#anyway maybe I’ll think of something better sometime soon to write for you all :)

[skoulsons]

Small, uh, drabble, I suppose

Ellie stormed out of the bar, heavy inhales and exhales as she directed her steps down the street and as far away from him as she could be.

“Hey!” Someone called, but her ears were filled with chatter and anger and every fucking memory of him.

A hang grazed her arm, her skin slipping out of its grasp as she turned. “Don’t fucking touch me, Tommy!”

“Hey!” He shouted, his anger filled to the brim.

She stopped, eyes wide as she faced him head on. “Why the fuck is he in there? He’s never in there.”

“You two need to talk,” Tommy started, quieting his voice down, attempting to get Ellie to match his tone.

It didn’t work. “What, are you our fucking meditator now? Get a better fucking hobby,” she spit, scoffing at his attempt to try and force them to reconcile.

“You two need to talk,” he repeated.

“No, we don’t. There’s nothing to talk about. You know all about it, don’t you? He lied. I’m done with him, for good.”

“Ellie…” he started, but her back was already turned, heavy steps in the direction of their house her garage.

Tommy sighed, running a hand down his face as he turned back towards the bar. Joel was standing on the inside of the double doors, whiskey in hand. He looked at Tommy like he was a deer caught in Tommy’s headlights. “Joel…”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Tommy.”

-

No amount of strumming guitar, wood carving, or reading could put Joel to sleep. He heard the whole conversation, it looping like a chord progression in his head. There’s nothing to talk about.

What he’d give to talk to her again.

But her animosity towards him was otherworldly. She was in the bar not ten seconds before she was out again after she caught one glimpse of him. Tommy had watched keenly, racing out after her as she roughly pushed through a crowd of other Jackson residents.

He couldn’t get a word in to her no matter how hard he tried.

Maybe she’s awake. Maybe now. Chosen ignorance, maybe, but he had to try. It had been almost two years, there had to be something there.

He swung his legs over the side of his bed, lightly tapping the cover of his An Idiot’s Guide to Space book before setting it on his nightstand and loosely throwing a flannel on.

-

Joel stood at her door for ten minutes, fingers fiddling with the knob as he thought about what to say. That is, if she even let him get a word in.

He inhaled heavily and exhaled slow, leaning close to the door frame. “Ellie?”

Nothing. Again, “Ellie?”

He turned the knob.

She was asleep. She was on her stomach, arms tucked behind her pillow as her cheek was pressed into the pillow as she breathed heavily, light snores filling the space. Her covers were strewn across her bed, her comforter lightly covering the lower half of her legs.

Joel smiled at the sight of her sleeping. She was calm. She was…probably happy, right now. Dreaming in a world that didn’t have him in it.

She adjusted, turning on to her left side as she tucked her left arm under her pillow and curled her right in front of her chest. She was facing him now and Joel saw her shirt.

It was his. It was one of his old shirts. A navy blue t-shirt stained with dirt and even a little blood. The same tears of fabric at the shoulder seams and a few small holes around the lower abdomen. The right sleeve was a lighter blue, discolored from being exposed to too much sunlight from its days sitting on Joel’s bed as the sun shined down on it.

Joel breathed in sharply.

Don’t fucking touch me.

I’m done with him, for good.

[moonstruckme]

hey mae! it’s been awhile since i’ve sent an ask but im always reading your work girl! i love how you write tbh. if you’re up to it do you think you could write something with poly marauders, where the reader has trouble eating and making themself eat due to poor appetite. my appetite really does come and go and ever since covid (maybe before) it’s like eating makes me feel revolted. sometimes i just don’t feel like eating bc of other things like depression, adhd, anxiety. i was just wondering if you could write something with the boys helping out the reader with finding out what sounds good, cooking, and eating if possible. sometimes having someone around to talk to and hang out with makes it so much easier to deal -🌶️

Hey Pepper, thank you sm! And thanks for being patient with me <3

cw: lack of appetite, mention of skipping meals

poly!marauders x gn!reader ♡ 1.1k words

The sun’s going down, the last dregs of its light spilling brilliant and golden over the book in your lap, and you can feel your boyfriends starting to get restless. Well, two of them. 

“If we’re missing half the ingredients,” Sirius says, trailing James into the kitchen, “it’s not going to be any good.” 

James only tsks. “Ye of little faith. That’s what improvisation is for.” He starts pulling things down from the cabinet. 

“You’re not even going to glance at the recipe?” 

“I don’t need to. I know the general vibe.” 

“Help!” Sirius calls towards the living room. “He’s gone off the rails. Remus, come fix it.” 

Remus turns around to look over the back of the sofa, his shoulder brushing yours as he does. He’s sitting right up against you despite the couch being empty, not that you mind. Remus is sort of like a cat that wants to be near you but not always to be pet. His touches are often like this, passive gestures like a hand on your head or his thigh pressed against yours. It works for you just fine; you can feel the affection bleeding into you from any point of contact. 

“Don’t you think we should just eat out?” Sirius asks, tilting his head and doing that thing with his eyes that you all pretend doesn’t work on you. 

Impressively, Remus keeps his face impassive. “I’m having leftover brussels sprouts,” he replies, “so it’s not really my concern. Anyway, James has a good history with not following recipes.” 

“Exactly,” James says, grinning at Sirius, who scowls. But then he fixes his gaze on Remus. “So why are you having that, Rem? Have what I’m making.” 

“Because they’re going to go bad, and I’m not hungry enough for a big meal.” The last part is said somewhat quieter, directed towards the living room as he turns back around and picks up his own book. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see James frown, but he glances at Sirius and they seem to collectively decide not to push it. Remus’ appetite isn’t much better than yours. He has his better days, but it’s not uncommon for him not to feel up to what your other boyfriends would consider a whole meal or to eat only chocolate until Sirius hounds him into something more substantial. 

James looks to you hopefully. “You’ll have some, won’t you sweetheart?” 

You wince, hating to let him down, and from the look on James’ face he clocks the guilt in your expression before even you get a chance to say, “I don’t think I’m really up to it tonight, either.” 

James deflates, but he’s clearly trying to put on a brave face. “That’s alright. I think I’ll just save it for another night, then.” 

“I’m sorry,” you say, setting your book facedown on the armrest and turning around to face him more fully. “You could still make it and just put leftovers in the freezer. Maybe I’ll have some tomorrow.” You wince again as soon as you say it. No promises, though.

The smile James gives you is comforting if not totally satisfied. “It’s okay. I’ll just make it another time, it’s not a problem.” 

You return his smile, close-lipped. Sirius is looking at you with narrowed eyes, arms crossed like he’s sizing you up. 

“What are you going to eat?” he asks. 

“Hm?” 

“What are you going to have instead?” You hesitate, and he tilts his head knowingly, a piece of hair slipping from behind his ear to drape over his shoulder. “You need to have something, especially since you didn’t have lunch.” 

From the kitchen, James looks at you. “You didn’t?” 

“I just…don’t feel like it.” It’s a feeble argument even to your own ears, and the look Sirius gives you says that he thinks so, too. 

“You can’t miss two meals,” he says obstinately. “Even Remus is having some brussels sprouts.”

You look to Remus to be offended at the even Remus comment, but he only shrugs. You’re on your own. 

“What sounds good?” he asks you. 

You try not to pout. “Nothing. Everything sounds gross.” 

“C’mon, baby.” Sirius leans against the countertop. “It doesn’t have to be strictly dinner food, yeah? Just anything that sounds like you’d be willing to eat it.” 

You think for a minute. Remus touches the back of his hand to your leg, knuckles soothing over the skin beside your knee. 

“I guess…ice cream sounds okay,” you say hesitantly. “But I know that’s not exactly nutritious…” 

“Would a milkshake be close enough?” James pipes up. 

You shrug. “I guess.” 

He grins. “I can do that for you, love. Just gimme a sec.” 

James is a loud cook. You go back to your book while cabinet doors slam and the blender whirs and you hear a muffled “oh, shit” as something is undoubtedly dropped on the floor, but a minute later he’s bringing you a glass of something thick and chocolate-y looking. You smile at the added garnish of mint and a straw, reaching for it. 

“Thanks, Jamie.” 

He winks. “Anytime.” 

Remus is the only one courteous enough not to obviously watch while you take a sip, and you feel your eyebrows raise as you look up at James. 

“This is really good,” you say. He practically glows at the praise. “I didn’t even know we had chocolate ice cream.” 

Sirius barks a laugh, and James’ smile widens. 

“What?” you ask. 

“We don’t,” he admits. “Will it ruin your appetite if I tell you it’s not actually ice cream?” 

You shake your head, sucking at the straw. “I’m already drinking it, so.” 

James beams. He really is looking very proud of himself. “It’s a protein shake. A pretty balanced meal, actually.” 

“Nice!” You grin at him, taking another hearty slurp mostly because you know it’ll please him. “It’s perfect, thank you.” 

“Gotta keep our sweetheart fed,” he says, bending down for a kiss. Sirius and Remus’ hums of approval nearly harmonize, and you and James share an elated look while they both do their best to pretend like it didn’t happen. 

“Can I try?” Remus asks, and you tilt the cup towards him in invitation. 

He wraps his lips around your straw, sipping hesitantly. He looks mildly impressed. 

“Could you make me one of those too?” 

From the look on James’ face, he’d be delighted to. “Course, love.” He plants a smacker on Remus’ cheek and nearly knocks Sirius over as he beelines for the kitchen. 

“This is just excellent,” Sirius gripes, but you see the satisfaction in his expression. “Now that you two have blown up his ego, I’ll have to eat something he makes too.” 

“Correct,” James says brightly. “And you should be so lucky.” 

[vrystalius]

How would Giyu and Sanemi react if they were in love with the same girl?

❕Giyu and Sanemi falling in love with the same girl

Note: Thank you for requesting <3 Although I do really enjoy writing for Sanemi, writing for different characters is refreshing! Anyways, enjoy! I had a lot of fun writing this.

Pairing: Giyu x hashira!fem!reader x Sanemi

💙 Giyu Tomioka 💙

Giyu would be admiring you quietly from afar, trying not to make it too obvious that he’s completely fallen for you. He’ll resort to just hold conversations here and there, and then overthink every little thing you said and how your facial expressions changed ever so lightly.

Although, he will become incredibly nervous whenever you’re near him. On the outside, Giyu seems nonchalant and maybe even slightly annoyed about you sitting close to him during the meetings, but on the inside, Giyu’s heart is racing and his head will be spinning, his thoughts going one thousand miles per hour. His hand will be gripping his thighs or forearms tightly in an attempt to calm himself.

Sometimes, Giyu will try to hang out with you, asking if he could eat together with you or train alongside you. He will be quiet for the whole duration of the hang-out and will only answer your questions as short as possible. You two will be having a lot of dry conversations at first.

Giyu also thinks that he is not even worth to be loved by you. You’re such an incredibly strong hashira and appreciated by so many people, surely you have already someone else in mind you’d like to date. Anyone but him.

He soon realises that Sanemi has been paying more attention to you lately. He asked to train with you more often and then inviting you to grab something to eat afterwards. Giyu saw how Sanemi’s eyes would soften up ever so slightly and how his pupils dilated. He looked more content around you, wich is rare for the wind hashira.

Giyu felt a wave of sadness wash over him. Sanemi would probably have more of a chance with you than him. He’s stronger, more handsome, and probably be a better lover overall. Giyu tries to tell himself that it’s over and that he has no chance and should move on, but for some reason he wants to keep going. Giyu wants you and he’ll try his best to win you over. Even if he has to compete with Sanemi.

“Do you want to go eat Salmon Daikon with me? It’s okay if you’re already busy, I’ll go on my own if you are.”

💚 Sanemi Shinazugawa 💚

Sanemi, after realising that he fell for you, would be very angry at himself for letting his emotions go loose like this. He hated himself for it and got extremely rude to you whenever you tried striking up a conversation with him. He was trying to push you away from himself in order to shield himself from potential heartbreak and to protect you from himself. Sanemi knows he’s not a good person and he does not deserve you. He’ll be a bad influence for you anyway.

But after a while, Sanemi began to accept his feelings and calm himself. He apologised to you for being unreasonably rude and started giving you small gifts as some sort of apology. Instead of presenting them to you, Sanemi shoved the small gift box into your hands and would leave as quickly as he came.

Slowly but surely, Sanemi began to hang out with you more. He’d invite you to spar with him and afterwards maybe go out for a bite. But he’s only asking because you’re such a strong hashira and he’d like to train with you! No other reason.

Sanemi is trying to become a better man for you. He’s becoming kinder and more talkative, trying to open up more and more. He even showed you the rhino beetles he’s raising. Sanemi never showed or mentioned them at all. It was kind of cute how childishly excited he got when showing them off.

Sanemi only realised that Giyu is interested in you as well after one time where you rejected to hang out with Sanemi, explaining that you already had plans with Giyu. He grumbled and stomped off, fuming in anger. You wanted to hang out with that prick? Giyu thinks he’s better than everyone, why do you talk to that weirdo?

Sanemi gets very jealous of Giyu very quickly, giving him nasty side-eyes from across the training grounds whenever he sees you eating lunch with him or just simply talking to him. Oh how he just wants to beat this guy up.

So, Sanemi tries to be faster than him. He’ll ask you out days in advance if you want to train with him and went even as far as sending Kagaya a letter, asking to be send on missions alongside you more often, arguing that your and his breathing technique are compatible and you two work so well together.

He was attempting to badmouth Giyu in order to have more of a chance with you, but quickly realised that just made you upset with him, so he’ll try to restrain himself.

“Hey, wanna go grab some snacks tomorrow? I’m craving udon for some reason.”

“Why do you keep asking her to hang out, huh? You wanna hog all her free time?!”

“You have been asking her to her to join you for almost every day now. I would like to hang out with her some time.”

“Bullshit. You know exactly what you’re doing.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, dipshit.”

“Giyu? Sanemi? What are you two arguing about?”

“Nothin’.”

“….”

💠

This was so fun! Thanks for reading! My requests are open for both the hashira and the demons, so don’t be shy to request something <3

Anyways, make sure to EAT, SLEEP and DRINK enough!

Take care of yourselves <3

Here’s my masterlist for the hashira

Here’s my masterlist for the demons

[salty-croissants]

Bullfrog and Rayman/Ramon x g/n reader : taking a bullet for them

I’ve had this little idea for a while now , so I decided to finally sit and write it down !

You see , while I’m the biggest fan of anything regarding fluff I do enjoy a bit of angst sometimes too , so I ended up getting a rush of inspiration imagining the reader protecting the boys with them getting all worried afterwards :,I 

I’ll definitely start working on the requests I received as soon as I can by the way , I just like to post some personal works whenever I get inspired … also because I literally can’t stop it when that happens :,)

Anyway , hope this turned out okay ! 

Details : use of gender neutral reader ;

established relationships ; 

presence of blood , bullet wounds , occasional swearing and general angst with following fluff

Bullfrog 💚

As soon as he turns around and sees you drop on your knees , clutching the bleeding wound with a hiss of pain , Bullfrog immediately drops everything he’s doing and rushes towards you , ignoring the bullets flying in his direction :

he has to get you out of there … he has to do it fast … nothing else matters … 

His small but strong arms pick you and he carries you away from the raging battlefield , the sensation of your blood dripping on his hands filling him with fear …

No matter what the Warden will have to say about this setback , the safety of his beloved is top priority .

When he finally puts you down after reaching a safe spot , Bullfrog can feel the crushing weight of his guilt taking over his every thought , enough to almost make him dizzy …

He knows full well that that bullet was meant for him . 

He should’ve noticed it sooner … why didn’t he notice it sooner ? 

Maybe then you wouldn’t have jumped forward to shield him …

This … this was all his fault . 

The sound of you coughing out blood is what makes Bullfrog snap back to reality .

< B … Bullfrog … ? > 

< Yes y/n , I’m here , I’m right here mon amour , you’re going to be okay , I promise … you just have to stay awake . > 

His voice sounds so soothing and sweet ( tough a bit raspy after his crazy escape ) , and while he begins to take off your coat to get a better look at the wound you can’t help but smile a little in front of his sheer devotion to you …

His movements are gentle but quick , and before you can even process what’s happening Bullfrog has already patched you up to prevent you from losing any more blood …

It’s now that the situation is under control that he brings it up . 

< You really shouldn’t have done that , y/n . If the bullet hit you someplace else with some more precision you could’ve died . > 

You look down at the floor of the alleyway you’re both currently hiding in , feeling his worried eyes on you .

< I … I’m sorry . I didn’t really think it through … 

I panicked : you were in danger and I didn’t want you to get hurt , I just … didn’t know what else to do … > 

Bullfrog’s gaze softens , and before you know it you feel his arms around you , holding you carefully to avoid hurting you more …

< I know , mon cher … you’re always looking out for me , and I love you so much for that reason alone , but please don’t ever do something like that ever again : 

je … je ne peux pas te perdre . > 

You gladly lean into his loving embrace , hugging him back as the pain brought by the wound in your waist disappears momentarily : 

you were just thankful to have Bullfrog by your side , and thankful for his endless love and care for you .

Rayman 🧡

It takes some time for Rayman to realize that an unidentified man just tried to shoot him while the two of you were walking back home after that night’s date , and it’s when he hears your sharp breaths and sees your blood staining his shoes that he fully takes in what happened …

< Y/N !!! > 

He rushes towards you , panic taking over him as his shaky hands get a hold of you : 

you’re hurt … you’re hurt really bad , and it’s all because you protected him .

< Oh - oh g-god - ohmygod —

I can’t … I gotta - H-HELP !!! > 

It doesn’t take long for someone to notice what is going on , and before you know it you can hear the deafening noise coming from the sirens of the ambulance and the many police cars all around the street , as well as a familiar voice …

< Are they going to be okay ?? W-will they live ??? 

Please , they have to live … they have to … > 

Unfortunately you can’t bring yourself to listen further : soon the loss of blood makes you pass out , your blurry vision slowly fading to black as the last thing you feel is someone picking you up from the ground .

Rayman really isn’t handling what happened very well , and the days following the incident are absolutely awful for him …

He ends up drinking a lot more , unable to eat and let alone sleep , and whenever he receives the inevitable calls from the Board of Directors “inviting” him to pull himself together for his show’s sake , he completely loses it … 

< Don’t you understand ?? My . Partner . Got . FUCKING SHOT !!! 

I might never s-see them again , and you want me to “keep it together” ?!? > 

Whenever he stays up at night , waiting for any sorts of news about your condition from the hospital , Rayman can do nothing but silently pray that you’re going to be fine … that he will be able to hold you and kiss you again , and that it’s not all lost … 

… but deep down he really isn’t sure if that’s what’s going to happen , and that terrifies him more than anything .

Then finally , one morning he receives the awaited news : 

you’re alive , you’re feeling a lot better and , most importantly , you’re actually on your way to his lounge ( the last part being a little something you planned to surprise him ) . 

Rayman is overjoyed , and when he hears a knock on the door and sees your beautiful smile waiting for him behind it he can’t contain himself anymore …

< Oh y/n … y/n my love … I-I’m so glad you’re okay , I missed you so much ! > 

He hugs you tightly , sobbing next to your ear , and inevitably you end up crying too …

< I’m here Ray … I’m right here , I’m never leaving you again , I promise … > 

You let out a sigh when Rayman’s lips meet yours , locking them in a loving , passionate kiss …

The two of you really needed it , after everything that’s happened .

Ramon 🖤

Oh boy is he enraged … 

After a moment of silent shock , he glares at that one member of the Board of Directors security that had the guts to harm his darling … 

< You … PIECE OF SHIT !!! > 

Without any regards at all for his safety he rushes towards the man , shooting at him multiple times … even after his dead body has long since hit the floor . 

It takes him a while to calm down , but after taking a few deep , shaky breath , Ramon finally rushes towards you , using his coat to stop the bullet wound from bleeding .

< Hiss - > 

< I know it hurts … but you’re gonna be okay love , just … just bear with me , okay … ? I got you … > 

You nod in response , a little smile appearing on your face as he leans down to kiss your forehead . 

After a few minutes , you start to feel less dizzy than before , and similarly to Bullfrog it’s only then that Ramon confronts you about what happened .

< Now … we really gotta talk about this , y/n , cause I am not about to lose the only person that gives me hope in this hell because they decide to shield me from a bullet without any regard for themselves and their safety . > 

< I … *cough* … I had to though , it would’ve hit y - > 

You can feel Ramon’s hands on your shoulders , and when you look up at him you can see a very serious expression on his face …

< y/n . I mean it . 

I need you to look at me and promise to never take a bullet for me again . 

I … I wouldn’t be able to go on if you were gone … do you understand … ? > 

Your quietly listen to him , your eyes never leaving his , and when you lean forward to give him a little kiss on the nose you hear him sigh softly …

< I won’t … I promise . 

I love you , Ram … sorry for making you worry . >

Ramon smiles in response , holding you closer to him while the sun sets behind the window , illuminating the two of you and the corpses of the Board of Directors around the room …

< I love you too , y/n … very , very much . > 

[morgana-larkin]

Hey! saw u asking for prompts. I REALLY LOVE ur fic 'worth it'!

Anyway, can you write a fic based on '' we get married in our heads'" "I miss you on a train" and 'I think about you' basically based on About You by The 1975. Maybe mel and r have met in Italy, when they're both in vacation. Became real close or something but never really did talk and pursue what was really going on between them because both are scared, then they part ways and never had contact with each other 'cause they thought it's better that way, until reader arrives at abbott as the new teacher not knowing she'll see the redhead again

Hey, thank you for the prompt! I’m glad you’re liking Worth It. I hope you like this, it has a lot of angst because apparently my brain deemed it necessary but a happy ending.

Don’t Let Me Go

Warnings: Angst with a happy ending, Sad Mel (yes this is a warning because I don’t like it when she’s upset)

Words: 3.6

Beautiful green eyes stare back at you in your mind. You just got back from Italy where you were teaching a child English during the summer and that’s where you also met her, Melissa Schemmenti. She was visiting some family members of hers during summer vacation for 2 months.

You still remember meeting her. You were sitting on the patio of a coffee shop reading an Italian- English dictionary so you can help teach the child better. She saw you sitting there and thought you were beautiful, sitting there, with some sunglasses on, a smile on your face and the sun hitting you, making it look like you’re glowing. She decided to walk up to you and start conversation.

“That book makes you stand out as a tourist.” She told you and you looked up at her and saw those eyes, those green eyes that you still think about in your mind.

“Well I think the book and the fact that I’ll look completely clueless if someone talks to me in Italian will make people know I’m a tourist.” You replied back to her and she laughed. A laugh that you think about constantly that you hear in your mind.

You and Melissa became friends after that, you went out to places together and she showed you the places that Italy had to offer. You learned that she was a teacher as well and that she lived in Philly. You both talked about everything and told each other all about yourselves. And in the 2 months of you two knowing each other, you both became attracted to each other, although neither of you mentioned it. And then when the time came for both of you to go back home, you both decided it was best to cut contact, since you won’t see each other again.

“Are you sure?” You asked her and she nodded.

“I had a great time with you these past 2 months but we’re not going to see each other again so why keep contact?” She said and you nodded. “It’s for the best.”

5 years later…

You recently just moved from New York to south Philly. You were on a train, just coming back from picking up the last of your things from your parents house in New York that you gave to them to keep for you. You were listening to music when you saw someone with red hair walk on and then you thought about her, the beautiful Italian woman you met 5 years ago during the summer. You still think about her of course, and wondering if you should have told her how you felt before you parted ways.

The next day you wake up, you’re starting your new job as Abbott Elementary’s new 3rd grade teacher. You walk into the entrance of the school and went to the main office to get your badge and classroom key. As soon as you walked you ran into someone. You went to go apologise to the person, but as soon as you looked at them you froze. It was her, the woman who still sometimes occupies your thoughts and dreams.

“Melissa?” You say to her quietly, in disbelief that she was right here in front of you. Melissa was just as shocked as you were, and then you looked into those green eyes that you only saw in your dreams now and they made you feel safe.

“Y/N?” She said back to you, just as quietly. “Wha-what are you doing here?” She asked you.

“I-I’m the new 3rd grade teacher.” You stuttered out. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m a 2nd grade teacher here, have been for many years now.” She said.

Before either of you can say anything else you get interrupted. “Hey Melissa, can I talk to about the curriculum we got this year I have a couple of questions.” A younger teacher said to her. And then she saw you. “Oh hi, are you a new teacher here?” She asked you.

“Ya my name is Y/N Y/L/N, the new 3rd grade teacher.” You tell her and hold out a hand for her and she shook it.

“Oh how lovely to meet you! My name is Janine Teagues. I’m a second grade teacher here like Melissa here.” She told you.

You left Melissa and Janine to talk and you went to your classroom to set up before the kids get here in 30 minutes. You didn’t get the chance to do it the week prior as you were in the middle of moving and the principal said it’s fine and just emailed all the information that you needed to know.

You were putting up some fun posters with the help of a stool when she walked in without you realising it.

“Y/N?” She said. You didn’t know she was there so it took you by surprise and you fell off the stool face first. She caught you, of course, and when you realised she did, you opened your eyes and saw hers staring at you. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.” She said and let go of you when you found your footing.

“It’s alright, you caught me so it’s fine, no harm done.” You told her and walked over to your desk to organise some papers. “Was there something you needed?” You asked her. You tried to seem calm on the outside instead of freaking out like you were on the inside. The truth is that you missed her. You missed her as a friend. You only knew each other for 2 months but you became really close and even knowing that you only had 2 months, feelings had to of course get in the way.

“I thought I’d never see you again.” She said and when you looked up at her, she looked hurt. Hurt about what? You don’t know. Melissa was trying to be neutral about this, you both thought it’d be better to cut contact before you parted 5 years ago. And in that 5 years, she never forgot you, and seeing you again, she realised how much she missed you. She remembered showing you around, walking and running around, hand in hand, smiling and laughing. She thought about finding you constantly, she could have asked one of her guys to find you and they would have, but that scared her. She became attracted to you in those 2 months and she never told you, she knew you’d never like her back the way that she likes you. She knew you were attracted to women, but she thought you’d never be attracted to her.

“Well considering that we said it would be better to not have contact with each other when we parted, then I can see why you thought that.” You said coldly and she was taken aback by that. The truth is that while you were excited to see her again, it was originally her idea to cut contact, and she convinced you that it was for the best. And now here she is talking to you after she so easily left you behind. “Look Melissa, I don’t know what you want but, we became friends in Italy but we haven’t spoken in 5 years because you thought that would be for the best.” You told her and she nodded looking guilty. “So I think it would be best if we continue that way.” You told her and it hurt to tell her that but you have to protect yourself against her. She hurt you 5 years ago and while you wanted to be her friend again like before, she might just hurt you again. You’re not going to take that chance again.

Melissa’s heart broke a bit at you telling her that. She missed you and wanted to see if she could reconnect with you again. But if you don’t want to then she can’t force you. “If that’s what you want.” She told you and you looked at her.

“I think it’s for the best.” You said simply. Repeating the same words she told you before you left to the airport, leaving your heart in pieces and regret for not telling her how you feel. And while your feelings for her never left, you’re still not going to tell her, you won’t give her any chance to hurt you again, to break your heart, once was already enough. At that Melissa nodded and left.

And it seems the universe hates you as Melissa’s room was across the hall. You took a deep breath and continued getting ready before you went to go meet your new students.

You walked outside as students were lining up as they found who’s going to be their teacher this year. Someone called you over and told you to stand where they are so they know where to bring students that were going to be in your class. The universe had it out for you as you were told to stand 4 feet away from Melissa. You both did your best not to look at each other but every few seconds, one of you did.

At one point the sun hit you the exact same way it did when she first met you and the way it hit you again when she took you on a picnic to a beautiful park she knew. She thought you looked beautiful in the sun dress you wore, how it fit your body perfectly and your hair glowing in the sun. After you finished your meal you both layed down on the blanket and looked at the clouds in the sky and just enjoyed each other’s presence. And at one point you took her hand in yours and she turned to look at you, only to find you looking back at her with a smile. And she just layed there, looking into your eyes with a smile, the sun hitting your face, making you look like you’re glowing, like an angel.

It broke her heart that you wanted nothing to do with her now but she understood, she had basically told you that on that very sad day, when you said goodbye to each other, thinking it was for forever. Melissa was used to cutting people off, but it still hurt her when she did. Since you decided that you want the both of you to ignore each other, then that’s what she’s going to do. But she couldn’t stop a smile from forming when you were greeting some of your students with a huge smile.

Unknown to Melissa, Barb happened to look over at Melissa looking at you. She saw her looking at you with a sad smile and longing in her eyes. Barb heard your name being called and that’s when she put 2 and 2 together. Melissa told her about the woman she met on her vacation in Italy 5 years ago whose name was Y/N Y/L/N. And now here she was, the new teacher at Abbott. And from the look Melissa was giving you, Barb thought that seeing you again didn’t go well, since it seemed you were ignoring her. Barb decided that she’ll talk to Melissa at lunch.

The morning went by and Melissa kept looking across the hall to your classroom. She saw how you were with the kids and it warmed her heart. She saw how gentle you were, how you talked to them with a smile, and paid complete attention to them when they talked to you. She felt like she made a mistake letting you go 5 years ago but she thought that you would go and live your life and leave her behind in the end if you kept contact.

Lunch came and like always, Barb met Melissa in her classroom before they went to the break room together. But this time when Barb walked in, she closed the door after making sure it was only her and Melissa in the room.

Melissa heard the door close and saw Barb standing there giving her a look. “What?”

“So am I correct in assuming that the new 3rd grade teacher is the same one you met in Italy 5 years ago?” Barb said, straight to the point. And the sigh and look she gave was all the answer she needed.

“Ya, the same one.” Melissa said defeated.

“And I’m also guessing that meeting her again didn’t go well.”

“She said she wanted nothing to do with me. And used the exact same words I said to her 5 years ago when she asked me if I was sure I wanted to cut contact with her. That it’s for the best.” Melissa sighed and put her elbows on the desk and her head in her hands.

“Melissa…” Barb started but was interrupted by the redhead.

“I missed her Barb, I knew I did but after seeing her again, I realised how much I missed her. Even after 5 years I never forgot her. How is it that we spent only 2 months together and I still think about her 5 years later?��� Melissa said, and her voice cracked at the end. Barb could tell she was on the verge of crying.

“Even spending a short time with someone can leave an impact on you. It’s not always the amount of time together but the quality of the time you spend together.” Barb says and Melissa looks up at her , with red eyes. “Oh sweetheart.” Barb says and goes over and hugs her, and that’s when Melissa starts crying. Melissa never told her but Barb knew she developed feelings for the Italy girl. “Have you told her how you feel?” Barb asked after Melissa stopped crying.

“No. Why would I do that?” Melissa asks like the reason was obvious.

“Because maybe she feels the same and that’s why she’s avoiding you.” Barb says and Melissa freezes. She didn’t think about that. But as always Melissa declines it, deeming it impossible.

But the week goes by and Melissa can’t stop thinking about that. She thought about it more and more and the only thing she wanted was to be near you. But during the week, you did everything you could to avoid her. You never put anything in the fridge and you always come in with your own coffee so you never have to go in the break room in the morning. You avoid any possible eye contact when you’re both standing at the doorway, greeting your students. At lunchtime you eat in your classroom or in your car. At the end of the day you don’t look at her and you leave before Melissa does. And when you pass each other in the hall, you don’t even look her way. She sees you talking to other people though, you and Jacob seem to take a liking to each other as you guys have a lot of the same interests. She’s seen you talk to Barb at the beginning of the week but then you found out her and Barb were best friends so you haven’t talked to Barb since.

Before she knew it, one week goes by, then another, and another, and then it was Halloween morning and by some miracle, it was on a Friday this year. Melissa came in dressed as the scarlet witch and of course she saw you checking her out. You came dressed as Captain Marvel. Of course you both had to pick someone from the same universe. Melissa thought you looked amazing in the costume. It’s safe to say that while you were checking Melissa out, she was also checking you out.

And when hell broke loose and the teachers had to find baby thanos, you and her got paired together. While you were walking in the halls together, she kept looking at you. She wanted to talk to you and she had the perfect opportunity too, but she didn’t know how to start.

“Would you stop looking at me please.” You told her, well I guess you started it.

“Sorry, I want to talk to you though.” She said and you looked at her.

“That’s interesting, because 5 years ago you told me that we shouldn’t talk to each other again.” You countered.

“I made a mistake.” You looked at her a bit shocked. She certainly got your attention now. “I shouldn’t have suggested that we stop all contact. I regretted telling you that right away. I thought about looking for you, multiple times but I never did.”

“Why didn’t you? Why did you suggest cutting contact if you regretted it?” You asked her, and she dragged you into the nearest classroom and closed the door.

“Because I got scared Y/N. I got scared of how I felt about you. I didn’t just think of you as a friend, well I did at first but then I got feelings for you. And I knew that if we kept contact then eventually you’ll find someone else and live your life and leave me behind. I didn’t want you to hurt me when that happens so I decided that it would be best if we forget each other. But it backfired, because I never forgot you, I thought about you constantly.” Melissa said, and she got a bit choked up trying not to cry. “And then when we bumped into each other after 5 years, all I wanted was to reconnect with you and tell you how sorry I was for letting you go. But when I tried you wanted nothing to do with me and it broke my heart when you said that.” A tear fell down her cheek and her eyes were rimmed red.

You looked at her after her confession, whatever you thought she might have said that, that was not it. You didn’t know what to say, your brain processed everything she said. “You had feelings for me?” You said, and Melissa looked up into your eyes and saw that you looked hurt, the same look you had when you two said goodbye to each other.

“Have actually, I still have feelings for you, they never went away like I thought they would.” She confessed and you were shocked.

“I have feelings for you as well.” You confessed.

“You-you do?” She asked, not believing it to be true.

You nodded. “That’s why I thought it would be best if we stayed away from each other. It hurt when you told me that we shouldn’t speak to each other again. So when I saw you again, I was excited to see you again and then I remembered the pain from you leaving me behind so easily. I didn’t want to get hurt again. So I thought that I would spare myself the pain in the future and just not talk to you now. I regret not telling you how I felt then, but I thought you wouldn’t feel the same way because you’re…well… you know, you’re u. You’re so amazing and sweet and gorgeous, you could have anyone you want. You told her.

“Anyone except you, I could have anyone except the person I actually want.” She said with a tear rolling down her cheek. “If I told you 5 years ago how I felt then I could have had you, but I guess I missed my chance.”

“Who said that was your only chance?” You asked her and she looked at you confused. You walked up to her and wiped away the tear that’s rolling down her cheek. Her breath hitched when you did that, she wanted to get close to you again for almost 2 months now and to think it might happen, she just couldn’t think right now. She wants to respond, to make up for lost time, she doesn’t want to fuck it up and lose you again.

“Are you saying that you’re still willing to be with me?” She said and you nodded.

“I constantly thought about you as well, and you ended up in my dreams at night too. Almost like you were haunting me.” You joked and Melissa let out an airy chuckle. You touched your forehead with hers as you both basked in the happiness you felt of being near each other again.

“Y/N, I missed you so much, I regret ever letting you go.” You pulled back and cupped her cheeks.

“Then don’t let go now.” You told her and she wrapped her hands around your wrists while your hands were still cupping her cheeks.

“I won’t, I’m not going to make that mistake again.” And with that you leaned in and kissed her. She kissed you back almost immediately. You both felt safe , you felt at home. She moved her hands from your wrists and laid them on your waist. While you moved them from her cheeks to around her neck.

“Well it’s about time.” Barb said, smiling from the doorway, and you both backed away and looked at her. “I convinced everyone to pair you guys up so you would talk to each other and hopefully work it out, and looks like you do.” Barb said proudly and Melissa smiled.

“Thank you Barb.” Melissa said and then looked at you and pulled you to her and hugged you. She then pulled away and looked at your eyes. “I promise I won’t let you go.” She told you and you smiled at her.

And she said the same promise to you at the end of her vows on your wedding day.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta @imaginesmultifandoms

[lilcatdraws]

Exhaustion

Ledger!Joker x Reader

Warning: None - Fluff, sleepy J, no makeup

Summary: J comes home from work tired and covered in blood. You help him relax and get some rest.

Author's Note: I didn't think I was ever going to get this done. It took me so long to write something a little under 700 words. I should be ashamed 😭 Anyway as always, enjoy! I really liked writing this one. Thank you to @alittlesmartcookie and anon for suggesting this! 💜

J could barely keep his eyes open when he got home. You felt so sorry for him. He was dirty, sweaty, and covered in blood but he was far too tired to do anything about it.

As soon as he came into the bedroom, he fell face first into bed. You decided to take matters into your own hands so you went into the bathroom and drew a warm bath for J. 

You came back out to J who was still laying face down on the bed.

“J, honey, come in here. I have a bath ready. Let’s get you cleaned up.” You coaxed him.

J moaned. “Can’t. Too tired…” He mumbled.

“I know. I’ll help you.” 

J sighed and staggered into the bathroom. You helped him undress and get into the tub without falling. You grabbed a washcloth from the counter.

“Do you want your makeup off?” You asked.

J nodded wearily. You wetted the cloth and poured some soap onto it. J tilted his head back and closed his eyes as you gently washed the paint from his face.

Black streams ran down from around his eyes. The lipstick and white paint came off easily, revealing his gorgeous face and his pretty freckles that you love so much.

You moved to his hair next. His wild curls were tangled and bloody. The green dye was fading and this next wash would probably be enough to remove the rest of the dye.

You grabbed his shampoo and conditioner. You had bought it for him because it had coconut oil in it, which is perfect for curly hair and J’s curls were hard to manage.

You poured some of the shampoo in your hand and got to work lathering it into his hair. 

“Mmm, bunny, your hands feel good.” J murmured as you massaged his scalp. 

You filled a cup with some of the bathwater. Then you tilted his head back and rinsed his hair. Green rivers flowed down his back as the rest of the dye was washed out, revealing his natural brown.

You repeated the same steps with the conditioner and rinsed. Next, you carefully picked apart each tangle and ran your fingers through J’s hair.

You went on to J’s battered body. You washed it thoroughly but careful not to touch a wound or a bruise. The soap removed the blood and grime that clung to him. When you got to his back, you gave him a massage and traced your fingers along his many many scars. He tensed at first but quickly relaxed at your gentle touch. 

His back was a sensitive area. It had years and years of pain inflicted upon it. That was evident in the scars that were scattered across. Yet his back was strong. It had endured so much and continued to endure. J was tough as nails. Sometimes too much for his own good.

“Ahh. Thanks bunny. That spot’s been hurtin’ all day.”

“Glad I could help.” 

Once J was clean, you helped him stand up and get out of the tub. He dried off and you both walked back into the bedroom. J put on a black t-shirt and a pair of purple boxers. He crawled into bed and wrapped the comforter around himself. You dimmed the lights and joined him, resting your head on his warm chest.

“Do you feel better now?” You asked him softly.

“Yeah. Thanks, y/n.” J mumbled with a yawn.

He was getting sleepy and you were glad. Maybe he would sleep well for a change.

You stroked his damp hair and listened to him hum. He loved it when you played with his hair. A minute or two later, the purr like humming stopped.

You looked up. J was fast asleep. You smiled and nestled closer to him. His soft breathing was music to your ears. Soon you were fast asleep, curled up with your J.

[yjhariani]

hii, i've an idea. can you write something about the 141 team trying to fast for one day bc reader is also fasting and they're curious abt how it feels etc. thank you in advance :)

“I was thinking maybe we all try,” Soap said.

“Try what?” Ghost asked.

“Fasting,” Soap answered.

“Never once I thought such an idea would come out of you, Soap,” you chuckled.

“It’s not a bad idea either,” Ghost commented.

“I’m an amazing friend, how could you say that?” Soap protested. “Are we doing this or not?”

“Fuck yeah, I’m in,” Gaz nodded.

“When are we gonna do it?” Soap asked.

“Tomorrow sounds good,” Ghost said.

“Excuse me, tomorrow is cleaning day, my guys,” you pointed out.

“So, what? If you can do it, then, I can do it,” Ghost stated.

“Yeah, why not?” Soap supported. “You’re doing fine, we’ll do better than fine.”

“I already said I’m in,” Gaz shrugged.

“Fine,” you nodded. “I’ll wake you up for suhoor and you’ll eat and drink before dawn. After that you practise chastity, you can’t eat, drink, or smoke until dusk.”

There was a pause where everyone was looking at Ghost.

“I can survive without smoking,” Ghost said. “Been trying to quit anyway.”

“You said that like twelve times already in the span of one year,” you said.

“Still trying,” Ghost said.

Soon the time came. It was not that hard getting them out of the bed. However, getting them to wake up took a little bit more time and a lot of food.

The mess was not as full as how it would have been for breakfast, but still more people than it would have been any other month. Mostly, the people here were the ones who participated in Ramadan with their friends who were challenged to fast or simply curious to know what it felt like, maybe as a sign of respect to their friend.

It all went quite well, but after all it was only the beginning of the day.

Dawn came a few minutes after everyone was done eating and drinking. Everyone was oddly in a good mood. Maybe you were in a better mood than most of them because yesterday you did this all by yourself.

Then, fast forward to about hours later, it was about midday, and you were mopping the barrack floor with Ghost’ help. Gaz was asleep in the most uncomfortable position. Soap was nowhere to be seen, but Price did tell him to wash one of the cars.

“Hey, LT,” you called.

“Shut up,” Ghost said, more harshly than he intended.

“Okay,” you said as you turned around, hiding a smile—knowing that Ghost would be snapping at everyone soon if you kept pushing to talk to him.

Sometime later, you walked outside and found König holding up a hose downwards to Soap who was sitting underneath it, face up, eyes closed.

“Is he okay?” you mouthed at König.

König gave you a light shrug for an answer.

“Soap, are you okay?” you asked.

Soap opened his eyes and saw you.

“I’m,” Soap said, but he got water poured into his mouth and he moved his head off the water to talk to you, “I’m fucking thirsty.”

“Dude, you don’t have to force yourself. That’s literally part of the religion. I mean, that’s referring to sick people, pregnant and breastfeeding people, and elderly, but, really, you don’t have to force yourself,” you said.

“No,” Soap whined.

“Well, a lot of kids fast only up to midday,” you brought up.

“Why, because I’m a big baby?” Soap questioned.

You looked at König who slightly tilted his head in amusement.

“I’m just gonna leave you to it,” you decided.

About three hours before dusk, everyone was miserable. However, at least the cleaning was done. 

Everyone sort of had their own way of killing time. They had way less energy than usual, but still kept themselves busy.

Around the last hour of fasting, everyone was a little more spiritful again. They were excited about iftar and a lot of the conversation you were having was food related.

The four of you ordered a lot of food and plated everything in the common area of the barrack. There were warm drinks, cold drinks, savoury snacks, sweet snacks, portions of meals, but seemed to be lacking some water that no one realised would be necessary.

Hours came down to minutes before dusk. Everyone was sitting around the small coffee table where you put the food on. You put your phone on the table as well, waiting for it to announce the time to break your fast.

Your phone soon blared out as a sign that it was time to break your fast. Right away, the four men around you went to take their drinks and food and chugged everything in. However, they took a pause when they noticed that you only had one cup of warm beverage in your hands and you silently prayed before taking a sip. They slowed down then.

Regardless, after drinking a little bit of liquid and eating barely a few finger foods, everyone just sort of sat there and looked at each other.

“We’re never gonna be able to finish all these, are we?” Ghost questioned.

“Not even half,” you chuckled.

“This morning, I pissed seven times in the span of an hour because I drank three jugs of water,” Soap said, “and I’m still fuckin’ thirsty at noon.”

[mialikeshockey]

Adore You - Mark Estapa

Based on the song “Adore you” by Harry Styles :)

bowling date night with Mark and you can’t do anything but adore the man in front of you.

“You don’t have to say you love me, I just wanna tell you something. Lately you’ve been on my mind. Honey, I’d, I’d walk through fire for you. Just let me adore you. Like it’s the only thing I’ll ever do.”

You hear Mark come home after spending the day with the guys. Your puppy was barking like crazy while you could hear Mark saying hi to them.

He went to the lake with them while you and your friends went too but went home sooner. Mark stayed back to help everyone clean up.

Tonight was also date night. Almost every weekend was. No matter how late. It always happened no matter what.

“You ready, love?” Mark questioned walking into the room. “Almost…give me like five more minutes.” You say as you finish up washing your face. He smiles, while sitting down on the bed.

You and Mark went on dates almost every weekend. Either out to restaurants or just going to places like the bowling alley. The bowling alley was a personal favorite.

Seeing his face light up,as he smiles after making a strike. You couldn’t help but adore him. He was honestly the best boyfriend you can even remember having. He’s extremely sweet.

“All ready.” You take his hand, pressing a kiss into his fingers. While heading out the door Mark grabs his keys still not letting go of your hand.

The drive wasn’t to far. Mark mostly just talked about how we wanted to go to the beach again soon. He loves being out in the water. He sometimes reminds me of a man child. He gets so excited over the smallest things and it’s so adorable.

As we got to the bowling alley, we get our shoes and put our names into the board. Mark just put his as “stop sign” and you put yours “ts lover”. You and Mark always joked around with saying you were a puck bunny for him, even though you actually met Mark at a hockey game.

As the night continues, you and Mark were full of giggles and laughs. You loved nights like this. Practice and hockey free. Non of the team there. Just you and your favorite boy.

“LETS GO BABY!” Mark yells after making another strike. You giggle as he turns over all smiley. Mark sits down next to you and you put your head on his shoulder. “Wanna go get ice cream am after this?” He asks softly.

“Yeah, that sounds good.” You smiled. “We can finish this game up if you want, or we can go now. It’s up to you sweetheart.”

“We can go now if you want too.” You say turning to him. After you guys returned the shoes and got back to the car.

As the night went on it got pretty late. You and Mark were sitting outside of the ice cream shop. “The sky looks so pretty. All the stars…they are extremely bright.” You say while finishing your ice cream.

liked by markestapa, edwards.73, rutgermcgroarty, and others

yourusername i love you but maybe I love our puppy more 😁

markestapa the puppy ain’t even all that but I love you more THAN THE PUPPY. 🥲

^ edwards.73 aye don’t do my bud like that Estapa.

^ markestapa be•tray•al : the action of betraying one's country, a group, or a person; treachery. "the betrayal by the king by his daughter"

rutgermcgroarty why didn’t I get icecream.

^ luca.fantilli bro fr like??

^ mackie.samo we just ain’t cool enough man 🤧

^ markestapa why do u guys comment on all my gfs posts 😐

^ lhughes_06 bc she’s better than u?

^ markestapa bruh my own teammate.

^ edwards.73 dw bro ur still my bf

^ markestapa good 😍

^ yourusername damn. My bf js got taken 😪

——————————————————————

hi sorry ik my posts have been rlly bad lately I have had no motivation whatsoever and anything I come up with I don’t like and I hide in my drafts but Lunas over and when she’s over she forces her motivation on me 🥲 (not rlly she just talks about writing and than I think of something)

But anyways me and her are doing face masks rn and listening to music and it’s 4am 😍 alr bye bye ilyg

tagging some ppl - @lunaaaaaa-nothere @jeromes-scars

[lambertdiary]

Under The Influence

A/N: Hey! So this is was requested originally to @fluentmoviequoter: "Hii I'm utterly in love with your writing and I have a request for dalton ♡♡ basically he tries weed for the first time because he heard it help with sleeping sometimes. But he had too much and doesn't understand how he feels so he calls reader and is rambling on the phone then actually tells the reader he had weed and he wants company because he hates being alone. And then he just basically is like touch starved and is asking reader to play with his hair, hold him, play with his hands, and then he just ends up confessing his feeling for reader. If any of that makes sense 😘😘😘" unfortunately, they don't take this type of requests but when i read this i was absolutely obsessed with the idea so i knew i had to write it! i’ve never done weed so i’m sorry if this is not accurate. also i downloaded the entire movie just to get this gif, it was totally worth it. anyway pls let me know what you think!

Word count: 2.1+

Warnings: drug use, language

MASTERLIST  ✩  SEND ME A REQUEST

Dalton wasn’t the type to draw on drug use at all, but the sleepless nights were getting to him. The stress of school, his social life and the basics of keeping himself alive were enough, he didn’t wanna deal with constant weariness on top of all of that.

A few days prior, he overheard a few of his classmates talking about smoking weed before going to bed, they said it helped them relax or sleep better so as soon as he went back to his dorm he did a little research. Turns out they were right.

He couldn't stop thinking about it, especially at night when he couldn’t bring himself to fall asleep, not for a long period of time anyway. His problem was so bad he saw it as a success if he slept for two hours, so he knew he needed to consider his options. And right now, he was straight up curious to try a little pot.

He didn’t know how or where to get it, but he knew someone who did.

“Come on, Chris, just this one time” He begged, putting his hands together and giving her his best puppy eyes.

“Ugh, fine” She replied annoyed “But don’t be weird about it”

“I won’t, I promise” Dalton watched excitedly as Chris pulled out her phone and sent out a text.

“What are you gonna do anyway? Paint something on acid?”

“No, just sleep” He simply said.

Chris looked at Dalton again, visibly confused “What? That’s how you’re gonna waste it?”

“No, I’m not gonna waste it, I just heard it helps with sleep so I wanna give it a try” Dalton explained almost offended, scratching his neck nervously as Chris stared at him.

“Right” She replied slowly “Do you have a pipe or something to smoke with?”

Dalton’s eyes wandered around his room “No” He didn’t really think about the preparation process.

“Well, get one” She snapped “Or I guess I can lend you one of mine if I can get your stuff for tonight”

“Tonight?” He blurted out in surprise.

“Yeah, it’s not like you asked for world peace here, relax” She stood up and started to walk out of Dalton’s dorm “I’ll let you know later though, don’t miss me too much” She said before closing the door.

Dalton pulled out his laptop and started watching videos on how to use the smoking device and other basics on how to do it for the first time. It didn’t seem too crazy, definitely nothing special, it was for a reasonable purpose anyway.

The hours went by and he kept himself busy with school work, but that didn’t stop him from checking his phone every five minutes, hoping to see Chris’ name on the screen. Nothing yet, but maybe it was for the best.

It was now nighttime and as he got a hold of his phone, he was about to text his friend asking for an update, maybe he was still on time to cancel his unusual request, but before he could open their chat he heard the door swing open.

Dalton jumped and rolled his eyes “I thought we talked about using that key…”

“Hey! Be nice, I got you a present” She squeaked, pulling a little bag out of the pocket of her hoodie.

Dalton didn’t know how to react, he thought he was excited but now he was having doubts “I… thank- thank you” He stammered. 

“Are you okay? You don’t seem thrilled about the weed you practically begged for” Chris sat on the free bed across from Dalton.

“No, I am. I’m just a little nervous, I guess” He replied, brushing his feelings off with a chuckle. He took the bag from Chris’ hand and examined it.

“You'll be okay” She dropped a few more things on Dalton’s hands, a pipe and a lighter “Now, you are gonna need these, after grinding it-”

“I know how to do it” 

“Ooh… I’m impressed” Chris teased and Dalton rolled his eyes again “Well, I hope the tutorial you found is good cause I’m gonna need these back” Standing up, she walked towards the door “Now if you excuse me, I have a bag of my own that’s not gonna go to waste” She turned around to give Dalton one last look “Go crazy, but don’t be stupid”

“Thank you!” He yelled before Chris shut the door behind her.

He went back to the video and did exactly as the guy explained. After having the grounds ready he thought about the possible outcomes, but honestly getting a full night of sleep didn’t sound so bad. Unsure on how much he should smoke, he poured the contents of the bag and packed the pipe, carefully so as to not drop anything. He held it for a moment, debating whether or not he should actually do it.

‘Fuck it’ He though to himself before grabbing the pink lighter.

He brought the pipe up to his lips and applied the flame to the end of the bowl, inhaling like in the video. He coughed after the first time, but he kept doing it, the coughs decreasing with each puff. He did it one last time and he felt… nothing, really. Was he doing it wrong? Was he scammed? He decided to give it another puff just to make sure. Still nothing.

Defeated, he dropped everything on his desk and proceeded with his bedtime routine. Grabbing his essentials for a shower, he stepped out of his room and into the communal showers. He wanted to take his time but the lack of privacy made it impossible for him to relax, so he quickly did his thing and after he was done, he wrapped a towel around his waist and stared at himself in the mirror. Did he always feel this nauseous after a shower?

“Hey, how is it going?” Some random dude greeted him as he entered the room.

‘Oh no, does he know I just smoked something?’ Without saying a word, he swiftly walked back to his dorm, feeling the judgy eyes on him. Opening the door he noticed the smell of his room, it was so strong he was worried the entire building knew about this. He opened a window to ventilate the space but when a random headache hit him, he closed it again. He laid on his back and stared at the ceiling, feeling anxious. What if this was his last day on earth and he was just alone in his room? 

Dalton: Hey, are you up?

Dalton texted one of his friends, Y/N. If there was someone he needed to see before dying it was her. He kept his eyes on his screen as he waited for a reply. After a minute of not getting one he grew impatient and hit the call button instead.

“Hello?”

“Did I wake you?”

“No, don't worry, I’m doing some last minute homework, you know how it is” Y/N chuckled, putting her pen down for a moment.

“Right” Dalton replied in a whisper.

“Why? What’s up?” Y/N stood up and stretched her legs, she had been sitting there for a while and her body was aching.

“I… have a situation”

“Is everything ok?” She sounded a little worried.

“I’m okay…” He stopped for a moment, not sure if he wanted her to know what he had done, honestly he just wanted to see her.

“What is it then?” She insisted.

“Promise me you won't laugh” Dalton sat up and he felt himself get dizzy again. 

“Dalton, just tell me”

“I had a little bit of weed” He finally admitted.

“What?” Y/N was in pure shock, she never thought of Dalton as a stoner.

“It's not what you think, I heard it helps with sleeping and you know my situation, uh- when it comes to that so-”

“So you had weed on a school night?” She interrupted him.

“Y/N-” 

“Sorry, uh- are you okay?” She tried to be supportive but it was hard when she had so many questions.

“Come over”

“Right now?”

“Please”

“Um- I don't know…” She hesitated looking back at her unfinished homework.

“What if I die tonight? You would feel really guilty you didn’t come over” Dalton heard Y/N sigh on the other line and he knew for a fact she was rolling her eyes.

After a moment of silence, Y/N finally agreed “Fine, but don’t die” She hung up and grabbed a few things before leaving her dorm. It was a really short walk and she didn’t think she would stay there for too long. 

When Dalton heard the confirmation from Y/N, he quickly stood up and looked through his drawers, trying to find something to wear. He was feeling hot (even though he just took a cold shower) so he decided on a tank top and shorts. His head was still spinning and unfortunately lost his balance as he finished getting dressed, but immediately got back on his feet when he heard the door.

Knocking a couple of times, she heard the loud thud coming from inside, followed by steps getting closer to the door.

“Thank you for coming” Dalton said as he opened the door.

“Are you ok-” She was interrupted by Dalton’s embrace “Oh”

They closed the door after fully entering the dorm and Y/N took Dalton’s hand, dragging him across the room to make him sit on the bed “Jesus dude, open a fucking window, I could smell this from the entrance” She joked as she struggled to open it.

“You could?” Dalton’s eyes widened and Y/N suppressed a grin, something in the softness of his voice made her heart skip a beat, completely oblivious to her own feelings. 

“How much did you have?” She then examined his desk, looking at the empty bag and the mess of burned grounds around the pipe.

“Like, the whole thing”

Y/N turned her head to look at him again “You’re kidding”

“What?” He anxiously asked.

“Dalton, you smoked this entire bag?”

“Was I not supposed to?”

“Dude-”

“Chris didn’t say anything about how much I should have so-”

“Chris gave you the weed?”

“Well… yeah, but I asked for it”

“And I take it you’ve never done this before” Dalton shook his head slowly, reaching for Y/N and taking her hand forcing her get closer, he opened his legs so that Y/N could comfortably stand between them, and as Dalton embraced her again, Y/N’s hands went to his wet hair and started brushing it with her fingers.

“I’m not feeling very good” He whispered against her.

“Yeah, I bet” She then grabbed Dalton’s head and made him look up at her, keeping her hands on the sides of his head “But you’re not gonna die, this is gonna wear off, you just have to give it time”

“Alright” Y/N chuckled at how Dalton looked like a lost puppy “I wanna lay down”

Y/N climbed on Dalton’s bed and positioned her back against the wall, helping Dalton get comfortable as he softly collapsed on her lap “So, who told you to try weed before bed?”

“No one, I heard some kids talking about it in class” He explained, closing his eyes “I didn’t want this to happen, I just- I wanted to actually sleep through the night and not feel like I was a walking corpse the next day… Well, now I would prefer that, weed does NOT make me feel relaxed at all”

Y/N smiled again. She never would’ve thought someone’s rambling could be so… endearing “I can see that, next time try to take it slow”

“Nuh uh, I’m never doing this again” He stated, using a firm tone.

Her eyes looked down at him with affection, stroking his soft hair as he rested his own eyes. And despite what he just said, he looked peaceful for the first time in a while.

“Y/N” He said softly, blinking his blue eyes open and looking at her. Whatever kind of effect he was on at that moment, he knew for sure it wasn’t from the weed.

“Mhm” Y/N hummed, smiling down at him.

“Y/N” He repeated, slower. He lifted his hand and it landed on her cheek, bringing his thumb up and down as he brushed her soft skin. She panicked as she realized what he was about to do.

He opened his mouth again, but before he could say anything Y/N quickly stopped him “If you’re going to confess something, I would very much prefer you didn’t do it under the influence of weed”

His face turned red and he closed his eyes to try to hide the embarrassment “As you wish”

[littlethingsinlife]

i'm sorry (happier part 2)

A/N: I was not expecting the amount of positive feedback for the first part and I was even more surprised to see people asking for a part 2! It was originally created to be a one-shot but a part 2 really fit well with how the first one ended. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you again for all of the love and support! I hope you all enjoy. I also want to thank my friend, @tummymoth, they really helped me flush out and refine my rusty ass writing (also let me word vomit at them till midnight sometimes).

Pairing(s): Past Lo’ak x Omatikayan!Reader, Ao’nung x Omatikayan!Reader, Slight mentions of Lo’ak x Tsireya

Warnings: Lo'ak's POV, Swearing, Ao'nung saying something sus ONE time

More Info: My vision for this part 2 was to create a reply in Lo'ak's pov. So we'll have a look at what he experienced and thought process (not too sure if any of that made sense) but I was inspired by Joshua Bassett's song "i'm sorry" and it played constantly as I wrote this. Hopefully I was able to do right by my idea haha.

Summary: 7,547

Part 1: Happier

Key:

(Y/N) = Your Name 

Lyrics = Bolded Italics 

Flashbacks = Italics

Na'vi Words:

Yuey - beautiful (refers to a person) 

Skxawng - idiot/moron

Marui - Pods where the Na’vi live

Ilu - sea creature similar to dolphins

Ikran - dragon-like creature 

Tulkun - sentient creatures similar to whales

Olo’eyktan - clan leader/ chief

I thought about what I would say

But I’m two years too late

I can’t imagine how you’re doing these days, hmm

Sure, it wasn’t perfect back then

I’ll be first to admit

But it was better than being strangers again, oh

It had been a couple of months since my interactions with (Y/N) dwindled to terse smiles and barely audible greetings. If you asked me to point out the moment our friendship started to change, I couldn’t tell you. When did our bond start to break? When did it even start to crack? We used to talk every day about all the things we did and planned what pranks to pull on everyone, but now? Now, she barely looked in my direction. Now, she wouldn’t even give me the time of day. 

I couldn’t remember when it started, but I knew that it was somehow my fault I grew distant once we arrived in Awa'atlu. I guess I was just so fascinated by the new environment and people, I didn’t even realize a rift started to form between us in the first place, much less that it started to grow. 

The night before we left to find a new home, I held (Y/N) as she let out sobs filled with fear and anxiety. It broke my heart, but all I could do was hold her and let her cry until she was calm enough to tell me what was on her mind. 

“I-I am afraid, what if the sky people come to find us again? I cannot lose any of you; it would break me into a million pieces,” she sobbed. 

“If they find us then we will fight and we will win,” I reassured her, gently rocking her back and forth. 

“You are an idiot, I was so close to losing you, to losing Kiri, Tuk, how do you think it would make me feel to lose the most important people in my life?” she sniffled. My chest ached at how broken she sounded, but the only thing I could do was assure her and offer her more words of comfort as I held her in my arms. 

“I promise that I will be with you throughout the journey as will my family. We love you, and even if you do not believe it, you are a Sully. And you know what my dad always says.” 

“Sullys stick together,” we chorused.

That night, I cradled her in my arms until she fell asleep. 

Fuck, I completely broke my promise to her, how could I forget? Shaking my head, I tried to reason to myself, “Maybe she just needs time alone. I’m sure she’ll come running back soon once she realizes that it's no fun without me, her best friend.” I felt a small, unfamiliar feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Right?” 

I’m drunk too late talking to the moon

Writing songs I can’t sing to you, ‘cause

“Bah! Stop lying, I know you (Y/N). You would have fought alongside me and defended Kiri. You are not the same girl I knew in the forest back home,” I muttered, rolling my eyes and getting up to leave. Honestly, who did she think she was fooling? The skxawng had the balls to insult Kiri, and all she did was sit back and watch. She didn’t even make a move to help until it was to help him by pulling me off. “Talk to me when you’ve come back to your senses,” I called over my shoulder, refusing to look back. 

“Lo’ak! Bro—” a hand roughly grabbed my shoulder, jolting me out of my daze, “why’re you just staring off like that?” I whipped my head to see who the hell it was that was bothering me, only to be met with Neteyam.

“Did you have to grab me that hard?” I hissed before my initial anger gave way to a heavy feeling. “It's nothing, just—just lost in thought” I sighed, shrugging his hand off my shoulder. 

“Right, sure, nothing.” he crouched down beside me. “Don’t think you can lie to me lil bro, you’ve been spacing out more than you usually do. I didn’t even think it was possible to be more empty-headed than you already are,” he stated. 

“Wha—no I haven’t,” I tried to argue, but of course, he wasn’t convinced. 

“Can you stop arguing with me for once and just tell me what’s going on with you, you skxawng?” 

I scrunched my nose in distaste and inhaled sharply, “(Y/N) and I have been…  distant,” I admitted, turning to look at him. “She won’t even look at me. She either only answers me with one word or doesn’t answer at all.” 

He nodded, motioning for me to continue. 

“I—the last time we talked, I said things I didn’t mean. Things that just came out because I was so frustrated and… and angry. It was the heat of the moment and I—” 

“What did you say skxawng, did you hurt her?” Neteyam interrupted, face twisting to show the beginnings of distaste.

“No, no—” I sputtered and raised my hands to calm him before he could go on an hour-long lecture that I absolutely was not in the mood to hear. “At least I don’t think I did… I just wanted to ask her why the hell she was helping fish lips, that’s all—” 

“You didn’t answer me Lo’ak, what did you say to (Y/N)? I don’t care why you did it, I want to know what you said to elicit such a reaction from her.” By Eywa, if he would just give me a chance to get to the point—

“I—I told her that she was not the same girl that I knew back in the forest..." my ears lowered as the weight of what I said slowly sunk in. “And that she could talk to me once she came back to her senses,” I whispered, internally cringing at my harsh words.. 

“You fucking skxawng—” 

“Can you stop calling me that? I already know, you don’t need to keep repeating it…” I scoffed, looking out into the ocean. I’m good enough at beating myself up over the hundreds of times I’ve messed up in this lifetime, I didn’t need another disappointed set of eyes on me.

My ears twitched at the deep sigh he let out. “Look, I’m sorry that I keep calling you skxawng but that is exactly what you are for saying something so hurtful to your best friend of all people. The two of you were inseparable the moment you were born. Even if you don’t want to, suck up your dumbass pride,” my ears flattened again. It wasn’t pride, I’m not prideful. It—it was me needing (Y/N) on my side. We used to always be on the same page, and when she said I was wrong for wanting to defend Kiri against those assholes, it felt like she was siding with them instead of me, and—

Okay, so maybe it was pride.

  “Admit that you were wrong, and go talk to (Y/N),” Neteyam insisted as he put a reassuring arm around my shoulders, jostling me around to prove a point. “Your friendship is so much stronger and Eywa knows that a heat-of-the-moment argument isn’t going to break that. You should have more faith in her.” His gaze sharpened before he schooled his expression into something calmer. “Just talk to her, yeah?” 

“...Yeah,” I mumbled, swallowing down whatever argument was trying to bubble up from my throat and prying his arm off me. “You’re right. I’ll just clear things up with her and apologize. Everything will go back to normal after that, thanks bro—for listening,” I agreed. 

Ever since that day

The things I didn’t say They haunt me, oh

And I know that I’m to blame 

So, go ahead and 

Blame it on me, oh

Our lessons on the ways of the Metkayina were finished, so it was rare for the entire group to be in the same place. But every once in a while, we all finished our chores at the same time and found ourselves near the shore where we first learned to ride the ilu, and sat around a fire hours before eclipse, laughing and exchanging stories. 

The rarity of these moments made me cherish them that much more, but two people continued to miss our not-so-scheduled gatherings the past two moon cycles. How was it possible that they were the only two to keep missing our hangouts? Were they together? Fish lips had better not be doing anything to (Y/N) or so hel—

“(Y/N)! Ao’nung! You guys made it!” Rotxo laughed. 

“Yeah, yeah, quit shouting will you?” Ao’nung shot back as he sat down next to Rotxo, (Y/N) smiling softly as she followed. 

“So, what’ve you guys been up to? We haven’t seen you in what feels like ten moon cycles.” Neteyam questioned.

“Teyam, you saw me earlier today, you literally helped me feed our ikran,” (Y/N) joked. ‘Teyam? When did she start calling him by anything other than his given name?

Ao’nung swatted her side with his stupidly wide tail and swung an arm around her shoulder with a remarkably punchable smile on his face “More like he was trying to make sure you didn’t accidentally give them your fingers for breakfast. They would’ve gotten indigestion.”

“Haha very funny Ao’nung,” she drawled, “I would’ve fed you to Tekay instead, but she would’ve gagged the moment she caught a whiff of you,” she scoffed as she quickly pushed him away by the chest.

“Wait… Do they even have a gag reflex?” Fish lips didn’t budge, he just had a dumb look of confusion on his face.

“No, but they would defy the laws of biology to gag just for you,” she quipped, sticking out her tongue and moving to push him away again, but the skxawng had the nerve to pull her into a headlock. 

“Oh, yuey, the ikran won’t be the only ones gagging on me tonight,” he argued with a smirk. 

Did I want to punch that smirk off his face? Did I want to gag? Both? Before I could make a decision, (Y/N) grimaced, pushing him away again and smacking him upside the head. 

“That’s actually repulsive. You’re disgusting.”

“Dude, keep it in your pants, her family is right there,” Rotxo laughed, doubled over as he struggled to catch his breath.

“Yeah, we’re right here,” I interjected with a smile—wanting to join in on the jokes that were being thrown around—but it was hard to keep my face from falling when I saw (Y/N)’s bright expression falter. 

“Anyway, what were you guys talking about before Ao’nung and I arrived?” she asked in a too-bright tone of voice she only used when she desperately wanted to change the subject. As if everyone came to an unspoken agreement to forget about the conversation before, one by one they all started talking about who they thought would win in a fight—Toruk Makto, or our Olo’eyktan, Tonowari. 

The sound of laughter and excited chatter faded as I replayed the previous conversation in my head. When did they start joking around like that? Why the hell did fish lips call her yuey like it was the most natural thing in the world? How come she smiled so easily with him but faltered when she sees me? She was probably smiling with him right now—

I looked over at her, a pit in my stomach already forming at the idea of her smiling at him, but she looked so distant, so withdrawn from everything around her. Before I could even blink, she put a delicate hand on Ao’nung’s arm to grab his attention and mumbled something in a hushed tone. After a few beats of silent conversation, Ao’nung nodded and gave her a look of understanding. 

Why did he look at her like that? How much time did they spend together to be able to understand each other with just a look? How much time have I wasted breaking my promise to her while she grew closer to someone else? 

 Standing up, I made up my mind that I would talk to her and clear up any miscommunication. There was no way in hell I was about to let fish lips ruin our childhood friendship. Before I could even get close, Neteyam pulled me aside. 

“Bro, why’re you glaring at everyone?” he asked with concern written all over his face.

“Glaring?” I tilted my head in confusion. “I’m not glaring, this is just my face.” 

“No, no.” He shook his head. “I’m your brother, I know your face. Whatever look you’ve been throwing at Ao’nung and (Y/N)? You may as well have been throwing knives at them.”

Behind Neteyam, I could see (Y/N) get up to bid everyone good night and slowly walk in our direction. This was my chance, I just needed this overbearing idiot to leave me alone. 

“Whatever look you think I’m giving to them, you’re wrong,” I denied. “Can you not act like this right now?” My tail flicked side to side impatiently, an obvious twinge of annoyance clear in my tone. I licked my lips nervously as I could hear footsteps coming closer. Leaning slightly to the side, I looked behind Neteyam to see (Y/N) and—

Ao’nung? What? Why is he there? 

“Good night,” (Y/N) muttered, not sparing us a glance as she walked past. I followed her every move and—as if everything slowed down—my eyes narrowed as they found Ao’nung’s hand placed on her lower back, leading her gently in the direction of the marui. 

I know that I’m too late

But I’ll say it anyway

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry 

Though it's far too late

“I did it! Did you see that Reya?” I shouted—out of breath—as I showed off the shell Tsireya threw. 

“Yes, yes you did it!” She exclaimed, excitedly wrapping her hand around mine. For someone who spent so much time underwater, her hand radiated so much warmth. So easy to hold. My heart swelled with pride as she continued to compliment me. “You’ve improved so much!”

“Yeah? Well, I had a great teacher,” I joked, nudging her softly with my shoulder. It wasn’t just her hands that were warm either, she just seemed to radiate it.

“Oh stop, you flatter me too much,” she denied, fidgeting with her hair. Was that a blush on her face? “C’mon, why don’t we catch up with the others? Private lessons are officially done for the day,” she announced as she led me to shore. Oh Eywa, she looked so pretty like this, with her hair flowing down her back and the way her eyes cast down when she became flustered. And her smile, it was a smile that could knock the air out of my lungs.

While we walked onto shore, we joked around and laughed with each other, talking about anything and everything. The ease of each reply and joke came as smoothly as gliding through the water on an ilu—as easy as breathing. Laughing at another one of Tsireya’s jokes, my eyes scanned the village as we approached it. Families were winding down for the day as they cooked dinner, although I didn’t see mine anywhere nearby aside from Kiri. 

My smile slowly dropped when I was able to make out Kiri looking frantically around as if she was searching for someone. Tsireya and I made our way to her, worry filling the pit in my stomach. As we got closer, I could see Ao’nung climb down one of the roots of the Mangrove trees and make a beeline toward her. My eyes stayed on both of them, making sure that fish lips didn’t do anything to Kiri. 

Ears twitching I was able to make out the words, “(Y/N)? Did you find her? ” from Kiri as they were carried on the wind toward us.

“Yeah I did, I was able to get her to eat, but she’s not looking too good,” Ao’nung replied with concern lacing his voice.

Brows furrowing, I pulled Ao’nung by the shoulder. “What do you mean she’s not looking good? Where is she? What did you do?” 

“What the hell do you mean? I didn’t do shit, freak.” I rolled my eyes at the insult. He couldn’t use that thick head of his to think of anything else to call me? From the pained look on his face, I could tell that my grip on his shoulder had too much pressure. Good. Served him right.

Before Ao’nung and I could continue our argument Kiri groaned, “Will the both of you skxawng shut up! I’ll go talk to her.” My eyes followed her retreating form as she went to talk to (Y/N)—tail lashing back and forth in agitation all the while—before turning back to Ao’nung.

Who the hell did he think he was? I’d beat his skxawng ass if he hurt (Y/N) in any way. He had no right to look so damn worried. They weren’t even close. What even happened? How long had she been missing for Kiri to go to fish lips of all people for help? Should I follow Kiri? Why didn’t (Y/N) come to me? She always came to me, and if she came to me now, I absolutely would have listened. Why—

“Lo’ak? Hey, are you okay? Lo’ak?” a hand softly placed itself on my arm. Closing my eyes in frustration, I sighed. 

“Yeah, perfectly fine.” 

Damn it, was that when it started? How idiotic and blind have I been that I didn’t even notice that her trust in me started to slip and die when it was right in front of me? Why didn’t I go to her and make sure she was okay? I should’ve punched that idiot’s lights out—

“Ao’nung! Stop pulling me you skxawng, you’re walking too fast, slow down!” a hushed voice chastised. 

“C’mon yuey, we only have about an hour before eclipse, we have to hurry!” His voice grated against my ears as he responded. 

“That’s plenty of time!” (Y/N) insisted. I could hear the laughter bubbling up in her voice as she chased after him. “Please Ao’nung slow down, I can’t keep up.” 

“It can’t be helped, you’re so short—” a whack could be heard. “Ow!”

“I’m as tall as Tsireya, you giant!” 

“Both you and my sister are short—Ow! Alright, just because you did that, you leave me no choice,” Ao’nung said, throwing (Y/N) over his shoulder with a laugh. 

The bickering voices got closer, and my eyes narrowed at the way he held her. My breath hitched as he whispered something in her ear that made her ears perk up and her eyes widen. What the hell was he saying to her? Before I could spring up from my spot, Ao’nung tossed (Y/N) in the water, her yelp quickly interrupted by the sound of her body hitting the water. 

I stayed in my spot as shock zipped through my body. Letting out a breath I didn’t know I held, her head popped out of the water, a playful glare on her face. 

“I told you, you left me no choice,” he stated, guffawing at her expression.

“Oh yeah?” she groused, spitting out seawater as she wrung out her hair. “Well fuck you too. Help me out of here?” 

“Only if you say the magic word,” he taunted, crossing his arms with a smirk. “Otherwise, I’m afraid my hands are tied.”

“Please, oh great son of our Olo’eyktan, help me out of the ocean,” she beckoned dramatically, sarcasm dripping from every word while she rolled her eyes. “It’s about time you recognized my proud lineage, forest dweller,”  he said as his chest puffed out with a hand reaching towards (Y/N). And there was that stupid smile on his face.

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, a mischievous smile spreading across her face as she reached for his hand, making sure to tug with enough force to unceremoniously yank him into the water. 

“So much for the son of a great warrior! Your instincts are shit!”

“My instincts are dull you say?” he questioned as his head popped up next to her. “We’ll see about that!” 

“Wha—AHHH—'' she wheezed. “No, please Ao’nung stop! That tickles!” Her arms flailed wildly in an attempt to free herself from his grasp. 

What the fuck.

  My ears flattened at an angle as I tried to process the scene unfolding before me. When did she start laughing with him? That should’ve been me she was laughing with. Not him, not the skxawng who had been nothing but rude to us since we arrived. What… what was I even saying—Fuck I didn’t know anymore. Why did I feel like this every time I saw them together… laughing and making jokes like we used to?

And it was me, it wasn’t you

It’s cliche, but it’s true 

I wasn’t thinking how I usually do, oh

And is your momma doing well? 

Or does she still hate me? 

But it was hard to watch me put you through hell 

I’m drunk, too late, talking to the moon, ooh

Writing songs I can’t sing to you, ‘cause 

Two weeks had passed since I started noticing the changes in (Y/N)’s relationship—friendship?—with Ao’nung. It was like every time I blinked, I could see her laughing loudly as Ao’nung tickled her with a triumphant smile on his stupid face. Since that day, I had been trying to find a way to talk to (Y/N), but she was never alone. She was always with him and when she wasn’t, she disappeared and I couldn’t find her no matter how hard I looked. 

Now here I was, wandering around trying to look for her as I rehearsed what I wanted to tell her. 

Where could she be? Dinner was in an hour and she wasn’t anywhere near our marui. I had to find her soon so there would be enough time for us to talk. I had to tell her that I miss her, that I was sorry for being so dumb, that I shouldn’t have let my pride blind me, and that I didn’t mean any of the things I said. 

There was only one place I hadn’t looked yet… hopefully she was there. 

As I was getting closer to the root Kiri stalked to, I could see two silhouettes beside each other. An all-too-familiar feeling bloomed in my chest once I registered that she was there with him. 

Her melodic laughter made my steps falter. I clenched my fists tightly, contemplating if I should go over there and pull her away, force her to talk to me, to listen. But I couldn’t, I couldn’t do that to her, not when she looked so content, so happy. 

Ever since that day 

The things I didn’t say 

They haunt me, oh

I know that I’m to blame 

So, go ahead and 

Blame it on me, oh

“Lo’ak? You said you were going to look for (Y/N) and never came back. She’s already in the marui helping mom cook,” Kiri stated, a twinge of annoyance lacing her voice. “Hey, are you listening?” She shook my arm slightly, making me jump out of my stupor. 

“Yeah, sorry, you said dinner was ready?” I asked as I stared off. 

The sand beside me crunched softly as Kiri made a move to sit beside me. “No, I said that (Y/N) is with mom helping her cook. Where is your head at?” she asked as she tilted her head to try and meet my gaze. “Are you alright?” The annoyance in her voice shifted to concern. 

“I’m fine, yep—just… fine,” I brushed her off, hoisting myself up to head towards Mom and Dad for dinner before Kiri yanked me back down. 

“Lo’ak, don’t pretend you’re okay when you’re not. Tell me what’s going on,” she urged. “Maybe I can help you with whatever it is that’s occupied your mind lately.”

I inhaled sharply, debating if I should tell her what had been muddying my mind, the reason why I had been so spaced out, why I had been glaring daggers at fish lips each time I saw his stupid face next to (Y/N)—how confused I was. 

“Stop with the thinking skxawng, you might hurt yourself,” she admonished. “Just tell me. It’s not like I can’t handle it.” 

Huffing, I rolled my eyes and turned away from her to look at the sea. I hadn't even said anything yet and Kiri was already making me feel idiotic. How was I supposed to tell her what's been going on like this? Maybe if I kept quiet for long enough, she would get tired of waiting for me to start talking and go on to eat dinner without me. 

A couple of minutes of silence passed. 

I could still feel her staring at me.

“I’ve—I’ve been conflicted,” I started, tongue feeling heavy in my mouth as I continued to stare at the shoreline. “I don’t know what I’m feeling.”

“What do you mean?” Kiri nudged my shoulder with hers. “Elaborate a little more, I can’t help if you don’t tell me the reason why you’re feeling confused.” 

“...Whenever I see (Y/N) with Ao’nung, it’s as if I can feel my heart aching,” I said, motioning toward my chest to prove my point. “There’s always a… a surge of anger that rushes through me. All I want to do is pull her away from him so then everything can go back to the way things used to be—for us to be okay.”

“Lo’ak…” If I was looking at her, I’d probably see Kiri tilt her head with sympathy. But sympathy isn’t what I needed right now.

“I want her to look at me and smile, to laugh with me, hug me—but now, whenever I get close to her, she’s next to him, laughing with him, cracking the jokes we would make to each other… I just—” I rubbed at my face in frustration. It wasn’t as if the words were hard to come by—I had spent so much time bottling them up that it was hard to stop talking. No, I just hated the fact that I felt this way in the first place. “I don’t understand why seeing them makes me feel like my heart is about to explode—why it makes me want to scream. It hurts.” 

“Lo’ak” she put a hand on my shoulder. “Are you—are you in love with (Y/N)?”

Love?

I sputtered in surprise and whipped my head toward Kiri to see if she was joking or not. What kind of a sick question was that? I wasn’t in the mood for any games. 

“What? No, she’s like my… sister?”

She rolled her eyes and sighed. “If you’re not, then why does seeing her with Ao’nung hurt you so much? Why do you care as much as you do?” 

“I shouldn’t!” I wrenched my shoulder away from her hand and stood up. The need to move around and do something—anything—was too much. There was too much energy thrumming right beneath my skin to sit still anymore. 

“That’s the problem! After everything I said to her, done to her? I don’t have the right to say I’m in love with her. She’s my childhood friend, Kiri. That’s all our relationship has ever been… I just—” I paused in thought and tried to calm down. “I didn’t realize seeing her have so much fun with someone else would make me feel so, so hollow—” 

“Let me ask you something, you have to promise to be completely honest with me, okay?”

I nodded, not even looking in her direction. 

“When (Y/N) tried to pull you off from Ao’nung that one fight months ago, what did you feel? Angry? Betrayed? Jealous?”

Jealous? Did she really think I was sulking for months because of such a petty feeling? I’m not a jealous person. I never have been. 

“Seeing her jump in to get me off him made me feel like she was siding with him and telling me that I was wrong. Her actions were clear as day to me, Kiri.” I started to pace around. “She was protecting him—caring for him when she should’ve been next to me, helping and supporting me. When she did that—I felt like the only person that’s ever been on my side—” I croaked and turned my head to look at Kiri as tears stung my eyes “The only person who didn’t see everything I did as some sort of disappointment or failure, abandoned me and chose someone else.”

“...”

“I know that I could’ve approached her a different way but how could I when I felt so broken?” I inhaled sharply, eyebrows furrowed. “ It’s all fish lips’ fault. If he wasn’t such an asshole, none of this would have happened, and (Y/N) and I would still be the same, she would still be by my side—supporting me, loving me.” 

“Why do you keep blaming it on Ao’nung?”

“Because it is his fault that things have turned out the way it has.” I threw my hands up, exasperated. What wasn’t Kiri getting? “He’s getting in between my relationship—er—friendship with (Y/N)! If he wasn’t there I would be able to talk to her and tell her I’m sorry, but she’s always with him—”

“Stop! Are you hearing yourself?” She nudged at my foot to interrupt and scoffed. “You’re unbelievable, you know that? (Y/N) told me what you said to her, how ‘she wasn’t the same girl’ you knew back in the forest. Do you know what happened when you told her that? Do you know how much pain she was in?”

Pain? I snorted, turning towards Kiri. “Now I know what you’re saying is bullshit. You know how (Y/N) is—if she really was pissed at me she would’ve come to me instead of running to someone else.”

“She wasn’t pissed. She cried because of you, Lo’ak. Because of what you said.” I stopped dead in my tracks to look at her. Kiri's eyes didn’t waver. Another heavy feeling settled on my chest and clawed its way up my throat. If you had asked me what it was, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you. Was I sad? Guilty? Angry? Was I jealous like she said?

I settled on anger.

“If you’re saying what I think you’re saying—”

“The person that found her that night, the one who comforted her? That was Ao’nung. He held her in his arms as she sobbed when I found them.” She stood up too, forcing me to stop pacing. 

“The last thing I want to hear about right now is him, Kiri. What the fuck—”

“Did you ever think about why she’s so comfortable with him now? Why they’re so close? While you ignored her for weeks, he made sure she was okay—made sure she ate every day. He didn’t leave her side until she finished,” Kiri pointed out, and before I could even think to open my mouth to remind her how shitty he was to her especially, she cut me off. “Yes, he was an asshole at the beginning, and yes he has a screwed-up way to show he cares, but he stepped up when you fucked up.” She poked my chest with a glare before she continued. 

“Oh, so I’m a fuck-up now?” I asked wryly. 

“You can’t put all the blame on someone that took care of your best friend. Stop being so blinded by your pride and hatred and see that you’re the real reason why your relationship with (Y/N) isn’t the same as it used to be.” 

My heart sank a little more as I scrambled for something to say. “How could you say that—”

“No, you do not get to interrupt me right now, Lo’ak.” Her eyes flashed with something closer to anger than annoyance. When was the last time I saw her angry? “Listen and listen well. When we couldn’t find (Y/N) and we were looking for her everywhere—he was the one that found her spot, the one she isolated herself to so she could cry alone, and no one would see how much pain she was in. And what were you doing in the meantime?” 

My ears flattened at her rising tone, and I was finally beginning to understand the weight stuck in my throat and chest. Not anger, not even jealousy.

“You were out there with Tsireya, stuck in your own little world.”

It was my fault.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy that you found her but you can’t have both of them. You can’t be that selfish. From (Y/N)’s perspective, you’ve already chosen the one you want.”

“It’s not like I’ve actually chosen anyone yet,” I tried to interject, but all the fight had left my voice as Kiri’s words dug into my skin and sunk in.

“Don’t you dare play with either of their feelings. (Y/N) held so much love for you in her heart, she allowed herself to break to the point of no repair because she didn’t want to show you how much it hurt her to see you at your happiest with Tsireya.” She paused before continuing, her voice losing its edge. “Let her move on, brother. And if it’s Ao’nung that makes her light up the way she used to, then you suck it up and let him. He was there when your pride wouldn’t even let you apologize or even look in her direction. Actually think about how she feels for once.” 

I hated the fact that there wasn’t anything I could say to prove her wrong. 

“It’s all I’ve been thinking about nowadays,” I muttered.

I know that I’m too late

But I’ll say it anyway 

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry, hmm

I’m sorry 

Though it’s far too late 

“I thought I was already doing that,” a faint voice huffed in annoyance. Turning the corner, I saw Ao’nung and (Y/N) standing on the beach together— far too close for my liking. 

“You were, but you got sloppy. Here, you have to move your hips like this,” he said as he corrected her posture. My ears flattened against my head as he put a hand on her hip and gently directed her movement.

Why did he look so gentle with her?

“Ao’nung,” (Y/N)’s voice rang out, clear as crystal despite her uncertain tone. “Are you sure you should be teaching me this? This is a traditional Metkayina dance, right? I’m…” she hesitated, her voice becoming smaller. “I’m not Metkayina—” 

“Yet.” He interrupted, holding her face in his hands. “You are not Metkayina yet. Once you become one of us, you will have to learn the dance to celebrate the return of our spirit brothers and sisters, so why not learn that now?” I hated how reassuring his voice was. The thought of how either of their eyes looked as they held contact made my stomach turn.

“Yeah… you’re right,” she mumbled with an unsure look on her face.

“Woah, hey pretty girl, look at me,” he insisted, laying his hands on her shoulders and bending his neck so they were at eye level. “I’m serious when I say you will become Metkayina one day, so don’t worry yourself over it right now. Okay?” Ao’nung tilted his head to the side, an unbelievably soft expression on his face. “You have me here to help you.”

“Alright…” (Y/N) mumbled, not convinced. 

“If you don’t get rid of that look on your face I’ll throw you into the water,” he said as his face shifted from sincerity to something mischievous. “Or worse… I’ll tickle you,” he threatened.

“You better not Ao’nung, or I swear to the Great Mother herself I will hu—AHH—get away, you skxawng!'' She laughed as she tried to run away, but Ao’nung grabbed hold of her waist and pulled her into his arms. And despite her words of protest, it was clear as day that she was leaning into him while they scuffled on the sand. 

“No!” she shrieked with glee. “You can’t make me go in there again!”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, forest dweller!”

A thought occurred. Should I go up to them? We never got the chance to talk, after all. I took a few steps in their direction before freezing. When was the last time I heard her laugh like that? She had the biggest smile on her face, and the one who made that happen wasn’t me—it was him. 

And if you ever hear this 

I hope you know that 

I’m not proud of who I’ve been, ooh

And if I see you again

I hope you know that 

I wish you nothing but the best

And my biggest regret

The afternoon was quiet, relative silence only interrupted by the crashing of waves. Without much to do, I just sat in our marui and lazed around with Tuk until a horn blew. 

“The tulkun have returned! Everybody—our brothers and sisters have returned!” Tsireya’s voice rang out, and when I poked my head out to see what the fuss was about, I saw the megawatt smile on her face, as she swam by on her ilu. 

The village came to life as everyone mounted either ilu or canoe to make their way to the tulkun. From here, I could see little more than a large group of dark shapes making their way through the water. Payakan himself was dauntingly huge, but to see a whole pod of them show up like this? It was spectacular. I watched the commotion unfold from one of the walkways, lost in thought before I felt water splashing at my feet. 

“Come on Lo’ak! Don’t just stand there, let’s go see the tulkun together!” Tsireya urged, still smiling. Shaken out of my stupor, I grinned widely—diving into the water and clambering onto her ilu. lu may be lithe animals, but I could still feel sinuous muscle under velvety skin as it made adjustments in the water to keep balance. 

“I’ll come, but only if you’re offering a ride,” I joked, gently holding her waist and playfully leaning onto her. The cool water around us made her skin feel that much warmer. It was nice. 

Before I could see her reaction—I would’ve bet anything at that moment that her cheeks had become flushed—we began to quickly make our way toward the rest of the clan and the giant tulkun. 

The air around me vibrated with the excitement and happiness of loved ones returning, and Tsireya was no exception—the speed of the ilu gave away her eagerness to be with her spirit sister. As we leaped into and out of the water, Tsireya’s laughter was carried by the wind and reached my ears. That, and the answering whoops and bellows of Metkayina and tulkun alike, was almost contagious enough to get carried away by the energy surrounding us. 

“My spirit sister is down there,” she said as she dismounted, sliding off her ilu and into the water. “Wait here, yeah?” she smiled at me before diving down.  

I was more than happy to watch the Na’vi around me. Looking around, I was in awe of the sheer amount of tulkun gathered in one area, and how each Metkayina was able to identify their spirit sisters or brothers so easily. Looking down into the shifting waters, I saw Tsireya catching up with her spirit sister, waving her hands around and swimming through the water alongside her.

All around, I could hear people telling stories and the deep, booming calls of the tulkun as they responded with tales of their own. New parents were showing their babies and calves, and as my eyes scanned the horizon, I could see small children holding onto the tulkun’s fins as they were lifted to the glittering ocean surface.  

Not too far away, I heard the sound of a body hitting the water and the sound of grating, but familiar laughter along with an indignant (Y/N) sputtering. 

“Ao’nung, what the fu—” 

“Hey, hey, relax! It’s just some water. There are children here, yuey,” Ao’nung chided with a shit-eating grin on his face. 

“The parents of those children are going to have to explain what it means to return to Eywa once I’m through with you,” she retorted, treading water and becoming even more unamused when he raised his hands in mock surrender. 

“Woah there pretty girl, you’re talking to the son of the mightiest warrior in all of Pandora—”

“That’s funny, I don’t see Neteyam here,” she interjected, pretending to search the waters around them before turning back to Ao’nung and tilting her head, “do you?”

“Just because you said that you can have fun finding your own way back to shore,” he said as he turned his ilu around.

“Oh, c’mon Ao’nung, don’t be like that,” she rolled her eyes and reached a hand towards him. “You’d really leave me here to fend for myself?”

He turned and wagged a disapproving finger at her, “I’ll consider forgiving you if you say word-for-word that I’m the son of the mightiest warrior in all of Pandora. I can’t have you slandering my father’s name, yuey.” She groaned and leaned back into the water. 

“You couldn’t pay me enough to say that load of bull—”

“Nope!” he didn’t give her a chance to defile the ears of any nearby children and crossed his arms. “I wanna hear you say it.”

“...”

“I’m still waiting.”

With a sardonic smile, she finally caved. “Why don’t I do you one better? You’re the mightiest warrior to exist since the time of the First Songs,” she declared, sarcasm dripping from every word as she slapped at the water for emphasis. 

“That’s what I thought, was that so hard?” Even if I wasn’t able to see them, I still would have been able to hear the stupidly wide smile that made its way across his face.

“Don’t be such a big baby and let me meet your spirit brother!” 

“Just because he’s here to visit today, I’ll let that one slide for now.” Ao’nung rolled his eyes, dismounting his ilu to join (Y/N). “Now hold on tight and hold your breath like how we practiced.”

We? Who the fuck was we? Why was he allowing her to meet his spirit brother? Why were they looking at each other like that?

I watched both of their silhouettes submerge and breathed deeply, forcing my thundering heart to calm as I slowly sank my head into the water. At first, all I could see were blobs floating around in the water, but once my eyes adjusted, I could see the fluid movement of Ao’nung talking to his spirit brother. Eyebrows furrowing, I swam a little closer and hoped that I would be able to see what was being signed. With each movement made, it was clear that Ao’nung was translating the clicks and bellows of the tulkun to (Y/N), and whatever was being said made her smile widen by the second. 

I couldn’t watch anymore as my chest burned from the lack of air and I resurfaced to catch my breath. For once, I was thankful for the lack of lung capacity I had. I climbed back onto Tsireya’s ilu. Seeing as she wasn’t back yet, I sat back and leaned on its neck to face the sky.

Did she always glow like that when she smiled? Whenever she was with him—she always looked so happy, so vibrant. Would she have looked like that with me by her side if I didn’t push her away? If I was there for her like I had promised? I wanted to tell her sorry—that I was sorry for taking our friendship for granted, for making her go through it alone. I wish that it didn’t take seeing her smile and laugh with someone else to make me realize how I felt.

I willed my tears to go away. 

Is this how she felt? Seeing me with Tsireya? Great Mother… I was truly horrible, wasn’t I? I wished things turned out differently. Maybe in another universe, I did talk to her—realized sooner, made her happier—but now? Right now, my heart was torn in two, watching as someone else picked up the pieces of the heart I crushed. No amount of words could fix what we used to have, and even though I wanted to whisk her away, tell her I love her—that I see her—that seeing her with him made my skin crawl, I knew I couldn’t. I was no longer worthy to be part of her life, because of me and my actions alone. 

I had become nothing but a stranger. 

Ever since that day 

The things I didn’t say 

They haunt me

I know that I’m to blame

So go ahead and 

Blame it on me, ooh

I know that I’m too late 

But I’ll say it anyway

I’m sorry

I’m sorry 

Hmm, I’m sorry 

Oh-oh-oh-oh, I’m sorry

Taglist: @midnightliacr @immortalbloodhuntress @arminsfloll @whenercolorfulrainbowlol @dakotali @lexilander27 @zatarias-pandora @vanillawhale @kazupop @owaowaowawa @sopiasleeps @siabhshjsjsjsjshznzn @jimfiqs @ihave500hubbiez

[moonstruckme]

omg hi! I love your writing so much and I’ve seen that you asked for doctor Remus requests and he’s on my mind day and night, I simply love how you write him. I don’t know if it’s a thing in other countries as well but in mine you have to go to the doctors around your birthday for like check ups and stuff like that, mine is coming up and I’m already dreading it (mostly because of the blood test, I end up fainting every time😣) but I’m sure it would be better if it was with Remus instead🥰

Thanks for requesting sweetheart, hope it goes okay!!

cw: description of anxiety, mention of needle, implied blood

doctor!Remus x fem!reader ♡ 972 words

The doctor’s voice is so soothing you keep almost forgetting where you are. You don’t even think he’s doing it on purpose. 

“Alright.” He catches your ankle before you can kick him, sharing a smile with you as he pockets the small mallet he’s been using to test your reflexes. “Everything seems perfect.” 

“Thanks,” you say, then feel stupid.

You don’t know why you’re acting like he’s complimented you. You’re getting flustered by his raspy timbre and attractive hands (which had, just a few minutes before, felt gently along your neck and the underside of your jaw like you were a thing to be treated with care. Not that that’s important). The doctor—Remus, he’d told you to call him—smiles politely anyway. 

“All that’s left to do is get you sorted at the lab,” he says, typing something quickly into his computer, “and then you’re free to go. Ready?” 

“Um, yeah.” It’s a struggle to hear yourself over the beating of your heart. You can only hope you sound normal. You’d known this was coming, and still it’s giving you the cold sweats. “I just feel like I should maybe warn you, I tend not to do well with the blood test.” 

He glances over. “You’ve had problems before?” 

“I sometimes faint.” Your foot starts jiggling of its own accord. You don’t notice until Remus’ gaze drops to it. You stop. “Every time, actually.” 

“That’s fine,” he says, straightening and turning away from the computer. “In that case, I’ll probably keep you in here so we can do it with you lying down. Does that sound alright?” 

You blink. “Um, sure.” 

The nerves are hard to miss in your voice now, and you can’t quite meet Remus’ eyes as he directs a gentle smile your way. He gives your knee a squeeze on his way to the door.

“I’m going to go get some things,” he tells you. “I’ll be back soon, but while I’m gone I just want you to practice taking some deep breaths, yeah?” 

You nod. Another flash of that small, reassuring smile as he goes out the door. 

You try to do as he says, forcing your lungs to fill and then empty and attempting to ignore the pounding of your heartbeat. You can feel it in your face, in your temples, in your teeth. You’ll think you’re starting to get it to slow, and then a pair of footsteps will come down the hall and it’ll speed right back up again. 

It’s almost a relief when Remus comes back, putting an end to your apprehensive torment. 

“You can go ahead and lay back, love,” he says, holding the supplies low where you can hardly see them, and you take care not to try. The paper crinkles underneath you as you flatten out on your back. Remus chuckles when it tears a bit and you wince. “You’re fine, it can’t be helped. I’m just going to feel for a vein, alright? Not doing anything just yet.” 

You keep your gaze on the ceiling as his gloved finger probes gently at the crook of your elbow. It’s hopelessly plain and undiverting up there, no tiles to count or anything. 

“How are you feeling?” Remus asks conversationally. 

“Okay.” Your voice comes out with a bit of squeak to it, not entirely convincing. 

“Keep breathing for me.” The warmth of his touch leaves, and then a rubbery tourniquet is being tied around your arm. “I don’t want you to worry about fainting. It’s perfectly alright if you do, but we’re going to do our best to keep that from happening, okay?” 

You nod. “Okay.” 

“Good, just try and stay relaxed.” His voice drops lower, and now you know the soothing effect is intentional, each of his words mellow and mollifying. “Any plans for after you leave here?” 

“I, um.” You tense when you feel the cold wipe swipe over your elbow. Remus thumbs over your forearm calmingly. “I don’t know.” 

“Seems like you deserve a sweet or something after this, yeah? What sort of things do you like?” 

“I did buy myself ice cream,” you admit, “to have after I get home.” 

“Smart girl.” There’s a smile in Remus’ voice. You’re tempted to lift your head and see it for yourself, but you don’t. “I like the pre-planning. What kind is it?” 

You feel the odd bite of the needle into your skin, and your breath catches. 

“You’re alright,” he promises you, rubbing the inside of your forearm again. “What kind of ice cream did you get, sweetheart?” 

You swallow. “It’s that new, fancy gelato kind.” Your voice sounds higher than before. 

“Oh, I haven’t tried that yet. What flavor?” 

You’re starting to get a bit dizzy. “Chocolate cherry?”

“That sounds fantastic. I’m quite partial to chocolate myself.” You feel something shift, and Remus says, “Nearly done. You might be convincing me to pick some of that up. You’ll have to come back here and give me your thoughts once you’ve finished it.” 

You laugh a little, and he echoes it. 

“Keep still,” he reminds you. 

“Sorry.” 

“No, don’t be.” You feel the needle come out. It surprises you, a quiet whimper slipping from inside your throat. He tsks kindly. “All done, love. You did really well.” 

“Seriously?” You lift your head, and Remus’ eyes are faintly amused as they meet yours. He’s sticking a bandage over your arm. 

“Very seriously,” he confirms. “You did beautifully. That ice cream is well deserved.” 

The laugh that leaves you is light and pitchy with disbelief. “Thank you. I really owe you your own ice cream, after this.” 

He wraps a hand around your elbow, helping you to sit back up. “Careful,” he says lightly, “I might hold you to that. Next time I see you, I’ll be expecting a detailed review at the least.”

[i-say-stupid-things]

Since your post went viral I’ve been trying to come up with a more meaningful way to respond to the chronically ill. I have never said “get well soon” per se, but I always say “ I hope you feel better.” This is not to dismiss the person (I think we all understand is chronically means they have to deal with the pain); it is that the pain is causing them suffering and I wish that they adding have to suffer. Not only that, but some chronically I’ll do in fact have treatment to not always feel pain so it is different from person to person.

As someone who gets chronically Ill myself I always thought it was nice for someone to say that. Whenever I complain or vent about my pain, I want someone to acknowledge it and be positive. Is there some other response someone would want ? Maybe something like “you are valid” or “your pain is real” ?

hi! sorry my response took a while! i finally have the spoons to respond to stuff but we’ll see how long that lasts hahah

anyway! to get to answering your questions:

i wanna preface by saying that only recently been made aware that what i’m dealing with is not “normal” & am still coming to terms with that. so it might change for someone who’s been dealing with this for a while & also obviously can just change for any other chronically ill person! (also my first language isn’t english so i am just translating my struggles & annoyances as well as possible)

but personally, i am absolutely okay with people wishing me to feel better! my problem is with people wishing me to get better. i think it is this way for a lot of chronically ill people (i’m unsure tho) but generally (i think) chronic illnesses get worse with age. they don’t get better… however people can have days where they feel better! sometimes even days where it feels like we aren’t sick at all! that’s why wishing someone to feel better is totally okay in my eyes. you’re not telling them to get healthy again (bc as nice as it would be, they can’t.) but that they have nicer and easier days ahead of them! and that’s a nice sentiment, i’d say!

i think validation of the pain someone is going through can be really nice as well! some things people could say (that i could think of while writing this & that i’ll say to my friends whenever they’re in any kind of pain)

- what you have to deal with sucks and i hope you have days with less pain ahead of you

- i hope easier days come soon

- i hope your flare up ends soon

- i hope your pain eases up quickly

- you’re feelings about this are understandable and i hope your flare up is over soon

- may you have easier days ahead of you

or literally any combination/variation of these! also others can feel free to add onto this!

[fifis-cosmos]

you have no say in what you do.... ANYWAYS you should do Felix as a florist or like a baker with a tattoo artist/ motorcycle person pwease 👉👈 (you better do this because I know where you live 👹)

Bottom Felix??????????/?/??.??.?!!???

I can imagine you meet him at his job, pulling up on your motorcycle. He’d be in love. You have all of those tattooed, and your helmet is tucked under your arm. He thinks you are super badass.

You tell him that two angel wings would look amazing inked on the freckled skin between his shoulder blades, and if he likes you enough, he’ll let you do it.

The first time he rides as your backpack, he’s terrified. You always look so cool and sexy when you do it, but actually being on the back of this thing is horrifying. He’s holding around your waist like if he lets go the wind will blow him off the back. Even if he’s bigger than you, he’s hunched over you, trying to stay as close as possible.

Maybe you pull something cheeky like jerking the breaks so his hips bump against yours.

The more times you give him a ride, the more comfortable he gets. Soon he just likes it to hug you, and grab your thighs. He likes to tease you at stops, bumping his helmet on yours and squeezing you.

Honestly it’s a good idea maybe I’ll write a full one sometime 🤫

Also: SHOUTOUT TO MY BESTIE (she didn’t hold me at gunpoint) ILY THANKS FOR THE ASK

[miuszn]

Hi! I love ur writing sm and was wondering if you could do some,thing with Ellie where reader is maybe a little chubby (cause I relate😭) and gets a little insecure about herself or her body? Just Ellie comforting her but ofc if you don’t want to that’s fine!

hiii anon <3 first of all tysm im so happy to hear u like my writing 🥹🩷 n of course i can do that lovely !! just a heads up tho , since i don’t know what it’s like to be chubby this is just going to be a short drabble i hope u don’t mind 😭🩷 i’m just not rlly good at writing about stuff i haven’t experienced or struggled with ( i do have an idea of what it’s like to struggle w insecurities but due to diff reasons ) and i’m scared i’ll portray it inaccurately so i hope u get that hehe <33 that said , pls enjoy !!

— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —

ellie and you loved taking walks together. that was sort of your thing. walking through the overgrown fields, enjoying the fresh air and the warm sunshine. that day, however, you weren’t exactly feeling the best. you struggled a lot with your self-esteem due to the fact you didn’t exactly fit society’s standard of skinny, but most importantly, you were thinking about how a lot of the girls ellie had been with before didn’t look a lot like you. thin, fit, whatever way you wanna describe it. it had been in the back of your mind for a few weeks, but it was a thought you could mostly overlook. but you couldn’t ignore it any longer once you went out with some friends to grab lunch and one of them made the god forsaken “should you really be eating all that?” comment despite your meal being a completely normal size. the insecurities you r thought were now behind you were all coming back at once.

ellie noticed the change in your demeanor and looked at you with concern. "hey, what's going on? you seem a little down."

“it’s nothing,” you shrugged, not wanting to burden ellie with your troubles. but she could always read you like a book.

"hey,” she stopped and held your hand, looking into your eyes. “i know there’s something that’s troubling you. what’s wrong?”

you looked down, feeling embarrassed. "well.. i know i'm not exactly.. thin. it’s just i know all the girls you dated before were all so fit and skinny and i’m not and it’s just-“

“hey, look at me,” ellie cut you off. “you don’t need to compare yourself to them. you’re beautiful and i love you regardless of whether you fit some stupid standard or not. besides, it didn’t work out despite all that. i’m with you because i love you no matter what you look like, okay?”

although her words did make you feel a little bit better, at least with that specific issue, you were still feeling mostly down from the comment your friend made and the fact no one else stood up for you then. still, you tried not to show it, but as always, ellie could always tell.

“i know there’s something else on your mind, babe. spit it out.”

you sighed and explained to her what had happened the day prior and how none of your other friends said anything about it, some even laughed but tried to hold it in to not hurt your feelings.

“let’s sit down for a bit,” she said, and you could see her eyes full of anger. “listen to me, i love you just the way you are. i wouldn’t change anything about you. who do those fuckers even think they are anyway? as soon as i find them i’m gonna beat the shit out of all of the-“

“ellie, stop,” you cut her off. “you don’t have to do that. i won’t hang out with them anymore and i don’t want to cause any issues.”

“they caused the issue the second they thought they had the right to comment on what you were eating.”

“i know that but- please. it’s not worth it.”

she sighed in disappointment, but understood. although you were sometimes grateful for her habit of beating up anyone who crosses you, often times it could just cause even more issues and you didn’t want to drag her into anything else.

she wrapped her arms around you and held you close. “you know you can always talk to me about anything. and you don’t have to think about what anyone has to say. i love you no matter what. never forget that, okay?”

you nodded, and that’s when it hit you. she truly loves you unconditionally. a few tears welled up in your eyes but you hid it out of embarrassment. you so felt safe and happy in her arms, especially now that you know for sure you don’t have to worry about her leaving you for the way you look, and that she won’t hold you up to any standards. you weren’t exactly sure what you’d do with your friends when you got back, but all that mattered to you in that moment was that you had her, no matter what.

[all-yn-oween]

No way, it’s already 20th of April again! To celebrate Louis’ birthday again, let me show you this comic I just finished for one of my classes…. 👀 The theme was “Write a story that takes place in a Parisian Museum, in 4 pages…”

[Carnavalet Museum, 1913. 11:35pm]

Gustave: First night as a Night Guard…

Gustave: Goddamn Im so bored.

Gustave: Wait a minute.. who is this guy?

Gustave: Is he the owner of the place? Another guard? I’ll better introduce myself…

Gustave: Wait a second… if he is the owner, why is he running away??

Gustave: Uhm… are you okay?

Louis: Ha.. ha… yes.. yes thank you! Louis, My name is Louis.

Gustave: Gustave Bréant. Nice to meet you.

Gustave: You know… I never would’ve thought that I’d save someone from chocking on a petal during my first shift.

Louis: Ha ha! Cant help it! Those are the tastiest flowers of all Paris!!

Gustave: Well.. but it’s still a museum here…

Louis: Speaking of that— now that we introduced ourselves, what do you think about a nightly visit?

Gustave: … Lets go!

Gustave : I’ve never been passionate about art.

Gustave: But with this guy… I’m surprised to actually enjoy visiting the Museum.

Gustave: How does a single person can brighten a moment that much?

Gustave: ….. Shit… I really fell for him.

Gustave: I even start to see him in the paintings now?!?— wait… is he eating flowers in there as well??

Louis: You’re making a weird face, what are you looking at?

Louis: Eh!! Those two look kinda similar to us, right?

Gustave: Wait… so you see them as well? I’m not going crazy?

Louis: I do! We look cute, painted like that! And who knows? Maybe it was our fate to meet.

Louis: Maybe we even met before!!

[…]

Louis: So you have the right to leave your job place like that? Arent you supposed to guard it?

Gustave: I cant, no.. but what a shitty job anyway

Louis: I’m not complaining! Who needs a job when youre in good company?

Gustave: … You’re paying bills and food with love ? Oh, speaking of food, do you want to go grab sometimes to eat.

Gustave: Maybe there are still open restaurants at that time.

Louis: There it goes, you can’t live without me anymore!!!

Gustave: Well, I found you, I’m not letting you go now. …. So, about the restaurant?

Louis: I’m in! Do you think they serve flowers?

Gustave: Louis… Can’t you eat something other than flowers???

Louis: Let’s say I’ll make an effort for you. Alright! Let’s go find a nice place!

[The End? :}….]

—

here it was :D It was fun to do, laborious, but fun!! 🥹 I’ve told myself that if I have more than 18/20 as a mark on the project, I do more parts of their story… So who knows? Might as well see more of them in the 1910’s soon….

[formulakatya]

I’LL JUST LET YOU LIVE | PIERRE GASLY

“there’s things i wanna say to you but i’ll just let you live”

not my gif :)

pairing: pierre gasly x reader

summary: having broken up with your childhood best friend and boyfriend of 2 years, you struggle to move on and resort to writing letters.

notes: loosely based off ‘cinnamon girl’ by lana del rey, hence the title. a little sloppy and messy which i apologise for, none of my writing seem to be up to satisfaction recently and i still don’t really know how to edit my work :(

warnings: none, just a little angsty

—

dear pierre,

sometimes, i look back at our relationship only to find memories where i can’t remember anything but pure joy. i look back at the pictures and videos and i can only see genuine love.

maybe you just do happen to be an excellent actor and were pretending all this while, or maybe you just stopped loving me and decided to pretend that you still did so that i would be able to prepare for my exams in peace. but whatever the reason, none of them are exactly better than the other.

i hate how france and the streets of rouen remind me too much of us to the point i had to move out to switzerland to let myself live without a depressing memory playing at the back of my head or with a constant worry i’d run into you somehow.

thankfully, i can still watch formula 1 and motorsport in peace without a single thought about the memories we made over the years. but i guess my love for motorsport is rooted in me. that’s how we became friends anyway. but, for as long as i think i’ll be watching racing for, i’ll never cheer you on.

though it hurts me to say that because i know i’d give injustice to my heart. i hate how my heart can still long for you though i tell myself that i hate you. i hate how i can’t delete the pictures from my camera roll because as soon as i do because my heart skips at least 10 beats at once when i take a look at how we were happy and the way you used to look at me.

my smiles were genuine, and it pains me to know that yours were never quite as real.

i hate how i could tell myself that i hate you again and again but still wish that i could have what we had back. i hate how i could say ‘i love you’ to you easily and struggle to say it with the same amount of admiration and love to someone else. i hate that i can say ‘i love you’ to you a million times and it still wouldn’t be enough.

i hate that i still love you.

love,

(y/n)

_________________

dear pierre,

it’s been 3 months since i last wrote, 7 since we broke up. it’s been months since the last time i had seen you and yet, as much as i try to, i can’t get over you.

i’m not surprised that you haven’t responded yet, not that i expected you to, i put your old address on it anyway and it’s probably invalid. i just didn’t want sad letters around my house.

i’ve tried everything i possibly can. i increased my practice hours in my sports, and in case you were wondering which you probably weren’t, i still play golf, i still go skiing in the winter, i still do everything i used to do and more, yet i still feel significantly emptier. it’s probably one of the few things giving me joy at the moment apart from my dog.

if you no longer love me, i hope you still love belle. or at least as much as she loved you because you picked her name. she’s still attached to the toy you got her, by the way, and she misses you. she’s also taken up your side of the bed in case you were wondering.

although i’m feeling better than i was since i sat down to write that letter, my heart still aches. it hurts to lose your boyfriend and best friend at the same time, and it hurts even more to know that you probably carried on with your life just fine.

i’ve been told that i lost my sparkle, which is something you probably took along with you considering the state of your car the race after we broke up. was that a bad joke? i feel like it was, for that i apologise, it was insensitive (kind of).

but in all seriousness, i’ve lost my spark and any kind of positive mood.

i still struggle to find peace with myself, i struggle to find my happiness. and maybe with my spark, you also took them away.

if you did, give it back. it was mine first.

love,

(y/n)

_________________

dear pierre,

your mum asked me how i was today, apparently she had lunch with mine and the topic of me moving to switzerland to try and run away from my misery was brought up. obviously, mamma told her that i was fine.

if you see this, tell her that i miss her but it’ll be a while since i see the streets of rouen. and tell her that i’m doing okay in switzerland.

but since i’m writing this letter, i’m not exactly okay. no one tells you how hard it is to move on and heal, much less find peace with yourself again.

sometimes wish i was egotistical about myself, that i was self-centered, because that would mean that i actually liked myself. instead, i’ve become complacent with my own company. everytime i look at myself in the mirror, i can’t help but analyse and critique myself to shreds just to figure out which part of me wasn’t good enough for you.

do you know how hard it is? to know that there’s no way of winning in life? to know that you’ll never be good enough? to know that you’re the second choice?

no, you obviously don’t. now that you’ve won in formula 1, you can officially say that you don’t know how it’s like to know that there’s no way of winning. take that statement how you will.

but i guess for my own sake, i’ll learn how to come to terms with it.

love,

(y/n)

_________________

dear pierre,

i went back to rouen for the first time in a year. that’s how long it’s been. i was meant to be there for a week, which used to be far too short of a trip back, but now it feels too long.

my bedroom at mamma’s house is still filled with pictures of us, ever since the day we became friends when i moved a couple blocks down from you. from this i think you can guess how hellish it must’ve been having to stay in the place that once used to give me so much comfort.

i passed by your old karting track— there was a picture of you hung up on one of the walls. i can’t escape you, can i?

although it scares me how easily i brushed off any questions or mentions of you, or us, because that means i’ve healed and i’m moving on. it scares me because i never thought i’d see the day i would stop loving you.

but now that i think about it, it probably is a good sign that i’m healing.

it’s bad to cling onto the bad things in life after all.

love,

(y/n)

_________________

dear pierre,

remember all the things you said you’d do with me but never did? yeah, i do too, so i went to do all of them by myself. call it a solo date, if you will. at the end of the day, all you really have is yourself, so i figured i’d at least enjoyed my company.

though sometimes, you need someone to help you learn these things with life. but learning isn’t always easy, and i know that i still have a long way to go with my healing.

and considering i’m still writing these pathetic little letters, i have a long way to go but it’s a road i’m willing to take. if that means healing and moving on, if that means appreciating myself, if that means finding my peace and bright spark back, it’s a road i’m willing to go down.

though i’m mad at the broken promises and maybe there’ll still be a small part of me hurt by everything, i’ll try to forgive you.

love,

(y/n)

p.s: congrats on your podium finish

_________________

dear pierre,

thank you for everything i’ve learned.

maybe things do happen for a reason.

love,

(y/n)