#she’s doing like. fencing now Like professionally
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eebie · 5 months ago
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UNCLE IROH VOICES AKU… LEAVES FROM THE VINE ……..
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hedgehog-moss · 5 months ago
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I know your blog focuses on Pampe, professional criminelid, but you’ve been focusing on your new garden (and you should rightfully be proud of it). Um, so what’s stopping your animals from munching on the fruits of your labor?
The beautiful fence that I built!!
My vegetable garden is outside the pasture, but I've left a door in the fence just in front of it so I can let the animals out sometimes to weed the area (under close supervision). You can see the opening in this pic:
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My fence has been such a success btw <3 I know it doesn't sound like it because there are still occasional llama escapes, but that's because I've only built the Ultimate Anti-Pampe Fence along 2 sides of the pasture (which is roughly triangle-shaped). It took me two years to finish it but since completion it's never been outsmarted! The only time Pampe got through this fence was after a boar had boared his way through it first, which is not my poor fence's fault. It was designed to be Pampe-proof not everything-proof. And I refuse to count an instance of Pampe escaping through a hole made by a wild animal as Pampe defeating my fence, unless she can provide evidence of having personally set up a secret programme training boars for this job.
The problematic side of the pasture is the hypotenuse which still has the old, non-Pampe-proof fence left by the former owners—so the few times she escaped in the past year, it was from there. I've been playing the long game because there are lots of hazel trees growing there and they grow quite fast, so I'd like to fence this side with a hazel hedgerow. Pampe has so far never escaped through the (still-growing) hazel fence, not even in winter when it's leafless! However there are several Danger Points—gaps in the hedgerow here and there. I've been planting different kinds of flowering shrubs or evergreen hedge plants in these gaps to close them but this fencing method takes time. Especially since Pirlouit often tries to eat my living fence while it's still young. It's a fun project though; by now the woman at the plant nursery is used to me showing up asking for a new anti-llama plant for my hedge. Here's one of the gaps I'm trying to fill:
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I have also been thwarted in my efforts to obtain a living fence two years in a row, by the city hall guy who trims roadside trees—he kept trimming my hazel hedgerow so it was like 1m50, and I kept desperately reminding him that it needs to be much taller. The next year he trimmed it so it was 1m70 and I was like, no. I need it to be taller. You know my llama. He was like, okay, how tall? Just tell me and I'll trim it at the height you want. I said, one hundred metres tall I don't know, she gets smarter every year! By the time she learns how to fly I need my hedge to be visible from space!
He no longer trims these hazel trees.
If I were a tour guide in a sightseeing bus I would be like, on your right ladies and gentlemen is a normal hedgerow bordering a cow pasture; on your left is the Great Anti-Pampe Wall. Kindly do not throw your chewing-gums over the hedge she might use them as suction cups to attempt the climb.
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heartysworld · 4 months ago
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Riding into love // LN4
Lando Norris x Reader
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W.C.:2k
The one time Lando turned his niece's horse riding lesson into a speed dating event.
MASTERLIST
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It was a bright Saturday morning when Lando Norris found himself in front of his car, waiting for his niece Mila to grab her riding gear. His brother Oliver had entrusted Lando with taking Mila to her horse-riding lessons for the day, and Lando was eager to spend some quality time with his favorite little girl.
“Uncle Lando, I’m ready!” Mila called out as she bounded down the steps, dressed in her attire, her riding helmet clutched under her arm and a huge smile on her face.
“Alright, let’s go, champ,” Lando replied, ruffling her hair. He opened the door to the car, and Mila hopped in, bubbling with excitement.
The drive to the riding stables was filled with Mila’s chatter about her friends, her horse, and everything she loved about riding. Lando listened attentively, enjoying her enthusiasm and making a mental note to remember all the little details she shared.
When they arrived at the stables, Mila quickly spotted her best friend, your younfer sister, Lily. You were busy helping Lily with her helmet when Lando and Mila approached.
“Hi, Lily! Hi, Y/N!” Mila greeted them cheerfully.
“Hey, Mila! Hi, Mr. Norris,” Lily replied politely.
Lando smiled and corrected her, “Please, call me Lando.”
You looked up and offered a friendly smile. “Nice to see you again, Lando. Thanks for bringing Mila today.”
“No problem at all. She’s been telling me all about how much she loves horse riding on our way here.” Lando replied, his eyes briefly meeting yours.
Mila and Lily quickly ran off to get their horses ready, leaving you and Lando standing by the fence. There was a moment of silence before Lando decided to break the ice.
“So, how long have you been coming here with Lily?” Lando asked.
You looked over at him and replied, “A few years now. Lily started when she was six, and she’s been hooked ever since. What about Mila?
“Just over a year. She’s obsessed with it,” Lando said, chuckling. “She even told me she wants to be a professional rider one day.”
You laughed. “Sounds like Lily. It’s great to see them so passionate about something, though.”
Lando nodded in agreement, watching as Mila and Lily mounted their horses. “Yeah, it is. It’s nice to see them happy.”
A comfortable silence settled between them as they watched the girls begin their lesson. You caught Lando glancing at you occasionally, admiring your smile and the way you interacted with Lily and the other kids. There was something about you that he found incredibly attractive.
After a while, you turned to him. “So, Lando, do you ride?”
“Me? Not really. I mean, I’ve tried it a couple of times, but I’m more comfortable with four wheels under me,” Lando joked.
You laughed. “I figured as much. It’s a different kind of thrill, that’s for sure.”
Lando smiled, feeling a bit more confident. “Maybe you could give me some tips sometime. You know, if you’re free.”
You raised an eyebrow, a playful smile on her lips. “Are you asking me out, Lando Norris?”
Lando chuckled, a slight blush creeping up his neck. “Maybe I am. Would you say yes if I did?”
“Depends on where you’re planning to take me.” You teased.
“How about dinner? Somewhere nice, where we can talk without the sound of engines or horse hooves,” Lando suggested.
You considered for a moment, then nodded. “Alright, dinner sounds good.”
Lando grinned. “Great. How about tomorrow night?”
“Tomorrow works. I’ll give you my number so you can text me the details,” You said, pulling out your phone.
The two of you exchanged numbers, and as the lesson ended, Lando couldn’t help but feel a sense of excitement. He hadn’t expected to score a date while taking his niece to her riding lesson, but he wasn’t complaining.
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One date after another, you fount yourself infatuated with Lando and his presence. It was no surprise to you when he asked you to be his girlfriend on the fourth date. Ever since then, he spent every free moment either with you or coming up with arrangements on how to take you with him to as many places as possible.
Several months into your relationship, Lando decided it was time for you to meet his family at one of their family dinners. Your relationship had grown serious, and he wanted you to feel like a part of his life, both on and off the track.
The evening of the gathering, you arrived at Lando’s family home, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. Lando greeted you with a kiss and led you inside, where his family welcomed you warmly. Oliver and his wife, Savannah, couldn’t help but joke about Lando’s knack for turning a simple outing into a romantic escapade.
“The one time we leave my brother take Mila to a riding lesson and he managesto score a date. How does that happen?” Oliver teased, nudging his brother playfully.
Lando laughed, wrapping an arm around you. “What can I say? I’ve got skills.” He said, before leaving a soft kiss on the side of your head.
Savannah smiled warmly at you. “We’re just glad to see him so happy. He’s been talking about you non-stop for the past couple of months.”
You blushed, feeling the warmth of their acceptance. The evening was filled with laughter, stories, and delicious food. You felt at ease with Lando’s family, and it was clear how much they cared for him.
As the night drew to a close, you and Lando found a quiet moment together on the porch. The stars were twinkling above, and the soft hum of conversation filled the air from inside the house.
“Thank you for bringing me here,” you said, resting your head on Lando’s shoulder. “Your family is wonderful.”
Lando pressed a kiss to your temple. “I’m glad you liked them. They already adore you.”
You smiled, feeling a sense of belonging. “I adore them too.”
Lando looked at you, his eyes filled with love. “You’ve made my life so much better, baby. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
You leaned in and kissed him, your heart swelling with affection. “I couldn't have said it better, Lan.”
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As the months went by, you and Lando started making mkre and more appearances at the paddock as a couple. The media and fans quickly noticed how much more laid-back and happy Lando seemed, both on and off the track. It didn’t take long for everyone to connect his newfound ease to your presence in his life.
“Looks like someone’s in love,” one of the reporters teased during an interview.
Lando just smiled, glancing over at you as you stood a few feet away from him. “I guess you could say that.
The journey from a horse-riding lesson to a loving relationship had been unexpected but beautiful. You had found each other in the most unlikely of places, and now, you were each other’s biggest supporters, you couldn't ask for a better unexpected match.
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MASTERLIST
Feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
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just-a-sewer-goblin · 20 days ago
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Collars of Duty 1
Hybrid!Simon x reader - Chapter 2 -
When a new problem hybrid is brought to the rehab center, you're called in from medical leave. Having been through hell he's classed as dangerous but you believe he deserves a chance. Hopefully you both can heal each other without adding to old wounds.
I dedicate this story to @kiwiimochi because they said they'd be interested in a story like this. I hope you enjoy and you're welcome to tell me what you think.
Content: hybrid AU, brief description of wounds, allusions to torture
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The call comes through in the middle of the night, ripping you from deep slumber that for once was peaceful.
You wake with a gasp, heart immediately racing to outrun the invisible danger. It takes you a few seconds to blink the last remnants of sleep from your eyes. You’re at home, in your bed. There is no danger around, except the phone that rings impatiently in your bedside drawer.
You recognize the ringtone. It’s your work phone, which hasn’t rung in weeks even though you always keep it on and charged. It’s slightly unsettling to hear it ring at such an ungodly hour. It’s freeing too, to realize that your heart slowly calms down and you do not spiral into a panic attack.
Yawning your reach into the drawer and open it, getting the angrily vibrating phone and hold it up to your ear.
“Hello?”
“We need you here.”
You’re stunned into silence. Everyone knows you’re on medical leave. They should know better than to call you in randomly during the night. They -
“Like right now.” You recognize Elizabeth’s voice and your heartrate skyrockets again.
“Liz, you know that I’m on leave. You know wh-“
“They want to put him down.” Her voice interrupts you, full of urgency.
That has you sitting bolt upright. Putting down hybrids has been illegal for years now and the center mostly adheres to those laws. Mostly, not always and when they don’t they usually have a damn good reason not to.
Working at a government managed rehabilitation center for hybrids meant that sometimes they put their decisions above the law.
You’re already out the bed and stumbling around the room while trying to get dressed one handed.
“I’m coming. Anything I should know?”
You tuck the phone between your shoulder and your ear so you can use both hands to pull on your pants. The short pause strains your nerves. She wouldn’t have called you if the others could handle whatever was happening.
“Liz?” You prompt her.
“Belgian Malinois hybrid. Military. They found him after he was MIA for moths. Severely malnourished, signs of torture all over him. No idea how they managed to get him into a chopper and bring him here, but he is here.” She rattles down and if you didn’t know her better you’d think that she doesn’t care. But you do know her better. Staying professional helps her not to break down with cases like this.
Hectically you tuck a shirt over your head, gather your things and basically run out the door. When you started working at the center you moved as close as possible to your new workplace and because you were lucky that meant living just down the street.
Running along the sidewalk you urge her on. “What more, Liz. I need everything you can give me.”
The silence speaks volumes. She hesitates, then goes on.
“He attacked and killed one of the soldiers that brought him here. They sedated him but said if no one wants to work with him, they have to put him down. I’ve seen hybrids go animal before but not like this.”
You grit your teeth at that. You hated the term ‘going animal’ even if it was a widely accepted term when working with hybrids. Just because they we’re genetically part animal didn’t mean, that them going berserk was less human that an ordinary person losing it.
And if what she told you was true, he had more than enough reason to lose his marbles.
Before you can ask another question you reach the fence of the rehab compound and to your surprise Liz is there, already opening the door for you so you won’t have to use your access card. You end the call and pocket your phone when you approach her.
“I want to say it’s good to have you back but the circumstances make the whole thing slightly less cheery.” She greets you and then engulfs you in a heartfelt hug.
Damn, you missed her. Liz didn’t work with the hybrids as a handler. She was part of the office team but she was one of your favorite coworkers here. Liz got shit done while taking none and still she was the nicest, sweetest person around.
You nod, returning her hug. Then you breathe deeply, preparing yourself to actually step foot into the facility again. The very reason why you were on medical leave in the first place. It doesn’t feel as bad as you feared but you’re not sure how you will react to the hybrid.
“Where is he? What’s his name?”
Liz sighs deeply. “He’s in the cell. The others refused to work with him when they heard the details from the soldiers. Honestly, I don’t blame them but I thought it was worth calling you.”
You nod grimly and let her lead the way. The facility worked with aggressive hybrids a lot. Problematic cases were nothing new. But one who had murdered mere hours ago was new territory. You’re not sure this is the best decision.
Was this the kind of case you were ready to come back for? After what happened? This had the potential to ruin any progress you had made during your leave.
No. You couldn’t let him be put down just because you were scared. He deserved a chance and if all the others were too worried then you’d give him the chance. Even if it might cost you the stability you’d gained back.
Liz comes to a halt before the cell and turns to you. Her hands clasp onto your shoulders, looking at you through her glasses.
“Thank you for trying.” She hesitates briefly. “Don’t destroy yourself over it though. If he’s lost, he’s lost. You can’t save everyone.”
Her words make your throat tighten and swallowing seems like an impossible feat. You nod, despite the unease bubbling up in you.
He’s a person, you remind yourself. It’s not like you’re meeting a wild animal.
Finally you turn to look through the small window into the cell. The large hybrid nearly steals your breath. He’s still unconscious, lying on the mattress at the far end of the otherwise unfurnished cold cell. The dark pointed ears that peek out of his shaggy hair twitch every now and then.
“His name?” You ask again, your voice a whisper, even though you’re not entirely sure why you feel the need to quiet down.
He is dirty beyond belief; his hair unkempt and you can make out a slight beard on his strong jaw through the bars of his muzzle.  You grind your teeth at the sight of it. Using muzzles of that type on hybrids has also been forbidden and you wonder if they found him like this or put it on him.
The fact that he doesn’t wear a shirt, only ripped and sullied pants, grants you an unobstructed view of his torso. There are various wounds in different phases of healing and his ribs are overly visible beneath his skin.
The twin wounds on his left draw your eyes. They seem almost circular and are located between his ribs. Already crusted over messily they seem to not be the newest ones; still you shudder with how painful they look. Over the ribs that lay between those wounds the skin is blackish blue and bruised.
You decide to not look closely at his other wounds as to not make you feel shakier than you already do. Instead you look at his face again. That too is covered in shallow cuts but those do not make your insides want to turn over.
His hair seems to be a deep, dark brown, matching the ears and you wonder how he’ll look, once he’s clean and not on the brink of starvation. Liz’ voice interrupts your thoughts.
“Simon Riley. Lieutenant.”
You both know rank means almost nothing when it comes to hybrids but you don’t comment on the information. You’re about to ask something else when he starts stirring and you hold your breath. Even though you’re outside you feel the tension rise along with his consciousness from the artificial sleep.
Two figures, that were obstructed from view before because they stood so close to the wall, step forward. Soldiers, you realize and they have their weapons trained on the slowly waking hybrid. On Simon.
As soon as he’s halfway conscious he scrambles to his feet, slightly swaying in his spot. He tries to bring his arms to the front but they seem to be tied behind his back. His tail grows stiff behind him, the ears tilt back and his upper lip curls into a snarl revealing his canines while his eyes fixate on the soldiers.
You can hear his deep resounding growl through the door and everything in you wants to run. This is a military hybrid, all right. Everything about him is big and intimidating, the aggression rolling off of him in waves along with the resounding growl.
Instead of running you set your shoulders and breathe deeply. “Let me inside and get the soldiers out.” You say a lot more confidently than you feel. Evidently their way of handling him is not working.
Liz raises her eyebrows but communicates with the guards inside. Slowly they back towards the door, keeping their guns pointed at the hybrid while Liz unlocks the door. Quicker than you can comprehend you changed positions with one of the guards, the other staying with his gun still pointing at Simon.
“”Out.” You command. You wish your body was as unwavering as your voice but you can feel a subtle shaking start in your legs.
The soldier seems conflicted but Elizabeth keeps the door open and he backs out too. Everyone at the center knows that working with hybrids comes with a lot of risks. If this goes south all you’ll be is a small stack of papers on Liz’ desk, waiting to be signed. And maybe a body to be buried.
You’re alone with him now, the heavy door closing behind you and the hostility rolling off Simon nearly suffocates you. His eyes are now fixed solely on you and he seems to be weighing his options, every muscle in his body coiled tight, ready to attack you.
You pray that he doesn’t.
You study him for a moment longer and you see the sheen on sweat that appears on his skin. This is not only aggression. He’s scared. Scared of you and somehow the fear being mutual calms you down. This hybrid must have been through hell and now he woke in a strange room after forcefully being sedated. You’d be scared shitless too and growl at people.
“Hello.”
You hold the eye contact and the way his ears perk forward for a second before going back again would be adorable in any other situation. The growl stutters before returning stronger than before. He reacted to being spoken to. Liz’ had exaggerated, maybe they’d misinterpreted him, because this hybrid was not on a murder spree.
Yet he’d killed earlier, you have to remind yourself. Just because you were a softie didn’t mean he’d spare you.
Slowly you raise your hands. “I’m just going to sit down, here. Do you know where you are?”
You can see the confusion on his face at the fact you talk to him and you mentally curse the soldiers that brought him in. Despite his display being more animalistic than human he is still a person before all else. How come they hadn't had the common sense to talk to him?
His keen eyes don’t miss even one of your movements as you settle down and cross your legs.
“You were found just north of the border in Texas.” It’s difficult to keep your voice as soft as possible with the way your throat is so tight. For a second you hate yourself because you’re thankful that he is muzzled and his arms are restrained.
Then you remind yourself that he is not Phillip and despite what Liz told you, you will judge him based on his behavior not on the stories. Like you should have with Phillip.
Something about what you said makes his ears perk up. He’s still careful but the previous stifling aggression is gone. Once again you try to suppress your anger at the soldiers not talking to him. This isn’t nearly as bad as they made it out to be.
“They brought you to a rehabilitation facility for hybrids that work with the authorities or the military. You might have heard of it before. It’s called “Rehybrid” which is a stupid name if you ask me but I wasn’t born when they decided on that so…”
Now he cocks his head at you and you try to keep from smiling. You know you’re rambling but it seems to help so you keep going.
“Not everyone is gifted in name giving.” Without much of a pause and consciously casually you continue on. “Mind if I take the handcuffs off of you?”
That makes him stiffen, reflexively his lip curls up again a small growl starting up. Of course he doesn’t trust you. But you’re also very aware of how unfair it is to have him shackled and muzzled when he feels threatened already.
“I know. I wouldn’t want anyone near me too if I were in your position but I think it would only be fair.” You’re very aware of the fact, that Liz, and the soldiers probably too, are watching through the window, most definitely thinking you’ve lost your mind.
Simon shakes his head and even if it is disappointing it makes you feel incredible that he interacted with what you said. Your chest expands and you suddenly feel like a big boulder lifted off your shoulders. That’s a good start.
“It’s okay, I won’t do it then. Just give me a sign when you’re ready.”
Once again you briefly glance at the state his body is in and you slightly wince. Yeah, maybe you would have to press a little harder.
“Listen. I really want to give you the time and space but I think your wounds and your body are on slightly tighter schedule than I am. I won’t force you but I don’t want you dying on me.”
His eyes widen at that and in that moment you’d pay to know what he’s thinking. It’s interesting to watch him as he seems to mentally take note of his body. He nods at you and you breathe a sigh of relief.
“Take the cuffs off?”, you ask again just to be sure. Simon nods again.
Keeping it slow and easily predictable you stand up again and raise your hand to the latch in the door, opening it and sticking your hand through it. If Liz and the soldiers listened, they’ll give you the key, hopefully.
For a few agonizingly long heartbeats nothing happens, then a key is dropped into the palm of your hand and you close the latch again.
“I’m going to take a step towards you and then you can come to me. Sound good?”
Simon nods again and you take the step. His body tenses but then he crosses the small space and turns his back to you. His chest is heaving and his back is damp with cold sweat. It’s almost unnerving the way he has his head tilted as far to the side as possible, watching you out of the corner of his wide eye. If you make one wrong move he could still easily put you on the ground.
This close you can smell him and the stench coming off of him almost makes you gag. You try to breathe through your mouth at the smell of something rotten assaulting your nose. There's also the underlying smell of piss and filth along with other scents you can't identify. You concentrate on the task at hand in order not to imagine what might have happened to him.
Trying not to stress him out more, you talk him through the short process of taking off the handcuffs. His fast breathing makes you slightly worried that he’ll hyperventilate.
The moments the cuffs are on the floor he’s on the other side of the room again and his hands are tearing at the muzzle on his head. His fingers are frantic and a nail on his already damaged hands breaks, a little bit of blood welling up.
“Wait, please!” You call out desperately but his movements only grow more hectic. The muzzle he has on is designed so the hybrid is unable to take it off without seriously injuring themselves. His nimble fingers flit all over the piece, grabbing and tugging until he decides to just start pushing it upwards off his face.
Immediately the metal cuts into his cheeks and you know he’ll do it anyway. He doesn’t care about cutting his skin in the process. Panic swells in your chest at the thought of him shredding his face just to be muzzle free.
“Please, Simon, Stop!” You say desperately in a last attempt before he pulls it off his face. Against everything you expected he freezes, eyes going wide.
“Simon, that’s your name, right?”, you question your hands outstretched as if you could keep him from hurting himself further by sheer force of will.
You’re shaking and you know he can see it. Swallowing is almost painful. “Please don’t hurt yourself, I’ll take it off of you but please stop hurting yourself.”
His eyes narrow but this time he hesitates less before nodding and stepping towards you. God he is big. You’re all too aware of how incredibly vulnerable you are right now. He could probably rip you apart with his bare hands if he wanted to.
He’s a fully trained soldier and you… you’re just an ordinary person who helps hybrids to get back on their feet. You specifically chose this line of work because you’re soft and stupidly selfless. Using those traits for work seemed like a good option to turn them into strengths.
Now you’re all too aware of how little your softness would guard you against Simon’s brute strength. Even on the brink of starvation the fact that he’s a weapon remains.
Achingly slow your hands reach up to the muzzle, feeling along it for the mechanism to unlock. His eyes stare into yours and this close you can see that they’re the color of dark honey. Nothing about the expression in them is sweet though and you have to consciously swallow against the lump forming in your throat.
You unlock the mechanism and Simon stays in your personal space for a second longer. You don’t break the eye contact and slowly he moves backwards until there is enough room to breathe between you two again.
He flexes his jaw for a moment to test it and this time you smile. His eyes narrow at that but you don’t let it deter you.
Until now he hasn’t made a move to hurt you and you decide to introduce yourself. When you tell him your name he still doesn’t answer but he’s attentive and you think that maybe it will be fine after all.
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libraford · 1 year ago
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Okay so here's what's going on with the bird crimes.
On thursday I was going to Powers Park when I saw what I thought were 2 chickens hanging out in the parking lot, and a lady watching them from the fence. I thought... they could belong to the lady, but chickens aren't the kind of pet that you just let hang out loose.
I approach.
Lady: "These aren't mine."
I look closer. Its actually 2 roosters, one of which is a very small breed and is missing his tail feathers. Both of them have an injury to their backside- like its been plucked.
So we talk about what to do, I end up calling Animal Control. The actual Animal Control officer doesn't get there until noon, I get a police dispatcher. She says she can send one of the cops to grab them until the actual professional gets there.
I tell her that the roosters are being kept by the woman I met, she's coaxing them into her house.
I post about it on the facebook group in case someone knows who they belong to. The comments are full of jokes, obviously. But no leads. Eventually the big rooster gets caught by someone running a sanctuary for abandoned and abused livestock, but they're still looking for the little black one. Evidently they got out of the lady's backyard and were loose again.
I figure he's going to be a coyote snack and don't think about it for the rest of the week.
So now it is Sunday and I'm opening up the bathrooms. I'm at Summit Grove park and as I'm about to reserve the shelter for a birthday party I see...
A black pigeon.
Pigeons are not a common animal in this area- you're more likely to see house sparrows, crows, and mourning doves. So that's odd. What's more, she doesn't seem to be skittish and is definitely accustomed to humans. And she keeps trying to bite my fingers, so she associates hands with food and she's skinny as a rail so she's been abandoned for a minute.
Why does this keep happening to me? Is this the Morrigan come to teach me a lesson in pigeon form?
So I remember the number of the woman running the sanctuary and I give her a call. I tell her I've got a pigeon here that can't fly, is super hungry, and doesn't seem to have any issues biting fingers. She says she can't take her, but she can find a home for her because pigeons have specific needs. But she won't be able to get there until 12:30. We (my work partner and I) have to deal with the bird in the meantime.
We absolutely cannot take this bird with us on our route because we are in a tiny truck cab and don't have a cat carrier to put her in. So our solution is to lock her in the janitor's closet until the rep can get here.
Around 12:15, we head back to the shelter to make sure she's still there and hasn't been disturbed... and I realize that the reason I even saw her in the first place...
...was because there was supposed to be a birthday party at the shelter at noon.
The party is strongly underway and they have shoved a table against the door of the closet.
The sanctuary lady comes by and waves, we ask the party people politely to move the table slightly because we're trying to rehome a pigeon that's inside that closet.
They move the table, but not all guests see this interaction- because it looks like a bunch of maintenance people are just here to boss folks around during a little girl's birthday party and this draws a crowd.
The sanctuary rep arrives and we open the door just a little bit to let the bird out. She bobbles towards us, hoping for food, when one of the older ladies at the party exclaims:
"Does that ANIMAL just LIVE in there?!"
I mean... sure. For the past few hours, she did live in there.
"Do you have any IDEA how many DISEASES pigeons carry?"
The rep scoops the pigeon into her arms and takes her out of the shelter area to inspect her wings, feet, and back. She shows us her breastbone and explains that its been several days since the bird ate anything, which was why it was going for fingers.
Meanwhile, Aunt Ornithophobia over here: "I can't BELIEVE you would just TOUCH a BIRD like that in front of CHILDREN!"
We take the bird away to the van so the rep can thank us and explain what likely happened- which is that someone abandoned the bird when they couldn't take care of her anymore they just let her loose.
"I understand you got one of the roosters," I said.
"Yes, the big one. But the little bantam rooster is very fast- he darted into someone's backyard and I never found him again. If you see him, give me a call."
"I've been told that chickens are legal to own here, but roosters are not."
She gets an exasperated look on her face. "If you're going to allow backyard chickens, you're going to have to allow roosters. It's impossible to sex an avian chick and they don't get their dimorphic traits until they've reached the young adult stage and chick sellers don't care about whether they're a hen or a rooster. They care about the sale. We get roosters more often than egg-layers because someone sold them a male as a female and they don't want to pay the fine. I'd rather have the laws allow both, or neither. But disallowing roosters is patently stupid."
"Hm. Well. Note to self."
"Anyways, you're heroes to this little rock dove and I want you two to know that. She's going on a trip to a bird sanctuary in Toledo where she'll have lots and lots of snacks to eat that aren't fingers."
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katakaluptastrophy · 10 months ago
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I want to continue pushing my 'Magnus Quinn wasn't actually a terrible swordfighter' agenda.
Obviously, he wasn't on the same level as professional duelists Babs or Pro, or soldiers Marta or Jean. He was a guy who did some kind of fencing in high school and then picked it up again in his 30s, presumably with some degree of seriousness.
When Gideon joins the other cavaliers in the training room, Magnus and Jean are sparring. He jokes about how badly Jean is beating him, but he must have some degree of competence for aspiring soldier Jean to find him worth training with. Babs then mocks him for getting beaten by a teenager and Magnus jokes, describes himself as "absolutely no good", and praises Jean's abilities...before giving Babs such a death glare he gets obviously embarrassed.
It's worth bearing in mind that there's some degree of tension between the Third and the Fifth. Babs will have know Magnus since he was small and has almost certainly seen him fight before. But the Fifth, their relationship, and the relative freedom that Magnus has to not be a perfect fighter (because his necromancer values him as a human being) is clearly something that rankles the Third. In TUG, when Ianthe talks about Babs, she explicitly references Abigail and Magnus. And what's interesting is that she makes a comparison not just between Abigail's husband-with-a-sword and her perfect tool to be moulded and used, but also to Corona's aspirations to swordcraft:
IANTHE (Playing a card) She’s not here, so let me be fully honest, Sextus: my sister is not a swordswoman. She loves to wear big boots and wave a sword around, and she looks wonderful doing it, but her actual competence … well, put it this way: she’d lose to Magnus Quinn.
PALAMEDES Magnus Quinn was a cavalier primary.
IANTHE No, I mean Magnus Quinn now.
There's...a lot...to unpack here: the comparison of Corona to the husband-cavalier is intriguing in and of itself on a psychosexual level, as is the contradiction between Ianthe and Corona's own versions of Corona's competence. But Palamedes' response is also interesting, suggesting that Magnus was up to an acceptable standard for a cavalier, which Ianthe's joking response seems to back up.
So Babs' rudeness towards Magnus and Jean may have a lot to do with the internal dynamics of his own necromancer-cavalier relationship and not necessarily be an accurate reflection of Magnus' abilities.
Likewise, Judith's comment in the Cohort Intelligence Files that the Fifth is 'undoubtedly chagrined" to have "schoolboy fighter" Magnus representing them had to be read against the fact that we know from the Sermon on Necromancers and Cavaliers by Second House stooge M. Bias that the Cohort has a very low opinion of unranked "social cavaliers". And Judith Deuteros may have her own reasons for being disdainful of a cavalier who is so...cavalier...about his intimate relationship with his adept.
Magnus' own self-deprecating comment on his ability is:
"I didn’t get to be cavalier primary due to being the best with a rapier. I’m cavalier primary only because my adept is also my wife. I suppose you could say that I—ha, ha—cavalier primarried!”
But again, there's a difference between becoming cavalier primary because you're the best sword fighter and getting up to a vaguely competent level once you've become cavalier primary (guys in their 30s with high powered jobs tend to be scarily into their hobbies...) He is definitely the worst cavalier there (or would be, if Pro were actually alive), but on a general standard he probably isn't as terrible as people like to joke.
Another important bit of context here is that all of his comments about his own ability occur in the context of Corona trying to get him to fight Gideon. The shy, silent 18 year old from the cult planet whose practice of cavaliership is generally acknowledged to mostly consist of carrying buckets of bones.
She gets paired with Magnus because they assume she's not going to be much of a fighter and Magnus - neither a professional duelist nor a soldier - would therefore be the fairest opponent. Magnus is clearly uncomfortable. And Gideon is certainly Intimidating. But when you consider that most of his previous interactions with her have been trying to coax her out of her shell and clearly feeling rather sorry for her, his comments take on a bit of a different tone.
Does Magnus worry Corona has dragged along this poor kid out of interest or curiosity, and that she's going to be humiliated and never want to interact with them again? As Corona says “Come—Gideon the Ninth, right?—why don’t you try Sir Magnus instead? Don’t believe him when he says he’s rubbish. The Fifth House is meant to turn out very fine cavaliers," Magnus is politely dissembling, telling exactly the sort of jokes that would appeal to a teenager.
As everyone else mocks or is intrigued by Gideon's knuckle-knives, Magnus is trying to look her in the eye through her sunglasses, bewildered that she doesn't know to take off her robes or glasses to fight and then...suddenly realising that she is dead serious and perhaps he has dramatically underestimated her.
After his defeat, we hear him saying to Jean "I'm not quite that out of form, am I?". Gideon's abilities were totally unexpected: she severely tests a top duelist like Babs, and Magnus is surprised to be beaten in three moves. That suggests he's been holding his own rather more comprehensively in previous sparring.
And while he certainly wasn't up to Gideon's standard, he may have managed to draw his sword before Cytherea took him out...
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vexcraft · 7 months ago
Text
also on ao3 here!
special delivery
Pearl was fairly certain this was not in her job description. 
She supposed she had agreed to do special deliveries and while she would not necessarily count this as one because there was a permit for these kinds of jobs – though she figured that since there was no transaction involved she wasn’t breaking the law and then technically this was not necessarily a job for the man with the mob permit – this was still something she would have called Scar for. If he was available that was. Which brings her to the next problem.
Scar was currently very small, very grey, and a little feathery. And also in her mailbag.
Pearl did know a little about the vex thing. Not a whole lot, it didn’t really come up all that often, but at least she knew enough to realize that the little creature she had spotted inside one of the chests of the explosive firework shop was Scar. She had noticed the chest wasn’t properly closed when she had been restocking her flower truck and she would hate it if rainwater ruined the fireworks that from what she’d heard could cost Cub more to make than he was selling them for, so she had decided to help the man out and close the chest. Only to find a very small Scar in it.
She had no idea what to do with a vex though. Especially with a vex that seemed very much to be sleeping and showing zero signs of planning on waking up any time soon. So she had carefully picked Scar up where he had been curled up in the middle of the fireworks and gently placed him in her bag, glad that she had already delivered all the mail that had been there earlier.
She was also, for once, glad that her donkey was as slow as it was. It made the journey to the one person she figured could probably help her with this issue a little more steady. Steady was what she needed right now – she didn’t trust herself to fly or even run with a literal person in her bag.
The journey took a while, and every now and then she looked into her bag to make sure everything was alright. Each time Scar seemed just as asleep as the last time and she briefly wondered if he was maybe unconscious and not just sleeping – but he seemed to be tossing and turning a little so she wasn’t too worried. Surely Cub would know what was up.
Pearl couldn’t say she was surprised she saw sculk when Cub’s area came into view. The extent of it was mildly terrifying though, especially as he resided quite close to her, but she paid it no mind. She had more important things to worry about, like finding Cub (and maybe hoping that he was not covered in sculk). 
“Cub?” she called as she got off the donkey. She didn’t have a lead and there weren’t any fence posts nearby anyway – she would just have to hope the donkey wouldn’t wander off the pathway into the sculk. “You around here?”
She heard the sound of a firework going off and quickly a rather normal-looking (aside from all the dye stains) Cub landed before her. 
“Hey hey,” Cub greeted her. “What’s up? Good to see you, Pearl.”
“I have a special delivery for you,” Pearl explained, putting on her slightly more professional mail lady voice. 
“Hmm?” Cub hummed, obviously curious. “Intriguing. I don’t remember buying anything or signing up for anything.” 
“Yeah, about that…” Pearl opened her bag and held it out enough for Cub to be able to look inside. He took a few steps forward to peek into the bag and then let out a little amused sound.
“I see, I see,” Cub nodded, reaching into the bag. Pearl winced a little as Cub picked up the sleeping vex by the scruff of his neck like one might hold a small kitten – she was certain Cub knew how to handle a vex miles better than she did but after spending the better part of the last hour being as careful as she could it did catch her off guard a little. Scar didn't seem to mind, still deep asleep. “Where did you find him?”
“He was sleeping amongst the fireworks in a chest at your shop,” Pearl said as she watched Cub cradle the vex in his arms – or rather his arm, he didn’t really need both of his arms to hold something so small. “I figured that might not have been the best place for him.”
“Makes sense, makes sense,” Cub nodded and Pearl had no idea what exactly about this was making sense to Cub, but she was glad something was. “Thank you for bringing him here, I’ll take care of him.”
Cub looked like he was about to turn around and leave to do whatever one did to care for a vex and Pearl couldn’t stop her curiosity. 
“Cub? Can I ask a question before you go?” 
The man paused. “Sure, of course,” he replied. He didn’t seem to be in a hurry which did ease Pearl’s nerves a little. “Shoot.”
"Why?” she asked and it came out a little less polite than she was hoping for. “I mean, is he like, alright? I’ve never seen that happen before. Had me a little worried there.”
Cub seemed to either not notice her tone or simply not care. “Just means he’s really tired. Like really really tired. Nothing too serious, I’ll talk to him about it.” Scar turned a little in Cub’s hold almost like he knew he was being talked about. “It happens sometimes, every now and then.”
“He’ll just be back to normal once he’s rested?” All of this was raising more questions than answering them, but she didn’t want to pry. 
“Yep,” Cub confirmed. “He seems to like sleeping in chests, not the first time he’s been found in one. I’ve never tried to put him in a shulker box, do you think I could mail him?”
Pearl just stared at him. “Please do not try to mail Scar.”
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bruhnze · 3 months ago
Note
Can you write something about Lucy dealing with adhd, or somthing with Ona too
Eres incorregible - Lucy Bronze x Ona Battle
summary: fictional story about Lucy Bronze and having adhd, this is written because multiple people had the request of such a fic.
wordcount: 2554, a little one🥺
warnings: none
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Eres incorregible
Lucy Bronze had always thrived on a fast-paced, high-energy lifestyle.
As a professional footballer, her life was a whirlwind of training sessions, matches and constant travel. She had enough new incentives every day to keep her from being bored, her job was perfect for her. Like how she got the opportunity to live in France for two years.
But when the COVID-19 pandemic struck, the world suddenly stopped and so did Lucy’s rhythm. Without the daily demands that usually kept her grounded, Lucy found herself struggling with an unsettling stillness.
In the early days of lockdown, Lucy’s restlessness took over. With no challenging workouts or team meetings to attend, she threw herself into home projects with the same intensity she brought to the pitch. She redid the entire house interior, tackled every little task she had put off while living in Lyon, and when that was done she even repainted the outdoor fence. But once everything in and around the house was in perfect order, Lucy found herself with too much time on her hands and too little to do.
With no more home improvements to make, her energy turned inward. She obsessively watched her football matches, replaying them over and over again. She studied the games, analyzing every move, every strategy, until the matches blurred together.
Desperation for new challenges led her to learn to breakdance, following how tutorials on how to stand on her head and do the worm, skills she even convinced her girlfriend at the time, Keira, to learn with her. The two of them spent hours mastering these ridiculous feats, laughing until their sides hurt, but the laughter wasn’t enough to fill the void.
Lucy tried to keep herself occupied with online campaigns and challenges, including the Nike Living Room Challenge. She worked out in the garden for hours on end, sometimes pushing herself through five-hour sessions just to stave off the boredom.
Despite all this, the days felt endless. Her usual six hours of sleep dwindled to four or five, the quiet nights stretching out. The days getting more and more repettative.
The constant boredom began to take its toll. Little irritations flared up between her and Keira. The tension simmered under the surface, small arguments breaking out over nothing, the kind of friction that only arises when two people are confined together with no escape.
During one of her weekly online meetings with her psychologist, Lucy was asked a question that she hadn’t expected: “Have you ever thought about whether you might have adhd?”.
The suggestion caught Lucy a little off guard. She had always been a bundle of energy, but she had never considered that there might be a reason behind it. The psychologist referred her to a psychiatrist, who conducted a thorough evaluation. After a few sessions, some alone, some with her parents or with Keira, the diagnosis was confirmed.
Initially, the diagnosis didn’t change much for Lucy. She didn’t feel different, but with tips and tricks the specialist offered her to manage her energy and focus, she actually delt a lot better with all of the access energy she had and got less stuck in her head.
Lucy and Keira even attended some therapy sessions together, learning how to navigate their relationship now that they had a better understanding of that side of Lucy.
Without her usual outlet of intense physical exercise, Lucy took up some new hobbies like cooking, baking, painting and even building LEGO sets. These activities helped, providing her with some sense of structure and accomplishment throughout the days.
When life began to return to normal, Lucy noticed how much daily exercise had been essential for clearing her head. With her regular training back in place, she found it easier to focus on other responsibilities, like answering emails and managing her personal life. The physical exertion also improved the quality of her sleep, and for a while, everything seemed to be falling into place.
..
However, years later, the challenges resurfaced when Lucy underwent knee surgery. Now playing for FC Barcelona in Spain, she hadn't really thought back on the quarantine period for a while, until it all started to feel a little familiar again.
Forced to take a break from football, Lucy found herself once again trapped between the walls of her home, an apartment without a garden this time, unable to channel her energy into the sport she loved.
Her girlfriend, noticed the change immediately. She and Ona had ofcourse spoken about the fact that she had adhd, but she had explained that she managed really good because she had sports as an outlet for her energy.
Ona observed Lucy climbing the walls, more restless than ever, biting her nails until they were raw. The living room had become a makeshift football dome, with Lucy watching game after game, analyzing the performances of herself and other great defenders. She even started studying the stories of up-and-coming male footballers, determined to use this downtime to improve her own game, even with her dodgy knees.
But the obsession took its toll. Lucy started skipping entire nights of sleep, her mind too wired to rest. She spent every waking hour thinking about football, neglecting everything else.
When she and Ona had dinner, Ona couldn’t help but notice that while Lucy was still physically present, her mind was elsewhere, consumed by her own thoughts. Ona didn’t mind picking up the slack around the house, doing all the choirs as Lucy was recovering, but she couldn’t ignore the growing distance between them.
One evening, Ona finally voiced her concerns. “Lucy, have you thought about talking to a professional? I’m worried about you.”
Lucy was taken aback by the suggestion, but Ona’s sincerity struck a chord. Realizing the strain her behavior was putting on their relationship, Lucy scheduled an appointment with her psychologist, who advised her to talk to the psychiatrist again. During their session, the psychiatrist suggested trying medication to help manage her adhd, explaining her behavoir was coming from the fact she wasn’t physically challenged anymore.
Lucy was hesitant. She didn’t want to take anything that might be considered a performance-enhancing drug, like Ritalin or Adderall, which could be seen as a form of doping. After discussing her options, Lucy was prescribed Atomoxetine, a non-stimulant medication.
At first, the change was remarkable.
Lucy began helping with household chores again, her day-night schedule normalized and she was more engaged in conversations with Ona. She even started going out with friends again and attending training sessions to watch and connect with the team again. It seemed like things were finally looking up.
But as the weeks went by, Ona noticed some troubling things. Like that Lucy had stopped eating breakfast, brushing it off by saying she just didn’t feel hungry in the mornings anymore. Ona felt like her once vibrant spark seemed to dim and while she no longer bit her nails, Ona missed the little sign that Lucy was feeling stressed or excited, even though she always told Lucy to stop it. Lucy had become a shadow of her former self - calm and composed, but emotionally distant.
Their physical relationship also suffered. It had been a while since they had been intimate and while Ona didn’t want to push Lucy, she couldn’t ignore the growing gap between them.
Even when Lucy had been recovering from her knee surgery, she had found ways to make their relationship work. But now, Lucy seemed uninterested, as if the medication had dulled not just her restlessness but her passion as well.
One night, as they lay in bed, Ona decided to confront the issue.
“Are you happy?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Lucy, already half-asleep, blinked in confusion. “Hm? I don’t know, yes… why?”
“You just seem a little distant,” Ona replied, turning on the bedside lamp to see Lucy’s face.
Lucy sighed, pulling Ona closer as if to shield herself from the truth.
“I don’t really feel like myself,” she admitted after a long pause. “But everything is going so much better now. I’m functioning better. Isn’t that what matters?”.
Ona sat up, her expression full of concern. “For who, Lucy? For me? Because I’d rather have you back - the real you - even if it means things aren’t perfect all the time.”
Lucy’s heart ached at Ona’s words. “I’ve been a bad girlfriend,” she said softly. “But I’m trying to do better. I can do the chores now, I’m not obsessing over football as much… I’m trying.”
“But you’re not you, Lucy,” Ona said gently. “Your emotions are dulled. I miss the happy Lucy who danced while making breakfast, the silly Lucy who made me laugh every day and kissed me. I’d rather have that Lucy back, even if it means you’re a little more chaotic.”
A tear rolled down Lucy’s cheek. “Have I not been kissing you?” she asked, her voice tinged with sorrow. “I love you, Ona. I don’t want to lose you.”
Ona leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to Lucy’s cheek. “You’re not losing me, I know you love me. And I love you too—every part of you, even the messy bits. Maybe it’s time to talk to the specialist again, see if there’s another way. I don’t care if you’re a little crazy sometimes. I just want you to be happy.”
Lucy nodded, her heart heavy but hopeful. “I’ll talk to her again. Maybe a lower dose, or… something’’.
“We’ll figure it out together, okay? You don’t have to go through this alone,” Ona reassured her, holding Lucy close, ‘’if it were up to me we ask her if you can stop taking the meds’’.
In the following weeks, Lucy worked closely with her psychiatrist to adjust her medication. She got a schedule she followed to gradually reduce the dose so that she will have the most chance to not get any symptoms from quitting.
She started dancing in the kitchen again, even if her knee wasn’t fully recovered. She found joy in the little things, cooking breakfast with or for Ona, walking their dogs Coco and Narla, and yes, even obsessing over football. But now, there was a healthy balance. She still had her intense focus, but it was tempered by the love and support of the people around her. Mostly Ona. And now, even though she’d stopped taking the medication, she seemed to be in a better headspace then before, she talked a lot with Ona, giving her a insight into all the things she found difficult, so that they could tackle them together.
Ona was really sweet and caring, she knew it was hard for Lucy to not be able to practice the thing she loved the most in the hole world and tried to be as much of a supporting factor to her girlfriend as possible.
..
One night Ona came back home, Lucy had been at the hospital today, a final check for her knee, if it was cleared Lucy could start training with the team again on Monday. She hoped Lucy had gotten good news, she had texted her about how it had been, but she hadn’t gotten a reply even though the appointment had been in the morning. A little hesitant she opened the door, afraid Lucy might’ve had bad news.
She was met with the sight of a house way cleaner than she knew she had left it. She heared soft music playing in the kitchen.
‘’Luce?’’ she kicked her shoes off and dropped her bags.
Ona stepped in to the appartment and a lovely smell of dinner that was being prepared entered her nose. She walked to the kitchen and saw Lucy stirring up some vegetables.
She smiled as she observed her for a few minutes, a happy Lucy was the best Lucy, she always loved the English defender, but on moments like these she felt her heart beating a little faster. The casually swaying her hips, the humming with the music and the fact that Lucy had been so sweet to clean the house and prepare dinner, it was perfect.
Ona walked to Lucy and wrapped herself around the taller woman from behind, her unanounced touch made Lucy jump slightly, a soft chuckle escaping her lips. “Hey, baby, you’re home,” Lucy said, her voice tender.
‘’Mhm’’ Ona hummed against the muscular shoulders, ‘’you are my home’’.
Lucy put the fire a little lower and took Ona’s hands to give her a little space to turn around, ‘’hello’’ Lucy smiled, with a loving gaze she leaned in, her lips meeting Ona’s in a gentle, affectionate kiss.
It was a kiss that spoke volumes, soft and lingering, a silent promise of comfort and togetherness. The tender pressure of their lips was complemented by the gentle brush of Lucy’s fingers against Ona’s cheek, a subtle yet profound gesture of the love and care they shared. For a moment, the outside world faded away, leaving only the warmth of their embrace and the sweetness of their kiss, which reassured them both that things were good between them.
Lucy felt a renewed sense of determination. No matter what challenges laid ahead, she knew she would face them with Ona by her side. After all, she was Lucia Tough Bronze, unstoppable both on and off the field.
With a playful glint in her eyes, Lucy pulled back slightly, looking at Ona with a mischievous smile. “Did you know I’ve won everything in life?” she asked.
Ona, catching the sparkle in Lucy’s gaze, tilted her head with a knowing smile. She had seen this look before, the blend of Lucy’s playful charm and genuine affection. “Oh? what makes you say that?” she chuckled, ready for another of Lucy’s cheesy lines.
Lucy’s smile widened as she took Ona’s hands in hers, holding them gently. “Because I have you,” she said, her voice filled with sincerity and emotion. “Honestly, I feel like the luckiest woman in the world. With you by my side, everything just feels perfect.”
Ona’s smile deepened, touched by Lucy’s words. “I love you too Lucy.”
Lucy’s expression softened as she gently cupped Ona’s face in her hands and pressed a tender kiss to her lips. “No, I mean it. You’re perfect,” she said quietly. “I love that you’ve been so patient with me, that you see and care about the real me.”
Ona leaned in and kissed the taller woman gently. “Ofcourse, speaking of caring about you, I assume things went well with the doctor?”.
Lucy’s expression clouded for a moment. “I texted you, right? Everything went well,” she said with a bright smile. “I’m back to training with the team again.”
Ona raised an eyebrow and chuckled. “Actually, no, you didn’t text me. But I’m glad to hear it was good news,” she said, giving Lucy another affectionate kiss. “I almost started missing your silly distractions.”
“Hey!” Lucy protested playfully. “They’re not silly, they make people laugh.” She pulled out her phone and began scrolling. “I swear I sent you a message.”
After a few moments, she chuckled. “Oh, I sent it to my mom instead. Oops.”
Ona shook her head with an amused smile and gently took Lucy's arms, pulling her into an embrace. She nestled her head against Lucy’s shoulder, savoring the closeness. ‘’ets incorregible’’ she chuckled.
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janeyseymour · 8 months ago
Text
Personal and Professional- pt 3
Part 1. Part 2.
An anon asked for this! There's a backyard barbecue being held, and you're a bit hesitant because no one has seen you as the alternative woman that you are outside of school. They also don't know about you and Melissa.
WC: ~2.3k
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Janine is organizing a backyard barbecue at Barbara’s house for the Abbott crew- and you are less than thrilled to be excited. It’s not that you don’t like your work crew, because that isn’t true; you’re dating one of them. It’s that you really would rather not have everyone commenting on your body and your… tasteful markings.
“C’mon, hun,” Melissa says softly as she lays with you that night. “I think it’ll be fun to let our hair down.”
“I really would rather not,” you sigh. “No one knows about my tattoos, and no one knows about us.”
“The tattoos aren’t a big deal- I think they’ll like to see that you aren’t as buttoned up as you like to play. And they don’t have to find out about us,” she smirks. “I can keep my eyes and my hands to myself when I want to- just like I do at school.”
“You came into my room today and ate me out during prep because you were too horny to focus on grading your kids’ last assignments,” you tell her.
“It takes two to tango,” she shrugs. “It was good though, wasn’t it?”
You push her off of you. “Shut up.”
“All I’m saying is, I can control myself if that’s what you’re worried about for this barbecue,” your girlfriend tells you.
So begrudgingly, you find yourself at this barbecue for the fourth of July. The redhead and you drive separately so as not to give anything away, and you arrive there far too quickly. When you pull up to the kindergarten teacher’s house, you’re impressed. You can smell the food cooking, you hear the music playing from the backyard, and you can hear your boisterous girlfriend already laughing it up with her work wife. You head into the fenced area after taking a deep breath.
“About damn time!” Melissa teases you as she winks from the pool. “I was starting to think you weren’t gonna show!”
She’s saying this to you playfully, but she really was worried you weren’t going to pull up to the party, especially since you’re arriving an hour later than her.
“I’m here, I’m here,” you chuckle nervously as you wrap your thin cardigan around your body subconsciously.
“Well what are you waiting for?” the redhead heckles you. “Grab a drink, and come on in!”
You know she absolutely loves to see you in your bathing suit, and she’s going to drool when she sees the tattoos that dance around your hips and ribcage. She won’t be able to contain herself.
“I’m actually good right now,” you chuckle. “But I’ll grab a drink. Mel, you want anything?”
“Just another beer,” she tells you.
Everyone else looks at you like you’re crazy for only asking the redhead. “Uh… anyone else?”
And that’s how you essentially become beer girl for the day. Finally, Barb has had enough.
“For the love of all things holy, Y/N,” she throws her arms in the air. “Let loose a little and show some skin! You have to dying in all those clothes!”
“I’m really okay,” you say softly as you wipe a bit of sweat from your brow.
“Sweetheart, if this is about body insecurities,” the kindergarten teacher tells you, although her words are a bit slurred at this point. “No one is going to care what you look like in a swimsuit.”
“I bet yo’ tasty ass looks a lot better in a bikini than it does in all your buttoned up outfits that match Barbara’s energy,” Ava comments.
“I’m not always buttoned up,” you roll your eyes. “I just like to maintain some sense of professionalism when I’m with coworkers.”
“You think we give a shit about professionalism?” your boss smirks. “I go out clubbin’ every weekend and see half the Abbott parents out too. Janine and Greg were out at a hookah bar and were grinding up on each other. I’ve seen Barb and Melissa get absolutely hammered at PECSA!”
“And I am known to have a few too many aperol spritzes from time to time!” Jacob cuts in.
“Come on, baby boo, show us what youse made of!” Ava goads you.
You take a deep breath before opening your eyes again. “You really wanna see what I look like outside of school?”
Melissa’s eyes widen and her brows creep up her face. You don’t shed any clothing, not yet- but you do open your bag and pull out your different jewelry. You expertly take out the clear stud in your nose to exchange it for a hoop. Your earrings are all put in. Even though it’s just a small change, you look like an entirely different person to them- all except Melissa, who loves seeing you like this. She licks her lips subconsciously.
“Damn!” Ava grins. “We got ourselves a hot little alt girl!”
You roll your eyes at that comment. “Give me a few minutes to go change, and I’ll come in the pool.”
The hostess gives you directions as to where the bathroom is, and you thank her before heading inside to change. You do before throwing your big ripped up band t-shirt overtop of your figure. If you’re going to stun them all, you might as well go all out. You tie your hair up into one of your messier buns before making sure that your ‘slut strands’ (because that’s apparently what the baby hairs that don’t make it into the bun are called) look as though they’re supposed to be there before heading back outside.
Your secret girlfriend’s eyes go wide as you make your way into the fenced in area. You swear you see the smallest droplet of drool escape her mouth as her eyes stay trained on you. 
“Happy?” you ask your work friends.
“We’d be happier if you took off the hot t-shirt,” the principal smirks as she sips her seltzer. 
With a roll of your eyes, you peel off the shirt, revealing all of the tattoos that you have.
“You have tattoos?” Janine is mesmerized.
You shrug as you slowly start to make your way into the pool. “Young Y/N mistakes.”
“They look amazing though! I’ve always wanted a tattoo, but I’m too scared that it’ll hurt or get infected or that I’ll-”
“You just have to find something that means something to you and brace yourself. And then it’s just simple aftercare. Not too bad at all.”
“Are we really gonna ignore the fact that our good little teacher is secretly an alternative hottie with a body?” Ava gestures to you wildly. “Like, damn girl. I knew you were fit, but I didn’t know you was gonna look like-”
“Enough,” you cut her off as you grab a float and situate yourself on it. You push yourself so that you’re close to Melissa, and she hangs off of your raft. “I don’t need my boss objectifying me.”
But she doesn’t get the hint- she never really does. And you can see the way that your girlfriend is getting more and more aggravated. Silently, you nudge her with your foot and shoot her a look, telling her to cool it.
You spend the afternoon in the pool before it’s time to start cooking some more food. Gerald comes out to take everyone’s orders, but you absolutely insist on helping to cook with him. It only seems right since they’re hosting, and you quite like to barbecue.
So you climb out of the pool. You can practically feel Ava’s eyes on you as your sun kissed skin glows. You wrap your towel around your body, and she’s immediately booing.
“Show that body, girl!” she tells you.
“I’m going to be grilling,” you roll your eyes. “I ain’t trying to barbecue myself.”
When you’ve deemed that you’re dry enough thanks to the sun still out and your closeness to the grill, you unwrap yourself from the towel. Ava cheers. Why is she always around? Her applause quickly dies though when you reach for your t-shirt and pull it over your head.
You continue to help Barbara’s husband, making small talk with him, when he asks you something that entirely throws you for a loop.
“So, you and Melissa?”
You look at him as though he has four heads. “What about it?”
“The two of you together or what?”
“What are you talking about?” you feign shock.
“I see the way she stares at you,” he shrugs. “And not the way that Ava is… there’s something there, even if you don’t know it yet.”
“I think you’re crazy,” you lie through your teeth.
“Barb thinks there’s something there too,” he tuts. “And that was before you revealed yourself to be little miss alt girl. Funnily enough, that’s exactly Melissa’s type.”
You roll your eyes. “We’re coworkers.”
“That ain’t stopping your boss from flirting with you,” he chuckles. “All I’m sayin is-”
“Is the food almost ready yet?” Melissa calls from her place in the pool. “And will you grab me another beer, hun?”
You don’t make a move, and Gerald laughs. “She ain’t callin’ me ‘hun’. That one’s all you.”
“Almost,” you call back. “And you just want another Yuengling?”
“Please!”
You grab the beverage, opening it up for her before making your way back towards the pool. She’s in the middle though, so you peel your shirt off again and make your way in to deliver it her.
“Body-ody-ody-ody-” the principal starts dancing, making quite a few splashes in the water.
“Ava!” Barbara tuts.
You roll your eyes as you climb back out of the pool and make your way back over to the grill, not wanting to hear how your boss will respond to being scolded. 
Dinner is wonderful, it’s cleaned up, and then you find yourself back in the pool as the sun starts to go down and the moon starts to rise. Gerald comes out to light up the tikis that they have around the outside, and he waves.
“Alrighty, I’m heading in for the night, but it was wonderful to see you all again.”
“Thank you, dear,” Barbara blows him a kiss.
That leaves you and the rest of the Abbott crew to spend some time in the moonlight together. Somehow, the conversation leads to you and the less professional side that you’ve now shown them.
“So, when did you get your first tattoo?” Janine asks you.
“Three days after I turned eighteen,” you laugh as you float alongside your girlfriend. “Got my nose pierced the first weekend I went to college. My mom was so pissed.”
“Why?” Barbara of all people asks. “It’s an expression.”
“She hates them,” you roll your eyes. “Told me if I got tattoos and a nose ring, she’d kick me out of the house… she never did.”
Melissa chuckles. “Sounds like-”
“Sounds like what, Melissa?” Barb cuts her off with a raised eyebrow.
“Sounds like our generation,” your girlfriend states quickly. She’s thankful it’s dim, or everyone would’ve seen the panicked look on her face.
“Who carees?” Ava asks. “It’s fuckin’ hot. If I had known that you were hiding all of that under your stuffy attire, damn… I would’ve been hitting on you way more.”
“Which is why I wear what I wear at school,” you deadpan.
“I mean, really… my boyfriend and I would love to-”
“Enough,” your girlfriend practically hisses.
The entire crew looks to the redhead. “What’s got your panties in such a twist?”
“Just shut up. Stop talking about her like that,” Melissa tells your group. “Or else.”
“Or else what, Melissa?” Ava presses. 
“Or else you’re gonna have to deal with Y/N’s girlfriend,” the redhead snaps. “Who just so happens to be me.”
You press your lips together in a fine line as you look anywhere but where your friends are floating around the pool.
They all immediately start questioning both you and the second grade teacher.
“What do you mean she’s your girlfriend?” a chorus of voices ask.
Only Barbara smirks. “I knew it.”
Melissa looks to you as she pulls you and your float in tight. “That’s right. Y/N is my girl, and y’all better stop ogling her before I throw youse in with the wolves at the zoo.”
“Mel,” you roll your eyes at her threat.
“I’m serious!” she hisses as she points a finger at Ava. “I know a guy who can make it happen, and I won’t hesitate to use him if you don’t stop drooling over my girl!”
“Since when has this been a thing?” Jacob asks. “If I had known you swung that way, Mel Mel… we would’ve been at Woody’s this whole time!”
“And that is why no one knew,” she rolls her eyes. “I’m past my days at Woody’s.”
“Well what about you, Y/N?” the middle school teacher asks. “You and me? Woody’s?”
“In your dreams, Hill,” you tease. “Maybe a more low key gay bar though.”
“So, when did this come about?” Barbara asks, quite interested. “I’ve been telling Melissa to go after you since you sauntered your way in- and that was before I knew you were a little alt girl- exactly her type.”
“Caught her at the grocery store one day,” Melissa shrugs. “We went out the next Monday… been together since.”
“It’s been, what? Four months?”
“Four months, two weeks, six days,” the redhead says casually. “And enjoying every moment of it.”
“Good on you,” Barbara cheers as she holds her drink in the air.
“So stop all your flirting with my girl, or there will be hell to pay, and I’ll make it look like it was an accident,” Melissa pointedly tells the group.
Ava puts her hands in the air in surrender before pursing her lips together. “What if both of you-”
“Ava!”
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vienssunshine · 1 year ago
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What do you really want, you psychopath?
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pairing: Josh Washington x fem reader nsfw word count: 6.7k content warning: blood, violence, needles, manipulation, non-con elements (nonconsensual filming, deception) author's note: My obsession with Until Dawn returns every summer like clockwork.
You hope he's doing okay.
It's the only thought sticking in your mind as you pace on the cable car platform. After everything last year, after him shutting down, not able to talk to anyone, you hope that now, a year later, things are at least better than they were. He has mentioned a therapist, so it's a little comforting knowing he's getting the professional help he needs.
You lean your hands against the wooden railing and admire the snowy landscape, trying to push Josh out of your mind. Instead, you shift your focus to Sam, because where the hell is she? Sam insisted on you both being the first ones up the mountain, but it's fifteen minutes past the time you agreed to meet and she has yet to arrive.
Your phone buzzes with a message from your friend:
"Hey! So sorry but traffic is terrible and I'm gonna be a bit. I don't want to keep you waiting out in the cold so take the cable car up and I'll see you up there!"
Turning your phone off, you sigh. Things are going to be awkward this year. Walking in with Sam would have eased your nerves about seeing everyone again, but it looks like you aren't being afforded that comfort anymore. Worse comes to worst, you can spend the evening holed up in your guest room with your favorite book.
You step into the cable car and try to ignore how the whole thing creaks and sways with the wind. The Washingtons are rich, so they must have the money to get this thing safety checked. Right?
The music you play in your earbuds somewhat drowns out the loud groans of the car as it travels up the snowy peak. Through the frosty window, you can see what looks like a blizzard rolling in. Good thing you'll be able to hunker down in Josh's cabin.
At the top of the mountain, the doors open and you see him, Josh Washington, standing alone in the snow. After all this time, the sight takes you aback; he seems to be an apparition, not fully there.
"Look what the cat dragged in," he says, hands in the pockets of his winter jacket, "Well, I guess it was the cable car, not a cat." His lazy grin is unshakable as he speaks.
"Hi Josh," you respond, fighting the smile creeping up on your face.
"Here, let me grab that for you," he says, stepping forward and helping you out of the straps of your North Face backpack. He swings it over his shoulder and beckons you up the path.
You thank him, bashful, and follow. The trail is white with snow and dimly lit, a few lanterns hanging from the fences, their wood corroded from the harsh winters before.
"So, is anyone else here yet?" you ask, pulling your gloves on. The wind feels stronger here than it did at the bottom of the mountain, it's icy and cutting into the skin of your fingers.
"Nah, the other party people aren't due for another hour or two." He leans in with an evil grin, "So it'll be just us for a while, scared?"
You giggle, pushing the man away from you, "I don't know if I'll survive all of your ultra-corny jokes, Josh."
"Yeah? Then, any requests for what they should put on your tombstone?" he asks, giving you a lighthearted push back.
"Shut up." You shake your head, smiling, before stealing a glance at your watch: 8:03 p.m. "Actually, I guess I won't have to survive for long since I'm on time. So everyone should be due soon."
"Aww, come on," Josh says, "You know they're all gonna be late."
You punch Josh in the arm and he fakes serious injury, "Don't talk about our friends like that, I trust in their punctuality. Sam, our good, timely friend even took the initiative to get us to come early."
Josh looks around in an exaggerated manner, squinting into the dark forest, "Do you see Sammy here? Or anyone else? 'Cause I don't. Face it, they're all gonna be late. Sam at least had the decency to give me a heads-up about it."
"Yeah, the traffic's terrible apparently."
"Damn, I guess she's gonna be even later then."
You furrow your brow, "What do you mean?"
"Sam told me to expect her around 9. So, if there's traffic, it might not be until like 9:30 or 10. Right?"
"Wait, when did she tell you to expect her at 9?"
"Uh...a few days ago, maybe?" Josh glances at you sideways, "Something up?"
Confused at the discrepancy between Sam and Josh's stories, you wrack your brain. Why did Sam want you to go early with her but tell Josh she was going to show up late?
You clench your fist, Sam wanted you and Josh alone. She's known you've had a crush on him for so long and has been relentless in encouraging you to go for it. This must be her fucked up way of forcing you to.
Josh studies you, still puzzled. Staring ahead, you notice the silhouette of the lodge at the end of the path. You weigh your options: should you be honest about what you think Sam is up to or just let it go?
You elect to give Sam a stern talking-to later, reassuring Josh by saying, "Ah it's nothing." You point to the cabin, "Hey, we're almost there!"
He follows your finger and gazes at the lodge ahead, "You're right, soon we can party all night long," he says with a mischievous smirk.
You lumber up the old stairs and find that the door to the lodge is unable to be opened.
"Ah, shit. The lock's frozen," Josh observes.
"Is there another way we can get in? Or get the door unfrozen? I'm not gonna lie, I am freezing my buns off out here."
Yeah, you'd like to spend more time with Josh, but not in nearly subzero temperatures.
"Now, now, you know Josh wouldn't keep a pretty girl outside freezing her buns off for long. Wait here, I have an idea."
Josh hurries off behind the lodge, leaving you on the porch, arms wrapped around your body in a fruitless attempt to warm yourself. You look around at the dark woods surrounding the cabin. It's a dense forest, filled with gnarly trees that look like they're twisting into one another in a warped dance.
A small trace of movement pulls your attention, something shifting its position in the tree line. Anxiety begins to pour into your stomach and you look around for Josh who is nowhere to be seen. Is something—or someone—out there? You step forward, placing your hands on the railing and leaning over to get a better look when the door behind you flies open.
"Honey, you're home!" Josh cries out.
"Josh!" you respond in a harsh whisper, "Keep it down!"
Josh laughs, placing his hand on the small of your back and guiding you into the house, "For who? No one is out here besides me," he points to himself, "and you," he presses his finger to your chest, right beneath your zipper.
His small touch flusters you, bringing a welcomed warmth to your cheeks. It makes you forget about whatever you saw in the woods. Must have been a bird.
He leads you into the living room and motions with a bow for you to sit on the couch. "Now, if the lovely lady would allow me, I'd adore starting a fire to warm her freezing buns."
Assuming a janky upper-class accent, you respond, "Why, of course, fine gentleman. I suppose that will suffice to toast said freezing buns."
You both laugh, and it makes you forget how cold you are. It's nice to kid around like old times. Like times before Hannah and Beth ran off into the woods and were never seen again. Things were easier then, it was easier to make jokes, easier to laugh.
You sink further into the couch as Josh piles wood into the fireplace.
"Josh?"
"Yeah?" He throws one last log in and pulls out a matchbook from his jeans.
"I'm happy to see you again. It's been a while."
"Too long," he agrees, striking and lighting the match.
You shift in your seat on the couch. "I guess I wanted to ask, are you okay?"
He freezes, and the match dies in his hand.
Shit, you went too far. What were you thinking, asking him how he is doing on the anniversary of the death of his little sisters? You begin to ramble, "Josh, I'm sorry, you don't have to answer that if you don't-"
"It's fine," he interrupts, "I'm fine."
You lean forward on the couch, "It's okay if you're not. Honestly, I wouldn't be."
He strikes the match again and lights the kindling as he talks. "I know that having our friends up here is going to help. It really means a lot to me that everyone is coming back to spend this weekend together."
The flickering flame nestled in the piled-on logs is growing in size, blossoming into a healthy, cozy fire. You can feel its warmth on your cheeks already.
Josh ambles over to the couch, sitting next to you—sitting very closely next to you. You almost scooch away, but decide to stay still.
Josh turns his body towards yours. "It means a lot to me that you came."
It's hard to keep your composure; his words feel too intimate and, god, his arm is resting on the couch behind you, one movement away from wrapping around your shoulders and pulling you close.
"Thanks, Josh," you force out, looking down at your hands. Your fingers are anxiously knotted together, a clear sign that your body is short-circuiting at his proximity.
He follows your gaze, watching you fidget in your lap. He then moves in, resting a hand on yours to quiet your restless fingers and placing the other beneath your jaw, using his knuckle to gently move your chin up so you face him.
You're freaking out. This is crazy. Why is he touching you like this?
"I-uh...well..." you stammer.
"Do you like me?" he whispers.
You freeze up; what do you even say to that? There's no way you can tell him you've had an embarrassingly unmanageable crush on him since the day you met. It could blow up the entire friendship. But, it's possible that he feels the same way you do, isn't it? His face is mere inches from yours!
Unless he doesn't feel the same way. After countless cruel and mean-spirited pranks, this friend group has sown distrust into every fiber of your body. You want to trust Josh with your true feelings, but can you?
Your mouth gapes, unable to articulate the paralyzing swirl of desire and fear coursing through you.
So you stay silent, and he retreats from your personal space, leaning back against the couch cushion, "Don't worry about answering now, I have a feeling everyone will know each other a lot better after tonight."
Your brow furrows at the crypticness of his statement, but before you can think about it too much, Josh's phone vibrates, and he gives you a knowing smirk, "Speak of the devil."
He gets off the couch and answers the phone while you try to keep your brain from spinning out of control. He was so close to you, which was really scary, but at the same time, it felt really good.
Josh teases the recipient on the other line about Ashley, so you take a guess that he's speaking to Chris.
He ends the phone call and turns to you, "Gotta go pick up the kids at the end of the trail, wanna come with?"
You press your lips together, "Um, I think I'll hang back. Y'know, unpack and stuff."
"Suit yourself," he shrugs, grabbing a flashlight and exiting the cabin.
Still in a daze, you head down the dark hallway and find your guest room. You unpack your clothes into the wooden dresser and throw your diary onto the patchwork quilt atop your bed. The bedroom is a familiar space to you, but it doesn't bring the comfort familiarity typically does.
You take some time to journal out your feelings, trying to work out the complex emotions that come with being back at this lodge after last year. Then, you take some time to write about Josh. How he had possibly come on to you tonight. How you wanted it to go further.
Voices begin to fill up the halls, so you leave your bedroom and journal to join everyone out in the living room. The fire is now roaring and Sam has arrived, so you go to greet her.
You expected everyone to be making an effort to get along considering the reason you're all up here, but since Josh has to separate Jess and Emily by sending Jess and Mike to the guest cabin, it's clear that no one is putting in the work.
The rest of the group swiftly and awkwardly disperse, each couple running off to deal with something whether it be finding a lost bag or a Ouija board. Whether they're making excuses so they don't have to stick around, you don't know, but it hurts to realize that your friend group will probably never recover from last year.
For a moment, Josh looks defeated, but he quickly plasters on his usual devil-may-care smirk.
Sam heads upstairs for a bath, but not before you pull her aside and whisper-shout about her audacious set-up. She laughs it off, and you both agree she can make it up to you with a card game in your room after she washes off.
Still feeling weird about Josh and the exchange earlier, you elect to read in your room instead of hanging out with him. Only, when you go back to the guest room to grab your book, you can't find it in your bag. What you don't notice is how your journal has also disappeared from its place on top of your bed.
"Hey, Josh?" You walk back into the living room to see Josh as well as Chris and Ashley sitting in front of a Ouija board, "Oh hi, Chris, Ashley. Have any of you seen my book?"
"There's a bunch of books around here," Chris shares unhelpfully.
Josh turns toward you, "What does it look like?"
You position your hands to give them a visual aid, "About this big? Green? Signed by the author on the inside?"
Your friends stare at you, blank, and you let your hands fall to your sides.
"Are you sure you packed it?" Ashley asks.
"Yes, I'm sure, and it's special so I really need to find it."
"Maybe it fell out when we were walking up?" Josh suggests.
"Ugh. You're probably right. I'm gonna go check," you say, zipping up your coat.
"I'll go with you," Josh offers, about to stand up before you say, "No, it's...it's fine."
"Are you sure you don't want some alone time with Josh?" Chris teases. Ashley laughs a little too hard.
With a grin, Josh adds on, "What if there are some baddies out there?"
You offer a weak smile, "I'll be fine. Like you said, there's no one else up here but us this weekend. Besides, Emily and Matt are down there getting a bag or whatever."
"Okay," Josh says, throwing his hands up in defeat.
You take a flashlight and head down the trail, squinting as the snow comes down heavier and heavier. After following your friends' footsteps all the way down the path, you spot your book on the bank of a narrow creek a little ways off the trail. You're not sure how it got there but are just happy to have it again.
Brushing off the light dusting of snow atop the book's cover, you're pleased to realize that the weather hasn't damaged the book at all. You're less pleased when you hear an arguing couple headed your way. You silently curse; you had hoped to make your journey as short as possible to avoid this dysfunctional pair.
They turn the corner and Matt sees you, calling out your name with a wave. Emily stares ahead with her arms crossed.
"Hey, guys!" you respond.
They walk up to join you, but your presence doesn't make an impact as they continue bickering all the way back up to the lodge. You succeed in tuning them out until Chris and Ashley appear out of the snowfall.
Your mouth falls open as you take the scene in: Ashley is curled into Chris's chest and her clothes are soaked with blood.
You hurry over to them, "Are you guys okay? What happened?"
Emily gasps, "Ashley, whose blood is that?"
Ashley lets out a strangled sob, clinging onto Chris.
"Chris, what happened?" Matt asks.
"J-Josh," Chris chokes out.
You take a step forward, "Josh what, Chris?"
"He's gone. It's all my fault. There's...there's a psycho on the mountain."
His words are like cold hands that squeeze your heart. There's no way.
"What did you say?" Emily cries, "There's like a serial killer up here?"
Ashley begins sobbing uncontrollably, "Yes! There's a killer and he's gonna kill us all if we don't get out of here!"
"It's okay, it's all gonna be okay," Matt says, and he turns to Emily, "We need to get help."
"But Sam," you interrupt, "Sam's still at the lodge!"
"You're right," Chris says, "We need to get everyone back together first."
"But we also need help!" Emily says, "If there's some psycho up here, I'm not just gonna go back and run into his arms!"
"Here," you say, "You and Matt go get help while Chris, Ashley, and I go back to the lodge to get Sam and everyone else."
"Fine!" Emily responds, "But we need to go, now!"
You split off into your separate directions. Ashley and Chris decide to check the upstairs bathroom while you hurry to check the guest rooms.
You fly down the hallway, opening and searching all the rooms lining the corridor. When you get to your room, you close your eyes and crack open the door, praying that when you open your eyes, your friend will be there, cards in hand, ready to play your make-up game.
"Sam?" you cry out. Nothing.
You check the closet and under the bed, thinking she could be hiding but still come up empty.
You're about to turn around to go check the rest of the rooms when a large hand clamps around your mouth, slamming your back into a hard chest so another arm can ambush you, wrapping around your waist and holding you still.
"Looking for your friend?" a distorted voice asks. Your eyes widen. Shit. This must be the psycho Ashley and Chris were talking about.
You begin to thrash against the body behind you, desperate to do anything to avoid whatever fate Josh had suffered. Your fight does nothing but make the arms around you constrict, the strength of the maniac locking you in place, pressed against their body.
"I wouldn't be difficult, if I were you," the voice states, and you're frightened into compliance when the maniac presses a syringe of mystery liquid up to your neck. You whimper against his glove.
"Now, now, there's no need to be scared," he tucks the syringe away and begins stroking your hair, "As long as you behave, you'll be in good hands."
Tears well up in your eyes and you suppress the urge to fight back again.
He seems lost in thought for a moment as he uses his gloved fingers to play with your hair, but shortly regains his focus, "If you promise to keep quiet, I won't have to use that syringe I showed you earlier," he chuckles, the sound metallic with the voice changer, before adding, "Not that anyone would hear you or be able to help."
You gasp, are Chris and Ashley okay? Is Sam?
He looks down at you, and you can see a part of the mask he's wearing in your peripheral vision. "Can you do that for me? Be nice and quiet like a good little kitten?" As he speaks, he slowly pulls down the zipper of your coat, exposing your tight v-neck shirt.
You press your eyes shut and give a curt nod. It's best to just go along with what he says, you want to try to make it out of this alive.
The man releases the hand over your mouth, and you make an effort to keep from breaking down in tears. The psycho takes a step back and away as you manually even your breathing.
"Sit on the bed and face me," he says.
You take a few uncertain steps forward, as though you were walking on a lurching boat, and sit on the patchwork quilt, cramming yourself close to the wall behind you and pulling your knees up to your chest. You raise your chin to face your attacker and cold fear washes over you.
He's tall, built, and looks like something right out of a slasher film. He's wearing oversized overalls dirtied with dried mud and a creepy skull-like mask that covers his entire head and neck. The syringe he threatened you with pokes out of his pocket, a reminder of the consequences if you don't comply. Down by his side, his gloved hand grips a journal—your journal.
He opens your diary and begins to carelessly flip through it, "Hmmm...maybe I should tell you a bedtime story to calm you down. There's a lot of great material in here."
Your fists ball up, scrunching the fabric of the quilt beneath them. "What do you want?" you grit out. Those entries are personal, and you'd have no idea why this intruder would be interested in reading them.
Ignoring you, the psycho flips to the page you had left your bookmark in. "Look at that, a recent entry," he darkly chuckles at his discovery, "I wonder what it says."
Your lips tighten, of all entries, why did it have to be that one?
"It's nothing, just random fucking friend group shit," you say.
The psycho looks up, gazing at you for once instead of the pages in his hands. "Then you wouldn't mind me reading it, would you?"
You open your mouth, helpless, "Um, no...you don't need to-"
The maniac lumbers towards you, just a few steps away, before he begins to recite your words.
"Fuck, Josh is so hot. It's literally torture. I want to take him into one of these guest rooms and just have my way with him. I'd let him do anything he wanted too, like let him just use my body for his pleasure. Ugh, I'm getting all hot just thinking about it. It's killing me that we were literally alone, and I think he was making a move on me, but I just didn't do anything about it. But I don't know, I don't want to push it after his sisters..." the psycho trails off.
Your face burns, feeling more embarrassed than scared now, even with a potential murderer standing before you. Your words sound so much more extreme and mortifying after being read aloud. Is that what he's trying to do, humiliate you?
The psycho closes the journal, steps forward, and tosses it onto the dresser. He's close now, boots planted on the red carpet in front of the bed, just a few paces away. He's watching you, his gaze suffocating, so you avert your own, instead focusing on the area above his left shoulder.
A glint in the corner of the room, right where the ceiling meets the two adjacent walls, catches your eye.
"Nothing to say about that entry, sweetheart?" the psycho asks, standing there with his gloved hands by his side as if he has all the time in the world.
This is getting suspicious; why is he asking you about your crush instead of, I don't know, killing you? It seems like such a trivial topic for a killer to be focused on...if he actually is one. Were Chris and Ashley wrong?
You peer at the shady corner of the room and are able to make out a circular object: a black and shiny lens. Above it is a dim but steadily blinking red light. You're being filmed. With that realization, you put it together.
They're pranking you.
It started with Sam tricking you into being alone with Josh, and then Chris teasing you about him, and then Ashley and Chris putting on a hell of a show trying to convince you some psycho is running around. Now, they're trying to terrify you into confessing your feelings. It's all some stupid, immature prank where you are the butt of the joke.
A deep frown forms on your face and you unfurl your body from its curled up position on the bed. Fury begins to pulse through your body.
"Now that I think about it, I actually have plenty to say about that entry." You stand up, taking a bold stride toward the "psycho". His hand raises to the pocket the syringe sticks out of, but you continue unfazed.
"First, let me start off with the fact that I will not let you guys scare and embarrass me for your own entertainment, alright?" You're almost yelling now, and the man watches as you continue your tirade.
You stare down the camera, gesticulating wildly, "I have feelings for Josh, okay? I want to fuck Josh. Hard." You throw your hands in the air, "And you can play all these stupid little tricks you want on me but I'm not going to let you guys make me feel bad about it. I don't give a fuck about what any of you think of me."
You sigh, exasperated, and face the speechless man standing in front of you. "There you go, hope you guys got the laugh you wanted."
He observes you as you shift your weight, the creepy eyes of the mask staring uncomfortably deep into you. You fold your arms, "So you can take the mask off now, okay? The prank's over, Chris."
"It's not Chris."
You press your lips together, "Okay, then who is it, Mike?"
The psycho speaks again, but this time, the voice-changer has been turned off.
"I think you know who it is."
Your eyes widen. There's no way you just confessed to-
The psycho's gloved hands rise to his head, and his fingers hook behind his mask and bring it down, revealing Josh's smirking face.
You take a wobbly step back, your anger disintegrating and leaving you without the confidence to speak as casually as you just were.
He chuckles, amused by your surprise and confusion. "This isn't how I imagined this going, but I'm not complaining about it." He places his mask next to your journal that's on top of the dresser.
A million thoughts and feelings begin swirling around your head and body at a vertigo-inducing pace, but they are all quieted when Josh steps forward and takes your hands in his gloves.
"Josh, what...what's going on?" you ask meekly, "Where is everyone?" It feels so contradictory, but knowing it's him near you, with his hands in yours, makes you feel so safe.
"I set up a few games for them," Josh says, "They should be entertained for a bit. But yeah, it's all one big prank. Gotcha!"
It feels like he's holding back a full reply. You look up at him, searching his green eyes for a complete answer, only to be met with a warm rush to your stomach at the fact that his gaze is soft, loving, and entirely focused on you. It's easier to fall into his warm embrace than insist on knowing more about the stupid prank, so you choose to just let it go.
Josh looks down and away, “Y’know, I’ve always been into you. I’m not good with this kind of thing but…I’ve always wanted to ask you out. I never got the courage to tell you that until now.”
Your heart flutters. “I was scared to tell you too, I just didn’t know how you’d react given…everything.”
He nods, “It feels like sometimes it takes a life-or-death situation to get people to confess their true feelings. Like Chris and Ashley, it’d take a gun to their head to get either of them to spill their guts.” 
“You’re probably right,” you giggle. 
Josh leans closer to you, hands moving from yours so they can rest on the curve of your waist. His thumbs slowly stroke your sides, provoking the urge to move his hands underneath your shirt to feel the sensation unobstructed. 
“So,” he starts, his voice quieter, dripping with something darker, “Was everything you wrote in your diary true?” 
You bring your arms up so they’re around his neck, pressing your body into his. Your soft chest melds into his hard sternum and heat radiates through his overalls to warm your skin. 
You tilt your head so your lips are centimeters from his, “You mean how I wrote pages upon pages of how bad I wanted to fuck you?” 
His hands tighten, squeezing your waist, and with his chest so close to yours, you can feel his heartbeat speed up at your words. 
“Fuck,” he says, “I guess I didn’t know you wanted it as much as I have.” 
You lean forward, closing the gap between your lips and kiss him, hard. You melt into each other, bodies fitting together like puzzle pieces, devoid of any negative space. One of his hands comes up to your jaw and the other travels to the small of your back, pushing you further into him. 
Threading your fingers into his hair, you deepen the kiss, parting your lips and allowing your tongues to push into each other's mouths. He’s a little hesitant at first, but any self-consciousness vanishes when you begin to moan breathily into your open-mouthed kisses. Thoroughly encouraged by your noises of delight, he indulges in his desire, indulges in you.
His kisses are becoming messy and desperate as he works to keep receiving your pretty little noises. He runs his hands all over your body, feeling every dip and curve, wanting to touch all of you at the same time. Each brush of his hands sends tingles up your spine and you move with him, desiring nothing more but to keep your body underneath the palms of his hands.
You allow your hands to explore too, taking them downward, past the buttons of his shirt, the large pocket of his overalls, and his belt until they reach the hardness in his pants. You rest delicate fingers on it, tracing the outline and Josh breaks from your kiss to groan. 
You let out a shaky breath, “Shit, Josh. I want this. I want you.” 
He leans down and grabs the backs of your thighs, hoisting you up and against him. Now suspended, you tighten your arms around his neck, holding onto him. Josh lays you down on the quilt and you spread your body out, relaxing into the soft fabric and the euphoric buzz your body swims in. He crawls on top of you, pressing a kiss to your jaw, then your neck, and finally, to your collarbone all while you giggle and pull him close.
He hovers over you, “You know where I want to take you right?”
You laugh and point your finger into his chest, “Don’t you dare say that perverted phrase.” 
He smiles, bringing his hand up to his mouth to lock his lips and throw away the key. 
He begins to kiss your neck once more, and you squirm underneath him, overwhelmed by the sensation his warm and wet lips shock through your body. His shirt’s sleeves are rolled up, so you wrap your hands around his thick forearms to stabilize yourself. 
Josh moves the neckline of your t-shirt, kissing further down on the increasingly exposed skin. Each kiss sends heat blooming deep in your stomach, making it even harder to keep still with the waves of pleasure overtaking you. His fingers tug on the hem of your t-shirt, a silent ask for removal. You’re about to comply when the shine of the camera in the corner catches your eye once more, the lens trained directly on the bed. 
“Josh, the camera?” you ask. 
“Not on,” he mumbles, entranced by the sight and feeling of your chest. 
It’s enough reassurance for you to pull your coat and shirt off, uncovering your bra and torso. Your exposure gives you a sudden wave of self-doubt about the prank pulled on you and everyone's role in it. You still have questions since some things aren’t fitting together, but, shamefully, it’s hard to think critically when Josh’s lips feel so good against you. 
“Fuck, y’know you’re so pretty?” Josh whispers into your torso, lavishing your chest with kisses and licks as he worships your body, “All of our winter trips…s’been so hard to focus with you here. Just wanted to touch you.”
Your fingernails begin to dig into his forearms. “It was so hard for me too, Josh, I’ve had a crush on you for like ever.” He kisses just above your jeans and you let out a gasp. Your hand comes up to your mouth in an attempt to muffle your noises, but Josh pins your wrist to the bedspread. 
“Please,” he says, “I want…to hear you,” he presses another kiss to your pelvis, “I’ve been wanting to do this for so long.” 
“Okay,” you answer, breath hitching as he unbuttons your pants. He pulls your jeans off and throws them onto the rug. “Mmm, no fair,” you whine, using your free hand to knock one of his overall straps off his shoulder. He smiles, complying with your wishes by taking his overalls off, leaving him in his button-up and dark jeans. 
“Is this satisfactory for the princess?” he asks, waiting for you to evaluate his outfit. 
You tilt your head and grin, “Hmmm…satisfactory for now.” 
“Then, may I continue pleasuring my fair maiden?”
“You may,” you giggle. 
He kneels between your thighs and strokes his fingers along the curves of your legs, marveling at your beauty. 
“You have such a tight bod,” he says, breathless. He places a big hand on your lower stomach, “And so soft, too.”
A shy smile spreads across your face; the words from your crush make you feel tingly and giddy. “It makes me happy that you like my body,” you respond. 
“I love it,” he says, bending your knees and pressing a kiss to your inner thigh, amused by how you instinctively jerk at the sensation. “You like when I kiss you there?” he asks, already knowing the answer. 
Your breathing becomes uneven as he kisses further down your inner thigh, closing in on your underwear and the darkened patch where your wetness has soaked through the fabric. Josh’s rough hands slip down your thighs, holding them open and still despite the way you squirm when his lips feel a little too good. 
He pauses for a quick moment to pull off his shirt, leaving him in his dark henley top that hugs his lean build perfectly. 
“I want more off of you,” you demand, and Josh grins, stating that “Somebody’s eager.” 
His henley top comes off and shirtless Josh is between your legs once more, kissing just a few inches shy of your underwear. His hands roam as he does, gratefully squeezing the flesh of your thighs. 
He moans your name as he licks a stripe across the inside of your leg, sending the thoughts straight out of your brain. All you know is that he sounds so fucking hot when he moans your name. 
“C-can I take these off now?” he asks, placing a hand on your underwear, a twinge of desperation underlying his voice.
“Yes, please, Josh,” you gasp, thumbs already tucking into your waistband to get the burdensome fabric off as quickly as possible. 
He groans as your glistening folds are exposed, looking like he’s about to come just from the sight of you. Within seconds he’s nestled between your legs again, kissing your thighs until he gets to your soaked entrance. His hot breath fans against you, sending butterflies of anticipation up your sides. 
“I’ve been thinking about doing this for so long,” he admits before licking up your cunt with a flattened tongue, sending one of your hands down to get knotted into his hair and the other gripping onto the bedsheets for dear life. 
He continues to lick his tongue through your folds, and you begin to writhe underneath his touch, “Fuck, Josh, it…it feels really good.” 
He groans against you, the vibration sending another wave of pleasure through your body. Your hips kick up against your will, but Josh pushes your pelvis back down into the mattress, palm firmly placed on your lower stomach, fingers spread. 
“Can’t have you wiggling around, now can we?” he says before diving into your pussy one more. He bathes your clit with attention, holding your hips down and keeping you still every time a flick of his tongue is too powerful for you to handle. 
Your fingers dig deep into Josh’s hair, pulling it gently, which he seems to enjoy with the way he groans into you. His hips buck a little into the mattress whenever you pull tighter, so desperate to get off to you.
He watches you as he pleasures you, devouring every little reaction with his dark and hungry green eyes. When you look down, you can see that one of his hands has slipped underneath his jeans, allowing him to palm himself to your delightful reactions. 
He begins to suck on your clit, kissing and taking it into his mouth rhythmically in a way that might just drive you out of your right mind. His mouth is warm and wet against you and each shockwave of pleasure it gifts breaks you down into smaller and smaller pieces. 
Honestly, it’s frightening how the bliss consumes you in totality: thoughts, body, everything. It’s better than any smutty fantasy you scribbled down in your journal. Your imagination could have never conjured up what it feels like to have Josh go down on you.
“You’re s’hot,” he says in between licks, “And taste so good, fuck.” 
You moan, and he becomes sloppier with his movements, too overcome by desire to think straight. You buck your hips against him and he lets you, allowing his hand to just sit on your pelvis instead of push it down.
Tingles of electricity shoot up your sides as you ride Josh’s tongue. He accommodates his mouth to every jerky thrust of your hips, fully giving in to your carnal pleasure. He watches you, eyes half-lidded, touching himself, and completely under the spell of your gyrating body. 
“Ah—fuck, Josh I’m so close.”
“Please,” he mumbles, his tongue and mouth inseparable from your wet cunt, “I want you to, I want you to come so bad.”
A strangled moan rips through your throat as an orgasm comes crashing down on you. You throw your head back against the quilt, eyes crinkled shut and mouth agape. The pleasure hits you in unforgiving waves, slamming into your poor body until it's through with you.
Josh strokes your quaking thighs, soothing the intensity of your climax and helping you through it. 
“Fuck—that’s it, there you go” Josh coos.
Your whole body falls limp, and you lie supine on the bed, the aftershocks of your orgasm still buzzing through you. Your canal throbs, squeezing around but the copious amount of slick dripping out of your pussy.
Josh clambers up to your face, kissing your cheek and forehead as you try to slow your panting. 
“Josh,” you slur, still trying to return to Earth. 
“Mmm?” he answers, placing a gentle kiss to your temple. 
“That was really good,” you manage to express. 
He smiles against your skin, lies down next to you, and wraps his arms around your body, holding you to him with a comforting firmness. Your hands rest on the bicep settled over your chest, and you snuggle into Josh’s embrace. He’s so warm, and smells so good. He’s exactly what you need after such a violent orgasm.
Your energy depleted, you slip off, so comfortable and safe in Josh’s arms. 
Josh waits until you're fully asleep before checking his watch. Based on the time, Ashley and Chris should be waking up soon from the sleeping gas he had poisoned them with.
Careful not to wake you, Josh slips out of the bed, dresses himself, and picks up the mask on the dresser.
"Sleep well, honey," he says with a smile before shutting the door behind him.
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doveywovy · 3 months ago
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desk nin sakura au in which, at like 13, she did too poorly on the physical part of the graduating exam and is given the choice to either repeat a year or to become a desk nin instead of a genin. she picks desk nin because at 13 she can imagine no greater embarrassment then being stuck in a class of 12 year olds and ino knowing she flunked an exam- at least this way she can pretend she wanted to be a desk nin. they're important! they do important work!
it actually turns out there aren't a ton of civilian kids in the desk nin business. if they don't make it as field shinobi they usually just drop out entirely, because they've got family businesses they could go back to instead, you know? most desk nin are from clan families whose family business is being a shinobi, but they weren't a big fan of murder at age 10 or are really big fans of making excel ninja spreadsheets. anyways what this means is they find sakura adorable and immediately adopt her. shes adorable! and shes got the filing system really quickly, how clever!
she gets put in charge of assigning the genin teams their low-ranking missions and gives ino-shika-cho the tora mission like 30 times in a row because she's a teensey bit mad with power. She initially gives team seven really nice missions to try and win over sasuke, but then he keeps showing up grumbling complaints because it wasn't a cool mission that would help him get revenge on his brother...eventually she snaps and starts giving them the tora mission instead. Be Humbled, You Brats!
she gets pissed with the hokage when he assigns team 7 the wave mission btw. and shes mad vindicated when they come back and they're like IT WAS A DISASTER. IT WENT TOTALLY ABOVE OUR PAYGRADE. she's like YEAH thats why PROFESSIONALS assign the missions not some old man whos trying to dote on his loser not-grandson!!!!!!
she uses her desk nin resources to find out where sasuke lives (forgive her the sins of being an unhinged 13 year old) and starts going to his house to bring him dinner half the week. shes not a great cook. at a certain point he takes over cooking duties and shes just there to hang out? and it takes him a month to be like. did i get tricked into dating sakura
kakashi talking to sasuke about how you need bonds with other people, with your team, and sasuke's like i HAVE bonds. me and naruto are rivals which is basically like being friends. and im somewhat engaged to sakura maybe
kakashi: who's sakura? is that the girl on our team bc i always forget her name
sasuke: no. she's this insane girl we went to the academy with who keeps giving us shitty missions to paint fences 'n stuff. i think she lives in my house now or something. naruto's in love with her
kakashi: and you're engaged?
sasuke: can we stop talking? if im late getting back she'll try to make dinner herself and i cannot have burnt rice with burnt fish for the third time this week
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writingwithfolklore · 6 months ago
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5 Ways to Set Yourself Up For Success as an Aspiring Author
While these things don’t guarantee your manuscript will be picked up or that you’ll sell more books (and aren’t necessary to achieve that!) here are five things that publishing houses look for in authors to help make the book as successful as it can be, and you can start working on now.
1. Get an agent
I can’t say this is true across every publishing house, but in my small publishing house that accepts submissions from both agented and non-agented writers, we move the agented writers to the top of the manuscript pile. This is because they already have a professional in the industry who has vouched for the work.
However!! Important to note that a bad agent can tank your chances as much as a good one can raise them. I had a coworker say about a particular agent, “if I was on the fence about a manuscript and saw (the agent) was representing it, I would move it to the pass pile.” The agent was in general difficult to work with and didn’t actually listen to what her writer wanted, demanding for the house to make poor marketing decisions for the book based on her own personal opinion on what looked good. Oh, and she had also worked in publishing for Penguin Random House for over a decade, so what previous experience they have in the publishing world isn’t all you should consider when reaching out to agents. You want people with lots of experience actually—y’know—agenting.
Check out their previous clients and how many they have! Yes, small agents with only a few years of experience can still be amazing—but make sure you do your research no matter how experienced they seem and see if you can’t do a background check. (The agent mentioned above ended up firing her author! I’m sure the author has tales to tell about her).
2. Come up with marketing ideas
Your publicist is going to do so, so much work for you. Seriously, we have some really awesome publicists who are kicking ass submitting to contests and putting on events and sending authors on tour—but they’re also managing several titles at once, so authors who can pull their own weight a bit when it comes to coming up with marketing ideas for their book are highly appreciated.
If you ever have any ideas on how to reach your specific audience, write them down and try to fill them out with as many details as possible (who is involved, where will it happen, how will it happen, how much funding it requires etc.) and share them with your publicist, the marketing team will thank you for it!
3. Form relationships with the industry!
This one is huge! One thing we actually ask of authors right off the bat is if they know any industry contacts such as booksellers, media contacts, or other professionals/authors. If you can, intern/volunteer/or work for a newspaper, magazine, book store, agency, or anything similar. Having a list of people who know and like you to reach out to for writing articles or otherwise supporting your release is going to help a lot with the promotion and selling of the book! People are much more likely to help out or feature the book of someone they know, rather than a stranger, so start collecting your contacts now.
4. Grow some sort of social media following
Definitely not essential, but seen as a boon for sure if writers already have a community that are likely to support their new release. If you can point to a group of people that already like you or are interested in your work, we’re going to see that as an asset! Especially for book launches—there’s no greater publisher’s fear than a tanking book launch, and it’s so much more likely to go well if you have a community of people you know will show up.
5. Trust your publishing house
You’d be surprised how many authors drag their heels and kick and scream when it comes to the marketing decisions our team makes. While yes, a cover you aren’t necessarily thrilled about, or author bio that sounds a little too self-aggrandizing can suck a bit, know that these decisions are coming from people who have decades of experience in the industry and know how to get your book into the hands of readers. If they think a certain cover, title, subtitle, bio, photo, layout, etc. etc. would be best for your book, trust them. They’re the pros.
I’m happy to answer any other questions you have about the publishing world!
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luveline · 1 year ago
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I have a potential request for the eddie zombie!AU! could I request eddie taking shy!reader under his wing as he is traveling? maybe she is injured and is like 100% sure she’s going to die but then eddie comes along like a knight and helps her to safety, and then they just stick together?
thank you for your request angel! —eddie finds you wounded in the midst of the apocalypse and wants to help, 2.5k, fem!reader. tw for zombie apocalypse typical circumstance, blood and injury
Eddie is absolutely sick of being alone. He imagined the apocalypse cooler than it turned out to be —there aren't that many people around anymore and he's constantly a bit hungry, and having long hair is now the norm. He hasn't seen a real living human being in three weeks and he's starting to wonder (worry) if he's the last man on Earth. 
That is, until he sees blood on the sidewalk outside of a pizza place. He'd been planning on going inside just to smell the floury scent of pizza dough, and maybe pretend to answer the phone (he never worked as a delivery guy, but he thinks it might've been his calling). Blood is everywhere in the apocalypse. Genuinely everywhere, and it smells bad when it's old, vinegary and acrid. There's blood on car doors, bloody handprints on windows, pools of it where people died and then their bodies, reanimated and without control, stood and walked off again. 
So Eddie's gotten good at blood. He knows old blood from new blood when he sees it, dead blood from alive blood, and the blood trail leading behind the smashed glass door of the pizza place is both new and alive. Or, probably alive. Was alive. He nudges it with his shoe, and it's still wet, not even slightly clotted. 
Definitely alive. 
Eddie doesn't really think about how whoever it is that's inside could murder him in cold blood for his gear. Eddie's sort of stacked —he has a bike, a proper one like a professional doing the Tour De French, or whatever, he doesn't remember what it's called, would need. The point is that he has a really sturdy bike and a wagon strapped behind it full of camping shit, and the world is so desolate that nobody's tried to shank him for it yet. He leaves his bike by the door and tries to open the door slowly, not wanting to startle whoever it is that's bleeding that badly into hiding from him and his extensive first aid kit. 
Eddie pulls it to his chest and steps carefully over a path of broken glass. 
"Hey," he calls out. He clears his throat. "Is someone here? I– listen, I'm not here to hurt you, I saw the blood, and I have bandages and antiseptic and everything you need. Maybe. Unless you got shot, I can't do stitches for shit, trust me." Trust the weird huge scar on his ankle. 
"Listen," he continues, approaching the counter, peering behind it at a skyscraper of pizza boxes and a dust covered floor, "I know you have no reason to trust me, so I'm gonna go sit outside, and if you want to come out where I can't corner you, I'll help. I swear." 
He follows the trail of blood to the cabinet under the ingredients counter. The door moves near imperceptibly.
He gives it a second, and then Eddie turns to leave.
"Wait," says a girl's voice, muffled and weak, "wait, please." 
Eddie waits, spinning on his heel to watch as you push open the cabinet door. 
He's surprised at the cleanliness of your top half until he realises the bottom of you might as well have been dipped in an exploded blood bank. 
"Oh, shit," he says, rushing forward. 
You flinch back and he follows on unperturbed, even when you throw your hands up to cover your face. 
"I'm not gonna do anything," he promises, panicked, "where are you bleeding? You'll have to show me." He makes sure you can see his lack of weapons and his huge green first aid kit. 
"It's my side," you say, and as soon as you speak you start to cry, little shuddering huffs of pain escaping you as Eddie kneels at your side. "I– I– I tried to climb over a fence, and I got caught on the barbed wire, I didn't– I don't–" 
He shushes you with as much gentleness as he possesses and pulls up your shirt. It's your hip, not your side, and the cut is a frankly gruesome laceration into the fat. Eddie's going to have to sew you up after all. 
He knows what he should do even if he's only done it once before, finding your blood covered hand on instinct and squeezing it. "It's okay," he says, not knowing if it will be, "I can fix it. I have everything, okay? Can I fix it?" 
"Please," you whimper. 
He doesn't need any pleading. He clicks open the first aid kit and looks first for gauze, pressing it to your side even as blood pools wet and shiny on the floor beneath you. You're in agony, clearly, twisting away from his touch. 
"Please stay still," he says, firm but kind. "It'll hurt more the more you move. I have painkillers, and I'll give you some right now. Right now, okay? Stay still." 
You shriek as he presses down on your hip but you don't move. He hates having hooked a sound like that from you —Eddie's not a violent person, even if he's rough around the edges— and he rushes to correct it. He swaps the soaked gauze for a second, pressing down hard again, and remembers with a white hot panic that he didn't disinfect his hands. 
It's rough going. He finds the painkillers, you take them dry. He has the urge to touch your cheek because you're in so much pain, and the blood has somehow ended up on your face like a crimson tear. Eddie disinfects his hand and your hip, which still hurts wildly untouched by the painkillers, and opens a sterile packaging of needle and medical thread. His hands shake as he ties the thread with tweezers. It's imperative he doesn't touch the needle, even if he did disinfect his hands, because it will end up deep in your skin. 
By the time he's ready to start the stitches you're crying and not speaking, a hand pressed to your mouth. "I don't know how much the painkillers have worked, and I don't think they'll stop this from hurting, but I think I have to stitch it before you lose too much blood. Is that okay? Can I start?" he asks. 
You nod hurriedly. "Just– Don't– Just ignore me if I ask you to stop," you say weakly. 
Eddie bites the inside of his cheek until he can taste blood as strongly as he smells it. 
He stitches your wound closed. It's a jagged wound shaped like an italicised 'y', and he does it as carefully as he can manage, even if the amount of blood pouring from it scares him. He doesn't want to do it wrong and have the stitches rip, or cause more pain than they need too. 
He never wants to hear someone make the sounds you make ever again. When he tells you it's alright, that you don't have to bite them back, you start to sob with each string he tugs. He can't imagine how fiery the pain is. 
When it's done, he disinfects your hip again generously. He must not do a bad job at stitching you up, because while the wound weeps blood into the disinfectant like dye seeping into fabric, it's ten times slower. You look down at your hip, hiccup, and look away. There's blood everywhere, so Eddie pulls you by the underarms across the floor and sits you up. You're still crying, sobbing, but you don't say anything. Eddie wipes away as much blood as he can. Then he covers your newly stitched wound with a fresh, thick square of gauze and tapes it. Finally, he wraps bandages around your waist to keep everything in place, and to apply pressure to the wound. 
He looks at your clammy face with a mixture of pity and newfound pride. He doesn't know who you are, but you did a damn good job.
"Well done," he says, rubbing the lengths of your arms quickly, like a hug without closing in on you. "You did awesome. I'm gonna run outside to get my stuff, I have a shirt that should fit you, and some pants. Water, food. I have whatever you need." 
"A tranquilliser?" you ask. 
"Maybe not one of those."
Eddie retrieves his bike and his wagon, carting them into the kitchen, through your blood trail, and into the staff room behind you. It's snug but there's a couch, and that's all that matters. He shoves the bike aside and runs back to your side, crouching. You look like you're gonna pass out.
"Hey," he says, "can I lift you up?" 
"It's gonna hurt," you say. 
"Yeah, but there's a couch in there, and a door that locks, I don't want us to get attacked while we can't move." 
"Are you going to attack me?" you ask, looking like you want to curl up in a ball and disappear. 
He shakes his head quickly. "No. I promise." 
A promise from someone you don't know isn't worth much, but you take it, and Eddie helps you up and into the staff room. Your crying wanes. Maybe the painkillers are working, or maybe you've run out of steam. Acclimatised to the pain. 
Eddie stops before he gets to the couch. "No funny business, I'm gonna take off your pants." 
"It's okay, whatever," you gasp out. "Sit me down." 
Eddie unbuttons your jeans and you kick them off the best that you can. Your legs are streaked with blood too, but at least you can sit down without absolutely ruining the couch you'll be sleeping on for the next few days. Eddie locks the door, grabs the clothes shears, and cuts off your top. You really do look at him then, your eyes wide with fear, and he backs away from you with his hands up. 
"Sorry," he says, "I'm sorry, I'm not trying to scare you. You've been holding your elbow, I thought maybe you hurt that too, didn't want you to lift your arm."
Your fear ebbs with his explanation. He grabs clothes from his wagon, ears piqued when you speak up. "I think I've broken it."
"Your arm?" he asks. That's an entirely different problem. It could be painful for the rest of your life.
"My elbow. It's swollen." 
"I'll give you more painkillers," he says assuringly. 
He grabs the shirt that looks like it'll fit you and a pair of pants that will be too big. He doesn't know why he has all this stuff that doesn't fit him, he kinda thought they were cool. And who could abandon a Dio t-shirt when no one will ever make one ever again?
"Do you need help?" he asks. 
You sigh regretfully. "I don't think I really have a choice."
"You do. We could throw a blanket over you? Two blankets, even." 
"Please help me put on the t-shirt," you say. 
He doesn't resent you at all for sounding untrusting, even if he did potentially save your life a few minutes ago. People are cruel and will do the worst thing they can do to another person if they want to. He helps you into the t-shirt. You flinch when you straighten out your arm, but it goes on well. Next he helps you into the cargo pants that are luckily a starchy but flexible cotton. You wince as they reach your hip. He lets them lie low. 
He makes sure there's a pillow behind your head, laying his favourite blanket over you and tucking you in amicably. 
Pulling his hair out of his face, Eddie laments how sweaty he is and eyes the wagon for what best to feed you with. You're probably nauseous from pain, so while he'd love to feed you hearty oxtail soup or a can of meatballs that promise protein, he grabs a box of crackers, a tin of vegetable soup that he knows from experience is watery and sad, and his big flask of water. 
He sits down a half a foot from you on the couch. 
"Here," Eddie says, opening the crackers. "You should eat something, please. And drink some water, too." 
You accept everything silently, though after a few morose chews of saltine you murmur, "Thank you." 
"You're welcome. Really welcome." 
"You didn't have to help me," you say, shivering with pain still but looking less like you’re going to pass out now you’ve stopped bleeding profusely.
He looks down at his hands, blood in the grooves of his palms, and shrugs. "Yeah, I did." 
"Most people wouldn't, though." 
"I don't think there's a precedent for what people do anymore. You're the first person I've seen in weeks."
"You're lucky." 
"Yeah?" He tucks his hair behind his shoulder. "I guess I am." 
You eat another cracker, and then you stick out your hand very tentatively. "I'm Y/N. Thank you for saving me." 
He shakes your hand with the same tentativeness.
"I'm Eddie," he says with a smile. "You're welcome." 
"I thought I was gonna die in the cabinet," you say, rubbing your eyes, "like a sick dog. I just wanted to be alone while it happened." 
It's a very solemn thing to admit to, and in the quiet of the room, your face and hands dull with blood, it's macabre.
"Sorry I didn't let you die," he says, trying not to laugh in shock. 
You visibly fluster, your embarrassment held tightly in the set of your shoulders and your frenetic hand as you rub your collar. "I didn't want to die. I don't want to." 
"Then you won't," Eddie says, knowing it's not that simple, but needing to persuade the agony from your face. 
You look down at your lap. Eddie searches for something to offer, something he can give now that you're lucid enough to know you were in the shit. It's terrifying business, knowing you could've died. 
"I have a bottle of Black Coconut rum if you're interested. I thought it might come in handy lighting fires, but I think you could use it," Eddie offers. 
"Yes," you say, your voice small. "I think so too." 
"If we had some pineapple juice, I would love to make you a Piña Colada. Now that would cheer you up." 
"Rum is fine, please." 
Eddie doesn't let you suffer. He gets up to grab the rum and passes it to you. You drink it in surprisingly eager glugs, rum running down your neck in shiny rivulets like shooting stars plummeting through a vermillion sky. He needs to help you clean the blood from your throat and face before it dries. 
You shudder and pass the rum bottle back to him, looking sicker than sick. "That wasn't bad," you say, eyes squeezed closed. You sound like you've been punched. 
Eddie hoots a laugh. He really missed having good company. 
thank you for reading! reblogs are appreciated, and if you have a request for this au let me know, I’d love to write more of their story!! <3
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cfsharma · 5 months ago
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closed starter for @anthony-in-action
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It was the day of the competition. Kate had woken at 4am to get Storm ready and board him in the van that she would pull with her black Range Rover. She would have a few hours of drive and preparation before the competition started officially. The press conference was at noon, it was allowing her enough time to get the last few things ready before focusing on the jumping competition. She would jump 1m90, some obstacles would have double fences, others simple, some would come in a series of three.
As she drove on the highway, Kate thought about her encounter with Anthony. As much as she tried to fight the need to see him, her heart was stating otherwise: she couldn't erase the imagine of his charming smile, his dark eyes and his elegant posture on his horse. He may not be a professional like her but he does know how to ride properly. A part of her wished that he was here to see her jump, to support her.
"Miss Sharma?" A journalist asked her, making her thoughts vanish as she was now at the press conference. "How are you feeling about this competition? If you win, you become officially our UK Champion and are eligible to the World Championship. How are you feeling today? And do you have anyone accompanying today to support you?"
Kate looked at the journalist and shook her head. "No, I am all by myself. I do want to say I am confident but I do not wish to bring myself back luck." A smile came across her face. As the conference soon ended, Kate walked in the stables to get ready, her thoughts still wandering back on her riding session with Anthony. "Damn it..." She muttered, feeling that she couldn't fight what her heart was trying to tell her.
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suraemoon · 8 months ago
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MOTA: Post-war
~ Easter Sunday Headcanons ~
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🐣: Easter Sunday lends itself so easily to daydreaming about post-war suburban life. Here are some ideas I thought up yesterday of how some of the boys and their families celebrate Easter. I hope you like some fluff. (Bunnies, eggs, and happiness galore)
💛: @precious-little-scoundrel gave me the idea to post these after I was yelling them to her yesterday. I hope you all aren’t Eastered out just yet.
Being some of the earliest birds to the nationwide baby boom due to a four-week New York getaway, the Crosby’s quickly become professionals at the Easter Sunday routine
After an hour of hiding yawns and dozing off while standing in their pews at Easter Sunday Service, all the neighborhood kids show up at the Crosby house for their famous annual Easter Egg Hunt.
As soon as their car rolls into the driveway, Jean and Harry watch in wonder as their crew of excited kiddos doubles, triples, and soon quadruples in a matter of minutes
Hiding spots are determined days in advance and as the years go on, the amount of eggs that Jean has to buy grows exponentially to account for the adopted little bunnies that come strolling by with baskets the size of their whole torsos
Mrs. Jean Crosby puts out chairs and a group of adoring parents get to gradually watch their children grow up before their loving eyes every April
The same toddlers who first waddled around on the newly mowed grass trying to find their footing all those years ago soon become elementary school kids with minds enthralled by the competition
Soon these toothy grinned kids become teenagers who keep the magic alive for the newest toddlers while also taking the time to show the next-gen elementary kids who are the professional easter egg hunters
The Crosby’s haven’t always had the holiday nailed though
One year after much convincing from his wife throughout the whole month of March, Harry agreed to dress up as the easter bunny
When he suddenly stuck his costumed head out from the top of their white picket fence, a church choir of crying and screaming ensued
Instead of being faced with the excited wonder-filled faces that he expected, Harry was met with wide eyes full of terror and dropped jaws full of shock
Children flailed to the protection of their mamas instead of going to hug the famous mascot of the season
He spent an hour going around to every child with his furry head off and shamefully cradled in his hands
apologizing and ensuring that yes, it was just Mr. Crosby, not a giant rabbit who hopped out of nowhere and scared the communion wafers out of them
In his adult life, John Bucky Egan never really cared for Easter festivities up until his eldest daughter was born
When sunny April came around the year that Little Miss Egan turned two, Bucky was excited to take her to the Easter egg hunt ran by the local Church
While the older kids go haywire in their now dirtied church suits and fancy dresses trying to pick up as many eggs as people they counted in church pews just a half hour before, Baby Egan waddles around gently.
Every egg she picks up is taken slowly and carefully from the soft grass beneath her Mary Jane’s, looked at with soft eyes as if being examined and if found fit, is put into her pink basket
Bucky, being impatient and full of excitement for this newly unlocked family activity, sneaks a few extra eggs into her basket to make it look like she has more
His little princess shouldn’t have to hunt for all her own eggs and risk getting her white lace dress dirty anyways
Egan is the only adult collecting eggs with a bunch of random kids. His excuse is that he and his little one share a basket of course. She needs her daddy to teach her how egg hunts are done in order to be better prepped for next year.
The Egan’s aren’t the only ones with a knack for egg hunts.
The Rosenthal children do not celebrate Easter but it does not stop them from showing up to the park’s “Eggstravaganza Hunt” every year
Being the determined little Rosies that they are, they dominate the competition. These kids will have their baskets full to the brim with eggs in a matter of minutes.
You notice a child with a head full of bouncy brown curls, pink cheeks, and grass stained knees run by you? You better hope that your little Bobby can keep up.
Rosie watches on like a focused parent at their child’s soccer game
His children with their chocolate and sugar covered faces furrow their eyebrows and tilt their heads when a random woman with a crying child tells them “Do y’all really need all that candy? Jesus would want you to share, don’t you think?”
The Mini Rosenthals come back home with sugar rushes that can power the whole neighborhood for a week straight
An upside for Rosie and his wife who have to deal with these energized little roadrunners is that the kids crash an hour earlier than usual
leaving room for extra alone time on a cool Sunday night
One easter, Benny Demarco randomly walks through the foyer of his home with a white floppy eared bunny wearing a perfect little bow tie
Is that the one you wore to our date last weekend? His wife can’t help but shake her head at her husband’s audacity as the children gather around their newest sibling with eyes full of happiness
The kids are excited but Mrs. Demarco has to try to put on a smile because “Who the hell is going to take care of that thing?”
Soon enough, a hutch is built in the backyard and more bunnies are added to the family
Mrs. Demarco falls in love and calls them her “bunny babes”
She’s met with a “I knew it was a good idea” from her husband every time she is seen cradling and baby-talking to one of their beloved pets
I mean…they are both major pet lovers. It’s one of the reasons they work so well together. But is one more responsible of the two? Definitely.
The excited squeals of children and adorable nose twitches of cute little bunnies makes it all worth it
The Demarcos aren’t the only 100th household with their own personal Easter Bunny
When John Egan jokingly told his four year old that leaving a baby carrot under her pillow would lead to a special gift from Mr. Easter Bunny himself, he did not expect her to take it seriously.
At midnight, Bucky wakes up with eyes hardly open and gets out of bed with a mission
This annual mission is to tiptoe into his daughter’s bedroom and carefully exchange the aluminum foil wrapped baby carrot tucked carefully under her soft pillow for a few cents from his wallet
As more children are born, the tradition continues
Even future generations of Egans continue to buy bags of baby carrots as Easter Sunday approaches
Not only to snack on them all of Spring Break but also to place one in a sandwich bag or wrap one in saran wrap to hide underneath each child’s pillow
Not necessarily knowing why they’re the only house that participates in this unusual tradition
Not knowing that it started from the unbreaking belief of a wide-eyed four year old and her father who stopped laughing when he realized that he was stuck playing off-brand Tooth Fairy for the rest of his life
Gale Cleven’s household has a more relaxed Easter Sunday compared to the rest
After Church, some Easter themed activities, and a well-needed nap upon arriving home, the Cleven’s go to their garden to plant new flowers
Fresh tulips, chrysanthemums, and pansies are all beautiful, refreshing signs that spring is here
Why do the Cleven’s have such green thumbs you ask? Maybe their blonde hair resembles the comforting sun, the plants can’t help but feel warmth. Maybe their caring blue eyes are as nurturing as water, the plants can’t help but thrive.
They started growing flowers and vegetables in their garden when the first after they bought their house
It was the Clevens’ first step towards making it a home
The flowers represented new beginnings, fresh starts, and growth. Essentials after everything they have been through.
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Hope you enjoyed! Wishing everyone a happy, happy Spring🌸 My first time writing something and posting it in 4 months…ahhhh. There’s more where this came from, my mind just does not stop.
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iheartvmt · 4 months ago
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So this afternoon I was chilling in my Mom's little backyard, the whole family, dogs and all, were there because it was my nephew's 8th birthday party (plus a surprise little belated Happy Birthday party for my stepdad and me, who had birthdays earlier this month), the kids were all playing in the above-ground pool...
And a freaking *hawk* stooped onto their TMNT ball, flopped about a bit, and then flew up to sit on the fence like 5 feet away from the pack of screaming, splashing little boys.
Needless to say, that's not normal hawk behavior.
Then it tried to stoop on the ball again, with similar bad results, and fluttered atop an old canopy thing folded up against the shed. We were all keeping an eye on it because wtf? It was sitting a little hunched so I thought "Maybe it's just overheated and dehydrated," and I set a bowl of water next to it. It ignored both my approach and the water.
Then it started eyeing the dogs, tilting its head this way and that as they ran by playing chase. Most of the family dogs are much too big to be taken out by a little hawk, but my two dogs are on the smaller size. Still too big for a hawk to carry off, but if one were desperate enough it might give it a go and do some damage.
Before we could shoo it away, it stooped on the largest dog, Oreo, a 70 lb pit bull/husky mix! O.O
Fortunately for the bird, Oreo was too startled to do anything but yelp, shake it off her back, and run under the table. (Don't worry, Oreo didn't have any injuries, except maybe to her pride!)
It didn't fly back to a perch this time, just sat on the ground hissing amidst the chaos of dogs and very loud humans.
Rin, my newest dog, is an 11 lb poodle mixed with what I'm now certain is terrier, and she ran straight at it, barking and ready to tear it up, talons be damned, but my stepdad scooped her up before she made contact.
I quickly grabbed my cousin's shirt from a beach chair and caught it up (while the other adults impressed upon the kids that this is something You Do Not Do, Auntie is a Professional). As it hissed and snapped at me, I could see it had some kind of white plaque in its throat, and its mucous membranes were bright red, either from stress or possibly stomatitis :(
Then Mom -- well used to animal shenanigans by now, bless her -- appeared with the cat carrier and held it for me so I could get the hawk inside and carefully free the shirt from its talons.
After setting the carrier in a quiet, shaded spot away from the party, I called the local rehabbers on the game department website who are listed as licensed to care for raptors, all of which were currently full. Well, crap. So then I called the Wildlife Center of VA, but it was already after-hours, and I had to leave a message in their non-emergency box (I tried the emergency line first, but the voicemail message has a very clear set of what qualifies as a true emergency, and this wasn't it so I didn't bother the poor vet intern on call). They'll call back during their regular hours tomorrow, and I'll drive it wherever they tell me to take it.
In the meantime, I have a very unhappy hawk in a cat carrier in my bathroom 😬
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