#anyway so i’ll be posting this once i’m fully finished writing it or on the last couple of chapters since i’ll be releasing it bit by bit

[seventh-district]

oh my god i can’t decide what to do with my time today

[floweredhalo]

.

[ilygetou]

๑ 2023 KINKTOBER | MINORS DNI. ๑

⋆｡°✩ details. will be posting a total of (almost) 13 fanfics throughout the weeks of october with one bonus/special piece. I’ll only be writing the main c/w here, once you get to the actual post you’ll get the whole c/w list so make sure to read that as well. Some works would be highly suggestive & won’t be suitable for some. read at your own discretion.

⋆｡°✩ notice. please be aware that i might not be able to finish every single piece by time but let’s hope that doesn’t happen. </3 main note is under the cut.

⋆｡°✩ taglist. fill this up if you’re tyna’ get tagged whenever i’m about to post a piece from this masterlist. scroll to the end if you only wanna be tagged in specific ones/pieces. must be 18+ to get tagged!

๑ THE FOLLOWING CONTENT YOU’RE ABOUT TO VIEW INCLUDES EXTREME DARK CONTENT THAT MIGHT BE TRIGGERING FOR SOME PEOPLE.๑

๑ PLEASE PROCEED WITH EXTREME CAUTION. ๑

NOTE: AAA HI GUYS!!! this year’s kinktober is going to be a bit different than last year’s kinktober, last time i did a “one kink + character” this year is going to be fully dark content fics with more than one kink, i’ll try & finish & post all of them right on time since i kinda gave up on last year’s kinktober–i’m hoping i’ll manage to post every single fic for this one–anyways!! i hope you guys like it!! (๑•́ ᎔ ก̀๑)

DARK CONTENT WARNING. PLEASE, READ THE TAGS UNDER EVERY LINK.

MET HER ON THE INTERNET. – Eren Jaeger.

c/w: noncon –> dubcon, online stalking, solo m! masturbation, lovesick! eren, possessive! eren, cheating, vaginal fingering, face/throat fucking, facial, brief after-care at the end.

HEROiN CHEERLEADER – Gojo satoru.

synopsis: You were like an addictive drug to satoru, he couldn’t get enough of you. Always coming back for more, that was until you told him that you had enough – that you two should stop messing around. You wanted to focus more on your cheerleading career while gojo satoru was furious with your sudden decision, he knew the whole “focusing on cheerleading” thing is a lie when he saw how swayed you were with the new captain of your cheerleading team. He won’t leave you alone until you willingly come back to him, you got him addicted to your taste so that’s all your fault.

c/w: college au, dubcon, voyeurism, male masturbation, jealous! satoru, degrading (like lots of it), satoru blames you for everything, unprotected sex, alcohol consumption, creampie.

PACKRUNNER BiTCH. – Ran Haitian.

synopsis: You were in it for the money. Why would you waste all your young years dating a thirty year old man? Let’s be serious here, you still have so much to do with your life rather than wasting it on an old guy but you need the money. But dating an old man just for money wasn’t that worth it either, that’s why the man you chose to use was a gang member – he’s old but is a part of an incredibly famous gang in your city. You knew he had more than money and that was; drugs. You were in it for the drugs & money! This whole acting in-love thing was fun until you were found out. Do you think Ran Haitian will forgive you for using him? He’s much more arrogant than that.

c/w: age gap (reader is 22 ran is 36), spanking (he uses his hands and a belt), choking, throat fucking, cum swallowing, unprotected sex, multiple (when i say multiple I mean many, numerous) creampies.

UGLY MAN? FUN PLAN! – Toji Fushiguro

synopsis: you found toji fushiguro ugly, he’s not your type and you’d rather die than date a guy like him. On the other hand toji found you gorgeous, it was love at first sight, he fell so hard for you he’s willing to do anything for your love. Toji confessed to you many times and they all ended up with heart breaking rejections. Toji is willing to try one more time and if you reject him again then that’s also alright, he has a nice plan in mind to (forcefully) make you his.

c/w: noncon, babytrapping, forced breeder! toji :<, slapping, sloppy makeout’s, lots of degrading, choking, low-key manipulative! Toji.

WEBGHOST – Rintarō Suna

synopsis: You stumbled across an abandoned hospital and decided to go explore it, alone. You were a huge fan of horror movies & loved the “exploring haunted places” concept, it’s nerve-racking because you never knew what to expect. Once you stepped foot into the old hospital, you felt a chill run past your spin. You hoped that you may run into blood-curdling stuff so you could have something to talk about for the next week or so — but you didn’t expect to run into an actual ghost. And it didn’t seem to want to leave you alone either.

c/w: ghost! suna (don’t ask how cause idk either), mentions of blood, spectrophilia, you feel it but you can’t see suna, hair pulling, creampie.

EViL NiGHT, LOVELY NiGHT! – Jean Kirstein.

synopsis: An infamous burglar lives in your city, he somehow managed to break into 120 homes in total and still didn’t get caught, he was known for stealing valuable objects–if he broke into your house and found nothing worth stealing then he’s going to flee and find another home to rob. He never restores to violence unless the house-victim tries anything against him, he’d immediately pull out his gun and shoot. Everyone was advised to keep their doors locked until they eventually catch the burglar. And tonight was no different, double checking that you had both your doors and windows locked before heading to sleep.

c/w: non con, coercion, somno, slight degrading, gun-fucking, facial, slapping, bondage, creampie per usual.

GRAVE ROBBERY. – Getō Suguru & Gojo satoru.

synopsis: You couldn’t escape them. From middle school to highschool and all the way to college. They were there. Following you everywhere, wherever you went–those two were always there, they made sure they were always there. You haven’t escaped their bullying and harassment for the past 9 years, gaining both enjoyment & entertainment by your reactions to their heinous acts towards you. Both Gojo satoru and Getō suguru loved you despite their horrible treatment towards you, they loved you.

c/w: bully! suguru bully! satoru, noncon, blackmailing, non con recording, hair pulling, threesomes, ass + pussy slapping, clit stimulation, dacryphilia, blowjob, handjob, facial, creampie.

TU4N Y<3R PH0N3 0F5 – Sanzu Haruchiyo.

synopsis: the feeling of someone watching your every move never left you, feeling as if there were eyes on you all the time. To the point you were uncomfortable to do almost everything. Eating? Sleeping? Changing? You couldn’t do anything without feeling two eyes inspecting your every move.

c/w: stalking, noncon, hints of misogyny, semi-public sex, forced/noncon breeding, slapping, virginity loss, mentions of blood and impregnation.

RUSSIAN ROULETTE. – ft. Yuushi Totsumoto.

from lady k and the sick man.

synopsis: Yuushi took you in cause’ you had nowhere else to go. you’ve been living with him for almost two years now and he barely knows anything about you. Not only that but he almost never heard you speak, he was okay with it at the beginning. Thinking you were just a little shy. But it’s been two years and he never heard your voice properly–there were a few occasions when yuushi could hear you speak but those would be barely audible mutters.

c/w: voice kink (auralism?), pervert! yuushi, peeping, breeding kink, cunnilingus, ear licking, size kink, man handling, squirting, overstimulation, creampie per usual.

WiTCHBLADES. – CHILDE/TARTAGLIA.

synopsis: (this takes place after the fontaine archon quest), childe who ended up thrown into jail because that god awful machine decided that he was guilty. And you, you ended up being his jail mate. You wanted nothing to do with childe but he’s a literal chatter box, he never shuts up. Finally, you snap back at him, scolding him and telling you guys are literally in a jail cell right now. Childe didn’t like that attitude of yours so he decided to fuck some manners into you.

c/w: noncon, forced breeder! childe, lots of misogyny, ass + pussy slapping, no prep, size kink, dacryphilia.

F0UR L3AF CL0V3R. — Aoi Todo.

synopsis: your boyfriend was either in his room playing games 24/7, at the gym, or sleeping. Never giving you proper attention until you grew desperate so what’s better than teasing him? until he gives you the attention you’re looking for. <3

c/w: read has big tits😓, dubcon just in case, kinda modern au?, gamer! todo, lots of teasing, boobjob, face fucking/blowjob, possessiveness, size kink, manhandling, pervert! todo, panty sniffing, sumata (“A Japanese sexual term in which the female rubs her labia majora against the male's penis, without actual penetration.”), facial, cum swallowing.

⋆｡°✩ 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋/𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒:

DEVIL ON MY BACK./ REPENT. – Getō Suguru.

synopsis: After watching a movie about the so-called game; Ouija board, with your friend Anna, You couldn’t help but grow more curious about it. After purchasing the game, you ran to your basement to try out; the first thing you tried to communicate with was the infamous devil; Getō suguru.

c/w: religious themes, ouija board, non con → dubcon, slapping, hair pulling, spitting, pussy + ass slapping, anal play, dacryphilia, overstimulation, v light somnophilia, manipulation, multiple creampies, non con creampie, lowkey monster fucking??, suguru has two dicks, face fucking, cum swallowing, guilt tripping kinda, very aggressive suguru, he is mentioned to have red eyes.

© ILYGETOU 2021-’23. All rights reserved. DO NOT steal, translate, or modify any of my works <3

[cozage]

Hello!! Love your writing beyond words.

Wondering could I have a fem!readerxzoro fic where they fully match each other's energy - them both being dumb, and the crew beggins teasing them daily for spending so much time together and being the same but they choosing to be fully delusional until they get in their heads? I'm aware you wrote simillar fic which is btw my fav of all time but not quite like this

Love ya 💗

Characters: female reader x Zoro Total word count: 900

Two People, One Mind

“Good workout,” Zoro complimented as he set his swords down on the ground. 

“Not too bad yourself,” you hummed. “I’m going to grab a snack. Be right back.”

“Get me-!”

“Onigiri!” you shouted, climbing down the ladder. “I know!”

You popped into the kitchen and smiled when you saw Sanji. 

“The usual post workout meal, my love?” he asked, already beginning to work on a fruit platter for you. 

“And for that pesky mosshead too, if you don’t mind!” You always felt obligated to insult Zoro when you were asking for something on his behalf. It felt like a fair trade off. 

“Only because you’re the one who asked,” Sanji said. 

You laughed as you exited the kitchen, choosing to bask in the sun on the deck instead. You sat with Nami, who scrunched her face at your arrival. 

“You look sweaty,” she said. “Why would you train so hard on such a beautiful day?”

You shrugged. “Have to get stronger. Always room to be better.”

The orange-haired girl groaned. “You and Zoro are almost too similar, you know. It’s scary sometimes.”

You raised an eyebrow at her. “Because I train during down time?”

“It’s more than just that, dummy.” She rolled her eyes and turned back to her magazine. “You’ll see it eventually. You guys are practically one person already.”

“You’re too damn confusing,” you grumbled. You started to ponder on her words, but Sanji called for you and broke you from your thoughts. 

You returned to the kitchen to find meals for both you and Zoro packaged away into a tote. You quickly snatched it up, said a quick thank you, and climbed back up to the crow’s nest. The deck of the Sunny was too loud and lively anyway. You preferred to be up in the tower, tucked away into solitude. 

Zoro seemed to feel the same way about the crow’s nest, but he was the one crew member you never got tired of. And he didn’t seem to mind you much either. Sometimes you could swear he was reading your mind. He knew when to talk, he knew when to be silent. He knew when it was time for a nap, and he knew when you wanted to fight. He knew when he could be in the room, and he knew when he needed to leave.

The two of you were just always on the same page, even without ever having to say a word. 

As you got to the top of the ladder, the hatch door opened. Even though you hadn’t said or indicated you were coming up, Zoro just seemed to sense your presence. You clamored up into the crow’s nest and the two of you sat on the floor, sharing the food that Sanji had made for you. 

You ate in silence, which was more than fine with you. You were still exhausted after your training session with the swordsman. Zoro seemed to feel the same way, or at least respected how you felt. 

Once the two of you were finished, you packed everything into the bag and handed it to Zoro. 

He raised an eyebrow. “I’m not-”

“I got the food, you take it back down.”

He frowned. “I don’t want to go down there.”

“Neither do I!” you said. “And I already went down there once! And I had to deal with the cook!”

“I’ll take it later.” He began to turn away, but you shoved the basket into his hands. 

“Take it now!”

He scowled at you, gritting his teeth in irritation. “You just want me to leave so you can take the couch to nap.”

Your cheeks flushed with red. That hadn’t been your primary intention, but you were definitely planning to jump on the couch once the door had closed. 

“No!” you squeaked, but you knew he had caught you. 

He gave you a devious grin and took off toward the couch. 

“Zoro!” you screamed, dropping the basket and sprinting after him. 

The two of you dove onto the couch, trying to compete for the comfiest resting place in the room.  

“You had it yesterday!” you yelled.

“And I’ll have it again today!” He gave a light chuckle and he tried to push you away, but you wrapped your arms around his torso and interlocked your fingers so he couldn’t pry you away. 

“Dammit woman!” he shouted, trying to push you away. “It’s my couch! Get off!”

“No way!” you giggled. “The only way I’m getting off is if you get off first!”

Zoro finally stopped fighting, realizing this was a battle he couldn’t easily win. With the both of you still and flush against each other, the couch could fit two people quite comfortably. 

“We could both sleep here,” Zoro muttered after a moment. 

You looked up at him in shock, surprised he would be so quick to compromise. The pink that was dusted across his cheeks caused color to rise in your face. 

“Sure,” you whispered, curling into his chest a little bit more. “You’re pretty sweaty and gross, but I think I’ll survive the stench.”

You could feel him stiffen, but when you smiled at your own joke, he relaxed again, letting out a soft chuckle of his own. 

“You’re gonna wake up with your nose in my armpit.” He closed his eyes, shifting slightly to get comfortable next to you. “And it’s going to be nobody’s fault but your own.”

“If you do that, you run the risk of me not sharing the couch again,” you teased, letting out a soft giggle. 

His arms wrapped around you, pulling you tighter into his chest. “Can’t have that. Gotta keep you close.”

You liked the idea of Zoro keeping you close. You could get used to this. 

[machveil]

Has anyone brought to you the question of what type of car Konig drives? I can’t see him fitting in anything but a giant truck, but also the idea of him in a little VW Bug makes me wheeze. (Of course there’s always the third option of motorcycle, but that might just be because motorcycles are hot af)

OKAY ANON— you activated my brain and had me dig through a 300+ asmr playlist I have on YT for a very specific video so I’m going on a tangent and a half about this haha

I’ll start with the smallest thought portion because this is going to be long…

Retired!König strikes me as owning a motorcycle, first and foremost. he’s always liked the way they look, so now with a hefty savings account and ample free time, he’s decided this can be his retirement project. he could buy a new motorcycle, really treat himself, but this guy is a working man! he buys a beat up, ‘well-loved’ bike (even the seller was surprised someone was actually buying it)

even though Retired!König definitely has enough cash saved up to make the process of fixing the bike up fast… he doesn’t. he wants this to be a pastime he can keep up, even it means he can’t ride the bike for a long time. he’d order parts individually every week or so - smaller parts, maybe in batches. he’ll grab a beer, put on some music, open his garage, and let the neighbors have a show of him dismantling and breathing new life into this motorcycle

all in all, I think it takes Retired!König a year, a year and a half, to fully finish the bike (of his own volition). by the end it’s beautiful - new sleek paint, high end parts, the works. …he could possibly be so into it that Retired!König opens an actual garage shop and fixes up vehicles (mechanic!König anyone?). yeah, he’s retired, but having a hobby that makes you money? can’t say no to that, Maus

ANYWAYS, on to the meat and potatoes of this post

so, my beautiful, oh so smart anon, thank you for sparking my brain into remembering THIS VIDEO. you CANNOT tell me this isn’t König coded, the entire thing SCREAMS König to me (actually, the entire channel does, but I can only fangirl so much)

König owning a Jeep scratches my brain right - I’m not knowledgeable on cars/trucks, so if you think there’s a better off-roading/camping vehicle I will believe you 100%. also, I’m sorry, I’m watching the video as I’m writing this - König would definitely take his fluffy, little kitty camping with him. the guy in the video has a dog, but my cat dad propaganda will never stop

it doesn’t matter where or how old König is, he loves camping and immersing himself in nature - he needs a vehicle that can keep up with him. it started as a kid where he’d flee into the local woods after school or on weekends for alone time. he convinced his mama that he’d be okay if he camped out in the woods, and after one dinky camping trip he was sold. every chance he gets he’s off in nature - hiking, camping, he tried caving once but he was too big :( he liked the entrance to the cave though. he adores bird watching, definitely has high end binoculars. he’d buy a camera too, but he’d rather enjoy nature in the moment rather than fumbling to take a photo. König thinks that some things don’t need to be captured in a photo, it’s okay just sitting down experiencing it, just remembering it

so König enjoys having a vehicle that lets him get away from people, he doesn’t mind driving til he’s almost running on empty. he’d gladly drive out into the middle of nowhere just to sit down and take in nature. always carries a box of trash bags in his truck so he can pick up litter along the road. and, since his vehicle is what allows him to travel, he takes very good care of it

back to his Jeep, he decks it out like the guy in the video. when König camps he treats it as a ‘how long can I stay out here’ ordeal, or up until he has to go home for obligations. so König tries to maximize space, I’ll say it every time - König has a place for everything, he’s an organized king✨

I’m not going to lie, I’m just going to say look at the guy’s Jeep in the video. they way he has it set up is just how I imagine König’s Jeep - this guy has a net attached to the ceiling for supplies, I could see König bungee cording a cooler in the back (completely organized), I just have so many thoughts on König camping this is too much haha

I’m trying to stay focused on the car aspect, but like… camping with König :( I guess I could make that another post if people want to see that

I’m sorry the latter half was so all over the place, I tried to keep it simple and edit it down, but I couldn’t anyways… he definitely owns some type of car that can handle camping. I’m partial to this specific Jeep though, call me biased lol

I looked up that VW Bug and I’m SCREAMING, this poor man haha! he’d be so hunched over, anon, his poor back. König definitely loves the aesthetic/look of the VW Bug, but he’d rather deep clean his home than sit in that (which says a lot). if you own a cute little car he’d offer to drive you everywhere. he claims that he’s being a gentleman, that you shouldn’t have to lift a finger, but in actuality he just doesn’t want to sit in that cramped little vehicle. he’s so sorry, Maus, let him make it up to you by being his passenger princess?

[kosmicdream]

The FATE of FEAST FOR A KING

.. and Nasty Red Dogs… 

And some other miscellaneous thoughts about comics, writing, and time.... AND ENDINGS...

============= 

As I’m approaching 10 years on FFAK and NRD is currently 5, I’ve been reflecting a lot on How far this journey with comics has taken me and how far I still have yet to go. For those unaware, my first webcomic was actually Eggshells, which started in 2011, but i only started posting pages publicly in 2013. It too is unfinished, but its planned for 7 chapters. (I’m currently working on chapter 5, which probably will come out early next year.) I have 9 ongoing comics I’m working on. NINE!! 3 of those are FFAK related. (FFAK, After Dinner Treat, and the prequel series “Help.”) It is so many comics though. And beyond that! I have two other stories I’ve been working on for the past few years in secret, one being Nice Blue Cats, which I might still draw as a comic someday.. As well as a series of “one shots” that is meant to be its own collection. Slugmom and “The Teacher & The Fairy” are part of these one shot collections. Which, uh, it was designed to help me practice writing short stories. Which TT&TF is now going to be three parts long, and roughly 300 pages. So I guess that’s short enough…? Ha.. laughs… Anyway, as I was saying.. Sometimes I’m sure, readers might wonder. “Do you ever feel overwhelmed, with so many projects Kosmic?” Yeah dude. I sure fucking do. I got 9 of them! That’s more than a full pokemon team of projects that are potentially a decade + of work. A couple of them already are a decade old/older at this point. (Praeymoon is actually one of my oldest-lasting projects, even tho its first chapter only finally released in 2023.. I first attempted to draw ch1 back in 2016, but was unable to finish it and scrapped the “full color” angle i was trying then. ) All my current ongoing comic projects are as follows: Feast for a King, Nasty Red Dogs, Eggshells, The Teacher & the Fairy, Replacer, The Eyes of Miasma, FFAK: After Dinner Treat, FFAK: Help, are all written. The only one which isnt fully written is Praeymoon, which I don’t mind because the way that story is organized is almost more of a sandbox-fantasy world of mini stories. I’ll be honest, if you havent heard of Replacer or The Eyes of Miasma, I don’t blame you- its not that i don’t like those stories. They just kind of are the “most neglected” comics yet I’m also kind of amazed they exist at all, like I DONT know how I found the time to draw over 100 pages for both of them. They also have fully written outlines and all things considered, are probably only going to be under 400-500 pages in length. But that’s still a decent amount of work there. Its been ten years since I more or less started making webcomics… and as I plan, and try to calculate all my projects for the next 10 years, my main priority at the moment is well.. Finishing all of these fucking stories one way or another. Its hard! I don’t know if I can as I put way too much on my plate. But at the same time like.. Whatever. I could easily drop most of them, if I felt inclined to - but I don’t. They are my library of work, and I’ve sort of made an artist oath to myself that I will see as many of them to the end as I can. I’m excited that three are very close to its end. (Nasty Red Dogs, The Teacher & the Fairy, and Eggshells.) After that well.. I’ll see what I can cross off my list next once I get there.. That’s still going to take years to get those done. But hopefully not too many. 

[Spoilers for potential LENGTHS of FFAK/NRD.. And other things.. I speak very transparently about writing and working on comics here AND including my thoughts on ENDINGS.. You’ve been warned]

I’m comfortable enough sharing that the fairy comic is 3 parts, Eggshells is 7 chapters, but when it comes to FFAK/NRD.. Its much harder to give an estimate, or if sharing those things will only be disappointing or annoying to hear about.. If you have ever been around me for more than 10 minutes, i am constantly talk about the “length left” on these projects a lot anyway. At night, i count them in my head. In the day, I write little lists as if I’ve forgotten the names of them.. They are MY LIST.

 But for those who do not know and wish to, NRD is likely going to end with 10 chapters. I have extended this in the past, so it could still change.. but it only really has gotten “longer” due to pacing of scenes rather than the actual content. And Honestly, it was paced out specifically to avoid this next chapter. Not that I didn’t want to draw it, its because i was Scared to do it.. Why? Because there’s cars I have to draw in it. And dogs. I have drawn those things before, at least once or twice. But I do not enjoy drawing cars or dogs. Dogs are okay now, but i hate that they have legs. Dont give me references, i have those. Its just how my brain is, with those fuckign legs and how there’s four of them. I know practice makes perfect. Or do-able. I have drawn amost 1000 pages of NRD, i dont remember how they bend and i’ve forgiven myself for knowing there’s just some things god cannot do, which is to give kosmic the ability to look at a dog leg and understand. Anyway. Because of this reason, somehow, finishing NRD with it only possibly being 4 more chapters, still feels harder than finishing ALL of FFAK - which (drumroll) might be .. only around 10 or 12 chapters left. Yes, you heard me- for the second AND third arc. 10 or 12 more. Will that also change? Probably!!!!!! Like, yes… its been 9 years and I’ve completed a lot more than just 10 chapters of comics in that time.. But wrapping up a story is way harder and I dont know what that’s like..yet! But i feel still confident that i will. I mean, i don’t really have any other choice than to experience it. I used to recoil and fall apart just emotionally contemplating finishing FFAK. my FUCKING baby. My joy. You mean that has to end?? NEVER. My attachment to it and the characters was incomparable to anything else I had done, and in my mind ever WILL make… (and that is still true.) But.. I’m okay with that now and I actually look forward to seeing how it could end up. Even if its bad! 

Its kind of weird to say, I just don’t really think it will be.. super good? Like.. it could be? I don’t know how readers will react. I dont even know how I feel about the whole thing.. I have felt so many feelings about this comic already, now I’m kind of.. Past it in a new stage. Zen like peace almost. There’s just.. so much that I wanted to PUT in FFAK and so much i could STILL put in. But I kind of just am okay with what i wrote, does that even make sense? The whole comic has felt like such a fluke to me, from the very start. And I managed to accidentally make so many great things in it I don’t actually understand sometimes. And my dreams for the comic has been nearly limitless. I couldn’t possibly contain all the feelings I’ve had over this story over the many years I have been making it, and all the incredible narrative outcomes I could see the characters going in.. the possibilities, the parallels.. The anime music videos..  I would NOT compare my writing style to GRRM, I haven’t read his books. but I can’t help but feel a bit like a weird baby version of him with the amount of cast members I have to push around and draw.. And I want to be clear. If FFAK was written as a book, it wouldn’t happen. I cannot write books. I do not think writing books is easier/faster than making comics, but sometimes it is hard to have to draw everyone. Point is, I understand the reality of a long-term comic project now, I have numbers and logs to prove it  and my range. And I’m fairly consistent, even in my low days. So.. in recent years my writing style has.. has changed to accommodate.. Those.. General Realities i’ve observed in myself. 

That’s why the second arc excites me. It has a lot of uhh, urgency that underlies it. You might have already noticed a change in the tone in chapter 16, which I’ve been working on for almost a year now. (I mean, I’ve been working on the written version for.. LOL.. much longer.) Maybe you haven’t! It could all just be from my own POV with how differently i feel that I delegate time to characters now. I did not start “writing” FFAK until chapter 10, and then i did not really start WRITING writing ffak until about.. Honestly, i want to say as late as 2019. It TOOK SO LONG you guys. I dont even know how many fucking thousands of pages of madness word documents I’ve got, with revision after revision and trying to list, contain, every possibly plotline… character backstory.. Blah blah blah.. Ive cut it down so much its impressive only to me. I don’t remember my lore anymore , and i love it. My readers probably know my lore better, and I don’t love it. Except when it benefits me. Then Its good. I would not describe myself as a RUTHLESS cut THROAT author, im actually too way sentimental to really let go of anyone. That’s why it took me so long to kill off Rock, but also because I wanted spoon to look really sexy and evil and that’s hard to do sometimes when I cant remember what half side he is. And when he was flipping around, I had to actually make a paper doll for him so i could TRY .. TRY to draw his arm on the correct side. Sometimes I didn’t. I just let it go if the drawing is good enough and i let it be a fun game for the readers to catch. But anyway, That’s why characters like Aeschylus are still around. Now that time has passed, I kind of regret it. Rome was right.. I dont need Aeschylus here and I’m mad he brought his friend Randall too. That being said, they’re some of my favorite characters in this arc even if they’re totally useless. In general, i have tried my best to not repeat all my writing sins and all my regrets of arc 1. I would not have been able to do this without the help of NRD to help get me to see that I can get attached and motivated to write new stories. When I hit my writing block in 2016/2017, it almost broke FFAK. FFAK still continued, but it also didn’t. But i was patient, and i worked through it.. And now I look forward to the ends of my comics, not because I want them to end but I’m very deeply excited for all the new opportunities my imagination to go to. I don’t know what that will be like. I don’t know how long it will still take me to get there, but I have it on [digital] paper and it does feel good to see that. Its affirming. I feel like i have a clear mission and I feel strong enough to really do it and commit to it. The second arc has barely started but in my heart I’ve made peace with the ending, whatever it might actually result as. 

Plus if I finish it and its so bad, I’m sure that will be inspiring in itself! People might actually write fanfics!! I think a lot of readers are NOT going to enjoy the ships, for one. The MEAN greedy part of me hopes they don’t. That’s the most ruthless part of my writing to me is the ship choices. Oh! My evil mind. I mean theres no possible way to please everyone, or even myself, but there is a possible way to displease a lot of people. Including myself. So that’s kind of the route I find myself drawn to. Why? Because it gets me out of the hole of like.. I dunno, being stuck. 

I used to write out a lot of big posts but over the years, I’ve kinda stopped. Mostly bc they were honestly really repetitive..or about lore that didn’t truly matter too much… That hasn’t really changed. This post is more or less “im still working on it, everyone! Just hang tight! Wow it’ll be a crazy wild ride” but it also is something I wanted to write to myself as words of encouragement. This has been a tough year. Like so tough that its hard to think about. But its very nice to feel like, i guess, my drive for my stories hasn’t gone anywhere. If anything, i really feel like i’ve gone through the mourning and ego death of “not being able to write a thing how you want” and now I’ve made total peace with it. Its just gonna be what it is, and I like that actually. When my life is tough, my comics at the moment serve as a place of hope for me - and assurance that I can survive through tough years. That’s the message they have ultimately given me, finished or not. And… I honestly don’t think of FFAK or NRD as my masterpieces or anything, but i know they might very well be the only stories people will know of when they think of me. If they think of me! So I wanna do a complete job with those. Rest assured, it’ll get there. I cant make big promises about all the comics I work on… even the bonus comics for FFAK, but at least those main two are my main priorities. That has not changed. THE FIRE is still in me. Even if FFAK took a like.. Mental.. 5 year hiatus its back baby. 

I’m about 30 pages in to my 50 page script for chapter 16, so I guess it’ll be around 300-400 pages more before its done. Things are picking up speed! So it could be less. I am also preparing for the monster that is the 7th nasty red dogs chapter. I cannot stress ENOUGH that this next chapter, I have put off since chapter 4. Yes, I’ve actually buffed the story out to be longer than it intended, just to avoid drawing it. I even put a horse guy in there, I never draw horses because those ALSO have legs but they’re worse than dog legs. And, its not that i didn’t want to draw this part of the comic! But I didn’t think i could do it. It intimidated me. It still does, but, I’m gonna do it already. I know chapters 8-10 will be hard too but like…eh… I know in my heart its gonna really be about 7 for me. It always has been about 7 to me.. 2024 will be a big year for my comics for sure, just because of that alone I think. Not only will I have chapter 16 done, as the first step of the 2nd arc and a new adventure of my apocalyptic wormy drama, I’ll be facing my fears of the dog variety. Its TIME. 

I’m so happy people have stuck around for my work, or shared it with others, even if they’re a strange mess. Its interesting to see, who comes and goes. I still enjoy refreshing my comments every morning when I wake up, and right before I go to bed. Its comforting.

My closing thoughts on this. I don’t HATE the ending of FFAK. I… like it! Its an ending. But I LOVE the ending to NRD. i think that ones legit good, i hope. With FFAK, part of me kinda hopes that turning up the pressure on myself of proceeding anyway will help the story. I don’t really know, or expect the ending to change though LOL…. Maybe i’ll come up with something better, but it will be too late so I cant do it or something, and then we can ALL write fanfics together of something else. Then sometimes I think about GUNNM and how the first ending was retconned but then last order was like? Basically the first ending again? I dont know actually, its hard to remember. THATS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN BTW. Also the ending is not everyone dies, even though that ending is fun and tempting. I didn’t do it, because end of evangelion already exists and its got a great song to go along with it too. YES it is also tempting to have someone go “WELL That was A FEAST.. For a KING” as the like final line, but I.. it wont wont. I prommy i take the ending seriously.

The reason I wanted to write all this, with webcomics, I think in general too people are so scared about writing their big comics that take 328523895235 years and the ending being bad. I see so many webcomics just, kinda die before the finale.. Which I totally understand, But I just.. Wanna show everyone that its much better and much more satisfying to just write the ending even if its a fucking disaster LOL. Because ultimately, its a webcomic. I don’t even know how to spell but people read mine! And so.. If theres anything I feel like i can promise and deliver to the world of the internet/my readers, is this big fucking disaster mess.. But it will end someday! And I’ll miss it. I hope readers will too, when that day comes (?) in probably another… 10 years…. idk.... BUT UNTIL THEN.. I hope you’ll enjoy the rest of chapter 16!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Kosmic Dream

[jadedxhearts]

2022 Law Birthday Event / Kinktober

Request no 4.

Originally posted in October 2022

Please note that this is an old work and isn't representative of my current writing skills!

Law could be quite crude if he so wished.

Maybe not around others, but it was generally known he was creepy and had a strange sense of humor. So while you shouldn’t have been surprised, you couldn’t help but be. The man had made comments which made you turn bright red with blush before. Whether it be totally alone and loudly spoken, or whispered into your ear to tease you while out.

Today was the former. You’d been sitting at the bed, trying to keep yourself entertained while he finished some late night work at his bedroom desk. He’d promised to reward you if you waited patiently for him.

He was about halfway through his work when he’d gotten an idea.

“y/n?” Law called to you, not turning away from his work.

“Yeah?” You answered, looking up, hopeful he’d announce that he was done.

“You’ve been good. I’m not quite done yet, but I want to reward you anyway.”

You frowned. “What do you mean?”

He slowly stood up from his chair, grabbing kikoku from where it leaned against his desk, and approached you.

“I’ll allow you have some fun while you wait, okay?”

He hovered over you, and you simply stared at him in confusion. “Do you mean-“

“I’ll let you play with yourself,” he continued.

“But, Law… it’s just not the same-“ you tried protesting.

“It will be the same though,” he said. “My ability shouldn’t be used for shit like this, but…”

“Law!” You gasped. “Are you serious… you’re gonna chop your dick off?!”

He rolled his eyes. “You act like I’m actually cutting it. I can stick it back on, dumbass.”

You averted your eyes, “I know, but…”

But your focus was brought back on him as he grabbed your hips, lifting you up just enough he could hook his fingers around your panties and slide them down your legs. Before you could even process his first action, he was sliding his fingers along your folds, brushing against your clit in hopes to slicken you up.

“Law!”

“Shh. I’m just helping you,” he teased.

You let out a soft whine, throwing your head back as he began rubbing his thumb against your soft bud of nerves.

But then he pulled away, which caused you to whine in annoyance.

“Stop whining,” he snapped. “I can’t touch you and get it at the same time.”

So you waited, looking up at him in anticipation. He pulled the katana out of its sheath, setting the sheath on the ground next to the bed. With his free hand, you watched as he unbuckled his jeans and slid them down just enough that his cock was fully out.

“Room.”

The blue orb enveloped the area around him, and you weren’t quite sure if you were staring in horror or being turned on even more as he swung the katana in a downward motion, his entire length then falling into his left hand.

He held it out to you. But you continued staring at him. Definitely in horror. This was fucking weird.

“Are you gonna take it or not?” He asked, slightly annoyed.

You simply closed your mouth and took it from him, literally holding his cock in your bare lap, looking down at it. You could not believe this was real.

“I’m going to keep working. Do what you want as long as it’s not something weird.” He told you, pulling his jeans back up.

“Law, me just holding it detached from you is fucking weird.”

The man rolled his eyes once again before heading back to his desk, sitting down and resuming his work like nothing had even happened. Like you weren’t holding his cock in your hands. The way it twitched was just… so strange.

Well, you weren’t just gonna sit there and keep looking. So you got up onto your knees and crawled to lay on your back, against the pillows. You spread your legs open, brushing it over your cunt.

It was embarrassing how evident it was that you were turned on from the way your juices stuck to his cock in wet strings. He was going to tease you about this forever.

But at the same time, of fucking course nobody but the surgeon of death’s girlfriend would find this hot. It was right up his alley of a fucked up joke.

Pulling it away from your lower body, you brought it up to your lips, giving his tip a small kiss. It twitched, again.

It seemed like Law was fine with this, the way he just kept on working… so you pressed your tongue on the tip, licking up before wrapping your lips around him.

You could’ve sworn you heard him hiss.

You continued working it with your mouth, trying to get his cock wet enough with your spit that you could fuck yourself with it.

As you continued holding it with one hand, you moved your other one down to touch yourself. You were practically dripping now. You rubbed small circles into your clit, letting out a couple soft moans around his cock.

“Shit, y/n-ya-“

Law’s voice startled you. You looked over to see him with one hand on his thigh, fingers digging into the skin underneath his jeans. His other hand was laid against the desk in a tight fist. How was he supposed to get work done? Had he even thought this through fully?

Feeling satisfied with the wetness of both parts, you pulled his cock out of your mouth and rubbed it against your folds, your spit combining with your wet cunt’s juices to create a sort-of lubricant.

You moved the tip to be lined up with your throbbing hole, gently pushing it inside. He was hardly an inch inside of you, but you couldn’t help but let out a moan, your cunt clamping down on him as you continued to slide the rest of his length inside yourself.

“F-fuck, Law, you’re so… big, mmm.”

Your eyes were closed tight, so you couldn’t look over to see his reaction. But you could hear him hiss as you slid his cock in, and now you heard him letting out shuddered, shaky breaths.

You started moving his cock in and out, slowly increasing the speed of which you fucked yourself with it.

As your hand began moving faster, you started moaning louder, but then you found his member was becoming even more wet, your fingers slipping as you tried to keep up the fast pace.

Before you could even realize it was happening, your fingers slipped away and off his cock as you pushed it inside, and you opened your eyes to stare down in horror. Had you… gotten his cock stuck inside yourself?

“Law…”

“Wh-what?” He groaned.

“I… it’s stuck.”

“Stuck?” He questioned, voice dark. Were you playing some stupid prank on him? “Really now, y/n. That’s some bullshit, keep moving.”

“N-no. Law, I’m serious… it got too wet and my fingers slipped-“

Frustrated, he spun his chair around to see it was in fact no longer in your hands. Letting out an annoyed sigh, Law moved his hand up.

“Room.”

The blue orb was now surrounding you and him. Was he gonna switch something out with it?! Then you’d just have another object stuck-

You watched as he pulled his index and middle finger back, which pulled his member out without him even touching it.

Then he motioned forward, and it slammed back inside of you. You let out a scream, throwing your head back into the pillows.

He continued doing this, thrusting his cock in and out of you with just a flick of his fingers. He sped his motions up, in turn moving his cock into you at a faster speed, a speed that quickly turned inhumanly possible.

You cried out loudly as his cock relentlessly slamming in and out, your cunt aching as you instantly came, but he didn’t stop. He was going to do this until he came, probably.

Your moans turned into screams of pleasure as he continued. His hand that wasn’t controlling his member was gripping at his thigh, your screams drowning out his groans.

“Law, fuck! I, I can’t…”

“Can’t what?” He growled, too engrossed in his own pleasure to really care about overstimulating you.

“Baby, it’s too much! I, I’m-“

You let out probably the loudest moan you’d ever managed to make as you promptly began squirting, juices rushing out of your cunt and spilling onto the bed sheets underneath you.

Your cries of it being too much turned into messy babbling and loud moans as he continued thrusting in and out of you at a relentless, borderline painful pace. However, the pleasure you felt as you continued cumming outweighed the slight pain immensely.

“Shit, y/n. You’re being so good, I, fuck- can’t believe you’re squirting from this, huh? You’re ruining our bedsheets, cause you’re so turned on-“ he let out a loud hiss,” “from using me as your toy, hm? You’re such a dirty slut.”

“Law!” You screamed his name again, begging for him to stop at this point.

As soon as you did so, your boyfriend let out a moan, which was rare for him, and came inside you. His hot cum kept spilling into you, and you noticed his cock wasn’t moving at all anymore. It was simply sheathed inside you.

You opened your eyes to see Law on his knees, shaking and eyes dark as he calmed down.

“Shit. That was… more intense that I had thought it would be,” he mumbled, trying to regain his composure.

But you were exhausted, and simply let yourself fully fall back into the bed, closing your eyes and trying to steady out your breathing.

You felt his cock being slid out of your cunt, and heard the sound of his jeans unbuckling. He must’ve been reattaching himself.

When you opened your eyes, Law was at your side, leaning against the bed. He was staring at the mess between your legs.

You looked down to see a large stain between your legs, probably from you squirting. Right beneath the opening to your cunt was Law’s cum, spilling out from you. From what you could tell, he’d come a lot.

“Didn’t… know you… thought squirting was so… hot,” you said, out of breath from his intense fucking.

“Neither did I,” Law responded. “And now we have to change out the fucking sheets.”

You breathlessly giggled.

You felt Law lifting you up, sliding your panties back on for you. He carried you over to his desk chair, so you could rest at least a little while he changed the bed sheets.

When he was done, he’d changed into a pair of sweatpants and brought you back to the bed, laying down with you.

“Can’t believe you got my damn cock stuck inside of you.”

“Sh-shut up… it was slippery.”

“Whatever. At least now I know I can keep you filled up without having to physically keep myself inside.”

Your eyes went wide at his suggestion. Yet another one of his crude comments that left you blushing.

[heroictoonz]

king I've been putting off a rewatch of s15-17 for ages do u think its worth it

My instinct is so say no save yourself but like jokes aside I think that’s up to you like, I always said that they gave the RvBs a “bad ending” and that they ruined Tucker’s character post Chorus however, that was back when season 16 was literally first coming out

Flash back here but so when s16 was coming out I was just getting more and more upset with the writing of the show especially and honestly almost specifically Tucker. Somewhere near the end of s16 I stopped watching (didn’t even finish the season) and then after a bit I heard that the next season was gonna revolve around whole new characters

Now this, I only recently learned was weird miscommunication. See I’m trash ass shit at keeping up with news of shit even shit that I like so for the longest time I thought the story of this group I’ve been following since I was a teenager ended at s16 which KILLED me inside so I swore off the rest of the show and vowed to never watch it. Instead I mostly just rewatched Chorus or s1-s13 if I wanted to rewatch the “whole” show. Basically just watching till the end of Chorus and stopping. Every time I tried to go rewatch s15 to mmmaybe finish the show I kept remember how bad things got and kept running away

I’m gonna give some vague spoilers from here on out but it’s cause I do genuinely wanna talk about how I feel having literally only a few minutes ago finished s16 and s17 for the first time

I decided to finish RvB LITERALLY last night like no joke and it’s cause I saw spoilers out of context for s19 and I was like fuck it I need to see what the hell that is show is over anyways might as well finish it. So I am doing that now

I rewatched/finished s16 and fucking hated it. The good parts were Wash being cute and silly and my favorite guy ever of all time and forever. There’s also Grif and this character named Huggins they’re like on god one of my new brotps of all time damn RvB writes some good ass season specific supporting cast cause holy shit man. Also! I liked that Kai was in it! I enjoy Kai so so so so so much! I’ve always wanted more of her in the show! UNFORTUNATELY!

Tucker is so hard to watch. It’s so honest to god painful to watch. Maybe that’s what they were going for I don’t know. But, having now seen season 17 I get what they were TRYING to do I just don’t fully like how they did it.

In s17 Tucker admits to himself that the reason why in s16 he was acting so weird and gross and toxic masculinity “I have to have the biggest and most talented dong in the room at all times or I’ll kms” character ever is cause he was trying to be a leader

It’s sounds stupid and personally I think it IS stupid but now that I know what they were TRYING to write it makes these post Chorus seasons more bearable.

Basically, Tucker spent all that time in Chorus forced to be a leader. Once he finally got comfortable in the position of one Chorus no longer needed them. He wanted to keep being a leader keep feeling like a leader and it went to his head. He tried acting cool and tough and macho cause that’s what he thought a leader was and he says this! Out loud he admits all this to himself in s17! And honestly? That’s SUCH a good fucking concept it’s super fucking interesting and I really dig it plus with Tucker FAILING at being the leader it gave Donut well deserved character growth. I’ve always hated how sidelined Donut got compared to the others cause I’ve always liked him but s17 is definitely Donut’s season and to see him finally get screen time and respect and also have genuine moments of connection with the others was honestly really fucking awesome

So, do I like s16? God no. Do I recommend it watching it? Hard to say. You have to watch it if you wanna finish the show. Is finishing the show worth it? Honestly I dunno yet I haven’t seen 18 or 19 so it’s to be seen rn. But s17 where not perfect was definitely better than 16 and gave better insight on what they were trying to do. I don’t like the execution I don’t think it was as done very well but I like the ideas I like what they were attempting

S15 I admittedly do not fucking remember at all cause again it’s not a season I’ve rewatched more than maybe twice cause I kept stopping cause I just did not wanna deal with what I knew was coming. And I know me I know myself I know if I tried rewatching the show from the start or even s15 in an attempt to finish it I’d ever fucking do it so instead I just started from s16 and went forward

I don’t remember out right hating s15 but similar to the above I think there were good ideas and not all of them were perfectly done in writing. Also there’s this like really cool interesting thing that is about Tucker that then ends up being a stupid child support payment joke and that sucks so much it makes me so burningly livid I don’t even have a joke here it just makes me mad

But! It brings in the concept of other reds and blues other soldiers that were left in the rubbles of project freelancer which is super interesting again I think they coulda done more with specific parts of it and the “Tucker doesn’t pay child support for the buncha kids he fucked into existence” joke sucks especially when they CONSTANTLY SHOW HIM AS A VERY DOTING AND LOVING FATHER it’s fine I’m not mad I’m not bitter I promise

But uh yeah honestly if you like the show a lot I say watch it even if it sucks. Some of my biggest special interests are GARBAGE shows with writing so bad it makes me wanna commit actual arson. But, I love the characters I love the settings and I love what could have been maybe that’s why I always keep sticking around in stuff like this lol even if it sucks I like to imagine what could make it better cause I love it! And if I didn’t love it I wouldn’t care to put as much energy into wanting it to be better as I do! That’s the same with RvB! I wish it was better I wish SSOOOO BADLY that it was better but it’s cause I love it so fucking much not out of any sort of hate if that makes sense?

Idk tldr it’s up to you and you might suffer a bit but if you love the show I say go for it

Aaaand it’s 2am and I read ur ask wrong I thought that said “watch” not “rewatch” but? Points still stand I’m the kinda person that will rewatch even the seasons I hate to remember why I like the ones I love (I’m looking at you Ninjago season 3 you hot fucking garbage that I’ve sadly seen more times than I would like)

[somany-fandoms-solittle-time]

“What’s so Special About the Moon?”

Jamil Viper x MC(insert character Mac)

(Ch. 1) – Ch. 2 – Ch. 3 – Ch. 4 – Next – Previous

This was originally supposed to be, like, a single chapter hurt/comfort before my OC (Mac) and Jamil as a song fic where they berate him and then sing a song referencing the moon… but then I had feelings and it’s becoming a more in depth character study between the two. Don’t worry! By the end of this mini series, there will be song lyrics and more sappiness… it’s just now that I’ve finished both Book 4 and Book 5, I need to reorganize the events and specific and whatnot. Some quick housekeeping as always: I tried to make Jamil to encompass both his dark & mysterious villain persona ALONG WITH him practically being a fucking child so that’s why I wrote him like *this* so yeah… I’m moving around the timeline so that Yuu/MC (aka Mac) has the weekend to GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER LOL, Mac is about 19-20 (haven’t decided yet) and uses mixed pronouns as a heads up, Ch. 2 has a 1st draft written put still needs to be typed up and edited. If you see a typo NO YOU DIDN’T!!! This one of my first times trying a different writing doc that isn’t Google (cuz fuck Google) and it’s a little weird to get used to and edit stuff. It’s beta-d in the sense that licking the spatula while your mom bakes cookies and claiming that you helped… literally only a few paragraphs were checked over y’all.

Quick shout-out to @krenenbaker and @twst-beam for inspiring my writing thus far (and sorry for taking so long to post this lol!)

I’ll be releasing some type of overview of my OC eventually, but take these snippets as they go while I fall back in love with writing. You’ll meet Mac in full when xey are good and ready… anyway, please enjoy Chapter 1 of my new fanfiction, “What’s So Special About the Moon?”

“Here. You can use this one,” Jamil directed towards the plain (compared to the rest of the dorm) laundry… mat? There were several industrial sized washer and dryers, a couple moderate-sized one’s that would fit a regular apartment complex, and a long wall designated area for hand washed items. Jamil was keeping the door prompt open with his hips; his slight frown of concentration and the flick of his Magic Pen were the only signs of the current spell he had going. Turning around, MC was slightly surprised by the massive piles of fabric that was being corralled in via multiple a massive sheet tied to multiple brooms. They still couldn’t fully grasp the concept (and power) of magic and seeing it so casually performed on a day-to-day basis was kinda daunting.

“Thanks again for letting us use the space along with showing me how to properly clean all these fancy duds and whatnot.” the Ramshackle Perfect awkwardly trailed off. Their focus was split between stealing peaks at the Scarabia Vice Warden, not wanting to bother the already busy Sophomore, and surveying over the dusty, damaged antique pieces the two stripped from the halls of the previously abandoned dorm. Rugs, carpets, curtains, furniture covers (in varying state of disrepair) dulled of their once rich and vibrant color. The patterns were a mix of stuffy academia and the quiet comfort of a grandparents cottage living room. Both extravagant, yet understated. It’s a style lost to time, but not quite a revived ancient aesthetic.

At this point MC was fully lost in thought; they desperately needed to clean, fix, organize and decorate the dorm in preparation to host so many guests. Even with his limited memories, they had a feeling they’d never hear the end of it from his parents.

“Don’t worry about it much.” Jamil said, interrupting their musings. “Honestly, I’m doing this as much for myself as I am helping you.

With a flick of his wrist, Jamil organized the seemingly random crumbled piles of fabric by condition, color and use. His movements while cleaning were quick, smart, and efficient-- all while patiently showing Mac which order to start in along with the best way to clean them.

“Ya’ know…” MC broke the relative quietness between the two workers, “Even with everything thing that happened over break, I understand why Kalim still trusts you; I almost can believe that you’re not that bad of a guy.” Jamil gave xem a startled (and exasperated) look, but they continued before he could respond: “I fail to see how helping the person who ruined your ‘world domination’ plans—”

“They were hardly World Domination level!” He quickly snapped. His embarrassment led to him tugging his hood further down his face, teeth slightly clenched, and dilated eyes as MC continued listing all the ways he’s “helped” them out.

The magic-less Perfect laughed to themselves the more conflicting emotions flew across Jamil’s face. Eventually those same emotions were compressed behind a cold, smooth mask. Limestone slabs and stiff mud brick walls were swiftly constructed between the two working-class students. Something about it didn’t sit right with Mac.

“Hey I’m not saying what you pulled wasn’t a dick move! But you’re also not the first overly-traumatized teen boy I’ve had to deal with… and between what you’ve said about yourself, plus thing’s I’ve heard and seen, I’m starting to think you’re not nearly as complicated as you think you are.” The longer they argued *to* him, the more Jamil’s mask began to crack; there were a few holes in his walls he didn’t account for. Xe’s a tad more observant than I remember, but weirdly just as persistent, Jamil internally rolled his eyes.

“I could still change my mind and send you back to deal with the Pomefiore Wrath(tm),” He mumbled while gracefully lugging the newly cleaned (and damp) furniture coverings into an empty drier. Despite his harsh threat, MC still remembered him assuring the other this laundry room was only ever used by him after Kalim’s parties.

The large machines and larger working space was specifically added for the servant to clean and repair any decor or Asim Family Treasures when Kalim’s recklessness caused a larger mess than usual. This meant that Mac and Grim (who was originally supposed to be helping… where the hell was he anyway?) could do as many loads needed without worry. On top of the borrowed space, the Housewarden himself had cheerily has assured them, his Oasis Maker would replace all the water used ten times over!

Mac’s thoughts were interrupted once again as Jamil relented, “I told you, I’m doing this to help me.” After receiving an unconvinced eyebrow raise, Jamil began to explain, “Kalim might’ve announced us as equals but I still have a job to do. If he got sick while spending Allah knows how long in a dusty, dirty, shabby condemned building like Ramshackle I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“It’s not nearly that bad anymore!” the sole-human resident of said dorm argued, but was quickly shut up with a tired gesture towards the untouched loads of laundry left to be done.

“On top of that,” Jamil smirked “Even a common peasant like myself wouldn’t sleep in a rundown garbage heap if I can help it.” His smirk slowly slide off his face from his face as the insulted Perfect almost ripped the handful of soapy doilies, that they were previously scrubbing by hand, as xey prepared a retaliation.

“OK, first of all! This whole Inferior-Superior shtick isn’t going to prove your point. If I’m being totally honest, I’m pretty used to the bratty, arrogant attitude of teenagers by now (even if I wasn’t Leona is a thousand times worse).” They turned their full body to face the 2nd year boy before continuing the assault. “Secondly, even just doing the bare minimum would’ve been fine, considering I’ve slowly been deep cleaning them place room by room. This is just last minute cleaning considering I wasn’t expected to host six extra people in two days.”

The shock of Mac’s care and attention to detail couldn’t win over Jamil’s newfound freedom to be right… and sassy while doing it. “Keep in mind you wouldn’t be the only one having to deal with Vil. His expectations are much higher than my personal standards—”

“Getting there!” MC interrupted again. “It’s not like Vil and whoever else couldn’t magic things better or get things done over at Pomefiore.” However, their fire started to die down with their obvious lack of understanding of magic. Not that Xeir level of intellect ever stopped them from talking out of their ass during debates… even if this wasn’t exactly shaping up to be anything like Debate Club back home.

“Not the point!” Mac built back their steam after thoughtlessly shaking off any internal distractions. “Third of all,” Jamil groaned not-so-quietly, “third of all, you didn’t have to show me how to do it. Nor did you have to continue helping me. There’s only so much I could pay you back in favors and it’s not like you’ll make back the time and energy spent. You’re obviously a bit of a piece of shit but I don’t totally blame…”

Jamil suddenly gave Mac his full attention. He smoothed any emotional tells from his face and readied himself to actively dissect what ever left xeir mouth and any messages in between the lines. The silence prompted Mac to drip extra sincerity as they begin to ramble without thinking.

“… I get why you did what you did. You’re not totally forgiven, but it’s not like I’ll hold a grudge over you forever. Whenever I joke about Winter Break I thought you knew it was just that: a joke.”

The two stared at one another for a few beats. Jamil betrayed nothing that he was thinking, but Mac could practically feel the exasperation flooding off of him in great waves. The disbelief pushing and pulling off of him, despite remaining stone cold to zeir admission. So, of course, they continued with slight for fever:

“Yeah, okay, you held us all prisoner, enslaved via hypnosis your entire dorm, and nearly killed multiple students. Twice.” Mac cringed at their own blunt statement, “… But why would you go as far as you did, if you didn’t care! What your parents, and more specifically your culture, put you through wasn’t fair—but you obviously still love and cherish them!”

At this, he seemed to get even more guarded. It felt patronizing to be hold how he supposedly felt or why he should feel a specific way. They hadn’t been there. They hadn’t grown up as a Viper in the Desert, constantly reminded by Kalim’s Mirage of wealth what he could never have. They didn’t know the FIRST thing about the Scalding Sands—!

“… How do you know anything about my parents? Did Kalim--?!” He choked out infuriated at the mere implication.

“Relax Viper! It’s all in the Secret of The Ooze™”

“What?”

“Never mind…”

The usual absurdity of MC’s references (much to xeir chagrin that no one seemed to understand them) Jamil allowed himself a shadow of a smirk. Right about now they’d drop what they were saying and instead empathize with him over terrible bosses. They’d both fall back into a familiar pattern of quiet understanding while making playful small talk; maybe Xe’d make a remark over how “hellish” the desert temperature is and moan about being “a poor Northern forced into the sun” before dragging them both off to grab an abominably sweet drink that Kalim would still put sugar in. Xe had always been could at mediating with the other students at NCR.

However, they didn’t drop it. They continued to push him… especially when they realized that he expected the conversation to have ended and started to relax. Xey pushed and pushed and pushed. Finally, they had circled back to him rebelling from his status.

“What? You think I’d be Happier staying a lowly servant?! I’d rather cut my own tongue out than remain bending to Kalim’s will for the rest of my days.” He huffed, still not stopping his assault on the pile of laundry in front of him.

A frustrated sigh left Mac as Xey tried to get their point across, “THAT’S NOT WHAT I’M SAYING!… Obviously, you don’t love being forced into child labor or having to pretend to be something you’re not, but that doesn’t mean you’re totally being honest with yourself either. Rebelling adolescents often do a complete 180 of who they once presented as in an extreme action to feel validated.”

Jamil scoffed in indignation at the impromptu therapy session he’d been forced into.

“Just because you were forced to lie sometimes as ‘Servant Jamil’ doesn’t mean those memories or feelings weren’t authentic!”

“My Childhood, my Pride, my ENTIRE LIFE was stolen from me before I could even open my eyes, Mac! Who could cherish that sort of future?”

“I’m not disputing that! I’m not trying, in any way, to imply that what you went through didn’t fucking suck. But just because you’ve started saying the quiet part out loud doesn’t mean you’re being totally honest either. Switching one mask for another just means nothing has changed but your ability to bitch about-it to the kid you literally Grew Up With, Jamil.” A tired resignation was growing in their eyes as they headed to the end of xeir rant.

It was clear MC was starting to speak in circles and xey weren’t going to be able to get through to them. A heavy weight sunk deep in their chest, slowly sliding to xeir stomach the more he misunderstood the magic-less student. I saw him drown in the depths of his own helplessness and self-pity, but even after he’s been pulled out it’s like he can’t help but dive back in for a swim. It was a suffocating thought while Mac watched as Jamil once again went stone-faced… Like what he was about to say would be his final shield before walking away. It’s a shame that the Ramshackle Resident had become too used to throwing bombs over walls and blowing verbal shields to smithereens after months of being stuck in Twisted Wonderland.

“I’m not sugarcoating or bowing down to anyone anymore. I won’t bite my tongue. I won’t put on a Happy Face to Kalim’s idiotic, half-thought out ideas again. I’m slowly gaining my freedom, something you clearly don’t understand. Just because you’re as blind as he is doesn’t mean anything! What more could you want from me?!” He hissed his final insult before finally stepping away from his station. Not leaving the room, he aggressively got himself a cup of water from one of the sink and gulped the unfiltered water down.

“Just because you’re not hiding your bitter, knee-jerk reaction from an unfair world doesn’t mean you aren’t still hiding away and lying about your more vulnerable emotions.” Mac whispered in an emotionless tone. “Cutting a part of your past off and pretending it was never there is doing yourself a disservice and lying to those that still care about you… And there sure-as-shit isn’t much that I hate more than a Fucking Liar.”

. . . . . .

The lacy doilies sat in a sudsy basin, left forgotten as the two students stood a mere paces from each other—both maintaining an uncomfortably intense eye contact. The sloshing thump of the washers and stirring hum of driers harmonizing were the only song to accompany the two’s stare down. A short hiccup as Mac took a drawn out breath was the only reaction between the two of them. The combined heat of Scarabia’s sun (barely past 10am) and the humidity of continued use of machinery didn’t help the suffocating air in the wide laundry room. Not to mention the loud, stifling silence to boot.

MC usually held back such honest commentary (not that they weren’t blunt) unless Xe deemed it necessary: think high stakes and a sense of urgent drama. But something about Jamil and Kalim’s situation reminded them of himself. The two’s intertwined dance of class, history, loyalty and betrayal, friendship and loss, and such overwhelming guilt reminded the dimension hoping stranger of home. Whatever that meant.

But this was no time to get lost in their own problems and Trauma’s. They’d went too far (again) and that means xey should be the bigger person (again) and deescalate the situation before he hated them (AGAIN). Which means, MC would be the one to break the silence and run away again.

“Ya’ know what? Grim’s probably burned the school down already. Don’t worry about,” Ze gestured blindly to the numerous stations they’d started, “this mess. I’ll rope my little Rat Gremlin and the Freshies into finishing this up. Hell, I could probably convince Rugs to pitch in for lunch or something. Bully the Music Club with helping in exchange of random sheet music I still remember from home.”

Their rambles became more spastic as they noticed Mr. Sugar, Spice and Not-So-Nice break out of his own trance and try to reply. “Seriously! Just enjoy the break… Not that it’s my place or responsibility to be butting in anyway. I will be back in, like, 10 minutes and from here-on-out minding my own damn business. Sorry. Whatever. See you sometime after Sunday, I guess?” Their entire monoluge Mac was slowly backing out of the room before turning around in xeir spot and just short of sprinting their way out of the dorm. A few passerby Scarabia students stopped to eavesdrop on xeir muttering… watch them leave.

Without getting a word in Jamil stood unmoving, watching the Ramshackle Perfect leave swifter than the desert wind shifting the dunes. Almost on auto-pilot, he simply left to go back to his room and do as he was told; enjoy his break. His day off. The day he could do what he liked and didn’t necessarily have to prioritize work. A day he spent working to help and assist the pitiful, magic-less loser that was dropped-kicked into another reality and forced to play nice with a University filled with overpowered and hormonal teenagers while having no way home… And in return was insulted, psychoanalyzed, and thrown aside before he could get a word in edgewise.

“Son of a STREET RAT!!!!!” It was clear he’d need a few hours to calm down before he could even think of trying to enjoy the rest of his Saturday off.

[pizza-is-my-buziness]

Fictober Prompt Day Ten! Prompt: "It's okay, I'm here now."

Pairing: Ashley Graham/Leon S. Kennedy (Resident Evil)

Read below!

(and yes I am posting this here because I do not have the energy to come up with a title. And I wanted so badly to do something funny with this but my brain refused to let me avoid the post RE4 hurt/comfort moments that I could probably write about forever)

“You know, I really feel like all those rom coms have lied to me.”

Leon looks at her like he thinks she might’ve fully lost it. Like after everything -the monsters, the kidnapping, the plagas, the flecks of blood that she’d managed to wipe from her cheeks along with seaspray- it’s the sight of a completely normal, comfortable hotel room that finally does her in.

Which, fair. 

Ashley can’t blame him for thinking the worse, not after everything. It’s all pressing at the back of her mind like whispers from another room, promising that she could hear all the more clearly if she only pressed her ear to a closed door and held her breath. But Ashley is just fine with letting them lurk in the back of her mind for now.

Or, you know…forever. 

Because what does she need to relive all those things for? Isn’t it enough that she’s got blood and grime and sweat sticking to her like a second skin that she’ll never fully be able to shed? 

“Um.” Leon unbuckles the tactical belt that surely has to be as grimy as the rest of him, and sets it gently on the desk in the corner. 

“It’s…” Ashley points, feeling her cheeks color, and Jesus Christ Graham what the hell. She should’ve just kept her mouth shut. “There’s two beds.” 

She swears she can hear Leon mentally counting the people in the room.

Quickly, Ashley shakes her head. “You know what, it’s totally stupid.” She waves a hand, hoping that she’s not as red as she feels. “You know how there’s always just one bed in those types of movies and like Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock always have to share or something and I’m just going to shut up now.”

Leon cracks something of a smile and shakes his head. His hair is dirty and stringy from sweat and rainwater and who even knows what all things considered and the strands brush his forehead in a way that still manages to give him a boyishly handsome appearance. If Ashley were to notice that type of thing…in between counting beds in a hotel room, of course. 

“Okay, well, I’m not exactly Hugh Grant so I guess it works.” 

“Yeah, definitely,” Ashley assures him quickly. “You’re much better than Hugh Grant anyway. He could never…” She trails off, crossing her arms over her chest before she can do something even more embarrassing like mimic that firing of a gun or something. “I’m definitely glad you’re here and not Hugh Grant,” she finishes instead, which is barely better, she thinks. 

At least there’s another soft sort of smile. “Thanks. I guess I’ll take that as a compliment.” 

Ashley nods and keeps her mouth shut.

For once.

Leon doesn’t so much as offer her the first shower as make it obvious that he isn’t going to be taking one until she does so she might as well just put them both out of their misery and get to it. And any thoughts Ashley might’ve possibly had about protesting vanish immediately when she steps beneath the warm spray, tipping her head back and letting the water sluice down her face, her neck, between her shoulder blades, all across skin that had previously felt like it might never get clean again.

Now, at least, there feels like there’s something of a chance.

She takes longer than she’d intended, finally emerging to find herself scrubbed pink with flushed cheeks and damp hair, looking at her reflection in the mirror like she’s suddenly become a perfect stranger. Ashley reaches out, touching the reflection of what she knows to be her own face, left only slightly smudged by the lingering steam on the glass. Really, she looks the same. No one would be able to look at her and know any of the things she’s done and seen over the past few days. But still, Ashley feels like a stranger to herself, to the girl looking back at her with serious eyes, hollow and far away. Soon, all of this will be over. She’ll be back home and her father can feel reassured that he isn’t the reason that his only daughter is forever lost or dead or worse. And she’ll go back to school, back to her friends, back to…all the inane things she was doing before she realized that monsters were real and they were worse than any of the stories she’d ever heard around a Girl Scout campfire. 

Ashley ignores her reflection in favor of finishing drying herself off and dressing into the sweats and oversized shirt from the hotel’s gift shop. Seems like the safer option anyway. 

Leon looks slightly relieved to see her when she emerges, though Ashley is certain it’s because that finally means he can actually get clean and stop standing around in his absolutely filthy clothes. He points toward a collection of protein bars and peanut butter crackers on the table. “Help yourself.”

Ashley frowns despite the fact that her stomach is currently devouring itself with a ravenous determination. “I was kinda hoping for, you know, a double cheeseburger and a giant plate of cheese fries.”

Oh god. Just saying the words out loud makes her want to double over and start weeping. 

She is never going to take McDonalds for granted again.

Leon gives her a sympathetic look, seeming genuinely apologetic. “I know. But it’s been a while since you’ve eaten anything, right?” She presses her lips together, which is answer enough for him. “So it’s best to ease into it. Otherwise you’ll just…lose it all again anyway.” 

Ashley groans but doesn’t argue, plucking out one of the granola bars at random. 

“Trust me, I know,” Leon says, his apologetic expression turning slightly amused. “They aren’t my favorite either.” 

By the time Leon has the shower running, Ashley has nearly devoured the bar, absently flipping through the TV channels as she settles on the bed furthest from the door. All the programs are in Spanish, though she thinks she might be able to parse out what’s going on purely by watching what everyone is doing and employing some of that high school Spanish she’d feigned her way through.

Not that it matters, really.

She’s asleep before she even finishes eating the granola bar. 

And, eventually, her dreams take her back there again, just as Ashley had known they would. Back to the castle, with its stone walls and floor leeching the heat from her skin and smelling like damp and mold and something far older than anything she’d ever known. Something that would be around long after she was gone.

It takes her back to rough hands on her arms, on her legs, around her mouth. To the way a person looked as their head exploded from a gunshot, or as they lie dying with anger in their eyes. It takes her to leviathan creatures who care nothing for Ashley Graham, the only daughter of the President of the United States, who once thought she might ride horseback in the Olympics but instead fell in love with antiques and architecture and the smell of an old house as it was restored back to life. People and things who saw her as a pawn and nothing more, something they would use until she was twisted and empty and a memory to the people who had once loved her. 

It takes her back to a cold basement room, a searing pain in her chest that was surely worse than dying would’ve been. To a weight she never thought she would be able to lift, to the certainty that she was too late, that she wasn’t strong enough, that she would never be able to actually do anything right.

Back to the feeling that she was going to be there forever, that she would die there in the dark, her mind filling her with the certainty, now, that she had never actually left there at all. 

But then it all disappears just as quickly, snapping away like the flipping of a light switch, and Ashley’s eyes fly open and there’s Leon in front of her and they aren’t in the castle, aren’t in some ruined Spanish village, aren’t fighting for every single breath they take. His hands are on her shoulders, sharp and insistent, and it’s that pressure that brings her fully back to the moment, to the hotel room, to Leon in front of her.

“Ashley.” His voice is as sharp as his touch, worry creasing his features, and he seems to relax when she exhales, blinking at him. “Ashley, it was just a dream. You’re okay. It’s okay. I’m here now.” 

He blurs at the edges and her eyes fill with tears and she’s too tired, too sore, too empty to even care about crying in front of him after everything. Instead, Ashley just leans forward, closer, and he lets her, his hands moving from her shoulders, one settling around the nape of her neck when she settles against his chest. 

“It’s okay,” Leon says again, quietly, his breath warm against the nape of her neck. “It’s okay. It’s over. You’re safe now.”

Ashley swallows, shaking her head. Her tears are silent, her body too exhausted to muster the noise that might go with them. “How can you be sure?” 

After all, she’d thought she was safe before. She’d thought nothing could ever happen to her. She was untouchable, privileged. 

What an idiot she was. 

Leon, to his credit, doesn’t rush to reassure her. Doesn’t just immediately start throwing platitudes at her and spinning the same sort of fairy tales that she’d believed in for far too long.

He’s just quiet, contemplating, as he keeps one hand settled gently against the curve of her head, the other holding tightly to hers. Ashley can’t remember how that had happened…had she reached for him? Had he been the one to hold her hand? 

It hardly seems to matter now.

Finally, Leon says, “Because I still have plenty of bullets.”

Ashley laughs, startled by the impulse, the noise thick and watery. She sniffs, leaning back and wiping at her cheeks as she nods. “Okay.”

Bullets, she believes in.

Just like she believes in Leon, how he’d been right beside her through everything, how he’d come for her and hadn’t left her behind. And how it feels, even now, to have him there beside her.

And there might be two beds, but that doesn’t stop Leon from settling himself down beside her, his presence solid and reassuring as he waits for her to fall asleep once more. 

[awaitingfall]

07.14.24

Wasn’t planning on posting today, but I’m starting to feel a little anxious so maybe writing it out will help.

I feel like something’s been going on with my heart. It beats so fast and so hard at random times throughout the day. Well it might not be random because I feel like it happens after I eat certain foods like carbs, and then maybe after a long day of not being too active it starts to beat like that in the evening. Or also when I’m having bad stomach cramping, which happened this morning again. But also just walking up a flight of stairs. I live on the 3rd floor of my apartment building and I walk up and down them everyday, you’d think my body would get used to it by now? But I literally have to stop before the last flight and just chill for a few seconds before I finish. And it’s not like I’m incredibly out of shape or anything.

I’ve only noticed it get this bad in the past few months, but I’ve definitely had a faster heart rate almost all my adult life. I don’t really remember the POUNDING heart ever being an issue other than after I’ve done something super active. Part of me feels like it could be from my neighbor’s cigarette smoke getting into our apartment and breathing that in whenever we’re home. Most times when we come home it REAKS of cigarettes. All I want is to have my own space away from other people’s bullshit but I don’t have enough money for a down payment on a house 😭 Anyways, I really don’t know what else it could be from. Maybe my meds are starting to affect me, but I’ve been on the same ones for years now, nothing’s changed. Although, now that I think of it, I used to take my anxiety meds at night before bed until I realized that I would get a pounding heart when I was just laying in bed trying to fall asleep. So I looked it up and that is one of the side effects of the med…shit, maybe that has a lot to do with it since switching to taking it in the morning. Damn I would’ve never thought about that if I didn’t right all this out, SEE writing out my problems DOES help sometimes! 🥲 Regardless, I could probably work on my cardio to help strengthen my heart, but I feel like that’s not fully addressing the issue. I see my doctor at the end of the month and I’m going to ask her to refer me to a cardiologist so they can run tests. I’m only worried because my grandfather died from heart related issues, although he didn’t have those problems until he was older. I just want to be careful and take care of myself as best as possible, especially while I’m still young.

I’m sure my anxiety doesn’t help with the rapid heart rate. I’m sure it just makes it worse once I start worrying about it.

I really want to be off of all of my meds. I feel like starting birth control is the reason I began having thyroid issues and made my anxiety worse. But I’ve been on birth control for 10 years now and I’m scared of how my body is going to react to stopping it 😰 If anyone has had any experience with stopping birth control can you comment or send me a message about how that went (would be even better if it was the Kariva brand). I feel like I hear so much negative stuff and I’m worried if I stop it it’s going to uproot my entire life. I did have fairly painful periods before BC and my job is very active, I feel like I’d have to ask off at least 3 days/month just to rest, but I’m also the fucking anchor holding everything down at my job and the only one who can work the press so no actual orders would get done for 3 days and my boss would not be about that 😭

Idk, just a lot to overthink about. But hopefully since I wrote it out here it won’t keep me up all night and I can have a peaceful sleep 😌

I’m just going to start fresh tomorrow. Wake up at 5am, start with a guided meditation sitting up in bed, drink some water and take my meds, then go upstairs and get a nice well-rounded workout in. My breakfast will be scrambled eggs with kimchi, spinach and feta cheese on some sourdough toast. Then I’ll prep my lunch and dinner which will both be plain Greek yogurt with some of that farm-fresh honey I just picked up today and a goji berry trail mix on top. And then I’ll spend the evening reading.

I just can’t let my boss stress me out tomorrow. The fact that he’s back in the shop for 2 months just makes me want to quit, but I know I’m stronger than that and can’t let a random human being affect my mental health like that. I shouldn’t let anything affect my mental health, unless it’s in a positive way 😤

[so2collection]

Star Ocean: Blue Sphere Beginner’s Guide

Introduction: I've been on a bit of a Star Ocean kick lately, and thought I'd take my hand at writing a Blue Sphere "Tips for Beginners!" type guide (based on the English ROM translation)... With Second Story R coming out soon, I figure that more people will be interested in Blue Sphere, too.

I hope my experience and the tips here help you on your adventure!

I played the game once before, but the save data was on an old computer... I want to add it to a list of titles I've completed!

Read more advice/tips under the cut! I’ll provide general tips on how to learn things, what characters to use, Private Actions, and other things! :)

Which characters to use? To start, you can pick your roster out of a few characters. Generally, Dias and Chisato are the best fighters. Precis excels at Item Creation. You'll want Celine if you plan to play late/post-game content.

However, for the first section I recommend taking Ashton. He is also a good fighter and I hear he's easy to combo with. If you've read interviews with the devs, they recommend Ashton and Precis as the game was originally made around them and one other character (they forgot) but eventually added everyone due to popularity. :)

Anyway, I recommend Ashton because he learns Cooking the fastest of anyone, according to seiju-info, a website I will have to reference often due to the lack of English resources. I'll also reference GameFAQs. You'll want cooking early on and you can buy a frying pan in the first town. Fol is very difficult to get in this game as you only earn SP from battles, no cash. I'll explain this more in depth later.

For a dungeon walkthrough, I found this GameFAQs guide useful

If you can, also use the maps on GameFAQs or purchase your own copy of the Star Ocean: Blue Sphere Final Guide. It has full-color maps, but is fully in Japanese. Still, I found it useful, especially in the dungeons. According to the devs, the dungeons got a lot of 'feedback' from fans... and for good reason. They're kind of long and annoying lol but if you're a Star Ocean fan, especially of 2, I think you should give this title a shot. It was made to bridge the wait for Star Ocean 3, but I'm using it as a bridge between my playthrough of Second Story I recently finished again and the remake... :)

I’m not learning new moves / spells?

If you're wondering why certain characters aren't gaining new moves, it's probably one of the following: you aren't making combos, you're levelling the wrong Skill section, for mages you aren't using a variety of spells, or you haven't created their moves through Machinery. These are specific to each character. For my party of Dias, Precis, and Celine... (Dias: combos, Precis: machinery, Celine: the right skill tree / learning the lost magic skill).

I can say at the beginning of this, I don't understand how the skill trees work at all. Just level the 2 the character is good at (Dias is Sense and Battle for example). This is important because if you leveled Dias in Knowledge, it would block off Battle if you raise Sense too high. 

Technology VS Sense and Battle VS Knowledge

So, for Dias, we would level Sense (so you get Psychometry to get his ultimate skills with combos), Battle, then put any points into one of the others.

Celine needs to have certain stats met and use a spell x number of times to "spark" the next spell. For her ultimate spells, she needs to level Knowledge for Lost Magic. However, if you want her to have the highest INT and forego her final spell (which isn’t worth the increase from Boost) look at Technical instead.

Mages won't learn new magic using spells on their own, you must control them / spam specific spells, so it's good to use low level enemies to learn new spells.

Item Creation tips

That's why it's good to have some reserve characters for Item Creation, such as Ashton for Cooking. Why Ashton? Well, he learns it the quickest. There really aren't any charts availible for this, but each character unlocks different skills as you level them; it is not like the original game where you get to choose. He learns the 3 skills required the fastest by unlocking them the earliest.

Think of it this way: pick 3-4 of the characters to use in battle and use the rest for only Item Creation! Because of the teleport function, it’s easy to switch them out.

Each Item Creation skill has a mini-game involved. It only uses the directional buttons and you can master the quickest/best way to do them easily. Cooking, with the Frying Pan for example, is right (short time), left (short time), right (long time) as you “flip” the ingredients. You don’t want them to burn or spill. I’ll go more in-depth with these as I unlock them myself.

Celine is one of the best characters to learn Alchemy. We will need it towards the end to make the elusive Blue Sphere for ultimate weapons.

Private Actions - How To?

Private Actions are few in this game and require very specific character conditions! If a PA says “OUT” that character must NOT be in the active party. If it says IN, they must be in the active party.

They also can happen pretty much anywhere: in towns, dungeons, ect.

How to play? General strategy?

To switch characters in battle, use Select.

To use items in battle, press Start.

To defend in battle, press the down arrow.

Break objects (tables, chairs, some plants) to sometimes find items.

If an enemy is too tough or blocking a path (that isn't a boss) you can attempt to run by moving to the far right of the screen. If you fail, your character runs out of their hidden stamina stat for awhile. If you win, the enemy disappears and you can snag any treasure / move on with ease.

PA's don't have any indicator. It's like talking to your comrades around a town and everything, but it feels more like an NPC interaction than a traditional Star Ocean PA. Because of the character IN/OUT (of active party) requirements, they can be easy to miss.

Forest / Crash Site

Bowman is also useful until you get to the Scout Village (Herb Gathering on the candy cane striped plants). To gather some herbs and to view Bowman's PA, exit Scout village and cut down the bush to the left. There will be a path where you can see the long-leaf stripey plants that Bowman can harvest. If he's not in the party, talk to him and initiate the PA. 

Private Action - Forest / Crash Site - Bowman (OUT) - Bowman gives you herbs.

Bowman references the Metox, saying it's a very powerful herb :p

Scout Village

Private Action - Scout Village - Precis (OUT) - Precis is looking for parts to repair the ship. 

Sometime during the Mile Ruins (maybe before?), if you have an herb, one will randomly be selected if you talk to the boy near the entrance of Scout Village. You will get a Kitchen Knife (used for Cooking) in exchange.

Fuck this NPC in particular. Get the Hell out of the way, bro!!

Mile Ruins

Finish the Mile Ruins. Don't forget to use the bomb on the crack in the wall to turn the elevators back on, especially to visit the 6th floor for some good items like earrings for Celine. There are other areas that require the Pull Field Skill and Precis' Hover, so you'll have to come back later on for the other items.

Vending Machine 1st Floor - Give it a lighter touch to get a useless but one-of-a-kind ??? Jam you can’t get anywhere else.

Check drawers for items and fol!

When you get out, go to the shops in the back of town. The left shop should have a discount, so buy some blueberries and a Frying Pan. Also buy Meat. Level up Ashton in Knowledge, Sense, and Tech until he learns the 3 skills for Cooking (Good Eye, Recipe, and he should start with Kitchen Knife) (If you're having trouble selling items, remember to scroll right to sell from other item categories; took me a little time to figure out. For the mini-game, gently move left to right and try to aim for the flipping food, because if you drop it it takes time which lowers your overall score. Try to aim for over 100.) If you can't afford meat to make steak, I highly recommend using the vegetables (which she usually has one sale, too!) to make Twice Cooked Pork and Amazing Vegetable Stir Fry, which also sells for a lot of Fol.

The shop on the left has Bombs if you need them (you'll need at least 1 to clear the path on the lower right of town). He will also give you the Bunny Comm.

There's a PA we can do. Ashton IN, Dias OUT. Kick out Dias and grab Precis and we can use her Pull ability to get some of the items we missed.

Private Action - Mile Ruins - Ashton (IN) / Dias (OUT) - The two reflect on their swordsmanship. Particularly, that weakness comes with aging. This also opens up another PA later in the game.

If you also teach Precis Machinery, you can learn Hover by making a Nuclear Jet. I think Machinery needs to be at level 5 to learn it. Don't bother learning it now, though, as we can't buy any soldering irons...

Rupart Jungle

Before you descend into the jungle you can trigger a fight with a Baboon. He's a little difficult but he gives a whopping 20 SP per fight and is a good spot to grind up characters if you need to. Just heal for free at the ship or the old man with the kid's house and save before fighting it each time. I did this 3-4 times just to have some extra SP handy (and it should be enough to teach Precis Machinery Lv 5, but again, no soldering iron yet...) You may want to invest it in Dias Sense skills instead. I've been leveling Celine's Knowledge, since that's what she needs to max out first. In one fight Dias and Precis were dead and I used Firebolt, which sparked Celine's Starlight spell! She also has Bless and I don't think she started with it, but I'm not sure when I learned it.

Spell - Starlight - Celine - Requires: Monstrology Learned, Use Firebolt in battle

A lot of enemies in Rupart Jungle are difficult, but save often and you'll manage. Once you talk to the guys about the permit for the two ruins, continue to Ava City. We can finally buy a soldering iron here, so you can have Precis learn Machinery lv 5 and then score around 200 points and create the item (save scumming is recommended...). Make sure to restock any items you need. Do some cooking and upgrade your equipment, too.

Garp Ruins

In the Garp ruins I used Dias, Ashton *required for his Fire Breath field action, and Noel. Some of the enemies are tough. You'll also want to bring a few bombs, mostly for the room behind the boss.

After the ruins I leveled Precis' Machinery to 6... It makes the soldering iron faster in the mini-game, the higher the level... but after two hours I still can't manage to get Hover (I barely score 110 points most of the time, because the iron is so wobbly...) On the bright side I made some money and got a lot of Opera's KMs, so that will be nice when I get her. 

Note: I did give it one last shot, and wouldn't you know, I got the Hover ability... I didn't even score that high of points, so I'm confused? I did learn that the farther away a node is / more diagonal it is, the more points you earn, so perhaps it's advantageous to wait for further/diagonal nodes? I wish you luck obtaining the Nuclear Jet for Hover! I'll make a short trip back to the Mile Ruins and Garp Ruins and get items I missed, then go return to Ava City and talk to the Jabba the Hut Man again lol

We finally see a little plot in this game...!

Leviabor Ruins (First Trip)

The Leviabor Ruins sucked. I think everyone knows that lol I used Dias, Precis, and Celine but I highly recommend bringing Noel instead. Celine learned Energy Arrows, though, which helped a bit! I only did the required floors for the time being and I've been focusing on maxing out each characters main skill branch for now.

I sold a bunch of Gold ingots for like 8k Fol... IDK if I'll need any later (I'm sure they can be made with Alchemy) but I didn't feel like putting athritis-hands through the riggamaroll of Cooking.

Spell - Wind Blade - Celine - Requires: INT 12, Use Firebolt in battle Spell - Energy Arrows - Celine - Requires: MP 160+ / Resistance learned, Use Starlight in battle

Speaking of, I haven't learned any new KMs for Dias. I can't combo at all. I couldn't even combo with Ashton, who is supposedly the easiest... so yeah, late game is gonna be rough.

Ava City (After free from prison)

Remember the girl you saved and got sent to Leviabor prison for? If you talk to her boyfriend, he gives you an item based o what console you are playing on (Gameboy gives a Might Chain... Gameboy Color gives a ???. I'm using Gameboy Advance emulator, so I got a Lunar Talisman)

Yay, Ernest! I guess... I probably won't use him...

I kind of forgot about PAs, so here's some I did to take a break before the Gravis Forest. I remember my last playthrough I did this forest on the Super Gameboy and yeah... you thought it was bad in color. It's ten times worse when its limited to like, 2 colors... a monotone mess. If I didn't have the strategy guides I'd never get through it.

Private Action - Ava City - Bowman (IN) / Celine (OUT) -  Bowman has a daughter! And her name is Erys! :o Notes: If done before recruiting Opera, you get this PA. If after, an Opera PA occurs instead. You can't get both according to the guide I'm looking at. Apparently this PA leads to more rare items late game as it unlocks a PA later.

Private Action - Ava City - Chisato (IN) / Celine (OUT) - Chisato helps the girl on the west side of town find a job to support the girl’s brothers. Unlocks a hidden shop. The secret weapon shop (below) has decent upgrades!

Go through Gravis Forest until you find the hideout, then talk to the soldier on the west side and show him the permit you got in Ava.

Gravis Forest Part 1

Follow the beetles

Look for the old man

Use a map

If you can combo, this place might be pretty easy. I can't get past 2 hits, so I focused on my mages and spamming Dias' basic attack to keep the apes in the second section from decimating my party...

Celine learned Curse during my time in the forest. Spell - Curse - Celine - Requires Fairyology - Spark with Firebolt

Spell - Bless - Celine- Start (I had her spark this, I swear... but the guide says she starts with it...)

Also, I don't really use Noel, but he learned a ton of spells including Dispel, which is very handy when you get confused by the beetles.

Spell - Dispel - Noel - Start (Oh, I didn’t notice...) Spell - Silence - Noel - Start (Really? I guess I was looking under Magic and not Technique...)

Apparently he starts with Bless, too? IDK

Hideout

In the hideout, it will be registered to your teleporter, so if you want to switch some characters around, go for it. There's an inn and a shop in the hideout as well, so restock and move on through part 2.

Gravis Forest Part 2

For the gorilla boss, Dias had HP around 450+ and I let him take hits because I can't combo to stop the arm spin. Try to use the Up+B combo to "kill" the arms first, if you can. When you're back at the hideout again, talk to the guy out front to heal and then save. The boss, Atlas, died with one shot of Celine's Thunderbolt... sure is nice to see anything do damage in this game. You'll be healed and sent to he Slave Village. Save again and prepare for another boss... Three of Celine's Thunderbolts took it out. :)

Slave Village

Private Action - Slave Village - Precis (OUT) That PA in Slave City with Precis should be open. Noel asks Precis what's the matter and offers her one of Chisato's snacks to cheer her up :) When that doesn't work, Noel starts calling a doctor (Bowman) for her. Precis finally spills her worries, about a friend named Latry (Razzly maybe?) who might forget... to record Precis' soap opera... Noel is not amused.

After the events on your second trip to Slave Village, you open a new path to Nusa Beach. On the far left you can flip some switches to make a shortcut back to the ship... for some reason, I guess.

We have some optional dungeons to do for now, so return to the ship/restock/ect.

Remember those soldiers outside Ava City blocking that dungeon? We can go now.

Ralph Ruins - Optional

Be careful where you step, it's similar to Gravis and that you can fall easily.

The wires on the lower levels seem impassable; all you need is someone with the Jump field action.

I recommend bringing Precis with Hover so you can reach some treasure and also not fall as often. This is especially useful for the conveyor belts just like in Leviabor. All I can say is just gather as many batteries as you can and on the basement level, look for a generator near a red snake in the bottom left of the overall map that says something like "activates elevator movement". Head as high as you can on the elevators and then all the way left you'll see the crab boss. You have to live long enough, but 3 Thunderbolts takes him out easily. *update note about Precis in conveyors in Leviabor.

Behind the boss is a treasure with the first of 10 Rings we need for the Cave of Trials. Although I'm not planning to do them... but we did miss one in Garvis forest. If you want, go back and get it now (look for unusual, square hole right of the entrance to the forest). If I have time, I’ll add a guide at the end for the rings and how to open the last dungeon (as well as Celine’s Telelport).

Crane Ruins - Optional

BRING A FULL STOCK OF BOMBS, you'll need them! 

I highly recommend anytime you need to restock go to Scout village, because they often have sales on Blueberries and food ingredients. Plus, the bomb shop is right next to the item shop.

Crane Ruins are located south of Ava City (if you hit Slave Village you went too far, you need to go south, slightly east, south, and east again). Unfortunetly you need Precis (and a guide I saw recommended Ashton) for this dungeon, so you'll probably go with Dias, Ashton, and Precis... You could manage with Dias, Precis, and Noel, too. Celine is helpful for the machines and crabs, so if you don't need a healer, take her instead.

If you did that PA back in Mile Ruins, there's another with Ashton and Dias on the generator floor of the Crane Ruins. It's a shame you need Dias out, because you'll likely have to complete the dungeon and then return without him to see it. Luckily, it isn't too much of a feat.

Most of the enemies are easy here, except for the big rats. Try to avoid them and if you can't, use KMs if you have them or run.  

The upper floors have blocks you have to move onto buttons. Make < style arrows with them in the direction of doors you want open on that floor. When you get Floor 2 and 3, you can combine them to move say, > right and ^ up, but there's just some treasure here. Your goal is B1. You'll need Swim/Dive and Hover makes it easier. Collect the treasure by hovering to all the platforms and then take it section by section and dive for treasure. If you activate the generators on the bottom floor, you can also open up stairs to a boss. I tried a few times but Dias wasn't even scratching him, so I gave up for now. I'll come back to that ugly green bastard later.

Ocean Cave (Nusa Beach) - Optional

The final optional dungeon (Ocean Cave) is in Nusa Beach (go South as far as you can, if you got to Vanis city you didn't go far enough; look for the barnacles) and you need Swim/Dive to complete that, so chances are you'll be taking Precis then. I did check and other characters can learn it, but not as easy (well, Dias at least) but I'll just drag Precis along... I'm gonna gripe about it in my review, but it really sucks how you're forced to carry around Precis as an HM slave, since she sucks so much in battle. 99% of the time she's just dead in fights because it isn't worth the 5 blueberries to heal her. I think if they ever remake this game, there should be some sort of machine to carry around the abilities instead, so you don't waste a slot. Or, even better, a way to switch characters from the ship to your active party in dungeons... It would increase your options and this game is all about not giving you any options. For example, combos being the only way to give fighters more KMs is bad design. Not that they would have MP to use them anyway, because the ideal way to level them gives no MP increases... Just... bad design.

This is how an average fight is going for me. Fun! :(

I'm ranting a lot at this point because this Ocean Cave was my third dungeon that day and I was just burnt out and exhausted of enemies that take 5 minutes to kill, keep respawning, ect. Even with a map, knowing what to do is confusing. I went and found a lever I couldn't flip and a door that needs the lever to open? But then I read in the guide you need a keycard.... So this morning, that's where I'm at. Bored, tired, and I just want the game to give me a break.

The Ocean Cave is added into the teleporter, so feel free to leave/return for supplies if you need to. I decided to go back, use some SP, and experiment with Smithing.  Longsword + Meteorite (50 Point Score) should make a stronger sword, but we don't have Meteorite. *sigh* So my thought process was, well, I'm taking damage, so maybe I'll make better armor.

Enchantment Use the chart on this site to determine the Armor latent value.

How it works: Armor + Source = Better Armor. Each Armor has a set amount of points needed to make it based on the formula below. I'll use the example the guide provided me. Formula: Armor Latent Points + Score Divided by 2 = Total Score (The Total Score determines what you get) Magic Resist Armor (35 latent points) + Score of 27 or higher Divided by 2 = 31 Total Score = Resist Armor possible.

I want to make a Duel Suit, as it's one of the best armors... So I used: Resist Armor (25) + Score of 125 or more = 150 Divided by 2 = 75 Total Score in theory should get a Duel Suit... (Note: I couldn’t get the score high enough, so no... I think I need Titania Source and max level for Enchantment...)

I'm not entirely clear how Sources play into the calculation, but they seem to provide some sort of bonus when scoring points? So, save scum and use rare Sources to easily create high level armor. (High level sources: Elf, Dark Elf, Titania)

I tried for a little while, but the two just kept swapping between Resist/Magic armor. I think I need Celine's Enchantment level higher (it's only 4) to make the mini-game easier, so we may as well get back to the dungeon and get some SP for that.

Back at the Ocean Cave... The keycard we need is on the third floor. Try to hang left for most of the time and you should reach it across a tiny water section. I went to where the guide said the card was and was back at the lever, which I could magically pull now. I have no idea what's going on (perhaps you have to examine the door on the lower level first, which is bullshit) but we should be able to move forward now. At the statue room, pull all the levers except the reset, go down the stairs, hop down, pull the green blocks, and drop down. You can unlock the door for later (you have to return with Teleport to get the treasure... ughhhh) and go fight the boss who is easier than almost every enemy in the damn cave. Grab the chest behind it and leave so we can go do the story again.

I will say, it is nice we get to see an Edifian as a reward for this bonus dungeon... So there's that.

Vanis City

Don't waste money on the Elf Sources; you'll be able to buy the good ones soon.

I've been wondering where Opera is too. :( She's my favorite character, so imagine how sad I was that you can't use her for half of this game. Speaking of, this is almost the half way point. Not including resets and deaths, I've logged about fifteen hours playtime, so seems about right. The shops don't offer any better weapons, but there is some better armor for your mages. Get that when you can.

Private Action - Ashton OUT Noel IN - Ashton's feeling a little hopeless and Noel tries to cheer him up.

Private Action - Leon OR Opera IN, Ernest OUT - (I used Leon) They discuss how strange the planet feels (as if man-made) and how Edifice compares to Expel.

Private Action - Chisato OUT - Chisato has one line that just says Vanice City is kinda peaceful.Talk to the guy in the bar and we learn Opera is researching with another scientist in the City of Knott. Head South of town once you're ready. 

Road to Knott

Bring a few bombs. Most of the enemies are easy.

Don’t walk forward on the beautiful screen above... you take damage lol

Ah, the infamous

Ruddle sidequest

begins. If you explore thoroughly, you'll find him on the way.

Please use CTR F to find my updated guide later (See: Scream), because I made an error here.

Spell - Noel - Cure Light - Requirements: INT 40+ stats, spark with Heal Spell - Noel - Fairy Heal - Requirements; INT 70+  stats, spark with Cure Light

Noel knows this game is gonna ramp up, huh?

Knott

The Blue Sphere, huh? I’ll be back for you, sir.

Oh my god we finally get new boots and a new weapon for Dias. There's also Rune Bucklers, if you haven't gathered enough from dungeons for your mages. You can also buy the Dark Elf Sources now, so level up someone in Enchantment (Celine is difficult because you need to max her Tech first... so you can't level it to max, but you can get it high level) and try to craft some better armor.

Speaking of, Dias and Celine have 2-3 of their skills maxed in their primary category. I have been avoiding battles on the Road to Knott, so I may go back and train. The plants are fairly easy and they give around 35 SP each.

Enchantment, attempt 2

It took me about 10 resets to get a Magic Armor and a Dark Elf Source to become a Magic Resist Armor. I had to score 50 to get it. The trick is finding the 3rd checkpoint (when the cane glows white) before the timer runs out. When I tried again with the Magic Resist and a Dark Elf Source, after only 1 checkpoint I somehow got the Nexus Armor... I don't get it, either, you guys... Ideally I want another Nexus Armor and something stronger for Celine. I created a Mithril Coat for Celine and it seems if you get checkpoints in the center, it scores higher. Part of this may just be luck. I wish I understood it better...

I’m on my way! Woosh~

Knott Secret Ruins

Once you're ready head into the laboratory of Knott (top right of city) through the 2nd room on the right, at the back. I can't help much with the dungeon, so please follow a guide. 

Opera and Dias are my favorite characters... I feel re energized, even if I can’t use her in battle right now... (You CAN use her, but there isn’t any reason to over Dias, sadly.)

After you run into Opera, go down another floor, move the switch to the left in the first room (I used Noel with Pull because I wasn’t taking Precis again if I didn’t have to) and then head down a few times and you'll be at the boss. When you get to the room with the two big long-nosed blue guys (Carlas???) use Celine's Thunderbolt to take them out and save before going through the bottom right door.

In a random battle I accidentily used Bless instead of Thunderbolt. Celine got Anti.

Spell - Anti - Celine - Requires: RES 50+ stats, spark with Bless

Spell - Magnum Tornado - Noel - Requires INT 45+ - Spark with Wind Blade

I love how Rival casually is like "let's look for the LOTR stone!" and we just go with it.

I think I have trauma from the “join event” text from Star Ocean: the Second Story Ending 86 Guide I made... ;__;

The boss isn't too bad. Celine's Thunderbolt takes out a few parts. Finish him off with Dias forward stab regular attack and you should be good. I did have to heal a few times with Noel. After the fight, grab the Palantir and teleport back to the ship, restock, and then go find Rival in Knott.

Knott (again) lol Meet with Rival. She explains that she met Opera while looking for new discoveries. Rival is trying to find some ancient spaceship and asks everyone to go explore ruins. (For real, we should have just taken parts from Knott and fixed our ship and GTFO lol we have to help her because Opera helped her... oh, wait, no, we said Rival helped Opera after she crash landed... sure lol Opera only saved Rival from some rando rolly polly. Whatever. We have to go meet a guy at the bar in Vanis City.

Vanis City (return) Leave Knott and teleport to the ship and then to Vanis. Go to the bar and talk to the green guy, Simon, to learn about some ruins. The Ocean Cave, to be exact... which we already did. Upon leaving the bar someone shows up and says go to Knott! So back we go.

Knott (AGAIN) You'll be forced to fight red beetles, like the ones in Gravis. They should be cake now if you've levelled Dias a bit. They took a few forward slash basic attacks each. Same strategy with the 3 grey beetles. Once you save Rival, you find out that they unleashed some awful monsters from Gravis forest's underground. When you're ready, go to the door at the back of Rival's room that you couldn't go to before.

Gravis' Forest Path

I took Dias, Celine, Noel. Make sure you're fully stocked, this area isn't on the ship teleporter.

Bring a bomb if you're playing on a Gameboy/Super Gameboy 1 (Note: must be original, not a Color or Advance) and when you come upon a tower, you can use a hidden door on the right to enter or blow up the crack with a bomb (Mobile port only). I'm really kinda ticked because if you choose the item on the right you get a Blue Sphere just handed to you. This plus that Might Chain from earlier makes playing on a Gameboy or Super Gameboy 1 almost worth it... So, sadly I didn't get this item. I remember in my old playthrough this was around where I put the game down because the angel inside looks like Lenneth. Her sprite gets reused a lot in this game... I really thought it was Lenneth, though! :p Apparently her name is Maria--maybe an allusion to Star Ocean Til the End of Time (this title was a holdover until 3 released, so...)

Continue forward along the path until you reach the cave. Along the way are more of the red beetles. For the boss fight ahead, if you're using Celine, you may want to aquire Ray or Southern Cross. Here's how: Use Starlight (have MP 100+, INT 40+) to gain Ray and then use Ray (260 MP+, 80+ INT, know Herbology) to spark it. It's highly likely you won't have her Tech maxed out yet to learn Herbology for Southern Cross, but Ray should work in a pinch. It only took me four battles to spark Ray.

Gravis Forest II / Gravis Forest Cave

The red beetles seem to go down quicker with Starlight, but also Dias should be taking them out in 1-3 hits on average. I also had a red beetle drop a Mithril Mesh once I reached the forest, which is an upgrade to the Nexus Armor.

There are many hidden paths that lead to treasure, ect. so make sure you have a map handy. Go right and just keep going right and you'll stumble upon the Brown Card. After this, explore as thoroughly as possible to get everything. Most of the enemies are really easy, especially if you get initiative.

There is one room on the center/right side that has a large enemy called the Dragon Warrior. Luckily, you'll need Teleport so you'll have to come back later for this. If you beat him 5 times you get one of the rings for the bonus dungeon. If you have Ashton, you'll also get some cool dialogue between Gyoro and Ururun.

When you come across the room with two levers in the center, move the left one and continue exploring a bit. You'll need to get to Floor 2 to finish the puzzle. Along the way you'll probably see two chests, one in the top left and one lower/right from that. Once again, you'll need Teleport for them. I don't know what dev expects me to backtrack for this crap, because I don't plan to. Go across the bridge you lowered to Floor 2, flip the switch. Falling here does nothing, so don't worry about it. Go back across and you'll see some yellowish stairs. Use Jump to get back to the double lever room and swap the order from before, which lowers the stairs completely. Save before going to the boss room.

Apsaras (hey, I recognize you from Megaten!)... not how I expected you to look. Anyway, I tried the Japanese website guide of using Ray, but... it did fucking nothing. The Official guide only recommends raising STR as high as possible and says even specials do very little here. Basically, this battle is gonna be a slog. Use items to your advantage.

Seriously, this boss sucks. I almost put the game down.

My strategy was to control Dias and do a sort of attack a bit, back off/heal as needed, attack some more. Be careful, if you take out it's legs, it just insta-kills everyone after a few attacks... I'm seriously debating using cheats for this fight, because it's that hard. I KNOW the game wants me to combo to prevent it from attacking, but when you suck at stupid fighting game ass skills, it's useless. There really needs to be any kind of work around...

Okay, so I was reading up and the JP website says Dias just needs MP and to attack based on range for some of the lower level killer moves. Go figure, he only just now started getting an MP boost. I still can't combo for shit (got a 6 somehow in the boss fight) but I did put some points into Awakening. However, I don't think that's what helped... So I equipped this random ass ring I had because I think it gives you Strong Blow? Anyway, this boss went down in like 20 seconds once I had it on Dias! I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS GAME IS ANYMORE. For information on where I got the ring, it was on B1 Floor of the Ocean Cave! It's called the Eclipse Ring and the Official guide translates the ability added as "Strike". I don't know what this ability is exactly but it seems to have saved my ass here. I got flashback to the Protection Rings / Barker fight in Star Ocean the Second Story... Ironically, that boss fight was what kind of gave me the idea to look at accessories. Nice to see something stayed from 2 that was actually worthwhile.

Return to the ship, restock, return to Knott and go to the lab and talk to Rival. She explains that the Edifians were destroyed by a flood/tidal wave and that someone may have caused it. To learn more, she asks us to take her to Scream (and Lung). These names, bro... Anyway, we gotta go back to the road to Knott and find a new pathway.

Road to Knott 2 If you remember where we saw Ruddle, with those plant octopus guys, go back there. Rival opens the previously locked door and we're at Scream.

Scream You will need Precis' Hover if you want all the items, but they should be gemstones and armor you saw like four dungeons ago. What you really want are the Sharp Edge and Sorceress Knuckles, if SO2 taught me anything. I was pretty boggled considering those are potentially strong / really strong weapons for Claude and Rena in SO2... You just need Push for those, so Noel should be fine. (Note: I later learned Rena uses knives, so... I guess the knuckles are good for Noel.)

Star Ocean has this thing where it really ramps up it’s environments late game and I’m feeling it! Scream has great graphics and atmosphere. (I forgot to get a picture, though...)

Once you get the weapon upgrades, go through the right door in that same area where Rival is waiting. There's a teleport pad but you can set it to specific places. Going to Nusa Beach or Mile Shop don't have a way back, so don't bother. Select Scream Floor 2 and keep trudging along. Don't go through the upper door. There's a PA with Rena later and if you go now, you lose the chance to complete it.

Your goal is to get the entire tower to line up. Once you get to 4th Floor, save, because the boss is on Floor 5 and he's a bastard. First, I controlled Dias and charged the Minotaur to get some distance between it and the mages. Anything this dude uses KO's mages on impact. I mostly used Celine (with a fire boost and a ring that decreases cast time) with Ray. I wish I had Southern Cross, as it would do more damage... :( It was a big fucking struggle. I used like 4 revives, quite a few MP items, and a all party heal item. Somehow I won. If you get one part of him destroyed he should go down pretty quick after, even if it doesn't look that way. I also had to use a save state about halfway through the battle to save time. It's like 30% luck and 50% cursing, but you'll whittle him down somehow. Just don't let your mages anywhere near him whatsoever and revive immediately. If you wait too long to revive and they're behind the Minotaur, they are good as perma-dead, because he'll attack before you get to even move them out of the way. This entire boss was BS, almost as much as the last one. It's a trend in this game that needs to die.

City of Lung

Ruddle Sidequest Okay, in my last section I wasn't sure about the Ruddle quest. Unfortunetly, I chose the wrong direction and it lead to a dead end (the guide I was following was incorrect, so when I checked the Official Guide... yeah...), so this quest is over for me now that I've reached Lung. For the correct path, use the slapped together, Google translated pics I posted above. (I wanted to add the photo here, but Tumblr would NOT save it for some reason)

So much for my Fairy Ring :( I'm pretty peeved as it's so far back and I'm not doing those boss fights again. However, to make a Fairy Ring (halves MP cost, just like SO2), you can use Rune Metal and score between 270-319 with Jewelry Making (this is how the ROM translates it). I didn't have any Rune Metal, so I might try later.

Private Action *This PA has a small window, do it immediately - IN: Precis - Ship - Rival admires the ship and gives you a Tri-Emblem (increase all stats). I'm unsure if it breaks or something, so I'll save it for the end... This won't be availible if you talk to the Priest in Lung, so do this PA immediately.

Proceed down the path in Lung and you'll be escorted to the Priest, who is promptly killed by Rival. She also forces Claude and Rena to crash on Edifice, just like she did you.

She is the planet's "devil". She leaves and a remaining priest takes you to the top floor to meet an Edifian named Rose.

Rose explains Rival killed the Priest to get access to the Grand Knott, a weapon. Rose sacrifices a literal lung (I guess that's why the city is named that? lol) so you can breathe underwater when you go investigate the Comsat / Komsa Ruins.

Comsat Ruins - Bring a few bombs. - Equip Stone Checks

With the Aqualung, Dias can now use Swim/Dive, so we don't necessarily need to bring Precis. The dungeon is fairly straightforward. If a room doesn't loop back, look for a Microchip; this unlocks more floors on the elevator. There is also an item here we'll need to get Claude (yeah, he has a shitty sidequest; luckily this is the only item you’ll need for it), so make sure you nab the Minsidia by going 80% the way left on the continental shelf, then down to get the chest near the bottom. You'll have to backtrack, so be prepared. Once you backtrack once, teleport to the ship. This way you can just quickly return to the shelf by going to the ship/beginning of the dungeon. Anytime I got back to the starting floor, I went to heal/restock since it makes life easier. I avoided a lot of the enemies here as well, like the rhino-dino looking guys, because they just OKO'd my party all the time.

After getting the Minsidia, go back to the beginning of the continental shelf and retrace your steps across, but go all the way left and all the way down. You may want to grab Precis first because the two treasures here require Hover (a weapon for her and for Ernest--not worth trading out your healer, IMO). You'll now be in the seabed. You might be able to hover if you go left for a shortcut, IDK, but the path around is clockwise. If you want some treasure, go to the first door you see, but if you want to move onto the boss, just keep going clockwise towards the center.

I've had to do a lot of resets just because enemies KO Celine instantly :/ I've been using her Magic Shot field action to get the jump on some enemies and start battle controlling  her. A Thunderbolt takes out the Saber Fins in one shot. The Nautilus' take a lot of damage from Thunderbolt too, but to preserve MP, try to finish them off with Dias. They cause poison, so have Noel w/Dispel or cure poisons handy.

If you can get Celine's MP 200+ and INT 60+, you may have a good chance of sparking Thunderstorm, which may be an option we can use going further since Southern Cross isn't obtainable yet...

The red shark is a sub-boss and if you got Thunderstorm, he goes out in 1-3 casts of that. When it attacks again, you wake up in Aqua City and are greeted by an Edifian. Is that what we're doing here? Talking to them? It's so strange we go through this dungeon instead of searching for Claude/Rena immediately... just sayin'. Go around and talk to the Edifians for the first plot in awhile. You'll learn they fought Rival 200 years ago and failed when she flooded the planet. We also learn Claude and Rena crashed near Nusa Beach.

When you go to talk to the leader, they go on some typical Tri-Ace writing about the Aqualung being able to carry Rose's thoughts and that's how they know who you are and that the Priest wanted you to fight Rival. The leader goes onto say we need two more Edifian's help and must go to Ax and Azul and pass their trials. It's pretty similar to SO2 and the Four Fields. Head right from the leader's room and there are two warps.

Return to the ship and restock as needed. It's time to finally get Rena and Claude. Go to Nusa Beach (Use the shortcut in the Crash Forest or go through Slave Village passage [I also realized the upper left exit of Aqua City is a shortcut, later on... oops]) and get Rena, because you can't get Claude without her. One thing the website guide notes is they are completely optional. There is some text where Claude laments if you fail to recruit them, but since Rena is useful and we want the team reunited... let's go get them and level Rena up!

Nusa Beach Revisisted (Rena) Go to the location shown above (near one of the cities, I think? Before the Sea Cave) and you'll find Rena!

I hope you've been saving Knife weapons... apparently Rena uses them in this one. It feels like a reference to her og PS1 art, where she had a short sword / dagger. She also uses mage armors, so you may need to go purchase some of the better stuff in Knott/Lung. We have to "level" her anyway, so use any spare SP on her and go train somewhere if need be. Go to Lung to upgrade first, then go to Knott since that's our destination. Claude has a disease that a scientist named Rush there can cure.

Also, while you're at Lung, you may want to invest in some Titania Sources and upgrade some things, especially since Rena probably won't have an Isis Tiara, we may want to make her one or something better.

Raising Rena

*Note, she will not learn Gravity Press with this method, BUT Celestial Arrow is better anyway.

Sense - Physical Sensation, Danger Sense, Radio Waves(Transmission)

Battle - Parry, Quigong (I didn't learn these, because I didn't see them come up quickly...)

The above are optional but learn one set before the other.

After learning Sense skills, learn all TECH skills through Lezard Techno.

After learning all the above, raise INT until you get Lost Magic.

I levelled her at the base of the seabed. Use Celine's Thunderbolt to take out the Balloon Fish in a few hits. Enter the cave door and go back out to respawn. He gives 60 SP a go. I just refilled MP with Blackberries until I ran out, rinse/repeat. The cost of the Blackberries can suck, but don't forget that Scout often has them on sale. Also, depending on your playstyle, you may find an easier enemy that gives high SP, just do what works for you. In one "trip" I got Rena to a 67 Skill Level. Everyone else is around 100~ so I figured, close enough. I also raised Taijitsu a little for Celine and Rena so their HP was around 100 each.

Knott Revisisted (Claude) Go to the first door on the left of the science building where all those dungeons were to find Rush. He needs the Minsidia, which we already have. He makes the medicine and so we go to Vanis City.

Vanis City Revisited (Claude) You'll see a big guy right when you teleport there. Talk to him. Claude will be waiting at the ship if you want to use him.

Now we can return to Aqua City. We'll take on Ax first, since it's a bit easier.

Ax - Right

Go the upper left door of the area and climb the shell. You'll face the Lord of the Sea who gives you hints on how to progress. These change each new playthrough, but for my own notes, here's what they were in my playthrough: Go through the door of bubbles. He also gives us something, but I have no clue what it was. (Okay, I'm dumb. Realized this on door 2... grab the item bag that appears behind the guy you fought! There's an item in it.)

Next aim for the door right, right again, and down. There's a door where you repeat steps. There's the King of the Sea who says (in my playthrough) go through the bubble door two times.

Next go up and right through the door and repeat the process a final time. Now is the Master of the Sea. His clue for my playthrough was: You have to go through the doors four times in total.

Lovely. At this point I was running low on blackberries, so I left to restock. I also wanted to see if I could get Rena and spells since we've amassed some SP. To learn Fairy Heal, we need Fairyology. I think because INT is NOT opposite TECH, it's alright to raise and we won't lose points, since we will level it after INT anyway. So I went and spammed Cure Light to learn Fairy Heal. In about 3 fights on the road to Knott, I got Fairy Heal AND Fairy Light in the same battle by spamming Cure Light and using Fairy Heal for the first time... We FINALLY have a full party cure! If we spam Fairy Heal, we have a chance to learn Raise Dead, too...

Item Creation: Jewelry Making

I really kind of want a Fairy Ring for Rena, but I can't get the points higher than 130-150, when I need 200+... I did get an extra Star Necklace (reduces cast time) using 1 of my Rune Metals, though. You'll need to buy the Magical Rasp from Lung and try to make a Circle or Cross shape for the highest points. The highest I got was 180 making circles... :( I think I need the level higher, but it conflicts with Celine's learning path...

I screwed around with Compounding, since Rena had it at level 6 after I trained her up earlier. If you mix Thyme and Rosemary, they make the basic Resurrect item if you score 150ish. Nice to get revives. I know Athelas makes resurrection items and some MP items in SO2, but I don't think they exist here. The best item, the Metox, is obtained through connect battles, so that's out.

Item Creation: Compounding

Thyme and Thyme with a low score can make Mixed or Fruit Syrup (HP/MP small and medium restore) and seem like an easy/good combo to make for the dungeon treks. To get Thyme, you can hunt Hippos in Garp. There's 3 right at the entrance and they go down super fast now that we're so late in the game. Bonus, it can be an easy but grindy way to amass some SP (19 SP each I think), so it's a win-win if you got a TV show to binge and wanna grind a bit. Just remember you can only carry 15 of an item, but doesn't hurt to have a full stack and extra so you don't have to leave dungeons as often. Another alternative is to grab Bowman and go to Scout Village, exit, go left and explore the first two screens for herbs, walk back to the village real quick, and repeat. You should have a plethora of herbs at your disposal after.

Another good herb combo:

Lavendar and Lavendar (Score: Auto / 150+) = Resurrection Mist  (Revives one 100% HP.) If you score around 80, you can get a Mixed Syrup, too.

Lavendar and Rosemary (150+) make a Cure Stone.

Lavendar and Thyme (150+) can make Cure Paralysis.

Rosemary and Rosemary (170+) can make a Mental Pot (increases Symbology in fights)

Now, to get back to the game for a bit... I returned to the bottom/center door near the crab because apparently there's one more guy to fight. He is the Demon of the Abyss, just a giant crab. His hint for my file was: There's a tricky room in the center of the tower, you won't be able to leave it just walking normally. After the door of bubbles, you must go through the door of waves.

Once done, go back to the second door we went through (the one that was right, right, down, next to 2 crabs); this will lead to the central tower that just seemed to loop endlessly if you visited before. On either side there are two doors. The left is the wave door and the right is the bubble door. There are two gaps that must be hovered/jumped over. Based on our clues, we need to: Go through the door of bubbles two times. We have to go through the doors four times altogether. After the door of bubbles, we have to go through the door of waves. My first guess wasn't right, so I'm not sure I understand the riddle... You'll know if you failed because you auto-fall into one of the gaps. My solution was: Bubble, Wave, Bubble. I have no idea why. Go up the central tower, Raum, one of the Edifians, is waiting at the top right.

After speaking with Raum, we see a scene of Rival raising the Grand Knott (tower/weapon thing, kinda reminds me of Vane from Lunar). You'll be teleported back to the teleporters, where we can now take on Azul.

If there's any PA's you want to do in Ava City, do them now. I'm not sure if they become unavailible after the events of the second tower / talking to the leader after completing both towers...

Azul - Left Start by heading left and down through a hidden path. Step into the pool/teleporter. Grab the treasure and go up. This is where the official guide said to go first, but we need an orb first to open the door. Go back to the entrance, go down and right, right, down and you'll get a Devil Egg in the treasure box. Go back to the entrance and go all the way left and down to get the Devil Fruit. Go back to the entrance a third time, go right through the pool and up, up, then right. You'll see a hole. Put the Devil Fruit there. Do the same thing in the next room with the Devil Egg, then move the two blocks to the lit up areas in their rooms to unlock a pool teleport back near the red shark.

Love the Tria reference lol These guys were so immersion breaking / over the top I loved it

Go through, grab the Blue Orb, and go back. If you go down, left, up there is another block to move (it doesnt change anything yet). Return to the entrance and go all the way left and get on the teleporter. Defeat the two fish to open the doors. Make your way upward until you see another block to move. This time it changes something. Go down and right through the pool teleporter. Grab the item and go back, go up to another pool teleporter. You can skip the first one, but the second teleporter has a Star Cloak you'll really want for a mage. Go back to where you moved the block on the same floor (left, up) and go left through the hidden passage. Go back to the entrance after grabbing the Green Orb. You may want to leave/restock and come back because the boss is soon. There's one orb left. From the entrance go left, down, through the teleporter, then up through the door we can now open. Toss the cap on one of the mages and get the Red Orb. Now we can open the boss door, so prepare/save and head up to put the orbs into the door with the red hinges (similar to the Green orb door we just busted up). You gotta defeat all the enemies. A few Thunderbolts take out the crab. I just ran from the dragon guys since they waste so much MP. A few Thunderstorms took out the boss really quick!

Yeah, this is a lot like Vane’s destruction but in reverse lol

After you go back to Aqua and watch Rival and Ava City duke it out. We learn Rival powered Grand Knott with the Palantir Stone. The Edifians confirm Ava City is destroyed.

Remember those damn elevator ruins from early game? Yeah... :/ Rival has nestled Grand Knott into it and is waiting for us to stop her. They explain the Leviabor Ruins have powers of the ancient race and it's needed to power Grand Knott, which is docked and free to enter. Except for a barrier, which they can get rid of, so who cares. Anyway, I'd prep by trying to make better weapons, armor, and items. Make food, curatives, ect. Then when you're ready, go to Ava City and the Leviabor Ruins. This isn't the final dungeon, by the way. For some reason the game is gonna continue quite awhile. Luckily there is a final city soon that has a ton of good stuff, so you can probably trudge through the 10 Seals and Leviabor fairly easily. We'll see...

Let’s take a detour with...

Private Action Palooza! (aka A lot of PAs...)

There aren't many PAs in this game, but I wanted to go see any still left. There's a few more late game that get you some ultimate weapons, apparently, so I don't want to miss them and I'll include them in this guide. I'll note if there's any that were missed based on time (since some may have closed after the events at Ax/Azul)

Okay, it’s wierd controlling Claude again... :p

Opera, is this necessary??

Spaceship - Chisato OUT - Speak to Chisato to gain her ultimate weapon, the Mirage. (A SO2 reference maybe?)

Ultimate Weapons

You'll notice they have 0 stats. It's because you need a Blue Sphere (Alchemy) and to take them to the guy in... Knott, I think? I'll have to double check.

Road to Knott (Go to Vanis City south exit, down, right, right, down) - Chisato IN, Dias OUT - DiasxChisato shippers will love this PA--Chisato tells Dias it's dangerous to be out in the wild alone and that first impressons are important. She basically says his aloof and succinct words make it hard for the party to understand where he's coming from and everyone worries.)

Ava City - Opera IN, Celine OUT - After completing Ax/Azul / Before Ava is destroyed / Bowman daughter PA can't have been seen (?) - Obviously I couldn't do this one for multiple reasons...

Slave Village (upper right house) - Opera, Dias IN, Leon, Bowman OUT - Leon and Bowman are playing a card game. Bowman lectures Leon on thinking too much about the game, which is causing Leon's losing streak. Dias lectures them for being nonchalant when the world needs saving, but agrees breaks are good, so Bowman offers to play. Opera taught them the game (from Earth - Hanafuda).

Vanice City (go right twice from entrance) - Bowman IN, Opera, Ernest OUT - Bowman sees Opera buying a ton of alcohol. Opera offers Bowman some (apparently the alcohol is better than Earth) and I agreed to let Bowman live it up. They go back to the inn to drink. Eventually, Bowman passes out and Opera keeps drinking. It wouldn't be Star Ocean without someone getting shitfaced, you know? Opera leaves to buy more when she runs out and Ernest brings Bowman back to the ship, telling him not to attempt to keep up with Opera again... lol

Road to Knott (Exit Knott) - Precis IN, Opera OUT - Opera's gun is veering left, so Opera asks if Precis can fix it. Opera's good with machines, but not computer parts... I agreed for Precis to look at it. Opera declines though, scared Precis will return it over-designed. I asked Opera after the PA, too, and Precis gets all mad because Opera won't let her within 10 feet of the gun in fear Precis will make it into an automaton...

Knott (second floor item shop) - Opera IN, Precis OUT - Precis comments on Knott's dark atmosphere, compared to her school. Opera mentions El was a scholar... I think this is a mistranslation as she probably said "Ern", meaning Ernest.

Spaceship - Ashton OUT - Ashton gives you his ultimate weapon 83 Inn's Claw (ROM) / Gine's Claw (Japanese website translation--I think this might be XINE?! Did XINE hand over a talon?!). Ashton says that Gyoro and Ururun want him to use the weapon, but Ashton says it was a gift from (Rasugas)? Does he mean Lasguss (mountains)? Perhaps from his home town that was scrapped in SO2? He says it has the spirit of a djinn inside. I swear I read in an interview Ashton's hometown had something to do with a djinn...

Note before these two PAs, bring Ashton and Claude with you. Dias should be able to handle any enemies. Do NOT bring Precis or Opera.

Gravis Forest (Summit, where the boss was) - Ashton IN, Precis OUT - Ashton asks Precis if she can repair the ship soon. Precis says that means she'll go back to Earth and Ashton to Expel. Since they're supposed to be canonical in a way, I stated 'We'll be seperated again'. Precis tells Ashton he hasn't changed in two years, because he's sad about being seperated again. Precis says it's a good thing he hasn't changed, giggles, and runs off.

Ah, if I'd known about this... I'd brought Claude, too... If you do take my advice, try going down one screen and returning to see if the PA triggers, otherwise you may have to backtrack like I did. If you're lost, just keep heading up from the Hideout as best you can. It doesn't take too long as the enemies that remain go down really quick.

Gravis Forest (Summit) - Claude IN, Opera OUT - Claude snaps Opera out of reading a book. She's exploring the wreckage of her ship and gathering things she might want to keep. I was curious so I asked 'What were you reading?' The Armoured Death and the Knight of Fire are what Claude notices. He says they're very military, even noting Opera's jacket. However, Opera hates war, she just likes good stories that are fiction and finds her jacket comfortable. When Opera mentions a far off planet, Claude reminds Opera that he's part of the Pangalactic Federation (she forgot!)

Nusa Beach (use the Crash Forest entrance) - Rena IN, Chisato OUT - Chisato is worried about the universe constantly at war, saying the Nedians were a peaceful people. I told her 'There's hope in the future' basically. If you talk to Chisato after, she says because of the events two years ago, she became a Battle Reporter, specifically. :)

Road to Gravis (Had to look up where this was... It's the area with the tower where Maria was, so go to Knott and use the back door where Rival used to hang out. Travel down the ladder, through the little tunnel, and you'll see Celine when you exit.) - Rena IN, Celine OUT - Rena finds Celine looking pale. I said 'I'm more worried'. Celine says a bug fell on her (reminds me of the trope they used in the EX anime) If you talk to Celine after, Rena says bugs don't bother her much.

Scream (2F of Serpent Ruins, teleport to Serpent Ruins, leave, head right, then head for the top right of the dungeon) - Rena IN - Defeat the bird. The lady with the bento will die. Use Rena's Rebirth to revive them. This ability seems to be finicky? I guess use it in front of the "block" of floor where the lady died, and it should revive her. If you go to the back there's now a jam shop. Let me tell you, I was so mad lol I was hoping it would have the Aloe Jam that was so useful in SO2... NONE of the jams restore MP... FML. Buy the Blueberry Jam (20% HP restore) at least for dungeon crawling, otherwise this was pointless for the effort involved...

Lung (item shop) - Requires Bowman's daughter PA to have been done - Celine IN, Bowman OUT - Bowman needs help deciding what to get, a dress for Nineh or a toy for Erys. Yeah, the toy seems the better choice, but it's trash compared to the Marvel Dress you get otherwise. (Marvel from SO1? Interesting lol) Move the Star Cloak to Rena and give Celine the massive boost from the Marvel Cloak.

That's all for now! :o We've only got a few PAs left for later... Where were we? Right, Leviabor Ruins...

Due to issues with Tumblr, please be patient. I’m tired of editing/saving 3x just to make updates to this post. It is very exhausting. Fix your shit Tumblr.

FINAL PART OF GUIDE, CLICK HERE

[rosenongrata]

solitary solidarity – iv

Summary: A selection of writings that explore the early days of the odd relationship between Doctor Veritas Ratio and Missus Kagome Ikeda.

A/N: so i actually finished this last night, but just posting it now cuz i may have promptly fallen asleep once i was done lol

c.w/s: varies on what part, but i'll make sure to mark each addition with the proper tags in the a/n. OC-insert. c.ws for chapter: im actually not sure how to put this, but implications to abuse ig?? nothing is explicitly mentioned but it's possible to tell shits wrong between Kagome and her husband (also he calls her a whore once). soft Ratio hours (again). Kagome dissociates pretty hard for half of the chapter

w.c: ~1.4k

The two esteemed scholars had been chatting during lunch today – while Dr. Ratio prefers eating by himself in the sweet, sweet privacy of his office; he chose to accommodate Kagome’s wishes to be in the cafeteria instead for today. He knows well that she’s not the most sociable, so her eagerness to be in the populated cafeteria instead of her office strikes him as odd.

At least, that’s what he was thinking prior to a man with a head of black hair and a pair of tired brown eyes showing up – he even has a disgustingly sweet smile plastered on his face while he stands behind her. When the man brushes his fingers along Kagome’s shoulder, she nearly snaps her lacquered wood chopsticks in half.

“Hey, dear,” He says lightly, “I decided to visit you at your office today! It sure is nice here.” He grasps her shoulder tenderly, but that’s what makes Kagome’s skin crawl.

“Good afternoon, Shoto,” Kagome quickly composes herself, the life and color draining from her expression and eyes – Dr. Ratio didn’t expect to see her eyes to somehow grow even more lifeless.

“Ah, so this is…” The doctor’s eyes flick up and down Shoto’s figure, “…your husband.” Dr. Ratio says, his arms firmly crossed – looking unamused as he always does.

Shoto’s smile cracks a little from irritation, but is swiftly repaired within moments.

“This must be your…friend, right?” Shoto asks his lovely wife.

“…Yes, I’m her friend.” Dr. Ratio answers for her – he can see her inattention to her surroundings written all over her features. It’s a half-lie, but he deems it necessary for his plan to get her husband out of here – away from her. The other day with her – when she had punched him in the face – was all he needed to know about this man.

“Anyway,” Shoto turns his attention back onto Kagome, and the doctor swears he can see her curl a little bit away from her husband, “I got you a gift, dear! I’m sure you’ll love it. Here,” He pulls out a thin rectangular black box before opening it, revealing a pair of black gloves, “New gloves!”

“Oh, uhm… Th-thank you, Shoto…” She shakily sets her chopsticks down, staring down at the brand-new gloves before her.

(…He’s love-bombing her. Why am I not surprised…) Dr. Ratio ponders, eyes narrowing at the shorter man.

“C’mon, put them on. They’re very soft!” Shoto pressures.

“But… Shoto, you know that—” Kagome grimaces slightly, refusing to meet her partner’s eyes that grow with impatient anger.

People in the cafeteria begin watching more intently – gossiping amongst themselves. Not even so-called geniuses are immune to the flavorful taste of brewing drama. And then Shoto grabs her wrist, ready to pluck off her old gloves – the ones that have been patched over and over again, sewn back together numerous times over the years.

“Here, I’ll help you!” He chirps, his voice so fake it’s painful – to the doctor, at least.

Dr. Ratio rolls his dichromatic eyes before standing up abruptly – Kagome fully expects him to leave, she wouldn’t blame him for it, either. But, instead, the scholar grabs the other man’s wrist with a near death grip – leaving a burn ache in Shoto.

“You need to leave.” He mutters to the smaller man, glaring down at him, “You’ve wasted enough of everyone’s time.” If there’s one thing Dr. Ratio is – without a doubt – it’s fearless. “Especially Kagome’s.” He grumbles.

“What’s it to you?” Shoto bites back with a nasty grin, but the stronger man can feel him tremble with fear in his grasp.

“To be frank, it’s none of your business – nor is it any of your business to be pestering Kagome, me, and the rest of the Guild.”

“Very funny. Anyway,” Shoto pushes the doctor off with some ease, but only because Dr. Ratio allowed him to – he’s waiting for the husband to make another mistake, “We’re going, Kagome. We have business to attend to…away from these lovely people.” He throws a glaring glance at the opposing man before grabbing Kagome’s arm and roughly tugging her up to her feet.

“…That’s your last mistake, Shoto.” Dr. Ratio huffs, “I can either call security or…you can leave Kagome behind – here in the Guild.”

Weighing his options, Shoto scoffs at him and releases his wife’s now tender arm, “Fine, then. I’ll leave…” His voice lowers to a dark whisper, “She’s a good for nothing whore, anyway.” He glares into her unfocused eyes, “Look at her… She can’t even make a peep – tsk.” He rolls his eyes before departing.

Dr. Ratio says nothing to him, instead wrapping one arm around Kagome’s drooping shoulders as a way of keeping her upright. When he glances at the remaining people in the cafeteria, he notices they’re still talking with each other about Aeons knows what – most likely that little scene, he wagers.

“…Can you hear me, Kagome?” He whispers to her, and she fails to respond – her expression completely despondent and her eyes absent of awareness. “I will take that as a no.” He sighs.

He quickly cleans up her lunch materials, putting her bento box back together before leading her out of the cafeteria – anywhere that’s quiet and isolated will have to do. And he knows the perfect place – his office in the medical quarters.

They walk there, and each time she stumbles on her weakened legs, he catches her without too much thought about it. He assists her the whole way there – regardless of how slow she walks and no matter how many times she stumbles. And if he ends up having to carry her, he’ll do that, too.

Arriving in his office, Dr. Ratio helps Kagome settle down on the sofa in the quaint room before taking a seat at his desk. He swivels his chair in her direction – folding one leg over the other and resting his hands on his raised knee, they intertwine to form an overall scrutinizing posture.

Her eyes flutter shut, covering her lifeless stare that had been glued to the wall moments ago. It takes many minutes of pure silence – including the doctor removing his gaze from her, instead staring at the floor – before she can form words, let alone a single sound.

“Mmh…” She groans, pressing two fingers to her now-aching forehead – he can immediately tell it’s a tension headache that shoots through her skull.

Yet his offer for medication goes unheard for several moments as she rubs her head. When her mind finally processes that someone was speaking to her moments ago, her eyes shoot open and she finally spots him on the other side of the room.

“Did…did you say something?” She inquires; voice broken and weak.

His gaze is firmly on her figure, but not as firm as it often is – it’s softened, keeping his grumpiness low to avoid scaring her and worsening her condition.

“I asked if you would like some medication – for your tension headache, to be precise.” He replies.

“Uhm…” She sways a little in her seat, eyes losing focus again while her hand falls to her lap.

He sighs softly, turning away in his chair and grabbing a small bottle of headache relief medication from a drawer in his desk. He twists open the cap, taking a single pill out, and striding over to her after grabbing a cup of cool water from the water dispenser.

“You should take it,” He hands her the pill by taking her hand and placing it on her open palm, “At the very least, it will ease the inflammation.”

She gives him a small nod before taking the pill with water as instructed. He then rests the little white cup on the coffee table nearby. When he turns to return to his desk, he feels a weak tug at the tail of his clothes.

“Do you need something else?” He inquires as softly as he can as he turns back toward her – he’s well-aware that he sounds far too strict for his own good right now.

“Stay…” She breathes, the words coming from her held together by a thinning thread.

“I was not going to leave you alone. You are in no shape for isolation.” He reassures and takes a seat next to her once she releases his clothes.

“Thank you…” She whispers, her eyes falling shut again.

And without warning, she falls against his broad shoulder – her head resting there limply. He visibly stiffens – back straightening like a board and arms flexing into knots. When he hears sudden soft snores coming from her, he sighs in relief – his body deflating. He stays still for now, eyes scanning her peaceful features before glancing to the floor.

(…That’s that for now, then.) He sighs mentally, (But I know that this is only one facet of her – too much deeply troubles her. She’s not bored and emotionless by nature – no one is.)

[atlasisnothere]

Hello sorry to bother you but I noticed your Dinluke Tangled fic has been deleted on AO3 and was wondering if you were aware of this or if it was accidental? I really loved that fic (and I know heaps of others do too) and I’m saddened to see it go but I will respect your decision if you did remove it intentionally. I just wish I could’ve saved/downloaded it sooner 😭

So, I've actually been meaning to make a post about this (sorry Vanilla, I know this ask has been sitting in my inbox for a long time!) This post will ramble on a bit, but moral of the story is, I am in the process of editing and making tweaks to the fic to reupload it onto AO3 as an orphaned work. Further explanations will be below the cut but feel free to move on, they’re not that important, lol!

When I deleted my fic last year, it was at a time where the dinluke fandom, somewhere I had found so much joy and solace in for over a year, had become a place that just started to make me uncomfortable. I avoided the tags, I downloaded a few of my favourite fics from my favourite authors (who are still some of my beloved mutuals <3) and moved on.

The fic in question, a tangled AU I had written back in 2021, was probably the most prevalent work I had created for the fandom. I wrote it in a time where I needed something light-hearted and warm and fun to write, and writing this fic really did bring me so much joy. Even more so was the response that it received while I was publishing it. I could tell that there were readers who enjoyed reading it for the exact same reasons that I enjoyed writing it, and hearing everyone’s thoughts and feedback every week is part of what made writing this fic so special. Every fic author understands how wonderful it is to share your work with an audience and be able to talk about it with them.

But then the dinluke discourse became more prevalent, and I started noticing more comments on the fic that interpreted the ship and the ‘roles’ of the characters in a way that ... didn’t really make me comfortable. Yes, I had Din as the ‘Flynn Rider’ character and Luke as the ‘Rapunzel’ character, but I felt that that best represented their characters in canon - with Din as the seemingly rough on the outside but warm on the inside one often brushing against the law, and Luke as the driven, optimistic, and sometimes reckless one who is endlessly hopeful. But there were some people in the comments who just wanted to see luke as a typical damsel-in-distress disney princesss, which isn’t what I wanted, or wrote, at all.

And so, having removed myself from the fandom, I removed the fic, too. Looking back, even though I don’t regret what motivated this decision, I do regret removing it from AO3 so quickly and without warning. I know there were people who loved it - I did too - and if I had known more about the option to simply orphan a fic and leave it up on AO3, just not associated with your account, then I think I would have done that instead. But at that point in time, the fic just served as a reminder of how hostile some parts of the fandom had grown, and how I didn’t fully feel comfortable being in a fandom I loved anymore. I didn’t even think I’d ever come back.

But now I am, lol. I’ve reached a point now where I’m comfortable existing in my own corner of the fandom, discussing the ship with my mutuals and sharing content with them, and that’s brought back a lot of the joy that I’d missed. I’d even started to go back to my google doc with the tangled AU fic’s original draft, going through and editing and tweaking it just to remember that joy of writing it. And so, I decided that I want to put it back up onto AO3. I’ll republish the chapters once I’ve finished editing them (the first few are already done) and once it’s all back up, I’ll orphan the fic. That way it’ll be there for all of those who had originally joined me in the journey of writing it, who made me smile every week with their wonderful comments. The fic has always been for them.

Anyways, that got a little melodramatic, lol. I’ll probably start publishing the first couple chapters later today. Other than this post, I probably won’t be mentioning it much more on this account, and simply moving on with the dinluke (and now jedi fallen order oops) brainrot 😂. Stay well everyone! xx

[514ko]

YNaM Retrospectives – Chap. II

         It’s me again, back with another chapter of my Retrospectives~  Just in time too, for the second Koishi day, apparently…  Anyway, I’m not too sure of the ethical considerations of making these sorts of posts with YNaM still unfinished, but a few people seemed to enjoy the last one, and that’s more than enough for me!

         Here’s a link to Chap. II, the chapter in question:

          Y’know, as I keep writing these, it feels like I’m veering into writingcraft more and more.  So I’d like to address something—basically, that I’m still very much an amateur!  While I’ve been writing for a good bit (12-ish years), and I like to think I have some things nailed down, I’m far from an expert.  I’ve never actually published anything (not that I’ve tried), and a lot of what I “know” I learned from trial-and-error, just figuring out what I liked and didn't. It feels kind of...self-important, in a way, writing about what I think as if I somehow know what I’m doing.  But then again, I feel the same way about posting on Twitter, and everybody already does that, so maybe it’s just me?

          So I’ll just put it like this (and never mention it again):  I like explaining how I think of things, but I don’t know if they’re right!  I’m just a hobbyist who loves Touhou yuri, trying to get better at writing~  I’m just super happy and grateful people enjoy my work!

          Anyway, now that that’s out of the way—Scene 1!

          So in my last post, I mentioned how I always felt Flan’s reaction to Remi setting her up to be at the party was a little melodramatic—well, it seems 2021 me agreed with me!  God, like half of Chap. II S1 is just me backpedaling on that.  Like, I had Flan’s outburst to give her some agency and build tension, but a) she’s not stupid, and b) she can’t be annoying to the reader, so I had to resolve it as quickly as possible (from Flan’s perspective, anyway).  From what I’ve seen in other media, making a character super whiny or stubborn over trivial things is a great way to make your whole audience hate them.  I was really scared of that, back in the day.  And even now, it’s a line I have to toe constantly, since so much of the conflict in YNaM is introspective and psychological…

          Fun fact!  I quite like putting references to other stories in YNaM, and Chap. II S1 has the first of them.  When Flan is describing Satori and Koishi, she mentions their eyes as “just flopping around”—this is a turn of phrase/running gag from the KoiFlan fic Bloody Retrograde Prequel Vignettes, by SumDumMuffin.

          God I love Vignettes so much.  It’s a bit flawed, and it wasn’t ever finished (I sob), but I love it so, so much.  It’s tragic yet sweet, doesn’t infantilize Flan, and there are some great headcanons to boot (indecipherable Scottish Yuugi, truly incredible headcanon); like, Koishi and Flandre just have so much chemistry and heart to them...   It wasn’t what got me into KoiFlan shipping (I have Yohane to thank for that), but it was what turbocharged it to OTP levels.

          Honestly, Vignettes being left unfinished for so long was what pushed me over the edge in writing YNaM in the first place!  Back in late 2020, I’d been reading Touhou and yuri for years, and already liked KoiFlan, but I loved Vignettes so much that once I got to end and realized it was unfinished, my heart hurt.  Around the same time, I decided to dip my toe in the water of Touhou fanfiction with that year’s NaNoWriMo, for which I did a gen adventure fic with Kagerou as MC (that will never see the light of day).  So, of course, I rode a massive wave of misguided confidence all through the rough draft of YNH/YNaM, thinking I could fully finish YNaM in like, six months—at which point I realized I had no idea how much work it took to actually make a longfic, much less a good longfic…  Makes the 100k words of Vignettes seem herculean to me now…

          As a result, I'm determined to see YNaM through to completion.  I’m still a long way from completing that goal (and honestly things looked a little shaky there for awhile), but I’m trying my best!  Doing these little side projects help too; they’re kind of like burnout prevention measures lol       

          Anyway, on to Scene 2—I actually remember this scene quite well because of how inordinately difficult it was to write at the time.  For one, it required actual research (gasp), but also because I had to finalize this same scene twice.

          See, when I was originally hashing out Flan and Koi’s character dynamics in YNH, Koishi was very different.  She was much more quiet, reserved, and flat—basically, the way she acts towards Flan in this scene, only all the time.  She had a distinct speech style too—stiff, formal, and no contractions.  Like, I had a reason for it—it not only Flan’s speech style on the page, but also contrasted open-eye Koishi vs canon closed-eye Koishi.  So I thought it fit.  But, when it came time to convert YNH into YNaM, I completed Scene 2 with that original characterization—and it just felt so off.  The character I’d written wasn’t Koishi, it was an OC masquerading as Koishi.  And worse, that character didn’t even work—I had pages upon pages of stilted speech, dull dynamics (because Flan and OC!Koishi were too similar to one another), and a character that just didn’t feel anything like Koishi.

          I’ll elaborate more on this at some point, cuz I could write a whole article on this, but—even though I’m writing an AU, I still want the characters to be recognizable as themselves.  Otherwise, what’s the point of writing fanfiction?  I dunno, it’s important to me that YNaM Flan feels like an interpretation of Flandre, rather than someone different, someone alien.  Cuz there’s a difference, in my eyes.  Like, I really hope that even though she has a conscious mind, YNaM Koishi still feels like Koishi, even if we only get to see it when she’s happy.

          Now, this is all rendered incredibly ironic considering Chap. III, but I digress.

          Anyway, I finally had the good sense to redo Koishi’s characterization.  But I’d already finalized Scene 2, so I had to rip apart a functioning scene and redo all the dialogue.  A little tedious, but no problem, right?  But transliterating the dialogue wrecked the flow, Koishi’s new personality completely flipped the character dynamics, and above all I needed to make Koishi more expressive without clashing with Flandre, and through doing all this I’d completely destroyed the momentum of the scene—it was a mess. A step away from a total rewrite.

          Even reading it back now, I feel like it’s held together with prosaic duct-tape (particularly towards the middle), but at least I finished it.  That’s the important part, and the part I learned from.

          So yeah!  That’s all I have to say about Chap. II.  Tune in next week for my thoughts on Chap. III—and god knows I have a bone to pick with that one.

          Oh also—I’ll announce this on my Twitter at some point, but I’m gonna start taking oneshot suggestions now~  If you're reading this and you have an idea or situation for a short KoiFlan fic, feel free to shoot me a message over here on Tumblr and maybe I'll write it out! (I mean, you could use the bird app too, but since Elon is nuking DMs for some reason I thought I’d mention it here first).  Like, In Sickness and in Health was just me prompting myself to do a sickfic, lol. I’ve never done something like this before, but it seems like a fun challenge!

          PS: I died laughing reading back that old A/N.  Particularly the words “mostly happy romance story”.  Yeah, because that’s totally what YNaM is, right…?  Just a happy romance story, nothing to see here…

[umbralsound-xiv]

Volunteer.

I figure i’d wait a bit for him to simmer. Whole thing sounded like a mess. Viera walked in, Viera carried out.

...Ain’t get a good look at him, but... Can’t say he didn’t pique my interest.

Didn’t hurt to ask.

Vairg knocks a short, rhythmic sound on the outside of Grym's office door. Some time had passed since the other Viera had been carried back through it, and only when Vairg had felt it had been enough did he opt to disturb Grym's peace once again.

Grymahtyn lofted a brow at the knock. "Enter." His voice was loud, as ever - well heard through the door even if he didn't shout. He finished whatever writing he was in the process of, promptly stuffing the quill into its inkpot.

Vairg pushes the door open with a single sharp shove; just enough to step through the opening as it swung closed behind him. "Boss." Was the first word out of Vairg's mouth, as it ever was during a greeting, half dipping his head. "Got yourself a Viera." Cutting straight to the point, his tone almost seemed to loft at the prospect.

Grymahtyn: "Vairg." He returned as a greeting, leaning himself back in his seat. "We did. A mouthy one, at that."

Vairg: "Heard as much. Hard not to. Walked in. Dragged out. Couldn't help but hear the voices." His head slowly turns in that curious sort of way it often did. "He important?"

I was so hoping he wasn’t that important. Not important enough to keep from harm’s reach, anyway. I do like meeting other Viera! I do!

I like to know if there’s another out there that could come close to besting me, but judging by the perfomance i heard in here, i doubt it.

Still... Even with that dissappointment. I’m sure i could get some fun out of him.

Grymahtyn: "For now." Grymahtyn exhaled. "Bait for my runaway pet, hopefully a useful one."

Vairg: "For now." Vairg echoed. Still, it saught to wipe the smirk off his face for a moment, if only to briefly turn it into a contemplative frown. But the often worn smile is quick to make a return. "I'd like to meet him. Who've you got guarding him? I want their post."

Mmmm. Important. More to do with that Seeker girl he’s been after for fuck knows how long. Better not be too rough with him. Wonder if the Boss needs him to talk?

I like making people talk. I’m a great conversationalist.

Grymahtyn arched a brow at Vairg, head tilting. "Esunaux." The name left him more akin to a curse, irritation for the Wildwood's decades old failure lingering -still-. "You want to babysit him? I can't promise it'll be a particularly fun duty for you."

Vairg: "Better me than a fuck-up, if he's so important, yeah? Job done proper and all that." A pause, as he idly taps his foot, mulling. "...Any plans for him besides?"

Grymahtyn: "Mmhm.. You're not wrong." He grumbled, leaning back more fully in his seat. "It depends on X'llaya. If his presence here works as intended and bring her back to me, or if he's not important enough to her. It's between selling him or killing him."

Vairg: "I want to look after him until then." He said, as though any other outcome would have been considered. "What are the stipulations?"

Grymahtyn: "His survival is the only requirement, preferably that he remains conscious but it's not a necessity until I contact X'llaya. You are otherwise free to hurt him."

Oh, excellent.

I’ll try to keep him concious. Not sure how flimsy he is. Didn’t look like a big guy, but being carried about by Ket doesn’t help.

I’ll see. I’ll see soon.

Vairg: "I won't kill him. Where's the fun in that? I'll be his personal escort. Free Ket up for more important shit, yeah?" The grin had widened a little unsettlingly so, as Vairg tapped his toes, pacing side to side for a few moments.

Grymahtyn: "Very well. You'll take over Esunaux's duties involving the Viera, do you wish to tell him such yourself?"

Vairg: "Course." Vairg grins. "Don't worry, Boss. I'll make him feel... Welcome. Can't promise about the conciousness bit, though. But i won't do nothing a healer can't fix."

Grymahtyn: "Fine by me."

Vairg: "Sounds good." His expression doesn't move an ilm, simply holding eye contact with Grym for a little longer in silence, soon turning for the door and leaving the way he came.

I’ll tell that useless sack of shit to find something more within his capabilities, and take a seat. I’ll listen. I’m a good listener.

...At least i’ll have some entertainment for the next few suns.