#anyway. will probably delete this! i am just seeing so many stupid takes dear god

[kazz-brekker]

mega downside of the fire & blood story being introduced to a wider audience through hotd is having to see people say the most rancid and/or ridiculous takes about the characters and the story with their whole entire chest

[saiilorstars]

Stars Dance

Ch. 16: The Imaginary Fairy Tale Man

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 11th Doctor x Original Female Character

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Chapter summary: Big Bang Two is coming! The Doctor’s plans will hopefully restore the world and give Avalon and Amy their rightful lives back but before that, of course, Avalon remembers what else she’s forgotten. 

(Previous chapters)

Fairy Tale Memoirs (Companion story)

Amelia Pond was knelt down on the side of her bed, praying just like she tended to do every night as of late. "Dear Santa, thank you for the dolls and pencils and the fish. It's Easter now, so I hope I didn't wake you. But honest, it is an emergency. There's a crack in my wall..." she opened one eye to look at the crack on her bedroom wall. Even just looking at it gave her a tingle on her back, a scary tingle. "Aunt Sharon says it's just an ordinary crack, but... I know it's not-"

"-cos it's not," another voice cut into Amelia's prayer. "There's voices on the other side. So, it's not a regular crack."

Amelia opened both her eyes to look at her friend, Avalon Reynolds, sitting on her bed and brushing a Barbie doll's hair. "Then how come you don't back me up when I tell aunt Sharon?"

Avalon put the Barbie doll down and looked at the crack. She tilted her head at it, letting her curly ginger locks fall to one side. "Because we're just kids. No one is going to believe that the crack isn't normal. My parents don't."

"But you're their little girl," Amelia insisted, "The only girl they've got, only child. Maybe if you kept insisting," Amelia sighed.

"They think it's another story," Avalon returned her attention to her Barbie. She didn't bother about the crack anymore because every time she brought it up, her parents told her to leave it alone. A stupid crack wasn't worth the lectures about keeping a low profile and it definitely wasn't worth the time-outs. So what if there were voices behind the crack - they weren't getting out anyways.

The sound of a gushing wind interrupted little Avalon's thoughts and made both girls hurry to the window. They looked out to the garden and saw nothing outside.

Amelia looked up at the moon in the sky and frowned. "Do you ever feel like something's missing up there?" she asked.

"Dunno," Avalon shrugged, looking up to the empty sky. Only the moon was there to illuminate the darkness. "I think there needs to be stars up there. Like the Star cults. Something is missing and barely anyone realizes it," she moved back to Amelia's bed and resumed brushing the Barbie doll's hair.

Amelia looked between the empty sky and Avalon, more inclined to believe her friend than anyone else as Avalon always had a knack for saying the right things when no one else could.

But then again, everyone also thought Avalon just made stories up a lot. She liked fairy tales, so maybe the stars were part of her fantasy worlds.

~ 0 ~

A couple days later, Amelia was once again forced to see a psychiatrist due to her belief in stars. Her aunt Sharon had, had enough and called in the woman, Christine, to try and get some sense into Amelia.

Right now, Christine was studying a painting Amelia had made of the night sky, "It's a lovely painting, Amelia. And what are all these?" she pointed at the yellow stars on Amelia's painting.

"Stars," Amelia shrugged.

Her aunt Sharon, who sat beside Christine, bowed her head with a deep sigh, "Oh, Amelia!"

Christine made a motion with her hand for Sharon to calm, "Tell you what, shall we go outside?" she suggested to them.

The two adult women brought Amelia to the backyard where they made her look up at the sky.

"What do you see, Amelia?" Christine asked her.

"The moon," she saw the big, bright gray moon lighting up the dark sky.

"And what else?"

"Just the dark."

"But no stars," Christine made sure to emphasize that, "If there were stars up there, we'd be able to see them, wouldn't we? Amelia, look at me," she turned Amelia to face her, "You know this is all just a story, don't you? You know there's no such thing as stars."

"But my friend Avalon says it could be!" Amelia shook her head and went inside the house, irritated that no one understood her like Avalon did.

After being sent to bed, Amelia laid on her bed and listened to her aunt and Christine talking about her 'issue'. Amelia got out of bed and made her way to the staircase, staying just at the top where she could hear the adults talking clearer.

"It's quite common, actually. Throughout history, people have talked about stars in the sky," Christine was saying, "God knows where it comes from."

"I just don't want her growing up and joining one of those Star Cults," Sharon said back, "I don't like that Avalon Reynolds very much. She keeps putting these crazy ideas in Amelia's head," she sighed.

Amelia frowned when she heard her aunt speaking about Avalon. No one seemed to like the fact that Avalon was different than other little girls. She said odd things, Amelia was the first to admit, but it wasn't automatically bad. Avalon did make some sense when it came to the stars and the cracks. Amelia knew Avalon had to be right in some sense, and that's why she continued being friends despite the reluctance of everyone else.

Just as Amelia moved to return to her bedroom, she heard something at the front door and saw a slip of paper being skid through the letter slot on the door. Amelia ran down the stairs and picked up the paper off the floor, seeing it was a brochure for the National Museum. She opened it up and saw one of the attractions of the museum, a Pandorica box or something, had been circled in red ink. And, on the back, Amelia saw a note reading, 'Come along, Pond' for her.

~ 0 ~

As much as Amelia had insisted to Avalon that they should both go to the museum together and see who and what had requested for Amelia to go, Avalon refused. She knew Amelia's aunt didn't really like her that much and preferred to stay away for the day. So, Amelia had gone to the National Museum with her aunt and had gone straight to the Pandorica room where the box laid in all its glory. She'd managed to slip away from her aunt and saw another note on the Pandorica, also written in the same red ink from the brochure, telling her to stick around. She ended up hiding in a nearby exhibit, successfully avoiding her aunt who had been searching for her all over the museum, going as far as making an announcement over the tannoy of the building to get her to come out.

When it was safe to come out, Amelia emerged from the exhibit she'd been hiding in and headed back into the Pandorica room. She went under the cord around the box and removed the note left for her. She placed a palm on the box and looked at it, gasping when he started glowing a bright green. She quickly moved back as the box started opening up. She covered her eyes as a blinding white light took over the room.

Once the light died down, Amelia looked again just as the box finished opening and came face to face with her older self, "Okay, kid. This is where it gets complicated," Amy took a breath.

~ 0 ~

In the Past...

Rory, the Plastic Centurion who'd managed to stay alive after the fiasco with other soldiers, had opened up the Pandorica with the Doctor's screwdriver, given to him by a future Doctor.

"How did you do that?" the current Doctor was staring at Rory in amazement.

"You gave me this," Rory waved the screwdriver in his hand.

"No, I didn't," the Doctor stepped out of the Pandorica and pulled out his own screwdriver to show he wasn't lying.

"You did. Look at it."

The Doctor held his screwdriver to the one Rory held and both men flinched as the two screwdrivers sparked, "Temporal energy. Same screwdriver, at different points in its own time stream. Which means it was me who gave it to you," the Doctor smiled, "Me from the future. I've got a future, that's nice," his eyes wandered behind Rory to see the remains of the enemies that'd locked him up, "That's not," he pointed at a Dalek.

"Yeah," Rory had ignored the creatures as they were a bit spooky, "What are they?"

"History has collapsed. Whole races have been deleted from existence. These are just like after-images. Echoes, fossils in time. The footprints of the never-were."

"Er, what does that mean?"

"Total event collapse. The universe literally never happened."

"So, how can we be here? What's keeping us safe?"

"Nothing," the Doctor shrugged as he took a better look around the room, "Eye of the storm, that's all. We're just the last light to go out. Amy. Where's Amy?"

~ 0 ~

Rory had brought the Doctor to Amy's body above ground, a blanket covering her, "I killed her," he shuddered a breath at his words. He hadn't meant to, it was literally in his programming to do so. He was Rory now, he was, but what ever had brought him back had been in control and that was what forced him to shoot...and unfortunately Amy had payed the price.

"Oh, Rory," the Doctor sighed, not too surprised of it.

"Doctor, what am I?" Rory dared to ask, needing to know what made him shoot his own fiancee.

"You're a Nestene duplicate. A lump of plastic with delusions of humanity," the Doctor started using the screwdriver on Amy to check for her vitals.

"But I'm Rory now. Whatever was happening, it's stopped. I'm Rory!"

"That's software talking."

Rory rolled his eyes, "Can you help her?" he moved closer, "Is there anything you can do?"

"Yeah, probably, if I had the time," the Doctor shrugged as he stood up, taking a

step over Amy's body.

"The time!?" Rory watched the man move away from them.

"All of creation has just been wiped from the sky. Do you know how many lives now never happened?" the Doctor continued his charade of indifference, "All the people who never lived? Your girlfriend isn't more important than the whole universe."

Rory marched over and whipped the Doctor around to give him a punch in the face, satisfied to see the alien knocked to the ground, "She is to me!" he shouted.

The Doctor just laughed as he stood back up, rubbing his face where he'd been punched, "Welcome back, Rory Williams! Sorry, had to be sure. Hell of a gun-arm you're packing there. Right, we need to get her downstairs. And take that look off your plastic face. You're getting married in the morning!"

Together, they'd brought Amy down the Pandorica and placed her inside the box, the screwdriver Rory had been given by the future Doctor tucked in her front pocket as had been instructed.

"So you've got a plan, then?" Rory hoped as he watched the final restrains lock on Amy.

"Bit of a plan, yeah. Memories are more powerful than you think, and Amy Pond is not an ordinary girl. Grew up with a time crack in her wall. The universe pouring through her dreams every night. The Nestenes took a memory print of her and got more than they bargained for. Like you. Not just your face, but your heart and your soul," the Doctor put his hands on either side of Amy's face and closed his eyes for a moment, "I'm leaving her a message for when she wakes up, so she knows what's happening," once finished, he stepped back and locked the ginger girl in the Pandorica.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Rory nearly pushed him again, "What are you doing?"

"Saving her," the Doctor stopped him before he did anything rash, "This is the ultimate prison. You can't even escape by dying. It forces you to stay alive."

"But she's already dead," Rory frowned.

"Mostly dead. The Pandorica can stasis-lock her that way. All it needs is a scan of her living DNA and it'll restore her."

"Where's it going to get that?"

The Doctor checked his watch, "In about 2,000 years."

"She's going to be in that box for 2,000 years?!" Rory nearly fell forwards at the answer, "What!?"

"Yeah, but we're taking a shortcut. River's vortex manipulator," the Doctor had pulled out a manipulator from River's bag and was strapping it on to his wrist, "Rubbish way to time travel, but the universe is tiny now. We'll be fine."

"So the future's still there, then?" Rory tried to wrap his mind around this wonky plan, "Our world?"

"A version of it. Not quite the one you know. Earth alone in the sky. Let's go and have a look," the Doctor held his arm out for Rory, the manipulator set to go, "You put your hand there. Don't worry, should be safe."

"That's not what I'm worried about."

The Doctor looked at the Pandorica and sighed, "She'll be fine. Nothing can get into this box."

"You got in there."

"Well, there's only one of me. I counted."

Rory couldn't find it in him to leave Amy alone and so shook his head, "This box needs a guard. I killed the last one."

"No. Rory, no. Don't even think about it," the Doctor pointed as the human moved towards the box again.

"She'll be all alone," Rory tried to say.

"She won't feel it!"

"You bet she won't!"

"2,000 years, Rory," the Doctor reminded, "You won't even sleep, you'd be conscious every second. It would drive you mad."

"Will she be safer if I stay?" Rory looked at him, dead serious, "Look me in the eye and tell me she wouldn't be safer."

"Rory..."

"Answer me!"

"Yes," the Doctor finally gave the answer, "Obviously."

"Then how could I leave her?"

"Why do you have to be so...human?" the Doctor bowed his head, not upset simply fascinated of the matter.

"Because right now, I'm not," Rory answered and walked to the other side of the Pandorica. The Doctor gave up and started setting up the manipulator.

"Listen to me. This is the last bit of advice you're going to get in a very long time. You're living plastic, but not immortal," he began his warnings, "I have no idea how long you'll last. And you're not indestructible. Stay away from heat and radio signals when they come along. You can't heal, or repair yourself. Any damage is permanent. So, for God's sake, however bored you get, stay out of..." but he disappeared before he could finish his sentence.

Rory picked up his helmet and put it on, taking his sword from its place and held it to his side as he began his long vigil.

~ 0 ~

The Doctor appeared right in the middle of a fiasco concerning a Dalek and two gingers, "Trouble..." he finished his sentence, "Oh!" he looked back to see two Ponds, "Two of you?" he mused, "Complicated."

"Exterminate! 'Weapons systems restoring," the Dalek ahead of them was coming closer to the Pandorica room.

'Come along, Ponds," the Doctor took both gingers by the hand and ran to hiding by the Pandorica box.

"Exterminate!"

The Doctor stopped at an alcove display and nearly fell on a mannequin. He picked up a falling fez and put it on.

"What are we doing?" Amy looked around, hoping to find another way out before the Dalek caught them.

"Running into a dead end, where I'll have a brilliant plan, that basically involves not being in one," the Doctor grinned.

"What's going on?" a watchman called, the group able to see a bit of a torch shining into the room.

The Doctor and the Ponds moved to hide behind the Pandorica, "Get out of here," he told Amy, "Go! Just run!" but the ginger woman refused to go anywhere.

"Drop the device," the Dalek turned on the watchman.

"It's not a weapon," the Doctor called to them before the watchman was hurt, "Scan it. It's not a weapon, and you don't have the power to waste!"

"Scans indicate intruder unarmed."

The watchman scoffed, "Do you think?" he dropped his torch and held his hand out, his index fingers opening down to reveal a gun that fired on the Dalek's eyestalk.

"Vision impaired! Vision... "

The watchman stepped into the Pandorica room where the group was able to see it was RORY.

"Amy?" he breathed at the sight of her as she and the others came around the box.

"Rory!" Amy ran straight to him, nearly knocking him down with her hug.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. It just happened," Rory started apologizing as the ginger clung to him.

"Oh, Shut up," Amy rolled her eyes and kissed him.

"Yeah, shut up, cos we've got to go," the Doctor came up to them and sighed when they kept kissing, "Come on!"

Rory pulled away and smiled at Amy, "I waited. 2,000 years, I waited for you."

"No, still shut up," Amy resumed their kiss.

"And break! And breathe!" the Doctor nearly flapped his arms to get their attention back, "Well, somebody didn't get out much for 2,000 years," he muttered in the end.

Amelia tugged on his sleeve, "I'm thirsty," she frowned, "Can I get a drink?"

The Doctor let out a big breath, "Oh, it's all mouths today, isn't it?!" he put the fez he'd taken on her head but she shoved it back to him, still waiting for her drink. He shook his head and looked back at the Dalek, "The light! The light from the Pandorica, it must have hit the Dalek," the Dalek started moving its weapon, "Out! Out! Out!" he took Amelia's hand and pushed the snogging pair in front of them out into the hallway.

He and Rory closed the door and the Doctor pulled out his screwdriver to keep it locked, "So, 2,000 years. How did you do?" he genuinely wondered as he glanced at Rory.

"Kept out of trouble," Rory shrugged.

"Oh," the Doctor realized he still had the fez and placed it back on his head, "How?"

"Unsuccessfully," Rory walked to Amy. The Doctor nodded and picked up a nearby mop for the doors, "The mop!" Rory made him jump, "That's how you looked all those years ago when you gave me the sonic."

"Ah! Well, no time to lose then," the Doctor used the manipulator and disappeared. A couple seconds later he reappeared to put the mop through the door handles as another lock and then disappeared once again.

"How can he do that?" Amelia blinked as the man kept disappearing and coming back, "Is he magic?"

The Doctor finally appeared again and ran for the stairs, "Right, let's go then. Wait! Now I don't have the sonic, I just gave it to Rory 2,000 years ago," and off he went again. Seconds later he reappeared and reached over to Amy and pulled out his screwdriver from her pocket, "Off we go! No, hang on," he moved to Amelia, "How did you know to come here?" Amelia took out the museum brochure and held it out for him, "Ah, my handwriting. OK!" the Doctor ran for the stands of brochures then to a desk across, getting everything he needed for the note and disappeared. He reappeared moments later with a drink for Amelia, "There you go, drink up!" he handed it to her then continued his way up the stairs.

'What is that?" Amy shook her head, a bit dizzy after that.

"Vortex manipulator...cheap and nasty time travel," the Doctor shrugged, "Very bad for you. I'm trying to give it up."

"Where are we going?"

"The roof."

Suddenly, they saw another flash of light where another Doctor appeared at the top of the stairs, his jacket smoking and skin charcoiled. He toppled down the stairs until he came to a stop beside the current Doctor. Quickly, the current Doctor used his screwdriver on him while the humans rushed to them.

"Doctor, it's you. How can it be you?" Rory looked between both aliens.

"Doctor, is that you?" Amy was hesitant to accept such a thing.

"Yeah, it's me," the Doctor put away his screwdriver, "Me from the future."

The future Doctor snapped open his eyes and grabbed the current Doctor, whispering something in his ear before falling to the floor again, unconscious.

Amy's eyes widened as she saw the action, "Are you...I mean, is he...is he dead?"

The Doctor remained silent for a moment, "What?" he shook his head to snap himself out and stood up, "Yes, yes. Of course he's dead. Right, I've got 12 minutes, that's good," he started up the stairs again.

"12 minutes to live?" Amy stopped him again, "How is that good?"

"You can do loads in 12 minutes... suck a mint, buy a sledge, have a fast bath. Come on, the roof!"

"We can't leave you here, dead," Rory frowned.

"Oh, good! Are you in charge now? So, tell me, what are we going to do about Amelia?" the Doctor looked at where Amelia had originally been at, only her drink left on the floor as evidence.

However, the two humans didn't seem to understand she was gone forever as they started down the stairs searching for her.

"Where did she go?" Amy frowned and looked back at the Doctor.

"Amelia?" Rory shouted for the girl.

"There is no Amelia. From now on, there never was," the Doctor informed, making both look back, "History is still collapsing."

"How can I be here, if she's not?" Amy gestured to herself, as if doubting his words.

"You're an anomaly. We all are. We're all hanging on at the eye of the storm, but the eye is closing, and if we don't do something, reality will never have happened. Today, just dying is a result. Now, come on!"

~ 0 ~

Eventually, the group made it up to the roof where it was visibly daylight now. Amy looked around as if she was being tricked, "How did morning happen?" she questioned.

"History is shrinking. Is anybody listening to me?" the Doctor rolled his eyes as he headed for a satellite dish, "Universe is collapsing. We don't have much time left."

"What are you doing?" Rory raised an eyebrow as the Doctor pulled the dish off its place with the screwdriver.

"Looking for the TARDIS."

"But the TARDIS exploded."

"OK, then. I'm looking for an exploding TARDIS," the Doctor rolled his eyes again at his technicality and moved to the edge of the roof.

"I don't understand," Amy followed him, "So, the TARDIS blew up and took the universe with it. Why would it do that? How?"

"Good question for another day," the Doctor raised the dish up to the sky, "But for now... total event collapse means that every star in the universe never happened. Not one of them ever shone. So, if all the stars that ever were are gone...what is that?" he made both humans look at a fireball in the sky. Both Amy and Rory exchanged quick, confused glances before looking at the Doctor again. "Like I said, I'm looking for an exploding TARDIS."

"But that's the sun," Rory blinked, though now he wasn't so sure that's what it was.

"Is it? Here's the noise that 'sun' is making right now," the Doctor amplified the light noises to make them see it was the TARDIS. "That's my TARDIS burning up. That's what's been keeping the Earth warm."

Rory listened closer and shook his head, "Doctor, there's something else. There's a voice-er, scream."

The Doctor frowned and adjusted the settings of his screwdriver to get a better sound.

"I can't hear anything," Amy tapped her ears.

"Trust the plastic," Rory nodded.

Then they heard the voice Rory was talking about, all recognizing it instantaneously, "Fairy Tale Man, where are you?" Avalon kept asking on a loop before screaming.

"That's Ava!" Rory nearly shouted, "Doctor, that is Ava and she is not here! Where is she!?"

"The emergency protocols..." the Doctor gasped lightly. He hated himself for not realizing it sooner. "The TARDIS has sealed off the control room and put Avalon and River into a time loop to save them. They're right at the heart of the explosion."

Of course that's where Avalon would be, right where the action was happening. He would roll his eyes at how typical that was if he didn't feel himself panicking from head to toe. First of all, he was supposed to keep her away from River and that clearly wasn't happening right now. Second of all, she was literally in the middle of an explosion. That's nowhere near what he promised her she would see if she came along with him. You promised her she and her sister would travel together and you failed in that too. He did. But he wouldn't let Avalon follow in Lena's fate. He long ago made that promise to himself and he would make sure to fulfill no matter what.

He needed to go pick her up right now.

~ 0 ~

River connected wires on the console, ignoring the sparks and small explosions as best as she could. Time was of the essence and she needed to her and Avalon out of this mess. When she thought the work was more or less done, she looked up and gave a nod to Avalon. "Try it Avalon!"

Avalon swallowed hard and dashed towards the doors. She didn't know what the hell was going on but she trusted River, despite the Doctor's clear reservations about her. She flung the doors open only to come face to face with a stone wall. Her heart dropped. "Fairy Tale Man, where are you?" she stepped back and turned around in time to see River attempting one more try on the console before it exploded with a bright light. Avalon screamed from its might.

The loop started over again and Avalon once more ran for the doors after River gave her the go. Only this time, the Doctor appeared in front of the doors. "Any princess in need of saving?" he looked around like nothing was going on.

Avalon gave a hearty laugh at the sight of him. She ran towards him, jumping to hug him. "You came!"

"Always will," he reassured her for future references. "Are you okay? Nothing hurts?"

"I'm fine!" Avalon pulled away but kept her arms looped around his neck as if he would disappear in that second.

River smiled at them from the console. "You're late!" she cut through their moment to point out.

"Oh, criticism!" the Doctor rolled his eyes. "I was a little tied up. Well, trapped actually. I tried my best! Now c'mon!" River left the console in a sprint. "Hang on, please!"

"Avalon's taking care of that," River made a gesture to Avalon's arms around the Doctor's neck, giving them both a teasing grin. It was actually quite amusing the way they both shared the same blushes. How they got into sync like that, River would never understand.

The three soon disappeared and re-appeared on the rooftop where Amy and Rory waited.

"Amy! And the plastic Centurion?" River eyed the pair curiously.

"Rory!" Avalon ran up to her best friend and hugged him, "My Rory! You're my best friend!" she laughed.

"And there's no one else you've, uh...remembered?" Rory pulled away, happy to see her alright but there was still that blank face on Avalon that just didn't settle with him. How could she forget Lena like this?

"Why do you ask?" Avalon stepped back and looked at the others, noticing a similar expression on each of their faces, "What is it?"

"Nothing," the Doctor answered while looking at Rory, nearly forcing him to stay away from the topic of Lena.

Rory frowned, disagreeing with the Doctor's decision. Lena was Avalon's sister, she deserved to be remembered at the least!

River sensed the tension growing between the group and stepped in between them, "Right then, I have questions," she tried distracting, "But number one is this: what in the name of sanity have you got on your head?" she pointed at the red rez the Doctor wore on his head.

"It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool," the Doctor grinned happily.

River looked at Avalon with a smirk, silently agreeing on what was going to happen next. Avalon snatched the fez from the Doctor's head and threw it into the sky where it was shot and destroyed by River.

"Oh!" the Doctor pouted, his head feeling lonely now.

"Next time can I shoot?" Avalon asked River, already eyeing River's blaster with plans.

"Exterminate!" the group turned to see the Dalek they'd left now hovering on the side of the building.

The Doctor forgot about his fez and hurried the others back to the stairwell entrance, "Run, run, move, move. Go! Come on!" after covering everyone with the satellite dish, the Dalek firing as soon as it had the chance, the Doctor was the last to climb down to the stairwell.

"Doctor, come on," River hurried as she kept an aim on the hatch, the others just behind her.

"Shh. It's moving away, finding another way in," the Doctor quieted her down after using the screwdriver to lock the hatch. He jumped down, "It needs to restore its power before it can attack again. Now, that means we've got exactly four and a half minutes before it's at lethal capacity."

"How do you know that?" Avalon followed him down the stairs.

"Because that's when it's due to kill me."

"Kill you?" Avalon and River looked at each other with confusion while Amy and Rory simply sighed behind them.

"What do you mean, 'kill' you?" Avalon insisted seeing as the Doctor had made more of a haste down the stairs, "Oi!" she called.

"Oh, shut up, never mind," he waved her off, unaware of the glare she now had on him, "How can that Dalek even exist?" they entered a hallway, "It was erased from time and then it came back. How?"

"You said the light from the Pandorica..." Rory reminded but was cut off.

"It's not a light, it's a restoration field, but never mind. Call it a light. That light brought Amy back, but how could it bring back a Dalek when the Daleks have never existed?"

"Okay, tell us," Amy motioned with a hand for him to keep going, no one surprised he'd just been playing the moment even more.

"When the TARDIS blew up, it caused a total event collapse. A time explosion. It blasted every atom in every moment of the universe. Except..."

"Except inside the Pandorica."

"The perfect prison. Inside it, perfectly preserved, a few billion atoms of the universe as it was. In theory, you could extrapolate the whole universe from a single one of them, like cloning a body from a single cell. And we've got the bumper family pack."

"No, too fast, I'm not getting it," Rory made a face.

The Doctor sighed and turned back for a moment, "The box contains a memory of the universe, and the light transmits the memory. And that's how we're going to do it."

"Do what, exactly?" Avalon crossed her arms, sharing the misunderstanding with Rory.

"Relight the fire. Reboot the universe. Come on!" the Doctor exclaimed and continued down the hallway.

River, who'd understood perfectly the 'plan', hurried after him, "Doctor, you're being completely ridiculous. The Pandorica partially restored one Dalek. If it can't even reboot a single life form properly, how will it reboot the whole of reality?"

"What if we give it a moment of infinite power?" the Doctor shrugged, "Transmit the light from the Pandorica to every particle of space and time simultaneously?"

"Well, that would be lovely, dear, but we can't, because it's completely impossible!"

"Ah, no, you see, it's not," he tapped her on the forehead, "It's almost completely impossible. One spark is all we need."

"For what?"

"Big Bang Two!" he cheered, "Now listen..." he didn't get the chance to explain the plan in the detail as the Dalek had reappeared and shot him from the back.

"Exterminate! Exterminate!" the Dalek headed for them.

The Doctor had collapsed to the floor in the smokey appearance Amy and Rory had seen twelve minutes ago. Rory made sure everyone else was behind him as he shot the Dalek once more in the eyestalk, draining its energy for another while.

"What do we do?" Avalon knelt beside River, scared out of her mind. "Is he going to do that face-change thing?"

"Not enough energy hit him for that," River assured her, "Doctor, it's me, River. Can you hear me? What is it? What do you need?"

The Doctor didn't answer anyone, instead reaching to his manipulator on his wrist and activating it, disappearing from the group.

"Where did he go?" River looked around, "Damn it, he could be anywhere."

Amy shook her head as the two women stood up, "He went downstairs. 12 minutes ago."

"Show me!"

"River, he died."

"If he died he wouldn't have randomly gone twelve minutes into the past," Avalon refused to believe any such thing involving the Doctor's death. That just wasn't possible. "Clearly, he had a plan that didn't involve telling any of us."

"Systems restoring! You will be exterminated!" the Dalek began to stir again.

"Oh shut up!" Avalon turned to the blasted Dalek in anger.

"Not the time, Ava," Rory quickly stopped her before her temper grew, "We've got to move. That thing's coming back to life."

"Well someone's got to shoot that thing dead," Avalon glared at the creature.

"All of you go to the Doctor," River instructed them, "I'll be right with you."

"What are you going to do?" Avalon looked back at her.

"Exactly what it deserves," River nodded for them to all leave.

Avalon sighed but let Amy and Rory lead her towards the Pandorica room. Upon seeing the Doctor's body not on the stairs as had been twelve minutes ago, Amy and Rory started searching for the missing alien.

"What's going on?" Avalon frowned, coming up behind them and seeing only a jacket on the floor.

"He's moved," Rory explained and ran down the remaining steps, "How could he have moved? He was dead! Doctor? Doctor!"

"But he was dead!" Amy exclaimed.

"Like I said, he must have lied," Avalon rolled her eyes and moved down the remaining steps as well. "That's like one of his rules, remember?"

"No, he was dead, we saw him," Amy insisted, but Avalon shook her head in refusal.

"Who told you that?" River joined them, looking calm as ever despite having blasted a Dalek to pieces seconds ago.

"He did."

"Rule one. The Doctor lies."

"Told you," Avalon told Amy with a hint of triumph lacing her tone. "So, where's the Dalek?"

"It died," she answered darkly and entered the exhibit hall leading to the Pandorica room.

They could all see the Doctor sitting inside the Pandorica box, unconscious they assumed. They ran into the room and River went straight to the Doctor to check what exactly he'd been doing.

"Why did he tell us he was dead?" Rory frowned, not appreciating they'd been crudely lied to.

"A diversion," Avalon sighed, "Told you," she looked at them, "How is it that I figured that out in less than ten minutes when you've been here longer than I have? As long as the Dalek was chasing us, he could work down here."

"Doctor, can you hear me?" River was asking the Doctor, clapping his face repeatedly to get a response form him. "What were you doing?"

"What's happening?" Rory looked up at the small window above them when the room became lighted with yellow and orange from the 'fireball' in the sky.

"Reality's collapsing," River called to them, "It's speeding up. Look at this room."

The trio looked around and saw every single display was empty.

"Where did everything go?" Amy frowned.

"History is being erased. Time is running out," River sighed and focused on the Doctor again, "Doctor, what were you doing? Tell us! Doctor?"

"Big... Bang... Two," he slowly came around.

"The Big Bang is the beginning of the universe," Avalon relayed, "Is that supposed to be like the 'reboot' thing you were talking about?" he slowly nodded, "Is that even possible?" she frowned.

"Oh!" the answer came from River, "Oh, that's good," she started to smile.

"What?" Amy asked.

"The TARDIS is still burning. It's exploding at every point in history. If you threw the Pandorica into the explosion, right into the heart of the fire..."

"Then what?"

"Then let there be light. The light from the Pandorica would explode everywhere at once, just like he said."

"That would work?" Avalon raised an eyebrow, "That would bring everything back?"

"A restoration field, powered by an exploding TARDIS, happening at every moment in history. Oh, that's brilliant. It might even work!" River let a small laugh and took out the Doctor's screwdriver, "He's wired the vortex manipulator to the rest of the box."

"Why?" Rory asked.

"So he can take it with him," River realized and looked back at the Doctor, still barely unconscious, "He's going to fly the Pandorica into the heart of the explosion."

~ 0 ~

After being sent out of the Pandorica room so the Doctor could finish his work in the Pandorica box, the human faction started witnessing even more displays being emptied out by collapsing time. While Amy and Rory comforted each other, Avalon stood to the side in deep thought. Eventually, Rory noticed and felt like he could nearly guess why she was so silent and thoughtful.

"Ava," Rory quietly called, leaving Amy for just a moment. He knew that the Doctor said not to tell Avalon anything but she had the right to know, and he wouldn't feel right about hiding poor Lena from her twin sister.

Avalon looked over at him, "I still can't believe you're back," she admitted with a small smile.

"You and me both," he agreed and they shared a small laugh. He glanced at Avalon for a minute, debating one last time whether or not he should go through with it and tell her the truth.

"You know, now I understand why my journal had those empty lines in the middle of my writing," she beat him to it, "I kept thinking and thinking of why I would do something like that: leave blank lines in my pages. I knew I was forgetting something and that something turned out to be you," she looked at him again, her smile brightening, "Why Vincent said he was sorry for my losses," Rory gave him a look for that, "I met Vincent Van Gogh a while back. I also met Zelda Sayre Fitzgerald. I knew I forgot something...and I guess my mind was trying to give me some clues."

"But...wait a minute," Rory also caught another word, "Van Gogh said 'losses'," he watched Avalon stiffen at that, knowing she'd finally realized it too, "Meaning you didn't...lose just...me."

"No, but..." Avalon blinked, "The blank lines...those were because of you..." she turned to him, "...they had to be..." but as she studied the face Rory had she knew he was hiding something from her, "...Rory? What's going on?"

"Ava, I'm really sorry," Rory sighed.

"What's going on?" Avalon asked again and when she didn't get an answer she walked up to Amy, "Amy, do you know what Rory's been hiding?"

"What?" Amy raised an eyebrow, "No, I just...I just got him back," she reminded, "How could I know a secret of his?"

"Rory Arthur Williams you tell me what's going on right now!" Avalon stomped her foot and glared at her plastic best friend.

Rory turned to both gingers and took a deep breath, the words he was about to speak would surely cause some problems...

~ 0 ~

River emerged from the Pandorica room to gather two gingers but instead found Avalon with red eyes, barely able to stand, and Amy near to tears. River marched up to them and with hands on her hip, "What's going on here?"

"It's my fault," Rory sighed, unhappy with the results but knowing that in a long run it was better.

River shook her head, "Amy, Avalon, the Doctor wanted to talk to both of you, but..."

Avalon didn't wait for her to finish and stalked into the Pandorica room.

"Avalon!" Amy tried to go after her but was kept back by Rory, "We can't-"

"Just...just let her talk first," he pleaded, "She deserves to know."

"What happened?" River questioned again.

"Fine," Amy huffed and moved up to River, "Why don't you tell us what happens here instead?" she said to River, "Big Bang Two? What happens to us?"

River sighed, "We all wake up where we ought to be. None of this ever happens and we don't remember it."

"River... tell me he comes back, too."

"The Doctor will be the heart of the explosion," River looked down.

"So?"

"So all the cracks in time will close, but he'll be on the wrong side...trapped in the never-space, the void between the worlds. All memory of him will be purged from the universe. He will never have been born."

"Oh...that's it?" Amy swallowed hard, barely managing a sarcastic tone.

"I'm sorry," was all River could say.

~ 0 ~

Avalon gradually slowed as she walked towards the Pandorica. The Doctor noticed her expression and knew it wasn't because of him, and the only other thing that could make her react like that would be...

"Her name was Lena," Avalon said quietly, her voice shaking with each step she took. "She was my twin sister and I...I can't even remember her," Avalon stopped before him, her eyes ready to spill fresh new tears, "Rory told me all about her and I can't remember anything."

"Subconsciously you did," he tried to help, "The strawberry hot chocolate, that was her favorite drink."

"Oh, goody, I remembered her favorite drink but not her," she gritted her teeth, "I still can't remember her. And do you know what's the worst thing? That I knew, I knew that I'd forgotten something and I've had memories but I can't actually see her! I can't see her! Why? Amy has zero idea who Lena is, she never had any idea that she'd forgotten someone...but I did. I knew that I forgot Rory, and I knew that I'd forgotten Lena...why?"

"I really wish I knew, Ava," the Doctor honestly said, lamenting the fact he would probably never understand what gave Avalon that ability. "I don't know why your subconscious fought harder. It's like you said the first night you came with me: your brain is wired differently."

"Ruddy brain," Avalon muttered bitterly. She folded her arms over her chest.

"Beautiful, intelligent brain!"

Avalon rolled her eyes at him. "No time for compliments here! I want to remember Lena, I want...I want to remember all the times we shared. She existed and she deserves to be remembered."

"I've got news for you, Avalon Reynolds. Would you like to hear it?" the Doctor knew that despite her feelings, she wouldn't resist not hearing what he had to say.

"...what is it?"

He smiled weakly at her. "You're going to see Lena again. My sweet baby sister is going to be alive again."

"How?"

"Big Bang," he whispered with a small cheerful tone, actually making Avalon chuckle a little.

"How, though? What are you physically going to do here?" Avalon's eyes studied the wires he'd connected from his manipulator to the Pandorica. It looked rather painful and he already seemed so weak.

"He's going to take the Pandorica into the exploding TARDIS and seal every crack up while leaving himself stuck on the wrong side," Amy entered the room.

"What?" Avalon frowned, looking at Amy as she joined her.

"Such a 'you' thing to do by the way," Amy looked at the Doctor with a sigh.

"But you can't do that," Avalon shook her head at him, "I want Lena back but...I don't want to lose you either."

"Well, isn't that nice to hear," the Doctor smiled, "Am I finally a friend?"

"What?" Avalon laughed in a confused manner, "What kind of question is that? You were always a friend. I mean, you were Amy's 'imaginary friend'," the two gingers shared a moment of laughter at their childhood ideas, "And you were the Fairy Tale Man for me. I, actually, um, wrote short stories about you..." she blushed with embarrassment.

"Yeah, I read them," Amy muttered.

Avalon's mouth dropped open, "What!?" she turned to Amy, "How dare you!?"

"We were ten, give it up," Amy rolled her eyes.

"Well," Avalon huffed and crossed her arms, "And here I thought I had friends who respected privacy."

Amy rolled her eyes again, "Yeah, yeah, ten years old," she emphasized their young age then sighed, "Anyways," she looked at the Doctor again, "What Avalon was trying to say was that we don't want to lose you."

"And I'm touched, I really am," the Doctor nodded. At least he knew that he'd completed his little challenge with Avalon and became a true friend; and, he felt very happy about it, "However, there are some things you've yet to see. Example number one, Amy: your house was too big. That big, empty house. And just you."

"And Aunt Sharon," she reminded, seeing no relevancy in it.

"Where were your mum and dad? Where was... everybody who lived in that big house?"

"I lost my Mum and Dad."

"How? What happened to them? Where did they go?"

"I... I don't..." Amy began faltering the more she thought about her parents. She looked at Avalon for help, seeing as they'd known each other since they were in diapers nearly, "...Avalon?"

"I don't, I don't remember," Avalon shrugged as she thought as well, "I just remember..." she closed her eyes, focusing hard.

"It's OK. Don't panic," the Doctor said to them, "It's not your fault."

"I don't even remember," Amy gasped at the realization.

"There was a crack in time in the wall of your bedroom and it's been eating away at your life for a long time now. Amy Pond, all alone in that house. The girl who didn't make sense. How could I resist?"

"How could I just forget?"

"Nothing is ever forgotten, not really. But you have to try."

The ground started shaking underneath them. River ran into the room urgently, "Doctor! It's speeding up!"

Amy returned the Doctor's screwdriver into his pocket and sighed.

"There's going to be a very big bang. Big Bang Two," the Doctor began, "Try and remember your family and they'll be there. And, maybe even remember my baby sister?"

"How can I remember them if they never existed?" Amy looked at Avalon, "You'd be better at this than me!"

"You're special, Amy," the Doctor assured, "That crack in your wall, all that time, the universe pouring into your head. You brought Rory back...you can bring everyone else back, too. You just remember, and they'll be there."

"You won't," Amy countered, taking Avalon's hand and backing away from him.

"That's not any better," Avalon added.

"You'll have your families back," he smiled, "You won't need your imaginary friend nor a Fairy Tale Man any more. Avalon Reynolds, Amy Pond... crying over me, eh? Guess what?"

"What?" both gingers sniffled.

"Gotcha!"

The Pandorica closed and began glowing until it launched into the sky.

"Back! Get back!" River pulled both gingers into a corner of the room with Rory, all gathering together as the shaking increased. A couple seconds later River received a message from the Doctor in her communicator, "It's from the Doctor."

"What does it say?" Avalon peered over.

"Geronimo."

The room was taken over by a bright, white light...

~ 0 ~

Amy fluttered her eyes open to a bright morning. She slowly sat up and looked around her room, looking around the mess she had in it with her imaginary friend dolls and drawings. She really ought to clean that up seeing as she was about to get...

"Morning!" her mother, Tabetha, came into the room holding a breakfast tray in hand.

Amy, startled, looked at her with wide eyes, "You're my mum. Oh, my God, you're my mum."

"Well, of course I'm your mum. What's the matter with you?" Tabetha shook off her daughter's oddness for the moment, "And this is your breakfast, which your father made, so feel free to tip it out of the window if it's an atrocity. Downstairs, 10 minutes? Big day!" she cheered and hurried on out.

"Of course she's my mum. Why is that surprising?" Amy whispered to herself before jumping out of bed.

She ran down the stairs towards the living room where she was hearing a set of low mutters. It was her...father.

"Ah, Amelia. I fear I may have been using the same joke book as the best man," Augustus Pond turned to her with genuine concern.

"You're my tiny little dad!" Amy laughed and hurried up to hug him.

"Amelia, why are you behaving as if you've never seen us before?" Tabetha entered the room with confusion.

"I don't know. It's just..." but Amy laughed again and hugged them both.

~ 0 ~

Rory was brushing his teeth when he heard his phone ringing. He quickly answered, "Hello!"

"Do you feel like you've forgotten something really important?" Amy got straight to the point.

"Yep!"

"Do you feel like there's a great big thing in your head, and you feel like you should remember it, but you can't?"

"Yep!"

"Are you just saying yes cos you're scared of me?"

"Yep."

Amy rolled her eyes, "I love you."

"Yep," Rory shook his head, "I mean, I love you too!"

"I'm going to call Avalon, she'll understand!"

"Yep," Rory nodded, still with no idea what the conversation was about.

Amy shook her head and laughed before hanging up. She hung up and redialed again for the Reynolds', she would've dialed for Avalon's cellphone, but...she'd been punished.

She and Mel needed to stop getting into so much trouble.

~ 0 ~

"Hello?" a young, fourteen year old boy answered the phone.

"Gavin? Is Avalon around?" Amy asked.

"Yeah," Gavin picked at an orange strand of hair refusing to stay off his forehead. He kept blowing on it, prompting Amy to snap his name out.

"Gavin, pass the phone to Avalon!"

"Aren't you getting married?"

"Well, not if people won't take my phone call serious and just talk to me!" huffed Amy over the line.

Gavin pulled the phone from his ear and made a face. "You're weird, Amy. AVALON!"

~ 0 ~

Avalon was still in her pajamas with a robe on when her brother called for her. But she ignored it as she quietly tip-toed towards a room with an open door. She poked her head inside and saw a small brunette standing in front of a mirror with a salmon-pink dress on.

"Avalon, what is it?" Lena Reynolds turned to her with her hands on her hips.

Avalon felt the air leave her lungs at the sight of her twin sister. "Oh Lena!" She ran inside the room and hugged Lena so very tight. "Lena!"

"What...what is it?" Lena blinked with genuine confusion, still hugging her twin back however.

"You're my twin!" Avalon pulled away to look Lena over, "My smaller, serene twin!"

Lena laughed of confusion and shrugged, "Guess...I am," she looked at Avalon with concern, "Are you alright?" she put a hand on Avalon's forehead, "You haven't been writing too much in the journal of yours? I told you to go to sleep early last night!"

"Not this time," Avalon chuckled.

"Avalon!" Gavin ran inside the room holding the landline phone in his hand, "It's Amy!"

"Amy?" Avalon looked at Lena, "Isn't she getting married in about two hours?"

Lena nodded, "That was the rumor."

Avalon laughed and hugged her again, taking the phone and rushing off to her own room. Gavin frowned and looked at his other big sister, "What's wrong with her? She's weirder than usual."

"Don't be rude," Lena turned him around and walked him out of her room. "Now go finish getting ready."

"Yeah, yeah," the boy rolled his eyes and went on.

~ 0 ~

"Don't you feel like there's something missing?" Amy was asking Avalon while the ginger-twin ran a hand through her fairy tale books in her bookshelf.

"I get you," Avalon confessed as she pulled out one of her books, that of Sleeping Beauty in its French version - La Belle au bois dormant - by Charles Perrault, "Something at the tip of your tongue but never there," she skimmed through the pages of her book. Though it was French, she'd forced herself to learn what was on the pages. She could read it fluently.

"Yeah," Amy sighed, glad to know that once again Avalon understood her, "But no one understands!"

Avalon scoffed, "They all think you're crazy, Amy. I wouldn't insist to them."

"Yeah...I should go," Amy sighed again, "As always, thanks for understanding."

"No worries, see you later," Avalon hung up and chucked the phone to her bed.

She closed her book and stared at it for another moment, understanding completely what Amy had been talking about. She'd had the same sensations but being who she was no one ever believed her in the town. For that, she preferred to talk about it either to Amy and/or write it in her journal. She glanced at a small pile of papers on her desk and sighed. She would've stuck them in her journal but her journal was filled up now, no more space for anything...and she wasn't going to buy a new one. It was the last thing she had of her mother after all.

Instead, she returned her book to the shelf and headed for her salmon-pink dress that hung on her closet door, a maid of honor didn't get ready in just ten minutes, no!

~ 0 ~

The Reynolds sat at a table not too far from the bride and groom (and their families) in the reception room. They'd just finished hearing the speech from Rory's best man and were about to listen to Amy's father's, Augustus, speech.

"Sorry, everyone. I'll be another two minutes. I'm just reviewing certain aspects," Augustus apologized and sat down to review his speech, the rest of the guests laughing at his actions.

"Your father, Amelia, will be the absolute death of me. Unless, of course, I strike pre-emptively," Tabetha sighed.

Amy laughed at their antics but stopped when she saw a woman with brown hair walking by the windows of the reception giving her a look. It was kind of familiar but Amy wasn't sure why. Still, her body reacted faster than her mind and before Amy knew it, she had stood up.

"Amy? You OK?" Rory looked up at her.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm..." Amy shook her head and sat down again, "...fine."

"Right. Er... You're crying," Rory pointed.

"So I am. Why am I doing that?"

"Because you're happy, probably. Happy Mrs Rory. Happy, happy, happy."

Amy rubbed her face again as she felt more tears, "No. I'm sad. I'm really, really sad."

"Great," Rory sighed, not the way to start a marriage!

"Why am I sad?" Amy wondered then noticed a book in front of Rory, "What's that?"

"Oh, er, someone left it for you. A woman," Rory handed her the book.

"But what is it?" Amy took the book and studied it, putting more thought into it than Rory had apparently.

"It's a book."

"It's blank," Amy showed him a couple pages that were indeed blank.

"It's a present," Rory thought he was stating the obvious here.

"But why?"

"Well, you know the old saying. The old... wedding... thing. Huh?" Rory tried to make sense of it but failed miserably, "Amy?"

Augustus stood up with an apologetic smile, "Ready now. Sorry about that. Last-minute adjustments to certain aspects. Now then, it hardly seems a year..."

Amy didn't pay attention to what was going on as she was beginning to remember things...things she had no idea what they were. She studied a nearby guest wearing a red bowtie and then another guest with blue braces. Amy felt a tear stroll down her face and it fell to the book's cover.

"Shut up, Dad!" Amy abruptly stood up, ending her father's speech.

"Amy?" Rory reached for her hand.

"Amelia?" Augustus frowned.

"Sorry, but shut up, please!" Amy begged them as she took a deep breath, "There's someone missing...someone important. Someone so, so important."

"Amy, what's wrong?" Rory moved to stand but she shook her head and continued to talk.

"No one understands, except Avalon," Amy pointed at her ginger friend, all eyes moving to Avalon in a snap, "I had an imaginary friend when I was kid," and then went the sighs of her parents, "And my friend Avalon, she wrote about him."

"And it was meant to be a secret," Avalon said through gritted teeth, giving Amy a look that said to shut up. She didn't care if Amy was the bride, she would punch her.

"The raggedy Doctor," Amy insisted, "My raggedy Doctor. And Avalon's fairy tale man, but he wasn't imaginary. He was real. You know he was," Amy looked around, more determined than ever, "I remember you! I remember! I brought the others back, I can bring you home, too. Raggedy man, I remember you, and you are late for my wedding!"

In the silence around the room, Rory and the twins noticed their glasses clinking against each other as the ground underneath shook, the chandelier swaying above.

"I found you. I found you in words, like you knew I would," Amy continued, not about to give up, especially when the wind started picking and the faint noises of the TARDIS began to grow audible, "That's why you told me the story...the brand new, ancient blue box. Oh, clever. Very clever."

"Amy, what is it?" Rory, still confused, looked all around.

"Avalon..." Lena whispered, slightly frightened.

"It's the Fairy Tale Man," Avalon began smiling as the TARDIS materialized in the middle of the dance floor. "It's my Fairy Tale Man..."

"Something old. Something new. Something borrowed. Something blue," Amy laughed.

"It's the Doctor!" Rory remembered now as the box was now fully visible, unaware that Amy had climbed over their table and was heading for the TARDIS, "How did we forget the Doctor? I was plastic. I died in an underground cave..." He saw the looks he got for the last bit and added, quietly, "Long story."

Lena blinked when she started to remember as well, "I died," she frowned.

"I met Mary Costa," Avalon recalled. "And Zelda Sayre Fitzgerald."

"You did what?" their father, who sat across them, raised his eyebrows at the knowledge he was hearing.

Both sisters looked back at him with sweet smiles, "Nothing, Daddy," they said together.

"You're both weird," Gavin muttered, earning himself identical glares from his sisters.

Amy was knocking, or pounding, on the TARDIS doors calling for the alien inside, "OK, Doctor. Did I surprise you this time?"

The door opened and out came the Doctor, dressed in a top hat with a white tie and tails, a large, loose white scarf draped over his shoulders, "Er, yeah. Completely astonished. Never expected that. How lucky I happened to be wearing this old thing," he stepped out for everyone to see him, "Hello, everyone. I'm Amy's imaginary friend, but I came anyway," he shook hands with a flabbergasted Augustus Pond, "Oh, and a Fairy Tale Man," he waved at the Reynolds, specifically giving a wink to Avalon.

She smiled in return.

"You absolutely, definitely may kiss the bride," Amy strode for the Doctor, pulling his attention back to the bigger picture.

"Amy!" the twins exclaimed as they stood up from their seats.

The Doctor placed a finger on Amy's lips and grinned, "Amelia! From now on, I shall be leaving the... kissing duties to the brand new Mr Pond," he shook Rory's hand as the man came to join them.

"No, I'm not Mr Pond. That's not how it works," Rory began to argue.

"Yeah, it is," the Doctor nodded.

"Yeah, it is," Rory mumbled with acceptance.

"Big brother!" Lena rushed up to hug the Doctor.

The Doctor, upon remembering her (thankfully rewritten) fate, hugged her back instantaneously. "Baby sister! Thank goodness you're okay now," he kissed her head and hugged her just a bit longer. "And happy, and...gorgeous by the way," Lena chuckled, "Alive and happy, just like you should be."

"I can't believe I forgot about everything," Lena pulled away and looked at Avalon, "I called you crazy for all those stories you wrote."

"Is there anyone who didn't read my stories?" Avalon huffed.

"Me," Rory raised his hand, succeeding in making her laugh.

"Of course," she had to smile at him.

"And me," the Doctor added with a cheeky grin, "Though maybe I could take a small peek...?"

"No," she said, though the Doctor swore he could see a small blush on her cheeks that made him even more curious about those stories, "But I'm glad to have you back," she moved on up and hugged him.

"Right then, everyone," he cleared his throat and pulled away from Avalon to look back at the guests, "I'll move my box. You're going to need the space," he rushed into the TARDIS and looked back, "I only came for the dancing," he smirked and went off.

The remaining group looked at each others with smiles as they felt the wind of the TARDIS dematerializing hit them, simply happy to be together again.

~ 0 ~

Later that night, each companion got to see just how good of a dancer the Doctor was. Amy was first up on the dance floor and as she did her best, normal dancing to Queen's "Crazy Little Thing Called Love", she had no idea what the Doctor was doing.

"You're terrible! That is embarrassing!" she accused, but the Doctor didn't seem to care. He thought he was doing just fine.

After that the Doctor started showing off his 'moves' for the children who were eager to learn how to dance like him, "That's it. That's good. Keep it loose!"

"Teach me!" Lena came over to join them, the Doctor more than happy to show his baby sister just how to dance. It was her turn after all!

~ 0 ~

The music had slowed down and provided the best setting for the new couple. Mostly everyone was at the dance floor, accompanying Amy and Rory for the moment... almost everyone. The Doctor was happily watching his friends dance when Lena slowly came up to him.

"Big brother, can I talk to you for a second?" the seriousness in her face indicated to the Doctor there was something deeply bothering her.

"Of course," he agreed and followed her to a more quiet place.

~ 0 ~

Avalon would've enjoyed the dancing if someone that day had bothered to take her out. Since that failed, she decided to leave the party for a moment just to get some fresh air. The ballroom was a bit stuffy anyways. As she walked out of the ballroom, however, she started to hear weird noises from a distance. It sounded like a gurgle, actually, but not a regular gurgle. She would've ignored it but she also got the feeling that something was watching her.

"Hello?" she called out. She stopped when she heard a crunching of leaves on the ground. "If this is one of you stupid kids trying to scare me, I will get you," she warned and stepped into a small sitting area. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head when she saw not a child, but a gray alien in a black suit. "O-o-oh my God…" she stumbled back a couple steps and hit a tree's bark. "Wh-what are you…?"

The alien tilted is large head to the side, raising one of its tentacle-like hands and pointing a long finger at her. "You tried to hide from the Silence but we have found you," its raspy voice filled the area.

"D-doctor!" she started to call out.

The lone creature directed its other hand to the bench where a rolled up paper sat. Avalon followed the gaze and, unfortunately, forgot the creature altogether.

"Avalon?" she heard the Doctor call her name and she quickly turned around.

"Avalon are you out here?" Lena then called.

Avalon blinked slowly and rubbed the side of her head. She looked around and spotted the rolled up letter again on the bench. She walked over to it and picked it up. Without hesitation, she ripped off the small red ribbon keeping it folded and scanned its contents.

"There you are!" Lena's exclaim startled the ginger but by that time she had already finished reading the letter.

"Was it my imagination or were you calling my name?" the Doctor was making a face as he tried to decide whether or not the call had been real. There was too much going on to be sure.

Avalon looked at them with a sly smile. "Mm, I'm curious to see what dreams you've been having of me, Fairy Tale Man."

The Doctor sputtered with a red face, making her laugh. "That's not funny!"

"Ahem," Lena calmly cleared her throat. "Avalon, there was something we wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh? The both of you?" Avalon raised an eyebrow, a suspicious swirl sitting in her eyes.

Lena nodded her head. "Mhm. It's actually quite simple, really. I'm not going to travel with the Doctor anymore." Avalon blinked pretty face at first, surprised by the sudden decision. "But I want you to continue doing so."

"Um...excuse me?" Avalon turned her attention to the Doctor to see what he had to say on the matter.

"Lena's good at making points, Ava," the Doctor cleared his throat, prepared to receive snaps and shouts for agreeing with the choice Lena made.

"Sorry, the both of you want me to leave my sister behind? Why on Earth would I ever do that!?"

"Because it's high time you stopped taking care of me and start living your life," Lena had the answer within the second. She was adamant this time to get the point across Avalon's head. "I'm sick, yes, but it is a controlled illness and I have doctors to take care of me. You have put your life on hold for me and the rest of our family for far too long. It stops today. We are all grown up, Avalon. It's time to let go."

Avalon was nothing short but stunned to hear Lena say all that. "I don't...I...Lena?"

Lena raised her head, clearly determined. "I'm not going to travel anymore because I don't feel like it's where I belong."

"Even though I've said she's always welcomed," the Doctor added and Lena nodded in acknowledgment.

"This is the choice I had made before I died in that other time line. The TARDIS is amazing but...it's just not my place," Lena reiterated. "But it's yours, Avalon. I know it is. So you go and you travel...and send me a postcard every now and then."

Avalon was hurt, of course she was, and Lena saw it. The ginger saddened up as a consequence and when she spoke, her next words were apologetic. "I didn't mean to annoy you, Lena-"

"Avalon, it's not that-"

"I just don't want to lose you like we lost Mum," Avalon lowered her arms still holding the letter she found. "I love you Lena, and I never want anything to happen to you."

Lena smiled and walked up to her sister to give her the biggest hug possible. "I know that, silly. You have a very big heart and from now on I'm going to make sure that its content. Truly content." She pulled away to meet Avalon's gaze. "I talked to Dad about it and he's on board."

"I guess there's no choice then, huh?" Avalon lightly chuckled. "Is that alright with you, Doctor?"

The man was already smiling. "I have a few places we could try…"

The idea of travelling made Avalon swell with excitement. It was something she'd always wanted to do but because of her family's situation she never got to live out. Now, now it was different, but there was also something else that might be pushing her to accept Lena's command.

"Okay then," she finally agreed out loud. "But now I'd like a word with you, Doctor."

The Doctor's face fell and his entire body stiffened. "Am I in trouble?"

"Well, you blew up the world but then put it back together so no, you're not. But I just need to tell you something."

Lena was all smiling because her plan worked. "I'll leave you then!" she happily returned to the ballroom.

Avalon watched her sister disappear into the building before deciding to speak again. Without a word, she held out the folded letter to the Doctor.

His eyes flickered from her to the paper and in no time was confused. "Am I...am I supposed to take it?" she nodded her head. "It's for me?"

"Uh, no, it's for me...apparently," Avalon watched him finally take it and unroll it.

'Dear Avalon, I know this is strange and probably confusing but it is imperious that you listen to me. You must remain with the Doctor for your own safety. Bad things are coming, and they will be coming for you and all your friends.'

The Doctor's mouth closed and opened several times, much to Avalon's amusement, as he failed to understand where this message got off giving such an obscure warning. "Where did you get this?"

"I just found it on the bench!" Avalon gestured to the dusty, white bench behind her. "It was right there!"

"Did you see anybody, then?"

"Does it look like I saw anybody?"

The Doctor frowned and rolled the letter back up. "Okay, well, we can't jump to any conclusions about this. It could just be someone playing a trick."

"It's got to be," Avalon crossed her arms. "I mean, it doesn't make sense, does it?"

The Doctor could tell that despite her calm exterior, there was an inkling of fear starting inside her. "Just...for the time being, I think it is best if you come along with me."

"But what if it's not?" she asked, her eyes briefly flickering to the ballroom. "What if they come for my family?"

"Listen, by the looks of it, their main point was to get to you...we're just along for the ride," the Doctor did not make her feel better and he knew it. He walked up to her and comfortingly rubbed her arms. "We'll figure if this is just a trick or not. Trust me, okay?"

"Okay," she nodded. It wasn't a very difficult thing to trust in him, after all. She felt safe with him no matter what.

The Doctor smiled at her and startled her by taking her hand. "Would you like to dance?" It didn't appear that she believed him because she looked around like he'd been asking someone else. "I meant you, red," the Doctor laughed. "I've danced with everyone except for you...though Rory didn't seem to like it very much."

Avalon snickered. "I bet he didn't."

"Complete the set, then?"

Avalon's smile faded a little as she sighed. "Um, listen…" she slowly took her hand from his. "I think it's no secret that a lot of Amy's family disapproves of me, um...I'd rather not be the center of their attention."

"But I thought Avalon Reynolds just didn't care?" the Doctor playfully scrutinized her face.

"I don't," she agreed, "But this is Amy and Rory's day. I'm not ruining it just to make a point."

"C'mon, I think they know you enough not to care. Dance?" he took her hand again. "Don't worry, I can teach you how."

That made Avalon laugh a genuine, teasing laugh. It made the Doctor smile as he pulled them towards the ballroom.

Since it was a slow dance, Avalon found herself a bit nervous as she took position for a dance. She'd danced to regular music in clubs with Mels and Amy, (when they'd sneak in with fake ID's), but never actual slow dances. Like she said before, no one ever asked her for fear of the talks from people so she'd never had the chance for a proper dance.

"I don't..." she became even more nervous as she thought more on it.

"I don't hear any talks," the Doctor whispered to her as they started to sway to the music.

"Give them a couple of minutes, they'll come up with something," she kept her gaze down, "They did for you earlier."

"Oh, I bet they did," the Doctor smirked, not at all perturbed with it, "But I was having fun, so I don't care in the least."

Avalon looked up and smiled a bit, teasing actually, "You did look ridiculous, though. I just want that to be clear. I need it to be clear."

"Ridiculously fun, though," he corrected.

She rolled her eyes, "Call it whatever you like, but it was ridiculous. Kids are going to be dancing that stupid dance you taught them for months!"

"I'll be glad to give them more lessons."

"No you will not," she shook her head, chuckling to herself.

"Look at that, you've forgotten your nervousness and the 'talks' of the people," the Doctor 'discreetly' smirked about it.

"Guess I did," she acknowledged, "You're good at distracting, you know. And not that bad of a slow dancer, I'm shocked."

"Well, there's a lot you don't know about me either," he tapped her nose and smiled back.

"Guess I don't..." she acknowledged it without a thought. A couple moments passed in silence until Avalon looked up at him and smiled, "I never said..."

"Said what?" the Doctor blinked, genuinely confused.

"You did impress me. Since the first trip I took with you...you got me," she smiled so genuinely the Doctor had no idea what to do nor say. There was a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach, but a good kind. "I am so impressed by you, Doctor."

"I...thank you..." the Doctor cleared his throat, more awkwardly than he would have liked. Why couldn't he get himself together!?

"And, I'd also like to thank you, for real this time, for giving me the opportunity to travel with my sister."

The Doctor nodded his response and smiled, "A chance to travel with the Ponds and Reynolds? How can I possibly give that up?"

She blushed without realizing it and moved to rest her head on his shoulder, never even thinking about the murmurs of the guests anymore. She felt quite content where she was.

~ 0 ~

Upon seeing the Reynolds regathering for a final talk on what would be happening over the next couple months, the Doctor took opportunity to quietly slip out of the reception room. He wanted get back to the TARDIS to get a little bit of work done with the mysterious enemy that had taken over the entire box when Avalon and River were inside. He figured it would be good to get a head-start before Avalon joined him. He admitted that he was a bit excited to have a companion that would be sticking around for a while. He was certain the Ponds would want some time along as newlyweds anyways.

"Did you dance?" a voice startled him out of his thoughts. He turned around to see River standing a couple feet from him, "Well, you always dance at weddings, don't you?"

"You tell me," he challenged.

"Spoilers," she smirked.

He sighed and pulled out her journal then handed it back to her, "The writing's all back, but I didn't peek."

"Thank you."

The Doctor also took out her vortex manipulator for her, "Are you married, River?" he suddenly wondered.

"Are you asking?" she mused as she put the manipulator on her wrist.

"Yes."

"Yes."

He blinked, "No, hang on. Did you think I was asking you to marry me, o- o-or asking if you were married?"

"Idiot," she murmured and sighed, "Someone's not gonna be very happy if she learns about this."

"Who?"

"Spoilers," she shrugged.

The Doctor sighed, "River...who are you?"

"You're going to find out very soon now," she conceded, swallowing hard, "And I'm sorry, but that's when everything changes."

She reached for her manipulator but the Doctor stopped her with a call. He pulled out the folded letter Avalon had found and waved it in the air. "Did you write this?"

For a second, there was a brief falter in River, but if it had been real it'd been wiped away in the next second. "Me? Messing with the timeline? You told me never to."

"River…" the Doctor was not playing jokes.

"I must be going," River waved and activated her manipulator, disappearing in a flash.

"That woman..." He wouldn't even bother with that right now. He unlocked the TARDIS, stepping inside and dancing his way up to the console.

He didn't get much work started when he heard the doors reopening and looked up to see Amy walking in, "Oi! Where are you off to?" she called, "Finished dancing with Avalon yet?" she smirked.

"Shut up," the Doctor pointed without looking at her.

"Oh c'mon, we haven't even had a snog in the shrubbery yet," she teased just as the doors re-opened.

"Amy!" Rory gave the call.

"Just one last tease," she laughed.

"That'll be the day," Avalon entered behind Rory, with Lena, "The day Amy Pond, er Williams, stops flirting will be the end of the world."

"Oi, says the biggest flirt in the universe," Amy scoffed.

"Am not," Avalon frowned.

"Are too!"

"Anyways," Lena covered Avalon's mouth while Rory did the same to Amy, "Big brother, I asked my Dad if I could take one trip with you and he said it was fine. Can I come?"

"My baby sister is asking if she can come?" the Doctor let out a small laugh, "C'mon, Lena, you can stay forever if you'd like!"

Lena smiled softly, "No, I think I'll be fine with one trip," she nodded.

Lena made it clear now that she was not content with the traveling about and danger. It just wasn't her style. Of course, it didn't mean she wanted to give it up completely. She'd grown to love the Doctor as a true 'big brother' and never wanted to give him up. She was simply going to take trips sporadically.

"So, where exactly are we going?" Avalon pushed Lena's hand from her mouth.

"Was actually planning on getting some work done..." the Doctor began but Rory cut him off.

"You just saved the whole of space and time. Take the evening off. Maybe a bit of tomorrow."

"I'm with Rory," Amy nodded.

"Space and time isn't safe yet. The TARDIS exploded for a reason. Something drew the TARDIS to this particular date, and blew it up," the Doctor reminded and headed over to the ringing phone, "Why? And why now? The Silence, whatever it is, is still out there, and I have to...excuse me a moment," he answered the call, "Hello. Oh! Hello. I'm sorry, this is a very bad line. No, but that's not possible. She was sealed into the Seventh Obelisk. I was at the prayer meeting. Well, no, I get that it's important. An Egyptian goddess loose on the Orient Express…in space! Give us a mo," he looked up at the group, "Sorry, something's come up. This will have to be goodbye. Ava, you ready to go?"

"Let's see, I've got my twin, my best friend and my flirty friend," Avalon nodded, "Definitely ready."

"Off we go!" Lena cheered and pulled Avalon up to the console, "With newlyweds, that'll be interesting."

"And fun," Rory added, making them all laugh.

The Doctor looked at them all and beamed, picking up the phone again and speaking into it, "Don't worry about a thing, Your Majesty. We're on our way," and the TARDIS was off for the newest of adventures.

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

A/N: I am SO happy to write in Lena again, she really is the sweet OC of my batch!! Aaaaand so starts the letter business...yikes. :)

[chaoswriting92]

Games We Shouldn’t Play

Chapter 3: I’m not okay I promise

You were waiting to hear the painfully familiar buzz when the worst possible thing could have happened. 

“Y/n? What are you doing here? I haven’t seen you since… well anyway I am so sorry you had to find out like that. I told Jin he should have come clean about it and I really hate that…” The buzz cut her off and you rushed inside heading for the elevator only belatedly remembering she had to ride up with you.

“So… what are you doing here?” She asked as we waited for the elevator to go up to the correct floor.

“Meeting Jaebeom.”

“Oh right the runway show is coming up so you must be needing to go over the tracks with him and the client, right?”

“Nope.”

“Then for the new ad campaign? Jin told me that you had a new shoot coming that Jimin had lined up for V. Did you need a female model for that one? My schedule’s empty this week.” She said positive that it had to be business because apparently, in her mind, if Jaebeom hadn’t liked her, there was no possible way he’d want you.

“No. I don’t need a female for that one. It is a men’s shoot for Dazed and JB and I have already finalized the tracks for the Runway show and for that shoot, but thanks for asking.” You managed to keep your voice professional  not wanting to tell her what you were really doing there and grateful that Jin’s apartment was two floors up from JB even if there was a possibility she was going to tell him she had seen you. The elevator doors finally opened and you could swear you heard the hallelujah chorus.

“It was good seeing you Hyeji.” 

“You too y/n. Tell Jaebeom I said hi, okay?”

The doors shut behind you and you scrunched your nose in distaste mimicking her voice. 

“Tell Jaebeom I said hi, O- dear Jesus! Jimin, Hi.” You jumped and slammed your elbow into the wall, hissing in pain and biting down on your lip to keep from cursing, when you realized you weren’t alone in the hallway. 

“Hi, Y/n. You okay?” He nodded in the direction of your elbow which you were rubbing at to sooth the bruising ache away.

“Yeah, fine. How have you been? I haven’t exactly been on the marketing floor since Jin and I… anyway thanks for setting up that photoshoot for Taehyung.”

“No problem. So what are you doing on this floor?” Oh great not him too. You thought.

“I came to visit JB.” 

“Oh. Does Jin know?”

“I’m sure Hyeji will tell him. I rode up with her.”

“You know he didn’t mean to hurt you, right? I mean I know what it looks like and I’m not saying any of this is right, but Jin, he’s not… he’s not a bad guy.”

“Jimin I know that, but that kind of makes it worse. I’m late so I’ll catch you later.” You went down the hall giving a small smile to Yoongi where he was bringing his laundry back into his room and knocked on JB’s door.

“I was beginning to think you got lost,” he joked smiling until he saw the deflated look on your face.

“What happened?” He asked looking around trying to figure out what could’ve made you so sad in the twenty minutes it had taken to get from your apartment to his.

“I ran into Hyeji on the elevator and then Jimin in the hall.”

“Should we have met at your place?”

“No, I am going to have to get used to this. If we are going to be really committing to this thing then I need to be seen with you. By everyone. Half of this is supposed to be proving I’ve moved on too, right?” 

  “Did Jasmine decide she was going to grill you about last night after all?" JB asked you when you pulled out your phone. 

     "Uh... No. It's just work emails. It can wait until Monday. Where did you want to go for breakfast? I know of a great Bingsu place a few stops down from my apartment." He seemed to think about it for a minute. You started to just say forget it and suggest that you two just go to a bakery or a cafe for a normal breakfast when he finally spoke. 

     "Dessert for breakfast, I like it. Let's go."

     It was surprisingly easy being on Jaebeom's arm. He had an easy way about himself that put you at ease too. It helped that he was the type of person who knew how to laugh at himself even in the face of being such a handsome guy. He was the opposite of Seokjin in so many different ways. Seokjin had sometimes seemed too aware of the fact he was beautiful and had needed verbal reassurance of the fact often so his insecurity was kept bay; Jaebeom, despite being reminded through compliments, and Jackson fawning over him in the way only a stylist could, seemed to be oblivious to it or just not care. Hell, he'd recently pierced under his eye only to take it out a few months later because he was bored with the look of it and this morning had been filled with talk of him redying his hair blue now that it had grown out. 

     "Really though if I don't dye the roots do you think it will still look good? Here, have a bite of this." He held a spoonful of Bingsu out so you could try it. 

     "Mmm, oh my god," you mumbled around the mouthful of fruit and shaved ice. The different flavors were a perfect match to one another and completely different to the matcha and chocolate you had chosen.

     "Here, bite." You gave him a spoonful of yours before speaking again. 

     "If you want my honest opinion I think as long as you wear it with confidence anything looks good on you. Even that God awful blonde with the orange bang clip you wore in college. You looked like a banana but a very cute banana. I also think the fact you're dying your own hair is going to drive Jackson and Sooran nuts so I say go for it." 

     He seemed to think about it for a while and after finishing off a strawberry at the bottom of the Bingsu he finally came to a decision. 

"Will you help me after this then?"

"Yeah sure."

      Sunday unlike the day before had been spent alone staring at your phone as it rang and wondering if you should just bite the bullet and answer Jin. Maybe you'd cry. Maybe you'd yell at him and demand for the answers to why or what you weren't sure. Maybe you'd be cruel and make up fallacies about how JB was ten times better in every way so that he could feel the hurt and inadequacy you'd felt this entire time. In the end you'd done none of those things. You chose to cry on your own and stare listlessly at the phone hoping to some God it would just die so you didn't have to hear it anymore. 

     You'd foolishly been drinking in the feeling of being around JB and thought maybe you were getting past the whole Seokjin thing, but when faced with your own thoughts and the reality that two days couldn't mend three years going to waste you just felt stupid... and sad. Why didn't he just give up? Clearly he was still seeing Hyeji. He couldn't honestly think continuously calling was going to do anything. Could he? You were contemplating this when a loud and very insistent knocking rattled your door. 

     "Y/n. Open up please," Jin's voice called despairingly on the other side of the door you didn't answer, but you waited by the door holding your breath and wondering what he'd do.  You watched out of the little peep hole where he paced then raised his arm up like he'd knock again in the end deciding against it and walking away. You slumped down to the floor feeling a familiar friend bump up against the side of your arm. Gureum.

 "I know buddy. He left us both, but we still have each other and we don't need that stinky man. Isn't that right Gureumie." You started cooing at him and he purred loudly nuzzling into the ear scritches and batting at your hand every time you tried to stop petting him. 

     Monday came and your head was pounding when the alarm went off. You groaned rolling out of the bed and shuffling your feet a little to get them to fit into the slippers they’d landed on top of when you stood up. You walked over to the closet and rubbed at your eyes looking through the different colors and styles of clothes wondering which you should wear. Something comfortable and neutral that didn’t really take much thought, or something eye catching that would show everyone that  you were fine. 

     You thought you were past the facades and the lying and that you really were almost fine before yesterday. Something about just having Seokjin at your door and acting like he still loved you was different from all the phone calls and texts in the world. Probably the fact you couldn’t delete a person. Couldn’t ignore a voice that was attached to a person and not a machine. Couldn’t escape the words shouted at you through your apartment door. It was like having the place that was supposed to be a haven away from the outside world turn into a cage that trapped you in all of your insecurities and Jin was the one who locked you in.  Your phone let out a small chime and you hesitated before turning around to grab it letting out a sigh of relief when you saw whose name was lighting up on your lockscreen.

You threw your phone back on the bed and went back to your closet flipping through hangars until your hands landed on a two piece black dress and a wrap asymmetrical blazer combination with ruched 3 / 4 length sleeves and gold button details on the left shoulder and slanting diagonally across the abdomen to seal it closed.  It was one of your newest creations and one you hadn’t shown anyone yet. You slipped the dress on and buttoned the blazer in place pairing it with a pair of black ankle boots with gold buckle accents to match.

True to his word Jaebeom was knocking on your door right at seven and you were fixing your hair and makeup into place. You went to open the door a few moments later and noticed Jasmine loitering around outside talking with him. His back was turned full focus on whatever conversation they’d been having. You hoped it was about work and not about yesterday. You honestly didn’t know if Jasmine even knew about what happened yesterday hopefully she’d been out. 

“-Yeah, no JB I didn’t even know he ca- Wow.” Jasmine stopped mid sentence and JB immediately turned around. For a moment your breath caught in your throat. Jaebeom’s eyes had started from the top of your head roaming all down your body to the sensible boots at the bottom and back up until they met your eyes the two of you stayed like that for a minute. JB looked like he wanted to say something but he also seemed just as speechless as you were.

“New dress?” Jasmine saved you both from the awkward silence. You’d honestly forgotten for a moment she was standing there but you turned to her and smiled, trance broken. 

“Yeah I finished it last month. Been sitting in my closet ever since. I was going to give it to Hye- one of the models, but I think I’m going to keep it.” You gave a slow turn and she whistled and nodded in approval.

“Looks better on you anyway. Right JB?” Jasmine said. 

“What? Oh. Yeah. She looks… I mean you look stunning, Y/n” He said and smiled.

“Aren’t you glad you went on that date Friday now?” Jasmine taunted both of you and you rolled your eyes.

“Shut up. Let’s just get out of here before we’re late for work,” you chastised.

The ride to work was quiet. Music playing over the radio and you lost in your own thoughts about everything, yesterday, this morning, what was going to happen at work when you got there. You may not have shown this exact dress to anyone but Hyeji had seen the design sketches before you’d started on it and mentioned that she’d love to wear it when it was made. Maybe that was why you’d chosen it. You knew she’d wanted the dress and after hearing what JB had to say about everything she’d done you’d decided that being petty in some small way was more than deserved. Maybe, though, you’d worn the dress for the look on Jaebeom’s face when he’d turned around this morning. He’d looked at you like you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid eyes on. Then he looked at you like he’d give anything for Jasmine to get lost and the two of you to be late for work… extremely late. 

“You ready for this?” JB asked as he pulled the car into his space in the parking deck drawing you out of your thoughts which had strayed to the idea of what the two of you would be doing if you had decided to just let Jasmine go and be late.

“I think so. Are you?” 

Now that it was here you were second guessing if what you and JB had decided on wasn’t completely crazy and if you should just call it off but he scooped your hand in his and kissed the back of it smoothing off the chapstick imprint with his thumb. 

“Come on,” He said letting go of your hand only to come around and open your door. You had to go outside and around to the front of the building to get in and when you got past the revolving door he settled in beside you with an arm over your shoulder like it was perfectly natural to be there. 

“Hey Y/n, JB how was your weekend?” Bambam had walked up and was already carrying a tablet which meant he was about to get to business talk after the pleasantries.

“It was ok. What you got? Ad campaign or something that needs an audio overlay?” you asked, holding your hand out for the tablet.

“Audio.” 

“And that would be you.” You passed the tablet to JB.

“You trying to get rid of me already?” He took it and hit play on the video that Bambam and his team had made and you could already see the gears turning and hear him humming a little of a few different songs. It was incredibly endearing and you could feel yourself smiling as the three of you walked towards the elevator that would take you to your respective floors.

“Y/n!” You looked up from where you were waiting for the doors to open and saw Jin walking in with Jimin, Taehyung and Namjoon.

“I’m just gonna take the stairs.” You started to walk off but JB caught your hand.

“It’s okay. We talked about this, trust me,” He whispered into your ear. He was right. The two of you had talked about it. How it was going to be hard to face Jin and the others today as your hands had washed through his hair and soaked the dye into it. Your fingers were still a little blue around the cuticles but his hair looked great. You thought back to how much fun Friday and Saturday had been and took a deep breath. He promised to stick this out with you. The least you could do now was what you promised. You nodded. 

“Y/n can I talk to you.” 

“Why don’t you go talk to Hyeji instead.” Bambam muttered.

“I’m sorry, is there a problem here?” Jin snapped.

“Yes Seokjin there is.” about that time the elevator dinged and opened up.

“Bambam,” You shook your head and he gave you a look like, ``Are you serious?” and you nodded. Your hand was still being held by JB’s and you had noticed him squeeze it once or twice in solidarity but he hadn’t said anything. He looked like he wanted to though. He looked like he wanted to push Jin out of the elevator to when he’d climbed on. Namjoon was off first as he worked on the accounting floor. Taehyung was off next shooting conflicted looks to both you and Seokjin but he shook his head and let out a sigh before stepping out. Jimin would be riding all the way up with you and  Jin unless Jin kicked him off with JB and BamBam who were going to the media floor. You half thought of getting off with the two of them yourself and making some excuse like the video they were working on was for one of your photo shoots, but you couldn’t do that either. 

When it hit JB and Bambam’s floor Bambam shoved his way out of the back annoyed and looked to JB. 

“I’ll see you in the studio, okay? Deadline is at eleven.”

“I already figured out the track we just need to overlay it so it will be done way before that. I’ll see you at lunch, beautiful.” He turned to face you hooking the elevator door with his foot so it wouldn’t close and kissed you on the cheek. You nodded and reluctantly let go of his hand. As the door shut you could hear Bambam speaking to JB.

“Why didn’t you-” the doors cut the sound off and it stayed quiet for a moment. Jin was the first to break the silence.

“Hyeji told me she saw you at the apartments the other day.” 

“Hyeji should learn to keep out of things.” You replied.

“That’s not fair. The two of you were friends.”

“Were friends Jin. Then she reminded me why you don’t befriend just anyone in this industry.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I think I’ll let you ask her.” The elevator door dinged open on your floor and you stepped off. Jin followed grabbing you by the arm.

“Seokjin let me go.”

“No. You have been avoiding me for weeks. We need to talk.”

“I don’t want to talk, Jin. Not yet. Can you please just go now?” You tried to wrench your arm loose, but he still had a grip on it.

“Let her go and go back to your floor right now or I swear I will file workplace harassment.” Jasmine came over followed quickly by Mark, Jungkook and a few of the other staff. Jungkook put a hand on Seokjin’s arm and Jin seemed to visibly blink out of the anger and frustration he had before looking at his hand like it belonged to someone else then up to your eyes.

“Shit, Y/N I’m sorry.” He let go and went to the elevator hitting the button so he could leave.  

“Are you okay?” Jasmine wrapped an arm around your shoulders and tears leaked out of your eyes. Your breathing hitched and you shook your head.

“No. No Jazzie I’m not.” 

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

Jin Scenario: You think he’s cheating on you

(but he’s not because Jin is a sweet heart and would never do that you)

Jin had been unusually quiet and distant from you for the past few days. In the 3 years you two had been together, he had never acted this way around you before. He was always so happy to see you, always cracking jokes to make you laugh. You could tell something was bothering him but every time you asked him he would plaster a fake smile on his face and assure you everything was fine. You always told him you knew he was lying, but would reassure him that whenever he was ready to talk to you, you would be there for him. He would just ruffle your hair and kiss your forehead, pretending like he had no idea what you were talking about.

After the third day of him acting this way you were getting concerned. You texted Namjoon to ask if he was okay, only to have him tell you the same thing. He’s fine, probably just tired from practice. However it was later that day when you got you answer. You opened up your twitter app to see Jin’s name trending worldwide. You opened it up and the top tweet was a photo a paparazzi had taken of him with some other woman. Your heart dropped into your stomach. Why was he meeting this random girl? Why was he hugging her? You scrolled down to the next tweet and this time you swear his lips were pressed against her own. You were so incredibly hurt. 3 years of your life, wasted on this man that didn’t even love you or respect you enough not to cheat on you. And in public no less? You were furious. Part of you wanted to march down to the studio and confront him and scream at him until your lungs gave out. But a bigger part of you was just so sad and broken. You knew in your heart you needed to leave. If Jin didn’t want you, then there was no reason for you to stay. You grabbed your suitcase and started packing your bags, sobbing uncontrollably the entire time. Every item you packed away was a piece of your heart breaking off. You grabbed a pen and paper and wrote a note to Jin, placing it on his pillow before you left. You looked at the bedside table and saw a photo of the two of you staring at each other with such love in both of your eyes, or so you thought. You scoffed and laid the photo face down. You grabbed your suitcase and walked out the door. You blocked his number, all the members’ numbers and deactivated your social media. You left no chance for Jin to ever find you. And you hoped it hurt him just as badly as he hurt you as you slammed the door, prepared to walk out of his life for good.

It wasn’t until later that evening when practice was over that Namjoon had warned Jin about the photo going around. Jin was panicked, seeing that he had no calls or messages from you like he normally did.

“She must have seen them Namjoon. Oh my god y/n probably thinks I cheated on her holy shit I need to go home now and fix this.” 

“Wait a minute Jin, what were you even doing out with this other woman anyway? You know how the paparazzi eats this kind of stuff up.”

“She’s just my friend Namjoon.. I was asking her for advice.”

“You go to some girl you barely know for advice and not your members? Not y/n?”

“Namjoon please I need to go-”

“Not until you tell me what the hell is going on Jin! You know y/n texted me earlier today? She said you’ve been acting really weird around her and she was so worried about you. Do you know how bad this looks now? You’ve been isolating yourself from her and now these photos surface? I would be surprised if she didn’t already pack her shit and leave.” Jin can feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes now. He reaches for his phone and dials your phone number only to have it go straight to voicemail. He grabs Namjoon’s phone out of his hands and dials your number only to have the same result.

“Oh god no... please this can’t be happening I can’t lose her not now.” Jin collapses on the ground and Namjoon places a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“Let me ride with you back to the apartment. We’ll figure this out after we get there, okay?” Jin nods and allows Namjoon to help him off the ground and lead him out to the car. Neither of them say anything the whole ride back. Jin enters the apartment and nervously calls out your name. When he receives no answer he calls it louder, hearing nothing but dead silence in return. He runs into every room of the house frantically calling your name until he gets to the bedroom. He notices your half of the closet is almost bare. 

“Jin..” He turns around and sees Namjoon holding a piece of paper in his hand. Jin’s hands are shaking as he opens the letter and sees the note from you.

Sorry I wasn’t good enough for you.

It’s then that Jin finally breaks down, sobbing loudly into his hands as he sits down on the edge of the bed. Namjoon sits next to him and tries his best to comfort him but he’s inconsolable.

“I met with my friend because she owns a jewelry store. She was helping me pick out an engagement ring for y/n and today when that photo was taken she had given it to me. I hugged her to thank her for designing the perfect ring for the most perfect woman. I had been acting weird towards y/n because I was so nervous. I just kept thinking about how I was going to ask her to marry me and I would freeze up.” Jin pulls the box out of his pocket and sets it down on the nightstand before he curls into a ball and hugs your pillow tightly to his chest. It still smells like you and he can pretend, at least for a while that it’s you. That you’re still here. That you didn’t leave him. 

“I’ll sleep outside on the couch tonight Jin, if you need me just let me know. I’m here for you, okay?” Jin doesn’t say anything. He just stares at the wall, trying to think of a way to fix this.

You went back home to stay with your parents for a while, until you could get back on your feet and find a new place to stay. Not a day went by that you didn’t feel the sting of his betrayal. The internet was flooded with different reactions. Some fans threatening to stop supporting BTS if they didn’t kick Jin out of the group. Stating that he didn’t show the values of BTS and Army at all with his cheating scandal. Other fans were saying hurtful things towards you, like they knew he was bound to cheat because who could be happy with someone like you? Then there were the others fiercely defending him. Stating that there was no way he would ever cheat on you, that he loved you way too much and it must have just been the angle of the photo. You had considered that yes, but given his recent behavior towards you, you just couldn’t believe that was the case. 

In the next few days Jin was a wreck. He refused to leave the apartment, refused to eat. He only drank water when the members came over and threatened him if he didn’t. The members never left Jin alone for a moment. He was thankful for that, for them. He hoped wherever you went that you had someone supporting you and making sure you were okay too. They all quickly realized that you had blocked all of their numbers and deactivated your social media. They had no way of contact you. Jin suspected he knew you went back to your parents home, but he literally felt like he had been drained of all of his emotions and energy after you left. Not to mention your parents had recently moved and he had no idea where you were staying. Jin had no idea how to reach you, he was lost. He felt like half of his heart went missing when you left. You always kept him grounded, you always made sure he felt loved and appreciated. Whenever he had self doubts, you were the one comforting him and reassuring him that he was perfect the way he is. And now that you were gone he had no idea what to do with himself. It was 2 weeks after you had left. Jin was eating now, going back to practice. But he hardly ever smiled, he never laughed. The company had addressed the photos and said that they were taken from a wrong angle, but many of the fans were demanding a statement from Jin himself. It was Namjoon’s idea to do a Vlive to address their concerns and assure them what happened. Namjoon stood off to the side of the room out of frame while Jin opened up the app and started his stream.

You get a notification on your phone, seeing a notification that Jin was doing a Vlive. You had forgot to delete that app on your phone. Your finger was hovering over the X, ready to delete it but you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Your heart won over your head and you opened up the app. The sight in front of your face broke your heart all over again. Jin looked like he hadn’t slept at all. His face looked so much thinner, his usual light in his eyes completely gone. His voice didn’t have that happy carefree tone to it anymore. There was almost no emotion in his voice at all. When he speaks his voice sounded so weak and hoarse.

“Hey, everyone. I know many of you are wondering what happened a few weeks ago. Some of you have been asking how I am doing. I’m not going to lie to you, it’s been hell. Y/n...” Jin closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, as if just saying your name is the hardest thing for him to do.

“She is the love of my life. I know how things seemed but, it’s not what you all were thinking. I didn’t cheat on y/n. I would never. She is the moon and the stars on my darkest nights. She’s the sun that lights up my life. In short, I love her more than any damn thing in this world. That stupid photo.. was taken from a weird angle. I was not kissing that woman. She is a dear friend of mine and she...” Jin looks off to the side and you see him grab something and bring it into frame. It’s a small velvet box and the constant ache in your chest intensified.

“She’s also a jeweler. She was helping me design my engagement ring for y/n. That day I hugged her was to thank her for creating the most beautiful ring I had ever seen.. You want me to show you the ring? I’m sorry you guys I just.. I can’t it’s hard enough for me to talk about this as it is.” You can’t stop the tears from streaming down your face. You felt like such an asshole. You should have just talked to him and listened to his side of the story. Instead you let your feelings get the better of you and you impulsively left the only man you had ever loved. You reach for your phone and immediately unblock his number and call him. When Jin hears his phone ringing with the ringtone he chose for you his eyes grow wide. His stream is quickly forgotten as he answers the phone without hesitation.

“Y/n?! Oh my god baby are you okay? Where did you go? Are you safe?” Namjoon walks into frame and turns off the stream to give you two privacy. 

“I’m okay Jin. I... I saw your Vlive.. Can I... do you think I could come home?” Jin lets out a sigh of relief and tries to collect himself.

“Please.. Please do that please come home. I can’t do this anymore I need you baby..” 

“Hey shh it’s okay Jin. I’m going to pack up my things and I’m coming home now, okay?” Your parents lived about 45 minutes away from your apartment. You swear those were the longest minutes of your life. You stood outside the door for a minute, debating if you should knock or just go in. However Jin decided that for you when the threw the door open and tugged you into his arms. You felt his tears soaking your shirt as you buried your face in his chest, crying just as loudly as him.

“Jin I’m sorry I should have just talked to you. I never should have just left you like that.”

“Don’t you apologize y/n. This is my fault. If I wouldn’t have acted so strangely towards you and met my friend in such a public place this never would have happened.” You pull away and before you can speak Jin collides his lips with yours. He kisses you like he’s desperate to feel your touch, to feel you pressed up against him. He lifts you up by your thighs and carries you into the bedroom, laying you down on the bed as he hovers over you and continues pressing kisses along your neck. You lose yourself in his touch, in the feeling of his lips on yours. He pulls away from you and you’re both panting heavily. Jin smiles at you sweetly and kisses you softly on your forehead. He rolls off of you and pulls your back to his chest, tightly wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Hugging you is so much better than hugging your pillow.” You giggle and turn around to face him, pressing more kisses to his face. Jin pulls away and smiles at you warmly.

“Wait here a sec baby.” He climbs off the bed and walks over to his desk and grabs something off of it before kneeling on the floor in front of you. He places the box on the mattress and grabs your hands to sit you up on the edge of the bed. “I think this goes without saying but, I love you y/n. So ridiculously much and I don’t think I can live my life without you in it. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. If you still want me,” He opens the box and you gasp, bringing your hands up to your face as fresh tears are falling down your face as you are met with the sight of the most beautiful ring you have ever seen. “I would love it if you would agree to be my wife. You’re my other half, the better half I think. I want to spend my forever with you and no one else.” You can’t speak as you’re overwhelmed with emotions. You nod your head and Jin slips the ring on your finger. 

“I love you Kim Seokjin.”

“I love you too Mrs. Kim.”

[annacwrites]

the wip list

Alright, gang. Buckle up. This is going to be a long one, and at this point I can’t even bring myself to be sorry about it. I meant to put this off but then I started thinking about it, so here we are (at 1:05 in the morning when I have to work at 8:30, what am I doing?). 

I’m going to break this down in a couple of ways—fanfiction vs. original fiction, fandom (if it’s a fanfic), series/universe (if it’s in one), and then the individual books themselves (if I have the ability to do that, because quite frankly, for some of these I don’t because I have no idea what the titles are or where I’m splitting the story yet).

Also, “WIP” is an incredibly broad term here. In some cases it means I’ve already written the whole thing but I plan to 100% rewrite it (and haven’t started yet). In some cases it means I’ve written half of the thing but haven’t finished yet. In some cases it means I have it all outlined but haven’t started writing yet. In some cases it means I haven’t really touched an outline on paper yet but I have it all worked out in my head. Take the “in progress” part of WIP with a grain of salt.

(Putting this whole thing under the cut because it is so freaking long. I apologize if the read-more doesn’t work on your dash. Idk what tumblr is doing.)  

Starting off easy—the fics:

Harry Potter: (JKR can fuck off with her transphobia and cultural appropriation and all the other stupid and fucked-up shit that she’s done/promoted but, as I said to my friends, she can pry my next-gen fanfics from my cold dead hands. Cursed Child is not canon in my life because I’ve never read it and I don’t care what nonsense she came up with.)

The “In Your Arms I’ll Stay” universe (Tedtoire/Scorose): 

The first fic in this universe is the first fic I ever finished. 110k words followed up by a ~137k word sequel. It is a disaster and a half but it’s also my baby and I fully intend to rewrite it one of these days. It is full of standard Tedtoire trope-y nonsense—best friends since childhood! two-year age gap! jealousy about other relationships! obliviousness!—and at 15 I thought it was a really good idea to try to turn it into a mystery too, which is a mistake that I have every intention of rectifying because it was unnecessary and I just didn’t know how to do drama and tension back then. 

Anyway. It will probably be two parts again when I rewrite it because one part per school year just works, yeah? We’re covering Vic’s fifth/Teddy’s seventh year and Vic’s sixth year/Teddy’s first year out of school over the course of these parts.

Within this universe we also have Heartbeat and Bone, which is a Scorose fic that I’ve written probably 75% of already but have no intention of actually finishing before I rewrite it. I want to get the stories in the right order so that I can get details straightened out, so Teddy and Victoire get the rewrites first and then I’ll be revisiting this fic. Also full of trope-y nonsense (and my continued acceptance of the headcanon that the Heads have their own dormitory at Hogwarts, because it’s just too much fun that way).  

some things were meant to be (Tedtoire):

Oh god, another fic with a cliché title taken from Can’t Help Falling In Love. I have zero regrets because it fits them perfectly.

This one is... half-done? I fully intend to finish it but I need to finish the outline first. It was my 2019 NaNoWriMo project and I am 100% just writing it for the lols (and because Teddy and Vic are like... my comfort ship where writing is concerned). I wanted to play with a different universe and change up their relationship and roles at school a bit, but once again... trope-y nonsense. It’s unavoidable with them. There is obliviousness everywhere. 

Star Wars: (it’s Reylo, okay? It’s Reylo. I don’t want to hear it about how the ship is ~so terrible.~ That is literally the furthest thing in the world from a hot take, you can’t say a single thing that I haven’t heard before, and I’m a grown adult and can do what I want. Bite me.)

looking for the map that leads me home (Reylo): 

Stole the title on this one from We Take Care of Our Own by Bruce Springsteen, because why the fuck not, right? 

To put it simply: musician AU. To put it a little less simply: he’s got a dead career, she wants to have even the slightest shot at one, Rose is the best, Poe’s a singing heartthrob, Finn is a love-struck goofball. You know, all that fun stuff. The entire thing is based on a playlist that I made and every chapter has a song that acts as its theme. I haven’t touched it since January 2018. I want to finish it eventually but it’s not really at the top of the priority list. 

There’s a few other fics from other fandoms that I’ve started and never finished but the odds of me touching them again are like... nonexistent, so I’m not including them here. I’ll update this post if anything changes on that front (but it probably won’t).

Now for the complicated part—the original fiction:

Maker’s Magic 

This is a trilogy (or at least, it’s supposed to be). This is also a rewrite of the first story I ever finished—the fantasy novel that I wrote for my first-ever Camp NaNoWriMo back in August of 2011, when I had literally no clue what I was doing at all and essentially stole the plot structure from The Obsidian Trilogy by Mercedes Lackey and built my own story around it. This is not a good way to write a piece of fiction that you want to publish, kids, but it is a damn good way to get your feet wet when you’ve never really written before.

I am reworking this story entirely from scratch. The characters are... kind of the same as the original story. Kind of. Maybe. I’ve changed a few names and merged a few people together and scrapped some others and entirely shifted the backstory of pretty much everyone, but... they’re definitely still the same, right? 

Basically, at this point the plot is really only similar to The Obsidian Trilogy in that we’ve got a trilogy, we’ve got some elves, and it’s your standard good vs. evil fantasy story (in its own unique fashion, of course). I’m still working out the details of this rewrite, but this is kind of the Holy Grail of all of my writing projects and the one that I’m most concerned about getting right, so I’m anticipating that I’ll be in it for the long haul on this one. I’m hoping I might be able to get a draft of the first book done this year, but... we’ll see.

(I also don’t want to give too many details about this project, ‘cause it’s the one that I’d really like to maybe publish one day, so...)

The Willow Hill universe

This started as a single story plus a standalone sequel set in the same universe, conceptualized when I was fourteen and missing horseback riding terribly (so yes, it is a story for all those Weird Horse Girls™ out there). I wrote a good portion of it, then deleted it, then rewrote the entire thing, then deleted it again a few years ago because I was no longer satisfied with the writing quality (after hitting top 100 on the Teen Fiction list on Wattpad way back when, so... I didn’t do too badly as a 16-year-old, but the writing still sucked). I’ve been promising a rewrite to my Wattpad followers since 2016 or something like that (2014? Whenever the hell it was that I deleted it the second time) but haven’t delivered at all.

I now envision this universe as a duology plus the aforementioned standalone sequel, except it’s not entirely fair to call it a YA duology in that the first book is definitely YA, but the second is more romance-y?

I originally just revealed the main character’s endgame relationship in the epilogue of the story, but I love both her and her boyfriend and their relationship so much that I decided that I’m going to be self-indulgent and write the story of them actually falling in love with each other, so that’s book two (so really, you don’t actually have to read book two to understand anything, I’m just writing it because I want to and it’s also kind of a present to anyone who read the original story when they were also a teenager and is now an adult who wants to read other stuff). 

Book one is now about the teenage struggle of crushes and trying to figure out what it is that you actually want out of your life and what you value (I say “now” because it was definitely way more self-insert-y the first time I wrote it and it is decidedly not at this point). It’s also sort of a love letter to trainers who are amazing and the kind of person we should all be so lucky as to be coached by.

These characters are my comfort characters where original fiction is concerned since they’ve been bouncing around in my head for the last ten years or so, and I’m hoping I can get at least the first book rewritten in the next year-ish, partly because I’ve been promising it for so long, and partly because I just really enjoy this world and I want to get back to it again.

The Coffee Shop Chronicles

AKA, I lived in one coffee shop on my university campus for pretty much the entirety of my college experience and it was a very inspiring place to be, so this has less to do with coffee shop AUs and more to do with the fact that I met several of my favorite human beings on this earth over a vanilla chai latte and mutual sass with the baristas.

(One of said baristas is very near and dear to me and introduced me to another regular who is now a very good friend with the statement “You’re both sarcastic assholes. You’ll love each other.”) 

None of the characters in this universe are based on actual human beings whom I know, but I liked the idea of the campus coffee shop serving as this thing that tangentially connected all of these people to one another, much in the way that I am tangentially connected to god knows how many people via my barista friend. Essentially, the idea is that the stories in this universe are all standalone, but the characters sometimes cross paths with one another at Caffeinated, so it’s sort of... Easter-egg-y in terms of who pops up where in which story. 

Currently I only have two stories in this universe that are legitimately plotted out, but there is room for any number of spin-offs based on whichever characters show up in those stories (or don’t—that’s the fun of it being a coffee shop. The barista is the only reliable character). Those two stories are as follows:

Chance Encounters (title so totally subject to change, also stealing the terribly summary from the Wattpad draft that never saw the light of day):

For Bennett McGuire, things with guys just didn't seem to want to go her way. From the disasters that were her attempts at dating in high school to the problem that had been Elijah Becker, she hadn't exactly had the best luck. With all that in mind, it made perfect sense to swear off dating until she finished college—that is, it made sense until one frozen day in February when Gordon Evans walked into her life. After that, who was to say what would happen?

What’s Your Metaphor? (once again, enjoy the terrible summary from the Wattpad draft that never was. I am cringing reading it but also too tired to come up with anything better):

"What's the point?" 

It's a question asked widely, for all sorts of reasons, and it's one that April Hayes didn't know the answer to any better than anyone else. All she knew was that she had her plan, and she was going to stick to it, because it was the only thing that seemed to have any sort of logic to it in her life. The things she thought, the things she believed—well, they all fell before the plan, because she didn't have time to ask herself "What's the point?"

That is, she didn't have the time to know the answer—her answer—until one guy by the name of Drew Collier showed up and made her consider things that she had never even thought of before.

High Blood

Yinz can go read my WIP introduction post for this one. It’s a fantasy story. Just for the hell of it, here’s the summary from said WIP introduction post: 

At the age of seventeen, Thessaly of Averak had a choice—take the crown of her people and her place as her father’s heir, or set it aside to become one of the High Warriors, dedicated to protecting their people and the country that her long-dead ancestor Enred built after leading its citizens out of a long and bloody war. Amidst raids and famine at the borders, she gave up her crown to better serve the people that her family rules.

Ten years later, all is quiet. At least, all is quiet until Beca’s pendant is stolen by a thief who disappears into the night on the journey back from the summer palace, Tess gets herself stabbed, and the discovery is made that the rock-solid foundations of their family’s claim to the throne—and the peace that depends upon them—are laced with hairline fractures.

(I didn’t write anything to speak of for Camp NaNo July 2020 and actually wound up deleting my project for this on the NaNo site because my dad was hit by a car while cycling the Friday before the weekend when I was planning to write like... 30k words to catch up, so obviously I gave up on that plan (he is doing well now, thank you for asking). I’m hoping I’ll get around to this one eventually because this particular universe arguably has the most potential for having multiple stories set in it, fantasy-wise.)

Emerson’s Lights

Natalie Flynn has been best friends with Evan Acheson practically since birth. They've stuck together through thick and thin, from her braces in seventh grade to his jump to stardom as a singer-songwriter their freshman year of college. 

She’d do anything for him, but spending a week with him on tour involves a lot more than she bargained for, culminating in the turn of events that is Caleb Blake, lead singer and primary songwriter of opening act Emerson’s Lights, moving into her house for the better part of a month.

She always knew there would be complications being the best friend of a rock star, but this? This was one that she didn’t bet on.

(Aka, girl meets boy in a band trope. Yay.)

(NaNoWriMo 2020 project)

The famous musician story (this thing doesn’t have a title right now and I’m not even going to try)

Stupid, trope-y nonsense idea that I came up with for my own personal amusement and nothing else. I’ve written a few chapters of it but genuinely have no idea where this falls in the hierarchy of things that I want to get done. Long story short, she’s in grad school for history, he’s a famous musician in town recording for a new album, they meet in the library, she pretends she has no idea who he is, and shenanigans ensue.

And that is where I think I’m going to leave it. There’s four other stories that I can think of off the top of my head that I could theoretically add to this list, but they are legitimately just ideas right now so they can be added at a later date when they’ve manifested themselves a little more strongly. There’s also another quartet in the Willow Hill universe that I came up with in high school that could theoretically be added but I think I might just steal those character names and give them their own little world instead. We’ll see.

Basically, if you didn’t get the point from this list: I am working on a lot of things, and when I say I’m writing, it could mean literally anything on this list (or any of the other ideas that I have floating around). The stories/universe here are the most likely candidates for my time, depending on whether I’m doing a deep dive into my writing or just playing around with something fun, and hopefully (god, hopefully) I’ll be able to move one or two of these to a “completed works” list in the next year(ish). 

(Or at least, as complete as a draft ever gets before you start going in on it again.)

[peaceisadirtyword]

Invisible II (Ivar/Reader)

A/N: Sorry for taking so long... I had a rough time these days, that’s why this is so bad😅 I hope you like it anyway... If you don’t, I can always delete and rewrite! Y’all liked the first part so much I am really scared of disappointing you, especially when this fic is really important to me... Sorry in advance.

Btw I have already started with my Vikings rewriting! And I'm really excited with that one, I hope I can have it soon!💕

Warnings: Mentions of rape, loss of virginity, a bit of smut (not detailed), angst, drama in general. Please if this is too much for you don’t read it. Remember it’s never your fault though. Also mentions of alcohol and violence, Ivar drunk. Nothing written under the cut makes any sense. I am truly sorry for this disaster.

Words: 3538 (it’s shit and long, I think I tried to fix it and that’s why it’s too long but I failed)

I cannot put the link to the first part :( sorry, I will reblog it so enter my blog if you want to read it😘

gif isn’t mine

It wasn't like you had never been alone with a man before. It was because you had never been alone with a man who actually wanted you. 

Of course you were being polite when you invited him to your home. It was cold outside, and you wanted to have a talk with Einar to get to know him better. He seemed like a really interesting man. 

You had drank a bit, too, and you served some wine Aslaug had gifted you, and it was strong... 

Einar wasn't drunk, but you were smaller and hadn't eaten as much as him. And so it happened. 

You couldn't really remember how, but you ended up underneath him, not really knowing what was happening, and then feeling a sharp pain between your legs. Einar moaned and you frowned. 

He didn't even kiss you. He didn't do any of those things men were supposed to do while taking one woman's virginity. He wasn't as caring and sweet as he had been while talking to you. 

You asked him to stop, with tears rolling down your cheeks and your hands pushing him. But he didn't stop. He kept going and it hurt so much... 

You closed your eyes, wishing he would finish soon and leave you alone. 

When he did, he just got dressed and left. He didn't ask you if you were okay, if you had enjoyed it, he didn't tell you he was sorry for hurting you. 

When he closed the door, you sighed in relief. The truth was: you didn't want to deal with him in that moment. It was better to just try to forget what had happened. 

You felt stupid. You had been so determined to show Ivar you weren't his lap dog that you went too far. Obviously you should have stayed in a public place to find out about his intentions with you. 

You felt a sharp pain between your legs, it was just as if he was still inside you. There were blood stains on the furs that covered your bed. 

Trying to control your tears, you curled under the covers, pressing your legs together and closing your eyes tightly. 

Ivar furrowed his brow when he saw him going out of your house. He was still fixing his pants and he knew what had happened. How could you give yourself to that guy? He didn't remember seeing him around, and scoffed when he saw him stumbling around and trying to get to the great hall. He didn't even know how to drink properly. 

He looked at your house again. The lights were on, so you probably were awake. 

He thought about knocking on your door, but he didn't want to see your bed unmade by another man, your hair disheveled and your body full of marks. 

Ivar had always done a good job keeping the men from Kattegat away from you. Once, a man wanted to buy and free you so he would be able to marry you, when you were still his mother's slave. He heard him talking to the queen. Ivar managed to make that man disappear, and you never knew about his offer. 

But that night he had been too slow. As you were angry at him, you had sat down as far from him as you could, next to his brothers. And he was too busy glaring at you for ignoring him to pay attention to the man that hadn't taken his eyes off of you for hours.

The fact that you had left with him had broken his heart. But he understood he deserved it. At least a bit. 

Ivar felt a hard slap on his head and turned, grabbing his axe and ready to sink it on the face of the person that dared to disturb him. Though his face softened when he saw Floki. 

The boatbuilder giggled at Ivar, and moved to sit down next to him.

"What are you doing here, Ivar? Watching her house?"

"I was just taking some air" he answered, scoffing "There's too many people inside"

"You're even a worse liar than your father" Floki giggled again. He knew everything. 

"She left with him" Ivar frowned, incapable of hiding it anymore "With a man she met five minutes ago"

"Well, I can recall two of your brothers doing the same" Floki raised an eyebrow "Hvitserk is asleep on the bench, too drunk, but he already left twice with some girls... And that didn't bother you"

"But they are not Y/N" he pressed his lips together.

"And who's Y/N to you?"

"She's..." He frowned. Who were you to him? Not a friend, not a slave "Someone"

"Someone you clearly care about but treat like rubbish" Floki's tone dropped. He loved Ivar, but he loved you too, and never approved the way he treated you "I don't understand, Ivar"

"I don't like how she treats me"

Floki frowned.

"What are you talking about, boy? She treats you too well, much better than you actually deserve" 

"She treats me like if she was in love with me, and we all know that's not possible, so acting as if I was the love of her life, blushing and smiling, when I know she would never be with someone like me" 

"Someone like you?"

"A cripple"

"You know, Ivar, I thought you were the smartest in your family" Floki sighed "Now I see you're just another fool; stop feeling pity for yourself and open your eyes, she could have been with any of your brothers, with any man she wanted, and she chose you, but you pushed her away and now she's moving on, while you're here moping”.

Ivar scoffed, rolling his eyes at Floki's words The worst thing was that he knew he was right. 

"I would apologize to her" the boatbuilder shrugged "She's forgiving, she will forget it, but you must stop being an asshole to her, Ivar"

The pain hadn't faded away in the morning, and you were afraid you'd get pregnant. So you went to see the only person you knew who would help you. 

Helga was cooking, excited as the Ragnarssons were there again. She loved to have people at home, to cook for them and to hear them talking and moving around the house. When the house was all empty and quiet, everything reminded her of her daughter. 

You froze when you saw Ubbe and Sigurd outside, helping Floki with something. Probably, Ivar and Hvitserk were around too, and you didn't want to see the youngest brother in that moment. 

You entered the house, biting your lip and frowning when you heard Helga scolding someone.

"I can't cook if you keep eating the ingredients, Hvitserk!"

Ivar chuckled as Helga hit Hvitserk with a kitchen rag. He retreated with his mouth full, raising his hands. 

It was Hvitserk who saw you first. He smiled brightly and waved at you, still chewing the food he just stole. Ivar and Helga turned to the door to see you standing in there, biting your lip.

"Hi" you muttered, feeling as if you'd start crying if you spoke louder.

"Y/N, my dear, come in!" Helga quickly welcomed you, hugging you tightly and smiling. Though her smile faded when she saw your reddened eyes and your lower lip trembling. 

Ivar looked away, angry. He would have loved to kick you out of the house, he couldn't even look at you... As if he did he imagined you fucking that man. 

"Is everything okay, Y/N?" Hvitserk frowned, noticing how you were at the verge of tears. His brother then looked at you, his angry scowl turning into a worried one as he didn't see you smiling happily as you always were. 

"Yes, I..." You tried to smile to ease their worry, taking Helga's hands between yours "I just need your help, Helga..."

"Of course, love" she smiled warmly, taking you to the bedroom, understanding you didn't want to speak about it in front of the brothers "Ivar, please, watch the food, don't let your brother eat it"

Ivar's eyes were glued to you. He didn't understand, what had happened to you?

Helga then turned to you, and you couldn't help but start crying. 

"Hey, hey, what happened to you?" She shushed you, drying your tears with her hands.

"I'm sorry I... It's my fault" you sighed "I... Yesterday, at the feast I... I met a man... He was so nice and handsome I thought... Gods I'm so stupid" you covered your face with your hands "He told me we should go to my house, and I said yes... I had drank a bit and... Well I cannot really remember how..."

"Y/N, breathe" Helga caressed your cheek "I'm sure it's not your fault, love, come on" she hugged you "Did he force you?"

"No... I don't know, I just told him to stop and he didn't... I" you sobbed, hugging her tightly.

"It's okay, it wasn't your fault..." She caressed your hair softly "Come on, it's okay, you can report this to the queen and she will make him pay"

"No" you panicked "Please don't make me tell the queen, she'll be so disappointed with me..."

"Alright, Y/N, calm down" Helga pressed her lips together "We'll tell her when you're ready, come on" she smiled softly "I'll give you some herbs that will help you"

You nodded, and she guided you back to the main room, where Ivar and Hvitserk were whispering about something. 

"Are you okay, Y/N?" Hvitserk repeated when he saw you "Did anything happen?"

"No, everything is fine" you smiled to him "I'm just tired, I drank too much yesterday"

Ivar didn't look at you. He looked even more angry and didn't look at you. Used to his behavior, you sat down next to the wooden table as Helga started preparing a infusion with some herbs you recognized. They were the ones the healers gave to women to avoid pregnancy. 

You excused yourself after drinking it, thanking Helga and saying goodbye to Hvitserk with a smile. Ivar kept ignoring you. 

At least until you left the house. 

"Y/N!" 

It was the first time you heard your name on his lips. He always called you slave or christian. 

"Yes?" You blinked twice before answering, confused "Ivar?"

"I heard you"

"What?" 

"I heard you talking to Helga" he clenched his jaw "It serves you right for fooling around with men you barely know" he spat and you frowned "If you were careful and stopped being so nice to everyone this wouldn't have happened and I wouldn't have to fight some guy now"

"Excuse me?" You felt the urge of running away from there and go home to keep crying, but you already had had enough "Look, Boneless, first of all that was a private conversation, and you didn't have any right to eavesdrop, who do you think you are?" You snapped, and he narrowed his eyes. It was the first time you talked back to him "And second, you're saying it's my fault for being nice? I'm sorry I'm not a heartless asshole like you, Ivar, not all of us have that gift of being so unpleasant to everyone. And I didn't ask you to fight anyone! If I went with him was mainly because you were being cruel with me, as always, and I wanted to make clear that yes, I might have been in love with you, but I have some dignity and enough self-esteem to realize you don't deserve me or my attention" you yelled. His eyes were wide in surprise and... was that pride?

"So leave me alone and I swear if you hear my private conversations again I will cut off your ears, even if it's the last thing I do!" You scoffed and turned around to go home, proud of standing up to him. 

Ivar looked at you speechless as you got away from him. Immediately regretting some of the things he said to you. His rage should be focused on the guy who forced you, not on you. 

But he couldn't help it. He saw you smiling to him, blushing. The same way you did whenever he entered the room. 

Did that mean that you were over him?

No, you couldn't possibly forget him in some days. He sighed. Floki was right. He cared about you, but... He obviously wasn't enough for you. He had made you cry more than once, Sigurd was right, you deserved someone who could make you happy and... He only made you miserable. 

_-_

"Don't you think he has had enough mead already, Hvitserk?"

"Ubbe, he needs it if he's going to do this"

"I don't think it's a good idea to give alcohol to an aggressive person"

"Shut up, I'm not aggressive" Ivar clenched his fists, looking at his brother "I'm just fine"

"You know, little brother, I never needed to get drunk so I could go and talk to a woman" Sigurd snickered.

"No, but you need a fucking musical instrument for them to approach you"

Hvitserk coughed to hide a laugh and Ubbe rolled his eyes. Sigurd glared at him, but stayed quiet as he kept cleaning his oud.  

Ivar asked his brothers for help to talk to you. He knew they had experience in things like this, and of course they helped him. 

Though he needed to have maybe two more cups before he felt ready to talk to you. 

"So, the plan is: you go to her house, apologize for being an asshole to her for years, then apologize again because she will probably tell you to fuck off, then apologize for eavesdropping her conversations and blaming her for being forced, and then you can tell her you feel the same for her but you were too stupid to realize it earlier, and then you improvise"

"What if she doesn't open the door?" Ubbe asked, amused. 

"I'll break it down"

"No you won't" Hvitserk glared at him "You'll insist but if she ignores you you'll go, let her talk to you when she's ready"

"Poor Y/N" Sigurd whispered, sighing.

"And stop drinking" Ubbe took the cup from Ivar's hands "You'll forget your own name if you keep going"

Ivar grunted, but rubbed his eyes before letting himself fall on his knees and start crawling to the door. 

"Good luck!" Hvitserk sounded even more excited than himself. 

You were finishing a soup for the next morning. You planned on taking it to Helga so she wouldn't have to cook that day, as a thank you for what she had done for you.

She had came to your home later that day, to talk to you and to comfort you. Thanks to her you were feeling a bit better, though you needed to be busy so you wouldn't think about it. 

And then someone knocked on your door, startling you. 

Should you open the door? The thought of Einar being at the other side of the door made you shiver softly... Surely he wouldn't try to hurt you, right?

But it wasn't Einar who you found.

"Ivar?" You frowned. He was sitting on the floor, his hair disheveled and his eyes unfocused.

"Hi" he cleared his throat "Can I... Can I enter?" 

He stuttered while talking, and blinked a few times when the lights of your home blinded him. 

"Yes..." You bit your lip, confused. You were still angry at him for what he said to you that morning, but you were curious about his presence at your house. 

He entered the house with slow and exaggerated movements. Grunting as he crawled to sit next to the fire. 

"Ivar... Are you drunk?" 

"No I just... drank a bit with my brothers" he said, his voice raising a few tones.

"What are you doing here?"

"I..." He cleared his throat again, biting his lip "I wanted to... Say that... I didn't mean what I said before... Or ever, I..."

You raised an eyebrow. You understood what he wanted to say, but you wanted to hear the magic word. 

"Yes?"

"I... Don't think it's your fault Y/N, he... didn't have the right to take advantage of you... And it's good you're nice, we... Need that kind of persons around here"

Obviously it was the alcohol talking. Ivar would never say that to you. 

"And?" you crossed your arms, waiting for him to continue with his poor excuse of an apology. 

"I... Don't mean anything I always tell you, you're not annoying or stupid, you're amazing, and I..." He blushed, and cursed, looking away from you. He just hoped he had drank enough to forget all of that in the morning "I'm too cruel with you"

"So... You mean you're sorry?"

He nodded frantically, relived he didn't have to keep apologizing. 

"Say it" you pushed, though a part of you wanted to cry in happiness. 

"I..." He growled, rubbing his eyes. He needed more alcohol to say that without dying in embarrassment "I am... Fuck" he rolled his eyes "I am sorry, Y/N"

You smiled softly. Of course you couldn't forgive him that easily, not after all the pain you had gone through because him. But it was a start. 

Ivar cleared his throat as you stayed silent, uncomfortable. It was the first time he apologized to someone and though he felt better, he still preferred to solve things with an axe and some blood. 

"Okay, thank you" you shrugged, sitting down on the floor next to him "I appreciate the effort you made by coming here and saying all of this... I would like to apologize too, you're not a heartless asshole... Well sometimes you are, but I know you Ivar" you bit your lip while he blinked in confusion "I've known you for years, and you have a heart, a big heart that you hide from everyone because you're afraid someone will break it again... If you stopped pushing people away and let us get close to you you wouldn't feel that lonely"

Ivar felt tears gathering on his eyes, but managed to hold them back as he looked to the burning fireplace. 

"It is true what everyone says?"

"What do they say?"

"That you're in love with me"

You gulped. You could take advantage of his poor self-love and tell him you wouldn't ever fall in love with him, but just the thought of hurting him broke your heart. And it didn't mind if it saved your dignity. 

"Yes" you avoided his eyes "I thought that was obvious... I understand if you don't feel the same"

"I thought you were nice to me because you pitied me" he muttered "Everyone who is nice to me is because they pity me"

"Even if you don't want to believe it, there's people who actually love you"

"I do feel the same" he shrugged "At least that's what I think, I've never been in love with anyone, so I don't know"

He wish he could stop talking. He was going to kill Hvitserk, what kind of mead had he given him? He was saying way more things than he wanted to. 

You felt your heart beating faster and faster in your chest. 

There's no way he's in love with you. 

"Ivar..." You whispered "Would you be telling me this if you weren't drunk?"

"No" he answered, turning his head to look at you "As I wouldn't tell you how I can't wait to kill that bastard, Y/N, for hurting you, and I wouldn't tell you the soup you made the other day was the best I ever had, or how much I like it when you enter the great hall smiling in pure happiness, there's a lot things I would never tell you... But here I am"

"Ivar you hurt me a lot..."

"I know"

"You make me feel worthless and stupid, you're mean to me, you scream at me when I'm only trying to help... I was nothing to you, just a plaything you liked to torment and torture, you liked it when I was afraid of you... Because you know I never talked back at you or slapped you or anything because I'm not like that... And now you tell me you're in love with me but you wouldn't say it if you weren't drunk"

Ivar didn't say anything. He knew you were right, he knew he had been the worst person towards you. 

"You say you want to kill Einar for hurting me, but you hurt me too"

"So you don't believe me"

"I didn't say that..." You sighed, you didn't want to hurt him, but you couldn't just forgive him "I just would have liked it more if you came here sober"

"If I was sober, Y/N, I would be an asshole to you, because I can't fucking talk to you when I'm sober. The alcohol at least makes me forget you're way too good for me"

"Wha...?"

"You want me to show you what I feel for you?" He scoffed, raising his voice "Okay, I will, I will show the fucking world how I feel about you"

Tags: @mblaqgi @alicedopey @cbouvier23 @lol-haha-joke @hallowed-heathen @ivarslittlebadgirl @naaladareia @tephi101 @captstefanbrandt @love-hate-love @titty-teetee @thisisparadisemylove @readsalot73 @moondustmemories @thevikingsheaux @therealcalicali @fuckthatfeeling @chimera4plums @blushingskywalker @awkwardfangirl02 @cynthianokamaria @cris101071 @radiotramp @the-nargles-made-me-do-it

I hope I didn’t forget anyone💔 I’m sorry about what I did in there, I know what you’re thinking😂 but I didn’t want to leave you without part 2. 

I’m starting to worry because I cannot fucking write properly for Ivar now and that’s frustrating.

Anyway thank you for reading😘

[the-lupine-sojourner]

Takara Yamada’s Hero Academia Bonus Chapter 1 [Eijiro Kirishima/OC] [Female!Aizawa/Hizashi]

So! I read This post by @bnha-imagines-grill and (of COURSE!) my brain went full fanfic and out come this. I am so sorry, BNHA-Imagines-Grill! If you want, I will delete this! I just couldn’t help it!! Also tagging @elite-guard-hardygal cus I wanna surprise you for a change, lolz. 

Also, @dailyojiromashirao is the BIGGEST sweetheart ever and I love them so much!! My phone was being stupid last night when I posted this, and I forgot to tag you then, and it wouldn’t save it when I went back and tried, so not I’m doing it on my laptop.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy and feel free to send an ask with requests for more Bonus Chapters! I’d love to try it out! Now, onto the story!

God Bless and Good Day! 

~The Lupine Sojourner

(Wowie is that a huge GIF I picked. Sorry!)

It was an accident, really.

I should have known not to get so careless while trying to dance as I practiced making shapes with my Quirk. But here I was, having a lot of fun and getting careless.

It was really fun, but I’d danced too close to the table and broke a cup, luckily full of water, so it was easy to clean up the spilled liquid. I am panic-stricken as the seconds tick by before scrambling to scoop the pieces up.

In my haste, I got a decent-sized chunk of glass rammed into my hand. I somehow keep my outburst to an extremely loud hiss. It hurt!!

Blood started seeping out of the gash and onto the floor, where I tried to mop it up with a nearby hand towel, but ended up accidentally jostling the shard and causing both another loud hiss and more blood on the floor. I just sink to the floor and sob, the pain ramping up as the tiny puddle of blood grows.

Suddenly, I’m being picked up and carried to the sink, and I was so focused on my pain and the panic of having broken something not two weeks into my stay with the Yamadas that I didn’t realize just who it was at first.

Mr. Yamada himself; he’d stayed home again to watch me. He’d been so nice to me. He’s gonna be so mad I broke his cup! I mean, he hadn’t said it outright, but I was most likely not allowed to use my Quirk indoors, right? Like at the orphanage? So I was in even more trouble for that! I sat there as he put my hand under warm water, silent (a rare thing where he’s concerned.) and thoughtful. “Are you okay?” He asks. “Gashes can be serious and pretty scary.” I blink. What?

“I...yeah...but...I…” He smiles, adding a little soap to the gash and gently rubbing it in. I grimace, hissing in pain. Maybe this was my punishment; having the wound cleaned with soap.

“You what?” Hizashi coaxes, wrapping gauze on it after attaching butterfly stitches to keep it closed. “That’ll do for now.” He notes, smiling. This was weird. He should be mad. I broke the rules! “It should last for a while, but I’ll change it before you go to bed, okay?” I nod, unable to speak, let alone look him in the eye.

“I broke the glass!” I squeak suddenly, forcing myself to own up to my mistake. Maybe he’d go easier if I confess... “I didn’t mean to, Mr. Yamada! Honest! I was just playing, and I was using my Quirk and I’m so sorry! I know I was bad and- -” I break off and hiccup and wipe my eyes as more tears flow, “and I know I shouldn’t have used my Quirk and I’m really really sorry, Mr Yamada! I promise I won’t do it ever again!” I was so terrified of being kicked out or punished, I could only sit there, quacking. Mr. Yamada can only stare at me for several seconds.

Probably deciding the best punishment. 

When he reaches out, I instinctively flinch away before halting. I had to accept my punishment, after all.. He gently draws me into his lap and I am stunned to see tears going down his cheeks. Were they mad tears? Was he upset cus I happened to break a glass that meant a lot to him? I sit in his lap, stunned, then he draws me in for a tight hug. “You dear, sweet, sweet child.” He whimpers into my hair. “Never, ever promise not to use your Quirk again, okay?” He continues, drawing back to grip my chin softly in his fingers, making me look at him. He looks so serious and sad. I wonder why. “Takara, please listen to me very carefully; never be afraid to use your Quirk, inside, outside, or even for amusement. I am not, nor will I ever be, mad at you, I promise. Let’s clean the glass up together, though, okay?” I can only nod, sniffling and following him. Luckily, it was a hardwood floor, so it was a simple matter of moving the water to the sink and holding the dustpan on my end (after Mr. Yamada carried me to my room to grab my pair of flip-flops; he had weird banana slippers on) as Mr. Yamada swept the glass into it, then grabbed a cereal box. “When cleaning up glass, it’s important to be very careful and very thorough, okay? Or you’ll end up with gashes on your hand and glass on the floor.” He smiles, nudging my side as he closes up the box and puts it in the trash can. I nod, squirming a little in guilt. But, I guess, if teasing was my only punishment, I could take it. “There. You always put the broken glass in a box or other container, alright? That way, it doesn’t destroy the trash bag.” He opens his arms again and I am still so relieved he wasn’t mad that I run into his arms. “Tik-Tak, you know I love you, right?” He’d said it a few times, but don’t adults usually say that to kids that are with them? That they’re watching? I nod. He seemed to really mean it...and he said I could call him by a different name...

“I love you, too...Otōsan.” I reply slowly. It was true. I did really like living with them and Mr. Yamada was super nice! Plus, he had said that I could call him Otōsan, so it must be okay, right?

Of course, Mrs. Yamada was amazing, too, but she wasn’t here. I’d have to tell her I love her when she gets back, maybe even finally call her Kāsan. Mr. Yamada grins in utter happiness and hugs me tight, wiggling in elation on the ground.

“Awww, Tik-Tak!” He squeals, then ruffles my hair. “Thanks. Now, how about you show me what you were doing? I wanna see!” I blush and stammer as I try to think of a reason not to. It was just some stupid dancing with water! It wasn’t important or interesting! But...the look on Otōsan’s face was too much and I eventually nod. I then turn the faucet on just enough to get water and begin. I make different shapes and twirl and dance, finding that joy from before I broke the glass again. He claps and watches me, laughing. I laugh, too, surprised when Otōsan joins me.

We dance together for a while before Otōsan suggests dinner.

=#=#=#=#=

Kāsan arrives later that night, when I’m supposed to be going to bed. However, I’d told myself that I’d tell her myself about the glass and how Otōsan handled it, letting her decide what to do now. So I walk out.

“-ta, I just...she looked so scared! It was just a stupid glass, but she was convinced that she was in a lot of trouble, and when she told me she didn’t think she was allowed to use her Quirk, I froze up! I’d been in that position too many times when I was her age, and, seeing it repeated, in our kid to boot, I just- -I just froze and she sat there shaking! She was so sure I was going to- -I’m not sure what she thought I was going to do, so I just hugged her and made her promise not to be afraid of using her Quirk ever again. I promised her I wouldn’t get mad.” I tentatively peek around the corner, scared of being noticed, but curious. I see Kāsan hugging Otōsan, rubbing his back.

“Hizashi, you can’t blame yourself. The girl lost her parents, and I saw the way that orphanage was run; the children were left to themselves under a few stricts rules, mainly against using their Quirks inside, but they weren’t supposed to use them in general. It was part of the reason why I was so eager to get her out of there.”

“I hated that look on her face! I hated that I made her look that way!” Otōsan sobs, clinging tighter to Kāsan’s shirt. Kāsan continues rubbing her back. I just stood there, stunned. Otōsan felt like he was responsible for the way I reacted? How was he to blame?!

“Love, it wasn’t you.” Kāsan insists. “It was the idiots running the orphanage. They don’t know the first thing about raising super-powered children, despite all the research done on the subject. Hizashi, you didn’t do this. Idiots did.” I can’t just watch and listen anymore and decide to come out, tears welling in my eyes.

“Otōsan…” I whimper, wiping my eyes and sniffling. “It wasn’t you!” I insist. “I just...I saw what happened to kids that broke the rules at the orphanage. They...they were locked in a closet and left there! If it was really bad, they were put in a different orphanage. I didn’t mean to make you sad!” I sob and run to give him a hug. He’s stunned.

“Wh-what are you doing up, Musume?” He asks softly, wrapping his arms around me instinctively.

“I wanted to talk to Kāsan, and I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but…” I squeeze him. “I didn’t want you to feel bad anymore!” Otōsan hugs me back. If I had looked, I would have seen a rare full smile on Kāsan’s face.

“Your parents were right to name you ‘treasure’, Musume.” He murmurs, choking up with emotion. I giggle.

“Otōsan, you’re being silly.” I tease. Kāsan comes over and joins in the hug.

“No, he’s right, Musume.” She says, chuckling. “Please, tell us if you feel like you can’t use your Quirk again. It isn’t true at all. At least, not in or around the house. At school, you have to obey their rules, but Hizashi and I want to help you with your Quirk. You’ve got very impressive control so far, and we can help you grow even stronger! How about it?” I nod eagerly.

“That sounds perfect!” And from that day on, it was Quirk training in the evenings after dinner, followed by a bit of TV time, then bedtime. I went to bed every night tired, but very happy that my new parents loved me and were helping me advance my Quirk.

It was a great new life I had. I wouldn’t trade it for the world!

[flowerfan2]

Winds of Change - Chapter 1

Stucky, 46k total, A03. Post CACW.  This fic is fully written, and will post 2-3x a week.

Bucky’s still got some healing to do after the doctors in Wakanda rouse him from sleep and make sure there are no more deadly triggers lurking in his brain.  He decides it should happen where he can have some peace and quiet, as well as a little distance from Steve’s overwhelming presence.  When he sees an ad for a “Winter Caretaker” he takes the job, but it turns out to be not so peaceful after all.

Or, how Bucky realized that while he still needs to heal, it wouldn’t be such a bad thing for him and Steve to do it together.

Chapter 1

“You may stay here in Wakanda as my guest for as long as you like,” T’Challa says, once the doctors have roused Bucky from sleep and made sure there are no more deadly triggers lurking in his brain, “but I did promise Steve Rogers that I would keep him apprised of your status.”  The “it’s only fair” is left unsaid, but Bucky hears it anyway.

“Let me tell him,” Bucky replies.  Now, several hours later, he is in his room, staring at the computer screen, trying to figure out what to say.

It has been two weeks since he came out of cryo, two weeks full of poking and prodding both mental and physical, two weeks when the thought of Steve has never been far from his mind.  T’Challa has gone along with Bucky’s wish that he be allowed to get through this process without anyone else knowing that he was awake.  He wanted to make sure it would work, first; that he would no longer be able to be used as a weapon against his will.  Now that part of him, at least, has been healed.  He can’t put this off any longer.    

 Bucky opens up a new email, too chicken to call Steve on the phone like a grown-up.  

 “Dear Steve,” he begins, the vibranium fingers of his new left hand clicking on the keys as he goes.

It’s me.  I’m okay, according to the docs here.  T’Challa can fill you in.  I’ve given him permission to give you the details, if you want them.

I need to thank you for everything you did for me.  I hear things are better between you and the Avengers, which is good.  I didn’t mean to come between you and your friends.

I know you are going to want to see me, but maybe wait a while?  I need some time to-

Bucky gets stuck on this part.  He doesn’t know what excuse to give Steve for why he can’t see him right now.  Part of him would love to let Steve drop everything and come get him, as he knows full well he’d do.  He thinks about the way Steve smiles at him.  How he claps Bucky on the back, eyes full of affection.  It would be so easy to let Steve shepherd him around, take care of him through whatever confusion is still haunting his abused mind.   But the thought doesn’t sit right with him.  

It’s not only that he thinks he isn’t worth Steve’s time, although there’s some of that in the mix. It’s something he can’t really put his finger on.  Whatever it is, he knows he doesn’t want to be swept up into Steve’s orbit, not right now. He just wants some peace and quiet.

This is the first time he’s woken from cryo without pain, without more than a momentary twinge of fear. Without someone giving him orders. He’s not sure what he wants, but he wants to be the one to figure it out.

He returns to the email, deletes a few words, and finishes writing.  He reads over the end of the message, changes the closing a few times (he finally settles on “yours always, Bucky”) and then, his stomach clenching, hits send.

There’s a shower in his suite nicer than any he’s ever had at his disposal before, so he shuts himself in there, using every ridiculous bath product in the room.  He tells himself not to expect an immediate reply back from Steve, he’s probably asleep or out on a mission, or busy with his friends. And even if Steve reads his email right away, he might be too annoyed to write back.  Or, worse, he might tell Bucky to go fuck himself.

Bucky drags out his shower for as long as he can, cleaning every nook and cranny.  He dries himself carefully, slathering lotion on his body, even the tender skin where his metal arm attaches to his shoulder.  Leaving the bathroom he pulls on some of the white lounge pants everyone seems to wear for comfort here, and gets into bed. Filled with trepidation, he opens the laptop and checks his email.

There are two messages, both from Steve.

The first is heartbreakingly short:

 Dear Bucky,

 I understand.

 Steve

The next message was sent fifteen minutes later, and Bucky sighs with relief as he reads it.

 Dear Bucky,

 I can be an ass sometimes, but you know that already.  Natasha told me that if I didn’t send you a better message immediately she was going to beat the crap out of me, and she wasn’t kidding (she says hi, by the way).

 I’m so very grateful that you are alive.  I can’t pretend not to be disappointed that you won’t let me come see you, but that’s just selfish of me.  When I stop to think about how lucky I am that you are out there somewhere in the world, well, that will have to be good enough for now.  (You do want to see me again at some point, just not right this minute, right?)

I have so many ideas, so many things I’d like to do with you.  But they can wait.

Please keep in touch. I miss you, but I swear I’ll respect your wishes no matter what they are.

Yours always,

Steve

Bucky reads over the message a few times, a lump forming in his throat.  Steve is so sweet.  It’s not as if he really believed Steve would shut him out.  He trusts Steve more than anyone, but then again he has little idea what’s been going on in Steve’s life since he’s been in cryo.

He hates that he made Steve feel sad, even a little bit.  Logically he knew it would happen, although it’s hard for Bucky to fathom why he means so much to Steve after everything Bucky did as the Winter Soldier. But Steve’s question about whether he ever wants to see him again is honest, and he’s glad he asked it, even if it stings.  

He hadn’t planned on getting into a back and forth conversation with Steve, but there’s no doubt in his mind about the answer to his question.

 Steve,

Punk.  Of course I want to see you again.  Now go off and save the world and let a fella get some sleep.

Bucky

He closes the laptop and sets it off to the side of his ridiculously big bed.  Bucky knows Steve will respond, probably with a lighthearted joke, and he smiles in anticipation.  He’ll save it for the morning, something to look forward to, before he starts on the gargantuan task of trying to decide what to do with his mess of a life.

*********

It takes Bucky almost two months to make plans.  Wakanda is pleasant enough, but he doesn’t want to stay here permanently.  For one, although T’Challa is unerringly polite and generous, he’s putting Bucky up out of some good Samaritan sense of obligation, not due to any actual knowledge of Bucky himself.  And Bucky’s not always comfortable with how people look at him, knowing his history.

Mostly, he wants to go home.

He realizes this as he hikes one morning through the rainforest.  There’s a clearing leading up to a little waterfall, and he stops and crouches down, splashing water on his face.  It’s beautiful here, no question.  People probably pay bundles of money to travel to places like this.  But it doesn’t feel real.  

Later that night, he starts looking for a job.  Nothing fancy, nothing spooky.  Nothing that requires him to speak any language other than the one he spoke as a kid.    

Bucky knows he could return to government work – a guy named Phil Coulson offered him a spot in intelligence in whatever group has now taken SHIELD’s place – but he’s not really interested in that kind of thing right now.  He’s free to do whatever he wants, and he can do it legally, too, thanks to a presidential pardon, a U.S. passport with his honest to god birthdate on it, and a bank account with seventy-something years of military back pay, which is quite a stack of cash.

 (He tries not to think too hard about all the effort Steve and his friends went to while he was under, getting the mechanics of his life in order for him, not knowing when he’d wake up – or if he’d wake up.  Yet another good deed he can’t repay.)

 Sam Wilson had sent him some links to resources for veterans, and it’s one of those that leads him to the job opening.  It’s titled “Winter Caretaker,” and he has to laugh at the fitting irony of it.  

 Winter caretaker needed for Martha’s Vineyard home.  Must be willing to do routine maintenance, snow removal, water plants and care for three (very shy) cats.  Car for local use, moped and bicycle provided.

 It doesn’t pay much, but then Bucky really isn’t in this for the money.  He does some quick research, confirming that Martha’s Vineyard is an island off the south coast of Massachusetts.  It’s a popular summer destination, but its off-season population drops dramatically.  Without overthinking it, he emails the owner.

 Within a few days, it’s settled.  Nora, the owner of the house, is an artist who seems to be a little paranoid about leaving her home unsupervised while she travels, and keeps throwing out more reasons why having someone stay there is such a good idea.  Bucky is quick to agree with her, as he knows from way too much experience how easily an uninhabited building can be used for something unsavory, although he has his doubts about whether this particular location (“it’s kind of rural, actually,” Nora writes, “the island is bigger than people realize, it can take half an hour to drive from one end to the other”) is going to be in demand for criminal activity.

 After Nora assures herself that Bucky is the right person for the job (“you won’t get scared out there by yourself, will you?” is Bucky’s favorite question so far) they plan to meet at the house in two weeks, and it’s done.  He may not know where his life is going, but three (“really, they’re ridiculously shy”) cats are counting on him, so off he goes.

 **********

Bucky may be many things, but he’s not stupid, and he knows full well that the fact that he is moving back to the U.S. is probably of interest to Steve.  Except for a brief email exchange a few weeks ago which sounded disturbingly like something Bucky would have written to his old Aunt Ethel (“Hi Steve – just wanted to let you know I’m still doing fine.  T’challa’s docs have tinkered with my arm a bit, it’s quieter now.  Hope you are well.  Yours always, Bucky.”) he hasn’t communicated with Steve.  It would defeat the purpose, he thinks, although he’s not still clear on what the purpose is.

 He misses Steve, though. It’s an ache that’s always there in his chest, and as he sits in his appointed suite, duffel packed with his few belongings, he lets himself feel it.  He’s flying to Boston tomorrow (by way of Berlin, which makes him squirm with discomfort), then taking a bus to Woods Hole to catch the ferry to the island. It would be the easiest thing in the world to give Steve his flight information and meet up with him for a few hours, or even a few days.  

 But that’s not the plan, and for better or worse, he’s going to stick to the plan.  

 He starts typing out an email, biting his lip in concentration.  Because not hiding, telling the truth when it matters, is also part of the plan, so he’s got to walk this middle ground, and it isn’t getting any easier.

 Steve –

 I’m coming back to the states.  Please thank Sam for sending me all that info about jobs (and tell me honestly, is he pissed about me breaking his wings?  Because I still feel terrible).  I’ll keep you posted.

 Yours always, Bucky

 The response comes after he has gotten into bed, but he’s not anywhere near asleep.

 Dear Bucky –

 I’m really glad to hear you’re coming back, although I imagine T’Challa will miss your sparkling wit.

 You ass, Bucky thinks, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

 Don’t worry about Sam.  As soon as we all kissed and made up Tony built him a brand new set of wings, even better than the old ones.  It helped make up for the fact that Tony never got a chance to examine your arm – he’s still convinced that the Russians had help, that there’s no way they could have pulled off something that impressive with their “pathetic lack of technology.”  Don’t get me started on how he feels about you having a Wakandan engineered one now. He keeps trying to weasel an invitation from T’Challa but I guess the King has more important things on his mind than a play date with Tony Stark.

But seriously, Buck, thanks for telling me where you’ll be (although don’t think I didn’t notice that you actually didn’t give me much of a clue – it’s a mighty big country, Bucky). I’d love to see you, pal. Hopefully you know that.  And if you ever need anything, anything at all, just call - wherever you are, I’ll be there (have you listened to James Taylor, or Carole King?  Coulson put them on my list, they’re great.  Call me a sap, if you want – everyone else does).

Yours always,

Steve

It doesn’t make Bucky as uncomfortable as he would have thought to know that Steve and his friends are talking about him.  He’d actually gotten a long and rambling message from Tony, declaring a “permanent truce” and attaching a file of research on how his father may or may not have been involved with a plan to create more super soldiers.  “I still can’t tell,” Tony’s message concluded, “what side my dad was on.  But he was in control of his own mind.  You weren’t.”

[lady-zombies]

Dear diary,

Ive decided to try and start using tumblr as a place to put down my thoughts. I could be one of those whiny people on facebook but those people don’t deserve to know my thoughts. A bunch of random strangers on the internet however is a different story. Besides, I doubt not more than 3 people would even read these all the way through anyway. This is more for myself. I think if I don’t put thes thoughts down somewhere they’re just going to keep swirling around in my brain. Depression and anxiety are shitty fucking things to have. I’m constantly on a roller coaster when it comes to taking my pills every day. I’ll do really good for a few months and then something happened and for whatever reason I stop taking them. Not right away but slowly I’ll notice the difference. It’s been a good solid month since I’ve taken my pills and holy shit I’m feeling it mr krabs. My job is fucking shit. Taco Bell more like taco hell. I’ve been there for almost 2 years now and it maybe was okay at one point but now it’s just a absolutely completely toxic environment. Fuck those people and fuck that one chick in particular. As I go on with this now my head is just swirling all these thoughts all these different situations that are that have led up to this I have let up to me feeling like this when I thought I couldn’t feel like this anymore every time I take my pills for good amount of time and feel good I think that there’s no way I could ever feel like this again I feel like I’m trapped in a hole and I can see the top but there’s no fucking ladder I can’t climb up and there’s nobody to help me. I can’t keep my mind straight. I think writing about it will help but every time I do I’ll start writing about one thing I I can’t even finish that one thing because there’s so many other things popping in my head that are just a lead up to that because of that this happened because of this that happen I don’t know how work is awful my home life is awful school fucking sucks. Cosmetology schools my dream wanted to do it since I was little and other models done I can’t even appreciate the fact that it’s another part of my life part of my goal lifelong plan is almost done like I can’t even be excited because I’m too busy feeling sorry for myself and feeling shitty. I’m constantly stuck between thinking that depression is legit and I really have all these problems and I thinking that maybe I’m just being a little bitch and things are that bad and I need to suck it up so self-critical like I hate myself but I hate everybody house I want to do is lay in my room. Anytime at work I want to be home when I’m home I’m like I got shit to do I got to fucking clean my room because it’s a mess my room is resemblance of my life a fucking mess but I never clean it because I’m a lazy piece of shit and I never have laundry done because I’m a lazy piece of shit. I have school projects do that is stressing me the fuck out because I need to do it with more that something happened that I need to do the more that I don’t want to do it I just don’t give a fuck I don’t care but I should care and I don’t know everything so contradicting my mind hates else hates what’s happening I don’t know everything is just fucking Lame and I can’t even. Graduation is almost here I’m almost done cosmetology school, something that I want to do for the longest time. I’m having a hard time at school and now I am I only work two days at work and can’t even handle those two days. I can’t do anything I’m barely hanging on by a string I’m so close to breaking again for like the millionth time in my life. I wish I could get a brain transplant fml. I know pretty much exactly what I need to do to get my life better right now I know that I probably need to get back on my pills for one thing maybe go back to therapy would help to but in the past I’ve had a hard time keeping consistent see what showed up with her paid to because of work or because I just suck at going. I have no motivation for anything I have ambition for days but no motivation to be found. maybe it’s the weed. maybe just how I am. Or maybe I’m just acted like a little bitch like a millennial ungrateful young person. Idk I need a friend but I’m so scared of letting people into my life because I’m so different, it’s fucked me up.i don’t even know where this post is going I’m about to just delete it all. Fuckity fuck fuck. Fuck all those bitches at Taco Bell and fuck that piece of shit school that I’m attending. Fuck my brother and his stupid ass literally dumb ass girlfriend. Fuck this life I was given. I don’t plan on giving up because fuck me if I’m not going to get where I want to get in life. I know what I want. And I might be a little slow slow at getting it but it’s going to happen. Baby steps I guess. I just don’t want to load my self. I don’t want to become so socially awkward that o start to loose my ambition. As of now I’m a one person show. I don’t need no one but my mama. But I’d like to believe that one day I could be loved. But for now who could ever love a fat piece of shit like me. Someone whose a never been in a relation ship and who gets overly attached to their friends. Some one who is as mentally fucked up as me. As well as someone who is just straight up a weirdo. Ain’t. O body want that. And I can either fight it or accept it. Accept that I’m probably going to be alone. All I can do is love myself. It’s so hard. All of this is so hard. I’m barley going to be 20 and I’ve experienced so much and nothing at all. I’m going to be alone forever probably. At least I’ll have makeup I guess. I’m in a constant war of hating myself and wanting to die and thinking I deserve better and I am better. But who am I kidding. This whole thing is a freakin roller coaster. Also my niece stuck something in the toilet and it’s not flushing. God dammit.