#anyway. i never saw the sequel but i imagine it’s worse. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nekokoaa · 4 years ago

Text

After School Part II - Bakugo x Reader x Midoriya (18+)

Summary:

He was prepared for the insults, the hate, when all he was doing was discovering himself, just finding out the answers to his buried emotions. He knew this wouldn’t be healthy for his feelings, remembering those tears that rolled down his face when he watched you two declared your love for each other, the hurt that has been living with him ever since then. Would he really damage himself like that? Just to see Bakugo that way one more time?

Warnings: Explicit, angst, voyeurism, blowjobs, rough sex, sex toys, begging, threesome kind of

Part of the NSFW series Euphoria - Euphoria Masterlist

Also on AO3

Part one - After School (Recommended)

AC: Hey guys! Excited for this one. I recommend you read the first part before this one. It’s in the link above. Enjoy!

-----------------------------------------

After School part II – Bakugo x Midoriya x Reader (Sequel to After School)

Midoriya felt disgusted with himself yet he couldn’t stop his hand from rubbing up and down his hardened dick. He buried the side of his head against his pillow, gathering the white fabric into his mouth to muffle the moans he couldn’t contain. His eyes were tightly shut to avoid having to lock eyes with his posters of All Might. He didn’t need to feel anymore shameful than he already did. Being surrounded by images of his idol, them smiling proudly at him, it only made him feel guilty about his actions. Why am I doing this, he found himself asking just as he increased his pace, a certain blond teenager entering his imagination shortly. He let another moan get suppressed into the pillow, followed by gasps caused by the pleasure rising within his stomach.

It’s only been a week since Midoriya witnessed you getting fucked in the classroom by Bakugo and it was still fresh in his mind like he was rewatching a scene from a movie. He could remember every detail from your pleading moans, Bakugo’s groans to the sounds of slapping flesh and of course, those crimson eyes that bore into his own while he fucked you. Midoriya whined, fisting the sheets with his free hand as he felt his eyes tearing, pleasure and agony intertwining like brothers. It rose until he saw sparks in his vision, higher it went until all was white.

“Kac… chan…!” His hips stuttered, and then he felt wetness on his stomach and parts of his hand. He released the pillow from his clenched teeth, heavy pants rolled out of him as his lungs begged for air. He shielded his eyes with his cleaned hand soon becoming soiled with tears that rolled down his face. He didn’t know what to do. He felt as if he was too far gone in his feelings that he couldn’t just ignore how he felt towards Bakugo, but it hurt knowing that there was nothing he could do about it. The only thing he could do was lie in the dark in his room with his hand on his cock, soiled with his own cum, and his mind filled with Bakugo knowing he would never love him back.

Midoriya expected his day to start out the same as always. Even though he stumbled upon you and Bakugo a week ago, he was still able to maintain his normal school schedule. As well as Bakugo who carried on like that incident never happened but… today was different.

Midoriya caught you staring at him longer than he would’ve like and when he would meet your gaze, you would pretend that you weren’t staring at him but would make it obvious by the flush on your cheeks and the twiddling of your thumbs. There was even a moment in the cafeteria where you were sitting with Bakugo and you were both eying him and whispering to each other.

At that point, Midoriya panicked. Did you find out? Did Bakugo tell you? He was going to find a hole and bury himself alive if you found out.

What Midoriya didn’t expect was for him to be approached by Bakugo after school and with you standing behind him all shy and whatnot. He hadn’t expected to be cornered and pulled under one of the stairways, thrown against the wall with Bakugo’s hand slapped on the wall beside his head. Midoriya gulped, but also felt his pants getting tighter.

“Listen well, Deku,” he growled.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t—I didn’t—I won’t tell anyone about it…!”

“Shut it!” He lifted his hand off the wall and slammed it back down. Midoriya jumped, his eyes flickering between you and Bakugo. He didn’t realize he was giving you a pleading look, although fear might’ve best described it. It made you hold Bakugo’s other arm and you gave him a smile before looking at Midoriya with flushed cheeks.

“We’re not here to scare him, Katsuki.”

Bakugo scoffed, frowning as he shoved both of his hands in his pockets.

“Katsuki told me you saw us…” oh fuck, he was screwed. He was undeniably screwed. You had found out and now he was going to become the laughing stock of UA. The one who jerked off and came in his own pants to his childhood friend fucking his girlfriend. He could see the headlines in the papers. Rumors would spread, and no agency would want to sponsor him. He would be ruined. “And we were wondering…”

Midoriya shut his eyes and prepared for the worse.

“If you would want to… watch us again?”

Huh? Midoriya’s eyes shot open. Did he hear correctly? Your shyness returned again, and you were now burying your head in Bakugo’s arm. Midoriya ignored the pang of jealousy he felt. You spoke up again, cheeks flushed and eyes everywhere except at Midoriya.

“It was… exhilarating having someone watch us. I was a bit freaked out when I found out but…” you bit your bottom lip. “Lately, I’ve been having the best orgasms imagining someone watching us so…”

“Don’t get any bright ideas, this was all her plan,” Bakugo grumbled. “And all you’ll be doing is watching!”

“So, what do you think? Do you want to watch us… tonight? Katsuki’s parents are away.”

Midoriya was shocked, mouth agape, eyes so wide that they look like they were about to fall out. He thought you were here to ridicule him, yell at him for eying your boyfriend and somehow knowing that he was masturbating to your boyfriend every night. He was prepared for the insults, the hate, when all he was doing was discovering himself, just finding out the answers to his buried emotions. He knew this wouldn’t be healthy for his feelings, remembering those tears that rolled down his face when he watched you two declared your love for each other, the hurt that has been living with him ever since then. Would he really damage himself like that? Just to see Bakugo that way one more time?

“I-I’ll do it,” Midoriya spoke under his shaky breath, his eyes shooting straight in your direction when you jumped for joy. He hesitated to look at Bakugo, but something made him anyway and he soon regretted it. The disgust in his eyes were apparent, probably because Midoriya had agreed to watch him again. He sneered at the thought of it.

Perhaps Midoriya should’ve said no. So that he could’ve avoided sitting leaned back in Bakugo’s chair in his room, legs spread and a hand palming the bulge of his pants as he watched a nude Bakugo suck on your nipples. He squeezed both of your breasts in his hands, his tongue heavy on your nipples as they grew swollen like ripe fruits under the sun.

Midoriya bit his lip to hold back a soft moan. He continued to rub his bulge, his green eyes fixed on Bakugo’s back, arms, hands, all muscled and leveled like mountains. Bakugo was already in Midoriya’s head, sometimes staring at your face until it would change into his own. Imagining how it would be like if he were under Bakugo, getting his nipples sucked.

He saw that you had glanced at him and your face flushed deeply as you turned your face to the other side.

“What are you being all shy for?” Bakugo teased, knowing damn well that it was Midoriya’s presence making you like that.

“It’s just… you know,” your eyes fluttered between him and Midoriya. “A bit embarrassing but I’m happy. Thank you, Katsuki.”

It unsettled Midoriya when Bakugo smiled down at you, his words being next. “Anything for you, babe.”

Bakugo resumed licking and sucking on your nipples before traveling north to your collarbones and neck and then your lips. Midoriya was still stuck on what Bakugo said earlier. His words were almost like he was doing this all for you. Midoriya shouldn’t have expected anything but it hurt to know Bakugo’s true intentions. Bakugo wasn’t enjoying his presence. You were.

Regardless, Midoriya continued to watch because he was going to sink in as much as he could in his memory, from Bakugo’s face all the way down to his ass.

Midoriya slowly unbuttoned his pants and pulled down his zipper and slightly slid off his pants and boxers, his dick flinging up, already hard with precum leaking from its tip. You two weren’t even fucking and he was already this hard. He stroked around the head first, smearing the precum around it before he began slowly moving his hand up and down his shaft.

“Nnaah…!” He then jerked his head up when he heard a squeal from you and saw that Bakugo was fingering you, using one of his hands to keep him propped above your body while he had the fingers of his other hand deep in your cunt, pumping three digits in and out of you. Midoriya could hear the sound of your wetness squelching and swishing against the speed of his probing fingers. Each thrust had you trembling, gasping, your legs lifting in the air and widening. Bakugo was smirking, watching in pride as his fingers wrecked your abused hole.

Midoriya whined lowly, jerking his hips into his hand but not too harshly to where you two would take notice of him touching himself. Even though you told him it was okay to do so, he still found it embarrassing to be in this position. He wanted to be invisible despite you and Bakugo knowing he was there.

“Aah—Kat—Katsu—A-Aaah…!” Midoriya assumed you came because he saw your eyes rolling back and your entire body shuddering to the waves that traveled throughout your pelvis. Bakugo continued pumping his fingers even a little bit after your orgasm but he soon pulled them out and you opened your mouth when he brought his fingers coated in your slick close to your lips. You accepted them with a hum, your own flavor spreading amongst your taste buds as your tongue curled around his digits. He was pumping them softly in your mouth and Midoriya couldn’t help but imagine himself in your position although with his mouth full of Bakugo’s cock.

At this point, Midoriya didn’t care that he completely replaced you with himself in his mind. He was already delirious with pleasure that none of what he was doing seemed wrong anymore. He had a single goal in his mind and it was to get himself off to Bakugo.

He watched how Bakugo pulled you closer by your hips, a single hand on his cock as he stroked the length with its head pressed softly against the moist folds of your vagina.

“Tell me you want it, baby,” you shivered, feeling the head of his cock push around your entrance teasingly. You whined about the same time as Midoriya.

“You know I want it,” you clawed your thighs and rolled your hips. “Don’t tease me, Katsuki… not in front of him.”

“You know how it is. You want it, you beg for it, even in front of him.”

You bit your lip, glancing at Midoriya who was stroking his length, mouth parted, and freckled cheeks red. You let out a soft moan when you felt Bakugo pushing in, stopping when the tip was fully embedded in you.

“Come on,” he grunted, his nails digging into your hips when he grabbed them. “Tell me all about how much you want me to fuck you.”

You looked into his eyes, pleading, yet you knew all this teasing was making you even wetter. You had no choice but to give in to his demands.

“Please, Katsuki… ahn… I need you to fuck me—I can’t bear it anymore…”

“Yeah…? How bad do you want it?”

“So bad…”

“This bad?” He slammed the rest of his length in you and it made your back arch. He gave you a few more hard thrusts before he suddenly stopped. You whined loudly. Midoriya increased his stroke speed.

“Yes…!” You cried, fisting the sheets around you.

“Yeah?”

“Yes!!”

“Scream it!”

“Yes! Katsuki!” Your voice cracked.

“Louder!!” A slap came to your thigh.

“Yes!!! Yes!! Yes!! Yes!! Fuck me, Katsuuukii…!! Fuck—Yes—uhnnahh—aah—yes!!” The first ‘yes’ you screamed at the top of your lungs was enough to have Bakugo roughly fucking you into his bed and the rest of it was just praise. Midoriya swore his bed was moving with him, rocking back and forth to the speed of his own thrusts. His hips clapped against yours like thunder, making your flesh jiggle to the abuse, something that Midoriya thought looked painful at first but saw that your expression was far from it. You looked delirious, drowning in pleasure, heat, and desire, like every one of his fucks was driving you insane yet you wanted more of it. You craved for it, sang for it, cried for it. Those tears rolling down your cheeks was because of the overwhelming feeling within your core, and how Bakugo’s dick was hitting all the right places every single time and never once losing his rhythm.

Midoriya was moaning right with you, not even trying to hold them back anymore but he kept his moans of Bakugo’s name under his breath. He imagined Bakugo thrusting into him in that same speed, and although he has no clue how it would feel, he imagined it would feel just like what he’s feeling now, pleasure.

You squealed when Bakugo scooped you up in his arms and changed positions. He sat down at the edge of the bed and positioned you on his hips with his dick still fully sunken in. Your back was facing Midoriya and your body covered most of Bakugo but if Bakugo were to rest his head on your shoulder, Midoriya would see his face. And that’s exactly what he did.

Midoriya gulped when he saw those red eyes on him. Finally, after all this time, Bakugo acknowledged Midoriya’s presence and he hasn’t since he glared at him after Midoriya said yes to this entire affair. He was kissing you on your shoulder, very light kisses as if any harder would’ve break you into pieces yet the contrast of how rough you were slamming your hips on him proved that you were no fragile being.

Midoriya couldn’t read the look in Bakugo’s eyes, nor did he want to in fears that all it would be was a cruel taunt again. He was just happy that Bakugo was looking at him, just the simple fact that his mind was off you and on him, even if it was for all the wrong reasons. Midoriya looked into his eyes while touching himself, pretending he could see some softness in them. He felt himself getting closer to the edge, gasping, moaning, jerking his hips forward. You had just moaned Bakugo’s name and he could’ve sworn he was the one who had said it.

In his eyes, he was the one on top of Bakugo, grinding on him, feeling his dick pulsing within him as he looked into his crimson eyes and would see the lust in them. Yes. That was probably the look that he wanted to see in Bakugo’s eyes. A look that said he wanted him.

“Aa… Aaah… Katsu…”

As soon as Bakugo’s eyes returned to you, Midoriya felt sorrow. He watched as Bakugo kissed you, his eyes brightened as he gazed into your face. “Fuck, you’re beautiful…”

You smiled lightly when he said that, replying with your moans and more aggressive hip slamming. You were feeling the pleasure rise like heat bottled up in a container ready to be unleash and every fuck was landing you closer and closer until you felt something snap within you, and that pleasure came out in waves upon waves, trembling your body from within until it traveled out into your arms, legs, and hips. It was as if, to Midoriya, you became possessed by something and he had no doubt in his mind that he would be seeing the whites of your eyes if you were facing him.

“That’s my girl… sexy…” he spoke with husk, rich in lust that sent even more shivers down your spine. He looked in your eyes all cloyingly, it had Midoriya seeing envy, yet that entire moment still made him meet his own pleasurable end, and not because of the display of your orgasm but because Bakugo continued thrusting up into you regardless. Midoriya couldn’t stop the stutter of his hips as his cum shot out of him, landing on parts of his shirt and pants.

What he did not realize was during his orgasm he had mewled out Bakugo’s name. So, when he was done looking at the cum on his shirt, he looked at the two of you and nearly froze. You were both looking at him.

“What you calling my name for, Deku?” Bakugo sneered. Midoriya gulped. He looked at you and saw that your eyes were wide and mouth agape. It was possible that Bakugo didn’t tell you that Midoriya was getting off to him and not you. It would explain why you looked so surprised when you heard him whining out Bakugo’s name and it looked like Bakugo was feigning innocence on that knowledge. He was pretending to find out the same moment as you.

“A-Ah-Ah-I-I…” Midoriya stumbled on his words. He didn’t know what to say.

“So, you were thinking of Katsuki… makes sense,” you and Bakugo gave each other a look that Midoriya had no idea what it meant but he was practically shaking in his disheveled pants. He wanted to leave already. He felt embarrassed enough as it is.

“How about we change the rules, Deku?” Every time Bakugo said his name, he always put so much emphasis on it, like he wanted him to know he was insulting him. He watched as you slowly lifted yourself off of Bakugo, moaning softly before you sat in the empty space next to him and leaned against him. Bakugo’s cock was still standing tall, coating with slick and your discharge. He was smirking as he looked at Midoriya. Clearly, he was planning something. “I’ll make your day. Finish me off.”

“Eh?” Midoriya blinked and watched how Bakugo gestured to his erect penis.

“Suck me off.”

“S-Suck…” Immediately, Midoriya’s face flushed in a bright red. He couldn’t believe what Bakugo was suggesting. He wanted him to give him a blow job?

You suddenly left Bakugo’s side and prance towards Midoriya. It startled him suddenly seeing a nude body in front of him and you grabbed his hand and led him closer to Bakugo with a smile. “You don’t want to?” You asked innocently yet proceeded to loosen his tie and pull it from his neck. His school collared shirt was next and then his pants that fell to his ankles. It was happening so fast for Midoriya that he was still trying to process what Bakugo wanted him to do.

He found himself leaned down in front of Bakugo with you on his right and a penis in his face.

“Have you ever done this?” Midoriya didn’t answer you but looked down and you smiled lightly, chuckling as you gave Bakugo’s penis a small stroke in your hand. “I’ll teach you.”

Midoriya watched as you slowly submerged Bakugo’s dick in your mouth. He could see the outline of it through your cheeks until your lips nearly reached the base, blonde pubic hair so frizzy it tickled your upper lip. He heard a groan from Bakugo and then saw his hand behind your head, caressing and ruffling your hair with his fingers, praising you for how well you were doing. You bobbed your head only a few times before pulling away. A bridge of saliva between your lips and the head was what connected you. Bakugo’s hand on your head moved down to your cheek and his thumb wiped the saliva off, destroying the bridge.

“It’s easy!” You smiled before returning to sit with Bakugo on the bed and hugged his arm.

“Just hurry the fuck up,” Bakugo grumbled and Midoriya gulped, eyeing his erect penis just inches away from his mouth.

What the hell was happening? At first, you and Bakugo wanted him to watch you two have sex but now they wanted him to suck Bakugo’s dick? Midoriya didn’t know whether to feel happy about all the attention Bakugo is giving him or to feel terrible that probably the only reason why he would allow that was because you probably got off of it.

But Midoriya wanted to feel hopeful. Perhaps Bakugo was harboring similar feelings as him but he was afraid to express them. Besides he already came this far.

Midoriya wrapped his scarred fingers around Bakugo’s cock, stroking it before he sunk his mouth on his length. He would never forget the heated salt with a tinge of sweetness upon his tongue. The taste was burned into his mind and he would never forget Bakugo’s flavor. He heard Bakugo hum and he swore he felt the vibrations all the way to the dick in his mouth. It took a few bobs for Midoriya to grow confident and moved his head as fast as he could, nearly gagging when the head would touch the back of his throat.

Bakugo was breathing through his gritted teeth and you watched in awe at the both of them. Already, you felt the wetness between your legs.

“Filthy fucking Deku,” Bakugo moaned and gripped the front of his hair. The entirety of his forehead was shown as he continued to suck on Bakugo’s cock. “Look at you… on your knees, all over my dick,” Bakugo shook Midoriya’s head by the grip of his hair, “didn’t think you’ll ever get to do this, huh? Sucking the dick of the future number one hero. Next… you’ll be having posters of me up in your room, beating your meat to them…”

Now those words had struck a chord in Midoriya. He immediately left his dick but Bakugo still had a hold of his hair. The next pull had Bakugo’s dick pushing against his cheek and smearing his pre-cum and saliva on his freckles. Bakugo found his green eyes on him looking hard and a shaky smirk that said he was afraid but couldn’t bear to hold back his words.

“What are… you talking about? Shouldn’t you be happy, Kacchan…? Future number two hero getting his dick sucked by the future number one? Then you’ll be the one fantasizing about me.”

You laughed a little too loud and Bakugo let out a growl. He pulled on his hair and Midoriya winced, gritting his teeth. Strangely, he was enjoying every second of this.

“You better watch your damn mouth. We all fucking know who’s gonna be number one!” He suddenly stood up and grabbed Midoriya’s head between his hands. “And it’s not gonna be some fucking nerd sucking on my dick!” He pushed his dick against his lips and forced them to separate for the girth and length that raided his mouth at a speed that had Midoriya shrieking.

Bakugo roughly fucked his face without any remorse. Midoriya clawed at his legs, red scratch marks developed around his thighs. He blinked at the tears hanging around the edge of his eyes. They rolled down his cheeks endlessly as he gagged, grunted, and groaned whenever Bakugo’s dick slammed back into his mouth. It was hard to breathe even through his nose and no matter what Bakugo wouldn’t give him a break. Then he roughly thrusted his hips in and stayed there, the tip of his dick pushing against the back of Midoriya’s throat and he started to whine. Any longer and he would empty his stomach.

“Can’t say much when you’re choking!” Bakugo gave a sadistic smile that sent both shivers down your spine and Midoriya’s. He ripped Midoriya off and he fell on his back coughing, saliva running down from his mouth and mixing with the tears on his cheeks. Bakugo climbed on top of him, knees between Midoriya’s head and without any delay, thrusted his dick back in his mouth. At this point, Midoriya was sure he was going to die. He regretted that sassy remark.

Bakugo fucked his mouth hard, using gravity to slam his hips back down when he lifted them up. Midoriya screamed every time he did it, his screams, of course, muffled because his mouth was full. The force so severe that his head would bounce against the floor.

“Diiiiiiiiiiie!!” His hips moved wildly, his breathing became gravelly, grunts loud as if he was a frightening beast. An alarm was going off in Midoriya’s head. Bakugo was going to cum any second now. He was going to cum… and he would have to swallow it all up. Fear flashed in his eyes because of the unknown. He didn’t know what to expect, but he also didn’t have a choice in the matter. It was coming regardless, and he would have to brace for whatever Bakugo was giving him.

He braced for the next few sloppy thrusts until he felt his dick throb against his tongue and he immediately tasted the bitter, sticky cum go down his throat and the last couple of spurts was to his face, all over his forehead, cheeks, and lips.

Bakugo stoked his penis until none came out and a proud smirk was on his face when he looked at Midoriya and saw what he had done to him. Midoriya’s entire face was dirtied with cum and flushed red, his lips and the area around his lips were even more pigmented because of the abuse it went through. He was trying to catch his breath and his eyes were off to the side, consciously avoiding Bakugo in front of him. He was still contemplating if this was real, leaning towards the side of it not being and suddenly waking up in his bed; safe and sound.

“You’re fucking gross, Deku.” He then heard Bakugo’s comment. He was sneering at his penis that stood tall and hard after all that. Honestly, Midoriya wanted to agree with him.

“That was so hot…” you moaned. Midoriya noticed you were touching yourself. “You should fuck him.” Midoriya looked back at Bakugo. Red eyes stared him down. Was he… Was he considering it…? Oh no. Oh no. no. no. Midoriya couldn’t do this. He already went too far down the hole, any deeper and he would get burned by the earth’s core. He had to leave.

Midoriya rolled himself onto his knees, “I-I should—”

“Hey nerd! You’re a virgin, right?” No. no. no. no. no. Midoriya couldn’t do this to himself. If he leaves here after being thoroughly fucked by his childhood friend—his crush, a person he can’t even have and is probably only doing this because of the amusement of his girlfriend, it would absolutely wreck him. Even if it’s his dream, his fantasy, his desire, he had to fight the urge to spread his legs for him. There was nothing to come from this but heartache and disgust all for a few minutes of imagining Bakugo was fucking him because he loved him.

“I’ll take that silence as a yes.”

Midoriya shook his head as he stood up. He hated the fact that he was hard because it made his next words unbelievable.

“I don’t want to.”

Katsuki glared at him. You began to pout.

“Why the fuck not? Weren’t you liking this? You’re saying that, but your dick is saying something else.”

“Doesn’t matter, Kacchan. I don’t want to do this. You guys had your fun. I was just supposed to watch anyway.”

“I thought you liked me—watching me fuck my own girlfriend and screaming my name when you’re cumming. Isn’t this your chance to finally have me?” This wasn’t having him, and he knew that.

“Please, Midoriya. This is the last thing and then you can go home.” Midoriya couldn’t believe you were begging him. He gave you a look of disbelief. You were actually that desperate to see your boyfriend fuck another man, not even caring if said man gets emotionally damage because of it. Midoriya knew he had all the power in this situation.

Which is why he would probably hate himself even more for doing this.

Midoriya marched in front of Bakugo, looking up into his red eyes. He gave a firm, “fine,” and then Bakugo smirked, hands reaching forward to stroke his erect penis but Midoriya stopped him. “But I don’t want you to fuck me. I want you to make love to me.”

Immediately, that smirk dropped and Midoriya continued to speak as he looked away from him. “Make love to me… treat me like a lover… that’s all I want, Kacchan.” His name felt heavy in his mouth. He was practically admitting his feelings for him and it was making him sick to his stomach. He wished it was a different time, a different place, perhaps, even a different universe. Somewhere in a weird timeline where you didn’t exist, and he was with Bakugo. It’s not like he hated you but… he just really wished he was in your position.

Bakugo looked genuinely surprised. His eyes wide and his mouth stayed in that usual “O” shape whenever he was baffled. He looked to you for an answer and you shrugged.

“It’s whatever you want,” you said, before a smile grew on your face.

Bakugo turned back to Midoriya, giving him a small look Midoriya couldn’t read before muttering, “fine.”

And then he found Bakugo’s large hand wrapped around his length. His cheeks grew hot and his first reaction was to step back but Bakugo easily closed the gap by swiftly claiming his lips. A ‘mmhp!’ leaving Midoriya after.

But as quick as he was surprised was as quick as he melted against his body. Midoriya grabbed onto his muscular arm and kissed him back, shutting his eyes, pushing and moving his lips against his as he felt Bakugo stroke his cock. Noses bumping into each other and pressed against each other’s cheeks. Humming at how sweet it felt to finally have his lips. Perhaps he should have never agreed because now it would be hard to live without this.

But gosh, he wanted this for so long. In his dreams, in his imaginative world—he wanted this.

Soon, Midoriya’s feet lifted off the ground, his legs wrapped around Bakugo’s waist and large hands cupped his ass. Bakugo easily carried him to his bed and he laid him down and climbed on top of him, lips still locked, hands roaming over mountains of muscles.

You laid down next to Midoriya for a better view, licking your lips as you looked between Midoriya and Bakugo. You soon reached for the drawer next to the bed and pulled out a bottle and a rectangular box. You left the bottle near Bakugo, but you kept the box close to you.

Bakugo lifted his upper half and Midoriya stared up at him with his forever blush and hazy eyes. His eyes wandered around his chest and shoulders, watching his muscles contract and expand when he reached for the bottle. He couldn’t believe this was happening. It was surreal seeing Bakugo on top of him as he spread his legs for him, how he fit perfectly between them—more perfectly than between yours—he wanted to imagine.

“Kacchan, I… I never did this before,” Midoriya whispered.

Bakugo scoffed, “I know, nerd.” He then opened the bottle and started coating his fingers with lube and tossed the bottle on the bed.

“Widen your legs,” Bakugo told him and he complied. Midoriya was already quite flexible from all the training exercises, squats, and stretches he does. It was nothing too difficult for him physically but emotionally, it was different. There was still something in the back of his mind telling him to run, to call everything off, put on his clothes, and high tail it out of there. But his horniness was strong, and it was telling him to lay there, hold his legs open, and get thoroughly fucked. Gosh, he thought he was smarter than this.

“You’ll love it.” Midoriya heard you say. He wished you would stay quiet.

He then felt something rimming his asshole and soon realized it was Bakugo’s fingers. One digit slipped in and all Midoriya felt was discomfort. You saw it in his eyebrows that knitted together and his hold on the pillow tightened. It felt like Bakugo’s fingers were searching for something, probing in different directions.

“You’re fucking tight,” Bakugo commented breathlessly.

He wondered how he must’ve look to him—Legs spread, cock erect and dripping from the tip, his hole turning red from his probing, lips parted for his uneven breath still red from the abuse it suffered from his cock. He wondered if how he looked was getting Bakugo off. If it was him or the fact that you were stroking his dick—once again, you were getting in the way.

“Mmpm…!” Midoriya bit his lip, suppressing a moan when he felt his insides spread for two more digits. He fisted the sheets under him because of the throbbing pain as Bakugo’s fingers moved in and out of him in a slow, steady pace. It didn’t feel good at all, but strangely he wanted to stay, thinking that any moment now pleasure would spring up.

And it did, around his shaft when Bakugo grasped his length, thumb rubbing at the head, fingers of his other hand still pumping in his hole. It was a whole lot of nothing but at least Bakugo’s hands on his dick felt good.

It wasn’t long until Bakugo’s fingers abandoned his hole and Midoriya watched as he coated his dick with lube.

“Kacchan…” he wasn’t sure why he spoke his name, but it made Bakugo look at him. Surely, by the look in his eyes, it meant that he wanted him, right? Or was it just his carnal instincts begging to find some release that he would accept any hole presented in front of him? He didn’t know. And the pent-up pleasure he felt within him made him not care anymore. His head felt fuzzy from the accumulating heat in his body. He was hot to the touch, and he bet Bakugo could feel it under his fingertips when he grabbed his hips tightly, fingerprints indented his skin.

The first thing he heard was him releasing a gasp and he saw him gritting his teeth. The second thing, he felt something nudging by his hole—something that was a much greater size than his entrance. He questioned if it would fit. A question he’s heard from so many scenarios in porn or accidental eavesdropping that he didn’t quite understand until he had experienced it. Would it fit?

He froze in anticipation. Any doubt that was creeping in the back of his mind was too late to convince him. He was here to see this to the end.

“A-Aah…!” P-Pain! Midoriya slapped his hands over his mouth, alarmed at his voice for reaching such an abnormal height. And he couldn’t muffle the next when Bakugo thrusted his hips forward, his toes curled tightly in the air, eyes blurred with tears from the pain. His mind immediately blanked as all he could focus on was the feeling of Bakugo moving in and out of him—and that stabbing pain, like his insides were being torn from Bakugo’s length and girth.

“Didn’t know you had a voice in you, Deku...” Midoriya heard his growl in his ear when Bakugo moved completely on top of him, his hips shifted up and his dick was being pressed between his and Bakugo’s abs, indirectly stroked every time Bakugo bucked his hips.

“Still fucking tight... even after all those fingers fucking you.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have agreed to this, but it was much too late.

He wanted to tell him to slow down but his dick angled in a way that hit his prostrate and an explosion of pleasure overwhelmed the pain, blow after blow had made him lost his mind.

“Aah! Hah… W-Wai..t… Kaccha—ahn!” Fuck, it was good—so so so good. He was clawing at his shoulders, splitting his skin and drawing blood. He heard his butt cheeks singing to his thrusts, a sound that echoed in his ears and heart, and matched with his loose moans and pants—he sounded so unfamiliar, so loud, he was surprised Bakugo wasn’t telling him to shut up.

Maybe he liked it.

He wanted to believe that was the case.

Bakugo’s room was quiet. At least it was to Midoriya. For the first time today, he forgotten your existence. He didn’t notice how you were watching them with hazy eyes or how you were fucking yourself with a dildo. The sounds of your moans were being drowned by the watchful vermillion eyes hovering above him and immense pleasure of his lower half. He couldn’t tear his emerald irises away from the blaring red. A hue he knew all his life.

“Ahn… Please…”

“Heh… you begging me?” Bakugo’s head dip and his lips brushed against his earlobe. His husky voice ran shivers throughout his body.

“Please…”

“Say my name, you know which one.” Bakugo grabbed his chin. “Tell me what you want.”

“Ka—cchan…”

Bakugo growled, and bucked his hips harshly, the deepest moan escaped Midoriya. “Tell me.”

“Kacchan… please… I—I…” Midoriya blushed, “More… I need more…”

That dark chuckle from Bakugo had made Midoriya’s heart flutter and when he began rocking his hips, Midoriya held on to him like his life depended on it. The bed shifted with their moving bodies, squeaking under the weight of two men making love. Moans and groans left their lips, evidence of their pleasure that could not be contained. Midoriya couldn’t believe he was making Bakugo sound this way. He was relieved that he felt good—that he was making Bakugo look as if this was the greatest feeling in the world. He was giving that to him.

Midoriya wrapped his legs around Bakugo, driving Bakugo deeper in his ass, drawing another deep moan from him.

“Kacchan… Kacchan… Ahn… M-More…” He felt Bakugo’s lips on his neck, wet with warm nibbles on his skin, no doubt leaving behind red blemishes. Bakugo was moving freely in and out of him now, the lube making it easier and easier the faster he went.

Midoriya didn’t hide his disappointment when Bakugo suddenly sat up and made his legs unravel around him, but it quickly left when he continuously thrusted into him with one hand on his hip and the other wrapped around his cock. Bakugo was working to get him off. He could tell by how his frequent moans were and the creases between his blond brows that he was almost close. He looked exactly how he looked when he came inside you that day in the classroom. Such a handsome face despite how scrunched up his expression was. He imagined many nights about that look and here he had a front row view, better yet, he was the one causing it.

“Oh… I-I’m cumming…!” Midoriya’s cum was already spurting from his cock before he let out those words. His back arched off the bed and Bakugo’s name spewed from him like it was the one word he knew how to say. Eyes rolling as Bakugo continue to slam into his prostrate. His body spasmed like the earth was quaking under him. The bed’s springs creaked from the force.

“D-Deku…” Bakugo gritted his teeth, his fingertips pressed into his hips until his skin bruised red. His pace was brutal, his grunts aggressively getting louder and louder until finally he spilled his seed in Midoriya.

Midoriya felt himself become full to the brim. It was an entirely new feeling that rushed through his nerves like he was lying upon the sand and a pleasant wave had washed his body and receded. He felt light as if he was floating in the air, yet his limbs felt heavy like he had just finished training. Everything sounded meshed together, a jumble of words and moans from who he could not pin a name to at the moment. He didn’t even realize his eyes were closed until he opened them and saw you and Bakugo beside him, Bakugo pumping a vibrating dildo in your hole and you shuddering in orgasm.

It was at that moment when he felt himself growing cold and the realization of what just happened hit him like a bucket of ice water.

He watched as you two collapsed together, enveloping in each other’s arms. Tired, Bakugo kissed you softly on your lips and he heard you give a small thanks before telling him you loved him.

And Midoriya’s heart sunk when he heard Bakugo say it back. It was like you two were in your own little world, snuggling together with body heat as if Midoriya wasn’t present.

Midoriya knew he made a grave mistake.

All of his logic came back to him once the veil of pleasure was lifted and embarrassment, sadness, guilt, and maybe even a bit of anger came over him. He was a fool to think there was something more to this—he was a fool to even agree to this. What did he expect when he came between two people already in love, there was no more love left to give—especially to him. To Bakugo, Midoriya wasn’t a childhood friend. He was just someone he knew as a child.

And Midoriya could never be that person you are to him.

Midoriya rolled himself off the bed. He felt the throbbing tenderness of his backside. He knew soreness would come to him in the morning. He quickly gathered his clothes from the ground, put them on, and left. Neither you or Bakugo gave him a single glance.

He had never rushed home so fast before. He was home in minutes, rushing up the apartment stairs, unlocking his door and escaping to his room. His concerned mother watched him run to his room and asked him what was wrong. Of course, she received no answer in return. He couldn’t bear to show his face to her right now.

He sat on his bed, surrounded by the images and figurines of his idol, All Might. Every single one of them staring at him like they knew what he just did, judging him just like they did whenever he would masturbate to Bakugo. He felt sick being surrounded by them, the very image of All Might reminding him of the past he shared with the one he loved. A love that he would never obtain.

Midoriya hunched forward, arms wrapped over his stomach. He felt nausea settling in, his bowels growled as they churned, and a dull pain appeared. Midoriya rushed himself to the bathroom and immediately went to the toilet. As soon as he sat, all of Bakugo’s cum that had shot up into him came back out. He felt sick—utterly sick.

“Izuku, are you alright?” His mother lightly tapped on the door. Midoriya gasped, but he knew she wouldn’t come in.

“I… um—yeah,” he felt his throat closing up. He swallowed the pit deep within it, wishing he could swallow the tears building in his eyes. “I think I ate something bad…”

“Oh no, I’ll fix something up to soothe your stomach, okay?”

He heard her walk away. He hoped his voice didn’t sound hoarse from all the moaning and now the crying. He couldn’t shake the tears away as they trickled down to his lap. Regret would’ve been the word to describe how Midoriya was feeling and that was the least emotion he wanted to feel. He knew what he agreed to, but within him, there was a very very small hope that, perhaps, Bakugo did feel what he felt—that there was more between them than childhood friends or heroes-to-be.

But what happened in Bakugo’s house just solidify that it was nothing more than his imagination. To just leave him after taking his virginity and pretend he was no longer in the room made it clear that he was playing with his emotions just for the sake of pleasing his girlfriend. And as much as he wanted to be angry at him, he couldn’t. That anger was directed at himself for falling for it—for feeding into his desires. The smartest thing to do was forget this ever happened and focus on becoming the hero he wanted to be. It was what he knew best, obsessing over heroes not love.

Within his hand, he felt a buzz. It came from his phone that he forgot he brought with him.

There were a few missed texts over the hours. Some from Todoroki, Iida and Ochako. But the one that caught Midoriya’s attention was the recent text from Bakugo. That pit in his throat reappeared and no matter how many times he swallowed, it wouldn’t go away. He started feeling sick again—just as another pile of cum dropped into the toilet—but it was all for a different reason.

lmk if you want to join again

Those words burned into his skull. He squeezed the phone in his hands until it trembled. He couldn’t believe he was hesitating right now. Another chance…

“Fuck…”

He slowly typed his reply and sent it. He heard the toilet bowl make another splash.

----------

Taglist:

@officialvanitype @bakasbitch18 @scftmilki @jelly-bean8383-blog

#bnha #bnha x reader #mha x reader #mha #boku no hero academia #bakugo x reader x midoriya #bakugo x reader #bakugo katsuki #bakudeku #bakudeku x reader #my hero academia #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero academia x reader #bnha fanfiction #fanfiction

437 notes · View notes

quirklessidiot · 4 years ago

Text

Title: blood son [oneshot; filthy rich sequel] Pairing: millionare!sakusa kiyoomi x y/n [filthy capitalist au ft. kageyama tobio as your son] Genre: major angst ahead, thriller, yandere!au-ish

Synopsis: A full circle of madness finally comes to an end.

Warnings: sexual themes, rape, yandere behaviorisms (just some obsessive and disturbing stuff), very dark themes, anxiety, trauma, depression, eating disorder, unwanted pregnancy/children (y/n hates her kid here), suicide, gaslighting, and Y/N’s decent to madness

Notes: happy 800 due to a lot of uh people asking for a short sequel, here it is...for better understanding, please read filthy rich skskksks anyways onto the story…i cant write smut for shit sIKE also fuck men and women like this, if you see them chok’em and chunk’em in the basin. yes tobio is ur bby boy here idk kageyama and sakusa have the same energy i just couldnt resist i swear sksks

Filthy rich // series masterlist

A moan escapes your lips when you feel the hot liquid fill your hole, your expression is tantalizing and completely erotic. Something that he can’t seem to stop looking at, your body that was now a canvas of his marks, was a reminder that no one could have you.

You're oblivious to it all, the things he did. The things he wanted to do to you, the dark thoughts, you were like a small rabbit in the den of a large wolf. Completely trusting, completely dumb and he’s taking advantage of it.

He stuffs and fills you up with his seed so that you’ll never leave him.

He wants to breed you.

Your belly swelling with his children.

It was definitely a dream come true.

Your eyes snap back to reality as the bus stops in front of the new town, you had moved towns earlier since the town started to become a tourist destination. The idea of staying there would be too risky despite having the alias of Kageyama Miwa. You were still in hiding and you feared to even open the news despite it being eight years since you ran away.

“Okaasan, are we going to go down now?” a small voice asks.

You turn to find his son staring right at you, it had been a cruel reminder for him to look a lot like his father. You knew that he didn’t have any part in this, he was a victim just like you but you couldn’t help but be distant and not-so affectionate.

This was his kid.

His blood.

You couldn’t help but shrivel away.

“...Okaasan will just take her duffel bag on the overhead, just wait right behind me.” You say quietly. Tobio was a good boy, he was quiet and obedient. If the circumstances had been different, you’d adore him but every time you looked at him, all you saw was his wretched father and the unnamed things he did in the name of ‘love’.

To be honest, you didn’t know what else Sakusa did aside from trying to get you pregnant and holding you back from leaving.

You didn’t even want to try to find out. If he was willing to go through such lengths to have you stay, it was more than enough reason to run away. You held onto your child’s hands as you made your way to your new home, it was smaller than the last one but this was alright.

It was clean and livable.

Tobio stays at the side, out of your way as you begin to fix up the house. The young boy isn’t social for his age towards his peers and you should be worried yet you can’t bring yourself to be, “Okaasan’s going to go to the grocery store, would you like anything?” you ask.

“Milk.”

“Alright, just stay here okay?”

He meekly nods as you awkwardly pat his head and tie your roughly chopped hair in a tight ponytail, over the course of eight years, time has not been kind to you. You had grown unhealthily thin, probably lost some hair due to stress, and the bags underneath your eyes due to the lack of good sleep was evident.

You tell yourself that he isn’t looking for you now.

That he probably found a new plaything but you couldn’t help but look behind your shoulder every time. You didn’t even expect to get this far away, last you heard whilst you were at the station towards the last town eight years ago, you were being searched up and down by the police all over Tokyo.

You really thought you’d be found out and you feared for the worse but the farther you went, the less news reports you saw.

They probably thought you had died.

Which was good on your part that time because you’d rather be dead in a ditch than be caught up with a man like him again.

“...-Kusa Kiyoomi is expected to marry the daughter of Akiko Corp soon…”

You tense up at the mention of the very familiar name as you pass by the appliance store, shakily you turn to the tv screen to find a video of Sakusa Kiyoomi with a woman who had the same hair color as yours. Everything around you is muted now as his cold gaze fills the tv screen, your heart is thumping quick.

He isn’t here.

“...It’s quite the love story of the century, don’t you think? After the disappearance of Kiyoomi’s beloved eight years ago, he met her a few years back and he seems to be doing well.” The tv anchor smiles on the screen as she talks to her co-host but inside you were shaking, what did happen to your missing person report? Curiosity starts to gnaw your insides as you head to the internet café before going to the grocery store.

You didn’t have the guts to look then but after seeing that report, you pull up on the secluded part of the internet café and search up your case. Your mouth dries up, the search was still on-going much to your surprise. There was even a website dedicated to it, “...Y/N L/N might be suffering from hysteria and psychological problems, please contact us immediately when you see her.”

Your eyes narrowed at the report as you shakily cup your mouth and choke back a laugh, that bastard really had the audacity to diagnose you with that when he was the one sick to the head.

Once again, the bile on your throat starts to pile up.

It still wasn’t safe.

You’d probably live your whole life on the run.

On the run with his son that scarily resembled him, how fucking cruel.

Sakusa Kiyoomi’s eyes glaze over the small town in discontent, apparently his bride-to-be wanted to get married here and who was he to refuse? All he wanted to do was get this over with so her father can shut up.

“Kiyoomi-san.” a small dainty voice calls out, he turns to his side to find (h/c) staring right at him. Akiko Hideyo is the daughter of one of the most powerful businessmen in Tokyo, he met her at a function a few years ago.

The very first time he saw her was from behind, it was a rather scary resemblance that he had to stop himself from approaching her by calling your name yet when he started to talk to her and hear her dainty voice, he realizes that she’s not even like you at all.

She was gentle and dainty like a deer.

Albeit his little bunny was gentle when they got together sometimes, he always recalled how you were filled with spunk. How you weren’t even afraid to put him in his place and how you were all over the place but seem to look beautiful whilst doing so.

He always recalled wanting to control you yet you never seem to succumb to it.

It had been eleven years since you first met, eight years since you had disappeared without a single trace and Sakusa is stuck with some third-rate look alike for relief. Every time they fucked, it was always from behind. Hideyo thinks it’s just his preference but in reality, it was because her back had such strong resemblance to you and he’d imagine every time that it was you.

He misses the roughness, the high, the erotica.

The only things you could provide.

It was never enough, it was only you, you, and you.

“...Have you decided what flavor you wanted? Komori-san mentioned that you liked vanilla.” his fiancé meekly says.

Hideyo was boring.

Sometimes he wonders if he’s just doing this because he has never seen someone closely resembling you, “Anything would be fine.” He replied in a clipped tone. As the car comes to a halt for a moment because of a large truck backing from a driveway, his attention shifted towards a young boy bouncing a volleyball against the pavement outside his window. There are scratches on his knee cap yet the boy had a blank look on his face, he was sort of reminded of himself when he was younger.

As he was about to look away, he sees a woman approach the young boy and bends down to his level to check the scratches.

The woman’s small figure isn’t even the least bit familiar yet his attention can’t seem to go away. He watches her tuck the strand of stray hair and he finally gets a good look and it feels like the world stops turning at how the woman scarily resembles you. Albeit the figure was smaller and the hair was another color and unevenly chopped short.

It was no mistake.

“Y/N.” He mumbles yet as he’s about to open the door, the car starts to move. Kiyoomi’s fist tightens as he uncharacteristically yells at the driver to stop the car, Hideyo jumps on the seat and before she could say anything else, the business mongrel is out of the car, running to where you stood.

Yet just like a ghost, you were gone and so was the little boy who had oddly resembled him.

These days you had even a harder time sleeping. Maybe it was because there was a little leak on the ceiling, or better yet, maybe it was because the heater wasn’t working, or maybe it was because you were at a new place which made it harder to adjust.

You sat at the side with your expense book on hand, your gaze on his son who was peacefully asleep. Tobio was growing older soon and he needed to settle down at one place for high school and college. A part of yourself ventured deep and dark in your mind, the thought of leaving him at an orphanage seemed better now.

He had a fake last name anyways, the bastard wouldn’t be able to find him.

You’d be doing this boy a favor since you never saw him as your kid and he’d be away from his very messy world.

Your thoughts are immediately disrupted when you hear a brief knock on the door. This made you tense up, it was late, Why would there be a need for visitors? Your son is quick to be awoken by the second knock and you immediately press your hand on his mouth and while your other finger is on your lips to signal him to keep quiet.

Another knock.

Tobio looks worried, it wasn’t his first time to see an episode from you but this time, something feels different. You're shaking more and you look like you’re about to pass out any moment. “Stay quiet.” you mouth as you crawl towards the door and press your ear on it to confirm who was on the other side, too afraid to even take a peak on the window.

Silence.

The only sound that could be heard was your thumping heart, Tobio had voluntarily placed a hand on his mouth to keep himself quiet.

Another knock.

You shut your eyes tight, praying to whatever god out there for this person to leave.

“...I don’t think anyone lives here.” You hear someone say on the other side, the voice sounded so familiar but you just couldn’t pinpoint who it was, this wasn’t Sakusa for sure, “Are you sure that the information was right?”

Silence again.

“Hm.” The person hummed, knocking again, “Well, this place seems like a dead end. The landlady said that she’s not familiar with the tenants here so we could be wrong…”

The voice started to decrease and you feel yourself slowly starting to breathe easier. Tobio slowly put down his hand and there you saw it, the fear on his eyes. You breathe in and out, calming yourself, this place isn't safe anymore, “Tobio, take your bags. We’re leaving.” you only say.

You don’t even hesitate to leave despite it being the middle of the night.

Tobio is right in front of you as you go down your small apartment and you think everything is well, you really do yet luck didn’t seem to be on your side that night.

“...Y/N?”

A dreadfully familiar voice calls out, didn’t they leave? Why? why was he here?

“O-Okaasan.” Tobio mumbles, grabbing your hand and hiding behind you.

Your head hurts, you wanted to just be selfish and leave Tobio here with this man, his father, the wretched, vile creature who had betrayed you. You wanted to run.

You didn’t feel safe.

Sakusa Kiyoomi didn’t make you feel safe.

“Y/N…” He repeats, slowly approaching you, “It’s me, bunny.”

Oh, how you hated that pet name. It sounded like you were his plaything, like you could never escape from his set-up. Before you could say anything else, he invades your personal space once again and envelopes you in a very,very tight hug.

“I’ve missed you so, so much.” He whispers on your ear and your shivering, not from pleasure but from fear, “Shh, it’s alright. I found you. It must’ve been hard to be alone out here.”

Get away.

“Get the fuck away from me.” You yell, pushing him off of you as you stagger away from him. Tobio remains behind you, completely shaking.

“Now, Y/N-” he tries to shush you, “We should go home now, you’ve spent so much time away from me but I understand, you were probably just scared to tell me you were pregnant, right?”

He cups the right side of your face and places a chaste kiss on your temple, tears are threatening to spill as you realize that this was all over. You couldn’t escape now, this lunatic wouldn’t let you have at it.

The soft and plush bed is completely foreign to your back, Kiyoomi had you separated from Tobio because apparently you were still too ‘unstable’. It made you mentally scoff, between the both of you, he was the unstable one.

You wondered if they started to feed the small boy lies about you, Kiyoomi definitely milked it out to the press for sure. When he had found you, not only were your friends and family in a frenzy, the media was having a field day too. He had broken off the engagement and he used your ‘mental illness’ card on them and it worked.

Another story was weaved on papers, a love that transcended through time.

You let out a low sardonic laugh.

Mental Illness, you wondered if this could be a ploy for a suicide. After all, you’d rather be face first on the pavement than stay here with a son about to be fed on lies and a crazy bastard who sleeps next to you at night.

You stare out your window, the curtains were drawn as you looked at the free birds.

How envious.

“Y/N?” Kiyoomi comes in, a food tray in hand, “It’s time for dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Y/N it’s been two days, all you ate was an apple-”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Y/N, our son-”

“He was never my son.” You harshly snapback, your voice sharp, “He’s yours through and through, a fucking incarnate of you and a curse. He’s not mine. He never will be.”

You suddenly feel the presence of the small boy behind the door and there stands his boy, staring right at your eyes yet you feel nothing for him. You never felt anything for him. The moment they placed him on your arms to nurse, there was no joy nor light.

All he brought was a painful reminder.

Kiyoomi places the tray to the side and closes the door behind him, Tobio’s blank gaze still on you, “...Those aren’t words a child is supposed to hear, Y/N. Especially ours…” he inches closer and you clench your fist tightly and he places his hand on your neck and lightly holds it.

You aren’t scared of him anymore, the nicest thing this guy could do was kill you, really.

“Maybe we should have a girl this time, hm?” his hand trails upwards to softly caress the side of your face.

You’re immediately frozen by his sudden choice of words, no, no-

“Maybe you’ll learn to love Tobio even more when you’re pregnant with another of mine-” before he could finish what he was about to say, you raise a hand and slap him right at his face, it must’ve been hard since it left a mark, “Ah, Y/N. I didn’t know you still liked it rough-”

“D-Don’t, I-I can’t get pregnant.” You're shaking this time as you try to come up with a lie, “I-I can’t…”

“Oh?” He tilts his head, “Why not?”

“I’ll die.” You lied, “When I had Tobio I almost died, my body couldn’t handle it. T-The doctor had said that if I were to have another, I’d die…”

The lie didn’t save you that moment, really. He has become an expert at detecting your lies so instead of a reply, he harshly places his lips on yours and despite protests, he just pins you down.

He’s harsh on you that night, spilling and stuffing you with his cum, whispering that you’ll have it all and that you’d be his everything but all you could do was let a small hiccup escape your lips as you tried to hold back your cries.

‘Someone, anyone, please.’ you pleaded internally.

You don’t see Tobio until a week later, the boy has grown a tad bit chubbier and is adorned with expensive clothes. Sakusa, on the other hand, has been force-feeding you to the point where you threw up right after meals (secretly, of course)

You sit down at the couch as your son blinks at you, “...I’m sorry.” He breaks the silence and you shut your eyes tight as you recalled the harsh words he heard last week.

“I’m sorry too, Tobio.” you could only reply because genuinely, you did feel like you went too far this time. He didn’t choose to be born, a part of you should’ve saved him the misery and left him at the orphanage that time, “Do you hate me?” you ask.

“No.”

“You should.” You say quietly, “You should hate your otosan too.”

Tobio remains quiet at your words.

“When you grow older, don’t end up like him. don’t end up like us. forget us when you have the chance.”

“Okay.”

“Promise me.”

“I promise.”

“Good and If you ever get the chance to leave, promise me that you get out and don’t look back.”

Tobio may have been eight years old that time but he knows fear when he sees it and he knows promises aren’t meant to be broken. He remembers those words well because it was the last long conversation he has with you.

The month of December rolls by and it’s cold, you’ve given up fighting back at this point. Your glassy eyes are directed to the window, not even wanting to look down at your bulging stomach. Kiyoomi doesn’t even need to tell you twice to not leave the house, you decide upon yourself to just stay at your room on bed the whole time.

You wonder, just how high is it from up here? Would it hurt?

“Y/N?” a dreadful voice calls out.

“Hm.”

“You haven’t gone out of our room in two months. You haven’t even seen Tobio.” Sakusa points out, you were like a obedient doll now. So lifeless, so still, you wished he’d discard you already.

“I might say something again, I don’t want to bother.” You replied truthfully, gaze still avoiding his.

The raven-haired man starts to caress your plump face, you had grown chubbier since the beginning of your pregnancy, he couldn’t be anymore happier to finally be there for you.

This was perfect.

You were finally his.

You weren’t letting go.

“...Don’t you ever regret it?” You finally ask, turning to him, your blank eyes staring at his rather deranged ones, the eyes that you once loved was now just a reminder of your resentful life.

“Which one?” He asks, inching in closer to kiss your neck, your collarbone. You let out a meek sigh as you shut your eyes and internally prayed for this to be over quickly as he removes your ribbon that held your flimsy nightgown together.

“You killed people.” You uttered, “Took my life away, don’t you regret it?”

“Why would I?”

Right, how could a monster like him have such empathy? You feel his cold fingers brush against your folds, trying to stimulate it.

Everything except your body screamed no but you were just too powerless now. You wondered, how could you even end this all? Was jumping out the window the only solution now?

“...Right...” You let out a soft painful moan as he dips his finger inside. You’re under the idea that despite this happening countless of times, you’re body would be numb to it all yet each time it happens, it pains you even more, “You even had to kill your ex-fiancé’s father for us to get married.”

You had come to realize just how deep his obsession was, the man was willing to kill to anyone who got in the way of your ‘love’. You remembered finding out about your ex-chief one night, about how he had chopped off his fingers and left him to bleed dry in the alleyway for the rats to feast on.

You remembered when a news came up that his supposedly future-father-in-law had died in a violent explosion during breakfast time and how he was nonchalant about it.

“...It’s all for you, Y/N.” He implores as he kissed your thighs and continue to stimulate your now wet folds, “All for you, Tobio, and my new little girl.”

“You’re sick.”

“Mhm. You smell good, I should continue using the soap from awhile ago when I clean you, right?” he hummed, ignoring what you had just said as he dipped his head in and take a kitten lick on your sex. You let out a small cry as your body betrayed you.

Your prayers for today are unheard yet again.

“...Y/N, you barely come out of your room these days.” Komori exclaimed, it turns out the visitor from last time who knocked on your door was him and as much as you wanted to knock his teeth out, you decide not to because you don’t see the point in doing violence these days.

“I’m tired.”

“Yeah, pregnancy does take a toll on your body.” He nods in agreement, it seemed like this was a casual thing for him, like you just weren’t repeatedly rape or mentally abused by his cousin, “Tobio certainly takes after his father, don’t you think?”

Your blood runs cold at the mention of the little boy, you had small hope for him either ways so you didn’t exactly cared for him anymore.

“I suppose so.”

“You’ve gotten boring these days, Y/N.” Komori plainly pointed out, “It’s a wonder how my cousin gets to stick around ya. No offense.”

“None taken.”

Komori’s eyes narrowed at your hollowed response, you were so ungrateful. Here his cousin was, treating you with such delicateness and with all the attention that the other women wanted but you looked anything but happy about it.

If this was Hideko, she’d be elated.

But no, he had to be stuck with an ungrateful pompous bitch like you.

“How high up are we, Komori-san?” you suddenly ask.

He blinks at the rather weird question, “Fifty floors.”

“Hm.” You hummed, “That certainly is high.”

Komori would regret answering that question very soon though.

When the winter dawned upon a new year and you finally snap, you decide to answer your own prayers and opt to salvage yourself from this madness and cruelty once and for all.

Sakusa Tobio is nine years old when you, his mother, six months pregnant, jumped out the bedroom window from a fifty-foot story building two months into the new year. Your face is flat on the pavement and completely unrecognizable, the last conversation you both had replays on his head like a broken record through the years and only when he’s old enough that he realizes that he was no one’s son.

His okaasan didn’t loved him nor did he want to be associated with his father for all he did was bring pain and disgust.

The boy is eighteen, fresh out of the academy, right in front of his baby sister’s and your mausoleum. He makes it a habit to visit you both a day before your death anniversary, not wanting to be in the same room as his father yet this year he makes an exception.

Recently, he had turned over some evidence and his own testimony about what his father had been doing. Everything, from illegal works to the people he killed to your tragic end. It’s enough to file a case and have him set to jail for life, even his fancy lawyers couldn’t defend him.

His lips sting because his Uncle Komori had punched him in the face and called him an ungrateful bastard like you but it was alright.

It was all over.

He plans to change his name back to Kageyama Tobio (the haux name you had given him when you were on the run) right after all the fiasco, it’s a kind name and the first name you had given him, he likes to think that this was also a gift from you that time, a new beginning straying away from you and his father's cruel ties. He had also felt that it was too unkind for him to use your last name despite his grandparents' persistence (he was after all, conceived through forceful means).

And although he wanted to hate you for those words you said that time when he was eight. He couldn’t really bring himself to after hearing what you had to go through, you were a victim. He couldn’t dare imagine what his father did to you during the last few months leading to your death.

Yet, right now. It was finished.

You could rest now.

“I did it, Y/N-san.” He mumbles as he bows down. As he got older, he has also foregone the idea of calling you by the name you loathed and shriveled away from, “I got out and I didn’t look back. Thank you for everything.”

Kageyama Tobio never visits you right after again, as promised.

#haikyuu angst #haikyuu!!#haikyu scenarios #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu yandere #sakusa kiyoomi imagines #sakusa x reader #haikyuu x you #sakusa headcanons #sakusa imagines #sakusa scenarios #yandere!sakusa #yandere warning!!!#oh right tobio is ur son here #filthy rich #📝📝.filthy rich series #hostclub.adulting

685 notes · View notes

ddeonghwaa · 4 years ago

Text

Can We Fix This? (Jaehyun)

Characters: Jaehyun x reader

Genre: angst, romance

Word count: 5.9k

Hello! This is the sequel of my story “Too Late”. I hope you guys give it lots of love because I’ve been working on it for quite some time! Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Too Late, you can read it here.

“I’ve been really happy for the whole five years of being in love with you, Jaehyun. Thank you for all the memories we’ve shared. I know I’ve done my best for every single moment I had with you in this relationship, so I have no regrets. Regrets… I hope you regret what you did to me and reflect on your actions.”

"I did, I regret my actions so much y/n. Please don’t leave me.”

You shook your head lightly and took a step back away from him.

“I can’t do this anymore.” You looked at him for one last time, tears brimming your eyes. Tears that looked like fragile crystals, they could break any time. Before you let the tears fall, you said one last thing to him.

“Once you’re done packing my things, leave them outside.”

Your last encounter with Jaehyun kept on replaying in your head although a few days had passed. Breaking up with someone you have loved with your whole heart wasn’t easy. Everything now felt so… empty. You weren’t used to being with your own company.

Never would you have imagined yourself saying that to Jaehyun - who you thought would be the love of your life forever. But things ended up very different from what the both of you had expected. You didn’t want to blame Yewon entirely, because you knew your relationship with Jaehyun at that time wasn’t the healthiest either.

At that moment, as if Yewon knew that you were diving deep into a black hole in your mind about this, a text from her came.

Yewon: Hello, it’s me, Yewon. I’m sorry if I am bothering you. If you don’t mind, I would like to have a talk with you over lunch today.

You furrowed your brows in confusion, “What does she have to say?” At first, you thought of rejecting her invitation because you didn’t have anything to say to her. However, you ended up accepting her lunch invitation to listen to whatever Yewon has to say. Giving her a chance to justify her actions? Maybe you could forgive her then.

You immediately regretted agreeing to meet up with Yewon because it just made you feel worse about yourself. The two of you went to a nearby café and sat in front of each other. You hated - no - you despised this atmosphere with Yewon. “Why did you want to meet up?” You started. Yewon cleared her throat and looked at you. “Um, I don’t know if I should say this right now, after your breakup with-”

You shot her a glare when she mentioned about your recent breakup. Who in this whole world would think it was a good idea to bring it up to someone who just recently went through it? Especially when she was partly the reason for it.

“I just thought I’d tell you this. I’m really sorry but I have sincere feelings for Jaehyun,” You flinched when you heard his name, “and I am thinking of dating him seriously. I feel guilty because of you so I thought of asking you first about it.”

You scoffed at the absurd statement. Is this girl for real? The audacity to say this to me after what she has done? You thought to yourself.

Tried maintaining your facial expressions, you replied with an “Oh.”

After what felt like a long minute, you voiced, “You can do whatever you want. It’s not like he is my boyfriend anymore. We broke up, so he can date whoever he wants.”

No. I’m still not over him. I can’t see him dating anyone else. Especially you, Yewon.

You bit your lower lips, trying hard not to break down in front of her. The corner of Yewon’s lips raised as she shot you a smile, “Yeah, but I’m really sorry about your breakup though. I knew getting in between the both of you was wrong, but I couldn’t help it,” she said insensitively.

Her apology didn’t seem sincere and you were trying your best not to smack her in the face. She looks like she’s putting on this show to look like this sweet and nice girl that everyone likes.

“Go ahead, I’m not stopping you. But just so you know, Jaehyun really loved me and I don’t think he’d get over me that fast. What you had with him was only temporary flutters, not real love. He only wavered a little, he didn’t fall for you. He remembers every little thing we did together, every single date, every single kiss,” you shrugged and took a sip of the tea you ordered.

“To be honest, I don’t even know if he’d date you because you’d remind him of how we broke up. If you really end up dating him, I hope his memories with me will continue to haunt him and you would remind him of how he broke my heart. Although I got over it already now.”

Liar. You sound the total opposite.

“Yeah but I’ll try anyways because I really want to date him. I really want to give it a shot.”

“Yeah, go for it. You know what, Yewon?” You grabbed the glass of water in front of you and unexpectedly threw the water at Yewon without hesitation. “Don’t you think I at least deserve to do this?”

Yewon’s eyes turned big as she stood up immediately. She was shocked at what just happened and just stared at her dress that got wet.

Yes, this is not a dream. You really did that. You re-enacted a typical scene from Kdramas and it felt so satisfying. You didn’t even know you had the courage in you to do that. Other customers in the café looked weirdly at you and obviously showed expressions of sympathy for Yewon. But you didn’t care anymore. “I know it’s wrong to do that, but I couldn’t help it,” you shrugged, throwing back her own words to her.

“I hope one day you experience the same as I did. I hope you go through the pain I’m in right now because of you.”

“What did you just do?! I know you’re mad, but how can you do that?! UGH!” she shouted as her hands reached for her glass of water to throw it back at you. Your eyes squeezed shut, expecting yourself to get drenched, but nothing happened.

You peeked one of your eyes open and saw a hand stopping Yewon from doing so. A hand so familiar that you almost forgot he no longer belongs to you. It was Jaehyun.

You didn’t know how he magically appeared there but there he was, staring at you in concern. Your heart started beating so fast it felt like it was going to jump out of your chest. Your breathing started to get faster each second and your palms turned cold. Clenching your hands into a fist, you tried to calm down.

I miss you. It’s only been a few days but I miss you so much, Jung Jaehyun.

You snapped back into reality when you heard Jaehyun whisper sadly, “Y/n… Are you alright?” Letting out a sigh, you picked up your bag and gave Yewon a last cold glare.

“Go get your shot,” You started walking away from the two of them, not even sparing Jaehyun a look.

“She started it first!” You heard Yewon complain to Jaehyun right when you left and thankfully her voice faded the further away you got from the café. Every second felt so suffocating with the presence of him. You couldn’t hug or kiss him like you used to. You couldn’t even take a proper look at his face without breaking down right there. You wished you could get over Jaehyun fast. Or sometimes you wished things went back to how they were before Yewon appeared. But it was too late.

It has been a tough week after the incident and you couldn’t hang out with most of your friends anymore because the two of you shared a similar group of friends. You shivered at the thought of them asking about Jaehyun and how unprofessional you would react to their questions – like bawling in front of everyone because of heartbroken you were. Yeah, you didn’t want that. Also, you didn’t want to make them feel awkward and walk on eggshells because of the breakup, although they probably already knew by now or have caught on.

The following days were filled with nothing but avoiding Jaehyun. You created this mission for yourself to help you get over him fast. It was difficult because he lives in the same building as you and moving out from your apartment wasn’t really the best option now.

One time, the elevator doors opened and before setting your foot in it, you looked up only to see Jaehyun standing inside. He looked at you softly and pressed the open button to hold the doors for you.

But you weren’t ready to face him. You immediately took a few steps back and turned, running back to your apartment.

“Y/n! Why are you running away from me…” he sighed sadly and closed the elevator doors.

A few days after that, he waited for you in front of your class to talk. When the class ended and you exited the room, he took your hands softly and whispered, “Y/n, can we talk? I have something to say to you. Please.”

“I don’t think I want to hear anything else from you,” you replied as you signalled to your hands, “Can you let go of my hands, please?” Jaehyun’s shoulders dropped as he let go of your hands again. He really didn’t want to let go this time, but he couldn’t do anything about it.

You hated feeling this way about yourself. You kept on blaming how you weren’t good enough for Jaehyun, how you were so foolish to end this relationship when you knew for a fact that you can’t live without him. Your best friend witnessed your breakdowns and she couldn’t stand seeing you suffer like that anymore.

Being the amazing best friend ever, she made appointments at hair and nail salons to give you a treat and to just cheer yourself up. You were so grateful for her, because without her, you would have struggled so much more alone.

You felt bad for yourself for not trying all of these earlier, because looking at Yewon, she was so pretty, always having her hair and nails nicely done. She’s young and knows how to present herself prettily in front of others. You envied her for that. So after so long, it felt nice getting your hair done, getting manicures and pedicures in pretty colours you’ve never tried before. It was like turning a new page in your life, trying to start anew.

Jaehyun, on the other hand, was having the hardest time of his life. He couldn’t understand how you were coping up so well because he sees you smiling in campus from time to time and it broke him more and more.

He couldn’t concentrate in class, stared into space most of the time and looked so dishevelled as if he only showered once every few days. He even got into trouble for not submitting his assignments properly. He had lost weight because he’s not been eating well after the incident. His appetite never came back and he only ate a little to make sure he stays alive.

Basically, life was giving him shit. And it was what he deserved. He had the most precious human being with him for five years and he took you for granted.

Just when he thought things couldn’t get any worse, it did. His mother decided to visit him that week to drop off some side dishes. She usually drops by every two months ever since Jaehyun moved out from the family house to stay in the apartment located near the university campus.

"You look terrible,” Jaehyun's mother said as soon as she arrives in his apartment. She fixed Jaehyun's hair a bit and patted his head. “Thanks, mum. Really needed that,” Jaehyun replied in sarcasm as he raised a brow to look at his mother.

“I brought your favourite side dishes and I packed more for y/n too this time. You told me she really liked it last time, remember?” Jaehyun lightly nodded as she placed some of the side dishes in Jaehyun’s fridge and put aside the ones she brought for you.

His heart broke when he heard that because he hasn’t told his mother yet about the two of you. He knows how much she loves you and was hoping for the two of you to get married right after graduation. So, he couldn’t bring himself to tell her about the situation right now.

"Since I’m here, I should go drop by y/n's place too. Let’s go together, Jaehyun. Help me carry all these side dishes. They’re so heavy! I hope y/n enjoys them."

“Umm mum-" He bit his lip and felt genuinely scared. What if you were as broken as him? He couldn’t bear seeing you like that. His mother looked at him with a questioning look, “What?”

He blinked and lightly shook his head, “N-nothing. Let’s go.”

Maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but he was curious and wanted to see how you were doing. What if the smiles you had on campus were all just a show? How well were you actually coping with the breakup? Were you eating all your meals?

Jaehyun just wanted to see you.

Jaehyun led his mother to your apartment while carrying all the side dishes she has packed for you. She rang the doorbell, "Y/n, are you at home?"

Jaehyun unconsciously started biting his lower lips harder than usual that it turned so red. I’m finally seeing her after so long. He thought.

Not long after, you replied, “Yes, I am!”

You opened the door and bowed to Jaehyun’s mother politely, greeting her after so long of not seeing each other. Surprisingly, you didn’t look shocked or caught off guard even when you saw Jaehyun standing behind his mother. Instead, he was the one looking shocked with widened eyes. He looked like a lost puppy with sad eyes staring at you.

How much you’ve missed that man standing right there.

You just wanted to throw your arms around him and hug him tightly. You wanted to kiss his cheeks, lips, nose forehead, but you couldn’t. Instead, pushed your feelings aside and focused on his mother instead.

“How have you been, Mrs Jung?” you asked as you led her to the living room. She took a seat on the sofa and softly smiled while looking at you.

"I’ve been well as always. You look extra beautiful today, y/n. I can tell you’ve been well too,” she caressed your hands and patted them softly.

I’m not doing so well though. You thought, but you just smiled back at her in response.

“I brought some extra side dishes for you too this time. Jaehyun told me you really liked the jangjorim (soy braised beef) I made last time, so I packed more for you," she pointed at the containers that Jaehyun was placing on your kitchen counter and you thanked her.

You turned to Jaehyun, but he avoided your eyes. You knew that he probably has not told his mother yet about your breakup and you understood that. You knew Jaehyun didn’t want to disappoint his mother. So, you just went along with it. Although inside, you were hurting. Your heart hasn’t healed, and it was breaking more every second you glanced at Jaehyun. He looked so lost and unattended. You could feel tears brimming in your eyes but you tried holding it in.

Crying in front of his mother didn’t sound like a good idea.

"So, how's university and studies so far? Doing good?" Jaehyun’s mother asked as Jaehyun took a seat next to her after arranging the side dishes. You nodded in response, “Yeah we're graduating soon, so things are not that easy, but manageable, I guess. By the way, would you like some tea or coffee? I’ll make them for you.”

She shook her head, “It’s okay, I’m not staying that long but it’s good to hear that you’re doing well,” she cleared her throat and leaned closer to you, “Anyways, I hope you won’t get offended by what I’m about to ask.”

You blinked and slowly nodded, “S-sure.” Jaehyun sensed that something was coming. "Mum-"

Before he could even stop her, she has already thrown her question, "Are the two of you planning to get engaged as soon as you graduate?"

Silence filled the room and you could feel the tension rising.

Jaehyun groaned and ruffled his hair in frustration. “Mum, I told you to not talk about this.” She pouted, “I know, I’m sorry. I’m just curious about you two. It’s been a while since I’ve seen my future daughter-in-law.”

You awkwardly smiled without answering. Suddenly you felt as if there wasn’t enough oxygen in the room because it was suffocating. Jaehyun saw from your eyes how you were hurting and it was so hard for the two of you to be in the same space right now. So, he mustered up his courage and spoke up.

"Mum, listen,” he hesitated and took a glance at you, “We- we broke up. We’re taking a break from each other and it’s all my fault."

Your eyes widened when Jaehyun suddenly said that. You couldn’t help but feel bad for him.

Jaehyun waited for his mother to be shocked and yell at him for being such a jerk to you. He was expecting his mother to scold you for breaking up with her son. He was ready to face the wrath of his mother and was already expecting the worse. But his mother did the exact opposite.

The atmosphere was unexpectedly calm. It was so calm that it made you feel more uncomfortable.

She calmly placed a hand on top of yours and caressed it gently. "Ah I didn’t know,” she paused, “I’m so sorry for being insensitive about it, y/n. I don’t know what the both of you went through, but I hope you’re doing fine,” she smiled warmly. Her presence was so warm you wanted to just jump into her arms and cry your heart out about how much you’ve been hurting as if she was really your own mother.

Tears filled your eyes to the brim and Jaehyun’s mother noticed that immediately. She knew that the longer they stayed in your apartment, the harder it was for you. She then stood up and took her purse, “We should get going now, Jaehyun. Enjoy the side dishes, yn! Stay healthy, okay?” She smiled at you so dearly and patted your cheeks gently for one last time.

Such motherly love.

You let the tears fall slowly down your cheeks as you greet them out of your apartment because you couldn’t hold them in any longer. Jaehyun saw your tears and his heart broke even more. That’s when he realised, you weren’t doing so well either.

Jaehyun sat across Yewon in a café because he wanted to talk to her. He wanted to clarify things so she wouldn’t have hopes of wanting to date him. He knew his heart only belonged to you.

“You broke up with y/n anyways, and I’m partly because of it. You were also wavered by me at that time,” Jaehyun frowned at Yewon’s words, because he knew it was true. However, Yewon wasn’t the girl he wanted to be with. It was true that he was wavered by her when they texted each other daily, but it meant nothing to him.

He sighed. Yewon bit her lower lip and glanced at Jaehyun. “We don’t have to date straight away because I know you just went through a sad breakup,” she paused, “But I will wait for you.”

“Yewon,” Jaehyun started, “Even if a long time has passed after I broke up with y/n and I can date anyone I want, it wouldn’t be you.”

Yewon’s brows furrowed and she looked devastated. “W-Why not?”

“You keep on reminding me of her, so how could I date you?”

She scoffed as she heard his words, “What does that even mean?” Jaehyun let out another sigh, “The only reason I talked to you was because you reminded me of the young y/n I met in high school. So pure and innocent, felt like I needed to protect her always. When you approached me for the first time, you gave off the same vibes as her and that was what made me continue talking to you. You were so similar to y/n.”

Yewon stared at him in disbelief, “What? I-,”

Before she even continued, Jaehyun cut her off, “Don’t be mistaken. It’s not that I can’t date you because there’s y/n in the middle, but the reason I even noticed you was because of y/n.”

“So, what you’re saying is, you weren’t really wavered by me, but only talked to me because I was similar to y/n?” She said sadly, as Jaehyun lightly nodded in response.

“I’m sorry. I’m know that I’m also at fault for giving you hope back then, and I want to apologise for that. That is not something someone with a girlfriend should be doing, and I messed up. But let me tell you something, even if I’ve broken up with y/n now, I don’t have any thoughts of dating you at all. Heck, I don’t want to be with anyone else other than y/n,” Jaehyun took another glance at Yewon and drank his coffee.

Yewon looked so defeated and embarrassed because she was mistaken all along. She thought she could have a chance with Jaehyun after the breakup but unfortunately her plan went downhill.

Days and weeks passed as the two of you tried distracting yourselves with the upcoming exams. The final step before graduating college. You knew you couldn’t delve in deeper into being sad because of the breakup because it was affecting you negatively. But at the same time, you also knew how unhealthy it was to dismiss your own feelings.

It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to cry when you’re down. Everyone has those days. It will get better.

You tried telling this to yourself everyday and it was one of the coping skills that you realised helped.

But it wasn’t easy.

Traces of each other were left in daily routines and you can’t stop thinking about each other.

Is it normal for every breakup to be like this?

When Jaehyun ate meals alone, he felt so lonely. He missed being in your company where you had lots to talk about. Your happy, cheerful smiles brightened up his days and now he couldn’t see them anymore. All you ever asked was his attention and that was the least he could have given you, but he failed.

He remembered how much of a jerk he had been during your last few dates before you broke up. How dare he streamed a soccer game when in front of him sitting was the most beautiful woman? Too late for regrets now.

When he went to wash up, he saw your pink toothbrush next to his and remembered the times when you were too lazy to freshen up that he had to carry you to the toilet and make brushing teeth more fun. Jaehyun laughed softly at the sweet memory. Now his days were dull. He didn’t sleep, spent all his nights studying for finals. Bed feels bigger now without you lying there with him. He even spread out all the pillows he had to feel enveloped and cope with the loneliness he was feeling.

The bed depicts so much of his heart right now, empty.

On the other hand, you weren’t doing so well either. On the outside, you looked like you were doing okay. But little did people know you were hurting every night too. When you opened your drawer, you saw some of his hoodies placed in there for him to wear whenever he sleeps over at your place, and now he doesn’t come over anymore. You felt hot tears flowing down your cheeks as you shut your eyes.

You missed him.

You missed his scent, his touch, his presence. You missed having meals with him, watching movies together, cuddling, kissing, and just… loving each other. Maybe you missed Jung Jaehyun. Maybe, just maybe, you wanted him back in your life. You never expected him to affect you so much.

It was soon graduation day and you made it. You still weren’t sure how you survived university, but you did. After going up stage for the certificate giving ceremony, you found yourself outdoors at the campus, staring into space.

A lot had happened throughout your journey in university and you couldn’t believe that you even got yourself a degree amid the chaos. You looked down at your degree certificate on your lap and chuckled to yourself at how ridiculous your situation was.

Staying up at night while burning the midnight oils were already so difficult, but adding a breakup on top of that? It was the worst. You swore that you almost gave up a few times, but you didn’t want to affect your future just because of the incident.

Jaehyun didn’t bother you anymore after the day his mother came to visit because he couldn’t bear seeing you heartbroken anymore. He’d always just look out for you from afar, making sure you’re safe. He didn’t want to bother you, so you can study in peace. He promised to himself that he would give you some space and look for you only after graduation.

Now there he was, on graduation day, looking for you after the ceremony ended. In his hands were his folded graduation robe and mortar board. He spotted you from afar and his gaze softened at the sight of you. You also had your robe folded next to you, while you held onto your certificate.

With a thumping heart and nervous palms, he slowly approached you. You noticed a figure coming towards you and looked up. Your eyes matched Jaehyun’s and you swear you could feel your heart bursting. It’s been a while since you’ve seen him, and you forgot how it felt to get butterflies in your tummy. But your gaze turned sad when you were realised that you were not dating him anymore.

“Hey, can I sit here?” Jaehyun asked, signaling to the empty seat next to you. You nodded in response and moved to the side to give him more space.

He sat next to you, leaving a little gap in between in case you felt uncomfortable. “You look really pretty today,” he said, “I mean, you always do.”

“Thank you,” your heartbeat got faster at his simple words and you felt yourself turning red. The wind blew and you could smell his cologne that he usually has on him. The one you bought for him because you really liked the scent on him. You missed this scent so much that it felt so unfamiliar today. But it was nice.

“Congratulations on graduating. Your efforts paid off,” he flashed a sincere smile to you. You turned away immediately because you knew you couldn’t handle looking at him. You could cry any time now because of how much you missed him. But you didn’t want him to know that. You didn’t want to show him the side of you crying because you were the one who ended the relationship. You didn’t want to seem pathetic. “You too. Congratulations,” you whispered.

“How have you been?” he asked. You almost scoffed at his obnoxious question because he obviously knows you weren’t doing well after the breakup. “Good. You?” you said in short.

“Not really.”

You blinked and didn’t reply to his answer.

The breakup happened only a few weeks before graduation and the both of you were still broken because of it. You never really had a proper closure because both kept on running away from each other, avoiding the topic. It’s now finally time to sit alone and talk about it. Just the two of you, nobody else.

“Finals really took a toll on your life, huh?” you joked, trying to make the mood livelier. But you still avoided eye contact, and it just made the situation more awkward. “Yeah. That too,” he replied.

Silence.

Jaehyun sensed that you were avoiding his eyes, so he tried to change the topic.

“Remember when we graduated high school a few years ago?”

You nodded in response, “Yeah. What about it?”

Jaehyun slightly glanced at you and chuckled to himself, “Am I the only childish one who remembers what we said then?’ You raised your brows in confusion.

He replied, “I thought we could conquer the world then. I really thought graduating high school was everything,” he laughed, “But you made me promise to graduate university together too.”

You smiled softly at the fond memory of innocent high school kids graduating. Both of you ditched the rest of your friends to go on a jjajangmyeon (black bean noodles) date together. “Yeah and we made it. We graduated both high school and university,” you replied.

Jaehyun lightly nodded and continued after a few seconds of hesitation. “But I also made another promise.”

He searched for your eyes, and this time, you looked into his sad eyes to listen to what he has to say. “I promised you that I’d take care of you and that I’d never hurt you. Your trusted me with that, but I-,” he stopped and let out a sigh, “I couldn’t fulfil it. I made you think of me as someone who would never hurt you, but I did.”

You turned silent as you listened to him. You felt bad that he thinks this way about himself. You never asked him to be perfect, you just wanted his presence in your life.

“Y/n,” he called. “Hmm?”

“I don’t think I can let go of our five-year relationship just like this. Things were so good for the five years, and only a small part of it went bad. It’s all my fault and I’m really sorry for that.”

You bit your lower lips and fondled your fingers in nervousness. You didn’t know how to reply to Jaehyun and your heart wasn’t calming itself down any moment now. You turned to him and caught his eyes. They looked so fragile, he had tears in them that looked like they were ready to fall any time now.

“I was so caught up trying to do my best for you to a point where I lost myself in between that. It made me scared whenever I think of you finding someone better than me because I know I’m not worth your love. You deserve someone so much better than me, so I tried becoming better. I tried to improve but I found myself getting lost. I sought assurance from someone else to make myself feel better, but it didn’t,” you knew he was talking about Yewon, and you nodded lightly, signalling him to continue while you listen.

“I thought that maybe talking to you less would lessen the mistakes I make, but it ended up making things worse. I was lucky enough that you gave me another chance- heck, you gave me a lot of chances and I blew them all away,” he ruffled his hair in frustration, ruining the hair he had prepared for graduation. Your brows furrowed as you stared at his now messy hair. You wanted to reach out and fix it for him, but he continued talking.

“I love you so much, I don't think I can ever let you go, y/n. The thought of losing you completely because of how I broke your heart hurt me so much that it almost killed me. You can call me a jerk, you can curse the heck out of me, you can leave me now, but I just wanted to say that it will always be you. It has always been you. I can never see myself loving someone else other than you, y/n. And I'm so sorry for hurting you. I regret it so much. I’m- I’m really sorry.”

At the end of his words, Jaehyun was already sobbing. He covered his face with his hands and just kept on crying. Your heart broke at the sight and you felt yourself tearing up as well. You extended your hands and reached out to pat his back gently. “It’s okay,” you said, “It’s okay to let it all out, Jae.”

You wiped your own tears and sniffed silently. “I’m sorry too. I should have trusted you more and gave you a chance to properly explain yourself, but I didn’t. I went along with my anger and broke up with you.”

Jaehyun’s sobs got softer and he looked up to face you. His eyes and nose were red from all the crying, but you still thought he looked adorable.

You chuckled although you still had tears in your eyes, “Do you think we can fix this? Fix us?” You asked him and gave his hair a quick fix. Jaehyun’s eyes widened as you asked that. “Does that mean you’re giving me another chance?”

You softly nodded and smiled.

“That day, when you met up with Yewon at the café after our breakup, a friend of mine was there. She didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but she heard what you said to her and told me. My friend said maybe it could help me be less angry towards you,” you chuckled, “And weirdly, it did.”

Jaehyun sighed in relief and a small smile started to appear on his face. “You told her that you talked to her because she reminded you of me?” he nodded in response to your question. “Then why didn’t you just talk to me? I was always there with you,” you asked.

Jaehyun nodded and slowly took your hands into his. Your hands were so cold because of the nervousness earlier, and the warmth from his felt so nice. As if his warm hands were made to hold yours in them. “I told you I feared making mistakes and hurting you. I wanted to be the perfect boyfriend for you and I still want to.”

You furrowed your brows, “You’re perfect with all of your flaws, Jaehyun. I thought I’ve always told you that. I love you as you are, and I don’t need you to change any bit of it. I love you, Jung Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun felt his heart beat fast when he heard that. He held your hands tighter and looked you in the eyes softly. “I love you too, y/n.”

You teared up again and slowly wrapped your arms around Jaehyun to give him a big, tight hug. A hug you’ve been wanting to give him since forever and today you finally had the chance to. Jaehyun returned the hug and wrapped his arms tightly around you too. He whispered, “I’ll never let you go again.”

“Let’s go get jjajangmyeon, just like the old days?” Jaehyun asked when you released the hug, “Anywhere with you sounds great,” you smiled and caressed his cheeks. Jaehyun leaned in and gave you a peck on the lips. Your brows raised and he shrugged.

“Couldn’t help it. My girl looks amazing today.”

The both of you stared at each other for some time and laughed. You went through so much together and now, you were happy you got back with Jaehyun. Jaehyun was also elated because he finally got bac together with the love of his life. “No one else, only you y/n.”

To happier days ahead.

It’s never too late.

masterlist

Tell me what you think of this piece! Your comments give me lots of strength and motivation to write more and improve. I hope all of you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for your support! I really appreciate it.

748 notes · View notes

supercorp-hosie · 3 years ago

Text

My thoughts for Legacies 315:

1) for the Star Wars, I have no knowledge about it, I saw some parallels of characters after the episode, it seems accurate, but I still have no idea why Hope’s characters in it didn’t even have a backstory or name lmao. I’m just overall unfazed;

2) the background of the trio and Alaric! There are like so much to address and I don’t know how to fully share my thoughts in-depth organisedly. I’ll try;

3) facts first: so it’s canon that Lizzie’s mental problem is diagnosed at earliest 11, but specific time unknown;

4) Jed activated his curse earliest at 11, since Lizzie had a crush on him for two weeks. I mean who would’ve thought that, common headcannons seem to incline on Josie x Jed tho😂. That just doesn’t randomly cross my mind🤣. Anyway, it doesn’t deny that Jed and Josie could be a thing too, since the twins often have the tendency to crush on the same person? I’m feeling like 60% of the time? I mean they obviously have the same preferences for LI, bad girl or bad boy type, anyone? Rafael, Sebastian, Jed, Jade, Penelope, Hope, Finch. They kind of have this thing with new people to their lives, for Josie, Rafael, Finch, Jade(it’s arguable but I think people tend to have a whole new lens when reconnecting with a disappeared person in your life for years when you’re very young. The perspectives are not the same, like you’re meeting a new person especially you don’t really know them before);

5) especially Lizzie, she definitely has a thing for new people that seems like bad boy/girl. I emphasised on the new people here bc I don’t think ethan is exactly that type, it’s just how Lizzie imagine him to be in that AU. Raf, Sebastian, Ethan....(maybe Jed was new when she crushed on him too, who knows), more specifically, it’s Strangers to Lovers trope for her romance department, so she can imagine as much as she wants and have the wildest dreams (bgm intended). Maybe Josie’s it’s not as much like this considering we don’t know how Posie happened, and with Hope her crush is canon when she was 12, but we don’t know how long exactly the crush was and when did it started, I just have to count that not being new person into her life. But I do get that why Josie said Lizzie always get the boy/girl Josie crushed on too, mostly they have the same type and preferences. Though they can randomly blurt out characters that we all don’t even know as more solid examples.;

6) Alaric and the fact of him being quite an absent father since the twins were 11 is solid canon. I understand the need to care for Hope because the world can’t afford a tribrid went uncared for and went around killing people, but still, the different perspectives of Hope and Lizzie to Alaric are very sad. To think that your father would betray you for another child, is very sad, even for Lizzie, the more dramatic one. So I understand that Caroline wasn’t there for the twins either, another absent parent. About the mother figure being diminished here, I’ll address it in another point. What’s left for Lizzie? Josie.

7) So basically Josie had to handle herself and Lizzie’s all by her own? That’s very hard! My BFF is bipolar, we are not living together, but before, my whole situation [for being in love with her + her situation] had really been hard for me too. I couldn’t imagine what’s it’s really like for Josie. (Another point that I need to address is the real mental problem that Lizzie has) Sure Alaric might not always be absent, but the intensity of Lizzie’s perspective begs to differ. Josie had to understand what is Bipolar at a very young age; had to be there for Lizzie when she had her outburst; had to be the one constantly check on Lizzie whether she had taken her meds; had to digest the emotion impacts from Lizzie after the outburst; had to understand how Lizzie functioned when she was down. None of that are easy, and there’s no one there to ask of what Josie really feels. How Josie pent out? What does she need? Josie might feel the need to be not wanting things and always be good so that she can get the love from Alaric (I remember in season 1, Josie felt the need to lose the game to get on Alaric good side) . So she just started to suppress her voice and her needs, because Lizzie need them the most. Over time or years of suppressing in front of her dearest family, she most likely felt unneeded by her parents, and forgettable to her parents(the girl that’s so quiet that her parents forget about her, the girl that Penelope won’t fight for anymore). She needed to feel needed, so she just let Lizzie take all of her, from whom she felt needed the most. So all of these from Josie’s perspectives, it started a vicious cycle for the twins. And leads to how the twins dynamics and how Josie are in present days. But her problem was never solved, they just accumulated day by day, year by year, leaving the good and dark side from Josie being so separated and unbalanced. The inner turmoil is always there. These lead to the extreme polarity of Josie’s good and bad side. When she’s doing bad, Josie would be especially aggressive than she needed to be because that’s an instinct to compensate the lack of action before. After long suppression, once being released, the instinct would be stronger than usual and harder to get it under control. Under the influence of dark magic, Dark Josie felt like another personality inside Josie here to take over the whole Josie and protect their interests that true Josie are neglecting. Kind of like dissociative identity disorder but not really it?? It’s just an understanding that I’ve been wanting to express, but so hard to organise it, because it’s so complex. By this understanding, I do still think that Josie should still be held accountable for her actions, even when dark magic was influencing her, like even people with mental health illness should be instituted and lost their freedom. I just think that it’s not fair to think she’s straight up very evil and do nothing good for people. It’s not like she’s being dark for no reason at all. This just mean that the dog that doesn’t bark can be more harmful than people think. These doesn’t mean that when Josie goes dark, she doesn’t deserve any leniency at all while holding her accountable. (And it’s not like she’s not beating herself up for most of the things she had done) Oh and sure, Josie should do the healthy way of voicing out these needs and all, to encourage a healthy dynamics between them like she’s the only healthy one between them, but still the problem is, they both lack the environment and guidance to make a healthy working relationship between themselves. How could they know what is healthy when the environment was already lack thereof.

8) Reading Lizzie’s diaries is bad, I understand, because you literally need to understand what leads to what, to gain control when your life is a chaos, but still. It’s even worse when you have that need to confide in another person to get things out wrongly. (I was having a phone call during the diary sharing review, but this is what I vaguely get) a) Josie is confiding the contents very specifically to another person that Hope can somehow reconstruct a sequel to it? b) Josie chose the wrong place to confide it since when she gets emotional, people can probably hear what was shared. At least from what I guess I got, it isn’t stated that she spread it to the whole school nor it was spread to the whole, even if that’s the case, it may not be on purpose, and she chose the wrong person to confide in. Like about the reveal in 112, she made up that Hope talking bad about Lizzie to the whole school, but it doesn’t mean that she spread it nor the whole school actually knows. Another case is, even if the school knows, it could easily be known by any passerby to Lizzie outburst and spread in the school. From what we saw from 101, the kitchen is a public space, the utensils and cutleries breaking should be very alarming, and there are students with intensified senses in the school. By that fact itself, it doesn’t really help Lizzie in being discreet of her illness. Still, sharing your sister’s diaries after reading it is really bad. But I do get that, sometimes you really need to talk to someone that know some of the situation but don’t really know the person in question to recalibrate yourself. But that person have to be like the dead end of all school gossip but not close to Lizzie, so it can do no harm (because he/she/they literally have no use to talk to someone with all these, usually there’s this no name policy, but with Lizzie being her sister, it’s useless hiding, maybe) when you disclose something related to her pertaining your own issues. Josie should apologise for sharing Lizzie diaries, even if Hope was not meant to know that, despite her werewolf hearing. For the reading part, did we get the apology tho? I guess we had? If negative, apologies needed.;

9) From Lizzie perspective, we can see her does Josie wrong but didn’t apologise either. Like Lizzie being princess but Josie being her android, personalised valet? It just showed that during that period of time(specifically from when until when tho, that’s a question), after what Josie had been enduring, taking care of her, Lizzie thought of herself being princess but didn’t actually think Josie as her equal? Like how the Android was programmed to bow to Lizzie? That’s just the habit of the twins dynamic showing, also partly Josie mistake, but Josie does deserves to be perceived as more than that, even when she’s derogatory to herself, Lizzie should uphold that for her. Their dynamics is just sad because it’s not entirely the twins fault, it’s also due to the absent parents in the household, they didn’t know better, they can only depend on each other. They’re orphaned like Hope in a way when their parents are still present. Even though they have privileges as Alaric’s daughters, but that doesn’t help with their real situation. This is just a perfect example of how your family shaped you, but we can still fight to shape ourselves after the power that our parents have over us gradually diminished, like how they’re starting to shape themselves more now as they’re coming to age.

10) What really warms me from the Android situation, despite Josie feeling like she’s being degraded the whole time, a subject to Lizzie, is that from how Josie is the combination of two Androids, also shows that how Lizzie actually looked up to Josie. Maybe it’s not addressed, but I see that. For Lizzie, Josie can really do so much things for her, take care of her so closely that Lizzie can count Josie as her personal valet. Derogatory, yes, but that place is also very important to prince and princess, bc they can literally do nothing to take care of their daily lives themselves well, like Merlin for Arthur (I mean the actions, not the presumably romantic relationship). Without Merlin, Arthur life is a mess! And the knowledge for Android part, it means that in Lizzie’s mind, Josie actually is like the person who knows everything😂 usually that figure should be our parents😭, but for Lizzie, it’s Josie, like she knows the answer to all. It’s sad and warming at the same time. Just more appreciation will do! And the fact that the special sword that they’re finding the whole time was in Josie’s thigh, just show how the trust that Lizzie had in Josie, not even their parents can triumph it, because Josie was the one being there the whole time. So they really deserves each other despite all the shitty things they have done to each other.

11) about Lizzie mental illness, I was recommended a post informing people about how Legacies fucked up Lizzie’s illness. After my own research, I do agree with the OP, I think that Lizzie situation is more like borderline personality disorder rather than bipolar, but that doesn’t make the whole situation easy. I can provide the table I made the next time regarding that.

12) Hope being Lizzie’s villain is really fitting, lmao, the intensity of Alaric care for Hope is so much that even Lizzie thought that Alaric would betray the twins for Hope.

13) I like Hope’s look. Josie being the Android that malfunction sometimes is funny too, especially when Josie is angry the whole time, cuz it’s infuriating too🤣🤣

14) Hope and Josie during Lethan kiss is me. How they’re totally in the same team when Lizzie being like that? Hosie are both wary of their characters and backstory? Hosie rights. Hhhhhh, oh Hope might be jealous of Ethan😂 Hizzie rights.

15) Another Hizzie rights, Hope wrote a sequel to Lizzie fanfic. And..... is Hope officially a nerd too???? I can’t! Hhhhh but maybe not, or else Hope would have known who she was.

16) Lizzie says, maybe deep down I still feel that you’re the chosen one (IN HER OWN STORY)

17) Younger Hope kind of break my heart more. It’s so sad😭😭 how she’s in denial of their parents death, and blame it on herself.....no baby. How Hope just have to tell herself all that again. And about Hope being scavenger, I think it’s fitting too. Her life, like the twins, is in pieces too. She had to pick them up herself, and build a world where her heart and hope can rest safely, and that just make her not mad at Josie burning down her room gayer. She was so closed up to herself that her room is like another world for her. So forgiving Josie just because of her crush, is like Josie and her crush on Hope meant the world to her???? Hosie rights! Anyway, Josie still messed up with that.

18) Having Younger Hope saying those things to Josie, oh my heart! Josie is a protector for Hope! Hosie rights! And Hope knowing the truth to stop Lord Marshall! Malivore, and Josie just stop talking because she doesn’t want to encourage Hope to die😍😍 Younger Hope actually wants to be best friends with the twins!!!!

19) Hope literally just stop growing taller after 12/13 like I did, is fact! And I’m comforted by that, sorry not sorry, lmao!

20) For real I don’t understand why Hope is suddenly full tribrid at the end. When she fights with Malivore.

21) The gun fight and sword fight is so weird! It’s like the gunners don’t know how to shoot at all, like they’re in slow motion, difficultly level easy to the audience, it’s so fake. I’m for Hope being badass, but it seems like the show doesn’t know how to portray a good fight scene. The sword fight is like in slow motion. And if Hope is to combine magic with sword fighting, she should combine them more. I don’t feel she’s badass at all, cuz it’s literally level easy😑

22) Star Wars AU have brought up so many childhood unresolved for the trio to understand each other more and be a better team. I love them ended up being all supportive and the panda promise🤣🤣 I love that the twins just agree not to let Hope die like that. But they’re like promise that a little later than Cleo and Landon? My team Sowanby! Applause to Handon, but please don’t be together again! Strike three, no is no!

23) for MG, Jed, Kaleb, they really need to make up with each other, I’m glad that they finally made it. And Kaleb being jealous of Methan? Lmao! And MG didn’t even say Ethan name? I love Maleb bonding, and MG never left his man behind!! Another things is, what’s wrong with those boys fighting scenes? We saw them throwing valuables to distract the monster again?! What if the keys are damaged? How are you going to go home? Oh and Jed being useful!

24) Jed last name is Tien, 田/填 in Chinese, I’ve shared enough in my other post. But still WE DONT ACTUALLY HAVE JED FIRST NAME! Give us that!

25) Still, I don’t understand how the wendigo is not dead yet. And how come it’s defeated by fire this time??

26) I don’t quite actually know what’s happening with Dorian. Is he okay? I bet he is, so Emma is coming back, right? Based off what the conversation is? We need Emma, really.

27) regarding Emma, is the lack of mother figure that I want to address when stating the twins dynamic. I don’t actually know a lot from TVD or TO, I just happen to know some general things and snippets from edits. But I know Hayley’s words before she dies, like “I’m not going to teach my daughter it’s okay to let people she loves die” and paint art, have at least one epic love? But for real, in legacies, all I get for Hayley is 103, Josie paying her respects, but none other than that. It’s all Klaus. I believe that Hayley is an important figure to Hope too. But she’s not mentioned enough, it’s kind of erasing her impact on Hope?? Like Caroline too, we get her phone calls, the twins trip to Europe to treat their problems off-screen, the letter for Lizzie in 302, the recommendation for Lizzie to go to the witch retreat, but not vetted by Alaric.....yes she get all these and Jo Laughlin being there in 106 (I cried so hard). But still the mother figure is still being minimised. Like in Lizzie’s fanfic there’s never a place for Caroline? How surreal? It doesn’t make sense. (I understand the actress is just not returning). But still these doesn’t change the fact that the show is lacking a mother figure as a whole. Emma should be that.

28) Clarke!!! Like it’s predictable! But what’s unpredictable is that he went straight to shower🤣🤣🤣 I love his snarkiness! Clarke meeting Hope half naked! Holarke! Hhhhhh

I’m too tired, sharing this episodes thoughts is exhausting me. There must be something I left out, please feel free to remind me!

57 notes · View notes

ravennm84 · 4 years ago

Text

Lyre Festival Justice

Here is the sequel to Lyre Festival Fraud where you get to see exactly what happened to Lila during her long weekend after she went back to Italy. I thought, at first, that I may have gone to far with the salt... But it’s Lila and I really don’t like her character. So, Warm-Fuzzies and enjoy this salty goodness!!

It was a beautiful day in Rome and Lila was enjoying her shopping spree around the city. She and her mother had spent the first few days after moving back to Italy unpacking and getting settled. It was Sunday, and her mother had to go to the embassy to make sure that all of her paperwork had transferred from Paris, which gave Lila the opportunity to spend the money she’d gotten from the idiots from her old class. Really, she couldn’t believe how stupid they all were to have just handed her over €2,000 for a luxury vacation in Venice. She should have gotten at least €3,000 from the class, but that Mari-brat and stick-in-the-mud Adrien had convinced some of them that she was lying. Oh well, €2,000 was better than nothing.

Best part, none of it could be traced back to her. They travelled to Venice on their own, nothing had been written down, her old mobile phone was disconnected and in a landfill somewhere, and she would just tell her mother that she had gotten all her new clothes at a thrift shop she remembered from the last time they’d been living in Rome. And if the idiots got in trouble and tried to say that she was involved, she’d turn on the tears and her mother would side with her like she always did. Seeing a little cafe, she stopped in to get a good cappuccino, it had been too long since she’d had a deceit cup of coffee.

It was mid afternoon by the time she got home. She had made a stop at the thrift store to grab a couple of their shopping bags to hide the real ones inside. It felt wrong to put a Versace skirt in a bargain bag, but one does what one must to keep her life going smoothly. Opening the door to the apartment, she barely caught sight of her mother sitting on the couch before Lila started gushing about how great it was to be back in Italy and all the things she’d missed.

She prattled on for a couple minutes before noticing that her mother hadn’t said anything. Turning to look at her, Lila flinched when she saw her. Something was seriously wrong, the last time she had seen her mother so angry was when she’d told her that her dad was cheating on her. That hadn’t been true but they had ended up getting divorced anyway, which was to Lila’s benefit since the man had always called her out on her lies.

“Is everything okay, Mama?” She asked cautiously, doing her best to sound and appear small and innocent.

“Sit down.”

Her tone left no room for argument. Lila set down her bags and sat in the chair across from her mother.

“Mama, wha-”

“Be quiet!” She snapped, and Lila shut her mouth. This actually seemed worse than the fight her parents had before they divorced. “I received a very strange email on Friday night, from a former classmate of yours in Paris. It seemed that the majority of your class was under the impression that we were throwing a party for a lot of important politicians, celebrities, and musicians on a private island and you had invited them. I told myself, ‘not my daughter, she would never do something like that’. But the email went on, with a list of the students that were supposedly going on this trip and gave you money for the expenses. Again, I thought ‘Lila would never be so cruel as to steal money from her friends right before we left Paris’. So I told the person who sent me that detailed information, that I would handle it. I still thought it was a joke.”

The teenage girl didn’t even have to listen to the end of this story, she knew that goody-two-shoes Marinette had ratted her out. Lila was fighting every instinct she had to run and lock herself in her room, but if she moved even a little her mother would stop her. She could only sit there and hope that she could come up with some kind of lie to convince her mother that she was being set up.

“Then when I went into the embassy today, my boss pulled me into his office and started grilling me as to why I allowed seven unaccompanied minors entry into the country. I tried to explain that I had no idea what he was talking about, and then he started reading off the names. Do you want to guess why those names sounded so familiar?”

By this point, Lila was practically curling into herself to make herself appear smaller. She had to say something, any lie that would make her mother believe her and only her. Turning on the tears, she buried her face in her hands and spoke between sobs. Fake crying always gave her a few extra seconds to think before she had to speak. “I swear, Mama. I didn’t want to do it. Marinette forced me to take those papers from your office to give to our classmates so they could get into the country without their parents. I never took any money from them, I swear! Marinette was bullying me the entire time we were in Paris, I was scared of what she’d do to me if I didn’t do what she said. You’ve got to believe me!”

“So you’re saying that you didn’t tell your class about some non-existent party on a private island, had no knowledge of who was coming into Italy, where they were going, or anything like that?” Her mother’s eyes narrowed as she brought out her mobile phone.

Her hands were shaking as she kept her face buried in her hands, something about her mother’s tone and the way she spoke made this feel like a trap. But she couldn’t backtrack now, Marinette was her way out and she had to stick with it. So she nodded as she continued to sob into her hands.

“Then please explain this to me.” Her mother turned the phone towards her and Lila looked up, her face falling in horror when she heard her own voice. It was a video of her telling her class about who was going to be at the party that she and her mom were organizing, how she was going to need to know for sure who all was coming before the weekend, and Marinette had somehow gotten video of Alya and Nino each handing her €300!

It took longer than she would like to admit for the shock to wear off, but she was smart enough to stick to her original story. “It’s fake! Marinette must have made it to get me in trouble. Max probably helped her, he’s really good with computers. It’s all too convenient to be true. I mean, she sends you all this information about which people are going, how much money they gave me, and a story about a party on a private island in Venice, that anyone would be able to see is clearly fake. Can’t you see that I’m being set up?”

Her mother’s eyes grew harder as she stood from her chair, causing Lila to shrink even further into her own.

“You say that this is all a set up and you had no idea where your classmates were going in Italy, but you just told me the exact city where they were found. You left them waiting on a dock for you to come ferry them to that non-existent private island, and don’t even bother saying that you know which city because of the video I just showed you, because it never names the city they were in.”

Well, crap. She was about to try another tactic, but her mother cut her off before the first syllable left her mouth.

“Young lady, do you have any idea how much trouble you are in?” she yelled, her face beginning to turn a purplish-red and began pacing the room. “You forged my signature on multiple federal documents, endangered the lives of multiple minors, committed theft, and god knows how many other laws you’ve broken. I can’t protect you from this! You will be facing federal charges for what you’ve done!”

Lila felt her stomach drop to her ankles. “But-but that was all in Paris, and I had diplomatic immunity while I was there!”

“It became an international incident when you forged an ambassador’s signature on federal documents that endangered minors! My boss gave me a choice,” her voice grew even harder and colder than before. “Either you answer for what you’ve done and plead guilty, or I lose my job and we both go to trial for what you’ve done.”

“You’d let me go to jail for one little lie? It’s not like anyone got hurt!” Lila screamed, standing from her chair in a panic. This was much worse than she’d imagined.

“And what if they had been?” Her mother screamed back. “What if they had been kidnapped and sold into human trafficking? What if one of them had fallen off the dock and drowned in the channel or hit by a boat? I would be held responsible for that because you forged my signature! Do you not care about the people around you at all? What is wrong with you?”

“But nothing happened to them! It’s their own fault for being stupid enough to believe such an obvious lie. And you’re taking their side over mine? How dare you call yourself my mother and claim to love me!”

“Don’t you dare try to blame me for your bad behavior!” Her mother yelled back as she advanced on her, making her fall back onto the chair. Mme. Rossi looked back at the shopping bags she had knocked over when she had turned, revealing the Versace bag. Tilting her head back, she took multiple deep breaths before looking at her daughter.

“This is what’s going to happen. You are going to return everything you bought today, and you are going to explain to the managers of each store exactly why you are returning everything.” Lila was about to protest, but one look from her mother had her mouth snapping shut. “We will also be clearing out your savings to pay back your classmates for the money you took, their travel expenses, their parents travel expenses, and any money they lost while being away from their jobs to retrieve their children. After that, you will be standing trial for forgery and fraud. If you know what’s good for you, you will go before the judge and apologize profusely for what you’ve done and listen to everything the judge tells you. If you’re lucky you may receive a lenient sentence; but either way, you can expect your next school to be a reformatory school. And if you try to fight me on any of this, I will let a court appointed attorney with no experience handle your case instead of the family lawyer. Have I made myself clear?”

No longer having to fake her tears, Lila nodded to her mother, resigning herself to the fact that her life had been ruined because her mother didn’t love her and Marinette didn’t know how to keep her nose out of where it didn’t belong.

~oOo~

The rest of the day, Lila was forced to return everything that she bought back to the stores and tell the managers how she had stolen the money from her classmates and then abandoned them in a country and city that they weren’t familiar with. The people that overheard her were horrified by what she had done and the managers banned her from ever shopping in those stores again. After all, if she was willing to steal money from her friends, there was little doubt that she would steal from the stores.

After everything was returned, she was taken to the embassy where they recorded her confession on how she lied to everyone, forged her mother’s signature on the documents she stole, and how she scammed over €2,000 from her former classmates. After the confession was taped, she was taken outside of the embassy and handed over to the police to be kept in a juvenile detention center. She screamed at her mother, not believing that she would just hand her over like that, but the woman looked down her nose at her and said, “It’s time for you to face the consequences of your actions, young lady.”

When she arrived at the police station, she was relieved to see their family lawyer was waiting for her, although he was less than thrilled by what she had done. He explained that even as a minor, she could be serving 2-6 years just for the forgery of the documents, that wasn’t even factoring in the scam or reckless endangerment of seven minors. If she were to be tried as an adult, she could be serving 6 years for each document, facing serious fines and more time for each classmate she endangered.

After hearing that, Lila had to rush to the trash can to throw up. She couldn’t believe that one little lie could get her into so much trouble. But this wasn’t her fault, none of it was. If there was anyone to blame, it was that goody-two-shoes Marinette Dupain-Cheng. After all the effort she went through to destroy that girl, she just wouldn’t back down. She would make that girl pay for what she’d done. As soon as the charges were all dropped, she would do everything she could, use every dirty trick in the book to force the nosy girl to end her life and stay out of hers.

But that would have to wait for now. For the time being, she would do what her mother said and play her part. Act like the innocent girl that had gotten caught up in her own fibs while trying to make friends in a new country. She didn’t mean for anyone to get hurt or in trouble, she was just so overwhelmed and she is so sorry for everything that happened. She would need to cry a lot, that was a given, but she could do this. Just fake it until she could get her revenge on the girl that ruined her life.

~oOo~Three Months Later~oOo~

Lila hadn’t meant to lose control in front of the judge. She’d spent months locked away with a bunch of low-class delinquents, talking to different lawyers and quack-doctors before going to court. She had been the picture of innocence and childhood regret the second she walked into the courtroom, she was sure to get off all the charges against her. But she and her lawyer had been blindsided.

The quack-doctors had called her a narcissist and a sociopath, in need of desperate help. To prove that, all of her lies, everything she had said while in Paris had been brought into evidence against her. They’d exposed her truancy and forgery at her old school, found proof of her purposefully getting Marinette expelled, and faking interviews on the Ladyblog which brought her more lawsuits from a bunch of the celebrities she’d lied about.

Some of her classmates had come to give testimony on what she had done and said during her time in Paris. The goodie-two-shoes brat had even come to Italy to give testimony against her, though Lila hadn’t been allowed in the courtroom while she was there, as Marinette hadn’t felt safe to be in the same room. Lila’s lawyer had actually agreed, probably so she wouldn’t cause a scene. And she probably would have. She would have stabbed her in the face with a pencil, in front of the entire courtroom, if she had the chance.

But the worst had to do with the school security cameras. After M. Damocles and Mme. Bustier had been fired for neglectful and abusive behavior to their students, which had been brought about by the investigation into Marinette’s expulsion, the Board of Governors went farther back through the recordings to see how long the bullying had been going on. What they found was video evidence of Lila grabbing an akuma out of the air and putting it into her earring, and then willingly working with the known terrorist.

To make matters even worse, Ladybug and Chat Noir had sent a video as testimony of the times Lila had purposefully interfered with their rescues and had led Chat away from Ladybug to make her more vulnerable to the akuma Oni-chan. Her lawyer tried to get the video stricken from evidence as he couldn’t cross-examine the two heroes, but it was denied.

Her parents had been sitting behind her when they showed those videos. When her mother saw them, it was like she completely shut down. She heard her say that she wanted to leave, and Lila watched as her father helped her mother to her feet and lead her out of the courtroom without looking back.

The judge had been absolutely disgusted with her, going as far as to call her a monster for willingly aiding a terrorist. Since she had already confessed to multiple counts of forgery, fraud, and reckless endangerment of minors, and would now be adding slander and other charges from her time in Paris, the most notable being terrorism; he declared that she would be tried as an adult and was likely to spend the rest of her life in prison.

She’d completely lost it at that point, screaming at the top of her lungs as she jumped over the table to attack the judge. She didn’t remember smashing the water pitcher against one guard's head, scratching another guard across the face, or getting tasered in the back. When she woke up, she was strapped to a bed by her wrists and ankles, her head felt really foggy, and there were a bunch of nurses and orderlies that were keeping keen eyes on her.

Lila Rossi spent the rest of her life heavily medicated in a maximum security mental health hospital. Most every night, the nurses would hear her plotting some kind of scheme to show everyone what a loser Marinette was, but then she would trail off about how she wanted to hear the song Jagged Stone wrote for her or the album she’d help Clara Nightingale write. When she saw people, she would ramble and lie about being a princess or a secret agent, and that she was only here to keep her safe until they came to get her. Over the years, it was all written off as the insane ramblings of a very disturbed girl that would be remaining at the hospital for the rest of her life.

#lila salt #lila gets exposed #lila karma #ml fic #lila lies

892 notes · View notes

local-spoon-does-a-thing · 4 years ago

Text

Found ( Part 1/2)

[(Bayverse) Optimus Prime x Reader)

A/N: Okay so this takes place during Transformers: Age of Extinction. When I was younger I loved the movie (mostly because it had dinosaurs) but once I re-watched it...yeah, it was meh for me. In my opinion, first film was better than the sequels. Anyways, I thought “hey, what would happen if reader was separated from Optimus then reunited after all these years?” And so, I did it. I’m dividing this into two parts since I don’t want to make this too long. The second part is mostly going to be the interaction between reader and Optimus. Also, the reader is like in early or mid-twenties.

You can find the second part here!

Summary: 5 years have passed since you last saw Optimus Prime, your guardian. Since then, you’ve traveled with the Autobots and went in hiding with them. Just as you were about to give up hope, Optimus summons the Autobots.

Warning: Angst, angst, angst, angst, spoilers for T:AOE

It’s been 5 years since you last saw Optimus Prime. Leader of the Autobots, your guardian and best friend. In the aftermath of the events in Chicago, you thought that everything would somewhat go back to normal. Hunting down more Decepticons with your teammates, going on missions together, having Optimus scold you for not doing your homework. Though of course, nothing would be the same without Ironhide. His death absolutely destroyed you. But greater matters were forced to be looked upon, such as the public starting to see the Autobots as a threat, which was very stupid considering that they saved the whole damn world, NEST disbanding, the ‘Bots having to be on the run, and finally, Optimus disappearing from the team. With your long time contribution to the team, you were hunted down as well. Cemetery Wind demanded information about the Cybertronians, every single piece of detail, but you didn’t let them. Now with you being wanted and labeled as a fugitive, you could never truly return to your normal life. Your future dream university? Say goodbye to that. Your friends and family? You left with Bumblebee, not wanting to put any of them in danger. If they were, then you knew that their blood would be on your hands and you just could not accept that.

You supported Bumblebee when he was suddenly assigned as the commanding leader of the Autobot refugees. Despite them belittling and discouraging him, you stayed by his side. You always wondered what Ironhide would’ve done. He would’ve probably done things his own way. What would Ratchet do? You missed the grumpy medic and him meddling about your health. And Optimus...you missed him. A lot. You missed the times where he would be off-guard by some of your witty jokes, you missed how he would let you sleep in his alternate form whenever you dreamt of Decepticons, you missed his rare laughs and chuckles. You really, really missed him. As time went on by, you noticed that even Bumblebee was changing. He grew a bit more mature, but you knew that the responsibility of being a leader was too much for him. He missed Sam, and you did too. Though you two were only neighbors at first, you grew close and became siblings with one another. After his run-in with Cemetery Wind, you knew that he wasn’t coming back. At that point, you were growing hopeless. You tried getting along with Hound, Drift, and Crosshairs throughout the years, but you were too tired to hold up a conversation with them. Luckily, they reluctantly accepted you as a comrade.

As everyone was changing, you noticed that so were you. You were no longer joking around as much as you used to. You became quiet and serious. Yes, you would still give out encouragement and words of optimism to not let the flame of hope die out, but lately, it started to feel and sound fake. Were you trying to convince the others to not give up or were you trying to convince yourself? For the majority of the last 5 years, you tried believing that Optimus and Ratchet were still alive, just in hiding. Your poor heart simply couldn’t handle the weight of indescribable sorrow if news broke out that the two were gone. You’ve already witnessed Optimus die once and you couldn’t do that whole thing again. Hope was something that you needed but it started to become something that you could no longer grasp. When your dying flame of hope was at its last breath, that’s when he came in. The voice you haven’t heard in a very long time.

“Calling all Autobots. Calling all Autobots.”

It was Optimus Prime, calling from the radio. Bumblebee abruptly stopped the drive, causing you to almost hit your head against the steering wheel. After you hissed out his name, you turned to the radio in disbelief. Were you hearing things or was this reality? Bee then started to mess the radio until Optimus’s message was playing on repeat. No. Way. This was actually happening. You didn’t even have time to gather your thoughts before Bee started redirecting his coordinate and driving to where his leader was located, at full speed. Your heart was pounding and you were starting to feel the adrenaline rushing in. Reality still had yet to sink in. Everything was starting to get overwhelming, even if only a couple of moments had passed by. This was real. This had to be real.

You clutched your stomach and nibbled the bottom of your lip. This was supposed to be a great thing and it was! Then why did you feel sick to your stomach? You’ve heard of people throwing up from nervousness. Was this what you were feeling? Why were you nervous? You wanted to see him, absolutely! But after all this time, after all these years, were you even prepared? What if it was just a false alarm and you would get trapped by Decepticons or any other enemies? What if Cemetery Wind had already got him and tried to use him as bait? That last thought had almost made you puke right then and there. Whether you were ready or not, it was time.

You watched as the rest of the team had already met up with Optimus. The color of his alternate form made you stare at him with wide eyes as all the memories of you two together flashed for a second. Your jaw slightly dropped open and so many things ran around your mind. You were so out of reality that you hadn’t even noticed Bumblebee already transforming out of his alternate form and perching you on top of his shoulder. As he walked towards him, you watched Optimus’s transformation one last time and as always, it never ceases to amaze you and put you in a trance.

“Humans have asked us to play by their rules. Well, the rules have just changed.”

His deep voice filled your ears and for the first time, you relaxed. You could never forget what he sounded like, even during your darkest moments when you had tried to forget in an attempt to get rid of the pain that tore your heart to shreds. Words could not do justice to how you were feeling at this exact moment. The moment when you were finally reunited with your long lost guardian. Bumblebee gently let you down from his shoulder and as the team argued and bickered, all you could do was stare and not move. If this was a dream, then you never wanted to wake up. After an eternity of staring, Optimus’s optics met with your [e/c] orbs and you swore that you saw his breath hitch.

You weren’t the only one that was worried. During Optimus’s time away from the team and trying to stay hidden, there was not a single thought where he would not worry about you. He always wondered if you were okay and...still alive. It broke his spark every time he imagined that you were dead, six feet underground. Or worse yet, if no one had even known where your body was. He thought that once he would get out of hiding, and he knew that he would one day, the first thing he did not want to hear was that you were either found dead or missing. He hoped that you were out there, having a good life and spending your time in university. Until he went to slumber, until the day that he would be found by Cade Yeager, he yearned for the day where he would get to hear your jokes one last time.

Here you were. Alive and still moving with Bumblebee and the others. His expression softened ever so slightly and he felt a big weight being lifted off of his shoulders. He took a long moment just looking at you. You’ve certainly grown and he knew that you were no longer the bratty teenager he grew to love. Sadness washed over him when he realized that he didn’t get to see you grow up as he was absent for the past 5 years. Questions went in and out, but they were going to have to be asked later. He gave you an ever so slightly ghost of a smile and a small nod.

We can talk later.

You snapped out of your trance once Crosshairs and Hound pointed their guns towards the strangers that you had failed to notice earlier. A young lady, a man who seems to be her father, and another boy.

“Stop, Hound- both of you! They’ve risked their lives for mine.”

For a long time, you stood in the same spot Bumblebee had put you. It was like you had forgotten to move. But once you started to walk towards Optimus and the three strangers, each step made your knees feel weak. Nothing was fully sinking in, yet you continued on. You held out your hand towards them and went on to introduce yourself.

“Uh, hey there. The name’s Cade Yeager and this is my daughter, Tessa. I assume you’re with the other…’Bots?” The young girl next to him gave you a shy smile and a small wave before the boy came in.

“Oh and I’m Shane, by the way. Nice to meet you.”

You shook the three people’s hands and gave a small but welcoming smile. At long last, you finally got to meet some humans that weren’t hunting you down and trying to kill you. It felt so refreshing to interact with someone that wasn't an alien, car transforming robot.

“[Y/N], and yeah, I’ve been traveling with the Autobots for umm...a few years now or so. Also, I just want to thank you for helping Optimus. Seriously, you have no idea how grateful I am, along with the others as well.”

The way you spoke of Optimus’s name gave you a foreign feeling. Later during the straggling years, especially recently, you rarely spoke of his name since whenever you did, it always gave you an uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. But now, you were able to say it with ease after knowing that he was okay. Cade gave you a smile and scratched the back of his neck.

“It’s no problem at all, really. I saw the way you looked at him and I’m glad that I could help.”

Optimus stared and observed you during your whole interaction with them. There were so many things to say and so many things to discuss with you. Though as he promised, he would have to do that later. Your hair was a bit of a mess, your clothes were a bit dirty and there were some torn bits here and there from all the battles and run-ins you had with the enemy. If he were to look closer, he would be able to notice scars that have been implanted onto your skin. Gashes, cuts, bullet wounds; they were there. He tore his gaze away from you and looked towards the rest of the team.

“Autobots, we will remain here and recharge for the rest of the day. Once everything is settled, we will discuss further plans with Cade Yeager.”

And so, the whole team went to settle down for the day. To your despair, you had little time with Optimus to discuss pretty much everything that had been going on. He had wanted to talk to you as much as you wanted to talk to him, but he was already occupied with what Bumblebee, Crosshairs, Hound, and Drift wanted to tell him. All the reports and notable news about Cemetery Wind and some bickering between the team. Meanwhile, you tried to distract yourself by helping the Yeagers and Shane set up a camp. Drift had been more than helpful by chopping wood from nearby dead trees with his blades. Before you knew it, night had fallen. Hound was able to set a campfire by using measures that were too extreme for your taste. You sat down beside Bumblebee, staring into the crackling fire. You quietly listened to the conversation that was going on beside you. The Autobots spoke of any possible refugees that had come within the years while Cade was being the typical overprotective dad. That almost made you chuckle. It reminded you of your father whenever he saw you hanging out with a potential love interest. God, when was the last time you had even thought about your parents? You wondered how they were doing and if they were still kicking. You wondered that if you were ever to come back to them, would they ever forgive you for running away and scaring them to death? Your heart ached as you thought more about them. If you could just give them one message that told them that you were okay, that would be enough.

Suddenly, you looked up when you heard Drift talking shit about Bumblebee once again. Almost simultaneously, both you and the giant yellow robot rolled your eyes before he stood up from his seat and approached the giant blue robot.

“He’s like a child.”

“This child is about to kick your ass.”

“He brings us shame.”

It didn’t take long for the two to start brawling. You crossed your arms and legs and sighed as you watched the two of them getting it on. Normally, you would’ve tried to stop them and diffuse the situation, but you were just too tired. Too much has happened in one day and you deserved some rest. Plus, Optimus was here now. He could handle them. Then, you noticed the three other friendlies move towards your side, taking a couple of steps back behind you. You heard the girl Tessa comment on what was wrong with them. Ironically, that was your first thought that came into mind when you first met the refugees. Glad that you weren’t the only one.

“Lockdown is hunting us and humans are helping. We need to know why.” Optimus spoke.

“Listen, I don’t know why, but I have an idea about who.” Cade replied.

That led to you watching a couple of clips that he managed to snatch from a drone. Just as you thought that things couldn’t get worse, it did. You watched as Ratchet and Leadfoot had met their demise by the humans attacking them. Ratchet...the grumpy medic you became very fond of, one of the very first Transformers you’ve met. All the missions you went with him, all the meddling you had to put up with from him, and all the scolding he gave you because he cared about you. Though you weren’t as close to Leadfoot as you were with Ratchet, you knew that he was a good ‘Bot. Two of your closest friends, down and out. Ratchet and Ironhide, both who never got to peacefully pass away. You hung your head low as you rested your elbows on top of your knees. Your hair fell in front of your face as silent, bitter tears fell to the ground below you. “Savages” as Hound had called him. And he was right, that was the exact word that had described how the humans were in the footage. Ratchet had even begged that he was a medic and an Autobot. Your blood continued to boil even once the footage was finished playing.

Quickly, you wiped away the tears by harshly jabbing your knuckles into your eyes and looked towards the others as they continued to discuss what was happening. Cade mentioned that the headquarters were located in Chicago and had offered to help them with the mission. He told how if he didn’t help them, then they wouldn’t be able to get their normal lives back. Funny thing was that once you’ve associated yourself with the Autobots, there was no way your life was going to fully revert back to its normal self. You and Sam knew that all too well.

“Autobots, I have sworn to never kill humans,” Optimus said, “but when I find out who’s behind this, he’s going to die.”

This old robot always manages to catch you off-guard. In all the years you’ve known him, you have never heard him say anything with a threatening voice. A scary one, in fact. To you, he was the calmest person you knew. Calculated and dangerous, but he was calm. He defined a true leader. But he was going to kill humans? Just before he declared that statement, he admitted that he swore to not kill humans. You knew that he was enraged with what Cemetery Wind and KSI had done to his close friends and you didn’t blame him for wanting to kill someone responsible. It just seemed so off; so out of character. It was jarring.

#optimus prime x reader #transformers x reader #transformers #transformers bayverse #bayverse #optimus prime #bumblebee #crosshairs #drift #hound #cade yeager #tessa yeager #shane dyson #reader #fanfiction #autobots x reader

326 notes · View notes

jvnghxope · 4 years ago

Text

jamais vu; memory

part one;

◦ pairing: Hoseok | reader | Taehyung

◦ genre: vamipire au, smut, angst

◦ word count: 13.9k+

◦ warnings: dark themes; mentions of blood and death; vampire compulsion and manipulation; blood consumption; alcohol consumption; hallucinations; strong language; dry humping (sort of), this chapter doesn’t have smut but the next one will!

◦ abstract: In a time when vampires are the most despised creatures in the world, Jung Hoseok finds himself falling in love with a human. Would his love be enough to protect her from the war that is about to begin?

⇥ Sequel to Dalliance; part of the In the Shadows universe.

↳ chapters: prologue | memory | remedy | melody

Jung Hoseok stared at the invitation far too long.

The reason? It had his name and his name only. Which was surprising. He is used to standing behind the shadow that is the Jung Family. He is the youngest son after all, with only 215 years old.

He has a mission. A mission that was assigned to him by the Elders, which is a great honor. There is a rumor flowing around the Shadow World: a group of humans knew about the existence of vampires (if they knew about the existence of other shadow folks, it was a mystery) and they are slowly uniting to hunt them down. The Elders didn’t give it much of a thought at first. Vampires are stronger and faster than any human after all. There was nothing to worry about, they thought. Not until they found dead bodies of their kind. That is concerning. There are more humans in the world than vampires. Now that they knew how to kill them, their chance to win a fight was not impossible.

His mission is pretty simple: infiltrate inside the organization, investigate their plan and ruin them from within. How? The rumors say Lord Kim was behind all of it. It is his job to know if that piece of information is true and get to the good side of his younger daughter.

The journey to the Kim Manor from his Family's old home is relatively short, as both of the families lived in the same area of the city. The moment his carriage clattered into the ground of the entryway of the manor, his eyes widened. The Victorian building is surrounded by beautiful Italian gardens and greek gods in statues.

The vehicle stops with a jolt. A well-dressed servant opened the door to ease Hoseok out of the carriage. He thanked the peon with a nod. The main entrance is displayed before him. Enormous marble stairs led to a hallway, illuminated with lights made of silver and glass. The natural light of the sun was going down as the dawn took place. It is a beautiful sight, he has to recognize that.

The carriages drove away, led by a horseman, to a place they could wait for their masters.

Hoseok follows the people towards the entrance. The excited whispers of the attendees arrived in Hoseok's ears. A ball at the Lord’s Manor is something worthy to remember and the event of the year. Everyone is wearing their best clothes. Dresses made of taffeta, silk, and velvet, and tailored suits.

It’s the first time he is surrounded by a big crowd of humans. All their emotions come colliding towards him. It took a little while for him to shut them down. His powers are one of the main reasons he enjoyed being in solitude every once in a while. For some reason, human emotions are stronger than any other shadow folk. Being surrounded by a big quantity of humans is exhausting, to say the least.

Two corpulent men opened the big wooden doors and one by one, the guests entered the manor. In the entry, a group of men is slowly forming a line near a small room, where two young men received their coats, hats, and canes and gave them a label with a number.

A beautiful lady with a red dress led the guests through a corridor to the ballroom. It is the biggest room in the manor. Big golden chandeliers illuminated the room, giving it a golden light. Three of the four walls had large tables with white silk tablecloths, full of delicacies and the most exotic drinks.

Upon his arrival to the city, he made some of his peons spread the word that a new wealthy bachelor was in town. That’s how he got his invitation. As he strolls around, Hoseok could hear how the people are whispering about him. They don’t recognize his face, but they know who he was. The town is not relatively small, but wealthy people knew each other. Hoseok is a foreigner in their world.

A round of applause sounded when the Lord made his entry, his beautiful wife clutched by his arm and his firstborn, Kim Namjoon, walking behind them. The Lord gives a speech, thanking the attendees at the 22nd birthday of his daughter, the smallest of his children. To be honest, Hoseok didn’t pay too much attention to the Lord, instead choosing to finish his tasteless champagne and let his eyes wander around the room, rather bored. Then, his eyes fell on you, and wow.

And he’d be damned. You are the Lord’s daughter.

The Elders mentioned something about your beauty, but seeing it with his own eyes is something else. It is impossible to believe you are a mortal. Any in the Shadow World could easily mistake you for a vampire. Maybe even a fairy too. You are standing there, with your head held high as all the eyes in the room are laid on you. A smile bright enough to illuminate an entire city and a beautiful green dress hugging your frame. Hoseok couldn’t help but stare in pure awe at you. And he was not the only one. You had the power to draw the attention of everyone in the room. Subconsciously, he notices you opening your mouth. You are saying something. Words that don't reach Hoseok’s ears, too immersed in you.

Hoseok shakes his head the moment he saw people approaching you. To clear his mind, he takes one of the snacks that looked somewhat tasty and ends in one gulp of the contents of his glass.

“Jung Hoseok.”

He is surprised to hear his name and surprised even more to see a familiar face behind the voice.

“Taehyung," he greets.

His old friend grins, “I know I will hate the answer, but I’ll ask anyway. What are you doing here?”

“I’m guessing I am not the first one the Elders sent, right?”

Taehyung chuckles. “They sent me a month ago,” he confesses.

“What did you use as cover?”

“I used compulsion. They believe I am the son of a distant family friend that just returned to the city,” Taehyung replies with a sly smile. “I suppose I am not doing a good job if they sent you.”

Hoseok snorts. “They are getting desperate.”

“And they should. Things are worse than we’ve imagined.”

“Did you discover something new?” Hoseok asks, taking another cup of champagne.

Taehyung scans the room as he feigned drinking from his cup, making sure there was no one in ear-shot. “They have new allies,” he informs.

“Who?”

Taehyung turns to his friend. Hoseok doesn’t need to use his ability to understand how bad this. He can perceive Taehyung’s worry behind his perfectly collected smile. “Werewolves.”

With his eyes, Taehyung points to one of the guests. Hoseok follows, only to find a young man talking to no other than Lord Kim himself. Hoseok’s jaw clenches, “The Jeons.”

One of the oldest werewolf families and an enemy to vampires.

“Have you informed it yet?” Hoseok asks. The Jeon boy is now talking to Namjoon.

“Not yet. I am close to being invited to the group. My every move is being monitored.”

“The dog didn't recognize you?" Hoseok mocked.

At that, Taehyung laughed. “We haven’t crossed pads. But he is young. I don’t think he could recognize a Pureblood if he wanted to.” They share a laugh.

Hoseok manages to keep his eyes out of you for almost an hour, talking to Taehyung, making fun of werewolves, and catching up. It is like a little escape from the reality they are currently living. Like the old times, when things were less complicated. But you are a magnet and his eyes can’t help but look at you every once in a while.

"Should I introduce myself?" Hobi asks his best friend out of nowhere. He takes his 15th cup of the night (or was it the 16th? He can’t tell) as he waits for an answer. Human alcohol is not supposed to affect him, but he feels a little tipsy.

With cheeks flushed, Taehyung turns to look at him, “Who?”

“Ms. Kim.”

“Ahh,” Taehyung nods. “If you want to… Be my guest. But be careful. There are eyes and ears everywhere. But there’s something a need to tell you first-"

"Mr. Jung," a voice says.

His heart jumps at the sound of his name, and when he turns around, you are standing in front of him.

Hoseok never stood up too fast (humanly possible, of course), "Ms. Kim."

Wow, you are more beautiful up close. Your eyes look so bright the stars would be jealous. The color of your dress and the candlelight make your skin glow beautifully. Then, your scent fills his nostrils and his throat goes dry. Intoxicating and addictive. It makes his head spin. He gets why Taehyung wanted to warn him: you are dangerous… and somehow he doesn’t find himself to care at all.

“I believe we are not properly introduced,” you add with a smile.

“My apologies,” Hoseok bows slightly and outstretches his arm. Taking your hand in his, he gives it a little peck. Your skin feels so soft against his palm. “My name is Jung Hoseok.”

“Is a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Jung. Thank you so much for coming to my ball.”

“I guess I should thank you instead, for inviting a total stranger.”

You giggle and it is a melody he doesn’t want to forget. “There are a lot of strangers here.”

Hoseok opens his mouth, the perfect retort in the tip of his tongue and-

“___?” Kim Namjoon interrupted. “Father is looking for you.” Namjoon didn’t bother to look at Hoseok’s way, which he finds incredibly offensive. But wait, why does he care?

You nod at your brother but your eyes never leave Hoseok.

“Well, Mr. Jung, it was nice to meet you. I hope we can talk again sometime. Maybe over a cup of coffee.”

“It will be my pleasure,” Hoseok replies with a bow.

And you disappear with your brother through the crowd.

You hate these types of parties. They are full of shallow people. They give you the attention you didn’t want and being your birthday is the cherry on the cake. People are there more because of your father rather than because of you. It is something you are used to. People surrounding you because of your father’s power.

Your brother isn't of help, either. According to the girls your mother made you drink tea two times a week, he is handsome and the best gentleman they could ask for. And as much as you believe every word, you are also sure they only wanted him because he would inherit the royal title of the family and a couple of millions. They are nice to you only because you were his sister.

"Are you using your mountain ash necklace?" Is the question of your father the moment you arrived where he was and you reply with a nod. "Good. Those bloodsuckers could be anywhere."

“Dad...”

“Also,” it is like you didn’t talk at all. “I made some pawns fill the champagne with mountain ash, too. Open your eyes for the symptoms.”

“What symptoms?”

“This is like poison to all the monsters out there. If you see something suspicious –”

"–Honey, we're celebrating your daughter's birthday,” your mother grimaces. “Keep that stuff to your reunions." Then, she turned to you, "Sweetie, it's time to open the dance floor." She delivers a kiss to your cheek and urged you to enter the dance floor, where the guests are waiting with inquisitive stares.

It is a tradition in the royal families when a lady turned 21 to dance with all the bachelors. Like a greeting to society, the part you are anticipating the less. You are about to dance with a bunch of strangers you are not interested in at all.

With a forced smile, you compel yourself to walk across the room to the center of the circle the guests just made for you. A man is already waiting for you. The heir of the Jeon Family: Jeon Yongmin.

Great. He is currently the favorite of your parents to bethrow you into marriage. You can't complain, though. He is attractive (really, really attractive), he will inherit a fortune of his own and he is nice to you for being you and not because you had "Kim" attached to your name. He praises you and says how beautiful you look tonight. It is safe to say you enjoyed the few minutes you danced with him. You are finally enjoying the ball.

But the pleasurable feeling doesn't last. The other bachelors made you feel like you didn't matter, like you were a simple object, asking questions related to your family or not talking at all.

Dizzy and in desperate need of an escape, you fantasize about kicking some of them and run for dear life. But before you could put your plan into action, a familiar warmth spreads inside your body when no other than Kim Taehyung takes your hand. The smile of your best friend is enough to alleviate the pressure in your chest.

"You look gorgeous today. I didn't have the opportunity to mention it earlier."

He always knows how to soothe your nerves.

"Thank you. You look handsome today."

A smirk rose on his face. "I always look handsome."

"Oh, yeah. I forgot. The girls in here are either drooling for you, for my brother, or both." He giggles. “I didn’t know you were close to Mr. Jung.”

Taehyung clears his throat, “Yeah. Our families have a business together. I haven’t seen him in 5 years.”

You hum. “He seemed… nice.”

Taehyung raised a brow. He couldn’t comment on your statement and the next bachelor arrives. The next two gentlemen are just as boring, with nothing to say and lacking a good personality. You wonder how many more you need to dance with. Then, a tingle runs down your spine as the other man grabs your hand. You are face to face with Jung Hoseok.

“Mr. Jung,” you greet, suddenly out of breath.

“Milady. We meet again.” He looks stunning. Dark brown hair parted effortlessly over his forehead, dimpled smile, and honey skin. He holds your body tightly against his chest and your cheeks flushed. Even when you have danced with at least 20 men in the course of the evening, no one has held you like this. So…intimate. Not even Yongmin, whom you'd soon are to become his fiance. Not even Taehyung, who you already knew and have a friendship with.

To distract yourself, you attempt to make conversation with the man. “What brings you to our little Hylia, Mr. Jung?”

“My family has some properties here and I wanted some fresh air,” he responds, all his attention devoted to you. His eyes are intense and alluring. He smells like sandalwood and musk. He dances effortlessly, not paying attention to the steps. You? You are repeating the steps in your brain so you wouldn’t screw up in front of everyone. He is that distracting. He swirls you again and when your eyes return to his face, his eyes are red. You blink and it’s gone, a pair of chocolate eyes looking at you.

You smack yourself internally. Your dad is driving you crazy. Just because he sees vampires everywhere he goes, you don’t need to follow that path.

“I hope we made a good impression,” you say before you embarrass yourself further.

“You did,” he smiles and squeezed your hand, reassuring you.

The music is slowly fading, coming to an end, both relieving and disappointing. You wish you had more time to talk to him. A round of applause echoes in the room and you and Hoseok bow to each other. Before you could leave the dance floor, a new song starts playing. Panicked, you observe how other couples enter the dance floor, and if you desire to get out of here, you have less than 10 seconds to run or -

“Do you want some fresh air?” Hoseok whispers against your ear, stopping your meltdown. Without so much thought, you agree and let him lead you out of the crowd. He intertwines his fingers with you so naturally. Like they belong together. Your hand and his. You giggle all the way to the hallway.

“I don’t know where to go,” he turns to look at you, embarrassed. You can't help but laugh at that. He looks cute, all flustered.

“Follow me.”

It is your turn to draw him through the maze of rooms, doors, and corridors you call home. There is a series of small balconies facing the backyard and protected from sight by a large curtain. The moment you step outside, you let go of his hand and take a deep breath. It is nice to feel the chilly air against your skin. You relax both arms in the cold metal of the fence and watch the stars that are slowly rising in the sky as the sun fades away.

"I hope the ball was not boring to you, Mr. Jung,” you mumble and when you look at him, his eyes are already on you.

"Of course not. It was… pleasant."

There were very few candles on the balcony and most of the light is provided by the moon. The moonlight makes his features sharper, especially the curve of his jaw. Then, your breath hitches in your throat. His eyes are glowing. Perhaps you drank more than you remember, because the next time you blink, the glow is gone.

It is official. You are slowly losing your mind.

“So beautiful,” he murmured.

“P-pardon?”

He clears his throat, “The view of the garden is… quite majestic.”

Your cheeks flushed. For a moment, you thought he was talking about you. “Yes. It is my favorite place in the whole manor.”

He takes the final steps and stands next to you.

"Excuse me if I am noisy, but you don't seem to enjoy the ball that was made especially for you, Ms. ___."

“What made you think that?” You raise a brow, waiting for his answer.

“Well, there’s a bunch of people that came for you and you are here, talking with a stranger.”

A dry chuckle leaves your lips and you shake your head, “It may be my birthday, but it is just another ball with the same people, the same food, the same music and most of the guests are here because of my father. I don't tend to sound like an ungrateful child, but sometimes I get tired of this world. Does that make sense?"

You play with your fingers to avoid looking at him. You feel really comfortable around him. Like you can tell him anything and he won't judge you.

"I don't have many friends. Taehyung is one of the few to be around me because of me and not because I am the Lord's daughter. I have known him for a while now." You finally summon the courage to look at him. He gives you a sympathetic look, "I am sorry. I didn't mean to burden you with my problems, Mr. Jung."

“On the contrary, I am glad you trusted in me,” he says with a smile. “I hope that from now on, you can consider me as a friend, too.”

He leans closer, making your heart beat a little faster.

“Then, we should drop the formalities. Don’t you think?”

Something unreadable crosses his expression, but it is gone before you can pinpoint what it was. Instead, he beams at you. “You must call me Hoseok, then.”

“Well, Hoseok,” you enjoy the way his name rolls off your tongue. “I enjoyed our little time together. But I must return. My mother is probably already looking for me.”

“I hope we can meet again sometime.”

You walk to the entrance of the manor but before you get in, you turn around. Your heart jumps inside your chest. His eyes are still fixed in you, the air ruffling his hair in the most endearing of ways. He is breathtakingly beautiful.

"Good night, Hoseok," you murmur and open the door to get inside.

"Good night, ___," he whispers back.

You don't see the soft smile that stretched across his lips.

Hoseok never understood humans.

They are weak and fragile yet they enjoy living their lives to the fullest. They don’t care. Some vampires despise humans. They are shallow, greedy, and easy to compel. They only served for two things: make them do your dirty work and feed on them if necessary. But not all vampires are bad. Some of them chose to be in the world, surrounded by humans. They understood they needed them to survive. They make subjugates and sometimes turned their couples into vampires.

Love is not a common word to vampires. Blood is the most important thing. Blood means power.

Some vampires have 'special' abilities and they got stronger generation by generation. For example, his father has enhanced speed and was stronger than a normal vampire. His mother can feel other people's feelings and emotions and manipulate them in some way. He and his brother inherited both abilities, but the increased speed and strength are stronger on his brother, and the ability to feel emotions is stronger in Hoseok.

Hoseok never understood humans and was never interested in them. That changed when he met you.

You are different. He doesn’t know how to explain. You are like a magnet and he will happily follow you around. He is intrigued. He never met someone who felt as strong as you. He remembers the annoyance and the sadness you felt when you trusted him with your thoughts. It was like the emotions were his. Not even the shield is enough to keep them away from him. He was surprised by the force of them and he found himself wanting to make you feel better. The mission and the reason behind his presence in that ball forgotten since the moment he touched you the first time.

And he wants to see you again.

Dear Ms. Kim ___

Ever since we met, I'm not able to stop thinking about you. I hope this doesn’t seem too presumptuous, but I would like to see you again. I'll take a walk at the park on 5th Avenue this Friday. I'll be honored if you join me.

I'll wait for you at the fountain at 4pm.

JHS

His desk is full of balls of paper and letters stained with ink. It's a mess. He had been writing the same message for the past hour with no good results. He has never sent a message to a beautiful girl before. He is well known inside the Shadow World and women approached him first many times. He is relatively new at this. What he is supposed to write?

His main manservant is with him all the time and he has been laughing at his expense rather than being of any help the entire morning. After an hour or so, he managed to write a decent enough message. He lets out a sigh in satisfaction. The letter seems perfect. He reads it again a couple of times before placing the family seal in one corner and hand it to a servant that will deliver it as soon as possible.

That Friday, Hoseok arrives at the park a little early. He feels a little uneasy, his stomach churning, his palms are sweating and he can not standstill. These sensations are what humans describe as butterflies in their stomachs. Why they enjoyed it so much? It feels awful!

And then you arrive. Looking as gorgeous as the last time he saw you. You are wearing a light blue and pretty day-dress. Four men accompany you, not living your side for a split second. Guards.

His heart may or may not have stopped the moment your face illuminated when you see him.

"I must say, I was surprised by the invitation," you murmur when he was at ear-shot, stretching your gloved arm that he happily receives and kissed in welcoming.

"Would your guards let you take a walk with me?"

You grin.

"So, tell me more about you,” you ask, clutching your arm around his. He can feel the excitement pumping through your veins.

“About me?”

You nod.

“I feel like we only talked about me at my birthday ball. I want to know more about you."

Hoseok remains quiet for a while, pondering on what he could tell you. As you keep walking, the trees start to be closer to each other and the sunlight is slowly fading. The darkness on this part of the park adds a mysterious aura and it is a little chilly. You hug your shawl closer as you wait for his answer.

“I used to live with my parents and older brother. We left Hylia a long time ago, but I wanted to come back. I have good memories of this place. The manor we used to live in is not so far from yours, actually. I've been preparing to take over the… family business. You know, appointments with business associates and clients.”

You hum, “And all your family is a vampire or just you?”

Hoseok chokes on his spit and stops on his tracks. You eye him curiously, a hint of a smile on your lips. You know his secret and you don’t seem to fear him. You were blunt about it and asked him directly. That takes courage. You are not nervous. Not even scared. That confuses him by no means. He can’t tell if that is a good sign or a bad sign.

“What?” you ask, a little impatient because he hasn’t confirmed your suspicions yet. “Do I need to pretend I don’t know what you are?”

Hoseok had three options: one, feign ignorance and take it as a joke (even when he was sure it is not); two, use compulsion to make you forget this day; or three, go with it.

“Since when do you know?”

Yep, he chose the third.

“The day we met,” you confess, leaving Hoseok surprised. If you already knew what he was, why you accepted his invitation? Why not send men to catch him and lock him down? You were not walking anymore but your arms were still clutched together. You don’t seem uncomfortable and your emotions are anything but negative towards him. It is so confusing.

“Can I ask how you figured it out?” He says after a while.

Your eyes narrow. “I don’t if I can trust you. You could be the enemy…”

He is the enemy. At least to your family.

“Yet, you are still here,” he points out with a smile.

He now sensed the uncertainty –and fear?– slowly creeping inside your body. He can hear how rapid your heartbeat is. A part of him is relieved you were having a normal human reaction after all. The other part of him is… disappointed.

“I am not going to hurt you,” he says, wanting to place his hand over yours to assure you but choosing to not doing so.

“I-I know,” you manage to say, eyes glued to the ground to avoid looking at him. “If you wanted to hurt me, you already would have.”

He raises an eyebrow. You are smart. He never doubted it.

He is not proud of what he is about to do, but he has no other choice.

“Come,” he calls and leads you to a bench so you could sit down. You follow his lead without much trouble. As subtle as he can (so you don’t notice your sudden behavior change), he eases your nerves, listening to how your ragged breath slows and how the erratic thump of your heart decreases to normal levels.

“I’ll answer your questions if you answer mine,” he offers. “Deal?”

Then, you finally turn your face to him, “How can I know you would not go and tell our secrets to your vampire friends? We are not entirely hopeless…”

“Fair enough,” he concedes, “I guess you just need to trust me, ___.”

He does what he does best: being charming. It is not a difficult task as allure practically drips from his pores. Being a Pureblood, the allure is twice as strong. He doesn’t need to use compulsion to get what he wanted from a human. At least most of the time. His natural charming personality, incredibly good looks, and vampire-allure aura doesn’t do the trick with you. So, he does a little cheating: he enhances all the good feelings you have for him. Trust, comfortableness, all the emotions that could make you trust him.

It passes several minutes before you take a deep breath, your mind made up.

“Ok,” you agree. You fidget on your seat and chew on your lower lip. Hoseok can sense the uncertainty. It is still there, but not as strong. You take your time. That story had been in your family for generations. It is hard to tell it to someone from outside. Foreign. It is prohibited. You take a deep breath. “My family… Well, specifically my grandfather, formed a group with the sole purpose to eradicate the evil of this world. He was attacked by a vampire and left for dead when he was 20 years old. A warlock saved him. Since then, he decided to study your kind and hunt them down.

“On his studies, my grandfather found something vampires were weak to mountain ash. Since then, my family has built an entire business from it. They created jewelry with it so vampires couldn’t use their mind control on us.

“That day, at my birthday ball, my father sprinkled some mountain ash over the champagne in hopes it would reveal vampires within us.”

Hoseok frowns. That would explain the buzz he felt during that night. Oh, he is in trouble. Humans know way more than they expected. Humans have leverage against his kind. He needs to find out how strong this leverage is.

“Are you wearing a mountain ash necklace right now?”

You nod, “I always wear one.”

He hums. He could use his powers a moment ago just fine. Maybe the amount of ash is not enough to shield you from his powers or it doesn’t work with Purebloods at all. Is he going to reveal that information to you? No. It is not the end of the world. Yet.

“So, how did you notice?” he urges.

“Your eyes. When we were dancing, they turned red. It was just for a second. I thought I was hallucinating. But it happened again when we were on the balcony. My father a long time ago told me that vampires have crimson eyes as the color of the blood that runs inside our veins. That is how you recognize a monster.”

You definitely are smart. “You are something else, Ms. Kim,” he praises and your cheeks feel warm. “If you knew already what I was, why didn’t you tell your father?”

You shrug. “I don’t know. I was curious about your kind. My father always says vampires are bad, but when we met, you had an opportunity to hurt me and you didn’t. Curiosity got the best of me,” you laugh, embarrassed. “It runs in the family.”

Hoseok can’t help but smile. Is it wrong to feel honored because you trusted him enough to come? “To answer your previous question,” he says after a while. “I am a born vampire. All my family is.”

You look at him with wide eyes but there are no signs of fear in them. Only genuine curiosity. “How old are you?”

“I stopped physically aging when I turned 24. I am 215 years old,” he confesses with a tiny grin, watching carefully for your reaction. You do not disappoint. Your eyes bulge out of your orbits and he let out a soft chuckle.

You clear your throat, "That is a lot…"

Hoseok wonders how you would react if he tells you his parents have been alive for over millennia.

"Do you have more questions?" He teases and you pout.

"I have a lot. Can you handle that, Mr. Jung?

"I thought we agreed to call us for our first name, ____." He leans forward, looking directly into your eyes and enjoying how you flush.

“Fine. Do you sleep in covens?”

He lets the loudest laugh you have ever heard of and you do your best to not look beyond offended.

“Is that really your question?”

“Well, excuse me. We don’t know much about your kind and I am sure what we know is wrong,” you pout and his heart flips. He can feel your embarrassment and frustration.

“No, we don’t sleep in covens,” he responds at last.

“Do you sleep at all?”

“Yes, in beds where you can do more than sleeping," he flirts shamelessly.

You ignore him.

“What about mirrors, garlic, and holy water?

“Do you people really believe that?”

You nod and start chuckling because if he put it that way, humans were not that clever. It is the first time he heard you laugh and he is fascinated.

"My bathroom is practically made of mirrors. Garlic is my favorite condiment and Holy water is just… water."

You snort, "See? What we know is all wrong…"

He wants to take your hand, but he knows it won’t be appropriate.

“What about the sun?” you continue. “You are literally under the sunlight and unbothered. Does it affect you at all?"

Hoseok grins, "No."

The rest of the evening you keep asking him all your doubts and he is happy to respond. By the end of the evening, you know more about vampires and the Shadow World than any of your family or the Association.

"I believe I have kept you long enough, Ms. Kim. Your guards are probably worried."

"Oh, dear," you notice for the first time how dark this part of the park is. "Time goes by so fast when I talk to you, Mr. Jung."

And you giggle.

He leads you to your carriage and is funny the look of relief your guards have the moment they see you.

Before you get inside, you turn around. "Will I see you again?"

He nods, "Soon."

You are used to your life. Is all kinds of boring. Every part of your daily life is a routine, a schedule to follow. You can't make decisions concerning yourself by yourself. They always have told you what to do, what to wear… and there were tons of rules on how to walk, stand, eat and talk properly. It is exhausting.

Not everything is bad. You have your brother, Namjoon, Taehyung, and your friends. Their presence made your life easier and a lot more bearable. But they don't always provide the break you needed and craved. They are still part of the world you sometimes hated. They have their own schedules and rules to follow. It somewhat consoled you (and you hated yourself for that) that it seemed their lives were not under their control either. At least you are not totally alone.

The first breath of fresh air was when you first met Taehyung. He was new, funny and so, so charming. He is the first man to notice you. He is different.

And then, you met Jung Hoseok.

He is a vampire. In the words of your father, a monster. He can suck your blood and leave you dry. He can corrupt your soul.

Then, why do you feel more alive since you met him?

With him, you were not Kim ____, the daughter of Lord Kim, with tons of responsibilities to fulfill. With him, you are just ____. A normal girl hanging out with a normal guy. A normal guy who also happened to be a vampire.

And you are in trouble.

Behind closed doors, the members of your family are self-proclaimed vampire hunters. They built a secret association with their ideals. They reunited at least once a month to talk about weapons and the best way to kill vampires. At least that’s what Namjoon told you one day and he refuses to tell you more because you're a woman and you don’t need to know these things.

You may or may not have told him a couple of words that are inappropriate for a young debutante.

“What color of dress would you want for tonight, Mrs. Kim?” Lisa, your lady in waiting, asks as he finishes the last touches on your hair.

Looking yourself in the mirror, you sigh. “I think I’ll go with the blue one, with details in silver.”

Lisa nods and motions the other ladies to bring the dress. It is still inside the box, newly designed for you. 20 minutes later, you are waiting for your family in the hall near the staircase.

The Social Season started a couple of weeks ago and tonight the Lovelace family is throwing their annual ball. All the elite in Hylia has an invitation. A part of you hopes you’ll see Mr. Jung there.

Your brother arrives 5 minutes later.

“Father won’t come with us,” he says, using one of the mirrors on the left wall to adjust his already perfectly styled hair. “He has matters to attend.”

“You mean matters of the Association.”

He turns to you with a tight smile, “Yes. Mother is on her way and we can go.”

“Ok.”

The Lovelace Manor is not that far from yours, so the moment your mother is ready, the ride doesn’t take long. It is still early, but there are already a lot of people in the entranceway. Namjoon leads you inside. All the eyes are on you the moment you enter. You know your brother is handsome. He is. You resist the urge to laugh when almost all the debutantes at the Lovelace ball room break their necks to have at least a glance of your brother. He is a good match. He will be the next Lord Kim. All eyes are on him.

And you? Besides being under Namjoon’s shadow, the pins holding your hair place are stabbing your scalp, you can’t endure standing on those heels any longer and your face hurts from the fake smile you were taught to always wear in public.

But other than that, it can be worse.

“Would you be okay if I leave you for a while? I want to have a dance with Mrs. Lovelace,” your brother questions and he has these sparkly eyes that make it really hard to say no.

“Go.”

He grins, showing his killer dimpled smile. He gives you and your mother a quick peck on the cheek and disappears through the crow, with a couple of eyes still glued to his frame. It seems that Ms. Lovelace is the lucky girl. She is nice. A year older than you. Her family meets all your parent’s standards and she is beautiful. The perfect sister-in-law.

You spot a red-head near the dance floor. You wave your mother goodbye and walk toward your best friend.

She beams at you the moment she recognizes you. She is wearing a white dress with gold details.

"My father wants me to marry that Lightwood kid. Can you believe it?" She says in greeting.

"Joseph? He is cute."

She scoffs, "Please. We grew up together. He is like my brother," she dismisses with a flick of her hand and takes a cup of champagne from one of the trays. "What about you? I heard the date of your wedding with Jeon Yongmin is already set."

You snort, "He hasn't proposed yet. Our parents are still… talking."

"Your wedding is going to be pretty. Big and pretty."

"Shut up."

She giggles. She has the perfect retort ready, a retort that dies on her tongue when someone clears their throat behind you. Joseph Lightwood is standing behind you, with a lopsided smile tinting his lips but he looks a little nervous too.

“Would you join me for this dance, Ms. Carstairs?” He offers his hand.

Despite all her rant and ‘he is like my brother’ thing, she blushes. You gnaw at your lip to avoid the smile. They would look cute together. You observe them walk to the dance floor.

You don’t get to spend much time in solitude after your friend’s departure, as one bachelor asks you to dance too. Mr. Morgenstern (or was it Morgentain?) is a tall man with hair so blonde it is almost white and rigid facial expressions. Like a statue, chiseled by the best artist. He is attractive, but he is not your type of attractive.

When you know the steps like the back of your hand, it is easy to get lost in the dance. You don’t need to put all your attention on it to do it right. You flutter your eyes shut. You get lost in your thoughts. You imagine that the skin of the hand that twirls you around is softer. The shoulders where you place your hand are a little less broad. You can imagine that the man dancing with you is not blonde, but brunette. The eyes crimson as the color of blood…

You open your eyes.

Hoseok is here and he is watching you.

The world stops. You can no longer hear the music. The people around you disappear. It is only you and him. You both stand there, watching each other. He is so captivating. You have the urge to go to him, to touch him but he is so far.

Inhale. Exhale.

Once. Twice. Three times.

The next time you blink, he is closer. Looking at you with his crimson eyes and a tiny smirk on his lips… Are those... fangs?

The world resumes and it is turning upside down. You are falling but before you touch the ground, a pair of arms grab you by the waist.

“Are you okay?” Mr. Morgenstern asks as he helps you on your feet. He looks worried and you offer him a smile.

You are still on the ball. The music is still playing. People are still around you but they stopped dancing. Now, they are watching you.

“Yeah. I guess all the twirling and the champagne are not a good combination,” you laugh awkwardly. "Thank you."

With a smile, he leads you out of the dance floor to a chair. You look around, searching for Hoseok, but you don't see him. Was he a product of your imagination?

"You okay?" Namjoon appears out of nowhere when you sit down.

You nod, "I am just a little dizzy."

There is no point to try to calm your brother. He is already worried.

"I have arranged a room for you if you want to lay down and rest for a bit," Ms. Lovelace is behind him. "You look a little pale…"

You open your mouth to deny the offer because you are fine but before you can say something, Namjoon is grabbing you by the hand and sliding an arm around your waist to help you stand up.

"Come on," he says and there is no room to fight.

He leads you through the ballroom and you want to comment on the fact that he knows his way through the house pretty well. He opens then one of the many doors in the hallway and urges you inside. The room is pretty, with a single bed and a small couch in the corner.

“You can stay here until you feel better,” Namjoon states. “If you feel worse, call me and we will go home.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

With that, he leaves you alone and sends you a smile before closing the door. Once you are alone, you let out a sigh. After some deliberation, you choose to sit on the couch instead of the bed. Your legs feel weak and you are not sure why. You go over the events of the night. Does some vampire use compulsion on you? If so, why you? You are the daughter of the leader of the organization that will fight against vampires, but you don’t know anything. You can’t go to meetings and Namjoon barely tells you anything. You will be no use if they try to use compulsion to get information and you are supposed to be protected by the mountain ash in your necklace. But someone is trying to mess with your mind and is working. Doesn’t the ash work as your family always thought? Does that mean that you don’t have protection against them anymore?

You don’t get to dwell on the matter much longer, because someone is knocking on the door. With a sigh, you stand from the couch and open the door.

You gasp. It’s him. With messy hair and slightly agitated, Jung Hoseok is standing in front of you. To make sure it is really him, you take a step forward and place your open palm against his chest. It feels solid and warm.

“Are you really here? Is it really you?” you ask, in a trance.

“Are you okay? What happened?” he looks concerned and that calms you a little bit.

“Nothing, I…” you start, and then you notice that your hand is still pressing against his chest. You remove it immediately. “I’m sorry.”

He chuckles, dismissing the matter like it's nothing. “May I come in?”

You nod and move from the door.

“Are you feeling better? I saw you faint earlier.”

Your eyes grow wide, “You saw that?”

Then you didn’t imagine it. He was there. You start to giggle, relieved. You are not losing your mind, after all. “I’m fine. My brother exaggerated. I had too much champagne to drink and danced a lot. That’s all.”

He raises his brow, a hint of a smile on his lips. “Are you sure?” Out of nowhere, he takes a step forward and cups your head with both hands. “You still look a little pale…”

He is so close you lose the ability to think, talk, or breathe. His fingertips caress the skin softly. Before you know it, he is pushing you inside the room again and closes the door behind him. All without taking his hands from your face. Your eyes are glued to his. At some point, his eyes stopped being the chocolate color you know, and started to morph into a crimson color. It is both exciting and terrifying. Then, his eyes fall to your lips and your heart jumps.

“What are you doing to me?” he whispers.

You are about to ask him what he means, but suddenly you are knocked off your feet and your body is pressed between his body and the nearest wall.

“You are distracting me. I have a responsibility to my kind. I had a mission and the only thing I can think about is you.” He emphasizes his words with a gentle caress to the skin of your neck, earning a gasp from your lips. He uses one of his arms to hug you by the waist and pull you closer (if that is even possible). "Your scent is intoxicating. Your skin is so tender," he murmurs last words with his lips pressed against your jawline.

Your body feels like it is in overdrive. Every fiber is on fire. He takes his time to worship both sides of your jawline with kisses, licks, and nips. You rest your head against the wall to give him more access. It is clear where he wants to go but he moves slowly, taking his sweet time with you, nibbling at your earlobe and moving through your cheek. He is giving you the time to ask him to stop if that's what you want. But your mind is full of him, full of the feeling of his lips against your skin. You want more.

With his free hand, he raises yours to rest them on his shoulders.

"You are so beautiful," he murmurs. "Can I kiss you?"

You nod and he presses his lips against your own.

There is a moment when everything stills as time stopped. He is allowing you to push him away and when you don’t, he cups your face with his free hand and deepens the kiss. This is new territory for you. You only have kissed a man in your life and it was nothing like this. It was a year ago, with a man you thought you loved. It only lasted a second. It was just a press of lips and nothing more.

This is different.

Hoseok is kissing you with slow, languid strokes, taking his time to savor you. Fingers digging your skin, he presses his body tightly against yours and you hug him, not wanting to let him go. He tastes like champagne and something inherently his. It’s the sweetest thing. He swipes with his tongue your lower lip and you grant him entrance. He explores the crevice of your mouth as a man starved.

You have never felt like this, so overwhelmed and full of emotions you can’t comprehend. He bites your lip and tugs it with his teeth and you gasp in pain. With his tongue, he licks the wound and when the only droplet of blood reaches his taste buds, he groans.

“You taste divine,” he murmurs against your mouth and proceeds to kiss you fiercely, almost bruising. And then, he stops. He rests his forehead on yours as you both regain your breath. “You don’t understand how much I want you, how much I desire you…”

He takes your left hand that is comfortably resting on his shoulder and kisses your knuckles. When your eyes flutter open, it's like a bucket of cold water washes over you. His eyes are crimson red and his fangs are exposed. He is staring at your wrist like it holds all the answers. He is lost in his bloodlust and desire. He leans in, his fangs just mere millimeters away from piercing your skin…

“Stop,” you say and he does. His crimson eyes meet yours and you hold your breath. “Please, don’t.” Your voice is just above a whisper.

The next ten seconds of your life are the longest, but he finally puts your hand down.

“Don’t worry. I promised I wouldn’t hurt you.”

He caresses your cheek with his thumb. If he notices the shiver when he touches your skin, he doesn’t mention it. In a blink, he is on the other side of the room.

“I think we should return to the ball,” he says while arranging his suit. His perfectly styled hair is a mess now and you blush. It’s because of you.

With a nod, you walk to look at yourself in the mirror. You don’t recognize yourself. Cheeks flushed, messy hair and lips swollen. Even your dress is untidy. Now that you are not distracted with Hoseok’s lips on yours, you notice the sting of the pins against your scalp. It takes you a few minutes to look decent again. When you finish, you turn around.

“Do I look okay?” you ask him. He is laying on the couch, with his eyes fixed on you.

“You always look beautiful. Should we go?” he stands from the couch and offers his hand. You hesitate for a few seconds but take it anyway. He leads you out of the room to the ball, where you will dance all night, drink more champagne and have the best night of your life.

Time's perception is something different for vampires than it is for humans. Ten years for vampires are 1 year for humans, and as time goes by, the longer you live the less you care about the simplest things.

Hoseok has traveled all over the world, read thousands and thousands of books, met all kinds of people… and yet, he hasn't fallen in love at least once. He doesn't know how it feels.

He has had partners, yes, but only for feeding or sexual releases. There was not any type of intimacy and he didn't care.

And you?

You are the first human he feels attracted to. You are the first thought he has every morning when he wakes up and the last he thinks when he goes to bed. You are the female lead on every book he reads and he finds himself daydreaming about you all the time. He wonders every day what are you doing or if you are doing okay. All those nights, when he holds you close as you dance all night, are graven inside his mind for all eternity.

It has been a little over a month since the incident at the Lovelace ball. The night when he first tasted your blood. It was just a tiny droplet and still, it drove him mad at how divine it was. But as good as that was, it is still printed in his mind the way you flinched when he touched you after. He almost lost control and you were afraid of him. For the first time in a long time, he felt embarrassed to be a vampire, the monster you and your family proclaimed he was. He didn’t want you to fear him and as selfish and shameful it was, he used his powers again to take your fear away and make you feel better. At first, he was using his powers to get on your good side for the sake of the mission. Now, he wants to be on your good side because he is slowly falling into you.

"Excuse me, my Lord," his main butler interrupted his thoughts. "Mr. Kim is here and wants to talk to you."

One of his favorite books of all time is resting on his lap, but he hasn't been able to concentrate enough to understand a single word, so he closes it.

"Let him in," he replies with a sigh, placing the book on the table as he stood from the couch he was comfortably seated. The butler nods and disappears through the door.

Ten minutes later, Kim Taehyung enters the room.

“Long time no see my friend,” Hoseok greeted him with a smile he didn't return.

“I think we can skip the formalities.”

Hoseok frowns. "Okay, then. What are you doing here?" He walks to his mini bar and places two ice cubes inside two glasses. “Do you want something to drink?” he asks his friend as he pours a dark gold liquid. Maybe a drink will ease his nerves a little.

"No, I am okay. Thank you,” he dismisses with the back of his hand. “I came to ask you to stay away from ____."

“Straight to the point, I see.”

He turns to look at him. His face is impassive, not letting anything slide. He tries to read his emotions with no luck. A long time ago, Taehyung learned how to hide his feelings when he was around him. He hates it so much, especially when he is uncertain of the situation, which only concerns him further.

“Why?” he asks, annoyance slowly growing inside his chest.

“It is best for her not to be caught up in the middle of a war.”

Hoseok downed the content of his glass in one gulp and stared at his friend in confusion. “She is the daughter of the leader of the association. She is already in the middle of it.”

“Yeah, but how do you think her father would react if he knows his daughter is courting with a vampire?”

“He won’t know about…-”

Taehyung snorts. “He is already suspicious and we are this close to getting caught.”

“How do you know?”

Despite his angry exterior, Hoseok can tell Taehyung is really worried. He patiently waits for his friend to continue, seated on the same couch he was before he arrived. Hoseok can feel his mortification. It is faint, but it is there. He watches with amusement how Taehyung approached the bar and poured himself a drink.

“I thought you didn’t want something to drink…”

“After I told you what I know, you’ll want to refill yours,” he says and takes the contents of his glass in one gulp.

Hoseok raises a brow but stays silent. After a few minutes, Taehyung speaks.

“I’ve been using compulsion with servants to figure it out if they know or have heard something about the Lord’s anti-vampire group.”

“And?”

“Werewolves are not their only allies," he confesses. "The Lord managed to find a warlock willing to help them.”

Hoseok frowns. “A warlock? I thought we had a peace treaty with the magic community.”

Everyone thinks being a vampire is full of benefits and perks but they are all wrong. Vampirism brings along a lot of enemies.

Taehyung chuckles dryly. “Theoretically? Yes. But this one is obviously in favor of humans.”

“What would they want with a warlock?”

“Well, they know how to kill us now and that’s not the worst of our problems.”

“What could possibly be worse than that?” Hoseok asks.

“They are trying to empower a human with magic to match our strength and speed during fights,” he gulped loudly and Hoseok’s heart drops.

This couldn’t be happening. Taehyung lets the information sink in and takes another drink. Hoseok rubs his temples with his fingers. That’s definitely bad. Humans had a slim chance to fight against vampires because of their higher number and vampires still had leverage: their power. Now, if humans have powers of their own, vampires are screwed. He is screwed.

“Any results?”

“Not yet.”

Taehyung’s worry was so strong that he couldn’t hide from Hoseok anymore. It was exhausting and the feeling hit Hobi with the force of a truck. Now, his body was full with the worry of two individuals at the same time and his stomach churned painfully.

"I need to inform my father. If humans want to fight, he will fight back."

Taehyung nods, "I know. Now, do you understand why I want you to stay away from her?” his voice sounds hoarse and Hoseok doesn’t remember the last time he saw pain glistening in his friend’s eyes. "Something could go terribly wrong."

Hoseok understands. He knows things are messed up and not for the first time he wishes you were a vampire. Things will be simpler like that.

Would you want that? If he offers you a life of eternity with him by your side, would you take it?

“I can’t,” and the words are like punches to Taehyung's gut. "I don't want to. I will protect her. I want to protect her."

“Do you love her?”

Taehyung closed his eyes as if he feared what his answer might be.

Hoseok never realized until then, too caught inside his own world, fears, and hopes, that Taehyung has feelings for you, too. He couldn’t blame him for it, either. Hoseok himself was falling for you. Fast. You were extraordinary, beautiful and the most selfless person he knew. It was too obvious, actually. The way Taehyung’s face illuminated when you were in the same room as him; or the way his eyes helplessly followed your frame wherever you went.

Taehyung was one of the good ones.

He had never killed a human to feed. Enjoyed surrounding himself with humans because he wanted to be as normal as possible. He didn’t like being a vampire, but he was born like that and couldn’t change that. He took suppressors to weaken his ability to manipulate others' will. His power was so strong he even could use compulsion on other vampires –something no other vampire could do– but he respected the vampiric hierarchy and didn’t want to use it to his convenience.

He is that kind.

"I don't know," Hoseok answers. "I might."

As if he didn’t want to act like a normal human anymore, Taehyung moved in the blink of an eye and seated on the couch, burying his face between his hands in the most vulnerable state Hoseok has ever seen him.

“Hobi, she is human. Mortal. She can die. You understand that, right?” His voice was muffled but to Hoseok's ears was loud and clear.

Of course, he knew that. The last few days, he has been having nightmares. Horrible dreams where you die between his arms, bleeding out. Your blood smearing his hands and clothes as he desperately tried to keep you alive. Every time, he woke up with shallow breathing, his heart hammering furiously against his chest and the biggest lump on his throat. He had never felt that type of agonizing pain in his 200 years of being alive as he felt it at the mere thought of you being ripped off his side…

...and Hoseok is surprised by the nth time by how quickly you managed to get under his skin.

"I know," his voice sounds strained. "I will stay away from her."

Maybe it is for the best. He would hate himself if something happened to you because of him.

Taehyung stands up from the couch with clenched hands, "You better because if something happens to her, I'll personally kill you with my bare hands."

The Jeon's annual party is one of the most important and biggest events of the year during the social season. The invitation made of lush paper and gold is personally delivered to every guest. If you were invited, that meant you are important.

It is also the event Hoseok had chosen to say goodbye to you. He wants to have one last dance and give you a final kiss before he disappeared from your life.

Weird thing but what you loved the most about this world are the parties. Ironic, I know. Those parties are the perfect excuse to display the family fortune and elicit other’s envy. You hate that. No, what you love the most is when the hosts, to impress the guests, order the most exquisite pastries and drinks that make your taste buds tingle in pleasure. You love food.

There are also clothes. Despite yourself, you enjoyed dressing up in those dresses that are made especially for you and getting your hair and makeup done for the occasion. It makes you feel like you are inside a fairytale.

Tonight, your only companion is your brother. Your father had something to do and your mother is kind enough to not come without him.

This time, the Jeon ball had a theme, Fire and Ice, where the gentleman comes in white and the ladies in red. Lisa excelled herself with the makeup and the hair. You look absolutely stunning.

Since you arrived, you made a beeline to the food. Shrimp canapes and diverse seafood in appetizers are displayed before you. You are not a big fan of seafood but the canapes are pretty good. You are about to take your second one when you feel a hand being pressed against your lower back.

"Did my mother choose the appetizers well?”

Jeon Yongmin is behind you with an amused smile on his face.

"O-oh! Mr. Jeon,” half of the canape was already inside your mouth, so you are struggling a little while you swallow it.

"Please," he sends you a boyish smile and hands you a cup with bubbly golden liquid, "I told you to call me Yongmin."

You smile back. “Yongmin,” his name rolls off your tongue and his smile widens.

Well, you guess he will be a good husband. He is kind and attentive. He comes from a wealthy family. You will be taken care of and will not have to worry about anything for your entire life. Plus, he is really handsome. Your kids will be pretty. Yet, you can’t picture yourself with him. When you imagine yourself in the future, another man is standing beside you.

"The appetizers are really good," you finally respond.

Strangely, he is here talking to you. Even when he is around your age, he spent more time hanging out with your brother and his friends than you. Thus, you are not close.

"I'm glad you liked them. My mother was really nervous about it," Yongmin says as he takes one for himself.

"How is the training going?" You ask him and giggle at his confused expression. "My father is the leader and my brother an active member. Of course, I know about your little group of vampire hunters."

“It is weird to talk about it with someone out of the group,” he chuckles nervously and rubs the back of his neck. Then, he leans in closer to you so no one can hear what he is about to say. “We’ve been training with a warlock. He is giving some the power to fight against them. The other night, we went hunting and your brother killed one. It was impressive.”

Your blood runs cold. Namjoon killed a vampire. You stare at Yongmin horrified but he is too busy telling you the epic story of your brother to notice the change in your expression. He seems excited and why not? This is what your family has been looking for: a way to eliminate vampires from the world. You should be happy. Instead, you feel nauseous. You can't help but imagine Hoseok being tortured by Namjoon.

"We may kill some tonight. You can see if you want. I'm sure your father would let you," he adds casually.

What?

"H-how?"

"They added a bigger dose of mountain ash to all the food and champagne. If a bloodsucker comes to the ball, we'll know."

No. You need to tell Hoseok.

"Has it ever occurred to you that not all vampires are bad?"

He turns to look at you, surprised.

"Are you kidding? They only want one thing. Blood. They'll do anything to get it," his tone is stern and you wonder if he has a story with vampires that made him hate them so bad.

For the past few months, you have wondered if he was a vampire, like Hoseok. There is something odd about him. But now you are certain he is not. No one hates his own people that much.

You excuse yourself, telling Yongmin that you need to go to the dresser. You can't be around him any longer. He offers you a smile that you no longer perceive as charming. You start walking as fast as you can. You need to warn Hoseok–

Suddenly, you bump into someone’s chest, too caught up in your thoughts to notice where you were going.

“I am so sorry. I didn’t see you there… Oh, Hoseok.”

All the concerning thoughts vanish from your mind the moment you meet his eyes.

“Ms. Kim,” he greets you with a grin. “You look stunning tonight.”

He takes your hand and kisses your knuckles.

You blush at his words. “Thank you.”

He looks really handsome too. The white of his suit accentuates his dark hair.

Hoseok leans in and whispers against your ear, “Red is my favorite color.”

You try so hard not to react to his words but your heart bumps hysterically inside your chest and you know he can hear it. It is clear by the smirk that tugs the corner of his mouth.

There’s something you need to tell him, but right now you can't remember what it was. Maybe it is not that important. You'll remember later.

At that moment, the string quartet started playing, filling the room with music.

"Can I have this dance?"

With a small bow, he offers his hand. With butterflies flying in your belly, you take his hand.

He tugs you towards the dance floor where more couples are gathering and preparing themselves to dance. The steps come easy to your mind as you place your right hand over his left one and your left hand over his right shoulder. You feel warmth spread across your body as his right hand snaked around your waist and pulled you closer, his cologne filling your nostrils.

Every time you dance with him, the world disappears. It is just you and him. Nothing else matters. You lose track of time. You dance until your legs feel weak and your feet hurt. You dance until your mind is dizzy and your throat is dry. Unbeknownst to both of you, a pair of eyes follow you through the crowd.

The current song finished and a round of applause filled the room as the dancers bowed to their partners.

"I have something to talk about with you," Hoseok says as he draws you out of the dance floor with a playful smile. Giggling, you follow after him.

Then, something really weird happens. Hoseok stumbles over his feet. Hoseok, a vampire with enhanced reflexes, fell to the floor. He groans in pain and you let out a gasp. Something is wrong.

“Are you okay?”

He looks paler than he was just five minutes ago. Almost all the golden glory that distinguished his smooth skin is lost, leaving a pale, almost sick, color behind. But this is not the most shocking thing. His eyes fluttered open, a bright, crimson red has almost overtaken the chocolate brown of his irises.

“Your eyes…” you whisper.

“I don’t feel so good. Please, help me out of here.”

With a nod you help him to his feet, urging one of his arms around your shoulders for support. A small crowd has gathered around you, their eyes observing with interest.

“Is he feeling alright?” a woman, Lady Penhallow, asks.

You offer her a tight smile. “Yes, thank you. He just drank a little too much,” you giggle awkwardly.

You take Hoseok away before she could formulate a reply. You manage to make it out of the ballroom without much trouble, the people around them too busy to notice something out of the ordinary. However, when you arrive in the hallway, someone is waiting for you.

Hoseok’s grip around your shoulders tightens as you recognize the man standing in front of you.

Jeon Yongmin. The same Jeon Jongmin who was also an active member of your father’s Association and knows how to kill a vampire. The same who told you they were using mountain ash to hunt vampires at the ball…

Suddenly, everything comes back to your mind. How could you forget something so important!?

“Is everything alright? What happened?” Yongmin asks, perfectly collected and face inscrutable. His eyes fall to Hoseok’s arm around your frame and he clenches his jaw.

Perfect.

Just perfect.

You open your mouth to give him an answer, but Hoseok beats you.

“Everything is alright, Jeon. I sprained my ankle dancing with her and Ms. Kim is kind enough to help me get into my carrier. Do I need to explain myself further?” To your surprise, Hoseok looks somewhat normal again. His eyes are brown again and he is doing his best to not use you for support to stand on his feet. Hoseok holds Yongmin's stare like he is challenging him to say something. The tension is palpable.

"Okay…" Yongmin says after a while, his eyes glossy. He turns to you. “Come to see me when you finish. I need to speak to you.”

You nod and watch him re-enter the ballroom. What just happened?

The moment Jongmin leaves you two alone, Hoseok sighs in pain, and his body weight falls on your shoulders. He can’t stand on his feet anymore. With all your strength, you lead him towards a small balcony. Hoseok lets himself fall against the nearest bench once the door closes behind you.

“I don’t know what is happening,” he musters between gritted teeth. He looks worse than before, small puffs of air coming out of his lips and beads of sweat all over his face, his hair sticking to his forehead.

"Hoseok, I am so sorry! They put mountain ash on the champagne. They are looking for vampires!"

You run towards him, on the verge of tears.

“But… the mountain ash doesn’t… affect me,” he breathed out. His loss of breath was what concerned you the most.

"Yongmin said they increased the dose."

Hoseok coughs, “Well, that explains it.”

“What does the mountain ash do to you?”

He coughs again and you wince. “It only weakens me. It suppresses my powers and my strength. I wouldn’t be able to defend me if someone attacked me.”

Of course. It is the only way they have to fight against them.

"What can I do? Let me help."

"I just… I just need to recover my energy. I need blood. I have some spare at my manor…"

He makes the attempt to stand up but he is too weak and fails.

"If blood is what it takes, then take mine."

Hoseok raises his head, his wide eyes meeting as if he couldn't believe the words that came out of your mouth. Yeah, you are offering your blood to a vampire. Something you were taught to avoid at all costs. It is something you never imagine yourself doing. But it was Hoseok, a vampire you've been developing feelings for. And now that you put it like that, if you could save his life, you don’t mind at all.

"No, of course not," he quickly dismissed your idea. “I wouldn’t ask that of you.”

“How much time do you think you’ll last like this?”

“I… don’t know…” another cough. “Probably not much longer.”

“Then you need to feed fast. Your manor is not close enough,” you try to reason with him.

"I'm not strong enough to resist the blood lust. I could kill you," he sounds tired.

"You won’t, I trust you.”

He groans.

"Don’t. I don’t even trust myself."

"Hey," you say, taking his head with your hands to make him look at you. He looks… sad.

The chocolate brown of his eyes had faded away almost completely, now a pair of crimson eyes staring at you. It doesn't freak you out as much as it did just moments ago. Now that you understand they were a part of him, it is easy to leave the uneasiness behind.

You press your mouth against his. The kiss is barely a peck but charged with emotion.

"Let me help you."

The last words are practically whispered against his lips. He squeezes his eyes shut. It feels like an eternity passed before he replies...

"Okay. But not here. This place is full of hunters looking for me. It's not safe."

You agree. "Let's go to my place."

"Yeah," he deadpans. "It would be safer in the House of the family that put me in this position in the first place."

You offer him a smile, "We don't have much of a choice, do we?"

He sighs, "I guess not."

---

Helping Hoseok out of the Jeon manor is a challenge itself because of two reasons: one, it is full of guards; two, you need to carry Hoseok’s weight all the way. Still, he managed to act as normal as possible. Once outside, he loses his energy again. His chauffeur looks concerned when you arrive at Hoseok’s carrier and helps you get him inside.

The ride to your manor is quiet. Hoseok doesn’t have enough energy to talk and you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything. He is resting his head on your lap and you gently caress his hair. You are anything but calm. Adrenaline is pumping inside your veins and your palms are sweaty. The ride only lasted 20 minutes. At this time of the night, the road was almost empty. Two maids are waiting for you at the main entrance. They help you take Hoseok inside.

"Hello Sophie," you greet one of them. "Are my parents home?"

She bows at you, "No, miss. They went out a couple of hours ago."

You nod. "I'll take mister Jung to my room. He is not feeling well… Can you prepare us something to eat?"

"Of course, miss." She disappears through the hallway.

You help Hoseok walk towards your room, which is located upstairs on the left-wing. The moment the door is closed behind you a new wave of nervousness washes over you.

"Are you sure you want this?" he asks as you help him to take a sit on your bed. You place your purse on your night table. "I could feed on one of your maids… They would not remember a thing…"

"No, I'm fine.” You reply quickly. For some reason, the idea of him feeding on someone else isn’t appealing. Hoseok, who is practically dying on your bed, dared to smirk. “Now what?”

“Come here.”

His voice suddenly smoother, like honey. You gulp loudly, fidgeting on your spot. You take a step towards him, your heart pumping inside your chest furiously. When you are at his reach, he takes your hand.

“This is your last chance to say no.”

“I-I won’t.”

He hums before tugging you closer with a last spike of energy. With a yelp, you fall over his lap. He caressed the skin of your neck with the tip of his nose and you shudder.

“Hmm, you smell amazing,” he whispers against your neck before sinking his fangs on the flesh.

You gasp and out of instinct, your arms are placed over his shoulders for support. It is not what you have imagined. It definitely hurt. You feel like your skin is burning. You whine and try to push him, but he is too strong. Hoseok’s arms snaked around your middle to pull you tighter against his body. And then you felt the bliss. It was not something you’ve experienced before. The burn fades, leaving a warm feeling behind. You hear yourself humming in content. It is like nothing bad could ever happen in this world. If this is what happiness feels like, you don’t want it to stop…

Your hazy mind merely registered when Hoseok pulled off your neck- You don’t know how, but his lips find yours.

The kiss is gentle and slow, both of you moving your mouth lazily.

You stay like this for what it seems like hours, kissing and nipping until your lips bruised. There is no rush. Both are content just kissing each other’s lips until your lungs hurt due to the lack of oxygen. Hoseok pulls you tighter against his body that earns him a gasp and he takes the opportunity to slide his tongue inside the seam of your lips. Every brush of his lips, every swipe of his tongue is driving you crazy.

He groans in impatience when he tried to make you straddle his lap with your legs around his hips but failed in the process. Your gown was obviously an impediment to do so. You chuckled against his lips.

You lift your dress so you could slot your legs around his hips and straddle him the way he wanted to. He groans in approval and pulls you for another kiss, his hands cupping your face. This time, it was sloppy and more passionate than before, the desire and tension between you growing with each passing second. Tugging his hair, you make him crane his neck so you could kiss him there, nibbling and licking the soft skin.

“What are you doing?” he asks, clearly affected. His hands fall to your hips, fingers digging your skin.

“What do you think I am doing?”

“Ughh, you’ll be the end of me…”

You can’t help but smile at that. When you found the soft spot on his neck, his hands around your hips tightened, causing your body to squeeze harder against his own. You gasp. It is the first time you feel his already hardening member pressing against your clothed core. You rock your hips again, out of curiosity, and a soft moan leaves your lips. It feels so good. You set a rhythm, slow but strong, as you keep exploring the skin of his neck.

Soon, you feel that it is not enough. You need to feel more of him, so you try to take off his jacket but his hands stop you midway.

“Baby,” your heart flutters at the pet name. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“Why?” you whine.

He smiles at your pouty lips. “You are intoxicated with endorphins and you just lost blood. You are not in your right mind to make decisions. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret tomorrow.”

“But I want you.”

“And you’ll have me, tomorrow.”

He brings your face to him to give you a kiss. “Besides, I think you need to sleep,” he says as he looks intently into your eyes

You yawn. Suddenly, you feel very tired and you are having a hard time trying to keep your eyes open.

“I think I should sleep,” you say, agreeing.

He helps you lay in your bed and you sigh. This feels so comfy and soft.

“Don’t leave me,” you mumble.

“Don’t worry, love. I’ll be here when you wake up. We still need to talk.”

You nod, your eyes already closed.

He admires your sleepy form for a few minutes, deciding that maybe is not a bad idea to get some sleep, too. He stands from the bed to leave his jacket on one of the chairs you have around the room.

Then, out of nowhere, his breath hitches in his throat and he's having trouble bringing oxygen to his lungs. His chest hurts again and he starts coughing violently. There is blood in his hands.

What is happening?

He just fed. The mountain ash shouldn’t be affecting him anymore. Then why he feels like shit again?

The energy leaves him completely and he stumbles over the floor.

Then, the sound of the room’s door being opened reaches his ears. Footsteps.

“Well, well, well. What do we have here?” a man’s voice asks.

Hoseok raises his head to look at the newcomer and it shouldn’t be surprising to find your brother, Namjoon, standing before him. No, what is surprising is that Taehyung is standing behind him.

Son of a bitch.

“I took you long enough to find me,” Hoseok says, mockingly.

Namjoon only smiles sardonically. His eyes find your frame lying on your bed and his jaw clenches, the smile disappearing.

“It was not a good move to feed on her, vampire. My sister has mountain ash in her system. We’ve been consuming it every day for the past month.”

Well, that explains a lot. Hoseok looks at Taehyhung but his former friend is avoiding his gaze. Instead, he is looking at you.

Hoseok coughs again and Namjoon is enjoying his suffering a little bit too much.

“Don’t worry. We will take good care of you,” Namjoon informs him. “Gentlemen, get him out of here.”

Two corpulent men enter the room and walk directly towards him. They pull him off the ground and use ropes to tie his hands behind his back. The moment the material touches his skin, he winces. It is probably enchanted with some anti-vampire spell. He doesn’t see the point though. The mountain ash has weakened him enough to keep him docile.

The men tug him out of your bedroom. With the last strength he has, he tries to look at you. But Namjoon is blocking his view. The last thing he sees before the door closes behind him is Taehyung’s bottomless expression and the hem of your dress in the bed. Red, as the color of the blood that ruined everything.

TO BE CONTINUED.

Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think!

#hoseok #jung hoseok #bts scenarios #bts vampire au #bts smut #hoseok smut #bts fanfics #hoseok x reader #taehyung #kim taehyung #taehyung smut #taehyung x reader #story: jamais vu #jvnghxope

87 notes · View notes

aeternallis · 4 years ago

Text

Unpacking the Anti-Sessrin Argument :: Father/Daughter & Grooming

While I was watching AxelBeats’ newest video on the Sessrin discourse, it got me thinking that maybe the reason why the Anti-Sessrin argument even exists in the first place is because Rumiko Takahashi never fully defined Sessrin’s relationship. The audience had different interpretations, of course, but she never explicitly named whatever it is between them.

It sounds like I’m just stating the obvious, but hear me out. It often baffles me whenever the antis describe Sesshoumaru as having raised, essentially “groomed” Rin for the purpose of sexual gratification. I mean—that’s pretty much the definition of “grooming,” isn’t it: to consistently lower a child’s emotional defenses and befriend them, for the purpose of sex.

But in that same vein, the anti-Sessrin argument also claims (at least most of the time) that Sesshoumaru and Rin also had a father/daughter relationship, from the context of the original show.

Which...kinda contradict each other? 😅 If one sees Sessrin’s relationship as that of a wholesome “father/daughter,” the idea of Sesshoumaru “grooming” Rin is negated, isn’t it? Because in the context of the original anime and the subsequent sequel, describing these two characters simultaneously as “father/daughter” and “an older man grooming a child” wouldn’t make any sense, considering the fact that both descriptions have virtually opposite intentions.

It can only be one or the other.

At least in a fictional context, anyway. As I said, it’s always been difficult to pin down Sessrin’s relationship because Takahashi herself had never defined it either. Sesshoumaru’s character arc is hella subtle, considering the fact that he’s not part of the main group and at most, he is a secondary character (but one that definitely makes an impression), if not a minor antagonist in the beginning. Lol

I’ve always been of the opinion that if you’re going to define the relationship of two characters in any piece of fiction, whatever label that may be has to apply to the entire story of said characters. It would be an erroneous flaw to define the relationship of two characters as one thing based on your initial impressions, then another thing entirely just because you don’t like the trajectory of said relationship.

I don’t mean to say that relationships are static; after all, the emotional connections between two characters are always evolving, either for better or worse. That’s what makes a story, and what allows the audience to connect with the characters.

I only meant that the label has to be reflective of the characters’ actions.

After all, Yashahime is considered the sequel to Inuyasha; it acts as a continuation, not a reboot or a separate story of its own. Yes, the focus has shifted to an alternative main cast, but the story is still being told within the framework of the original anime.

Father/Daughter_________

As I said earlier, a lot of antis describe Sessrin as having a father/daughter relationship, but what specific actions did Sessrin perform in the original anime gave off that impression?

From the beginning, Rin has never had expectations of Sesshoumaru as one would expect to have of a daughter to a father. Throughout the original anime, she fends for herself and only relies on Sesshoumaru for protection. In the context of the time period, Rin receives no form of dowry from him, she’s not used as any sort of pawn (political or otherwise) to his advantage at any time, and for the most part, has no right to whatever assets he may own as an heir (in this case, Jaken’s services and Ah-Un’s loyalty). Sesshoumaru instructs (forces) Jaken and Ah-Un to care for Rin, but I highly doubt the latter has the right to command them, were she truly perceived to be an adopted daughter to a youkai.

For example, in episode 162 of the anime, Rin herself acknowledges that she doesn’t know what role she plays in Sesshoumaru’s life. For some context, there’s a scene in the episode where Jaken explains that in the future after the situation with Naraku is settled, Sesshoumaru will most likely build an empire. In this future empire Jaken envisions, he proclaims that he’ll be a chief minister, so Rin asks the following question:

In this scene, it clearly shows that Rin has no expectations of Sesshoumaru as one would have as a perceived daughter to a father.

Conversely, Sesshoumaru doesn’t give Rin any rights as a daughter would rightfully have from a father. Rin isn’t overprotectively cloistered away in a palace (or in Towa/Setsuna’s case, within a barrier that surrounds a beautiful forest), he does not pass on any sort of inheritance to her (unlike, once again, Towa/Setsuna’s case, in which they both inherited his powers), does not actively tell her of his singular interest in pursuing Naraku, and most of the time, remains emotionally distant from her.

And to repeat that, emotionally distant, but it doesn’t mean that he’s not affected by her kindness.

In the end, she’s free to roam around with him as she pleases--or leave his side, as she pleases. She doesn’t have the restrictions or expectations that would be placed upon a female of that time period; Sesshoumaru lets her live her life, as she pleases.

Grooming _________

On the other end of the spectrum, I ask once more: what specific actions did Sessrin perform in the original anime that gave off that impression?

And before one begins to even think about that question, please note that using the reason “in Yashahime, Sesshoumaru married Rin and they had children” as the specific action would not make any sense; this action is just an end result, but nowhere does it indicate where or how the perceived grooming took place.

To reiterate, throughout the original anime Sesshoumaru remained emotionally distant from Rin; his main focus for most of the time was trying to take Tetsusaiga, tracking down Naraku, and/or trying to find a weapon that can match/surpass Tetsusaiga.

Hell, even in one of their first significant moments together when he brings her back to life that first time, it wasn’t for any reason of trying to obtain sexual gratification from Rin; the audience is fully aware that he was just mostly out to test Tenseiga’s power (as Jaken himself reiterates). Mauledtodeath!Rin just happened to be there as a stroke of luck and an opportunity.

What limited scenes they did have together were brief (not to mention that he ignored her half the time), and with hardly any insight into Sesshoumaru’s thoughts, this argument is very much a moot point.

To be honest, the “grooming” argument IMO is actually kind of ironic, yknow? XD A lot if not most of the antis hate the Sessrin shippers because they think that we condone pedophilia and grooming...yet they were the ones to reach this conclusion on their own. They’re the ones imagining a Sesshoumaru who only had dirty thoughts towards Rin, who raised her to be his outlet for sexual gratification. Lol

Either way, the situation is funny in that context!

My Conclusion _________

So what does all this mean? Nothing much, only that I still don’t really understand where the father/daughter vibe and grooming thing comes from. Lol When I say I never saw those things in the original anime, I meant it. If one were to think about the context of the story and how it was portrayed, the accusations that are stacked against Sessrin are just assumptions based on one singular fact that Sesshoumaru married Rin and had children with her.

To me personally, the one label that defines the relationship between Sesshoumaru and Rin, the one that makes sense if we were to look at Inuyasha and Yashahime as a continuous narrative, is that of lord and vassal.

In an interview with Yashahime’s staff (wonderfully translated by ayuuria here), the producer Naka Toshikazu stated that it was a challenge trying to continue Inuyasha’s story because of how Rumiko Takahashi so neatly concluded it. They only had direction to go somewhere with a new story when they realized they could make it about Sesshoumaru’s daughter.

And it makes sense, doesn’t it? After all, the reason why they couldn’t just pursue Inukag or MiroSan’s story is because those relationships had already been defined. Both are two sets of characters who fell in love whilst they went on an adventure, and they’ve done their part to save the world.

Would a story about Shippo or Jaken or Koga have pulled audiences as much as the main cast did? Where would the conflict come from? How could they continue the story without having to repeat the original narrative? Without having to create a new Naraku?

It makes sense that Sesshoumaru and Rin would get together, if only because they were the one relationship that Rumiko has never defined, not in the anime nor in the manga. Zero in episode 15 of Yashahime states, “The Lord Sesshoumaru, one who is known to detest both humans and half-demons, has taken a human for a wife.”

Just think of how bold of a story that is, one that can match the stakes of the original story, whilst still being able to continue within the frame of the narrative? Think of the implications of what that means in the narrative of Inuyasha, that the one character who arguably hates humans the most, feared and respected by other youkai, went through such a character arc that he would marry a member of a species he claimed to hate and sire children with her.

Of course there would be repercussions; of course other demons wouldn’t be happy or be easily accepting of it, Shikon jewel prophecy be damned.

Of course Sesshoumaru has to work hard to earn his complete happy ending with his family. He fell in love with Rin, a human woman, after all. And in the story of Inuyasha, has that not always been the catalyst for everything else?

#Sessrin #hanyou no yashahime #hanyo no yashahime #anti-sessrin #something to think about #meta #ramble #hanyou no yashahime: sengoku otogizoushi #Yashahime

91 notes · View notes

robininthelabyrinth · 4 years ago

Note

Thank you "Worthwhile Trade". The idea of Baxia turning into an guai is so interesting. I liked imagining the part where she hit NMJ for his idiocy. My brain is projecting "married couple" vibes, omg. I admit despite how weird WWX spoke about the events, the time travel part flew over my head until the tags spelled it out for me. (TBC)

(Cont'd) Also... did NMJ mean it in THAT dual-thing way when talking WRH's prefs? And the last part, where WWX used resentful energy to sub NMJ's qi. I assume he can still cultivate since his core's still there, if emptied? But I wonder what'll happen to his energy once restored Can't help but think his renewed qi will inevitably be affected by the traces of the previous energy that once circulated. He's not going to become a walking stygian tiger or something, is he? Off the wall guess, sorry!

----

sequel to Worthwhile Trade (ao3), also on tumblr

Wei Wuxian didn’t understand Nie Mingjue.

He didn’t understand the way he thought, the way he acted – the way he smiled when he woke up, the way he opened his arms when Nie Huaisang threw himself into them with a wail and said, “It was worth it for you, didi; it always is if it’s for you. Don’t you know that?” the way Wei Wuxian had always shamefully thought of saying, as if something like that could just be said like that, out in the open.

The way Nie Mingjue shrugged when the doctors said his cultivation would likely never recover, that he should have died, that they didn’t understand why he hadn’t; the way he said, seeming even satisfied, that it was a worthwhile trade.

It’s not a trade, Wei Wuxian wanted to scream at him. It’s a sacrifice! It hurts and you’re sad, no, worse, you’re resentful about it and you shouldn’t be because it was your choice, your decision, but you see someone else with everything that you worked so hard for and you’re angry when you shouldn’t be angry and you feel bad and you turn away; it hurts them when you do and you’re glad, you miserable thing, you’re happy that they’re hurt because why should you be the only one whose hurt –

Perhaps the problem wasn’t that he didn’t understand Nie Mingjue.

Perhaps it was only that he saw in Nie Mingjue his own faults, his own deficiencies, the ones he’d tried so hard to hide in the sea of his poor memory.

“You’ll die if you don’t find a way to cultivate,” he said instead, hovering by the door. He’d say that he didn’t mean to ruin the mood, but he kind of did, and Baxia’s eyes on him were cold as if she knew.

As if she knew everything.

How he’d gone back to the past, how he’d changed things, how it was his fault that Nie Mingjue – who’d never done a single thing to hurt him, who’d been upright and righteous and good and whose brother loved him enough to –

Wei Wuxian had made a point of avoiding Baxia.

Not that she was that easy to avoid. She was tall for a woman – not as tall as Nie Mingjue, but proportionate to him in the sense that she was as much taller than the average woman as he was taller than the average man – and she walked as though people should flee before her, a tread that only felt heavy because of the almost visceral rage that surrounded her like a cloud.

Nie Huaisang had found robes for her, somehow, and they were the least feminine robes Wei Wuxian had ever seen a woman wear, though he supposed he still hadn’t seen that given that Baxia wasn’t exactly a woman. Cut in a martial style, a dark shimmering grey that seemed in some lights to be almost red – she had been born as a human in a mantle of blood and she would not let anyone forget it.

“I should have died already,” Nie Mingjue said, as if the world’s scariest guai didn’t have her hand on his shoulder right next to his vulnerable neck. “You came up with a solution, Wei-gongzi, and for that I thank you. Even if we are not able to solve the next stage, being able to see my loved ones is worthwhile.”

Wei Wuxian could learn to hate that word.

“I have a solution, of a sort,” he said, irritated and not entirely because his reveal had been preempted. He’d hoped to sort of ease into it, somehow. “You lack the capacity for regular cultivation, but that doesn’t mean you can’t use demonic cultivation.”

“What? No, we can’t do that,” Nie Huaisang said, biting his fingers anxiously. “Anyway, doesn’t demonic cultivation harm the temperament?”

“You mean my temperament can get worse?” Nie Mingjue teased, and Nie Huaisang smacked him so lightly that it didn’t even displace his clothing. “I don’t know any means of demonic cultivation, Wei-gongzi –”

“Call me Wei Wuxian,” Wei Wuxian said. “Please.”

“Wei Wuxian, then,” Nie Mingjue said. “All the methods I’ve ever heard of were forbidden for very good reasons – but perhaps those conditions are not the same in the method you know.”

Wei Wuxian tensed. “How do you know that I know one?”

“You saved me, didn’t you?” Nie Mingjue said practically, and well, yes, Wei Wuxian supposed he had a point – “And anyway, Baxia can tell.”

Wei Wuxian shivered. “I don’t use it,” he argued. “How can she tell?”

At Nie Huaisang’s instigation, Baxia had recently started experimenting with smiles. She put one on her face now.

It was terrifying.

“Tell me about it,” Nie Mingjue requested. “The powers and the price, all of it.”

“You’re actually considering this?” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “But da-ge…!”

“Wei Wuxian was not wrong when he said that I would die if I didn’t find a way to cultivate despite having given up what I have,” Nie Mingjue said. “If I die, what will you do?”

Oh, not much, just become a mastermind capable of puppeting the entire cultivation world to enact revenge for your death. Nothing big.

“But – da-ge has always put such a priority on remaining on the righteous path…”

“That’s why I asked about the costs,” Nie Mingjue said patiently. “I will not abandon righteousness simply because I adopt a new method of cultivating.”

“Everyone will revile you even if you are righteous,” Wei Wuxian warned him.

Nie Mingjue shrugged. “Who is everyone? What do I care for them? You do the right thing because it is right, not for the sake of fame.”

Wei Wuxian had once thought the same.

“If everyone in the cultivation world thinks you are evil, they will paint you as evil no matter what you do,” he insisted. “No matter how righteous your motives –”

“Let them think he’s evil, then!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “He could be the most black-hearted cultivator in the land, but he’s still my da-ge; my Nie sect and I will protect him!”

“Huaisang! No! That is not how righteousness works – if I ever truly become evil, you are to cut me off at once, kill me if necessary –”

“No way!”

“Huaisang – Baxia, tell him; evil cannot be endured –”

Baxia was looking at her fingernails. She’d picked that gesture up from Sect Leader Ouyang, when he was trying to be pointed about ignoring someone; it was extremely irritating to absolutely everyone who wanted to know who she was and what she was doing here and Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian had teamed up to convince her to keep doing it.

Possibly a mistake, in retrospect.

“Baxia. I know you agree with me on this. Evil is evil, and must be eradicated no matter who it may be.”

She gave him an unimpressed look.

“I know I’m not evil yet,” Nie Mingjue argued, apparently understanding her without any difficulty whatsoever. He’d just woken up from a month-long coma and he could already speak fluent human-saber, it was really unfair. And this man had succumbed to Jin Guangyao’s wiles? Lan Xichen had more to answer for than he knew. “But if I ever become evil – what? No, we will not burn that bridge when we come to it, that’s not even the right idiom, who is teaching you these things –”

Nie Huaisang coughed and hid his face behind a fan.

Wei Wuxian was not going to laugh.

Nie Mingjue growled at them all and turned back to Wei Wuxian. “Explain,” he demanded. “The rest of you, out.”

“But –”

“Out. One of us has to cultivate the righteous path, and if it can’t be me, it has to be you. Baxia?”

She picked Nie Huaisang up by his collar, for all the world like a mother dog picking up her pup by the scruff of its neck, and walked out.

Nie Mingjue picked up demonic cultivation faster than anyone else Wei Wuxian had ever met or even heard of. He wasn’t sure if that demonstrated an unnerving aptitude or if it was simply that Nie Mingjue was surpassingly talented – Wei Wuxian had never met anyone like himself before, someone for whom all things came easy, and it was an unexpected delight to meet a kindred soul somewhere where he’d long ago given up hope. He’d never planned to unveil demonic cultivation in this life unless he truly needed it – he didn’t want to hurt his Lan Zhan the way he had in his first life, and anyway Jiang Cheng and Uncle Jiang and Madame Yu were all alive, with hundreds of Jiang sect members to boot, there was no need for his sacrifice – but the part of him that was more researcher and inventor than cultivator luxuriated in their discussions.

Nie Mingjue was a lot more concerned than Wei Wuxian had ever been with consequences, and how to mitigate them, but he supposed that made sense: losing his cultivation hadn’t impacted that Nie temper one bit, and demonic cultivation was likely to make things worse. Moreover, Nie Mingjue was simply who he was, stiff and unbending, as much steel in his spine as in Baxia’s; he could almost be described as being rigid in his thinking except for the fact that he was in fact seriously considering becoming a demonic cultivator.

“We’re saber cultivators,” Nie Mingjue said when Wei Wuxian tentatively brought it up. “Like a saber, our nature is to be firm and unyielding, not flexible like the sword, but we cannot allow ourselves to become too rigid – a too-rigid saber will break upon encountering an obstacle. It’s a difficult balance to keep, and one made more difficult by our cultivation style.”

“The demonic cultivation aspects, you mean? Using yao to refine your saber spirit?”

“One day, though not today, I’m going to ask you how you know about that,” Nie Mingjue remarked, and although his tone was causal Wei Wuxian’s back went cold. “And I’ll expect you to tell me the truth when I do. But not today. Anyway, yes, that’s what I mean. Do you know what they mean when they say that demonic cultivation harms the temperament?”

Wei Wuxian hesitated. “I assume you’re going to tell me something other than ‘it drives you crazy and makes you kill people’?”

Nie Mingjue snorted. “Sometimes I wonder how someone as smart as you got sent home before you finished your lessons at the Cloud Recesses, but other times it’s fairly obvious.”

Wei Wuxian shrugged, embarrassed.

“Do you really not know?”

“No one taught this to me,” Wei Wuxian said, stung. “I came up with it on my own. How would I know?”

“All demonic cultivation has the same root,” Nie Mingjue said. “Obsession.”

“With killing, yeah, I know, I’ve heard it a million times –”

“Shut up and listen, you impertinent brat. The killing comes later. It starts with obsession. Obsession with righteousness, obsession with love, obsession with the pleasures of this world, with power – a human becomes a demon when they cannot overcome the obsessions within their heart, and the obsession consumes them. In time, a demonic cultivator who is obsessed with power will do whatever it takes to obtain that power, and not mind the blood shed to do it; a demonic cultivator who is obsessed with love will kill everyone who they perceive stands between them and their love, a demonic cultivator who is obsessed with righteousness will turn to murder when in their judgment something that ought to be condemned goes unpunished…”

“What about one who only wants what’s best for his family?” Wei Wuxian said, and he did not know if the challenge in his voice was about Nie Mingjue’s future or his own past.

Nie Mingjue shrugged. “Two roads that I can see: first, their family turns away from them for what they have become and they become vicious with the abandonment, becoming quick to lash out against the world and eventually doing something that causes the world to turn against them. Second, their family stands by them, and eventually the world causes some harm to them – and the demonic cultivator turns to madness in revenge.”

“Not exactly an optimistic outlook.”

“Not especially, no.”

“You don’t seem as concerned by that as I would have thought.”

Nie Mingjue’s lips twitched. “I have a solution.”

“Would you like to share?”

“Using resentful energy to cultivate our sabers makes them prone to obsession, driving them ceaselessly to fight evil, destroy it, without discrimination. It makes them stronger, but also more dangerous – and that is why they must be carefully controlled.”

Wei Wuxian frowned. “So, what? You’re going to be the saber now? Under whose control?”

“Huaisang’s, of course,” Nie Mingjue said, as if it were obvious. “For better or for worse, he is sect leader now. Who else would it be?”

“But – what if you disagree? What if he wants to do things one way, and you another –”

“Then I argue and probably yell a lot, and if in the end he still insists on doing things his way, I listen,” Nie Mingjue said dryly. “That’s how hierarchy works. Isn’t it the same for you? When your shidi, Jiang Cheng, becomes sect leader, you’ll need to listen to him – or leave the sect. There’s no middle ground.”

Wei Wuxian scowled.

“A sect leader that can’t control his disciples is worse than a demonic cultivator,” Nie Mingjue said. “He’s weak. A target, ripe to be ripped apart and devoured by other sects – resources raided, disciples poached, responsibilities taken away...It’s not a fate I would wish on anyone. If you can’t commit to obeying, commit to leaving so that you don’t end up promising more than you can give.”

Ouch.

Just – ouch.

Great advice, fantastic advice, world-class advice, and totally useless because Jiang Cheng had travelled back in time with him and was therefore convinced that Wei Wuxian was just looking for the first way out of the Jiang sect he could find, no matter what Wei Wuxian said or did about it.

(Even Madame Yu was concerned by the new coldness in their relationship and had tried to talk to him about it, which – Wei Wuxian didn’t know what to do with that. It didn’t match any of what he had thought he’d understood.)

He decided to focus back in on the demonic cultivation lessons, shifting from theoretical discussions to the practical, and that, unfortunately, was when they encountered an issue.

“What do you mean you can’t play an instrument?” Wei Wuxian demanded, appalled. “It’s one of the Six Arts! Everyone can play some sort of instrument – even Nie Huaisang plays an instrument!”

“Everyone agreed it was better that I stop learning,” Nie Mingjue said defensively. “It’s all just plucking on strings or blowing air in pipes, and yet no matter that I did exactly what the teacher said to do, it never worked, that’s all.”

“Didn’t Zewu-jun offer to teach you…?”

“He did. And then he said it would be better if we stopped, too.”

The reason, Wei Wuxian soon learned, was that Nie Mingjue was almost completely tone deaf, and the only reason it was almost was that he was still capable of differentiating speech.

“I agree with the majority,” he said after an extremely frustrating day. “Stop. Never pick up an instrument ever again. And don’t let anyone but Zewu-jun play something especially for you, either, okay? Even if they’re highly recommended.”

“An interesting request,” Nie Mingjue said, eyebrows arched skeptically. “May I ask why?”

“Because you’ll have no idea if they’ve changed the music on you,” Wei Wuxian said bluntly. A great deal about the man’s murder in a different life made sense now, and Jin Guangyao’s brilliance in hiding the score of Turmoil inside of Clarity was a little less impressive when played to a man who thought all music, without exception, was just plucking strings or blowing air. “Musical cultivation is deadly in the right hands, especially if you lower your defenses against it. Just consider it a precaution.”

Nie Mingjue’s eyebrows remained arched, but he hummed in agreement.

“I guess we’ll have to think of a new way for you to cultivate demonic cultivation,” Wei Wuxian said, rubbing his face. He had not been planning on having to invent demonic cultivation at all in this life, and now he needed to not only ‘invent’ the original but actually come up with something new. Why was his life so hard? “How did you previously manipulate external energy?”

“With Baxia.”

“Well, that’s not helpful, is it? You can’t wield a human being. Perhaps another saber…?”

That didn’t work, primarily because it turned out that Baxia had strong feelings about Nie Mingjue even thinking about using another saber and well, as far as Wei Wuxian was concerned, whatever Baxia wanted, Baxia got.

(Nie Huaisang had had to go to Heijan once, with Wei Wuxian and Baxia accompanying him since Nie Mingjue wasn’t ready yet, and some unlucky Wen captain had tried to ambush them. That captain, and his squad, were not granted the courtesy of an intact corpse, and Baxia hadn’t even gotten a speck of blood on her nice new robes – no, Wei Wuxian would not be crossing Baxia any time soon.)

“There’s got to be something,” Wei Wuxian said, and Nie Mingjue agreed, and in the end they found something.

Nie Mingjue had been absent-mindedly playing around with one of Nie Huaisang’s fans when one of the fierce corpses Wei Wuxian had raised as practice targets had gotten loose; instinct had taken over and Nie Mingjue had lashed out with the weapon at hand as if it were a saber, and the resentful energy had surged in response –

Baxia was apparently not threatened by the notion of her master using a fan as a weapon, not even one inlaid with steel and heavy cloth with enough layers to catch a sword in.

(If Wei Wuxian needed to go have some time to himself at the sight of Nie Huaisang, dressed as a sect leader with his saber always at his side, standing next to Nie Mingjue holding a fan – well, that was his problem, and also one he intended to show to Jiang Cheng at the next possible opportunity. Someone else deserved to have their mind wrecked by the incongruity as much as he had.)

Even without the weirdness of Nie Mingjue, it was more than a little odd to see Nie Huaisang in the robes of a sect leader without him acting like the Head-shaker. The shock of having to become sect leader had fallen heavily on him: he had become a little more serious, a little more earnest (though still a bit frivolous); he was more inclined to listen and think things over, less inclined to run away.

“If da-ge is going to become a demonic cultivator, someone needs to stand behind him,” Nie Huaisang said simply when Wei Wuxian had tried probing. “He’s always held the world up for me – it’s the least I can do for him. I may not be able to do much, I might be terrible at it, but I owe it to him to at least try.”

Wei Wuxian wondered, sometimes, if Jiang Cheng would have stood up for him if only he had trusted in him, believed in him, the way Nie Mingjue believed in his notoriously useless little brother.

Maybe he’d ask, when he went back to the Jiang sect.

Maybe he’d –

“What the fuck is wrong with you,” Jiang Cheng said as a greeting, and for once Uncle Jiang didn’t disagree. “All those letters and you never once mentioned the terrors?”

“The what,” Wei Wuxian said, and that was how he learned that while he was on his way back to Yunmeng neither Baxia nor Nie Mingjue had wasted any time utilizing their newfound skills out on the battlefield.

Nie Huaisang was never going to be a particularly respected sect leader, especially by those that had met him beforehand, but evidently that wasn’t really important given that he was constantly flanked by what was being called the two terrors of Qinghe.

Nie Mingjue preferred darker colors now that he was no longer sect leader, the same dark grey shading towards black that Baxia had selected for herself, and the selection somehow made him seem even taller, verging on inhuman, and Baxia standing beside him, her human features patterned roughly after his, made the two of them appear a matched set. Nie Mingjue wielded the fan that Wei Wuxian had helped him design, which he had forged with his own hands out of the metal from the Xuanwu’s cave that Wei Wuxian had foolishly figured someone ought to get some use out of, painted over with a cinnabar array in Nie Huaisang’s careful brushstrokes, and in his hands it was both weapon and conduit for the raising of armies of corpses. Baxia, for her part, held nothing but required nothing, a sweeping gesture of her hand more devastating than a dozen blows with the saber.

They were terrifying, a nightmare writ large and unmistakably dangerous, undeniably demonic cultivators in a way that was entirely different from Wei Wuxian’s own dramatics, and it unnerved the rest of the cultivation world the way Wei Wuxian had feared it would.

“It won’t be a problem,” Jiang Cheng said impatiently. “The Nie sect are ascending in strength, and this only adds to their mystique – who would challenge them?”

“Uh, Jin Guangshan,” Wei Wuxian said. “Like last time?”

Jiang Cheng huffed. “At this rate, I don’t even think Jin Guangyao will bother defecting to the Jin sect,” he said. “Not if he knows how to play his cards right. The Nie sect’s strength in the original version was never about Chifeng-zun’s skill with the blade alone. It was the whole sect’s strength, with Chifeng-zun’s ability to wield them as skillfully as he did his saber; he’s an outstanding general. And now they have him as a general, him as a demonic cultivator, and whatever the fuck is going on with Lady Baxia –”

“I already told you. She’s a guai.”

“Like I already told you, it doesn’t matter how many times you say that, I will immediately expel the knowledge from my mind and you should too. ‘Immortal cultivator cousin that my brother named his saber after’, like what Nie Huaisang has been putting about, is a perfectly acceptable cover story.”

“And the fact that his saber disappeared at the same time?”

“Coincidence,” Jiang Cheng said firmly. “And we’re sticking with that. Anyway, the point is that if you’re an ambitious man, the Nie sect is the place to be right now and probably will continue to be in the future. This is going to be evident to both Jin Guangshan and the future Jin Guangyao, and we’ll need to deal with that.”

“I’ll keep an eye out,” Wei Wuxian promised. “After rescuing Chifeng-zun and helping with the demonic cultivation, I’ve gotten pretty close to them.”

“Mm. And how about your other mission?”

Wei Wuxian scowled at the smirk on Jiang Cheng’s face. “You know perfectly well that I haven’t had any time to seduce Lan Wangji, what with how busy I’ve been. I don’t even know for sure if he likes me yet -!”

“You’re an idiot, he does, and you’re not allowed to keep us all in suspense for two decades this time. Figure it out.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I’m sticking you with the job of being an information courier and you leave for the Lan sect front line tomorrow.”

“You are the best shidi ever,” Wei Wuxian said, and meant it.

Jiang Cheng huffed. “Yeah, well,” he said as if his cheeks weren’t red. “Remember that in the future. In this life we’re the Twin Heroes, you hear me? No take-backs.”

Nie Mingjue was right: Wei Wuxian would need to either learn to obey or tell Jiang Cheng early on that he was leaving, and walking a path in the middle would only cause heartbreak all over again.

“Okay,” he said, deciding to ask Lan Wangji for advice on obedience. Surely that was something that could be learned? “Deal. You do know that that means Lan Wangji’s going to have to marry in, right?”

“Oh no,” Jiang Cheng said, voice entirely flat. “How terrible. I’ll find a way to manage dealing with that ice block somehow…listen, I don’t care if you end up calling him Wei Sizhui in this life, but don’t ruin his character. He was perfectly nice.”

“I don’t know if he’s even been born yet,” Wei Wuxian said glumly. “I’ve been looking, but…”

“I’ve asked some of Mother’s spies to keep track of Wen Ning and Wen Qing,” Jiang Cheng said. “Collecting evidence we’ll need for their inevitable post-war trial, assuming we want them to live better lives than just refugees. Give it time, we’ll find him.”

“Now I just need to see if Lan Wangji will want to raise children with me…”

“Wei Wuxian. I don’t care. Go.”

#mdzs #nie mingjue #wei wuxian #nie huaisang #baxia #jiang cheng #my fic #my fics #academic discussion of demonic cultivation #this isn't an answer to your question but I hope you like it anyway #tkpartisan

281 notes · View notes