#anyway my mom said it was extremely not normal and now I'm wondering if this actually isnt something everyone does

[dawntheduckrb]

Would you look at that, it's the consequences of my actions

Does anyone else just chew out the entire inner lining of their mouth? It's not that uncommon, right? :')

[lara4eclipze]

“teach me”

sypnosis; you weren't exactly dumb but we're lazy yet when she started teaching you your grades went up—what did she do to make that happen

cw; age gap! y/n is 19 Lara is 23 , mean , teasing , smut , face sitting , dirty talk ,spoiled and rich y/n, inspired by this

original idea;@ivemiese / thankss

ALSOO happy birthday my love Lara!! , I'm so happy she's turning 19!! , gosh heres a birthday fic for the rajberries!

to say you were failing was an understatement your grades were plunging down the toilet yet you didn't do anything to change it

your parents were rich anyways you'll get the company by 5 more years , there's no point in studying

well your parents cared about your grades , tutor after tutor yet nothing worked , either you were mean to them or they quit out of pity for you

"mom I told you already these tutors are just not helping" you pout to your mom knowing she'll always fall for it

"well I still got you one — my friend Mitra recommended her to me" your mom sighs

you grunt in frustration, running up to your room muttering some profanity under your breath

—ʚɞ

school was as boring as everyday , you hated this place I mean you went to a very expensive university yet you can't seem to find people you would like to interact with

"disgusting" you scoff as an student accidentally bumps into you

after school was as worse, well atleast now you can rot in bed or go in a shopping spree

"darling your tutor came early today , shes in you room" your mother says to you before going out the door

your mom associates herself with other housewives of rich men , you told her countless times she'll just get influenced by those big head women but she never listened

you enter your room after you change into some oversized tee and short shorts

"hi there" the girl waves at you , oh. my. god. she was hot , gorgeous , smart based on how she's supposed to tutor you and god she looked so fine

"hi..y/n's the name" you said sitting next to her , shamefully (or not so) you check her out , her waist was beautiful her finger were long you wonder how it will feel inside of you

"Lara — raj , anyways I'll tutor you math and science for about 4 hours today" she said , she noticed how you didn't respond so she tsks

well that's until she realizes what you were doing...

"hey didn't your mother teach you checking out people is extremely perverted... especially when they're older than you?" she said her voice lowering

"what? I didn't — pfft what?" you try to play it off but judged by the smirk on her face you knew it wouldn't work

—✧˖*°࿐

after the day she quizzed you on the topic to make sure you understood it

"2/10? are you serious?" she questions

"what?" you ask as if it's normal

"you answered me flawlessly earlier" she reasons

"well maybe I need motivation" you snap back

her gears were turning but an idea struck her

"alright then"

obviously the time was done so she had to go, what a great start you thought, Great thing your tutor now was not boring

admittedly she is hot , a hot nerd you thought to yourself

—✧˖*°࿐

you try to find her social media online and see that she was older than you

"23?, not bad" you sigh

she posted loads of pictures, videos she looked well off why is she wasting her time tutoring spoiled rich kids then?

—✧˖*°࿐

the next day you didn't go to school since you were just lazy, plus what were you gonna do there anyways?

sit down and learn where and when Picasso farted?

although excitingly your pretty tutor was still coming today , you decided to go the extra mile and get ready for her wearing some of your skimpiest outfits

"you look great honey" your mom pipes up as she leaves the house

now we wait , you slouch in your room waiting for her , until..

"hey" she enters your room escorted by your maid

"oh hi.." you said back , deciding to pull your top down a bit

her eyes trailed down , you smirk at her reaction, ahh the hard work paid off i guess

"can we do math first" you plead to her giving her your best weapon ,doe eyes

she reluctantly agreed , chuckling at your actions

god she looked amazing with her glasses , her pierced nose, you can't even focus on what she's teaching you

"do you get it?" she asks

"yes" you replied

"okay then let's quiz you..— you know since yesterday I saw how you looked at me , so let's play a game"

"for every score over 5 you get a special prize , if you get anything lower well it sucks to be you cause you won't get anything" the older says , your eyes lit up at the mentions of prize

"alright then" you said

—✧˖*°࿐

"9/10?.. pretty good" she purrs , god her voice was like heroin so addicting but so bad for you

"tell me when you don't feel comfortable okay?" she asks , fuck being confused you needed her in you NOW

"mhm" you hum out , your heart thumping in synch with her movements her hands in your inner thighs her other one flipping up your skirt

soaked , wet , whatever it was you just needed her so bad

she ties up her hair , some strands falling to frame her face , her breathing gets heavy , the view was amazing, shes quite literally face to face with your cunt ,

"fucking slut" she tsks as she pulls away your undergarments a string of your nectar connecting it to your cunt

"'m not" you were but it felt humiliating , in a good way cause as much as you hate to admit it her degrading you with that voice is just perfect

a beat passes by and her tongue , it felt perfect, gosh her tongue passed by your tight entrance every now and then

"fuck please!" you whine , you felt like you were gonna orgasm just by this yet you needed more

"greedy girl" she says in a condescending tone , mocking the way you whined for her

finally she enters your slick entrance , her tongue reaching places you never thought of

your head lolled back as you moan her name like a mantra , your hands entangled in her hair as you push her head

"right nghm there!" you moan as she hits a particularly gummy spot in you

she chuckles , the vibration sending shockwaves through you , your eyes seeing stars your mouth open drooling due to the fact you can't go a second without moaning or even whining for her

"you close? — your greedy cunny is sucking me in" the older says as she redoubled her efforts her nose bumping your clit every now and then

"shit please! let me cum!" yes it was pathetic, but it felt oh so right ,

"hold it in for me princess" she replied

"please"

"do it or you won't get to finish at all" she threatens , her voice lowering

tears start to fall on your face due to the pleasure, sniffling while moaning, that's new

—✧˖*°࿐

"oh darling are you guys done already?" Lara bumps into your mom as she was going out the door

"yes ma'am , glad to see her improve" the red head replied

"I'm so thankful for you , I haven't seen y/n get along with any of her tutor before" the older woman excitedly said

"must be special then" Lara teased

—✧˖*°࿐

"6/10? what happened honey?" The older asks looking at your paper

your frown at her , what are you gonna get now :((

"don't worry lets make a compromise" she stands up locking your door slowly she removes her top

her abs were on display begging you to ride them , her boobs were perfect to be gagged on

next down was her skirt , along with her socks , shit her thighs were beautiful you itched to touch her

as your hands tried to make its way to her waist she slaps it

"ouch" you pout at her

"study next time , stupid girls don't get to have the privilege of getting fucked mkay?" she pouts back , teasing you as you practically were about to cry

"i hate you" you mumble

"we both know you don't" she replied, wearing her clothing

—✧˖*°࿐

"surprisingly miss her grades had been better , see it was D last semester now it's a B" your professor explains to your mother

you couldn't help but grin , I mean is this who she calls lazy?

maybe you were lazy but never ever were you dumb

"okay spill it what do you want for that grade" your mother says whilst in the car

"oh come on do you think of me so lowly mom?" you rhetorically ask

"but since you insist , can you schedule more of my tutoring with Lara?" you said trying to fight off smiling at the thought

"oh—i expected worse" your mother chuckles

"is that a yes?"

"obviously!" your mother replied happily

—✧˖*°࿐

"stupid slut" she whispers as her fingers hit all the right spots her lips on your neck

getting a score of 8 meant that she'll finger you, a win is a win yet it intrigued you what will you get for 10

"head filled with me fuckin her she can't even respond" she harshly said as she pinches your clit , and then going deeper

"please mo-mommy!" you didn't even realized it slipped out of your mouth till it did

"my whore" she spits as she fingers throb in pain , not a minute passed and you were gushing around them , she chuckles as her fingers dripped in your cum

"suck" she said as she forces her fingers in your mouth , she maintained eye contact as you gag around her digits

"perfect" she said afterwards, she carries you to bed making sure you were alright

"I'm okay" you reassure her

—✧˖*°࿐

school wasn't any better today , but good enough you got to recite here and there

going home was another story , everything was loud due to the party your dad hosted for his business partners or what ever they were

"god!" you scoff , as you open the door you were pulled in by Lara who giggles

"heard you had a good day?" she teases

"now your stalking me? , how interesting miss raj " you hum back

"Oh please " she laughs

she settles your bag in the chair near your desk , sitting down

"ready for your quiz" she asks smirking , she knew what she was doing and it's driving you crazy

"yes I studied hard for this one" you replied

"ooh you might just get what you deserve..." she trails off , you spot her grinning as you take the quiz

—✧˖*°࿐

you don't know if it was a miracle or just a dream but you were buried in between Laras thighs right now having the meal you much deserve after a long ass day

her low moans and wet noises make you go crazy

"fuck baby , go faster" she moans

you chuckle going even faster , like an animal who was starved for weeks , her cunt was perfect sweet and savory soft and so inviting it sucked you in practically

maybe hours passed and you were still down there , she was overstimulated but who cares fuck everything

"baby too much-"

"but" you give her the doe eyes and here she goes losing again

"fine" she said breathlessly as she lays back accepting your tongue again , your face dripped with her cum which was too perfect for her to see

—✧˖*°࿐

"Mom! Lara's staying for the night!" you scream

"fine" your mother replied

"eek she said yes! , now which one first" you said laying out a plethora of straps

"are you joking?" she asks

"no , now which one this one's cute pink and white"

[etraytin]

Swiftly Flow the Days

As promised, the weekend was low-key, volunteeringwise. We also stayed home from church because our church has a lot of senior citizens and even with masks on it felt better to not chance it. Instead I watched the service on my phone from my bathtub, which was admittedly far more comfortable than a pew though the acoustics were worse. Still no COVID symptoms at all though, so I'm thinking we're good.

Even so, kiddo and I wore masks today as we went out volunteering again, this time delivering food and water from the United Way building to people who can't get to distribution centers. They didn't have as many deliveries for us to make as I would have hoped, but it felt good to be getting stuff where it needed to go. We also went over to the World Central Kitchen mobile HQ, which was an absolute anthill of activity in the middle of downtown Asheville. They're running a massive operation down there! We were just there to pick up some food for the volunteers at the distribution place, but it was stressful because it was so very busy and there were cars and people absolutely everywhere. Very efficiently handled, I will certainly give them that, but I was glad to grab our food and skedaddle!

With volunteering done for the day, we decided to support our local businesses and go to our favorite sushi place for lunch. We sat out on the patio for safety and got our sushi rolls and it felt very much like normal except for all the people at the church across the street stopping to get potable water from the hose and pump setup they had there. Water and power are back in most of my town, and it is very busy with people from Asheville coming up for a bit of a break and a trip to the laundromat, as well as volunteers from other places staying wherever they can find a spot. No tourists, now is very much not a time for tourists, but it still feels like high season.

While we were eating, I suggested to Kiddo that we should go visit the escape room place, because I learned that it is opening again at the end of this week. We've done most of the escape rooms they have, but there is one left that we kept meaning to get to but have not yet. He liked that idea. We talked about how he's keeping up with his boyfriend and his friends from school, and I suggested maybe his boyfriend would like to come along to the escape room. Kiddo liked that idea too, but it was only later at home that I realized Kiddo really liked that idea, but he wanted to do the escape room with his boyfriend and _not_ his poor old mom. I said that was fine and even agreed to foot the bill and drive the car, but I can't help feeling just a little bummed. Escape rooms were a thing kiddo and I did together, after all, and now things are changing. Change is important, and I think it's really important for Kiddo to socialize with his peers and develop relationships and all those vital things that are maybe even more vital when the world is turned upside down. None of that keeps an extremely bathetic cover of "Sunrise, Sunset" from playing in my mind every so often. Sigh.

Anyway, more volunteering tomorrow, back at the water distribution place. It's going to be much more chilly than last week, but we have our sweaters! I also got a pair of spooky pajama pants on sale from Walmart that arrived in the mail today (along with a whole bunch of other stuff as the post office untangles its deliveries!) They are soft and have ghosts on them and they are wonderful.

[hikennosabo]

random knives thoughts (trimax vol 7)

my vol 7 post is getting long and i have so much to say about knives that i think he deserves his own post, lol. and this got way longer than i expected it would.

not sure how to structure this though. i guess i'll just... go in chapter order.

this volume is a LOT to take in, in general, but also with regards to knives specifically. we see past and present versions, and the difference is night and day.

^ i love this scene of rem scolding knives so much, because it's just so... normal. a normal mother and son interaction. he was just a normal kid.

i also love this next scene, and i want to go through it slowly.

knives is so worried about conrad's reaction to them. he can't make eye contact. his face is red. he's trying to talk politely. he's trembling and sweating. compared to vash, who looks a little concerned, but relatively nonplussed.

i love how this is the only question conrad asks, and the two of them immediately answer. that's all that's needed.

i love the panel of knives crying so much. i can't imagine him crying like this as an adult... he's so emotional about all this. and i love vash comforting him by putting his arm around him. vash has to say "thank you" because knives is crying so much he can't even speak. knives was such a sweet kid, y'all.

and then there's this. now conrad is scolding knives like a parent, too. it's just. everything about this interaction is so sweet. it almost paints a picture of what could have been. things could have been different in another timeline. ugh ugh ugh

knives being the sensitive one, and the one with so much hope and confidence that plants and humans can get along, it hurts. it's almost hard to believe that the twins basically swapped in their outlooks and attitudes from being kids to adults.

^ that being said, put a pin in this.

^ not posting this one for any particular reason other than i think that knives being a little hackerman is so cute

^ i NEED to include these panels, though, because it's such a sibling moment. if you couldn't tell (lol), i love the bits of normal familial interactions we see, and the twins' scenes specifically just serve to emphasize how wrong everything is in the present day.

"since when have we been so different?" ...the line in tristamp which kills me the most. (if this line appears in a future volume i might actually just climb right into the microwave.)

and then we get the tesla scene. it's already been discussed at length, but knives being so traumatized that he passed out is just. so much. it broke him. it broke him!! and he slept through everything after that. it seems like a small mercy, compared to vash's self-starvation and suicide attempt, but in the long run... it wasn't. he wasn't able to work through his emotions with rem like vash did. he didn't hear the blank ticket story, or see rem cry.

aaand then he wakes up and immediately pretends to have amnesia. i'm gonna be honest, i wasn't actually sure at first if he was lying or not. but his anger and grief and fear are too extreme for it to be a reaction to simply "rem calmly explaining what happened." although i also thought the twins Forgetting Traumatic Events could be like. a running thing here. maybe.

also his "?" face is so cute. (somehow i forgot to include this one in my knives baby pictures post...)

the chapter 3 title kills me btw.

"i thought it would be better if he still knew the truth." i wonder if vash blames himself for knives's breakdown because of this. (he would've had a breakdown anyway...) and there's something to be said here about vash thinking this when he's the one who ends up blocking out traumatic memories in the future. thanks to knives, no less.

his conversation with rem kills me, also. "are you trying to bear all of this by yourself?" "yeah. i am." he just. admits it. and his expressions are so muted now compared to previous chapters. rem is trying but unfortunately she didn't try hard enough.

the mom-son hug... :( the way he clings to her. he's thinking about revenge, but it's so clear that he still loves his mom.

and that leads right into this. it's still a little while in between this and knives making the ships fall, but, i don't know, with the way he breaks out of the hug, then turns away, then turns back to say thank you, it feels like this is knives's goodbye to rem. like this is when he steels his resolve, almost. maybe i'm reading too much into it, idk. plus he looks so tired. he looks more like his adult self now.

it's more like he's telling himself this, rather than telling vash. he's choosing to be angry instead of afraid. (or acting like it, at least.) and with his face in shadow like in the flashbacks earlier in the story...

^ PAGES THAT KILL ME. the last sense of normalcy right before disaster. knives's expressions don't seem insincere here. maybe he was allowing himself some happiness before the execution of his plan.

and then, of course, we see him having a fucking breakdown.

they hurt to look at, but i love these pages so much. his face divided in two by shadow, tears on one side, blood on the other... he's. conflicted about his actions, to say the least.

but when he succeeds, he has no choice but to lean into it, yknow? no time for regrets.

^ me when i lie. honey, you don't look rational.

and then we smash cut to the present day.

i love this panel. knives looks so small here.

and i ADORE this page so much. it's gorgeous; poignant, even. and we've never seen knives kneel like this before. man, this volume has such good knives images. (also i was rereading this chapter with my music on shuffle and 'take me to church' started playing while i was looking at this page. interesting experience)

there is. so much in this scene. knives expresses regret for killing plants in the big fall. knives saying - STILL saying - that he's angry rather than afraid.

a lot has been said about knives's hypocrisy already, but there's something to be said about knives criticizing humanity, and saying that humans will selfishly consume plants "like parasites"... and then essentially doing that himself. absorbing other plants so he can use their energy instead of his own.

i think the phrasing he uses is interesting, though. it's almost as if he's asking the plant rather than using force. the gentle way he puts his hand on the glass, too. showing more respect to her than to his own brother. i mean, i guess it doesn't really matter because non-independent plants don't have free will anyway(?), and maybe that's exactly why he's acting like this(??), but. idk. it's interesting.

^ including this page for no reason other than it fucks severely.

and then finishing the chapter and seeing the chapter title again is just. ugh. like, so much happens in between the start and the end that you kinda forget what the title is and then it hits you like a truck. king of loneliness.

^ another page i'm including for the sole reason that it fucks severely.

^ yet ANOTHER spread that i absolutely adore, but i have more to say about it this time lol. i'm obsessed with how beautiful this page is, it's a renaissance painting to me. it's just the contrast of it all. knives, the villain, in a delicate pose, juxtaposed against the body horror, sleeping peacefully with fabric draped all around. the majority of the spread being white creates a sense of purity and also contrasts beautifully with the use of black in the other two knives spreads i posted above. instantly one of my favorite pages in the manga. and he's absorbed, what, three or four plants by now? making his aura so powerful even when he's asleep. which makes this image of him snoozing even more uncanny in context.

...now that i think about it, knives sleeps a lot, doesn't he? he's essentially "asleep" at the beginning of the manga until he gets resurrected, he passed out from trauma as a child, there was that time in volume 4 when he was soooo eepy and yawned in legato's face, and now this...

:( it's been said already, but knives has turned tesla into a symbol, much like vash with rem. if tesla had this power, what would she have done? we'll never know.

"i won't let you," he says. knives. honey. some self-reflection, please. whose fault was it that he ever used those powers at all. i'm begging you. LOOK INWARD.

^ more like millions guns lol. but actually i just wanted to point out he manifests 13 guns! thirteen, like the ghg! or it's just a coincidence.

knives insisting that this is a war... things to say when you're definitely not afraid of humans you swear. and then we get the dialogue from tristamp episode 12 from the scene that kills me the most.

at this point i said to myself (which isn't the first time i've had this thought reading trigun, and won't be the last), "why can't they just talk to each other like normal people?" LOL yeah so we're taking that pin out from way earlier in this post: "we can work through a few little differences if we just talk to each other." but if knives was capable of doing that, well the story wouldn't be happening at all, now would it? the concept of talking it out became impossible to him the moment he and vash discovered tesla.

also damn that post about knives seeing vash as an extension of himself wasn't kidding! i don't think i can add anything else to that, just. yep, it's literal!

aaaand anything else i have to say will have to be in my volume 7 post proper because i've hit the image limit LMAO. i just. wow. knives. what a character. what a villain. i'm rotating him in my mind like a rotisserie chicken.

[paleparearchive]

Thoughts Written in A Letter

Bazille's initial 4★ story (1/3) ( 1 - 2 - 3 )

Location: atelier 3 (morning) ; museum hallway (morning) ; Renoir, Monet, Sisley & Bazille's room | Characters: Bazille, Courbet, Rembrandt, Gauguin

Bazille: Alright, after this, I'm going to finish the painting…

Rembrandt: Aaah, it's Bazille-kun. Did you come here to paint toooo?~

Bazille: Ah, Rembrandt-san… Wait, what's wrong with your head!? It's covered in blood!

Rembrandt: Hahaha, I fell down and fell head first into a stone statueeee~ I broke the statue, I wonder if Michelangelo-kun will get mad at me again? I'll have to apologize to him later.

Bazille: What are you talking about so casually with your head bleeding!

Rembrandt: What am I talking about… It's normal for me to get injured, you knooow~

Bazille: Indeed it is, but... Anyways, you need to be patched up. I'll get a first aid kit right now…

Courbet: If you need a first aid kit, I have it here.

Geez, you're always getting injured. Put yourself in the shoes of those who have to patch you up all the time.

Rembrandt: Sorry as always, Courbet-kuun~

Courbet: This guy isn't sorry at all.

Bazille: Courbet, I'll help, too.

Courbet: No, could you go check on Gauguin instead, Bazille?

Bazille: Gauguin?

Courbet: His stomach hurt and he was feeling quite dizzy. I'm concerned about that guy as well, but this bloody one should be my priority.

Bazille: Yeah, surely that bloody one comes first. So, where's Gauguin?

Courbet: He was in the cross hallway.

Bazille: Got it, I'll be right there.

Rembrandt: Bye byeee~ Tell Gauguin-kun I said hi.

Courbet: Stay still, Rembrandt!

—

Gauguin: Uuugh… My stomach…

Bazille: Gauguin, are you alright!?

Gauguin: Bazille… Aaah, my stomach hurts…

Bazille: You almost collapsed. What's wrong?

Gauguin: Kuroda gave me some advice about painting. But he hit me right where it hurts... and then…

Bazille: Kuroda-san never says anything wrong, but he's a man who says things clearly. So that was an extreme amount of pressure, right?

Gauguin: R-Right…

Bazille: I'll take you to your room for the time being. Here, I'll lend you my shoulder. Can you stand up?

Gauguin: Sorry… Uugh…

Bazille: I'll walk slowly. If it gets too tough, let me know.

—

Bazille: Sigh… I finally settled down…

(I went to check on Rembrandt-san after that and saw that Courbet was treating him properly. Gauguin has been put to bed and will recover after a good night's rest. I was going to finish the painting, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it… Guess I got no choice, I'll just write a letter for a change of pace.)

…

(Rembrandt-san is covered in blood every day, and Gauguin is frequently sick. In Rembrandt-san's case, he has no choice but to be careful… But Gauguin has neurogenic gastritis. It's not something that's going to go away anytime soon, given the guy's nature.)

(Before I got here, I was told Courbet was taking care of both of them by himself. That guy complains as well, but... He's kind of a good caretaker. Nowadays, when Courbet can't keep up, he brings them to me. It's nice to have someone depend on you, but... When I'm treating them, I think of my mother and father.)

…

(How would Mom and Dad treat Gauguin and the others…? … They are both excellent doctors. I'm sure they would treat Gauguin properly in a different way than I did.)

(I… I chose to be an artist. I can't help but think about this stuff…)

But if I had become a doctor–

–Heck, I wonder if my parents would be fed up if I kept writing about these guilty feelings of mine.

[planetarybound]

Feeling better today. Long personal post about lots of stuff. 🙂

Finally felt like the dark cloud that's been over me since the transphobic therapist appointment is dissipating, still not feeling as good as I was before then though. Had a wonderful morning video chatting @mercuryrisinginvirgo for a couple of hours. We went to the gas station and I got some more energy drinks and taquitos, and I couldn't ask for a better beginning to the day.

Last night my mom got drunk and went rambling about how I used to line up my toy cars and planes into perfect straight lines, but when I said maybe I'm autistic, she adamantly denied that and said I'm perfectly normal. So I mentioned how I had extreme anxiety and used to chew my fingernails to the bone, and then chew my fingertips to the bone once the fingernails were gone, but she didn't interact with that at all. Then went on about how she pulled me out of the private Christian school I was in as soon as I wasn't happy with it, which is wrong.

(I wanted out in 4th grade, by 5th grade I was suicidal and kicking and screaming in the car begging not to go, but was forced to go anyway, after a month of faking a fever to stay home, and would come home in tears begging to get out of there.)

Got me wondering how different things would have been if I could've gotten screened for and gotten some help for autism or other things.

I didn't know anything about trans stuff, but when I was 20 I definitely checked a bunch of boxes for gender dysphoria as well. I might have been having an autistic meltdown right around my 21st birthday, but instead of anyone treating it as anything like that, I ended up in a jail cell and did 60 days in adseg, followed by probation and psychiatry for a condition where way fewer boxes were checked.

And none of them are, now. They should still be, if that's what it were, but they aren't. But just...

Living a no income no nothing life at home on antipsychotics, until I was 26 and got approved for SSI, but then things went to hell in my house once again and I became homeless, and ended up in a halfway house, followed by moving back with family before covid.

That last night got me thinking of how different it all could've been. Wish I had more, or better direction than what I got back then.

Following a doctor in Oklahoma that realized she was trans made me go digging through my older blog posts on this and other blogs I had, and it reminded me of a lot of things I had repressed and forgotten. I took a gender identity test around a month ago, and here were the results.

Not sure what it means, or how different it would be if I were more independent than being forced into a son role at all times with zero privacy.

Anyway. I can't wait to be out of the house all day everyday until I can get to a different living situation. There's got to be something better than this life I'm currently living.

Big thank you to @mercuryrisinginvirgo for being there for me throughout everything. Not sure I'd be here right now if it weren't for her, and a big thank you to all of you who are here expressing yourselves on tumblr. You've all helped me so much, and don't even know it.

[norcalbruja]

On the lines between "people" and "animals," with a tangent on the lines between "superheroes" and "people."

What's up folks, here's my EXTREMELY delayed post about animal-spirits, now that Tony Stark fixed my laptop!

--

Feb 23, 2024

What's up folks, both my eyes still work!

Turns out that minor surgery was VERY minor. It took me like an hour from checking in to scheduling my followup appointment for next month, and generally the only sign I've even gotten laser surgery is that my left eye is kind of red and sore.

The worst part of the laser surgery was how they had to beam a VERY BRIGHT LIGHT into my eye for 10-20 minutes, and it wigged me out so much that the doctor commented on my breathing.

-

Anyway, here is my long-delayed post about how Cernunnos sometimes looks like "a stag walking upright" instead of his more common "human with deer-horns" form.

It's weird when he drops by and visits.

UNCANNY VALLEY AHOY.

I've noticed a theme in my gnosis where sometimes animal-deities/spirits act/look "normal" because... you know, they're ANIMALS. But sometimes they're "part-human" or "trying to be human," and they can't really manage it.

And the ones "in-between" like Cernunnos can REALLY skew things.

I mentioned that the Bruin is a grizzly/brown-bear spirit who just sheds his bear-skin and walks around as a stark-naked human. If he remembers that people get weirded out about nudity, he just wraps his own pelt around his waist and calls it a day. His eyes tend to either stay a bear's (dark brown with no whites around them), or they're technically brown human eyes, but they have No Sapience/Understanding in them. I often see caves and dirt in the Bruin's eyes instead of my reflection.

-

A Fox-Spirit comes around sometimes, and they just look like a damn fox walking upright. Fox looks almost like a cartoon or children's book of "an animal walking and talking like a person," but in (spiritual) real life when you see a fox walking upright, they just look SO WEIRD AND UNNATURAL.

Fox just Does Not Act Right in addition to "not physically looking right," and they are firmly on the mad oracle/seer side of the "trickster" scale. They CAN shapeshift into a human form, but they just... DON'T. Partly because they aren't aware enough to do it; Fox doesn't always know what time it is, and they don't seem to know "how far along" I actually am on my spiritual wandering, because sometimes they're confused/upset that I'm still stuck at my mom's place.

Other spirits have mentioned that Fox sees A LOT OF SHIT (the past, the future, and reincarnations or "potential" lives) and that makes them really unpredictable, even though they often call me "little sister" and they seem to care about me as deeply as they can manage.

This one time Fox tried to "help" with my overwhelmed spirituality by shoving a stick in Spirit-Me's ear, which naturally freaked out the OTHER SPIRITS as they restrained the Fox and explained why rupturing someone's (spiritual) eardrum is NOT A GOOD IDEA.

One of my friends commented a while ago that Fox sounds terrifying.

Regarding their pronouns, Fox is gender-fluid and MOSTLY has a male form, but when they first arrived and I called them a "he," they just laughed and went "you think I'm a boy because I turn into one??? Lol nope."

--

Recent stuff, from early March:

This makes me wonder where exactly the Water-Spirit fits in on the "animal or human" scale, now that I know he turns into a giant squid / kraken. His eyes ARE sapient, at least when they look like EYES instead of the ocean abyss. Even if his eyes have squid/octopus pupils, they still have AWARENESS in a way that some animal-spirits don't. Was his ability to "go undercover" as Haik for years a manifestation of his cephalopod camouflage abilities?

He said a lot of times that he had to "learn how to be human," but I just wonder HOW MUCH this dude even needed to learn.

--

And speaking of that "animal to human" sliding scale, my next post will talk about Tony Stark again, and how very LIMINAL he and the other superheroes are.

One day he told me, "Look honey, we're not really 'people' anymore, but we also can't be gods. We are what people WANT TO BE, and that is a very finicky place in the spirit-world."

He just swings so wildly between "I DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS, BUT THIS IS A FUCKING SPIRIT. HE IS NOT A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION. HE IS TALKING ABOUT THE THINGS IN THE ETHERS" and "goddamn it, Tony, you are an alcoholic mess."

[rippeds0cks]

6/3/2023

Pics today sucked horrifically. Went to Costco with some buddies, it was nice. The whole time I'm in there I'm thinking of how me n my ex went to Costco once and called it "married life practice." Makes me feel really empty. I have to kill myself as soon as possible I can't keep this up anymore. Currently have drank a shit ton and I'm trying to type this before it fully sets in. Anyways that last pic Is the insane order of events that I had gone thru when waking up in the morning. The first half is normal cause I dream of things like that every night no matter how much I wish I didn't. The second half though was very odd, especially the part where I woke up irl and was actually physically affected by it. Normally The most I'll be physically affected is waking up with a high heart rate and that empty stomach feeling but this was like actually rough. I woke up and my chest physically hurt badly. Like from the skin to my internals it felt tight, so tight I couldn't breathe. Like almost like I was dry drowning or like when baby's bodies forget how to breathe and they almost suffocate due to not being able to breathe. I don't know. My body was also extremely cold. It took a while of sitting under the heater at full blast to even get warm again let alone a normal body temp. I'd like to completely rule out me having a minor heart attack due to the fact I've never dealt with something heart-related before but my heart has been under a lot of duress over the course of my life and stress can cause heart attacks. Normally I wouldn't even consider a heart attack to be something that would happen to me but the fact that my entire chest felt too tight to breathe PLUS my body was cold (possible lack of blood pumping) makes me wonder. After hanging out with my buddies I had a moment of doubt about killing myself cause I thought maybe why not tough it out even if every day is miserable, my body physically hurts, and my mental clarity is slipping. Then my brain started replaying everything and I remembered why the conditions that my body/mind put me through are completely unlivable. It's all good though I'm not sad about it at all. I talked to my mom recently n it'll suck to know she'll be sad for a little while but it'll all be fine in the end anyways. She has another son and overall better kids than me. Same with my dad. I was fighting off tears all day today. I actually almost burst out into tears in the gym but I put my head down and pretended like I was having a huge yawn when I came back up. That way it makes sense why my eyes were watery. Literally everything besides my body decaying could be fixed with just closure on the topic and a long detailed conversation with her but I refuse to ever even think of reaching out cause I pray she has forgotten my existence and is living a happy and fulfilling life right now. It's like they said in the blade runner 2049 movie, "sometimes loving someone means being a stranger." So I will die with these issues with me. No one will know or hear a word about it and I will quite literally drift off to sea with my problems and hopefully sink to the bottom of the ocean with them. Anyways I plan to draw the most heartbreaking gut-wrenching art tomorrow

[pigeonp0st]

Since I loved your one shot about Lena, I'm requesting another one! Reader is a single mom and is afraid to tell Lena about her child cause she thinks Lena isn't going to take it well, but in the end Lena loves her child.

Lena Luthor x Reader #2

Words: 1,590

Warnings: none?

Notes:

Thank you for requesting! If you’d like me to change the name of the kid (or the gender) feel free to say so. Also...sorry if you were expecting more of Lena. I realized at the end that there might not have been enough (Sorry for spelling mistakes too).

———

Miles, your eight year old son, has started to pretend he’s a psychologist. He’ll sit you down, with your head in his small lap (which isn’t very ethical), and ask you about your life problems.

Usually, you’ll make up funny nonsense that he’ll struggle to find the solution to...but today a very real problem has arrived, and you know you shouldn’t be trying to confide in your little boy about this, yet you decide to anyway.

He knows about you and Lena, though Lena doesn’t know about him. He saw her on TV once, was awestruck by her “smartness”, and you let slip that she’s the woman you’ve been dating.

Dating used as a loose term, because you and Lena haven’t actually become anything official. It’s...weird. Made even more so by the fact that she doesn’t know about the most important person in your life.

You tell Miles as much in today’s session. He beams down at you, happy that you’re finally starting to take his sessions seriously, and then taps his finger against his lip, thinking. “You should just tell her,��� he finally concludes after a long pause.

You narrow your eyes up at him suspiciously, and wonder if you should just pretend to take his advice and move on. You don’t. “People usually don’t want to get involved with single moms.”

His eyes furrow at that, clearly upset, so you rush on. “If someone doesn’t want to be involved with you, none of me longs to be involved with them,” then, you pause, “I just want to want to be involved with Lena.”

“So this stems from past trauma?” Miles asks, and you gape at him, shocked.

“Where the f—when did you learn any of those words, honey?”

He grins at you again, clearly proud of himself, and then schools his face into an attempt of looking professional. It’s humorous. “Psy- Psych—”

“Psychology.”

“Yes, that. It says that our fears usually come for childhood trauma.”

“I’m not scared,” but even as you say that you know it’s not true. You make a mental note to watch over whatever the hell Miles is listening to, to make sure it’s age appropriate. “Even if I am, it’s definitely not from childhood trauma.”

“From relationship trauma then?”

You let out a shocked laugh, completely stumped. “Baby, your eight. If you keep saying smart things you’re going to start scaring me.”

“Let's talk about your fears,” He suggests. Clearly wanting to move on he gestures for you to sit up. Once you do, he hops up from the couch, grabs his clipboard from the coffee table, and starts scribbling down things you aren’t able to see.

“Okay,” you hesitantly agree. “I’m scared Lena will want nothing to do with me.”

“Why is that something you're scared of?”

You give him a confused look that he pays no attention to. “Obviously I like her...I also fear that you won’t.”

He nods, finally looking up from his clipboard. “And what happens if I hate her, and she hates me, so she leaves and you never speak to her again?”

You choke on absolutely nothing.

“What will you do then?” Miles asks, and you have no response for him. He doesn’t seem to want one. “You’ll deal with it, like you always have. So stop worrying until it comes. If it comes.”

You’re equal parts extremely proud of him, and extremely concerned as you think over what he’s said.

Then, as if he’s tired of being the smartest eight year old alive, he hands you the paper he was working on for half of your ‘session’. The paper is full of sharp lines that get more curvy and tangled the closer they get to what appears to be the middle.

“This,” he says, “is how you’re feeling.”

And you believe him.

———

It takes you a week to build up the courage to tell Lena about Miles. He surprisingly helped you come to the realization that holding off on telling Lena the truth won’t change the outcome.

In fact...it would probably make things more complicated. Even now, she deserved to know sooner than this.

It’s too late, of course. There’s no point in wishing you had done differently.

“Are you okay?” Lena asks through the phone, sounding so beautifully concerned over the fact that you haven’t spoken for awhile. God, you're whipped for this world-saving genius.

“Yeah,” you say, “just...you know how I said I had something to talk to you about?” You don’t wait for her to confirm, because of course she remembers, she’s looked scared because of it all day. “I sort of have to show you...so would you mind coming over?”

Yes, you’re a coward that’s hoping Lena seeing Miles for herself, instead of you telling her about him, will make her more accepting. Miles has a very convincing charm.

“You want me to go to your place?” Lena sputters, clearly shocked.

In an instant you regret the decision you were so sure about before. Maybe Lena isn’t ready. You should tell her before she comes, so she isn’t shocked out of her mind when she sees him.

You should—

“Okay,” Lena says, determined. You hadn’t even responded to her before. “I’ll be there soon.” And then she hangs up the phone before you manage to say anything, leaving you wondering what the fuck you’re doing.

You could call her back.

...you’re not going to. You’re too scared.

——

Miles waits by the door, dressed in his best suit. He knows how anxious you are about this, despite how hard you’ve been trying to hide it since your weird ‘session’, so he says he’s going to try and be the best him he can be.

You tell him that all he needs to be is his normal self and everything will be alright, but he admits to being nervous to meet Lena too, because she’s super smart. (He’s been watching anything he can find of her on the internet)

Thus, the two of you wait together impatiently, trying not to descend into madness.

��—

At some point Miles starts making and handing you scribbles of how you feel, and you start making and handing them back.

It’s while you’re handing Miles your next piece that the doorbell rings.

He doesn’t look to be that nervous anymore, just excited, so he follows you on your track to answer the door, and with each step you contemplate your entire existence beyond Miles.

Then…Then you open the door.

Miles is hiding behind your leg, looking up at Lena with hesitant hopefulness and uncertainty, it’s the exact match of the way you’re looking at her, and Lena is looking at him with wide eyes.

Because you’re sure you’re about to die from the silence, you croak out a wobbly and quiet; “hi,” at the same time Mile’s sticks out his hands and says his own charming greeting.

“Hello, doctor Y/L/N here. Nice to meet you.”

“Lena Luthor.” As if on autopilot Lena shakes his hand. “You’re a doctor?” She asks, smiling the smallest of smiles at him.

He nods his head eagerly, glad she’s smiling. “Yeah! Of—of psy- psych...”

“Psychology,” You finish. Lena’s gaze switches to you. It’s the moment you think you’re gonna die, but her gaze is concerned instead of disappointed.

“He’s older than the photo on your wallpaper suggested,” Lena says.

Oh.

Oh…

You’re an idiot.

Then, Lena smiles—wider this time because of your dumbstruck expression—and looks at Miles. “To be a doctor you have to be pretty smart.”

He nods, his eyes practically full of stars.

“That’s how I know you and I are going to get along great.”

Miles grins madly, pushes you a bit to the side so Lena can come in, and says, eager, “can I show you my work, please?”

And Lena looks from you, to him, laughs a laugh full of amusement and endearment, and agrees gracefully. “I’d love it if you would.”

———

Lena adores Miles.

Around him she almost seems, impossibly, like a child herself. She so obviously and beautifully wants him to like her, and all the while Miles is almost exactly the same around her.

They’re both complete dorks trying to subtly get each other's attention and all you want to do is watch the two of them interact for ages.

They both were two separate parts of your life, and now they’re merged better than you ever expected them to.

It’s great. Absolutely great. But whenever they turn their twin gazes on you you’re sure you’re going to melt into a puddle of adoration.

Wow.

“What is it?” You ask them, after they’ve both looked at you for too long without saying anything.

Lena tilts her head, her smile concerned again, “you look like you’re about to cry.”

Miles nods his agreement. “What’s wrong mom? Does whatever bothering you stem from childhood trauma?” He asks, and at Lena’s ‘the fuck’ face you burst out into a fit of laughter, that quickly turns into tears of absolute love.

Both Miles and Lena looked at you with alarm because they don’t realize this is the happiest you’ve been in a while. It is though. It is.

“Not childhood trauma,” you assure them both, and before Miles can suggest it you add; “not past relationship trauma either, it’s happy tears.”

“Oh,” Lena stutters, “good.”

“Oh,” Miles repeats, sounding relieved and a tad bit disappointed. “I haven’t learned how to deal with those tears yet.”

[supraveng]

Marvelous Friends part 1

Summary:  You join your best friend at a party, and meet the man of your dreams?

Characters: Reader, Benedict Cumberbatch x Sophie Hunter, RDJ x Susan Downey, Sebastian Stan, Chris Evans

Warnings: cursing, reader in over her head, bad writing...

“Oh, for fuck’s sake Aaron, you are supposed to be preventing these things, not causing them“ you scream into your cell phone so agitated by this whole thing that you aren’t even aware that there are people watching you from the window.

You stepped outside trying to not cause a scene or god forbid have Sophie’s kids hear you and repeat anything you might say.  You finally hang up and throw your phone across the lawn as Benedict comes out the door to check on you. 

“Everything ok dear?” he approaches you with a smirk knowing full well that you are irritated beyond rational conversation.  “Can I get you anything?” he asks.  Turning to face him now that you’ve taken a few deep breaths, 

“I think I need a new manager, got any good ones lying around?” you reply.  

“Holy Shit!  That was your manager!  I just thought your husband  was in the doghouse!  Hi, I’m Robert” he sticks out his hand and you shake it, thankfully you are still too riled up to get star struck and make a fool of yourself.  

“Hi, sorry, I didn’t intend to be that loud, but that man is an absolute jackass!  I’m Y/N” you respond as you blow out some air and try to calm down.   

“Y/N darling, you need a drink, let me make you a martini” 

“No, Benny, I’m your babysitter tonight and you know one martini turns into 5” you smirk as you follow  the two of them back into the house.  

Sophie is coming down the stairs and her smile disappears when she sees your red face and Benedict heading toward the kitchen. “Y/N, what happened?  Are you ok?” she asks, her voice thick with worry.  

“Oh Phie, I’m fine, Aaron is just trying my patience and I couldn’t stay quiet” you smile as she wraps you in a hug, then busts out laughing.  

“Well, that’s a long time coming, I’m not sure how you have worked with him this long without bloodshed” she quips as Benedict hands you a cup of tea.  

“I’m not that bad to work with, I just don’t like my personal life to be used without my permission. Ugh, I just don’t have the energy for him today, I wanted to come and have fun with Kit, Hal & Finn” you whine as you sip your tea “but apparently the drama pays off because this is the best cup of tea Benny has ever made for me, thank you” you reach up and peck his cheek “I’m feeling better already.” 

“Good, because the boys have a list of fun for you tonight and they are extremely excited.” Sophie responds “Oh, and this is Susan, Robert’s wife”  

“It’s nice to meet you, now you all go on and have a lovely dinner and don’t worry about us” you smile to the couples as you head upstairs to check on the kids. 

Three hours later the two couples walk back into the house to find you frantically typing on your laptop at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, with a cold cup of tea next to you.  You jump when you hear someone clear their throat, not realizing they had come in and were all staring at you.  

“What? Why are you all staring at me?” you ask.  

Sophie shakes her head and giggles at you “we asked if you wanted to join us for a drink, apparently you are very focused on your work and didn’t even hear us come in.”   

“Sorry, I was planning my wedding” you reply with a smirk “Kit proposed again, actually, I’m not sure this was a proposal, it was more or less a list of reasons why my previous decline is not being accepted.  Apparently, age is just a number and I can move to England right away, so the wedding is next week” you explain as you follow the others over to the bar.   

Benedict turned around with a guilty look on his face, “what did you do?” his wife asks with a pointed glare.   “I was reassuring our son that if he liked someone and made his intentions known then any girl would be lucky to have him, but in my defense, I thought he was talking about that little girl down the street, Madison.   They were playing yesterday and he seemed smitten, so when he mentioned his love living in the US and not in England…..I was trying to help” he huffed out as he started pouring the drinks.   

You all start laughing and realize that since it’s Benedict’s fault, he will have to break it to Kit that you will not be marrying him next week.  “Why do I have to be the bad guy here?  It was an accident!” Ben protests “and why didn’t you just tell him you have a boyfriend already and can’t marry him?”  

“Because I would never lie to Kit” you respond, sipping your martini.   “I haven't really met anyone since I moved back from Vancouver, a few dates here or there but no one to write home about" you say with a shrug  “Well, in that case, can I give you away at the wedding?”  Robert asks and thankfully lightens the mood.  It was another two hours of drinking and laughing with your oldest and newest friends before you all decide to call it a night.   

“Y/N, Robert and I are having friends over to our place on Sunday, we would love for you to be there” Susan states as they are heading toward the door.  “That’s so sweet, thank you, I’ll just tag along as an extra Cumberbatch” you tell her as you hug her goodbye. 

You wake the next morning and know that you have a ton of work to do and 0 motivation.   Deciding to distract yourself as best you can, you text Sophie about the party at Susan & Robert’s.

So what kind of party is this thing tomorrow?

Phie: They usually have 30 or so people, tons of food, drinks, but very laid back.  I think you will like it 

That’s reassuring, the last thing I need is to make a fool out of myself in front of Ben’s celebrity friends

Phie: Oh, there will definitely be celebs there, but honestly I have no idea who, most likely a bunch of the Marvel crew, those who are in town anyway….but don’t stress, they are all  mostly normal people, lol

Well, I’m going to work on some writing and then maybe try to find something nice to wear to the party, I might make a fool of myself, but I need to look like I have my act together

Phie: Send me pics, I’ll help you decide….btw Ben has been questioning me on your dating habits, I have a funny feeling that he might try to set you up...

Well, that sounds dreadful,  I love your husband but what is his track record for match making?

Phie: I don't think he's actually ever tried to set anyone up before

Fantastic, I'm the guinea pig 🙄

 Ok, what do you think of these, I don’t want to be overdressed or look like I’m homeless

Phie: I love them both, but how about you were the short one & I borrow the blue one?  

That is a great idea!  I’ll be there a bit early so we can get ready together.  Who is staying home with the boys?

Phie: Actually, day time parties with the Downey’s usually includes the kids, so they will be joining us

Time for the party came earlier than you had anticipated as you pulled up to Phie’s house, Kit came running out the door with a big smile on his face.  Crouching down you scooped him into a hug and kissed his cheek.  

“Well aren’t you in a good mood today, handsome?” asking as you set him back down.  He grabbed your hand and began dragging you back to the house. 

 “Mum told me we can’t get married next week, but I can still love you for the rest of my life, isn’t that great!” he exclaimed as you walked in the front door.  

“That is the best thing I’ve heard all week!  And I get to love you for the rest of my life too” you reply watching the realization hit him and his smile get even bigger and run off to tell everyone the good news.  Before you could do anything, you went back out to your car and grabbed your bags and then headed up to Phie’s bedroom to get ready.  

“There you are, I was beginning to worry” she said as she pecked your cheek and gave you a hug, then handed you a glass.  

“Did you start day drinking without me?” you inquire as you sip on the merlot with a smile on your face.  

“I just opened the bottle for us to enjoy while we get ready.  I spoke with Kit and the wedding is off but he understands and all is well.  Benedict tried and, just made everything messier” she responded while pulling the blue dress from the garment bag.  

“You did a fantastic job, he gave me the biggest hug and seems very happy that we will not be getting married” you giggle as you move around her room figuring out the best place to put your things.  

“I think he’ll be more upset about you taking off next week than anything, that’s why I’m not planning on telling him until after you’ve gone.  He has grown really attached to you” she smirks as she’s slipping the dress on.  

Before you realize it, the wine bottle is empty and Ben is knocking on the door.

“You two look amazing as always, but the car is here, so we need to head out.  Can you bring Kit down with you while I go down and get Hal & Finn seated in the car?” he asks as Kit comes in and gasps looking up at his mom.   

“Mum, you look like a princess” he hugs her legs and looks up at her lovingly. 

 “Thank you love, you look very handsome.  Are you ready to go? Do you have your bag?” she asks while rubbing his back.  

“Oh, I need to get that, and can I give Y/N her present now?”  You look over a bit confused 

“oh Kit, you didn’t have to get me a gift” you tell him as he gives you a hug.   

“But it’s important to show the people you love how special they are, I’ll be right back” he states as he heads back downstairs.  You look at Sophie confused and she just smirks at you as both follow him down to the kitchen.   He holds up a cupcake with a huge grin on his face.  

“This is for you, because you are as sweet as a cupcake.  And that’s a ring you can wear to remind you that you are wonderful when I’m not here to tell you.” 

 You feel like you are about to cry, it was by far the most sincere and thoughtful thing you have ever heard.  “Thank you!  I love it & I love you!” you told him as you kissed his forehead and put the ring on.  

“Alright, let’s get going Kit, dad and your brothers are in the car waiting for us!” Sophie grabbed his hand and laced your arm with hers as she ushered you all out the door. 

Stepping out of the car at the Downey’s house you started walking towards the door when Kit came up and grabbed your hand.  

“Can I be your date tonight?” he asked with a shy grin.  

“Absolutely!  There’s no one else I would want to accompany me tonight.”  

Ben turns to you, holding Hal & Finn “remember Kit, the kids are going to be playing upstairs, but you can join us when you get hungry, alright?”  

“Yes, dad, but Y/N is still my girl” he stated proudly as you walked through the door.  

“That’s right Ben, I’m Kit’s girl!” you lean down and kiss the top of his head just before he heads up the stairs with his dad.  Sophie grabbed your arm and the two of you headed further into the house.  

Robert spotted you almost immediately and came over hugging you both “where is the fiance? Are all the details in place for the ceremony?  I’m still walking you down the aisle right?”  

“Hi Robert, I’m sorry but the ceremony has been cancelled.   Sophie was able to talk some sense into Kit since Benny was useless” you reply.  

“I heard that!” Ben remarks as he’s coming into the room.   “And in my defense, I’m not useless, just not very good at telling my son no.”  

“It’s alright dahling, you tried your best.” Sophie tried to console Benedict who seemed to take your statement to heart.  

“Well, I’m glad you made it, can I get you a drink?” Susan asked as an attempt to move on to a more neutral conversation.   

“Yes, please” you replied happily as you followed her to the bar.  

“Y/N? Y/N L/N?  Holy Shit!”  You heard from the doorway to the next room, where most of the party goers had already gathered.  You turned and was shocked 

“Seb?  Holy Shit!  How are you?” you asked as you moved over to hug him.  “It’s been so long, I’m surprised you recognized me.”  

“I’m good” he responded “and yea, it’s been like...10 years? And you look great, haven’t aged a bit!”  

You laughed at his response “that is an absolute lie, but I will take the compliment anyway.” you giggle at him.  He was always such a nice guy to work with and genuinely considerate to everyone on set.  His charming personality always made you smile. 

“This is so great running into you, I saw your interview on Good Day LA last week.  You are doing so great!” he said with a huge smile.  

“Oh thanks, but I think that may have been the worst interview in the history of television.   I was honestly hoping no one saw it” you cringed rethinking how quickly the questions had gone off the rails.  You are a writer, becoming more well known over the past decade so interviews were becoming more common for you, but that one felt more like a Twilight Zone episode.  

“Well, it was a bit crazy, but you handled a lot better than most people would.  I was impressed” he grinned as he took a sip of his beer.  

“Thanks, I appreciate that, and my whole deer in headlights reaction.” you commented as you took the drink Susan offered.  

“Hey, I didn’t know you knew each other?” you heard Robert say as he came up from behind you “and what happened in the interview?”  

“Yea, I was writing for Gossip Girl, back when Seb was on and he was constantly teasing me for being cold” you reminded him with a smirk.  

“New York in fall is beautiful, not cold! You are crazy!” he responds as he starts laughing at me.  

“And the interview was a shit show that I barely made it out alive” you state with a roll of your eyes.  

“That’s not true, you put that woman in her place and didn’t seem fazed by her ridiculous questions at all” he told me.  

“What the hell happened?” Robert seemed more interested than I thought he would 

“we were talking about my new book and the book tour coming up, then all of a sudden she’s asking me about my ex” I responded as I shrugged my shoulders.  Sebastian looked at me “then, the woman asks if she’s seeing anyone now, and your response was priceless, I might steal it if you don’t mind”  he states as he’s laughing remembering the interview.  

“Y/N, dear, what did you say?” Robert asks with a smirk.  

“I asked her ‘why? Are you shooting your shot?” as you start laughing too, realizing that you probably couldn’t have planned it if you tried.  At this point you realize there are more of the Marvel friends standing around listening to your conversation and you don’t even care.   

Your first drink is kicking in and it’s not like you are ever going to see these people again. “Honestly, I don’t know why she even mentioned my ex, nobody cares who I’m dating, I’m a writer”  

“Yes, but when us writers date high profile celebrities, people want to know” Sophie reminds you as she puts her arm around you.  

“Oh Phie, high profile is a bit of a stretch doncha think? But you are always my voice of reason, this is why I love you!” you say as you kiss her cheek.  Looking around the room you wonder if there’s anyone else here you know, when you see Chris Evans on the other side of the room.  

Benedict immediately follows your line of sight and smirks before taking your empty glass.  “I think you need a refill, here allow me, why don't you and Sophie go find a place to chat.”  

His wife shakes her head and gives you a small sympathetic smile before sending him back for refills.  Sophie drags you further into the room and finds a spot to sit that gives you a better view of Mr. Evans.  

“I didn’t realize you knew Sebastian” she said as she sat.  

“Yea, we worked together when I was living in NY, that was 10 or 12 years ago.  I didn’t know you knew him” you respond.  She looks at you questioningly, then shakes her head.  

“All the Marvel people know each other, you still haven’t watched the movies, have you?”  

“Um, I haven’t seen all of them, there are a lot, but I did watch Doctor Weirdo, and Benny was very good!” you respond quite proud of yourself.  

“Bloody hell!  It’s Doctor Strange, we’ve had this discussion before” Ben states as he hands you your fresh drink.  

“Ok, I’m sorry.  Doctor Strange, although I don’t think that’s much better than Doctor Weirdo.  And in my defense, your facial hair in the movie gave me nightmares'' you say as you sip on your drink. 

“Anyway, did the ex contact you after the interview?  I’m just curious?” Ben asks, rolling his eyes at you.  

You scrunch up your nose at the question “no, why would he? I haven’t spoken to him in the last four years. And honestly I'm sure he deleted my number.  Can we talk about anyone else?"  

"Yes, what's the schedule on the book tour? How long will you be gone?" Sophie acts trying to defuse the irritation in your voice with the mention of your ex.  

You can tell by the way she's glancing at her husband that she's trying to figure out why he brought up your ex knowing full well that if he had contacted you, she would have been the first one to know about it.. 

"Oh I'm flying out next Sunday, heading for NYC, then I'll be in Boston for 2 days, then a day In Philly, a day in Baltimore and I'm not 100% of the cities after that, other than ending up the following week in Miami so I can be with the family for spring break" you mention to them. 

"Did I hear you say you are only going to Boston for 2 days, that's not nearly long enough" you hear a deep voice state as you look up and see Chris Evan's standing next to Seb and walking closer to you.  

Holding out his hand "I'm Chris, I don't think we've met" he states.  

You plaster the most sincere smile you can on your face in hopes of not drooling at the sight of him, shaking his hand "I'm Y/N, and yes, this tour is only 2 days in Boston, but I lived there for 5 years so I’ve seen quite a bit already” you respond.

“Huh?  For someone who’s cold all the time, you seem to wind up in colder climates” Seb laughs at you.  “Shut up! You are the worst!” you respond with a laugh.  

“It’s true though, darling.  And you always call me to complain about it!” Sophie responds with a smirk.  

“OK, in my defense, Boston was a needed escape from my family, whom I love dearly but can be quite suffocating at times.  Then Chicago was my first real job after graduation and I couldn’t pass that up!  And as my best friend, Phie, you are required to listen to all my complaining, regardless of the topic” you state matter of factly.  

“And last year in Vancouver, that was the worst yet, she would send me photos of eyelashes with ice crystals on them” Sophie laughs remembering your first winter in Canada and how miserable you were.  

“That was awful and you and Benny both ridiculed me, I’m still emotionally scared”  

“So, you don’t like the cold but keep torturing yourself?” Chris asks with a smirk.  

“It appears I do, but it’s always for good reason. Chicago was an opportunity I couldn’t resist, if I had taken that job, I probably wouldn't have published my first novel” you explain with fondness.  

“That’s not true, Y/N.  Your first novel was incredible and it would have been published eventually”  Ben states as he takes your empty glass.  

“Benedict has read my book?” you asked Sophie completely shocked.  

“He has read all of your novels, but I think the first 3 was trying to find juicy gossip on how we met or something to try and blackmail you later, I’m not quite sure” she responds with a shrug.   

“Hold on” Seb interjects “your book, Searching for more, is about Sophie?” 

“Yes, and no” you respond “the adventure that Annabell has is loosely based on my summer after high school before moving to Boston.  And her new found friend, Fiona, is Sophie to a T!  And I’m also shocked that you’ve read it” you eyed him suspiciously.  

“Ok, so you really married a French man when you were 18 and brought him back with you?”  Seb asks, completely disregarding that you questioned him about reading the book.  How did your day turn out like this?  This was the most surreal moment you have had in a long time.  

“No, he wasn’t French, he was Belgian!” Benedict responds as he comes back in with refills.  You start laughing when you see the way Chris and Seb are staring at you wide eyed.   

“Oh my gosh!  No, I didn’t get married when I was 18.  And Benny, you weren't there, you don’t know anything” shaking your head.  “Annabelle’s story is loosely based on events that occurred, we didn’t get married…..and he was Swiss, I think.” you snicker when you look over at Sophie for confirmation, she shrugs and takes a drink.    

The five of you continue to chat for another hour or so when you feel a tap on your shoulder.  You turn to see Kit smiling at you with a cup in his hand “I missed you” he states as he climbs up into your lap and hugs you around your neck.  

“I missed you too little man, do anything fun while you were upstairs?” you asked as he made himself more comfortable.  

“I didn’t know you had a kid” Seb says as you are trying to balance the 5 year old in your lap with your drink in your hand.  

Kit looks up at him “she’s not my mum, she’s my girl!  That’s my mum” he states as he points to Sophie.  

“Oh, well, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Seb, this is my friend Chris.  What’s your name?”  he asks while Kit plops himself in the middle of the group as though he should have been there all along.  

“I’m Kit” he states as he extends his hand to both Chris and Sebastian.  

“So, she’s your girl, huh?” Chris asks with a smirk “is it serious?”  

“Very!  He gave me a ring today, see.” showing Chris your right hand and the Wonder Woman ring. 

“Wait a minute, the wedding is cancelled, but you still gave her a ring? I’m not sure that’s how it works buddy”  Robert kneels down talking to Kit.  

“it’s ok, I get to love her forever and we can get married when I’m 30!” Kit explains as he rushes off to join the other kids.  

You all turn and look at Sophie “I thought you fixed it Phie!  You’ve just given him a deadline!" you gasp. 

She smiles at you with a guilty look on her face "I think you might need to grab a bite to eat before you have another drink. And honestly, I'm sure he will forget all about this in a few months. Besides, I won't let my 30 year old son marry some 60 something year old hag that's after him for his money!" she states as seriously as possible. 

You deadpan "thanks for that. I need a new best friend" you roll your eyes and head towards the food. 

"Well, I didn't see that coming" Robert chuckles as he watches the two of you walk out of the room. 

"That actually went better than I expected" Ben responds and shakes his head, "those two are worse than siblings." 

A/N: I had an idea of who the ex is, but I may just leave it open for interpretation, he does come into the story later, but can remain faceless

[one-piecee]

#ONEPIECE1036

in my defence I thought we wouldn't get a chapter til like 2nd January (or so I heard??) and was super confused when we got one this sunday, but anyways!! new chapter means new post of me screaming a little

The chapter title is: "Bushido is the way of Death"

King got his wings cut (or just the right wing, and zoro is the right wing of the future pirate king luffy which should mean something but i'm not smart enough to know what so we'll leave it at that) and Zoro has now officially defeated King, victor: Zoro!

Also!! Just last chapter we talked about how Kaido definitely thought he himself was Joy Boy because of the whole "I'll change the world" speech he gave King and immediately after, aka this chapter, we get it confirmed that Kaido did indeed think he could be joy boy--

((or perhaps that King thought Kaido was Joy boy, and not Kaido himself since Kaido says "you still believe that?"))

Anywho, I also liked King's flashback here, because as we all know I'm obsessed with right hand men being extremely loyal to their captains and this kind of makes me like King as a character more:

Of course, unfortunately for King he did lose (to the right hand man of the real future pirate king, too bad Kaido)

And after King reminiscing, we get Zoro's flashback to him promising Luffy to never lose again (just like King to Kaido, nice) and saying that if "this is what it takes then..."

The CP0 get information about King's defeat signaling the defeat of the all-stars and the Tobiroppi, which tips the scales to us winning, but as long as "those two" are still fighting, those wins are meaningless-- which obviously means we'll be getting the fights with big mom and kaido soon enough.

Aside from Kaido (being dealt with by Luffy) and Big Mom (Kidd and Law) there's the two threats of Onigashima falling and Kanjuro's flame attack. Yamamoto is currently rushing towards the flame, and Momonosuke still has to figure out a way to stop Onigashima from falling down on the flower capital.

Also on more news, I think it's pretty much official now that both Kin'emon and Kiku will survive this war because of the (amazing, magnificent, top-tier, wonderful) speech by Usopp:

"I don't get this obsession with honor and comitting Seppuku, I know it's your culture but I can't stand it!

This also just solidifies Usopp as one of the bravest characters in one piece.

And then we have best boy Izo coming to the rescue looking as amazing as ever and also spewing off a wonderful line--

Luffy stays giving people reasons to live.

CP0 are still a threat, because Apoo is running away, and Drake has been taken down

and so I will continute the "Brook and Robin fight the CP0 and beat them up" Agenda. I need to see that fight-

Also!!!!! I don't know what this means and Oda needs to stop playing with us but!! Sanji's eyebrow!! Is back to normal!!!

first picture if chapter 1031, and second picture this chapter

His left eyebrow is back to looking like it did before his body went through the changes and I don't know what this means all I know is I hope things are ok now and I don't have to keep worrying for this man

moving on

we finally finally finally finally got some panels of luffy and kaido's fight

and let's just remember that while kaido is in his hybrid form, luffy is currently in his base form- and he's keeping up with kaido hit after hit. remember that

and you know how i said luffy keeps giving people reasons to live? my man is even giving kaido a reason to live, no more attempts to off himself he's getting excited cus he finally found an opponent worth fighting

big ass smile on his face and all that, that's the luffy effect

doesn't seem to be a break next week and if all goes well it should be big mom vs kid and law or luffy vs kaido (or another scattered one like this? or maybe the conclusion to raizo because they're going at it? or more cp0? or? or or? so many options i don't know why you'd try and predict BUT!! APPARENTLY THERE'S GOING TO BE SOME "CRAZY REVEAL" NEXT CHAPTER???)

[westiec]

June 17: Chengxian 💜🖤💕

childhood friends to lovers/QPPs, ace Jiang Cheng, bi & aro Wei Wuxian, modern AU

(A/N: If you're wondering about a certain other someone, he will have a wonderful, full life of his own in Suzhou in this AU but is not in this story. 💙 There are some brief mentions of offscreen ace-antagonism, not by anyone we know.)

Read on ao3

Jiang Cheng had been Wei Ying's best friend in the whole world for his entire life.

Okay. Well, not quite his entire life, but certainly since Wei Ying’s parents moved to California when he was little little, which was about as far back as Wei Ying could remember anyway. Wei Ying’s baba and Jiang Cheng’s baba had grown up in Wuhan together and been best friends when they were kids, so naturally, when Wei Ying’s family moved into the same neighborhood as the Jiangs, it made perfect sense for Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng to become best friends too.

It was Jiang Cheng who had taught Wei Ying that he didn't have to be afraid of dogs, by introducing him to Princess, Jasmine, and Lil' Love. Lil' Love lived up to her name, coming and quietly sitting in all her fluffy glory on Wei Ying’s lap every time he went over to play.

It was also Jiang Cheng who Wei Ying got drunk with for the first time. They snuck booze from the cabinet where Wei Ying’s parents kept it and laughed at the faces each other made with every shot until they stopped tasting the harsh burn, and then laughing more just because.

(Wei Ying’s mom had not laughed, not at the time, when the two teens had been sick as anything the next morning, but instead made them a gloriously greasy late breakfast and gave them lots of advice about proper hydration.

Then she told Jiang Cheng’s mom and let her scold them.)

It was Jiang Cheng who came out first, their first semester in college, when he told Wei Ying he didn't think he wanted to have sex with anyone, ever, and asked if Wei Ying thought that meant no one would ever want to date him. Wei Ying hugged him tight and told him he didn't know about everyone out there, but he knew Jiang Cheng was the best guy in the world and would be an awesome boyfriend, and he'd fight anyone who said differently.

Jiang Cheng found a group on campus for third culture LBGT kids, and Wei Ying went with him, as a supportive ally.

Which was how Wei Ying figured out that he was not just a supportive ally.

In listening to the others talk about orientation and identity and attraction and cultural expectations, Wei Ying realized that what he'd always assumed was normal—finding all kinds of people physically attractive, regardless of their gender—was actually his bisexuality. So that was kind of cool.

"So yeah, now we can be queer together!" Wei Ying said, when he excitedly shared his newfound realization with Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng snorted. "Yeah, 'all' and 'nothing,'" he joked.

It was Jiang Cheng who'd helped him practice what to say to his parents when he wanted to change his major at the end of sophomore year, and Jiang Cheng who reminded him to eat and sleep and "take a fucking break, Wei Ying," those next couple semesters when he took way too many hours so he wouldn't have to rack up a whole extra year's worth of student loans to finish his new degree plan.

It was Jiang Cheng who graduated first, on a gorgeous blue-skyed sunny day in May, and Jiang Cheng who suggested Wei Ying keep living with him at his new apartment, so he wouldn't have to try to find a one-semester lease until he finished in December.

(They renewed the lease together every time.)

Jiang Cheng ribbed him playfully each time Wei Ying met someone new, but he was always there each times things fizzled out after a few months for reasons that never quite made sense to Wei Ying.

Jiang Cheng occasionally dated too, and Wei Ying was glad he never did have to fight anybody—though he did drive Jiang Cheng to the emergency room the time he came home with split knuckles from punching a guy who, "seemed to think I didn't know my own mind about certain things."

But dating sucked for everybody, right? It wasn't like Wei Ying or Jiang Cheng were in any hurry to settle down and do the whole spouse and kids thing or whatever. Wei Ying tried to imagine it and just... couldn't, though the image of Jiang Cheng with a baby was admittedly pretty cute.

~

It was not Jiang Cheng, but Jiang Yanli, a few months after she proposed to her girlfriend and they started planning their wedding, who Wei Ying finally asked, "Yanli-jie, how does a person decide someone else is their person?"

Jiang Yanli looked across the room to where Jiang Cheng was showing her soon-to-be-wife how to put side spin on a billiards ball and smiled. "I think you just know," she said. "You meet someone and you get to know them, spend time together, then one day you realize you love them and want to build the rest of your life with them."

Wei Ying wrinkled his nose. "I dunno if it works that way for me. Just some random person? I've never met anyone I can imagine wanting to live with all the time. Well, besides—huh..." he cut off suddenly and darted a look over at Jiang Yanli, who just calmly sipped her drink.

"Have you ever told him that?" she asked, after a moment where Wei Ying reassessed his entire life and dating history. "I think he might appreciate hearing it."

"I... huh. Yanli-jie, you're kinda blowing my mind here," he complained.

"I gathered," she said wryly, before fixing him with a smile that made all the hair on the back of his neck stand up. "Of course, I trust," she told him, "that I do not need to explain to you of all people how very dearly I hold my didi's happiness and well-being."

He swallowed and raised three fingers in the salute he'd used ever since the summer that—hah—he and Jiang Cheng had decided as kids that they would make their own oath of brotherhood like the heroes of their favorite show. "I, Wei Ying, swear to you that I would kick my own ass before I did anything to hurt him."

Jiang Yanli leaned over to knock her shoulder against his and nodded. "That's what I thought."

~

Turned out, dating Jiang Cheng didn't suck at all.

It felt easy in a way Wei Ying’s past dates never had, less like trying to keep up with a game whose rules everybody knew except him, more like... well, like spending time with his best friend in the whole world, but on purpose. There was also a tension in the back of Wei Ying’s mind that seemed to have lifted, though he couldn't quite pinpoint what it was that had gone.

It was Jiang Cheng who helped him figure it out.

"I think it's that now I'm able to count on this. On us," he said, when Wei Ying brought it up. "Before, whenever you went out with someone new, I wondered if this would be the time you'd find someone to fall in love with and leave me behind."

"Aww, Chengcheng! I would never!"

Jiang Cheng huffed and rolled his eyes, but his cheeks were pink. "Well, I know that now," he said, a pleased little smile breaking through his attempts at a scowl.

"As long as you're sure—" Wei Ying began, still getting used to thinking about himself with the word "aromantic." Still a so very sure that Jiang Cheng deserved to be fallen in love with.

"Hey!" Jiang Cheng cut him off. "None of that. I know you. And I know you don't see it this way, but I personally think it's pretty damn romantic that you choose to love me, on purpose."

"I simply have exquisite taste in life partners," Wei Ying sniffed, embarassed the way he always got when Jiang Cheng declared something he'd done "romantic."

"You do," Jiang Cheng agreed. "Someone told me a long time ago I was the best guy in the world and would make an awesome boyfriend, and that he would fight anyone who said differently."

Wei Ying laughed. "That's you and your sister I've promised to kick my own ass if I ever break your heart, then. Guess I'll just have to keep you forever."

"Damn right, you will," Jiang Cheng agreed, grinning smug and happy and breathtakingly beautiful. Wei Ying leaned across the couch to give him a sweet, closed-mouth kiss—the kind Jiang Cheng had shyly admitted he actually did like, a lot—and smiled too, at how lucky he'd gotten to be with his best friend in the whole world for his entire life.

🖤💜

Today's (extremely long!) thread was inspired by this WONDERFUL art of ace Jiang Cheng and bi & aro Wei Ying! Go give Midori some love on Twitter!

I spent a nonzero amount of time googling to double check when various terms and flags came into vogue, so if you're wondering, WWX & JC were in college in the early 2000s, before the ace and aro flags were designed. By the time they get themselves figured out, they can get their cute wristbands.

...which, yes, means these dingdongs spent about a solid decade living together before realizing that was what they wanted to do forever. 😉

This also means Jiang Yanli and her unnamed wife here are getting married between when California started recognizing same-sex marriages in 2008 and the Obergefell v. Hodges ruling in 2015! THIS SHIT'S RECENT!!!

Happy Pride, thank you for reading, check out more LGBTQIA+ sweetness on my #PrideMonthSnippets Masterpost!

[vtforpedro]

health/medical update - TW surgery

wellllllllll in five? six? days it'll be 27 months of the health stuff. and 27 months of me refusing a lumbar puncture but !!!! we have reached the point I suspected would come someday lol gotta get an LP to officially diagnose IIH. my neurosurgeon pm said yeah this is what you have. he actually read my entire eight-page 'diary of symptoms'. remember how I said I've been feeling extremely unwell and sick for months and it's getting worse? that's an IIH thing. I actually read about it not long before his appointment and sobbed my eyes out for half an hour lmao but my doctor said it was characteristic of IIH and no one has ever told me that before. he told me numerous things no one has told me about IIH before and he is an IIH expert so I gotta trust him, right? pretty sure my pcp blacklisted me because I was *checks notes* asking her to help figure out what was wrong. also my neurologist's office has been flat out ignoring me and not even calling me about results since february 28th :)))))) pretty sure that's malpractice :))))))))))))) anyway. if I do the lumbar puncture and have normal pressure, he said we have to treat this as some crazy headache thing and I'm like the fuck we do 🙃 but w/e if the pressure is high: brain surgery :') he said it's the only actual treatment for IIH. I thought the medication was but I got the impression from him it's a bandaid type of thing. and it's not the brain surgery that we originally talked about which is a lot more experimental because they haven't come up with better tech or techniques for it. the surgery he would do is still, ya know, brain surgery, but it's almost guaranteed to relieve symptoms completely not without its complications, but I gotta focus on the lumbar puncture first lmao my second big appointment that we've been waiting 2.5 months for is on thursday. so not only is it a consult with an IIH expert, we are now getting a second opinion on surgery. but considering my neurosurgeon used to work there and created the specialty department with another doctor I'll be going to 😭 they're gonna say the same thing was really hoping weight loss and the med would work :/ but my body just won't lose any more weight and I'm suffering even while on this medication, albeit at a low dose ._. part of me wonders if he's all about the surgery now because he's a surgeon and that's what he likes and is biased but hhhhh the man is an IIH expert and refuses to believe the main thing I saw him for, chiari malformation, is actually real and not just caused by IIH lsjflsjf I like him a lot. he's very tired I haven't gotten an LP but I've been telling my mom for the last month if he says surgery he won't do it without the LP and that's what he said so wheeeeeeee. if they say the same stuff at the neuro hospital on the 17th, gonna get that scheduled and ask 'em to pump me full of 'idc' meds so we can all get through it kinda don't want brain surgery. kinda don't want to keep living in agony more tho :')

[lady-ashfade]

stranger things shipping

name: Lily

pronouns: she/her

what do you look like: Short, olive skin tone, dark wavy hair, and hazel eyes.

what are you like: I have autism, but most people wouldn't think that. and when they do find out, they hit me up with "you look normal" anyways, I'm shy around new people, and I tend not to speak to them as much. But when I'm around friends/family, I'm extremely open and talkative. Other things about me is I'm sarcastic, loyal, empathic, and a good problem solver.

hobbies: listening to music, going on hikes, writing, and swimming

anything I should know about you: I pretty much only wear skirts and dresses, I have 5 cats, and I have a scar on my ring finger, from when I was four years old.

I wanna be shipped with the older group. Both male please.

Thank you for being here! And for participating in this event.

Now who do I ship you with?..

—

..

…

..

I ship you with Steve.

You are Nancy’s other friend in season one. You didn’t talk much in school but people fell for you anyway because are just like Nancy. Sweet and girly.

You only start to speak to Steve when he was together with Nancy but you stayed away from him because he was kinda of a asshole.

Yes, you where there with them during season one. But you were with Jonathan and Nancy.

But in season two you got pulled in with Dustin and Steve because you were coming to talk to Nancy at the same time. Then you guys shared moments, he started to forget about Nancy and noticed you. Wondering why he didn’t before. But you backed away from him because he was still your best friend boyfriend.

He was one of those people who said “You look normal” And immediately apologize because he realized that was a shitty thing to say. But he was just too cute and worry, that you had to forgive him.

You confess to each other when you got jealous of Robin when they seemed really close. But in the middle of the underground Russian hideout, you kissed and then got yelled at. That’s understandable because you guys could die at any moment.

HC’s

Listening to music while hanging out. Mostly waiting for the kids.

He also makes you a mix tape.

Him also being a swimmer, so little pool dates.

Sneaking into the poll after hours.

Going one hiking dates. Hun having a backpack filled with everything you guys would need. (Like a mom-)

Him not liking you cats at first but soon grows to love them. He cuddles them more then you now.

[anxiousnerdwritings]

hiya! it's me, the one and only knull anon!! ik you arent currently accepting requests or asks, and that's fine, but I recently written something for LexLuthor and I though I should share. this ask is in no way telling you to start posting again, or anything of the sort. remeber, mental health is always the most important thing! but I was thinking of you today and I was hoping you were doing good. so hopefully this piece will help improve your mood. again, you dont have to awnser this at all rn, only when you feel better!

ps, this has been spell checked by google so that's why it uppercase lol

~~~~~~

"How long do I have to wear this dress?"

"As long as the gala goes on, ___"

"Just call it a fancy party, or a luxurious gathering since its you-"

"Oh, do not get smart with me, ____"

Pulling at the top of your dress, you tried to loosen up the tightness of the neck area. It felt like a noose to you. Fortunately, the fabric was soft, extremely luxurious, and it covered every part of your body, excluding your hands and head.

Lex, on the other hand, was in some kind of fancy suit, that looked more expensive than the carpet in his penthouse. And his carpet was more expensive then your phone bill. Well, when you had a phone.

You didn't remember when he had found you, but you remember before. At least, bits and pieces of it. A home in a suburban neighborhood, a mom and a dad, a normal looking life for a kid like you. However, after a few months ago, it was far from normal.

You were given the finest things people would want in life, in return for… hanging out with lex luthor. It sounded weird at first, but you soon realized it wasn't a joke.

You werent treated as a prostitute, and not as a lover either: you weren't even legal. If you had to guess the relationship between you and Lex, it would have to be a father and daughter kind of relationship. Which also could explain why he wanted you to call him dad.

Back to this "gala", Lex actually would ban you from going to any party at all and left you with guards at all parts of the penthouse you were stationed at, sometimes even leaving you with Mercy. 

You didn't really know why he was letting you go out to this gala, but you had a few ideas. For starters, this gala was not just for anyone, it was for extremely rich people who had nothing better to do then sit around in a room. Which also explained the reason why everything looked the price of a liver.

Another possible reason was that a close colleague of your "dad" had seen you walking around in the penthouse. You never saw who it was but Lex advised you to stay out of sight when people were visiting.

Fortunately he didn't get as mad as you expected him to which was a good thing to be honest. He wasn't the type to tell you, more just reprimand you in a voice that just spelt disappointment. 

Anyway. It wasn't good to think of when he was angry with you. Right now you had to focus on the people who were trying to figure out who you were. 

Sticking close to Lex was easy, since he was 6 feet tall. Easily. And the fact that people wouldn't approach you when you were next to him. Only the people who you actually recognized either from voice or appearance were brave enough to even look in your direction.

The night was almost over when a man approached the two of you. At this point your feet were getting sore and when you asked Mercy for the time, she responded that it was almost 12: lex would definitely send you to bed as soon as you got home again. 

However, the man who approached the two of you was familiar. It only took a few seconds of going through your memories and seeing Lexs face turn to slight annoyance to realize this was Bruce Wayne.

He walked up to the two of you and smiled down at you. 

"Well, I didnt know Lex had a child. What is your name?"

You were about to respond when Lex interrupted you. "Their name is ____. And unfortunately, we were just about to leave. I hope that whatever you were going to ask can wait until later?"

Wayne's smile faltered a little, before it turned neutral. "Unfortunately, no, but it is a quick question. And one that I need to speak with you in private?" He looked at you, before speaking again, "No harm meant."

You were about to respond again, when Lex motioned to Mercy. "Mercy, could you take ____ back to the limo? I will be just a moment- oh, and do not let her out of your sight."

Mercy nodded, and taking your hand, she led you back to the elevator where the entrance was. All while everyone was focused on the two of you.

Wayne was the first to speak. "Shes not yours, is she?"

"____ is my daughter, and I hope you would have the decency to not spew this to the media. You dont seem the type of man to feed the media with info, especially not of a, young girl."

Wayne looked offended, and didnt even try to hide it in his face. "No. If anything, I was wondering why you, of all people, would be taking care of a child."

Lex did not seem offended. "Oh, but you have so many children, I thought it was a necessity." Lex leaned in a little towards Wayne and whispered, "And to be quite honest with you, it is none of your concern."

Wayne simply glared at Luthor before Lex started moving away from Wayne. 

"Well, I'm sorry to say but I believe I've kept ____ waiting for long enough. I'm afraid I must go."

He didnt wait for Wayne to say anything he simply stormed off to the elevator and left.

Wayne did nothing but walk over to the windows, where he was able to get a clear view of Mercy holding your forearm and opening the limo door while a few more guards stood near you. Lex appeared soon after with his own guards and ushered you in the car. 

Lifting his hand towards his ear, he commed his own children.

Whispering, he said "All of you better be following that limo when I get down there."

He heard Dick chuckle. "Oh, dont worry Bruce. I think the 4 trackers on that thing will be enough."

Bruce didnt say anything as he watched the limo drive off into the distance. Figuring it was time to dip, he left his wine glass empty at a table and left the room, and trying to figure out who was the strange girl he had just met.

~~~~~~

oof so now as I paste this here from google docs I feel like an asshole by sending you this so I just want to remind you that you can awnser this whenever you want! I might send in some more in the future but I want you to prioritize mental health over tumblr! your health matter, both physically and mentally! and dont forget it! with lots of love,

- knull anon

Sorry I didn’t see this sooner! This is really good!💖💕 I love the idea of Lex Luther and Bruce Wayne beefing over poor Reader. Having two extremely rich, intelligent and determined people duke it out just appeals to me for some reason.

Don’t feel bad, thank you for sending this in while I was gone🥰💚. It was nice.

[norcalbruja]

Not really an "update" but definitely a note

So Hera is one of the new spirits who saw me having a meltdown a couple of days ago, was shocked/horrified that I apparently lose my shit and start screaming for help all the time, and she's wondering why the fuck nobody's HELPED me yet.

Especially not 97% of the anito. Hera is extremely concerned that the only named Tagalog spirits who have shown up are three sea-gods that I have a REALLY hard time believing are the actual anito, what with the reading I got saying that the anito abandoned me and I guess I'm shit out of luck (my phrasing, not the reader's). So I get the fun conflicting emotions where I want to believe them, but I also know that any Tagalog spirits claiming that they're the anito and they actually DO care about me are just AUTOMATICALLY suspicious now.

--

Anyway, so a couple of days ago, the Water-Spirit and I were talking about something or another and then Spirit-Me devolved into screaming, "HELPPPPPPPPPP!!! HELLLLLLLP!!!! LET ME OUT!!!! LET ME OUT OF THIS FUCKING NOTHINGNESS I'M STUCK IN!!! SOMEONE WHO'S WILLING AND ABLE TO HELP ME, PLEASE!!! I CAN'T FIND A JOB AND NOBODY WITH MONEY CARES ABOUT MY ART, AND I CAN'T MOVE OUT OF MY MOM'S SHITTY ANCIENT APARTMENT BECAUSE I HAVE NO JOB!!! I SWEAR I'LL STOP BOTHERING THE SPIRITS IF SOMEONE JUST FIGURES OUT A WAY TO HELP ME, PLEASE!!! I WOULD NOT BE BEGGING SPIRITS FOR HELP IF THERE WAS ANY NORMAL WAY TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!! PLEASE!!! LET ME OUTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!"

Hera just stopped and stared in horror as the Water-Spirit and Dionysus started frantically trying to calm me down, and she said, "That's it??? That's all you're doing??? Where are her people's gods?!"

And Dionysus was like "Hera, we told you already--most of them aren't here. A reader told her that the anito hate her poor-person begging and quit on her. And they said the anito think her blog, her fantasy writing, and basically everything she did regarding the anito, are blasphemous."

And Hera said "Yes, I know that! But getting a house and a job has nothing to do with her art, so they could at least help her with that! How is she going to make LESS-BLASPHEMOUS art if she's always miserable and stuck with her mother?"

So Dionysus said "Well we don't know WHY they're not here, but they're not."

And Haik Number Four arrived and he just wearily went, "Is that what people think of us now? Even if the others are mad at her, they are not like the Christian God--most of us shouldn't think suffering makes you WORTHY or BETTER or anything like that. You pray for help, and most pagan spirits think you should GET IT."

That just sent me into another frantic wave of begging Haik specifically for help, so Hera just "dragged me out" of the Otherworld for a few minutes going, "STOP. STOP. I DON'T LIKE THIS."

I may have heard a spiritual "door" slam shut, so the others couldn't talk to us.

When I found out my brother died, the Dagda (Irish Pantheon) did something similar and reluctantly "kicked me out of the Otherworld" entirely for a few days. He said I needed to process my grief the normal way instead of trying to feel better using the spirit-world as a coping mechanism.

But this was only for a few minutes, and Hera told me, "Honey. Please. Why are you doing this? I don't like it."

And I said, "I don't like it either, but if houses here didn't cost a million dollars, and if rent was less than two thousand a month for a fucking tiny studio apartment, I would not be begging the spirits for help!"

She told me, "I know. I don't like that you are reduced to doing this. You should have gotten help WAY before this, and the ones you want help from don't seem to want to do it! It's already degrading for people to beg for help, and you've been begging whoever listens for who knows how long?!"

I got irrationally mad and just seethed at her, "DEGRADING??? THAT'S FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT TO LOOK BAD. I NEED SOME FUCKING HELP, HERA--LIKE AN ART CAREER AND A HOUSE! OR A MILLION DOLLARS TO GET THE HOUSE, AND THEN I CAN FOCUS ON MY ART!!! I DON'T CARE IF I'M DEGRADING MYSELF! I WILL KEEP BEGGING THE SPIRITS FOR HELP UNTIL I GET SOME GODDAMN HELP!!!"

So I didn't attack her or anything, but I started screaming and thrashing in anger/pain, and then Lola Buwaya came around to just grab me and shake me. She's done that a couple of times when I have an especially bad fit of rage/despair.

And it's not GOOD, but it gets me to stop, so it's "the stuff we have to do for now." Like how Hypnos made the obvious comment that a lot of my sleep problems are due to stress, and if I had an income and/or my own place, I would sleep a lot better. But I don't have either, so I have to constantly ask a sleep-god to put me under.

Hera didn't like the shaking, either. She just went, "EXCUSE ME, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! She's not a fish!"

Lola told her, "You all are too nice! You pretend she's a normal person! One who can control her feelings and listen when people want her to calm down! She is not, and she will not be until she can get the hell away from her mother!"

The cursing surprised me because Lola does not curse a lot. Much like the Water-Spirit, she talks formally/archaically most of the time and it's really jarring when she finally drops a swear-word.

Anyway, so she left now that I wasn't screaming anymore, and Hera just sighed and went, "Where are your people's gods in all this? You have three possible sea-gods and one water-spirit husband, but they don't tend to deal with buying a house or artistic pursuits. I suppose I'll help you with what I can, sweetheart. Just keep doing what you're doing with the Water-Spirit."

And she's already said she'll try to help me a couple of times, but this time was really striking because I was in a shitty place and having someone be NICE felt weird. It was so foreign that it almost felt painful, especially since she wasn't asking me to do anything (different/new) in exchange for her help.

So I told her "Hera, why are you so NICE to me? I mean, your relationship with Zeus kind of precedes... both of you."

She said, "Well, you and him are not me and Zeus. You two have a GOOD relationship. That is my concern, so that's why I'm helping."

And the "closed door" was probably open by now, so Dionysus came in and went, "Fuck my dad, babe. What are you girls talking about?"

I went, "The same shit I keep talking about, Dionysus. I need money for my own place, and I can't seem to get any. I want to do art for a living, but most people I ask about it never answer me back, or they take weeks or months to finally say they can't actually help, but my art sounds REALLY REALLY cool. And how it seems like every other spirit thinks something is wrong with the sheer absence of the anito in my life, and the reasons that people have told me for why the anito aren't here makes a lot of the Tagalog spirits freak out."

And Dionysus sighed and went "Well, this day was too exciting. Go to sleep now, babe, it's 3am."