#anyway tbd
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so glad to hear that my 17 year old sister is hanging out with 20 year olds who are buying her alcohol, but its fine actually and i just have a stick up my ass?
#tf?#direct quote from my dad: but youre 26 and your best friend is 29 its the same age gap its the same#how. on what planet is it the same.#theres a fucking wealth of experience and knowledge between 17 and 20#like. be so fucking for real.#really dont want to have to say i told you so?#anyway tbd
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hm
#having a number of people who follow me for butch things makes it difficult for me to feel comfortable posting abt my problems w dating#but like. why are seemingly none of the guys i end up feeling things for into masculine women.#when is it my turn to be happy real#anyway tbd#personal
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i wanna draw astarion and fenris i wanna draaw GAY fuckkdnging elves ...
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okay I spent the whole morning working on the dayroom and I think it’s slowly coming along. my mom hung the dry erase board during her visit and I am sooo pleased with it (I love a massive dry erase board!!). I put together that lightweight little bookshelf/console thing and ordered some cute little fabric storage baskets for the bottom shelf so I can hide some of the office supply clutter. I’m not sure yet what I’m going to do with those two little strips of wall by my desk but I’m leaning towards doing a little fandom corner. in my austin apartment I had these picture ledges where I put fandom-related photos/art/cards from friends and it always made me so happy to look at. plus you could swap stuff out and move it around really easily when you needed a change. I was thinking I might recreate that on a smaller scale on one of the walls (maybe the one next to the desk?) and then do a mini gallery wall on the wall right over the desk, which could be a mix of My Hockey Guy photos and family/friend photos. I ordered some possible shelves to try so we’ll see! and then I have this wonderful banner bec snagged for me at a game, which I just steamed the wrinkles out of and am trying to decide where I want to put it.
I just have one big update planned after that, which is that I ordered a giant mirror on mega sale to hang over the couch. it should arrive next friday hurrah! and I think/hope it will go a long way towards brightening and opening up that space. I really love my place but its one flaw is the deep 1970s-style overhangs over the windows that block most of the limited natural light we get in the winter 😩 combine that with the ‘70s-style lack of good overhead lighting and it can make that room feel pretty dark, especially on overcast days like today. anyway I’m excited! that poor room has suffered from me mentally associating it with a job I h*te so it’s spent a lot of time being a cluttered and unkempt dumping ground even though it’s one of the nicer rooms in the house. I’m trying to make it look more appealing + spend more time in there when I’m not working so that I don’t lose a whole room to my work dread lol.
#house tag#i want to get rid of the old couch in there too and get something with a lighter fabric maybe#but I’m holding off to see what my🤰timeline might be#as I may want to convert part of the room into a nursery/playroom eventually#or a guest bedroom if my mom ends up staying with me for a while#anyway tbd#I’m feeling great about house stuff#i still think the living room is my crowning achievement#the green is so perfect - just the right balance of playful and soothing#and I love the accent colors#and the gallery wall#and the thriving plant wall#it just feels very very Like Me and it’s my favorite room in the house to hang out in#the kitchen is a close second although it’s one of those rooms where I still look around and am like hmm one or two more tweaks#would make this room perfect#I’m just not sure what they are#but it’ll come to me in time
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I'm watching ep3 of Yuri on Ice again and wow, Viktor having Yuuri skate Eros really is so fucking wild to me. On the one hand: reasonable choice. Viktor wants Yuuri to surprise the audience. He knows Yuuri can perform like this (cough banquet cough) and he knows that Yuuri capitalizing on this potential could win him the season.
On the other hand: oh my God. Does Viktor want to torture himself.
Listen: Yurio says Viktor was contemplating choreographies for himself during the past season. So, Viktor's been thinking about Love as a theme for himself. Man is 27. Everyone's asking him if / when he'll retire. He's considering his future. He's been thinking about love. He's considering his future he's been thinking about love He takes a season off, flies to Japan -- for Yuuri--,, he has Yuuri (who ran away from Viktor's flirting in ep2!) skate Erotic love. (aka the emotion he didn't return to Viktor during Viktor's first days in Japan ((aka an emotion that Viktor's been thinking about for a while (((aka an emotion Viktor believes Yuuri can pull off (because he's SEEN Yuuri pull it off (((at the FUCKING BANQUET where he flirted on Viktor THEN DISAPPEARED))))).
TL;DR this Russian knows how to pine.
#this all leans heavily on the seductress story Viktor tells being a meta parallel to the banquet#aka a theory i read 5+ years ago and havent checked in on since lolol#sorry if this is so incorrevt i just. we spontaneously rewayching Yoi and writing as we go#anyway#viktor nikiforov#please leg him be a yearning sadsack i love this for him#yuri on ice#yuuri on ice#yoi#yoi thoughts#my words#yoi meta#OH MY GOD WAIT Y U U R I IS TBD ONE WHO MSKES UP THE SEDUCTRESS STORY???!?? WHST TJE FUCK---#Freudian motherfucker
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i find a lot of enjoyment writing a semi-canon accurate post-crisis relationship between dick and jason because there’s so much like…. violent loss of a legacy? dick is forcibly replaced by jason, and jason is forcibly replaced by a suit in a glass case
they understand each other intrinsically. they have never been more different. dick knows bruce like no one else. jason knows bruce will never kill. dick killed the joker with his bare hands. jason does not know this. they circle around and around biting each other’s tails. dick will do anything to protect the people he loves. that includes jason. that includes protecting jason from himself. they both see that protection as smothering, and a fundamental loss of control. they claw at the cage, but shy away from its open door.
#ive progressed to the dickbrotherhood prequel fic#anyways#dick grayson#dc comics#jason todd#spokes#tbd#persephone tag
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Actual footage of me during that scene:
Though if I'm being honest it's actually a couple scenes later when you see his axe disspating in the morning light that fucks me up. That's all the goodbye we get and I'm supposed to recover from that??
[ @cfs-melkire ]
#still took it better than alannah though#BUT ALSO LETS TALK ABOUT HOW HE IS ASKING HIS ONCE ENEMY THAT HE TRIED DESPERATELY TO KILL TO SAVE HIS WORLD#HE KNOWS HE CANT DO IT HE NEEDS YOU TO EVEN THOUGH HE ONCE WRONGED YOU VERY BADLY#THE TRUST THERE#THE AGONY#anyway im normal#tbd
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“You can’t come after me just because I’m an ‘easier’ target!”
#last eel posting for the day before jamil kicks my ass#anyways. hi this is yuuyu and floyd ;;#also yuuyu is not a yuu/mc he's just. named yuuyu#and he's a twst tinkerbell#anyways i think it's so funny that tinkerbell canonically also turns red when she's mad#SHIT DOES FLOYD CANONICALLY ALREADY CALL SOMEONE PUFFERFISH#i might have to double check later#<- edit: he doesn't (i think) phew#[—✦-#-✧ my art#twst art#twisted wonderland#twst#floyd leech#twst oc x canon#floyd leech x oc#twst oc#twst tinkerbell#(💚) yuuyu#aight i need a ship name stat#something something with bells or tinkering or something#floyd's a shoe person too#uhhhh idk#this will be tbd ;;;#-✦—]#*looks at to-do list*#i also have. an essay and an extra cred assignment due at midnight#(in 7 and a half hours)#gotta lock in#bye bye wish me luck-
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at the end of the day it's a relationship that inspired me to create again, to making edits and icons and even writing
it's the relationship that helped me get through some really hard times in my life
its the relationship I met really amazing people through who I now have the joy of calling my friends
#tbd#im crying yes I know but ive been so depressed#my life has been shit the last two months and this was my escape#like I know eventually this wont hurt as much and its just this week#and that ive made friendships that outlast a fandom#but Im still going to be sad#not to mention its like????#people have been harassed and sent death threats and was accused of faking cancer and we went through it together#idk this is rambling im just very very sad#ill find something new again I know but its just a lot right now#anyways I might take a break if you want to share discords if we are friends message me#911 spoilers
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Jack Quaid as Boimler | Strange New Worlds: Those Old Scientists
#those sparkly fanboy eyes have bewitched me#i need to see him cry#ANYWAY#cara gifs#bradward boimler#jack quaid#lower decks#strange new worlds#those old scientists#that one piece of hair out of place is so perfect#how dare they#his little excited bounce???#i mean cmon#[some thirsty tag tbd]#baby boims
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have i mentioned how much i love drawing lycaon and his arms and his legs and his everything and
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it just feels so weird and silly to sleep on my mattress on the ground in the kitchen for some reason
me: i need to fucking sleep also me: my followers numbers ends with 69 hihihihih
#had to empty my bedroom and play tetris with the rest of my apartment#some dudes are coming over tomorrow to demolish/redo my bedroom's ceiling#so i'm camping in my kitchen i guess lol it's the only space the mattress fits#more like dining room#anyway tbd
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Period dramas used to have keira knightley...
#we used to be a society#now they're just casting people for clout#based on instagramers and tiktokers 😑#anyway...#period dramas need appropriate faces imma start commiting crimes#tbd
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this game will literally tell you anything except acknowledge the thing that started morrigan's reputation. she's had more lovers than there are trees in the forest but she's NOT A HERO OF THE FIFTH BLIGHT OR ANYTHING.
#tbd#bioware critical#datv spoilers#i'm trying ok i'm really trying but this is just upsetting that's it#suddenly morrigan has a reputation of apparently having fucked more people than there are trees in the forest#when has that ever been her character i'm sorry this feels misogynistic to me? what you have a woman with a mysterious reputation#which means she's fucked a lot of people?#you know flemeth has other daughters. daughters like yavana#like just use one of them leave morrigan out of this#my poor girl look at what they want you to be in their world#fae plays datv#every time I start getting into this game and enjoying it it reminds me just how much it wants to disrespect returning characters#and its like you have this shitty note here to give you more morrigan info but all it wants to do is give you this drivel#it's like she didn't even exist to these people who wrote this game before inquisition#anyway bellara's and harding's personal quests save me bellara's and harding's quests
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i <3 people who complain about "tumblr poetry" being trite & cliché when they have never had an original artistic thought really its great
#now say something nice & true etc etc#like i get being annoyed by the oversaturation of certain themes & motifs in art but what are You doing? making snarky posts on tumblr.com#congratulations#like id much rather read a thousand poems about love cannibalism guts etc etc than another of those annoying ass posts ngl#anyway#tbd
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Y'all…I'm having a very disturbing realization dawn upon me. I don't really have a way of articulating this clearly yet, but I wanted to bring it up in case other people know about it:
I'm noticing that many people (namely white Americans) seem to act as branded-versions of themselves rather than who they genuinely are. Specifically, what I'm beginning to understand how insanely pernicious it is. I knew it existed because I grew up in it, but didn't realize how uncanny it actually looks when you watch it happen, nor what the implications are that we do this instead of connecting with each other as people.
It seems like any descriptor under the sun can become a brand, so long as it's understood that way more than it's understood as just a descriptor. "Man" is a brand. "Punk" is a brand. "Conservative" is a brand. "Left" is a brand. "Queer" is a brand. "Protestant" is a brand. "Catholic" is a brand. "Anticapitalist" is a brand. "Young professional" is a brand. "Good" is a brand. Words like "BIPOC" are also interpreted within a brand context.
I'm not sure if this is something that has always been there, but I only just noticed? Or if it's on the rise with commercialization? A bit of both? Something else?
#zan speaks#humanitarian issues#I am legit on the fence about posting this#but wanted to try anyway#feel free to ask for clarification is something isn't making sense#tbd#maybe#also I'm not trying to trap anyone into discourse with this I just genuinely want to know
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