#anyway i miss the memory of my dad

[onlylovefordandelions]

A Letter to my Dad that I will Never Send

Do you remember the poem I wrote you? The one called "God Lives in my Father's Mouth". These days I wish I could take it back. I wish I could remove it from you shelf, from your mind. But, maybe it's still relevant, maybe it's still true. I'll never stop believing you're a good person, deep down. One thing I believe is that good and evil is never as black and white as people make it out to be.

And maybe God does still live in your mouth, and maybe that's why you can't see or hear him. Maybe that's why you've been misguided. You claim to be uninspired, or unable to think of any sermons to preach at church now. We joke that its just because you want to disc golf, but I think the truth is less funny. I think God has stopped talking to you, stopped leading you or showing you his word. Because you've been blinded by hate. You no longer understand the word of God, your heart has been poisoned. Maybe it's a bit high and mighty of me to say something like that. I haven't studied the bible the way you have, but I think I got the message just fine. I left the path of God, but I've found myself back on it, and hate is what took me off, and hate never led me back to it, only love brought me back. I know you'd disagree with me, but I wish you could see the truth.

And these days, especially since the election, I keep thinking about how I miss you. But not you now. I miss who you were when I was a kid, or at least who I thought you were. I miss the dad who fed me yogurt after my night terrors, the dad who took me fishing, the dad who believed in me before I did. I've cried over you more than I'd like to admit. I cried for days when we argued about Palestine, because how I thought you saw me shattered. And so did how I saw you. I knew you saw me as a silly little girl, who couldn't tell right from wrong, or form opinions and beliefs on her own. You believe I'm misguided, and that I've fallen for the worlds tricks. But you would never turn that view onto yourself. I believe you've been brainwashed. Or at least that's what I tell myself, because believing you've always felt this way hurts more. I don't want to taint my memory of you. And I realized I've always had an angry man in my chest who has your face and voice. And I don't know how to make him leave. He comes out in me more often than I want. Anger is an emotion I'm not fond of. The lack of control from it at times makes me feel gross. Makes me see you in the mirror. The you I pretended didn't exist, but always knew. I don't know how to make him leave.

How can I make him leave, when he's my dad?

There's a qoute I read once that said something like losing faith in your parents is lile losing faith in God. And how they didn't believe in God anymore, and how they didn't believe in their parents anymore either.

How do I believe in you, like I believe in God again? I don't think I can.

[ivypond11]

it's been a week and i still haven't recovered </3 so i did a little sketch with this scene between normal and scary because it fucked me up and i need more moments of them comforting and caring for each other

[this-is-a-name-dont-worry]

"Wait is that lore?" moments in Antoine's return stream

These ones are likely jokes, but (you can use it in your headcanons):

With Tubbo, explaining his absence by saying "I was dead, I think, but not anymore, I was tired of being dead"

"I couldn't explain to you, it's out of my understanding how I'm dressed. The human mind cannot comprehend how I'm dressed and so the human brain shows it that way, but it isn't exactly like that. It's not powerful, it's just weird"

"You know me well!" "Heh, I know you as if I made you!" *silence* (closest to maybe serious)

These ones are more serious:

He isn't romantically interested by Cucurucho, he just likes his ass (that totally a human is aro that's what I mean)

He really missed Pomme, he stopped coming because without her it wasn't interesting anymore (this one is just cute)

Very invested in knowing what happened to the eggs while they were away

Accidentally gave Pomme one of the books Ourson (I think it's this one?) gave him, immediately panicking when he realized. When Pomme asks what it was, he first tries to pretend not to understand, and is pretty serious when he tells her that it's nothing; he'll tell her about it one day, and it's his little secret garden, everyone should be allowed to have secrets, don't she think? she isn't against secrets, right?

Certain that the eggs went to some kind of other dimensions/got doubles?? I mean there was a theory inspired by Stranger Things but despite what Pomme is saying he's not letting go of the idea

After asking Pomme if she met dark Cucurucho and she talks about the Watcher: "Je crois pas qu'on parle de la même chose. Là tu me parles de l'oeil, et moi je pense que je te parle de quelque chose d'autre. Je pense que tu me parles du Watcher... là où moi je te parle d'autre chose." ("I think we're not talking about the same thing. Here you're talking about the eye, and me I think I'm talking about something else. I think you're talking about the Watcher... when me I talk about something else" again how does he know the name "Watcher".)

Knows that Maximus is dead, when all the other players seem to have decided to play the "don't know if he's alive or dead" card (bonus: Antoine and Pomme talking about telling Aypierre, and Pomme thinking she won't be able to find the right words "I don't think there are right words..." ok im sad now thanks). Since we're at it, when reading Pomme diary where she worries about Baghera and Antoine being dead, saying they can't be dead, he doesn't share that worry in the slightest, as if he knows Baghera's not dead (this one's dubious and I am very willing to put it as cc!Antoine not thinking rp)

He and Pomme are talking about what she remembers of the Watcher and honestly the whole conversation deserves to be clipped and transcribed. To go with him name dropping the Watcher, he is now only calling it the creature with one eye because that's how Pomme calls it

Pomme explains that the Watcher was observing her and Richas and there was a threatening aura to it, so they immediately fled. Antoine in a very serious voice "You were right to, you were right to, you were right to. Because I think it's this person who was at the origin of your disappearance."

[moonchild-in-blue]

Oh.

[racingmiku2018]

i remember when me and my siblings were helping my dad pack up to move apartments one of us accidentally packed his full inhaler with the empty ones and we brought that box of inhalers to the new place and drove back to the old one and when my dad found out he said "ill just let myself die if i have an asthma attack" and then later in the night he did have an asthma attack and i had to call an ambulance for him and when they got there they helped him with his stupid asthma and then had to help me because i was having a panic attack bc i thought i had put the inhaler in the wrong box and it wouldve been my fault if he died. i was 15

[mappingway]

Homecoming

Rating: G Warnings: mentions of babies Fandom: FFXIV Ships: None mentioned/specified Spoilers: HW spoilers; vague EW spoilers Word Count: > 500

“His name is Hau,” she said. The squabbling behind the couch ceased. The babe snorted, kicked his feet, and curled ever closer into Edmont’s arm; in a voice that sounded very much as if Emmanellain were but a dozen summers old himself, he attempted, “He - … you named him… Hau? Haurchefant?” FFXIVWrite2024, day 11: surrogate. After the end of the world, the Warrior of Light returns to her chosen family… with family of her own.

Read HERE.

My personal FFXIVWrite2024 Series can be found HERE.

[isfjmel-phleg]

😶

[merkerlerspeaks]

on a scale of 1-10 how silly would it be to ask folks to pray that I find a piece of jewelery I lost. It's not particularly valuable monetarily but its very precious to me and Im afraid I lost it outside of the house. I cant find it anywhere it should be. It could be in the pocket of the either the pajama pants or outside pants I wore the last day I saw it (the 19th) or it could be buried under something in my old bedroom, or it could be at my friend's moms house or somewhere between here and there. Trying not to stress over it but its just become precious too me.

[xxxemilyg1996]

Happy dead dad day!

[eebie]

UNCLE IROH VOICES AKU… LEAVES FROM THE VINE ……..

[silverwhittlingknife]

superboy: the man of tomorrow 1 spoilers

(it's just one panel but below the cut just in case)

memory identification: go!

[binesetakeout]

my roman empire i think is my relationship with my dad (good)

[britneyshakespeare]

my great auntie barbara has been a widow for almost 10 years now. uncle jack died in summer 2014. and with my grandfather gone she's without her only brother too. today was the wake for my grandfather and she looked absolutely beautiful, i told her as much, she was the best-dressed lady there. and it's been almost three years since my grandmother died and you could tell there was a different understanding between her and my grandfather whenever they got together. it became more necessary to invite barbara to extended-family events when her husband died, but after grammy died it was just about mandatory. there was just something about the two of them sitting together, brother and sister, in their 90s having lost their life partners, but sitting with the only other person left that they had known for as long, no, even longer. as far back as they could each remember. they both looked like they were in the company of their favorite living person. so it was hard to see her at the wake although she looked beautiful and she always does; she has a wonderful smile. it must be hard to be the last survivor of your generation. i just hope she goes home and she has something that makes her feel not so lonely.

[fooltofancy]

i don't miss living near most of my family, tbh, but i DO miss terribly the recovered meth addict uncle.

[not-to-be-gay-but-holy-shit]

Damn yall ever experience grief for the first real time during your existence on earth and then proceed to ghost everyone in your virtual life that you could conceivably ghost for a whole year

[pansy2005]

my problematic trait is that i still love disneyland and i always will