#and yes to anyone that saw my earlier posts yes i did take an act on prom day

[idontdrinkgatorade]

spending the entirety of prom watching people gamble

[luza-wayne]

drunk talk.

bokuto koutarou x reader

wc: 1.3k

i like the little hurt i felt, rereading this fufu. i remembered i posted this on one of my old tmblr acc. pls request to me, i'm begging T^T

you were woken up from your afternoon nap when you heard your phone went off continuously. you grumpily reached for it on the nightstand just beside the bed.

as if a spell was cast on you, your expression immediately lit up, when you saw the notification.

bokuto has been more expressive and more clingy this past week. he does things like staring at you while you do work and he'd always bring you sweets and flowers every time he came home.

just yesterday, he brought you another necklace.

though you want to know why he's like that, you don't mind it, in fact, you love it. that's why you make sure to show him how much you love him too.

you looked at the time on your phone and it's already quarter to five.

i guess i should clean up the house. you thought as you fixed your hair and stood up.

...

*ding dong* 

you were woken up from your slumber for the second time today when the sound of the doorbell rang throughout the living room of the house you shared with your boyfriend.

ah bad. i fell asleep while cleaning. 

you drowsily rubbed your eyes as you walked to the door, not minding the unfinished work.

you opened it and there was akaashi looking so done with his life, while your partner hanged on his left shoulder.

“akaashi, did he drink that much?” you said looking at him pitifully.

“yeah,” he stated. “...but he's acting weird today.”

you wanted to ask what he meant, but you told him to get in first to at least place bokuto on the couch and rest his shoulder.

he softly throws his previous captain on the couch as you take off bokuto's shoes. when you came back from putting the footwear on the shoe rack, you offered akaashi water.

“hey, what do you mean earlier?” you asked him, worried that bokuto might be having a problem.

“normally, he would be so energetic and loud, but today he just drank and drank. i immediately noticed it, that's why i didn't drink too much because i'm sure he'll be too drunk later on.” akaashi explained and chugged on the water you gave him.

you looked at bokuto and you noticed how troubled his expression is, even though he's sleeping.

“did he tell you anything?” you queried the editor who’s looking at bokuto.

“sadly, he passed out before i could ask him anything.” he sighed and fixed his glasses.

after you talked a bit to akaashi, he bid farewell to you, since he has work tomorrow. you sent him off while thanking him for looking out for the drunk guy on your couch.

you went to the bathroom after to get a bowl and towel to clean up bokuto. you crouched beside the couch and slowly took his arm.

you successfully wiped it, so went to the other arm. as you reached for it, you suddenly froze when he groaned.

“hm? who you?” he questioned looking at you suspiciously.

here it is again. every time bokuto is drunk, he always fails to recognize anyone. anyone. 

“ah. i was with akaashi. you're akaashi, right?” he wanted to confirm, but you just smiled at him and offered him water, but he refused.

he turned his body to the side, he's facing the backrest of the couch and his arm dangled on the edge of it.

“akaashi…” he called even though akaashi's not there.

you just decided to go along with it, hoping you'd catch something funny that you can tell him tomorrow once he comes to his senses.

“yes?” you answered, putting a low tone to your voice.

“i want to ask you something.” he said, not moving from his current position.

“what is it?”

“i don't know what to do.” 

“about what? tell me.” you listened to him intently.

is he going to talk about what's bothering him?

“actually, i love (y/n)...” you replied with a hum.  “but…” he refutes.

but?

he changed his position again and now he's facing the ceiling with his arms covering his eyes. this is the first time you saw him this serious while drunk.

“i love her, but i don't love her.” he whispered and bit his lips.

“what?” you were unsure whether you heard it right or not.

i must’ve misheard it, but i’m pretty sure i didn’t. what is he talking about?

“what do you mean?” you let go of the towel accidentally making it land on the bowl, splashing water on its surroundings.

“what i mean is that i'm not feeling the same way as before. i love (y/n), but it's not the same love i'm feeling from before.” he said, his lips were quivering and his voice was a bit shaky.

“i'm trying, akaashi. i'm trying to bring back the love. i’m doing the things i did when we were still new to the relationship. i'm hoping the love would come back, but…” a tear fell on the side of his eyes, down to his ears. 

“what if it doesn't come back?” his voice was getting quieter and quieter.

“what if my love for her fades away?” he sobs.

you just stood there looking at him talking. a lot of information came in at once, it seems like your mind can't keep up.

he doesn't feel the same anymore? so the reason he's been extra sweet lately is that he wanted to revive his feelings for me? 

you let out a laugh and comb your hair with your fingers.

“what are you laughing for, akaashi?” he fixed his position, sat on his butt and looked up at you, even though his eyes were still blurry.

“nothing. it's just, (y/n) thought nothing of it when you were extremely sweet and clingy, though she loves it, now she feels like shit knowing what was the reason.” you tried to finish what you were saying, while also trying to keep the tears from falling.

he confusedly looked at you. you cleared your throat and clenched your hand.

“why don't you just tell her the truth? that you've already fallen out of love?” he lowered his head and placed both of his hands on the sides of his head.

“but, i promised her forever.”

he said, vocals almost inaudible, because of how shaky it is. anyone who can see him right now, can tell that what he's showing right now is what he really feels deep inside him.

“i promised that to her, and i still don't want her to be sad.” he clasped both of his hands.

“but you shouldn't lead me on that you're still mine because that hurts much more thinking all your i love you's are genuine, but it isn't. it’s not love, if you’re faking it.” 

you sighed heavily, you felt as if your legs lost all their power, you suddenly wanted to sit down. you did, but on the floor right in front of your boyfriend.

you looked at him while cries and worried about what to do with himself for minutes and minutes.

it seems like he sobered up. 

you smiled weakly and reached for his cheeks. you noticed how he melted into it, now you know that he's really back to his senses.

“babe…?” he muttered and looked at you. 

you saw how his eyes showed terror now that he'd realized that the one he's talking to all the time was you and not akaashi.

“b-babe, i—” he held your hand that was on his face, but you pulled it out of his grip.

you nodded slowly, smiling at him.

“shh. it's okay. we can talk about it tomorrow. you should take a rest for now.” you said and walked towards your guy's room, refusing to let even a drop of tear fall in front of him.

bokuto watched as you took each step. what he's feeling right now doesn't seem right. 

it is as if you're walking away from him for good, but he feels like he should run after you. 

but, shouldn't he feel that way if he had already fallen out of love, right?

thank you so much for reading! reblogs would much appreciated!

also, you can visit my ko-fi acc, if you'd like to tip me and help this broke college student (>//3//<)

[hoe4sports]

“If you remember me, then I don’t care if everyone else forgets.”

Caroline Graham Hansen x reader

A/N: No triggers, just fluff. You are a Norwegian playing assistant coach. Revised 31/05.

You looked at Caroline with tears in your eyes as you nodded. The tall Norwegian woman was standing in front of you on one knee with probably the most flashy and expensive looking ring you had ever seen. “Ja, Caroline!” You said as you were jumping up and down in excitement. Caroline stood up and picked the ring up from the box as she placed it on your finger. “Fits like a glove, Kjære» she said as she kissed your hand romantically. You suddenly recognised the ring as you gasped ruining the bliss of the moment. “This is the ring from the shop?” You said as you looked closely at the ring. “Yes, we can always get it back exchanged if you don’t like it, I can even get you another one. Just tell me and I’ll tak-“ she begun rambling not being the one to fuss about prices or money. You had grown up poor, and you were right now wearing a ring that costed more than your grandparents house. “This was expensive Caroline! You shouldn’t be spending so much of your hard earned money on me!” You stated as you gasped. Caroline hugged her body into yours and embraced you while she kissed your head. “When it comes to you, I don’t look at prizetags, Skatt”

The next morning we got up to work as usual. We had been together for only a year leading up to this engagement, but Caroline had suddenly figured out that she wanted to get married and she wanted kids. If that were to happen while she was still young, then we had to act quick. Caroline wasn’t really keen on marriage when you had met her which was seemingly obvious as she was 30 years old and had yet to have a girlfriend. You still hadn’t told anyone about your relationship at all. She had made a somewhat anonymous post on her instagram earlier, but nobody picked up that it was you on the picture.

The girls were chattering away as you entered the warderobe, silently going to my cubby while putting my cleats on. Caroline slipped in a few minutes later just like we always did. Ingrid and Mapi was chattering about if they were to get a dog or a cat next while Alexia was in one of her moods. You were tying your hair up when someone vocals a shock as everyone turned silent. You turned around to see Alexia pointing to my hand. “Aios mio! That’s a ROCK!!” She screamed while holding up your hand. “Look at the size of this rock!! Where did you get it??” she screamed as she adored it. Caroline was looking somewhat proud in her corner but she didn’t speak. Ingrid then put two pieces together and came to the realisation that it was in fact an engagement ring. “It’s- Are you engaged?” The Norwegian screamed overly excited while jumping up and down. The intensity of the room increased as everyone was waiting for an answer. You nodded and the girls broke out in cheers and applause. “Who is the lucky one?” Ingrid asked as she looked closely at the ring. You hesitated for a second, “alexia” I said jokingly. Alexia turned around and nodded as if she was in on it “si, jealous Ingrid?” Alexia spat out. “That makes sense, it looks like something none of us could afford!” Ingrid states. “I didn’t even knew you had a girlfriend! Congratulations doll!” Ona said as she inspected the ring closely. Alexia laughed “well, If we need someone to help us win, we will just let Benedicte tackle them. That monstrosity of a rock can take an eye out!” The girls all laughed as you laughed with them and you shook head. You taped up your ring and then we ran out for practice.

The practice was rough, and you had to skip to the warderobe as you forgot your waterbottle. When you entered, you saw Caroline getting ready for her physio appointment. “Well look at that pretty girl with that pretty ring” she said as she smiled and reached for my hand. She kissed it and you giggled. “What would your girlfriend say about this huh?” She said as she kissed you quickly as you both smiled into the kiss. You loved her silly side, but she rarely showed it to anyone but you. “MAMMA, MAM-“ you turned around and there she was in all her glory. The daughter of Mapi and Ingrid. She definitely was Mapi’s daughter as she was way too curious for her own good. You and Ingrid grew up together, so you knew the toddler well. “MAMMA, TANTE KISSED CARO” the toddler screamed as you chased her down the field to her parents. “SHHH” Ingrid said as she tried to shut the toddler down. Mapi was standing next to her shocked and oblivious. “No, no Caroline, that’s not cool! She got engaged dude, that’s disgusting!” Mapi said as she spat out her words. Ingrid smacked Mapi in the back of her head leaving her toddler to giggle. “Are you dumb or did someone drop you on your head as a child?” She hissed as the situation now had escalated leaving the girls to stand around us. Caroline was behind you laughing hysterically and you were red as a tomato.

“Caroline, you shouldnt be laughin-“ Mapi started again but got cut off by Ingrid. “Herregud! Use your braincells please” she said as she shook her head. “What? Oh-“ Mapi trailed off as she realised it. “She is engaged to Caroline you absolute baboon” Ingrid said as she shook her head not believing that her partner could be this amount of oblivious. Everyone started cheering, congratulating and you all celebrated on the field together.

Graham95 One of us is gonna have to get a new jersey.

Liked by 284.937 and Y/I/N.

Ingrid_Engen: The cat is finally out of the bag! Congrats 🫶🏼🫶🏼

GuroP: The newest Norwegian powerhouse.

Marialeonn16: I’m oblivious but obsessed

Y/I/N: That will be you xx

Graham95: We’ll see about that.

Y/I/N: imagine moving across the world only to find forever in another Norwegian.

Liked by 963.373 and Graham95.

[anonymous-dentist]

Quite frankly some of y’all are getting too parasocial again, especially with the ‘LGBTQSMP’ stuff. By y’all, I mean the fandom at large, but don’t think I haven’t seen some weird stuff on here too.

Last night on Quackity’s stream, one of the first donos called him a “fruit loop”. And like okay, whatever, that’s bad, but then I managed to find the dono’s twitter literally by accident going through my twitter feed and here’s their reason why they did it:

And that’s really fucking weird! You all see why this is weird, right? And all of the replies to the clip of the dono I found (where I found this person) were all in agreement that this was a funny and totally normal thing to do. But, as I’m sure everyone is aware, this is not, in fact, normal. It’s parasocial as fuck, and it’s weird at best and harassment at worst.

Donation etiquette posts are something that go around the fandom every couple of days, and for good reason. Some people are too goddamn parasocial. You don’t know these people, and they don’t know you. It’s like if you walk up to the cashier at McDonalds and call them a “fruit loop” because you saw her talking to another girl earlier. That’s fucked up. At best, it’s fucking weird to do. At worst, it’s outing/harassment. (Not that I think Quackity is queer or anything, that’s none of my business, and it’s not anyone else’s.)

I’ve seen some weird stuff on Twitter recently. Truthing, really, and that’s something parts of this fandom have struggled with for a really long time. But take this tweet by the same person as above as an example:

There’s a difference between jokes about “haha the qsmp is just a gay dating show and jaiden”, but some people are taking that way too literally. I’ve seen truthing on both the English side and Spanish side of the community recently, and you know that I’m not searching it out for the sake of drama because I don’t speak Spanish. I’ve seen multiple Spanish accounts on Twitter telling people to stop being weird in chat because it’s gotten to the point there that the mods are getting involved (I was watching Roier’s stream last night, and I’m pretty sure I saw this myself in chat.)

Jokes are fine. Fandom jokes are fine. But that’s where the jokes should stay- in the fandom. Yes, Quackity made a joke on day one stumbling over his words and “accidentally” calling everyone his boyfriends. Yes, the Spanish creators are a lot more chill with shipping content than the English ones. That doesn’t mean anything irl. Calling it the first bisexual smp is fine as a fandom joke, but people seem to be considering it truth when, as far as I’m aware, there’s only one actual bisexual on the server, and there’s, I believe, only two LGBTQ+ members. While the default shouldn’t be straight, it isn’t cool to just assume people’s identities, and especially not from what they do in minecraft roleplay. That’s called acting, not real life.

Truthing is dangerous. Anyone older than 16 probably remembers the way Markiplier and Jacksepticeye stopped interacting online entirely, and it’s because truthing and shipping actively damaged their friendship. Dan and Phil struggled with this, too, with them actually being gay but being unable to come out until years after they were popular because of all the truthing going on with them.

It’s dangerous! It’s weird as hell! Not everyone is dnf. Even if their boundaries don’t mention it specifically, it should be common sense not to openly speculate on a cc’s sexuality. It should be even more common sense not to call them a literal slur in their text-to-speech donos because you think it’s “telling the truth”. For a straight person, it’s just uncomfortable. For a queer person not out, it could be dangerous.

As a whole, the fandom has been behaving. We’re just under a week in as of today when I’m writing this, so I guess we’ll have to see what happens next. But please remember to be normal. These people aren’t your friends. You don’t know them. You barely even know their characters right now. So calm down and touch some grass before someone actually gets hurt.

[thatfanfictionchick]

This is intended to be...archival, for myself, mostly. But if you find it interesting you should definitely check out Ikemen Villains!

Ikevil Event - Wrapped in Wicked Romance pt.2

Ellis's Route Premium End

·✦...·✧

The moment he said that, I heard multiple sets of footsteps coming from behind us. 

(What's going on?!)

I immediately heard a gunshot. 

And in that moment, Ellis disappeared. 

Kate: “E-Ellis?!”

I turned around and saw Ellis jumping into a group of men who were holding guns. 

(What…?)

I was shocked at his speed and athleticism, as he had the men on the ground in an instant. 

(What in the world just happened?)

Ellis: “Are you all right? Are you hurt, Kate?”

Kate: “No, I'm fine. What about you?!”

Ellis: “Huh? Me? I'm fine.”

(He's acting like he just got rained on a little bit… how can he be so casual?!)

I was surprised and confused and I couldn't think straight. 

Kate: “Who were those people?”

Ellis: “The ones targeting you, I think.”

Kate: “They were after me?”

He searched around in a man’s pocket and pulled out a photo.

Ellis: “Look.”

It was definitely me in the photo.

The postmaster was very into keeping on top of trends, so he made all of us take a group photo.

(It’s supposed to be displayed at the post office. Did someone steal it? Just to show people what I looked like?)

The fact that I was definitely being targeted hit me, washing a wave of fear through me.

Ellis: “When I heard that you were almost hit by a carriage on the way back to the castle last night…”

Ellis: “I thought they might be the people Will mentioned earlier.”

Ellis: “There’s a rumor going around about a Fairytale Keeper who’s in charge of Crown. Someone’s after you.”

(Except the general public must never find out about Crown. It’s top secret, and anyone who finds out will be killed.)

Kate: “So there are people who know about Crown, and they’re out to get you?”

Ellis: “Yes. Only a small amount of people from the palace know about us, and there are some who don’t think very highly of us.”

Ellis: “There are spies from other countries who are vying to get England caught up in a scandal, probably trying to figure out if the rumors are true.”

Ellis: “Will's been looking into it, and I think he's found out who's behind it.”

Kate: “What do those people want to do with me?”

Ellis: “I don't know. Probably torture you to get you to tell them information about Crown.”

A shiver ran down my spine. 

(I never thought about being targeted due to my connection with Crown…)

Ellis: “Hey, Kate. What do you want me to do with these people?”

Kate: “What?”

Ellis: “Will said if they attacked, he'd leave it up to me to deal with them.”

Ellis: “Lackeys like this don't know anything about Crown. We can let them go as long as they don't see our abilities.”

Ellis: “Do you want me to kill them or let them go? Either way is fine.”

Kate: “What do you mean, either way is fine? Should you really let me decide someone's fate so easily?”

Ellis: “Hm? Yes, it's my job. Plus, I'd rather you be happy.”

His calm demeanor reminded me of when he said “Shall we kill her?” that night. 

He'd spoiled me with his kindness so much today that I almost forgot about it. 

There was a sense of unease around him, like darkness threatening to swallow a pool of sunlight. 

Kate: “What do you want to do, Ellis?”

Ellis: “They tried to hurt you. They're our enemies. I think it would be better to kill them.”

Ellis: “But I don't want to make you sad, either.”

He talked about people's lives and deaths as if he were choosing which jam to put on his bread. 

(Although he could be a bit pushy at times, he's also kind, considerate, and puts people's happiness first.)

(No… He's asking me because he put my happiness first.)

I just didn't know that having someone killed could be a way to make someone happy. 

Kate: “I-I want you to let them go.”

Kate: “There's no reason for you to kill them, so it wouldn't be right to do so.”

(But most of all…)

Kate: “I don't want you to get your hands dirty.”

I didn't want him to have his hands stained with blood for the sake of my happiness. 

Even if he thought he was okay with it, it was a distorted expression of love. It didn't sit right with me. 

Ellis: “You don't have to worry about me, Kate. You're too kind.”

Ellis: “All right. I'll let them go, then.”

Ellis: “And I'll burn this photo.”

He left the men on the ground and started pushing my wheelchair again. 

Once we got back home, he carried me to my room and filled the washtub with hot water for me to change my bandages. 

Ellis: “Stay still. I'll be done soon.”

Kate: “Okay…”

He touched my foot, which was submerged in the hot water, and my body tensed as his fingers skimmed across my sensitive skin. 

Ellis: “Do you not like being touched? Or are you worried about what happened today?”

The depressed tone in his usually sweet voice startled me. 

(He protected me, but I haven't even thanked him yet.)

(Even though we live in two different worlds and have different values…)

(And even if people's lives are something to be taken lightly in his opinion…)

(He really devoted his whole heart to me today.)

That was for certain. 

Kate: “No, I'm fine. Thank you for protecting me earlier.”

Ellis: “I'm glad to hear it.”

He looked relieved as he carefully wiped my wet foot and then wrapped it with clean bandages. 

(It doesn't hurt that much anymore.)

But for some reason, my heart ached as he carefully tended to me as if I were something fragile. 

I couldn't shake the shock I felt earlier…but it was like my heart had been drawn to him today. 

Kate: “I really was happy today. The end was a bit surprising, though.”

Kate: “But I'm glad you were the one I pretended to be a couple with today.”

I gave him my best smile to express my gratitude. 

Ellis: “......”

He knelt at my feet, staring at me, and then spoke in a serious voice. 

Ellis: “How happy were you today?”

Kate: “I…”

(He asked me the same thing earlier.)

Ellis: “Can't we keep pretending to be a couple tomorrow too?”

Ellis: “And that way, I can make you happy tomorrow and the next day and the day after that.”

Kate: “Please don’t joke around like that…”

Ellis: “I’m not joking.”

His eyes were filled with that same strange heat I saw during our picnic.

And I was struck again with that disturbing sense that something felt off.

(If I say yes, I get the sense that I’ll be trapped here, unable to move.)

Ellis: “I’ll make sure you’re the happiest you’ve ever been.”

He stood up then sat down next to me, his gaze trained steadily on me the entire time.

The bed creaked under his weight, making my heart pound even more.

Ellis: “What do you say, Kate?”

The gaping abyss was trying to swallow me.

And somehow, I was too deeply melted into his kindness to struggle and run away.

Fin.

·✦...·✧

[main page]

[one-and-a-half-yikes]

This thought had been in my head before, and I didn't think about making a post about it till I saw a really dumb post I disagreed with.

Once again talking about Izuku having a crush on Ochako, while acting as if Izuku is an average shounen protag like all the others. Except for one thing...

While it can be stated that Izuku did at one point have a crush on Uraraka, and I'm not gonna dispute that, many have already pointed out how Izuku very quickly gets over it the more time he spends at U.A. And all of this is true, but there's one thing I haven't seen anyone point out yet and that's that all of Izuku's moments where we see him crushing on Ochako I treated like a gag.

There's a lot of moments from the earlier parts of the series so I didn't grab them all. But I'm gonna use some to make my case here.

this is literally the first panel where we see this happen, and right off it comes across less like a crush and more like...actually I don't know how to even describe that face...

But the point is that it doesn't really seem like the face of someone who's flustered (especially because we see Izuku get flustered at multiple other points and it looks nothing like this-), and he's barely blushing at all in this. The way that this scene is made, makes it seem like you're meant to treat this in jest. "Oh a teen boy having a crush on a girl, just a boy being a boy!" Yes. A boy being a boy. A teen boy who was previously bullied and ostracized by all his peers and who's only interaction with the opposite sex would have been his mom. I can't imagine why he's having this reaction. Anyways.

Okay now Izuku is flustered...but it's because of personal space? Not the girl in front of you? Huh. Okay. This happens again btw, during the first OVA (I think), where Uraraka in her excitement at being paired up with Izuku ends up in his personal space without consideration for his boundaries.

This continues on sparsely throughout random points in the story, until they just...stop. Completely. And this interesting, because every other time regarding IzuOcha specifically focuses on Uraraka and her feelings about Izuku. And it's never treated as a joke. Whereas with Izuku, you're meant to find it funny, but never highly important, or warranting you're full attention. It's just something that I find interesting, especially when you take into consideration how this parallels KiriMina and KamiJirou, and how for both boys and their feelings toward their respective love interests their feelings are treated again, with weight.

And like I said, Uraraka's emotions are treated seriously. We're given multiple moments to see her contemplate on this stuff. But never Izuku. Why? Because he's not important, it was always gonna be one-sided thing between them, imo I don't think, even if bkdk was never meant to be a thing, that Hori ever intended for this to be a deep, meaningful relationship between these two. That it was always never gonna happen. That's my two cents tho.

Not sure how to end this off, so yeah...if anyone wants to add anything or ask if I didn't explain something well enough lemme know cause I have no idea if I did 😅

[rrxaiky]

"𝐓𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮" - 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐧𝐢𝐚 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬

CW. TW - Character death (Implied: Silver, Malleus, Lilia) , angst (all), breakdowns (Malleus, Silver), breaking up (Sebek) , murder (Lilia), suicide (?, implied: Silver) GN reader- They/them (Malleus, Sebek) + No pronouns used. (Lilia, Silver)

A/N: Possible last post before finals.

M.list

⧉ 𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐮𝐬 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐚

How could one be so attached to another that he was willing to keep a withering body? As Malleus was always, always, no matter how hard he tried... He'd scare anyone near him away... He was unable to make friends... Until he met them. A kind, loving soul that was willing to stay by his side who he had dreamt of not only taking their hand but for them to be by him for eternity.

Yes... He could have both. A selfish, selfish desire. Just with a little magic... Just with a little power... He could preserve their once rotting body for as long as he lived.

Malleus held their hand in his, looking at them with a thin smile he could reveal to only them after their death. Eventually, after staring at their closed eyes, his expression grew to be pained, distressed.

He was supposed to be strong.

Droplets of tears fell from his eyes to their cheeks, and he cried out, "Give me my (name) back..." under his breath, chanting it with broken sobs in between. He didn't know how many times he had uttered those few words, but at last, he had found his voice strained, and he finally knew no matter how much he cried or wailed... He had already lost them.

⧉ 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚 𝐕𝐚𝐧𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐞

Ahaha... This couldn't be true. It can't be. He was just in a nightmare... Right? Right?!

He knew he shouldn't have turned his attention away from you. With the chaos that had arose overtime, he needed to protect everything around him, and he had been doing well... Until he saw you being mercilessly killed by an enemy.

His eyes widened as he tried his best to fend off whoever was trying to fight him, his guard lowered a little after witnessing what had happened. Everything around them had darkened. Was it nearing night? The moon hung high in the sky as screams continued to fill the area, Lilia occasionally snapping his head towards you to see your lifeless body on the ground.

If he only had paid a little more attention to you... You wouldn't have had to suffer like this, he thought. And if only he hadn't thought such.

Just seconds after he turned his head, he felt a piercing pain in his abdomen, and the object piercing him left his body and abandoned him to fall onto the ground. Eyes shaking as he stared at them and as the clouds covered the light of the moon from shining down at the warzone...

He knew he had lost his moon.

⧉ 𝐒𝐞𝐛𝐞𝐤 𝐙𝐢𝐠𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐭

If he didn't focus so much on being a knight... If he wasn't so loud... If he didn't act before thinking, would he still be with them? He could only blame himself for losing them. He was the one who broke their heart first, not them. They tried their best to be supportive, cheering Sebek on whenever they could.

Now, whenever he was training outside of with Silver or Lilia... He'd find everything so much more exhausting. He no longer had someone watching at him with soft eyes, or sometimes reminding him to take breaks.

He hated every second of it, no matter how much he tried to deny it.

He hated himself for letting them go. Why didn't he realize earlier that he loved them so much? As a human, as a friend and as a lover. Sebek was sick of training. He didn't want to train if they weren't with him anymore, and although it hurt him to see them so happy without him, they were now freer than a dove. In fact, a dove so free that could easily fly high up into the azure sky to be left alone by other beings...

Beings like him.

⧉ 𝐒𝐢𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐫

"I don't want to do this." Silver mumbled, the tip of his cold blade just barely pressing against your chest. Why couldn't someone else do it? Why was he the one who was tasked to kill you... Why did the both of you have to suffer? Maybe you deserved it as a traitor... But he was innocent. He didn't deserve to feel what you had in your heart.

You reached your hand out to touch one of his cheeks, and Silver felt his heart break, bit by bit, knowing that that was the last time you'd ever touch him so warmly. You couldn't live. You betrayed all of them...

"Don't be sad... You know you have all the rights in this world to be mad at me." "I lied to you, so just kill me already."

How could one just... Say that? He knew you wanted him to quickly end it all, but he just couldn't, not for the life of him. The strong feeling of guilt, anger and emotions that would take over his body if he did was too much to handle.

Seeing this, you lifted your hand from his cheek, gabbing onto the sharp sides of the blade, blood being drawn from your hands.

"Hey Silver... If you don't want to do it, I can do it myself, you know." Silver opened his eyes as soon as he heard you finish your sentence. His expression only made you tighten your grip on his sword.

"What...?" Silver managed to choke out. "You heard me, and you know what I mean. You don't have to kill me if you don't want to..." You continued on, and he felt everything go silent. He heard it right both times.

"So... You don't need to tell them you didn't kill me."

"Just say the job's been done... Okay?"

Reblogs + follows appreciated! <3

[snarkythewoecrow]

dont really care if anyone agrees but sometimes you just see a take and idk, need to pause and breathe, to stop yourself from stepping in the pile of steaming shit

but i will say this, yes, i do write fanfic for the fun, because i love the characters and media associated with it, and i'm sure a lot of others do the same, because why else do it?

but i SHARE my stories with the fandom and community, with readers, with other humans, because i want to be part of a community, to engage and see the joy my writing brings, to feel like part of something fun and special

and all these hot takes that writers are not entitled to engagement, idk, but it's giving me not so good feelings, which to put simply, in a general statement, they can fuck all the way off

sure, not everyone has the spoons to engage every day, every time, and hey, yeah, sometimes that kudos button can be too much, but if we all tried to remember that this is a community and did our best to interact when we could, that would go a long way

you can reply to existing comments, saying something like "^^^THIS" in reply, allowing you to interact with other readers, because this is your community, too, or you can just leave an emoji, and that's not to say you have to comment because it can be hard, but hitting the kudos if you can is a damn nice token, too

but the point i'm getting at is, the thing i saw that pissed me off and i've seen too much, is that whole bullshit where writers shouldn't act entitled to anything, as if since we are already writing this shit for ourselves, we should just share it and we suck it up if it feels like we're just shouting into the void

but here's the thing, i'm not posting because i want X number of this or that, i just want to see the things enjoyed, to feel part of something, and feel connected to all the other weirdos obsessed with my current thing

and radio silence, topped with seeing post after post of how writers should essentially sit quietly and take what they receive yet continue to share even when they feel alone?

as said earlier, that shit can fuck all the way off

so yeah, my probably less than a hot take, readers aren't entitled to fics as writers aren't entitled to comments or kudos, but without community and engagement, without kindness, the soil might as well be made of salt

[youwouldntbelievehowigothere]

Ao3 is down rn, so I guess I’ll post this on tumblr only. I’ll try to get it up when Ao3 is back up. still got time to come up with a name for it I guess. Currently it’s sitting in my docs as “ONE SIDED ARRANGED MARRIAGE/ZELINK WEEK 2023.″ I retrofitted it to be for Zelink week, so each prompt doesn’t align exactly, but it matched up more than I thought it would.

This is a multichapter oot zelink fic, featuring the child timeline, angst, injury, and more! I might have the rating bump up to M just for the description of injury (and reaction of others to said injury) in this chapter, but there won’t be anything sexually explicit.

@zelinkcommunity

CH 1: YEARNING

Something wasn’t right. 

Zelda awoke in the middle of the night to a crack of thunder. The lightning lit her room in menacing shadows, and it seemed for a moment the terror of her dreams had been brought into the waking world. With a scream that Impa had heard over the howling wind, her nursemaid and guard burst into the room.

“Princess,” Impa exclaimed, “Are you–”

Zelda screamed again, a sob ripping through her. Something was terribly wrong. 

Impa quietly examined her for injury, the soft touches a grounding experience. When she was satisfied Zelda was uninjured, the older woman pulled her into a hug. No one would believe the supposed last Sheikah could be so warm, but her presence brought Zelda a great amount of comfort. 

Enough comfort that she could recall her dream. 

“Impa,” she said quietly, her fear and worry melting into purpose.

“Yes?” Impa made her distance once more. She was almost a mind reader, knowing what Zelda needed at any moment, whether a mother or an ally.

“I had another dream.”

With shaking hands clasped tightly together, and shivers that wouldn’t go away even with the blankets Impa had insisted on wrapping her with, Zelda detailed the ambush that would face someone in a few days time. A splinter group of Gerudo, seeking revenge for the imprisonment of Ganondorf.

“And you are certain about the time?” Impa asked.

She nodded. “There was a full moon. We’re due for one in three days.”

“But you don’t know who will be attacked.”

“It’s someone important to me,” she said, “I remember the feelings that were invoked when I saw this person…” She only cared about three people enough for the horror to make sense. “but I only saw–”

She inhaled sharply, as the blood splattered night came back to her. Lightning flashed through her window.

“Do you recall where?” Impa’s serene face betrayed nothing. Zelda tried to superimpose that terrible wound onto her face, but all the act did was shake her more. 

“There were trees,” she answered unhelpfully. “I can't remember more than that.”

Impa creased her brow in a rare show of emotion. “I will look into this.”

Zelda nodded and dismissed Impa, staring out into the stormy night, knowing no more sleep would welcome her.

…

Her lack of sleep caught up with her when she fell asleep in the middle of magic practice the next day and was wracked by the dream again. 

She could recall the smell of the place now. The damp forest, the chill of night, and a foreign perfume. There was one extra detail in it, the horse she would be riding. It was clear who would be out there, both attackers and victim, and it made her more desperate to do something. 

With a resolution, Zelda knew she had to sneak out, that night preferably, and go to the spot. She’d been mistaken about the time, it wasn’t a full moon, but a waxing one. 

She knew where it was now. She couldn’t put to words or explain, but she knew her feet would take her where she needed to go. It was frustrating to have such an unsure certainty, and in her sleep deprived state, she didn’t think to tell anyone else about it. 

That night she turned in early, citing her earlier nap, and requested not to be disturbed. If Impa thought anything odd was afoot, she said nothing. Zelda told her about the second dream, but held off on telling her more and so she still believed there to be one more day. Impa was sworn to tell her father anything pertinent to the state of the kingdom. 

Perhaps it was foolhardy to sneak out and try to deal with it on her own, but she knew if she said anything her father would want to mobilize the army. Which would turn the rest of the Gerudo against them. The fragile peace brokered with Nabooroo was only held so because of careful treatment. 

Her father and Impa were untrusting of the remaining Gerudo, but they had experienced more conflict with the bandit women than herself. Before Ganondorf had seized power, Hyrule had regularly fought with the Gerudo to protect merchants. It hadn’t been a serious threat to Hyrule’s sovereignty, but a pressure on the border that all would’ve rather been without. Even the Gerudo claimed they would rather trade honestly than resort to banditry. 

Zelda had only ever known about Ganondorf and the malice that seemed to cling to him. She hadn’t thought it a Gerudo trait, rather a him trait. And now years after his execution they had achieved a shaky peace.

Zelda was skilled in magic, and with her goddess harp she could be quite formidable. Enough to prevent  the events of her dream.

As the castle quieted, Zelda slipped into the night, teleporting from hiding spot to hiding spot. She made it to the stables to her pale cream horse without alerting any of the guards. Buttercup started when she teleported the two of them out of the stables, but Zelda had trained with the animal before, and was able to keep control. 

Off they rode into the night, darkness covering land courtesy of the new moon.

The area was near the Lost Woods, a few hours' ride away. Long enough for worry to set into her breast like a bird trapped in her rib cage. 

The night would’ve been pleasant for such a trip had her heart not been pounding like a war drum. Magic itched at the tips of her fingers in anticipation. The healing potions rested heavy in her bag. The knives in their sheaths lay cold against her legs.

Finally, she made it to the area. The Lost Woods insulated sounds, a double edged sword as no one would hear her, but she would not hear anyone else. Buttercup balked though, as horses tended to do at the periphery of the woods. Before she could force the animal past its fear, there was movement from within the woods. 

A chestnut mare burst forth, and Zelda cursed herself for not being faster. There was only one reason Epona would leave her owner. Not even thinking, she jumped off her own horse and made her way to Epona. She held out a hand to the large mare and gently brushed its mane. Epona calmed down and allowed Zelda to mount her. Once situated, Zelda urged quietly, “lead me to him, please.”

Buttercup would likely be fine in the field until Zelda could make it back, and so she dove into the Lost Woods in search of Hyrule’s Hero. 

Or to find his corpse.

…

The cry pierced the night, anguished and horrible, and Zelda knew she was too late.

Still, she had to try– had to do something. Something for the one person who always believed her.

Into the clearing she rode, hair streaming behind her, magic burning at her fingertips. She saw the two assassins, tall Gerudo women, with long ponytails and veil covered faces approaching to finish off Link. One had her scimitar raised, and Zelda threw out an uncontrolled magic burst, pink and shimmering.

The magic hit the woman, sending her sword flying out of her hand. Link lay on the ground, bloody, unmoving. The other turned on Zelda then, her own spear poised to attack. Zelda charged the two of them, Epona more fearless than any other war horse she’d ridden. 

The spear flashed at her, and she teleported off of the animal’s back to behind the disarmed woman, summoning a great concussive force with her harp. The Gerudo had not been expecting such a blow from one so small as Zelda, and she flew to the side of the clearing, knocking her head on a rock. The other assassin’s eyes went wide as she sized up her opponent. 

“Vile Hylian witch,” she spat out, readying a strike with her spear. 

Zelda raised her hand in preparation for a more powerful chord. She had seen Link’s chest move, but couldn’t be too sure. She needed to help him. She needed to–

The spear flashed like lightning and it was only her training from Impa that allowed her to dance out of the way. With a precision that was not her own, she started another song. The song built with each strum and finally she was able to hit the main part. The concussive song was difficult to play without the dodging of the spear, but through the grace of the goddesses she managed.

The clearing filled with her music, and just as the Gerudo thrust in what would’ve skewered Zelda, the magic force erupted. Sending the spear backwards, and the Gerudo flying towards her sistren, for Zelda now saw the third Gerudo who lay still, a red stain under her. 

The second Gerudo had recovered some, and when Zelda started another song she cursed loudly in her language. With some communication, the two remaining Gerudo fled away. 

Zelda would’ve pursued, had Link not been bleeding out on the forest floor.

She rushed to him, not able to stop the gasp that came from her lips when she saw his face. A wicked cut marred his face, leaving one of his eyes a gorey mess. She could tell… no, she would hope she was wrong. 

“Link?” she asked, “Link, can you hear me?”

When he didn’t respond, she frantically patted for the health potions she had brought. Surveying his body for injuries, she determined his wounds were a broken sword arm, twisted ankle, and severe head trauma. She probably shouldn’t have moved his head, but he would have an easier time drinking if propped up. 

He stirred slightly at her touch, and let out a moan of pain. It broke her heart to see him in such clear agony. She prayed under her breath as she waited for the healing potions to work their magic. If he was too far gone, it wouldn’t matter.

Finally, his breathing evened out, and his arm snapped back in place. His face was still a bloody mess, but that was to be expected. A healing potion couldn’t grow back a new body part.

Deeming him well enough to move, she lifted him onto Epona and tried to make her way out of the forest. Only to forget once in the Lost Woods, it was easy to get lost. 

She rode in the direction she thought she’d come from, only to meet trees where there should’ve been open grass. Frustrated, she rode on, foolish in her panic. 

Once thoroughly lost, she gripped closer to the unconscious hero slumped in front of her, despair coming to terms. He was still bleeding, she could tell, and she was lost in the woods, and–

Before she could spiral much further, a voice called out to her. 

“HEY! LISTEN!”

Zelda glanced up in the direction of the voice, to see a fairy. A blue glow surrounded her, and Zelda furrowed her brow. It was the fairy that had accompanied Link when he’d first come to Castletown. He’d left to go find her, so why…?

“I know you can see me!” the fairy said, growing closer. “Link needs help, and the closest ones are the Kokiri.”

“But the Kokiri don’t accept adults,” she argued.

“Ask for Saria, she will help you. Now follow me!”

The fairy zipped off, and Zelda decided to follow her. Through the woods they raced, until finally they came to a small tree. 

Suddenly she found herself in the middle of what looked like a miniature village, where all of the houses were proportioned for children. Zelda searched desperately around. 

The fairy had disappeared, and Zelda wondered if she had been led into a trap. 

“Link, he needs, he needs help!” she cried, “Can… Can Saria help him?”

Timidly, a green haired girl approached from out of the shadows. “Is that…?”

“He was attacked,” Zelda explained, dropping to the ground and getting Link down too. She laid him on the ground and worried over how pale he was under the lights of the fairies. 

“Oh my!” Saria exclaimed, clasping both hands over her mouth. She called to the other Kokiri and started ordering them around. Zelda found herself carrying him to a small bed in one of the houses and being supplied with medical supplies. The Kokiri seemed to be much like actual children and squeamish at the sight of blood. All save Saria, who seemed to have more healing knowledge than Zelda.

Zelda tried to assist, she had medical training, but her hands wouldn’t stop shaking. It was just so wrong to see Link so weak. Fearless Link who never balked from a challenge, who promised to protect her from any dangers pale and limp. 

“His condition seems stable,” Saria said, “but he lost a lot of blood, so we need to keep him warm.” she hesitated, and looked at Zelda. Zelda wasn’t sure about the attention and sat up straighter. “Princess…” Saria started, “could you…” she then shook her head. “Nevermind. I’m going to try and clean him up a bit.”

“Oh, I can help.”

Saria almost said something, but didn’t. “I don’t want to ask this of you, but… I don’t know if the others can help. Or if they should. But Princess, you’re trembling.”

Zelda willed her hands to stop, but one glance down at her blood stained gloves and she nearly threw up. She’d seen injury before, she’d seen blood before, but this–

This was Link’s blood. 

Hands clenched in fists, Zelda set her resolve. How could she be so weak when Link was–

One of the Kokiri came in with a pale of hot water, but quickly scurried out when he saw Link and Zelda. With a slight tremor still in her extremities, Zelda helped Saria remove Link’s outer clothing. He was left in his undershirt and pants, as upon closer inspection, his arm had been healed by the potion. His ankle was still broken, and his head still concussed. Worst of all was his eye, or rather what was left of it. 

Zelda wiped the blood away from his face with delicate dabs. Each swipe revealing the tender wound. She didn’t know what to do with it. Some of it must’ve been removed by the cut, and so the potion had been unable to save it. 

Could he fight with one eye?

Of all the things to strike her, for whatever reason that one sent her over the edge. Pushing away from the bed, Zelda fled out of the building to puke in the bushes. It was mostly bile that burned her throat, and by the end of it she felt like crying. Laying on the dirt ground, she waited for the convulsions in her stomach to stop. Sitting up, she finally noted the Kokiri surrounding her. 

Zelda had never been in such a situation before. She was utterly alone, with no one, not even Impa to help her. Link still hadn’t woken, and the fairy that had guided them there was still nowhere to be found. She didn’t think the Kokiri were enemies, but they also were so much like children, Zelda couldn’t exactly rely on them, save Saria. Even Saria, it felt wrong to leave her all alone.

Quietly, she asked for a drink of water, and it was brought to her without a word. Once the taste of bile was cleaned from her mouth, she pulled her hair back and returned to the room. 

Saria had finished treating his face, marking it clean, with a bandage over his eye. She glanced up as Zelda ducked into the room. 

“Thank you,” Zelda said, “I don’t know what I can do to repay you.”

“You don’t have to do anything… just…” Saria glanced at Link, affection in her eyes. “I’m thankful you were there. Who knows what would’ve happened had you not–” Saria blinked. “Nevermind. I must rest, and I’m sure you should too.”

Zelda shook her head. “Someone has to keep an eye on him, you just worked hard to heal him, I can keep watch.”

Saria hesitated, starting with, “Are you sure it’s alright? You’re both adults and...”

Zelda furrowed her brow. “I am aware.”

At that Saria brightened somewhat, “Oh,” she said, “I see. I suppose that makes more sense. I’ll be close by if you need anything.”

Zelda sat down at Link’s bedside. He was so pale under those bandages. 

Keep an eye on him, she thought, what a cruel joke. 

If only her magic was stronger. If only she had arrived sooner! If only he’d never left her in the first place!

But those were selfish thoughts. Of course he should have his freedom, even if she wondered about freedom and adventure being good things for him anymore. Clearly now he’d have to reevaluate. 

If he woke up.

But he had to wake up! He had to. Saria said–

But Saria was still a Kokiri, and they were different from Hylians. Could Zelda trust the wisdom of an eternal child?

Not knowing what else to do, she knelt at his bedside and clapped his hand in hers. She prayed for healing and strength. And she prayed most importantly, that he would wake up.

~~~~~~~~~~

next chapter->

[heartless-curr]

Hey….Feel free to ignore the icon request we sent in earlier btw ,Up to u atp if u wanna do them

there's a lot to say here so i'm going to put most of what i have to say under a cut. this is me kinda trying to clear the air in a way. to reinstate this isn't a friendship ending message unless you decide to stop talking to us. this is really long i'm so sorry i'm just very hyperverbal and want to make sure there is no room for misinterpretation here!! i'm making this public so that other server members can see my clarification on the situation, because your suibait was public, and because you sent me this in an ask format rather than a dm.

hi az!! it's aki. i'm going to try to take over this situation for the rest of the system, and to try to kind of explain things from our point of view to try and get this all sorted out — because we are willing to get this situation sorted out.

but before i do that, i do have to gently ask that before you respond to this ask, you should step back and take a breather. go on a walk. drink some water. take care of yourselves, you know? discussions like this aren't going to be solved if you're driven solely by emotions. that all being said because intentionally or not, this ask is very guilt trippy. you may not have intended it as such, but the phrasing of this ask, followed by the fact that you sent this in after you essentially suibaited us on your blog, isn't an appropriate reaction. it shuts down the conversation.

yes, we did see the vent on your blog, where you did subtly suicide bait us. if we can agree that richie suicide baiting a 17 year old on the internet is bad, it's also bad when you do it. bad things aren't bad solely when done by people we dislike, or people who we think are bad. regardless of your intentions, we, as a minor, did see the ask where someone who is bodily an adult threatened to kill themselves over *us* being upset, and we felt the consequences of that. i need you to do better. i need you to alologize. but that apology can't have self depreciating statements. just a simple "i'm sorry for guilt tripping and suicide baiting you, i will not do it again. it is wrong of me to do" is good. nothing about how you feel horrible. an apology, an acknowledge of what you did wrong, and a promise not to do it again.

though, i'm not going to act like our now deleted post was fair either. if you saw that, we project a lot of our insecurities and feelings of the friendgroup disliking us (which the current hosts assumed was the reasoning behind why they got the backlash they did). that wasn't fair, and ultimately irrelevant to the situation.

i want to take the time to clarify what makoto said again, because, as makoto himself stated, his intentions weren't to call you or anyone else in the server transmisogynists. we ourselves personally excused the misogyny we had faced by said member of the blog until we realized that this was a person who we have personally disliked for. a long time because of the controvery on their other blog. at which point we stopped excusing the transphobia because we had a reason to dislike the bigot. we hated the transphobe more than we loved the trans woman. makoto recognized that based on how oddly the server reacted considering how often we criticize richie for the exact subject, it might be a similar case for the server. makoto didn't mean, and still doesn't mean, any ill will by it. he has this mindset of "i want to improve myself and become a better person, and no offense to my friends but i'm going to make them improve as well regardless of if they want to or not". plus, makoto is transfemme, so this is a topic he feels strongly about.

he wanted to encourage introspection like what we went though, rather than ask for a behavior change, though i'm not sure how well that point got across. he discussed the situation with pallas beforehand, and pallas agreed that it did seem unintentionally transmisogynistic, and proof read the message makoto sent before he sent it to ensure that it was calm and straightforward. makoto wasn't attempting to attack you or anyone else in the server.

our system truthfully isn't that upset over what we initially brought up. we allowed makoto to send that message because we figured that since i personally have called the friend group out for unintentional bigotry before, people would be understanding. we wanted to encourage self improvement, because we figured that if we just sat on it it would build up resentment, or, down the line, someone would go "uh well why didn't you speak up???????", we've been trying to stick more and more to our moral code, and part of that is pointing out whenever we see something that doesn't feel right in both ourselves and others. if that conversation made you feel uncomfortable, that's good. it means that it was something you needed to hear.

however, we are upset about the response that we got. that amount of defensiveness is not good. if you're getting called out for unintentional bigotry and your response is to defend yourself, you need to work on letting that defensiveness down and listening to what is being said.

to be blunt: we are upset about the strawmanning. makoto wasn't telling you to respond to the transmisogyny. makoto wasn't calling everyone out for ignoring the messages. makoto was calling people out for caring about transmisogyny because they hate the transphobe rather than caring about transmisogyny because they care about trans women and think transmisogyny is bad. we don't like people twisting our argument to be something we explicitly stated that it wasn't. this wasn't a cry for attention. whilst the way makoto went about it was debatable, he was ***very*** clear about the fact that it wasn't the lack of response. because you ***did*** respond. arguing with makoto on a point that he didn't make isn't truthful. it's what i'd call a bad faith argument.

all we honestly needed to hear was a "thank you for pointing this out!". we didn't even need an apology. just an acknowledgement that you care about transmisogyny and will be more careful to make sure that transmisogyny isn't only bad when people you dislike do it. though, i don't think we got this point across well enough — and for that, i'm sorry. i don't like the way you and everyone else in that conversation responded to us, but we should have been more clear as well, and for that i'm sorry.

this isn't a friendship ending message, to be clear. we don't want to stop being your friend. even if the topic that was being argued about was serious, i don't think the actual confrontation itself wasn't bad enough to be a frienship ender as long as proper apologies are given, and more people than just the two of us were involved, however, the suicide baiting and guilt tripping is not good. at all. you need to fix that. we're going to work on ourselves as well, to try to become a better person, and we're going to try to become better at conflicts, so we ask that perhaps both of us going forward try to work on our conflict resolution skills. suicide baiting and guilt tripping isn't the proper response, however, we to some degree guilt tripped as well when we made that initial now deleted tumblr post in regards to the situation.

conflicts are a normal part of relationships, and i think as long as both sides can learn not to be defensive enough and listen, most conflicts can be dealt with.

sorry for just. dropping this absolute essay on you i guess i wanted to make everything about the situation and where we stand very clear ???? we're not expecting any sort of response to this aside from an apology for the suicide baiting and guilt tripping. with the discord convo, all we want you to do is think about it. we don't want an apology. but we need an apology for the guilt tripping and suicide baiting. that's all! have a good day / evening /night ! :))

[pharawee]

I saw someone ask this on one of your posts earlier (it was @angie-the-doll), and I don’t know what part of the novel you’re on, but it’s been eating at me. So, whenever you can answer, can you tell us ifLue wears gloves in the novel? And if he does, does ANYONE point them out??? Like, I need to know for the sole purpose of my sanity…

Hi!

Yes, Lue wears his gloves in the novel, but they don't come up very often (so far). There's this bit when Ken and Lue meet in Korea (in the novel, Phayu wants to investigate the cosmetic surgery angle and he takes everyone Ken with him so he'll feel better after Din's funeral):

“Even when eating seafood you have to wear gloves? Take them off, the fishy smell will stick to the leather. You won't be able to remove it." The young man hesitated for a long time before he slowly took off his gloves. His skin showed criss-crossing lines of scar tissue. Although not disfiguring, it could be seen with the naked eye. All Ken could think about was how serious an accident it must have been, and how severely Lue must have been injured. He watched as Lue's fingers bent to start peeling the crab, prompting him to reach out to stop him. “Let me help. Thank you for bringing me here to eat. Besides, did you forget I'm a chef? I'm really good at this kind of thing." Ken placed a leaf of lettuce in his hand and coated one side in gochujang sauce. He added a little bit of kimchi, followed by the crab meat that he had just peeled, then he rolled it up and extended it towards Lue's mouth. “Try it,” he said, causing Lue to slowly open his mouth to eat what was in the other person's hand. He tried holding back his tears. He wasn't Din anymore. He was Cheng Talu now. He had to be patient and hold himself back at all times. The more Ken acted like this, the more he wanted to tell him about who he was.

But tbh I never really found it weird that no one mentioned Lue's gloves, especially not to his face. He's not exactly close to anyone and the gloves stand out so much that it's immediately clear they're not just a fashion statement. Asking him about it could be considered impolite and insensitive - especially in Thailand where saving face is incredibly important.

Plus, I think they go out of their way in the series to show everyone's reaction to the gloves. Judging from their expressions (and negl I found those kind of rude too lmao), everyone thinks it's weird and out of place. They just choose to leave it uncommented.

[legrandefungus]

Fungus writes more of his EoS AU.

After this, I might wind up posting a bit out of order. But! This is where a few things get set up! This is also where I introduce some music! It's just something I think fits the scene.

It's been a few weeks! Bidoof, expectedly, is trying to be as friendly and helpful as possible.

Yes, weeks. Looks like the timeline's going a bit slower. Thank goodness for that. I'd hate having a month, give or take, to prepare for the dark future.

Shalvy, too. Does having someone who treats him like a normal person is surprising? I guess my brand of baseline respect for all people is effective. It's too bad I have to hide so much from you.

Though... Something's concerning. I bumped into Drowzee and nothing happened. Was it because I already know about i-

"Ah! Sorry, Mr. Chatot!"

He was annoyed. First off, how casually the vulpix acted! But at the same time, the child was running himself ragged. One expedition a day? Sometimes two if they line up? The exploration notice board's been seeing a lot of use from the little one! But... that pace wasn't enthusiasm. Ennil looked horrified at the very concept of a break.

"Ack! Please watch yourself, Ennil! It would reflect badly on us if..."

I didn't hear what he said after that, I was instead thrust into something.

"You... Never trusted me?"

It was cold. Damnably cold. I could see the heartbreak all over him. What happened?

"..."

I couldn't make out the other voice. The blowing wind obscured it from me.

"But I-"

"..."

"!"

Who are you? What's going to change? I should warn Chatot, but he doesn't see me as someone to acknowledge yet. Blast, the future's already going to be screwed up, what's ne-

"ENNIL!"

"Wh-huh!?"

"Are you alright? You fell over."

"Oh, sorry! I did some training with Bidoof earlier today. I must be more tired than I thought!"

"Well, glad to see you're so enthusiastic! But don't overdo yourself, either! You have to know your limits."

If only. If something's going to change, I have to prepare as much as I can. Me reaching the end of my endurance is the baseline of where I need to be.

"Apologies, I need to do as much as I can. Then the other members won't have to worry as much!"

Preparation is key, I need to learn this desperation to survive the future.

That's a lie. He spoke very rigidly, and what kid uses the word 'apologies!?' Still, it looks like how he's acting has lined up roughly with Chatot's first impression.

"Still, you should leave some low-ranked missions for the others. And your partner's been looking exhausted lately, too!"

"A-ah, right. Sorry, Mr. Chatot."

This kid's not sorry at all! He should be taught a lesson before he hurts himself!

"No! For the rest of today and tomorrow, you're to be barred from taking any missions or going on expeditions! You can clean and help around the town in the meantime. Shalvy will be reassigned to do some expeditions with Bidoof."

For a single moment, Chatot saw it. Terror, plain and simple. Not the look of a chastised kid, or one scared of punishment, that's for sure.

"...Yes sir." Well. That puts a bit of a wrench in my plans. How annoying.

What are you running from, Ennil? If anyone, he should at least be able to tell the vice-guildmaster. Everyone's willing to help, if only he opened up.

...

Turns out, doing work for the Kecleon Brothers was pretty easy! And a bit relaxing, too. It was nice getting to let loose and actually use some of my old skills.

They kept an eye on him just a bit to start. Give the kid some simple jobs for the shop, make him happier, maybe a slight discount on their next purchase over 1000 poke too! Then the little bastard went and started doing things that were definitely not childlike.

That's another Gravelyrock. A few quick jots here and there cleared that up.

"What's the tax rate again?"

...

"I think there might be an error in the pricing here. Are you doing a markdown?"

"Oh, that's a sale we're doing! Draws in the thrifty types."

"Makes sense! Gotta have some way to get the stingy folks to make a purchase."

...

"Hey, you think we could hire this one in the future?"

"He's strange, that's for sure."

Strange was an understatement. He was already on par with some of the newer Kecleons in the business, and it still looked like he was holding something back.

Still, the brothers were quite happy to have him working for the day. Most ADULT pokemon would have gotten a headache by noon with all the numbers floating around. The vulpix hardly complained and stayed even to the closing times.

"Say, Ennil. What might be your thoughts on working with us?"

"Oh! I could do some work from ti-"

"Genuine thoughts, please. You're good, but we can smell a performance from a mile away."

"..."

"Blight, am I really that obvious?"

"Pfft-!"

The whiplash going from hopeful, somewhat happy kid to the tone of someone who tripped and lost newly bought reviver seeds proved too much for the younger brother, who burst into laughter.

"Keheh! No, we're just good at sniffing out con artists and folks putting on a show. Too many of them try to get discounts for some reason or another."

"Oh, that makes sense."

"Children also aren't supposed to know about the concept of a tax well. Especially not the one involved with merchants."

"...Right. Forgot about that."

"So, thoughts?"

"I'd have to ask Chatot, but that sounds good."

"Khhheeh... Ahem, sorry, sorry! Please do! It's wonderful to have someone who knows enough to keep up."

"Oh, and before you go..."

They kept an eye on him a bit earlier, too. So, a bit of an investment now might mean a much bigger payoff later!

"WHA-AKC-"

I'm a bit glad my voice brought me into a coughing fit. A lot more talking today than I was used to. Definitely terrified that they knew I was wanting a stronger fire move. But Flamethrower? That might just be what I'll be needing.

...

"I force you to take a break, and you find a way to do more work."

"..."

"I already heard it from them earlier in the day. The two were very enthusiastic about your help. Just-" Chatot sighs. By Arceus, this kid's going to make him retire early. "We'll figure something out. Klefki should almost be done with dinner."

"Alright!"

Strange Journal, page 2.

𝑊𝑒𝑙𝑙, 𝐼'𝑚 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑦 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑢𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑎 𝑗𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑙/𝑑𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑦 𝑡𝑜𝑜. 𝐴 𝑗𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑞𝑢𝑖𝑣𝑎𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑒𝑙𝑑𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑐ℎ 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤𝑙𝑒𝑑𝑔𝑒 𝑖𝑛 𝑖𝑡, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙. 𝐼𝑡𝑠 𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑝𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑙𝑦 𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑦 𝑡𝑜 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑠𝑒 𝑝𝑎𝑤𝑠, 𝑡𝑜𝑜. 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑦'𝑣𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑠𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑡𝑜𝑜𝑙𝑠. 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑦, 𝐼'𝑣𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑡𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑦 𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑖𝑒𝑠, 𝑠𝑜 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑡𝑒 𝑎𝑠𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒.

𝑆𝑜, 𝐼'𝑚 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔. 𝐶𝑢𝑟𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑔𝑜𝑎𝑙𝑠 𝑖𝑠 𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑣𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑔𝑟𝑜𝑤 𝑎𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑠 𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑏𝑙𝑒, 𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝐴𝑝𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑊𝑜𝑜𝑑𝑠 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑎𝑠 𝑎 𝑏𝑒𝑛𝑐ℎ𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑘. 𝐼𝑓 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑠𝑢𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑟𝑝𝑢𝑛𝑐ℎ 𝑆𝑘𝑢𝑙𝑙 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑝𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑒𝑛𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ 𝑓𝑖𝑟𝑒-𝑡𝑦𝑝𝑒 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑒, 𝐼 𝑚𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑏𝑜 𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚! ℎ𝑖𝑔ℎ 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑖𝑒𝑑, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑤𝑖𝑛. 𝐴𝑠 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑠 𝐼 𝑑𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒 ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑙𝑦, 𝑖𝑡 𝑚𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑑. 𝐷𝑒𝑝𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑡 𝑔𝑜𝑒𝑠, 𝐼 𝑚𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑜𝑟𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑒𝑠, 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑍𝐼 𝑜𝑟 𝐷𝑇. 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦, 𝑗𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑙, 𝐼 𝑤𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑜𝑓𝑓-𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑠𝑒𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑎ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒.

𝐼𝑡'𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑓𝑢𝑛 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑜𝑐𝑐𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦, 𝑡𝑜𝑜. 𝑊ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑒 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑘𝑒𝑒𝑝 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑠 ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑑 𝑎𝑠 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛, 100% 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒; 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒'𝑠 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑠 𝐼 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒 170%. 𝐼𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑝𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑖𝑠 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝐼 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑. 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑜𝑐𝑐𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑠 𝑚𝑒 𝑏𝑜𝑛𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑠, 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑝ℎ𝑦𝑠𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ 𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑠. 𝐼 𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑦, 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ. 𝑆𝑜 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑓𝑓.

𝑆ℎ𝑎𝑙𝑣𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐼 𝑠𝑝𝑙𝑖𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡-𝑏𝑢𝑓𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑠 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑆𝑝𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑒𝑞𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦. 𝐼𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑦 𝑒𝑛𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ 𝑡𝑜 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑒 ℎ𝑖𝑚 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑖𝑚 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑎 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑣𝑦-ℎ𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑛, 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝐼 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑝𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘. 𝐶ℎ𝑎𝑡𝑜𝑡 𝑔𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑚𝑒 𝑎𝑛 𝑜𝑑𝑑 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡. 𝐻𝑒 𝑔𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑚𝑒 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑔𝑢𝑖𝑙𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑒, 𝑡𝑜𝑜. 𝑆𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙, 𝐼'𝑚 𝑜𝑛-𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑣𝑖𝑣𝑎𝑙 𝑠𝑜 𝑓𝑎𝑟. 𝐻𝑜𝑝𝑒𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑘𝑠.

[scripted-downfall]

Ok but jpad has no emotional dept to his acting. Im currently studying acting. Like this is my college major. And when I say he has no depth, I mean he plays everything too hard. "The best emotion is suppressed emotion" is in acting 101 and he just does not get that. Jensen plays it bothe ways. Yes he can have clear emotions but a lot of time it's in his eyes or a nuance.

Then you've got Jpad who does the same thing every emotional scene. The same voice pattern for every line. The same eyes. The same... Everything.

And you'd think it'd get better with time.

Oh he's only 21, Jensen is 26, he'll grow as an actor.

Nope.

In fact.

I think he's better in the early seasons.

Come season 15 he still looks and acts like an immature college freshman just now with a beard.

Anyway...

Saw your post and had to share my own thoughts bc everyone I know thinks he's so good and I'm just HOW

Oh, hello!!! And thank you so much for the message; it's really interesting to hear from someone who has experience with acting as a vocation, instead of just from an observer's perspective. (I've done some acting --- in drama clubs and such --- but certainly nothing professional in any sense of the word; I have a sense of what is good/what works and what doesn't from an amateur's perspective, but the technical point of view you provide is awesome!)

I agree a hundredfold with your point about nuance: Padalecki's performance never really seems to have much. I mean, there's the occasional well-done gesture from time to time --- and I'll admit that the representation of Gadreel was sometimes decently good (largely, imo, because Gadreel was acted in a very earnest-bordering-on-deadpan manner... and, even then, I thought Tahmoh Penikett did far better) --- but Padalecki doesn't tend to do much other than cycle through the same basic Signs of Emotion. Indeed, he rarely manages to string them together believably, so it's more of a slideshow of "emotions" than it is an actual, seamless progression through them.

Your emphasis on sameness is precisely something I've tried (and, frankly, probably failed) to tell my friends of similar mentalities; I feel like you've put it into words admirably: he acts the same way whenever a specific emotion is needed. It's formulaic and flat. Anger = twitch jaw + flare nostril + (sometimes) a crinkle between eyebrows. Sadness = drawn-in eyebrows + squint really hard + sniff. "Compassion" = puppy-dog eyes + (what can only be termed his) Compassionate Face. It's like a math problem or something, not a real, human reaction.

I also definitely agree with your point about the earlier seasons: I do think that his earlier stuff was better. I don't know if he lost interest, gave up, or got cocky --- though I tend towards the last one, given his comments that (and this probably isn't a direct quote) "anyone could have played Dean" --- but his prowess, such as it had been, decreased sharply as the seasons went on.

I haven't exactly been subtle about the fact that I am very much a fan of Dean over Sam, so it probably should come as no surprise that I find his acting stellar. But Jensen is just a better actor in general. The nuance, like you said, is very rarely absent from his performances. Same with Misha; he's believable and realistic in a way that Padalecki never really is (imo). And yes, I recognize that some of this is personal preference, but I think there's just an objective difference between the acting of Padalecki and that of the other two.

Anyway, sorry for the long post... I'm sure you probably didn't intend to spark off a whole thing about this, and I doubt I added much, but I wanted to give your note the emphasis it deserved; your take is fascinating --- especially given, as I said, your experiences in the field --- and I also want to say thanks for sending it! I'm honored you reached out (and it'd be awesome to hear from you again, though no pressure) and I hope you're well!

[aisawvhel]

04/02/24

hi diary! as expected, i’ll be seeing you today as well :)

just like i expected, this day will be filled with happiness since today was picture day.

but first, i woke up around 4am and saw the news that my classmate passed away, and it is so devastating for me since he used to make the atmosphere in our room better with his jokes and stuffs. and seeing his friends earlier with those puffy eyes breaks my heart. it is too early for you to leave this world, classmate. but now, magpahinga na ikaw, wala ng pain d‘yan sa taas, classmate.

so, this day was the best! it’s better than i expected yesterday. maaga akong pumasok with nadi kanina tapos i saw him earlier this day hehehe. then when my girls came, that’s when my happy moments started.

i was with them the whooooole day and i ain’t complaining. so, i was wearing a very super light make-up earlier and i didn’t curl my hair bcs i was afraid na maging late, so umalis na ako before 6:30. annnnd, G made my make-up, siya yung halos nag ayos sa akin, and also, with my hair. i also loved the fact that i became more close to F and i swear she’s so nice and pretty! i was just waiting for G to send the pics earlier so i can take a better look at it and post it on my socials >////< then, right after taking photos for our graduation pic, we swaps pictures and i got G, F, S, P, C, A and J. i was a bit sad since i didn’t have any pics of R, E, and B but that’s okay. i got R’s picture on my though :)))) after the swapping of pics, we decided to stay na lang sa room since super init, then there, we played games. we made our pics (f’s cards) as our cards. the first game was, kailangan namin makuha yung own picture namin without peeking sa card na kukunin and the last person who find her/his pic ay pipitikin sa kamay. and yk what, the first thing i picked was R’s picture T_____T i am just hoping that they didn’t notice the way i acted earlier when i saw his picture. then the next game was B’s idea. sabi niya “kung sino ang mapipili mo, malaki yung matutulong niya sa‘yo sa future mo.” something like that, and guess who i picked... IT WAS R AGAIN !!!! i hope okay... i hope >////< i really like him so bad. then the last one before we came back again sa room 201 ay kung sino yung makukuha namin na card ay ide-describe namin then the rest ay huhulaan kung sino. and i love the way they described me as “tahimik” and “mabait” i forgot some pero all of the words they used to describe me made my heart happy. but G’s description of me was a bit realistic, not in the bad way okay, it’s just that, i love that she knows me so well :((( she even told anyone earlier that she won’t leave me again and i swear i almost cried, also F’s description of me earlier “mabait ‘to tapos feeling ko mapapa-ano siya sa‘tin” it’s like she’s saying na mapapalapit ako sa kanila lalo and i wish yes. i love being with them so bad. sadly we didn’t get to play again after the others got their own pictures but that’s alright. andddd last but not the least, i was their camera woman when they took pictures together. i wasn’t sad bcs i wasn’t there. i feel happy just being with them. i love how they made me feel like i belong to them. i might cry. tapos, nag buy kami ng mysip kanina and also water tapos i shared my mysip with S then i also asked P’s for water kasi mas uhaw ako sa water and i was so happy na he did let me drink sa water niya. tapos nung pauwi na, ang clingy sa akin ni F and my heart jumps >////< omg. i was so so so so sooooo happy, bye. then the last one, sabay kami ni S naglakad papauwi, then nag milktea kami both. ang saya-saya niya kausappppp. i wish to talk to her more in the futureee, sadly ngayon ko lang sila naging ganito ka-close kung kailan matatapos na ang s.y :((

i love being with you mostly, not really being with you but, just feeling you around me, i like it. idk why, basta i like you. and you’re a torpe pala. i wish to have more interactions with you in the future, R. :)

i guess ito na yon? i can’t remember anything na other than these e. so i guess this is it na.

thank you for this day, universe. please fill my april with happiness and kindness.

— sincerely,

isobel.

[yandere-daze]

Congrats on 2000!! I'm so happy for you, you def deserve a lot more <33 i just wanted to say thank you for the amazing content ^^ i love everything you write (esp amir my beloved <3) if it's alright with you, what do think abt reader discovering mika(enstars) killed someone for them or maybe even caught him in the act? And what if they actually forgive him? I'm starved for mika content,, thank you so much if you decide to do this!! :D

Awww thank you!! That´s so nice I think I´m going to cry 😭

In that case you will be happy to know that I still got a few Amir asks in my inbox that you can look forward to😏 I can´t say it enough how much I like writing for him because I pretty much have complete creative freedom over him compared to like actual characters that at least have *some* characteristics I´ll have to abide by. I can just go wild when it´s my own oc so I´m really just so grateful that there are people out there that like reading that kind of thing as well🥺💕

OOOh yes, another yandere Mika post!! I just can´t help it, I love him so much and he´s like exactly the type of yandere I love! It´s sad how little content there is out there for him ( or I guess yandere enstars in general). I guess I´ll just have to make it my personal mission to put the content out there. It´s what the people want!!😤😤

I'm actually kind of proud of this one so I hope you enjoy!!

Likes and reblogs are appreciated!

gn reader

tw yandere, obsession, murder, blood, worshipping, reader is enabling very bad behavior, toxic relationship

Reader discovers that Yandere! Mika killed someone for them but forgives him

Okay so I think in one of the yandere tarot posts I mentioned that Mika wouldn´t kill any of his darling´s loved ones because he doesn´t want them to be sad even if he personally would prefer for all these other people to disappear so he doesn´t have to be so jealous all of the time, and I still stand by that

He´s obviously beneath them so how could he ever dare to sadden his precious darling? More than anything, he wants you to be happy, to be happy with him and so he tries to hold back even though it´s hard for him to stand by and watch as your attention shifts from him to your other so-called friends

But don´t get me wrong, that doesn´t mean that Mika wouldn´t kill anyone. I feel like he´s one of the few yanderes that is actually capable of just straight up murdering someone for his darling without so much as blinking an eye. It´s pretty scary how willing he is to get his hands dirty if only he thinks that it might improve his darling´s life

Friends and family might be off-limits but surely the same doesn´t apply to rude random strangers or even worse, straight up bullies? Seeing someone bother you like that and making you uncomfortable is enough to make Mika´s blood boil. How dare they. How could they. It takes all of his willpower to not just jump at them and wildly punch and beat them down without abandon

No, he has to stay calm for the moment, you´re still there with him after all. He can´t let you see him when he´s doing something so barbaric, someone as nice as you would surely be frightened if you saw him all blood-stained like that! You might start to think that Mika is a bad and scary person and he wants anything but that to happen!

He just adores you so so much, that he almost can´t take it and this is his way of repaying you for all of the joy and love you made him feel. Getting rid of the people that put you down is the least he can do for you!

And so Mika is all too willing to follow his victim into an alleyway until they are all alone before confronting them. There isn´t a lot of talking going on actually, he pretty much straight up jumps into action

All that poor person will get as an explanation is a scream of “I´ll make ya pay fer what ya did to my precious darling! No one is allowed to push ´em around like that!”

Right afterwards he charges at the stranger that accidentally bumped into you at the coffee shop you two visited earlier and hits the back of their head with the large shovel he brought with him

He does it over and over until they completely stop twitching and the ground and both of their clothes are covered in blood. Anger consumes Mika as he keeps thinking about the fact that they hadn´t even the decency to apologize after committing such a heinous crime. It almost makes him sad that the punishment went over so quickly but there just wasn´t any time to waste. He was supposed to meet up with you again later so he really couldn´t afford to be late!

So as quick as he can, Mika picks up the body and starts dragging it through the small alleyway. He has to get rid of the body somehow, take a shower and change his clothes so he can be right on time. He doesn´t think he could live with himself if he ended up making you wait for him. No, he can´t let that happen!

He just needs to get rid of this annoying body fast and then he can finally be with you again! Oh how he misses you already even though it´s only been a few hours since you last saw each other! He just can´t help but hum a happy little tune, now in a good mood at the prospect of getting to see you soon, as he drags the mangled corpse across the dirty ground

There should be a field somewhere close by where he can bury the body...

He's about halfway done with digging the hole when suddenly an all too familiar voice calls out for him

"Mika are you there? We were supposed to meet 30 minutes ago and you're usually never late so I went looking around a bit to see if I could find you. Is everything okay?"

In any other situation, Mika would have been overjoyed to hear your voice and even more so when you show concern for his well-being like this because obviously that must mean you care about him! But no, not this time

He was in the process of burying the dead body of the person he had killed himself and you caught him red-handed. The one person he didn't want to know about this

He unconsciously shifts around a bit in an attempt to hide the body behind him from view but he's not doing a very good job at being inconspicuous when there very clearly is a gaping hole in the ground and he's holding a bloody shovel in hand. There's blood on his shirt as well!

You can tell he's very shifty and nervous, he's trembling all over. He's not scared because he fears that he's going to get reported to the police, he's scared that you might grow to fear or resent him now that you knew what violent actions he was capable of

He didn't want that! He wants you to look at him with a smile on your face, not fear! You're such a good and upstanding person, you must be disgusted by him! You would never want to date a murderer, it's all over for him! He can never be close to you again nor dream of ever becoming your boyfriend

What is Mika even supposed to do with himself now that you, his one light in life, are now gone, forever unreachable? What purpose does life still hold for him? Nothing! He's nothing without you!

"Wait is that-holy shit is that a dead body??"

There it is. You saw. Mika can't even look you in the eye, he doesn't want to see the horror on your face, too ashamed of himself that you had to see this

"Wait, I can explain! Ya know, y/n! This pest-this person, they were so rude to ya! ! They ran into ya without apologizing and I was so angry, how dare they??! So I followed them and I hit 'em' cause I was so angry and I wanted to protect ye! I couldn't let them get away with hurting ya! I'm so so sorry ya had to see this whole mess though, a gentle person like ya is way too good for scary stuff like this.. "

Now any normal person would have been terrified and disgusted, shocked at the revelation that someone they had thought of as a close friend turned out to be a murderer. No one would have blamed you if you screamed your lungs out and ran for your life

But for whatever reason, that's not what you did. Maybe it was out of pity for Mika, who was quietly sobbing now as he anticipated that you were going to abandon him now. Maybe you felt responsible, after all it was because of you that this innocent person was killed, and you didn't want to run away from that fact, wanted to face it head on

Or maybe, a quiet voice told you, maybe you actually held some form of adoration for Mika as well. Maybe you were just being selfish, didn't want to let go of him and the future you may have imagined with him

After a prolonged amount of silence, you reach out your arm and Mika closes his eyes, flinching as if he was expecting you to hit him in anger. You were not that kind of person and yet in this kind of situation he couldn't blame you. If it meant that he could at least relieve you of a few of these boiling emotions, than he was more than prepared to take any kind of punishment from you

But the touch of your hand that made contact with his cheek was not harsh, it was slow and hesitant and yet gentle all the same. Mika wondered if it was improper of him to hope that you might have it in your heart to forgive him as you stroked his cheek, not caring that the blood that clung to him now also smeared the back of your hand, as if the dark red served as a sign of the corruption that was forming it's hold on your mind

Unconsciously, Mika leaned into your touch, all too eager to lap up any kind of affection you were willing to give. He almost pouts when you pull away and he hopes his eyes just in time to see with widened eyes that you had picked up the shovel he had dropped in shock when you called out to him earlier

Your grip was shaky but firm all the same and there was a scary glint of determination in your eyes that Mika couldn't help but be drawn to

"We'll have to be quick", is what you finally say after what seemed to be an eternity of silence after his own outburst

"Y/n what do you-"

"People might walk around the corner any moment now. We'll have to be quick with burying the body if we don't want to get caught. Anyone would be able to connect the dots if they saw your dreadful bloody clothes and the dead body laying on the ground. Come on, you don't want to get arrested, do you? "

Then it all went by very quick. You lifted up the shovel and started to continue digging the hole Mika had started, your movements hectic and fast as he stood to the side, still dazed from what had just happened

You.. didn't run away screaming? And now you were helping him with hiding the body? Does this mean that there is still hope? At least he'll take you not wanting him to go to jail as a positive sign

When the thought finally settles that this might not be the end, Mika springs back into motion and takes the shovel out of your hands, declaring that you shouldn't dirty yourself any more than you already have. He'll take care of everything from now on

Whether you know it or not, you've just opened up the floodgates. All this time, Mika has held back because he thought you might hate him but now that he knows that you have it in you to even forgive him for committing murder in your name, he doesn't think that he'll stop anytime soon

He'll try to not make any repeats of tonight because he doesn't want to burden you any more but not that he has your "approval" he wants to keep being useful to you and get rid of all the unworthy pests that make your life miserable

You've shown him that there are still more ways in which he can showcase his love and dedication to you

Yes, maybe that very night the last piece of his sanity broke away. But it's okay as long as he can serve you as your precious and loyal doll

[kavaeroexe]

yandere!luke HC

warnings : typo, bad grammar, out of character (OOC)

attention! please do not try to repost my works, i only post my works on tumblr, if anyone see someone stole my works please inform me through the comments, tag me in the works, or message me!

Since when did they become yandere? do the realize it?

since the accident he might lose you forever

he scared on losing the one he loves and care the most, so one day you just being capture by the empire for trying to stole information, he scared more than he ever experienced in his whole life that time, there is no guarantee that you’re safe, there is no guarantee that you could escape and make your way back to him.

in the end, you’re back to his eyes and embrace, you’re back into his arms, with you cheered up face that you make it to escape and brought an useful information, but no more, he thought, no more you taking mission ever again, at least without him. don’t you know its dangerous? don’t you know that you might just leave him alone? since that day, he promised himself to keep you safe, even though that means he has to manipulate his world, which is you.

he doesn’t realize it, so do his friends and connection

why would he realize he’s being yandere? his friends, end even his sister doesn’t feel he’s doing something wrong, world is a cruel place, and all he do is to protect you, nothing else, just to keep you safe, why don’t you let him be?

you tried to explain to them so many times already, but unfortunately they still don’t get it, i mean, they start to think you’re the one who’s weird.

but you realize he’s being yandere is just the worst case, i believe that there is a small small possibility for you to realize, whether if you like him or not in the first place, the way he’s acting around you will slowly make you melt and of course fall in love with him.

.

.

How do they solve their jealousy problems?

he never changed, just being needy to you

puppy eyes, pouty face, his hands being need and his mad sounds when he’s talking already show him that he’s jealous, nothing else. so when you done talking to other people that he sees that they’re attracted to you, he’s beyond jealous, when you comeback to saw his presence, standing quietly, and doesn’t open his arms like he used to be, that’s it, that’s how he start his “jealousy”

“are you mad?”, “no.. just lost in thought.”

yes i do said him being needy, but being grumpy is his natural reaction, so when the time passed long enough, he’ll just catch you and plant kisses as many as possible, try not to let your sounds out because the louder you are the longer he gets to do it, if its not enough, he’ll just go straight at hug you deeply and put his face on top of your chest and just be there until you say that you don’t have any interest on the guy you’ve been talking to earlier.

.

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What parts of moment(s) and parts of you that they likes the best? the one that they cherish the most?

moments

your first time being the unusual you or your weird reaction because of him

he thinks its cute actually, the moment you sputtering nonsense if he says he loves you at the first time, it went like “i- i love.. you” with his shy face, and that face changed in the matter of seconds, as he saw you stutter “y-yeah thanks blond- erm Tatooine man..i mean- geantleman..no no i mean Luke..”

or you being silent when he kiss you for the first time, absolute dunny and adorable, at first he’s the one who already making an escape scenario like walk grumpily -> kiss -> run, but when he saw you standing still with no reaction, he changed his mind, he start to just laugh at you instead.

your body parts

not to be horny, i think he likes your thighs.. every time he’s on his mind about you, he always find himself sometimes focus on your thighs, like the small thighs that is feels light if he carries you or the thick thighs that bring comfort if he put his head on top of it

ok but the reason he fall in love to you based on your appearance is your smile, when you offers him help for the first time with such smile, he can’t help but want to use a speeder and scream out of nowhere, now by the times passed, he still feels so badump badump if he look directly at your smile, he wants to protect that smile, if he could be selfish, he wants that smile to be just for him, no one else.

.

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What would they do if they finds you doubt them? Or for a nonsense reason, you start to hate them?

sad, guilt tripping (?)

i don’t really sure for guilt tripping, but he’ll be so sad, and to convince you, he’s going to act two times sadder because in that way you’ll forgive her, or maybe he’s just act ignorant so that you’ll know that he’s super sad.

if Leia or Han founds out, and if you haven’t feels bad for making Luke super sad like that, they both will try hard to remind you at Luke’s condition and try to convince you that he does nothing wrong. even though they aren’t reminding you, you already feels bad, then they’ll try to help you find a good way to apologize to Luke, even though Luke doesn’t need a super super amazing apologize, just hug him and say you deeply sorry, he’ll forgive you, the one he loves the most, right?

.

.

if you get hurt, what would they react and do afterwards?

ban you from any mission.

that’s it, this is going to be the last, no more missions, no more fighting, just try to fix a ship- or anything else. just don’t go outside, especially alone. you’ll only be able to use your weapon when you’re running away or you’re on an evacuation, besides that, you will never be permitted to use your weapon.

shh don’t rebel, its all just for you, remember? nothing else matters for him but the ones hw loved the most, you understand? if you’re try to broke his words, surely everyone around you will help you to straighten your rebel in the matter of seconds, got that?

.

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