#and yes i tag for that because even if you're abusing yourself it's the same lies and the same result
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Dating the Hazbin Hotel Residents 😈
Tags: GN!Reader, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned Mature Topics (ie. Suicidal Thoughts, Alcohol Abuse, SA, etc), Spoilers For The Show, etc.
A/N: Ahhh yes, more brainriot for the pile 😌 I was more of a Helluva gal before the show aired, but now I gotta say these blorbos are a dear part of my heart! Hopefully y'all enjoy these as much as I did writing them!
Consider following my main blog @taruchinator for more solid content & feel free to leave a request here for future HCs~
Charlie 🌈
When the Happy Hotel first opened its doors and all of Hell started making a mockery of it, you were probably the only one who took it as a sign to try and improve from the low life that you were. It's not like you had anything else to live for, anyway.
As soon as you enter the building, you're immediately greeted by the bubbly Princess of Hell herself (along with a reluctant Angel Dust) who is more than happy to show you around and welcomes you with open arms.
You've never been shown this much kindness and sympathy for your situation before, so it naturally takes you aback and makes you wonder what the catch is. Turns out there's none and the Princess is probably the only sweet soul to live in this shithole.
As you grow closer, she asks you to drop the title and just call her Charlie. She also shares a bit about her situation and how her mother wanted to save sinners from the extermination each year, and now Charlie felt like it was her duty to continue this legacy until her dreams came true.
You can't help but feel touched over how much she cares, so you silently vow to yourself to help her in any way you can, just like she's done for you.
It doesn't take long before the two of you grow even closer and feelings begin to blossom, but you decide to ignore them since why would a Princess ever like someone like you?
But Charlie proves you wrong yet again, since one day she comes to you a blushing mess and confesses her own feelings, asking if you'd like to go out with her. You can't help but vocalize your shock since she could do so much better than a random sinner. She deserved better, too.
She looks at you with fondness in her eyes. “You've been by my side for so long and supported me every step of the way. Who wouldn't fall for someone like that?”
And thus, you are the luckiest person in Hell because you scored Charlotte Morningstar, and whoever says otherwise can get a knife to their throat.
She's the perfect definition of a sweet and patient girlfriend, never pushing you to do anything you aren't comfortable with (since you really aren't used to such adoration in a romantic relationship), but as soon as you give her the get-go, she'll be sure to shower you with as much affection as she can until the doubts in your mind disappear completely.
You aren't that far behind either. Albeit not as good as her, you do your best to be a comforting partner whenever she needs you. This is especially necessary after an extermination happens, which always leaves Charlie devastated and in need of a hug or words of encouragement because she doubts herself sometimes and wonders if the hotel is even working at all.
You remind her how it brought the two of you together, to which she smiles and agrees that at least something good has come out of it so far.
Vaggie 🎀
Both you and Vaggie used to work in the same legion under Adam with the rest of his exorcists. You knew of each other's existence, but didn't really talk much aside from whatever was needed in the midst of battle.
The day she spares a demon child's life, you're doing your rounds nearby and witness the whole exchange, including Lute coming over and ripping both an eye and Vaggie's wings for showing mercy. You don't know why, but it makes your blood boil.
“HEY! What are you doing?! It was just a kid, why not let it slide?”
And just like that, you become a target of Lute's rage as well, being ripped from your angelic status along with receiving a few nasty cuts, yet surprisingly not as bad as Vaggie herself.
Once the two of you are left to die, you immediately try to tend the girl's wounds with whatever you can. Vaggie can only stare in disbelief at what you'd done and questions why you even did so in the first place—now you were stuck just like she was.
“Guess I just don't like seeing injustice... Who knew Heaven could be so fuckin' shitty?”
You both laugh at the irony of it all, and that's when luck is finally on your side as Charlie finds you in the dirty alley and brings you back to the hotel to heal properly.
For the next three years you two stay at the Hazbin Hotel, helping Charlie in any way you can to try and make her dream a reality since deep down you hope that despite Heaven's corrupt system, there can be a small chance that souls can be redeemed. You hide the fact that you're ex-Anges though, since you don't wanna cause unnecessary drama.
During this time period, the two of you become better friends, having your own inside jokes regarding things you didn't particularly enjoy from your time as Angels, as well as learning more about one another.
You're the one to come to terms with your feelings first and decide to lay them on the table for Vaggie to see—she's always been a straight-to-the-point kind of gal, so if you're about to be rejected, might as well have it be done quick. But of course, she replies with her own declaration and desire to give a relationship a shot, which you're ecstatic about!
It's a bit hard at first since you never got to see much of romantic relationships in Heaven while training for murder every year, but you try and make it work. Both you and Vaggie work endlessly to try and make the other happy, and it only makes you fall for each other even more.
Also Charlie is your go-to wingwoman who will be there to give you the best advice to try and woo your girlfriend. She ships you two so hard.
Angel Dust 🕸
Working at a porn studio under an Overlord who owns your soul can be exhausting. You know this better than anyone since everyone who works under Valentino has contracts that won't let you get far with a leash. This is especially true with your friend Angel Dust.
You know about the things Valentino does to the spider demon—hell, everyone in the studio probably knows, but know better than to say anything about it. You're always there for Angel after particularly rough shoots, doing your best to comfort him in any way you can, though there isn't much you can do given you're in the same spot.
When he tells you he's moving to Princess Charlie's Hazbin Hotel, you're so happy for him! At least that will give him some distance from Valentino and his disgustingly filthy hands when he's not working.
This unsurprisingly doesn't bode well with the Overlord, causing him to throw fits of rage around the studio when Angel leaves for the day. You can't help but make a snarky comment that you definitely regret moments later.
“Can one blame him for wanting space from such an overbearing asshole?”
Without his favorite stress toy around, you end up paying the price for such comments. The kind of pain and suffering he puts you through is completely different from what you're used to. Is this the stuff he does to Angel? He leaves you naked, bruised and bloody in your room, and all you can do is muster what little strenght you have left to head for the Hazbin Hotel.
As soon as the door opens, you immediately tumble forward and start losing consciousness. The last thing you remember is Angel's horrified expression before it all fades to black.
Once you wake up and have been patched up, you explain what happened at the studio, and you could've sworn you saw fire in Angel's eyes as he holds on to you, fearing you might disappear at any moment. He begs you to stay in the hotel with him, and you agree without hesitation.
And so, your new routine of heading to work and then coming back to the hotel becomes blissful, not having to deal with that lunatic mothman more than necessary. You also get to spend time off with your best friend, which is always a plus.
Well, ‘best friend’ might not be the best way to describe it. You'd developed a crush on the spider demon even before this whole incident occurred, and now that you were spending more time with him, it only continued to grow.
With the line of work you two had, romantic relationships didn't seem to be a thing that crossed anybody's mind since why have a permanent partner when you could just go around fucking the hottest people in Hell? But you knew your feelings were far beyond from sexual, but didn't wanna ruin what you already had going for you.
One heartfelt drunken conversation after work however, makes you do a double take—Angel likes you back. And that both scares and excites you. But with both of you going over the pros and cons with each other, you decide to give it a chance.
You make sure to always have Angel's consent when it comes to physical intimacy—anything from holding his hand, to kissing to just cuddling. He jokes about not being a porcelain doll, but deep down you know he appreciates it.
You're also there for the rough nights, when he comes home wanting nothing more than to die again and let the earth swallow him whole. Words of reassurance are spoken and you can only hold him and let him cry as you vow to do anything in your power to stop this from happening again.
Husker 🍺
As one of the first guests of the hotel, like any wayward sinner, you find yourself in the bar more often than you'd like. Alcohol killed you in the first place, yet not even in the afterlife could you seem to pull yourself from its grasp.
It's a somewhat welcome surprise to find out that the bartender is going through a similar struggle. He still serves you drinks and lends and ear whenever he's not busy, but will occasionally drop the words of wisdom to watch your fill.
Eventually you two find yourselves doing this little back and forth and aid each other when you're in your dark places—Husk won't let you near the bottle if he sees you're about to knock yourself out, meanwhile you're there to look after him when he has one too many drinks and can't take care of himself.
Not to say he isn't a good drinking buddy—you've found out most of the gossip around the hotel thanks to this sneaky little cat demon and there's never a dull moment with him around.
You learn about his deal with Alastor during a particularly bad night, when Husk's had one too many and isn't thinking straight. You don't bring it up, but now have an eye open for whenever the Radio Demon drags your friend away.
Angel's the one who brings up your questionable relationship to the surface.
“So... you two like, fuckin' each other, or what?”
Your entire face goes red, and if it weren't for the dark fur you could swear you see Husk looking the same. He's quick to get rid of Angel's nosy ass, but now the seed has been planted in your brain—do you like Husk that way?
After careful consideration, you come to the conclusion that yes, you do. And it's honestly kinda terrifying considering how relationships don't usually work out in Hell, at least from what you've seen. Besides, even if you did try and confess, there was always the possibility of him not feeling the same and just being embarrassed by Angel's comment.
So in an attempt to make your feelings disappear, you stop frequenting the bar. Who knew the best way to stop drinking habits was trying to avoid spending time with your unrequited crush?
But of course, Husk isn't stupid. He sees the change in your behavior and let's it slide for a while, until he eventually corners you and asks what's wrong. You decide to get it all out of the way and tell him how you feel.
To the embarrassment of both of you, he holds your hand firmly between his and darts his eyes toward the corner of the room. “Next time you should ask before going off assuming things, ya got it?”
And so, your glass may have been empty that day, but your heart had never felt fuller.
Sir Pentious 🐍
You meet Sir Pentious when you sign into the hotel, and your immediate thought is just how can this snake man be so adorkable, it should be illegal.
As you greet the other residents and staff, you're quick to strike a conversation with him, which based on his body language he was not expecting. He starts telling you a bit about his weaponry and other contraptions, and you can't help but be fascinated by it.
You're a bit of a tinkerer yourself, albeit you've only dabbled in small scale projects—nothing compared to the massive canons and aircrafts that Pentious seems to be familiar with.
He acts like a kid opening gifts on Sinmas when he talks to you about his inventions, clearly never having anyone show interest before. Eventually he'll even ask for your input on certain smaller projects he wants to work on to help around the hotel, all to thank Charlie for being so kind to him and giving him a second chance. You're obviously eager to help!
You two start spending so much time together that the egg boys have started calling you ‘Boss #2’, much to Pentious' embarrassment and your amusement.
One afternoon once exercises are done for the day, the snake demon seems much more fidgety than usual as he invites you over to his room to continue working on his security system prototype. He's a blabbering mess once he has you sitting down and your heart just can't help but swell at each little syllable.
“Dearest (y/n)... you've, um, well... you are a huge inspiration for my work! A-And I wouldn't have been able to create any of this... without your help. You are kind, and smart and very talented.... and w-well, um I-”
You gotta silence the man with a kiss otherwise you two would be here all day. He's puddy in your hands and you can only giggle in return. “I really like you too, Pen.”
Everyone is either saying they called it or groaning in annoyance because fucking FINALLY, you two were just dancing around each other like idiots. The egg boys are just so happy to have someone else besides Pentious to be in their lives, and will do their best to look out for you just like with their own boss.
So yeah, prepare yourself for some sickeningly sweet gestures from this guy cause he will go above and beyond to get you what you need/want even if it kills him (again). And you can confidently say that you'd do the same in return.
Alastor 📻
After running in the same circles when you were alive, it's no surprise to you to end up in Hell, although you never would've suspected that you'd find yourself in the same place as him. It was honestly a huge relief not having to go through this all by yourself.
As Alastor exerted his dominance over Hell as the Radio Demon, you were powerful enough to be an Overlord yes, but rather liked keeping it on the down low instead of making a spectacle of yourself (Alastor was the one for theatrics anyway). Because of this, only select few knew of your true power and what you were capable of.
Instead, if there was one thing you were known for, it was being the only soul allowed to be close to the Radio Demon without the risk of death.
Yes, Alastor was a sadistic, cold-blooded and egotistical mastermind, but he wasn't a monster. You knew that better than anyone. Although the reactions he had to other demons treating you like a joke or calling you the ‘Radio Demon's Pet’ were not helping his case.
“ł₣ ɎØɄ V₳ⱠɄɆ ɎØɄⱤ ₴ØɄⱠ, ɎØɄ ₩łⱠⱠ ₩₳Ⱡ₭ ₳₩₳Ɏ Ɽł₲Ⱨ₮ ₦Ø₩ ฿Ɇ₣ØⱤɆ ł Ɽł₱ ł₮ ₳₱₳Ɽ₮ ฿ł₮ ฿Ɏ ฿ł₮...”
“Al, chill. You're gonna make them shit their pants.”
After his seven year absence, you immediately noticed something was wrong with him, and wouldn't stop pestering until he told you the truth—A deal he made and how his soul was now bound to someone much more powerful than he was.
You were obviously mortified and started looking into ways to try and find a loophole to this, but alas the Radio Demon would just give you his signature grin and tell you not to worry about it. It was his battle to face.
But of course you're quick to remind him that you've stuck together through thick and thin even in life, so there was no way you were letting him handle this by himself. You work as a team—always have and always will. You engulf him in a hug.
“We're gonna figure this out, Al. I promise...”
The grin remains, but his eyes widen slightly in surprise. He hesitantly returns the embrace, patting your back and wiping the tears you didn't even know you were shedding.
“There there~ To think such a sweet and innocent soul wound up in a gutter like this. I cannot say I complain as long as I have your delightful company beside me.”
And so when he says he has a plan that involves Princess Charlie Morningstar and her new Happy Hotel, you follow along. Whatever fate has in store for you two, you'll be ready.
Also Charlie is a sweetheart who could do no harm. Knowing Alastor, he'll probably do whatever he can here and there to help around for the cause. You also offer your services as an undercover Overlord, much to everyone's surprise when you reveal your status.
The Radio Demon may have a plan, but something tells you it won't involve bloody murder (unless extremely necessary or if someone really pissed him off).
Like you said—he's not a monster.
Lucifer 🍎
You and Lucifer were good friends at the beginning of Creation. While you were stuck with the tedious task of designing blueprints for the new ‘Human Project’ that headquarters had in store, Lucifer's Seraphim status allowed him to bring creations to life with the flick of a wrist, much to your delight and wonder.
His ideas and pitches for Earth were always so entertaining to listen to, and you would do your best to encourage him to show them to the higher ups to get them approved—His mind was just filled with joy and love and wonder that you'd never seen before.
Which was why it was always so disappointing whenever he'd come back and say that he was shut down and even mocked at. How could Heaven shut down such an imaginative mind in the creation of their biggest project yet?
To say you were devastated when you heard about his fall would be an understatement. You mourned the loss of your friend, knowing that he'd done nothing wrong and thinking it wasn't fair to him to receive such punishment just because he cared for the future of humanity.
Thousands of years later, you overhear the plan for Extermination of Hell kind. You didn't mean to walk by, yet here you were, under the direct eye of the Head Seraphims about to be downcast for something you had no control over—just like Lucifer.
“You're all self-entitled pricks! You think you can do whatever you want just because it doesn't follow what you define as good!”
You get a few good arguments before being cast downwards, leaving you in bad shape in a random alley with no wings and no means of escape. That is of course, until destiny seems to be on your side and Lucifer finds you, completely perplexed to see you here at all.
After getting treated, you tell him about the Extermination so he and Hell can prepare. The conversation of you getting cast down by Heaven gets glossed over, but he can feel the fury building up inside him. You were always doing things by the book—how could they do this to you?
Once the slaughter is over, Lucifer gets a meeting with Heaven and secures protection for both his daughter Charlie and you, to which they begrudgingly agree to keep him outta their hair. You can't help but feel touched by this gesture.
He's also quick to offer you a room to stay in, but you compromise by living in a seperate building from him and Charlie so you aren't a bother even though he says you aren't. In fact, ever since Lilith left, he's had to take care of his young daughter all by himself, so he's more than happy when you offer to help.
It doesn't take long for your feelings to start coming into the surface from all those years ago, and you gotta push them away because he's both married and has a child to look after! Besides, why would the King of Hell ever look in your direction?
Eventually though, he brings up the question with nothing but sweaty palms and a customized rubber ducky that says ‘I love you’ whenever you squeeze it. You blush furiously, but can't help but bring up your concerns, not wanting to replace Lilith in his heart. He looks into your eyes and says that he hasn't been as happy as he is now in the past thousand years.
Cue baby Charlie walking in on everything, and she just smiles and goes innocently. “Daddy! Is (y/n) staying home with us now?”
You two can only chuckle at the cuteness of it and you immediately go to hug her. You couldn't believe that you were blessed with such a wonderful family.
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel spoilers#hazbin hotel x reader#charlie morningstar x reader#vaggie x reader#angel dust x reader#alastor x reader#sir pentious x reader#lucifer morningstar x reader#husker x reader#husk x reader
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Tormented Spirit | 2
Part 1 2 3
"Is it such a sin to stand up for yourself?" you mutter as tears blur your vision. The way he reacted was visceral, instinctive even. "You never have to stand up for yourself ever again," says Daemon, reaching a hand to you, "come."
Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!Reader | 4k+ | cw: fem!reader, reader has brown hair, wife!reader, twin!Gwayne, arranged/forced marriage, canon divergence, alternate universe, smut (piv, loss of virginity, fingering, semi-public sex, Daemon talking you through it), DD:DNE, panic/anxiety attacks, daddy issues/child abuse/family problems, mentions/depictions of mental/physical/psychosomatic illness, mentions/depictions of death/suicidal ideation/murder, ye old misogyny, angst, typos, etc.
A/N: i am surprised I got as many comments as I did on chapter 1 🥺🫶 it's not that I think my writing is bad... Well... Idk it felt aimless when I started so I am grateful for the positive reinforcement. 👉👈 I am once again asking for more pls comment n reblog I would love u forever if u did | cross posted on ao3
Tagging: @arabellasleopardcoat
Daemon heads to your chambers, eager to shake you awake and ruin your morning once more. When he arrives to the room, he stops in his tracks, disappointed to see you were risen. That is, until he realizes the state you were in.
You roused long before the sun had and could not find sleep no matter how badly you searched. You decided to draw yourself a warm bath in hopes of finding sleep in the tub; you only find more restlessness and simply accept your fate.
You hear Daemon's entrance and turn to him from the vanity you were wallowing. You were half dressed. Your corset was undone and you had given up on braiding the sides of your head. You smile weakly at him, "good morrow."
Nothing about your tired, sullen eyes agreed with that, and it irritates him to know that you're one of those people. Pretenders.
"Well, finish up then," Daemon furrows his brows, "get dressed. We have yet to accomplish our task."
You mimic his expression, brushing your dark hair back, "task?"
He rolls his eyes, "I do not believe yesterday counts as an introduction."
Upon realizing he meant the introduction to Caraxes, your body tenses. You look sick. You stand to try and convince him out of it, but Daemon reaches you before you can get on your feet. He places a hand on your shoulder, keeping you in place. Your heart thunders when he brushes your hair to one shoulder. He secures your dress from behind, and your breath grows heavy as you watch him from the mirror.
"It is not so bad, riding a dragon," the prince says to plant a false sense of trust in you, "who knows? You might enjoy it."
There is an unnatural warmth that spills across your form when your husband then completes your braids. He weaves in a manner far gentler than Gwayne ever has. It makes your lips part.
He brings you to your feet. Daemon takes in your expression, lips curling slightly, "there you are, wife."
Your brows knit.
He knew his artificial gentleness has you off-guard. There is no better moment to have you do his bidding than now.
One might be surprised to know that Caraxes actually enjoyed having you on his back, as did Daemon, not because they suddenly liked you— gods no, but because the sound of your screams were oh-so satisfying.
You could do little else but release cries of terror as you clung to your husband from behind. Daemon made it a point to do flips and all sorts of unnecessarily moves whilst flying, hoping your hold would falter. The time you spent in the air felt like eternity. It seemed your husband was set on touring the entire 7 realms.
You never thought you would be so ever happy to see the pit. The pit could not say the same about you however. You spill your guts out to the floor exactly like the first time you were here.
Daemon makes a face. He turns to the keepers and orders them to clean your mess up, lest it get on Caraxes' claw.
Woe is you who is forced to repeat the exact thing the next morning. You could not even plead your case, for your throat was sore. The sound of your screams this time were not as entertaining to Daemon, as your voice is hoarse. At some point, the terror is too great, you cannot scream. Because of this, he cuts the flight short in boredom, excited instead at the promise of watching you suffer through another retch. But, oh, by the gods, were you an inconveniencing woman.
Instead of remaining consistent, you just had to make a show and faint into him, did you?
He could not care less for you, which is why he chucks you off into the arms of a dragon keeper, but the damned old man could no longer carry such a weight, and so he was begrudgingly forced to throw you over his shoulder and bring you to a maester himself.
In truth, he'd all forgotten about his wife fainting until the next morning, when he came to the maester's quarters to ask for something to soothe his hammering head from his heavy drinking the night before. He was, in fact, offended, when the maester insinuated that he had come to check up on his bride.
Before he could give the greying maester a piece of his mind, he hears a terrible voice barking from the ward. Its grating timbre made it clear to Daemon that Lord Hand Cunttower was off on a yapping session again.
He walks deeper into the room. Weeping sounds become audible.
"—no, you do not understand," Otto snaps, hunched over at the side of your bed.
Ah, twas you who was being terrorized.
You dare not turn to your father, for you knew your throat would only tighten more that it already has. You force yourself to take deep breaths, but it's easier said than done. You remain still on the bed you laid on.
"You must sire as many children as your body can take, or you will die," the man says.
But you were dying anyway.
"The process will not be pleasant."
Nothing is pleasant.
"It will hurt-"
Everything hurts.
"-but it is a better fate than-"
"Enough!" you snap, glaring at him with angry, red eyes. You repeat, though your voice is weaker, "enough, enough, eno-"
Otto gravely speaks your name. Your body recognized the danger, but having realized upon waking up to the face of a maester, it mattered little where or who it came from, you were destined to hurt- to die.
"Do not fall complacent be-"
"You are no longer my lord," you quip. Sweat forms on your nape. This is the first time you've ever interrupted your father.
He is gobsmacked. He is bewildered. His back straightens, "what?"
You feel yourself descend into heavy fraught. Your saliva tries to choke you.
"What," he presses, "did you say, girl?"
"You are my father," your voice falters, "but not my lord."
Otto's face warps.
Your breath grows shorter and shorter, "my liege lord is my-" pant "-husband, and what he-" pant "-desires, I will-" pant "-do."
Daemon's ears and brows perk at your misplaced loyalty. Part of him wants to laugh out loud and make himself known, but then he sees, even from where he stood, how it got Otto twisted. He chuckles to himself instead.
Your father enunciates as though he means to stab you with them, "you stupid fucking whore."
You crumble like chalk. You fall into another round of body arresting tremors. Your chest is tight and you screw your eyes painfully shut. It becomes apparent to Daemon, as it would anyone who'd witness, where your condition sourced. Otto grabs your shoulders, "you know nothing of-" but then recoils.
Daemon shoves him away, glaring as he says, "unhand her."
Otto manages to balance himself, but he looks as though the veins on his temples were about to pop. He clenches his jaw, "I am speaking to my daughter."
"You mean at her," his silver hair slips over his shoulder as he turns to you, "she does not look like she can hold conversation."
"This is personal matter," Otto steps forward.
"Mmm," Daemon turns back to him, "I do say, I am glad to have interrupted," he shifts on his leg, linking his fingers together, "a dutiful husband should know all personal matters of his wife. Don't you agree?"
Though you were still wrestling with yourself, you heard every word. You knew if you did not interject, they will fight each other for your carcass. You feel lightheaded, but you force yourself to open your eyes and speak.
Of course, the only sound you manage to make is a strangled and pained one.
Otto averts his attention to you, and tries to come to your side.
Daemon steps in front of him and tilts his head back, "oh... I would adore it if you give me a reason to kill you."
You choke out, "Daemon."
Your father stiffens as he looks past the said man to inspect you, missing the way said man smirks. Otto turns back to Daemon, feeling bile spread in his mouth as the prince says, "see. She does not want you."
Otto's lips curl and his hands ball into fists.
Your husband waves a hand, "go away. You're clearly upsetting her."
Otto does the most to remain calm, "she is my da-"
"She is my wife," Daemon snaps, imposing upon him.
You gulp with difficulty as you catch the way your father's jaw clenches. You force yourself to sit up and open your mouth to speak, but everyone's attention is averted to the Kingsguard that walks into the room.
Daemon's forehead curls at the Cargyll knight, "my prince. Lord Hand."
"Which one are you?" asks the prince.
"Arryk, my prince."
"State your business, Arryk."
"I-"
"I requested a ward for the princess," Lord Hand answers instead.
Daemon makes a face at him and chuckles dryly under his breath.
Arryk looks between the two again then slowly continues, "I and my brother have been awarded the honor of serving ward to the Princess of Dragonstone. I take first watch today."
Daemon chuckles again, "a bit late, aren't you?"
The white cloak stiffens then bows, "I was just given word this hour."
"Hmm. Well, Arryk," he motions, "why don't you go escort the Lord Hand out of the room before someone dies."
He stiffens again, but turns to the said man nonetheless. He does not question it and merely does what was instructed.
Or at least tries to.
"I do not trust you with my daughter's well-being," Otto steps forward, pointing a finger to the ground, "you are the very reason she is in that bed."
Daemon gasps dramatically. At this point, you finally had enough wits about you to speak, "please-" but your voice is easily drowned out however.
"Do you not remember thanking my brother for the, what was it," the prince pretends to think, "joyous union? Or would you like to watch me stake my claim upon he—"
Otto's face twists in horror and repulsion, but that is not why Daemon's words are cut short. It is because of the cold, clammy, trembling hand that takes his own that he looks down. He watches as you sigh out, "leave us, father."
The said man turns to you in grave offence. In your fear, you do not notice the betrayal that is mixed with it. His anger flares and he scoffs. He gives you one last look, and you knew exactly it was just that. This would be last time he would ever look upon you. When he storms away, you feel it in your chest: this is the last time you will ever call him father. You were forsaken, truly forsaken.
Otto is seen out by Arryk.
Your hand slips from Daemon's, as you no longer had the strength. You muster all your remaining energy to reach the drink propped on your bedside table. It was a futile attempt though, as instead of grasping it, you knock it over, which only leads you into another fit of tears.
Daemon curses and shakes his foot that's gotten soaked. He did mean to snap at you for it, but you were already clearly suffering. Your breathing is short and it seemed like you were mumbling something.
He hunches over in an attempt to hear you, "what?"
It takes a myriad of repetitions for him to realize you were apologizing.
His face contorts, "gods," what pathetic creature had he been given to?
Daemon's upper lip curls and he can no longer bear the sound of your whining any further. He calls for the maester, asking for another cup of water because you had knocked over your own. Just as the maester goes off to get you another drink, he remembers he came here for his own affliction because his head begins to hammer again. He rubs his temples and sits on the vacant bed besides yours.
"Here, my prince," the maester says upon arrival, "milk of the poppy enough for the both of you."
Daemon squints as the man places a tray on your bedside table. Daemon is handed a cup first, but does not drink it until after he watches you be helped to drink your own fill. After, the maester promptly leaves with a curt nod. The drink does not take effect on you until after Daemon finishes his own
Your voice shakes, "t-thank you."
Daemon puts his cup down.
"You did not have to come," you say softly.
"Do not flatter yourself," he scoffs, "I did not come for you. I came for my headache."
"Yet it remains," you turn to him, face tight and gleaming from all the tears you've shed, "you did not have to come."
He stares at you for a moment. You looked so frail, so devoid of hope. Truly, death would be mercy to you at this point.
Just then, ser Arryk returns. He finally sees you and gives you a deep bow, "princess."
Being addressed as such makes you feel sad... and lonely.
"I am ser Arryk Cargyll. I will be your ward, along with my twin brother, Erryk, who you will meet after my shift." The kingsguard straightens up, "I will do all that I can to ensure your health does not falter and that you are always seen to."
You think of your own twin as you take in the man's features. The idea that your father purposefully chose twin brothers as your ward made you feel sad and sick, but it was hardly Arryk's fault Otto liked mocking you, so you smile at him, "I have a twin."
The man nods, offering you a smile far more genuine than yours, "aye. Ser Gwayne Hightower. He is deft with the short sword."
You turn to your hands, recalling just a few days ago when you had watched him train. Your lips curl upwards, "though, not as good as I."
Daemon pulls his head back, face contorting. He is taken aback when Arryk's sniggers. The latter nods, "perhaps you will show me your tricks, my lady."
There is a twinkle in your eye as you turn back to him, "perhaps."
Daemon raises a brow at the interaction and decides to stand, "come," he reaches a hand to you, "some fresh air would do you good."
Fresh air? Your jaw slacks and you turn to Daemon with a fallen expression. Be as it was, you were no fool. You did not believe your husband had your best interest in mind, and yet, it was not like you had much of a choice. Against yourself, you to take his hand.
He pulls you up and Arryk comes to your side to assist you. He helps you to your feet, hand on your arm and shoulder.
Daemon is annoyed by his fussing. "Yes. Very good, Cargyll. I can manage to bring her to the dragon pit myself."
You close your eyes and sigh. Just as your dreaded.
"Dragon pit?" Arryk repeats.
"Yes. She needs fresh air." The prince narrows his eyes, "do you contest me?"
Arryk releases you and shakes his head, "I would not."
"Good," he motions with nod, "out of the way then."
You see, after being scorched by the fire of your maker— your father, the sight of Caraxes emerging from the depths did not strike as much fear into you as it did before. In fact, the promise of malice from the beast felt... cathartic, and for once, you welcomed Daemon's insistence on being brought to its maw.
You stumbled against Caraxes' scaly cheek. Having done nothing but lay in the maester's chambers, your hair was not tied or braided in any way. As the wind blew, it tickled against the dragon's face. Caraxes did not seem to enjoy the sensation, and so he growled and snapped his teeth.
Daemon was quick to chastise his mount, and for that, he did not realize your lack of self-preservation. Oh, but Caraxes did; he even growled again, only to be met once more by your unflinching demeanor.
Daemon would only realize your change after taking flight and landing on a beach. Upon dismounting, Caraxes takes it upon himself to screech as you hover. The prince doesn't know who is more bewildered, him or his dragon, when you screech back.
Your neck veins pop and spit comes out of your mouth at the intensity of it all. A harsh wind blows your hair and your skirt. You heave after releasing such a harsh noise.
In truth, perhaps Caraxes is more perturbed as, unlike Daemon's who presses forward, the beast pulls back and shakes his head. He bleats as he watches his rider grab your arm.
The prince means to berate you for your insanity, but then, gods, you rather conveniently succumb to another arrest to your heart and lungs. He does not know why he catches you when your legs give in but he knows exactly why he suggests: "get in the water."
You look up at him, your glassy eyes meeting his violet ones.
He lets you crumble to the ground and bends down to undo your dress, "a swim would do you wonders."
"N-no- you will regret-" you sputter.
But Daemon ignores you, not that it took much effort, for you were incoherent soon enough.
He pulls you out of your dress until you're in nothing but your slip. You sob, and he hushes you, assuring he will be by your side. He removes his tunic. Soon, he is dragging you down deeper and deeper, and you are choking and spitting saltwater.
Daemon decides to simply release you and wait until your body floats lifeless. With how you were gasping, it would not take long. He turns his head when his face is splashed by your flailing arms. When he looks back, the water is calm and your body is nowhere to be seen.
... well, that was rather quick.
He waits for a moment, watching bubbles float up. After a while, he purses his lips and decides to go back ashore. He should have done this sooner.
He freezes when you emerge in front of him, pushing your brown hair off your face. He is perturbed by the serenity across your features; it was as though you were reborn.
You sigh, "I told you you would regret it."
Daemon blankly stares at you.
"There is a great river in Oldtown," you wade around, "the water there is not nearly as pleasant or warm as this, but still... swimming was one of the only ways I could calm myself."
His jaw clenches. He does not even try to hide his disappointment.
You lick your lips at it and turn to Caraxes, who was happily soaking in the sun from the sandy shore, "take heart. Your dragon might entertain himself by eating me yet," you turn to him, "or perhaps my Lord Hand will kill me himself."
His face twists, "what?"
You shake your head and roll your eyes.
He pulls his head back, offended and confused by your sudden nerve.
You allow your body to float up in the water, "you need not pretend. I know you long to kill me."
Daemon is insulted by your brashness. He grabs your floating hip and pushes you down until you're once again face to face. Not a semblance of fear is on your features. It only angers him further.
He snaps, "I could have your tongue for that."
He cannot deny the way his stomach rolls when you place your hands by the base of his neck. The complete change in your temperament puts him on edge. Have you been playing him all along?
"Would it not be simpler to have my head?" you speak plainly, as though you were genuinely curious of his response.
His nostrils flare.
Before he can act, you are swimming off. You emerge from the water, dripping wet. Your clothing is sheer and hugs every part of your body, leaving nothing to the imagination. He could not help but look, but then he was sorely insulted all over when you pet Caraxes head and he lets you.
It was a twisted hallucination. He is suddenly reminded of the milk of the poppy he'd drank; you've probably poisoned him and planned all of this with your cunt father like the conniving whore you really were.
You do not hear him emerge, but only know he did because he is upon you. He forces you around through a severe squeeze on your arms, "what is your game, Hightower cunt?!"
Your body seizes, but you do not succumb to the thundering of your heart, as you had just been relaxed.
He shakes you, making you gasp, "SPEAK!"
"There is no game!" you whimper.
He chuckles dryly, shaking you harshly once more "perhaps it should be said that need I no assistance from my dragon to kill you."
A shiver runs down your spine, "please-"
"Then tell me th-"
"-just do it."
The sound of Caraxes huffing brings Daemon back to reality. And yet it takes you speaking, "just kill me," for him to realize you meant exactly what he thought.
He stills where you descend into further torment. He knows then that it is true. There was no plot, or at least not one where this creature of agony could ever oversee. You were calmed by the water, but not cured. Very truly, he thinks again death would be mercy, convenient for him as well. Yet, in his nature, Daemon does opposite of what he is told and pries his hands off. He mutters under his breath, "ao mūdas run," you terrible thing.
You sob, as if you understood him.
You shed tears unlike the others he's witnessed; there is no panic or fear, only pain.
"Surely you agree it is better than living this way."
The clarity of your voice takes him aback. He turns away, uncomfortable of your sudden agency.
"I have been this way since I can remember," you confess, "and they've all have counted my days for just as long."
"Why must I bloody my hands for you?" he squints, "if you despise living so much, do it yourself."
Your laugh is haunting. You shake your head and wipe your face, "I am not as brave as you. I could not even kill the fishes Gwayne caught for me, though I ate them."
Daemon is unmoved, twice so at the mention of your brother.
"And Gwayne..." you sigh, "he would blame himself." You turn to your feet, warmed by the sand beneath it, "I would not do that to him." You shake your head again, "but again, take heart," you smile, "it will happen soon enough."
His forehead curls.
"I can feel it in my gut," you rub your belly, "it is putrid and festering... whatever it is."
He tilts his head, "then do me a favor and wallow in silence—" he walks off, sparing one last glance, "and try scheming with your cunt father somewhere you will not be caught."
You manically laugh and rip at your hair, "he is my illness, if it is not plain to you."
He stops and turns back to you.
"I am the way that I am because I-" you poke your chest, "am he, had he been born a woman." You rub your sternum, "he loathes me because he is I. I am his hair, his nose, his temper, his... weakness, only amplified because I did not inherit his cock.
"When I pray..." you sniffle, "sometimes I think the gods keep me alive for I am his reckoning— that I must torment him for all the years he has tormented others... tormented me."
Daemon watches the salt from your eyes join the salt on your slip. He stares at your pert nipples then watches you chew your lower lip. He licks his own, "did you mean what you told him?"
You watch as he inches closer, "what?"
"That he is no longer your liege lord," he reaches for your arm, "that I am."
"I-"
Daemon pushes the shoulder of your slip dress down.
Your hand darts to his chest, "i-it is the truth."
He hums and tilts his head. You gasp when he kisses your neck. He licks the saltwater off your skin, enjoying the sound you make when his teeth graze you, "very well then."
Goosebumps form when he pulls your skirt up your thighs.
"It would be beneath a prince to withhold aid for such a tormented spirit."
You do not speak for soon his mouth is claiming yours. It is not as horrid as you imagined it would be. You did not think someone who's shown nothing but aggression could behold you so tenderly. You shiver when he continues to rid you of your sopping clothes. When you break away for air, you manage to mutter, "someone c-could see."
Daemon's expression is changed as stares at you and pushes you to the ground. You gasp as you find yourself atop the garbs he already managed to remove. He undoes his breeches, "who? My dragon?"
You do not know if he means Caraxes.
"You are my wife," he drops to his knees, grabbing yours, "the sin lies with the looker," he pushes your legs apart, "not us."
You bite your lips, feeling the the need to repel him, but decide against it. You simply close your eyes and dig your fingers into the sand.
His loins burn at the sound of your sigh. He sinks into you and relishes your submission. He wraps your legs around him and rocks his hips into yours. You mewl and dig into his back. He bites your lobe before whispering, "you belong to me."
You scratch your nails up his back as his rocking hips send bolts of pleasure in your body.
"Say it."
"I-I-" you heave, "belong to you."
He squeezes your thighs, "you are to do what I so desire."
Your gasp softly when he grabs your jaw, making you turn to him.
"-especially if it is against your father, yes?"
You gulp, unable to speak. You simply nod.
Daemon's eyes become hooded. He releases your jaw, claiming your thigh again, "good."
You both remain this way, kissing and rubbing, but then you begin to grow impatient. You bring your mouth to his to catch his attention but do not kiss him. He is taken aback by your unintentional tease and digs his fingers into your flesh. This is why you whimper as you speak, "you- can... enter."
He is broken from his trance, "what?"
"I," you scratch his skin gently, as if to encourage him, "know you are ready. You do not have to hold back. I am accustomed to pain."
He knits his brows, then tilts his head, "how could a virgin know such things?"
He watches bashfulness claim you. You shake your head, "I read it."
"Did your book not tell you it need not be painful?"
"I-" you let out a loud noise when you feel his fingers touch your womanhood, "Daemon-"
He purrs at the sound of his name, "I will show you how good it can feel so that you can tell your father all about it."
The horrifying thought does not even register as he makes you feel things you did not know possible. You begin to shiver and whine, but it is entirely opposite to what your body is accustomed to. Your breath begins to shorten and you instinctively begin to panic, but Daemon's voice keeps you grounded.
"Breathe," he licks your pulse, "it feels good, does it not? Breathe and think of how good I'm making you feel."
You are entirely subservient to him, to his baritone, to his fingers, to his hips. There is nothing but sand and Daemon. You whine when you feel a hard intrusion. The sensation is foreign, and it causes your belly to tense.
He kisses the line that forms between your brows, "relax, my wife. Now is not the time for pain," he hooks his hands behind your knees, "it's a time for pleasure."
It's all a blurry haze after this. Daemon moves into you in a way that makes you wonder how this could ever hurt. Every thrust sends ripples of bliss down your spine. Every hit draws out the lewdest of sounds from your throat. You understand then why they call it love making; you love every moment of it. Your bliss is heightened when he touches something inside you, and again, and again-
For once in your life, as your breath grows heavy, you do not feel like you're about to die.
Daemon alternates tempos, but ultimately resigns to fast and hard. He does not cease until your rigid body goes limp beneath him. The pressure in your stomach breaks into a million burning pieces, and just as it becomes all too much, he pulls out, propping himself up on one arm. You gasp at the heat the spills on your thigh as he strokes himself. Soon, his arm gives out and he collapses beside you.
You behold the mess of red and white between your legs, but find no shame, only arousal, which you did not expect. You turn to your husband, watching his chest heave, his temples sweat, and his tongue lick his lips.
He's... he's beautiful.
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Shining Bright | James Potter x Reader
Marauders Masterlist / Inbox
Summary: You and James reunite after the winter holiday, reminiscing old memories and stumbling into new ones. Except Sirius doesn't know you're dating yet, and James is not particularly good at hiding it anymore.
Content Warnings/Tags: Smut, fluff, angst kinda idk, Reader is Sirius' sister (how do I even tag that), 18+, hinting at abuse, simping, traumatizing bystanders, not proofread just go with it, no use of y/n, ignore any plotholes
Word Count: 4.0k
A/n: I listened to the hazbin hotel soundtrack on repeat while writing and I'm praying it doesn't show. This was gonna make this longer but then I got impatient so lemme know if you'd like more. Not kidding when I say it's not proofread this came straight out of my notes so sorry for any mistakes, will come back later to fix them xx
The black family siblings were all as bright as the stars they were named after, James knew this for a fact. Sirius was the brightest star in the night sky, scorching others with his light in a way you couldn't look away from even if you wanted to. Regulus, not as blinding as his brother, but shining in his own right amongst those who took the effort to look for the constellation he carried with him. And you, you were a puzzle James couldn't yet solve, the light luring him in like that spark people spend their lives looking for, never sure if they'll ever get to hold it.
After Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor in his first year, your parents had been very strict about who you socialized with, not wanting any further damage to the oh so carefully crafted family image. Not that it mattered, you and Sirius found plenty of ways to talk, most people didnt care enough to snitch and the ones who did were familiar enough with what you both were capable of to watch their tongues. Sirius was more loud and proud in his defiance, living up to his namesake in the sky, but you were better at hiding it, playing into the part people expected. Yes, Sirius was a fallen star, and your parents had worried he’d drag you with him, but you only shined brighter in his absence, trying to make up for the light lost as if something wasnt permanently dimming it.
And that's exactly what he was worried about right now, because you were never really yourself after a holiday at the Black family manor, always a part of you left behind, a part dimmed. But James was your sun, always there shining bright enough to ignore anything else, because with his light you were never truly dulled. He had missed you, he had missed you so much, your relationship was fresh, but he had been head over heels from the first time you kissed. He had been replaying the memory in his head so often he could almost see it.
You were slytherin’s head girl, just as he was gryfindoors head boy, and you had run into each other while doing rounds of the hallways. Typically this would be a job for the prefects, but for some reason the both of you had decided to take over their duties for the evening, you called it luck, James called it destiny.
It was simply banter while walking down the halls, and it was mostly at James’ expense, but he wouldn’t trade the moment for anything. He was loud with his body, moving his hands as he talked and sometimes kicking his feet ahead of him, but you were more quiet, more calculated. So James did what he always did, talk. “I had a dream once about a glass of strawberry lemonde except it was only as big as my pinky finger, and there was this duck who tried to keep stealing it from me.” You stop in your tracks as he finishes his rant, staring right at him. “Oh my god, I had the exact same dream.” “Really?” his eyes were wide as he saw your face change.
“Are you crazy, of course I didn’t.” You fell back into step and he hurriedly caught up with you again. “Well you never know, Sirius and I have the same dreams sometimes, I mean we’re basically brothers-”
“Does that make me basically your sister?” Your eyebrows were raised at him as you asked your question, and he had to do his best not to trip over his own feet as he answered.
“What, no!-” his face had turned bright red rather quickly, and you would probably never admit this to him, but you had found it quite endearing. “I don’t, I just don’t think of you as a sister, definitely not a sister.” Somehow you had turned him into a nervous wreck in under a minute, and you were quickly getting addicted to the effect you had on him, letting him tumble over his words further.
“Like, if I married you, Sirius would be my brother but you wouldnt be my sister, you know. Those two things don’t have to go togethe-” his thoughts slowly trailed off as he turned his head to look at you, a bright smile now evident on your face, and if this is how your face lit up, he’d gladly make a fool of himself for the rest of his life. “You’ve been thinking about marrying me?” Your head was turned up towards him, challenging him to continue his train of thought. He looked frantically around him as if searching for an answer, hiping the right thing to say would magically appear, but of course it didnt. “What, of course not, I don’t wanny marry you. Wait- no i mean, hypothetically I would but-” “You can relax James, I’m just messing with you” Your shoulders were slightly shaking, suppressing laughter he was desperate to hear. “Right” The tension seeped out of him right as he started laughing himself, and it was so infectious you couldnt help but join him in it.
The two of you fell into an effortless silence as you continued, and James was about to break it before you beat him to the punch.
“You know, right now would be a great moment to kiss me” he was sure he would get whiplash from the way his head turned towards you. The look on your face didnt give anything away, and for a moment he had wondered if he had made it up. “If that's the sort of thing you’d want to do” you were looking down at your shoes now, roles reversed as you had become the nervous one, and for another moment he just stared at the blush creeping up on your face before he realised he should probably say something, anything.
“Don’t you think this is wrong? '' Alright, maybe that wasnt the right something to say, but he genuinely pondered before you put his worries to rest. “dont you think that’s up to us to decide?” You were looking up to him now, eyes enchanting him with a single glance.
“If Sirius finds out-” “I won’t tell if you don’t”
“Well- “James, do you want to kiss me or not?” “Merlin, yes.” with that the last of James’ self control was lost, and he pushed you into the wall behind you as his lips found yours, dedicated to explore you for as long as youd let him. You melted into the kiss just as quickly, leaning your body into him as he pressed up against you. James was eager with everything he did, and this was no exception. His hands didnt know where to go, never staying still for long as they roamed your body, you couldve sworn they were little rays of sunshine, lighting you up everywhere he touched. Your own hands found their way to the nape of his neck, tugging at some hair, resulting in a small moan leaving him, and after the taste you were desperate for more. James found himself in a similar situation, completely forgetting his surroundings as his mouth made its way to your neck, trailing kisses down from by your ear to your pulse point until you were silently moaning his name, begging him not to stop, not that he’d ever dare to.
He continued his assault on your neck, his hands trailing up higher and higher underneath your shirt, longing to feel more of you, you tugged at his hair again and led him back to your face, connecting your lips once more, this time more sloppy, your patience completely gone.
James was ready to drop to his knees for you, and he would have if he didnt hear someone nearly shriek behind him. He turned around, coming face to face with a second year Hufflepuff who looked close to fainting, stuck in place at the corner she had just turned.
“Shit” he mumbled as he leaped forward, not sure whether to comfort the girl or scold her for being out past curfew. As James looked back at you you were close to losing it, and he couldnt deny the humour of the situation himself. In the end the two of you walked the girl back to her common room, not too worried about the situation with how in shock she seemed to be.
So yes, winter break had left him simply wishing to be near you again, and now he was so close he could almost already feel you in his arms again. He had debated telling Sirius, it would be so much easier, since he had moved in with the Potters a while ago and James was struggling to keep his yearning for you to himself, he was sure his parents had figured it out already, but simply choose to let him deal with it on his own for now. Everytime you send Sirius an owl he wanted to take him by the shoulders and shake him, hoping that information about you would fall out like loose change.But he knew Sirius couldn't know, he knew that. Everyone assumes it's James who can't keep a secret, always wearing his heart on his sleeve, but really that's only because he's never really had a reason not to. Truly, it was Sirius who couldn't keep a thing to himself, once he knew, half of Hogwarts knew, he just couldn't stop himself from talking about the things that excited him, which was one of the qualities James so adored, but not one which would play in your favour at the moment.
You were still living with your parents, still subject to their ways and while James had begged you to come live with him as well, you were hesitant. Hesitant to leave Regulus behind, hesitant to leave the life you had grown so accustomed to, even if it wasn't a good one. The both of you knew your parents would never approve, sure, James held the pureblood status, but it had lost its value the moment he harboured Sirius.
And so when the winter holiday came to an end and they once again reached Hogwarts, James was the embodiment of pure excitement. He was glad no one was questioning it, most likely brushing it off as joy at reuniting with his friends, which wasn't entirely untrue.
For a little while he truly got lost in seeing everyone again, trading stories with Remus and Peter about what they had been up to, discussing pranks that needed to be set ij motion to make up for lost time, but when the start of term party took place and he walked down to the common room with the others he froze in his tracks, because there you were. For a split second he wondered if it had been a dream, he had been having them so often now, but Sirius rushed past him to envelop you in a hig so tight you spilled half of your drink over yourself, cursing at him in such a soft tone of endearment as you hugged him back.
"I've missed you, you know" Sirius was beaming at you, doing a quick double check of you, something James used to not think much about until je started doing it himself after he found the strange bruises none of you dared to speak of.
"Yes Siri, I do know" you chuckled back at him, and in that moment all the worry disappeared.
"I've missed you too"
The rest of the group caught up with the two of you, and it was Remus who first spoke
"It's good to see you back" he acknowledged with a small nod, not one for big gestures, but you had all learned it truly was the thought that counts.
"It's good to be back, now if you'll excuse me, I have to go change so there's no longer firewhiskey all over my shirt" You gave a pointed look at Sirius, but his antics were nothing new to you.
"Just use one of my sweaters so you don't have to go all the way back to the slytherin dorms, I have some extras upstairs" sirius nudged his head towards the stairs, you gave him a final hug as you moved to take him up on his offer.
As you walked by him James could smell the blend of vanilla and rosemary that was still there despite the liquor, it intoxicated him like a drug he was already hooked on, finally getting a fix of it after so long apart, and he had to remind himself not to grab you and kiss you right then and there.
You disappeared from his sight as you went up to the dorms and it only took another second for James' brain to spring to action.
"I gotta go"
"What, why? We just got here" he knew he would need a better excuse, but the fuses in his head weren't connecting.
" forgot my wand" is what splurged out
"Why would you need your wand we're-" thankfully it was Sirius's short attention span that came to the rescue, because the moment he saw Marlene he made a beeline to go see her. James wondered if he had it in him to explain his actions to Peter and Remus, but neither of them seemed to mind much, so he sprinted off to the stairs as well.
As soon as he got to his dorm, he reminded himself to knock, not wanting to startle you.
"Merlin Sirius, how am I meant to find anything in this mess?" James creaked the door open to see you rummaging through your brother's trunk, still looking for the sweater you had come up here to find.
"Why don't you just wear one of mine" even the idea of it already made James's head dizzy. Your head spun around as soon as you heard his voice, and for a moment the two of you simply stood there, looking at each other like a long lost treasure. But it didn't last long, because right after James crossed the room in record time, he took you in his arms, connecting his lips with yours as if you were his last source of oxygen. The kiss was heated and filled with lust from the both of you, and James could finally let himself go, finally let his thoughts out and make them reality once more.
That’s why he decided not to waste any more time as he gently nudged you towards his bed, making sure you wouldnt hit the headboard as the both of you laid down. He remembered the path he was trailing down your neck with his eyes closed, had remembered the way your breath hitched and your hips squirmed everytime he did so. All he had to do was follow the same signs and you were a mess underneath him in no time. His hands made their way up underneath your skirt, massaging the skin underneath his fingertips as he heard you moaning out his name, pleading for him to keep going, and he was more than happy to fullfill your request. He continued his way down until he came face to face with your whiskey stained shirt, not thinking twice before taking it off you, but from how you were quick to connect his lips with yours once more you didnt seem to mind. But James was a man on a mission, and it was not one he was willing to abandon. So he willed himself to ignore the whine that left you as he moved away from the kiss, knowing you’d forgive him for it soon enough.
He found his way to your chest and took in the sight for sore eyes you were to him, once again glowing underneath him. He was starting to suck bruises onto your skin, love marks he knew only he would see, and when he would next time he’d be just as eager to leave even more of them behind. Having you like this again, feeling the heat of your skin against him, your hands tugging at his curls as he could hear more and more moans slip out of you, it got him hard in his trousers simply thinking about all the things you’d let him do to you, all the things he’d do for you. He was rutting his hips into the mattress, desperate for the friction of it, his hands krept up further towards your cunt, inching further up until he could slide your underwear to the side and feel just how wet you were for him. His mouth was still busy on your chest as one of his fingers found its way inside of you, making you arch your back towards him. “Fuck darling, your pussy feels just as good as I remember” You wanted to reply to him, telling him how good he felt inside of you, his long hands reaching places you never could on your own, but your words failed you as just another moan left you, your exterior having crumbled down in a matter of minutes thanks to the one and only James Potter, but he seemed to know exactly what was going on.
“I know baby, I’ll take good care of you don’t worry”
He had never broken a promise before, and he wasn’t about to start now, he added a second finger, crooking them inside of you towards the one spot that would turn your vision white as if you were staring straight into the sun itself. If this had been any other moment you might have been embarrassed about how fast you were starting to reach your high, but James wasnt the only one who had been waiting for this, dreaming about seeing each other again, counting down the days. It took him only a little while longer, encouraged only further by your laboured breathing until he was sure he was about to reach his own climax simply from the sounds you were making underneath him as he coaxed you through it. But he didnt give you much time to recover, not letting you catch your breath as he went further down the bed until he could start kissing your thighs, giving in to the urge to bite some of the fat leading up to your cunt, it made you produce a small shriek, and it encouraged him even further.
So he wasted no more time, attaching his lips to your clit and lapping at it like a man starved, wanting to make you cum again, wondering how fast he could make you come undone again. His tongue hungrily took in all the juices from your previous orgasm and from the next one creeping closer and closer. His nose kept bumping against your clit as his mouth was now on your opening, not quite reaching the spots his finger could but oh so heavenly in a whole other way. He was dangerously close to his own high now, rather sure he’d reach it the moment you started spasming underneath him from the overstimulation. But he wasnt letting down just yet, doubling down on his efforts as he felt you grow restless, gracing his ears with whimpers and whispers reserved only for him. He could tell you were about to tip over the edge, knew you and your body well enough by now to see the signs before you even registered them yourself. “You can let go, I’ve got you” he accentuated his words with a soft squeeze to your inner thighs as he could feel you melt into him and took everything you would give him.
“I’m pretty sure you just beat your record” you were breathless but you were already softly giggling as a wide smile broke on his face, proud of himself for his endeavors but furthemore proud of how he had been able to get you to let your walls down around him, how you had let him help you disassemble them brick by brick with each passing day. It was still early in the relationship, but James had never been so sure as to the fact that he loved you, because your presence made him shine even brighter than he already did, and he wasnt sure how much longer he could keep it contained. He moved back up the bed, caging you in with his arms as he leaned down to kiss you, no longer hurriedly or messy, but soft and delicate like the first rays of morning light.
Just as he did so however, someone came barelling in the room, and James cursed himself for not having locked it.
“You better not be cutting one of my shirts into a tank-top again- holy fuck” Sirius very nearly landed face first into the hard wood flooring as he caught sight of the two of you before he he steadied himself on the dresser. The both of you shot up from your positions on the bed, and, ironically enough, approached him as one would a startled deer. “What in Merlin’s beard were you two just doing” He looked as if he was contemplating life itself, and you almost felt bad for him
“What, nothing, you’re drunk-” James tried to defend, but you were rather sure there was no way out of this one.
“I’m not drunk, I’m sober and that's the problem” He was flailing his hands around now, and it was hard to suppress the laugh bubbling its way up your throat.
“Don’t laugh, this is not a situation to laugh at” he was trying to be stern, but it didnt quite suit him.
“It’s alright Sirius, James and I have been seeing each other for a little while now” He was no longer shocked, no, his current expression better resembled being offended.
“And neither of you told me” he was nearly shouting now, but the party downstairs was loud enough that it didn’t really matter anyway.
“We haven’t told anyone, and youre not exactly the best at keeping secrets.”
“Excuse me, I’m great at keeping secrets, I never told you he’s had a crush on you since third year, but apparently I should have”
“Completely forgot I ever told you that” James’ shoulders had lost their tension as he stood next to you now, slowly reaching out for your hand.
“I will go now before either of you scar my eyes any further” Sirius said as he made his way back to the dorm door.
“Oi Moony, wait till you hear- fuck I can’t tell you” He had made a complete mood shift once more as he turned fuzzy, wanting to tell someone the news immediatly.
“It’s fine, Remus knows.” You tell him, interlacing your fingers with James’ in the meantime.
This time he looked betrayed again, halfway down the stairs already as you could hear him yelling. “You knew and didnt tell me?!” and it was faint, but you could make out Remus’ voice as well. “Of course I knew, I have eyes” The two of you looked at each other as he placed a simple kiss on top of your hair, a small gesture of affection that would become increasingly more common with time. He turned around briefly to grab something from his trunk and before you could register it he had already asked, the shirt in his hand.
“Still gotta change your top, why don’t you take my jersey” It made your heart flutter as you slipped the item of clothing over your head and you went to follow Sirius downstairs, figuring this was as good a time as any to tell everyone.
#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter x y/n#james potter x you#james potter fanfic#james potter fanfiction#james fleamont potter#james potter smut#james#james x reader#james x you#james x y/n#james smut#james fluff#james angst#james potter fic#james potter fluff#marauders#the marauders smut#the marauders fanfiction#the marauders#the marauders era#the marauders fandom#marauders fanfiction#marauders era#marauders fandom#the marauders x you#marauders x y/n#the marauders x reader#marauders x you
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Abuse of Power
in which Captain Price goes on a fucking power trip over his new recruit, you ♡
tags: MDNI!, power abuse, bdsm, bondage sorta, gags, whips, spanking?, reader giving blowjob as punishment, cum on face, basically Price being a big bully because he has the power to do so
a/n: slight changes to wording, wanna change more but dk what to add you know? hope you guys enjoy this ^^ i don't think reader's gender or any genital body part is specified but i had fem!reader in mind when writing (so watch out for that, pls tell me if there's any)
you're just a rookie and have so much to learn, it must be soo stressful, yes? don't worry because Captain Price here will guide you all the way. he's your very reliable captain, so trust him won't you?
all those tasks that only you seem to get? the ones that somehow end up with you on his lap or in some odd position that could easily be misinterpreted? don’t worry about it, just listen to him! remember to call him captain or sir when talking to him, he is your superior. he’s teaching you the ropes ‘cause he’s sooo kind. you’ll need what you’ve learned with him later on ;>
monday mornings are now spent on your knees in front of him. you're tied up, hands behind your back, gagged and you have to show him you can break free. oh but the ropes are too thick.. and you can't move... and oww they dig into your skin. it hurts! too bad, Captain Price isn't going to stop practicing this with you until you manage to break free. and even then, more practice doesn’t hurt.
thursday evenings have you half naked, bent over his desk as he whips you. gosh.. you really need to build your pain tolerance, you're a crying, whimpering mess on his desk! how will you handle yourself in case some awful person tortured you for information? Captain Price realizes you need a lot of training, so why don't you come on saturdays too?
oh be careful, don't let your tears spill on the documents... geez, you really had to get the papers soaked, didn't you. guess you need a punishment.
you know how he's always palming himself during your training? well now your punishment is helping him out with that. on your knees, half naked, hands tied behind your back, ropes digging into your skin, and guess what? you're going to stay this way until he says so.
he sits in front of your kneeling body on his office chair. his cock growing harder as he lazily strokes himself. his thumb pressed on your lips telling you to open your mouth, his hand holding the side of your head. he guides you closer until the tip of his cock is touching your lower lip.
Captain Price starts slow, he's pretty lenient about your punishment, at first. but god, he's getting more and more frustrated. you are not doing it correctly. the only thing happening is his cock slipping in and out of your mouth. god, you really are dumb. well, that means he just has to teach you, so listen up. he barks out orders between groans; "suck it, rookie. just fucking- ugh, don't use your teeth" but you're a little slow on understanding his verbal orders so he has to start getting physical.
a hand on the back of your head pushing you to take his cock deeper and deeper, until your nose is in his pubic hair. you're gagging and tears begin forming in your eyes. you look up at him, teary faced and you're moaning around his cock. he grunts out a string of curses before letting you go and cumming all over your pretty face.
he'll take off your restraints, look at the bruises and red markings caused by the ropes, tells you to clean yourself up and go to med bay. how will you even explain the marks? ah, doesn't really matter either way. if they find out, that's fine by Price. he doesn't mind if others see his handiwork.
"... next week, same day, my office, at 5."
"yes sir,"
is all you say, because what else can you do? he is your captain, afterall.
#cod mw2#cod mw2 x reader#captain john price x reader#john price#captain price x reader#price x reader#john price x reader#john price smut#cod mw2 smut#cod smut#cheesy likes cod?!#price goes on a power trip#teehee power abuse#1k+ notes yipee
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NGL I do find it funny that the side of the fandom yelling “if you’re uncomfortable with the way Con showed up to a livestream with his whole bulge on prominent display you’re homophobic” is the same side of the fandom that was harboring multiple sexual predators lol throwback to the Canyon Kink Camp!! Anyway shoutout to the canyon for knowing how to be normal about people’s boundaries <3
I notice you sending this message to multiple people. On anon. Smells like teen cowardice.
So, first off -
You are lying through your teeth.
Victims of two sexual predators came forwards... and those sexual predators were immediately thrown out of the canyon. They were blocked/black-listed everywhere and deactivated! Explain to me how that is 'harbouring'?
Some weirdo also started harassing the victims because they were a friend of the perpetrators. They were...... also....... mass blocked and lost all their popularity, as far as I'm aware (I don't actually know that person, and am not on Twitter, etc.)???
Sexual predators will show up literally anywhere in society - including in your precious fandom spaces. Pretending that your half of the fandom is 'pure' and 'perfect' is, in fact, far more dangerous than acknowledging that there were predators, and dealing with them.
Especially when the antis were the ones crowing that people like me, who are abuse and rape survivors IRL, had 'no idea what abuse/rape looks like', and still are making claims like that in the tags - as well as sending asks accusing us of lying about our trauma.
All because we like a fictional character who you hate.
As for Con showing up in his underwear...
Literally nothing was showing.
You saw the SHAPE of a bulge. It was no more revealing than Tom Hiddleston's Loki outfit, and there have been uncensored gifs of that flying around willy-nilly (pun intended) for years without anyone being Shocked and Disgusted about it.
If you're not bothered by men being in underwear when you go to the beach and see guys rocking a budgie smuggler, but you're throwing a massive stink about a queer man being in his underwear on a ticketed show that was always marked as Explicit, and using it as an excuse to call him a sexual predator, I honestly don't know what to say to you.
Boundaries are real and important.
But if you went to an explicit stream and saw something mildly suggestive there, and proceed to accuse a queer man of being a sexual predator... You are the problem.
And yes, you are a homophobe.
Even if you are queer yourself, you are contributing to the dangerous rising current of accusing queer people of being 'degenerate' and 'perverse' for merely existing, because - oh, think of the children.
And that's without mentioning that Con is a vocal supporter of trans kids in the UK. We all know how queer people who dare to support trans people are unjustly painted as predators. It's happening on Tumblr, with the mass reporting and banning of trans men and women for 'inappropriate content' that is no more explicit than what cishet people have on their blogs. It's happening all over the world.
Hell, all profits from Con's livestream went to Mermaids (UK charity for trans folx) and true colours united (homeless lgbt youth charity).
Take a good long look at your argument. Take a good long look at the current political climate for queer people. Ask yourself who your insistence that Con is sexually inappropriate for... wearing underwear, is really helping.
If you feel this unsafe around even the vaguest suggestion of genitalia, the onus is on you to avoid any streams where you might encounter it. You're no different than people who read Explicit-marked work on AO3 and leave hatemail for the authors because you encountered smut.
#the izcourse#izzy hands#israel hands#izzy the spewer#izzy canyon#ofmd#our flag means death#con o'neill#ofmd fandom critical
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DANCE WITH ME - CHAPTER 5
“If you want to keep a secret, you must also hide it from yourself.”
Summary : All your life, you thought you were a beta, a simple and boring beta. Until everything change. But now that you've presented yourself as an omega, how will you manage to live and hide it from your six friends and best friend, all alphas and all in the same pack? (a/n : I'm a shit for summary I'm so sorry-)
Genre : soulmate au (of course I'm a bitch for this), omegaverse, bangtan alphas au!, omega reader, fluff, angst, eventual smut, polyamory relationships
Status : In process
Word Count : 3k
Warnings : the usual one I guess, like smut, angst, fluff (yeah its a warning for some people ) mention of depression, abusive parents (physically and morally), violence and blood, PTSD, scars, self harm,...
Tag list : @ghostlyworld @kawaiikpoplover268 @scuzmunkie @iamkookiesforyou @00ihatesnaku @stellauniverse @akemiixx01
A/N : AAAH FINALLY ! My exams are finally over... Well tbh I'm not really happy with this chapter but if I listen to my inner voice I'll just delete all my works and never writing again so... Hope you'll like it anyway ! Let me know your impressions here or in my inbox ! And again thank you so much for all thoses likes and shares !! ♥
Masterlist | ao3 | wattpad
Chapter 4 // Chapter 6
☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾
Wooyoung and you were out of breath when you fell on the floor of the dance studio, lying next to him. You turned to each other with mutual grins.
“If we don't get the best grade with this,” you muttered after a few seconds.
"You're taking the words out of my mouth!"
You laughed and straightened up to clap your hands. Wooyoung then turned around, his eyes shining.
“Don't you agree with us Sannie? What did you think?”
It was with enthusiasm that Wooyoung just addressed his boyfriend and alpha, Choi San, student in the same school as both of you, but in second year. The omega thought of calling his boyfriend to have an external opinion on the choreography they had spent the week preparing. The choice of music helped a lot to make their imaginations work, the steps, and the combinations of these had naturally come to both of you.
The deadline was approaching and even if neither you nor he was stressed by the time, you still felt some form of anxiety over the level of performance and the quality of your choreography.
You were lucky (or unlucky, depending on the perspective) to get a preview of what Jimin, Jungkook, and Hoseok were up to, and you couldn't describe how you felt because these three idiots were the most talented and dammit attractive dancers you knew.
You, too, turned to San, more nervous than your friend. It was the first time you met him in person. As you imagined, he was very impressive, very tall, and very charming.
With his arms crossed against his chest, he nodded, a smile appearing on the corner of his lips.
“Some of my graduating class and even senior year would be unable to do better! There is a very good chemistry between the two of you. You make a very good duo.”
You sighed with relief as Wooyoung jumped into his companion's arms.
Yes, choosing Finesse by Bruno Mars and Cardi B had been a very good idea.
“You know that in my eyes you will always be the best dancer in this school,” added San, hugging Wooyoung, “ah, no offense little y/n!”
“Don't worry,” you answered, laughing and waving your hand, “I'm far from being equal to anyone here in terms of talent,” you continued directly, seeing that your friend was going to intervene with your remark, but you didn’t let him the chance, “And by the way, I'm the same size as Wooyoung, I'm not small!”
You rolled your eyes at their laughs and grabbed your cell phone before lying on the floor again. You got a message from Jimin. He was in another room, busy rehearsing his solo choreography, and wanted to know when you'd be finished rehearsing to join you. Now that you think about it, it's probably been ages since you two spent time together like you used to when you were still in high school.
“By the way Noona,” Wooyoung appeared above you, while you were answering your best friend's message, “have you made any progress on your choreography? Are you still sure of your choice?”
“Hm? I think you just want to know if I choose the music you suggested, am I right?” you asked, arching an eyebrow and chuckling when you saw his innocent expression, “yeah Wooyoung, I chose Sweet but Psycho, I even finished the choreography, I just need to rework it a little and adjust a few things!”
“Really? I'll be curious to see it, can you show it to us?”
You turned to San, your cheeks flushed.
“Mingi is waiting for us Sannie! He is downstairs!” Wooyoung had just received a message, and was already grabbing his stuff, winking at you as you silently thanked him, “Next time!” He turned to you, “By the way Noona, we can give you a ride if you want!”
“Jimin is upstairs, we're planning to go home together, but thanks for offering!”
“Ah, Park Jimin, another talented monster,” San commented with a nod.
You nodded with a groan and straightened up. You accepted the hand of the alpha, “Ah, thank you. It was a pleasure to meet you, San!”
“The pleasure is mutual little y/n,” he winked at you when he saw a pout appear on your face, “Wooyoung will give you my phone number, if you need anything don't hesitate.”
“I'll give it to you by text, be safe, Cardi B!”
You nodded, a little surprised, but smiled at Wooyoung's nickname as you watched them leave, hand in hand. You were happy to meet one of Wooyoung's partners finally. San was a very respectful and pleasant person. You quickly felt comfortable in his presence.
You heard voices outside the dance studio but didn't really pay attention to them, at this time of the day, most of the rooms were still occupied by students. What you didn't know though, was that those voices belonged to Jimin and Wooyoung, who had crossed paths. Jimin greeted the omega, not forgetting to introduce himself to his boyfriend. As usual, Jimin had worn a friendly smile, a cheerful and pleasant tone, as everyone knew him.
However, when San and Wooyoung left him alone in the corridor, his smile disappeared, replaced by a neutral face. He walked into the dance hall, finding you with your back facing him.
"Noona, it's me."
You gasped as you heard the voice of your best friend, who just entered the room. You turned to him, your bag in hand, surprised he came so quickly.
You frowned slightly. Jimin seemed... absent and frustrated. Had something gone wrong during his rehearsal?
“You’re okay?” you asked as you walked towards him, "Did something happen?”
“Ah! Hm... no, not at all! I just ran into Wooyoung and... Choi San? It just surprised me!”
He rubbed the back of his head, a tight smile on his face. You tilted your head to the side, confused by his reaction.
“San is one of Wooyoung's alpha’s,” you explained as you turned on your heels to get your jacket, “I thought I told you he was in a pack with seven other people.”
Jimin nodded silently, which surprised you. Without a word, he walked over to you, and before you could open your mouth, you felt your friend's arms around your waist, clinging to you as he nuzzled his face into your neck.
“J-Jimin you…”
You heard him mutter a few words that you didn't really understand. It felt like an eternity passed since your last embrace. It was true that you had been a little physically distant since you discovered you were an omega. You tried to avoid physical contact as subtly as possible, although you didn't always succeed.
When you live with seven people with more than half of them have physical touch as a love language, it’s hard to always find a good excuse to avoid it.
You suffered a lot because just like them, you had always liked these physical marks of affection they had towards you, and inversely, you liked to show them your affection towards them in this way.
As always, your whole being was surrounded by that soft, protective warmth you only felt when they were the origin of it. This feeling was even more powerful when it came to Jimin, your best friend, the most important and precious person in your life.
You couldn't resist wrapping your arms around Jimin's chest, holding him close, and resting your head against his shoulder.
You couldn't fight against it. This was where you felt the safest in the world. Were you felt at your place. In your best friend's arms.
How you missed those moments.
“Hey… Are you sure you're all right, Jimin?”
“You have his smell, I don't like it.”
You straightened your head slightly, surprised by these words. What was he talking about?
“Who…”
“Choi San... I saw you when you took his hand to get up… and his wink…” he paused for a moment before sighing and looking into your eyes, “and… I noticed you were distant recently… you’ll not leaving us, aren’t you? You’ll not leave with them...?”
You had expected everything but this. Jimin always had a jealous and possessive side, he was the one who needed to give and receive affection the most. All this showed a great lack of self-confidence in the young man.
When you were still at school, you heard that his parents had placed him, like you, in a public school reserved for alpha males. Unfortunately, he didn't fit the physical criteria for alphas his age. When most alpha teenagers were already tall and voice-muted, Jimin was short and puffy-faced. His voice hadn't really changed until he was seventeen. Of course, different as he was, although it was not his fault, he was bullied at school.
Like you, dancing had been a refuge that had allowed him to keep his head above water.
This episode of his life had left indelible marks on him. Especially since he had not really been able to benefit from psychological support from his family. His parents thought the harassment was nothing more than teenage squabbling.
They did not approve of his decision to join this dance school. Jimin had to be patient and persuasive to get their permission, against their will. They proclaimed that he would eventually realize that he had no future in this world and that he would come back to the right path or God knows what other nonsense they had come up with, he had stopped listening to them after a while anyway.
You knew the insecurities and lack of trust your best friend had in him. He always had this constant fear of losing and being abandoned by the people he loved.
He and you were the same. You had similar schooling, your families came from the same rich environment, and had the same mentality. You had the same wounds, some of which were still open.
So unsurprisingly, the second you heard his words, the surprise passed, and your gaze softened. You put your two hands on Jimin's cheeks and started caressing them.
“Sorry,” he murmured with a sad pout, “I’m sorry I don't know why I…”
“Don't apologize,” you answered with a little smile, “it's all right…”
“No it’s not.., you don't understand,” he looked away, biting his lip nervously, “it's not all right at all… smelling his scent on you makes me... even though he's an alpha already bound,” he breathed deeply, as if he was trying to control himself, “it's like he's going to take you away from me.”
“Never.” You spoke softly as your thumb caresses his cheeks, “ Listen Jimin, nothing and no one can ever take me away from you,” you whispered, “and if... if his smell bothers you so much, replace it with your own.”
He looked up at you, his lips parted. You couldn’t resist looking down on them, biting yours nervously. Slowly, your eyes moved up to his eyes, your hands still on his soft cheeks. You were so close to him, you could feel his breath gently caressing your lips, making you shiver.
You felt him leaning closer to you, his chest now touching yours. Your lips were close, very close.
No… No, you couldn’t do that to him, nor to your friends, his partners.
You stepped back slightly. You took a long breath and ran a hand through your hair. What were you doing? And what were those words you told him?
It was that warmth again, that smell. Jimin's smell. There was this desire, this desire for him. You couldn’t control yourself. And it wasn't your hormones and your omega side this time, no. Maybe it was the distance you had put between you that amplified and rekindled the feelings you had once repressed when you were still a teenager. Your friendship has always been the most important, more than your feelings.
What were you thinking? Jimin was just your friend, your best friend. And already bonded with other people.
“Y/n you…”
“Ah, excuse me, I’m just saying nonsense,” you lied and chuckled slightly, shaking your head, “this is ridiculous, isn't it? We'd better go, Jin and Hobi must be waiting for you!”
“Don't say that,” he frowned, “this is not ridiculous, and… they're waiting for us. You and me.”
“Yeah, that's what I was saying, let's go!”
°°°
A pout appeared on your face when you heard Wooyoung’s laugh through your phone. you could have sworn you heard another one. Probably Yeosang’s, Wooyoung omega’s partner. He quickly introduced him to you when you called him twenty minutes ago.
After your… moment with Jimin, you both joined Hoseok and Jin who were waiting in their car to come home. You didn’t feel any weird mood between Jimin and you, for your greater relief. But you couldn’t forget what happened.
“I don’t see what’s funny guys!” you told them in an annoyed tone, “What would have happened if I hadn’t stepped back?”
“A Kiss? A long and passionate kiss because you both want it since you know each other. A kiss turning into a hot make-out session and even maybe…” Wooyoung makes a pause, before whispering, “A torrid and desperate fuck. Oh, that made me think that I always wanted to do it in a risky place…”
You sighed loudly not listening to your friend anymore who was rambling. Even if the simple idea of you and Jimin doing any sexual things in a place like a dance studio, when you can get caught at any moment…
You squeeze your thighs together and shook your head, your face was as red as a tomato.
“I… I can’t Woo’!”
“And why? You like him, aren’t you? More than a friend I mean.”
You opened your mouth and then closed it. You passed your hand through your hair and stood up to sit on the ground, your back against your bed and your phone on your knees.
“First he’s my best friend.” You began, hearing both omegas sighing, but you ignored them. “Second, he’s taken. Taken with people who are very close friends… And third, I’m an omega and they don’t know anything about that, things could change between us and I don’t want it…”
“Okay…First, you didn’t answer directly to my question but… I think this is the best one I could have.” Wooyoung smirked. “Second, I don’t see where’s the problem. You also have a crush on them, aren’t you?”
You frowned and stayed silent. You couldn’t deny that you liked every one of them. Really. They were all kind, and funny, you’ve never felt as safe as you do with them. And they were all hot as hell.
“Listen, I wanted to tell you this sooner,” Wooyoung began with a serious and soft voice, “but all the symptoms you describe when you’re with them, it’s not only your omega’s genes.”
“Well, actually it is, a little,” Yeosang added, “but it only works if you are interested in the alphas. Only if you want them sentimentally, and, or physically, both works.”
“When you met San this afternoon, an alpha, when he took your hand, did you feel something?”
“You mean if I had this heat in my body? This feeling of safety, these butterflies in my stomach? If I wanted to kiss him and spend my life in his arms? Of course not! I only have this with… with Jimin and… and with them… Holy shit.”
You heard two laughs and grabbed a pillow to hide your face in. You let yourself fall to the floor with a loud and desperate whimper.
Wooyoung didn’t tell you that he asked his boyfriend to come and see them during their dance practice for this specific purpose. He wanted to let you experience the difference between the feeling of being with someone you’re attracted to, and someone you’re not attracted to. Practice always was more effective than theory.
“Listen, sweetie,” you heard the deep and soft voice of Yeosang after a few seconds, “Just trust your heart. We can’t know how hard it could be for you, that’s true. But if you really love them, if you don’t want to lose them, you need to be honest.”
“And if they don’t accept you as an omega, fuck them! You’ll come live with us! Yunho hyung will like you for sure!”
“I don’t think she needs to think about that, Love. Let’s stay positive, should we?” Yeosang sighs, making you chuckle.
But Yeosang was right. And that’s why you felt so guilty. You knew you needed to be honest with the boys. Plus, with your avoidant behavior towards them, Jimin thought you planned to leave them, which was the last fucking thing you wanted.
Well, for your feelings, everything was confusing until now… You began to understand, thanks to Wooyoung and Yeosang. But the omega part was… still so fucking complicated. Every time you thought about a way to tell, at least, just one of them, you saw your mother’s face again when she knew the truth. You could hear the disgust in her voice again. The fear of experiencing it again paralyzed you to do anything with them.
You heard your stomach growling and you sighed. A bowl of ramyeon first. Yeah, you needed to eat.
°°°
And third, I’m an omega and they don’t know anything about that, things could change between us and I don’t want it.
Jungkook froze in front of your bedroom, his fist still on the door, ready to knock. He just wanted to show you something on his phone when he heard the end of your sentence.
He blinked quickly, and lean his head, confused.
“Noona… is an omega…?”
“What… did you say, Jungkook?”
He gasped when he heard Yoongi’s voice behind him. Seeing the confused look on his younger’s face, Yoongi realized that he, too, had just learned this information.
“Wait hyung, maybe I misunderstood…” Jungkook whispered, walking to him, “But I think I heard…”
“I think we need an emergency pack meeting, Bunny, and now.”
#aly's writing#whalyrae#Dance with me#bts#dwm#bts au#bts soulmate#bts soulmate au#bts polyamory#bts poly#bts poly!au#bts poly!#bts poly au#bts x reader#poly!bts x reader#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#bts ff#bts x yn#omegaverse#bts omegaverse au#bts as alphas#y/n as an omega#x y/n#x reader#slight ateez as y/n's besties
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abusing dad gee and nonconning him:(((
anon... you get me. you get me the most. erm i physically can't write anything right neow so this is more of a rant like if you agree
tw bye i don't even know what to tag this as it's just DEAD DOVE so if you're sensitive to this kinda crap DON'T READ!! additional: non-con & incest
★ whenever you throw a tantrum or something like screaming at him and saying mean things HE JUST TAKES IT because he doesn't want your mood to get worse so he settles on suppressing his tears and taking all your bad energy with him 😭 YALL I LOVE PATHETIC MEN I CANTTT
★ imagine forcing him to do gross things he doesn't want to do, but at the same time he'd do anything for you :( and he's so gullible and the biggest push over in the world he can't say no to you he can't handle you being mad at him
★ touching him inappropriately. (i think I've sent this b4 in someones ask box) BFF. touching him inappropriately. teasing him and watching him try to hide his dad boner jus' for the fun of it because you think he looks silly, and he does.
★ I NEVER SENT THIS ASK UNFORTUNATELY. but i wrote something about somehow being able to insert yourself with gerard and his band mate's "catching up dinner", gee makes you promise that you will behave at the restaurant because he'll be with his friends and brother and he wants to focus on catching up with them after years of not being able to. obviously, you say yes. of course, you don't mean it.
wrote this back at march dunno if i will ever ever finish it
BYE OK IK THERE'S GRAMMAR ERRORS I HAVEN'T EDITED YET AND PUT IT THRU GRAMMARLY OK
#gerard way x reader#gerard way smut#all2angels#mcr x reader#mcr smut#gerard way#my chemical romance x reader#2019 gerard way
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☥ Bunny meat (William Afton x fem!reader x Michael Afton)
Summary: He was a likeable middle-aged man who had wonderful children, his dream job and a beautiful wife. He never blamed himself for his own actions, or to be more exact, he never thought about their consequences.
tags: darkfic, unhealthy relationship, angst, smut with plot, p in v, dubcon, oral sex, rough and gentle sex, daddy kink, blood play, knife play, fear play, hurt/comfort, violence, gore/murders, child abuse, follows fnaf lore, moral and physical abuse, virginity kink, anxiety disorder, age gap, daddy issues, unreliable narrator, hallucinations, hidden pairing, William is sick, psychopathy, unhealthy narcissism
Chapter 5. Desire
Surprisingly, Wiliam behaved restrained, but inside him everything was on fire, he wanted to take you here and now, harshly and rudely, do things with you what he had long dreamed of all this time, but he knew perfectly well that if he snapped now, you'd be even more scared, cut with him all connections and will avoid him, and maybe even do something to yourself, because you're nothing but a little frightened lamb. A little creature who grew up alone, not needed by anyone, who didn't receive the proper amount of love and attention from her father. And that's why Afton thought he was the perfect source of all these feelings for you.
Perhaps, to some extent, he felt sorry you. However, his mind ignored such thoughts.
“William,” you spoke to him. “Is there no one at home?”
“Yes, Clara with kids left, I don't know where. She said she wouldn't be back until the morning.”
…
The Afton house is still same as it was before. Only coffee machine bought by the father of the family has changed. Although he earned a lot of money, little of it went to home improvement, Afton always invested only in the pizzeria, trying to make it as visible and attractive as possible.
It was also impossible to ignore the couch that was in the living room of the house. For you as a child, it was the most favourite object in Afton's house, you sat on it with Michael in the evenings and watched cartoons. When you had sleepovers with other kids, you hid under the covers because of Michael's scary stories. You often fell asleep on it late at night, without waiting for your mom, although she promised that she'd pick you up from the guests, but sometimes she never showed up because of scandals with her husband.
This couch evoked hundreds of emotions and nice memories.
But now, one more thing will be added to all these early memories: the way you lie on this couch under man who you saw as father, no matter how strange it sounds.
“You're so… beautiful,” he hovered over your body, his eyes running over it. “such delicate skin, like an angel's.” he took your hand, interlacing your fingers, kissing them. All thoughts in your head gathered into one big ball, you tried to analyze the situation somehow, but useless, because of his actions, you felt lost. William breathed out your name and greedily pressed his lips to your neck, showering it with light kisses.
You closed your eyes and turned your head to the side to give him more space, trying to relax, it seems you were succeeding. But unexpectedly for you, you felt him bite your neck.
“Oh!” bursted out of you, your free hand burrowed into his hair, trying to pull him away. “William, it hurts…” he looked up at you.
“I’m so sorry, bunny,” he smiled warmly at you. “I’ll be gentle.” he moved closer, gently kissing you on the corner of your lips. You leaned forward, hoping that this innocent kiss would turn into something more, however, Afton had other plans, he grinned and straightened up. “So impatient.”
He unbuttoned first three buttons of his purple shirt, which was enough for you to see the strange scars covering his body. You couldn't help, interest took over and your hands tentatively touched the bare area of his body.
“Where are they from?” you asked softly, causing him to chuckle again.
“It doesn't matter now, sweetheart.” he loosened the belt of his pants, after which he kissed your neck again, this time he kept his promise: you felt his tongue licking little wound he made. William took you by the hips, moving your body closer to him. “Y/n, you want this, don't you?”
“I… uh, I don't know.”
There is silence in response. William could tease you and your body for hours, nibbling and kissing it, making you sigh languidly, but this night he wanted to satisfy you first. He wanted to make you dependent on him, so that you couldn't live a day without his touch, so that you took the initiative yourself, so that you were head over heels in love. Corrupt you. However, he didn't know you were already so dependent on him, you want him to love you like in fairy tales about princesses, you want him to give you all the love that you were deprived of as a child. You just wanted someone to save you from loneliness.
You felt something hard pressing against the inside of your thigh, but you didn't want to look at what it was because of your wild embarrassment. Afton took something out of his pants pockets.
“Here, I see you need it,” you saw him holding out his hand to you with some kind of strange round pill. Confused, you looked at him, waiting for some explanation. William only laughed and ran his finger over your lips, opening them. “Yeah, and here it is, good girl.” he said, pushing the pill deeper until, due to the urge to vomit, you grabbed his wrist. “I'm sorry, baby, I just don't have anything to wash down the pill with.”
“What is it?” you winced at the unpleasant taste.
“Tranquilizers so you don't get nervous. Actually, they're mine, but I can tell by the look on your face they'll be useful for you too.” his hands carefully, as if afraid to scare you even more, undid the clasp of the dress, lowering it from your shoulders down. Unable to contain your shyness, you tried to hold the fabric on your body until William looked at you, as if mentally saying “don't.” Then your grip loosened, there was nothing you could do but obey. “that's it, good girl.”
When he wanted to take off the dress completely, you still grabbed on it, not letting it slide off your hips.
“Princess, if you keep doing this, then we won't succeed.” William looked into your eyes, putting your hands behind your head. “I won't hurt you.”
You nodded, trying to lose yourself in your feelings again. It seemed to be easier with the help of a sedative. You didn't even notice how you were only in your underwear in front of him.
“Damn, you're incredible.” he threw the dress somewhere on the floor, kissing you on the cheek while his hands caressed your hips and waist. You bit your lip to stifle a groan. Fuck, no one has ever touched you like that, especially in places like this, and when William ran his hand along the inside of your thigh, inadvertently touching your crotch, you arched your back. “it felt good, didn't it?”
William repeated the movement, but now paying more attention to your clothed pussy. The excitement took over, forcing you to move your hips towards his movements. A shudder of desire went through your whole body, Afton saw it perfectly, he kissed your collarbone, going lower to your breasts.
“Fuck, you have no idea how long I've been dreaming about this.” those words echoed in your head, but you didn't pay attention to it. “Honey, you're just so beautiful.” William ran his hands over your breasts, pinching your nipples hard with excitement.
“William…” you got the courage. He looked at you questioningly, damn, you hoped you said it so quietly that it would go unnoticed. “kiss me, please.”
He laughed. In a moment, his lips are on yours, like a predator. At that moment, you forgot absolutely everything, giving yourself completely to him. You moaned into his mouth, feeling his long fingers touching your pussy through your soaked panties. With one imperious movement, he pulls off the last piece of clothing, leaving you completely naked in front of him.
“And now? Not so scary anymore?”
“I don't know what i feel…” you were in turmoil, all fears and thoughts disappeared, a wild desire came to replace, no, not of intimacy, not of sex. But his affectionate words and compliments, the way he touches you, his gentle kisses and hugs, the way he treats you.
His fingers gently touch your labia, slowly and smoothly they move in circular movements along clit, getting another moan from you. With his other hand, he holds your legs, preventing you from moving away and closing them.
“And now, honey?”
“It's weird, but…” you avoided his gaze. ”feels good…” you answered unsure. Smiling contentedly, he removed his fingers. You noticed that as soon as his hands left your body, his movements in relation to himself instantly changed: he roughly, jerkily took off his belt and unbuttoned the fly of his pants, pulling them down. It’s like he was controlling himself when touching you.
“Lick them.” Afton said in a commanding tone, running his fingers over your lips. It was terribly embarrassing for you, but you did as he said anyway. You watched his actions with a note of sweet and naive excitement, the way his fingers penetrated deeper and deeper, pressing on your tongue, again caused unpleasant sensations to vomit. “Sorry, but there's no other way, I don't have any lube.”
When he pulled his fingers out of your mouth, quite considering how wet they were, you felt uncomfortable, but probably if you tell him about it, he's unlikely to listen and stop. The only thing left to do was to lie under him like a doll and enjoy.
“You're an obedient girl, aren't you?” his fingers went back to your glistening pussy, caressing your needy clit. Your breathing stopped instantly.
“Yes…” you whimpered when you felt his fingers, wet with your own saliva and grease, smoothly, insanely slowly entering you. William is building up the pace, not too fast, but enough to make soft sweet moans come out of your mouth. “Daddy…” you drawled languidly, feeling your soft walls tighten around his long fingers.
“Yes, princess?” Afton kisses your neck while his free hand wraps around his cock that was already out of his trousers, hard and dripping with precum. “Tell daddy what you want.”
“Please, want more…” you whispered in his ear, this time trying to be as seductive and sexy as possible. William found it funny.
“You'll get more, baby,” his breath tickled your skin. “Daddy will make you feel good.” Afton pulled out his fingers, causing you to moan in disappointment, oh, how he enjoyed it, it felt like he was ready to cum just from your angelic voice.
William tilted his head, being between your legs. The whole picture made you dizzy, you glance at him in surprise, trying to predict what will happen next. William grins, seeing how your curiosity plays tricks on you when he gives your clit a tender kiss.
“Ohhh, daddy,” this word is so vulgar, it sounds completely indecent on your tongue, but right now you don't care, all that matters is William Afton and the wild need to be needed by someone, loved, appreciated. “Yeah…”
The release builds up with an unfamiliar, wildly pleasant feeling in the lower stomach, making you want to close your legs, but his hands continued to hold them apart. His tongue feels too good, slowly moving in circular movements over your cunt, paying more attention to your clit while two fingers slowly and smoothly fucks you, forcing you to switch from moans to sobs and soft screams.
William accelerates, his movements getting faster and rougher, but no less passionate, making you arch from pleasure. With one hand buried in his dark brown hair, you try to set the pace, but he can do fine without you, so it's useless, he's much more experienced. He explored you with his tongue until the trembling left your supple body. William could feel your walls clenching around his fingers. His free hand continued to jerk himself off with increasing movements, while he was eating you out.
You sighed desperately when Afton stopped stimulating you with his tongue, lifting his head and looking at your reaction, his fingers still inside.
“Do you want to cum for daddy?” he asks, you just nod quickly, wishing of putting an end to these sweet torments that drive you crazy. “No, I need you to say it, honey.”
“Yes, yes, yesss,” you say brokenly. “I…” an uncertain pause. “I want to cum, daddy, please!” oh, it was so humiliating, but what was more terrible that you liked it.
“Good girl.” William increased the intensity of his movements, hitting all right sweet spots of yours. You moaned loudly, feeling everything tense in your lower abdomen, which means an imminent orgasm. “do it, cum while I fuck your little pussy with my fingers.” William growled, his hand that was touching his own cock stopped, now squeezing your neck, pressing on the carotid artery, but hearing your wheezing, he his grip loosens.
Your moans, which are more like crying, turn into loud, piercing “oohs”, your head's spinning, your brain's melting, everything is like in a fog, you can't even see Afton's face. The long-awaited release is catching up with you. You cum, you cum so hard that you feel ecstasy running through your whole body, you feel that your breathing becomes ragged, and your pussy clenching on his fingers.
“Such a good girl,” because of orgasm, you don't even hear what he says, and you don't want to, you need time to regain your strength. “it's my turn now, baby.”
He takes his fingers out, brings them to his mouth and licks them, studying your reaction. William touches his member again, his heartbeat quickens, his eyes now closed, apparently he's thinking about something. Yes, he's definitely imagining something in his head.
“Tell me, do you love daddy?“ he asked, his voice hoarse from excitement. He isn't even looking at you.
“Yes,” you responses quietly. Taking advantage of the moment, you look at him in detail while he doesn't notice. Damn, how handsome he was, his long, such aristocratic fingers that played with the tip of his cock, rubbing cum along entire length, his slightly disheveled but insanely beautiful brown hair like milk chocolate, his sharp cheekbones, it was stupid to deny that he was unattractive. “I love daddy, I love you, William.” you didn't even fully understand what you were talking about. You was just saying what he wanted to hear.
He pumps his cock faster, you see how he shuddered, like saying your name or something else, you can't understand. But you catch yourself thinking that it's damn beautiful. If your mom found out what you were doing, she probably wouldn't be happy.
He cums on your stomach, with a loud groan, and then, breathing heavily, falls on the couch next to you, staring blankly at the ceiling. What is he thinking about? Is he even thinking now? You're lying obediently by his side, trying to figure out what just happened, but your brain doesn't want to think, your head is aching, your temples are throbbing. William turns to you, then looks at the crumpled dress on the floor, then back at you.
“Let's go to the shower, bunny, I'll help you wash up.”
…
The next morning came for you only closer to 12, when you were suddenly woken up by the sound of the door opening. It was Clara with Michael and Elizabeth. Confused, not even realizing that you were in their house, you jumped up from the couch.
“Michael, give Elizabeth that hoodie, you're not wearing it anyway.” woman's voice was heard somewhere in the hallway area, which means that she was nearby.
“Mom, these are my things, and just because I don't wear them doesn't mean that—”
Michael entered living room, but when he saw you, he froze in place.
“Y/n? What are you doing here?” he asked, a slight smile appearing on his face.
“Who are you talking to?” Clara’s voice sounded, but as soon as she appeared in the room, her emotions immediately changed. “Oh, hello, honey.” woman affectionately called your name, coming up to you and sitting down on the sofa. “Elizabeth, go say hello to Y/n!”
Girl immediately rushed over, you noticed a plush toy in her hands, it seems it was the same robot girl drawing of which Elizabeth recently showed you. She greeted you cheerfully, all you could do was say an awkward “hello” in response, still trying to remember how you even ended up here. Clara stroked your head, her gaze fixed on your face, on your tousled hair and lost expression. You knew that you had to say something in your own defense, why you were here.
“Sorry for such an oversight, I had some problems with my mom, and Mr. Afton told me to spend the night here.” you lied, and then mentally slapped yourself. Damn, this is so dumb. The Afton family knew that you had the best relationship with your mom and that you had never argued. You doubted how truth your words sounded, but judging by Clara's reaction, everyone believed you.
“Honey, I'm glad that you have somewhere to go, you know that we'll always welcome you with hugs,” she said tenderly, with maternal love. “You must be hungry. I'll go to the store and cook breakfast, what do you think?”
There was no point in lying further, you really needed something to eat, so you silently agreed.
Mrs. Afton went to the nearest grocery store, taking Elizabeth with her. You and Michael were left alone, you gradually began to remember what happened, and with the realization that you and Afton had something, you were overtaken by a sickening anxiety, causing your toes and hands to go numb and shake, and your heart to beat faster. You two were sitting on this damn couch watching TV, however, neither of you was interested in what the old screen was showing. You were sitting hugging your knees, wondering whose clothes you were wearing: they were of a child surely, with some kind of cartoon print, a t-shirt and, as it seems, Michael's pants. He didn't hesitate to look at you from head to toe, which slightly annoyed you.
“Michael, stop staring.” You hissed, tucking your face into your lap.
“I'm just trying to figure out,” he paused, thinking about something. “why are you wearing my dead brother's t-shirt?”
“What?”
“Well… I'm not accusing you of anything… it's just…” he scratched his head, clearly not knowing what to say to you. ”Okay, forget it. It's just my shit in my head.”
“Michael, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…” you looked at him. Why did William choose his dead son's clothes out of all? “There must be some kind of misunderstanding.”
“It's nothing, y/n, you shouldn't worry so much about it.”
You looked at the TV, trying to come up with some kind of ridiculous excuse, but in vain. And how long can you lie?
“Speaking of my brother… today, Elizabeth, mom and I went to his grave.” Michael muttered, you knew perfectly well that this topic of conversation wasn't the best, because the he blamed himself enough for what happened. You decided that the best thing you can do now is just listen to him. “You know… it's already overgrown with grass. We had to work hard to get the grave back to normal. Oh, and there's also a lot of webs.”
You knew that only people who cared for Evan's gravestone were Clara and Michael. William, after his son's death, never visited grave, and even more so, didn't attend the funeral, citing the fact that he had a lot of work. And when Evan was in a coma, with minimal chance of survival, Michael came to him almost every day, crying and begging for forgiveness.
You knew that Michael was just a traumatized guy and it was useless to blame him for all this, he had already heard a lot about himself from his father, so you just moved closer to him when you noticed him dropping tears on the couch and hugged him.
Half an hour later, Mrs. Afton returned from the store. Michael wasn't in such good mood as before, but as soon as his mother crossed the threshold of their house, he seemed to put on a mask of happiness, meeting her and helping to carry bags into the kitchen.
For breakfast, which smoothly turned into lunch, Clara served macaroni and cheese and caesar salad. Your stomach, which hasn't received normal hot food for a long time, rejoiced and you ate all two portions in a few minutes. Elizabeth talked most of all at the table, telling you something about robots and toys again. Yes, once upon a time Michael, and Clara herself, told you that she took after her father. She's also interested in mechanics and loves animatronics.
Looking at this whole family, you felt guilty about yesterday. Probably, to some extent, you even hated yourself. Mrs. Afton, the nicest woman you've ever known, after your mom, of course. Michael is a devoted and faithful friend, as well as a caring brother, Elizabeth is just the sunshine of this family, cheerful, everyone's favorite. And William is a charming and likeable man who was ready to do anything for his family and work. At least that's how the family seemed to you in your head.
You're lost in your own thoughts, stopped listening to Elizabeth's babble. The damn guilt was eating you, making you sick of yourself. How could you do that? How dare you drag a married man, the head of the family, into bed, and then sit at the same table with his family, smiling innocently at everyone. What the fuck is wrong with you? Mrs. Afton will definitely find out, Michael will find out and Elizabeth will find out, and then you will become a disgrace to the whole town. You will become known as a little slut who seduced a married man. Not just a man, but William Afton himself.
“By the way, honey, did William tell you where he is?” Clara asked, and you squinted, trying to remember what Afton had told you before you dozed off.
“He said he was going to the pizzeria to work.” you said, it was true. Clara's face changed.
“What?” a rhetorical question. “he never worked on that day, he always had a day off exactly… today.”
Meanwhile, William was already at the pizzeria.
#william afton smut#fnaf x reader#steve raglan x reader#fnaf x y/n#william afton x reader#william afton#steve raglan smut#dilf william#fnaf smut#fnaf william afton#william afton imagines#william afton x reader smut#Fnaf movie
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𝗦𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗘 𝗛𝗢𝗨𝗦𝗘
Masterlist
𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐃: Yes || No
Pairings: Tails x Reader
They/them // She/her // He/him // Other
Summery; Our gang went to a haunted house to celebrate Sonic's birthday. The thing is... nothing went as planned...
A/n: Does anyone want to be in the tag list?
Warnings: cursing, blood, abuse, kidnapping, possessive behavior, manipulation, deception, derealization, guilt tripping, scopophobia, etc.
Word Count: 2878
Have Fun!
"Y/n, Are you really sure about this?" Tails asked hesitantly.
You proudly posed outside of the ruined palace, "Of course! Last year we went on a train to play murder mystery for Amy. Now this year for famous blue blur's birthday.... we are going in a haunted house~ Don't worry guys this is not a real haunted house just a play that I pay to someone..."
Everyone glanced at each other.
You approached your friends confidently, "I sent a message to Sonic, telling him to come here urgently. So we need to be quick. Everyone go and find a place for yourselfs, hide and be scared. We will be the one to hunt Sonic down! Let's go!"
Espio stopped you unsure, "Wait. There is no rule or anything in this?"
You glance at him, "Just don't kill anyone."
Espio raised a brow, unamused that you mention the last party he poisoned Sonic because of his disability understanding the whole point.
Silver gasped, "Wait, you guys played murder mystery on Amy's birthday? Oh no, I missed a lot!"
Blaze patted his back, "Don't worry this year you are with us this time."
Amy smiled at him, "It's okay. We knew you were unable to! Right now let's focus on having fun!"
"Yeah!" You cheered, "This is the spirit!"
Vector stopped everyone before we could get in, "Wait, if the only rule is not killing anyone out of fear or... other reasons... what if some people end up in the same place or some of us get lost alone in this palace what we gonna do?"
Tails popped in, "We could call each other or message."
Rouge sighed, "Good idea genius. There is no signal here, remember? This place is really a good idea to drag us all the way here with no internet whatsoever, thanks Y/n."
"You're welcome. My idea is that we can all get in groups and split up. Easy. Right? One group guards one place another. How's that sound?"
Vector pipped in once again, "I am writing everyone's name in a paper!"
Shadow sighed, "This is going to take forever, let's just split up. Me and Rouge can go to the top floor. Vector and Espio can go downstairs. Silver and Blaze could be on the fourth floor. Amy and Knuckles could be on the third floor. Y/n and Tails could be on the second floor."
Knuckled shrugged, "That was in fact faster."
"Sorry Vector."
"Aww man..."
You waited for everyone to go in, glancing towards the horizon. With a hope maybe you would get a glance of the blue line.
Tails grabbed your arm, "Let's go to our place before he comes."
You nodded and followed him in.
You escort after Amy and Knuckles. Glancing at the old wooden stairs, carefully stepping along the creaking steps as you listen to others cheat. You reached out to hold the railing only to halt. They're really dusty... It needs to be a haunted house after all. They're doing a really good job here.
Instead you continue climbing until you and Tails reach the second floor. Where you probably first scare Sonic without him knowing it was you guys.
You bid your goodbyes with others and disappeared into the hall out of their sight.
"Whoa, look at this place! Where do you think we should hide?" You nudge his side with a grin as you observe the pictures hanging on the walls.
He hums glancing around, "Let's first start searching from the first door. I am sure we can find something to scare Sonic even more too."
You followed him along to the first door you two were next to. Tails reach for the door knob and open the door with a loud creak.
You two walked inside as your steps heard loudly in the room.
There wasn't much in this room. Just a few covered stuff and a few boxes on a table.
Tails approached the boxes and searched inside them while you removed the cover of the seat.
"Weird."
You glance at him, "What's up?"
"There are a lot of tools here."
"Maybe this room used to be a repair room or something?"
"It could be-- What are you doing?"
You grin under the white sheet, "What? Scared?"
"If you are thinking of scaring Sonic like that... try a bit harder." He shuffled away from you as you took it off, throwing it on the old couch.
"But I sensed some fear from youuu~ Your tails are stiff-- Wait, what are you holding?"
"You are funny, and what do you mean-- oh..."
You snickered, "You really lose yourself when you are near tools, don't you?"
"I swear I don't even remember picking this up." He laughed and put the wrench back in the box, "Let's go."
You two left the room and walked further in the hall, opening some doors and glancing inside searching for something useful.
As you heard a loud thud from behind, in the hall you glanced back, guessing it was Tails who made the noise but seeing he also turned around and glanced back, you freezed in quick fright.
"What was that?"
He turned to you shrugging, "Maybe the wrench dropped out of the tool box because I left it unbalanced?"
You sighed, repeating in your head. This is not a horror movie and you two are not characters in a book. This is just a silly game and this place isn't haunted. Ghosts aren't real.
"Maybe it was others?"
"Wouldn't we hear the creak of wood under their feet first? Besides, why would they come to our floor? We all parted on an agreement basis. You're just thinking too much into this, don't let your imagination take over, it's the wrench falling off."
"You are not making me feel any better right now Tails." You spoke in a paranoid way.
Seeing your tensed body he sighed and reached his hand with a smile, "If it's gonna make you feel any better wanna check that room again?"
You nodded quickly, taking his warm hand into your cold one. It would make you feel more at ease. But he must be right. You are just making yourself scared for nothing.
You two walked back down the corridor, to the first door while you were scolding yourself for being such a kid.
Tails opened the door with a relieved smile, "See? Just the wrench."
You glanced around the room. Everything looked just the same as you left it. The wrench was on the ground.
"Yeah..." you frowned.
"But how? I am sure you put it inside where it can't easily just drop down like that. There isn't even any window here that can make wind too."
"Maybe you just didn't pay that much attention." Tails walked inside the room and picked it up. This time carefully leaving it inside the box.
"There, our problem solved. Don't scare yourself alright? Let's continue searching. It's just gravity."
You sighed following him out of the room. You feel childish once again, tricking yourself into believing in something nonexisting....
"Yeah, listen to the logic and that is you. Mr. Fox."
You two laugh at that. Now you are once again at ease.
Tails paused, "When I think twice...." He let your hand go and rush into the room again.
He came back with the wrench, "Just to be sure. This can stay with us. You can't be sure what could be useful in any situation."
You rolled your eyes at his reasoning, "Sure. Stop being so cliche."
"This is me." He hummed a song as he opened another door in the hall you two were never in before.
He walked in, "Try to touch everything as little as possible so that anyone who enters the room will notice the impression that the place has not been stepped in for years."
"I'll try." This room too was dark like the last ones. You couldn't turn on the light because there was no electricity in the house, and some rooms were darker because there was no window inside either, so you left the doors open when you entered. You guys entered the palace close to sunset so you guys have very little timed sunlight and getting darker and darker every minute.
Tails walked inside the room further as he had better sight vision then you had while you waited next to the door, "Oh, I find a flashlight! And it is charged too! It can take us for a few hours. This will definitely be enough for us in the meantime! This is definitely gonna be a lot useful. Wish you told us we were coming here so I could bring more useful things from my workshop but what we find here will do fine too I guess." Tails talked to himself.
You glance outside the room, observing the paintings. The eyes felt like staring into your very soul. It's just a fascinating illusion artists make...
Hearing a shuffle behind, you quickly turned around, glancing around in the corridor, a little panicked and confused.
When a bright light came to your face, you yelped and covered your face.
"Whoa, Sorry. Didn't expect this think can work like that. It looks really old too!" He spoke fascinatedly as he turned the light away from your face.
You blinked your eyes with a groan, "Did you find anything useful then that light there?"
"Nothing. Let's look to the next door."
You glanced back one more time as he went further in the now half illuminated hall, "Okay..."
Now the sunlight's effects are nearly gone, our only light source was the flashlight.
"I hope others find something to lighten their way too." You muttered to yourself, "I can't imagine how it could be without light in here..."
"I am sure they find something." Tails reached for the door and opened it.
After you stepped in you two heard a noise.
Tails glanced at you as you two freezed to listen more closely. It was mostly silent but...
Tails' ear twitched, "Static."
"It's not coming from this room."
You screamed with an explosion sound and the light turned off.
"Crap. Amoul exploded."
You grabbed your chest with a heavy breath.
"Gotta find a new Amoul. We still can use the flashlight. It still has a lot of power."
"Why are you so calm?! The Amoul just exploded out of nowhere!"
"That's not true. It was old and getting hot. It's normal."
"Then at least you should have warned me..."
You looked towards where you assumed he was, a bit annoyed.
"Sorry, you are right. I should have told you." He grabbed your hand, noticing your lack of vision.
You softened, "Let's just find one. And get going already. Sonic must be already here and we haven't figured out what we should do."
He dragged you outside, "I think I saw one in the rooms."
"That's good to hear...."
You waited outside the hall as he searched in the rooms for an amoul.
You glanced at the end of the hall; it wasn't far away. You looked back at the room Tails went to.
"Hey, you continue checking these rooms. I am gonna go see if there is anything useful in the other ones we haven't been to yet."
His voice became a bit muffled, "Don't get lost."
"Haha funny. As if I could get lost on this floor. There is nothing but this suffocating hall." You muttered to yourself.
You quickly walked down the dark hall.
Coming to a halt at the end of it, you squint your eyes noticing there was no door but two more ways to continue the corridor on its right and left walls.
"Oh my god more places to get lost..."
You shuddered a chill running down your spine as you glanced back, suddenly the paintings are more dark for you.
You wanted to run back with the sudden chill but you turned back at the new corridors. You swallowed and stepped in towards the right one.
A light illuminated your figure, "Wow, you find more hallways! Let's search!" His eyes shined with curiosity.
You started his back as he walked in front of you.
You gasped quickly following him before losing the sight of his light.
You walked next to him observing the paintings on the walls.
"There aren't any doors here."
"There is one in the end." He pointed it out with his light.
You two came to the end of the hallway, he reached for the door.
"It's not opening." He tried a few more times, "This one is locked from the inside... weird."
"Maybe it's just stuck?"
He tried to open it with some force, hitting it with his shoulder.
"Nope and don't be fooled by how old it looks, it's really strong." He rubs his shoulder.
You huffed, "Man, what a waste of time."
"At least there are a few windows here. Look, it's already night."
"Yeah..." you glanced at the dark starry night. Moon's light was shining directly towards your figures.
Tails smiles at you, "Let's search the other hallway and hide in there."
You agreed to follow him. Until you halted noticing a mirror next to the door. You stare at your blurry reflection.
"You coming?"
"Yep."
When you got to the end of the exit along with Tails, you halted next to him, staring. Instead of an exit, there was a door blocking your ways.
"This is very strange. Did we go the wrong way?" Tails frowned, illuminating the other way.
He let out a gasp, "What the--"
You turn around to stare at what he was looking at. Your eyes widen. The hallway you two just walked down wasn't the same anymore. No windows, no paintings, no moon light, just darkness.
Your breathing quickened, "Okay.... Do you still think paranormal activities don't exist now?"
He swallowed, slowly turning towards the door, "Which one? Walking back down the darkness or the unknown door?"
You looked back at the darkness but quickly reached for the door and opened it, "The Door. Definitely the door." Tails quickly followed along as you shut the door back down.
The light flickered and you two freezed.
"No, no, no. You can't do this to us right now!" He groaned as he tried to fix it.
You halted glancing around, "Tails."
He hummed for an answer.
"Where are we?"
He looked up along with illuminating the room for you two.
"Dining room? What is this smell?" He groaned in disgust, closing his nose.
"Rotten, rust, dust and moisture...?"
"I just don't understand. How did we end up here?"
You steal his flashlight, "Stop trying to make sense in the ghost's life. This room is huge... and disgusting. Let's just find a way out."
"This place isn't haunted, Y/n. It must be because we accidentally opened a secret room." You two split up around the long table. It was donated with plates, forks, knives, spoons and old candles. In plates there were weird solid objects that you don't wanna pay much attention to.
You sighed, "Why would a dining room be a secret place? And why does it smell like shit?" You lighten up the walls, searching for a door.
"That is.... something I don't wanna tire my mind with..."
"Then tire your mind with finding another door!"
"I'm tryin' "
You two searched the whole room but found nothing.
"...maybe if we went back from the same door our hall would appear again?"
"It could work but.... where is our door?"
You illuminate the area where the door was.
"O-okay.... we are stuck in this smelly room. Do you wanna explain this with math and science too genius boy?"
"I threw math out of the window a long time ago."
"Great. How are we going to go back home then?"
Before he can say anything all the candles light up all of a sudden and your light flickered off.
You two screamed in terror.
On the table's biggest plate there was a fresh corpse of an animal, you could see the flys fluttering just above it.
Your hands were shaking so hard, you wanted to puke so much, you quickly covered your mouth.
You screamed when you heard a thud. You looked towards Tails, he was on the ground, choking.
"Tails!"
You quickly sprint towards him.
"Are you alright?!"
He nodded quickly, he was holding his nose. He swallowed and tried to slowly breathe from his mouth.
You tried to ignore what you just saw and caressed his back.
"It's okay... breath... calm down..."
A few tears slipped from his face, "Damn it... what was that...?" He gritted his teeth.
You didn't answer.
You heard a ear scratcher scream. You two closed your ears in pain. It was like no matter what you do that voice seem to went straight to your head, ripping your inside.
You two cried for it to stop and all of a sudden.... it was all quite.
Until...
You heard an echo.
"Isn't that in the nature of a fox? To eat the rabbits, rodents and birds? Won't you come and join the dinner with us little fox? On today's menu we have carrion!" It started to chuckle while its laugh slowly grew with a menacing tone. You glared at the ceiling.
What the fuck is this?
Tails bared his fangs with a whimper, tears slipping from his tightly closed eyes, he clawed his ears don't wanna hear, his tails swarming his shaking up body. You try to comfort him with your shaking hands.
"What's wrong little fox? It's just meat~"
You couldn't stay still when your anger outweighed your fear, "I don't know what or who you are but you can't play with us like that!!! Let us out RIGHT NOW!"
"Oh but we just have begun..."
#sonic the hedgehog#miles tails prower#tails the fox#sonic characters#sonic and tails#knuckles the echidna#sonic and knuckles#sonic#tails#knuckles#shadow#shadow x reader#knuckles x reader#espio#allenwrites#silver#silver x reader#x reader
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sometimes i want to get back to writing long fics, but then i remember i have mouths to feed (yes, you). anyways, i was talking about the viktors in my last post's tags and i wanted to elaborate on that.
okay, when i say rookwood is husband material, i never said he was good husband material. while the reason you relationship would work is because of small moments that are really sweet. you may think he's changed, but he'll act like it never happened right afterwards.
the way you meet is probably the most tragic part of it all and sets the tone of the rest of your abusive relationship. so, you happened to be a halfbreed (wizard x smth, most likely veela or siren) that he planned on selling but decided to keep for himself. alternatively, you could have been trying to protect some animals from poachers but he still took the animal and you. he's a greedy scoundrel.
he won't hurt you, per se, but he will trophy wife the life out of you. personally i wouldn't mind that, but i could see why many people would. this isn't your average trophy wife, this is something else. he brings you everywhere in a "buy animals or materials from me and you might bag yourself a beauty like this one" kinda way. at the same time, you would not be the beauty the customers bag because your his, gout a brand and all. mhm, he 100% puts his name on you somewhere.
now, you may be confused. that isn't husband like at all, and i agree. we need to look into the finer details here, my dears. in letters, on the rare occasion he doesn't bring you along as some marketing ploy, he writes your name like it is that of a saint's. you can see in each pen stroke, it is some of the most gentle movements your lover has ever made. after long days of hard work, yelling at his workers and standing around as they do all the work, he finally has time to think about you as he winds down.
he holds you all the same as well. like a creature he want's to be gentle with but has no clue how, so as a result he just watches from afar. you have your own room and he has his, objectively yours is just nicer, and you have people waiting on your every need and want. he won't bother you or talk to you the longer you are together, aside from times you'd bump into each other in his manor or stand face to face with only a bookshelf between you.
someone very similar is another viktor, viktor krum. now he is not abusive unlike someone we know, he's definitely a watcher as well. he shows his care and love with his eyes, and sure there's more as well.
now not entirely unlike rookwood, he will drown you in expensive things. look at him, he's been a professional quidditch player since before he even became an adult, he's a wealthy guy; by ethical means, i might add. he doesn't only lavish you in clothes or jewelry, but whatever hobby or career it is you have. you like astronomy? have a planetarium! you're a writer? have the entire library from beauty and the beast. your wish is his command.
which brings me to, he is so princess bride coded. if you take nothing from this post at all, take this one thing. he has a similar phrase to "as you wish" that he says whenever you tell him something, while it may seem like a "whatever, i'll just do what you say to get it over with" response, he actually means to say "i love you" each time he says it. it is rare that he goes out of his way to speak, even rarer that he outright says he loves you, but in his eyes and actions you know he means it.
krum is actually very smart loves, think about it. if you want to go on about a certain topic, he'll keep up just fine. for starter's, he's read the books he's seen you read in case you want to talk about it, also he's just a naturally intelligent guy. it's how he could keep up his grades and quidditch, a lot of things he just knows.
pause, he does that thing where he'd very, very gently bounce his leg while you're sitting on his lap and telling him something. vodka in one hand and a look in his eyes that one would have when look at their entire world. oh my, hand placement on the waist too, not even in that kind of way but he's just o perfect.
#౨ৎ⋆ anne’s chronicles ˚。⋆#want to talk octavian next#i need my own viktor krum like a rose needs water#the fact that i could go on#harry potter x reader#hogwarts legacy x reader
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now im like curious about your shido opinions you really wrote like a WHOLE tag essay
Ok. So here's the thing.
I have this thing in my life where my favourite character from a media property is not always like... my choice. It just kind of happens to me over time while I try to scrabble away like an insect in an antlion trap. Loser ass pathetic Masayoshi Shido happened to me and every day I suffer for it (but also have a really good time).
I would say Akechi and Ren are about on par with him though so I can be spared SOME shame for my evils.
But what really makes me think about Shido is the concept of a change of heart. By nature of the game we don't really see people post change of heart, excluding Futaba. There's usually an apology scene (or in Shido's case also a scene where you watch him cry his ass off while everyone else in the room ignores him which is both mildly sad and majorly hilarious) and then they disappear from the narrative. Maybe a mention or two of how they're having a bad time.
And it makes sense! They aren't the focus of the story. They are the rotten adults and they got their comeuppance. You see them again briefly in Mementos but, like everyone else down there, they are being twisted by Yaldabaoth. You can't really say that's who they are post change of heart. It's a distortion. They essentially have another palace, in a way.
We see Futaba post change of heart, but in her case her distortion wasn't really a fundamental building block of her personality. It was the result of external pressures that made her anxiety and self-hatred intensify, but she herself did not make that distortion through her own actions. Her distortion was the result of the pain and suffering others brought her through no fault of her own, and she never externalised that suffering by making others suffer. Even her shadow's hostility is mild. Her palace is the only one where you go inside it and you're not initially seen as an enemy, after all.
The evil palace rulers, though? They cooked that stuff up all on their own. There's cut content suggesting how most of the palace rulers turned out like they were, but the difference is they were the agents of their own distortions. Even if people defended and enabled Kamoshida, for example, he wasn't made to be that way. He decided to see women as objects. He decided to act on bad impulses.
So when their hearts are changed, people whose fundamental building blocks have been knocked down like a Jenga tower, is the person who walks away from that still even the same person anymore?
In Shido's case, his pride is so enormous it swallows Tokyo. It intends to swallow the world. It is what makes up the fabric of who he is from toe to tip. Every action he takes in the story is born of that pride. Suing Ren for embarrassing him. Using and abusing Akechi. The way he treats his subordinates, treats the police, treats people who would oppose him. The world exists to serve Masayoshi Shido.
If you take something so fundamental away from a man so steeped in it, what is left afterwards? Who is that man? When you put that man in prison (and prison in Japan is nothing but godawful human rights violations, but that's another topic), are you punishing someone for the actions of a completely different person?
I like to think the answer to that last question is kind of yes.
A change of heart isn't something that can happen in the real world. People can change their own minds, but to unwillingly have the most prominent aspect of yourself stripped away is something else entirely. Men like Shido in the real world do not get better and they do not change, because they don't want to. But in fiction? Hoo boy.
Imagine one day you wake up and you don't understand the person you were yesterday. It's like you're in the body of a total stranger. How frightening is that? How could that not be a kind of deep eldritch horror? How could I not be completely insane about it?
I don't do it with any of the other palace rulers though. I don't like them. Sorry to all Okumura enjoyers or whatever.
The thing about Shido is there's a plot point in the game which is literally that no one knows anything about him (which makes sense, his popularity is a distortion). He is a one dimensional guy. A piece of wood with an angry face on it. So you can do anything with him.
Here, I'll show you.
What was his family like? Pre-change of heart he's basically just a carbon copy of his dipshit parents.
Is he actually bald or is it a choice? Choice. He went grey in his late teens and was so embarrassed he shaves that shit down shiny bald which is, honestly, way more embarrassing. Just utter loser behaviour. I have him grow it again in art I draw of him post change of heart (send an ask if you want to see that, I designed his dumb ass a persona and a metaverse outfit) purely because I hate drawing bald heads. I've failed the 'be honest about his hairline' contingent for the first time ever. I'm sorry women
What is he like post change of heart? Complicated, but does intend to do the right thing. I feel like he develops a whole nother palace because Japanese prison + basically coming into existence at 53 years old after being The Worst Person Ever is one hell of a thing.
Also I made him bisexual. No more questions at this time.
#masayoshi shido#meme friend asks#i am NOT tagging this with persona 5#i respect the community too much. do not make them behold what i have wrought#uhhhh send more asks if you want clarification or elaboration. i guess#i am autistic and i like losers. apparently.#bisexual loser masayoshi shido. lame dipshit shido masayoshi#*says this fondly*
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Hi Mia, I know I am an anonymous stranger asking you this so if you'd rather not answer feel free to delete
I wanted to ask, what was it like right after dropping out of college? What did you do afterwards?
It's no problem at all, anon! I've kinda talked about it in my tags from time to time, so it's not something I'm particularly ashamed of. (usually that is)
And, uh.... fair warning, this is gonna get kind of dark and probably a bit depressing. I do occasionally mention my experiences on here in passing, but I tend to not talk about them in depth. So... kind of a CW for talks of past child abuse (I don't go in depth but it's implied) and severe mental health issues.
So, thing is, I was kind of forced to drop out. Though it was still technically my choice. But, at the same time, I don't think I had much of a choice, if that makes sense. As a teen, I hated school, and while I was a what you would call a 'gifted kid', adored by teachers and envied by classmates, I didn't put much effort or passion into my studies. I did finish school with pretty good grades, though. Got into college. It was there when I actually started to enjoy the process of learning and education as a whole. I went from being a pretty good student to quite literally one of the best once I started actually putting in the effort to study instead of just winging it by as I did before that.
But I also started off my independent life when I was in college. It should have been a good thing. And it was a good thing. (You're gonna hear lots of contradicting statements here, and that's something I had to accept). I finally got out of the abusive environment I've spent my entire life in. But, thing is, I learned the hard way that just getting out is not enough to actually get better. Once I was out, finally safe and free to do whatever I want with no danger or restrictions, I paradoxically fell into the darkest mental space I've ever been in. Now that I'm older, I know that it's unfortunately normal for abuse survivors. But I didn't back then. I had no friends because I used to be an anxious, traumatized teenager with undiagnosed autism who had no idea how to socialize, nor did she really want to. And I never got to grow out of that, despite now being an adult, living on my own and making my own choices. Thus, came the consequences of my antisocial lifestyle up until that point. I had no one to talk to. No one to help me out with the groceries, studies, anything really. I was completely and utterly on my own, and before that, I thought that that's the way I want to be.
But I felt lost, lonely, and depressed. It got so bad that I would sometimes spend an entire day stuck in bed, not doing anything, including eating, brushing my teeth or changing clothes. Basically, depression in its clearest. Like I said, I didn't have a support system. I was on my own, and it's kind of my own fault that it got like this. Yes, I was hurt and traumatized, but I was also highly avoidant and distant from everyone, even those who genuinely had good intentions. I still deal with my avoidant attachment style up to this day, because I know it's not healthy.
I had the 'everyone will hurt me, no one will understand me, so I'm safest by myself' mentality. Don't do that. Isolating yourself like that will only make it worse. Had to learn that the hard way.
Long story short, I dropped out. I couldn't handle studying, and I needed help. I wasn't attending my classes, I had no motivation to even make myself food, much less study, and I lost all sense of hope for the future. Was I happy with my choice? No, I was heartbroken over it. I felt like a failure. I still do, honestly. Most people my age have at least one degree, some even more. They have friends and connections they've made in college. Experiences I never got to have, and probably never will, because I am not getting younger. Some have successful careers that I am amazed by. Some married and even had kids. Meanwhile, I'm still stuck figuring myself out, without much to my name. Because I never really got to grow up. It's hard not to feel like I'm missing out. But I try not to think about it.
I went into therapy, I slowly but surely have gotten better. It was a long process. I've stumbled and given up many times. Unpacking all of my trauma and how it effected me into adulthood was debilitating and painful. You have to deal with the fact that you were robbed of the chance to have a normal, happy life, and you can't do anything about it. There was some morbid comfort in thinking that 'there is something wrong with me'. It gave me a sense of control. If it's my fault I felt useless and unmotivated, then I could fix it. Even if I never actually did that. But accepting that all of this misery is actually a consequence of someone else's actions that have hurt you this deeply... it makes you feel helpless and angry. Like there is nothing you can do.
But it does get better. Doesn't get perfect. I still have bad days, and I still feel pretty lost in life, to be honest. I have no idea what I want to do. Nor do I have any plans for the future. But I do want to go to college one day. I love learning and I enjoy challenging my brain with new tasks to try and overcome. I would do that right now, if it wasn't as expensive as it is. I cannot afford higher education. I would risk it and take out a loan if I had confidence that I will be able to get a job and pay it off after getting my degree. But I don't. Because tons of folks with degrees cannot find a job for months on end, and I see how miserable it makes them. And I'd much rather have some stability in my life.
I got a job that I actually find joy in, though I don't think I'll be doing that for the rest of my life. I got a lovely circle of friends that I can rely on. I got a creative hobby there to keep me happy. It's not ideal, but I'm content with my life, and sometimes I'm even happy. I have no idea what the future will bring, but, honestly, I'd much rather focus on today and now.
I guess that's all to say that... dropping out is not always pretty and freeing. Then again, there's a difference between dropping out because you have no further intention to continue your studies, and dropping out due to circumstances out of your control. But it's not the end of the world. You stumble, you fall and you even regress, but you somehow get back up again. You find new things to do and enjoy. Life goes on. And it's still worth living for.
#mia talks#oof like i said this got pretty heavy#i always feel kind of jittery talking about this stuff because i can easily start to feel like i'm throwing a pity party or something lol#also when i say 'i had no friends' i don't mean that everyone was cruel and horrible to me#i actually did have friends#but my avoidant tendencies at that point at time pushed me to self isolate from everyone by my own volition#i had people who probably would have helped me without a second thought#but i was so deep in my self destructive mechanisms that i just didn't see that#that's another harsh truth of surviving abuse#the same defense mechanisms that kept you safe will actively self sabotage you once you're out of that environment#oh the irony
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Going with a Hannibal theme for this one 👀
001: 5 favorite ships (canon or non-canon)
002: Hannigram - Things you look for in fics
003: Beverly Katz
5 favorite ships katz and dogs - i feel like not enough people recognize how much Will clearly trusts Bev (he calls her when he finds Georgia, he asks her to look into Hannibal while he's in prison). she's the only person who seems to clock that he's Not Okay in s1 and who also tries to reach out to him on "neutral" territory (giving him shooting advice, engaging in morbid jokes, telling him to talk to her if things get to be too much). she doesn't infantilize him (Jack, Alana) or treat him as a curio (Hannibal). he's not a means to an end for her, he's a person. meanwhile Will doesn't treat her with the same rudeness he gives Zeller; again, he trusts her insights and reaches back to her. also can we all notice that he doesn't do the mirroring thing with her?? i feel like it's big when Will doesn't default to either of his masking personas (rude, aloof professor or empath who reflects you back to yourself).
will/molly - in part because i have huge affection for red dragon even as i acknowledge all the ways it's Bad. but i dislike when fandom acts like Will's entire marriage to Molly was a lie. or like Molly is either Too Badass for Will or Too Soft for him. she trusted him enough to make him part of her life, they stayed together for years, they adopted more dogs together. she speaks his language! meanwhile i think it's a rather...unfair assessment of Will to act like he's only using Molly as this clutch for normalcy. he KNOWS he's never going to be "normal," he could have closed himself off utterly after the entire Verger arc. but he found someone he could trust in Molly, which tells us a lot about her even if the show doesn't really explore her as a character. (i think their conversations in the book and the ways that Will "finds" pieces of her in the mundane aspects of his work are evidence of a loving relationship.)
abigail hobbs/freddie lounds - i haven't found, like, a fic that explores what i'd want out of this, but the gist is that Abigail gets treated as a child in a lot of ways, which i think is unfair to her. yes, she is barely a legal adult. yes, she is naive and sheltered. but also she has keen survival instincts and she recognizes the meta-level operations of Bryan Fuller's Hannibal, i.e. it's about the story that you're telling. Abigail as a ghost in the machine, Freddie as the "vessel" that gives her coherence and meaning both in relation to her dad and separate from Hannibal. they're using each other! it's toxic! but also Freddie is the only person who really treats Abigail as an adult. (plus you KNOW Abigail has some like, repressed queer feelings. she ate and honored ALL those girls she helped murder.)
will/hannibal - like. it's the arc of the show Fuller created. i have eyes.
...are there five ships i like in Hannibal? huh. i don't actually LIKE alana/margot in the Fullerverse, because it erases the butch masc aspect of book!Margot, which i think is so, so important in talking about Margot's queerness AND her abuse (she turns to bodybuilding as a means of defense, she ID's as butch and it's an intentional refusal of the girl her parents wanted her to be, as well as the "girl" she was). no one has sold me on bev/freddie yet, because Bev obviously hates Freddie and so much wlw content in the fandom tends to be "gentle soft femmes." idk. alana/will has potential but only if it's ALSO fucked up, because Will relies on Alana as a defense and Alana only ever sees Will as fundamentally broken.
things you look for in fics - hannigram it's been a second since i obsessively combed through the hannibal ao3 tag for fics. i can't do "soft" murder husbands content. i dislike fics where Hannibal gives Will positive language to define himself, because i think it's fundamentally ooc. Hannibal wants Will to be what Hannibal wants, which also happens to be a part of himself that Will actively represses (as opposed to accepting/working through/etc). their relationship is obsessive, it's manipulative, it has a body count.
unrelated to that but important to me: i have a low tolerance for uninterrogated misogyny in fics. both the Harris and the Fuller texts are full of sexist approaches to women, and it sometimes feels like the fandom (even years later, at a remove from when the show was premiering) dials that up to eleven without a second thought. so i'm hyper-critical of fics that position the women characters in the virgin/madonna/whore triad.
give me a character - beverly katz how i feel about this character: defensive, lmao. she's so interesting! the only woman in team sassy science AND she's a woman of color. non-whiteness is, uh, a super fraught position in the fullerverse, esp. hannibal. the fandom treated her like shit, Fuller arguably treated her like shit, justice for Bev Katz.
all the people i ship romantically with this character: will/bev has a soft spot in my heart. will/molly/bev is one more people should think about. bev/margot could've been so so good. bev/miriam??
my non-romantic otp for this character: i've seen team sassy science posed as a triad, but truly i do not see Bev having a romantic thing for either Zeller or Pierce, though i think she's fond of them as coworkers and friends.
my unpopular opinion about this character: she's the most nuanced female character, and her murder was both unnecessary on a narrative level and gross as a treatment of a nonwhite woman's body.
one thing i wish would have happened in canon: that she didn't get murdered as a deus ex machina! Bev is one of the main characters and she gets killed off-screen and then turned into a plot device as though she never mattered. when i die, i will find bryan fuller and haunt his ass!
my otp/ot3: i guess katz and dogs IS the hill i will die on.
#ask games#hannibal is a comedy#violetoftheendless#for a lesbian i front for a lot of m/f ships lmaooooooooo#just like. can we all acknowledge women have interiority???#also i feel like maybe five people understand/understood that the show is about how institutions generate the issues they claim to address#which is why hannigram is less romantic than...inevitable#it's a tragedy!
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I read your notes about DAQ on that wyll vs dorian post and i just could not agree more. Specifically the thing about krem you said, i absolutely hate how the game while trying to introduce trans friendly concepts just. Forcibly makes your character cis in association. Like no my inquisitioner would not say any of that shit!!! He is trans!!!! And you could tell that shit was not written by a trans person. I think they were trying to avoid using many trans specific words to fit in with the setting but like? "Why do you pass?" Is not a question that makes sense for someone to ask and i hate that theyre taking an existing trans term and trying to make it mean like....the entire concept of transitioning?? Idk i feel like i would be more ok if they could have you be like "oh dw i am also trans" but nah we as the player are just assumed to be cis. Also yeah as you said, inventing transphobia in a series where that wasnt present before, its annoying.
Oh dont get me started I could talk about my gripes with the handling of transness in dragon age (and particularly inquisition) forever. Actually do get me started this has been a long time coming.
i absolutely hate how the game while trying to introduce trans friendly concepts just. Forcibly makes your character cis in association
YEP. Yep yes exactly. your options are 'three flavors of being transphobic' or 'when did you know' . which is what i picked, because you can stretch your imagination a little at least.
But there's also this other tiny elephant in the room issue with Krem that i didnt mention in those tags. Or should i say. Bull in the room ? Because holy shit, way to take away the trans character's speaking voice and characterization so we get to know how much of an ✨Ally ✨the cis man bestie is! Like okay if you're being a transphobic shithead it makes a bit More sense that he'd get defensive and speak up for Krem, but when your question was 'when did you know', Krem answers 'when i was young. not a great thing to know about yourself' and then Bull immediately cuts in to cisplain transness is like? What was the Idea there. Which then makes the dialogue choices being 90% straight up transphobia MORE suspicious, because the game is letting you, almost pushing you to verbally harass Krem.. almost like he doesn't REALLY matter, he's just a vessel to see how Progressive And Trans Friendly And A Good Friend Bull is. Thanks, i hate it.
Even in terms of backstory Bull being Krems savior when he was trying to escape his life etc never really sat right with me. Like there's an underlying demsel vibe i feel the devs stuck in there that really irks me. Not helped by the fact that we dont have a trans voice actor. Also not helped by the fact that this is a fantasy setting with magic but some form of magic hrt? Nah too impossible. Like sure there's some implication that it MIGHT exist somewhere but because magic Bad in the dragon age setting and tevinter magic Even Worse he wouldn't go for it- Like ok. some people might prefer their trans realism in faux medieval media. even fantasy. Im not one of those people. And all those justifications read more like excuses to me. Like you're telling me the circles wouldn't be making BANK out of selling trans-your-gender potions and abusing the shit out of it? And just. Again this makes the setting retroactively much Worse because where before i could point to my warden or Hawke and go 'yeah that's a trans man via magic hrt' and someone who prefers trans realism could ALSO do the same when making theirs how they like. Vagueness in such matters allows for imagination! But now dai is saying noo they had to be cis. And your inquisitor also. Fuck that.
Also yeah as you said, inventing transphobia in a series where that wasnt present before, its annoying.
one tiny correction here. there were hints of transphobia in the first two games, but it was mostly contained in like. Oghren style aged like milk type humor. more meta than text i guess. like in the Pearl in game one if you ask to be surprised there's a chance you get the ever hilarious 'haha you got man in a dress' *crickets* And then Serendipity in mark of the assassin.. well the wiki says she's meant to be a drag queen. So not 100% related to this discussion. But the execution of her character just felt SO mean spirited to me when i was playing that i felt it needed to be mentioned as well. (So i just love her out of spite now. ) But anyway yeah. Out of all the lgbtq things dragon age touches on i feel like gender is one that they. dont really even try to tackle in good faith. And it just got worse as the games went on. I can handle easily skippable side gags that are shitty and unfunny. Inquisition tries to actually bring ATTENTION to the topic, and proceeds to fall flat on its face. Not to mention Sera. Them having one of the main companions being transphobic in banter.
Bioware when I catch you Bioware. Bioware when i catch you.
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i just saw your tags please tell me more about red white and royal blue
OKAY SO
Red White & Royal Blue is a queer romance novel by Casey McQuiston. It is the story of Alex, the 21 year old son of the President of the United States, and his enemies to lovers bromance turned romance with Prince Henry, the grandson of the current Queen of England.
And that bit of it is honestly mostly fine to me! I like that Alex is kind of a dumb boy baby bi who didn't realize the gay shit he got up to with his best friend was, indeed, gay shit. I like the part when Henry's older sister Bea tells Alex about how their father died when Henry was relatively young and how that grief just shoots down to the bottom of your soul, deeper than you thought yourself capable of feeling, and now when terrible things happen you automatically plummet to that same emotional low. I like the stuff going on with Rafael and how he was willing to tank his reputation in order to take down his potential abuser.
But hooooooooly shit the alternate reality this book exists in is so distracting.
First thing I should cover is that Alex's presidential parent is his mother Ellen Claremont, the first woman president elected in 2016.
Yes.
Claremont's reelection campaign in 2020 is a prominent part of the book, and Alex's secret romance with Henry is exposed by her Republican opponent via Alex and Henry's private emails.
*clicks tongue* Yeah.
Also, a lot of this does end up going down in 2019 and 2020, with not even a hint of pandemic, which, fair, I'll accept that. But it does feel really weird in the face of this other stuff.
And across the pond, Henry has to deal with his family finding out he's gay, specifically him coming out to his older brother Phillip and their grandmother Queen Mary. All of this feels so very weird to type out. The Queen and Phillip do not take it well at all, and at one point Henry does indeed threaten to abdicate, at least privately to Alex.
Soooooooo.
And this one's admittedly nitpicky, but Harry Potter references? Really? We do not need those, do we? Especially when you're indicating that you have people you care about that are indeed trans? (I've pulled up the Wikipedia article and have been informed that these references are removed from a later edition. On top of that, the author is nonbinary, so I imagine this might have been done not just because of readers commenting on it but them regretting writing in those references in the first place.)
And you know what, I don't know how much I've listed there is the problematic shit. Frankly, I sometimes have blinders on for this. I did not get involved in any of that "It's Totally Normal To Practice Kissing With Your Friends" shit, so idk how much of that is made up by media and how much of that really happens under the veil of wanting to actually kiss those of the same perceived gender. And since a lot of the stuff I read in this genre tends to be fanfiction (because I personally prefer having my blorbos at the ready to play Barbies with), I have no idea if the sex scenes are typical for this type of book compared to the wild-ass shit I read on the regular.
There's also the issue of Alex's race, which I am in no way qualified to talk about in depth but does merit mention: Alex is the child of an interracial marriage. His mother is white and his father is Latino. He is referred to as Alex, Alexander, Alejandro, Claremont (his mother's surname), and Diaz (his father's surname). The narration makes it clear that he is not perceived as white passing, that he is obviously Latino. And I have no idea what that might stir up. I didn't notice anything that made any alarm bells ring for me, but I am very white.
Overall, I was glad I listened to it. It hit the nice little niche it was aiming for, and I think there should be more stuff like it. But maybe put it in a universe not quite so close to ours like that.
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@frenchtoastfive said in the tags, August 23rd 2023:
#i agree with this post though the aggressiveness could be turned down#also harry potter fan hate in the comments?#harry potter fans don't support jk rowling#at least i dont#i like the world of harry potter#not the world of jk rowling is really transphobic#:D
Pro tip. The original poster can see your tags. Don't put bigotry in your tags.
A) I will stop being "aggressive" when people stop hijacking what was a simple post about not erasing disabled people to continuously defend eugenics and call me all sorts of names because they're mad I'm telling them they're ableist.
I've literally had multiple people call me the R slur because of this post.
If you think disabled people who are facing ableism are being "too aggressive" by getting angry at being continuously subjected to bigotry and people literally defending genocide against us, you're ableist!
If you think a post by a minority is too aggressive, either don't reblog it, or keep your tone-policing comment to yourself! That is literally bigotry!
By calling me aggressive for reacting appropriately to constant ableism, you have now joined the ranks of the ableists!
Don't tell minorities who are angry about the abuse they face that they're being too aggressive unless you're trying to be a jackass on purpose!
B) Yes. If you are still a fan of Harry Potter in 2023 you are ableist and racist and transmisic. JK Rowling is literally funding trans genocide with the money she made and Is currently making from the Harry Potter series and advocating for autistic trans people to lose all of our rights and instead be treated like inanimate property.
It doesn't matter that you try to say you only enjoy Harry Potter but don't support JK Rowling -- You are giving her free advertising every single time you talk about and share fan creations and enjoyment for her book series, which is filled to the brim with racism, antisemitism, classism, and so much fucking more.
If you actually support all the people that JK Rowling is literally fucking trying to wipe out, you would not be a Harry Potter fan in 2023.
There are literally endless other books you could be reading and writing about.
If you are still a Harry Potter fan in 2023 you are not fucking welcome on my blog, especially not if you're going to tone police me on a post where I respond with all due anger to constant ableism. Why do you think the post had to be edited four separate times? For fun?
And here's the "Harry Potter hate in the comments, which I added on April 29th 2023:
Harry Potter fans are banned from this post. So are James Cameron's Avatar fans. You people will not even be dignified with response you will just be blocked on sight.
So you, @frenchtoastfive saw that Harry Potter fans were not allowed to reblog this post. And you, a self-proclaimed Harry Potter fan, decided that not only didn't apply to you, but you also decided to make it clear you're a Harry Potter fan and are reblogging anyway.
If you don't understand why being a fan of Harry Potter in 2023 is unconcionable for people who actually support minorities, which does not just include trans people, then you are not listening to any of the people targeted by JK Rowling's actions. She is literally a billionaire funding laws with the goal of literal genocide in mind.
Let's put it this way: If Donald Trump wrote a kids series of books, would you call yourself a fan of his books while claiming you don't support him?
No?
Then why do you think it's okay to do the same with Harry Potter and JK Rowling when she is literally, not exaggerating, funding genocide?
How about you either stop being a fan of a bigoted series, or at least have the common courtesy to not reblog posts by people who explicitly told you to stay away, while you tone-police our anger from being subjected to bigotry -.-
What makes you think you're a good person for telling minorities we're being too aggressive in telling people to stop defending eugenics?
What makes you think you're a good person when you explicitly see that Harry Potter fans are not allowed to reblog this post, and you decide to do it anyways and announce you're a Harry Potter fan???
You cannot support the Harry Potter series without supporting JK Rowling. You cannot separate the author from her creations when she is still alive and using the profits from those characters to fund genocide. You literally can't.
Either actually listen to minorities when we tell you something is hurting us, or actually have common courtesy and don't fucking reblog posts that explicitly say for Harry Potter fans not to interact. Especially not if you're literally going to tone police us. Come on.
Dear people who aren't physically disabled who plan to write fantasy settings:
[ID: Several images taken from the Geordi La Forge yes and no meme format, with Geordi holding out a hand disapprovingly for the no section, then pointing in approval for the yes section.
The first image is the meme:
No: "Saying the existance of magic in your setting means there are no disabled people (this literally just means disabled people are killed. AKA eugenics)"
Yes: "Having disabled people who use magical mobility aids and other assistive devices. Realizing that someone is still disabled even if their prosthetic arm is made of magic instead of plastic."
This is followed by four more panels of yes section:
"Geordi la Forge is still literally disabled. His visor helping him does not erase his disability and make him magically abled."
"Toph from Avatar: The Last Airbender is still literally disabled even though her Earthbending helps her. It does not make her disability ~magically~ go away."
"Having your disability be accomodated does not mean the disability goes away. Having a prosthetic hand, even one that's made of magic, does not mean you're not disabled."
"Magical mobility aids do not mean disabled people don't exist. It just means they use magical mobility aids instead of plastic or metal ones. A limb made of magic is still a prosthetic even if it's made of the soul of the universe instead of plastic and metal."
Then another no panel: "'There's no disabled people beacuse magic'".
Then one last yes panel: "'Magic helps disabled people in a variety of ways'".
End ID.]
This also applies to science fiction; just because Luke Skywalker's prosthetic hand is super advanced doesn't mean it's no longer a prosthetic, or that he's not disabled. Same with Darth Vader - just because he has a suit that lets him breathe and walk around doesn't mean he's not disabled. (And Star Wars' propensity for making the villains visibly disabled while the heroes disabilities get covered up by super advanced prosthetics is a topic that deserves its own post, especially with how ableist some of the authors of the books are. Troy Denning is especially ableist)
Edit:
Because people keep being fucking obnoxious and ableist in the tags, yes,,, motherfuckers, if you refuse to have disabled people in your setting, that does make you fucking ableist. If you say that the magic is used to cure all disabled people and that's why they don't exist, that's fucking eugenics.
You cannot ""cure"", more like remove all disabilities without fucking eugenics. Magically automatically destroying disabled fetuses (a very fucking popular trope!) is eugenics.
The only way to fucking "cure" autism is to fucking kill all autistic people, also known as eugenics!
What about people with PTSD? Do you just fucking brainwash them so they aren't traumatized anymore?
Do you force all Deaf people to be able to hear? Do you force all blind people to be able to see? Do you force all anosmics to be able to smell?
Do you magically force everyone with a speech impediment to speak to your standards?
Do you force everyone born with bodily or facial differences to live up to your fucking standard of beauty?
You cannot fucking say "disablities don't exist in this universe because magic cures everything" without inherently saying that eugenics exists in your fucking universe.
Not all fucking disabilities need a cure. If you ""cured"" my autism I'd just be fucking dead. You'd literally just be changing me into what you think is fucking acceptable.
Stop fucking arguing in defence of ableists on my fucking post so you can pretend that eugenics has never been written about in magical settings when it is extremely fucking prevalent.
And while we're fucking at it, let your gods damned characters become disabled over the course of their story, and call them disabled within the fucking story. I don't care if they're a robot. I don't care if they have magic. Not all fucking damage can be fixed. Curses exist. Hardware can go out of fucking date and no longer be manufactured anywhere.
Let your characters become disabled and do not magically fucking cure them back to brand new every single time they get hurt. The only thing you accomplish by doing that is destroying any chance of ever having stakes.
No, "magical healing leaves scars on the mind from the memory of the injuries though!!!!" is not fucking good enough. Let your characters have scars. Let them become disabled. Stop being fucking ableist cowards.
Edit number fucking 2:
No, motherfuckers, you do not get to comment "if the disability was caused by magic it's not ableist to cure it with magic". You are the ableist this post is about. Shut the absolute fuck up, stop treating being disabled as the worst possible outcome, and just admit you're a fucking ableist. If you don't want your characters to become disabled, then don't fucking make them disabled.
[ID: The Garfield "you are not immune to propaganda" meme, now edited to read:
"If your first thought upon reading this post is, 'Oh, but it's okay to magically cure disabilities caused by magic!' Congrats…you are the exact sort of ableist jackass this post is about."
End ID.]
Edit number fucking 3:
Autistic people exist! People who are born with disabilities exist! You cannot create a setting where disabled people do not exist because we're all "cured" or "fixed" and not inherently say that you are killing disabled people as soon as they're born, or fucking aborting us as soon as you figure out we'd be born disabled! That's fucking eugenics!
There is no way to "cure" autism without eugenics! There is no way to "cure" people with body differences without eugenics! There is no way to make disabled people nonexistant in your setting without eugenics! Thinking you can and should "cure" and "fix" all disabilities IS EUGENICS!
Also:
[ID: A character shouting at the camera, now edited to read: "Shut up about Dungeons and Dragons! Shut up about Dungeons and Dragons! If the rules of Dungeons and Dragons are ableist, then fucking change them! It is your fucking personal responsability to be a better person than your bigoted society wants you to be!". End ID.]
[ID: White text on a dark brown background with white and black borders around the edges, that reads:
"I don't fucking know or care about Dungeons and Dragons.
This post is not about Dungeons and Dragons.
Do not fucking throw the rulebook of Dungeons and Dragons at me like it's some sort of 'Gotcha!'.
You will literally just be blocked like the rest of the ableist assholes who've already tried it.
If you play dungeons and dragons, it's your responsability to make your games not be ableist, even if it means breaking the rules.".
End ID.]
I do not fucking care what the ableist rules are in Dungeons of Dragons. Do not fucking throw ableist rules for a game I have never and will never play at me on a post I made so that people could learn how to make their settings less ableist. If the rules in Dungeons and Dragons are ableist, then fucking change them. If you don't want to change them, then stop fucking playing an ableist game.
Disabled people deserve to see ourselves represented in fiction just like everyone else, without any fucking requirements that we be "cured" or "fixed" before the story ends.
How the fuck would you feel if a trans and gay character's whole story revolved around going on a quest to become straight and cis, did so, and only then was allowed to live happily ever after?
Why do you fucking think suggesting people write stories about disabled people going on a quest to be cured because it's the only way they'll ever be happy is any less fucking offensive?
Also:
This post is NOT a place for you to talk about how disabled people in fiction should have the option of curing their disabilities. It's just not. That's the fucking default for this society. That is not a revolutionary concept. It's not novel. We fucking know this society wants us gone. A post about how disabled people deserve representation is not the place to talk about how "Well, actually, in fiction disabled people should be cured!" Like that's not the fucking universal default???????????
Edit #4:
Everyone needs to stop tagging this singing praise for Fullmetal Alchemist. A story that uses disability as a punishment and the characters are on a quest to cure their disabilities is not the amazing representation you're all claiming it is just because the character who is only disabled because of DIVINE PUNISHMENT uses prosthetics.
Read this post, and this one. Fullmetal Alchemist is a hell of a lot more ableist than you people are letting on.
guess what you can now find a PDF version of this post on the web archive.
#ableism#transmisia#sigh#long post#very long post#very very long post#I swear to gods#replies#frenchtoastfive
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