#anyways as horrible as what Lou said was

[whatohitsonfirewelp]

Oh some of you are actually fucking horrible people.

In what world is it okay to degrade someone for their looks???

If you don’t like a character, an actor, a writer, anyone, fine.

But you don’t fucking degrade them for their looks???

[daisyblog]

“We listen and we don’t judge!”

Our Story Masterlist Summary: YN does the “We listen and we don’t judge” TikTok trend with Louis.

based on this request

Sitting next to each other as they sit comfortably on the carpeted living room foor, YN and Louis speak in sync. “We listen and we don’t judge!”.

Louis smirks at his sister as he waits for her to speak first. “Know when we were younger and your favourite football got kicked over the wall, and we could never find it?”. His eyes widened at the mention of his beloved football. “It wasn’t Lottie who kicked it over…it was me!”.

“What?! Why did you fookin’ blame Lottie?!”. Louis voice held annoyance as he thought back to that day.

“Uh uh…we listen and we don’t judge!”. YN gave Louis a sweet innocent smile.

Louis thought carefully at what confession he was going to reveal. “Oh I’ve got one…I found your diary in a box from Mums house and I’ve read it”.

“What the actual fuck Lou…you can’t-“. YN could feel the embarrassment appear on her cheeks at the thought of Louis reading her teenage thoughts.

“Remember Tiny…we listen and we don’t judge”. The innocent smile was returned to YN.

YN wondered how far she could go with these confessions without her overstepping the mark. “When you were on the X factor…I punched a boy in high school because he said One Direction was shit!”.

“Well…that’s a valid reason…no judgement from me Kiddo!”. Louis shrugged his shoulders as he didn’t see what was wrong with that.

“When I found out about you and Harry…I thought about ways to try and break you up”. Louis winced at the words he just spoke.

YN sat with her jaw hung in horror. “Louis! That’s fookin’ horrible!”.

“It was a second thought and it was because I was fookin’ angry…but I didn’t do it!”. Louis rambled trying to defend himself as his eyes pleaded for forgiveness.

“I wouldn’t have listened anyway…same as when I didn’t listen when you said I couldn’t sleep on your tour bus”. YN smiled in satisfaction as Louis gave her a look. “Heavy sleeper aren’t you?”.

Louis couldn’t hide his smirk. “You’re a cheeky fucker…and so is Harold!”.

“Chill out…we were only cuddling!”. YN winked towards her camera letting the fans know she wasn’t being completely truthful.

Tag List:

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats@harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite@kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour@bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @indierockgirrl@buckybarnessimpp @ashleighsss @jerseygirlinca @fake-coolbeans @itsmytimetoodream@treehouse-mouse @mrs-anna-styles211994 @macy-tpwk @mrs-anna-styles211994

[loveisfriendship]

Are you wifi?

Author’s Note: As a celebration of the return of my creativity. And as this is one of my stories which still gets a lot of love, I wanted to give "Are you Cinderella?" a part 2.

Can’t believe this one is from 2018. Time flies.

Enjoy!

Love,

Lis

A couple days after your spontaneous Pick-up-Line challenge, you were all on a lookout. While you and Danny were in a car together and Chin and Kelly as well. Steve was with Lou. You were all just talking about Valentins Day, and how horrible they went for most of you.

“Maybe Danny could have used some of the pick-up lines that we heard a few days ago.” Chin chimed in, making everyone laugh, you even more when you not only heard Dannys groan but saw him through his head back against the seat. 

“Please don’t remind them.” Danny said.

“Oh, I heard of the best ones.” Lou chimed in.

“I have some of my one, you know.” He adds, and all of you could hear the smirk in his voice.

“No, Lou. Now is not the time.” Danny retorts at the same time as you say “Oh please, tell us.” The other also encouraging him.

“My wifes favourite was `I'd like to take you to the movies, but they don't let you bring in your own snacks.’” Lou says, making everyone crack up.

“I like it a bit more smooth, so my favorite is ‘Is it OK if I follow you out of here? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.’” He continues, causing everyone to ohh and ahh.

“I heard a new one, from a friend the other night. ‘Your middle name must be Gillette. Because you're the best a man can get!’” Chin chims in.

“What? That’s really just awful.” Kelly replies, but laughs nonetheless.

“Hey Steve.” You say, making Danny groand already, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Yeah?” Steves answers.

“Know what's on the menu tonight?”

“What?” he says, and you can hear the Kelly can barely hold it together.

“Me-N-U.”

Everyone burst out laughing.

“Hey baby?” Steve says.

“Yes.” You answer, smiling and looking at Danny.

“Don’t look at me like that. I don’t want to hear it.” He says.

“Are you wi-fi? Cause I'm totally feeling a connection.” Steve says anyway.

While everyone still chuckles, Danny looks at you.

“What? Smile Danno. It’ll do you good.” You say, nudging his shoulder.

“You think the one I have would have helped me with Melissa?” he asks you, making you gasp.

“Please Danno, let us hear it.” Steve says, everyone being completely silent, waiting on Danny’s line.

“If I had to rate you from 1 to 10, I'd give you a 9, because I'm the 1 you're missing.” He finally says.

Everyone whistles and Lou says “That’s even smoother than mine.” Followed by many “wow Danny.”’s by the others.

You take his hand and look him in the eyes. “Danny… That line?” you asks, making him hum, looking at you. “That would have been 100% better than what you gave her.” You say, bursting into a laugh, while Danny tries to tickle you.

Taglist:@geeksareunique@fandomoniumflurry @rahma29417 @letsstarsfalling@fairchild21 @fungk17 @woodworthit666 @honestlyoriginalthing @evyiione@everygoodusernameistaken16@littlewhiterose@reincarnated-ghost@princess76179 @damedoctoroftardis

[miraquinsworld]

Well I have some more thoughts about BT break up.

To begin with, I don’t care what cast members or Tim said about that. I would be weird if they say something like “Oh, don’t worry! They will end up together!” or “No, we actually plan them to make things up in the next episode”. Like of course they will say about the final break up and Lou quitting the show! Otherwise it would ruin all of the intrigue! Don’t forget that we have two more episodes! It’s not over.

Also everyone can agree that this break up felt rushed and all of nowhere and if they leave the story like that it would be horrible writing. Unless this would be explained in the next episodes. Like maybe it was only the beginning of new arc. We saw it with Madney, we saw it with Bobby and Athena, we saw it with Henren in season 1! Break ups can be part of relationship and it’s okay.

This arc can be a perfect tool to fight against bi stereotypes. That bi people always want to experiment and explore. Maybe writers want to give Buck a beautiful speech about how damaging these kind of stereotypes can be. May be Buck will try to convince Tommy that not all bi people are like this.

Anyway I think we shouldn’t criticise the show until the season is over. But if they let this story to fade like that I won’t watch season 9. Because in this case It will be a bad writing for sure.

[ashkav]

Rainy, her baby, and the Laughing Samurai theory

So Shioli Kutsuna's character has been revealed! Rainy, a pregnant woman on the crew of the Magellan who has the ability to cause rain fall (Shioli said this during the Tokyo Games show, though I can't find the relevant clip.)

several very interesting things are said during this cutscene, and when combined with what else we know from the promo materials and also from DS1, I think they can be combined to form some ideas. And boy, do I have Ideas about Rainy.

First, the foundation, all (very few) info from previous media that I think is relevant to Rainy.

a) The Songs:

We have so far had three songs about babies/ children in the promo material. Lou's lullaby twice, both connected to Higgs, on the electric guitar and then again with Troy Baker singing it very ominously. And then the broken down rock-a-bye baby tune right at the very end of the state of play announcement trailer during the credits. Obviously, songs to do with children that are usually happy or peaceful now inverted from comforting to something scary and unsettling = Bad Things are going to happen to the kids.

But Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head is not a song that has been made sad or unsettling - yet.

I absolutely feel this song is going to be called back to at a climatic moment in the story, possibly at Rainy's own death, possibly as the last thing she says to her baby. The song itself seems like a bad omen to sing to a fetus, what with Rainy's name being what it is and the lyrics being about perseverence through hardship - difficult not to instinctually think Rainy and her baby are about to suffer some pretty awful trauma that ends with one or both of them 'falling' to the Beach.

Raindrops keep falling seems very likely to continue the same pattern of a comforting song for children introduced at a peaceful time only to warp into horrifying due to a climatic moment - the only reason it hasn't already been warped is because the audience has to hear it the first way first and it didn't exist in the last game to be set up the same way, unlike the other two.

b) 'I just can't wait.'

This is a pretty innoccuos statement for a pregnant woman to say irl, but within the game verse, Rainy is literally the second woman we've ever seen who has expressed an actual desire to have children.

Let's very quickly run through the list of female characters who have children in DS1:

Lucy, Sam's wife who killed herself because the visions she was getting from Sam's DOOMS afflicted baby were so horrible she couldn't continue living.

Lisa Strand, Sam's bio mother who became brain dead early on in her pregnancy due to a car accident and who we never hear from, even in supplementals, and is shot in the head by Sam's dad.

Bridget Strand, Sam's adoptive mother who revived him after accidentally killing him and kept him to raise out of guilt, traumatising Sam so badly throughout his life that he suppresses his memories of her and doesn't really want to speak to her even as she lays dying of cancer in front of him.

A whole host of unnamed still-mothers, impregnated after brain-death and farmed for the BBs they produce.

and finally, Lockne, who actually wanted a baby not because of the baby itself, but because she wanted some part of her lover to live on even after his death. Due to issues with her uterus, she is incapable of becoming pregnant, and even when her twin agrees to surrogate, the baby and Mama both die in a terrorist bombing at the hospital.

(for the purposes of this list I am not counting the mountaineering couple, since they don't matter except to create stakes for that one timed mission.)

There's a pretty clear trend here - almost no one wants children, and those that have them are in incredible danger of losing the child or themselves. This makes sense in a world where hospitals no longer exist and the very act of childbirth is incredibly dangerous and mostly everyone is pretty much asexual anyway, so it's a massive outlier that Rainy expresseses wanting the baby, even if it would be a normal thing to say in our world.

Maybe this is a stretch, but I can't help but feel there's some thematic parrellel here between Rainy, who wants her baby to be born very much, and still-mothers, who are made pregnant but never truly give birth and who cannot ever consent - not that they don't consent, but that they are incapable of consent in the first place. All their children, except three (Sam, Lou, and the BB Coffin managed to save), die in the womb. They're always bridges and never babies, never born, never really living or dead. They are nearly unanimously incompatible with the concept of life, or growth, just the same as their still-mothers are incompatible with the idea of wanting them.

More on this later.

C) The Samurai

The Samurai is visibly pregnant. There is only one pregnant character in the cast (so far). There HAS to be a connection here.

This is not the first time we've seen a visibly pregant character do crazy insane shit - Sam, for instance, is 'pregnant' with Lou's glass womb for the whole first game and probably the second too, and he does some intense stuff.

The circumstances with Rainy are different though. For one, her womb is made out of the squishy human stuff, not bulletproof glass, and she can't take it off. Rainy doesn't seem particularly athletic either: in her and Tomorrow's intro, where they're stacking boxes into a shelf, she moves slowly and with effort, not to mention that the Samurai is taller than even Higgs (Troy Baker is 6'3), where Rainy is shorter than Sam (Norman Reedus is 5'10, and Shioli Kutsuna is 5'3). Plus, the Samurai suit has no way to see out of it, so even if somehow it augmented her height, strength and speed, she still wouldn't be able to see what she was doing.

It is very, very unlikely that she is the one inside the mech suit. No, instead, I think it's her baby in there.

Sounds insane, but listen: we've already seen Higgs' robots have some connection to BT's, floating like they do and having visible strands leading up like they do and potentially being vessels for them. Dollman is explicitly stated to have been a normal adult human person who used his medium powers to possess the doll and got stuck there when his human body died. Even Lou seems to have the ability to haunt her old pod, with the ghostly winged BT form and tentacles. The technology and precedent for soul-to-machine connection exist, the Samurai makes baby noises, it looks pregnant. And thematically...

Remember that earlier section, where I was talking about Rainy wanting the baby vs still-mothers who cannot want and produce babies who cannot live? Also remember how parents with DOOMs very often pass the trait onto their children, and that an adult with DOOMs (Sam) and a BB with DOOMs (Lou) connected through the umbilical made some very strange things happen?

I think that Rainy's desire for a child interacting with both of their DOOMs will produce something very strange. I have two major theories about what could happen to get the baby in the machine:

The baby and mother cannot both be on the same plane at the same time. Rainy's baby suffers some strange accident while Rainy is giving birth (maybe she gives birth as the Magellan is travelling through the Beach?), and the connection between them becomes like a still-mother and BB, but only in some aspects. The connection between the living and dead is swapped constantly between mother and fetus instead of mother alone tethering to the world of the dead. Metaphorically, you could compare this to a Drawbridge, evolving out of the previous Bridge-style that BRIDGES created with the still-mothers. With Rainy and her baby, either side can be 'drawn up', and the burden is shared between them. The tragedy of this is that even though both Rainy and her baby survive, they can never truly meet or meaningfully interact, as one must always be on the Beach when the other is in the living world. Possibly this could be made more extreme, where instead of being seperated in mind only they are also unable to interact physically - one must physically be in the Beach if the other is in the land of the living. We know it's possible to live on the Beach because Tomorrow confirmed it, even if Sam described it 'like hell', so maybe they build the baby a suit that it's pod can slot into to help it survive the time it has to spend on the Beach - we know BBs are quite smart and have an abnormal amount of dexterity and also increased senses that allow them to see BTs, so it could be possible that the BB became skilled at piloting the suit because it was literallly fighting for it's life on the Beach. This would thematically mirror Bridget/Amelie, or at least the lie that Bridget/Amelie told the world - that Amelie was Bridget's daughter who couldn't be removed from the Beach.

The baby is psychic pre-birth. The baby is believed to have died inside Rainy because it stops moving and scans show that it's funtionally brain dead - plot twist being that the baby is alive, but has just accidentally astral projected into a machine. The Samurai is an upgraded version of Higgs' BT robots that either Higgs built or Drawbridge built after they'd studied some of his work, and the pregnancy bump is an unconcious change that the baby makes to the robot, like how Dollman can minorly alter his appearance when he's mad.

I think this would give Dollman an interesting double - adult in a small, powerless puppet vs baby in a big, deadly, hypermobile machine. Brain vs brawn, thought vs impulse. It even fulfills Jester vs Sage if we want to get Jung's archetypes in here, what with the Samurai laughing and Dollman being an expository friend you carry with you, like Mimir from God of War.

The second one is the one I feel is most likely - it ties in so neatly and honestly I'm not too sure that Rainy would survive her time swapped out on the Beach if whatever the baby samurai was fighting was strong enough to make it so skilled against Higgs, even if there does seem to be a community there to help her.

Whatever ends up being the case, Rainy absolutely definitely is not going to have a 'normal' baby. There is no such thing as a normal baby in Kojima land.

[minsu-the-cowardly-human]

UglyDolls shipping chart

Whoo boy so this orginal chart has been since deleted but people have uploaded their versions of it so I frankensteined this together + added Nolan. The explanations and list of the ships will be below the cut

OTP:

Lou x Ox: Listen I know Ox calls him like a brother but in my headcanon he only says that because he has #interalizedhomophobia. Anyways, I just love love the idea of them being toxic but also sweet together...idk chat they got somethin' to 'em!! I'm just like that one cow pic that's "man" like...wow they are so terrible together!!! I ship Ribbun what do you expect, lol

Lou x Moxy: Ok this one I can actually explain with real words a bit more. Firstly I like how in the Ugly Truth song I know this is apart of the whole manipulative stuff or whatever BUTTT i do like he says she makes him tongue-tied and calls her pretty before the back-up singers go in. I know, I know that's the point...but I mean...tongue-tied is an inherently romantic phrasing for me. Also I LOVE how Moxy is in the crowd smiling like an idiot as she's listening to him call everybody else ugly and she's the only one still smiling when her and crew gets the spotlight on them. I don't think she's stupid, considering none of the rest of them are smiling at this point AND she starts frowning once his "prettttttyyyyyyyyy" goes on for a bit..long..to the point she knows he's not being serious yk? Idk I just..love the idea of her being like a fangirl over his appearance, at least, and him finding it cute. Idkkk chat!! IdkkkK!!!

Like:

Tuesday x Kitty x Lydia: Idk I like the idea of them being poly together :3

Mandy x Kitty: Idk maniuplative girlboss toxicity yes yes. I chose Mandy and Kitty specifically because Kitty seems to be the leader of the pack of the spy girls/the most outwardly mean. I wanna see Mandy make a "not like other girls" meme with her and Kitty and Kitty gets on her about it before she realizes how pretty Mandy looks :>

Mandy x Nolan: They're both outcasts/"ugly", maybe they could get together or at least be friends!

Lou x Nolan: Nolan fawning over Lou and the first scene at the academy where Nolan is like "wait you criticized us because you love me?" and then Lou is like "yes" *looks away n back* "I love all of you" like...idk I think they could be cute together

Wage x Uglydog: Idk just a thought I had during the movie when Wage was getting on his ass about trying to rizz up everybody and failing. Horribly. Maybe she could rizz him up idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Moxy x Lucky Bat: Whoo I don't know just the way he talks to her during the tea scene and the way she kisses Ox on the cheek and pats his shoulder at the end of the first song makes it feel like to me he's getting friendzoned by her. Maybe I'm looking too much into things but that's the vibe I get. Plus idk...they could be kinda cute together...

Like/Neutral:

Babo x Lou: I don't know I like the tiny micro interaction they have in the Ugly Truth song. I don't have much of an excuse for this one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Babo x Wage: I like the idea of her coming home to her supportive hubby :3 idk it just clicks in my brain

Neutral:

Ox x Moxy: Idk it just doesn't click with me. Maybe it's because while searching for Lou x Ox stuff I saw someone mention that Moxy and Ox are "related" because the kids are related even tho it's never said in the movie. Maybe I see them more as friends. Idk. I respect it though and I think it's dumb to think they're related, if we're going by that logic you couldn't ship anybody cuz they're all made in the same factory. Edit: Got the reason wrong but I still think it's stupid to think it's bad to ship them. More info here:

Mandy x Moxy: Idk again it just doesn't click with me. I get the appeal 100% since Moxy is the first one to validate her for wearing glasses. But I dunno it feels weird for Moxy to say her glasses makes her who she is instead of her..personality? Idk. Maybe I'm being petty but it doesn't click for me. Respect it though.

**Edit: Ox x Lucky Bat: Damn I forgot these fuckers. Anyways, they're..alright. I like their colors though. Idk for me there's not enough there for me to ship them

Not Really:

Lou x Tuesday: He doesn't pay much attention to her. It feels like a hopeless fangirl falling for her favorite member of a boy band (which is fitting since Lou is voiced by Nick Jonas from the Jonas Brothers lol). Idk it doesn't seem Lou cares much about the spy girls unless they can do something for him, which is fine but I don't see the appeal personally. Respect those who do tho.

Lou x Mandy: .....okkkk listen ok I can't say shit about people who ship this or why I don't ship it because I ship fuckin Lou x Nolan and Lou x Moxy ok. I'm no stranger to shipping Lou with somebody he calls ugly lol is what I'm saying. But idk...Mandy doesn't seem to like him very much and he certainly doesn't like her but there's no small moment of something for me to ship them, like the "i love all of you" scene with Nolan or Moxy being a tiny fangirl. To me, it doesn't click. Respect those who do however. Again, I am a big rarepair/crackshipper I uh can't say shit about how much a ship makes sense to me lol.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV Musings - Justice for Claudia (she deserved better) ❤️👸🏼👸🏽👸🏾❤️ - S1

Everything that's ever happened to Claudia in her whole life is unfair and effed up, because my daughter has suffered more than Christ in the books, film, and tv show. 😩 This is not about seeing things in bad faith, it's about seeing things from CLAUDIA'S perspective, how SHE FEELS about her place in life, based on the way she's been treated and the things she's gone through & things she's seen happen to herself & the people she loves.

1) abandoned by her biological father when Claudia was born (mom died in childbirth)

2) grew up poor & abused as a child with her "mean ole auntie who beat her cuz no one said she couldn't")

3) watched her biological aunt die horribly, burned to death "But when Auntie came back, she got stuck on the other side and brought the fire back with her."

4) turned into a killing machine by "two hell demons," without her full knowledge/consent (she was unconscious). Daddy Lou's her favorite but he's "smothering;" and Uncle Les and her have a lot in common but he's "crotchety"--the mean ole uncle rather than the mean ole auntie ("when I'm tired, I'm not so kind!"). She sleeps in Louis' coffin until she's finally weaned enough to get a coffin & bedroom of her own; and immediately tries to draw boundaries ("you have to knock first, out, out! OUT! ") and have some independence, to little avail.

5) forever too-young, 14 for the next 30+ years. When she tries to dress her age and not like a little kid, Lestat chides her for wearing clothes he didn't buy for her, and the white racist wenches call her a "Darkie playing dress-up in the dark!"

6) AMC!Claudia accidentally kills her first love Charlie, forced by Uncle Les to watch him burn while he puts her in Chokehold #1 "stop squirming, and watch...his face as it melts;" while Daddy Lou did eff all to stop him

7) the only companion she has left is her diary ("friends of last resort"), and in her depression she turns to self-harm, burning herself

8) does what Uncle Les taught her to do and killskillskills (not just collecting trophies, she's also tryna create her own fledgling/companion, but she's too small so they all die "gaspin!"); "you better hope and pray you taught me how to clean up good." Spoiler: Les didn't teach her jack, cuz the 56 Floaters are found anyway. But Les still has the nerve to put her in Chokehold #2, while Louis stands there doing eff all to stop him--"you gonna let him do this to me!?" She also feels violated when Les admits to having read ALL of her diaries (Lou read the one Les gave him), and Les accuses her of "ungratefulness" when she's just venting to her private journal. "I'm never gonna forget what happened here. I hate you both!").

9) The 56 Floaters send the cops a'knockin, and Lestat (her Blood Father) tells her "you are a mistake" -- "an anvil (pulling us down)." She feels she's been abandoned by yet another father figure who never wanted her "you wanted her, you fix her!"--and tells Lou he's been cucked for years as Les cheats on him with a flat-arsed white woman ("he's gotten tired of us"), but Lou just stands there doing eff all to speak up or fight back "he treats us like sh!t and you take it, why is that?!" (TBF, Lou did cuss Les out for calling her a mistake, "how about you STFU?!", but again: CLAUDIA felt that Louis didn't do enough to defend us/them/HER, and that's all that matters)

10) runs away from home to find herself/learn about vampiric nature, but was forced into hiding cuz of segregation, sneaking around libraries & campuses--(pretending that her Black mother was the maid/servant/slave who'd abandoned/left her child to wander around unsupervised)--just to gain access to White-Only learning spaces, cuz ever since Slavery times, white people didn't let Black people learn to read & write or educate themselves, since knowledge=power.

11) Bruce, the first vampire she meets away from home saves her from the white racists, and they bond over having abusive European Makers ("you and I are running from the same thing then"). Bruce actually encourages her book-reading, but only recommends European Etiquette books--rules on "manners, how to be a nice young lady." Offended, ofc she refuses, only for Bruce/Killer to turn around and viciously rape & beat her, breaking her bones & stuffing her under the floorboards to assault her over & over again for a whole week straight for being "rude" to him; before effing off when he got bored & "tired of your gloomy face."

12) comes back home after 7 years to find Louis mourning his permanent estrangement from his sister Grace, and is convinced that the only reason Daddy Lou ever wanted her around was to be his substitute sister (WE ofc know this isn't true, but SHE doesn't know). She tries to talk Louis into being her (travel) companion in Eastern Europe to "meet vampires worthy of your love!," only for Lestat to butt in and show his whole entire arse.

13) she apologizes to Loustat very calmly & politely & maturely, Lestat resents her for hurting Lou by leaving them (ofc Claudia doesn't know she'd hurt Les' feelings by leaving, too ("turn a betrayal into an opportunity")), and is also scared/threatened that she'll take Lou away from him for good. So he refuses her apology, insults her intelligence & self-education & mocks that she can never get a college degree, calls her a "destitute little girl destined to live an inconsequential little life," mocks her for being raped in the "American hinterland," and throws "how did Charlie taste? like the love you'll never know?" in her face for good measure. Escalating the situation to the point of no return, Les then viciously attacks her with Chokehold #3, and commences to beat the dog snot out of Louis right in front of her when Lou tries to defend his daughter from her attacker. She tries to defend Lou and fight Les off of him, but "godlike strength" Lestat flings her "built-like-a-bird" body off of him, throwing her into the furniture and giving her a bleeding head injury. Les drags Lou out of the house by his effing jaw, and Claudia chases after them, tryna sacrifice herself to protect her Daddy Lou by begging "Uncle Les, let him go, it's me you want!" Only for him to tell her to her face "it was never YOU!," confirming (for her) that he never wanted her. She watches helplessly as Les savagely bites Lou & drains him (ie: vampiric rape) before flying Lou 2km into the effing atmosphere and "dropped him like an egg from an airplane," leaving her to pick up the pieces when Les effs off (in shame) to Algiers/Antoinette for the next 6 years.

14) Claudia becomes Louis' mother, hunting down animals to feed him, and teaching him how to walk again. For at least 3 years, she's the only one fit enough to clean up the absolute wreck Loustat had turned the townhouse into (both pre-/post-fight), and she's the only one who can protect them both if Lestat decided to finish what he'd started--let alone Bruce. She rejects Lestat's mea culpas for Louis, bravely answering the door to turn Les away; yeeting the keys to the Rolls Royce into the ether rather than stand by and let Louis be buttered up by Lestat's obvs lovebombing & manipulations. But all her efforts for nothing, when Louis finally folds & lets Lestat return to the household.

15) Fed up, she declares that she's emancipated herself as NEITHER of Loustat's child--"I'm your sister, or there's the door." Rather than humbling himself to have a sincere heart-to-heart & apologize to his daughter (who's obvs still hurting & traumatized from everything she'd gone through, seen him do, and is terrified that he'll do to them AGAIN), Lestat snipes at her, becoming increasingly macroaggressive "I am your Maker!" Unimpressed with Les' lovebombing ("He's trying. Teaching you piano, the chess board, isn't he?"), she's the constant reality check for Loustat about what happened "that night," "we leave the damage, so we never forget the damage;" refusing to give an inch as Les takes a mile & (inevitably) reverts back to his toxic behavior, "Lestat the vulnerable becomes Lestat the irritable becomes Lestat the controlling, you watch!" The ONE thing they agree on is that Louis' vegan diet makes them both feel "tolerated" & "looked down on" for wanting/needing to eat humans, agreeing to Lestat's rule to only eat humans from now on.

16) Meanwhile, Claudia's "Rule #4: Kill Antoinette" went completely ignored, Les insulting Claudia's intelligence by faking Ant's death & mocking Claudia for "liking souvenirs" by giving her Ant's severed finger. She's still following Les around as he cheats on Lou with Ant in Ponchatoula. Hoping this'll get Lou to stand up for them, and stop doing eff all to confront Les and get them out of there, she drags Lou along to make him see Lestant's affair & listen in as Les bad-mouths him & Claudia "she's a nasty little creature" to his white mistress and lets that "desperate trash" talk crap about them too, "You don't need her, and you don't need him. They don't appreciate you like I do."

17) Fed up with living in constant fear of Lestat & taking his anymore of his bullcrap, she wants to leave for Eastern Europe to find better vampires ("they can't all be like him (Lestat), or him (Bruce)"). Yet again, she unsuccessfully begs Lou to come with her cuz she's scared it's not safe for him staying with Lestat ("when he hurts you again--and he will!--come find me"), but Lou tells her "I'd just hold you back.... Hey, Sis. You don't need me. You think you do, but you don't. You're smarter now. You see trouble coming a mile away." So she runs away, on a NYC-bound train headed North to freedom (a la Harriet Tubman's Underground Railroad), giggling excitedly even as she's forced to hide in the back with the luggage cuz little Negro girls weren't allowed to ride the nice White-Only trains. Just as she thinks she's free, Massa Lestat chases her down like a "slave" he's caused nothing but "misery with no horizon." Again, he mocks her being raped, and threatens to do even worse and kill her if she runs away again, "back in your cage, sweetheart." Back home, he's the pater familias from hell who's verbally abusive ("finish the game!"), cussing from A to Z, mad at her for outsmarting him and mad at Lou for his "timid child rearing & compromise" & not being a disciplinarian who'd go upside Claudia's head like Les wants to.

18) Claudia's 100% done enduring life under Lestat's shingled roof, and ropes Louis into helping with her Murder Plot. She only tells him so much, cuz she knows Lou's unreliable AF, scared he'll fold & choose Lestat over her again. (book!Claudia doesn't tell Louis about the Murder Plot at all, and her Merrick diaries reveal that she hates Lou just as much as she hates Les. But AMC!Claudia is much more forgiving of Lou; she loves him & cares/fears for him, but she''s also tired of how whipped he is for Massa Lestat.) She constantly has to remind Louis to stay on track and to "wake up!" whenever he got those dreamy hearteyes at Lestat that means he's *this* close to calling off the whole plan. But Claudia knows what time it is, cuz she knows Lestat's gone & Turned Antoinette into a frikkin vampire who's been spying on them. He even tries to have his white mistress kill his Black daughter, saying she "should never have been made/born," and that "Antoinette will be much more agreeable to our life together!" But Claudia said "Lestat, you must think me an idiot!" and he was GAGGED when she got the drop on ALL of them, poisoned TF outta Lestat, stabbed his sidepiece like a kebab and crushed her head in like the ant she is, and wrote Lestat's dying words in his own blood! 👑

19) But she was right about Louis being a flake, so lost in the sauce and out of his effing mind that he commits the ultimate betrayal, putting her in Chokehold #4 to stop her from burning Les alive. 🤦 (book!Louis DID burn Les.) Instead, AMC!Louis' a lovesick idiot who puts Les in the dump to feast on rats & regain his strength (book!Louis dumped Les in the swamp where gators almost ate Les alive). 🤦 Louis & Claudia finally leave NOLA for Eastern Europe, where Claudia hopes things will get better them overseas.

20) But alas....

To be continued in Pt2 for S2, cuz I hit Tumblr's hyperlink limit. 🙄

[twopoppies]

Hi Gina. Hope you’re doing well. I just came back from the documentary and I think I’m alone in that I pretty much HATED it and I feel absolutely horrible for feeling that way. Yes, the first 1/4 was very emotional about 1D, Louis losing his mom and Fizzy, feeling lost. I really felt for him but for me I soon became very annoyed with how repetitive the narrative became. I have to say I think Charlie Lightening did an absolute disservice in getting Louis’ story across. There were the funny bits from fans and Louis but a great deal of the concert footage was of Louis’ back, which I get was to show the audience but for me it just didn’t work. I don’t feel he show cased how talented Louis is. And it just felt so contrived with the beach and lad scenes. The person I was with started laughing and whispered “who plays an electric guitar on the beach”? As for the kid, I did not feel any real connection between him and Lou. Something was off. Those did not feel like genuine parent child interactions and Louis seemed way over the top with him. Those were minor points for me though because I already had a hard time trying to get my head around where Charlie was trying to take us. Gina, I have to tell you I went with an anti and she came out saying what’s with all that fake sunset shit and said to me “I don’t know who that child is to him but that’s not his son” 😂😂😂 Anyways, to sum things up the anti I went with asked me would I rather see the documentary again or DWD which she knows I hated… and without missing a beat I said I’d rather see DWD over the doc. I love love documentaries but this just seemed like a PR implosion. I’m feeling so sad because I really was looking forward to it, even with all the bbg stuff and I appear to be the only one in the fandom who thinks Charlie Lightening missed the mark.

I’m so sorry you didn’t like the film. I’m sure you’re not the only one, but most people are afraid to voice unpopular opinions around here.

I think the bottom line is that Charlie was given a narrative to follow and that’s what we’re getting.

[weirdboi]

Lucifer lore/part 2/ -THIS MAY INCLUDE VIOLENCE BLOOD, MURDER ECT

If ur not comfortable with these pla leave

•Recovery

In Luci's brain a blurry picture was playing. It was showing some monster hands dragging a body of a child, slowly opening the child's mouth and putting it's arms in it. Suddenly, they woke up, all sweaty and shaking. Doctors were so surprised! Soon they dud some tests on Lucifer and later called his mom to pick him up. When Monica came she was so happy that her child is alright, but Luci still needed a lot time for recover. First, they needed to remember how to write and read again, then how to speak, how to walk, how to remember family members and loved once and other stuff. After ''full'' recovery Lucifer noticed something strange. They started feeling more angry and wanted to hurt ppl.

•Age 14

At this time Luci was a real teenage dirt bag. One day he woke up and saw hsi mom panicking in the living room and dad talking on the phone. They had no idea what was going on. But when they looked out of the window everything was clear. The neighbours broke down their gate. How could they! And this qas not the first time neighbours would do such a thing. Lucifer was getting bullied at school 24/7 . Plus the neighbours didn't like the family cause of Monica being German. Months passed by and in the end luckily, through all the courts and payings, the gate was finally back and now stable. But that doesn't mean that neighbours were being any nicer. In fact they were even worse! Because of that horrible behaviour Luci made a plan how to make 'em pay. One night Luci got a lighter from her father...

And burned a bit of the Woods that were near the house. Soon everything was on fire! Neighbours called the fire fighters who slowly started putting the house down. In 2 am police took Lucifer and Monica to the station. In the court it was decided for Lucifer and his family to move somewhere else. After those news Octavius yelled the hell out on Lucifer and told them really shitty stuff. They had a week to choose where are they going. After calling family members and checking the money situation, Monica and Octavius decided to move to America.

Luckily Monica's sister lived there and paid for everything. The next week they got their card and papers and moved away.

•Someone special

Days went by and Luci really felt like home. He knew English really good, didn't have problems with understand and finding places and no problems with the crowds. But, in school he was quite a trouble maker, with great grades tho. Only grades were getting him out of trouble. After few school switching cause of big fights and sending a Lot of kids to hospital, Luci finally started middle school, but this time.. with Moe! They went to same middle school and Moe was so happy that his closest cousin isn't that far away anymore. One night when Luci was getting home from detention he heard some noise. He was curious and decided to follow it. She got to the place where noise was coming from and it turns out it was a shark... It was all beaten up. Luci came near it to help.

"Oml Are u alr??"

"Y-yes it's just a scratch..."said shark

"Umm don't worry I have sum... bandages if that is gonna any how.. "

"Nono no u Don't have-"

"Oh don't be silly, u need help and I can help u"- said Luci i and started helping the shark out. After that he asked the shark where he lives and Shark told him he can come yo the docks near "Molly's café". As he said that Luci took shark and started carrying him. On the way they talked about a lot of things.

"And I didn't catch ur name..?"

"It's Lucifer. And urs?"

". . . Lou. . ."

"Ok so we're here. U sure u can continue on ur own?"

"Yup plus u already did enough. I need to prepare for new school tomorrow anyway."

"Which school?"

"Ahhh "Arnold junior high"?"

"Wait-THAT'S MY SCHOOL!!!"

"Really!? Really...cool.."

"But why school on the ground?"

"Well tomorrow Starts that *swap up* day we have here. It's about sharks going to earthlings schools and earthlings go to our water school woth crystals."

"Which crystals?"

"Well when animals turn 11 years old each one gets a special crystal that has a power that gives us waterlings legs and you earthlings fins."

"Why didn't I get my own one then?"

"Well maybe it's just late nothing else... Any how I'll see u tomorrow then, bey..."

"BEY!!"-she said and Lou swam away. The next day Luci was really hyped for seeing Lou. They came to school all happy and were waiting for him. Lou soon came. Luci was really pleased to see him. The day went by and it was time for geography. A teacher of geography was a real bitch and didn't like anybody sept rich kids. She caught Lou and Luci talk. She started yelling at them and told how they need to tell their moms to come.

"But Ma'am I-"

"Don't u "Ma'Am bUt" ME!!! WHO GAVE U THE RIGHT TO TALK IN MY CLASS!!!

"But miss I-"

"U what!?"

"...I don't have a mother..." -said Lou quite sad.

"Oh...well then...Call ur father or whatever.."-she said and Lou got out of the class. Luci asked if she can use the bathroom cause of her period and the teach let her. When she got out she looked for Lou and heard someone in male bathroom.

It was Lou. He was crying cause of this shit. Luci entered

"Hey u good bro?"-he asked and hugged him

"Y-yes dw.."

"I am so srry for -"

"It's ok...not the first time won't be the last.."-he said on the edge of the tears.

Luci hugged him again and told him he can cry all he wants. The rst of the class they spent in the bathroom, crying amd comforting. For the next few months everything was amazing. Lou and Luci really became close. One night they decided to run from home and meet up. They did so, both escaped during the night and had an amazing time. But when they stopped at one lil shop the owner called the cops because of vagrancy.

"Shit! We gotta go!" -said Lucifer as they started running. They ran for a while and decided to stop at one lake.

"Wow...that was a close one... wasn't it?"

"Yeah..."

"Welp at least we escaped am I right?"

"Yeah..."-he said as they continued talking. They talked for a while when suddenly they saw some light. It was the car. It was near them so they both jumped into the water, before it was too late. Luckily, the car didn't get them. Lou looked out of the water.

"Is it safe?" -asked Luci swimming

"Yeah, I think it is"-he saud and they both got out of the water all wet.

"Are u cold?"-asked Lou Luci

"Nah broo I'm good :D And u?"

"I'm ok, as a shark u get used to it. But I know earthlings get cold when they are out of the water."

"Nah I'm good"-he saud as they both set down. They continued talking while drying. And out of nowhere... Lou took off his jacket and gave it to Luci. Lucifer blushed and their eyes went wAcKy.

"Ummmm u good?"-asked Lou suprised

"Yes, certainly. I do this when I'm happy."

Times passed and their friendship was growing and growing.

Hope u enjoyed!!! :D

[enchantedlandcoffee]

Hey!

9 and 20 for the WIP ask game?

Hey Hani! Thanks for the ask <3 I'm going to go with my YouTuber AU for this one.

9. What is your favourite dialogue you've written so far?

Probably this one between Louis and Zayn

“Come on, Zayn. I don’t know why you need me here. I mean, you’re just going to ditch me for your ‘Barista guy’ as soon as you meet him anyway. Then I’ll be all alone.” “You’re not going to be alone, Lou. Like I’ve said a million times, Nick’s here. Ed’s here. You know, people you hang out with other than me.” “Yes but they weren’t the ones who forced me to dress up. I’m wearing suspenders, Zayn. Suspenders. Who wears suspenders in 2011?” “You apparently. Hey, you’re the one who chose to come as Jack. All I said was that it’s a fancy dress party. You could have come dressed as literally anyone else.” “Says the guy who threw on a green cloak and called it a day.” “Yes well I wanted to make a good impression, okay Lou? I really like this guy.” “Having a crush makes you mean.” “I know, I know. I’m a horrible best friend. Now, do you see anyone dressed in a Hogwarts cloak?”

20. Share 3 images that would fit into a moodboard for this chapter/fic

[seekforwarmth]

helloooo, lou! 💙

i have seen how much hate the creators in this fandom get. and i have been feeling really anxious to post whatever i had in mind. but there is first time for everything, huh?! 🥶

it's so nice to change a whole recipe to match your friend's preferences. and cook for her. it's like not a lot of people do it anymore, respecting others' wishes and decisions. 🗣️

have you been to other concerts? 🧞‍♂️

actually, the miscommunication was my fault. i reread your last reply and realized that you said "rule out". i didn't know the meaning of this phrase until now, so i checked it out and now i know what you meant. but do people go hiking/biking/etc on dates? i would never... 🐳

english is not my first language as well, and a lot of times the language barrier leads to miscommunication. but your english is amazing and i think you are great with words. 🦋

louis is such an awesome person. his interests and visions are really wonderful. it's so good you both have so many things in common. 🌀

okay, i have a funny story. when 1d formed as a band, i was eleven years old. my classmates were obsessed with them. so i was like "i won't be like the other girls" and i was showing disinterest every time someone was talking about them (but at the same time i was secretly blasting more than this. the only reason i love that song that much, was because of niall and louis' solos). and i listened to their songs occasionally on the music tv channels (their singles). and for the time the band was still touring and making albums, i just didn't vibe with them, and even think about them. when zayn left the bad, i read it somewhere and that was all. but when the next year mind of mine came out, i fell in love with his voice. so, all in all, i would say zayn. i have been listening to his music for years and i just have really soft spot for him in my heart. 🫐

my questions for the day: what is your favorite tv series? can you share one fun fact about you? 🖌️

hope you have a lovely day,

- your secret valentine 🦕

p.s. don't let the last emoji betray your vison for me, because in fact i'm quite short.

hi valentine!! 💓

listen, don’t think of any of that yet. there are horrible ppl around but i still believe there are some good ones left. i understand feeling anxious, trust me that i always feel that way whenever i’m posting something new, but don’t let the haters win. their goal is to stop us from creating so if we do stop, they’ll win, and they don’t deserve to win. if you truly feel uncomfortable sharing anything, then it’s fine too. at the end of the day, creating something in the fandom is supposed to be fun and if you’re not having fun, then it loses its purpose.

anyway. yes, we’ve been best friends for almost 13 years so i just want her to be happy and comfortable. :) and she does the same for me, like every time i visit her house, she makes sure to buy me tacos from the stand i like.

last year i only went to see Aurora and to the fest where Niall performed, this year i’m going to see a mexican artist called Yuridia and in june i’m seeing Louis. 🤧 have you been to concerts lately or are you planning on going to one soon?

no worries!! tbh i sometimes use verbs that i’m not sure abt but i’m too lazy to google lol but it’s fine. idk if there are ppl who go hiking but i’ve seen ppl who go skating ???

omg you’re way younger than me lol 1d came out when i was starting uni lol but your story is very cute, and tbh it’s very understandable bc i feel like as teenagers we either want to fit in or we want to be unique. at the end, i’m happy that you found someone who resonated more with you. Zayn is a great artist and he seems like such a sweet soul, i want to squeeze his cheeks lol

my favourite tv series is mindhunter, and i’m still sad we got only two seasons of it :( i love jonathan groff so much. idk what could be a fun fact abt me… like, i’m just thinking abt facts but idk if they’re any fun 😭 had to ask for some help but you probably know how much i love fics, and i when i write for a fic fest, i read the rest of the fics (which i thought it was the norm but apparently it isn’t), so my fun fact is that i read every blff fic the day it was posted, maybe with the exception of the 100k one bc it took me three days but the rest of them i read them on each day they were published. and now my brain is fried hdjdhdjdhd

thank you, valentine! i hope your day is awesome as well. 🤗 (and i’m quite short as well so we’re twinning!) <3

[annelouiseoosterhuis]

you’re pretty. real pretty.

anne-louise short-circuited. first, she froze, mouth hanging open slightly. then, the blush already on her face from her previous embarrassment deepened to a hot, scarlet red, and crawled up from her neck to the apples of her cheeks and up to the tips of her ears. a hesitant smile flickered over her face, almost as if she was glitching in real time. she never took compliments well. she’d hate to sound conceited, as she never thought of herself as pretty despite fitting into the conventional beauty standard, but she was used to drunk customers commenting on her appearance in a sometimes sweet, but usually crude way, or if they were trying to butter her up after she cut them off for the night. a part of her, deep within, was still that awkward girl in middle school, despite being halfway through her thirties. little annie-lou had suffered through her classmates calling her weird and ugly. she suffered through boys pretending to ask her out, just to laugh in her face when she said yes, or mean girls in school handing her a note that they said came from her crush of the month, but in reality said crush had no idea what she was talking about after approaching them and often got offended that the weird girl with two moms would dare to think they’d like her.

so, yes, she had some scars that had yet to fully heal. that left her sputtering when someone complimented her in any other capacity beyond ‘wow, your style is so cool and witchy!’ or ‘i love that stitchwork, can you show me how you did that?’ when it came to compliments on her looks, she had no idea what to say or do. but then they laughed! briefly, anne-louise bristled again. flashbacks of middle school trauma poisoned her mind and if he hadn’t explained himself just a second later, she might have burst into tears. “now i know you’re lying, because not a soul in this world thinks i could kick anyone’s ass.” anne-louise settled on a joke, though she wasn’t really kidding. “but, uh… thank you.” she finally accepted the compliment, deciding to trust that it wasn’t a prank. she couldn’t let the comment go without thanking them, at the very least. she was too polite for that.

“o–okay.” confused on why he wanted her to join him outside, anne-louise followed them anyway. it was a slow night, and she’d be able to see anyone coming in off the street through the window. on the weekdays, no one really came to o’shea’s unless they were regulars, so they’d know just to wait for her to come back in to take their drink. she hoped, at least. if someone came in and stole a bottle of liquor from behind the bar, she doubted she’d be able to escape a lecture from leon by invoking his uncle’s name. david, the former owner, would be pissed at her, too, if that happened; usually, he'd let her get away with murder, but not theft. that was the problem with anxiety—she ran through several different horrible scenarios in between the time it took to walk around the bar and head outside. she wrapped a strand of hair around her left index finger, using the other hand to daintily shake his own once they made it outside the building. “almost! it’s anne-louise.” an incredibly long name, it came from her moms being unable to pick between their respective choices for their daughter. in the end, they combined the two and cursed her with having to constantly spell it. “most people call me annie-lou, though.” or sometimes just annie, but never just lou. “nice to meet you, leo.” she tried not to wrinkle her nose at the smell of burning nicotine.

If Leo could declare they were knowledgeable in any category, he would be able to boast over his emotional intelligence. Though he tended to discredit his own feelings, snubbing his nose at them and waving them off without so much as a second glance, he could read others well. Most of the time - there were categories he would always be clueless in, merely because societal norms when it came to relationships still boggled his mind. But he could pick up on the little things, and a small grin appeared on his face as he watched Anne-Louise go through every emotion in the ‘surprised’ tier before finally settling on embarrassment. Which Leo didn’t really understand - embarrassment confounded him, and she had nothing to fuss over. Never when it came to him. It didn’t mean he wasn’t still endeared all the same, though, still leaning in close into her space, but properly taking in her features this time. They were pleasing, to say the least.

“You’re pretty. Real pretty.” He pressed, something as simplistic as pretty feeling improper, but it was his usual go to. Despite what someone might perceive about Leo, descriptors like beautiful and sexy always made him want to roll his eyes. They felt like if a word could be a try hard - the compliment was always real when he said pretty. It felt like the most truthful word that didn’t need to be dressed up. It just was. And she was pretty. Realising he’d sounded a bit surprised, like he’d originally expected an ogre as he came closer, Leo let out a sudden snort of laughter, stumbling to explain himself. “I sounded like an asshole. I just meant - when you blushed, it was kinda adorable. Don’t kick my ass, you look like you’d kick my ass if I said the wrong thing. It’s meant to be a compliment, I swear.”

It didn’t shock him that she didn’t smoke, but he was pleasantly surprised when she took up his offer to join him. He half expected to be shooed off by now, like a mosquito that wouldn’t stop droning in your ear, but if she was going to continue entertaining him, Leo wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. “Course I want you to join me.” He said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Eagerly waiting for her to come around the bar top, opening the door and everything as they stepped outside - though he had the temperament of the Tasmanian Devil, Leo still thought himself a gentleman. Occasionally. “Don’t kill me,” Because all the best sentences started that way, “but… Annie? Anna? I know I’ve heard it before - wait, don’t tell me! It’s Annie, final answer.” In his excitement, Leo’s accent drawled out, thick as molasses. “Leo,” he introduced next, shoving his lighter into his pocket after igniting a cigarette, and holding his hand out for her to shake. “Enchante.”

[bicrowleyaz]

Defenceless flower

I was looking for a quieter place than London to move to, until I found South Yorkshire, a county 233 kilometers from where I was staying.  That's when you ask yourself, why would I be looking for a location away from famous London?  I'd like to say that's a simple answer, but unfortunately it's not.

I'm looking for a new place to try to start over after a tragic accident that took the best and only friend I've ever had, Ron.  When we were returning from the walk we took every afternoon, after he dropped me off at my door I made the joke that I so wished I hadn't made that night.

-Bye Ron, see if you don't die huh!

-Bye Lou, I swear I'm careful!- he replied laughing as we always did, little did we know that this would be the last time we would see each other because of a disgusting guy who ran over him when he was crossing the street two blocks from my house.

A month has passed since it happened, I was in denial for the first week, I couldn't believe that my best friend was no longer there with me, but when the penny dropped I was devastated, I had never felt such an emptiness and such deafening silence which is not listening to his outrageous laugh and all those jokes with a dubious connotation every day.

I keep thinking about everything that could be different if I had called him in or if I had been in his place.  What would we be doing right now?  Would we be sitting on the couch watching that horrible series he liked and eating junk food?  Would we be on a bench near the London Eye judging the clothes of people passing by?  With an immense regret in my chest I know I won't have that answer.

On the advice of my psychologist, I decided that the best option would be to leave London for a less hectic place.  With that, I'm now leaving the airport and heading towards a taxi that would take me to my new home, a small apartment in Doncaster.  It didn't have any luxury or anything like that, but apparently it was cozy from what I saw in the photos.

-Visitor?- the gentleman who drove the car asked when we started to walk.

-Oh no!  I came from change.

-I hope you like the city, most of the young people here want to move instead of staying!-He replied with good humor.

-I imagine- I replied smiling as much as I could, he's a nice person, I don't want to be rude.

As soon as we reached the front of the building, I paid and said goodbye to the young man who I discovered was called John.  I looked at the facade of the building and remembered something Ron had told me once.

-If someday I'm not around to fill your patience, sing my favorite song!  I do it when you're away!

With that I started singing Saturdays by Louis Tomlinson who was his favorite singer, and he always said it was funny that his best friend and his favorite singer had the same name.  I thought it was a little weird.

-...We always used to say, saturdays take the pain away,

nobody stays the same, no matter how much you want it, some things change...

I started putting my things in their proper places, clothes in the closet, some pictures on the walls, my toothbrush in the bathroom.  I fixed everything humming his favorite song repeatedly until I found myself exhausted lying on the small sofa in the living room.

The next day, I woke up a little confused, not knowing exactly where I was.  I got up, took a shower, brushed my teeth, got dressed and went to do what I should have done yesterday, look for a job.  I went down the stairs and watched the tree-lined landscape of the city.  I looked for jobs everywhere I could, but none were accepting resumes.  I was thinking about giving up, letting it go, but I remembered one time when I was about to give up trying to study a subject I didn't understand at all, but Ron smacked me on the head and gave me a hard look and said if I don't try, that's where I couldn't do it anyway.  In the end, I got a higher grade than him and rubbed it in his face for a month.

I smiled remembering that, it was one of the thousands of good times I have with him.  When I was turning the corner I saw a place that caught my eye.  It was a flower shop, with a vintage look, with lots of colorful flowers on the facade.  I walked there and entered, it was as beautiful as outside, with two long corridors of colorful flowers and a very good aroma.  That place gave me an instant calm, a pure lightness.

-Hi, do you need some help?- a boy who seemed to be the same age as me came towards me, I got a little scared, but I soon recovered.  He was a little taller than me, had very dark straight hair, slightly tanned skin, slanted eyes in a honey tone, they reminded me a lot of cat eyes.

-Hi...hi, yeah, do you have openings for employees?

-Yes, we do, please accompany me- he told me with a sweet and very beautiful smile.

We got to the counter, went around the side and went into the back, he pointed me to the chair, I sat down and waited for him to do the same after getting a teapot and two cups.

-Would you like some tea?- he asked me, I nodded.  -So what's your name?  I've never seen you around here.

-My name is Louis Edwards, I just moved from London.

-Oh, a Londoner, why did you move there?  By the way, my name is Magnus Moore!- he told me smiling.

-I was looking for a quieter place, London is too busy for me.

-I see.- It seemed like he realized it was a sensitive subject for me, so much so that he was even giving me an understanding smile.  I smiled without showing my teeth in a form of silent thanks.

After that, he started asking me some questions, like my background, how many places I had worked, my age, things like that.  It turned out that we talked about other things too, trivial things, but that made me feel comfortable and welcomed, he is a very nice person.

-Do you mind starting tomorrow?

-Did I get the job?- I asked, trying to hide my excitement.

-Got Loueh!- he answered me laughing and carrying a little while saying my name.

-Wow, thank you!-I thanked him, shaking his hand.

-So, I was thinking here, since you just arrived in the city, how about we go eat something and then I can introduce you to the city, what do you think?- he asked hopefully.

-I...I, of course, why not?- I replied a little embarrassed, I'm not good at making new friends.

-Okay sir.  Edwards, let's go!- he said excitedly, grabbing his coat and leading me to the door.  I laughed at the way he called me, Ron called me that.

And so it was, following Magnus through the streets of cozy Doncaster that I began to reflect.  I will do exactly what my best friend told me to do: "live every day as if it were your last, and don't forget Loulou, always keep moving forward no matter what, I will be rooting for you!"  That's what I'm going to do, live like it's the last day of my life, I'm going to live for myself and I'm going to live for my friend, since they took his chance.

That's my story. I don't want copys, thank you.

[jamesv-t]

You remember the Ice Bucket Challenge, right? It was a big thing online in the summer of 2014, almost ten years ago. (Yes, “almost ten years ago” is only 2014, not 2003 or 1995. I’m sorry.) Can you remember what it was raising money for, though? Maybe not the specific charities, but the cause? 

If you said “ALS”, “Lou Gehrig’s disease”, or “motor neurone disease” then congratulations! You remembered correctly! But what’s the difference between the three? Well, nothing. They’re all the same thing. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis is a disease that results in the gradual loss of the motor neurones that control voluntary muscles, most famously contracted (famously to Americans, anyway) by former baseball player Lou Gehrig. It’s also what Futurama guest Stephen Hawking had. 

Around 50% of people with MND (I’m gonna use that interchangeably with ALS) die within 30 months - less than three years - of diagnosis. So around half of people survive longer than that time after diagnosis. Stephen Hawking lived with it for 55 years after diagnosis. Around 20% of people live with it for five to ten years. 

Two months ago my mum was diagnosed with it. 

She’d had a couple of falls last year, and associated pain hadn’t gone away in the meantime. Stress from a new job hadn’t helped - at the age of 63, a lot of things were just written off as old age, but fortunately working for a private medical practice she was able to “jump the queue” and get diagnosed a lot quicker than if we were waiting for the Tory-decimated NHS to get a spare slot. 

As soon as the word came through, she gave up work, and both her and dad have seen their social life dwindle due to difficulties getting around. The house - my childhood home, where I spent my life from 3 to my late 20s - has been adapted with stairlifts, walker frames, ramps and other accoutrements to enable her to move around. Thankfully (if such a word can be used for a situation like this) dad had retired last summer, and had a few months of enjoying retirement before becoming a full-time carer. 

I’ve been trying to put a brave face on matters, but hearing that last month she had a fall and damaged her ankle ligaments just from toppling over really hit home how fragile she is. As soon as we found out the diagnosis I changed my marathon attempt from a hobby to a fund-raising tool. (Actually, that’s not true. As soon as I found out I left work for the day, went and sat on Hove beach with a cup of tea, listened to a playlist of sad Bruce Springsteen songs interspersed with a Taylor Swift song about a parent getting diagnosed with a life-limiting disease, and cried my fucking eyes out.) 

I’m clinging to the fact that the same sheer-bloody-mindedness that I’ve inherited from her, the stubbornness that ensured I finished the marathon last Sunday despite severe gastro-intestinal issues for the second half, is the same stubbornness that’ll see her be in the ~50% that makes it to three years from diagnosis. The 50% that’ll see her granddaughter’s first day at school. The 50% that’ll make it to her Sapphire wedding anniversary in 2026. 

It’s a horrible thing to go through, knowing that the clock has started ticking. Since losing my uncle last autumn I’ve had several Google documents for eulogies that I know I’ll need to deliver, which I’ve been adding to as and when I think of things that I would want to mention, knowing that I probably wouldn’t be able to think of things in the intervening period before the service. One of those has become more fleshed out than others lately. 

It’s unpleasant, reading about something that a close family member has been diagnosed with, and seeing phrases like “palliative care” and “end of life decisions” cropping up frequently. It really hammers home that this isn’t a minor change in lifestyle, like requiring glasses or a hearing aid. It’s a life limiting disease. (A psychiatrist could have a field day with my choice of phrasing of “diagnosed with” rather than “living with”.) Both mum and dad are putting a brave face on it, but I’m going back to Kent on a monthly basis (and not even coinciding with a Gillingham home game, despite the Gills actually winning games lately) to see them. To make the most of time where I can. 

This is a long, rambling post. It’s a form of therapy, when I’ve had an evening to myself and I’m three stouts to the wind. It’s helpful to me to put things into words. It might be helpful to you, to know what’s going on with me (this is more for the half dozen on here who know me outside of Tumblr, rather than the rest who’re mutuals for fandoms we’ve both long since left behind). Rosie/Kai, if this is how you’re finding out, I’m sorry. 

I wish I could end this on a positive, uplifting note, but I don’t have that in me. I’m just spending three hours each way on trains heading back to Kent each month, making the most of things where I can.

[labellerose-acheron]

May 06, 2022 *** [Loud Bell]

@trip-downtheriverstyx​, @lou-bonfightme​

Belle had not heard from Hades today.

This was not odd, on a normal day. They were both busy people. Hades, these days, even busier than usual, what with being the mayor and all. Even in the very beginning days of them, they had never been the sort to spend long texting. Their longest conversations over text were arguments, or grocery lists. Belle wasn’t much of a texter anyway, though she was becoming more of one, as she felt incredibly self conscious taking personal calls at her cubicle at work.

It was not a normal day, however. It was Belle’s birthday. And no, she wasn’t the kind of person to fuss about it. Before Persephone and Hades had shown up, she rarely celebrated it at all. Was it even possible to celebrate something when you were the only one who knew about it? She’d buy herself a cupcake, sometimes, at Hatter’s, if she was feeling particularly--festive. Since Persephone, really--she was the one to wiggle her birthday out of her: Five days after mine! she had smiled. Tauruses are the best.--Belle had become accustomed to a...text message, at least. Maybe being able to skip out on dishes.

Though, to be fair, InterPride hadn’t forgotten. She assumed it was someone in HR’s sole job to track birthdays, as it seemed they had one just on her floor nearly every week. They had called everyone into the conference room and sung happy birthday and given her a cupcake. It had been horribly embarrassing, she had meant to stop it actually, but she’d forgotten to submit the request form and well...it had been rather sweet too. There was even a card that everyone had signed and Ting-Ting, Melody, and Gil had come up from accounting.

And still, no text from Hades.

By the time she’d gotten home, she’d more or less forgotten about the birthday card tucked into her bag, but--she hadn’t forgotten that she hadn’t heard anything from Hades.

“Maman!” Opal squealed as soon as the door was opened.

“Hihihihi!” Aidan chimed in. Bellamy, always quiet, just watched with big eyes. 

“Bon soir,” Lou said from the floor, though he began to rise. He stroked his hand over Opal’s head as he came to stand in front of Belle, Opal between them.

“Vas-y,” he told Opal encouragingly.

“Joyeux anniversaire, Maman!” Opal said with a charming accent.

Belle smiled and picked her up. “Merci beaucoup!”

“Joyeux anniversaire,” Toulouse repeated and then stepped forward to hug her. When he pulled back, he kissed her cheek.

“Merci,” Belle said again with another smile, though it faded as she glanced around. “Is Hades home yet?”

“Mm, no--did you not see? He will be a bit late.”

“Oh, he must’ve texted on my walk home.“

[outfit, flats not heels] [lou’s fit]

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

I’m sorry, but can I just go on a little rant about the Louis, clouis, and the Clem comic...? 

I didn’t really talk about Louis in my overall review of the comic because I wanted that to be more contained to the content shown on the pages, Clementine’s relationship with AJ, and her as a character.... but the more I think about these comics and Louis, the more frustrated I become thinking about what Clementine abandoning everyone would do to him. 

[... okay it’s not little anymore since I guess I can never just do anything simple when it comes to Louis, sorry my bad]

So, no surprise, we all know the comic’s bullshit by now. Clementine leaving everything and everyone behind because she’s not happy is dumb, AJ just letting her go is dumb, and Clem going to the mountains on crutches and a peg leg to find this so-called happiness is dumb. 

Now that we’ve established it’s dumb, I wanna talk about Louis because I got a lot of built up feelings about how bullshit this storyline is with how Clementine would not only abandon AJ, but also abandon Louis. 

Because let me tell you..... his heart would be broken beyond repair and I need to talk about why.

Sigh.... so.... muh boy. 

Before he met Clementine, Louis was this laidback, irresponsible, but caring and musical person who kept his head down to avoid conflict and never looked at the future. He was the kind of person who took things one day at a time, saw survival as a day-to-day task, and said that the future doesn’t exist, there’s only today. You get the point, he was never too concerned with things because they always seemed to work out, and if they didn’t, then that sucks and that’s why we should appreciate every day while we have it. 

Louis is shown to be charismatic and friendly, he spends his free time playing piano and card games, but no one really takes him seriously. Not even Marlon, his best friend for 8+ years. While he doesn’t seem to be on bad terms with anyone [including Aasim, they just act like people who disagree with the other’s point of view and have had the same argument many times, but that doesn’t mean they hate each other, y’know?] he also doesn’t appear super close with anyone outside of Marlon and possibly Violet, but even then. 

Marlon’s shown to have little faith in him with the way he talks about if Louis will even show up to hunt. He has a controlling grip on Louis that’s prominent during the confrontation scene when he uses intimidation to try to convince Louis to not interfere. Oh, and there’s the fact that Marlon’s been lying to Louis for the past year about the twins and then continued to lie to his face about what really happened to Brody... which isn’t great when you consider how Louis was the only one who had blind faith in him as a leader and, according to Marlon, was the only one who couldn’t see how pathetic he always was. 

Violet, while having a few more nicer moments with him than Marlon, still invalidates him and his feelings several times throughout the first half of the game which makes me wonder how close they ever were, or at least if Violet ever considered him a close friend to begin with. And no, a small monologue in the dorms doesn’t make everything better or confirm they were brotp the whole time... especially when once they’re on the boat, Louis might as well not exist because Violet can’t be bothered to acknowledge what happened to him or inquire about how he’s doing. I guess she just didn’t have time react while standing in her cell for several unbothered minutes-- no wait, it’s she already reacted off screen. Right. Good writing is good.

What I’m getting at here is that even though Louis is surrounded by people who he genuinely cares about, there is an argument to be made that he’s a lonely person. Hell, he’s aware of his loneliness when he says that no one hears past his music and jokes. I mean, how many nights do you think he spent by himself playing the piano because no one wanted to hear it? Are they like Violet and crack jokes about how he doesn’t have actual talent? Probably, given that someone literally carved “you suck at playing” onto the side of the damn piano. 

Oh, and let’s touch on that backstory of his. Louis grew up wealthy with two parents who loved him and each other, and they gave him anything he wanted except singing lessons. Louis says he wanted to be a real musician. But I guess his father didn’t like that idea and told him no, with the [as Louis puts it] dumb dad lesson of, “You get to be happy, or you get to be rich, can’t be both.” ...which is interesting given that Louis and his family were stupid rich but also.... were they not happy? well, that doesn’t make sense because little Louis knew that if he broke up their marriage, they would be hurt. 

So yeah, Louis was so upset that his father continually refused to let him take singing lessons that he broke into the man’s credit cards and faked an affair, which led to his parents divorcing... and then he spit his father’s words back in his face. 

Then they dumped him at Ericson. And the walkers came. 

There’s so much to unpack from the story he tells that it could be it’s own analysis, but basically.... Louis is aware of why what he did was fucked up, and he carries it with him every day. 

He regrets what he did, chews himself out for being such a “vindictive fuckhead” [and the amount of force used in that line tells you a lot, like how it’s not the first time he’s chastised himself like this] and he admits that he doesn’t even know the person he’s talking about. Yet, he still sees himself as bad, saying that they [I assume the staff] told him and the other kids they’re bad people. I don’t doubt that Louis internalized that which played a huge role in the confidence and self-esteem issues he has during tfs. 

Anyway, I’ll come back to this later, but when you take that amount of guilt and regret, and mix it with the fact that they dropped him off at this school that was supposed to make him better.... then the walkers came and those teachers, staff, and headmaster? Gone. Left a bunch of kids to fend for themselves, with the exception of Ms. Martin [but given how she looks when we find her I doubt she lasted that long] and I cannot imagine how horrifying that was for all of them. The dead are up eating people, and if you die you become one of them... and the people you thought you could rely on just fucking left you to die at this school. 

Every kid in that school has trauma and abandonment issues from before and after the world went to shit, every last one, and Louis isn’t the exception here. Over the years, a lot of kids died and they’ve all seen horrible shit. They all knew they were never going to see their families again, and as far as we know, no one came to get their kids at the beginning. They had to find ways of coping while trying to survive, and all they had left was each other. 

Louis copes with music and games and jokes. He’s built up this persona where it seems like he’s unaffected by the comments the others make, that the death and suffering he’s gone through is in the past, that he is confident and open to those around him.

But then Clementine and AJ show up, and Louis grows close with both of them. They had immediate chemistry upon first meeting, he was the one who looked after AJ since it seems like everyone else saw him as a little terror, and he went out of his way to be kind and make them comfortable. 

When they go hunting with him, Louis and Clementine have a moment after taking care of the walker where they lower their guards a bit-- Louis gives her more in-depth reasons for his views of survival, and going off her expression, it gets to her and makes her think.... but they’ve know each other a day and he’s not quick to infodump his life story or let her in, so he cuts the conversation short.

Then we have the Marlon confrontation scene that I have gone over so many times in the past. I won’t dillydally with it too long but..... Clementine appeals to Louis, who curls in on himself because of the control Marlon has on him. He wants to help, and hell, he knows this is wrong but he’s so used to not getting involved that he gets defensive.... plus, he’s known Clementine for two days, and he’s known Marlon for 8+ years.... he wants to believe Marlon but you can tell he doesn’t want this, either. It takes Clementine talking to him to give him courage to stand between her and Marlon’s gun and it’s a lot.

AJ shoots Marlon and everything goes to shit, and Louis is a goddamn mess. His best friend was murderer right in front of him, so add that to the trauma list, and he’s overwhelmed with all these feelings that again.... they keep getting invalidated by Violet because “Marlon was a liar and murderer, therefore you shouldn’t feel bad about his death. Get over yourself, Louis, you can be such a shithead sometimes.” 

Oh yeah Vi, I guess he should care more about two people he’s known for a total of two days rather than for the safety of the people [including you] he’s grown up with and cared about for 8+ years.... makes sense. 

So yeah, little to no support during this time. Alone again. 

And just because I have to make this clear so no one gets a hair up their ass-- both Louis and Violet are wrong here. Kicking them out isn’t the solution, but neither is acting like AJ was right to commit murder just because it was Marlon.

 But plots gotta plot, so they get voted out and you can see that Louis is conflicted about the whole thing. He wants them gone, but at the same time, he knows what kicking them out means. You can see it on his face that he’s not okay with kicking them out. He’s hurting when he’s there in the dorms telling them how the vote went... he literally doesn’t know what else to do. He just knows that everything hurts, Clem and AJ caused it, and he wants the pain to stop. He even tries to justify it to himself by figuring that they’ve done this before so they’ll be fine. Not a great thing to say, Lou. 

Anyway, we know the story, Clem and AJ come back and Louis once again sees the consequences of acting out of pain.... AJ is shot because Louis was hurt and he made a bad decision that he’s gotta live with.... something that he’s done before, and this affirms to him that he’s bad. He wishes he could take it back, and goes as far as to admit that to Clementine during the archery scene. 

By the way, credit to him for his apology to her. It’s rare in these games that Clem gets a genuine apology from someone who hurt her and doesn’t turn around to repeat the hurtful behavior, y’know? Plus, I can think of plenty of characters who owed Clem an apology in the past or if they did apologize, it was half-assed. 

You can feel how conflicted he is with this whole thing-- learning who Marlon really was and what he did, feeling something for Clementine before everything went down and not knowing how to handle those feelings afterward, caring about AJ and understanding why he thought shooting was the best choice but still hurting that his friend is dead.... 

And the thing is.... Louis forgives her for so much, as she does him, and through all of that bullshit, they manage to develop that strong connection that turns romantic. Louis lets himself be fully vulnerable with her and is honest about his feelings, how she listened when no one else did and seeing him for more than just the persona he put on. 

This works on Clementine’s side, too. Clementine has been through her own fair share of bullshit-- trauma, abandonment, loss, injury, you name it. She’s made mistakes, done terrible things, and has been in enough groups to know that romance usually ends in heartbreak.... and yet, she’s willing to open herself up to Louis and admit she feels a lot for him. 

Is it a little rushed? Yep. Could it have been handled better? Of course, most things this season could’ve, but what we got was pretty good. 

So Clementine and Louis are romantically involved now, the raiders attack, and she saves him... and boy does Louis feel guilty about that one, too. He feels bad enough that he questions why she would pick him because he can’t fathom his life being worth saving over another’s. He doesn’t see himself as useful, and even though Clementine is literally his girlfriend at this point, his self-esteem is so all over the place that he can’t understand why she would have him at her side. 

And when Clementine tells him that he’s too important to her, he’s too baffled to even give a response. He looks at her in disbelief like he wasn’t expecting her to say that.  But this shows that at the beginning of their relationship, he still doubts himself, and through her working with him, he begins to build up that strength in himself. 

He becomes brave enough to share what got him sent to the school with her, and he plays Don’t Be Afraid for everyone at the party and like.... for once, everyone is listening to him. Really listening to him. They’re not talking shit about his musical skills, they’re not ignoring him or the feelings he’s putting into the song, they’re sitting there with him and I just..... if you watch him, you can see that his eyes get pretty glossy throughout the song. The moment meant something to everyone. 

There’s also the fact that Clementine asked him to come with her and AJ onto the boat, and to be the one in charge of the bomb... that’s a huge responsibly and he feels the pressure of that. He starts to panic a bit about if he can do it, because what if he fucks up? What if he gets them caught and makes everything worse? What if something happens to Clementine and he can’t do anything about it? 

She’s there to reassure him that she believes in him, and that he can do this. They’re going to get everyone back, and he needs to focus... then he asks her to slap him which why would you? that’s dumb, so Clementine smooches him instead and like.... he physically relaxes into her because he’s comfortable and trusts her in this situation. 

Also, he loves her and cares about this mission enough to cover himself and his fancy jacket in walker guts.... sure, he complains while doing so but how else is he gonna cope with rubbing rotten guts on himself to blend in with a herd of walkers? 

Skipping ahead so that we’re not here all day, I wanna talk about the walk back to the school because it’s one of the most important clouis moments in the game and a huge reason that solidifies why the comic is bullshit.

Louis went off on his own to go out and find them. He didn’t know where they would be, he just knew that he had to go out and find them after making sure everyone was okay back at the school because he couldn’t bare the thought that he had lost them. And the way the AJ gets so excited to see him? and the group hug??

At this point, Louis has grown so much as a character. With Clementine by his side to support him, he’s grown stronger and more reliable. Remember how he never thought about the future? Well, now he is because his relationship with Clementine has given him a reason to long for a future. He talks about building this imaginary house with her, one he knows they can’t physically build... but it’s his way of saying we can build a home together, that he wants a future with her and AJ and everyone else. It’s such a personal conversation that flows so easy between them. Louis is more comfortable talking to her about things from his past, which is something he didn’t want to do back in ep1. 

He confides in her how he’s feeling after he shot and killed Dorian, he tells her that having a home means protecting it and I just.... it’s so good, okay? And from Clementine’s side, you can feel how at ease she is with him, too. Just the way she smiles at him as they’re walking? like he’s the cutest thing and she’s so happy to have him with her? 

But then we gotta deal with Minerva’s crazy ass on the bridge and well, AJ shoots Tenn and Louis is having flashbacks to Marlon and it’s not great. That’s a whole thing, and he ends up separated from them while escaping.

We don’t get to see Louis’ reaction to Clementine getting bit and losing her leg since I guess that puts a damper on the overly happy ending. But, going off of what we know about him and what I’ve explained [which isn’t even all of it, this isn’t a full Louis character analysis. if it was, it would be much longer and in multiple parts... believe it or not, I’m trying to not make this too long and only sorta failing...] we can get an idea of how he would react. 

Um, to say he was upset is an understatement.

Because remember, he had no time to think and climbed over the fence, thinking he could get them to climb over and they could get away, but it didn’t work. He ended up leaving them in order to save himself since walkers were closing in on him.

But you know that he’d blame himself for the bite. A lot of, “if I had just stayed” and “I should’ve climbed back over, I should’ve stayed with you.” I’m sure there were points where it looked like Clem wouldn’t make it and I can’t imagine how much hurt he went through watching her suffer and heal from losing a leg like that. 

Not only that, but knowing that AJ was the one to do it? And him thinking about what Clem’s death would do to AJ after all this? There isn’t a doubt in my mind that Louis would take care of AJ if she died. He cares about AJ, and he loves Clementine, so he be there for both of them, even if he’s still hurting from Tenn’s death. 

However, Clementine didn’t die. She survived the bite and amputation, and when we flashforward, she and Louis are still happily together. Louis is right there next to her at dinner, and he’s the one to help her with her crutches. He’s there to go over future plans to meet the traveling caravan, and Clementine wants him to be the one to go. 

Oh, and Louis once again forgives AJ for shooting Tenn, claiming that he understands that AJ saw something that he couldn’t. Like with Marlon, he’s not happy Tenn’s dead but he can see why AJ did it to save his life. 

I just..... happy ending. Clementine and Louis are together and she’s truly happy to have found a home for her and AJ with him at Ericson. 

....But then the comic thought it would be fun to say “nah.” 

The comic isn’t canon, I’m still insulted that it would ever consider itself as such, but even so I can’t help but feel so frustrated about how this would destroy Louis. 

He finally found someone he would consider his best friend, not just his girlfriend. She saw past that funny man persona and he trusted her enough to let her past this wall he built around himself. He let himself become vulnerable around her, he named his song after her. Their initials are carved into his piano with a heart surrounding them. He loved her. 

Clementine left him feeling loved, something he probably hasn’t truly felt since he was a little boy with his parents before their divorce. She loved him even after hearing his past because she knew that wasn’t him anymore, and she helped him build the confidence he needed to step up. Because of Clementine, Louis wants to enjoy every day while also looking at the future. He isn’t lonely anymore, he has her and AJ. He’s truly happy.

So to tell me that Louis would wake up one morning only to have AJ tell him that Clementine’s gone, she’ been planning an escape without telling anyone because she wasn’t happy...? I’m sorry, but if you think that wouldn’t leave Louis absolutely devastated, then you know nothing about him as a character. 

This idea is just.... look, Louis is perceptive. That’s a big part of his character, he’s perceptive of those around him. If Clementine was showing signs of being unhappy or depression, he would see it. He would notice a change. He would be able to tell if something was off, and he would ask her about it. Louis is the type of person to ask you what you need. What can he do to help? What do you need to feel better? And if you don’t know, it’s okay, he’ll help you figure it out in any way possible. 

Plus, the comic suggests that there are times where she went off on her own but came back [probably doing her escape prep ugh] and you expect me to believe that Louis wouldn’t notice that or wonder what she’s doing? Wouldn’t sense that something’s going on? 

After she’s gone, he’s going to blame himself for not being enough. He couldn’t make her happy and he was a fool to think he ever could. AJ lost the only family he’s known since he was born because Louis couldn’t help her, couldn’t do anything to stop her from leaving. 

And for him to realize that she didn’t love him? Clementine, the girl he thought the world of because of how strong and confident and in-charge she was, because she saw him for who he was..... she left him, abandoned him... and she couldn’t even be bothered with a goodbye.... that says that she didn’t care all that much about him in the end.

You KNOW that he would think he had this coming, too. How could the universe allow him to fall in love and be happy with someone who loved him back after what he did to his parents? He would feel so heartbroken that he would see this as some sort of karma for breaking up his parents happy marriage as a kid years before he ever met Clementine and before the apocalypse.

I fucking can’t.... I don’t have the words to fully explain how much I hate this. Louis wouldn’t be okay afterward, and I doubt he’d ever fully recover. I wasn’t joking when I mentioned before that Louis would stop playing piano. How could he sit there and play when I he can see is their initials and remember the night she confessed to him? When he named his song after her? Clementine left and took the music with her because Louis wouldn’t have it in him... something that he used to cope would be ruined and that’s just.... it’s fucking awful. 

Not only that, but now he has AJ who I assume is hurting just as much [though the comics inaccurately assume he would just let Clem go sooo... yeah] and he would be the only one Louis would really talk to about it, but then again.... what if AJ doesn’t wanna talk about it? What if AJ starts to act out and things just become terrible and Louis is just too overwhelmed? 

I just.... UGH. That’s how I feel. UGH. 

Clementine from the comic? Not her. She would never fucking do this to Louis, AJ, or anyone else at Ericson, and you would know that if you played the tfs. 

Sigh.... sorry, I just needed to get this all out. I haven’t seen anyone talk about how Clem leaving would affect Louis and I’ve gotten some asks/come across some posts about Louis that have left me incredibly annoyed.... well, I was annoyed before because of the comics, so my annoyances with those things were only heightened. So yeah... I wanted to talk about Louis’ character in hopes of explaining why he would be so hurt if this comic was canon. 

Which it’s not. So it’s fine. 

How are we all feelin’ at this point, by the way? I know I’m not the only one still annoyed with the comic, so I hope y’all are doin’ okay. Hope you’re stayin’ chill and thinking about your faves to help cope with this mess hahaha