#and yes i am still working on the christmas stuff
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enjoythesilentworld · 15 hours ago
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2024 fandom review!
thank u for the tag @willesredlights sorry it took me literally ages to get to it
lets pretend we're not almost two weeks into the new year ok? and what a year it has been. holy shit.
~ Fics written ~
I'll be honest I did go a little batshit crazy this past year. 314k words across 19 published works, plus god knows how much more unpublished on tumblr. listen, I was deep in the ??? phase of my master's (still am, lets be honest) and desperately looking for a new creative outlet. I've always been a writer, always loved dreaming up stories, but I have never quite connected to a universe as much as I have to this one. I resonate with so many of the characters, and i just feel like there is so much room to play and explore. i will continue to add in old people OCs to my fics wherever and whenever i get the chance.
First fic: for the tree's sake (M, 48k) aka tree boys inspired by the trip that eventually led to my discover of young royals in late '23, and my darling baby. yes, that airplane ride that seems weird and random is based on truth!
Fav fic: just if for a minute (T, 53k) aka fake married idiots i greatly enjoyed making Wille suffer for just under 53k. that confrontation scene took days off my life and yet i am so proud of how it turned out.
Honorary mention to Growing towards the light, which was a dream to work on and create with my dear sweet friend Lia. there is one braincell between the two of us and it's full of nature facts and dick jokes. and beautiful stories about getting lost in the wilderness and finding yourself along the way. and tent-dick jokes.
Last fic: Wille på Hyllan (T, 13k) aka christmas shenanigans! another collab with my dearest friends which was hilarious to write and so silly and imo an example of one of the greatest perks of being in a fandom: meeting some of the most incredible people ever. also, dick-lights and dick-tomtar and dick-cookies. what more could you want?
~ Fics Read ~
if i tried to go through my history and tell you how many fics i read this year i would never make this post. i'd be here counting and trying to copy links forever. i read hundreds of fics. i enjoyed all of them, thoroughly. i got a lot better at leaving comments (sometimes). i was consistently and repeatedly blown away by the genius brains we have in this little Swedish corner of the internet.
if you are a writer i love you and i give u a kiss on the forehead.
also: i recently made a lil rec list here.
~ Other Stuff? ~
i had two big, busy months this year. three? : May, Wille's month & July, Simon's month i cannot believe i wrote 62 stories in 62 different universes (give or take a few). that's kind of stupid! but oh my god it was so fun!! some of my favs: -> Food, where Wille and Simon meet and embark on a mistakenly booked couples food tour in Barcelona -> Fashion/Style, aka the Met Gala AU aka the thing that turned into something so much bigger than i could have ever imagined. literally i thought people were gonna hate it. so, thank u for not hating it. and for letting it become 15k+ of pwp. -> Secret, friends to lovers RAHHHHHH -> Home (Improvement), aka grumpy home renovator Simon idk i just feel like this should become a full-blown fic one day
and oh boy who can forget about Kinktober from wax kinks in 17th century Italy to desperate love confession in the middle of wildfires to... whatever that was in the confessional (idk, that's between them and God).
2024...
I did some painting: x x I wrote some real weird lil ficlets: x x and I met dozens of incredible people. thank u for liking my stupid rambling posts from 3am and my silly little ficlets and for reading my stories and telling me about your stories and saving me from the Frankfurt airport and yelling with me about stuff thats definitely not in the Bible and sharing your time and space and art and care.
@bigalockwood @hergrandplan @gulliblelemon @saynomorefic @pagegirlintraining @skibasyndrome @sobadbad @impossibleknots @piebingo @theaviatorthatcouldnotfly @misfithive @sillylittleflower @zee-has-commitment-issues @purplehoodiesandclementines @justfriendsbestthings
giving u a big hug. and! this is by no means an exhaustive list. if ur reading this we are bffs. send me a message ok? ok. y'all keep me sane and happy and i am so grateful for you! live love wilmon
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abyssmal-skies · 4 days ago
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Who should be my theme for feb(valentines hshs)
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himblebo · 2 years ago
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My mom has historically not given me birthday gifts (growing up this was because she would let me do whatever I wanted for a birthday party, and since then it’s because she helped me pay for college or would take me to see a show etc) but my birthday is tomorrow and she just asked me “so… would you like a dress form for your birthday??”
Yes yes I would!!!
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astonmartinii · 16 days ago
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day seven: (christmas) star power | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem primary school!teacher
oh how one lie can spiral
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
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yourusername
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liked by yourbff, yourbrother and 204 others
yourusername: so ummmmmmm i pulled the short straw and am in charge of the school's nativity ??? AND THEN made a comment about my 'boyfriend' charles leclerc and now the whole school and WHOLE village think he is coming to the show ...
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yourbff: are you fucking dumb ???
yourusername: YES
yourbff: you told the headmaster that your boyfriend is CHARLES LECLERC ????
yourusername: i said it in JEST
yourusername: like ooohhhh my boyf charles
yourusername: and i guess that my framed picture of him on my desk definitely didn't help ...
yourbff: you have a framed picture of him on your desk...
yourusername: it was a christmas present from my cousin 😭
yourbff: oh but why would you have it on your desk - you're a primary school teacher all those kids do is ask questions
yourusername: why are you VICTIM BLAMING SO MUCH
yourbff: because you're DUMB
yourbrother: oh they're gonna stone you when they figure out it's not true
yourusername: they should know it's not true ITS CHARLES LECLERC
yourbrother: so you're saying you couldn't just go to monaco right now and pull him? disappointing
yourusername: 1. i'm broke as fuck 2. i am me and he is he
yourbrother: ugh such a skill issue
yourbff: bro it's hit f1twt
yourusername: WHAT
yourusername: who the fuck is on f1twt from our village
yourbff: maybe it was me...
yourusername: REALLY?
yourbff: no you actual dumbass
yourusername: no but for real these people are insane detectives they're going to figure out it's me and i'm going to be CANCELLED
yourbff: lol
yourusername: fuck you.
charles_leclerc
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liked by landonorris, pierregasly and 1,034,289 others
tagged: arthurleclerc & lorenzotl
charles_leclerc: just a quiet christmas for the leclercs this year
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user4: because we're going to somerset right?
user5: does he know he's meant to be in somerset?
user6: does he know what a nativity is?
user7: girl he may be an f1 driver who didn't finish school but he's not THAT dumb
landonorris: why am i seeing that you're coming to my ends for christmas?
charles_leclerc: am i??? why would i want to spend even more time with you?
landonorris: first of all - rude. second of all i have literally seen posters about you coming to the village?
charles_leclerc: what is a village?
landonorris: okay mr monte carlo some of use aren't from a tax haven
charles_leclerc: also when you're this beautiful, people tend to paste your face everywhere, you can't relate
landonorris: even RUDER
landonorris: my young cousin goes to the school and is completely convinced that you're coming to the show and dating his teacher
charles_leclerc: WHAT
yourusername: oh my jesus christ
user8: and if that one girl on f1twt made it all up...
user9: would be the only good thing to come out of that place
pierregasly: what is this i'm hearing of you having a girlfriend? charles i am HURT
charles_leclerc: where are you all hearing all of this stuff?
pierregasly: twitter!
charles_leclerc: oh jesus christ
pierregasly: you've got yourself in a right mess
charles_leclerc: ME?
charles_leclerc: this is clearly the work of a downright lunatic or a lonely cat woman with FAR too much time on her hands
yourusername: oh he gagged me there
yourbff: heyyy you have a dog not a cat!
charles_leclerc: who are you people?
yourusername: NO ONE
user10: what on earth is going on
user11: and WHO is @yourusername
yourusername: NO ONE
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landonorris
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liked by pierregasly, oscarpiastri and 1,034,277 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
landonorris: look who came to see me :)
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user13: holy....
user14: oh charles at the nativity is still so on
user15: my hopes are simply too high now good lord
user16: lowkey hoping this is all one big lie from f1twt that has managed to convince ACTUAL drivers to go to a random village
oscarpiastri: how did he get an invite to the norris house before i did ?
oscarpiastri: do my 'heart eyes' mean nothing to you?
landonorris: no babe i can explain it's for the bit
charles_leclerc: babe?
oscarpiastri: stay out of this old man
charles_leclerc: that's no way to talk to your father
oscarpiastri: my father wouldn't do such things for 'the bit" WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
landonorris: it's a joke osc
oscarpiastri: so i'm a joke to you? i see how it is
landonorris: NO THE TWITTER JOKE
landonorris: has he just put his phone on do not disturb?
charles_leclerc: he said he's going to bed (it is actually quite late in australia dude)
landonorris: how do you know that?
charles_leclerc: he replied to my text :)
landonorris: WHAT
charles_leclerc: family comes before whatever pathetic crush he has
user17: how have we gotten to this point?
user18: just smile and wave boys this is mental illness on show
charles_leclerc: you're right, having a crush on lando is mental illness
landonorris: then it's time to get your son sectioned!
alexalbon: well this has all gotten a bit serious now - can we get back to the actual reason charles is at your house?
yourusername: @yourbff oh brother this is getting TOO REAL
yourbff: to put it quite kindly you are royally FUCKED
yourusername: i might have to move to another country, change my name and get bangs :(
yourbff: NOT BANGS
landonorris: who are you people and why are you always camping out in our comment sections
yourusername: WE'RE NO ONe
landonorris: WAIT I HAVE MUTUALS WITH YOU?
landonorris: NOOOOOOOOO
landonorris: she blocked me?
yourbff
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liked by yourusername, landonorris and 304 others
tagged: yourusername
yourbff: take a good look at her folks because i have reason to believe that if a certain someone turns up at the show she will KILL HERSELF. love you queen, rest in divadom
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yourusername: this sounds very dramatic
yourusername: but you are correct
yourusername: my life will come to a short and all round inconsequential end tonight
yourbff: it is dramatic
yourbff: but i understand queen
yourbff: your celebrity crush who you have had a parasocial relationship with for years is coming with the express purpose of embarrasing you because he believes you are a sad, sad woman who has created an elaborate lie that you're in a relationship
yourusername: well yeah that sums it up pretty well - you think you could put that on my head stone?
yourbff: i don't think we can afford that
landonorris: i can pay!
yourusername: AHHHHHHH
yourbff: AHHHHHH
landonorris: oh forgot to say but found you! we have a lot of mutual friends lol
landonorris: actually i think my mum and your mum are in the same book club!
yourusername: you're aware this is creepy?
landonorris: you're aware that pretending to be my friend's girlfriend is creepy
yourusername: THERE WAS A GROSS MISUNDERSTANDING OVER MY DESK DECOR
landonorris: sureeeeeee
yourusername: also charles isn't even the only man i have framed on my desk, i have my dog, justin from wizards of waverely place, jason kelce and marc marquez, he's just the one the old lady picked out
yourbrother: now we have actual f1 drivers in the comments, how can we get free tickets from them?
yourusername: so my impending suicide means nothing?
yourbrother: not really. i might take your car if you die
charles_leclerc: so this was all one big scheme to get tickets? there's no show ???
yourbrother: that's what you're focusing on? not that she has a whole town under the impression that you're dating some irrelevant primary school teacher?
yourusername: rude?
charles_leclerc: a primary school teacher? that's cute
yourusername: wait did you think i was just doing the nativity for the love of the game?
yourbrother: who gives a fuck he called you CUTE
yourusername: oh!
yourbrother: she passed out :/
charles_leclerc: i didn't know i had that kind of effect on people
landonorris: oh fuck off of course you do
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charles_leclerc
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liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 1,539,056 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: met my long lost girlfriend (and most importantly her dog)
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user20: omg i do not know how to feel
user21: WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME SHE'S THAT BEAUTIFUL
user22: i 100% thought the gal was gonna at least be in her 40s
landonorris: i guess she puts on a pretty good nativity
charles_leclerc: which kid is your cousin?
landonorris: the lobster!
pierregasly: LOBSTER?
charles_leclerc: @yourusername why was there a lobster?
yourusername: ummmm there's a lot of kids in the class and i was running out of roles? all animals are gods creations?
charles_leclerc: seems sacrilegious but it was cute <3
charles_leclerc: just like you
pierregasly: that was awful
yourusername: SHUT UP
yourusername: thank you charles :)
charles_leclerc: no worries princess x
user23: i am losing my mind ?????
user24: bro got tricked into going to SOMERSET and has actually fallen for her
user25: i mean ... look at her
yourusername: i do also have a cracking personality if i do say so myself
yourbff: oh girl you needed it after i held your hair back three times in the lead up to meeting charles
yourusername: and i will repay you somehow ???
yourbff: well.... now you've charmed a certain someone can we inquire about his pool of friends
landonorris: hi!
charles_leclerc: no not that one he's not cute enough
landonorris: you're really mean
charles_leclerc: @yourbff may i introduce my good buddy joris
landonorris: JORIS ???
charles_leclerc: well i regularly want to throttle you so i think it would be better to go on double dates with someone i actually like ?
user26: charles leclerc is the origin of the sassy man apocalypse
user27: i think the paddock was the start of it all
yourusername: i can't believe this actually happened :')
charles_leclerc: and i can't wait to see where it goes
yourusername: see you for new years pretty boy
charles_leclerc: i think i already know who my new years kiss might be
yourusername: i'm already waiting :3
fin.
note: i hope you all had a fun christmas! i had a great day with my family and am workin hard to get the rest of this series out!
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truelovepolinator · 22 days ago
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Nicola and Luke are ABSOLUTELY TOGETHER and have been all along and here’s how I know
(Friends, I’ve just finished this and it is INSANELY LONG. Like, two looong book chapters long. But I PROMISE it’s worth it. I was gonna cut it into multiple parts to make it more readable, but I’m going to be super busy over the next few days, so I wouldn’t have a chance to post subsequent parts until probably Christmas, so I’ve decided to drop it all now so I don’t delay the final victorious conclusion. Sorry, it’s so long, but I don’t really have time to rethink it and try to tell the story in a more concise way. Again, I think you’ll be glad you stuck with it if you want to feel as thoroughly confident as I am that Nic and Luke are absolutely together.)
So I want to start by saying something I’m sure I’ll repeat. This is, of course, just my opinion and supposition based on the evidence available to me. But I also want to say, I am absolutely, positively sure now in a way I have never been. Genuinely not a doubt in my mind, and I think you’ll agree by the end of this.
It’s also worth noting that this may be nothing new to some of you. I’ve only been on this platform for a week and have barely scratched the surface of the great content here. So this is how *I* came to the final, joyful conclusion that everything is right with the world where lukola is concerned. I had long been sure they belonged together, but was afraid to embrace the theories about them actually being together now for fear of heartbreak, plus all the confusing signals about A & J, etc.
But all that changed a couple nights ago when I finally got the last piece of the puzzle I needed to see the big picture. There were just too many things that didn’t make sense, until they did! I literally couldn’t sleep that night (seriously only got about 2 hours) and then spent next day telling my husband the story for hours (in 20-30 minute increments as he could spare them during his slow, Christmas time work day).
My husband has been a patient, long-suffering skeptic through all of this. He’s put up with my rants and constant videos I just had to share, but he’s been completely convinced from day one that they simply leaned into their friendship to turn on faux relationship vibes for PR. He was absolutely sure it was all just make-believe for the fans. No matter what I showed him, he could not be convinced.
Until yesterday. Yes, I convinced the toughest skeptic in town.
I think it’s important to start with my journey into the Lukola fandom for context. I was a casual Bridgerton watcher until this season, and had never read the books. I liked season 1, I loved season 2, and I was looking forward to watching season 3.
I had planned to wait to watch the first 4 until the second half was about to launch (so I wouldn’t have to wait for more), but I realized after about a week that we needed to watch it immediately before everything was completely spoiled by timeline gifs and clips.
Needless to say, I was beyond hooked. Instantly. Season 3 was another level for all the reasons you all know. Finally I could engage safely with the fandom, but the process from occasional Polin/Lukola content to nonstop immersion took some time. So even following the second half, there was a TON of footage I hadn’t seen.
All of this to say, I basically missed all of the World Tour stuff as it was happening, and it took well into the summer to finally see so many amazing clips and edits that I was absolutely fucking sucked into the lukola wormhole. However, I was well behind many of you on the curve, and even to this day, I’m still catching up on things.
But by late summer, I was all in. I was sailing high on USS Lukola (or I suppose that should be the HMS Lukola!) because I saw exactly what you all saw. This was clearly real, their feelings were indisputable, and everything about their behavior and much of what they said was so far beyond PR, even “faking couplehood” PR.
They were real. Even if he had this dumb girlfriend. (I say that only in the good-natured, abstract sense that I wanted him with Nic, not in a personal “actually about her” sense. In fact, I’ve never said anything hateful about either A or J and I hope I never will.)
WHY AREN’T THEY TOGETHER???
I couldn’t resist the mystery.
It drove me absolutely crazy for months trying to understand why they weren’t together. Nothing made sense, but I mentally explored literally every possibility. They’re afraid of ruining their friendship? They’re afraid of disrupting the production if it goes wrong? These possibilities at least made some kind of sense and seemed to be the only explanations I could find. But in my mind, they weren’t good enough reasons to resist what these two so obviously had. Still, I’m not them, so that was easy for me to say. I had nothing to risk in this.
One or both of them is/are secretly gay? Soulmate besties instead of soulmate lovers? I didn’t think this was the case and nothing made me believe this. Yet, I was attempting to allow for every possibility. Still, with Nicola being the super vocal “gay icon” that she is, it was hard to imagine she wouldn’t live out and proud if that was the case. And apparently she lived with an unknown man for two years. Though she does always keep her private (romantic) life super private, so I suppose who knows? And, of course, Luke had two very public past relationships with women, but again, who knows, I suppose? This option doesn’t ring true at all, but it does exist in the universe of possible explanations for this inexplicable situation.
They love each other in a soulmate way, but somehow one of them just isn’t “attracted” to the other? Certainly, if the stories about Antonia were true, that might suggest that Luke might be attracted to an entirely different physical type than Nicola. But that didn’t ring true either because LOOK AT THEM TOGETHER! He can’t take his eyes off of her, let alone his hands. And the same for her. They are magnetized to each other. If that’s not attraction, what is?
One of them has baggage and isn’t ready for a real, serious relationship? This one seemed possible. People can have hang-ups or wounds for all sorts of reasons, and letting someone in – especially someone who might actually be your soulmate – can be terrifying. Self-protection by avoiding relationships and/or distracting yourself with less meaningful relationships is a natural way of coping with baggage. Yes, maybe this one? Neither of them seems obviously wounded, but what would I know? Most people don’t wear their wounds on their sleeves, least of all during a PR tour. Still, the energy flow between them seemed anything but wounded. It seemed like the healthiest, happiest thing in the world.
People kept saying, they’re blind and they don’t see it yet. But I don’t believe anyone can be that blind. Especially after watching all the countless edits and clips of their tour, which we know they did because Nicola is chronically online and sharing with Luke the best of it all (and sneaky Luke is likely lurking also).
So at the end of the day, I had no good explanation. It just kept not making sense.
Then those music festival photos of Nic and Jake (I’ll abbreviate sometimes for ease, but I do say their names) showed up. The fandom erupted into chaos with full reactions across the spectrum including a bizarre, almost immediate burst of (not yet named) jakolas, which felt like a disproportionate response to a few photos.
Admittedly, those photos did look quite friendly, and touchy, and yes, they stood arm-in-arm. But lots of friends stand like that at concerts. And Nic is known to be touchy-feely, so let’s not go overboard, I thought. However, I did acknowledge (in my head, I didn’t weigh in online at all) that it suggested that it COULD be romantic. I opted not to freak out, because either way, Nic’s love life is her own and I want her to be happy.
And it’s worth saying here that both of their private lives are none of my business, none of any of our business, and even writing this is completely at odds with that truth. I acknowledge that. But what I told myself, and actually meant it, was that I was going to stay out of it unless and until NicLuke got together. That was the only place I would invest my energy since they’ve both said they think it’s sweet that fans ship them. If they dated others, good luck to them. Be happy. But when the time comes…
Yes, friends, the time has come!!! But back to my story.
Note that (because again, I was still catching up), I hadn’t yet seen the swimming in Sorrento photos and had missed that piece of the puzzle at that point. Throughout this time, I’d see people refer to things on Twitter like everyone already knew what they were talking about, but hardly anyone ever took the time to explain. So I got lots of glimmers of things that others felt were notable, without actually knowing any details. Those pictures were an example. Another was the Claddagh ring.
I’m very grateful to some amazing deep dive blog entries by @threeacttragedy that explained the ring, “Bless the Telephone,” and other meaty, important history that I’d previously only heard mentioned in passing. In fact, one of her blogs is what first brought me here by referral from Twitter. And if you don’t follow her, you should!
In the past week, as I started reading blogs that broke down past dates and clues, I finally started looking them up one by one and trying to put the pieces together in my head. I’d seen the swimming photos by then, but I revisited them. I dug in to try to understand the references to a “New Year kiss” from the night the friend group (Rory, etc.) posted photos together from a Soho House party. I reviewed Hot Boy Summer, I rewatched the incredibly emotional video of Luke meeting Nicola’s mom, I looked at photos of the Claddagh ring and went to Chupi’s website. I learned about the LA photos from April, both Antonia’s version and the InStyle Polaroids. I reviewed all the photos of Luke and Antonia that I could find. And I reviewed all the photos and videos of Nic and Jake that I could find. Also, I listened to “Bless the Telephone” about one hundred times. Lol.
Regarding Luke and Antonia, I had the same response in this deep dive I’ve had every time. Weird. I mean, if I didn’t feel so strongly that Luke was in love with Nicola, and if I knew nothing about him except he was some hot actor, could I see him dating someone like A? Sure. But the fact that there are almost no pictures of them posing together, alone like a couple, is weird. Even if it’s super casual and she was just his date to some stuff. The fact that Luke looks grumpy in both sets of pap photos (premiere night and swimming in Sorrento), but A is smiling happily in at least one of the premiere night photos is weird. The fact that after the Sorrento pap photos, Luke seems to leave his friend group to come home early, and then stops liking any of his best friend Rory’s photos from there on, weird.
The fact that in the fall, she posts pictures harkening back to a place and time they were apparently together, but without any actual photos together, weird. And the continual drip, drip of Likes from Luke is weird. And then when a photo of Luke in a restaurant in Rome is posted by the restaurant, she immediately follows with a video story of someone making pasta in the same restaurant, weird.
Perhaps weirdest of all, the fact that she pre-posted the LA pictures, and then he gave other versions of the same shots to InStyle. Especially the switching seats thing. If my husband and I were taking pics of each other at a café, I’d take his picture in front of the traffic, and he’d take my picture in front of the restaurant, because that’s where we’d be sitting. Across from each other. So why switch seats to take the photos? It’s not like that street with traffic was such a fantastic backdrop that we’d each need our turn with that shot? And they’re the same, with the same table number, but different. Sure, traffic moves, but weird coincidence that they each had a white truck, but a DIFFERENT white truck. So, like I said, weird. Always implying they were together, but never actually saying/showing it. Weird.
I read all sorts of theories from pragmatic (we just have to accept that they’re dating) to hateful (they’re not together/never were, but she’s obsessed and keeps inserting herself in a pathetic, desperate plea for attention and followers) to seemingly far-fetched (some sort of NDA that means for some reason Luke is obligated to Like her photos). Only the first of these seemed plausible. I maybe didn’t like it (not maybe, I didn’t like it at all), but I thought, “Yes, I guess we just have to accept that they’re probably together until they tell us otherwise.”
(Though I held out a small sliver of “but we don’t know anything for sure until L and/or N tell us themselves” hope, which remains true even as I write this.)
Now, let’s talk about Nic and Jake. First, there were those shots from the concert (discussed above). Then, I believe, were the NYC shots (if I’m not confusing the order). In the NYC shots, they were both there, but they weren’t especially intimate in any interpersonal sense. Then, the pap shots on the street posted on DM, ostensibly catching them walking home together, holding hands and arm-in-arm after a night at the pub. With those photos came an onslaught of fandom fury and gossip site reporting about how “Nicola Coughlan confirms her relationship…” Same story runs across a bunch of trashy sites, all saying the same thing and citing an unnamed source talking about how besotted they were, or whatever the quote was.
Admittedly, I was among the furious fans. Not because of what the pictures showed. Again, I was trying to be serene and Zen about them and their private lives. I believed with all my heart that NicLuke belonged together, but if now wasn’t their time, I’d have to wait. I didn’t love that I’d heard he was only 24, but I was trying to balance my efforts to be a non-judgmental person with my discomfort over that issue and reminding myself that her choices are none of my business (unless she chooses Luke!).
So I did my best to refrain from judgment, even as I saw the fandom erupt into toxic madness about whether it was true, whether he was gay, whether the age gap was wrong, whether DM lied about the date, and if they did (which they did), why? But I figured, unless the photos were very, very old, things weren’t likely to have changed in their relationship over a couple weeks, so I wasn’t overly concerned about the date.
However, I was angry about all these stories (basically the same story across the board) announcing that she’d “CONFIRMED” the relationship. It made me very angry that they said she confirmed something when she’d done nothing of the sort. I wasn’t prepared to argue that she wasn’t dating Jake at that point, but why would they all run this story, with this headline, when what actually happened was a paparazzi photographer snapped shots and sold them, then the media drew conclusions from what they saw?
Nicola never confirmed a damn thing. So why were they running this headline so universally?
I was also angry that the photos existed at all. Photos in her neighborhood could reveal her location and put her safety at risk. Also, how did they happen to be there to take those photos late one specific night? Felt like they must have received a tip. But I moved on and forgot about that part.
Time went on and I saw more and more discussion of Jake’s sexuality. I don’t really want to get into that here because I don’t really feel comfortable speculating about anyone unless they choose to explicitly come out, but I did finally start poking around his page, Douglas’s page, etc. and began to understand why people were saying what they were saying. However, I reminded myself that bi/pan-sexuality exists and I wasn’t willing to partake in bi-erasure, so I held my tongue and kept watching.
Now, at this point, I want to remind us all that Nic has always been extremely private and uttered nary a peep in public about her romantic/sexual life. And fair enough. It’s none of our damn business. Also, she’s talked extensively about how women are not just men’s girlfriends and her feminist take on many things and how it doesn’t feel nice to know that people are more interested in her love life than her work. She’s worked freaking hard to achieve the success she’s now enjoying, and she certainly should not be reduced to a woman in a relationship. No matter who is on the other end of that relationship.
(Again here, I feel the need to acknowledge my hypocrisy in writing this, but I really do genuinely love Nic’s work and spirit and activism, etc. as well.)
So, in light of her position on all of that, we wouldn’t expect her to go public with a new love interest. The fact that she was papped with this guy (if indeed he was a love interest) was just an indication of how much her celebrity and profile have grown. There’s greater interest now and she’s more recognizable now, so it’s to be expected that she’d have a harder time keeping her love life private now than in the past. Not so strange then, that she got caught a couple times in paparazzi photos at this point.
However, would she really then go public with that guy? That would mark a radical change in her behavior just when you’d think she’d want to be the most private because the glare of the spotlight is brighter than ever. Still, she allowed a public photo with him, Camilla, and Evan Ross Katz to go out shortly thereafter. If one believed they were dating, that could certainly be interpreted as a launch. Yet, as I said, would she really do that if she were dating him?
Then he started popping up everywhere. I won’t get the chronology here right because I don’t want to research the dates right now, but there was the Charlie xcx concert, in which she appeared with Jake and Dylan, who is out and proud. The Queer premiere where he was just caught in the background of a fan photo. The simultaneously released photos from the red and gold restaurant (with a mysterious third person taking the photos). There was the apparently brunch-time photo of her with Jake and two others, taken by Dylan. And most recently, Louisa’s photo with Jake and Douglas (who is also openly gay and close friends, if not more, with Jake).
I’m not mentioning all the players in all of these because it’s not critical to the story, and I may be forgetting some photos, but there is a point to all of this. First, there’s potentially a notable shift in what she’s allowing to be shared here. Again, historically, she’s never shared anything about her love life. Suddenly, she’s letting him be photographed everywhere. Also, at most of these events, there were other queer participants and/or queer content (the movie premiere).
And while she’s never allowed her romantic life to be shared, you know what she has often shared? Photos with all of her platonic friends, including her huge friend group of many, many gay men. So this trend in what she’s allowing to be shared suggests that she’s telling a story and clarifying Jake’s role in her life.
But then there’s that one mystery release, the simultaneously timed restaurant photo drops. Clearly coordinated, clearly indicating they were there together. No indication about the third party. Why? Just enough to hint that there might be something going on, and to continue wreaking havoc in the fandom.
Because remember that toxic fandom bickering over all of this? The jakolas swearing they’re in love and soon to be engaged and furious at the lukolas for “being blind and refusing to accept the truth and it’s so disrespectful to Nic ('who you claim to love') by disregarding her feelings and treating the love of her life so badly. They keep showing you they’re in love and you won’t listen!” Etc., etc.
Meanwhile, the lukolas fall into a couple camps. By this point, most have decided Nic and Jake aren’t dating, but some remain circumspect. Some scream back at the jakolas, ostensibly in defense of Jake, saying very similar things about “Jake and his friends are doing everything in their power to show you the truth and you refuse to see it.” And a variety of other responses. Everyone’s mad at everyone.
And all of it, every bit of it, keeps us ALL talking about Nicola Coughlan and Luke Newton. Nonstop, every day.
Now, we are nearing the big mic drop of all of this, and I want to say at this point that we need to remember that Nic and Luke are HUMAN BEINGS who have a right to privacy. And they are celebrities living in a world that has an intense interest in their love lives. And sometimes, we might not feel good about the measures they must take to protect their privacy. We might hate those measures. We might feel manipulated, and we are. But if we love and respect them as much as I hope we all do, we can also understand and forgive them for taking such measures.
A quick review of important factors in all of this:
THINGS THAT TELL US IT’S REAL
The Galway trip and that very emotional introduction to Nic’s mom, which looked for all the world like a woman meeting her future son-in-law
The Claddagh ring and how she’s been wearing it
The things reporters, cast, and crew have said in passing and/or posted, not to mention recent open shipping from Ryan Wheeler and Shondaland’s IG
Everything we saw with our own eyes on the world tour, not to mention everything we’ve seen in the BTS
Little droplets of NicLuke over the recent months like Bless the Telephone and (not yet mentioned above) the S4 selfie and the photo of them in costume that Nic said she thought she’d shared, but now it’s ours (while she hasn’t posted any Jake)
The absolute consistency of all of this as a story that makes sense
THINGS THAT MAKE US DOUBT IT’S REAL AND/OR KEEP US GUESSING AND DISCUSSING
The premiere night pap photos (and though I didn’t mention it earlier, the fact that Nic went home that night so she wasn’t around for A’s attendance)
The friend group photos at Soho House with Luke, A and others
The weird LA InStyle photos
The Sorrento swimming photos
The multiple sets of pap photos of Nic and Jake, including grainy night-time neighborhood photos (with a woman walking a dog in the background)
The way every gossip news outlet ran the same “Nicola confirmed her relationship” story with the same headline and the same anonymous quote
The weirdly devoted, intensely defensive jakolas/Jake stans that seem to care about nothing but Jake/jakola out of nowhere and love screaming at and stirring up shit with lukolas
The chaos and constant discussion of all of this over the past 6+ months
The absolute inconsistency of any of this with anything in the top group
So, this mystery just gets deeper and deeper, and none of it makes sense. Every time I’d try to accept that they were just seeing these other people, something would bump in my head. There were just too many weird things that didn’t quite make sense and the biggest, weirdest one of them all was that NICOLA AND LUKE ARE CLEARLY IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER.
So while the pieces would always almost fit, the puzzle never quite took shape. Until two nights ago when I stumbled on @lukolafan ’s page after they liked one of my posts. I scrolled down their page and found a link labeled “Lukola PR Strategies and Fake Narratives.” I cannot scream this loudly enough. GO VISIT THAT LINK!!!!! (I’ll add the links myself later if I have time.)
I did and it led to a series of Reddit posts taking an academic approach to teaching us, the general public (and lukola fans) PR Media Literacy. Among the various topics it discussed were things like:
“PR Firms and Entertainment Media: Coordinating “News” Across Gossip, Entertainment, and Official Publications,” which talks about using anonymous sources, more about staged paparazzi, and repeated narratives (“outlets echo identical stories, reinforcing PR-approved messaging, for example, multiple outlets platforms describing a celebrity ‘rising above’ a controversy, quoting the same anonymous insider” – Sound familiar?)
“The Invisible Hand of Celebrity Privacy: How PR Fabricates Narratives and Manipulates Fans,” which includes ways that PR strategies intentionally manipulate fans to fight/debate celebs faking relationships, and more (sound familiar?)
There’s honestly so much meat in all of these (there are a couple others as well) that they are ALL worth reading. There is definitely some repetition, but still, the content is super insightful and revealing and can help us all be more savvy consumers of media.
But I want to focus on two CRITICAL posts, in particular.
“The Role of Staged Paparazzi and Gossip Outlets in Celebrity PR Campaigns”
The first part of this piece talks about the method for staging fake paparazzi photos to create narratives. Two items of particular note (and I’m excerpting directly):
Quality Control of the Image: While professional photographers use high-quality cameras, staged paparazzi photos are intentionally manipulated to appear grainy or blurry. This adds a layer of authenticity to the photo, making it look as though the photographer stumbled upon the celebrity by chance.
Extra Figures in the Background: Another key tactic in staged paparazzi photos involves the use of background extras—people who might be walking with dogs, pushing strollers, or simply in the vicinity.
Think of Nicola’s photos walking home with Jake, a woman walking a dog behind them. Some of them are clear, but some are quite grainy, despite the fact that professional photographers have great equipment and are more than capable of taking a night-time shot.
Another excerpt…
Gossip Outlets: DeuxMoi and the Symbiotic Relationship with PR Firms
With the rise of user-generated content and anonymously submitted tips, gossip websites have become integral to the modern celebrity PR machine. Sites like DeuxMoi thrive on rumors and speculation, providing a platform for fans and anonymous sources to share celebrity gossip. PR teams exploit these platforms to feed their desired narratives without appearing to directly control the flow of information.
How Gossip Sites Like DeuxMoi Work:
Anonymous Tips and Leaks: PR teams often send anonymous tips to gossip outlets, offering details about celebrity activities or sightings. These tips are deliberately vague, leaving room for interpretation and speculation. Once posted on sites like DeuxMoi, the stories tend to snowball as they are shared across social media and republished by larger outlets.
Fueling Speculation: These posts generate buzz and speculation, keeping celebrities in the public eye without any direct confirmation. Gossip sites become a key player in amplifying the narrative, as fans, influencers, and media outlets continue to discuss and spread the information.
Mutual Benefits: While gossip sites operate independently, there is a mutual benefit to the relationship between them and PR teams. Gossip sites thrive on traffic and engagement, while PR teams can ensure their client’s name stays relevant in the public discourse. By subtly feeding stories, PR teams maintain control over how their celebrity’s narrative unfolds.
The piece goes on to give specific examples like Kendall Jenner and Bad Bunny, Tomdaya, Gigi Hadad and Zayne Malik, etc. then talks about fake fan interactions and how to spot them.
It offers key questions to ask about the photos you see (like what story is it telling and why and who benefits?) and then it gives this example. If your ears aren’t already fully perked, this will do it:
Example: 37-Year-Old Famous Actress and 24-Year-Old Lesser-Known Celebrity
Narrative of Romance or Distraction: In this case, the 37-year-old actress is likely fueling rumors of a relationship with the 24-year-old to either distract from something else in her personal life (like a real romantic partner) or to refresh her public image. The younger celebrity could be hired to play a temporary love interest or interest figure in the media, leading people to speculate whether they are more than just friends.
Creating a Romance or Mystery: The photo of them walking arm-in-arm, laughing, or holding hands might suggest that a romantic connection exists. This could be used to make the actress seem more relatable, desirable, or single, even if there is no romantic involvement behind the scenes.
Diverting Public Focus: If the actress is privately in a relationship with another celebrity or involved in an ongoing controversy, the staged photo with the younger celebrity helps to deflect attention. By inserting a "mystery romance," the public is more interested in who the new partner is, leaving the actress’s real partner or issues to stay out of the spotlight.
PR Stunt to Revitalize Publicity: The actress might not just be looking for romantic gossip but also fresh exposure. A curated paparazzi shot could serve as a PR tool to keep the actress's name in circulation—be it through romantic rumors, new partnerships, or simply new media content to fuel speculation.
Potential Body Double for Real Partner: If the real partner is shying away from the public eye or trying to avoid the media, the younger celebrity might act as a "body double" or decoy. This helps maintain an image of the actress being in a public relationship, while allowing her to keep the real relationship.
Don’t think I need to explain the relevance of this very specific example. There’s a lot more in the post, but I’ll move on for now to the next key post.
“Breadcrumbing and Coordinated Campaigns”
In this piece, they offer first some key breadcrumbing tactics, many of which sound awfully familiar.
Common Types of Breadcrumbs:
Cryptic Social Media Posts: Celebrities post vague messages or abstract references, sparking fan theories. Example: Harry Styles posts cryptic images or quotes, prompting speculation.
Coordinated Social Media Timing: PR teams synchronize posts to create the illusion of a shared narrative. Example: Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss posted similar content at the same time, fueling relationship rumors.
Accidental Social Media Interactions: Liking posts or commenting on ambiguous tweets creates intimacy and speculation. Example: Kendall Jenner engages with fans on social media, fueling rumors.
Seemingly Innocent Photos: Casual photos subtly hint at a larger narrative. Example: Zendaya and Tom Holland posted photos together, teasing their relationship.
Cryptic? Like Bless the Telephone? Or a mysterious left-handed guy holding a phone in the background while Nic gets ready?
Synchronized like Nic and Jake at that restaurant? Or as far as that goes, like Nic and Luke with the S4 selfie?
Accidental social media interactions? I didn’t go into that here, but we’ve seen lots of odd likes and things, lots of Nic interactions, oh, and those RW and SL likes of late.
Seemingly innocent photos. Like very happy looking S4 pics and the “now it’s yours” BTS photo?
Perhaps most of this could be interpreted as just genuine fan interaction and fan service, which I think it is to some extent. It’s a natural part of the business. But it’s also very often done with intention.
But here’s the more important part of this piece. It gives some case studies (Ben and JLo, Shawn and Camila), then it gives two “abstract” examples.
YOU’LL LOVE THIS. Note that the second example changes to an actor and a musician, but don’t let that fool you. Keep reading for some unmistakable specifics.
Breadcrumbing with a Fake PR Girlfriend: Case Study of Celebrity 007
For Celebrity 007, breadcrumbing is used to create a false narrative about a relationship with a PR girlfriend. This helps maintain fan interest while deflecting attention from the celebrity’s true personal life.
How It Works:
First Breadcrumbs: The PR strategy begins with posts from both the celebrity and the PR girlfriend, hinting at a connection without confirming it. Example: Celebrity 007 posts a picture from a Paris restaurant or cafe in LA and the PR girlfriend shares a similar post from the same location but from a different day with different white trucks in the background (double check the Instyle Stunt images!!!)
Expanding the Narrative: Shared travel posts and indirect interactions continue the illusion of a relationship. Example: Matching geo-tags in posts from Rome suggest they were there together.
Indirect Engagement: Likes, comments, and ambiguous interactions increase intrigue without confirming the relationship. Example: The PR girlfriend comments, “Great to be here with you! 💖,” on Celebrity 007's post.
Paparazzi Shots: Carefully timed candid shots further reinforce the illusion of a relationship. Example: Paparazzi photos of Celebrity 007 and the PR girlfriend walking hand-in-hand, fueling speculation.
Note:
Café in LA, same location, different trucks?
Matching tags in Rome?
Likes and ambiguous interactions
Carefully timed (say at a premiere party) candid paparazzi shops w gf walking hand-in-hand
And then there’s the next one. In the interest of length since this is already hella long, I’ve removed some less relevant parts, but I encourage you to read it yourself.
Breadcrumbing to Hide a Real Relationship: Case Study of Celebrity 009
Why Hide the True Relationship?
In celebrity culture, the decision to keep a relationship private—or hidden—can be a strategic move, driven by a mix of personal privacy and professional interests. Some celebrities may choose to share their personal lives openly, but for others, particularly those who value their privacy or wish to control their public image, keeping a relationship private is key. This is especially relevant for two celebrities who are romantically involved but prefer to maintain discretion, despite public curiosity about their relationship.
Whether it’s a high-profile couple like Beyoncé and Jay-Z, or a less conspicuous pairing, the decision to hide the true nature of a romantic relationship often involves balancing personal desires with career strategy. In this scenario, let’s explore why two celebrities might choose to keep their relationship under wraps and the complex PR considerations that lead them to do so.
Media Scrutiny/Escaping Constant Surveillance: Navigating the Spotlight Together (I’ve combined two sections here for length)
When two celebrities become romantically involved, the media will inevitably take notice. The relationship can quickly become the focal point of constant headlines, paparazzi photos, and gossip columns. For celebrities who value their privacy, this level of scrutiny can feel overwhelming, as every public appearance or moment shared can quickly turn into speculation, even if the couple doesn’t wish to attract attention.
Romanticized Expectations: The Pressure of Perfection
Media scrutiny often creates an unrealistic, romanticized version of a celebrity relationship. Fans and the public tend to project their fantasies onto famous couples, imagining them as the perfect, unbreakable pairing. The real complexities of a relationship—differences, compromises, and struggles—often don't fit neatly into the idealized narratives created by the public.
For a couple like Actor A and Musician B, the pressure to live up to these idealized expectations can be exhausting. By choosing to keep their relationship private, they can avoid the constant pressure to fit into a preconceived mold. Hiding the relationship from public view allows them to keep things grounded and avoid being turned into a media spectacle.
Brand Control: Managing the Image of "Singleness" or "Availability"
For many celebrities, their public image is closely tied to their brand, and that brand may depend on their perceived "availability" or their status as desirable, unattached individuals. The way the public perceives a celebrity’s romantic life—whether they are single, dating, or in a long-term relationship—can have a significant impact on their professional success and marketability.
Creating Room for Desire: The Allure of the Single Celebrity
Consider Actor A, a leading man known for portraying romantic heroes on screen. The public’s perception of Actor A as a single, unattainable figure is key to their marketability, both in the media and as a brand. If they were to publicly reveal a relationship with Musician B, it could diminish that aura of unattainability. Similarly, Musician B may want to maintain a flirtatious public persona, which could be undermined if they were publicly involved with someone. By keeping the relationship private, both celebrities retain the allure of being desirable and unattached, feeding into the fantasies of their fans.
Avoiding the "Couple" Brand: Risk of Being Reduced to a Package Deal
When a high-profile couple’s relationship is made public, they may become known less for their individual work and more for their collective identity as a couple. In some cases, the couple's public appearances or shared brand messages may overshadow their individual projects. Think of Beyoncé and Jay-Z, who have an incredibly powerful couple brand that often eclipses their solo endeavors in the media. For celebrities like Actor A and Musician B, the fear of being seen as a "package deal" might drive them to hide their relationship. This allows both to maintain their distinct identities, keeping their projects and brands separate and preventing the public from viewing them solely as a pair.
Respecting Boundaries: The Vulnerability of Celebrity Relationships
Even when two celebrities are involved, the vulnerabilities of a relationship can become the focus of media attention if they go public. Romantic relationships—especially those in the high-pressure world of celebrity—are often fraught with ups and downs. The public might demand to know every detail, fueling rumors of breakups, infidelities, or relationship drama. By keeping their romance under wraps, Actor A and Musician B can avoid becoming the subject of constant gossip and can maintain some semblance of normalcy in their private lives.
Avoiding Disruptive Publicity
Celebrity relationships often attract media scrutiny not only about their romantic lives but also about how their relationship affects their careers. The public and the media often delve into the smallest details, speculating about how the relationship might impact their professional trajectories, previous relationships, or future projects.
Career Disruption: The Challenge of Balancing Love and Work
For celebrities like Musician B, a new relationship can take attention away from their upcoming album release or concert tour. The media’s obsession with their personal life might overshadow the launch of a new professional project. Similarly, if Actor A is in the middle of promoting a film or preparing for a big role, the press could focus more on their relationship than their craft, disrupting the flow of their work.
I won’t bother reviewing the relevance of all of the above. I’m sure you can see it plainly for yourself. The examples are absolutely, positively referencing Nicola and Luke, and the reasons for hiding it are super relevant. Especially boundaries, disruption, pressure to be perfect, and being reduced to a package deal.
Now at this point, it’s worth asking the question, do we trust this source? I don’t actually know who posted this content, so I can’t verify their credentials. Perhaps this is yet another PR person’s tricky efforts to continually confuse us and keep us guessing? That seems unlikely since the entire purpose is to help lift the veil on all the other tricks. If you wanted the other tricks to be effective, you’d hardly be revealing them to your target audiences.
But even setting that very logical assumption aside, the reason I know with every fiber of my being that it’s true is that this is literally the only version of events that makes sense of absolutely everything.
All those mysterious and confusing signals, all those weird photos and changes in behavior, all the inconsistencies between what we all saw with our own eyes (they are IN LOVE) and what we saw subsequently with the adjacents, all the tiny Lukola crumbs keeping us hanging on, and all the fandom bickering, especially from bizarrely rabid jakolas.
Every bit of it makes complete sense if we accept that Nic, Luke, and their PR teams have been using a classic PR handbook to distract us from the very real truth that they are together and in love.
Does it hurt to know we’ve been manipulated? You bet it does! But I quickly accepted that because I was so happy to have the truth verified at last. And because I understand why they would do it.
Relationships are hard enough when lived in private. No relationship, no matter how much people love each other, is without challenge. Even soulmates have issues to navigate. Can you imagine the pressure on them if the whole world was watching?
And their lives have added challenges. Travel and separation. Long work schedules that may often be at odds. Possibly romantic scenes with future co-stars that could stir up uncomfortable feelings. Career ups and downs that may not always synch up. Fans and media watching their every move, dissecting them, judging them, rooting for them, and just putting massive pressure on them. What if they fail? They’re letting down the whole world, not just themselves.
And what about Nic’s longstanding demand for privacy? And her emphasis that no woman is just some dude’s girlfriend. She wants to be known for her own work and achievement and passions, not for who she dates or marries. Even if it is wonderful Luke.
Likewise, Luke is just now achieving a newfound level of success. This is a moment for him to seize and make the most of. Being a hot, sexy, ostensibly single guy is good for his brand right now. Even if we know he loves Nicola, his stans need to be able to fantasize about him, which is easier if his relationship is unconfirmed.
And let’s face it, if they come out as a couple, IT WILL BE LUKOLA all the time. That will be the story. Certainly if they’d come out during the World Tour, every question at every stop would be about them and their personal “friends to lovers story.” It would be irresistible to reporters. Too good a story to ignore. And they’d spend way more time talking about their personal lives than about their work. Does that sound like something either of them would want?
And one last thing. Back to their changes in behavior. Does it make more sense that Nicola, who has always been super private about her love life, would suddenly be willing to be photographed constantly with her new bf Jake? Or that Jake is not her bf and she’s keeping her actual bf (or fiancé or husband) secret?
Meanwhile, Luke, who has always been open about his relationships in the past suddenly decides to tighten up and share absolutely nothing about his private life? Well, that makes complete sense if he’s now in a relationship with a woman who is famously private and shares not one word publicly. Suddenly, literally everything makes sense and is entirely consistent.
So there it is, folks. To me, this is the Holy Grail. There’s not a doubt left in my mind about them. They’re together and everything else – literally everything else – is a decoy and a distraction, and every bit of it comes straight from the PR playbook.
I’d like to maintain a sliver of hope that they’re leaving much of it to their teams and they’re not in on the worst of it, but in any case, I don’t blame them one bit for trying to protect their love. It’s too special to let it be destroyed by public consumption. You gotta do what you gotta do.
Given that I don’t actually know them and haven’t confirmed anything directly, I’ll leave 1.5% room for doubt, and adjust my certainty to 98.5%.
And you may dismiss all of this and draw very different conclusions, which is okay, too. But if I’m being really honest, I’m actually 1,000% sure. And I couldn’t be happier for them.
What do we do now? That’s up to each of us. Personally, I’m going to be blissfully happy for them, not sweat any of the distractions, let them live as quietly as they like, and patiently await the day (whether it’s very soon or far in the future) when they finally go public. I hope you’ll do the same.
And until then, I’m going to keep watching Lukola videos on repeat.
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fallstaticexit · 1 month ago
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Prev / Next (Intermission) / Beginning
Transcript under the cut
Nancy Narrates: [Before I knew it, Vanessa began to carve out a space in my life. It was such a comforting, familiar feeling, as if the space for her was already there. All she had to do was fill the void she had left behind]
Malcolm: Hey Auntie V, are you coming to our Christmas Eve party?
Jonathan: Yeah! You should come! We have all the good desserts and daddy let’s us open one gift each too.
Malcolm: Well, I open two when everyone goes to bed!
Vanessa: Sounds like a bitchin’ good time. I’m in.
Nancy Narrates: [I was beginning to feel there weren’t enough hours in the day to spend alone together. There wasn’t enough time to learn all the ways she’s changed, all those intimate little details I craved to know. Apart of me still feared she would leave me again. Maybe that’s why I craved more of her]
Nancy: I want to build you a home right here, in Brindleton Bay. I’d like you to be close to me- to the boys. They’ve taken a liking to you.
Vanessa: [smiles] Oh, just the boys, huh?
Nancy: [blushes] I could start right away. I can even make sure you have a little reading nook. Do you still like to read?
Vanessa: I do. I’ll need a big ass closet for my heels alone.
Nancy: Anything you like.
Jonathan: Mom! Auntie V! Are you watching? Mom!
Nancy: Yes, I’m watching!
Vanessa: A large kitchen with a window view of the ocean.
Nancy: A spacious backyard, for a garden.
Vanessa: A big, deep bathtub to soak in, with a view of the bedroom, of the bed.
Vanessa: You could visit me. Come and go as you please.
Nancy: Well. I’m sure you’d have...suitors there. Women...
Vanessa: In the house you built for me? You better be the only woman I see there.
Bob: [chuckles] Those two, am I right? Some things never change.
Geoffrey: Yeah. It’s like stepping into a time machine. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her that close to anyone before. She’s been happier lately.
Bob: Like I’ve said, female friendships are intense. Hey, you uh, ever talked to her about what you told me?
Geoffrey: I never really had the time. She’s always off somewhere with Vanessa, or Vanessa is always there. Maybe it’s not worth mentioning.. it’s not like I ever saw it again.
Bob: It get it, it’s a tough conversation. Just don’t let it sit and rot, you know?
Geoffrey: Right..
-
[collective chatter]
[collective chatter]
Nancy Narrates: [I hate that it bothered me; the thought of her with other women. She’s single. She’s beautiful. Of course she has. I’m sure she will continue to]
Nancy Narrates: [Why does it matter anyway? We are just friends, after all]
Eliza: [chuckles] Why are you out of breath?
Geoffrey: I’ve been chasing after the boys all night. The photographer is here to get a family photo for the Foundation’s newsletter. Haven’t seen Nancy either.
Bob: 100 bucks she’s wherever Vanessa’s at.
Geoffrey: Yeah, I figured as much. Haven’t seen Vanessa either.
Bob: Probably wherever Nancy’s at [laughs].
Eliza: Bobby, please. Ignore him Geoffrey, it’s the eggnog. I’m pretty sure I saw Nancy go into the barroom.
Vanessa: [tsks softly] You’re not hiding from me, are you?
Nancy: No, of course not.
Nancy: Sipping champagne wasn’t hard enough. I guess I wanted to think about something else other than the other questions I want to ask you.
Vanessa: Hmm, I thought I answered them all. Like what?
Nancy: What do you do for work that makes you travel so often? You still haven’t told me.
Vanessa: It’s nothing to rave about, really. Boring stuff. Besides, is that what you really want to know?
Nancy: What’s in that little box you’re holding? I was hoping our no gift rule had no expiration date.
Vanessa: I never got a chance to get you gift back then, so you owe me this. Besides, you’ll like this one.
Nancy: [laughs] A brooch? You actually got me a brooch?
Vanessa: [giggles] What? It was ‘really, really expensive’.
Nancy: This is the world’s longest joke, you know that?
Vanessa: If there’s one thing I’ll do, it’s commit to the bit. Now stop wiggling or I’ll poke you. Do you like it?
Nancy: I love it. Thank you.
Vanessa: It looks good on you. I had it custom made, just for you.
Vanessa: Emeralds, like the color of your eyes.
Nancy: [inhales sharply]
Nancy: Have you been with other women?
Vanessa: A few. Have you?
Nancy: O-of course not..
Vanessa: [hums thoughtfully]
Vanessa: Don’t be mad at me for saying but, I’ve thought of you when I was with them. I guess I do have a thing for blondes.
Nancy: [trembles]
Vanessa: Hey. Today’s our anniversary. Our first kiss? It happened on Christmas Eve. Do you remember?
Nancy: ...Yes. Yes, I remember.
Vanessa: [sighs softly]
[both panting heavily]
[door creaks open]
Nancy: [voice cracks] Y-yes?
Geoffrey: The photographer is here.
Nancy: [clears throat] Right.
[silence]
Vanessa: I should get going.
Nancy: What? No, you don’t have to spend the holiday alone.
Vanessa: I’ll be alright. Besides, what’s another year?
Nancy: [murmurs] I can come with you. I can grab my purse and-
Vanessa: [smirks] It’s fine, Nancy. Enjoy your party. Enjoy your family. There’s always tomorrow. I promise.
Geoffrey: It’s uh, it’s nice having Vanessa around, isn’t it?
Nancy: [smiles weakly] Yes. Yes, it is. Would you like a drink? I think I’ll need two before dealing with the press.
Geoffrey: Sure. Yeah. A drink is nice.
371 notes · View notes
choccy-milky · 7 days ago
Note
I dont know why I had this vision of clora riding a scooter, like a cute light blue one with italy vibes, like a vespa, and sebastian panicking behind her LMAO
I SEE THE VISION AS WELL...idk how shes on a vespa tho since they werent invented yet so lets just assume theres time-turner shenanigans going on LMAO
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but also anon this request was so funny to me because the SAME day you sent me it, i also got this one on twitter:
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TRULY THE DUALITY OF MAN IS AT PLAY HERE!!! LMAOO debauchery vs wholesomeness...and it made me laugh so much
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(and for anyone curious yes i WILL also be honouring the other request......eventually👀)
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@jstfndmthngs splitting your ask into 2 again bc its a CHONKER but I LOVED READING IT🥹🥹 "how much they love each other to the abnormal level that i envy" LMAOO THATS FANFICTION FOR YOU, BABY!!😍 also YESS interacting with my readers in the comments was my fav parts of writing a lot of the time, and im SOOO grateful to the ppl who commented bc without them the story would have turned out DRASTICALLY DIFFERENT. like, i know there are some people who write the entirety of their fanfic and then upload it in chunks, but if i had done that/written my story in a vacuum and hadnt incorporated any of my readers ideas/suggestions it would have been SOOOO much worse honestly LMAO. like, not even necessarily putting their requests or ideas in my fic, but even sometimes just reading a comment that would say something like "i cant wait to see how clora/seb reacts to..." would make me think...oh. i was never planning on even showing their reaction to that. but now that they say that, good point, i definitely need to include that LOL. so yeah even just little stuff like that was SUPER important to my writing process and my story and helped me keep in mind what people wanted to see/things i may have missed or glossed over if i'd been writing by myself, but i also just loved getting comments in general bc i loved reading them and they were so motivating🥹 BUT THANK U SO MUCH IM GLAD U LIKED MY STORY/SEB & CLORA SO MUCH, AND TY FOR SHARING ALL YOUR THOUGHTS WITH ME!!🥹💖💖 im lowkey the same way... i cant read any other fics rn bc im still too attached to seb/clora BAHAHA so i still need to give it some time before i delve into other HL fics (i even downloaded a program that will let me replace names so that i can replace the mc's name with clora's LMFAOOOO THATS HOW MENTALLY ILL I AM ABOUT THEM!!😭😭DONT COME FOR ME🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🚓)
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omg...i already love unlocking kinks in people but for it to be specifically seb x clora is even more of an honour BAHAHA omg i love that....but i get it too. clora is submissive and breedable af😍LMAOO (im sorry💀that wasnt me just now that was seb blame him)
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@acrenna MERRY LATE CHRISTMAS AND ALSO LATE HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! this is so sweet THANK YOU SO MUCH😭😭im happy my story was able to get you out of your reading slump!! (and hopefully will continue to, with my oneshot im slowly but surely working on😩) BUT THANK YOU AGAIN I APPRECIATE YOU SM🥹🥹💖
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@misskkfritz you actually arent the first to say this and i also saw a pinterest comment on my art say this........FELLAS DO I NEED TO WATCH GILMORE GIRLS NOW🤔🤔🤔
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Text
Hope for Christmas
Spill it, Buck," Maddie said.
"Well, you know how I've always kind of been a go big or go home guy?" Buck asked.
"Yes, I have met you," Maddie said dryly.
"Well, I kind of bought Tommy's Christmas present before the breakup, and it's non-refundable, so I was thinking I could gift it to you and Chim."
"What's the gift?" Maddie asked, curiosity piqued.
"Uh, an all-inclusive vacation to Cabo..." Buck's voice trailed off, waiting for her reaction.
"Buck," Maddie said, her voice softening.
Buck took a deep breath. "It was going to be perfect. I'd planned everything - private villa, sunset dinners, couples' massage. I talked to his captain and arranged his schedule. I wanted it to be this big, romantic gesture that showed Tommy how serious I was about us."
"Call him," Maddie said.
"What?" Buck said, confusion evident in his tone.
"Call him," Maddie repeated, simple and direct.
"Mads. I can't do that. We broke up. He dumped me," Buck said, his voice heavy with hurt.
"So? It was meant to be a gift, right? You don't have to do all the romantic stuff, but you still like each other, right?" Maddie said, her tone practical and hopeful.
"No, Maddie," Buck said quietly. "I don't just like him. I love him. I am in love with him."
Maddie's expression softened. "So call him. Not to get back together. Just...as friends. As people who care about each other."
Buck hesitated, his fingers already unconsciously tracing the outline of his phone in his pocket. "What would I even say?"
"Hey, I bought this trip before we broke up. Want a free vacation?" Maddie suggested with a hint of a smile.
"That's your brilliant plan?" Buck raised an eyebrow.
"Sometimes the simplest approach works best," she said. "You're overthinking it. Just reach out."
Buck took a deep breath. His hand shook slightly as he picked up the phone.
"It's ringing," Buck whispered, his voice barely audible. Maddie gave him a thumbs up and silently slipped away.
"Go for Kinard," Tommy answered, his tone professional and guarded.
"Hey...hey...uh, Tommy. It's Evan Buckley," Buck stammered, each word feeling like it was being pulled from him.
Tommy tried to laugh, but it was unnatural sounding, his discomfort apparent even over the phone."Well hello, Evan Buckley. This is a surprise. What can I do for you?"
"Well uh..." Buck took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. "It's Christmas and I got you a gift before we broke up. And I want to give it to you but it's complicated."
"Complicated how?" Tommy asked curiously.
"Well...I kind of got you a trip to Cabo...with me...and well it's non-refundable and I know you have the time off because I kind of arranged it with your captain back in November before well...you know. So the trip is yours if you want it. You can take anyone you want-" Buck rambled, the words tumbling out in a nervous rush.
"Buck, wow, that's so thoughtful," Tommy said, genuine surprise softening his previously guarded tone.
"Yeah well...you deserve it," Buck said softly.
"Come with me?" Tommy asked.
"Are you sure? That could be weird," Buck responded, uncertainty threading through his words.
"I still want you in my life, Buck," Tommy said.
"On one condition..." Buck said, a hint of playfulness emerging.
"What's that?" Tommy asked.
"Never call me Buck again," he replied, a hint of a laugh threading through words that were undeniably serious.
"I promise, Evan," Tommy said, his voice sincere.
"Well, I guess we're going on vacation," Buck replied, the words full of nervous energy catching in his throat.
"Yeah, I guess we are," Tommy said, his tone a vulnerable mix of cautious optimism and uncertainty.
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seeingivy · 12 days ago
Note
the tortured poets event is sick bc how am i supposed to choose just ONE 😭😭 gimme everything 💳💥💥💳💥💳💳💳💥💥💳💥 okay what about "no im not coming to my senses" with gojo... 🫣 that annoying ass man 😪
no i'm not coming to my senses x satoru gojo
**part of my tortured poets concert event
--
“y/n. why are you kissing santa claus?” 
the sound of the little feet pattering into the kitchen sends an instant wave of regret down your spine, as you pull back, your hands still warm on satoru’s shoulders as you turn to your left. and without fail, the nocturnal prince, megumi fushiguro, is standing at your side, looking up at you with curious eyes. 
“megumi! you…you’re still awake?” you ask. 
it’s a rather daft question to ask. only because he’s obviously awake, obviously awake because he’s standing right in front of you, where he’s just caught you kissing satoru, still clad in his silly santa claus outfit that he insisted on wearing for christmas eve. 
megumi gives you a small nod, before his eyes suspiciously dart back and forth between you and satoru. out of your peripheral vision, you can see that the latter is very pleased with himself, mostly in the fact that most of the tricks he had planned earlier in the night, the ones that he took far too much effort in organizing despite your warnings, had actually worked. 
megumi really believed that santa claus was real. 
satoru gojo had a natural aptitude to take things a little too seriously. most of the times, a little too far. naturally, the first christmas that megumi and tsumiki were going to spend with you was not an event that he was going to spare or take lightly, at least not without a decent amount of fanfare first.  
what started as an innocent trip to the mall to find matching pajamas left with satoru buying the pair a new wardrobe of designer items, despite your insistence that they wouldn’t really be too fond of them. he figured that toji fushiguro had never bothered to buy the two of them presents, so him buying the obscene amount was justified as he was simply just catching up. 
and while the gifts were mostly innocuous, the entire ordeal that he had planned for christmas eve was the cherry on top. it involved robbing you of your sleep so that the two of you could eat half of the cookies that tsumiki and megumi left out, to imprint little hooves into the yard and footsteps leading up to the tree, and stuffing the stockings that you had purposely left empty for the past two weeks to paint a perfect picture. 
except, satoru gojo refused to stuff the stockings in his own clothes, because according to him, the eyes in the back of megumi’s head would catch him in the act. and if it meant that he had to buy a whole costume to prove his point, it was the very least he would do. 
“are you cheating on gojo sensei?” 
“no! of course, i’m not cheating on satoru.” 
satoru shoots up out of his chair, his hand firm on your shoulder, as he leans down and shoots megumi a pointed smile.
“yes! of course, she is.” satoru responds. 
you shoot satoru a confused look. he doesn’t relent in the slightest, from whatever shitty game it is that he’s playing, and instead opts to give you a peachy smile, before pushing your hands off of his shoulders. 
“she’s been naughty this year.” he responds. 
“what? no, i haven’t. satoru’s just…” 
“who’s satoru? i’m santa claus.” satoru seethes. 
megumi gives you a shrug, before padding out of the room, as you shove satoru and whisper under your breath.
“what the hell?” you whisper. 
“what?” 
“you…you can’t just tell him that i’m cheating on you.” you state. 
“well, i can’t exactly tell him that i’m dressed up as santa claus either, can i?” satoru responds. 
“oh my god, satoru. get your priorities straight. come to your senses a little bit this…this is insane.” 
“no, i’m not coming to my senses. he has to believe in santa, this is important. this is the pinnacle of childhood itself.” he murmurs. 
you pinch the bridge of your nose, the two of you pushing away from one another as megumi pads back into the room, a jacket slung over his shoulders. 
“can we drink hot chocolate?” he asks. 
“sure we can. i’ll put it on right now.” you murmur, lifting him up so that he’s sitting on the counter by satoru. 
you shoot him a glare, one that’s enough of a warning that he needs to retract what it is that he’s just said, as you reach for the fridge. 
“so. about what you saw.” satoru starts. 
“you were kissing, y/n.” 
“no, i wasn’t. she had something in her eye.” 
megumi frowns. 
“well, you said yipee after, so i hardly doubt that’s true.” 
you swallow down your snort. 
“that was a joke. i was just…trying to make her laugh…but that’s besides the point.” 
“why are you trying to make her laugh if she’s being naughty? that doesn’t really make any sense, does it?” megumi deadpans. 
you place the glass of steaming hot chocolate next to megumi, taking one chance to ruffle his hair, before reaching for your own cup. satoru makes a move on your mug, leaning just close enough to beckon for a sip, as you shake your head at him. 
“what gives?” he asks. 
“i don’t share my drinks with strangers, santa.” 
“oh. right. well. i’ll just be on my way out then. have gifts i have to deliver. because you know…i’m santa and all.” 
you shoot satoru a peachy smile. 
“off you go.” you gesture. 
satoru gives you a confused look, before mouthing to you when megumi’s busy looking away. 
really? 
you give him a nod in response, watching as he very begrudgingly scoots his way out of the hallway, accompanied by a very loud slamming of the door as he leaves. you turn to megumi, who gives you a rather blank expression. 
“does he really think i’m stupid enough to believe in santa claus? or that you’d cheat on him?” 
“evidently so.” 
megumi rolls his eyes. 
“how long do you think it will take him to come back?” megumi asks. 
you shake your head. 
“he’s far too committed to the bit now. my guess is breakfast.” 
“dinner.” megumi states. 
you lean back against the counter. 
“ten bucks?” you ask. 
“deal.”
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monstacheol · 16 days ago
Text
୨⎯ “𝓛𝓾𝓷𝓬𝓱” ⎯୧
Pairing: Seungcheol x Afab! Reader // genre: smut
A.N.: Is this a sign that I am back? I finish school and I will soon be getting my associate's degree. Maybe. Just kidding, I am. 😭 Thank you for the long wait and I hope you like this attempt at a drabble that I have written, as I know it is terrible 😭. I do, however, get on now and then and check on stuff and I'm close to 400 followers and I don’t know what to do. I'm already working on Gift from a God Pt. 2 (Yes. That is happening after so long). As always, like, comment, and reblog for support and improvement. Take this awful short story as a Christmas gift. I didn’t grammar check so I’m so sorry. 😭 Please Enjoy and Merry Christmas.
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You knew he was craving something for lunch, but you didn't expect you to be the one he was craving. You were just making a simple lunch in the kitchen as he returned from a business meeting. There he was, looking so attractive in the suit he wore. He took that one look, instantly walked over to you, and pulled you into his arms, his lips pressing heavily against yours.
So here we are, in the kitchen, him on his knee, tie loose on his neck, your apron loose and the strap hanging off the side of your shoulder, your shorts discarded on the floor beside him and your panties pulled to the side as he deliciously eats your sweet, delicious cunt, savoring every taste and moan that escapes your lips.
And GOD...The way your taste dances on his tongue drives him crazy. He can't help it. He needs you every day to satisfy him. It didn't matter where—the bed, the table, the couch, or, in this case, the kitchen counter. He craves your flavor, no matter the location. And how can he not? Your taste is irresistible, just sweet like honey, a sinful indulgence he can never get enough of. And the way you beautifully arch your back and grip his hair only fuels his desire for you, driving him to want to devour every inch of your body with an insatiable hunger. He knows your body well and knows exactly how to make you moan and writhe with pleasure. With every flick, every trace of his tongue, and every stripe his tongue made as he licked your pussy from top to bottom, you were driven insane. He revels in the way you respond to his touch, your body trembling with desire beneath him.
And right when he sucked hard on that sensitive nub, shaking his head side to side, you couldn't take it. You couldn't hold back anymore. You exhaled a gasp of pleasure, your hands clutching the counter's edge as you surrendered to the overwhelming sensation. Your body quivered with ecstasy, your mind consumed by the intense pleasure he had given you as he swallowed every drop of your essence, savoring the taste of your pleasure as he looked up at you with a satisfied look, knowing he had brought you to the brink and beyond. You sat there, partially catching your breath, as he placed one final kiss on your throbbing clit, causing your body to jolt before moving up your body and laying kisses on your neck.
"Cheol," you whine, making him chuckle in your neck.
"I can't help myself. I just get so... hungry when I see you." He murmurs against your skin. His lips trailed up to yours and kissed you deeply, allowing you a taste of your sweetness as his tongue entangled with you. Your body responded eagerly to his touch, craving more of his insatiable hunger for you. So slightly, you backed away from the kiss.
"Cheol," you responded as he hummed into your cheek, laying open-mouth kisses down your neck. "Don't you need to get back to work?" you asked, gasping.
"I cleared my whole schedule today. No one will interrupt us," he whispers against your lips, his hands wandering down your body with a hunger that matches his words. "Beside," he continued.
He grins mischievously, biting his bottom lip with his teeth as he leans in close. His lips ghosted over yours.
"Daddy is still hungry. What do you say? Can I have another taste?"
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aboutchriss · 18 days ago
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walk with me
Pairing: idol!BangChan x fem! reader
Genre: fluff
Warnings: chan being a cutie patootie with berry, reader is 22
Author notes: idk, okay?. i'm bored trying to avoid my relatives that are here for the chirstams holidays...please save me...i wrote this to...escape from this house, i hope you appreciate it. i'll probably do a part 2, it's 2:30 a.m here so yeah, and of course it's not proof read! (i'll read it tomorrow) oh and wear sunscreen my kids!!
💌
remember! english it's not my first language, please be gentle with me! let me know if there's any mistastake
💌
requests are open, especially on Christmas!
It's the perfect day in Sydney; the temperature is on point—not too cold, not too hot. It's the right temperature to wear a sundress and a little jumper that you probably won't use because you want to tan before the holidays, even if you want to tan though, you put sunscreen on and lay down on a beach towel in a public park, the grass is green and you can hear kids screaming and laughing while they're playing with a big grasshopper and any sort of insects, you have a book inside your purse, and cold tea, it's a daydream.
As you lay on the grass, something warm and wet touches your cheek—once, twice. When you open your eyes, you find a small, maybe a little fat dog with a smile on it's face (yes, dogs can smile). You sit down, looking around to find the dog's owner, and there he is the most beautiful, gorgeous man you have ever seen in your entire existence, is it possible? Are you having a heat stroke? He has dark brown curls, the kind of curls you can touch until you fall asleep, he's trying to hide a smile but you can see dimples on his cheeks, he has broad shoulders and big hands, and he looks like a damn Disney prince, are you daydreaming? What the fuck it's happening? "I am so sorry miss" He says in a muffled laugh
did he just called me miss, how old is he? 44? no, that's not possible, he's too beautiful to be this old
"oh, no worries -you giggle- i don't mind kisses from a gorgeous dog like her? are you a she or a he mh?" you say, now talking to the dog that is laying comortably on your lap
"oh uhm, she, her name it's berry" he says touching his ear
"Berry huh? what a pretty name" you rub her hear
"well i guess she's comfy there, 'm sorry, she's old and when she lays down somewhere well...umh - he touches the nape of his neck- she stays there for a while" he says looking right into your eyes
"oh, no worries...if you're free we can wait till she gets up" you say patting the place next to you on the beach towel
he smiles and you can finally see his dimples, and boom we're so fucked up y/n.
"your mom didn't teach you to not talk to strangers? i might be a serial killer" he says sitting down next to you
"what about your mom? -you echo- maybe i'm the serial killer" you smile at him
"touchè" he laughs
"i'm Christopher by the way, you can call me Chris or Chan" he says offering his hand
a veiny and big hand
"i'm y/n - you grab his hand and shake it- nice to meet you Christopher" he laughs
"are you from Sydney?" he asks caressing Berry that is still sleeping on your lap
"oh no, i work here, nothing more, what about you?" you say
"I was born and raised here, but i work in Korea, i'm here for the christmas holidays" he explains (not that you can hear something since your too focused on his thick lips, thanks god you're wearing sunglasses)
"Korea mh? and what do you do? CEO in a company? Actor? or you cook kimchi for stray cats?" you ask caressing Berry
he laughs and it feels like the sun just exploded
"I- uh- i'm an idol, nothing special" he shrugs
"an idol?" you echo
"mhmm, i have a group and we sing and dance and stuff like that" he says smiling
oh this dude really loves his job
"stuff like that mh? and are you famous?" you ask caressing Berry's head
"what about you? what do you do?" he asks
"uuuh, you're avoiding the question...is that a yes? you're famous!" you say giggling
"shhhh, i'm not, i promise i'm not that famous" he says
"oh...okay..." you look at him trying to see his eyes through his sun glasses
"so...what do you do?" he asks again, caressing Berry's head
"i-uh i work in a library, i own it actually...it's not that interesting" you say
"so you read a lot?" he asks
"i do, actually" you say smiling
"and what's your favorite genre?" he asks caressing Berry's body, his fingers brushing against your thigh
"i-do you want the real answer or?" you giggle
"of course i do!"
"smut"
"smut?" he echos
"yes, porn in books, smut, call it how you prefer" you say shrugging
"interesting" he nods
"do you want to grab a coffee with me?" he suddenly asks
"mh? you want to grab a coffee with me?" you ask
"yeah, with you and well berry, even if she might be the third wheel" he giggles
"okay"
"you don't have if you don't want to, i just asked because you're really cute and yeah i want to know you better" he spits out in one breath
"Christopher i said okay, let's go. I need to know more about your job and i won't leave Berry 'till you make me listen one of your songs, but before we go can i put sunscreen on your face? you burnt your nose" you try not to laugh
"oh? really?" he touches his nose
"mhmm -you nod- may i?" you asked
"sure, go on" he says lifting up his sunglasses
"tell me if i hurt you okay?" you say as you squeeze sunscreen on the tips of your fingers, putting it on his nose in the most delicate way possible
"you're kind you know?"
"i know" you smile
"i feel like a kid...wait i -he grab your hands gently- how old are you?" he asks
"old enough Christopher, don't worry" you smile
"i'm serious how old are you?" he asks
"i'm 22, and you?"
"i'm 27" he sighs and let go of your hands
"damn, what a sigh" you giggle
"i feel like a grandpa" he says
"you're not a grandpa Christopher, not with this body"
"oh-...thanks" he says is it the sun or is he blushing?
"okay, let's go, and by the way, you can't threat me with my dog" he says, getting up, grabbing berry from your lap and offering his hand to you
"what a gentleman! and that wasn't a threat, i just want to...listen to what you do okay?" you say grabbing his hand to get up and fuck he's also tall, and bigger than you expected
"of course i'm a gentleman. and yes, she's my baby, i would do anything for her, even embarassing my self in front of the most beautiful woman in this park with my songs" he says looking at you
"oh-" he giggles
is he flirting?
"come on, i know a good place for a coffee and maybe lunch?" he asks
"i'm right behind you" yeah right behind you staring at your fifty pounds of ass
"you know that my eyes are up here right?" fuck
"no, yeah i know, i was looking for my...purse...yeah my purse"
"liar" he says laughing and you push his back
"shut the fuck up, you've been staring at my boobs the whole time!" you say and he turns around to look at you
"i-did not- okay maybe a little okay? wait...you can see my eyes through the sunglasses" he asks looking down at you
"i do...you can see mine?" you ask
"i do"
"good than we're both idiots"
"maybe a little" he giggles
"come on, let's go we have a 10 minutes walk and berry is heavy"
"ugh, big arms for nothing" you mumble
"i could pick you up with one hand and throw you around if i wanted too" he says walking straight, he and his stupid fucking aura
"damn okay, sorry"
-
ten minutes later you're at the cafe, it's cute and cozy and the sandwiches on display looks yummy, and the man in front of you looks yummy; he took off his sunglasses now and you can finally see his eyes in a decent light, simply brown boba eyes, and you can clearly tell that he is a good man just by looking at his eyes. his eyes are also eating you alive, but again this is another story.
182 notes · View notes
janeyseymour · 2 months ago
Text
I Hate You, I Love You- part 4
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
Summary: Christmas Eve with your family leads you to have a certain revelation.
WC: ~2.5k
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You and your ‘girlfriend’ make it down the steps with your fingers interlaced, and you seriously hate the way that it makes you feel things that you know you shouldn’t be feeling for Melissa. You hate her- or you’re supposed to. No, you do. You have to. You always have, and you always will. 
Still, you walk down the steps with a practiced ease. Nobody is here yet though, so you take a spot on the couch with your dad while Melissa opts to kiss your cheek and let you know that she’s going to see if there’s any last minute jobs in the kitchen. Your eyes once again linger on the red haired woman’s hips as she makes her way into the kitchen.
Your father coughs awkwardly to gain your attention.
“Hm?”
“Kid, you really have it bad for her, don’t you?” your dad chuckles.
You shrug. “I don’t know.”
“I think you do,” he leans over and wraps an arm around you. You can’t but lean into his embrace. “I haven’t seen anyone look at you like that, and I haven’t seen you look at anyone the way you do Melissa since…”
“Since Todd,” you whisper. Your dad nods silently. You look to him with vulnerable eyes. “She’s… she’s something alright.”
“In the best ways, yes?” your father prompts quietly.
You just nod, and then your ‘girlfriend’ is making her way into the room, yet another glass of wine in hand for you. She settles in next to you on the couch, drapes an arm around you, and rests her head on your shoulder.
“Mom didn’t have anything for you to do in there?” you ask her quietly as you kiss red hair.
“Her and Jo are flying around like chickens with their heads cut off in there. I figured I would be more of a hindrance than a help,” Melissa chuckles softly.
It’s a bit later that your family comes in, and you’re forced to introduce Melissa as your girlfriend to everyone there. She smiles and shakes hands, works her charm, and you can tell that your family is loving having the redhead there. You’re given quite a few impressive hums and thumbs ups as your family makes their way in. The redhead stays close to you as your family members come in. Her hand is always on some part of your body, whether that be on your back, your shoulder, or your hands are entwined. You don’t hate it.
Light conversation is made, just pleasantries and catching up on life at first as everyone makes their way in. You don’t engage much, trying to keep Melissa in the loop with who is who.
But then you settle in for dinner, Melissa on your right, and most eyes turn to you.
“What?” you ask with a raised brow. “Is there something you all know that I don’t?”
Your Uncle Ron laughs. “Kid, I think it’s that you know something the rest of us don’t.” When you give him a blank stare in return, he gestures to Melissa.
“I already introduced you all to her,” you roll your eyes. “This is Melissa, my girlfriend.”
“And?” you Aunt Betty prompts. “How did you meet? When did you realize you two had a thing for each other? How long have the two of you been dating? You know, other stuff like that?”
“Am I being interrogated?” you question with a brow raised, the other furrowed. When your family just continues to look at you with bated breath, you huff out, “You guys are ridiculous.”
Melissa playfully rolls her eyes and sets a gentle hand on your knee. “C’mon, babe. If you won’t tell ‘em, I will.”
Both of your eyebrows creep up your forehead, and you gesture for her to continue. “Be my guest, hun.”
So Melissa takes a breath and begins. “I started workin’ at Abbott a while ago… longer ago than I really care t’admit. An’ I really only had a couple of friends at work. Nobody really seemed worthy of getting to know. Until… Y/N. I usually hate newbies, and I wasn’t willing to make an exception for my new grade level partner, but there was something about her. Something in the way that she stood up for what she thought was right, the way she speaks to the children and holds them to the highest expectations while still providing them with unconditional love and care. Somehow, Y/N wormed her way into my heart- as a professional. And then slowly, as she started to let more of herself shine through, I found myself entranced with her.” Green eyes are trained on you, and you can see the amount of love she has for you- fake love. “I found myself slowly fallin’ for her.”
She presses a soft kiss to your cheek, and you have to cough awkwardly to let out the gasp that your body wants to release. She said those words in such a convincing way that you almost believe her. Unbeknownst to you, her words are genuine. 
“And when did the two of you finally get your heads out of your asses and start dating?” your father asks.
“It took a while, but I broke down her walls, walls I would usually have up myself. But we’ve been dating since almost the beginning of this school year when I finally just made a move, and I haven’t been happier,” Melissa tells your family as she continues to look at you in a lovesick way. “I ain’t lettin’ her go any time soon.”
The blush in your cheeks is clear now. You smile and press a quick kiss to her lips before sighing. “Enough about us though.” And then you turn your attention to your cousin and her new job.
Melissa insists on helping clean up dinner and bring out desserts. Of course she does, because she’s the perfect fake girlfriend. Maybe she isn’t though, because that means that you’re obligated to help. You don’t do much- you never do much to help clean up after a day of cooking. So instead, you keep your arms around your ‘girlfriend’s’ waist and rest your chin on her back. Every so often, you’ll kiss her shoulder blade or detach yourself briefly to take a sip of the sangria she had poured for you.
Before you can even think about going to the dessert table for the two of you, the redhead has taken it upon herself to make you up a plate, and she takes some for herself. She knows that you prefer to have tea with your dessert as opposed to coffee that is normally offered. Melissa saunters over to the teapot and fills it with hot water for you. In no time flat do you have your favorite desserts and a warm mug of chai tea to warm your already soothed soul.
But then everything is cleaned, desserts are handed out to the rest of your family, and you’re settling on the couch again. Melissa sits first, and then she practically tugs you into her lap. It’s warm, it’s cozy. You can’t deny that your bodies fit together well.
She seamlessly places herself into your family, and you hate it. You hate the fact that she knows just what to say and do to win over your family. You hate that she’s warm and loving, and she’s being the exact opposite of the woman you know. You sit quietly with her as she jokes with your cousins, completely lost in thought. There was something about the way that your father told you that you had it bad for the redhead next to you and the looks that she was giving you at dinner. Your whole body tenses as you realize: you just might be falling for this side of Melissa.
“Hun?” the redhead furrows her brow and turns to you, concerned. “You okay?”
Of course she would notice the rigidness in your body. You blink a few times before putting on that practiced easy smile of yours. “Yeah, just got a chill.”
“I can fix that.” Your colleague shifts you off of her slightly before standing and fetching a blanket from the bin. She settles back into the cushions before draping the throw over the two of you. For good measure, she pulls you in close, wrapping her arms around you, and kisses your head. “Can’t have my girl cold, now can I?”
Your favorite cousin just glances at you with a smirk, and then she looks at Melissa and makes a whip noise. Your ‘girlfriend’ scoffs, but she presses another kiss to your head as you rest it on her shoulder.
It’s a long while before you finally decide that you need some sleep. Christmas morning may be a lazy morning in your house, but it’s always an early morning. 
With a soft sigh, you turn to the redhead next to you. “You about ready to head up?”
“Yeah, if you are,” she mumbles into your hair.
The two of you climb the steps, and you’re oddly quiet as you prepare for bed. Once all of your makeup is washed away and you’re changed, Melissa is already in bed with her glasses on the tip of her nose and scrolling through her phone.
You crawl under the covers and sigh deeply.
“Penny for your thoughts?” your colleague asks you softly.
You hum. You can’t tell her that your mind is whirling with thoughts of how you may actually be falling for this side of her- not the real Melissa, but this fake Melissa that she’s come up with for this elaborate lie of yours. “Just tired. Today was a lot.”
“Yeah,” the redhead chuckles. “But your family is real nice, and I think they believe we’re together.”
You just nod and turn on your side facing away from her. “Night.”
“Goodnight,” Melissa tells you. You don’t see the way that she looks at you longingly. You don’t see the way that her eyes go soft as she glances at you laying in bed next to her, how her green orbs clearly convey that she wants to wrap her arms around you and hold you tight the way that she has been all night. No, your back is turned to her as your mind goes a mile a minute thinking about what you think you may be feeling.
You feel the redhead shift to lay down in the bed a few minutes later, and the glow of her phone disappears as she sets it on the nightstand. A couple seconds later you hear her glasses being folded and deposited next to her phone.
Melissa lays down in the bed on her side, but she’s facing you. It’s not her fault, that’s just how she’s always slept- on her right side. And it’s not like you know she’s facing you. It takes everything in her to not cozy up behind you and pull you against her. Instead, she closes her eyes and hopes that she doesn’t snore tonight.
When you’re certain the redhead beside you is asleep, breathing evenly, you turn as gently as you can in the bed to face her. She’s… she’s beautiful. She looks so at peace. There’s a lot of things you can say about Melissa Schemmenti, but unattractive is not one of those things. In this moment, you can allow yourself to daydream about what a life with this version of Melissa might be like- she’s treated you like a princess since getting to your parents’ house, a far cry from how she acts around you at Abbott.
As you drift off to sleep, the cliched sugar plum fairies don’t dance around in your head. No, instead you dream of what you think might be an ordinary day with Melissa in your life as your partner, and not just your fake one.
The two of you share a wonderful, homemade breakfast together in her house, she drives you to work, kisses are stolen in the break room and in the classroom. And while she still has the edge to her that Miss Schemmenti has, there’s still that sparkle of the warmth that she’s shown you she has outside of work. You find that when she makes a snarky comment in your dream, you don’t hate it. You don’t even dislike it. You can hear yourself chuckling in your dream. That image blurs into another, and you’re just laying on the couch. A shimmer catches your eye as you lay on her, hand resting on her collarbone. There’s a sparkling ring set on your finger. When you look down, there’s a matching one on her own left hand. You hear a baby crying from just up the way, and you sigh. 
Melissa just buries a kiss in your hair. “I got it if she doesn’t settle in the next five minutes.” When the crying doesn’t stop, your… is she your wife now in this dream? Your wife shimmies you off of her and heads up the steps. A few moments later, she returns with a little girl in her arms, one that is a spitting image of you.
“Oh honey,” you instinctively reach for the two year old, at least that’s where you would estimate she is in age.
“Baby girl just wanted Momma,” Melissa rolls her eyes playfully. “Never Ma, always Momma, ain’t that right, Sara?”
The little girl just gives a toothy grin as she lays her head on your shoulders.
You sit upright in the bed as your dream jolts you awake. Your heart is racing. Why were you married to Melissa? Why did you have a child together? What the fuck? The redhead beside you doesn’t so much as stir, still fast asleep. The breath is taken from your lungs as you realize: you’re actually falling for Melissa Schemmenti.
When you wake up for the second time that day, you once again wake with a jolt. Your arms are wound around Melissa’s waist, your face is buried in her chest, your limbs are intertwined with hers. Her arm is slung over your own body.
The woman next to you just groans and pulls you closer. You can’t deny that she’s warm. You can’t deny that you don’t hate waking up like this. It’s comfortable, and you don’t wake up freezing your ass off for once.
“Lis,” you mumble.
“Shut up, and go back to sleep,” she grumbles. She buries a kiss in your hair. Okay, you know she’s still half asleep. She wouldn’t do that if she was fully awake and it was just the two of you. And while her telling you to shut up would normally infuriate you to no end, you don’t seem to mind this time. You settle back into her hold with a soft sigh and allow your eyes to flutter shut again. Christmas morning and presents can wait if it means you'll get some extra time in the warmth of your colleague.
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moonlight-records · 1 month ago
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Christmas via letters| OP81 (HAC #10)
pairing: op81 x reader
summary: after you break your phone and waiting to buy a new one, you decide the only logical way to contact your boyfriend is via letter for the holiday season.
warning: fluff!
fc: none!
wc: ??
a/n: I FINALLY CAUGHT UP!!! day 10 of moonlight records holiday advent calendar!
day 1 | day 2 | day 3 | day 4 | day 5 | day 6 | day 7 | day 8 | day 9 | current day | day 11
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My dearest Oscar,
Oh my dear, Oscar, I do hope this letter finds you well. How these are very troubling times we have entered. I write this letter to you in the darkest of nights as slumber is near impossible. With you thousands of kilometers away my bed is so terribly big and empty and I am so terribly cold when I’m not in your embrace. Oh how I long for your embrace and to see your handsome face again.
Seriously though, hi babe! Did you like that opening? I hope so because that opening put a LOT of brain cells to work and we both know that I typically never have the brain cells. Now, you’re probably wondering why the hell am I sending you a letter when we can text or video call even though you barely answer your mom or me though since you’re always napping or flirting with Lando or Logan but I’m letting that go right now.
I am so glad you asked because my phone is…broken!! Isn’t that SO fun?! Before you ask, I am already one step ahead of you. Imagine it: a cold, bitter, and rainy Tuesday morning. I’m heading to class. Am I running late to class? Yes. Was it because I got myself a sweet treat? I am just a girl babe, just a girl. Anyway, I am making up for a great time and I will be early to my 8:30 class. Well, about that. I’m looking at my phone and I trip over my feet. Phone goes into a pothole puddle and is completely ruined so I have to wait till my next paycheck to buy a new one while trading in my old phone to get like a piss poor discount off my new phone.
I think I sent you a message on Instagram and TikTok from my laptop about it. I forgot that you aren’t on social media often like me which is very valid so I decided to send you a letter! Besides, I’ve always wanted to write Christmas letters but nobody I know wants to write letters anymore so you, my most loyal subject, are going to write Christmas letters with me! If you want, that is but I hope you do! Unless you want to be on social media to talk to your totally amazing, beautiful, funny girlfriend because I would not complain about that. Maybe you’d finally look at all those super funny cat memes I keep sending you! Well, hope to hear from you soon love
With much love,  Y/N
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My sweetest Y/N, 
I will not be talking in the 19th century. I don’t think I can do justice compared to you but I can confirm that this letter has found me well and I will cherish it deeply.
Listen babe, you knew that when you decided to accept the first date you gained a very sleepy and polite cat from what the fans are deeming me. This should not be a surprise to you or my mom. Though I am not ignoring your text messages to flirt with Lando! Babe, how could you ever think that I would do such a thing? Lando is just a dork that needs constant supervision. Now Logan, on the other hand…babe that is my emotional support American. Are you telling me I CAN’T flirt with my emotional support American? Come on Y/N, you should’ve known that when you said yes to being my girlfriend that it was me AND Logan. We are obviously a package deal.
You dropped your phone in a pothole puddle? That’s…disgusting oh my god. I actually almost gagged at the thought of you reaching into the puddle to grab your phone. No wonder why my phone hasn’t been blowing up as much, babe I am so sorry. Both about your phone being ruined but also for my lack of checking in. Honestly I’ve just been recharging socially to answer emails and stuff. It’s taking much longer since you’re not here to cuddle me…still not an excuse. I wanna emphasize that I’m not excusing my lack of check in for the past few days. Promise to get better on that.
You know what, when you get your new phone, I will not only have opened all your wonderful videos but I’ll even send some back. Just you watch. Though in the meantime since you do want to send letters this holiday season, I guess we can so, do you have anything fun planned for the holiday season?
Sincerely, Oscar Piastri
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Dear Oscar,
You answered!! Oh my god, baby you don’t know how excited I am for this. Also god, please do not remind me about the puddle. The thought still makes me shudder and gag. Though babe, you know me. I am not upset at all with you not answering all the time because it doesn’t really upset me. You know that because I know that you answer when I really need you to, which is like once in a blue moon. Like when I got the flat that one time and you so graciously got me an uber home. That was like what? Three months ago? Besides that, babe, show me a sign of life and I’m content for the day. Though are you admitting that Logan gets more attention than me? I might have to find our dating contract and revise that I get equal amount sir sleepy Piastri. But you’ll send me silly Tiktoks?! Oh Oscar, if you want to marry me, you should just ask me but this is so much better.
Oh! I don’t know. I’m helping mom this weekend decorate since it’s going to be the warmest weekend to handle the outside decorations. I’m going to attempt to help with the inside decorations since mom got grandpa’s Christmas village since we finally cleaned his house out. After that I’m kind of going with the flow, you know? Though mom has trusted me to do all the online shopping this year AKA she sends me screenshots and then tells me to order it with her credit card and hoard everything in my room, so. Eventually I will sit down one day and attempt to wrap though mom will probably redo it.
I know one day my friends want to go ice skating and see Wicked again. Now I am all for seeing Wicked again but ice skating? Babe, I fear if we go ice skating that you’ll get a call from me with all of us in the hospital. We can barely stand on our own two feet on a regular day and I know you’ve seen us. You know how clumsy my friends and I are but ‘tis the season, I guess!
Oh! We’re hosting Christmas this year, which will be very interesting. I mean, we got the space for sure but now that means fighting my cousin’s off so they don’t steal my plushies. Gotta defend ‘Mr. Artbag’ and ‘Sir Giggles’ you know? Do you have any plans for this upcoming holiday season?
Waiting for these cat memes, Y/N
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To my darling Y/N,
Oh my dearest Y/N, the thing about our dating contract is that it has sadly ended up with me back in Australia so you cannot have it. Though I am willing to revise the contract to make sure you get an equal amount of attention as Logan, though I need something in exchange. Luckily, I have found the contract and as I review our agreement, I think if I give you an equal amount of attention, you have to let me buy you one thing you want every month. Would you be willing to agree to those terms? I’ll throw in 5 cat memes a week free of charge.
Oh that’ll be fun. My sisters wanted to go shopping and since I haven’t seen them I decided to go with them. I really became the bag holder though I wasn’t that upset because I did manage to find some of your Christmas gifts and actually get them with the assistant of my sisters. AKA they asked me what I was looking for and they found it by some miracle. I wish I had that special touch to find things I need–like mothers do you know? Anyway, besides that I don’t know. Mom’s almost done decorating and dad got the tree since ours sadly broke (we’ve had it for almost 10 years, we needed a new one) and they already decorated the tree. Though I might take Rosie and Basil out to grab some gifts.
Wait, you guys are going ice skating? Well, surprise, I’m actually coming out to visit for a bit. Logan and Lando want to hang out before Logan heads back to the states for the holidays so if you guys could try to schedule that about two weeks later when I’m around, I would love to go with you guys, though I would ask if Lando and Logan could possibly join? I have no issue in becoming a personal ambulance, especially if Lando is going to go ice skating. Save us all.
What are you doing for New Years? If you’re not doing anything, mom and my sisters would love to have you over. They miss you and they’re going insane without you having a phone to text them life updates. To be honest, I also miss waking up to all your messages and memes and getting real time updates about your life. Can I buy you a phone? Please?
Hope you get your new phone soon, Oscar Piastri
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To the polite sleepy cat,
I talked to my lawyer about this new agreement in our contract and we have agreed to the terms you are requesting. Though I am not exactly happy with the terms about buying me one gift a month but you promise to send 5 cat memes so it’s fine. Though I will say, I am okay with it just being 5 memes a week free of charge if you cannot find any good cat memes. As long as it is a meme of any sorts I will overlook the buying me something for once a month.
Though on a serious note, YOU’RE COMING TO VISIT?! Oh my god, babe this is the best news I have ever heard. Yeah of course! I already asked the group and they would love to have Logan and Lando join us with ice skating! We were planning on getting dinner after if that’s okay with you guys? We’re not sure where we want to go yet but I’m sure we all can figure something out when we all meet up! Also, yes I made sure I was all bundled up, I’m not that crazy! Besides, I want to be able to smooth my dear boyfriend before the season starts without getting him in trouble for starting the new season a bit under the weather. 
Ha! Jokes on you, I already ordered my phone. I’m just waiting for it to ship because of course it wasn’t in stock when I went to get it in person. You know me, I just need a simple phone so I was going to get the same one as before. Sadly, it seems that my phone has become popular because they sold out in person! Oscar, do you know how devastated I was to venture out on my weekend to find out it’s out of stock? Truly, a dark day for me but my phone should be here before this letter is sent out. Promise that I’ll send you all my funny memes to make up for these lost times.
 As of right now, I don’t think I’m doing anything for New Years. I don’t know what the group wants to do yet but I think they’re all spending the holiday with their significant others so I would love to stay with you and the Piastri family! Are you kidding me? How else am I supposed to see Rosie and Basil? 
Well, this is probably coming around the holiday so, merry Christmas my love.
You’re probably napping, Y/N
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To the golden retriever,
Hopefully, this reaches you before I arrive. I’m glad to know that your lawyer agrees with these new terms. Do you accept memes via powerpoint presentations? I have taken some time out of my very very very busy schedule to compile a list of the top ten, not five but ten memes that I have seen this week that I believe you will enjoy. Most of them are from the same meme trending on TikTok but I think these stories are right up your alleyway along with some cat memes. 
I’m glad you were all bundled up. Not that I would personally care if I got sick if it meant getting my mandatory kisses and cuddles that I’ve been longing for. Any trouble is worth it if it’s so I can see you. I’ve spoken to Lando and Logan and they have agreed that planning for dinner would be the best. Lando has done his usual request of no fish please and thank you. Damn. I was hoping that you didn’t order it so that could’ve been the free gift of the month on top of your Christmas presents. Whatever. Buying you a book will be a great second option and you can’t yell at me!
Oh haha, very funny. I knew this was going to be an issue when I brought you home but I’ll let it go, only because that means you’ll give me extra cuddles later for feeling bad. Kidding, kidding, but seriously. I’m glad that you can come over for New Years. It’ll be fun and everyone will be glad to see you.
Also, I appreciate what you did with the lipstick on this letter. Y/N, you truly flatter me. You think so highly of me that you’ll give me a kiss through the letter? Oh, be still my beating heart. I hope you like my washi tape decorations. I know it’s not on the level of kissing a letter but I think for the first time, it’s great. I also hope you like the polaroid attached as well, if it stays attached. Mom is pretty proud at capturing my failure of trying to build a gingerbread house.
See you soon & at New Years Eve, Oscar Piastri
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classypauli · 11 months ago
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She’s the Man
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Pairing: Jenna Ortega x fem Reader Summary: With the new university Y/N meets new opportunities, plays on the football team, meets new people, makes new friendships, and maybe finds something she didn’t think would find.... But being dressed as her brother can create little problems in the future. She’s the Man AU A/N: So this fic will be based on the movie She´s the Man, it won´t follow every step of the story, I had it in mind some time now and have been thinking about if it is a good idea or not but well, here goes nothing… Not forcing anyone to read this, idk just wanted to try something new. Warning: first time writing, bad grammar and punctuation in complex sentences, spelling errors, boring and awkward Word count: 5k I DON’T OWN THE MOVIE THIS STORY IS BASED ON OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS THAT ARE IN THERE. IT’S ONLY FICTION AND NONE OF THIS IS REAL.
Chapter 1
Y/N is sitting in her brother´s room, eyes wide open  „You can´t be serious! How am I supposed to do that?!“ she shouted at him. „I´ll be thankful to you till the end of my life.“ well, that won´t be for long if she decides to kill him right now. „Charlie-“
„Please Y/N you are my only hope, you know I´ve been wanting to go to this festival for so long, you know what it means to me, please.“ he puts his hands in a praying position, and now his puppy eyes are the only thing his sister can see. „Ew get away from me.“ she pushed him into the chest as he stumbled back.
Charlie, Y/N´s twin brother, wants her to impersonate him. Yeah, you heard it right, he wants his sister to go to his school and act like him this whole time that he will be on tour. He is in the band, their parents aren´t really happy about it, they say that music won´t get him anywhere and he should concentrate on the more important stuff. Y/N´s sad because she was always like if something makes you happy, that´s all that matters, right? But he isn´t giving up, he still hopes that he can convince them about being serious with music.
And don´t get her wrong, she´d do anything and everything for him, he is her brother, her twin, but this... She´s not so sure, it´s just too much, what if they find out? What if she isn´t good enough and mess up? What would their parents say? Oh God too much pressure on her shoulders and she didn´t even say yes.
But his sad and disappointed eyes are her last straw. „Gosh.... m'kay.“ Y/N whispered under her breath almost unnoticed. Charlie´s eyes lit up like Christmas lights and started running to his sister yelling „Thank you thank you thank you! I promise I´ll do anything for you!“ He almost suffocated her when they hugged. „Careful with your words and now get off I can´t breathe!“ he immediately pushed himself off and started his little winning dance.
She rolled her eyes at him „So how we are going to do that? I mean, I need to look exactly like you, act like you, talk like you, and EVEN SMELL like you? Well now I´m not so sure if I can do this I mean-“ she looked at him and scrunched up her nose. „Oh, you didn´t you f-“ he hit Y/N with the pillow in the head. She started laughing at her brother's offended face. „Just kidding stop being a baby.“
He stood up and started thinking „Well we look alike, like a lot, so there won´t be much work in the face-“ „What?!“ „-but you need to learn how to walk like me and dress like me. Stand up we are having our first lesson.“
They were practicing her walk, or more like his walk, and she got it pretty right. Clothes won´t be a big problem cause they wear uniforms and wearing baggy clothes is one of the most comfortable things for her. She doesn´t know how she will do it but for her brother, she needs to at least try.
A couple of days passed and now Y/N is sitting in the passenger seat, Charlie is behind the wheel. Sun is shining through the windows of their parent's car. She is wearing her school uniform and her leg is bouncing up and down in black uncomfortable shoes.
„Stop Y/N it will be okay-„ she turned to him „Well it´s easy for you to say! You aren´t the one dressed as me!“. Okay maybe she´s a little dramatic but she´s shitting her uniform pants right now, oh God please let this be over already.
Y/N didn´t even notice and they were already in front of the school. Students were walking back and forth, laughing and greeting each other after the holidays. The girl wasn´t a social kid growing up. I mean she doesn´t have a problem with talking to others, the problem is in the start of conversations. She can try as hard as she can but she never knows how to begin. Her mind suddenly stops working and becomes quiet. She´s not shy, at least she doesn´t think she is. For the longest time of her life, she thought that she was an introvert but as she was getting older she realized maybe she´s just a quiet extrovert. Y/N likes to listen to people more than talk to them. She likes to be by herself but also enjoys the company of the right people.
„Okay we are here, “ Charlie said „Just try to enjoy it, it will be fun“. Yeah, his twin is boiling with excitement.
They got out of the car, her brother went to get her bags from the back and she just stood there. Just like a kid for the first time going to school, doesn´t know what's waiting for them. She just realized that this is real and that what is she going to do is a crazy idea.
„Ch-Charlie I think I changed my mind I can´t do this-“
„Y/N STOP-“
Walking to her dorm room is the next thing, bags in hands trying to find her room. Finally, she sees the right numbers and she can´t wait to put these heavy bags in there. She unlocked the door and walked straight to the room.
„Oh hi!“ Y/N heard from the other side, looked up and her eyes met with the unknown boy.
„I´m Percy.“ he walked up to her and offered his hand „I´m guessing you are my roommate?“ He was a little taller than her and had long brown hair.
„Yeah, nice to meet you my name´s Y-Ch-Charlie, my name´s Charlie.“ she said as she shook his hand. Damn! She needs to concentrate more.
„Well Charlie pleasure to meet you“ he smiled „I´d like to sit and talk with you but I have to go now, you can put your clothes right there, and on the left side of the door is the bathroom, thankfully every room has one so not all students have to share the same one.“  Well, at least it would be easier for her to shower. Y/N thanked him as he walked away. With a sigh, she fell right into her new bed. She started unpacking and soon walked out of the dorm. She doesn´t know where is she going but she will find out. Silently cursed at her new roommate for rushing away even though he knew she was new. Y/N was in her world passing around the corner of the hallway until someone smashed into her.
“Oh shit I’m so sorry!”
The girl moved her gaze to the voice and there was a guy, he was taller than her and looked like he was in a rush, he was holding some clothes which were probably PE uniform.
“I didn’t mean to do it I swear I didn’t see y-“
“Hey it’s okay nothing happened but damn you are in quite a rush”. she laughed and he started to rub his neck.
“Yeah, I’m heading into football practice and I’m late again, oh God my coach is going to kill me, last time he said if this happens one more time he will kick me out of the team.” he kept rumbling but the only word Y/N could catch in his sentence was “football”.
“But hey at least you are okay, I’m glad nothing serious happened-“ she cut him off.
“Wait you play football?”
“Uhm yeah, doesn’t it look like it?”. He asked in a small voice as if he was sad about it. What? He definitely looks like someone who does some sport, he is big and tall with his big arms wide shoulders, and athletic legs.
“No I didn’t mean it like that-” he kept watching her with curious eyes “-I just used to play football too and yeah, I don’t even know why I react-“ his face lit up.
“You can go with me! We have enough space in our team!”
“Thank you but am not sure if-“
“No! Please! I’m not going to force you but you can at least come and look, please-“ he was giving her puppy eyes now “-if you come with me then the coach would forgive me maybe if I said I was bringing you-“
“So that’s what it is about!”
“No! Well- maybe- but it would be cool to have someone new on our team! And we are missing a midfielder because of his injury, so you could fill up his place”. Well maybe it wouldn’t be the worst idea, she can at least try. Y/N looked up at him and nodded.
“YES! Come with me- wait my name’s Mason”
“Charlie” she introduced herself with her brother's name.
They shook hands and started to walk into a field.
„You are new here, right? I don´t think I saw you before.“-
Y/N was now standing inside the cafeteria, she was looking around for a spot when suddenly she saw Percy, he was sitting in one of the middle tables with some of his friends. Before she could do anything he looked up and saw her.
„Charlie!“ he waved his hand for her to come over to the table, his friends already looking at her. Well, there´s no way to go back now.
„Hey, I wanted you to introduce me to my friends.“ he said smiling „This is Hunter and Georgie.“ Y/N shook their hands and took a seat.
„Nice to meet you, Charlie, “ Hunter said, „so how´s the first day goin´?“
„Well I´m just warming myself in here but so far I don´t have any negative words.“
Georgie took a sip of something he had in his cup and looked at her „That´s good, if you have a problem with something just ask.“
Hunter laughed at Georgie „Yeah but I don´t recommend asking Georgie for help with a class, he is the one who should seek help with that.“
„I´m not!“ he said offended. Y/N could only laugh at their bickering. „Don´t mind them-“ Percy wanted to continue with his sentence but his eyes caught something more interesting. She followed his gaze until she was met with three girls who walked into the cafeteria. They sat opposite their table and were discussing something that Y/N´s ears couldn´t hear because of the loud noise of other students in the room. She knew that Percy knew them or at least one of them, she would be an idiot to not catch that stare he was giving them but she was fighting with inner thoughts if she should ask or not. Before she could even decide Hunter saw that and turned around to look.
„Oh, “ he said, and soon Georgie followed Hunter's action and started laughing. „you may wonder why is Percy stuck. “ he said to Y/N. „Well Charlie, the one girl in the middle is Jenna, and Percy here has been trying to get with her forever but with no answer “. Oh, so he was looking at her. Yeah no wonder, she caught Y/N´s attention pretty quickly. She was really attractive even from this far. „He tried everything.“ Georgie continued „from writing her letter and getting it into her locker, drawing her portrait and leaving it on the seat she used to sit at to ask her in person but nothing!“ he laughed and Percy punched him into his shoulder. „This is not funny! I don´t know what to do anymore!“.
„Have you thought about that maybe she didn´t see you in that way?“ Hunter asked as he turned back to him.
„Of course you idiot but at least she could give me a chance“ 
„Well, I don´t know I mean... it´s a little strange I can´t even remember if I have ever seen her with someone. There are lots of guys who wanted to get with her but she turned them down, maybe she doesn´t want a relationship now-“ Hunter still kept looking at him with a serious face „-Or maybe she just thinks you are a creep.“ Georgie said and started laughing again. Percy groaned and put his head in his hands. Y/N could only smile at this boy, he was hilarious.
They were sitting there and talking mostly about classes and professors in school. She learned that Percy is in an art club and loves to paint. That would answer the question of why he has so many paintings on the walls of his side of the room, Y/N must admit he is talented and has a unique style. Hunter and Georgie, the two boys she just met, were friendly, they always tried to keep her in a conversation and asked her questions about her last school, hobbies, and family. The girl may don´t know them for too long but she can already say that she feels comfortable with them.
Y/N was speed walking out of her last class, she had a long day and couldn´t wait for it to end. Tomorrow she´s going to have her first training and she wanted to get herself some sleep. She was thinking about things to do when suddenly her body crushed into someone. Yeah, again.  She heard a small ugh and the sound of books falling on the floor. Well only her luck. She picked herself up and looked at who was the other person. She didn’t know if her eyes were making some magic on her or not. She realized what happened and started picking up her books from the ground.
“I’m so sorry- I didn’t mean to!“
“No no, it was my fault.” Y/N looked at her and was met with big doe eyes. Her brain couldn’t process what was happening. In front of her was Jenna, the girl from the cafeteria, she was wearing a school uniform and stood shorter than Y/N, her dark brown eyes, which she couldn´t see a couple of minutes ago clearly, matched her long hair.
Suddenly the door from a principal’s office opened and he walked out. „What is-?“ he started but as he looked at the scene in front of him he smirked. „Getting to know the opposite sex, are we? Male-female dynamics. All that sexual tension. It's all part of the high school experience. So continue. Please. But keep it clean, though. OK. Abstinence is key. Abstinence is... the best way to not is to not... yes.“ he slowly took back steps and closed his door.
„Well“ Y/N sighed and looked and the other girl „That was awkward... is he always like this? Friendly?“ she asked her. Jenna softly laughed „Are you kidding? That´s him being rude“.
„Okey... ehm... I´ll continue with my way.“ She didn´t know why she was acting like this. „Here are your books.“ She handed her them and shot her apology for eyes „Sorry again I didn´t mean to.“
Jenna only looked up at her with wide eyes „It´s okay, nothing happened “ she smiled „Hope to see you again“.  Y/N quickly walked away leaving the other girl behind her. Damn, she needs to put herself together.
The next day Y/N felt a lot more relaxed, she spent almost all afternoon with Mason and she decided that he just become her favourite person. He was so kind. Keeping an eye on her and always asking if she needed anything. He was outgoing and even though her new friend was the polar opposite of her social life, Y/N couldn´t help but feel comfortable with Mason.
The whistle was heard from the football field and Y/N was trying to find her way of getting the ball into the net. God, she missed it so much. Her legs were running like there was no tomorrow, others got in her way to stop her but they never succeded, Y/N was too good. She knew that. In the past, when she used to play, she was one of the best, if not the best, in her team. She truly enjoyed it and now that she finally had the football ball on her foot there was no way to stop her. Y/N shot the ball into a net and it flew straight to the right top corner of the goal.
„What? Charlie! How are you this good man?“ Mason ran to her and grabbed her shoulders smiling. „And here you wanted to decline my offer!“
„Well I got a little lost.“ They started walking slowly to get their water as they got a quick pause from the coach.
Some people were sitting on the tribune but she didn´t mind. This wasn´t only a football field, there were a lot of sports grounds and right now there were a lot of athletes too. She scanned the chairs when suddenly she caught the girl. The same girl she saw for the first time in the cafeteria and the second time ran into. She had books on her knees and a bag beside her, her hair was waiving in soft wind. But there is no way that she came to look at the football training, right? She was waiting for someone, maybe her friend. But as she kept looking, their eyes met and Y/N quickly looked the other way. This was embarrassing. Luckily she was saved by the whistle and that made her jog her way to the coach.
At the end of her training coach called the girl on the side „Good job today Y/L/N, I would be glad if you come next practice.“ he said as he waited for her answer.
„Yes, you will see me, thank you for having me.“ He only nodded his head and walked away. Mason came to her side and was smiling widely „You impressed him today, I wouldn´t be surprised if he let you play in our next game.“ his eyebrows went up and down.
She was glad that she let herself be talked into this, Y/N hadn´t felt this alive since she could remember. It was for sure a good idea and couldn´t wait for the next practice. As she was walking back she shot one last glance at the tribune only to find the spot Jenna sat in empty.
Y/N was leaning on a table, they were waiting for their professor to start a class. She´s standing beside Percy, Hunter, and Georgie. They are talking about plans for the weekend. Y/N doesn´t really listen she just looks like she is listening.
She was thinking about her brother and how she would call him when her class was over. He already texted her, asking how it was going and if she had any troubles. She misses him, but she won´t tell him that of course, and how could she not, he is her twin, her other half.
The teacher walked to their group with a bucket in her hand. „Everyone, please take a slip and read off the name of your lab partner.“ Percy was the first one who grab the folded paper, he got Emma Myers. Emma was one of the group of girls they saw in the cafeteria. „Oh you are lucky, she´s cool.“ Georgie says and Hunter nods at his words.
Y/N unfolded her paper “Jenna Ortega” she says out loud and Jenna immediately looks at her with a smile. “You know each other?” Percy hissed at her. “No, not really” quickly turned away with a slight hint of red cheeks. “Switch up with me please” he went to grab the paper with the girl´s name on it. “I can’t! She already heard me, what would she think?” the girl grabbed her things and went to her new lab partner.
“Hi.. so you are my lab partner?” “Yeah,” she said smiling.
„I don´t think we introduced each other the other day.“ she was hitting on the day they both ran to each other. „No we didn´t, I´m Jenna.“ she grinned. „I´m Charlie.“ She almost forgot about her brother. Y/N felt Percy´s gaze but didn´t mind him. It´s not her fault that she got lucky to get her as a lab partner, right? It happened because of something she can´t control.
“You know ehm... the whole dissecting thing kind of freaks me out. So, think you may have to take the reins on this one.” she said slowly.
Jenna leaned into the table with her eyes still on the other girl.“Wow, no guy would ever admire that” Oh f- Y/N quickly realized her mistake. What is she even saying? “Shit, you are right” Her hands started to sweat but before the inner thoughts and anxiety could grow even more the brown-haired girl grabbed her hands. “No! It’s okay you don’t have to be embarrassed, it’s cute”
Y/N moved her eyes from their hands and looked at her. God her doe eyes, they were beautiful, so innocent and pure. She lowered her gaze at her smiling lips and then her dimples, at that action Jenna smiled even wider. “So today we are going to-“ she quickly pushed her own hands away and looked at the professor acting like she wasn’t just drooling over her classmate. This will be long.
“So how it went?” Percy asked.
“What do you mean?”
“The talk with Jenna, how it went? What were you talking about?” Y/N turned to him placing books on her table. They were in their dorm right now since their classes were over. “Nothing, just school work” Well she wasn’t lying. They were just talking. He was silent for a minute, looking out of the window.  “What are you thinking about?” the girl questioned him but his eyes were telling that his thoughts were elsewhere.
“Charlie I need you to do something for me” Well this doesn’t start well. “ Can you convince her to go out with me?” “Who?” He turned to her. 
“Jenna of course! It’s just I’ve been into her-“ yeah she had noticed “-for so long and this is like a perfect opportunity for me that she will finally say yes to me.” he sat on her bed and looked up at her. In this position, it seemed like he was giving her an ultimatum like there was no other answer than the one he wanted. And like dude, there may be a reason if she didn’t say yes to you yet. He keeps looking at her waiting for the girl's answer and to be honest, for some reason, she doesn’t really like the idea of him with Jenna together but on the other hand, she can’t just say no to him. Why is she always the one who needs to please someone's needs?
“Well, I’ll see what I can do”. Y/N nodded her head and Percy instantly got up.
“Thank you Char you are a lifesaver!” he smiled wide at her and went to his bed as she just stood there looking at the ground.
At night Y/N couldn´t sleep, she was thinking about what Percy said and she didn´t feel good about it. Because of something, it felt a little disrespectful towards Jenna, almost unfair. But she already agreed. She will just say something nice about him and see where it will go, she can´t influence Jenna´s decision after that and Percy can´t be mad at her if this doesn´t work.
She picked herself up and went to the bathroom, silently thanking God above that this wasn´t a public bathroom, and could shower without being scared that someone could see her. She doesn´t even know what she would say if someone finds out the twin´s secret. But she doesn´t want to think about that option.
A couple of days passed. The classes were good but the football practices were her favourite. Coach wants her to play in the upcoming game and she just can´t wait. Mason is her right hand and he is always supporting her, now when she doesn´t have her brother near, the boy is playing the role of her twin. Today she and Jenna have class again. They are talking a lot more. Y/N liked her, she was sweet and always smiling, she also found out that Jenna likes to listen to music and loves acting. She even recommended some of her favorite movies which Y/N didn´t see yet. They spend a lot of time together, besides being together in class, they also sometimes hang out in the cafeteria and walk together to classes, and sometimes she even sees Jenna watching her practice. Y/N doesn´t know how she found out about her being in the team but she isn´t even sure if the brown-eyed girl is sitting there every practice for her.
„What?“ Jenna was shocked „How come you have never seen that?“ they were talking about films, the movie Scream to be exact. They were sitting under the tree on some bench. Students were walking around chatting, birds were singing in the trees and the sun was shining through the holes of the leaves. Y/N was walking out of class when suddenly she saw the other girl. Jenna asked her if she wanted to grab coffee since they had some free time. So now they were sitting next to each other, talking about everything.
„I have heard about it but didn´t see that, don´t know why.“ Y/N shrugs her shoulders. Jenna only shook her head at the girl.
„That´s a mistake, it´s so cool, the actors, plot, cinematography, blood-“ she started to mumble about the movie when suddenly an amazing idea crossed her mind „we can watch it together sometime!“ she let out and looked at Y/N for an answer. She only kept her gaze on her if she heard it right. She wanted to say yes but there was something in her telling her that it would be unfair for Percy.
„Yeah sure, that would be awesome“ Y/N said smiling. Jenna shot her smile back.
„Okay, so this friday?“ she asked the other girl. Y/N looked at Jenna, she didn´t know this girl would be so fast, she thought they were just talking about the possibility, not that they were already making plans.
„Yes, I should be free.“
„Great, can you give me your phone?“ Y/N gave her phone to Jenna „Here, you better text me football player.“ she said smiling as she stood up from the bench and started to walk away. Y/N laughed softly.
„Of course.“ she whispered under her breath and kept staring at her back until she couldn´t see her anymore. She picked up her phone and looked at the new contact. Jenna xx.
It was already the end of the week Y/N was getting ready to hang out with Jenna, and she texted her about the details. They are going to watch the film in the other girl´s room since her roommate is going to a party. She walked out of the bathroom and saw Percy, she didn´t tell him about her going out. It´s not like she has to say it to him, right?
„Hey you planning to go somewhere?“ he asked.
„Uhm... yeah, some boys from the football team asked me about hanging out with them.“ she said. Y/N hated lying but what would he say if she told him she was hanging out with the girl he had a crush on? It´s not her fault that Jenna invited her, or is it?
„Oh okay, we are going to the party some students are throwing, wanted to ask you if you want to come but it´s good.“ he only smiled at her. She thanked him and he soon left the room. It was already time to go so she picked up some snacks she bought and left the dorm.
“So? Your rating?” Jenna turned to face the other girl. They just finished watching Scream and all Y/N can say, it got her. They were sitting on the small couch, snacks around them, she faced Jenna and only the light from the TV made her see her. The girl´s hair was loose on both sides of her face, she was not wearing any makeup and her bare face only made the girl’s heart skip a beat. It was refreshing seeing her like this and also Y/N felt proud because this meant that Jenna felt comfortable around her.
“It was pretty good, not bad not good.” Y/N acted unbothered.
“Oh yeah? That’s why you didn’t blink the whole movie?” she smirked at Y/N, she squinted her eyes at her “Be honest.”
“Okay! I enjoyed it so much and actually liked the plot, that’s what you wanted to hear?”
Jenna tilted her head “That’s what I thought. What can I say… I have a good taste.”
They kept silence between them, it wasn’t embarrassing or tense silence. It was comforting. They were looking at each other.
“Tell me about your family.” the brown-eyed girl said softly, holding gaze with the other girl.
“Well, I live with my parents and my twin sister” Jenna raised her eyebrows.
“You have a twin?” Y/N nodded at her question.
“What is she like?”
“Well…“ she didn’t know what to say, it felt weird talking about herself as if she was talking about someone else “She is cool, likes to keep things to herself most of the time, likes reading and writing poems…”
“She sounds interesting, you could introduce us to each other sometime.” she smirked at her.
“Yeah, I think she would like you”
“You think?” Jenna straightened her back “I’m amazing! Of course, she will!”
Y/N throws her head back with a laugh.
“How can you be so sure that you will meet her?”
“Oh believe me” Jenna smiled at Y/N “I know.”
Y/N felt the vibe of the room change. When she was with Jenna she almost forgot about everything and everybody, her brother, her parents, school, her and Percy´s deal, her impersonating her twin…
But only almost.
next chapter
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gatheredfates · 1 month ago
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WELCOME to Sea's Catch Up (For) Starlight Challenge! Also know as 'A FFIX Prompt?' (I just woke up), 'Is it Cosy or Cozy in Australia?' (Cosy) and bEANS (bEANS!).
Suffice it to say, there have been a lot of challenges this year—Gpose challenges, FFXIV Write, Down to Dawntrail and Seafloor Saints Wake (just to name ours)! I know from personal experience that I haven't had the time to get to every single prompt... but I've wanted to. I also know it can be really disheartening to miss out on prompts and feel like you're being weird for engaging with it later on in the year.
To that end, I wanted to open a challenge that encourages people to either tackle an existing prompt from any gpose/writing/art challenge that was hosted during the year (under the excuse of it being for this challenge) OR pick from one of the prompts above to make a Starlight-themed creative piece!
All of these words were chosen by various people within the SEAFLOOR Discord, and i have tried not to tie them too closely to Christmas so people who don't celebrate the holiday don't feel left out. If you want to change a word that is more applicable to your culture, but still embodies the same spirit of the holiday through family, humanity, spending time with your loved ones, etc. I highly encourage you to do so!
This challenge will run the entirety of the month of December and can be tackled in any way you see fit. If you want to do a prompt a day and mix in the words in amongst working on your old project(s), go for it! If you want to select some words and not others, cool! If you want to only work on your old stuff and leave this list in the dust, a okay! It's all about giving you a low-stakes way to engage with your creativity and an excuse to go back to stuff you might have missed, or take some time to celebrate the season and people who mean a lot to you (and your ocs)!
Please use the tag #catch up (for) starlight if you participate and consider joining our community! A more comprehensive FAQ is contained in the read more below. ☃️
But also:
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Is the use of mods/shades/tools okay? Yes, of course! Whatever works for you to make your creative dreams come true.
What about NSFW (gore, sexual or otherwise)? Use common sense and appropriate tags as necessary, especially for common fears and phobias. I obviously cannot control what Tumblr sees as being too much, but the general rules for SEAFLOOR apply where possible. If your conservative boss wouldn't like to see it, consider tagging and content warning were necessary.
Where do I post works? Hopefully your Tumblr blog, silly, but you can also reblog them to the SEAFLOOR Tumblr Community or join us on Discord! If someone posts their work in either of those spaces, consider reacting with a wintery-themed emoji! It just lets people know you enjoyed it. ❄️ I am going to do my best to reblog prompts when I see them, but I am going away during the Christmas period so I may not be contactable in that time.
Is there a prize? There might be this time around, though I haven't given it much thought. Seafloor members will get a fancy cosmetic title.
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covetyou · 1 year ago
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baubles
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ao3 ⋆ main masterlist ⋆ series masterlist
pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader rating: Explicit (18+ only!) warnings: ball fucking, ball sucking, balls, wall to wall all ball, BIV (ball in vagina), sex toys (the balldo [link to website] is real and it has haunted my dreams for 6 months - pic in this ask), there's some PIV too I guess. word count: too many and they're all balls 4.4k summary: Santa Joel fucks you with his balls. That's it.
A/N: I am NOT sorry. Not now, not ever. And, yes, I watched the instructional video on how to put it on, purely for Research Purposes. We don't talk about how long I've spent thinking about balls.
Happy Ball-idays, don't say I never got you anythin' nice.
...
Santa Joel-y, slip your ballsack right into me, oh gee.
I've been a fuckin' good girl,
Santa Joel-y, so stuff 'em up my chimney tonight.
...
It was your first Christmas in Texas and your first Christmas in a place that felt unseasonably warm for the time of year. That's what you tell yourself every night as you strip off completely before slinking into bed, at least.
Except, this night is different.
It's Christmas Eve.
And someone is in your house. You're sure of it.
A click of a button and you're on your feet, creeping to your bedroom door to listen out for the intruder. You almost didn't hear it, too preoccupied to be on the lookout for burglars on Christmas Eve.
There's a tell tale rustle, the stomp of feet. Whoever it is, they're not even trying to be quiet. You'd respect the brazenness of it all if someone hadn't broken into your damn house. You toy with calling the cops, maybe a neighbor, but you know it'll be too late by the time anyone gets here to do anything, so you make the stupid decision to head downstairs and confront the intruder alone.
Wrapping your flimsy bath robe around yourself, you grab the nearest makeshift weapon you can find (a broken umbrella you still hadn't thrown away) and click the door open, slinking out into the hallway and down the stairs.
If he hears you before you get down the stairs, he doesn't let on. But there, right in front of your Christmas tree is the unmistakable figure of a man. A big man. He's tall, and broad, and his silhouette is wrapped in something fluffy, making it look like there's a giant teddy bear standing in your living room.
You flick the light on, startling him, making him drop a heavy bag undoubtedly filled with your things onto the floor with a heavy thud.
"Oh, shit."
A single ornament rolls out of the bag and across the floor. You both stand frozen and silent, watching it move until it knocks against your bare toes. Only when it's stopped do you drag your eyes back up to look at the man who broke into your house.
Your umbrella clatters to the floor.
"What the...?"
The man before you is dressed as Santa, hat and all.
Only this man was not as old as you would expect for someone claiming to be Santa Claus. His beard is patchy, the scruff around his chin only speckled with gray. He has lines around his eyes, crinkled divots in his skin from so many years of laughter. The red coat pulled around his form is unbelted, falling open at the middle to reveal a white vest and the soft swell of his belly.
"What the fuck are you doin' in my house?" you yell.
"Shh, quit your fuckin' hollerin'."
He takes a step toward you and you back into the wall, trying to keep your distance from the very Texan man who had broken into your house dressed as Santa on Christmas Eve.
And that's when you see behind him, to the glittering lights of your Christmas tree, and the branches covered in ornaments. Ornaments that did not belong to you. You'd bought the thing on sale at the grocery store just a week ago. When you put it up and plugged it in, grateful for the existence of pre-lit trees, you settled on the fact you wouldn't decorate it this year. Even so, it was beautiful as it was, and you enjoyed the soft glow of the lights in the evenings as you wound down after work. Now, that soft glow was accompanied by the twinkling reflections of the many ornaments hanging on it.
"Did you... did you decorate my tree?"
He looks at you like you're mad, and maybe you are. Maybe you came so hard on your vibrator upstairs that you passed out, and this is all a dream. A very vivid dream where you can smell the warm oaky scent of the man in front of you and feel the heat of him as he crowds you against the wall.
"What else do you think I've been doin'?" he says, as if it should be entirely obvious that he's been here decorating your tree all along.
"I don't know, maybe stealing my shit?"
He, once again, looks at you like you're stupid and gestures to his suit, red and velvety, draped around his body. It looks good on him, and does nothing to help the thick syrupy feeling still coursing through your veins. Having a man like him break into your house felt like one of lifes great injustices, but having him break in when you were mid-jerk off was purely inhumane. Other than point to the door and tell him to get out, there was nothing you could do but gape at him and hope he didn't notice you curl your toes as he looked at you.
He takes a step closer, heavy boot falling with a thud in front of you, and shrugs. "If you don't want it, I'll take it back."
Up this close, the smell of him goes straight to your head, your body seemingly ready and rearing to go at the slightest hint of something masculine in your presence. Your tongue suddenly feels too big and clumsy so, not trusting a single word that would come out of your mouth, you shake your head. You would actually, really, very much like the decorations to stay and the man who put them there.
Texas always felt hot to you, but something about this room was now super heating. You're keenly aware of the stickiness pooling between your thighs, and even more aware of the visible sheen of sweat on your head and the warmth in your cheeks. If he looked closely, he'd even be able to see glistening on your fingers, making you look glitter coated in the twinkle of the Christmas lights. You shift, trying to mask the buzzing in your veins at his eyes as they drag down your body.
You hadn't noticed the silky tie of your robe slowly loosen as you wiggled and fidgeted. You were too warm to notice when the fabric parted, gaping over your chest and giving him a perfect view of your tits. You were too busy staring into his deep brown eyes to notice him raise his hand.
You did, however, feel the moment his finger stroked a slow trail down the swell of your breast, puckering your nipple and making a shudder run through your spine.
"You're all unwrapped, darlin'," he whispers, just as you remember to breathe again. "S'gettin' a bit warm in here, huh?"
He absentmindedly discards his hat as his finger traces down your body, flicking the light back off behind you once his hat hits the floor. You know where he, and this, is heading, and you're not keen to stop it any time soon.
When his fingers stroke across your mound, you gasp. Your vibrator had made you sensitive, but you'd never had chance to finish the job, and now here he was threatening you with a good time. He cups you, completely engulfing your pussy in his broad hand, and slides it between your legs.
By now it's no secret you're already wet, your upper thighs already sticky with it. His fingers slide through with ease, the quirk of his eyebrow visible now his hat has been thrown to the side.
"Here I was thinkin' you were on the nice list. But this little thing right here tells me you're naughty as they come, darlin'. What you been doin' to yourself all alone up there in the dark?"
You're staring at him opened mouthed as he works is thick fingers over you, dragging slick over your already sensitive clit. You'd been moments away from coming when the noise from downstairs pulled you out of it, and now here he was working you back up and quickly.
"It's my house," you stutter. "Can do what I want." And right now you want to collapse into a heap on the floor with his fingers between your legs.
"That you can. You wanna go back up there and finish yourself off?"
Logically, you know your pre-orgasm desperation is clouding your judgement, that you should take him up on his offer to leave and put a stop to this, but there's something too enticing about him. You don't want to stop.
"Or do you maybe want a hand with your... Little problem?"
"Yeah," you're nodding, eyes so heavy now you want them to snap shut, but you can't resist looking at him in the glow of your Christmas lights. Red really suits him, and you swear you can see his cheeks get rosy in the dim lighting.
"S'good. Got some little problems here myself. But, seein' as you're already halfway there, seems only fair to get me to your level before we start anythin', don't you think?"
Biting your lip, you nod, taking a step closer to him. Tentatively, you reach out a hand and caress the front of his pants. They feel velvety soft, and you have no fucking clue how he doesn't look as sweaty as you feel.
"That's right. You feel that?"
You feel something grow beneath your palm. Big, thick, and heavy. You look down in stunned silence, seeing only the odd shadows cast by the Christmas tree lights sparkling over the front of his pants.
"Get on your knees and close your eyes."
You obey, wanting very much to stay on the nice list now that you know exactly what you want for Christmas. His belt jingles as he undoes the buckle, pulling it from his waist and discarding it on top of his bag. He can't resist giving his dick a quick squeeze over the fabric of his pants at the sight of your bare chest heaving in the twinkling light, before unzipping them and letting them fall down to his ankles. The fabric is so loose he can step out of them, easily tugging his booted feet from the legs.
It doesn't go unnoticed that you spend the entire time eyes closed, listening attentively, and gently rocking your hips, discreetly humping the air in a desperate attempt to find any kind of relief.
"Tsk, got an impatient one on our hands."
The same hand he'd been stroking your pussy with wraps around his cock, slowly dragging his sticky fingers up and down his rapidly hardening length. He wishes he'd told you to strip, or left the light on so he could see you more clearly, but something about your skin under the sparkling lights and the shadows cast between your legs is making him harder more quickly than ever. When his dick twitches in his hand at your deep sigh, he finally stops staring and speaks.
"Open your eyes."
You snap them open, eager to see what he has for you, and your eyes immediately turn the size of dinner plates.
His cock gorgeous, and even in the grip of his large hand it looks big. He's long, thick with a slight upward curve and a smattering of salt and pepper hair at the base. You're fairly certain he trims it, keeping it well groomed and flush to his skin, making his cock appear even larger as it juts out infront of him.
But, despite the gloriousness of this mans cock, what you can't get over are his balls. They're heavy, and full, and getting tighter and tighter as his cock hardens under your gaze. You flick your eyes up to his face and he has a knowing smirk pulling at his lips.
"Fuck," you say as you look back down at it, at them, and let out a shaky breath.
His whole body shakes with a laugh, jingling his bells, as you take in his length. Hand never leaving his cock, his gentle strokes become firmer, and he's guiding the tip toward your face a moment later.
"What should I call you?" you ask, realizing you don't even know his name yet, just as his tip touches to your lips. Exhilarating as it was to fuck a man who had broke into your house, you still wanted to know his name, and not even to press charges - you wanted to know what to scream when you came.
"Santa works just fine."
Pulling back, you scoff, "You want me to call you Santa Claus?"
"Fuck no! Do I look like a Claus to you? S'Joel."
"Santa Joel?"
"Fuck yeah darlin', now open up."
You stick out your tongue, waiting for his cock to slide along the spit slicked muscle. He drags his tip across it, letting you lick at his head before you capture his cock in your mouth, sucking it in and flicking your tongue lightly on his frenulum. The salty sweet taste of him makes you crave more, so you draw him further into your mouth, sliding up and down his cock as he stares down at you with an open mouth.
Dragging your hands up his bare thighs, you grab the base of his cock with one, steadying him as you suck. You tickle the other across his balls, looking up at him as he pulls in a sharp breath, before grabbing them and massaging them. His balls feel entirely smooth to the touch, and you have an irresistible urge to put them in your mouth.
Dragging your lips back from his cock, you lick broadly up the length of it again and again until you're dragging your tongue across his ballsack, slowly trailing up his cock to his tip, watching him all the while. Then you kiss his balls, humming in satisfaction as you finally press your lips to the soft skin.
The sight of you on your knees, making out with his balls is sending him stupid, and all he can do is stare down at you with a look of deep concentration on his face. If he's not careful, he's going to blow his load early, coming in your hand before he even gets to fuck you.
He watches you lightly drag your teeth over his delicate ball skin. He swears he sees your eyes flicker with something deserving of the naughty list when you hear his intake of breath, but he's too preoccupied by your tongue lathing across them to take much notice. You take it in turns with them, sucking each ball into your mouth as you slowly pump his cock in your fist, before releasing and working on the other. By the time you've had enough, his cock is dripping, smearing pre-cum over your hand as you jerk him.
Licking the drippy mess off of your hand, you look up at him, savouring the taste of his cum in your mouth.
"Please tell me you want to fuck me," you say, biting down on your swollen lips. You don't know what you'll do if he says no now, you know going back upstairs to your vibrator just won't cut it, even if you now have the fantasy of kissing Santa's balls to get off to.
"You kiddin' me, darlin'? Get up here."
Relief and desperation wash through you, and you climb off your aching knees, letting your robe fall from your arms.
"Couch?" you say, keeping a firm grip on his cock as you stroke up his chest. He pulls you toward him, holding the back of your neck as he kisses you, tasting his cum and balls on your tongue. His lips are impossibly soft, just like his balls, a stark contrast to the scratch of his beard.
Moving to the couch, you bend over, wiggling your bare ass for him. He chuckles, stepping closer to you and marvelling at the lights dancing over your jiggling backside. He shucks off his own coat now, leaving him in just his vest and boots, and hones in on the peek of your pussy from between your legs.
Sliding his length up and down your slit he groans, gripping your hip in his massive hand just as he notches at your entrance.
"Well, shit, that's nice," he says, sliding his tip into you.
You're inclined to agree - it had been a long time since anyone other than yourself had fucked you, and the red hot feeling of his hard cock in you felt better than you remembered. He rocks his hips a little, drenching his cock in you bit by bit until he's fully sheathed inside your eager pussy. The solid beat of your heart throbs through your veins and straight to your core, making you clench around him as he begins to fuck you.
"You're gonna yank my dick clean off if you keep that up."
"Can't help it," you moan, "Feels so good." You let your eyes close, succumbing to the slow, steady, pleasure building in you.
Snapping his hips more firmly, he bottoms out in you over and over, pushing deep inside you with each thrust. You can feel his wet balls slap against you, rhythmically whacking into your clit, but it's not enough. You're so desperate to come you lick your fingers and reach between your legs, swiping your digits over your clit. His balls instead slap against your fingers and you can't resist trying to stroke them again.
The noises you're making are going straight to Joel's dick, and he knows he's going to blow his snowy load way before he's ready if you don't stop, so he pulls away from you. You protest as his cock slides out of you, leaving you empty and still desperate to come.
"Got a present for you," he pants from behind you.
"The ornaments?"
"Yeah. Got some real pretty baubles for you, darlin'. You'll like 'em. I promise."
He goes to his bag, long forgotten on the floor, and bends over it. You watch his soft ass and the swing of his dick and balls as he rummages around inside the sack, pulling out two things before standing up. When he doesn't immediately turn back around, clearly playing with his own cock, you start to worry that you're not satisfying him. But then he rounds on you and you see his cock and balls glisten wetly in the twinkling Christmas lights just as he throws a bottle at you. Lube.
Catching him opening another box, you gasp and draw your hand to your chest in mock shock.
"Is that not my present to open?" you say coyly, now trickling lube over your own pussy. You don't need it, but whatever he has in mind clearly calls for it.
"Good things come to those who wait."
"I'm still waiting for the coming part."
He shoots you a admonishing look and you raise your hands in surrender, before snaking one back down to keep rubbing at your clit. You're about to go mad if you don't come soon, your clit is so sensitive, a firm nub between your legs now, and your pussy so puffy from so much stimulation. It's a wonder you have any blood left in your brain at all.
The object in the box is revealed, and you can do nothing but gape at it as Santa Joel proudly holds it up with a hand on his hip.
It looks like a torpedo cockring hybrid, and you have no fucking clue what it is.
"Get yourself comfy, gotta strap myself in."
Laying back on your couch - for all its flaws, an armless couch certainly had its benefits - you spread your legs and watch him with curiousity. You still can't work out what it is.
"What is -"
And then he stretches the silicone underneath his balls, pushing each ball into the cage with his thumbs before letting go. Oh.
Oh. "Oh."
You sit in stunned silence. He's turned his balls into a dick or, more accurately, a dildo. With the length of it and the girth of his balls, you can only imagine what it's going to feel like.
"If you don't fuck me with that in the next two seconds I'm gonna scream."
With the contraption strapped around his balls, pulling them down and taught, crouches over you, pushing your legs back so your pussy is pointing skyward like a sloppy wet landing pad for his balls.
He dunks the tip of the dildo into your pussy. It's cold and unfamiliar, not like the velvety warmth of his dick that stands straight ahead of you, taunting you with its glistening tip. If you could fold yourself in a pretzel you would, just to suck the head of his cock back into your mouth.
He pushes down, squatting over you with bare legs, sheathing the entire dildo into you. Another push and you feel the swell of his balls as they pop past your entrance and nestle themselves inside of you.
You gasp. The feeling is wholly unfamiliar, but still you feel yourself soaking him, slicking up his balls as they sit in your pussy.
"That hurtin'?"
"No. No, it's just I- I've never had someone's balls in me before."
"A first ball fuckin' for this little pussy," he says affectionately, stroking a thumb over your lips as they wrap themselves around his balls. His cock is protruding out of you now, like you're wearing a life like strap, and you really wish you could reach to taste where his tip threatens to drip onto you. Suddenly you understand the boys back in highschool and their failed attempts to suck their own dicks.
"They feel so big inside," you moan as he begins to gently shift above you. He pops out of you once, and pushes back in, and you throw your head back onto the soft sofa woth a moan. You have never felt anything like this. "Joel, please don't stop. Please keep fucking me with your balls."
"You got it darlin'," his voice is soft, in awe of you as you take his balls and the toy deep inside you. You feel incredible, and the wet slip of your walls on his ball skin shoots straight down his dick, and for a moment he thinks he's accidentally came too early. A quick look from your face, contorting with the fullness in your pussy, down to where his dick sticks outward, tells him otherwise. Thank fuck. He knows he has to get you off quickly. You were soaking his dick not too long ago, and before that his fingers, and before that your own sheets upstairs. You were ready, and he was nothing if not a giving man.
His thumb finds your clit, slippery from lube and your own slick, and he circles it, applying a firm pressure as he moves.
"Oh my god, that's it," you plead, opening your eyes to look at where he plays with you, balls still sunk deep.
You spur him on, rocking your hips as much as you can with your legs back, fucking yourself on his balls as he strokes your clit. You feel your pussy tense, little spasms warning you of what's to come, and you hold on tight to your own legs.
"That's it darlin'. Come on my balls. Squeeze 'em."
"F-fuuuck."
The swipe of his thumb sends you over, and you come hard on his balls with your head back and eyes squeezed shut. Your legs shake and you know he can feel how you twitch and spasm around his balls, drenching them as he dunks them in you, shallowly thrusting them as you tighten and grip him hard.
He's holding your legs back for you, looking you in the eye as he bends forward over your limp body when you open your eyes. The feral look on his face tells you he hasn't come yet, and you're desperate to see when he does.
"You been so nice I'm gonna give you an extra present. You ready?"
"Please Santa Joel, I've been so good this year," you say with a soft smirk.
He soon wipes the smirk off your face when he fucks down into you harder, practically bouncing off your ass as he slots his swollen balls into your pussy. They feel so big and heavy inside you, and even strapped down and pulled tight by the toy, you feel his balls tighten and try to draw up closer to his cock as he gets closer to coming.
"Come on me. Please. Come on me," you beg, staring between his cock and his face. Pre-cum had been steadily dripping onto you, splattering your belly, but you were hungry for more.
His fingers grip around his flushed head, stroking easily over the slicked surface. Pushing his balls deep, he bounces gently, loving the feel of his sensitive ball skin inside of your soaked hole.
"Here it comes, darlin'. Oh shit."
"Yeah, come on me. Come all over me Joel."
"Shit. Fuck."
You watch his slit as it seems to wink at you before ropes of come spurt out of the tip, shooting across your chest and neck, spattering your face and even your hair with his cum.
"Yes, yes, thank you," your eyes have snapped shut. You can feel the warm trickle of cum by your eyebrow, and you're not keen to feel the sting of semen in your eye.
For a little while he looks at you, fucked out by his balls and laying boneless on your couch. With a soft pop he pulls out of you, leaving you feeling empty without his balls in you. Your legs flop down and you listen to his deep breaths.
"Nothin' like a ballgasm," he pants.
Nothing like being ballfucked, you think, but the words are heavy in your mouth and you do nothing but moan, mumbling some nonsense.
"Mm... balls. They... mm. Yeah. Good."
"Too fucked out, huh?" he laughs, before swiping the cum from near your eye. "Make a Christmas wish," and he slips the finger into your waiting mouth.
He slides his finger from your mouth and you murmur a thank you as you make your wish, sighing and letting yourself relax completely for a moment.
When you tentatively open your eyes, wary of any errant drops of cum, he's gone, disappeared as soon as he'd arrived. You didn't hear the door, the window, anything. You certainly didn't hear him get dressed.
Feeling stupid, and like maybe it was all just a dream, you rush to the window. You don't expect to see anything, the man feeling too magical to have been real. But, there he is, walking down the street bare assed, his pants slung over his shoulder and his balls still swinging strapped into the toy.
No, you don't think you'll be forgetting your first Christmas in Texas any time soon at all.
next part
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