#correct she is about sussing them out on their bullshit.

[snekdood]

Your impulse to believe every last bad thing people say about a guy and then if that guy is victimized by those people or the people who spread the rumors you dont even try to look into if thats even the case, you just assume hes bad by default-- yeah thats incredibly unfair to guys who are victims of abuse.

[antoine-roquentin]

i’ve noticed that my shorthand critique of the “south park caused anti-semitism” theory of media has been getting some attention, and it’s funny cause it dovetails with another round of “the youtube algorithm is responsible for turning everybody into nazis” rhetoric as well, sparked by a recent new york times article. this sort of navelgazing is pretty popular because it works nicely with beliefs that both elites and liberals in general have, namely, that public opinion needs to be managed by an enlightened few, that some people are too stupid to participate in civic life and that’s why right wing populists get elected, and that if people are educated correctly, they will simply accept that liberalism is the best model for society. in short, it’s behaviorism, namely, the hypodermic needle model of media.

the liberal elite in interwar america believed themselves to be creating a better society through management of public opinion. figures like walter lippman were committed to benevolent elite rule through the manipulation of opinion, the “manufacturing of consent”. many of them came out of the milieu of manipulating popular opinion through propaganda work in the first world war, successfully convincing americans to join and support the british side in that war. edward bernays, for instance, worked for the committee on public information, the “largest propaganda machine the world had ever seen“, before becoming the intellectual forebear of the public relations industry in america. he and other similar figures, like lippman, carl byoir, and charles merriam (who combined behaviouralism with political science), were the leading lights of the “Progressive” movement of the time. they relied on the notion that media was passively consumed by people, who simply accepted the claims made without hesitation and then acted accordingly. the psychological theories behind this found form as a body of work known as behavioralism. human beings had a set of limited or “latent” responses to stimuli. by providing the correct stimuli, human beings could be made to behave accordingly. one day, society would be governed by the truly intelligent who would suss out the correct stimuli through trial and error and then apply them to the masses, a society of pavlov’s dogs. this top-down model not coincidentally empowered liberal elites to do what they will without any input from the masses.

this was termed the “hypodermic needle” or “magic bullet” model of media. both of these are medical terms, the latter referring to a drug that treats only the disease without any side effects, and that’s quite telling. american progressives have traditionally exalted medicine as a neutral, rational way to develop a better society. many were advocates of eugenics as a form of medicine, “cleaning” the human race of its “unfit” members. recently, there’s been a strong resurgence of interest in eugenics, behavioralism, and the use of medical terminology to describe media (viral video, using the metaphor of contagion).

proponents of the model in the 1930s referred to the success of the nazis in their use of mass media (ironically, using the same propaganda techniques they’d developed. joseph goebbels was known to be a reader of bernays’ books) as well as the payne fund studies, a series of works done on the responses of children to movies with poor methodology and funded by oil magnates hoping to drive moral panics (the hays code was strongly influenced by them), and the panicked reaction to the 1938 orson welles radio production of war of the worlds in support. of course, all three of these shared very specific material conditions of the people involved that drove them to react in the manner they did apart from the media involved in persuasion. for the decade after the first world war, while germany muddled along without growth but also without significant collapse, the nazis failed to attract more than a few percentage points of electoral support, despite consistently using similar tactics. it was only after the economic collapse of germany, when the economy had shrunk by about a quarter, that the nazis gained traction. even then, this was by using the failures of a liberal constitution to turn their electoral base, only one third of voters who were largely based in rural areas and included almost nobody in the major cities, into a workable governing coalition, particularly by playing on the fact that german liberals feared communism much more than nazism. likewise, the panic over war of the worlds was largely a myth created by newspapers which feared they were losing their audience to a new, more dynamic form of media and wanted to stoke a moral panic (see a parallel with the nyt story?). those who were convinced that an invasion was occurring, according to a study done afterwards (in part by theodor adorno), for the most part had only heard a bit and were concerned about a german invasion, given the heightened geopolitical tensions at the time, or were from the town of concrete, washington, which suffered a blackout midway through the performance.

you can see the same sort of threads in the nyt story, while the important parts go ignored by twitterati eager to engage on the most superficial level. “young men discover far-right videos by accident“ thanks to “YouTube and its recommendation algorithm“, “the most frequent cause of members’ “red-pilling”“ according to a study done by the NED(ie western intelligence)-funded bellingcat, after which they fall “ down the alt-right rabbit hole” as passive subjects reacting to stimuli. clearly, these videos spread like a contagion, and it’s our job to ban them in favour of much more legitimate content that supports major western foreign policy objectives. oh wait, hold up, mr cain was a “college dropout struggling to find his place in the world“, at a time of wage stagnation and a tough job market for newer entries that’s especially pronounced as you go further down the education ladder? he “grew up in postindustrial Appalachia”, an area destroyed by rapacious neoliberalism that has increasingly seen its industries move offshore in search of lower wages, its most dynamic members leave for major cities due to a lack of jobs, and those that remain become increasingly socially isolated, prompting them to either resort to social media or kill themselves through drugs and guns in what famed economist angus deaton calls “deaths of despair” (not to mention the limiting of public spaces to those who can pay, another aspect of neoliberalism, which particularly drives teens like mr cain into "online games with his friends”)? in a world where capitalism justifies itself by telling those it fails over and over that it’s their own fault, that they need to improve themselves and that there is no such thing as structural problems because, in the words of margaret thatcher, “there is no such thing [as society]! only individual men and women”, mr cain was drawn to propaganda masquerading as a self-help grift with an emphasis on supposedly knowing more than the brainwashed masses (”To Mr. Cain, all of this felt like forbidden knowledge“)?

most of all though is the fact that most of the people cain watched are either funded directly or take most of their talking points from a network of right wing intellectuals cultivated by major dark money backers for decades. david rubin takes money from dennis prager, who in turn is funded by fracking billionaires and evangelical christians the wilks brothers, and the bradley foundation, who have funded literally every major right wing cause of note. lauren southern is only famous because she worked for rebel media, funded by much of the oil industry including the kochs as well as the bradley foundation. paul joseph watson is associated with ukip and its funder arron banks. gad saad is funded by molson coors, whose corporate heads not only once praised hitler but founded the most famous republican think tank in the country, the heritage foundation. two of the major members of the “intellectual dark web”, charles murray and christina hoff sommers, work directly for the heritage foundation. and other youtube luminaries of note, like alex jones, thunderf00t, and stefan molyneux, make their money solely by doing interviews with these people and by citing material produced from these think tanks. in a world where inequality is increasingly dividing the rich and the working class, the former spend more and more on maintaining the division, while the latter are driven into a state of fear in which absurd theories about the collapse of western civilization and their replacement with latin american and muslim people seems much more reasonable. There’s also the social isolation that makes youtube celebs and discord chat buddies seem less like distant weirdos and more like the only friends one has. 

the solution, of course, is to modify youtube’s algorithm. just a bit of top-down tweaking to educate the masses on their correct course. surely, nobody would be stupid enough to think that the material conditions created by the neoliberal elite in the past few decades has driven a complete collapse in trust in american society, to the point where only a third of americans "trust their government “to do what is right”“, compared to over 80% of chinese people. surely this breakdown in trust is due to youtube and not the complete economic decimation of the country by its elites, to the point where many rural counties have not even recovered the jobs they lost a decade ago. a redistribution of wealth should not even be on the table, because material conditions play no part in how people react to media. just accept your daily helping of bullshit from the bourgeoisie and never question them when they say certain people need to be censored, because the powers you let them have will never be abused or turned against you in any way. and hey, don’t listen to any critiques of behaviorism, because it’s not like anarchists blew that shit out of the water in the 1950s.

[imaginemycroftholmes]

@grand-admiral-luna

“No one can know about her,” Moriarty fussed to his loyal sidekick Sebby, the Terror Tiger, looked unfazed by the declaration from his boss.

This wasn’t something new to him considering their gigs as superheroes for the greater part of London.

As Pyro Professor and Terror Tiger they constantly battled with the evil masterminds such as Ice Man, Purple Pirate or even worse, tango with their favorite henchman, Captain Action.

It was always a game of cat and mouse as the lone duo tried to rid the city of their influence and control while managing to evade arrest. A deed, most annoying slow considering Mycroft Holmes aka Ice Man had his hand in the pockets of every major business and authority.

To have their own sibling Eurus as their mole was a blessing the city couldn’t afford to lose as she had a watchful eye on both her brothers evil schemes. 

“Boss, if the Ice Man and Purple Pirate haven’t caught onto our real identities by now then I don’t think we have to worry about it,” Sebby rationalizes to Jim, “I mean they still won’t come to terms that the Holmes brothers are villains so why worry about us?”

“Because if they figure out who we are our families will be in danger,” Jim stresses, “They  could be used as bait or worse!”

 This isn’t the first time that Jim had gone off like this about his sister _____ after a difficult foiling of the dastardly duo but this is one of the few times it was too close for comfort.

However, being an orphan of war Sebastian can’t imagine what it feels like to lose someone but if its anything by the way Jim acts he know it can’t be good.

Not one of them could figure out why or how ______ kept ending up near their battles but it was starting  to put Jim on edge and when Jim is on edge then he’s crawling up his back with complaints that makes him want to claw off the backs of the infamous Holmes brothers just to make Jim stop crying.

And he just got his titanium claws resharpened just for the occasion. 

Watching and (tuning out) his boss’s ramblings about keeping his sister safe Sebastian turns his attention to the big screen showing off the city’s zones praying for a distraction when a cellphone rings.

“I’m holding out for a hero! I’m holding out for a hero until the morning's light..”

If it wasn’t for the fact that Jim was surrounded by some of his most dangerously sensitive bombs-the ones that only required just a light pressure to set off- Sebastian might have found it funny how he fumbled for his phone to answer it. 

With his cat-like reflexes he swooped in to drag the the nervous man from dropping his device on what would be an instant death for them both and answered the phone for him.

“Hello?”

“Sebby,” comes an excited voice from the other line, “It’s great to hear you! How has the canning business going with you two lately?”

Sebastian winces both at the moniker that ____ picked up from her brother and the fact that she still believes that lie.

How anyone believes that lie is beyond him but then again, people still can’t believe that Sherlock Holmes is the Purple Pirate DESPITE WEARING THE SAME OUTFIT EACH TIME BUT ONLY PURPLE. THERE’S NO MASK TO OBSCURE HIS FACE OR HAIR BUT WHEN HE TRIES TO SHOW PEOPLE THAT THEY THINK HE’S “CRAZY”.

But thanks to his ever witty and not good with lies on the spot partner the first thing that came out of his mouth for their nightly activities is starting a canning business and they’re in a relationship.

Needless to say, this puts a damper on his dating life but for the life of him Sebastian doesn’t have the heart to cheat on Jim for fear of _____’s private version of “You hurt him and I’ll make sure you have a 4 year slow death in the backyard tool shed back in Sussex where no one can hear you scream.”

If ______ is anywhere near as bad as Moriarty Sebastian doesn’t want to be on her bad side. 

“Yeah, its going great _____,” Sebastian says convincingly while shooting a glare at Jim who is piteously trying to reach for his phone, “So what are you up to sunshine?”

“I’m so glad you asked,” she continues with enthusiasm, “You see, I met this guy...”

“You met a guy you say,” Sebastian parrots loudly knowing good and well that it would send her brother into a rage.

“A GUY?? WHO IS HE?? SEB! GIVE ME BACK MY PHONE!”

It really shouldn’t bring Sebastian as much joy as it does but Jim jumping desperately to retrieve his phone but it does and he continues to torment him.

“So what? you want me and Jim to meet him,” Sebastian carries on causally like Jim isn’t trying to scale him.

And failing.

“Yeah, actually. I’ve kinda been seeing him for over 2 months now and want him to get acquainted with you guys because I might be bringing him home for Christmas this year,” she states with more confidence than her brother wearing spandex tights.

“Ya know that’s a pretty big step in a relationship right?”

“I know,” _____ agrees, “But this guy is just so right for me that I don’t feel like its too big of  deal.”

  ‘Yeah I know,” Sebastian concedes, “But you know that your brother is going to have kittens right?”

“Well, that’s why I want you to come with. Nothing can settle someone down like their spouse am I right?”

“Spouse...right...”

“Speaking of which is my brother around?”

Looking around and finding that Jim had skunked off somewhere was alarming.The guy never gave up that easily which was why he was the Purple Pirate’s favorite target. 

“I think he may have ran to the loo-” Sebastian tries to say before an image of terror, Moriarty running full speed with one of his guns toward him with a battle cry of “GIVE ME MY PHONE” being heard throughout the hide out. 

“No, wait! ____, here he is,” Sebastian cries as he throws the device at Jim and runs for cover.

The phone is quickly caught by Jim who purrs his hellos to her and then promptly hangs up.

Sebastian doesn’t have to turn around from his hiding spot to know that its Moriarty standing behind him. His voice is dark and deadly as he leans closer.

“You tease me like that again when ______ is calling and I’ll clip those claws permanently.” 

“Yes boss,” Sebastian responds carefully knowing that when Jim is in one these moods that his life can very well be in forfeit because for all of Jim’s silliness he was a damn genius with an affinity for violence and murder. 

He could only shudder of what horrors Moriarty would unleash if he had not been on the side of angels.

“So, when are we meeting him?”

“Next Tuesday at 6″, Jim spats coldly, ‘And you had better not make us late.”

“You know that’s not my faul-” Sebastian says defensively until he sees the look of murder in his boss’s eyes. “I mean, sure boss,” he corrects himself, “are you going to use Eurus to spy on the bloke?”

“Of course I am! Why wouldn’t I want to know the scum who’s shacking up with my sister? I want to know who he is, what he does and what he shits to see if he’s good enough for her! I wanna maul the guy with all the dirt I have on him so he’ll fuck off and leave us alone.”

Poor guy Sebastian thinks as his boss stalks off to Skype Eurus he can’t be all bad if ____ likes him.

                                XxXxXxX

“YOU.”

“Believe me the feeling is mutual.”

“Guys, can we settle down please! We’re in a public place!!”

“You gotta be kidding me.”

Here, sitting before him in the flesh in one of his bespoken suits, is the Ice Man at one of the nicer restaurants in London acting like he’s an honest to God good man beside Jim’s sister. 

Like the guy hadn’t tried to murder them last week for foiling their slave labor camps in India or tortured them on occasion.

And to make matters worse his hand is on _____’s thigh, oh my God Jim is going to murder him before the waiter even arrives.

________ has her hands up as is to stop her brother from launching himself over the table to fight and pronounces quickly, “I can explain!”

Well this would explain why Eurus couldn’t find information on him Sebby muses as the air becomes frigid. 

Crap, its one of Ice Man’s classic moves Sebastian thinks as other civilains begin to feel the icy sting.

“Explain what,” Jim spits out venomously, “that this monster brainwashed you into thinking that it loves you? That not even you can recognizes that he’s the Ice Man, the man responsible for the poverty and waste in our country? That he’s so evil that members of his own family are trying to end his tyranny?”

“Jimmy!”

“Now you see here, you two-bit genius,” Mycroft interjects, “I may make up causes and strife for my own gain but my love for ______ is one of the few things from me that are true.”

“Bullshit! You’re just using her to get to me!”

“Why would he want you when you already have Sebby,” _____ cries.

“I’m not gay!”

Sebastian can already see their waiter in the distance looking far too nervous to approach the shouting match that was their table so he shooed him off with a “come back later.”

Realizing that this would not only lead to a needless blood bath but to unmasking their identities to the public Sebastian tries his attempt to at least save this meal.

Tapping his glass to get their collective attention Sebastian starts,” Shut the hell up, you guys are causing a scene.”

Pointing at Mycroft accusing Jim begins to mouth out, “But he started-”

“I don’t care who started this I told you to shut up!”

He looks around the table at the lot of them.

______ looking confused and hurt that anyone would accuse Mycroft of anything less than sainthood, Mycroft torn between tearing ____ away with him like the villain he is or staying to suss out any evil intent toward her and Jim seemingly five seconds from ignoring the command to maul the Ice Man outright.

Praying to whatever deity that cursed him into a situation like this Sebastian began. “Look, we can’t outright believe that Ice Ma-I mean, Mycroft has the best intentions toward you _______-”Only to be interrupted by Jim’s HA!

Giving Jim a glare Sebastian continues, “However, JIM, we also can’t lawfully say that Mycroft’s feelings aren’t true because we aren’t mind readers.”

“I bet I can find us one on Craigslist!”

“Jimmy shut the hell up,” ______ hisses before gesturing for Sebastian to carry on. “So, my proposal is that we, Jim and I, monitor you two just to make sure that you’re safe.”

“But I’m 32,” ______ complains, “I’m too old for a chaperone!”

“Listen, I’m doing what I can _____. It’s either this or Jim’s going to try and murder Mycroft when you’re not around. It’s a compromise.”

“As if he could after all this time,” Mycroft snidely remarks.

“Maybe I just didn’t have the right motivation,” Jim counters getting squared up.

“Promises, promises,” Mycroft teases as he gestures for a waiter,” Besides we both know who the better genius is.”

“Yeah, your little sister.”

The air was becoming increasingly frigid to the point where Sebby was sure that he would have to evacuate people from the premises until _____ leaned onto Mycroft’s shoulder, melting away the frost.

“Guys, guys! Let’s stop the banter and eat! I’ve been dying to try this menu for ages,” _______ says cuddling Mycroft’s chill into submission.

“Anything you wish ______,” Mycroft says fondly in a way that makes Jim’s skin crawl.

Later after the bill was (fought over) and paid for  _____ hung back with him while Mycroft and Jimmy went to “talk” about some ground rules in private.

 “Sebby, why do Mycroft and Jimmy hate each other,” she asked innocently, “I know they never went to school together and Mycroft rarely leaves his office so how would they know each other enough to despise one another?”

Cursing his boss and this ridiculousness of their town Sebastian states, “We’re rival canning companies.”

“Oh, well that makes sense.” 

Listen, I’m not the best at superhero/villain names so cut me some slack. 

[ambitionsource]

AMBITION Season 1 ♫ “The Phantom of AAA” [ 1.02 ]

CREATED BY Esther (rapunzles) & Maggie (quincywillows)

LIFE’S NO FUN WITHOUT A GOOD SCARE – October brings terror as the techies are forced to skip an important event for the performers. Isadora works on a short film, documenting the supposed ghost haunting AAA. Riley has issues adjusting to the intensity of the school.

44 Minutes (7K words) || No warnings apply.

[ ← First Impressions (Pilot) ] [ S1 Synopsis ] [ Under Pressure → ]

( Follow along with the music on Spotify here! )

INT. RILEY’S BEDROOM - DAY

Another alarm kicks off the episode, being turned off as abruptly as it was in the pilot. RILEY MATTHEWS lays in bed, only her expression is less nervous this time and more determined. Ambitious, if you will. Without hesitation, she throws the covers and leaps out of bed.

As Riley gets ready, dancing and humming around her room, she takes a moment to stop in front of a brand new item hanging on her wall. It’s a dream / moodboard, already decorated with a couple of playbills, ticket stubs, and inspirations (Sara Bareilles, Laura Osnes, etc.) But there’s plenty of room to fill up with new memories.

The dream is out there in front of her. All she has to do is grab it. Shouldering her bag, she gives it a grin before stepping out into the hall.

INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - DAY

When Riley emerges, she finds CORY MATTHEWS sitting at the table having breakfast. Her mother is nowhere to be found, but SHAWN HUNTER is scarfing down a plate of eggs and bacon in her place. The two of them are discussing Topanga’s absence, but immediately swap topics when Riley joins the conversation.

The two of them question Riley on how she is feeling about school now. Just as she finishes fixing herself a plate and sits down to eat, Shawn receives an email notification on his phone that grabs his attention. He unlocks his phone, evidently taking great effort to read the full email.

An “oh, fuck,” is all he shares before jumping to his feet. Cory and Riley don’t even get the chance to ask what happened, Shawn out the door and heading to school. Riley gives her father a look, trying to suss out what may have just gone down.

Cory: Well, guess I’m calling in sick today.

INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY

It doesn’t take long for us to get answers. ERIC MATTHEWS is pacing in front of an exasperated JACK HUNTER, evidently up in arms about whatever it was that got Shawn so frazzled moments earlier. He wonders if Jack realizes what exactly he’s done, if he realizes he’s made a terrible, terrible mistake.

Jack goes onto to explain what exact calamity might have just occurred – there is an annual student technician conference that happens one specific weekend in October, open to sophomores and up only. It’s one of those beautiful bonding moments that binds a class together, and each class of technicians looks forward to their chance to experience it for the first time. It is a heralded techie tradition, and seem as somewhat of a right of passage.

Only one problem: this year, the event was double-booked with an important recruitment performance at the local middle schools, most notably John Quincy Adams middle school. Considering they need at least a crew of technicians with experience to help run the event, Jack had to make the executive decision to hold one class back to run it. Considering the sophomores are the group with the least credit, it only makes sense to require their attendance and mandate that they skip the conference.

Eric can smell the trouble this will cause from a mile away. He leans forward onto the desk, obviously all business.

Eric: A lot of feelings are going to be hurt if you make this decision. You do realize this, correct?

Jack: Believe it or not, Matthews, this job is not all rainbows and sunshine. Sometimes, you have to make a tough call.

Eric: I’m just saying, don’t say I didn’t warn you. This school is going to be hell this week because of it.

Jack: You say that as if this school isn’t hell every week.

Ooh, sick (semi-self) burn. Off of Eric’s evident frustration as he storms out of the office –

INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY

That chaos is already beginning to brew, LUCAS FRIAR and ISADORA DE LA CRUZ marching after Shawn down the hallway. They’ve heard the news, and they’re none too happy about it. They’ve been waiting for this conference for a year now. Isadora was planning to submit to the student film festival they do, and had been storyboarding for weeks. What gives?

Lucas: They can’t just do this.

Isadora: This is a right of passage for us. We have put up with all this crap for a year, we’re constantly doing things for the performers –

Lucas: Let alone with any thanks –

Isadora: How can we just not be going?

Lucas: This is bullshit!

Shawn: [ breaking, snapping ] Look, you think I don’t know that?

Shawn breaks his composure, whipping around to face them both. They stop talking to let him speak, but it’s clear from their expressions that they’re not going to stop being angry any time soon. Well, they’re always pissed, but especially now. Shawn tries to reel it back in, not wanting to take out his frustration on them.

Shawn: I’m trying my best. But you know how things are around here. You know which side of the school gets the favor.

Lucas, insistent: What about Dora’s film?

Shawn: [ looking at Isadora, sympathetic ] We can still send it.

But it’s not the same. They all know it’s not the same as being there. Lucas and Isadora exchange a look, evidently pissed, as the opening tones of “Thriller / Heads Will Roll” kick up…

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Thriller / Heads Will Roll” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by AAA Sophomores

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

The sophomore performers are practicing the basics of their recruitment number, a mash-up of “Thriller / Heads Will Roll” as Glee so eloquently threw together back in the day. The performance will be performed at middle schools across the district as a recruitment tool at the end of that week, so they’re hard at work to make it lively, energetic, and naturally, perfect.

The techies, on the other hand, do not share such a dedication. In fact, given the current circumstances, they’re mostly pissed as hell and don’t feel like doing much of anything correctly or helpfully. So while the number progresses normally through the first half or so, by the time we get into the middle it’s clear that the techies are beginning to disrupt the rehearsal process.

This charge is accented by Lucas completely disrupting the number, jumping in with the spoken part of the mash-up (“Darkness falls across the land / the midnight hour is close at hand…”). As he does so, the techies launch into full-on chaos, doing “important technical things” like moving set pieces, pretending to be accomplishing a very important task, but it really just means running in between the performer’s blocking, messing up choreography, knocking them over with stuff, etc.

MAYA HART desperately tries to get the number back on track (“Off with your head! Off with your head!”), but it’s no use. The techies aren’t done until they decide they are, all of them jumping off the front of the stage and scattering into the audience. The performers attempt to finish the performance, but they’re all turned around and frazzled so it’s a mess of a conclusion.

And now they’re pissed, too. FARKLE MINKUS most of all.

Farkle: I WANT THEM ALL EXPELLED!

Cue title sequence.

Riley is somewhat grateful for the disruption, as it makes her own exhaustion and confusion come off as less out of the ordinary. Maya is pointedly trying to get everybody back on track, because apparently there are higher stakes to this recruitment business than Riley realized.

Maya: Could we please get this back on track? Mr. Jacobs is going to be there Friday night and I don’t want to embarrass myself in front of him.

Farkle: [ with a choked gasp ] WHAT?

Riley: I’m sorry, I’m – who?

Zay: Mr. Jacobs. He’s a big wig on the admissions panel for Julliard. It’s never a bad idea to get on his good side and curry some favor as early as possible.

Maya: His daughters attend JQA, and there’s no way in hell I’m throwing away my shot to impress him. [ To the techies. ] So kindly, if all of you could stop ruining everything? Much appreciated. Muah.

Riley still doesn’t really get what the big deal is, but the rest of the coalition is clearly stressed so she decides she may as well be, too. She wanders off as the rest of the performers call for a break, trying to grapple with this news.

INT. AAA - FILM STUDIES CLASS - DAY

A darkened classroom, a film showing on the screen. It’s something older and spooky; Frankenstein or Dracula, maybe. DYLAN ORLANDO is conked out at his desk, drooling a little bit onto his notebook near the back of the classroom. NICK YOGI and DAVE WILLIAMS mess with him without waking him up, sticking markers together and trying to poke his ear.

Isadora is seated behind them, ignoring their antics but not paying attention to the film either. She’s dejectedly flipping through a journal, where she’s been taking notes and jotting down ideas for a film for well over a year. And now it’s a bust.

She flips to one of the earlier pages, where notes about a potential mockumentary surrounding Adams are scribbled. She sighs, glancing back up at the screen just as something monumental or scary happens. The lead actress screams bloody murder, and suddenly Isa’s eye light up with an idea. Slowly, a smile creeps onto her face.

INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY

Lucas is immediately accosted by Isa the moment he crosses paths with her, the latter shoving him out of the way and into a corner of the school. When he questions what the hell is going on, noticing the wild look in Isadora’s eyes, she barely gives him a second to catch up before declaring that she knows exactly what her film is going to be – and they’re getting their revenge.

She should’ve led with “revenge.” Lucas gestures for her to lead the way, the two of them jogging off to gather the rest of the techies.

INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY

Angela has dragged Shawn into Jack’s office to complain, fed up with the behavior of the techies and citing this instance with the recruitment rehearsal as the last straw. She remarks that the stunts they pulled were unacceptable, and demands that action be taken against them. Shawn fires back with the fact that they already had to give up something to appease her students, so he doesn’t see how they’re not already being punished. Jack attempts to mediate, but it’s evident that the bad blood between Shawn and Angela is far deeper than the party lines between their halves of the school.

Shawn: Forgive my kids for wanting their one well-deserved break from listening to you all screech every day of the week.

Angela: Your students don’t even do the assignments. They don’t perform –

Shawn: BECAUSE THAT’S NOT WHAT THEY’RE HERE TO DO!

Jack: [ rubbing his temples ] This is my living nightmare.

Jack takes Shawn’s side in this instance, pointing out that no one was harmed in the messing of the rehearsal and that the situation is not ideal for either party. Angela attempts to plead for favor in the sense that if their performance doesn’t go well, it reflects poorly on all of them. But Jack has had enough, because believe it or not there are other things he has to attend to rather than their constant beef. He dismisses them both.

INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY

Shawn and Angela continue their tirade in the hallway, griping at one another and taking a couple more personal shots. We quickly learn that this grudge between them goes back many years, back to their own college days. Yes, Shawn & Angela were once an item, and a serious one at that. But when Angela wanted to pursue her artistic dreams and jet-set off to New York they broke up, and a heartbroken Shawn sort of lost direction and went down a couple of wrong paths. Shawn is stuck in this job on the good will of his half-brother to get a fresh start, and Angela somehow ended up stuck in the same place rather than being the superstar she always swore she would be.

It’s clear that there is lingering bitterness between them because of all of that, but also… maybe, lingering feelings? It’s hard to decide when the line between love and hate is so thin. Angela makes one off-hand, dismissive comment about the way Shawn runs his crew before storming off, leaving him embittered.

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

The techies are taking advantage of the quiet in the auditorium, assembled on the stage. Isadora has the rolling whiteboard and they are jotting down ideas, she and Lucas leading the groupthink and brainstorming ideas. As Isadora explains it, they are going to make her mockumentary about the ghost of Adams.

Dylan: THERE’S A GHOST?

Isadora: No, it’s a mock – could I finish?

There is no ghost, but they’re going to convince the performers that there is – by scaring the ever living shit out of them. And how? By using the technical prowess they’ve crafted over the years that the performers never even notice or appreciate in the first place. But to do that, they need ideas. Hence, the brainstorming session.

Dave raises his hand eagerly, waiting to be called on even though no one else is jumping up to speak. Lucas exchanges a look with Isadora, before pointing and granting him the right speak.

Lucas: What say you, Dave?

Dave: Okay. Okay. [ catching his breath ] Okay. So, here’s an idea. We get a pair of crocodiles –

[ Isadora pinches the bridge of her nose. Lucas’s eyebrows raise, but he doesn’t look opposed to the suggestion. ]

Dave: I know what you’re thinking, but I know a guy. So we get the crocs –

Shawn interrupts the brainstorm, immediately able to tell that something is up. He questions them as he approaches, all of them muttering something incoherent and discordant. Lucas casually steps in front of the whiteboard, shrugging and scratching the back of his neck.

When Shawn turns to Isadora, it’s hard to lie to her favorite teacher. She confesses, explaining their full plan. She prefaces that she knows it’s not necessarily couth, but she’s so sick of getting overwritten by them and all she wanted was to make this film… but Shawn disrupts her nervous ranting by claiming that he understands. No, Shawn doesn’t want to shut down the operation; he supports it full force. Fired up from his dispute with Angela, Shawn is more than ready to help them shake things up – and after all, every student project needs a faculty sponsor.

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “This Is Halloween” as performed by The Nightmare Before Christmas Original Cast || Performed by Shawn Hunter & AAA Sophomore Techies

[ Lyrics specific to characters – follow along here! ]

As the song begins we see the techies starting to suggest more ideas with Isadora writing them on the board. As the lyrics begin, we see each person singing working on whatever piece of the pranks they are putting together. What exactly they’re setting up, we’re not sure, but there’s lots of spooktacular elements and fake blood involved…

When we come back to the last verse, the techies have assembled back on the stage. They’re putting together what operates like a staircase with apple boxes and other set pieces, and Jade is decorating Isadora in some items from the costume loft that make her seem more regal.

As we get to the entrance of “Jack” (“Our girl Smack is queen of the pumpkin patch”), Isadora descends from the top of the made up staircase and Lucas runs up to help her down the steps, essentially marching in as the brand new ruler of the auditorium. Then they continue to goof around and congregate together, before descending into ominous laughter. Oh, spooky…

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

The next day. The performers are hard at work rehearsing dance moves again, ZAY BABINEAUX leading the lesson. Riley is doing her best to keep up, but it’s obvious she’s just rustier than everyone else. She bumps into SARAH CARLSON, earning a glare from her.

The rehearsal is somewhat thrown off by the presence of Isadora, who is now filming everything with her camera. She’s weaving throughout the performance, getting things on footage, collecting “B-roll” for her documentary. She is concentrated and hard at work, but the performers have no idea what she’s actually supposed to be filming.

Farkle is the first to vocally object, complaining that she shouldn’t be filming them when they’re not at their most polished. It’s not going to help their performance. Isadora snaps at him not to flatter himself, and explains that the film isn’t about them but the ghost of Adams. She’s attempting to create a documentary about the ghoul and how it continues to haunt campus to this day. When all the performers are like A GHOST??? Isadora is like, oh, you hadn’t heard?

Still, not everybody is convinced.

Farkle: There is no such thing as ghosts. [ Launches into big, long, scientific explanation. ]

As Farkle is ranting, Lucas saunters up behind him and spooks him. He yelps and nearly knocks his teeth out, Lucas ducking out of the way just in time and laughing. It’s not an encouraging laugh. If they thought the ghost was scary…

CHARLIE GARDNER, on the other hand, has a different approach.

Charlie: Farkle is loud, but right. If ghosts were real, my devout Catholic grandmother would still be tucking in my shirts and telling me I’m going to hell for missing mass on Sundays for rehearsals.

Dylan: I’m going to hell too, but that’s not why.

Asher & Dave: [ Laughing and high-fiving behind Dylan. ]

Isadora continues to film as the students divulge in the discourse, more invested and less aloof than they would want you to believe.

Maya: Don’t Christians believe in demons, though?

Charlie: They’re not really the same thing, but –

Yindra: My grandparents used to talk about ghosts all the time and how we had to pray them away.

Maya: See! Ghosts are totally a Christian thing.

Farkle: Ghosts. Aren’t. Anything! They don’t exist!

Yogi: Tell that to the elderly man who lives in my apartment and moves our furniture around when we’re not there.

Charlie: [ concerned ] Are you… are you sure that’s not just some homeless squatter?

Angela brings an end to the chaos, frantically trying to get their rehearsal back on track.

Angela: OKAY, THAT IS ENOUGH. WE HAVE THREE DAYS, PEOPLE.

Shawn: Unless the ghost gets you first.

Angela: Do not encourage this!

INT. AAA - ERIC’S OFFICE - DAY

Riley opts to have lunch with Eric, the two of them chatting about how she’s adjusting. She does admit that she’s surprised by how intense it is, but she skates over how hard it is to keep up and feeling chronically behind. Instead, she gets Eric to talk about the whole techie conference debacle and why there seems to be such a vitriolic divide between the two sides of the school.

Eric attributes some of it to Shawn and Angela and their history, discussing how that certainly encourages and reinforces the negativity. But some of it, he concedes, is simply circumstance. Everyone is coming from their own experience and perspective, and often forget to remember that others may not share that point of view. Naturally, this is going to create clashes…

INT. FOSTER HOME - ISADORA’S ROOM - DAY

As if to speak right to this, Isadora is certainly coming from different circumstances than her peers. We quickly get the sense that she is in a foster home situation, she and Lucas crammed into the room she shares with another girl and attempting to get work done on their schematics for the techie scheme. Other children shrieking and chattering can be heard on the other side of the door, evidently irritating Isadora even though the door is closed.

Disrupting their focus, CATHERINA GONZALEZ (15), Isadora’s roommate, enters. She is cheerful, full of enthusiasm and thirst for life – a sharp contrast from Isa and her grumpy best friend. She rambles on to Isadora about her day and her plans for the rest of the evening, while Isa hums occasionally and mostly ignores her and Lucas watches the exchange silently with amusement. It’s evident that Catherina doesn’t catch onto how disinterested Isadora is at all.

The moment Catherina disappears, Lucas opens his mouth to comment when the foster mother steps in instead, interrupting them once again. This is KAREN VAN HERSCHING (40s), type-A, driven, and devoted mother – but not exactly on the same wavelength as Isadora and doesn’t put in as much effort as she should to meet her at her level. It’s clear from the way she greets Lucas that she is… uncertain about him, which is to say lowkey terrified he’s going to do something like steal her jewelry or vandalize her perfect off-white walls.

After a brief exchange and Karen checking if they need anything like a good hostess, she leaves them alone. Lucas waits to see if any more interruptions are imminent before speaking. He tries to ask Isadora about how this foster family is shaping out, indicating it’s not the first one she has been with but perhaps the one that has lasted the longest.

But Isadora doesn’t want to talk about it. Lucas points out that, hey, at least this woman seems to be putting in a modicum of effort. Isadora ignores the comment, redirecting his attention to the task at hand and making it clear that such topics are not being discussed this afternoon.

INT. MINKUS HOME - DINING ROOM - NIGHT

In sharp contrast to Isadora’s crowded foster home, the Minkus home is lavish, spacious, and more than able to accommodate Farkle and his many siblings. At present, four of them are seated at the dinner table with STUART MINKUS (late 30s) and JENNIFER MINKUS (40s) – Farkle, LILA MINKUS (18), URI MINKUS (12), and EZRA MINKUS (7).

Farkle is smack in the middle of this family with two other older brothers off at college already, and while it’s more than evident that it’s a loving clan there’s just not enough attention to go around most days. Jennifer is distracted with Ezra, and Stuart is attempting to get Uri engaged in conversation about his school day.

During the conversation, Farkle consistently attempts to gain control of the dinner topic, finally just blurting out whether or not they all believe in ghosts. This captures their attention certainly, all of them laughing it off or scoffing. Farkle, please! Why would he even ask such a silly thing…

Farkle: No, yeah, yeah, of course. I know. I know, obviously. I just… yeah. I know.

Ezra: Wait, why are we talking about ghosts? Are they real?

Jennifer: Of course not, dear, Farkle is just being silly. Aren’t you, darling?

Farkle, flatly: Oh, that’s me. I’m as silly as they come.

Somehow, the conversation shifts gears until Farkle is forgotten again. He accidentally knocks over a water glass and makes a mess, causing both the parents to get up and run to get stuff to clean it up. Lila, clearly harboring a somewhat contentious relationship with her closest in age sibling, rolls her eyes disdainfully.

Lila: Why are you such a disease?

Farkle: [ chews pointedly and obnoxiously in her direction ]

Once the dust from his accident has settled, Farkle tentatively mentions the upcoming performance at JQA and asks if his parents and siblings will be able to make it to any of the middle school recruitment performances. Especially given the special guest of Mr. Jacobs… Stuart fondly recalls the business dealings he’s had with Jacobs, but doesn’t confirm or deny his presence at the performance.

When Farkle pushes further, all of them express pity and point out x commitment and y reason that they can’t make it. But they’re sure he’ll do great! Farkle brushes it off, acting as though it doesn’t bother him. But he’s pretty quiet at dinner after that.

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

As the week progresses, a series of odd and unusual “hauntings” begin to happen at the school, prompting discussion amongst the students. A couple of them even mention how a couple videos have been featured on their rogue instagram page, AAA Confessions.

We haven’t seen the terrors hit the performers full force until rehearsal one afternoon, in which CHAI FRESCO (15) is practicing the opening operatic tones of “Think of Me.”

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Think Of Me” as performed by Phantom of the Opera Original Cast || Performed by Chai Fresco (feat. AAA Sophomores) || First 40 seconds

While Chai is rehearsing, a set piece seems to mysteriously fall apart and come crashing down – seconds from where Farkle is pacing and running choreography. Maya pulls him out of the way just in time, obviously stunned by how close it came to falling on top of him.

To be clear, the set piece is just thin wood and probably weighs less than five pounds. It wouldn’t have done much damage to anyone, but the sound it makes as it hits the stage floor startles all of them. The moment is clearly an homage to Phantom, prompting screams and an assemblage of the performers to launch into “HE’S HEREEE, THE PHANTOM OF AAA!” Farkle is like okay can you all shut it?

This isn’t the first happening they’ve experienced that week, however, and people are starting to change their tune. As Angela calls for a break and Shawn instructs Dave and Dylan to go and fix the broken set piece, Maya makes a dash for the dressing room. Riley watches her go, contemplative.

INT. AAA - GIRLS DRESSING ROOM - DAY

Maya is attempting to shake off the nerves from the spook, whispering to herself and taking deep breaths. Riley follows her in, hanging back for a moment before Maya spots her in the mirror. Embarrassed, Maya snaps at her for what she wants.

Riley tries to put her best foot forward, offering a helping hand and claiming she has some techniques she uses to calm down if Maya wants them. There’s a moment where it seems like they may come together, but Maya has been independent for a long time and doesn’t plan to let her walls down any time soon – let alone to a nobody like Riley.

She redirects instead, pointing out how she doesn’t see how Riley could possibly be of any help to her when she can’t even keep up with the rigor of the curriculum. Ouchie! Riley takes the blow, nodding and backing off. The moment she’s gone, Maya lets out a long exhale, hiding her head in her hands.

INT. AAA - BOYS DRESSING ROOM - DAY

The discussion over Farkle’s near “brush with death” continues in the dressing room. Although it seems like Charlie and the others are starting to wonder whether the ghost may be real, Farkle maintains his skepticism almost like an act of defiance. But he’s a bit too crazed over it to be wholly convincing.

Zay has his own doubts, and he expresses as such before gearing up to head out. He’s off to do a little investigating of his own.

INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY

Riley is en route to lunch when Charlie catches up to her, offering to join her for lunch since she’s still trying to figure out her place. We still can’t tell if he’s genuinely a nice person or if he’s trying to get with Riley, but she does humor the conversation long enough to get something further out of the conversation.

The two of them stop in the hallway just by the library, the cafeteria doors down the hall. Charlie stuffs his hands in his pockets and leans against the wall, launching into a lament about how it is a shame that this ghost stuff seems to be cropping up at the same time as the recruitment performances. Riley probes further.

Riley: Why is it such a big deal? [ hesitating, then batting her eyelashes ] You know, if you can tell me.

Charlie: I don’t really think it’s so much a secret as people not wanting to come off too vulnerable. But these kind of showcases, they’re really important to a lot of people in class. You know, everyone is trying to prove they’ve got what it takes.

Riley: Farkle.

Charlie: Farkle, sure, but the rest of them too. Maybe not for the same reasons, but you know what they say. Everybody’s got something to hide. [ Glancing at Riley, looking her over. ] You know what I mean?

Riley, uncertain: Right. Sure.

Charlie rounds out the conversation by pointing out the very true fact that most of the odd happenings have occurred in the auditorium. He just wishes it would cease and desist so they could get some practicing done. If someone could exorcise whatever demon is haunting them, they’d sure be a hero. The wheels in Riley’s head are turning…

When Charlie asks if she’s ready to go eat, Riley pretends to have forgotten something in the auditorium, saying she’ll meet him later. He waves and heads off, Riley ducking back towards the auditorium. If the sophomore class needs a hero, then she’s willing to step up to the plate.

INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY

Riley continues her journey to the auditorium, making sure to duck out of the way and sidestep as people pass her to head towards lunch. She ducks into an open doorway and watches as Isadora passes with Asher, Dylan, and Jeff tailing behind her, confirming that the techies have vacated the auditorium.

Making it to the doorway to the dressing room hall, she ducks into the doors and disappears.

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

Poking around the darkened theater, behind the scenes, the auditorium seems much more sinister than it does during class. It’s almost humorous, the way the technical aspects of the room – set pieces, costume loft, prop loft – seem to loom over her and intimidate her as if they’re straight out of hell.

Spooky music accompanies her as she makes her way around, wandering where she shouldn’t and searching for any sort of clue as to what may be causing all of the strange happenings. She continues to hit dead-ends, until she changes her track and heads towards the world beyond the stage: the audience, the aisles, and the technician’s booth looming so far away from them all.

In fact, the technician’s booth seems like a worthy thing to investigate. It’s so mysterious and removed, and if anything would hold answers that would be it. Riley glances over her shoulder, jogging towards the back row of seating and the stairs that lead up to the technician’s booth. She hesitates, hand hovering over the handrail, before taking the plunge.

She takes the steps two at a time, slowing the closer she gets to that hulking black door. It’s unassuming yet insurmountable, and Riley grows more apprehensive the closer she gets. The door handle is right in front of her, waiting… the music quiets as she reaches a hand out… inches away from the other side of their world…

Lucas, from below: HEY!

DUN DUN DUN! Lucas’s shout acts as a jump scare both to us and Riley, causing her to startle and whip around. Lucas is glaring at her from the bottom of the stairs, as unfriendly and unsettling as usual. Talk about truly terrifying.

Lucas: [ tilting his head ] You’re not supposed to be in here.

Riley: Oh, yeah. Yes. Well, I was just… see, I was only…

Riley has no excuses and no probable explanation for her presence. At least, none that Lucas would take or appreciate, she’s sure. As she struggles to find an excuse, Lucas begins making his way up the stairs in her direction. Each step of his big black boots is like an impending sense of danger, and Riley would run if her brain would start working again. But it’s completely shut down, unable to form a coherent thought, plausible excuse, or get her feet moving so she can escape and live to see another day.

Lucas comes to a stop on the step below where she’s standing, allowing them to stand at approximately the same height. Riley trails off with her stammers, pressing her lips together nervously and avoiding his gaze. Lucas simply examines her, getting a good look at her. Riley has to wonder if this is the end for her – he does have a switchblade, after all.

Instead, Lucas waits for her to glance at him and meet his eyes. Then, a simple message:

Lucas: Mind your own business.

Then he leaves her alone, continuing his trek up the stairs and disappearing into the technician’s booth. The door slams, causing Riley to jump again. She takes a moment to catch her breath, closing her eyes and trying not to like, pass out. Then she makes a beeline out of there.

INT. AAA - CLASSROOM - DAY

Zay, on the other hand, is conducting analysis of his own. As he works in math class, he notices Jade and Dave continuously tossing glances in his direction when they think he isn’t looking.

Thoughtful, Zay waits until the rest of the class has left when the bell rings before approaching the two of them. He questions if they’ve also noticed the strange behavior supposedly attributed to the ghost. Jade acts nonchalant, but Dave stumbles a bit which Zay catches onto. Jade excuses them both, but Zay has gotten the lead he needs. Something else is up, and he’s not going to let it drop so easily.

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Somebody’s Watching Me” as performed by Rockwell || Performed by Zay Babineaux

As Zay continues his way through the halls and throughout the school day, he takes note of all the moments where the techies are acting weird or seem to be just behind him or in his line of sight. It’s evident to him that they’re behind whatever is going on, he just needs some proof.

He gets his proof as he turns the games on them and starts trailing each of the techies, trying to see if he can catch any of them doing something suspicious.

INT. AAA - COMPUTER LAB - DAY

His search comes to an end as he corners Isadora in the computer lab, working on a cut of her documentary. She dodges his interrogations at first, but the more he pushes the more easy she is to crack. She admits that they’re behind the whole thing, but begs him not to blow the ruse until she can get all the footage she needs.

Zay passes her to take a look at the footage, watching with amusement as Farkle and Maya freak out on camera. He thinks for a moment, before declaring he’s not going to rat her out. On the contrary – he wants in on the joke.  

He may just be the key they need to convince Farkle, considering he would never believe another performer would be in on the ruse. And Zay has known him for two years now, he’s observed enough about Farkle’s psyche to know how to crack him. Forging a temporary truce, Zay and Isadora shake on it.

INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY

Using Zay as their inside man, the techies pull off their final prank on that Friday, the same day that the recruitment performances kick off. They haven’t gotten much rehearsing done all week, and this day is no exception despite how frantically Maya tries to get them all to pull it together.

As the mirage unfolds and they essentially pretend to (convincingly) kill Zay after he is kidnapped by the ghost, Farkle cracks and totally freaks out. The prank falls apart after Zay breaks character, and the techies all burst into laughter now that Isadora has gotten all the footage she needs. The performers realize what has happened and that they’ve been messed with, and they are none too happy.

Maya: What, do you think you all are so smart? You think you’ve done something really great?

Isadora: Well, no, not yet. Still needs to be edited, but –

Maya is pissed, and the rest of the performers share that energy. When Zay tells her to calm down and that it’s not that deep, she retorts that it is, because they’ve wasted an entire week and now they’re going to embarrass themselves in front of a bunch of middle schoolers and people whose opinions actually matter. The techies fire back that they had to give up something already, so perhaps this can even the slate.

It’s clear that the divides that exist between the school are running even deeper than ever. Riley watches it all unfold, not quite feeling a part of any of it. Somehow isolated even in a situation where her placement should be effortless and easy. Maya storms out first, leaving tensions high.

INT. AAA - BLACK BOX THEATER - DAY

Angela and Shawn are at it again, having a sparring match over what unfolded in class that afternoon. They’ve convened in the actual performing classroom, the black box, and it’s more claustrophobic than the halls. As they argue, their words seem to echo off the walls.

Shawn claims that the students just got what was coming to them. Angela scoffs, commenting that Shawn is just as childish as them and as he was the day she left him. This is a deep cut, and Shawn doesn’t have much to say in response. She states that it’s time both of them grew up – that he stops spreading his petty energy and tantrum throwing to the students, and that she stops holding out the foolish hope that he’ll change.

Shawn wants to get another word in, to stand up for himself, but Angela claims she doesn’t have the time. She has a class to lead in a performance that’s going to be tough for all of them, considering his students fucked it all up. Shawn is left behind, seething. He knocks over some papers from the desk, running his hands through his hair.

INT. RILEY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Riley practices along in her bedroom, dressed for the recruitment performance but with her mind elsewhere. She sits in her bay window and strums her ukulele.

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Creep” as performed by Jahzel || Performed by Riley Matthews

Riley sings this stripped down version of “Creep” by herself, demonstrating her talent when its just presented and allowed to simply be. It reflects the frustrations she’s having fitting in with her classmates, and feeling as though she doesn’t quite belong (“What the hell am I doing here / I don’t belong here”).

When she finishes, Cory pokes his head in and asks if she’s ready to go. She hesitates, then nods, dropping her ukulele on the window seat and getting to her feet.

INT. JOHN QUINCY ADAMS - BACKSTAGE - NIGHT

The performers have assembled, Angela leading the charge. She leads them through warm-ups, before confirming if they have the same sense she does that their number they’ve been half-assing all week just isn’t going to cut it. They all agree, they haven’t practiced it enough.

Angela claims they should go on loose, then, and perform something fun that they all know. That’s what this is all about, isn’t it? Doing it because it’s fun and because you love it. When she asks for suggestions, instantly Maya, Farkle, and Zay all shout “TIME WARP,” because it’s the quintessential Halloween theater kid song from a quintessential theater kid movie.

INT. JOHN QUINCY ADAMS - AUDITORIUM - NIGHT

The techies are all in their positions, begrudgingly so. Lucas and Isadora are hanging out in the booth waiting for the performance to start when Shawn darts in, late again but seemingly on a mission. He pulls the two of them aside, telling them to go to the festival.

Shawn: Did you finish the film?

Isadora: Yes, I submitted it an hour ago. Why?

Shawn: Good. Then you’ll want to get going if you want to get there in time.

Lucas: What?

Shawn: Go. Both of you, get going and go represent triple A. If you leave now before this starts, you can still make it. [ to the others ] Dylan! You can cover the board?

Dylan: Aye, aye, captain!

Lucas and Isadora are totally stunned, questioning if that’s allowed and whether it’ll cause more trouble and a myriad of other questions. Shawn shrugs them all off, getting both of their attention and looking them in the eyes. The words he speaks next are impassioned, coming from his own experience, and also act as a lesson for a good portion of the series.

Shawn: Look, sometimes, you can’t let the man tell you what to do or how to be. If something is important, if it matters, you go out and you do it anyway. Only you can decide who you are and what matters. You stand up for yourself. Do you hear me?

Lucas and Isadora nod, getting the message loud and clear. Shawn gives Lucas a pat on the shoulder before pushing them towards the doors. They peel out just as the opening tones of “Time Warp” fill the auditorium…

Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Time Warp” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by AAA Sophomore Performers

The performers take to the stage, doing a fun, loose, and kooky rendition of the classic Halloween dance number. They all actually look like they’re having fun, and the middle schoolers are clearly having fun too. In the back of the theater, the mysterious Mr. Jacobs watches with an intrigued eye.

Lucas and Isadora sprint into the parking lot, making it to the car Isadora is allowed to use. Lucas hops in the driver’s seat, the two of them backing out of the parking lot and exchanging a grin before heading on the way to the conference.

As it stands, there’s no way this performer / techie divide is going away any time soon. Neither is the tension between individuals. But for now, for a moment, they can share in the one thing that brings them all together and brings them joy – the rush of a successful production.

END OF EPISODE.

[just-kept-running]

Time Lord Culture, Language, and Gender

//So I got bored and this is what happened.  Pronouns are a pretty big thing in my life.  I’m non-binary and I use they/them or xe/xir pronouns.  It’s been an uphill battle to get to a point where I’m comfortable with my appearance and even more of one to get people to use the correct pronouns for me.  Even people who mean well.  I’m an anthropology grad student.  I’m in a department full of anthropologists - and when I’m not there, I’m with a whole bunch of ethnomusicologists, who are basically musical anthropologists.  And the very first thing you learn in anthropology is to let go of the rigid boxes society has taught you everything must fit into.  So these are pretty open-minded people.  And it’s still a lot of reminding people and a lot of explaining what non-binary means and how singular they works.

So because I am both non-binary, fascinated by linguistics, and an utter nerd, I got to thinking.  What must Gallifreyan pronouns be like?  And I put this long, rambling thought under a cut so I don’t take up your entire dash.

So you know how the TARDIS translates everything?  And, I mean, supposedly it doesn’t translate Gallifreyan, but hey, you kind of have to assume the Doctor does not actually speak every language ever and at least part of the time he’s probably speaking Gallifreyan.  I cannot see it being otherwise.  I mean, what good is the translation circuit if it doesn’t translate what the Time Lord piloting the TARDIS is saying?  But I digress.

Anyway, I was thinking about this, because I am prone to doing things like that, and I wondered, you know, how do pronouns in Gallifreyan work?  Hear me out on this, though.  So in English, the language of the show, pronouns are relatively gendered.  In English, in terms of pronouns that refer to people, you have he, she, and they.  Now, all of those can actually be singular (and if you want to fight me on this point, you’ll also have to take that up with Merriam-Webster, so have fun with that) but we usually only use he or she if the subject is known.  When talking about an unknown subject, we tend to use they, because we don’t know the subject’s gender.  But there’s an (incorrect) assumption that if the subject is known, then we do know their gender and that they must be either a he or a she.

Not all languages are like this.  Spanish, for instance, is actually more gendered than English.  Pronouns for people in Spanish are el, la, las, and los.  I did include plurals for a reason.  El is he, la is she, las is plural she, los is plural he or just straight plural.  There is no neutral option.  Indefinite subjects like “the secretary” or “the engineer” tend to be gendered based on culturally defined gender roles.  Additionally, there is no truly neutral pronoun like the English they.  The catch-all plural is masculine and there is no neutral singular.  But that’s not all that changes.  Most nouns and adjectives have both masculine and feminine forms.  So you end up changing a lot of things based on the subject’s gender.

I do know there exist languages in which gendered pronouns and word endings really aren’t a thing, but I can’t think of them off the top of my head.  But I do have to wonder, would that not be what Gallifreyan is like?  I mean, as Twelve helpfully points out, “We’re billions of years beyond your petty obsession with gender and its associated stereotypes.”

Time Lords (and I do have to wonder if the Lords and Ladies part of that isn’t also English rather than Gallifreyan) can regenerate as any sex.  As such, their gender is a little bit more complex to suss out than a human’s - and we humans are pretty damn complicated.  But basically, it seems to me that all Time Lords are, by human standards, non-binary.  Now, there are ways that they can control their regenerations, so it is possible that they could choose to always be male or always be female, if that’s what felt more right to them.  But it would seem that they just don’t adhere to the same ideas of gender as humans.

Language is a reflection of the culture it comes from.  It’s sort of circular, actually.  Language is a product of its culture, but the culture is heavily impacted by the language it uses.  This is why people get so up in arms about terminology.  Pronouns, for instance.  The English-speaking non-binary community has made a big push for singular they to be more widely accepted as a personal pronoun because it grants us greater visibility and the way people speak is both indicative of and also shapes their world-view.  So if you have a word for a person who is neither a man nor a woman, you’re more likely to accept that such people exist and are valid in their identities.

So Gallifreyan.  Because gender as per human definitions doesn’t seem to be a thing among Time Lords (although not Gallifreyans as a whole if one wants to include groups like the Sisterhood of Karn), it stands to reason that the language would reflect that.  Oddly, I can think of one instance right off that doesn’t support this.  In the episode “Hell Bent,” the Doctor shoots a Gallifreyan general, forcing the general to regenerate.  This prompts a response from one of their subordinates of, “Are you all right, sir? Oh, er, sorry, ma'am.”  The general then remarks, “Oh, back to normal, am I?” 

On the one hand, if the Gallifreyan language does not have different words based on gender, then there would be no reason for the subordinate to correct himself.  On the other hand, the general doesn’t even seem to notice what sex they have ended up as, although they do go on to comment that the last regeneration was the only time they were ever in a man’s body.  Additionally, Missy changes her name after regenerating into a female body and corrects a Dalek who calls her a Time Lord with the now widely known quip, “Time Lady, thank you.  Some of us can afford the upgrade.”

All of that seems to contradict the Doctor’s assertion that Time Lords are billions of years beyond humans’ petty obsession with gender, as he puts it.  And that’s before we even get into the Master’s snide comment about “Is the future going to be all girl?”  I don’t feel like diving down that particular rabbit hole, though, so we’ll just stick to language.  It does seem overwhelmingly clear that Time Lords are, to some extent, aware of gender roles.  But this seems like it would be a distinctly human thing, and most Time Lords frankly haven’t had much contact with humanity.  Probably the most well known human among Time Lords would be Leela, if I had to guess, because she wound up married to a Time Lord and lived on Gallifrey until her death.  Most Time Lords just aren’t terribly concerned with humanity.  The Doctor, the Master, Susan, and Romana seem to be the exceptions, not the norm.

So I think, honestly, that the amount of attention paid by Time Lords to gender is probably less to do with Gallifrey and more to do with the UK.  Because the people behind the show are not Gallifreyan, they are British.  They are not aliens from a distant and advanced civilization of long-lived shape-shifters, they are humans from 20th and 21st century Earth.  They come from a country whose language, government, and society have all been historically very focused on gender.  And that is very obvious in the show.  If you start with “An Unearthly Child” and work your way forward from there, you can see the shifts in culturally ascribed gender roles.  It’s a very long running series, and a lot has changed in 54 years.

Another reason this whole dissonance between language and function doesn’t make sense to me is that historically, at least in Western society, a lot of culturally ascribed gender roles had to do with the idea of women as mothers and men as providers.  Women were supposed to be nurturing and emotional, while men were supposed to be strong and steadfast.  And while we know at this point that this is bullshit, it has shaped a lot of our culture.  However, that wouldn’t be the case on Gallifrey.  Time Lords are sterile, or were at one point, due to a curse placed on them by the Sisterhood of Karn after the Sisterhood was driven out of Gallifrey.  This is why the Great Houses and the looms exist.  There is also a taboo on pregnancy.  In fact, it’s illegal (or was at one time).  I mentioned Leela earlier, and she’s pertinent here again, because the main reason this even comes up is that that restriction was eased for her and her husband because she was not a Time Lord, she was human.  And even if that weren’t the case, the fact that they can change sexes from one regeneration to the next makes such rigid roles extremely impractical from a societal standpoint.  There would be simply no good way to work that.

But Time Lord society does seem to be, at least for the most part, egalitarian.  It appears to be an attempt at an egalitarian society as written by people who come from a society that is strongly patriarchal.  There are a handful of truly egalitarian societies in the world, and it would be very interesting to see what Gallifreyan society would look like written by an author from one of those cultures.  (Not that it’s likely that will ever happen, given they’re all very tiny and mostly very remote.  Not to mention some of them have begun to be influenced by Westernization.)  I would suppose you would get a very different view on what the language and culture would look like.

But back to the topic of language, because that was where I started with this whole thing.  It really does make me wonder exactly how the Gallifreyan language works.  I can only imagine that the use of gendered terminology for and by Time Lords has more to do with the English of the show and less to do with the Gallifreyan of their origins.  It would really be an interesting thing to expand upon further.

[oneshot-twoshot-redshot-blueshot]

Chuck Sees All, part 2

Requested

Part 1

*Chuck-centric

______________________________________________________________

Chuck tried his best to be normal, to not give any indication that he’d seen your dream. You didn’t seem to be acting any differently. You still greeted him with a smile, still treated him with pleasantries.

But Chuck couldn’t help but wonder if Gabriel had been right. Should he do something? After all, you were the one dreaming it… surely it was a sign, right?

“Coward.”

Chuck closed his eyes. “Gabriel, not now.”

“That’s the point. You’re not doing anything. You’re not seizing the moment. You’re not doing the thing both of you want.”

“We don’t know she really wants that.”

“Bullshit. You know it and I know it and she knows it.”

Chuck shifted uncomfortably. Sometimes he hated how right Gabriel was. He had always been the most sharp-nosed of his children, able to suss out any secret. He was only ever matched by Lucifer. Chuck was thankful he wasn’t around at the moment.

“Look,” Gabriel said. “You don’t have to immediately jump into the sack with her. In fact, I’m sure she’s not that kind of girl. She would much rather go on a few dates first.”

“So?”

“So go ask her on a date! Take her to dinner. Take her to a movie. Take her to stargaze and tell her the answers to all the mysteries of the world.”

Chuck had to admit, those all sounded like things you would enjoy.

“Then you can bone, just like her dream.”

Chuck sighed. “Gabriel, you were doing so well. Why did you have to cross that line?”

“Because you won’t.”

______________________________________________________________

A few days later, Chuck found you alone in the kitchen. You were putting away groceries, having found a use for your spare time: cooking decent meals for the Winchesters.

“Y/N?”

You looked up, your face automatically lighting up. “Hi, Chuck.”

“Listen… I was wondering…”

You cocked your head to the side, patiently waiting.

Chuck took a deep breath. “I was wondering if you would maybe want to go get dinner sometime…”

You studied him for a long time, each passing second making Chuck regret having asked. “You don’t really seem like the type who likes going out,” you said quietly.

Chuck’s heart sank. How could he have been so stupid to think that you would want to go on a date with him? How could he have listened to Gabriel?

“But… we could stay in and make dinner? Together?”

“What?”

You shrugged. “It… could be fun?”

Chuck smiled at you, his heart fluttering ever so slightly. “I’d love to.”

And so, the two of you set about making a lovely meal, the kitchen smelling more mouth-watering with every passing minute. You taught Chuck certain techniques, gently correcting him when he held the knife incorrectly.

When the meal was finally prepared, you made a couple plates and put them in the fridge for the boys. Then you made two more plates, handing one to Chuck.

“Shall we?”

Chuck nodded, following you into the library. The two of you sat at the table and with a wave of his hand, Chuck made two candles appear, the rest of the lights dimming. The flickering candlelight accented your facial features, including the small smile.

The meal was delicious, the conversation wonderful. The two of you spent hours talking, laughing, watching the candles slowly diminish.

You finally heard the garage door opening, signaling the return of the Winchesters. “I suppose I should clean up our mess,” you said, standing.

“Let me help,” Chuck said. With a wave of his hand, the dishes were cleared. “There. All clean and put away.”

“So helpful,” you said with a chuckle.

“Listen, Y/N,” Chuck said. “Could we… do this again sometime?”

“Of course, Chuck. I’d really like that.”

Chuck smiled. “Maybe next time we can eat outside… under the stars?”

“I’d love to stargaze with you.”

______________________________________________________________

And just like that, you and Chuck were inseparable. You did all the things normal ‘couples’ did: movie nights, game nights, stargazing, cooking, cuddling. And Chuck proved you wrong by taking you out occasionally, the two of you dressed in your finest.

Sometimes, Chuck doubted that you were really in love with him. He desperately loved you and wanted to make sure you reciprocated those feelings. And so, as wrong as it may be, sometimes Chuck peered into your mind.

His fears were never found to be correct. Your thoughts were tinged with pink, giving Chuck a warm, fuzzy feeling. You loved him.

You loved him.

You loved him.

And if he ever doubted that what he saw, what he felt was wrong, you proved it true the night you asked him to stay with you, in your room.

“Please?” you asked, your eyes wide with longing.

Chuck said nothing, simply picked you up and took you to your bed, the two of you tumbling onto the sheets. Chuck watched you slip under the covers, tossing your clothes aside.

“Chuck?” you asked, wondering why he was still seated at the end of the bed.

“Are you sure you want this?”

“What? Of course. Why wouldn’t I?” You frowned slightly. “Wait. Do you think you to have to do this to make me happy? Because if you’re not… I mean, if you can’t because you’re God or something…”

“No, no, no,” Chuck insisted, sliding toward you, cupping your face in his. “I just…” His eyes dropped to your lips before darting back to your eyes. “If I do this… I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to let you go.”

You leaned ever so slightly forward, so your lips were almost brushing Chuck’s. “I never want you to let me go.”