#and who I think everyone would vote for this year once the semifinals are over

[anxiouspotatorants]

@stellaluna33​ be careful what you wish for.... Now let’s start off with a far too long list of Eurovision headcanons I have for Gilmore Girls.

While Richard and Emily did technically come across Eurovision (or at least national selection season) in the first half of the 80s (thank you @thatscarletflycatcher​ for that amazing headcanon) Lorelai herself wasn’t introduced to the world’s best singing concert until she met Michel. Michel told Lorelai about that time Celine Dion participated and won for Switzerland, which Lorelai then had to find proof of. Soon enough she catches her first taping of Eurovision (maybe 98 with Dana International) and she’s been obsessed ever since.

Lorelai loves everything at first, but over the years she grows a special kind of love for the truly tacky Eurovision entries. The more glitter and nonsensical english lyrics the better. 

Rory is obviously brought into this in her early teens and bonds with her mom over it. She does love a good tacky entry as well, but what really made Rory come back for the competition every year is all the political gossip and drama that seeps into each year. The voting results announcements is when Rory inches closer to the screen.

It’s not enough for Lorelai to enjoy this by herself with Rory. She shares her opinions with Michel (who hates it), makes a whole themed yearly event of it with Sookie, spreads the gospel of Eurovision to Miss Patty and Babette, and tries at least once to convince Taylor to make Eurovision week an offical town holiday or at least an event. Taylor will not approve of this anti-American nonsense. That is his loss.

Of course Luke is forced to sit through this every single year. And no he does not like it. He gets angry about the hypocrisy of all the “peace and love”-songs sung by artists representing countries that do not have peace and love in their policies, is intimidated by all the glitter, and could really do without the akward hosts. He will admittedly enjoy the odd dad-rock entry that comes every year, but keep it to himself since everyone else roasts them.

Since Michel is the one who introduced everyone to Eurovision (well, he introduced Lorelai who introduced everyone, but it wouldn’t have happened without him) and since he’s the only actual European around, Michel feels very protective and possessive of it. He will let Rory bait him into talking about how he as a Frenchman views other European countries (it gets stereotypical), and he will at the same time tear a hole into anyone who scoffs at ‘ethnic’ or non-English songs. 

Like his uncle, Jess is not a Eurovision fan and would really like to skip watching this, if only to avoid the crowds that Lorelai gathers for the event. He does like it when audience members sneak up on stage or something goes really wrong. Teenage Jess could stay away because of how things were going around that time of year, but adult Jess who visits multiple times a year for Doula and Luke and has to remain on civil terms with Lorelai cannot escape. And yeah, it might bring Rory joy to watch him awkwardly sandwiched between TJ and Luke watching Verka Serduchka scream numbers in German.

Lane loves Eurovision. She loves the showmanship, loves the variety of musical entries, loves being introduced to country-specific genres. When the internet community around Eurovision grows, she starts finding updates (and eventually streams) of the national selections around Europe and starts watching them as well. For Lane, Eurovision-season starts in December the year before.

Paris doesn’t really get Eurovision at first (noting the same hypocricy issue as Luke), but with time she starts to let loose and enjoy the circus for what it is. She tends to change what genre she prefers every couple of years, but she’s a loyal Portugal-supporter and likes pretending to be as above everyone else as Michel simply because she can speak Portuguese.

Dean never really got Eurovision, but would be fine watching it as long as he was spending time with Rory. Logan tried to convince Rory to get tickets with him and just head on over to Europe once for a finale, but to Rory that would be a betrayal against her tradition with Lorelai and the town. Either they all go or none of them go.

Richard and Emily are appalled by how tacky the whole event is, but they will watch it in the privacy of their home because it’s become a guilty pleasure. They tend to prefer French entries when the French aren’t sending songs like “Moustache”.

Lane has tried to get Hep Alien to add at least one Eurovision song to one of their setlists. She tends to try with safe rock songs like “We Could Be The Same” by maNga or “Something Better” by Softengine, but really she would love to do something hilarous and out of the box for their band, like “Secret Combination” or a Johnny Logan song.

Oh, but Jess liked “Viszlat Nyar” by AWS. He didn’t expect something like that to show up on Eurovision. It was nice.

Rory really enjoys that semi-indie music thing that’s been going on in Belgium and the Netherlands lately. Think “City Lights” by Blanche and “De Diepte” by S10.

Michel’s the kind of Eurovision-fan who prefers divas singing ballads or dancing girls with a whole crew on stage. 

Babette and Miss Patty will cheer for any entry with skimpy outfits, particularly shirtless men. “OPA” in 2010 was a moment for everyone: a fun one for the two of them and traumatizing for everyone else.

Miss Patty makes a whole separate drink for Eurovision. It has edible glitter in it.

Nobody in town seems to know what to make of Australia being in the competition. People like Lorelai and Sookie and Liz don’t mind, while people like Taylor find it categorically wrong that a European song contest has a country from the other side of the globe participate. But nobody even jokes about the US joining. Michel has made sure of that.

Lorelai’s all time favourite entry is Ukraine in 2004. Michel’s favourite is Switzerland in 1988 because of course.

Sookie uses Eurovision week as an excuse to experiment with different European cousines. At first she would do dishes from the host country, but nowadays she will occasionally switch to the country she’s rooting the most for that year or a country that hasn’t had a win in ages.

Michel still has access to voting, and when people catch wind of this it becomes a nightmare for him. Everyone wants to use Michel to vote for their favourite entry, but he refuses to do it for free, and refuses to blow up his phone credit for them. Eventually he gives the entire town 10 votes that they can bid on or agree on together, but either way Michel is getting compensation for this.

[beauty-and-passion]

Eurovision 2024: broken promises and one last hope

Hello.

I know this post took a bit longer than usual, but I needed some time to collect my thoughts about this year’s Eurovision.

Yes, I watched it. Why? Because it wouldn’t have been fair to the artists, who took part in this year’s competition. It’s not because of them that the show was so polarized, so they didn’t deserve to be punished for that.

Also, I needed to see how far the EBU would go. I needed to see and I needed to remember. And everyone needs to remember too. Remember this year and remember what happened, when the EBU followed its policy so strictly, it ended up making the most tense show I’ve ever watched.

I will share my thoughts and I will try my best to do it effectively. It won’t be a short post and I apologize, but I tried my best.

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Sweden: was it worth it?

We all had big expectations for this year’s show. There was Petra Mede, everyone’s favorite host. And Sweden is well known for doing great shows. This year should've been great.

 The first semifinal starts and we're bombarded by greatest hits of the past. Cool for five minutes, boring after one hour.

I’m disappointed: I expected something better from Sweden, not them recycling something already done in the past. But that’s what they did by sending Loreen back to win again, so I suppose it’s fitting.

Okay, so we have Johnny Logan, Ireland’s three-time winner. Is he singing one of his songs? No, he’s singing Tattoo.

Weird choice. Why call Ireland’s three-time winner to perform a Swedish song? Why call a representative of the nation who won as many times as you and make him sing one of your songs and not one of his?

If I were to think badly, I would think this was Sweden's subtle way to impose its supremacy on Ireland. A sort of: "You're not the best anymore, I reached you and I will surpass you. You will succumb to me". But Sweden would never do something like that, wouldn’t it?

Then we have the second semifinal. And we have a song, which can be resumed as follows: “We know we stole Finland’s victory last year, but instead of admitting there is a problem with the voting system (and the entire system for that matter), we’d much rather prefer to whine, because people have been sooooo mean with us. And yes, we will keep sending the same stuff every time, because it makes us win. At the end of the day, all we want is to keep winning, so shut up and love us.”

I don’t know you, but the line between being self-aware of your flaws and openly admitting all you want is to win (all while insulting the country that almost won last year, by saying that their show would’ve been so stupid ah ah, while ours is so cool, see how cool we are?) is very thin. And even the greatest hosting country of all time can succumb to its own hubris once in a while.

Then we reach the final. Okay, the semifinals' shows were meh and left me with a bitter aftertaste, but hey, that’s the final! It must be awesome!

After two hours, I was looking at the clock, waiting for the entire thing to be over.

Did we really need a thirst song about Martin Österdahl, the most hated EBU Executive Supervisor? Was it really necessary to sexualize this man? Is it because he’s Swedish? Is it because Sweden needs to kiss the ESC’s ass even more? Or is it because the ESC really really wants to make this guy more popular, considering people hate him?

After hinting at them in every possible way for the entire week, in the end we got AI-generated ABBA. Well, shoutout to the real ABBA for not participating in this: last year they said they would’ve not taken part and they didn't. Respect.

Alcazar were the biggest surprise of the entire week, because they are a piece of my childhood and Crying at the Discoteque is still a huge bop. But heaven forbid we having fun for more than five minutes, so they were sent away immediately.

At the end of the day, my question is: was it worth it, Sweden? Was it worth winning seven times, only to celebrate with the most boring show ever?

I cannot believe I’m saying this, but I missed Portugal’s show. Yes, the show I called “torture”, because they kept spamming the entire country for days.

You know what? I’d rather watch a country constantly spam its beauties and its culture, than another greatest hit compilation. By god, you’re hosting Eurovision. That's your chance to display your country on the greatest window Europe has to offer. And you use that chance, to repeat over and over “Eurovision good” and talk about it only.

I know Eurovision is good and cool and I love the reminder... but please, give us something more, Sweden. Something you. Listening to a country say: “We don’t have anything else to offer besides Eurovision” does not make me laugh. It makes me sad. It's not that you don't have anything else to offer, Sweden: it's that you don't want to show what else you have to offer.

You have gorgeous natural places (Höga Kusten and Gotland just to name two). You have the second-longest bridge in Europe and it's fucking impressive. Your capital is full of wonderful islands - and I found out there are tours with buses that go both on the ground and in the water. How fucking cool is that?!

Do we want to talk about culture? Your coffee breaks are literally part of your lifestyle and even have a specific name. You have that great concept of lagom which a lot of people should learn too. You are full of beautiful art and funny foods - heck, there is even a Disgusting Food Museum in Malmö! And I didn't find out thanks to Eurovision, but thanks to fucking Tripadvisor.

It's just sad, you know? Don't underestimate yourself so much, Sweden. You have a ton to offer besides this show.

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 The Netherlands: victim of paradoxes

Europapa was one of fan’s favorite songs and of course it was: a catchy tune, funny singer, fun and happiness for a song that was both a celebration of Europe and a touching love letter from Joost to his parents.

Of course it got people’s hearts. We all love the story of a character who comes up with a dream and wants to fulfill it. And if we can, we want to make that dream come true.

So just imagine how devastating it was, to find out Joost has been disqualified. I was minding my own business when I found out and I was shocked, so I can’t even imagine how bad his hardcore fans felt.

The first question was, of course, why. What happened? What could’ve done a man who has always wanted to attend Eurovision, to get disqualified? Not warned, not penalized. Disqualified. What did he ever do, to put in jeopardy his lifelong dream like that?

I don't know if we’ll ever find out the whole truth. All we know is that Joost asked a woman to stop filming him, she refused and kept following him, so he made a “threatening gesture” towards the camera, while not touching her.

Which gesture? No idea. Maybe he showed his middle finger, maybe he tried to lower the camera, maybe he said “fuck you and stop filming me”, maybe he tried to hit the camera. I don’t know. But in this case, I would really like to know - and not just what he did, but how the whole thing went.

If this year taught us something, is the importance of context. If Joost Klein tried to punch the camera is one thing and he should be condemned for that. But if Joost Klein tried to punch the camera after being filmed without his permission, because a woman was harassing him and following him, thus breaking the agreement that wanted him to not be filmed after stage… well, that's another thing.

Sure, he shouldn’t have reacted this way. But you can understand by yourself that snapping at someone out of the blue is one thing and snapping because you’re fed up with harassment is another thing.

Did Joost deserve some punishment? Sure. But did the person filming him without consent deserve punishment too? Of course. If you have to apply punishments, you have to do it equally, not with a double standard. So if he was disqualified, that woman should've been removed from her position too. But as far as I know, she wasn't.

Also, why didn't the EBU tell exactly what happened right from the start? Why refer to it as “an incident” and give only vague explanations? Why not mention Joost's disqualification during the Grand Final? Why did people have to find out through social media and the Grand Final happened as if nothing?

That's weird, that's not the behavior of someone who has nothing to hide. What’s the matter, EBU? Why this weird lack of communication? And why not show the footage of the incident and make everything clear? Now you’re respecting Joost’s right to not be filmed? A bit too late for that, isn’t it?

So yes, in a paradoxical turn of events, Joost Klein got his dream denied by the same show he wanted to be part of. The guy with the most European song ever, the one who stuck to the ESC motto “united by music”, the one who celebrated Europe, the one whose childhood dream was to be part of this European show, got disqualified by the same European show.

What can I say? I just hope karma will do its job for him. If he's innocent, he will get good things. If he's in the wrong, he will get his punishment.

In the meantime, you can still support him, stream his songs and check his albums. Here on YouTube you will find basically all of them, since it doesn’t seem he has a YouTube channel (yet).

And if his fans still find everything absurd and unjustifiable, don't worry: if Eurovision 2023 (and all previous ones) taught us something, is that you don’t have to be the winner, to steal people’s hearts. Sometimes, you just need one performance.

And this one stole everyone's heart.

Also, since apparently paradoxes were not enough, it seems like European flags were banned for being political? European flags during a European show in a European country in the European continent.

Uh?!

EBU, one question: on which continent do you think you’re in? Spoiler: it’s not America.

_________________________________

EBU’s biggest mistake

Let's talk a bit about the current global situation, shall we? No, you can't escape from it.

So, unless you lived under a rock until now, you know that the Israeli-Palestinian conflict has been going on for a long time and that recently it intensified again because of the new Gaza conflict. Israel pretends to not have committed war crimes, the rest of the world tells them to stop committing them, there are protests everywhere and people are ready to jump at each other’s throats to defend one country or the other.

Now, you’re the EBU. You say your show isn’t political. And that’s true: Eurovision isn’t political. Eurovision is a musical competition. It has nothing to do with politics.

But Eurovision takes place on planet Earth. And, as said, the situation on planet Earth is a bit tense right now. So you already know that, if you stick one single finger in this situation, you will get BIG reactions from the public.

So, what do you do, when Israel asks you to participate?

a) You tell Israel, very politely and very professionally, that you appreciate their application, but cannot accept them this year, because the situation is what it is and letting them in would bring chaos and potential dangers into a contest whose main foundation is being safe and non-political.

b) You let Israel in and let Palestine participate too, at least in spirit through people’s voices and decisions to mention it. This way, no one can say you’re taking sides, since you’re letting both sides participate.

c) You let Israel in and censor everything and everyone else, so not only you bring chaos inside your non-political contest, but make it even more political than ever and end up taking sides too.

Guess what EBU chose.

In order to stick to their non-political policy, EBU put blinders on and ignored the rest of the world. In order to let one country in because "Eurovision is non-political, so everyone is allowed to participate", they brought politics into their non-political show.

And no, it's not unexpected: it was obvious that, by letting Israel in, politics would've entered the competition too. This country and politics are bound tightly now, because of the current situation: of course if you let one in, the other will enter too.

And with politics, all the chaos of the current situation found its way in too. And that means EBU literally put in danger:

25 artists and their teams coming from all over Europe

the same Israeli gal and her team

all the tourists coming from all over the world to attend Eurovision

Swedish people who were living their normal lives and were suddenly surrounded by protests and chaos

the protesters who could've been involved in potential clashes

members of the police who also could've been involved in potential clashes

“But hey”, you might say, “nothing bad happened, in the end! You’re being too negative!”

Sure, thankfully nothing bad happened. But the risk was there, it was huge and it's not that "it would've been here anyway": the risk could've been completely avoided, by applying just a bit more human reasoning.

But even after politics found its way into the show, even after that, EBU could've saved the whole thing. If only one human being with a functioning brain said something like: "Okay, politics is in, even if we didn't want to. Now all we can do is let the other side of the conflict speak too, while we stay neutral".

But no, oh no. Mentioning Palestine and ceasefire means politics and our show isn't political. So let's ignore the fact that our decision to follow the policy verbatim led to politics being inside the show and let's keep applying the rules as if nothing: no one should mention politics, so Eric Saade cannot perform with the kefiah, Bambie Thug should remove their messages about ceasefire, Iolanda cannot keep her nails with Palestine's colors (seriously?!) and people's booing should be drowned with anti-booing technology.

You know, it's incredibly fascinating how EBU's stubborn decision to strictly follow the rules not only allowed politics inside the show, but led to the EBU itself taking a political stand, all while censoring every other opposition. EBU's rigid, mechanical application of the policy led to the EBU contradicting the same policy it was oh-so-religiously following. By making sure the show wasn't political, EBU applied censorship and not only made it even more political, but politically oriented towards one side of the conflict.

I don't know who the EBU members are and if they're human beings with functioning brains or just AI-generated bots, but please: stop following the rules like mindless robots and start using human reasoning in your decision-making process. And use common sense too, because if an idiot like me could foresee the consequences, you should've been able to foresee them too.

_________________________________

Israel: bullying cannot buy you victory

Now, we have Israel in. And the Israeli gal and her team perfectly know that their sole presence will lead to controversy and political stands.

So, if you were in their place, what would have you done?

kept a low profile during the entire competition;

showed at least an ounce of regret for unintentionally putting everyone in danger;

bullied everyone and tried to find any possible chance to beef with the other artists;

Guess what the Israeli team chose.

During the entire competition, these people kept harassing other artists, filming them without consent, calling them names, misgendering them. They kept this arrogant behavior, as if they owned the place and all other countries were just invited to their show.

And if there’s something I hate more than arrogance, is arrogance with a side dish of bullying.

So, to all the people whining because “Martina Satti yawned while Eden was speaking and Joost hid his face”: if that’s bullying, for you, you have a great life and I envy you. I wish I was bullied like that in school. But my bullying was more like… well, calling me names, harassing me and listening/spying what I was doing without my consent.

But apparently harassing the competitors wasn’t enough, so Israel decided to harass the viewers too, by begging for votes. Yes, they begged for votes. Yes, they spammed ads all over YouTube. Yes, I got one too and it was on a Eurovision-unrelated video and it made my blood boil. Yes, they were this desperate. And yes, that’s pathetic.

Also: is this legal? Is this allowed? EBU, are we sure this is part of the rules you follow so strictly? And please, tell me: is harassment also part of those same rules?

But do not worry: in the end, karma found its way. And despite the arrogance, the harassment, the tons of money spent to beg people, none of these means was enough to grant Israel the victory they oh-so-desperately wanted.

On the contrary: in a wonderfully ironic twist, the winner was one of the artists they kept misgendering and harassing. Mmmh, delicious irony, my favorite.

So thank you Israel for wasting money all over YouTube, I hope they were a lot. Thank you to all the people who made a political vote, you really got the spirit of the show, I hope you will never watch it again. Thank you Israeli team for harassing everyone and making an already tense competition even more tense. And, most importantly, thank you EBU for bringing politics in a non-political show: great fucking job, I hope someone will get fired.

And now, let's finally talk about music. Israel's song was nothing special, just the umpteenth bland song I've listened to 200 times already. And we all know it didn't get 300+ votes because everyone was in love with it. People's taste is not so bland and boring. And the final points proved it.

(On a side note, if I were Eden, I would be offended by these votes. At least the people who voted for Loreen last year didn't do it because of Sweden, but because of her talent. This year, I doubt that the people who voted for Eden gave a shit about her talent at all)

_________________________________

France: I need to make some apologies

Listen, you have to understand: we Italians know that French singers are good. We laugh, we say they’re “so French” and they keep Frenching and everything, but we know they rarely disappoint.

The problem is that France is good at the same things we’re good too. We’re both good at soccer, we’re good with food, wine, fashion. And we’re both good at singing.

So, France, remember: we might make fun of you but my god, your artists are amazing. When Slimane sang that part acapella two meters away from his microphone, I literally got shivers. He is a fucking great singer, his voice is incredible and he deserved more than 7 points.

I know French Frenching, but we should give credit when necessary:

_________________________________

Estonia, Spain and basically everyone else: two words and more apologies

Estonia 20th and Spain 22nd? Super robbed. The ignominy. The audacity. They served us beautiful Estonian language and a Spanish gal with a soft voice and that's how they got rewarded? They deserve more and better and people are stupid.

Also, I don’t know what kind of beef Greeks have with Marina, but she was good and doesn’t deserve all of this hate. Also because most of the complaints I've heard about make no sense, so… uh?!

Germany: fucking finally, people gave you votes. Thank you for persevering, your song was truly nice and I liked it too.

Armenia: yes, top 10! For great, lively, wonderful Balkan rhythm! You deserve it and your country deserves love and appreciation.

Italy: I’m okay with this result. Angelina’s performance was better, compared to the one in the semi-finals (also, better costume too, the other was too revealing and too much in general). 7th place is fine.

Ireland: I know that’s not a song for everyone and okay, fine, maybe it’s nothing special either… but my god, have you seen the performance they put on? A-ma-zing. It was interesting, captivating and full of details. And the narrative is perfect too: you can see how Bambie slowly befriends the demon and ends up killing it. It was truly enjoyable to watch. So I’m glad it got 6th place, they deserve an even higher position.

Ukraine: please keep slaying, your artists are always so great and they keep proving it every goddamn time. Also, that moment when Ukraine surpassed Israel was delicious: money truly cannot buy you love and support.

The UK: seriously, why are you whining about people not giving you points? The song was okay, but nothing truly special. Still, you got 18th place! What should Norway say, instead? Poor Norway, it has all my sympathy, the song wasn't this bad.

And now, to you all: you know what to do. Follow your favorites, stream their songs, shower them with love. Eurovision is over, but these artists are not disappearing. They are still out there, making beautiful music. Go check on them.

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Croatia: “the audience will come to my concert, not the jury”

Baby Lasagna was a blessing and as Italian, I want to properly apologize for giving it 16 points total only. You deserved 24, shame on us for being stupid morons.

Croatia gave us a beautiful song, from a beautiful artist with a great message and upbeat sounds. And I’m not the only one who thinks this, because the rest of the public agrees with me. Marko gave us pure joy and entertainment in an evening that was mostly sadness, tension and boredom.

And yes, it’s sad he didn’t win… but he knew it, before Switzerland’s points have been announced. Look at his face, during the final voting: as soon as Petra said Switzerland only needed 182 points, he realized he was going to lose. You can see him understanding and accepting it. He knew Switzerland would get these points. I knew. Everybody knew.

So no, this wasn’t like last year: last year, it was a one-on-one game between Finland and Sweden and a tug-of-war between public and jury. This year, we had a lot of favorites. Marko was the favorite, but if Joost wasn’t disqualified, maybe the points would’ve been even more distributed.

But you know what? Marko actually got the best possible result you can get in Eurovision. People adore you, you become a legend and your country doesn’t have to deal with EBU’s bullshit. You get the best of both worlds and it doesn’t cost you a cent.

Also, consider that Marko accepted his 2nd place graciously and maturely, went back home and was welcomed by basically the whole Zagreb (Let3 were there too! Kings supporting a king, very fitting). And in an interview, he said something like “I don’t care about the jury points, because the jury doesn’t come to my concerts”. Which proves he is:

a mood

a king

the truth oracle

everyone’s spirit animal

the winner of the people

the coolest guy ever

So, Croatia: I understand your disappointment, the jury system REALLY needs to change. And no, you won't host Eurovision next year. But consider that you're everyone's favorite country now. And you won't have to deal with whatever shit will happen in 2025! So sit back, relax, may your tourism thrive and your quality of life be high.

And if all of you people really enjoyed Baby Lasagna, please consider he has a YouTube channel and there are two other songs, besides Rim Tim Tagi Dim. One criticizes social media and the influencer system, while the other is a piece of great life advice from the title: “Don't hate yourself, but don't love yourself too much”. Thank you, king, for being so real.

And in case you’re wondering, yes, they’re both huge bops.

Do your magic, people: subscribe to his channel, stream his songs, watch his videos, shower him with love and, most importantly, meow back.

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Switzerland: a contest that can live up to its promise

In the end Switzerland won. And it’s a good victory, you know? You might not like the song, but consider that Nemo sang pop, rap and opera, all while jumping on that rotating platform-thingy and running all over the stage. And they even bent back, while keeping a high note and rotating. I can’t even keep a high note by standing still, let alone by doing all the stuff they did.

Also, this is the first victory for a non-binary person, so great for them. And basically no one knew Nemo before Eurovision, so the show came back to its roots, by giving fame to an unknown artist.

Last but not least, in an ironic turn of events, this victory is the least political thing that happened on that stage. In the most polarized, political show ever, the winner is the quintessential neutral country. Almost poetic, in a way.

And this victory is also a huge slap in the face for the EBU: in the end, it wasn't its rigid adherence to the policy that made the show non-political, it was the jury’s vote. How the tables have turned.

But there is another reason why this victory is good after all and it’s because it’s a hopeful one. The winner isn’t famous, they didn’t harass anyone, they didn’t use money to win, they brought nothing besides their identity, a kind heart and a flag they had to sneak in because of the weird “flag rule” EBU pulled out.

And I would like to remind you that, during their victory speech, Nemo said this:

"I hope this contest can live up to its promise and continue to stand for peace and dignity for every person in this world".

I think it’s a speech that tells everything about this year’s show. This year, the contest didn’t live up to its promise: it put people in unnecessary danger, it brought tension, it made it political. EBU’s strictness led to a lot of consequences, the exact ones it tried so desperately to avoid.

As a result, no one enjoyed their time. I didn't enjoy my time. When Sunday came, I was relieved that the week was finally over and I was able to leave Eurovision behind. I didn't feel an ounce of the usual post-Eurovision nostalgia. I was just glad it was over.

And it's sad and unfair, because Eurovision isn't this. Eurovision is a perfect little window of peace and unity, away from the chaos of the world. For a few hours, three evenings a year, we can leave the real problems behind and focus on silly ones, like which country should win, which should be forever ashamed and which artist will become a legend.

This year, it wasn't like that. This year politics found its way in and wrecked everything. What was supposed to be a silly, funny, lighthearted show became so heavily politically charged, it broke under the weight.

And now that I think about it, Nemo breaking the trophy is the perfect metaphorical representation of this year's competition.

Just like that trophy, Eurovision is something frail and beautiful and mishandling can break it. And oh boy, the EBU truly mishandled it. Even if it was an accident, even if it wasn't done on purpose, the trophy is still broken. The show is broken.

But when asked about their broken trophy, Nemo didn't mourn it: Nemo gave words of hope. Maybe the broken trophy can be repaired. And maybe Eurovision can be repaired too.

How? Well, maybe by starting to learn when and how to apply rules. By using common sense and sensibility. And by checking the world outside too. If we want Eurovision to keep being that small window separated from real world problems, we can't just ignore them: we need to check them and react accordingly.

And if we have to break a rule to guarantee peace and safety, then so be it. One broken rule is not as important as safety and unity.

After all, what makes Eurovision isn't a set of rules: it's the artists, with their talents, their messages, their hopes, their voices, their dreams. They are Eurovision. They are the pull that draws everyone in. They are the reason why people are "united by music". Not because a rule orders them to, not because of the EBU: because of these artists.

Maybe the EBU can start from that. Maybe it can start by looking at the human aspect. Maybe it can start by going out and looking around. And maybe it can learn to take more care of the artists who are the foundation of the show.

And maybe, maybe, they will be able to repair Eurovision too.

See you, hopefully, next year.

[irlcats-bracket]

Bracket 3 Semifinals 1

Pricetag & Bandit vs Simon

PRICETAG

also named price in another submission

shes fat shes a terrible bitch and shes the love of submitter's life. they dont technically know her breed but she looks like a calico kinda. white and black and brown all over. their favorite spot to kiss her is the little brown diamond on top of her head, but she has all kinds of pretty markings. she'll cuddle submitter but not their parents and hisses at anyone else. hence the bitch. its SO funny. she doesnt "meow" so much as she chirps and yells. u touch her n its the worlds loudest MRAP. submitter leaves for work and they go "bye price!" and she goes "meep" and they say "i love you!" and she goes "mow" and it always makes them smile because she rarely does it to anyone else. shes so fat. she has a big ol premidorial pouch because shes 100% indoor and u can hear her claws go clicclicclic on the floor because shes so heavy. she likes to climb on peoples back. she chases moths but no other bugs and likes to make friends with neighborhood critters. she hates bellyrubs from everyone but submitter. if they leave their door open at night she creeps in and lays in the worst possible spot and makes it impossible to sleep. she makes the best bread loaf. shes so fucking round. SPHEREICAL. submitter love her more then anything ❤❤❤❤❤❤ (here submitter said that i can shrink it if i want to but no fucking way i am shrinking things abt a cat aside from their name maybe)

shes named after a canadian hockey player. submitter hates hockey. thanks uncle C dhsbdjjsjsjsjs

PROPAGANDA

THATS MY FUCKING CAT!!!!

GO VOTE FOR MY CAT!!!!!

how could you possibly vote against this face 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 shes the roundest, bitchiest cat in the whole world and shes my best friend. stealer of cream cheese and hearts.

heres a small collection of price pictures where i think she looks exceptionally round

vote for price orb. shes practically a perfect circle. what more could you want

also look how polite she is

BANDIT

submitter's sweet baby boy. He passed away recently, and submitter misses him dearly. He was the softest cat they'd ever pet, and that's not just them being biased. His fur was silk. He was the friendliest cat too, and when he heard new voices he was always up to come meet people. He also enjoyed being around people, and you could always find him in a room with the family. He enjoyed terrorizing the family dog whenevr he got riled up (dont worry, she enojoyed it too), and he loved to bother submitter's parents when they started working from home. Any call submitter had with their folks, he would always make a background appearance, yelling quite loudly. He also had some of the loudest snoring theyve ever heard, and they're so lucky to have a small audio recording of him sleeping. Submitter had him since they were 8, and he was nearly 17 years old when he passed away. Submitter tries to sleep with a crook in their knee so if he's ever lonely, he can come cuddle.

SIMON

he's two years old but still looks like he's six months old. he also recently cost his father and submitter 4k because he likes to eat random stuff off the ground :) luckily he's adorable, loves to beat them all up in the morning to wake us up, and his little meows sound like, "ba-hoo!"

PROPAGANDA

he is scared of everything that is not his mom, dad, or brother. everything else is to be treated as an very scary, dangerous enemy

he once cost us over 4,000 dollars in vet bills because he loves to try to eat random stuff off the ground. my fiancé and i both work minimum wage so you can imagine how happy we were

he went missing for 15 hours once because he pushed through a window screen and jumped. he is the last cat who would ever willingly go outside so wtf simon ....

he is a gremlin who thinks the world revolves around him (it does)

he loves letting me dress him up in hats, dresses, and shirts!

he loves to lick my fiancés face at 5am and will dig up the covers to get to him

he helps himself to any glass of water left out, even if you're also drinking it

he doesn't understand why people aren't always willing to share their food with him- he wants some!! give him a lil taste!

he also sat like this once ?

anyways i reached the mobile photo limit i hope you like my boy!!

SIMON SWEEP

[samyelbanette]

In May 2021, I saw some random shitpost saying “Finland’s Eurovision act is giving the emo kids everything they want.”

Being an MCR stan at the time, I was like hm? well, I’m an emo kid. let’s see what this is about.

I was pleasantly surprised to discover that I could watch the recording of the Semifinal, legally, on Peacock. I had watched ESC once before, in 2016. But for years after that, there was no way to watch the contest in my country (at least, not without a special cable television package that I obviously didn’t have 😭). It’s never been a popular show in the United States. But.

I saw Blind Channel perform Dark Side and I immediately thought omg, they sound just like Linkin Park. I tend to think of LP as a nu-metal band, and not an emo one. But I went through a huge LP phase back in high school, so ofc I loved the song.

I demanded that my friend (who, like most Americans, had never heard of ESC up until that point) come over and watch the Grand Final with me. He went out and ordered a copy of Violent Pop the next day.

….Ironically, it took me longer to get into BC. Like. The day after ESC ended, I watched the Died Enough For You MV on YouTube, and I thought it was great. But my mind was (hyper)focused on someone else.

Måneskin won ESC 2021, and I developed an immediate special interest in them (along with a huge crush on Damiano lol). This house was in a Teatro D’Ira lockdown. I had no interest in listening to anything else but that - and Il Bello Della Vita - on repeat. I watched all the interviews and obsessively worked on a Damiano/Reader fanfic.

But then in August, something happened. My laser focus on Må began to fade. Balboa was released as a single. BC performed at Allas Sea Pool. And suddenly I was reading Niko/Joonas fics every day.

My one-track mind had switched to a different track. And there was no going back.

In October 2021, I wrote Flufftober With Blind Channel (a huge reader-insert oneshot collection). As of rn, that’s still my #1 most kudos-d fic on AO3. 😅 And then in December, I wrote my first Joeleksi fic, as part of a holiday gift exchange.

I watched Blind Channel perform on Finnish television for New Year’s Eve. And when February came, I watched them perform again at UMK 2022. I cheered for The Rasmus when they won the competition, but they never stole my heart. BC still owned it.

On March 3rd, 2022, I finally saw BC live for the first time. It was in Warrendale, Pennsylvania, on Day 1 of their tour with From Ashes To New. Their first performance on American soil.

And then on April 11th, 2022, I saw them again, at their headline show in New York City. I had the honor of meeting one of my fellow fanfic writers, pastlink! And then I met Niko and Joel after the show. 😍

It was one of the best days of my life.

Time continued to pass. ESC 2022 came and went. Kalush Orchestra were…fine. They deserved to win, but they didn’t stay on my mind after the credits rolled. Not like BC did.

LOTSAD dropped in July 2022, and it was everything I’d hoped it would be.

In October 2022, I wrote Flufftober With Blind Channel 2, this time focusing on M/M relationships.

On November 18th, 2022, I saw Måneskin live for the first time (ironic, given that I loved them first). It was at this show that I had the honor of meeting another BC writer, lnights, in person. 🖤

Then, in December 2022, I moderated my first ever fandom event - BC Blood Mass. There was some controversy in the beginning, but it ended up being a huge success. I’m still so grateful to everyone who participated.

On May 13th, 2023, the ESC Grand Finals came around again. And I finally got to do something, that I hadn’t been able to do in 2021 (or 2022): vote for Finland. 🇫🇮

On May 16th, 2023, I saw BC live for the third time, when they returned to the US and opened for Lacuna Coil. This time, I got a picture with Joel, Joonas, Olli, and Aleksi. It ended up on Joel’s Instagram story, and when I checked my notifications the next day, I got emotional.

Dozens of people from Finland and Germany and other places around the world, who I would’ve never encountered without this silly band, were saying:

Look. That’s Kelley. We know her. She’s our friend.

….And now it’s September. Goddamn. I’ve been in this fandom for two years now. I’ve written thirty-four BC fics. And I’ve made so many amazing friends. There have been many times where y’all have been kinder to me than my own family. I’m so happy to have gotten to know all of y’all.

…And there’s still more to come!!!

BC Blood Mass is coming back for December 2023. BC’s fifth album is going to drop sometime in 2024.

I can’t wait to see where this Wolfpack takes me next. 🐺🇫🇮🖤

[sole-cuore-amore-e-droga]

Bulgaria brings a mentally reassuring anthem to Rotterdam 2021

I’ve said so that VICTORIA herself sort of agreed to have done “Tears Getting Sober” if she was allowed to, but for one I have to thank that EBU said that the artists can’t have their 2020 songs back? You’ll see why when I get to the review after two boring paragraphs of text with technical info, for the country that is Bulgaria!

ARTIST & ENTRY INFO

Victoria Georgieva (or VICTORIA, but I can’t be arsed to continuously capitalize her name so I’ll just say Victoria from now on) was born a singer, for she started to sing at the age 11, went to a specific school of angel voices (no really that’s what it was called), and tried to go to the X Factor while a liiiiiittle too young until realizing that she needed to wait for a few years, and wait a few years she did, and went on to the X Factor again.

She didn’t win, but she still got to sign a contract and sing some stuff in Bulgarian before she decided to rebrand, started singing in English, and completely decided that ballads is her style. She cannot really do upbeat most of the time. So you can’t really have a bop from her in the future. (Well except that there’s a couple of songs in her discography that I personally classify as “bops” but they’re more like... idek sad bops?? but they can be danced to, but I get her, she doesn’t do anything that’s more loud and upbeat and clubby and summery kind of - in short, nothing you can go “YAAASSSS QUEEEEEN” over to.)

The entry she ended up singing, “Growing Up Is Getting Old”, is what I can describe to be about overcoming the emotional twists and turns inside of you as you grow older, because as it turns out, it ain’t what you thought it would be - but if you push just a little further, you realize that if you’re growing up, maybe the life isn’t so bad, afterall - you are able to get up. Somehow. It was written as part of Boris-Milanov-led songwriting camp held during summer, and a lot of people seemed to be a part of it because multiple different folk have songwriting credits on the potential Bulgarian entries this year.

REVIEW

Let’s get this out of the way immediately. I prefer “Growing Up Is Getting Old” to “Tears Getting Sober”. The former sounds a lot less irritatingly underwhelming and a lot more positively overwhelming you with warm emotions and sunglow. “Tears Getting Sober” was a song I could never really connect with - maaaaybe the last chorus is much better on there, but it doesn’t do much for me either, I guess.

Their 2021 forray however is a much different kind of thing - once again, going for lyrical non-cliches, Victoria tells a tale about her inner turmoils and continuing in life, in a way that’s personal to her and also kind of relatable to all of us. We all have these moments of fear and anxiety and nervous systems aching. If only there was someone who’d tell us that we’re worth saving... thanks a lot Victoria, you’re the MVP. Filling in the void that Netherlands from last year had brought us but not anymore - another personal song about getting old and having those kind of feelings inside - and doing a great job at taking the baton in the right way (even with featuring the word “grow” in both of the titles, neat coincidence).

Not only the lyrics feel like a hug, the song just emulates ray of sunshine and golden glitter coming down from the sky, Molly Sanden style. The violins in the G major key playing so precisely, building up momentum throughout the entire song, slowly but surely - starting with the ticking clock in the first verse that may have subtle violin in there; and the first chorus is just so simple piano, and then the second chorus has a tinge of electronic something, and the last chorus goes full in with the backing vocals boosting the song, after Victoria performs the quite magnificent bridge... now I don’t have synesthesia but I associate music keys with colors, and to me G major would always come across as something yellow or orange - “Growing Up Is Getting Old” is a perfect example of why’s that for me. And obviously, Victoria’s love for harmony-humming (even if there’s just one instance of it after she sings “star crossed soul”) complements the song to a T.

And it turned out to be a much better choice than last year’s. Maybe finally a female ballad I am getting behind.

Now I wanna know why the bookies don’t appreciate THIS entry as much as last year?

Granted, now it’s 2021 and the environment is so much different, and the songs have changed, and the dynamics have changed, and now there’s suddenly more competition at stake. And for Bulgaria it fares quite much more underwhelmingly - well, at this moment they’re like 6th, which isn’t bad, but there’s a lack of sung praises coming its way, not quite a feat that “Tears Getting Sober” actually achieved, being the bookies fave right before the cancellation of last year. In general the year has been pretty dry for the previous winner picks like Iceland, Lithuania and this, but I can’t say that the previous winner bets from 2020 are all that dead either? Though I gotta say that Bulgaria wasn’t gonna win 2020 anyway, so it’s a lose-lose in this case.

Also I just can’t at that music video being a little dramatic at the beginning, with the cancellation of Eurovision being presented as if it were a worldwide disaster during which we all shall lock ourselves into bunkers and wait until the better days, eventhough the panini is not war and war supplies kit is not just enough to survive it. But it seems like that the world is quite literally falling apart, as evidenced by Victoria going through all kinds of pathways away from her living room, meeting a  (presumably) mini version of her somewhere in between, and literally surrounded by the shaking environment by the last moments of the song

before we realize it was just reality recursing from the TV’s point of view that Victoria was watching all along, and then she leaves the living room again, but in her world, everything is normal and she could just go wherever she wants by car. Even I can’t come up with a storyline ending that’s somewhat intertwined and all plot-twisty and more confusing than that. But props to her team I guess

Approval factor: Let’s say I somewhat approve this message. Follow-up factor: For the sake of argument let me just say that Bulgaria is moving on a great path, eventhough the former entry leaves me cold, at least the current entry keeps me warm at all times, like a cup of cocoa and a good blanket. Please Bulgaria, never run out of sponsors. Qualification factor: I’ve seen one or two people throw around the “surprise NQ” tag for this song and I don’t get why??? There’s no way that the tense atmosphere of semifinal 2 would sure-fire-ly kill Bulgaria, even if they have a lot less chances to win this year than they had the last one. There can be some shock NQs indeed though, and if there are, I am paging... uhhhhh Finland? Idk why but you might see what I mean if I ever get around to reviewing “Dark Side”. Bulgaria? Never. It may not win the semi but it will cradle around the top 7 somehow.

INTERNAL NF CORNER

That’s right, Bulgaria managed to do both.

At the time when one other of Bulgaria’s songs got released, within the *Special* Eurovision September 1st-onwards range, people naturally succumbed to their primal instinct of asking whether that’s her Eurovision song... only for Vic to probably announce this early on that no, it’s just *one* of potential ESC entries she’s harbouring. And the remaining potential ones were all on her debut EP. Who actually got a more well-orchestrated schedule for everyone to follow, and yet, people were much more keen to cling on the first EP song out of the gate, “Imaginary Friend”. Now I get that the fans of that song were super upset at the revelation that IF is not going, but it is a technically strong song for the sake of being a technically strong song, and I don’t want to think that Victoria is only forced to choose the songs that can win for her, so she’s such a sweetheart for gravitating towards a song she could dearly care about. So props to her team saving the initial winner for last to be revealed, lol.

Though wasn’t her personal favourite a Billie-Eilish-lite-upbeat-kinda-track Phantom Pain?

Which was also my personal favourite?

Look, I know that favouring the only non-ballad in the whole lineup (well “Ugly Cry” is also not quite a ballad but its beat is kinda so-so, so I tend to ignore it) is kinda sus, also, y’all are sick to death to Billie Eilish comparisons, but I do believe that Billie would never be able to do an “Imaginary Friend” while Victoria could do a “Lovely”. This makes me remember the cover art of Billie’s debut album where she sits on her bed, dressed in white, and so is Victoria on this very MV, with strange shit going on behind her in the mirror. To the mirror, her reflection acts creepy, back again.

The other 2 I don’t feel like caring about enough, sure they got their cred, sure there’s one entry properly crediting Milanov (who seems to not have an actual entry this year that’s purely attributed to *him*, as opposed to 3 last year, 2 of which were performed by acts that returned this year????), sure there’s the funny thing about having a funeral song where out of this and Finland only Austria managed to send a quote unquote “funeral” song, but I think the funeral song would’ve sounded better if the pre-section of it on the “Phantom Pain” video was THE “funeral” song itself, and not whatever was that other funeral song.

In between there was a public sort of survey where people could submit feedback and positive words to Vic’s choices to help her decide - I didn’t get to vote but I feel fine with the winner eitherway, and that counts for something! And the end result was revealed at the very end of Victoria’s very own rooftop concert.

The colors on the circle thingy of this, they were meant to symbolize all Bulgarian entries up to Victoria’s 2nd one, in pictograms that kind of reminded me of Coldplay attributing every song on ‘Mylo Xyloto’ its own little symbol.

The concert was not only full of music and also adverts for the inaugural sponsor iCard (that also included some element of foreshadow in between the suspense, you’ll see why), but also the Bulgarian folk talking before each song, saying all the positive nice words they can for Vic; that she’s talented, and that they were so excited that Bulgaria was doing well in the odds last year prior to cancellation, bla bla bla... also some people were proud of voting for Bulgaria outside Bulgaia, and they made puns about the forthcoming songs on the concert that they were introducing, and so on, and there was also someone called Dara, whom I really want to be sent by Bulgaria one day to show off that they’re not afraid of doing trashy-esque bops that don’t necessarily win

Also they reminded me that Lucy from No Angels (aka the sole reason Bulgaria 12′d Germany in 2008) still exists.

Also Azis.

There was also an intermission where Eurovision 2021 acts could say all the nice words to Victoria on their own part. And several artists chose to... how shall I put it... use up their several seconds rather interestingly. Like how The Roop would say something real quick only to delve into more of their usual “let’s dance, let’s discoteque! *hand scissors* ;P” self-promo, and Senhit carelessly being allowed to say whatever she wants in Italian without subtitles <3 Sorry sis, they’re only given to people from another white-green-red flag-color country.

About the iCard foreshadow... so there’s their advert about Victoria waiting in the line to get something in the Soft Vocals Store, and people ahead of her giving her money the standard oldfashioned way, and the old lady at the counter is... slow, to say the least. After a good amount of time spent waffling around, Victoria finally pulls out the iCard application and pays for the imaginary items she wants, then narrates some stuff about said application, and a Eurovision entry of hers plays when the old lady is at home, spending time in front of TV enjoying the music. Before the concert, the song that played was��“Tears Getting Sober”. The advert played once more before Victoria’s big entry decision and entry MV reveal, and in place of the 2020 entry, “Growing Up Is Getting Old” was the one that sounded out loud... Now you may think that there were attempts at some sort of spoilage here, but after that ad before the concert EP NF result, there was this other advert starring Victoria that played “Imaginary Friend” at the end, a last-ditch effort to trick viewers into going “see? just because that ad played the chosen song doesn’t mean it’s the chosen song!! this song could as well be a chosen song as well!!” yeah no shut up GUIGO IS the chosen song kthxbyebye.

ANY LAST WORDS?

Having said all that praise, I actually have “Growing Up Is Getting Old” fairly low on my ranking. It’s just because the year is so damn good and I have a lot more songs to care about more than this, but I appreciate the gesture that this singer is sending very much. Good luck on your road to conquer Europe, Victory-ia, I’m sure you get the best of the experience and all, because you would deserve it.

[bountyofbeads]

https://www.theplayerstribune.com/en-us/articles/sue-bird-megan-rapinoe-uswnt

"What’s it like to have the literal President of the literal United States (of literal America) go Full Adolescent Boy on your girlfriend? Hmm. Well… it’s WEIRD.”

Sue Bird calls out Trump in hilarious and touching tribute to girlfriend Meghan Rapinoe. 👏👏👏👏

"Hi!! @S10Bird here. This is my WC Semis preview. Title was supposed to be “So the President F*cking Hates My Girlfriend (& 10 Other Things I Want You to Know Before the World Cup Semifinals)” but we ran out of space. My bad. Thanks for reading. GO @USWNT."

Hi!! Sue here. This is my World Cup Semifinals preview. The title was supposed to be “So the President F*cking Hates My Girlfriend (and 10 Other Things I Want You to Know Before the World Cup Semifinals)” but we ran out of space. My bad. Thanks for reading. GO USWNT.

(1) I’m back!! I was done, I swear!! No, really, I SWEAR. Last year I broke my nose, and then I wrote about it, and then I seriously did think that was going to be it for me in the writing game. I remember telling my editor here something like, “It would take the President of the United States going on a hate-filled Twitter spree trolling my girlfriend while she was putting American soccer, women’s sports, equal pay, gay pride and TRUE LOVE on her back, all at once, scoring two majestic goals to lead Team USA to a thrilling victory over France and a place in the World Cup SEMIFINALS, for me to ever even thinkabout writing again.” But I’m a woman of my word. So here I am.

(2) First of all, I’ve gotta get this on the record, if it’s not already clear: I’m SO proud of Megan!!

And the entire damn USWNT. That’s why I’m writing this article, mainly. So if you could do me a favor, let’s just take a second, for real, and appreciate this RUN my girl’s been on?? Like, take away all of the “extra” stuff — and just focus for a second on the soccer alone. Two goals against Spain. Two goals against France, WHILE A GUEST IN THEIR MAISON. I want to hit on a lot of other topics while I’m here, and trust me I will — but I just think it’s also really important not to forget what this is actually, first and foremost, about, you know? It’s about a world-class athlete, operating at the absolute peak of her powers, on the absolute biggest stage that there is. It’s about an athlete f*cking killing it. 

It’s about Megan coming through.

(3) O.K. so now that that’s out of the way, I’ll answer The Question.

The one that’s probably most on your mind. And by that I mean: What’s it like to have the literal President of the literal United States (of literal America) go Full Adolescent Boy on your girlfriend?  Hmm. Well… it’s WEIRD. And I’d say I actually had a pretty standard reaction to it: which was to freak out a little.

That’s one thing that you kind of have to know about me and Megan: our politics are similar — after we won the WNBA title in Seattle last season, no way were we going to the (f*cking) White House! — but our dispositions are not. And as we’ve been talking through a lot of this “stuff,” as it’s been happening to her, you know, I’ll be honest here….. some of it scares the sh*t out of me!!

I mean, some of it is kind of funny….. but like in a REALLY? REALLY? THIS GUY??? kind of way. Like, dude — there’s nothing better demanding your attention?? It would be ridiculous to the point of laughter, if it wasn’t so gross. (And if his legislations and policies weren’t ruining the lives of so many innocent people.) And then what’s legitimately scary, I guess, is like….. how it’s not just his tweets. Because now suddenly you’ve got all these MAGA peeps getting hostile in your mentions. And you’ve got all these crazy blogs writing terrible things about this person you care so much about. And now they’re doing takedowns of Meganon Fox News, and who knows whatever else. It’s like an out-of-body experience, really — that’s how I’d describe it. That’s how it was for me.

But then Megan, man….. I’ll tell you what. You just cannot shake that girl. She’s going to do her thing, at her own damn speed, to her own damn rhythm, and she’s going to apologize to exactly NO ONE for it. So when all the Trump business started to go down last week, I mean — the fact that Megan just seemed completely unfazed? It’s strange to say, but that was probably the only normal thing about it. It’s not an act with her. It’s not a deflection. To me it’s more just like: Megan is at the boss level in the video game of knowing herself. She’s always been confident….. but that doesn’t mean she’s always been immune. She’s as sensitive as anyone — maybe more!! She’s just figured out how to harness that sensitivity.

And I think Megan’s sensitivity is what drives her to fight for others. I think it’s what drove her to take a knee. The Megan you’re seeing now? It’s the stronger version of the one who knelt in the first place. All the threats, all the criticism, all the fallout — coming out on the other side of that is what makes her seem so unfazed by the assholes of the world now.

I think in trying to help others, Megan has cemented who she is.

(4) A few 100% random and 100% unrelated facts, presented without commentary.

Donald Trump has never invited a WNBA champion to the White House.

In 2017, when South Carolina Women’s Basketball — coached by a black woman (the legend Dawn Staley) — won the national championship, they were not initially invited to the White House.

In 2019, when Baylor Women’s Basketball — coached by a white woman (also a legend, Kim Mulkey) — won the national championship, they were invited to the White House with no issues.

Stumbled across this cool website the other day. Check it out 🙂

(5) Alright….. yeah. It’s time. It’s definitely time.

We Need To Talk About Megan’s Pink Hair.

I’m actually just going to say this out loud, and put it all the way out there, since the Players’ Tribune is a space for honesty (plus there’s this whole Atlantic Ocean between us): The hair?? I was….. AGAINST it. Phew!! That felt really good to say. I was against it. I thought it was too impulsive and I voted no. (LOL not that I actually got a vote — our relationship when it comes to Megan’s fashion is based on what you might call a “modified democracy,” where we both give our opinion and then Megan does what she wants.)

But yeah, my feeling was — you’re going to the World Cup!! To do great things!! And hopefully, if all goes well, you’re going to be memorialized in all of these pictures that will be around for….. EVER! Plus, blonde hair is like — Your Signature Thing!! You look amazing blonde. We know that looks good on you. Pink? Megan, are you sure?Don’t you think you might regret this??

And Megan was just, like, Nope. World Cup. Pink hair. I’m in. Let’s get it. She got it colored the DAY before she left, without a care in the freaking world. I mean….. if you were ever wondering what the Rapinoe Lifestyle was about….. that’s it, truly.

(Also, I love it now? Now that’s it’s settled in and looks a little more purple. Don’t tell Megan.)

(6) Back to the France game for a second. A few thoughts here.

One, I’m not sure if you saw — but, my girlfriend?? She shrugged off the Rude Man on Twitter, and managed to play….. I’d say pretty well 🙂

Two, France!! They were incredible. I really hope some of them are reading this, because I just want them to know that. They stayed so damn tough, I thought, through the whole tournament — and that’s with the pressure of hosting the event, too. The way they persevered to make it a match, late, after getting down two goals early?? I mean, don’t get me wrong — I was 100% on MANIAC mode, cheering for our squad. Obviously. But I still hated that anyone had to lose.

Three, on the advice of counsel I’d like to issue a formal apology to everyone who was on the plane with me last week, and had to watch me fistpump like a bozo after each of Megan’s goals, and smash the REFRESH button on my phone like a….. well, also a bozo, after my bars started cutting out in the second half.

It won’t happen again except let me be clear it might.

(7) YOU GUYS: WHAT ARE PENALTY KICKS.

No, seriously — I could not imagine taking one??????

I think the more I watch soccer, and the more I find these ways to apply it to what I know about basketball, the better feel I get for the game. Like, for example, as a point guard, I have a pretty strong sense of floor-spacing….. and I think that ends up being extremely relevant for soccer. I’m definitely starting to “see the field,” you know? And I’m noticing the way that plays develop, and stuff. (They just kind of develop.)

O.K. so that’s my plus column.

My minus column? PENALTY KICKS. Like, I guess they’re kind of like free throws? Only if there was someone trying to BLOCK your free throw, and you had to use your foot (??), and oh yeah if you missed it you’d never forgive yourself and have it haunt you for the rest of your LIFE?? So what I’m saying is it’s not like a free throw at all.

I don’t want Megan to turn out to be an alien from another planet, but I’m just going to say the truth of how I feel right now: If you’re good at penalty kicks, you’re a f*cking alien from another planet.

(8) I had a long thing prepared here about the equal pay debate.

I was planning on ���making some points” and “going in.”

But then I thought about it some more, and to tell you the truth….. I’m kind of done with that.

If you’re not on the right side of this fight, and advocating fiercely for equal pay — whether it’s in soccer, or basketball, or in any other industry, and across every intersectional boundary — then I just straight-up feel bad for you.

Because you’re sad, and wrong, and going down.

I feel that in my bones, increasingly, over these last several months — having seen my colleagues in the W show we mean business on a new CBA. 

I feel that in my bones, increasingly, over these last couple of years — having seen our NBA counterparts start (START!) to stick their necks out for us, more and more, in solidarity and out of respect.

And I feel that in my bones, increasingly, right f*cking now — having seen these indestructible USWNT women stand up for themselves and (this seriously can’t be stressed enough) crack a LAWSUIT over the heads of U.S. Soccer while they go out and grind for a freaking World Cup.

Oh right and they literally are MORE PROFITABLE THAN THE MEN.

COOL!!!!!!!!!

TLDR: Pay us.

(9) They told me I should make some predictions!! LOL.

In the first semi, I’ve got those frisky lil AMERICANS taking down England, by a score of 2-0. I feel like we’re vibing right now, and the offense is really humming, so yeah — this one’s USA all the way. (QUICK NOTE ON METHODOLOGY: I may have just made the prediction that results in me getting a summer trip to Paris.)

In the second semi….. O.K., so, I won’t reveal my sources, but I heard this major scoop that the Netherlands might be a team people are sleeping on?? But then I guess on the other hand, you also have Sweden, who thumped us in the Olympics….. so that’s a “cool final” maybe….. I don’t know, I feel like these teams probably know each other really well. Like a classic neighborhood beef. How am I doing? Should I keep faking it here? Let’s go with the Netherlands, 2-1.

(10) Wait let’s do a story time.

I’ve been lucky enough to hear a few awesome stories about the USWNT in my day, so I feel like — since you’ve put up with my decidedly non-expert World Cup semifinal preview, and been so cool about it — I owe you one of them here. 

I’ll actually tell you my favorite.

Alright so it’s halftime of the 2015 World Cup Final….. and of course, if you’re reading this, you know the score: 4-1 U.S. Carli has her hat trick, Lauren has one, and Japan has their one. And I think we’re all among friends at this point, so let’s just be real: It wasn’t even THAT close. It was over, dudes. World Cup? Over. Amazing!! Party!!

Except: these world-class athletes being these world-class athletes….. there is noooooo off switch in SIGHT. These women are in the locker room at half time, and they are taking it as seriously as if they were tied at one. People are talking strategy, going over plays, breaking down miscues — doing the whole bit, straight up, just biz as usual.

And then…..

And then there’s Megan.

She’s sitting there….. and she’s seeing everyone gameplan, and keep their game-faces on, and Do The Normal Halftime Thing..… and she gets it. Of course she gets it. But, like — still, you know?? Still. There is something inside of her that just….. CANNOT deal. Cannot deal with the ceremony of it all. Cannot deal with the bullshit. And she tries hard to fight it, tries not to say anything….. tries to stay somewhat relaxed. 

But then at some point the girl just….. I mean….. come on.

She can’t help herself:

 “WE’RE GONNA WIN THE WORLD CUP,” she blurted out. 

“WE’RE. GONNA. WIN. THE. WORLD CUP!!! 

WE’REGONNAWINTHEF*CKINGWORLDCUP!!!”

(11) So there’s this thing that I invented called Megan Goggles.

They’re hard to explain, but I think I’ve almost got it. I think it’s like….. O.K., so: Megan, she just does things sometimes. Do it….. then love it….. then — later, at the very end, if there’s time — worry about it. That’s her M.O. Me, on the other hand….. I’m nothing like that. I’m more of the worry about it first….. and then later, if there’s time, do it type. So the idea of Megan Goggles, I guess, it’s this idea of like — they’re this thing that I put on, and it helps me loosen up a bit?? And just open my eyes, and see the world from Megan’s Extremely Megan perspective.

And anyway, in the beginning of our relationship, I think I would use “Megan Goggles” as a sort of running joke — when we’d be doing that thing couples do where we play these almost cartoon versions of ourselves. In our case: free-spirit Megan and practical Sue.

Except now….. I wouldn’t be so practical!! So it would be like: 

[Megan walks into the closet with some scissors, then confidently walks out…..] 

[Sue puts on Megan Goggles…..] 

Sure, Megan! Absolutely let’s call that t-shirt you just cut a hole in “a look.” 

Or: 

[Megan suddenly decides that she needs to dye her eyebrows platinum blonde…..] 

[Sue puts on Megan Goggles…..] 

Wait, Megan, nevermind — I take it back that it’ll look like you have no eyebrows! And I can totally see what you mean when you say, “Trust me, they’ll pop.”

And so on and so on — and it just sort of became this, like, shorthand experience. I’d put on my Goggles, and I’d be on this amazing vacation….. to a place where I was someone a little left of my own center. Where I was someone who thinks like Megan thinks.

And then eventually I came to realize the obvious: that Megan Goggles are a lot more than some cute running joke between us, about fashion choices or whatever — and that they’re actually this kind of skeleton key to Megan herself. Or, put another way: When I put on my Megan Goggles?? What I’m really doing, I think, is learning to understand her better — and, if this even makes any sense: I think at the same time, I’m learning how to understand myselfbetter as well.

But wait I’ll get to my point. I’m bringing all this up, and trying to explain this crazy (or I hope not that crazy!!) concept, because last Friday — in the lead-up to that USWNT game vs. France, and then during the game itself, and then after??

I swear, it was like the most amazing thing happened: It was like the entire country, all at once, for this one fleeting and improbable but also somehow very very very very possible moment….. PUT ON MEGAN GOGGLES.

It was like the entire country, all at once, said — Soccer? YES. Women’s soccer? YES. An openly gay superstar swagging out with two goals and batsh*t celebrations and leading us to a huge-ass win in women’s soccer? YES. That same openly gay superstar not just taking some preapproved, basic level of pride in her sexuality, but actually being the world’s biggest most kissable goofball queen and literally crediting her sexuality for those two goals and her batsh*t celebrations and our huge-ass win in women’s soccer? YES. 

This is the American flag now, someone tweeted — and it’s a photo of my girlfriend, BEAMING ear to ear, smiling her BOOBS off on a football field, mugging for the camera, weird-ass dye job and all — just totally and completely over-goddamn-flowing with excellence? YES.

So anyway, look — I guess here’s my point:

I’m closer to 40 than 30. I’ve only been legally permitted to get married in the last handful of years. I’m a worrier, an overthinker, and — if it’s your type of thing — a 3x WNBA champion.

But on Friday? It was like for this one, perfect, fleeting, uncomplicated day….. I was everyone.

I was happy. 

I was crazy.

I was PROUD.

I was pretending to know about soccer.

I was a little overwhelmed. 

I was pretty damn American.

And I was in love with Megan Rapinoe.

Sue Bird, Seattle Storm

https://t.co/A2dJrBIzRh

[allinmycorner]

We're almost at the end of the season! Our semifinals are set for next week and then we'll have the finals. It could be anyone's game but I have a feeling JoJo and Jenna will be lifting the Mirrorball Trophy at the end, especially now that one of her closest competitors is out of the competition.

This week was all about the music and legacy of Janet Jackson, who spoke with Tyra for a bit at the start. Apparently they are good friends and Tyra talked about how different she is on stage and off, embarassing Janet. She then got the show started and unfortunately, Janet did not perform. Tyra had teased a special guest during a dance routine and I thought Janet was going to perform virtually but it was just Kaitlyn Bristowe, who will be joining the pros during their tour next year.

Once again there were two rounds so let's take a look at the individual round first!

Olivia and Val: Her elimination was sad. I really thought she'd make it to the finals and serve as JoJo's real competition. Like Cody, she also has a good arc. She was good from the start but just got better though she struggled along the way. But it was clear the votes weren't there and people may still not have forgiven her enough to let her take home the mirrorball trophy. I hope Olivia is proud of what she's done and continues to grow as a person.

Jimmie and Emma: This elimination broke my heart. I thought Jimmie would make it to the finals and I was rooting for him to win, even if I think JoJo is a lock. Carrie Ann was right - he really embodied the show. He has shown amazing growth throughout the weeks and should be proud when he looks back over what he has done. And he always brought his whole soul to the dance, making his routines something special to watch. I am really sad to see him go and he will always be a winner in my book.

Amanda and Alan: The judges loved Amanda's jazz routine to "Miss You Much." But if I'm honest, it wasn't my favorite of her dances and I was underwhelmed. But luckily for Amanda, my opinion doesn't really matter in the end. She and Alan certainly had a tough time in rehearsals but it's Week 8. Almost everyone had hit the wall so it's understandable. Will she make it into the finals? I'm not sure. I think it might come down to her or Melora. And if that's the case, it's likely she'll make it in.

Melora and Artem: Melora dominated the floor in her paso doble to "If." Like Amanda and Alan, she and Artem butted heads during rehearsals. But they had a good heart-to-heart, venting their frustrations and fears to each other before hugging it out. And it absolutely worked. I loved their paso and once again admired how versatile a dance it is. I'm surprised she ended up in the bottom two and I hope she can make it to the finals but I don't think she'll survive if she ends up in the bottom two again next week.

Suni and Sasha: I know I wasn't confident about Suni making it past the quarterfinals but she proved me wrong with her samba to "All For You"! She's gained so much confidence and she's more relaxed on the floor. It's been so much fun to watch her growth and I hope she makes it to the finals. If she wins, it would be a great arc for the show and wouldn't be the obvious choice right now.

JoJo and Jenna: JoJo activated her fanbase after ending up in the bottom two last week and I guess they showed up for her. Which is another reminder that this is ultimately a popularity contest. At least JoJo can dance. Though I am not sure how much salsa content there was in her dance to "Feedback" but it certainly was more adult that even her dance last week. JoJo is growing up and embracing her more sexual side, giving a great performance. Which of course just continues the debate about if this is a show about ballroom dancing or just dancing in general.

Cody and Cheryl: I have to agree that their paso doble to "Black Cat" was absolutely their best dance. He's been pulling out the stops and I'm starting to think he may actually end up in the finals after all. I really think the battle is going to come down between Amanda, Suni and Melora for the final spot in the finals. Can Cody upset JoJo and take it all? Possibly - I'm sure there are just as many Peloton users as there are JoJo Siwa fans.

Iman and Daniella: Iman and Daniella certainly know how to give a great performance. It's one of the reasons why I consider him a lock for the finals, just like Nelly last season. Though their cha-cha to “Rhythm Nation” highlighted a recurring problem when the shows performs music by artists with iconic dance styles - finding a balance between the artist's style and the ballroom style. I'm not sure Daniella found it here and the cha-cha got lost in amongst the classic Janet Jackson moves but it was still a lot of fun that Iman handled pretty well.

Now onto the second round, which brought back the dance off. The couples were paired up and given a dance style they had to dance. One judge was assigned to judge the two couples and pick who they felt danced the best.

Dance Off Round 1

Battle of the spouses! Jimmie and Emma danced against Suni and Sasha as in a salsa dance-off to "Made for Now." Bruno judged them and ultimately declared Suni and Sasha the winners. While I love Jimmie and Emma, I agree with that decision. When it comes to the dance off, I base it off whoever manages to hold my eye the longest and Suni and Sasha certainly did that!

Dance Off Round 2

Battle of the spouses - Part Deux! JoJo and Jenna danced against Olivia and Val in a rumba dance off to "That's the Way Love Goes." While Carrie Ann declared JoJo and Jenna the winners, my eyes were always drawn to Olivia and Val. The couples were evenly matched but to me, Olivia and Val just edged out JoJo and Jenna. Too bad Carrie Ann didn't agree. Maybe Olivia would've made it to the semifinals.

Dance Off Round 3

Melora and Artem danced against Iman and Daniella in a foxtrot dance off to "Again." All the couples were honestly evenly matched but once again, my eyes went to Melora and Artem. This time, Derek agreed with me and chose them as the winners.

Dance Off Round 4

Amanda and Alan danced against Cody and Cheryl in a cha-cha dance off to "Together Again." This one was a draw for me as neither couple really drew my eye. I bounced between both. Len chose Amanda and Alan and I cannot agree or disagree on that.

Next week is the semifinals! At this point, I think JoJo and Iman are the only definite locks. What about you? Who do you think will make it into the finals?

Have a good weekend!

[littlecafe]

my suband thoughts pt. 2

(me trying to make this post for the 3rd time now) i realized i wrote like a 10 page dissertation instead and i refuse to post all that so i’m just going to copy over a few and keep the rest in drafts for when i want to reference them later

i will include results and elimination spoilers in this post so if you want to avoid those then don’t read this one...i try to keep things spoiler free but i just. have things to say about the results specific to round 2 :-)

jtbc finally striking down accounts on twitter and instagram for posting suband content....i think tumblr is safe bc this website is dead so i’ll continue posting i guess??? they haven’t done anything to that one youtube that’s been posting all the performance videos too so who knows

should i start with more contestant based random thoughts first

i was scammed by jtbc teaser editor bc they used a clip of jeongho “singing” into the mic in their preview and i waited 2 whole episodes (his team performed last in round 2) for me to find out it was a autotuned mic and a vocoder HELP MEEEE SAKJFDSKF at that point literally i could only laugh 

but he plays contrabass? he actually majored in contrabass? or maybe that was his old major, he’s still in school atm since wonsang said they go to the same one but he had educational training on it which is really cool

wait a minute......now that i think about it, that same teaser clip also spoiled the result of yeji winning bc they showed us that she was sitting in the waiting room during eliminations even though they haven’t performed yet (which means we knew her team won AND they already showed us all the matchups before so we also knew who she beat) WHO WAS EDITING THIS LMAO and it wasn’t even a accidental leak like she was sitting in the background, it was literally her reaction as the main focus and everything omg

hwang inkyu hello??? he’s movning’s bassist and he has a combined total of maybe 3 lines of airtime so far i wish he’d speak more bc i was so scared he’d get his ass kicked off the show bc he wouldn’t have been able to make a lasting impression but thank god hwanglin picked him up and seems like he’s going to be moving on with his team in the next round too (good for them the stage was so good i wanted to post it but haven’t yet..)

i used to really like movning’s music but their music direction went into a style i don’t listen to much so i haven’t checked into them recently, tbh i didn’t even know they auditioned until i looked at the full list of contestants later because their stage was cut out and only inkyu made it in

park dawool and hwang hyunjo both have galaxy brains and i would trust them with my life - yea i will not elaborate much because this post is already long even after i shortened it bc i talk too much but hyunjo making entire ppt slides? to present her theories and ideas? yea she’s absolutely ready for everything, for real she’s carrying her teams to victory

leenzy’s 2nd round team was so strong that i thought she got to pick really early (since they showed us all the team formations before airing the actual performances with the behinds for pickings and stuff) but she was actually the 2nd to last pair?? so all that’s left is her > the guy she chose to be her opponent, and then the poor guy that gets to pick from the remaining 6 or so and the final team of the ones unchosen

i was really shocked to find out no one wanted nakyung and ahkyung when i thought they were some of the best :-( i really still can’t tell if the mixing of male and female was a good idea esp since it was so skewed male in the first place ugh in round 2 it seems like the girls are getting shafted???

out of the 6 girls (that can be picked since 3 are frontmen!), 3 of them were not picked up until basically the very end when you don’t really have many choices left...nakyung (guitar), ahkyung (drums), and sujin (vocals)...and they’re all really good?? sujin ended up on the second to last team (basically the last team if we’re being honest since the actual last team is sadly the band of leftovers) and i just don’t understand why they weren’t picked up earlier...i can understand sometimes vocalists can get shafted because the show starts out with a loooot of vocalists so it’s hard to find a place for all of them but guitar? drums? u can definitely pick them...there’s literally only 7 or so drummers to begin with and one has been glued to crackshot the entire time

before the season started i was already terrified that the girls might get shafted because jtbc didn’t want girls auditioning in the first place but it was fine in the first round but now the second round made me think about that again.....it’s worse when they spin the whole “yes!! all girl band!! girl power!!!” when the reality was they weren’t picked up this whole time. annoying.

but this blame has to be shouldered by jtbc bc they wanted to keep it all boys but bc of public reactions (rightfully so) they decided to let female contestants audition but then it turned out that they barely pass any female contestants so it’s still terrible?!! i’ll just write this up that teams are still trying to figure themselves out and work with different people for now....maybe i’m just worried for nothing

not to absolutely curse myself but i think most of my favorites might make it at least to round 4 and i feel like a decent amount will make it to semis so haha /knock on wood but i really hope this stays true...i just need nokdu to continue taking care of hyunsang and make city pop bops together because the judges seem to like that so far

i’m just worried about demian....the judges keep saying he’s improved so much but why do i feel like they will cut him as soon as they need to eliminate more people.....i’m not as worried about round 3 (unless his team falls on their face) but round 4 is where i’m really scared...it’s the last round before the real deal and in season 1 the round 4 eliminations hurt so bad...they cut like 9 people or something

i mean he has his own career as a soloist so he doesn’t need a band like some of the other contestants but i think he really enjoys being in a team with others, honestly i don’t even know if his company would allow for him to be in a side band? even if he were to make it? like mone made it but all their members had solo careers and with the rose and woosung having problems it must be way they just decided to stop after the show unlike the other semis teams purple rain, lucy (they did have a vocalist change since joohyuk stayed with his current band gift), aftermoon (but i guess their dj dropped out i don’t know what happend with dpole??), and of course the winners hoppipolla all continued making music together under the same name

honestly if he makes it past the judges i don’t even know if the public would vote for him, atm his popularity with the public seems nonexistent? lol but to be fair, for most contestants it’s like that, but i do wish he’d become more popular

actually should i be more worried for haeun...she plays classic guitar and usually they don’t like classic leaning instruments but she showed she can sing so i hope she gets to stay

there’s danny too but i think i have given up on him making it until the end, the only way is if he manages to stay on teams that win so he’ll never be up for elimination but i feel like they’re out to get him TT_TT

but i’ve condensed my solid favorites to just demian, yeji, haeun, and jeongho...maybe i’ll pick a 5th eventually but i still like everyone i put in my first post! i really want hyunsang to make it far though bc the vibraphone brings me so much joy so he can be honorary 5th for now

about eliminations though, right now the judges have eliminated less than last season which is odd for jtbc because i feel they keep to their formats almost exactly so now i’m just ?????? if there’s still more people currently....what is going to happen? are they going to make the judges cut more during rounds 3 and 4? or they trying to equalize the semifinals teams since last year some teams had 4 people while others had 5? are they going to do the unthinkable and give us more rounds or semifinal teams? (i wish) anyways kinda scared to see what round 3 eliminations bring now...

the actual eliminations have been mostly as expected for me, still sad but i guess since i sensed it coming it became more a feeling of like “it couldn’t be helped” and also early eliminations hurt less in general because you had less time to get to know the contestants which is why i’d rather they just eliminate now than later if they were going to do it anyways like pls spare me the pain (but this is selfish and contestants probably want to stay as long as possible)

one surprising one was ludi??? he’s a dj but he’s literally done nothing wrong so far i was just wtf??!! when they eliminated him like it felt out of nowhere.....i feel like djs have so much potential on this show because of all the sounds they have access too but i guess the judges aren’t found of edm noise

also demian nation we rise at dawn, when he said “i’m not okay” like- this song really meant a lot to him too i hate thisssss

PLS I JUST WANT HIM TO WIN ONCE SO BADLY but next time, thanks to kfans detective work on the teaser, it looks like junseo (the smol piano child) picked him and jeongho to be on his team (maybe there’s a 4th member too??) and i am putting my faith into that team now pls help my winless boys

the fact that jeongho is winless is almost funny to me because it’s also obvious he’s a judges favorite but i mean that doesn’t translate to wins just i’m pretty sure he’ll make it to the end regardless (like bohoon the vocalist of purple rain lost all 3 /technically all 4/ rounds and still made it), he plays bass and no bassist has ever been eliminated on the show yet so cheers to that

round 4 was special since they switched over to a number format and no band versus band i don’t remember if the team with the top points were immune to elimination or not (or maybe just an unwritten rule bc why the heck would you do that to them after giving them the best score) but the rest of the teams were fair game - which is exactly why this elimination round is the scariest and not good for my heart especially after i had spent weeks watching them sing and have fun..........

ok now to complain about the judges AGAIN: why are the judges thoughts on what they want in a band so damn similar anyway?

i mentioned this in my first post already about how i dislike the judging atmosphere

but now i actually see it...in the numbers...like s1 there was a bit more taste diversity within the judges but now i feel like i’m seeing a lot of 4:1 or 5:0 scores so i went to see the breakdown out of the 15 stages we had so far

5:0 score - 6

4:1 score - 7

3:2 score - 2

compared to s1 (out of 14 only because they edited out one pair of battles completely so we never knew their score...)

5:0 score - 2

4:1 score - 6

3:2 score - 6

looking at that...it makes me feel sad....especially in the early 2 rounds it must be demoralizing to keep getting met with 5:0 loss and to be very honest and in s1 the number of 5:0 did increase in round 3 but that was when more teams started to figure themselves out so it makes sense that some would start pulling ahead

i’m really tired of listening to the judges agreeing with each other all the time, it makes it seem like the vision they have for the band was already set from day 1 unlike in s1 where everyone went in with no expectations because it was a brand new program, zero expectations, zero fans, just some kids wanting to make music and that’s what it should be like....music shouldn’t be limiting like this, the judges seem a little closed minded and now i’m 100% sure they have certain band styles in mind (i don’t know if it’s the judges only or if it’s jtbc producers too that’s causing this)

and i see other ifans saying this exact same thing on twitter now too so it’s not just me that picked up on this so safe to say we can’t all be extremely sensitive right

like the contradictory comments -

dongheon’s 2nd round team was told their original song was great and lovely but they brought nothing new to the table and that it was too standard, “just like any other rock/rock ballad song” when i thought the leenzy’s team (the one they went up against) also had a pretty standard? pop rock song? absolutely nothing wrong with it either, even the judges said that the song was not complicated at all but complimented them on their “band feel” so i guess as long as they enjoyed the vibe of the team and it suited the type of band style they have in mind it’s suddenly fine to make a simple song

i’m not saying her song was worse than his (i enjoyed both and seeing original songs performed make me very happy), i’m just a little confused at the judges comments for them both especially when one performed after the other, you really don’t see the bias in your words?

dawool was told his song composition in the first stage was a little too...nuanced(?) and that they wish he could just keep thing simpler even though he thought he toned down already and kept things simple, so round 2 he decided to just work with someone that makes mainstream music (davii) to fulfil what the judges want

seulong’s 2nd round team decided to go heavier on the instrumental side because they figured they didn’t want to go head to head with one of the favorite vocalists of the show (sorry yeji, ur my queen but ur also the judges’ queen too :---( ) but got criticized for a similar reason...yoo heeyeol saying that their composition was “fun for the brain” but if he were thinking about the general public he doesn’t think they would like this type of music, literally saying that the general public do not have the music knowledge or brain capacity to understand all the skill based playing going on musically and so won’t enjoy it because it wouldn’t appeal to their hearts................(ok sure call us dumb it’s true but won’t appeal to our hearts? music can sound intricate and fun? we can enjoy some funky strings guitar riffs without actually knowing all the details ya know)

they also kept telling them (seulong’s team) “oh i loved this” “i wish there was a band like this” “very cool” and gave them no votes??? if you wish a band like this exist then why? would? you? not? vote? for them??? like i can’t tell if those were consolation comments or what 

man judges rant ended up being long asf and i’m usually not affected by them and what they say but i was already feeling an odd vibe from the beginning and now seeing 5:0 after 5:0 after 5:0 really did it for me

overall, a not very fun post to read through it’s just more ranting than anything....i’m dying for a big pop off performance so i can successfully gauge the public opinion so far but i’ll refrain from posting my guess until at least the end of round 3, also i believe the team vibe usually outweighs solo popularity but we don’t know any teams yet (at least i can’t guess anyone yet like i could in s1) so we will still have to see!!

i’m pretty sure only i would look and read through these long ass posts of mine lol but if anyone makes it this far i hope you enjoy my crazy ramblings and see you in my suband thoughts pt.3 

[yahoo201027]

2017 Battle of the Week Tournament Bracket Released! Who Will Be Facing Who? 

Summer’s Almost Over. Meaning that Fall is almost here. School is about to open classes again. Cold air begins to take over. And oh yeah, we’re entering the General Election here. I.E. the Tournament Rounds in the 2017 Battle of the Week Tournament. Yes, we’re now only less than 3-4 months till the end of 2017 and of course, the Final Round in December. It’s been weeks since the Primaries ended and we already have Eight Candidates Left in the Open. That are Nico Robin (One Piece), Hinata Hyuga (Naruto), Rin Okumura (Blue Exorcist), Joseph Joestar (JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure), Asami Sato (The Legend of Korra), Star Butterfly and Marco Diaz (Star vs The Forces of Evil), and Milo Murphy). The Big Question here is from everyone is when the Quarterfinals begin? And Who will be facing who? Well...here it is.

Round 1 in the Quarterfinals Begins in the Alpha Party side begins on the week of September 3rd-9th of 2017 and it’s between the Characters of Nico Robin (One Piece) and Joseph Joestar (JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure). Two characters from two popular series that are currently celebrating their anniversaries. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure turned 30 years old this years as for One Piece, turning 20. It would be something if one of the two characters made it to the Semifinals while celebrating their anniversaries before 2017 is out of the picture.

Naruto and Blue Exorcist are no stranger to the Tournament Rounds with Rin Okumura, who won Third Place in 2014, hoping to win First this time. Of course, has to square off against Hinata Hyuga. Both fandoms are no stranger when it comes to the Tournament Round within the past years. Rin Okumura won Third Place back in 2014, of course, that was when he was in the Consolation Round, losing to Ichigo Kurosaki. 2017 has no consolation rounds, just to put that out there. The Naruto fandom however, things were improving when it comes to these rounds. Naruto back in 2015 was in the Semifinals but lost to Levi from Attack on Titan, thus ending up in the Bronze Match and won against Morty Smith from Rick and Morty. Sakura Haruno, a year later, got taken down by Saitama and landed her in the Consolation rounds only to lose in the Bronze Match against Linda Belcher from Bob’s Burgers. So call either fandom a “Veteran” when it comes to the Tournament Rounds. Either one of those guys, along with the fandom what I’m about to say next has to do some major improvements to head to the Final Rounds? But will it end up becoming the same result? You’ll find out once you vote in this very round on the Week of September 10th-16th.

We switch from the Alpha Party to the Bravo Party with both very surprising threats we seen in the Primaries earlier this year. Asami Sato was a major surprise to see in her first round against Star Butterfly back in April where the Star campaign thought they were going to have a clean sweep out of this one. Well, the tables had turned came Earth Day, April 22 as the polls came to a close. Thus, making Asami Sato a surprise threat and a wide path to becoming the Winner her group, Group C. Connie Maheswaran from Steven Universe tried to overthrow her but that failed. Thus losing her Runner-Up position to Star Butterfly, Asami’s Group C Rival. Milo Murphy, what to say about him. He lost in the first round against Marco Diaz back in March. But still got his way to the Quarterfinals as the Runner-Up, beating both Sterling Archer and Rigby for the spot. A fanbase that has a population of possibly the size of New Hampshire against a fanbase that just started with its first anniversary coming up in October. You’re probably thinking right now, “A big fandom against a small fandom? Ha! This will be easy.” Yeah, let me tell you about what happened in 2015 when the last person says that.

Yeah, don’t underestimate a growing fandom that is currently small. Milo Murphy’s Law is a growing fandom. Bob’s Burgers is a growing fandom and Tina Belcher back in 2015 was undefeated in landslide victories against Korra, Sinon, Beatrice, Dipper (possibly an upset), Morty, and Levi. Making her the only character taking the Battle of the Week Tournament to go 6 Wins and 0 Losses. And that probably got the Avatar fandom beginning to worry about. Brief History to pass along, Korra. She made her way to the Quarterfinals in both 2013 and 2015, but failed to advance. So they hope they don’t want to make the same mistake with Asami. And that was low voting turnout. Let’s hope Asami can handle a dose of Murphy’s Law when she’ll be taking on Milo on the Week of September 17th-23rd.

And lastly, for the Star vs the Forces of Evil fans...oh boy, this last one for the Quarterfinals is gonna probably be a doozy because the last two on the bracket includes the characters of Marco Diaz and Star Butterfly. Two Characters who are the protagonists, co-protagonists, of the series, friends, possibly more but I’m NOT going to be biased here. Let’s have a little point of history here. This isn’t the first time we have two characters from the same series facing off against each other. This will be the fourth time that this will be happening. With the most recent being the Semifinals last year between Garnet and Peridot from Steven Universe, which ended with Garnet advancing to the Final Round...only to end up losing to Roronoa Zoro. And we’re not gonna play the blame game on why Steven Universe would lose to One Piece? That’s in the past. This is now. Anyway, Star vs. Marco. If you’re a fan of the show and can’t choose either one of the two, I can’t blame you. But sadly, only one had to advance. The Quarterfinals is a “Winner Take All”, meaning that if you lose, you’re eliminated. From the tournament. Eliminated from the Tournament. Luckily for y’all, the fans over at Star vs The Forces of Evil, your match isn’t till the last week of September. So you got a solid three, four weeks to make a decision before the poll opens on September 24th. And that poll lasts till September 30th. So yeah, choosing between Star or Marco...tough choice. Really though choice. So yeah...good luck with that. Hope you made the right choice.

And that will be all from this update. I hope you get the idea on what’s coming up next as the Fall months commences along with the Quarterfinals. The Countdown to the Final Round has begun. And sooner or later, Eight Candidates, four from each side, will be down to the Final Two in December. With the Semifinals beginning on October 8th. And the Semifinals and the Final Round will last for Two Weeks. With Election Day on the night of December 15th around 8:00pm (Central Time). Treat this like an election like the one the US had last year, but without the divisiveness, that’s the one thing we don’t need. So yeah, that’s about it from this update and until, I bid you adieu.

[dillhome69-blog]

Jack M Silverstein’s Pro Football Hall of Fame Class of 2019

Later this month, the Pro Football Hall of Fame selection committee will take its list of 102 modern-era nominees — players and coaches — and cull from that 25 semifinalist candidates for the Class of 2019. In January, they will trim down to 15 finalists. On February 2, 2019, the day before the Super Bowl, the 48 voters will convene in Atlanta — site of the game — and bring the list from 15 to 10 and then 10 to 5.

They will then vote “yes” or “no” on each of the remaining five players. Any player receiving 80% “yes” votes makes the Hall of Fame.

For players and coaches on the list of modern-era nominees, making the semifinalist list of 25 is the first true step toward the Hall of Fame.

That’s because any person can nominate any player, provided that the player has been retired for five or more years and was voted to at least one Pro Bowl or one All-Pro team. Brad Biggs and I were among those who put Olin Kreutz on this year’s ballot, for instance, though Kreutz had been on before and is a true Hall of Fame candidate himself, as we’ll see below.

A much stranger nomination came last year when Steve Smith was on the list — not the heralded Smith of the Panthers, but the one from the Giants. He made the 2009 Pro Bowl and had some clutch catches in Super Bowl XLII, but few people consider him a Hall of Famer.

Therefore the cut to 25 is a significantly greater honor than just landing on the modern-era list.

In a way, this is the most difficult cutdown. While there might only be 10 guys in a given year who are legitimate Hall of Famers, there are 40-50 who can legitimately be considered worthy of that semifinal round.

I learned that the hard way. In this story, I will unveil my entire Hall of Fame ballot at each stage, starting with my top 25, which includes three Bears. In making the list, I had to ultimately make a top 40 list too, because there were 15 guys who I thought were soooooo close to being worthy of the 25 that I had to find a way to include them as well.

My methodology was to rank all of the players within their position groups, put the top-flight guys into the 25 first (including Gonzalez, Sterling Sharpe, Ed Reed and a few others), and then drop in the guys who I think we want to continue discussing based on positions.

For example, Kevin Mawae is my top center, but there are three other centers who I think are truly Hall-worthy: Kent Hull, Olin Kreutz and Tom Nalen. I had to then rank those three guys, and then decide how many of the three should be in my top 25.

My voting methodology will grow more clear as you read. Here are the nominees I would vote for this year, which I will then explain by position:

Hardest cuts from my top 40: Randall Cunningham, Steve McNair, Shaun Alexander, Kent Hull, Tom Nalen, Ty Law, Don Coryell

Semifinalists (25, announced this month): Donovan McNabb, Edgerrin James, Daryl Johnston, Torry Holt, Sterling Sharpe, Tony Gonzalez, Tony Boselli, Mike Kenn, Richmond Webb, Alan Faneca, Steve Hutchinson, Olin Kreutz, Kevin Mawae, Simeon Rice, Richard Seymour, Karl Mecklenburg, Wilber Marshall, Champ Bailey, Steve Atwater, LeRoy Butler, Ed Reed, Darren Woodson, Brian Mitchell, Steve Tasker, Clark Shaughnessy

Finalists (15, announced in January): James, Sharpe, Gonzalez, Boselli, Kenn, Webb, Faneca, Hutchinson, Mawae, Bailey, Atwater, Reed, Mitchell, Tasker, Shaughnessy

Round of 10 (chosen the day before Super Bowl LIII): Sharpe, Gonzalez, Boselli, Faneca, Mawae, Bailey, Reed, Mitchell, Tasker, Shaughnessy

Hall of Fame Class of 2019 (chosen the day before Super Bowl LIII): Sharpe, Gonzalez, Reed, Mitchell, Shaughnessy

Here are my explanations by position. Let the debate begin!

(Side note #1 — Here is my ongoing spreadsheet that I keep for my research. If there are small inconsistencies between the spreadsheet and the article in terms of rankings, that’s because I tinker a lot and changed the story but didn’t go back to update the sheet. Anyhow, feel free to take a look if you’re interested.)

(Side note #2 — There are three other candidates for the Class of 2019: safety Johnny Robinson from the seniors committee, and longtime Cowboys personnel guru Gil Brandt and Broncos owner Pat Bowlen from the contributors committee. All three candidates will be voted with the same “yes” or “no” process as the final five modern-era candidates, and will also require the same 80% “yes” vote for induction. All three can be elected. For more on Robinson, here is an interview with his long-time foe — and Hall of Famer — Lance Alworth.)

Photo by Al Messerschmidt/Getty Images

Top 25: Donovan McNabb

Top 40: Randall Cunningham, Steve McNair

Jack sez: This was one of the categories where I went around and around, since each guy has an edge over the other two.

Randall has the highest personal peak. McNabb has the best career and was the one of the three who I would have said most consistently throughout his career that he was a HOFer. McNair got the closest to a ring (one yard from OT in a Super Bowl), played the best in his biggest games and won an MVP (a co-MVP with Peyton Manning, which almost makes it bigger).

I had to pick McNabb for the top 25. He was the one guy I always thought was a HOFer during his career, measuring him against Manning and Brady.

I came very close to including both or either Cunningham and McNair and ended up removing them for others.

After that, I ended up dropping McNabb. I hate to say it, but the bar for quarterback is fantastically high, probably the highest of any position. I think we probably elect too many QBs to the Hall, and as I look ahead, there are two guys who I think have a great chance of getting in but who I would definitely not vote for: Eli Manning and Ben Roethlisberger.

I think Philip Rivers has a decent shot — he’s another guy I don’t think should be in. Coming up in the next decade will be four guys who are all going in, including at least two first ballot: Peyton, Brady, Brees and Rodgers.

In that context, I can’t give it to McNabb, Eli, Roethlisberger, Rivers, the spectacular Mike Vick, or two of my favorite QBs ever: Cunningham and McNair.

We’ll see what plays out for Cam Newton and Matt Ryan. My next QB going in is Peyton in the Class of 2021.

Photo by Robert B. Stanton/NFLPhotoLibrary

Top 15: Edgerrin James

Top 40: Shaun Alexander

Jack sez: The Hall merges halfbacks/running backs with fullbacks into a single category as “Running Backs,” but I’m going to split them because that’s how we think about them.

I love Shaun Alexander, and he just nudged my other top 40 candidates at running back: my guy Eddie George, the great Ricky Watters and the very talented Corey Dillon.

I think Edge is the best of the bunch, and I’ve got him going to the round of 15, which will be his third finalist selection in five years. He was a semifinalist the other two years.

Why Edge? He was just flat out better than the other guys, with a greater combination of skills. He’s got the most rushing titles of any of the nominees (two — Alexander has one), he’s got the most career rushing yards, the most yards per game, he’s one of the top two receivers (Watters) and he probably would have won a ring if he didn’t leave Indy. In fact, he might have even been Super Bowl MVP considering that Addai and Rhodes should have shared it.

Top 25: Daryl Johnston

Top 40: Larry Centers

Jack sez: A common theme for me with the Hall of Fame is the inequity in positional honors. Namely fullbacks, centers, and everyone on special teams. So it was disappointing but not surprising when I checked the Hall of Fame’s positional page and found that there is no true, modern fullback in the Hall.

We have to start somewhere, and Moose Johnston is a great starting point. He was arguably the best fullback of his time, paved the way for the NFL’s all-time leading rusher and started — and won — three Super Bowls. He deserves a top 25 recognition, no question.

Larry Centers was also arguably the best fullback of his time, albeit with different responsibilities. I’ll take Moose because his skill adhere to the position, whereas Centers’ standout statistic is valuable but more of a curiosity at the position (receptions for a fullback). Same idea as Mike Alstott — great player, but got a lot of recognition for the novelty (short-yardage touchdowns) rather than the blocking.

But here is my question: WHERE IS LORENZO NEAL? Not only is he not a nominee, but he’s only been nominated once since he’s been eligible, which was the Class of 2014. That happened last year.

Photo by Robert B. Stanton/NFLPhotoLibrary

Here are his credentials:

Arguably the best pure blocking back ever (my choice, for sure)

Passed the eye test as a monster fullback

16 seasons at a brutal position

239 games, with 14 seasons of 16+ games, including his last at age 38

4x Pro Bowl, 1x All Pro

Played in 6 postseasons including one Super Bowl

Starter at fullback in front of x 1,000-yard rushers: Eddie George (‘99, ‘00 Titans), Corey Dillons (‘01, ‘02 Bengals), LaDainian Tomlinson (‘03-’07, Chargers)

Lead blocker for MVP and first-ballot Hall of Famer Tomlinson

Lorenzo Neal belongs in the Hall. So do Moose and Larry Centers. And by the way, if fullbacks were given the HOF consideration of wide receivers, the following guys would be in play along with Neal, Moose, Centers and Rathman:

And that leaves off a ton of guys who had great careers, paved the way for 1,000-yard rushers and helped their teams reach or win Super Bowls, including my guy Jason McKie plus Howard Griffith, William Henderson and Brad Hoover, to name a few.

Hall of Fame Class of 2019: Sterling Sharpe

Top 25: Torry Holt

Jack sez: As I explained here, Sterling Sharpe needs to be in the HOF yesterday. This is his final year of eligibility before heading to the senior committee, and I 100% want to see him in now. He earned it and then some, and is one of the five guys in my Class of 2019. (We’ll get to the other four as we go along.)

In 19 years of eligibility, Sharpe has never even been a semifinalist. Torry Holt has been one in each of his four seasons of eligibility. And with good reason. He was electric. In an era with Moss, Harrison and T.O., and on an offense with Kurt Warner, Marshall Faulk and Isaac Bruce, Holt managed to distinguish himself as one of the very best at his position.

I’m not sure at what point I would vote him in — not this year, and not ahead of Calvin Johnson, who will be eligible in the Class of 2021, should Holt remain on the ballot that long. But I do know that I would have put him in ahead of recent HOFers Andre Reed and Tim Brown. And I know that the gap between Holt and the other nominated WRs is too great to move anyone else into the top 40.

Having said that, where are Herman Moore and Jimmy Smith? Those two guys need to be on the ballot too.

Photo by Robert B. Stanton/NFLPhotoLibrary

Hall of Fame Class of 2019: Tony Gonzalez

Jack sez: Tony Gonzalez is the number one guy on my list for the Class of 2019, the only one about whom I had not one millisecond of debate. He is arguably the greatest tight end ever in four respects: skillset, statistics, accolade, legacy.

Quite simply, he changed the position forever, not just in terms of the level of production a team could seek from the position but also the build a player could have at the position.

He changed the prototype, bringing the super-athletic basketball body to tight end. He is the predecessor of future HOFers Antonio Gates and Rob Gronkowski, and he’s better than both. The other three tight ends who are nominated had marvelous careers and were all talented players in their own right: Mark Bavaro, Brent Jones, Jay Novacek.

But none is good enough to warrant a top 40 in a year when Tony Gonzalez is going in first ballot. It’s not worth including them when there are other guys I want to debate, and when Gonzalez is so far ahead of the rest.

Two other guys are though, and they’re not on the list.

Ben Coates and Keith Jackson.

WHERE ARE BEN COATES AND KEITH JACKSON?

Of the five guys, Coates and Jackson rank 1st and 2nd, respectively, in receptions, receiving yards and touchdowns. Coates had 50 TDs, Jackson 49, and then Bavaro was 3rd at 39.

Coates, Jackson and Novacek are on top of the pack with 5 Pro Bowls, and Jackson leads the All Pro 1st team selections with three, followed by Coates with two.

Next year.

Top 15: Tony Boselli

Top 25: Mike Kenn, Richmond Webb

Jack sez: The group of nominated offensive tackles is imposing. There are seven nominees; joining Boselli, Kenn and Webb are Willie Anderson, Lomas Brown, Chris Hinton and Chris Samuels. Anderson has the fewest Pro Bowls, and he has four. Samuels is the only one without a first-team All-Pro selection and he was a Pro Bowler in six of his 10 seasons. This is a fantastic group.

At the top is the trio of Boselli, Kenn and Webb. I struggled with where these guys should go. Boselli had the best peak but the shortest career due to injuries. He’s on the Terrell Davis / Sterling Sharpe track. Webb was probably the best tackle of his time year in and year out. Between 1990 and 1999, if I had to pick one active tackle and I was assigned one of their seasons in that time frame at random and I had to start that player from that season in the Super Bowl, Webb would be the guy I would feel best about picking.

And then there’s Mike Kenn, a steady-as-she-comes tackle, 17 years, all with the Falcons, with peaks that included his being regarded as the best in the league. His most famous season was 1991, at age 35, when he was first-team All Pro for the first time since 1980.

Here’s what Kenn did against some of the league’s best pass-rushers:

Pat Swilling, Saints: ‘91 DPOY, ‘91 AP1, ‘91 PB, 17.0 sacks in ‘91, 0 vs. Kenn

Derrick Thomas, Chiefs: HOF, ‘91 AP1, ‘91 PB, 13.0 sacks in ‘91, 0 vs. Kenn

Leslie O’Neal, Chargers: 6x PB, 9 sacks in ‘91, 0 vs. Kenn

Chris Doleman, Vikings: HOF, 7 sacks in ‘91, 0 vs. Kenn

Charles Haley, 49ers: HOF, ‘91 PB, 7 sacks in ‘91, 0 vs. Kenn

Look again at that Swilling line. He was Defensive Player of the Year with a league-leading 17 sacks, and the key here is that Kenn played Swilling three times: twice in the regular season and once in the playoffs, a Wild Card game that the Falcons won.

Now read this list of accolades from his peers.

This is Kenn’s final year of eligibility before he moves into the senior category. From what I’ve read and watched, he seems like someone who was considered a Hall of Fame-talent in his time but fell through the cracks. I would like to see one final discussion on Kenn before he moves on.

Photo by Rick Stewart/Getty Images

Top 10: Alan Faneca

Top 15: Steve Hutchinson

Top 40: Steve Wisniewski

Jack sez: Only three guards are nominated this year, and they are a stronger trio than the three top tackles. Faneca was in the top 15 his first two years of eligibility and moved into the top 10 last year. If not for needing to do some makeup work with my HOF votes with Sharpe and two others, I would be voting Faneca in this year.

Hutchinson was also top 10 last year in his first year of eligibility. He needs to be the next guard in. And Wisniewski’s eight Pro Bowl selections is the most of the 15 nominated offensive linemen.

Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

Top 10: Kevin Mawae

Top 25: Olin Kreutz

Top 40: Kent Hull, Tom Nalen

Jack sez: Kevin Mawae was the best center of his time, and will be the next center in the Hall. Because I see a large enough gap between him and the rest of the pack, I’m putting him into the top 10 and leaving the next man, our guy Olin, at the top 25.

After that, the choice between Hull, Kreutz and Nalen is super tough. (Ray Donaldson is just on the outside of that group, another guy with a wonderful career.) None of these three guys has ever advanced to the semifinals, a sign of the disrespect toward pure centers.

The last one voted in as a modern-era nominee was Dermontti Dawson in 2012. Bruce Matthews went in 2007, though he spent more of his career at guard than center. Dwight Stephenson entered in 1998, Mike Webster in 1997, and that’s the entire list of HOF centers inducted since Jim Langer in 1987, which is the last time a center went in on the first ballot.

I am obviously biased here in my choice of Kreutz over Hull and Nalen, not just because I am a Bears fan and have come to know Olin personally, but from just a pragmatic level I watched nearly every game of his career and know his candidacy better than the other two guys. I think the Hull-Kreutz-Nalen debate is a great one, and though I will stick with Olin, whoever you choose of that three should be in the top 25.

Photo by Brian Bahr/Getty Images

Top 25: Simeon Rice

Jack sez: Ooooooh Simeon Rice. Man. On a personal level, he might have been my toughest cut after the top 25. He’s in a tough spot because with the exception of transcendent players — of his era, really just Reggie White and Bruce Smith — the defensive end position tends to get boiled down to just sacks.

Rice had a lot — 122.0 — but that’s still only good for 20th all-time. He was also only selected to three Pro Bowls and was only first-team All Pro once, in 2002, with three 2nd team selections.

But let’s talk about that one year.

In 2002, Simeon Rice had one of the most dominant seasons I’ve ever watched for a defensive end. His Buccaneers won the Super Bowl that year behind its defense, and Rice was one of three Bucs named to the All Pro 1st team. The other two are in the HOF: Warren Sapp and Derrick Brooks.

Rice finished 2nd in sacks that year to DPOY Jason Taylor, with 15.5 to Taylor’s 18.5, and then ripped off a spectacular postseason: four sacks in three games, one forced fumble in each game and two fumbles recovered. His two sacks in Super Bowl XXXVII led the Bucs, and his pass rush helped force Raiders QB Rich Gannon into his first interception to eventual MVP Dexter Jackson. Jackson’s second interception came when Rice dropped into coverage, and Gannon’s first read was to the left, toward Rice, causing him to look back to the right where he threw the pick.

Rice later forced Gannon into Warren Sapp’s one sack. And when the game was nearly over, announcer John Madden said that he voted for Rice for MVP.

Photo by Al Messerschmidt/Getty Images

Top 25: Richard Seymour

Jack sez: Again, like with “Running Backs” and “Offensive Linemen,” “Defensive Linemen” is one category, but I’m splitting it up to reflect how we actually think of players. The Patriots won three Super Bowls in four years led by their defense, and Seymour — who the team drafted #6 in 2001 — was the their best defensive player.

He was versatile, beginning his career as a 4-3 d-tackle and then moving to a 3-4 d-end. He was great from the jump, earning a starting job during his rookie year and starting in New England’s stunning Super Bowl victory over the Rams. He made 7 Pro Bowls and was 1st team All Pro three times. He was strong and fast, got to the quarterback, could stuff the run and was a great leader.

Top 25: Karl Mecklenburg

Top 40: London Fletcher, Sam Mills, Zach Thomas

Jack sez: Fourteen linebackers are nominated this year, all in one category, and once again I’m separating inside from outside backers. It’s a valuable distinction for nearly everyone on the list, with one notable exception: Karl Mecklenburg.

As Rick Gosselin broke down two years ago, Mecklenburg was predominantly a 3-4 inside linebacker, but played outside as well, along with positions along the line. As a result, he is not remembered for a single position, nor did he accumulate a ton of any one stat.

“My position is strange because I played all seven front positions,” Mecklenburg told Gosselin. “One of the challenges I face in having an opportunity of going to the Hall of Fame is that, statistically, people don’t know what to do with me.”

A newspaper feature on Mecklenburg prior to Super Bowl XXI, with the headline “Denver’s Mecklenburg fools computer,” opened thusly:

“At one time, Karl Mecklenburg was a football player without a position. Now ... he has a bunch of them.”

The author went on to say that Mecklenburg “lines up everywhere but in the defensive backfield.”

Like Kenn, Mecklenburg is in his 20th and final year of eligibility. He was a defensive standout on three Super Bowl teams, made six Pro Bowls and was All Pro 1st team three times. I’m curious to hear more discussion on him.

The guy getting the biggest shaft here is Zach Thomas, with London Fletcher and Sam Mills just a bit behind. I think fans of these three players probably feel about them the way I feel about Kreutz, Peanut Tillman and Lance Briggs. Strong cases exist for them, but just-as-strong cases exist for others too. I know in particular that Dolphins fans think Thomas was just as good as Urlacher, and many see Lak’s first ballot selection as an affront to Thomas’s candidacy.

Fletcher, Mills and Thomas put up stats that in many ways rival Urlacher’s. To me, Brian just had that extra umph, in large part because of his speed. Look at these rankings of the four players:

Recovered fumbles: Mills, 23 (Urlacher 2nd, 15)

Fumble return yards: Urlacher, 177 (Mills 2nd, 154)

Interceptions: Fletcher, 23 (Urlacher 2nd, 22)

Interception return yards: Urlacher 324 (Thomas 2nd, 170)

Yards per takeaway: Urlacher, 13.5 (Mills 2nd, 8.0)

Sacks: Urlacher, 41.0 (Fletcher, 39.0, in 74 more games)

Touchdowns: Mills, Urlacher and Thomas all with four

In other words, despite not being first in the group in either takeaway category, Urlacher was dominant in takeaway yards, gaining five more per play than the next best man, Sam Mills. Statistically, that is a great indicator for where you see Urlacher’s difference — in other words, that is his eye test translated into a stat.

Add that to Urlacher’s DPOY and while I understand why fans of Fletcher, Mills and Thomas feel like their guy is getting shorted, to me this was a no-brainer.

But okay, let’s put Mecklenburg into the group.

Recovered fumbles: 3rd, with 14

Fumble return yards: 3rd, with 47

Interceptions: last, with 5

Interception return yards: 4th, with 128

Yards per takeaway: 2nd, with 9.2

Sacks: 1st, with 79.0

Touchdowns: last, with two

Suddenly, Mecklenburg’s candidacy looks pretty good. I was just a tad too young to really know his game. He strikes me as a true eye test guy. I want to hear from the voters who watched him before he’s eliminated.

Top 25: Wilber Marshall

Top 40: Leslie O’Neal

Jack sez: I wrote a ton about the inside backers, so I’m going to keep this one quick.

Wilber’s another guy like Simeon Rice. He only made three Pro Bowls and was 1st team All Pro only twice, but he made significant contributions to two Super Bowl champions known for their defense. He was a starter on the Super Bowl Shufflin’ ‘85 Bears, making him a standout on arguably the greatest defense the league has ever seen.

And then he went to Washington and was a starter for another champ, becoming a guy who Washington defensive coordinator (and fellow Class of 2019 HOF nominee) Richie Petitbon called “our best football player” the week leading up to Super Bowl XXVI.

Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images

Top 10: Champ Bailey

Top 40: Ty Law

Jack sez: Champ Bailey is probably going to be voted into the HOF this year, and he totally deserves the first ballot treatment. The only reason I’m leaving him off is that my ballot is sending in some guys who I think should have been in a while ago, and as a result I only have two first ballot spots.

One is for Gonzalez.

The other came down to Bailey and fellow DB Ed Reed, who I think did more at safety than Bailey did at corner. So I’m taking Reed, and next year I’m voting for Bailey.

But that’s just me. Bailey is almost definitely going to be voted in this year, and I’ll be applauding for sure when it happens.

Photo by Harry How/Getty Images

Hall of Fame Class of 2019: Ed Reed

Top 15: Steve Atwater

Top 25: LeRoy Butler, Darren Woodson

Jack sez: If we separate the “Defensive Backs” category into corners and safeties, then safety is probably the strongest position group of the entire ballot. I’ve got Ed Reed going in on the first ballot, joining Brian Dawkins, Ken Houston and Larry Wilson as the only pure safeties selected in their first year of eligibility. (Rod Woodson and Ronnie Lott were too, but also played extensively at corner.)

I think Steve Atwater needs to go in, while LeRoy Butler and Darren Woodson would be the tops of almost any other class.

And because we have four safeties in our top 25, I left out 2018 finalist John Lynch and two-time Super Bowl champion Rodney Harrison. Reed, Atwater, Butler, Woodson, Lynch, Harrison. That is a murderer’s row, and though I suspect Lynch will again be voted higher than Butler and Woodson, I’m rolling with the list that makes sense to me based not just on stats but my experience watching all of these guys.

Hall of Fame Class of 2019: Brian Mitchell

Top 40: Eric Metcalf

Jack sez: In 2016, I argued that while Devin Hester needs to go into the HOF, electing him and only him on the basis of him being the GOAT at his position is NFL tokenism. I selected a group of five guys who I called the inaugural class of HOF returners, and along with Hester was 2019 nominee Brian Mitchell.

I’m sure there are plenty of people who will be surprised that I’m voting for Mitchell in a year with Bailey, Faneca and others. Mitchell deserves it though, for this stat alone:

All-purpose yards, career

Jerry Rice, 23,546

Brian Mitchell, 23,330

Walter Payton, 21,803

Emmitt Smith, 21,564

Tim Brown, 19,682

That’s right: Brian Mitchell, he of a mere one Pro Bowl selection (though he was also 1st team All Pro that year, 1995), is 2nd all-time in all-purpose yards, behind only Jerry Rice.

Here’s another list:

Combined kick and punt return yards, career

Brian Mitchell, 19,013

Allen Rossum, 15,003

Josh Cribbs, 13,488

Mel Gray, 13,003

Glyn Milburn, 12,772

I don’t know how far down those lists we should extend the HOF qualification — Darren Sproles is 6th in all-purpose yards, and Allen Rossum is 2nd in return yards, and I don’t think I would vote for either as a HOFer (though Sproles is closer). But I think when you’re #2 in yardage and #1 in return yardage, you deserve that honor.

Top 10: Steve Tasker

Jack sez: The special teams slot in the Pro Bowl typically bounces around. If you go in consecutive years, you’re a stud. Steve Tasker was elected six years in a row, and bagged another three years prior to the start of his streak. He is widely called the greatest special teams coverage man of all time.

Any time the word “greatest” is in your title, you need to be there.

Top 40: none

Jack sez: We have two nominees: Jason Elam and Nick Lowery. They were both wonderful players, and I give Elam the edge, but I don’t feel strongly enough about either to move them along, let alone into the Hall.

The guy who is not nominated who should be, and who would be in my top 25, is Gary Anderson. I’ve said it before (kind of) and I’ll say it again: WHERE IS GARY ANDERSON? He was the first man to break George Blanda’s all-time scoring record, a mark he held from 2000 until the end of 2006, when Class of 2017 HOFer Morten Andersen passed him.

Anderson is still third in points, third in field goals and second in games played. He belongs in this discussion.

Top 40: Sean Landeta

Jack sez: In a 21-year career, Landeta won two Super Bowls, reached two Pro Bowls and was first-team All Pro three — yep, three — times. That’s excellent for a punter. I was very close to nudging him into the top 25 but I couldn’t decide who I would remove.

Landeta was also named to the NFL’s All-Decade team for the 1990s as the 1st team punter, and was 2nd team for the 2000s. That’s an element we haven’t discussed yet in this story, and is a valuable barometer for HOF odds, because the HOF selection committee votes for it. (Its flaw as a barometer is that players whose prime straddles decades get left off.)

I would like to hear more arguments for Landeta from the people who watched him. I’ve got him ahead of Jeff Feagles, this year’s other nominee.

Two other guys I would like to see considered were known for their powerful legs and were both game-changers (in the game) and Game-changers (at the position): the late Reggie Roby, best known for his time with the Dolphins, and Darren Bennett, best known for his time with the Chargers. These were the punters who really put me in awe of punting and made me sit up and take notice whenever they were on the field. They had what Isiah Thomas once called “the oohs and the ahs.”

That’s important at any position, but especially at punter, which so often goes unnoticed unless a mistake is made or unless they rack up a ton of years.

Top 40: none, as there are no nominees

Should a long snapper be considered for the Hall? I posed that question last year to none other than our own Pat Mannelly, who certainly goes down in history as one of the greatest to ever do it. Here’s what he said:

I don’t think so. If you were going to go off positions, I would say yes, but to me, the long snapper didn’t become truly a football position until the year 2000. I wrote on my blog a thank you to all the guys who came before me, because they helped the long snapping position become what it is. All the guys before me, they played other positions. There are now 32 long snappers. There weren’t always 32 long snappers. ... All these guys were backups at their positions. They weren’t truly just long snappers. The game has changed in that regard.

Mannelly did note, however, that long snapper should be a position in the Pro Bowl. I agree completely. Here is his argument for that:

They vote for a fullback. How many teams have a fullback? There are 32 long snappers now. There are not 32 fullbacks. So why not make it a voted-on position? People say, “Well, we don’t know how to vote for it.” Well do people really know how to vote for a guard? Does your average fan know what the best guard is? It’s from what they read in the media. And then players and coaches vote as well, so I don’t understand why they don’t have that.

I agree with that too. And while I understand what Pat is saying about long snapper only being a separate position since the year 2000, that means we’ve nearly had two decades of long snappers as their own position. It’s probably time we undertake this discussion in earnest. I’m in favor of it. Certainly Mannelly is one who should be considered in that respect. I would be curious to hear more from him on who he thinks the greatest long snappers are since 2000.

Hall of Fame Class of 2019: Clark Shaughnessy

Top 40: Don Coryell

Jack sez: At last, we get to Shaughnessy.

The innovator extraordinaire and one of the fathers of the modern offense was a finalist three times in the 1970s, but has been largely forgotten since then. There was a time when he seemed like a sure-thing to make the Hall. In 1975, five years after his death at age 78, George Puscas of the Detroit Free Press called Shaughnessy “the most inventive genius of modern football,” adding that “For sure, one of these years, Clark Shaughnessy will make it.”

He still hasn’t.

The main problem with Shaughnessy’s candidacy is that to me, he’s in the wrong category. First of all, coaches don’t advance to the seniors committee, as far as I can tell, so we end up with a guy like Shaughnessy as a “modern-era nominee” 126 years after his birth, 56 years after his final NFL job and 48 years after his death.

Second, some coaches weren’t necessarily Hall of Fame coaches, but as the years go on we see that their contributions to the game have exceeded their coaching career. That’s true for Shaughnessy, and then some. His actual NFL career looks like this:

1944-1947: Washington, as an advisor

1948-1948: Los Angeles Rams, head coach

1951-1962: Chicago Bears, defensive coordinator

If that was his entire NFL career, I doubt we’re still talking about him lo these many years later. The reason we are is because what he did in the 1940s to revive, invigorate and spread the old T-formation, the game’s oldest formation.

While working as head football coach of University of Chicago he became friends with George Halas, and after a wildly successful season as head coach at Stanford, he spent time with Halas and Bears assistant Ralph Jones, all of whom were tinkering with updating the T.

Shaughnessy and Jones helped install the new T — known for its man in motion, spread formations, multiple play options and general trickery — with the Bears, leading to the team’s famous deconstruction of Washington 73-0 in the 1940 NFL championship game.

The degree to which Shaughnessy deserves credit for the T vs. Jones or Halas is a matter of debate. In 1941, when Jones became head coach at Lake Forest College, columnist Henry McLemore of the United Press called Jones the “real master” of the T-formation and credited him with the man in motion innovation.

What is not up for debate is the respect Shaughnessy’s peers had for him, and the influence he had on the game. Sid Luckman credits Shaughnessy with teaching him the T. After Shaughnessy’s death in 1970, Halas called Shaughnessy “one of the great inventive minds of the game” and “a master strategist.”

In his new book, “The Genius of Desparation,” Doug Farrar quotes Halas on Shaughnessy:

“Before we began collaborating, our T formation had two major weaknesses (...). One trouble was we only had two end runs ... thanks to Shaughnessy, we have 22 maneuvers around the ends — touchdown plays. Second, the majority of our plays went to the side of the line of the man in motion. Shaughnessy designed ground-gainers that run to the side opposite the man in motion. These counter plays were honeys.”

Added Farrar to me on Twitter: “Jones brought it forward some, but I think Shaughnessy was the more obvious innovator.”

I am still exploring the true wrinkles of history with regards to Shaughnessy and the T, but I’ll take Halas’s word on this one, and Farrar’s too.

Fellow nominee Don Coryell, whose Air Coryell offense helped usher in the modern passing attacks, is another man without a true categorical home, at least for now.

“You know, I’m sitting down there in front, and next to me is Joe Gibbs, and next to him is Dan Fouts, and the three of us are in the Hall of Fame because of Don Coryell,” said John Madden in 2010 at a memorial service for Coryell, whom he coached under at San Diego State in the 1960s. “There’s something missing.”

I’ve emailed the Pro Football Hall of Fame to ask whether there has been any discussion about separating coaches, about creating a seniors division for coaches, and about whether some coaches should be moved into the contributor category when warranted.

That’s where I would put Shaughnessy. It’s where I would put Don Coryell, too. But they’re in this category, and as long as they are, I’ll vote for them until they’re in.

Clark, you’re up first. Thanks for the T, good sir.

-

-

-

Jack M Silverstein is Windy City Gridiron’s Bears historian, and author of “How The GOAT Was Built: 6 Life Lessons From the 1996 Chicago Bulls.” He is the proprietor of Chicago sports history Instagram “A Shot on Ehlo.” Say hey at @readjack.

Source: https://www.windycitygridiron.com/2018/11/15/18067462/historian-jack-m-silverstein-class-of-2019-pro-football-hall-of-fame-ballot-clark-shaughnessy

[beauty-and-passion]

What Eurovision 2021 taught us

1. That a nice, enjoyable show was possible (even if 4 presenters are still too much)

Of course nothing can beat Love Love Peace Peace (even if Ja Ja Ding Dong does its best), but this year's intermissions were very enjoyable.

We expected something flashy and over the top because hey, The Netherlands. Sex, drugs, gays and all that jazz.

But instead Covid surprised us. And then The Netherlands surprised us even more, by making a very enjoyable show, despite the restrictions. My personal favourites were:

The water intermission of the first semi-final. I loved the mixed feelings, how water is both scary and respected, for being such a powerful, unstoppable force.

The rooftop concerts during the final. Social distancing? Sure, no problem, let's make the past winners sing on top of some roofs all over Rotterdam. That was pure genius, I loved it so much.

On the other hand, the presenters were basically all useless. We could've had just two of them instead of four. But hey, at least they weren't as cringy as the three scary ukranians from 2017 or the useless four ladies from Portugal. The true highlights of the show were the intermissions, the guests and especially the songs themselves and this is perfectly good for me.

________________________

2. That we can live in a world without boring ass ballads

I’ve never been so proud of the Eurovision public, especially during the second semifinal: that evening was PACKED with ballads. Boring ballad after boring ballad, with just a couple more funny songs in between.

The ballads were all left behind. Even the two Amen. And I love the irony we chose El Diablo and the finnish band for the final, but no Amen. No saints allowed, only the norwegian angel. As it always should be.

And so we had the best final I've seen since I started following Eurovision in 2014. Catchy songs, dance songs, upbeat songs. And power ballads. Yes, ballads can still have a place, but only if they're good.

Because yes, Switzerland and France were good. Very good. Just not as good as the ones the public wanted.

________________________

3. That we want Eurovision, not Englishvision

Every year, the same message blasts from all Europeans: send a song in your native language. This show is supposed to make other people from Europe (and the rest of the world) to know more about your own country, to enjoy its rhythm and to listen to something we don't usually hear. So why waste this huge opportunity, to bring a generic song in English?

Because the English song wins. Because we all understand English, so English has more chances.

Flash news: GUESS WHO WON THIS YEAR. No, it’s not the generic English song.

The public has been crystal clear, the final poll is even clearer: the top five includes an italian song, an ukraine song, two french songs and only one english song. We want different styles and rhythms, we want to listen to Europe.

So I want to give my full thank you to:

Albania: amazing song, great voice, wonderful language. Do it again.

Serbia: these ladies are fantastic, their song is great and they sang it in their language so I love them

Switzerland: thank you for leaving English to the side to give us some good french

Spain: the song wasn't as good as Universo, but it was in sexy spanish, so thank you for using it almost every year

Danemark: the song was terrible, but it was in your language and this alone deserves everything

France: I know we all make fun of you for being France, but your language is perfect for songs, so thank you for always using it

Ukraine: take note, Ukraine, because Europe is madly in love with your language and your rhythm

Italy: our language is beautiful, so thank you for delivering every year

While my biggest biases go to:

Greece: a generic pop song with no balkan rhythm and no greek either? An absolute shame, greek should always be used for songs.

Russia: russian language is very melodious and yes, we got something this year, but what about bringing a full russian song? We want it!

Germany: I may sound crazy, but I honestly think german language is good for songs. It's not like the mediterranean languages, but it still works. So please, do not be scared and show what you can do with it!

Scandinavian countries: why do you never want to bring your own language? Do it, don't be scared! Yes, Sweden, I'm talking with you: you still never tried to bring something in swedish, so do it.

________________________

4. That we don't want Americans to play with us

For reasons we still have to understand, Flo Rida was competing this year. And he was competing for San Marino, the smallest European country.

I'm pretty sure they took some time to explain to him what was going on, where he was, where San Marino is, wtf was happening, why there were sexy italians and ukranian witches and a norwegian angel and loads of beautiful women everywhere.

And I loved how we all send memes about this, about ahahah why is Flo Rida here, what if San Marino wins where would they host Eurovision, all while enjoying an actual catchy song.

And then, in the end, Flo Rida basically disappeared. Who remembers Flo Rida, when we got Ukraine, Italy, Finland, Iceland, and the UK? And Germany being wholesome? And the love story between Norway and Azerbaijan? We collectively forgot about him and I think it's very sexy from Europe to just say "nope" and push America away, even if for just one week.

And this isn't the first time: we basically showed Madonna in a corner in 2019, thanks to Mans, Eleni, Verka and Conchita. Once again, Europeans knows what they want: we don't want Americans. Australia can because they're like that little brother we took under our wing for no reason and now it's part of us. But not Americans.

The rest of the year is all yours, but one week is ours.

________________________

5. That we can lose like bosses

This year, the voting results have been absolutely insane and FOUR COUNTRIES got zero points from the public, while the UK got both zero points from the public AND the jury.

Don't get me wrong, the song was bad. And yes, Brexit played a role in this. And yes, hating England is Europe’s favourite sport.

But can we please all take a moment and appreciate how James Newman reacted? The public gave him a round of applause and he celebrated this achievement like a boss.

And he had all the reasons! He achieved something incredible, he unlocked something that this new voting system was supposed to never lead to. But he did it. So hats off to you, my boy: My Last Breath was better.

Germany is also used to the bottom of the chart, but this year I really thought Jendrik could have a chance to achieve a higher position. The song was funny, carefree, lively, the hand costume was the kind of trash we need and the message was nice as well. But he still got 3 points.

Despite that, Jendrik celebrated like a maniac and seeing his this happy made me happy as well. I really wish him the best.

________________________

6. That FUCK YOU JURY

Again, same message every year: the jury vote should be eliminated. It's a fucking farce and their votes have nothing to do with what the public want.

The jury focuses on the voices, except when they don't, and clearly giving points to your neighbours is because you like the song, not because they're your neighbours.

I usually make fun of Greece and Cyprus showing eternal love to each other, by giving 12 points to each other every year, but this time, it sounded even more stupid than usual. It really looked like a farce. Why should we see this farce? Why can't we just choose what the public wants? So at least we would blame ourselves for our shitty musical tastes.

Even if I'm pretty sure we all have great musical tastes. Let's not forget that in 2019 the public's winner was Norway, with a song that mixed english, a catchy rhythm and an amazing part in yoik language. Arcade is good as well, but we cannot deny the norwegian entry was a lot more interesting.

And this year, the public's taste was flawless:

Look at this beauty: italian glam rock, ukranian techno folk, french powerful ballad, finnish hard rock and whatever that thing was with Iceland.

There's variety, there's everything for everyone. And there are native languages. Italian, Ukranian, and French on top three, followed by English.

Moral of the story: the public is great and the jury should be abolished forever.

________________________

7. That Ukranian technofolk is all we needed in our lives

I didn’t see enough love for Go_A, so as italian, I think it's my sworn duty to give my appreciation to them and their amazing entry, because this band is awesome and Shum is currently on top of the Spotify top 50 - as it should be, because everyone should listen to it and join this slavic rave party.

I already liked their entry for 2020, Solovey. But I also liked My Last Breath from the UK and Universo from Spain. And this year they brought two of the worst songs. So I was very wary of Go_A.

But Shum is an absolute blast. Katerina Pavlenko's voice is unique and the song is even more, because based on ukranian folklore and traditional dances to summon the spirit of spring. They managed to teach something to all Europe in a three minute song and I think that’s incredibly sexy of them.

And so, I searched for other songs and OMG, I don’t know how it’s possible, but they are all great. Rano-Ranenko, Zhalmenina, Tanula, they all are perfect and I’m in love with this band.

And if all of this is not enough, THEY DID A COVER OF DANCING LASHA TUMBAI. The most iconic Eurovision song, sang by our god Verka. And this is the coolest, most badass cover ever in the whole universe. Please listen to it HERE everyone needs to hear this.

So thank you, Ukraine, for giving us Go_A. We all had a small empty place in our hearts and this place has ben perfectly filled by them.

And yif you think you don’t need ukranian technofolk, is only because you still haven’t listened to it. Please listen and enjoy Shum. You’re welcome.

________________________

8. That rock and roll never dies (and Italy’s well deserved victory)

The last time Italy won was in 19-fucking-90. 31 years ago. I was just born.

And now, they finally won again. And what a song! Despite being italian, I've never listened to Maneskin before, but oh damn, this song is good. Not all their songs are, but this one is. And also Morirò da re.

Their show was perfect as well. This post is really eye-opening about how well they put on their show. The use of the stage, the movements, everything has been part of a great performance, even their clothes. Damiano's voice never faltered, despite having an entire continent watching him. They handled the stage like bosses, despite being only in their twenties. And they gave us some good fucking rock.

And so the public said a loud "FUCK YOU" to the jury and chose its winners. The sassy, sexy italians.

And yes, I know that there has been a lot of petty polemics because those youngsters are having drugs!1!! as if they were a bunch of idiots who used drugs on international TV, with their manager sitting next to them.

Of course it was a pointless accusation and honestly I don't care if some people are sore losers. The drug results were negative anyway, what a shocker.

What we should truly think about is how strong the Maneskin's bladders are, because they spent the whole evening of the final drinking the entire alcohol supply of the Eurovision and, at the end, they were still happy and cool. Hats off to you, you sexy people.

This man is just iconic, why did I miss him before.

Also, have some more Maneskin. You know, as a treat.

________________________

9. That solidarity and wholesomeness are the biggest winners

It's just beautiful to see these nice people, from all over Europe, bonding, having fun, taking photos together and being friends.

The true winner of this, is probably Norway: Tix wanted to have a good time and he had a good time. The video of him vibing with Ukraine and Germany while listening Hard Rock Hallelujah is the best (HERE). His love story with Efendi from Azerbaijan is even better (please, check the video on his youtube channel, it's hilarious). I don't like his song, but he's a great guy and deserves everything.

The italian and finnish rock relationship is also great. Maneskin and Dark Sides found each other, considering they were the only two rock bands in the competition, so mutual appreciation was inevitable.

But Damiano is also a man of culture and he appreciates Ukraine's entry. And Ukraine appreciates both Finland and Italy. Is this what world peace looks like? Because I love it.

________________________

10. That Italians will be Europe's clowns again (and you're all allowed to make fun of us)

Beware, Europe: we Italians are messy and chaotic, our presenters don’t know a single word in English, we are homoerotic AND homophobic at the same time, our musical competitions are so fucking sloooow... let’s say next year’s Eurovision is going to be interesting.

And yes, you’re allowed to make fun of us. We don’t care, we won, so we deserve to be Europe’s clowns once again.

And I don’t know who the presenters will be (my bets are on everyone’s favourites: Fiorello, Amadeus and Malgioglio), I don’t know how we will ridicule ourselves once again, I don’t know where will we find the money to put on the show, I don’t know how ungodly long it will be... but I know that Mans Zelmerlow will be part of it. This man loves Eurovision just like all of us, so I can already see him packing his suitcase and planning his flight to Italy. Come to us, Mans, we will wait for you. We actually need an English presenter, so if you have nothing else to do...

[lostinyourears]

THE G1 HYPE TRAIN #3 :  G1 Climax 2012′s Semi-Final and Finals

Card with Guide

This will be the most modern one I’ve taken on thus far, but might not be the most modern as I might cover last year's final. I figured this would be a good one to cover for a few reasons. Like Okada being the current IWGP title holder and in this years G1 as well. It’s also the first time in 20 years a gaijin made it to the finals. The last foreigner to make it this far was Rick Rude back in 1992. 

Kazuchika Okada vs. Togi Makabe, 2012′s G1 Semifinal

Who’s who?

Okada is the young gun wearing gold and pink shorts and gold boots. He was recently champion, but lost it 2 months earlier to the Ace of NJPW Hiroshi Tanahashi ending Okada’s 1st reign and starting Tanahashi’s 6th. Okada wants to win here and get a shot at WK to beat Tanahashi for the belt. Though that’s a large task as this is Kazuchika Okada’s first ever G1 Climax. 

Another interesting fact for this match/event is that Okada just joined the ‘CHAOS’ faction earlier in this same year after winning his comeback match over Yoshi-Hashi at WK. The day after WKVI at a press conference where a title match was made between him and Tanahashi it was also revealed that Okada was the newest member of Chaos.

Togi Makabe is the older more brutish talent of the two wearing black. He too has had only one reign with the IWGP Title back in 2010. He had also won G1 before in 2009 and will be looking to become one of the few talents to ever win more than once. 

How’s the match?

Good, I’m glad it’s so hard hitting because it’s early in the night and it would have felt unfair if this match was an easy win and the winner took on whoever wins the next match in the finals right after the other talent fought in the semi-finals. Togi Makabe tosses Okada around like the pup he was at the time. Then the Rainmaker pulled an ace out of his sleeve and barely got by the gorilla of a man Tobi Makabe.

Karl Anderson vs Hiroshi Tanahashi, 2012′s G1 Semi-Finals

Who’s who?

Karl Anderson is the white bald gaijin with a beard. He is wearing blue tights and knee pads. Karl Anderson at this point was a well worn tag team member having won World Tag League in 2009, voted WoN’s best tag team of 2011 Bad Intentions(w/ Giant Bernard), Together that team had captured both the IWGP and GHC tag straps that NOAH uses. Still Karl Anderson hadn’t held any singles gold of note. This G1 was his chance to grasp the brass ring and prove his singles value.

His first challenge of the night was Hiroshi Tanahashi, who is wearing long white pants. At the time he was holding the IWGP Championship after winning it from Okada at Dominion 6.16.2012 Tanahashi being very well established as championship talent at this point, this being his 6th reign while Okada had only been champion once. Tanahashi could beat everyone and prove that he is the ace by not only being champion, but also winning G1 ontop of that. 

How’s the match?

Good, as always Hiroshi Tanahashi’s High Fly Flow crossbody seems like it’s heat seeking. Flying outside and creaming Anderson in a very epic moment in this semifinal fight. While Karl Anderson got the upperhand by being the smarter worker. Him targeting the leg of Tanahashi and countering at the right time late in the fight netted him the win. It was a huge moment and marked Anderson being the first Gaijin to get to the finals of the G1 since Rick Rude as noted earlier.  

Karl Anderson vs Kazuchika Okada, 2012′s G1 Finals

Who’s who?

Covered them both above, but to reiterate Karl Anderson is the bald white guy who is a noted tag team technician at this time but hadn’t won a G1 or singles title in NJPW.

While Okada is in gold shorts and boots and is the young Chaos stable upstart who had 2 months earlier dropped the IWGP belt to Hiroshi Tanahashi. Eager to get the win and prove himself as a past and future champion and earn another shot at the biggest belt in Japan. 

How’s the match?

Great, the two men have plenty of chemistry and mesh very well in this finals match. It might not stack up to recent Okada bouts, but with some call those the best matches ever that’s nothing to be ashamed of. I’d probably suggest this match as a standalone viewing as I think watching the 2 earlier rounds will have some people annoyed at overlap of spots. Not that they are bad spots, but Okada putting heads in the ring barrier and Karl Anderson’s headscissor---->armdrag--->headscissors---->armdrag--->headscissors----> happens in both his matches. It’s nothing major, but it does seem weird to use both those spots over. A really interesting note is that this was Kazuchika Okada’s first G1 and he won it, Kenny Omega would be the next man to do that. Will 2017 have a similar fresh faced winner?

I think this was a great breakout performance by Karl Anderson and Kazuchika Okada. This moment is crowning the youngest person to win the G1 Climax and it’s easy to tell even 5 years ago that NJPW saw a huge future in this guy. It feels very reminiscent of Randy Orton or Brock Lesnar’s youngest guy to win the big one moment. After the match we get Gedo and Okada in the ring and Okada post match presser. All three matches are really fun and 3/4th of the men involved will be in this years G1. Will Okada or Tanahashi join the 3 time club, or will Togi Makabe join them with 2 wins? Or will another first timer win like Okada did 5 years ago? Only time will tell as the G1 starts on the 17th, stay tuned here for coverage of that as it happens. 

[borisbubbles]

20. SAN MARINO

Senhit - “Freaky!”

Before we start, SORRY for not updating sooner. PED hit me sooner *and* harder than I anticipated and one of my tooth fillings dropped, so I’m currently on painkillers. Also the EBU’s online ‘replacement show’ for the first semifinal... :shudders: 

However, allow me to bring some happiness into my life (and by proxy, yours), by discussing the one, the only, the true 2020 Queen of EuroTRASH....

...

...

... Samanta Tina, in a few updates. 🤭

Until then, let’s dish on Senhit.

Entry Analysis. 

Hang on. Senhit you say? THIS SENHIT?

Yes, I am FOREMOST cuckoo-completely for the fact that SRMTV dug up this haggard frump from her crypt and forced her to do Eurovision simply because they had no other options <3 (and also because they had an Azerbaijani hand-me-down more on that in NF Corner). I always liked Senile Drunk Auntie Senit more than probably should (yes, “Stand by” is boring but 2011 is a dungheap, LET ME HAVE MY RANDOM FAVES OKAY)

Second of all, the accompanying transformation of Senit into SenHIT. We went from this:

to this?

LIFE IS GOOD WHEN YOU’RE IN A FREAKING(!) MIDLIFE CRISIS. 

Holy shit, what a transformation into... idek what to describe FREAKY!’s video clip as? A neo-neon-nightmare, featuring aggressively sexual grinding by Senhit, inflicted upon half-naked men in a setting that borrow heavily from Hatari’s BDSM couture? It’s fucking BONKERS. 

 May I also remind you that Senhit is EVEN OLDER THAN *BICENTANNIAL WOMAN TAMTARATAM* and despite this she manages to sell her sexual aggression as a something *FUNNY* without making herself look like a desperate tart? HER POWER. 😍

I also have to mention the fucking MARKETING campaign that accompanied this mad, menopausal circus of bad taste. You diehards probably noticed the San Marino 2021 mugs (those HIDEOUS teal/pink/sand coloured mugs <3) like I did and like me probably thought it was an elaborate hoax? Turn out... it somehow *wasn’t* a hoax and you could order them on Senhit’s personal website??? WHAT??? Btw, forget about the mugs, how about PERSONALIZED CONDOMS?

SOLD OUT lmfao <3 Bet most Senhit fans never actually used a condom before <3

All of this hogwash for a song that can best be described as an irrideemable pile of disco dreck. 😍  God I was SO on board with UNIRONICALLY stanning San Marino for once. #YesWeSen. 

and... then Eurovision 2020 was taken away from me, you and Senhit, and my appreciation towards her quickly dried up before it could settle as unironic stanning.😬 Sigh. BUT WORRY NOT QUEEN’S GOT YOU COVERED.

<3

NF Corner

Oh my fucking god, yes, the codswallop that was “Digital Battle Eurovision”. So, after months of silence (other than Senhit nasically spoiling her participation on social media, which no one really took seriously because come on, it’s Senhit) San Marino held something that was supposed to pass as a “national final” and it’s the shoddiest thing I’ve ever seen in the 8 years I’ve been following the preshow <3 

Okay so... This is where Azerbaijan come in. You may not know this yet, but “Cleopatra” by Efendi was, at some point during development, given to San Marino. I’m not sure about the exact details, but from what I heard and assumed, Azer’s broadcaster Ichtimai decided they didn’t need “Cleopatra”, so they gave the demo to San Marino, who then recruited Senhit to sing it in. Sounds like fan fiction and fortunately for us the recordings have made they way to the yubtubs so I can prove you it is gospel. Observe:

Senhit - “Cleopatra”

YES QUEEN OF THE GAYS <3 (lol I should keep my opinions on Efendi’s Cleopatra hidden for now, but spoilers I am going to fucking RIP that crock of shit to shreds once I get there).

So anyway, at *SOME* point after giving “Cleopatra” to the San Marinese, Ichtimai must’ve decided that “nope, Cleopatra will be OUR entry, thx” and punted Senhit out of her glorious pseudo-historical trash anthem (more on that too when I rank Azerbaijan), a WEEK before the deadline, (😂🤣) which of course meant that San Marino had to *improvize*. 😅

Enter: a ramshackle SING-OFF between two songs, deadline ON THE MORNING OF THE DELEGATION MEETING. 🤣. Your choices:

SONG #1 A trashy disco song that never would have stood a prayer at Eurovision and would’ve been a disaster in every universe, especially *and* including our own, but was complete lip service towards any vocal Stan Marino.

SONG #2 The English translation of a competent, but somewhat tepid electropop song that Senhit had released in Italian in September, mere days after the 2020 season had started. Good, but nothing too exciting. 

Senhit - Obsessed

And honestly, it seemed clear that FREAKY! would win from second one? It seemed like the clear follow-up to Serhat (sorta?), a perfect fan service song to keep the balding gays busy so they don’t pick up their phones and vote for boring shit such as Gjon’s Tears. However, when FREAKY! won it was revealed it had only won by a TINY margin over Obsessed anyway. What the FUCK was this year honestly and why does NONE of it make sense. 

San Marino 2020 & San Marino 2021

I mean... yes, the second semifinal was compiled of a series of oozing trashheaps and boring smug, and yes, both demographs would provide qualifiers and no, Senhit *never* would’ve been one of them, being stuck in the first half. 

It would seem as if “FREAKY!” was a worthy successor to “Say na na na”, but I don’t think that comparison really works. The only things those two songs have in common is their camp and their singer’s inability to sing (lol have I ever said a positive thing about Serhat, ever, in print? I should counteract that by saying something kind: Serhat is very good at... um... being a dentist. 🙂)

However, “Say na na na” also had a universally positive message, even if it adhered the tried-and-true “BELIEVE IN YOURSELF IF YOU DO THIS BANALE THING” cliché.” FREAKY!” literally is a hodgepodge of acid trippy menopausal nonsense, which I personal find more endearing, but Europe would swiftly whisk towards the rubbish bin for being bad and female. C’est la vie. 

Nada on 2021 yet and given how desperate and scarce with information San Marino are, I expect no news until the literal last minute. I personally wouldn’t be too surprised if they withdrew, but eh, I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. As long as we have Samanta Demon to cover our trip-hop-trash needs, I couldn’t rly care less about San Marino. 

FREAKY! FRIDAY! FACTOR!

I mean, even if you had *any* doubts how well Senhit would score in the category I named after her, let me recap

- San Marino recruited a random-ass-returnee nobody really asked for. - They initially gave her an Azeri hand-me-down trashpop song about a Macedonian-Greek pharaoh - Azerbaijan then took BACK said hand-me-down trashpop song and made it their entry - Which forced San Marino to flimsily put together a last-minute digital NF where you could decide which of these two HOPELESS songs would facilitate their NQ - The deadline of which was set *ON THE MORNING OF THE DELEGATION MEETING IN ROTTERDAM* (aka the literal submissions deadline) - The obvious winner *almost* lost the vote everyone expected them to win (again!) - and of course: the video clip, the website, the emails, the slogans, the CONDOMS. This is honestly what FREAKY! FRIDAY! FACTORS! are made for. Happily take away the first (but not last) perfect score, queen. 

Score: 5 Senhits out of 5. 

[borisbubbles]

ESC2019 Preshow #02

02. ICELAND  Hatari - “Hatrið mun sigra” SemiFinal 1, #13

The general sentiment towards Hatari appears to be polarized and I think this is a good development: Opinions on Hatari should never come without controversy! “Hatrið mun sigra” is loud and aggressive and taking an utter piss at the contest. 😍

Even I wasn’t fully onboard for a while. Mind, I have always liked “Hatrið mun sigra”, but it was a default favourite, since Friðrik and Hera were both terrible (seriously, how does one, let alone TWO, downgrade from Iconic Europulp to boring (and in Hera’s case, thin)!!! GTFO out, NOW!!!) and it being Iceland, I had resigned myself that one of them would win. Once I saw the live performance at the finale, my Hatari love hit full throttle and there rest is herstory.

ENTRY ANALYSIS

OOOOOOBVIOUSLY I love Hatari um HELLO??? Like, industrial punk BDSM extravanganza with a *KILLER* key change 😍  by nihilistic men who wander around aimlessly in mullets and blue tracksuits 😍 whose main goal is to bring forth of the end of capitalism and plunge the world into an utter dystopia 😍

 “Hatrið mun sigra” is a SPECTACLE. The visuals, the yelling, the key change (Klemens’s voice is  E V E R Y T H I N G), the casually manhandling each other in front of thousands of people <3 Naturally, a lot of people do not like it but I mean, weakness won’t be tolerated. Capitalism and Hatred won’t be defeated by tossing flowers at them!!! 

Of course Hatari are the subject of many a misconception. “God they’re so fake, it’s a constructed persona!!” well, d’uh? What did you expect? That they spend their daily lives manhandling each other, dressed up in leather & chains or monotonously droning about how supermarkets are direct portals into hell? “They will ruin the integrity of the music contest and make everything political again” wait, WHAT??? A) of all when is Eurovision NOT fucking political, and B) of all, their *song* is the protest, you fucking moron. There is no better way of protesting than to get those you protest AGAINST to cheer for you!!! (Better than harassing people on Social Media, take note Roger Waters). 

“Hatrið mun sigra” is not spreading hatred, it is the harbinger of what will happen IF hate is spread:

HATRED WILL WIN

AS LOVE DIES,

AND JOY ENDS,

FOR THEY ARE ILLUSIONS,

 A HOPELESS PIPE DREAM

HATRED SHALL PREVAIL!!!

And I mean why not, in this post-brexit, post-trump, post-bolsonaro, post-isil dystopia of a world!! It’s a relevant message!!! Their intent is good, back up off them!!!

This is normally where I would place and NF corner, but I’m going to going to bother lmfao. Let me instead take you on the ~Entire Hatari Experience~ train, which matches (and trancends) the song in epicness. Every Hatari interview we get is a delight in its own right, so I’ll spend my bandwith on those instead. Challenging Bibi to a wrestling match, winner gets to set up a BDSM colony in the loser’s land 😍  Irritating the shit of their fellow Söngvakeppnin finalists by doing hammy shit like this

(Annoying Hera SO much she cannot resist mockingthem <3)

Or like the time they spent an entire VT matter-of-factly dismantling everything wrong with western society over an indifferent slice of cake (featuring my future ex husband (um he doesn’t know it yet (well he does *now* I guess)) Fannar Sveinsson)

Or fuck it, just this entire fucking interview lmfao

“We feel that the echoes of populism are growing ever more loudly” lmfao . Every Hatari moment is like watching a satiral sitcom unfold before our very eyes. They’re full of shit. They know it, you know it, I know it. And nobody (of relevance) gives a fuck that they are <3 It’s important to note here that Hatari have genuine respect for Eurovision though, unlike a certain someone. Hatari aren’t here to destroy Eurovision, but to enrichen it with their delightfully abrasive presence. I guess at the end of the day, Love truly is Forever And Everyone, y’all.

Qualification Odds: Guaranteed Qualifier.

The curse will finally be broken <3 I mean, it’s well deserved too, Hatari are probably the best Icelandic entrant since Yohanna (or since ‘Never Forget’if you purely count the studio versions of songs).

But first, a digression :o

Nomally, the fan community is divisible into distinct fanbases. You have:

- The Shippers who spin entire erotic fanfics about their fave contestants in the darkest dungeons of the innerwebs, 

- The Fangirls who flick their beans at any conventionally attractive male,

- The Basics who love their bangers pre-packaged and ready-made 

- The Fraus/Husbando’s for whom Eurovision is a family experience, 

- The Eurosnobs who claim to watch Eurovision for music but are secretly the most shallow of them all 

- The Casuals who tune in on Saturday night out of habit, mostly because their parents are Fraus

- The Silent Introverts, the young people who do not comment but lurk by the sidelines reading any articile they can get their hands on

- The Geriatrics, basically the older version of the introverts (usually due to technological impairment, rather than shyiness) 

- The Junkies who live and breather Eurovision and talk about it hours on end (guess which demograph I fit in) 

Bringing this up because most entries can be shoehorned into 2-4 demographs that will love it and usually one demograph which will not care about it. 

Now, back on track with the actual analysis:

Hatari aren’t like most entries because because they both appeal and turn off members of every demograph, which I think is a fantastic quality in a Eurovision song. It’s good to be polarizing, because it creates an intense following that will result in a lot of televotes (and haters are irrelevant because you cannot vote against entries you hate). 

I’ve mentioned in Duncan’s write-up that I’m not ~entirely~ feeling him as the winner and now I can reveal why: I have always had Hatari as my predicted winner, ever since they won Söngvakeppinin. Those who say they can’t are closing their eyes to the truth. Hatari follow the recent winners trend the closest of any entrant in this year: strong concept, stronger execution, colourful personalities, memorable gimmick and quickly turning in the social media darling of the season: just like every winner from Loreen onwards has. They can still get screwed out of the win by juries, but... Jamala and Netta aren’t exactly jury-friiendly entries and they were top 3 anyway? lol. Hatari *are* the natural favourite to win ESC. Mark my words, sheeple. Hatred SHALL prevail. 

Projected placement: 1st-3rd in the semifinal. When they qualify, Hatari will finish 1st-6th  CONGRATZ TO THE WINNER OF MY PRESHOW RANKING

Dropping the entry later today~

Link to the masterpost

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2017 Post-Show!

Hello everyone!

Eurovision 2017 has finally finished and what a year it was. I had my doubts it would end up a good year after that DISASTROUS first semifinal, but largely in thanks to nearly all the SHIT entries getting killed off in the semi + most qualifiers improving in the finale, it still made for an enjoyable year.

Strengths: + Strong theme & good aesthetics all-around + Well-produced, despite taking place in a poor, war-ridden country + One of the best stages in recent memory (the only one I liked better was 2014′s) + AMAZING, flawless VTs + Strong line-up in the finale, overall righteous qualification decisions + Satisfying results: the top 4 consists of 3 countries which never won before + Belgium, who won ONCE. + The new voting system makes the tally exciting, even in the case of a blowout winner such as Salvador. + Some of the best interval acts in Eurovision. (not featuring Petra Mede of course) + VERKAVISION

Weaknesses: - Volodymyr & Oleksander were fairly insipid finale hosts (still better than the three Austrian bimbettes though) - Questionable jury voting (we can defo thank the new system for exposing their UNREASONABLE biases for certain countries.) - While the bad songs largely stayed in the semifinal, some really good ones did as well. - Semifinal 1 is the single WORST Eurovision live show since 2012. - The overal selection of songs was weaker than in 2016. - The entire Russia vs Ukraine debacle seeped into this year’s contest and it was UGLY. - Poor, ineffective staging for a LOT of entries brought the enjoyment factor down a bit But yeah overall, I think this was a pretty good year? It’s no 13/14/16, but definitely on par with 10/15 and definitely light-years ahead of 11/12.

IMPROPMPTU 2010s EUROVISION YEAR RANKING: 13 > 14 > 16 > 10 > 17 > 15 > 12 > 11 Oh and speaking of rankings,  I WILL be ranking this year. I’m fairly busy irl so it’ll take a long while, but I should be able to finish it in roughly a month :) Stayed tuned because i’ll post the first boot soon :o