#anyway sorry i have cassidy on the mind lately

[ladyseidr]

i think michael and cassidy should vibe if only because they are both deeply angry, traumatized kids who dream about nothing more than getting the hell out of hurricane (and they never will)

[elm-writes-stories]

Cuphead: Isle of Memories (Rewrite)

*Hey guys! Happy New Year! I'm sorry that I've published this late! I've been busy with work and had been running into a writer's block, but I'm back! Anyway, this episode is published on January 1, 2024. If you guys like this chapter, don't be afraid to heart, reblog, and comment! That would be greatly appreciated! Happy New Year and let's hope this year will be a good year! Enjoy!*

Episode Eleven: Turning Up the Charm

Today was a relaxing day for once in Mugman’s life.

No demons. No Tremaine.

Just him reading a story with Cassidy sitting on his lap to read. Her purring were the only sounds that he could listen to all day. Now, he wished every day could be like this. It didn’t help he was sitting on the bean bag in the corner of the library Djimmi made.

She was resting her eyes while they were reading, which was causing him to fall asleep reading the story with her. And he didn’t mind as long as she was in his arms. But he could’ve sworn he would accidentally drop the book falling asleep like this. He started to move around to close the book, which woke her up a little.

“Oh, sorry,” Mugman whispered to her while putting the book back on the shelf.

“It’s okay,” she said tiredly, cuddling her head on his shoulder. Her paws were making biscuits on his shirt with a content smile.

Once he put the book away, he leaned back so that she could get comfortable laying on him. A smile formed his face. He began resting his eyes and holding her in his arms.

Before he could sink into a deep sleep, Chalice appeared by his side as a ghost.

“Mugsy!” Chalice shouted with a sudden urgency, waking both Mugman and Cassidy up with yelps and jolts.

Mugman took a few deep breaths with a groan. “Chalice…”

“I have a crisis,” Chalice replied. “It’s urgent…and, uh, private.”

“Private?” Mugman questioned.

Chalice nodded her head. “I promise it’ll be real quick.”

“Okay…” Mugman moved a little while Cassidy scooted off of him. “I’ll be back.”

“Okay,” Cassidy said while watching him get up from the bean bag.

He felt his legs ache from letting Cassidy sit on his lap for too long. He shook off the aches and followed Chalice around the corner away from Cassidy.

“So, what exactly do you need from me?” Mugman questioned.

“I’ll tell you in a minute,” Chalice stated. Once they got away from Cassidy, she turned to him. “Okay, there’s been something that has been bothering me and you’re the only one…well, besides Cuphead by now, that knows what to do.”

“Uh…know what to do about what?”

“Ya know? Uh…this…um…well, you know how you are when ya first met Cassi.”

Mugman tilted his head for a moment until he realized what she was talking about. Then he smirked teasingly at her. “Yeah?”

“Well, let’s say that there’s a fella who knew how to play the violin, fix some things, and he’s a nerd when it comes to myths and legends. I dont’ know if he likes me back the same way though,” she responded.

He blinked in shock. “I thought he already likes ya.”

She blushed. “He does?!”

“Yeah, I thought that was obvious.”

“Wait, we’re talkin’ about the same guy, right?” she asked.

“Canteen Hughes?” Mugman inquired.

“Yeah, we’re talkin’ about the same guy,” she said.

He arched a brow. “And you like him back.”

“Well, yeah…I mean, I think he’s neat. I dunno how this works. You and Cuphead might be the only two ding-dongs I know that knows about this kind of feeling,” Chalice replied. “Ugh, now I realize why Saltbaker kept saying he’s my future boyfriend.”

“Okay, okay, calm down,” Mugman responded while rubbing his hands. “Maybe you can ask him out on a date.”

“Oh, like you did with Cassi?”

“Yeah.”

“Good one. But if I were to ask him out on the date, it has to be spectacular!”

“Uh, well, it doesn’t have to be—”

“I know! We can start arguing and then not getting along until finally we confess our feelings for each other and we are dating officially!” Chalice replied.

“Uhhh, I’m not sure that’s how romance works—”

It was sudden that Cuphead zoomed into the scene with a panicked look on his face. “Hey, Mugsy! I just asked Nat out on a date and she said yes! What do I do now?!”

“Whoa, whoa, one at a time!” Mugman shouted until he noticed his brother’s legs bruised. “Wait, what happened to your legs, Cuphead?”

“Uh…it’s a long story,” Cuphead answered nervously.

“Wait, you asked Nat out on a date?” Chalice questioned with a gasp.

“Yeah,” Cuphead responded nervously.

Chalice’s smile brightened. “Way to go, Cups! I knew you had it in you! Now, I have a question for you. How did you do it?”

“Do what?” Cuphead asked.

“Ask her out on a date?” Chalice persisted.

“I dunno. We got ourselves into a dangerous situation and kind of confessed our feelings to each other. I mean, we kissed on the lips first and then I asked her out on a date,” Cuphead responded.

“Wait, what?!” Chalice and Mugman gasped.

“You jumped into it?!” Mugman shouted.

“No, she kissed first!” Cuphead said immaturely.

“Aww,” Chalice replied. “Wait, you said you were in a dangerous situation?”

“Yeah?” Cuphead uttered.

“And you confessed to each other about your feelings?”

“Yes.”

She pondered for a moment and then smirked mischievously. “That gives me an idea.”

“Wait, Mugman, which one of you kiss on the lips first? You or Cassi?” Cuphead asked.

“We haven’t kiss each other on the lips yet,” Mugman answered sheepishly.

“WHAT?! You two have been together all this time and haven’t kissed each other on the lips yet?!” Cuphead yelled.

“Not so loud, Cuphead!” Mugman whispered harshly to his brother.

Chalice groaned impatiently. “Can we get back to the matter at hand?”

Mugman nodded. “Yes, yes, please.”

“How did you two ding-dongs get those girls to like ya? Let alone letting girls kiss ya first?” Chalice asked the brothers.

The cup brothers were silent for a moment while looking at each other. Then they glanced back at Chalice.

“I dunno,” Cuphead responded.

“Yeah, me neither,” Mugman replied.

Chalice slapped her forehead with a sigh in discouragement. “I thought you both would be more experts on romance.”

“Chalice, I just asked Nat out on a date. I don’t know how I got her to even like me,” Cuphead responded. “I mean, I did tell her how I feel about her.”

“Yeah, I did the same to Cassidy…although I thought I was confessing it to you,” Mugman said while looking at his brother.

“Hey, at least, you got together with Cassi thanks to me,” Cuphead replied with a smirk.

“So, I guess I got to tell him how I feel then,” Chalice replied, pondering. “While turning up that charm of acting like a ding-dong! That’s what I’ll do! I get him to come with me on a perilous journey, get trapped in a cave with him, confess to him on how I feel, and then ask him on a date. Or kiss him on the lips first and then ask him out on a date. Whichever works!”

“Uh,” the brothers uttered.

“Thanks, fellas! Wish me luck!” Chalice said as she flew away.

Cuphead and Mugman froze and looked at each other.

“Should we go after her?” Cuphead questioned.

“Nah, she’ll be fine,” Mugman responded and shifted his attention back to Cuphead. “Soooo, you asked Nat on the date, huh?”

“Uh, yeah,” Cuphead said with a blush. “Mind helpin’ me out?”

“Helping out?”

The cup brothers turned to see Cassidy walking to them.

“Oh, Cassi,” Mugman replied excitedly and hurried over to her. “Sorry I was taking so long to get back to you.”

“It’s okay,” she said with a smile. “I was wondering about what’s happenin’ with Chalice.”

“She’s on her own journey. Say, maybe you could help us,” Mugman suggested to his girlfriend.

“Ooh, help with what?” Cassidy asked excitedly.

“You see, Cuphead just asked Nat out on a date,” Mugman replied.

“Hey, no need on tellin’ the whole world about it,” Cuphead responded defensively.

“Shush,” Mugman replied, continuing to talk to Cassidy. “I’m going to get Cuphead a nice suit for his date. Do you think you would want to help Natalie with getting ready for the date? Kind of like what they did with us?”

Cassidy seemed uneasy for a moment, which was noticed by Mugman.

“Oh, you don’t have to help if you don’t want to,” Mugman replied.

“No, I want to,” Cassidy said. “It’s just…I’m never a fashion expert. Natalie knows more than I do and I feel like I’m going to mess it up for her.”

“You won’t,” Mugman said softly. “I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

Cassidy thought about it. Her ears perked as soon as an idea struck her. “Ooh! I know someone else who’s a fashion expert!”

The red feline kissed Mugman on the cheek and ran off with a newfound determination.

Mugman gazed at her with a lovey-dovey smile.

Cuphead rubbed his arm. “So, are you gonna help me pick out a suit?”

“Yeah!” Mugman said excitedly. “Right this way, my dear brother!”

Cuphead walked with Mugman while rolling his eyes.

~.~

 Canteen had been trying to get back into building things in his tent.

Ever since he was a kid, he had a mechanic family that didn’t have a happy family. Remembering those families that died all those years ago still brought him back to that trauma. However, he wanted to build something…something like a plane.

Canteen had been drawing on a blueprint paper of all the screws and parts needed to build a plane on his wooden desk, but his mind started to drift off today.

Instead of drawing screws, he drew a face on the blueprint. His pencil outlined the details of the person’s face and he found himself drawing Chalice. It appeared to be accurate to the detail. He kept drawing her face, including her eyes and her dimples when she smiled. Then he drew her torso and a skirt she always wore since he first met her. Her heels were last. A smile came on his face as he drew more in detail.

“Whatcha drawin’?” A familiar cheery voice spoke beside him.

Canteen jumped with a yelp and covered the drawing of Chalice. He looked over his shoulder to find Chalice floating next to him.

“Uh…nothing. Nothing…j-just working on a new project,” Canteen stuttered with his face red.

“Ooh, can I see?” Chalice asked excitedly.

“Uh…i-it’s not really complete yet.”

“That’s okay. I don’t mind seein’ it anyway. Unless you don’t want me too—”

“No! No, uh, I just…uh, haven’t sketch the full picture yet.”

She turned into her physical form with a bright grin. “Well, you can show me it when you’re ready! But, on a fun side of things, I got an adventure we both can go on! Together!”

“T-Together? As in me and you together?”

“Yep! I heard that there’s a really cool place that we can explore together! It’s about…maybe thirty miles from this place. What d’ya say we go and see what’s there?”

Canteen blushed at the thought of going with Chalice someplace. “Um…yeah, sure.”

“Alright! Let’s go!” Chalice started to walk away.

“Wait,” Canteen urged while leaving the blueprint behind. “Where are we going exactly?”

“Well, that’s for me to know and you to find out,” she said with a wink.

He blushed and followed her out of the camp.

~.~

Natalie had been pacing in front of the ship with her anxious thoughts running through her liquid mind. She couldn’t believe she said yes to dating Cuphead. First, she kissed him and then she accepted his offer for a date.

She had been many dates before because her mother forced her too and most of them were little boys richer than her. Or guys that were way older than she liked to admit. And of course, she chased away the dates who were boys her age. She always thought it was them, but now she believed it to be her once she realized how badly she mistreated Cassidy. Natalie couldn’t believe that it took Cassidy being under the Devil’s control to wake her up.

“Natalie—”

Natalie screeched and spun around to find Cassidy behind her. She grabbed her chest and sighed in relief. “Oh, Cassi, it’s just you. Sorry, I was thinking about stuff.”

Cassidy gave her a smirk. “About your date with Cuphead?”

Natalie’s face turned redder than a tomato. “How did you—?”

“Cuphead told Mugman and Mugman told me,” the red cat said.

“Oh,” Natalie uttered while rubbing her arm nervously.

“And I came to help you get ready for your date. You know, the same way you helped me get ready for a date with Mugman.”

Natalie frowned. “You remembered that?”

“Of course I remembered,” Cassidy said. She noticed Natalie’s frown. “Are you okay?”

“I didn’t think you would remember what I’ve done that was good.”

Cassidy softened her gaze. “Well, I would be lying if I said that you never did anything to help me.”

“Yeah, but I—”

“I want to forget the past.”

Natalie glanced up at her friend in shock. “But—”

“You have done horrible things to me in the past,” Cassidy said softly. “I stuck around you, because you were the only friend my age who even tolerated me at the time. I feel like I have to want to do things with you so that I can be around you. Or do the things only you want to do just to be around you. But you’ve changed. I’ve noticed that you’re not like that anymore.”

Natalie widened her eyes more.

“I don’t hate you, Natalie. I’ve never hated you. I’m always going to be your friend…I’ve always made that promise to you. But I want to forget about what happened in the past. It brings pain to even talk about it.”

Natalie softened her gaze and nodded. “Okay. I just want to say I’m sorry…for everything.”

“I forgive you.”

There was silence as both of the friends exchanged soft smiles.

“Now,” Cassidy began excitedly. “Let’s pick a cute dress for you.”

“But you don’t like clothes shopping,” Natalie pointed out.

Cassidy grinned. “Well, I know someone who knows about fashion. C’mon!”

She grabbed Natalie by the wrist, pulling her away from the ship and hurrying away to pick a cute outfit for her.

~.~

“Are you sure you know where you’re going?” Canteen asked while strolling through the forest with Chalice.

“Oh, I’m sure of it,” Chalice said while looking for a cave around them to get trapped in.

Canteen didn’t seem convinced by Chalice’s answer. He looked around the forest to hear the pretty birds chirping and the sun shining through the leaves of the trees. The branches swayed to the gentle breeze, setting chills down on his spine.

He glanced at her and softly gazed at her. “Sooo, are you going to give me some hint as to where we’re going?”

She turned back with a small smirk at him. “It’s gonna blow your socks off.”

“That’s not a hint,” he teased with a blush.

“It’s some hint,” she quipped.

He rolled his eyes playfully. “Look, if you think it’s my birthday, you’re way off by two months and twenty days.”

Her smirk widened. “I’ll be sure to note that. But it’s not for your birthday.”

He dropped his playful look. “Then…what are you taking me out for?”

“Well, there’s something I oughta show you and I thought you would like it—”

Both Chalice and Canteen stopped when they noticed a temple ahead of them. For some reason, the white stoned temple seemed familiar to her.

Canteen gasped in recognition of the temple. “Whoa.”

“Whoa what?”

The silver canteen headed off towards the temple, taking the lead now with fascination in his eyes.

“Canteen, wait!” Chalice chased after Canteen towards the temple.

The kids reached to the bottom of the steps, looking up at the two front statues.

Chalice softened her gaze at one of the statues of a cup woman with long wavy hair resting on her shoulder and her name engraved under her feet of her name.

“Esther Cupchal.”

Chalice frowned at the name and then looked at the other statue, a man with a cup for his head that was chipped on the side. His name was engraved under his feet as well, but it was barely readable.

“Chester Cupchal.”

Canteen focused on the entrance of the temple with an awed look. “Is this what you’re trying to show me?”

Chalice faked a smile. “Yeah, definitely. Definitely! Since ya like myths and stuff, you might like looking at a mausoleum.”

He turned to look at her and saw her fake smile. “Are you sure this is the place you want to show me?”

She waved off her emotions and took him by the hand. “Yeah. C’mon. There’s so much to look at.”

They head into the mausoleum. Once they were inside, Chalice found herself more familiar with her surroundings. She looked at more statues of familiar friends, remembering their dead bodies in the glitch of her memories. She moved her eyes away from the statues and focused forward, leaving Canteen in confusion.

Canteen noticed one of the statues that was a spoon with the name under her feet:

Silversmith Spoon.

The canteen realized that Chalice was trying to keep her gaze away from the statues. He frowned at the sight of her and hurried beside her, faking a grin.

“Hey, if you want, we can find somewhere else to explore. I’m sure there are plenty of things in the forest we can explore other than this mausoleum,” Canteen said.

She faked a smile. “Aww, I thought you liked myths and legends.”

“I do,” he replied with a blush. “But I’m sure there are more adventures out there than this old mausoleum.” As he was saying the last part, he stepped on the floor plate that sunk below his foot.

He widened his eyes in shock and looked down to see that he pressed the floor plate.

The ground began to open under their feet as they wrapped their arms around each other and fell into the dark abyss with screams. 

~.~

Cassidy was guiding Natalie through the village, looking for this supposed “fashion expert” to help her find her friend a perfect dress for the date.

Natalie was surprised to see this side of Cassidy, the one who was all giddy and excited for her best friend’s date. Not that Cassidy had never been happy for Natalie before, but Natalie could see a gleam in her eyes that were filled with pure genuine joy. She knew Cassidy didn’t like clothes shopping as much as Natalie, but it didn’t feel like Cassidy was sacrificing her own happiness for Natalie’s sake. Or forcing herself to dangerous situations to please her best friend. Maybe because this time…Natalie didn’t ask her too. And maybe this time…Cassidy wanted to do this.

However, Natalie felt a slight disappointment when she was taken to Porkrind’s shop. She blinked in confusion and glanced at her best friend.

“Why are we—?”

The answer was revealed immediately after Cassidy opened the door. The girls noticed Dice leaning over the counter and talking to Porkrind, who seemed to lean a bit towards the former gambler in interest of what he was saying.

“So, here’s the thing, if we can make your shop just a tad bit fancier,” Dice began while gesturing to the shop without looking at the girls. “You should be getting more customers and more customers means more money.”

“Make it fancy?” Porkrind questioned. He crossed his arm with a brow raised. “How fancy are we talking?”

“Well…” Dice looked around the shop until he noticed the girls. “Oh, hey, girls.” He glanced at the pig to whisper, “You got your first customers.”

“Actually, Dice, we’re looking for you,” Cassidy clarified.

“Me?” King Dice glanced at Porkrind, who shrugged his shoulders. Dice shifted his attention back at the girls. “Why me?”

“We need your fashion expertise,” Cassidy replied excitedly.

A smug smile formed on the die’s lips. “Well, well, you came to the right place. So, who do we need to dress up?”

Cassidy glanced at Natalie, who waved at Dice nervously.

“Hi,” Natalie uttered.

“Hello,” Dice responded.

“She needs a perfect dress for her date with Cuphead,” Cassidy said with a bright smile.

Natalie’s entire face turned red and she smiled nervously.

“Oh,” Dice responded with a small chuckle. “I didn’t think that cup is gonna get a girl because of his lack of…well, intelligence. But I see he’s got you fallin’ for him.”

“Hey, Cuphead is not stupid,” Natalie argued with Dice in a defensive manner.

Dice blinked in shock.

Porkrind put his hand on his hip and looked at Dice with a teasing smirk at him. “Better not talk bad about her man.”

Dice giggled and glanced at the one-eyed pig. “He ain’t a man just yet.” He shifted his attention to Natalie while rubbing the bottom edge of his square face. “Buuuut…I can get you pretty up before the date. You know, if we put some light make-up and a pretty pink dress on ya, you would look fabulous. It’ll even knock Cuphead’s socks off.”

Natalie suddenly became uncomfortable when Dice offered his hand to guide her. Cassidy noticed the discomfort in her friend’s face along with Dice and Porkrind.

“You okay, Nat?” Cassidy asked with a brow raised.

Dice blinked in realization and frowned for a moment. He shook off his frown and gave Natalie a comforting smile. “Would it better if you have a lady help getting you ready for your date?”

Natalie glanced at Cassidy for a moment and then back at King Dice with a small nod.

“What—?” Cassidy seemed confused until Dice pulled her aside and whispered to her about what happened to Natalie before they went to rescue the feline from Hell. The red cat gasped in shock and glanced at her friend with a soft look.

Natalie looked away in shame and embarrassment.

Dice turned to Porkrind. “Hey, Porks, you got a phone? I gotta make a call real quick.”

Porkrind darted his gaze at Natalie and then back at Dice. He pointed at the phone hooked on the wall next to him. “Knock yourself out.”

Dice nodded and headed to the phone. He dialed the number and leaned against the wall, holding the speaker.

“Hello, is this Sally?” Dice called. An answer came, causing him to smile. “This is Dice. Uh, say, someone needs your help in dressing her up and getting her ready for her date. Do you mind helping her out?”

Dice smiled when he got a response he wanted to hear. “Great. We’re right inside of Pork’s shop. See you soon.”

He hung up the phone and glanced at the ladies. “So, I got someone on her way to help ya out.”

“Thanks, Dice,” Natalie said with a weak smile.

Not even a minute later, Sally entered the shop with a bright smile and dresses on her arms.

“I heard someone is trying to get ready for a date,” Sally replied excitedly.

Natalie rose her hand slowly. “I am.”

“Ooh, I got a bunch of pretty dresses that are not costumes. Wanna try them on?” Sally asked while showing many dresses on her arms.

Natalie nodded her head. “Sure.”

“I can come with you if it’s okay with Dad,” Cassidy said while looking at her father.

Porkrind smiled. “Yeah, yeah. Just stay safe out there and have fun.”

The feline grinned and stayed by Natalie while they walked away to go with Sally to try on dresses.

Once the girls left, Porkrind huffed a sigh and looked at his desk.

Dice noticed Porkrind’s sigh. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah. I’m fine,” Porkrind said.

“You sure?”

The one-eyed pig glanced at Dice to notice the former gambler leaning forward a bit in interest.

“It’s nothing. It’s just that…she keeps reminding me too much of an old friend I had once.”

“Shayna, right?”

Porkrind glanced at Dice in shock.

“Uh, Jerry told me about you lost her. I’m sorry for your loss.”

The pig waved it off. “It was years ago.”

Dice frowned to notice him looking away. “But it still hurts you to this day, right?”

“Sometimes.”

Dice tilted his head. “Is she Shayna’s daughter?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh…well, that puts things into perspective than.”

“What?”

“Well, most people hate red cats back then. But you didn’t because your friend was one of them. I guess it’s why you cared so much about Cassidy since she’s your friend’s daughter.”

Porkrind huffed a laugh. “You’re a detective now?”

“You can say that I’m connecting the dots here. Am I getting any of it right so far?”

The pig looked away sadly again. “Yeah, you’re getting it right.”

There was a brief silence while Dice frowned and looked away.

Porkrind noticed Dice shifting his glance away and cleared his throat to get his attention back. “You know, I’m wondering what the boys are even doing to get Cuphead ready for his date.”

Dice huffed up a laugh. “Yeah, I wonder that too.”

~.~

Mugman searched through the closet of their new home, finding a bunch of clothes he didn’t know they even had. Suits, shirts, shorts, and pants. Heck, even coats with two pairs of winter boots for the snow.

Cuphead sat at the edge of the bed while staring at his brother looking through the closet.

“Man, to think Djimmi would add clothes on top of giving us a house to live in. Oh! There’s that red suit I was lookin’ for!” He turned to show the red suit to Cuphead. “What do you think, Cuphead—?”

Mugman noticed Cuphead looking at the ground without lifting his eyes up to see the suit. He tilted his head in confusion. “Hey, aren’t you excited about your date?”

“Huh?” Cuphead snapped out of his thoughts and looked at his brother. He faked a smile. “Uh, yeah, I am.”

Mugman wasn’t convinced. “Cuphead, the date is gonna be fine as long as the Devil, the demons, and the infectees won’t find us here. Which they won’t tonight. Or any other night hopefully—”

“I ain’t worried about the date.”

“Then…you’re worried about something.”

Cuphead rubbed his hands without saying a word.

Mugman set the suit aside and sat by his brother. “Hey, if there’s somethin’ bothering ya, you know you can talk to me about it, right?”

Cuphead nodded his head, but there was no response still.

Mugman looked ahead with a sad look. “Did I…do anything that made you feel like you can’t talk to me?”

His brother shook his head. “Nah, you did nothing wrong—”

“Are you sure?”

“Mugman, it ain’t got anything to do with you. I just—” Cuphead couldn’t finish the sentence without hugging himself.

“You just what?”

“I just thought about how I was trying to help you set up for your date with Cassi. Now you’re trying to help me set up for my date with Nat. It’s kind of nice, you know? Like how you were trying to keep me from losing my soul to the Devil. And now, sometimes I feel like I’m trying to keep you from getting hurt.”

Mugman frowned while listening to his brother.

“I’m sorry I hadn’t been the best brudda to you in a past,” Cuphead said.

Mugman chuckled a bit. “I hadn’t been the best brother to you either.” He placed a hand on Cuphead’s shoulder, getting his brother’s attention. “It’s okay, Cuphead. You don’t have to feel guilty about it anymore.”

“I know…I just…can’t help but think about what it could’ve been if I ain’t so stupid.”

“Well, what you did a lot of stupid things,” Mugman corrected his brother. “Going to that carnival where the Devil tries to steal souls, getting answers wrong on Roll the Dice, stealing cookies from the cookie factory, getting ourselves arrested being in that said cookie factory, almost getting yourself injured at every turn, blowing up wood for the winter, stealing the Devil’s pitchfork—”

“Are you trying to make me feel better? Because it ain’t workin’ so far.”

Mugman sighed. “But besides all of that, Cuphead, I couldn’t have asked for a better brother who is also my best friend. You annoy me and irritate me, but you also taught me a lot of things….good things! Like being brave and making decisions that were opposite of yours when situations arise.”

“Okay…”

“You also were there for me when I’m hurt, sad, lonely, and when I needed you the most. You get me into a lot of trouble and it was all fun while it lasted. What it could’ve been doesn’t matter now. We got each other and right now, I’m gonna help you get ready for that date of yours. Just like how you helped me.”

Cuphead smiled softly. “Thanks, Mugsy.”

Mugman nodded and skipped off the subject. “Say, you want to wear the red suit or…any other suit?”

“I’ll stick with the red one since it suits me more.”

“Perfect.”

Cuphead pondered for a moment. “I wonder how Chalice was doing confessing to Canteen.”

“Oh yeah. I’m sure they’re fine.”

~.~

Canteen and Chalice were laying on the ground with groans of pain from the fall.

Chalice sprung herself up on her feet and dusted herself off. “Well, that was quite a fall—” She noticed Canteen barely standing up with wobbly legs. “Golly, Canteen, you okay?!”

“Yep…” Canteen answered with a thumbs up. “Are we still at the mausoleum?”

Chalice looked up at the hole they fell from. “Looks like we’re under it now.”

“Geez…”

“Hey, we got ourselves trapped in the cave.”

“Uh…yeah?”

“Ooh, okay. Um…how should I—how should we—?”

“We just look for the way out,” Canteen said with an obvious tone. He pointed straight ahead. “There might be something ahead. Let’s go.” He limped forward, causing concern for her.

She clenched her teeth. “Man, I didn’t think about the injuries for this trip.”

Both of them walked through the cave, shivering in the soft breeze. Canteen’s limping started to bother Chalice to the point where she contorted her face in guilt.

“Man, this is not how I would imagine this.”

“Imagine what?” Canteen asked with confusion.

“Well, you see…um, I was thinkin’ that we go on a perilous journey—without gettin’ injured…and, you know…say our deepest feelings.”

“Deepest feelings?” Canteen questioned.

“Yeah. What’s your deepest feeling right now?”

He rubbed the back of his head. “Well, I’m the one that got us trapped here. I didn’t think there was a pressure plate.”

“Yeah, I didn’t see that either. Don’t feel bad. It happens.”

He frowned.

She noticed it with a curious look. “What’s wrong?”

He shook his head. “It’s nothing.”

“Canteen…”

He went silent for a moment until he glanced at Chalice. “Have you ever felt like…?”

She leaned a bit to listen what else he had to say.

“You know…have you ever felt like you’re a bad omen?”

Chalice blinked at the question. “A bad omen…?”

“Yeah.”

She pondered for a second. “Well, before I met the two ding-dongs, I did feel like a bad omen. But when I did meet them, I didn’t feel so…alone. I felt like I gained something that I’ve lost a long time ago. It’s…hard to explain.”

He reached his hand out for hers to comfort her until she noticed. He pulled away, blushing in embarrassment. She gave him a warm smile and held his hand. He was shocked at the gesture for a moment until he exchanged a warm smile back to her and held her hand a bit tighter.

“Soo, do you feel like a bad omen?” she asked softly.

He lost his smile. “Well…yeah. I get called ‘Bad Luck Hughes’ growing up.”

“Oh golly! Why?”

“Heh, it’s complicated.”

“I’m all for complicated, you know.”

He paused for a moment and then sighed. “Whenever I get adopted…my parents just died…”

Chalice blinked in shock.

“Like…one of the parents who adopted me got into a car accident. The other parents got themselves killed in a fight…Heck, the third time I got adopted, my parents just got jumped by a gang and died. That’s when the rumor started to spread by the caretakers in the orphanage. They would tell the parents who would think about adopting me that I was ‘Bad Luck Hughes’ and to not adopt me if they don’t want bad luck in their houses. Then the kids became afraid of me…like I was going to hurt them…and I would never hurt anyone…ever…” He started to choke out the words at the end.

She widened her eyes in shock to hear this from him. Then she watched him trying not to sob in front of her with a frown.

“I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone ever…not even you.”

She smiled softly and held his hand tighter while listening to him break down and cry.

“Now I got us trapped in this cave and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I haven’t brought the best of luck with the group…it’s almost like every bad thing happened and I’m scared that if I lose you…I-I don’t know what would happen. I just…I guess I don’t want anything bad to take you from me.”

She blushed at his words.

He shook his head while wiping his tears away. “Sorry…that was pretty stupid thing to say.”

“It ain’t stupid. Out of all of the things I’ve heard in my past lives, you ain’t saying anything stupid.”

He glanced at her and sniffled. “Sorry.”

“You don’t have anything to apologize for,” she said while leaning her head against his.

He smiled softly and let her lay her head on his. They continued to walk through the cave and saw a door ahead.

“Is that the way out?” Canteen asked timidly.

Chalice opened the door. They both widened their eyes to discover there were three orbs resting on both sides of the wide hallway. One was glowing pink, one was glowing bright green, and one was glowing dark blue.

By the end of the hallway, there was a glowing pool. She stepped forward towards the pool, followed by Canteen.

“Chalice?” Canteen called, but she didn’t respond.

Her eyes started to tremble as she continued towards the pool. She looked down to find that there was no bottom of the glowing pool. She didn’t want to jump into it, but she remembered something about it…something familiar.

“I—I remember this place…”

He looked at her in shock. “What?”

She tilted her head and got on her knees, trying to find the source of the glow in the pool. “I remember this pool.”

He arched a brow in confusion. “What are you remembering?”

She glanced at him. He could see the tears in her eyes.

“I don’t know…” she said sadly.

He frowned and looked at the orbs. He was curious about the dark blue orb, but he didn’t draw near it when he turned to look at her. He came by her and sat next to her to stare at the glowing pool.

“Canteen…there’s something I oughta tell ya…and I need you to not tell the others about it,” she said finally. “Not until I can be brave enough to tell them.”

He looked at her and nodded. “I won’t, I promise.”

She smiled at him softly. “You read the legends of the Legendary Chalice, right?”

He nodded his head.

She continued, “Well, what those legends didn’t tell ya was a long time ago, the Calix Animi were supposed to serve the Most High and protect mortals from dealing with demons, but the gifts from the Most High became their own gifts when the members of the Calix Animi became prideful. The members say that only people who are chosen by the Most High and worthy will obtain the last two gifts. Then a ding-dong thief managed to mix the last two gifts together and became one of them.”

Canteen tilted his head. “ The two gifts mixed together? Wait! Are you talking about the Eternal’s Orb?”

She smiled. “Yep. That’s how the Eternal’s Orb was born. Anyway, the other members didn’t react too kindly when they saw a thief having the Eternal’s Orb inside of him. Of course, that caused a lot of division between them. The Devil sees this and well…took advantage of it. There was a battle and…let’s say that the Legendary Chalice lost everything. She’s the only one who survived the battle.”

He frowned when listening to the story. “She must have felt alone.”

“And a bad omen too.”

He perked his head up.

She sighed sadly. “She decided to do something that she regretted and caused her to reincarnate so many times. She threw her spear down into that pool, gather the powers of her dead friends, and hid them away in this place…except for one.”

“The Eternal’s Orb?”

“Yeah, she placed it over at the other mausoleum at someplace different that eventually became Sugarland,” Chalice replied. “Don’t ask me why…I still didn’t get why I decided to place Eternal’s Orb to this day. Probably scared that the demons might find it…? Not sure.”

He frowned. “And now you’re here.”

“Yep…”

He held her hand, catching her attention. “I won’t say anything to anyone. I promise.”

“I know. I trust you, Hughes,” she said with a soft smile while she grabbed his face and kissed his lips. He widened his eyes before melting into the kiss. He grabbed her face to keep the kiss going until they broke away to look into each other’s eyes. Their eyes suddenly broadened cartoonishly as Canteen let go of her face.

“Whoa,” he uttered.

She felt sudden chills coming down her spine. “Wow…heh, I’ve never felt this before.”

“Me neither…” he said while blushing madly.

She got excited and kissed his lips again, almost knocking him down. He gasped in shock once her lips crashed into his again, but his shock melted away as he caressed her face.

They both broke away, causing Chalice to bounce away like a little kid.

“Whoa, wow! Wow,” she responded, trying to keep herself together.

He giggled giddily. “Yeah…” He realized that they were still in the hallway. “Uh, should we get out of here? Maybe later we can…you know, find someplace to hang out and…”

“Date?” she finished with a smile.

“Yeah.”

She came up to him and helped him up on his feet with a lovesick grin. “I would love that.”

They both turned to look and found a door to the side. They went to the door and opened it to find that there was a way out from under the ground. As they went up the stairs, they were holding hands and walking as close to each other as they could.

~.~

The night was young.

Cuphead had been standing outside of the theater with his red suit after the brothers were told by Cassidy through the phone that they were getting ready at Sally’s theater.

The cup became impatient, which was noticed by his brother.

“She’ll come out. Don’t worry,” Mugman reassured his brother.

Cuphead looked away ashamed. “I know. I’m just…well…you know how it feels, huh?”

“Anxious, impatient, nervous, and excited all mix together?”

“Yeah.”

Mugman smiled softly. “Welcome to dating.”

They heard heels clicked and turned their heads to notice their girlfriends coming out.

Cassidy let Natalie walk towards Cuphead.

Cuphead’s pupils dilated when he saw her wearing her dark pink dress with a skirt that appeared to be fluffy and with feathers dragging on the floor. She had only light make-up with light pink eyeshadows and light blushes on her cheeks. She had her brown liquid hair up in a bun, pinned by the dark pink feathers. She had long light pink gloves on that went up to her elbows and heels.

She seemed nervous. “Heh, I don’t know if I picked the right dress for the date—”

“Pretty,” Cuphead blurted out.

She stopped her sentence and blushed. Then she gave a smile. “You think so?”

He nodded his head. “Yeah.” Then he noticed Natalie wearing the pink pearl necklace that Cuphead gave to her when Mugman was first dating Cassidy. “Hey, you’re wearing the necklace I gave ya a long time ago.”

“Yeah…you don’t mind, right?”

He shook his head. “I bought it for you. I don’t mind at all whether you wear it or not.”

She grinned at him. “Ready?”

He nodded and held his arm out. “Ready.”

She wrapped her arm around his and stayed close to him.

Mugman watched them with a proud smirk at his brother. He felt someone lean against him and looked to see Cassidy rubbing her head against his with purrs. He wrapped his arm around her waist while her tail embraced around his waist.

“Are we going to spy on them like they did to us?” she whispered against the side of his head.

He giggled. “Maybe. Maybe not. I ain’t too worried about them.”

She sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. “You know, since everything is getting calmer, do you think we can try another date?”

He looked at her. “Like going out to eat kind of date?”

She nodded her head with a ‘Mhm’.

He gave a small chuckle. “I would love that.”

Chalice and Canteen approached them with bruises and scratches, which were noticed by Mugman and Cassidy.

“By golly, what happened to you both?” Mugman questioned Chalice and Canteen.

Both Chalice and Canteen exchanged glances at each other and snickered a bit.

“Well, let’s just say that we went on a perilous journey,” she said with a shrug.

Mugman looked to see Chalice holding Canteen’s hand. “Oh. Well, congratulations.”

“Thanks,” Canteen answered bashfully.

Chalice looked to see Cuphead and Natalie going to Fly Trap and sitting at the dock of the ferry ship. “Did I miss anything with Cuphead and Natalie?”

“Other than them getting ready for a date, not that much,” Mugman answered.

They watched as the cups were going on date. By the end of the date, Cuphead and Natalie danced with each other to the music played by Ribby and Croaks.

As Mugman watched on, he felt something strange in his body. His vision became a blur for a moment. He almost stumbled, but he felt Cassidy holding him up. He glanced at her to notice her concern look with a clearer vision.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said.

His friends and his girlfriend didn’t believe him, but they didn’t push further.

As they watched, Mugman couldn’t help but felt like something was calling him. It was calling his name. He tried to ignore it, but it was getting harder and harder to ignore. A vision of a pool came and went for a second. He became light-headed from trying to ignore this weird vision. He felt like he was going to throw up, but he couldn’t. His legs were shaking and he was breathing shallow breaths. He could barely hear Cassidy’s concern tone, but it was muffled. He could assume that she was asking if he was okay. He gave a slight nod to her as his vision became a blur. Then the blur became black. He lost his balance and collapsed onto the ground.

He could no longer hear the voices asking him if he was alright. It was just him and the darkness. 

To Be Continued...

[kmomof4]

small!

Thanks for playing, Kazzy!!!! I'm sorry it took me so long to answer... I kept forgetting! Now, thanks to your sprint game a couple of weeks ago, I have SIX WIPs!!!!! I've NEVER had that many at one time... I don't think... anyway, let's see how many you hit!

A Scoundrel... Or a Gentleman- CS fic coming soon, tentative drop date in early May, inspired by Francesca Bridgerton's story.

She wanted Killian to kiss her. She wanted Killian.

The knowledge was like a lightning bolt, electrifying her nerve endings and leaving her trembling in anticipation. She wasn’t supposed to want anyone. But Killian…

She waited for him to move. She could do nothing but moisten her lips and wait for him to move. Because she knew when he did, it would be perfection. 

And it was. 

He claimed her lips with his own and she melted into him. His hand found its way to the small of her back and while he didn’t pull her into him, the barest pressure was there and the distance between them slowly disappeared until she could feel the scrape of his evening clothes through the silk of her dressing gown.

The Arena- Werewolf fic for the @cssns dropping on July 3.

It was nearly a week later that he’d woken, according to his mother. She hadn’t been far behind him as he ran through the market and had seen what the shopkeeper had done. She was too late to do anything about her son’s hand, but she’d made sure the shopkeeper would never be capable of such cruelty again. A small dagger coated with aconite from the Monkshood plant leaving a scratch across his wrist was all it took to sentence the man to death before the sun set that same day.

Return to Me- Dracula inspired fic for the @cssns dropping on August 22.

“I am Killian Jones,” he said. His voice was low and rich and it wrapped around her like a warm blanket on a cold winter's night. “I am Lord of these lands, and you are my love. I’ve waited for you for 250 years.”

“What?!” she cried. His last words made her mind race back to Dr. Cassidy’s words earlier as she quickly put the pieces together. “Are you the vampire?” She couldn’t contain the horror in her voice or, she was sure, on her face. “The one Dr. Cassidy is here to kill? Oh, God! Are you here to kill me?” She pulled her legs toward her chest and scooted as close to the head of the bed as she could, trying to present as small a target as was possible.

“Never, my swan,” he assured her, gentle compassion beset on his features, his hand still outstretched, her superpower as silent as could be. “You are my bride. Returned to me. As promised.”

The Risk of Remembering- H/C fic that is at the bottom of the priority list, no matter what @snowbellewells and @jrob64 say... This is actually from the notes portion of the doc, but since the doc does have words, not just notes on it, I'll share them anyway.

Whale graduated med school, but decided to go back to school to be a vet instead. He cut Killian’s clothes off and Emma found a pair of sweatpants for him to wear but they’re a tad too small… Whale stitched him up- 10 stitches at his hairline, 3 on his cheek. He’s been unconscious for almost 24hrs.

The Rescue- fic inspired by the recent daring rescue of a female tractor trailer driver over the Ohio River when involved in an accident.

Nothing... sorry...

Killian (Indiana) Jones- a fic inspired by... three guesses and the first two don't count... Raiders of the Lost Ark.

The jungle dripped with humidity as the tall man who was undoubtedly the leader pushed through the next tangle of vines and branches on the way to a cave that held the object of his desire. 

Two men followed him- one plainly nervous, betrayed by the way his gaze darted around the jungle and the small flinches whenever the cries of animals concealed within the greenery reached them. The other was a native, and when the first man stopped for a moment, mopping his sweat covered brow, he approached with a chuckle. 

“Not used to the heat and humidity of Columbia, eh, Dr. Jones? Aren’t you glad you brought me along…” The smug smirk on his face made Dr. Killian Jones roll his eyes in response.

“I’m fine,” he deadpanned, “I can assure you. I’ve been in jungles far worse than this. You just stay close.”

Thanks again for playing!!

[syngrafaes09]

Strange Nights | Vampire! Dr Strange x Y/n

Logline: After Y/N gets imprinted by a vampire Dr Strange, living under a fictive identity, they must unravel the cause behind her constant misadventures before their hopes are crushed forever.

Masterlist

Chapter 12 : Revelations

Stephen felt more than concerned for Y/N. Three attacks within a month. Though she was an imposition he wished to avoid, honestly pleased by his agrestic alpha status, he couldn't help but be protective of her no matter what. But her lack of zeal to live and unlikely luck of attracting disasters was further adding fuel to his burning incumbrances. I want her, he realised and was more than willing than any of his kind to smoothly explain to her about the world she had unexpectedly made herself a part of only if... she had not enraged him by her vague will to live and being maddened at the fact that her life mattered to someone or he had tried saving her.

He watched helplessly as she slammed the door and walked away straight. She was hurt. And it was all because of me. The anger got the better of him. Maybe it was because he was tired. The Council meeting was nowhere near to being fruitful and he had this uneasy feeling in his chest since morning - And Tony would be alone to face the Council the next day. He had come back immediately when Wanda called having seen Y/N go out without Rachael or Mathew. Rachael's werewolf connections and Matt's combat skills had given him some hope she would be safe with them when she was out of her house. As for being alone, her house was a safe haven with all those protective spells. Even though she was safe now, he thought of following her till she reached home. He couldn't relax about her.

"Shall we leave?" she asked them, her tone worried. He wished he could use the time stone, go a few minutes back and make everything right.

Stephen felt the cloak's gentle tap on his shoulder and looked back. It pointed towards the trench coat. It struck him a second late that Y/N didn't have her jacket. I didn't have to go back in time to make things right. Just walk to her and ask politely if the girls minded if I joined them for dinner. He grabbed the coat and tried to walk casually towards them.

Stephen was inches away from her when he felt the strange smell of grass and lemons fill his senses. It was similar to the one he had detected near her house the morning after the chupacabra attack. And a few days ago - near the accident site.

The uneasiness puffed once again inside him. The scent came from one of her friends, whom he had never seen before, not only with Y/N but anywhere near Rockport. And she stopped immediately, surprised after she caught sight of him. The rest of Y/N's friends were looking at him surprised too. So it made him somewhat unsure of the other girl. Anyways, he wasn't going to take any chances against Y/N. He smoothened the coat over her shoulders, a bit awkward, as she stared at him incredulously.

"Sorry – we ate while waiting," Emily said in a guilt-laden voice. A near memory of them eating together, unconcerned about Y/N who had been late on meeting them, flashed in her mind.

Lily cursed and was wishing Stephen had called them a bit earlier. I would have a dinner date with the doctor. Cassidy will be so jealous about it when I would have told her about it on Monday.

As for the other girl, she was bored. She was worried about refurbishing her new cottage. Nothing seemed abnormal about her yet...

"It's fine, let's go," Y/N said, looking down.

"I think you should eat," he interrupted unceremoniously. Emily and Lily seemed worried about getting home late while the other girl was suspicious Y/N had called him over to their night out. "Do you mind if I drive Y/N home?" For the kind of information he wished to share with Y/N, it couldn't be done with her friends around. He looked deep into the eyes of the girls trying to intimidate them; a powerful stare of persuasion - a feat every alpha vampire exploited.

Does Y/N want to stay with him? Who wouldn't want to be alone with Dr Rochester? Lily thought, staring at Y/N for confirmation.

Will she be okay with him? What would Chief Henley say to this? She is going to be late home, even if she comes with us. Emily was genuinely worried about her.

"Matt's fine with it," Stephen lied before Y/N could speak anything.

Matt would definitely not agree to this. Y/N thought glaring at him.

Matt knew him well. He didn't doubt if he called him, the man would disagree. But after his behaviour earlier, he wasn't expecting much of her to take on his offer.

"I'll call you guys after I reach home," she declared to her friends. The odd way he and Anna looked at each other had her considerably discomfited. Besides she needed answers. Cannibalism, sorcery and everything else - as dangerous as they sounded she felt Stephen radiated - though not warmth - but safety. "You better explain yourself, doctor," she whispered to him once her friends were at a safe distance from them.

Stephen smirked and looked at the grill. It wasn't much of a crowd. And with her having witnessed his murderous rage, he felt she would hardly feel safe when he would reveal his true identity. Somewhere crowded yet private. "Mind if we go somewhere else?" She glanced at him suspiciously before agreeing.

Y/N was surprised when Stephen called Matt and he agreed with her returning late.

But she looked quite uncomfortable as he held the restaurant door open for her. "Something's wrong?" he asked, looking at the sea of people that flooded the Asian restaurant.

"Too many people, there's-"

"Good evening, Welcome to Umigawa Canting. Please follow me." The hostess interrupted her. Y/N sighed and followed her. She led them to the near middle of the crowd towards a two-seated table. Stephen shook his head. Handing over her a bill, he requested the booths that looked over the shore.

Peeking at the bill, she led them to the far end of the walkway toward the less noisy booths. "How's this?" She perked up. "Perfect," Y/N unexpectedly announced before smiling widely at her. "Your server will be there shortly," she said resentfully before merging with the crowd. He tried to strife a chuckle at the scornful Y/N.

"What's wrong darling?" he playfully asked, sliding inside the booth. "You have brought us out here where I can barely escape you."

"So you want to escape me?" he asked, feeling a bit indignant, but surely it was his fault. When she didn't answer, he tried rephrasing his question. "Why didn't you protest when I lied about Matt? You know, you could have gone with your friends?"

"You seemed pretty adamant about letting me go," she answered immediately. He guessed that was right but it still didn't quench his curiosity over the fact that she was here with him when she wanted to escape from him. "Besides," she continued, "I wanted to know what changed your mind. You wanted to just drop me off and leave." He smiled at her apologetically. She sighed and looked away. "Dr Rochester-"

"Stephen," he insisted.

"You... are an s-sorcerer?" he nodded, getting a hint of why she had stayed. "Then you knew the other man- sorcerer?" He shook my head. "I was too busy fighting even to read his mind."

"You can read minds?" she asked, amused. "Yeah, I'm a sorcerer; I can do a few things that normal humans can't do."

"So you can read my mind too?"

"I'm not always reading people's minds, Y/N. It's their personal space and I respect privacy. I don't do it unless it's required to." She still looked at him disbelievingly. "You can trust me. I'm not reading you."

She sighed once again. "Why did you bring us here? I can't rush through this crowd in case your homicidal rage returns."

"Angry or not, I would never hurt you." She wasn't much surprised at his confession. "Always says the one who hurts the most," she whispered lowly under her breath. Stephen sighed at her. "I won't," he insisted. This time Y/N was taken aback. She had not expected him to hear her. "I brought us here so that by seeing the people around, you would feel safe."

"Then why not sit in the middle of the crowd than corner me in some booth?"

"As close as I can see, I'm the one who is actually cornered," he replied honestly. She gave out another frustrated sigh. And that was it. Then she had no intention of even looking in his direction let one talk any further. When the waitress came to take their orders, she remained stubbornly silent. Giving in, he ordered veg yakisoba for both of them. He had no idea of her preferences, and since he asked her to trust him over not reading her mind, he didn't want to take away any trust she had in him. He just hoped she would eat some of it or ask for anything else.

The silence stretched till their food was delivered. Even after contemplating different ways, he was still clueless about how to bring up the vampire truth without scaring her.

"Dr Rochester-"

"Stephen," he corrected.

"Stephen," she took a bite before continuing, "I am sorry." He thought she was going to say that she didn't like it or something but she didn't. "Apology accepted," he chimed in as they continued eating.

"Well?" he hummed.

"When you said that there was no point in hiding it, what did you mean?" Stephen let out a breath of relief. Finally. "Will you freak out and try to run away, if I told the truth?" She shook her head firmly. "What do you know about mythical creatures?"

She furrowed her brows into a deep V. "Mythical as if mermaids, fairies... werewolves and vampires?" He gave a slight nod. "Nothing much other than the information available in books and over the internet."

He hadn't realised she was waiting for him to speak up. This was much more complicated than he had thought. "Well... I'm a vampire besides a sorcerer," he blurted out.

"Oh."

"Y-you don't have anything else to say?"

She shook her head but then spoke, "You are lying, right?"

Stephen denied.

"Well, if you are a vampire then you can't be a doctor in the first place..."

His laughter cut her off. "I'm- sorry," Stephen said in between his laughs. "I wasn't expecting this reaction from you." She frowned and continued to eat. "I won't deny that it was difficult in the beginning but with practice, I hardly notice any difficulty now."

"I have questions," she said, abruptly enthusiastic.

"Okay but you eat while we talk," he said pointing towards her cooling food. "Okay," she agreed, chewing in a bite.

"You have a Cloak that follows you around and your orders?"

"Yeah, that was the Cloak of Levitation. It has a mind of its own."

"You can heal quickly?"

"Yes."

"Sleep in coffins?"

"No. Literal myth."

"Burned by the sun?"

"Not exactly but kind of." She waited for further elaboration. "I have this theory that our subspecies suffer from a disease known as Porphyria. In the case of chronic porphyrias, there are four types. One is X-linked dominant, in that case, after some time of exposure to UV rays there is severe pain, burning, and discomfort in exposed areas and on continued exposure those result in swelling and redness similar to a sunburn. Next question."

"How can you eat this?" She asked, pointing at his plate. "Aren't you supposed to just drink... blood?" She shuddered at the end.

"Blood alone can't cover our nutrient requirement." She nodded and continued towards finishing her plate. He was worried that she was scared. "I don't feed –"

"I know." She interrupted. "I have read about vampires that survive on animal blood."

They didn't talk much after that until they got back to the car.

"Stephen?" She finally spoke soon after they hit the highways. "Yes," he encouraged her to continue. "Why are you so...? I don't know but... why are you trying to protect me?"

"Do you know about different types of personalities – alpha, beta, gamma, delta, sigma, and omega?"

"Yeah," she choked out. For the second time in the evening, she looked worried. "Okay so... similarly like humans we vampires, werewolves, and other subspecies have certain traits that divide us into different categories. In the case of vampires, especially male ones, we have two categories – alphas and non-alphas. When it comes to finding partners, alpha vampires have a characteristic feature of imprinting-"

"I thought only werewolves imprinted."

"Not all werewolves, just alpha werewolves, and unlike us, an alpha in case of werewolves can be a male or a female, though females are rare. But that isn't your concern. So through imprinting, we find our mates. And by mates, it isn't normal like the mates of other vampires. They are more like our soul mates. And just like any other living creature; we are very protective of someone that means so much to us. We can't see them hurt like any other member of the coven. But though we are responsible for other members towards our mate... it's painful to see them getting hurt. If they," he paused, not being able to think about it. He knew at one point in time this imprinting thing would happen but he had always been so busy he had never given thought to any of this.

"If they what, Stephen?"

He took a deep breath before saying anything. "If they die, it mostly kills us." She bit her lips and tore her gaze away from him. A screaming silence chilled the space between them.

"So you imprinted on me" It wasn't a question though he answered, "Yes."

"So your family... it's your coven?" She asked after some time. "No, it's Tony's coven. I'm just an on-and-off member of it."

"I thought you were the alpha, it's supposed to be yours."

"He's alpha too, and so is Donald. Covens and packs don't work the way you have read in books. There may be more than one alpha in them. But only one of them is the head. The leader alpha position of a pack or coven is different from who they actually are. For example, look at your sister's boyfriend's family-"

"Jade's family are vampires too-"

"No. They are werewolves. Both Natasha and Bucky are alphas but it's Natasha who leads the pack. She is the pack's alpha while Bucky is the pack's beta. But in a coven, we have a leader, no second in command. The leader may or may not be an alpha. But in packs, the leader is always an alpha."

"So Rachael knows this about Jade?"

"He is an alpha too. Rachael is his mate. She not only knows about them but also about us too."

"Then why did she lie to me about you? Called you cannibals and all? Asked me to stay away from you and your family?" She was agitated.

"Y/N," Stephen cooed. "Vampires and werewolves have had a conflict from time immemorial. Besides, there are several other things I haven't told you. She had the right reasons to ask you to stay away from me."

"But you won't hurt me, right?" She looked at him with emotions he failed to comprehend. "I won't hurt you or leave you," he promised. "But now," he said, pulling in front of the driveway, "you need to go home."

Startled, she looked outside and then at her watch. It was a quarter past eight. "H-how did we reach so fast? Even Lily took an hour to drive us there. You took like less than thirty minutes."

"I don't like driving slow." Stephen mused, reaching over to unbuckle her seatbelt. She glared at him. Then the front door of her house cracked open. It wasn't the frowning Matt that strained him but the man that stood behind him with a grin on his face.

[heelbucks]

imagine teasing chuck all day and when you finally let him fuck you, he’s so worn out that he cums almost instantly so as punishment you ride him and overstimulate him till you cum

warnings: smut (minors dni),dom!chuck taylor but it quickly turns into sub! chuck taylor, overstimulation, dacryphilia, pet names [peach, darlin’, babyboy], honorifics [ma’am, miss], you are responsible for your own media consumption!!

taglist! { @writtingrose @lydiaisstilessanchor @kamidekawaii @harryedwrd @exe-babymox-exe @thejonasfangirllife @bellalutionn @darlingelite @kennysquads @bloody-kissez @nick-kenny-eddie @buckybarnessmile @shakyskeleton }

also, reminder everything i write is with a plus size reader in mind!!! if you don’t think you can rock a certain outfit, fuck that doubt, do it anyways, just call mama rikki to hype you tf up! and yes, chuck is most definitely strong enough to lift you.

sometimes you felt like being a little mean to your lovely switch of a boyfriend, and today was one of those days. he had a long day of filming segments for bte and the tapings

originally you hadn’t planned on being there, nor did you plan on torturing him. chuck didn’t mean to wake you up at seven am when he woke up, but you felt him move his arms away from you and you whined out. “sorry peach, didn’t mean to wake ya. how’d you sleep?”

you rolled over to face the kentucky boy and reached out to grab him, “stay with me chuckie, ‘m gonna miss you.” he chuckled and kissed your forehead, “come with me then darlin’. it’s gonna be a long day but i don’t wanna be away from you, promise i’ll make it up to you.”

and so, you started to get ready for the day, choosing to be a tease all day long. you roll out of bed, tugging your shirt down and headed to start your morning routine. “why’da have to steel my shirts all the time peach?” chuck smiles as you do your hair in the bathroom sink next to him. it was the moments like these, pure domestic bliss, that almost made you question the hell you were gonna unleash on him today. almost.

as chuck stood behind you working on his hair, you wiggled your bare ass against him, smirking up at him in the mirror. “darlin’, you know i can’t resist that ass, you wanna make us late don’t you?” you stood up straight and said a simple “nope.” and kissed his cheek.

you decided to tease chuck even more, opting for a pair of shorts and an old shirt of his you cut into a crop top. everytime you raised your arms it showed juuust enough of your tummy, and it drove your man wild.

chuck on the other hand was trying his best to keep cool and ignore your attempts at teasing, which would only get worse throughout the day.

before filming their segment for being the elite you were sat in his lap, talking to kris and cassidy planning the skit, slowly wiggling and grinding down on him. if it was dead silent, you’d be able to hear chuck’s tiny whimpers.

wheeler and orange step out to go get food, and kris goes along for the ride. the second that door closes more wheels start turning in your head. you drop down to your knees and give chuck you best innocent look, as if you didn’t spend the last twenty minutes basically dry humping him. “fuck, miss, please, need to be inside you right now.” you palmed him through his jeans, slowly unbuttoning them and even slower you pull them down his legs.

you placed a gentle kiss on his cock through his boxers, and started jerking him off the same way. you did plan to give your boyfriend an amazing blowjob, honestly. but, then the other three returned with food, and you sat back on his lap, hiding the fact that his jeans were undone.

the drive to the arena was spent with you running your hand up and down his thigh, humming lightly. “y/n, you okay love?” he asked, trying not to stumble over his words. “perfectly fine chuckie.” you leaned across the console to kiss his cheek, and squeezed his thigh for good measure.

the entire time you two were backstage was spent being ruthless to him. you’d bend over to fix your shoe in front of him, you’d hug him and make sure you kiss his neck, and the worst was when you’d stand in front of him. he’d be holding you close to his chest out of instinct, and you’d make sure he felt your ass against him. you were convinced you’d make him cum in his tights when you kissed him before his match and said “make me proud babyboy.”

as soon as you two got back to the hotel, chuck had you flung over his shoulder as he carried you to your room. “you think you’re funny teasing me all day, don’t you peach?” he threw you down onto the bed, the mattress bouncing under you. “maybe, what are you gonna do about it, huh chuckie? you know you want me to make you feel good.” and how quickly the man standing above you melted, “i-uh, yes ma’am. please, god please, let me fuck you.”

“good boy, that’s what i thought. i think i teased you enough today hmm? let’s just get to the good part.” you smirked as you tugged off your shorts and panties and tried not to laugh at chuck trying to get his jeans off without falling.

he pulled you down closer to him by your legs and held them open, lining himself up with your entrance. he slowly pushed himself into you, finally being able to feel what he needed all day long. “miss, you feel so good, so tight… ‘m not gonna last….” he whined as he bottomed out inside you. “c’mon chuckie, be a good boy for me, fuck me.” all you heard was skin slapping against skin and chuck’s beautiful moans, for about two minutes. you felt his cock twitch and release inside you before he started to apologize.

“i’m sorry ma’am, i didn’t ask permission… and i didn’t let you finish first. it’s jus’ you’ve been teasing me all damn day and your pus-” you shushed him and moved so he can lay down. “it’s okay babyboy, but, now i’m gonna ride you until i’m done.”

you pinned him under you, one hand stroking his cock and the other running down his chest. “it’s so sensitive already, so responsive to my touch, what do you think is gonna happen if i just…” your voice trailed off as you lined yourself up and slowly sank down onto him.

you couldn’t help but smile at the look of pure bliss on the submissive man’s face. it only got better when you moved your hips. “please, move, fuck you feel so good miss.” he begged from under you.

“don’t worry babyboy, i’m gonna ride you until you cry. or i finish. whatever happens first.”

[nightingaelic]

Craig, Veronica, and Cass learn about Arcade and his father being in the Enclave and constantly running from the BoS and NCR? (IMO, Gannon isnt guilty of anything. He was a child when the Enclave was being hunted down. He actively tries to make the wasteland better!)

The only thing Arcade is guilty of is occasionally annoying Julie Farkas and missing his therapy sessions with Doctor Usanagi, cHaNgE mY mInD

Arcade sighed and tilted his glass of wine around in the afternoon sunlight. "My late father was... an officer in a group called the Enclave, a remnant of America's pre-war government. Memories being short around here, not a whole lot of people remember them, but they did bad things."

"Like what?" the courier asked, accepting the shot of tequila they had ordered from the securitron currently bartending at the Lucky 38 cocktail lounge. They ignored the little tray of salt alongside the drink and downed the liquor straight.

Arcade shrugged. "Terrorized communities, kidnapped people. Eventually, someone stopped them. I was born a few years later at a military base on the coast, a place called Navarro."

The courier slammed their shot glass down on the bar and froze. Arcade tensed too, wondering if his confession had touched a nerve, but was both relieved and terrified when they directed their surprise at someone behind him. "How long have you been standing there?"

Craig Boone: "Long enough."

It was the last voice Arcade wanted to hear, and he slowly spun on his stool to face the former NCR sniper standing by the lounge's entrance. Boone's face was as unreadable as ever beneath his beret and sunglasses, but Arcade could tell his guard was up by his stance: One hand open-palmed, ready to retrieve the rifle on his back, and the other curled into a fist.

Before Arcade could say anything, the courier stood up. Clearly, they sensed some kind of damage had been done. "Easy, Boone. Come over here. Let's talk."

Boone looked like he would rather jump out one of the Lucky 38's windows, but he stiffly approached the bar as requested. "So talk."

The courier's eyes briefly swept the room, searching for the words. "Do you remember what you told me, when I first met you? I walked into Cliff's shop to sell a bunch of Legion armor from that group that tried to get the drop on me outside of town, and you snuck up behind me with your tough guy shtick because you thought I might be a deserter trying to sell my own armor and cover my tracks?"

"If you're an enemy of the NCR, you're an enemy of mine," Boone replied darkly.

"Right." The courier put their hand on Arcade's shoulder. "Let's not repeat that incident, okay?"

Arcade didn't think it was a strong enough statement to convince the 1st Recon graduate, but it did seem to resonate with Boone. Slowly, the sharpshooter's fist uncurled. "Okay."

This appeared to satisfy the courier, who sat back down and signaled the securitron to fetch another tequila. Arcade looked nervously between them and Boone, who didn't seem to be going anywhere. "Should I... should we hold off for today, or..."

"Oh, sorry." The courier made a face. "He's waiting for you to continue, if you don't mind. He decided to throw punches first in Novac and ask questions later, so I kicked his ass and made him promise that if he was going to travel with me, he needed to hear people out before he judged them."

Arcade's gaze immediately swung back to Boone, who nodded so solemnly that he had to choke back a laugh. "O-okay then. Thanks. Uh, let's... keep going."

Veronica Santangelo: "Sorry, I, uh..." Arcade turned to find Veronica swaying back and forth between the conversation she'd accidentally walked in on and the exit, her face cycling through shades of pink. Eventually her curiosity won out and she dashed over to the bar, taking the stool on the other side of him. "Navarro? The NCR crushed it in 2248, or was it 2249... did you have to escape, or did you get out before they came after you?"

"We went south before it was sacked," Arcade answered, bewildered. "My mother and I left with a group of my father's old unit when most of the remaining forces fled east with the remaining leadersh- Veronica, what are you doing here?"

"Well, I originally came up here to tell Six that the King is looking for them," Veronica admitted. "Something about bodyguards and a guy named Warren? Harris? Anyway, it can wait, this is much more interesting. Did you hide in NCR territory, or did you just try to stay out of everyone's way?"

"Veronica," the courier pressed, leaning around Arcade to look at the Scribe. "This is supposed to be a private conversation?"

"Six, do you have any idea how rare it is to find former Enclave members?" Veronica protested. "They're like one-headed brahmin nowadays, on account of the..."

She trailed off in realization, so Arcade finished the thought for her. "On account of the NCR and the Brotherhood of Steel killing them off wherever they could find them."

"Mmm, there is that." Veronica squirmed in her seat. "And technically speaking, I would be obligated to report any known Enclave survivors to my superiors with the intention of having them executed or at least run out of town, but... how old would you say you were, when you left Navarro?"

"Around three."

Veronica beamed. "Well then I can't really call you an Enclave member anyway, since I don't think they were inducting kids into their ranks. Even after we got a hold of them."

"Uh-huh." Arcade studied her for a beat before turning back to the courier. "She's not going to go away, is she?"

"Probably not," the courier replied. "Even if I kick her out, she'll just keep bugging you until you tell her."

"Great." Arcade took a sip of his wine and pointed a finger at Veronica. "Not a word to anyone, okay?"

Veronica mimed locking her lips and throwing away the key. "You got it."

Rose of Sharon Cassidy: "Don't mind me, just trying to re-stock my first aid kit." Cass sauntered over to the bar like she hadn't just stumbled upon Arcade spilling his deepest, darkest secret, and slapped the counter to get the securitron's attention. "Found myself running a little low on my last outing to Red Lucy's in Westside, and I figured House had some of the good stuff hidden away for just such an occasion."

"We were up here for some privacy," the courier said testily, eyes flicking between Cass and Arcade.

"In a goddamn bar?" Cass whistled. "Sorry, must've missed the sign on the door. Or were you being serious, when you said we weren't allowed up here without an escort? Better remind Raul, he was up here yesterday to take in the view. And Veronica, she was making friends with the robots last week. In fact, let's have a staff meeting, it's been a spell since we got everybody together in one place. You can tell your sob story to a larger audience, Arcade."

"You're an asshole, Cass," Arcade said affectionately. "This wasn't supposed to be a performance."

"Oh no." Cass feigned embarrassment. "And here I am, barging in on you like a deathclaw in a doctor's office. The Enclave? Thought you were all extinct by now. Wait 'til Boone finds out."

"He won't find out," the courier warned her in a low voice. "Unless Arcade wants him to. Understand?"

"No argument here." Cass took the other seat next to Arcade and propped her boots up on the bar. "But I wanna hear this too. I don't have strong feelings about those Navarro folks either way, but it sounds like a thrilling tale. Might even take my mind off my own troubles."

The courier looked like they were ready to physically toss her out of the cocktail lounge, but Arcade stopped them. "She's fine. Annoying, but fine. Get your drinks, Cass, and I'll give you the full-length version."

Cass grinned. "That's what I'm talking about. Three bottles of whiskey and one glass, please. And none of that radioactive shit, I'm talking whiskey. Not Dixon Whiskey- whiskey."

[whats-already-been-broken]

Among Us part 2

Circus Baby/Liz: You cannot affect the game to make yourself an imposter, Jesse

Withered Freddy/Jesse: I'm trying to prove a point... If this works I will be the smartest guy in gaming

Toy Freddy/Teddy: Who's watching Game Theory?

Will: Can I go back to torture?

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: Shut the fuck up, dumb whore

Withered Golden Freddy/Michael: That's not very nice

CC: I don't want to exist.

Withered Golden Freddy/Michael: We have a new player. His name is Lally.

CC: Hi, Lally.

Cassidy: Hello Lally.

Lally: Hello!

Circus Baby/Liz: Aww, he sounds so cute!! I love him!!

RXQ/August: Can we start the game?

Shadow Freddy/Joel:...... Liz is in charge of the game.

CC: Mike isn't back in yet. He had to change his username.

Will: Lovely. When Michael is back in, are we starting, or do I have time to use the loo?

Cassidy: What did he just ask?

Circus Baby/Liz: Go use the loo, Daddy. I have to wait for color changes anyway.

Lally: How does this game work?

Withered Golden Freddy/Michael: It's like Clue, but we have to complete randomized tasks as well.

Lally:..... That sounds fun... I prefer hide and seek.

Puppet/Charlie: I'm just spectating from Cassidy's screen.

Helpy/Sammy: I want pink, pls

Circus Baby/Liz: You don't have to type it in the game's chat. We use discord so we can hear each other.

Lefty/Lex: Why can't I have red? It's my favorite.

CC: That's reserved for Mike...

Lefty/Lex: He can have gray

CC: You can have grey

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: If you use purple, you a moron

Will:... We both use purple. Joel Rodriguez uses purple. His twin uses purple. Elizabeth has used purple.

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: I said what I said.

Bonnie/Jeremy: Fritz says he has bad luck and will get imposter again.

Chica/Susie: Fritz is just being a baby

Freddy/Gabriel: Can you guys be quieter on the headphones?

Foxy/Fritz: Yeah, sure, hang on.... AAAAAAH!!

Lefty/Lex: If you do that again, I will kill you in your sleep.

Yenndo/Malachi: Sorry, I'm late.

Lolbit/Logyn:.... He sounds like Corpse Husband.

Lefty/Lex: Very relaxing, you should sing

Bonnie/Jeremy: Or read bedtime stories

Spring Bonnie/Haru: Or narrate pornos

Puppet/Charlie: There are children here!

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: What's a...

Freddy/Gabriel: You don't wanna know.

Circus Baby/Liz: Mike, how long does it take?

Mike:......

Circus Baby/Liz: Mike, your sound isn't coming through.

Mike:.......

Puppet/Charlie: I'll go check.

Freddy/Gabriel: Malachi, please indulge them in at least one of the suggested things.

Yenndo/Malachi: K... ~You made a mistake~

Circus Baby/Liz: Is he on yet?

Puppet/Charlie: No... Sound's not working

Yenndo/Malachi: ~On the day that you met me and lost your way~

Will: I'm unfortunately back. What's happening?

Yenndo/Malachi: ~You saw all the signs~

Lolbit/Logyn: His voice...

Bonnie/Jeremy: So relaxing

Spring Bonnie/Haru: I get you're keeping it PG for the children but you can admit his voice is sexy

Yenndo/Malachi:... But you let it go, you closed your eyes

Bonnie/Jeremy: I don't... Uhm... It's not..... Uuuuh

Foxy/Fritz: His voice isn't sexy! He sounds sleepy and done with our shit!

Spring Bonnie/Haru: You are a child. You don't know what sexy means.

Lolbit/Logyn: I will not admit to any sort of attraction to anyone here

Yenndo/Malachi: *sighs* ~I should've told you to leave~

Mike: Is my Mic working now?

Circus Baby/Liz: Yep! Thanks Charlie!

Puppet/Charlie: I like the singing.

Mike: What singing?

Yenndo/Malachi: ~Cause I knew all the time you couldn't handle me~

Freddy/Gabriel: Are we starting?

Toy Freddy/Teddy: I just finished an entire round of GTFO, why did it take so long?

Mike: My microphone wouldn't work and I could barely hear you guys

Yenndo/Malachi: ~But you're hard to resist~

Will: May Mr. Voznesensky have the red skin? He's annoyed that you have dibs on it, Michael

Mike: Huh? Oh, you can have red. I don't mind.

Yenndo/Malachi: ~When you're on your knees, begging me~

Lefty/Lex: Yes! I am now blood personified!

Chica/Susie: I thought you said you weren't a person?

Lefty/Lex: My character is a person.

Yenndo/Malachi: ~I'll tear you down, I'll make you bleed, internally~

Chica/Susie: Doesn't make sense but okay

Bonnie/Jeremy: Liz, did you mean to click start?

Circus Baby/Liz: Yep! There are supposed to be only 3 impostors, okay? Do not give it away. We won't find out who the impostors are until the end of the game.

Yenndo/Malachi: ~Can't help myself, from hurting you when it's hurting me~

Freddy/Gabriel: Jesse will likely take a screenshot if he ends up as the imposter and send it to me after the game

Withered Freddy/Jesse: I am trying to prove a point. I set it up perfectly and everything

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: Aww... I wanted to be imposter.

Foxy/Fritz: I thought we weren't supposed to give it away?

Will: It could be a diversion tactic

Circus Baby/Liz: Word of the day! Diversion

Mike: It's like leading someone away from the truth by sharing info that seems accurate but is the opposite of the truth

Golden Freddy/Cassidy: Cool

Yenndo/Malachi: ~I don't have wings, so flying with me won't be easy!~

Foxy/Fritz: What the fuck is he singing?

Lolbit/Logyn: Shh, it sounds nice

Malachi: 🎶Cause I'm not an angel, I'm not an angel!🎶

Mike: That was awesome... I am in awe

Circus Baby/Liz: Y'all are so silly. Aw sh-ooooot. Shoot. The lights are out.

[beauvibaby]

you’re mine - j.benn

a/n: wow this gif just killed me, now back to our regularly scheduled programming

requested [x] yes [] no

Request - If I can request... I had this idea, i would love if you could write a fic about it. You're dating Jamie B. and he takes you to his high school reunion, where his ex girlfriend hit on him, and you get jealous, and then he sees it and he feels bad and take you home and shows you how he's only yours. 🥵🥵

Going home with Jamie had been nerve wracking enough to begin with, despite you doing it every summer for the past two years, and his family absolutely adored you. But this year, oh with great happiness, he was dragging you to his high school reunion, which amazing, great, you knew everyone already knew about his life, but now you were going to be the fiancé of who turned out to be one of the most successful students from the school. “Baby?” Jamie called dramatically, worried about being late, you rolled your eyes as you pulled the bathroom door open, Jamie looked up from his phone, sitting on the edge of the bed in his slacks and button up, hair styled just right. “Wow.” He smiled, eyes running over your dress, it was simple, casual, but you dressed it up slightly with your small wedges and lightly curled hair. “Is it too much? Does it look bad? Let me-“ “Y/N.” He cut you off with a chuckle, grabbing your hand to keep you in place. “You look beautiful, don’t worry so much. Who cares what they think?” He soothed you, and it worked until you processed the end of his sentence. “Uh, you care what they think? You’ve been talking about this for weeks!” You gasped, looking up at him with pout, “I just want to make a good impression, you know? You grew up with these people. I mean if I come across bad, then you’ll come across bad.” You explained sheepishly, fiddling with the button on his shirt that was eye level with you. He chuckled softly, cupping your chin to tilt your head up, “well, if they don’t like you then we’ll just leave.” He mumbled, thinking he was easing your nerves, he leaned down to kiss you and you turned your head. “Jamie!” You whined, “that doesn’t make me feel better, I don’t want to be the reason we leave, let’s just go before I change my mind.” You grumbled, only turning even more pink when he laughed deeply at your dramatics.

***

Entering the school, seeing how everyone was mingling and there was no sense of that high school separation, you put the smile on your face but you could tell it wasn’t as forced as it normally was, you’d already been greeted by a couple of Jamie’s old friends that you’d met once or twice, and that definitely helped ease your nerves. You stayed glued to his side though, taking up conversation with the wife’s or girlfriends of some of the men he was talking too, you all began to get a little giggly as you sipped on you drinks, Jamie got whisked off to talk to some other people, he gave you a glance but you waved him off. You were having fun with these ladies, and you wanted him to have a good night as well, this was his reunion after all. “So when’s the wedding?” One of the girls, Cassidy, questioned, smiling at the ring on your hand. “August.” You responded, smiling at the thought of everything you two had planned back in Texas, both of you were ecstatic. From speaking about the wedding, you subconsciously started looking around the room for him. Your eyes landed on him and you did a double take as a woman placed her hand on his forearm and he awkwardly pulled away. You excused yourself from the group as the conversation had begun to die out anyways.

Weaving through the crowd, you appeared at Jamie’s side, lacing your fingers together, he looked down, slightly relieved. “Hi, love.” You murmured, smiling at the lady who was standing there, she looked nice, but you took that thought back as she gave you an odd once over. “Y/N, this is Leah-“ “his high school girlfriend.” She interjected like it held some sort of authority, you casually placed your left hand on his chest, “I’m, Y/N, his fiancé.” You spoke, with the fakest smile and Jamie had to stifle back a laugh, realization hitting him at your sudden attitude. “Oh.” She smiled, falsely as well, and Jamie couldn’t lie and say he wasn’t getting a charge out of how fake you were both being. “When’s the wedding?” You loved answering that question, until she asked it, Jamie took the chance to slip his arm around your waist, tugging you against his chest lightly. “August.” Jamie spoke, a grin over his face, except his wasn’t fake, because he wasn’t jealous. Which says something because normally he’s the jealous one in the relationship. You smiled up at him, as he kept talking about the wedding plans until she finally made up an excuse to leave, you looked away sheepishly, embarrassed that you’d gotten jealous, worried that he would take it as you not trusting him. “Baby, were you jealous?” He questioned, smirking softly when you hid your face from him, he turned you towards him, “don’t ignore me.” He squeezed your sides softly, eyes shining when you finally looked up at him. “Yes.” You whispered, you knew he heard you, but he titled his head to the side, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear that.” He teased, “ugh, yes, Jamie I was jealous, is that what you want to hear?” You snapped softly, looking up at him, glaring lightly. “Yes.” He laughed, you groaned, going to turn away from him again, “you’ve got nothing to be jealous of, don’t you know that by now.” He spoke in your ear, the tone of his voice dropping. You froze in his hold, a bit of excitement running through you at his sudden change, it was rare for him to get like this in public. “I don’t know,” you stood on your toes to sweetly kiss his cheek, whispering into his ear, “maybe you should show me.”

***

Jamie had never been a fast or reckless driver, so to say that he got you back to the summer house in record time, that was shocking. “Jamie.” You chuckled softly, watching as he struggled to get the key in the lock, he was high wired, you may have been teasing him on the drive home. He shot you a look and you all but melted under it, the heat running straight to your core. “Oh, give me the keys!” You finally snapped, taking them from his grasp, easily unlocking the door, and pushing it open, pulling him in by his hand. You squealed softly in excitement when he pined you between himself and the now shut front door. “How am I supposed to take you seriously when you're squealing like a child?” He muttered, feeling slightly defeated, you tossed your clutch into the living room, hearing it bounce off the couch and hit the floor but you couldn’t be bothered to care. You took charge and placed his hands low on your hips before pulling him in for a deep kiss, “didn’t you have something to show me?” You mumbled against him, smirking in success when he groaned into your mouth, his hands sliding behind your thighs, drumming his fingers against them. You took the not-so-subtle hint, pushing up off your feet allowing him to pick you up with ease, legs wrapping around him, arms lazily slung around his neck, you began trailing down to his neck. Jamie squeezed your thighs tighter as he expertly maneuvered to the bedroom, having to force himself to not get distracted by you nipping at his skin, his biggest weakness, any kind of kiss to his neck, chaste or sexual. “Jamie.” You gasped, normally he tossed you onto the bed, or hovered over you, this time though he sat on the edge, roughly pulling you down onto his lap. He let his own short gasp of surprise when you rolled your hips down on him, “two can play at this game.” You mumbled, leaning back to smirk at him, he hummed, giving you a once over. The little lipstick you had left on your lips now gone, lips slightly swollen from the kissing, eyes wide in anticipation. Jamie ran a hand over your cheek, pushing your hair to one side before letting the tips of his fingers glide down your neck, delicately running to the strap on your shoulder. He glanced up at you when you let out a soft whine, he smirked at your eagerness, his brown eyes staring into yours, “patience, baby girl.” He mumbled, pushing the strap down, his lips following the material.

As much as you loved the sensuality of what he was doing, you didn’t have the patience, not after feeling the way you did earlier. You took a leap of faith, grabbing a fistful of his hair and tugging on it, removing his mouth from your shoulder. “Sometime tonight.” You snapped, eyebrows shooting up, you reached behind yourself and tugged the zipper down on your dress. He reached to move your hand away, finishing the action for you as you made quick work of the buttons on his shirt. You climbed off his lap, quickly pushing the dress off your frame, biting your lip when he took a second to admire you, no matter how many times he’d seen you, he always made sure to make you feel beautiful. Jamie stood, towering over you slightly, he shrugged the shirt off his body, grabbing you and pushing you towards the bed. You let your body fall back on it, looking up at him innocently as he undid his belt, he kicked his pants off, moving over you. He hooked an arm under your back, easily maneuvering you to the center of the bed, your head falling onto the pillows, he went back to teasing you lightly, kissing right above the lace trim of your bra, “don’t be such a tease.” You whined, the noise quickly turning to a moan when he yanked the cup of your bra down, tongue circling around your sensitive bud before pulling away with a smirk, moving to the other side as you tugged on his hair lightly, hips trying to grind up to get some kind of friction, his hand rested on the base of your stomach, pushing you down into the mattress. You moaned as he moved back up to your lips, allowing you to arch your back long enough for him to properly remove your bra, tossing it behind him like a horny teenager. He paused his movements, undoubtedly knowing your thoughts and letting out a soft chuckle, you smiled up at him, grateful that even in the most serious of moments you could still be yourself. Although, you quickly reminded him of the task at hand when you cheekily reached down and dipped your hand into his boxers.

“Fuck.” He moaned out, hips involuntary thrusting towards you, “if you’d quite teasing, you wouldn’t be a whining mess.” You quirked a brow when he let out a noise, one you’d certainly heard before when he was painfully hard. He grumbled under his breath, something about “trying to make it nice for you”, before kicking his boxers off and all but ripping your panties off of you. He hovered over you, catching your lips in a distracting kiss as he sunk into you, a whine rising up your throat, he stilled for a moment, lifting his head to catch your eyes. You grinned up at him, pulling him back down, “you can move.” You whispered, kissing him again, feeling him pull almost all the way out before thrusting back into you. “Feel so good, baby.” He spoke into your neck, your head rolling to the side to give him more room. You moaned in response, running your nails down his back, smirking when it made his hips stutter in their pace.

That only spurred him on as he began moving quicker, he slammed one hand down onto the mattress beside your head to hold himself up as he used the other one to throw your leg around his waist, “fuck!” You moaned, digging into his skin with your nails, “yes, yes, Jamie.” You gasped, the all too familiar feeling tightening in your stomach, between the spontaneity of this and the drinks, you knew neither of you would last that long. “Close?” Jamie managed to ask, lifting his eyes to meet yours, except he didn’t find yours as you had them squeezed shut, trying to wait until he was ready. He snuck a hand down between your bodies, watching as your eyes shot open. “Come on.” He grunted, glancing between you and where your bodies were repeatedly connecting. That’s all it took for you to unravel, clenching down on him as you rolled your head back, eyes shut in bliss as he chased his own high.

He finished with a strangled moan into your neck, leaving a sloppy open mouthed kiss as he panted.

“You should get jealous more often.”

taglist: @softstarkey​ @kempe​ @mtkachuk​ @literarycharleton​ @wtfkie​

[grantyort]

Clearing the Air

[The trio cruises along the empty city streets. Chris is fast asleep in the backseat while Daniel fidgets anxiously in the front.]

SEAN: Need to pee or something? 

DANIEL: Nah, I’m just nervous.

SEAN: [chuckles] About what?

DANIEL: Uh… Nothing. Never mind.

SEAN: [sighs] Whatever you say dude.

DANIEL: [turning to Chris] Is he... okay?

DANIEL: Yeah. He just hasn’t slept well since… you know.

SEAN: Well before he wakes up, we need to have a serious talk about all this.

[Sean pulls the car over to the side of the road. He gets out and sits on the hood, motioning Daniel to join him. Daniel reluctantly agrees]

DANIEL: Sean Iisten-

SEAN: No, you listen! I went through hell just so we could stay in this country, so you could live a normal life! Now you’re just gonna throw it all away on some wild goose chase?! Don’t you even care? I swear this is like Nevada all over again!

[Daniel looks ashamed and on the verge of tears]

DANIEL: I’m s-sorry Sean. It’s just that… we haven’t seen each other in months, and you don’t answer my texts and I thought if I-

SEAN: No… you’re right. That wasn’t fair. I’m guess I’m still… trying to figure this whole thing out.

DANIEL: I know.

SEAN: Why didn’t you just tell me, instead of pulling a stupid stunt like this?

DANIEL: I… didn’t want to drag you into this.

SEAN: Well guess what Daniel? I’m in it now whether you like it or not. In case you haven’t noticed, we’re kind of a package deal.

DANIEL: I’m sorry.

SEAN: There you go again. Always apologizing after the fact. For once, I want you to think things through before you go running off on your next crusade!

DANIEL: I’ll try.

SEAN: You damn well better. Remember the deal we made with the Feds, no big splashes! If they catch even a whiff of what you’re doing… ¡se acabó! They’ll throw my ass back in jail and lock you in some government black site. We’ll never see each other again. Is that what you want?!

DANIEL: No of course not! It’s just… Chris has lost everything. I just want to help him get answers and justice. It’s the least we can after all he’s done for us. We owe him that much!

SEAN: [scoffs] You’ve really grown up, haven’t you?

[Sean leans over and hugs Daniel who is taken off-guard but sinks into Sean’s arms, savoring the familiar comfort]

DANIEL: What was that for?

SEAN: Oh nothing. Just getting you back for earlier.

[Daniel smiles and rests his head on his brother’s shoulder]

SEAN: Enano, listen… I’m sorry I’ve been so… distant. College’s just been hectic as fuck. I’ve got a side-gig going on, and I know haven’t always been… there for you, like I should be.

DANIEL: You don’t have to apologize, Sean. You’ve already done so much. You should go live your own life for a change. Besides, I’m not a kid anymore. I can take care of myself now.

SEAN: [laughs] I’ve heard that one before.

DANIEL: I’m serious! You don’t have to worry about me. Go to parties, hook up, cram for exams or whatever. I don’t wanna be a burden anymore.

SEAN: You’re not a burden, Daniel and worrying about you is kind of in the job description. I mean the hours are long and you don’t get paid, but at the end of the day it’s all worth it, you know?

DANIEL: Yeah I know… thanks, Sean.

If Daniel threatened Sean back at the bus depot:

DANIEL: S-sorry for what happened back at the bus station. I don’t know what got into me.

SEAN: You should be. We don’t see each other for weeks and the first thing you do is try to pick a fight.

DANIEL: I just… got caught up in the moment.

SEAN: Hope you haven’t been doubling up on your pills again.

DANIEL: Of course not! I’m not stupid Sean!

SEAN: Never said you were.

DANIEL: Sorry. I don’t wanna fight.

SEAN: Me neither. But just for the record, I would have kicked your ass.

DANIEL: (rolling his eyes) Sure Sean.

SEAN: I did last time.

DANIEL: That didn’t count! You caught me off-guard!

SEAN: That’s kind of the point, genius. You think the bad guys are gonna warn you before attacking?

DANIEL: What bad guys? Besides, even if one of them got the jump on me, I’d still stop them all. Easy-peasy!

SEAN: This isn’t a superhero movie, it’s real life. You gotta pay attention to your surroundings at all times!

DANIEL: (mockingly) Whatever you say… sensei.

DANIEL: Are you… doing okay?

SEAN: What do you mean?

DANIEL: You know… with college, and track and everything. I don’t really know much except what I hear from Lyla-

SEAN: Oh you mean your little spy? I still haven’t forgotten about the library incident you know.

DANIEL: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

SEAN: Yeah, yeah! play dumb! You’re lucky that marker was washable otherwise your ass would be grass right now!

DANIEL: I thought you were supposed to be able to see that sorta stuff coming.

SEAN: I was asleep! Besides that’s not how it works!

DANIEL: Pfft excuses!

SEAN: Don’t push it. I’m still mad at you, you know.

DANIEL: (making a funny face) Yeah? How about now?

SEAN: [laughs] Okay. I’m letting you off the hook this time.

[Daniel pulls a chock-o-crisp out his pocket and begins to eat]

SEAN: Still eating those?

DANIEL: (mouth full) What? I’m hungry!

SEAN: I read an article that chock-o-crisps can stunt your growth. You better cut back or you might be stuck an enano forever.

DANIEL: That’s bullshit! I grew 3 inches since Christmas. I’ll probably be taller than you soon!

SEAN: Ha You wish! [he ruffles Daniel’s hair]

DANIEL: Stop it! You know how long it took me to get it just right?

SEAN: Since when do you care so much about your hair?

DANIEL: Chris says that it looks cool like this.

SEAN: I thought you “always looked good”.

DANIEL: Yeah, but I just like it better this way.

SEAN: Okay, okay. Hands off the hair. Got it.

DANIEL: So Sean, you...

Seeing anyone? 

Talk to Mom lately?

Seeing anyone?

SEAN: Taking an interest in my love life? Who would've thought?

DANIEL: It’s not like I really care. I just… don’t want you to get lonely.

SEAN: Don’t worry about that, enano, I got plenty of term papers and angry TAs to keep me company.

DANIEL: I’m being serious Sean.

SEAN: Well if you must know, I did meet someone recently. We were actually supposed to have dinner tonight but… you know.

DANIEL: Oh… sorry.

SEAN: (jokingly) You should be. We don’t even live in the same state anymore and somehow you still manage to cock-block me!

DANIEL: (cheekily) That’s my real superpower!

SEAN: (rolling eyes) Yeah, yeah keep laughing. Who knows? Maybe someday, I’ll return the favor.

(They both laugh)

SEAN: How about you? How’s school? Anyone giving you shit?  

DANIEL: Nah. Everyone likes me, well except Wilkes and Brad. But they’re assholes. Anyway, there is this dance coming up next week and I still don’t have a date. I was thinking of asking this one girl, Millie. We text and stuff and I guess she’s pretty!

SEAN: Whoa dude, slow down! Focus on keeping your grades up. You’ve got plenty of time for that stuff later. Me on the other hand. I think I’m just about ready to die alone.

LYLA <-> FINN/CASSIDY (Determinant)

LYLA:

DANIEL: What about Lyla? She’s single! 

SEAN: Dude no! It’d be way too weird. We’ve known each other since forever. It would never work. And besides, I’d never take her from you.

DANIEL: S-shut up. That was just a stupid crush! I’m totally over her! 

SEAN: (deadpanning) Oh no. I’m sure she’ll be devastated.

CASSIDY:

DANIEL: What about… what’s her name? The smelly hippie with the purple wig.

SEAN: Cassidy? She’s all the way up in Canada, dude! Plus, I need to get clearance every time I leave the country. It would never work.

DANIEL: That’s okay. You can totally do better!

SEAN: Oh ouch. Still holding a grudge, eh?

DANIEL: I just think… you’re too good for her.

SEAN: I’ll take that as a compliment. I guess.

FINN:

DANIEL: What about Finn? Weren’t you totally into him?

SEAN: Finn’s still in jail dude. What are we supposed to do? Make out through the glass?

DANIEL: Haha true.

(If Sean forgave Finn in Episode 4)

DANIEL: Do you ever wish things turned out differently with him?

SEAN: Sure… sometimes, but life’s too short for regrets.

DANIEL: You’re starting to sound like Mom.

SEAN: I’m gonna pretend you didn’t just say that.

(If the player did not forgive Finn in Episode 4)

SEAN: He’s applying for early parole and wants to me be at his hearing. Can you believe that?

DANIEL: You’re not going, are you? He totally used us. He deserves to be locked up!

SEAN: Whoa where’s this coming from? Didn’t you use to be his biggest fan?

DANIEL: What are you talking about?

SEAN: (mockingly) Oooo Finn’s so cool! Finn lets me do whatever I want. I wish Finn was my brother!

DANIEL: What?! I never said that! Besides, I was just a stupid kid back then!

SEAN: Yeah and no one’s denying that.

DANIEL: Whatever. If you want to go, go.

SEAN: Nah… I’m done with Finn. There’s plenty of better guys out there.

Talk to Mom lately?

SEAN: Yeah got a call from her two weeks ago. Business has been booming ever since… they legalized it in Arizona. So, expect an extra big birthday present this year.

DANIEL: Bet you want to move there so you can (he makes a toking motion)

SEAN: Haha, maybe after I graduate!

DANIEL: (sigh) I miss Away.

SEAN: I do too. There was something special about that place. Everyone there was so chill. Not like here.

Ask about Away

DANIEL: And Joanne? Is she still-

SEAN: [sigh] The latest round of chemo didn’t work. So they’re preparing for the worst…

DANIEL: I want to see her Sean, before…

SEAN: I know enano. But Arizona’s too far and way too close to the border. The Feds would never go for it.

DANIEL: I don’t care!  I need to say goodbye to her, in-person.

SEAN: [sigh] Okay. I’ll talk to Flores, see if we can work something out.

DANIEL: Thanks Sean.

SEAN: Arthur and Stanley got a new puppy! His name is Rufus. He’s a bit of a handful but super cute.

DANIEL: No way!

SEAN: I’ve got pictures.

DANIEL: Dude! Send them now!

Ask About Sean’s Eye:

DANIEL: How’s your eye?

SEAN: Can’t complain. Still gets itchy from time to time but that’s what the eye lube’s for. 

DANIEL: Ew, can you not call it that?

Ask about Sean’s Appearance

DANIEL: Dude what’s with the beard? It looks all itchy and gross!

SEAN: You’re just jealous cuz you can’t grow one!

DANIEL: Could too! I just don’t want to.

SEAN: Yeah sure… Have your heuvos even dropped yet? 

DANIEL: Ewwww, shut up!

SEAN: I’ll take that as a no. And since you love my beard so much. Here, feel it! [He rubs his cheek against Daniel’s.]

DANIEL: (laughing) Stop Sean! That tickles! Quit it!

SEAN: RESPECT THE BEARD!

[Sean drapes his arm over Daniel who leans on his shoulder. They look at the night sky together]

DANIEL: Whoa... check out that moon!

SEAN: How about a team howl? For old times’ sake?

DANIEL: Yeah! Diaz Lobos! 

[They howl together as “Into the Woods” plays]

< Previous

[lassluna]

CS January Joy Day 31: A Happy Ending (well, that depends on where you stop the story)

Emma Swan was a criminal. A thief. A forger sentenced to four years for bond forgery. Killian Jones was the agent sent to catch her. And catch her he did, but after an escape attempt, an exploded PO Box and a deal an unusual partnership is formed, one that will give them both all that they ever wanted or lead to mutual destruction. White Collar AU

Ao3 FFN

AN:I am very thankful to @csjanuaryjoy​ for finally getting me to write this. It's been a wild year and hopefully this next one will bring a bit more joy. Thank you @teamhook​ and @ultraluckycatnd​ for beta reading for me. 

“How did it start?”

It started like most stories if she’s being honest, which she rarely is. 

 It started with a stolen car, stolen watches, so much stealing, so much theft, so many lies that she had forgotten where Emma, the lost orphan girl, ended and where ‘The Swan’, grifter, forger, liar, thief began. Her reputation grew, as did her steady collection of wealth.

It started with a boy and a girl, lost and alone and unwanted in the world and turned into some wannabe Bonnie and Clyde duo who just wanted to be seen, to be heard, and to take back what the world took for them.

They lied, cheated, and stole for the sake of it. And they were good at it. There’s something about being alone and unwanted that just made it easier to pretend. Sometimes a lawyer, other times a high profile gambler rubbing elbows with mobsters and politicians alike. One time she pretended to be Leila Lucas, princess of a far off land in order to get close to some crown jewels. They pretended that these lives, these rich, luxurious important lives were theirs. They pretended that they deserved these things because they could take them. 

And take them they did. The car, the watches, the bonds, the jewels, the paintings, they took them all. 

Emma loved the paintings, the art, the beauty. She loved looking at things that gave people feelings. It made her feel a little less alone.

Neal loved the money, the thrill, the ways the world bent to their will, the way it rushed through their veins. 

It started with young love. It started good, and they were happy.

//

“How did it end?”

It ended like most stories, or at least it seemed like that to him. 

He was a simple FBI agent, chasing her, tracking her, trying to prove to the world the crimes she commited. Part of him always thought that was what she’d wanted. She wanted her crimes to be seen, noticed. She wanted to be known, not disappear into the shadows.

He understood that, he was trying to prove himself too. Killian was a good FBI agent with a shitty childhood and an even worse family history. But he wanted to be great. He wanted to escape the shadows and prove that he was better than those who came before.

He just wanted to do his job. He wanted to catch her. He wanted to catch 'The Swan'. He spent years hunting her. He was supposed to be just one more FBI agent who tried to catch a break and then went on to the easier, flasher cases. 

But not Killian. He had no intention of giving up. Because The Swan was special. She was as elusive as they come, never staying in one place too long, always running, running, running.

There were two of them he knew, but it was always her. She was the one planning things out, making the big moves, making the forgeries, being seen. Never him. He knew that once they got her, his crime spree would end. She was the one that they had proof for. She was the brains and the brawns behind their every operation.  

But the problem was that as the years went by, as he got closer to catching her, he learned a lot about Swan. He learned how she likes her hot chocolate: with cinnamon. He learned she also had a shitty childhood; an orphan at birth, bounced around to one foster home after another. He learned she hated violence. Her jobs were smart and with little to no chance of anyone ever getting hurt. 

And she got to know him too, if the gifts and the birthday cards proved anything. ‘Know thy enemy’ as they say. But no one ever said to send your enemy flirty postcards, uber eat deliveries of your favorite take out places on stake outs, or gifts to your younger sister on her birthday.

He doesn’t remember when it happened, but they had an appreciation for each other. 

Smart, his little sister said once when he was home for a few days before he had to go back out to chase her. You always liked smart. 

It ended like most stories, a betrayal and a trap. He knew it was a trap and let her fall right into it. Neal Cassidy, her partner in crime traded away ‘The Swan’ like she was nothing. Honor among thieves seemed to have skipped him in that lesson.

The look on her face when she was caught, trapped, was painful to him. Her eyes were green fury as the truth became obvious to her. Her eyes looked at Neal who was leaving out the back, and then on him.

"It's about time we met properly," he told her as the uniform officer arrested her. “Agent Jones of the New York FBI White Collar division.” She didn't respond to him. He never expected her to. 

It ended with a defeated bird who flew too close to the sun. 

// 

“Then what happened?”

Then began nearly four years later with Killian Jones, being pulled away from his current case for a jailbreak. ‘The Swan’ had escaped 3 weeks short of her 4 year sentence. It had been years since he even heard her name. Her capture had been his shining moment, it had made his career.

 Her escape had been flawless. Her long hair, chopped off, a guard uniform ordered with the warden’s own credit card. 

She was in the wind with no hope of being found.

“Road blocks, wanted posters, people posted at the train stations and airports,” the marshals told him, but Killian knew her, knew Emma. 

They wouldn’t catch her with the traditional methods. 

She didn’t escape for the traditional reasons. 

She had been a model prisoner, kept her head down and out of trouble, so why leave now? It had taken months of planning. So he went back, when did she start planning her escape? When did things change? 

She got visits from him, from Neal. The vile excuse of a man who got her caught in the first place. He knew better than to judge someone for going back to familiar patterns. Especially trapped in prison. 

But his visits stopped nearly a month ago. The man went from visiting weekly with a smile and a magazine to nothing.

So Killian looked at that tape, the final visit from the conman who got away with it. He wasn't surprised by what he saw. His last visit was final. He had all the body language of it. A pained smile, looking shifty and nervous. Emma had stood, slamming her fist on the glass; he'd seen tears on her cheeks when the guards dragged her back, back towards her cell. She’d screamed and pleaded.

But Neal left anyway.

“Ariel,” he said to the younger agent. She was a bright new recruit, his favorite of the probies. “Get me anything you have on Neal Cassidy and all his known aliases.” Ariel was very good at finding exactly what he needed in moments like this. A cold blooded shark in a sea of misinformation.  

 They find her in an empty apartment, cradling a dreamcatcher in her hand. She looks the same as the last time he’d seen her. Heartbroken. They were in Neal's apartment. The one he rented a few weeks after her trial. 

(Killian remembered seeing him there, full of sorries and excuses. Word on the street was that no one wanted to work with him after that. Honor among thieves was apparently much more important than the man thought.)

“How many are here?” she asks as he enters. Her back towards a pillar in the middle of the room.

“Between the FBI, the Marshals, NYPD...everyone,” he chuckled. He’d told them they hadn’t needed to corner off the streets like this. Emma had never been violent. “They’re going to give you another four years for this, you know that right?”

Emma laughed a humorless laugh. “I was two days late,” she admits, obviously not caring one bit about what he said.

“And that’s all he left you?”

“It means goodbye,” Emma admitted. He gave her a small smile, knowing nothing he can say will help. “I can’t believe they dragged you here for this after all this time.” He wasn’t that surprised. Catching her the first time had been his defining moment; if he failed the second time, they could write it off as a fluke. 

“It’s been a long time, Swan.” She smirked at the name. “But can’t blame them. I was the only one who caught you, none of the others even got close.” She looked at him quizzically. 

He was dusty, fresh from an exploded PO box that his latest case--nicknamed The Dutchman-- had left specifically for him. There were strange threads left on his clothing that none of the Harvard grad FBI agents could tell him anything about. It was something that had agitated him greatly before he’d been pulled here, to find her. 

“This guy’s good,” he told her, watching her look him over. “Maybe even better than you. I’ve been hunting him for a few months now and-” She moved quickly, standing and plucking one of the threads off his jacket blazer. It shined strangely as it caught the light. Killian could hear the marshals, or maybe S.W.A.T. pounding through the doors a few floors beneath them.

“What’s it worth if I can tell you what this is?” she asked, handing it to him. 

“What-”

“I can tell you what these are right now in exchange,” she said quickly. He could practically see the thoughts and plans race in her mind. Time was running out.  “In exchange for a meeting,” she concluded.

“A meeting?” he asked.

“A meeting in one week. Deal?” she asked. They were coming. Killian nodded. Despite his misgivings, it was only a meeting.

“That’s the new security fiber to the Canadian $100 bill,” she said, just in time for the other agents to drag her away. Her smile is bright and mischievous as she refuses to break their gaze until the last possible moment. “I’ll see you in a week!” 

//

“And I was right. It was. According to Agent Jones, it nearly created an international incident.” 

“Did you catch him?”

“We did.” 

It hadn’t been easy, not for Emma now wearing an ankle monitor to keep her in check--a fact that made her insides squirm at the thought of being tethered-- where anything going bad meant she had to go back to prison with no hope of finding Neal.

It made her heart race in that familiar way of when she was a child and got placed. When one wrong move meant they'd send her back. 

“He did a good job disappearing,” Ruby told her in the shadows of Granny’s guest house. Because her friend knew that her first priority was finding Neal.

(She’d run into the old woman at a thrift store looking for some new clothes to wear after seeing the seedy motel Killian had tried to put her in. 

She’d met a kindred spirit in the older woman, a thief after her own heart so to speak. Emma would never forget the look on Killian’s face when he saw her new view. He’d turned to the older woman, “You know she has a criminal record right?” he’d asked her.

Granny had taken it in stride, leaning forward with a smirk. “So did my wife.” she said with a wink.)

"Keep looking, Ruby. I need to find him," she told her friend, her oldest friend. She’d been her partner in crime once, when working with Neal had come with extra stress and baggage. With Ruby things were simpler, easier. Ruby was in the information business. She knew what was being run and where. She knew all the local fences, all the local forgers. If Neal was in the city, Ruby would be able to find him. 

Ruby nodded, but she looked worried. She glanced at the anklet in apprehension. Then back at her. All the tell tale signs that Ruby wanted to say something but worried for her reaction. 

“You know you don’t need him right?” she blurted out. “You’re so much better than him Emma, more talent for this stuff in your pinky then he has in his whole body. He was nothing without you and everyone knew it,” she said, practically bristling with every word. “He betrayed you, why go through so much to find him?” Emma felt her fists clench, along with anger, fury, loss. 

Neal Cassidy was a loaded question where she didn’t have an answer. 

But she pushed it down. She pushed it down deep. A smile appeared on her face. There was so much. So much she didn’t know, so much no one knew. 

Emma couldn’t risk it.

“It’s complicated Ruby,” she said finally. “But in the meantime, what do you know about The Dutchman?”

It had been difficult, Emma had noticed a particular signature in some forged Canadian bond. It was one that Emma recognized. Lilly Prescott. She was a well known forger that was very good at staying well under the radar. The FBI had never even heard of her which was a testament to her ability. 

Emma had tried to work with her once. Her work was good and her planning was even better. But the woman couldn’t help but take things that didn’t belong to her, couldn’t help but press Emma’s buttons in all the worse ways.

It had taken seeing her tongue down Neal’s throat to learn two things: that they couldn’t work together and that it was time to grow up.

And grow up she did when they walked into a church Lilly had been restoring. The little wench had leered at her and Killian. “Emma Swan,” she’d said with a cheeky grin when she caught them comparing her work with that of the signature. “I don’t exactly feel comfortable having a known art thief around my work.” 

“Allegedly,” Emma corrected her. She’d never been caught for her art theft. A point of pride if she’s being honest. Just a few forged bonds.

She says glancing at Killian. “Who’s your friend.”

“Just a friend,” Killian assured Lilly as they shook hands.

“Emma doesn’t have any friends,” Lilly pointed out. “Unless you count Neal of course. But with friends like that, who needs enemies?” she laughed.

The name turned in her stomach, like something good that turned rotten, like a vice grip on her that she still couldn’t shake.

Not until she found him.

“Of course,” Killian agreed, glancing her way. I know she’s trying to get under your skin, his gaze told her as she pushed her walls firmer in place. If Killian could see that this woman could affect her, it worried her what else he could see.

“You wouldn’t know anything about a thief known as The Dutchman would you?” Emma asked innocently. Because if there was one thing Emma knew, it was that Lilly hated being outdone. “I hear his work is second only to...oh you know.” She smirked at her. “Allegedly of course.” 

“Of course,” Lilly said, an edge to her words. It’s all Emma needed to hear. Because she knows she did it. That’s what she tells Killian after they’re asked to leave the church.

“I know she did it Killian.” his hand on her arm halted her pacing. “Did you see the look on her face?”

He did, she knew he did. “I believe you Swan, but we need proof,” Killian insisted. “That’s how this works.”

Proof came with Emma breaking into Lily’s warehouse and Killian coming and arresting them both. She’d cut her anklet after all, seizing all Lily’s things that were in plain sight.

It turned out reading all those law books in prison counted for something. 

//

“And then your partnership was born.”

And it was good, if Killian was honest, it was better than he ever expected when Emma had proposed this deal. She showed up every day for work. She often showed up in ridiculously expensive suits with a fedora on her head. He’d groaned when he first saw it, earning an elbow in his side and a “You just don’t understand fashion.”

(Trouble, like the woman who occasionally gave Emma tips about the criminals they were hunting, the woman who introduced herself rather reluctantly as a Missy Wolfe when Killian had showed up unannounced, who looked him over with a predatory glare and called him a ‘suit’. 

“She doesn’t trust cops.” Emma had explained later. “She’s harmless, I promise.”

But she sure did know how to drink all Killian’s beer that’s for sure.)

Every day they would use her knowledge of the criminal underworld to find white collar criminals. After several weeks, they had a 92% closure rate and an even higher recovery rate.

But there was still this thing hanging above them. Between them. A secret they both knew about but refused to talk about.  

And his name was Neal Cassidy. 

Killian could tell she was looking for him no matter how many times he told her not to. Neal was her weakness, the one thing that caused the normally level headed woman to lose her bloody mind. This was a good thing for her. Emma Swan would rot behind bars and this way at least she was doing good. 

Emma Swan liked doing good. He could tell, even when she refused to admit it.

She brought him his picture one day while they’re on their way to speak to a witness, the picture was from an atm in Tallahassee. “Please.” She begged. “I need to find him, to see him. Come with me please, send an agent, the marshals, send me in full shackles and prison oranges I don’t care.” 

He had never seen her so desperate, not when he caught her, not when she asked him for this...arrangement. “Swan...what we have here...it’s good. It’s a second chance for you, why risk it for him? He put you here. Why risk it all for him?”

She didn’t respond, hands tightened into fists as she looked down. Killian swore he saw something in her expression something that would explain how this intelligent woman being so infatuated with-

“You’re right.” She says, her voice level. Eyes hard like steel. “There is no reason for me to be chasing Neal Cassidy.” She hissed the words.

Killian doesn’t have her super power, but he knows there’s more to the story than she’s letting on. “If there’s something you’re not telling me-” But she shook her head. 

“You said it’s not happening, and what does it matter what I want.” She says shifting on her feet, shifting the anklet like she always does when she feels particularly trapped. “I’m just your CI. A convict without a choice in any of this.” 

He stops her right there. “Swan, when have I ever treated you like you don’t have a choice in this? If you don’t like what we ask of you, if you think it’s too riky all you have to do is say the word and-”

“-And I go to prison.” She snapped. “I go back there and rot.” Her temper was flaring and Killian stepped back, fearing getting burned. 

“When have I ever threatened you with that?” He asked sincerely. “When have I ever told you that unless you go undercover with this mobster, or that corporate trader that you’d be shipped back?” He says. 

Emma doesn’t respond, head dipping slightly. “What about the other agents? That’s what they said would happen.” She admitted in a small voice. “And really, the jobs we do, they’re fine. I don’t feel endangered.” She assured him simply. 

“Emma, I swear to you, your safety and happiness is just as important as these jobs. You are not just a criminal.” He says sternly. He steps closer to her, wanting her to look at him and hear him. Seeing her cowed and unnerved unsettled him. “Try something new darling, it’s called trust.”

“Trust doesn’t exactly come easy to me.” Emma admitted. “There’s really no way I can get to Tallahassee?” She asked once more.

Killian sighed.

The moment they finished the job, he sent a message to Ariel. 

 “Get me anything you can on Neal Cassidy’s recent activity and do it discreetly.” He says. 

“Why?” She asked. It was why he valued the younger agent as much as he does, she knows when to put her head down and do as he asks, but she also knows when to press him for details.

“Emma’s not going to stop pursuing Neal.” He told her. “I want to know what she finds out, finding Neal ourselves is the best way to know what she’s up to.”  

She handed him a file on the man the next morning, a file Killian took back home with him at the end of the night. He couldn’t risk Emma catching him snooping on her ex. He felt silly hiding it, but the thought of her knowing he was doing so filled him with dread.

“Maybe you should tell her you’re jealous.” Belle informed him as she came home from class, seeing him consumed with the file at their kitchen table. His little sister always seemed to come home from her classes at just the right moment to see him when he’s consumed with a case. 

“I’m not jealous Belle.” He says quickly, closing the file. “I’m being thorough.”

He is. There was something there, his gut feels it. There’s something about this man that Emma was hiding from him. 

“After all the cat and mouse you’ve done with her, I bet she’d tell you if you asked.” Belle informs him. But Killian disagreed, he knows she won't be truthful with him if he asked. It’ll be an evasive answer framed to have him pointed in the opposite direction. It was how she worked while on the run. This is the only way. 

“How do you know?” Killian asked. “You’ve never even met her.” He reminded her. 

“And who’s fault is that?”

//

“Then the Diamond heist.”

“Then the Diamond heist”

It had happened quickly. A diamond heist that had been done with such perfection Emma was generally impressed. They had video surveillance in the vault and nowhere else. It was as if they just vanished, and considering that New York had extensive video surveillance it was impressive. 

It was a job she would do once upon a time. Just the kind of take that was exciting enough to catch her attention. But that was in the past. 

Emma was determined to keep her head down when it came to jobs. She had a bigger problem on her hands. Someone had Neal, or at least was putting pressure on him. He’d signaled her from an ATM camera in Tallahassee. 

Their plan had always been Tallahassee, a city in the middle of Florida of all places. No one would expect anyone who had stolen millions of dollars of artifacts to retire there of all places. It was perfect. They were going to have the life they always wanted growing up.

(It just so happened that Emma had told him that’s where she had her stash at. 

A lie. A trap. Bait he had fallen for now after all this time. Never once did he leave his apartment in New York, only now did that stone come loose. It had to mean something.)

But not everyone knew that Emma was done with that life. Not even her most trusted confidant --and partner in more than one crime--Ruby believed her.

“Of course I didn’t do it.” She’d hissed into the phone when the brunette asked her excitedly. “But do you know who did?”

“None of my contacts know anything, sorry Em. I’ll keep an ear out.” She answered. Emma can hear the sounds of birds on the other end. She knew better than to ask. “That’s why I thought it was you.”

It wasn’t long after that that the forged diamond is shown to have a small swan etched into it. One that matched the ones she left in her forged bonds. It became very clear very fast that she was being framed. 

“Killian, you need to know I didn’t do this.” She insisted, backing away from them in the parking lot after having been confronted. “You have to believe me.” Her eyes looked for him. She needed to know he believed her. 

It didn’t matter who else did, just him. Because if Killian didn’t have her back then who would?

“Killian?” She asked when he didn't meet her gaze. He did eventually. He looked saddened. “You know I was set up right?” 

Killian didn’t respond. It made her furious. It reminded her of the real situation here. She was just the criminal and he was just her handler. Any semblance of a partnership was just a figment of her imagination.

“Swan...” He said softly. “If what you’re saying is true, I swear to you I will get to the bottom of it.” I believe you. “But until then...Emma Swan you are under arrest...”

Back to prison. Back to the cell. Back to being helpless while Neal is off with-

She couldn’t go back. Not yet. Not when someone was trying to frame her. The same person who was holding Neal, she was sure of it.

So Emma did what she did best. She ran. 

She ran and ran and ran. She’d spent every day on her walks to the office coming up with escape routes through a city she knows too well. The agents depend too much on the anklet to catch her. 

The tracker is tamper proof but no one ever said it was foolproof. All it takes is a sharp knife and a toss over the edge of one of the many footbridges in Manhattan for it to be a useless blinking distraction. 

Every bone in her body tells her to run as fast and as far as she can. It wouldn’t take much to get out of the city, some cash from one of Ruby’s stashes and a visit to some supplies for a new ID. All she would have to do is say the word and Ruby would run with her. She was good like that, always ready to get into all sorts of trouble for her. 

But if she did, if she ran then she would be as good as guilty of this crime. She would never get a chance to prove her innocence. She would never get her chance to find Neal.

She had to find Neal. 

I believe you. Killian had tried to tell her that. Maybe it was time to try that thing called trust...

It’s how she meets Belle because while Killian is off coordinating with the Marshals, she’s drinking tea with the sweet brunette she had sent an 18th birthday gift to a few years back. 

Killian Jones’s little sister was as fierce as her brother. Belle asked her if she’d done the crime she’d been accused of.

No.

And she had leveled her with a steel glare. “Then Killian will prove it.” She’d said with such certainty, such conviction that she understood a bit about Killian’s stubbornness. It was genetic. “You just need to trust him.”

Emma did. Emma really did, more than she trusted anyone. He was honest, a good man. He was fierce keeping her out of the line of danger when at all possible and he cared for her. Moments like this reminded Emma of why everything had gone so wrong.

I’m tired of running.

“I’m going to call him.” Belle says, not a question. “If you don’t think you can, if you really think Killian won’t have your back after everything, you have until then to leave.” Emma doesn’t move. Not when Belle is talking to Killian about her classes, about having found a stray bird in their patio. (Code for her she assumes)

That’s when she sees the blinking in the cable box and she knows. She knows that this is all a lot bigger than the two of them.

Killian was positively furious when he arrived, all red faced and fuming. “Bloody hell Swan!” Killian hisses when he storms in. “Why did you come here?” Emma didn’t know, not really. Just an instinct and her instinct was telling her to come here. That he would know what to do. “If you were going to run, why come here?! You involved my sister!”

Emma swallows back her words, fear taking a hold in her chest.

“Killian. Give her a chance.” Belle said, taking a place inbetween. “Just listen.” He did.

“I’ve been tracking Neal.” Emma admitted. “Someone...someone has him.“ she takes out the photo she’d shown him. The whole photo, she had been too afraid to show it to him earlier, the hand on his arm, the shine of something pressed against his ribs. Something that looked very similar to a revolver. “They want something I stole but I can’t-I don’t know what it is. I had a friend of mine poke around and I think I got too close.” She explains. “Because they framed me. It has to be connected, Killian.” 

There was no other explanation, stirring this fight or flight instinct in her bones. But she has to hold firm, she has to trust in Killian. Because here she was, all her cards on the table. 

“Maybe, but this is not how to do things.” He says sternly. “Running isn’t going to get you anywhere but caught or-” Killian swallows back his words. “That marshal really has it in for you Swan.”

(The marshall in question was one Walshe Greene, appearing the moment they returned to the office wanting to speak to her about the fact that some of her anklet’s tracking data had gotten corrupted. 

Data that just so happened to coincide with the robbery. He’d been dickish and entitled, coming into her space when she didn’t crumble under his thinly veiled threats.

Threats she didn’t tell Killian about.) 

She pointed over to his deconstructed cable box. “Not just me.” She hissed his way. A bug was in his house, in his home. The home he shared with his sister. “Both of us.”

  She sees his barely concealed furry, the shock and fear on Belle’s face. “Whatever is coming, it’s coming for both of us.”

//

“She was cleared of that.”

“She was. Then you seemed to find her rather quickly, despite telling Marshal Greene that he would catch her with wanted posters and roadblocks.”

“I have exceptional luck.”

Things shifted from there. Instead of working this case on one end and Emma from another, Killian felt her walls fracture ever so slightly, and perhaps the guard he put up around her also came down ever so slightly. Perhaps too much. 

(Once they found one bug in his home, Belle was insistent that someone come over and deep clean their place of any form of listening devices. It wasn’t long after the case got wrapped up that Emma called over an ‘exterminator’. 

“Missy Wolfe.” She introduced herself to Belle, a smirk on her face. “But you sweetie can call me Red.” Belle had raised an eyebrow at her. 

“When Emma mentioned she knew someone, I expected you to be...”

“Less gorgeous?” She’d said with a grin. “And when our mutual friend had said the suit had a cute sister I definitely imagined someone like you.” A surge of protectiveness surged within him at the way that Red was looking at his sister.

“I think you’re here to do a job” He reminded her. 

“I am quite a skilled multitasker.” )

 She showed him her lead to whoever was after them. A message in the video surveillance, of their breakup and Neal messaging her in morse code by tapping at his side. Dream It meant the dream catcher which led her to a meeting in Grand Central Terminal at the end of the week.

Killian had been there when he called her. Seen her panicked face when she heard his voice. “Give him what he wants.” Neal had said. 

“What is it he wants?” She’d asked.

“Give him everything. It’s the only way I can come home, the only way for us to be together.” He said. Killian could feel her heart break when she said the words.

“I can’t Neal. It’s the only leverage I have.”  She looked up and Emma ran. She ran because she saw him. She saw her lover that she can’t reach, can’t catch, can’t have. Killian makes him out for a moment but he’s gone. He’s gone by the time they get to where he was, a roof of a building looking down at them. 

Emma collapsed in a sob and he was barely in time to catch her. Barely in time for him to hold her. She cried into his chest, something rare and primal and aching. 

“I just want him back.” she sobbed and his heart ached for her. He understood the feeling of losing someone you love, of not being able to be with them. He holds her, hand running through her hair, her blonde locks that are growing in from the cut she’d done months before. His head finds a place on the top of her head as he tries his best to comfort her. 

Emma came back to herself after a moment, pulling away, rubbing her sadness from her face as easily as putting on a mask.

“We are late for a case aren’t we?”

They are. But there’s something about the vulnerability of Emma in that moment that conflicted with the flirty beautiful woman in front of him that distressed him. Perhaps it’s the ease that her walls come back up. 

Or maybe, they aren’t walls, maybe it’s a loosely fitted cork, because their next case involves a kidnapped child and a pair of parents so obsessed with the reading of their dead aunt’s will to even know when the little girl had been taken. 

Questions like if the will had been forged, or if the inheritance was filled with counterfeits had become meaningless without the child. A fact that exploded out of Emma at the father who was planning on leaving the country with ‘his’ inheritance before the FBI could interfere. The man had crumbled before her blunt display of emotions, her fury and her grief.

“She deserves better than to be just another pawn in whatever game the two of you are playing.” She hissed. “It’s not about money, take it for someone who’s had a hell of a lot. There’s more to life than numbers on a check and if anything happens to that kid you’re going to learn that the hard way too.”

He understood. He understood then, and he understood later. 

“Case hit home for you didn’t it?” He asked afterwards over a beer once the child was reunited with  parents that may have learned a thing about family from Emma. An old bookie of the husband had tried to pressure him into complying. 

“Little kids are cute, what can I say.” She said evasively while taking the offered beer. That was another sign Emma was still hurting, she hated beer. “She deserves better.” That she did. “You did too.” He smirks, knowing that she knew him better than most. Yet he wondered exactly how much she did know.

“And how much exactly do you know about my childhood?”

“I know that you loved your father, you idolized him. You had his knack for numbers.” She said. “I know he used you as a diversion when the feds came in and busted down your door. He left you and your mom with nothing.” She swallowed and he could see her picking her words carefully. That meant she knew more than most. “I know you learned that he had at least two other families, an elder brother in DC. and a younger sister in Georgia who appeared at your door when you had just lost your mom. You took her in no questions asked.” Killian remembers the day he met his elder brother. The man had been older and took one look at him and wanted nothing to do with him. Killian was just another reminder of what Brennan Jones had done. He also remembers the day several years later when a teenaged Belle had knocked on his door. He took one look at her and remembered what Brennan had done, but he swore to accept her no matter how much the reminder hurt. 

“So you know quite a bit, Swan.” He responded. “I also know a bit myself.” He countered. 

“Of course you do.” She laughed, “I bet you even know my shoe size.”

“8.5 or sometimes 9 if the shoe runs small.” He said with a smirk. “You left a pair in that hotel in Rio.” A pair of bright red pumps that matched a bright red dress. “Why do you care so much?” Or maybe it’s the beer talking, talking too much if he’s honest. “Neal betrayed you, he left you, why do you care so much about saving him?”

The laughter dies from her face, something heavy takes its place. “Seeing my position a little too similar to your own?” She deflected. “Someone who got left behind just like you?”

“Doesn’t change the fact that you deserve so much better Swan.”

“What exactly do I deserve Agent Jones.” She said, leaning forward. “I’m a criminal.” That she is. But he doesn’t think about that when he leans forward and cups her cheek. He doesn’t think about that when he brushes strands of blonde hair out of her face, nor when he smiles and-

//

"Has Agent Jones ever behaved unprofessionally?"

Killian Jones was the embodiment of professional. 

He had to be, with a family history like his. Even Emma’s heard of it through her underground contacts. She’s heard of the legendary Brennan Jones who masterminded a theft like no other, millions of dollars gone in a blink of an eye.

She’d heard through the office gossip about him. About how no one trusted him when he was recruited right out of college, his superiors always made things difficult. Never trusting that he wasn’t just like his father. 

Killian Jones was the embodiment of professional, that’s what made Emma enjoy the chase so much. Because she knew it was a true battle of wits, not like the muscle head marshals. Killian was smart and honorable. If he was going to catch her, it would be done the right way.He was just like her.

 But the way he looks at her sometimes is so not professional in all of the best ways. 

Sometimes he looks fuming, mostly when she’s pushed the limits a bit too far, gets in over her head, and just makes it out by the skin of her teeth. But always looks relieved when she makes it out.

Sometimes he looks like she holds the sun and the moon because she’s figured out some con or trick someone pulls. It always comes with a “You’re brilliant Swan.” when no one else is listening. She always shoots back a knowing smirk, tucks a loose strand of blonde behind her ear and replies with “I know.” It always makes him roll his eyes but his expression never wavers. 

And that one time, after a particularly draining case, after that little girl with parents who didn’t give a damn about her had been rescued and she thought...she thought he was going to kiss her and...

And Emma may have to admit to herself that she wanted him to. 

But with Neal, and the FBI frowning upon CI handler relationships, not that a kiss meant a relationship...God Emma was confused. They hadn’t kissed and perhaps she had misread the situation completely. Because he’d practically scrambled away when it happened.

He’d ran out the door with some made up excuse on his lips, a deep blush on his face. 

Maybe it was all in her head, maybe she was the one being unprofessional. But she can’t help the way he makes her feel more than her past, more than what she can do. 

With Neal it had always felt like it was them against the world.

With Killian she thinks maybe they can just exist in the world, maye make it a little better in the process.

What makes it worse was a conversation she hears between Ariel and Killian days after their almost kiss. Days after she spends a night dreaming of what could be. 

Emma hadn’t meant to be eavesdropping, but she had a lead on their new case and was heading into his open office when she heard them talking in tense low voices.

“What was your talk with Neal like?” The younger agent asked him. It makes her stop in her tracks, makes her heartbeat wildly.

He shot Ariel a glare and told her to keep her voice down. But he hadn’t refuted her claim. 

He doesn’t tell her about it later when she finds a more convenient time to talk to her about the case. 

“Why wouldn’t he tell me?” Emma asked Ruby later in her apartment over a tall glass of wine. Because she desperately needs the alcohol to calm down her racing thoughts.

“Emma...Does it ever occur to you that maybe...maybe Killian is involved?” She contemplated, sitting across from Emma with her own equally tall glass of wine.

“Involved?” 

“Killian is in the prime position if you think about it.” She muses. “You under his thumb, maybe Neal in his back pocket. Maybe it was him all along.” Emma shook her head because no. It couldn’t be.

Killian Jones was the embodiment of professional.

“Then why is he keeping his meeting with Neal a secret when you’ve been upfront with him? After all, his own father is a master of crime, maybe the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree?”

//

“So she trusted you?”

“Yes.”

Emma Swan does trust him. 

Killian remembered that case they had a few months back, Emma had gone and broken into a shady hospital without backup or a warrant. The case had involved Granny’s granddaughter not getting a kidney and she’d gone rouge. 

Something he warned her against a half dozen times by this point. 

She’d broken in and gotten caught and drugged up to the gills. Killian had had to get in and break her out without anyone realizing. He’d even stolen the security tapes.

“I trust you Killian...out of everyone in my life, Neal, Ruby...you are the only one I truly trust.”

Emma did trust him. She trusted him with her free smile when she was feeling particularly excited out on a job. She trusted him with her fury when things were hard and she felt truly trapped by their arrangement. She trusted him with her tears when she thought about Neal. She didn’t often say much but he just knows. 

He knows her.

Emma trusted him to know her and Killian knew it’s not something freely given. 

But then out of nowhere that guarded expression on her face returns. Any move he made seems to be met with passive aggressive responses and half truths. She had her barely contained fury back beneath her eyes. 

It reminded him of a young agent who was furious when he learned that all the older agents were laughing behind his back. When he learned that they would never take him seriously because he was damaged. He was a joke. 

Emma Swan was no joke.

It unsettled him, he can’t figure out what changed. 

Or perhaps he was reading too much into her responses, after all, he was keeping a rather large secret from her. Because despite not wanting to hurt her, not wanting to break her trust, he feared this new information would be too much for her. Too much temptation. 

Because there was nothing more tempting to Emma than information about Neal Cassidy. 

It had taken some favors and a considerable amount of FBI weight throwing to secure the meeting, but he’d had it. Killian had had a meeting with Neal Cassidy. 

He knew what they wanted from Emma.  

(“A music box, she stole it in Germany just before...about a year before you caught her. They won’t let me go...they won’t let us be together without it.” He’d assured him.

“How do we know any of this is real?” He asked him. “How do we know this isn’t some game to get in her head?”

Neal gave him a disbelieving smirk. “I guess you don’t know. But considering you don’t know the whole story, I have to say that I have the advantage.”

“I find that whenever the supposed hostage talks about having the advantage they are rarely telling the truth.” He replies firmly.

“Ask Emma about the job we ran in October. If she tells you the truth then you’ll know exactly why Emma has to hand over the music box”)

He knew what they wanted from Emma, but he wasn’t sure if telling her would be smart. He honestly wasn’t sure if she could handle it.

That is, until in the middle of a job, a sting operation Emma had snapped. She’d nearly turned him in, her eyes had turned steely and she hissed that she knew. 

“I know you have Neal, that this whole thing is a game, a trap, a trick.” she seethed. It had completely caught him off guard. 

“What?!” He’d demanded, but the mark was listening, hell all his agents were listening. They couldn’t do this here. “If you have ever trusted me, you’ll give me a chance to explain myself otherwise get back to the case.” He’d said sharply. He met her steely glare with her own and nodded once.

I trust you.

She’d proven it later that day when their mark had locked in an airlock and they only had one canister of air. She’d shoved it into his grasp. “I trust you.” She’d whispered out loud this time. Please don’t play me for a fool.

He hadn’t, of course. They’d found their way out and sitting there in front of a multimillion dollar mansion swarmed with agents and bundled in shock blankets, he’d told her.

“I met Neal.” He admitted her. Her eyes are wide, but she’s not surprised. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t think you could handle it.” But he was wrong, so wrong. 

“You had no right to keep that from me.” She replied sharply. “But I understand why you did.” her expression softened. “I know how I must look to you: a love sick fool chasing after a man who hurt me. Risking everything for him...”She trailed off before fixing him a firm gaze. “What did he tell you?”

“He told me what he wanted. A music box.”

“A music box.” Emma repeated. She laughed at her words. Laughed like he’d told her the most ridiculous joke in the world. “Then let’s go get the music box.”

//

“And where was the music box?” 

“Under our noses the whole time.”

 “Bloody hell Swan!” He’d cursed. “How?” 

It had been one of her most daring moves. She’s not sure why she decided to do it, but after she thought of it...the idea was just too intoxicating. It was a challenge, a dare and perfect. So perfect.

Getting the music box had been difficult, a job that didn’t really interest Neal. It was a little too flashy without enough reward. Thankfully a fence of hers had been able to take his place on the job.

 (A fact that Neal was not happy about.) 

Graham had been good, and it had gone off nearly flawlessly. She’d given him a cut of the profit she would make when she sold the music box--and a slap for a stolen kiss that Neal still doesn’t know about--except she never did get around to selling the damn thing.

She’d meant to, really. But this was right in the beginning of Agent Jones pursuit of her and she’d thought he was cute and enjoyed teasing him with her gifts. 

So Emma had set to work. A good forger can make something worthless look real, but only a great forger could make a priceless artifact seem like a fake knock off.

So that’s what she did. No one ever knew, they didn’t even suspect it. 

“My sister!” Killian exclaims again. “What did I tell you about involving her?” Emma shrugs. 

“To be fair I had already long sent it to her by the time you gave me that warning.” She told him simply, picking up the item. “I assume it came back clean when you sent it to the lab?” It was smaller than she remembered, a fake gloss painted on to mask it’s trace components.

“They traced it to a manufacturer in China and Belle liked how it sounded. Bloody hell, what would we have done if she had tossed it like I wanted to do?” She’d found a similar looking one and stole the packaging. Emma shrugged. 

“I didn’t exactly anticipate for some rogue agent to kidnap Neal for this thing. I didn’t even steal it for anything other than morbid curiosity.” She admitted. “Now that we have it, when can we get the meeting?” She asks.

Killian sighs. “I’ve put word out, hopefully Neal will contact me and we can set a time.”

“Or.” Emma adds. “We can contact the person pulling the strings behind this, behind everything.” She snaps. 

“We don’t know for sure.” Killian says with a calming gesture.

“You really think Walshe has nothing to do with this?” Emma snaps. “After coming into town just in time to frame me for the diamond heist?”

Killian doesn’t respond. Emma takes the music box tightly in her hands. “This has to end. It has to end now.” 

“Swan-” But she steps out of his grip. “We need to do this the right way, catch him red handed, not just hand him what he wants, when will it end?”

Oh it’ll end. The stakes were too high for Emma not to see to it that this cat and mouse game end now.

Plans circulated in her head, how to get out with the music box, how to make the exchange before Killian could talk her into a more by the book plan. Sometimes things couldn’t go by the book. Sometimes the ugly gritty way was the only way.

Killian’s phone rang loudly at his side. He picks it up, giving Emma a look. We’ll figure this out, you just need to trust me.

But something on the other end was clearly very wrong. His eyes narrowed and she could see something darker and fiercer just below the surface. “Stay there Belle.”

He could hear the younger girl talking quickly on the phone, Killian’s hand clenched. She was clearly very upset.“I’ll be right there. Do not say a single word until I get there.” He glanced at her. “We need to go now. Belle’s just been arrested.”

//

“She was arrested because the Marshalls believed a phone call she received from an unfamiliar number was our father.”

“Was it?”

“Just a spam caller”

The marshalls had wanted him out of the way, and they got it. It hadn’t taken much. They had Belle in handcuffs, her eyes were red as her classmates looked on, Walshe’s grip on her was rough and his words had been rude and vial and then he’d had the balls to mention Emma. So he’d swung and decked Walshe Green in the face. 

It felt good. But it ended with him in cuffs besides Belle. He’d watched a wide eyed Emma leave with Ariel, considering her handler was about to be put on suspension he was glad she wasn’t being taken into custody next. She’d been strangely silent through the whole ordeal.

 Emma had tried to deescalate the situation at first, but a comment Walshe had made left her frozen. Emma Swan never froze up.

“You never know, a parent’s greatest desire is to see their kid, wouldn’t you agree Emma?”

It wasn’t until afterwards. After he was back home missing his badge and gun, he realized two things. 

The Music box was gone.

This had never been about Neal.

//

“When we were originally tackling The Swan, Emma took a year gap where we couldn’t find a single hint of a job she was running. The working theory was that she was waiting for the heat of her last job to die down.”

“And now?”

“Now I realize that she went underground for a different reason.”

They met at the drop point. 

Emma felt bad for having Ruby steal the music box from Killian’s house, but it was the only way. No one was supposed to know about him. No one was ever supposed to connect her to the little boy that was born in New York Hospital in October of that year.

They were supposed to disappear and start a new life together, Tallahassee. 

Neal and her called it Tallahassee. It was the end game plan, retire and move to Florida or some island in the tropics. But Neal had never wanted to go clean, so Emma took her son and ran. 

So Neal set a trap for her. She set a trap so she couldn’t disappear with their kid. 

“When you get out.” He said, holding one of his toys, one of her son’s toys “We can be a family. It was only four years.”

Emma had hated him for four years, for robbing her of that time together, of wanting to be a father and changing his mind and then changing his mind again. 

It wasn’t until now, until Neal was faced with losing their kid, of him being abducted and held above their heads that he truly cared. Maybe, maybe it’s not too late for them.  

They met at the drop point, except there was no Neal, only Walshe. But she doesn't let that shake her resolve.

“Where is he?” She demanded. 

“Neal is around.” Walshe said cryptically. “I hear you have my box.” She didn’t deny it. 

“I’m not talking about Neal.” She said. “You’re not getting a damn thing unless I can see my son.” The man smirked wider than he had any reason to. 

“Don’t trust me?”

Emma didn’t dignify his words with a response. He gave a large sigh and opened his car door. There in the backseat, passed out in his car seat is Henry. She hadn’t seen him since he was an infant, but she knew. It was her son. Her four year old little boy looked positively exhausted but in good health. It made her gasp in relief, tears gathering in her eyes. 

He’s gotten so big.

“Where’s my music box?”

She gave it to him without a moment’s hesitation. Her only focus was pulling that boy into her arms and never letting go. She was never letting him go again. “Neal said to give you these.” Walshe added after the box is placed securely in his car. It was an envelope. She takes it with the hand not around the boy. 

Papers...She realized a whole new identity and not just for her. Neal, Emma and Henry Nolan. A normal happy little family. It was good, extensive. 

A happy ending after all. Four years ago this is all she’d ever wanted. 

“There’s a jet waiting for you, it’ll take you wherever you want. The three of you can disappear.” Walshe explained. 

“Why?” Emma asks. “Why go through all of this? Kidnapping my son, using him to get to Neal to get to me? Just for that.” Because it wasn’t worth that much, not enough for all this.

“Because my employer wants it.” Walshe said cryptically. But he doesn’t elaborate, he doesn’t need to. It says all she needs to know.

There’s someone behind the curtain. 

“You better get going. Neal is waiting for you.” The address was written in the envelope, so she settled Henry in his car seat in her car and then she headed out. 

But not before she sent Belle the most expensive collection of sketch books and paints money can buy, art school wasn’t cheap and she had talent. Real talent.

Not before she called Granny and thanked her for everything.  

Not before she called Ruby and told her about Henry. The papers...

(“I don’t know why you didn’t trust me to tell me the truth Emma.” She’d said. “But for what it’s worth I’m glad you are finally getting the life that you want. But you know what I always say-”

“A happy ending.” Emma breathed. “Is all about where you stop the story.”

She could feel Ruby’s grin through the phone. “From the moment we met, I knew your story was going to be exciting, but my question is, is this where you want to stop the story?” ) 

But Emma didn’t have time to contemplate her words. She needed to go. They had to get out, they needed to run. This is what she always wanted.

She was 50 feet from the plane when she heard her name being called out in the terminal. 

“Swan!” It makes her stop in her tracks. She can’t help but feel her chest tighten at the sound of her name. She turned to see him. His suit is rumpled, tie missing. He looks like he ran all the way here. “Swan wait.” She did. She had to.  

“You can’t stop me Killian.” She said. “You can’t.”

He nodded. “I know, all of this was sanctioned. It’s all an op as far as anyone can tell.” He agreed. “Legally I can’t interfere.” 

Legally.

“Why are you here Killian?” Sha asked. 

“I’m here to remind you of what you’re walking away from if you get on that plane. I know what you want Swan, I’ve always known. You want to be a part of something. You are here.” She bit her lip, he was smiling at her, something delicate and desperate. He wanted her to stay so badly. 

“Neal once said that we run. We run until when we run from something we just miss it.” She recalled. 

“You don’t need to run anymore Emma. You can stay. You and your son. You can stay.” He promised. “You don’t have to look over your shoulder anymore.” 

“Why are you here Killian?” She asked again. Because it can’t be for her. It didn’t make sense. She’s a criminal, a convict, a fraud. She didn’t deserve for him to look at her like that.

“Because you sent Belle art supplies. You called Ruby and Granny. You said goodbye to everyone except for me.” He reminded her “Why?”

Why hadn’t she? 

“Because...” she trailed off. “You’re the only person who could change my mind.”

He smiled at her, close enough to cup her cheek. “Did I?” She doesn't speak. She can’t. She leans in and kisses him. Something she never dared to want. Never dared to even consider. 

It was better than she ever imagined. It was something that she would surely miss if she got on that plane. 

But is it enough? Is it enough to turn away from a definite happy ending? Or is she walking away from it?  “Killian...

Emma didn’t get a chance to contemplate the issue further.

 Because when she looks back at the plane, at Neal’s face in the window of the plane, before she has a chance the plane explodes.

//

“And you know the rest.” Killian says. “They immediately took Emma into custody. Investigators descended on the terminal, Walshe went underground and you’re here to determine if my actions warrant you taking my badge.” 

The investigators glare at him, clearly not believing some of what he’s saying. But they’ve been glaring at him since he stepped into the room. It was probably a side effect of having just interviewed Emma. 

But it doesn’t matter what they believe. All that matters is what they choose to do. They can choose to give him back his badge and gun and let him do his job. Or they won’t.

“Do you believe Ms.Swan set the bomb that killed Mr. Cassidy?”

He looks them dead in the eye. “No.” He says pointedly. “She would never do that.” Not just because she was supposed to be on that plane, not just because her son was supposed to be on that plane but because Emma wasn’t a killer.

They don’t ask him any more questions. 

He walks out the door with his badge, his gun and a warning. But there’s time to worry about that later. Right now all Killian wants to do is see her. He wants to see if she’s there. If she had left before he was done or if she was waiting for him.

And she is. She’s leaning against his door of his car a smile on her face and a-

“Another hat Swan?” He asks. Emma smirks, removing the hat and placing it on his head. 

“I think it looks pretty good.” Emma says with a smirk and a subtle bite of her lip. “What do you think?” Now it’s Killian’s turn to smirk. She looks brilliant with that hat, so he places it back on her blonde head of hair. It does little to distract from the brand new tracker on her ankle, but he appreciated the attempt. Its slimmer chases less according to the memo Emma had emailed him..

“How’s Henry?” He asks. It had been a few weeks since she met the boy, since he’d caught him and his mother from the explosive blast of the plane that killed his father.

“Adjusting.” She says, her grin fading. 

Emma wasn’t allowed to keep him, social workers didn’t feel comfortable given that she was a current convict with an unusual situation. Thankfully Ariel was a registered foster parent with a spare bedroom. Henry had immediately taken a shine to Ariel and her husband and their current foster, a six year old girl named Melody. 

It wasn’t perfect, but Emma could see him as often as she wanted while she applied to earn back rights she never should have lost. 

“What now?” Emma asks. Her hand drifts to his. Her hands are softer than he’d thought. He leans in close, not too close but closer than he should. Closer than a handler should be with his charge. But he was close enough to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. She’s smiling. 

“Now? We have another case.” He tells her. 

“And later?” She adds. “What do you plan to do about Walshe, and Neal and-”

“I don’t know.” He says honestly. “But whatever we do, know that we’ll figure it out together.”

[slapshot-to-the-heart]

Flatbush & Atlantic: part x

part i part ii part iii part iv part v part vi part vii part viii part ix

And we’ve finally come to the end of Cass and Mat’s story! I want to thank every person who’s read this over the past few months, especially those of you who have reblogged, commented, and shared this with your friends. Your feedback means the world to me, and please tell me what you think of this final part! I’ve also got some ideas floating around for an epilogue, so don’t be surprised if that pops up in the next few weeks.

part x

May 21 (fri)

For once, it wasn’t Cass’ alarm that woke her up. Her internal clock didn’t let her sleep in past 6, but as she lay in her bed, comforter pulled up to her chin and curls up in a haphazard messy bun, a realization struck her. She didn’t have anything to do, and that was just about as far from normal for her as possible. Normally, she’d be hopping in the shower at this time, getting out and shoveling some cereal down her throat before running to catch the train, or desperately trying to finish some last-minute reading before an early lecture. Her grandparents’ flight didn’t land at JFK until 1, and she wouldn’t need to leave until an hour before that to get Mat and drive to the airport. 

Padding out to the kitchen, she just caught Ryanne, who was about to leave for a clinical rotation. “What department are you in this month?” Cass asked.

“OB/GYN,” Ryanne responded. “I got to observe a birth the other day, and it was one of my favorite things I’ve gotten to do so far. Obviously I don’t know for sure yet, but I think I might want to match into it. You get to do a little bit of everything — there’s some surgery, some routine care, some deliveries. And with the Black maternal health crisis, I figure we need all the Black OBs we can get as a country.” 

Cass smiled. “That’s wonderful, I’m glad to hear.” She knew that Ryanne had been a little stressed out with the prospect of trying to pick a residency; she hadn’t felt drawn to any of the other rotations she’d gone through quite like this one. 

“What about you? What’s your schedule like today?” Ryanne asked as she poured coffee into her travel mug. 

Cass flopped down on the couch, looking over at her. “It’s just...I have nothing to do. Nothing needs to get done. No cases to read, no essays to finish, no paperwork to file or anything. Chris gave me this week off for finals anyways, so I couldn’t even go into the office if I wanted to because there’s just nothing for me to do. Do you know how rare that is for me?”

Ryanne laughed. “Cass, I’m in med school. The last time I had a true ‘off day’ was two weeks ago, and even then I spent most of it studying.” She slung her backpack over one shoulder. “See you tonight, have a good day, babe!”

After some toast and a smoothie, Cass was back on the couch, trying desperately to think of something to do. She thrived on being busy, thrived on feeling like she was needed and contributing to something worthwhile. Pushing herself up, she walked back to her room, deciding to change and go out for a run. Cass liked to keep in shape and exercise as often as she could, even though it had been a few years since she had been on an organized sports team. She was usually able to make yoga classes at the school gym twice a week, but typically didn’t have the spare time in the mornings for a run. And by the time she got back it was almost always dark, way too late to even think about going out alone. 

Lacing up her tennis shoes and grabbing her AirPods and keys, she set out, down the stairs and past the door. As she jogged down the streets, making familiar turn after familiar turn, Cass realized something remarkably profound. Every place she passed had played a part in the last three years. St. Lucy’s, where she had stumbled in with inconsolable tears after her abuelo’s stroke, lighting a candle and praying with some old Italian woman for his recovery. The bodega on the corner run by Carlos Gonzalez, one of the first people she met when she moved to the city and the only one who knew how to smoosh her sandwiches down how she likes. The Edible Arrangements where she, Stella, and Ryanne had bought Alicia a congratulatory fruit bouquet for finally asking out her coworker Juliette. They had been dating for six months. The high school she passed every morning on her way to the subway station. These were the people and places that had made her life what it was, and she owed them her thanks. 

An hour and five miles later, Cass decided to call it quits, walking the last few blocks back to the apartment as a sort of cool-down. She jumped in the shower, throwing her hair up in a towel once she got out and resigning herself to watching whatever was on TV. Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives it was, apparently. Four episodes and one snack break later, it was time to get in the car to head over and pick up Mat. Cass drove down Manhattan Island, tapping her fingers in boredom as she hit yet more traffic. It was noon, why was there even traffic in the first place? She pulled into the visitor’s spot in the underground lot of Mat’s apartment complex, taking out her phone. Just got here! Mat popped out of the elevator a few minutes later, holding a bouquet of tulips. “Sorry I’m late, I was going back and forth between tulips and sunflowers for awhile, but I figured the pink was maybe a better choice? What do you think?” Cass started to laugh, and Mat looked offended. “What?”

“Babe, it’s so sweet that you want to impress my grandma, but have you thought about how the poor flowers will fare?”

His brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

Cass adjusted her seatbelt, leaning over. “We’re going to be out for awhile. We’re not going straight back to their hotel. So…” she prompted.

“They’ll wilt.” Mat finished, his face falling. 

She covered his hand with her own. “Don’t worry. It’s a sweet gesture and I’m sure she’ll appreciate them. We’re all going out for dinner after the ceremony tomorrow, why don’t you bring them then?” 

He perked up. “I’ll run up and put them back in a vase, be back in a few!” Mat gave Cass a quick peck on her cheek, leaving her with just one question. Mat owned vases? He slid back into the passenger’s seat shortly after, clicking his seatbelt in and connecting his phone to the speakers. 

Cass rolled her eyes. “I don’t know a single guy your age who’s not obsessed with John Mayer. It’s kind of weird, honestly.”

“You don’t like him?” Mat asked curiously. Cass was usually into more guitar-based, acoustic stuff, so he figured she’d be into at least some of his stuff. 

“Some of it,” Cass responded, pulling out of the lot and onto the street. “Go ahead and play it, I don’t mind at all. Not what I’d usually put on if I’m alone, that’s all.”

Mat nodded, looking absentmindedly out the window. “So, what should I know about your grandparents?”

Cass’ face immediately burst into a smile at their mention. It was always so clear how much she loved her family, and that was one of Mat’s favorite things about her. How hard she loved. “Alright, so it’s Dolores and Roberto Cabrera. They’re wonderful people, I genuinely think you’re going to like them a lot. They’re both super fluent in English, so don’t worry about communication. They originally immigrated to Texas when they were in their teens, abuela was a housekeeper at a few hotels in San Antonio and abuelo worked in the fields for awhile before getting a job at a little hardware store in town, where he worked until they retired. My mom’s the middle of four, two older sisters and a younger brother.”Mat listened intently. “My abuelo’s a little more rough around the edges, so don’t be surprised if he gives you  a little bit of a hard time, but it’s not out of malice or anything. He’s always been very protective over us, my mom and her siblings, and now us three. He might do the whole ‘nobody’s good enough for my Cassidy” thing, but he’ll get over it. He means well.” 

She glanced over at Mat, who was looking decidedly nervous. “Seriously, chou, it’s going to be fine. Abuela’s totally different, they’re like polar opposites. I can almost guarantee that she’ll say something to the effect of ‘if my granddaughter loves you, I love you.’ Very much go with the flow, she’ll probably want to come over to your apartment and cook for you.” Her expression softened. “As long as you’re kind and respectful, they won’t have an issue with you, Mat. They’ll see that you treat me how I deserve to be treated and love me like I deserve to be loved.”

Cass pulled into the garage by the international arrivals terminal, cutting the gas and checking the time. “The flight was supposed to land at one, so they should be getting out of passport control by the time we get inside.” It was a little after one thirty, but if there was anything Cass knew, it was just how long customs could take at an airport as big as JFK. Even in the middle of the afternoon on a weekday, and even though her grandparents were travelling on their American passports and could use the citizen’s line, she had heard that it could take upwards of an hour or two to get through. 

The concourse was pretty bare apart from a few kiosks selling “I ❤️ NY” shirts and a surprisingly busy Noah’s Bagels, so Mat and Cass made themselves comfortable on one of the rows of plastic chairs lining the room. The arrivals screen had marked their flight from Mexico City as having landed nearly an hour prior, so it was little surprise when Cass popped up from the chair, straightening her shirt and walking over to a couple that he could only assume were her grandparents. Mat quickly followed, catching up to her just as she threw her arms around her grandma. “Abuela, te extrañé,” she said, the sound muffled by Dolores’ scarf. She pulled back, kissing her grandpa on the cheek before stepping over to Mat, one hand placed reassuringly on his back. “Abuela, abuelo, this is Mat, my boyfriend.”

Mat stuck his hand out, shaking theirs. “Mr. and Mrs. Cabrera, it’s so amazing to finally meet you. Cass speaks so highly of you, and she always talks about her summers in Hermosillo.” 

Dolores pulled Mat in, embracing him from the start just as Cass had expected. “Mat, it’s wonderful to finally meet you. Cassidy has told us so much about you, it’s clear she loves you a great deal.”

Mat ducked his head and blushed. “I’m not sure if she can love me more than I love her, but I’m happy to be in such good company.” 

He took both of their suitcases as Cass gestured to the sliding doors. “I want to get back to the car before they charge me for another half hour,” she said. 

Mat slid the bags in the trunk of the car as Dolores got in the passenger’s seat. With a gulp, Mat realized that meant he had to sit next to Roberto. He had been perfectly nice on the walk over, but as Cass had warned him, it was clear that he was a little guarded. Whether that was just his personality or whether Mat had yet to earn his trust hadn’t been determined. 

Her grandparents had been to New York once or twice before, but it had almost always been just to fly in before driving up to visit Cass’ family in Connecticut; they had never really been able to see the city. Cass  felt strongly that that had to change, so she had arranged for a mini-tour of Manhattan before they got dropped off at their hotel for the night. “So, Mat,” Dolores said, turning around in her chair, “Cassidy tells us you’re a hockey player? That must be so exciting, how long have you been playing?”

Mat nodded. “Yes ma’am. I play for the Islanders, so we’re right here in Brooklyn, but I live over in Manhattan. I’ve been playing the sport since I was four or so? Really little. But I just finished my fourth season on the Islanders. And it is exciting, I love being with my team and being on the ice, it’s one of the best feelings in the world.” 

“That must keep you busy, though?” Roberto asked gruffly. 

Mat froze. He couldn’t lie and say that he was home all the time, able to be there for Cass as often as he’d like to, because he wasn’t. But if he let on just how often he was gone, would that make him even more wary? “Oftentimes, yes,” Mat began slowly. “The team’s usually on two or so road trips a month, they’re usually about a week long. But they’re balanced out with plenty of home games, and there’s lots of guys who balance the job with a family and other responsibilities. I’m always excited to be able to be back in New York, I love it here. And to be with Cass.” Roberto nodded, not seemingly totally satisfied but content enough to not push the issue further. 

“He’s really good about spending time with me, abuelo, even though we’ve both got busy schedules,” Cass added, catching Roberto’s eye in the rearview mirror. “We meet in the morning before a class to get coffee, or lunch in between studying if I’ve got time. I go to every game I’m able to when he’s playing here in the city, or over in Jersey. We spend plenty of time together, he doesn’t blow me off. You don’t have to worry.” He seemed much more at ease with his granddaughter’s response. 

It was a whirlwind three hours around New York, Cass playing chauffeur as they went to the top of the Empire State Building — her pick — in St. Patrick’s Cathedral  — her grandpa’s pick — and around Central Park, stopping at one of the many pretzel carts for a snack. They dropped them off at the hotel, Cass’ eyes getting misty as her grandma pulled out the serape stole from her purse. Her fingers danced over the colors, the stripes of red and blue and pink and green, and knowing that it was made by the hands of someone so important to her made it all the more beautiful. The rest of her family was driving in later that night, after Nick got out of school, so everyone wouldn’t be together until the graduation ceremony the next day. 

The couple decided to get takeout on the way back to Mat’s apartment, Mat jumping out of the car to run in and pick up the order while Cass circled the block until he was out. As they sat on the couch, cuddled into each other as they broke into the boxes of Chinese food, Cass thought absentmindedly that Mat handled his chopsticks way better than she ever would have given him credit for. Her grandparents had been on her mind. More specifically, her grandparents and Mat had been on her mind. It wasn’t that she thought he had messed up in any way — she was positive he’d absolutely won over her grandma and her grandpa was slowly but surely coming around — but some lingering concerns about what they might think about their relationship. “I’m not sure that they’d actually care, but when you talk to them tomorrow maybe don’t mention how often I sleep over here? They’re wonderful people, but they’re a little old school about this stuff.” 

“This stuff?” Mat asked curiously. 

“Living together, sex before marriage, that kind of stuff.” 

“And how do you feel about it?” 

Cass raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you think you could ever get me to do something I didn’t want to do? I’m way too stubborn for that.” Mat threw his head back, laughing. “But seriously. I don’t make the decision lightly, because commitment and intimacy in that way is something really big and important to me. You already knew that I don’t do hookups, it’s just not my thing. But I can see this, us, going places. I want us to go places. And I’ve never been very good at listening to people when I don’t want to. So I’ve made my peace that my choices might not be ones everyone would be thrilled with, but it doesn’t really matter to me as long as I have you.” 

Mat nodded, putting down his food to card one hand through her curls. “I get that, I do. Obviously that’s not so much the attitude with a lot of the boys, but your principles are part of what makes you who you are, and I love who you are. Every part of you.” Cass smiled against his neck, leaning down and kissing him on the shoulder. “I want us to go places too, I hope you know that.”

“Glad to hear.”

They ate without speaking for a few more minutes until Mat broke the silence. “Where do you see yourself in five years?” 

“With you,” Cass answered honestly. “Here, or we could get a nice brownstone over in Brooklyn.” 

“Somewhere with a yard,” Mat mused. 

“Yeah, a yard would be nice,” Cass agreed. “I’d like to get a dog, I’ve always grown up with dogs and it would be nice to have someone to keep me company when you’re gone.” Her family’s two dogs, Patches and Scout, were back at the house in Connecticut, and on more than one occasion, Cass had made the two-hour drive up just to see them. She paused, glancing down at her hands. “In five years? You’d better have put a ring on my finger by then, Mat. I’ll be almost thirty. Approaching old maid status” 

Mat laughed, an easy, breathy sort of laugh that somehow erased all of the tension in the room. “I think you should double-hyphen.” 

Cass looked at him doubtfully. “Cabrera-Shaw-Barzal? Yeah, I’m going to have to pass on that one.” 

He shrugged, the corner of his lip pulled up in a half-smile. “Just saying. It’s got a ring to it.”

“Have you given much thought to what you’d want to do with your name when you get married?” Mat asked curiously. It really didn’t matter much to him, since it would ultimately be Cass’ decision, but he didn’t want to assume anything regardless. And it didn’t escape Cass that he said when, as if it was certain, as if it was a given. The surety made her heart flutter. 

Cass shook her head. “Not particularly. On one hand, I do like the idea of the whole family having the same name. It seems nice. Unified. But I don’t want to feel like I’m erasing my culture and who I am just because I’m getting married. And all due respect, chou,” Cass poked Mat’s cheek, “but Cabrera Shaw’s the name on my degrees. Cassidy Barzal didn’t go to law school.”

“Very fair,” Mat said with a chuckle. 

Cass took a deep breath. If it seemed like they were having the “future talk,” she figured it was best to go all in. “Do you want kids?” she asked, tentatively, hesitantly. It was obvious that Mat was good with kids, she’d seen as much, but being good with kids and wanting children of your own were two very different things. Cass had wanted to be a mom since she knew what a mom was, and even though they probably should have brought up the topic earlier, she wasn’t sure what she’d do if he said no. Thank God, she never had to find out. 

“Definitely,” Mat said, nodding. “Not now, obviously, we’re young and haven’t really settled down yet. If you got pregnant we’d make it work, but I don’t think either of us is looking to be parents right away. But in a couple years, once we’re married and have a proper house with space...Yeah, I’d like to have kids.” He looked over at Cass. “What about you?”

“Always wanted kids,” Cass responded fondly. “I loved growing up with siblings, and I know my parents were the same way. Two or three, I think. I’ve thought about adoption too, but obviously that’s way in the future.”

Mat kissed the top of her head. “We’ve got time.”

 May 22 (sat)

 The graduation ceremony itself wasn’t until noon, so Cass had more than enough time to get ready after waking up at 7. Alicia barrelled into her room at exactly 7:22, throwing a shirt at her and telling her to get dressed. Cass stumbled out of the room ten minutes later, pulling on socks and grabbing her phone from the charger by her door. “What are you guys trying to pull?” she asked, yawning and trying to wipe the sleep out of her eyes. 

“Uh, we’re going to the diner, duh,” Stella said with a smile, tossing Cass her purse. “Come on! You know it fills up early on weekends.” Glen’s Diner had become an apartment staple over the past few years, the restaurant having been the first place the four of them had eaten in the city when they moved, not having bought groceries yet and not wanting to pay the premium for delivery. It was cheap, open 24/7, and Cass would swear up and down that their blueberry pancakes were the best she’d ever had. 

They were seated just after 8, happily slurping coffee and stealing bites of each other’s breakfast twenty minutes later. It was a nice day and hadn’t gotten too hot yet, so they decided to walk back after finishing the meal. In reality, “going back” meant Alicia stopping to buy a new necklace, listening to a busker for a few minutes, and petting no fewer than five dogs on the one-mile walk. There was still plenty of time before they had to leave for the ceremony, but after Cass did her makeup and tamed her curls, there was just enough time to watch an episode of Parks & Rec before having to actually get her stuff together. Not as flexible as she once had been, Ryanne helped zip up the back of her dress, a white lace bodycon from her sorority days that she had definitely worn to at least two semiformals. Hey, Cass thought as she straightened her hemline, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. 

She had ironed her robe and put it into a dress bag the night before, and gently folded her school stole and the serape from her abuela into her purse. Mat’s necklace hadn’t left its place since Valentine’s. Her dad’s parents had given her a beautiful pair of pearl studs for her undergraduate graduation, and it felt only right to wear them for her next step. She fastened the ankle straps on her heels, and popped her head out to the living room. “Everyone ready?” She was met with a chorus of “yeses,” and grabbed her keys from their dish by the front door. 

“Let’s go get our girl graduated!” Alicia hollered into the street. 

The girls had originally objected to Cass driving herself to her own graduation, but relented as soon as Cass reminded them that she was the only one who knew where to find the free parking, and the rest of them only drove sedans. “Cheryl has way more room. Y’all want to be cramped on purpose?” 

“Fair point,” Stella had said begrudgingly. 

Exactly twenty-six minutes later, Cass pulled into a spot about two blocks away from the arena where she would be graduating in an hour’s time, hugging each of her friends as Ryanne handed her the dress bag. “You’re going to kill it in there,” she said, rubbing her back. 

Cass laughed. “Ry, all I’ve got to do is walk across a stage without tripping.”

She shrugged. “It’s a fine art that few have mastered.” 

Cass entered through the side, flashing her ID to the security guard standing by the door. Half an hour later, everyone had been ushered into their seats, carefully arranged in alphabetical order. For the most part, Cass was friendly with everyone in her class; if they weren’t outwardly hostile to her, she saw no reason why they deserved anything other than kindness, but was relieved to see Robin sitting next to her. “You excited?” Robin asked, brushing a piece of her auburn hair behind her ear. The lobby doors must have opened, because as she asked, crowds started to mill into the seats, waving at anyone who would catch their eye. 

Cass bounced her head. “I am, but it’s kind of surreal, you know? I knew we’d get to this point, obviously. It’s what we’ve been working towards for seven years, really. But the idea that it all essentially comes down to this…”

“An hour, a few handshakes, and a piece of paper,” Robin helpfully supplied. 

She nodded. “Yeah. It’s almost anticlimactic in a way? Like sure, we’ve got our JDs after this, but knowing we’ve still got to pass the bar. We’re not over the finish line yet.”

“Columbia has a 97% pass rate, and you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, Cass. And I’ve spent three years surrounded by the smartest people I’ve ever met.”

“Fair,” Cass said, “it’s just kind of a weird feeling, you know?” Robin nodded. “And plus, for most of us, we’ve pretty much spent our whole lives in school. Aside from positions as summer associates, or part-time jobs and internships, we don’t really know how to do anything other than school. It’s just a little bit of a daunting thought to suddenly feel like we’re being thrown out to the wolves without really knowing what to expect.” Cass’ phone, which she wasn’t technically supposed to have but had snuck in anyways, chose that moment to buzz with a text notification. It was from Mat.

Met up with the crew! Can’t wait to see you walk across that stage, Cass. I love you and we’re all so proud of you. Mat had attached a photo of everyone she had brought with her — both sets of grandparents, her parents and siblings, and roommates. 

“Your boyfriend is nauseatingly cute,” Robin observed, looking over her shoulder at the message. 

Cass laughed. “That’s true, but I knew what I was getting myself into.” The music started ten minutes later, and the ceremony began. If Cass was being honest, she didn’t really remember much of anything from the first half of the ceremony, before the conferral of diplomas. She was so excited and nervous and unbelievably ready all at the same time that all she recalled from the dean’s speech and the student speeches were vague comments about their “awesome responsibility” and “duty to pursue truth and justice” and “commitment to fight for what is right over what is easy.” 

As soon as she realized it, her row was being ushered into line to receive their diplomas. “Cassidy María Cabrera Shaw.” She heard her name, but really had no clue who had spoken it. The dean? One of her professors? As Cass walked up the steps and across the stage, the only thing she could think was don’t trip don’t trip don’t trip. Then she was handed a diploma, flashed a brilliant smile for the photographer, and shook hand after hand after hand before walking off the other side of the stage. She was pretty sure she could hear Mat and Noah yelling their congratulations from her seat on the floor. 

Having a name towards the front of the alphabet meant that Cass was almost always called on quickly in class, or on roll call, or at graduation, as the case was. But that meant that she had to sit, quietly and politely, for the other four hundred names to be called. And it took awhile. After Robin Cahill came Wesley Coleman, then Samuel Cogswell, then Fiona Chan. Cass didn’t mind having to sit through the whole thing, especially when Fiona, Les, Samaira, and her other friends crossed the stage — she cheered as much as anybody — but it was a long time to be sitting in a folding chair and the thousands of people packed into a small space didn’t help her temperature regulation. 

There was the benediction and congratulations, and then the recessional of the graduates. Graduates, Cass thought. She was a graduate. She had finished, she was done, she had accomplished the one thing she wanted most to do since she was a little girl watching Legally Blonde for the first time, looking at Elle Woods and thinking I can do that. And she had. Her feet carried her to the back room of their own accord, where she picked up her bag and was engulfed in a flurry of hugs, congratulations, and kisses on the cheek from her friends, the people who she had spent countless late nights in the library with, bar hopping to celebrate the end of finals, and afternoons on each other’s apartment couches, yelling fact patterns at each other and trying to come up with an analysis before the timer went off.  

Following the stream of sky blue graduation gowns, Cass walked outside, waving at her family when she spotted Eliana hanging off of a lamppost in the courtyard to get a better view. Her sister nearly tackled her as she made her way to the group. “Cass. I already knew you were brilliant, and I still think  you’re the smartest out of any of us,” she gestured between the two of them and Noah, “but now you’ve got the degree to prove it. I’m so proud of you.” 

Noah was next. “You worked hard, and I know how badly you wanted this. You’re a really good sister.” He wasn’t usually a big talker, and Cass’ eyes definitely got a little misty as he spoke. He had verbally committed to Minnesota State the week before, and Mat might have been more excited than even Cass when he heard the news. It was an incredible program that had a serious track record of sending players to the NHL, and she was so proud to see her little brother doing what he loved. Her mom and both grandmas were crying, as expected, and Grandpa Joe wrapped her up in a hug as soon as he got the chance. 

Mat had been hanging towards the back of the crowd, not wanting to feel like he was intruding on family time, until her dad nudged him forward. “Go say hi to your girl, Mat,” Patrick said.

“Will do,” Mat said, squeezing Cass’ hand and pressing a quick kiss to the top of her head. “Sometimes it blows my mind how incredible you are,” he said. “Everyone’s already said how smart you are, and every bit of that is true. But you’re so much more than that, you know?” His thumb rubbed over her hand. “You’re beautiful, and curious, and you always keep me on my toes. You’re so passionate about your work, and you’ve got the biggest heart out of anyone I know. You’ve never met a person you didn’t want to help. And I promise I’m not biased just because I’m in love with you.” 

Cass gave a watery laugh, blinking and thanking God she had the foresight to wear waterproof mascara. “God, I love you, Mat.”

Her dad had always been the picture type, insisting on documenting every waking moment. He was the living embodiment of “pics or it didn’t happen,” for better or worse. He took a few of her with her law school friends, then Alicia snapped one with just her immediate family, then there was one with everyone. Cass also got a picture with Mat, where he was bending down to kiss her, the tassel on her mortarboard just barely brushing his nose. Then she was in one with all of the seniors on the law review, and a friend pulled her away for a few with the Latinx Student Association. By the time they finally managed to tear Patrick away from his camera, it was time to head back to the hotel and get ready for dinner. 

Mat got Patrick to send him the photo of him and Cass, and was about to post it on Instagram when he hesitated. “Hey, is it cool if I post this?” Mat said, showing Cass his phone. Most people knew who she was, and he had posted pictures of her before, but they had never been this obvious, this clear, this real. 

“Go for it.”

Mat pressed post. So, so proud of my incredible girlfriend @casscshaw for graduating law school. You’re one of the smartest, most empathetic people I know, and you’re going to make an amazing lawyer. 

Cass grinned, a big, genuine smile as she was surrounded by her family, the people who meant the most to her — whether they were related or not. She looked up at Mat, who was smiling softly down at her as he reached one hand up to fix her tassel. “What’s next?”

[five-nights-of-protagonists]

Another dark memory reaction for Micheal and some of the adults, if he was angry from the last one, this one will make him go over drive to kill <:3 bonus sketch art at the end

“I have them all papá.. all the circus crew , even the smaller ones and funtime chica…” Elizabeth said sadly hearing the crew yell pleads at Elizabeth to let them go and she’s making a huge mistake of obeying shadow. It hurt her hearing her cries, hearing them cry and be afraid and every instinct told her to free them and comfort them and apologize to them… but her loyalty for shadow prevented her to do so, and she seriously started to think of this was even worth it, he promised her a happy family but this wasn’t happiness… it was sadness and misery. “Good good then we have Everything we need for this little experiment “ “what?…. What do you mean experiment?” Elizabeth questioned worriedly, this wasn’t part of what shadow told her. “You see, I asked you to get them here for a simple reason… we are losing the battle with you deranged family and we need more…. Harsher methods to deal with them” shadow bluntly said and Elizabeth was thinking of what he meant until a dark thought came to mind.

No… out of everything, she Promised she would never do that again…. She promised to never form ennard.. that cursed project did nothing but pain, no matter if it freed the circus, it was so painful, it wasn’t worth it, but he couldn’t possibly be referring to that… could he?. “You don’t mean…”

“Yes …. I am talking about the ennard project” that Shattered Elizabeth. He was gonna force the crew to fuse , she promised baby to never do the project before baby got destroyed. He couldn’t do this, she told him. “We can’t! I told you that the project is painful, not only that but unstable! We can’t do that! “ “ph dear Elizabeth im not requesting permission to make it… im demanding you to do it” shadow growled “we can find another way just not this! Plus we don’t have a vessel to hold them together anyways! Without one ennard will collapse!” Elizabeth desperately said to make shadow change his mind. “…. You are right…. We are missing the key ingredient… “ shadow slowly said before smiling looking Elizabeth in an odd way that just tells .. he is planning something “good, now we can find another way to beat them, I suggest we- AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!�� Elizabeth screamed out in agony as shadow send a harsh high volt of electric magic at Elizabeth knocking her out on the floor. “We are missing you Elizabeth… you are the secret ingredient….. for the improved ennard… I’m so sorry dear … but it’s for the best…. You’ll love it in the end” shadow grinned picking the unconscious Elizabeth up and taking her back to the room we’re the horrified crew looked seeing Elizabeth in this state before cursing damnations at him, even the little ones lost their composure and screamed for shadows blood to spill at what shadow did to Elizabeth. The only one who didn’t was baby who remained motionless and had a blank stare like a normal robot would before a small tear shed showing the few sparks of the original baby. “Oh stop your wining…. Leave it for our little project, say hello to you old friend “ shadow says as he pulls a lever and a huge improvised scooper came down frightening the crew. They had never dreamed of seeing the machine and it bigger than the original one… they desperately try to find a way out their enclosures but it was in vain as shadow grabbed baby pulling her infront of the scooper who backed away but shadow smacked her so hard the faceplates broke. “Oh don’t be like that little baby, I’ll destroy your crews hopes and dreams of ever being happy… starting with who made them have hope… you” baby remained motionless as she was forced to her knees to stay which she did after shadow left and activated the machine. She didn’t budge and inch but her eyes told a different story… a story of the absolute fear and despair, something in the cold wires begging to move and free herself from the control that kept her to her knees…. It was too late as the machine jerk fowards towards baby as she let out one small scream before everything went black.

“Where is she?!?!? WHERE DO YOU HAVE MY DAUGHTER YOU BASTARD!!!!!!!!” Vincent screamed out wildly destroying another shadow creature from the hundreds of dead shadow clones infront of him. He grew so tired of this, he needs to find his daughter, he flipped the entire d facility from inside out and the flames grew brighter around him. This demon laughed at his fury, “ oh why should I tell you? You did bring her towards me, and abandoned her without a second thought of yours or the promise you made your wife… you like How i made your spouse?” Shadow grinned histéric at Vincent’s anger growing. “You made my wife into a shadow creature!!!!! YOU LIED TO ME ALL ALONG!!!! “ “i did no such thing! You wished for her to return, you wish for her to be by your side as a happy family. I made my side of the deal true , I never promised I wouldn’t do such things” “I’ll help her heal from your corruption… where is Elizabeth?! ANSWER ME!!!!!! GIVE HER BACK TO ME!!!!!! “Vincent charged at shadow slamming him against the metal wall and breaking through it, both falling to a plataform in a much bigger room both dazed at impact but shadow laughed and cough. “You want her that desperately? Fine…. Oh Elizabeth~~~ daddy want to play… show him how much you missed him!” A loud beholding screech was heard rumblings through the walls and a huge figure crashed in between both of them. Shadow laughed as Vincent looked up horrified seeing this creature up close. “Elizabeth?……. No…. It can’t be…. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HER?!?? TO THEM?! “Vincent backed away from the creature with tears in his eyes horrified beyond belief. “I made some improvements using the robot family she loved so dearly…. Come on now Vincent, you wanted her and now you have her…. Give him a big hug Elizabeth” shadow grinned demented as the 15 foot tall creature made of wires, flesh and it’s potent dark energy flowing through every part of it. But the worse part is, Vincent could hear the screams of agony coming from the inside, he could hear everyone… the circus…. Elizabeth… all yelling out for anything and anyone to help them… save them…

Charlie, Clara, and even Henry tried to hold back Michael and William, but, it was too late. Even Cassidy agreed it was too late. She would open up purgatory for them, and help them hunt down that demon. The absolute rage and blood lust coming from Michael was new. Scary. Even William was feeling a little fear from his son, how, like his father, had the ability to make his victims not only see their greatest fear, but experience them as well. When Michael spoke, the voice box in his endoskeleton was distorted, like Ennard was back and speaking like a demented clown. "Oh, Shadow~ I've come to play~" He called out as he and William entered Purgatory. "Time to teach you why you should have never messed with us~!"

[lady-daydream]

Fallout New Vegas Companions Reactions/Thoughts on Classical Music

As requested this ones for you @winged-light-collectors-posts , I'm sorry it took so long, I hope this is okay, the reacts aren't as long as I would have liked however I found that got stumped by a few of the characters. If I missed anyone please let me know. And also you seem like a lovely person and your love of classical music was really refreshing :)

Once again I apologise for spelling error, I am horrible at spell checking. If anyone has any imaginations or reactions from fallout 3-4 or new Vegas just comment or send a request. Hope you all enjoy and have an amazing day -Love you all <3

Btw if anyone cares I listened to Tchaikovsky 1812 overture with cannons, Clair De lune Ethereal remix, and chop in Ballade No.4 in F minor ethereal remix while writing 

Arcade: It wasn't the first time he had heard Classical music, due to some of the enclave radios having classical music paired to their broadcasts. Surprisingly, despite the memory of the music being attached to his past he enjoys it. Even commenting to you once or twice when he would recall his mum listening to certain songs when she was alive. He also preferred the soothing factor to classical which he found made it easier to focus compared to some of the limited other choices available. So whenever you both are resting or are setting up camp the both of you may be found relax doing your respected activities such as repairing weapons and reading while Tchaikovsky or Rachmaninov plays in the background.

Boone: He didn't have a strong opinion on what music the courier listened to while traveling with him. While serving he learnt that music of all different genres helped soldiers relax, or reminded them of happier times or just of home. Though he did wander from time to time what the genre of music said about a person.However he normally didn't think too hard about it or just didn't want to go down that rabbit hole of a thought process. Through travelling with you over time he slowly learnt to warm up to some songs, with calmer songs such as those by Chopin being his favourites though he would never tell you. And on rare occasions when you both are travelling and he can see the night sky, the classical music helps him relax enough to close his eyes even for a moment without his own ghosts haunting him.

Cassidy: Similar to Boone, she was indifferent to classical music. Though every so often while travelling with you she may comment  that it reminded her of a few mornings she had woken up in bars across the wasteland, with a hangover stronger than an radscorpions sting. She did find it annoying whenever the courier seemed to stop and become engrossed in the music, moaning how they were burning daylight. However when the both of you are drunk, the both of you may try and make lyrics to classical tunes, curses and dirty lyrics included until the both of you are rolling on the floor laughing on the ground like idiots or somehow turn certain sounds in the songs into drinking games.

Ed-e: The both of you enjoy classical music, the robot bopping along with the courier whistling along side. It always made you smile when you would hear happy beeping noises whenever a certain song would comes on the radio. After travelling for a while, Ed-e starts to play certain tunes himself, some of which he must have recorded while Whitley was in the room, as sometimes a person humming or a small mutter or comment can be heard. You knew how important Whitley was, almost like a father to Ed-e as after a while the mans comments blend into the music itself . However you wandered if Ed-e recorded the two of you listening to music similar to Whitley as sometimes while stopping to set up camp for the night Ed-e seems oddly quiet while the two off you listen to your pip-boy. However even if he was recording you didn't mind, you were more happy that Ed-e saw you as important enough to him to want to remember your times together.

Follows-Chalk: Neither of you had really listened to classical before meeting, and Follows-Chalk hadn't heard it at all. However while searching for a certain radio station while travelling with him you stumbled across the classical music station. Follows-chalk instantly loves it. Whistling some of the tunes he had heard while you travel together. Sometimes commenting on the differences between the music he had heard from the travelling singer when he was younger as well as some of the songs his tribe would sing. He would sometimes even teach you some in return for playing some classical music. He always has questions about the artists and their meanings, which you would often reply that it was up to him and how the music made him feel. And so sometimes when the both of you are travelling you may share what the music makes you both feel and think of, helping you both understand each other better.

Joshua: Listening to it was a kick from the past, as memories of listening to it while he was living in New Canaan with his family long before Caesar come flooding back the first time he heard or listening to it. He tried to enjoy the music as much as possible,trying to hold on to the more positive memories of his family- of his father and mother listening to it while doing other activities, memories childhood friends and the misadventures of kids all while having classical music in the background as they all got up to mischief. These memories did leave a smile that hurt as it pulled at burnt calloused skin. However through listening he was also reminded of the absences.The new Cannans destruction, of his family's and friend death. How his love of the music had dissolved as he got closer to Caesar and further away from his childhood and home. You notice he gets slightly quieter when you play the music and If you ask him if he is okay he will comment on these memories, not going into too much detail unless questioned further, respecting your one associations of the music don't need to be shared with his. After travelling a while, slowly he would try and dissociate the music with his memories replacing them with more positive moments while travelling you or just letting the sound of the music flow through him. On very rare occasion he might even ask you if he may offer to dance, commenting that he learnt from a few dances and events the town had in his youth. Mostly however, he is just glad he was able to listen to the music with you, using the calming music to just focus on the two of you and the peace the music brought him.

The King: On first listening he didn't like it. He didn't mind you listening to it if he saw it made you happy; however, he would always recommend songs from ‘the king” on holotapes he had. Both of you at first choose to respect each other's opinions. After a while though both of you made a deal. For every song he listened to of your preferred genre of music, you would listen to one he wanted you to listen to. So it became a routine. Whenever he knew you had a long journey he would slip you holotapes with songs such as ‘suspicious minds’ and ‘stuck on you’ and in return when alone The king would listen to the radio station you recommended. After a while you both soften up to each others music and as the both of you got closer you both associate certain lyrics and songs to each other, with the songs ‘Can't Help Falling In Love’ and ‘Rachmaninov’s Piano Concerto No.2′ holding a special place in both of your hearts. When things get more serious, he might even sing small medley of songs from either genres that you stated you like more, and would even nickname you his ‘symphony’ or his “song bird” if you try to sing any of the songs he likes. 

Raul: When you listened to classical music with him for the first time he laughed, sarcastically commenting on “isn't this music a little too old for you, boss?” or “Mi abuela would have loved you”. Plus if you enjoyed the music he didn't really mind. If the radio station had different regional classical music, Raul would happily translate any lyrics if need be if he recognised it, commenting of different memories of his family if the both of you were comfortable enough sharing.Unlike other companions he was able to educate you on some of the instruments used and just the basic knowledge he would have known before the bombs fell. Once or twice though if you are both relaxed (and if you have had a few to drink) you might ask him to dance to some of the more energetic classical songs. And though he will resort to comments about his knees can't handle dancing, and how “you are a few 100 years too late to be asking him to dance”. He still will dance anyway laughing at the joy you brought with you - as well as both of your dancing ability.

Veronica: ’”Didn't think classical music was your thing, but hey to each their own I guess- was told it helps focus, but idk.If I had someone playing a violin next to me I'm pretty sure I would have a difficult time focusing”. She had listened to music before meeting you, however much preferred learning pre-war information from long forgotten technology more than listening to it. As such whenever you are both listening she would randomly tell you small random facts about composers such as “.hey, did you know Edvard Grieg had a good-luck figurine. It was a little frog that he would pat before a concert- found that out on an old library achieve. wonder why he thought the frog was so lucky. - hey maybe I'm your lucky charm y/n”. However she wonders why classical music was associated with intelligence at the time since, anyone can listen to the music, so what made it so intellectual, or was it just that the skill it takes to play an instrument made it associated with knowledge.

Ulysses:He collects all pre-war music he can. He enjoys listening to just his surrounding and the silence that would sometimes bring. He also enjoys focusing on music and was surprised by how many classical music recordings he found while travelling. He enjoyed what each song means by its self but also how the music and the meaning behind it still remained even years after their creators and original audiences had died. He did sometimes wonder what message the listeners were supposed to take away however he knows that answer is one of many lost by time. At first he is rather hesitant about even bringing up the subject, due to you're association of destroying the traces of the old world, However through gaining his trust he slowly opens up about it and will let you sit and listen with him.He will sometimes ask you what you think the meaning is or what you think of the song and sometimes comment that he wonder if the creators would imagine someone like him listening to their music, a lone man sitting one the edge of a cliff, watching over the past while protecting the present from the threats of tunnelers and marked men or the significance their music would have on a person. When you join him, you normal listen in silence broken by occasional discussion. Allowing you both you be in your own thought. However even if it is just your presence next to him or you holding his hand or sometimes falling asleep resting against him, he is glad he isn't completely alone and that you understand, even if it is just a little bit, the importance the music is to him.

[snarkwriteswrasslin]

w.i.p list

┌ I’m not gonna lie. I am.. a very slow person to get things done. Given that this seems to be the case, I thought I would throw this up here so you guys know I got your requests and have drafted them to my drafts. 

This also helps you guys so that you know what letters are in the process of being done / what’s left to send. As I finish something on here I’ll take it off  Iguess? Idk. I mainly just posted this so you guys could see it and know how horrible I am at keeping up with shit.

If you don’t see yours on here, i didn’t get it or I don’t write for the person you asked about and I’m very sorry if that’s the case... Feel free to re-send, even though I warn you my drafts are... hella full. No, that is not a complaint at all. I enjoy that? It’s been nice so by all means, if you don’t mind the wait (I do these in order of how inspiration hits me on particular days fyi and some characters are harder for me than others) go ahead and send me things, I don’t mind at all!! .

 I’m finally getting inspiration to write my own things lately, so whenever that comes I definitely don’t ignore it because it’s been so long since I have.. Anyway, you know the drill. It’ll take a while, but. whatever you send to my ask, if I write for the person you ask for,  will be done.  I’m sorry, I’m horrible, I really am. I acknowledge this. Thank you guys for being so patient with me, I love you all so much.

Any items that are in italics are currently sitting in the queue I’ve set up. Reminder... Read my about before sending in an ask.┘

NSFW ALPHABET

adam cole d o y | 

baron corbin - l m u

cash wheeler -  [ i l s ] | [ m o r ] | c s u |

chuck taylor -  [ c  v ] | i k w |

drew mcintyre - a b c | 

eddie kingston -  | b k m | d i |

jay white - d f k | a c e | g h i

jeff hardy - a b c | 

jon moxley -  | c d w |

jungle boy - b w y | 

kyle o’reilly - d o y | 

matt jackson - u y | 

orange cassidy - o | k w

pac - dmx | fos

ricky starks - b e k | i | 

sami callihan - i c u | 

santana - aoq | 

tommaso ciampa - f j m | 

trent beretta - d i k | 

tyler breeze - l x y | d j u

xavier woods - e j w

wardlow -  k u ] | [ b m r | c i p

Headcanons;

adam hangman page nsfw / soft mix

chuck taylor enemies to lovers

eddie kingston nsfw headcanons

jungle boy nsfw headcanons | soft friend headcanons

orange cassidy nsfw headcanons | 

timothy thatcher anything I choose (probably soft/mature idk)

Drabbles;  

( these might take longer tbh. i just haven’t been having any luck with them)

Vampire Landlord

part 2 of a Roman thing from back in october, yiiikes. i am... horrible.

Sacrificed to a demon 

Stuff I’m doing for myself; 

timothy thatcher pick up line one shot ( nearly finished )

sequel to the MJF pickup line  one shot thirsty, (nearly finished)

+ a few other ideas I have on the table that I lowkey wanna do.. The thatch one is just the most complete and therefore the most pressing matter currently.

[wallofweird]

1. Kevison Analysis: Season 4 Episode 18

I’ve decided to write a series of analysis regarding Madison, Kevin, his ‘relationships’ with her, Sophie and Cassidy respectively. I don’t have a specific schedule for them, I’ll release each post whenever I have enough free time and energy to write it because I want to give all of you something really through, like I did with my masterpost about Justin’s and TPTB’s interviews that hinted at Kevison becoming canon. 

I also want to remind everyone that some of the stuff I say here is already established as canon, but some is my interpretation of the events that happened on the episode. 

That being said, I want to begin by talking about Madison’s first scene. We learn that Madison is pregnant with Kevin’s child (children) and this is her third medical appointment alone. Her OB/GYN, Dr. Eli Mason, asks Madison if there is anyone she could bring along for support.

Madison explains she hasn’t told anyone because she is not close with her family. Madison also shares that confessing her pregnancy to the one good friend she has is not a possibility. Then, Dr. Mason brings up the father of the babies. 

She says:

“We barely know each other. Actually, the only thing I definitively know about him is that he comes from a long line of great love stories... And this... This would not be what he wants... There is no way... There is no way he'd want this.”

Dr. Mason replies:

“Little early to give up on him. Huh? You haven’t even given him the chance to be himself yet.”

I absolutely love this piece of advice and find the words the writers chose for this scene really interesting. He could’ve said something like “you’ll never really know unless you talk to him” or “look, I get it, but shouldn’t you make an effort and tell him? You’re already discarding your kids’ father from their lives without even trying. Give it one attempt, do it for your children.”

Instead, he suggests she gives him the chance to be the person he already is. This advice sums up the way basically the world perceives Madison and Kevin, even a little bit of how they see each other. Everyone has this pre-fabricated idea of them as people who have it all together and don’t have actual problems. Or of individuals that are immature, shallow, clingy and are always seeking attention. They are rarely taken seriously, their cheerful nature annoys almost everyone around them and they are usually not seen as people capable of being responsible or deep. Also, most of their issues only get recognition and attention when both reach their lowest point. So, Dr. Mason’s words describes them flawlessly, the way people treat them and also the ideas they have of one another: Kevin has underestimated Madison before and she doesn’t believe he would want to be part of the his children’s lives.  

Madison gives him a shy smile

and ultimately decides to follow the doctor’s advice.

Meanwhile, at Kate’s house, Kevin and Randall are arguing over the fact his brother convinced their mother to undergo a clinical trial even though she had previously ruled it out.

Things are escalating pretty quickly and it almost gets physical.

And that’s exactly when Madison shows up. She greets them and apologizes for being late for the party.

Kevin’ explains that it isn’t a good time. That might have come off as rude for some people, but I don’t see it that way. Randall and him were fighting, he was stressed, the atmosphere of the place couldn’t be worse. However, he doesn’t yell at her or looks at Madison with an angry expression, Kevin simply looks tired and overwhelmed, which he is.

She walks in anyway.

“What’s going on? Where is everyone?” Madison asks.

Nevertheless, Kevin lets her in without protesting and he closes the door without slamming it. Kevin simply explains that was what he meant: It wasn’t a good time, there was nobody there and he was in the midst of a feud with his brother (which Madison got to witness a little bit). In fact, I believe there is some kind of intimacy here, in a way that he is rawly honest with her. He was just being trying to say the atmosphere of the place wasn’t festive anymore.

“Kevin, we need to talk and we need to it now before I lose my nerve,” she announces.

“(Exhales) Look. (Exhales) Just, I'm... I'm not sure what we need to talk about, honestly, okay? Uh, look, you were lonely, I get that. I was, uh, heartbroken. And I don't know why we have to relitigate the whole stupid thing. I just... You know, we made a mistake...”

Again, I don’t interpret this moment as Kevin being rude to her. He was having a terrible day and he was arguing with his brother just a few minutes ago. Not to mention that despite having a better approach to the situation, Kevin is still affected by his mother’s diagnosis and worries about her health. The last couple of months weren’t easy for him and that day was only making matters worse. 

Besides, Madison herself has expressed regret for sleeping with Kevin and classified their hookup as something stupid too. She even admitted that she was feeling embarrassed by it.

Kevin was disturbed, he wasn’t thinking clearly. If the situation had been different, I’d say he would’ve figured out the reason she was there right away. It had been nearly two months that they had seen one another and apparently they hadn’t spoken ever since. She had a serious look on her face, not a flirtatious one. He would’ve connected the dots. Still, Kevin was overwhelmed, so he wrongly assumed Madison was there just to add to his stress by making a move on him, which would’ve been the last thing he needed at the moment. When people are having a bad day, they tend to think the world is out there to get them. That’s what happened here. Yet, Kevin didn’t raise his voice, expressed anger or anything, he overall just wanted to avoid talking to people, IT WASN’T anything PERSONAL.

On the other hand, Madison doesn’t back down and spills that she’s pregnant.

She continues,

“You’re the father...

It’s the question I would ask,

and...

You are.

I’m sorry,” she murmurs.

Madison adds, 

“I know I am a complete stranger to you.

I am just your sister’s friend and...  

I honestly know nothing about you other than how much you love your high school girlfriend.

(pauses)

I’ve decided I’m gonna go through with this.”

Kevin is too paralyzed to say anything yet,

but he nods, giving a slight indication that he is supportive of her decision.

“You don’t know my medical history, but this is kind of a miracle for me. 

But I need you to know I will not ask anything of you.

Emotionally, financially, all of it. 

You can still find the great love story you deserve,” she reassures him.

I absolutely love this part, because Madison is afraid she and the kids could get in the way of Kevin’s dream life, and I doubt it is because she has feelings for him, I believe it might have something to do with her family. Like, maybe they resent her because they’ve never wanted children and she is projecting that idea onto him.

However, you can see Kevin closing his eyes, wrinkling his forehead and shaking his head. As he listens, Kevin seems to be offended, even hurt by the fact Madison would think so little of him and, I dare to say, herself.

His reactions suggest that he finds what she is saying to be a complete absurd.

And he just can’t take any more of it. “Madison,” he interrupts her.

And Caitlin’s performance here is so on wonderful, because Madison is so nervous that she barely has it together. She gasps and almost skips a heartbeat. She seems to be on the verge of losing it.

Nevertheless, Kevin is still unable to say anything. “I think I might pass out,” he admits. “I'm just... I'm gonna...” he rambles as he is about to walk out the room, but Kevin doesn’t feel good about leaving her like that and you can conflict on his face.

“I'm not walking away from this conversation, okay? I just... I need a minute to... I'm sorry. Just... One second,” he explains to her.

I’m very fond of this moment as well, because Kevin has a lot in his mind, not only the pregnancy, but Rebecca’s health condition, the argument with Randall... He needs a few minutes to process what’s just happened. It’s a great example of Kevin emotional intelligence, he knows he needs a moment to assimilate everything because he wants to be as focused and serene as possible when they get back to their conversation and he needs to take a breath for that, but it’s still important to him to reassure Madison that he will definitely come back. He’s basically saying, “look, I’m sorry I’m not in my best state right now. I’m having this horrible day and I need a second because I want to clear my mind before I talk to you, but I promise I’m not going anywhere.”

Madison doesn’t protest

and Kevin guarantees it won’t take long and apologizes one last time with his eyes.

Kevin steps outside and takes a deep breath.

His brother interrupts it.

“Randall, please, I can’t do this right now,” Kevin raises his hand and begs, because he is trying to focus on returning to his conversation with Madison. 

Randall doesn’t listen and restarts their fight.

Kevin throws back, but changes his mind and decides to enter the house. 

His brother keeps pushing and he ends up coming back.

“You want to do this now, finally, after all these years? Let's do it! You know, this whole narrative that you keep spinning, this narrative that you took care of the family, where the hell did that come from? Huh? 'Cause all I know is, if I had been there, I would've walked through literal fire, and I would've pulled that man out,” Kevin shouts.

Randall adds fuel to the fire, “Well, Kev, I guess we'll never know, because you weren't there. And he died ashamed of you.”

He rubs some of his brother’s deepest wounds, “And I think... I think that's the part that really gets you, isn't it? The shame that he felt for you and the pride that he felt for me? I mean, you're not even chasing dad's shadow, Kevin, you're chasing mine. But you'll never be him and you'll never be me, because you'll never know what it's like to devote yourself to anyone other than yourself. And you'll pretend, but it'll all just be a performance. A tired, stale performance. Like all of your performances.”

And Kevin decides to get back at Randall, “You know, I used to think the worst thing that happened to me was the day that dad died. It's the day they brought you home. Hand to God, Randall, the worst thing that ever happened to me was the day they brought you home.”

They both look miserable. Randall leaves.

Kevin shows to be hurt and remorseful as well.

He spends a few seconds regretting his actions.

And is stopped by his phone ringing.

Kevin reads his uncle message.

He gets back to reality: Madison is still there and he needs to go back inside.

He sighs because he didn’t get to clear his head like he intended to. Instead, he just ended up getting even more disturbed.

Now, Kevin seems to be a little reluctant to talk to Madison, because his brother mentioned of his biggest insecurities: not being able to take care of his mother. And it’s not even the first time something of that nature happens: his sister once mocked the idea of him being a father too. It’s something that he’s really self-conscious about: not being capable of taking care of his loved ones. So, I guess that here Kevin had just entered a self-doubting mode.

Ultimately, he seems to realize Madison just needs him to be there and goes back in anyway.

Kevin enters the room:

The beginning of the sequence was BY FAR my favorite part of the entire episode. I reckon it's very intriguing the way they played everything out: they showed Kevin entering the room and the glances he exchanged with Madison. Which, if you think about it, would normally be a really monotone, not special and weird thing to focus on. However, there is something different about the way the actors deliver the scene, specially Justin, since the camera is primarily on him.

I personally find there to be something really enchanting on scenes that are done with the least amount of elements as possible. I have a special admiration when actors are able to deliver their performances with almost or no makeup at all and no lines or footage.

For example, I love clips where character A is listening to character B on the phone or a tape and you don’t get to see character B, but you are able to feel the emotion and the intensity the scene requires only by the way their voice sounds, the hesitation, the pauses they take and all of that.

And I’m also fond of silent sequences where everything that needs to be said is in the characters’ eyes, the way they move, their gestures and the rhythm of their breath. I LOVE paying attention to all of these little details.

And here Kevin stares at Madison with an amount of sensitiveness, understanding, empathy and softness that he had never given her before. In fact, I might be wrong, but I don’t recall him E-V-E-R looking at someone in such way, much less THAT intensely.

And there seems to be a lit bit of nervousness too. 

Which reminds me of a thing Justin said about these two: 

“I think if you know Kevin and the way that his mind works and the way that he goes about his business and the way he attacks situations, when he commits to something, he’s all in. (…) Now, things have changed. She’s pregnant with what she says are his twins and with the information that he has, ‘OK, she’s carrying my two children,’ so now everything has changed. Everything looks different, right? What Kevin saw before was this flighty sort of annoying friend of Kate’s. And then it turned into this one moment that they had together where they were sort of sharing in their own misery, right? One was lonely and one was sad and depressed and it was a perfect storm and that’s kind of all it was. (…) And then the unintended consequence of all that is she’s pregnant. So when she says things to him like, ‘This is kind of a miracle’ for me, I think everything changes. He sees her in a different light, obviously. (...)”

And I don’t know if that were scripted or just the actor’s approach (I really wish I could, though, because that sequence was simply brilliant), but it seems that Justin really wanted to incorporate this idea of Kevin seeing Madison in a whole new light.

In a way, it’s like he is seeing her for the very first time.

Kevin is also taking exceptional caution in every single move he makes, even with an action as simple as shutting the door. He closes it smoothly.

And they really focus on Kevin gazing at Madison.

While none of them is saying anything

and he approaches slowly

with just such a gentle look.

There’s literally around T-H-I-R-T-Y freaking SECONDS of this scene just dedicated to these quiet moments before Kevin finally says a word.

He calmly sits down in front of her. 

Madison waits for him to say anything.

Yet, he looks away and his face assumes this thoughtful countenance.

Then, Madison stops staring at him and looks down.

It’s only when Madison is not gazing at him anymore that Kevin sets his eyes on her again. There’s just something so pure, fragile and delicate about this entire sequence that I consider really touching.

“I’m so sick of chasing ghosts. I’m tired of doubting myself,” he shares. 

There’s also something implicitly significant about this. He is genuinely confiding in her. It’s another example of that raw honesty that Kevin seems to have with Madison and not even to be aware of it. It just looks like he voices his thoughts and feelings so easily with her. They don’t have a lot of scenes together yet, but there are already two substantial clips of them talking. And on both moments, he spontaneously gives her unsolicited information about himself. It’s like Kevin doesn’t feel the need to censor himself around her, it seems like he subconsciously feels comfortable enough with Madison to show his weariness, sadness and overall vulnerability. 

And Madison doesn’t seem to be annoyed by the fact he starts pouring his feelings out to her instead of talking about their current situation. She doesn’t turn him away. Madison remains quiet, pays attention and just gives Kevin the opportunity to share whatever he needs and wants.

“I’m all in, Madison. Whatever you need, I am all in,” he promises.

Madison's eyes widen in surprise

and he gives her this very subtle smile.

Kevin continues, “I want this.

And maybe I, I, I didn't think it would b...” He refrains himself from finishing that sentence, because it could’ve given Madison the wrong impression: that he will not love his child (children) the same way he would love them if the pregnancy had been planned and the baby (babies) was (were) a result of wedlock. 

Which is most certainly not the case and he lets her know his priority from now on will be his family, not the past.

Kevin glances softly at Madison one more time.  

“I wanna be a father,” he murmurs. Again, Kevin is confiding in Madison. He is opening up to her and saying things that he doesn’t have to say nor she has the obligation or necessity to know, but he still shares and she still listens to all of it attentively. 

The way Justin delivers this line is so special too. He pronounces it with a low, quiet voice. He shows us that Kevin is venting to her, because that is something he has craved so badly for so long and was almost losing hope of accomplishing. 

And Madison gives him a comprehensive and compassionate look, because she gets it. People usually don’t see her as a profound or mature person. Her relationships don’t even get to the point where discussing kids becomes a possibility. The last guy she dated broke up with her because he couldn’t picture them having a future together. Her medical history is complicated as well and the odds of her having children naturally were almost null. She not only understands it, but also has lived all of it through the years.

“I think I’d be great at it,” he tells her.

Kevin just keeps pouring his heart out to her, because a family of his own is something he has really longed to and and for over an entire year he’s been frustrated with the idea of not fulfilling this particular dream, specially since he feels he can do it and just needs the opportunity to prove it to himself and everyone.

By then, Kevin is already talking about it with a dreamy voice and look on his face.

“The love of my life will be my child,” he concludes, reinforcing that he is serious about it.

“Children,” Madison corrects him.

It appears Kevin doesn’t know what to say now: he slightly trembles, but there’s still some kind of exhilaration in his eyes. It’s like he is asking her: wait, are you saying what I think you’re saying? Is this actually happening?

“It’s twins, Kevin!”, she reveals.

There’s something also very special about the way Caitlin delivers her line. Madison says it in a way that is so soft, because she still can’t believe this indeed happening, but there is emotion and enthusiasm too and she pronounces those words in a way that sort of sounds like she is singing. Like something Madison is still getting used to, but she loves repeating to herself and being reminded of.

And Kevin doesn’t know how to respond to that, but you can see his face slowly light up like a child.

There is this pure, dreamy and joyful look in his eyes all over again.

It’s not a large smile just yet, because he also can’t believe that’s actually happening, but Madison is able to read him and she sees in him the mix of surprise, thrill and barely being able to react or say a single word, because that simply sounds too good to be true.

By that moment, Madison is already feeling relieved and comfortable around Kevin and she gives him another smile and shrugs. He doesn’t need to say anything out loud, because Madison understands what that silence means: she has become familiar with that mix of emotions as well. She feels it, she k-n-o-w-s.

PS: Feel free too add your notes, I’d love to know your comments on their scenes from this episode. :) 

[bazypitchandsimonsnow]

Being Simon

Chapter 1: The Past

Chapter 1/2 (All chapters)

Rating: T

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Word Count:  8493

Summary:  Simon's type of therapy is...unusual to say the least. He has the incredible chance to go back in time to fix what he regrets. However, things get more complicated when Simon meets someone very interesting in the past.

Read on AO3

AN: Ahahahaha I did it!!! I finished a fic! That's a big achievement for me nowadays tbh. This has taken forever because stupid fucking health, but I did it! Of course I'm not 100% good with it but I'm still proud. Being Erica is one of my fave shows ever and is severely underrated imo. Then I saw this post and was like "oh damn that would be great for snowbaz." Now like three-four months late, here we are! Big thank you to @carryonmylovelies​ as always. She has been a big support for me through this writing slump. I couldn't be more grateful for her <3

World basics: time travel therapy is a thing, no further explanation given, and going back in time to fix past regrets teaches patients how to live better in the present. Patients take over their past selves' bodies for a bit. Patients can return from the past either suddenly or by stepping through doors. So just imagine Simon doing that. Saying much more is spoilers. 

I’m gonna post chapter 1 today, then chapter 2 sometime within the next week. Hopefully y'all like it!

———————————————

You know that guy who’s got it all? A perfect job, a perfect partner, wonderful family, a life that people are secretly jealous of? You know that guy, everyone knows that guy. Unfortunately, I am not that guy.

My name is Simon Snow, and I’m a fuck up. But I’m getting better.

“Mr. Snow, Mr. Snow!” Cassidy shouts, waving her hand, “I know the answer!”

“Cass,” I say, “what did we say about inside voices?”

She pouts and crosses her arms. “Keep the volume down for all those around.”

“Exactly. Now, try again.” Cassidy raises her arm with no added sound effects. I point my chalk at her. “Cassidy, what’s the answer?”

She puts her hand down, grinning wide. “It’s 42.”

I hold my hand out to her. “Nice job, Cassy, right on the money.”

She gives me a big high five. The feeling of accomplishment surges through me. God, I love this job. My old customer service work made me feel dead inside. Day in, day out, same old fucking garbage from garbage customers. It was just never something I wanted to do. Now I get to see a little girl smile, and I helped her smile. Yeah, little self centred, but I’ll take it.

“Patrick,” I say, “can you tell me how we can find 8 times 4?”

Patrick nods and starts rattling off the technique he’s come up with. It’s a bit odd and round about but all his. That’s what I love about kids, the strange and unique things their little minds come up with. It’s why I wanted to be a teacher in the first place, before I lost my way.

The bell rings and everyone's on their feet immediately. “Alright everyone,” I shout over the clamour, “make sure to finish chapter three for tonight. And get your worksheets done! We’re going to go over them with a fine toothed comb. Have a good weekend, kids.”

“Bye, Mr. Snow,” they all parrot back. I wave them off, then start on my laptop. Being a teacher means having a lot of paperwork. (Or Google Doc work, I guess.) Everything is in mismatched folders and I have to scour them for my lesson plan draft. Unfortunately, I’m still not great at organization, but I’m working on it. I’m working on a lot in my life.

My phone rings. I look up from my screen, and notice there’s no sunlight from the windows. Holy shit, how long have I been sitting here? I quickly grab my phone. “Hello?”

“Simon!” Todd shouts. “Where the fuck are you?”

“Oh, uh, hi Todd.” Fuck, what did I do this time? “I-I’m still at work...”

He scoffs. “Of course you are. Shit, Simon, I’ve been sitting at Casper’s for an hour!”

My heart drops. I look down at my watch. It’s 6:34. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, love, I just totally lost track of time-”

“Yeah, I guessed that. I should expect that of you now.”

Well, that stings. A lot. I’ve felt like a screw up my whole life, so much so even my parents didn’t want me. Like they had some prophetic vision that their kid would be a no good moron. Therapy has started to rid me of those thoughts, but they still creep up every once in a while. Like now.

“I’m sorry, darling, I’m really sorry. We can go to my place, have take away-”

“No, Simon,” he sighs. “I just...I picked the day, the time, and the restaurant. All you had to do was bloody show up, and you couldn’t even do that. I mean...do you even care, Simon?”

A horrible, familiar pain goes through my heart. I can still hear Agatha’s voice all these years later. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. My thoughts get all muddled up, mixing up old fears and trauma with today.

“I do care, Todd, I really do. I just- I didn’t- I was- We can-”

“Please stop..” He sighs again. I can almost see him rubbing his pretty black eyebrows together. “Don’t stress stutter, it’s alright. Enjoy your work and takeaway.”

“Uh, could we reschedule?”

“No, we can’t.”

I gulp. I hate that I know what’s coming. “Are...are you too busy?”

“No, I’m just...I’m done. I can’t do this anymore, Simon. Hope you do well. I mean that.”

I slump in my chair. “Okay. You too. Bye, Todd.”

“Goodbye, Simon.”

He hangs up, but I keep the phone by my ear. My body feels too heavy to move and get out of this fucking chair. Once again, I screwed up my relationship. And the fact that it’s too familiar is even worse. This is what, the third partner I’ve lost in the last year? An abysmal track record. Before that I had been alone since uni, yeah, but I think it was better than feeling like this.

Slowly, I pack up all my stuff. Everything is quiet, like the world is in mourning for my latest lost relationship. Self centered as fuck but a nice thought. I sling my book bag over my shoulder and walk towards the door. It’s not even a shock when I don’t enter the foyer, but step through and end up in Dr. Margaret’s stony yet brightly lit office instead, complete with torches and pristine furniture. It’s like some medieval version of an IKEA showroom. Dr. Margaret is sitting in her chair with a book in hand, obviously waiting for me. Just another day with a super powered therapist who has her office in a pocket dimension outside of our reality. (That’s my theory anyway).

I speed walk forward and flop down face first on her white couch. “Hi to you too, Simon,” she says. I groan into the cushions. “Good day, huh?” I groan louder. “Tell me what happened or get off my couch.”

I move my face to the side, glaring at Dr. Margaret. She just keeps looking at me blankly from her large leather chair. Dr. Margaret has little time for my whining, something I usually appreciate. “Todd broke up with me.”

“You poor baby.”

I narrow my eyes even more. “Aren’t therapists supposed to be all sympathetic and shit?”

She scoffs. “Sympathetic when you’re not being pathetic.”

“My boyfriend just broke up with me, I’m allowed to be a bit pathetic.” I rub my very strained forehead. “I always get dumped.”

“Mhm.” Dr. Margaret picks up the notepad, the one I filled with my regrets the first day we met. It’s embarrassingly long, but a lot are crossed off too. “Tell me about ‘breakup with Agatha.’”

I groan, head falling back against the couch. “God, that’s one I’ve been waiting for.”

“Stop groaning and tell me.”

“Okay, okay, gimme a sec.” I sit up and put my elbows on my knees, rubbing my temple. Headache is coming. Though I’ve started to actually pay attention to my health and take care of myself now (thanks to Dr. Margaret), the headaches still happen sometimes. Especially when I think about this.

“It was 2003,” I sigh. “Agatha and I had been together for six years. Just before third year finals, Agatha broke up with me. I got really pissed at her. Turned into a huge screaming match. She said I didn’t care, and I called her an arsehole that never loved me.” I run a hand through my hair. Old stress habit. “I’ll never forget the look on her face. She was so unbelievably hurt. I knew it was wrong the moment after I said it, but I was too angry and proud to apologize. Agatha walked out. And that was the last time I ever saw her.” The words piece my heart like a knife. I feel like I'm about to shatter into pieces “We avoided each other all through finals. Right after graduation, Agatha moved to California for her masters. She wouldn’t take my calls, then she changed her number. So I gave up. Haven’t talked to her in twelve years. No idea where she is now and what she’s doing.”

Dr. Margaret nods thoughtfully, placing the notebook down. “What would you do differently? Try to fix things? Stay together?”

I shake my head vigorously. “No, god no. We weren’t good as a couple. But Agatha was one of my closest friends way before she was my girlfriend. I just, I want the breakup to not be so awful. That way we can stay friends. I want to keep her in my life. If I wasn’t such an arse, she would be.”

“Sounds reasonable. Let’s see if you can do it.”

A familiar chill hits me. At first it was terrifying but now I expect it. “Alright.”

Dr. Margaret nods, and the world spins.

———————————————

“You’re not hearing me, Simon!” Agatha screams. “I’m trying to tell you that it’s over!”

I stumble, blinking at Agatha and trying to focus on what’s around me. Dirty walls, Lady Gaga posters, a shitty desk I picked up off the curb. Yeah, this is definitely my uni apartment. And this is definitely Agatha screaming at me, trying to break things off and I’ve just been yelling. She’s so mad but I can’t help but smile. God, I’ve missed her.

“What are you smiling about?! Are you listening to me?!” She groans and shakes her head. “We’re done, Si. I can’t do this anymore. Goodbye.”

She turns around to leave and my pulse skyrockets. No no, not again. “Ags, wait! I-I am listening. Please, don’t leave!”

Agatha freezes, hand on the knob. She glares at me over her shoulder. “What?”

“I-I’m sorry for yelling, that was awful. Can we just sit down and talk this out? Please?”

She looks me over, probably trying to figure out if I’m being sincere. I know I am, but as far as she's concerned I was screaming my bloody lungs out a minute ago. Must be weird for her. Thankfully, she lets go of the knob. “Fine.”

I sigh in utter relief. I sit down on my shitty mattress (pretty sure I got this off the curb too) and Agatha follows. She’s tense, arms crossed. I fiddle with my fingers. The nail beds are all chewed up, hangnails surrounded by dark dried blood. Glad I broke that habit, but right now I sort of wish I still did it. It made me feel better.

“Are you going to say something?” Agatha asks, voice biting.

“Yeah, yeah, just, uh...” I rub the back of my neck. Words are getting fucked up again.

“You’re not going to change my mind, Simon. We’re through.”

“I know, Ags, I know. I don’t want us to stay together.”

Her eyebrows furrow. It’s really cute. I miss when she did that. “You don’t?”

“No, no, we’re not good as a couple. We don’t work well.”

“Oh.” Her arms fall into her lap. “Okay. Yeah, I think the same.”

“Awesome.” I turn towards her with a big grin. “But, uh, could we still be friends though? You’ve always been one of my best friends, Agatha. I-I don’t want to lose you after this.”

Agatha rubs her lips together, But slowly, she nods. “Okay, yeah.”

A huge weight lifts off my shoulders. I grin so wide it hurts. “That’s great! That’s so great. I-I just, I don’t want to lose you just cause our relationship didn’t work out.”

She looks even more confused, and I’m not sure why. “What do you mean ‘didn’t work out?’”

“Well, I-I mean, y’know, we just don’t work as a couple. We haven’t been happy for awhile because things have kind of...fizzled out, right?”

Suddenly, that infuriated expression comes back. She groans and stands up. “I can’t believe you, Si! You really haven’t been listening to anything I’ve said, have you?!”

I stand up too. “No, no, I have! You want to break up, and I get why, we’re not happy together. We’re not a good couple-”

“Because of you!” she screams. I stumble back slightly from the force of her words.  “You fucked up!”

A horrible, upset, disgusted feeling takes over my whole body. Like my very soul is sicking up. I step towards her, reaching out. “Ags, I don’t know what you mean. H-How did I ruin things? Tell me what I did wrong!”

She shakes her head and backs away. “I’ve told you a hundred times, Si. If you don’t know by now, I don’t think you ever will.”

Agatha starts to stomp away. I chase after her. “Agatha! Ags, please, don’t-”

She slams the door so hard all my knick knacks rattle. I’m left in silence, except for the thoughts rattling around in my head. Fuck, what did I say? What did I do? I can’t think of anything I’ve done horrible enough to warrant such a response from Agatha. I pull at my hair and gnaw at my nail beds. I mean, this me already does it, so where’s the harm? Fuck, I don’t know what I did. I can’t remember!

Penny. I gotta go find Penny. She always has the answers. She’ll remember why I fucked up. I rush out the door and swing my way down the shitty stairs, careful to avoid the usual vomit puddles. I’m speed walking across the lawn towards Pen’s TA building when I spot familiar frizzy white hair.

“That was fast,” Dr. Margaret says, looking down at her book with a Starbucks drink in hand. She’s dressed in a horribly ugly orange tank top and boho skirt. Perfect for 2003. She needs to blend in with the time period, or at least that’s what she says. I think she just likes to dress up. “Saw her storm out. Looked really mad.”

“What the fuck was the point of this?!” I yell. I’m so angry, I can’t help it. My temper is something I need to work on but I really don’t care right now. “I still cocked things up with Agatha, so she still hates me, and all I’ve learned is that I apparently did something horrible that I don’t even remember because it’s been twelve bloody years!”

She takes a long drink from her large Starbucks cup. “Hm. Quite difficult. What’re you going to do?”

“Find Penny, I guess, She’ll know, right?”

Dr. Margaret shrugs. “Don’t know. You have a phone. Call her.”

Oh, right, phones are a thing. I dig around in my cargo shorts (god, I can’t believe, I used to wear these things) and pull out my old Nokia slide phone. I sneer at the thing. It was my first and shittiest cell phone. I thought I was so cool because my mobile slid out. I was such a prat.

I go to my contacts, and Penny is one of five. That makes me a little sad. I always liked people, but I was always bad at making real friends. I’ve gotten better now but past me barely had anyone. I click her number, and she picks up after two rings.

“Hey, Simon, what’s up?” she asks.

“Um, not much,” I respond automatically. Dr. Margaret glares at me. Right, I don’t need to push down my problems and pretend everything is okay. Penny’s my friend, she’ll want to help. “Actually, there’s a lot. Aggie and I just broke up.”

“Oh Si, I’m so sorry. How’re you feeling?”

“Not too bad. I guess it was inevitable. I’m more confused than anything. Ags said I ruined it by doing something, but I’m not sure what I did. Do you have any idea what she meant?”

“Uh...I really don’t know. She hasn’t told me anything. She doesn’t usually tell me things anyway.”

I sigh and rub my face. “Yeah, true. I’ll figure it out. Thanks, Pen.”

“Welcome, Simon. Love you.”

“Love you, too.” I hang up and shove my phone back in my massive pocket. Dr. Margaret is back to reading. “Well, that was no help.”

“Too bad. Maybe going to the source would be better.”

I frown in utter confusion. “You want me to go talk to Agatha again?”

“She knows what’s wrong. You don’t. Ask her.”

I put my hands on my hips. “You’re never this direct. What’s going on?”

She flicks her eyes to me, smiling slyly. “Don’t trust me, Simon?”

“No! I just know you always have something else going on. Nothing in therapy is ever easy or simple.”

“Know that. Taught you that.” She snaps the book closed. “Do what you think is best, Simon. Then live with choices.”

She stands up, book tucked into her hippie purse, and walks down the lawn. I huff, blowing a piece of stray hair out of my face. “You know I hate when you say that! It’s just pointing out the obvious! That’s lazy therapy!”

Dr. Margaret, the woman who has changed my life in so many ways, makes the “whatever” W sign at me. I chuckle and shake my head. Okay, well, this is probably some weird test (again), but Dr. Margaret has a point. Best to be direct. Maybe Agatha will have cooled down by the time I get there. I should do something nice. Bring her flowers, yeah, that’s a good idea. I look down at my cargo shorts, baggy Eminem shirt, and filthy knock off converse. Definitely need to change too.

I rush back to my apartment. It’s dingy and gross, but there’s a weird nostalgia to it. I should’ve put up more posters. (Why can’t that be a regret? That would be so much easier.) My dresser is bursting at the seams as usual. I throw my t-shirts around looking for something passable, but everything is dirty, tacky, smells like weed, or all of the above.

“Christ, how did I live like this?” I grumble, as if I wasn’t pretty much still living like this a year ago. (Minus the weed. Kicked that after uni, thankfully.)

Eventually I find a plain brown shirt and a pair of jeans with only one tomato sauce stain. Alright, I’m passable now at least. That’ll get Agatha’s attention just because it’s so out of character for who I am in this time. I open the old pickle jar where I keep all my change and scrounge together about 20 quid. Should be enough for flowers, especially before the 2008 crash. The exchange rate is the only thing I miss about the past, honestly.

“Alright,” I mutter to myself, slinging my bookbag over my shoulder, “decent clothes, okay hair, pocket change, bag to hold flowers. Let’s do this.”

I walk out my front door feeling confident, hopefully not too much. Can’t get a big head. Need to focus on Agatha.

“Simon, mate.” I turn around to see Rhys wheeling out of his flat. “What’s up? Heard a lot of shouting earlier, you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m cool, man. Agatha and I broke up and things got messy.”

He inhales sharply between his teeth. “Yikes. Sorry to hear that. Can’t believe she dumped you for that snotty prep.”

I stand ramrod straight, then spin around on my heels to face him properly. “What snotty prep?”

“Oh you didn’t know?”

“Didn’t know what?!”

Rhys raises his hands in surrender. “Whoa, take it easy, man.”

Shit. Reel in your temper, Simon, don’t explode. “Sorry, sorry, mate. Just, what are you talking about with this prep?”

“Yeah, this preppy pretty boy Agatha sits next to in our romantic literature and creative writing classes. They’ve always got their heads together. I didn’t say anything because it wasn’t my business, but then you said you two broke up, so...”

“So you thought she told me, got it.” I rub my temples. Headache is coming back. “Do you know who he is?”

Rhys scratches the side of his head. “Yeah, think so. Tall, dark-ish skin, grey eyes, posh accent, even more posh clothes. Name starts with a T. Terrence, Terry, Tyler-” He snaps his fingers and points at me. “Ty! That’s it!”

My face scrunches up. “Ty? Ty what?”

“Dunno. Just Ty, I guess. Like Madonna. Dude thinks he’s better than fucking everyone just because he’s rich or something.”

My blood boils to a fever pitch. So Agatha broke up with me for someone prettier and richer. She said it was my fault because she didn’t want to hurt my feelings. Mission failed, because I am fucking gutted.

“Thanks for telling me, mate,” I say, holding out my fist to him. He bumps his own against mine. “Really appreciate it.”

“Sure thing, mate. Come have a beer with us to commiserate?”

I chuckle. “Yeah, but you may have to remind me later. Brain like sieve.”

“Gotchu. See ya.”

“See ya.”

Rhys rolls down the hall towards Gareth’s. Right, it’s their weekly beer and footie night. I would hang out with them sometimes. I miss that. I should call them when I’m back in 2015. Right now though, I have a mission.

———————————————

Finding Ty will be pretty easy. I know when Agatha and Rhys’ creative writing class is, which is in a couple of minutes. (Rhys skipped a lot of class. Luckily he was a genius so he graduated at the top of our year. And Agatha never went to class when she was upset, so I know I won’t see her.) I run over to the building I know it’s in, a massive hall made from dingy grey stone and filled with caffeine addicted twenty somethings. Then I sit by a tree, waiting to see someone like Rhys described. Oh and when I find him I’ll- Well, I’ll do something. Not sure yet but it’ll be something!

Droves of zombified uni students pass me by. None of them look posh and preppy enough to be like this Ty dude. He sounds like such a twat. What the fuck does Agatha see in him? (Or did see in him, I guess. Time travel is weird.) Maybe Agatha is still with him. Maybe they went to California together. She talked about me going with her for a bit, but I was scared to leave England. I don’t regret staying, but I do regret the crushed look on her face.

The guy passes by me. He looks ridiculous, wearing oxfords, black slacks, and a goddamn tweed jacket with leather patches on the sleeves. It’s the preppiest posh shit I’ve ever seen. I can see his hands, curled around his textbook, and his slicked back hair. Dark-ish skin and ear length black hair. I’m on my feet in an instant.

“Hey!” I shout. He doesn’t move. “Hey, Ty! I’m talking to you!”

He finally turns around, and my heart stops for a second. Holy shit. This guy is beautiful. Like, super model on the cover of a high end fashion magazine gorgeous. He’s got cheekbones sharp enough to cut glass and his eyes aren’t just grey, they’re green and blue mixed together. Like deep ocean water. And right now they’re staring at me like I’ve lost my goddamn mind.

“Yes?” he says. His voice is smooth, strong, really pretty. “You called my name?”

I shake off my small gay panic (technically pansexual panic) and my anger returns. I glare hard at him. “Yeah, I did. My name is Simon Snow, Agatha’s boyfriend.”

His confusion quickly switches to stone faced boredom. “Oh you’re the boyfriend. Well, the ex-boyfriend now, according to the text Agatha sent me.” He tilts his head to the side, ocean eyes scanning me over. “I thought you’d be taller.”

My body feels like it’s on fire. This guy may be hot but he’s a total prick. How could Agatha dump me for him?! “Who do you think you are, huh? Flirting with someone’s girlfriend? That’s fucking low, you pathetic shit!”

He scoffs, putting on hand on his hip. “Very well spoken. If you’re done with your little alpha male display, I have a class to get to.”

Ty turns away. I’m ready to explode. I haven’t felt this angry in years but this guy is getting so under my skin. I grab his shoulder and force him to look at me.

“You don’t get to walk away, dick!” I roar. “Do you think you’re better than me?! Well you’re not!”

“I’m not the one shouting at a random stranger on the quad.”

“I’m shouting because you stole my girlfriend!”

“I didn’t steal her, you sexist shit,” he hisses. “She’s my  friend. Are you the kind of arse to not allow his girlfriend to have friends?”

“No! And I’m not sexist! I just don’t like someone flirting with the girl I was with when I was with her, especially when you’re all...posh and shit!”

Ty scoffs again and leans forward. “Well, at least I don’t wear dirty jeans out in public. I have more self respect than that.”

My entire body explodes in a way it hasn’t in ages. My vision goes completely fucking red. I shove Ty, hard. Way harder than I mean to. He stumbles backwards, dropping his books on the grass. He looks at me in utter shock.

“What the fuck?!” Ty shouts. He then shoves my shoulders, and I stumble five steps back. Holy shit, he’s strong. 

“Fuck you!” I shout back. I charge forward with all my might. Ty blocks me but that doesn’t stop me. I claw and push and pull at him, no clue what I’m doing at all. I’m just so angry and pushing it all at him. He pushes back just as hard. Neither of us will give an inch. We scrabble like a pair of cats. I can’t think, I just feel. I'm so angry and sad and worthless because...because....

Because I’m losing my friend again. And I don’t know what to do.

My hits get weaker and weaker. All the energy dribbles out like a melting ice cream in July. As I slow down, Ty stops pushing back. My arms fall down at my sides. His hands rest awkwardly on my shoulders.

“Uh,” he says, “are you alright?”

“No,” I choke out. Tears fill my eyes and cloud my vision. “No, I’m not.”

I break down, crying with heavy, ugly sobs. Everything is just collapsing in and around me. I really am losing Agatha all over again. It hurts even more this time. I’ve never fallen apart this badly on a regret. But everything from the past and present, losing all my partners in the past year then Agatha again, is just hitting me in one terrible mental blow.

“Oh shit,” he says. “Um...” I feel his hand move off my shoulder and slowly pat my head. “There, there?”

I snort like one of the kids I teach. I pull back, wiping the still flowing tears under my eye. “Seriously? That’s the best you can do?”

Though it’s a bit hard to tell, I think Ty’s face flushes. He crosses his arms defiantly. “Well, what the fuck are you supposed to do when a stranger attacks you then breaks down crying?”

I shrug. “Dunno, really. This is new for me too.”

Ty rubs the back of his neck, shuffling his polished oxfords in the dirt. I’m still sniffling like a child. “You want to go somewhere private? Where no one can see you?”

My eyes catch a couple of people glancing and outright staring at us. Or just at me. I nod vigorously. “Yeah, that would be good.”

Ty collects up the books I knocked out of his hands. He jerks his head to the side, and I follow behind him. Tears are still streaming down my face. They won’t stop no matter how hard I try. Ty leads us through a secluded area, past large trees and bushes, until we reach a completely hidden, beautiful ravine. Holy shit. Was this always here? I went to this uni for three years and I have no memory of this place. Either I’m super oblivious or getting old. (Probably both.)

We go past a couple more bushes until we come upon a ramshackle rainbow coloured bench against some trees. It looks handmade by some stoned out art major. The mess of cigarette and joint butts on the ground only reinforces that theory. Ty sits on one end of the bench. I take the other, but we’re still pretty close. It’s not very big. We sit in silence for a bit, save for my continued sniffling. Something bumps my arm. I look down to see Ty’s long fingered hand holding out a cigarette pack.

“Want one?” he asks.

“Smoking is bad for you,” I say automatically.

“Like you’re one to talk. You reek of marijuana”

“Fuck, really?” I sniff my shirt collar and get a whiff of weed. I groan, letting my head fall back against the tree. “Dammit. Thought this one was clean.”

“Unfortunately not.” He shakes the box. “You want one or no?”

I sigh and pluck a stick out of the box. Ty takes one as well, then pulls out a pristine silver Zippo lighter. He lights us both with one flame. I watch the paper crinkle and shrivel away into ash. I’m a bit nervous. Technically, I haven’t smoked anything in over a decade. Hopefully I can depend on past me’s muscle memory. 

Ty takes a long, deep draft and breathes out a long puff of smoke. I try to mimic him. My lungs burn with the heat of twin suns. I wheeze out, thumping my chest. Ty throws his head back laughing,  hair touching his neck.

“You must be a shitty stoner,” he chuckles.

“Yeah,” I cough, “never been great at inhaling.”

“Bring it into your mouth, then your lungs. Don’t do it all once.”

I nod, even though I kind of knew that. Just been awhile. I smoked a few joints but I preferred my old bong. But I try again, doing what Ty said. This time I only cough a little instead of wheezing like the world’s most pathetic dragon.

“There you go,” Ty drawls. He’s definitely mocking me a little.

“Fuck off.”

“Christ, what bug crawled up your arse?”

I glare at him, and his face is completely unaffected. “The bug that Agatha broke up with me for you.”

He scoffs, flicking cigarette ash on the ground. “Your  ex- girlfriend did not break up with you to be with me. We’re only friends. I’d never date her.”

“That’s mean, Agatha is amazing.”

Ty rolls his eyes dramatically. “It has nothing to do with Agatha. She’s wonderful. I just don’t like women.”

My eyes grow wider than saucer plates “You’re gay?”

He cocks an eyebrow. How did he get so good at that? Does he practice in the mirror? “You have a problem with that, Snow?”

“No, no, of course not. Just didn’t realise...”

“It’s not like I’m hiding it.” He gestures to his perfectly pressed button down, spotless navy slacks, and polished Oxfords. Okay, he has a point, most straight men don’t take such meticulous care of their clothes. 2003 closeted me had the excuse of being heteronormative as fuck, but 2015 pansexual me needs to work on his gaydar.

“I, uh, didn’t want to assume...” Usually a safe answer in my experience.

“How noble.” Ty takes a long drag. I still hate cigarettes, but the way his lips fit around the smoke plume is kind of attractive. “Agatha knows I’m gay. I told her after she almost kissed me.”

“What?!” I throw down the cigarette and shoot to my feet. The fire in my gut is back, along with the sense of utter worthlessness. I fucked up so badly, made Agatha so miserable, that she nearly kissed a gay bloke. I feel so awful and confused and I don’t know what I'm supposed to do, I’m just mad.

He rolls his eyes,  again. “Sit down, alpha male, I said ‘almost.’ I’m not even sure she realised what she was doing, we were both completely pissed. She leaned forward slightly and I blurted out that I was gay. Then she promptly burst into tears.”

My heart feels like someone has reached inside and twisted every vein. My arms relax at my sides. “She...she was crying?”

“Yes, quite heavily.” He taps the cig with one long, graceful finger. (Does he play piano? He should.) “She said she was sorry, then blubbered for an hour about how conflicted she felt about wanting to break up with you.”

The impact of those words send me back down onto the bench. My whole body feels heavier than lead. “She felt conflicted?”

“Of course she did.”

“I-I thought this was easy for her. That our relationship was already going downhill, then I did something so bad she decided to end it. And then I thought it was because she found you, someone better than me.”

Ty scoffs. “My god, she was right, you are completely oblivious.”

I scowl at him. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said. You’re so blind to what you’ve been doing.”

“What’ve I been doing?!”

“You’ve been a terrible boyfriend!” he yells. “You’re forgetful, you miss things, you don’t pay attention to Agatha, and most of all you take her for granted!” He sighs, rolling the half finished cig between his fingers. “Ags says you don’t mean to do it, you’re just oblivious, but she’s still hurt. There isn’t one bad thing you did, Snow. You’ve been hurting her for awhile.”

Every word is slap to the face. My body literally aches with all the guilt I feel. Ty is right. I was an awful,  awful boyfriend. Every missed date, every burnt meal, every stupid thing I’ve ever said, they all rush into me. Fucking hell. How could I have not seen it? I always had reasons, and they were always small things. But I guess a lot of small things pile up.

“Fuck,” I choke out. Tears make little wet spots on the dirt floor. I don’t know when I started crying again. God, I’m a mess.

“Please don’t cry,” Ty says, sounding almost sympathetic. “I only have so many cigarettes.”

That makes a laugh surprisingly fly out of my mouth. Yet I’m still picking at my nails, flicking away bits of my cuticle like I want to get rid of my pain. I’m nervously babbling before I even realise it. “My brain’s always filled with...stuff. Keeping my scholarship, keeping my job, working towards my future. E-Everything’s always been about my future, what I’ll do eventually, even with Agatha. She was supposed to be my happy ending after all the shit I’ve been through.”

“She’s a person,” he mutters, “not your goal.”

“I know that!” I rub away more tears. “Well, I’m learning. I dunno. I-I had a shitty childhood, okay? So I’m always waiting for things to get better. And I thought if I did well at school and found a nice girl, things would just fall into place. Turns out shit is more complicated than that.”

I laugh to try to break the tension, but Ty stays silent. I cautiously flick my eyes over to him. He’s still holding his cigarette. It’s burnt down to the filter. His face is stone again, yet I can see the slight tremor in his fingers. It’s miniscule but it’s there. I don’t think he’s okay, but I barely know this guy, I’m scared to ask.

“I don’t know how to fix things with Agatha,” I sigh. “I’m bad at talking, bad at relationships, sometimes bad at friendships. It’s not like I want her back. I...I just want her in life. She’s amazing. I don’t- I can’t lose her again.”

“Again?” he says. My face goes bright red and my breath hitches. Fuck. Stupid time travel, screwing things up.

“Y-Yeah, we’ve had fights before, stopped talking for a while. I know this feeling, I hate it. I want her to be in my life and be happy and I don’t know how to do that!”

“Tell her that.”

I face him, blinking in confusion. “What?”

Ty sighs and flicks the butt onto the ground, crushing it beneath the toe of his utterly perfect oxford. “Tell her that. Say you’re scared and clueless but you want to still be friends, so you want to figure out how to do that. Be honest. What else are you going to do?”

My mouth flaps up and down. Fuck. It’s so damn obvious yet it never came to mind. I thought I needed something big and smart so Agatha would understand. But... “All I need to do is be honest with her.”

“Exactly.”

I smile for the first time since I got here. “Wow, can’t believe I didn’t think of that.”

“You do seem to be a bit thick.” His slight smirk and teasing lilt save me from getting angry. I scoff and shake my head.

“Yeah, well, you seem like a bit of a prick.” He scoffs too, but he’s still smiling.

We sit there in silence for a little. All I can hear is birds chirping and students in the distance. I feel calm. So calm I don’t want to get up for a while. I just want to catch my breath. Ty slowly tilts his head back over the bench.

“I haven’t sat down in awhile,” he says quietly, almost as if to himself, but too loud for me not to hear. “I’m always at class or studying. I don’t sit down and just...sit.”

“Well you haven’t really been only sitting,” I chuckle. “You’ve been helping me.”

“Would it be sad that this has actually been the most relaxing time I’ve had in months?”

“Uh, yeah, and a bit concerning.”

Ty laughs a little louder this time. His smile seems a bit more genuine, but his pretty eyes are a bit sad. It may just be his face. It looks like it’s designed for pouting. “I’m a political science and English double major getting ready for law school. My whole life is stress.”

I chuckle sadly. “Sounds like a nightmare.”

“It is. A nightmare I chose...” He spins the cigarette pack between two fingers. I know he’s just fiddling but it looks so damn cool when he does it.

“Doesn’t seem like you’re happy about that choice.”

His eyes shift over to me without moving his head. “Since when do you know anything about my feelings?”

I shrug, crossing my arms. “I usually know what sadness looks like.”

Ty sighs. He rubs his temple slowly with his elegant ring finger. (What is with my finger fetish today?) “Ever since I was little, it was expected that I follow in the family tradition. Get perfect grades, go to a good university, go to an even better law school, become a lawyer, then finally take over the family practice. It’s what my mother did. It’s what I’m supposed to do.”

“Is that what you want?”

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” he scoffs.

I tilt my head towards him, but not too close to scare him away. “Well, if you could do what you want, what would you do?”

“I told you, it doesn’t mat-”

“Then pretend it does matter. What would you do for the rest of your life?”

Ty sinks further into the bench. It makes his stupid tweed jacket bunch up slightly, and he almost looks like a normal young adult. “Honestly, I just want to read books forever.”

I giggle quietly, and Ty glares at me with a now obvious flush in his cheeks. “Fuck off,” he snarls.

“I’m not laughing at you!” He doesn’t look convinced. “It’s just, when I first saw you, I never expected you to be a total bookworm. You seem too posh for that.” Ty snorts, keeping his arms crossed. He won’t meet my eyes. I lean closer, and he doesn’t back away. “Reading books forever sounds hellish to me, but it sounds like heaven for you. It’s a great idea. Why not do it?”

Ty’s glare somehow gets even more intense. His eyes are just slivers of beautiful grey. “Because I’m a responsible person, unlike you.”

The words hit me right in the gut. I scowl deeply at him. “That is beyond not okay. You don’t know me, you don’t know my life. So you don’t get to spew shit like that just because you’re pissed off. Got it?”

Honestly, I’m surprised how clear and articulate I’m being. A year with Dr. Margaret has made it a lot easier for me to stand up for myself in a meaningful way, not just with growls and punching. But still, it’s hard, and I did this so easily. I’ve really made progress.

Ty scowls back, but I don’t back down. I’ve always been good at standing my ground, thankfully. Slowly, Ty’s face falls and gets less angry. In fact, he looks a bit regretful. We slowly move apart again. He takes a few deep breaths before he finally speaks again.

“You’re right,” he says, “I’m sorry.”

“Good, apology accepted.” I lean my cheek onto my fist. “Seems both of us are having trouble with our futures.”

“Mine is secure.”

“But not happy.”

He rubs his lips together, like he’s chewing his words. “That doesn’t matter.”

“Why not? Why not do what you want instead?”

“Because I’ve already applied to law school!”

“Okay.” I put my back to the bench again, staring up at the sky through the trees. “Well, I’m nearly done with my maths and am about to start my teaching degrees. Then I've got a private school job lined up, but who knows? Maybe I’ll hate the job and quit and work at shitty customer service jobs for years until I decide to get my shit together and find an actually good teaching gig at a school I like.”

Ty’s dark brows furrow together. “That is extremely specific.”

I shrug, hoping my smirk doesn't say too much. “I don’t know, just a possibility.”

“Alright,” he snorts. “My life will be fine, it won’t go off the rails.”

He looks so sure and resolute. I don’t think I’m going to change his mind, and I don’t think it’s my job to. I can’t save everyone, something Dr. Margaret taught me. Plus I just met this guy. No matter how pretty he is, I don’t know him. (Wish I did.) Hopefully he can figure out his own shit.

“Okay. Your life, you can figure it all out.” I put my hands behind my head, leaning back, staring at the sky.

“Your life is going to be fine,” Ty says. “Agatha says that despite what you think, you’re smart. And I’m partial to agree. You have trouble with relationships, but who doesn’t? You’ve still got a good head on your shoulders. You’ll figure everything out too.”

I can feel my face turns bright red, and from the smirk on Ty’s face he can see it. I rub the back of my neck, trying to use my arm to hide my blush. “Y’know, I get why Agatha liked you. You’re weirdly nice and, well, really hot.”

Now it’s Ty’s turn to have his eyes go wide. He looks very cute. “Wow, you’re pretty forward for a straight guy.”

“Whoever said I was straight?” I smirk at him with one eyebrow raised. I hope I look confident and sexy and not just fucking weird.

“Oh.” His voice is almost a squeak. “I’m sorry I assumed.”

“S’alright, common mistake.” I look down at my stupid Nokia. “Wow, you’re beyond late for your class.”

Ty scoffs. “And who’s fault is that?”

“Okay, yeah, guilty as charged. You should probably get to it though. Need good grades for law school and all.”

“Yes, good point.” He stands up, and I follow, hands in my pockets. I both hate and love that Ty is a little taller than me. “But...it was nice to talk to you, Snow.”

“Feeling’s mutual, Ty. So, uh, see you around.”

I grin brightly, then turn around before I say something really stupid. I usually do in front of pretty people. Plus I need to see Agatha. That’s why I’m here, back in 2003. I’m not supposed to be chasing after a pretty guy who went to my uni ages ago. Even if he is like,  really pretty.

“Simon.” His voice makes me stop in my tracks and turn back.

“Yeah?”

Ty steps forward and holds out a scrap of lined paper. “Since you’re newly single, and now I know you’re not straight, give me a call sometime? If you’re up to it, that is.”

My brain completely short circuits. Blows a fuse. Maybe every fuse. I just stare at Ty with my mouth hanging open for a bit too long. Ty starts to look genuinely concerned. But thankfully the synapses start firing again and I shake it off.

“Um, y-yeah,” I say. “Yeah, I would like that.” I take the paper. “Uh, thank you.”

“You’re most welcome. I hope to see you around as well.”

I watch as he walks away, and I’m mesmerised by the way his hips swing. Fuck, he is so hot. And he likes  me. I honestly have no clue why but I’m not going to question it. I have to make sure to call him before I go back to 2020. But right now I have to find Agatha, so I carefully put the paper in the smallest pocket of my bag, then dash off towards Aggie’s dorm.

———————————————

I knock on the door softly, and there’s no answer at first. “Aggie?” I say. “I came here to say I’m sorry. I won’t yell, I promise.”

Still silence at first. I nearly leave, but then the sound of soft footsteps comes from under the door. The doorknob slowly turns and my pulse increases every second. Agatha is wearing her purple Watford lacrosse sweater, a pair of my trackies that I left behind last week, and blonde hair piled up in a bun. Her eyes are puffy and her cheeks are red. My stomach drops at the sight.

“What are you sorry for?” she asks, voice low and flat. She sounds more tired than angry. For some reason that hurts even more.

I take a deep breath. “I’m sorry for how I treated you, Ags. Our relationship didn’t fall apart for no reason. I didn’t pay attention to what you wanted and took you for granted. I was a terrible boyfriend. And I’m really, really sorry.” I start nervously pulling at my hair. “I-I’m not saying we should get back together. We weren’t happy, and you deserve someone who will put you first. But I still want to be your friend. You’re one of my first and best friends. I’m not sure how to do that, considering I was such an shit boyfriend, but can we figure it out? Together?”

Agatha rubs her lips together, taking slow deep breaths. Her fingers tap against the door one by one. I don’t know if I’m going to throw up or run or both. All are possible. But then Agatha nods slowly.

“Okay,” she sighs.

“Okay?”

“Let’s try to be friends again. I don’t want to lose you either.”

I grin ear to ear. “Okay, awesome, that’s great. I’m so glad you want to as well. I do love you, Ags, and I’m sorry I hurt you so much.”

“Apology accepted, Si, so you don’t need to do it anymore. Let’s just move forward, alright?”

“Alright, yeah, I’d like that.” I rub my neck and nervously gnaw at my lip. “Um, could I hug you? As a friend?”

She smiles softly. It’s been so long since I’ve seen her smile. Not just because I’m from the future, but I can’t remember the last time she smiled back when we were together. I hope I can make her smile more now.

“Yeah,” she says, “that would be nice.”

We both step forward and throw our arms around each other. I haven’t hugged Agatha in a long time either. Sure, we snogged and had sex, (though not very often honestly), but this is so much better. There’s no pressure or nerves. It feels normal. The most normal I’ve ever felt with her.

As we slowly part, we’re still smiling. “You,” Agatha pokes my chest, “need to study for your exam on Monday.”

I chuckle and nod, being silently thankful  I’m not doing that exam again. Once was more than enough. “Yeah, I know. This felt more important though. You’re more important.”

She blinks in confusion. I can’t blame her. Past me was always too focused on my work so that I could reach the happy ending I always wanted. Future me is figuring out that there is no happy ending. There’s just life, and I have to make it what I want, not just wait for happiness to fall into my lap. I haven’t got it down pat but I’m getting there. That’s more than good enough.

“Well, I’m definitely glad to hear that,” Agatha says. “Call me tomorrow. We’ll go get brunch, okay?”

I nod enthusiastically. “Sounds great.” The voice in the back of my head reminds me about the small fact of time travel, and that when I go back to 2015, past me is only going to remember bits and pieces of this day. “But, uh, studying may fry my brain. So could you maybe call instead? And I’ll call next time?”

Agatha sighs with exasperation, but she’s still smiling. “Alright, that’s a valid excuse.” She presses a small kiss to my cheek. It’s completely platonic, and it feels great. “See you later, Simon.”

“Yeah, definitely.” I hug her tight one more time before I go. She gives me a kind wave before closing her door. I’m grinning like a mad man as I walk down the hell. I did it, I saved my friendship with Agatha. I’m so damn happy. Plus I met Ty.

Oh right. I reach into my bookbag, feeling around for my notebook. My hand curls over the rings of the spine as I push open the stairwell door. And I instantly fall face first onto the dirty public school floor.

“Mr, Snow!” Ms. Petty, the nicest janitor in the entire school, possibly in the whole world, rushes to me. “Are you alright?”

“Uh, yeah, yeah,” I say. “I’m fine. Just clumsy.”

“Here, let me help.”

I take her hand and she hoists me to my feet. I still feel a bit dizzy, a small side effect of time travel I know all too well now. Ms. Petty keeps a hand on my back until I regain my bearings. “Alright, I’m good.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, don’t worry. I’ll be alright.”

“Okay, dearie.” She pats my shoulder. “Go get some rest, get your mind off work.”

“Right, yeah, work...”

Ebb gives me one last comforting pat and goes back to sweeping the hallway floor. I wave at her as I leave, hoping she doesn’t see the distress in my face. 

Fuck.

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AN: Chapter 2 will be posted within the next week, i.e whenever I'm well enough to edit it lol. See you all next time!