#anyways amane thoughts

[dai-mondai]

"My mother should have Kept her faith until the very end."

[1driedpersimmon]

Meme

[nemesisfall]

obligatory pokemon au time!!

[tsutsumi-kurose]

I wonder what happened with Tsukasa in this timeline? Why is the hole on his face? Why are his shorts and feet BLOODY?

right?? peak tbhk giving us more questions than answers lol I’m so excited to find out!!

I’m personally still operating under the assumption that the clock keepers changed something in 1968, which is when amane was trying to use the clock to mess with time in some mysterious way, so maybe they let him change in a way he was previously unable to? or in a different way than he did originally?

what seems to be true right now:

1. amane did not die when he was four

2. tsukasa still made some sort of deal with the god

so, operating under the assumption that something changed in 1968, whatever was changed then was after tsukasa made the deal to save amane’s life.

the backwards letters in tsukasa’s speech bubbles also imply to me he is way more god-influenced than the tsukasa we met in the red house arc!! this could be because kou and nene never went there to convince him to go back in this timeline?

but there’s something interesting you mentioned!! which is tsukasa’s appearance is very different here!!

he seems to be wearing the same shirt, but his suspenders and socks are gone, and his clothes are dirty. original red house tsukasa seems unscathed despite all his time there.

I think his clothes could be covered in blood, but they could also be covered in ash? maybe he was pushed back into the fire he set? why has the red house/the god stopped taking care of him? why is he in the school and not the red house? why was tsukasa originally spat back out somewhere in town and not on the property of the red house itself?

I definitely think amane got the clock to work and is responsible for this—I find adult amane incredibly suspicious!!

the watch he gave tsuchigomori is stopped, like the clock keepers clock originally was

and it’s incredibly suspicious he was talking to students about the tsukasa rumor with a reassuring smile on his face. this is hanako after all!! his calm, reassuring smiles are historically often untrustworthy!! (also in all honesty this is kind of a hope… I love when amane goes off on his own moral compass being a little unhinged)

the clock keepers specifically sent hanako back when he was feeling rejected by tsukasa and claiming tsukasa was an imposter, not his brother. maybe this is the future that happens when amane acts on that feeling, rather than how conflicted and forlorn we see him feeling about tsukasa in the original 1968.

it’s devastating, but I love the possibility that a past made through a boy’s grief and sense of rejection and pain has led to something like this… a more worn down, more haunted tsukasa.

is this who tsukasa becomes when amane doesn’t believe in him?

(honestly kind of hoping it’s something else though, bc it’s almost too sad to think of amane not believing in tsukasa, to the point of sending him back there…)

[good-beans]

Attention milgramblrgram prisoners!! *attaches you to my keychain* *attaches you to my keychain* *attaches you

Not that I need atonement for anything, but I've been doing a lot of angst for milgramblrgram -- I wanted to offer something sweet 🤲

@amugoffandoms @rainbowghostcat @lostxmelody @gunsli-01 @justzosiahere

@waivyjellyfish @luce-speaks @fayesdiary @purgemarchlockdown @kyanako5972

[poolseason]

brain dump on amane yugi after tbhk 120

i'm just launching out everything that came to mind.

1. The Red House's Possession

Amane's life, regardless of the timeline, is depressing as all hell. But the main thing is, Yugi-sensei lived only to his late 20s, and died somewhere in the Red House. It's safe to say he was still a teacher at Kamome when he died, and maybe.. he was still a teacher at Kamome after he died. Let me explain,

It's kind of hard to get a good grasp on his character and his awareness of the supernatural considering he's POSSESSED and all, but to try to work it out

Theory A: Amane's not aware of the supernatural. This could explain how he seems to be totally clueless after the Red House entity's possession, and gives a reason for the prescription Aoi finds in 119. Amane isn't actually naturally inclined towards the supernatural, and gets medicated (either by himself or his parents) to somehow deal with the lost time or the childhood paranoia

Theory B: Amane has always been aware of the supernatural, and knowingly taps into the Red House's power to try and bring his brother back through the rumours spread throughout the school

Personally I'm leaning towards option A,,, Remember Kou's circumstances? He was possessed in chapter 116, and then unwittingly lured himself and Mitsuba to the well, after being sent by a "teacher" which could have been Amane's spirit. And we see that Hole/Entity/Red House tends to jump from host to host, mb depending on who's most likely to effectively bring in a new sacrifice. It takes back Kou in it's attempt at eating Nene, after momentarily losing momentum with Amane, but it didn't go Hole Mode right away.

All this to say that the Yugi-sensei in the flashback, and even Nene's time-shifting scene from ch115 is at least in someway under the control of the Red House Entity. Outside of that, man is just one dopey ass confused mf.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2. break: what does Tsukasa have to do with all of this?

Tsu never returned from inside the Hole, but he's always had the power to in the original time

The Entity seems to be possessing him in the new timeline too. At least, it's holding a lot more influence on him. I don't think it's a stretch to assume that Tsukasa's always been bonded to it, since he was 3yo, just managed to hold more of his own sense of self in the old world because he left the pit and whatever the fuck happened to Amane in this world didn't happen in the other one.

Posessed Tsukasa has fully light eyes, while posessed Amane has fully darkened eyes (and also TENTACLES???? WHY?????). The reason why still stands to be contested, but maybe there's something involving the how the Entity is controlling them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3. Jump to the past

Amane is regaining his memory of the other world. That much is obvious from the fact that Amane AND Kou both snapped out of control. Tentacle!Amane even broke down the door, giving them an out, and didn't even follow. Is Hanako's memories going to come through in the future chapters?

Also important to note that Nene's Mermaid scale curse is active (again? was it ever off?)

Akane's new plan is to use the Big Clock to rewind time, which means in the coming chapters or the next arc, our heros might travel to a time period where Yugi Amane will actually be alive.

The Clockkeepers created a divergence in 1968, the year Amane was working on the Big Clock, however we know that the earliest change in the timeline happened on Amane's 4th birthday around he discovered Tsukasa was missing and was told that the future was changed by a mysterious figure (a Clockkeeper? a future version of himself?? even one of our protagonists???)

a few things that are worth considering, now that we've thought a little about Yugi-sensei's knowledge of the supernatural and his current possessed status:

In the old timeline, and the new timeline, when did Amane first learn about the supernatural? Was he able to see spirits before he died? In the original world, He clearly didn't have a clue when he was 8, but by 1968, likely did, just a year before his death. Which has me wondering, if he didn't then he doesn't have a sixth sense, he's just close to death. Similar to Nene.

Maybe Amane's posession isn't exclusive to this new world... Does it have anything to do with his seal, or even the twin's deaths?

There's a lot of water theming here: A wishing well, a tentacled beast, a mermaid curse, a bathroom ghost. All boundaries are partially submerged. The supernatural in Kamome are direcly linked to water. Why's this all tied?

[kiyomitakada]

people misa killed before she ever met light:

seiichi and seiji machiba: "tv celebrities caught with some drugs" per ryuzaki, killed to prove to sakura tv she actually had kira powers

kazuhiko hibima: news anchor who called kira evil

unnamed commentator: other news guy who called kira evil

(stray thought while i was going through this — do you think kiyomi was watching this broadcast and went "finally! he's making his views clear! good communication!")

ukita: police officer, aizawa's friend, you know him

(other stray thought: aizawa/L should be a much larger ship than it is. where are the aizawa/L enthusiasts. L literally starts shaking when aizawa threatens to go follow ukita)

two more non-task-force police officers who drove to sakura tv

hey girl :)

(stray thought #3: an AU where misa successfully kills soichiro upon entrance would be faaaascinating. light would be much less willing to work with her for one thing)

TOTAL: two (minor?) celebrities, two news people, three police officers, and she tries to get either the NPA director-general or L onto TV too

[nezz-cringe-crib]

i think it's really interesting that misa was actually chosen by a shinigami to be given a death note, meanwhile light just so happened to come across a death note. makes me wonder what would've happened if light had never picked up the death note, because i'm assuming misa would've still been attacked, and therefore still be given a death note. if kira didn't exist, who would she start worshipping for saving her life? would she just worship the shinigami? would remmisa be real? the world may never know.

[vividstardustrevolution]

Fun fact: Futa is *not* the canon system character in MILGRAM!

...Neither is Yuno...

[Text Transcription: "Let's just do it, please smile?"]

...Haruka's not either...

[Text Transcription: "My loneliness was desired"]

...nope, not Shidou either...

Amane isn't canonically a system either, but I definitely understand the people who think she might be or headcanon her as such, especially after "The Purge March".

[Text Transcription 1: "It's the beginning of a most wonderful day"]

[Text Transcription 2: "With pure, unsullied body and soul,"]

No, Kazui's not the canon system either.

[Text Transcription: "All these memories and you Only if I could erase them"]

Where, then...?

Ah, I found him!

Hi Mikoto!

[Text Transcription 1: "It's like what's wrong isn't wrong"]

[Text Transcription 2: "I'm already the fake one"]

...but y'know, it is kinda funny that at least 7/10 of the MILGRAM prisoners have two versions of themselves on screen interacting with each other (I don't remember Muu, Mahiru, or Kotoko having scenes like that, but let me know if I'm wrong, and Kotoko still has Deep Cover coming, too), and yet only one of them is a canon system. Yes, you can explain Haruka and Amane's as self-abuse and dissociation, Futa's, Shidou's, and Kazui's as dissociation, and Yuno as compartmentalizing herself and how she acts around different people, but still.

It's interesting how it's only seemingly portrayed negatively with Mikoto, too, although to be fair, Haruka and Amane both hurt the other versions of themselves in their interactions (Haruka looks down on and pushes and chokes the younger version of himself, and Amane looks down on herself and sends herself into the water), but...still, that feels different from Mikoto's case. Maybe it's because in the cases of 010203050708, we know that the other them they're interacting with is still them, but in Mikoto's case, we don't know that. Haruka, Yuno, Futa, Shidou, Kazui, and Amane's "other selves" aren't treated as evil (or, if they are, it's not to the same extent that we see Mikoto's alter (or alters, if you're one of the people who believes in one of the Trikoto theories out there) treated as evil and inhuman).

Now, I do think that you can argue in good faith that part of why Mikoto's DID gets demonized so hard in MeMe is because Mikoto is slowly coming to the realization that he's a system and has some internalized ableism to deal with regarding that (because internalized ableism isn't uncommon regardless of the disorder involved; it's not true for every system that there's internalized ableism, but it makes sense for Mikoto "I'm just a normal guy; what do you mean I'm a murderer?" Kayano). However, I don't think that completely explains the demonization that Mikoto deals with. We see it with his interactions with Kotoko. That interrogation answer where Shidou says, "Since Mikoto became 'like that,' the smoking group stopped really interacting," shows that Shidou seems to be uncomfortable with Mikoto now that his DID has been outed. The fact that Haruka is the only person who willingly interacted with Mikoto since trial two started (the only other person Mikoto has interacted with is Kotoko, and he was the one who approached her because similar to him, everyone is avoiding the fuck out of Kotoko) shows that most people are avoiding Mikoto. (Granted, Mikoto was kind of an ass to Futa and Amane, and Mahiru was busy not fucking dying, but what about the rest of the group?) In fact, the fact that the characters are treating Mikoto (who, while kind of a jerk, has not physically attacked anyone as far as we know and only fought Kotoko in self-defense) the same way they're treating Kotoko (who literally attacked three people, damaged Futa's eye with her baton, nearly killed Mahiru, attacked Mikoto, and is generally an asshole (/affectionate) and has been an asshole to all but two people in the cast) is telling me that the majority of the cast sees him the same way they see her - threatening and dangerous - and it's likely that he's seen as dangerous mostly because of his DID. Even Haruka, who literally threatened to kill himself, has been checked on by two people - Futa and Muu.

...Does that seem fucked up to anyone else - that the characters seen as "dangerous," and especially Mikoto, who is being treated as a danger mostly because of his DID, are isolated and not being interacted with or checked on by most of the cast (because we all know damn well that Kotoko has not interacted with anyone since trial two started other than to chastize Kazui and tell Mikoto his existence is a crime)?

...I dunno where I'm going with this. I'm just...kinda just dumping my thoughts out and seeing where it goes.

[randomidiocyncrazies]

Honestly... milgram project is fun bc you get to analyze the characters (and try to work out their "murder" + the circumstances surrounding it) AND you get to analyze the fandom as a bonus too

[weather-cluddy]

Man, today's question really reminded of how little interest Shidou seems to have in Amane as a person. He says he's frustrated that he doesn't have the time to "do something" about her, but even when she approached him, he didn't even try to reason with her or comfort her.

She tries to warn him that he's committing an unforgivable sin that will damn everybody, he's just like "Now, what could you be talking abooout? Anyways, just stop worrying about it and help me, okay?". And when she insists, his reply is "Ok, wow, you're so spoiled. Your parents must've been real soft on you until now, but that's not gonna fly with me, alright? I'm a responsible adult, I'm going to ignore you no matter how much of a brat you are"

He just dismissed Amane's very obvious mental breakdown as a mere temper tantrum, presuming that Amane doesn't truly care about anything she's espousing and that she's just trying to test boundaries. May I also point out how Shidou makes zero mention of Amane in his voice drama, either as a threat or as somebody who, like Fuuta and Mahiru, is in a precarious mental state?

And that casts a really different light on what "having the other adults deal with Amane" is supposed to mean. Is it really about making her more able to cope with the situation? Or just getting her out of the way? If it's about helping her, why does it matter so much that the adults do it?

Say, Muu and Haruka are in the best physical and mental shape out of everybody, and they have plenty of free time. Since Haruka says they're "sticking close" to Shidou, why doesn't he take a moment to suggest they should try to spend a little time with her, make her feel a bit better? Even if they can't convince her to change her mind, it'd at least useful to know in more detail what she's planning, right? After all, Shidou is willing to put his utmost ideal (dying to atone for his sins) on hold for the sake of the injured prisoners. Surely he must be very concerned about anything that could threaten their care, right?

Even if you take is as meaning "Well, the adults have the duty to care for the younger ones, so everyone under eighteen is exempt for responsibility", it's kind of really weird to put all the responsibility on three people having their own mental and physical breakdowns (Mahiru, Mikoto and Fuuta), one guy who said re:Amane that "we can't worry about that now" and "We'll just wait until the situation changes" last time Shidou spoke to him, and who's carrying the weight of being the only line of defense against Kotoko (Kazui) and one woman who's already taking mental care of Mahiru and also doesn't seem to want to have anything to do with anyone else (Yuno). Does a few years of age really give you that much more capability, such that it outweighs everything else going on?

So the fact that Shidou takes the trouble of specifying that an adult ought to help Amane really sounds like he's, at best, blinded by ideology. Only adults can help Amane because only adults are capable of taking meaningful action on anything, and only they have real ideological commitments that can beat a child's silly whims. At worst, Shidou is annoyed that Amane is threatening his worldview of "adults act, children obey", so he wants somebody to step in and bring her back into line. Of course, that person has to be an adult if they're to truly reinforce his perspective instead of opening a different kind of hole into it.

And this is hardly the first time he dismisses a child's thoughts on the basis of their age. In Molech, when Es tells him to treat them with respect as the warden, Shidou's answer is essentially "But we DO have a big age difference, so everything else is irrelevant. Let me pat your head to show how much I pity you, total stranger who's already annoyed at me for being condescending". At this point, either Shidou is being deliberately obnoxious or he's so thoroughly drunk his own kool-aid that it doesn't even register on the shallowest level when a kid tells him not to do something. Kids just go agoo-goo until they hit eighteen, yeah? No need to listen to their babbling.

And it's not just Shidou treating Es as both warden and child, he doesn't seem to have any respect for their ability to form their own opinion as a warden either. He literally goes "Hey, why go through the trouble of actually looking at evidence? Just take me at my word, way easier and faster". Even though by this point it's also obvious how much pride Es takes on being the guard and carrying out Milgram's mission, and that they don't necessarily trust Shidou. Again, either mockery or a frightful failure of basic pattern-recognition when the pattern doesn't match what Shidou expects from a child.

And to tie this back to Shidou's "my heart goes out to you" comment, sure, he's so concerned about any mental toll being the warden might take on Es… But he's still insisting on being murdered by them. Why? Surely Shidou of all people would know that murder can be hard on the killer. And if he wanted to die so badly, surely he can wait until Milgram is over and kill himself then, right? No need to make it Es' responsibility.

One of his last lines in the VD is "I feel sorry that you had to be given this role. And, I truly apologise for being so insistent about sentencing me to death as well… But, you’re perfect. You’ll give me the ending I’m most suited for." So apparently the thing is that being murdered by a child, specifically, would be very satisfying to Shidou, and Es' pain is secondary to that.

Kinda undermines all that talk about how tragic the situation is, doesn't it? In one of the app conversations, we see him being overwhelmed by sadness while grading Amane's homework, and he says "If everything about MILGRAM is true… why did a child like you have to become a murderer? Just imagining what sort of circumstances must have led to that, it makes me so sad…". But apparently his sadness isn't so strong that it'll stop him from setting up that sort of circumstances.

The only way this makes sense to me if it's he's subsumed Es' choices into his own so utterly that he can't imagine anybody, not even Es, could possibly hold them responsible if they did kill Shidou. It was simply suicide with Es acting as a tool for it, no more guilty than a bullet. I'm sure you can see how utterly dismissive this is of Es' autonomy.

TL;DR: I'm sure Shidou loves the idea of children, but so far he's been severely lacking in empathy for actual children when they deviate from his concept of how they ought to be or when their wellbeing comes in conflict with his ideals.

[good-beanswrites]

Just wanted to plant an idea if you wanted a bit of fuel: Mahiru asking Yuno to come to her cell before everything goes down.

Edit: I forgot the ask didn't say it but this is part of Kyanako's incredible Order Of Attack AU!

Didn't mean for this to become a mini Mappi study but here we are ✨ Thank you for the request! I fully intended to write them hanging out, but it's more right before they hang out lol. Went a bit on-the-nose with foreshadowing, but isn't that the fun part? It has become Emotional Over Mahiru Hour...

I kept things vague, but TW for mentioning her boyfriend's state of potential self-harm

Mahiru tried not to act superstitious, she really did. As much as she loved the idea of little luck charms, or avoided easy signs of misfortune, it was easier to keep quiet about such ridiculous things.

Maybe catching a bride’s bouquet meant no guarantees; maybe there was no real harm in stepping underneath ladders, maybe a coin tossed into a fountain had no real magic to its wish. However, the one thing she knew for sure held power was a lucky presence. Being in the right place at the right time could alter everything. And today was the right time for something. There was this waiting in the air. The prison had been holding its breath. Mahiru knew it was time to release it all.

“You must be so lonely, why don’t you let big sis Mahiru keep you company?” She beamed at Amane.

She often recalled the good fortune that she and a certain young man had crossed paths on the university terrace. She used to laugh with him about the wonderful coincidence of bumping into each other outside of the bakery, then the convenience store. 

Though she’d never spoken about it to him, she was also grateful for many occasions where she walked in on him at the precise moment to talk him out of something reckless. She always told him that they’d do everything together. He didn’t need to be alone anymore. 

“I wish to be alone. I need peace of mind to think.” Amane turned away from the cell door.

It was a good thing, too. Mahiru’s smile wasn’t as convincing as she said, “o-oh. Of course.”

She made her way around the panopticon, hearing Fuuta pace his cell in anticipation. He must have felt it too, this holding of breath. 

Or perhaps not. He turned down her offer for a bit of company, including a few more colorful words than Amane had. Mahiru just apologized for bothering him and headed back to her cell. She wasn’t sure where Mikoto was at this hour, but she didn’t feel like smiling through a third rejection.

She shook her head back and forth. She wished the motion could rattle the voices inside, she wished she could shake them all away. With her arms secured in place she could no longer cover her ears. She used to hum to keep them at bay, but lately they’d been too loud to stifle. They just kept on talking.

Their words told her the two were right. Nobody needed her company. No – nobody wanted it. Being together hadn’t helped her boyfriend. In fact, being together had been the very thing that got him killed. No wonder Amane and Fuuta wanted to avoid her. 

So then, this was for the best. She would rather deal with the brief sting of refusal than stumble in one day to find them hurt… or worse. As much as she tried to avoid the superstition of it all, the voices reminded her that her very presence could mean life or death. 

“Mappi, are you alright?” Mahiru hadn’t realized a tear had slipped down her cheek until she hurried to swipe it away in front of Yuno. 

“Hah, I’m fine! Just fine.” It was impossible to fool her, Mahiru had learned, but that never stopped her from trying. 

At least she always spoke tactfully. “Rough morning?”

Mahiru shifted her arms in her uniform, making a small sound of agreement.

“Can I do anything to help? What if I stay with you for a bit? I can do your hair, and…”

The voices were right. Amane and Fuuta knew it, too. Presences did hold power, and Mahiru’s was cursed.

But she would sound foolish admitting such a fear to Yuno. She'd heard plenty from the voices about how stupid and airheaded she was, there was no use in getting the same lecture from someone as grounded as her.

Mahiru managed a weak protest, unable to explain her real reasoning. Yuno was insistent. She didn’t give much of a choice. Could she feel the strangeness of the prison, as well? 

At last, Mahiru allowed her shoulders to sag. Yuno was lucky. And kind. Having her nearby would do her good. Amane and Fuuta would be alright. Mahiru had tried spending more time with them after verdicts were announced. Now, she made a mental note to pull back. If her love couldn’t save anyone, at least she could spare them from her curse. They would be safe. 

“Yes. Please stay. The truth is... I don't want to be alone.”

[milgrambles]

Double thumbnail is out! I'm afraid.

Something that immediately caught my attention here is how, despite the bloodiness of the scene, Mikoto's clothes and bat are perfectly clean. Is he really the one who broke these mannequins, or is something else going on here...?

[deadqueernoldor]

Nghhh chewing on finweans and realizing how self-sacraficial is so deeply instilled in that family, and that that particular trait is prevalent in each generation.

Finwe knew he couldnt win against Morgoth, but he could try and protect his grandchildren. He fought regardless.

Fingolfin knew he couldnt twin against Morgoth in 1-on-1. He fought regardless.

Finrod knew he would die on his quest for Beren, and still fought the wolf to save his friend. He did.

Celebrimbor knew he could protect others by dying, protecting the knowledge about the rings. He did.

It stands to reason that Elladan, Elrohir or Arwen, would have come upon a similar fate.

[tathrin]

Ehehe, hello, I am here to feed the procrastination gremlin! Those prompts all sound fun, but 21 and 28 are speaking to my heart rn.

Maybe 36 to if you feel up for it but it's your writing and you decide how many you wanna do<3

The procrastination gremlin thanks your mightily! Because I tend to Get Too Long when I write thing, I'm going to preemptively separate these out into their own posts and just assume that I'll ramble too much for it to make sense to do them all in one lmao. Also I will definitely do all three because yes more gimleaf yes. This is an ask meme that I will literally always be accepting prompts for (although if somebody sees this in the tag in like a month or so and wants to send one in, maybe include some context so that I know what that random number I just got in my inbox means? lmao). So, prompt taken from this; anyone can feel free to send other numbers in at any time. Literally.

#21....on a place of insecurity.

Gimli stared at his reflection in the round silver mirror, his hands paused even though his braids were still half-undone. "Do you ever wish that we had crossed the Sea sooner?" he asked.

Legolas blinked at him, cocking his head in that familiar birdlike tilt of confusion that Gimli knew so well.

"Sooner?" Legolas repeated. "How could we have come sooner?" A frown furrowed his smooth, beardless face; a temporary crinkling of skin that would never show the faintest wrinkle. "You mean before Aragorn died?"

"You're right," Gimli sighed. He tugged at his braids, their once-bright copper laced so heavily with strands of silver that he sometimes felt like he had just walked out of a snowfall. "We could not have, of course. But...do you ever wish..."

"Leaving sooner would not have spared us the pain of his death," Legolas said quietly. "It would only have meant that we would not have been there for him when it happened; only have meant that we would not have been there for Arwen or their children either. Knowing of his death only from stories brought by later travelers would not have spared us anything, I do not think; knowing of his death without having been there ourselves would, I think, have only made it hurt the worse, my dear."

"Yes," Gimli said, "yes, of course. I did not mean—"

He stopped. Legolas had walked up behind him and bent down to look over Gimli's shoulder into the mirror. It should have looked awkward, the sight of Legolas's long spine arced at such an angle, but elves were spindly, lithesome creatures. Wood-elves in particular seemed to be as supple and spritely as saplings, and Gimli had yet to witness Legolas contort himself into a position that strained his pliant bones.

"Gimli," Legolas said, "what is wrong?"

"Nothing," Gimli said. He lowered his eyes and his fingers both, twisting his remaining braids into place as quickly as he could without mussing the pattern of the plaits or dropping strands. He scowled, even though he knew that doing so would only deepen the wrinkles that already lined his eyes. "Nothing is wrong."

Long, smooth fingers pressed gently on his own calloused ones until they stilled. Gimli looked down at the overlap of those long digits across his own, the one set brown and spindly as twigs yet unblemished by time or strife; the other pale as underground mushrooms and gnarled by both time and heavy forge-work.

"Gimli," Legolas said. "Tell me."

Gimli turned his hand so that he could enfold those long brown fingers in his own and gave Legolas's hand a reassuring squeeze. "Nothing is wrong, my love," he said again. "I am only feeling melancholy this morning, it seems. Think no more upon it."

He raised the elf's ageless hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to those smooth knuckles, then released it so that he could continue with his braids.

Legolas did not rise. Instead he dropped lower to fold his arms across the back of Gimli's chair, his bright eyes studying the sight of the dwarf before him in the mirror. Gimli avoided his gaze, focusing instead on the intricate plaits that hung from his chin, but he could feel the weight of Legolas's eyes passing over his face, searching for the answers that Gimli would not give him.

He did not find them.

"Will you not tell me?" Legolas asked at last. His voice was soft, his eyes full of sorrow. "Please?"

Gimli sighed and let the braid in his hands droop loose and unfinished down his chest.

He looked up into the mirror again at last and met Legolas's searching, worried eyes there. He looked at that smooth, beardless, beloved face waiting there behind him; unchanging and unchanged from the day they had first met so long ago and far away in Rivendell.

His eyes flicked sideways to his own reflection, to the wrinkles that time had carved beneath his beard; to the strands of silver that wove through the bright copper braids that hung before him. He reached out and pressed his fingers to the mirror, to the sight of the lines around his eyes, and sighed.

"I would not be so old," Gimli said quietly, "if we had come sooner; that is all. I only wonder if you wish, sometimes, that we had. That is all."

Time did not pass in Aman the way it did in other places; or if it did, then it did not feel as though it did, and it carried no trace of decay with it. Gimli had not aged a day since they had first set foot upon these white shores—but he had aged two hundred and sixty-two years before that.

He was still hale and hearty, for dwarves—especially the dwarves of Durin's line—often lived many years longer than that, and rarely weakened before the very ending of their days came upon them. But he was no spritely youngster of sixty-two, either, moping because his father had deemed him too young to go along on a Quest; nor was he a mature youth of not quite one hundred and forty, boldly striding forward at last upon a Quest of his own, all bright brown eyes and ruddy copper beard.

Gimli was old, now, and he looked it. He could see it every morning when he looked in the mirror to do his braids, or every afternoon when he caught sight of his reflection in the cooling barrels at the forge or in some clear, still pool that held Aman's crystal waters. He could see it, and he knew Legolas could as well; how could he not, when he was surrounded by the contrast of all the smooth, beardless, ageless faces of his people?

"Are you tired?" Legolas asked, and his light voice was a dry croak. Shadows as thick as Mordor's fogs filled his eyes, and Gimli turned from the mirror with a cry and caught Legolas's hands with his own.

"No!" he cried. He knew that Legolas was not asking after Gimli's slumber, or weariness from working the forge; was not asking about anything as simple as a day's ordinary exhaustion. He was asking if Gimli was tired of life; if he was tired of eternity. If he was ready, at long last, to claim the gift of his own mortality.

"Legolas, no," Gimli said, squeezing those spindly fingers so tightly that had they been the frail twigs they seemed they would have snapped beneath the pressure of his grip—but elvish flesh was strong, so much stronger than it looked. So were dwarven spirits, and Gimli had no intention of ever growing weary of the world, not so long as Legolas was in it. "I promise," he assured his elf, raising first one hand and then the other to his lips. "Never, Legolas. I am here with you, and I always will be."

Legolas's smile trembled, but it was a smile. Gimli counted it as a victory, and pulled the elf up out of his crouch and into Gimli's lap. He had too much leg to fit on such a short chair, of course, but the two of them were used to that problem; it was no effort at all to fall into the long habits that had his ankles curling sideways under the chair, his elvish flexibility making easy work of the awkward position.

"Then what troubles you?" Legolas asked. He snaked his long arms around Gimli's shoulders and leaned his beardless cheek down to rest upon Gimli's head. "My love, please. Tell me."

"I am old, Legolas," Gimli said. He unwrapped one hand from the elf's slender waist to press his fingers to the cobweb of wrinkles beside his eyes. "You can see it plainly on my face. Old, as no one else in Aman ever will be."

"Bilbo is old," said Legolas.

Gimli rolled his eyes. "Yes, all right," he said. "And Sam, too. But aside from them, everyone else here is an elf—"

"Or a maia," Legolas interrupted. "Or one of the Valar. Or—"

"My point," Gimli cut him off loudly, "is that age is writ across my face in ways that elvish faces do not age. I am only sorry, my dear, that I can do nothing to erase those lines, these streaks of silver; only sorry that you cannot spend eternity beside a dwarf in his prime of life, but must instead contend with these wearisome wrinkles."

Legolas drew away far enough that he could gape down at Gimli. "Wearisome?" he repeated. "Sorry? Gimli!"

"I know, I know," Gimli soothed, "it is a little enough thing, I suppose, and I am not ungrateful; I am only sorry for your sake, my dear—"

"Sorry!" Legolas said again. "Gimli, you everlasting fool of a dwarf! Is this what you've been fretting over all this time?

"...Yes?"

"Gimli!" Legolas squawked. "Oh, my beloved idiot! I feared you were growing tired of forever, and were going to have to leave me! Instead you've just been pouting over how handsome you are?"

"Handsome!" Gimli exclaimed. "Legolas, enough. I am sorry beyond words that I made you worry, but that is no call to mock me—"

"I do not mock," Legolas said. His lilting voice for once was as firm as stones. "I adore every inch of you, Gimli. Yes, even the wrinkles; yes, even the silver in your beard!" He shook his head, scowling down at his dwarf. "Perhaps especially the silver in your beard, for it gleams like mithril in the moonlight, even as the ancient lights of lost Trees are said to still gleam in the locks of the Lady Galadriel, oh Lockbearer!"

Gimli sputtered, heat rising fast in his cheeks. He tried to push the elf away, but Legolas tightened his grip upon his shoulders and refused to be budged from Gimli's knees.

"And your wrinkles," he continued in a softer voice, "are the signs that our years together have etched upon your face, even as your clever hands carve beauty into simple metal and plain rocks. How could I help but love them, when they trace our story out upon your face for all to see?" Legolas leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to the sparkle of crows-feet that framed first one eye and then the other, then traced the deep tracks that lines Gimli's mouth and nose beneath his beard. Finally he raised Gimli's hand and pressed a long kiss to those ruddy, wrinkled fingers.

"Legolas, I...I feel I've been a fool," Gimli murmured. He found himself once again unable to meet Legolas's eyes, this time because of the blush that darkened his cheeks with a blaze of hot mortification.

"You have been," Legolas agreed, "but fortunately I knew you for a fool long before I knew you for anything else, my love, and so I am not bothered overmuch."

A watery laugh spilled from Gimli's lips, and he could not help but smile. "And you are as irritating and irreverent as ever," he retorted.

"Of course I am," Legolas agreed, and hopped up off Gimli's lap and the low chair upon which he sat and grinned down at his dwarf with a twinkling smile. "Some things do not change with the passage of time—but even though my face does not show it, I have very much been changed by knowing you, my dear Gimli, and I would not trade a second of it in exchange for a single lifted wrinkle or silvered hair."

"Well," Gimli said, "I am glad to hear it, and sorry now that I did not voice my concerns sooner."

"So am I!" said Legolas. "But I cannot hold it against you when I did not voice mine either, although in my case it was because I feared to pressure you into extending your time in life beyond your own comfort for my sake alone."

Gimli stood and took his elf's hands in his and held them tight. "Forever is only barely enough time to spend at your side, Legolas," he said, "but as it is all the time the world will give us, I will take it; but I will accept not a second less than that, and would not see that time shortened for any reason even if it was only for your own comfort, and not my own. I can think of no greater purpose for one's life than to bring comfort to one whom I so love."

Legolas beamed down at him, his pale eyes bright with unshed tears. "Well!" he said. "That is all sorted, then!"

"Indeed it is," Gimli agreed. He knew that the smile spreading behind his beard was the sort of soft, misty-eyed grin that Peregrin Took had always labeled "absurdly sappy," but he could not help himself; he felt as though he was fairly brimming-over with love, and he could not contain himself from letting it show upon his face, erstwhile sappiness be damned.

"In that case," Legolas said, his damp gaze dancing suddenly with dry mischief, "let me get you out of that tunic and into our bed and I will find all your other wrinkles and properly express my love for them, too."

Gimli decided he could finish his braids later.

[gregoftom]

oh ok