#anyway i love these two sisters... i just hope charlotte is doing okay in old age😭

[mako-neexu]

if i dont get "Place Hope" in game i will eat my phone without swallowing

[alphabetremix]

My Generation Six Heir, Adeline Olvera, continued

also turned into a reflection...

Adeline and Rin's second child Charlotte was born while August was an infant! I consider this to be The Sim's equivalent of two under two. Also the Relationship and Pregnancy Overhaul mod by lumpinou (🐐 status wow!) makes this quite realistic. Basically Rin now can not stand being pregnant and is just not okay with it. Was it too many pregnancies too soon? She'd also love to have another child. But that's life, even in The Sims now!

Adeline has always loved family. She loves her parents, siblings, cousins, and has been around lots of kids. Parenting came naturally and she was as doting and supportive as her parents were with her. She was also stricter. Funny as when she was a toddler, she was so difficult and later in youth, her parents let her do what she wanted.

Based on my screenshots, I think she spent more time with Charlotte when she was an infant and toddler than August. Maybe it was because of her work.

At this point I see she is in the Adult lifestage. I think she'd also progressed far enough in her career that she had more free time (only in The Sims lol. Well, it depends)

Rin was the stay at home mom. Also, grandma Elizabeth helped a ton.

So Adeline's an accomplished Sim and her life is going great. Thriving career plus a lovely family. Just goals! I have to admit, she's also had a nice life

But she has had struggles. This period of her life was dominated by grief. I talked about sad periods when many Sims are dying. This is it. It started when she lost her father. With family support and mourning however, she was able to move on.

Pushing through along with those happy moments, like August's birthday

Family reunions (this one doubled as Charlotte's birthday)

And love. I can't overstate just how supportive Rin was. And all her relatives. This huge family and support system. It made losing them even more painful. I looked at her life statistics and sadness has been one of her most common emotions. I'm glad she likely won't outlive Rin. It sucks to make Rin the widow instead, but after what Adeline's been through, I hope it's done

Then she lost her mother. I loved Elizabeth too. Just heartbreaking. She was such a beacon of warmth and good and is missed dearly. This was painful.

Shockingly her uncle Connor and his wife would both have their lives cut short in accidents around this time. Her beloved uncle Jason passed away due to old age. Since toddlerhood, they had the sweetest relationship. He was a great guy.

It was a winter made even more cruel.

Sims can water plants with tears.

I'm just thinking of all these Sims, over generations, and the role this garden has played in the family. A critical source of income, delicious produce, sanctity, a loved hobby, and I suppose now a place to grieve. I call it Rebecca's garden.

Rebecca Olvera was a spare way back in generation two and Valentina's sister. She was I think the Sims equivalent of a horticulturist, of course loved gardening, and was also a talented pianist. Unfortunately none of her music survived. This garden, now infinitely more valuable does.

I have to say this game and the stories told mean so much to so many people.

This got emotional. Now I'll joke about how realistic Sims gardening is. Everything is perennial (except for Cottage Living giant crops. With the way they're planted, it can be like small scale farming), pests are easy to deal with (😭), sunlight doesn't matter etc. Anyways this game is great lol

"Children are life renewing itself..."

Life does that. It's actually the whole point. Through new life. Flowers bloom only to set seeds in fruit or otherwise. Mosquitoes commit to destroying humanity every time they find standing water. People obviously have kids. And Sims do too. Life goes on and my Sims push on for even simple moments like these.

Also Sims has ghosts. In my game they always seem to show up when my Sims are done grieving. It almost makes it sweeter

Adeline's family has changed. It is much smaller. There's been pain and loss affecting everyone, but the most important thing is supporting one-another.

Suffice it to say, generation five is over. Only sims in generation six and onwards are alive right now. It always feels like a new era in time's like this. I feel like generation one and two was a time, generation three, generation four to six (and maybe can be split from Arthur's death), and now here's a new one at generation six and onward.

Okay so these posts are supposed to be about Adeline. It's just that family is a big part of her and everything. The periods of loss were brutal. I just remember everyone being sad all the time. And the children not having as happy as a time as every child deserves. But struggle doesn't have to define us. And life goes on

They all had a good Winterfest. Then New years which is in a previous post.

Now we're at the present

Adeline has recently reached the top of her career, shortly after the charity benefit gala. Her title is Charity Icon. She's also a little famous. She has the refined palate quirk, and the networking perk so far (Adeline is charismatic, has maxed the skill, has loads of friends, the people person lifestyle, and her career. I figured this made sense). I think in late adulthood, she's at the peak of her life. It's great. She's a phenomenal Sim with a great life and part of my legacy family.

Adeline, you're a Sim. You exist behind pixels as a bunch of code and objects. Like all beloved things, most of all, you exist in my heart.

I'm so grateful for this game, amidst all the difficulty of real life.

Honestly while writing this post I was thinking a lot. It almost became like a journal entry or reflection. I was thinking about that period of struggle. And my irl struggles. And the quote I dropped "Children are life renewing itself..."

As this is also a public post, I think I'm not gonna say where I got it from 🙂 It led to me thinking of real life people who inspire me. Two in particular, Sandra Day O'Connor and Hattie McDaniel.

I'm not even twenty yet. Life really is long. I first realized it when I thought of even after grad school (if I go), I will probably still be in my early twenties. Life is a journey. Thing's change. I have and will change. Career's change all the time. And the future is uncertain. I think of what O'Connor and McDaniel achieved despite their struggles. I'm so early in everything. It doesn't define me. So I'll hold on. Even in the darkest times.

2024 has been the worst year of my life. Someone said "Good... that means it'll only get better... if not, congratulations. This has not been the worst year of your life" 💀😂 something along those lines

Happy holidays and Happy New Year. I went from Sims to this. So thank you Maxis (and even EA lol) for this. And of course, The Sims community for all everyone contributes.

[atlafan]

Open Door Policy - One Shot

a/n: so, I love a good professor!harry fic, but I don’t always love when he gets involved with a student, so y/n is his TA. He’s 26, and she’s 23, so not too weird, right? Anyways, this took me a few days to write, and I didn’t mean for it to be this long, but here we are. This is a slow burn fam, like...buckle up. Reblogs are always very kind and helpful! Not proofread. 

Warnings: angst, fluff, and smut! 

Words: 21.5K 

It was Y/N’s second year in grad school. She knew how to handle her workload on top of still making time for fun. She was still able to go out to the bar, and party with her friends. However, she was serious about her research. She had a “big girl” apartment that she shared with two friends, each having their own room. Grad school was expensive, and even though she had a decent job working at the local café, it wasn’t enough to cover her bills. Luckily, she got a grant to be TA this semester, which was perfect because she was interested in teaching at a collegiate level at some point. Her excitement dwindled slightly when she got the email about what professor she’d be paired up with.

“Who is it?” Nessa asks, plopping down on the couch with her.

“Dr. Styles.” Y/N groans.

“Tell me, why is that a problem?” Charlotte asks, coming over with a bowl of popcorn so they could start their movie night. “He’s so fucking hot.”

“Exactly! How am I supposed to concentrate?! I had him my senior year for an elective and it was awful. I was flustered all the time. He’s such a nice guy too, I missed a class where we had a test and he let me make it up, no questions asked.”

“Great, so he’s a good professor to learn from.” Nessa says. “Oh, maybe you’ll get a closer look at some of his tattoos.”

“There’s nothing to be nervous about, Y/N, he’s only a few years older than us, you know?” Charlotte shrugs. “Maybe you’ll fall in love.” She teases her.

“Mhm, yeah, because I’m sure a guy who has his PhD in Computer Science is just dying to go out with a girl who’s only a TA so she can afford her last year of school.”

“What class are you even helping him with? You’re not specializing in CS.” Nessa says.

“Apparently it’s for the section of Web Expressions he teaches, that was the class I took with him. It was really easy, you just learn the basics of HTML and then build your own website.”

“Did you just say that was easy?” Nessa scoffs.

“My older sister ended up helping me a lot because she had a myspace back in the day, I guess you needed HTML for that.” Y/N shrugs. “It’ll be a good experience for me.”

“Okay, but you’re just specializing in Curriculum and Instruction, so-“

“Yeah, that involves Instructional Design, so I know about this stuff. I’m just not looking forward to doing it with him.” She sighs.

“Could be worse.” Charlotte smirks. “You could have gotten with some old fart who would let you flounder.”

“Very true.” She closes her laptop and sets it on the coffee table. “Alright, let’s get this HSM party started.”

//

A week later Y/N received an email from Dr. Styles to meet with her so they could discuss the class and make sure they were on the same page about the syllabus. She was a nervous wreck. Y/N used to avoid his office like the plague, too afraid to be alone with him. It’s not that Dr. Styles was a creep or ever put off any inappropriate vibes, he just had this sort of intimidating stare to him. Even when he’d laugh, seeing him soften was intimidating. The sound of his deep, raspy voice was almost a little too soothing, and she was obsessed with his sense of style. His nails were always painted different colors, and he had the cutest pair of round glasses that would sit on the tip of his nose.

Even though it was August, and still very hot out, Y/N wanted to make a good, professional impression. So, she decides on a pair of white slacks that have a tie in the front, a white tank top tucked in, and a navy blue three-quarter sleeve blazer. It was too humid to leave her hair down, so she puts it up in a cute, messy bun. She puts on a little makeup, grabs her laptop bag, and out the door she goes. She puts her sunglasses on immediately, almost getting blinded by the blazing sun.

She had never been in an academic building at this point in the summer. There were a few faculty puttering around, getting their offices situated for the semester. She smiles at a few of them as she takes her sunglasses off. She heads up to the third story where Dr. Styles’ office was. There was no a/c in this building, but luckily the room they’d be teaching in would have it due to all the computers.

His door was open, and she nearly walked right by him. She back peddles and already feels weak kneed. He had his glasses on, pushed closer to his face than usual, a small fan on his desk blowing the hair that wasn’t in the little sprout on the top of his head back, and he was wearing a white t-shirt.

“Um, Dr. Styles?” She nervously taps on the outside of the doorframe. He looks up from his computer and smiles.

“Miss Y/L/N?”

“Yes.” She smiles back at him.

“Come on in, have a seat.”

It was the accent, that fucking British accent that she remembered was the most distracting part about him. He had this drawl to his voice that was irresistible.

“Do you want me to, um…” She points to the door.

“No, no, too bloody hot to have that thing closed. The little window I get barely opens so I only have this fan to really keep me cool.” He frowns slightly at her appearance. “Why’d you get so dressed up? You must be sweltering.”  

“I’m okay!” She blushes, and takes the seat in front of his desk. “I just…you know, wanted to look nice.” His eyebrows raise slightly. “I mean, like, not nice, but professional.”

“Well, don’t feel like you need to be dressed up like this all the time. I want you to be comfortable. You don’t see me all dressed up.” He smirks.

“You’re a tenure-track faculty, you can do whatever you want.”

“Not true.” He leans forward and rests his chin on his palm. “I can’t call a student an absolute moron when they ask me a stupid question.”

“I thought there were no stupid questions.” She smiles.

“God, there’s tons.” He scoffs and sits up straighter. “But we have to encourage students to speak up when they’re confused, so.” He shrugs. “Anyways, let’s look at the course, yeah?”

“Okay.” She takes her laptop out and sets it on his desk, scooting closer.

“I added you to the moodle page, so you should have full access to everything. You’ll be grading a bit, so I wanted to make sure you knew how to get in there.”

Once Y/N logs in, and clicks into the course, she smirks.

“What?”

“Looks at the exact same.”

“What do you mean?”

“I actually, uh, took this class with you a couple of years ago.” She furrows her brows at the page. “You know, you should really update this, it’s lazy to use the same design year after year.” She sort of says it without thinking and then feels embarrassed when she looks back up to meet his intimidating gaze.

“Interesting, usually I’m good with names…yours doesn’t ring a bell at all.” He looks at his own computer and crosses his arms. “And it’s not that I’m lazy, I don’t have a lot of control over the physical design. The assignments are much different, those I keep fresh.” He turns to look at her again. “I also teach eighteen credits worth of courses, I don’t exactly have time to sit and revamp all of them.”

“Well, maybe I could do that. I’ve taken a lot of Instructional Design courses.” She says brightly. “Studies show that students do better when their course pages are more inviting.”

“Alright, since you’re the expert, I’ll let you take the lead on that. Can we get back to the material itself? I have to make sure you know what you’re doing.” He squints at her. “You really took this class?”

“Yes.”

“And I was your professor?”

“Yes, Dr. Styles.”

He plucks his fingers over his lips.

“I feel bad for not remembering you.”

“It’s okay, I sort of kept to myself. You late me retake a test that I missed once, though.”

“Oh!” He snaps his fingers. “You missed class because you had a bad stomach bug.”

“Yeah.” She blushes.

“Poor thing, those are the worst when you don’t have mum around to help take care of you.”

“It’s alright, I recovered.”

“Clearly.” He smiles.

They spend the next hour or so going over the course and the materials. He tells her what he’ll need from her specifically. He’ll do most of the teaching, and she’ll bebop around helping students with questions. Oh, and grading, she’ll be helping with a lot of grading. He notices her wipe some sweat from her brow, and he frowns.

“Do you want a water? I have some in the fridge.”

“That would be great, thank you.”

He wheels over to his mini fridge and tosses her a water bottle. As she takes a sip, she notices him still looking at her.

“You can take that off, you know?”

“What?”

“Your blazer.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I’m, uh, only wearing a tank top underneath and I wouldn’t feel comfortable being so…exposed.”

“Oh!” He blushes. “I’m sorry, I hope my comment didn’t-“

“It’s fine.”

“I just hope you know I wasn’t trying to-“

“I didn’t.” She clears her throat. “So, I have full reigns to redesign some things?”

“Sure.” He shrugs. “Just as long as I can still navigate it.”

“Isn’t your PhD in Computer Science? You should be fine.” She closes her laptop and sticks it in her bag.

“Right…” He pulls his calendar up on his computer. “What’s your class schedule like?”

“With this one, I only have one other class that’s in person, the rest are online.”

“Perfect, then it should be easy to build in some office hours for you. We’ll have to share mine, I hope that’s alright. Not every TA gets their own office, but there’s plenty of room in here for two. This office actually used to have to people in it, I’m having a small desk brought in for you.”

“Oh, um, thanks. I also work a lot at the café down town, but it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“You work at Bento’s?”

“Yeah.”

“I go there all the time, how have I not seen you?”

“I work in the back as a baker.”

“Oh cool, I actually worked in a bakery when I was younger.”

“I know.” She rolls her eyes. “You used to mention it all the time in class.”

“I did?”

“Yes.” She chuckles. “You made it sound like so much fun it’s actually what made me apply to Bento’s in the first place.”

“Ah, well, glad I could help.”

They decide on the office hours that will work best, and then he dismisses her. Just as she’s about to leave, he says her name.

“Yeah?”

“When it’s just us feel free to call me Harry. You and I don’t need to be so formal, alright?”

“Okay.” She smiles. “See you next week.”

The second she gets outside the building, she rips her blazer off. She gets back to her apartment as quickly as possible, changes into a bathing suit, and gets in the pool outside. Charlotte and Nessa were already out there, sitting on chairs in the shade. Y/N gets out and towels off, sitting down with them.

“Needed to cool off after your time with Dr. Styles, huh?” Charlotte winks at her.

“Shut up.” Y/N nudges her friend. “It was so fucking hot in his office. I know it’ll cool down eventually, and I was also way overdressed. He only had a t-shirt and jeans on.”

“Did he remember you?” Nessa asks.

“Not at first, but of course he remembered the reason I missed class was because I had a stomach bug, how embarrassing.”

“Why is that embarrassing?” Charlotte asks.

“I don’t want him to think about me being all…icky.”

“Do you seriously still have a crush on him?” Nessa asks.

“It’s not a crush, he’s just insanely attractive. He looked so cute being all casual today.” She whines. “It doesn’t matter, he’s twenty-six and probably has a girlfriend or something, how could he not?”

“I don’t know, I wouldn’t wanna date a guy smarter than me. He probably man-splains all the time.” Charlotte says. “I bet he’s good for a quick fuck, and that’s about it.”

“I guess Y/N will find out.” Nessa giggles.

“You two are the worst.” She groans.

//

“Hey, Y/N!”

Y/N was in the back at Bento’s getting some bread proofed and ready for the morning crew. One of her coworkers was calling for her.

“Yeah?”

“There’s some guy out front asking for you?”

“What?” She wipes her hands on her apron and walks out front. She freezes when she sees Harry. She had a hairnet on, her face was laced with sweat, and she smelled like bread, which you would think would smell good, but it doesn’t. It had been a couple of days since their meeting.

“Sorry, had to see it for myself.” He smirks.

“See what, Dr. Styles?” She walks around the counter to speak with him.

“Harry.” He corrects her. “See you in action, of course.” He takes a sip from his drink. “I see you’ve already made some changes to the course.”

“Yeah, uh, it was pretty easy.”

“Well, it looks fantastic. I was going to email you, but I was stopping in here and I thought I’d see if you were working so I could just tell you in person.”

“Oh.” She blushes. “Thank you, that means a lot.”

“Well, I’ll let you get back to it. Don’t wanna get you in trouble.” He waves as he leaves, and she stands there stunned.

“Who the fuck was that?” Her coworker asks.

“Um, I’m his TA this semester. He wanted to tell me I did a good job on something.”

“Oh, shit.”

“What?”

“He’s gonna fuck you.”

“Stop!” She swats her hand at them. “Go take drink orders, I’m going back to the proofer.”

Harry was just being nice, and maybe he was looking for a good laugh. She shakes the thought from her head, he didn’t want to fuck her. He was way more professional than that.

//

On her first day as a TA, she decided on a pair of jean capris, and a light blouse. She left her hair down since it wasn’t humid. She felt more like herself, which was good. She goes to her now shared office with Harry first, just to drop her things off.

“Good morning.” She says shyly as she comes in. The small desk he had brought in for her was there, and there was a small plant waiting for her on it.

“Morning, Y/N, are you excited?”

“More so nervous, but yeah. What’s this?” She points to the plant.

“Got you a little something for your desk. It’s really easy to take care of, should only need water once a week.”

“Oh, thank you.” She tucks some hair behind her ear and sits down.

“Since it’s syllabus week, today will be really easy. We’ll go over a few things and then I’ll probably let them go early.”

“Alright.”

“I’ll give you a couple of minutes to introduce yourself too.”

“Okay.”

“Do you have a water bottle with you or anything?”

“Yeah, right here.” She takes it out of her bag.

“Great, a little trick I learned when I first started teaching is that sometimes you can end up answering a question you ask the students because you’re so nervous when no one answers right away. So, if you take a moment to take a sip of your water it gives them more time to speak up.”

“Thanks, that’s a really good tip.”

“You’ll do great.” He looks down at his watch. “Come on, we should head to the classroom, make sure all the computers are working.”

Y/N nods and follows him out. Her eyes drift down to how his butt looks in his khakis. He had a simple green t-shirt tucked into them. He was effortlessly handsome. The cool of the a/c in the computer lab helps snap her out of ogling. After they check the rows of computers, only one wasn’t working, so Y/N takes a DO NOT USE sign onto it.

“Brilliant.” He says to her.

Students start trickling in, and choosing their seats. The class was mostly boys, and only a couple of girls. Unfortunately, that was typical for courses like this, even if it was just a gen ed that literally anyone could take.

“Morning everyone, I’m Dr. Styles, and I’d prefer you call me that. I worked a long time to be called that, so please don’t call me by my first name. You can call me professor, though, if you feel comfortable.” He smiles at the class. “We’re very lucky this semester, I have a TA that will be able to help you with assignments.” He gestures to Y/N.”

“Hi, yeah, my name’s Y/N, you can feel free to just call me that. Um, I’m in my second year of grad school. I’m studying curriculum and instructional design. I’m excited to be with you all this semester.”

Y/N takes a seat to the side of the room while Harry pulls up the course and the syllabus on the projector.

“Now, who here is a CS major?” Most of the class raises their hand. “Right, try branching out for your gen eds, your eyes will bleed if you don’t.” He jokes. “What about those of you who aren’t CS, just shout it out.”

“Communication.”

“Undecided.”

“IT.”

“Psychology.”

“Wonderful, glad we’ll have a little bit of variety. Y/N redesigned this class, so I’m hoping you’ll appreciate what she’s done to make things easier for you.”

Y/N takes attendance, and then sits back down so Harry can go over the syllabus and explain some of the more intricate assignments. He also explains his door is always open for anyone that needs extra help. He wanted to make a good impression since he knew some of the students would end up in some of his higher level courses.

“Please take some time to go over some of the basic codes and short cuts we’ll be using quite a bit. For our next class we’re going to work on a site together, alright?” There’s a hum of agreement throughout the class. “Great, and just so you know, Y/N will be doing the majority of the grading, so it’s not my good side you’ll want to be on, it’s hers.” He grins. “Alright, you’re all dismissed, enjoy the nice weather.”

Everyone files out, and Y/N takes a deep breath. She walks with Harry down to his office and she plops down in her seat.

“Seems like it’ll be a good group.” He opens one of his drawers. “Here, forgot to give you a key. You can come here whenever you want, feel free to do your homework if there’s nothing to be graded.”

“Thanks.” She takes it from him and puts it on her key ring. “It’ll be nice to have a quiet space, actually. One of my roommates is getting her master’s in theater education, and my other roommate is getting her master’s in music education, so it gets kind loud from time to time.”

“Then definitely come here anytime you like.” He smiles and sits in his chair.

“When does your next class start?”

“I’ve got about an hour or so before I need to go back to the computer lab for my computing fundamentals class. I teach two sections of that back to back. Then that’s it for today.”

“Does it get annoying to teach the same class back to back?”

“Not really.” He shrugs. “I’m used to it by now anyways.”

“Dr. Styles?” A female student taps on the outside of the door. “How was your su…oh, you’re in here with someone.” She frowns.

“I sure am, Melanie.” Harry seems to look a little nervous. “I’ll be rather busy today, but we can catch up soon, alright?”

“Oh, okay.” She glares at Y/N before leaving. Harry sighs heavily once she’s gone.

“That’s one of my frequent flyers.” He rolls his eyes. “Her and a couple other girls try to come by and chat…” He runs a hand through his hair. “I’m actually kind of glad you’ll be around, I’ve seen her fly out of here so fast.”

“Does she…have a crush on you or something?”

“I’m afraid so.” Harry sighs. “It’s partly why I keep my door open when I meet with students. I used to keep it closed to have some privacy, cause sometimes there’s personal things students want to talk about, but she came in last year…I don’t know, I just keep my door open now.”

“That sucks.” She turns to her laptop to start getting some work done. “Such is the life of the hot, young professor, unfortunately.” Once again, Y/N said something without really thinking about it. She really needs to work on a filter. When she turns around to look at him to apologize, he was looking at her, face flushed. “I’m sorry, I just meant-“

“I have some emails to catch up on, so I’m gonna put by earbuds in and just focus on that.”

Y/N nods and turns back to her computer. She sighs heavily. The last thing she wanted to do was make the poor guy feel more tense than he already did. It must be painfully awkward to have students throwing themselves at you all the time, and what’s worse is that he feels so uncomfortable that he feels like he can’t even close his door. Y/N wanted to know what exactly Melanie did. It couldn’t have been so bad because she was still coming by to see him. Maybe Harry just picked up on a vibe, and got ahead of the problem before it got worse.

Forty or so minutes later, Harry tells Y/N he’s off to class, but she can feel free to stay if she wanted. She smiles and continues working on a paper she already had assigned for one of her courses. It was really nice to just have a space to work.

“Dr…oh…is this not Dr. Styles’ office anymore.” The girl standing in the doorway frowns.

“Oh! No, it is. He’s teaching right now. I’m his TA, Y/N, so we’re sharing. Can I help you with anything?”

“No, um, I was just coming to say hi, but I’ll catch him later.”

“What’s your name? I can tell him you stopped by, then he can email you or something.”

“It’s Bridget, and he doesn’t need to email me. I was just coming to say hi and chat about summer.” She sighs. “Sorry to bother you.”

Before Y/N can say it wasn’t a bother, the girl is gone. Harry really seemed to have a fan club so far. Y/N had professors she loved, but it was the first day of classes, she never went around trying to catch up with them. She decides to close the door a bit, maybe if people came by they would just assume he wasn’t there.

Y/N’s eyes start to feel droopy. It hits her that she’s been up since four this morning, having pulled an early shift at Bento’s. She decides to cross her arms on her desk, and rest her head on them. Her music was playing softly in the background, and her eyes eventually flutter closed.

Harry comes back from his second section of Computer Fundamentals and is confused when he sees his door only open a crack. He opens it the rest of the way and stops short when he sees Y/N resting peacefully. He wonders how long she’s been asleep for. He didn’t want her to be too groggy. He also knew some students from his previous classes may stop by for some clarification, so as he much he didn’t want to, he had to wake her up.

“Y/N?” He says softly, tapping her on the shoulder.

“Mm?” She grunts.

“Gotta wake up, love.”

Her eyes snap open. She sits up and watches him as he sits at his desk, pulling some papers out of his bag. She knew it was a pet name often used where he was from, but holy mother of God did it sound good hearing him call her that.

“Sorry, I…oh wow, I slept for way too long.”

“You didn’t seem so tired this morning, are you feeling alright?”

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. I worked an early shift at the bakery this morning, so it must just be catching up with me.” She stretches her arms out. “I think I’m gonna head out now. Oh, some student named Bridget came by earlier, but you were in class.”

“Alright.” He sighs. “Thanks, see you Wednesday.”

“See you Wednesday.” She smiles, gathers her things, and heads out.

//

At the end of the first week of classes, Harry was exhausted. It was always like this by the time that first Friday hit. The faculty meeting was the most draining part of it. He didn’t subject Y/N to it since she wasn’t helping with a major course. He had whined about it in front of her, though, so when he got back to his office he found a cupcake from Bento’s waiting for him.

It took a couple of weeks, but Y/N was able to relax around Harry. He noticed this right away. She was way less nervous, and he felt happy knowing he wasn’t making her feel intimidated. He was also happy for the help. She was able to field a lot of questions for the students, and her grading things was already saving him a ton of time.

The semester was off to a great start. Y/N would often bring Harry extra pastries from Bento’s, and he would praise her for how good they tasted.

“If those whole Instructional Design thing doesn’t work out, you should just open up your own bakery.” Is what he would often say after stuffing his face. It would make her giggle and blush. She enjoyed pleasing him.

They were having a peaceful Tuesday afternoon, holding office hours. Mostly working on their own, but occasionally chatting. Well, it was peaceful, until someone walked through the door.

“Harry.” An angry woman holding a small shih tzu and a large bag says. “I can’t take care of him Max anymore. I’m moving and my new place can’t have pets.”

“Kelly, let’s go out into the hall, yeah?”

She looks over at Y/N, who was stunned. Harry was standing up and walking around his desk to lead the woman out, but she won’t budge.

“Make whoever this is leave, you have an office for a reason.”

“I don’t have an office for personal matters, come on.” He takes the dog, Max, from her and cuddles him to his chest. Harry gets a lick to his chin. “Aw, you miss Daddy, Maxy?”

The woman rolls her eyes, and lets Harry lead her into the hallway. Y/N hears some muffled discussion, the woman raising her voice more than him.

“You could have looked for a place that allowed pets. This is so typical of you. You fought me on keeping him, and the second it got difficult you wanna just dump him with me.”

“I’m never home, Harry! It’s not fair to him.”

“And you think I’m home more?”

“More than me.” She scoffs. “You don’t have a choice, I leave at the end of the week.”

“You don’t even look like you’re going to miss him.”

“I thought I wanted him, but every time I looked at him I just thought of you, and now I can’t stand him. I’m moving to have a fresh start. Whatever happens to him is up to you now.” She drops the large bag full of Max’s things at his feet and walks away.

Harry sighs and kisses the top of Max’s head. He leans down to grab the bag and walks back into his office.

“I’m so sorry you had to see that.”

“It’s okay.” She extends her hands out. “Can I hold him? He’s so cute.” She pouts.

“Um, sure.” Harry hands Max over to Y/N.

“Oh my goodness.” She gets a lick on her cheek. “How old is he?”

“A little over a year.” Harry mumbles as he goes through the bag. “I have no idea how I’m going to make this work. I can’t bring him with me every day, it’s not allowed. Once in a while is fine, but it’s not like he’s a therapy dog.”

“I can help! My apartment is pet friendly for small dogs. I could just meet you here and you can drop him off to me.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that. You have so much going on between this, your own school work, and Bento’s.”

“I really wouldn’t mind, I know you end up staying here late a lot of the time, I could take him for walks and stuff, tire him out so you can just have a snuggle with him when you get home.” She holds him up to her face. Lucky dog, she thinks to herself.

“You’re my TA, Y/N, not my dog sitter.” He sighs. “I’m sure I could find another student that needs some extra cash-“

“Wouldn’t need to pay me.” She smiles. “Please, he’s so cute, I really wanna help. It won’t stress me out, I promise.”

“We’ll see, it would only be on my busy days.” He takes Max back from her, and pulls his dog bed from the bag. “Go on, get comfy.” He sets him down and pats the top of his head. He takes out his water bowl and pours some into it for him.

“Feel free to not answer, but who was she?”

“My ex…” Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He sits down and watches Max lap up at his water bowl. “She insisted on a small dog because they’re easier to take care of.” He rolls his eyes. “But I missed him a lot, so I’m not complaining. We were together a couple of years, lived together for a bit, thought it would be smart to get a dog like a lot of people do when they’re getting more serious. But we started fighting a lot, we both got busier, neither of us wanted to compromise, and so it goes. She took him with her. We both got new places and have barely spoken.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, we weren’t right for each other, and he sort of made us realize that.” Max yips at Harry. “That’s right, buddy.” Harry chuckles. “We called it quits roughly six months ago, it’s all good now. I thought I’d miss her, but I missed him more.”

“I get that, I dated this guy for a bit in undergrad, but I definitely didn’t see it lasting.” She rolls her eyes.

“Guys at that age are really immature, anyways. You’ve got plenty of time to meet someone.” He turns back to his computer and gets back into his emails. He looks over his calendar and groans. “Alright, I’ll definitely need your help with him.” He turns back to her. “I give a lecture on Thursday evenings, so no one would be home with him literally day.”

“No problem at all, I can bring him home with me and I can just drop him off to you.” She smiles. “My roommates love dogs too, they’ll be excited.”

“I’ll need your phone number, just to get updates and stuff, it’ll be easier than email.”

“Sure!” She hands him her phone immediately. “Feels silly to not have exchanged numbers sooner.”

“Was sort of trying to keep a level of professionalism between us, but I suppose you’re gonna be helping me with my pup you’ll be more than just a colleague.” He puts his number in and texts himself. “You’re sure this won’t be too much for you?”

“Not at all.”

“At least let me pay you.”

“No way.”

“Y/N.” He sighs. “I’m gonna pay you, just deal with it, alright?” There was that intimidating side of him again. Y/N just swallows and nods. “Good.”

//

Nessa and Charlotte loved when Y/N would bring Max home with her. They teased her a bit at first because it was like her and Harry now owned this dog together, but she explained she was just helping him out.

“At least now you know for sure he’s single, and that he’s not afraid of commitment.” Nessa winks.

“Oh stop.” Y/N nudges her.

“He has your number now, does he ever text you about anything other than Max?”

“Not really, although he’ll send a funny gif as a response sometimes. He’s got a good sense of humor. You should see him in class.” Y/N’s phone buzzes and sees a text from Harry. “Speak of the Devil.”

Harry: I’m running late tonight, I’m so sorry. Would it be too much to ask to have you just get him settled at my place? There’s a spare key in the plant by the door.

Y/N’s eyes grow wide.

“Oh my god, he wants me to bring Max to his house tonight.”

“It’s happening!” Charlotte squeals. “Have you eaten much pineapple lately?”

“Would you shut up?! He doesn’t want to fuck me. He’s way too professional.”

Y/N: of course!

Harry: you’re a lifesaver. I’ve got some frozen pizza, feel free to make yourself at home until I get in. I won’t have you waiting too long.

“Oh wow, I’m gonna be there until he gets in…” She looks at her friends. “Maybe I’ll go shave my legs, you know, just in case.”

//

Y/N finds the key quickly, and walks into Harry’s home. He didn’t live too far from campus. He had a nice town home. Max scamps inside and immediately goes over to his toys in the living room. Y/N takes her shoes off and leaves them in the mudroom. Harry kept his home clean, and it made Y/N smile. There were some papers on his kitchen table that had grade marks on them. She wondered if he had a home office or not.

She goes into his freezer to find the pizza, and preheats the over. Once the pizza is baking, she plops onto the couch, pulling Max into her lap and turning the TV on. He has Netflix, so she click into that. She pouts when she sees he watches a lot of Rom Coms, it was too cute. She puts on The Office and has a slice of pizza. She didn’t need to work until tomorrow afternoon, so she didn’t mind that it was getting to be a little later on a Thursday, and it wasn’t like she went to raging parties anymore either.

Eventually, she dozed off. She couldn’t help it. Harry had a really comfortable couch, and plush blanket to curl up in, and Max was just as cozy to sleep with. Harry had texted Y/N, but she didn’t answer because she was asleep. The lecture he had ran late, and then he had to meet with some students to help them. Not to mention it was raining heavily, and he needed to drive a little slower than usual. So he didn’t pull into his driveway until 10PM. He sighs, feeling terrible that Y/N was still there.

He quietly enters his home, but it didn’t matter because Max hears him, wakes up, and starts barking. This startles Y/N awake.

“Shh, Max, it’s just Daddy.” He scoops him up and walks into the living room. Y/N was rubbing her eyes, trying to wake up. “I’m so sorry, I-“

“It’s okay.” She yawns. “I wrapped up the pizza and put it in the fridge for you.”

“Oh, um, thank you. Think I’m about to pass out though.”

“Don’t be silly.” She gets up and stretches. “You need to eat something.”

She brushes by him to go into his kitchen and take the pizza out. She puts a paper-towel over it and pops it in the microwave.

“I really am sorry you’re here so late.”

“It’s okay.” She leans against the counter. “What’s the lecture for, anyways?”

“It’s actually a graduate level CS systems course. I couldn’t turn the money down when they offered it to me. I figured since it’s only once a week it would be terrible, and it’s not, it’s just exhausting.”

The microwave beeps, and Y/N take the plate out for him, removing the paper towel.

“See, now it’s not all dried out.” She smiles.

“Neat trick, I’ll have to remember that.” The rain taps violently on the window in the kitchen.

“Yikes, I didn’t even know it was supposed to rain tonight. It wasn’t like this when I drove over.” She bites her bottom lip and looks outside.

Harry finishes his pizza and puts the plate in the sink. He sets Max down and he runs upstairs to his dog bed in Harry’s room.

“Listen, uh, if you want I can set up the pull out for you. Or I could sleep on it and you could take my bed…if you don’t feel safe driving home.”

“Oh, I couldn’t take your bed.” She turns to him. “But I may take your couch. I was sleeping on it fine as is, no need to set it up.”

“Well, let me at least get you a proper pillow and something to change into, yeah?”

“Okay.”

“Right, um, well you know where the bathroom down here is, feel free to use whatever to wash up. I’ll run up to grab what you need, be down in a sec.”

Harry changes into his own pj’s, and finds some spare pants and a t-shirt for Y/N. He’s even able to find a spare toothbrush. He hustles back down and see’s Y/N bending over to charge her phone using the plug behind the tide table next to the couch. Harry clears his throat to get her attention.

“Here, you can wear this, and he’s a toothbrush.”

“Thanks for letting crash here, I get nervous driving at night when it’s like that outside.”

“It’s the least I could do, you gave up your Thursday night to…” He looks at the TV screen and his cheeks grow hot. Y/N looks over at the TV as well and wonders why The Office might embarrass him.

“Is it okay that I used your Netflix?”

“Yeah, I…god, it’s just, you’ve seen what I watch.” He rubs the back of his neck.

“I didn’t snoop or anything, promise.” She smiles and takes the clothes and toothbrush from him.

He opens up the coffee table to take out a pillow and another blanket.

“Well, I’ll be right upstairs if you need anything…um, goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Harry.”

She wanted to ask if he wanted to watch a little TV with her, but he looked so tired. She lays on the couch after getting changed. His bed clothes swam on her, and she loved it. They smelled just like him and it made her smile. She texts in the group chat so the girls know what’s up. They tell her just to go crawl into his bed, and she rolls her eyes. She falls back asleep after another couple of episodes of The Office.

The next morning, her eyes flutter open when the light from the sliding door in the living room hit her. She hears Harry shuffling around upstairs.

“Gotta be quiet, Max. Y/N is sleeping.” She hears him whisper and it makes her smile. She decides to pretend to be asleep as to not rile the dog up.

She hears the door open and close, and that’s when she knows Harry’s gone to take Max for a walk. She gets up and folds the blankets, and puts the pillow on top. She figures he’ll want to wash it. She goes into the bathroom to do her business, but doesn’t change just yet, she didn’t want to leave the comfort of his clothes. She does, however, put her bra on. She didn’t want to bounce around and make him uncomfortable.

Harry comes back in with a beanie on, cover the beautiful curls Y/N adored so much. He was wearing grey joggers, and a black t-shirt. Max runs right over to Y/N.

“Morning.” Harry says.

“Morning.” She pats Max’s head.

“Sleep alright?”

“Mhm, thank you.”

“I’m gonna make some breakfast, you hungry?”

“Sure, I could eat.” She smiles.

He smiles back and opens up the fridge. Y/N grabs the dog food and gets Max’s bowl filled. She sees Harry starting up the coffee pot, and then going back to the fridge for eggs.

“Eggs and toast alright?”

“Sounds great.”

Harry gets a pan heated up and cracks four eggs into it.

“You working at Bento’s today?”

“Yeah, not until this afternoon though, no worries.”

“Oh good, I would have felt bad if I was keeping you.”

“You’re not.” She sits up on the counter and watches him cook the eggs. He moves to the toaster and puts for pieces of bread in. “This is a nice place.”

“Thanks, sort of found it in a scramble, but it gets the job done. Would have liked more than one bedroom, but oh well.” Harry flips all of the eggs over so they’ll be sunny side down. “Want cheese?”

“Yes, please.” She hops off the counter to grab a couple of mugs for the coffee.

“I have to apologize, I don’t have any cream for that.”

“Sugar?”

He slides the sugar bowl down to her and she smiles. Once everything is done they sit down at the kitchen table.

“Mm, this is delicious, thank you.”

“S’just a fried egg.” He chuckles. “But I’m glad you like it.”

“Do you have to go to campus today?”

“Not technically, but I will just to get some work done. I’ll bring Max with me. He likes the little dog bed I’ve put under my desk.”

“He’s really such a love bug. Snuggled with me last night and everything. My roommates love him too.”

“You’ve been such a big help in so many ways. Don’t know what I’ll do without you next semester.”

“I’m applying for more TA positions, maybe they’ll stick me with you again.”

“Wouldn’t you want more experience with a different class?”

“It doesn’t really matter.” She shrugs. “It would be cool to work with you over winter break to redesign your other courses.”

“Man, if I didn’t have to do that myself…hm, maybe I could put a good word in. That is, if you don’t mind being stuck with me again.”

“Stuck with you? Hello, this is going way better than I thought. I was sort of nervous to be your TA at first.”

“You were?” He frowns.

“You’re a little intimidating.”

“I don’t mean to be.”

“I know, it’s just the way you come off sometimes. You’re hilarious when you want to be.”

“Thanks.” He smirks and continues to eat. He looks at her and furrows his brows. “Feel free to keep those.”

“What?”

“The clothes I let you borrow, feel free to just keep ‘em if you want. I don’t much wear those pants anymore, and I have a dozen t-shirts.”

“Oh, um, thank you. Might take you up on that, I’m pretty cozy.”

She helps clean up the dishes and then gathers her things. He walks her out to her car.

“Thanks again for watching him.”

“Of course, I’ll see you Monday morning.”

“See you, have a good weekend, love.”

Her heart skips a beat as he turns and walks back inside. She takes a deep breath as she gets into her car. It was cloudy on the drive home, but at least it wasn’t raining. The second she gets through the door Nessa and Charlotte grill her for details, and they were highly disappointed that the only thing they shared was breakfast.

“It was really domestic, though, it was nice.” Y/N explains. “He was so cute while he made me breakfast. He’s so kind. He even let me keep his clothes, and he wants me to be his TA again next semester. He literally said he wouldn’t know what to do without me.”

“Yeah, because you’ve volunteered to do everything for him except suck his dick.” Charlotte scoffs. “You said he’s been broken up for a little over six months right? Do you think he’s gotten his dick wet since then?”

“Charlotte!” Y/N giggles. “He’s a grown man, he can do what he wants. I bet he has, he easily could have had a rebound, although, he seems really respectful, so who knows if he’s even into hooking up.”

“Right, like when you told us he always keeps his office door open.”

“I feel bad, I’m there when some of those girls come to chat with him, and you can tell they just make him uncomfortable.” She shakes her head. “I think he and I are, like, friends now. I like what we have going, I’m not going to rock the boat. It could really complicate things.”

“So, would you say now that you’ve gotten to know him better your crush is less…apparent?” Nessa asks.

“God no! We mesh really well, we think a lot of the same things are funny…” She wines slightly. “It’s truly unfair.” She sighs. “Right person, wrong time.”

//

It was hard to stay awake during your shift at the bakery, but you made it through. You were thankful you only needed to be there until about dinner time. You had to be back in Saturday morning for open, but that didn’t stop you and your friends from going out to the bar for a couple of drinks.

It gave the three of you time to catch up and complain about coursework. Nessa was directing a production at the university, and she still had students who weren’t off-book, and Charlotte had to deal with pretentious music bros who really liked to man-splain the music industry to her. Y/N felt lucky that the majority of her classes were online.

“Okay, I have to ask, are there any students in class you think have crushes on each other?” Nessa asks her, sipping from her straw.

“Oh, for sure. There are these two boys, they don’t sit next to each other, but you can tell they’re friends. One of them always looks behind to the other so they can make a face. It’s too cute.”

They were at a more adult bar tonight. It’s not that they didn’t like the college bars they were so used to going to, but if they went there then that meant getting shitfaced and staying on the dancefloor until close. It also made things awkward when running into students. So the three of them felt safe here, they could really relax.

“Oh my fucking god.” Charlotte says. “Dr. Styles just walked in, and fuck, he’s here with a couple of really hot guys.”

“What?!” Y/N was buzzed, and she didn’t want Harry to see her like this. She wanted his image of her to remain sweet and professional. She peers over her shoulder to look at him, and her eyes widen.

He wasn’t wearing his glasses, he had a floral patterned shirt on that had the first few buttons undone, and a pair of black jeans to match. They weren’t skinny jeans or anything, but they sure as fuck were working for him. Both of his friends were a little shorter, but both equally as handsome. The three walk right by the bar and grab a booth.

“This is bad.” Y/N groans. “He looks so fucking good.”

“Who knew he was so tatted up?!” Nessa says. “I thought it was just his arms, but did you see his collar bones? We love a man who has going attire.”

The bar was starting to get more crowded, and louder as it got later. Music was blaring from the speakers, but all Y/N could think about was Harry. She wondered if he would venture to her area of the bar to order his drinks. One of his friends went up first, on Nessa’s left.

“Hey, Niall, what can I get for you?” The bartender asks him.

“Bradly, so good to see yeh, I’ll take a pint of Guinness, Lou’s gonna have a pale ale, and Harry’ll have a Corona with lime.”

“You got it.”

Niall drums his fingers on the bar. Nessa was sweating. She had a boyfriend, so she would never do anything, but fuck, that Irish accent tore right through her. Niall looks over at the three girls who had all fallen silent after he approached. He makes eye contact with Y/N, and they share a smile.

“Opening a tab tonight?”

“Yeah, one of those nights for sure. Poor Harry’s had a run in with his ex, basically dropped their dog in his lap and left. It’s been a couple of weeks since it happened, but it’s been eatin’ the lad up.”

Bradly nods and takes Niall’s credit card to keep on the back of the bar. He hands him the three beers, and Niall thanks him. The girls try not to watch as he sits down.

“Holy shit, I thought I was going to crap my pants.” Nessa breathes. “I love Andy, don’t get me wrong, but holy fuck.” She shakes her head. “I may need to have him pick me up from here tonight.” She giggles.

“Now I almost wish there was dancing here. Wouldn’t mind showing that guy how well I can pop my ass.” Charlotte laughs.

“He smiled at me, did you see it? Of course Harry surrounds himself with other beautiful people.” She pouts.

Niall slides Harry and Louis their beers and they all clink their glasses.

“I’m so glad we could all get out to do this. Sorry we didn’t rescue you the second Kelly showed up.” Louis says.

“It’s alright, I appreciate you guys coming tonight.”

“Is Max okay for a bit on his own?” Niall asks.

“Yeah, I put the gates up for him so he can’t mess much up. I wouldn’t have texted my TA to see if she could watch him again, but…”

“But you’ll most likely be fucking someone tonight.” Niall grins. “Surprised you didn’t just fuck her, she stayed at your place and everything.”

“Actually, you asshole,” Harry chuckles and takes a swig of his beer. “I was going to say that I would have felt bad taking up another one of her evenings. I don’t know if I’m in the mood to take anyone home tonight.”

“Too bad, girls love little dogs like Max.” Louis shrugs.

“There’s three really hot girls sitting by the bar.” Niall loves over at the three girls. “One for each of us if we play our cards right.”

Harry’s back was turned away from the bar, so he couldn’t see who Niall was talking about.

“They could be college students.” Louis says.

“Not at this place. The undergrads don’t come here.” Harry says. “Mostly grad students or other faculty that live close by, locals too.”

“We could order their next round of drinks, and then invite them to come sit with us. Booth has plenty of room.” Niall suggest.

Harry and Louis turn around slightly to get a look at the girls Niall was talking about. Harry nearly chokes on his Corona, and turns back around.

“Jesus, are you alright?” Louis asks, patting his back.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. We can’t get those girls drinks.”

“Why not?”

“The one on the right is my TA, Y/N, and her two roommates. I know one of them has a boyfriend…uh…the one on the very left. The middle one is single, but even still, I don’t think that would be a good idea.”

“Mate, you’re TA is that good looking, and you didn’t even try to fuck her when she stayed at your place?” Niall asks.

“No, I didn’t try to fuck her. I’m doing this thing where I don’t fuck people I have a position of power over.” He rolls his eyes. “That’s a no go.”

“But if she wasn’t your TA, and just a regular grad student…?” Louis raises an eyebrow at Harry. He runs a hand through his hair as thinks it over.

“I don’t know, I haven’t really thought about it. I mean, she’s obviously cute, but…I could never do something like that.”

“It’s not like she’s going to be your TA next semester, you could-“ Harry cuts Niall off.

“Actually, she might be. I have a meeting with the curriculum committee to discuss what I’ll need help with for next semester, and we both want to work with each other again. Crossing that line would complicate things, not to mention it’s highly unprofessional.”

“It’s not like she’s a student sitting in one of your classes, then I’d agree with you. You’re colleagues, technically. Nothing in the rule book saying you can’t fuck a colleague.” Niall says.

“He’s got a point, Har.” Louis says.

“Even if I agreed with the both of you, I’d still be taking advantage. I think she has a little crush on me, she’s made a couple flirty comments here and there…”

“Not to mention she jumped at the chance to help watch your dog.” Louis says.

“It’s not happening.”

“Well, you may not want to fuck a pretty girl tonight, but I do, and if the middle one is single, perhaps I’ll still order them all drinks, and just talk with her. Or, if you’re saying Y/N’s a no go for you, maybe I’ll chat her up. We smiled at each other, maybe she thinks I’m cute.” Niall grins.

“Don’t you dare.” He glares at him, finishing his beer. “I don’t care if you talk to, fuck what’s her name…Charlotte! I don’t care if you talk to Charlotte, but don’t try anything with Y/N.” He looks at Louis. “You either.”

“Not that I would, but basically you’re saying if you can’t fuck her no one else can?” Louis asks.

“I just wouldn’t feel comfortable with it.”

“Alright.” Niall shrugs. “We ready for the next round, then?” They both nod at him, and Niall brings the empties up to the bar. The girls fall silent when he approaches again. “Hi there, is there a reason you all keep doing that?”

The girls all turn to look at him. They were sweating.

“Doing what?” Charlotte asks nervously.

“Well, and maybe it’s just a coincidence, but you keep getting quiet when I come over.”

“It’s just…um…” Nessa starts. “You’re here with someone our friend knows.” She points to Y/N. “In a professional setting, and we’re just surprised to see him out, that’s all.”

“Oh, am I? Who is it?”

“Dr. Styles.” Y/N speaks up. Niall smiles as his eyes raise.

“Dr. Styles, how formal.” He looks over at Bradly who gives him the new drinks. “Bradly, do me a favor, put these ladies’ next round on my tab, will you?”

“You don’t have to do that.” Y/N says.

“Whether you know my friend or not, I’d be a real jerk to not buy three beautiful girls a drink, wouldn’t I?” He winks at Charlotte as he walks away with his new drinks.

“He winked at me, oh my god.” She squeals. “Y/N, you wouldn’t care if I tried to fuck one of Harry’s friends, right? It’s been a minute for me.” She pouts.

“No, why would I care?” She laughs. Bradly gives the girls their new drinks. “That was really nice of him.” She twists her straw and looks over at the booth. She can see Niall and the other guy laughing, while Harry just shakes his head.

“What the fuck did you say to them?” Harry asks as he takes a sip of beer.

“Would you relax? They simply mentioned that they knew you, and I bought their next round, that was it.”

“Great, so she knows I’m here.” He groans. “Move.” He says to Louis.

“Why?”

“Because now I have to go talk to her.”

“Oh, you do?” Louis smirks.

“Yes, do you know how fucking rude it would be not even say hello?”

“I don’t see her coming over here.” Niall says.

“She’s obviously nervous!” Harry takes a large gulp of his drink. “Move, Lou.”

Louis gets up so Harry can get out of the booth.

“Oh my god, Y/N, Harry’s coming over here.” Nessa says.

“Shut up,  no he’s not, oh my god, he is, holy shit. I’m…inebriated.”

The girls laugh at her as Harry comes to sit on the open stool next to Y/N. He gets comfortable before he looks at her and smiles. She slowly turns herself to look at him.

“Hi.” He says.

“Hi.”

“Did my friend bother you?”

“Not at all…he was very nice.”

Harry nods and sips from his drink.

“I didn’t know you came here…” He says.

“Could say the same to you.” She looks him up and down. “Barely recognized you when you walked in. That’s a nice shirt.”

“Thanks.” He blushes and wants to kick himself for being so exposed to her.

“You haven’t met my friends yet. Charlotte, Nessa, this is Dr…uh, this is Harry.” The girls both say hello.

“Hi, I’ve heard a lot about you both. You’re Charlotte right?”

“Yeah.”

“My friend thinks you’re cute.” He nods over to Niall. Maybe Harry wouldn’t have been so bold, but he knew they were only a few years apart in age, so it wasn’t totally weird, and he had a couple drinks in him, so there’s that.

“Really?!”

“Mhm.”

“Should I go talk to him?”

“Definitely, I think he’d really like that.”

“Good enough for me.” She hops off the stool. “Ness, come talk to his other friend with me it’s not awkward.”

“Wing-man to the rescue, I’m on it.”

“You guys!” Y/N calls after them, but they’re already sitting down. She looks back at Harry and squints at him.

“What?”

“Did you do that on purpose?”

“Do what?”

“Get them to leave so we could be alone…”

“What?! No!” Harry finishes his drink, and Bradly gets him a new one right away. “Why would I want to be alone with you?” He sees the obvious offense on her face, and shakes his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it that way. We’re alone together all the time, aren’t we? I just meant, in this setting.” He gestures to the bar around him. “I’ve been a bit mopey since Kelly showed up, so my friends just wanted to take me out and show me a good time.” He looks over at Niall who already has his arm around Charlotte. “Although, I think they’re bound to have a better night than me.” He sighs.

“You haven’t let on a mopey exterior, you could have told me.”

“It’s really none of your business how I’m feeling, Y/N.”

“You’re being awfully cold to someone who spent the night at your house just watch your dog.”

“You spent the night because it was raining too heavily.”

“And then you made me breakfast.”

“As an extra thank you.”

“You’re annoying.” She takes a sip of her drink and faces forward. “Now I don’t even have my friends to complain about you because you’ve sent them off to your friends.” She rolls her eyes.

“M’not annoying. I’m a fucking delight, just ask Max.”

“Where is he anyways?”

“Home.” Harry shrugs. “He can last a few hours without me. I almost texted you, but I would have felt bad asking again. I know you worked today, I honestly didn’t expect to see you out.”

“It was a long week for everyone. I’m not staying much longer, I have to be at Bento’s at four in the morning.”

“It’s…” Harry looks down at his watch. “Almost midnight, Cinderella.” He smirks at her and she can’t help but laugh. It was a stupid and cheesy joke, but she liked it. “I didn’t mean to be cold…I just didn’t want you to think I was coming over here to pull a move or something.”

“I’m going to remind you again, you sent my friends away.” She smiles and takes a sip of her drink.

“I did.” He nods. “But I’ll remind you, my friend Niall thinks Charlotte is cute. He thought you were cute too, by the way.”

“He did?!” She looks over at them and then back to Harry. “But you sent her off with him?”

“Yup.” He takes a swig of his beer.

“Why?!”

“Could be a little awkward to have my best friend canoodle with my TA.”

“Right, because it would be so easy to get into my bed.” She scoffs.

“I didn’t say that.”

“You implied it. And I’m not one to kiss and tell, so unless he wanted to dish, you wouldn’t have even heard anything from me about it.”

“Doesn’t matter, I wouldn’t have liked it. I don’t know Charlotte so I don’t really care what they do.”

“You don’t get to decide who I can and can’t sleep with just because you’re too chicken to make a move.” Before he can say anything she’s hopping off her stool and heading out of the bar.

She’s just about to order an uber when he grabs her wrist. It was chilly outside, and she could clearly see both of their breaths.

“What did you just say to me?”

“You heard me.” She yanks her wrist free. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going home to sleep for three hours so I can get up to bake some fucking bread.” She orders her uber, and Nessa comes rushing out.

“Char’s staying inside with, um, Niall? I saw you leave so I thought I’d come…with…you…” She sees Harry who was practically fuming. “Um, I can wait inside, or-“

“It’s fine, the uber will be here in a minute.” She smiles at her friend and then glares at Harry. “At least one of us is going to have a good time tonight.” She seethes.

“I had fun.” Nessa says, and then realizes what Y/N meant. “Oh.”

“Why are you still here? Go inside and find some random to fuck.”

“Don’t talk to me like that, Y/N.”

“Sorry, I’m off the clock. I can speak to you however the fuck I want.” She steps closer to him. “I don’t know where you get off being so sweet and kind one moment, and then turning into a major prick the second you feel threatened, but I don’t need this.”

The uber pulls up, and without another word Y/N and Nessa get inside, leaving Harry outside in the cold.

//

Y/N woke up at 3:30AM and groaned, cursing at herself for going out. She only had to work until 9AM and then should could sleep the day away if she wanted. She was still so mad at Harry she could scream. He hadn’t even tried to text her to apologize.

She sighs and makes her way to the kitchen once she’s dressed. She stops short when she sees a half-naked Niall standing in her kitchen, filling two glasses of water.

“Um…hi.” She says to him as she grabs her daily vitamins out of the cabinet.

“Hey.” He smiles. He looks her up and down. “Are you going to work?”

“I am.” She pops the gummy vitamins into her mouth.

“Could you do me a favor?” He steps a little closer to her. “Take it easy on Harry, alright?” Y/N scoffs at him. “I know, he was an asshole last night, but he just want to do anything that could put his job in danger, that’s all.”

“How would I do that? I’m not his student, I’m his colleague.”

“He just feels weird about it, and he’s still figuring out his feelings. I think he likes you, to be quite honest. You’ve…perked him up, well not tonight, but anytime he mentions you he smiles.”

“He…talks about me?”

“Oh sure, all the time actually.” He takes a sip of water. “I better go bring this to her. Just…consider taking it easy on him, he knows he fucked up.”

Y/N nods as Niall makes his way back to Charlotte’s room. She drags herself out to her car and heads to Bento’s. Once she’s inside, she puts some music on and fires up the ovens. She loved baking, it helped clear her head for a little while. She would prep the bacon, get fresh muffins and cookies going, and she would even make croissants. By the time the rest of the morning crew shows up, she’s just about halfway done with everything. She trays up everything to be rolled out for the people working out front. By the time 9AM rolled around she was exhausted, but had mostly forgotten how aggravated she was. She snags a coffee and a muffin on her way out, and stops short when she sees Harry sitting outside with Max.

“Oh, thank god.” He says, standing up. Max sniffs at her feet and she bends down to pet the top of his head. “They said you got off at nine, I hope it’s not weird that I’m here.”

“How long have you been waiting out here?”

“Well, I came by at 6:30 when they opened, but you were really busy, so I just came back twenty minutes ago. Can we talk?”

“Not right now. I’m covered in flour and sweat, and I’d like to take a shower and then take a nap. I got two hours of sleep last night. It was my own doing, but still.”

“When then?”

“I’ll text you.” She shrugs. “Niall spent the night, I bumped into him this morning. He said you fucked up?”

“I did.” He rubs the back of his neck. “Do what you need to do, and then, uh, come bay later, yeah? We can have a late lunch or something, and I can explain myself. Would you like that?”

“Depends, what’s on the menu?”

“S’cold out, do you like grilled cheese and tomato soup?”

“Love it.” She smiles. “I’ll let you know when I wake up.”

“Alright, thanks.”

Y/N takes a nice long shower when she gets home, her roommates still peacefully sleeping. She wondered if Niall was still there or if he slipped out a couple hours after her. She didn’t care that much, she was too tired to care. Once her hair is dry, she slips a t-shirt on and crawls into bed.

“Y/N! I’ve let you sleep long enough, please wake up!” Charlotte was absolutely giddy, and dying to fill Y/N in. It was around 2PM, she definitely caught up on sleep.

“Gimme five minutes!” Y/N yells back. She was groggy and didn’t want to be cranky.

Y/N comes out to the couch and lays down. Nessa was out with Andy, but she had heard about everything earlier. Charlotte brings Y/N a cup of tea and smiles at her.

“Thank you.” She takes a careful sip. “Alright, go ahead.”

“Best sex I’ve ever fucking had!” She squeals. “He had me all over the bed, it was wild. I’m surprised we didn’t wake you.”

“I passed out the second I got home.” She chuckles. “Best you ever had, huh? What exactly did he do?”

“What didn’t he do?! Fingers, tongue, and dick, it was incredible. I rode him, then he got on top, and then he did me from behind, bent me over the bed, I got on top again. His stamina was incredible. I made him some breakfast this morning and then he left.”

“Did he give you his number?”

“He did.” She beams. “He said he wasn’t looking for anything serious at the moment, but I was free to text him anytime I wanted him like that again.” She bites her bottom lip and sinks further into the couch. “I totally don’t mind at all. It would be nice to start up a new little fling. It won’t be weird for you, will it?”

“Not at all, it’s not like you’re…oh my god.” She pinches the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger.

“What?”

“I totally get where he was coming from now.” She groans.

“What do you mean?”

“He said he told me that, uh, his other friend thought I was cute, and I told him I was mad because he sent the two of you away, and that he couldn’t tell me who I could and couldn’t fuck, but I would have been so mad if you slept with Harry.”

“I wouldn’t have, though. I know how much you like…” She gasps. “Do you think he likes you too?!”

“I don’t know, maybe!” Y/N takes her phone out to text Harry that she’s up and that she’ll be over within the hour. “I’m going to his place for a late lunch, he wants to apologize, but I owe him one just the same. I flipped out for no reason.”

“Well, at least you’re realizing it. Very adult of you.”

“Oh, shut up.” She nudges her and gets up to change.

//

Y/N gets to Harry’s around 3PM. She paired a green cardigan and a black tank top with a pair of jeans. She gets out of the car and rings his bell. She giggles when she hears Max barking from behind the door.

“Shh, it’s just Y/N.” Harry coos to Max as he opens his door. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

“Um, come in.” He moves aside and lets her in. “Here, think he misses you.” Y/N takes Max from Harry and snuggles him close.

“It’s only been a couple days.” She pouts at the dog.

“Come, sit, the food’s ready.”

Y/N sets Max down and sits down at the table. Harry already had the grilled cheese and soup out on the table.

“This looks good, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Harry…I know you wanted to apologize, but I realized today that you weren’t totally in the wrong.”

“Yes I was.” He sighs and blows on his soup before slurping some from his spoon. “Maybe it wasn’t what I said, but it was how I said it. I overstepped. You’re a grown woman, I had no right to tell my friend he couldn’t hit it on you.”

“Well, it all worked out because Charlotte seems to have a new fuck buddy on her hands.” She chuckles and takes a bite of her sandwich. “Look, I appreciate you saying all that, but when I was talking to her earlier, I realized I would have done the same thing. I would have told my friends not to flirt with you or try to pick you up, and I would have been pissed if one of them slept with you.”

“You would have?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“You know why.” She grumbles. “I…I mean…”

“We’re stuck between a rock and a hard place here, Y/N.” He sighs and sits back in his chair.

“We are?”

“Yes. I did a lot of thinking last night, did some talking with my friends. I had to really think about why I got so upset. The thing is, you’re my TA, and you’re going to be my TA next semester as well, most likely. I have a meeting about it Monday. Selfishly, I don’t want anyone else to have you.”

“In more ways than one, obviously.” She smirks.

“Don’t be cute.” He gives her a playful smile. “I think I’d miss you too much, to be honest. I like sharing my office with you. Your help with Max has been great, you’re, like, part of my life now.”

“Is there some rule that says that we can’t…like…go out?”

“I don’t know…I think it would look unprofessional on my part. I know you’re not one of my students, so it’s not as bad as that, but I still have a position of power over you, and if someone found out something was going, it could look really bad. I wouldn’t want something to taint your reputation either.”

“Well, I’ve been over here twice now, and no one’s said a thing.”

“You haven’t been on campus since Thursday. Someone could easily say something to us Monday.”

“A lot of people know I help with Max.”

“Some people may know you used to be a student of mine as well. They could assume something’s been going on for years.”

“Not true, wouldn’t people know about Kelly?” Harry grimaces at the name. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright.”

“So…I feel like we’re just going around in circles here, Harry. Like, what are we doing?”

“Well, if I vouch for you to be my TA again next semester, would you? The course would be for Creativity and the Visual World, and I think you could really shine there, talk about IDS. Also, I don’t know what your plans are after you graduate, or where you’ll want to go, but I’ve caught wind that one of the instructional designers on campus is going to retire at the end of the school year.”

“Wow, so you’re like really trying to keep me around.” She smirks.

“It’s not like that.” He chuckles. “I just mean, it could be a good first gig for you. You’re very good at all that, thought you might be interested to know there’s going to be an opening. You know the campus well, it would be a smooth transition for you.”

“That would be ideal, I do want to work in higher ed when I’m done.”

“I could help you with your cover letter, I’m really good at writing those. I’ve helped plenty of students.”

“I’ll definitely look into it.” She finishes what she can of the food, and sits back as well.

“I really am sorry about last night, I felt awful.”

“It’s okay, I really get it.” She sighs. “So…I still don’t know what we’re doing. Are we just choosing not to date anyone else and also not each other? Why should I wait until I graduate to be with someone?”

“M’not asking you to do that. I don’t really know what I’m asking you to do. I just don’t want to be a cliché. The young professor getting with someone that works for him. I’m attracted to you, I can admit that, but I don’t want to get fired, nor do I want your name getting dragged through the mud.”

“So, essentially, while I’m your TA we can’t do anything.”

“Correct.”

“And you’d rather suffer and have me be your TA again next semester just to have me around you, even though it would mean we still couldn’t do anything.”

“Yes.”

“Alright, after the holidays I’ll be staying at my apartment for winter break. We pay for a full year, and I like having the time alone. I also still work at Bento’s.” She stands up and puts her things in the sink.

“What are you saying exactly?”

“I’m saying, over winter break we’re in limbo. I won’t be your TA, and I’ll be all alone in my three bedroom apartment. Perhaps there’ll be a night I’m feeling especially lonely and you’ll have the marvelous idea of visiting me with Max, and whatever happens will happen.”

“And then what? Act like it didn’t when the spring semester starts?”

“I guess we’d cross that bridge when we come to it. All I know is that for six weeks, you will in no way have a position of power over me. By the way, I’m twenty-three years old, it’s like you said, I’m a grown woman. You’re not taking advantage of me. I know how it would look to others, so I can respect where you’re coming from. However, I’d like to try things out before I tell someone I’m going to wait for them.”

With that, Y/N gives Max one last squeeze, and out the door she goes. She was proud of herself. Harry liked her, and he wanted to be with her. It was a dream come true. She also didn’t mind sort of waiting for him, it would just make things all the more hot when they’d finally be able to come together.

//

The rest of the semester went by…okay. There was a lot of tension, a lot of it. Harry was just thankful it was getting colder which meant that Y/N was bundling up more. She did, however, look insanely cute in her many layers and scarves. They were busy grading, not having much time for chat chit. She started going over his place more, though. They would have little grading parties where they could just spread out and get things done. His place was also another quiet haven for her to escape to.

Charlotte hooked with Niall almost every weekend, it was pretty cute. They were having fun, and Y/N was happy for her friend. Even though sometimes Y/N wished Harry would just fuck her on his kitchen table on top of all the graded papers and tests, and maybe sometimes he fantasized about the same thing, but it had to stay professional. She didn’t want him regretting anything. Sometimes he would come into Bento’s when she was working, she even snuck him in early one morning to show him how she made the croissants he liked so much. They were essentially dating, but without all the physical stuff.

At least Y/N could catch some relief later at night in her bed. She didn’t think of Harry at first. Her routine mostly consisted of headphones, pornhub, and a few orgasms. But there was one particular night her and Harry were sitting in front of his fireplace, and he just looked so sexy, and she wanted him to take her on his living room floor, she didn’t even care if her tailbone would be bruised the next day. She still hadn’t even seen his fucking bedroom, it was the one part of the house she wasn’t allowed in. So she start fantasizing about his bed, and then one thing led to another and she ended up moaning out his name in a shallow breath. It had caught her by surprise, and she was almost embarrassed about it.

Harry would have been lying if he said he wasn’t doing the same thing. It mostly happened early in the morning when he’d take his shower. It just sort of happened. He woke up one morning, rolled over and wished she was there next to him. He had seen her fall asleep so many times, and he thought she was incredibly cute. He liked having Max in the bed, but he wanted Y/N. So when he got into the shower he just couldn’t stop thinking about her. He didn’t feel embarrassed, he didn’t feel guilty, he mostly felt annoyed because he just wanted the real thing.

It was confirmed that Y/N would be his TA again in the spring, and they were both exited. He liked having her in his office, and he thought they worked together really well. It was worth it, it was all going to be worth it.

Harry went home to London for the holidays, and Y/N went home to her parents’ house. It was a tough goodbye. They hugged, and maybe they kissed each other on the cheek, but neither wanted to let go. Y/N loved seeing her family, but ten days was plenty. She liked having her apartment to herself. Nessa and Charlotte wouldn’t be back for a few weeks. That meant Y/N could watch whatever she wanted on TV, she didn’t have to worry about being quiet on the early mornings she had to work, and she could take a long shower.

A big snow storm was coming, which was starting to make Y/N nervous. Stores were closing in preparation, and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to weather it alone.

Y/N: are you back from London? Can’t remember when you said you’d be home…

Harry: hey! I was just going to message you, I got back yesterday, was just sleeping off the jetlag. What’s up?

Y/N: this impending storm is freaking me out…

Harry: do you wanna get snowed in at my place? Just stalked up at the grocery store…

Y/N: are you sure? I don’t wanna be a burden :(

Harry: you wouldn’t be! You know I want to see you, so does Max :)

Y/N: okay! I’ll pack a bag and head over, see you soon!

Harry had been cute while he was away, sending Y/N a few selfies of him and Max. She had been to his house so many times, this wouldn’t be weird at all to spend a couple of snowy days together. She gets all her things packed, and makes her way to Harry’s. It was just starting to flurry when she parked in his driveway. He comes outside to help her with her things.

“And this time, you’ll let me set up the pullout for you. No need to sleep on a couch for two days.”

“Okay.”

She was hoping he’d give in and let her sleep in his bed with him. Actually, she was hoping he’d pick her up, swing her around, and kiss her. He sets her things down and waits for her to take her coat off, then he hugs hers.

“Had a good holiday?” He asks as he lets her go.

“Yeah, it was good. You?”

“It was great, love getting to see my family.” Max comes trotting in and greets Y/N.

“There’s my little man.” She scoops him up and gives him kisses.

“I was just going to make some tea, would you like some?”

“Please.” She plops down with Max on the couch.

“Do you have to work at Bento’s during all this? I can drive you if you want.”

“No, they closed in preparation of the storm.”

“Oh, good!”

Y/N turns the TV on, and scrolls through Netflix for something simple to watch. Harry comes over with two mugs of tea and he sits down next to her.

“Find anything good? Feel like it’s all Christmas movies right now.”

“Nothing yet…” She squints at the TV. “How about…oh! Have you watched Love, Victor yet? It’s been on my list for ages.”

“Is it based off of Love, Simon?”

“Yeah! This kid Victor is new in town, and ends up going to the same school Simon did.”

“Sure, we could watch that.”

“Shit, it’s on Hulu, you have that right?”

“Mhm, gimme the remote, I’ll switch it over.” She hands it to him and sips on her tea while he queues it up.

“Mm, this is tasty, what is it?”

“It’s black tea with honey, love.” He looks at her wants to laugh. “I don’t usually add anything, but I thought you’d like the honey.”

“It’s perfect, thank you.”

The show starts just as the sun was setting outside. Y/N pulls the blanket Harry keeps on the back of the couch over her legs, and Max moves to Harry’s lap.

“Let me know if I’m being a blanket hog.”

“S’alright, he keeps me pretty warm.”

“Don’t be annoying.” She huffs and spreads the blanket out equally over them. “See, nice and cozy.”

“I’m not being annoying, I’m being…respectful.”

“Golly gee, thanks, mister.” She pouts at him and he rolls his eyes.

“Now who’s being annoying?”

A couple of episodes in, and Harry’s stomach starts rumbling.

“Are you hungry? I can pop a pizza in the oven, or make some pasta?”

“Pizza would be perfect, thank you.”

“Pause it, I just need a minute to get it in the oven.”

Y/N nods and scrolls through her phone while she waits for him to come back. This was nice. It was like they were hanging out as friends, which was okay, but she was hoping he’d make a move for fuck’s sake.

“Alright, should be about fifteen minutes.” He smiles and gets back under the blanket. Y/N presses and play and they get back into it.

After the pizza, they nearly almost binge the entire show. Harry was starting to doze off, so they decide to call it a night. He looks outside in the kitchen window.

“I am not looking forward to digging out our cars. Times like this I wish I had a garage.” He sighs.

“You say that like you’ll be doing it alone. I’ve got all my snow gear, I can help.”

“Right, like I’d let you break your back out there.” He scoffs, and puts his hand on her shoulder. “Let me make up the pullout for you.”

Y/N watches as Harry moves the coffee table, and hoists the pullout into place. The sheets were already on it, so he just lays the blankets and pillows out.

“Well, I’ll be upstairs with Max if you need anything. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, thanks again for letting me stay. I think I would have been scared all alone.”

“No worries, I’m glad you’re here. I, uh, missed you over the holidays.” He clears his throat and heads upstairs.

Y/N does her nightly routine and puts on a tank top and pajama pants for bed. She gets onto the pullout and tries to listen to some music to fall asleep, but the wind was whipping so harshly outside, it was making her uneasy. She hated storms more than anything. Would Harry mind if she crawled into bed with him? She could even sleep on the floor. She just didn’t want to be down here alone. She sighs and slowly gets out of the bed. She makes her way upstairs.

Harry’s bedroom was the entire upstairs, it was sort of like a loft. He had a king sized bed, a decent looking bedroom set, and an en suite. Y/N thought it was really nice, well, what she could make out of it since it was so dark.

“Harry?” She whispers. His head was in his pillow, sleeping on his tummy.

“Mm?” He grunts, clearly out of it.

“I’m a little scared downstairs, would it be alright if I slept on the floor up here?”

“Get in.” He mumbles.

“Really, are you sure? Because I-“

He flips some of the covers back, eyes still closed. Y/N takes a deep breath and gets into the bed. Max was half asleep, but he moves away from Harry to make room for her, plopping down near his feet. Y/N climbs in and faces away from him. This was such a large bed for one guy, and it made her wonder who was the last person to share it with him. She wanted to keep a respectful distance from him, but before she could start counting sheep, his arm was wrapped around her waist, pulling her close to him. Her breath hitched, but she could hear his steady breathing, he was definitely asleep. He must just sleep better when he’s holding onto something, she thinks.

//

Harry’s eyes flutter open around 5AM. He was used to getting up that early to take Max out, but for some reason he felt like he got some of the most restful sleep he’s gotten in a long time. He feels warm and cozy, and even though he knows he needs to get up and brave the cold so his dog could relieve himself, he found himself nuzzling in to whatever he was holding onto.

That’s when it hits him that he wasn’t dreaming last night, and Y/N genuinely came up into his room because she was feeling uneasy being all alone downstairs. She was still fully clothed, but he wasn’t he was only in his boxers. His leg was between hers, and she was pressed up against him. He wondered if she slept well like this. Just because he slept better holding onto something didn’t mean that she would.

He makes subtle movements, not wanting to wake her. He nearly winced leaving the warmth of the bed, but he got through it. Max pops his head up and Harry puts his finger up to his lips to signal that he needed to be quiet. Harry snatches his sweatpants and a pair of socks, and grabs Max to take him downstairs. He throws his coat and boots on, gets the leash on Max, and out the door he goes. He shoves his beanie down over his ears as he feels the wind whip around. There were snow drifts everywhere and it was still coming down. He uses the flashlight on his phone so Max could see what he was doing.

“Come on, buddy, I know it’s cold, but Daddy doesn’t wanna be out here long.” He wanted to get back to Y/N.

Once Max does his business, Harry gets him so food and fresh water. He strips himself of his jacket and socks, but leaves his sweatpants on. He was shirtless, but he was too groggy from the morning to care. Once Max is all set, Harry carries him upstairs so his collar doesn’t jingle around. He plops him on the bed, and he goes right over to Y/N to curl up with her. Harry uses the bathroom quick, brushing his teeth and all that, and then slowly slides back into bed. Y/N hadn’t moved, still laying on her side facing away from him, so he just wraps himself back around her. Well, he thought she hadn’t moved. The second she heard the door close downstairs, she sprinted down to “her” bathroom to wash up and brush her own teeth. She wasn’t sure if morning snuggles would ensue, but she wanted to be fresh if they did.

A sigh leaves Harry’s lips as he settles back in, pressing nice and close to her and keeping his arm around her waist. She gives it a few minutes, and then she adjust against him. She could tell he was wearing sweatpants now, and not just his boxers. She was subtle about it, not fully pressing her ass against him, just a simple adjustment, so he didn’t think anything of it. After another couple of moments, she presses back into him, and he involuntarily presses forward towards her. He was definitely starting to get hard. He grips her waist a little tighter as he continues to press into her.

“Mm, Harry?” She rolls onto her back to look up at him.

“Hi.” He moves his hand away from her lower stomach to move some hair away from her face. “How’d you end up here, hm?” He asks softly.

“Storms really scare me, and the wind was loud.” She starts smiling. “Feel much better now.” His hand slides down to cup her jaw. “I asked first and you told me to get in.”

“I did, didn’t I…”

“Pulled me right up close to you, it was nice.” She sighs.

“Can’t remember the last time I slept so well, to be honest.”

He lets go of her and flops onto his back, groaning. She rolls onto her side and props herself up with her elbow, resting her cheek on her palm.

“You make things so difficult for yourself. I’m not your TA right now.”

“But you will be again.”

“Because you wanted me to be.”

He looks at her and pouts.

“We’ll see each other more this way.”

“But…wouldn’t it be nice to go out on dates and touch and-“

“You’ve seen how busy I am, I rarely have time to see my friends as it is. I’d feel guilty for not being able to do those things with you.”

“You have me to yourself for the next four weeks, Harry, and the girls won’t be back until a week before school starts.”

“We’d have to stop when the semester starts back up, and wait again. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do that.”

“We could be discrete.”

“I’d have to be a little cold towards you.”

“You’re no stranger to that.” She scoffs.

“Y/N.” Harry’s hand finds her hip. “This is serious.”

“I’m about to graduate, from grad school, Harry. It’s not like I’m some eighteen year old girl sitting in one of your classes. I’m twenty-three, and you’re twenty-six, it’s really not that weird.”

“I’ll be twenty-seven next month.” He mutters.

“Great, then we can go out and celebrate when the time comes. Is there something in a handbook saying we can’t…do this?”

“It’s extremely frowned upon, I can assure you.” He groans again before speaking. “This is so frustrating, it’s not like you’re my first TA either, fuck, even I was a TA. Shit like this never happened. I’ve never been…attracted to someone I’ve worked with before.”

“You’re probably the only professor I’ve been into before.”

“See, right there, you had a thing for me when you were in my class only a couple of years ago, and-“

“And nothing happened then. You barely remembered me when I first came to your office. I was a flustered senior, that was it. Now…well, I know you now. I’m way less nervous around, I feel like I can really talk to you.”

“I feel the same way.” He sighs. “Fucking, Christ.” He yanks her down to her chest, and she yelps. His fingers scratch at her scalp and she nearly whimpers at how nice it feels to lay on his chest, having him play with her hair. “We can lay here a little longer, and then I need to go to move some of the snow.”

“I’m helping.” She puts a leg over his. “And you’re still a little…riled up, don’t you want to-“

“No.”

“But I could-“

“Y/N.” She looks up at him. “Just lay here with me.”

They both doze back off for a bit until Max starts barking. He must need to pee. Harry gets up and tells Y/N she can shower if she wants to.

“I’ll wait, I’ll get sweaty shoveling.”

“It’s my house, you don’t need to help.” He throws on a long sleeve shirt and thick socks. He looks at her crossing her arms over her chest. “Here.” He tosses her one of his sweaters. “Come on, Max.”

They all head downstairs. His sweater smelled just like him. She hoped she could keep this too just like with the pj’s he had given her a couple of months ago. He takes Max out quick, and then sets him back inside so he can get to shoveling. Y/N decides she could make him breakfast since he wouldn’t let her help outside.

She goes through his fridge and cupboards to find some different things. She wanted to make something that would take some time so it would be warm for him when he got inside.

“Muffins!” She says to herself as she rifles through his baking supplies.

She whips up a mixture of blueberry muffins and get them popped in the oven. She has the glorious idea to slice them in half and butt them up on his griddle when they’re done, just to give it a little crunch. Next, she cracks some eggs into the pan, and makes them sunny side down because she remembers him making them that way. She even finds some bacon to throw on the griddle.

When he comes inside, his nostrils are hit with everything she’s made. Everything was on plates on the kitchen table, and she was washing everything in the sink. He strips down to his boxers, having been drenched with sweat after digging out their cars. The snow was still falling, but it was good to get ahead of things before it all froze.

“Harry, I made…” She freezes when she looks at him. Seeing his full body in the light was much different than in the hazy darkness of his bedroom.

“I didn’t know I had blueberry muffins.” He says as he looks down at the plates.

“You, um, you didn’t, I made them.”

“From scratch?”

“Well, yeah.”

He picks up the muffin bottom and takes a bite. His eyes close for a second as he gets a good taste. It was buttery and a bit crisp from being on the griddle. It was perfection. He turns to her after he swallows.

“You’re…a literal angel.” He steps closer to her, and he notices her eyes drift down and back up. “I’ll go put some clothes, and then-“

She puts a hand on his chest. Her eyes plead with his. Just kiss me, she silently says to him.  His hands fly up to her jaw, and he pulls her in, lips crashing together, finally. She melts into him immediately. His tongue slides along her bottom lip, and she opens up for him. She can taste the blueberry muffin on him, and it makes her suck on his tongue. He groans against her, and his hands slide down to her ass to get a good squeeze. She wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him even closer.

“Harry.” She breathes against his lips.

He gets a good grip on her and lifts her up to sit her on the counter. He quickly draws the shades for the window above the sink so anyone out shoveling wouldn’t be able to see anything. He tugs at the sweater of his he was wearing and lifts it off her. Her legs open wide for him to stand between. His lips attach to the crook of her neck, sucking, licking, biting. Her hips buck towards his as she tugs at his hair. One of his hands lifts her shirt slightly, and she thinks he’s going to feel her breasts up, but instead his fingers find the band of her pajama pants. He stops to look at her.

“Can I?”

“Yes.”

His hand dips below, and it’s almost like he’s searching for something else.

“Are you not wearing any knickers?”

“No.” She blinks at him. “I don’t usually wear underwear to bed.”

“Jesus Christ.”

She opens her legs a little wider for him, and he groans when his fingers touch around her folds, and he feels her wetness sticking to him already. His other arm wraps around behind her to hold her close to him. He plays around with her, fingers rubbing all around until his middle finger slides in. She gasps, not having expected so much so soon, but she wasn’t complaining. She clutches at his shoulders when she feels another finger slip inside. He twists them around, just getting a feel for things, and he curls them up, knowing this was what she really wanted.

“Oh! Oh my god.” Her head rolls back. He was make that come here motion right on that sweet spot of her front wall. His lips find her neck again as he continues. His thumb starting to rub on her clit. “Oh fuck, Harry, oh my god.” She didn’t realize how whiney she could sound, but he loved. She was a mess for him.

“Been thinking about this for so long.” He says into her ear.

“Me too.” She was panting now. “It feels so good.”

“Yeah? Like having my fingers buried inside you?”

Her mouth falls open. He was into dirty talk and it made her clench around him.

“Yes, oh my fucking god, yes.” She bites down on his collar bone to try to muffle any louder noises, but he was knuckle deep, fucking her with his fingers, it was no use. “Harry, I’m so close, oh fuck!”

His hand around her waist reaches up to tug at the back of her head. He wanted to watch her go through the motions. He wanted to see just how good he was making her feel. Her eyes rolls into the back of her head as she continues to beck forward. Her release was long, and so very good. She cried out, maybe a little louder than she should have, but he wasn’t telling her to keep it down. Did he want his neighbors to hear? Did he want them to know how good he could fuck someone?

He slows down his motions inside of her, helping her through the aftershocks, and then he slowly retracts his fingers. He sucks them into his mouth and then steps away from her. She was breathless. He kisses her cheeks and then helps her hop down from the counter.

“You made such a nice breakfast, let’s not let it go to waste.”

“Harry…” She watches him sit down.

“What?”

“Don’t you want to-“

“I’m all sweaty, I’d like to take a shower before going further if that’s alright with you.”

“Okay.”

She sits down with him and eats her food that she was now ravenous for.

“You really made this from scratch?”

“Yeah, I’m glad you like it.”

“It’s delicious.”

They finish eating and decide to clean up later. She follows him upstairs to his shower. He helps her out of her clothes and lets her get in first. She throws her hair up into a bun so it doesn’t get soaked. He rids himself of his boxers and gets in behind her. She moves aside so he can wash up. She presses her front to his back, and her hands roam along his long torso.

“You made me feel so good, I think it’s your turn.”

She kisses on his back while she starts to stroke his hardening length. It felt so big in her hand. Harry’s head falls to his chest, and he presses a palm to the tile wall to keep himself grounded. She runs her thumb over his tip and he groans. He grabs her hand and turns around. He backs her up to the opposite wall, cradling the back of her head as he basically slams her against it. His lips are on hers in seconds. Everything felt hot and wet, and just otherworldly. Y/N couldn’t enough. In the back of her head she kept thinking that she couldn’t believe this was happening. It wasn’t often that she got what she wanted.

“Please, fuck me.” She says against his lips.

“I don’t have any condoms.” He kisses down her neck and kneads her breasts.

“I’m on the pill.”

“S’not what I’m worried about.” He pulls his head back to look at her. “Are you clean?”

“I am, actually. I was tested last time I went to the doctor. Are you?”

“I am.” He smiles. “So…you really wanna feel all of me? Just like that?”

“Yes.” She whines. “Please.”

He kisses her and bites on her bottom lip, sucking on it as he pleases. He lifts one of legs up over his hip, and uses his other hand to line himself up. She was still plenty wet, so he’s able to push inside.

“Fuck, Y/N.” He grunts, trying to push further inside her. “So tight.”

“I…Christ, I think you’re just really big.” She gasps once he’s all the way inside.

His head drops to watch himself slowly thrust in and out of her. He bites his bottom lip at the sight. He looks back up at her, watching her features.

“Are you comfortable?”

“Could you maybe just hold my leg up?”

Harry nods and hooks his arm under leg, driving in deeper. Her head rolls back against the tile. Once he knew she was okay, he didn’t let up. He was fucking her hard and fast, only slowing up so he could hear her whimper and beg for more. Her nails were clawing at his back, and it was just egging him on. He uses his other hand to rub at her clit. She was starting to breathe heavier, moan after moan leaving her lips. He could tell she was close.

“Gonna come again for me?”

“Yes, fuck, I’m almost there, Harry!”

He sucks the tender skin of her neck between his teeth, and that’s what pushes her over the edge. Her senses totally overwhelmed. He gasps when he feels how deeply her nails dig into him from going through the motions of her orgasm. He pulls out of her quickly and comes on her stomach. He’s out of breath, pressing kisses to her cheek and neck.

“No going back now.” He says as he caresses her cheek.

“Nope.” She smiles.

He pecks her lips and turns back around to stand in the water again. Her eyes grow wide and he winces once the water cascades over him.

“Harry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize I was hurting you.”

“It didn’t hurt while it was happening, is it bleeding?” He looks over his shoulder trying to see for himself.

“Um…I broke the skin, but it’s not bloody.” She blushes. “Yikes, that’s embarrassing.”

“No it’s not.” He chuckles and moves so she can rinse her stomach off in the water. She turns it off and they both step out to towel off. “I wasn’t hurting you was I?”

“No, oh my god, it felt so good. Feels like I’m still throbbing.”

He wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her close. She rests her hands on his chest.

“Do you like ice skating?”

“What?” She laughs. “Yeah, I love it, why?”

“Because once this storm is over, m’taking you on a proper date.” He kisses her forehead and lets her go. “Would you like that?”

“I’d love it.”

Harry was so peculiar, Y/N thought. One second he’s saying they can’t be together and the next he wants to take her out on a date. What she didn’t know was that he had never felt quite so good while having sex. It wasn’t because she felt incredibly tight around him, it had more to do with the trust and natural connect. He felt happy, a feeling he thought would never return.

//

To Y/N’s surprise, Harry was a really good ice skater. The two of them were like a real couple. He would visit her at work, they’d go out to the bar with his friends, and they’d have sleep overs at each other’s places. He quite liked her apartment. Not to mention, he couldn’t keep his hands off her. If they were going for a brisk walk, his hand was in hers. If they were sitting through a move, his arm was around her shoulders, and of course they were having a lot of sex. Even when she had her period, he fucked her.

“Got my red wings years ago, promise it doesn’t gross me out.” He had told her.

And god, when he ate her out. Sometimes they wouldn’t even have full on sex. Sometimes they’d be on the couch, and he’d ask if she would ride her face, and then they would just sixty-nine. Sometimes she would just blow him because she liked the way his come tasted. Harry drank a fuck ton of pineapple juice, even before they started hooking up, he always had a small can of it in his office. He just liked the taste. They were just intimate in all sorts of ways, totally comfortable.

It was when Nessa and Charlotte returned that Harry’s bubbled had to burst. School would be starting in a week, and he needed to make sure his shit was together. He had been to the office a few times, working to make sure his courses were together. He and Y/N were professional and went over the class she would be the TA for.

“This is gonna have to be what it’s like when school starts again, don’t forget.” He would say. It killed her, but she would never do anything to put his job at risk, even if she didn’t think their situation was all that serious. She had to respect his wishes.

“I’d feel more comfortable if you slept over at my place since their home.”

“Harry, they know what’s been going on…Niall and Charlotte still talk, and they-“

“I don’t care, I’d rather you be here…and only on the weekends.”

“What?”

“Saturday nights can be our night. On the weekends, you’re not my TA.”

“What will I be then?”

“My girl.”

They had put the boyfriend/girlfriend label chat on the back burner, but that was all she needed to hear to know that she was really his, and he certainly didn’t want someone else trying to steal her away. He had gotten her a necklace, it was simple, but very much her style. A way of showing her how much she truly meant to him.

“Anytime during the week you’re feeling like I don’t want you because I can’t show my affection, this will be your reminder of how much I care.”

She thought it was incredibly sweet, and it was nice to have the reassurance. When classes started, it was definitely difficult. The one thing getting her through this first week was his birthday party on Saturday. Just a small thing with friends at the bar, but still. They wouldn’t have to hide there, or so she thought. Some other professors were invited to the party, which meant Harry couldn’t touch Y/N. He frowned immediately. He wasn’t in charge of the guest list. He pulls Y/N to the side before they walk into the main area.

“I’m so sorry, I promise when we get back to my place later I’m gonna love on you all night.”

“Harry, it’s okay. It’s your birthday, I’m the one that’ll be doing the loving. Go on, enjoy.”

He gives her a discrete peck on the cheek, and then walks into the main room to say hello to everyone. Y/N invited Charlotte and Nessa, so she had other people to talk to. Niall’s arm was hooked around Charlotte’s waist the entire night. Y/N and Nessa teased her every chance they got.

“I’ve been told to check in on you. Orders from the birthday boy.” Louis says to Y/N.

“Thanks.” She chuckles. “It’s okay. Next year things will be totally different.”

“Really see things lasting then, don’t you.” It wasn’t a question.

“I think so, yeah. If the person who he said actually retires, I’m hoping to be able to work at the university to start out.”

“That would be great. He raves about you, you know? He’s a simple guy, likes being domestic. I think he said one of his favorite things to do with you is just cook a meal together.”

“Aw, he’s so sweet.” She pouts. “I like doing that too.”

Harry was mingling with everyone that came out for his birthday. Everyone sang to him, a cake was made him too. The second he tasted it he knew Y/N had baked it. He thought at the least they could have their picture taken together, that wouldn’t look weird.

“Harry!” One of the faculty members, Constance, comes over to him, a young woman by her side. “There’s someone I want you to meet, this is my daughter, Angie.”

“Oh! Hi, I’ve heard a lot about you.” He politely shakes her hand.

“It’s nice to meet you too.” She blushes.

“I’ll leave you to it.” Constance winks and walks away.

“I’m so sorry about her. She conned me into coming here, hope I’m not crashing your birthday.”

“You’re not.” He looks back at Y/N and then to Angie. “So, this is a set up then?”

“She seems to think we have a lot in common.”

“And perhaps we might, but…I’m sort of seeing someone. It’s a…long distance thing, so she’s not here tonight, unfortunately.”

“Oh! She could have sworn you were single, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright. I’m sure you’re lovely, I just really like this woman and I don’t want to screw it up.” He smiles and she nods.

Harry finally makes his way over to Y/N and Louis.

“Do me a favor,” He says to Louis, taking out his phone. “Take a picture of us.”

“Are you sure?” Y/N asks.

“Positive.” He smiles and puts an arm around her shoulders. Louis snaps a couple of shots and hands Harry his phone back. “Sorry you won’t be able to post these…”

“Well, I could, my insta is private, but we can talk about it later.”

“Lou, could you drop Y/N off at my place when this is over, we drove together, but I don’t wanna risk anyone seeing us leave in the same car.”

“Course, mate.”

Harry nods and walks away to continue talking to other people.

“He acts like you’re his student. I don’t see anything wrong with you two doing what you’re doing.”

“I don’t either.” She sighs. “But he worked so hard to get where he is, I have to respect doing things his way. It was a long week, but I’m happy to be going back to his place later.”

Y/N’s lips were on Harry’s the second he let her through the door. He made sure to get home before her so they didn’t even leave at the same time. She had him pushed against the wall and his hands were all over her.

“Missed you so fucking much.” He says, walking her back towards the living room. “And I loved the watch you got me, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Wanted to.” She starts unbuttoning his shirt and pushes him down on the couch, straddling him in no time.

“Gonna let me lick it, angel?”

“Is that what you want?”

“You have no idea. You’re as sweet as the cake you made me.”

“How did-“

“Y/N, I know it’s only been a month, but I’d know your baked goods anywhere.” He smirks.

She giggles and stands up to unbutton her jeans. He yanks them down her legs along with her panties and she kicks them to the side. Harry lays down on the couch and Y/N hovers over his face. He liked it better this way. One, he didn’t have to get on his knees and suffer through the pain of being on the hardwood. Two, he liked the way Y/N would just ride his tongue.

Max was upstairs, thanks to the gate. So they didn’t have to worry about him coming down and jumping on them.

“Fuck, Harry.” She moans. “Your tongue feels so good.” She rocks her hips back and forth on him, the stubble from his chin feeling extra delicious. He moans against her, lapping up every drop. “You like that, birthday boy? Like having me on you like this?” She looks down at him and see his eyes rolling into the back of his head. He sucks on her clit harshly, and that pushes her over the edge. “Oh, fuck!”

Once she’s through, she climbs off him. Before she knows it, he’s throwing her over his shoulder to bring her upstairs. He gives her bum a smack and she squeals. Y/N left plenty of scratch marks on Harry that night.

//

Y/N was antsy for every weekend. The weeks dragged on, and the weekends went by in a flash. Then she remembered something wonderful.

“Spring break!” She says, bursting into their shared office.

“What about it?” Harry chuckles.

“Two weeks off without the students!” She leans a little closer to him. “Two weeks of me not being your TA.” She grins and then sits down in her seat.

“We’ll be grading, darling.” He says nonchalantly.

“This is a pet name free zone, remember?”

“Sorry.” He smirks. “Didn’t think ‘darling’ would get your knickers in twist.”

“Fuck off.” She rolls her eyes. “Do we seriously have to grade? Can’t we do fun things? I have time off from school, I don’t wanna do anything.”

“M’surprised you don’t want to go home or go with your friends somewhere.”

“I’ve done the whole go to Florida and get blitzed thing, I’m all set. And I may go home for a couple of days, but I don’t really like being home long. Somehow I get stuck doing chores, and I get aggravated.”

“I’ll tell you what, if we get through enough of the grading, we can do something really fun.”

“Deal.” She smiles.

Sometimes Y/N felt like this was only hard for her, but it killed Harry. He had fantasies of bending Y/N over his desk, or even just kissing her good morning. He even started letting her come over on Friday nights instead of Saturday because he just couldn’t wait any longer. He knew he was being overly careful, but he just couldn’t risk it.

//

Harry stayed true to his word. They got through a lot of the grading so drove them out to the coast for a walk on the pier at a large beach. It was still too chilly for real beach weather, but there were less people around this time of year, and some of the shops were open. Y/N clung to Harry’s arm and they both just enjoyed the fresh air and the scenery. He took her to a nice dinner, and then they walked for a bit to watch the sunset.

“This was the perfect day.” She sighs as they begin their drive back to his place.

“It really was.” His rests his hand on her thigh and gives it a squeeze. “I love you, Y/N.”

She whips her head to look at him. His eyes were focused on the road. Tears start to prick at her eyes. No one ever said that to her before. She had been in relationships, but she never really got to a point for such strong words, and she certainly never felt it back.

“I love you, too.”

“Aw, look at us.” He smiles. “Two people in love.”

“I wasn’t expecting you to say that…” She sniffles.

“Hey, no need to cry, darling.”

“I just…no one’s ever told me they loved me before.”

“What?!” He squeezes her leg tighter. “But there’s so much to love. You’re kind, caring, an incredible baker, witty, funny, brilliant-“

“Harry, please.” She chuckles. “When we get home we’re making love.”

“I’ve made love to you before, just didn’t say anything. Anytime we’re really soft and careful, I’m making love to you.”

“God.” Her face flushes, thinking of the many sensual times he’s touched her. “Well, I can’t wait to do it again.”

//

It was a Tuesday, which meant Y/N wouldn’t be in the office with Harry. She had class and then a shift at Bento’s. He wanted her to be able to nap in between. He saw that the open IDS position had been posted, and he emailed her immediately. He couldn’t wait to work on her resume and cover letter together.

“Harry?” Constance knocks on the outside of his door.

“Hey, Connie! Come on in.” He beams at her. She squints at his collar, seeing just the top of a love bite.

“Did you see that girlfriend of yours this weekend?” She asks, as she sits down.

“Sure did.” He smiles. “I saw her for a while over spring break too, told her I loved her, and she said it back. I’m on cloud nine. M’sorry things didn’t line up with your daughter, she’s a very pretty girl. My friend Lou is single, maybe-“

“Harry, Harry.” She chuckles. “No worries at all, she’s been dating around a bit. I shouldn’t have just assumed you were single, and that’s great that you two are doing so well. I think I thought you weren’t seeing anyone because with your last girlfriend…well…you had pictures of her on your desk, and you gushed about her. We don’t even know this one’s name.”

“You will soon enough.” Harry did have pictures of Y/N, they were just discrete. His lock screen was the picture of them at his birthday, and his wallpaper was just a picture of her. He could look at her whenever he wanted. “She’s, uh, finishing up grad school.”

“Oh, good for her! Anyways, I came here to chat with you about my sabbatical. Obviously it’s turned into a full year instead of just the fall semester. We’re going to have a department meeting, but I wanted to see how you’d feel about stepping in as department chair while I’m gone.”

“Are you serious?!” He perks up.

“Yes.” She chuckles.

“That would be a dream! I have so many ideas, and-“

“It would mean you wouldn’t be able to teach as many classes, and you’ll have more responsibilities over winter and summer break.”

“That’s no problem, honestly. I only go to London for a couple of weeks, I’m usually in the area for summer. I’d love to give it a go. I didn’t think I’d be next in line.”

“It’s coming from my own suggestion. I’ve been doing this a long time, and I think you’d be great at it. It would sort of be a trial, and then when I come back we could reflect on the experience.”

Harry was buzzing, absolutely buzzing. He needed to tell Y/N about his good news, so he hops in his car, and zips over to her apartment. She was vegging out in a t-shirt and panties with Nessa and Charlotte, who were both dressed in the same thing. They hear the bell on their door.

“Who the fuck is that? It’s nearly nine.” Nessa says.

“No idea.” Y/N says, getting up to check it out. She sees Harry through the peephole. Her eyebrows raise, but she opens the door. “Dr. Styles, to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Y/N, I’m sorry for…” He looks her up and down. “This is how you open the door?!”

“I saw it was you.” She shrugs and steps aside to let him in.

“Hi, Harry.” Charlotte and Nessa say at the same time.

“Hi girls.” He smiles and looks at Y/N. “I got great news today and I just had to see you, can we got to your room?”

“Of course.” Once they’re both in there, they sit on her bed. “So what’s up? I got your email about the job, I’m really excited.”

“Good news for both of us today. Connie, my department chair, came by to see me today, and she wants me to be department chair while she’s on sabbatical next year while she’s gone. It would be like a trial run. Me! Department chair! I have so many ideas, this is the opportunity I’ve been hoping for.”

“Oh, Harry.” She throws her arms around him. “That’s incredible, I’m so happy for you.”

“Thanks.” He holds her in his arms for a moment and then lets her go so he can stand up. “Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Harry…” She whines.

“Don’t start, I just wanted to see your face when I told you.”

“You could have FaceTimed me.”

“Oh.” He shakes his head. “It’s been a long day.” He chuckles.

“You can stay.”

“No, I can’t.” He caresses one of her cheeks. “I want to, but I can’t. Soon, babe, so soon.”

“Um…” She stands up and looks down. “If I get this job…I mean…the lease for this place is up June first, and…well…the girls are going to be working in schools, and won’t need to live here anymore, and…I mean, I could find new roommate and sign a new lease...”

“Or, you could come move in with me.” He takes her hands in his and kisses her knuckles.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I want you to. I want you around all the time. Being apart from you during the week really fucks with how clingy I naturally am.” He smirks.

“I like it, though. We spend all weekend in your big, comfy bed.”

“Look forward to it every week.” He sighs happily. “Just gotta get through you walking across that stage, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright.” He kisses her cheek. “I love you, sweet dreams.”

“I love you too.”

//

Harry helped Y/N apply for the job, and after two nerve-wracking rounds of interviews, and two weeks of pure stress that even Harry’s cock couldn’t squash, she got the call that she got the job. Harry took Y/N out to celebrate, they both nearly cried when she got the call. She told her parents and they were ecstatic.

“In a few years, if you feel like it, you could get your PhD for free through the university.” He says to her as they’re laying in bed.

“Hm, three degrees from the same place.” She taps her chin. “Doesn’t seem like a great idea.”

“If you can do it for free, you should. It was the smartest thing I ever did. Well that, and giving into you.”

“Giving into me?!” She laughs. “You make it sound like I seduced you.”

“I fell for you so hard. You’re just so wonderful.” He pouts. “Are your parents excited to meet me in a couple of weeks? I’m excited to meet them.”

“They’re definitely curious to see who the guy I’m going to be moving in with is.”

“Are you going to miss the girls?”

“So much! They’ve been great to live with. Nessa’s moving in with Andy. She found a college in the city he works in to teach at. She’s so good at putting productions together, I’m excited for her. Charlotte may be in the area, though. Something tells me the school she’ll be teaching at is close by to Niall.”

“I’ve never seen him so smitten. He takes the more serious part of a relationship slow, but once he’s in he’s in.” He pulls her closer to him. “Everything’s falling into place. I’ve been working with Connie to get prepared for the fall, and I couldn’t be more excited.”

“I’m really proud of you.”

“I’m proud of you too, babe.”

//

The day they had both been waiting for was finally here. The graduate ceremony was in the evening, separate from the undergraduate ceremony. Y/N wouldn’t be able to see Harry until after the ceremony. She was busy with her parents and younger siblings. Harry may have clapped and cheered extra loud when she walked across the stage. Most people around him thought it was just because she had been his TA for an entire year. Literally no one suspected more was going on between them. After today it wouldn’t matter anyways.

There was a champagne reception after the ceremony. Y/N easily found her family.

“We’re so proud of you honey. Another degree, a new job, and you’re moving in with a guy!” Her mom says.

“I’m still not thrilled about the last part. We don’t even know him.” Her dad says.

“But I do, so it’s a good thing I’m the one living with him, not you.”

Harry makes his way through the crowd over to her and her family. He takes a deep breath, and when she spots him she squeals. She runs over and jumps into his arms. They kiss as he swings her around.

“You did it!”

“I did it!” They both jump up and down for a moment. “Come on.” She holds his hand to bring him over to everyone. “Harry, these are my parents, and my two younger siblings. Ellie is going to be a senior in college this fall, and Ryan is going to be a sophomore. He’s actually transferring here in the fall.”

“That’s great! Hi, it’s so nice to meet all of you.” He shakes everyone’s hands.

“Damn, a PhD.” Ellie whispers to her sister and winks. “Nice job.” The girls giggle together.

They all decide to go out to dinner together to get to know each other better. Harry and Y/N would be meeting up with Charlotte, Nessa, and the others at the bar once dinner was over. Y/N explains how they waited a while to make things official because Harry wanted to make sure things remained professional. Harry easily impressed her parents. He was incredibly smart and knew how to work people over. Even her dad was happy with him.

Y/N got pretty drunk at the bar with her friends, and Harry was able to keep his arms around her all night without a care in the world. When he got her inside his place, he couldn’t stop kissing her and telling her much he loved her over and over. She was excited to start her new job in a couple of weeks, and he was excited she genuinely wanted to stay, and wasn’t just doing this for him. They would spend the time before starting her job to get her all moved in. They even talked about getting a larger place at some point.

“I can’t wait to snuggle with Mac every night.” She giggles as she gets into bed.

“Hey, what about me?” He pouts.

“I guess you’re nice to snuggle with too.” She jokes.

“Mhm.” He kisses on her and hovers over her. “My girl’s got her master’s. You’re so fucking smart, it turns me on.”

“Really?”

“When we did those mock interviews in my office I couldn’t stop thinking about fucking you.”

“Does this mean we can get a little sneaky in your office now?” She raises an eyebrow at him. “Or are you staying firm with your open door policy?”

“Think I may have to reconsider it, but only for you.”

[phantasticworks]

If You Don't Love Me, Pretend - Epilogue

Well. So here we are. it's been a long time (about three years actually) since I started writing this fic and it's grown significantly out of my control since then :') if you've been along since the start, or if you've just found this fic today, thank you for coming along this journey with me. It's been incredible and I'm forever grateful for all the support this fic has gotten <3 thank you so much for reading. keep your eyes peeled for bonus content!

read on ao3

Words: 3.9k

Summary: Three years later

Warnings for this chapter: none

It’s nearly six in the evening and there’s a chiming noise coming from the laptop in the lounge. Dan curses under his breath as he makes his way from the kitchen, hoping and praying the volume isn’t loud enough to wake a certain someone.

He gets there just as the Skype call is about to end, and is quick to press the “accept” button as he scoops the laptop up, retreating back to the kitchen with it. “Hi,” he whispers.

“Hey,” Phil says from the screen, a little smile on his face. “I thought you forgot about me.”

Dan rolls his eyes, setting the laptop on the island countertop and settling on a barstool. “Right. God forbid I’m two seconds late to our Skype call.”

Phil does an adorable pout. “I’ve been gone a week, I miss your face. Is that a crime?”

Dan smirks. “Yep. I’m gonna call the police, have them arrest you on the spot.”

“Hm.” Phil considers it for a moment. “I don’t think I like handcuffs enough for that.” He’s got this smug little look on his face, like he knows a secret.

Annoyingly, Dan blushes at that. “Shut up. You don’t get to flirt when you’re, like, on the other side of the freaking planet.”

Phil gives him an apologetic smile. “Sorry, hon. I’ll be back home in a couple days, though.”

Dan nods, propping an elbow up and resting his chin in his hand. “I know. I just miss you.”

“I miss you too,” Phil replies easily. Dan loves that even now, after all this time, they’re still this disgustingly obsessed with each other.

“How’s work been?” Dan asks, changing the subject before he gets sad. He hates it when he gets sad during their Skype calls, especially when he starts crying.

Phil sighs, shrugging. “It’s been alright. I’m exhausted, though. You’d think I’d stop offering to go to these sorts of things for the BBC, but apparently I can’t help myself.”

Dan smiles at him. “You’re a dedicated worker. It’s a good thing.”

“Not when it takes me away from you guys for weeks at a time,” Phil mumbles petulantly. Dan has to agree there. “Speaking of, where are our kids?”

Nearly three years since the adoption was finalized and Dan still adores the sound of that. “The twins are upstairs, I think doing homework. I was starting dinner when you called.”

“Oh, sorry,” Phil says, smiling sheepishly.

Dan waves him off. “It’s fine. I’m doing stir-fry tonight, it won’t take long anyway.”

Phil nods at this, then asks, “Levi out with Charlotte?”

Dan smiles and nods. “Yeah. They went to see a movie, I think.”

“Did you make sure he had enough money?” Phil asks. He’s always got this perpetual fear that their son will be stranded somewhere with no money and no way home, so Dan’s gotten good at reassuring him.

“Yes,” he says patiently. “I let him borrow the car, and I told him that there’s some in the console if they need it.”

Phil nods, but his face is stricken with another worried look. Dan knows what’s coming before he says it. “Did they wear seatbelts? Are you sure he’s ready to drive on his own? I mean-“

“Babe,” Dan interrupts. “He’s nearly eighteen. He’s passed all his tests, gotten his license, and he’s practiced a lot. He’s earned a little bit of trust, yeah?”

He can tell Phil is still a little nervous and weary, but he nods in agreement. “Okay,” he says with a breath. “I just worry about him.”

Dan looks down, hiding his smile. His husband could be such an anxious mess when his kids were involved. “I know. But he’s fine. They’re fine. Charlotte’s aunt said she could stay the night, so they’ll be back soon, I’m sure.”

“Oh, make sure you make her a separate serving of the stir-fry. She’s still doing the vegetarian thing, and I don’t want her to go hungry,” Phil says.

Dan’s heart clenches. He’s so full of love and that ooey-gooey affection that hasn’t dulled at all over the years.

“Sure,” he agrees with a smile.

“How’s-“ Phil begins to speak, but before he can, a piercing cry comes from the lounge. Dan jumps, and Phil laughs. “Speak of the devil,” he grins.

Dan makes a protesting noise. “Don’t you dare call our daughter a devil,” he chastises playfully.

Phil rolls his eyes. “Go get her, I’ll wait.”

Dan nods and quickly makes his way to the lounge, straight over to where the crying noise is coming from the bassinet in the corner. “Oh, dear,” Dan tuts in a high-pitch voice. Phil makes fun of him when he does that, calling him Winnie the Pooh every time. Dan leans down, smiling at the little bundle resting there, the crying softening to a sniffle when Dan scoops the baby up.

“Shh,” he whispers. “There we go. Daddy’s here, love.” He strokes her little fingers, grinning wetly when she clutches onto his pinky. “Aww, what a sweet thing. Do you wanna see your other Dad? Yes! Let’s go see Dada.”

He’s careful as he makes his way back to the kitchen, and he glances up at the laptop, smiling when he sees the way Phil is beaming at him through the screen. “Hello there,” he coos softly. “Oh, sweet angel. How’s she been today?” His tone shifts when he speaks to Dan, and Dan glances up at him again, having gotten lost in staring at her cute little face.

“She’s been a lot better today. I think Kath was right about the colic,” Dan says, absently stroking her little hand as he rocks her gently.

Phil nods. “So it was probably just gas?” He asks.

“I think so. I gave her a warm bath and did the bicycle thing with her legs earlier and she seems to be loads better now,” Dan replies.

“Good,” Phil says with a smile. “I read somewhere that if they’re still having trouble you can have them lay on their tummies and that might help.”

Dan nods. “I’ll try that if she gets fussy again. But the crying finally stopped, thank god.” He’s not religious but he’s not kidding in his thanks. The crying was literally about to drive him insane.

“I know, babe. I’m sorry I haven’t been there this week,” Phil says, his eyes dropping with something like shame.

Dan wishes he could kiss him right now. “It’s fine, Phil. We’ve been fine.”

“Still...” Phil shrugs. “I wish I would’ve been there.”

Dan smiles. “I know. But next time you will be, yeah? At least the BBC isn’t sending you out all the time these days.”

Phil nods. “Thank god. And thank god that Bryony lets you work from home.”

“I know, right?” Dan grins. He’s still a little over the moon about his career shift, even though he does find himself struggling to do both jobs part-time. But that’s something he won’t let himself worry about now.

The baby gurgles in his arms, and Dan coos at her. “What? Is our baby girl hungry? Hm? Time for din-din?”

“I guess I should probably let you go,” Phil says, sounding sad.

Dan glances up at him, frowning at the thought. He really does miss him a lot. “You don’t have to. Do you want to talk to the kids before you go?”

Phil smiles and nods. “Yeah, I’d love that.”

“Let me go grab them. Hang on,” Dan gently bounces the baby as he goes to the end of the stairs, covering her little ears gently before calling out, “Mia! Jai! Come here for a second!”

There’s some shouts of agreement and then Dan listens to the stampede of little feet as they race down the stairs. Thank god they’d finally moved into a house that they actually own, with neighbors far enough away that they can’t complain about the sounds that fill a house full of children.

Still, old habits die hard, and Dan gives them a look when they reach the bottom. “What did we say about running?” He asks.

The nine-year-olds at least have the decency to look ashamed. “Sorry,” Jaiden says, stepping closer and stroking his baby sister’s cheek with a gentle finger. “Hi, Nat-Nat,” he coos.

Dan smiles at that. “Dad’s on Skype, he wants to talk to you guys,” Dan says, and the words are barely out of his mouth when the twins are barreling off towards the kitchen. He rolls his eyes as he follows after them, mumbling to the baby all the while. “Sure, Daddy’s been feeding them and keeping them alive this week, but as soon as Dada is mentioned, it’s like I’m chopped liver,” he complains with the same baby-voice he always uses when talking to her.

She gurgles and Dan sighs. “You’re right. Dada is the best.”

When he reaches the kitchen again, both kids are hovered by the laptop, rambling about their day. They’re interrupting each other more often than not, but Phil seems to be getting the gist of everything regardless. Dan busies himself with preparing a bottle for Natalie, humming to her as he heats up the water. He smiles and makes faces at her to keep her occupied, and his heart leaps when her lip curls just a little.

“Aren’t you Daddy’s little angel? Hm? Our precious girl?” He says in a sweet voice, smiling when she smacks her lips. “Oh, someone is hungry, huh?”

Apparently Amelia is listening to him, because she pipes up from across the room. “I’m hungry,” she says loudly.

“I know, love, I’m going to start dinner as soon as I feed Nat and put her down for another nap,” Dan replies.

Amelia huffs. She mutters something, and Dan tenses. Things had been a little tense since they brought Natalie home over a month ago, and Amelia was not shy about telling them how much she didn’t want a little sister for the months leading up to Natalie’s birth. Dan hates to think that this is their reality for the rest of forever, Amelia disliking her little sister to the point of contempt, but at this point, he wasn’t sure.

“Amelia,” Dan hears Phil say over the Skype call. He’s using his fatherly warning tone, and Dan is partially relieved. This week has been hell trying to balance four kids and a job (thank god it’s summer and his school counselor tasks were more sparse this time of year) as well as the weird energy Amelia has towards the baby, so it’s a relief for Phil to finally step in.

“I know,” Amelia says with an irritated sigh, rolling her eyes. Dan gives her a look, and she looks down.

“Honey, I know you don’t like this change in our family, but that’s just the way things are now, okay? Natalie is here to stay, and sooner or later you need to figure out how to live with that,” Phil tells her firmly.

Dan’s careful not to say anything. There’s been many times, over the years, where he’s been inclined to argue with Phil over their parenting methods, and there’s been times when those arguments have become proper fights. But they’re working on communication, both with each other and their kids, so this time, he keeps his mouth shut. Honestly, there’s not anything Phil said that he doesn’t agree with, so it’s not a hardship to let him take the lead on this one.

Amelia rubs at her eyes. “Fine,” she says tersely.

Dan’s heart clenches. He hates to see any of his children in pain, and he knows that Amelia isn’t wrong to be upset. A new sibling is an upending of her life, and especially since she’s gone from being the only daughter to just the oldest. He thinks about how he felt, at seven years old, when Adrian was born. He gets it.

“Mia, do you want to help me cook dinner tonight?” Dan asks.

Amelia brightens a little at that. “Can I chop peppers?”

Dan smiles. “You sure can. I need my favorite sous chef if I’m going to feed the masses in an orderly time,” he says with a wink.

She giggles, and he relaxes. Amelia starts to tell Phil about something that had happened earlier that day when Dan took them to the park, and Dan hurries about finishing Natalie’s bottle so he can feed her. She’s starting to get fussy, and he’s bouncing her carefully as he readies the bottle, checking the temperature on his wrist.

“Here we go,” he says softly, tucking the bottle nipple in her mouth. “Good stuff, huh?” He smiles down at her, stroking her soft little cheek. Her eyes drift shut and he allows himself to relax, wandering back over to the laptop and standing behind the kids so he can see Phil again.

“And Daddy said that tomorrow we’re gonna go to the zoo,” Amelia announces proudly.

“Might,” Dan says, emphasizing the word strongly. “I said we might go to the zoo.” He rolls his eyes at Phil, shaking his head in exasperation.

“But Daddy-“ Amelia whines.

Dan’s already shaking his head at her. “Nope, don’t start. I said we might go. Honestly, I don’t know if I can handle toting all three of you around by myself.”

“Toting all three of them around where?” A voice says, interrupting Amelia’s next complaint.

Dan turns around where Levi and Charlotte are walking into the kitchen and smiles at them. “The zoo. Possibly. Hi, Lottie. How was the movie?”

Charlotte shrugs, going to settle on the barstool closest to Amelia, accepting the hug Amelia gives her with a smile. “It was alright. The special effects were horrible. You’re going to hate the ending.”

“No spoilers!” He protests, shaking his head adamantly since he doesn’t have an empty hand to gesture with.

She grins and pretends to zip her lips before turning to the laptop, the Skype call still open. Phil is smiling at them, that goofy kind that Dan knows well. It usually means Phil is thinking about how lucky they are to have this life. Dan understands the feeling.

“Hi, Phil,” Charlotte greets with a little wave.

“Hi,” he waves back with a smile. “Did you guys wear your seatbelts?”

Charlotte nods, but Dan notices her give Levi a pointed look and Levi sighs, pulling out his wallet. Dan watches in amusement as he takes out a couple pounds, handing them to her with a roll of his eyes. When she notices Dan looking at her, Charlotte shrugs, looking only a little bit sheepish. “We had a bet on whether or not one of you would ask us about that,” she explains.

Dan snorts. He turns to Levi, giving him a fake disappointed look. “Probably should’ve seen that one coming, Levi.”

Levi sighs. “I knew that you probably wouldn’t, and I wasn’t counting on Dad being here when we got home.”

“Sorry,” Phil says with a grin.

“Are we ever gonna have dinner?” Amelia wails, interrupting whatever it was Phil was going to say next.

“I’m starving,” Jaiden agrees from beside her. He turns to look at Dan, pouting. “Wouldn’t it be easier to just order pizza?”

Dan looks straight at Phil, giving him a very pointed look. “That one is all yours,” he says, nodding to Jaiden.

Phil at least has the decency to look almost embarrassed. “I mean... he’s got a fair point, babe,” Phil says with a little grin.

Dan sighs. Natalie’s bottle makes a snapping noise and Dan looks down to find she’s only got a couple swallows left in the nipple. He’s careful to watch and pull it out of her mouth before she can start swallowing any air, placing it on the counter to be washed later as he grins at her. “Well done Nat-Nat! You finished all your din-din.”

The baby gurgles at him and Dan smiles as he takes her up to his shoulder, burping her gently. The kids are still talking amongst themselves, but Dan catches Phil watching him through the screen. He smiles helplessly, shrugging at his husband, and Phil grins back.

“I guess I should let you go so you can put her down and start dinner,” Phil says, a resigned sigh in his voice.

Dan hates it, but he’s right. Dan could sit here talking to Phil all evening instead of ever bothering to cook dinner, and with a houseful of hungry children, that’s hardly an option. “Yeah, I guess so,” Dan agrees. “Everyone, say goodnight to Dad, he’s gotta go eat some dinner and get to bed, and so do we.”

The kids all make their noises of complaint but he watches, rocking the baby with a smile, as each of the kids tell Phil goodnight. Dan shoos them all out of the kitchen with Levi’s help, and then it’s just Phil and Dan and the baby.

“I miss you,” Dan says.

Phil smiles. “I miss you more.”

Dan shakes his head, resting his cheek gently against Natalie’s little head. “I seriously doubt that,” he says softly.

“It’s true,” Phil replies, dropping his chin to rest in his hand. “But I’ll be home soon, okay?”

Dan nods. “Right,” he agrees. “I love you.”

Phil blows him a kiss, their usual parting on these calls. “I love you too, bub. I’ll text you later, yeah?”

“Okay. Goodnight. Love you.”

Phil grins when Dan repeats himself. “Goodnight, Dan. I love you. Tell the kids I’ll be home soon.”

“Of course. Bye,” he says, waving for a second before the screen goes black. He sighs, looking down at Natalie’s sweet, sleepy little face. “I can’t wait for your other Dad to come home, munchkin. This one needs a break and a good snuggle.”

She smacks her lips and closes her eyes and Dan smiles, rolling his eyes. “I know, your life is so hard, being a baby. Let’s get you down for another nap, love.”

~~~

The next night, Dan wakes up from a deep sleep to warm breath on his neck. At first he’s confused, grunting as he tries to roll over, but a heavy weight around his waist stops him. “What the...”

“Shh,” a deep and unmistakable voice murmurs in his ear. “‘M tryin’ sleep.”

Suddenly, Dan is wide awake, rolling over quickly despite the protests from his husband. “Phil,” he breathes, warm and happy.

Phil blinks at him, a goofy, exhausted smile on his face. “Hi,” he says sheepishly.

Dan wraps himself around Phil immediately, peppering kisses to everywhere he can reach. “I missed you,” he kisses across Phil’s brow bone, feeling Phil’s breath on his collarbones. “So much.”

“I missed you too,” Phil replies with a little laugh, kissing at Dan’s throat.

Something occurs to Dan then and he pulls away, staring at Phil with a furrowed brow. “I thought you weren’t coming home until tomorrow.” He doesn’t mean to, but he can’t help but be a little accusatory. He wanted to make sure the house was clean, maybe do some laundry. Just the sort of husband things one did when they were in the best relationship of their life.

Phil gives him a sheepish smile. “I changed my flight so I could come home early and surprise you.”

Dan feels so much all at once, it reminds him of how it was in the early days, before the kids, before the fostering, before they even knew that they had feelings for each other. It’s overwhelming for a moment, and then Phil is tilting his chin, guiding their mouths together in a perfect kiss.

“Mm,” Dan hums against his lips. “I love you.”

Phil laughs. “Love you more.” His hand slips down Dan’s waist, his fingertips dipping just under the hand of Dan’s pants. Dan is hit with a wave of arousal so strong, and it’s not lost on him that it’s been more than a month since they had proper sex. He loved Natalie more than life itself, but raising a baby on top of the three children they already had was proving to be much more difficult than they’d anticipated. But after all they’d been through, the strain of no sex was nothing they couldn’t handle. After all, they’d gone ten years without it before.

Still, he’s only human, and when his husband is petting the soft skin at his hip, he can only react like any mortal man would. “Baby,” he sighs.

“Hm?”

It hits Dan what he’d just said, and he quickly remembers the other inhabitant of this room. “Phil. Phil, the baby,” he mumbles, tapping Phil’s arm.

“Already took care of her,” Phil replies back, kissing at Dan’s jaw.

“What? When?” Dan asks, pushing him back a bit.

Phil smiles. “When I got home. You were already asleep so I checked on the kids and then took Nat downstairs for a bottle and some cuddles.”

“Oh.” The image of that, of Phil coming in late and taking their baby down for her midnight bottle, is nearly enough to make Dan cry and definitely enough to turn him off. “Well, thank you for that, but I don’t think I feel like fooling around tonight, if that’s okay.”

Phil pecks him on the cheek with a little giggle. “Of course that’s okay, you idiot. I didn’t just come home early for that, you know. I mostly missed having my little space heater,” he says with a grin.

Dan rolls his eyes, but can’t help the way he smiles and leans in for another kiss. “Sometimes I think you only married me for my good looks and my stupidly hot body temperature.”

Phil kisses him back, but he’s smiling so hard that it’s sloppy. “Oh for sure. Those were my top two requirements for a husband. Is hot, runs hot.”

Dan snorts. “Right. So, father of your children was somewhere further down that list, I’m assuming?”

“Something like that,” Phil teases.

“You’re such an idiot,” Dan smiles, kissing Phil’s cheek before snuggling in for the night.

“But I’m your idiot,” Phil says in a stupid, sleepy voice.

Dan smiles, pressing one last kiss to Phil’s chest. “Always.”

[buddyhollyscurls]

FADE IN:

THE DAVIS FAMILY LIVING ROOM - MORNING 

A nearly vacant room. The only remnants are a sofa and a few moving boxes placed neatly 

on the floor. It is quiet and still - an almost unnerving silence that makes it easy to forget that the house once held a family. Suddenly the front door bursts open and the house is brimming with activity once more. GREGORY DAVIS is accompanied by his wife CHARLOTTE DAVIS. She is carrying their infant daughter GRACE. At her heels is her daughter HEATHER. Heather is a lively and energetic two year old, and she takes great pleasure in the empty space by running around like a plane. She races back to the door at the same time one of the movers is coming through the door, nearly knocking her over. He quickly halts and nearly loses his balance but stops just in time for Heather to avoid him. He balances himself on the doorframe and Heather takes it in stride. She laughs and carries on racing around the house - much to the annoyance of her mother who witnessed the near - collision. She places Grace on her opposite hip and grabs Heather when she flies past her. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Heather Margaret Davis you settle down! These men are trying to finish up 

with the boxes and you nearly topple this man over. Apologize to him right now.

Heather turns to the mover and looks down at her shoes. 

HEATHER

I’m sorry, mister. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Oh, let her have a little fun. She’s just excited about the move, is all. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Greg, she nearly ran into one of the men and hurt herself. 

GREGORY DAVIS

No harm done. Let’s just focus on the big day!

Charlotte lets out a long sigh, but smiles and nods at her husband. He helps the movers with the last of their things. When the house is completely vacant she stands for a moment gazing at the kitchen. She turns and notices her oldest daughter AMY standing at the door.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Honey, is everything ok?

Amy takes a beat before looking up at her mother. 

AMY

Mama, do we have to move?

CHARLOTTE

Oh, sweetie. I know it’s scary moving to a new house. But you’ll like it there. I 

promise! You’ll have a bigger room, more toys, a bigger backyard. 

AMY

But I like it here. We don’t need a bigger house. Why did Daddy want a new 

house, anyway? Wasn’t he happy here?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Of course he was. But isn’t it nice that Daddy was able to get us a new house?

AMY

I want to stay here. We were okay here. Mama, do you really want to move?

Charlotte smiles softly at her daughter but doesn’t answer. She gently takes Amy’s hand and leads her out to the car. 

GREGORY DAVIS

About time you ladies joined us. What took so long?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

We were just… saying goodbye to the house.

GREGORY DAVIS

Don’t worry. The girls are going to love the new place.

He starts the car and begins to drive. Charlotte gazes out at the house with a frown on her face. She keeps the house in her sights until it is no longer in view. She then glances at Amy through her rearview mirror. She sighs softly and feels her husband grab her hand. He gives it a gentle squeeze. Charlotte turns to him and plasters a smile on her face. 

THE NEW DAVIS HOME - LATER:

The family arrives at their new home and all three of the children are sleeping. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Girls… girls! Wake up! We’re at the new house!

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Oh, Greg, let the girls sleep! It’s been a long day for all of us. 

GREGORY DAVIS

But I want them to see the house! And to pick out their rooms!

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

So they’ll see it when they wake up. Come on, just have the movers put in the 

sofa first so the girls can nap there. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Well, what about Gracie? We can’t have her sleeping on the sofa and have her fall over, now can we?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

No, Greg, of course not. I can just lay a blanket down for her on the floor by her sisters. She’ll be alright. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Oh… alright. You win, Lottie. I’ll help them bring in the sofa. 

Charlotte wrinkles her nose at him and sits with the girls as Gregory and the movers bring in the sofa. She waits until Gregory returns to the car and helps her settle the girls in the living room. She puts the girls down and looks around the house. Gregory grabs her hand and shows her to the different rooms. 

GREGORY DAVIS (CONT’D)

Well, honey. This is it. What do you think?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Well… it certainly is spacious. 

GREGORY DAVIS

I know! The kids are going to love it! More space to run around in. You can 

garden in the backyard. We could even get a dog! 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

No! Definitely no dogs. I already have my hands full with the girls. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Oh, you’re no fun. But can’t you see us all being happy here?

Charlotte takes a beat before answering.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Yes, darling. Of course.

THE DAVIS FAMILY KITCHEN - THE NEXT MORNING

Charlotte hums lightly to herself as she pours coffee into the coffee maker. She sets about making breakfast when she hears a knock at the door. She makes her way to the door and opens it to find a young woman dressed in a domestic servant outfit. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS (CONT’D)

Oh! Good morning. May I help you?

KATHERINE

Yes, good morning, ma’am. My name is Katherine. Is this the Davis 

residence? I’m the new maid you hired.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

This is the Davis residence, yes. But I’m sorry we didn’t hire a maid. Are you 

sure the name was Davis?

KATHERINE 

Yes, ma’am. I was hired by a Mr. Gregory Davis. 

CHARLOTTE

That’s my husband. But he never told me about - 

Charlotte stops talking when she hears Gregory bounding down the stairs. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Honey, which tie do you think would be best to wear on my first day - 

He pauses his sentence when he notices Katherine at the door. 

GREGORY DAVIS (CONT’D)

Ah, you must be Katherine! Hello, good morning! I was hoping you’d arrive 

before I left. Come in, come in. I see you already met my wife Charlotte. 

Katherine smiles, nods and enters the house. 

KATHERINE

Yes, I have Mr. Davis. Good morning. 

GREGORY DAVIS

Let us show you around the house.

Katherine slowly begins to follow him when Grace begins to cry. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Oh, dear. Gracie woke up. Greg, do you mind helping me with her?

GREGORY DAVIS

You can handle it. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Please. Come help me, Gregory. 

Gregory reluctantly agrees and excuses himself from Katherine. Charlotte quickly smiles at her but says nothing. They go upstairs and Charlotte grabs Grace from her crib. 

GREGORY DAVIS

What’s going on? Why did you want my help?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Honey, you hired a maid?

GREGORY DAVIS

Yeah, what’s wrong? 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

I just - you never told me anything. Can we even afford it?

GREGORY DAVIS

Well, with the new house I figured you could use the help. She’ll only be here 

a few times a week. Besides, have you seen this neighborhood? I bet most 

people here have a maid.  Why are you upset about this? I thought you’d be 

thrilled to get some help.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

It’s just… a surprise, that’s all. I wish you would have talked to me about this. I mean I don’t know how I feel about a stranger being in the house with the 

kids..

GREGORY DAVIS

Oh, Lottie. She’s a young girl. The kids are going to be completely safe. And 

think of it this way, now you have more time for yourself. You can relax, start 

that garden you always wanted, go shopping.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Well…

Gregory kisses her head with a smile, takes Grace, and heads back downstairs. Charlotte can hear him showing Katerine around the house. She sighs and heads downstairs with a smile fixed on her face. She goes to the kitchen, pours herself a cup of coffee and makes breakfast. When Gregory leaves for work Charlotte begins putting the dishes in the sink. She begins to wash them.

KATHERINE

Oh, ma’am don’t worry about the dishes. I can wash them.

Katherine quickly takes fresh gloves and begins washing the dishes. 

CHARLOTTE 

Well, then… I guess I can just worry about finishing unpacking the boxes. 

KATHERINE

Oh, I can finish when I’m done with these. Mr. Davis specifically asked me to 

help with that today.  

CHARLOTTE

Oh! Well, thank you, Katherine. 

KATHERINE

Of course, Mrs. Davis. 

Charlotte goes into the living room and sits down on the sofa. Her leg begins to lightly jiggle. She brings her hand up to her mouth and almost bites her nails but catches herself before she does so. She goes upstairs and checks in on the girls who are all napping. She goes into her room and reads a book, ignoring that her leg is still jiggling.

THE DAVIS LIVING ROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT

Charlotte is on the couch with Grace on her lap. Amy and Heather are playing on the floor beside her. They hear Gregory’s car pull in and they hurry to look out the window.

AMY

Daddy’s home! And he brought something big!

Charlotte gets up and looks out the window herself. She sees Gregory struggling to carry a large box. She opens the door. 

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Greg, what on Earth?

He places the box in front of the sofa.

GREGORY DAVIS 

Girls guess what? Daddy has a surprise for you!

He opens the box and reveals a television set. The girls squeal with excitement.

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Gregory, you bought a television?

GREGORY DAVIS

Yeah, isn’t it great! It’s the newest kind, too. The girls are gonna love seeing the Flintstones.

And you may even like the Donna Reed show. What do you say girls, want to help daddy set it up?

The girls cry out in agreement. Charlotte stands in silence until Gregory looks up at her.

GREGORY DAVIS (CONT'D)

What’s wrong, honey?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Gregory, first a maid and now a television set?

GREGORY DAVIS

Oh, honey, lighten up. Tv’s are the new thing I bet everyone around here has 

got one. Why are you getting so worked up about this?

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

Well, I’d wish you’d talk to me before you make these big purchases. Can we really afford all this?

GREGORY DAVIS

Let me worry about that. Come on, honey, enjoy it!

CHARLOTTE DAVIS

I just… I don’t think I want the girls growing up with a television. I don’t want to see them with this darn thing on all day. 

GREGORY DAVIS

We’ll keep an eye on them. Anyway, now they have something to help keep them occupied. I bet you’ll enjoy it after a while.

Charlotte lets out a long sigh but smiles when the girls look up at her. She gazes at Gregory as he and the girls play with the television. 

THE DAVIS KITCHEN - THE NEXT MORNING

Charlotte sits at the table with a cup of coffee and her book while Katherine is wiping down the counters. She hears Grace start to cry. She begins to get up but Katherine puts up a hand to stop her. 

KATHERINE 

Please, Mrs. Davis, let me. That’s what I’m here for. 

Charlotte slowly follows Katherine to the living room and watches her climb up the stairs. When Graces’ cries have stopped she sits down on the sofa. Her hands make her way up to her mouth, her leg jittering in place. She quickly steadies herself and turns on the tv. 

THE LIVING ROOM - A FEW YEARS LATER

Charlotte is sitting on the couch watching tv. 

[lit-in-thy-heart]

you know what, what's the point of being on this platform if you don't get to bellow into the void about your interests in the hope of finding someone with the same interest?

in light of this, let me inflict a lowdown of the victorian literature (mostly novels because poetry is difficult to collate) that i've read for my module this year upon my mutuals

i'll do a separate one for vampire novels and reblog with the link

because what are the victorians without vampires? straight

bleak house (dickens): what a ride that was! yes, it was nearly a thousand pages and, yes, some chapters i was like can we move on please, but that's dickens for you. honestly, i loved it. if you're looking for thinly-veiled lesbianism, this is the book for you (esda all the way, if they even have a ship name). unfortunately i already knew one of the plot twists due to watching dickensian five years before, but there are plenty more to go around! if you can get through the first chapter describing nothing but fog and the law courts, you're in for one hell of a treat -- just don't google anything about it until you've finished because you will get spoiled (or don't share a house with me, where i'll tell you the entire plot as i'm reading it). definitely recommend, but marking it down for the heteronormativity with allan. (9.5/10)

villette (c. brontë): where to fucking start. i, quite frankly, do not care for charlotte brontë, and when reading the earlier novel agnes grey by anne, i could see some more things that charlotte has filched for this travesty. no victorian novel is going to be without problems, but this one was xenophobic, ableist and, of course, racist. the protagonist doesn't really give anything away, which is meant to make her more mysterious, but it just renders her an empty vessel. oh, and she tells you stuff that she's figured out waaaaaay after she says she's figured it out, a bit like she's allowing you to feel smart for making a connection before going 'oh yeah i knew that like twelve chapters ago, keep up'. some of the passages are really striking and there's maybe one character who's likeable but that's about it. i'd say it's more a story of omission than repression tbh. (4/10)

janet's repentance (eliot): wait, have i even finished this? no, no, i have not. it's fine, i wasn't going to tell you the ending anyway. i did get hooked eventually, there were just a LOT of names thrown around in the first few chapters, and a word that i didn't know was used frequently (turns out it was a name for the followers of this guy). i did get strong hester prynne/arthur dimmesdale vibes from some of the main characters, but janet is a very sympathetic character which, after reading villette, was nice. slightly depressing in some places, but a good enough read if you're not cramming it in the day before your tutorial, because it is mildly dense. (7/10)

the wonderful adventures of mrs seacole in many lands (seacole): not what i'd been expecting to read on my module, what with it being a biography, but enjoyable nonetheless. horrible histories lied to me, though, she was in her 40s/50s when she treated people in the crimean war, not in her 20s, but that's minor. it was actually quite funny??? like she was very reluctant to give away to give away her age and almost slipped up a couple of times, and also made some very biting remarks about people who were passing comment on her skin colour. for a biography, it wasn't hugely biographical, in that she was married for what seemed all of five minutes before her husband died, when in fact they were married for several years, but if you want an in-depth depiction of war, this is for you. not what i'd usually read, but some of the descriptions are so vivid that it does read like a novel in places, though sometimes the descriptions were so detailed that i did tune out at odd intervals. (9/10)

the happy prince and other stories (wilde): if you're feeling low, don't read these. don't. especially not 'the nightingale and the rose', because that was honestly heartbreaking. really well-written, some passages were just beautiful, i just wasn't in the right headspace to fully appreciate it. it also has a lot of death, i should probably explicitly say that. (8/10)

agnes grey (a. brontë): chef's kiss, honestly. if i'd read this last year then i think it definitely would have hit a lot harder, what with agnes moving away from home for the first time and struggling with loneliness around people who she is different from. beautifully written, i'm irritated at myself for not reading it sooner, even though i've owned a copy for about four years or so. agnes does come across as a bit wet sometimes, but those moments are rare and far between, she's overall a resilient character who is trying to make her own way in the world. seeing as i managed to get through the whole thing and didn't lose focus on what i was reading, i rate it higher than jane eyre (which is a rip-off of this anyway). we stan anne. though i am marking it down for the underdeveloped romantic relationship that just pops up (9.5/10)

now for some old classics that weren't taught on my module, but i can't not mention them

a tale of two cities (dickens): this was my first dickens book and oh my word what a book. yeah, okay, lucie is a bit of a wet dishcloth and has basically no personality, but there is definitely something there between her and her maid. sydney is my baby and oh so gorgeously dramatic ("you have kindled me, heap of ashes that i am, into fire"), which was perfect for the pangs of unrequited love. the plot is slightly confusing, and you don't really understand everything until right near the end, but i loved finding parallels in the chapters set in france with the chapters set in britain. oh and the showdown between miss pross and madame defarge is wonderful. i had a tradition of reading it on the run-up to christmas, just because that was the period when i read it for the first time, but i haven't done that for the past two years just because of exams and stuff. now, bleak house just pips it at the post, but i still love it dearly. (9/10)

wuthering heights (e. brontë): i couldn't review victorian literature and not include this. there are very strong similarities between this and villette (seems charlotte really drew on her sisters' work), particularly in terms of me not liking a single one of the characters except hareton. everyone is called cathy. literally. and heathcliff/cathy one is a toxic ship that should not be boarded. it is obsession, not love. the second volume is basically a repeat of the first one, thus showing that humanity will never move past its vices and will be caught in a vicious cycle of self-destruction for the rest of time. again, though, beautifully and vividly written. the characters are the type that you love to hate. (8/10)

the tenant of wildfell hall (a. brontë): what. a. book. this was a book that was simultaneously loved and condemned as scandalous when it came out. there's mystery, there's a woman escaping a horrible situation and making her own living, and there's a well-developed relationship! and the characters are likeable (i love rose, she's great, completely goes off at her brother when she has to do things for him all the time), which always puts it onto a winner. there's one chapter with gilbert that i have to skip just because i hate what he does in it. there are quite a lot of religious references, with redemption playing a huge part in the novel, but even the religious views brontë expresses went against a lot of the teachings of the anglican church at the time. do i even need to say that it's beautifully written if it's anne? marking it down for gilbert's behaviour and arguable control of helen's narrative. (9.5/10)

far from the madding crowd (hardy): i love this book. a little more uplifting than tess but still with the drama and murder you'd expect from hardy. maybe my review is influenced by my tiny crush on bathsheba: she's not the best role model but damn what a woman. gabriel isn't quite bae but i love him all the same, i'm so glad he's happy in the end. (9/10)

[dontshootmespence]

Through It All

Part 27

Summary: Now married, Spencer & Y/N navigate the D/s lifestyle. How will their relationship change?

Words: 1,923

Warnings: Anxiety.

A/N: No smut, just fluff!

The birth parents, Ai Campbell and Kyle Richardson, could meet you and Spencer and decide that they didn’t like you as much as they thought, so instead of telling your parents or Diana about the possible new babies, BABIES, you just ask your parents to babysit Charlotte while you have a date day.

Once Charlie’s out the door with your parents you start to get shaky, your legs barely able to hold up your weight. Spencer wraps you in his arms. “In through your nose and out through your mouth. We can do this.”

“What if they don’t like us?” You ask as loudly as your voice can muster. You feel so small, so scared. Your hopes are already up.

Spencer takes a deep breath, clearly a little on edge himself and chuckles. “Well, one, they’d be wrong. We’re amazing. And two, like you said before, it’s either meant to be or it’s not, but we’ll get through it.”

“I want these babies, Spence.”

Reaching into your bag, he pulls out your hairbrush. “We have a few minutes before we have to go. Turn around and close your eyes.”

His instructions pull you away from your thoughts for a moment so you turn around and do as he says, smiling softly when he pulls the brush through your hair. “This always relaxes you.”

“It does.” Nothing puts you at ease more than having your hair brushed.

Minutes flow into hours, at least your body believes it. When you’re finally peaceful, Spencer taps three times on your shoulder and whispers that it’s time to go. As his hand slips into yours, you swallow back your fear and hope for the best.

---

Cradle of Hope practically crackles with electricity. The moment is now. On the way over, Minnie called to let you know that Ai and Kyle were there a little early and excited to meet you both.

Spencer parks the car and comes to your side to open the door, taking your hands in his. “Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.” He repeats himself two more times before asking if you’re ready to do this.

You breathe calmly. “Let’s go.”

Inside, Minnie ushers you in and preps you both that way Spencer had prepped you. She just tells you to be yourselves. “Because if they fall in love with who you are, the people right in front of them, you’ll probably get chosen. It’s when people are closed off that these kinds of meetings don’t go well.

After a quick introduction via Minnie, she leaves the four of you alone. Ai is barely showing, but she has her hand on her stomach anyway, clearly protective. Just as you are, she’s a little nervous, but Kyle and Spencer take the lead and introduce themselves. “How are you?” Spencer asks. “Ai, how are you feeling?”

“A little morning sickness,” she replies. “But nothing too horrible just yet.” Sitting down on the couch, she cuddles into Kyle, clearly they’re on the same page about this and they love each other. In terms of birth parents, if they choose you, you couldn’t be luckier. “Minnie just said that we should get to know each other. We’ve read your file, but maybe you could tell us a little bit about your lives.”

Spencer gives your hand a squeeze. Your nervous energy is now his, so you tell Ai and Kyle all about how you met at a bar and fell hard and fast for Spencer. He smiles at your words and pulls you close. “We’ve been married for a couple years now and have a beautiful little girl named Charlotte Magnolia. We call her Charlie for the most part. Occasionally Maggie and Spencer calls her little flower.”

“She is,” Spencer continues. “I used to work for the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit as a profiler. After nearly 20 years with the Bureau, I decided to start teaching and consulting on occasion so I could be home with Y/N. Best decision I ever made after asking her out and asking her to marry me.”

“Stop, you guys are so cute,” Ai laughs. “Okay, so Kyle and I are really intent on these babies being adopted together. We want them to be wanted by whoever adopts them. Not just they’ll take two because they don’t want to lose the opportunity for one, if you know what I mean?”

“I do,” you reply. “I would be lying if I said that taking on two babies at once didn’t scare the ever-living shit out of me-”

“Me too.” Spencer nods vigorously.

Laughing, you continue. “But we want them both. Having them will complete the family we’ve always wanted.”

Kyle leans forward and opens his mouth, hesitant at first. “Can I ask why you want to adopt when you do have a biological child? Do you think you’ll feel any differently about her as opposed to them.”

Spencer responds immediately, ensuring them that children are children and if they choose you, those babies will be your children in all ways but one.

“As for why adoption, I’ve always wanted to adopt. And although I love the result of my pregnancy, the pregnancy itself was taxing on my body and to be truthful it’s not something I want to put my body through again.”

“With all this morning sickness, I feel you.” Ai takes a sip of water and pulls Kyle back into the couch so she can lean on him. Nearly an hour passes as you trade stories. Almost nothing about the adoption itself, just random stories that allow you to get a feel for who everyone is as people. “Do you have any questions for us?”

Spencer wrings his hands together and leans up, having slouched into the couch over the course of the last hour. “We do. Umm, what made you pick us to meet out of all the files you read?”

“We both like the fact that you already have a baby.” Ai rubs her stomach, a somewhat sad smile crawling across her lips. “I guess it gives us the assurance that you’d be good parents, because you already are. We also liked your FBI background, Spencer. We feel like they’d be safe, which is all we want. Safe and happy and-”

Without meaning to, Kyle cuts her off. “Sorry, babe. We really liked the way you spoke about each other. Kind of reminded us of us. We’ve been together since high school. And although we would like these babies, we don’t feel as if we can give them the life they deserve while still working to cement our own lives.” The last few words catch in his throat and Ai begins to hold back tears.

“How involved would you want to be post-adoption?” You ask shakily. You feel for them. Though you want these babies, you feel awful that they do too and just aren’t in a place to provide for them. “Do you want updates?”

“We’d definitely love updates,” Kyle says, squeezing Ai’s hand. “As often as you would be comfortable. Possibly visits, again if that would be okay with you. But those don’t have to be as often. Probably couldn’t be, especially while in college. Is that something you’d both be okay with?”

Nodding, you reach across the table separating the two couches and wrap your arms around Ai’s neck. She’s full on crying now. You don’t know what else to say, so you tell her it’s going to be okay and no matter what happens things are going to work out. “We definitely want them to know that they’re lucky enough to have four parents that love them.”

Kyle pulls Ai in for a hug and soon enough you’re all at least a little bit teary eyed. There seem to be a few whispers between them before he responds. “Ai, yea?”

She nods.

“We choose you. We want you guys.”

Your quiet stream of tears becomes a raging waterfall. “Thank you,” You cry. “We promise they’ll never doubt how much they’re loved.”

---

Once it truly settles in that you’ve been chosen the panic starts to settle in. Less than a year from now, your little family of three will become a family of five. Two newborns at once? Twice as many bills? Three children under the age of three? It’s both exciting and vomit-inducing. Obviously, it’s what you and Spencer both want, but you will have to go through that period of uncertainty again, where you question every decision you make as a parent and a human being.

For nearly a month, you and Spencer busy yourselves with reconfiguring the apartment to accommodate two babies. There’s a small office across the apartment where you move Charlotte, so that her old bedroom, the larger room, can hold two cribs. In the midst of trying to put everything together you have a little bit of a breakdown about how cluttered everything feels, which leads to you and Spencer discussing the possibility of a move into the suburbs once the babies are ready to transfer into big kid beds.

So much is happening at once and despite wanting to take your time with each other, quickies in the morning become the norm. Eventually, you’ll both settle into the building anticipation and get back to your preferred sexual routines, but neither of you can focus at the moment and with all the preparations and nervousness you’re too tired to do anything but snuggle.

“Should we tell Charlie about the babies?” You ask, basking in the afterglow for a brief moment before pushing yourself up. “I mean I know Ai and Kyle could still back out, but I have a good feeling.”

“And we don’t want to leave her blindsided anway,” Spencer says, pulling on his flannel pajama pants. “How about over breakfast?”

In agreement, you grab Charlie from her room and let her pick an outfit before bringing her out to the table, where Spencer already has some eggs ready for her. “Charlie, Mommy and Daddy have something special to tell you,” Spencer starts, his voice constricting. Somehow, through all the unsubs he talked down and all the times you and he have done everything under the sun, he finds himself at a loss for words in front of your barely two year old.

Crouching down, you meet her at her level and hold her little hand. “There’s a mommy out there, kind of like me, who has two babies in her belly. But she can’t take care of them, so she asked Daddy and I to take care of them. You’re going to be a big sister.”

Try reading a 21-month-old. It’s hard. Even Spencer looks baffled, though it looks like the gears in Charlie’s sweet little head are turning. “Babies?” She asks pointing to your stomach.

“Not my belly, baby. They’re in another lady’s belly and she needs help so the babies are going to come here and be your little brothers or sisters.”

A small smile forms on her face. “I help?”

“You can absolutely help with the babies!” You say excitedly, thankful that her reaction wasn’t worse or even non-existent. “You’re going to be a great big sister.”

Without a word, she jumps off her seat at the table and runs into her room only to come out moments later with a baby doll in hand. “I help.”

Bending down, you kiss the top of her head and pick her up, sandwiching her between yourself and Spencer. “Best big sister ever,” he whispers.

@heycasbutt @ultrarebelheart @katherineisagubler @proud-slytherin-ghost @randomwriter23 @fandom-queen67 @sixx-sic-sixx @xqueenofthecraziesx @aofay02 @groovyreid @criesinreid @jdougl-love @xreider @cringeemospntrashassbutt @prettyboyeffect @prettyboyreid @themanip @spencerreidsthings @augustgraceful @whollytaciturn @prisonreid @factualfic @jasmine-negron @snitchthewitch @ellabobella051419 @crazyforsstuff @kaatelyyynn​ @jane-dough @dreatine @bitter-post-millennial @adlerorzel-blog @hallieedrew @psychedelephantt @krisymccall996 @4ueijos @mclaujac @ray-likes-starwars @nurseemilyblog @slightlyvicked @she4567 @guesswhosback129 @princessdolan @happycreatorfangirl @fallwhisper @nyemadowell @sammy-jo1977 @sin-bin-and-tragedies @imsuperawkward @ahhahahaheehee @crispygiantsaladgarden @reputay-swift @pizzarollsfordayz @andiebeaword @timey-wimey-lovi @garbagecanfics @friedparadisetale @dereksbetaa @idontevenknow2 @holyfishloverfarm @nohemi2500 @typeshitbih @sadgirlhan @kmc217 @bigbuttsowhatuniverse @charmedfandomgal @im--blushing @dangerouspersonllamabagel @fichoe21 @yes-sir-hotchner @thefandomallrounder @mrsenos08 @walkerchick007 @letsdisneythings @winchesterqueenie @specialagentleigh @spn-wheresthepie @haileymew @bitchyoulied @geniusgub @urdicksmol @6lack6erry @slutlanna976 @downondilaudid​ @baileysb1tch @la-vie-en-amour1​ @letsdoit-tomorrow @eideticprettyboydrreid​ @lazynoodledragon​ @shybaby231 @aimzonicles97​ @grace-superpowers​ @softestlavender​ @ssa-dr-ladylock​ @drprettyboy​ @patricks-fabulous-face​ @tearosaria​ @shxdowofdarkness​ @marvels-gurl​ @gublergirls​

[wkemeup]

Okay but what was Bucky saying about y/n to Steve and Peggy before they met her 😂

I’m With You - Masterlist

“You need to talk me off a ledge, Steve.”

Bucky stood in line behind a dozen angry passengers boarding a 3am flight to Atlanta, all tapping their toes incessantly and trying to peak up and over the shoulders of those ahead of them in hopes of getting on the plane faster, but Bucky would have much rather his flight have been canceled entirely.

“What’s going on?” Steve replied with a yawn.

Bucky could hear the tiredness in his friend’s voice, the soft rustle of the bed sheets and the click of the lamp. He felt a sharp stab of guilt, just realizing what hour it was, but he was sure he was going to collapse into a heap of himself if he didn’t talk to someone. This night couldn’t have possibly been real and if he didn’t tell Steve, he was sure might find a way to convince himself it was all a dream.

“Is that Bucky?” he heard a quiet voice mumble through the phone; English accent laced with sleep. “Put him on speaker, love.”

“You’ve got both of us now, punk,” Steve said and Peggy whispered a quick ‘hello.’ Bucky gritted his teeth and before he could offer an apology, Steve added, “you better start talking before we fall back asleep.”

A passenger shoved Bucky hard in the shoulder, pushing past him when he didn’t take the two steps ahead of him fast enough to keep up with the line. He let the man go without complaint.

Bucky realized then, he couldn’t talk about his sister; not with the anxiety peaking again and rushing through his veins like rapids. It only seemed to calm when you were with him and he didn’t know how that was possible, to have just met someone hours earlier and for his entire world to be dropped upside down like this.

But it was and it had been. And now, he was in trouble.

“There’s, um, there’s a girl.”

Silence. A pause, then, “a girl?”

“Yeah, Steve, a girl,” Bucky snapped. “Stop making me feel like I’m in middle school.”

“Hey you’re the one calling me at 3am over a girl, Buck!”

“Boys, stop it,” Peggy snipped, a light thump through the speaker as she swatted Steve’s arm before she let out a sigh. “Bucky hasn’t so much as mentioned a girl or anyone in three years, so give him a break, darling.” Then, to Bucky, sweetly, “tell us about her.”

Had it really been three years since he landed stateside again? It felt like longer than that and yesterday all at the same time. 

There were pieces of him could still feel the gravel under his back when he slept at night and he still found himself glancing over his shoulder for threats in shopping malls, sneaking around corners at his office building, constantly vigilant. The other half of him felt like it was a lifetime away, like he’d been this isolated, shell of himself for decades, like he hadn’t used the muscles in his cheeks in a millennium.

He swallowed, shoving a hand into his pocket and letting a family of five behind him cut the line. He wasn’t ready to get on this plane just yet. The bag of skittles in his pocket were heavy as stones.

“You remember the stupid shit I used to do with Bec in Charlotte?”

“Is that why you’re callin’ so late?” Steve asked, his voice considerably softer and Bucky wondered how much Peggy’s silent stare had to do with that. “Your flight get canceled?”

“Yeah,” Bucky sighed, pinching at the bridge of his nose, “but it’s back on. I’m boarding now.”

Another silence took over and Bucky wondered if they could hear his heart pounding through the phone.

He glanced back at the long line of people behind him and resided to simply step to the side. He was letting just about everyone pass him by anyway, might as well be the last one to board. He took a deep breath.

“The girl, Bucky,” Peggy reminded him gently.

“Right.” Bucky scratched at the back of his head, finding that his eyes kept drifting down the terminal in search of you, though he knew it was foolish. You had a flight to catch, too. How could he possibly miss you this much? It ached in his bones. It burned like a fire.

So, he told Steve and Peggy everything.

He told them about how you’d been the only other person in the terminal to smile in relief when the cancellations starting rolling in. He told them about the man in the suit who spilled your coffee all over you and how you’d been so patient and kind to the gate agent who looked to be about seconds away from tears.

He told them about how when he was faced with the possibility that you might just walk right out of his life right then and there, he’d done something he hadn’t done in years and asked to buy you coffee. He told them how adorable you’d looked because you were so surprised, shocked even, and he’d let himself flirt for the first time since he’d been home from the desert.

He told them about sitting in the coffeeshop people-watching past when the café was supposed to close and how he’d dragged you into cartwheels at midnight.

“Cartwheels?” Steve gaped. “Seriously, Buck? She must have thought you were completely insane.”

“She did,” Bucky confirmed, a slight laugh in his voice. He didn’t even realize he was smiling. He didn’t notice the nerves left his body.

“How terrible was it? You hadn’t done one of those since your layovers with Becca when you were sixteen. I bet it was awful,” Steve teased, though it was followed by a short grunt and Bucky was certain Peggy must have shoved him hard in the side for that. Bucky grinned.

“Don’t pay attention to him,” Peggy said. “Then, what happened?”

Then, Bucky told them about how you didn’t give him your name until almost an hour later and while he played it cool, it drove him impossibly insane. He told them how he took you to get snacks at the store Charlie worked at – yes, that old man is still alive, Steve! – and then, about how you’d told him the reason you were going to Atlanta in the first place.

“Oh, that poor girl,” Peggy sighed.

Bucky could still picture the look on your face; the genuine belief that you were somehow not worthy of this jerk of an ex-boyfriend and he couldn’t understand it. You were impossibly kind and funny and so stunningly beautiful; Bucky could hardly keep his heart in check around you.

He told them how he tried to explain his situation with Becca to you, how it came out as a jumbled mess, how easily you changed the subject without hesitation and the relief he felt at that.

Then, he told them about the questions over giant checkers and Steve teased him relentlessly, despite Peggy swatting him again, telling Bucky, ‘well I think it’s sweet and Steve could learn a thing from you.’

It felt like a month’s worth of time sat in the span of a few hours and Bucky found himself leaning up against the wall, watching the grumbling passengers make their way to the plane, a smile aching in his cheeks the longer he talked about you.

By the time he got to the end of the story, about how he’d just barely kissed you before the damn intercom went off, alerting you to your flights that were dangerously close to boarding, there were only a few stragglers left in the line.

“Y/n sounds lovely,” Peggy said after a moment. “So, why the ledge?”

Bucky sighed, slowly making his way to the very back of the line. “I don’t know. Maybe I was too much, you know? I don’t remember how to do this stuff. I feel like I dumped all my baggage on a woman I’ve known for a few hours and I fucked it all up.“

“Come on, man, I don’t think that’s true,” Steve said reassuringly, all tracing of the teasing nature leaving his voice. “It sounds like she likes you. I mean, who else would put up with cartwheels in the middle of the airport?”

Bucky found himself chuckling under his breath despite himself. He handed the gate agent his ticket and they pushed out a tight-lipped smile, nodding for him to continue down the gateway.

“She’s really something, Steve. I don’t know the last time I felt like myself and when I was with her… I don’t know, it was easy again, like all this stuff with Bec never happened and I never enlisted. I was laughing and smiling and telling jokes and—Jesus – I was flirting. Didn’t know I could still do that.”

He could hear their laughter in response through the speaker as he stepped into the plane. Everyone else was seated, most people already trying to close their eyes and find some rest before the plane landed in Atlanta.

“Tell me you got her number,” Steve begged and Bucky clenched his jaw, slumping down into his seat. The silence was enough of an answer. “Bucky!”

“I know, I know! But I gave her mine, at least,” Bucky replied weakly. “Just have to hope she’ll call.”

“She will,” Peggy said and the soft rustle of the sheets came like static through the phone. She yawned. “Y/n will call, Bucky. I’m sure of it.”

It was a problem for another day, he supposed. 

A flight attendant stood over Bucky’s shoulder, eyeing his phone and he muttered a quick apology.

“I gotta go. Plane’s taking off,” Bucky mumbled into the phone, nervously glancing back up at the attendant who was still watching him as he continued walking through the cabin.

“Call us tomorrow when you get settled,” Peggy requested. “I know Sunday won’t be easy but we’re here for you. Just need to keep busy on Saturday. Think you can do that?”

Bucky nodded, letting out a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m sure I’ll find something to keep me occupied.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, pal,” Steve said, the click of the bedside lamp turning off. “Anyone who willingly goes along with your ridiculous layover shenanigans has got to really like you. I’m not sure I would even do a cartwheel on that dirty floor for you, buddy.”

Bucky laughed, his cheeks muscles sore and whether it was from the lack of sleep or from smiling more in one night than he had in years, he wasn’t sure.

“You off the ledge now?” Steve asked.

“Yeah. Consider me back on solid ground,” Bucky replied. The flight attendant was making his way back down the aisle to scold him again and Bucky quickly said, “okay I really have to go now before I’m the reason this plane never makes it to Atlanta. Get some rest, guys. Thanks.”

“Always, pal.”

“Fly safe,” Peggy added.

With that, Bucky ended the call and turned off his phone, holding it up for the attendant to see. He narrowed his eyes on Bucky, almost in warning, before he retreated back to his seat for takeoff.

Bucky settled into his seat, folding his arms and letting his eyes drift closed. Despite the lumps in the back of the cushioning and the arm rest to his right completely taken over by the man next to him, Bucky felt a sense of calm, a wave of relief, for the first time in a long while.

His mind drifted back to the beautiful stranger in the airport. The woman with the coffee on her shoes and the laugh of an angel and the kindest eyes he’d ever seen.

He found you again in his dreams.

[chachkayes]

The Perfect Christmas

IT’S DONE! With 5 minutes to spare on Christmas day, the Merhayes fic is finally done. I won’t ramble too much, but this is super fluffy and domestic, and I think I’m happy with the result, despite my lack of a festive mood today. I hope you all enjoy!

“Momma! Hayes! It’s time to wake up!” Ellis Shepherd yelled as she knocked furiously on the door to her mother’s bedroom. A few seconds later, her brother and sister came scampering up behind her and started pounding on the door along with her. It was 6:30am on Christmas day. Meredith had woken herself and her boyfriend up approximately 15 minutes before she expected her young children to come barging into the room, demanding that they open presents.  “Right on time.” Meredith said with a laugh as she got up to open the door. This had become routine for her since Zola was old enough to understand that Christmas morning meant she was about to get spoiled rotten. Then, of course, Bailey joined her, and now Ellis was finally getting to the age where she understood the magic around Christmas.

Cormac Hayes hadn’t had to deal with children pestering him to open presents since his boys were much younger. He had been able to set boundaries and rules with them. Christmas hadn’t really felt the same since Abigail had passed away anyways, so their festivities hadn’t been incredibly spectacular in the past few years. That all changed when he fell in love with Meredith Grey. They’d been together for almost 4 years, but this was their first Christmas living together with their family under one roof. Previous Christmases were usually spent apart in the morning, then going over to one of their houses for dinner and gift exchanges in the evening.

Meredith opened the door to her room and the children bolted in, immediately jumping on the bed. She returned to her side of the bed and laid back down, just as Ellis flung herself onto her mom. Meredith laughed and hugged her youngest daughter. “Can we open presents now?!” Bailey said as he laid down dramatically at the end of the bed. “Austin and Liam aren’t up yet. We have to wait for them first.” Hayes reminded Bailey with a smile. “We also have to wait until after breakfast.” Meredith added on. Ellis had fully sprawled herself out over her mother’s body and was hugging her, and Meredith gladly kept her arms wrapped around her and snuggled with her baby girl. Zola sat herself up at the top of the bed, which was her usual spot. “What time are we making breakfast?” Bailey questioned. The two adults looked at each other and laughed as Bailey kept asking more and more questions. “Soon, buddy. Why don’t you and your sisters go play in your rooms for a little bit, while we get dressed, and then we’ll call you guys down to help us make breakfast when we start.” Meredith’s kids loved helping her and Hayes in the kitchen, so she knew that by offering to let them help, they’d listen and give her enough time to properly wake up.

As she suspected, the kids sat up eagerly, and after a chorus of eager okays from the three small children, they jumped off the bed and darted to their rooms. Meredith stretched and moved over into her boyfriend’s embrace. “I know I told them we’d get up, but I really do not want to move.” She said as Hayes wrapped his arm around her waist, and she nuzzled her head into his neck. “Well, it won’t hurt to stay here for a few more minutes.” He told her, kissing her forehead. So, for a few more minutes, they laid together in complete silence. They liked to take a few moments every morning and treat it as if it were their first time waking up next to each other. It’d only been something they’d started doing 7 months prior, when they first moved in together, but ever since then, neither of them could remember a period of time where they weren’t waking up beside each other, cuddling and kissing. “Merry Christmas, I love you.” Meredith whispered before closing the gap between their lips. “I love you too. Merry Christmas.” He whispered back as they pulled away. “I guess we should probably get up and get dressed now, shouldn’t we?” Meredith said, rolling over in their bed. Hayes caught her waist and rolled her back over, kissing her again on the lips and on her neck. “Okay, now we can get up.” He said with a laugh as he pulled away from Meredith and pushed himself out of bed. Meredith tried to glare at him with no avail, since she immediately broke out into a bright smile the moment he turned around and caught her gaze.

Finally, they’d both gotten up, and the younger children had met them eagerly downstairs. Breakfast that morning had consisted of Belgian waffles, bacon, sausages, strawberries and blueberries, as well as orange juice. All of which was made by either Hayes, Zola, or Liam, who’d be woken up by the sound of Bailey and Ellis scream giggling as they poked Meredith and ran away. After breakfast had been made, all the kids eagerly made their way into the living room and crowded around the Christmas tree, which had been stuffed with presents. Each kid had gotten 2 big gifts, and several other smaller gifts; Liam had received a brand-new Apple watch as a joint gift from his dad and Meredith, and a new gaming PC that was just from his dad. Austin had received a new skateboard, and the new gaming console he’d been hinting at Hayes to buy all throughout November and December. Zola received a new iPod, and a swinging rope hammock chair that she could hang in her room. Bailey got a new remote-controlled car that both Meredith and Hayes knew would find its way into every room in the house at some point in the next 2 days, along with a Nintendo switch that he could play Mario Kart on. Ellis had gotten new rose gold Beats headphones, along with a new guitar that came with promises for lessons.

After almost 40 minutes of going around and letting each kid individually unwrap all their presents, there were only 2 gifts left under the tree. Meredith and Hayes’ gifts for each other. Meredith passed the box over to her boyfriend and smiled as she watched him unwrap it. It was a new watch that he’d been eyeing for a few months, that had been engraved with “C, M, L, A, Z, B, E – to new beginnings,.” with a small heart on the bottom.

“There’s also a little A on the hand dial for Abby.” She pointed out. Hayes quickly wiped the tears forming in his eye as he looked over the engravings. “Oh, I love it so much. I love you, thank you.” He put it on his wrist, and then kissed his girlfriend in front of all of the kids, prompting ‘ew’s’ from everyone, which they laughed at and then kissed again. Hayes leaned over and grabbed the small box under the tree that was for Meredith and took a deep breath as she unwrapped it. She opened the lid of the box and her jaw dropped. She silently looked over at Hayes and then back at the box, eyes wide. Two tickets to Zurich, Switzerland. 

“Oh my god.” Meredith said once she finally processed what she was looking at. “What is it mommy?” Zola asked. “Tickets to Switzerland.” She responded breathlessly. “Like it?” Hayes asked, with a slight laugh and his signature smirk. “Like it?! I don’t know if anything could have been more perfect. I love it.” She said, hugging him. “We leave in two weeks, and we’re there for 2 weeks afterwards. I figured while we’re there, we could take a couple of days to go to Paris, and then take a flight to Ireland. I want to introduce you to my family. They’ve been begging me for the past 2 years to take you.” He explained. Meredith was rendered speechless. “I can’t believe this.” 

“Believe it. And don’t tell Yang, it’s a bit of a surprise. Also, even though it’s totally cheesy, we’ll likely be in Paris on our anniversary.” Meredith kissed him again. “You really know how to one up me on gifts, don’t you?” She asked sarcastically. “Mm, I have to be better than you at something.” He fired back through a laugh. “Thank you. I can’t wait, for everything.” Meredith meant what she said – she really didn’t know if she could wait another 2 weeks to travel and see her best friend, meet her boyfriend’s family, and spend their 4th anniversary in Paris (which, she agreed, was totally cheesy – but she didn’t care). She was also incredibly excited to get some alone time with Hayes. They’d definitely be making the most of that. “Merry Christmas” He said as he kissed her forehead and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “Merry Christmas, my love.” She said, resting her head on his shoulder.

The rest of the day was spent helping the kids set up all their new toys and technology, as well as get some things ready for dinner with Amelia, Link, a now 4 ½ year old Scout, and their 6-month-old daughter Charlotte, as well as Maggie, Winston, and their 5-week-old daughter Dianna. The whole day was filled with laughs and love, and they couldn’t have asked for anything more. This truly was the most perfect Christmas Meredith and Hayes could have dreamed of.

[cristinablackthornkingson]

Shadowhunters Short Story #69 Brothers are what best friends can never be.

Crossposted to my AO3, link in my bio.

It is a stormy March evening in Devon, 2013, when 15 year old Kit Herondale is pulled from his thoughts by the sound of footsteps entering the kitchen.

Kit lifts his head from where he was resting it against the wall his chair is against, and opens his eyes to see a tired but joyous looking Jem standing a few feet away from him, smiling ear to ear.

“Jem.” Kit scrambles to sit up, setting his mug down on the table beside him. “I-Is everything okay? Are Tessa and the baby okay?” He anxiously asks. Tessa went into labor about 6 hours ago, and Kit hasn’t heard much from she or Jem since. They came into the kitchen a couple of hours ago, with Magnus, so Tessa could get some herbal tea that she said is meant to help labor move faster and be less painful, but since then he hasn’t heard anything. 

“Yes everything is absolutely fine, would you like to come meet your sister?” Jem asks in a tone of joy, still beaming with delight. He is so utterly in love with his baby girl, it almost hurts. 

Kit nods eagerly, having been looking forward to this moment for almost nine months. 

Jem gestures for Kit to follow him. As they walk, Jem turns to Kit with a look of confusion on his face. 

“Oh yes I meant to ask you, who were you talking to earlier? Just after Tess, Magnus and I left the kitchen to go upstairs so Tessa could rest.” He asks, remembering hearing Kit’s voice, low and quiet in the kitchen, while Jem helped Tessa up the stairs. 

Kit blanches, remembering the conversation he had with Livvy’s ghost, just hours ago. He could tell Jem the truth, but then he’d probably worry and feel like he has to contact Emma to check that everything is okay, and that would distract him from Tessa and the baby.

“Oh um, no one important, I was on the phone with someone I went to school with, we’re not close or anything, just... called them because I was bored.” Kit shrugs, easily coming up with a lie, that seems to satisfy Jem. 

“Oh, well I’m glad to hear you have friends and are talking to them!” 

A few seconds later Jem leads him into the main bedroom, Jem and Tessa’s room. Jem lets Kit step ahead of him, while he closes the door.

The first thing Kit notices is how nice and warm and cozy the room is, thanks to the fireplace against the wall across from the bed, that’s been lit. The second thing he notices, is Tessa sitting propped up in bed with a mountain of pillows behind her, her hair is disheveled and thrown into a messy bun at the back of her head. She’s wearing a dusty pink hospital gown, that is open at the top, showing a tiny little body curled up against Tessa’s chest, wearing only a diaper and a hat, with a blanket covering her back. Peeking out from the little hat are wisps of curling dark hair. 

When she hears the door close, Tessa looks up and her face lights up when she sees Kit and Jem, a warm smile coming across her face. 

“Hi sweetheart.” Tessa quietly says in a hoarse voice. “I missed you, come meet your baby sister.” 

Carefully, Kit walks the few feet to the bed and lowers himself into a chair by Tessa’s side.

“Hold your arms out, one under the other like you’re making a cradle with your arms.” Tessa calmly says. It takes a few minutes of fumbling and help from Tessa, but soon Kit gets his arms in the right position. Tessa carefully lifts the baby out from inside her gown, wrapping the blanket around her expertly, before carefully laying her in Kit’s arms. 

The minute the baby is in his arms, Kit feels an unexplainable overwhelming rush of love, he already loved her before she was born, but looking at her now it’s like falling in love with her all over again. He chokes back tears as his eyes well up and his throat tightens. 

“Hi.” He quietly says in a tight voice. “Hi baby sister, I love you.” He briefly looks up from the baby’s face and asks “What’s her name?” 

Jem and Tessa share a smile, and Jem slips his hand into hers. 

“Wilhelmina Yiqiang Ke Carstairs, Mina for short.” Tessa softly says.

“What does Yiqaing mean?” Kit curiously asks, unfamiliar with Mandarin. 

“It means ‘Remembrance’ we chose it for those we’ve lost but will always remember, Will, Lucie, Jamie, Rosemary.” Jem gently says, hoping that this won’t upset Kit in anyway.

“I....” Kit trails off, unsure of how to feel about his baby sister in part being named for his mother, who he has absolutely no memories of. When he thinks about it though, he realizes it’s a beautiful gesture and a perfect way to make sure his mom is never forgotten. “I think she would have liked that.” He finishes, earning warm smiles from Jem and Tessa. 

“We think so too, love, we think so too.”

Kit looks back down at his baby sister, Mina, who has now blinked her eyes open to reveal big dark brown eyes just like Jem. She and Kit stare at eachother in fascination for a few seconds, before Mina wriggles her little arm free from her blankets and reaches up to grab onto Kit’s thumb, making him laugh and have to wipe at tears of joy. 

“It’s like she’s holding my hand.” He laughs, liking the idea of Mina feeling safe with him and wanting to hold his hand. He’ll be a great big brother to her, and always protect her and keep her safe. 

“Of course she is, she’s a very clever young lady and knows already just what a fantastic big brother she has.” Tessa says in a warm tone, making Kit’s heart flutter with delight. 

Kit holds Mina for a few more minutes, just looking at her in awe, taking in everything about her. Everything is totally calm and peaceful in the room, until Mina starts to fuss which in seconds turns into full on wails, breaking Kit’s heart right in two and making him panic. 

“Oh no! Oh I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to make her cry, I’m sorry!” Kit says in an alarmed and panicked tone, desperately trying to sush Mina and calm her with light bouncing. 

“It's alright love.” Tessa calmly says, placing a calming hand on Kit’s arm. “You didn’t do anything wrong she’s just hungry, here let me take her.” Tessa reaches over and carefully lifts Mina into her own arms. She single handedly and quickly adjusts her gown before guiding Mina to her chest, helping her to latch on.

As Tessa nurses Mina, Kit flushes and awkwardly tries to find somewhere to look. He has nothing against breastfeeding of course, he doesn’t care if someone does it in front of him, but it’s a bit different when it’s Tessa, the woman who took him in and promised to love and raise him for the rest of his life, the only mother he has. 

Jem immediately notices how embarrassed and awkward Kit feels and decides to intervene. 

“Kit.” He says. “Do you want to join me downstairs for dinner? Magnus left enough food for us for the next week or so.” Kit immediately nods. 

“Yes please!”

“Alright let's go, see you later my loves.” Jem softly says, stroking Mina’s hair and giving Tessa a quick peck on the lips. 

“See you later.” Tessa replies, watching fondly as Jem and Kit leave the room, Jem telling Kit awful dad jokes and making him laugh, which makes Tessa’s heart lift. Once the boys are gone, she looks back down at Mina and smiles softly “We’re very lucky to have them Mina, aren’t we?” 

The next day, at around 10:00 A.M. there is a light knock at Tessa and Jem’s bedroom door. 

“Come in!” Jem calls, keeping a careful eye on Church, who has cautiously approached Mina, lying in Tessa’s arms, and is clearly trying to decide what he thinks of the new baby.

The door opens and Kit steps in, looking sheepish. 

“Hello love.” Tessa beams, delighted to see Kit. 

“Everything okay son?” Jem asks in a worried tone, afraid that maybe something is wrong with Kit. 

“Oh yeah everything’s fine I just....” Kit clears his throat. “I um... I was just wondering if you need any help with Mina or anything, I’m not doing anything so... I thought I’d come see if you need some help.” He nervously tells them, afraid that they’ll say no and send him off to be on his own all day while they bond with Mina. He really wants to spend some time with Jem, Tessa and Mina but will they want to spend time with him?

“That would be lovely Kit, thank you.” Jem warmly says. Kit’s shoulders sag in relief and he starts to relax again.

“You can come over here and hold Mina for a while if you like, I’m going to have my first postpartum shower which can take anywhere from 10 minutes to about an hour.” Tessa lightly says, remembering her first postpartum baths after James and Lucie were born. She had been terrified of getting out of bed at all after James was born, nevermind bathing, but Jem was waiting right outside if she needed any medical assistance and Will was with her, while Charlotte and Henry watched Jamie.

Kit laughs as he takes a seat on the bed next to Tessa, and she lowers Mina into his arms when he is settled back against the pillows. 

“Did it hurt?” Kit curiously asks, looking up at Tessa. 

“Giving birth?” She asks. Kit nods. “It did, like hell, all 3 times, but it’s more than worth it, just like what we went through to find you and going through the adoption process is worth it, to have my babies.” Tessa fondly says, brushing Kit’s hair out of his eyes.

Shortly after he moved to Devon with Tessa and Jem, they approached him about legally adopting him, assuring him he can keep his surname and doesn’t have to take the name Carstairs if he doesn’t want to, but they would very much like to legally and officially adopt him. Kit thought about it for a while before agreeing, the process is long and stressful and still not fully complete, but it’s more than worth it to Tessa and Jem, to have their Kit. 

Kit smiles and blushes and Tessa kisses his cheek before ducking to kiss Mina on the cheek too. “I love you.” 

Tessa then stands up, grabs her towel, bathrobe and toiletries bag and heads into the ensuite bathroom for her shower. 

“I was looking through social media yesterday, after you set me up on Facebook so I can stay in touch with Emma easier. I saw this group on there for new fathers, and decided to join, thinking it would be full of advice and tips on how to care for baby and handle your anxieties and take care of your partner if you have one, stuff like that. Instead I found the most awful people complaining about their wives and babies, mostly talking about how seeing their wife give birth and seeing her postpartum has totally turned them off and they feel cheated, one phrase I saw over and over again was ‘It’s like watching your favorite pub burn down’.

I just cannot believe how disrespectful and horrendous these men are, their wives have just gone through 9 months of pregnancy followed by labroing and giving birth, and all they can do is whine and complain that 2 weeks postpartum she hasn’t lost the weight she gained and is still wearing pajamas or comfy clothes most days.

I don’t understand it, I delivered James, I delivered Lucie and I delivered Mina, I was Tessa’s primary caregiver when she was pregnant with James and when she was pregnant with Lucie, I’ve been by her side every second of this pregnancy and I’ve seen her postpartum 3 times now, and to me she always seems even more glorious and beautiful after having a baby, because she’s just gone through so, so much to bring a whole new life into this world, she’s just grown an entire other person, she’s like a goddess. 

I don’t understand it, how can anyone say those things about their wives? I couldn’t love Tessa more, whether she’s pregnant or not, whether she’s just had a baby or not. I just... I don’t understand it.” 

Kit is totally unsure of what to say after Jem finishes talking. He totally agrees with him, that the way some men talk about their wives after she’s given birth is absolutely disgusting, but he doesn’t know what to say to Jem. 

“I... uh... I agree?” He tries, not wanting to just ignore Jem. Jem turns to him and smiles softly, before reaching over and ruffling his hair affectionately. 

“Sorry Kit, I didn’t mean to rant to you, it’s just when I was young, when someone had just given birth, they took weeks, even months, to bond with the baby and heal from the birth, there were no expectations to ‘bounce back’ or anything, I’m just still trying to adjust to modern life and modern people. But at least I have you eh? You keep me up to date.”  

“I try, it’s my life mission to get you to stop saying ‘Order it offline’.” Kit grins. Jem chuckles. 

“You’re a good boy my Kit, I’m so glad you’re here with us.”

About 20 minutes later Tessa comes out of the bathroom in a clean pair of pyjamas, her yellow bathrobe thrown on over her pink pajamas, and her wait hair tied into a bun at the back of her head. 

“You made it!” Kit cheers, grinning at Tessa as she sits next to him on the bed. She grins and kisses his cheek. 

“That I did, and now it’s miss Mina’s turn to get changed, your Uncle Magnus gave us the most adorable clothes for you Mina, and I can’t wait to see you in them.” Tessa coos, taking Mina as Kit carefully passes her to her, before laying her down on the bed, just in front of her.

From the basket on the floor beside her, Tessa takes out a plain pink baby-gro/onsie, that has a hood, and pockets at the front. 

“That’s pretty tame for Magnus’ standards.” Kit notes. 

“I know, I think Alec picked this one out and it’s just so adorable!” Tesa exclaims, beginning to unbutton the yellow onsie with pink flowers that Mina is currently wearing. 

Kit watches in fascination as Tessa carefully and expertly slips Mina’s tiny arms out of her onsie and does the same with her legs. He can’t help but be fascinated by how small and tiny and delicate Mina is. She’s the smallest person he’s ever met, and so fragile too, he would be terrified if he were in Tessa’s position.

“Aren’t you afraid you’ll accidentally hurt her or break her, because she’s so small and delicate?” Kit asks Tessa, who laughs lightly as she starts to put the new onsie on Mina.

“I was when I had Jamie, Will and I both, but after having James and then Lucie and then helping out with my grandchildren and many, many other little ones, I’ve become an expert in handling delicate little babies.” Tessa explains. She then lifts a freshly dressed Mina up (once again shocking Kit with her confidence) and holds her so they’re face to face. Tessa’s smile grows and she leans in to kiss Mina’s cheek. “There we go, pretty baby! The sweetest, cutest baby in the world, huh?” 

“You should take a family photo with the kids Tess, the same way you took a photo of you and Jamie after he was born, and then you Jamie and Lucie after Lucie was born.” Jem suggests, knowing how much having pictures to remember these moments by, means a lot to Tessa.

“Oh yes that sounds like a lovely idea! Is it okay with you, Kit?” Tessa asks, laying a hand on his arm. Kit finds it kind of hard to believe that Tessa wants to take a picture with him, he still finds it hard to believe that she loves him as if he’s her own, and Jem does too, but he’s not about to say no.

“Sure, sounds like a good idea.” Kit agrees.

A few minutes later, after a bit of fussing from Mina, Jem snaps a series of pictures of Tessa, Kit and Mina. In the picture Tessa is sitting up in bed with Mina cradled in one arm, and the other around Kit, who is leaning into her and smiling shyly. It’s definitely one of Jem’s favorite pictures.

“It’s perfect.” Tessa says when Jem shows her the photo. “We’ll get it framed and hung up beside the pictures of me and Lucie and Jamie, as soon as we can.” 

“Sounds perfect.” Jem agrees. “I better go make a start on breakfast, I’ll bring you up a tray of course, love. Kit would you like to stay in here and have breakfast with us?” Jem asks. Kit nods, there’s nothing he’d love more, actually. 

“Yes please.” He says, settling back against the pillows, beside Tessa and Mina, feeling truly safe, and loved and happy for one of the first times in his life.

*1 YEAR LATER* 

It is a hot and humid day in March of 2014, when Jem, Tessa, Kit and Mina step out of the portal and onto the streets of Shanghai, just outside the Ke House, where they will be staying for the duration of their first family vacation. 

They’ve been planning this trip since Mina was 6 months old, and agreed that the best time to come would be just after Mina’s first birthday, she would be able to handle the heat and humidity better now as a one year old, than she would have done as a much smaller baby, and Kit is truly settled and content with them now and feels comfortable enough to go on vacation. 

“Is this where you lived before you moved to London, dad?” Kit curiously asks, having taken to calling Jem and Tessa mom and dad over the last few months, which they both love. 

“For a year or so, I was born here, lived here till I was about 1 and then my parents were put in charge of running the Institute which is where I lived until I went to London.” Jem informs him. 

“Cool.” Kit says, looking up at the building in front of him, in awe. 

“Come on, let's go find our rooms and get settled in, then I’ll introduce you to everyone.” Jem says, as Tessa sets a wriggling Mina down. 

“Mina.” Kit says with a sly grin. “Wanna race?” Mina has been walking since she was 9 months old, and now loves to run everywhere, especially when she gets to race Kit who of course always lets her win. 

“Uh-hu!” Mina nods enthusiastically. 

“Okay come on let's go, or I’m gonna get the biggest room!” Kit declares, taking off at a slow pace so that Mina can easily pass him by.

Jem chuckles and kisses Tessa’s cheek before going ahead of Kit to lead the way. 

As Jem shows Kit and Mina where they’ll be staying, Tessa goes ahead to her and Jem’s room, the same room they always stay in when they visit here. 

One of the first things she does is take one of her bags into the bathroom to unpack her toiletries. When she opens the bag, the first thing she sees is the pink box containing the pregnancy test she packed. 

For the last few weeks she’s been feeling sick and tired all the time, and has been having some issues with her powers, all the symptoms she had when pregnant with Mina. She had meant to take a test before they came to Shanghai, but she was so busy with Mina’s first birthday she totally forgot, until this morning when she was packing the last bits and pieces and found the pregnancy test she had bought a few weeks ago but never taken, so she decided to throw into the bag and take it here in Shanghai. 

Tessa nervously bites her lip and looks over her shoulder to make sure Jem or anyone isn’t nearby. When she’s satisfied she’s alone, she closes the door, opens the pregnancy test and takes the few minutes required, to take the pregnancy test. 

Three minutes later her phone beeps to let her know it’s time to look at the test, and so on shaky legs she pushes herself up from her seat on the edge of the bathtub, and walks over to the sink. She takes a deep breath before picking the test up and looking it. 

‘YES+’

Tessa can’t help but let out a stifled sob of delight, her hand flying up to cover her mouth. She and Jem weren’t trying, but they weren’t trying to prevent a pregnancy either, they decided to leave it up to nature, they agreed they would be thrilled if they had another baby now, but would also be okay with not having another one just yet. 

Tessa quickly finds Jem standing outside the room that’s going to be Kit’s, supervising he and Mina as they unpack (well more like Kit occasionally takes something out of his suitcase, then gets distracted by Mina and doesn’t unpack anything else for 20 minutes.) 

“How are you 3 getting on?” Tessa asks Jem, coming up to stand at his side. 

“Not too bad, though I think I might have to seperate the kids in order to get anything done, they distract eachother.” Jem laughs, his heart swelling with love as he watches Kit laughing while carrying Mina around on his back. He then turns to smile at Tessa and softly says “I can’t believe how amazing the last year has been, I couldn’t have asked for a better first year of fatherhood, I’ve loved every second.”

Tessa grins knowingly. 

“Well that’s good.” She says, holding up the positive pregnancy test for Jem to see. “Because in about 8 months, we get to do it all again.” 

[citrus-and-dreams]

Red Solstices and Equinoxes

@zaricats​! Hello, love! It’s your Secret Santa. I’m so so sorry this is late but I thought I had queued this up to be posted, but it turns out it had been sitting in my drafts the whole time!

Metallic. Sticky. Red.

Jasper hated its scent. Its texture. Its color.

Yet all he saw was red.

No matter how hard he scrubbed at his skin, tore at his sleeves, clawed at his scars-- it just wouldn’t wash out. 

To Peter and Charlotte, he must seem mad with the almost obsessive way he’d pause in front of the river to drench himself from head to toe. But they don’t understand. He could wash all he wanted, but the water stayed clear and his palms stayed red. 

Peter. Soft-hearted, pacifist Peter. A Peter that he had offered pity towards now looks at him with the same look of pity. It was Peter who first offered to find him a fresh set of clothes. Darker sleeves to trick his eyes into believing the stains on himself were less visible. Perhaps a pair of blue pants to replace the dusty brown ones that reminded him so much of dried blood. 

“There are tears on your old tunic,” Peter’s eyes flickered towards the crescent crisscrossing marks peeking from Jasper’s sleeves “...a new shirt could help cover…”

But the urge to rinse himself persists, new clothes or otherwise. He resists the impulse when the two are around-- if not for the off chance he can break the habit, then as a meek attempt to soothe the creases on Peter’s brows. He’d only been caught once, by Charlotte, who had come home early from a hunt. She didn’t spare him a word, only studying his miserable, water-logged form with the same look of apprehension she’d always given. 

Unlike her partner, Charlotte regarded him with weariness. Even without his attunement to emotions, he’d noticed her eyes betray a cautiousness that eludes Peter. Caution. Discomfort. Resentment. It’s subtle, as most things are with Charlotte, but it comes off of her in waves. Sometimes he wondered how much of that stems from her personal convictions and how much of it actually comes from his negativity pervading their space. 

So he opened his mouth. To say what, he wasn’t quite sure. Jasper wasn’t one for small talk, but it was an attempt. An experimental hand to build a bridge. He didn’t need her to be his friend, but at the very least he could be cordial. 

She’d disappeared back into the forest before he could ask about the weather.

***

On days where the invisible stains are particularly dark, he thought of her.

Of the ways she had looked at him with the reds of her eyes and decided that she wanted him painted in the same hues.

Of the ways she had stepped away from the canvases of red the newborns had created with their insatiable thirst.

Of the ways his senses were overwhelmed with red when she offered him the simplest of acknowledgements.

Attempting to love her was like attempting to love a solstice. Overwhelming. Everything about her was intense. Her winters came in the form of leadership. Unyielding. Calculative. Frosty. His senses felt nothing from her the first time she showed him how to dispose of newborns and they felt nothing still when she ordered him to dispose of her sisters. 

Her summers were fueled by anger. He felt it often when their numbers were few and she still stepped onto the battlefield. It was impossible, for him at least, to lose her in the heat of battle. The newborns may be senseless in their thirst and the crashing tsunamis of bloodlust overwhelms his gift, but her ruthlessness was a scorching beacon against the crowds.

 She always took more than she gave. She's fond of him, that-- at the very least-- he knows. Sometimes he dares to think of them as partners, but never equals.

Sometimes, he catches glimpses of a different season to her altogether. Not quite winter, not quite summer, but a solstice all the same. There are moments-- bursts of melancholy. Of anguish. Of loss. He catches her, when she believes she's alone, cradling herself with her intensity as she mourns for an equal. An equal that she gave just much as she took from. An equal that she freely gave affection to, not as a reward, but simply because she wanted to. An equal that she didn't feel the need to hide her pains and anguish from.

An equal that wasn't him. That would never be him.

Perhaps the red she had doused him in hadn't been intentional. Perhaps her red smears on him were merely a consequence of a bigger plan. Perhaps he hadn't even meant enough for her to even decide she wanted him in red.

He wonders if he could ever forgive her, but maybe Maria never needed nor cared if he doesn't.

***

Today's stains… weren't as invisible as they used to be. 

He's kneeling, palms pressed against the floor of an alleyway as red drips from his lips. More red pools at his side, creeping against his fingers as they flow from the still-warm body of-- he doesn't know. 

He had been doing so well. So well. He was adjusting quicker to the diet than she had seen in her visions. Those were her own words. He had heard her and felt pride then.

Now... Now, he couldn't remember.

She'd only left his side for a few minutes. All he had to do was stay put while she pickpocketed enough coins to afford two train tickets to the next state over. Their superhuman abilities carried them this far, but the soles of their shoes had reached their limits. 

He wasn't fond of the idea of splitting up, but being 6'3 definitely placed him at a disadvantage against her 4'10 in terms of stealth.

He wondered if she saw him feed. Preemptively that is. That maybe she was too far away to stop him. Or maybe this had been such a split second decision that her gift just wasn't fast enough to foresee. 

For a sickening moment, he wondered if she'd seen and simply left. 

Jasper knows he's a difficult person to be around, especially with how much his pessimism tended to seep out of him. Peter and Charlotte can attest first hand. It wouldn't surprise him if she, in her seemingly endless patience with him, just had enough when he suddenly relapsed. 

No, he wouldn't be surprised.

But it still stung all the same.

More so than it would Peter, who welcomed him out of pity. More so than it would Maria, who he had at least known where he had stood with her.

But Alice. That was the name she had given him. Alice. No last name. She couldn’t remember a last name to give.

Sweet Alice. Playful Alice. The Alice that pulled at his wrists as she charged through streets. The Alice that promised a future in a coven of golden eyes. The Alice that floods his gift with an emotion that he can’t quite place yet.

The Alice that, he's come to realize, made his chest feel lighter than it's been for decades.

 He didn't have the gall to call her his, but he's entertained the thought of existing next to her enough to believe he’d follow her anywhere.

If she’d have him. If she’d still want him.

A hand. Small, tentative, soothing. It lightly traces against his shoulder before resting against his arm. 

It's her.

He doesn't look at her. Doesn't chance looking towards her eyes. There's a shame that wells up inside of him. One that berates him for succumbing to red when hers have been black for days. She's thirsty. Far more than he was. He could feel her thirst almost as well as his own.

But there's something else that overpowers that. Concern. 

He feels her gently brush the stains on his cheek, wiping them the best she could with the inside of her sleeves. She’s so small. Oh so small against him, but somehow she manages to wrap him completely. A reassurance. An admonishment.

But not a rejection.

Slowly, she nudges him to his feet, carefully wrapping him in the same cardigan to cover the violent residue of his meal.

For a split second, he thinks of how silly he looks with his lanky build jutting from her clothes. His shoulders could easily split the ratty fabric into pieces, but surprisingly, it holds.

Before they leave the alleyway, he notices her pause in front of the corpse. There's a flash of something behind her eyes and he thinks she's about to take a drink herself when she bends down, but she leaves the body without further injury. She does, however, fish out a wallet and pocket a few bills before tucking it back to its owner.

***

They’ve booked a room at the furthest motel they could find. It’s seedy, with yellow edges and an owner with even yellower teeth. The room key was handed to them without any questions.

 They’d rinsed his bloodied clothes the best they could in the tub, and he watches as the brown seeps from the fabric out to the waters.  He hopes it doesn’t leave much of a stain. He’s had enough of those for a while.

She finds ratty bathrobes in the closet for him to wear while they wait for his clothes to dry. It’s coarse against his skin, and he doubts it feels comfortable against her legs, but she lets him rest against her thighs anyways.

 They had started out on opposite ends of the single bed, but somehow wound up with his head buried against her lap. She strokes slow circles against his scalp, washing over him with an emotion that’s so uniquely Alice. What she sees in him, he’s yet to understand. He thinks she offers him more than he could ever offer her. 

Her fingers trail across his face before he could pursue that train of thought further, smoothing over the frown that was starting to crease over his brows. She coaxes him to look at her. To meet her eyes.

She’s only ever seen him in blacks and gold. He wonders if she’ll hate this color on him just as much as he does.

Her response came in the form of two soft brushes against his eyelids that worked down to his lips. They don't have to talk about what had happened right that moment, but somehow, he thinks they're going to be okay.

***

If Maria is a solstice, then Alice is an equinox. 

It’s comfortable. It’s mild. It’s balanced.

His time with Alice, despite spanning two decades now, was still only a blip in comparison to the seven he had spent under Maria. She never took more than she gave, though he thinks she could be far more greedy and he’d feel all the same. Whatever she wants-- whatever he has, she can have. Maybe it’s how healthy she makes him feel that he doesn’t find the need to be so calculative.

Equinoxes always feel shorter than solstices because of their mild temperatures and evenly split days whereas solstices seem to drag on with how long their days/nights are. He's been trying to love Maria far longer than he has loved Alice, but he believes that’s going to change in several decades. He hopes so. He knows so.

She's sitting in front of her vanity in their shared bedroom. There’s a philosophical book resting against his thigh, but it's long been abandoned. He watches her back, studying the way her hair bounces with each movement.

She hmms at her reflection and turns to look at him. A look of pride as she waits for him to notice her handiwork. 

She's used the lipstick Rosalie's gifted her. It’s a stark pop of red against her pale skin.

He sets his book aside and walks up to her. To rest his chin against her shoulder as she wraps her arms around his. She presses a kiss onto his chin, directly where one of his old scars laid, leaving a splotch of color against his head.

He finds that… maybe he doesn't dislike red so much after all.

Word count: 2008

[kaimelia]

I would love a second part❤️

A/N: A second part was highly requested, so here it is! I’ll post a final part in a few days, where Charlotte and maybe some others come up to Seattle to visit Amelia and Link. I hope you enjoy it!

---------------------

She found herself standing outside the doors of the practice once again, trying to find the motivation to walk inside and see the people in the building. Over the past hour, Amelia had poured her heart out to Charlotte about her struggles during pregnancy; both those concerning her grief and the drama over the paternity of her son. She’d told her friend about all the small moments between her boyfriend and their son when she just knew that Link was the one and that it truly was different this time. Eventually, Charlotte had convinced her to come back to the practice and tell all of their other friends about her son. Amelia had no doubts that her friends would be more than happy for her, but she was still terrified to do it. She knew that it was for the good and it would only expand the circle of people that cared about her son and would do anything to make sure he was okay. Still, as she walked into the elevator with Charlotte at her side, she took some breathes and prepared herself. The walk down the hallway towards Addison’s office felt treacherous but before she knew it, she was knocking on the door and felt Charlotte’s hand on her shoulder. The door opened.

“Amelia! Hey, come in!” The brunette walked into the room, seeing Violet sitting on the armchair, eating a salad. Addison sat back down and patted the space next to her for Amelia to sit down. “How was lunch?”

“Oh, it was good. We mostly just talked the whole time.” Amelia looked down at her hands and paused. She knew that her friends could tell she was nervous about something, especially Violet who set down her container onto the table and leaned forward.

“Is everything okay, Amelia?” The brunette cursed her friend who was using her ‘therapist voice’, something she had always despised. She looked up at her friends.

“I have something to tell you. Uh, I had a baby.” Addison cocked her head to the side, waiting for Amelia to continue. “Almost two months ago. His name is Scout,” she pulled up her favorite picture of him, from one of their first days at home when they spent most of their time laying in bed and staring at the amazing human they had created. In the picture, Scout was curled up on top of her, his blue eyes wide and his blonde hair almost golden with the sunlight coming in from the window. “And, he’s probably the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I didn’t tell you because I was nervous and I knew that it would be really difficult and I was dealing with enough of my own grief during my pregnancy so I just kind of put off telling you until now. That’s also why I came down to visit Christopher’s grave this year.” Addison pulled Amelia into a hug, embracing her tightly.

“Oh, I’m so happy for you.” She pulled away to look at her younger sister, her smile wide. “He’s so adorable, Amelia.” Violet came over and hugged Amelia quickly, part of her relieved that the young girl they had known was so grown up and mature.

“I’m not sure when, yet, but I’d love for you guys to come up and meet him sometime. And my boyfriend, Link.” They raised their eyebrows before Violet spoke up.

“Um, pictures please.” The neurosurgeon laughed softly, opening her phone again and showing them various photos of her boyfriend.

“He’s hot,” Addison exclaimed, looking through photos, “and he’s a good guy?” Amelia nodded.

“He’s amazing. He’s the one.”

“And when’s the wedding?” Violet asked, clearly already invested in the new information.

“Not yet. We’re waiting until Scout’s a little older and our lives calm down a bit.” Her phone buzzed with a text from Link. She smiled as she opened the picture of her son with wide eyes, clutching his stuffed dinosaur. Her attention turned back to her friends. “I’m going to go find Sheldon, but I’ll see you later?” They waved goodbye as Amelia left the room with a grin on her face. She found him sitting in his office and she knocked on the empty doorframe.

“Hey! I was waiting for you to come find me.” Amelia quickly sat down in the chair across from him and smiled.

“I had to make my rounds. It’s a lot.” She laughed nervously. “So, I wanted to tell you something. It’s why I came.”

“I thought you came for Christopher’s birthday?” Amelia shook her head.

“Well, partly. But I also had a son and I figured I should come and visit Christopher this year.”

“You had a baby? When?”

“About a month and a half ago, so he’s still little and also kind of freaking out because his mom just up and left. Here,” she handed the phone over and watched as Sheldon smiled at the various photos of her son.

“What’s his name?”

“Scout, Scout Lincoln.” Sheldon scoffed.

“You know, I’m a little offended that ‘Sheldon’ wasn’t chosen, but I’ll get passed it.” She laughed. “And how are you doing? I mean, it’s a lot to handle.”

“I’m good. I’m still learning how to deal with things like my grief but it’s getting easier. And I’m really happy.” Amelia took her phone back and looked up at him. “And you? How are you doing?”

“I’m okay. It’s been a few years since Miranda passed and I really do miss her, but I’m glad to be working again. I missed you, you should come and visit more.”

“I will, especially when Scout gets older. You should come up to Seattle, too. You’ve yet to come and visit me.” She smiled before standing up. “I have to go, I have to tell Nai and Sam and Cooper. And Jake. Although I’m sure they’ve already heard. But for the record,” she said while moving towards the door, “I missed you too, Sheldon.”

---------------------

Amelia grabbed her bag, hopping out of the car and shutting the door behind her. Addison rounded the car and quickly pulled her sister into a hug. “I’m gonna miss you, Amelia. You promise to stay in touch?”

“Of course. And when I get home, I’ll call you and we can figure out when you’re coming up to visit me. It’s about time, anyways.” She checked her watch before pouting. “I have to go, my flight leaves soon.” The redhead grinned before quickly hugging her friend again.

“Bye, Amelia. I love you.”

“I love you too Addie.” Amelia walked away, waving goodbye as she headed into the airport, content with the reconnections she had made with old friends. Her phone buzzed with another picture, a selfie of her boyfriend and their son. She paused for a moment to smile before rushing towards security, eager to get back home to her family.

[op-law]

Charlotte Kato x Reader {I Need You} Ch 1

(Y/n)'s Pov

"(Y/n) we're leaving now! Hurry up or else you'll have to crave a watermelon this year!" As my sister threw my bedroom door open, I practically tossed my laptop across the room but I somehow managed to stop myself before that could happen. Though as I tried to get my heavy breathing under control, I replied to the girl that had barged into my safe space. "G-Geez Yuki, don't you know how to knock? Just let me find my socks then I'll be right downstairs"

"Hehehe. Alright but don't take too long~" Once she had left the room, I quickly found a dirty pair of socks before I did the smell test and slipped them onto my feet. "I hope the corn maze is ready now it's the best part of visiting the pumpkin patch" After I found my favorite Halloween sweater from my closet, I left the room and started down the steps.

"Perfect now that the whole family's here we can head out! Oh, and good news sweetheart I called ahead and they said the corn maze is open for business as of today" Hm, that was good news indeed. "That's great Frank but don't call me sweetheart again you're not my Dad so stop pretending that you are" I didn't intend to sound so hostile towards the man but I was sick and tired of him trying to replace my Dad.

"Sorry (Y/n) didn't mean to upset you... Let's all head out now it's a bit of a drive to get there though that's alright since it will all be worth it to see you kids happy" After the six of us had piled into the old caravan I refused to speak to anyone as I popped my earbuds in and started up my One Piece playlist.

'As a kid, I never stopped searching for a great treasure'

~~~~~~~~~~

45 Minutes Later...

I was lost in my music though when someone pulled out my earbud I was brought back into reality. "(Y/n) we're here. Come on I can even see a candy apple stand and I know how much you love those" Since it was only Yuki I gave her a pass as I unbuckled my seatbelt and followed her out of the van. "You're crying again (Y/n)"

Thankfully the others had already left so I quickly wiped my tears on the back of the sleeve of my sweater before I looped my arms with Yuki's. "Where should we go first, Yu? I hope you brought cash since I don't have a penny to my name" When my little sister brought us over to the candy apple booth, she brought us each one. "Dad gave me some cash so I'll take care of buying our stuff for the day"

As the word 'Dad' rolled off of my sister's tongue I felt a sharp pain shoot through my heart but I tried to ignore it. Sure, Yuki didn't have the same relationship with our Dad that I had though it still upset me to hear her call someone else Dad. She was only three when he died and I was seven but I was the one who watched him take his last breath. Even though ten years had passed since that day I still thought about him every day.

"Oh, look (Y/n) there's the corn maze! How about we have a little bet? The first one to find their way out gets to boss the other person around for the rest of the day. Which path are you going to take Sis?" As I looked over the map, I finally decided I would take the second path on the right. "I'll see you on the other side Yuki and if I'm not out by the time you finish just head to the pumpkin patch since I wanted to go there next anyways"

"Okay! See ya (Y/n)!" Once the girl had disappeared into one of the other paths, I started down my own though I was a little surprised to see how tall the corn was since it was still early in the season but I wasn't about to complain about it. "Now to find the exit~ Hehehe. I love October so much~" There was just something about this month that sent shivers up my spine but I just loved the feeling it brought to me.

"Boy and girls of every age wouldn't you like to see something strange?~" While I was making my way through the maze I had come across multiple dead ends and so far I still couldn't find the exit. It was a little strange since usually, I would have found my way out by now though maybe I just picked a bad path.

'(Y/n)~'

"Hm, Yuki is that you?... Yuki?" When I didn't get a response, I figured that I must have been hearing things or maybe the girl was celebrating her victory over me. "I need to find the exit so I can go hunt down my pumpkin" I took the next right in the path but something blocking the path had caused me to trip. "What the hell was that?... Hm, who in the hell would put a pumpkin in the middle of a pathway like this?"

As I picked up the medium-sized pumpkin in my hands, I gave it a once over though something about it felt familiar to me. "Hehehe. You kind of remember me of the sweet adorable Kato from Whole Cake Island. I wonder if the staff will let me buy you... I'm going to ask since I'm sure they'll be fine with it" When I stood up from the ground I continued on my way and as fate would have it, I finally found the exit. "There you are (Y/n)! You took forever in ther- where did you find a pumpkin?"

"I tripped over it before I found the exit though I think I want to buy this one. It's super adorable just like Kato don't you think?" As Yuki started to reply I could already see the frown on her lips but I didn't care since this little guy was coming home with me. "The pumpkin freak? Ha. Ha. Ha. Don't tell me you actually have feelings for that character (Y/n) I mean I can understand some of your other 'crushes' but that guy is just weird"

"Don't you have a crush on Basil Hawkins? I'm pretty sure that guy has a cult and he enjoys torturing poor innocent people like my baby Trafalgar Law" Sure, Hawkins might have looked like a normal guy but he just seemed like the type that would bathe in the blood of his victims. "Yeah... we're not going to discuss that (Y/n). Though at least my man actually looks like a man unlike the weirdo Kato"

I knew this wasn't going to end well but I couldn't help when a reply spilled from my lips. "At least Kato doesn't have any face tattoos" Yuki's face started to turn this bright red color as the insult war went into full swing. "At least Hawkins wears pants" When the next insult poured from my lips Yuki's cheeks had started to turn pink. "At least Kato smiles"

"Hawkins can smile and when he does it sexy as hell... Oh shit, thank God no one was around to hear me say that... Let's go to the pumpkin patch so I can get myself a pumpkin" As I started to giggle about the girl's outburst, I held my pumpkin closer to my chest though when something wet slid across my thumb I almost dropped it. "What was that?"

When I turned the pumpkin around, I didn't see anything that could have caused the wetness on my hand but I chalked it up to just being a drop of water from a nearby tree or something like that. "Weird... Yuki wait for me!" The girl didn't stop running towards the pumpkin patch though I easily caught up to her before she could get very far. "Slow down Yu! I'm going to end up dropping my pumpkin at this rate!" Thankfully this time Yuki did as I asked. "I'm sorry Sis. What are you going to crave on your pumpkin this year? You always do something different each year and they always come out looking fantastic"

"I'm not sure yet"

"Oh, look at this pumpkin (Y/n) it's huge! Do you think it will fit in the van? I don't want to take up too much space but I also really want it" I took a good long look at the pumpkin she wanted though I didn't think it would be a problem since it would fit perfectly fine in the backseat between us. "We can put it in the empty space in the back seat. If you can find Frank ask him to carry it for you since I'd rather not speak to that man any more than I have to"

"Alright (Y/n) I'll go find him but please try and at least be nice to him for once. He really cares about us like we're his own kids" That might have been true but there was no way in hell that I was going to get along with Frank any time soon. "No, it's not going to happen Yuki and you know that. I need to clear my head for a minute just text me when we're ready to leave" Why couldn't Yuki just keep her thoughts to herself for once? I didn't mean to get as upset as I did at the girl but it was far too late to turn back now.

'That wasn't very nice (Y/n)'

"Hm, who said that?" I had definitely heard someone speak though when I looked around, I didn't see anyone. "Hello?" There was a moment of silence as the sound of birds chirping met my ears but when I got no response from a person, I only shrugged my shoulders and kept walking. "Must have been the wind"

The rest of my walk was quiet and uneventful but I still didn't feel like going back to the others just yet. "This looks like a good place to sit" Since there wasn't much out here to use as a seat, I ended up just sitting on the slightly wet grass while my back leaned against the tree behind me. "It's so peaceful out here... Too bad I can't stay here forever"

I knew there wasn't going to be much time to myself today but I was at least going to enjoy every second that I had right now. "Hm, I wonder what kind of design would look the best on you. Any thoughts small pumpkin?" As my fingertips started to trace along the ribs of the pumpkin's hard shell, I felt a pleasant feeling start to fill my chest. Though I wasn't exactly sure what had caused me to feel this way.

"My Dad helped me crave my first pumpkin when I was just two years old. We had to use those silly plastic craving tools since I was too little to use the regular kitchen knife. It became our tradition to carve a pumpkin every year together but... now he's dead and it's all my fault" I couldn't stop my tears from falling any longer and I just sat there as they hit against the shell on the orange object within my lap. "H-He never would have been driving that day if I hadn't dropped the pumpkin b-but I did a-and it cracked. H-H-He just wanted me to be happy. I killed him!"

'It wasn't your fault (Y/n)'

~~~~~~~~~

End Chapter 1

[universe-n-3276]

Carrying the Moon

Chapter 2

Sander hadn't slept in two days.

As he read his sister's letter over and over again, he took a decision, but he hadn’t the courage to say it out loud. He knew that, what he had to do, or rather, what he wanted to do with every inch of his body, would affect him in the long-term, but nothing and no one could convince him to do otherwise.

Besides, he had to tell Robbe, and he didn't know how he would take it. Sander hoped, his boyfriend would choose to stick with him anyway, because, at that moment, he really couldn't imagine, how to handle any more pain, although part of himself knew how risky his sudden decision was.

So, after his second sleepless night, he got up early to make breakfast, hoping that it wouldn’t be their last meal together, and with his heart pounding in his chest, once finished, he sat at the kitchen’s table, waiting for his boyfriend.

"Good morning!"

"Hey..."

They lived together for years, but Sander still hadn't gotten used to seeing Robbe when he just woke up. He was the cutest thing in the world, all sleepy and with his hair pointing in all directions. Robbe gave him a quick kiss on the lips, perhaps their last kiss, Sander thought, poured himself some coffee, and sat down, completely oblivious of the Sliding Doors moment he was going through.

"Did you sleep a little?"

Sander shrugged, staring at a little grain of sugar on the table. He just couldn't raise his eyes. He knew he had to speak up, but the lump in his throat was preventing him to do anything at all. He hated fighting with Robbe but felt that putting that conversation off, would only make things worse.

"I have to talk to you about something."

He began, and the other's facial expression immediately changed, becoming alarmed, almost scared. Robbe put the cup, he was holding in his hands, on the table, and frowned in anticipation.

“It may sound reckless to you perhaps, but I seriously thought about it, and I want to adopt Charlotte's baby."

Robbe stared at him in the most indecipherable way. He went silent for a few minutes, motionless, frozen in the same position he had before receiving that news. Sander took his hand and Robbe lowered his eyes to look at it.

"You want to adopt Charlotte's baby."

He said calmly, repeating the words that had come out of Sander's mouth just a few minutes earlier.

"And you took this decision, that will completely change your life, without consulting me, your boyfriend, with whom you always said, you wanted to spend the rest of your days."

Sander nodded slowly, feeling guilty. He had foreseen such a reaction, and he knew he couldn't force Robbe to share his choice. But he hoped for it, after all, because sooner or later, that was how they had planned things to go. Everything was just speeding up a little.

“I haven't taken this decision without consulting you. I read the letter and I just knew what I had to do."

Robbe pulled his hand back and clenched it in his fist, sighing in frustration. It was all going really bad, much worse than the most horrible scenario, Sander had thought during his sleepless nights.

“Charlotte will never let you. You have to study for your last year, you have your job. How do you plan to deal with all of this alone?"

"Alone."

The word slipped on his tongue, heavy and devastating like a boulder rolling down a mountain. He couldn't imagine something so evanescent would taste so bitter. Poisonous. He swallowed it, trying to stay calm, even if it was getting harder and harder. How much longer could he resist, if the first person, he was telling his decision, reacted that way.

"I don't want to raise a child at 23."

"And I can't leave him."

There were so many things he wanted to say at that moment. Things that Robbe probably would’ve understood, and made him change his mind eventually.

Even if he carries the moon...

Charlotte's words echoed in his mind like a jackhammer. To her, that sentence was probably just a romantic metaphor, but it got stuck to Sander like a clamp and didn’t want to let him go. He didn't want to let it go. Those words were the only thing that was pushing him to keep going.

But he couldn’t speak up, he couldn’t open up to the person in front of him, without influencing him in his choice.

Yes, Robbe would’ve understood, and maybe that was the point. Sander had to let his boyfriend's instincts take over because that was his real decision. Naked, raw, impulsive, painful, but real.

"You’d leave me for him, though."

Sander shook his head confidently, looking Robbe straight into his eyes for the first time during that morning. That was the only thing he had always been sure of in life.

Never. I would never leave you. Not in this, nor in any other universe.

He wanted to say it out loud, scream it at the top of his lungs, but once again, he swallowed his words and pursed his lips.

“I don't wanna be a father and you don't wanna let him go. The consequences are pretty obvious to me. "

Even if you’d break into a thousand pieces, he would be able to put you back together. 

Oh, you were right, my little Charlotte, but he won't be here anymore.

Sander closed his eyes, burying his face in his hands, unable to say or do anything. He felt devastated, going against himself to do what he felt was right. He wanted to stand up, hug Robbe and cry all of his tears because those weren't the things he wanted to decide at 23 years old.

He shouldn’t have chosen whether to stay with the love of his life or raise his sister's baby.

But he didn’t stand up, he did nothing, and Robbe for the first time didn’t try to comfort him. He didn’t come closer. He didn't stroke his shoulder, he didn't run his fingers through his hair, whispering that everything was going to be okay.

Maybe Sander would’ve just needed to look up and see his boyfriend's watery eyes to change his mind. To make him give up, and make him retrace his steps, but sometimes the universe is mean and decides that the path you are on isn’t hard enough for you, so at that moment full of possibilities, nothing happened. Neither of them tried to take a step towards the other, not imagining how little it would take to change the fate of not just two, but three people.

And when the silence between them became unbearable, Robbe took courage and spoke again for the last time.

"Have a good life, Sander, and congratulations."

[previous] - [next]

[tsc-updates]

Wessa Wedding Anniversary - One-Shot

March 3rd 1887

Tessa stood in front of their body length mirror. She looked herself over. Tessa put her hand on her back and pulled the nightgown tighter around her. She patted her stomach and smiled. Behind her, the door opened and closed and she dropped the nightgown to fall loosely around her again.

Will came into their bedroom, his eyes shut and his clothes a mess. His hair hadn’t seen a brush in days. He sat on the trunk by the foot of their bed with a sigh. “James is finally asleep.” He rested his hand against his forehead. “For now. I give him about two to three hours before he starts screaming again.”

Tessa came to stand in front of him. She put her hands on his shoulders and squeezed them while rubbing little circles. “It’s past midnight.” Will made an incoherent sound in acknowledgement. “Happy anniversary.”

He paused. His eyes flew open. “It’s not our anniversary.”

She nodded very slowly. “March 3rd. Check the calendar.”

He softly pushed her away and got up to check the little calendar Charlotte and Henry had gifted them for Christmas a couple years back. He inspected it and looked back at her, his face strict with guilt. “I am so so sorry, darling. I can’t believe I forgot.”

She came to him and cupped his cheeks. “It’s okay.” She giggled. “You’ve been swamped with taking over the Institute, with building relationships with both the Enclave and the Downworlders representatives, with James…”

“I swear that child has the lungs of a banshee. And he fusses over every little thing. He’s incredibly dramatic for a months-old baby.”

“At least we know for sure he’s yours.” She smirked.

Will dropped his gaze to hers and chuckled. His smile dropped into a half-frown again. “I didn’t get you anything.”

“That’s okay.” She let him go and turned her back on him, walking back towards their mirror. “I have something for both of us.”

“Oh?” She closed her eyes. She could feel his presence, the heat of his body behind her, close. She took a deep breath.

“I’m pregnant.”

Silence. She didn’t open her eyes.

“I know that this is probably the worst timing ever for another baby, but…” She didn’t finish. Will spun her around, and her eyes flew open with the shock. His blue eyes were shining, and the smile on his face was one of the widest she’d ever seen him have.

“You’re pregnant? With child pregnant?”

“What other types of pregnant do you know?” He laughed and pulled her into his arms for a hug.

He released her after a few seconds. “And we had already thought that James was a miracle!”

“I guess two for the price of one really is my thing.” She giggled. He raised his eyebrows. “Too soon?”

He chuckled and pulled her in for a kiss. After giving several rapid kisses, he joined their foreheads together. “I can’t believe we’re having another baby!”

“I already have name ideas.” She admitted.

He pulled away but not far. Tessa was still in the comfortable circle of his arms. “How about this? If I can guess the names that you’ve decided, since it’s our anniversary, we do that thing that I like.” He waved his eyebrows suggestively.

“Which one? The one we hardly do, or the one we never ever do?”

“I think we’ve established that the thing we never ever do is to never ever be done.” He made a face that set her off into a fit of giggles. “Do we have a deal?”

“Hang on. What if you don’t guess the names?”

He thought it over. “We do the thing that you like.”

“Why must we have sex at all?”

His eyes widened. “It’s our anniversary.”

“You didn’t even remember!” She crossed her arms.

“Pff technicality.” She sighed amusedly. “So, do we have a deal?” He put out a hand.

She looked down at it. “Deal.” She shook it. “So?”

He pulled away from her and inspected her face for a little while. Clasping his hands together, he grinned. “If the baby is a boy, Sydney. If the baby is a girl, Lucie.”

“Manette or Snow?”

“If you have to ask then I’m afraid you might not be the Tessa Gray I married.” He mocked. “Am I right?” Her nose twitched. “I am right!”

“I didn’t say anything!”

He waved his finger at her face. “You didn’t have to. Your nose did that thing that it always does whenever I’m right, and you don’t want to admit it.”

“My nose does a thing?” Her hands flew to her nose, covering it.

“Yes, it’s adorably cute.” He took her hips and pulled her close to him again. “I love them. Couldn’t come up with better names myself.”

“I can’t receive all the credit.” Her head tilted to the side, and her brown waves fell in a quick sweep. “Charles Dickens did help out a little.”

He shrugged. “We’ll honour him in the next one.”

“Next one?” Her eyes widened in shock. He leaned down and kissed her without answering.

“I love them. Truly.” He bumped her nose with his own.

She bit her lower lip. “You’re sure?”

“Yes. What else would I want to name the baby?”

“I just assumed that if we had a girl, you’d want to name her…”

He cut her off. “Ella.” He nodded slowly and disentangled them. “You assumed I’d want to name her Ella.” He sighed and sat on the edge of their bed. “I can’t. I can’t look into the face of my daughter and know that she bears the name of the sister that I killed.”

“Will.” She made her way to him quickly. “You didn’t…”

“I know.” He cut her off again. He was agitated. “I know. Well, I don’t know. But I know.” He shook his head. “I just can’t.”

She brushed his black curls away from his eyes and leaned down to leave a kiss on the top of his head. “Lucie and Sydney it is then.” She pulled away and took his hands, pulling him up so he could put his arms around her again.

“Lucie and Sydney it is.” He brushed a strand of her hair behind her ear, and she felt her insides melt. His small smile turned into a mischievous grin. “Since I got the names right, and since it is technically our anniversary…”

This time, she was the one cutting him off. “Just shut up and take your pants off.”

“Yes!” He whispered under his breath, causing her to laugh. He started peeling his clothes off and stopped mid-way through the buttons of his shirt. “I have an idea. Want to go do it in my office?”

Tessa held up her hands. “That one time was fun, almost getting caught by Bridget was not.”

“Bridget is asleep.” He shrugged.

“It’s Bridget.” She remarked.

“Good point.” He went back to undoing his buttons but quickly paused once more. “Oh, what if we…”

“Will, I love you, but I’d very much like to get this done before the baby starts screaming again.” She came close to him and undid his buttons, peeling it off his body. “You think you can keep your mouth shut for the duration of this?”

“I know I can. Can you? The previous history says it’s improbable.” He smirked. She pushed him, and they fell down on the mattress together in a fit of giggles and kisses.

Later that night, after Tessa was fast asleep, Will was returning from putting James to sleep after another fit of screams. He slipped into the covers carefully as to not wake her. He kissed her cheek, and she made an appreciative sound.

He leaned down and laid his head next to her stomach. “Hey, little birdie.” He kissed her hip, and she stirred a little but remained still otherwise. “It’s your father speaking. At least I hope so.” He chuckled. “I’m just joking. You’ll see that I do that a lot. And no matter what Sophie tells you, I am the funniest man you’ll ever meet, I promise.”

He stroked the side of her stomach with the tips of his fingers. “I am so happy that you exist. I can’t even express in words how much I already love you. And I am going to love you. So much. I am going to love you with such intensity that no one will ever be good enough for you.”

“James, your brother, is proving to be quite the mama’s boy. I can’t blame him. Your mother is the most amazing woman in this world. She’s the most amazing woman to ever exist, and that will ever exist. So if you end up falling for her side as well, I won’t hold it against you. Just remember this: I will give you candies for breakfast. I’m definitely a favourite parent material, just saying.”

“Anyway, it’s quite late, and I should probably go to sleep if I want to shower your mother with love and affection for the next twenty-four hours.” He kissed her stomach. “I can’t wait to meet you, my little birdie. I love you.”

He came back up on the bed and took Tessa into his arms. “Goodnight, love.” He whispered in her ear, as sleep took over him as well.

[with-love-anu]

Desiderata: The Reveal

PART: 5

WORD COUNT: 2K

PAIRING: Sirius Black x Reader

SUMMARY:  You had been best friends with James, Remus, Sirius and Peter. Read your journey of love, friendship and jealousy through your wonderful years at Hogwarts. Enjoy!

SERIES MASTERLIST

As you moved through the train looking for the compartment and your friends, you couldn’t help but feel a bit anxious. You had always worn simple T-Shirts and jeans at school. Now, as you walked wearing a coral pink off-shoulder top and some high-waist denims, you could suddenly feel people noticing you. It made you smile, the new found attention. You finally saw your besties sitting in the second last compartment.

“Fangs!”

James hugged you as you entered. He held you at arm’s length, his hands on the either side of your shoulders as he took a good look at you. “Wow! You look so pretty!”

“Well, I take it you like my new look.” You smiled smugly cocking an eyebrow.

“I don’t know about him, but I freaking love it” Remus piped in as he came forward and practically engulfed you.

“Remus…can’t…breathe…” you choked out as Remus chuckled releasing you.

You turned to find peter as red as a tomato and Sirius beside him. He stared at you with a somewhat surprised expression on his face, his mouth slightly ajar. It took him a second before he came forward and pulled you into a tight hug and whispered, “I missed you” his breath tickling your ear. You blushed and slowly pulled away from him.

After you all settled down, you told them about your trip to India. Sirius had spent most of the summer at James’s house and the way their eyes sparkled mischievously, you knew they had done much more than have some “fun”. Remus had spent his summer engrossed in the books you’d lent him. Having read through your collection more than 3 times and knowing Remus would take good care of them, you had given them all to him for the summer. Peter had travelled to the country side with his family.

When you’d finally reached the great hall, you couldn’t wait for the sorting to get over and to dig into the feast prepared by the school elves. You were sitting beside Lily who had pulled your ear on seeing you. (“Y/n Y/l/n! You had no time to see me!”)

James who sat in front of you was continually giving you looks, pestering you to make Lily talk to him. After a while, you started ignoring him all together because you knew how infuriated lily would get if you did that just now. Lily and you talked about your vacations. You told her how your sister wanted to give you this big makeover and you just took the opportunity. Lily listened to you a small frown occurring in her eyes. You asked her about it.

“Nothing, it’s just that my own sister Petunia hates me. I wish I had same relationship you have with your sister.” Lily told you. “But anyways, I love your new look and I could already see the boy’s heads turning in you direction” she said wriggling her eyebrows.

“Lily!” you said smacking her arm.

Lily giggled and you couldn’t help but wonder about her. You two always had been close friends but you couldn’t spend that much time with each other as you had the marauders and she, Snape. Now, when she just told you about her sister, you couldn’t help but worry a little. It was the same way Sirius had first mentioned Regulus. You saw how she just mentioned her with a sad glint in her eyes before brushing it away. You doubted that Lily had someone she could talk to about this. Although she was friends with the other dorm-mates you knew that the two of you were the closest. You decided in that moment that you would at least try to strengthen your friendship with her.

When you were both ready to sleep in your respective dorm rooms, you took her into the bathroom with you so that others wouldn’t hear. You pestered her to sneak out. She glared at you but you could be persuasive when you wanted to. She put up a good fight before finally giving in.

“Y/n, if I get caught you would be responsible”

“What would teachers say?”

“I am a prefect; I am supposed to stop these things”

“Y/n you are a bad influence on me”

“Y/n are you even listening to me?”

You huffed. You could very well see beneath the annoyed façade that Lily was enjoying herself. She couldn’t even keep the small smile off her face. You wouldn’t lie if you said that she had a mischievous side to her. You smirked.

“You need to stay quiet. I know that this is your first time sneaking out, but trust me I won’t let you get caught.” You told her.

“Okay”

As you reached the fruit bowl painting you couldn’t help but put in a bit of drama.

“Lily Evans, my closest dorm mate, (Lily face palmed) I present to you my secret of bringing snacks to our dorm. Now, I am only letting you know this because you, yes you NEED to loosen up a bit and also you’ve proved yourself to be worthy to me”

You made wide hand gestures as you entered the kitchens. After Lily decided she had looked around enough, you both sat down drinking some hot chocolate. The two of you laughed and joked around talking about everything from the teachers to the portraits at Hogwarts. You were mildly surprised to find Lily having this wild side to her. She was fierce and bold and definitely not the girl who followed every single school rule. You could see how perfect she was for James, but you didn’t raise your opinions just yet.

“Tell me, why hadn’t we done this before?” Lily asked, her face as red as her hair, from laughing all the way up to the common room.

“You insisted on following the rules so much, that’s why.” You told her smiling. You both went up to your dorm plopping down on the mattress, soon falling into deep slumber.

Next morning, when you went down the breakfast table you couldn’t help but feel a little sleepy due to the last night’s endeavours. You poured yourself a large cup of coffee and piled on some toast and fruit. You saw Sirius come in flirting with some Ravenclaw girl. You huffed and felt that familiar pinch yet again. You were tired, tired of pinning after the boy who would never reciprocate your feelings. When you were going through the makeover, you thought that maybe, maybe Sirius would notice you. But he clearly never did or ever will. You mentally cursed James and Remus for putting the little hope in your head.

Your thoughts were interrupted by someone calling your name. You turned around and saw Sebastian, Ruuhaan, Alex, Charlotte and Grace smirking at you. Over the years you all had become great friends. They were all from different houses. Sebastian and Charlotte from Ravenclaw, Alex and Grace from Hufflepuff and Ruuhaan from Slytherin.

“How come we are last to know about your new look?” Alex asked smirking at you.

“What? You don’t like it?” you said twirling around so they could see your striped culotte jumpsuit.

“Oh everyone loves it” Ruuhaan said winking at you. You smiled as the group fell into an easy conversation.

“So, Sunday 2pm we start this year’s study session” Grace said as she started to leave.

“I really can’t wait to go back and study” You said in a high pitched tone, sarcasm dripping from every syllable. Sebastian sniggered as Grace smacked you.

“That hurt!!” you pouted.

“We just don’t study and you know it! Anyways, remind Remus too.” Grace said.

You looked back seeing Lily sitting alone eating her breakfast. You glanced at the Slytherin table to see Snape sitting with Malfoy, Avery and Mulciber.

“Can I bring Lily too? She’s real nice outside the prefect duties and being the perfect student” You asked.

“Of course why not?” Charlotte said. “Besides Ruuhaan is bringing his crush, Candice too.” she added winking.

Ruuhaan blushed. He had a crush on Candice for years and had gathered the courage to talk to her after huge amount of pestering from you all.

“So, it’s settled then!” Sebastian cut in saving Ruuhaan from any teasing. As they slowly went their ways you plopped down next to Lily and saw James and Peter had already taken seats opposite to you and were eating. Remus always came in the last moment at breakfast being the sleepy head he was.

“Lily, are you free this Sunday 2pm?” you asked Lily.

“Yes. Why?”  

“Okay so I have this study group I go to where we usually do our homework but time to time we also have fun. There are people from all the houses and honestly speaking; we get our work done earlier than most people. I mean with different views, loads of notes and research work from 7 different people does make things easier.” You explained.

“So, this is the actual reason you score at least an “E” in every class? I’m impressed. I didn’t know there were people who take their homework seriously.” Lily said an amused look on her face.

“Am I hearing a yes?” you said delighted.

“I’ll be there.”

The first day was exhausting. You had gone through double potions and herbology. Teachers were all on about how you needed to work hard for the upcoming owls and you had already got 3 essays to write by the next week. So, as you moved towards the last class, defense against the dark arts, you were hoping to get over with it as soon as possible.

You sat beside James and Sirius who were in the same predicament as you were. Professor Vane was new defense against the dark arts’ teacher. He was an old man who looked like a walking corpse.

“Settle down please.” He drowned in a monotonous voice and you knew he wouldn’t be able to handle your wild classmates. He went and sat on a high chair facing the class and remained there for the entirety of the lesson. He went on about how although you all would be practicing certain spells the main focus would be on the theory. You groaned internally. Great, just great. With Voldermort on the rise, the increasing tension in the wizarding world, you wouldn’t even be taught about how to handle yourself in a battle. You were passionate about the things you believed in and stopping this pureblood mania was one of them. So, as he droned on and on about different spells and their usage you couldn’t help but be disappointed.

While the class went on, James mindlessly writing lily on the corners of the page filling it with small hearts, Sirius winking and passing notes with Marlene (you were glaring at him, but apparently he never noticed) ; an idea struck you. When the class finished you beckoned the marauders to a small corner.

“Listen, I have an idea. I don’t think Vane is ever going to teach us anything useful and I want to be able to defend myself and be strong enough to go on missions against the death eaters.” You looked to see the boys faces darkened with a grim expression.

“What I am trying to propose is a club. Not like the duelling club where people go to have some fun. I want to learn things that would help me keep myself and others safe. I have seen the procedure for making the club and I am sure we would be allowed if we followed the rules. People can teach each other what we are best at. Remus can help us with attacking spells; Lily can with the defensive ones and I could help teach others basic healing procedures- spells and potions. That’s what it is about in the end, isn’t it? Helping each other? Staying strong together?” you spoke out.

The boys took a moment thinking about what you just said. You knew they were as eager to learn as you were. Remus spoke up first.

“I’m in” Remus said with an expression that told you he was determined to make this work.

“Me too.”

“I’m in”

“Sure. Why not?”

You were positively delighted to see them agreeing.

“But, who else would be there?” James asked.

“Oh, you’ll see. Leave that to me” You added smirking knowing exactly who you were going to call and were sure that they’ll agree.

SERIES MASTERLIST