#anything they do is futile and doomed to fail

[the-girl-with-too-many-ideas]

[thewertsearch]

TT: So what about Jade? […] TT: You didn't tell her your expedition with her would result in your death, let alone one she'd inadvertently cause. TT: Or that she'd be stuck with the job of resuscitating you. Did you? TG: what am i really supposed to say TG: hey were gonna hunt frogs til you shoot me through the jack TG: then i die and youve got to make out with me TG: that kind of changes how the whole thing goes doesnt it

Plus, after the first loop, you already knew you weren't going to tell her. The window of opportunity to decide the circumstances of your death had already closed.

TG: you dont know anything TG: about what i was feeling or what happened on lofaf TG: you were all pavement faced and babbling your throefester speak and flipping off the shit with your own crazy deathwish thing why do you think you know what was going through my head TG: youre just assuming and throwing around psyche buzzwords like aspd complex disorder

I don't think we've ever seen Dave this angry.

I think he's earned it, to be honest. These kids have been stuck in Skaia's emotional pressure cooker for nearly 24 hours, and they’re all reaching their respective breaking points. Dave's had just about enough, and he needs to let it out.

TG: im telling you if i said anything at all about it she probably doesnt even fire her gun once and all im doing is dragging her into a doomed timeline with me TT: I guess I'm learning to be impressed by your sense of obligation to inevitable misfortune. It's a strange case of inspiration through futility.

Well, it’s complicated.

On a surface level, it really does look like his misfortune was predestined - but the more of Homestuck I read, the more I gravitate toward the theory I linked in my previous post - that the Alpha Timeline can only 'force' you to do things that are already consistent with your personality. After all, we still haven't really seen a time loop that forces a character to act against their own nature.

If it's true, then perhaps Dave’s getting these shitty loops because he expects them – and maybe, if he changed his perspective, he’d start to be presented with kinder ones. It's worth a try, at least.

It’s not like this is exclusively a Sburbian phenomenon, either. Outside of Homestuck, plenty of us feel like our personalities trap us in loops of our own, forcing us to repeatedly experience the same thoughts, actions or situations.

We might not be time travelers, but our own metaphorical loops can feel just as inescapable as the literal ones binding Dave.

TG: i was never that cool with this TT: With what, exactly? TG: you know how you turned out to be this incredibly shitty seer of light and basically failed at that in every way imaginable TT: Hey!

Eh, I think you deserved that one.

[exclusively0ccupied]

(SPOILERS+FW WARNING!!) finally finished this woo!! i really like how it came out so please dont let this flop :[ comments are super appreciated!! lmk what your fav part is (ʘ ͜ʖ ʘ) some yapping about this under the cut!!

in the 'shes on the go' scene, with sou, its supposed to be him making an attempt to escape after the ch2 main game, when following the emotion route and keeping kanna alive. he hasnt got a collar in this scene, having previously taken it off. (thats def not me just being lazy and forgetting to draw it. def not.) i tried to make the lyrics sync with whats going on onscreen, like 'flowers for the sinking dead' gets kanna and 'with hospitals' is qtaro. for the yabusame siblings part, 'way too fast' was alice's since he, in his rage and grief over the ranger's taunting, acted way too fast and let his anger get the best of him. reko's was 'way too slow', since if she had acted a bit faster, maybe not let the fake get the knife or something similar, she may have been able to stay alive. 'shell turn to stone' refers to nao finding out she's the sacrifice, more or less bound to die or to kill everyone else. she hasnt got much of a choice, stuck where she is as if she were stone. 'somebody sighs who is not in disguise anymore' can work with several characters, but i chose kai and joe. they both in a way end up losing their disguise and have nothing better to do than sigh, knowing their fates were now set and anything they did would be impractical at best. kai lost his disguise of being a normal participant of the death game, having been revealed to have some connections with asunaro and also having been revealed to be the sage. joe lost his disguise of being the sage, having been revealed to be the sacrifice. the failure of their disguises is what inevitably led to their doom. for the end part, the joe and kai parallels, in the part with the hands the backgrounds have some significance. the joe one features sara's hand, holding the clicker given to her by miley. the background is dark, while a ring of light circles her hand. this was meant to symbolize how her action held hope, hope shed be able to save him, hope there was still something she could do, but ultimately she failed. she wasnt going to be allowed a chance in the first place, hence how the majority of the background is dark. the hope born by desperation, the light born by dark, ultimately failed and was proven to be purposeless. whereas kai's, the majority is light while the hand itself is surrounded by darkness, symbolizing how his action held despair and anguish, but was also a beacon of hope, his way of resistance and stopping the organization from taking away their freedom fully. he chose to die, on his own terms, and that action, although born from a sense of futile desperation, also gave him a chance to fight back in his own way, however measly that chance may be. ok i think im done thanks for attending my ted talk everyone, hope yall enjoyed!!

[honeyteakaros]

au where Hermes burns down Cyllene as punishment for Luke

If Apollo's "involvement" in the second war leads to a six-month-long punishment named Lester, it's weird how Hermes seems to get off scot free for Luke (and honestly, Ares too for the bolt). And yeah, I've seen theories where it states Hermes didn't break the ultimate non-interference laws and therefore was not punished, buT! I think it would make sense if anyone who had any involvement in any war WAS punished, just kept their mouths shut about the details.

so what would be hermes' punishment for luke's actions in the first war? i propose this:

Zues should make Hermes burn down his birthplace. destroy it. wipe it off the map. kill whatever was left of his mother's earthly connections, thereby locking her and her sisters into their celestial forms, never to step foot on the earth again. It's the death of an immortal, and how chilling is that? According to Apollo, there is a power in birthplaces, but for a bastard of Olympus, it is only a stain of a reminder of where they came from.

(putting the rest under the cut bc its long lol)

ig there would be 3 main things that Heremes would take away from this:

showing Hermes that Cyllene is the consequence of his own actions. May Castellan, Luke Castellan, now his mother, who else? Everything he has touched has turned to ash, and any life he has entered has been led to ruin. ig this mindset would also shine a different light on Hermes' deadbeatness, in a way.

1. Enforces the consequences of Zeus' non-interference rule.

Scaring Hermes into inaction by punishing the results of his rare action (giving Luke a quest, speaking to him that literal one(?) time, telling May about the oracle) would also handily explain why the hell he was so absent during the giant war and the entirety of toa. Like, communications are down and messaging systems are in complete disarray, isn't that Hermes' domain? Why the hell isn't he doing anything about it? Well, that's bc he knows what happens when he disobeys, and at this point, he's running out of family to lose.

2. Prophecy is set in stone

This punishment would also unknowingly (to Zeus) create a mindset of the inevitability of prophecy in Hermes. Aka, the literal opposite of what Apollo and his trial's entire deal. Aka Zues' entire deal! !!!This is negative character development for Hermes gang!!!

If we go with the idea that Hermes knew about Luke's fate since he was a baby, and his giving Luke that quest was Hermes trying to change his son's fate... Then it almost sounds like one of the only times Hermes broke his father's non-interference rules was in an attempt to change Luke's fate. But not only did it blow up in his face spectacularly, but if that quest was a fundamental canon event in Luke's spiral into vengeance, then this is a classic tale of a hero meeting his end on the path he took to avoid it.

Not only has Hermes failed to save his son in what he believed was a futile attempt to go against prophecy, but he has also doomed his homeland in his rash actions. By punishing Hermes through Cyllene, it enforces the idea that his ever daring to think he could change fate has inadvertently brought the mountain to its ruin.

Furthermore, Zeus' choice of Hermes' birthplace as the target is uniquely tailored to hit where it hurts the most. A forest fire can go burning on for years, after all, and a mountain of ancient trees surrounded by boundaries of the boundary god could theoretically go on burning forever. After the deed has been done and the entire mountain is up in flames, from that point onwards, Zeus would only have to point to a ruined Cyllene to quell whatever mere suggestion Hermes has of stepping out of line.

3. zues proving to hermes that he is ultimately his father's son

if nympths in the rrverse are physically bound to a certain place, then maia and her sisters would have both their stars in the pleiades constellations in addition to mount cyllene.

Say, would the offsping of a nympth and a god be a minor god themselves? another nympth? a monster? who knows? in reality, their entire existence hinges on mortal belief and how humans perceive them, but parentage still plays a role in how their stories are told. so therefore the only olympian with a nympth for a mother would also reasonablly assume that there is a peice of him, like his mother, is tied to that mountain. weather or not thats actually true doesnt matter, what matters is when cyllene burned and hermes stood at the foot of the mountain and did not burn with it, to him it was the dreaded proof that he was no longer his mothers son. that he has left behind everything good that he used to be, and through his very own efforts, somewhere between his childhood in that cave where he dared dreamed of something greater, he has forfeited what made those dreams worth chasing in the firat place. through his own efforts, he has become something terrible. he has become his fathers son.

.

.

.

all this is to say that rrverse zues may be evil, but bros not uncreative lmao. isolating Hermes through cutting off some of the last of his support system (by his own hands, no less) not only ensures Hermes' reliance on Zeus but also Hermes' reliance and identification with Olympus as a whole. also ensures that when the time comes for Apollo's punishment, there's already a hurt there that's ripe and ready to be dug into.

Apollo's been banished to mortal-hood? oh boo hoo, what a tragedy (compleatly different hc but i think hermes honestly would've had a much easier time adjusting to mortalhood compared to apollo at first, mainly due to the nature of hermes' domains). Oh, Apollo nearly keeps dying as a mortal and is prophesied to perish at the jaws of Python? well, fuck, his head for his crimes is what he deserves, is it not? While Apollo's punishment is a thinly veiled assassination attempt, Hermes' punishment would be to isolate him further.

There was already a jealousy here that could be amplified to the nines post-trials. I think it's due to the sheer fact that Apollo came out of his punishment better off than how he began, divine and golden and shining once more, even though he has defied their father again and again and has acted as an antithesis to everything he once preached. To Hermes, Apollo's death-defying ascension makes the fact that while Apollo effortlessly gets everything, the only thing Hermes has received for his troubles is a dead mother, dead son, and a homeland in ashes.

[rallentando1011]

empathetic (emphasis on pathetic)

Hamato Donatello did not frequently feel fondness. Nor attraction. Nor much of anything, for that matter.

Feelings were like syrup: superficially sweet yet so easy to boil over, develop a sludgy, sticky mess of. Texturally, they were a resounding no.

And so he avoided them, ignored them at all costs, swept them under the rug then proceeded to incinerate said proverbial rug.

It worked like a charm, time and time and time again without fail.

Until it didn’t.

Somehow, this weird, warm, fuzzy sensation managed to infiltrate his nigh impenetrable defenses and make a muddle of things and his mind, i.e. he was struck by the L-word, i.e. he met you.

So quickly had the almighty fortress of his emotional front crumbled upon your arrival, so quickly had his resolve instinctively melted, so quickly had he caved.

It was terrifying.

He’d never quite seen the appeal in confiding in others. Sure, he had his brothers, father, April, but they were different, steadfast, reliable, family.

Letting new people into your life and mind and feelings was too vulnerable, too complicated, too messy.

Emotions: fickle, fleeting, forlorn, unlike the reliable cogs and circuits and familiarity of his lab and normal life. An anomaly in themselves.

It certainly was not intentional, letting you into his life, his lab, his affection; it was more of you simply waltzing in and staking claim and refusing not to occupy his thoughts at each and every waking hour.

The realization of the existence of his ill-fated infatuation dawned upon him nary a few months following your introduction as he recognized the textbook signs of it.

Feeling comfortable, at ease with you, longing to message and text and talk to you, experiencing restlessness nightly at the thought of you - he was certifiably done for.

If his fancies were unrequited, it may have been easier; just confess to the hopeless romanticism, get utterly rejected, accept the futility of love and how it was doomed from the start, go back to being your companion.

But no, you just had to complicate things further.

Your reciprocated affections, your incessant presence at his side, an accidental I love you or two - it was unbearable.

So he ditched it. Ditched you. Poured himself into his work and holed himself up in the lab.

Was it the coward’s way out: leaning into the easiest option without consideration for the alternative of not being an emotional recluse? Certainly.

Would that hinder him from doing so in the slightest?

Negatory.

He would rather get the situation dealt with earlier on than encourage the muck of emotions between you two to grow, fester, rot.

No chance he’d ever given for a relationship resulted in anything but failure, pain, anger - giving it another shot could only end in a repeat.

So maybe it was for the best that he pushed you away; better to focus on something sturdy, tangible, real rather than whatever blend of oxytocin and endorphins and serotonin and dopamine was convincing your mind that you loved him.

Those hormones, and consequently those feelings, would fade with time.

You’d get over it.

And he would too.

[hawke-from-kirkwall]

Solas. The Dread Wolf. He is an incredibly fascinating character to me. He has many names. His history is tangled and twisting with love, loyalty, pain, wisdom, betrayal, pride, power, fear, failure, regret- each part telling the story of a truly complex and nuanced person. In this Essay I will...

Something I find absolutely fascinating about Solas over the course of DAI and now DATV is that I feel you can see him struggle with the fact that at every turn his desperate belief that those around him are on some level not real people (a belief he holds on to with white knuckle fists because he knows he cannot complete his goal if he allows himself to see them as real) is challenged. Varric, Cole, Sera, Bull, Lavellan, or even an Inquisitor that's not Elvhen, Felessan, even to some extent Mythal, they directly challenge his view of them. He has to silence them or he won't be strong enough to continue his mission- he'd fail again. So he kills his closest friend, can't even look him in the eye when he does it, he breaks up with Lavellan (or distances himself from a friendly Inquisitor), and abandons the Inquisition without a word, even cuts himself off from Cole because Cole knew who he was and could reveal too much.

Solas cuts himself off from anyone and everything that could tear down his idea that they could be REAL, that they could deserve the same chance he and the other ancient elves had to live, or he knows he will abandon his work. He'd once again fail. And Solas fears he couldn't survive that.

So he forces himself to be detached, cold, calculating, deceptive, and strategic. He once again bears the mantle of Dread Wolf, once again the cost is never too high if it means the People are restored.

Solas fascinates me in his obstinate determination to not accept what he sees, and I believe he knows deep down, is true - his original plan succeeded, but the cost was great and that there is truly no way to reverse it. The world of Thedas, as it is now, completely changed from anything he ever wanted, is the result. But change is a part of life. It cannot be stopped. Fighting change or seeking to reverse change only serves to change things further and never in the way you had planned. Ultimately, Solas's plan was doomed from the start- he could succeed in pulling down the veil, he could "minimize the damage", but the world that would result from it would still not be the world he wants. It would still be subject to the thousand years of change it had gone through and would change further still at the abrupt return of magic and spirits to the world. He cannot predict the outcome and consequences that would be the aftermath of his success. And he doesn't want to! He cannot reconcile his failure so he pushes forward to erase what cannot be erased. It's futile. And I don't believe he is fully blind to it. I am certain he knows, even if he refuses to sit with it long enough to admit it.

Solas is a broken man who's so focused on his one failure that the cost of "repair" doesn't matter. HE has to fix it. HE has to sacrifice. HE has to go it alone. Else he might be persuaded to change his mind, to do the selfish thing and move on, when the ancient elvhen no longer have that chance.

So he holds tight to his bitter resolve only to be challenged again at every turn by Rook and their team, old allies and friends, those he had betrayed. Again.

His story is one of pain, loss, regret, failure, twisted purpose and the incredible power of a small seed of hope.

If you choose this end, Solas finally removes his blinders to see the light of hope in front of him. With or without Lavellan taking the journey with him, Solas finally sees what he'd been so forcefully shoving out of his view - it just takes one choice. One right decision to start a journey towards redemption. He cannot be absolved of guilt for his actions. He cannot change the past. But perhaps with time he can redeem his future.

[Me, typing this up at 10am on a Tuesday... like a normal person. Lol]

[jaybejaybeyes]

Something’s been itching in my head for a while, and I finally figured out how to put it into words. One of my biggest issues with Viktor in s2 is that his arc’s ending feels… incomplete. Not necessarily because of what happens, but how it’s framed.

It doesn’t really feel like he comes to grips with the full horror of what he was doing—stripping people of their free will, changing their bodies, turning them into husks. Viktor’s reaction isn’t one of remorse; it seems like one of personal failure. His plan didn’t work. The old alt!Viktor never succeeded in erasing his own emotions. And that’s what the voiceover is about in the scene too—the ultimate, inevitable failure of the Glorious Evolution.

And that’s where it ends. There’s no empathy for the people he forcibly converted, no reckoning with the monstrosity of it all. Just fear and despair from the realisation that it was all futile from the start.

What I’m trying to say is that the show presents an intriguing suggestion: Viktor may have never understood the fundamental problem of his Glorious Evolution, why it was doomed to leave him in “dreamless solitude”. What he did understand, though, was that his attempt to make the world a better place was meant to fail.

Ah. Isn’t that a tragic conclusion for a misguided idealist who took things too far?

Who almost won and failed to realise why he didn’t?

Sure, you can argue that the Arcane/Hexcore was controlling him, stripping away his personality, but isn’t it more compelling to think that Glorious Evolution was something he actually believed in? That it came from him—his fears, his insecurities, his s1 refusal to accept his mortality? That his vision of remaking humanity was tied to his own desperation for a legacy, a way to ensure he was never forgotten?

And look. I don’t mind it if Viktor never realised how horrific his actions were in the end. The show suggests he was completely consumed by his ambition, genuinely willing to sacrifice anything and anyone for his end goal. That tracks. But my issue is that the show doesn’t make it 100% clear. And it’s not because I can’t read between the lines, but rather because there’s no time for us (and Viktor himself) to process that thought in the final scene. Instead, the show cranks the mesmerising visuals, the music, the voiceover; it practically flirts with ambiguity.

Yet in the end, Viktor’s reaction doesn’t feel like the long-awaited narrative clarity. Did Viktor overcome his flaw? Or did he succumb to it? Did he fail? Or did he just get bitter upon realising he could never win? There are enough hints about the answers but the show never fully commits, leaving things elusive.

Looking at his character arc, it seems like his rejection of death in s1 shifts into a willingness to sacrifice himself to destroy the Rune and free the people in s2. But even that feels underwhelming—especially compared to Jayce’s sacrifice, which carries more weight because Jayce had a choice. He could’ve left, but he chose to stay. Viktor, on the other hand, seemed doomed to die/remain in the Hexplane either way. And because we never get a true sense of his motivations in s2 (I mean, not just the stated ones, but the deep, hidden whys and becauses), it’s hard to fully appreciate or even critique the ending of his arc.

And you know what’s really tragic? That is the ending of Viktor’s arc. His journey is over. He, as a character, did everything the narrative needed him to do.

So what was Viktor’s resolution, after all? Did he find clarity, or only fear? Did he understand something about himself in the end? Did he face what he was running from? Did he reflect on what he’d done? Did he ever truly consider that he was in the wrong in s2? Or did he just despair over inevitable failure and choose death over facing a world where (and which) he failed?

Call me soft, but that’s not the kind of narrative ambiguity I enjoy in character journeys. I’d much rather have a clearer framing of Viktor’s ending, something that would let us understand his Arcane* Herald arc more fully and connect with Viktor one last time.

[reikiajakoiranruohoja]

Murder Drones essay: So nice, it is a curse

Warning: This essay deals heavily with emotional abuse, manipulation and gaslighting. Please take care.

There used to be a cliche among the readers of badly written fanfiction. When a character was 'so beautiful it is a curse' it was mocked as the writer refusing to give their OC any flaws. It was born out of the (misguided) idea that any attention the OC got was positive.

Years later, when most of us had grown up and experienced the real world, mocking that statement suddenly didn't feel right. After all, all the attention you get is not positive.

I began this essay with this story, because the same mentality goes with N and how he got treated by the people he was nice to.

When we see N the worker drone, he has nothing negative to say about his coworkers no matter how harsh they are towards him. He isn't blind, he knows Tessa's folks are bad news. But to Tessa and his fellow drones, he is as nice as can be.

While the situation between him and J was already toxic, it was still mostly J being an arsehole with no murderous intentions.

The same cannot be said with Cyn/the Absolute Solver. For the sake of my sanity, I will use Cyn as a stand-in for both the Solver and Cyn herself. Now, it is clear that Cyn actually liked N. She seems to gravitate towards him and we can see in episode 5 that she even sees him as safety.

However, Cyn intentions are far from pure. While she likes N a lot, she is also quite clearly using his kind nature to make him do things he wouldn't otherwise do. Like take him to a situation he knew he was not allowed to be in and then let him take the heat for her actions.

Cyn's care is also extremely twisted. She likes N, but she likes him like one might like their favourite tool. If he breaks, she'll just get a new one. Cyn also likes N to be a certain way, so she resets his memory to keep him from changing.

Because N is often absolutely clueless about the wider situation, his behaviour indirectly hurts V and J. Neither who get to forget and so treat him badly in their own ways. V ignores him to avoid him getting hurt and J just outright abuses N.

All three women share one thing in common when it comes to their treatment of N; They ignore his agency and who he actually is entirely.

While J and V deal with a lot of trauma, they have the choice to choose how they react and how they do their job.

N doesn't.

N is stripped of pretty much any choice or way to affect situations entirely. He is robbed of his memories to keep him static. Anything he tries with J and V is doomed to fail, because neither is interested in actually getting to know him as he is. V refuses to interact with him unless she absolutely has to and J ignores him unless he messes up.

V, like Cyn, has an idea of N she wants to remember. While J just sees an easy punching bag.

Since N cannot remember the past and is nearly completely socially isolated, all he can do is keep trying to be nice to both J and V and hope they one day might change their minds. It is futile, but he doesn't really have any other option.

It is very telling that it isn't Uzi's kindness that draws him to her as much as the way she asks him to make his own choices. Uzi challenges N to question and not go with what he is told, which ends up with him getting hurt by J. Luckily Uzi is there to get him back up and basically forces him to fix his mistakes.

Given Uzi's personal arc is to stop trying to play a role and accept herself, the little push she gave N to make his own choices starts to bear fruit from the end of episode 2 onwards.

Now that N is no longer so desperate for attention that he'd follow Uzi like a lost puppy, he starts to ask questions and act different from the image V (and Cyn) had of him. What is important to note, is that N doesn't stop being nice or kind. Rather, he tempers it with other aspects of his personality.

N's kindness is actually important, because he serves as a brake and advisor to Uzi's chaos. He tempers her drive and helps her direct it better.

N no longer just hopes others would like him, he is willing to demand answers if they aren't given to him.

As we see in episode 4, this change shocks V. As stated above, V had an image of N that she wanted to cherish but that image had over the years lost all the rough edges N had.

When N meets Tessa, he has his memories back. But regaining memories does not mean one is the same person anymore. The way N acts around 'Tessa' shows how uncertain of how he should feel about her.

The more 'Tessa' decides for him and stonewalls his choices, the less N trusts her and the more he starts to doubt her. By the time N beheads 'Tessa', he has had enough of everyone's lies to him. It doesn't matter that Tessa once saved him and loved him; the N that cared about that is long gone.

Cyn can only blame herself for that reaction. She was the one who wanted N to stay static and so N developed from that static baseline into someone new. Not the big brother she remembered, but someone moulded by years of being a disassembly drone and having to hunt his food lest he starve or overheat.

N's story is about many things: trauma, dehumanisation and grief. But it is also about the loss of agency and how to regain it.

[swanlakex]

Ok y’all I’m back! Thank you for your support. I’ve decided to name this fic 💀.

Enjoy!

Silent Light

Chapter Five

“It is your wedding night, Y/N.”

“Mother, I am not sleeping with him. He will barely look at me.”

“Whether or not you secure an heir, the court is watching. Knowing. I can feel their displeasing eyes right from where we very stand. You must at least spend the night in the same room as him. He knows this too- just for tonight.”

You squinted at your mother, trying to see if there was a shred of empathy or understanding inside of her. Empty eyes. The party had finally begun to die down, and you couldn’t hide behind fun and family for much longer. You saw Esme and other staff collect dishes and fold tablecloths. You really were grateful you had the ceremony at his estate, grand and glistening with gold, with its truth tucked behind the shining linoleum floor.

As you helped your mother into your family’s carriage, you felt a hand on your shoulder. Louis. He looked at you with a terrible sweetness that said childhood really is over. “Y/N. I wish you to not worry. I will take care of them,” he gestured to your mother and sister in the coach. “Like I had promised Father.” You grinned, feeling an immense pride in your brother. So young, so distinguished. You brought a gentle hand to his cheek.

“My boy,” you whispered with tenderness. “He would be so proud of you. Down here, we all are.” Louis grinned as you brought him into a suffocating embrace. “Write if you need anything, if you have questions, news.. anything at all. Just write, yes? Don’t leave me bored in this castle, my brother.” You laugh as you kiss his head and shoo him to the carriage. He nods in agreement to your wishes, then your family disappears in a trot down the dark, long, winding road.

You lay in a chaise window, drinking up your new room. It was a sight. Large velvety curtains kissing the floor, few bookshelves, grand fireplace. Certainly a dream. You toy with the fabric of your nightgown, anxiously waiting for disaster.

Suddenly, footsteps. A knock. You call them in.

“Your Highness, Sir Skywalker.” A voice of a small man calls out. Then, Anakin walks into the room. He hadn’t meant to stomp, the weight of his boots and the day he had carried through his body. Nevertheless, it made you shift in your seat. The door closed behind him, and he went straight to the washroom. You don’t even recall him glancing toward your way. You heard water running. He must be bathing. At a desperate escape, you grab a book and begin to scan pages. You get a couple chapters in before your eyes are stolen from your head.

“What are you reading?” His voice is sluggish, raspy. You look up, and you can feel your pupils dilate. Wet hair dripping onto the hardwood. Towel hung low around his waist. You watch him breathe slowly, the water running off of his shoulders.

“..The Tempest.”

He nods. “Shakespeare, no?”

You nod quickly.

“One of his last works,” he calls from his shoulder, stepping behind a wall. “It surrounds the act of letting go.”

“So far- It’s confusing.” You say.

“It’s cerebral.” He then steps out into the open room again, in his night shirt and linen pants. You’ve never seen him in such a visible kind-of-way, pure, vulnerable.

You shake your head, understanding that trying to read him is futile. “Mr. Skywal-“

“Anakin. Please.”

“Anakin.” You repeat slowly. “What do you expect to happen this night?”

“I know that this arrangement is not what either of us desired. But it is counterproductive to not be civil. I will-“

“Counterproductive?” Your eyebrows furrow, tears prick your eyes. “I understand you did what you had to do to make your father happy. I know you plan to keep me around for a couple of months then pitch me so you can go back to your works. But- as a woman, Anakin. A doomed, godforsaken woman. My job is to marry. My worth is determined on how many children I bear. Do you not see? If I fail to secure an heir, I will be deemed unsuccessful. Useless. If you divorce me, my livelihood is over. I cannot remarry. I will have no way to support my family or carry lineage. I will be a burden in life. This is all that I have.”

Anakin stood back, eyes blinking. “I have a job too. A purpose. Men shed their blood every day at my word. I am responsible for hundreds of lives- I am responsible for men going home to their families tonight.”

You shake your head. “You do not understand! If you were to retire your duties, you would have a home. A family, people to rule-“

“Family?” He scoffs aggressively. “What do you know about my family?”

“Nothing! I haven’t a clue in the slightest who you are!” You cry out. You struggle down a choked sob, but you’ve always had a habit of letting your emotions get the best of you. “And I am stuck. In this fucking castle.” You pant. “With you.”

For a moment, there is unbearable silence. You both stand there; looking at each other like a puzzle with lost pieces.

“Here, you have all a woman could ask.” He steps closer, eyes harsh and scary. “A beautiful home, grand meals, servants waiting on your hand and foot. I could never understand my father for choosing you. Ungrateful maid.” He spits. You stagger in your guard. With that, he spun around on his heel and fled the room.

You stand there, shaking with anger and grief. You can’t say you were surprised at his actions, but you had never been spoken to so harshly before.

That man, you thought, has a way with hurting.

———————————————————————————————————————————

The stars were twinkling with dull comforts, your knees were pulled up to your chest as you lay on your side. Of course, trying to sleep was useless. You just laid there, pitiful, watching the flicker of the bedside candle dance. You were deep in thought when you heard bickering coming towards your room.

“I don’t care..” You heard a mumble. “She is new.” …

“Wedding night… what will they think?” ….”Man up.”

Then, your door swung open and you shot upright. There stood Anakin, arms crossed and face like stone. Behind him was the King, his father. There was a strange pause in the air before his father hit Anakin on the back and he began to speak.

“Forgive me for my earlier remarks, Highness. It is not becoming of me.”

You looked to his father, a small contempt painted his face.

“Truth is, you are welcome and celebrated here.”

You nod slowly. “T-thank you?”

There was an exchange of hushed whispers. Anakin’s father nudged him into the room. He then left, closing the door behind him. Click! He had locked it. The glance you both exchanged told you Anakin knew too. “Bastard.” He muttered under his breath. He looked up to you. “He’s forcing me to stay here.”

“I see.” If it wasn’t so late, you probably would be more upset than you were. The dark hour and dazed confusion only made it seem.. kind of funny? You suppressed a smile.

“I can move to the chaise-“

“Nonsense.” He interrupted you. He walked over to a cupboard and pulled out a pillow and a quilt.

“Really, it is not a problem. I couldn’t sleep.”

“No? Me either.” Anakin sighed as he struggled to fit his tall body onto the loveseat. He was curled up inside of himself, hands tucked under his chin and ankles crossed.

You let out a chuckle. “Sorry.” You covered your mouth in an effort to stop. It was useless. At your giggling, he let out the slightest grin.

“Maybe the floor would be preferable.” He admitted, slithering out of his position.

You hated yourself for laughing, you were supposed to be enraged at Anakin. But perhaps because it was midnight, or the bubbly drinks, or the long day you’d had, you saw him once, as just a human.

He rested on the floor, tucking an arm underneath his pillow. “Goodnight.”

You laid down in the giant bed all to yourself. “Yes. Goodnight.”

Looking out the window, the moon spilled her light onto the floor. Illuminating Anakin’s face, he was shadowed in pale blue. Your sight traced the outline of his face. You found yourself counting each eyelash.

You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to forget that remarkable face of his, and drifted off into a dazed sleep.

[foxhole-tarot]

Pick a Card Weekly Reading - Jan 6 25

Relax your eyes and notice which of the 3 lower piles they're drawn to. pick the pile that calls to you

The Alleyman's Tarot

Take what resonates, leave what doesn't

Universal Cards (Top)

Justice sideways, The Lovers

This reading 2 cards jumped for me while doing my initial shuffle. they are general cards describing in a grander sense what applies to all.

Justice, sideways: The balance is tipped. There are wrongs that are in need of righting. This card can go either way, you have the power to tip the scales in your life. Look inside yourself, what immediately jumped to you reading this? Perhaps it's interpersonal, financial, or more broadly political. This card calls for you to do work.

The Lovers: You are missing something in your life. You are longing for its presence, perhaps even its return. All this, yet you have love in your life already. You underappreciate this love, you fail to truly foster it. Love is like an succulent, it requires the most delicate handling and care. Remember to water it.

Take these cards with you through your next reading, connect the dots. These cards are meant to be read together but I will leave you, the querent, to find their meaning in your life.

Pile 1 (Left)

The Moon reversed, Lightning in a Bottle reversed, Ten of Attention reversed

You're in a social hole in the ground. You are surrounded by people who are entirely indifferent to you while you crave their attention and praise. You live off of their love for you but your source has run dry. The people you depend on are slowly growing distant from you. you feel desperate and are grasping at anything to keep them.

It's time to leave.

You don't realize how bad it's gotten until you hit a breaking point. You are at your breaking point. You will find joy elsewhere. You will find people who love you and you will find ways to value yourself as a person beyond the praise you receive. You will rebuild your self esteem but first you have to get out.

Pile 2 (Middle)

Strength, The Hawkmoth reversed, Weird Ass Mystical Shit

You are afraid of the unknown. It calls out to you, it threatens you. You are in a predicament and you don't know what the answer will look like. It's beyond you. Some things are not meant to be known. There is kindness in ignorance, fighting against the future is futile. Some things are hidden for a reason. You will find peace when you accept that you are out of control of fate. You cannot alter what happens in the future and you cannot guarantee that you'll know what happens at all. You are seeking answers that no one can give you.

You are strong on your own.

You do not need to know what the future holds because you are a fighter. You are resilient in the face of challenge and when an inevitable struggle appears you will have the energy and passion to survive it. All people will encounter trouble in their lives. It's up to you to survive it.

Pile 3 (Right)

The Magician, Four of Wands, Ouroboros

There are two sides of you right now, the side attempting to balance the many aspects of your life and the side that wants to curl up under the covers with some hot tea and a nice book. You are seeking refuge from your obligations and in the process you are eating yourself alive. You are creating your own doom.

It's time to start juggling.

It's wonderful to seek refuge in comfort but it must not come at the expense of the rest of your life. When you find yourself sleeping through too many days the neglected obligations will come knocking. it's just a matter of time. break the cycle, pick up that envelope you've been meaning to read, make that phone call, write that email. it's time to bring productivity back into your life.

[jjkamochoso]

The Perfect Fit

Overview: Levi Ackerman begrudgingly finds himself falling in love with the Survey Corps’ seamstress. Will they be able to own up to their feelings for each other? Or is their love doomed to fail before they discover the truths of each other’s hearts? This slow burn reader insert story will be filled with angst, yearning, and a bit of mystery as we slowly unravel the truths behind Y/N’s past… and explore her and Levi’s future!

Chapter 11

Series Masterlist

Chapter 10 linked here

Chapter 12 linked here

Levi Ackerman x female reader

Warnings: cussing

You looked at Levi expectantly. "What do you say, Captain? Ready to run away with me?"

Levi couldn't deny that he was craving a change of scenery as well. With his injuries, he couldn't participate in training and the four bland walls of his office combined with never ending paperwork was enough to make even the most sane man mad. He also really liked the way those words sounded coming from your mouth. He knew he had a duty to humanity and could never drop his responsibilities to run away from it all and live a more peaceful life, but boy, he'd enjoy playing pretend with you for a little while, focusing on humanitarian duties rather than fighting for once.

"I'm ready to leave right now if you are."

You broke out in a smile, relieved that he still wanted to help you give away blankets and clothes to people in the unfortunate areas of the interior.

"Good. I am too, but the paperwork that allows us to take leave and horses isn't. I have to talk to Erwin and see when we can go. I'm thinking as long as you're cleared by the doctor, we can head out in 3 days' time. Is that alright?"

Levi nodded yes and you told him to get some rest before leaving to find your oldest friend, the commander. When you knocked on the door, he granted you entry and you closed the door behind you.

"How's my dearest friend been holding up lately?" Erwin asked you as you two shared a hug before taking a seat.

"Oh, I've been alright, nothing too crazy," you answered. "How about yourself? You've got a lot more going on than I ever have or hope to."

He took a sip of the drink on his desk and you wouldn't be surprised if it was some sort of alcohol.

"It's as much to be expected for the man in charge." His blue eyes danced around the room, not meeting your own. "It's nothing I can't handle. It's... a lot sometimes, though. I become afraid that no matter how much I try to do, it's all futile. I have so many goals that I can't-" He cut himself off as he swallowed another drink and you took notice of the deep eye bags he was sporting. You knew he had a lot riding on him, but he usually handled (or hid) it so well. You reached out to grip his hand as a sign of affection.

"I know you're in charge, but you're not the only one who should be held accountable for any failings, so stop blaming yourself. What you guys do is a thankless job but you're not without so many accomplishments. It seems like it's always one step forward, three steps back working here, but if there's anything I learned from you, it's that you have to keep walking. So, Erwin.” He looked up at you. "You have to keep moving forward. You're the heart of the Scouts. You're the only one whose faith has never wavered. We all believe in you."

Erwin let out a deep sigh and squeezed your hand back. "Thank you. I needed that. This is why I keep you around."

You chuckled, happy that you were able to lift his spirits a little bit.

"I know you didn't come here to see me wallow in pity, so what is it I can do to help?" he inquired.

"I'm planning on leaving for Wall Sina to do my charity work in a few days and I was wondering if I could borrow a cart and horse. I'd be gone about 10 days, 4 days traveling each way, 1 day passing everything out, and an extra in case something goes wrong. I was also coming to put in my request for leave, as well as Captain Levi's since he'll be accompanying me."

Erwin's eyebrows raised at the sound of his close friend's name. "Levi, huh? I've noticed that you two have gotten pretty close but he wouldn't leave work with just anybody, you know. He must think you're pretty special."

You felt embarrassment worm its way up your body as Erwin tried to contain his teasing smile. The commander's two closest friends couldn't fool him--Levi hadn't been this outwardly affectionate since he had shown up with Isabelle and Furlan all those years ago and you hadn't been this smiley with anyone, ever-- but he found the whole thing endearing.

"I'm not trying to embarrass you, y/n. I think it's nice that he's found something with you, whatever it is. I haven't seen either of you this happy in many years, or ever. This trip of yours will be good for the both of you to get out and do something for the betterment of humanity. It would bring some much needed positivity to you and the captain, I'm sure. I'll process the papers and send you on your way in no time."

You thanked him as you heard a knock at the door. Another soldier had told Erwin it was time for a meeting so you thanked him for his help and waved goodbye. You were held up at the door by the sound of his voice once more.

"Hey, y/n. Where exactly in Wall Sina are you going?"

You tilted your head in confusion. "There's the shelters in the capital that house citizens from the Underground until they can safely leave for Wall Rose. They're the same ones you and I usually go to. Why?"

He halted for a second, choosing his words carefully. "Well, with Levi there, I don't want... Just try to avoid the Underground. I don't want you two getting hurt."

You didn't understand what he was trying to get at, but you figured it wasn't the time for you to probe him. If the chance arrived, you would have to ask Levi exactly what Erwin meant. You thanked him for his warning and left, wracking your brain on what that enigma of a man was going on about.

Several days after your meeting with Erwin, he had told you everything got approved and Levi told you of his clearance from the doctor. You were to leave in a few hours so you began packing, your stomach fluttering with anxiety. You always got nervous before a trip but this one was stressful because of its unknowns. You had never traveled between walls without Erwin and his words hadn't left your mind. Why did he mention you getting hurt? You'd been there plenty of times prior with the blonde man, none of which had gone wrong, so why was he being cryptic about Levi? You tried to shake it from your head. Erwin had been under tons of stress lately so you chalked it up to him still reeling from the losses of the expedition. You had just thrown the last of your shirts in a bag when you heard a knock at your door. Levi was there, a duffel on his arm and a surprisingly pleasant look on his face.

"I'm ready if you are."

You were. You had already brought outside the bags of donation items so all that was left was your personal bag. You went to pick it up from the bed but Levi beat you to it.

"Aren't you still nursing broken ribs?" you asked, watching him in amusement as he shuffled down the hallway with both of your belongings.

"The doctor cleared me for all activity. I would be training shitty cadets to be less shitty right now if it weren't for you."

"Should I be saying you're welcome that you're not?"

Levi pondered for a second. "Four eyes is always saying I need a vacation."

"Their wish is now granted. So you're welcome," you replied, giggling a bit. When you stepped outside, you were expecting to be greeted by an open air cart, but instead, you were face to face with a fancy contained carriage. You thought maybe it was for someone else, but when Levi started loading your things inside, you knew it was for you.

"Did you know about this?" you asked him, flabbergasted. He put away the last of the bags as he answered you.

"The weather's supposed to be bad in a few days. I didn't want you catching a cold on our trip so I made Erwin reserve this instead."

Levi never failed to surprise you. He was so kind the way he thought about you and made your life so much easier. You nearly kissed him on the spot but didn't want him to keel over and die before you could get anywhere. The raven haired man wouldn't look you in the eye as you climbed inside the carriage, presumably shy about his caring so much about your wellbeing. The carriage driver took off and you two left the castle walls. You kept your eyes pointed out the window, not wanting to miss the opportunity to watch the foliage pass you by. It was your favorite part about riding in a cart or on a horse while holding onto someone else. Seeing the trees fly by you in this area almost reminded you of Levi taking you home that one day all those months ago. This carriage should have brought up that same feeling of freedom, but this time you were heading toward a place that had held you in its wretched confines for far too long. As you rode further and further away from your home and closer to your family in Mitras, you felt like you were starting to drown in a deep ocean of melancholy and stress. As you were lost in your own world, you didn't notice Levi staring at you from his bench across from yours. He was thankful that you were day dreaming because it meant he could observe you without hesitation. You normally looked very beautiful to him, but today, in your civilian clothes and more relaxed hairstyle than usual, you looked absolutely stunning. Even though this trip certainly wasn't just for pleasure, he was looking forward to a short break from the woes of every day life. He was hoping you were, too, but he saw your eyebrows furrow and you had a sad glint in your eye.

"Wanna talk about it?"

Levi's voice brought you out of your daze.

"Hmm? Oh. No, I just-- I get nervous on trips, that's all," you said. If Levi could tell you weren't giving him the whole truth, he didn't say anything.

You sighed, opting to speak your mind a bit more. "When I leave my home and head into the city, I get hit with this indescribable sadness. I think it's because I see people who have literally nothing and I can't help but think I'm not doing enough for them when I have so much."

"Don't be stupid. The fact that you're going out of your way to show kindness when others don't is a testament to your character. What you're doing will be appreciated by those who need it most. Trust me."

He spoke with such conviction that you wondered if he was ever one of those people who needed help. You didn't give it much thought since it was rude to make assumptions about someone's past.

"You always know exactly what to say to make me feel better, Levi. Thank you."

He scoffed. "I think you're the only person that's ever said that."

"That makes it all the more special then, doesn't it?" you asked, making him roll his eyes but you knew he agreed.

The carriage continued on its fast pace while you two sat in silence, both reading books. You kept peeking your eyes over the pages, taking the time to appreciate how Levi looked today. He never looked anything less than handsome to you, but him out of a uniform made your heart beat faster. He was wearing a long sleeve shirt with black pants and both items highlighted his frame perfectly. You loved the way he looked with the cravat but you were mesmerized with the graceful way his neck craned without something covering it up. He shifted in his seat and you quickly averted your eyes, hoping he hadn't seen you checking him out.

"Is your book that boring you'd rather look at me?" he asked, his gaze staying on his own unturned pages.

"Boring, no. Rather look at you, definitely," you said, taking the fact that you got caught in stride.

"Tch. Have some shame, brat," he chided, a faint blush showing up on his cheeks. You found it fun to tease Levi here and there. You wanted to keep showing him that you found him desirable so he wasn't left wondering if you still liked him romantically or not. Not that physical looks mattered to you two anyway, but you figured it didn't hurt to flirt with him every once in awhile to keep him on his toes. Afternoon turned to night and it got too dark to read, opting to leave the gas lamp off for now to conserve it in case of emergencies. The carriage slowed to a halt and the driver let you know that you were stopping for the night at a local inn. You and Levi exited the carriage, Levi taking your bag once again, and made a plan with the driver to meet up in the morning to set off. A room wasn't ready yet when you checked in so you and Levi went to the restaurant to partake in a nice warm meal. Conversation flowed easily between you two as you tore into the bread and meat you were served. When you finally got a key to your room, you opened the door and immediately frowned. You were supposed to get a room with two beds, but there was only one. You looked at Levi who didn't even seem to notice as he was already inside and discarded the bags in the corner of the room. You followed him in, confusion taking over you.

"There's only one bed," you said, stating the obvious.

"It's fine. I'll sleep on the floor," he replied, grabbing the extra blanket from the bed and laying it out. You stomped over to him, grabbing the soft textile.

"No way, especially not when you're still healing. I can go downstairs and talk to the owner, there has to be another room."

There wasn't. You and Levi had booked the last available room and the one with two beds that you had requested when you had gotten there was previously reserved. When you got back to your room, Levi had already laid down on the floor in an attempt to rest for a little while. You stood over him, your arms crossed.

"Get up, idiot. You're not sleeping on the floor."

"I don't sleep much anyway, idiot. Go to bed."

"If you don't get up, I'm sleeping on the ground, too."

That got Levi's attention, prompting him to sit up. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard and I'm around teenagers all day."

"Look," you said, defeated, "the bed is more than big enough for the two of us. You'll have your personal space and I promise I won't invade it on purpose."

Levi took his sweet time thinking about what he was going to do while you were loving life on the plush mattress, your pajamas on, and cozy under the covers. You heard the mattress creak as his body took up the spot next to yours.

"Finally decided to join me, loverboy?" You were joking with him to cover up the fact that you were nervous about sharing an entire sleeping space with the love of your life. Normally, sharing a bed with someone wouldn't be a huge deal, especially when that someone was a person who you trusted with your life, but Levi was a special case. You never wanted to push him into doing anything too fast or make him uncomfortable and you knew that relationship things like this could easily freak him out.

"I will not hesitate to snuff out your life with this pillow."

Well, at least he was acting like his normal self. He was, up until you heard shuffling under the sheets and felt the mattress dip down closer to you. It was nearly pitch black in the room so you couldn't see anything, but you felt your breath hitch in your throat as Levi scooted close enough to your face where you caught a glimpse of the faintest reflection of moonlight in his eyes. His breath was barely fanning over your arm that was lying next to your cheek on your pillow. All of a sudden you felt his hand on yours as he interlaced your fingers. It was a good thing that the room had no light because you were both flustered messes.

"Is this okay?" he whispered.

"Very," you whispered back, brushing your lips over the back of his hand like a kiss from a fleeting ghost. Even though Levi barely slept that night because of his ever present insomnia rearing its ugly head, lying next to you, with your bodies eventually intertwining, he found himself more rested than he ever knew could be possible.

Chapter 12

Taglist: @blueeclipsepaperstudent @raginginferno267 @come-away-with-me87

[tanadrin]

This is the Palestinian resistance. It’s not beautiful. It’s not inspiring. It’s desperate and futile and sad. Generation after generation of children, throwing themselves into the path of one of the most brutal military machines in human history, smashing their skulls against its steel hull, mangling their limbs in its treads, thousands of them, for seventy-five years, destroying themselves as they try to face down an engine that simply rolls on over the dying and the dead. These kids were brave, much braver than I’ll ever be. They rose to defend their honour. It’s noble. But stupid beyond belief. Later, Hedges talks to Lieutenant Ayman Ghanm, a Palestinian police officer who says he’s given up on trying to save these boys’ lives. ‘When we tell the boys not to go to the dunes,’ he says, ‘they taunt us as collaborators.’ I began by saying that this is a war without opposing sides. Israel is not actually trying to defeat the resistance; it has no political objectives, just violence. But the same goes for the resistance: they are not, in fact, doing anything to meaningfully resist. Think about what actually happens in Hedges’ story. The Israeli soldiers call through their loudspeakers for the Palestinians to come, come and be killed—and the Palestinians obediently show up. Their resistance is indistinguishable from following orders. The Israeli state wants a certain level of violence from the Palestinians, it actively courts it, and the resistance factions keep doing exactly as they’re told. They teach Palestinian children that the best thing they could do with their lives is lose them. This is not a very healthy attitude, but when you start up your bullshit about the glorious resistance you are part of that sickness. What would actual resistance look like? Maybe it would start with not handing over your life to the enemy. Not climbing up the dunes. In saying all this, I’m obviously breaking one of the biggest taboos on the left, which is that you must not presume to tell Palestinians how to go about their resistance. I might have spent time in Palestine, but I’m not Palestinian. I’m not subjected to the daily nightmare of occupation. Who am I to start preaching? My only reply is this: if the armed resistance factions were resisting sanely and effectively, this kind of taboo wouldn’t need to exist. If there were a better argument for their actions than don’t criticise the victims, you’d be making that one instead. But there isn’t, so you can’t. It’s not a coincidence that the exact same rhetoric is deployed by Israel and its apologists: yes, we’re committing hideous atrocities, but how dare you notice? Who are you to say anything to us? Whoever’s saying it, the fact remains that there is no military path to a free Palestine. This fact is inconvenient and unfair and doesn’t leave much room for the optimism of the will, but that doesn’t make it any less true, and if you think there’s an exemption from unfair truths that’s awarded to especially just causes then you are wrong. Israel has nuclear weapons: it will not be overthrown with small arms and explosives. I don’t think I have the right to condemn violent resistance altogether—but I can reject violent resistance that’s doomed to fail, that achieves nothing and produces nothing except violence for its own sake. Hamas and Palestinian Islamic Jihad claim to be fighting for an Islamic republic, in which Jews will be free to live peacefully as long as they don’t dispute the sovereignty of Islam. The PFLP claims to be fighting a revolutionary people’s war for a liberated workers’ state. Their critics say that both are actually fighting for an unlimited genocide, the death of every single Jew in Israel. But what difference does it make? This is all make-believe! None of it matters, because none of it is ever actually going to happen! They’re not fighting for anything at all. They’re just fighting.

This is a good essay in general, but this point draws out something I think is important: the need to believe that, if there is a group of Bad Guys in a conflict, doing Bad Things, there must be an opposing group of Good Guys doing Good Things. But there's no law of the universe that says it must be so; mostly there's just the churn of senseless, sickening violence, to no useful or redemptive end.

[theboys-inzoi]

🗓️ Chapter 2: The day before you came - Episode 2: Drive Previous (Fox on the run) - Next (For whom the Bell tolls)

Jack left again and wandered aimlessly through the streets of Dowon. He doesn't know what to do and he can't get himself go to work. He lost his friend. Failed his first and only real friend. Francine's grandson doesn't count. He can't fail him because he's only in his imagination (and Francine's). And he really shouldn't get entangled deeper into her madness. He saw where this lead. Utter disaster. The sweet and cute fox must have been caught by his owners by now and he would never see him again. At least not alive... Probably only his soft fur - draped around the neck of this woman. Or they'd mount his pretty head on the wall of their hunting lodge. And it was all his fault! Why couldn't he've kept his mouth shut! Just when he thought he probably should call his bosses that he wouldn't attend to work this day, Jack felt a tingling in the back of his neck. And a faint smell of ozone wavered in the air when a black SUV pulled up beside him. A Regulator, dammit! That was fast...

Regulator: "Get in." Jack didn't even know they had one of them around here in Dowon? Their community was too small to deploy a steady Regulator and they usually looked after themselves. Nothing ever happened here anyway.

Except for him hiding the runaway fox of a wealthy couple and feeding his landlord the Doenjang Jjigae of Doom. Jack's thoughts mainly circulated around the poor fox. Jack had tried aiding and abetting him to escape his murder and gave him false hope. An icy claw grabbed Jacks heart and squeezed - and he couldn't breath for a few seconds.

They didn't speak on their way to wherever the Regulator's office was. He knew anything anyway, otherwise he wouldn't be here - and Jack had nothing to say to his defense either.

The SUV stopped in front of the Dowon Heights Tower. The Regulator must have rented a temporary office here. Fancy... But why bringing out the big guns for a meaningless rascal like him? To intimidate him to confess everything? No need to.

Regulator: "Follow me." Tch. As if he had a choice... They'd eventually ban him from this world. Someone like him was a risk for every community and even though he'd tried so hard to put himself together and not cause any ruckus - it was futile. Trouble found him - wherever he went. The Doenjang Jjigae was probably just a trap to get finally rid of him. He deserved it after also dragging poor Leander down into his abyss. And for betraying his friend, the fox. He'd trusted him and Jack exposed his whereabouts to his hunters! Well, Leander did, but he shouldn't have told him in the first place.

The Regulator lead Jack to a sparsely decorated room and returned with what appeared to be Jack's folder...

The Regulator's cold eyes skimmed over the index: "We already have several entries here and I wonder why you haven't been banned earlier? Here, in only one day you set up two lethal traps (Leander and Mr Kareem almost breaking their necks over the brooms he forgot), stole a purse (of Mrs Kareem), kept the Potion Maker from doing his crucial Job for the Community by delivering the ingredients too late, tricked your landlord into eating gifted food, attempted fraud at the Music Exchange to the detritment of a Mundane, giving fake information in consequence of which Mr Belgraves ruined his most expensive suit and set a Gumiho* free. That's quite impressive, even for a Dokkaebi*. (Editor's Note: I'll soon make extra posts for their kin, links above lead to the respective wikipedia entries)

Ouf, when you put it like that, it's really a lot ö.Ö'

Regulator: "And all this while you knew your Community is only allowed to remain here if each and every member acts responsible. All of us need to keep a low profile and do everything in our powers to not reveal our existence to the Mundane. This is no place to be careless and only think of oneself." The Regulator was right. He was a threat to their whole Community.

Regulator: "Any last words?" There's no use denying it. He just doesn't belong here. And there is nothing for him to fight for in this world. Not anymore. He is a nuisance for everyone around him. The Community would be better off - and safer - without him and his shenanigans.

And even though he only understood half of all the crimes he was being charged for, he stood up and proclaimed: "I plead guilty of all crimes I'm being charged for and I fully accept my punishment." Regulator: "Very well then."

The phone of the Regulator made an almost inaudible sound. Regulator: "Ms Ngyen and the Kareems are here with Mr Belgraves. You wait here." Gods. Dtui and the wealthy couple are interrogating poor Leander!

The Regulator left and Jack only hoped it would be enough he admitted all his sins and took all the blame on him so they'd leave at least Leander alone. None of all of Jack's wrongdoings were his fault. The irony that Jack could see the billboard of the park with the Moon Rabbit statue from here... Where he'd spend such a happy evening together with his friends... Maybe the last sight he would look at in this world. And where will he be getting banned to?

'Who's gonna pick you up when you fall? Who's gonna hang it up when you call? Who's gonna pay attention to your dreams? Yeah, who's gonna plug their ears when you scream?

Who's gonna tell you when it's too late? Who's gonna tell you things aren't so great? You can't go on, thinking nothing's wrong, but now Who's gonna drive you home tonight?

Who's gonna hold you down when you shake? Who's gonna come around when you break?'

The Cars - Drive

Playlist Chapter 1 - Work: -> Spotify -> youtube Playlist Chapter 2 - The day before you came: -> Spotify -> youtube

Previous (Fox on the run) - Next (For whom the Bell tolls) The 'As if it's your last' Story Hub is -> here Read Chapter 2 from the beginning -> here Read Chapter 1 from the beginning -> here Chapter 1 Episode Overview -> here Chapter 2 Episode Overview -> here

[bardic-tales]

Day 24 | Day 26

31 days of FF 7 Headcanons: Day 25: Connection to AVALANCHE

In the chessboard that is fate, Bianca Moore stands not as a piece to be played but as a force that upends the board entirely. Her role in the conflict is not one of reluctant allegiance or hidden redemption. She is not a wayward hero or tragic villain seeking absolution. She is conviction incarnate, born of suffering, reforged in ruin, and devoted to a cause that renders her diametrically opposed to AVALANCHE’s mission.

As they fight to preserve a dying world, Bianca labors to end it: alongside Sephiroth, her god, her tether, and her lover. To understand her role is to understand that the battle for the Planet is not just a clash of ideologies but of realities. Bianca is not trying to save anything. She is here to unmake everything: to stop the cycle of hatred and pain that's defined her life.

Possible Trigger Warnings: abuse, body horror, death, existential dread, forced experimentation, loss of autonomy, psychological trauma, religious extremism, self-destruction, violence

Bianca Moore holds no allegiance to AVALANCHE and views their mission with a detached, almost contemptuous regard. Though she acknowledges their resolve and the courage it takes to stand against an empire like Shinra, she sees their fight as tragically shortsighted. To Bianca, AVALANCHE is akin to trying to mend a severed limb with a bandage: noble in spirit but doomed in execution. She views their rebellion as a distraction from the greater truth. The Planet is already dying, not merely because of Shinra’s greed, but because the cycle of existence itself is broken. In her eyes, AVALANCHE is fighting to preserve a corrupted world that is beyond redemption.

Her disdain for their idealism is sharpened by her own suffering at the hands of Shinra, Ravenscroft, and Hojo, which eclipses any sense of solidarity she might have felt. While AVALANCHE fights for liberation, Bianca was turned into cattle, vivisected, and reforged in the name of science, and Sephiroth in their shared dreamscape, turned into a vessel for ruin. They do not know what it means to be owned by Shinra in the way she was: and in a lesser way that the parasite Jenova was. Their battle is external. Hers was internal, cosmic, apocalyptic. This divide makes her see AVALANCHE’s mission not just as futile, but irrelevant in the face of her and Sephiroth’s plan to remake reality entirely.

Bianca’s connection to Sephiroth renders her fundamentally incompatible with AVALANCHE’s cause. While they strive to stop Meteor, she supports it. While they fight to preserve the Planet, she aids Sephiroth in his quest to merge with the Lifestream, erase the current world, and ride its husk to another realm. To her, destruction is not evil. It is necessary. It is a holy act. She doesn’t crave power for its own sake, but to fulfill a prophecy encoded in her very soul: her and Sephiroth’s very souls. AVALANCHE’s interference in that purpose is not only misguided. It is offensive. They are ants trying to halt an inevitability: the destruction and rebirth of Existence itself. Despite her disdain, Bianca does not underestimate AVALANCHE.

She respects their willpower, their ability to shake the foundations of Shinra, and even their capacity to challenge Sephiroth. Cloud Strife, in particular, draws her interest: not out of admiration but because of what he represents, an echo of broken legacy, a failed experiment turned unexpected threat. She recognizes the irony of a fragile, fractured person like Cloud standing between gods and apocalypse. In her darker moments, she wonders if his existence is another test from the Creator, a splinter in the gears of fate, someone that would eventually have to be removed from the equation. No matter how much Sephiroth enjoys sadistically torturing Cloud. She views Cloud and Sephiroth’s rivalry as a distraction to their greater purpose. Remaking Existence is more of a priority than his rivalry with Cloud.

Ultimately, Bianca’s fate was never meant to align with AVALANCHE, because she does not want to save the Planet. She wants to replace it. As she was remade and choose to submit after having her trauma twisted by Sephiroth in the dreamscape, Bianca is not here to defend life as it is. She is meant to end it in the name of her, Sephiroth’s, and, even, Jenova’s divinity. Her bond with Sephiroth is sacred and absolute, and it places her forever on the opposite end of AVALANCHE’s war. They are agents of preservation. She is a herald of obliteration. While they cry out for justice, Bianca is to bring deliverance. Her hands are stained with the Planet’s blood, and she isn’t looking back.

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[czerwonykasztelanic]

asking you your "top 5" anything: (persons with rabbit pfps) Lenin quotes

5. "Things are harder for our generation than they were for our fathers. But in one respect we are luckier than our fathers. We have begun to learn and are rapidly learning to fight [...] We are fighting better than our fathers did. Our children will fight better than we do, and they will be victorious." (from The Working Class and NeoMalthusianism - the past must not eclipse the present, nor should it be seen as superior the future, for a new world will come!)

4. "The sacrifices of the Commune, heavy as they were, are made up for by its significance for the general struggle of the proletariat: it stirred the socialist movement throughout Europe, it demonstrated the strength of civil war, it dispelled patriotic illusions, and destroyed the naïve belief in any efforts of the bourgeoisie for common national aims. [...] The lesson learnt by the proletariat will not be forgotten. The working class will make use of it, as it has already done in Russia during the December uprising. [...] And although these magnificent uprisings of the working class were crushed, there will be another uprising, in face of which the forces of the enemies of the proletariat will prove ineffective, and from which the socialist proletariat will emerge completely victorious." (from Lessons of the Commune - when reactionary forces temporarily triumph over world-historical progress, to assert that failed revolutions are revolutions nonetheless is to avoid despair)

3. "One of the biggest and most dangerous mistakes made by Communists is the idea that a revolution can be made by revolutionaries alone." (Popular support! The vanguard must be firmly rooted in the masses to wield legitimate power! Thermidorrrrr)

2. "I must say that the tasks of the youth in general [...] might be summed up in a single word: learn." (from his speech to the Youth Leagues; ever time I question the importance of education and self-improvement, every time the pursuit of knowledge appears to me a futile and vainglorious squandering of time, I remember that it is not just a right, but a duty - even if it's as trivial as, I don't know, reading the procès-verbal of the National Convention from June 1794)

1. "[...] there is nothing more dangerous than illusions (and vertigo, particularly at high altitudes). Communists who have no illusions, who do not give way to despondency, and who preserve their strength and flexibility "to begin from the beginning" over and over again in approaching an extremely difficult task, are not doomed (and in all probability will not perish)." (from On Ascending a High Mountain; predictably enough, I have a certain weakness for geographical metaphors...)

[zombiecicada]

That was… not how they wanted their first mission to go.

They could already hear Enmity taunting them for being unsuccessful at such a simple task. There was nothing more simple than finding and killing the saviour of the universe. They had nobody to blame but themself and their morals.

No amount of debriefing or training prepared them for some wimpy runt blowing up like a hydrogen bomb.

If it was not for the horrifying amount of embarrassment flooding through its body that far rivalled any pain they felt, they might’ve considered telling Doctor Cruce they needed a raise when they got back.

….

Were they….even getting paid at all?

…

…

…

Better yet, where were they?

It finally pried its eyes open. Pain in their eyes wasn’t anything abnormal. They supposed, cynically, that they could add ‘pain from being blown up’ to their roster of different experienced painful sensations.

The pain was quickly forgotten as its surroundings came into place, a void… but this one was different. It wasn’t white. It was a mix of blues and dark purples, massive glowing shards of some glassy material floating around with them.

And then the equally as massive eyes blindly fixated upon them.

Rem bit back a sharp gasp, spinning helplessly in the spot as gravity seemed to be nonexistent. The massive beast merely listened to the faint sounds of the small sefortian struggle, the massive rune dotted tendrils making up almost a mane around the head of the beast slowly weaving like black waves.

Perhaps it was the realization that struggle was futile, or the final onset of recognition. It stopped struggling.

“You’re a riftwrath. A demonbeast.” They uttered out. “I thought- all of your kind were bested in the war.”

Maybe this was an ally..?

Rem was suddenly overcome with the weirdest, most awful sensation they had ever felt in their entire life, every finger going stiff, their wings clenching, their tail going rigged.

Their mouth moving all on its own, like their body being puppeteered, as their own voice spoke back to them.

“Is that what Nightmare said? That my kind was ‘bested’, as if we were not some spite at life, machines built to participate in a war not our own? We were bested, not slaughtered as we fought a doomed battle against the brightest celestial?”

The force let go of Rem’s limbs, they shook and gasped and tried not to heave, clutching their chest as they realized autonomy had been returned to the body that seconds ago had been controlled and used to speak, all while their mind was helplessly aware.

“…….. what.” Rem choked out, a scream of protest being silenced as the force once again grabbed it.

“Nightmare left me to rot for failing to be a useful pawn in his game. You are simply his next pawn in this war. When your duty complete, succeed or fail, this board will be wiped and his pawns replaced, you need escape while there is still a chance to do so.”

Rem gasped a little less when they were let go this time, eyes stinging fiercely as orange tinted tears bubbled up around the corners of its eyes.

“Nngn.. hhhnn…” Rem panted, they needed to get out of here. Their paws clenched, electricity running throughout their feathers. Their tail twisted attempting to right themself, if this was even right side up.

“Let me out of here,” it demanded, the demonbeast looming over them like a black mountain didn’t grab them again, and Rem swallowed back saliva and bared their teeth. “Let. Me. OUT.”

They shot a bolt of electricity at the monster, the monster shook his head a bit as if he was shaking off stubborn water droplets, before flicking Rem like it was nothing more than a pesky bug.

Their eyes slammed shut just before the limb hit them, and like waking from a dream where you fell to your death, just before the impact they were awake again, stumbling upwards. Their wings and tail slammed by the return of gravity, their chest aching from the sharp inhales.

Back in the void. The first one. The weird white one. Completely alone.

….

……

Maybe they’d lay down for just a minute. Not to think about the horrifying words that they- he-

No. It … just needed to rest for a minute and then get back to work. Shut up, do their job, and as long as they did that, everything would be fine.