#anyway WHATEVER I’M HAPPY ABT IT
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I GOT TICKETS FOR PAUL IN PARIS
#unfollow me now I’m only gonna talk about Paul in Paris and Neil Newbon in Milan for the next 50 years#paul mccartney#YOOOOOOOOOO#and the ticket price is INSANELY LOW given the average prices these days#i literally do not understand why every other date is 500 euros for ticket#but the spots standing in Paris are 80 euros?#anyway WHATEVER I’M HAPPY ABT IT#wish it was in London but eh#MIGHT SQUEEZE A VISIT AT DISNEYLAND TOO TBH#OHHHH THIS DECEMBER GON BE FIREEEEEEEE#I’M COMING YOU BEAUTIFUL BASTARD I LOVE YOU#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#macca
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I feel like there’s hands trapped in my chest clawing to get out but that’s okay! We stay silly!
#sorry to scream but I have got to just yell for a minute#idk what the hell happened to me but it started a few months ago#every time I’m alone with my thoughts it’s just there. something and it’s itchy!!! metaphorically yknow but#my soul is itchy babes this is concerning#not very concerning I’m pretty certain it has to do with me finally realizing oh maybe I ain’t cis#but I DONT FUCKIN LIKE IT#I know what’s gonna happen. whatever this is it’s gonna gnaw at me for a couple years and then it’ll just hit me like a truck and I’ll be#Changed for the better or worse#same thing happened when I wrestled with the sexuality but it’s so stupid#body stop it. chest stop it. hands!!!! stop scratching and trying to crack me chest open please#I’d like to deal with this Not Right Now I have other real issues that are more pressing#wish I could just open my chest up and grab the lil fucker that’s in there causing a ruckus and squeeze him until his head pops#anyways sorry this is stupid and very venty from me in a way I don’t usually do it#btw I do want to stress I am generally doing great overall! just tired (always haha)#but workouts have been awesome and I’m happy with my progress and I’m workin and doin well#but this has just been driving me crazy lately#lynx talks#sorryyyyy abt all that#anyway
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the funniest thing I’ve learned in the last month or so is that not a single ice hockey player is attractive. like. genuinely. 36.7k fan fictions on ao3 abt ugly men fucking.
#is this a diversity win?#no but legit it’s crazy#real 6ebe.tumblr.com fans know I’m obsessed with sports r/pf like. as a sociological phenomenon#sadly after finishing up my ethnographies of r/ugby fo:otball and f/1 I had to finally stop ignoring the elephant in the room#I even watched a game bc I’m a European insomniac and h/ockey is always on at like 1am#anyway. safe to say I rly don’t get it but happy for them or whatever#<- actually not even I have many thoughts abt the state of that community tbf#the bizarre homonormativuty and inserting gender roles into queer relationships (the percentage of a/b/o and STRONGENT d*m/s*b dynamics in#fic is CRAZY) also the writers are all so painfully North American millennials with no awareness of anything outside the us#like a lot of the most popular fic characters are Europeans and these American writers do NOT have the range 🤣 nor do they even try tbf !#anyway. no one wants to hesr all this it just kills me how unfuckable every single one of those men is#like Leon? genuinely not even a 6/10 in Germany. but people keep saying he’s ‘top 5 hottest players in the league’ GIRLIES FREE URSELVES 😭😭😭#like you genuinely see attractive people fairly often watcving like fo0tbl games and r/ugby#did discuss with a friend that maybe the lack of helmets in the bigger sports outside North America means more pressure on the players to#have procedures and invest more in grooming etc but honestly idk. baffles me
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i had a dnd session right after watching it so i’m only now thinking abt the most recent king ohger episode and just. it’s about the siblings. it is so about the siblings. like specifically the foils between suzume + gira towards their older brothers and how they take after them…
like. suzume being just as cunning and sly as kaguragi is, a trait she most likely picked up from him and puts her own spin on it—getting the chance to torment her brother in the process as any good little sister should do. and gira confronting racules with his own words of how to care for a kingdom and for his people, something that even after losing his memories of his older brother has stuck with him.
just. the comparison of these two taking traits from their older brothers from back when they deeply looked up to them—suzume continuing kaguragi’s schemes alongside him and gira holding on to racules’ more virtuous ideals even after he has abandoned them for tyranny.
#i dunno if this makes any sense but it makes me feel so so normal !!#there’s also smth abt like. kaguragi and suzume being physically separated but still with each other and working together#vs racules and gira Not bc . i think the implication is racules is behind whatever happened that made gira lose his memories/not be a prince#at least that’s what i assumed. anyways that + the fact that kaguragi+suzume are getting a happy ending vs racules+gira Not#also . idk how to properly incorporate this but gira’s evil laugh being exactly like racules’… i’m so normal abt tragic siblings yall#super sentai#kingohger#king ohger spoilers#kingohger spoilers#starspeak#oh my god i Just caught that my phone autocorrected suzume to suzanne. glad i noticed before posting LMAO
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A while ago I made my best interpretation from memory/assumption of a relationship chart for castleaudios’ Glenwood universe because I love it soooooooo much and was trying to explain some of the characters to a friend, and I realized it’s really hard to explain LOLL so I thought I’d post it for the Glenwood season 1 recap occasion since I’m about to get into the video!
[CW for series spoilers on this chart if you haven’t listened to it btw]
#this series is so easy to get fixated on its sooo good#if u guys like audio stories and reader/listener insert stuff and supernatural shenanigans hit it up !!!#I don’t asmrpost much bc I tend to enjoy it in my own little world but my friends knowwww how bonkers I’ve been abt glenwood#I have fic wips and everything I’m trying to get some of them to listen but#it’s hard (and I love and respect them for it. BUT. BUT.)#anyway I spend too long making this so I figured I’d post cause it seems like there’s a little fandom for it which makes me sooooo happy !!#I hope I got everything right like I said it was all memory/assumption#castleaudios#castleaudios glenwood#glenwood series#asmr#be niceys to me abt it btw I’m shyyy but I think it came out nice !#rachelle’s is red w no heart btw bc it’s sorta posed as romantic or flirty or whatever but she sucks and it’s fake#fuck rachelle all my homies hate rachelle#canon one at least. friend au is acceptable
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…having thoughts abt gnc or transfem sparrow……
#cal rambles#OUGH. thinking abt this in the context of him being besties with Cass LMAO#and my hc that Cass is a transwoman#JUST 🥺 Cass helping Sparrow transition#exchanging tips finding outfits doing her makeup#THAT ONE DRAWINF OF THE TWO GIRLS WITH ONE LYING DOWN AND THE OTHER DOING HER MAKEUP#THATS SPARROW AND CASS ENWBAJANSF#also ik transboy Normal is a more common hc#but I personally see him as more gnc or like. nonbinary#in a ??? doesn’t even get the idea of gender norms anyways#he just likes wearing and doing whatever he likes#And I’m thinking in the context of like#transfem Sparrow and seeing her kid get all these weird stares for dressing the way he does#also lining up with Sparrow’s experience as a kid#bc you KNOW Henry and Mercedes encourages gender exploration#But I think Sparrow is especially sensitive to other ppl’s perception of her#and so she stopped dressing so gnc as an adult and never reached the OH IM TRANS realization#or maybe just repressed it#and so she sees her kid in her eyes stepping down that same path#and it scares her a little. but Normal is happy just the way he is#and I’m just thinking abt all of that. and Sparrow transitioning later in life as an adult#and AUGH. WUAGHHHHGHH#you get me
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i feel like i’m wasting my time on schoolwork that i ultimately don’t care about when i could be taking pictures of bugs and drawing yaoi and discussing what kind of lingerie light yagami would like based on his sense of fashion and personality
#like idgaf abt any of this shit rn. i was academia brained for like 16 years give me a fucking break#ik i’m planning to start my masters right after i graduate but honestly i need a break i want to yaoi for some time#unforch that cannot happen bc i am on an invisible timer that says if i don’t speedrun everything in life i will die which i have always#felt since i was young#this could be the result of untreated anxiety tbh but who cares#anyway i went outside to see the fireflies and i was like i’m going to cry i never get to go outside bc i’m busy w school and if i do#go outside to have fun i know i’ll be more stressed bc now i have less time to do school idk man. it’s making me sick i’m so stressed#w school and home and my family and needing to do things and not being built for living under capitalism and shit and it sucks#and i just want to take pictures and talk abt things i like and not have to worry abt shit but life sucks so whatever#i just feel like i’m wasting time doing things i don’t care abt when i could be doing literally anything else#like i already spent so so many fucking years of my life depressed or socially isolated and it fucked me up and is still fucking me up#like i haven’t talked to anyone outside of my immediate family in months and my ocd makes life so hard and my family makes it harder#and i feel like i’m just stuck here and will never be truly happy and that i’ve wasted so much of my life being miserable and that i’m#running out of time and spending it all doing shit i don’t even care about and for what reason#idk. i’m tired so i’m probs not making sense but i’m just. not happy with how my life is and idk if i will be for a long time or if i’ll#ever make it far enough to be happy u know
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I need to go to bed I’m just gonna shout a lil
#ice hockey needs to chill the fuck out#I had such a good night tonight!! was ssosososossososososo happy#but afterwards people started shouting in the group chat#and they all have very valid reasons for being angry but my god the us vs them mentality is STRONG#I am concerned abt how much people want to escalate things and how quickly they’re moving to do that#I am aware I am a doormat and a people pleaser or whatever but#I mean for one this is a tense political situation and we don’t wanna burn bridges#(there is no real politics i am being dramatic to be clear)#two clubs. alike in dignity. in fair Verona where we lay our scene#and I am personally managing at least 4 fragile egos that are all highly volatile#as well as an internal divide that’s threatening to cause problems very soon#I also should not be part of this anymore! and yet.#also why are specifically men who play team sports so dramatic when you get them all together#like that’s a whole shitstorm that is so easy to set off#anyway with my club I can’t blame the committee for being dramatic (different way to what I just said they’re not the same people)#bc I sure as fuck was overdramatic which fed into other people ramping up BUT that normally snapped me the fuck out of it#so I tempered the worst of it yknow. but I don’t think this new committee has that#/is not willing to listen to the person who would play that role#anyway if people don’t play nice it’s going to start some actual shit which will be deeply unpleasant for everyone#particularly the people who are in both clubs and do not deserve this bc they’ll be getting it from both sides and theyve done nothing wrong#anyway! bedtime now <3 I’m just frustrated bc the person who maybe would’ve calmed everyone down is out of commission#and I should not and am not willing to have the power to tell people to stop even though I probably still could#it’s whatever. sleep#luke.txt
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.
#cops tw#bro I cannot handle one more thing happening istg#got pulled over on my way home after a 13 hour day#was already scared to drive at night and that just confirmed that I’m right to be scared#it was for running a red light n it was one of those situations of just not having time to stop on yellow#I was fully aware as it was happening that I was either going to slam on my brakes in the intersection or run a red and I could see the cop#so I knew I was getting pulled over either way I just hoped the yellow would be longer than .5 seconds. not so lucky#except I also Am so lucky bc he let me off with a warning#ig bc I don’t have any sort of serious history + with it being 420 once he saw I was sober he prob went easier#it’s the second time I’ve been pulled over in my life tho and it’s scary bc this is the first time since the accident#which maybe that was also ok bc it wasn’t my fault#I just know every warning or unlucky moment costs u more in the future if u happen to get unlucky again#like I know I got out of that bc I’m white. it was still a scary moment bc there were multiple cop cars#so it’s like is this guy abt to ruin my life am I gonna lose my license for being at the wrong place wrong time#when I’m already salty to be driving this late involuntarily#so it’s like I got unlucky And very very lucky#I just hate the confirmation that u can get pulled over at any given moment#I constantly rehearse every possible convo w cops in my head bc if u come off disabled u can die#or get arrested or whatever#and then they like don’t follow the script and u didn’t expect this to happen to u today anyway and I get flustered#anyway my point is. I’m fucking exhausted and too many things keep happening#it’s long day after long day w no end in sight rn and I’m like half asleep every day#I just want to sleep. without feeling like I’m already tired tomorrow#it’s too much. just all of it#and on top of it all. it’s 420 so the whole dorm building is basically a cloud of weed#happy u guys are having fun but u are physically harming me in my home#mine#txt#vent post#personal
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MY FRIENDS R COMING TO MY HOOOUSSDEEEEEEEE YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Things I saw today ^
#uninhabitable zone get together THREE is about to BEGIN#also I had a job interview at a paint ur own pottery place & it went rlly well I think they will probably hire me :)#the clay studio I work at rn is closing which I am SO sad abt bc I love working there but hopefully this other place will also be good#I might be teaching kids for their summer camp program which is scary but also exciting!!! mostly exciting cause the stuff kids made with#clay is always so awesome & wonderful & it would make me happy 2 encourage creativity in them :) kids r so awesome at art forever tht shit#picaso or whatever said abt learning to draw like a kid was so real#anyway I have 2 go pick my friend up from the airport so early in the morning so I’m going sleep early good NIGHT
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i just want to see the rick happy,, or at least content w/ his life :( call me a pussy but i love that man and i hate seeing him suffer so much
#yeah yeah i know it’s for plot#and whatever else#but i want rick to be kind of happy#at least once :(#everything has been falling apart#i’m glad morty is standing up for himself though#i am super happy abt that#he’s a lil grown man#prolly bc he’s traumatized…#bc of rick …#ANYWAYS#i just love rick#and want him to smile more#love u baby#rick and morty#rick sanchez
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I love running so much. Like it’s not complicated you don’t need to be good at it you don’t need to go out and buy xyz beforehand. You don’t even need fancy running shoes really if you’re just running on your own. All it is is just “can I run? Do I want to run?” And if the answers are yes then you can just go out and run! You don’t have to be the fastest person in the world. There’s no standard. You don’t have to run a sub 25 5k or anything you just go out and put one foot in front of the other and enjoy it. Running is literally the best more people should do it
#S.K rants about running again#Probably just a personal thing but like it’s also really refreshing and helps me mentally#Like I don’t care about times in the way it defines how good I am. If I can cut a couple seconds off my average 5K time then I’ll be happy!#Like I dropped from like a 30 minute 5K to just over a 29 minute 5K and I was so happy with myself#And even when I’m not running competitively like get me some good tunes and give me like a half hour I’ll be good for the rest of the day#The conditions don’t have to be good either like I’ve ran in the rain it’s the best thing ever#Anyway yeah. If you want to do something productive go on a short little run!!! It’s fun I swear#No matter how slow or fast or whatever you may be. Don’t care abt anyone else#And a word of advice to any fellow XC runners: don’t beat yourself up over times. Especially if you’re on a team and competing#It’s one thing to know you’ve gotta improve a little and it’s another to be down in the dumps over a bad race#Trust me I’ve been there it sucks. But there are better races to come!!! Just you wait#S.K thinks#Sorry I ranted I just really like running
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Maybe this makes me a bitch but I literally couldn’t care less abt talking abt fandom stuff or things I like with anyone anymore
#₊˚⊹🏷️ from em#em thinks (too much)#q#my misery doesn’t make me a v nice or kind person unfortunately🗿#am working on that🤓🤓#I don’t see the point in talking abt anything tbh🤣🤣#makes me feel worse every single time🤣🥰#kind of sick of associating things with ppl ik or a fandom and it affecting my enjoyment of said thing#maybe that’s a bit dramatic but anyway i’m clinging to things that I keep to myself or enjoy from afar#I’ll just enjoy whatever by myself#who told me watching smth like nana w someone was going to end up good#not gonna introduce anyone to anything again lmfao#just one example but whejejks#I don’t want to share any thoughts abt anything let alone share thoughts abt things that make me happy#bc those will be taken away too#I promise I haven’t always been this bitter of a person
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jaz spam completed ✔️
#the way my online scouring just endeared me to her even more#she’s legitimately a role model of mine now—#esp because of the fact I found out we have similar upbringings as AFAB black kids growing up in Texas#anyway she’s such an inspiration and I’m genuinely happy for her and the success that is waiting for her#she’s such a beautiful soul ❤️❤️❤️❤️#she must be protected !!!#it’s war behind her fr bc I don’t play abt her and neither do the people actually in her life it seems ;;#parasocial relationship who? that’s my soul sister fr#whatever she wants- she’s gonna get TRUST
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anyway sorry to cap off my insane chip jrwi moment uh. one last complaint <3333
#like. love and light and do whatever makes you happy I’m not here to yuck your yum#but also. by god some of you are Missing Facets of Characters by focusing only on what (situation) could imply abt Your Ship#tbf I p much ONLY see this kind of take bc I follow the main tags so they just get shoved on my dash but like. bleugh#funniest is when they’re like RIGHT THERE ALMOST but. take a last minute turn away for ship purposes#anyway yeah this post is abt f+c’ers <(butchered to avoid showing up in searches)#(again I’m just being a hater for me I don’t actually want to like. cause a Fuss)
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:)
#idk where to scream abt this except twitter and I have been actively avoiding that hellsite#but I’M SO HAPPY!!!!#I’m so happy just inside out from the top of my toes to the top of my head#I love my job it’s so unstressful and my team is wonderful and my company treats me well#unstressful is not a real word WHATEVER#I’m writing again and just having so much fun with the process#I love my relationship#I’ve never had this kind of like. consistent deep rooted happiness ever in my entire life#so if you grew up a scared little child like me and never had it either one day it’s gonna come!!!!#I’ve even been kind of meh about my friend group lately#they genuinely hate hearing how happy I am lmfao#and I got a text from another friend I really like and she wants to go out and introduce me to some of her friend group she thinks I’ll#get along with!!#anyway…… good niiiiight
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