#anyway i am tired and this is all over the place

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

Hello Sleepy, I hope you’re doing well! This isn’t much of an ask but more of a little gift. I am amazed by your work and the creativity behind your characters, along with the storylines! I hope I am not crossing any boundaries when I say I have drawn your OC Jade. The twist? She met my character (which I’m still working on) in a comic I made for you! I have no intentions on changing your characters storyline or taking any credit of Jade; if I crossed a line or did anything wrong I apologize IMMENSELY.

The comic takes place in London outside Jades florist shop. This is when our characters are on the civilian side and off duty. There was an accident outside of the building and after a long terrible month for Soot (my characters nickname until I finish her biography), she happens to witness the accident. She acts on instinct and adrenaline, leaping right into action to help the victim.

As she addresses the man like routine she hears a voice, it’s a woman. Particularly, it’s Jade who had heard the commotion and investigated. I’d like to think with Jades background and her kind heart she doesn’t hesitate to give a helping hand where it’s needed. Until proper Responders arrived on scene, Soot and Jade were able to help save this man’s life.

Now although the very lazy sketch of a comic I scribbled, I did draw a flat colored picture. This takes place after the accident. Soot, with the routine down to a T, takes the ambulance back to the hospital with the man. She doesn’t interfere with the medical professionals, she’s been there done that, Soot just wants to be there for the patient and for the family when they eventually arrive to the hospital. To answer any questions and possibly provide comfort.

Now PLEASE correct me if I am wrong, I took a wild chance at this— Jade also goes to the hospital, but on her own. She wanted the same thing Soot did, to be there for the family and provide any comfort/closure if possible. It’s rare that this occurrence even happened ecspecially with it right outside her Floral Shop.

As Jade waits in the waiting room patiently for what seems like two hours, she is approached out of nowhere by a familiar figure. The woman she voluntarily gave her helping hands too. As observant as Jade is, she recognizes an exhausted look on this lady’s face that was clearly built over the course of years.

“Thank you,” is gently whispered by Soot to Jade, standing quiet and tired in front of her. They don’t know each other, maybe they eventually will or maybe they won’t. But they worked together like they had known one another forever.

First Encounter:

Again, I hope I did not cross any boundaries. I have no intentions on taking, altering or changing your OC and her storyline! All credit goes to you. I also hope I drew Jade correctly, I read her favorite color is lilac so I included that— braids are so hard to draw help :,)

Anyways, Thank you for your amazing content and keep up the hard work! You are extraordinarily talented at what you do, you should be proud🫶

(sorry for any typos)

WAITTT WAIT WAIT

THIS IS SPECTACULAR, GIVE ME 14 OF THEM RIGHT NYEOW!!!

THE COMIC?? THE ART?? HELP?? Jade would totally do this! I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!! You got it perfectly!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to make this art!! 😭This is such an amazing gift!

[prodixal]

Sinking deeper into his chair, the air of usual cockiness that surrounds him all but disappears. There was a strange sort of relief to be had, in his sisters company, when their conversations turned serious and raw. And he wished they'd allowed themselves more such moments, perhaps if they had, things would have turned out different. Better. Easier.

"I should think Vaelora has more than enough soft things to protect, dear sister. Perhaps what they needs is someone stern enough to rely on as they take care of everything and everyone around them." his index lifts gently from the cup to point her way, as he held it over an arm of his seat. "And you very much are that person." Varyn was certain if Vaelora could find it in them to trust her, then love would come with ease. With necessity. "You are in no need of my advice, nor my opinion, but I shall offer the latter freely nonetheless. So that you may do with it as you please." he did not need her snapping again.

"Mother used to say a head needed its neck. To rest upon, to turn it the right way." he did not know why such a thought occurred to him, only that it did. "And the head above your proverbial neck shall hold extra weight in its crown. She should need...a sturdy neck, a neck she can trust, rely on." his voice is calm, quiet, tired. "Just be their equal. Show them your fire --- a dragon will love you for it. Else I fear..." he tilts his head, leaning forward, placing the cup atop the low table beside him. "You might never get what you're after. Vaelora might be many things, but stupid is not one of them, and should you wish to hide --- they'll know." that much, he was certain. Cersha was good, but she was not good enough to deceive someone who could see through people like they were made of lace. "But who am I? To offer such thoughts to you anyway, huh dear sister?"

Deep down, beneath the gaping black hole where the heart should be - and several layers of selfishness, arrogance and pride - Varyn really did feel the two to be a perfect match. Vaelora had the passion, and the urge to do 'better' than her mother. To do right by people and the crown. Vaelora loved their family, their friends, their name. Vaelora was of good heart, with a strong mind, and a kind of warmth that Cersha shied away from. -- Cersha had the strong intellect, the long lasting desire to for power and rule. She too cared for her family, her name, the crown. To put it simply, Vaelora and Cersha complimented one another in almost every relevant way. So Varyn did not worry, that love would blossom from their union in time, should they both be willing to put aside their differences and open up to that possibility.

But this would remain a private thought.

At her dissection of happiness, fulfilment -- victory, he is thoroughly lost in thought. Varyn had never looked at it that way. For she was right. Happiness was fleeting. An emotion that changed with each candle mark. But victory, glory, a sense of fulfilment? Those were constant. Something to hold on to when sadness, or anger or disappointment strike, and something to relish and be grateful for, in moments of joy.

He would adopt that mindset, perhaps, or study it more up close in days to come. He had much to think about. For his life right now, had consisted of chasing happiness at any cost. Chasing comfort. Chasing emotions so fleeting that even while he had them, part of him always awaited their demise. It was no way to live. But he was also undisciplined, and thirsty of instant gratification.

Such thirst was precisely the reason for his current unfortunate predicament. And he had no one but himself to blame.

As the word 'curious' leaves Cersha's lips, he will frown. "I'm not --" a rookie mistake. "I'm not defending her. It is simply facts. Up until a moment ago you seemed to be fond of those." he should know better than to try reason his way out of this one. It was far too late for that.

What comes next, out of the mouth of his sister, leaves even his own jaw ajar. He knew her to be calculating, to be cold -- but he had never seen the sheer depth of her ruthlessness. He had almost, strangely so, admired it?

"The child lives." the words are quick, defensive, certain. And while he desired nothing more than to believe his sister was willing to do all of this for him, he had also known better. And he made note, not to ever cross her in his life again. The stakes were higher now, and the space for mistakes was growing smaller with every step Cersha took towards her ultimate goal.

Varyn shudders, at the decision he knows he's about to make, and his stomach turns as the heaviness of reality and impending responsibility weighs upon his tired shoulders. "I will marry her. And it shall be as you say."

CERSHA'S EYES ROLL SPECTACULARLY AT HER BROTHER'S EXCUSE FOR A JOKE . it is with a sigh that she moves to pinch at the bridge of her nose , that she replies , " whatever you need tell yourself , varyn ." despite spending near the entirety of her life with him , cersha could never understand the appeal of her brother . as much affection as she may grudgingly have for him it was mind boggling , truly . varyn was varyn , she saw him nakedly as he was and had no other choice but to accept him as that , after all , their blood demanded it . however , all others had a choice in this . and yet they chose varyn regardless . chose not to see the facade that was right in front of them . admittedly , it was times like these that leave cersha quite sure that all those around her were fools . she was sure that if the shoe was on the other foot she could see through varyn with ease . however , she supposes he would say the same for her . perhaps in some ways it was simply a byproduct of their upbringing . " i am not acting like a nervous fool ." cersha tone is near exasperated as she drops her hand , as she squints at him in vague annoyance before arching her brows to add , " this is actually a quite unfamiliar process to you called coherent thought . i hope that you might experience it at some point in the future , but at this point i do quite sincerely doubt it ." vaelora was a puzzle that cersha could solve . she was quite sure of it . after all , she had yet to come across a puzzle she couldn't solve . she'd be damned if the one she failed to was the dragon she was set to wed . " if necessary i intend to play a long game in order to obtain the power i have sought all my life , varyn , yes . perhaps the performance may not be needed forever , and perhaps it may not be absolute . but some part of vaelora seems to wish for something soft to protect . do i appear to be that to you ?" cersha snaps in annoyance at her brother's jabs , her eyes rolling with a scoff as he continues . it is with efficiency that she reaches for the nearest object to throw at him . luckily for him it happens to be the pillow on the chair she is sat at . " yes , well , i do not care what you want , varyn . thankfully , might i add ." she makes a face at him as she turns her attention back to her goblet , lifting it to add , " in fact , i'd rather delight in emulating the exact opposite of what you may want in a sister just to vex you further ." it occurs to her suddenly that she truly had no idea how the targaryens seemed to get along so well . did they not irritate each other ? was it all an act ? at the current moment she is quite sure she would trade her brother for an apple tart . " ah , yes , i am sure you are quite familiar with the later ." cersha brings her goblet to her lips with a roll of her eyes . it is only after a delicate sip that she brings her goblet back down to say , " i am quite familiar with the thin line between love and hate , varyn . however , it would be quite a gamble for me to emulate everything vaelora hates and expect her to love me . i do not particularly enjoy gambling with my fate where it is not necessary . leaving my wife-to-be's love for me up to the gods and chance ." a twist of her lips . " how can i trust in such things ? i trust in me , varyn ." a huff . " and if there is a surer path to victory i will take it ." an arch of her brows as her eyes meet his squarely . "so unless there is need to pivot —  to gamble — the plan will stay the same ."

despite herself , cersha can't say she's entirely unaffected by varyn's confidence . while she would do what she wished either way , and while her own confidence wouldn't waver for it , the belief that her family had in her only added to her pride . she would rather swallow a sword than admit it of course . but there was something to be said about having someone in her corner . cersha was notably not alone . lions move in packs after all . so she lets him tap his goblet to hers with a nod , her eyes sure until she is blinking at the strange question . her brows furrow . " happiness is fleeting , varyn ." cersha says simply as she moves to take a sip from her goblet . " i could be happy in the next candle mark and then deeply angry in the next two ." a shrug . " i'm sure there will be joy after my goal is achieved but what i know there will be is satisfaction . fulfilment ." cersha's spine straightens a bit then , a steely glint of triumph in her eyes as she says , " victory . that is more important than mere happiness to me ." she shrugs as she waves a hand dismissively . " and i'm sure happiness will come with it ." winning was something that cersha had become used to . it was a driving force . a goal , in all things . she would be victorious . she would be better . she would outsmart the competition , and then , once she stood on top of the defeated she would laugh at them from above . better . smarter . superior . after all , it is only the best who could seize what they wanted . and cersha was that . it was because she was the best that she was well suited to be queen . she was sure of it . and it was not merely a prize , her skills made her aligned with the position . once she was queen she would cement herself in history as the best at that too . after all, who was her competition . visenya ? it was laughable . she would trump viserys too whilst she was at it . aegon the first as well . and whoever else laid before her . in all honestly , it was fortuitous that cersha was in this position . if she wasn't perhaps she would be fighting for the spot of head of house . she may as well be , with how much of the family mess she took on . as varyn speaks her fingers come up to rub her temples . " enough . you disgust me and any more talk of your preferences in your conquests will have me prepared to lose the contents of my stomach ." cersha says as she brings her hand back down to her goblet , her finger trailing up and down the stem . her brows arch tiredly as her brother continues , her tone blunt as she says , " you see fit to defend her ?" cersha studies him briefly , before she's turning her attention to her wine with a simple, " how curious ." it is something to take note of , cersha supposes . her judgement was absolute in all things . very few were free from it . but it was interesting to note the individuals that people tried to shield from it . it spoke to innerworkings ; vulnerabilities . cersha takes note . if not for her own knowledge , then perhaps for varyn's sake . " yes , well , again i did expect you to father a thousand bastards ." cersha's eyes roll . " i suppose i should only be glad that it has taken this long . although , who's to say ? i certainly would not put it passed you to have more in the shadows , dear brother . perhaps some you are still even wholly unaware of ." another sigh as raises her goblet to take another healthy gulp . it is only once she's put the goblet back down and licked her lips of the bitterness that she says , " if i were truly anticipating my own stress i would have had you castrated long ago and been done with it ." it feels almost like an act of affection that she doesn't . after all , it was only the most logical of solutions , even if it were perhaps a bit messy . however , even now when varyn presumably has a heir to succeed him and will have little need for other children to follow , it is not an option she even truly entertains . she supposes love really does blind you .

cersha studies her brother as he speaks , her eyes scrutinizing as they scan every inch of his face from the way his eyes avoid hers to the careful sip of wine he takes . cersha studies thoroughly and files away . cersha takes only a moment to bask in the position of power she holds in this moment . at the act of her brother needing her help and asking for it . for a younger sister this was quite something to brag over . if only it wasn't also so deeply frustrating . " if she loves the child , then we can use that to our advantage ." cersha says simply then , tone cool with rationale as she eyes her brother with a hawklike gaze . her brow arches . " we can take quite a literal approach to that and threaten said child . a mother's instincts are usually quite predictable ." cersha shrugs as she moves to take a sip from her goblet . " 'speak on this and you both shall suffer' is a simple enough solution , so that is an option ." she gestures to her brother with her goblet then , meeting his eyes to say , " however , if we truly wanted to be rid of the problem , the child could die ." another shrug . " however , if it is tied back to us that may make enemies of the daynes , and that would be rather unfortunate . but it does close the book on this , if that is what you prefer ." cersha hums thoughtfully . she swirls the wine in her goblet with lazy twists of her wrist . she has little intention to actually kill a child . after all , such a thing was truly a last resort . death was a messy option . it left trails of blood in its wake and unless one was very , very careful that trail tended to lead towards equally bloody hands . cersha was very careful . but even still . " however , if this woman loves you or if you can make her love you , as you seem to so freely boast about ." cersha's eyes roll as she waves a hand dismissively towards her brother . " then make her love you anew . come to her in the night in the picture of romance and profess sweet nothings to her ." cersha gestures with her goblet . " tell her you have made a grave mistake and wish to be a family , that this all made you realize the error of your ways ; whatever it takes , you understand . and once you have been sufficiently convincing , get on a knee and propose . in private of course ." cersha meets varyn's eyes pointedly . " and once that is done we will have you both wed . secretly of course . i can have the papers forged to reflect a different date , that is of little consequence . you can both announce it after the announcement of my own betrothal . you will not steal this moment from me , varyn ." cersha makes sure to meet her brothers eyes pointedly again as she gestures to him with her goblet . " ... and once that is done you can spin the tale that you were both so deeply in love that you married during your time in dorne ." the words are accompanied with nonsensical flourishes of her hand , cersha's tone becoming mocking as she mimics the fools that surround her as she says , " and would you look ! such love has resulted in such a beautiful child ! oh hurrah , oh hurray . wine ! celebration !" another roll of cersha's eyes before she shrugs and says , " and with that it is done and you are a father , varyn . congratulations ." it is with a sigh that cersha sits back in her seat , brow arching as she looks at her brother then . there is a curious part of her that wants to test his own judgement . her brows arch . " so , what will it be then ? threat , death , or marriage ?"

[local-limebug]

vent under the cut

i hate. i don't hate anything in particular but recently, i've just been full of hatred. and i'm not even being a hater online about it. i left most of my groupchats and removed a ton of people from my instagram (self isolation ftw). i either hate all my friends or i hate myself. most likely both. i really want to get drunk on vodka, it's been so long. i need to get a job. i am tired. i want to start a fight with my friends. i wanna be bitchy. i'm definitely having some sort of episode but i've never felt this way before. guess i unlocked a new level of mental illness. i have an appointment in november with a psychiatrist for an assessment of schizoid pd. i really just wanna get out of my own head, so i've been turning to substance abuse recently. sadly, i am out of substances and underage and have no money and my older friends/family won't get me more because i've been doing it a bit too much. my mind is a very shitty place to be in these days, especially since i am currently also lacking a hyperfixation. no daydreams in my brain to cushion the bad shit.

[intotheelliwoods]

Guess who got to see a Solar Eclipse at the 4 Corners! (the bobble leos did. this trip was for them actually- they didnt even pay for gas)

[knightbird]

first this was a sketch to make fun of stevens pose but then i was dazzled and enraptured by metagross' shiny carapace and the alluring pokemon center carpets

[dollypopup]

y'all can all cancel me (again) for this, but if there's even a SHRED of 'who should I pick?' from Penelope in season 3, I am tuning out SO fast because like. . .sorry not sorry, there IS no choice. Debling is some crusty OC suitor she barely even knows and Colin is a man who she has been so supposedly in love with to the point where she'd ruin her entire family's reputation to have a potential love story with him. Penelope and Colin have background, years of knowing each other, intimacy that few people in the Ton can boast of having (letters, conversations about purpose, fights and arguments and makeups) and her and Debling have. . .a dance or two at a ball because he's a rebound for Penelope's broken heart. he means nothing. he has no nuance, he has no weight to the story, he is such an afterthought to me. either I wanna see Penelope going 'you know what? I don't even LIKE this dude. he's. . .fine, but I don't care about him even a shred as much as I care about Colin' or the INSTANT Colin's like 'you know what? we should get married' if it's not an immediate 'say less, you're already my husband, try returning me without the receipt, Debling whomst?' then I don't want it!

like. . .it's just so frustrating to see all the 'I hope Debling sweeps her off her feet and she rejects Colin's proposal and she makes him work for it and and and-' nonsense from the fandom and it's always tagged and no matter how many times I block it, it just keeps popping up. I go into the Polin tag for POLIN. I don't give a SHIT about a male love interest other than Colin. Not one. Not a shred. Not an iota.

and also. . .Debling has the 'benefit' of not having depth, or character traits, or HISTORY, so peeps can project onto him however they want, but I'm calling it now, there is NOTHING he could do or be that would make me like him more than Colin. Colin will always hit different, and I will always love him more. and if Pen's not on that same page? lol bye

you want me to believe Penelope and Colin are soulmates and it's romance for her to hem and haw about how difficult a decision it is for her to marry a stranger who knows barely anything about her. . .

when Marina was out here dropping banger lines like 'You were the only man with which I could see myself being happy' and 'I do not care about any of these men, where is Colin?'? like hello??? and she wasn't even fully in love with him!!!! but we'll demonize her until the cows come home in our fandom and make her the villain in Polin's love story for DARING to get in between Polin, yet Debling, a white man, is a darling dear perfect prince for getting in between Polin? existing in our fandom solely so Penelope can be like 'lol, Colin ain't shit, let me entertain any and everyone else'?

if that's the direction it goes then, ten toes down and on my mama, she doesn't deserve Colin and she can move because I'm on my way to court him my damn self

and that's that on that

[icewindandboringhorror]

Pictures and things

[iamthepulta]

The best thing about Italy and Europe is that linen just- exists here. I can go buy a shitty cheap 100% linen dress like I would go to Fry's and buy a shitty cheap 100% polyester dress in America. Absolutely revolutionary for my wardrobe. I can't actually buy wardrobe enhancements because I have a carry-on suitcase, but the fact I still have the option is amazing.

[indigodawns]

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[stormyoceans]

Monica, you obviously won't be able to sleep tonight😁

MOOD BOARD FOR WHEN IT'S 5 AM AND YOU'RE STILL RIDING THE SHEER MANIC UNHINGED RABID ENERGIES OF YOUR CLOWNERY STARTING TO LOOK MORE LIKE A GENUINE POSSIBILITY

WOULD LOVE TO SAY IM EXAGGERATING BUT ALAS. IF WE SERIOUSLY GENUINELY TRULY LEGITIMATELY ACTUALLY HONEST TO GOD FR GET JIMMYSEA AS INTHU AND THAPFAH IM GONNA BECOME THE MOST INSUFFERABLE HUMAN BEING WHO HAS EVER WALKED ON PLANET EARTH PAST PRESENT AND FUTURE IM SO SERIOUS RN

[sunshineram]

to quote my brother: what a week these past three days have been

[leave-me-alone-please]

How can I survive this winter?

[lupe-jess]

well. that was definitely an episode..

my thoughts on the episode/show overall for now:

hong jo and shin yu were so fucking cute this episode it almost killed me

i'm glad they're not having a baby yet but shin yu's parents having a baby instead.. why the fuck. she was gonna divorce that asshole 😭😭 one drunk sorry does not make up for years of (verbal) abuse

also also shin yu why the fuck would u tell your parents about the 'baby' without telling hong jo first??? that was not cute at all

i did not understand ms ma like she was dead set against marriage and the next scene they're getting married.. do the women in this show not get a say in anything or.. hello writers???

i'm glad hong jo and shin yu got their happy ending but sad we barely got any answers

anyway the show overall: solid idea but the execution needs some work lmao i loved the romcom stuff and all the silliness. the curse/red hand was well done and i loved that it turned out to be hong jo's hand (kudo's to everyone who figured that out only a few episodes in)

i loved how hong jo stood her ground, against that creep and na yeon. i'm so proud of her and she really has grown stronger since the start of the show. hong jo ily forever <3

speaking of that creep: i hate to say it but he was a great villian he really creeped me out

overall a fun show to watch, i'm gonna do a rewatch soon (soon = probably tomorrow lmao i already miss them)

this was the first time i've seen jo bo ah and rowoon in anything and they were both amazing, their chemistry 🔥🔥🔥🔥 sometimes i'd almost forget they were acting. i'm definitely gonna check out more of their stuff (please send me recommendations)

[snekdood]

Your impulse to believe every last bad thing people say about a guy and then if that guy is victimized by those people or the people who spread the rumors you dont even try to look into if thats even the case, you just assume hes bad by default-- yeah thats incredibly unfair to guys who are victims of abuse.

[dandyshucks]

even online i cannot escape middle-aged adults trying to tell me their life story and hit on me,,,,,,,,, help,,,,,

[lucarioguy15]

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