#anyhow; thanks for sharing your thoughts
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ratstuckinamarble · 7 months ago
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The show isn't cancelled! Personally, I don't know how likely we are to get a third season (I'm trying to stay optimistic without getting my hopes up), but claims of cancellation were disproven.
And I do agree with your points! The allegory here being so well done is exactly why I was frustrated they didn't make Draculaura queer in any way. Portraying negative experiences queer people can face more indirectly was a good move imo, and in combination with the show having actual queer characters, it doesn't feel cowardly. I just prefer when characters are what is being alluded to through them as well, I like to think that's understandable. Making Draculaura trans or bi, for example, would tie into everything wonderfully without any big changes needing to be made.
So my issue was never that they used this topic as a plotline, I think they did a good job there. I just feel like that last aspect was missing.
Now, pulling it all together by giving Toralei an interest in witchcraft too... I hadn't considered that. Very cool idea!
All right, time to discuss Spell the Beans, this is your spoiler warning. I've previously talked about how I view Draculaura practicing witchcraft this gen as a gay allegory, and considering this episode's theme, I have thoughts. Buckle up, this analysis of sorts will get long. (Also, homophobia will be mentioned)
What kicks the episode off is Drac losing a potion bottle, which gets found and is the reason for Bloodgood calling everyone's parents in to help search. Once again, Toralei wants her to be found out, and with all the talk of witchcraft making Draculaura feel like herself, it being something she won't consider giving up despite it having the potential to cause so many problems for her (Toralei trying to snitch on her, her parents or other students potentially reacting badly, expulsion), frames it like she has no choice about being a witch. Like it's innate (You know. Like being queer). Which also means Toralei is basically trying to out her which is... not great (I like her but I can't deny that- girlie has issues).
A scene soon after that shows Draculaura freaking about about the fact that her dad will be there, specifically to find the witch. What's interesting is that she clearly doesn't intend to keep this a secret from him. Here's some quotes:
"I should have told dad about my witchcraft last weekend when I planned to! But then he saw my report card, and he was so proud. He kept saying how I was following in his bat steps to become the premier first and foremost top monster."
"That's the vampire way. Once something is decided, they don't change it, no matter how silly, outdated, or pfft-y it sounds. That's why it's so hard to tell him I do witchcraft."
Clawdeen asks if she'll tell him when he gets there, to which she says: "In the middle of a witchhunt? No way. As the Pfft, he has to uphold the rules. He'd expell me!"
So what can we gather from this? She was planning to come out to him, most likely because since she views witchcraft as such a core part of herself, something she has to admit to truly be able to be herself around him. She planned it out and everything (as I'm sure a lot of us have before coming out so someone. I sure did), but backed down because he was proud, dissuading her from ruining his positive view of her in that moment. She knows he won't like her being a witch thanks to his outdated views, and yet all that's kept her from telling him sooner was fear of someone so close to her not accepting her (again, relatable).
Now the only reason she won't tell him is because in a school environment, she'd get punished. This is rather bleek, but there are still many places in the world where you can get expelled for being queer, including several schools in the US from what I've gathered, so it's an easy comparison to make.
Dracula holds a presentation on why witchcraft is forbidden, concluding that it's a danger to monsters, to which Draculaura says to herself: "Fine, some witches are bad, but witchcraft isn't inherently bad". It's reminiscent of queer people getting clumped together as a threat to society, children, the family, all that nonsense. People have always loved to take singular incidents of a queer person doing something abhorrent, and taking that as "proof" that all queer folks are a danger and should be shunned, or worse, not be allowed in certain jobs or be persecuted.
When Dracula asks Draculaura to help him find the witch, she immediately goes from happy to see him to uncomfortable. Like getting stuck in yet another conversation with your parents where they go on about their discomfort with gay or trans people or whatever it is that time, she's stuck with him demonizing witchcraft right before her, not knowing he's making her feel awful the whole time.
(A sillier sidenote, but the "Witch-Detector" made me think of the whole gaydar thing. Not relevant though.)
Draculaura ends up telling him the truth because she doesn't want Toralei to get expelled for something she didn't do. And her dad doesn't want to believe her. He lists down reasons that basically say 'you're too respectable to be a witch', but she leaves no room for doubt. And he's extremely disappointed.
She tries to explain to him that his views are skewed by his preconceived notions, and he shouts at her. "So you're breaking the rules for some frivolous hobby? You must give it up, now! Before it ruins your chance to be Pfft!" She tells him she doesn't want to follow in his footsteps. That she didn't know how to tell him because she knew he'd be upset. And he says, that well, of course he is! He treats it like something she can change, when the show never treats that like an option. Telling her he's worried for her future. When she tries to show him the beauty in what she's doing, he just leaves her standing there.
I do appreciate this scene. Many of us aren't lucky enough to have parents who immediately accept their kid after they come out, and the show built up to a bad reaction from him. This was bound to happen. A lot of parents don't want their kids to be gay because of homophobia, yes, but there's also often an element of fear. Of others thinking the same way as them, mistreating them because of it, having fewer chances for your future. It's all reflected in his reaction.
He ends up talking to Apollo (Clawdeen's dad), going on a whole tangent of what his super "handsome friend" (Why do you want him to see you as handsome so bad?🤨) (Also the friend is Dracula), should do if his daughter isn't quite who he thought she was, liking something he sees as dangerous, when he believed she liked "Respectable things" (there that is again), he worries she won't be happy. What I just said. Apollo explains that his kid's happiness is more important than his own opinions on what she's doing, and that she'll be safer if he supports her.
And queer people are safer when they are supported. Mental health wise.
It's enough for him to reconsider. He ends up talking to Draculaura, and they team up to get Toralei out of trouble without revealing Drac as a witch. He tells her that he'll do his best to change the rules.
So what are my thoughts? This was a fairly well executed episode, in my opinion. From my queer allegory perspective, the topic was handled in a manner very remisncent of common real life experiences. Dracula's initial negative reaction was hard to watch, but was the right choice to include it, and while he was rather quick to change his mind, for my taste, I do understand the show not wantig to leave their younger audience on such a sour note. While him only (reluctantly) changing his mind because the witch happened to be someone he loved was hypocritical, it's realistic. We often fear the things we've been taught to shun until it applies to someone close to us. Until it becomes more personal.
Overall, I'm content enough with how this was done. Most of all, since most of Draculaura's friends still don't appear to know by the end of the episode, and witchcraft is still forbidden, I wonder how that will be handeled. I also wonder if Toralei's outing attempts will ever be mentioned and discussed.
That's all I have to say for now. Thank you if you got this far, and please, tell me your thoughts!
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endless-ineffabilities · 3 months ago
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chemical override (7)
Ewan Mitchell x actress!reader
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a/n: again, I'm thanking all of yous for fueling the chemical override fire! Your comments/messages are so sweet and hilarious and wild - just as this story demands <3 Happy reading!
series masterlist ▪︎ main masterlist
The arrangement you and Ewan share is in place, but jealousy rears its ugly head when another costar takes an interest in you. It isn't Aemond's allegiance that renders Ewan green-eyed, so to speak...
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London
Whenever Ewan needs you, you answer the call.
Because, in truth, you need him too. This might not be the most savoury of arrangements; it might not be what you pictured in your head when you thought of getting back together.
But this way, you can have him, and he can have you.
It's a win-win situation. Even if you're not his, and he's not yours, as he so nicely put it.
So you're there when his need arises. Which, as it happens, arises often - intense, wanton, and greedy. He takes you for himself, your body left littered with markings that can only be from his teeth, his fingers, his aching manhood.
Beads of sweat would cloud your vision as the side of your face is pressed to the mattress, your legs bent to give him better access, so that he sinks deeper. He would whisper, - you're mine... you're mine... fuckin' mine, darling - when he leans down to pant roughly in your ear, momentarily forgetting about the one condition of this whole thing.
You're not his. But as he finishes inside of you, claiming your lips in a bruising kiss, you also have it in you to conveniently forget.
Your respective apartments in London set the stage for your trysts. Ewan comes over so often that he's had to use the back entrance, after getting papped once on a foggy Sunday morning, leaving your apartment building in the same clothes that he wore when he entered at midnight.
LATE NIGHT RENDEZVOUS! - on page 6! Game of Thrones spinoff stars can't get enough of each other!
When Ewan said that the whole thing was going to be a secret, he must have failed to account for the near-impossibility of that notion for a celebrity.
What can be kept secret for those in your line of work?
A romance between two young, highly coveted actors will see the light of day eventually, aided by the blinding flashes of papparazzi cameras.
Predictably, your friends catch on and demand to know how you little lovebirds found your way back together, because of course, they always knew you would.
Sadly, you have to burst Phia's bubble when she calls one evening. "We're not back together."
A pause. She mulls it over. "But the papers..."
"I know."
"He's been seeing you... " She claims, her tone growing unsure.
"He has."
"Then what... oh." You can practically picture the realisation coming across her face. Would it be accompanied by distaste or disappointment? Neither is good anyhow.
"We're seeing each other. But, not really, if you get what I mean."
"No!" she exclaims. You can hear shuffling in the background, like she just slammed the book she was reading shut. "Whose brilliant idea was this?"
"That's doesn't mat - "
"It's Ewan's, isn't it?" she answers, confirming her own suspicion. "That little devious bastard."
"It's not his fault," you find yourself shaking your head, then you startle as the buzzer to your apartment gets your attention. The routine is in place - it's the receptionist letting you know that Ewan is in the lobby. Speak of the devil...
Hmm. You walk to the intercom to let him upstairs, thinking of him coming to claim his prize. But he's not the devil - he's my twisted angel, whose heart I broke.
Phia isn't finished. "What do you mean, it's not his fault? If this was his idea, then let me just talk to the lad and screw his bloody head on straight."
You stand by the door, waiting for his arrival, because whenever Ewan needs you, you're there.
You need him too.
"Phi, I... I want this," you reply. "I have to go."
"Babe, we're not done here. You're not getting off easy."
"I know, I know," you smile at her genuine concern. "Maybe you're right, maybe this all wrong." But...
You know you don't have to say it outright. It's there to see, clear as day.
You love him.
She sighs loudly, resigning herself to the truth of her friend's predicament. "You'll figure this out, the both of you."
"Hope so, Phi." The doorbell rings. You rush through your goodbyes, dropping the call with a promise to keep her updated on what she deems a ridiculous situation.
You greet him at the door, and he stands there, with his black hoodie obscuring his face like he's Daemon about to do some nefarious act of sorts. And he just might. He chews on his lip, and smirks as he takes you in.
"Darling," he greets as he lets himself in. He shrugs off his hoodie and drops it in its usual corner, before beckoning for you with his arms reaching.
He runs his fingers through your hair, as he kisses your neck and inhales your scent, purring, " - fuckin' missed you, beautiful - " as his skilled fingers find the hem of your old shirt.
"My darling girl," he says, and you so badly want to hate him, because he's not being fair. Why does he get to act like this matters to him, when he made it clear that this is only so both your needs are met? Why does he look at you in a way that makes your heart skip a beat in hope, with those same blue eyes that blazed when he once said he loved you?
How can you make sure that you don't fall back in love with him, when that love was never truly gone?
"Ewan," you moan as he pushes you against a wall, his rough hands kneading your flesh. You help him pull his shirt over his head, and your fingers drag upward along his skin until it finds the silver chain around his neck. You use it to pull him even closer, not a breadth of space between you.
He kisses you, and it's like an anchor finding home.
Yours or his, it matters little.
It nearly bubbles out of the two of you - those forbidden three words - each time his hips slam right into yours. It's almost there, fighting, waiting to be heard. His 'I really do fucking love you', and your 'I'm sorry about everything, about lying, all I ever wanted was you.'
Nearly. If only things were that simple.
He never stays for long afterward. Small talk is shared - about his new film, the ongoing production for yours, the upcoming engagements you both have for season 3 of House of the Dragon. The bloody weather, even.
The holidays have come and gone, and soon the two of you will again have to fly out to work - you, back to Atlanta; him, to LA for the pre-production of his film with Jenna Ortega.
He took on the film after all, and you should be relieved, but it's hard to feel any sense of ease when you know he will have to be with her in a way that he can't be with you. To the rest of the world, soon enough, they will have to play at being together. Your only claim to him rests in between the sheets, in the countless hollow trysts to be shared.
He doesn't reach for you after the deed is done, after his clothes are back in place and his hair is relieved of that post-sex tousle. As if touching you would cast him aflame.
But you feel his eyes linger on you, all the time, especially when you try to avert your gaze.
What is he thinking, you wonder. Who does he see?
On his way out, he has to deal with an obstacle in order to retrieve his hoodie. An adorable one, at that. Your black Bobtail cat, Sansa, nestles comfortably atop it. Her paws grip the cotton material of the hoodie as Ewan tries to pull it away.
"She likes you," you smile at the sight of Ewan gingerly trying to lift Sansa so she doesn't lash out at him. Even though the likelihood to that is low, with Sansa taking so well to Ewan's constant presence, so much so that you sometimes find her meowing at the door waiting for him to come back. The traitor.
"Good girl," he whispers to her, his hoodie almost released from the weight of her fluffy shape. "That's it."
Then he turns to you, smiling as he shrugs his hoodie back on. "I don't think she wants me to leave."
Like mother, like daughter, comes your thought. But when he straightens, and appraises you with a sideways glance, an amused hum escaping his lips, you realise that you said it out loud.
He smirks openly to himself, his ego blossoming. You roll your eyes at him, mumbling, "Oh, give me a break."
He simply shrugs, walking over to the door.
"I'll call you," he calls over his shoulder as a matter of courtesy, but he sounds uncertain, and the question lingers. Please don't say no, his tone practically begs.
How can you ever?
Arms crossed in an attempt to act nonchalant, leaning against the wall, you smile and say, "Try not to miss me too much, Mitchell."
His eyes linger as they always do. "Impossible task," he responds, casually, unaware that he just upended your whole world with his words.
He solidifies the grip he has on you, before he leaves.
And so the fucked up cycle continues.
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Los Angeles
A ginger tabby cat slinks around Ewan's ankles as he sits in the director's office, reminding him of your Sansa and the way she would slink in between your bodies the moment she finds an opening, which is usually after the heated roll in the hay.
He smiles to himself on instinct, remembering how you once shared that you wanted to adopt another cat, preferably a Ragdoll, and name him Benjicat.
"Benjicat?" Ewan had asked.
"Yeah," you smiled, as you stroked a purring Sansa between her ears. "Benjicat Blackwood."
Ewan merely blinked, the connection dawning on him, the brilliance of your idea not lost on his supposedly indifferent mind. He could not hold back his warm and appreciative smile as he gazed at you, and for a moment, he pretended that things were back as they were.
He briefly had the idea that, perhaps, you should adopt the future Benjicat together.
Until the bitter thought crossed his mind - he wasn't the one who quashed that possibility first.
In the office in LA, Jenna sits daintily across from him, still aloof and somewhat of a stranger. She had given him a shy smile when she sat down at the table, exchanged pleasantries and surface-level compliments, the works.
Ewan feels nervous, almost ill at ease, and he normally would be able to single out the reasons why. It could be the notion of meeting an acclaimed director and his future costars. Trying not to stumble on his words, messing up their first impression of him. Maybe he had chainsmoked one cigarette too many before the meeting, worsening the anxiety-inducing effect of his staple black coffee with six sugars.
But this is different. He knows the thing he is dreading is when the matter of the PR business will be brought up.
So he doesn't know what emotion comes over him when the director, Autumn de Wilde, lightly remarks in an attempt to break the tension, "So, Ewan, how's your girlfriend?"
"M-my girlfriend?"
"Yeah," she says jovially, "your costar right? It's all over the socials."
"Oh, I love her," Jenna chimes in. "Is she back in England or is she filming somewhere?"
She's not my girlfriend, is what he should say, but he can't push the words out of his mouth. He's not even sure he wants to. After all, that is why he had the idea for the friends with benefits arrangement in the first place - because he can't cope with the fact that you're not his girfriend anymore.
"Mmm, yeah, she's - uhhh - she's filming in Atlanta," Ewan answers, dodging the main question, but not really.
"Well, say hello to her for me," Autumn says. "She's a keeper, huh? What with her being okay with the PR bullshit you will have to do."
Jenna purses her lips apologetically at him, then remarks, "I don't like that Bruce guy. I know some people who worked with him, and they share the sentiment."
Ewan feels lighter, knowing that they're on the same page. He asks tentatively, "That PR thing... is it set in stone or - ?"
Autumn sighs, "Apparently so, kid. But I heard along the grapevine that great ol' Brucey is dealing with some suit and he might have to pull out of the film."
"Some suit?" Ewan asks.
"A lawsuit," Jenna says.
"Oh." What the fuck. "If he pulls out then what that does mean for us?"
"Halle-fuckin-lujah, that's what," Autumn laughs. "More creative control, more logistics control... more happiness for everyone, really."
"Does that mean the PR relationship will be scrapped?" Ewan blurts out, before sheepishly adding to Jenna, "I mean, no offense - "
"None taken," she shakes her head at him. "I never had a liking for that stuff anyway."
"Well, we'd have to consult with the rest of the execs but they're a lot more likely to be conducive to requests," Autumn says.
Ewan feels a rush of relief, one he immediately wishes he can share with you. If you only you stuck it out with him. If only you didn't leave him hanging at the first sign of trouble.
If only you weren't unsure of how you felt about him.
He calls you afterward, because he wants to, the last remaining shred of his resentment towards you be damned.
"Production nearly finished, darling?" He asks, the pretense of holding back from using the term of endearment long since abandoned.
"Mhmm, I've got one more week here in Atlanta, Mitchell."
You've gone back to calling him Mitchell - not baby, love, or anything remotely romantic.
It bothers him, but he's determined not to let it show.
"I've got about a week and a half here still."
"Then we've got season three prep in London, right?"
"Yeah," he mumbles. "I'll see you back there I suppose."
"Okay," you reply, sounding uncertain of what to say next. "Are you... is everything okay?"
"Yeah, yeah," he automatically says. "I just thought... maybe I can come see you."
He listens to your steady breathing at the other end, and it calms him. He waits in silence, until you respond with, "Aren't you busy out there, Ewan?"
He is, and he is aware that it makes him seem desperate. It has only been a few weeks since your last rendezvous back in London, and he is supposed to remain nonchalant. Unaffected. This is not supposed to be some kind of lifeline for him. The thought of you should not be what runs through his mind at every waking moment.
He contradicts all of that, when he admits, "I am, but I want to see you anyway. I can fly out for a day and we could - "
"Ewan - "
"I need you."
You sigh deeply, and he pictures the silhouette of your shoulders rising and falling, the pinch in between your brows, the concerned frown your lips take the shape of.
He misses you. Do you miss him too?
"I know," you say. "But I'll see you soon in London, okay?"
That was not the answer he wanted. There are times when you sound dispassionate and he feels like you couldn't give less of a shit about him, and it kills him.
Even though it shouldn't, and this is what he should have expected, after proposing the arrangement.
But there are also times when you give him a spark of hope to cling to.
"Besides," you muse, "we'll soon have to prepare to give the fans what they want. All the love for Aemond and Alyna surely will not be ignored by the writers. I know I'm rooting for them."
Ewan laughs, "I am too."
Aemond and Alyna. You and him. There are fans, and there are fans, and Ewan is proudly a member of the latter.
"Okay, so, I have to head back inside," you say. "I - uhhh - "
"Yeah, darling, I'll see you soon." I miss you.
"Hmm," you respond, stealing his signature line right from his lips.
He stays on the line, unwilling to let you go.
"Mitchell?" you ask.
"Yes, love?"
"I guess you missed me too much after all."
He smiles wistfully, "I guess I did."
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London
Production for your film wraps in early February, just in time for the initial preparations for the upcoming season of House of the Dragon.
You arrive back in London a week before the table read, just in time to join the rest of the cast for a mini reunion at Matt's apartment.
A few drinks in, with numerous tales regaled amongst the large group about what everyone has been up to for the past half year, and you realise just how much you missed being with the cast.
They truly are the best bunch of people you could have ever dreamed of working with.
You eventually found yourselves branching off into little groups, with some preparing food in the kitchen, others smoking out in the balcony, and the rest scattered in the expanse of the apartment.
Matt's place is well-decorated for a bachelor pad, with personal knick-knacks at every corner. You note this to him, as you sit on the plush carpet in his living room. Your little half-circle consists of yourself, Matt, Phia, Liv, Bethany, and Tom, all in varying degrees of inebriation, but either of the lads arguably take the cake.
"You see that?" Matt leans close, pointing to the green shelf nestled in the corner. "On the second level right there, is a prop I stole from season one."
"No way," you squint in that direction, unaware that he gives you a good once-over, the admiration in his eyes plain to see.
The others are quick to point it out in typical fashion.
"Now, now, Smithy," Tom quips. "Try not to burn holes in the girl with yer eyes there."
"She's my babe," Phia jokes, winking at you.
"Oh really?" Matt simply leans back on his palms, unaffected. "Not Ewan's?"
"Oop - " Liv's eyes widen like saucers. "Don't even go there, Smithy."
"Why ever not?" Matt shrugs.
"Guys," you shake your head, waving a hand in dismissal. "it's fine. It's... whatever."
"He's not here," Matt says. "We can talk about it."
"Gossip girl over here," Bethany smirks.
Matt was right in pointing out that Ewan is yet to arrive back from the States. Of course, Ewan had given you a call letting you know that he would be spending the night before the table read at your apartment.
But right now, in this moment, you didn't really feel like going through the sordid details of your affair.
"We can talk about it," you say, "but I'd rather not."
Matt laughs, "Okay. But are you or are you not together?"
"Matt," Tom groans, pinching the bridge of his nose in amusement at his mate's boldness.
"Hey, it's a simple question!"
"It is, isn't it?" you shrug, allowing him that, because he is speaking true. It is supposed to be simple. "We're not actually together... but some of you already know - " you shoot Tom and Phia pointed glances " - that we had a thing once, and we may have a thing still, only lesser and more casual." You look around the group, hoping they got the gist, and that no follow-up statements are necessary.
"Hey, I get it," Bethany replies. "It sounds complicated, but it's your business, sweetheart."
You hum gratefully. The others jump on another topic, but Matt slinks closer to you, with the on-brand glint in his eyes. He says, lowly, "That's good, then."
Your mouth parts in pleasant surprise, as you finally take notice of the way he looks at you. "Say that again, Smithy?"
"You heard me," he answers. Smooth. Matt has been known to be the resident casanova of the cast, with his undeniable charm on and off set. He can get along with absolutely anyone, and this includes the array of women who get pulled in by his charisma.
It's lost on you why he would now set his sights on you, but you can't deny that you enjoy the attention.
Fabien suddenly comes into view with that digital camera of his pointed towards your group. He snaps one of Tom whose raised bottle of beer half covers his smirking face. Then he turns to you and Matt, saying, "Give papa a smile, kids!"
Matt quickly slings an arm around you, making you lean against him. He coolly points to the camera, posing like he usually does. You smile widely, your brain in a pleasant daze from the alcohol, the banter, and the alluring scent of Matt's perfume.
"Send me a copy of that, Fabs," Matt comments after. Fabien will probably post the photo on his usual Instagram slideshow, but Matt happily stays off the socials.
"Gonna get it framed?" you joke, nudging him lightly with your shoulder.
"Oh, you bet," he winks at you, making you swallow nervously. Speaking to him now, in this way, you realise just how easily the Matt Smith is able to get with the ladies. Charm practically oozes off of him.
And Daemon was your original favourite, after all.
Fabien and Matt walk you and Phia back to your apartments in the wee hours of the morning. Though your neighbourhood was only 5 minutes away, the lads gallantly insisted that they wouldn't let you go without an escort.
Your group weaves its way through the empty streets of London, chatting and laughing away, the effects of the alcohol yet to wear off. At some point, Matt wraps an arm around you, and you let him keep it that way.
You have grown fond of him, having spent a lot of time with him during filming. And, well, you needed to keep your balance anyway.
Not to mention, he offers a pleasant distraction from having to yearn all the damn time for what you once had with Ewan.
Fabien and Phia walk ahead to her nearby apartment, so you're left with Matt in front of your building.
"We'll be spending a lot more time together this season, fortunately," he says.
"That's kind of a given," you laugh. "Alyna's never going to drop her oath to the Queen."
"And the King."
"Consort," you finish for him.
He laughs freely, shaking his head, before his expression turns a bit serious. He dips his face closer to yours, whispering, "And in real life? Is Alyna sticking with Aemond?"
That stumps you. Matt's blue eyes are indeed arresting, but one mention of Aemond is enough to bring you back into the Ewan Mitchell spiral.
But... you're not his.
You shrug in response, smiling softly, "I guess some things just aren't meant to be."
You become convinced that the universe must be testing you because your phone buzzes in that moment, revealing an incoming call from Ewan One-Eye.
Matt spots it easily, challenging you with, "So what then, beautiful? Are you going to answer the call?"
It buzzes once more, and another time, before you press decline.
Matt doesn't give you the time to regret your decision. He swoops down and plants a soft kiss at the corner of your lips. Nothing too much, but just enough to toe the line of simply being friendly.
"I - I better head inside - " you stammer, your face heating up.
"You better."
"I'll see you soon, Smithy."
He nods, "See you soon, my Alyna."
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Ewan can hardly focus on the script in front of him. He struggles to get his lines out efficiently during the table read, and he hopes that no one else notices.
It would be a miracle if you actually take notice of him, with Matt stealing your attention as he sits to your right.
The cast and crew are positioned around the room, and you just happened to be directly across Ewan, right in his line of sight. He would revel in it, but not now, with Matt leaning in once in a while and whispering something in your ear that makes you softly giggle.
How unprofessional. Whatever he is telling you, it sure must be fucking fascinating.
He isn't entirely oblivious of your growing closeness with Matt. He saw the photos of the two of you walking the streets of London, snug against each other, but he chose not to think much of it. After all, how many times has Matt been pictured with an arm wrapped around a costar? That is just how he is. Open and friendly.
Ewan had not been inclined to think it meant something more in your case.
"Ewan," he hears Tom sharply whisper to his left. "It's your line."
The room is silent in anticipation, eager to get on with the script. You lock eyes with him and offer an encouraging smile, and he is just about to reciprocate, but then he notices Matt's arm resting on the back of your seat.
Like he has laid a claim on you.
Ewan ends up grumbling out his lines, lacking the vulnerability that Aemond is meant to be displaying in that scene.
His keeps his expression stoic, trying to do his best to accomplish the task at hand. A tiny consolation is that the script to season three seems to be marginally better than that for the previous season.
There is not a single scene of Aemond and Alyna thus far, but the script is littered with those of Daemon and Alyna. Which makes complete sense, since they're fighting for the same cause, and Daemon has been somewhat of a mentor to the young Alyna.
Ewan liked their dynamic, being a fan of both the characters, and their real-life counterparts. But the scene that is playing out before him may be enough to sway his bias to the contrary.
Daemon and Alyna. You and Matt.
Ewan scoffs to himself, forgetting where he is for a moment. Tom side-eyes his weird behaviour, thinking, the lad must have left his marbles back in America.
Ewan doesn't notice. His thoughts race a mile a minute - Do the writers not see the potential goldmine they've got with the Aemond and Alyna dynamic? Do they not know how crazy it would drive the fanbase?
Is Matt unaware that it was his name - Ewan's, and no one else's - that you were screaming last night?
Your sputtered little pants of his name rise from his memory, your breathing ragged by the time he finished making love to you the third round in the same night.
That... that was his.
You are -
"Mate," Tom clasps him on the shoulder, "drink some water, yeah? You look bloody flushed."
Ewan hums gratefully, nodding once, shaking the image of you from his mind.
After all, he wears his Adidas joggers today, and the thin material would not be able to conceal it if he ended up having a raging hard-on, in front of everyone during the damn table read.
When another scene of Daemon and Alyna comes on, with you and Matt eagerly reciting your lines to each other, the boyish lust that Ewan entertained essentially dies.
He purses his lips, a ghost of a smile, ever the good and supportive costar.
He raises his head to distract himself by looking around the table, eventually locking eyes with Phia, who had already been looking at him strangely.
You okay? she mouths.
His head snaps toward the sound of your laughter before he could respond.
"Shoot, sorry," you smile, apparently having read the wrong line. Everyone at the table waves it off, a cacophony of 'it's alright' and 'you got this' heard around the room.
When you finish the rather long, drawn-out speech Alyna makes, there is an intermission before the next scene.
People begin turning to each other to make comments, some stand to stretch their legs. Then Ewan hears it - "How'd I do, Smithy?" followed by "Not too shabby, my Alyna."
His Alyna?
Ewan flips the bloody table over in his mind.
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Ewan calls you the following night, under the pretense of the arrangement.
In truth, he'd take anything. He could sit on your couch and watch paint dry, if it meant being around you.
"Not tonight, Ewan," you say, and his heart sinks.
"Why not?" he asks, uncaring about how downright needy he sounds.
"Uhhhm, I have a friend over," you reveal.
"Phia? I'm sure she'll understand."
"Oh, come on, Ewan. It's not Phia, and even if it was, I wouldn't just send her away."
"Who then?" he insists, but some part of him already knows the answer.
"Fabien," you say, "and Matt. But Fabien already left to go see Bella, so it's just - "
"You and Matt, huh," he spits bitterly. For an actor, he sure is unable to mask his emotions.
"What are you insinuating? We're friends. You're his friend too, Ewan."
"Hmm," his grip on his phone tightens, "you seem a lot closer than friends to me."
"You're being ridiculous," you scoff. "I would ask you to still come over if you want to hang out with us but not if you're being this unpleasant."
"Forget it," he practically snaps, immediately regretting his tone, "let me know when you're less occupied."
"Ewan - "
"It's okay, darling," he cuts you off, wanting to be done with the conversation already. "I'll come see you before the cast shoot." He refers to the Entertainment Weekly photoshoot the entire cast is slated to do in the coming week, the first offering of season three promo.
"Okay," you exhale, then say, "Sansa misses you."
That earns a weak smile out of him. If only her owner could say that she misses him too. "Does she?"
"Mhmm," you respond, and he hears the smile in your voice, "so... so you better come over soon or she might start clawing at the door."
Matt makes his presence known, his voice becoming audible as he walks into the room where you are, asking, "You alright, love?"
"Ewan, I gotta go," you say in a rush.
"Okay," he sighs in defeat. He drops his phone on the couch, then paces around his apartment, needing to get the picture of you and Matt canoodling out of his mind.
He audibly groans. Why must he torture himself so? If you say that you and Matt are just friends, then that must be the case.
My Alyna, Matt had called you.
In a sudden flash of madness or genius, Ewan picks up his phone and redownloads a certain wretched app.
It takes less than a minute, and soon he finds himself back in the mostly uncharted waters of Instagram. Careful not to accidentally like any post as he had before, he makes his way to the section that lets him create a new post.
Scrolling through his photo gallery, it doesn't take long before he finds one to his liking.
No editing is needed. He knows that the image and its subjects need no addition.
In his eyes, you are perfect as you are.
That night marks Ewan's second ever official post on his Instagram, yet again sending the entire fandom in a wild tailspin.
It's a picture of you sitting on top of your bed, hair slightly dishevelled, and with an old pyjama shirt on. Sansa is cradled on your bare thighs, and a smile graces your face as you pet her dotingly. The angle is from the side, where Ewan lay on his designated part of your bed, surreptitiously taking the picture.
The morning light cast a soft glow on your face, and the entire scene had made Ewan wish he never had to leave.
Under the post, reads the caption -
My Alyna.
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💌 next chapter
🎧 series mixtape
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Some notes in the margins...
In part 8 - the EW photoshoot, more season three prep, and big news regarding Ewan's upcoming film!
I'm taking all your amazing ideas into account, and you'll continue to see smatterings of them in this story.
As always, I can't wait to talk with yous in the comments! Which couple is your endgame? <3
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irndad · 2 months ago
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She favorites recipes on Instagram. 
It’s a little embarrassing how Carmen knows- that when she’s at his place watching him sketch dishes she can’t taste, he’s also paying attention to what’s on her phone. And it’s usually kistchy things- dresses and outfits with legwarmers, pop-culture breakdowns he doesn’t have time to understand, and yes, occassionally, recipes. 
Carmen adores her company. It’s a private truth, one that they boht know and yet he can’t admit under her gaze. She’s a friend of Richie’s which is endlessly fucking confusing. Both because of how incredible she is, and because it is truly insane to imagine Richie with friends. 
Carmen supposes they’re friends too, now. It doesn’t feel quite right, the way she scribbles notes for him in the mornings and has slept over quite often. She’s busy, has her own life and her own career and he’s lucky for the time he spends with her. He doesn’t really have time to date her the way he’d like to, with dinner dates and late night drives down Lake Shore, watching the sunrise over the lake on mornings where time feels like no object. 
He’s clearly given this some thought. 
Anyhow, it doesn’t matter now. Now, she’s slept over. He’s got a full-size, which felt like a good enough excuse to share the bed, even though every time they do he still ends wrapped around her like a vice, like roots of a tree, raveled in a way that seems inpenetrable. 
She’s sipping on an energy drink- he’s offered her the coffee that he’s imported, and prepared with care, but she’d obviously thought it was too bitter. And now he keeps energy drinks in the house when she stays over. She’s popped in one of her wired earbuds, and the light washes over her like a halo. She’s got a bonafide glow while she sits on his counter, scrolling through recipes. 
“That looks good,” he hears himself say, a little outside of himself, as she stops scrolling. It’s a pasta dish, and she’s favorited it. It looks more complex than it is, really, but he’s not sure he’s a good source.
“Hmm? Oh yeah, I had it once when I was in Paris. It was fucking insane, Carmen, it’s so good. I’m always looking for a place to get it. I don’t really think there’s a place in Chicago where you can get it, actually.”
“It was seasonal actually,” he says back, her eyes fixed to his now, “Ever used to make it every fall. Easier to source the pine nuts.”
She looks so, so fond of him that Carmen could entertain the idea of leaning over the counter and kissing her. It’s incredibly tempting, the hint of a smile playing at the corners of her mouth, endeared by his knowledge. He feels guilty, how he plays with the pencil, knowing she’s stared appreciatively at his hands. He enjoys being pretty to her, leaning into the fantasy that he could be more than her weird fuck-up friend of a friend that’s too chicken-shit to ask her out. How odd is it, that he knows what it’s like to wake up to the smell of her shampoo, but has no idea how she likes to be kissed?
He’s so bad at this he’s failed before he’s even started. 
He can cook, though. 
Cooking is methodical, and so he does it. it’s an easy love language, for him. he dices the parsely and the other fresh herbs, sautes them wirh precision, uses some of the nice butter from work- it’s a marvel, at the end of it, fragrant and warm, waiting for her arrival. 
When she does make her arrival, just on time for him, he plates the dish before she comes in. 
“Oooh,” she preens, raking her eyes up and down him. He feels perciebed, but in a way that he’d like to be. Look at me, he thinks. What a pleasure to be seen by her. “Is this all for me?”
“Yeah, yeah,” he stammers out, “Thought I’d thank you for all your help. Late nights you’ve been staying up with me, talking through the menu and all- thought I could make you something.”
When she tastes it, it’s careful and adoring, and he’s good at this. 
“Yes chef,” she says teasingly, “Oh my god, Carmen, this is so sweet. You didn’t have to do that. I like being here.”
He wants to kiss her again, doesn’t know why he’s not letting himself. She meets him halfway, though, kissing the corner of his mouth that only a fool would imply has plausible platonic deniability.  
“Thanks, Carm.”
“Anytime.”
He’ll kiss her properly next time.
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snowball-doie · 2 months ago
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| pairing: gn!Reader x switch!Mark
| warnings: 18+ MDNI. Under the desk blowjob. Edging. Overstimulation. Oblivious.... oblivious Mark..... He's more on the subby side for this one.
| wc: 3k
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“How does London sound?”
You looked up from your laptop to raise a brow at your boyfriend who was sitting on the couch with you, your legs swung over his thighs while he slowly massaged your feet as he got lost in thought. That was what he spent the last hour thinking about? Really? He knew better than to ask you to go with him on trips, work or not.
When you and Mark started dating, a clear rule had been struck which stated that you could never, ever get caught dating— Not because he worried about his career, who gave a fuck about that? Mark was consumed with anxiety about you being attacked and harassed by cruel fans who felt they could say or do whatever they wanted behind the safety of their phone screens… Or worse, they would confront you in person and threaten your safety. He tried not to imagine the worst, but the possibilities seemed to be endless, and he wanted to protect you first and foremost, so the most important thing was being as careful as possible; That usually meant no public outings. You two lived together, you slept together, you ate together, but you would never be seen together.
However, the past few months had taken a turn for Mark. He disliked being away from you due to tours and comebacks, so his clinginess had grown twofold, leading to some instances which you found to be tiptoeing the line between breaking your number one rule and just Mark being a good boyfriend. You tried not to care about it too much. You were both adults making adult decisions, and you knew how to play it safely… But that didn’t stop you from wondering why the Hell Mark of all people was willing to play with fire like that. Now he was throwing out the idea of London? That was supposed to be his sponsored trip for Wimbledon. You weren’t invited. You didn’t have a plane ticket. His hotel room was only reserved for one person in a king sized suite, thanks to his sponsors. There was no room for you, and the odds of getting caught were too high.
“Can’t,” you replied.
Mark rubbed his thumbs into the arch of your left foot. “It’d be fun. We can fly first class together, stay in a nice hotel, tour the city… I don’t think I could get you into the game, but… There’s plenty of other things for us to do together.”
“Can’t.”
He tsked his tongue with frustration. “Why?”
“Too risky.”
“Not if we put the flight in your name, get you your own room in the hotel so no one would think we’re sharing a bed…” He hit a sore spot, causing you to stop typing on your laptop and put your full attention on him. “I’ll put on hats and masks while we’re walking around—”
“We can’t.”
Mark sighed. “Come on. Just once. I promise, we’ll be super, super, super careful. And if you ever get too worried, we can bail. Just say the word and we’ll go back to the hotel, no questions asked. We can stay in all day, watch movies, order room service, fuck a ton—”
You kicked his thigh gently.
“Ow!”
But with a little more persuasion and a few solidified plans about how you two would pull off your incognito trip to London, you were convinced to go with him at the last second. Mark paid for everything. Your first class flight— Somehow there was still a seat available next to him, so he snatched it up immediately, despite the insane price gouging because of how soon the flight was; Your hotel room, a small one since you wouldn’t be spending time in it anyhow, it was just for appearances; And he made sure that all other expenses were attached to his card. He truly wasn’t wasting any time locking you into the trip. He wanted you there no matter what. Stupid or not, he wanted you there so badly… If it were at all possible, maybe in some alternate universe, Mark would’ve had you at his side throughout the entire trip, no masks or hats, no more hiding from the world. But alas… that wasn’t your reality.
You and Mark had to arrive at the airport separately. The paparazzi and fans were waiting for him because he was flying for a schedule which meant that it was public information, unfortunately; But you managed to walk through check-in and security smoothly without any issues. Boarding the flight, you were able to stand next to each other, but you couldn’t be caught talking to each other. That didn’t stop Mark. At one point, as the line was moving towards the flight attendant who was scanning tickets, Mark’s pinky drifted against yours, letting you know that he was there and that he so badly wanted to hold your hand. On the flight. That was the look you gave him, a promise that he could hold your hand for the entirety of the trip once everyone was seated and no one was looking. And that was exactly what happened.
Mark fell asleep on the plane, his hand clasped with yours under his blanket. He was in the middle of rewatching one of the Spider-Man movies when his head slumped to the side, his mouth fell agape, and he started quietly snoring under the noise of the jet engines that kept the plane moving in the air. He looked really cute. You’d never flown with him before, and you never really imagined that you would, so seeing the way he so comfortably fit into his spot in first class and accepted all the amenities and even fell asleep so quickly was baffling to you— But his fogged up glasses, and his brown curls falling in his face nearly took you out. You figured out about two hours into the flight that it was cuteness aggression which nearly had you cuddling him, if it weren’t for the fact that anyone could have spotted you two at any moment.
Mark organized having a driver pick you up at baggage claim because fans were waiting for him there too so he couldn’t go with you. You were pampered completely by the driver offering to take your bag, dragging it behind him as he led you to the nice SUV which had water and snacks waiting for you, and he even offered to let you control the music if you wanted— You were too shy to entertain the thought. When you arrived at the hotel, the driver helped hand your bag over to the bell boys who opened your door and guided you to the front desk where you found Mark already checking into his room as well. He grinned over at you while you both stood at the desk. The lady across from him was trying to ask him questions, but he was so locked into staring at you out of the corner of his eye that he couldn’t focus on the topic at hand. You, however, made your check in brief because your bag was delivered to your room despite the fact that you needed to covertly transport it to Mark’s room. Idiot was already there by the time you arrived. Life of a celebrity… Even though he procrastinated, he still managed to beat you everywhere.
“You like it?” he asked, looking around the suite before falling onto the bed.
You also looked around a bit. It was a big place with a living room, a big TV, a small kitchen, the large king bed, and a huge bathroom that you couldn’t imagine why it was like that. “It’s nice.”
Mark smirked. “You tired? Hungry?”
“Both.”
“Room service?”
You nodded.
Over the next few days, Mark was so busy with work that he was up early in the morning in order to let the makeup, hair, and clothing stylists in so that they could doll him up for the day, then he wouldn’t be back until late in the evening when everyone would return with him in order to take back all their work. It gave you plenty of time to explore on your own, but you wished that it were with him, like a normal couple. You knew what you signed up for. You weren’t stupid. But that was exactly why you declined the trip in the first place because you expected that being alone and missing him would suck. Yeah, the city was pretty in certain places, and it was kind of funny seeing fangirls running around with their Mark Lee photocards on their bags while they ran to go find him at his next public schedule. He even thought it was funny when you told him about your day when you two would be cuddled in bed together, catching up on what the other missed out on. He had a lot more going on than you did, but that was a given.
After the last day of his sponsored trip, Mark was finally free. Like he promised, he took you wherever you wanted, despite the many layers of clothes he had to wear in the heat just so he could go unrecognized, and you felt too uncomfortable to hold hands while walking around. Mark noticed. He was always observant about those kinds of things, so he didn’t want to push you, especially when he was slightly worried too about the amount of fangirls that were still roaming around the city in the hopes of “accidentally” running into their favorite idol.
In the evenings, you and Mark returned to the hotel to relax. Sometimes you would go out for dinner, most times not because someone could snap a picture of you two at dinner and have it in the tabloids ten minutes later with a headline about how the lead rapper of NCT was on a dinner date in London. That was a shit storm neither of you wanted to handle. And it wasn’t like staying in was a bad thing! You still got to see the city as much as you wanted to, and you finally got to spend time with Mark in London, so what was there to complain about?
Work.
There was always work. Being at the hotel meant that Mark got caught up in making music at his laptop for hours on end without realizing how much time was passing. For the most part you didn’t mind because he began around the time you were getting in bed, and you always woke up in his arms regardless, so it wasn’t that big of a deal. But there was one night you were annoyed. Before your room service dinners arrived, Mark was sitting at the desk in his pajamas, headphones on, music blasting while he worked on creating a new mix for his solo projects that he enjoyed messing with— You were pretty sure that he and Johnny were writing another song together too, so his focus was tunnel visioned on work, work, work and not his partner whom he’d dragged to Europe with him after begging like a pathetic puppy for so long. Was he stupid? Yuta probably would have smacked him upside the back of the head if you told him what Mark was doing. “Idiot, there’s a hot person in the bed behind you. Do something about it!” But Yuta would have to smack some sense into your boyfriend later… In the meantime, you had to make due with fighting to put his attention back on you.
“Baby,” you cooed from the bed.
He didn’t budge. Instead, he clicked a few things, opened another Chrome tab, Googled something, then went back to his mix.
“Mark.”
Still nothing.
You tsked your tongue and crawled off the bed. Mark was so lost in his own world that he didn’t even notice that you were only wearing blue underwear just for him; and he didn’t even budge when you dropped to your knees beside him. You rolled your eyes. There was no way his tunnel vision was that bad… Sure, he moved a bit to accommodate you as you skillfully made your way under the desk and settled in between his man-spread legs, but come on, really? He still didn’t take off his headset? What the Hell did he think you were doing down there, counting specs of dust? Sometimes he really could be oblivious.
When you started fiddling with his pajama pants, Mark hesitated, leaning back slightly so that he could glance down at you through his glasses with a raised brow. You hesitated. With a doe-eyed look, you acted like you weren’t doing anything at all, because he seemingly didn’t want to pay much attention to you in the first place, even though it was his idea to drag you to London. Mark warily went back to his work. Once his focus was elsewhere again, you continued to tease him. He let out a quiet gasp when you ran the palm of your hand over the crotch of his pants, feeling up his length that jumped with excitement. You grinned. Still, he eyed you suspiciously while slowly clicking things with his mouse and readjusting tunes with the mixer to his left. Then the tips of your fingers danced over his sensitive tip. His breath hitched, his eyes squeezed shut, and he adjusted slightly in his seat so that it would be easier for you to touch more of him. You didn’t enlighten him. Not yet. You just stared up at him with a grin, admiring how handsome he was, and how the blush on his cheeks was growing along with the erection in his pants.
To test the waters, you ran your hand along his cock again, content that he found you so alluring that he could get as hard as he was within a teasing touch or two. Surely he’d put his attention on you finally if you just… reached into his pajamas and pulled out his cock. Mark let out another quiet moan. But what really did it was when you held him upright as he was still getting harder, and you wrapped your lips around him, sinking down about half way.
“Oh— Fuck, baby—” His hands abandoned his music set up to tangle his fingers in your hair so that he could keep you on his cock. However, you pulled away with surprisingly not much protest from Mark who whimpered when your lips left him, and instead your thumb slowly played with his tip. “Baby, please…”
“Keep working.”
“What?”
You shrugged. “You’ve got a lot of work to do, right? You should keep working, or else Johnny’ll get mad when we go back home.”
“He won’t care—” He bucked his hips up in an attempt to get you to suck him off again.
“Oh? So it could’ve waited?”
“I—” He dawned on him that he’d gotten himself caught in your trap. “I’m sorry, baby, I didn’t even realize.” His head fell backwards when you suddenly licked the length of his dick from base to tip so slowly that you felt him pulse in your hand. “I’m so, so sorry, baby, please…” His hands unwittingly guided your mouth back onto him. Mark groaned loudly. “Just like that.”
He looked so cute with his headset slowly falling off his head, his glasses pushed all the way up the bridge of his nose thanks to gravity, and your name was being chanted like a prayer while it mixed with his moans and pleas for you to keep going. You couldn’t stay mad at that. Seeing him fall apart for you made you happier than anything else in the whole world.
“Use your tongue— Y-Yeah— Just… just like that… Don’t stop…”
You did as he wanted, patterning your movements between bobbing your head, swirling his tip with your tongue, and using your hands to play with his balls and the base of his cock. He whimpered pathetically. It seemed that you were getting to him, faster than you expected. The way Mark swiveled his hips desperately in his chair, and he finally knocked the headset off the top of his head and onto his neck, you could tell that he was already close to cumming.
You pulled away again, using that moment to catch your breath while Mark popped upright to look down at you with pouty eyes, wondering how you could possibly do such a thing when he was so close… Poor thing. Still, it was just as much fun to torment him as it was to see him falling apart thanks to you. When his breath was steady again, you went back to sucking him off slowly— Really slow in the hopes of working him up without getting him too close to the edge yet. It worked. Mark’s feet anxiously kicked against the floor. He groaned and grabbed onto the arms of his desk chair as tightly as he could to keep himself from grabbing you or fucking your face because he knew that would deter you from giving him what he desperately needed.
“Come on, baby,” he egged you on needily, “you look so good with my cock in your mouth… Wanna cum in your mouth… Wanna watch you swallow every drop.” He sucked in a deep breath to relax his body, recollecting himself. When he was calm, he put his fingers back in your hair and pushed you down onto his cock, letting you feel the way his tip hit the back of your throat, both of you moaning in unison. “Fuck, yes!” 
For about a minute, Mark fucked your mouth, thinking that he had all the control in the world, but once again, when he got close, you squirmed your way out of his grasp and sat back to look up at him from under the desk. He pouted down at you. Okay, okay, fine, just one more… It was fun edging him, but you couldn’t bear that sad look on his face.
You tangled your fingers with his so that he had something else to hold onto when you returned to sucking him off with hollow cheeks and your tongue swirling around. Mark’s grip tightened against yours. He boiled himself down to pants and pathetic little whimpers rather than begging you, probably theorizing that it was his neediness that convinced you to keep edging him for fun. However, you wanted to drag those cute reactions out of him to make him earn the orgasm you’d already decided on giving him; So you made sure to put enough attention on his sensitive tip until he had no other choice than to start moaning your name again, coupled with quiet, “Please, please, please, please, please, please…” that indicated his brain had broken so soon and so easily.
With another doe-eyed look up at him, you silently told him that it was okay to finally cum. Mark tensed in his chair in preparation. His thighs squeezed around your head, his feet kept anxiously tapping the carpet, and his hips wiggled desperately in his seat while you bobbed your head faster up and down his length.
“I’m cumming—” He moaned out so breathlessly you almost missed it. “I’m- I’m— Fuck—” With his hips hovering in the air, he finally snapped.
He came hard, his legs shivering, his hands tugging against yours, his cum spilling down your throat. You pressed his hips down onto the chair so that he could relax while you helped him ride out his orgasm. Mark hunched forward when “helping” turned into overstimulating.
“Ah, shit, baby, wait, wait, fuck—”
Finally, you gave him reprieve by slowly dragging your lips off his cock with a pop. Mark released your hands while his body completely slumped with relief, and he reached out to run his thumb over your bottom lip, collecting the little bit of drool mixed with cum that you hadn’t realized was there, then he slowly pushed his finger into your mouth. Take every drop…
“That’s it,” he cooed at you tiredly.
After you finished sucking his thumb clean, Mark rolled his desk chair back in order to give him room to readjust his pants momentarily before reaching out to help you off the ground.
“Come here.”
He welcomed you so easily into his arms and onto his lap. He hugged you close, kissing your lips desperately despite the fact that you tasted like his cum— Or perhaps because of that.
“I’m sorry I got lost in my work.” He pecked your cheek. “Let me make it up to you.”
“Better make it good,” you replied teasingly.
Mark chuckled. “Oh, I will.”
Carefully, he lifted you off his lap and navigated you towards the bed. There was a little more than twenty four hours until your flight home… Yeah, there’d be plenty of time for him to make it up to you and keep his full attention on you in the meantime.
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heechwe · 9 days ago
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the start of time | 𝐩𝐣𝐬
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୨୧ pairing: park (jay) jongseong x reader ୨୧ word count: 8.6k ୨୧ genre: angst, semi-fluff, smut ୨୧ tags: friends to strangers to lovers, childhood friends, miscommunication, pet names (baby, love, etc.), unprotected sex, TRIGGERS FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND PARENTAL ABUSE IN THE LATTER HALF OF FIC. ୨୧ synopsis: You've lost your creative spark for the first time since moving away from Jeju Island, leaving behind your best friend in the process without an explanation. But when a work assignment sends you back to your hometown, truths come to light and perhaps lost love can come back with a little time and effort. ➸ bless @pars-ley for following this fic to the very beginning and being one of the best betas ever! this story is for you, ley, and thank you ♡ 💿Listen to the story's playlist here!
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Over the thin railing that separates Jay from the cliffs below, the waves crash violently together. The weather mirrors the feelings circulating through his veins. The ripples of the seabed meeting the sand make him long for what his life could be instead of its current state. The wind whips his trenchcoat in angry thrashes against his back. His hands grip the lighthouse’s iron bars to keep his body steady. The upcoming storm was forecast last night to be one of the biggest downpours of the summer.
As the second in command of the lighthouse keeper, his father, it’s standard practice to be prepared for what’s to come. As the sea continues its visceral reaction to the weather, Jay thinks about her and what her life has become since she’s left. Is she happy? Is Seoul everything she dreamed of? Was running from Jeju without saying goodbye worth it? Or is she closer than he believes, her heart’s desire turning out to be not far from the fishing town they grew up in?
His father calls for him inside, interrupting his spiraling thoughts. Probably for the better, anyway. Thinking about those chapters of his life, the book separated cleanly and harshly with a before and after, does him no good. So, like he should, he runs inside to do the next task that keeps one of the last lighthouses in Jeju working properly. Even if his heart has to be sacrificed in the process.
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The subject of your next photograph takes no interest in the lens standing three feet away. Her tail wiggles rapidly as she inspects the bush in front of her with her perky, wet nose. You giggle quietly behind your camera, trying not to disturb her inspection of the roses.
Rule #1 of photography, according to your department head Sunghoon, is to make yourself nonexistent. To get the perfect shot, conceal yourself as much as possible. It’s taken many practice sessions since your first magazine catalog, the original photos coming out less than perfect. Thankfully, you’re now lead photographer thanks to Sunghoon’s tutelage and tips. After five years, you feel like you’re on stable ground.
It reminds you of Jay, the sudden memory of him being the focus of your lens many times before a punch to the gut. Your oldest friend in the world probably wonders what the reason was for your sudden departure. You couldn’t even leave him a letter to provide some semblance of an explanation, one that he definitely deserved more than anyone else.
If only you had a reason that made sense or could salvage the bond you once shared. You know now it’s been eaten away by silence, so what could be said anyhow to repair it? 
Your guilt gnaws at your empty stomach the entire way back to the headquarters of Otherworldly, the magazine you interned at and subsequently were hired to take pictures for. You greet the rest of your team when you make your way upstairs.
”Finally found some inspiration?” Sunwoo asks. Your friend tries to balance a pencil on the top of his nose.
”I’m working on it. In the meantime, I got the copies you wanted.” You give him the folder that holds your pictures for the month’s spread.
”Barely made the deadline this time, kid.” Sunghoon tuts his head at you.
“Leave her be,” Chaewon chides him, thwacking her notebook on the back of his head. It’s nice to know the writer’s room has your back when the boys decide to tease, especially in the form of Chaewon. She may be a stern leader, but she also happens to have a soft spot for you, the only female photographer.
You hear your boss, Kim Taehyung, call your name and ask you to come to his office. Your body bristles at the command, but Chaewon pats you on the shoulder. “Probably just a timesheet thing.”
Tip-toeing into Taehyung’s office, you smile at his back. Your boss is focused on a box of files on the windowsill, the outline of his button up shirt highlighted by the sun. “Please sit,” he says.
You do as he asks, putting your hands on your knees to pinch the skin, an old habit you couldn't kick. You tuck your hands under your legs to stop when Taehyung turns to you. He presses his glasses higher to the bridge of his nose, a soft smile emerging on his lips. “I wanted to say your photos from the last column were very impressive.”
”Oh!” You respond instinctively. Expecting reprimands that turned out to be compliments, you mentally take a deep breath of relief. “Thank you, sir.”
"Also," he says, "I was wondering how you’d feel being sent out on an assignment. Well, you and Sunwoo, actually. Sunghoon was discussing a location-focused piece, and he recommended you for it since you may need a change of scenery for some fresh inspiration.”
You nod your head immediately. “Of course!”
Taehyung claps his hands together, clearly pleased. “Perfect. I’ve already booked you two for the next flight to Aewol in two days. It’ll probably be easy to find a place to stay, right?”
The pit in your stomach that faded immediately widens into a chasm. The sound of your hometown’s name on Taehyung’s lips could have been a figment of your imagination. A sick joke your guilt materialized to punish you further. But as you look longer at your boss, his glee transforming into hesitant confusion, you know the reality is far worse.
”The location piece is for Jeju,” you say, the realization on your lips hitting your ears like a cannon.
”Is that an issue? I can always send Jungwon with Sunwoo instead."
”No sir! Not a problem at all.” The words tumble out before you can stop them.
Jungwon, the little prick, wouldn’t get in the way of your success if you could help it. It’s bad enough that he reminds you of your creative block whenever he gets the chance. No way would he steal a cover piece from you. Particularly the one Sunghoon recommended you for and your boss expected you to complete without problems.
Despite the implications creating intense dread in every fiber of your being.
”Perfect. Get some sleep for the flight! I’ll send the piece details in an email first thing tomorrow morning.”
You walk back to your desk in a daze, unsure what to say when Sunghoon, Sunwoo, and Chaewon ask about the meeting. All your thoughts can center on is Jay, his smiling face continuously playing in your mind’s eye.
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“This town is cute! A bit barren, but cute,” Sunwoo says as he exits the car parked in front of your childhood home. Your mother’s rose bushes stand tall near the mailbox, the only color in the dry grasslands surrounding your house. Aewol pales in comparison to the colors of Seoul, the city’s vibrant hues suddenly replaced with sepia tones. The only color that seems to shine through the landscape is the sea a five-minute walk away.
”Say that again, Woo, and your face won’t look so cute.” You roll your eyes and grab your luggage from the trunk.
Two weeks, only two weeks, you can survive two weeks. Your mantra on the flight to Jeju Island has been giving you some relief at the thought of going back home in half a decade. Standing in front of the brick and mortar that encapsulates your old house, you find the words to be extremely hollow.
With her uncanny senses, your mother is already out the door and greeting you and Sunwoo with hugs and kisses on the cheeks. How she could tell the two of you were barely out of the car without spying out the window, you’re unsure.
Sunwoo melts under your mother’s attention, his gummy smile and polite aura on full display. “Nice to meet you, ma’am.”
”Ah, my prayers were answered. Glad to see my daughter returned with a boyfriend!”
Yours and Sunwoo’s eyes grow to saucers. Your tongues are erupting with explanations at an absurdly fast speed. “No, Mom,” you shush her as Sunwoo’s blush creeps across his neck. “Woo’s my coworker. He’s here with me on an assignment.”
”Oh! Apologies.” She laughs behind one hand and pats Sunwoo on the back with the other. “Doesn’t mean one day you can’t be more than coworkers! That’s how your father and I met, remember?”
You give her a close-lipped smile and nod, the muscles in your jaw tightening.
You hadn’t thought about your father or your parents’ relationship once since you had flown out to the mainland. Admittedly, your life was all the better for it.
Feeling the air of his presence surrounding yours again twists the veins in your neck to tense knots. The ends of your hair prickle in anticipation. You make it to the front of your doorstep, wondering where he is and why he didn’t barge outside to greet you.
Like she can read your mind, your mother says, “I forgot to call and tell you, honey. Your father had an accident at the factory a month ago.” You see a tear in the corner of her eye, but you don’t address it. “So…he’s been bedridden for the past few months now.”
Sunwoo expresses his deepest sympathies. Unbeknownst to him, they deserve to go to the next beggar before him.
Like any other child, you should worry about your father’s sudden health change with a heavy heart and a frazzled mind. You should feel guilty for being away for so long, wondering how to make up for the lost time.
But you feel nothing. Not an ounce of what you should feel.
Even when you sit by your parents’ bed, his eyes lazily gazing out the window while your mother tells him in a loving voice that you’re home, your emotions are devoid of anything negative or positive. Sunwoo smiles and greets him politely. Your father says nothing. The seizure that overtook him stole his ability to enunciate coherent words.
Some moments later, when it’s just the two of you in the room together, you itch to leave. It should be a pleasure to see him. But you’re unsure to see it any other way but objectively: he’s just a body in a bed, doing nothing every day.
You hear your mother shouting in the living room. Her voice is at an abnormally high pitch to exemplify her happiness. You forgot she could achieve such a decibel when she wanted to.
”You won’t believe who’s here, Seongie!”
Seongie.
The childhood nickname Jay was blessed with by his parents, and the name stuck like a second skin. Now, it bounces off your ears and exacerbates your already conflicting emotions. Your body goes into overdrive from the sudden overstimulation, at ease from knowing Jay is close by but petrified you're seeing him after so long.
You fix your hair and take tentative steps out of your parents' room and into the hallway, hearing your mother call your name to beckon you to welcome your old friend.
When you see him, his frame filling the doorway of your childhood house, you’re transported back in time. You see yourself and Jay on a day when he could barely stand at half the wall height. You were etching pencil markings into the doorframe, the wood concealing the handwriting perfectly when the door was fully closed. A time when there were no worries or anxieties placed on you, the two of you against the world.
Looking over his face now, you realize the years have not shown physically. He still has the same angled jaw and smooth cheeks. His bottom lip remains puffy, especially when he pouts. The only thing that has changed with time is his eyes, most likely from the image before him, one he hasn’t seen in so long.
He has every right to be confused. One second, you stopped being a staple in his life. Now, you’re back in it without a warning.
You can’t deny your heart clenching. The muscle seizes when he looks over your figure, his jaw ticking when he finally meets your eyes with his own.
”You’re back,” he says finally. His first words to you in five years hold an air of uncertainty, laced with unspoken pain. He’s unsure what to do with his body, his arms pressed to his sides and his hands stuffed tightly into his pockets.
Knowing you’re the cause of it makes you want to run to Seoul all over again with your tail between your legs, hoping you can forget the misery you’ve caused. How can one apology hold enough weight to make up for what you did to one of the only people you’ve ever loved?
Sunwoo, aware of the sudden tension flooding the room, holds out a hand to your best friend. “Hi, I’m Sunwoo.”
Jay breaks eye contact with you to take Sunwoo’s palm, shaking it with a gentle but present grip. Jay gestures to your mom when he discusses yours and Sunwoo’s job at the magazine. “She’s very proud of her daughter, you know."
”Of course!” Your mother exclaims. “‘S not everyday that your child becomes some hip photographer.”
Jay inhales a heavy breath and looks down at his watch. “I have to go back to the lighthouse, but—“
”I thought your dad still ran that thing,” you cut Jay off. Aewol’s lighthouse was one of the last on the island, and the last love Jay’s father had left after his wife passed away twelve years ago. You expected it to stay in the family, but not in this way. Not when Jay has so many dreams to fulfill. Or, at least, you hope so.
Jay releases a humorless laugh, eyes falling at the corners. “Pop’s getting old. Can’t do it forever.”
He hugs your mother and gives a soft wave to Sunwoo. You feel the pit in your chest from a few days ago re-erupt when Jay looks in your direction before he departs. All you’re left with is the grim line of his mouth to haunt you for the rest of your afternoon.
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The shutter of your camera makes Jay turn his head to you with a shy grin, his hair blowing in all directions from the wind. Your spot on the cliffside overlooking the sea is close enough to the lighthouse for you to see Jay’s father going in and out of the structure with supplies shipped from the mainland. Jay only runs over when his father calls for him to help, but his father hasn’t bothered to in the last hour or so.
In the downtime, the two of you have been alternating between science homework and enjoying the cool, cloudy weather. You’ve taken a number of shots of the water’s current and weeds surrounding your picnic blanket, but the majority of them were of your best friend. He pretends he’s going to smack your lens away, but he never does.
“Are you done taking candid shots of me?” Jay asks, his pencil scratching against his notebook.
“Depends. Maybe once you tell me what you’re writing,” you tease. “Because it’s definitely not a chemical equation.”
Jay chuckles and puts his notebook between the two of you. The words are jumbled in front of you until you recognize them as a recipe. “I was testing out this version of hoedeopbap last night, but I used white fish instead of salmon. It turned out really good, even Jaeyun liked it.”
You rest your head on your hand, sprawling out on the blanket to look at Jay. He always appears so animated when discussing food. You wonder when he’ll take the initiative and do something with his passion.
“What?” He asks when he catches you staring.
You grin and turn your eyes away. “You’re just a dork for food, is all.”
“Says the nerd with her camera always around her neck.”
You click your tongue at him. “I consider myself an opportunist. How else will I get good shots if I don’t have my baby with me?” You rub your camera’s body lovingly, and Jay releases a hearty laugh.
The booming sound of your father’s voice calling your name makes your entire body flinch. You swear his figure is as tall as the lighthouse as he comes towards your picnic blanket, stopping short when he sees Jay next to you.
“It’s almost dinner time. Let’s go home.” Your father says the words with a false ease; they hide his warning to follow him back to your house. Your anxiety rumbles low in your stomach, but you play it off like it’s nothing as you pack up your stuff.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Jay says, his eyes hopeful for the next morning. As it is your routine for him to bike with you to school, you’re also counting the minutes until you see him again.
“See you tomorrow,” you say, your eyes soft but your stomach wrapped in knots. When you’re out of sight, and your father wraps his hand around your upper arm on your way to the car, you calculate the next seconds until you’re away from him and back in the safety of your best friend’s presence.
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You and Sunwoo have been around the town square of Aewol all morning and afternoon. The crisp hour of 4 PM hits you sharply with the sound of cows and other livestock sounding off somewhere nearby. The pictures you’ve both taken of the local townspeople, random animals passing through the pale greenery, and subtle landscape have been average at best. They don’t hit you with awe or fuel any further inspiration. It’s the same cycle you’ve repeated for the past three months, trying to strike some sort of match of creativity only to come up empty.
“Let’s be honest,” Sunwoo says, looking over his own camera’s reel. “These kinda blow.”
“You don’t say?” You kick a free cobblestone off the road in front of you, lips downturned.
“The assignment is ‘Hidden Treasures’ right? Maybe we’re just looking in the wrong place.”
“Where do you think we’ll find something like that here?”
“You’re a local,” Sunwoo says in his defense. “Where did you go all the time in this backwater town?”
The beginning of your sarcastic remark dies on your lips the second you see Jay walking out of the laundromat with Heeseung, one of your old high school friends. He looks the same as Jay, still youthful but showing maturity around the edges.
Jay catches your eyes as they continue walking, his face contorting in surprise but unsure how to address it. Heeseung is the one to run towards you and pick you up in a tight hug, practically squeezing the remaining energy out of you.
“Holy shit, Jong wasn’t lying! You’re really back!” Heeseung laughs, his eyes becoming crescent moons from his happiness. You match his reaction, genuinely glad to see another familiar face.
You introduce Sunwoo to Heeseung, and Sunwoo exchanges pleasantries with Jay. Jay remains tense, the two of you conflicted about how to bridge the awkwardness that lingers.
Heeseung, like Sunwoo, is a great detective, sniffing out tension and immediately directing the conversation to your cameras. “So, Jong was saying you’re here for an assignment?”
“Yes!” Sunwoo says before you can. “We’re trying to find hidden treasures, actually. Our boss’s words, not mine.” Heeseung laughs at Sunwoo and then flicks his fingers.
“Jong could show you guys the inside of the lighthouse! Or even the view from that damn balcony would be a treasure in its own right. You can practically see the whole town from up there. Right, Jong?”
Jay rolls his eyes and rolls the cuffs of his sleeves up to his elbows. “Yeah, that would be fine.”
“Perfect! We were dying here without any good material. No offense to you small town folk,” Sunwoo apologizes, but neither of your old friends mind. They welcome Sunwoo’s city perspective with laughter and an open hand, just like they always have with newcomers.
On your walk to the lighthouse, Heeseung and Sunwoo taking the lead, you’re left to walk alongside Jay. The tension is a tad looser than it was before, but it still pervades the space between you both.
Finally, Jay says, “I can’t believe you’re actually home, y’know.” He says the sentence more like a question, his voice unable to mask the traces of hurt that linger.
It makes your heart rip, but you avoid the workings inside your chest to keep the conversation light. "It took a long time, didn't it?”
”Yeah. It’s like you dropped off the planet.” Jay’s voice turns a degree lighter. He smiles, the crack in his solid facade giving you a way back in.
“I basically did. All I had was my camera and some clothes in my bag.”
Jay's eyes widen, startled by the thought. “You’ve never traveled light once in your entire life.”
”I know! I barely had time to grab the necessities.”
His eyes are filled with humor. “And by that, you mean…”
“Obviously my Pokémon collection, for starters. I had to start from scratch,” you joke. “Good thing I saved all of the old cards under my bed.”
”Even the one of Charmander that I dropped in Jaeyun’s homemade soju?”
You nod, laughing. “It still smells like watermelon.”
”Bullshit!”
You both fall into an easy rhythm of witty banter and taunting, recalling old memories and brushing shoulders in a mocking fashion.
By the time you’re taking photographs on the highest floor of the lighthouse, the tension has dissipated by a large portion. Your relationship with Jay may not be completely back to where it was before, but the first lighthearted smile he throws in your direction proves it’s a start.
And a start is just enough to make your heart feel a million pounds lighter.
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“So Jongseong is flailing this card around, not realizing that the bowl of my signature soju punch is right there behind him…” Jake tells the story of the Charmander card with animated expressions. Heeseung and Jay roll their eyes, but Sunwoo laughs the entire time, his buzz bumping his energy to a level you had never seen before.
The bonfire Jake and Heeseung set up a walk away from the lighthouse is big enough for all five of you to sit comfortably around it. It seemed to be the only way your old friends could hang out together at this point in their adult lives. The bar that still stood in town filled with too many old people to feel like an acceptable hangout location.
“And he completely dropped not only her precious Pokémon card, but his whole fist into the punch bowl! I had to make a whole new batch without my parents knowing about it!” Jake laughs incredulously.
The memory still holds a level of insanity for him, clearly—not just at the situation but the level of teasing that you and Jay would devolve to when you were in your own little world together. You couldn’t help that you wanted to take your card from Jay’s hands, even if that meant soaking him in alcohol to get him to give it up.
You lift your beer to your lips, blushing. Jay sits beside you and notices the humor in your expression, smiling to himself too. You didn’t expect to reach this level of closeness again so soon. Who knew it would take a work project to find your way back to each other? With the week coming to a close and a good catalog of photos under your belt thanks to him, you could say the glass was looking half full.
“You guys got any more stories? This shit’s hilarious!” Sunwoo says, still laughing.
“Loads, man,” Jake responds.
“He’s got the best memory of all of us. Probably remembers all of our first naps in elementary,” Heeseung adds.
“How about we focus on the present, please? Otherwise we’ll be here until the sun comes up, Dee and Dum,” Jay says, pointing to the prime suspects with their all-knowing smirks.
“What else is there to say, Jay? Jake and I have been toiling on the dredging boats. You keep guarding that white tower and saying no to your uncle every time he asks you to work at his restaurant. Same old, same old.”
You turn your head to stare at Jay, perplexed. “Why didn’t you say anything?” 
It’s always been Jay’s dream to make something of himself with his recipes. Bookmarks, sticky notes, anything with free space held an ingredient here or a step for a recipe there. It was like it was second nature, as were photographs for you.
How could he deny himself from what he wanted?
“I already have responsibilities here. I can’t drive up and down the highway to Park & Co. every day.”
“Start small, idiot.” You chide him, half-serious in your pestering. “Who said you couldn't do both? You can be a good son and still have your own dream.”
“Careful,” Jake says to you. “He might listen to you.”
“You’re the only one who gets through that cold heart of his,” Heeseung teases.
Jay gives the older boys a stern look, and they back off immediately.
On the walk back to your house, Jay’s jacket nestled around your shoulders, you grill him further on the prospect of him cooking seriously. “You should do it.”
Jay shakes his head, running his fingers through his hair. “And what’ll happen to the lighthouse? My dad will go back every morning on his cane and keep it working himself? No way.”
“Come on, who says you can’t do both?” You flaunt your arms in the air, emphasizing your point. “It’s not like it rains every day here.”
He looks at you with humored eyes, their shape becoming extremely thin when he smiles. “You’re even more stubborn as an adult, you know?
You poke your tongue out at him. “I could say the same about you, Seongie.”
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The rain soaks your clothes when you run through Jay’s door. You shake off the droplets in your hair, most of the strands needing to be wrung out in your fist. Jay gets you a towel to dry off with, laughing at your current state of affairs.
”Don’t make fun of me. Be glad I still came, asshole,” you warn, warming yourself with the dryness of the cotton towel.
Jay raises his hands in mercy. “I told you to come earlier! Forecasts are no joke.”
”Sometimes they’re wrong,” you say. 
”Ninety-five percent of the time, they’re not. Trust the lighthouse keeper next time, maybe? I’ve been watching those skies for three years. I know if and when the weathermen are full of shit.”
You roll your eyes and shuck your shoes off, “Whatever. Any chance you have a spare pair of warm socks for me? I may get frostbite.”
”One, that involves snow,” Jay says as he walks into his small bedroom, leaving you alone for a second before coming out with what you requested. “And two, promise to bring them back. I only have so many pairs before I have to go to the city for more.”
”Scout’s honor,” you promise. You switch out your soaked socks for Jay’s, the feeling of the fabric making you immediately warmer. It could also be the fireplace that Jay put kindling in before you got there, but it’s mostly the socks. “Thank you. I feel better already.”
“I’d offer you a set of clothes too, but I’m moving a lot of my stuff from my dad’s.”
“It’s not that far away, though. You really want to live in this tiny shack?”
Jay laughs and returns to his food on the stove. “Do you think I could bring a girl home living with him? I love him, but I’m getting too old to be his roommate.”
You smile and press your arms into the kitchen counter, but you know it’s false. The thought of Jay being with someone else sprouts a gargantuan knot of jealousy in your stomach. He’s never belonged to you, not by any means. Not only that, but your illogical departure gives you no right to claim him now. And yet…
“Hey, where’d you go?” He waves a dish towel in front of your face, a smile on his lips.
“Sorry, just lost in thought,” you play off your prying thoughts.
“Obviously.” He sticks his tongue out at you and continues to stir the concoction on the stove.
“What are you making anyway?”
“Seaweed soup. I haven’t been able to make you any since…the last birthday we spent together.”
Your body warms deep down to the soles of your feet at this surprise. “My birthday was three months ago.”
He chuckles and turns his head to you, smirking. “Consider it a belated birthday gift then.” He carries on stirring, but continues talking. “Besides, you always liked my soup compared to your mom’s. Too watery, if I remember right.”
You blush and step away from the counter. “Let’s not talk about her or her food.”
Jay’s face turns puzzled. “You’ve always been so bristly when we talk about your family. Your mom is one of the sweetest ladies in town." 
“You don’t get it. You didn’t grow up with her.”
“Hey, at least you have both parents around.”
You slam your hand down on another laminate countertop, growing more frustrated the longer the topic is broached. “Jongseong, please drop it.”
“Why are you getting so upset?” He asks, puzzled and growing alarmingly quiet at your outburst.
“Because you don’t get it! And you never will, okay? So let it go!”
The kitchen suddenly feels too suffocating, the memories of the past and your argument melding together in a way that makes any hunger that you had become a full stomach stuffed with nothing but anger and fear. You run out of the house and back into the rain, knowing if you say anything more, your secrets will fall around you like pellets soaking your skin.
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The lanterns fill the sky like a thousand stars, close enough for you to touch before they’re whisked away into the dark clouds above you. Even for your small town, every adult and child knows the end of summer festival is a time to make the last set of wishes and affirmations before autumn comes. If Jay’s father yearned for an easy season, he would buy a lantern to release on a night light tonight, as would your friends’ families who hoped for good health and fortune.
You smile when you manage to catch one, holding on tight despite knowing it’s against tradition. Once one is meant to float away, it was considered rude to stop it from continuing on its path upward.
Jay chuckles and grabs it from you, matching your pout in jest. “Next year, I’ll buy you your own, alright? Don’t be greedy!”
You roll your eyes and watch the lantern rise up and away from your spot on the beach. It shimmers in an amber glow until it slips away into the black sky overhead.
You turn to him, eyes lit up not just from the lantern flames. “Did you wish for anything this year?”
Jay shrugs. “I can’t really wish for anything ‘cause I didn’t get—“
“Don’t give me that! It’s symbolic, anyway. Just tell me,” you whine.
Jay only side-eyes you, a smirk playing on his lips.
You attempt to throw a bundle of sand in his direction, but he sees your upcoming attack the second you raise your arm. He takes your wrist in his hand, the clump disintegrating between your fingers. The two of you laugh as you try to wiggle free from his grasp.
You’re both a tangle of limbs until he finally pins you down on the ground. He hovers above you, panting hard. “I win,” Jay replies, his breathing ragged but eyes still sparkling from a successful takedown.
“You wish.”
In the flicker of lantern lights and midnight stars overhead, Jay can’t help himself from leaning down closer until there’s barely a breath between your lips. He lets every doubt that has lingered over the past fourteen years dissipate and surrenders to the moment, feeling the softness of your mouth as he kisses you.
You could be glowing as bright as the lights still being sent off into the sky. You feel like you are, anyway.
He doesn’t go faster or push you further, the simplicity of the act making you sparkle from within with every ebb and flow of your conjoined lips. The crackle of a firework is what makes the two of you come up for air, unaware of how much time has passed.
 You let the moment hang between you the entire walk home. He holds your hand, squeezing it every now and then, the action more valuable than any words he could say right now. He holds himself back from giving you another kiss to say goodnight, knowing there’s always tomorrow.
Minutes after you make it inside, the scene in front of you turns whatever joy was left from Jay’s presence into acid.
“Can you not do anything right around here? I ask for the simplest things and even that’s too much.” Your father points to the food in his hands with an air of disgust directed at your mother.
He spits his vitriol in her face, the pattern commonplace. The behavior is nothing new, but his eyes show something worse than normal brewing beneath the surface.
“I can fix it,” your mother assures him, trying to take the bowl from him. “I’ll throw out the old batch and—“
“So now you think wasting food is the better choice? Are you stupid?”
The two of them are unaware of your presence, but even if they were, you doubt that would change the downward spiral they were heading towards.
She tries to walk away from him like she always has, diffusing the situation in the only way she knows how, but he drops the bowl on the counter and takes her by the arm.
“You’re not leaving,” he warns. The next moments pass in a blur, each one that plays out making you hover outside of your body, looking down in disbelief. Your mother’s temple hits the wood with a terrible thud. The next second, your body is pressed against your father’s to pull him away, begging, “Daddy, please stop!” 
His upper arm has enough force to jam into your chest and knock you onto the kitchen tile below. Pain reverberates up your tailbone from hitting the floor in a violent bang.
Your mother comes from the daze of her assault to cover your body with her own. It’s a pointless defense, your father’s feet slamming hard on the floor as he walks away and into the bedroom without looking back once.
She apologizes profusely, holding your head in her hands as tears stream down her face without an endpoint. You can barely form a tear yourself, still unsure the past ten minutes happened at all. An hour ago, you had your first kiss, and now…
“Your aunt lives on a coast off the mainland. I can’t let you stay here anymore, my love.”
That moment is when you feel the water form in your eyes. You couldn’t leave now, not with so much left uncertain.
“Promise me you’ll leave this place. Don’t think about this night again and find something better, please.”
That entire night, the waves knocking into each other with the same force as you had encountered hours ago, you feel your heart shatter into a multitude of pieces, each fragment tinier and more painful than the last. The thought of Jay waking up to see you in the morning only to find you erased from his life, robs any chance of you sleeping on the boat ride to Wando.
He’ll try to call and text, for sure. But what could be said that would explain the last twenty four hours without breaking your promise to your mother? How could you live with sharing such intimate details of your household, even with someone as sacred to you as Jay is?
How could you make him believe it wasn’t his fault that you fled without revealing your most vulnerable and harsh reality? After coming so close to the future you always dreamed of with him, what would he think? What would he do?
So, like any coward does, you let the phone ring until your battery dies, not bothering to charge it again until you make it to your aunt’s. You tell yourself he’ll move on and life will be better with you safe and out of the picture. Every beat of your breaking heart may call you a liar, but you’ll learn to twist it into the truth one day.
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The next afternoon, sun slowly setting to meet the waves below, you walk towards the lighthouse with the courage your younger self didn’t have the night you ran away. Your heart tosses around in your mouth when you take the first step through the threshold, but now is the last time you fear the truth. If you couldn’t explain the circumstances back then, the least you could do was explain them now.
You take the trek up the steps to the top floor of the lighthouse, every step heavier than the last. Jay stands inside the lantern room cleaning the large bulb at the center of the space. He immediately tenses when you walk through the open door, but he says nothing. He only holds the same somber expression he had the first day you arrived back in Aewol. Only now, so much more rests behind his face that you cannot decipher.
“I’m sorry,” you say finally. The words release something you believed couldn’t be separated from your being. Your guilt remains present, but the apology provides a long-held breath of fresh air.
He looks up to meet your gaze, eyebrows furrowing just a touch. The setting sun casts amber shadows across his face, making his confusion breathtaking. Clearly, he’s unsure what exactly you’re apologizing for.
The next words already taste like lead in your mouth, but you can’t hold the weight of them for another second.
Speaking them out loud is what will set you free.
“The night I left, my dad pushed my mom into a cabinet,” you confess. The eight words you just uttered create a well of tears in your eyes, but you keep your voice level and solid. “He had always been…harsh before, not just with her, but that was the first night I ever saw him hurt her with his hands instead of his words.
“I tried to stop it from getting worse, and I fell down—no,” you take a breath, “h-he threw—he threw me down on the floor.” You feel foolish for trying to minimize his actions, knowing there’s no reason to protect him anymore. You lower your head, ashamed. “That was when my mom called my aunt in Wando. She begged me not to say anything, so I kept it a secret. You’re the first person I’ve ever told about it… and about how much of an asshole my father really is.”
You can’t help the way your words crumble on your tongue or the low whimper that erupts from your lips. You had accepted in silence the harsh reality of your father being a violent and cruel human being, but speaking the words aloud is another beast entirely.
You go cold, your figure limp until you feel Jay’s gentle fingers under your chin. They pull your face up to meet his, catching his glassy and red eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me then?”
You sniffle. “What would you have done? We were seventeen—“
“Fuck that,” Jay seethes, his face a mixture of anger and heartbreak. “I would’ve killed him then, just like I want to right now.”
You laugh and take his fingers in yours. “I made a promise.” You lock onto his gaze harder, trying to convey every ounce of regret you still feel. “I thought about calling you every day. I’d pick up the phone and didn’t know how to come up with the right words, especially after…”
Jay laughs, passing over the curve of your cheek with his thumb. It’s the rhythmic pattern of his touch that makes you come down from such heightened emotions. It’s always been his superpower, grounding you like this. “If I had known I wouldn’t see you again, I would’ve kissed you until the sun came up.”
You blush, your body flushing with heat. “Nothing’s stopping you now, Jongseong. And I’m not going anywhere.”
He steps forward, the shy boy you grew to love appearing in front of you. The last time you were this close, you both were unsure about most things in life, but not about how much you meant to him, and vice versa.
Now, the feelings he had put on hold for so long take hold of him, his heart a kaleidoscope of pent-up sensations when he finally presses his lips to yours. His mouth is ravenous, his tongue finding yours as his arms clutches onto your body with fervor.
You’re encased in him, all the lost time suddenly found in the spaces of his mouth on yours, your hands on his body, and the moans that leave your mouth. He undoes the buttons of your cardigan with quick ease, taking it off of your shoulders and somewhere in the room you don’t care to remember. You help him pull the sweater over his head to kiss the column of his throat and top of his chest, making him shudder.
You both pause to hurry down to the drawing room below, not wanting to continue on the iron floor next to the bright bulb of the lighthouse. Yes, the cot off to the side of the room is not incredibly comfortable, but you care little about its lack of comfort when Jay lays you down on your back and smothers your body in kisses. He makes a map of your skin until he meets the apex of your thighs, your body highly strung by the time he kisses the center of your legs.
You clutch his hair with both hands and hold tight in the midst of his ministrations, his whispered words of affirmation and the figure-eight patterns of his tongue saying just enough to push you closer to the edge of ecstasy.
He lifts his head from your body to crawl over you, his heart in his mouth as he says the words that have always been in his mind and heart from the second he saw you. “I love you.”
You’re unsure if it’s normal to cry at such a confession or in the midst of your current situation, but regardless, there are no tears of fear or pain. They’re ones that fill the silence between you with what he already knows to be true. But you say the words he needs to hear anyway. “I love you, too, Seongie.”
This is what it feels like to be at home. His body against yours, him sliding so easily inside of you without a word needed for the immense amounts of pleasure that already exists. It could be a handful of minutes or a span of time that carries over into the next morning. All that matters is his lips on your own and his hips meeting yours with every thrust.
And in between every movement, he has to remind you how much he loves you. His words and feelings are already embossed into your heart, but it’s nice to hear the breathless cadence of his voice. “I love you so much,” he groans, his end close with the sudden stutters of his body.
You fall off the cliffside together, your bodies in sync in the best possible way as your eyes see the stars from the very first night you kissed in the back of your eyelids. And when he has his hands in your hair, his touch lulling you to sleep, you wonder why it took you this long to come back to the one person who has always been the safest space in your world.
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The two of you stay nestled in the thin blanket, Jay’s body your source of warmth in the small drawing room of the lighthouse. The cot barely holds your bodies, but with you both squeezing together and not wanting to let go, you make it work.
Jay takes stray hairs from your face to tuck behind your ears. “I can’t believe you didn’t know how bad my crush was until the festival.”
You giggle into his chest. “I wasn’t paying attention to boys back then! How would I have known?” You hold his gaze, suddenly vulnerable.
He chuckles. “I think I was pretty obvious.”
“To everyone but me, I guess,” you joke. “Besides, I think I always knew I’d end up with you, strangely.”
“That’s not strange, not at all.” He kisses you tenderly, nipping your lips until you laugh into his mouth. “Perfect. At least to me.”
“Same,” you agree. “I’ve never felt more at home than when I’m with you.”
Jay responds by holding you tighter between his arms. He kisses the top of your head before whispering, “So where do we go from here?”
The answer is simple, but that doesn’t make it any easier to face.
Jay looks deeply into your eyes and senses the words you cannot say, and the strength of his stare and his arms as your protective walls from all the harm that still exists in this world gives you the power to confront what you need to.
That afternoon, leaving Jay in the lighthouse with your heart fully in his possession, you know you have to face the demons that wait for you in your childhood home. If you are to have a future together, the first thing you have to do is make peace with the past.
A handwritten note on the fridge tells you your mother went out for groceries, giving you the perfect excuse to release the words that would end your terror once and for all.
You enter your parents’ room to see your father, unmoved from the spot you saw him in on the first day you were back home. Your mother pleaded for you to check in every now and then now that you were back, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. Not until now.
You move the chair by his bedside out to sit down. When you finally face him again, you take note of the details you were too blinded by indifference to notice before. You observe the wrinkles on his forehead, the sunken divots under his eyes, the age lines surrounding his mouth, the frailness of his body.
The weight he’s lost since his accident makes all his features stand out more. All that he’s lost, but has also always been, is on full display now: this husk of a man without the venomous words and bravado to hide behind is truly nothing to be scared of anymore.
 “You’re so much smaller than I realized.” You say it with a breath of relief, any fear or anger that was left behind for him in your soul replaced with pity. You can walk away without regrets or words you wish you could’ve said, because you know now it’s a waste of your peace. Maybe one day, you’ll find it in your heart to forgive, even. Not today, but someday.
You walk away with no grievances left, back in the direction of the lighthouse with a new purpose and ready to take the path you were always meant to. Back to the home you’ve always had resting inside of the one you love.
Jay stands with his back facing you, staring off into the expanse of sea in front of him. His shoulders ease as you step closer.
“You’re back,” he says with saccharine happiness. He takes your hand in his and presses your fingers to his lips.
“I am,” you respond. You kiss him with your whole soul, incredibly in love and unafraid of what will come next.
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“Babe! The new issue is here!”
You open your eyes to the sound of Jay’s words. You could barely doze off when he was so excited to grab the mail this morning. It was only delivered a few minutes ago, but of course he has to check for the newest spread of Otherworldly in your mailbox. To his happiness and your shy pride, your name’s plastered in almost every section of the photography credits.
Convincing your boss to let you work for the magazine from your hometown turned out to be easier than expected. With his happiness from your newfound inspiration, it seemed like you could take pictures of algae for all he cared and it would be a hit in the magazine’s eyes.
You weren’t the only one who could take credit, though. Jay’s name was also included in some of the photos, his insight into Aewol’s cuisine and new sous chef position at Park & Co providing more than enough influence for your photography. The lighthouse would always be his priority (aside from you), but his second love of food could not be kept at bay any longer.
He opens the magazine to the first page that features your photos, the centerfold being of Jay’s original recipe for hoedeopbap. “It looks even better in print,” Jay says, his face three shades brighter staring at the meal.
You giggle and wrap your arms around his middle, peeking your head out from the side of his shoulder to look at the pages. “It’s really good, isn’t it?”
“Some of the best you’ve ever done.” He turns in your hold to press your chest to his, kissing your forehead in the process. “How’d I get so lucky?”
“Actually, getting lucky is how we got this.” You take his hand and rest it on the curve of your stomach, fifteen weeks peaking out from under the midriff of your tank top.
He laughs and presses his lips to your cheek. “I love you.”
To your surprise, peace was easier to find than you had expected. Confronting what you ran away from all those years ago feels like a distant memory, the pain of the past a part of another reality. There are no monsters that creep in the shadows or secrets to keep locked behind closed doors.
All that remains is the ease that comes from a life filled with nothing but love and happiness, as weightless and freeing as a lantern floating through the sky.
“I love you too, Park Jongseong.”
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@junekissed (thank for beta-ing also june!! ilysm) @yvnempire @sjylouvre @mini-mews @jayparked @heesuncore @yoursjaeyun @sungbeams @jenoslutie @loserlvrss
𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 ౨ৎ˚₊
@kvanity-main @sweetvenomnet @onedoornet @sayxonet @violetanet @svthub @whipped-kpop-creators
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago
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upon his grace 1
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power dynamics, cheating, bullying, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You are called to court after the end of the civil war, but find yourself facing many challenges, expected and not. (fantasy medieval au)
Characters: king!Steve Rogers
Note: bro, Idk how I start at point A and get to fucking outer space. Also happy bday to Steverino.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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The gardens of Astra Castle are unlike any you’ve seen before. Certainly, you’ve never been to a royal castle previously. Your father’s own hold is modest, still bearing the wooden foundation, whereas the rich lords have poured mortar and built in stone. 
So, it is a great honour to be among the noble women chosen to serve the queen. Most unexpected. As a daughter of a lower house, it is rather unusual, but it comes with the newly set writ tabled at the end of the uprising. That is how your father tells it anyhow. 
King Steven is as newly crowned as he is newlywed. After a lengthy revolt against the previous king, the land has settled, and upon his victory, the new ruler promises the expansion of prosperity to all. The very precedence of his war rested on the greed of the former court and its covetous lords. 
To those who took up his mantle, he has made good his word. To the commoners, he has sent bread and ale, livestock and alms; to the nobles, he has granted titles and lands. You were of the same doubt as your father, however, you expected to be forgotten in the disarray. 
Yet, you were not. You’re there with several other ladies. A set of blond twins borne of a duke and duchess, the sole heir of a widowed countess, and several earl’s daughters such as yourself. Unlike them, you do not wear satin or silk, not muslin either. You have only the dyed linen your mother attempted to enhance with some embroidery around the cuffs and collar. 
“Marcia and Marigold,” the twins introduce themselves as you cluster together in the gardens, grooms and servants bustling around carriages and chests. “Lady Calliope,” they call out the countess’ daughter, “we met prior, yes? Your mother is near Estrela.” 
“She is,” Calliope answers in her stern manner, herself seeming a widow in her black dress. The shimmery fabric makes up for its single tone. 
“Ameri, Dorida, and... Selene,” they point to the other girls, themselves clothed in scarlet, rose, and azure respectively. “We know the earls, your fathers. They gathered at our father’s hold for the battle near Caffre.” 
The twins take turns speak so that sometimes you cannot track whose lips are moving. It is even that they trade off in the middle of sentences. You find yourself almost as lost by their words as your new surroundings. 
“And you...” The twins turn their jade eyes upon you. It is there you have found the only difference in them; they have the same heights, the same hair, the same gowns even, but there is a sliver of grey through Marcia’s green iris. “We haven’t figured who you are.” 
“My father is an earl. In Woodsdam.” 
“Woodsdam,” they echo in unison and share a look. They are perplexed. 
“A minor house,” Calliope provides. “a farmer more than a noble, if I’m not mistaken.” 
“We have vast lands and we tend to them, yes,” you assure. You expect their condescension. Your father warned you for it but he bid that you keep your chin up. The king has given him a mission of his own and so you will represent the family for the time. “We keep our people well and we fed the king’s troops when they marched." 
“Mm, sounds very... common,” Marigold grins and her sister snorts into her hand. 
“We know many lords like us, yes. They work hard amidst their vassals. It keeps the lands strong so that we may better serve the crown,” you return evenly.  
Your mother helped you prepare. She coached you to keep your manners and your spine. The latter is much more difficult as you face these ladies and their bobbles with only a ribbon in your hair and a pair of patched gloves. 
“Woodsdam? I think I rode through it once on the way to my grandfather’s summer castle,” Ameri tuts, “it was little more than a swamp.” 
“It must’ve been the spring rains, perhaps, lady,” you offer. 
“Summer house,” she enunciates, “one travels there in the summer.” 
Your cheek twitches at her barbed retort. Very well. You are not used to their sharpness. Their chittering has thus far centered on gossip and the cost of their new caps. 
“A wonder the pauper’s daughter received an invite. Are you certain you can read, lady?” Dorida snipes and looks to the twins for approval. You notice how they all tend to do so. 
“It was sent to my father, Lord Eldon,” your voice quavers. You are not so strong as your mother bid you to be.  
They cackle at your meek response, “the precious maiden of Woodsdam.” 
You put your head down as the activity all around threatens to swallow you up. You wish the ground would rent and you would fall right through. All your excitement has dissipated to a sludge in your veins. You touch your cheek as you try not to show your embarrassment. 
“The Lord of Woodsdam,” a deep voice startles you as boots approach from behind, “is that what I heard?” 
You stiffen up as the ladies before you hush and blink, almost in tandem. They curtsey as their faces wash over in shock and you turn to face the newcomer. A man in a deep blue vest over black sleeves and grey breeches. He wears belt of gold and a circlet across his brow in a similar hue. It is that which betrays his statues. 
You lower your eyes and mimic the other women, mortified to be faced with new king so informally. You would not think him wandering out in the yard. Still, he has vowed to be unlike the former leige. That he would be of the people. 
“King Steven, your majesty,” the others titter in a messy chant and you murmur your own propriety as you back away. You find yourself still to the shoulder of the king as the other ladies give no room for you to join. 
The vision of him stains your mind. He is tall, with dark blond tresses that extend past his neck, and blue eyes which put his own attire to shame. He has a jaw which looks etched in stone and a bearing which matches his rank. He is tall and broad and a finely built knight. 
“It is an honour,” Marcia says most boldly. 
“You may rise,” he allows in a breezy timbre. “I did hear my wife would receive new ladies. Young ladies.” 
“Your majesty,” the murmur rolls across each lip. 
“It is much needed. We have so many established ladies at court and yet we need to think of the future. Of the next generation,” he declares as he emphasizes his words with his large hand. You watch his garnet ring to keep from so brazenly looking him in the face. 
“Certainly, your majesty,” Marcia and Marigold chime in unision. 
“And don’t worry for there are many young lords as well,” the king laughs galely at the quip which makes the ladies, yourself included, blush. “Ah, then, Woodsdam I believe we were speaking of...” 
You blink and glance at the other ladies. They are cowed, unsure if they were overheard in their derision. You hope as much as they that they were not. It is rather unflattering. 
“My father, Lord Eldon,” you explain, “your majesty.” 
“You? You are the young lady of Woodsdam I heard so much of.” 
“You did? Er, your majesty,” you curtsey apologetically; unnecessarily. 
“Certainly, I did. Your father was a great assistance in me holding counsel with the lower lords. He is very patient. “When not about his duty, he spoke of you oft. Though what matters are more important than family?” 
“Yes, your majesty,” you can’t help a smile, “my father is a very kind man.” 
“Kind and courageous. I’m certain you’ve inherited as much,” the king praises, “and these other ladies. The twins who belong to Mawsley, the Countess of Clovers daughter, and the three earls daughters from the White Plains.” 
The ladies each bow their heads as he proclaims them by their forebearers’ titles. You watch from aside, feeling even more out-of-place. The king recites them all proudly as he extends a finger for each. 
“Allow me myself to extend a welcome to Astra. When you are sorted, my wife shall receive you all and have you acquainted with the grounds. I hope you enjoy them, we’ve had the gardeners at work day and night,” he pronounces, “for now, I must be off, for a king has many obligations and not so much time.” 
He bows and turns on his heel, marching off with his shoulder straight and head high. He walks as a soldier does, not some lord. You’ve seen the difference before, more recently in the aftermath of battle. A soldier is more akin to a farmer, much as your father, whereas a Lord tends to keep his steps tight. 
“Wow, oh my,” Dorida fans herself, “he is rather handsome.” 
“Oh yes,” Marcia and Marigold say, the latter forging ahead, “we met him at our father’s castle. He is ever so charming.” 
“Hm, and the queen would love to hear it, I’m certain,” Calliope intones brusquely. 
“The queen is not here,” Ameri sneers, “so what does it matter? Besides, is it so wrong to state a truth?” 
“He is very elegant,” Selene agrees. 
“Much too kind, as well,” Marigold snips, “Woodsdam? He speaks as if it more than some paltry farmhouse.” 
“You’d never even heard of it,” Calliope remarks. 
“And how had you, hm? You seem the bookish type. Perhaps you should leave the maps to the men. What good will a river or road do for a widow’s welp?” 
“Needn’t be cruel,” Calliope rebuffs. 
“Pity if this is the lot they send,” Marcia shakes her head as the sisters share another cryptic look. 
You keep to yourself. That is all you can do. It is better to watch and learn than to leap and land wherever you might. Your mother always said so and she was your best teacher. 
“Right, there must be some maid who might show us to our rooms,” Marigold stands on her toes and waves at each passing servant. “I tire of the sunlight and boorish company.” 
👑
You have two trunks awaiting you in your chambers. Not as the other ladies who had at least a dozen each. Less humble than your lunger are the rooms themselves.
There is an antechamber hung with tapestries showing wildlife and flora, a table set for two and cushioned bench by the window. The bedroom is draped in similar hangings with a four-post bed and a grand hearth. A desk, another bench, a woven carpet, and fine accouterments on square tables. And a closet for the commode as well and a pot in the far corner of the bedchamber. 
If only your mother and father could see this. They would be just as amazed. You can’t help but admire all of it. To touch the curtains as you approach the window and stare off at the afternoon sky. The gardens are a medley of hues; petals and thorns; leaves and dirt. It’s all so wonderful, you can still hardly believe it. 
Seems those other ladies can’t either. You can’t help but think of their words anon. They said so outrightly what you doubted inwardly. You don’t belong here. It must be so clear to them. 
You lean on the ledge and peer down into the garden pathways. It is almost a labyrinth with how intricately they’ve laid out the hedges. You lower yourself down to your elbows and cross your arms as you sigh. 
Your eyes are drawn from the swaying roses to the dark speck that appears below. You squint at first. From the second floor, it is harder to discern. It is the glimmer of gold in his hair and the defined gait that gives away the king. For an instant, you believe you might be dreaming. 
He walks along one path and to the next. There is another with him. A man with darker hair and a stauncher figure. They speak and stop just as they enter a circled walkway centered by a large vase of flowers. The other man talks, though you can hear neither, and the king rubs his chin. 
You should turn away. They might think you an eavesdropper. Oh, too late! You don’t dare move as the king tilts his head. You wouldn’t want to pique his attention. You cannot tell if he has spotted you. Not until he raises a hand and waves. The other man stops and looks to follow the gesture. 
You stand up straight but before you can flee in horror, you recall yourself. It is improper to turn your back to the king. You lift your hand and return the wave. He dips his head and turns to clap his companion’s shoulder, pointing him onward. 
Oh, you hope he is not unhappy. If you pray, perhaps he will not have recognised you. You needn’t an enemy of the king as well. 
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mama2bears · 2 months ago
Note
I love the way you write! Do you ever take requests? If so, could you do something where Tyler and Female Reader are dating and they have a big fight before he goes on a chase. She either says she doesn't love him or doesn't want him to come back or something like that. He leaves heartbroken and then is in a bad accident or maybe he's badly hurt and missing? Lots of regreat for things said or not? Whatever you can come up with like that, as long as they remain together at the end! Thank you!
A/N: I have never done requests before and I hope I have done this right. Thank you so much for the request, I really loved the idea so I gave it my best shot. I hope you love it. This will be at least a two part story. I'll post the second part as soon as I get it done.
Unspoken Words
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Warnings: Mention of sex, unplanned pregnancy, car accident, injury, lots of angst, maybe a few swear words
Part 1
Tyler Owens watched the weather forecast and double checked his own data with a worried look. “They're calling for storms tomorrow.” he called, “From my data it looks to be a big outbreak about an hour or so from here.”
“Remember I told you that I was making special plans for tomorrow?” you reminded him.
“Huh?” he frowned, “Oh yeah. You did tell me that last week, didn't you. Sorry, Darling. I forgot. Can we just reschedule or something?”
You felt tears stinging your eyes. “You always fucking do this, Tyler.” you slammed a plate down in the sink. “Just forget it. You wouldn't care anyhow.”
“Darling...why are you so upset?” he stood with concern on his face. Sure, you got mad sometimes. He hurt your feelings sometimes, but you normally didn't get this upset this fast. “I just suggested that we could change whatever plans you had tomorrow night to another night...a night that's not a major tornado outbreak.”
“Tomorrow night was something special to me Tyler...but you don't give a damn. What am I, just something fun to do on the side?” tears were streaming down your face now as you yell at him, “You never really loved me at all, did you?”
“Y/N! Darling!” Tyler went towards you, his face showing the heartbreak he felt. You push him away as he reached out to you and run into the bedroom, slamming the door and locking it.
“Honey...please don't do this. You know my job. You know I gotta be there for a big tornado outbreak...”
“Just go!” you seethed.
“I don't have to leave until tomorrow morning.” Tyler said softly. “I can make it up to you tonight. When I get back we can do your special night.”
“Don't even act like you care now. Just leave. The team, the tornadoes, everything is more important then I am. When was the last time you took me on a date, Tyler?” You yelled.
He started to answer and tears filled his eyes as he realized he couldn't remember the last time you two had actually been on a date.
“That's what I thought.” you seethed. “Now tell me how many times you have canceled our plans because of tornadoes or the team needed you. Some bullshit other then me. You don't care that I need you. You push me aside to do whatever else you want, then come home and think having sex makes up for it all. Well I am done Tyler. I am done with it all. I am done with you. You don't want me? That's fine. I don't want you anymore either, so just get the fuck out!” you sobbed.
He leaned against the door, wanting nothing more then hold you in his arms and tell you how much he loved you, how special you were to him, that you were his whole world. Tyler and you had been dating for about three years and just moved in with each other this year. You were used to him going chasing storms, sometimes at the last minute and sometimes for weeks at a time. However, you had some big news to share with him and you had put a lot of time and effort into a special meal tomorrow. It just seemed like Tyler could care less about your feelings and right now, it was tearing you apart.
“I am sorry, Y/N.” was all he was able to whisper though his tears. He prayed this wasn't the end of his relationship with you. “I have something important to ask you. Can we talk before I leave? I was planning on talking to you about it tonight.” he whispered.
“I am done talking Tyler! I don't care what you have to say. Just leave. I don't care if you ever come back here or not.” you spat.
Tyler's heart shattered. You never talked to him like that, especially before he left on a chase. You both knew that storm chasing was dangerous and there was always that risk that he wouldn't come back.
He pulled a black box out of his pocket and stared at it and then at the door. “Y/N, please? Can we talk just for a minute before I leave.” he whispered. “You know I don't like leaving for a chase with us being upset.”
You didn't answer. “I love you.” he whispered.
“I doubt that.” you scoffed.
Tyler couldn't stop the tears from falling. He didn't know how he had hurt you so badly, but he knew he had messed up bad. You didn't even believed he loved you anymore. He eyed his overnight bag on the sofa that he had packed in case they got a hotel tomorrow. “You want me to leave?” he asked, his voice cracking with sobs.
“I can't stand to even look at you right now. Yes, leave.” you yell, curling up on the bed and sobbing.
“Alright. I am going to go crash at Boone's tonight. If you change your mind, call me. Darling, I really want to talk to you. I want to make this right.”
You didn't answer, so he picked up his bag and stood at the bedroom door. “I love you.” he called. It was a thing you two always did before he went on a chase. No matter what, you made sure the last words said to each other was “I love you.”
He waited, but you didn't answer. “Darling, I love you more then anything...”
“Drop the shit Tyler. You can't say you love me and never back it up with actions. Just get the hell out and don't worry about coming back. I doubt I'll be here if you do.”
Tyler's head dropped, his shoulders slumped as he shuffled to the door. Maybe he had messed up one too many times. Maybe this time, you really didn't love him anymore. He had failed you, he had failed to show you how much he loved you and now...he was scared to death that he had lost you.
He walked out the door, closing it tightly behind him and tossed the bag in the back of the truck. He took one last look at the house before driving off with sobs racking his body. He could only pray that you calmed down by the time he came home.
* * * * * * * *
The Next Day
* * * * * * * *
“So, T...are you crashing at my place today or has Y/N forgiven you?” Boone asked while they were stationed at a gas station, waiting to see which way the storms were going.
“I don't know.” Tyler snapped.
“Didn't you call her?” Boone asked.
“No. Not yet.” he was still mad and hurt about how things happened yesterday. “I just don't get what was so damn special today!”
“I don't know, man. Women can be impossible to understand.”
“Is that why you don't have a girlfriend?” Tyler quipped.
“Well at least I am not getting kicked out of my own house!”
“It's her house too.” Tyler sighed, looking at his phone for the hundredth time that morning, hoping you were going to call him.
“Make the first move man. Call her.” Boone said. “Even if she's still is pissed and hangs up on you or doesn't answer...call her.”
“Fine.” Tyler picks up the phone and calls your cell waiting for you to answer until it goes to voice mail.
“Hey Darling. I am really sorry about how things went yesterday. Call me back. I love you.” he tossed the phone down to the floor of the truck, “Some good that did.”
“Oh shit...oh shit no.” Boone looked at the radar.
“What is it?” Tyler looked over and his heart dropped. A large storm cell was forming just outside of the city you lived in. The weather reports weren't calling for anything bad, but Tyler knew by the looks of it. The tornado outbreak wasn't going to happen here...it was going to happen right over his town, his house...where you were.
“Give me the damn phone! Boone, go ride with Lily.” Tyler barked. “We aren't chasing this one, but I am going to drive like a bat at of hell and try to get home before it hits. I don't want Y/N there alone. She may not even know what's coming.”
“We'll head that way and meet you at your house.” Boone retrieved Tyler's phone from the floor of the truck and hurried to Lily's van. Tyler's truck could drive much faster then the RV or Van and was the only hope of reaching you on time.
Tyler swore when his call went straight to your voice mail again, “Darling listen to me. A tornado outbreak is heading your way. It could be bad. It's not being reported yet by the weather stations. I am on my way home. I am on my way, baby. Get to the basement and wait for me there. I love you.”
He threw his phone down in the passengers seat and put the pedal to the metal speeding toward home. He was about half an hour away, the storm looked to be about 15 minutes away. If he was quick enough, maybe, just maybe he could beat it.
* * * * *
You glanced at the phone as it dinged, alerting you to yet another voicemail. It was Tyler again and you didn't care to answer and you didn't care to listen to the voicemail. Right now you didn't want to hear anything that he had to say.
You heart was breaking over how things ended last night. For the first time that you could remember since being together, you didn't tell him you loved him before he left and that kept nagging at the back of your mind. What if something happened. Did he know that you loved him? At the same time, you were still hurt that he never put your needs first. It was nothing to him to cancel plans if it meant chasing another storm. You were still mad and weren't ready to make up yet.
Tears start brimming in your eyes. Why did you get so upset last night? Did it really matter if you had your special dinner tonight or tomorrow or next week? You look at the piece of paper now laying on the counter. You wanted it to be special. You wanted to tell Tyler Owens on Father's Day that he was about to become a father. You still felt terrible for the way you acted. The only thing you could guess was hormones were at work.
You grab your phone and call Tyler. You had to apologize and you had to make sure you said those three little words...”I love you.”
You sigh when it went straight to voicemail. “Tyler...I am sorry for last night. I am so terribly sorry. We need to talk, it's something amazing...at least I hope it is. We will talk when you get home. I love you, Tyler. Always and Forever, I love you.”
* * * * *
Tyler was pushing 110 and was only about five minutes away. The storm was probably about 4 minutes away but he was determined to get to Y/N no matter what. The ringing of his phone pulled his attention away from the road. He normally wouldn't look at the phone while driving, but..it could have been you. He saw your name and picture on the phone and leaned over to try to grab it.
Suddenly, the truck swerved and he grabbed the wheel, over correcting. Tires squealed as Tyler fought with the steering wheel. The alert was blaring on his phone now, warning him of the tornado that was approaching his house. He wasn't going to make it in time. 'Please be in a safe place, Y/N.' he whispered. The truck skidded off the road, the tires catching in the wet grass and it flipped, end over end, rolling down a steep embankment. Tyler curses under his breath, forgetting to put on the harness...his seat belt was barley keeping him in the seat. Pain shot though his body and he couldn't tell where it was coming from anymore. Glass shattered as the truck slammed against a tree, landing upside down. “I love you..” he whispered just before his body went limp.
* * * * *
You heard the sirens blaring, your phone alerting you, and you heard the roaring winds outside. You ran down the stairs into the basement, all the time thinking of Tyler. Did he know the tornado was here? He could have stayed home with you and seen a tornado, he didn't have to chase. You wondered if he knew that and choose to leave just to get away from you. After how you treated him, you didn't blame him.
“Hang on little one.” you whisper, putting a hand on you stomach. “This is your first tornado. We'll be okay.” a tear rolled down you cheek, wishing Tyler was there, his protective arms around you.
**Part 2 Coming Soon**
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bellesdreamyprofile · 3 months ago
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a baby miracle: part 3
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You were officially due in a week. This was the last day where you and Benny were being generous hosts to your friends from the club as the doctors advised you not to exaggerate anything. To be fair, even instructing Benny how to bake the perfect dessert did a number on you, so you didn’t mind resting.
“Anyhow, if you need more clothes I got some, honey. Although just girls stuff.”, Betty laughed and grasped her juice glass, taking a sip from it. You nodded and lovingly patted her arm. “Do you guys know the gender yet?”
“Thank you, Betty.”, you said. “And no, we don’t. We thought to keep it as a surprise.”, you smiled and glanced out of the window, catching a glimpse of Johnny showing his car to Benny. “Also thank you for the car. I don’t think I would make it to the hospital on the motorcycle.”, you laughed and turned her way again.
She just shook her head. “Ain’t nothing to thank us for, darling. You guys are our family.”, Betty’s sincere words got to your heart, to the point were lucid tears were forming in your eyes. She took notice and smiled lovingly at you, grasping your hand.
“I remember my first pregnancy…”, Betty smiled at the memory and twirled her drink in the glass. You couldn’t help but smile at the story she was about to tell, your hands immediately found your baby bump.
“I was doin´ okay… I really wanted this baby and since Johnny and I were married, I assumed we were on the same page.”, your smile slowly faded away from your lips as the story started sounding a little too familiar to your own. “He left. Said he couldn’t do it— but then he came back to me— back to us.”
Silence followed up as you swallowed thickly, unsure whether or not to share your personal experience. “Benny wanted to leave too…”, you looked down, unable to meet her piercing gaze. “I convinced him to stay and he did… Just weeks ago we bought a little denim jacket for our little one.”, you chuckled and wiped away one stray tear.
“I’m scared, Betty.”, you revealed to her. “He’s been so perfect. But I’m afraid… I’m afraid that once the baby comes—“, you shook your head and lowered your gaze as a sob escaped your lips. Betty’s eyes widened in surprise.
“No, no, no, honey. It’s gonna be all good.”, she wrapped an arm around you and mentally cursed herself for bringing up that kind of story in your kind of state. “I just wanted to tell ya… Because look at Johnny with our girls. He’s an amazing father and you won’t have to worry about Benny, Y/N.”
You looked up and sniffled. “You think so?”
Betty smiled lovingly at you. “I know so.”, her smile widened as she suddenly remembered an event that occurred a week ago. “You know, last week someone made a huge deal about his wife being pregnant.”, she wiggled her eyebrows at you.
“My Benny?”, you almost laughed at the scenario you created in your head. “What’d he say?”
“Well, you know me. I was smokin’ and chattin’ away when I heard glass breakin’ and shit.”, she explained, making you nod. “You know the usual things. But there was yelling too and it was Benny and some guy.”, Betty continued and glanced over her shoulder.
“Anyhow, in a nutshell, this guy was saying things about you and this little bundle of joy over here—“, she pointed at your bump. “And Benny gave him a lesson or two about messing with his family.”, the glint in her eyes made you believe there was more to her story, but for your sake she kept it short and simple.
You blinked at her and tapped your bump, almost in desperate need of a kick from your little baby. “That explains the bruises on his arm.”, you said absentmindedly.
Betty smiled at you lovingly as you had yet to realize the point she was trying to make. “He loves you, honey. The both of you. There will be disappointments along the way - for this ain’t no easy men to deal with. But the outcome at the end will be sweeter than you think.”
“You even got the license for this, man?”, Benny blew out the smoke from his cigarette and raised his eyebrows at Johnny. The older man laughed and shook his head, lighting his own cigarette. “I’m kidding.”
Benny leaned against the car and looked straight ahead, catching a glimpse of your smile from the window. His lips twitched at the way your dimples showed and your nose scrunched. He sighed and looked down.
“You’re overthinking it.”, he wordlessly turned his head to Johnny, waiting for him to elaborate.
“I ain’t thinking at all.”, Benny remarked and brought the cigarette to his lips. Johnny shook his head and moved to lean against his friend’s motorcycle.
“The day Betty told me she was pregnant, I ran away.”, Benny looked up at his words, feeling the familiar burning feeling in his chest. “I didn’t come back until three months later.”, his jaw clenched at the memory and kicked the cigarette butt away.
“I don’t wanna ask ya nothing, man. I don’t know what you went through with your Y/N, but let me tell ya something.”, Benny looked away again and swallowed thickly. “It’s gonna be alright. Everything is gonna turn out just fine.”
Benny shook his head at his words, keeping his gaze down. “I’m gonna be… A terrible father.”
Johnny’s brows furrowed as he grabbed another cigarette. “You? A terrible father? C’mon man.”
But his head kept shaking in disagreement. “I can’t provide for myself. I have no idea how I’ve provided for Y/N for this long. But for a kid? Someone that looks up to you?”, he grabbed another cigarette and glanced at his motorcycle. “I can’t.”
Johnny looked at him and all he could see was a broken man. Shoulders slung down, a wandering gaze and a frown on his lips. “You can. It’s done. I’ll tell ya what you can’t do right now, Benny.”, Johnny moved away from the motorcycle and walked closer to his friend. “You can’t leave her or the kid. So what? You don’t think I fuck up every now and then? It’s in the job description. It’s natural.”
Benny sighed and moved off the car. “You don’t understand nothing.”
“There ain’t nobody that understands this better than I do.”, Johnny knew what was going on in that messy head of his, which was why he was so keen on showing Benny the way. He didn’t want him to make the same mistake he did.
Benny pulled out the car keys he was given from Johnny and handed them back to him. “Give ‘em to Y/N. I gotta go. Clear my head.”, the older man grabbed the keys and wordlessly watched him take off on his motorcycle.
You usually weren’t too worried when Benny disappeared for half a day, but since the talk with Betty about all of your concerns, now you didn’t feel all too relaxed.
The bed was cold and the baby had been kicking more than usual - almost as if to tell you that it was time. Right on time you felt a sharp pain in your abdomen, making you wince and grasp your baby bump in comfort.
“Ow, not now. Please not now.”, your voice was a little whisper above the occasional roaring motors from the cars outside. You slowly moved to sit up against the headboard and took a deep breath.
Benny hadn’t come home yet and the car was still parked outside. Could it be that he was gone for good? No. Not your Benny, no. Right?
Deciding to finally stand up and distract yourself, you passed by the now fully equipped nursery and smiled at the sight of teddy bears and colourful little clothes. Your baby was going to be a pretty little baby.
But the pain made you snap from the mental film you had created for yourself. You still made it downstairs with a dead grip on the railing. Sitting on the couch in front of the tv, you prayed for Benny to show up at the door at any moment. Whatever was happening to your body right now wasn’t supposed to be happening for a week.
“Alrighty baby. Hang in there.”, you murmured and reached over for the remote to turn on the tv. It was two in the morning, so you didn’t really have high hopes for any entertaining shows - just anything to make you forget about the pain.
One hour in and the shitty show had just finished and still no sight of your husband. The car keys, that Betty and Johnny had so kindly given to you, were calling your name as the pain increased.
Letting out another puff of breath, you grabbed the hospital bag you had prepared weeks prior and clumsily grabbed the car keys from the bowl.
Tears were streaming down your face as you adjusted the seat for yourself, pulling it closer to the steering wheel. Still no sight of Benny. You backed off the driveway and abruptly stopped as another contraction shook your body.
Your forehead met the steering wheel, the pain you were in making it impossible to keep calm. But you couldn’t give birth in the car. No, no, no. You had to make it to the hospital for the baby - with or without Benny.
With a heavy heart and abundant strength, you finally drove to the hospital, occasionally speeding or abruptly hitting the brakes as another contraction came through.
You hastily parked in the lot and looked at the hospital lights, sighing as more pain took over. Your eyes moved from the baby bag to your bump. How could you do this on your own? How?
“I can do this.”, you said shakily and brushed the tears off your face. “I’m strong and—“, you winced at another contraction. “I can do this.”
You let out a deep breath and got out of the car, taking the baby bag from the passenger seat. Wobbling like a little duck, you made your way to the reception, the woman’s eyes widened at the sight of your distressed self.
“Hi, I’m Y/N Cross and I’m very—“, you stopped, squeezing your eyes shut at the pain. “I’m very pregnant.”
The woman walked around the table and grasped the wheelchair, moving it towards you. “Please, take a seat. You’ll be seeing a doctor in just few moments.”
They made you change into the ugliest hospital gown you had ever seen. Your eyes darting to the door even when the doctors said it was now safe to push.
You still had the audacity to shake your head in protest. “I-I can’t. Not without my husband.”, you cried and the doctors exchanged worried glances.
A nurse approached you and gently put her hand on yours. You looked up and noticed a kind smile framing her face. “You can do this. If there’s anyone who can do this, it’s you.”
You shook your head and let out a scream at the pain. “I can’t without my Benny— Please call my Benny.”, your sobs filled the room and your head shook once more. But then there was the reminder from earlier. Do it for the baby.
I’m doing this for the baby.
When Benny came home at six a.m., something felt off. The lights were off and the car was gone from the driveway. Brows furrowed in confusion as he opened the door - it was unlocked.
No sights of robbery, just a television playing a shitty show and your nightgown on the couch.
Benny walked upstairs and felt his heart in his throat at the sight of your now empy bed.
Before he could think about any possible scenarios, the phone started ringing from downstairs. He didn’t waste any moment to pick it up.
“Hello?”
“Where the fuck were you, man?”, the unmistakable voice was Johnny’s.
“What the hell do you want?”, Benny couldn’t stand a lecture so early on, especially since he didn’t know what to do at your missing presence.
He heard Johnny sigh. “It’s a girl.”
Benny’s throat went dry. “What?”
“Y/N gave birth. It’s a girl.”
A/N: currently on vacation! will edit this once I’m back with full on wifi - hope you enjoyed xx
MASTERLIST PART 4
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yaut-jaknowit · 29 days ago
Note
I’m back to pester you again
Okay so, angst idea (I think i’m a genius) but reader being forced to kill and shoot one of his family members to save his mate because said family member works for the government and was the last thing standing in the way of freeing readers mate
They Both Reached For The Gun
Pairings: Wolf (Male Yautja) x AMAB!Reader
Word Count: 4217
Summary: This was meant to be a simple meeting with your sister. After time and time again, she just doesn't like Wolf. You have tried to get the two of them to at least tolerate each other. This is your family you're talking about. But, your sister won't come to terms with him.
Author Note: Bruh, you are a genius.
Masterlist
Ao3
This was all your fault from the beginning to the end. To the one person you thought you could trust… your sister. She’s been at your side through thick and thin. You encouraged her when she joined the government. A good job with the ability to earn plenty of money. It set her off on the right path. You no longer had to worry about your little sister.
Both of you shared plenty of secrets. Of course, her job prevented information and intelligence to be spilled. But you still talked often.
Such secrets that your mate was opposed at first. You refrained from spilling something like that to her until if or when he gave you permission. To show her the love of your life that you held near and dear to your heart. Someone you’ll defend till your last breath and your heart stops beating. He is yours as much as your are his.
When the day came, you thanked him wildly and showered him in plenty of kisses. As the stoic male that he is, he allows for the affection to rain down on him. That same day, you called up your sister to come visit you at your home. Your shared home with Wolf. She was confused on why you wanted her over so badly but came over anyhow. Anything for her older brother.
All went well during the meeting. Well… for the most part.
When Wolf walked out of the bedroom, your sister, Kara, whipped out a gun and pointed at him. That nearly sent Wolf into a spiral. You stepped out in front of the gun to prevent bloodshed. Wolf was on the verge of tearing Kara’s head from her body for daring to point a weapon at his mate. It took a lot of yelling and talking to get the two of them to calm down finally.
Everything was at a tense peace for the moment. Kara put away the gun you didn’t know she had back into her waistband. You timidly walked up to her with a nervous smile. The woman kept staring at Wolf, eyes wide but not with fear. There was something else you couldn’t pinpoint on.
From that first meeting, everything seemed alright. You would offer for her to come over when Wolf was around. All you wanted was for the two of them to get along. There was no need for fighting or hatred or fear. Wolf wasn’t going to harm her… unless she harmed him or you. Not that she would do that anyhow. This was your sister you were talking about.
Months passed on. The two came to a standstill that was decently peaceful. Despite Kara trying to hide it, you could read her like an open book. She would glance at Wolf when she thought you weren’t looking and gave him disgusted looks. You knew it would be hard to convince her there was nothing wrong with him. He’s different, yes. But, he was an amazing mate. Things like that, you tried to reason with her with.
None of that mattered in her eyes. She shot down your words with the same old ‘he’s a monster’. Words that hurt your soul.
Wolf was far from that. He saved you. He’s the love of your life. You share your soul with him. He deserve the world for what he’s done for you. Here is your sister, saying nasty things about him no matter what you did to explain to her.
Then, you tried one last time to give her a chance. You invited her over for dinner again, making all of her favorites. Anything to sweeten her up.
“It’s not going to work, little one,” Wolf rumbled from his seat at the kitchen island. The seat was barely holding his weight and groaned at each small movement. “She does not like me. I don’t care that she decides I’m the bane of her existence.” He looks up from his wine glass. “I’m only doing this for you. I wish to see you happy. Clearly, her actions aren’t despite what you originally thought.”
The spatula was set down off to the side of the stove. Your hands gripped the edges of the counter, head bowed with the knowledge of defeat. “I know…” you trailed off and shook your head. It was hard to come to terms with the fact your sister doesn’t even tolerate your mate. She hates him. That was clear as day.
You dragged a hand down your face with a groan. Today was the day you were going to give it one more attempt before calling it. If nothing comes out of it, you’ll won’t bring Kara around anymore. There was no point. Not if she brought you down like this and disrespected your family.
“One last time,” you told him with a glance over your shoulder. It was comical how this hunk of a man could perch himself on a stool not strong enough to hold his weight. Yet, the Yautja made it work.
From behind you, the chair made a scrapping noise across the wood floors. The soft, familiar pitter-patter of steps rounded the island. Wolf’s body heat washed over your back as he crowded you into the counter. He leaned down enough so his mouth hovered next to your ear. “Okay, sweetie,” he rumbled and rested his heat on your shoulder. “But then, that’s it. I will not allow her to make you feel terrible about this. It’s not your fault.”
Those words. You needed to hear them. The guilt was eating you up. You weren’t expecting them to be buddy-buddy, but you hoped for some mutual respect. From one family member to the newest one joining. Expect, Kara didn’t even treat him like someone who commanded respect on daily bases by unruly unblooded. There’s a reason he left the teaching academy long ago. He couldn’t deal with children every day like that. A fact you loved to tease him about.
His warmth was comforting. You leaned back and gingerly closed your eyes. “Thank you, love. I appreciate everything you do for me.” Including with dealing with your upset sister whenever she came over. That took a lot out of him.
Wolf grunted and let his hands rest on your hips. The pot of pasta in front of you cooked away, steaming up into the vent over the stove.
A sharp knock on the door alerted you to the appearance of your sister. Wolf growled, hands pinching your waist before he pulled away. You patted his cheek before strolling over to the front door. The Yautja huffed while crossing his arms firmly over his chest. He looked threatening in all of his glory. You gave him a pointed look to calm it down. Wolf just lazily stared at you.
With that fail, you opened the door with a bright smile. Your sister happily greeted you by throwing her arms around your neck and drawing you into a hug. A squeal surged past her lips.
“Oh, it’s so good to see you again!” she cheered and pulled back to get a good look at you. “It feels like forever since I last saw you. How are you doing? Have you dropped any luggage?” Your head jerked back at what she was insinuating. Hurt broke at your already fragile heart about the matter. Her eyes flickered over your shoulder to see the towering form of Wolf still here. “I guess you haven’t.”
Kara strolled into the house with a sneer directed at Wolf. Like the male has dealt with plenty of times, he peers in her direction calmly but as if she wasn’t a threat. Just another annoying child or pest in his way.
“Yum, that smells delicious!” Kara took a deep breath of the air and spun around to face you. You were still standing at the front door, slowly closing it. “What are you making?” You finally follow after her into the living room. She was completely ignoring Wolf. You walked over to him and leaned on the counter next to him.
“Chicken alfredo.” Easily. Simple. But, you made it the best way. Even Wolf liked what you made. You took that as a big compliment since Wolf mainly ate raw meat. Said Yautja purred lightly.
Maybe, it was his favorite at this point as well.
Her brows jumped before falling. “Oh, wow, that’s like the best out there.” The woman took a seat on the couch. “So, do you got anything exciting going on? See our parents? Going out with friends?” You found it slightly weird that she was asking such things. They weren’t normal in your mind but you brushed it off in hopes to keep the conversation light.
A slight shrug answered her. “No, not much. Wolfy here wants to take me out on a hunting trip next weekend. He’s gonna show me how to hunt.” That, you were actually excited about. To see the stars again. He’s taken you out there with his protection at all times. But, this time, to let you go out with him and be taught the Yautja way. God, you couldn’t wait for that.
A look of uncertainty passed over her features. “Are you sure you want to do that? Space seems scary and vast. What happens if you’re alone and a monster comes after you? He can’t always be there to save you,” she disagreed with this trip. Your face dropped with a flash of hurt. “I mean that in a caring way, big bro.”
At your side, Wolf’s aura changed. It grew tense. You didn’t need him to say a word or move a muscle to know what he’s feeling. The two of you are that close. Plus, he freely allows for you to sense that. Otherwise, he’s as closed as a vault.
You shrugged and grasped Wolf’s hand for reassurance. At this point, you were completely regretting this whole interaction with Kara. She seems ten times worse than normal. “I’ve got my partner. He won’t let anything happen to me. Not if he still lives,” you stated firmly and nodded your head. She really needed to get it through her thick skull, Wolf is here to stay.
“And what if he no longer lived? What would you do then?”
The air suddenly turned ice cold. Fear gripped your heart in a steely grasp. Your nails bit into the back of Wolf’s palm, creating crescent shapes in the skin.
Wolf abruptly stood from his chair, easily towering over the woman you once thought so dearly about.
“It’s time you left,” he grounded out and continued to hold your hand. Wolf positioned himself a step ahead of you, shielding you with his body.
From bad to worse, the situation turned for a down hill fall. Her face soured. A hand reached behind her back. “No, I don’t think so. He is my brother, and you are nothing but a monster.” Her eyes found yours. There was something dark in them. “I’ve tried so hard to get you to step away, to break up with him. I didn’t want to hurt you, but you left me no choice, brother. I’ve come to my deadline.”
Everything she was saying, didn’t make sense. You wanted to ask, to beg her for an explanation. Any reason to why she’s acting this way. Wolf didn’t allow for time. He stayed stationed in front of you but let go of your hand. His own were flexed, prepared for whatever Kara throws at him. Something he could else defeat and kill her for.
“W-wait, hold up! Please, don’t,” you begged Wolf and even latched onto his arm. You knew from his words and stories alone; if Kara presented herself as a threat, he had every right to take her down. Your own sister, about to be slaughtered before your very eyes. “This is my sister, Wolf!”
Underneath your grip, Wolf was tense, muscles coiled in preparation of an easily won battle. He does not waver. “Your sister wishes harm on you. She presents a threat to you. I’ve stood off to the side long enough,” he growled out in voice you rarely hear from him.
“Hear that? He’s going to hurt me. You want that? You’re going to let your mate, a monster, hurt your sister.” She played that card really well, pulling at your heart strings. She tried to sway you to her side by playing the victim. “I told you from the beginning: he cannot be loved. They are known for killing and maiming humans. I can’t believe you decided to date such a thing.”
The disgust in her voice hurt a lot.
This wasn’t suppose to be happening. This was the last try to make everyone be content with another. You weren’t going to force them to like each other. Just tolerate. Hopefully tolerate each other.
Then, her last words hit you like a train. You stepped out from behind Wolf. “What? What do you mean?!” Kara is acting as if she knew of his species more than what you told her. “Why are you acting like you know the Yautjas?”
When it came to Wolf, he was up front about everything he’s done. He’s not ashamed. Far from it. He freely let any information you wanted from him. Wolf wasn’t going to hide anything from you. Not when you’ve dedicated your life to him. The least he could do was the same thing.
Wolf used a hand to pull you safety behind him again, despite you fighting him on it. You still peeked around from his back to find your sister’s emotionless, cold eyes.
“I was given a great opportunity when I left a few special people know what you harbor in your basement. You can thank me for not letting them storm your house the moment they knew.” Her arm that was behind her back slid out.
A gun. She was holding a hold.
“I told them to let me study you and him. A great way to see the inside of what makes the two of you tick. Why on God’s green earth would a person go after a murderer?! I still haven’t figured it out.” She lifts the gun, barrel pointed at you. “But, the deadline has come upon us. I’m all out of time.”
A deadly growl pierced the air. Wolf lowers himself down a little, ready to spring across the space for an attack. “Either you willingly give in, beast, or else I’ll have no choice to shoot my own brother. Either way, you are coming with me. In chains or willingly. Make up your mind.”
And that was a threat Wolf would never let stand.
Not even a sound escaped him as he darted forward as blur of moss green. Two shots ring throughout the air, piercing the tension. You didn’t even see what happened even after Wolf tripped over his own feet and slid across the floor. He stopped just shy of her feet, slightly curled up and twitching.
Kara grinned down at him. “We’ve dealt with your kind before. Didn’t you think we had measures to defend ourselves against you?” The barrel aimed down at him. For good measure, your sister shot him again and sent another shot straight through his chest. It wasn’t designed to kill, just stun long enough for extraction. The Yautja grunted and stayed useless at Kara’s feet.
Your jaw dropped, hands shaking at your sides. It felt like you had been taken to a different universe. Surely… surely this had to be a horrible dream.
“Wolf…” you softly whined his name and finally took a step forward to him. Kara snapped the barrel at you. Betrayal was evident in eyes that held loves towards you.
“Not another step, traitor. I’m not afraid to use this on you. Remember, it’s meant to take things like him down,” she warned with a cold tone in her voice. Tears prickled the corner of your eyes.
The distraction you offered allowed for Wolf to swipe his claws at any part close to you. He could’ve purred at the sight of blood staining her pant legs.
She shouted, hand letting go of the gun. It precariously tumbled to the ground and was knocked closer to you. Your eyes darted to it, flickering up towards Kara again before you lunged forward. Kara saw a moment too late and tried to beat you to it. Your hands gripped the unfamiliar warm metal. The barrel trembled as you pointed it at Kara.
The woman put up her hands. “Are you seriously going to shoot your own sister?! I had to do what needed to be done. His kind and himself are responsible for many, many deaths! They need to know we will not let them walk amongst us, not let them walk all over us. We are no longer prey to them!” she reasoned with you. Her looks softened and pulled an innocent look you weren’t taking.
Every word made the crack in your heart worse and worse. You refused to take your eyes off of her, observing her closely. But, you could see the fragile state she had put Wolf in by shooting him. With that knowledge, this gun could be lethal to a human. Now, was the decision on whether or not you were going to kill her.
And she tried to kill your mate.
“Shut the fuck up!” you screamed at her. Rage overtook every emotion in your entire body. Heat raced throughout your veins, filling every available space. “You… I tried with you. So hard. But it was destined from the beginning to fail. You knew. You knew from the near beginning. This was your plan, wasn’t it?”
All the pieces were finally coming together.
At first, she just watched you, face turning darker. She nodded, nevertheless. She knew she was in the wrong.
The dams broke.
It took only a slight pressure for one bullet to release from the chamber. Then, another. Until nothing fired. Until every bullet had left the gun and entered her body. You wanted her dead. She deserved this painful death. Nothing more than the pain she has caused you. It could’ve all been avoided.
Amidst the ringing in your ears, Wolf became your priority. You shakily stepped forward then fell to your knees at his side. The Yautja was heavily trembling, unable to under a word. You were able to get him rolled onto his back to see three entrances to the wounds. The sight made you want to tear Kara’s head straight from her body. But… she was dead. There was nothing more you could do to make her suffer.
You leaned over him. Wolf’s bright eyes snapped to you. His acknowledgement calmed a small portion of your racing heart.
Grunts and choked noises came from him. “S-sh-ship. Go!” Your brows furrowed. As if you were going to leave him to suffer. Over your dead body. “Com-coming. Pe-p-eople.”
The cold wash of fear instantly froze your veins. It only took a second to connect the dots. Your sister was part of the government. She told them. This was a set up. People were coming to take him away. You gritted your teeth and let the rage come back in full force.
“No.”
In total, he had to be at least four hundred pounds without armor. There wasn’t time to either pull out the bullets in hope of stopping whatever they were or hide. Instead, you grabbed a leg and started to tug him towards the backdoor. The backyard offered enough space for him to land his ship.
Wolf could only watch in anger at your blatantly disregard for your own health and safety. Whatever that scum had shot him with worked fast and easily render him useless. If they made it out of this alive, he would immediately go straight to the ancients and let them know. They’ll survive this.
Barely through the night, you could see the outline of his ship. A sight for sore eyes. A place of refuge for now. You began to drag him again; down the steps into the backyard and onto the grass. The alien was heavy, bulk with muscle and dense bones. You strained to even drag him at most thirty yards from where he fell to the ramp of the ship.
It happened when you were reaching down to touch his gauntlet to open the ship’s ramp.
Cars and SUV’s roared into your driveway. You froze for a moment, blaming it on human instinct before pressing the button.
A hiss came from the craft, steam releasing into the air. Then, a slab of metal connected by hydraulics began to reveal the inside of his ship. You nervous shifted from foot to foot all while glancing over your shoulder. There was a loud bang that came from your house. You needed to get inside and close the door. That’s the only way you could be safe.
Nearly all the way down, a shout from behind you startled you. “There! Outside!” They had found you.
“Stop or we will use deadly force,” someone commanded and lead a group of soldiers dressed in all black into the yard. It wasn’t large by any means. Just enough space to enjoy. You scrambled to pull Wolf to safety.
When his body was halfway onto the ramp you slammed a hand into the keyboard attached to a hydraulics. It started the rising process as you continued to pull Wolf into his own craft. It was more than struggle. You were breaking out into a terrible sweat, heart racing in more ways than on. This was nothing other than a life or death situation.
And you were staring death in the face.
Shot echoing throughout the night air. You gasped and ducked out. They hit the metal, tinging off and heading somewhere else. You nearly lost your hold on Wolf and sent him tumbling back towards the ground. Your grasp tightened around his ankle, white knuckling it.
Halfway up, you finally got his body completely inside and felt relief. The two of you were safe now.
Sudden, one of the soldiers flung himself onto the closing ramp. His legs kicked wildly to propel him upwards. He clung to the groves in the metal, trying to crawl inside. But, he made no such luck.
Nothing needed to be done. The ramp continued to close. It stopped when his back hit the top only for the hydraulics to whine, fighting against the wedged person. The solider cried out and slammed his fists against the metal. You watched as he was sheered in half from the ramp.
Numbly, you stood there as the man just laid there at the end of the ramp. Dead. Lifeless. Blood staining the floors everywhere. You had to swallow down the bile in the back of your throat before stumbling your way through the ship. Wolf’s taken you here many times before. You knew the way to the cockpit.
All the gadgets and controls lit up at the press of a button. Life was breathed into the ship. You remembered the process from watching Wolf do this many times before. Each move nearly mirrored his own. It didn’t take more than five seconds to get the engines online. You gripped the joystick and power lever. With some ease, you were able to fed power to the engines and guided the ship into the air.
The original take off was terrible. It was bumpy and unsteady at first until you got yourself into the air. You took it fast, anything to get away from the danger that threatened Wolf.
Once in the safety of space, farther than the moon, you didn’t stop. You were going back to the cargo hold with a med pack you had snatched along the way and falling to Wolf’s side. His breathing was ragged and frightening.
“Shit. Wolf, baby, I’m so sorry,” you sobbed and shakily pulled out a pair of tweezers. The bullets were still inside of him. They had to be removed.
A process that took you longer than you had wish, but three bullets were set off to the side. Wolf was laid out in the cargo hold, taking deep breaths to calm his thundering heart. His entire body ached down to the bone. Whatever those bullets were, they were dangerous weapons against his kind. His first mission was to head straight back to Yautja Prime. He’ll have to take you with him. You couldn’t go back home anymore. A target had been put on your back because of him.
Wolf slowly sat up with a resonating groan. You cupped his cheeks and pulled his head to look him in the eye. “I should’ve known. I-I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have let her come back.” Words spilled from your lips like a dam breaking. You felt incredibly terrible for all the heartaches and pains you put him through. The Yautja leaned into your touch, eyes half closed.
They snapped open. You were surprised when his hands went for your side. When his rough finger pads touched that spot, you jolted away with a gasp. He pulled away enough for you to glance down.
Red painted them.
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luveline · 1 year ago
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hi jade!!! i was wondering if i could request a bassist!remus x roadie!reader fic in which they spend time together on their day off from touring? maybe reader is totally surprised that he even asked her?
hi gorgeous!! modern au, fem 1k
cw vague adult theme, mdni 
"There you are," Remus says, as though he's said it a hundred times before, and he'll say it a hundred times again. "I've been looking for you." 
As a roadie (merchandising, mostly), there's no reason for Remus to know who you are, nor care, but he seems to like you anyhow. And there's nowhere for you to hang out in your downtime beside hotel lobby's or your literal assigned seat in the minivan, so here you are, in your pyjamas, laying on a random lobby couch with a book smushed to your chest. 
"What?" you ask, wiping the sleep from your eyes. 
"I've been looking for you. You weren't in your room." 
"I share my room with three other girls, one who has sleep apnea." The muscles in your back sing like plucked strings as you sit up. "It's quieter here… You're looking for me?" 
"Mm. Come on. We'll go get a late dinner." 
"I'm in my pyjamas." 
Remus gestures down at himself. "I thought you might be." 
He's dressed down too. Every roadie has their thing —it's hard, learning so many names at once, and eventually people begin to typecast one another as their most defining feature. Yours, to your indifference, seems to have become your more comfortable clothing choices. You're not gross, everything's clean, but is everything acceptable attire for going out into the world? 
"No one will even notice they're pyjamas," he assumes you, holding out his hand expectantly. "They look like jogging bottoms." 
"Remus, they're lavender." 
He pulls your hand toward his chest, encouraging you to stand. "They're nice." 
He ferries you out of the hotel, and you thank your lucky stars you wore your converse rather than the hotel slippers. He's clearly thought about this, offering you a hoodie (your size, clearly swiped from the merchandise van, 'marauders' written in jagged lettering across your shoulders like bat wings) as he explains the details of your trip. 
"First we'll get dinner. Then see a film in the cinema, if you want to? They have the new Exorcist." 
"I love horror." 
"I know." He nods to himself. "And then I have to buy you fresh donuts. James says they're the only way to eat them." 
"You don't have to buy me anything." 
"Sorry, I should say it differently. I'd love to buy you fresh donuts. If that's what you want to do." 
You peek at him from the corner of your eye. "I would've stayed in the lobby if I didn't want to come out with you." 
"In that case," he murmurs, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. 
This is worse than flirting. It feels like an initiation, or a turned tide. You smile at him from under his arm and he visibly pauses, falters, before his own smile hooks and he walks forward with a little more purpose. 
The day moves on as promised. You eat a quick dinner at a mid range restaurant before he takes you to the cinema, where he insists he doesn't want any popcorn but eats half of yours anyways. Then he takes you for donuts, and the entire time, you're thinking, what does he want from me? If Remus wanted sex he could fuck a groupie. Half the techs would crawl into bed with him if he asked. Maybe he's just gentlemanly? 
But why would he wanna fuck you? Ignoring any self-esteem issues, you're in cuffed bottoms and bare-faced, and he has no reason to believe you'd be any good in bed. 
He might want something slower, he decides. It's easier to believe when he asks if he can hold your hand on the walk home. 
"What?" you ask, sure you heard him wrong. 
"Can I?" he says, offering you his palm. 
It's different from his pulling earlier. You give him your hand and he squeezes his fingers between yours slowly, as though savouring the feeling.
You shake your head. "Was this…" 
Remus waits for you to finish. It's hard to ask under the weight of his gaze, happy but with that air of knowing you can't quite crack. He always seems so put together, even when he's asking for things, like any answer you give is one he's prepared for. 
"Was this a date?" you force out. 
"That depends. Did it go well?" 
"I would've said yes, if you asked me." 
Remus leans in like he's telling a secret, his voice hushed to match. "I know," he says gently, the tiniest hint of smugness threaded in the slight scratch of his voice. "That's mostly why I didn't ask." 
"Mostly?" 
"I couldn't face rejection. Not from you." His eyes light with an emotion you can't name. "But if you still want to reject me, I'll cope. It might be good for me, actually, it'll give me some material. Nothing makes for better music than losing a pretty girl." 
You fluster at his wording. "I would've worn something nice," you say apologetically. "If I'd known. I would've made an effort to look nice." 
"You always look nice. You think I'm put off by your pyjamas?" 
"Stop," you mumble, mortification creeping in. I can't believe I just went on a date with a rockstar in my pyjamas. 
"It's cute. You're cute, I love that you can fall asleep anywhere–" 
"Stop!" 
Remus laughs and pulls you that last inch into his side, elbow to elbow, hip to hip. "I can't. Teasing you is half the fun. It's why I haven't mentioned the powdered sugar on your lip." 
You sigh and turn your face away from him, wiping your lip with your sleeve. "You always do this." 
"Don't wipe it off, I'll get it. It'll taste sweet." 
You take your hand out of his. "Did you want this to be a date? I'll change my mind." 
He's kinder after that, and when he rubs your shoulder like he knows you need it, you almost pass out. 
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iambilliejeanok · 11 months ago
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I feel like itachi feeds his s/o so good
And his cooking is like delicious
Okay I’m making this a request thanks🫶🏾
Warnings:18+, fluff, mentions of sex.
Coming home from work to indulge in your mans cooking.
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He looks forward to it, smiling to himself in the comfort of the kitchen of your shared home after a short conversation over the phone with you.
You’re getting ready to knock off of work and he’s already rolling up his sleeves, opening the last drawer to pull out his favourite apron. It’s black with the words “butter my buns” written in bold red letters, small flames on each end of the phrase. You got it for him on his last birthday, and he thought it was funny and loved the denim material of it. It was perfect to his tastes and used it every opportunity he had. The two of you might of gotten down a few times with him still wearing it, with you butt naked of course, against the shelves in the pantry, the memories of your frequent mischievous adventures in the little room warming up his cheeks as he walks out of the pantry with a box of spaghetti, a can of peeled tomatoes, some seasonings and a few other things. He tries to move fast, carefully carrying all the ingredients in his arms, placing them down on the counter. Your commute back home would normally take you around 25 minutes if you didn’t stop to grab anything on the way way home and in those 25 minutes, he needed his meal to be hot and ready for you to eat.
He focused diligently on the task at hand, allowing his thoughts to drift to you every now and then. He looked forward to you coming home every evening, and for some reason, found himself feeling rather excited for you to fill yourself with whatever meal he prepared for you. He genuinely loves cooking. He always had, ever since he was just a child, still cooking the best meals for his younger brother, which you knew nothing of, nevertheless, you still felt somewhat lucky to have delicious meals prepared for you everyday by none other than Uchiha Itachi.
He loves that you have such an adventurous palette and that you scarf down everything he serves you, indulging in his cooking with moans and groans over every mouthful. You flatter him this way without fail, Itachi catching himself smiling again while he went to work on the sauce, adding every ingredient to thoughts of you, playing over and over again in his head, scenarios of how you’d walk into the house and he’d be ready to embrace you, and help you place whatever you walked in with away before the two of you attacked each other with hugs and kisses that he wished would last forever…but he was content with every moment anyhow, dumping the drained spaghetti into the sauce while eyeing the time. You’d be in here any minute now, Itachi growing warmer by the minute, feeling slightly anxious that you’d walk in before he could plate up the food, he takes this kind of stuff very seriously you know.
Wiping away the sweat that lightly drenched his forehead with the back of his hand, he heard the door open. He didn’t waste another second, speed walking to the foyer to welcome you. “Hey” His voice was so deep and smooth, the red words on his apron grabbing your attention, the memories making you blush for a second, which he noticed, standing there with his bare feet in some cozy, fluffy slippers, black jeans, a black shirt and his hair tied up into a bun at the top of his head, a few strands hanging down his face and a gentle smile plastered on his face as he neared you in a few slow steps. “Hey”, you squeaked. He looked incredibly sexy right now, something you found yourself battling to overlook since the first time you came home to him. And suddenly, you felt that familiar arousal slowly building up in your tummy and between your legs. You felt hungry too, your tummy grumbling as soon as you got a whiff of that wonderful aroma coming from the kitchen. “I hope you’re hungry, dinners already served” He spoke as he cupped both of your cheeks in the palms of his hands, tilting you face towards his as he leaned down to kiss you, the soft feel of your lips melting in between his somewhat sating the hunger he’d manage to keep well suppressed until this very moment, immediately breaking the kiss when he heard you moan ever so softly. He wanted to restrain himself for just a little longer. He still needed you to eat. “Come lets go”, he said, leaving you breathless as he dragged you by the hand into the kitchen, pulling out the chair underneath the counter, lifting you up to help you sit, making you giggle like a child.
You were so cute, he was happy he had something prepared to fill your grumbling tummy, placing a mat down in front of you before putting you plate on top of it. “Eat up babe, don’t wait for it to get cold” . He opened the fridge to retrieve a tall jug of lemon water, and you snuck a look at his ass, Itachi catching you as he turned around. You quickly looked down at your plate, feeling slightly embarrassed as you reached for your fork. “Come sit with me pleasssee”, you asked. “One second” Itachi said, finally sitting down on the chair beside you, placing two glasses down and planting a kiss on your head. “How did you know I wanted spaghetti tonight?”, you asked, twirling some on your spoon, ready for a mouthful of warmth and delight. He dug into his food next to you, the excitement for you to try his food never dying down, even in this moment. “Maybe I read your mind”, he teased, but you blushed, wondering if he read all the other stuff you hand in mind for the evening, his big dark eyes making you feel hot. You quickly stared down at your food, stuffing you face with the first bite, a soft moan slipping from your throat, the taste of the delicious ingredients gracing your mouth, unable to resist shoving more into your mouth. “And of course I’ll eat you out right here as soon as I clean up the table”, he casually mentioned and you nearly chocked on your food.
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notjustjavierpena · 1 year ago
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Oops, I accidentally sent the request before actually typing it, lol
Here we go again:
The family is away for summer vacation and reader bumps into an old high school boyfriend of hers at the beach while Javi is playing with the kids (making an adorable mess with sand castles), and he sees it at some distance and get super jealous about it, but only get to talk to her about it after dinner when the kids are asleep in their hotel room. Idk, something about that with obviously make up sex for reader to show him how much she’s all his and etc
Random thoughts, I know, but I’m sure you’ll be able to work magic with this
Sand
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Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost | Support a disabled creator
A/N: Hi hi hi, and so sorry for the wait. I hope this fulfils your heart’s desires, my friend. Thank you for following my work ❤️
Summary: You bump into your high school sweetheart on holiday and Javier is not a fan.
Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader (no y/n)
Tags: +18 smut, jealousy, javi is whipped for reader, dirty talk, piv sex, rough sex, bit of roleplay, creampie, use of papi, possessiveness, aren’t they just the cutest?
Word count: 3.1k
Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51262198
Sand
Children’s laughter travels through the air to meet your ears along with the sound of a soft summer breeze, making you put down the book that you’ve been holding in your hands. It’s impossibly sunny hence why you’ve decided to hold up the book, shielding its pages from the rays, and the skin of your back glistens with sweat. There are seagulls in the air, busy noises from families around you, and the therapeutic push and pull of the waves.
Beside you, you have a glass of strawberry lemonade and in front of you, you have a view of your husband enthusiastically digging moats around the various sandcastles that have been scattered across your chosen spot on the beach. You feel refreshed and relaxed; just how you’re supposed to feel on your vacation during the hottest days of summer. 
It had been Javier’s idea to go away for a week to your hometown. You are thankful for his suggestion because you would never have voiced your wish for a break out loud yet he had sensed it despite your silence. 
You’ve visited your parents, yes, but the majority of days have been spent on the beach where you’ve gotten some quality time with yourself. Javier has managed to tire out both of your kids with endless activities, and the evenings have been filled with long, slow kisses on the hotel room balcony. You have hoped for more but a shared hotel room means that you will have to keep everything PG-13.
“Look, Mommy!” 
Your thoughts are interrupted by Inés’ excited shout. She has placed seashells on the biggest of the sandcastles’ walls, making them imitate grand windows. 
“They’re beautiful, baby,” you praise adoringly. 
Lucas is by the shore with a bucket, filling it with water for the moats. He beams at you when he returns, and you smile right back at your beautiful boy. 
“Remind Papá to take a picture of you when you’re finished,” you say loudly for Javier to hear as well. He looks back at you, grinning with genuine joy and happiness but you’re too busy staring at his happy trail just above the hem of his bathing shorts. He notices.
“What’re you looking at?” He winks.
“Nothing,” you say back and shoo him, holding up your book for show, “Go keep an eye on your offspring, Dad. I’m very busy.”
The day continues. You manage to go through a few more chapters, occasionally watching Javier over the top of your book as he is enjoying himself. 
And then it is late afternoon but the sun is nowhere near descending yet. You are interrupted in your reading by a shadow above you, and you don’t manage to catch yourself as you automatically tell Javier off, “Honey. You’re standing right in front of the great big reading lamp in the sky.”
The shadow laughs and then you realize it isn’t your husband. You look up to stare at a familiar face anyhow, and your face grows hot. With quick motions, you put your book down and push yourself to stand.
“Jonathan!” You exclaim in what you hope is a calm and collected voice. You know it is a possibility, being in your hometown, that you run into your high school ex-boyfriend but it still catches you off guard. 
“You mean ‘honey’ right?” Jonathan jokes. You laugh politely and awkwardly, and despite the ring on his finger, Jonathan doesn’t seem to back down. He hugs you, splaying his large palm on your back - right under where your bikini top sits. 
Afterward, he gives you a once over with his eyes, and out of the corner of your eye, you spot Javier glancing in your direction. 
“God, you look well,” Jonathan continues, “Still in Laredo?”
“Still in Laredo,” you confirm, curling your toes into the warm sand. Jonathan looks almost exactly the same; blond, wide-eyed, and pale. He still sports a t-shirt with a print of a ‘70s band logo on the front that you remember him buying when it was cool. 
You realize that you haven’t done anything to make conversation, quickly adding, “And you? You haven’t aged a day.”
“Never escaped, teachin’ at our old school,” he shrugs. He eyes Inés and Lucas but only briefly, turning back to you when he realizes that you are here with a man too. Javier is throwing daggers his way but for once, he has no intention of interrupting which is fair since he would have to leave his children unattended for the time it took to play macho. 
“Course you are,” you smile genuinely. It suits him perfectly to be one of the people who keep the cycle of the quiet town alive, even if it is by simply replacing your old teachers, “And the ring? I couldn’t help but notice that we’re both married.”
Jonathan tells you briefly about his wife and kids. You don’t actually care, but he lights up as he speaks about his two daughters and that’s the most important thing in this whole conversation. He has a dreamy look in his eyes as he finishes, “And to think we thought it would be us.”
By instinct, you reach out to touch his arm and then you giggle softly because the image of the two of you getting old together is absurd. You have everything you need in Javier Peña… Who is fuming without you noticing.
You hug Jonathan goodbye and the rest of the afternoon is suspiciously quiet. 
*
Inés and Lucas fall asleep quickly, exhausted from the amount of fresh air they’ve breathed in today. Outside the sky is turning rose-colored from the evening catching up on you; the sunset will be long and beautiful. But you don’t want beauty with how much tension is between the two of you. 
You are brushing your teeth side-by-side in the hotel bathroom. It’s been a tight-lipped dinner. You honestly just want to go to sleep so you can start over tomorrow. 
Javier finishes brushing his teeth first. He waits for you, looking like someone who is contemplating whether to say something or not.
You finish brushing your own teeth just as he finally makes a decision, off-handedly throwing a remark at you.
“You sure were friendly with Jonathan earlier,” he says simply.
You let out a long sigh, stepping away from the sink after putting away your toothbrush, “Jesus, Javi, I knew this would happen.”
“What?” He leans against the sink.
“You don’t have to act like a fucking… I don’t know. It is every damn time a guy even looks at me - and it’s just not very attractive,” you are exhausted. 
“Excuse me for liking you to myself,” he looks away, “I like having you alone.”
You decide on something at that moment. 
“You already have me. Don’t you know?” You ask in a voice close to a purr. Javier raises a brow in annoyance, but you don’t give in to a fight so easily. Instead, you go to close and lock the bathroom door.
“Know what?” He asks impatiently.
“That you’re the only one?” You watch him standing against the sink counter. He doesn’t look as annoyed after those words but he still isn’t overly impressed with your actions earlier. There’s no way that he doesn’t know what clicking the lock means though. If only he knew the power you have over him, the power that you’re soon to make a display of. 
You cross the room to stand in front of him. You tilt your chin upwards to look up at his face but his eyes stray from yours the second you catch them. He can get so pissy sometimes, a part of the game, but you’ll take the challenge especially when you haven’t had his cock inside of you for a week. At this point, your core aches for him. 
Gently, you put two fingers under his chin and pull it down towards his chest so he is forced to look at you. Your smile is sweet as honey, “Thoughts of you keep me up all night sometimes. Hot and bothered, legs barely knowing what to do.”
There’s a pause where you can only hear his breathing matching yours. His pupils have blown wider, signaling desire for you. 
“What do you think of?” He finally gives in. 
“I think about all the ways you turn me on,” you tap his chin but then let your hand go down. It skims down his bare chest and over each ripple of muscle that quivers with each touch. 
“Yeah?” He murmurs. His eyes flick down between the two of you for less than a second when your hand hovers over his happy trail. The second you catch him doing it, your own eyes follow suit. It’s too hot to wear his usual pajama bottoms, so it’s so easy to spot that he is hard already, showing off the outline of his dick in his gray briefs. There’s a stain of precome. 
“Yeah, baby,” you don’t even hesitate, reaching down to palm the length of him. His breath hitches in his throat the second he is touched, and your voice lowers to a whisper, “All I do is fantasize about you. The way you kiss, the way you touch me, and mmm, the way you fuck me.”
“Mhm,” he hums softly in the way men do when they don’t really know what to say during their current state of mind. You have him scatterbrained with your touch, a moan falling from his lips and replacing the hum when you snake your hand into his underwear, wrapping your fingers around his cock to stroke him lazily. 
“You like this?” You ask but don’t give him time to answer since you tighten your fist around his girth. He forces a nod and you lean up to kiss his lips teasingly soft, “You really think I would ever touch another man like this? There’s no way. No comparison to how you look when I do it.”
“Go on and I might forgive the eyes you were sending him,” he tells you with a hint of edge in his voice. He sounds more desperate than confident, more wanting than he might want to let on. It fills you with self-satisfaction because you know that what you are saying about him goes for you too; you’ve ruined everyone else for each other. 
“I told you I was doing no such thing,” you reply. He pulses in your hand, precome sliding down over your knuckles when you make your fist a tighter fit, reminding him of what waits between your legs. You go a little faster, and Javier’s breathing speeds up. 
“Liar,” he challenges raggedly. 
“As if he could ever make me come as hard as you,” you egg him on, patiently waiting for him to lose control with you, “There’s only you, Papí.”
That seems to do something. Javier yanks your hand away, and you know the strength behind the action because he breathes the same way that he breathes when teetering on the edge of release. He has stopped himself but it’s only to enter your personal space more than you even thought possible.
He grabs at your hips almost violently, steers you backwards a few paces so he can flip the positions. Now, you are the one against the sink counter and it gnaws painfully into the small of your back. There’s an air of consideration for a moment as he checks in on you during the beginning of what can be regarded as playing with each other. You give him a dirty look, a small nod and he smirks back.
“Javi,” you mumble in fake confusion, reaching up to put your hands on his chest but you don’t get to do much because one of Javier’s hands comes up to catch one wrist after the other. It’s so easy for him to do, both because of his job and his physical superiority. 
He twists your hands behind your back and roughly shoves you down over the sink. He lowers his voice as he speaks, “You’re not gonna wake up anyone, are we clear?” 
“We’re clear,” you promise, finding his eyes in the mirror. If he touches you now, he’ll find you wetter than you have been in a long while. What is it about holidays and hotel rooms? Mixed with not having been able to touch each other since you have arrived here, it is a dangerous combination. 
“Te deseo mucho, amor,” he says softly and out of character. 
“I love you,” you reply. 
He dives back into the scenario. His other hand tugs at your cotton shorts, dragging them over the curve of your ass and down your long legs. You step out of them as soon as they lay around your feet. 
“I’m gonna let go,” he says and shakes your hands in his grip to indicate what he is talking about, “But only so you can cover your mouth for me and I can get out of these fucking underpants.”
He does as he said he would. You move to prop yourself up on your elbows, neck already having strained from the mere moments you’ve had to feel the cold porcelain against your chest.
Behind you, there’s shuffling. You cover your mouth as he enters you swiftly, jerking forward at the intrusion that has you panting damply into your palm. He fills you to the brim, stretches your cunt as only he can, and then he fucks you - hard, rough, and fast.
Your head spins, your knees bang against the cabinet’s front, and you try to strain the muscles in your legs so they don’t. He knows the ticking bomb that is your children sleeping soundly in the room next door, but he cannot help himself as he drives into you. He leans over you. 
“No one but me,” he growls lowly, “This little cunt belongs to no one else. She gets red and puffy for me, no? Filled up with only my come.”
“Sí,” you practically sing out but then quickly cover your mouth. He gets rougher with you then, each snap of his hips a reminder of how only he can make you feel like this. He is getting exactly what he wants, and he has you a moaning mess soon after. 
Your first orgasm tears through you after a rough pounding of your g-spot, sending shockwaves down your spine to burn at the base and throwing your upper body forward with such a force that you nearly lose touch with the floor, standing only on your toes as you clamp rhythmically down on Javier’s cock.
“That’s it,” he praises quietly, not relenting, “You can do one more, can’t you? Gotta remind you who makes you feel this good.” 
You nod through sobs. More, more, more.
Suddenly, he leaves you empty. The feeling has you on edge, makes you look at him over your shoulder because gaining eye contact in the mirror is somehow not good enough for the look of betrayal you want to give him. He takes a step back from you whilst panting frantically, gesturing to you by drawing a circle in the air, “Turn around.”
You straighten without thinking and flip around, so you are positioned as you were at the beginning of this. He seizes your hips, hands going down your thighs to grab at them and lift you up onto the edge of the counter. 
Your hand clasps around the back of his neck. He lifts your legs up to settle them around his waist, and then he guides himself back into you and continues fucking you with a force that has you lifting your free hand up behind you to brace yourself against the mirror. 
“Javi,” you whimper repeatedly, clutching at the curls at the base of his skull. He had wanted to cut it before summer came, but you are so glad that he did not. 
“Shh,” he soothes your growing cries and you know that he’ll make you come again soon, “Be quiet for me, baby.”
You don’t think he is quiet enough himself to demand such a thing from you. His stamina has always impressed you, but it’s the sound of his breaths that tears your own from your chest. Alongside the hungry eyes that bore into you, you don’t think that it’ll take long for this to reach its peak for both of you.
“I can’t,” you stutter a little more high-pitched than you intended.
“You have to,” he says with a hint of sternness but he cannot keep it up. Especially not, when he has to take the consequences of reaching down between your legs to thumb at your clit. 
You come so fast that you don’t even have time to warn him, and you cry. So loudly that he needs to kiss you to swallow the sound of you reaching your second, over-sensitive high. 
You throw your arms around him as he chases his own peak, whimpering at the hard thrusts he is giving you to reach his end. You hear him let out a drawn-out fuuuck as he spills inside of you. He pulses, settling deep inside you. He kisses you lazily. 
Everything goes quiet except for your shared breathing. You want to say something to finish the argument that almost never took place but a knock is heard on the locked bathroom door.
You freeze. Javier pulls out of you. The bathroom counter is a mess. 
“Mommy?” Inés’ little voice sounds anxious. You figure that it’s far from nice to find your parents’ bed empty on holiday.
“Just a second,” you say with a weak voice. 
“We’ll be right there, mí vida,” Javier says as well.
“What are you doing? Why is Mommy crying?” You hear her ask and Javier’s face twists in surprise for a moment before he starts laughing, burying his head in your neck as he holds you close. You slap his shoulder. 
“I’m not crying, baby,” you reassure. With a glare that’s anything but actually angry, you push Javier away from you to get cleaned up. 
“I have to pee,” Inés continues with a hesitant tone to her voice. 
Javier kisses you one last time, and you draw it out for a few more seconds than you have time for. It’s still romantic despite you holding a hotel towel between your legs. 
“One moment, mija,” Javier says and gets dressed in his briefs. He waits for you to dress too.
When you walk towards the door, he smacks your ass and you whip around to slap his hand away. There’s a grin on your face though, “Dog.”
“Go to bed, I’ll take her,” he just says.
.
.
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Hi :) I was wondering if you could do Poly Dallas and sodapop hcs? with a reader if you're comfortable with it, of course. I think it would be a funny dynamic
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This was written in my anatomy class (can you tell that I don’t pay attention in anatomy?) so I’m gonna give @a-person-who-didn’t-want-to-be-here a big huge thank you for helping me out <4
Anyway!
There’s a really complicated getting together story here? I just haven’t figured it out quite yet, so I’m gonna leave that to you guys to think up cause there’s a few ideas swirling around my head, I just haven’t nailed anything down because I’m really not in love with any of my thoughts
But you’ve got the best of both worlds going on for you! A nice golden retriever boyfriend and a boyfriend who’s more of a german shepherd/rottweiler/doberman type-
Life is good!
Both of these boys run warm and they can both be very very handsy, made worse by the fact that they are both very very much in love with you
Jealousy is sort of wonky here? Cause Dally’s very loudly jealous, but Sodapop’s jealousy comes off as him acting more closed-off and withdrawn, he just kinda pulls away when you hang too much with Dallas
Also, before we get any further along, Sandy and Sylvia don’t exist here because I’m in charge and I make the rules :)
Parties! You’re always being dragged out to parties, whether it’s a drag race and you’re on Sodapop’s arm, or a late night party at Buck’s bar where Dally keeps you tucked to his side all night long
You’ve got the whole freaking gang honestly, the whole crew wrapped around your finger-
Dating Dally gets you Johnny in an instant, dating Sodapop gets you Pony, Dare, and Steve- the only one left is Two-Bit but ya know, he’s a good enough guy, he’s probably on your side in all this anyhow-
You’re at the DX a lot, just hanging around the pumps and the garage and the register while Soda’s at work (you definitely skip school to go see him, Dally picks you up and you guys waste the day over at the gas station)
Sodapop sneaking out to meet you and Dally down at Buck’s because there’s a party tonight and honestly he doesn’t care if Darry kills him for being at the Merrill’s establishment, he hasn’t seen you all week long-
Of course of course, you’re wearing Dally’s ring and when you and Sodapop are holding hands, he likes to twist it around your finger and fiddle with it
Dally asks him what he’s doing, asks if Sodapop’s trying to take it off as if he’s got some sort of problem with you wearing somebody else’s ring but Soda just kinda shrugs and says he likes fooling with it
Baby boy’s got no problem other than ADHD and he likes to mess with things 🤷
Patching them up after a rumble is such an obnoxious task- Dally’s whining about broken ribs and how he can barely breath and Soda’s slouched on the floor, holding an ice pack to his face and asking if you’ll still love him if he’s got a black eye
Suggestion? Try and keep them close together in this situation ^^ make them sit near each other, because they both want attention and if you’ve got to run back and forth across the living room every two seconds, no one’s going to be happy-
You spend a lot of time sitting in Dallas’ lap and you spend a lot of time holding Soda’s hand, sometimes these happen at the same time-
Imma say it, you’re not sharing a bed with both of them unless you’re hurt or sick because both of these boys are like portable space heaters and no matter how cold you may be, these human furnaces will make you feel like you’re being slowly cooked because they sandwich you between them
PET NAMES PET NAMES PET NAMES
Doll, baby, honey, sugar, sweetheart, babe….
Just…you’re gonna forget you actually have a name because they never call you by your actual name-
You’re dating two highschool dropouts, how do you feel about that?
Joking, joking, I know you feel wonderful, as you should, because you’re going with two great guys!!
There’s like?
A betting pool going around?
Because no one can figure out who you’re going out with (other than the gang of course)
And Sodapop and Dallas do nothing to help you out- they purposefully make it even worse-
You go to a party with Sodapop, hanging off his arm, and at the end of the night, you’re going home with Dally, spending your night in his room at Buck’s
You’re sitting on the DX counter (you don’t even work there but you have free reign of the place, let’s be real) and you’ve got Dally’s medal around your neck, Dal himself is off in reform and you and Sodapop are planning a date <3
One night, you get caught kissing Dallas, tongues down each others’ throats and all that jazz, and the next thing everyone else knows, you’re walking with Sodapop and he’s got a hand in your pocket
Everyone is town is anxiously awaiting the day that the boys figure out you’re two-timing them because surely, Dallas Winston isn’t going to stand for you messing around on him
But ya know, nothing ever happens, even when people try and get Sodapop and Dallas to see what’s going-
With Soda, they’ll point out Dally and you sitting at a diner booth together, asking him what’s going on, cause weren’t you guys going steady?
And Dal, they’ll ask him where you are when you’re not at Buck’s, mentioning casually that you’ve been hanging out around the DX an awful lot-
With Male!Readers?
You guys are labeled just as good friends all the time and it makes it a lot easier to lie about why you guys are together all the time (curse you time-period realistic homophobia *shakes my fist at the sky*)
I would loveeeeee to do a male!reader piece for this topic, just saying guys-
This….really got away from me-
Sorry for making this so long guys-
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supernaturalgirl20 · 2 years ago
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Hey! Your writing is stellar!
Could you possibly write about Joel and reader hating each others guts, but something like Joel almost dying brings the feelings out reader never realized. (Like angsty almost dying lol). she takes care of him and he sees how he does actually love her. It’s ends with them together. Vague i know haha.
Thank you!! xoxo
Thank you so much and I adored this request 🥰changed it up a little Hope you enjoy 😉
The Reason
Pairings: Joel Miller x f!reader
Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, soft love making, near fatal accident, mentions of death, hidden feelings, enemies to lovers (sorta), angst, cursing, fluff.
A/N: slowly getting back to writing this week so please bear with me on the requests. Didn't edit this so sorry for any mistakes.
Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰
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Anger bubbled under the surface of your skin as you stood with your back against the door of the stables. The sound of his voice echoed through the air as he berated Tommy for asking you to join them. 
Who does he think he is? You think to yourself as you listen to him criticise you to his brother. Joel Miller was a force to be reckoned with and he had zero tolerance for anyone in the Jackson community except for you. Or at least you’d thought so, now you weren’t so sure. 
There was one night after a rough patrol where he’d shared a few drinks with you, and he’d opened up about his past. You had thought for a moment that maybe he liked you. Maybe you both could become friends or more, but now, you’re sure he hates you. 
“Now why the hell did you go and ask her to come with us? You know darn well that I ain’t gonna be able to concentrate with her there. Damn it, Tommy, I ain’t gonna be able to keep them both safe.”
With clenched fists you turned the corner and stormed towards him, his eyes widening when he spots you. “Who the hell do you think you are, Miller? Huh? Telling Tommy you don’t want me to come. It doesn't matter what you want, I’m the most experienced shot this place has so I’m more than capable of taking care of myself. Now I’m coming on this run whether you like it or not.” You huffed out a breath as you poked his chest with your finger, looking up at him with an angry expression on your face. 
“So, saddle up, cowboy.” You push him back slightly before grabbing your horse and marching out of the stables, leaving both Miller brothers confused as they stared after you. 
“About time you grew a pair Joel and told her the truth about how you feel. Save all this bickering. I mean it’s obvious as shit that you have feelings for her, so just man the fuck up.” Tommy says as he pats him on the back. 
Ellie scoffs behind them drawing both of their attention to her. She looks up and shrugs her shoulders at them. “Gotta say I agree with Tommy on this one. Life would be a lot easier if you just told her. Hell, it’s so fucking obvious she feels the same and I swear you two are just like horny fucking teenagers.”
“Alright enough! First of all, language,” he snaps as he points a finger in Ellie’s direction. “Secondly, what is this anyhow? Gang up on Joel day?” His gaze drifts between the pair and they smile at each other before they shrug, and Tommy says his goodbyes. 
“Alright, let’s get this shit show on the road,” Ellie teases as she winks at Joel and follows you outside. 
Joel watches her leave, his hands resting on his hips as he closes his eyes briefly and takes in a deep breath. This was gonna be a long trip. 
***
Things had gone to shit when you came across a group of raiders in a nearby abandoned town. They had wanted all of your supplies as well as you and Ellie but Joel was having none of it. 
He’d become a different man in the blink of an eye. A violent one and you can’t say it didn’t turn you on. He’d killed them all or at least so you’d thought until one of them had snuck up behind him and tackled him to the ground. 
They tussled for a moment before Joel straddled him and beat him to the ground. When he stood, he turned around to face you, his breathing ragged as he flexed his hands, his knuckles were bruised and bloody. His gaze drifted away from you towards Ellie who was busy collecting weapons. 
You let your gaze drift down his torso, and you gasped at the sight of a knife protruding from his abdomen. 
“Joel!” The sound of your worried voice catches his attention and his gaze flickers towards you. He follows your line of sight and groans when he sees the knife. His hand wraps around the hilt and pulls, blood spurting out from the wound, and he stumbles slightly as he throws the knife into the ground. 
“Let’s go.” His voice is commanding, leaving no room for argument. “Ellie,” you shout, “we gotta go.” You tilt your head towards her horse and rush over to help Joel up onto your own, placing him at the front. 
“Joel’s been hurt. We gotta find somewhere to lay low for a while.” You jump up behind Joel wrapping your arms around his waist as you grab the reins. 
You travel at a slow pace. Trying hard not to jostle him around too much but he’s losing a lot of blood, and fast. His head droops to the side, then his whole-body leans to the right and you try to catch him but you can’t hold his weight so he falls off the horse. 
“Ellie, stop!” you shout as you hop off the horse and check on him. He’s passed out. It almost appears as if he’s dead, but you run your fingers along his neck and check for a pulse. 
It’s there. 
Faint, but there and you let out a sigh of relief. Turning your gaze to Ellie you see the unshed tears in her eyes as she stares down at Joel. “He’s gonna be ok. I need you to help me lift him back onto the horse. Those houses over there,” you say with a tilt of your head. 
“We’ll stop there for now. Try to close over his wound.” She nods at you before helping you lift him. It’s a struggle but you manage all the same and you take a hold of the reins as you guide the horse along the trail. A silent prayer recited in your head that he’d be ok, that he’d make it through this. 
***
Joel is laying on the mattress you’d found as Ellie rips off a piece of cloth to hold over his wound. He groans loudly and you drop to your knees beside him pushing Ellie out of the way and putting pressure on his abdomen. He writhes in pain for a moment before he grabs your hand. 
“Leave.” He rasps, his breathing becoming more laboured with each breath. You shake your head as you continue to put pressure on the wound. 
“Leave. Go north…. Tommy,” his grip on your hand tightens and you finally meet his gaze. “No. I’m not leaving you. Don’t - don’t ask that of me…. I can’t.”
His skin is clammy and pale, and your heart feels like it’s being ripped apart. You can’t lose him. Not now. 
“Ellie.” Your gaze drifts towards the teenager and she’s standing still, face full of worry as she stares down at Joel. “Ellie,” you shout, grabbing her attention. 
“You need to go and look for medical supplies. Bandages, gauze, needle and thread, anything. Now, Ellie.”
She looks down at Joel one last time before she rushes up the stairs. He groans again, his eyes full of pain as he stares up at you shivering. 
You pull his jacket up over him before cupping his cheek in your hand. “You’re gonna make it through this. I promise.”
You stand up and quickly move across the room to grab your bag, rifling through it until you find what you're looking for. Pills in hand you pull out a bottle of water and drop to your knees again.
Gently, you lift his head and place the tablets in his mouth before bringing the bottle of water to his lips. “Drink. These will help with the pain.”
He obeys with a groan, swallowing the pills before you rest his head back on the mattress. “I gotta clean this, Joel. I’m gonna…. I gotta clean the wound, ok?”
He nods his head, his body trembling as he shivers uncontrollably. You pop open the bottle of alcohol and take a deep breath before you remove the jacket and lift his shirt. 
Your hand shakes slightly as you stare at his stomach for a moment - the wound bloody and bruised and jagged looking - before you snap out of it and pour the alcohol over it, causing him to hiss in pain. 
“I know, I know…. I’m sorry.” You turn your head at the sound of Ellie’s footsteps coming down the stairs. “I found this,” she says as she hands you a needle and thread. Her eyes widen at the sight of his stomach, and you cradle her cheek in your hand. 
“He’s gonna be ok. I promise you. Now I need you to hold him down because this is gonna hurt like hell.” She nods her head and rushes around to kneel beside Joel, placing her hands on his shoulders. 
His eyes stare up at her and he gives her a faint smile before his gaze drifts to you again. You pull the thread through the needle and tie it off before sterilising it with the alcohol. You meet his gaze and nod before taking a deep breath and pushing the needle through his skin. 
He groans loudly, reaching his hand up to grab at your arm. He turns his head away from you, shutting his eyes tightly as he tries to hold in his cries, Ellie pushing down on him to stop him from moving. 
The needle falls to the floor once you’ve finished sewing him up and you sit back on the ground staring at your shaking hands. They were covered in blood. His blood and the fact that you could’ve lost him today stirs something inside you. 
Feelings that you didn’t think you had. Not for him. Sure, you thought he was handsome, that he was a good father to Ellie, but he hated you. So, you hated him. At least, that’s what you tried to convince yourself. 
It was all too much. These feelings, and the way he was looking up at you made your chest hurt. Standing, you rush up the stairs and out of the house, trying to take deep breaths. 
“He is asking for you.” Ellie’s voice startles you and you whip your head around taking her in. 
“I’m just gonna check the other houses for medicine. I’ll be back.” She takes a step forward but you shake your head. “I just need a minute, ok? Tell him I’ll be back.”
***
You’d taken your time, routing through the other abandoned houses trying to stall time as best as you could until you sort through your feelings. 
It became clear around the fifth house that you had maybe always loved Joel Miller, you were just too stubborn to notice. It was also in that house you’d found some penicillin. 
The creak of the stairs alerted Ellie to your presence, and she turned quickly, gun pointed in your direction. With a sigh of relief, she lowered it and stood, taking a glance at Joel before meeting you. 
“He was worried about you. Tried to go after you but I wouldn’t let him. He’s asleep now but he keeps shaking and I think he has a slight fever.” 
With a nod of your head, you brush a strand of her hair behind her ear. “There’s some canned food in the kitchen, you should head on up and get something to eat. We’re gonna be here for a while.”
“Ok, I’m starving. Want me to get you some?” 
“I’m ok for now. Just don’t make too much noise. We don’t know if there are others in the area.” You let her go and turn your attention to Joel, who is laying in the same spot, shivering despite the heavy coat and blanket covering him. 
You run your fingers through his hair, and he groans at the feeling of your touch. Pulling away you reach for the bottled water and grab one of the antibiotics before gently stirring him awake. 
“Hmm,” he groans as his eyes slowly open, glossed over in pain as you smile softly down at him. “Hey, I’ve got some antibiotics. They should kill any infection even if they are out of date.”
Joel lifts his head enough for you to place the pill in his mouth and help him take a sip of water. Swallowing the pill, he drops back onto the mattress and looks up at you longingly. 
“Was worried…thought somethin’…couldn’t live without you….” His hand reaches out towards you as he traces the soft curve of your face. The feel of his rough calloused fingers on your skin sets your heart racing. 
“I’m ok. Ain’t nothing gonna happen to me. I learned from the best,” you say with a laugh as you nervously meet his gaze. 
“I’m gonna get us some food, I'll be right….” You start to say but he shakes his head. 
“No. Stay. Please.” His eyes are wide as he begs you to stay, shuffling around on the mattress as he tries to make room for you. 
“What are you doing, Joel?” You ask, raising your eyebrows in question. He pats the space beside him indicating that he wants you to lay with him. 
“What if I hurt you?” You ask as your eyes drift to his blood-stained shirt. “Won’t,” he breathes out as his eyes begin to droop closed. He’s still shivering slightly, and his skin still looks pale and clammy and you don’t have the heart to say no. 
With a reluctant sigh, you remove your jacket and slip in beside him, making sure you’re both covered by the blankets. His arm is wrapped around you as you rest your head on his chest and the soft beating rhythm of his heart lulls you to sleep.
***
“No….no please not her….can’t lose her….no, no…” Joel muttered in his sleep as his head tossed around, his grip on your waist tightening. 
He was having a nightmare. 
Sitting up a little, you gently place your hand on his cheek, your thumb rubbing soothing circles into the rough surface of his face. “Joel,” you whisper, trying to wake him without startling him. 
“Hey, Joel, it's ok. Wake up.” His eyes snap open and he panics until his gaze lands on you and his breathing slowly calms. 
You gaze down at him with a soft smile on your face as you continue to rub his cheek. “You were having a nightmare. Are you ok?”
His eyes take in the features of your face as the moonlight shines through the small window of the basement. “M’fine. Thought I - thought I lost you ....” He trails off as he slowly realises what he’s saying. 
His face has a little more colour to it and you swear you see the hint of a blush on his cheeks. 
“I’m here. I’m fine. It was just a bad dream, probably induced by the fever,” you giggle as you place the back of your hand on his forehead. “Seems to have broken, finally.”
“I know you heard what I said to Tommy.” He says matter of factly. “I know you think that I hate you….”
“It’s fine, Joel. You don’t have to explain anything. That’s just life. You like some people, you hate others. It is what it is.” His eyes furrow as he looks up at you, a confused look taking over the features of his face. 
“I don’t hate you. Never have. Don’t think I ever could. It's a bit hard to hate someone you’re in love with.” 
“What?!” You stutter nervously, your eyes blinking rapidly as you swallow the lump in your throat. 
“I love you darlin’. It’s the reason I didn’t want you to come on this run. I’m distracted when you’re out on patrol with me, I knew I’d be the same with this, it’s why I begged Tommy to reconsider letting you tag along. M’sorry if I ever made you feel like I hated you, 'cause I don't.”
You don’t know what to say. The words won’t form in your mind as you stare down at him in shock. He loves you. Your heart thrums loudly in your ears and you think for a moment that you’re gonna pass out. 
“You alright, darlin?” The sound of his Texan drawl, soft and low, breaks you from your trance. 
“Hmm? M’fine. I-I think I love you too.” His eyebrow quirks as a smile edges its way onto his face. “You think?” He teases. 
You nudge him in the chest, and he groans, holding his side and you panic you’ve hurt his stitches. “Oh my god! I’m so sorry Joel. I completely forgot,” you rush out, voice panicked as you lift his shirt to check. 
The sound of his laughter pulls your gaze up towards him. “Oh, for god's sake,” you huff as you turn and begin to push yourself off the mattress. His hand reaches out to grab your wrist, pulling you back into him. 
“M’sorry, darlin’. Couldn’t resist.” His hand slips up along your curves and settles on your face, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes flicker briefly to your lips, and you unconsciously lick along your bottom lip, pulling it between your teeth. 
“Will you two just kiss already? Jesus.” Ellie’s voice sounds from the top of the stairs. You both burst into laughter before he leans forward and captures your lips in a searing kiss.
His lips are a little rough, the feel of them against your own causing a shiver to work its way down your spine. He still tastes of whiskey he had earlier, and you want nothing more than push him down and fuck him into the mattress but you don’t. Instead, you pull away and rest your head against his, calming your racing heart. 
“We should get some rest,” you breathe raggedly as you blink down at him. 
Nodding his head, he kisses you softly once more before laying back on the mattress and pulling you with him, wrapping you up in his arms. “G’night, darlin’.” 
***
The gates open and Tommy comes rushing out with a worried expression on his face. “What the hell happened?” He asks, his gaze drifting from Joel to you as he waits for someone to tell him. 
“Long story,” Joel answers as he looks over at Ellie, a silent communication happening between them. Tommy huffs in frustration. “You’ve been gone for days. We thought - we thought you’d been killed or worse. Fuck!”
Joel slowly hops off the horse and makes his way towards his brother, clapping his hand on his back. “We’re alright, Tommy. Ain’t nothin’ to worry about. We’re just tired. Gonna need some more sleep and a decent meal.” 
Tommy nods his head, his eyes drifting to both you and Ellie. “Sure. How about you all head home and I’ll have Jason drop the food over.”
“That sounds amazin’ little brother. You’re just gonna have to have Jason drop Y/N’s food over to my place.”
Tommy's face freezes in shock before a sly smirk plays across his face. “Oh yeah. Somethin’ happen while you were out there?” He asks Joel, his voice almost a whisper so only he could hear. 
“Gentlemen never kiss and tell, Tommy. You should know that.” He smacks him on the back hard, winking at him before he turns and grabs his horse. Tommy knew something had happened from the slight blush on your cheeks. He’d get it out of Joel eventually. 
***
The room had been filled with silence as you all ate the dinner that Jason had brought over. The only sound to be heard was that of your forks and knives scraping off the plate. 
God, you hadn’t realised how hungry you were until the smell of the food hit your nose. The loud growl of your stomach made Joel smile as he finished setting the table. 
“Fuck that was good,” Ellie says as she sits back in the chair, hands resting on her now full stomach. 
“Manners,” Joel chastises as he pushes his plate away from him. 
“She’s not wrong though,” you say with a smile as you place your knife and fork on the plate and release a contented sigh. Joel hums in response as he lets his gaze wander over you both. 
He never thought he’d have this again. A normal life. A steady home. A family. Now that he does have it, he’s not too keen on letting it go. With the clearing of his throat, he throws Ellie a look, his eyes shifting towards the front door, and it only takes her a second to realise what he’s saying. 
“I’m gonna go meet up with Dina. Don’t wait up ya old fart.” She says with a laugh as she grabs her coat and slams the door behind her. 
“So…I guess I’ll help clear up and then I’ll let you get some rest.” You stand, the chair scraping across the floor as you grab your plate and make your way into the kitchen. 
You turn the tap on and begin to wash up when a set of arms wrap around you from behind. You startle. A soft gasp slips past your lips as Joel turns you slowly in his arms. 
You gulp nervously as you stare up at those golden-brown orbs. Your heart beats frantically at the feel of his touch. “Was thinkin’ maybe you could stay the night. I’ll make you pancakes and coffee in the morning.” 
His eyes are hopeful as he waits for you to say something. “Are you trying to seduce me, Miller?” You tease as your arms come to rest on his chest. Your fingers playing with the buttons on his shirt. 
“Is it workin’?” He says with a smile, his arms pulling you closer. 
“Maybe. Might need you to kiss me though, to make sure.” A smile plays across his face as he leans in and kisses you softly. You tease his bottom lip with your tongue, and he groans into your mouth, his fingers digging into your hips as he grinds into you. 
His cock hardens against you, and he groans when you run your hand down along his stomach and under the waistband of his jeans, cupping him with your hand.
“Fuck,” he breathes as he pulls away, forehead resting on yours. You run your fingers along the back of his neck and through his hair. “Need you,” you whisper into the shell of his ear, and he shivers. 
“Jesus, darlin’. You’re gonna be the death of me.” He grabs your hand from his trousers and leads you out of the kitchen and up the stairs towards his bedroom, where he kicks the door closed behind him as he walks you back towards his bed. 
He’s hungry for you. His eyes were blown wide with lust and you’re sure he’d have ravaged you by now if it weren’t for the fact that he’s healing. 
You pull him in for another kiss and let your hands glide over him as you begin to unbutton his shirt. Throwing it onto the floor before starting on his trousers. 
His rough calloused fingertips glide along your skin as he helps you remove your clothes, your breath hitching as they slip between your slick folds. 
You gasp. His mouth swallows the moan that follows as he kisses you softly. Pulling back his eyes trail over your naked form and when your gazes meet, you see nothing but adoration in those brown eyes you love so much. 
“How do you - how do you want to do this?” You ask as his hands grab onto the soft flesh of your ass. “Better take it slow for now. Don’t wanna burst a stitch,” he says with a smile in his voice. “Lay on your side, darlin’.” 
Doing as he says, you lay on your side, his warmth filling all your senses as he slips in behind you. You let out a breathy moan as his fingers delve into your heat once more, his hardened cock nestled snugly between your ass cheeks.  
“Oh fuck,” you whimper as he works his thick digits in and out of you, curling them ever so slightly as he hits that spot that sends you spiralling. 
Your skin is flushed. Sweat beads down along your breasts as he pinches your nipple between his forefinger and thumb. A shiver skitters down your spine as he whispers into the shell of your ear. 
“Ready for me darlin’?” 
You nod, “yeah- yes, fuck I’m ready please,” you whine as he runs the tip of his cock teasingly along your slick. “Joel…”
“Tell me what you want, baby.” 
“Need you inside - need you to fuck me, please.” With the head of his cock notched at your entrance he thrusts inside with a roll of his hips and you both let out a soft groan as he fills you. 
“Jesus, darlin’. So damn tight…fuckin’ squeezing the life outa me.” He takes a moment, closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath as he tries to control himself. His lips meet the skin of your neck as he peppers kisses along it, his hips moving slowly in tandem with his lips. 
It’s soft and slow. His hands glide over your skin, pinching and pulling as you moan softly into the room. Your body shudders as you come, your clit already sensitive from earlier. 
A soft cry slips past your lips as you reach behind to run your fingers into his hair. His hips stutter as he nears his release, the soft grunting in your ear becoming louder the closer he gets. 
“Ngh…fuck,” he groans as he quickly frees himself from your walls, spilling himself over the soft pillowy flesh of your ass. 
“Don’t move, darlin’.” He says as he slowly slips from the bed and grabs a piece of cloth to clean you with. He works it gently over your skin before throwing it into the basket at the end of his bed. 
The cool air makes you shiver involuntarily but Joel is quick to hop back into bed, slipping beneath the covers and pulling you close. 
 “I love you, darlin’,” he whispers into the crook of your neck and you can’t help the smile that works its way onto your face. 
“Hmm, I love you too.” He squeezes you gently before his breathing evens out and he falls asleep.  It’s safe to say that Joel Miller definitely doesn’t hate you. 
Everything: @maievdenoir @amneris21 @hnt-escape @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @jediknight122 @ayrusss @hayley-the-comet @sherala007 @alexxavicry @scorpio-marionette @donnaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @beskarprincessjenny @littlemisspascal @icanbeyourjedi @thatpinkshirt @maryfanson @sunnshineeexoxo @misspearly1 @misspearlssideblog @athalien @its--fandom--darling @sara-alonso @doommommy @browneyes-issac @trickstersp8 @nembees @kaitieskidmore1 @mswarriorbabe80 @allthe-ships @tintinn16 @hungrhay @rosie-posie08 @manuymesut @all-the-way-down-here @iccedays @tusk89 @graciexmarvel @pedrostories @musings-of-a-rose @untitledarea @your-voice-is-mellifluous @majestyjade @avengersfan25 @hummelmia @angstismydrug
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kaciidubs · 26 days ago
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Hands of Comfort
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✧ Summary: If there was one thing about Minghao, he knew exactly how to help you relax. ✧  ✧ Word Count: 584 ✧ Warnings: Fluff, implied smut, slice of life, comfort, open ended ✧  ✧ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ✧  ✧ Additional Tags: Inspired by my bestie @skz-elle, reader is referred to as flower, Minghao is referred to as Hao, a little something to help me get out of this writing rut ✧ Seventeen Masterlist ✧ General Masterlist
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The warmth of the bath seemed to penetrate through your skin and seep straight into your bones, relaxing your tense muscles while the soothing scent of honey and lavender filled your senses. With the dim glow of candles lining the edge of the tub and faint music floating through the air, this bath was one to do more than relieve your aches and pains.
“How are you feeling?”
You hummed softly, abandoning your aimless thoughts to bring your conscience back to reality – the presence of Minghao’s body behind yours only adding to the growing sense of comfort surrounding you.
“Amazing,” resting your head against his shoulder, you let your eyes flutter shut with a soft sigh, “thank you for this, Hao.”
His arms dipped underneath the water to wrap around your waist, allowing his hands to settle against your belly, “You don’t have to thank me for anything, unless you want me to start thanking you for simply existing?” Resting the side of his head against yours, the soft timbre in his voice sent your heart racing, “You deserve to be treated like this, and it’s been far too long since we’ve had time to relax together so why not enjoy it in the best way possible?”
Of course you were in no position to argue, and you were much less inclined to as the presence of his lips made their appearance known to your temple, followed by your cheek in a lingering, purposeful kiss – however, it wasn’t long until he went right back to his previous state, holding you within the fragrant waters of the tub.
The feeling of his chest rising and falling against your back prompted your subconscious to follow the motion; a deep inhale bringing with it the rich notes of herbal evergreen and sweet florals before slowly releasing it with a deep sigh. Eventually, each breath taken was rewarded with a feather-light kiss to your slightly damp skin; one pressed to the curve of your shoulder, then another beside that, then another at the junction of your neck, until his lips rested near your ear.
“Flower?” He murmured in a tone that sent goosebumps down your arms, though you were far from cold with the heat of the bath and the ever present warmth of his body behind your own. “I know this was meant to be… relaxing,” his hands trailed past the curve of your stomach and onto your thighs, fingertips tracing your skin like a painter’s brush to canvas, “but I think I have something to make this even more soothing, if you’d like.”
Perhaps it was the intimacy of it all – bathing by candlelight with the subtle sound of a piano dancing through the air – or maybe it was the shared breaths that created a private little bubble for you and you alone, but you found yourself nodding without restraint.
“Please.”
It was a simple plea, like the way his hands continued their journey upward, encouraging you to rest your legs over his own to spread just enough for his fingers to glide toward your pussy.
His touch was gentle as if you would dissolve like soap suds if he moved any faster, and the soft press of his index finger through your lower lips was as if he were caressing the petals of a flower.
“Tell me if it’s too much,” he whispered, lips grazing the shell of your ear while his finger teased your clit with a soft press, “or, if it’s not enough.”
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✧. ┊Tagged lovelies: @having-an-internal-crisis-rn, @midnightfrog625, @anyhow-everything, @bangchanbabygirlx, @sweetracha, @nightimescapes, @caitlyn98s, @ch4nn13luv, @ihrtlix, @jeonjungkookenthusiast1997, @maximumkillshot, @y-ur--i, @acker-night, @dreamescapeswriting, @specialstay, @s00buwu, @tinyelfperson, @jj-stay, @katsukis1wife, @inlovewithmusician, @keen-li, @armystay89, @main-character0, @vampcharxter, @ddyskz, @prettymiye0n, @bbgnyx, @bahng-chrizz, @milknhoneyracha, @hann1bee, @palindrome969, @newhope8, @kpopsstuffs, @starquokka, @wolfs-howling, @laylasbunbunny, @4-chan-inpadella, @butterflydemons, @kimahreummm, @ta3baee, @bethanysnow,  @skz-smut-reader
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galedekarios · 5 months ago
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also re: the last gale art i reblogged
when i have the spoons to do so, i'd also very much like to talk about gale and depression and him being high functioning. it's an extremely heavy topic, but i think it's one of those things - if not the thing - that resonated the most with me on a personal level while experiencing his story for the first time, and it still does now almost a year later.
his isolation, his deep loneliness, gale using his magic to create an escape for his mind when he felt there was none for his body and withdrawing from the circumstances surrounding him as much as he was still able to, while still feeling mystra's disappointment echoing through the weave the moment he tapped into it - which is something that we know from his origin playthrough hurts him more than anything else (in that case it's related to elminster, but i think we can draw the conclusion here as well).
gale's social circle slowly withering away, one by one, until it's not a circle anymore, but a pinhead. enough to only include tara now. and even with tara, we know he's expecting to become too much of a burden, too much of a hassle ("i feared she had abandoned me." he says in act 3, after his long time away). he's waiting for the other shoe to drop even with his own familiar. i'm sure he wished to have her by his side even when he rationally knew that she had to leave to find a cure - or to at least find means to stave off his condition. he fekt he couldn't burden the only immediate family he still has left: morena. afraid of shaming her, afraid of burdening her, afraid of putting her in danger.
despite all that, he manages to leave waterdeep, to seek a cure for himself, or at the least not present a danger to thousands of people around him, once he recognised he was no longer able to treat his condition.
and when we meet him there is almost no immediate trace of all that, he masks it with smiles and politeness and humour. he's friendly. affable. unflappable. he cooks, he fights, he reads, he's well kept, despite tara's nagging about eating regularly in gale's origin playthrough. you'd never know. you only get a sense of melancholy sometimes (his first camp scene, staring into the fire, unsure of what the tadpole means for him and, more importantly, the orb), when it's all too much and he hasn't calmed himself yet, hasn't quieted his mind fully ("i need to retrace my steps to a glade of calm and think").
what a difference a day makes.
(still, he's opening himself up a bit again, re-learning to live again, travelling with people he may have not met otherwise, some of whom have become his friends. it feels good to chat, it feels good to tell stories, to share knowledge and meals, and to not be alone.)
and even when it all comes crashing down around him in act 2, he receives mystra's orders with quiet acceptance and a smile. he thanks elminster. he's glad it was him. he deflects your concern and doesn't engage with the deeper meaning of what it means to do as he was asked. oh you know him, don't you. he's an optimist. it's all not so bad. at least his death will have meaning. at least he'll have forgiveness.
it's only much later that he lets himself acknowledge how scared truly is. terrified, he says. and even then, he marches on.
anyhow, excuse my disjointed rambling, i just have a lot of thoughts about it all.
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