#anyway yeah I love Peter Capaldi's Doctor

[roseposts-stuff]

hello hello!! its time for the doctor who rankings again, today it's time for series 8!! really like this series guys not gonna lie :D again, these are my opinions and also just. mostly for my benefit but i post them here in case someone else is interested in my thoughts???

1. Listen (8x4) - oh how i love this episode guys, i love the opening already, peter capaldi was MADE for stuff like this, i think. i like the idea of a creature that has perfected hiding, i think that's interesting, and i love the ending with clara talking to the doctor as a kid, i love how we kinda still left it ambiguous whether this creature exists or not (i think it does, the creature that was on danny's bed didn't look like a human, even though we didn't see it clearly, but it's not 100% sure this creature is actually real). always love it when doctor who goes horror

2. Mummy on the Orient Express (8x8) - SO good, love this episode, i love the mystery of the mummy and i think a morally grey doctor was written well in this, i liked perkins a lot and kinda wished he had become a companion, and i liked the story. also the "are you my mummy" heritage still going strong lmao

3. Flatline (8x9) - SO GOOD!! i love the idea of creatures that are in 2D that's interesting, i like clara and there are so many hilarious things in this, personally i died permanently when clara just pulled the hammer from the bag and went "apparently they're in the walls", it was so funny to me lol, yeah, brilliant i think

4. Deep Breath (8x1) - does the beginning with clara feel a bit weird considering she has literally seen every regeneration of the doctor's and knows how it works? yeah. but i get where they're going with it and why it is there, because the audience has just lost the previous doctor, who is this new guy here why is he so different, how can he suddenly be so old?? the kids who might have started watching with matt smith might say, and i get that clara is now acting as the audience, i don't mind it. and i like the scene with vastra and clara. and the second half of the episode is brilliant, i love clara with the robot. guys. i don't remember if they had a name sorry guys lol. but she was great. i really think she's so much better in this series than in series 7. and this episode also has some really funny moments, i had so much fun following the doctor's adventures, and i love jenny, vastra and strax as people might notice from the previous posts. i LOVE them. miss them every day i want them back i hate that this is their last appearance on tv :( but yeah, a great introduction to the new doctor, dare i even say better than the eleventh hour are we ready for that conversation??

5. Dark Water/Death in Heaven (8x11/8x12) - always love meeting kate even if she's in a small role, live laugh love kate lethbridge-stewart if she got no fans i'm dead. anyway, i like finally meeting missy properly, she's great and i enjoyed the doctor and her together. i think the cliffhanger is good and i personally am a danny pink defender, i was sad that he died, he wasn't my favourite character but i didn't hate him like most people seem to do lol. i also think the cybermen are alright and the nod to the brigadier and the doctor saluting him is really nice i think

6. Time Heist (8x5) - it's a nice story, i like the concept and the teller is an interesting creature in my opinion, i like the time travel heist stuff and i like psi and saibra, i think it's great and seems a bit underappreciated in the fandom? or have i just not seen people talk about it? i don't know

7. Robot of Sherwood (8x3) - this was actually pretty good fun, i laughed so many times watching this, and even though the story isn't the best in my opinion, i think this is still very fun and enjoyable and i had a great time watching it. robin hood and the doctor's dynamic was actually pretty hilarious

8. The Caretaker (8x6) - i must say, this made me laugh a few times, i think it's fun, and i like clara and danny's relationship stuff here, i think the dynamic between the doctor and danny is interesting, but the story itself isn't the best and i don't think it's anything special

9. Into the Dalek (8x2) - now i get what this story is going for and how we start exploring the question of whether the doctor is a good man or not is great, i like that theme, and i personally like that last excange with the doctor and the dalek, how the doctor says that hatred isn't victory and the double meaning of "a good dalek". but even though steven moffat is 100% one of my favourite doctor who writers, something i must say that he doesn't get right are the daleks, i don't think he gets them. i think he sees them just plainly as evil angry tanks, which they're not, yes they're obviously evil, but they do have sort of personality, they're occasionally sassy and think themselves to be cleverer than they are, and i don't think moffat gets their characterisation right

10. In the Forest of the Night (8x10) - i don't hate it but it's not good either. it's pretty boring because our characters are just randomly running around a forest, which i do think can be done well, but this wasn't. i found clara and danny's relationship stuff to be okay and i think it was so sweet the kids shipped them lol, and i do think that the fact that this had so much of them being kinda happy makes danny's death in the next episode more sad. and i did 100% pick up on the message about protecting trees, which is indeed important, and i liked that the trees were protecting the earth and that children made the message to everyone like young people do today with the climate change, i think that's something that's good about this story.

11. Kill the Moon (8x7) - i don't completely hate it, it's got a few kinda funny lines and i think it did the morally grey doctor thing well, and i love the ending with clara. but the anti-abortion message is not it, and you know i'm giving the writer the benefit of the doubt, because i can 100% see an another way to interpret the story, that humans want to destroy things that they don't know about and we should instead give them a chance because it could be a good thing, but the way some things are worded in the story are just giving anti-abortion message. and i personally wasn't a fan of the random astronaut and the story as a whole just wasn't for me. though i think the morally grey doctor is done well, it feels kinda weird that he just. disappears mid story, i don't know, but yeah, not a fan

there we are, i liked this series, lots of great episodes i think, and peter capaldi is fantastic of course :D

[nortism]

doctor who liveblog pt 42

s8 ep7 kill the moon

- i already know what happens in this episode because i’ve seen the sarah z video essay about it (i love watching analysis of shows i haven’t seen) but i’m going to watch it anyway for the experience

- terrible cgi spider

- tumblr mention?! truly a different time

- i knew it was coming but the moon’s an egg is an insane premise for an episode

- oh i am seeing the pro life themes, this is weird as hell

- it would be nice if he killed hitler

- women have to do everything huh 😒😒

- he is being a bit of a prat

- this light system thing doesn’t seem like the best idea, what about the side of the earth they can’t see from the moon? do they not get a say? also street lights are controlled by councils not individuals, whatever whatever i don’t even care

- wait are they not going listen to the people?

- hello dragon

- they’re leaving her on the beach wtf???

- i’m so incredibly confused

- sarah z was right, this whole episode felt really patronising in a way i can’t quite put my finger on

s8 ep8 mummy on the orient express

- train episode woo

- space train

- 20s clara!!

- are they gonna discuss last episode??

- oh jazz queen

- oh they’re discussing

- the doctor vs feelings

- this is why he needs companions, he can’t keep talking to himself

- i want clara’s pyjamas, they looks so comfy

- jelly babies in a cigarette case 😭😭

- at a certain point you’ve got to just break down the door

- uh oh mummy

- bubble wrap mummy?!

- ohhh it’s all an elaborate escape room

- it can sense psychological issues, oh id be dead

- oh clara

- they can’t resist the “are you my mummy?” jokes

- ohh clara

s8 ep9 flatline

- aww tiny tardis door

- aww tiny tardis

- why don’t both the doors open, that would be helpful

- awww tiny tiny tardis

- id love a tiny tardis with a big peter capaldi instead

- DOCTOR OSWALD

- ohh evil wall creatures

- ohhh the murals are the people

- ok forgot to liveblog bc i was crocheting but yeah that was crazy

[musical-chick-13]

ITS PUTTING YOUR TRUE CONTROVERSIAL WHO OPINIONS IN MEL’S ASK TIME.

Anyway. My ACTUAL (I think, please correct me) controversial Who opinion is I think Peter Capaldi was the best doctor of nuWho AND should have gotten EVERY POSSIBLE AWARD for his role. Fucking criminal. (Goes to watch his zygon monologue and sob over it for the zillionith time)

MY OTHER ONE. Ten is my least favorite doctor and I will NEVER be over his treatment of Martha. The only redeemable qualities of his run are 1.Martha and 2. Catherine Tate as Donna

I WILL DIE ON THESE HILLS.

(Putting this in your ask so you can decide to publish it rather than me risking starting a war on your post. 🖤)

AS ALWAYS YOU ARE CORRECT AND GALAXY-BRAINED AND I AM ETERNALLY GRATEFUL FOR YOU 💜💜

(Granted, I can't claim to know everything about how the general DW fandom operates, but I feel like the most common opinions of Twelve I see are one of three: "Capaldi is a good actor, but his story material was terrible," "Well there's nothing wrong with him, necessarily, but everything about the Moffat Era is horrible, so I gave up watching before his run finished," or "eh/he was boring." So yeah I'd say, "Twelve was my favorite part of nuwho" is still a pretty *Controversial* opinion. Tbh anything beyond Ten was the Best nuwho is a pretty *Controversial* opinion, but I've already talked about. That.)

JUSTICE FOR MARTHA 2KFOREVER. This is one of the few things that is genuinely non-negotiable for me. GOD she deserved so much better, I love her so much. 😭😭😭

MARTHA "I'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED, BUT I STILL WON'T LET THIS LADY ENDANGER THE WELL-BEING OF HER DEVELOPING BABY BECAUSE THAT IS AN INNOCENT PERSON" JONES. MARTHA "I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF A POTENTIALLY HOSTILE ALIEN COLONY, BUT I WILL STILL OFFER MY MEDICAL EXPERTISE TO AN INJURED LIFE FORM BECAUSE I WANT TO HELP" JONES. MARTHA "THIS SITUATION IS BAD FOR ME, I AM LEAVING FOR MY OWN GOOD BECAUSE I WANT TO BE AROUND PEOPLE WHO AREN'T AFRAID TO APPRECIATE ME" JONES. MARTHA "I WALKED ALL OVER THE EARTH AND AVOIDED DEATH ALL BY MY FUCKING SELF AND SUCCESSFULLY PULLED ONE OVER ON THE MASTER" JONES. THE LOVE OF MY FUCKING LIFE.

[nonbinarylocalcryptid]

MAG11 - Dreamer, review and stuff

Diversity wins! The guy who dreamed about your death is gay!

I was hesitant to write this one because I didn't know where to start. Not because it isn't good, I love every single episode of The Magnus Archives, this whole exercise (reviews etc) brings up a few questions to me, what's the point of consuming horror media if I am not scared by it? Can I truly review it if I'm not scared?

And, in relation to MAG11, is death scary?

Well, personally I find the horror genre intriguing, and highly dramatic. It's a dark fantasy that you won't have the chance to experience in real life (or at least, I hope so xD). TMA plays with probability, rather than impossibility, even if there are some fantastic elements in the mix. Every episode is a promise, or a threat, horror and fear would find you anywhen and anywhere. Not even the Dreamer is safe from this promise.

Can I review the hell out it? Yep, yes I can. I can be objective, and I can analyze how well constructed everything is. Have you ever reached episode 200 and made a relisten? Do it, you won't regret it.

Death is scary, is the only certainty in life and at the same time, is paradoxically, uncertain. Everything ends, that much we know, and Antonio Blake doesn't seem to think there's nothing after.

I always think about this quote from Doctor Who when thinking about death, maybe it's useful for you

(Transcript: Peter Capaldi's Twelfth Doctor in The Return of Doctor Mysterio, "Things end. That's all. Everything ends and it's always sad. But everything begins again too and that's always happy. Be happy.)

And talking about quotes, let's comment some bits from the episode:

"I’d broken up with Graham, my boyfriend of six years (...)" - Antonio Blake, March 14th 2015

Yes, yes, weird thing to remark, but hear me out: Graham? Graham?? Is the same Graham as in Graham Folger????

"It was there, sleeping on my friend Anahita’s sofa, in the depths of my misery, that I first started to have the dreams." - Also Mr Blake

Woah, take a seat misery etc, I'm this dramatic too

"I found myself standing atop the very peak of Canary Wharf and overlooking the Barclays building where I had spent so many hateful hours. Behind me I could feel the pulsing beat of the light that stands atop that looming tower; it thrummed through me and I could see the glow pass across my skin like oil but, try as I might, I could not turn around to look at it." - I don't know why it's so appealing.

I tried to recreate it with a screenshot from Google Earth and Photoshop, the result doesn't convince me but it's pretty close xD

"Lucid dreaming has never been a skill I’ve possessed, and I generally get swept along in the current of whatever runs though my sleeping consciousness." - I love it when horror characters get logical, like, uhm, this shouldn't be possible, sir, this is a Wendy's

"And by my estimation he had appeared about ten days before his death. I tell you this because I feel you have a right to know the sort of timescales that we’re dealing with here." - Antonio "may as well just roll with it" Blake

He is so chill about all of this, isn't he? Like, yeah, I have this weird ass powers, I figured out more or less how they work and hey, you're next

"I’m well aware that I don’t even know your name, and I have no responsibility to try and prevent whatever fate is coming for you." - Antonio "I'm doing it anyway because I'm that chill and cool" Blake

"At the very least, you should look into appointing a successor." - LMAO

" I have no idea if Gertrude got the chance to read this statement before she passed away, but if anyone comes in ranting about dreaming my death, then I very much want to hear about it." - Jon "anything is bs except Leitners and prophecies about my death" Sims, April 15th 2016

Sir, with all due respect, wtf

General overview:

Vibe: it's mysterious with a side of peace and quiet

Horror: spooky, just plain old good spooky

Audio: pretty ASMR in general

Humour: Jon, why are u like this

Score: 10/10

[just-some-random-blogger]

good morning/day/evening, my lovely angel!! youre soso sweet and cute i cant TT 'i was bummed out i couldnt write' its ok dont worry about me! your comfort is the thing that matters the most! give yourself time. 'i havent written in 2 days' its ok. i cant state but do you think it may be burning out? bc you work really hard and have lots of work beside writing. you really owe nothing to anyone. ill repeat it as many times as i need. bc you do great, you study, do covers, you do a lot. thats more than great! you still worth the world and let down noone. and if anyone have the guts to say otherwise, i can have their tongue. you are the priority. if you dont feel like writing, maybe you shouldnt force yourself to do it to even lessen your minds ability to do it rn. give yourself time. tumblrs nothing when it comes to your mental powers. i dont remember if you say smth about 'kiss it better' later but id talk abt it here. i hope things will get better for you. hope your manifest works really well and ability to do creative things cutie. its very comforting. hope you enjoyed writing it. also the whole concept made me remember the song 'guard you' by young k. its just the most comforting song for me. its released on my bday but for some reason i ignored it for months? ill never forgive this. its really good to have someone to take care of you and 'guard you'. even if im not next to you, remember im always here for you and will always support you. 'i have to keep making art. i cant stop' its great if you cant and feel like it. but please dont force and overwork yourself. you are still you if you currently dont have strength to make art. 'i do love his name' your love for masc feminine names is so adorable TT hes not completely CRINGE meme but not a kind(?) meme either. its difficult to explain esp with how humor here is but yes. 'why didnt you put an episode number' i watched it like.. 2 years ago. you think i remember? im a grandcat myself. i need to do a research for it. maybe at weekends (basically its saturday even here rn but nvm). first epp with matt smith is pretty touching esp with karen gillah and a little drama they have but i also like peter capaldis doctor. esp the beginning of his era. well see. and i never watched davids seasons TT im sorry but its true, cant help you here. 'if i cant write this rn' and hows it? 'poor bb girl witch' nooo she shouldnt feel like it TT the point is she loves her love more than she loves the very daemon. 'sounds tiring' reasonable. ig it can be said abt all my ideas. btw, wfal isnt tiring you? or like a burden? ik you dont like writing long things so im kinds worried now. 'i need a cleanse fic' is it kiss it better? anyway do wild girl! 'but i’ll listen to it later' did you listen to it?... im not making you, just interested ghdjfj. also! ive only learnt abt 'Running up That Hill' by Kate Bush (in another witchy playlist...) and 1) i LOVE it sm her voice and the way of singing is so enchanting? 2) it gives me waiting for a lifetime vibes.. yeah its origin meaning isnt exactly abt it but its the magic of art isnt it? the opportunity to interpret it however you want. and the deal with god pretty much reminds me of the au. 'you’ve got such a beautiful brain' thanks TT take it after my catmom. ive got lots of things to do for the exams but my mental state has only allowed me to watch videos with kitties, cry cats and dogs and listen to this song of kate for the past week. theres the one i cried hardest over (subjectively) and theres the one i cried hardest (objectively). theyre just cute if you ever feel like it. and HEs so tiny i SCREAMED. thats it. just cute vids to bring your mood up. how are you? whats the weather like? hope you are or will soon do great. have a nice day/evening/night! ill try to find an episode and write down some ideas, maybe youll find some inspiration in them. good luck with all the hw and assignments! take care! love you<з *freezy kisses for you to not burn in your weather*

hello my love <3 <3 <3

meow meow muning <3

good morning/day/evening, my lovely angel!! youre soso sweet and cute i cant TT

wait why am i so sweet? what did i do?

anyway LOOOK I GOT A NEW OUTFIT FOR LISA!!!

here she is normally

that's all.

'i was bummed out i couldnt write' its ok dont worry about me! your comfort is the thing that matters the most! give yourself time.

T_T but i love you

'i havent written in 2 days' its ok. i cant state but do you think it may be burning out?

T_T ... i think youre right. T_T

bc you work really hard and have lots of work beside writing. you really owe nothing to anyone. ill repeat it as many times as i need. bc you do great, you study, do covers, you do a lot. thats more than great! you still worth the world and let down noone. and if anyone have the guts to say otherwise, i can have their tongue. you are the priority. if you dont feel like writing, maybe you shouldnt force yourself to do it to even lessen your minds ability to do it rn. give yourself time. tumblrs nothing when it comes to your mental powers.

thank you. this means a lot to me to hear this. you dont know how very much your words mean to me.

i want to write. but i cant. i want to write ideas outside my reqs but also i want to make reqs but also i cant. i dont know

i dont remember if you say smth about 'kiss it better' later but id talk abt it here. i hope things will get better for you. hope your manifest works really well and ability to do creative things cutie. its very comforting. hope you enjoyed writing it.

i dont know if i enjoyed writing it but while rereading it i was like 'damn im really good at writing' i hope i get out of this hitch T_T

also the whole concept made me remember the song 'guard you' by young k. its just the most comforting song for me. its released on my bday but for some reason i ignored it for months? ill never forgive this. its really good to have someone to take care of you and 'guard you'. even if im not next to you, remember im always here for you and will always support you.

omg this was yonks parting gift before enlisting. (i call young-k yonk cos thats what it reads like yonk HAHHAH) im so touched that you feel this way towards me T_T i feel the same for you. lol its so funny you ignored it but ended up loving it HAHAH. i want a hug from you for real i want to cry.

'i have to keep making art. i cant stop' its great if you cant and feel like it. but please dont force and overwork yourself. you are still you if you currently dont have strength to make art.

T_T i want a hug. i dont know if im forcing myself but maybe youre right i should stop T_T

'i do love his name' your love for masc feminine names is so adorable TT hes not completely CRINGE meme but not a kind(?) meme either. its difficult to explain esp with how humor here is but yes.

i have nothing else to say about him so heres him with a dog <3 i love the dog dog <3

'why didnt you put an episode number' i watched it like.. 2 years ago. you think i remember? im a grandcat myself. i need to do a research for it. maybe at weekends (basically its saturday even here rn but nvm).

grandcat T_T it ok i just assumed you had an episode in mind. you dont have to research

first epp with matt smith is pretty touching esp with karen gillah and a little drama they have

i'll watch that!

but i also like peter capaldis doctor. esp the beginning of his era.

ive seen crack edits of jenna coleman and him and i kinda wanna watch his too

well see. and i never watched davids seasons TT im sorry but its true, cant help you here.

LOL HAHHAH thats fine thank you anyway i love you

'if i cant write this rn' and hows it?

T_T i cant write it im sorry

'poor bb girl witch' nooo she shouldnt feel like it TT the point is she loves her love more than she loves the very daemon.

She loves her love for daemon more than daemon himself? or daemon lovers her more than daemon ???

'sounds tiring' reasonable. ig it can be said abt all my ideas.

its not your idea that tiring its the idea of writing that tires me. baby i love your ideas T_T please stop exploding on yourself

btw, wfal isnt tiring you? or like a burden? ik you dont like writing long things so im kinds worried now.

🙄 gee. i literally make mood boards for it, i wonder if its tiring. well ok enough sarcasm, it is very much laborious but its a labor of love. i have not enjoyed writing a... series in a long time. its not a burden. i promise you i will stop writing that fic once i feel like im done with it. i was partially joking about ending i at p5 but i do hope i manage to keep it short T_T asfhs/flhsd

'i need a cleanse fic' is it kiss it better? anyway do wild girl!

it was. but idk if i was cleansed

'but i’ll listen to it later' did you listen to it?... im not making you, just interested ghdjfj.

i listened to the first part of the first song and i ejected i dont remember why but i guess i didnt like the vibe T_T

also! ive only learnt abt 'Running up That Hill' by Kate Bush (in another witchy playlist...) and 1) i LOVE it sm her voice and the way of singing is so enchanting? 2) it gives me waiting for a lifetime vibes.. yeah its origin meaning isnt exactly abt it but its the magic of art isnt it? the opportunity to interpret it however you want. and the deal with god pretty much reminds me of the au.

ive listened to this song before. she does have a very strong and enchanting voice. im honored that my fic reminds you things T_T thats so sweet and so nice of you. im honored to have such an impact on you <3

'you’ve got such a beautiful brain' thanks TT take it after my catmom. ive got lots of things to do for the exams but my mental state has only allowed me to watch videos with kitties, cry cats and dogs and listen to this song of kate for the past week.

you and i are so same. our mental capacities are overloaded. i think i might really just stop writing for a while T_T idk ive got these ideas i want to get out of my brain though

theres the one i cried hardest over (subjectively)

T_T PUMA PUMA <3

and theres the one i cried hardest (objectively).

LOOONG BABY FLOOF <3

theyre just cute if you ever feel like it. and HEs so tiny i SCREAMED.

ive seen this before T_T theyre SO tiny i squishhhhh

thats it. just cute vids to bring your mood up.

thank you they mean so much <3 this post is really cute too. im luv

how are you?

im currently in class not listening because id rather reply to you. dw its a concept ive studied before. my head hurts and im hungry. i also want to pee so badly but i cant leave my desk. i want to read fics to badly

whats the weather like?

its so hot my head hurts

hope you are or will soon do great.

me too i hope you are also well.

have a nice day/evening/night!

i love you i hope you have a nice day too <3

ill try to find an episode and write down some ideas, maybe youll find some inspiration in them.

thank you so much <3 the fact you care enough to do that. T_T thank you.

good luck with all the hw and assignments! take care! love you<з

me too T_T i want to graduate. i dont want to fail. i cant fail. T_T i feel dumb sometimes even though i know deep down im not T_T

*freezy kisses for you to not burn in your weather*

thank you <3 i love you

i also wanted to share this video about wolves. i love it so much. it makes me love nature so much. it makes you realize how important it is to allow animals to stay in their habitats.

also this tiger series. i used to watch this so much. i love tiggers love love love

i love you bye bye my love

xxx

[katierosefun]

anyways i watched the first episode of doctor who season 8 and woke up to write a ~1.5k word whouffaldi fic and im just remembering how much i love them like wow they really were my first ride-or-die ship,,,like the ship that destroyed me.

anyways im still always going to be posting 95% tcw content but u might find me screaming a little about whouffaldi every so often just because 🥺 guys 🥺 they really made me believe in true love though—

[randomthunk]

I once had some dude mansplain to me how the clip where Peter Capaldi calls 12 and Clara a “truly romantic relationship” isn’t actually Peter confirming the two characters are in love but that the two are just bond through the “romance of travel and adventure” and that he was using the old term that had nothing to do with my silly ideas of romantic love and that it was all in my head that 12 and Clara were in love. WTF thanks for telling me your a pompous ass who didn’t remotely pay attention.

I will kick off this post by saying I don't like the word "mansplain", particularly because in my experience with fandom, I am just as likely - if not MORE - to encounter asshole women who decide to do the "well ackshually" at me. Especially Whouffaldi, my word, you start talking ship wars and women will just straight up go for the jugular, no questions asked. Just remember, everybody has the capacity to be a pompous dickweed.

What I find particularly interesting about the argument there is that it's a very roundabout way to avoid accepting what the word "romance" means, but still trying to sneakily slide into homeplate and claim you totally know what "romance" means. You can certainly use "romantic" in the context of "the romance of travel and adventure", but that's not what Capaldi said. It was "a truly romantic relationship". I guess you can do backflips and twists and look at the various definition of "romantic" and go "yeah it's about the adventure and wonderlust of time and space and how that bonds people", though I find that a really tortured path to get there. At a certain point, your best argument really becomes "uhh, do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"

What is maybe more important here is that you need to divorce the word "romantic" from "sexual", which is synonymous in current pop culture. They are not the same thing, at all. Any married couple will tell you that, and I also think it's worth mentioning how often 12 and Clara were compared to and felt like an old married couple. We are so tied to this idea that, in order to prove a couple loves each other, they have to do the do on screen, which is truly weird. Though, have you watched Mummy on the Orient Express recently? Anyway.

It's worth looking at meta stuff, like Capaldi not feeling comfortable with the idea of kissing his younger co-star, and I can respect that. You do not need physical acts like that in order to validate a romantic relationship. Likewise, Jenna stated several times that Clara loves the Doctor, so we know how she feels, very plainly. Really, have you watched Mummy on the Orient Express recently? I digress.

If you're here, then you know all the other stuff - there's things in episodes, there's lines and quotes, there's scenes we've giffed eight thousand times, there's Moffat interviews, there's books and passages - there's a whole lot of stuff I can cite that says "mmm, no, I don't think you're quite right". I felt extremely validated on my feelings in series 8, and only got more validated in series 9. The novelization of Twice Upon A Time described 12 seeing Clara as "to see her was to see hope" - get out of here with that 'it wasn't THAT kind of romantic' nonsense. It's fine if you don't ship it yourself, but come on.

And at the end of the day, no matter what anyone says, Heaven Sent exists, which is there to whack you in the head with a 2x4 in case you didn't get it yet.

[omegangrins]

A Treatise On the Doctor

I don't know how to start this. Because I think of Peter Capaldi's words when he said that the only thing required to be a Doctor Who fan, is kindness.

I like 13 and think Chibnall is doing his best job writing the show.

So I struggle to write this because I am engaging against that very unkindness in the Doctor Who fandom, and trying very hard not to be angry back. "Allways try to be nice but never fail to be kind." But I've begun to wonder more and more if those who speak so loudly against the show really know what the show itself is about.

Enough of talking about other people though, cause frankly they're only important as set-up for this conversation. And again, I'm working kind.

So here's what you're gonna learn from this lifelong fan (and the best Tl;dr you're gonna get):

1. The Doctor sucks. From the very beginning. People complain about character traits now that have been around as long as the show.

2. Due to the Doctor's suckage, they tend to do more harm than good. (And because of this, most of the Doctor's "friends" along the way have been, well, let's leave it at the air quotes for now cause it's a damn big list of "BOOOO!!!".)

3. All of the showrunners and writers and actors and editors and everyone else has allways knows this and has played it this way.

4. And last but not least, since this is a time travel show. If you wanna know what and why stuff is happening now, look it up. Everything that happened before is allways in play.

5. None of this is bad, and in fact, it makes the show morally grayer. It's about kindness at all costs. Even your own.

A. First things first, the hard thing. The Doctor is not grrrreat. I mean, sure they try, but they fail a lot more often. In Extremis, a majority of those fatality index counts come from people the Doctor failed to save. That's why it's worded so specifically as "cause of death". All the death's caused by the Doctor's very interaction with time and lack of saving those around them. And part of it's not their fault, but more often than not, the Doctor says I can save you, and can't, won't, or chooses not to.

And that would be alright, but it took them over 1000 years to realize they should start letting their companions lead lives outside of theirs so THEY DON'T DIE. A bit too long as someone who claims to be better.

Not to mention how many times the Doctor is dismissive of their companions and the people around them only to use them for their help and just bug off again. If they truly cared and wanted to help, they would stay and listen in between adventures. Their lifespan is near infinite anyway. What's a few extra Earth hours with some friends you made along the way. You know, maybe fix some of the psychological and emotional damage created by encountering things behind a human's original scope of reasoning. But nope, we gotta go adventure more, byyyyeee!!

So when people talk about these qualities in 13 in a negative aspect I have to laugh because I'm not sure if they understand the joke. Cause we're talking about an alien that grew up around a species calling themselves Time Lords. I try not to blame them too much for it. 1 had to learn how to be hospitable to humans and it's been a bit of a slow learning curve ever since.

B. After the Doctor survived the horrors of the Time War and happened upon a human companion they felt worth connecting to, what did they do? They took Rose to watch her planet burn in front of her eyes. Great, first date, amirite?

And that's a little bit of companion damage. Do you know that the Doctor is responsible for the almost complete genocide of the Silurian race across multiple occasions. I am legitimately surprised there are any left after all of the ones the Doctor has killed. Like before, they cause destruction either purposefully or accidentally or simply by force of being there.

Remember before how I said that the Doctor just flies away. Yeah, they leave a lot of problems behind when they do (something that I can see Chibnall is planting the seeds of). If you had a time and space machine and practically unlimited capabilities and you choose to just leave after a situation and not check up on them from time to or see if there are any other underlying crises to be solved. But oh no, "gotta follow that rule of time and keep going even though I stopped in the first place because of how interested I was.". This is why 9 has a great arc about this. He thought he killed all the Daleks. They came back. He thought he'd gotten rid of the Slitheen. They came back. He thought he saved Satellite 5 from aliens. But opsies, they came back. And look! They're Daleks. Which he "finally" got rid of.

The Doctor just bounces around all carefree and without an ounce of care for themselves, their companions or consequences unless there's consequences for themselves or their companions. Then they get indignant.

Is that really kind of the person you want flying around fixing things in time and space? Who knows. But at least they are trying. Most of the time the T.A.R.D.I.S. lands somewhere and the authority figures are the most pretentious bull-headed pigs you can find. To me, I laugh cause it seems like both sides end up getting a taste of their own medicine. Usually with the bull charging to death in a sad glory while the Doctor wiles on metaphorically about not being as good as them.

But again, as a "superior" alien with "advanced" technology and "culture" you'd think they'd just know better already. But that's all part of the character. The Doctor may be in flux, but true change is difficult. The real hero of every story is the other people BESIDES the Doctor.

Cause the title is Doctor *Who* . The Who being half of the title, despite having less letters. It's the constant question of "What and why and who is that crazy person that's trying to help?" Why do you think they keep flying back to Earth? (Besides set construction reasons.) They've grown as attached to us as we have to them. And at this point, a lot of their saving us is guilt and embarrassment at having a hand in our timeline.

This is also the same reason the Doctor dumps companions in a fluff. Baggage. Every time a companion gets too heavy to carry the memories of... off they fly.

Except for 13. She's stayed. To this end, we can see how the Doctor changes. Not on our smaller, human timelines, but on the timeline of a god with way too much power.

D. With that in mind, we go Classic. It's the Who you need to consult if you wish to make any critique on what's happening now. Because how can you know how a part operates inside of a whole without seeing the whole part?

Cause I don't know if you've watched it but it can be rough, and I don't mean in the sense of production value (which admittedly they do a fairly decent job of using what money they had. A problem the BBC plagues to Doctor Who to this day.). The 3rd Doctor shits on every one they call friends constantly and then turns around expecting help. 4 did the same. Then 5 masked that contempt with a plucky face and a cheeky word. But it was still there, bubbling out of 6 and 7 as the inability to suffer fools gladly and using their own righteousness to enact change in their companions. A trait that kept going til an entire war and regeneration was used solving the question of "Doctor Who?" Only for them to try and forget twice more by putting on their pretty grinning faces and running away from it.

And I'm only talking from a companion perspective. Each of the Doctors has enacted their own form of genocide on countless species. Sure, it's to "save humans" but at the end of the day you'd have to ask yourself if we're really worth that blood. And this is all in the Doctor's history. As much as they claim better, they're hands are still gushing red.

The Doctor left Jo because she fell in love. They drove Adric to put their life on the line in order to feel adequate. The entirety of the Silurian race has been wiped out fivefold under their watch, with one time by their hand itself. Same for several other singular and unique species you won't be able to find elsewhere in the universe. 7 used time travel to enact a personality change in Ace while simultaneously using her as a pawn in an interdimensional war. The Time War itself. Sure it got erased but the Doctor still did those things ("War" Doctor or whatever nonsense titles they feel necessary to delude themselves). The entirety of Amy's childhood was destroyed by their presence, and Rory got erased. Twice! Sarah Kingdom. We know the list. Hell, the Doctor whisked Barbara and Ian away because they wanted to teach the snobby humans some lessons.

They may have a time machine, but we have the bill of their actions. This is where 13 excels. Because they're trying to be better than themselves. They've learnt the lessons of all those years traveling and the failures they wish they could reverse but don't as a way of keeping a scoreboard of pain. It's not perfect by any means, but look at 12 needing cue cards to understand and react to human grief under duress. They've come a helluva long way. After 50 years, I'm inclined to believe better. After all, it's what the Doctor would want.

E. You know how people like the ASOIAF series because it offers up morally complex characters existing in a morally complex world where black and white are harder to define than grey? Have you ever thought of Doctor Who as the same? Strip past the fairytale and adventure and "wibbly wobbly timey wimeyness and it's just people reacting to situations. We're just harder on the Doctor because they're hard on us. You could go round and round on who's the bigger killer, but at the end of the day Time Lords and humans fight and feel about the same things. It's allways been a joke to pretend otherwise.

That's why I love the Timeless Child. Not for making the Doctor anymore special but for saying that even despite having all of their specialness ripped away and repurposed to create a lie of a society then having the memory wiped of said event, the Doctor broke out of their mold, stole a TARDIS and told the Time Lords to fuck off. That's not a Captain America/Superman hero. That's Batman in space with a society of Lex Luthor's. Gotham and Gallifrey. The Doctor saw what they were a part of and broke free, without even knowing the more horrifying truth. Cause it's the thing I see many fans missing because they're so preocuppied with the Doctor being special. The thing that made the Doctor different was their ability to know the difference and walk away to find better. Now, the Doctor has a reason to go back and find out why they never stopped running.

The Time Lords might be the greatest monsters in the universe. It is in the name. "Lords". Those who would lord over us and impose their will with a banthium fist.

And this is a children's show.

C the thing is, the people who made and make this show all collectively rail against one thing: Hate. Kindness is the way of Doctor's. Even if they're sawing off your leg, it's to do the kindness of saving your life. This is because the people who make this (United Kingdomers) have seen centuries of war and conflict and oppression enacted by their own country in the name of progress. And they want to see it no more. Look no further than any of the Doctor's adventures with UNIT. Allways advocating for peace and being ignored for the comfortable war-cry. It's why it's hard to blame the Doctor when we do very similar and often worse (though we don't have time travel.... yet). The creators of this show know better, see better, and wrote better, to know that the powers that be nipped would nip their creations and sanitize them. So they wrote their messages so strong that you can feel them from the future. They're powerfull enough that even across eras they have all collectively moved me to write this.

That's another point I have to laugh at people saying Doctor Who has never been in your face about progressive politics. The Green Death. Survival. Trial of a Timelord (Yes, all of it. Sit down and power through.) The Happiness Patrol is one of my all time favorite episodes for going there in this regard. People may poo poo but history has its' eyes on you. Doctor Who loves taking potshots at the issues of the day. As long as you don't make the aliens black of course. Make them all the colors of the rainbow but never make them black. That'd be too on the nose (That's something they used to say back in the day! Crazy how far we've come).

So bravoa to Chibnall for continuing the legacy of Doctor Who. From where I'm standing, he's not doing anything different than any other showrunner before him. Cause if you want to argue canon, you at least have to know what created it. This show owes what it is to those Classic eras. And if you think Chibnall is shitting on those years and your childhood.... well, then why did you read this whole thing?

[gingerteaonthetardis]

tag game! i was tagged by @imogen-theimaginedcat and y'all know i like to talk about myself, so... here goes!

rules: answer the questions and then tag nine people who you want to get to know better! (or don't!! arguably, you have free will!)

ships?

any doctor and rose tyler!!

oh, you don't want more detail? but you're gonna get it anyway, because i have no self control?? and feel a chronic need to be known and understood??? cool!!

i also ship lots of other roles by actors who have played the doctor... and rose tyler. teninch is the most obvious, but it's a pretty wide net. marwood and rose? i've thought about it. malcolm tucker and rose? i've written it. (honestly, there should be a "teninch" style abbreviation for people like me who ship, like, peter capaldi's right ass cheek with rose fucking tyler.)

(i am most definitely kidding. i don't ship real people!!!)

(ass cheeks, however...)

i am also basically alone with my girl @lotsofthinkythoughts in our tiny little ot3 ship, where we paddle happily down the time-stream and daydream about the eighth doctor and his bisexual space blondes. (that is, my girl charley pollard and, you guessed it, rose tyler... are we sensing a theme here?) that said, i also ship charleight, because india fisher is a queen among women. it's pretty much the only exception to my "absolutely every doctor loves rose tyler, period" rule.

my non-dw ships are very limited and can be traced back to a traumatic childhood, lmao. delena? yeah, that vampire diaries ship still lurks around my skull sometimes. dramione? that's the ship that started it all for me. harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban (aka. hermione granger and the very good smack) is basically ground zero for all of my subsequent shipping. fremione came and punched me in the emotions last year, and i am still lowkey in love with them. i even have some fremione wips sitting around!

anyway, i think that's all? i think??

what's the last song i listened to?

okay, so, it's no witnesses by keaton henson, because apparently i like to cry while i shower?

what's the last movie i watched?

the first half of ang lee's 1995 sense and sensibility! eileen, we have to find time to finish it!! somebody give emma thompson a sword before i lose it!!!

what am i currently reading?

for once in my life, NOT MUCH. i have been writing so constantly lately that i haven't even made the time to read much fanfic!! i have a whole stack of books next to my desk, though, and among them is jenny slate's little weirds, which i have talked about before and have basically been perpetually reading and re-reading since first listening to the audiobook last year. it speaks to me, and it helps me feel more creative.

what food are you craving?

oh, god. what am i not craving? that's the more pertinent question. i have been craving lots of salty, fatty foods lately, and i know it's because i haven't been eating enough. like... fast food, chips... [insert gif of plastic mickey saying "PIZZA"]... but at this specific moment in time, my yearning is focused on a perfect eggroll, freshly out of hot oil, with the golden wrapping deliciously bubbled and browned, as well as the world's most massive carton of fried rice!!!! want it!!!

tagging: @saecookie, @ialwayscomewhenyoucall, @kallianeira, @kaleidoscopegirl, @darthtella, @zagreuses-toast, @caerdroia (love your new handle, by the WAY), @kelkat9, and oh my god, why do i suddenly forget every single person i have ever known when it comes time to tag people?! uhhh... @jefflion because i miss you!!

[iamdeltas]

X, T and K?

X - top 5-10 characters who are yoUR PRECIOUS BABIES AND YOU WILL DIE DEFENDING THEM This depends a lot on what I’m focused on at the moment (also, not all my faves count. Generally if I feel like a fave character has enough fans to defend them or whatever, I’m not gonna feel like I need to defend them. For instance, Elsa. Does Elsa have her haters? Sure. But she’s also crazy popular, so who cares if a few people hate her? That’s why she’s not on this list, even if I do like her.) but here goes, not in order tbh, just off the top of my head: Kamala Khan, always my girl, I adore her so much and I saw a post one day talking shit about her and I wanted to throttle OP. Anyway. Kamala is the best. I cannot wait for her MCU debut. Cassandra, from Tangled: the Series. I adored Cass right from the start, and of course, right from the start, I saw people shitting on her for, IDK, daring to *gasp* not like Eugene, I guess? Wow. So yeah, I’ll die defending Cass, she’s the best, even if she made some bad choices in s3 but hey. Who hasn’t stolen an ancient powerful artifact and gotten manipulated by a demonic Eldritch being, amirite? Della Duck, from Ducktales. I adore Della, she’s such an interesting and complex character who has made her fair share of mistakes but is also trying her best. The whole discourse post-”Timephoon” really showed me that she’s a character I’d die defending as well because holy shit were people shitting all over her for... daring to ground Louie, her son, for literally causing a spacetime disaster because he wanted to make money. Sigh. Anyway. I adore Della. Anna of Arendelle, from Frozen. Oh, Anna. So many people just flat out ignore you in favor of your sister, which is so unfair. Anna is wonderful and determined and optimistic and honestly such a badass? Like that (sadly deleted) scene said, her love could hold up the world. (Fun fact, part of the reason I desperately wanted my brain to get off the Frozen traintrack it was, ah, frozen on from June 2019 to January 2020 was because it resulted in me fixating on how much people flat out do not care about Anna, which wasn’t a fun time!) I am very glad she gets to be part of the bridge with Elsa but am sadly unsurprised that people continue to ignore that and just insist that it’s only Elsa who’s the Powerful, Wonderful, Most Amazing Fifth Spirit. Anna who? Granted, the movie could have emphasized that it’s Elsa and Anna who are the Fifth Spirit, together, but still. 

Alex Danvers, from Supergirl. Still my favorite character on the show! I don’t think she gets bashed as much as mostly just ignored? (I’d say poor Kara gets the brunt of the bashing. It’s very sad.) Unless Lena stans get confronted with the fact that their fave is doing some highly Unethical Things, then they start pointing to Alex for some reason and start saying, Yeah Well, Alex Works For A Shady Government Organization, So Who’s The *Real* Bad Guy Here? (Me: ....it’s still Lena, but go off, I guess.) I guess I just generally relate to her overwhelming Big Sister-ness and the high pressure she puts on herself because what a Mood, amirite? I feel that whole, anxiety that your parents will be disappointed in you because I feel that every day! I also adore how dedicated she is and how smart she is (something the fandom and the show often seem to ignore...) Connie Maheswaran, from Steven Universe. She’s the best! And she was totally the MVP of Steven Universe: Future, telling off all the Gems for making Steven’s problems about them because that was the last thing Steven needed! She’s practical and smart but at the same time so adventurous and brave and willing to stand up to protect the Earth! It’s very admirable. Steven Universe, from... you know. I’ve always liked Steven but I think Future gave me a greater appreciation for this kid. This poor kid has had to grow up so fast and basically play therapist for his Gem moms as well as for Gems who literally tried to kill him multiple times. His compassion is so admirable but wow did it result in him putting himself last! I have a soft spot for these types of characters, the characters who care so much about other people that they forget to care about themselves. (Alex Danvers is in this category also.) I know some people got mad about his downward spiral in Future, but honestly the complaints just strike me as being mad that Steven dares to have his own problems as opposed to being the Happy Boy Therapist Who Fixes Everyone Else’s Problems And Has Zero Problems Of His Own. Martha Jones, from Doctor Who. Oh, Martha Jones, you’re a star. I had a group of college friends who I watched Doctor Who with back in the day, and they hated Martha. (Most notable exchange: one of said friends saying that she thought Martha was just “too smart” to be relatable. Said friend was a physics major.) I hope the Martha hate has cooled down now because Martha always deserves so much appreciation. She had to put up with so much in s3 (incidentally, I think about s3 sometimes and I wonder why the fuck 10 is my favorite Doctor. Honestly, he’s such a dick in s3. Martha Deserved Better.), and I’m so glad she was able to be one of the few companions in NuWho with a nontraumatic exit. I hope she’s living her best life, wherever she might be now. Ninth Doctor, from Doctor Who. Gosh I love Nine. Those same college friends who hated Martha also told me to skip s1, and I’m very glad I did not listen to them. I’ve always liked Jerks with Hearts of Gold, and Nine definitely is that! I just adore how while he had such a gruff and battle-scarred demeanor, he was so sweet and genuinely kind. He’s a puppy in a leather jacket! And not only can he be genuinely soft and sweet, but he’s also just so silly sometimes? Absolutely not what you’d expect from his general appearance but he can be quite a goofball! I love that for him! And while I may not like Doctor/Rose as a ship (honestly I just don’t tend to like Doctor/companion ships at all), his relationship with Rose was so sweet. I also just enjoy that, underneath all the weariness and the surface-level cynicism, he is actually very optimistic.  Twelfth Doctor, honestly, same deal as Nine. I’m very annoyed with people who dismiss him as being the Grumpy Doctor because he’s just so genuinely kind and compassionate? He might genuinely be one of the most compassionate Doctors I’ve ever seen. He even extends kindness to his worst enemies. There’s something really beautiful about that. Being kind, even when it might ultimately backfire on you and might not even work, because why not try? He’s just a punk rock grandpa trying his best, how can you hate that? He’s got some sick guitaring skills btw. He should join a band. (I know Peter Capaldi is in a band, so that just makes me want 12 to be in a band even more.) Sometimes I think there should be a band in the Whoniverse made up of some of the Doctor’s regens but then I get stuck on who’d be in it besides 12. Maybe 2 can be in it, with his weird flute thing. Anyway. His relationship with Clara was great (mostly because of how destructive and codependent it was lmao) but I just genuinely adore his connection with Bill. I’m always here for found family, and Bill being 12′s Earth granddaughter just warms my heart so much! Thirteenth Doctor, but actually the opposite deal of Nine and Twelve. I once saw a post saying that most Doctors can be split into one of two categories: grump with a heart of gold or charming goofball with a dark side. And, despite the two characters I just listed being in the former category, I think I tend to prefer the latter? Mostly because I see plenty of Jerks With Hearts of Gold but I feel like I don’t see as many heroic charming goofballs with a dark side. Anyway, that’s absolutely what 13 is, and I appreciate the layers that she has and am constantly annoyed at people who only see her surface level cheeriness and think that’s all there is to her. I really love it when characters Aren’t What They Seem and 13 exemplifies that. To borrow a phrase from a post I saw a very long time ago, 13 is so facile. She’s so physical, taking up so much space and constantly moving, but is so touch-averse. She talks so much and is very friendly, but is incredibly emotionally constipated and keeps even her so-called best friends at an arms length. She talks a lot about hope and compassion, but boy can she be hella violent and feral! Love That For Her. T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything) Oh absolutely. Off the top of my head: Cassandra is a lesbian. And that’s that on that. 13 is touch-averse! (Also stop yelling that she needs a hug! She doesn’t want one! It’s okay to not want hugs, that’s not a crime!) Alex can cook. Cooking isn’t even that hard?  K -Say something nice about someone in any of your fandoms Ooh, this is hard cuz there are a lot of people in any of my fandoms that I feel like I can say nice things about! Let’s go with Supergirl since I’ve been neglecting that fandom a lot. Uh. I adore @wizardofahz ‘s fics about the Superfam! I’m always craving more gen fic and she delivers! I love her characterizations of everyone, especially her characterizations of Alex and Kara. 

[tylerrjoeseph]

I haven’t used tumblr for years and idk if anyone will even remember me but ! I wanted to write up a post about my past weekend at lfcc, where i got to finally meet peter capaldi, someone I've loved and looked up to for roughly five years. I’ve seen people writing posts about me and i thought it might be nice for me to put a more detailed post up for people.

I’ve always been adamant about peter supporting the lgbtqia+ community and never doubted him for a second but the kindness he displayed for me was something i really wasn’t expecting, I arrived on the Saturday morning and decided to go straight into his autograph queue, Luckily my diamond pass was 31 and i got to queue in the first batch of people, I was maybe in the queue for like half an hour before it was my turn at the front phew, I walked up to peter and he greeted me with a big grin and said hello ect, I was worried about not getting much time with him so i decided to just tell him what i wanted to say asap, I said firstly ‘I have a really hard time with my gender identity and your doctor has constantly shown me that the universe is worth staying alive for and there’s so much important stuff to see’ and he was so humbled and kept saying how much of a privileged it was to hear that and how important it is to him that i said it, i then gave him some gifts and he said my artwork was amazing, if anyone wants to see what i gave to him here’s some tweets (x) (x), anyway, he then glanced at my print i was getting signed and looked at the dedication that said Joseph, and then asked me again what i like to be called and i explained that all of my friends call me localjoseph cause its the @ i use for everything online but i felt weird about getting him to write that so Joseph would be fine but i still don’t know what i like to be called and that i have a hard time with that, and peter smiled really huge and was like ‘thats okay cause so does the doctor!’ he then paused for AGES while closing his eyes with his head down and after like 20 seconds i asked if he was okay because i thought the man was irl buffering lol but he smiled and was like ‘yeah i’m just trying to remember something’ and then kept looking down while quietly saying ‘name to himself’, after a good 45 seconds he started writing the dedication which is SO special to me. (see below)

He wrote that not because my name is Joseph (because its not) but because i specifically said i don’t know what i want to be called, its basically letting me know that one day i will know what i want to be called and it will be heard and thats so special, like i can’t believe he took the time to write all that out, he then wrote out ‘be kind’ for me to get tattooed (x) and also signed my dreamboys vinyl which he was very shocked to find out i paid £100 for (x) (x), we then hugged and i told him i appreciate him so much and he said he really appreciate me sharing what i did with him and as i walked off he had a grin oh his face (x)

The diamond pass came with a photo op that same day so i queued up for that and went in the room with my pride flag (if you want to know why i wanted a pride flag photo op, i wrote a small thread of tweets here on why) but anyway as i walked up to him he excitedly almost yelled ‘THERE HE IS!!!!!’ and said hi a bunch, i asked him what i wanted to do for the pose and he was more than up for it, he held it up and held my hand and the photo came out so lovely, i think someone described it as ‘confident’ and that shook me, like he looks so proud in the photo. I thought that was the last time i was meeting peter so i said goodbye and he thanked me.

The next day was peters talk and i managed to get second row, at one point someone asked him how he prepared for playing a transgender role in prime suspect and his answer warmed my heart a lot, he said that he really got invested in the community and met with many trans people who were currently transitioning because he wanted to understand everything and that he understood being trans wasn’t just putting on an outfit and saying you were something else, he said that everyone he met were so brave and had the biggest hearts and how much he respected them. (psa :I don’t condone cis people playing trans parts at all, but i tend to brush this one off because of how long ago it was and i think now if asked peter would understand its not okay to take parts like that) anyway after that i knew i had to thank peter for saying that so my extra ass bought another photo op to see him again that evening.

we were in batch 17 and i thought it would be hilarious to recreate the ‘will smith and his wife’ pose with peter because i love peter a whole ton and in my head i thought it would be funny and what he deserved. I wasn’t entirely sure on how i was gonna pitch the pose to him but when i went in i saw how rushed the photos were being because it was running over slightly, so when i got there peter excitedly said hi again and i was like ‘hey listen peter i have a pose in mind’ and he said ‘yeah’ and I said ‘all you gotta do is just stand there straight and smile huge’ and he laughed and was like ‘smile huge? smile huge OKAY!’ and i just got on the floor and this happened.

after the photo was taken he was laughing and was like ‘WHAT DOES THIS MEAN’ and i said that it was based on a photo of will smith and his wife and it meant that he was amazing basically and he started beaming and said thank you. As i walked away he grabbed my hand and i turned round and said ‘thank you so much for what you said about trans people on stage earlier it really meant a lot to me’ and he said it was his pleasure while still not letting go of my hand lol, he thanked me a bunch for coming and nice it was to see me and i told him to enjoy the rest of his weekend and he FINALLY let go of my hand when i was like half way across the room to collect my photo.

if you want to see the videos of me meeting peter check here

This post was a little longer than what i expected to be but I just wanted to say that peter had absolutely no business being that kind to me, he could have just rushed through things with me and that be it but he stopped listened to me and so many others, I want you to believe me when i said that peter really cares about what you say to him and he really takes on board your presence because he remembers meeting so many people constantly after meeting thousands a day. He truly is a incredibly special human and we really don’t deserve him. I hope all of you can get to meet him one day too. check out my twitter for other candids of us meeting and stuff here 

also a small disclaimer, I don’t identify as a girl or a boy even though my expression is pretty much exclusively masc, I go by he/they pronouns ! thank you x

[stelly-fc]

Yes hi! I'm currently in a Doctor Who mood. I haven't watched this show in months... ._. Well, recently I FINALLY caught up on season 10 and 11! (Yep, only now.) I'll miss Peter Capaldi as the Doctor... ;_; I was so hooked when I found out the 12th incarnation will be a darker one. And when I saw him in action, it was like love at first sight. (Hell yeah, I'm down with these angry eyebrows. ) And excuse??? He plays the electric guitar, has sonic sunglasses, and goes through philosophical monologues??? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP!!! NEW FAVOURITE INCARNATION!!! (I wish Twelve was my philosophy teacher... If I had one now.)I fuckin cried when he died and started regenerating. I think Twelve won against Ten for most heartbreaking regeneration, I'm sorry. ;w; (Spoiler ahead  just skip to the next paragraph) First he dies "without hope, without witness, without reward" and the last place he sees is a BATTLEFIELD. He says goodbye to all his companions in a BATTLEFIELD AND HE MAKES A METAPHORE OUT OF IT HHHHHHHH! OH YEAH, that episode with the first Doctor was also gorgeous! This was an amazing final episode for Twelve! (And he made a final speech that suits him well. <3) And I’m so happy this guy got to fulfill his childhood dream 'cuz he fucking deserves it! He's an amazing actor and I'll keep on supporting him. Thank you Peter for being an amazing Doctor!    Now, hello Jodie Whittaker! As I watched season 11, I saw Thirteen as a big ball of sunshine! She's the sun after the rain. Twelve was the rain and she's the sun. You see where I'm going with this drawing?! Thirteen is basically an answer to Twelve's final speech/tips! And I love it!!! So BOOOM, INSPIRATION!!! So yeah, I think she's doing amazing so far! Beside that, season 11 really feels different with the new team. (I'll miss Steven Moffat as main writter. ;; ) But boi, the soundtrack is amazing! Throughout the episodes, I may have not felt the same feelings/goosbumps as previous episodes, but I look foward to the new season! I still enjoyed them. It was alright. :,3 (and they're starting to grow on me the more I watch them again. And omg SHE MADE HER OWN SONIC SCREWDRIVER WITH SPOONS I'M SO PROUD OF HER! <3). And the new year special gave me high hopes for 2020. Uhg do we have to wait that long... Anyway, about the drawing... I wanted it to have the same energy as this (Fun fact: It's a poster in my room.) WHICH IS WHY I MADE A DESKTOP BACKGROUND VERSION! (As you can see.) Sorry, the size is not that great but it's working for me just fine. :,3 Feel free to use it! I really don't mind!

[bareilles-tveit]

Meeting Peter Capaldi

Finally its time for my favorite meeting of the weekend.  This will overlap some with the Pearl story, but oh well.  I spent a lot of time in line just kind of watching Peter and freaking out about how close I was and the fact that I was going to meet him. After I met Pearl, we were right by the front of the line in the second room so I could watch Peter interacting with the fans who were already in line to meet him.  One of my favorite things to witness was this teenage boy who brought a guitar for him to sign.  We all watched as Peter signed it and then drew a Tardis on it and a couple of other random illustrations.  I couldn’t really hear what was being said, but after he finished signing and drawing, he picked the guitar up.  Next thing I knew I was about 10 feet away from Peter Capaldi as he settled in his seat and started to play the guitar.  If you think its hot on tv, just imagine seeing it in person.  I was dying a little on the inside.  The rest of the interactions were fairly normal, but I loved watching the way he’d shake people’s hands and devote his entire attention to the person in front of him.  The line slowly but surely whittled down in front of us.  He easily spent a minimum of five minutes with each person in line which is pretty incredible for a star of his stature to take that much time for everyone.  I thought given the number of people in front of us that we would easily be able to meet him before he took his break, but I was definitely wrong.  

There was this young woman in front of us who was absolutely freaking out about meeting him.  It was her first con experience and she had never met anyone famous and her first go at it was meeting the freaking doctor. Myself and a volunteer kept talking to her telling her that it would be fine, he was just a person and there was nothing to be nervous about.  If only I could have seen into the future a bit to know how much I would be eating my words later.  

Anyways Peter finished up with an autograph a little after when he was scheduled to take a break and he looked at the volunteer and then the line directly in front of him before glancing over at us in the other room.  I could hear him ask the volunteer “how many more people are in line.”  The volunteer told him about 20 and he thought for a second before the volunteer told him, “its definitely break time.” He looked over in our direction once more and we kind of made eye contact so I decided to say “And breathe….” He grinned at me and took a deep breath and then slumped down as if to lay his head on the table.  He was down for the briefest of moments before he popped back up and winked at me before giving me a grin.  I swear my heart was about to beat out of my chest at that interaction.

He had been signing autographs for about 2 hours at that point and the poor man did look pretty tired.  He was sitting in his chair and doing the signing while wearing a t-shirt, but there was a blazer hanging on a chair behind him and he stood up to put it on.  Again, I was melting inside as I watched him do it. Once he got it situated he looked back over at us and said, “I’m terribly sorry to leave, but I’ve been doing this for quite a while and I need a little break.”  He finished buttoning the blazer and then waved to us a few more times and went out a door.  

This was when Liz got a re-entry pass so she could go get dinner and Brittany and I went to go talk to Pearl for a bit more.  I also watched Evangeline Lilly interact with her fans for a bit while Peter was gone. She seems like an absolute sweet heart and even with her hair pulled up in a pony tail, was one of the most stunning people I’ve ever seen in real life.  Liz made it back into the room and shortly afterwords Peter came back in.  He looked like a brand new person, after taking a little rest.  He took of his blazer and I took a few horrible pictures of him from the other room, that I will cherish because it’s a reminder of how incredible this day was. He settled his blazer over the chair and then sat back down stretching his arms a bit before calling the next person forward.  We didn’t get to move over to the other room for a little bit so I got to continue to watch him interact with everyone.  I probably watched him interact with 20-30 different people.

When we were told to move across the room to the short part of the line, I spoke to the person in charge of handling the money and selected the photo I wanted Peter to sign.  While I was talking to him, Pearl’s handler started teasing Brittany and Liz saying they needed to get out of line if they weren’t going to pay up.  I turned to him and pointed to my eyes and then him to show I was watching him and he just laughed.  In regards to Peter’s autograph I will say it was pretty disappointing that he was charging an extra $30 to personalize the autograph, but I get it.  

I got to watch the young girl who was so nervous interact with him and was relieved to see that she completely kept her composure and handled it like a pro.  Peter’s a very soft spoken man and he kind of has a resting bitch face, but when he smiles it lights up his entire face.  We were talking about this later and we think he knows that he comes across as harsh and that’s why he winks and smiles so frequently.  As we were waiting for our turn, the woman directly in front of us turned around and said, “His accent is making me die, I can’t believe I’m hearing it in person.” I have to say I 100% agree with her.

While I was waiting for my turn a volunteer was finishing up her shift and she was getting an autograph from her.  It was really sweet to watch him interact with her and tell her how lovely it was to meet her and give her a hug.  At this point, I was right up at the front of the table and was able to see everything he was doing with the last few people in front of me.  He always drew something on everyone’s autograph which was super adorable.  The guy two people in front of me was someone he recognized (no idea if it was from a panel or a photo op or what) but I thought it was impressive and sweet that Peter remembered him and said that it was lovely to see him again.  

The girl in front of my finished up, and I kind of stood there frozen in my spot until I took a deep breath and moved forward.  I slid my photograph over to him and said “Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii” basically just like how it looks.  He looked up at me and smiled and held his hand out so that I could shake it.  My memory gets a little fuzzy here because I was seriously freaking out.  I’m virtually positive I looked like an idiot in front of him, but oh well.  I can remember telling him that I was very excited when he was announced as the Doctor because “The Thick of It” is one of my absolute favorite television shows.  And I loved his portrayal of Malcolm Tucker. He smiled and thanked me and told me that if I enjoyed The Thick of It, then I should really enjoy his next project because he was working with the creator again and he was really looking forward to it.  I can remember smiling and telling him I’d have to look out for it.  He asked me what my name was and I told him it was Heather and I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face when he wrote it on my autograph and wrote a little message.  The photo I selected was a solo shot of him with a lot of sky in the background and as I continued to talk to him he drew stars all over the sky.  I’m pretty sure I just rambled about how much I adored him in everything I’ve seen him in.  

At this point Brittany jumps in to help me out and says, “This is your first time at Dragon con right.” Peter responded that yes it was and he was having a lovely time.  Brittany motions towards me and says, “its her first time too.”  Peter’s attention snapped back to me and he said, “Oh really?”  I told him “Yeah and that he was the one person I really wanted to see, and he was kind of my reason for coming because he meant so much to me.” My brain could hardly keep up with everything that I wanted to say and I’m pretty sure I kept rambling about things when he said, “Oh thank you so much.  I can’t believe that, come here and give me a hug.  I can’t let you go without a hug.”  Guys he was sitting in the middle of the table and I stood there kind of dumb struck and started to lean forward to hug him when I realized he was walking towards the end of the table.  He didn’t just mean hug me over the table he meant come meet me halfway and get a real hug.  

Once I realized what was about to happen I started to cry as I walked down to where he was walking towards me.  I started to hug him gently, but he wrapped his arms tightly around me and I kind of nuzzled my face into his chest without even thinking.  He must have realized that I was crying because he was hugging me tightly and rubbing circles on my back.  He pulled back and looked at me and I’m pretty sure I just said, “oh my goodness thank you so much, this means the world to me.  Thank you so so much.”  He smiled and squeezed my shoulder and said, “No thank you.” I think I rambled a bit more and he shook my friends hands and then went back to sit in his chair.

Tears were rolling down my cheeks as I walked out of the room and Liz wisely suggested I step to the side to take a minute.  The second she did, I started crying harder and Brittany and Liz started crying with me.  A volunteer came over and asked, “You Okay,” and I tried to explain that I was fine I just couldn’t believe that Peter Capaldi had just hugged me.  I watched him interact with like 30 other people and he didn’t hug any of them, but there was something in me that made him want to hug me and I don’t know what that was, but I’m so grateful for the experience. I only wish we were allowed to take photos and Brittany or Liz could have gotten a picture of it.  He was so unbelievably kind and gentle and I can honestly say I’ve never walked away from an interaction feeling so loved or appreciated.

I’ve met a lot of people at cons or stage dooring.  People that have meant a lot to me and if you had asked me in advance if Peter Capaldi would be the one that would break me, I would have said you were crazy.  That if I kept my cool while meeting David Tennant and Aaron Tveit I would be fine with Capaldi.  But I can’t even explain what meeting Capaldi was like.  It was so much more than I ever dreamed and I feel so blessed. Even now a week later, I don’t fully understand it or how much it meant to me but I still smile and get teary eyed just thinking about it.    

During the panel that we were able to attend he said that his favorite thing about Doctor Who was getting to meet people whose lives have truly been touched by his character. Maybe that’s what he saw in me, I just wanted to compliment him and tell him how much I adored him.  I never in a million years thought he would be thanking me or giving me a hug.  I didn’t buy a photo op because I was struggling with how expensive it was and I was concerned about the con being so large and being able to get to the photo op in time.  And once I got down there I was regretting my decision about not doing the photo op.  But after everything, I know that if I had done the photo op I wouldn’t have been able to afford the autograph.  And I wouldn’t have traded my 5 minute conversation and hug for a 30 second interaction and a picture.  I’m so grateful that I made the decision I did because what I got from him meant so much more than any photo ever could have. I hope he’ll come to another con near me again and I can talk to him about this experience and how much he touched my life in that short span of time.  And maybe that time I’ll be able to get a photo.  

The rest of the night I kept walking around just saying, “my heart is so full” over and over again. And it was and it is even now just thinking about it.  Thank you Peter Capaldi for being you and thank you for being amazing.  You made every ounce of anxiety and stress and nervousness about the size of Dragon Con 100% worth it.  And I hope you know just how thankful I am.

[mrsmacmaroon-blog]

New Year’s Resolutions

I know we’ve not even gotten past Christmas yet but, irregardless, we’re approaching the end of 2018. Also, seeing as I’m working Christmas Eve, Boxing day, the day after that and then going up North for New Year’s, I figured I might as well get this out while I’m thinking of it.

So, I know as well as any that it’s highly unlikely to hold onto resolutions. For example, I resolve to make healthier choices and read more every year but always end up putting it off because ‘it’s still the holiday season so it’s time to relax and indulge’ or ‘exams are coming up so I can’t possibly read anything other than my textbooks’.

I’ve lost 2 stone this year, something I’m incredibly proud of and something I hope doesn’t reverse because it feels great to be able to fit into a dress I haven’t worn for literally 5 years and I generally just feel more comfortable with myself now. Don’t get me wrong, I liked myself when I was a bit chunkier and was actually pretty confident, but I respect myself more now that I can actually exercise willpower- something I’ve never been able to do for as long as I can remember. But instead of food, cigarettes have found a place in my hand and that is most definitely not a healthy choice. 

I also need to start exercising more. In between work and uni, I walk an awful lot so that can burn loads of calories and I feel great and get a good night’s sleep, but I’d really like to take up a sport or try running again. I tried running at the beginning of 2017 with the help of my ex-neighbour and it felt great to get up that early and do something that productive. But I eventually started getting lazier and lazier and wouldn’t wake up. So, running lasted perhaps a grand total of 4-6 weeks. I also found it to be an excuse to eat the shitty sausage baps my old school used to serve so that didn’t help the weight issue particularly.

Onto this subject of reading more. Last year, for pleasure, I read a grand total of: 

1 book.

That’s right, The Ice Cream Girls, I don’t even remember who the killer was in the end because it took me two months to read it. But I’m not keeping my resolutions as things just for January. I feel like I’m at the point where I’d prefer to read non-fiction. I want to become a more well-rounded person and not rely so much on the internet for entertainment. And I love stories about real people because I often find I can attach myself more to the story as it is real. The only fictitious universes I’ve ever lost myself in were Jacqueline Wilson’s and JK Rowling’s. I used to love reading so it makes me sad that I don’t do it much anymore but I know that now when I read it just feels like a race to the end that meant I hadn’t fully enjoyed the story and then an overwhelming sense of satisfaction that comes with reaching the end which means I don’t want to pick up another book. 

My most recent book purchase has been Mercury and Me by Jim Hutton and I’m so excited to get into it because to get a glimpse of Freddie Mercury, a man I’ve idolised my whole life, and the man he loved seems incredibly intimate and just exciting!!!

Oh yeah I also need to watch the news more often because I missed so much this year and caught on so late, for example, I only learnt about a month ago that they cast a woman for Doctor Who! To be fair, I haven’t watched the show since the first episode of Peter Capaldi really (who I hadn’t realised had gone either, whoops) but still I'm sure that that would’ve kicked up some controversy. Also, wtf is going on in Parliament. I saw a headline saying ‘Corbyn could be PM by Wednesday’ and then there was a vote of no confidence that didn’t work and we still have no clue what’s going on with Brexit. I used to be up-to-date with all of this because I used to study politics but ever since I’d sat that exam and jetted off on my holiday I’ve turned a blind eye to it all. Even forgot the number of MPs in Parliament the other day. Embarrassing.

Anyway, this is all very rambly and I’m coughing up a lung so should probably go to bed.

TTFN

PS. I also need to knuckle down with my studies, clean my room (and keep it clean!) and be better with money!!!

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Top 3 doctors? As in from dr who lol not casualty or holby

Keeping in mind that I've only seen the revival series so far:

1. Twelve. Where do I even start? Love him, love his era, love his companions (ok, I can take or leave Nardole but Clara and Bill are both GREAT characters). I love how visibly autistic he is (all the Doctors are autistic in my mind, or whatever the alien equivalent of autism would be anyway, but Twelve is especially obvious and also acts most like me so yeah), and, on a related note, how throughout his run he consistently has someone basically taking on a caregiver role to him (Clara in series 8 and 9 - as she points out herself - and Nardole in series 10) and it's just like... no big deal. (Sidenote, isn't it weird how TV show writers can be like "yeah, OK, that's fine and no big deal, we can have a main character like that" when an alien character needs someone to support him, but just about every human autistic character in media who needs the exact same thing is a side character depicted as a burden whose only personality trait is needing to be taken care of?) As everyone's probably figured out, I adore his relationship with Clara, I think it's the most romantic thing ever (him punching through the diamond wall over and over for her... ❤) (not saying their relationship was at all healthy, lol, but I still love it). Also, Peter Capaldi is just a fucking brilliant actor.

2. Thirteen. I don't have as much to say about her, but I love her. Especially since she's the first Doctor I saw.

3. ...I don't know. I guess either Eleven or Nine, since Ten is my least favourite (I don't hate him, he has some great episodes, he just doesn't appeal to me that much personally) and we didn't see much of John Hurt's or Jo Martin's Doctors (although I can, and do, still hope for more Jo Martin!). Evidently I need to watch some of the classic stuff so I can write a better list.