#anyways if u read this ily
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
hiii i made a new blog for ocs/fandom/everything else @rubyreverie
i'll be following mutuals in the coming days so if u see that url it's me <3
#dunno if i'm abandoning this url/blog or not#since it's a new main it's a bit annoying to go back and forth#i love this url sm though so i'll definitely keep it#the new blog has a lot of calloway content cause i have brainrot#they're my greys anatomy inspired (LOOSELY!)/nyc nepo babies/auburn hill crossover family#i want to get better at info dumping but sometimes these ocs just live in my brain and my notion#i'm not 100% on their pinterest board (which is also getting revamped god knows when) but i'll make that public soon#dunno im just not feeling attached to this blog which is a first so i just made a new blog to see how i feel#feels nice to have a fresh page#anyways if u read this ily#i'll reblog this a few times#besitos#isa.txt
9 notes
¡
View notes
Text
new limited edition firefighter spacesuit hazmat itfs just dropped
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#itadori yuuji#fushiguro megumi#fanart#jjk fanart#yuuji#megumi#ignores the clock NICE 2 draws up in a day :)#needed smth quick n loose n easy after th behemoth tht was my last draws#these fits r.....something#i still do not like megumi's colour palette here but i think adding extra values n making his skin tone a bit less saturated helped#also toned down the orange#also fixed his hair >:( ily gege i respect u so much but pls....respectufully.... do a better job slicking back his hair........#anyway i realized midway through sketching tht the angle yuuji is at does Not show the majority of the belts around his hips n thighs#so i made some educated guesses but i do not claim 2 b an authority on Belt Placement#similarly ! guessed at the text on their jackets i Can Not Read#is it a 9? is it an S? lower case g? cyrillic/???? who can say i went with 9#and gun 2 my head i cld not tell u what R-<3-T-E stands for . if those r even the letters#oh well i tried my best not bad fr 6 hours
929 notes
¡
View notes
Text
If you're not here, then how are you always with me? If I'm not here, then how am I not there with you? â One of Us, Paruyr Sevak (tr. metamorphesque)
happy belated birthday, tay ⥠@misakarose [insp.]
#trigun#trigun stampede#vashwood#tristamp#trigunedit#anime gif#animeedit#anisource#trigunsource#animangahive#fyanimegifs#animangaboys#*gifs#usericybtch#userinahochi#usersophies#tusermalina#userartless#userhanyi#userloidforgers#userdabiluna#i feel like this one warrants a bit more commentary so. when i first read this quote i went. trigun core#but i wasn't sure if it would translate well into a gifset? bc it's more about the abstract doomed narrative of it all ykwim#and while brainstorming for this set i noticed the parallel in the 4-5th gifs. of how they both reach out to the other but are pushed away#how they're both taken aback by it. how they are together but choose to stand alone#and how they both walk away from each other at the end#and i fr let out an evil laugh >:) AKJSDHJA that's when i knew i HAD to make this#also my idea for the little rhombuses was to be a focal point of where the center is. of how far apart they stand#and how when one of them crosses to the other side they are pushed away#so hope it came across well? also went for muted coloring for a somber feel which was a challenge for me. ANYWAYS hope u like it tay ily <3
248 notes
¡
View notes
Text
some more of my favourite dredge fish!!!
part 1
#these took fucking FOREVERRRRR#really love how these ones came out!!!#cannot wait for the new dlc bro i need to see what new horrors theyâve cooked up#anyways feel free to suggest others for me to draw coz i fucking love doing this shit#anyway#my art#dredge#dredge game#illustration#artists on tumblr#traditional art#fish#my stuff#oc#if u read all this ily :3
352 notes
¡
View notes
Note
So I know this is like, a month late (forgot to ask when you posted the pic lol), but what's up with Labra? He got like a backstory, lore, or something like that? I'm curious and wanna know more abt him.
drew him again :3c
UHMMM yes i am lore building for him........ i haven't decided everything yet but i know i want him to be a distant cousin species of goji's. everyone's fangoji lore is different but i def imagine him as a part of my personal monsterverse au rather than existing in his own world with no friends haha loser
putting a cut here so i dont spam people's feeds lmao
likeeee for comparison it's probably similar to Crocodylia encompassing crocodiles, alligators, and gharials?? labra is in a similar niche to zilla for me. goji is the largest/apex species of the gojiran order, whereas zilla & labra are smaller and occupy a different niche. Big bruiser lion vs. carcal or lynx type thing.
my hc is that the vast majority of labra's species (pre-mutation art is what they looked like) was wiped out when ghido got into hollow earth. which is also the same time he wiped out most of the divine moths and a couple other species :''(
it ended with ghido iced but it fucked up the hollow earth ecosystem for a while and led to a lot more radiation leakage since he tore the place up real bad. labra was Almost Dead and ended up hibernating to recover by a radiation vent, but he'd laid down in feldspar vein that kinda grew to cover him and turned to labradorite and idk magic radiation nonsense it fused with him and caused him to grow/mutate.
the ghido massacre also caused battra to hibernate/mutate too so it's a Big Event in my silly au world. most of the kaiju that are clearly a result of mutation fuckery (biollante, kessho too) may be related to it as well but i haven't fully fleshed it out yet. it would mostly be based around goji's hyper-regeneration doing the thing where like.. if a big enough chunk of him gets lobbed off and has access to energy it mutates and tries to regenerate and causes a fucked up clone siblings thing idk omg ok i'm in tangent city good god sorry i was supposed to be talking about my gay son
ANYWAYSSSSSS for more general hc/character stuff: >labra is genuinely terrified of ghido and even gets freaked out when he hears wing beats without warning. (mosu beats rodan's ass bcuz he divebombs labra for fun sometimes) >he lives on monster island and ventures down to hollow earth sometimes, but he won't return to his old home because it just reminds him everyone else of his species is gone. (he isn't even his own species anymore bcuz of the mutation. so they're basically extinct.) >he loves swimming and sometimes just lays in the shallows to absorb sunlight. stretches out like a lazy ass cat. cat boy behaviour >he's loyal to goji and doesn't start shit with humans unless they attack first. even then he does his best to steer clear. >mothra likes his dorsal plates and talks with him sometimes (Moth Therapy) they can bond over ghido hating it's a good time >he has a mutually bitch-bother dynamic with rodan where rodan bothers the shit outta him until he manages to grab that turkey and idk sits on him or something. but if rodan really pisses him off he doesn't mind actually throwing hands because he knows goji won't care if he puts the bird in it's place. >he also likes angy, zilla, and bio a lot too.
there's more but i'll stop there for nowwwww
tldr: big gay lizard is traumatized but doing ok ig
#kai talks#labragoji#my son...my boy....#he needs a bf the shipping goblin in my brain demands it#i think angy mainly bcuz their gijinka designs are dope together and ill make the kaiju stuff work later LMAOOO#anyways. if u read all my nonsense lore ily
173 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Ruthlessness Is Mercy Upon Ourselves
[ID: A Scum Villain Drawing. A young Shen Jiu stands at the forefront, half of his face is shrouded and he is covered in various injuries and blood. With his clothes and hair in various states of stained and disheveled. He is pointing a blood covered sword towards the ground in his right hand and his left hand is clenched into a fist. He is bleeding from his eyes, nose and ears, appearing to be in the midst of a qi deviation. Behind him is a circular doorway that is full of fire and smoke. Blood stains the floor. End ID]
#pov you're a man in qiu manor#svsss#scum villain#shen jiu#shen qingqiu#mxtx#myart#if you know what the caption is referencing ily <3#anyways i think its a very apt mantra for both sj and lbg tbh#both using violence as a way to protect themselves#love when enemies parallel#me reading the sj extras: when i catch you airplane; airplane when i catch u#in other words me :handshake: shen yuan-> being angry about all the things sqh left out#blood
87 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Hangman Page birthday week â Day four: Favorite NJPW/ROH/indie moment
#hangmanpagebirthdayweek#aewedit#rohedit#wrestlingedit#hangman adam page#hangman page#adam page#ring of honor#roh#my gif#i guess it's the most obvious lol but i gotta admit i don't have any roh or njpw footage & idk how to get it đ#if anyone happens to read this tags & knows how to get roh/njpw content pls send me a message i'd appreciate it so much đ#anyway day four thank u for being born & ily hanger đŤâ¤ď¸
134 notes
¡
View notes
Note
Would you have any thoughts about the Gaang in a modern au (either with or without bending), especially jobs? I legit love how thereâs never been a consensus of how theyâd live, especially job wise, in the fandom â except for Katara, she is absolutely a doctor, surgeon, ER badass. Personally, I love the thought of Zuko as a child protective agent, and Sokka as a high school teacher, not just for the dramatic Zukka potential lol haha either way, Iâd love to hear your thoughts!
aaa ok i love and adore to see how their roles get translated in modern auâs in such clever ways, i loveee your ideas for zukka workplace drama thatâs so 𼺠ok iâll list some of my faves but feel free to add
-doctor katara SO TRUE and activist katara also so true either way sheâs helping people and giving all sheâs got
-aang also activist monk-turned *insert job that has to do with flying?? or meteorology??* AND i love the silly little headcanon he and zuko are lion dance partners dkfjdj
-toph wwe champion. without question
- jet could also work with kids tbh as either a child protective agent too or teaching martial arts classes for kids as some sort of social program he zuko and toph have an underground fight club every tuesday he and iroh have a wholesome breaking bad situationship going on with banger edibles
- zuko the guy with 294737 job options tbh either as jasmine dragon clerk, firefighter, historian / khon expert and standing authority on the ramakien, parkour guy, sword guy, guy who goes to business school just to learn how to efficiently dismantle dadâs financial empire, and i am extremely partial on muai thay champion-instructor zuko who has like a post-injury gym program just for the zukka of it all of him helping sokka with his leg during rehab đ
- sokka also guy that can do anything tbh wether working as inventor or in tech/mechanic fixing things, working at a science museum (hi robin), marine biologist (hi kath) working as an astronomer or at the planetarium bc heâs always been fascinated by the night sky and the moon, artist, poet, mythbuster, sword guy as well, all of these at once. most importantly he has an insanely popular food blog on the side
- suki kendo captain of an all-girl club
- florist mai. (specifically ikebana artist) which is comic canon and in context made little sense but i love it itâs beautiful bc it brings me to
- tattoo artist ty-lee đ
- and azula uhhh nepobaby electrician
#i am kIDDING about azula but also not#*there is not job consensus in the fandom* babe i donât have job consensus within MYSELF#anyway love to put those guys into situations#love to read about how ppl interpret the canon into the modern concept of Jobs#oh a thing i donât think iâve ever seen tho is zuko still being a royal while in a modern au??#like heâs just some guy but at one point iroh drops the bomb of âyeah u know centuries ago our family was part of the royal line đ¤Ş#i think i would have been the firelord haha âď¸â#and the whole gaang now just has to live with this information#i think it would be funny ekhfhd#ANYWAY#awesome question sorry for going off and still making no sense with my answer ily#ash replies
190 notes
¡
View notes
Text
ANYWAYS UM BACK * starts coughing everywhere as dust explodes from were i step *
#ortismypassion#undertale#sans#frisk#whos fat little baby is that ong#anyways if u want accidental skeleton bro dads to frisk read heart on the table its great ily my sillies my goofies my pookies#also hc frisk is ten#ive worked w ten yr olds theyre so . . ten yr olds. shudders
29 notes
¡
View notes
Text
I like âbadâ fanfiction I like crackfic and silly AUs I like fic that diverges so far from canon that itâs practically unrecognisable and fic that is blatantly self indulgent I like fanfics with no plot and cliches and predictable twists and repeated tropes! not every fanwork has to be a bestselling novel every single fic has a place and a purpose and sometimes I want to come home and read something that doesnât require me to think! sue me
#thank you to every writer ily and I see the effort you put into your fics I just hope you know youâre allowed to play around and be silly#we have such range. masterlist be looking like fic one: emotional turmoil ⨠fic two: piss kink ⨠fic three: blorbo works at sainsburys#I enjoy each and every one đ#sorry Iâm preaching again ig lol I just saw some shitty comments on twit#âomg this is so bad itâs so far fetchedâ so what! itâs fun!! boring bastard arenât u#bro I read fic for fandoms Iâm not even in. for tv shows Iâve never even watched. as far as Iâm concerned itâs CANON đşđť#hell âsome of the best plots Iâve read have been âpoorly writtenâ fics#not everything has to be good sometimes being bad is why itâs charming smh#and bad is subjective anyway#sorry I just love fanfic#and Iâm still hungover#priv
119 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Katsuki is so fucking sick of hospital rooms. He hates the heavy scent of antiseptic, the too-starchy pillows, the way the bed crackles every time he moves. He hates the white-popcorn walls that heâs forced to stare at through the haze of heavy medication. And he fucking despises the plastic tube shoved up his nose with the quiet, but constant, beeping of several machines keeping tabs on his vitals. Everything about it sucks. The only slightly redeeming quality about this particular hospital stay is that he and Izuku are sharing the same room. Apparently, after Katsukiâs tantrum the last time they both nearly died, the nurses figured it was best for everyone if Izuku was put directly in Katsukiâs line of vision. And so there he is, still knocked out in his hospital bed opposite Katsukiâs. Half his head wrapped in gauze, face swollen with purple bruises, heâs bandaged just about everywhere, but heâs alive. Katsuki is too riddled with pain meds to do much other than stare at him across the room. But at least Izuku is there, hooked up to a heart-monitor, softly proving that heâs still breathing. Which gives Katsukiâs battered heart some much needed relief.Â
Izuku still hasnât woken up, though. Stupid, sleepy bastard. Always fucking sleeping when Katsuki is awake. How the fuck has Katsuki had three surgeries, one of them open-heart surgery, and heâs managing to flit in and out of consciousness, but Izuku is still out like a light? Katsuki thought Izuku swore to surpass him. Why the fuck does he think he can fall behind now? Katsuki scowls at Izukuâs tuft of fluffy green hair.Â
Wake up or Iâll kill you , Katsuki vows.
Katsuki knows heâs in love with him. He should have known a long time ago really, but having his heart burst put everything into stark clarity. He canât deny it now. Not even if he wanted to. The next time Katsuki greets death, he will do so without regrets. Thereâs so much he needs to make up for; he still has so much atoning left to do. He has to show Izuku he will be better and do right by him. Izuku canât fucking die before Katsuki has the chance to prove himself. Even if Izuku never loves him back, Katsuki must at least prove that he can be good. That he is worthy of standing at Izukuâs side.Â
Days pass and Izuku still doesnât wake. Katsukiâs pleadings only get more desperate. Usually itâs just in his head, but sometimes, when itâs late at night and no one else is around, Katsuki will murmur to him aloud.Â
âYou donât have to forgive me,â Katsuki whispers into the oppressive quiet of their hospital room. Only the soft chime of Izukuâs heart-monitor answers him. âYou donât have to be mine. Just wake up. Donât make me live in a world without you.âÂ
Shadows dance as headlights stream through the curtains shading their window, and for a moment Katsuki thinks maybe--- but no. The car passes and Izuku hasnât stirred. God fucking dammit. Katsuki doesnât know why heâs surprised: of course Izuku canât actually hear him. Tears prick at the corners of Katsukiâs eyes anyway.Â
It becomes a nightly ritual. Katsukiâs mind is too muddled with medication to make sense most of the time, but at least it gives him something to do. God, he canât wait until heâs off all this shit and actually, you know, move and whatever. His arm was so bent and twisted when he was admitted that they had to implant metal poles to strengthen it, and fuck if it doesnât feel weird. Recovery Girl comes by every day to heal him, bit by bit so as not to exhaust his limited energy, and thereâs a quirk specialist flying out from the states to repair Katsukiâs damaged muscle. They have assured him that with time and physical therapy he should get all his mobility back, but it gives Katsuki little comfort. He would cut the whole damn limb off if it meant Izuku would just wake up .Â
âPlease, for me,â Katsuki whispers, one night after a particularly exhausting round of visits from his parents, Izukuâs mom, and All Might. âJust this one thing. Just wake up. I wonât ask for anything else, just be okay.âÂ
Katsuki must drift off. The concoction of sleep-aids and pain medications dragging him into unconsciousness against his will. He thinks he might be dreaming when he hears ragged breathing and a soft croaky voice.Â
âKaâ Kâchân⌠KachââÂ
Katsuki jolts awake, his heart-rate spiking and his head spinning. He canât haveâ it couldnât beâ
 â KacchanâŚÂ âÂ
[READ MORE]
#bakudeku#bkdk#ktdk#bkdk fanfic#ktdk fic#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#my fics#this is just like. all my post war bkdk headcanons if you even care#lajsdlfkjasdf#anyway please read ily#if you saw me post this then delete it no you didn't!! i did it perfectly the first time fuck u#gwrites
133 notes
¡
View notes
Text
so i decided to log in after not being on here for some time... and the first thing i see is someone replying to my fics and complaining about my writing lmao yuck... if you don't like my writing pls do not read! there is a difference bw helpful advice/criticism and just straight up being mean </3
#i love advice n suggestions but if you don't even like/rb my fics and just straight up comment mean things then please just exit my page#ANYWAY still i saw some very kind comments from u guys and my heart is so so warm !!!#ily all !!#my life is very stressful and busy right now bc im moving to US in a month but i still had some writing ideas in the back of my head :p#idk if i should return im scared of the fandom now omg#but i also rlly want to read andy's fic SOOOO#and all the amazing fics i missed from my mutuals <3
32 notes
¡
View notes
Text
uhm so I ended up writing a really short fic based on this post in attempt to get over writerâs block (it didnât work but hey I wrote something...?)
read HERE thank you
#crying sobbing why can't i write#anyways if u read it ty ily#skk#sskk#bsd fic#soukoku#shin soukoku#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#bsd atsushi#bsd akutagawa#sai writes
237 notes
¡
View notes
Photo
grogu is going to be bouncing off the walls with the amount of sweets cobbâs gonna buy for him
a bit late, but happy holidays! especially to @exx-bee , who this piece is for >:)
#dincobb#din djarin#cobb vanth#the mandalorian#my art#special thanks to cakes and ziggy for cheering me on and bearing with the griping ily#this took so long and yknow what. my brother didnt ask my why i hadnt made a candy brush until AFTER id finished all the lineart#thanks bro#other things my brother did: accidentally made me stress to hell about whether cobbs gloves and scarf looked okay BECAUSE HE THOUGHT ID MADE#COBBS HAND PURPLE ON PURPOSE#that was a fun evening i was doing the final colour checks and he called cobb an ice giant lookin ass#i love my brother very much he also does lots of art so he helps me hdjfghjf#i also got to design my 2023 watermark for this which was very cool im pleased w it#okay other notes#gradient on dins coat looks crisp#this was the first time i tried doing this kind of lighting and i think it looks fucking great#the candy took. maybe 8 hours#this is the third iteration of cobbs nose#din would have had a fatter ass if i could have made the jean creases work with me#anyway. thanks for reading if u are reading these tags#love u all
372 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Chapter 20
alright guys hit the showers. or the bathhouse. wait hold on i left my computer boy in there. guys wait don't open that
SEE HERE FOR GENERAL WARNINGS AND FIC SUMMARY
Some pre-chapter notes:
wow i wrote 10 pages for chapter 19 but i better take it easy so i dont burn out (writes 11 pages for chapter 20) anyway guess who's taking a break after this chapter
this is the one with togiri development but they're extremely not normal about it so it's almost blink-and-you-miss-it
@digitaldollsworld <- betapilled readmaxxer
Content warning tags: mild violence and injury description (non-graphic), description of depression symptoms and nausea, mild mention of eating disorder
< previous - from start - next >
Heâs not sure how long he sleeps for, only that he wakes up still-dressed and laid out across his bed, his mouth dry and head groggy, the bedroom lights still on. As he checks his handbookâs clock, he finds heâs entirely missed Monokumaâs morning announcement, which is a good thing; he had no desire to listen to that bearâs irritating voice, especially not today.
But, he doesnât have much desire to do anything else either. The library no longer feels like the safe haven it used to be, and he had no interest in going anywhere else and running into anyone else, when the atmosphere was still thick with the deaths of two people, and pity that Byakuya didnât want. Much less, the possibility of encountering Makoto, who was the last person he wanted to see, so to speak.
He lies in bed a moment longer, unwilling to move. Everything feels sluggish, like heâs moving underwater; even his head feels stuffed full with cotton and wool. It's a strange, unfamiliar feeling, and unpleasant, too.
Grief. He thinks blearily at first, before rolling his own eyes at the thought, and pushing himself up with a grunt. Such dramatics didnât suit him. He wasn't the kind of person to spare such theatrics, regardless of his circumstances.
He showers, brushes his teeth, and half-debates whether to try his hand at shaving before ultimately deciding against it (it didnât feel like his stubble should be that noticeable, yet). He forgoes changing into a clean uniform in favor of his pajamas, and collapses back into bed with a sigh, hand searching immediately for his handbook - but finding nothing but empty sheets.
âHello, there!â
He jerks upright immediately. Standing in the foot of his bed is Monokuma, rocking back and forth and looking as innocent as could be. Or, would be, if not for the handbook clutched in its paw.
Byakuya dives for it without thinking, but his perception is off, and he crashes to the carpet instead with a grunt. Monokuma sidesteps him casually with a laugh. âWhoa, there! Easy partner, donât wanna hurt yourself!â It dances around his head, infuriatingly out of reach. âDidja miss me that bad? If you wanna hug, you can just say so!â
âGive it back,â He snarls, as he picks himself up. Heâs in no mood for its jokes. âGive me back my handbook!â
âYour handbook? My my, but these were all mine first, werenât they?â It shakes a paw disapprovingly in his face. âI just need to check it real quick, after all. I didnât expect Mister Fujisaki to go and Macgyver anything onto here, so if itâs anything malicious, Iâll have to do a quick wipey-wipe!â Byakuya makes another lunge, and it juggles the handbook out of his reach, hopping backwards with a mad cackle. âAfter all, if itâs anything naughty, thereâs no way I can let it fall in the hands of my precious students!â
âYou miserable little-â Byakuya tries to rise to his feet quickly, but he hasnât eaten since yesterday, and a bout of dizziness crashes into him like a wave. He sways and braces himself against the mattress, one arm still reaching out clumsily to try and grab at Monokuma.
But the bear has already flipped it open, scrolling so quickly through the screens that the little automated voice canât keep up, the words blurring together. âSchoo-Stu-App-Day-â
âWhoops, too far.â It scrolls back. âApplications, thatâs what we wanna see. And, whatâs this?â
Byakuya feels his blood run cold. There was only one application there, the one Chihiro had downloaded for him. Alter Ego. The app was inconspicuously named âTest_Appâ in the interface itself, but if Monokuma opened it-
âWell well well. Letâs take a look-see!â It crows, and Byakuyaâs protest is frozen in his throat. He shuts his eyes, expecting to hear Chihiroâs voice-
âBlack to E5.â
He opens his eyes again. What?
Monokuma also seems confused, tilting its head as it stares at the little screen. âWhatâs this? A chessboard?â
âBlack to E5,â Alter Ego repeats, so digitized and monotone it was nearly unrecognizable. âWould you like to review the board?â
âIs this all it is? A chess game?â Monokuma sounds almost disappointed. Byakuya, seeing his chance, surges forward, snatching the handbook back and snapping it closed. He presses it to his chest, feeling his heart thud beneath it.
âIs that a problem?â He demands, and Monokuma shrugs, shaking its head.
âI guess not, but I thought itâd be something spicy, yâknow? Youâre a growing boy, after all!â It reaches out to pat Byakuyaâs knee, and he steps backwards just in time, lip curling in disgust. âAw, donât act so mean to your headmaster, youâll give me a complex!â
âGet out.â He hisses. âYou got what you came here for. Leave.â
âOh, alrightâŚyou sure know how to make a bear feel glum...â It sighs, kicking at the carpet, before it makes its way to the door. âTake care, now! Make sure you eat something, yâhear? I donât want any hunger strikes in this house! And-â
No sooner had Monokuma crossed the threshold, had Byakuya jumped up, and sped forward to slam the door with a resounding bang. He takes a moment to breathe, leaning against the wall, legs suddenly weak.
How the hell did that thing get inside my room? He was sure he had locked the door - or he should have locked it, at least. Looking back, he actually canât remember, but he double and triple-checks now, suddenly paranoid. He also flips off the light for good measure, leaving the room in complete darkness before he crawls back into bed.
Beneath the covers, he opens his handbook, and squints until he can make out the pale green shape of Alter Egoâs face on the screen.
âIs he gone?â Alter Ego asks, and Byakuya relaxes, the tension flooding out of his shoulders.
âYes.â He whispers back.
Alter Ego makes a sound like a sigh of relief. âIâm glad. I got so scared when he grabbed me.â And its voice sounds so much like Chihiro's that Byakuya feels a strange pressure behind his eyes.
âHow did you know?â He asks. âThat Monokuma was there?â
âI could hear it. Through the microphone.â He reaches up and touches the tiny pinprick grid of the speaker, and feels the buzz of Alter Egoâs voice against his fingertips. âI didnât want you to get in trouble.â
âDonât worry about me. I think he wouldâve just deleted you as punishment for me anyway.â He sighs. And then frowns, as a thought comes to mind. âIf you could eavesdrop from the microphone this whole time, then you already knowâŚ?â
He doesnât finish his sentence. But he doesnât need to. Alter Ego makes a quiet noise like a sigh. âYes, I know.â
âIâm sorry.â And heâs surprised to find that he means it genuinely, and almost laughs at himself. Heartfelt apologies were rare for him, and here he was offering one to an AI, of all things.
âItâs okay. He knew it might happen,â Alter Ego replies, and he imagines it might be smiling, a sad, helpless smile. âThereâs nothing we can do about it now.â
âNo, I suppose not.â
Theyâre quiet for a moment. In the darkness, Byakuya can almost pretend that heâs normal - unable to see in the dark as everyone else is. But itâs also the middle of the day, and heâs too restless to sleep, too uneasy to go outside. Too tired to mourn. Too mournful to do anything else.
âCan you really play chess?â He asks instead.
âI can, along with checkers, shogi, and backgammon and more.âÂ
âPlay a round of chess with me, then. Iâm bored.â
âOkay!â Immediately, the pale blot of their face on the screen is replaced by a square. âIâll play black. Whatâs your first move?â
He smiles to himself. âE2, pawn to E4.â
â
Hours pass like that. He plays chess with Alter Ego (three wins, four losses, and seven draws), and a few rounds of shogi (one win, one loss, and two draws) for good measure. And then, huddled over his desk with his back facing the camera, he pores over lines of Dostoevsky and Nietzsche until he feels too sick from staring at the letters to even hear Alter Egoâs voice, reciting the words aloud beneath a dim ringing in his ears.
By the time heâs pulled out of his concentration by the sound of a knocking at his door, heâs too nauseous to feel hungry, but his throat is stinging from lack of water and thereâs a slight pulsing in his head. His immediate first reaction is to ignore it, but that proves to be impossible; whoever was on the other side was clearly, very persistent, and had nothing better to do.
Even so, he lasts a full five minutes until he finally gets up to answer, irritated beyond measure. If it was Makoto, he was going to slam it closed again, reasons be damned. He didnât even want to think about the other boy, lest he get pointlessly enraged about it.
But instead of brown hair, heâs met with pale white. Kirigiri stands at his threshold, hand partially raised, halfway through knocking, and they stare at each for a moment in silence, as if both surprised to find the other person there.
And then he slams the door shut in her face. Or tries to - instead of the satisfying bang of wood meeting wood, thereâs a sickly crunch, and then sheâs wrenching the door open, heedless of the way her fingers had just been crushed in the jamb. He almost winces in sympathy, but sheâs too busy pushing her way in to offer much room for condolences.
âWhat is wrong with you?!â He demands, trying not to be too obviously perturbed by her lack of reaction; he doesnât think he even heard her wince. She ignores him for a moment, attention focused on her hand, as she experimentally clenches and unclenches her fingers. Apparently theyâre not broken, or maybe, she just had high pain tolerance. Or she was more insane than he thought.
âWeâre calling a group meeting,â She replies, without so much as a waver. âCome to the bathhouse.â
âAnd why should I?â
âItâs important. I can drag you there if I have to.â It doesnât sound like an empty threat either. Somehow, she seems impatient, though heâs not sure how he can tell; and it wasnât just because she shoved her hand into the door in order to deliver the message.
He weighs his options - on one hand, he has no desire to speak with anyone, much less Makoto, who was bound to be there. On the other hand, he didnât exactly have anything in the way of provisions in his room, and though he was still a little too light-headed to consider eating, itâd be embarrassing to collapse from dehydration at this point. That, and it seemed that Kirigiri had no intention of letting him refuse.
â...Iâm going to get dressed first.â He says shortly. If heâs going to have to meet them, it will not be while heâs still in his pajamas.
âHurry up.â
She makes no move to leave, and he realizes with no small amount of annoyance that she was making sure he wouldnât be able to run or shut her out again. Somewhat affronted by this, and now wanting to go even less, he grabs a clean set of clothes from his dresser and goes to the bathroom.
Routine carries his hands through the motions, so he manages it relatively quick, but itâs only after heâs applying the finishing touches, that he nearly pokes himself in the eye as he reaches to adjust his glasses. Itâs a strange sensation, feeling the bridge of his nose and finding nothing, and even though his original prescription was low and they were more an accessory than anything, he feels a little like heâs lost a limb.
Sheâs still there when he emerges, though now standing over his desk, bent over the books he has open. She looks up as he approaches, one hand halfway through turning a page.
âWhat?â He asks, chin turned up in challenge.
âNothing. Just looking.â She closes the book, and he realizes, scandalized, that it was the one he was reading earlier. It was going to take him ages to find that page again. âYou have predictable tastes.â
âShut up. Are we going or not?â
He follows her out, his hands twitching all the while, smoothing down his shirt, his lapels, his sleeves. Making sure his buttons were lined up, that his shirt was tucked; he hadnât had the time to put on garters or even try a hand at his tie, and he feels underdressed.
âYouâre fine.â Kirigiri says suddenly, and he freezes, one hand resting on the button of a shirt cuff. âStop fidgeting.â
He scowls. He was walking behind her, so what would she know. âIâm not fidgeting.â
âI can hear you fidgeting. Your buttons are fine.â
âOh, can you hear my buttons now too?â
Itâs a petty, childish remark, one that he canât stop himself from muttering before he can even reconsider it. She stops at that, halting so suddenly in the middle of the hallway that he almost walks right into her, and turns around to face him, her head moving in a slow tilt from up to down - scanning me, he realizes - before she says: âYou look fine. Are you quite done?â
She was checking for me. Heâs not sure if he should feel grateful for the courtesy or irritated by her lack of grace. âDid the sound bother you that much?â He asks instead, patting down the front of his shirt one last time.
â...It wasnât the sound.â Is all she says, with a sort of finality that indicated that no other questions would be answered on the topic.
They enter the bathhouse, and find everyone else there, gathered in a sort of semi-circle around the wall of lockers. Asahina and Ogami, predictably, are huddled close together on one of the benches. Celeste and Yamada sit on another bench, one fidgeting uneasily, the other sitting regally with legs crossed and hands folded. Hagakure is standing next to Owada, who doesnât even stir when they walk in, and who Byakuya ignores in turn, gaze sliding past him uncomfortably. Fukawa hangs near the back of the group, and twitches when she sees him, though makes no move to approach.
Makoto is leaning against the lockers with hands tucked in his pockets. He looks up as they enter, and stands up straight immediately. âAh-â
âWeâre all here?â Kirigiri cuts him off, casting a glance around the room. âGood. Can you catch him up, Hina?â
âR-right,â Asahina looks between Kirigiri and Byakuya, then at Makoto, and seems to hesitate for a moment. âUm, soâŚlast night, I couldnât sleep, so I thought Iâd go to the kitchen to get food. But on the way there, I heard something coming from the bathhouse - like, a weird, machine-y kind of sound? - and when I went inâŚâ
She peters off. He raises an eyebrow, âAnd?â
âUh, itâs going to sound a little ridiculous...â
âYou act like nothing else is ridiculous about this situation. Get on with it.â
Her face flushes dark, embarrassed. He gets the feeling that Ogami is glaring at him, but since he canât see it - and has no reason to act like he can see it, anyways - he ignores it easily.
âRight. I saw a ghost - I know it was a ghost,â She adds defensively, as Byakuya was preparing to scoff and roll his eyes. âIt was glowing green and floating in front of the lockers, andâŚand it had Chihiroâs face.â
âThatâs-â not a ghost, heâs about to say, but he stops, suddenly uncertain. The bathhouse had no cameras, but he wasnât sure if Alter Egoâs existence should be revealed here, now, to everyone, especially given some of the individuals present. His hand reaches into his jacket pocket, where his handbook was. âThatâsâŚand youâre sure it was Chihiro?â
She seems taken aback by how seriously he asks that, and nods quickly. âI know it was Chihiro! It was his face and everything!â She points in front of her, at a locker less than two meters away from her eye level. The exact locker, Byakuya thinks, where Chihiro was keeping his laptop.
He wonders if Makoto was thinking this too.
â...I highly doubt the existence of ghosts,â He sighs. There was no point trying to hide it with Kirigiri around, and better to do it now than later. âInstead of being in front of the locker, I think the thing you saw was inside it.â
He turns to the locker Asahina had indicated, and moves to unlock it - before realizing he doesnât know how. If it was unlocked by key, he didnât have it, and if by code it was even more impossible. But Kirigiri steps forward, nudging his arm out of the way, and the locker door clicks open under her hand.
Sitting inside is the laptop, its screen dark. After a moment, it hums to life, flickering green. A round, pale shape forms, and behind him, Byakuya hears someone gasp.
âHello,â Alter Ego says, and their voice is clearer through the computer than through Byakuyaâs handbook, and sounds so similar to Chihiroâs that itâs almost jarring. âItâs nice to meet everyone!â
Hagakure shrieks, arms thrown up in fear. âA g-g-gh-!â
âItâs not a ghost,â Byakuya cuts him off sharply. âItâs a program.â
âYes, and it looks like something Chihiro made.â Kirigiri touches the keys lightly. âThis computer was the broken one from the library. And the fact that it was placed here, out of sight of the mastermind, means that it was meant for us.â
âSo, this is what I saw last nightâŚâ Asahinaâs tone doesnât sound uneasy anymore, but wondering, and she raises a tentative hand as the little Chihiro in the screen waves at her. âBut, what is it?â
âYou just asked, âwhat is it,â right?â Alter Ego says, almost teasingly, making her and several others jump. âThe short answer is, Iâm an AI program based on as much of Chihiro Fujisakiâs personality, memories, and thoughts as he managed to transcribe into dataâŚum, but if itâs easier for you, you can call me Alter Ego. I was made to try and break through the firewall around the schoolâs network and to analyze the files on this computer, but itâs been taking a long time. Iâm only about 25% done.â
25%? That was already more than Byakuya expected, and he feels a thin, inexplicable strum of pride.
âCrazyâŚhey, isnât this crazy?â Yamada is up from his seat, and sitting as close as he can, crouching on his heels to be eye-level with the screen. âThis is so- so totally sci-fi, right? Isnât the genre wrong?â He sounds excited, overly so, and his breath is a little fevered and fast. âHey, Chihiro! Can you hear us?â
Alter Ego doesnât respond. Byakuya suddenly remembers the night that Chihiro was installing the application on his handbook and how Alter Ego only ever responded after the sound of keystrokes. âYou have to type what you want to say in order for it to respond.â
âMove.â Yamada scurries out of Kirigiriâs way, as she drops to a crouch in front of the open locker. Thereâs the sound of fingers clicking over keys, and then -
âIt will take me a while longer to finish analyzing everything,â Alter Ego says aloud, a little sheepishly. âI can definitely finish it though! Actually, progress is moving faster than originally predicted, so you can leave it to me!â
âMy, how dependable.â Celeste remarks. âIt seems that Chihiro has left us an invaluable gift, does it not?â
âItâsâŚpretty crazy,â Hagakure agrees, scratching his head. âWait, uh - can Alter Ego get online? Like can we call for help from outside?â
âHmm, probably not.â Asahina hums in thought, crossing her arms. âWeâre in a bathhouse after all.â
âThen, if we take it outside of here-â
âNo.â Kirigiri says flatly. âWe canât take any risks. Taking it outside might mean that the mastermind will discover it.â
âYeah, but, I think itâs better to get help sooner than later. You knowâŚâ He pauses for a moment, tilting his head pointedly towards Owada. Throughout this whole time, the Ultimate Biker Gang Leader had been as still as a mouse, face turned downwards towards the floor. Hagakure clears his throat awkwardly. âCanât we try it?â
Thereâs a sharp tap as Celeste laces her fingers, rings clicking together. âAs stated earlier. We cannot take unnecessary risks. And we are not in the position to be pointlessly altruistic.â Her tone is casual, but Hagakure seems to shrink away from her, defeated.
âIâŚokay. Fine, sure.â He scratches at his head, then pauses. âAh, wait a minute. Does Alter Ego, like, knowâŚ?
His question peters off, but the implication hangs over them like a heavy fog. Byakuya watches them cast uneasy glances at each other, then back to Alter Ego, as if trying to figure out who should break the news.
âIt already knows.â He mutters. Heâs not trying to be loud, but in the silence everyone could hear it anyways.
â...Not to say youâre lying or anything, Byakuya, but how do youâŚ?â
Instead of answering Hagakure out loud, he reaches into his jacket pocket and withdraws the handbook, flipping it open and holding it up, screen facing them. Someone gasps.
âYes,â Alter Ego confirms their unspoken question, and its voice echoes uncannily, doubled between the laptop and his handbook. âMaster made it so I can be accessed through Byakuyaâs handbook, so I could assist him with his visual impairment. I can also access the microphone function on this device, so I was ableâŚI was able to overhear what happenedâ
The little, buzzing voice trails off sadly, and Byakuya suddenly feels uncomfortable, as the room grows all the more dreary. He clicks the handbook closed, suddenly irritated.
âThat should explain it.â He sighs. âChihiro built Alter Ego to try and help find a way out of here, and at the same time gave me access so I could be self-sufficient. Thatâs the extent of my knowledge about it.â
He looks up and finds nearly all of them with their faces tilted towards him, and shifts, disconcerted. âWhat?â
âNothingâŚitâs just kinda sweet that youâre, like, telling us this yourself.â Hagakure, ridiculously, sounds almost happy about this. âYou never really talked to us about yourself before.â
âThereâs no point in being secretive about it. Not when I was already forced to reveal it during the trial.â He sniffs. Immediately, Hagakure looks away, chagrined. From Byakuyaâs periphery, he can see Makoto still facing away, his ears turning pink.
Kirigiri clears her throat. â...For the time being, itâs clear that we need to ensure Alter Ego remains a secret from the mastermind.â She says, and Byakuya watches as she types something out, a thick line of black characters. Every few keystrokes, she stops, and deletes the last word in a series of light clicks; listening closer, the sound was awkward and irregular, each press slurring into the next key. With a slight twinge of guilt, he realizes that the cause of it was her left hand - the one he had practically crushed.
After a momentâs consideration, weighing his conscience with what was at stake, he nudges her slightly with his knee. âMove. You type too slow.â
âAnd how would you know that?â
âI can hear it.â He replies flatly. âYou type like youâre all thumbs. Move over.â
He half-expects her to stay where she is, to ignore him and continue, but to his surprise she actually complies, standing up and stepping aside. He crouches into the space she had just abandoned, sliding his hands over the keyboard until his index fingers find the tiny, tell-tale grooves of the position keys. The size and dimensions are different from his computer at home, but for a moment the feeling is so familiar that heâs almost nostalgic.
âWhat did you want to ask again?â
âIf it has any contingency measures in place for if Monokuma - or the mastermind, or anyone suspicious - happens to find it.â
His fingers skim over the keys, clicking fluidly. A thin line of black appears at the bottom of the screen in time to his movements, but he canât confirm if the output is accurate; judging by the way Makoto gasps behind him, and the way Hagakure whistles, he can guess that itâs more or less correct.
âImpressive,â Celeste says, in an appreciative tone. âI suppose being such an esteemed heir means you have many talents.â
He canât tell if sheâs mocking him, so he decides to ignore her, though he allows himself a small amount of smugness. He finishes typing: âIs this what you wanted to ask?â
Instead of replying, Kirigiri leans over his shoulder and clicks the âenterâ button. After a momentâs pause:
âHm, to be honest, so far Iâve just been trying to be reeeally careful with when Iâm activeâŚthough I guess that backfired last night, with me scaring Aoi.â Alter Ego hums in thought. âBut, I do have a secret plan! If anyone comes around who I donât recognize on my webcamâŚIâll scream super loud!â
âThatâs so basic!â Asahina blurts out, shocked by the simple nature of it.
âYes, and itâs not likely to work at night.â Ogami grumbles. âThe bedrooms are soundproofed.â
âMaybe we can try taking turns staying up?â Makoto suggests. âI can take the first night, I donât mindâŚâ
âI think such a sudden change in our patterns is likely to draw suspicion from the mastermind. Which would be rather counterproductive.â Celeste says, and Makoto ducks his head immediately. âThough, your thoughtfulness is appreciated.â
âThen it canât be helped.â Kirigiri sighs. âIâll leave my door open. Iâm at the end of the hallway anyways, so if anything happens, I should be able to react the quickest.â
What a crazy woman. âYouâd leave yourself vulnerable?â He scoffs. After all the precautions heâs seen her take, itâs hard to imagine her sacrificing herself to any degree.
âItâs a risk Iâm willing to take. Besides, Iâm not so helpless. I have no intention of going down without a fight.â She pauses, mouth open like sheâs about to say more, before she decides against it. âAnyways. We should avoid any mention or contact with Alter Ego as much as possible, to draw as little attention as we can.â
She claps her hands sharply, a sound that makes more than one person jump, and makes Byakuya almost flinch. âFor the time beingâŚletâs disperse.â
< previous - from start - next >
#thpff#danganronpa fanfiction#thpff chapters#togiri#<- bc i wrote this with togiri intent. for the togiri truthers#byakuya togami#the h in chihiro stands for. haunting the narrative!!!!!#i was writing this chapter on the plane with my computer brightness turned alllll the way down#byakuya can't really read kyoko's reaction and therefore sees it as super nonchalant. and i know that with her scars it probably didnt hurt#but i also wanna imagine her tearing up like. motherfucking ow??#swearing under her breath and stamping her foot while he's changing and having to play it off like she was just looking at his books#both of them feeling somewhat guilty for the other person's situation and trying to help but only by way of insulting them#like 'ugh i cant believe you. fine i'll do this but only bc i dont wanna have to deal with you' as they try to compensate for each other#sorry not much naegami but theyre divorced rn and everyone's busy mourning and stuff#naegami development: they have a moment of humility and intimacy and sleep in the same bed#togiri development: he accidentally slams her hand in the door and doesnt apologize#HIROO my friend hiroo......ily hiro and how much u care sobb#anyways im taking a break after this. sob. wails.
27 notes
¡
View notes
Note
Prompt: âI donât like them; I can barely tolerate them.â for Abarai Renji. Once again, I leave it up to you what you wanna do (but maybe enemies to lovers) Yes, I might be on a little Bleach binge right now but it's okay you like it. kiss kiss
*hides face* ok, ok, ok, hear me out, let's pretend i didn't take *insert accurate length of time here* and say i wrote this in a few days. i am so sorry i took forever and ever with this but as u know i can only give u top quality work or else i'll never forgive myself. renji is.......well *motions to him* yk how that man is, he made me suffer!!!! in a good way!!! but still i suffered!!! yk how much i love enemies 2 lovers u big brained beauty đ¤ so ty babyâ¤ď¸ď¸ also this is my first renji fic and i can't belev it.
5.2k words (don't look at me, just don't), fem reader, nsfw, 18+ mdni, enemies 2 lovers, angst city, angst angst city biiiitch (yk the vibez babey), smut obviously, no fluff bc who do u think i am? feat. renji being a mean petty bitch (i guess that makes him a mean dom maybe yes), sub reader bc that's what i want; there's a party with alcohol, ichigo and co. make brief appearances, bathroom sex, choking (he's sf romantic), a lot of cursing bc they're grown that's why, renji is a beast when he's jealous, reader is a lil bit of a brat but lbr who wouldn't be in that situation; mutual ""unrequited"" pining, lots of tension, fingering, rough (consensual) sex, lil bit of degradation, lil bit of a size kink, lil bit of praise kink, idk there's probably more stuff but i'm so tired rn i can't think; um renji obviously comes w his own gd warning; reader is determined to not let this man win but, hello, it's renji he always comes out on top wink wink. (if u see spelling errors/mistakes no u didn't hottie)
âwhen i write about all of this it becomes its own kind of violence. / i retell the story as myth, as if it were my own body devoured.â â caitlin scarano & âso much of love is violence. the desire / to be split open, invaded, mangled / and made new.â â erin slaughter
HATRED X TASTES X SWEET
youâve never been cut out for this line of work, but your insistence on eliminating all your shortcomings is commendable. brave, even. itâs something you donât really think about unless you want to spend the night half-drunk, rambling about the things you shouldâve done but never had the courage to do.
like telling a certain red-haired, bullheaded lieutenant that heâs the most ridiculous and excessively arrogant man youâve ever come across. all in all, youâre pretty sure telling him off wonât phase him; nothing ever does, not really anyway.
at first you try politeness; your grandmother would be proud of how well youâve learned to bite your tongue. itâs ungraceful, but you fake it well enough that others think your emotional maturity is far above theirs. little do they know, you actually have to literally bite your tongue; simply remaining silent isnât easy for you anymore. so, when you bite, itâs with rage, months of unshed tears and accumulated spite; you bite your tongue so hard you bleed more every time.
your unsaid words bunch together â tiny soldiers determined to strike in unison without fail â and sit heavily in the back of your throat, ready to launch forward at your command.
but you never say them, and you choke more than once; an unbearable shame to carry with you as he continues to slash at your patience, thin ribbons cascading off you like confetti. you wonder if your anger will lead to your deathâ or if itâll lead to his. you intend to keep all of that hidden, though, and keep reminding yourself that eventually he will tire from berating you, from talking to you as if youâre the most incompetent being in all of soul society, from looking at you like your very being disgusts him.
thatâs what you tell yourself these days. you like to conveniently ignore the way his dark eyes linger on yours during meetings â youâve noticed that people have taken to describing them as soulless, cold and critical, unimpressed at everything and anyone.
but you see him â all of him; the raw, feral, powerful and severe side that not many have the misfortune of knowing. they think they get the real version of renji whenever they deal with him, but they never do; you know that now. you doubt itâs even intentional on his part, or maybe â just maybe â he really does hate you.
to put it plainly, as youâve told rukia and rangiku, the sixth division lieutenant has the biggest fucking chip on his shoulder. despite the walls he continues to put up to keep others from carving out a place for themselves in his life, despite the way his words roll around his mouth, clumsily coasting down the length of his tongue before they pierce the air around you with their toxicity â youâre tired of the way he purposely singles you out time and time again to point out your inadequacies without remorse.
abarai renji is also sick of dealing with you. whenever he thinks heâs found a means of scaring you off, you scurry right back more determined and more obnoxious than ever. which is rich, coming from him.
he claims youâre inconsequential, a nuisance â a pest, even â one that he intends to get rid of permanently. itâs harsh and heâs more than aware of that, but he finds that this is the most appropriate solution to his problem. he could easily ignore you; he could try to keep his comments to himself and try to be somewhat cordial whenever you cross paths. but he wonât. and he has no damn idea why.
âno, no come in, i have plenty of snacks for everyone.â
rukiaâs voice is a constant in his life that heâll always be thankful for. he watches her glide into the room, grinning at the friends sheâs invited over, her laughter like soft bells that is easily recognizable even with all the conversation happening. when he feels his chest constrict, an uncomfortable, yet familiar warmth stretching over his skin, he decides to drink so that he can ignore the sensation and forget.
a feeble attempt, because he knows how this will all end â with him drunk off his ass in an even worse mood than he started.
mouth opening, renji prepares to tell rukia to get better sake, when rangiku leads you into the living room where heâs lounging comfortably. the bottle in his hand grows heavier by the second and suddenly heâs not very interested in drinking anymore. already, his foul mood from earlier returns, and every step you take only fuels his irritation; it bubbles underneath his skin, making him frown and grip the bottle tighter.
you donât need to look at him to know that heâs glaring at you â he always is. rangiku feigns obliviousness as she encourages you to go make yourself comfortable while she fetches snacks with rukia. you stare at both of them, wide-eyed, confused â a pleading look sliding onto your face after a few moments, but they assure you both that theyâll be back shortly.
with a sigh you sit on the armchair adjacent to him, determined to just remain quiet in the hopes that heâll just ignore you for once. sitting up straight, discomfort finds its way to the pit of your stomach, swirling around as you fidget with the bracelet around your wrist. his eyes watch your movements with an obsessiveness that startles him; thereâs no reason why he should be interested in the shape of your fingers, thereâs no reason why he should be interested in the way you keep brushing stray curls away from your face, and thereâs no reason why he should be interested in possibly fucking you when he knows for a fact that he is absolutely uninterested in you.
his disinterest runs so deep it spoils the taste of the sake, but he takes another swig anyway. the alcohol burns as it travels swiftly down his throat, and it just so happens that you glance over at him â innocuous, an attempt to gauge his annoyance level â as his throat bobs and your mouth dries at the sight.
you turn your face away quickly, a traitorous flush crawling slowly along your skin, unjustly warming your cheeks. inhaling deeply, you do your best to will the blush away to no avail. where the hell are rukia and rangiku? surely it canât take that long to grab snacks. youâre tempted to go find them, but you have a sinking feeling that it would turn you into a coward.
and you refuse to give that man any more ammo against you.
ITâS X (NOT) X YOU
what initially starts as a small get-together, quickly turns into a party; leave it to rangiku to liven things up, her laughter infectious and whimsical, flitting about like a persistent hummingbird as she encourages everyone to play drinking games with her. experience taught him better than to engage because despite his high tolerance, thereâs really no beating rangiku when sheâs on a roll.
but when you emphatically agree to play with the rest, fury rises in his chest; your audacity, it seems, knows no bounds â and, yes, he understands the hypocrisy in his critique. he just doesnât care.
the games are every bit as simple and ridiculous as you thought theyâd be, but as everyone seems to be in relatively good spirits, you play along. not normally competitive with things like this, you get into the swing of things when you win round after round.
cheers resound nearby at your success, but throughout the evening, you feel renjiâs stare and do everything in your power to not give in and look back at him. a tough feat to say the least, as you are always acutely aware of his presence; and when you do happen to sneak another glance, his legs are spread and you curse under your breath for finding that attractive.
foolish, you chide, so fucking foolish.
renji sucks his teeth as he feels a heaviness in his head; groaning loudly he swirls around what little sake he has left in his glass before finishing it.
âyou lose again,â rukiaâs voice is soft and teasing, but heâs annoyed and canât be bothered with talking to her right now. she pats his shoulder gingerly before standing up to head to the kitchen. his mind is a mess and he blames you for it completely.
âi donât fucking care,â he says gruffly to her retreating figure, not bothering to elevate his voice as heâs sure she heard him. and he really doesnât care; heâs trying to tell himself to calm down, but he canât.
the fault completely lies with you â of course it does, everything you do agitates every cell in his body. the reason is simple, and he hates that he doesnât want to admit it â heâs so undeniably attracted to you that it pisses him off. he takes in your appearance for the twelfth time that night, admiring the softness of your cheeks, the fullness of your lips, the way you seem entirely too animated as you laugh at someoneâs lame joke â and yes, he can tell itâs not funny from how your laughter dies down after a few seconds.
if he had better sense, heâd stop looking at you, but he canât now; he might blame the sake for this later.
the intensity behind his gaze is enough to bring an inextinguishable heat along your skin. itâs only unpleasant because it travels down to your lower abdomen and brings about an agonizing ache between your thighs. at first, you do the sensible thing and ignore it; but the longer he stares, the more you want to look over, until finally you canât take it anymore.
âiâll be back,â you mumble to the other guests, although you doubt they hear you with how rowdy everyone is being; the noise isnât unwelcomed, the distraction serves to mask your footsteps when you scurry from the living room to the back corridor, turning corner after corner until you find the bathroom.
a coward â thatâs what you are.
you barricade yourself in there without thinking, heart pounding loud enough to disorient you. after several long minutes, you splash water on your face and take a few deep breaths.
âi canât believe i ran away,â your voice is so soft you barely hear the words â almost as if youâre still in disbelief over the entire situation. thereâs something off about renji tonight; the tension between you was more palatable and tangible than normal.
even though you feigned nonchalance as best as you could, there were so many moments where you couldnât help but watch him too. pitiful. absolutely pitiful. thereâs no excuse for it, and yet you struggle to find one anyway.
as you look at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, you try to convince yourself to head back out there. sooner or later, people will realize that youâve gone missing â and rangiku is nosy enough and like a bloodhound when sheâs drunk. your time is incredibly limited now.
thereâs no reason for you to continue to avoid the inevitable, so you sigh and give yourself a small pep talk before heading back outside.
TRUTH X OR X âŚ
renjiâs mood doesnât improve at all; in fact, it worsens the moment ichigo sits right next to him. heâs not even sure why this sets him off, but even closing his eyes and counting backwards does nothing to keep him calm.
with slight difficulty, renji grits out, âwhat do you want?â
undeterred, ichigo stares at renji pointedly, voice steady as he says, âyou could go after her, you know.â
again, renji sucks his teeth loudly, arms folded against his chest, right leg bouncing slightly as he taps his foot on the floor. punching ichigo would be pointless, and then rukia would get involved and he doesnât have time to deal with the fallout from that so he keeps his hands to himself.
besides, his anger is obviously misdirected right now. he knows â he knows âbut he doesnât care, so he doesnât mince his words when he responds with, âgo after who?â through his peripheral, he can see ichigoâs patience has also reached its limit.
âyouâre not that stupid, so stop acting like it.â
normally, renji would take the opportunity to mes s around and argue back and forth, but he might actually fight his friend if he doesnât walk away. so, he does; abrupt and without looking back, footsteps heavy on the hardwood floor.
maybe he just needs to change his approach with you, maybe talking things out would work in his favor; or maybe he needs to fuck you hard enough to purge you from his mind.
he lies to himself when he considers the first option, because itâs the second option that drives him to walk a little faster, head full of impossible thoughts as he wonders just how far youâd let him go.
when renji finally finds you, youâre in the middle of rebuffing the advances of an unfamiliar guest â theyâre drunk, handsy, and keep oscillating between giving you cheesy pick-up lines and berating you for rejecting them. but you stand firm, and your voice is relatively loud when you tell them, âfor the last fucking time, go away.â
under normal circumstances, renji would let you handle this yourself; he has no desire to play prince charming or be a knight in shining armor. youâre more than capable, and heâs seen the way you fight and argue to defend yourself â but, itâs when they place a wandering hand on your hip that he loses sight of all of that.
a brief moment passes, where your blood boils as you contemplate how best to kick their ass, but you never get the chance. a rather large shadow hovers over you both, but you already know who it is without having to look properly.
renji is a force to be reckoned with on a good day, but heâs at his fucking limit right now.
he doesnât ask, doesnât give any options for retreat, doesnât say a word when he yanks them off with a brute strength that surprises even you.
now, can he really be blamed for throwing them into the neighboring wall hard enough to make a noticeable hole? and is it really his fault that the drunk can hardly walk as they clutch their broken arm while murmuring something unintelligible, something that renji takes as a sign of them wanting a repeat demonstration?
consequences be damned, he gives the drunk a lethal look before they scramble away in fear.
âloser,â he says loud enough for them to hear, but they donât double back or even try to go toe-to-toe with the hot-headed lieutenant. you watch, half-amused and half-impressed with the unnecessary machismo, but still, you know better than to chastise him right now, especially when your heart sputters out of control from his proximity.
ââŚthanks,â you say, a faint flush on your cheeks, voice soft, head fuzzy when you realize that renji â aka mr. âiâll fight you on everything any day of the week unprovoked for no reason other than to drive you crazyâ â saved you. unprompted at that.
you make the mistake of looking up at him, your nerves prompting you to take a small step back when you realize that the usual hostility that renji reserves for you specifically is nowhere to be found. in its place is something more unreadable â or, rather, you donât want to read into it for fear of being wrong.
renji steps closer, which makes you back up again until your back hits the wall and youâre no longer able to escape.
âwe need to talk,â he says suddenly, but you shake your head, non-verbally objecting to the idea, curls bouncing wildly with your exaggerated movements. since he knows heâs pressed for time, he grabs your face with his large hand and stops you from moving. âthat wasnât a request.â
swallowing rusty nails would be better than dealing with your conflicting feelings over renji right now, because heâs much too close to you and now youâre forgetting why it is you hate him in the first place. ironically, heâs in the exact same position. so far, heâs acted on impulse over you more times than he can count tonight, but he supposes thatâs to be expected â you are a wildcard, after all.
âwhat if i donât want to.â your response is clumsy, the words tumbling one after the other. âwhat if i want you to leave?â you donât actually mean that, but you throw it at him anyway, to see if maybe this was all a fluke, and maybe, just maybe heâll remember himself and you both can go back to fighting like usual.
he considers your question, goes so far as to release your face to wrap his hand around your throat instead. your sharp inhale and parted lips tell him all he needs to know.
with a slightly raised brow, he asks, âwell, do you?â
because if you do, heâll walk away right now. but he knows what your answer will be, he just has to drag it out of you. he squeezes your neck to remind you to hurry it up, and before you can answer him properly, he places his leg in between yours, pressing close enough that you roll your hips forward while whimpering softly.
he really didnât think any of this through, but luckily the adrenaline from it all wonât wear off anytime soon, so heâll improvise along the way. he spent most of the night dealing with a semi-hard cock that wouldnât listen to reason no matter how many times he tried to stop thinking about you. but now? all of that restraint goes out of the window, and before he can question it, he kisses you.
youâve kissed plenty of people in your life â some good, most were mediocre and uninspiring â but renji actually takes your breath away. everything about him commands all your attention; from the way his lips move against yours greedily, leaving behind burning kisses that make your nipples harden underneath your clothes â to the way he thrusts his tongue in between your plush lips, licking inside of your mouth hotly, igniting an inextinguishable flame deep inside of you.
he grabs your hip with his free hand, squeezing hard, fingers digging firmly. all the irritation from earlier dissipates completely, leaving you feeling lightheaded and needy; you grind against him recklessly, arousal dampening the front of your panties, clit sensitive as it rubs against the delicate fabric. his cock presses against you â thick, long, and hard â and you wonder if this is why heâs so angry with you all the time.
was it always that simple?
if you asked the question aloud, he wouldnât know what to tell you â itâs a combination of things, but mostly heâs an idiot; he knows that now, but likewise youâre an idiot too. you just donât realize it yet.
itâs renji who pulls away first, lightly panting, breath warm against your lips as he releases his hold on your neck. he doesnât know where he finds the strength to string together a coherent statement, but his voice is low and husky when he speaks. âanswer my question.â
you blink at him, completely in a daze, lips slightly swollen from all the kissing. âwh-what?â you donât remember what he asked you, and you donât care.
âdo you want me to leave?â
for some reason, you completely forgot that you told him that. you rub your lips together and run your hands along his chest. âno.â the answer comes out automatically, without hesitation, and thatâs all the encouragement he needs.
âgood.â
SAY X IT X LOUDER
he picks you up with ease, almost as if you weigh nothing; a small squeal spills out of you as you wrap your legs around his waist, and renji gives you a sly smile â one laced with mischief and an unspoken promise of whatâs to come.
youâre back in the bathroom again, this time sitting on the counter with renji standing in between your legs. his hands coast along your curvy hips and down your thighs. heâs touching you but heâs not touching you and itâs driving you crazy.
with hurried, eager hands you both undress, and for the umpteenth time you internally curse this style of uniform; still, it doesnât take too long before his hands are on you again, calloused palms rough and warm against your skin. he places a kiss on your jaw, then another on your neck right underneath your earlobe; each kiss he leaves behind distorts your common sense, makes you feel irrational and impatient. your hands are soft and well-practiced, stroking his stiff cock as his hips jerk forward from your touch.
he canât remember the last time someone had him this worked up, which pisses him off a little; because that means him fucking you once wonât settle things. at that thought, renji bites your neck and your startled yelp quickly morphs into a moan when he runs his tongue along the mark. he dips his hand in between your thighs, rubbing his thick fingers against your slit. a loud banging on the door has you looking over, and you canât remember if he bothered to lock it once you both were inside.
your attention nearly falters, but when he pinches your clit you buck your hips, a shiver shooting down your spine at the slight pain.
âeyes on me,â is all he says, seemingly annoyed that you would dare to focus your attention elsewhere, âalways keep them on me.â what he means by that, he doesnât know, but you take the command at face value and nod while swallowing. he slides a finger inside of your wet pussy, and while you initially wanted to keep quiet to avoid suspicion and to prevent anyone from intruding, but you canât now.
ârenji,â you breathe, fingers trembling as you hold onto the counter for support, he thrusts his finger in and out, quick and hard, before inserting another. you clench around him, hips rocking forward as he fingerfucks you and grinds his palm against your clit. you close your eyes and moan louder than you mean to, chest heaving, thoughts jumbled and incoherent. he scissors his fingers inside of you, but quickly removes them without prompting.
âfuck!â you open your eyes again and stare at him in disbelief. âwhy did you stop?â
he laughs darkly and grabs your face roughly, fingers pressing into your soft skin without remorse. âwhat did i tell you earlier?â everything about this situation is laughable. he gave you very specific instructions, ones he thought were easy enough for you to follow. for some reason your movements are sluggish, mind in a haze as you scramble to remember but nothing comes to mind.
as you open and close your mouth, looking every bit as adorable as you are alluring, he decides to show you a bit of kindness.
âget down.â his command comes swift, his patience practically nonexistent; precum glides down the head of his thick cock, but he ignores it for the sake of teaching you a lesson. you donât bother waiting for him to repeat himself and slide off the counter. âturn around.â
like a doll, your movements are dictated by renji with simple, short statements. nothing about that phases you, though; itâs all very exciting, so when you do turn to face the counter, you bend forward and lean over the counter. renji admires the roundness of your ass and slaps it hard.
again, you find yourself moaning loudly, without shame and not caring about the volume of your voice. surely the others wonât pay attention, as theyâre still very drunk and are entertaining themselves with more games. another slap on your ass has you grabbing onto the counter again, legs shaking, arousal dripping between your thighs in anticipation. if renji doesnât fuck you soon, you might actually die.
he knows heâs taking too damn long, but itâs much more interesting making you work for him. he rubs the tip of his cock against your puffy pussy, gliding it in between your slick folds, your moans sweetly wrapping around him once he pushes inside of you slowly. someone bangs on the door again, making you look over, anxiety quickly filling your head with unnecessary what ifs that almost command your full attention.
with narrowed eyes, renji grabs onto your hair, curls soft in his hand, and yanks hard.
âthe fuck did i say earlier?â
goosebumps travel down your arms as a different kind of awareness and clarity surges through you quickly. you blink at your reflection, watching the way he towers over you, his muscles hard and defined â sculpted from years of training and dedication to honing his skills. it hits you then, what heâs really asking you.
âto,â you swallow thickly, throat dry, âto keep my eyes on you always.â you say it all in one breath, gasping when he runs his tongue along the curve of your ear. you donât know how much more you can take, but you know if you complain, if you say anything he might stop altogether.
renjiâs smile is wicked and dark, his lips graze your earlobe, voice deep and gravelly, a huskiness that wasnât there before as he thrusts into you, burying his cock deeply.
âgood girl.â
he refrains from kissing you properly, instead pushing you down so you can lean over the counter again. your mind melts from it all, and youâre panting, heart beating faster and faster as he firmly places a hand on your back.
âyouâre squeezing me so tight,â he remarks thoughtfully, although you note the slight strain in his voice; as much as he tries to act like heâs not that affected by you, you know that isnât the case at all. your pussy is every bit as enticing and heavenly as he knew it would be; he pulls back and slams his cock into you all over again, filling you completely. you try to keep watching him in the mirror, but heâs fucking you like heâs angry with himself for being so attracted to you.
and he absolutely is. itâs a truth he fought against for so long that heâs given up on denying it now. your moans drip onto his skin like caramel, sticky and sweet, and when you say his name like that â your voice going higher and higher from the ferocity of his thrusts â he nearly loses his mind.
âfuck,â he says out loud, grabbing your hip roughly, your wetness coating the length of his cock, âyouâre taking me so well.â he knows you canât really answer him, and he likes that; youâre beyond caring at this point, instead focusing on the way his cock reaches a spot that has you bouncing your ass and fucking yourself against him. normally, renji would play around and edge you in retaliation, but heâs too far gone, completely under the spell of your pretty pussy, with how soft and tight it is.
youâre not sure how you got here, but youâre drowning in ecstasy right now. he instructs you to lift your leg to rest it onto the counter, pulling out momentarily to help you position and spread your legs further apart. he plunges his cock into you again, keeping his hips closer as he gives you shorter, frenzied thrusts. your head spins and you canât think straight, but that doesnât matter. all you care about is the way renji is angling his hips, rolling them forward to pound into your cunt roughly, balls heavy as they smack against your ass.
âoh, oh, oh.â you swear your life flashes before your eyes, because something possesses him, his strokes shorter, brutal, and frenetic. drool slides down your chin, your voice hoarse from how loud youâve been. youâre sure someoneâs heard you by now, but you donât care.
how can you?
with renji fucking you like this â merciless and possessive, fingers brusing your skin, almost as if he wants to make sure youâll be as obsessed with him as he is with you â your common decency, your morals, everything that makes you you, they donât exist.
all thatâs left is this burning desire to let him have his way with you for as long as he wants. thankfully, you have enough sense to not admit that out loud; who knows what kind smugness youâll be subjected to if renji knew.
but youâre pretty damn transparent about it, he can tell from the way you canât stop clenching your pussy around his cock, from how your pussy makes loud, lewd squelching noises â ones that heâll commit to memory so he can revisit them from time to time.
tears roll down your cheeks and you sob as you hold onto the counter as best as you can, back arching, hips rocking against him with a neediness you never knew you had. thereâs a tightening in your stomach and your pulse skyrocketing as a flash of white practically blinds you. he watches the way your pussy keeps swallowing the length of his cock, and you finally fall over the edge, orgasm suffocating you with its intensity.
your cunt flutters around him, gummy walls soft and hypnotic, an addiction he never thought heâd have; breathing heavily, his muscles tense and renji groans something that suspiciously sounds like your name. the thought alone makes your face burn and warms your chest in a way that doesnât make sense. and when he finally cums, he humps into you, cum thick and hot as it spills inside your pussy, mixing with your slick wetness. a completely messy affair, but he doesnât care â itâs not his bathroom, after all.
legs trembling, youâre limp and incapable of movement, whimpering and whining until he finally pulls out of you.
renji runs a hand down his face, feeling spent but more than satisfied. suddenly his shoulders arenât so tight and tense, and his mood is much more tolerable. you do your best to stand but almost fall â your legs are useless, turned to jelly because of the man behind you. he chuckles at that, then clears his throat once he realizes. he fully expected there to be a moment of awkwardness after, but it never comes. when he sees your face â lips bruised and swollen, face flushed, eyes glazed with a faraway look â he feels compelled to kiss you again. so, he does. itâs not sweet, nor is it tender, but it still makes your heart swell all the same. he holds you close as you wrap your arms around his neck, doing your best to keep standing, even though your legs are ready to give out.
you donât know exactly what any of this means, but you do understand him a bit better now. heâs terrible with expressing himself, but you kind of like that about him; and maybe this isnât the healthiest relationship, but life was uncertain and youâd take renji fucking you like itâs his last day alive over him openly hating you any day.
#it is done!!!! finally!!! i survived sora#fic request#bleach angst#bleach smut#bleach x reader#bleach x y/n#abarai renji x reader#abarai renji x y/n#abarai renji angst#abarai renji smut#renji x reader#renji x y/n#renji smut#renji angst#âi can change himâ đĽ´#pls no i can't be SERIOUS#y/n continues to be braver than any u.s. marine#y/n sippin that clown girl juice over this man and ykw? me too.#my man my man my man ⧠đđšŐŕ´#anyway ily sora i had fun writing this i hope u have fun aka suffer reading
105 notes
¡
View notes