captainswan618 · 9 months ago
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it’s actually crazy to me how many TAZ things she’s already guessed right (or at least got the vibes right)??? like look at all of this!!
Ep 8:
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Ep 9:
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Ep 27:
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Ep 28:
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Ep 35:
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After ep 37, when I told her there was a parallel between TAZ and Doctor Who (vague spoilers for that, I guess? through s5):
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and before I even told her there was a parallel, she made a semi-joking prediction based on that same part in Doctor Who: “What if there was a 4th member of the party and they got killed or something and they got erased?”
anyway like!! how is she doing this!!!! I don’t remember a ton about what my theories were the first time I listened, but I definitely didn’t have all this????
7 notes · View notes
waitimcomingtoo · 7 months ago
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Just to Learn That You Never Cared
Pairing: Peter Parker x reader
Synopsis: always leaving class together to go fight crime leads people to think you’re dating when in reality you’re barely even friends. That is, until you agree to fake a relationship to keep your secret life a secret
requested/idea by @usoppsstar
Masterlist
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“Oh, hey. Your girlfriend left this in class.” One of Peter’s classmates said as he tossed Peter a hoodie.
“Oh. Thanks.” Peter said before realizing what the person had said. He turned the hoodie over in his hands and recognized it as yours. His face warmed up in a blush when he realized you had just been mistaken for his girlfriend. He shoved the hoodie into his bag and wondered if he should tell you or not.
Peter saw you later that night on a rooftop you frequented often. You were in your suit, as was he, but had your mask sitting beside you. You were munching on a bag of chips and wordlessly extended them to him when he landed on the rooftop beside you. He smiled graciously and took a few before sitting down next to you. Your knees were touching but neither of you moved away.
“You left this in physics, dingus.” Peter said and handed you your hoodie.
“Oh, thanks. We had to run out of there so fast to save that lady. I must’ve left it behind.” You smiled gratefully and pulled it over your head. Peter felt bad that his high tech suit had built in heaters and your homemade suit was probably leaving you freezing every night. He wanted to suggest sharing his warmth, but he didn’t want to overstep.
“I know. Thank God she called the police on those kids for selling lemonade without a permit. I’m really glad we left a test to go witness that heinous crime.”
“It’s not all bad. We did get to see the cops arrest her for wasting their time by making a fake police report, which is always satisfying. And the kids gave us free lemonade. But I think calling it “homemade” was bullshit. I know Minute Maid when I taste it.” You replied, making Peter chuckle.
“You’re right. Both those things were enjoyable.” Peter agreed. “But I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I feel like we have to leave class every other day.”
“I know. Why did we have to pick a college in such a Karen ridden neighborhood?” You sighed.
“Because we wanted to go to the good school with the good science program. We should’ve known the neighborhood would be full of bored housewives who call the police whenever they have a minor complaint. It was our own hubris.”
“It was.” You chuckled and said looked over at him. You exchanged soft smiles before you looked over at the city horizon. Peters eyes never left you and he cleared his throat to get your attention.
“So, uh, my aunt and I were gonna get Chinese food later. At the place that got shut down for being a front for money laundering but that was really just a front for a second Chinese food chain.”
“Oh, I love that place.”
“Yeah. It’s great.” He nodded. “Anyways, you should totally come-“
Peter was cut off by the police radio he wired to his phone going off. He rolled his eyes and checked what the alert was.
“Damn it. Robbery at the bakery on 9th.” He told you.
“Lowkey, I’d do the same. Their cream puffs made me cream.” You said as you put your mask back on.
“Haha, yeah.” Peter chuckled. “Wait, what?”
“You should get some sleep. I’ll handle the robbery. But I’ll catch you tomorrow, Parker. Get home safe.” You saluted him before falling backwards off the building.
“I love you too.” Peter sighed.
“Did you say something?” You asked and popped back up.
“No.” Peter quickly lied.
“Okay. Well, see you tomorrow.” You waved to him and disappeared again. Peter let out another sigh before swinging home.
The next day, you ran after one of your classmates once class was let out.
“Hey, Carly. I emailed you my notes from the class you missed.” You told her.
“Thank you so much. You’re a life saver.” She replied. “Oh, and could you tell your boyfriend that band practice is in the gym today?”
“Yeah, sure. No problem.” You agreed. She was about to walk away when you realized what she had said.
“Wait, what am I saying?” You wondered. “Who’s my boyfriend?”
“You know. That guy with the prescription shoes.” Carly answered. You tilted your head in confusion until you realized you knew exactly who she was talking about.
“Wait, Peter?” You laughed in surprise. You expected her to laugh too and reveal she was just kidding but she looked completely serious.
“Oh, right. Peter. Why do I always think his name is Timmy?” Carly wondered.
“Because he looks like a Timmy. He gets it all the time.” You waved your hand. “And his shoes are not prescription. He just bought women’s platform shoes because he wanted to be taller and didn’t think anyone could tell.”
“We can.” Carly mumbled.
“I know.” You agreed. “But, I’m getting off topic. Timmy is not my boyfriend. I mean, Peter is not my boyfriend.”
“Whatever label you guys use, can you tell him that wind ensemble is meeting in the gym instead of the choir room? The sopranos kicked us out again to practice or do drugs or something.” Carly explained. You furrowed your eyebrows at her and tried to figure out if she was joking or not.
“The label? I’m so lost. Who told you that Peter’s my boyfriend?”
“Nobody told me.” She shrugged. “Everyone just knows that you guys are a couple.”
“Well how would they know something that isn’t true?” You asked and folded your arms.
“I mean, it’s not like you guys try to keep it a secret. Between all the whispering and staying close by each other. Plus you’re always sneaking out of class together or showing up late. And if one of you is absent, the other always is too. It’s been like that since high school. People just put two and two together I guess. Why, did you want to to be secret?”
“I didn’t want it to be anything. We’re not even dating.” You insisted and felt like you were going crazy.
“You don’t have to deny it.” Carly laughed. “I know feelings are weird and gross and stuff and you’ve never been the relationship type, but I think this guy is good for you. He brings something out in you. I don’t know. But you guys are cute. I love seeing the nice loser and assertive pretty girl troupe in real life.”
“Oh. Well, thank you.” You calmed down momentarily and smiled a little. Carly walked away and your smile quickly faded when you remembered what she had said. You looked around the hallway and saw another student holding an instrument.
“Hey. Band nerd.” You called out to him.
“Me?” He asked and pointed to himself.
“Yes, you. You had to let go of your saxophone case to point to yourself. Have you seen my boyfriend today?” You asked him.
“Peter? I haven’t seen him since yesterday in-“
“That sentence better not end with “wind ensemble” or I’m gonna lose it.”
“It was wind ensemble.” He said quickly.
“I’m leaving.” You shook your head and walked away from him. You pulled out your phone and went straight to your schools “campus sweethearts” page on instagram. Sure enough, there was a picture of you and Peter sitting next to each other right at the top of the page. You had your head thrown back laughing at something he was saying and he was looking at you fondly. You let out a shocked gasp and before walking out into the courtyard to look for Peter. You spotted him on a bench and smiled.
“Yes. Thank you, small campus”. You pumped your fist and went to sit next to him.
“Oh, hi. I was just thinking about you-“
“Someone is spreading a horrible rumor about you.” You cut him off.
“Oh no.” Peter frowned. “What is it? Is it bad?”
“Horrible.” You shook your head. “Peter, they’re saying you’re in wind ensemble.”
“Oh, I am.” Peter shrugged.
“Huh?”
“I play the clarinet . See. Clarinet.” Peter said and lifted up his little black clarinet case.
“Huh?” You said louder.
“I used to play in high school, pre-bite but post 9/11. I saw a flyer for orchestra on campus so I joined.”
“And you didn’t tell me?” You practically shouted. Peter knew you weren’t happy but felt strangely honored that you were so upset over him not telling you something about her personal life.
“Because I know how you feel about band nerds.” He replied. “And you and I don’t really talk about non-work related things. I didn’t think you’d care.”
“Are you kidding me? Of course I care.” You insisted. “My rumored boyfriend has been in wind ensemble this whole time and I didn’t even know?”
“Wait, rumored boyfriend? Who, me?” Peter asked in surprised.
“So you didn’t know about this either?”
“No. I mean, someone did refer to you as my girlfriend the other day but I thought it was just an accident. People think you and me are dating?” Peter asked and tried not to look as pleased as he felt.
“Apparently. I’ve had multiple people refer to you as my boyfriend today. And look. We’re on the campus couples Instagram page.” You said and held up your phone.
“Ew. We have one of those?” Peter grimaced and took your phone to see the picture better.
“Yeah. I honestly think the principle runs it.” You replied. Peter was quiet as he stared at the picture for a while.
“What?” You wondered.
“Nothing. This just a cute picture of us. And I think the only picture of us.” He said with a shy smile. You frowned and looked at the picture again before realizing he was right.
“Carly said people think we’re dating since we’re always sneaking off together.” You told him. Peter thought out this for a minute and then made another connection.
“Ohhhh.” He said and nodded his head.
“What?”
“This explains why the boys congratulated me on the bus back to New York after the Washington monument trip for losing my virginity at a historic landmark.”
“You lost your virginity on that trip? To who?” You whispered harshly and felt jealousy burning through your veins.
“You, apparently.” He laughed. “You and I disappeared to get the glowy alien egg bomb thing back and I guess everyone assumed we were off desecrating a national monument.”
“Oh my God. That was like 3 years ago.” You realized. “People have thought we were dating this whole time? We need to put a stop to this.”
“Yeah. You’re right. Or…” Peter trailed off and gave you a look.
“Or?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Or, we lean into it.” He suggested. “We let people think it. We encourage it, even.”
“Why would we do that?”
“People have been suspicious about where we go and what we’re doing since high school. We can only fake so many illnesses and I ran out of grandparents to lie about the death of by junior year. So if people already made up a reason, maybe we should let them think that. We don’t have to go out of our way to confirm it but we can keep the assumption going to keep them from finding out what we’re really doing.”
“So you think we should let people think we’re dating so they stop wondering about what we’re always off doing?”
“That’s exactly what I just said, yes.” Peter nodded.
“Hey. Be nicer to your fake girlfriend.” You said and smacked his arm.
“I’m sorry. I will.” Peter blushed and rubbed his arm. You felt bad for hitting him and wrapped both arms around him to rub them up and down. He smiled softly at you and you sat in comfortable silence for a moment.
“You play the clarinet?” You asked after a minute.
“Squidward made it look so cool.” Peter shrugged.
“Did he?” You asked, making Peter laugh.
“No.” He admitted.
The next day, you and Peter walked to school together with the understanding that from then on out, you were going to play the part of a happy couple. You weren’t going to go around announcing it to everyone or anything. You just needed to convince the few that didn’t already believe the rumor and confirm things for the ones who did believe it.
“You ready for this?” You asked Peter as you stepped into campus.
“I think so. Maybe we should hold hands or something. You know, since people think we’re dating.” Peter suggested and tried to make it sound like it didn’t matter to him.
“I guess so.” You shrugged and held out your hand. Peter eagerly took your hand and took note of the way it fit in his like it was made for him.
“This is weird.” You whispered to him, popping his bubble.
“Why? Are my hands sweaty?” He panicked.
“No. Just really, really hot.” You told him. “It’s just weird that nobody seems to care that we’re holding hands right now.”
“I mean, we are just two random people with almost no social presence.”
“That’s true. I guess I just thought people would care more.” You admitted as you looked around the campus. No one was phased by you and Peter, but he was too busy enjoying the moment to realize it.
“Are you disappointed?” He asked you.
“Yeah. I wore my best bra because I thought I’d be getting more attention today.” You frowned and adjusted the strap of your bra.
“It’s okay. I’ll take one for the team and stare at your boobs.” Peter assured you.
“Aw. Thank you.” You gushed and gave his hand a squeeze.
You got to your physics class and sat together at your usual lab table. Peter looked around the classroom while you carried on as usual.
“Maybe I should put my arm around you. You know, to really convince people.” Peter suggested with a shy blush on his face.
“Is that really something people do?” You genuinely wondered. “I feel like I never see couples with their arms around each other.”
“Actually, I don’t think I have either. But let’s try it anyway.” He said and wrapped an arm around you. You scooted closer to him so that you could comfortably lean into him. You quickly realized you didn’t hate it and let out a content sigh.
“Hm.” Peter made a little noise at the back of his throat.
“What?” You asked him.
“Our height difference makes this hurt my shoulder.” He leaned over to whisper in your ear.
“Then move your arm.” You whispered back.
“I can’t. I just wrapped it around you. It’ll look weird if I immediately take it off.” Peter said as he covered behind him to see who was looking.
“Or, consider this. Nobody in this entire city, and dare I say world, cares where your arm is right now.” You whispered harshly.
“Fine. I’ll remove it. But I have to give a reason.” He told you before loudly clearing his throat.
“Ah. Sorry, babe. I can’t cuddle you right now. My arm is sore from band practice.” Peter said loud enough for everyone in the classroom to hear him. You hung your head in shame and heard people murmuring about his strange comment.
“Oh God.” Peter gulped. “People are looking. They’re gonna know something is up. I have to put it back.”
He went to put his arm back around you but you stopped him before he could draw any more attention to the two of you.
“Just do this.” You whispered to him and pulled his stool closer to you and turned towards him a little. Your knees and were touching and you were now facing each other.
“That’s it? No one can even see this.” Peter said in disappointment. He thought being your fake boyfriend would bring you guys closer but you were sitting the way you always sat in class.
“It’s not about what people can see. It’s about proximity.” You explained. “We’re sitting closer together than anyone else is without being egregious about it. It’s a simple touch. If we’ve been together as long as people think we have, we don’t need to be wrapped around each other all the time. A simple touch to let the other know we’re there is all we need.”
Peter was silent as he stared at you following your explanation. He stared for so long that you felt yourself blush under the eye contact.
“What?” You asked him.
“I like the way you explain things.” Peter said simply. You quickly looked down so he wouldn’t see the effect that comment had on you and took a moment to collect yourself.
“It’s just something I thought of.” You shrugged.
“I know. But I never would have thought of that. Especially not as naturally as it did for you. You’re so quick.”
“Thank you.” You laughed shyly and found yourself unable to look away from him. Peter opened his mouth to say something to keep the momentum rolling but his phone interrupted him.
“Shoot. Sus-tivity on the b bridge.” He whispered.
“What the hell does that mean?” You asked at full volume.
“It means there’s suspicious activity on the Brooklyn bridge.” He rolled his eyes. “We have to act fast so I didn’t have time to say the whole thing.”
“But you just said the whole thing. And the abridged version. So it took twice as long.”
“Shh.” He waved his hand. “We gotta go.”
You reluctantly collected your things and took Peter’s hand to pull him out of his seat. Peter followed you out the classroom but the teacher cleared her throat when you walked by.
“And where are you two going?” She asked. You and Peter exchanged looks as the class snickered and murmured their theories about what exactly you were heading off to do.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Pepper. My girlfriend and I have to leave class unexpectedly. Please excuse us. It’s urgent.” Peter’s said politely.
“I bet it’s urgent, Parker.” A boy snickered, making serval classmates laugh.
“Gross.” You wrinkled your noses and looked at the boys in disdain.
“Fine.” The teacher sighed. “The only reason I don’t write you two up for skipping so often is because you somehow have the best grades in the class. Go on. Just get the homework done.”
“We will.” You assured her before leaving the room with Peter. Peter noticed that you didn’t drop his hand even when you were alone in the hallway.
“Hey, you know that teachers name is Dr. Zhang and not Dr. Pepper, right?” You asked him.
“Oh my God.” Peter gasped. “Is it really? I’ve emailed her so many times and said “Dear Dr. Pepper”. We have to drop out.”
You laughed and held his hand the rest of the way out of the building.
That night, Peter laid in his bed with his phone held close to his face. He had been trying to figure out what to text you to let you know he had been thinking of you.
“I had fun fighting crime with you today” He wrote out. He read it over before scrunching his nose.
“No. Too cringe. She is not gonna fall in love with someone that says “fighting crime”. I’m not Paw Patrol.” He said like it was obvious. He deleted his text and thought of another one.
“I had a good time today, we make a good team” He wrote out instead. He read it a few times until he found issue with it.
“Oh, you had a good time stopping those break dancers that were obstructing that Sbarro? That’ll catch her attention.” Peter said sarcastically and deleted the text.
“have a goodnight :)” He typed out and then shook his head.
“No. Wayyyy too horny.” He sighed and deleted it again.
“night” He wrote out and read it a few times.
“This is good. I can work with this.” He nodded. He was about to workshop it when a text from you popped up.
“pick a color” It said. Peters heart skipped a beat at the vague message and replied with the first color that popped into his head.
“blue”
“thank u” You wrote back within seconds. Peters heart stopped pounded and the disappointment that the conversation was over settled in. After all these years of fighting crime together, you two never really managed to make it past the coworkers stage. He was desperate for more but never knew how to get there.
“no homo but I had fun fighting crime with you today” You suddenly texted again. A smile tugged at Peter’s lips and he touched his as if it were your face.
“ok paw patrol” He wrote back. Back in your room, you were laughing at his text and trying to think of a witty reply.
“ur mad bc you know I’m the chase 🐶” You texted him.
“if ur the Chase then who am I?”
“plssss ur such a marshall” You wrote back.
“but that’s the third most important dog :(“ Peter replied.
“well yes but he’s cute and wears red so the little paw patrol shoe fits” You answered. A blush painted Peters cheeks over you calling him cute but he didn’t want to read too much into it.
“Im wearing red right now😳” He texted back.
“oh I bet you are” You answered, making him laugh. He kept the conversation going for about an hour before duty called once again. Peter groaned and put his suit on before swinging to the scene of the crime. He met you there and stopped the crime before stopping on a nearby rooftop to rest.
“These burglars aren’t very considerate of our sleep schedules. Who robs a Jersey Mikes after midnight? Or, like, ever?” Peter huffed as he tugged his mask off.
“I know. They’re always at inconvenient times. I was in the middle of painting my nails.”
“Can I see?” He asked in a soft voice. You pulled your gloves off and held out your hand for him to see.
“Look. Blue. But I only got half way through before Mike’s was targeted.”
“It’s okay. They still look pretty.” Peter complimented you with a soft smile.
“Thanks. You picked a good color.” You replied.
“What do you mean?” He frowned.
“I told you to pick a color. This is why.” You explained and held out your hand again. His eyes lit up at this new information and he took your hand to see your nails closer.
“You let me chose your nail color?” He smiled fondly.
“Well I didn’t know what to chose so I thought I’d ask the audience.” You shrugged and felt shy all of the sudden.
“Oh. And I’m the target audience, huh?” Peter smirked and turned towards you.
“I never said target.” You teased him and shoved him shoulder.
“I must be hearing things, then.” He shrugged as you both smiled.
“Yeah. Must be.” You said in a soft voice as you stared into his eyes. Peter gulped before making a bold move and taking your hand again under the guise of looking at your nails.
“Look at you. You even got my favorite shade.” He noted.
“You like “Eating For Blue”?” You pretended to gasp.
“Is that really the name of the color?” He laughed.
“Uh huh. It was apart of Essie’s baby fever collection. I almost chose “All In Blue Time” but that’s one tends to get little air bubbles and they give me agida. And I used to have “A Dream Come Blue” but it rolled under the sink so it belongs to the dust bunnies now.” You shrugged as you checked out your nails.
“Wow. This is all new information to me. So, are all nail polish colors named after puns and wordplay?” He asked as he stared into your eyes. He didn’t really care, but he was finally getting somewhere with you and didn’t want it to end.
“In my experience, yes. Not always color related wordplay but always something that makes you go yeah, I guess this shade of beige is what the word “ladylike” would be as a color.”
“This is blowing my mind right now.” Peter chuckled.
“You mean blue-ing your mind.” You corrected and tapped the side of your head.
“I think you inhaled too many of those fumes. Because that was not funny.” Peter said through a laugh.
“What?” You pretended to be offended. “You’re literally laughing right now. I’m so funny.”
“You are.” Peter admitted when his laughter died down. You stared into eyes for a minute before smiling.
“Is that what you rumored saw in me?” You asked him.
“Probably.” He chuckled. “I also heard a rumor that I think you’re really pretty. Like, the prettiest girl I was ever rumored to have allegedly seen.”
“Now you’re the one who’s looney from the fumes because that’s a straight up lie. I know you’ve seen prettier girls because I was standing right next to you when Anne Hathaway left that diner.” You said without making eye contact with him. Things were moving a little too fast and you needed it hit the brakes for a second.
“Oh, yeah. You’re right.” Peter forced a laugh and awkwardly looked over at the cityscape when he realized you were politely telling him to pull back.
“But I appreciate it.” You said after a beat of silence.
“Of course. Sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking saying that.” He laughed nervously. “I was just getting caught up in the fake dating. We’ve been doing it for so long that it felt real.”
“We only started this morning.” You reminded him.
“Right. Well, it’s late. I’m gonna go home.” He said quickly and stood up. He had just blown that and needed to leave as quickly as possible.
“Okay. Goodnight. See you at school.” You called after him. Peter swung home with tears in his eyes and went straight to bed, missing your text about having fun fighting another crime.
The next day at school, Peter decided to start over and push last night from his mind. He played the part of your boyfriend to the best of his abilities and opened every door, pulled out every seat, and carried ever book for you all day long. Then he did it the next day, and the day after that. He kept his mouth shut about his feelings day in and day out no matter how painful it was getting. You and Peter had finally moved past the coworker stage and become real friends so he didn’t want to sabotage it all by telling you that he spent his days wishing for more.
“What are your plans tonight?” You asked him one day as you walked out of class together.
“My aunt is going out with her friends so I was probably gonna watch a movie on my couch. But on my laptop with my earbuds in. Likely in my boxers. Likely with an entire package of Twizzlers. Why?”
“Well I was gonna suggest that we hang out but you sound booked.”
“Really? You want to hang out?” Peter asked with much more enthusiasm than he intended.
“If you want. I’m not doing anything as exciting as boxers and Twizzlers.”
“I would love to. I’ll put on pants for you. I promise.”
“Sounds good.” You laughed. “Text me your address, okay?”
“Sure. Or you could walk with me now. Unless you’re tired of me and need a break before we hang out.” Peter suggested as you left campus together.
“It’s funny you say that. I was just telling my mom the other day that I never get tired of you.” You said casually.
“You..you don’t?” Peter’s face heated up as he followed you down the sidewalk.
“I don’t. I usually need a break from other people if we’ve been together awhile but it’s different with you. It doesn’t feel like I’m using my social battery if that makes sense.“
“It makes sense.” He smiled shyly as your hands bumped against each others. He was about to make a bold move and take your hand despite no one being around but you suddenly moved it to hit the crosswalk button.
Back at Peter’s apartment, he awkwardly gave you a tour and wished he had picked up his clothes before leaving the house that morning. You didn’t seem to mind the socks and boxers strewn across his room because you were too focused on all the little things he kept on his shelves. You picked up a picture frame of your freshman year high school class that had you and Peter seated right next to each other. Your friendship had only just begun so you often forgot how long you knew him for.
“So this is your room.” You smiled and put the picture back.
“Yup. This is where the magic happens.” Peter said and immediately cringed at himself.
“Oh really?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Yeah. This is where I practice magic. Wanna see?” He asked and picked up a deck of cards. You laughed and went over to take one.
“Is your card the ace of spades?” He asked.
“Queen of hearts.” You snorted and turned the card around.
“You’re the queen of my heart.” He whispered.
“Did you say something?” You asked as you looked at all his Legos.
“I asked what you wanted to do tonight.” He lied.
“I don’t know. We have the place to ourselves. We could do something rated R.” You said with a coy smile.
“Like what?” Peter gulped.
“Watch an R rated movie, you perv. Your aunt isn’t here to stop you.”
“You remember me telling you that I’m not allowed to watch R rated movies in the living room anymore?” Peter blushed at you remembering something he had randomly told you long ago.
“Are you referring to the time you watched Tusk at full volume while she had her friends from work over for the first time? How could I forget?”
“In my defense, I didn’t know what the movie was about. And I didn’t think her friends were gonna come into the living room and see that guy getting turned into a walrus.”
“Yeah, the title and cover art gave no indication that the movie would end that way. But that’s not a bad idea actually. Let’s watch something scary.”
“Okay.” Peter agreed and followed you out into the living room. He turned off the lights and got some snacks while you picked a movie. He hated scary movies but he was not about to tell you that. Instead, he sat on the couch beside you as a respectful distance and handed you a bag of chips. As the movie went on, you got closer and closer to each other. Peter had never really seen you scared before but you were practically in his lap just 40 minutes into the movie. You reached into the bag of chips at the same time as Peter and your fingers touched. You both froze and looked at each other as your faces heated up.
“Shit. I’m not wearing a condom.” Peter sighed, making you yank your hand out and laugh.
“You’re stupid.” You laughed and turned back to the movie just as a jump-scare happened. You screamed and jumped closer to Peter.
“This is so scary. Why did I pick this movie?” You asked as you drew your knees up and leaned into his side.
“Yeah, same.” He replied, not even listening. He couldn’t hear anything over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. You were cuddled into his side with your head on his shoulder and knees in his lap with a blanket drawn up to your nose. He knew you were only cuddling him because you were scared but it didn’t even matter at that point. The movie went quiet for a minute and then made a loud sound, sending you to burry your face into Peter’s neck.
“Tell me when it’s safe to come out.” You whispered into his ear. Peter gulped and wrapped an arm around you to fully protect you from the movie.
“I will.” He said in a soft voice. You peaked your head out a few minutes later but stayed nestled into Peter’s side. You realized his arm was around you and smiled a little.
“Oh, this isn’t so bad.” You shrugged as the main character got eaten alive.
“I don’t understand you.” Peter chuckled and looked down at you. You laughed as well as you looked into his eyes. He was about to say something when another sharp sound from the movie caused you to jump.
“Hold my hand.” You blurted and grabbed his hand. Peter happily accepted and clasped your hand before holding it under his chin. You stayed in that position for a long time and watched the movie. You were both so focused on the screen that you didn’t hear May opening the front door and coming in.
“Hey. I’m home.” She said, making you both scream.
“Oh, hi May.” Peter greeted while he realized it was just her.
“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Parker. I’m-“
“I know.” She smirked. “I’ll just be in my room. But, Peter?”
“Yeah?”
“No going in your room with the door closed, okay? I’m home. And we have thin walls. Just keep that in mind.” She said, making Peter turn bright red.
“Got it, May.” He mumbled. She winked at you and disappeared into her bedroom.
“You told your aunt we were dating?” You whispered to Peter in confusion.
“No.” Peter answered honestly. “I guess she just assumed we were.”
“Wow. She’s just like the kids at school.” You shook your head. “I don’t get it. Why does everyone think we’re dating?”
“I mean���” Peter trailed off and looked down at your clasped hands. You hadn’t realized you were still cuddling and quickly jumped off of him. Peters heart sank and the longer he sat in the absence of your body heat, the more upset he felt.
“You just jumped off of me like I was sharp.” He said without looking at you.
“I didn’t want your aunt to see us cuddling and think-“
“And think what?” He snapped, cutting you off. You gutted your head back in surprise and let out a nervous laugh.
“Woah. What’s going on with you? She already knows about your secret life. We don’t have any reason to pretend we’re dating in front of her.”
Peter stared at you for a long time as the word “pretend” cut into him like a knife. Every time he thought you were going somewhere, he was reminded that it didn’t actually mean anything to you.
“Yeah. You’re right.” He mumbled and looked at the movie again. You kept your eyes on him and felt guilty. You had so much to say to him but you felt unable to speak.
“Peter-“
“I don’t think we should pretend to date anymore.” He blurted, cutting you off once again. Your eyebrows went up in surprise and you got a sick feeling in your tummy that you had just ruined something really important.
“What? Why not?”
“It’s stupid. No one even cares anymore.” He shrugged. “We don’t have to fake a breakup or anything but I don’t want to hold hands or play along anymore. I’m done.”
“What changed?” You asked in a soft voice. He was still looking at the movie while you were fully turned to face him.
“Nothing changed. That’s the problem.” He said and angrily got off the couch. You quickly caught his hand and he stopped. He looked down at the ground and let out a sigh. He knew it wasn’t fair to be mad at you if he hadn’t told you what was wrong. He slowly turned around and looked at you.
“Five years ago, you showed up to the same robbery at an all night CVS that I was at and I realized we knew each other from AP Spanish class because I had asked you earlier that day how to conjugate “poner” and you said “pusiste” and I laughed because I thought you were joking but you weren’t and then that night you heard me tell the burglar that he better“pusiste” the money back into the register.“ Peter began.
“Okay. Wow. That was a really long sentence.” You laughed softly. “But I remember that. I laughed and told you that you better remember that for the test.”
“You did. That’s how I knew it was you.” He smiled at the memory. “I failed that test, by the way. I still can’t conjugate “poner.” And I still think it means “boner” even though I know it’s a verb. But anyway, that night, I couldn’t sleep because I was so excited to have met you. Even though we technically already knew each other, that night put us in each others radars. I could not believe that I had met my match. You’re into science like me and sarcastic like me and you understand this side of my life because you have the same side. But despite running into each other on patrol almost nightly and seeing each other around school, I barely got you to notice me. I don’t think you even knew my name until we ended up going the same college. You called me “Timmy” all throughout high school.”
“You seriously look like one. It’s uncanny. I don’t know what it is.”
“I thought things would change when I found out we were going to the same college. The campus is so small I figured there’s no way we wouldn’t become friends. But even then, we hardly ever talked and when we did it was always about work. I didn’t even know where you lived until last semester.”
“I remember that too. The first night we really bonded was when you fell off that roof because you were trying to show me how to do a backflip.”
“Yeah, I’ve never been able to do a backflip.” He admitted. “I only said I could because you said you always wanted to learn how to do one and I assumed given my abilities I’d be able to do one if I just followed my body. But I busted my ass and you were kind enough to sneak me through your window and patch me up with some Scooby Doo bandaids.”
“It was all I had.” You shrugged.
“And you gave it to me anyway. Because you’re kind and compassionate and I’m just…I’m crazy about you.” Peter finally admitted. “I was so excited when we started hanging out more this semester but it always ended up crushing me when I remembered that we just doing it to keep people from finding out the truth. I really, really love our friendship and if I’m ruining it all by saying all this then at least I can die with it off my chest.”
“Wait, now I’m confused. Are you dying?”
“Maybe.” He shrugged. “It feels like I am every time you and I start to get close and then I remember this is all pretend for you.”
“So it’s not pretend for you?” You asked quietly. Peter stared into your heads for a minute and then shook his head.
“No. I was never pretending. I like you.” He told you. Your facial expression didn’t change as you stared back at him. Peter was really starting to panic until a smile tugged at your lips.
“Sit back down.” You told him.
“I’m sat.” He said and rushed it sit down. You nestled back into his side and laid your head down on his shoulder. Peter smiled and rested his head on top of yours, finally pleased with the way a conversation with you went. You both turned your attention back to the movie just in time for it to end.
“Hm.” You huffed. “That was supposed to be us symbolically finishing the movie as a real couple but it appears we’ve already arrived at the credits. Now what?”
“We could watch Tusk.” Peter suggested at the same time you said “We could make out.”
“I never actually saw Tusk but I always wanted to.” You gasped and hit his arm with excitement.
“Or we could do your thing.” Peter forced a laugh and tried not to sound as desperate as he felt.
“Let me see if I can find it.” You said as you scrolled through the streaming services on his TV.
“Or we could do your thing.”
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katsu28 · 28 days ago
Text
summer's golden haze - chapter two
pairing: lando norris x reader
summary: backyard barbecues, the local market, and an unexpected discovery that has you wondering what exactly you may have just gotten yourself into. (5k)
warnings: angst (this early on, i know i'm sorry but it's for the plot i promise <3), lando and max f bickering like an old married couple
a/n: she's here!!!! sorry it took a little longer than expected but i hope you all enjoy this chapter :) pls feel free to come chat in my asks if you want to, i'd love to hear what everyone think about it so far!
previous chapter | masterlist
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“Are these guys rich or something?”
Camille voices exactly the thought running through your mind as you roll to a stop to the address Lando had texted you yesterday, gawking out at the sprawling acreage in front of you. 
You peer at the impressive villa through the windshield, taking in everything with baited breath. She’s absolutely right. 
This house has to be two, if not three times the size of the one you’re all staying at, and that’s just what you can see so far. Vines bursting with colorful flowers crawl up white stone walls, curling around trellises of even more foliage, shutters on huge windows. There’s even a massive fountain in the middle of the courtyard, pristine marble, spewing crystal clear water in streams. 
It’s a classic old money countryside villa—worth millions, you assume, not even taking in the gathering of vintage and expensive sports cars parked along the cobblestone driveway. You suddenly feel so, so small compared to the extravagance of just the exterior of the place. 
Who are these people? 
A guy with brown curls similar to Lando’s pulls open the door when you ring the bell, in the middle of yelling something at someone further inside the house, before turning his gaze on you all. His face lights up in recognition at the sight of you. “Oh, hey, you’re the girl Lando won’t shut up about! I’m Max, but I’m sure he’s told you all about me, hasn’t he?” 
So this is Max. Lando’s told you a little about him, but mainly just funny stories. You wonder if Max knows his best friend is going around telling girls he’s just met about the time Max walked into a glass sliding door. 
“A little bit, not much. It’s nice to put a face to the name though!” You say politely. 
Max sighs dramatically, shaking his head in faux disappointment. He and Lando must be close. “I’m the best part of his life, and he doesn’t think to share it! What a knob. Anyways, welcome, come on in, make yourselves at home!” 
He ushers you all inside, leading you through the house and out huge double French doors leading to the backyard. The rest of their group sits on couches gathered around a stone fire pit, drinks in hand, chatting amongst themselves until they see you all coming. Max does the introductions between your two groups, but there’s one person missing. The one person you were looking forward to seeing again is nowhere to be found. 
Max must notice how your eyes search for Lando, because he grins knowingly. “He’ll be out in a bit. Work called.” 
“Oh, what does he do?” Samira chimes in. You fight the urge to throw a stone at her, because you know what she’s doing. She’s getting information on Lando because you haven’t got the guts to do it yourself yet. 
“Has he not told you yet?” Max raises a brow, taking a sip of his drink. When you shake your head, he presses his lips together, like he’s debating whether or not to tell you himself. “Yeah, sorry, I think I’m gonna stay out of this one. He gets pissy when I meddle with his budding relationships.” 
Budding relationship. Your face flames hot at the insinuation, but Samira takes it in stride, raising a skeptical brow. 
“What, is he in the mafia or something?” 
“‘Course not, that’s ridiculous. Pretty boy like him, he’d never make it in the mafia,” Max snorts. “No, he’s…look, it’s not really my place to say. I’m sure he’ll tell you when he’s ready.” 
Lando materializes from inside at that very moment, brows furrowed. There’s a tic going off in his jaw and he looks a little pissed off about something, but as soon as he looks up and sees that there’s company, he composes himself in a split second. 
“Hey, guys!” He chirps, hand raising in a wave. He makes his way over to where you all are, plopping down in the empty spot beside you without hesitation. “Glad you could make it.” 
“Thanks for the invite,” Maren replies, ever the polite one. “And the coffee yesterday.” 
Max makes an offended noise from the back of his throat at his friend. “You bought them coffee yesterday? Where was mine? You never buy me coffee.” 
“Mate, you don’t even drink coffee!” 
“Maybe I would if you bought it for me!” 
The two boys continue to bicker with each other in the same way all evening, which leads you to believe this is just how they are with one another. It gives Lando another dimension in your mind, and you like it.
There are a handful of common interests amongst your friends and Lando’s, ones that spark conversation immediately. As the night goes on, it feels like you’ve all been friends for a while, and you’re glad. Part of you was worried things would be awkward between everyone, but thankfully that isn’t the case.
It passes the time quicker than you expect. Soon enough it’s nearing midnight and you’re close to nodding off onto Lando’s shoulder, fighting to stay awake and looped into the ongoing conversation despite the sleep threatening to overtake you.
It certainly doesn’t help that he exudes warmth from where you’ve wound up pressed against each other on the small couch. You turn your head to look at him, to take in the little details of him. The angle of his jaw, the slope of his nose. The smattering of moles across his face and neck.
One wayward curl hangs over his forehead, and you want to reach out, brush it away. You don’t think you’re quite at that stage of comfort with each other yet, but then he tears his attention away from the rest of the group and meets your gaze with what you can only describe as pure fondness dripping from his lazy grin. 
“You alright?” He says softly, shifting his body to face you a little more. 
You nod, because you’re more than alright. For the first time in a while, everything feels just the way it should be. “Are you?” 
“Hm?” Lando replies noncommittally, sipping his drink. “Fine, why?” 
“Earlier, after your phone call, you seemed…upset. I don’t mean to pry, I just wanted to see if everything was alright.” 
“Oh, that? Nah, that was nothing, just my boss. Wanted to talk work stuff, but I wasn’t feeling it, y’know?” He shrugs. It feels like there’s more to what he’s saying, but you don’t want to push too hard. You’re still familiarizing yourself with him. “You’re sweet to check on me, though.” 
“Okay. But if you, um, if you need to talk or anything, I’ve been told I’m a good listener.”
Lando traces a finger briefly over the thin strap of your dress, just over your shoulder, before dropping his chin into his palm. You already know he’s about to change the subject. Involuntarily, you shiver at his touch, and he definitely notices, because he suddenly looks a little smug.
“Pretty dress,” He hums, tilting his head. 
You weren't trying to make a good impression on Lando, but you weren't exactly not trying, if that makes sense. It doesn't really make sense to you, but you’d gone for cute but comfy with a dress you’d borrowed, hoping it says you’d made an effort, but not too much of one. 
Suddenly you can’t remember what you were just thinking about not being at a certain stage of comfort with one another. Is it weird that you're secretly pleased he liked it enough to mention it?
“It’s not mine,” You say softly. Lando lets out a noise of question. “I borrowed it from Maren.” 
“Ah. Well, you should definitely get one for yourself then. It’s a nice color on you.” 
You want to say thank you, or really just say anything at all, but the moment your gaze flicks back up to his, you’re lost in his eyes again. Everything around you blurs into the background until it feels like it’s just the two of you. You’re teetering on the edge of something, and fuck, it would be so easy to just go over. To let yourself fall and fall and fall into his waiting arms at the bottom. 
Suddenly you hear your own voice in your head.
Don’t get attached. 
Clearing your throat, you pull back from Lando as smooth as you can manage with him muddling up your brain like this. “It’s late. We should get going,” You say, a tad louder than necessary. 
“She’s right,” Camille chimes in, taking note of the slight urgency in your tone. “We’ve got a guided hike in the morning—sunrise, can you believe it?” 
Lando’s mouth dips into a tiny frown for a moment, but it disappears as quickly as it appeared. He nods understandingly. “Sure. I’ll walk you out.” 
You all say your goodbyes and thank you’s, to which the boys wholeheartedly agree you should all do this again sometime before you part ways. 
Lando trails behind a bit like he’s unsure, but catches up to you quickly on the way out, shoulder bumping against yours lightly as you fall into step with each other. His hand brushes yours and lingers a little, pinkies almost intertwining. 
“Tonight was nice,” He says casually. 
“Yeah, it was,” You agree, bobbing your head. 
“Would you—I dunno, maybe want to hang out again?”
“With you guys? ‘Course we would, I’m sure the girls would love to.” You smile, casting a glance at your friends. They’ve all coincidentally already gotten into the car, but if you squint hard enough you can see them gawking at Lando and yourself through the windshield.
How very not subtle of them. 
Lando rocks on the balls of his feet almost nervously, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. “No, I meant, like…just the two of us.” 
“You mean, like, alone?” 
“A date. I’m trying to ask you out on a date,” He blurts, nose scrunching. “And failing miserably apparently.” 
“Oh!” You feel your face burn hot, yet you couldn’t wipe the smile off your face even if you tried. You’re about to take him up on the offer, but before you can say a word, another voice pops into the conversation. 
“Yes! She says yes! Whatever you’re asking, her answer is yes!” Samira yells through the window enthusiastically, muffled through the glass but still very audible.
Neither you nor Lando can stop the laughs that escape your mouths, especially when you turn around and all three girls are shooting you excited thumbs ups. 
“Guess that’s settled then,” You giggle, turning back to face him. 
“It’s a date.” He pushes forward, catching you by surprise when he presses a soft kiss to your cheek. As cliche as it sounds, the touch of his lips against your skin, although fleeting, sends a flurry of butterflies through your stomach. “I’ll text you later to plan, yeah? Get home safe.” 
He waits for you to pull around the circular driveway, and as his waving form gets smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror, a glimmer of hope worms its way through you. 
In the back of your mind, you know you should keep it in check. This could be totally casual. A short summer fling that won’t hurt anyone no matter how it ends. But maybe, just maybe, it could turn into something more. 
-------
Your schedules don't end up giving you a free afternoon together until a few days later, though you come to realize it only makes you look forward to seeing Lando again even more. 
You're supposed to be meeting him at the local market in the center of town at half past one, but you find yourself there early, wanting to get a lay of the land before he gets there.
Evidently Lando had the same idea, because you spot him within the first few steps into the open air marketplace, squatting next to a stand with crates and buckets of bright flowers. He’s already got a bouquet clutched in his hands, but still he browses through the different bunches. 
“Flowers for Max?” You joke. 
Lando shoots to his feet so fast he nearly hits his head on the lightbulb hanging above, only managing to miss it by mere inches as he startles at the sudden voice. When he realizes it’s just you, he snorts with laughter. “He wishes! They’re for you, actually.” 
“Me?” 
“Yeah, you,” He says teasingly. You don’t even know what to say. Flowers on the first date might be normal, yet nobody’s ever done it for you before. You’re touched, but he must take your silence as something else, because his smile drops the tiniest bit. “Unless you see something you like better? I can still put these back.” 
You study the flowers he’s picked out already. A little on the smaller side, it boasts a beautiful mix of both soft and brighter colors while still being simple—it’s exactly the sort of thing you would’ve chosen if you were buying flowers for yourself. “They’re perfect.” 
He pays for the flowers and passes them over to you with the biggest smile on his face, one that grows even bigger when you tuck them carefully into the crook of your arm after giving the delicate blossoms a sniff. 
You notice the camera hanging around his neck at that moment, despite knowing close to nothing about golf, you do know a thing or two about photography. “Golfer and photographer? Impressive.” 
“Amateur at best.” 
“Oh, I’m sure you're just being modest.” 
“Not even a little bit. I just enjoy taking pictures of things I like.” 
He swings around to face you fully, bringing the camera up to his eye and pausing only a second to make sure you're in focus before snapping a photo of you. The shutter clicks twice before you have the sense to hold up a hand out in front of you, a surprised laugh spilling from your mouth. Even then he grins, takes another one before lowering the camera. "What, you don't like having your photo taken?" 
“I’m just not very photogenic!” 
Lando scoffs immediately, shooting you a pointed look. “That is such a lie.” 
“I probably just broke your fancy expensive camera,” You joke. 
“We’ll just have to wait til I get it developed and see. I think it’ll turn out wonderful.” 
“And if it doesn’t?” 
“I’ll buy you dinner. If I’m right, then…you let me buy you dinner.” 
You let out a noise of surprise. “Well, that doesn’t seem very fair, does it? You’d have to buy me dinner either way.” 
“I can think of worse things than taking a pretty girl out for a nice meal.” His words take you by surprise, but judging by the smug grin on his face, Lando takes pride in eliciting a reaction from you. “Shall we?” And just like that, he’s sauntering off down the path like he didn’t just leave you at a loss for words, pep in his step even as he turns around to shoot you a roguish smile. “You coming or what?” 
You push aside the fluttering in your chest, giving your head an amused shake before catching up with him. It’s cute that he thinks he’s funny. Even cuter that he seems rather eager to take you out on a second date before the first one has even started. 
The two of you wander through the market aimlessly, stopping here and there at various stalls to have a look around. If you had the means, you’d buy everything you see. You wind up picking up some gorgeous looking fruit and a bottle of locally pressed wine, a few small souvenirs for your family back home, but the most important thing you buy isn’t even for you. 
Lando had lingered at a stall selling handmade jewelry early on, seemingly interested in a woven bracelet of blues and whites, but didn't pick it up. Part of you wonders why, but it sparks an idea in your head. 
You tug at Lando’s arm lightly, smiling guiltily when he turns to look at you. “I think I left my phone at that fruit stand a few stalls back.” 
“You’d forget your head if it wasn’t attached to your body, you muppet,” He chides, shaking his head fondly. “C’mon, let’s find it.” 
“No, I can get it. Why don’t you find us something good for lunch? I’m starving.” 
“Are you sure?” Lando cocks his head, shoulder bumping against yours. “I don’t mind.” 
“I’ll be right back,” You promise. To sweeten the deal, you make the bold move of pressing a kiss to his cheek. He freezes under your touch, but you pass it off as him not expecting it and being taken by surprise. “Two minutes, okay? Maybe less.” 
As soon as you confirm he isn’t paying any attention to you, you slip back through the crowd, finding the same stall and buying the bracelet he’d been looking at. You tuck it safely into your pocket, quickly making your way back to Lando before he realizes you’ve been gone long and comes looking for you. 
“All good?” He asks upon noticing you reappear by his side. 
You wiggle your phone in the air. “Never better. What's for lunch?” 
Lando grins happily, reciting the spiel that the very friendly older man at the food stand gave to him when he’d decided on the delicious looking food. Sure, maybe he stumbles over his pronunciation a little bit, but you find his giggled embarrassment sweet. 
You find a semi-secluded bench a little jaunt away to enjoy your food, and you do enjoy it. You think it might be one of the best things you’ve ever had, and when you tell Lando, he looks pleasantly surprised. As you continue to savor every bite, Lando’s eyes light up with amusement, so much so that you wonder what’s suddenly got him all smiling big like this. 
“What?” You say incredulously. 
He gestures to the lower part of his face. “You’ve got a little…” 
Mortified, you mirror his actions on your own face, searching for the food you’ve somehow gotten smudged on your chin. After a few tries that have him shaking his head, you whine, “Help me, please?”, to which he obliges with a soft chuckle. He reaches out, thumb rubbing at the corner of your mouth briefly. 
This moment almost seems too intimate, but then again, so have a lot of moments between the two of you. The way he’s looking at you makes you feel like you’ve still got something on your face, but then his gaze flicks down to your lips again almost imperceptibly, and you have an inkling of what’s about to happen. 
“Did you get it?” You ask softly. You’re not sure why you break the silence, but it's definitely not because you don’t want him to kiss you. If you think about it, you’ve wanted Lando to kiss you this whole time. 
“Yeah. Yeah, I got it," He replies. His hand lingers, long fingers splaying flat under the curve of your jaw now. You surprise yourself by shifting forward slightly, as if encouraging Lando to close the gap. He leans in closer and closer still, and your eyes fall shut on their own accord, heartbeat hammering against your rib cage. 
You nearly melt the moment his lips touch yours, held up only by the firm grasp of his hand cupping your face. It’s a little awkward with the food in between the two of you blocking you from pushing closer to him, but you make it work, reaching over it to wrap your fingers around Lando’s forearm. You feel like you need it to ground yourself, because holy shit, you’re kissing him. 
Well, more like he’s kissing you, because you’re definitely not the one leading the way. Lando kisses like he knows exactly what he’s doing, and judging by how you feel weak in the knees when you’re not even standing, he does know exactly what he’s doing. 
You’re falling, falling, falling, getting lost in him, until— 
“Wait, hang on,” He breathes, pulling away. Your eyes flutter open in an almost dazed sort of way, focusing on him in hopes of finding him in the same state, but all you’re met with is…guilt? Sadness? Shame? Maybe a mixture of everything, you’re not sure. All you know is that it has your heart plummeting in your chest. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” 
Everything hits you at once, and suddenly you’re crashing back down to reality. Lando thinks kissing you was a mistake. You were so sure he liked you back, sure enough to go on a date with him, and now here you are with egg on your face, feeling unbelievably stupid. Hurt. 
“I’m gonna—I have to go,” You mumble, scrambling to your feet. You don’t even have an excuse prepared, you just need to get out of here, get away from Lando before you spontaneously combust from the sheer embarrassment. 
His hand encircles your wrist before you can make it even a step away. 
“No, no, don’t! Please, just let me…let me explain. I promise things will all make sense in a second, if you’ll just hear me out,” He says pleadingly. Despite your better judgment, you sit back down, expression guarded. Lando blows out a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose briefly. “Look, I like you. I really like you, and I wish things were as simple as that, but there’s things I’ve not told you. Things that, if you knew, you might not want to be with me.” 
You squeeze your eyes shut as hard as you can, burying your burning face into your hands with a muffled groan. “Oh my god, you are in the mafia, aren’t you?” 
“The—what?” Lando blurts, sounding wildly confused. “No, I’m not, I’m not in the mafia. Are you mad? I’m a Formula 1 driver!” 
You crack one eye open, then the other. “Formula 1.” You repeat, disbelieving. “Like, the racing thing?”  
He nods enthusiastically, tells you everything—how his childhood dream turned into a career, how he gets to travel all around the world doing what he loves. The fame, the lifestyle, the opportunities he’s worked so hard for, all while sounding entirely humble and grateful for everything and everyone who’ve gotten him to where he is today. 
It’s impressive, to say the least. The fact that he’s still fairly young and has already accomplished more than what some people have in a whole lifetime. Then he gets to how the chaos that doing what he does at the level he does it at wreaks havoc on other parts of his life, and you feel a wave of sympathy roll over you. 
The tradeoff for all that success is not getting to have a normal life in almost every aspect, and given the downward set of his brow as he tells you about it, this isn’t the first time he’s had this conversation with someone. 
“It makes being in a relationship…difficult, is the best way I can describe it. I’m never in one place more than a week most times, and the whole time zones thing makes it harder too. And after these two weeks are up, I’m already off to somewhere else, jumping right back into the second half of the season and hitting the ground running.” 
Realization hits you like a truck at this point, and you have to fight the urge to laugh out loud. Of course Lando is who he is. Of course you had to form a connection with someone with a life as complicated and as far away from your own as possible, someone who couldn’t be in a normal relationship even if he wanted to. 
“I wish it were different, but I just—I wanted you to know what you might be getting into if we…” He trails off, but you know what he means. If we want to get involved with each other. If we want to be together. 
“So like, long distance, but infinitely harder.” You’re doing your best to put a light spin on the massive amount of new information you’ve just acquired, but you’re barely managing to process it all, let alone even think about what it would be like to date someone as well known as Lando. 
“Yeah, something like that,” He says softly, shoulders creeping up towards his ears. “It’s—well, it’s a lot of baggage for anyone to have to deal with. Lots of eyes and ears, pretty public. Not really your cup of tea, I’ve noticed.” 
He’s right. You’ve never been one to enjoy being the center of attention, preferring to fly under the radar. Blend into the background. And you hate to say it, but knowing all of what he’s just told you changes things. You don’t think you can handle being thrust into the public eye, and it makes you feel like the most selfish person in the world to walk away from him just because of who he happens to be. 
Your life would be forever altered, your sense of privacy and security gone, and that isn’t something you want to compromise. You’re comfortable being nobody significant. With Lando, that would change, no matter how many measures you take to make sure it doesn’t. 
As much as you’ve come to like him—and you really like him—it’s just not something you can see yourself being fully okay with. 
“I’m so sorry, Lando,” You say quietly. He just smiles sadly, like he already knew it was coming, and you can't help but think about how many relationships—platonic or romantic—that he's lost out on because of his status. The thought alone makes you feel even worse. “I like you too, but I can’t—I don’t think I can be what you want me to be. It’s not me, it’s not the way I can live my life.” 
“Don’t be sorry. You haven’t got a reason to be,” He murmurs, thumb rubbing across your knuckles comfortingly. “Knew it was too good to be true, didn’t I?” 
“I’m sorry,” You say again, hoping that Lando knows you truly mean it. “I wish it were different, but—”
Lando shakes his head, interrupting before you can grasp for any other ways to apologize. He squeezes your hand reassuringly again. “Hey. It’s alright, I promise. I’d never ask anyone to do something they aren’t comfortable with. Especially not you.” 
Even when he’s sad, he’s still so thoughtful. It would take a different kind of awful monster not to want to be with him. Apparently that monster is you. 
You wish you were someone else, someone who could take huge changes in stride and never miss a step, but you’re not. Someone who knows what they want and goes for it—who knows who they want and doesn’t let anything get in their way. 
Unfortunately, you’re not that kind of person. 
“What do we do now?” 
Lando drops your hand to run his fingers through his curls, down to the back of his neck sheepishly. “Dunno about you, but I’ve—d’you think there’s any chance we can still be friends? I really do enjoy spending time with you lot, we all do.” 
“Friends would be nice,” You say softly. It feels strange to agree with him so wholeheartedly. 
Maybe it’ll be awkward between the two of you, maybe you won’t even be able to sit next to each other with what’s happened today, but you can’t bring yourself to care all that much. The only thought running through your mind is that you don’t want to lose Lando, even as just a friend. 
You’ve gotten attached. 
The bracelet you’d bought Lando burns a hole through your pocket. It would be weird to give it to him now, after you’d just turned him down, but you can’t exactly just return it either. You don’t really want to. 
Maybe it won’t go to him, but you’re sure you’ll find something to do with it someday.
The girls are waiting in the living room when you finally make your way home, gathered on the sofa with identical innocent smiles like you hadn’t seen them with their heads poked through the curtains. Samira bounces off the cushions with what you can only describe as a gleeful cackle to grab your flowers, showing them off to the other two like a game show host before grabbing your hand and dragging you into the center of their blanket pile. 
You know they're expecting good news and you wish you could give it to them, but you can’t. 
“So??? How’d it go?” 
“He got her flowers, obviously it went well!” 
“Okay, spill, now,” Camille presses, easing the bouquet out of Samira’s hands and setting it on the coffee table. “What’s he like, what’d you do—” 
“When’s your second date?” chimes in Maren excitedly. The other two nod their vigorous agreement. 
“Lando’s amazing,” You sigh, letting yourself fall back against the plush pillows. “He’s super sweet and really funny, we walked around and looked at all the vendors, and then we had lunch and talked for ages, and…there won’t be a second date.”
“What? That’s impossible, you guys were like, made for each other!” 
You sigh, rub at a flower petal that’s fallen away from the bouquet. “It’s complicated. I don’t—I’m not ready to get into all of it again this soon, but long story short, our lives are just too different. Being with him would mean compromising things I’m just not ready to lose right now.” 
If any of them wants to push for a better explanation, and you know they do, they refrain from doing so. They know you’ll tell them when you’re ready. 
But even Samira can tell you’re not quite as okay as you insist you are, and she’s been rooting for you extra hard. She leans her head onto your shoulder, squeezes your hand reassuringly. “You did what was best for you, and that’s all that matters.” 
“We agreed to still be friends, so we can still hang out with the guys and stuff like that, but—I mean, yeah, it just didn’t work out.” You don’t think you sound very convincing at all, but it’s the bed you've made, you’ve got to lay in it. “I just don’t really want to talk about it right now, but it's fine. I'm fine.” 
It has to be. You have to be. You’ve made sure of it.
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hypnagogics · 7 months ago
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how soon is now? | part two
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READ THIS FIRST 🇵🇸
previous chapter. series masterlist.
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♡: hallway crush!ellie x uni student!reader
☆: the long-awaited second part of this godforsaken fic (lawd she’s given me trouble). appreciate y'all's patience as always, i'm a chronic procrastinator and perfectionist but what can i do. after this, i'm gonna take a break from this series. not saying i'll never write more, but wanna work on some other stuff for a while. thank you for reading! pretty please don’t hate me or show up at my house waving torches and pitchforks for this ending ok luv u gays in my phone. + a big thank you to @total-dxmure for helping me w/ some ideas for the last little bit!
♧:5.7k word count (lawd)
◇: sfw! miscommunication (sawry). fluffy moments, angst lowkey…both of yall cry at one point or another, reader has anxiety in the last chunk. modern au but joel isn’t alive in this, and they discuss it. maybe some rushed points here and there, i’m not really the proudest of this but needed to finish it anyway. potentially horrendous pacing but ok i think that’s all? idfk i may give y’all a little epilogue eventually, but don't dwell on it for the time being!
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4 months later 
Your friendship with Ellie was evolving wonderfully. You two were studying together frequently, and both your grades in the ghastly astrophysics class increased exponentially. Although that wasn't the only thing that was increasing at a rate too fast to fathom. Your crush on her. It was ripping you apart like wildfire, Ellie was proving herself to be such a wonderful person inside and out, and you were slowly but surely nearing your limit of how much it could build before you burst. A movie spin off of the Savage Starlight series had come to streaming, and Ellie had invited you to her place for a movie night so you two could watch it and discuss if it was a faithful entry in your beloved series or not. 
Dressed in some comfortable pjs and armed with snacks of all kinds, your favorites as well as hers, the time had come and you were at her door. You straighten your posture and put your hair back in place, must look presentable, then knock, knock, knock.
You could hear some faint shuffling behind the door, then a few thudding steps until she opened it for you. She was dressed in an old, worn Nirvana tee, and red checkered pajama pants, damn she looked good, even when she was dressed with less effort than usual. 
Ellie looked so pleased to see you, leaning on the doorframe. Why did she have to look so good all the time? “Hi! I’m so glad you came, ooh this is gonna be so fun.” She invited you in and took the snacks from your arms and placed them inside her room. “Oh yeah, I also put up some decor too so we can get into the Savage Starlight spirit.” Her eyes were wide and twinkling and when she stepped aside to let you see, she really had made her room so welcoming and comfortable.  
The lights were all off save for LEDs around the room’s perimeter set to a dreamy violet hue, sparkly fairy lights draped around the frame of her bed which was set up so cozily. Her laptop propped up on a pillow, the sheets arranged in a nest-like formation with two spaces for each of you. She even had a few dinosaur stuffed animals placed in a row so they could watch too.
You were so flattered she'd do that and make the atmosphere so nice for the two of you, you could just tackle her in a hug and never let go.
The thing is you were scared she'd perceive that as weird and you didn't feel like dying of embarrassment, not today at the very least. Save that for another day, maybe. Oh, how you wanted to squeeze her so bad. Your imagination had to do for now. 
She was standing there so proud of how she arranged her room into a mini theater, and you beamed at her, silently thanking her for making it so dim so she couldn't see your flustered expression in full.
“Ellie this is amazing!!” “You like it?!? These stupid lights kept on falling off but since this is an important occasion for us both I didn't give up. All for our love, Daniela.” She manipulated her voice and waved in the air with two fists, closed her eyes and put her hand over her heart, just being as dorky as ever.
Oh gosh, hopefully it wasn't going to be awkward. Sure, the two of you had grown to be great friends, but were you that close to be just, relaxing in her bed together? As long as your imagination didn't run too wild and you didn't overthink anything, it was going to be a fun time. Just two pals watching their favorite series, nothing more, nothing less.
She threw herself in the mess of comforters with a grunt, and saw you were hesitating. She patted the empty space next to her so you'd join her and the movie night could begin. “C’mere, don't be shy.” Well, no shit you were going to be shy. Suck it up. 
You crawled in next to her, unable to look her in the eyes, while she got everything ready and rubbed her hands together excitedly. “Man, if they do our girl dirty, we’re gonna have to give someone a knuckle sandwich, you with me?” Her jokes and easy going vibes always made her so fun to be around, but unfortunately for you, you fell harder for her every time. “Yeah, Ellie. A knuckle sandwich for all of them.” You retorted with a chuckle. Once both of you were settled, she pressed play and so it began.
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As the movie played, the two of you laughed and debated every plot twist, cursing the directors for not portraying your queen Daniela how she deserves, and snacked on candy until your stomachs hurt. It was going so well, the friendly hang out both of you needed after so many responsibilities in life. An escape. Occasionally sneaking peeks Ellie’s way, she was just so marvelously pretty. The shadows dancing on her features, illuminating her side profile perfectly, her long eyelashes and button nose, who wouldn't get lost in admiring her?
Of course you could never fully relax around her, or forget the crush no matter how hard you tried to push it down and just be friends. Every time she shifted next to you in the bed you felt your heart seize and the butterflies in your stomach turn into hornets. At this rate, they were going to turn into whole birds for fuck’s sake.
Nearing the end of the movie, the two of you were so invested, so captivated in the events, totally spellbound.
But then the film took a more emotional turn that wasn't in the comics. Daniela and her father had an absolutely vicious argument which left the two of you speechless watching it, which luckily got quickly resolved right after the two characters had a near-death experience together.
You weren't one to get emotional over silly, trivial things like fiction, but the way they showed this entire sequence was nothing short of heart-wrenching. You snatched up one of Ellie's patterned pillows and hugged it tightly to your chest, because cuddling her would have been much too bold for the likes of you. But what you’d give to do that instead.
Seems you were not the only one touched by the scene, as you began to hear some light sniffling from next to you. Looking over at Ellie made your heart break further into a million pieces. She looked lost in thought with thin lines of tears streaming down her plump, freckled cheeks. 
You froze for a moment, not knowing the limits of your relationship with her and how you could comfort her best. So you cleared your throat and mumbled, “That was so sad…” You watched as she avoided your gaze and wiped at her face with the collar of her t-shirt, “Yeah, this kind of stuff hits me, feels a little personal y’know.” She has never opened up to you about her struggles before, in the short time you’ve known and gotten close with Ellie, it always seemed like she was there to help you out, not the other way around. This could be your chance to show her that you are there for her as well, and that she can always count on you.
Being curious but at the same time not wishing to pry too much into her private affairs, you quietly asked with the most gentle tone of voice you could muster,” You don’t have to, but I’m here if you ever wanna talk about it, Ellie.” You watched her out of the corner of your eye, anticipating however she reacts.
She stayed quiet for a beat before sighing deeply, and whispered, “We were having a fun time, I really don't wanna be a burden.” Her voice quivered, heavy with emotion, what could possibly be troubling her this much? You wanted to take all her pain and bear it yourself, she didn't deserve any sort of misfortune ever.
“You can tell me, don’t worry about anything, okay? I just want you to be all good.” You were comforting her so smoothly, putting her needs and well-being first as if it was always second nature, as if you two have known each other many lifetimes over, two souls meant to float together through the journey of life. Well okay, that was probably a bit much.
There were a few more seconds of silence as you let the question ring in the air, not wanting to press and jeopardize your cherished friendship with her. 
You continue observing her, almost seeing the gears turning in her mind, the scales of reason tipping to one side then another, as she contemplates whether it’s worth spilling. Eventually, she does.
She roughly rubs her face then pauses the film playing on her laptop, sighs and huffs, before beginning to speak her story, all while looking away from you.
“Okay I don’t like to talk about this kind of stuff, but I trust you. A whole lot.” Your heart fluttered and face heated up at her comment, but you ignored it because there was something much more important on the table now. She continues, speaking quietly but quickly to get it over with. 
“So, when I was a kid, I was an orphan and to be honest I don’t really remember my early childhood much at all, but when I was 14 my adoptive dad, Joel, took me in. And it’s been just us since then.” She stops to take a breath, then resumes reluctantly. “And well, we’ve had a pretty rocky relationship for a good chunk of these years, I never knew how to express my gratitude to him, y’know, for basically saving my life, numerous times at that. He was always my rock, and I appreciate him every day. He taught me so many things, and I don’t know what I would’ve done if he hadn’t come around. I was pretty hard to deal with back then.” She reminisces with an exhale of air, and you see her eyes refill with tears. “But I’m really bad at expressing that, and will kinda, lash out I guess when I’m met with kindness or tricky situations.” 
You nod, listening patiently, and place your hand on her shoulder ever so gently, as a result making her raise her head to give you a small smile. 
Ellie chuckled deeply, it almost sounded forced, then started to slowly wrap up her story. “And it seems that scene kinda hit me, because the wounds are still raw, or whatever.” 
She sniffles again but doesn't respond, so you delicately inquire, “What do you mean?”
“He died last year.” Oof.
“Oh my, Ellie, I’m so sorry, are you-” She interrupts your condolences. “No need for that, I’m fine. Well, taking it day by day y’know. In the beginning it was really tough, I was angry at everything but most at myself for being such a jerk, and now I can't turn back time and tell him all I wanted to.” While you take a moment to think about what to say, she hums to herself and remarks, “That actually felt good to get off my chest, I haven't told anyone about it.” She lowers her voice so it’s barely a whisper. “Didn't have who to tell.”
“Sure you're okay? I'm always here for you.” You find your voice back to soothe her some more, to which she smiles at you again, only this time it actually seems genuine. There's definitely a lot of pain behind it, but the relief that she doesn't have to deal with the burden alone was evident on her face. 
“Yeah, thanks. I guess I hadn’t processed anything, and that part of the movie made it all come out, damn I hate emotions sometimes. But I appreciate you being here for me. You're really easy to talk to, and I feel better now.” 
And you would've never in a trillion years anticipated what her next move was going to be, you were so caught off guard, the realization lagged and it didn't immediately register. 
She moved to sit on her knees in front of you, then threw her arms around your torso in a tight embrace. She hugged you. Clutched you so firmly against her own body, her strong hands landing in the middle of your back, where she rubbed in a circle. She smelled so nice, and was as warm as one of her heated stuffed animals. 
Due to the surprising nature of the motion you let out a dumbfounded gasp, then returned the hug allowing yourself to rest your head on her shoulder. You wanted to stay like this forever, until the end of time, it felt nicer than you could've ever imagined.
The thought crossed your mind that she could feel the buzz pulsating through your body, you swore your heart was slamming against your ribcage so hard it was going to grow wings and simply fly right out of your chest, and join hands with hers.
While you were occupied with the way she felt against you, so close like this, chest against chest, and how your cheeks blazed with an inferno hotter than a thousand suns, you heard her grumble against your ear. “Not gonna make that same mistake again, and from now on, I'm gonna tell the people I appreciate just how much they matter to me.”
You were much too stunned to speak, but she wasn't. “So thank you again.” She finishes her little speech and pulls away first, but not before giving you one last big squeeze and letting out a noise of contentment as she does so, then shuffles over to her previous spot in the bed. 
Not taking notice of the way you were at a loss for words, or about to set the room on fire with how flustered her actions made you. Her obliviousness was a common theme, it seemed. She clears her throat and claps, grabbing some more candy for herself, then says happily, “We still got the rest of the movie left, then we can do whatever after. I really wanna know how this ends.”
Naturally, your head is spinning, but you were too caught up in your thoughts to continue paying attention to the movie as much as you were before.
You felt awful for her, yet somehow, felt as if your crush on her had quadrupled in size yet again. You saw through the guard she put up, she broke down those walls and opened up to you. You were honored she trusted you so much, and only hoped that would never change. That, coupled with how remarkably good hugs she gave, has led you to the realization that you were properly in love now, things had gotten real. This was trouble. You vowed to always be there for her for whatever she could ever need, you'd drop everything to teleport by her side if you could. 
Goodness, what were you possibly going to do now, instead of giving you the ick, or helping you with the task of getting rid of that stupid infatuation you were so plagued by, every experience felt like a deliberate ploy to just make you fall even further for her. You couldn't help but wonder just how much love a person can feel for someone, because it only continued to grow. 
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A couple days later.
Sitting in the cozy campus cafe, you were revising all your coursework. It was giving you a massive headache, but the warm and hazy lighting aided it a touch. The walls had cute plastic vines crawling up and down, and even though there was chatter all around you from the other patrons, it wasn't a distraction and in fact acted as some sort of white noise, everyone was talking in a nicely muted tone, it all blended to create the perfect ambience. 
You waved down the waitress to get yet another cup of coffee, your third one of the night, that’s healthy, before trying to resume with your aggravating studies. 
To your dismay, you've used up all your brain power for the evening, and could not force yourself to continue no matter how hard you tried. Maybe a few moments of peaceful people-watching would get you back on track?
You sip on the hot drink, then lean back against the comfortable booth seat to begin scanning around.
In one corner directly on the opposite side of where you were sitting, there was an elderly couple. They looked so in love, dressed in matching outfits, feeding each other as they shared a dessert, holding hands and conversing with a hushed tone, nodding and looking into each other's twinkling eyes. So cute, you hoped that was going to be you in the future. 
Moving your line of sight to watch beside the couple, there was another student, their books and computer were scattered across the wooden table, piles of pens and pencil cases near falling over. They seemed to have fallen asleep, unmoving with their head laid tiredly across their crossed arms. The sight made you chuckle out of familiarity, you really felt for them, studies were hard. 
But then a sound caught your attention. A bright, husky giggle fought its way over the ambience, reminiscent of a certain someone. 
Your heart jumped, your ears perked up and you immediately became insistent on scouting her out among the patrons, this was a necessary mission. 
Feeling highly nervous and antsy, you try to drown out the noise and focus on where she could be, and quickly enough, you find her.
Ellie in her natural habitat, she was so mesmerizing. Sitting far away from you where you could get a good view and hear snippets of conversation if you focused hard enough, but not close enough where she would notice your shameless gawking. She was sitting with a group of a handful of her friends, who all appeared to be gossiping and laughing with each other, you couldn't tear your eyes away.
Her smile was gorgeous, and you knew that, but there was something about just being a spectator which fascinated you, you could stare at her all day. Her energy lit up the entire room, and made your heart race.
Snapping out of your trance and trying to not be so obvious with your staring, you tried to look occupied, tried reorganizing your notes while still keeping an ear out to listen. Occasionally glancing over as  well. Yes, it's true that eavesdropping is wrong, but you couldn't help yourself. Anyone would do the same, right?
The group's passionate discussion was making you extremely curious however, and you strained to hear what they were talking about. Among the muffled chatter, you heard a woman’s voice say the word crush, then an outburst of laughter, the loudest guffaw from Ellie herself. 
You felt the budding panic start to form in your chest momentarily, but swallowed the lump forming in your throat and took a sharp intake of breath to calm yourself at once. They could be talking about anything, there's no need to jump to conclusions just yet. Fumbling around your bag for your headphones to listen to some of the song recommendations Ellie had given you, you’re led to discover that they are, in fact, dead. Of course. 
Despite any and all wishes to stop eavesdropping on them and mind your own business and abide by what they say, ignorance is bliss, you simply couldn't. She was too damn captivating. Like a painting in a museum, like a statue at a town’s center, one that people stopped in their tracks to admire. 
The way her eyes sparkled and gleamed under the warm lighting, her cheeks tinted a faint rosy hue from the exertion of laughing so hard, her sweet smile. She was too perfect. God, you hated crushes, being infatuated with someone to this degree couldn't be healthy. But what could you do? Just look at this angel.
Fidgeting nervously while still being entranced by the group of friends, you heard a man’s voice say the words “there’s no way”, followed by Ellie howling even harder than she had the whole time you've been watching them, and punch him forcefully on the shoulder. 
The curiosity was going to swallow you whole, it was like a car crash you couldn't look away from. You felt your palms begin to tremble and sweat with worry, and anxious assumptions of all kinds running through your mind, were they talking about you? No, they couldn't be, you're just overthinking it. Relax, relax, relax.
You tried your hardest to control your breathing and soothe your spinning mind so you wouldn't spiral, until you heard something that absolutely shook you to your core.
The same woman from before, not Ellie, in a highly teasing tone of voice said your name.
You felt frozen, this couldn't be happening. All your worst fears were coming true at this very moment. You had to get out of there right away, this was too much to bear. Curiosity really did kill the cat didn't it, you wished you didn't comply with the morbid desire to know everything. 
Panic-stricken like a deer in headlights, near hyperventilating at this point, the final straw was all three of them erupting into laughter simultaneously, with Ellie through gasps, going "oh come onnnn”.
Yeah that was it. Hot tears started pricking your eyes and you vigorously blinked them away before they started streaming down your face, as if you needed to be humiliated even more. You felt sadded, torn apart, betrayed. Sick to your stomach too. This time, for once, you really thought you had something going for you. From your perspective, albeit through rose-colored glasses, you were convinced she was being genuine with you all this time. How could you not be? 
The late night study sessions, the air thick with tension, the conversations draped in a sleep-deprived haze, the walks to class together, the first fated interaction, the looks you two shared from across the huge lecture hall; the looks where you two just knew when to share a glance, was all of that fake? Was she leading you on purposefully because her friends thought it was funny, that you were a joke?
The tears threatened to spill and your stomach twisted painfully with the world-shattering realizations you were just served with, and you angrily shoved your belongings in your bag.
You were too caught up in your panicked frenzy to notice how disruptive you were actually being, your textbooks thumping and keychains jingling, but frankly didn't care enough to meet the numerous pairs of eyes observing your misfortune. Who could blame you, your whole world and everything you've known just crumbled before you. 
You slung your bag over your shoulder noisily as a choked sob made its way up your throat, then speed-walked out of that cafe. You were never going to be able to go in there again unfortunately, shame, their pastries were so good.
Right as you tried to step through the door it got stuck, because the universe was being really nice to you today, and as you tugged on it to get it to open, you heard the friends lower their voices, but you could still make out a jumble of hushed words sounding something like, “oh no, is that…” Great, great, fucking great. The only solution to this was to change your name and ride up to Seattle for goodness’ sake, maybe throw yourself into a volcano as well just because. 
Finally the door swung open after what felt like eons, and you stumbled outside into the chilly autumn air, feeling goosebumps spring up all over. Where you were going, you didn't really know. This cafe was new, so it would take some time to figure out navigation so you stood dumbly in the middle of the front lawn as you tried to orient yourself.
Once you think you've got it, you start your agonizing trek back to your little room, screaming inside of your head, until you're harshly yanked back mid-footstep by a vice grip on your arm. What the fuck was it now. 
Ellie. The sight of her only made your tears increase in quantity and the emotion in your chest tighten. She looked a little disheveled, her eyes round like saucers, and she was gripping onto your arm so hard as if you were going to run away. You wanted to, but she still had a magnetic hold on you, even after all that turmoil. 
Talking was painful with how much you were trying to keep a hold of yourself, but you managed out a choked, “Ellie, what?” 
She looked befuddled, shaking her head ever so slightly and scrunching up her eyebrows, her gaze boring right into yours and following whenever you tried to break it and look elsewhere. Her hold on your arm softens, and moves to rest on your shoulder. “What do you mean what? You ran outta there like you were chased by a lunatic or something, what the fuck happened?”
Her tone startled you a little, why did she care so much? Noticing you jolt, she sighs and mellows her speech. “Sorry, what I mean to say is, I'm worried. Are you okay?” 
You worried her? Heat rushed to your cheeks as you fought to break the increasingly uncomfortable eye contact, and all you could do was shrug. Your lip started quivering and you were losing the fight of keeping your composure, how wonderful. Despite everything she was being so sweet, way too sweet. You felt helpless at this point. 
The words started pouring out of your mouth like a waterfall, you were properly sobbing now, falling apart and hiccuping as months and months of emotion spilled over. 
You were blabbering about how you loved the friendship you formed with her, but how hurt you felt that she’d laugh about you, every possible insecurity just tumbled out of your lips, as you wiped at your teary face and runny nose and glanced at Ellie ever so often. 
She let you talk for a bit until she saw you get even more upset, that's when she got a step closer to you, squeezed both your shoulders gently and kept a stern tone of voice to get your attention.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay, slow down, I don't know what you're saying.” But you couldn't stop crying. Bottling up emotions was definitely a bad idea, because they were bound to burst sooner or later and unfortunately, you reached the breaking point. Sucking in some unsteady breaths as an attempt to regulate yourself, she was watching you patiently yet still cautiously. 
Your voice was weak and shaky, but you were slowly feeling a little better. For the first time during this interaction, you meet her eyes. Why was she always so pretty? She was sculpted just to spite you, you were convinced. Tears welled up in your eyes once more, but you blinked them away. “Um…Ellie…” She nodded expectantly, wanting to know what was wrong. But you could not complete your sentence as yet another bout of ache washed over you.
To snap you out of it once and for all, Ellie grabbed your face. The sheer disbelief of her action was enough to stop your tears luckily, and she held your gaze while she used her thumb to swipe at the stray teardrops adorning your cheekbones. You wanted to die, what was going on?
Once your panic was replaced with fluster and stupefaction, she let you go, but was still standing really close to you. You felt jittery from it all, nervous, embarrassed and in love and everything under the sun all at the same time. You stared at her, then looked away, then looked at her plump pink lips which were set in a questioning pout, then back up to her sympathetic greener-than-grass eyes, fuck, fuck, fuck. The intensity of the situation had caused any sense of judgment or critical thinking to long, long gone, and so your body moved on its own and before you had a chance to form a solid thought or process what you were doing.
Smooch.
You kissed her. 
Mouths colliding like magnets as you held onto the sides of her face, fireworks igniting in every single part of your body. Cradling her jaw as you closed the space between you two, the hurricane of emotion coursing through your veins as your lips caressed hers, and time felt like it had stopped. The months and months of excruciating pining had all led up to this very moment. 
She instinctively kissed you back, you felt her breaths fanning your face. You were about to ascend to another dimension. Lingering against her for a little longer, you forced yourself to regretfully pull away, and laughed loudly at her state now. 
Her lips were parted and she was gawking at you, you had broken her completely. Your own heart was working overtime, you were panting from the adrenaline of the situation, and could only hear the blood rushing in your ears. 
She seemed to be in a coma, doing nothing but staring and breathing. You punched her arm playfully, your voice breaking.
“I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU, YOU FUCKING IDIOT.” 
An frustrated confession tore itself from your throat, even the world's strongest iron bars couldn't contain it. You wiped at your face with your sleeves, a sad attempt to clear it of the residual salty tears that never once stopped their journey out of your eyes.
The sadness had left you, and you felt lighter now, truthfully. Had no idea how you would ever face her again after all this, but at least the cat was out of the bag and you had gotten that off of your chest. You both stood there in silence, now what was wrong with her? What a dork. Sucking on your teeth and kicking a pebble on the ground you admitted finally, “So, yeah. That's what's been troubling me, I guess.” 
Her pupils were dilated and huge, as she scanned all over your features, her mouth opening and closing as if she was having an internal battle of what to say. She stood there almost appearing miles more shocked than you somehow, she looked as if she was going to have a heart attack and die on you, you found it funny, but concerning at the same time. 
You watched her for a moment more, before accepting your disappointing fate and bidding her a goodbye. You cleared your throat. “Okay then. Cya in class. Bye.” You turned on your heel and began the walk back to your room, but this time for real, and didn't look back at her. Even if you wanted to, you couldn't, you wanted to leave this whole fiasco in the past. That chapter was closed, it seemed. 
The only thing left to do now was call your bestie, Abby. She has been your cheerleader through this whole thing, through all this time, gave you advice and brought you back to Earth, and you needed her support now more than ever. 
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Right after you reached your dorm she was there in no time at all, after receiving your distress call she scrambled into action, with chocolates and boxed wine in hand. Maybe you should just date her instead at this point. Who else was left for you?
You talked and talked and talked to her about everything for so long, talking the night away just like old times, and she sat and listened to your every word, patted your back reassuringly as you weeped into her shoulder, then tucked you into bed at the end of it all. She left only when she was sure you'd relaxed fully.
You didn't fall asleep quite yet, and stayed awake thinking, pondering life and staring up at your ceiling. It turns out angrily confessing to the girl you've been infatuated with forever by impulsively kissing her and letting the whole campus know it was a tiring thing after all. You really did cause a bit of a scene, when you thought about it in hindsight.
But what was this all like from Ellie's perspective? You wished you could know what she thought, or at least gotten some sort of formal response. Her friend storms out of a cafe, kisses her and screams she's in love with her? It's certainly understandable she'd feel a little lost, or under great pressure to give you an answer. Her reaction did make sense though, after being met with such a shocking revelation. Wow, now that you were really thinking about it, she still did not know why you ran out of the cafe like that. You wished you could turn back time and redo this day, shame that wasn't possible. Were you two ever going to have a discussion about this, or had you just lost a friend for life. Oh no, you pushed that thought away as quickly as it appeared, you didn't have an ounce of energy left over to dwell on it.
You'd work out what you were going to face her next later, a very well-deserved visit to dreamland was way overdue. You felt your eyelids grow heavy and your breathing slow, so you turned on your side and snuggled into your bed, eventually falling into a deep, deep sleep.
Meanwhile on your bedside table:
Bzz, bzz, bzz. 
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writingwithciara · 4 months ago
Text
broken legos -matt sturniolo-
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summary: matt and y/n are both lego lovers so every month, they buy a set to work on together. it’s become such a normal part of matt’s routine that he doesn’t know what to do when y/n’s attention and time is turned elsewhere
word count: 5.1k
pairings: matt sturniolo x best friend reader, chris sturniolo x platonic reader
notes: i love how much matt likes legos and since he's just the cutest, i had to write this for him.
masterlist
y/n and matt weren’t really friends until the triplets 11th birthday. she attended their party only because they had invited everyone in their classes and because her mom was good friends with mary lou.
her mom had picked out an individual present for each of them. they each got a different lego set so when the boys unwrapped their gifts, y/n’s eyes widened and she looked at her mom.
“how come i can never get a lego set, mom?” she pouted.
“because, sweetheart. you never ask for one.”
“you can help me with mine if you want.” matt suggested shyly. he smiled at her so kindly and y/n found herself wondering how she had never really wanted to be friends with him in the first place.
“okay. deal.” y/n returned the smile as both her mother and mary lou beamed with pride. they were finally getting what they wanted. their kids hanging out together.
they got lego sets on their birthday every year and y/n would work with matt to put them together. what started off as an annual thing, quickly turned into a monthly thing for the two of them.
the triplets had just turned 20 & y/n bought matt a ginormous harry potter lego collection that was surely going to take up a majority of their time.
matt was excited for it. maybe even more so than y/n because over their 9 years of friendship, he had developed feelings for his best friend. he knew it wasn’t right to have the feelings but there was nothing he could do about them. their time together became special to him and he cherished every second he got to spend with her.
they immediately began working their way through the diagon alley sets and the process was about to start on the hogwarts castle.
y/n clicked the last two bricks for the gringotts bank together and looked at her creation.
“it looks so perfect. don’t you think?”
“i agree, y/n/n. you killed it.”
“no, we did it together. as a team.”
“we make an incredible team, don’t we?”
“yeah. we sure do.” y/n smiled and looked at the box that contained to castle. “how long do you think that things going to take us?”
“not too long hopefully. i wanna display it and feel proud of something for once.”
“matt, you’re a youtube star. you should be proud of all the hard work you’ve put into this career.”
“i am proud of it. but sometimes, it lacks a certain feeling. i love my fans to death but it gets overwhelming and the only way i find any escape is the time i spend with you putting lego sets together.”
“i understand that feeling all too well, matthew.” she looked at her phone to check the time. “i should be headed out soon. i have to work tomorrow and the commute is going to kill me so i need some rest.”
“why don’t you stay here tonight? i can drive you in the morning.”
“thats sweet, matt. but no. thanks for the offer but i’m fine going home now.” she smiled and stood up. matt followed her to the kitchen.
“i’m serious. we live closer to where you work so it wouldn’t take as long to get there.” he looked at her. “do you just not want to spend time with me anymore?”
“what? no. i will never feel that way about you. you know that.”
“no, i know. it’s a stupid question anyway.”
“i do want to spend time with you. i always do. it’s my favorite thing to do. but if i keep spending nights here, someone’s gonna notice and your fans will freak out and jump to conclusions.”
“yeah i guess you’re right.” he sighed. “but please? just for tonight? i can tell you’re tired and i don’t want you driving home like that. don’t know what i would do if something bad happened to you.”
“okay. i’ll stay. but only for tonight. and only because you said please.”
“that makes me feel so much better.” matt smiled. "you can take the bed and i’ll sleep out on the couch.”
“don’t be ridiculous. your bed is big enough. it’s always been big enough for the both of us. you’re sleeping in here with me.”
“well if you insist.” matt didn’t put up much of a fight. he knew she was going to make him sleep in the bed with her.
“i’m gonna go change into some comfier clothes then. see you in about 10.” y/n grabbed a pair of sweatpants and one of matt’s old t-shirts then went to the bathroom. matt quickly changed then sat in his computer chair to wait. when she came out, they both got under the covers and went to bed.
matt waited until he knew she was dead asleep before grabbing his pillow and going out to the couch. he knew she’d be upset but he could handle that. what he couldn’t handle was the warm feeling rising in his chest.
he had convinced himself that his feelings were just those of a little crush. but the more time he spent with her, the stronger they got. he had known her his whole life and despite having only been friends for 9 years, every time they talked, he was finding something new about her that he liked. he’d been trying to think less about her but it was impossible. so he started distancing himself a little.
to say y/n was upset with the distance would be an understatement. her heart was breaking. after a week, she went to chris to see if he knew anything.
“i actually have no idea why he’s being so moody lately. maybe he was talking to a girl who only wanted to use him and he doesn’t want to tell us because he’s ashamed or something.”
“that’s horrible, chris. do you think that’s what really happened?” y/n could feel her heart breaking at the thought of someone hurting matt in any way.
“i doubt that’s what happened, but there’s so many possibilities as to why he’s distancing himself from everyone.”
“yeah i guess.” y/n sighed and set the lego box on the kitchen table. “we were supposed to start this lego set this weekend but he hasn’t been talking to me so i guess i’ll have to do it by myself.”
“wait. i can help you if you want.”
“that’s nice of you, chris. but you don’t have to make up for your brothers absence in my life.”
“hey, you’re my friend too. in fact, you were my friend first actually. so i would love to start hanging out with you again.”
“okay fair point.” y/n looked from the set to chris, contemplating on his offer. “yeah. let’s do it.”
“cool. can’t wait to start.”
“wanna start tonight?”
“yeah sure.” chris smiled. “wait, i can’t tonight. we’re filming a video tonight.”
“oh. tomorrow then?”
“we could actually start tonight if you don’t mind hanging around until we finish filming.”
“you doing a car video or one in the kitchen?”
“kitchen.”
“then can i chill in your room while you film it?”
“why don’t you sit behind the camera and be like an assistant?”
“i’ve never done that before. what will i have to do?”
“you’ll just have to hand us things when we need them. and don’t worry about being on camera. i’ll have nick edit you out.”
“thanks chris. i appreciate it.” she looked around the room. “are the boys even home?”
“no. matt took nick to pick up supplies for the video.”
“why didn’t you go with them? you always do.”
“i had a feeling you’d be stopping by so i figured i’d stay home. didn’t want to miss my opportunity to see you.”
“although you weren’t the triplet i was hoping to talk to, i’m glad you were here.”
“i’m here whenever you need someone to talk to.”
“i appreciate that. thanks, christopher.”
“chris, we’re home!” nick called from the garage. “come help with the stuff.”
“one sec!” he yelled back and turned to y/n. “be right back.” he was gone before she could reply. seconds later, matt was coming up the stairs. he noticed her sitting at the table and stopped in front of the stairs. nick bumped into him and almost fell down the stairs. but once nick saw y/n too, he understood.
“matt, what the fuck? stop acting so weird. she’s your best friend, for crying out loud.” he whispered to his brother.
“just trying to figure out what she’s doing here.” matt replied, rather loudly, causing y/n’s head to shoot up. she noticed matt and sighed.
of course he would make that comment, she thought.
chris heard what matt said and pushed past his brothers to sit next to y/n.
“i invited her here to work on this lego set after we’re done filming tonight. speaking of which, she’s going to be our off camera assistant for the video. so if you have a problem with her being here, i suggest you speak up. or don’t. because she’s staying whether you like it or not.”
“i’m cool with it. it’s not a bad idea to have someone helping out off camera every once in a while.”
“sure. whatever works.” matt waved his hand around and retreated to his room. nick turned to his friend and shook his head.
“please excuse him. he’s been moody all day.”
“kid needs some action. let’s be real.”
“we could probably arrange something.” y/n scrolled through her phone, only half paying attention to the conversation. when she looked up, chris raised his eyebrow. “what? he clearly hasn’t been laid in a while so maybe we should find him someone.”
“i understood what you meant. but i never imagined the suggestion coming from you.” nick chuckled.
“i’m full of surprises.”
“alright. let’s get this video over with.” matt walked out of his room and stood at the kitchen table. he eyed chris and y/n who were conversing in a tone nobody else could hear. she glanced at matt then laughed at what chris said before the two of them were joining matt and nick in the kitchen.
y/n hit the record button as instructed and chris began introducing the video. she watched as the boys each said what they were going to do for the video. matt’s eyes lit up with excitement when he was describing his portion of the video and for a second, it made y/n’s heart melt. until he made eye contact with her and rolled his eyes. whatever she was feeling for matt was quick to disappear.
after the video was filmed, matt headed back to his room and nick went to his. y/n sat with chris at the table as they began the lego set.
“so, do you think matt’s problem is that he hasn’t fucked anybody lately and it’s just built up aggression?”
“that’s one way to put it. but yeah. it all adds up.” chris was focused on the section of the set he was tasked with assembling. his tongue darted in and out as he searched for each piece.
“i guess so.” y/n glanced behind chris at the hallway that went to matt’s bedroom. she prayed he would walk out at that very moment and everything between them would be fixed. but that didn’t happen.
over the next few hours, chris was focused more on the task at hand than y/n was so when he fell asleep at the table, she wasn’t surprised.
“chris, i think you need some rest.” she giggled at his half asleep response as he swatted her hand away.
“five more minutes. i want to get this part done.” he held the pieces up to show her what was left. she looked down at the diagram and smiled.
“that part is finished, chrissy. looks amazing. you did good.”
“thank you.”
“do you want to head to bed now?”
“will you be joining me?”
“i gotta clean up a bit but i’ll be down there in a few minutes, okay?”
“yay.” chris stood up and pulled the lego piece from his cheek. he nearly tripped down the stairs and when he got to his room, he was out like a light.
y/n on the other hand was still very much awake. as she cleaned up their work area, she couldn’t help but glance towards matt’s room. her hope was shrinking. all she wanted was to confront him and ask why he was being such an ass lately. she wanted to yell at him for breaking her heart. but she knew that if she saw him, she would crumble. no yelling would take place on her end. and at this point, she didn’t even care if he yelled at her. she just wanted to see him.
she had put the lego pieces into their designated bin and set the already assembled parts off to the side. just as she was about to head down to chris’ room, she heard a door open and footsteps entered the kitchen. she turned around and saw matt at the refrigerator. his back was turned so he didn’t notice her standing there.
“matthew bernard, we need to talk.”
“no we don’t.” he shook his head, grabbed his root beer and headed back towards his room. y/n was not about to let him go without a fight. she immediately followed and just as matt was about to get comfy at his computer, she pushed the door open and stomped inside.
“you are not pulling this shit with me, matt. it’s complete bullshit.”
“god, do you ever mind your own business?” he set his can down and rolled his eyes. “i don’t owe you anything.”
“as your best friend, i think your absence needs to be explained.”
“we can’t be friends anymore. there’s your explanation.”
“not good enough.” she sat on the edge of his bed and stared at him before averting her gaze and fiddling with her fingers. “why don’t you want to be friends anymore? did i do something wrong?”
“yes. now please leave me alone. i’m tired.”
“okay.” y/n sighed and left his room without putting up more of a fight. matt sighed and leaned back in his chair. it was killing him to hurt her this way but he had to do it. his feelings weren’t reciprocated and he needed to distance himself, whatever it took.
the next morning, y/n was quiet throughout breakfast, which was unusual to chris. she was normally a yapper like he was but when she responded to his cheery good morning with a slight head nod, he knew something was up. and he knew exactly what caused it. or more specifically, who caused her to go silent.
when they were finally alone, y/n broke down and told chris everything. she didn’t want him to be mad at matt so when she explained it all, it took all of her strength to keep him from confronting matt.
“please don’t. it’s not worth it.”
“bullshit it’s not. he’s ruining the most amazing friendship for something so stupid. he didn’t even tell you what you happened to do to cause this sudden change so he doesn’t get to be protected by you anymore. i have to kick his ass.”
“chris, please?”
“ugh, fine. but i don’t like this. you used to be so happy and calm. but now you’re the complete opposite. it changed overnight and i’m not happy about it.”
“i’ll be fine. i still have you and nick.” she smiled at her best friend. it was only a half smile. the one where chris could tell she didn’t want to do it. but he put his arm around her and smiled back.
“i’m gonna make you feel better.”
“and how do you plan on doing that, christopher?”
“by taking you to get lunch. your favorite.”
“you can’t drive, moron. but i appreciate the thought.”
“damn. what can we do that’s close to the house?”
“can we continue the lego set? we were getting so far before someone passed out.”
“hey, i was working really hard.”
“i know. you worked yourself into a deep sleep, darling.”
“if that’s what will make you happy, then let’s go finish the set.”
“yay.” y/n clapped her hands together and ran upstairs. chris chuckled and followed behind her.
“i’ll order your favorite food for lunch.” he pulled out her chair for her then sat next to her with a smile.
“chris, you don’t have to.”
“i know. but you’re my best friend and i love making you happy because i love you.”
“i love you too.”
and they both meant it. not romantically of course. but they both knew that their bond was unbreakable, even more so now than it had ever been.
matt walked out of his room when he heard y/n giggling. he didn’t expect to see y/n leaning her head on chris’ shoulder. it bothered him but there was nothing he could do about it. instead, he cleared his throat to make his presence known. y/n was the first to turn.
“oh. it’s just you. what do you want?”
“you to leave.” matt replied rather quickly, like he had been storing that answer away for this specific moment, causing y/n to stare at him in shock.
“fuck you, matt.” y/n looked at chris before sliding her chair away from the table. “i’m sorry, chris. but i can’t do this anymore.” she grabbed her phone and walked out the front door.
“what the fuck, matt?!?!” chris yelled at his brother before running after y/n.
matt watched them disappear and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. nick appeared seconds later and gave matt a look.
“what is wrong with you?” he didn’t even have to ask what happened. he heard the majority of it. “if that’s how you treat women, it’s no wonder you’re single.”
“hey, just back off. i need some space away from her.”
“and instead of telling her, like an adult, you just stopped talking to her entirely? except when you do actually speak to her, you’re the biggest asshole in the planet.” nick shook his head. “why do you need the space anyway?”
“it’s complicated, nick.” matt collapsed on the couch and took a breath before resting his head in his hands. “i’m in love with her.” for the first time since matt realized how he felt, the revelation felt real. someone else was now aware of the feelings.
“then tell her, you fucking dumbass. this isn’t healthy. for either of you. you’re breaking more hearts than needed.”
“i can’t tell her. she’s my best friend.”
“correction. she was your best friend, up until about a week ago, when you became a complete dickhead. just fucking talk to her.”
“i just can’t. it’s better this way.”
“for who, matt? for who?” nick slapped his brothers shoulder and returned to his room, leaving matt alone.
outside, y/n made it halfway down the street before chris caught up to her. when he was beside her, she slowed her pace and looked at her feet.
“i’m sorry for leaving like that, chris. i just can’t get it through my head that i was best friends with someone for 9 years and now it’s just all gone to shit.” she kicked a stone in her path and turned to enter the park. she sat on one swing while chris sat next to her on the other. “i just don’t understand what i even did for him to be acting this way, you know? if i had any idea, it might take the weight off my shoulders. but either way, it sucks.”
“yeah. i know.” chris looked over at her and sighed. “i wish things were different.”
“why couldn’t i have fallen in love with you instead? we have so much more in common and you’re actually nice to me. you care about me and matt does not.”
“you love him?” chris’ eyes widened at his best friends revelation. y/n froze for a brief moment before making the swing move side to side.
“yeah, i guess i do. and part of me just wants to yell at him and tell him he’s breaking my heart and the other part just wants to yell at him. which would be fine but i know i could never yell at him. it sucks.”
“i understand. it’s confusing, but i think i get it. and if we loved each other, then life would be simpler.”
“life is never simple for me. it’s like the universe is telling me i’m never meant to be happy.”
“why don’t you try telling matt how you feel? maybe he feels the same.”
“um, did you miss the part where i said the universe doesn’t want me to be happy? because in a perfect world, matt would definitely have feelings for me.”
“you guys are so similar and the fact that neither of you has realized that the other one is in love with you, is ridiculous. i mean, it’s pretty obvious how much you guys truly love each other.”
“i don’t think it’s-“
“oh please. the stares, the fact you’re together 24/7, the inside jokes, the way you blush when he even acknowledges you. the constant teasing. the hand holding in public so y’all don’t get separated from each other. you guys are like the little 4x1 flat lego bricks.”
“come again?”
“you’re good on your own but when you’re attached together, it’s hard to pull you apart.”
“when did you become so wise, christopher?”
“i’ve always been wise. but for matters of the heart, i’m an expert.”
“says the guy who’s never had a girlfriend before.”
“i don’t want to commit to someone if they’re not gonna stick around. i want it to be real.”
“yeah i get that. but thank you for this talk. maybe i’ll talk to matt when i’m over next time.”
“why not stay tonight? we still have to finish that lego set.”
“i’m not ready to see matt.” she sighed. “but if we can do it in your room, i would consider staying tonight.”
“you got yourself a deal. and you can even have my bed tonight.”
“such a gentleman, christopher.” y/n stood from her swing and pulled chris up. “let’s go.”
when they got back home, matt was nowhere to be found. it was like y/n’s prayers had been answered.
they quickly got to work on finishing their lego set. chris played some quiet music in the background and helped put the finishing touches on the set. when it was finished, y/n smiled widely.
“thank you for this, chris.”
“it was my pleasure. and i know i wasn’t the triplet you pictured while working on this set, but i’m glad you let me help.”
“i’d pick you any day.” she patted his knee and stood up to stretch. “i’m gonna go get some snacks from the kitchen. want anything?”
“pepsi of course.”
“should’ve known.” she playfully shook her head and walked up to the kitchen. nick was in the living room and when he saw her, he smiled.
"hey. what are you up to?"
"just grabbing some snacks for chris and i. what are you up to?" she opened the fridge and grabbed the drinks before going to the pantry and looking through the snacks.
"matt said something to me earlier and i've been thinking about it for a few hours."
"what did he tell you?"
"i think that's something he needs to tell you himself."
"that would be easy if he was actually talking to me instead of being an asshole." y/n set the snacks on the counter and turned towards the living room. it was then that she noticed the flowers on the table. "what's this?" she walked closer and looked at them. there was a note under the flowers so she picked it up and read it. it was in matt's handwriting.
i know this may be a little too late but i needed to let you know that i am sorry for being so stupid. these are your favorite flowers and i will love you until the very last one dies. i promise.
y/n inspected the flowers and noticed that one of them was made entirely out of legos. "nick, were you aware of this?"
"i wasn't aware that this would be how he was going to tell you. but i knew he loved you." nick stood next to her and smiled. "what do you think?"
"is this why he's been an ass lately? because he loves me?"
"i think so." he put his hand on her shoulder and admired the flowers. "so he loves you. do you love him?"
"i do, actually. but this isn't fair. he can't treat me the way he has been & then try to make things better by giving me a lego flower."
"maybe you guys need to talk. he's in his room." nick nodded his head down the hallway before heading up to his room. y/n glanced at the snacks, then at the hallway that lead to matt's room. she grabbed the lego flower and the note then headed to matt's room. she knocked gently and the door swung open. upon seeing her, matt's gaze softened.
"hey." he looked at her hands and saw the flower. "i see you got the note."
"i did." she walked past matt and sat in his chair while he sat on the edge of his bed. "it's not fair, matt."
"what do you mean?"
"while i appreciate the lego flower, i don't appreciate the fact that you've treated me like crap for a week and thought you could make up for it with the note and the flowers."
"i figured it wouldn't be enough but just so you know, i'm prepared to do whatever it takes to win you back. you being with chris just isn't natural."
"me and chris? is that why you've been upset these past few days? you think i'm with chris?"
"you've been spending so much time with him lately. and you guys have so much chemistry."
"well, that's ridiculous."
"so you're not with chris?"
"no. but i've come to the realization that my life would be easier if i had just fallen in love with him instead of you."
"you fell in love with me? when?"
"like 5 years ago, i think. and it's been torture just being your friend for so long. every time we'd start a new lego set, it was like falling in love with you all over again. your face would light up like a kid in a candy store and i found it so endearing whenever you'd receive a new set."
"if it helps, it's been torture for me too. i've been pretending for years that i had no feelings for you whatsoever. and i realize now that there is absolutely no real excuse for the way i acted recently. but these feelings are fairly new to me. and i thought i had gotten over what i thought was just a crush. but it turns out, i love you. and i'm always going to love you, no matter what. you can stay mad at me and that's fine. because i love you." matt's leg began to bounce as he confessed everything. y/n got up from the chair and sat beside him. "and it's been torture to see you and chris working on lego sets when that was our thing."
"working on lego sets with chris meant nothing to me. sure it was fun and i enjoy spending time with him. but it was nothing compared to doing them with you." y/n placed her hand on his calmly, stopping his leg from shaking. he looked at her and when their eyes met, matt felt like he was on fire. like he was falling in love again.
"can we start over?"
"and erase our entire history? not a chance." y/n smiled. "let's just pretend the last week didn't happen and we can pick up where we left off, if that's okay with you."
"it's more than okay with me." matt chuckled. "just promise me you won't work on anymore lego sets with chris."
"from now on, i will only work on lego sets with the person i love."
"i love you too." matt smiled and placed a soft kiss to her forehead.
"you still have the hogwarts castle? or did you do it yourself?"
"i was hoping to start it with you."
"good. we can start it in the morning."
"why not right now?" matt pouted when y/n stood up.
"because i promised chris snacks and a pepsi. don't want to make him wait any longer for them."
"can't you just deliver them to him then come back? i miss you and i'm sure he'll understand."
"we'll see. but you'll understand if i don't return tonight?"
"of course. chris is important to you and i love that you guys get along so well."
"and i'm sure he'll understand it when i tell him i want to come up here to spend time with you."
"hurry back, love." matt chuckled and watched y/n disappear from his room. she walked into chris' room with the snacks and smiled at him.
"what took you so long?"
"i made up with matt and turns out, he loves me." she couldn't contain the excitement she was feeling.
"i told you he did. and i'm so happy for you." he chuckled and opened his pepsi. "i take it you want to spend time with matt again, right?"
"you're not mad, are you?"
"of course not. you're happy and that makes me happy." chris smiled. "just don't abandon me altogether."
"i promise to make time for you too, chris." she kissed his head and ran back up to matt's room, jumping on his bed. "he understood."
"great. now i can do something i've been wanting to do for months." matt pulled her close and finally kissed her. the feeling of her lips fitting perfectly with his was enough to make him feel like he was dreaming. thankfully, he wasn't. it was real and matt couldn't get enough.
being together was good for the both of them.
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nadvs · 24 days ago
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hii i love your writhing so so so so so much and i was wondering if you could do something a little angsty for basketball rafe at the end of there college days before rafe gets drafted and him and reader fight about ther future like reader is saying your gonna be able to do all this great stuff what am i supposed to do or smth like that 💕💕 ANYWAYS LOVE YOUR WRITTING!!
aw, thank you so much babe 🥹 i love writing about their college days!! i have a blurb here about how they handle him leaving but i haven’t written in detail how the first bad fight about it goes 👀
» au masterlist
when rafe gets the news that he’ll be drafted, she feels guilty for having a sense of worry gnawing at her. she should be overjoyed for her boyfriend, and while she is happy that his career is soaring to such an impressive height, she’s scared of what it means for them.
she still has a year left of college. he’s moving to a city that’s a three-hour flight away. she’s staying put, while his life is changing immensely. in a matter of two weeks, he’ll be gone and things will change.
it’s a cold night when they’re lying in his bed watching tv, the wind rattling the windows. rafe’s one-way flight is in a couple of days. almost everything’s already packed up, the bedroom nearly bare.
underneath the elation of making it professionally, rafe hates that the trade-in for following his dreams is leaving his girl. everyone and everything else will be easy to leave. but not her.
she’s been keeping her emotions under wraps. she feels wrong for hiding them from him, considering they’ve always prided themselves on having an honest relationship, but she doesn’t want to ruin such a big moment for him.
he’s leaning against the bed’s headboard while she rests on his chest. her mind is racing with worries that he’ll find something, or really someone, better than her. nearly six months together feels like a strong enough commitment, a solid enough foundation, but what if it’s not enough?
“what do you think long distance is gonna be like?” rafe mumbles.
they haven’t talked about it. not really. he knows they’re both dreading the conversation. for two people who started a relationship built on directness, they’re great at being in denial.
“i was just thinking about that,” she admits, still blankly staring ahead at the screen. “i don’t know. what do you think?”
rafe’s hand drags up and down her arm. two more days and everything changes. she won’t be a short drive away anymore. her touch, her smell, her everything won’t be accessible. she’ll be reduced to an image on a screen, a voice through a speaker.
“i’m freaked out,” he admits. he’s so afraid of losing her that it hurts. but she stiffens under his touch. she doesn’t agree like he expected.
“are you not confident that we’ll be able to handle it?” she asks.
her mind is a tangled mess. she’s nervous herself, but him being nervous doesn’t feel fair. he’s the one leaving. he’s the one starting a new life. nothing will be changing on her end. everything will be changing on his.
“it’s not that,” rafe says. “stuff will just be… different.”
“of course it will,” she says. she sits up to meet his gaze, her eyes already glossing with tears. “i’ll be stuck here and you’re…”
she shakes her head in frustration.
“what do you mean by freaked out?” she asks tersely.
“i mean that it’s weird that we’re not going to see each other all the time like we do now,” he states. “why are you pissed at me?”
she looks up to the ceiling, exhaling sharply. she hates it, how on edge she’s been, how she can’t just shut her worries up and feel happy for him and be sure they’ll make it.
“i’m not,” she sighs. it’s one of the things she really doesn’t like about her boyfriend. he senses the tiniest bit of frustration and he pulls at it like a string, trying to understand her but in the most pushy way.
“yeah, obviously,” he says sarcastically. her tone is so clearly irritated. what could he have possibly done wrong?
“it’s just that freaked out sounds like…” she begins. “like maybe you don’t think we’ll stay together.”
“when did i say that?” rafe scoffs, pulling his arm off of her.
her heart aches now that his touch is gone. this is how it’s always going to be when he leaves. he won’t be at an arm’s length anymore. he’ll be off in a big city, making money, meeting people more impressive than her, girls prettier than her.
rafe stares down at his lap, clenching his jaw. he doesn’t want to say anything he’ll regret. not when he’s leaving so soon. over the time they’ve been dating, he’s gotten a little better at reigning in his temper.
but this accusatory tone of hers, this implication that he doesn’t care to make this work, stings.
“for fuck’s sake,” he whispers sharply. “i don’t get why you’re mad at me.”
“i hate when you do this,” she says. “don’t say i’m mad when i’m not.”
“you can honestly say you’re not right now?” he meets her eyes. “really?”
she bites her lip. it’s so much more than mad. she’s scared. she’s insecure. she swallows the lump in her throat.
“your new life will be amazing. maybe you’re freaked out because you know you won’t want any part of your old life. including me.”
“wow,” he says with a humorless chuckle. “i…”
rafe trails into silence. he has a reputation for being a dick. he knows that. he’s fine with it. but hearing the girl he’s fallen in love with imply that he’d toss her to the side like that, like he’s heartless, is gut-wrenching.
“what?” she says.
“i can’t believe you,” he says. “i just wanted to talk to you. not get words put in my mouth and fucking fight about it.”
“you’re turning this into a fight, calling me pissed off when i’m not,” she counters.
for once, rafe doesn’t have a rebuttal. he always does. he always has his next words waiting in his throat during an argument, but this… this is too much. he started an innocent conversation about how he feels. and it turned into this.
“i don’t know what you want me to say,” he mutters.
a tear finally falls down her cheek. he hasn’t denied that he might not want her anymore. maybe her pessimism about any relationship working out for her isn’t totally misguided. right now, it feels like she’s looking at a man who simply doesn’t care.
and she told him that, plenty of times before, how sometimes she fears that a happy ending might just not be in the cards for her.
rafe stays silent as they sit on his bed. it eats away at her.
“if breaking up is inevitable, we might as well do it now,” she murmurs, partly out of spite, but mostly out of defeat.
rafe’s eyes dart up to meet hers again. the wound he thought she patched up, the one that convinced him over and over that she’ll leave him, rips open.
“were you ever really in this in the first place?” he accuses her, his face twisting in anger. “or did you always think i was gonna disappoint you like every other guy?”
she scoffs in disbelief. the string of tension that they’ve both been walking on since draft night has snapped.
he shouldn’t have said that. she shouldn’t have said what she said, either. but it’s too late. they’re both tense. they’re both too short-tempered.
“no. i’m sorry,” she says weakly. “i’m just… this is so hard. already. i’m worried about us.”
she rests her forehead on her hand, trying to rein in her rushing emotions. rafe’s stare softens as he watches her shoulders start to gently tremble with her cries.
“hey,” rafe says quietly, pushing past his pride, gripping the back of her hand. “come here.”
she lets him pull her forward, collapsing in his arms, her cheek against his firm chest.
“breaking up isn’t inevitable,” he murmurs. “i don’t want to hear you say stuff like that.”
“i know,” she whispers. “i know. just… promise me you won’t change your mind.”
“i promise, baby.” he kisses her forehead, meeting her eyes again.
they both know they need to talk about this. really talk about it, instead of snapping at each other and then brushing it away so quickly. but it hurts too much right now and they’d rather exist in a reality where they’re in the same town, able to see each other whenever they want.
the future still feels shaky to her, but she lets herself melt into his touch, hoping if she pretends she has no doubts, that they’ll eventually go away.
she cuddles into him again, silent, wishing time with him didn’t always go by so fast.
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sadsimp · 7 months ago
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Hi!! was wondering if u can do a tkatb characters with mc with low self esteem?
TKATB with a mc with low self esteem <3
I’m so sorry it took this long😭 I hope you like it <3 
I’m not sure if you meant platonic or romantic, so I tried to make it for both :)
Brittney:
I feel like she wouldn’t notice, like at all. She’s probably is the reason with her comments tbh.. 
But! If you come out and say it, she’d get it I think. If it was the Mean Girls, she’d want to fight them I’m sure. Another food fight? Perhaps..👀 
If something she said makes you upset and your esteem go down, i honestly don’t think she’d apologize right away. You’d have to tell her what she said was hurtful and then she would apologize. 
If someone else made a comment? Hands are thrown✊👊 She stands up for you and won’t let anyone talk shit about you. 
I feel like she would understand, and try to help with the ways that help her. 
She’d offer to prepare a bath for you and get some of your favorite snacks, before watching a movie together. She’d let you pick(reluctantly) and when/if she gets bored during it, she would speak up and tell you not to listen to the others. That you’re fine just the way you are 🩷
Geo:
He wouldn’t care💀😭
He’d be like “Not my problem 😐”
But let’s get into our fantasies and make him nice 😌
He’s very observant, so he’d probably know real quick. He’d ask you about it out right and bluntly. He doesn’t beat around the bush. 
If you deny it, he’s not gonna be mad. He understands that it’s not something you want to admit. He would hope you would tell him the truth. 
If you confirm his suspicions, he’d be subtle. 
He can tell by the way you curl in on yourself when someone comments about you. He glares at the people who even talk to you, and tell them off. 
He’d bring an extra hoodie or sweater and offer it for you. He’d share some of his food with you, much to the dismay of Deryl.
He’s suggest you come over to his dorm/place/home and set up something nice. He’d offer some tea, wrap you up in a blanket with him, and put on some soft music to soothe you to sleep💜
Deryl:
I don’t he’d notice quickly, but after a while he might catch on. Key word “Might.” I don’t think he’s very observant honestly. 
He’d notice how quiet you get and comment on it. He’d ask if you’re okay and try to cheer you up. He’d listen intently (try to anyway. He love him for it), nodding his head along. He would understand and say you’re not alone. 
That it’s normal for people to feel this way and everyone feels like that sometimes. Even him! 
He would hold out his arms and try for a hug. He’d squeeze you tightly and nuzzle his nose in your hair/neck/cheek/etc
He’s probably the best with jokes and making people feel better. He’d ask what he could do to help, if there’s anything, and try to do it immediately 💛
Jess:
I feel like she wouldn’t notice either honestly. You’d have to be out right with your thoughts and feelings.
She’s completely understanding and offers all the ways that helped her in the past. 
She’d suggest bubbles baths, taking a nap, journalling, hanging out with Brittney-
She’s shyly offer a small hug and hold you for as long as you want. She’d rub your back while humming a tune. If you want, she’d even scratch your back for you. 🧡
I’m sorry I don’t have much else 😭
Crowe:
He notices quickly too. He probably won’t comment and just wait for you to say something. 
He’d try to be subtle with his ways of helping you. Maybe a compliment on your hair one day, another on your outfit, one about how lovely your smile is, another-
And so on. 
If you tell him he’s completely there for you. He’s smiling softly at you as you explain your feelings and he’s nodding along. He’s not entirely sure how to help, but if you tell him he’ll do it. He’d do anything for you. 
He’d ask what he could do. He’d take what you say and also his ideas, while doing some research to help. 
He’d write down some motivation quotes and add them to your work stuff with hopes you’ll see them. 💙
Sol:
He would know immediately and he would try to help you the best he can.
He’d make you cute little lunches with compliments or inspirational words made out of food. 
He’s already offering his shirt, just take it. It’s there to make you feel better! Totally not any other reason..
If you want to talk about it, he’s more than happy to led an ear. 
He’d also try to distract you I think. He’s always eager to spend time with you, and this is a good excuse! He’d suggest a bunch of different stuff like a museum, art show, etc.
Many museums have sculptures, and he would go for those ones specifically to show you that you’re perfect the way you are. People in the ancient times thought they were beautiful, so why aren’t you? You are. 💚
Hyugo:
He’d try to distract you from your thoughts I think, once he realizes them. He’d probably take a bit of time before he does notice though.
He’d invite you to watch movies, listen to inspirational stories, or funny tv shows with him. 
I’m a firm believer he’s all for aggressive positivity. Waving his arms in a heart shape and screaming affirmations to you. 
He’d be very protective, glaring at anyone who dares look at you the wrong way, and then turning back to you pouting about how they were interrupting. 
He would try to bake something or get you treats from a local bakery. I can imagine him putting the little treats into a cute box with ribbon. In order to get the desserts, you would have to accept some compliments 🩵
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dreamwritesimagines · 6 months ago
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The Eye of the Hurricane [19] - Couples Therapy
A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback, you made my day! ❤️I hope you’ll like this chapter as well, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think! ❤️
Summary: A therapy session can be enlightening.
Word Count: 2300
Pairing: MobBoss!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: Violence, guns, crime, blood, explicit language, dysfunctional relationship. This is an AU, friendly reminder that I don’t condone any of the actions depicted on this story and please read with care.
Series Masterlist
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It wasn’t like you thought taking Bucky to couple’s therapy for your technically fake marriage was going to be easy, but you didn’t think it would be this difficult.
Bucky bounced his leg beside you on the sofa while you both sat in the waiting room, his eyes darting around the room as if he expected someone to attack him at any moment.
“What happens if she asks me questions?” he asked you gruffly and you pulled your brows together.
“You’ll be fine.”
Bucky huffed out and turned to you.
“How about instead of doing this, I just pay you money to walk out of here?”
“Not gonna happen, Bucky.”
“I’ll put the weekend house under your name, you like it there.”
“The weekend house will be mine once we get a divorce anyway,” you reminded him. “It’s on the prenup.”
Bucky licked his lips. “Do you want another house?”
“Stop trying to bribe me,” you told him as he eyed the door to the therapist’s office before fixing the gun in his waistband and you gasped.
“Why did you bring a gun to the therapy?!” you hissed and he narrowed his eyes.
“We don’t know what expects us in there!” he whispered back, making your jaw drop.
“Do you seriously think—Bucky, look me in the eye and tell me you think our therapist is going to try to shoot us in couple’s therapy—”
“Mr. and Mrs. Barnes?” the therapist’s voice reached you as the door opened and you both turned to her before you smiled at her sweetly.
“Hi!”
“You can come in,” she said, stepping aside and you let out a breath, then stood up, holding Bucky by the arm to signal him to stand as well. Bucky heaved a sigh as if he was being tortured but followed you into the room dutifully and you both sat down on the couch, the therapist taking her seat soon after.
“Dr. Raynor,” you said and she smiled back at you.
“Mrs. Barnes.”
“Y/N is fine,” you said and motioned at Bucky. “And this is Bucky.”
Bucky gave her a curt nod quietly and you cleared your throat, shifting your weight.
“My therapist Dr. Cooper recommended you,” you told her. “She speaks very highly of you.”
“Dr. Cooper is a very respected colleague of mine,” she told you. “The feeling is mutual. So what brings you here?”
“Well, we’ve just got married,” you said. “And I’ve been in therapy since I was a child, basically. Bucky on the other hand has a more distant stance towards it so I figured it could help us both if we did it together.”
Dr. Raynor nodded and turned to Bucky.
“And what about you Bucky?” she asked. “What brings you here?”
Bucky raised his brows before pointing at you with his thumb. “She did.”
You crossed your arms, leaning back in the couch and Dr. Raynor hummed.
“You don’t think you should be here?”
“Honestly doc, I have no idea why I’m here,” he said. “I’m fine, our marriage is fine, so...”
“It hasn’t been a month since we got married,” you added. “Just putting it out there. But I think it’ll help Bucky if we build this—habit.”
She turned to Bucky. “And how about you?” she asked. “How do you feel about therapy, Bucky?”
“My dad would always say whatever your problems are, they should stay between your two ears instead of anyone else’s,” Bucky replied, bouncing his leg again. “Hate to agree with the guy, but he has a point.”
“George isn’t exactly the epitome of good mental health, Buck.”
Bucky shrugged his shoulders. “Either way.”
“Fathers may have different viewpoints especially when it comes to mental health,” Dr. Raynor said. “Given their generation.”
Bucky clicked his tongue. “Well, he and my mother have never been to therapy and they’re fine.”
“Your father had like one thousand mistresses,” you pointed out, making Dr. Raynor raise her brows and Bucky made a face.
“Allegedly.”
“It’s not allegedly, Becca literally told me she once—”
“Bucky, how would you describe your parents’ marriage?” she asked and Bucky heaved a sigh.
“They’re fine.”
“Would you say you look up to their marriage?” she asked. “Or that you want to have a similar one?”
You scoffed. “Good luck with that.”
“You wouldn’t want to have that?” she asked and you shook your head.
“Bucky can’t disrespect me like that.”
“Can’t or won’t?”
You pulled your brows together, then shrugged your shoulders.
“Both,” you said without looking at him. “We have a deal, so I believe he will hold up his end of the deal.”
Out of the corner of your eye, you could see the proud smile curling Bucky’s lips and Dr. Raynor nodded.
“Anything else you feel like you took after your father, besides your opinion on therapy?”
“Why are we talking about my father?” Bucky asked back while you tried to hold back the retort. “I thought this was couples therapy.”
“We can talk about anything you feel like we need to talk about,” Dr. Raynor said. “But most of the time, our parents’ relationship is the blueprint of our own relationships even if we don’t realize it.”
“That’s not what’s happening here,” Bucky said, motioning at you. “It’s different.”
“How?”
“What she said,” Bucky said curtly, nodding in your direction and you heaved a sigh. “He’s good with my mom, and he’s great with my sister, no need to talk about him.”
“But not with you?” Dr. Raynor asked and Bucky dragged his tongue over his teeth.
“He’s fine.”
“Bucky,” said and he shot you a look.
“What?”
“He’s fine with you? Really?”
“Y/N, not everyone needs a father, okay?” he insisted. “Some of us need a boss while growing up in this business.”
“I don’t think you needed a boss instead of a father when you were a kid, actually,” you insisted, making Dr. Raynor tilt her head.
“Would you mind explaining that?” she asked. “That boss comment?”
Bucky drummed his fingertips on his knee.
“It’s a part of…” he stopped himself and cleared his throat. “My father knew what I was capable of, so he pushed me until I saw it. Until I proved myself. That’s not a terrible thing, it worked out after all.”
You licked your lips.
“Really?” you asked. “So you’d be totally okay with following his footsteps?”
 That made him stop for a moment and he scoffed.
“Fine, I wouldn’t do the cage fight because that shit’s medieval but it was because he knew I could handle it,” he defended him. “He’s great with Becca, and I don’t need him to be good with me. We don’t have that kind of relationship.”
Your stomach did a painful flip. “I forgot about that.”
“Cage fight?” Dr. Raynor asked and you both turned to her, Bucky crossing his arms over his chest. You nibbled on your lip.
“Um,” you said. “Our fathers are... CEOs and we both have family companies. There’s this tradition that—the family company has a boss and an heir and when you’re the heir, you need to show that you can handle the job.”
She frowned slightly.
“And the job can get pretty physical,” you said as Bucky let out a bitter chuckle beside you. “And one of the requirements is…when an heir is picked after years of training and everything, once the boss decides it’s time for them to prove themselves, they put you in a cage with other um—” you thought for a moment. “Some professional fighters that happen to be in the business as well, working under the family. Bodyguards, if you will.”
Not bodyguards.
They would put the heir in a cage with the best fighters working for the boss.
“But usually the bosses ask the heir to prove themselves right before they pass the crown, so to speak,” you said and stole a look at him. “Not George though.”
“I was ready to prove myself.”
“At sixteen?” you asked him. “No one fucking asks that of the heir at sixteen, Buck. My father didn’t even put Ian through that yet.”
“I was already his heir, he wanted to make sure,” Bucky said. “I beat everyone up in that cage, didn’t I?”
“Your nose was broken,” you counted with your fingers. “Three of your ribs, you could barely see through one eye for like two weeks because of how swollen it was—”
“But I proved myself,” he pointed out, making you clench your jaw and Dr. Raynor sat up straighter, trying to shake off the shock. “I’m glad I did it, I’d do it again.”
“You see?” you asked. “And then he asks me why we need therapy.”
“I don’t need therapy,” Bucky shot back. “I don’t even know why I’m here, I'm perfectly fine.”
Dr. Raynor licked her lips, then grabbed the notebook by her side while Bucky pursed his lips, slipping a little on the couch.
“Great,” he said. “She has a notebook and everything. Charm, how soon can we leave?”
                                                   *
Well, no one had gotten shot during your first couples therapy session, so as far as you were concerned, it was a success. Bucky had to drop by his office for half an hour to check on something, and after that you figured you could go to lunch together to discuss the next step in your plan so you tagged along.
Becca was already there in his office when you two walked in and Bucky tilted his head.
“What are you doing here?”
“Mom sent me,” she told him before coming to kiss your cheek. “Hey!”
“Hi there,” you said, kissing her cheek back. “We’re going to grab lunch after this, do you want to come?”
“Sure, I could eat,” she said, flinging herself on the couch. “Steve is here too, by the way.”
Bucky frowned. “Did you two come together?”
“Nope, I ran into him by the entrance,” she said while you took your spot next to her and Bucky walked to his laptop to switch it on.
“Mom sent you?” Bucky asked and rolled his eyes. “Let me guess, dad asked her to?”
Becca raised her hands while you gritted your teeth at the mention of George.
“You can’t shoot the messenger, there’s truce now.”
“Then why does it feel like I’m going to get shot by the messenger?” Bucky asked back, making her grin.
“You know how mom is,” she reminded him. “She wants all of us to get along. I take it you’re not willing to have another dinner anytime soon?”
“Fuck no—”
“Hey,” Steve said, knocking on the door and waved at you before turning to Bucky. “You’re busy?”
“Not at all,” Bucky said. “Did we have a meeting today? Did I forget?”
“Nah, I was just around,” Steve said. “Figured I could give you the news myself. Clint is flying to Chicago.”
Bucky pulled his brows together. “What?”
Steve shot him a grin. “My reaction exactly,” he said and came to sit on the other sofa. “How was therapy?”
“Ask Y/N,” Bucky said, clicking on something on his laptop. “She was the one who dragged me there.”
You rolled your eyes at him. “He brought a gun to therapy.”
Becca’s eyes widened. “Did you shoot the therapist, Bucky?!”
“No!” Bucky exclaimed. “Jesus, you two have zero trust in me.”
“How was it, really?” Steve asked you and you shrugged your shoulders.
“He’ll find it easier in the following weeks.”
Bucky frowned at you.
“Following weeks?” he asked. “We’re going there again?”
“Bucky, therapy is not like getting vaccinated,” Becca pointed out. “You can’t just have one session and expect it to fix your shit.”
“I don’t have the time—”
“I already talked to your assistant for the next month, try me,” you said sweetly and Bucky let out a groan, then turned to Steve.
“What is it about Clint and Chicago?”
“Well, he seems to believe that he can convince Rhett.”
Becca’s head whipped up and she blinked a couple of times while you tried to keep a straight face, and subtly pressed your index finger on your lips, giving her a slight grin. She let out a breath, then turned to Steve while Bucky scoffed.
“Yeah, that’s impossible.”
“What’s that about Chicago?” Becca asked and Steve heaved a sigh.
“Chicago’s prince became the new king recently,” he explained. “I thought it was hard to talk to his father, I spoke way too soon.”
“Yeah, he’s a dickhead,” Bucky pointed out while you bit inside your cheek to keep your laughter in. Becca sat up straighter.
“Why?”
“He doesn’t trust anyone who’s not from Chicago,” Steve said. “Refuses to do business with anyone else.”
“But doesn’t he kind of have to do it?” Becca asked. “Even we do business with other cities.”
“Chicago is different, Bec,” Bucky said. “They have their own rules, and as of now, they don’t actually need other cities.”
“Word on the street they might have to do it soon though,” Steve said. “Every boss in New York is trying to convince him, but as Bucky said, he’s a dickhead so…”
���That’s pointless, I’m telling you,” Bucky said as he typed at his laptop, then slammed the lid shut. “Okay, I’m done. Lunch?”
“I have a meeting with Sam,” Steve said as he stood up from the couch and he and Bucky walked to the door while Becca clicked her tongue, turning to look at you with a huge grin on her face.
“So,” she said and you hummed.
“Yes?”
“I take it he doesn’t know?”
“Nope.”
“None of them do?”
You shook your head, still smiling and Becca let out a laugh, then threw her arm over your shoulder.
“Nice plan,” she said and you giggled.
“Thank you,” you said, wrapping an arm around her waist. “Let’s go, you know how hungry therapy makes me.”
Chapter 20
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storiesofsvu · 3 months ago
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Decadent Desires Ch 15
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Emily Prentiss x reader Warnings: language, smut eluded to/mentioned, mainly a filler chapter taking place in the days directly following the last chapter.
Rolling over Emily felt her body sink even deeper into your mattress, the blankets cocooned perfectly around her and she felt more relaxed than she had all week. She heard the all to familiar creak of your shower tap as it turned off and she let out a quiet groan, she’d forgotten it was Monday. With a reluctantly huff she pushed herself up to sitting, starting to change out of the pyjamas you’d leant her back into the clothes she’d tossed into a spare chair.
“You could’ve stayed sleeping.” Your voice quietly broke through the room as you re-entered it, clad in only your underwear as you stepped toward your closet.
“It’s fine.” She pinched at the bridge of her nose, “I’ve got a mountain of paperwork I need to get a start on.”
“My grocery order got delayed thanks to the weather, best I can offer you is a frozen waffle.”
“Don’t worry about it.” She chuckled, “I usually grab something on the way in anyways.”
“Good.” You turned to her with a grin, “cause I’m pretty sure they’re past the best by date.”
Emily laughed, shaking her head at you, her eyes lingering on your semi naked frame longer than she had originally intended. Your phone pinged and the hanger in your hand dropped to the bed as you picked up the device, your attention fully on it as you face her. It was then Emily noticed the deep purple nearly black bruise on your thigh and she was about to make a comment about your tennis skills until her eyes focused and she realized there was a clear line of teeth marks on the outer edge. Her mind thought back to the previous evening, the band-aid on  your arm mixed with this was a clear sign you’d had some fun in Florida.
“Ugh.” You dropped your phone down on the nightstand, picking up the shirt and putting it on, “you think some people would have the decency to wait past eight a.m. to start planning a date.”
“Date?” Her brow raised in your direction and you let out a huff, stepping into a pencil skirt, quickly fixing your outfit before grabbing a pair of heels.
“Yeah. Heather needed specific support for a legislation and I got roped into going on a date with this congressman’s kid. You flirt a little and they’ll take it a whole other direction.”
She followed you down the stairs, beginning to wonder just how much fun you’d had in Florida, “that a regular occurrence?”
“Depends. Most of the time it’s only dinner or drinks with the added bragging rights of being seen together.” You shrugged, “you want a coffee to go?”
“Yeah, sure.”
It only took you a few seconds to pour her out a mug, fixing it perfectly to her liking before handing it to her.
“Thanks.” She smiled at you, her shoulders relaxing once again when you smiled right back at her.
“I’ll see you Wednesday?”
“Yeah, of course.” With another smile she turned back toward the door, collecting her coat and stepping into her shoes.
“And Emily?” You called out, poking your head around the corner.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t ever feel bad about calling or showing up, okay? I’d hate for you to be alone at home trapped with whatever haunting thoughts are running through your brain after a bad case.”
“Okay.” She laughed softly a warmth spreading through her cheeks.
“I mean it. And if you’re too dragged down or drunk to drive, I’ll knock down your door. I know it’s difficult being the boss, but you’ve gotta remember, you’re important too.”
“Thank you, really.” Stepping toward the door she pulled it open, grimacing at the view outside, “and you promise me you’re gonna drive safe, it looks like shit out here.”
“I will.”
*
Emily had been right, the roads were pretty terrible, making your commute longer and worse than you’d expected. You’d shot a text off to Heather about running late and she told you not to worry about it, she’d rather have you take your time and arrive in one piece than rush and risk something happening. You were stuck at a light you’d been waiting three rotations at already when your phone buzzed in the cupholder. Picking it up you assumed it was another text from Heather to find that it was your Venmo app, a hundred dollar payment received from Emily.
A weird sensation wormed its way into your stomach and for a moment you thought maybe you’d accidentally used spoiled milk in your coffee. The screen remained on your phone, glaring up at you in the low morning light, and you tugged your lip between your teeth as the wheels started turning in your brain. You knew what your agreement was, you’d signed and added to the contract after all, one hundred dollars for anything that was akin to a casual dinner or simple companionship. In your mind, that meant something like going out to a movie, having lunch during a relaxed weekend, running errands together so you didn’t have to do it alone. Your thumb hovered over the ‘refund’ button, it almost felt weird taking money from Emily for something like her needing comfort, she’d needed a friend or something more in that moment, not a client. Right as you were about to make an impulsive decision, the light changed and the car behind you laid on their horn, causing you to drop your phone back into the cupholder and forget about it for the time being.
Thankfully the rest of the way to the office was relatively clear and you managed to make record time, collecting your things and making your way inside. You thought it was time for a quiet morning, not a lot of people around the building, but right as you passed Heather’s office her voice called out.
“Hey!”
Freezing in your step, you winced, slowly backtracking to her door, “sorry, I did my best.”
“Sweetheart with the quality of work you do I couldn’t give a fuck if you were late.” She opened a drawer of her desk, pulling out a couple of things, “c’mere.” You almost hesitantly entered her office, crossing the space to her desk as she grinned up at you, extending a sealed envelope, “from Rob.”
“Oh, perfect.” You tucked it into your bag.
“You alright?” She asked, surveying you for a minute.
“Yeah, drive just frazzled me a little bit.”
“Okay.” She glanced down to your purse, “are you going to open that?”
“It’s basically only for my peace of mind anyways. I’ll let you know if there’s any wildly shocking results.”
“Better hope you’re not pregnant, I’m not raising another one.”
“God you are such a comedian, and at this hour of the morning. Just how do you do it?”
“Anymore sass and you’re not getting the other thing I have in here for you.”
“Oh?”
She chuckled softly, pulling out a small box from the drawer and handing it to you, “good job in Florida. You really upped your game.”
“Thank you.”
“On the contrary, I should be thanking you.”
“Isn’t that what this is?” You gestured to the gift box.
“That’s for last week.”
“Then…what are you thanking me for?”
“Keeping the appropriate kind of secrets from me at the appropriate time.” She smiled, “Now go on,” she shooed you away, “you’ve got more important things to do than stand around gossiping.”
**
Despite not calling the team in until Wednesday, Emily found herself back at the office midday Monday, working through as much as she could to make sure every report she handed off to Bailey had an excruciating amount of detail with all the I’s dotted and t’s crossed.
Tuesday she stayed stationed at her desk the entire day, working well into the evening, thanking the desk clerk for bringing up multiple rounds of take out so she wasn’t surviving on coffee alone. It was a heavy paperwork week, there were a handful of invoices still sitting in her inbox she needed to explain what were for and sign off on before sending them up the chain, payroll needed to be completed and her inventory needed to be double checked and sent off. With the team coming back in tomorrow she was hoping she could get most of it done by noon considering once their paperwork was done she needed to sign off on it before it went up the chain and there was always the chance of them catching another case. She was starting to wish she’d pushed them coming back until Thursday at this point.
Her phone buzzed on her desk and she glanced up, honestly welcome for the intrusion as she blinked her eyes a few times, pushing her glasses up onto her head as she dropped her pen, flexing her hand in an attempt to relieve the cramp. Picking up her phone she was surprised to see Heather’s name flash across the screen and she quickly swiped open the message.
‘Sorry to bother you, I know you’re likely busy as all hell but I would love to get your professional opinion on something sometime this week.’
‘Yeah, of course. What are your office hours looking like this week? I’m probably going to be swamped tomorrow but could manage to disappear for a midday so called lunch.’
‘I was thinking more along the lines of after hours. Any chance you think you could swing by my place Thursday around eight? I promise you’ll be sent home with a to go plate from dinner and a bottle of Macallan.’
‘Oh well, twist my rubber arm why don’t you.’ Emilylaughed softly, ‘send me the address again, I know you’re Chevy Chase but can’t remember much past that.’
‘You’re a gem. Thank you.’  ‘3301 Fessenden St NW’
Emily put down the phone, picking up the pen to scribble the address into her desk calendar, chewing on her thumbnail as she looked through all the notes written down. Her eyes landed on the green ink on Wednesday evening and she let out a small huff before picking up her phone again, selecting your contact.
‘Hey, I know we scheduled for Wednesday but do you think there’s any chance we can push it to the weekend, Saturday even? It’s payroll week and quarterly end and I didn’t quite realize how much I’d let pile up.’
She waited a few minutes, taking the opportunity to continue with her break, scrolling through a few apps and replying to another couple of personal text messages in the meantime before her phone buzzed once again.
‘Fucking hell I forgot about fucking payroll.’ ‘Yeah the weekend is totally fine. And don’t stress about making a reservation or anything yet, if you’re too wiped when the time comes we can just wait til next week, I won’t be offended.’
‘Alright.’ She laughed softly, ‘I’ll pencil you in for Saturday then?’
‘Sounds perfect.’
‘Why are you worrying about payroll?’
‘Heather’s PA is on vacation; I’ve been covering the more complicated duties while she’s gone.’
‘Pain the ass, hey?’
‘Absolutely. When you’re a kid you think being the boss is gonna be the coolest thing, turns out it’s all paperwork.’
‘Tell me about it.’
She let out a small laugh, placing her phone back down on the desk as she let out a small sigh and slid her glasses back on. If she was going to keep adding to her week, she better pick up right where she left off.
**
The sound of the doorbell echoed through the Dunbar household on Thursday evening and Rob was the one who got to there first, pulling it open to enthusiastically greet Emily.
“Hey, come in, come in.” He gestured, swinging the door shut behind her, “it’s been a while.”
“It really has.” She laughed softly, accepting the brief one armed hug while he offered to take her coat and she was able to toe off her snow coated shoes.
“How’s the bureau? Heat tells me you’ve moved up to Section Chief?”
“Oh, entirely too much paperwork and definitely not enough fun.”
“Sounds like you need a vacation.” He half teased before calling down the hall, “Heat, you’ve got company.”
It only took a couple of seconds before Heather had rounded a corner down the long hall, actively wiping her hands off on a dish towel as she approached them.
“Thank you so much for coming.” Leaning in she pressed a kiss to her cheek, “there’s straight liquor and wine upstairs but we’ve got mojito and negroni’s going in the kitchen if you prefer.”
“Wine is fine.” Emily assured and Heather turned to her husband, passing off the dish towel.
“Would you make sure you pack up a nice container from dinner for her, and don’t skimp! Lord knows she’s been living off small town takeout.”
“Double portions of everything, got it.” Rob replied with a small salute to his wife before disappearing down the same hall.
Heather’s hand quickly pressed on the small of Emily’s back, directing her up the stairs, “sorry it’s a bit chaotic in here tonight.” She commented, no doubt addressing the amount of noise bouncing around through the house. “You’d think two kids coming home for dinner would mean just that and maybe some laundry but Jordan’s taken over the basement entertainment system with a group of his friends, Becca’s got a mock Jeopardy battle going on to help study for winter exams and Rob’s entertaining one of the biggest hospital owners in the State.”
“Sounds like none of you Dunbar’s know how to rest.” Emily teased, following Heather into her home office.
“I would say the work ethic’s in the genes but I’m pretty sure the boys are playing Grand Theft Auto downstairs.” She turned back around, handing off a hefty glass of wine to the other woman, “how about you? Have things calmed down at all?”
“In the sense of field work, I guess. But the paperwork never stops and it’s just so dull.” She groaned, “I really don’t know how you keep up with your workload.”
“I’ve got a rather large and very talented and committed team, most of whom I raised from the ground up.”
Emily nodded, her ears picking up the sound of stilettos on the hardwood, almost like they were pacing up and down the hallway, another dinner companion that seemed to be on the phone, little hums and huffs every so often until your voice hit her ears. She could just make it out over the small talk her and Heather continued to have before diving into things. You were using a sickeningly sweet yet also a completely dominating voice that Emily had never heard before. There was a husk to it, but it also sounded like utter silk and she was practically melting, her attention drifting from Heather’s voice more than she meant it to.
You’d been approaching Heather’s office to use to finish up your private conversation but once you made it a foot from the door you realized that she had company. Trying both not to interrupt and also not be clearly overheard depending on her guest, you lingered in the doorway as you talked.
“Ohohoho..” you let out a low laugh, “come on now Frank, you know Ms. Dunbar needs this done by the end of the week, I’m sure you have even the tiniest sliver of time to squeeze us in. How about I get us a table at Palm Court? You know I’ll be sure to have the Wagyu flown in from Kagoshima, just like you like it.” You barely let a beat pass, “don’t you worry about Claire, I’ll keep her nice and busy, it’s been a while since we’ve met up and lord knows I need a fresh manicure.”
Feeling cocky enough that you’d sealed the deal you made the slow steps towards Heather’s door, keeping your voice quiet enough to not disturb her conversation.
“That’s what I thought. Thank you.”
Heather glanced up at the sound of success in your voice as you stepped into the office and small smirk overtook her lips. Emily watched as you dropped the façade, your body relaxing though you still absolute exuded power and confidence. Rather than a cute little skirt and top, she figured it was the weather that made you opt for the very form fitting pant suit, white tank blouse dipping just below your collarbone to leave enough for imagination but entice everyone, blazer likely strewn somewhere else in the house. You crossed the room, tossing Heather’s work cell down onto her desk.
“Underwood will meet you at two on Friday.”
“I—What?” It was Emily’s voice that cut in first and you glanced toward her with a grin on your cheeks.
“What?”
“You’re on first name basis with The President?”
“Part of the job.” You shrugged, “besides, his wife always has the best gossip.”
Emily practically gaped, looking between you and Heather, watching the other woman chuckle softly.
“See what I mean? She wasn’t even supposed to be here tonight, showed up to finish this deal for me because I wasn’t answering my phone.”
“Yeah…” She nodded, still a little dumbfounded by the entire thing. She knew you were well intermingled with varying levels of politicians but she hadn’t expected something of this magnitude. Then again, when her eyes surveyed over you once more, she could see the sheer amount of power just drifting off you, the only time she’d seen you in work mode before was the very first day she met you and she was starting to realize why Heather had teased her for drooling.
You cast her a smile before turning back to your boss now that she had sat behind her desk “I’ve done by due diligence tonight, but I’m finished babysitting. Becca’s gonna ace her exams, Rob’s sweeping the floor at poker, but your other kid’s an idiot, they’re daring each other to a bellyflop competition.”
“They took the cover off the pool?” Heather groaned, pinching at the bridge of her nose.
“Yeah. A hundred bucks says the hot tub’s next.”
“Jesus Christ.”
“Good thing there’s a slew of doctors in the house.” You teased and Heather rolled her eyes as you turned to Emily, squeezing at her elbow with a bright smile, “good to see you. I love that colour.” Your fingers toyed with the lapel of her blazer and a glinting in the low light caught her eye, an absolutely stunning cluster of diamonds and yellow gold on your wrist, “it looks phenomenal on you.”
“Thanks.” She smiled, her breath nearly catching in her throat as she glanced up at you and you smiled, turning back to Heather.
“You owe me, big.”
“What? Twenty three grand wasn’t enough?” She asked with a tease and you rolled your eyes as you started to make your way out of the room.
“I refuse to pawn gifts, you know that.” You called over your shoulder, “so don’t you dare make me work Christmas.”
“You don’t even celebrate the holidays.”
“Doesn’t mean I don’t like bonus time off,” you turned, resting your hand on the doorframe, bracelet sparkling, “maybe even a few days at one of the plethora of vacation bundles you have stocks in?”
“Thought you said you were done working and thus, done bothering me? Sometimes I regret giving you your own key!”
Heather raised a brow, laughing when all you did in return was flip her off and disappear from her view. Emily chuckled, finally taking a sip of her wine, though her eyes lingered on the doorway as if she could still see the diamonds glinting.
“Something catch your eye?” Heather asked with a smirk and she finally turned back to her, gently dropping into a chair.
“Uh, guess I hadn’t seen her in work mode in a while.” She admitted, feeling her cheeks heat, “didn’t realize she accessorized so well.”
“You like the bracelet?”
“Yeah, it’s stunning.”
“Harry Winston.”
“Damn.” Emily’s eyes widened, “they don’t even list the prices on the website, you’ve got to go in.”
Heather shrugged, “she worked hard for it. Florida certainly earned her a little extra winter bonus.”
“Huh…” Emily nodded, going to take another sip of her wine right as everything managed to click together like puzzle pieces. She quickly masked herself before her eyes could widen again, sucking back more wine as a distraction. A strange sensation began to twist in her lower stomach, one that she didn’t really like at all but it continued to grow as she thought about the woman across the desk from her buried between your legs.
Heather surveyed her for a moment as she took a sip of her own bourbon and she could have sworn she saw the tiniest hint of green flash through her dark eyes. Her head tilted slightly, the sudden way Emily was picking at her thumbnail was speaking pretty clearly but now she was wondering if you had shown up on purpose, flaunting the jewelry. You’d mentioned something to her earlier in the week about Emily cancelling a date, perhaps the grey haired woman wasn’t the only one with green in her eyes.
“Anway,” Heather interrupted with a huff, “I wanted to talk to you.”
“Oh, right.” Emily snapped out of it, glancing up towards her with a smile, “what’s up?”
“Have you heard of an Officer Patterson, out of DC Metro?”
“I—uh..” Emily nearly tensed, briefly remembering the very early phone call in your kitchen a few months prior, “heard of him…”
“He was the one that arrested my son.”
“You.. know about that?”
Heather chuckled, “Jordan’s an idiot, neither he nor his friends can keep a secret very long.” She sighed, “I did a look through the papers, this guy’s a prick. I thought he was just preying on the rich and somewhat famous but he does the same shit with people who can’t afford a good attorney. I want his badge.”
“Don’t you have a lot more power than I do when it comes to that kind of stuff?”
“Potentially.” She took a swig of her drink, “I just figured you might have some contacts at Metro PD who had their own stories or opinions, I know the blue doesn’t like to turn on their own but there has to be a reason this guy’s still a rookie after all these years. Thought you might be able to pull his jacket, take a look through it?”
“You really don’t let people fuck with your family, huh?” Emily asked and Heather nearly snorted.
“Jordan deserved what he got,” she laughed, “he’s damn lucky he wasn’t behind the wheel of a car. I don’t want his arrest expunged or shoved under the rug; I could have done that myself. But I do want to look into this Patterson and see what can be done about it.”
“I’ve got a couple of friends and Metro, and I can see what I can pull up from my database.”
“Thank you.” Heather smiled warmly, her eyes darting up when there was a knock on the doorframe.
“Bad news, I’ve gotta take one of Jordan’s friends in.” Rob said.
“Oh god, what now?”
“They tried to use the diving board without wiping the slush off.” He explained and Heather groaned.
“For fuck’s sake.” She drained her drink, “let me guess, slipped and broke something?”
“Ankle.” Rob replied, then glanced towards their guest, “Emily the bag on the kitchen island is for you, wouldn’t want you to forget it.”
“Oh, thank you so much.”
Rob disappeared from the doorway as Emily finished her drink, following Heather’s lead to standing and moving from the office down the stairs.
“Thank you for coming, and for now I’d like if this could be kept as off the record as possible.”
“Of course.” Emily nodded with a smile as she accepted the bag that definitely had more than one portion of food in it before finally making her way out of the house.
**
When the weekend rolled around you and Emily ended up swapping your date night over to Friday instead, and Emily was honestly glad that you did. She got a call halfway through her work day that a pipe had burst in the basement of her apartment, no water would be available for the next twenty four hours. There had been yet another surprise snowfall and even though it wasn’t that big the roads were terrible and the last thing you wanted was to drive all the way home after work.
This was why it was lucky Emily still had her standing reservation at The Waldorf.
You caught up a bit over dinner and drinks, Emily curious to know more about how often you were in close quarters with the President and First Lady. You rattled on about a couple of things, shared the stories you knew you could, flashed your fresh manicure and shared some gossip you’d gotten from Claire that afternoon. In turn Emily delved a little bit into how her week had been now that she’d finally caught up on paperwork, she had stories about the team she’d never even thought of telling you, the entire evening seeming a little more casual and open than any prior. However that didn’t change the circumstances when you got upstairs, clothes quickly falling to the floor as you dropped onto the bed and became a mess of sweaty tangled limbs.
Emily lay half wrapped around you, her head on your chest as you were propped up on the pillows, a mid nineties rom com playing on the late night television. Your hand was gently playing with her hair, soothingly scratching at her scalp as you did so.
“You okay?” You asked, pressing a gentle kiss to her head.
“Yeah.” Her lips brushed against your collarbone before a tiny yawn escaped them, “it’s just been a long week.”
“Want me to dig into Bailey or anyone?”
“No.” She laughed, “I mean, yeah he’s being a total ass about the last case, but it’ll blow over.”
“Okay.” Your hand trailed up and down her back softly before returning to play with her hair.
“Thank you though.”
“Anytime.” You replied, leaving another kiss on the top of her head.
The next morning you were gone before she woke up, you’d warned her about that the night before, you had brunch plans with Tony and if you bailed on them again you had no doubt he would track your location and show up wherever you were. It did give her the chance to sleep in far later than she thought she would, it was almost noon by the time her eyes opened. She wasn’t used to that, usually have to set an alarm in hotels to make sure housekeeping wasn’t trying to kick her out already.
She ordered room service for breakfast, including a couple of extra meals for the rest of the day and took a very long, luxurious shower. Picking at the leftovers of her first meal while she was wrapped in the cozy warm hotel robe she let the tv play some mindless shows for a couple of hours before she finally gained the energy to start the trek home.
Downstairs she passed off her valet ticket at the concierge and started to flip through some brochures and ads while she waited.
“Anything I can help you with ma’am?” A clerk asked her.
“Uh…” her eyes lingered on the resort in Monarch Beach, the wheels turning in her brain, though that location would be far too chilly to really enjoy this time of year. “You guys have properties all around the world, right?”
“We sure do.” They replied with a bright smile, turning to grab a couple of binders, “thinking about a last minute Christmas getaway? We’ve got quite a few resorts that specialize in the festivities, lots of stuff for the family and kids to take part in.”
“Oh, no.” She shook her head, “not Christmas, definitely no kids, but definitely somewhere warm. Probably tropical, super fancy… a little exclusive… you got anything like that?”
They grinned across at her, pulling out a smaller binder, “I think you’ll find our private resort in the Maldives right up your alley.”
____________________
@mickey-gomez @momlifebehard @daddy-heather-dunbar @maybe-a-humanbean @rustyzebra @leftoverenvy @kades95 @dextur @supercriminalbean @emilyprentisssluvr @lex13cm @zizzlekwum @emobabeyy @riveramorylunar @scorpsik @onmykneesformarvel @inlovewithemilyprentiss @regalmilfs4me @ara-a-bird @inlovewithmiddleagewomen @kmc1989 @irishavengersassemble @hopedoesntknow @venromanova @waitaminuteashh @noahrex @imlike-so-gaydude @wittygutsy @cx-emerald-cx @momily @nilaues @borinxnovak @Soverign @v3nusxsky @mccdreamys-writes @l4yne @obsessedwjill @scarletwitcher97 @asolitaryrose3 @lisqueen @mrs-prentiss @whitewinewithice @d33pd3sire-blog @daffodil-heart @maximoffcarter @i-lovefandom @chimnlex @moonlightjxuregui @chestnutninny @gamma-rae-bursts @just-moondust @idkifimasub @gaydragonwitch @dowsedwithbleach @divergentalwaysandforever-blog
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lunajay33 · 5 months ago
Text
Taste for Older Men Part.2
•⚰️🍂🍑•
Summary: Growing up with you never had much interest in boys your age but when your dads best friends stuck around more everything changed
Pairing: Cowboy Negan x f!reader
Warnings: age gap, evil boyfriend
Part.1
•Masterlist•
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It’s been a week since everything happened, my parents have been extremely over supportive always, when I’d come down for breakfast they’d have wide smiles and cheery voices but I couldn’t hate them for it they’re just trying to make me feel better even though I was already happier than I’ve ever been in my life
I still work everyday at Negans farm but my parents still don’t know that we’re together and we’re not quite sure how to tell them, I mean he’s my dads best friend and I don’t want to ruin that but I also can’t give up Negan he’s all I’ve ever wanted so there’s got to be a way
I was in the barn pitch forking up some loose hay when I feel Negans arms wrap around my waist
“You know if I was gonna get more help around here I’d have told you my feelings way earlier” I laugh as I lean back into his chest
“Watch yourself lil lady I’m still your boss remember”
“Oh I remember” he spins me in his arms resting my hands on his shoulders
“So how do we tell my parents I don’t want to sneak around I want to be able to be with you when we’re around other people”
“I know sunshine, old man invited me over tonight to watch football might tell him then, and you can talk to your mother” I feel nervous about this but it needs to be done
“Hopefully they don’t rip my head off”
“If they’re going that route it’ll be me they rip apart” me smiles as he leans down to kiss me his grey speckled beard scratching against my face but it was something I craved when he wasn’t around
“Come on let’s finish up our chores before you get carried away like last time” I laugh as he groans
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I got home early as Negan let me off to get ready for tonight and go through everything I want to say to my mom, he wanted that time too he had more to worry about but my father is an understanding man I just home he can understand this too
I stripped off my dirty work clothes and hoped in the shower, relaxing as the dirt and sweat from the day washed away down the drain, after I was all squeaky clean I got dressed in a casual pair of black leggings and a red long sleeve shirt, putting two braids in my hair then waiting on my bed anxiously
After another hour I picked up my phone and dialed Negan, after two rings I hear his voice and everything seemed to not be as stressful
“Hey baby ya alright?”
“Yeah I’m better now, just nervous”
“Don’t stress honey I’m on my way over now, we’ll get this settled” he said with a calming tone
“Okay I’ll see you soon”
We hung up and I made my way downstairs sitting at the kitchen island waiting to hear the rumble of his truck, soon the headlights shine through the window and he’s knocking at the door
I want to rush to the door and through my arms around him but contain myself and let my dad answer, Negans technically his guest anyways
“Negan! You excited for the game buddy?” My dad asked cheerfully as he patted him on the shoulder
“You bet, I meet you in the lounge soon I’ll go say hi to your wife and y/n!”
“Always with the southern hospitality!”
Negan rounded the corner and came into the kitchen where me and my mother sat I couldn’t help the huge smile that stretched my cheeks
“Negan so wonderful to see you again, last time was a bit crazy” I looked down a little embarrassed by that whole fiasco
“Lovely to see you too, and of course my dear little farm hand” he said brushing his hand down my back out of my mothers gaze making my skin chill
“Oh Negan she’s still behaving well isn’t she?”
“Mother of course I am”
“Don’t worry she’s always a great help, got myself a lil working lady”
I look up at him with so much joy and admiration before my mother clear her throat and snaps us out of our moment
“Well here’s two beers, better get in there before he makes a big deal about us stealing you away again” she laughed handing over the beers and began left the room
I look back at my mother who had a knowing look on her face, raised eyebrow with a slight smirk
“What?”
“I’m not stupid sweetie, I’ve seen the way you looked at him since he started coming around, only recently he’s been giving you the same look soooooo you have something to tell me dear”
“Don’t be mad, what I feel for him is real, how he treats me really show how badly Mike treated me and how much Negan treats me like a goddess, he’s a good man”
“I’m not mad, I’m glad you found a man who can treat you the way you deserve, hopefully your father will look at it the same way”
I down now we wait to either hear a fight or Negan comes out smiling
“WHAT?” I hear from the lounge, oh no
I rush into the lounge seeing my dad up in Negans face and he looked more betrayed than angry
“Dad, calm down it’s okay”
“How is this okay my best friend with my daughter”
“I love her f/n” he went silent and so did I this was the first time Negans declared his love
“You love me?” I ask as I step closer
“Of course I do, you’re a wonderful woman every moment with you I feel more happier and at ease than I’ve ever been”
“I love you too sunshine” I lean up to wrap my arms around his neck and he held me tight
“F/n, you know Negan and he’ll treat her right compared to that excuse for a boyfriend she had before” my mom said then hearing my dad sigh
“I know it’s just a lot to wrap my head around, when did this happen?”
“The day we had the barbecue, he came and made me feel better about everything that happened and well our feelings just came out”
“I mean me and your mother knew how you felt about Negan it was pretty obvious, I guess I can eventually get use to this”
“My god was it that obvious?” I ask looking up at Negan and he had a sly smirk
“You didn’t make it sneaky when you’d look at me darlin”
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Taglist: @azanoni @scorpioempress @fanficwriter5 @elliesr1fle @imimatcha4life @indigosparkle444
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gh0stsp1d3r · 1 year ago
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hiiiii
first i would just like to say i looveee your writing its so good
secondly, i was wondering if i could request a kraven x fem reader smut where they’re on a mission together and they end up getting a hotel room but surprise surprise there’s only on bed so they end up having to share it but while they’re getting ready for bed and she’s undressing to change he sees her bare back when shes not noticing and then he starts acting different when they get in bed and she asks why and he kisses her and then they ;) also could they already have a kind of flirty relationship but also kinda get annoyed with each other pretty easily?
anyways i know its a lot but its been stuck in my head all day and i have no writing skills AT ALLLLL
thank youuuuuuu ❤️❤️❤️
I LOVE THE ONE BED TROPE AND I LOVE THIS REQUESY ANON!! This was a bit long 😭 BUT THANK YOU!!
Shower thoughts
Smut, MDNI, masturbation (m), oral (f), p in v, unprotected sex (don’t do this irl people), cum eating, fingering (; porn w plot
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You groaned as you fell onto the hard concrete, you stared at Sergei and someone else fighting, finally he had (violently) killed the man, he bled out in the open, no one to help him.
“You alright?” He said, looking back at you, blood on his hands and face, slightly staining his shirt. He reached out a hand for you to grab.
You nodded and grabbed his hand, he helped you up.
“Probably gonna hurt in the morning. I’ll be fine.”You said, sighing and looking around in the open field.
“We just gonna leave him out in the open.”
“Nah.” He took a minute or two to use his powers, and suddenly a tiger came roaring from out of nowhere, and it bit the man’s head off.
“Oh, Okay.”
“Alright. Well, we should probably go to a hotel or something. I’m exhausted, I’m sure you are too, and it’s like.. 10 pm already.”
“I am.” You laughed quietly, getting into the car and he drove off.
He stopped at the closest one, it was a small motel, but it would do fine for a night.
“You gonna take a shower?” He asked you, you nodded. You both walked up to the front office.
“I’ll take one after you, or with you.” He said, eyebrows raised.
“Shut up.” You laughed, pushing his shoulder.
He went up to the desk, the woman behind it not paying attention too much.
“Hey.” He said, she turned around.
“Hey. What’s up?” She asked, eating ramen noodles and slurping them.
“Can we get a room? Just for one night.”
She looked at the both of you, still eating. You both awkwardly just stared and waited.
“Sure.” She said, taking the key and handing it you. “That’ll be 120$ please.” she said with a smile.
“120…” you sighed, taking out your wallet when Sergei stopped you, taking out his instead and paying the lady.
“Have a good night.” She said, and you both quickly left.
“You didn’t have to.” You said, as you both walked.
He shrugged “I don’t mind.”
Once he finally found the number, he opened the door to one bed. He turned on the light to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. Nope. One bed.
“Damn. Was there really no other room?” You sighed, putting down your stuff.
Sergei sighed, and put his stuff down as well.
“Well, I’m gonna go take a shower.” You said, quickly going into the bathroom.
As the shower ran, so did he thoughts. He’s often thought about you, with his cock in his hand or just randomly sometimes.
He was thinking about how your body would look under the wet shower, how you would look under him. He shifted and groaned quietly, looking at the bathroom and back to the TV.
There wasn’t much that was sexy about an old veteran feeding homeless people on the news.
So he waited, and you soon shut off the shower. Sergei watched you like a hawk as you made your way to your bag, rummaging through it.
The motel towel didn’t hide much, it was small and thin, cheap.
“Would you stop staring at me?” You asked, still going through the bag.
“I’m not staring, what do you mean?” He said, looking the other way when you looked back. You finally found some clothes and Sergei looked back. He swore this was some sort of his sick fantasies.
He saw your back, ass only covered by a small black pair of underwear. He stared again, and he just grew impossibly harder every second.
You slipped a t-shirt over your head, and a pair of pajama pants.
“I’m gonna go take a shower.” He mumbled, so he went into the bathroom.
He quickly turned on the water and locked the door, he quickly took off his pants and boxers that he had, freeing his very hard and red cock.
He hopped in the shower, and slowly started to stroke it, imagining it was your hand instead of his, imagining you underneath him in the shower.
Then his thoughts ran back to how you almost exposed yourself fully naked in front of him, not knowing how much it turned him on.
“Fuck.” He mumbled, throwing his head back. It didn’t take long for him to finish, and quickly wash his body.
He went out to change and saw you scrolling on your phone, you were clueless to what just happened. He quickly changed, and got in the bed.
“So.. tomorrow…” you started, turning off your phone and turning to your side to look at him.
“Uh.. what about tomorrow?” He looked at you, also turning to his side.
You furrowed your eyebrows “We still have that one mission. You know-“
“Oh. Right, right, I forgot for a second.”
You laughed quietly and he smiled.
You were talking again, about random things, and he just nodded and said “uh huh.” “Wow.” And “cool”
You furrowed your eyebrows when you realized, and looked at him in confusion. You stopped talking and he looked back at you.
“Is something wrong?” You asked him finally.
“No.”
“Did I.. do something?”
“No…” well, I’m glad you asked, you changed in front of me and I got a hard on.
“Oh. Well then why are you so…”
“I’m just tired. Sorry.” He said, and he saw how you were kinda hurt. You nodded and turned the other way, he couldn’t go to sleep.
“Actually..” he sighed after a while, you turned back to him.
“Can I be honest?” You both looked at each other now.
You nodded, and he didn’t say anything else, but he did lean close to you, you were shocked when he kissed you, eyes wide for a second, before you kissed him back.
“I saw your body, when you were changing, fuck, I’m sorry but-“
“You were watching me.. change?” You asked, teasing him.
“No… yes..?”
You laughed quietly and shook your head.
“That’s cute. But if you wanted to, you coulda asked.” You gave him another kiss, this one wasn’t so loving and slow as the other one.
His tongue explored your mouth, he kissed you hungrily and he slowly moved around, he disconnected his lips for a second to get on top of you.
“Do you wanna do this?” He asked, making sure. You nodded eagerly, with a smile on your face.
His hands explored your body, he pulled up your shirt first, revealing your tits.
Something he’d always fantasized about.
He smiled and littered small kisses all along your body, you just stared at him. Slowly he took off your pants, putting them on the floor next to your shirt.
He slowly took off your underwear after, he looked up at you as his fingers trailed down to your clit, running circles. You bit your lip and he stopped, you whined at the loss.
“I wanna hear you. Okay?”
“Okay.” You nodded and released your lip, and he slowly put his fingers back on your clit, and you let out a moan, your back arching off the bed slightly as he worked his fingers.
And he was good with his fingers.
That’s when he did something you didn’t expect, he replaced his fingers with his tongue, you gasped and made noises that were like music to his ears.
Your hands went flying to his hair, tugging and pulling on it as he ate you out, you tasted as wonderful as he had imagined.
“Sergei- Im gonna-“ you mumbled.
“Please do.” He said, disconnecting his tongue for a second, with a small smile. He then dived back in and soon you were cumming on his tongue.
You caught your breath while he took his sweatpants and boxers off, his cock was painfully hard.
He stroked it a couple times, and you impatiently whined.
“Sergei!”
“Sorry, love.” He said, giving you a small kiss on the cheek and aligning his cock with your entrance.
He groaned while you moaned, he stayed still for a minute and he looked at your reaction to see if he could move.
Your eyes screwed shut, it hurting at first. Then you nodded, and he started to move slowly, he smiled and slowly thrusted.
“Sergei- please.” You said.
“Use your words, please what?”
“Go faster!” You whined again, making him smile as he did just that.
His thrusts that were once slow and loving, turned fast and relentless, his stamina animalistic almost.
“Yeah- shit- fuck, you’re so tight.” He mumbled, the sounds of skin slapping filling the room. The cheap bed banging against the wall next door.
He smiled at your reaction to his words, and you felt the coil forming in your stomach.
“Mmm- Sergei..” you moaned out, he groaned.
“You’re so hot, you know that? I’ve dreamed of this forever.” He growled out.
“I’m gonna cum-“ you mumbled, and he nodded.
“Let’s cum together, okay?” He suggested, you nodded and that’s exactly what you both did.
You both bottomed out, and he took his cock out of your pussy, making you cry out. He went back up to you and kissed you.
“Sorry, but if we don’t stop, we aren’t gonna be able to.” He said with a smirk, you rolled your eyes.
“Whatever. Just cuddle me.” You mumbled, as he put back on his boxers only, and he helped you put back on your clothes.
“Yes ma’am.” He mumbled, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your neck.
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theeternalwombtarot · 1 year ago
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what will your marriage be like 💍
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I’d been thinking about how much humans fight and disagree but the one thing we have in common is the love we share for things around us. For people in our lives. We have wars, we fall into different categories politically, we have different souls purposes, we have different needs, different desires. But most often, what we do share, what we all desire is to love and to be loved. So anyways, here’s the reading for today. I’m working on trying to crimp out two readings a day or within the week.
***
i.
channelled music 🎵:
There Is Something on Your Mind- Big Jay McNeely
Misty- Ella Fitzgerald
At Last- Beyoncé’s cover from the Cadillac record’s soundtrack
I Wonder Why- Dion & The Belmonts
Stormy Weather- Etta James
A Sunday Kind Of Love- Etta James
Channeled locations 📍: Vancouver, New Orleans, San Francisco, New York city, Maine, South Carolina, Seattle
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I see this being a marriage with someone you knew in the past whom you had a true love with that you may have had to walk away from or put down for a while in the name of growth or internal alignment. Like right person wrong time. Of course that doesn’t exist spiritually because all the time is the right time, divine timing is always right but you know what I mean. I see happiness and genuine joy within this marriage with this person. I see two people celebrating their marriage and their love and what it took to get them there every single day of their lives together like you know that drake song where he says “it might not mean nothing to y’all, but understand nothing was done for me, so I don’t plan on stopping at all, I want this sh*t forever.” The two of you put a lot of work in for yourselves for this connection, this connection was divinely orchestrated. All the pain, all the hardship, all the separation was for the greater good so you guys can grow and have the divine love you wanted.
Everyone’s gonna be looking at the two of you. I see you guys glowing, I see the two of you rising to success in each-others love and in each-others presence. There’s so much self love and confidence between the two of you. It’s giving power couple, it’s giving when two people in a connection are very attractive and have a lot going for themselves. Everyone wants to look at them, everyone wants in on their connection and the love they share, everyone aspires to have that one day. I’m hearing Beyoncé, “so many people that I know, they just tryna touch ya. Kiss up, and rub up, and feel up on ya. Give you some time to prove that I can trust you again I’m gonna kiss up, and rub up, and feel up, kiss up, and rub up and feel up on ya”
I get heavy feminine energy within this group. Some of you are involved with a masculine or this masculine from your past is someone who is very desired or that people will desire even more when you guys come together and wed. This masculine could’ve been someone who clung to romantic/sexual company in his past for some time out of insecurity with me getting something from Beyoncé’s lyrics about getting time to prove she can trust someone again so she can really love on them and I think that’s kind of the energy of this connection. The two of you rising out of karmic cycles and habits and finally growing up and coming out of the storm to be the people you two need for each other and being able to share the most divine love and forgive the past and have peace.
Yea, the king of cups is coming out, this is my favorite masculine in tarot. This is a masculine whose caring and compassionate and loving. Emotionally in tune, in connection with his own inner feminine. He’s the embodiment of a healed water sign masc lover in my opinion. Some of you could want a water sign partner or have water in your own chart and need someone who can appeal to your needs in that way. And this is going to be the relationship, open, caring, gentle, and supportive and this person will be that as well. I see this marriage or this union being a personal celebration for you pile one, maybe even for your significant other as well. You guys have worked so hard and this is your reward or your personal idea of success and fulfillment to be with this person and share a life with eachother.
All the stagnancy, all the pain, will be gone from your lives and from this connection. You guys struggled individually and as a collective and I hear spirit saying that now you deserve someone to be happy and abundant with. This person is gonna be really good in bed as well, their going to keep you over the top satisfied. I see you guys having very passionate and loving s*x lives and maybe even potentially creating a large family together. Like if you’ve ever seen queen Charlotte where she’s telling her kids that her and George created all the many children they had all by themselves without any help. You guys give queen Charlotte and king George vibes. Love is so deep and real and unconditional despite obstacles or obvious flaws within one another. You love eachother through it all. Regardless of it all and that’s all that matters. Go watch queen Charlotte on Netflix if you haven’t man. Ugh. It’s so good.
Yess, this ten of Pentacles upright here speaking of wealth, long term success, and family !!! I see you guys becoming very wealthy together as well, being able to give your children and yourselves good, long, prosperous lives. So beautiful. You and this person may end up having a lot of children together as well. I see you guys getting to work. Someone carries the energy of the empress, or the divine mother here. You could have a cancer moon or some prominent cancer placements in your chart. This person is gonna load you up, keep you pregnant like clock work. Everyone is gonna be tired of y’all like damn do you really need another baby shower this year too.
Overall success and abundance with this ace of pentacles proud and upright. Very good.
***
ii.
channeled music 🎵:
Drunk In Love- Beyoncé
Adorn- Miguel
Tennessee Whiskey - Chris Stapleton
Ooo Baby Baby- Smokey Robinson & the miracles
channeled locations 📍: Texas, Little Rock Arkansas, California, Alabama, Connecticut, North Dakota, New Hampshire, Georgia, Philadelphia, Country sides and suburbs,, Canada
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You may meet this person at a rough time in your life or at a time where you may have isolated yourself from others or stepped into some sort of hermit mode. This could be after some sort of heart break or some type of significant life experience that causes a lot of insecurity and self limiting beliefs to come to the surface to be purged or be removed. A dark night of the soul or some sort of right of passage towards your ascension with this eight of swords upright speaking of negative thoughts and imposed restriction here. I’m getting this pain or this isolation and hurt may be caused by your spouse or your significant other. But there’s a lot of change and transformation here with the death card upright. Cycles ending. There’s a lot of mixed energy here for this part of the collective. I’m getting some of you may be coming out of rough relationships and being burned repeatedly in love and mistreated and pushed into a path of learning and healing and some of you may end up marrying someone or are married to someone who doesn’t have good intentions towards you and that you may separate from and grow into yourselves because of.
You may have an astrology placements that indicate complications and love and long term relationships. You could potentially get married early and get divorced due to turbulence or general just lack of happiness and harmony within your marriage. But whatever this downfall is or whatever this drama or turbulence is will lead you down the path of releasing limiting self beliefs and embarking on your own personal spiritual journey and path to self love which will bring in a greater love and a true love for you later in life when the time is right here. This person that you’ll find yourself married or committed to in the beginning, some type of truth will come out about them that will lead to this not working out.
But, this new love that blossom and come from your ending in your first connection or marriage will further propel you into soul searching and really finding out who you are and becoming secure in yourself here. This is going to be someone whose going to benefit you, whose going to compliment you and push you to be a better person and continue to heal and improve. You could have similar chart placements as Ariana grande or relate to her love life in some way. She’s known for having somewhat of a turbulent love life or to have issues within her personal relationships.
***
iii.
channeled music 🎵:
Valerie - Amy winehouse
Beggin’ - Maneskin
Hey ya - outkast
Milk - Kings of Leon
Creep - Radiohead
Cherry wine - Hozier
Ho Hey - The Lumineers
channeled locations 📍: Brooklyn, Chicago, San Diego, San Francisco, Colorado, Oregon, St. Helens Oregon, Washington, New York City, Long Beach California
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I’m getting that some of your are masculine energies, masculine energy dominant or are literally men lol. I keep hearing over and over the opening lyrics to Hey ya by OutKast.
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The song Hey Ya is a really chaotic and high energy song we all know that but there’s an artist on TikTok who has a beautiful soft cover of the song and i feel like it really captures the energy I’m getting from these lyrics. Link to her TikTok.
You could marry someone you feel really anxious or worried about your connection with. I hear someone worried about losing their person or losing this person in particular. Many of you will marry someone you know already or someone who plays a massive part in your life or who shaped what love means and what love meant for you. Spirit is telling me that this person and this connection was given to you to to you to test your strength and push you to become the person you were meant to be become all along because this person inspires you to grow and go the extra mile in life.
This person gives you hope, you may feel as though your purpose in life is to love this person because they inspire you so heavily. This person may trigger some sort of spiritual awakening for you or lead you down a journey of self discovery and soul searching as well. I see this person teaching you and allowing you to release your fears and open up your heart. Someone’s heart chakra could be blocked or has been closed off for a long time due to trauma and other issues. This marriage with this person will be full of clear communication, in depth conversations, and clear and healthy boundaries and ideas. This person could create a safe space for you or a safe environment. I see you and this person becoming an example of what a harmonious and healthy relationship is meant to look like. You out of anybody knows what it feels like to be in unhealthy relationships or have a turbulent and draining relationship dynamic with someone I’m hearing and this is not that. This relationship will be a breath of fresh air for you.
I see you being someone who is anxious in energy or is prone to pessimistic ideas or thinking due to your anxiety as well. Like the second something positive happens with this person especially if you know this person already your mind finds a way to push you away from them out of fear of becoming too comfortable or too vulnerable and then leaving you or pulling away from you but I don’t see this with this person with the four of wands upright. This person loves you unconditionally, you can’t lose something that’s unconditionally. That’s gentle and that doesn’t judge you or intend to hurt you the way that people may have in the past.
I’m hearing it took someone a while to come forward and take the leap of faith to pursue this relationship because they couldn’t decide if they were worth this persons love and time or if they were strong enough to handle this person rejecting you or walking away from you because you felt that they would and that they would wake up one day and realize that they don’t want you anymore or feel burdened by you. But I see you looking at this connection when you guys are married and the rough part of the push and pull that you feel in regards to this person blows over and you being proud and abundant because this relationship is long term, steady, and giving.
This person is made for you, your relationship and connection is very divinely protected and orchestrated pile three. And all of this will be revealed to you more and more as years progress within this marriage here. You and this person are incredibly connected on an intuitive and spiritual level you share so much love and compassion for one another as well. You think yourself less than this person or someone who doesn’t deserve this persons love and presence and that’s simply not true. I hear spirit saying if anyone deserves this person, if anyone is made for this person, if anyone deserves a love or connection like this it’s you.
**
That’s it, lol I might take a break from love readings for a moment because the collective is very steady and my readings can often be repetitive but many of people within the collective are about to get married or be in the most divine love within their life. A good amount of the collective is still learning what love means and it may take them a while to find that but otherwise everyone is exactly where they’re meant to be. 💕
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weebsinstash · 9 months ago
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Hello! I don’t know if you do this but I was wondering what your thoughts were for a Yandere Lucifer Morningstar from Hazbin Hotel? I’m having trouble writing a good representation of him and would like some advice.
Honestly I'm gonna humble myself and say that it took reading someone else's post to make me like, REALLY notice the nuances of Lucifer's character
This post right here literally made me rewatch his scenes and go "oh wow he IS like DANGEROUSLY DEPRESSED"
He doesn't remember Charlie told him where she is, or what she's doing, and he can barely follow a conversation despite clearly trying to pay attention. He also just seems kind of scattered, and um, HE LITERALLY MAKES A JOKE ABOUT DYING FROM FALLING OFF THE HOTEL BALCONY like dude is making jokes about death in front of his fucking daughter, like my dudes, I think this guy is BARELY holding himself together
He clearly loves loves LOVES Charlie but he doesn't really know how to properly articulate himself and I have a feeling there's a lot he's concealing from her, and another big question is, is his depression from being cast out of Heaven, or from something to do with his missing wife, or a combination of both? Either way this man is clearly dealing with like, really bad issues. And Charlie also mentioned he wasn't around a whole lot when she was younger, so... did he have depression back then too?
So, that all said, I feel like a yandere Lucifer would almost be, potentially invigorated by his darling? Given a new lease on life? He may not be 100% his old self again but, you get him to like, 65, maybe 70% on a good day. You give him another reason to get out of bed in the morning, or afternoon, or evening or, whenever he can drag his depressed ass out of bed
Given what we currently know, I feel like a romantic yandere Lucifer would pretend to only be platonic and do his best to poorly conceal his feelings because of his whole... "can't ask his missing wife if it's ok for you to be their third" ordeal, the man still wears his wedding ring, and a platonic yandere Lucifer basically adopts you like another kid, because uh, I mean for one he apparently canonically missed a lot of Charlie's childhood, and he's also an ancient fallen angel, so he's got that age advantage on you no matter how old you are. I mean what are a few decades when he's literally thousands upon thousands upon thousands--you get the idea
Yandere Lucifer would want to stay close to you, helping watch over you, maaaaaybe being overly paranoid about you randomly disappearing and going missing For Very Obvious Reasons, and in the process he winds up being unintentionally overbearing. I mean, he did it in irritation, but he basically showed up at Charlie's hotel immediately saying it was a dump and all of HER FRIENDS were 'a bunch of losers'. He never completely pulls his punches when there's something he's displeased with, even if it has something to do with someone he loves, so his darling would get much of the same treatment. "Ohhhhh, you uh, you wanted to move across the city? That's, um, definitely a fun idea! BuuuuuUuuut, what IF, instead of doing that--", like, he tries to playfully tug you in 'the right direction' until you make him put his foot down
Hmmm... what would him losing his cool look like... well, we've already seen that he doesn't mind throwing hands and WILL KILL, but will stop if he's asked to or there's a good reason. With you, though, you're not typically going to be there to stop him from offing any rivals or bad influences, so I imagine he'd be kinda casual about it, actually! He already thinks pretty lowly of Sinners, so say he finds out you've been ditching him and Charlie to go out drinking with strangers, making new friends, maybe having a few one night stands? Yeah, some of those people definitely aren't calling you back, and Lucifer doesn't really see a problem with it. These people are kind of the worst and really don't deserve you, anyways! If anything he's helping clean up Hell for you and his daughter and keeping you safe :)
Losing his cool with YOU... I think would involve him using his powers to finally confine you, maybe even going demon mode to intimidate you into submission in a very dad-esque "now you listen HERE" kind of way. We don't really know the scope and scale of his powers but I can picture him at least being, obviously much stronger than he looks, and transforming to fly you "back home" where he puts you in your room where no one can reach you without his explicit permission (and you also can't leave~)
One second you're just drunk and jokingly defying him, teasing him, maybe even picking him up and swinging him around because you're bigger than him, to you he's just a silly little guy! Meanwhile this Grown Ass Man Who Is Also The Actual Devil is getting more than just a little frustrated you basically view him as a wacky little cartoon more than a grown man, one who has had sex and has had two wives and sired a child. You're just teasing him and stumbling around drunk when he's trying to get you to your hotel room to get to bed to sleep, like you're clearly not taking him seriously, maybe even playfully putting your hands on him (TOTALLY not riling him up in 'fun' ways) and he finally just huffs and snaps his fingers and, you're suddenly magic'd to bed! You're laying there blinking confused and he's tucking you in and chuckling that "you're such a handful!" before leaving you to sleep and somehow INSTANTLY knowing when you're up.
You ARE in his house, after all...
Not to be gross but uh..... I'm not saying "yandere Lucifer who has the power to still get a Sinner pregnant if he wanted to and you wind up fooling around with him and you're waking up with his little apple symbol on your lower tummy as one of those like hentai womb tattoos to show you're pregnant" but uhhhhhhhhhhyeah that's what I'm saying, and whether it was accidentally or intentionally, he's keeping it, and thus, keeping YOU
I just feel like he'd be very goofy and awkward and bad at hiding his feelings and being very clearly overprotective and jealous in ways everyone else but you manages to pick up on (god Alastor would have some MATERIAL) and, in a romantic/sexual setting he eventually just loses his patience with you not seeing him as a man and just gets... progressively more forward. You pop back into the Hotel after a night out and Lucifer's already hammered at the bar with Husk, stumbling up to you, hanging off of you, slurring and embarrassing himself, "You'reeeee SO pretty... like SO pretty.... do you wanna have *BELCH* you wanna fuck? Cause I LOVE to fuck, like when I FUCKED my wife to make my DAUGHTER, my wife and daughter that I have, 'cuz im a DAD, 'cuz I'm a MAN!" and you're just giggling and ruffling his hair, "You're so weird, dude ^^" and walking away while Lucifer internally screams, wondering just how DIRECT with you he's going to have to be
meanwhile Charlie is totally cool with all of this and sees this as a weird double whammy of Curing Dad's Depression + new family member and friend hurray! and she's totally actively either shipping you with her dad or aiding and abetting him in his weird attempts to absorb you into the Morningstar family
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agaypanic · 1 year ago
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Hi!! I absolutely LOVE your James Maguire series! We really don’t have enough James love on the internet. Is it ok if I request a James Maguire x reader oneshot set just after the camping trip episode? Where they still go to the caravan and all the teens have to put the beds together and squeeze in one room and no one wants to sleep next to James so reader ends up there and they wake up cuddling? The others probably make fun of them so bad lmao (Maybe like a little extra from the fella series??) 🥺thank you so much if you do, I had this idea and I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. If you don’t write it I understand thank you anyway xxxx
Squished (James Maguire X Quinn!Reader)
Masterlist
Request Something!
Summary: A stolen tent means less room. But the Derry Girls make do.
A/N: I’m gonna be posting this as a stand alone (so not on the fella masterlist), but I’m gonna write it using the stuff from the fella part 5. So this can be read by itself or as like a lil extra thing from the fella
***
It was a long while before the Derry Girls arrived in Portnoo. After hours of being squished in two cars, harboring what was most likely a fugitive, and getting Grandpa Joe’s friend’s second-best tent stolen, seeing the caravan felt like seeing Mother Mary herself. The only thing that stopped Y/n from rolling out of the car the second she spotted it was her baby sister, who had sat in her lap the entire journey.
“Oh, thank fuck.” Michelle almost yelled as everyone poured out of the cars. Erin gave her a remark about her crude language, in front of her family no less, but was ignored. “I’m allowed to be upset, Erin. I just lost the love of my life and was stuck in a car with you and your kookie aunt for God knows how long.”
“You didn’t even know him, Michelle. He was a criminal.”
Y/n handed her sister Anna off to James so she could get out of the car and stretch her stiff limbs. She tried to ignore the sight of James holding Anna because he seemed nervous to hold her but was still trying to entertain her while he waited for Y/n. It was just too cute.
“Okay, I can take her.” Y/n sighed, reaching out for her sister. James looked at her a little funny.
“Are you sure? You held her the entire trip up here; you don’t want a little break?” She supposed he was right, and she’d be lying if she said she didn’t like how he acted with her interest in mind.
“I mean if you don’t mind-”
“Of course not.” James smiled at her, and she would’ve been giddy if Erin and Michelle weren’t there. Anna babbled against James’ shoulder, grasping at his jacket. The two teens smiled at her, talking to each other while Erin eyed them, not that they noticed.
“No wonder Emmett thought she was their wain,” Erin muttered to herself as she grabbed her suitcase out of the car’s boot. She didn’t know whether to be disgusted or happy for her sister and the fact that she fancied their English friend.
***
“Jesus, it’s cramped in here.” Michelle groaned as she squeezed past the girls to throw her bag somewhere in the caravan the Quinn family had rented. They only rented one; they didn’t expect Erin and Y/n’s friends to accompany them on their annual holiday. Grandpa Joe, Gerry, and James were going to sleep in the tent that Joe’s friend had lent them, but those plans had gone south. But Joe insisted that they should still sleep outside.
“We’re men, aren’t we?” He had said. “We don’t need no damn tent.”
But one look at James, and the girls knew that wouldn’t work out well. He was already nervous around Joe and Gerry, mainly Joe, especially because he was the one who allowed Emmett to steal their tent. But living outdoors with them for who knows how long? No thanks.
The adults had gone to a close-by shop that sold camping gear to get another tent for them to sleep in. Grandpa Joe almost had a heart attack when the girls suggested that James sleep in the caravan with them, but then Mary calmed him down by saying that the girls would be fine because James was gay.
James was getting sick of correcting this assumption. But he didn’t want to sleep in a tent with the adults, so he let it slide.
“Okay, how are we doing this?” Y/n asked, looking at the somewhat cramped space. The girls’ things were either thrown somewhere in the caravan or clutched closely to try to create more room. Everyone looked around. “I know there’s a bed at the end.”
“I call it!” Michelle yelled, pushing past everyone to sit on the bed before anyone else could claim it. She looked smug, probably thinking that she wouldn’t have to share with anyone else.
“Fine.” Y/n sighed, moving Anna to her other hip. She was charged with looking after her while the adults were gone. James was going to offer to carry her, but then decided to take their luggage. “But you have to room with someone else in that bed.”
“What the fuck, Y/n?!” Michelle snarled.
“Look around you, Michelle.” James defended. “There’s six of us in here.” Michelle rolled her eyes at her cousin. Huffing in annoyance, she looked at everyone in the caravan.
“Fine. Clare, you’re with me, yeah?”
“Two down, four to go,” Y/n muttered, looking around. “There’s the two seats in the front, and then the sofa could probably fit two.”
“I’ll take the sofa.” James volunteered, moving to set his bag on it, but still holding Y/n’s for when she decided where to sleep. Erin smirked.
“Orla and I call the seats!” Y/n would’ve glared at Erin if she wasn’t in a room with James and Michelle. She had a sneaking suspicion of what Erin was planning. 
“Is that okay with you, Y/n?” James asked. He was still holding her bag, in case she had reservations about sharing a sleeping space with him and wanted to switch with someone else. 
“Yeah.” Y/n nodded, watching James smile as he dropped her bag next to his. “Fine with me, James.”
“Aye, James, it must be exciting to finally have a girl in your bed.”
“Shut up, Michelle!”
***
It was late at night when the girls finally decided to go to bed. They had spent most of their time talking about this and that or playing games. Everyone bid each other good night and went to their sleeping areas.
“So, how should we do this?” James asked Y/n quietly. Their gazes kept going between the sofa and each other, trying to figure out what to do. “I can sleep on the floor if you’d like. I’m fine with it.”
“No, James. Don’t be silly.” Y/n bit her lip, trying to figure out how to fit the two of them in this tiny space. “We could lay on our sides.”
It became awkward very fast. The two faced each other, noses almost bumping. They were stiff, trying not to disturb the other. Y/n tried to fix this by turning around so they wouldn’t face each other. She must’ve forgotten how small the sofa was because James reached an arm out to stop her from falling to the floor.
“Careful,” James said, arm wrapped around her waist to pull her further from the edge. Y/n couldn’t ignore the butterflies in her stomach, somewhat surprised that James had the strength to pull her. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” She replied meekly, grateful it was dark so James wouldn’t see the blush on her cheeks even though he was so close to her.
“Want me to let go?” His grip loosened slightly, but she caught his hand before it could leave her.
“No!” Y/n cringed at how loud she was. “I mean, uh, if you don’t mind.” James’ arm settled around her.
“Of course not.” He adjusted himself slightly before letting out a deep sigh. “Good night, Y/n.”
“Good night, James.”
***
“Why is he all over her like that?” Michelle grimaced, joining the crowd of her friends. They all stood before the small sofa, looking down at a sleeping Y/n and James. In his sleep, James had wrapped both arms around Y/n and kept her close to his chest. She didn’t seem to mind, holding her hands on his to prevent him from moving. “Fucking disgusting.”
“Quiet, Michelle,” Clare whispered as Y/n stirred. When she stopped her movements, the group let out a breath of relief they didn’t realize they were holding. “You know what we should do?” Seeming to read her mind, Erin slipped her shoes on.
“I’ll go get Mammy’s camera.”
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dckweed · 11 months ago
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THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND ➺ bob floyd
summary: In which bob floyd gets himself into a bit of a pickle and calls on his hot, recently single neighbor to help him out, the situation is mutually beneficial..in more ways than one.
warnings: fake dating, violence, domestic violence mentioned, nicknames, slowburn, eventual smut.
this is an x reader fic where reader is referred to as sunshine or sunny as a nickname, also i know the moodboard is a lil wonky no one say anything im gonna fix it! i made it on my phone half asleep lmao.
part one: here
PART TWO - THE FAKE INSTAGRAM
After the whole fiasco of snorting water out of your nose and scaring the poor man half to death, Bob insists on taking you to the quaint coffee shop on the corner of the street you guys lived on, just a few steps away from the front doors of the apartment building. Reluctantly, you agree, curious to know more about the predicament your neighbor had gotten himself into. He lets you have a few minutes to throw a cropped zip up hoodie over yourself, and a baseball cap to help shade the still slightly visible bruise on your face before you meet him in the hallway. He had clipped Cosie to her leash and the excited little furball was yipping excitedly when you stepped out of your home, closing the door behind you. 
“Hi Cosie baby!” You say excitedly, your voice sweeter than honey as you crouched down to her level to excitedly scratch her behind the ears like she loved. “You being a good girl for your dad?” You ask teasingly, you knew she could never be bad, and Bob practically treated her like a princess anyway. 
“Always is..” Bob says, his accent drawling out a few of the syllables in a way that you just loved to hear. God, you thought to yourself, this man could record an audio book and have everyone swooning.  “You ready?” 
You smile, straightening up. “Yeah, lets go..” 
He was truly a gentleman you noted, he held the door to the apartment building, and the coffee shop for you as if it was second nature, only humming in response to your simple thank you, and when he pulled the chair out for you at the small table on their outdoor patio, you hoped that he didn’t notice the blush on your neck and face. Were you really so used to guys that were such brutes that you got flustered by basic acts of kindness? He hadn’t argued with you too much on paying for your own drink, letting you do it after a small squabble..or maybe you really didn’t give him a choice..you had already payed with your phone while you were arguing before he had even gotten his wallet out of his back pocket. 
“So,” You say as he sits across from you, looping Cosie’s leash to the more shaded side of the table. “Can you elaborate on the whole girlfriend thing for me?” Now it was him who was turning red. 
He fidgets awkwardly with his hot, black coffee for a moment, those eyebrows knit tightly together again. He clears his throat before he speaks. “I kind of..already told all of my friends that we’re dating.” He says, you lean back in the chair, your head tilted slightly towards the sun as you listen to him. You enjoyed the warmth on your face.“I..i don’t know what came over me..we were all drinking, and they said something about dating it somehow turned to me..and i just..i’m so tired of Hangman and his fucking manwhore whorier than thou attitude and always teasing me for not going on dates all  the time..” 
“So you told them you were dating someone?” You ask, seeing where the story was going. You could tell that the story alone was irritating him by the was his hand clenched around his coffee cup and the tightness around his mouth, the tick in his jaw. You wondered how long he had been putting up with this ‘Hangman’ guy. 
Bob nods. “And then they asked her name, and at the time the only thing i could come up with quickly enough to not seem suspicious was Sunny..so..” You laugh a little bit, this man was adorable, and obviously gentle even though he was clearly upset by what he was talking about. You liked that about him, you decided. 
How could you not help him? And really, what could it hurt? “How long would you need me to be your girlfriend for?” You ask, bringing the straw of your iced latte to your lips, moaning softly as the heavy caramel flavor hit your tongue. You could drink it forever. You see his body sag a little at your words, a little more relaxed. 
“Just long enough to make it believable.” He states, eyeing you from across the table. Cosie’s cold nose pokes your leg and you happily reach down and scratch her head, giving the little baby all the attention she wanted. “A couple of nights out with my friends, obviously, and im sure Nat will want to hang out with you one on one..” He says, actually thinking of the scenarios that would most likely take place. “A couple of official work events, probably, I would say, a few months..” 
You turn your attention back to him, lips pursed. A few months? That would land you around the beginning of the year..through Christmas..you had agreed to go home for the holiday’s this year. You arched a brow as you thought. It would look good if you brought a man home to your family, especially a man like Bob, they would swoon all over him..you wouldn’t have to spend the whole week hearing your grandmother tell you that you should be married already, or have a family like your brother and sister.. “Okay, i’ll help you out, but only if the fake boyfriend thing can be used in my favor too..” You say. He nods immediately. “So..rules?” 
The two of you talk for a couple of hours at the coffee shop, the little table filled with the occasional laughter as you talked about rules of the arrangement, and what would need to be done. Later on you found yourself on one side of your couch, Bob on the other as the two of you tried to work out a schedule. 
“Can you meet with me and the crew at our usual bar tomorrow night?” He asks, looking up from his phone at you. Natasha and Jake were blowing up the group chat about meeting you and it was slowly driving him insane. He had about forty text messages from this morning until right that moment. 
You shake your head. :”I have work tomorrow night, but i’m off Monday.” You say, looking up from your own phone. You had been texting your sister about your plans for the Holidays. “My sister wants to know where you’re from, and what you do and i dont think she’ll take ‘navy dude’ as an answer” Bob looks at you, slightly offended. 
“Navy dude?” He asks, setting his phone down for just a moment. “Sunny, i’m not just a ‘navy dude’, i’m a weapons system officer. I control the weapons and radar in multi million dollar government aircraft.” He looked completely offended by your terminology and you struggled to hold in a giggle at the way he was explaining his official job title to you. “..and I’m from Montana.” 
“That explains the accent.” You say, texting your sister back.
Bob scoffs. “Accent?” He’d never been told he had an accent before. “Where are you from? This is basic stuff we should probably know about each other if we want people to believe this, you know?” You hummed in response, he was definitely right. “Also, Phoenix wants to know what your instagram is..” 
“Well, that depends on how much you want your friends to know about me.” You say, setting your phone down to look at him. He looks up at you, eyebrows furrowed again. You have the sudden urge to reach across the damn couch and smooth the area with your thumb, but you resist. “Don’t look at me like that, you know what i mean. Are they the judgemental type?” He opens his mouth, as if to protest and say no, but then closes it and gives a slight nod. “Okay, so fake insta it is.” 
It was a good thing you already had a fake instagram account for your grandmother and other family members because it made it a hell of alot easier for you. “A fake instagram? Won’t they think something is weird if it doesn’t have any pictures of us together on it?” He asks, not fully sure of your plan. You roll your eyes and maneuver yourself so you’re laying in Bob’s lap, looking directly up at him. 
His entire body goes stiff and you can’t tell if its from surprise or from being uncomfortable with your proximity, but you don’t move and after a few moments his thigh muscles untense. He smells good, you realize as you breathe in slightly. “My fake account isn’t exactly fake, okay?” You say, opening the instagram app on your phone and switching it to your second profile. “It’s just not the one I use mainly that i post on for my friends or well, if you were actually my boyfriend, you, to see..” 
“Then what is the point of it?” He asks looking down at you, his accent flowing smoothly through you. His voice was a little quieter now that you were so close to him, and in all honesty you didn’t mind it one bit. 
You chuckle, giving him your phone so he can scroll through it. “I normally use it for my grandma and other family members, so they won’t have a damn heart attack..they already don’t like my line of work, there’s no need to go killing them with some pictures.” Bob hums in response, scrolling through a few of the posts. “It’s the extremely tame version of my main account.”
His phone pings again and he grunts, rolling his eyes. Before he can even try to hand you your own back, you grab his off the arm of the couch above you and thank god that it was already unlocked. You gasp at the text. “Hangman wants proof that im a real girl and not just a figment of your imagination.” You say, an idea coming to mind. You roll off of his lap and quickly stand, pulling him by the forearm to his feet as he makes a disgruntled noise. 
You lead him down the small hallway, past your bedroom and into your bathroom (which was thankfully not its usual disastrous mess of makeup and lingerie scattered everywhere). “Okay, stand there..” You grab him by the biceps, shocked at how solid they are because he honestly didn’t seem to be overly buff to you, and position him exactly where you want him. 
“Sunny, what’re we doin’?” He sighs, letting you move him around every which way. He had to admit, he liked the way you grabbed his arms, the way you squeezed at his biceps. He tried not to let his mind linger too much on it though, tried not to notice the way that your fingertips left a trail of goosebumps in their wake every time they lingered anywhere on his bare skin. 
“Taking pictures, duh.” You say as if it should have been obvious. You turn around, satisfied with his position, and face the mirror yourself, positioning his arm around your shoulders and over your chest as you press back against his surprisingly solid body. You weren’t exactly a short person by any means, but there was definitely a noticeable height difference between you and him. Your head just barely cleared his shoulders, his chin able to rest perfectly onto of your head. It made for a cute photo, you thought and you pretended not to notice the goofy smirk on his face as you captured the photo as stealthily as you could, leaning back into his chest as his chin rested on top of your head, his arm over your chest and your hand wrapped around his forearm as you took the picture, acutely aware of his hand just over the waistband of your lululemon pants. 
You hum, thinking about what other positions would be cute enough to send to his friends and post to your fake insta account, you wanted to hard launch him to your family too if you were hard launching to his friends. You turn the camera of his phone front facing, and set it up to take rapid photos on a timer before you abruptly turn around and jump up, locking your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. 
“Smile at me.” You say, as your hand snakes up into his hair. You didn’t really have to though because he was already smiling at you in surprise as you leaned your forehead against his. “I didn’t think you’d be able to hold me.” You giggle suddenly, and the sound makes his smile grow wider as he adjusts his hands so they’re fulling on your ass, supporting you as he drops his head to your shoulder. 
The whole ordeal of the photo session takes about fifteen minutes or so, and when you’re finished you lead him back out into the living room. ���Sorry to jump on you like that, but i had to catch you off guard, i wanted it to look believable.” You say, sitting back down on the couch. He only hums in response, taking a spot next to you as he watches you pick through your favorite photos in his camera roll to text to yourself. 
“You’re awfully good at that,” He ques, watching you edit some of the photos you had sent to your own phone, before you compose an instagram post of the best ones. “I always just take them and post them, i never thought that filters really mattered..” 
You chuckle at the man, shaking your head. “What’s your instagram, bobby?” You ask, using your nickname for him as you type out a caption for the post. 
“Oh, uh,” a slight blush heats up his neck and face and he clears his throat before responding. “It’s @thewizzo ..natasha actually came up with the handle.” You type it into your caption, eyebrows furrowed. You’re about to ask him what the hell a wizzo is when he answers it for you. “It’s uh, well, sometimes its a nickname, or another acronym for WSO..” 
“Oh, snazzy..” You say showing him the post. It was a series of four photos and a small, but cute caption.
“Is it Bobby approved?” You ask. He gives you an affirmative nod and you hit the post button, knowing it would only be a matter of minutes before your sister and brother blow up your phone. “Okay, well, here’s to our fake relationship!” You say, attaching the photo of Bob holding you with his hands on your ass to a text with your instagram handle and sending it to his friends group chat. 
The phone pings before you’ve even handed it back to him. 
Hangman: holy fuck she’s real.  Phee: shut up you moron, im following her rn!!  Rooster: …wait i thought i was imagining this conversation last night Payback: oh, shit..way to go Bob!!
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taglist!
@mamachasesmayhem @hangmandruigandmav @shotgunhallelujah @shiara04 @3tabbiesandalab @tgmreader @flrboyd @goosterroose @mrspedropascal5683 @sugajar
@dory-98 @justherebecausesafarisucks
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catfern · 1 year ago
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nsfw alphabet w abby
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pairing: abby anderson x reader
music: change (in the house of flies) - deftones
word count: 2.8k
warnings: language, oral sex (r! receiving), masturbation, strap usage, knife kink (brief!), just general nsfw MINORS DNI! AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!!!
an: so i rlly did leave omg. none of my stuff is showing up in tags :( oh well gonna keep posting anyway! love ya babes
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Abby is a caring person. Even though she loves to play rough, and pretty much absolutely wreck your body in the name of giving you (or herself) pleasure, she’s always checking on you afterwards, even if its just a quick ‘hey, how you holding up?’ before disappearing to do something. If she has more time, she’ll take the care to look you over, ‘assess the damage’, partially because she was worried she got too rough, mostly because she likes seeing the aftermath of what you let her do to you. If she degraded you during sex, she’ll make sure to tell you how wonderful you did, how good you were. She loves when, after a particularly loud night, she can watch you try and stumble your way to the bathroom, watching the aftermath of her. How much you struggle, she debates making you walk a flight of stairs, with your painful throbbing cunt and numb legs, just to watch what she really did to you. But no, Abby’s caring. She’ll take it as an excuse to swoop in and curl you in her arms, running you a bath and rubbing her hands up and down your calves.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
abby is a titty girl. I’m making that into a sign. She loves the way your tits bounce when she’s fucking you with the strap, how they feel in the palm of her hand. Plus, they come with the little added side bonus of nipples that she can tease. If you’re out together, she’ll casually let a hand brush over it one too many times, while her arm is hanging on your shoulder, feeling you perk up underneath her fingers.
She’s a big fan of her thighs. I mean, she does put an INCREDIBLE amount of work into them, not particularly for sex but you know, it’s definitely motivational to see you straddle her thigh, desperate for friction and roping your legs around her, grinding into the tone of the muscle she spends hours working on. She likes to use them to tease you, brushing them in between your legs when she pins you on a wall, or hugs you from behind.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Watching you come is a special, special treat. Tasting you is even better. Feeling how wet you get just from something like a brush of her fingers, or a whisper in your ear, and then listening to you come and feeling it like velvet on her fingers is an obsession.
She also really likes it when she comes on you. Most of the time, she initiates when you eat her out, and it makes her feel incredibly more powerful and possessive to see your mouth covered in her cum on her command.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
It’s not really a secret, because she’s not interested in wasting time fucking around, but she loves watching you masturbate. It’s something she didn’t expect, but walking in on you once without you noticing did the trick. She’ll tease you, lead your hands down to your pussy while whispering into your ear.
Look at you, pretty girl. So desperate. Come on baby, show me how you like it.
Really? Come on, you can do better than that.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Abby isn’t that experienced in terms of how many people she’s fucked before you, but that doesn’t mean she’s lost. It didn’t take her long to figure you out, what you like, how you like to feel her, and she milks it.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Abby is definitely all for doggy style. When she’s fucking you with the strap (which is her favourite way to fuck you, watching you melt around her), she’s naturally dominant, pressing you into the pillows, ass up, back arched, it gives her the best view, watching your hands helplessly reach at the sheets, moaning and drooling onto the pillow as she absolutely fucking destroys you. She fucks you at a visceral pace.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Abby is naturally dominant, she enjoys having control, especially over you, when you’re vulnerable and needy and wanting. She’s very serious about it, very meticulous and detailed about how exactly she unravels you, again and again, particularly on days when you need reminding who’s in charge.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
I mean, it is the apocalypse. Grooming isn’t exactly a first priority, but her dad was a doctor, so hygiene is high up on her list, trimming back only the necessary. She takes the time occasionally, very occasionally, to look nice for you, clean up properly and give you easy access when she’s perched on the edge of the bed, pushing you down onto your knees and holding your head to her cunt. 
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Abby will be romantic if you want her to be, and on rough days when she needs to be with you, simply needs to touch you, she’ll run her hands gently over the sculpt of your hips and kiss you tenderly.  Even in these moments though, she has her place and you have yours. A hand around the back of your neck, or tussled in your hair to hold you in place, her forearm gently pressing into your stomach to hold you down while she feels you. She can’t treat you right if you don’t do exactly what she wants.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Abby’s rarely away from you, and even when she is, she likes to wait. Release isn’t something she very often needs without you. Doesn’t mean she likes to watch you, desperate on your own fingers. Maybe you know she’s there, maybe not. Maybe she’ll run a hand up your neck, lips on your tits, another hand tracing the inside of your thigh. She’s nice when you touch yourself, she’s encouraging.
That’s it, baby.
Good girl. That feel good? That what you like?
She won’t ever let you finish though. That’s a privilege she reserves for herself.
Ah, not yet. Slow down, pretty girl. we’ve got all the time in the world.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Abby is definitely a bit of an exhibitionist. She’s cocky, a show off, and she knows you’re beautiful. She knows she’s not the only one who thinks about you. She’s not jealous though, she doesn’t mind a pair of wandering eyes, as long as those wandering eyes watch as she palms your tits, leaves her marks all over your body. As long as they see you unravelling on her fingers, and no one else’s. You’re hers.
KNIFE KINK!! General power play, with the woman who spends all her evenings in the gym fine-tuning her strength, but fuck, pinning you down with only a knife at your throat, the confident promise that no, babygirl, I won’t cut you, as she knicks your panties off with the very end of the blade. She’s simply too good at her job to fuck up with a knife.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Abby’s very public, as said before. She loves the idea of getting caught, of being watched. She enjoys a good alley, maybe the bathroom of the restaurant you’re in.
Sometimes though, she’s not a big fan of just how many people could watch. You are hers, after all, so she’ll pull you away to your place, lock the doors, fuck you in every room. She’ll tell you to be loud though, she wants people to hear.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
God, what doesn’t? Abby’s sex drive is HIGH, like higher than the hills high. Anywhere you are, she can just imagine fucking you there, having her way with you.
But she loves when you’re a tease. She enjoys the chase, she enjoys the smug look on your face when you think you’ve got her pinned down. Oh, baby. Things are only just going to get so much worse if you keep it up.
You wear that just for me, pretty girl? Yeah, you did.
You really had to act all bratty in front of my friends? No, no talking until we get home. I’ll deal with you then.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Abby isn’t big on giving up control, big surprise. She’s in charge, that’s a non-negotiable. You like it that she knows exactly what to do to make you feel good, so there’s no point being a brat about it. She knows every inch of you like the creases of her palms, so you pretending that you want control is just a waste of time.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
GOD. Abby eats u out like she’s starved, like she’s been wandering in the desert and you’re the first bite of a melon at an oasis. Groaning, GROWLING, swearing into your cunt like a fucking animal, she loves the taste of you more than she actually likes food. She’s sloppy, but not messy. Grazing her teeth along your clit because she knows you’re sensitive, running her tongue along your slit with a precision pressure, she knows exactly how to get you to squirm.
Receiving is a completely different story. Abby isn’t quite a stone top, but she’s a lot more closed off when it comes to herself, so it’s not just something she throws around to any of her random fucks. That type of vulnerable position is something Abby longs for only occasionally, and only with someone that she trusts.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Abby is fast, and a bit of a show-off really. She loves overstimulating you, never letting up her pace whether she’s fucking you with the strap, her fingers, or pressing her tongue into your clit. It’s a show of power, how long she can go without slipping even the slightest. To be honest, it’s a bit of desperation. Her need to be inside you, to be tasting you. It drives her speed, her strength to a height and holds it there. 
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Abby’s philosophy is, wherever she can fuck you, she will fuck you. ‘If there’s a will there’s a way’ type of shit. So, of course, she loves hiking you up against a wall for a quick fuck while out for a drink, taking her frustration out on you in her short break between meetings or patrols, shoving her hands up your pretty new dress when no one is looking. She does like to take her time with you, but when you’re acting up while the two of you are out, five minutes is all she has to remind you of your place.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Abby Anderson likes what she likes, and there’s not much outside the limits. It’ll take a lot of convincing to get her to try something new, especially in the bedroom, and even when she does try something, don’t expect her to stick to it, unless she really really likes it. She’s willing to try a lot of stuff for you, but that doesn’t mean it won’t take some begging on your part to make it happen.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
To be honest, Abby never lets it slip if she ever gets tired. If she does, she hides it incredibly well. She goes and goes and goes, usually her breaking point is when you’re nice and fucked out for her. Tears staining your cheeks, hands red from gripping the sheets or the headboard. She only really lets up when you’ve quieted down, your screams dropping to a tired squeak, your body flat and limp against the sheets. And still, she’s completely stoic, so you could look at her and assume she’d be ready to go for another round or two. 
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
ABBY AND HER STRAP! Besties for life fr. Bottoming out inside you is godly for her, even if you say you can’t take her that far. She likes to see you completely unravel as she goes and goes at top speed, railing into you until that’s the only thing you know. It’s her favourite way to have you, so it’s got a pretty clean spot in the top draw.
She’s also a really big fan of you sucking it off, whether she makes you or not. Hands in your hair, whispering as she looks down at you, spit gathering on your lips and stringing off the tip. Fuck. 
Fuck, baby. Keep looking up at me like that and I’ll have to fuck that pretty little smile off your face. Is that what you want?
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Abby is really straightforward, she’s not the tease in the relationship. When she wants something, she says it, or does it, very rarely asks. She loves when you tease her though, as much as she calls you a brat and gives you a hard time. She loves to teach you a lesson for flaunting yourself, wearing a pretty dress or having bad manners.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Abby is the opposite of loud. In fact, she shows more restraint with herself than she does when she’s got you under her. She only really grunts quietly out of effort as she slides in and out of you, or groans softly when she looks down and you’ve got that ethereal look, your tits bouncing with each thrust and eyes rolling back, your mouth hanging open, perfect for her own, or her fingers.
The only time she’s loud, like I said, is when she’s absolutely devouring your cunt. It makes her mad, all restraint flies out the window. Everyone in the neighbourhood knows what you’re up to when Abby’s head is between your legs.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Abby loves it when you pull her hair… 
I mean, is it a wild card? I don’t know. Is it in character for her? I also don’t know.
But you know.. a lil tug here and there. It really gets her going. That’s all I’m gonna be saying.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
BUFF! WOMEN! Her abs are rlly high up on my list of buff women abs I’d like to be riding.
She works HARD. For you, for her, and just for the ability to have a killer swing should she need to beat anyone up for you. Toned, muscled arms, with hard abs and a really defined chest. She has broad shoulders that are really good for holding onto when you’re riding her toned thighs, god. Thigh riding with Abby is heavenly, all the work she puts into leg day at the gym really makes sure it never misses when you’re desperately grinding your clit into her leg.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
As said earlier, Abby’s sex drive is INSANE. Anything you do turns her on really, she’s usually ready to go whenever wherever. You’re hers, just the reminder makes her intent on having you wherever she can get you. She’ll respect boundaries, though, of course. She’s not unhinged  totally unhinged, if you’re not into it that’s that. But if she goes too long without some sort of relief, it’ll come really close to her begging. She would never, but she’s thought about it a couple of times. Pleading with you to let her please you. She’s very desperate, but she’d never tell you.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Abby’s not a sleeper, period. If you sleep, she’ll watch you, match your breathing, maybe doze off while holding you close, but if you’re up, she’ll gladly be up with you, talking or working or cleaning you up. If she really wants to sleep after, she’d have to get up and go through her whole night routine before settling. She’s a creature of habit, what can I say? 
I’m not just talking skin care either. She’ll go to the gym, drink like two bottles of water, shower, watch an episode of a show and then watch tiktoks in bed before deciding to close her eyes. Many a time you’d roll over in bed and reach out for her, and she wouldn’t be there. Don’t take it personally though.
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