#and you might say OH he probably doesnt really /know/ about the side effect but i raise you this

[popdrop]

I STILL CAN'T GET OVER HOW IN THE BEGINNING, CALE PUSHED EVERYONE AWAY. You may say it's because of how "dangerous" and "trouble packed" their journey will be in the story later on— BUT. I JUST CANT HELP BUT FEEL LIKE MAYBE , JUST MAYBE. He didn't want them to be affected by his "curse" (side effect of WS) whether he knew about it or not. Just consider the fact that he KNOWS what will happen to them and how they'll be fighting for a better world and it'd be MUCH better if he's not there. Just in case he worsens whatever will happen.

He's such an unreliable narrator <3 the Worst Kind Ever.

[foodtruckery]

I'm back again even though I just sent an ask I'm too eager to dump more idea on you lmfao

But its occured to me weve all been talking about stan going into heat but we havent really touched on the idea of ford going into a rut 👀 either it happens when he gets back out of the portal and it's some good hate fucking with his so angry and delirious that he cant tell if hes trying to bitch stan or just own him and then once hes got him knotted hes expecting that heat in his gut to fade but instead it's just burning hotter, his hips are twitching still and when stan squirms (just trying to adjust more than struggle because damn hes in his 60s and getting knotted on a basement floor is probably terrible for his back) ford cant help but clamp his teeth into stans throat, instinct telling him to keep stan pinned. His rut doesn't care that stan is an alpha (as far as he knows lol) and honestly ford himself barely cares at this point. Hes back in his home dimension. Hes back in his /home/ hes got stan under him as hes always wanted as he always should have had him because ford /deserves/ this. It's a sticky long mess with ford possessiveness really rearing its head through the rut

OR maybe the paranoia and the stress and the torture from bill all culminate into it because it's like bill is threatening his territory, and then stan shows up and the focus of most of his fantasies is there and /fighting him/ and he just loses it. Stan has to work him through it that first round because it's probably really fucking clear that ford is out of his mind in more ways than one. Hes so weak and exhausted and freaking the fuck out that stan just gets fed up and pins him down and rides a knot out of him (and then ofc bill would ruin things enough that stan has to scramble to get ford in his lucid moments to help explain how to keep bill out of his head and keep them both safe) stan would have SO much on his plate in that time though hed absolutely compartmentalize. Not even allow himself to really focus that hes actually fucking his brother right now (and then hopes that ford was just a little too out of it during the rut to remember that stan was just a liiiittle bit too wet for it to have just been lube)

OR if we want to go even FURTHER back (I'm holding onto your arm and dragging you along we ain't got time to dawdle in this ask I guess) maybe ford uses his rut as his excuse to get close to stan as teenagers. Playing up how uncomfortable it is and pressing up against stan. He doesnt have the guts to ask to fuck him but stan isnt pushing him away so hell take what he can get. Crawling down into stans bed, pretending he just wants to be close to him, claiming his smell helps (which I'm sure it does but maybe a little more than ford is admitting to either of them) then scootching closer and closer until hes pressed up against stan a slow grind turning into desperate dry humping in their bunk bed and telling stan how good he feels how much he needs this you're so good to me Stanley you're so /soft/

(And ofc stan is just doing this because fords in distress right now. Ford needs this. That's all. Him popping a boner is just a natural side effect and he is NOT analyzing this any further)

-🐶

breaking my answering order because you got me fucked up with this one, 🐶, omfg. this is incomplete and might never actually be cleaned up and completed but oh well!

“Jesus, are you gonna calm down or what?” Stan pants, acutely aware of the strain across his shoulders and thighs and the ache in his knees.

Pinned to the ground underneath him, Ford growls wordlessly and tries to twist a wrist free. Well, that answers that question. 

Stan huffs in annoyance and shoves Ford’s wrists along the ground to a spot above his head, hopefully to reduce any leverage he might have. He has questions and a lot of them, but they’re apparently going to have to wait until Ford is capable of using his words again.

“You know, Sixer,” he says, aiming for conversational but coming out a little too winded for that. It’s fine, Ford isn’t gonna be able to tell. “If this weren’t so damn annoying, it might be funny. Y’know, you of all people basically speechless.”

Ford snarls and bucks his hips, and Stan hisses out a curse. 

“I’m workin’ on it, all right?!” he snaps, grinding back down in retaliation, though it only makes Ford rumble under him again. 

“I swear to god, Stanford, this better not be what you asked me to come up here for,” he gripes, squeezing his hands around Ford’s wrists as he works his hips in small, tight circles, trying to relax enough for the next step. It fucking reeks of alpha pheromones in here, and courtesy of his latest drug cocktail, that just has him even more on edge. Probably for the best that one of them is keeping their head on right now.

Ford jerks his hips again, demanding, and Stan grits his teeth when they almost get his stupid fucking knot in him that time. They might be done with this part already if he’d had a chance to loosen up first, or if he could reach down and help himself out. But no!

Shit had gone from weird to weirder from the second he showed up on Ford’s doorstep. Something was clearly going on, and something was clearly wrong, but he’d barely gotten Ford to put the honest-to-god crossbow down before his brother had started spiraling in an equally aggressive but notably different direction. 

He’s trying not to think too much about it, but Stan doesn’t actually know what he’s gonna do if Ford doesn’t settle down a little once they’re locked in together.

“You know, this would be a hell of a lot easier if you would just let me—nngh!” Stan chokes and curls over Ford when a particularly sharp snap of his hips finally gets his knot inside. “F-Fucking ow.”

When Ford doesn’t immediately growl at him, Stan forces himself to sit up a little again, wincing as he settles more fully onto Ford’s scrawny ass hips. The bite of Ford’s zipper against his ass isn’t great, and the fact that he’s got one pant leg still caught around his own shoe from how fast he’d had to shuck them off is also less than comfortable, but heyyy. They did it. 

“Now are you gonna calm the fuck down for a minute?” he says, watching Ford’s expression slowly soften into bleary confusion. 

“…S-Stanley…?” he croaks, and Stan can’t help but wince. He doesn’t even have any water nearby for him. 

“Yeah, that’s me.”

Ford glances around at the mess their tussling has made of his living room (is this a living room?) before looking back at Stan. And Stan sees the moment Ford gets up to speed. More panic, like from the porch, seeps into his expression as he realizes exactly what position they’re in.

“Wh-What happened? What did he— what did he do?!”

“Whoa, hey! Shh, Ford, it’s okay,” Stan insists, leaning down to clumsily press his forehead against Ford’s, bearing more of his weight down to keep him still. “You’re okay. You, uh, went into rut when I got here and…look, you were freaking out, and I was just trying to help. But you’re all right.”

Ford makes a whining noise that sounds horribly out of place given the situation. It’s too high, too shrill, to be coming from an alpha in rut, and it twinges at something in Stan that makes the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. 

“Y-You can’t be here, Stanley,” Ford says, insistent and frantic, and squirming underneath him until Stan’s breath hitches.

“Stop! Stop moving around like that,” he snaps, his own cock twitching as he presses this thighs harder on either side of Ford’s hips to try and hold him in place. “I can’t go anywhere, Poindexter. Not for like twenty more minutes or some shit. And then you’re gonna go out of your fucking head again.”

The look Ford gives him as that sinks in is so horrified that Stan suddenly feels sick. How badly had he fucked up here? He thought— 

Well when they were younger, before he left, and Ford would crawl into his bunk and pant for some kind of help against his shoulder and grind against his hip in the dark, and he’d assumed that was still— shit. 

Shit.

He’d just been trying to help. 

“I…Stanford, f-fuck, I’m sorry,” he stammers, leaning back and letting go of Ford’s wrists. A cold feeling settles into his gut and churns there when Ford doesn’t immediately move his hands. “I— Maybe we can time it good, and I can get some distance before you go under again? Once it goes down, I mean. I—“

A hand touches his cheek and startles Stan out of his babbling. Ford’s flushed expression has drawn down into something grim and determined. And it’s obviously taking an effort but his voice is mostly steady when he speaks up again.

“Stanley. It isn’t safe for you here. You have to leave as soon as you can. Do you understand me?”

“…No,” Stan says bluntly, frowning. “The fuck are you talking about? Because of— because of this?” he asks waving between them.

He’s even more confused when Ford shakes his head. 

“No! Well. Partially, but not—“ Ford growls, low and angry and Stan can fucking feel it where they’re still tied together. “I’m not going to have time to explain it, Stanley. I shouldn’t have asked you to come. You have to leave. Immediately.”

“…Are you fucking kidding me?” Stan demands, swatting the hand off his face and leaning back as far as he’s able when Ford sits up, biting his tongue hard enough to draw blood to keep from gasping at the way it grinds Ford’s knot inside of him. 

For his part, Ford looks dizzy when he sits up, and Stan thinks he might fall back over, but he manages to keep himself upright.

“Stanley—“

“Are you seriously so freaked out about this that you’re sayin you shouldn’t have reached out in the first place?!”

Ford’s nostrils flare, and despite the heavy bags under his eyes, his pupils are dilating again, his scent spiking with renewed aggression. God dammit, they can’t afford for him to get worked up again this fast, especially not when Stan’s lost his leverage.

“No!” Ford barks, sweat beading at his temples and eyes flicking down between them. “But it isn’t safe here, and I can’t keep him from hurting you like this!”

“Him? Ford, who the fuck are you talking about?” Stan asks, grabbing him by the wrist when a hand starts reaching blindly for his thigh. “Is somebody else in your creepy house?!”

Ford’s eyes are going a little hazy again, and the suggestion of “someone else” being nearby makes him growl menacingly, which isn’t helpful in the slightest. 

Stan grabs him by the other wrist before he thinks to use it and pushes Ford down onto his back again. He goes easily, thank god. “You gotta give me something to work with here, Ford!”

“Bill,” Ford snarls, and Stan looks over his shoulder like he expects to see someone has walked in on them. Who the fuck is Bill?

“Something helpful, dammit,” he says, breath stuttering when Ford rolls his hips like he can’t help himself. He probably can’t. 

“M-My pupils,” Ford manages to get out, his voice gone gravel and unsteady in his throat, like it’s hard to make the shape of words. “They’ll change. Th-That’s Bill.”

Stan honestly has no idea what the fuck that’s supposed to mean. 

But a moment later Ford tries to roll them, and he has to turn his focus to bracing himself and keeping him down. Whatever the fuck is going on, he was right to not let himself get trapped under a rutting alpha. Especially not with Ford dealing with…whatever the fuck this is in the moments that are supposed to be lucid.

When Ford strains to try snapping at his arm or shoulder, Stan presses down and circles his hips again to grind more pointedly against Ford’s knot. The friction and the spike of Stan’s own arousal are enough to at least distract him for the moment, so Stan focuses on that as best he can while keeping an ear out for whoever this Bill character is.

[the-s1lly-corner]

TADC cast x fairy!reader

Hey anon I totally didnt accidentally post your ask before it was done being written and deleted it in a panic I promise that did not happen, if you happen to see this

Anyways

Uhuh

I never actually watched peter pan or any of the tinkerbell films(?????) So uh uh uh!!! I am yappin about stuff I'm not qualified for!!

CAINE:

OOOOOH!! He thinks you look so so cute and pretty! You guys fly together and talk, I think that's nice! Absolutely does call you tinkerbell

Probably adds a quiet and sped up "trademark" when he calls you that

Is tinkerbell trademarked? I... actually dont know how trademarking works... I know how copyright works but uhuh

He makes you a garden in the digital world, makes it huge with the most exotic plants he can think of! ...some probably dont actually exist in the real world

POMNI:

Depending on if you're normal sized or on the shorter side, I think she would find comfort in knowing that theres another short person around... does not enjoy the dust you leave behind when you start flying, though, it feels like glitter... feels very

Gritty...

RAGATHA:

Honestly I love the idea that ragatha grew up on fairly tales

Princesses, monsters, snot course, fairies! So I think even if she doesnt remember her life in the real world, she finds a comfort in being around you!

Oh she thinks you're so so pretty... I think she would keep some of your dust and out it in some jewelry. Like a locket,.. I think thatd be cute esp if you two are together

She doesnt even wanna use it for anything, assuming the dust has actual properties that effect stuff.. she just thinks its pretty

JAX:

I hope you guys all know that when he calls you tinkerbell he doesnt mean it as a cute endearing lovey dovey couple name. At least not fully. Nah at least some of it is him messing with you

I think he harvests your dust and throws it at people

Pocket sand!/ref

Definitely makes fun of your height if you're short. You dont even have to be the shortest. In fact I think he might even exaggerate how short you are. Might even say you're shrinking

All in good fun, of course

KINGER:

Ah... a ruler and a "magical" creature... just like in the story books!

Probably treats you as if you were a real fairy, even though he likely knows you're not..

"My radiance," became you shimmer and glow thanks to your dust and "magic"

You know how some people write people absolutely fawning over beautiful mythical creatures that theyve just discovered?

That's kinger with you

GANGLE:

ZOOBLE:

Oncr again I am presenting the hc that zooble was into supernatural and mythological stuff before they got stuck in the digital circus, so they would definitely hold at least a little interest in your digital body... though I dont think they would like your dust, either, since it can get stuck in between their limbs and joints and crevices and

Ieufjgkgmgmv

You know?

Probably hits you with those lil handheld vacuum cleaners before you even enter their room

Nope, no dust today!

Its nothing against you personally, it's just so uncomfortable for them..!

Also thinks you're really pretty! Makes art for you and probably incioperates your dust into the art!

I think I mentioned this idea in... I dont remember if it was a winged reader or a bird reader or both.. but I said she incooperates the readers loose/fallen feathers into art gifts, like how people used to put the hair of their deceased loved ones in jewelry

Same thing here but of course you're not deceased!

[rivalkieran]

domestic life 1, 9, 12

pre-relationship 5

love 7, 9, 12, 13, 15

this is. a lot so Im putting it under a cut :P

domestic life:

When they move in together, who gets the most say in decorations? What do they each have to have in the house? I think theyd have like an equal say in the decorations. they dont really coordinate themes or color schemes for the rooms or anything like that I think they just get whatever they like which results in their apartment looking like an absolute mildly overstimulating patchwork mess. and they like it that way :) barring the obvious Battle Stuff both of them would like posters kieran maybe a little moreso (they diverge in like. the specific interests those posters reflect? florian has alot of game merch and kieran has band merch) and also I think florian would like collecting figurines and plushies and stuff. oh also I think kierans various masks he carves would be used as decor around the whole place :3

How do they celebrate holidays? dependssss on the holiday I think. for most holidays (a la xmas halloween new years) its probably more like a big friendgroup hangout session. I dont think either of them would really give a shit about valentines day. HOWEVER they would absolutely go all out for the festival of masks every year. they fly out to kitakami, kieran makes custom masks for them every year, they have a little picnic date night on oni mountain etc etc. yes both of them make jokes about that field trip. mostly kieran though LOL

Who likes to dance with, or sing for, the other? honestly I dont think either of them are very inclined to sing for eachother I dont see that happening. at most I think florian would threaten to burst out into song and kieran would go "dont do that." and thats the end of that bit. DANCING THOUGH... I can see that happening during the more mellow hours (blacklight has those? surprising I know) and it would be initiated by mostly florian aswell. overall shes probably the one that specifically references the swordfight more between the two of them. except it would be actual dancing for all of maybe 5 minutes if theyre being generous before it inevitably devolves into an elaborate game of tag

pre-relationship:

What would their lives be like if they had never met? alot worse! neither of them would get that push from eachother to break out of their shells and both of them would slowly rot inside of those shells having never gotten the chance to bloom into their own person leaving both of them as hollow husks of themselves :D also this would butterfly effect into the continuation of the protag/rival feedback loop so Everyone would be worse! fun!

love:

Who is better at comforting the other? How do they usually comfort each other? kieflos communication style is veryyyy. telepathy image. so I dont think their type of comfort would be like verbal atleast not in the traditionally 'comforting' way? kieran especially would Not like the traditional verbal comfort LOL. their brand of comfort is probably just providing a distraction of some kind or like just Being Around. no need for words. I wouldnt describe either of them as being 'better' at the comforting thing either... idk its hard to judge since theyre so Weird about it

What reminds them of each other? honestly it might be an easier question to ask what DOESNT remind them of eachother. like if theyre not in eachothers direct presence theyre probably still on eachothers minds to some degree so basically anything is fair game here. if I had to point out something specific though I think theyd go "oh theyd like this" alot at stuff that pertains to the others interests. like. kieran picks up a plushie from the arcade when he passes by bc florian likes them. florian picks up a cd of that new album from that band kierans been enjoying lately. etc. you get the idea

Who remembers the little things? both of them! its thematically important to both sides that they get to see Everything from eachother so both of them would hang on to every little detail about eachother <3 theyre so disgusting can we put them down please

How do they make up after an argument? Who is the first one to apologize? They Don't! kieflo toxic-to-everyone-except-themselves moments. they have a lot of arguments yes but its nearly almost always stupid shit that theyre arguing about for the thrill of the debate itself. theyll get passionate about anything if theyre pit against eachother. so like. no need for apologies. if the argument actually WAS something substantial, then... well for one theyre both too stubborn to apologize and also tbh I dont think either of them would Want to be apologized to? verbally atleast. ...ok well florian would enjoy getting apologized to but then she'd feel grosser about That than the actual argument but kieran would rather die. they work on like a karma system I feel like. instead of saying sorry they just have to repay the other through like a pokemon battle or something

What gifts do they typically give each other? actually I kinda already half answered this in the what reminds them of eachother question. their gifts to eachother are just stuff they know the other likes. its a very casual arrangement like 'oh they mentioned they wanted that' go in and buy it no biggie

[sumbreon]

more book thoughts

the shops back up you can now buy these books

ive not read anymore yet, using it to bribe myself into doing laundry but ive been stewing on things. this will be even less coherent cause im just gonna throw my thoughts out here as they come to me unlike before where we had a mild focus

what is machas plan here? turning up as félix to fuck with islin about cypress like what was the intent there because i doubt it had the intended effect with islin going 'it should be me courting you félix!' which also islin my man... ya coulda!!! oh no i just remembered hesper signed the fuckin courting card or whatever with a little paw print really good! the whole thing with cypress is really good too honestly. the pacing for after félix gives bowman (françois) the ultimatum was so good it felt like so long not being in félixs pov and seeing it from bowmans i was absolutely losing it like let me into that little bastards head again what the fuck is going on??? to then finally get his pov again and just... i dont think that could have been done any better it fuckin killed me. anyway macha clearly still wanting to fuck with félixs boys but tamer than in the first book but what for? im also both dreading and looking forward to whenever they and félix meet like its your bosses new little guy vs its the fucker who tried to kill your friends (maybe? dont know for sure that macha intended for anyone to die but they definitely could have/almost did!) so fucking with islin by being félix and fucking with bowman by attacking rangers as a viper tbh even less clear on how that ones meant to a work out whats gained from turning the rangers against the viper? whats esks relationship with the rangers? cain made a comment to bowman after the whole graveyard incident and what did you mean by that man? whats your damn deal macha?

also every bowman chapter is accompanied by the mild apprehension of 'there was a warning for intentional misgendering its probably gonna be against bowman' who the fucks gonna do that to my boy? and i love that esks general response to bowman having to avoid saying hes the supposedly dead mercier girl is why is this even an issue. esk continues to not be helpful! but i am delighted by bowman and esk throughout this book so far me everytime its bowman time:

to be clear im having a good time, bowman less so. still makes me laugh that esk referred to félix as 'the pony'. and i loved that little scene on the train with félix and esk about félixs body and i think esk was maybe already aware? when the supposed viper attacked the rangers esk says a powerful black horse could maybe do that and says félix couldnt do that being so young a black horse? wonder just how much of esk not being helpful is being a bit of an ass and if any of its lingering effects from being stuck in that trophy room? god that was a horrifying scene and from what we see of tua it affected the weapons badly, esk wasnt there as long but it was still there

senca... girl whats your angle here? what sort of game is this to you? what are you getting out of it? i believe her when she tells esk that shes on the boys's side but im still not 100% trusting her

just how many times has léa threatened to cut bowmans dick off? enough that félix didnt let her finish the suggestion. and i keep thinking about léa telling félix about bowman not counting it as cheating with félix specifically like could you boys make this any more complicated? how the hell is félix meant to deal with that info? also made me think of that post where a girl had been having gay sex with her friend for like a decade and was like sex with her doesnt count and it ended with her saying to her boyfriend if it was cheating shes cheating on her friend with him then and not the other way around (i might try and find that post again. ill probably fail)

okay laundry done i might come back and add more or i might not

[i-sveikata]

as i’m so glad to find your tumblr 😭 i’ll bother you a bit haha 🤣

the whole chapter vegas was so protective!! i love it so much 😭 the way he even positioned himself in front of pete so that he wouldn’t be targeted by the person who killed porsche’s uncle 🥹 i screamed. i like how he prioritise pete 🥹 i bet no one ever did this for pete before

but i wonder if it’s against his father what is he gonna do? he never had power against him 🤨 he went against him a few times for pete i feel like he could do that again 😍

they talked about love before, how vegas could love him if pete just gave in. pete kind of gave in? 😂 could we assume that vegas is in love with pete now?

i wonder when they will actually fuck like you know really fucking 🥹 i am sorry i’m not a horny person i swear but it was nice reading pete’s turmoil when he was getting fucked it was intense 😳😳😳😳 also vegas said something about that too? how he wants to fuck him again how he want pete to beg him? oh what if it’s vegas who begs 🤤

you’re genuinely nice person i can’t believe i didn’t figure out your tumblr 😭😭 thank you for writing this amazing fic i hope there will be lots of chapters 😭 (and yeah please let’s kill kinn or let him suffer in the mercy of pete’s hands)

hello hello!!! oh hahaha no not at all a bother i wouldnt have shared my tumblr if i didnt want people to come and talk to me!

omg honestly so true like the danger and his injuries had him literally operating on like basic instinct default mode: stay alive, keep pete alive and safe, trust no one. like bro legit did not have the room for anything more complicated than that right then which i mean fair he was not doing so crash hot when he came barging into pete's room. oh definitely pete has never experienced this before (like obvs his grandma has done it to some degree but probably not to the same kind of level in his adult years when he was no longer at home) and he may be in the protection of the main family by working for them (however little protection that might be with recent events) but that came at the cost of being a priority himself, by sacrificing that mentality of always putting the family first like the other bodyguards. pete has definitely forgotten what it feels like to be on the receiving end of that which was why he wasn't even really expecting anything when he called vegas' name. and why he was even more shocked when vegas dropped everything and answered the call like there was no other outcome in his mind.

oooooh very good question which i wont really spoil if i can but the way i interpret it is vegas never really had much of a reason to go against him like that before. to some extent he believes the shitty things that his father has always said about him and if he was ever going to fight back or run away it would be on someone else's behalf not his own. because he's grown so use to disassociating from his own body and pain. but since he's shielded macau as effectively as he can already and he doesnt face the same kind of scrutiny as a second son, vegas doesnt have a drive yet strong enough to overcome his loyalty to the minor family. So whilst he does recognise he doesn't have much power against his father he's never really felt justified in completely defying him like that, because to some extent (in his mind) what his father says is true.

basically the idea of vegas going up against his father is less about the thought that he'd do it because he knows pete wants to stop him and that he has to pick a side- and its more about how vegas has found something for himself that has the potential to be good, and he's willing to fight for it.

they have very sparingly discussed love- glossed over it more like- and yeah vegas is very trying to show his feelings through action. i take him as an acts of service/physical touch kind of love language person which was why it was so important that vegas went to pete when he was weak and helpless. like that was an act of trust that he rarely gives out to anyone.

omg lol personally i wouldnt say that pete has truly given in at all, he's simply recognised they have a mutual interest (seeking their pleasure in one another) and hes weighed the option of continually fighting his urges and making himself more miserable against following his desire to have the cake and eat it too. but as soon as that mutual interest starts to diverge in any way you can rest assured pete will not just be following along willingly. and when their unspoken agreement no longer suits him he definitely wont be playing nice just because vegas still wants to win him. i think we are definitely pretty close into the vegas' deepening affection for pete stage definitely like we are already seeing little choices here and there that are starting to set him apart from his father in more significant ways and from his supposed goal of overthrowing the main family.

they definitely will be!! unfortunately for them its now too deeply rooted in their ongoing dynamics and power struggle for pete to just jump into bed with him and go all the way without another thought. even if vegas desperately wants that and there are parts of pete that are steadily warming to the idea. theres still going to be lots of starts and stops before they figure out the boundaries (and of course some super unhinged behaviour from the both of them first which, like, naturally) but i do promise you they will get there!! their horniness can overpower anything lol. but i will say no more for the time being ;)

oh my god thank you honestly you are so sweet!! youre so welcome this has been a blast to write and such a fun and interesting challenge! omg the kill kinn vibe continues lol not sure ill go that far but a little suffering never hurt lol

[goldensunset]

SUNSET I JUST LEARNED THE WORD STRELITZIA USES FOR “AFTERWORLD” IN THE JAPANESE IS CLOSER TO “LAND OF THE DEAD” AND IM NOT TAKING IT WELL

WE WERE RIGHT AFTER 3 SORA ACTUALLY DIED

IM ALSO GETTING A BAD FEELING SORA DOESNT REMEMBER KAIRI OR ANY OF HIS FRIENDS SHES GOING TO HE HEARTBROKEN WHEN SHE FINDS HIMMMMM

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO JUST LIVE A NORMAL LIFE UNTIL KH4 RELEASES SEND HELP

i can’t even say i’m surprised; ‘afterworld’ is in itself a weird way of saying a world of the afterlife. they most definitely died. but as strelitzia also said, this is a world full of life. so they still exist. there are many ways to ‘die’ in this series but it’s pretty hard to actually stay dead. as far as we know, true death is when your heart returns to kingdom hearts, but then even then it seems you’ll be reborn.

this is all to say that it is hard, maybe even impossible, to ever truly stop existing in this universe. which is fun. in fact i’d say the closest thing we’ve gotten is in fact this nonsense with quadratum. like they really are Pretty Far Gone in a new type of way if they don’t even exist within our own reality anymore. but even then even if you’re no longer ‘real’ you still exist…within ‘unreality’…? that’s wildly meta. this series is bonkers. it’s such an amazingly cool and creative idea i’m jealous i didn’t come up with it.

so like. i WOULD say oh it’s not a big deal it’s just another place for him to be brought back from. but then apparently it’s hard to go back to where you came from. which is,,,very very concerning,,, it seems like getting there isn’t as hard as we’ve thought (riku can you really just open a portal?? as long as you have the nameless star’s help bc she’s from that reality??? i call hacks). but then leaving is. well we know nameless star came from there into our world somehow. it’s unclear if MoM went there and back and then there again or not. but i get the feeling you probably need some kind of great power to traverse the two sides of reality at will.

(we know MoM talks to young xehanort in our world at some point so he must’ve either time traveled first into the future then went to quadratum? or he went there, came back to talk to yx or whatever, then went back again. either way some time shenanigans have happened here bc he’s still alive and strelitzia is still alive and hasn’t aged. anyway blah blah blah i need to stop derailing my own posts-)

but yeah i am Worried for our boy. and i really hope they don’t downplay how bad this situation is. or how significant it is that he’s on the other side of reality. in absolutely no circumstances do i just want this to be a simple rescue mission for riku or even someone else like kairi that eventually decides to come join him. they gotta make this difficult and be creative with it. like sora might actually be screwed.

i mean i believe there’s always a way to fix things eventually but i can’t help but wonder if being there will have some significant effect on him. like what if he adjusts too well and doesn’t want to come back? he’s convinced he’s a part of this fictional realm now, maybe that he always was a part of it? or…what if…

what if he doesn’t forget his friends per se but starts to forget they’re real? like he can’t remember ever having actually met them and starts to think of them as OCs that he daydreamed up? or if kingdom hearts is an actual video game in this reality then like they become blorbo from his games instead of his real friends? so if and when he meets them again he knows who they are but either doesn’t believe his eyes or just doesn’t love them the same anymore???

imagine your friend dies and your memories of them start to slip away but then a video game with a character just like them comes out and you start to get really attached to them for some reason but you don’t know why cuz it’s just a silly game right? you’re obviously not taking it THAT seriously haha right?. do you ever think about stuff like that. what if this fictional character used to exist in our universe but we don’t remember. what if sora was our bestie from a time we can’t remember. that would be so meta i would lose my head screaming. sorry for the existential crisis

[reynie-muldoons]

"Blank Expression" liveblog!

This episode title scares the shit out of me. Let's crack in.

0:17 so Dr. Garrison is in the recap 👀 methinks she will be in the episode

0:57 they got *off*??? WHY WOULD THEY GOT OFF WITHOUT HER

1:19 angy Kate is angy

2:29 "actually.. there might be someone" I know they cut to tetherball so its 100% Martina but my heart was asking for Moocho 😂 it's so cool they're bringing her back, she deserves it

2:37 THERE'S OUR GIRL!!!! She looks so fucking good!!

2:52 oh my gosh the tearaway pants hahaha

2:58 i had a thought that I will not elaborate on- she's the athletic version of Dipper Pines

3:15 AWWW THAT FAAAACE

3:19 okay the music was creepy but Constance still looks cute as a button in that coat

3:31 daaaayum! There she is!!!

4:27 I'll never skip this intro. Never

4:52 I love that the bucket is their identifier

5:24 "I dont think Curtain is the only armchair neuroscientist in the game" something about that sentence scratches the back of my brain 😂

5:33 Milligan's chemist background is peaking through

5:54 I would say that I would kill for her, but Rhonda can handle her damn self. You go bbg

6:28 ooooh is it time for vigilante Garrison??

6:32 "I invented it." there it is 🙃

6:44 alright, a little more respect for her here. She wasnt willing to test this shit on people without further testing, knowing there could be some crazy side effects

7:01 shit, did she rebuild the whisperer?

7:03 shit she did rebuild the whisperer

7:17 I cant tell if Garrison is about to try to make Constance a lab rat, try to team up, or try to make her disappear

7:47 okay so like a mixture of lab rat and team-up, got it

7:54 "I'm not your dancing bear. I eat bears." What does that mean 😂😂

8:00 shit. fuck. Okay, so it's a combination of lab rat, team-up, and making her disappear. Shit.

8:27 I dont like this. I really dont like this.

8:37 two things:

1. What the fuck is that weird-ass jumper suit outfit 🥴 get a sense of style

2. What is it with this guy and tableside meal preparation

9:03 "the constant grip of existential angst" that describes my day to day LOL

9:16 "you are going to completely reverse whatever it is you did to him" that's the thing, I dont think Curtain even can. He didnt let Garrison run the necessary testing

9:37 he's eating a crepe at her 🥴

9:54 "I'm not hungry" I'm bitter they left that part of her book characterization out of the show, it would have been so easy to adatlpte

10:04 "I'm not falling for it" okay but what if it's not something you fall for, it kind of seems like something that can happen passively if you're focused on him enough

10:37 she fucking chose that name, fuck off and stop trying to recruit her as your new Dr. Garrison

11:02 "you know how I know? Pure joy triggers his narcolepsy." Oooooh. Mic drop.

11:34 as she should. Eat your fucking crepe babe

11:46 awwwwww

11:56 PIE TRUCK. THEYRE SO CLOSE

12:00 MARTINA IN A PIE TRUCK!!!!!

12:04 oh wait wait that's not a pie truck that's their team's truck 😂😂😂

12:18 "how hell-bent on vengeance do you have to be to go after a tiny child?" I love that Martina is the voice of reason. Scratch that, I just love Martina

12:37 "I bought in, I excelled, and no on cares." Spoken like a true ex-cult member

13:09 I don't know about a leader

13:16 "doesnt your team need this gear?" "Yeahh, probably" dude 😂😂😂

13:34 "maybe if they dont appreciate what I bring... maybe they dont get a van." Impeccable logic!

13:46 what the fuck is happening

14:02 this poor child wtf

14:43 "no one will be left out of our loving, loving family." See, this is why the whole fake happiness thing is fucked up. Curtain's like yeah hey come love in our compound, it's really nice :) but you cant leave. You'll be really fucking happy! But literally nothing else, only happy. There are no strings attached! Except everyone owes me for making them not be miserable anymore. It's similar to the Institute, where they stated there were no rules but there absolutely were. That's not to mention the mental unhealthiness and unsustainability of it all, and the manipulation that comes with this.

14:53 another one 🙃

15:29 "you are sanguine." "I am undercover!" Their dynamic right now reminds me of a drunk person trying to convince a sober person they're not drunk

15:39 this is real weird

15:49 oh lord now mr b has to play both sides

15:58 fucking christ

16:16 aoon enough the storeroom wont be big enough to hold them

16:21 Roll credits!

16:32 allergic reactions dont do that bud

16:38 alright, stiff necks. Noted. Can't wait to see mr b rubbing his neck like sebastian was in like 2 episodes

16:57 gotta love medical malpractice

17:10 so the polo team's with Garrison. I didnt put that together earlier lolol

17:38 I bet she doesnt give dental

17:48 "any financial stress-of which there is none-is worth the freedom I have now" methinks the lady doth protest too much

17:51 "being out from under that man's oppressive thumb is priceless" HA that's one sure thing she's being truthful about

18:23 awwwww. Reynie was about to take the blame, but Sticky made it clear they all agreed and went out together :')

18:55 yeah no I dont like that she called Constance an asset either, but now's not the time

19:13 them 30 seconds ago: "we havent covered the whole area" them, walking 2 feet across the tracks: "OH LOOK PRINTS"

19:37 I find it funny that they put a translation of the train sign in that 1 second between dialogue

20:09 RHONDA SLAY

20:39 a chemist who just had a baby, its Milligan all over again 🥺 Rhonda will defend the chemist, surely

20:52 smart move

21:52 you cant just tell someone to get that angry on command 🥴

22:05 well, she did break it

24:05 "I see a broken person who's angry." therapist!Constance is not wrong

24:33 she sounds like how Curtain did in the season 1 finale right before he had an narcoleptic episode- in denial

25:55 I love how Kate doesn't use bobbie pins in her hair but she sure does have them in the bucket

26:12 they made it burggrub, but the kids got off the train before it could ever stop there. Fun little game of tag that the adults are marvelously failing at

26:17 I know I've said this every single episode but I love Milligan and Miss Perumal's dynamic SO MUCH

26:20 DIPIKA????? The show strikes again with coming up with first names names for characters that we were never canonically told

26:24 ohhhh no no no no

26:24 alternatively, does this mean the two of them will be taken to the compund? With Mr B and Number Two?

26:44 noooo not the hippie clothes

27:16 I dont know how much this faux happiness thing is messing with his thought patterns. Like is he actually trying to use his position as leverage, or is he just saying that to try and stay longer?

27:25 there's a plan hatching and I'm worried about it lol, she's been murderous all season

27:33 "we're gonna kidnap him." "What?" LMAO SHE'S SO FRANK ABOUT IT

27:49 *graphically describing the death of a proverbial animal* remember how I said she's been murderous all season? Yeah 😂

28:05 llama!

28:14 shit. I didnt think he had been a recipient of the technique thing?? But apparently so

28:27 oh my gosh the sobbing in the distance. What did therapist!Constance do to this poor woman

28:39 this is about what I expected HAHA

28:55 "did she hurt you?" "She's the one who's hurting." Therapist!Constance strikes again

29:12 man, I thought we were getting somewhere with her 🥴

I'm excited to see where this goes! The kids have had a startling reunion, and the adults are about to have one themselves.

29:18 man. They just had to end it there. This season's had some great cliffhangers

Bingo for the next episode is coming tonight :)) what did you guys think?

[tigerdrop]

in lieu of doing more strenuous hand-based activities heres the Dogboy Gordon In Heat Megamix ive been talking about. i wrote this over the course of a couple months in an effort to feel okay about writing horny shit again and i only just realized there are nearly 6 thousand words here. and they only really fuck for like 10% of that

ta-dah

ive thought a lot about gordon being stuck back at gordonhouse after getting kicked out of barneyhouse. i think its ripe for a lot of pining. (and yes, he is pining over the guy hes actively banging. hes being a big mopey idiot over the fact that he doesnt get to have his fuckbuddy around 24/7.) absence makes the heart grow fonder or whatever and gordons already at a baseline of "wheres benrey. wheres benrey"......and now i am about to turn it up to 11

so lets say......gordons starting to feel weirdly under the weather. sweaty and irritable and tired. hes holing himself up in his room a lot, wrapping himself up in blankets to fight off a chill and a sniffliness that wont go away. and hes gettin awfully moody, too. real fuckin testy. starting shit with freemind for no reason and snapping at og gordon like hes a teenager. and......hes nesting, almost, or at least, gathering up a whole bunch of blankets and pillows and anything that smells vaguely like benrey. (hes not really aware hes doing this last thing.)

basically, long story short, feetman is fucked up. hes pathetic. hes being a huge bitch. at least og gordon feels vaguely sorry for him, and expresses this by way of observing him and trying to treat it. for science. its better than freemind, who just loudly complains about him being a huge bitch and reeking up the place. theres something weird coming from vr gordons corner of the house.....a musky, heady, hormonal kind of thing that makes freemind act simultaneously territorial and irritable and more lascivious than normal. and that also piques og gordons attention, because having both of them be wound up little freaks at the same time is enough to make even the most resilient person pull their hair out

now gordon primes got his suspicions as to whats going on, but hes not gonna tell vr gordon that he suspects hes going into heat. that would compromise the experiment, and all that. so poor gordons just going thru all this shit not knowing what in the fuck is wrong with him and getting more worked up and irritable about it by the day. hes convinced that hes just got the flu, or something......except, uh, haha, jesus christ he is horny all the FUCKING TIME

he doesnt get it! he feels like shit all the time, so why is he constantly fighting off boners and having weird wet dreams and thinking about-- well. his fucking boyfriend, he guesses. (are they boyfriends?? he doesnt know. he gets a weird, sharp pang when he thinks about them not being boyfriends, at this point, but its not like theyve ever talked about it!) gordons half-convinced that hes just losing his mind from being stuck inside all the time and he really just wants to see benrey again. its, like, all he thinks about. (see? hes losing it. theres the proof.)

the sucks thing for everybody else is that gordon is also Extremely Vocal about how shitty he feels and how much he wishes he didnt feel shitty so he could go see benrey and how much he cant stand benrey for not being able to read his mind and come over when he feels bad. eventually freemind gets so sick of his shit that he decides to cut out the middleman and get benrey involved directly. "come take care of your fucking dog before i call the aspca! animal neglect is a crime, asshole!"

(if pressed, freemind would adamantly reject the idea that hes being nice to gordon. but on some level, hes kinda sympathetic. the guys clearly miserable, and he just keeps asking for the same fucking thing. might as well humor him to shut him up.)

vr gordon is completely unaware of these machinations, however. hes just holed up in his room trying to work out what makes him feel better because, uhh, powerade isnt helping

jacking off doesnt do a whole lot for him anymore. like, it feels good, but its not very satisfying. gordon just ends up feeling more restless than anything afterward. and hes always stupid horny. more blankets. a box fan. less blankets. sleeping with one of benreys shirts pressed up to his face. grinding into his pillow when he wakes up hard from yet another weird dream. theyre all a little helpful, and he feels like hes working towards the right thing, somehow, but its never really enough to take the edge off

and then.....he tries......jerking off more. especially when he realizes that its bizarrely soothing to do so while he can smell benrey up close and personal on that stupid shirt of his. better still when he rolls onto his side.....and then his stomach.......rocking his hips into the mattress until he gets the idea to lift his hips a little. and......oh. cool. something kind of......clicks. in his head. as he raises his hips higher while he keeps his arms wrapped around a pillow and benreys shirt jammed against his nose. hes got that lil moment of realization that this is good, actually. this feels like a good move. and its making some of that discomfort melt away

and gordon thinks about.....how it felt. earlier. when they were with barmey. and benrey had him just like this, ass up, face down, and was spreading him apart and licking him open and making him submit and he groans so fucking hard that embarassment just rips through him like lightning. but his tail starting to wag a little faster.....electricity shooting through his belly......and he cant help but wonder. what if benrey had kept going? pulled back and-- maybe, replaced his tongue with his fingers, one at a time, curling them inside him and telling him how well hes behaving and-- and his dick throbs, hard, and gordon realizes he wants fingers inside of himself right fucking now, thank you, hes not fully certain how to accomplish it be he is going to fucking try

(sigh) so my guy figures out about the old fingers in the ass trick. and i need you to understand that i am fully convinced that this is one of those guys who has an uproarious reaction to getting fingers in his ass. mr repressed and uptight over here doesnt really get what the big deal is until he gets braver and pushes a little deeper and hes rock hard in an instant, goodbye, just like everybodys favorite creative writing exercise

and this is what he decides to do for a solid day or two without leaving his room, because, honestly, this is awesome. and the longer he spends jerking off the less time he spends stressing about the fact that his imaginations getting really vivid, here. sure, like, hes no stranger to weird dreams even before this, but this is the first time hes really letting his mind run wild and this dude is nonstop thinking about being bred and gordon still has no fucking idea that hes in heat. doesnt even occur to him

unfortunately this also does not solve his problems but at least it feels baller and it keeps him occupied. also, unfortunately, the increased rate of jerking off is causing a serious uptick in Dog Smells, the effect of which is turning freemind into a nightmare. its just not good vibes in this house. enter: benrey

now i need you to understand that when these two meet up again i want gordon to get Emotional. think about how genuinely excited he gets to see some of his pals in canon. the like......excitement and disbelief when benrey shows up outside his window throwing rocks at it before noclipping in. he forgets to even act pissed off at first. i think it would be super fucking cute for him to drop the game for a moment just out of shock, basically. his tails waggin, his ears are perked up, and hed probably tackle benrey to the ground if he wasnt also a sweaty, trembling mess whos been holed up in his room for days.

and benrey has No Fucking Idea what he has walked in on here. as far as benrey knows, freemind just demanded he get over there and take care of his dog.

(INTERLUDE: here is the part where i gin up a freemind POV of this exact scene. b/c i am out of my fucking mind

so. i had the thought of a freemind POV chapter where hes spying on gordon and benrey.....because. gordons in heat. ive talked about that scenario before too (literally so many FUCKING times okay i just need this dude to have the uncontrollable urge to be bred like a little bitch! and for benrey to take pity on him and make him feel better by nutting in him literally as many times as is physically possible!!!)

but i wanna manifest it in this specific way: from an outside perspective. voyeurism is great and also i have a one track mind and basically the only time i traffic in Other Guys in this fandom anymore is as a participant in gordon and benreys horse shit. Im not apologizing for this

lets say.....vr gordons behavior has been getting worse and worse for "unknown reasons" and freeman prime just sees it as a key observational opportunity for his research. while freeminds getting really irritated at how much its cutting into his normal way of life. for one thing, vr gordons room reeks, and he cant even escape it in his own room! and its turning him into a feisty, aggressive, and loud son of a bitch. but he cant even resolve it in his usual fashion at this point (baiting vr gordon into another competition/fuckfest) b/c gordons being a little sadsack holed up in his room and doesnt wanna play

but also.....he kinda just feels bad for the guy at a certain point. hes clearly really miserable and looks downright ill and all hes asking for is to see his boytoy again. (gordons convinced that hes dying, and feels the need to dramatically speak to benrey one last time before he croaks.) so freemind decides, in all his benevolence, to go over gordon primes head and drag the guy over there anyway. (with machinations, not his literal bare hands. what is he, a caveman?) he reasons that itll be a good opportunity to twist gordons arm into groveling at his feet later

and he spies on the two of them in gordons room.....why? idk. possibly something to do with investigating this relationship between a gordon and a barney that he had yet to fully analyze. tl;dr he gets trapped in their closet for a remix of that one barmey voyeurism chapter b/c why the fuck not

i just.....i dont know.....i think theres something really charming about a 3rd party not being able to fully make out what theyre saying or doing but piecing things together anyway.....like benreys weirdly soft tone of voice when hes talking to a super agitated gordon. as far as any of them know, hes not really like that. he either sounds bored or smug, but either way, its usually straight-up antagonistic

it would make freemind bristle to hear it b/c its almost a mocking tone, but.....it makes gordons shoulders drop and gets him to let go of some of that tension and thats probably fascinating to watch. literally soothing him like a stressed out dog, huh. smoothing back his hair and murmuring things in a low, even tone that freeminds enhanced hearing still isnt good enough to make out. (the guy mumbles, okay? he needs a fucking toastmasters meetup.)

it would equal parts horrify and fascinate freemind, in my onion. watching a version of himself fall that hard into the loyal pet role.....its pathetic! for all that gordon goes on about not being a slave to his instinct or whatever, he sure is doing a bad job of acting like it! its like watching himself, but worse.

and benreys having to soothe him like a startled animal b/c he doesnt even know whats wrong with himself, but theres something thick enough on the air that even benrey can smell it, and hes taking some stabs at the dark. especially with how charged some of the shit gordons saying is......"i cant fucking take it anymore", "you smell so good", "i dont know whats wrong with me, man, my dick hasnt gone down for days and im pretty sure i need a doctor-- no, a real one, not the other gor-- NOT a vet, JESUS"

and the whole time.....freeminds peeking from behind a closet door. watching them devolve from outright hostility into "gordon climbing into benreys lap and shoving one of benreys hands up his shirt and demanding that he fucking touch him already"

normally i dont think freemind would be averse to a little bit of voyeurism, here. if it was anybody else, hed probably at least engage in a little heavy petting. but this is getting weird, man. he cant shake the uncanny feeling that this is something too intimate for him to be watching. for one thing, gordons whimpering like a goddamn dog just from a little necking, and for two, hes never really been the kind of guy to watch people make out for 15 minutes before they get to the good stuff

its just kind of unsettling how much these two clearly really, really like each other at this point. its not like watching gordon prime give vr gordon a handjob as part of a "test". freemind expected more of a hatefuck kind of deal out of these two, what with how often gordons normally going on about how much he hates the guy, what a pain in the ass benrey is, how he just wishes benrey would stop jerking him around.....etc. freemind could shit himself right now. that lying bitch!

i imagine its also kind of painful, on a personal level, for him to watch this borderline-sappy shit. he cant even fathom being on the receiving end of that behavior, let alone from......well. theyve all got their barneys, right? and gordon primes basically doomed himself to incel status b/c he wont nut up and do anything about it. freemind just assumed they were all in the same boat: cursed to casual sex with their roommates/clones, forever, and unable to achieve any kind of intimacy b/c all 3 gordons are fucked up in the exact same way. since theyre all just diff flavors of the same fucking guy, right?

well, theres the evidence that hes wrong. and that vr gordons better than him, somehow. thats gotta suck, bro

anyway then he watches vr gordon get railed in the ass a bunch and jerks off anyway b/c its still hot. see ya)

“take care of your dog”. huh. hes got no clue what that means but, yknow, he does kinda miss his dog. hasnt seen gordon in awhile. and he immediately comments "wow. you look fucked up" in as blunt and unsympathetic a way as possible. but gordons so far gone that he cant even work up a good anger about it. he is pretty fucked up, man. and benrey sits on the bed and slaps his forehead with a palm to take his temperature (and that gets gordon to bitch at him, finally, that thats not how you do it, asshole) and judges that, uh, he is hot. in his expert opinion

and thats when gordon kinda grabs his sleeve and tugs it and starts tryin to say something. hes really bad at it, because he is having to perform the mortifying task of Owning Up To It, but eventually he manages to grind out that he needs benrey to touch him, please. just pet him. something. he feels really bad and he just needs benrey to scratch his fucking ears. this is the most gordon can cop to in one go, and it is such a sad struggle to watch, but benreys caught off guard by it and he feels weirdly bad for gordon upon hearing it so  hes just like "whoa, okay" when gordon tugs his hand to his head

gordon groans the moment his fingernails start scratching behind the ears and digging into his scalp. even just that much feels really fucking good. its comforting, for one thing, and its benrey, for another, and the physical touch feels so fucking good right now that goosebumps are crawling down his neck. gordon cant help but lean against benrey and bury his head in the crook of his shoulder. he wants to hide his face from scrutiny and he wants to get closer but he doesnt know how to say what his fucking problem is

and benreys weirdly quiet. just kinda mumbling and shushing him intermittently, awkward and not sure what to do b/c this is a level of intimacy he was not expecting but gordons sure is responding nicely to a second hand in his hair

so having both of benreys hands scratching at his scalp is really getting to gordon. hes scritchin behind the ears and gordons tails wagging at a mile a minute. the feelings making goosebumps race down his neck and arms. he starts kind of mumbling something into benreys shoulder, how hes been feeling so fucked up lately, and he squirms a little closer. hes not really aiming for anywhere in particular but every neuron thats firing in him right now is telling him to get closer. make contact. he missed the fucking guy, what can he say.

and one of benreys hands......slips down to gordons face. his jaw. a thumb pushing into that soft little divot between his jaw and neck, like hes trying to push up into gordons fucking teeth. its weird and bizarrely intrusive, but benreys hand is broad and warm and gordon leans into it anyway, groaning with relief. its not like its not doing anything for him. kind of the opposite, actually. then he palms at gordons neck, and gordon starts breathing harder. he can feel his heartbeat rabbit-fast, pushing against benreys skin (and theres no way benrey isnt feeling that, too).

benrey eyes are lidded and his breaths starting to get heavier, too. naturally, yknow, since gordons practically draped over him right now, melting all the more the longer benrey keeps petting him. oxytocin is crazy, man, especially when a guys in the full throes of some kind of chemical meltdown of the glands. gordons eyes are screwed shut, tail thumping furiously against the bed, and hes panting at benreys neck like hes a fucking dog.  he just doesnt know how to articulate what the fuck his problem is

benrey smells insanely good to him right now, and gordon just blurts that out. benrey gives him some shit for it, but when gordon only makes a weird noise in response and fists his hands in benreys hoodie, it makes him shut up real quick. hes squeezing out words about feeling like he needs something, but its clearly a fucking effort. its almost pitiful

so. gordons crawled right into benreys lap, too impatient after days and days of feeling like this (you know, being in heat, in so many words). hes been pounding off like crazy, that brand new collar of his strapped to his neck nearly every time b/c hes that desperate to feel… well. *benrey*. he cant fucking jerk off to thoughts of anything else - porn doesnt do it for him, and his fantasies slip right back to the same thing every single time. its frustrating! hes bisexual, for gods sake! its not like hes normally immune to the wiles of the Phat Ass White Girl, but lately he just keeps ending up on his hands and knees and whining benreys name into his pillow and he couldnt focus on a girls rack if he tried

point being. hes being awfully fucking demanding. (and also, hes wearing the collar *right fucking now)*. he shoves benreys hand up his shirt and shivers the moment he makes contact with gordons burning-hot flesh. and hes demanding that benrey touch him already, jesus, hes losing his mind! and benreys just crooning at him, “bossy, huh,” but hes scritching gordons ears and palming at his side and nosing at gordons neck and gordon starts to feel like hes melting into it. his protests at being talked down to are perfunctory at best

benrey licks a stripe up gordons neck and starts muttering his stupid horseshit right in gordons ear and it makes gordon clutch his shoulders so tight, claws digging into the meat of him. benreys kind of into it, though, and it just makes him laugh, low and harsh and right in gordons ear. that just makes gordons problem worse. he lets out quiet, nasal whines on every exhale, like a literal fucking dog.

he starts teasing, like, “haha, you’re *gagging* for it, bro,” but gordon doesnt respond with the defensiveness he expects. instead, its like opening a floodgate - he is, hes fucking *desperate*, okay, his dick hasnt gone down in days and he wants benrey so bad he cant see straight and he cant stop thinking about him and all of this comes tumbling out of him at once. gordons trying to press himself as close to benrey as he can physically get, legs straddling benreys lap and arms clutched tight around his back. and when benrey prods a little more, tells gordon to say what hes been thinkin about, gordon starts to pant, squeezing his eyes shut. but he cant bring himself to do anything more than choke and stutter on the words

hes half-hard in his underwear already (and, lets be be clear, he was only in boxer briefs and a tank top to begin with. hes sweating buckets and its the least amount of clothing he could get away with wearing around the house) and his tails thumping a mile a minute and hes so far gone, just from benrey talking down to him and kissing his neck and scratching his ears. but hes not budging yet, so benrey slides that hand on his ears over to his ponytail and *yanks*. tells him, “speak.” gordons dick twitches rapidly, and he lets out a sharp sound, and he finally says it: he needs benrey to *fuck* him, jesus

benrey lets out a harsh breath at that. “yeah? thats what puppy wants?” and the nickname should blister him, make him feel to embarrassed to continue, but gordons too desperate to care. he just starts spewing a litany of “god yes”s and “please”s. hes getting harder and harder, pressed up against benreys belly, and benrey can *feel* it. “good boy,” he mutters, and those claws dig harder, that panting gets louder and harsher

he slips a hand around to gordons back, rubbing slowly for a moment as if to soothe him, and then slides it under the back of gordons boxers. and lower still. starts rubbing at gordons hole. that gets a quiet “oh god” out of gordon.

gordon cant help himself - he rocks forward against benrey, just a little, rubbing his bulge against what he realizes is benreys *extremely* hard dick in his sweatpants. hes not the only one whos got it bad. but he *is* the only one whispering, “fuck, fuck, fuck,” as benrey pushes a little further, makes as if hes about to breach gordon dry. the poor guys so needy that he probably wouldnt even argue!

but benrey just stares at him, wide eyed and flushed, mouth hanging open a little. gordons so hot for this that it surprises the both of them.

anyway after some boring position finagling benrey coaxes gordon onto his hands and knees, running a broad hand down gordons shaking back. and he pulls back gordons tail, exposing him. its so fucking humiliating - gordons got his face buried in a pillow, and his ass in the air, and hes never felt so *vulnerable* before. he wants to argue, he wants to lift his head and look back to make sure that everythings, like, okay back there - benreys staring at his entire asshole, okay, and he wasnt exactly anticipating benrey making a house call to fuck him in the ass - but every time he lifts his head, or starts to say something neurotic about it, benrey chides him about it. clicks his tongue. tells him, “hey. dogs dont talk” or “i said *bow*, bro”.

for all his insisting that hes a real guy, that hes not just a dog, gordons feeling less and less like a human and more like something in thrall to his instincts. the condescension rankles like it always does, but doing what benrey tells him to feels good. feels natural. presenting himself like this feels like what hes *supposed* to do. it doesnt stop him from running his mouth entirely, but it helps to mitigate some of the embarrassment.

and then… benrey *licks*. gordon tenses and gasps. he doesnt know how benrey can stand it, its gotta be, like, unhygienic! but that didnt scare him off the last time they tried this, and its not like gordon hasnt thought about it since. hes thought about it a lot, actually. but hes been too neurotic to ask for it. benreys not stupid, though. hes a good dog owner (at least, so he thinks) and hes gonna take care of his dog. so he licks again, and again, pressing a little harder against gordons hole on each pass with the broad side of his tongue until he dares to breach it with the tip.

gordons rock hard again in an instant. his dick hangs between his legs and drips onto the sheets. he digs his fingers into the pillow now, tearing holes in its surface with those sharp nails of his, and he makes embarrassingly high noises that he muffles into into the pillow, too. hes tense, hes so fucking tense, he should be clamping down and making benreys task really fucking hard, but theres bright pink sweet voice dripping from his hole and benreys rubbing the side of his thigh in an effort to soothe him and both of these things work in tandem to get him to relax. and benrey works his tongue in further, further than a human ought to.

the tip was one thing, but it gets wider as benrey pushes it in, and its just as good as it was before - better, even, because now its just the two of them, just a master and his dog, and benreys the only one he wants to see him like this. bent over and whimpering. he cant— he cant stomach the thought of anybody else doing this to him. hell, there was a point once where the idea of stomaching *benrey* doing this to him would have made him laugh. but here he is. benreys fucking him open with his tongue and pressing against something thats making him see stars and gordon just wants *more*. he says it so sweet, too, voice growing hoarse and raw as he begs benrey to just fucking do it already, he doesnt wanna come like this!

gordon gets so worked up and emotional about it that benrey takes the time to scratch behind his ears again, shushing him and telling him to chill. benreys got him. hes been a good dog, and good dogs get treats. hearing the words “good dog” makes gordons entire body flush. thats all he wants, really. he wants to be a good dog. he wants to be *told*. he blurts out, “oh my god— say it again,” and benreys like, “huh? say what? youre gonna have to be more specific,” clicking the last syllable. it makes all the hairs on gordons head rise and prickle with shame. the best he can do is mumble it into his pillow.

benrey hears it, though, and tugs at gordons collar from behind, just enough to raise his head. “whassat? you want me to call you a good boy?” gordon cant bring himself to answer that directly, but his stupid body betrays him by making him whine. jesus christ, yes, thats all he WANTS! he needs benrey to be good and nice to him for once in his fucking life and give him what he wants instead of taking, taking, taking! but benrey just tells him that hes gonna have to earn it. gonna have to be *real* good for him. gordon could fucking snarl at that, but benreys pulling back to rub his dick between gordons cheeks and against his hole and that shuts him up pretty fast because hes *so close* to getting what he wants and hes not about to fuck it up now by running his big dumb mouth

and then… he starts to push in. that sweet voice has loosened gordon up enough to take even benrey, who, uh, is definitely the bigger of the two, in that regard. he goes slow, uncharacteristically so, and gordons chest heaves with the force of how hard hes breathing. a quiet string of “oh god”s spills out of him as he tries to crane his neck back to watch. the head breaches him with a strange popping sensation, and benrey groans, loud, as the rest of him slides in with little resistance in comparison. “good,” he pants in turn, “youre takin it so good,” and—

and gordon comes, in weak, aborted spurts. it snuck up on him. he clenches so fucking tightly that it winds benrey a little. he breathes out, “whoa. did you—” but gordon just begs him to shut up, keep going, hes not— hes not done yet, its always like this, its not *enough*. his dick barely even flags afterward, it just hangs there, achingly hard and dripping with cum. benrey cant even find it in himself to make fun of him. he wants it so fucking bad, doesnt he? and he feels so good, so fucking tight and slick around benrey that the only thought running through his head is “gotta take care of my dog gotta fuck my best friend gotta nut in him and make him howl”. so he pushes himself alllll the way in until theyre pressed together, skin to skin.

then he starts to move. slow, careful thrusts, more for benreys benefit than gordons. if hes not careful, hes gonna blow his load, right then and there, and hes trying to make it good for gordon, too, okay? unlike *some* of them, hes not gonna bust in two minutes and then spend the next half hour crying and trauma-dumping to the guy hes still got his dick inside of.

once he thinks hes got a grip, though, benrey starts fucking him in earnest, and that changes gordons vocalizations from weak little whimpers into something louder. less restrained. hes given up any pretense of being quiet so that his other selves dont hear that hes snuck his boytoy into his room. just loud, wordless moans on each thrust, initially muffled into the pillow but soon spilling into the wider room when he turns his head to catch his breath. the only words hes managing are “oh god” and “please” and “benrey, benrey, *benrey*”, and benrey just responds to him like, “yeah? thats good? fuuuck, bro, so good for me,” all short of breath and barely able to speak himself

he wants to see gordons face. he *needs* to see gordons face. needs to see what hes doing to him, needs to see that cute fuckin blush of his. so he tugs on gordons collar again, bringing him to his hands and knees properly instead of that bowing position. and then further still - pulls him back so that benreys on his knees, and gordons on his knees in turn, on his lap, cock still buried inside of him and fucking him in short, hurried thrusts. “paws up,” benrey tells him, and gordon does it. instantly. no resistance. just folds them at his chest like a real dog would.

“whos a good boy?” benrey croons, right in his ear again. gordon gasps, “i-i am!”

“yeah? youre a good boy?” nod, wail. “whose— whose good boy are you?”

and gordon chokes on his response. he cant say it, he *cant*, he doesnt want to be benreys but he does, he *does*. he doesnt want to be benreys because its not fucking fair! he cares so fucking much! so much more than benrey does, it feels like, obsessing over the guy like hes wrapped thorny vines all around gordons heart and he cant so much as shift in his seat without feeling the tug and the ache and thinking of benrey again. and benrey doesnt care, he never fucking cares, except—

except he showed up at gordons house, in his room. without even being asked. like he knew something was wrong. and he— hes always talking to gordon, shooting him stupid texts just to make him laugh. scheduling *date nights* for them. date nights where, yeah, maybe they couldnt see each other in person, and maybe they always end in some kind of depraved sexual act, but its not like gordons not into it. hes frighteningly into it, actually. and hes *so* into hearing benreys voice, low and crooning, right in his ear, and seeing him lean on an elbow and smile at him afterward. its— its practically genuine. and benreys always making excuses to talk with him, do things with him, watch stupid fucking movies that only gordon cares about and stream with him on twitch to help boost his subscriber count and—

and—

oh god. maybe he *does* care. that might be more terrifying than the alternative.

then benrey yanks the collar again. presses the whole of gordons back against his front in one hot, unbroken line. and asks, “i said, whose good boy are you, bro? *speak.*”

“benrey,” he blurts out, a ragged moan, “d-dont make me sa-AY it, oh god—”

“no?” benrey stills suddenly. his hands keep gordon stuck in place, unable to move or bounce or feel benrey shift inside of him. “thats, uh… thats too bad, friend. this trains for good boys only. good dogs go to heaven 2. no bad dogs allowed. gonna have to, uhh, escort you off—”

“im not a bad dog!”

“i dunno, gordo. bein’ kind of, uh… disobedient.”

(sorry. thats all i got . byeeee)

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

Tommy’s (and Tubbo’s) Character /rp /dSMP

This is a bit of a rant so like be warned. I have nothing against any CCs mentioned in this, this is all roleplay, lighthearted, and just a bit of fun analysis. Mostly this is a ramble about how I see certain people analysing Tommy’s character on tumblr and twt, and why I think they’re wrong. This isn’t directed at anyone specific, just a trend I’ve been seeing that kinda irks me. I don’t dislike the fandom, just a few ‘takes’ have been really weird for me.

TW for everything below: analysing the effects of trauma, abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, and lack of therapy.

I’m not really liking how victim-blamey everyone is getting currently in the dSMP, both in fandom and canon. In canon with certain characters but especially in fan analysis posts and especially about Tommy and Tubbo. People legitimately celebrating that Tommy might start ‘apologising’ for his actions more and 'growing as a person' somehow don’t realise that hes been made this way through a tonne of negative reinforcement. abuse, and gaslighting. And people blaming Tubbo for actions he had no choice in, rather than the actions he did choose.

Currently, as I see it, Tommy is so scared that anyone would find a reason to be pissed off at him that his fighting spirit has been completely crushed. He was exiled and abused when he should have been helped and given an understanding figure to guide him and teach him how to deal with things non-violently. In everyone’s eyes, the problem was that Tommy was creating violence with no real reason, acting recklessly and commiting crimes. Tubbo, having made him a part of his cabinet, knew that this would only harm the country. So instead of talking to him reasonably, he got angry, put him on trial, and punished him with the logbook (humiliating him by making him report back to Fundy, which he obviously hated). Tommy’s actions were, of course, bad, but did he deserve everyone ganging up on him? No. Especially when Tubbo was supposed to be in his corner, helping him out like he always said he would (”It’s me and you vs Dream” etc). This is the first betrayal of trust from Tommy’s POV. He doesn’t understand what he did wrong to its full extent, and no one can explain it to him. 

However, Tubbo was under a lot of pressure from Dream and George, and he’s a literal child President, so his ‘safety over friendship’ actions are understandable. I don’t believe Tubbo is solely to blame for anything he’s done in season 2, but it can’t all be excused. If you are to blame Tommy for his recklessness, you have to blame Tubbo, at least partially, for his disregard for Tommy’s feelings and mental state. There were other ways to go about the entire thing, including the trial, which was just horrible to watch, and agreeing to give Dream the disc, something Tommy gave him in pure confidence that it would be safe with Tubbo. Yikes moment.

At that time, Tubbo knew a lot of things about Tommy. In fact, he probably knew the most about Tommy out of anyone on the server. He knew the discs were incredibly important and a comfort item for Tommy. He knew Tommy had trauma from being exiled in the past. He knew Tommy was abused, or at least manipulated by Wilbur, in addition to growing up in war. Wilbur once told Tommy to stop being reckless, and Tommy listened, changing his attitude because he looked up to Wilbur so much. Then Wilbur said ‘let’s be the bad guys’ and stopped trying to mentor Tommy. There’s a conflict here, because Tommy was told by Wilbur that he wasn’t good enough to be President (links to the idea of ‘not being strong enough’) but he knows that Wilbur was a bad person. But Tommy is never given the chance to reconsile his feelings surrounding Wilbur, both because of Ghostbur and because of the conflict he starts with George. So he is harbouring a mixture of emotions about his mentor and brother, not understanding how to untangle the ‘real Tommy’ from the manipulated boy he became. 

What was going through his head when he stole from George and griefed him? Perhaps the thought that he needed to show he was still the same old Tommy. Maybe the need to ‘prove himself’ as a strong person? It could have just been an outlet for his trauma. He’s grown up in a world where everyone is either a friend or an enemy. George isn’t a friend. How was he supposed to know that hurting him was bad?

Tubbo was pressured into the actions he took against Tommy, but he was pressured far too easily. There is no moment where Tubbo turns to Tommy and makes sure he’s okay, he views him as ‘selfish’ and overdramatic, and sees his actions that way. This makes sense from Tubbo’s POV, he’s struggling to be President in ways that Wilbur *knew* he would, but in Tommy’s eyes this is the worst betrayal he’s ever known. The moment Tubbo (rightfully, but poorly executed) defies Tommy’s plan to hire Technoblade (ahem, seeing Techno as a weapon again) and exiles Tommy is the moment their friendship shatters. They’re two people who don’t understand each other anymore. Two people who are technically in the right, but only hurt each other. 

What Tommy needed was a therapist, instead he had Dream, who put out the fire of rebellion that made him so strong, and Techno, who was trying to help but doing it in the wrong way. 

People see tommy's change post-exile as a good thing because he's not as rebellious anymore and he’s thinking things through a lot before he does them, but they will soon realise that his rebellion was one of his best traits and the fact that no one saw it as anything but a problem really shows. He now second-guesses himself so much and is so scared of being wrong that everything seems too difficult and too dangerous. Every trait can have a positive and negative side. Tommy's defiant nature would have made him the perfect negotiator with a little practise. In fact, he had plenty of good ideas before he was exiled (using spirit against Dream, though it didnt work in the end, for example). The negative side of this was recklessness and the desire to cause problems on purpose, but what he needed was a friend (looking at you Tubbo) who understood that hes been through several wars, was manipulated by Wilbur, and hasnt known a time of peace where everyone who wasnt on his side was out to kill him. Now that ‘fight’ is gone he's just become easier to manipulate.

He may be getting better (see: telling Dream to go fuck himself) but there hasn't been any long-term growth because he was never told what kind of rebellion was good and what was bad. He was just told it was all bad. By Dream (and by Tubbo). Who he doesn't trust. So he's just going to revert back to his old ways because no one told him what was bad in a way that didn't make him feel like everyone was against him. Dream is the enemy (though Tommy’s feelings towards him are complicated, they make his brain go all ‘flippy floppy’) and Dream told him that rebellion was bad, so rebellion must be good always, right? 

And then there's Techno. Techno did nothing wrong except for when he did. Techno is 100% right except for when he isn’t. He doesn't understand Tommy because Tommy was never fully open about what Dream had done and how it affected him. That's not Tommys fault though, because who the fuck openly talks about their trauma? So neither of them are to blame for pretty much anything up until the confrontation at the community house. 

However, Techno's methods and ideology were not what Tommy needed. He was thrown from one extreme to another over and over again, from complete subservience to total rebellion. Neither of these inforce good attitudes in Tommy. One, as stated before, makes it so that he will regain his negative traits again. The other reinforces those violent traits as good, just like Wilbur did. The only difference is that Techno had good intentions, he wasnt trying to use Tommy, which is why he feels so used when Tommy 'betrays' him (Techno doesnt realise that he himself betrayed Tommy by teaming with Dream, he sees it more as a transaction than a personal thing). Techno feels so hurt by Tommy ‘viewing him as a weapon’ that he goes on with his no-mercy attack, completely dropping Tommy at his lowest point. 

Tommy says he doesn't want to be like everyone he's hated. In fact, he say's he is 'worse' than all the villains. This is very obviously untrue, though he was clearly going down a dangerous path with Techno's influence (see: bullying Fundy, spawning wither, kidnapping Connor, and saying that the discs are more important than Tubbo, more on that later). He's not a villain but who exactly has said he's not a villain. Dream? Techno? Neither of them can be trusted in his eyes. They say he's a good guy, Wilbur wanted to be the bad guy, who's right? He doesn't know. He has a crisis of morality. 

And? Some people want to point at that and say 'aha! Character development! He's finally realising his actions have a negative affect on others!' OH GOD NO??? He's a *child* who thinks that he is worse than his abuser. Does that sound like positive character growth to you? 

Lastly, the discs. We know theyre a comfort item blahblahblah. He hates himself for valuing them more than he values Tubbo. He's literally innocent in this. He’s been horribly manipulated by Dream to believe that the discs are worth anything. Theyre really not worth anything if they are being used as tools rather than, yknow, discs. My poor boy. He doesnt trust people, so what can he trust? The discs. But then he says it out loud and realises he misses Tubbo and he wants to be with his best friend again and and and WAHHHH. This also isnt really character growth its just fucking sad leave me alone. 

Anyways what the fuck guys. @ Niki and Jack what the fuck. Yeah we get it it’s miscommunication but wtf. Kinda worried that the actual lore will make Niki and Jack’s hatred of Tommy justified in some way and take on a big victim-blamey vibe, but I’m hoping that everyone is smart enough to not do that. I cannot praise Tommy enough for how he’s portrayed his character. I’m currently hoping that he himself understands the true complexity of it all. I’m sure he does.

Mostly though im actually pissed off at all the people praising tommy's character for 'maturing' when hes literally just got trauma. Nice one, tumblr and twt users. Thanks. Great job. He hasnt 'learnt his lesson', he’s traumatised. What the fuck.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk, leave your responses in the reblogs and comments.

[daaziscoolbesties]

[REPOST] MY 2K WORD COMMENTARY/ANALYSIS OF RANBOO’S LORE STREAM

‼️‼️This post contains lore spoilers from Ranboo’s 4/23 stream, “The Enderwalk Saga. Chapter 1: The Lessons”. If you haven’t seen that stream don’t read ahead unless you want spoilers‼️‼️

disclaimer: this isnt really an analysis as much as a bunch of commentary and half-baked theories.

-on the way to the mansion he was sort of talking to himself saying stuff like "i'm good i'm good" which m a y be a normal thing but also maybe it's not and it flew over our heads cause he talks to chats and donos like that so often

-again, this one may just be a normal thing but when he was climbing up the stairs in the mansion looking for foolish, he repeats some of his words like down to the exact same tone of voice and everything. 12:42,  "this mansion is way too big actually. this mansion is way too big actually." (why the repeated actually? seems odd to me but again it might just be a normal thing that i haven't picked up on). (right after) "okay okay lemme find him lemme find him" again repeated words in the e x a c t same tone.

-does everyone know about ranboo's silk touch hands ability thing? or was that just a techno and ranboo main character moment. bc if it was, how would foolish know that ranboo could pick up the full cake after it'd been partially eaten. unless everyone on the sever knows about that in which case this means nothing. but if they d o n t know... how would foolish know? ranboo wrote about it in the do not read book so maybe if it's not a publicly known thing maybe foolish got his hands on the book and read it??

-14:53-ish, they're talking about the war room and how it was for tubbo or whatever and ranboo says, and i quote "he prepares for lore but he's never gonna do it." now funny thing is at first i couldn't tell if he said "war" like in reference to the war room or "lore". but after playing the clip over and over i can say with ALMOST 100% certainty that he said lore. there is a definite L sound at the beginning of the word. which either means a) this was a slip up (doubtful bc he said later that there were no mistakes), b) he broke the fourth wall because they were supposed to be rping at that point, or c) i'm completely wrong and he said "war" which leads down an entire other road of possibilities

-15:17 "are you a book reader?" "*checks inventory for do not read book* uh yeah i'd say i'm a book reader-" dunno how i didn't catch this the first time I HATE THAT DAMN BOOK

-15:18 there's blue in his hotbar. where did he get the blue.

-16:40 "it's like a metaphor- i have two minds: i have my normal self, my normal little shift-dancing self, and then the builder one. the builder one is demanding. it's a very demanding mind." ranboo then lets out a weird sigh after this. i feel like what foolish was talking about was an indirect(?) parallel to ranboo in and out of enderwalk, there's how he normally is, trying to do best for others, and then there's enderwalk, meeting up with bad guys and "demanding" things (its very late as i write this i really don't know what i'm talking about)

-17:11 "you have your panic closet" i'm sorry his what now 😀 no but seriously how the hell did i miss some of these

-18:04 "you're asking me if i remember?" very funny ranboo thank you for making jokes in these trying times

-18:25 WHY DID HE GET OUT THE AXE WHEN STARING AT THE BEE

-19:38 why did foolish hold the grass block- most of these observations probably mean nothing but- h u h - is that- i'm too tired for this

-19:54 "i never properly thanked you for the deal you made with me" so foolish got something out of this deal, we're not sure if ranboo did. "the green cardboard box" again do you mean dream's house- but seriously the only people i can think of on the server that are associated with green are dream and sam. and i have no idea what cardboard box could be referring to.  foolish got a lime colored shulker from drista

-20:30 "we're supposed to only talk about it at a certain location" hmm now where would that be? panic room maybe? cause like usually after doing a big thing in the enderwalk state ranboo wakes up in the panic room so maybe?  the deal was that they only talk about it in his house

-21:52 how does ranboo receive(?) the lessons? like are they whispered to him in his mind or is he seeing them as words in front of him like we see? hmm

-"Lesson 14: If you have the opportunity to gain a favor, take it." "gain a favor" don't you usually ask people for favors though? how does one "gain a favor"? anyways i'm pretty sure lesson 14 has to do with the deal foolish was talking about. (the deal explained because i now have info: at some point a bit ago foolish met up with ranboo and asked to make a deal, he'd gotten a shulker box from drista. the deal was that ranboo would have ownership of the box, it would be under his name but foolish rents/borrows it indefinitely. ranboo negotiated that if he took ownership of the box he would get a "war favor"  from foolish where if something happens that creates sides, ranboo can ask him a favor that could change his side. but why would foolish want ranboo to have ownership of the shulker you may ask? well i have an answer for you. a theory actually but still. basically since drista technically isn't supposed to give out shit on the server if someone where to have that stuff then they may get in trouble. foolish wants to be able to use the shulker but if it gets found he doesn't want to get in trouble, so he can blame it on ranboo seeing as it's under his name.)

-22:16-ish "i still have this from when you *can't understand whats said here*" well i guess that sort of explains why he had the grass block? idk man (info update: he had the grass block from when ranboo threw it at him telling him to calm down like what ghostbur does with blue)

-31:35 "i figured out how to cause it" how to cause the enderwalk state

-38:30 "ninety three lessons" I STILL DONT KNOW WHY HE KEPT SAYING NINETY THREE AND NOT NINETY FOUR AND ITS DRIVING ME CRAZY LMAO

-39:01 "it's all for the greater good" okay well when are you gonna start thinking about yourself and not everyone else for once huh. self care bitch.

-40:31 he started holding the axe when he was looking at sam- gonna say it i really don't like that axe ahahah- WAIT A DAMN MINUTE THE AXE IS NAMED "axe of ender" I DONT LIKE THAT I DONT LIKE THAT AT ALL

-41:53 is there something?? physically keeping him from telling sam??? or maybe it's sort of like his enderwalk state taking control to make him shut the fuck up??? so many questions and approximately zero answers

-43:18 ranboo raising his voice legitimately scares me 😀👍

-"Lesson 27: Do not reminisce on what you have lost for it will weigh you down." showed up when he was thinking about and REMINISCING about the community house 👀👀

-"Lesson 53: Never fully trust anyone." showed up literally after he said that he thinks he can trust the other people on the server enough to tell them about what he did

-"Lesson 67: Leave no evidence of what you have helped with." this is different from the others because there doesn't seem to be at least a semi-direct connection to it? unless maybe at the time ranboo was near something he may have "helped with"? not sure about this one

-"Lesson 94: DO NOT LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE" yeah yeah i get it i get it he's fucked up some shit in enderwalk i don't feel like analyzing this thanks

-OH OH NOTICE HOW HE SAYS "REMEMBERING" WHEN THE LESSONS SHOW UP. IMPLYING THAT THIS ISNT A NEW THING, ITS HAPPENED BEFORE AND NOW HES REMEMBERING IT. MAYBE HE WROTE DOWN THE LESSONS WHEN HE WAS IN ENDERWALK AND NOW THAT HES BEEN EXPERIMENTING ITS BEEN EASIER FOR HIM TO REMEMBER THOSE ENDERWALK MEMORIES

-okokok the experiments are that he's been e x p e r i m e n t i n g on how to purposefully induce the enderwalk state. and we know now that it wasn't from the pain of the water because on the stream afterwords he said that it's caused by the intense fear of something happening. and so the "side effects" of the experiments is that since he's in enderwalk more often(?) he starts remembering more things from it

-OH MY GOD WAIT "there is a reason sam, there's so many reasons, theres ninety three of them" (44:47) WHAT IF EVERY LESSON IS TIED TO A QUOTE UNQUOTE "reason" THAT RANBOO THINKS HES A BAD PERSON/NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP BUT HE SAYS NINETY THREE INSTEAD OF NINETY FOUR BECAUSE THE NINETY FOURTH LESSON DOESNT HAVE A REASON YET/HE DOESNT REMEMBER IT HAVING A REASON

-dude honestly the whole sam part hurts so much this man is scarily good at acting

-46:46 "i cant put you in the prison you wouldn't be able to see michael anymore" bestie that's the point he doesn't want to accidentally hurt michael or tubbo in the enderwalk state—

-okay but there's no way that sam couldn't tell that ranboo was at least TRYING to confess to something- i feel like he definitely knows more than he's letting on because usually like when people do bad shit or admit to doing bad shit he's like in Prison Guard Mode™️ (he literally cut off ponk's arm because he stole some keycards or something) and whatever and idk what he knows but he definitely knows something and is trying to protect ranboo. or he's trying to manipulate him or smth either one works—

-50:38 "you are a good person" "i am?" you can hear my heart shatter. "yes you are" "i don't think so sam" "i do, even if you don't" "i really don't think so" and there it goes again

-51:25 hello badboyhalo i see you to the left of ranboo

-52:44 "but then my curiosity got the best of me" curiosity killed the cat, bitch

-52:54 "there's ninety three, ninety four, ninety- theres so many reasons!" SEE!! NOT ONLY ARE THERE THAT MANY LESSONS THERE ARE REASONS THAT CORRESPOND IM S O SMART—

-52:56 "i don't want to remember anymore!" *quietly brings forth my theory that when ranboo loses a canon life his memory gets wiped*

-53:13 "ive opened pandora's box" isn't the prison?? literally called pandora's VAULT??? so this m a y be a stretch but i'm thinking that maybe this could be taken in the literal sense that he "opened" the prison and let dream out (the sirens at the end of quackity's stream confirm that dream is indeed out)

-53:42 mans just straight up walked through a ghost i—

-55:37 so are we just gonna ignore the eleventh page of the book? "he's alive, but hopefully soon dream won't be"??? alright nevermind it's most likely bc when tommy came back he recruited ranboo in his plan to kill dream

-55:47 notice how he writes "what am i?" as opposed to "who am i?" no elaboration here idk what it could be

-56:08 just so it's clear for anyone who doesn't know- he's wearing armor at this point, and i'm like 90% sure that when he wears his armor water can't hurt him. and i saw someone say somewhere that like with splash potions when thrown it turns into a gas-like thing? so again, it didn't hurt him, he didn't get hurt. he said in the chill stream that he wasn't comfortable making it where his character had to hurt himself to do that. the thing that causes the enderwalk isn't pain, it's intense and sudden emotions like fear and stress. thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

[icecreamkink]

so i watched cobra kai all in two days and i have so many -

this show has so many cool and smart angles to it, but the same time.... its so stupid oh my god everyone is so dumb literally mr miyagi held all of the braincells in this whole universe 

like i am but at the same time i am not surprised it was made like this, bc in hindsight of course there were hordes of ppl simping over johnny lawrence ....  but it still amuses me that this is like... an Actual Official Thing

ok this will get long so cut it is

how much fun this cast has is super visible and i love it

i rly enjoy how the world was expanded ! i did grow up watching the karate kid movies, so watching how they progressed the world of the movies so organically was pretty cool. it rly feels like its the same universe

i fucking LOVE stories that are largely about a Thing. dancing ,skating, sports its just so thrilling to experience this all consuming relationship people can have with this type of activity? and martial arts are just that much more intense, so yeah, grown ass men kicking each other around at the lightest provocation and a war veteran caring so much abt teen karate is Ridiculous.... but i love it all because thats the intensity i find so thrilling

was kinda surprised with how much im missing mr. miyagi. first because, like everyone is so unhinged jesus christo, it just really throws into relief how much his character grounded the narrative of the movies. but also hes just a really great character

and on that note it rly Gets Me that the show itself aknowledges that and plays that into daniels angst and all the little ways they sorta weave myiagisms into the whole show........ im not getting emotional over this dumb karate dads show OK

related - i really miss hearing ‘daniel-san’ 🥺🥺

ACE DEGENERATE oh god oh no

they really went down the down and out johnny lawrence route huh. like i was always kinda bummed we see kreese choking him and then we never see him again in the movies, and while i love dumpster fire problematic trash himbo ck johnny, its like......................... actually really sad that his life turned out like this fjngn

everytime i hear ‘babes’ and ‘pussy’ i die a little inside. i know thats the point but i am a v cringe easy person, have mercy (ehe)

loved the way they are constantly drawing parallels between johnny and mr. myiagi of all people. hes the handy man of his building that has a bullied kid asking for help and eventually steps up to teach them karate, beats up a bunch of bullies for him, creates a friendship with said kid, estranged from family, drinks his sorrows away, surprisingly one of the least quick to anger characters (which says more about everyone else really but.... Well.), no schemes or ulterior motives hes just tryna vibe here.... oh and ofc magically heals miguel of is asthma apparently. the true disciple.. meanwhile daniel is his usual messy petty self even tho he wants to be mr myiagi so bad 

also interesting about that is how miguels character is a parallel of both johnny and daniel at the same time

overall the parallels in ck are done really well, drawing comparisons and also subverting them constantly. theyre well thought out

THE PARALELOGRAMS

fr tho, the angle being explicitly the cycle of trauma and its effects and how trumatized adults in turn traumatize kids, maliciously or not, is so interesting

but! on the flip side of that, it feels like the writers are getting in their own way @ letting the characters grow. especially this last season. theres only so many times you can do "johnny and daniel are getting along but 5mins later they are (literally) fighting over some dumbass random issue" or "johnny puts in 20% of effort with robby and then gives up" before it gets on your nerves yknow?

i see daniel no longer talks like macchio ingested 15 shots of espresso before every take and idk how to feel about that tbh

interesting tension in daniel, as in, in tkk mr miyagi was there and daniel was frankly, kind of a lil shit, this messy petty spitfire hot tempered sassy kid,(johnny lawrence voice: just... stop being so annoying) but now hes the adult, and he wants to be mr. miyagi... but hes just not, and never will be to his very core and it shakes him and in a way hes trying to find who he is now that he sees himself in a position to be a not! cobra kai figure. i kinda really like that 

plus how that relates to his cobra kai trauma. idk if the writers thought abt it Like That, i think so, but in any case, its interesting bc it seems like daniel has told everyone whod listen about johnny lawrence his Pretty Boy Karate Rival and high school and 84 cobra kai... But. no one seems to know what went on in 85 (or 86? idk) which was just so much worse

like ye og cobras were shitheads, but tkk iii is just two hours of daniel being emotionally and physically tortured. 

like, the third movie is.............chaotic, to put it nicely, and many people ignore it, but the writers clearly didnt. daniels actions are, in a way, responding so much more to the events of tkk iii than to the first movie ie. johnny himself, AND. daniel doesnt rly seem to have dealt with that trauma? he never told sam? doesnt feel like hes ever told amanda? he doesnt even say terrys name out loud? freaks Out over kreese ? the way he reacts to robbys deceit? his FACE when he walks past the new "fear does not exist in this dojo" paint or kreeses photo? hmMm i sense Pain

his fashion tho........... disappointing. where are the flower shirts daniel huh we had one (1) shirt what a tragedy STOP WEARING SUITS ALL THE TIME . also the band ts/grunge bi are a look for johnny but part of me longs for the preppy lovable 80s bully chic johnny lawrence getups

weird that they never used that last moment of karate kid where johnny kinda... snaps out of his anger and hands daniel the trophy almost in tears. like “youre alright larusso, good match” “thanks a lot”  that being their last direct interection seems like itd be perfect fruit for cobra kai but... they just dont. weird. 

especially when, the FIRST SCENE they see each other, suposedly in 30+ years, the first thing to come out of daniels mouth is QUOTE "u still got those golden locks huh?" WHO SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT DANIEL FUCKING SAN 

also amandas immediate reaction "your pretty boy rival?" like. can we talk about the fact that daniel had to have imparted to his wife the very important information that his high school bully/karate rival was like Really Cute and Fucking Hot Actually

 the writers Knew exactly what they were doing and honestly.............. power to them

tkk director voice: and billy was just so cute  

also I was thinking that daniel sounded strangely fond in that first scene, and i wonder if he developed a weird affection for johnny on the grounds that of all of his Karate Rivals johnny was actually the only one who didn’t actively tried to literally kill him

i was actually delightedly surprised with how great the chemistry between them is, like from the get go i am Invested. their rl friendship totally bleeds through and its fantastic

. granted, idiots enemies to lovers friends is my Thing so i am biased  

johnny lawrence: i am down in the dumps, i fucked up my whole life and my sons probably, largely in light of the trauma that the father figure sensei and the philosophy of my karate inflicted on me and all my friends. u know what i should do, as a traumatized, unreliable mess of an adult? teach that same philosophy to some other kids! what could go wrong! 

but really i enjoy the setup of it. i kinda like that i watched it late because, season 1 was johnny setting himself up for failure in a way and it was exciting to watch it all go to shit sjfn

Like. his heart might be in the right place, but theres just.... not a way to teach something like ‘strike hard, no mercy’ and not have it fuck up a kid 

case and point: aisha, miguel and hawk become annoying as all hell over that bullshit in the end of s1, even before shit gets truly fucked up

billys subtle panicked eyes when he sees hawk and miguel fighting dirty in the all valley was SO GOOD especially in parallel with the panic that is so visible in his face in the movie when kreese tells bobby to injure daniel and in the sweep the leg scene 

seen people question wether kreese should have returned and i absolutely think he needed to. johnny needed to realize that cobra kais fundamentals are flawed, at the root, beyond kreese himself being a toxic piece of shit 

also who are we kidding? we are here to see the tkk characters play on new playgrounds!

i get what they're doing abt kreeses backstory, ( also. cobra kai. pq eles caem nas cobras djjs sorry) but did it need to take up that much time? feels like they couldve  done it in half the run time and developed some other stories better 

martin kove has such an evil eye. i love it

love that we get a good follow up to kreese breaks johnnys trophy and tries to CHOKE HIM in the parking lot, which happened in the movie and then....................... was never mentioned again

“the gang is all back together again” aaaa u piece of SHIT 

also. terry silver is definetely appearing ha ha ha PAIN i cant wait

seen ppl say kreese was too much of a cartoon villain like..........................oh......... sweetie........... u dont even Know

interested how johnny will fit into that bc kreese was simping rly hard for johnny here. like i did not expect him to be so adamant to have him with cobra kai ... under his control, sure, but he really wants johnny by his side despite already having control of the dojo and how will terry silver self appointed jon kreeses forever simp going to feel abt that? 

like bitchs dropping by every episode like ‘joooooohnny ..... come bacc to me joooonny......... this ur last warning! for real this time johnny! i wont say it again! watch me ! im leaving johnny! im rly leaving ! im dragging a chair” and johnny is just like. dont let the door hit ya bitch it was so funny pls

and on that subject oof, johnny! doesnt! Know! he doesnt get that side of daniels cobra kai trauma. and i kind of.............. cannot wait for ck 2021 johnny lawrence to meet terry silver like. what a shit show i need a front row seat and popcorn (imagine terry tries some greasy charm and johnny just roundhouse kicks him in the teeth bc he just doest Not Have the Patience for This. glorious)

feels like we, as a society, should acknowledge that cobra kai will never die................ bc their sense of design is just chefs kiss. their name is COBRA KAI. they have sexie sleeveless black gis. theyve sneks. colorful leather jackets with embroided naja insignia, the get ppl thru the aesthetics. evil geniuses

the flashback cuts : masterpiece behavior

the other takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the differente angles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE CLOSE UP ON JOHNNYS FACE AT THE KICK 

that scene of daniel and johnny vibing to 80s music in the car. just. oh my god. the fan wish fullfilment. no thoughts head empty.

the new characters! theyre .... good. but. idk. i really like miguel (save for the annoying phase mid s1 - end s2) and amanda, who is a damn riot and has some functioning braincells, but everyone else is       

like dont get me wrong, i dont hate anyone,its not a jane and rafael from jtv situation,  and i am interested and invested in their arcs, but i wouldnt say i like   Like them, as in, personality wise 

like, sams grappling with ptsd was rly gutting and i enjoyed that plus her slight rage issues, 

which nicely parallel torys rage issues. torys background is all over the place tho so im pretty on the fence abt her so far

robby deserves better in every way, and i like how smart and cunning and surprisingly sweet he is

hawk............... is there i guess,

 demetri is annoying in the best way possible,

 carmen is sweet but. i just feel like her character is blunted to make the johnny relationship easier. like when shes furious with him after miguels injury but then forgives him like an episode later? and then convinces him to fight for the tournament bc she had a karate epiphany off screen even tho she was always against it? meh. feels like with the plot thiccening she was swallowed and now shes like a crutch for johnny mora than anything, which is disappointing.

aisha was cool and im kinda mad she wasnt in s3, especially bc a storyline with her tory and sam was like RIGHT THERE , but also... cant say i was super super fond of her... doesnt feel like we ever spent enough time on her

moon the bi icon, 

overall its a good cast but the main draw for me remains the og cast 

the tory/sam miguel/robby Thing. enjoy how theyre Narrative Foils and i like how their stories were so dramatically entangled but oh god give me a break with the teenage love square for the love of god. if u gonna put us through that at least have the decency to not make it so straight

and honestly some sam/tory        miguel/robby romantic tension would even make more sense. just saying! 

also im not sure how i feel abt the cobra kai: red miyagi do: blue theyre going with since some of daniels most iconic looks in tkk are also red. like it was a color they (johnny and him) sorta shared. i get it, opposite but complementary but idk... a little too fire nation and water tribe for me .

 and like the cobra kai kids are so funny abt it bc their outifts grow progressively more ridiculously coordinated. its like do they group chat every morning before leaving their houses? 

robby still sticks out like that tho. he went thru an athleisure/daniel san tsleeves phase and now hes back in the bandts grunge, but his color scheme doesnt fully blend with the other cobra kais. hmmmm.

LOVED LOVED LOVED both the okinawa episode and the cobra kais easy rider episode just such good good heart aching fun

bobby is an icon. he was in tkk and he is now ck hope appears more and more

 tommy is like the most iconic background character. all his lines, freaking gold then and now. sigh :( 

the framing in the okinawa trip was so good everything was so good

i stand by the fact that kumiko was the love interest daniel had the most chemistry with and shes is overall such a joy to watch, loved to see her again, idola, fashion icon

also tkk ii is good u guys are just mean

also really enjoyed chozens role in the episode, his evolution; i love that they introduced the pressure points (ty lee the blueprint) and! the honk + karate! cousins! absolutely iconic

when kumiko reads mr miyagis letters........ oh my god, my eyes FILLED with tears, it was so heart wrenching :(( tamlyns delivery was so emotional and lovely and its so obvious everyone involved in ck has so much love and respect for pat morita and mr miyagi as character, and i adore that it exists like this electric current through the show

when we were watching i told my sister i thought that ali would be miguels big shot surgeon and ngl i am so disappointed that didnt happen. hire me cobra kai writers

also the johnny ali daniel amanda chemistry? off the charts

AND the sassy retconning of daniel and alis breakup! LMAO ‘I HOPE U DIDNT TELL MR MIYAGI IT WAS MY FAULT’ HFDJJGNKFKSD

i am preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty sure back injuries dont work like that    but oke

daniel and johnny are so good together whenever, like they never actually help the kids or get shit done and end up fighting anyway but its just so much fun when theyre hanging

JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO FIGHTING TOGETHER

daniels “plan” on how to get robby to juvie was so stupid. literally were u TRYING to make him hate you. dumbass

parents at those hearing rly brave for ppl that did not do ANYTHING as their kids got involved in a karate gang war until now

“bullshit i heard u were the real bully!” i mightve screeched

this s3 ending was SO DRAMATIC omg

everyone is such a MESS go to THERAPY u unhinged motherfckers

also im sorry but uh. a richass neighborhood in california doesnt have some type of neighborhood watch? the larussos rly dont have any security at all? neighbors wont hear the sound of a damn karate brawl happening next door??? also wasnt tory all like ooo i cant go to juvie, my mom yada yada yet shes always running around town getting into fights even at the rich girls house she was kicked out of school for fighting??   ?  ??    ??        ?                ?    ?          ??                  ?    ? girl??

stop destroying the larussos house, its so pretty :((((

sam finding her center looking at mr miyagis picture...  uwu maybe

robby yelling ‘U ARE WEAAK’@  johnny \as he is easily blocking him is like.... so funny and so sad to me. sweetheart. 

also i know it was meant as ‘oh johnny pushes him and HURTS HIM’ but it just looks like robby runs himself into the lockers and IM SO SORRY I FEEL SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 

i like that he and tory are the cobra kai kids now. we need ppl we care abt there to not revert to a good vs evil schtick, and this is the most engaging it could be... tho it hurts that these kids cant catch a break

ah yes "lets bet some real shit on the result of this teen karate tournament bc that is always a great idea" is BACK

so daniel saves johnny from kreese..... maybe johnny will save him from terry 🧐

and dojos unite ohohoho. lets SEE how that’ll work out 

miguels face of Despair when the ck defectors and the md kids are bickering like 'this is never gonna work' : gold

also. Johnny Lawrence is gonna learn some myiagi-do karate AHAAHSJAKDFH

 ive been waiting for this moment all my lifeeee oh lawrd 

final thoughts! there are def things i hope the writers will improve on the next season, but i am very excited for it either way AND i feel like it has made me enjoy the movies even more and that is a win for a reboot/sequel to me!!

[myidlethinkings]

So my girlfriend has been trying to have me read the Wheel of Time series since when she was just my best friend. I picked back up the second book recently but it's been a while since I read the first and she went on this massive "YOU WON'T REMEMBER EVERYTHING FROM THE FIRST BOOK, LET ME TELL YOU"

This led to her Wheel of Time in 5 Minutes ™ lecture/rant and... I had to share this with the world. Enjoy.

Obviously every spoiler for the first book. You've been warned.

_______

k, eye of the world in 5 mins.

begins in the two rivers, emonds field, is gonna be bel tine and everyones all excited. rand lives further afield with his father and theyre bringing in brandy for the inn. rands all omg someones watching me as theyre getting in, tams all i cant see anything, rands all mustv imagined it. they get there. they hear theres going to be a gleeman. meets up with his bestie perrin and LOVER mat I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP who are both like yeah we totes saw the figure too. they go we'll tell the mayor tomorrow.

they see the gleeman thom and theyre all omg a gleeman, omg. then the two strangers, moiraine, who is the best character ever to character in any universe fucking fight me on that and lan, who are asking questions about the area and people and moiraines like oh hi child to nynaeve the wisdom whose like im the fucking wisdom bitch who the fuck are you. she then says to the boys hey here have this coin which is totally a normal coin cuz i might have errands and shit and theyre like holy shit anything you want.

then he sees egwene and hes all like omg the love of my life will you dance with me tomorrow at bel tine and shes all yeah sure in the afternoon cuz i got shit to do in the morning and hes all like wut? and shes all GETTIN MAH HAIR BRAIDED YO and hes all like holy shit that means shes marriagable, holy shit man.

then the peddler paidan fain rocks up and gets everyone in a frenzy over war wherever and false dragons and logain or whoever else.

rand and tam go back to the farm overnight before the festivities begin. shit goes down. trollocs smash in, rands all OMG TROLLOCS ARENT REAL THO LIKE WUT and tams all, fly you fool and rand runs into the woods. but then hes all, i cant fucken leave my father so he creeps back and in the shadows he sees tam creeping around with a sword and rands like DAFUQ why does he have a sword, fighting ensues, tam gets hurt, is dying, rand manages to get him back to emonds field with a figure trailing them.

tams delirious, starts talking about rands dead mother and then starts talking about a battle and how they all poured over the dragonwall and that it was snowing but it was so hot, battle is always hot and she was a warrior even though she was pregnant and she gave birth and died and how he took the baby and rand was all WUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. im gonna ignore that shit.

gets to emonds field. everything is in ruins. trollocs wrecked the shit there too. nynaeve is all like sorry dude, your dads gonna die. hes all fuck that, gets back to the inn where the gleemans like hey that ladys an aes sedai, she could heal him but i totally wouldnt because you never know what they ask for in price and rands all i dont care because HE IS MY FATHER. MY FATHER. HEEEEE. ISSSS. MYYYY. FATHERRRRR. thoms all, holy shit dude calm down hes your father. moiraine, the best character in the universe, heals tam, then shes all like look, you three boys need to come with me and rands all, well shit she makes sense and they go but then egwenes hiding too and shes all bitch im adventuring too and rands all AHHHH and moiraines all huh the wheel weaves what the wheel wills, whatevs, and they go on, with thom whose also like this place is boring asf, im coming on.

they head out, dragkhar fly overhead, moiraine like a mofo destroys them, they get to tarren ferry, cross on the ferry, then coincidentally theres a whirlpool and the ferrys destroyed when theyre on the other side and egwenes like HOLY SHIT YOU DID THAT and moiraines all cuz im fucking awesome and nobody can follow us now so stfu and they head on.

rand interrupts a lesson with moiraine teaching egwene the true source cuz egwenes got it. rands all FUCKING WTF and thoms all dude, leave it, you cant do a thing about it. Shes gone now. Why don’t you bang mat instead. I mean the mat comment never happened but I will ship them till my dying breath. moiraines all to egwene youll die if i dont teach you, there was another back in emonds who also had it but she managed to survive/channel in her own way.

egwene starts to unbraid her hair. rand has a crying fit. egwenes all fuck off man, i do what i want. mydraal and shit attack them, they get to baerlon safely. where the gatekeepers like the children of the light are around but they cant cause much trouble cuz the city watch hate them and the whitecloaks are little bitches. they get to baerlon. mat and rand walk around. they see a few of the whitecloaks, dane bornhold a young man leading the small group. mats like lol, watch this, enters a shop, climbs up the top and hurls a rock at them, loosening barels. rand has started to feel feverish and when the barrels nearly knock them over, rand stands there and doesnt hide and rands like lol and danes like dafuq are you looking at and rands like im looking at you what are YOU looking at and hes feeling really odd and reckless and danes like are you a darkfriend and steps forward but then the city guards turn up who hates the whitecloaks and they face each other off and mat hauls rand off all are you fucking insane, you faced him off and rands recklessness leaves him and he freaks out and they flee.

throughout this time and through the book all three have dreams but i cant be bothered to get into those, theyre basically all the dark one figuring out who is who, and they wake up after rats backs were broken in the dream to be all oh hey it was just dreams though, to find rats dead all over the place and other stuff. Moiraine told them early on to go to her if they have dreams and the boys talk about it and theyre like we should probably tell her but nah, she saes sedai and like, its just dreams yo, yeah a few rats end up dead but cool, its fine, we’re fine.

oh baerlons also where he meets min who can see things around them, like with him a sword that is not a sword and three women on his funeral pyre weeping and with perrin she sees wolves and mat dice and with lan seven broken towers and a baby in a cradle with a sword and blah blah. And she says she can see he loves egwene and egwene loves him too but theyre not for each other, at least not in the way they want to be.

then he returns and nynaeve is there and she is PISSED and is all like we're going home now and moiraine manages to convince her they are in trouble and nynaeves like ..... i dont trust you, but fine. and lans all how did you find us and shes all i tracked you bitches and hes all like, huh.

rand says to her later about MY FATHER HE IS MY FATHERRRR and nynaeves all awkwardly like er yeah totally, i totally dont remember when your father returned after adventuring with an outlander wife, that totally explains your red hair, er yea sure. but that above all they loved him as much as they wouldv loved any baby.

oh a bunch of times during the book people startle at him and him being so tall with red hair and grey eyes and say he resembles an aiel. oh, theyre also ta'veren, so extra special they draw people into doing stuff with their lives, they effect the pattern. moiraine also says the two rivers used to be manetheran, a fabled kingdom. that night shit happens and they run off. they run, fight, attack, fight, as they battle mat starts yelling out things in an old language he doesnt know, that moiraine says was a manetheran war cry and the old blood still sings.

theyre going to get outrun in battle and against moiraines judgement lan takes them to an old crumbling city shadar logoth which fell to the darkness and even trollocs and mydraal dont like entering it.

oh also tam gave rand the sword which is a heron marked blade and lans all like er only blademasters have these why did your father have one and rands all HES MAHHH FATHERRRRRR and lans all yeah but how and rands all he bought it from a merchant years before and lans all yeah that sounds totally legit.

they go into shadar logoth, the boys sneak off, meet mordeth whose all like lol here take the treasure and mats like cool but rands like holy shit he doesnt have a shadow and then mordeth goes all rahhhh and the three manage to escape and they return and ramble about what happened and moiraines like DID HE GIVE YOU ANYTHING and theyre all like no and mats like er totally didnt and moiraines like we have to move and they leave but then this shadow thing that can kill them separates them and theyre all separated and perrin and egwene fall into a river together, and nynaeve finds moiraine and lan and is all like I will cut you aes sedai for what you’ve done to all of us and moiraine is all lol, and rand and mat with thom end up on a ship, the spray, with bayle domon and theyre worried he’ll throw them overboard cuz of the trollocs that chased them but domon seems to think theyre after him.

moiraines like with the coins i can track them, but two of them have lost their coins (paying for passage on domons ship). perrin and egwene roam around a lot, finally meet up with a man elyas who can communicate with wolves. aes sedai once tried to gentle him because of it but it has nothing to do with the one power so it didnt do anything. theres hints he used to be a warder, but now he hangs out in the wilderness. he says perrin has the same thing, perrin freaks out. elyas is like ill take you to the next city cuz you guys are lost. they then meet up with the tuatha'an, the tinkers, who roam around and dont harm anyone even if theyre to be harmed. perrin cant reconcile that, hes all how can you defeat evil by that, but in turn they pity him as hes such a young, sad, violent man with his axe. his eyes start turning gold like elyas' and he starts to communicate with wolves like hopper and a bunch of them though he tries to deny it.

egwene dances with aram, one of the tinkers and perrins all wow what about rand and they eventually leave, though aram is restless for a tinker.

the leader asks elyas if hes found the song which is their formalities, elyas is all no we havent. the leader then tells him of a story he heard, of an aiel who crossed the waste and died, to tell them that leafblighter means to blind the eye of the world. then she died. they leave and then they then meet afoul of the whitecloaks who are fighting whatever and bornhold - danes father – and byar catches them. through the ordeal perrin kills two of the whitecloaks while hes being all half wolf in the battle and they take them in to be questioned.

nynaeve and moiraine/lan end up finding them, releasing them, the wolves assist, nynaeve gets left behind, lans all about to get her, moiraine reminds him of his oaths, nynaeve turns back up.

meanwhile rand/mat are at whitebridge and mats starting to get sick and suspicious. he had a dagger from shadar logoth. a mydraal finds them, thom hurtles his flute and harp at them, says to go, to leave. hes saving them because he once had a nephew who could channel and the red ajah gentled him, while thom was having an affair with the queen morgase of andor when he was a court bard and by the time he got to owen it was too late and hed not survived, which he always regretted and then because he left morgase the way he did she was pissed at him too. rand and mat run for it, rand sobbing that thom is dead.

they go from village to village to village, mat getting sicker and sicker, a young woman who ends up being a darkfriend tries to kill them, they escape. rand keeps thinking he sees padan fain the peddlar from home, whose actually a darkfriend.

moiraine tells nynaeve she has the power too, nynaeve has a mini breakdown. moiraine said it would have begun with a doing something she desperately needed then a few days later collapsing really ill and the illness disappearing quickly. nynaeve once said egwene had gotten sick as a child and shed healed her not knowing how, then gotten sick. moiraine says thats also how she found them to begin with, in the city, she could sense egwene.

rand and mat go to a poor inn, they try to rob them by locking them in the back. mats getting sick and even more paranoid. rand is terrified when he realises theyre going to sell them to a darkfriend and he prowls and prowls till the room theyre in explodes, the wall crumbling. rand doesnt know how but he thinks he did it himself. mat becomes blinded from it and starts sobbing.

they escape. on the run again. as mat is blind, rand takes care of him and mat in his illness is worried that rand will abandon him which rand would never do because mat is the LOVE OF HIS LIFE, rand ends up really sick, paralleling what moiraine said what happened to nynaeve.

they end up hitching a ride to caemlyn where they expect moiraine to find them, if shes still alive. the buggy driver talks about the queen. how elayne is the daughter heir and her brother is the first prince of the sword. its been tradition forever that the daughter heirs go to tar valon to train and the princes go be taught by warders. he mentioned tigraine who was the queen before morgaise, who disappeared mysteriously nearly twenty years ago, who left behind a son galad. morgaise married the husband and became queen and while she had elayne and gawyn, galad lives with them too, now the husband is dead. oh, also logain the false dragon is being presented to the queen as prisoner before the aes sedai take him to tar valon to gentle him.

they get to caemlyn, mats REALLY sick. rand leaves him at an inn, tries to go see the false dragon being brought in. he meets loial an ogier whose nice, whose like 90 but really young for an ogier to have left his stedding without permission. rand ends up thinking he sees paidan, but doesnt have a good feeling, tries to run off, falls into a castle garden. meets elayne the daughter heir who might actually be the most annoying character to exist, her brother gawyn. theyre like omg you look like an aiel. elayne then talks about gareth bryne the guard captain dude she ships hard with her mother. galad MY MOST PURE CHARACTER WHO I LOVE FUCK ELAYNE (not a spoiler, his name is of the most pure camelot round table knight) rocks up, is all, holy you broke into the palace. elayne whose a bitch is like how DARE YOU YOURE NOT MY BROTHERRRR and galads all we are siblings and my duty is to protect you and shes all you wont do anything with this rand ill invoke protection, then galad goes and tells the guards because theres literally a false dragon being brought in and tension is on the rise in caemlyn and hes taken to see morgase.

the red ajah elaida is freaked out by him, knows hes taveren, has a bit of a prophecy but it doesnt really mean much and morgaise is all look, we cant just arrest everyone, let him go.

he then races back to the inn, moiraine and everyones there, they all hug, then hes all like oh yeah mats sick btw. moiraine goes up and mats not just sick hes now tainted. she does the best she can but is all like he needs to get to tar valon to have the bond between him and the dagger properly severed. then moiraine meets loial who randomly talks about an event concerning the eye of the world. perrins all oh yeah thats like the dead aiel girl the tinkers spoke about. that changes the plans once moiraine realises the dark ones trying to get to the eye and shes like we cant get to tar valon yet we gotta leave now. they use the ways which loail knows how to use cuz ogier and male aes sedai made them together centuries before but now the ways are tainted.

theyre like the worlds between the worlds, can get to places quicker but it has the black wind thatll kill you. blah blah blah they use the ways, nearly die, but get to fal dara/shienar, which is sort of where lan is from. nynaeve confesses her love, lans all no i cannot, i cannot offer anything. it ends up that his parents had the throne but his ... there was scheming. His uncles wife wrecked everything, she escaped with her baby into the blight, lans cousin, nobodys seen or heard of them, moiraine suspects isam might be alive but GASP keeps it from lan. the seven towers crumbled, lan has a death wish, he believes hes the only one left so must die.

lord agelmar wishes lan would rise up the banner of the golden crane because everything about the blight is crumbling, lans like no, i have a new oath now with moiraine. lord ingtar is a fight me soldier who fanboys after lan. theres a battle going on in tarwins gap they desperately need help for, but lan says he cant. lord agelmar orders ingtar to accompany them to the blight and leave them cuz moiraines like we cant have anyone else come with us.

Paidan fain by this point has rocked up to shienar and tried to wheedle his way into the good graces of lord agelmar but hes all wtf you look like a creeper and throws him in a cell. Moiraines like I need to question him at some point.

moiraine then takes them into the blight to find the green man who can take them to the eye of the world. the green man rocks up, hes made of vines and flowers, takes them to the eye. two forsaken rock up. moiraine tries to fight, is knocked out, nynaeve and lan get knocked out, the boys run. the green man is destroyed by the forsaken. rand ends up destroying the forsaken, goes into the eye, channels the male source in there, realises he can channel, has a fight with the dark one - whose still bound under the seals, but rand believes he ended the dark one and its done. comes out, the others are recovering. brings out an old banner from the eye thats the dragons banner, broken seals from the dark ones prison, and the horn of valere. moiraine is all, we need to take these to tar valon. rands all, you do that, but im done with aes sedai, im not going to tar valon. im done. the dark ones dead and im going to do my own thing. he turns to egwene who backs away from him when he said he channeled, then she bursts into tears and hugs him and says shes sorry.

they return to shienar, fal dara, where there was a miracle in tarwins gap where they believed they saw the creator and that the light took on flesh - they saw an apparition of a man they didnt know as rand fighting the battle he fought. ingtars flipping his shit because he missed the battle while accompanying them, and then not even being able to accompany them the entire way. After all of his talking about going after a week rand is still there, finishing his sword practice with Lan in Agelmar's private garden and meets up with Egwene. He tells her that he will go away. Egwene asks him to come to Tar Valon with her and Nynaeve, itll totes be fun, I mean theres the red ajah and shit wholl attack him if they know but hey itll be fun, but Rand refuses. He says he'll never channel again. When she asks him if he'll be going home, he tells her that he'll never go home.

Moiraine is underneath Agelmar's private garden. She uses her blue teardrop thing she wears on her forehead to focus her eavesdropping on Rand and Egwene. Using it to eavesdrop was the first use of the One Power she had learned as a young girl in the royal palaces of Cairhieren.

Smiling, she says, "The Prophecies will be fulfilled. The Dragon is Reborn."

the end.

[luque-moreau]

y'know i think its about time ive refurbished my psychonauts headcanons/theories

what??? me??? rewriting my psychonauts headcanons in a more comprehensible and informed way???

ye

alright, i think everyone knows what im talking about, by headcanons i mean headcanon as in singular, and as singular, i mean my "raz is somewhere on the spectrum of adhd".

so lets just get into it:

what is adhd actually?

adhd by definition stands for attention deficit hyperactive/hyperfocus disorder (yes, let me get into the details in just a sec). it is a nerodevelopmental disorder that is almost completely reliant on genetic factors, however conditions during pregnancy can sometimes contribute to certain aspects of how adhd manifests itself.

long story short, people with adhd have a smaller frontal lobe, and therefore less dopamine in general (even though yes, it is more complicated than that).

theres also a little bit of "chicken or the egg first" goin on here, certain behaviors or personality tendencies can also affect how adhd is presented in one individual to the next, however its still not clear if that is because it is an accommodating for a certain thought process or if someones experiences and personality shape their symptoms of adhd entirely. its a very blurry line, and the answer is different for everybody.

hyperactive type

hyperactive type is probably the closest to most stereotypical depictions of adhd, think the 5 year old whos parents brush off their child’s hyperactivity as something that will “go with age”. however, this isn’t only present in children, adults with adhd have to deal with a constant need for stimuli to make up for the lack of dopamine their current activity is providing them. this results in someone fidgeting frequently in repetitive or predictable motions, unable to hold attention to a specific task for long periods of time, or many other of the symptoms associated with adhd.(i sadly cannot provide more information in this area, i am not knowledgeable enough to...)

hyperfocus type

hyperfocus type is a tricky one, it can look like the complete opposite of adhd in theory. hyperfocus can look similar to special interests or hyperfixation, a great deal of time and knowledge dedicated to a very particular thing (although it is important to note that even though hyperfixations and special interests are incredibly similar, special interests is a term more typically used within autistic-circles, and isnt really the best word to use if you happen to be neurotypical). Think of maybe that kid who knows all the cool animal facts and won’t shut up about them. Its because certain trains of thought or activities might release more dopamine then others, so to get more of that dopamine, someone of hyperfocus type will be mentally unable to stop thinking or doing a very specific task or topic. this results in someone seemingly always spacing out, unable to change subjects or changing subjects too fast or with little to no correlation, or being completely unable to have enough motivation to do simple things.

personally i tend to fall under the category of hyperfocus myself rather than hyperactive, however the two are not mutually exclusive, its more common to find people with both types rather than just one. even myself, i might exhibit more tendencies to place me under the label of hyperfocus, but that doesn’t mean i don’t have any symptoms of the hyperactive type. its my personality that affects my mannerisms, which then makes certain aspects of my symptoms more or less apparent. Thats because im an INTP-T, i just tend to be more to myself and constantly in a state of thinking abstractly. I have trouble communicating and even sometimes recognizing my needs, and get to a point where im unable to do the simplest of things without feeling emotionally drained. Thats just my experience though, everybodys different. 

so what the fuck does this have to do with raz then?

well lets think about it, rather than have it just be me projecting myself onto a comfort character:

raz finds issue with connecting to kids his age

lets be honest. none of the campers really like raz that much. or at least some do the bare minimum to be try and be polite. it doesn’t seem like any of the other campers besides dogen, whos also socially outcasted, are really fond of raz. lili might like him, but that can definitely be interpreted as curiosity in someone new and different from the norm. It might not be that the kids despise him, but nobodys opinionated enough to care whether he is around or not.

social isolation is one of the most damning things i had to experience from an early age and still feel even today. there is a sense of feeling that you are different among your peers, whether that is a good thing or bad thing. it feels difficult to interact with other people you are not familiar with, and can really stunt you emotionally and socially. from a really early age, theres somethin in you that knows something is very different between the experiences of your peers compared to your own, and it can feel incredibly isolating.

raz and his borderline stupidity

time to get real again. raz is a fucking idiot. at least in the sense that sometimes his decisions seem incredibly spontaneous and not really thought through. he runs from home to attend a summer camp, not really thinking about the logistics of how he will get there, how the staff will react, how long its gonna take for his parent to find him, and so on. it doesn’t seem like he over or underestimates his abilities, he just goes for it without considering. that doesnt seem like the smartest thing to do, even though we know hes incredibly intelligent when it comes to larger, abstract situations. its the little details that he misses, small minuet things that seem unimportant that he overlooks, which can sometimes make things harder for him in the end.

i think its obvious that impulsivity is one symptom of adhd. however i cannot stress how difficult it is to think at supersonic speed and still feel incredibly stupid. i mean, thinking faster doesn’t inherently mean you will have better ideas, you can always be stupider faster, but being able to realize stupid mistakes or inconsistencies in your own thought process is annoying as hell. it feels like every time you try to recognize the issue, fix it, and move forward, you only end up not paying attention to another issue that gets bigger and more annoying than the first. Its always two steps forward, one step back, constantly making the same mistakes even though you try everything in your power to avoid them or grow as a person. The simplest of facts, ideas, or just things to remember end up being forgotten, and once youre reminded of them you remember them and feel like an idiot. however, arbitrary things and complex issues are much easier to digest and remember for me, things like history and the whole blame game charade of it all, biology and how every minuet thing has a greater impact on others and intertwines with every single factor of its environment, philosophy and theorizing why we think the way we do and what can be changed. but oh shit, im a dumbass i forgot to do my laundry. shit. god fuckin dammit.

empathy over sympathy

one of the basic themes of psychonauts is empathy. simple as that. raz goes around into other peoples brains, and tries to help them as much as he can, even if his efforts are not always successful in the way he intended. he never demonizes anyone to the point of unredeemability, and can empathize and understand other peoples perspectives. hes open to new ideas and

although some studies out there theorize that empathy is impaired due to adhd, from my perspective i feel like that is simply not true. if anything, i would say the sensitivity that comes with adhd (hypersensitivity) only enhances that empathy. i could definitely see social disconnection being one of the reasons it might appear that someone with adhd is less empathetic, however i would doubt that adhd would impair a persons empathy. adhd tends to also entail heightened emotions, this doesn’t necessarily mean a more outwardly emotional person, however it definitely shifts a persons perspective of their own emotions as well as others. the concept of hypersensitivity also completely contradicts the idea of people with adhd be less empathetic.

miscommunication and disconnect

sigh, the dad thing. yup. raz has that very iffy relationship with his dad at the beginning of the game which is eventually resolved. very abruptly, might i add. but thats not what this is about, thats a topic for another day. miscommunication seemed to be the root of the issue, however we only get razs side of the story. not to mention the severity of his claims and willingness to seemingly drop everything afterwards. kinda sus, ngl.

alright this ones a doosey. this, i feel, cements my theory pretty well. like i mentioned before, social disconnect and hypersensitivity are side effects of the symptoms of adhd.  this means people with adhd are highly more likely to either misinterpret someones words or actions if those in question are not completely transparent, its because they tend to overthink and interpenetrate responses with too much thinkin n such. the social disconnect makes a whole lot of it worse, it can just pile on top of already established feelings of inadequacy and isolation. and oversharing as a poor coping mechanism isnt an exclusively adhd related thing, it tends to be shared within similar neruodevelopmental disorders such as autism or even ptsd. i find it incredibly easy to disconnect myself from my own emotions at times and think critically at what i feel and how it affects me. which is a bad thing. if i dont acknowledge my emotions like they are my own for too long, everything falls apart. its not fun. but, that disconnect can make talking about certain more traumatic experiences or instances that had deep personal effects on my life and development as a person much easier to just share. and not always in an appropriate manner, comedic opportunity can be   v  e  r  y   enticing. this also explains why raz might have been able to drop everything about his dad after he apologized. he didn’t really, he probably still suffers just as much afterwards as he did before. but he probably wont realize that for awhile, since logically, the issue has been resolved. long story short, he has not had the time to cope, and to put that off he detaches himself from those feelings. w a c k

of course i have other reasons why i feel like raz could potentially have adhd, or at least be accurately represented in headcanon with adhd, some minor mentions being:

he uses his camp map as a journal to track his in-game progress, list of goals, and notes/snip-its of information. writing down information on some form of notepad or book is a common tool used by kids and even adults with adhd to help them keep track of minuet, individual tasks. its just using a planner, but with a bit more information. 

just from my personal perspective, the lengths raz goes to pursue his dream of being a psychonaut feel more like a special interest/hyper fixation sort of thing. he can jump between having genuine conversations with his fellow campers and just exploring the campground, to investing himself entirely in obtaining his goal, even when it seems almost impossible. thats some serious dedication to one very specific thing, y’know?

this one isnt as solid as the other but: m̶̖̰̯̫̍͝o̵̦͖̟͈̹̤̥̝͐̿̄̀̀̎̓ņ̶̛̭̠̐̊̆̍͝ķ̸̝͈̺̙̰̊e̶͉͚̼̅̔͗̂͐̍̕͝͝y̶̦̖̼͖̪͎̝̖̠̐̑͋̾̔̑́͐͘ ̵̢̲̘͎͉̔̀͒̄͌͊̀͌̀m̴̲̫̮̪̖̍̐͆̕͜͝ͅả̶͙͚͗n̶̗̳̩̙̘̼̦̦͇͝ ̷̡̨̡͔̗͕̘͍̥̑͒̎̐̃g̴͔̔̈̅̐̏́̌̔̈́́o̶̥̱̽̆̂͌̀͗ ̶̝̩͙͕͛́s̴̛͓̥̲̜͓͚̣̠̆̓̌͌p̶̜̹̯̦̫̯̣̎͐̽̉̾ḙ̴͇̬͑̈́̐̈́͘͠ͅȅ̶̡̗̞̩͔̫̪͈͑̓͗d̵̠͇͎̜͔͇͒̈́́̀̅̈́̒͘y̸̡̦̠̻̖̥̿ͅ. yeah, its the most generalizing reason but look, hes moving nonstop the entire game, climbing and running around the entire goddamn place wrecking havoc. a bit of imp can be found in most people with adhd if you look hard enough.

so thanks for reading this far i guess? im oversharing even right now with this, like an i d i o t but yknow what i dont want to read the great gatsby rn, so ive got nothin better to do. who knows, maybe the second game will give us more info to either support/discredit this theory? gotta wait for pn2 i guess

:^)

[kvngjoong]

jisung + nsfw a-z

next is felix!! i forgot about my dissertation so need to work on that, but i’ll try to post it tomorrow, and if not next monday!

A: Aftercare

because han jisung is not only a sub, but a brat, he needs taking care of. he will demand all of your attention on him, so good luck if you wanted to do something else, because jisung is expecting you to take care of him, run him a bath, sit with him, play with his hair (and braid it, hmm?), then help him get to sleep. if you don’t, he will definitely complain about it

B: Body part

although there is a joke he literally loves your chest, he loves your hands more. he likes the way you stroke his skin so softly, he likes how you run your fingers through his hair when he’s in sub space, he especially loves the way that you so perfectly jack him off. for him, he loves his lips the most. he knows the effect he has on you because of them

C: Cum

he cums a lot. like a surprising amount. he enjoys making a show of it and having it all over your sheets, or your hands, so that he can lick it off. also likes having his cum on ur tiddies cause he thinks it looks pretty

D: Dirty Secret

jisung mentioned more than enough times that he wants to video you guys doing something sometime, and he does with your permission this one time. he first off doesn’t admit that he enjoys being a bit of a slut on camera, but it’s pretty easy to see it the next time you watch it and he’s practically got his tongue out and begging for more. second, he doesn't admit how many times he actually got off to that video, and each time you bring it up he’ll get all shy because.. did he just pop a boner?

E: Experience

he knows a damn lot about what he’s doing, but he doesn’t actually have any real experience. probably because he was too busy fantasizing about what could be happening or just he was generally busy. but yeah, he knows what he’s doing and he knows what he wants

F: Favourite Position

literally anything which gives him a chance to touch your tiddies. no joke, he loves it when you ride him, no matter what part of him you’re actually riding. face, cock, thigh… he’s into it (if you’re not wearing a shirt or you’re wearing one of his and it’s kinda see through.. you understand)

G: Goofy

jisung is a brat. do you know what that means? he will make jokes, he will tease you by acting like you’re not affecting him. he generally has a more relaxed approach to nsfw stuff, but he uses it to his advantage too. he’ll get what he wants from you by keeping his happy charm as though he’s completely oblivious to the fact that you're trying to turn him on, or something like that

H: Hair

he’s still pretty young and probably didn’t get the memo to shave anything. but when he gets closer to you he wants to take pride in his appearance and will probably start shaving. not that he has much of it to begin with, he probs doesn’t have much hair altogether anyway

I: Intimacy

he acts like he doesn’t care all that much, but jisung is a sensitive baby and everything means so much to him. especially when he’s laying in your arms afterwards and he looks up to you like you’re his entire world. it’s kinda obvious as well when your sex is a little less kinky and you just wanna show him how much he cares, he will respond the exact same way. but he’s definitely more intimate outside of nsfw stuff

J: Jack Off

He can go all the time, any time. So he jacks off a lot. It may be something that’s hard to control when you first get together because he will be pretty demanding that you help him out each time, but eventually he resorts to just recording it each time so you get to see him jacking off on his own instead

K: Kink

oh hey did someone say the worst power bottom of them all? yeah. he’s a brat, but he knows what he’s doing. he knows what to say to get you riled up, he knows how to move and how to push your buttons. but he likes annoying you because when you get a bit rougher that just takes him to another level. so he’s a masochist too. there’s a whole list of them. he’s a sub. praise kink, teasing, shower sex, practically anywhere sex, he literally is a book of kinks - some of which you might not even know

L: Location

uh.. anywhere. literally. he doesn’t have many boundaries. it doesnt matter that he’s an introvert, all his inhibitions are lost when he’s needy. unless it’s somewhere super public. that isn’t to say he isn’t one to join the mile high club, cause he thinks that would be pretty hot. jisung thinks a lot of things are pretty hot, actually

M: Motivation

he doesn’t need anything other than you. he’ll be talking to you one time and remember when you stuck a butt plug in him and outright say to you what he’s thinking about. he’ll be working on a song and remember when you bit his collar bone a bit harder than usual, then he’ll run out to call you for a little phone conversation whilst he’s in the disabled bathroom (privacy ofc). so his own creeping thoughts

N: NO

he’s not very much into you calling him degrading names. as much as he likes you spanking him, edging him, etc, he gets a bit upset at the sound of you calling him a slut or whore (you get it). he doesn't seem himself that way, because even is he’s practically begging for you to make him cum over and over, he doesn’t do that for anyone else. he does it for you and only you

O: Oral

he gives and he receives. he loves both, no matter what mood he’s in. he loves how you feel when you suck him off and he also loves to show you how much he’s into you and also impress you with his skills. he’ll do it all just to hear you say how good he is. praise kink, anyone?

P: Pace

definitely on the quicker side no matter what he does. no need to ask him to go faster at all

Q: Quickie

a must have with someone like jisung. he’s frequent to a pout and pulling you into a side room because he really wants to show you just how hard he is for you. he doesn’t prefer them, but he definitely likes them

R: Risk

he thrives on the idea of getting caught. jisung is loud, and he most definitely could moan a bit loud so everyone else knows what he’s doing. it doesn’t embarrass him that much, depending on who might actually catch him doing something, but if someone caught him he would definitely get all cocky because hell yeah, you’re dating him

S: Stamina

usually sticks to a maximum of like 2 rounds, but they’re long. he can endure a lot, especially the longer you’ve been together

T: Toy

loves them all, lives for them, will actively look for them to be used on him. doesn’t really use them on you, but is one to sit back and watch you get off with one as he gets himself off, too. mutual masturbation is a good thing for him, providing that you use that toy on him afterwards, too

U: Unfair

as a brat, he is of course unfair. even with you as the dom, no matter what you do, he still has control somewhere because he’s the worst damn tease around. he’ll listen to your rules, he’ll nod as you tell him he can’t cum until you say, and he’ll do it anyway to get punished, but also because he knows it sends you one step closer to hell anyway. so he’s a tease and it’s completely intentional, especially when he says stuff around other people and smiles widely at you because he just kinda hinted at that one time you let him fuck your mouth… okay jisung

V: Volume

jisung is loud. not kind of loud, not a little bit loud, he is the very definition of loud. cover his mouth loud. have to gag him loud (which he likes). you’re gonna find it hard to keep anything a secret from others because jisung literally does not have a filter and if he likes something you’re doing, he’s gonna tell you and everyone within twenty metres. he talks, he whines, he moans, he whimpers… he is loud

W: Wild Card

it’s not often you were his shirts, and jisung has been begging you to just wear one bc he thinks it will be cute. eventually you give into him and you decide to wear one when you get out of the shower one evening, and jisung was really not expecting you to just have his shirt and a thong on, and he practically fell to his knees at the sight. needless to say you were back in the shower twenty minutes later with jisung following close behind

X: X-Ray

he’s a tiny boy, so probably on the smaller side. it would be a bit weird if he was unexpectedly big, but hey, he has other stuff to work with

Y: Yearning

oh, jisung yearns for you a lot. the amount of pictures he sends when he’s meant to be working, the times he’s pulled you into the bathroom and begged you to do something to help him out, it’s easy to see that jisung has an insatiable need that only you can fulfill. have fun!

Z: ZZZ

he has a lot of energy, so he can’t really just sleep afterwards. he’ll not wanna do stuff with you, like go out and explore or something like that, but he’s happy to watch a movie. he loves just being with you, especially when he loses his bratty tones, so honestly after sex he’s so cuddly and cute that you’ll probably stay up for a bit and both fall asleep by accident

[laws-hat-headcanons]

Second commission for @beastofflevance featuring Sakazuki again!! I hope he isnt too ooc - since a lot of these word prompts are s/o relevant I didnt want them all to be like "no he is mean and doesnt like people >8(" so there are a few liberties I guess!! Anyway! Hope you like it!! 💙

Sakazuki - Blood, Snow, Ice, Silver, Heart, Hand, Flower, Gold, Glass, Bone

Blood: How did they react the first time their S/O got badly injured??

. At first he doesn't really know how to react.

. Sakazuki always thought that the thing he cared about most was the Marines and his absolute justice, but as he watches his partner fall to the ground, red already blooming across her chest, he's not so sure.

. But there are still enemies to fight, and Sakazuki will always do his duty – but maybe he dispatches his foes with more speed and ferocity than usual, a little more desperation than before.

. He is by her side as soon as he can be, directing the troops under his command to get the injured to the infirmary. Not specifying her, obviously, but if she happens to be the first one seen then that's his business.

. Sakazuki can't be by her side much during her recovery. He has so many responsibilities to see to but he makes sure he gets frequent updates on her progress from the head medic.

. He visits when he can, but it is infrequent. Partially because of his time constraints and partially because he feels this boiling feeling in his chest when he sees her lying there. He hates to see her in pain.

Snow: One thing they love about their partner?

. Sakazuki appreciates confidence.

. In his partners self, in her looks, in her kindness, in her mind, in her morals or her decisions and actions – it doesn't matter which.

. As long as she can show him conviction in some part of her life he will stand by her always.

. Physically he loves her eyes.

. There is something genuine about the looks she gives him that makes him need to look away or risk that hot feeling that she sometimes elicits from him. Sakazuki is not a man who blushes easily.

. He would never admit it, but he could lose hours staring into those eyes.

 

Ice: One thing they dislike about their partner?

. For someone to catch his interest in the first place they have to be something special, but Sakazuki is very picky.

. He will always find something about his S/O that bothers him, but it will be small.

. If he finds something big about them that he doesn't like he won't be with them for long. He's just not tolerant enough to stay in a relationship with someone who can bother him that badly.

. So for Sakazuki it's something small about her that bothers him.

. Something like biting her nails or kissing her teeth. Humming while he's doing paper work or running her fingers through his hair to distract him.

Silver: Do they keep their promises?

. Sakazuki considers himself a man of his word so he doesn't make promises he can't keep.

. If his partner wants something from him Sakazuki is always realistic with her. If her request clashes with a pre-existing commitment he will be straight up and decline it.

. But he is organized enough to plan ahead. If he knows there is an important date coming up for him and his partner he will keep it free so when she asks if they can do something he can say yes.

. Sakazuki won't say “I'll try.” He either can, or he can't and he doesn't see the point in mincing his words.

. So he doesn't make promises often, but the ones he does make he always keeps.

Heart: When did they first realise they were in love?

. Sakazuki might not be the most emotional person, but he knows his feelings, so it doesn't take long for him to realise that it's deeper than just attraction.

. It's probably a quiet moment between them that does it though.

. He's been working for hours, bent over a desk trying to sort through all the mission reports that have been submitted to him.

. He hasn't eaten or had a drink in hours, but he's too intent to stop now, ready to work through the night – so when she appears he's surprised, thinking she would have gone to bed hours ago.

. She brings a steaming pot of tea and a small plate of food that she puts on his desk, watching him as he stretches from his hunched position.

. And she rubs a hand across his shoulders, gives him a peck on the cheek and leaves him to get back to it. She doesn't ask him to stop and come to bed, she knows him better than that.

. Sakazuki feels content in that moment. He isn't used to having someone look after him like that. And he is surprised to realise how much it meant to him.

Hand: How do they show affection to the people they care about?

. Sakazuki has such a stern personality that it is very hard to pick up when he is being affectionate.

. He's very private so he doesn't really like to show too many feelings in front of other people, he keeps most of his affection for with his partner behind closed doors.

. But there are small things.

. When out with his partner he will place a hand on the small of her back, keeping her close. He will pull out her chair when they sit down for dinner, and makes sure she is served first.

. Sakazuki will always put her before himself. Will try to maintain a presence and ask her about her day. Will always try to spend time with her when he can.

. He doesn't believe in frivolous gifts and he will never buy her trinkets – he hates clutter – but if she shows an interest in something when they are out and about he will remember it for a later date.

Flower: How protective are they over their loved ones?

. Oh, so protective.

. Sakazuki can count on one hand the people he cares about – with digits to spare.

. His preferred method of protecting his special people is to keep them out of harms way in the first place.

. If he can keep his partner from the front lines then he will. He doesn't care if it hurts their feelings, he cares that they don't get injured.

. There aren't many people in the Marines that are dumb enough to threaten Sakazuki's S/O, so he doesn't have much to worry about on that front.

. But if someone outside the Navy were to become a problem Sakazuki wouldn't tolerate it for long.

. And his brand of retaliation will leave the other person drinking through a straw.

Gold: What was their first kiss with their S/O like?

. Sakazuki is the kind of man who knows what he wants and isn't afraid to get it, in relationships and any other aspect of his life.

. So he isn't at all hesitant at the thought of kissing his S/O for the first time.

. Until he is face to face with them, looking into those beautiful eyes and that hot feeling is bubbling inside him again.

. Sakazuki moves in slowly, giving her the opportunity to pull away if she desires, but he feels her hands on his chest as she goes up on her tip toes to meet him.

. The kiss itself is short and sweet, lingering a little at the end.

. He feels a little hot under the collar with the warm feeling of her lips against his, but he doesn't let it show.

Glass: Are they open with their partner? Do they allow themselves to be vulnerable around them?

. Sakazuki doesn't talk about his feelings, even with this partner - unless it directly effects them.

. He is so private and he doesn't like involving other people in his life if he doesn't have to. He doesn't enjoy letting people in and he doesn't enjoy sharing how he's feeling either.

. His partner would have to be something very special or they would have to be together for a long time in order for him to open up about his emotions.

. Unfortunately Sakazuki is not in the habit of being vulnerable in any way, shape or form. It just.. is not something he is willing to do. He will never willingly make himself look less than the controlled and powerful person he has built himself up to be.

. If emotional intimacy is important to his partner they will find Sakazuki somewhat lacking.

Bone: How do their react if their S/O gets hurt because of them?

. Sakazuki is furious. He's furious that he is always so careful and meticulous about keeping his S/O safe, and then he is the one that injures them? Ridiculous.

. He has very good control over his moments, so Sakazuki knows he didn't hurt her badly. But he did hurt her and he hates that.

. That feeling of embarrassment and worry that mingles within him is not a feeling he enjoys, and he is angry at himself. Unfortunately it seems to translate that he is angry at her.

. He will tell her to get up, will brusquely check over her injury and treat her if it's required, all the while glowering.

. Sakazuki will berate her for not being more careful, that she is lucky that the wound was so minor – but really these are things he should be telling himself. He won't stick around for long, feeling foolish and guilty.