#anyone want a private show?
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From tonight’s pole dancing sess! Can’t wait to have one in my own place for private shows 😏
#me#nonbinary#gay#lgbt#tattoos#alternative fashion#trans#trans masc#i am a pole dancer#pole fitness#polestar#pole art#pole dancing#pole dance#can’t wait to have my own pole#for more fun#and pain#pole dancing hurts#pole bruises#anyone want a private show?#for fun#I am taken
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brittany mahomes being like the #1 source of taylor personal photos these days is so tragic. I miss when I didn't know that woman existed
#i don't want to be reminded about this friendship 😐 but it seems she posts more private event/outing type photos with taylor than anyone#so she's always showing up#talking#taylor swift
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I previously wrote that Manon is a Scorpio and if I want to narrow it down to a specific date I’m 100% sure she’ll have an iconic birth day because it’s Manon (it’s unintentional on her part tho) so I’d say she was born on November 11
Dorian strikes me as a Leo because of his personality. Unfortunately for him, he has a normal birth day so I’d say he’s probably born on august 16
#booklr#books and reading#throne of glass#manon blackbeak#tog#dorian havilliard#manon x dorian#manorian#he makes such a huge deal of Manon’s birthday like he found out when it is on accident and he didn’t let it go#because he’s used to parties and celebrations that go on for WEEKS#and there is Manon who barely even remembers her own birthday#because it was never celebrated and she lowkey hates it because she didn’t have a good time being alive (until she met him)#so he made it his mission to go all out when it comes to her birthday#he literally spends all of November celebrating#sometimes it’s a private affair in their home#and some times they go out and he always has something planned#he also makes sure Manon gets to mingle with others#so me regularly lets her meet with his friends#he*#he really just loves her so much and wants to make up for lost time#he’s so angry about it tho like why wouldn’t anyone celebrate her birthday#but then he learns this applies to pretty much everything including Christmas#he’s so mad but also so ready to show her all of these things and create memories with her
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just thinking again (based on some of this blog's activity)... I felt it was probably worth saying that if you've followed me for Nicktoons Unite or Danny Phantom content, please don't be expecting any more. I have no plans to ever draw it again and while I've tried to be appreciative of the fact that ppl still seem to like that content, it does make me sad that that's the only thing that still gets the most attention on this blog even tho I want nothing to do with it anymore 😔
obviously I'd love if I was only known for my OC content but I know that's not how the internet works, lol. I'm trying my best but judging by the constant influx of activity just for Nicktoons and DP (and the fact that all of the blogs recommended on this blog are phandom-related and have been for 6 freaking years 😭), it seems like I'll never escape that being the only thing most of tumblr associates this blog with. wahhh
anyway. just letting y'all know that like. if you've been following me for a while with the expectation of someday seeing new art within those fandoms, you might as well look elsewhere because I'll just disappoint you ><;; rip
#i've tried marking some of the art as private but it doesn't help because it still gets passed around#its like. the dp stuff specifically is the only thing that ppl actually reblog consistently and i /should/ be grateful#but its just disappointing when i personally care so much more about my own original content and i know that never does as well#compared to fandom stuff#anyway#just some thoughts i guess#i'm not mad at anyone specifically i just feel kinda bad that i've grown a bit resentful towards these fandoms as a whole#because of how often i see the art show up in my activity feed even tho i dont want to see it#gonna actually turn off notifications for the posts tho after all this time because it's finally really getting to me#but i figured i'd still just let y'all know that i'm not gonna be drawing it anymore#spectre says#text post#vent post#delete later probably#im not gonna tag any of the fandoms but unfortunately this post will probably show up in the tags anyway#because it's in the body of the text kfjghsfg rip#oh well
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Fascinating how misgendering is akin to and on the same level as real life physical violence to you guys. But calling someone an abelist slur is a-okay.
Also interesting you resort to calling me a "d*ke" despite me not being a lesbian. Almost like "t*rf = lesbian" to you and you also hate lesbians.
Also note how none of these things are arguments. You can't argue against the facts laid out, and so you resort to immature homophobic and ableist insults to what? Try and offend me?
Wasn't your community just pissing and moaning that unfair blog deletion was some egregious horrific phobic offense. Y'alll don't seem to pressed about abusing the system to get people you don't like banned/deleted.
The only pathetic one I see here is you. Tumblr is a side thing for me, I have things I do in the real world that progress my future. What are you doing with your time and life?
#asks#anon#i tried blocking anon to see if it would show a user in my blocked accounts but it didnt#alas i wanted to try and catch whoever it was#tho I'm gonna guess perhaps the artist of the hyena and invertebrate piece. but could be anyone honestly. you're all the same#unless i did it wrong and there is a way to find out who is sending the anons#mutuals I'm really sorry anon is mass reporting. idrk what to say to try and keep your accounts safe? maybe going private for a bit#mass reporting feminist blogs while complaing that tumblr admin is 'q***rphobic' is the same vein as having acab stickers#and then calling the cops on feminists having a meeting or event that doesn't center you
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the most upsetting thing to me about sam on private practice isn’t even that he started off as a somewhat likeable character and ended up being the worst. it’s that the entire show keeps trying to tell me what a “good guy” he is. like every character on the show is always going on and on about what a great person he is and what a decent man he is but his actions just tell me the exact opposite. it drives me absolutely nuts when a show just tells you how you’re supposed to feel about a character regardless of what their actions tell you.
#if anyone in 2023 still cares about this show lmao#remember when he got mad at addison for calling the cops on the guy who was going to keep r*ping his comatose wife#remember when he vehemently didn’t want to have a baby but got al whiny when addison was adamant about him wearing condoms#remember when he had way too much sympathy for yet ANOTHER r*pist and got mad at copper for calling the cops on her#remember when he treated amelia like shit for being an addict#remember when he physically restrained and shook addison#private practice#addison montgomery#greys anatomy
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If I was crazy rich I would pay the cast and writers of Santa Clarita Diet an unacceptable amount of money to make a 2 hour movie finishing the show, and then pay Tom Holland and Paul King an unacceptable amount of money to not make a movie about Fred Astaire.
#I've got nothing against fred astaire it's not that#but he was an extremely private person and hated the idea of a biopic EVER being made about him#he literally had it written into his will that a biopic never be made of his life. like he specifically put that in his will.#which obviously isn't legally binding to anyone anywhere but he just REALLY wanted it known that he didn't want this#which..... tbh I'm not sure you can still be against things when you're dead#and in a way none of this matters because so little is known about fred astaire's personal life (except that he loved skateboarding lol)#so it's not like the movie can even really be about him when you get down to it#and yet it still seems like such a shitty thing to do idk#can't really blame Tom Holland though because it wouldn't be the first time someone was bamboozled into taking a role like that#Lily James claims she was told Pamela Anderson approved the show about her and I believe her#op#shitpost
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does anyone wanna see my tit themed wiskers kandi cuff pattern? originally made it 4 the shits n giggles but I actually really like how it looks lmao
#its private on my kandi pattern profile cause actually making stuff that ppl can see is spooky scary#but. if anyone wants it I can post the link n image on here#only going 2 my show in JAN. AAAAA#phan#<- 4 fandometrics#the beads im gonna use r gonna cost SO MUCH (in my broke world. around 20 quid) but its worth it#do NOT mention spoilers in the notes. I am trying 2 be a spoiler free man#kandi#the kat speaks#terrible influence tour#dan and phil
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talked w/ a friend about this and wanted to post something similar yesterday after a convo i saw also
about people criticizing ttcc / ttcc fans for just... being cog fans? being cog centric? usually coming from people who only like the toons.
and everyone likes what they like! it's okay! but saying that people who like the cogs are horrible and support the bad things they do, is just blatantly wrong. i thought we knew that enjoying villainous and morally Bad / grey characters is... okay? it doesn't mean you support what they do. it's interesting to explore these topics.
i've seen many people just... paint anyone who likes the cogs as horrible because they're "apologists of x and y" and... i dunno. rubs me the wrong way! you do have a point and recognize the cogs do bad things, but liking them as characters means nothing about who you are as a person.
and this is not to say that people who are in toontown for the toons are bad. hell! they are right this IS toontown. i may be on the cog liker side but i like the toons! maybe ocs more than the npcs - mostly because i like my friends and the sheer creativity the toons can bring out!!
SO what i wanna say... i dunno. let's not point fingers...? let's have fun in a goofy cartoon game together??? also complaining about people liking VILLAIN ROBOTS on TUMBLR is kind of funny to me. do you realize where you are. but then again a lot of this i see on discord and in-game as well since i avoid things on tumblr... i am a sensitive little fella i avoid misty fight bc of One Really mean "Critic" guy i saw there and i have been shivering in my bootsies since. so you get me
but like yes ttcc is more cog centric but... that's okay? things could be written better and i still wanna speak on it, and i do thing the toons deserve attention and better writing... but the fact it focuses on the cogs isn't... bad? if you don't like how con centric it is you can go play ttr...? god forbid people have fun and explore the villain's side of things...? i'm not saying either toontown server is better or worse than the other... and everyone can like their own things!!
but like... people will just like the cogs and that's okay and it doesn't make you bad. let's all be friends okay? both sides may be going at each other's necks in-game and the cogs in fact do horrible things - but it's what makes them fun, and it gives the toons things to do in the game!! but we don't gotta !!!!!!!! i may be really sarcastic and sometimes mean in private but like that's me just privately sassing, deep down i think people should just... y'know..? enjoy things.
so yea that's the guzma / cathal thought of today. toon people cog people both people are all awesome as fuck and you keep doing what you're doing i love you toontown isn't toontown without you
#anyways omg god forbid ppl are cog kissers on the robot kissing website /silly#but like!! tt/r may not be for everyone and tt/cc may not be for everyone and THATS OK!! ur not gonna like everything!!#like i accepted tt/r isnt for me but its mostly bc they dont show cog health specifically and i struggle with these things but !! i#heard they are updating that so i might be able to play without getting bored / frustrated again ^^ i havent played properly in yeaaaars#i will still prefer clash bc fixation and?? i LIKE ROBOBTS....!#but tewtow is tewtow its all swag. the least toony thing u can do is bully someone for Liking Robobt. be niceys#like ya i admit im not perfect i also dont like people andhave so much one sided beef and i am sensitive to so many things and i complain#in private but at the end of the day its to make myself feel better and i KNOW to not engage and look away and work on feeling better#bc this stuff does Heehoo upset me bc Mental Health Probulem. but i know everyone should and can do their own thing and have fun#i may complain about (redacted ship) all the time and i dont get it at all but...? bro... just have fun... be free. im not here to stop you#im just not gonna interact as i should. good for both of us! joyous world! happy that ur happy!!!!#why complain abt ppl just Enjoying Cogs like that though................................................ do you not like fun#this is not at anyone specific#my friend did show me tags of a post anonymously#and i vague a person whos name i dont know ingame like A YEAR AGO#and a convo what happened in a server a while back. but its not anyone specific i just wanted to like. speak my thoughts#lets be frense... and if not thats okay lets not argue either then we all stay in our lanes
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is it also painful for some of you to be a phanny with no phanny friends? like i see people online lose the same braincells i did over some tedious, minute and toothrottingly domestic detail, and then go back to my friend group like 'hey hows it going man?'
#i am clawing my face#how do i even begin to explain to anyone how monumentally important it is for me to find a way to make it to the show#somehowwww#im aiming at amsterdam who wants to go#lowkey relieved i will not make it to the show that is in three days? huh?#like#i need to explode over spoilers alone#its a private affair in my evil layer#lair.#im tired.#its five am#what am i doing here#just to suffer?#dnp#dan and phil#dick and penis
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me, the symptoms experiencer, experiencing symptoms: wow gee i wonder what the fuck is happening right now i have no context for why i could possibly feel bad, surely i'm not experiencing symptoms. me, when i figure out it's the symptoms:
#gif warning#medical stuff#man getting labled as a hypochondriac at a formative age (any) was a hell of a kick to the balls#i don't even have those#and yet#me when i've been told all my symptoms can't be real and that i was makign it up for attention so i started just not talking about them#even though in private without anyone around i was still experiencing the symptoms i decided i just Wasn't#because why would my parents be wrong about that - they loved me right?#so if something was concerning they'd be worried if it was a real thing - i wasn't making it up but maybe i was#no one should have taught my father the term psychosomatic#he's the reason it's had to go up on the shelf#mom flat out telling me it was impossible that [redacted] because i was quote ''too young'' for it to be happening#so now i'm old and it's a Real Big Fucking Deal I guess#i'm experiencing the flare/crash i was anticipating and - thank fuck - my brain isn't going down the tubes with it#which is a fucking miracle because this is the lead up to my period and *normally* that's when the PMDD hits real fucking bad#but in a stroke of luck (???) my body decided it was just going to smash itself into the ground Krillin-style#and as i lay here in the crater of my own body's making i'm just like. well at least i don't want to die#which is truly the most throwing thing of everything actually#anyway....#got hEDS put on my medical file for reals though so like#that's in there#that exists#also the look of HORROR on the nurse tech's face when i showed how much distance my hips spread *every month* for my period#i'm LITERALLY going into labor monthly and i've been doing that since i was 11#no fucking WONDER my body has collapsed out from under me if we even just go by that fucking metric like godDAMN#ugh anyway.... i'm. this was NOT the stuff i wanted to focus on this year for personal growth and healing but we're doing it now i guess!#fuck! goddamn! piss in a cup#i have also... failed to do the task i was meant to today and technically there's still time but it's uh. i. i'm gonna need to ask for help#and i HATE asking for help especiallywhen i need it most#another thing my parents have to answer for when they greet whatever judge they find at the end of their lives
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I guess I can't really get behind cas saving dean from hell as a destiel win, or lines like 'you don't think you deserve to be saved', because. this is not a point at which cas is doing because he believes dean is good and loves him or anything but. he saves dean because that's heaven's will. when he reminds dean that cas, and heaven, are who saved him in early s4, it's not him really saying 'you're a good man', it's a debt that he is using, pretty explicitly, to get dean to do what heaven wants. even the handprint reads like... ownership, in a way.
cas is complicit in heaven's manipulation of dean after he's pulled out of hell. that's what makes his rebellion later powerful, because this is an angel who believes in heaven so strongly that he will look into the eyes of the righteous man he saved and tell him that if he doesn't do what he's told, he will throw dean back into hell.
#this is not an anti-cas post to be clear. or even really anti-destiel?#it's just kind of weird that this is all portrayed so romantically when like. that's not how it is in the show.#castiel marks dean because heaven owns his ass. not because he loves him. dean is a tool to them. engraved.#this is a personal thing anyway#i like this about their relationship. i think its more impactful for cas to view dean the same way heaven does at first. as a sword.#and then to learn more about him and to realize that he should trust him over heaven.#rather than him being dtf from the get-go#also because hgnnn dehumanization brain go brrrrr. to get pulled out of hell and for your savior to look at you as a dog that needs to have#his chain yanked and reminded he can be sent back to the pound if he bites#i take it back cas saving dean from hell is a destiel thing in the way that it is cas collaring dean for heaven's use and realizing that#maybe he wants dean collared for his own use deep down. cas who hasn't interacted with anyone but other angels in centuries.#who has lost so many of his siblings to save this one man. who has no real control over what he is ordered to carry out.#looking at dean like. but i can control him. he will obey me. i can be his private god.#yeah its destiel like that i guess#destiel#spn#dean winchester#castiel
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i'm so glad i won't be working with my pi after this month. i think i've reached my limit. i just can't deal with her anymore
#she said 'oh idk if i can make it to your thesis'#SHE IS ON MY THESIS COMMITTEE. SHE'S KNOWN ABOUT THIS FOR A YEARRRRRR#she said she might be on vacation w her bf... instead of going to my fucking thesis defense.#there was a special vote just so she could be on my committee. wdym you have to go on vacation#ALSO i've been asking her to check my calculations for a thing for MONTHS#and she still hasn't. but she made me present on it in front of a bunch of people.#i'd like to note that this calculation is like. the point of my thesis. and she hasn't even bothered to look at it#she forced the interns to work 50 hours last week. they're only being paid for 40.#she hasn't read any part of my thesis... others have but they don't know the details like she does#i told her to read my fucking thesis and she said she had and that it 'looked good'#what does that mean. WHAT does that mean. how do you have no comments. on my thesis. that determines whether i graduate#and then she said i'm ''irresponsible'' bc i went to a concert???#like it didn't affect anything. i showed up to work on time. i completed everything i meant to.#but i guess going to one concert is like. unacceptable.#i'm sooooo sorry i decided to go have fun for one night instead of agonizing about my thesis (that again. she hasn't read)#she asked if i want to give a talk at the new place she got hired at but she now works for fus#which is a incredibly conservative homophobic private catholic university. i've never heard anything positive about it#like they're legally allowed to discriminate against lgbt people... does she know what i fucking look like????#she's so so conservative but she only interacts with other conservative catholics#and doesn't understand how fucking vile her views are. and she wonders why people don't like her#like maybe she should shut the fuck up about how she thinks abortion is a sin at work!!#she once said 'the only time i feel uncomfortable in my skin is when i talk about being a conservative catholic at work'#AND THEN SHE SAID 'it really makes me understand how hijabis feel'#IN FRONT OF MY HIJABI COLLEAGUE. HELLO???? like she is not persecuted for being a conservative catholic#i literally started laughing when she said that. i think i said 'please get real'. and she's still mad#anyway. my colleague decided to no longer work with my pi. idk if it was bc of that comment#she mentioned that once i leave there won't be anyone who understands the data on the project anymore#like yeah. maybe you should've looked at the data. like at all#and not had an unpaid master's student do literally all the work for you
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holy shit i think this past saturday was the first time in TEN ENTIRE MONTHS that i forgot to take my pills for a day
#I'VE NEVER BEEN THAT CONSISTENT BEFORE THAT'S A WILD RECORD#meds reminder app my beloved#i broke my streak BUT DAMN WAS THAT AN IMPRESSIVE STREAK!#and i took my meds yesterday i do know that#so I've only missed a single day since i started these in January#not counting the time my old psychiatrist refused to let me refill my meds in time so i had to take them every other day#bc i didn't want to run out too soon and just Stop Taking Them for a whole week so we did every other day instead#no longer seeing that entire FACILITY bc they were so fucking awful with this shit I just LEFT and my new one is much nicer#that shitty facility was the same one that trapped me in a room bc they didn't bother to make sure wheelchair users can open their doors#and i was in a fucking. windowless room with a heavy steel door and a lot of insulation bc it's supposed to be a private doctor chat room#which is honestly fucking STUPID that I'm expected to show up in person for an appointment#and then they stick me in a room to fucking VIDEO CALL the doctor#like. fucking. THIS COULD HAVE BEEN A FUCKING EMAIL#except replace email with just video call#they didn't need my vitals for anything they didn't need me there physically WHY WAS I STILL FORCED TO COME IN#JUST LET ME VIDEO CALL THE DOCTOR AT HOME LIKE. WHAT THE FUCK#and then they forgot me in the fucking call room and didn't let me out until i had my mom grab me#AND THEN THEY GOT MAD AT MY MOM FOR IT. THEY WERE LIKE 'you could've just called for us' I WAS FUCKING SCREAMING SOBBING#once i move far enough away from that facility to feel safe posting its location#I'm making a PSA post for anyone else in the area#bc holy FUCK that was awful and the fact that THAT'S the facility that our local hospital directs people to is absolutely INSANE
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#Wrestling is Bad Actually#(My hater tag in case you didn't know so block if you don't wanna see anymore of my bitching. Although there might not be much more cuz...)#Ricky isn't injured he's just not being used and he's probably on his way out#The Trent/OC feud is now all about Don Callis for some reason#Toni Storm is still stubbornly/incompetently being booked as a heel despite never getting booed#And Dynamite is essentially just The Young Bucks Show and nothing else anymore#AND NOW Chuck might be legit retired#Sammy Guevara's coming back#And Private Party are done??#Jeez Tony I've already decided to stop watching AEW - you don't need to give me more reasons!#Well. Guess that's all folks!#If anyone wants me you can find me in the corner silently mourning the AEW that I fell in love with all those years ago#Because that AEW is dead and gone#A pity.
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I hope this doesn't sound too weird but, are you open to people just - dropping a message in your inbox to chat? I just think you re a really cool guy with a lot of interesting stuff to say and I want to talk about it more but I don't know how open you are to that !!
dhdhgh I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to answer this one, because I'm not exactly opposed to chatting with people, I'm just. not really online! I publish asks and sometimes it takes me forever to reply, I only really check my messages once a month because my notifications are broken and the bots are annoying™, and frequently I forget to reply to comments because I'm. mostly just busy offline with other work because I Have Bills To Pay. sorry! I don't really have a good answer for this RIP
#ALL OF THAT SAID. feel free to send asks about whatever if you want to. cannot guarantee when i'll reply tho. time. wish there was more#of it in a day!#it does not help that im an extremely private person and i originally made this blog so that i could#further separate the space from my main art blog lmao#bc of that i find it a little off putting when people ask ahead of time but also include things like 'you seem cool' because now im like#oh no. i cant relax now. im extremely Boring as a person i just have a pinball machine for a brain.#i think i reply to twitter DMs with more reliability but im also not recommending anyone make an account there#free yourself. im only still there because all the cool ancient history artists are there#i have been working on a. not exactly a personal blog bc i have one already but its a weird second space type of thing.#mostly just to post about shows and books im reading. i might end up linking it here.#ask tag
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