#anyway. i hate everyone goodnight
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watched a really fun stream and instead of going to bed like i should have i suddendly wanted to doodle demise and hylia like my life depended on it so heres a quick past 1am doodle that i might regret posting when i wake up tomorrow ._.
#ganondoodles#zelda#art#tloz#demise#hylia#i am .. so tired#shitty sleep depreived doodles is surely what everyone wants to see lmao#not meant as hate for myself but like#when im really tired i tend to draw not well and can only see it after i got sleep ndfjkgnfjkngvjkld#............also took pain killers so thats that#anyway goodnight
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the 1 is back | suzuka 2023
#he took singapore PERSONALLY#it is over for everyone#max verstappen#f1#formula 1#op#anyway it is 3:30 am. love this track hate these times. goodnight. glad i got to see max serve!
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↖️ it became unwell thinking about calliope and caduceus again . that one like 6 minute conversation in ep 130 . deeply unwell from it . when caduceus told calliope: "I don't think I'm coming back. And I'm not okay with it, but I'm making peace with it. If there's a way for my body to get back here, I'd be very grateful, but there's every possibility that that won't happen. I'd like my name somewhere if I'm-- if there's nothing to bring back. That would be a comfort." and also "And I want you to take care of everybody. And especially, I want to make sure you take care of yourself, and don't, don't get locked up here on my account. Your job is to get everyone situated and then make sure that you find whatever destiny you're supposed to have. I don't think you're supposed to be here. Not forever."
#the destruction that did to my emotional wellbeing#kiddo say#rattling bars at how little interaction there was between them because i love the dynamic so much . such deep understanding and trust#but just like. that little hint of resentment . but also solidarity#in that they need to do their roles to take care of everyone else. and they both kind of hate that the other got to leave (first calliope#and then caduceus saved them) and that wasnt meant to be their roles so they dont know how to feel#and caduceus wants to stay home and he wants to leave and he wants to make sure calliope can leave but he doesnt know if he'll#come back so that she can . and i just . dies.#i did a drawing i rly like of them . and maybe ill listen to my playlist .#ok anyway goodnight
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im sorry . im so sorry .
please forgive me for this .
i love you .
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T W : blood below .
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i knew we could never stay together in such a world as this, but im sorry i led you on . lying to you with sweetened and honeyed words and poisoned promises that we could and would always stay together .
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( solei : @solei-eclipse )
#alien stage ocs#alnst ocs#alnst oc: solei#alnst oc: aurien#yuppie she’s talking to solei in this !#anyways#im going to sleep now .#its nearly 1 in my time zone and i already was staying up late to do this last minute . .#i also feel kinda like crap because of some stuff from this week#this thing also turned out waay worst then i expected it and i already hate it#but#goodnight everyone !#solauri
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btw im not an ocon hater i quite like him actually (hes funny and i cant wait to see him and his vehicular manslaughter kinda ways in the ticking time bomb that is a haas) but taking the fastest lap from franquito... unforgivable
#i was like the fastest lap is fun the fia hates fun we should keep it#but now im like take it actually kill it!#absolute slay from the little guy tho 🥰#anyway goodnight! at last thanks to everyone who tuned in for the liveblog#cause i dont think i will do mexico ill be away 😭#hazel.txt#f1
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Back to the grind tomorrow and lemme tell you what, while I do really enjoy tumblr I sure did like not having to be Online all the time during our break.. And I've been thinking that the amount I'm Online and Available will probably be much lower this year compared to the past. So if I'm not responding to asks as fast or posting as much or w/e, that's why! Thanks for understanding 🙏
#also i DO NOT enjoy twitter/X and truly loved not needing to check it at all really over the break#i might drop twitter altogether because i hate being on there#i'm kinda afraid it'll affect my shop's traffic somewhat significantly buttttt maybe that's worth not having to be there#we'll see..#2024 is gonna be a year of shedding stuff left and right i already know it#sorry to anyone not in the US for already cutting off international orders#twitter you're next#after that who knows#maybe i'll stop carrying my smartphone because i also loved not having to look at it while we were closed#i miss having a flip phone that couldn't even text that thing never bothered me#step one with that tho is i've already turned off notifications from pretty much every app#but now when i open the apps they bother me relentlessly to turn notifications on which i will not do#anyway#maybe i'm just getting old#rant over#goodnight everyone#see you at the drop tomorrow
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mini rant under cut, warning for cursing.
how many more times does someone close to me have to traumatize me before it stops. how many more times. I am sick of this shit.
#blue chatter#I’m fine nothing happened today#just. got to deal with my apparently incredibly queerphobic brothers this weekend#on top of my quietly queerphobic mom#why is my dad who went to priest school the only one here being kind about this#I’m so tired#I hate having new things to tell my therapist every time I come home#and I wish I could put my foot down and be like ‘I’m not going home until this stops’#but every time I actually talk to my parents my resolve crumbles like a Cheeto under someone’s heel#I hate being scared all the time#and having to hide how hurt I feel in case I get called volatile again#because heaven forbid I feel angry#when my brother tells me to my face that he hates everyone like me and that they’re sinning against God#without a trace of irony. and them my mom is like ‘I think you can talk this out’#NO!!! I cannot!!!!!! I can barely talk this out with you bc you think this is a phase!!!!#I hate dreading to go to my parents’ house every time#my therapy is helping but half the time I feel like it makes me feel worse#anyway. angrypost done. I’m gonna paint a little.#and then go to bed.#goodnight y’all
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finding certain things abt men insanely attractive that men themselves are so insecure about that it bleeds into every part of their life and makes them horrible people so it therefore makes it impossible for me to find a man i like with those attributes. HELL ON EARTH!!!!!
#men under 5’6 especially men 5’4 and under make me want to run around and scratch up my walls like a crazed jaguar in a cage#and they are all so insecure about it that they think everyone hates them and all women think theyre dogshit so they are annoying and#misogynists. KILLS MYSELF!!!!!!#also. it must be said. i think a micropenis is hot!#<- girl who likes the idea of giving blowjobs but doesnt want to actually try and put anything more than 2 inches in my mouth#anyways. thats enough information for tonight. GOODNIGHT BEAUTIFUL WORLD!!!
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Suffer bitch
#I am wishing so many bad things on her I am sorry I don’t want to be the bigger person#anyways for my menty H I will be trying to go to sleep now but. thank you all#I love everyone on tumblr#and hate everyone on twitter#except the like 2 people who defended me y’all can stay#okay goodnight xoxoxo love#you all
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Hey. I don’t have a lot to say. Or I do but I don’t know how and I don’t even think I would help but I do have to say this. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that trump won and I’m sorry we are going to suffer for it. I am here if someone needs to talk. I don’t get on this account very often and I might make a post on my main account but I don’t think this will reach many people either way but I want to put it out there because I know how horrible everything feels right now at least for me.
I don’t really know what to say still but I just wanted to say that I’m here and people who want to talk I’m more then happy to listen because sometimes you just need to get that negativity out. If there is anything I can say or add to this to help that I can think of I’ll add it but I’m tired and should sleeping so I’m gonna try. Goodnight and I hope everyone who reads this knows that I’m rooting for them even though that might not mean a lot I still am and I wanted to say it.
#I don’t really know what to tag this#us politics#I guess?#lgbtqia#because yeah#I don’t know if poc have a tag that they use#please let me know#woman#feminism#disability#i genuinely dont know#I just want people to see this and know that people care#because I feel really disheartened right now and I hate to think how people who are more out or poc are feeling#I’m straight passing and probably get lumped in with those people so I don’t know how it feels to not be in that position#and I just#I wish I could hug y’all cause I know this sucks#anyways goodnight#I hope everyone is doing okay#or as okay as you can right now🩵
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breaks my heart that some people think tangle is a boring character. yeah she's not that complex in the sense that she's pretty easy to read but i feel like i didn't get the memo that apparently someone being emotionally open means they are like. boring. like i like whisper but i can't stand when people say whisper is the "better" character because 1) on what basis? bigger lore-heavy backstory doesn't automatically = better character and 2) that just like. defeats the purpose of how those two complement each other. whisper's got a lore-heavy backstory and tangle has a more simplistic one (at least by the looks of it right now), whisper's got more complicated motivations than tangle, etc., but that's like. Why they're interested in each other in the first place. this is pointless. like both this argument and me making a post ranting about it they're funny animals from a comic book. but it's FINE
#வார்த்தைகள்#it's also so funny because some people get mad that she's ''girl sonic'' but it's like. Oh so you agree?#you're not gonna say that about sonic but since tangle is a girl you find it boring?#also idk she pretty obviously has her own insecurities. the miniseries was really good with showing her overeagerness and impulsivity#and like sometimes it's just the sad case of the writing being bad in an issue and everyone hates the character for it...#can't really do anything about that.#tangle's definitely had some weird writing before and unfortunately since she's a newer character she's under much greater scrutiny for it#than like. mainline game characters.#ANYWAYS sonic thoughts at 2am i need to go to bed NOW. GOODNIGHT
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Goodnight to everyone except for people who hate watermelon (LIKE SERIOUSLY HOW??? I get if you're allergic, but otherwise, WHY???)
#This applies to my sister#Anyways I must go be consumed by my slumber in a world of never ending universes of fantasy and reality#Goodnight#Okay Fine. Goodnight to everyone (even if you hate watermelon)
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I think the routine my new job is giving me has been really good for my mental health but it's funnier to say Ive been too tired to be mentally ill
#like work is bearable when ur getting paid to do something you enjoy and ur coworkers are nice etc#also somehow lucked out working at a library where im encouraged to listen to music while im working in the stacks???#thats still wild to me i can use my noise cancelling blutooth headphones while im shelving books and not get in trouble for it#im having the most consistent sleep schedule ive had since i hit puberty. 7-7.5h of sleep nearly every day#had two days of 6h sleep but it was fine im used to running on 5 😭 im too tired to stay up spiraling into breakdowns !!#i get into bed and im asleep in less than an hour 😭 ive even stopped waking up hours before my alarm im sleeping thru the night#waking up is another story tho i hate waking up at 7am its so hard to eat and get out the door in 45mins when my brain is still booting up#anyway its 11pm im going to bed goodnight everyone ily ❤️🫂
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#alright these tags are super embarrassing but i needed to rant publicly so uh. you can read this but please don't perceive me too much#it is so fucking exhausting having nobody to share my life with#i have literally zero friends at this point bc ever since my grandpa died i've pretty much stopped trying to keep in touch with my hometown#friends and i cut off my 'friend' group that were racist assholes who treated me like a doormat back in october and haven't really made any#close friends at college since. and i just fucking hate that this is the same way i've felt for so many fucking years like you'd think it#would be bearable at this point and i'd be used to being alone and for a while i honestly was but it just hit me tonight how fucking lonely#i am and how tomorrow i have to keep on just doing the shit i have to do in life without anyone to talk to and share it with#other than my mom who's been pissing me off lately so i've been pushing her away too!#it's so tiring to have to go out and do things and have responsibilities everyday and not being able to share that with anyone idk it makes#it feel almost like i'm carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders which is SO dramatic i know#like today i wanted to talk about the stupid false alarm gas leak thing with my sort of friends in this club i'm in but i didn't get to talk#to anyone at the meeting bc everyone was just talking amongst themselves in their little groups of best friends and it just reminded me that#i don't have that and i've never fucking had that i've only ever pretended i had that#it's like all these years i've been pretending to be a person that has friends and knows how to live life normally but i never have#more than anything i just miss my friends from home bc they're the closest i've ever felt to having friends that are like family but. i#don't know how to talk to them anymore. i didn't tell any of them when my grandpa died and i think they just assumed that i've moved on so#they've probably moved on and i already know that they have their own lives and friends at their schools that are a lot more full than mine#wanna know the worst part about all of this? i just had therapy and basically told her everything's fine#and i won't meet with her again until 3 weeks from now so literally the only person i can talk to about this right now is my mom#which i am absolutely not gonna do bc she's gonna get so scared and worried for me and i can't have that rn#anyways yeah. this isn't even that big of a deal like i haven't had friends for at least the past 6 months it's not like anything's changed#i just feel extra sad about it right now. i need a distraction stat gonna go watch watch some tv goodnight#shut up hanna
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People taking the time out of their day to send anonymous hate really is wild to me.
Welcome to Simblr kindergarten! Before you take your wimpy anon ass into someone's inbox to send some foolish (or downright deplorable) shit, ask yourself the following:
If it isn't one of these things, maybe just unfollow and/or log off. It is really not difficult!
#I'm being so serious. Stop that shit.#I don't know why you all feel so empowered to send anonymous hate but it's cowardly and dumb as fuck#if you're going to be hateful do that shit with your whole chest. Own your shit#because I'm sorry but I don't listen to a damn criticism from someone who has to hide in order to say it#blocked on sight#Aren't some of ya'll tired? Get up! Go to bed bitch!#This is why we gotta keep hoping the assholes will deactivate on their own. Like byeeee!!!#anyway I'm tired lol. I love everyone who is NICE and COMPASSIONATE#goodnight!#personal#cussingtw#tw: cussing
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just submitted the job application im really nervous abt 😭🙏
#idk why im even nervous im technically qualified#it just sounds intimidating#also i rlly hope they dont call my current employer bc...they dont know im leaving... el oh el#anyway aaaaaaa#job hunting is so stressful i literally thought i would be relieved to have it out there but no#🤡🤡🤡#anyway i should have done this earlier bc now im trying to go to bedtime mid panic attack lmao#goodnight everyone#this has been a shitpost#im sooo nervous but i hope i get it bc i hate my current job sm#and this is a nice office job so hopefully not so hard on my health as my current manual labor job lol
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