#and when i tell you i solved all my problems for just a second when i was drawing this. this is like taking medication. to me
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primeillust · 3 days ago
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do NOT read go for it nakamura kun. you will find that it is about ME
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daisywords · 2 months ago
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#can I just. scream for a second#so as is news to no one#we need to start over the entire us medical system from scratch#also I would like to be flayed alive and start over from scratch in the skin department as well#anyway for context: I've had some kind of rash/acne/infection/irritation all over my legs for over a year now#have tried various products and changed habits and products to try and get rid of it to no avail#everyone said you should really just go to a dermatologist#(I was not that inclined to do so bc the previous and only time I'd seen a dermatologist it was not a good experience. very condescending#also I don't like making appointments and stuff. girl I don't have time)#but I decided to be an adult and go (my insurance info seemed to imply I could go with zero copay even)#spoilers: that was not the case#anyway so I show up and surprise surprise: it sucked#she was dismissive and condescending imo. was literally like 'well it could be A B or C but I can't tell'#'all of those are basically impossible to get rid of anyway but the things to try are X Y or Z'#I asked to try Z since X and Y are things that I already tried and did nothing (which I had told her!!!)#but she just kept being like 'you just need to stop picking at it. that's the real problem and that's what's exacerbating your scarring'#(wow thanks never thought of that!) (she also insinuated that my scarring was ugly)#girl I'm not 5 years old I understand.#unfortunately for me that is a compulsion so strong it would probably take years of directed therapy to get me to stop doing that#what I'm here to see you about is to figure out what the problem is and how to stop it from happening in the first place#and STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A COSMETIC ISSUE#it's causing me pain and discomfort that's the main problem! I would like that to stop!! and me not touching it would not solve that proble#also I wanted to ask her about something else but they were too quick about it. felt very Handled if you know what I mean#but anyway#she gave me a prescription for topical antibiotic which was the thing I had not tried#apparently my insurance doesn't cover it and it's also made of gold and plutonium or something#so she gave me a coupon for it#but get this#when I went to pick it up at the pharmacy they didn't take the coupon#the guy said. 'um this only works for the generic brand. and we don't have the generic brand'
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licorishh · 1 year ago
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Most people really don't seem to understand that friendship is a two-way street.
They expect you to wait on them hand and foot as they rant about and constantly pour on you either their issues or their passions and when you finally have something you'd like to talk about you get a "Man that sucks :/" or a "Cool" in return.
Find somebody who doesn't do that. Then you'll have your best friend.
#i know i ramble sometimes and i'm extremely grateful that my best friend puts up with it :')#but see then in return i do the same for her because it would be completely unfair for me to expect her to act like a wall for me to talk a#or when i wanna show her something and i can tell she's being polite and it doesn't personally strike her fancy I MOVE ON#and she does the same for me and we have way frickin better communication and we have a frickin rad friendship#it's give and take#and also can we bring back the idea of being able to work through some things on your own?#like i am ALL FOR having a support system that can encourage you when things go wrong but some things can be solved on your own#i shouldn't be bearing the burden of figuring out your life for you you know?#i'm absolutely willing to help but if you're just going to spend all your time complaining to me and never ever take my advice#then there comes a point at which i'm literally just acting as your therapist and that's not how friendships are supposed to work#i've become kind of the designated therapist in a lot of friendships throughout my life#and it is exhausting constantly being complained at (sometimes over very minor things)#only to have that person or people COMPLETELY ignore your advice every single time you try to give it#that's not friendship my dude that's using me because you just want someone to complain to#like i said. support system good. treating your friend like an emotional punching bag to let out your problems 24/7 very very bad.#like when i was feeling completely unlike myself and irritated and frustrated for three dang years straight#i didn't really talk about it much because i knew it wasn't the kind of thing advice was going to fix#so i wasn't in the discord servers every two seconds “MAN I REALLY JUST DON'T FEEL GOOD :///”#because when other people do this to me there comes a point at which i'm like “WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT”#like i've given you all the advice i have and you have taken absolutely none of it nor have you taken any action on your own#so now i'm just here to make you feel better about yourself and that's really not my job#emotional support is necessary. patting you on the head when you refuse to do anything to better your situation is not.#tl;dr people who refuse to do anything to better their situation other than complain to ME about it 24/7 drive me nuts#and it drives other people nuts so please don't do it to anyone#don't bottle up your emotions but also don't let them come crashing down and drown everyone you know#just because you can't be bothered to put ANY effort forth to contain them#emotional regulation is attractive~~~#society today has built such a culture of “it's not YOUR fault and if you cry about it hard enough someone will fix it for you” like no sir#sometimes it IS your fault and sometimes you DO need to take responsibility#and if it is your fault then absolutely no one but you is obligated to fix it
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jammmbi · 8 months ago
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god i need therapy and to move out
#aka i need to move out#idk how much longer i can take listening to my parents just say shit and have opinions and then expect me to feel the same way#and when i disagree suddenly i’m siding with the wrong people#when quite literally i’m trying to make you understand that your thoughts are not the only thoughts to be considered#while also trying to validate their feelings but that they’re not communicating at all and are taking it out on ppl#i am so so so tired of being the constant middleman between my family members and ultimately having to hear everyone say shit abt everyone#and expect me to immediately agree or understand#like girlies you can all be wrong and you all are and the fact that you aren’t willing to admit your wrongdoings is your first problem#your second was expecting me to hype you up and encourage your behavior#having to constantly remind myself that it’s not my responsibility to keep the peace or to solve my familial issues#and the one time i tried to explain this it was met with ‘no one’s asking you to’#which is true !!! but then why are ALL OF YOU complaining to me and only me#why are you burdening me with all of this information#and if i tell you i can’t handle it or don’t want to talk about it i’m suddenly the bad guy too#i can’t win here your honor !!! the only solution in which i win is to get OUT#and of course i can’t make anyone say or do or believe anything#i’m not naive enough to think i can#but sitting there silent isn’t helping and speaking doesn’t either and there’s no other good solution#it’s just exhausting
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szczylpierdolony · 9 months ago
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life is falling through my fingers more that usually
#i’ve been in a pretty much constant state of panic since january#and it’s gotten worse recently bc of 1. thesis writing (or lack thereof)#2. administrative problems at uni that i caused due to the constant state of anxiety and depression#like whyyyy do things like going to the uni office send me spiraling like nothing else#and i’ve been feeling weird and disconnected for a while now and nothing seems to interest me anymore#like i’m light headed in the worst way and i think if one thing goes badly i’ll genuinely fall down crying#and i can’t seem to do anything productive bc of the anxiety either#ok i checked usos. the administrative problem got more or less solved#oh thank god#i love depression loveee it love causing problems for myself that i later have to bother other people about bc i can’t solve them by myself#esp when you have to admit to them that mental illness is what caused them bc even when they’re sympathetic and nice about it i still feel#like such a pathetic idiot my god#also i’ve been thinking a lot abt how a pattern that repeats in my life is the lack of closure#from silly things to more serious ones#like how i didn’t attend my elementary school graduation nor the hs one#the first one bc of travelling and the second bc of covid#so i just closed my laptop and then went to pick up my diploma after matura results and that was it i never saw any of my teachers or#thanked them etc#and how all my friendships that died out were this kind of sudden drop like nothing happened but we just stopped talking one day and that#was it and idk where we stand#and how i seem to leave loose threads everywhere i go and i can’t tell if it’s just a coincidence or if i do that on purpose but#unconciously so as to not have to deal with things ending bc that scares me#i’ve never felt grounded in any moment and it’s so strange#also yeah yeah weird behaviour meant to save me from abandonment whatever#📓#niedziela wieczór i humor popsuty co mogę powiedzieć
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lastoneout · 7 months ago
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I do think it's a brilliant bit of character writing to have Chilchuck be allergic to sharing anything about his personal life with his friends, including the fact that his wife left him, and then you find out that the reason his wife left him is because he never fucking tells anyone anything. And then! The second he actually does explain everything Marcille literally just tells him exactly why his wife left and gives him advice on how to apologize and potentially mend their relationship, if he wants to. Almost all of Chilchuck's problems are because he's so repressed he doesn't know how to be open and honest with the people around him and they are also solved by being open and honest with the people around him. It's like...symmetrical character writing? I guess? It's just brilliant and it's what I mean when I say a character doesn't have to be complicated to be realistic and compelling. Ryōko Kui is a fuckin' genius and I'm going to be thinking about Dungeon Meshi for the rest of my life.
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makkir0ll · 9 months ago
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"you have really long eyelashes"
it catches him off guard. you guys are just laying in your bed scrolling on your own phones. he didn't even feel you staring at him. how long have you been looking?
"thanks?" he replies
"no i mean seriously like drop the lash serum." you joke at him as you continue to observe him.
they're long and thick. the kind of lashes that have a natural curl, unlike yours, that fall straight down and take several minutes to curl to your perfect liking. not to mention the layers of mascara you apply to get them to even remotely look like his.
he turns his head to you and you don't miss his dilated pupils as his eyes bore into yours. you take note of how the lashes perfectly frame his eyes. and you're so jealous.
but then an idea pops into your head, you smile to yourself and he senses it coming.
"can i-"
"no" he cuts you off.
"babe please you don't even know what i was about to say!" you grab onto his shoulder as you plead.
"whatever it is im sure it's going to be bad." he retorts, turning his face away from you and going back on his phone.
"i'll buy you you're favorite food."
and that's how you end up here on his lap with your mascara in your hand. his hair is pushed back as his hands rest on your hips, drawing small circles as he awaits your actions.
you open the bottle with the black liquid and bring the wand close to his eyes. "don't move" you whisper and he listens. mainly because he's scared that you're going to poke his eye out as you bring the wand to the base of his eyelashes and wiggle it slowly before moving it up to coat the length of the lashes. some of the mascara gets on his eyelids. you repeat the actions on the other eye before going back and doing a second coat. you can tell that he might be slightly nervous that you're going to blind him with the way he holds his breath and the grip he has on your hips get ever so slightly tighter.
you move yourself off his lap and he goes to grab his phone so he can see what he looks like.
"wait no not yet, i'm still not done" you say as you go and grab ur q-tips and micellar water.
"still?"
"yes still, i need to clean up the mascara on your eyelids," you say as you place yourself back on his lap. you open the bottle of micellar water and carefully put the clear liquid on the q-tip. you bring the white stick of cotton to his eyes and you tell him to close them. he feels the wet cotton and it's a weird feeling. you watch the q-tip turn darker the more mascara you wipe off.
"okay i'm done!" you say and he opens his eyes and you don't think he's ever looked more majestic. his already long lashes looking even longer and bolder now that he has the mascara to bring them out. you notice that the color of his eyes pop more. "you look so pretty" you smile as lean in to pepper kisses along his face. his cheeks feel warm and he can already tell that they're probably red.
he reaches over to his phone and opens the camera app and switches the camera so he can see himself. and he immediatly notices the stark difference in his eyes with the mascara. he brings his fingers to his lashes to touch them. it feels weird and his eyes kind of feel weighed down. but he has no regrets when he sees you smiling at him so fondly.
"they look nice." he smiles at you, dropping his phone to the side.
"i know right, ugh im so jealous i wish i had your lashes. all my problems would be solved." you say, thinking about the long and excruciating lash routine you perform every morning.
"all of them?"
"yes, all of them."
he chuckles at your words. "alright, but can you take it off now, it feels weird." he says, hands coming to touch his lashes again. you pout as you grab the micellar water you put away and a cotton pad and remove the mascara from his eyelashes, being gentle so that he doesn't lose a few. he appreciates the action. and maybe he would let you put more than just mascara on his face another day.
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KAGEYAMA (has the best lashes argue with the wall), suna, tsukishima (genuinely terrified that you're going to make him go blind), OSAMU, kuroo, MATSUKAWA MY LOVE, iwaizumi, OIKAWA (he would eat that shit up), akaashi, kenma, +ur fav.
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fulloflambing · 2 months ago
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࣪ . ִֶָ๋ CAPITANO: husband headcanons ♡
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pairing: capitano x afab!reader/you warnings: reader is addressed as 'wife', canon and modern!au cho's note: the kinich one did rlly good, so now lets try it with our big boi hehe. happy reads everyone! lmk if u guys want an nsfw ver. of either/both characters ;3
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this man is the definition of YEARNING.
he wasnt comfortable with the label of him being your boyfriend. with all his eternal affection and love for you? to just be a mere boyfriend? absolutely not. he just HAD to be your husband. proposed the moment he realized he loved you.
definitely proposed with a big stone :p
wears his ring 24/7 and kisses it whenever your not around and he misses you dearly.
he abuses the power of his mask and never misses the chance to stare and just admire your beauty. underneath his mask his eyes are full of love and admiration for you.
discreetly clingy. if your going out somewhere he wants to go with you 'to keep you safe' or he 'needed to pass by that area later anyway'.
hates taking off his helmet, but never stops you from sliding it off of his head to shower him with praise.
his nicknames for you are my love, dear, darling, prince/princess
his love language for you is physical touch, and words of affirmation
his favorite spots to kiss you on is your forehead, lips, the palm of your hands and your knuckles.
engraved your initials into his sword, and because of that he makes sure he takes good care of it always.
his kisses are always slow and intimate.
he is a quick-kisses or pecks HATER. he has to kiss you for atleast 10 seconds. he doesn't care if hes late, if theres someone right infront of you— he kisses you like its the last time, everytime.
more of a listener than a speaker
he likes to go on dates or do activities with you where you both have to talk to eachother a lot. like fine dining dates, late night walks or driving!
very touchy in private. he likes to snake his arm around your waist, pull your hair to the side and kiss the back of your neck.. hes just addicted to praising and carressing your body.
ever since he married you, he absolutely despises overtime. he gets bossier and meaner to his subordinates when he realizes he might have to stay a little later to supervise them. sometimes he even leaves his job or his expeditions early just to get home to you.
frequently brings you gifts. a bouquet of rare flowers, a jewelry set with special ore customized just for you, lavish wine.. you name it.
never wants to argue with you. the second you tell him he's wrong, he just immediately agrees with you, spewing "yes ma'am." "your absolutely right. i didn't think of it properly.. apologies my love."
ever since he married you, he likes to subtly flex he has you as his wife.
"Sorry, i must end this conversation early. My wife is waiting on my presence." and you can just HEAR how cocky he is to say that.
writes you longgggg letters when he has to get away from business for awhile.
regarding his letters, he made you scribble/draw a design which he got custom made to become his wax seal for said letters :) a very keen man
got you a coat matching his own!
when your crying, he likes to hug you in silence, just letting you soak him in your tears. when you've calmed down, he tells you hes there to listen if you want to talk about your feelings, and theres no problem of yours hes not willing to help you solve. in his mind, your pain is his own, and he'll always be there to support you through any troubles.
very possessive. he wants people to know your his, and hes yours.
princess treatment on TOP. carries you easily when your tired of walking, idly massages your hands or feet when your both lounging together, regularly brings you flowers
during misunderstandings, he likes to take a minute of silence to compose himself and his thoughts to make sure he doesnt say anything he doesnt mean
likes to properly sit down with you to talk out problems between the both of you, and keeps an open mind. he doesnt rush you or cut you off when your talking about your feelings, and lets you know hes present and he cares about how you feel
takes extra time and effort after an argument to remind you he loves you.
overall, capitano is a very romantic lover despite his cold resolve, and honors your wishes with his life.
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satowooo · 7 months ago
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kiss it better
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Suguru always hated it when you break up with him when you're having a mental breakdown. So what's he gonna do to make his baby feel better?
contents. slight academic rivals to lovers (barely mentioned), suguru x reader, eventual smut, fluff, cowgirl, bottom suguru, slapping, rough sex, pet names, degration, not proofread.
Do what you gotta do, keep me up all night.
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your relationship with suguru became on and off ever since you two started dating. he could vaguely remember why, but he knows one thing.
your relationship with him started off as enemies. he remembers how you were always so angry at him, your bratiness showing every time he was a step further than you in academics.
being a straight A student is something that he likes to brag about, knowing that you're right there to keep him on his toes because you're just as smart as him. he knows how you tire yourself to study every night and day, sleeping and almost living in the library whenever an exam week is coming, never going out of your room and not eating until you understood and memorized all your notes, and how you'd never talk to him the whole time you're busy studying. and what does he hates the most? you breaking up with him for it.
you're a top student, but you're always in second place because he beats you to it. it never fails to make you upset, but you don't really blame suguru for being good at what he does. rather, you blame yourself for not studying enough as if your brain is already not about to explode for every information that you try to force into your brain.
and suguru hates it enough that you have to break up with him just for you to torture yourself in the confines of your room with all the papers and academic works controlling over your body and mind. he hates it everytime because he knows how hard you are being to yourself.
“baby, i’m coming inside, okay?” suguru called outside your door after knocking several times. he didn't wait for another answer as he twists the knob, pushing the door open.
“suguru, no-”
he heard your sniffles. and his heart ache at the sight before him.
you were sitting at your study desk. papers scattered around in a mess, some of it drenched in your tears. your eyes reddened, and you looked at him in frustration as you stood up.
“i told you to leave me alone, suguru.” you said, wiping your tear stained cheek.
he looks over at your bed, to the crumpled sheets, feathers flying around from your pillow, knowing that you probably had been punching it in your frustration. he sighs and walks over to you, immediately cupping your cheeks to look you in the eyes.
“you think breaking up with me would solve the problem?” he whispers softly, kissing your eyes, your tears.
you looked away, tilting your head to the side so as to not look at him. “it's for the better. you're only distracting me from my studies.”
he closed his eyes tightly, before holding your jaw so you could face him properly. your hands clutched his shirt at the proximity between you. “i’m distracting you?” your words sting, his heart clenching at the way you're trying so hard to push him away. but he wouldn't have all that. “come on. i know you're mad. punish me then.”
“suguru-”
“i always tell you that i’m here to help. but you're too hard headed to ask for it.” his tone was firm, his eyes turning dark at the way you tried to get away from his grasp. he lets out an exasperated breath before loosening his grip from you. “don't hurt yourself, baby. hurt me instead.”
“suguru, you don't understand. i am angry, fine, i admit.” the grip you had on his shirt tightened, a shaky breath escaping from your lip as tears started to form on your eyes again. “i don’t want to take it out on you when i’m clearly a mess, suguru. you don't get it because you're always too good and i’m not enough. i can't be enough for you if i’m like this-”
once again, suguru cut you off. your words flying off his ear as he interrupted you with a fierce kiss. his tongue darting out for entrance and you didn't push him away. your words muffled from the way he pressed his lips, making you shut up and revel onto your desires as your lips parted, your tongue delving out to taste him.
all your worries easily slipped away. his thumb swiftly wiping the tear that escaped your eyes while not breaking the kiss. he pulled away for a moment before capturing it once again, this time gentler than the first.
to suguru, it was always the same words no matter how much he reassured you. so what's he going to do? make you feel like the queen you deserved to be.
“come on, princess. just like that.” he grunted, his hand gripping on your hips as he slammed you down on his cock. “come on, tell me how mad you are right now. let me hear you.”
“f-fuck you, suguru…” you gasps, your hips rocking back and forth deliciously on his shaft. your teeth were clenched in frustration, your anger still brewing inside your heart by the way he had you easily straddling him.
“that's it, baby. let it out, let it all out on me.” he coos, gently running his fingers on your spine. the action sent shivers all over your body, your thrust rapidly increasing by each second. “you're so mad, aren't you? you don't like it when i'm doing good?”
"s-stop... ahh..." you huffed, face flushed as your pussy clenched around him. your hips were beginning to ache for how harsh you were slamming against his lap. and he had that annoying look on his face that got you riled up.
you know exactly what he's trying to do. suguru wants a reaction. for you to let it out on him. to be mad at him instead of being mad at yourself.
he gripped your ass firmly, a knowing smirk etched on his lip. “do i make you cry, princess? because i’m better? in studies… and even in fucking you?”
that definitely strikes a nerve right there. your pace increasing, your nails digging on his shoulder from how hard you're holding onto him. “shut up… sh-shut up…”
“that all you got?” he said darkly, sweat forming in his forehead. he gave your ass a firm squeeze before landing a smack, making you jolt in pleasure. “you're so fucking pathetic, princess. you're really crying over that? you look so fucking dumb with my cock inside-”
a harsh slap on his cheek echoed all over the room. your breathing coming in short gasps, while suguru was smiling. he was fucking smiling.
the slap reddened his cheek but it didn't even look like it hurt him. he huffed and squeezed your hip. suguru was drowned in pure bliss as he groaned, your hips thrusting so harshly, squeezing his cock like there's no tomorrow.
“fuck, baby…” he growled, the sting of your slap erotic and pleasurable that it got him ramming his hip upward. you could see the veins on his neck popping out, his eyes darkening as his fingers found your breasts. “fuck y-yeah… do that again, hm? show me how much you fucking hate me…”
you moaned, your back arching and body pressing against his chest. his lips latched on your nipple, while his other hand found your clit. he rubbed circles against it, making you cry and scratch your nails on his chest.
“you’re so worked up for all your studies, and for what?” he sneered, chuckling darkly at you. you bit your lip as another slap went across his cheek, feeling all the anger forcing its way to give him what he wants. you knew damn well that suguru was enjoying on riling you up, coaxing you to take it out on him by saying those words that he knew would gain the right reaction that he needs.
“fuck you, sugu… f-fuck you…”
“doing so well for me, baby.” he leaned forward to capture your lips, his lips grazing your earlobe. “you can do more than that, don't you?”
your thrusts became more erratic as his voice rang over your ears. you grabbed a handful of his hair, tugging it down so he could look at you. your face was a mix of both anger and pleasure, a sight that made suguru feel more aroused. he groaned as your hand flew over on his cheek again, his eyes glistening with lust.
“ohh, f-fuck!” the thumb on your clit increased its pace, as slaps after slaps on his face kept coming, eager to erase that stupid grin on his lips.
suguru grunted, his moans getting louder each second that it syncs with your sounds. your hand traveled up his throat, pressing on gently enough to restrict his breathing.
he let out a strangled laugh causing you to land another slap on his face. he can't believe that he felt so fucked out, enjoying the pleasure and roughness that you were giving him. the angered look on your face made his cock twitch inside you.
your hips thrusts up and down. up and down. unrelenting. it became frantic as his cock hit your right spots, driving you wild in ecstasy.
he could feel your pussy clenching around his cock, your thrusts became more urgent, your gripped on his neck beginning to tighten. his eyes were tied shut, suguru’s chest heaving as your wetness engulfed his cock.
“i’m cumming, baby. f-fuck, you gon’ cum, princess? you're doing so good- f-fucking hell…”
he hears your whines. his name rolling out of your tongue in desperation to reach your high. he bucked his hips, thrusting forward to meet yours, pistoning in and out furiously as the pleasure built up.
“suguru! ahh! hhk-” your hips shattered, your body convulsing with your orgasm reaching its peak. suguru let out a growl in pleasure, his hands squeezing your ass firmly. his own orgasm quickly approached, hot semen spurting right inside your sweet hole.
he breathes heavily, thrusting his cum right inside you slowly, making sure that nothing would come to waste. your hands released his neck, seeing how it turned red by the way you gripped so harshly. even his face was all flushed from all the slapping you did, with a small bruise forming on his temple, but suguru had a grin on his face.
his hair disheveled, chest heaving as you both catch your breaths. “still mad, baby?”
you shake your head, looking at him apologetically. “not anymore. i’m sorry, did i hit you too hard?”
suguru chuckled, his eyes half-lidded from the pleasure you just gave him. he took your hand in his, kissing your palm softly. “i fucking loved it, baby.”
he looks at you lovingly. suguru has already memorized you like the back of his hands, from your body to your heart and beneath your soul. and he'll do anything to make you feel better, to make you feel loved and cared for. he adores you so much that he wouldn't allow letting your insecurities pull you down.
suguru holds your hips, rocking yourself gently on his cock. your eyes rolling back, a soft moan escaping from your lips. he smiled, resting his head on the crook of your neck. “you're enough, baby. always remember that, okay?” he looked up at you before placing a kiss on your forehead. you basked into the aftermath of your lovemaking, your head falling on his chest as you nodded at his words. “don't ever doubt your abilities. failure is inevitable, it's a part of ourselves that symbolizes the efforts we do for trying.” suguru whispers, gently placing kisses all over your face. “and i love you for all your flaws and failures. don't ever think that you're not enough for me.”
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🙂‍↕️ i genuinely want to make an academic rivals to lovers fic/series with suguru
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txrully · 12 days ago
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hii can I request blue lock boys comforting their s/o thats on her period? (if your uncomfy w this than jst ignore it)
Thank you! 💕💕
YOU'RE MY COMFORT!
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·˚ ༘ ꒱ summary when they comfort their s/o who's on her period
·˚ ༘ ꒱ characters isagi yoichi , bachira meguru , itoshi rin , nagi seishiro , mikage reo , chigiri hyoma , hiori yo , shidou ryusei , itoshi sae , michael kaiser , alexis ness
·˚ ༘ ꒱ warning fem!reader implied , lowercase intended
·˚ ༘ ꒱ a/n eeeek i took a kinda long hiatus after exams so sorry this was late- TT
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·˚ ༘ ꒱ isagi yoichi
isagi would be so sweettttt. like he’s 100% the type to google how to make your girlfriend feel better on her period and then go overboard. he shows up at your door with snacks, a hot water bottle, and a look of absolute determination.
“babe, i got chocolate, tea, and this random teddy bear i found. will that help??”
he also tries to distract you with soccer highlights and ends up ranting about strategy while you just cuddle into him. lwk adorable.
"yoichi, i don’t need all this, i’m fine—"
"nope. it’s my job to make sure you’re 100% okay!"
"…you’re too much."
"too much in love with you? absolutely."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ bachira meguru
bachira treats your period like it’s an adventure. he calls it “battle week” and declares himself your knight in shining armor. he’s running around like a maniac, making you laugh so hard you forget the pain.
he also makes you random art to cheer you up. one time, he drew a stick figure comic of you fighting a “period dragon” with a sword made of chocolate. you almost cried laughing.
"meguru, what is this??"
"you slaying your period. literally."
"you’re so dumb… but i love it."
"mission accomplished!!!!! >:D "
·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi rin
rin is… awkward. but he triessss. when you first tell him, he just blinks and goes, "okay. what do you need?" and when you say “nothing,” he goes into silent problem-solving mode.
he might not say much, but he’ll keep you company, bring you your favorite drinks, and make sure you’re comfortable. he’s like a walking checklist. it’s so sweet how seriously he takes it.
"rin, you don’t have to—"
"you said you have a headache, so i’m staying until it stops."
"you’re so stubborn-"
"you’re welcome."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ nagi seishiro
nagi is… so chill. you tell him you’re on your period, and he’s like, "oh. okay. do you wanna nap?" because in his mind, that fixes everything.
but the second you actually need something? he’s ( surprisingly ) up and moving faster than you thought possible. he’ll even let you steal his hoodie and hog all the blankets.
"sei, can you pass me the—"
"already got it. now come back to bed."
"why are you so good at this???"
"because i'm used to this by now."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ mikage reo
reo treats it like a high-stakes situation. he buys you EVERYTHING—snacks, heating pads, your favorite drinks, and even a blanket that looks like a giant burrito.
“what else do you need? should i call a doctor? a masseuse? build you a pillow fort?”
he’s over the top ( *cough* more than usual *cough* ), but it’s so sweet you can’t even be mad.
"reo, you don’t need to do all this—"
"yes, i do. you’re in pain, and i don’t like it."
"you’re insane."
"insanely in love with you, yep."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ chigiri hyoma
chigiri is so calm and collected about it. he’s like, “i got this.” he makes you tea, rubs your back, and lets you vent about how annoying it all is.
he also takes you on peaceful walks or sits with you by the window, brushing your hair and talking about random things to keep your mind off the cramps. it’s giving romance movie vibes.
"hyoma, you’re like… weirdly good at this."
"i have a sister. i’ve trained for this moment."
"oh my god, of course you have."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ hiori yo
hiori is the gentlest bean. he’s like, “do you need anything? want me to get you soup? should we watch your favorite movie?” he’s so soft and accommodating, it’s almost ridiculous.
he also writes you little notes to cheer you up, like: “you’re stronger than cramps 💪 i believe in you!!”
"hiori, this note is so cheesy—"
"but did it make you smile?"
"…yeah, it did."
"then it worked. :D "
·˚ ༘ ꒱ shidou ryusei
shidou is chaotic as ever, but surprisingly… thoughtful? he shows up with junk food, a heating pad, and an attitude like, “let’s beat this period’s ass together.”
he’s also the type to jokingly pick a fight with your u t e r u s ( you read that right ), yelling things like: “how dare you hurt my girl?! square up, you coward!” it’s dumb, but it works.
"ryu, stop yelling at my uterus—"
"not until it apologizes."
"you’re so stupid."
"but you’re laughing, so i win."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi sae
sae is quietly attentive. he doesn’t say much, but he notices everything—like the way you hold your stomach or wince when you move. suddenly, you’ve got a hot water bottle and your favorite drink in your hand, no explanation needed.
he’ll sit with you in comfortable silence, scrolling on his phone until you’re ready to talk. it’s subtle, but you feel so cared for.
"sae, you didn’t have to get all this—"
"you’re in pain. of course i did."
"…thanks."
"don’t mention it."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ michael kaiser
kaiser is so dramatic about it. the second you tell him, he’s like, “mein gott, my poor love! what can i do?!” he acts like you're about to be taken from him.
but honestly? he’s surprisingly good at making you laugh and keeping your spirits up. he’ll even let you boss him around for the day.
"michael, stop being so dramatic—"
"i can’t help it! your pain is my pain!"
"you’re ridiculous."
"and you love me for it."
·˚ ༘ ꒱ alexis ness
ness is the sweetest little bean. he immediately offers to make you tea and snuggle on the couch with your favorite blanket. he’s like a human heater—so warm and comforting.
he also sends you texts like, “you’re doing amazing, sweetheart 💖 cramps don’t stand a chance against you!” pure angel.
"ness, you’re being so extra—"
"only because you deserve it!"
"you’re such a dork."
"your dork 🥰."
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© txrully
copy/translate/plagiarize/repost my works in any way and i will be under your bed 🥰
likes + reblogs always appreciated <3
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geneviveleocardius · 14 days ago
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silco and his way of loving you
my man
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silco is a man of plans and ambition, but when it comes to you, everything else takes a backseat. you are his exception, the one person he trusts entirely.
if anyone threatens you, silco’s rage is terrifying. he’s a man who built a criminal empire; he knows how to destroy enemies utterly and ruthlessly. for you, he wouldn’t hesitate to dismantle all of it.
silco ensures your safety with meticulous planning. from hidden bodyguards to secure safehouses, you might not even realize how many layers of protection he’s arranged for you.
silco isn’t the type to shower you with grand romantic gestures. instead, his love is shown in the little things: making sure you have everything you need, fixing things before you even know there’s a problem, and quietly watching over you when you’re vulnerable.
silco is not overly physical, but when you’re alone, he’ll let his guard down. a hand on your lower back, fingers brushing against yours, or his thumb tracing your jaw when he cups your face—these moments mean everything coming from him.
at night, when the stress of the day fades, he’ll let his mask slip. silco holds you close, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin as he whispers plans and dreams only meant for you to hear.
his sharp tongue spares no one, not even you, but there’s an unmistakable fondness in his teasing. he loves when you fire back, and the smirk that plays on his lips tells you he’s impressed by your wit.
silco has a knack for giving you nicknames that sound mocking but secretly melt his heart. whether it’s “darling,” “my torment,” or “trouble,” there’s always a hint of affection in his tone.
silco is a master of manipulation, but with you, there’s no need for pretense. you see the parts of him no one else does: the man who doubts, aches, and dreams. in you, he’s found someone he can truly rely on.
when the world feels like it’s pulling him into the abyss, you’re the one who keeps him grounded. he might be zaun’s eye, but you’re his anchor.
you’re the only person who sees the rare moments of guilt or pain flicker across his face. when his walls come down, he doesn’t speak much, but the way he clings to you says everything.
silco has no issue getting his hands dirty, but when it comes to you, he’ll even set aside his pride if it means making you happy. whether it’s something as small as an apology or something as monumental as changing his plans, he’ll do it for you.
silco is fiercely possessive, but he trusts you enough not to smother you. still, the way his sharp gaze lingers on anyone who gets too close is enough to send most people running.
silco may not be one for flowery words, but when he tells you, “you’re mine,” it’s a vow that carries more weight than any traditional declaration of love.
being loved by silco means being the most precious thing in a dangerous world. his love is intense, consuming, and unyielding—but with it comes a promise that you’ll never face anything alone.
silco’s love is quiet but intense, like a slow-burning fire. he isn’t the type to shout his feelings or wear his heart on his sleeve, but everything he does is for you. he shows his love through actions—ensuring your comfort, solving your problems before you even know they exist, and always putting you first.
he respects your independence but always watches out for you from the shadows. his way of saying “i love you” is often subtle: a rare, vulnerable gaze held a moment too long, or a quiet “stay safe” that carries more weight than any grand declaration.
silco’s kisses are measured and intense, like he’s savoring every second. he doesn’t rush, letting the moment linger as if nothing else exists.
in private moments of tenderness, he’ll press a soft kiss to your forehead, his way of silently promising to protect you.
he loves to tease you with playful, possessive nips during a kiss, a reminder of the passion simmering beneath his calm exterior.
he has a habit of kissing the sensitive spot just below your ear when he wants to make you melt, his voice low as he murmurs something teasing or affectionate.
silco thrives on making your life easier. whether it’s handling a problem you didn’t want to deal with or silently taking care of something before you even notice it, he shows his love through his competence and reliability.
though his life is busy and chaotic, he always carves out time for you. these moments are sacred to him, whether it’s sitting in comfortable silence or talking late into the night.
while he isn’t overly expressive, silco’s words, when he chooses to speak, carry immense weight. he knows exactly how to reassure you, lift you up, or show his admiration with sharp, carefully chosen phrases.
he loves the way your hands feel in his—smaller, softer, yet steady. he’ll hold your hand under the table during tense meetings or brush his fingers over yours in quiet moments, finding comfort in the connection.
silco is intense but never reckless. he approaches intimacy with the same deliberate care he applies to everything else, making sure you feel adored and completely satisfied.
he knows every inch of your body and every reaction you have. nothing escapes his notice, and he takes his time learning exactly what makes you feel good.
silco likes to take control, but he’s not harsh—he’s commanding, confident, and endlessly patient. he makes you feel safe while igniting a fire you didn’t know existed.
intimacy is one of the few times he allows himself to be completely unguarded with you. his whispered confessions and soft touches reveal a man who trusts you in ways he trusts no one else.
silco loves to keep you on your toes with sly comments and sarcastic humor. “oh, you think you can outsmart me? charming, but unlikely,” he’ll say with a smirk when you challenge him.
even after all this time, the way he looks at you can make your heart race. his sharp, calculating gaze softens into something warmer, more intimate, when his eyes meet yours across a crowded room.
a hand on the small of your back, a light brush of his fingers against yours, or a firm grip on your waist remind you that you’re his.
he’ll catch you off guard with unexpected praise. “you’re too brilliant for your own good, you know that?” he says, his tone half-teasing but completely sincere.
silco thrives on stolen moments of intimacy. even in the middle of a busy day, he’ll pull you aside, his voice low and suggestive as he murmurs, “do you have any idea how distracting you are?”
being loved by silco is like being claimed by a storm—intense, consuming, and completely unshakable. he’s not just your lover; he’s your partner, protector, and equal, and he makes sure you never doubt how deeply he adores you.
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fqlling4it · 4 months ago
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teenager in love | lando norris x popstar! reader
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris, pietra.pilao and others
yourusername me and the boyfie
view all 23,267 comments
user36 hello????
↳ yourusername hey girl 😁
user31 since when ????
↳ user19 nah that’s what i’m saying because she dropped a breakup song and dipped and comes back with a boyfriend ????
lilymhe why am i just finding out about this ???
↳ yourusername sorry babes, i’ll text you! 💗
user81 mother leaves for a year and a half and comes back with a boyfriend ???
user4 who cares? let me be your boyfie instead
↳ user373 get UP bro
sabrinacarpenter pretty pretty girl
↳ yourusername ahhh love you 💗
landonorris
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell, and others
landonorris aug 24. sun and things ☀️
view all 23,171 comments
user63 woah woah woah
↳ user84 he really though he could just sneak in that second photo and we wouldn’t notice
maxfewtrell great girl you’ve got mate
↳ landonorris she says it was nice to meet you
oscarpiastri seems like you’ve had a great summer
↳ landonorris wonderful break with some time away from you 😂
user71 thirst trapping like it’ll make us ignore that second pic
user4 he has a girlfriend????
alex_albon finally! no more fifth wheeling george and i (lily says hi)
↳ landonorris years in the making! (she says hi back!)
yourusername added to their story!
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[story 1: ootd 💗]
[story 2: picnic turned into lego building!]
view story replies
landonorris you didn’t post my finished product ☹️
↳ yourusername it would’ve ruined the softlaunch i fear 💔
landonorris just hardlaunch, problem solved 😁
↳ yourusername after the song releases
landonorris song???
carmenmmundt you two are so cute, it was great having a double date the other day! 💗
↳ yourusername no third wheeling you and george anymore ☺️
carmenmmundt my baby’s all grown up now ☹️💔
user73 is that a mclaren lego set girlie? 🤔
user4 nooooooooooo please just one chance i beg 🙏
lilymhe this is still insane to me
↳ yourusername you literally knew i had a crush on him 😞
lilymhe i thought it was a joke, i would’ve done some matchmaking baby
↳ yourusername god bless your boyfriend (🤮) for getting us together ☺️
sabrinacarpenter girl get your ass in the studio and leave the man
↳ yourusername what if i tell you i wrote a song about him ☺️
sabrinacarpenter hmmm cute, send it my way baby 🥰
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, sabrinacarpenter and others
yourusername teenager in love out at midnight! (no official photoshoot this time, enjoy the photos my man took 😁)
view all 18,372 comments
lilymhe hello????
↳ yourusername hi lily!!! 😁
user821 mother may have a boyfriend but at least we get a new song
landonorris so excited to hear it!!
↳ yourusername hope you like it 💗
user832 mother just one lyric please please 🙏
↳ yourusername and you make me feel like i’ll be forever young 😁
user4 gonna pretend this songs about me instead of her man ☺️
↳ user81 bro get UP
landonorris
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liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername and others
landonorris girlfie’s new song is out, enjoy! (yes, it’s about me 😁) yourusername
view all 19,382 comments
yourusername my boyfie 💗
↳ landonorris my girlfie 💗
sabrinacarpenter that’s my girlfie btw
↳ yourusername love love love you pretty girl 😘
user4 him of all people ???? him????
↳ yourusername pls refrain from being mean to my boyfie, he’s cute and i love him 😁💗
alex_albon next double date when ?
↳ georgerussell63 make that a triple date
↳ landonorris soon soon, asking the girlfie now!
user832 ok they’re kinda cute though
↳ user93 no fr, the way he made a whole post about her new song ???
user81 mama y papa
oscarpiastri no more moping around the garage that she can’t be there 🙏
↳ landonorris i do NOT mope, false allegations
user12 ok but have yall even listened to the lyrics ????
↳ user89 like they’re so cute together ☹️
lilymhe hard launched finally?
↳ landonorris indeed! made me wait until she released MY song 😁
yourusername added to their story!
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[story 1: passenger princess life 🙌🙌]
[story 2: little dinner celebration 💗]
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magicalmanhattanproject · 1 year ago
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listen to me y'all. listen. hear me out. i know the hesitating to kill the monsters with your children's face angst is spicy. i know it's tempting. don't fall for it.
phil didn't fucking hesitate for a second. he's the one who got everyone else to stop hesitating. once he logged back in, he attacked the codes immediately and shouted for everyone else to do the same. he hates the imposters and he hates them more for daring to use his children's faces. the angst isn't the idea that he would struggle to obliterate a threat to his family.
no, the angst is what happens after.
the angst is the next time tallulah needs her papa's attention when he has his airpods in and she shakes her maracas and he doesn't hear and she has to decide between asking him about the botantical garden and "it shook its maracas too much so i killed it"
the angst is the next time chayanne is feeling clingy or scared and wants to stick close to his father's side but in the back of his mind is just "it got close to me too much so i killed it"
the angst is that phil can see their fear because he knows them and he reassures him as much as he can that he would never hurt them and he would always know the real them but all of them have to live with the question of "but what if you don't"
the angst is phil giving them passwords and code phrases to memorize to prove its really them to soothe their fear of him not being able to recognize them because he solves his problems in the most straightforward, practical way he can but now they're just scared of what if the codes learn the passwords and phil explains that the passwords are just another layer of protection they're not everything and then they're right back where they started
the angst is two children huddled up together in a hotel away from the windows trying to decide if it would be better for their father to kill them by mistake or die by the hand of a monster wearing their face because he didn't think to strike first
the angst is chayanne privately asking phil the question he's trying desperately to pretend tallulah hasn't also thought of: what happens if wilbur comes back and it isn't wilbur?
the angst is phil replying with "he's my son too. i'll recognize him." and he doesn't remember everything from before the island but there's an old ache in his wing that seems to tell him that recognition may not have been enough
the angst isn't that phil hesitates. the angst is that phil doesn't. the angst is that phil loves his children too much to hesitate. the angst is that sometimes doing the best you possibly can by your children will still fuck them up so so so bad
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yestrday · 10 months ago
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― YANDERE! GENSHIN ACADEMY AU. pt one | two | three | four | five
⇢ alhaitham, kaveh, tighnari, cyno + ayato, baizhu, mika / gn! reader
introducing! from sumeru hails teyvat's brightest minds, and it's no surprise that many of the academu's smartest are true-blood sumerians. a lesser known fact is that these are less skilled in the workings of the heart, and therefore, a bit more unstable than the average lad.
warning! yandere, obsessive & possessive behavior, unhealthy relationships, master-pet dynamics, mentions of bullying, physical wounds
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— STOIC ACADEMIC TYPE. alhaitham | الهيثم
[ “if you’re looking to get my help, i’d rather you just outright say it than dilly-dallying around.” ]
⇢ one of the geniuses in your second year, haitham is a no-nonsense type of guy that has that air of arrogance around him. he’s quite hard to approach, and he doesn’t care to socialize with any of your circles. he has, however, taken a liking to you, and will usually just drag you around whenever he feels like it.
⇢ expect forced study sessions with him in the library. he’s very keen on making sure your grades are in tip-top shape, even though you never asked him for help. it’s obvious that he takes a bit of sadistic pleasure when you ask him for his help. when you ask him on how to solve a problem, he stops whatever he’s reading and scrutinizes you with those stoic eyes, before a small and smug grin forms on his face. sometimes you’re not sure if he truly wants to help you or he just likes to hear you plead and beg.
⇢ kinda likes to see you screw up as well. seeing you excel (because he helped you, after all) is all nice and good, but he likes to see you fumble it every once in a while. sometimes you get a bit arrogant, refusing his help and insisting that you can do it by yourself, only for it to backfire in your face. when you run back to him with your begging and pleading, he puts on a show of being nonchalant about it. didn’t you say you were fine? so why bother him now, and especially in the middle of a good book?
⇢doesn’t hide the fact that he sort of treats you like a pet, with the way he drags you to and fro. his blunt everyday tone makes everyone feel like he’s looking down at them, but even more so with the way he talks to you. stay, he says when you start approaching him. sit, he tells you. whether you follow or not is up to you, and while he does love having an obedient pet, there is some fun to be found in keeping a bratty one.
⇢likes to see you rely on him. is it out of genuine care or because he sees you as a complete fool who can’t do anything on their own, time will tell, but he’s strangely insistent about you depending on him. he doesn’t make it very obvious, especially when he acts like he could give two shits about anything, but when you mention having troubles, he says things like “that is what you’re having trouble with?” without offering his help, you usually start nagging him for the answer.
⇢haitham isn’t one for praise but… he does get a kick off you praising him. not because he’s starved for it (he’s had heaps of that ever since he showed his academic prowess) but because it felt just right. he does help you a lot, doesn’t he? taking the time out of his busy day to help you with whatever silly thing you need. the least you could do is thank him for it.
[ “honestly, you ought to be more grateful with how much i’m always helping you.” ]
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– PASSIONATE TYPE. kaveh | کاوه
[ “oh yeah, uh, i guess i did win that! do… do you like it?” ]
⇢ your senior kaveh who’s been all over you ever since your first year. he’s a bit clingy with his touches, holding onto your arm while you walk and greeting you with hugs ever since the two of you got close. whenever the two of you see each other in the hallways, he immediately latches onto you and doesn’t let go. will drag you around while chatting your ear off.
⇢ often starts to show off when you’re around. he tries to be really nonchalant about it too, like casually trying to slip in his accomplishment in the middle of a conversation to make it seem like he’s not trying too hard. when you smile and compliment him, he starts to stutter and blush, losing the cool composure he tried to maintain just moments ago. the others tease him for being a senior who wants to impress his junior and he quickly denies it (“they’re just saying what they want!” he’d huff to you), but you can’t deny the red blush and the pleased smile on his face.
⇢ always trying to help other people out, even if he’s too busy. while he’ll drop everything he’s doing when you ask him a favor, he also doesn’t have the heart to say no to others. some days, he gets a bit disheveled by dismissal after helping out so many people at once. when he starts whining to you and he becomes even clingier, be understanding and let him. he’s had a rough day, after all.
⇢ everyone knows the shenanigans that occur around you in school and kaveh is no exception. so he’s made a bit paranoid every day, wondering when of your crazed suitors will snap and just kidnap you. he could just do it himself and not worry about being separated from you, but he thinks he’s above such things (true, but only without the proper motivation). to compensate for this, he spends every second with you like it’s his last.
⇢ did you just hold his hand?!? that must mean something, right?! he conveniently forgets that you’ve held hands with numerous other people in this academy, but you can’t blame the poor dude, he’s the type to overthink stuff like that. he’s gone over seemingly normal moments between you two countless times in his head, wondering if any of that meant something. at the back of his head, he knows he’s overreacting. but then he remembers when you gave him some papers and your fingers lingered for some seconds then he starts squealing in his pillow, absolutely deluded by his fantasies.
⇢ he’s not the jealous type…! really! he knows how kind and sweet you are. he knows that the praises you have for him are genuine and the way you look at him in admiration is all real. you’re not the type to fake those after all…! even so… even so, you continue to look at others with that same look, and praise them with the same praise. it’s not that they don’t deserve it but… is he not just good enough? to have your praises reserved for only him… was he just not worthy of that?!
[ “did i… did i do something wrong…? please, just talk to me, look at me!” ]
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— SASSY TYPE. tighnari | الطغنري
[ “those idiots… honestly, they could at least treat you with a little more care!” ]
⇢ straightforward and no-nonsense, tighnari is well-respected among his peers for being an academic with an honest personality. especially in a school where anything can just tip anyone off, tighnari does not care about who he has to offend to make them back off. as such, many suitors can’t just do their trickery to you whenever he’s watching, lest he call them out on the spot.
⇢ he’s very concerned about your wellbeing. he’s often warning you about the dangers of the men you surround yourself with. whether you believe him or not is up to you, but that won’t stop him from trying to prevent anything from happening to you. obviously, he can’t just say that someone’s killed someone— he doesn’t want to ruin your life like that— but he’s often cryptic, hoping that you’ll figure it out for yourself.
⇢ very naggy, though he nags like a disappointed mother rather than a caring one. you and cyno are often at the end of these rants when you two do something stupid (either together or as individuals), but it’s a sign that tighnari truly cares about you. he could care less whether haitham cut himself on one of his books, but when you do he’s immediately all over you and berating you for being stupid and careless.
⇢ becomes too smug whenever you show a preference for him. he loves feeling when you choose him over anyone else and the suitors stew in their anger when he shoots them a haughty grin. cyno often has to remind him that he’s being too much, but he knows how much tighnari delights in defeating the other harem members without even having to do anything. you chose him out of your own free will, and that says a lot more than having you forced to pick him.
⇢ being raised on botany and all its properties, tighnari’s almost an expert in all things plants and that includes their… chemistry. it’s no surprise that he’s one of the suitors who are capable of concocting their little mixtures. when using it on other competitors, he’s not one to dirty his hands. he often has cyno slipping a thing or two in their drinks (or in special cases, an overly desparate kaveh). but when it comes to tampering with your drink? well, he reserves that special privilege for himself, all for the pleasure of watching the chemicals slowly affect you.
⇢ a smart guy, who knows that the way to your heart is not intimidating you into it but instead playing the nice and concerned friend. poor you, always being chased around by these unstable men. why have them who will only hurt you, when you can come to him, someone that you can trust? even if your vision is slipping away, your body becomes heavy… you can trust him, no matter what~
[ “feeling sleepy already? dear me, your body is really fragile… and cute ♪” ]
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— GUARD DOG TYPE. cyno | κύων 
[ “if they’re bothering you again, talk to me. i’ll be the one to handle it.” ]
⇢ serious cyno who amuses you with his corny jokes delivered with a stoic expression. despite looking so mature, being with cyno often gets you two into trouble that he didn’t foresee. it has something to do with that intimidating expression and the way he’s ready to fight anyone who nears him. people mistake him for challenging them to a fight, and more often than not you’re left watching cyno beat down opponents in self-defense.
⇢ when people aren’t busy trying to fight him, cyno’s always seen patrolling the campus halls as head of the security committee. you can tell who’s been caught by him before by the way they flinch and avoid his piercing gaze. even many of his admirers are a bit terrified of him, and all they can do is just watch him walk over to you and whisper in your ear. they think you’re in trouble, but in reality, he’s telling you to meet him at the same meeting spot because he wants to show you this rare genius invocation card he just bought.
⇢ no one in his friend group takes him seriously anymore, not when he’s busy challenging all of them to a tcg fight every get-together. they tend to get roped up into his antics, and you can see how boys really will just be boys as the four of them begin to one-up each other into petty competitions. and cyno’s always been the most competitive out of them.
⇢ cyno seems to have a habit of suddenly showing up moments before one of your suitors plans to do something. they might start to sneak into your lockers to steal something when they see cyno leaning casually against the wall with a knowing glint in his eye. or when one of them spikes your drink and cyno unhesitatingly takes your glass and dump it on the floor, without breaking eye contact with the suspect. the guard dog that you don’t know about.
⇢ part of the protective stalker group within your suitors who make sure to follow you from the shadows whenever he has free time. these stalkers are often chill with each other, nodding at each other in acknowledgment whenever they bump into each other in one of their stalking escapades. he keeps a close eye on you at all times, with your security purely his concern and nothing else.
⇢ indifferent to getting his hands bloody. he’s not unreasonable— he knows that he can’t kill someone just because he’s jealous or something like that. he can’t risk doing something that will have an impact on you. but justice has to be served, and when he sees someone hurt you or become a threat to your safety… he just can’t help it. whether it’s mixing nari’s poison or simply giving them a cold, swift death, everything he does is because he loves you so.
[ “hush, there’s nothing to cry about. they’re gone, no one will hurt you. i have served you justice.” ]
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— SCHEMING TYPE. kamisato ayato | 神里綾人
[ “oho? it pains me that you’re so wary of me, even after all these years!” ]
⇢ senior ayato who always has that gentle but calculating mask on, socializing with many people but never close to any of them. when people start realizing that you might have caught his interest, they have warned you about him and whatever shady motives he might harbor. but whenever he approached you, he was so kind and generous with his offerings… not that you were fooled.
⇢ he’s always showering you with gifts whenever you’re together like he’s trying to flex his wealth. bump into him at the mall? he tells you to walk with him for a bit, but you leave with a luxury item you eyed for a few seconds. bundles you up in his scarf when you’re feeling chilly, however when you try to return it to him on the next day he just tells you to keep it so casually like the fabric doesn’t cost you your life savings.
⇢ when class isn’t keeping them both apart, thoma is always seen attending to ayato’s side. it’s not a secret that thoma can go to school because the kamisatos are funding his education, so no one really questions it. they do get a little bit suspicious whenever the two seem a little… intimate, but in the end, who really cares?
⇢ you should really heed others’ warnings about ayato, because it’s clear that he’s a dangerous fellow. he seems to know everything about everyone. once, he had threatened your bullies off with a thinly veiled threat regarding their shady pasts. you don’t know how he got hold of such rare information, but it seems that he’s one of the many people at this school with an information network under their fingertips.
⇢ while he does view you with adoration, it’s clear with how he talks to you that he doesn’t view you as his equal. with the way he talks you down sometimes like he’s talking to a pet rather than a fellow student, you sometimes feel a bit… demeaned. but when ayato tucks your hair behind your ear so tenderly, you have to second-guess your apprehensions.
⇢ the difference between you two is clear. he is the elite of the elite and you are… you. and he takes advantage of this without guilt. it starts as off remarks, about how you wouldn’t survive a day in their society, then it transforms into something bigger. before you know it, he’s criticizing your clothes, your posture, your personality… anything to nail in the fact that you. are. different. till you lose your pride and self-worth. till ayato makes sure that you won’t have the willpower to fight back once he begins his schemes.
[ “but i’m not lying, am i? you are different, and we can’t really do anything about that, can we?” ]
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— SUSPICIOUS TYPE. baizhu | 白术
[ “another trip to the nurse, i see… if i didn’t know better, i would think you were here to see me.” ]
⇢ senior baizhu is head of the health committee and is often seen helping out at the nurse’s. his kind and gentle nature makes the sterile place feel a lot more comforting and he attends to each patient without complaint. but when you come over, the nurse remarks how baizhu seems a bit more stressed whenever he frets over you. you’re not quite sure… after all, baizhu has always been so caring towards you and everyone else.
⇢ he’s sickly himself, so sometimes he has to rely on others for help. he does seem to ask you for help more so than the others, but you really shouldn’t mind. after all, he’s done so much for you! he’s prone to fainting, thankfully not that severe, but you have to catch him in your arms before he hits the floor. the way he thanks you and softly utters your name has you almost dropping him, and you swear there’s a cheeky grin on his face that’s gone a second after.
⇢ although his reputation is generally favorable, there are whispers that he and his family are involved in shady medical research. baizhu, when asked about these, will always only laugh and shake his head. ‘let them say what they want to say’, he would tell them. ‘what matters is that i’m capable of tending to them when they come to me for help.’ such thoughtful words often erase whatever doubts they have about baizhu and even make them guilty for even falsely accusing him.
⇢ but they’re right, though. they are a big pharmaceutical company, and every massive corporation has its shadows. a solo research that he’s been working on is in the area of immortality. in recent years, he’s been working on it with much more fervor now that he’s met you. back then, his goal for immortality was always directionless, only researching for the sake of curiosity. but now he has a clear goal: to spend eternity with you and for you.
⇢ he’s an expert businessman and your harem members are well aware of that. among them, he’s known to make many shady deals, especially since he’s so knowledgeable in… drugs. he makes a lot of profit from this, but another clear advantage is his time with you. though these rich students could just buy their drugs literally anywhere, no one quite provides the safety of not being caught like baizhu.
⇢ … might make those deals because more often than not, they end up with you in the nurse’s office. whether bruised from the bullying of another suitor or disoriented from some sort of poison, you rush to the nurse before things get worse for you. you’re so smart, he’d praise you as he tends to the wounds. there is a pleasure in bandaging you up, knowing full well that he could easily dig his nails into the cuts and leave you more in need of his help.
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— ANXIOUS TYPE. mika schmidt 
[ “they’re very cool but i… maybe i shouldn’t get too close…” ]
⇢ lil bro gets pushed around by the meaner people in his year and he doesn’t even question it. it’s just very easy to take advantage of him, with his eager-to-please personality and his notable ability to do almost anything exceptionally well. it takes him being adopted into the first-year harem group before the bullying dies down (mainly because most of the people there are well-known and powerful). he doesn’t quite understand how they could bond over a person (you) and was originally quite frightened at their almost fanatic worship of you.
⇢ no one would think he’s part of your harem, not with the way he desperately tries to avoid you. in fact, you could count the times you’ve talked to him on two hands. on all times he was a blushing and stuttering mess to the point that he was incoherent. xingqiu seemed to take a kick out of his embarrassment, while aether softly coaxed him into forming a full sentence in front of you. what stuck with you was how he refused to shake your hand, to which xingqiu bowled over laughing. 
⇢ when he got a little bit more comfortable with you, he was still shy albeit not much to the point that he wasn’t willing to offer you help. you’d often bump into each other while you’re on your errand, and he takes half the workload. most of the time, the two of you work in silence, with mika taking frequent glances at you. when you’re done, he says a meek ‘goodbye!’ and sprints off.
⇢ stalks you around school like a little creep, but thankfully not to the point where he follows you home. he’d peek from around a corner, watching you in the distance with wide eyes in admiration. you’re always so hardworking and excellent… it’s no wonder you have so many admirers! he was almost caught by you a few times, but thankfully you’re none the wiser. his stalking is painfully obvious to the other harem members, but they think him harmless enough that they don’t pay him any mind.
⇢ things that you need the most are always miraculously appearing in your bag, locker, table, etc. when you had complained to thoma about not bringing your lunch, later that day you’d open your locker to find a freshly made lunchbox. when you grumble to yourself about running out of correction tape, a pack with the plastic still on appears on your table. you’re perplexed, albeit grateful. after all, this isn’t the first time some creepy shit has happened to you.
⇢ he really really wishes he’d work up the courage to talk to you face to face without having to be so nervous… but he can’t help the jitters whenever you’re just in front of him! your voice has his ears ringing, your scent has him dizzy, and you’re just so, so cool that he feels so small compared to you! how could he ever talk to you like this…! maybe in the future, when mika would be more capable and dependable…
[ “a–aah… how could i talk to them! they’re too…!” ]
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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 5 months ago
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It’s Not A Big Deal
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV
Summary: Dean's in for a rude awakening when he finds out exactly what you did when you got stranded in another universe.
Tropes: Fluff, Frenemies (Dean and the Reader), Awkward Situation, Multiverse Problems.
Word Count: 3.1K (I promise I didn't mean for it to happen)
Warnings: I'm gonna label this 18+ just to be sure. There is some swearing (only a few times), Heated Kiss, Sexual Innuendo, References to Sex/Past Sex (it happens quite a bit). Soldier Boy being Soldier Boy (Everyone knows he’s a warning).
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!
Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person
Main Masterlist
A/N: Okay I know that I should be working on my other fics, but I had this idea after reading an INCREDIBLE fic by @justagirlinafandomworld called "Stranded" for @jacklesversebingo and I couldn't help myself.
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Sam squeals the car into the parking lot of the motel so loud that Dean and you can hear the high pitched scream of rubber on asphalt from your room on the second level.
"If he ruins those tires he's going to pay for them." Dean grumbles under his breath from where he sits at the small wooden table under the window, wiping down his gun with a clean rag. The sunlight that came streaming through dramatized the sharp angles of his jaw and the soft sleepy strands of his hair that still stuck up from when he woke up an hour ago.
"I don't know what his hurry is." You don’t look up from the worn paperback perched in your lap, gently turning the page. "If he's that eager to get back here to tell us something he should have just called."
“Maybe there was a sample sale on hair gel.” Dean laughs at his own joke and you can sense him look up from the gun to try and catch your eye, but you don't raise your gaze from the text.
“That’s pretty brave coming from someone who owns 90% of the products in that bathroom.”
“What? I do not-“
“Really? If I walk in there right now there won’t be seven different half-used deodorant sticks?”
“They’re different smells." Dean says defensively. "And shut up. I don’t comment on how many books you bring with you. Don’t know why you need to shove a million in your bag and then just buy one while you’re here.”
“Because I might not feel like reading the ones I bring. I might want to try something new. And this book,” You wave the book in your hand for emphasis. “Is very good and I don’t have it back at the bunker, and it was only two bucks!"
“But the others ones might be good too. You don’t know.” Dean sighs, looking at you like you're insane. "You just let them sit and rot in your suitcase."
Today was the last day that you would be staying in Louis, Illinois. The current case that the three of you had been working on together had been solved, which meant that the townsfolk were no longer dealing with a zombie outbreak and you were at peace to settle down on your pull out bed with a good book, taking a few moments for yourself.
You desperately needed at least five, but you also wished that you were already back in your room at the bunker.
The bed there didn't have as many springs that stuck into your back at odd angles and didn't squeak whenever you moved an inch. Your inability to find a comfortable position meant that the mattress squeaked all night long and Dean had thrown his pillow at you to make it stop. He hadn’t been pleased when you returned it back to him. Then again, you had hit him in the face with it as hard as you could when you did.
And like hell you were going to give Dean Winchester the satisfaction of sleeping in bed with him. You’d had to do that one time on a hunt where there were no extra rooms and Dean refused to let you sleep on the floor or in his car. He said that you might make it spontaneously combust.  So you'd shared the bed and learned that he was the biggest blanket hog you’d ever met, not to mention when you woke up he was spooning you and you couldn’t be certain, but you thought he had tried to cop a feel at least once.
If anything you’d maybe sleep in Sam’s bed, but the guy was so much bigger than you he took up most of the space, so you were stuck with the pull out couch.
You couldn't wait to be home. You liked going out on cases, but you liked that you had a home now, a space that was only yours, and someplace where you could shut yourself away from the world. And most importantly, away from Dean Winchester, who had been the bane of your existence since the night you met him for the first time.
Of course this wasn't too bad either. Taking a few moments of quiet for yourself while Dean cleaned his guns and sorted some of his tools in his duffle. The two of you were getting more comfortable around one another. When you’d first met there had been a lot of screaming and several "she's not going to be there is she?" and "what the hell is she doing here?" questions that Dean moaned to Sam over and over the more the three of you teamed up.
You weren't used to working with other people, well, now you were,  but before it had just been you and the endless road. But as it began to happen more and more you tried to fit comfortably into the swing of things. Dean and you would occasionally bump heads, but it happened less now than it did before. After five years you'd hoped that the two of you could be more civilized, for Sam's sake at least.
Sam and you got along much better. You didn't understand what Dean's problem was with you, or why he hated you so much. He was always correcting you, insulting you, and snatching things away from you as if you hadn't been hunting your entire life. Occasionally it wasn't that bad, like right now, but it had been much worse a few years ago.
When you'd met Dean you'd hated him, thought he was a dick, but the more the two of you spent time together on cases the more you saw that he did those things to hide what he was feeling and the more you saw how big his heart was.
You believed that your relationship now with him had progressed to a sort of symbiotic relationship, but honestly it was more like passive aggressive roommates who fight over whose turn it is to clean the dishes.
Dean still tended to get high and mighty sometimes and annoyed you without end, but you stuck around and in Sam's words "bickered like an old couple."
Sam had gone to grab some snacks and fill the tank at the gas station down the street twenty minutes ago, leaving with a joyful "Don't kill each other."
So far there were no casualties, but apart of you itched to beam Dean in the back of the head with the paperback just for a little bit of excitement.
Sam bursts into the room out of breath. "Okay I-"
"Where's the fire Sammy?" Dean sighs looking up from his gun.
"I ran into someone when I was at the gas station." Sam says it all together, as if it's one sentence.
"And?" You move your hand in a come on gesture hoping that Sam will get to the point.
"Well he's- he's-"
The man that pushes into the room past Sam is not Dean, he looks like him, but that's not why he's so familiar. He's muscular with dark brown hair that hangs a little longer than Dean's, over the top of his ears, while a few strands fall forward on his forehead. He's allowed a dark beard to cover his cheeks, but his eyes are the same piercing green that they were the last time you saw him. And if that wasn't enough for you to recognize him, the dark green superhero suit would be a dead giveaway.
Oh shit.
"Ben?" You drop your book onto the thick carpeted floor in surprise.
Two months ago you had been unwillingly transported to another reality, a reality where superheroes were real, people had powers, and where you met a version of Dean that you actually got along with better than the Dean in your reality.
You hadn't told Sam or Dean what happened between Ben and you. You weren't about to admit out loud that you actually got along with another version of Dean or admit that you found the other version of Dean aka Ben, attractive. So attractive in fact that you had spent a good amount of the time in the other universe in bed with him before you came back to your reality.
Ben doesn't respond, instead he crosses the room in several powerful strides, and hauls you up off the pull out couch.
"What are you-"
One of his hands tangles in the back of your hair, pulling your mouth against his in a furious kiss that steals your breath away and silences whatever you were going to say next. A part of you registers that Dean and Sam are still in the room, but it's quickly swept away by how it feels to kiss Ben. You hadn't forgotten him, anything but that. Sometimes you actually kind of missed him, when you were lonely or when the Dean from your universe annoyed you too much. Because Ben annoyed you too, but at least at the end of it there was a way to relieve the tension. With Dean the only place you put all your frustration was into the hunt and there were only so many times you could bash a Djinn’s head in.
Ben's tongue brushes against your bottom lip, begging for entrance, and you let him in, bringing your hands up to the back of his neck to thread into the long strands of his hair. The strands fall between your fingertips, feathering out from your grip. You moan softly into his mouth as he deepens the kiss, feeling the familiar scratch of his beard against your cheeks, and feel his hand begin to slip down your back to rest on the curve of your ass.
Well, he certainly hasn't changed.
"Fuck I missed you sweetheart." Ben murmurs against your mouth squeezing your butt to emphasize the point. "You and this sexy fucking body."
"Ben." You roll your eyes with a snort.
"What? You didn't miss me?" He raises an eyebrow, forcing his mouth into an attractive pout. "Because you certainly seemed happy to see me a second ago." His free hand gently traces your plump lower lip with the pad of your thumb.
"I did and I am happy to see you, but what are you doing here?"
"Thought so." Ben leans his head back down towards yours, ignoring your question as he tries to kiss you again, but before he can Dean interrupts.
"What the fuck is going on?" Dean shouts, standing from the table under the window, and points his gun at Ben's unprotected back. "Who the fuck are you?"
Ben half turns over his shoulder eyes flicking from the gun to Dean with a sigh. "Look the only thing that's gonna do is piss me off. And you don't want that kid."
Dean makes a face. "Who the hell are you calling kid?"
"Now why don't you two fuck off for a few hours, let me give her a proper hello." Ben turns his dark eyes back on you, cupping your chin in his large hand.
"Y/n? You want to tell us what's happening? Or who this guy is?" Sam asks, but you can't look away from Ben.
You really had missed him. Ben was even more attractive than you remembered. The day that you'd left his universe, Ben had asked you to stay, well, had asked you in his own way. He'd said that he wasn't done with you and if you had stayed he would have made it worth your while. But you had to come back. You weren’t sure how Dean and Sam would survive without you and also because the universe that Ben inhabited was more terrifying than yours, and that was saying something, given that you dealt with demons on a daily basis.
"Guys this is Ben." You clear your throat. "Ben this is Dean and Sam."
"Ben as in Soldier Boy? From the fucked up reality with the people with superpowers Ben?" Dean sputters. He lowered the gun slightly, but he's still looking from Ben to you like he's just walked in on his parents making out.
"Yes." You say it slowly, trying to find a way out, but there really isn't any way to hide this.
It's not that big a deal, is it?
Ben releases you and turns to look at Dean, eyes skating over his body. "So that's Dean?" He tilts his head to the side. "Kinda scrawny. The way you described him made me think he'd look a little more like a man and less like a fucking pussy."
"What the fuck did you just say to me?" Dean takes a step towards Ben, holding his gun steady out from his chest. You noticed that Dean did try to puff it out more after Ben's insult.
"You heard me." Ben smirks, welcoming the challenge.
"Whoa!" You step between them. "Calm down ladies there's enough Prada to go around at this sample sale."
Ben's eyes narrow in confusion at your comment, but he doesn't back down from Dean.
"I'd say that you left a few details out of your trip!" Dean shouts looking from Ben to you in disgust. "Did you sleep with me?"
"What?" You look at him like he’s crazy.
What does he mean?
"You, and him." Dean gestures wildly with the gun. "Did you sleep with me?"
"What are you talking about? No I didn't sleep with you, I slept with him and it was only once!" You shout back.
Ben clears his throat.
"Fine. A few times.” You correct with a sigh.
“But- you- him-“ Dean’s head turns from Ben to you. “Him- you-.”
“Yeah. Me and her fucked.” Ben says it slowly like Dean is a child.
Honestly he was acting a little bit like a child.
Sam is holding back his laughter behind a hand while Dean’s eye begins to twitch aggressively.
This is exactly why I didn’t tell him. They aren’t the same person! Dean is Dean and Ben is Ben. Someone who shares the same face. And probably the same other things that I’m not going to think about right now because that seems crazy.
"How many times is a few?” Dean demands.
"Why does that matter?”
"HOW MANY?" He shouts so loud that you think the people in the next room over were probably having a wonderful time listening to this soap opera.
Because it kinda did sound like one right? The main character never gets along with someone and then gets transported to another reality through a colorful portal and immediately clicks with another version of him. And-
Maybe I need to rethink my life.
"Well..." Your face scrunched up trying to count exactly how many times that you and Ben had sex. It was difficult. Not that it was hard to remember, you knew that you weren’t going to forget it anytime soon, but just the amount of times the two of you were together was more than you could count on your fingers.
"Well what? You were there for five days!"
"I mean..." You shrug.
“Why?” Dean groans pinching the bridge of his nose as if trying to scrub the images from his brain.
Honestly, if he’d told you that he had sex with another version of you, you probably would have had the same reaction, but you were not about to admit that to Dean Winchester of all people.
He’s not gonna win this argument. Especially not when he's waving his gun around like a psychopath.
“Because he's-“ You  glance over at Ben who winks at you. “I don’t know. He’s just kinda-.”
“Everything you’re not.” Ben raises his eyebrow at Dean.
“Sammy you gonna weigh in on this?” You look at Sam expectantly hoping that he can jolt Dean out of the never ending loop he seemed to be stuck in.
“Nope. I’m staying out of it.” Sam holds his hands up in surrender.
“I cannot believe you slept with me!” Dean shouts again.
“Stop saying that! I didn’t sleep with you! I slept with him. Can we please move on-“ You groan.
"Same thing!"
"What? How is it the same thing?” You plant your hands on your hips glaring at Dean.
"He's me from another universe!" Dean is gesturing wildly with his gun now. “How would you feel if I slept with an alternate version of you?”
“It’s completely different!”
“How?”
“They aren’t us!”
“He sure as hell looks like me!" Dean snaps back. "What did you close your eyes the whole time or something?"
Your cheeks flare bright red with Dean's question. "No I didn't!"
“And I don’t look like you.” Ben grunts crossing his arms over his chest and giving Dean a once over again.
“He also doesn’t act like you.” You add.
It was true, Ben didn’t. And for some reason you got along with him more. You didn’t understand what Dean’s problem was, but for the better part of five years he’d been treating you like you hadn’t been hunting your whole life. Not to mention the first three years were spent with Dean barely saying two words to you without some kind of insult attached.
“That’s beside the point!”
“How is that beside the point?” You demand.
“I can’t believe you did this!”
"I didn't kill anyone Dean. I didn't torture any babies or kill any puppies. We are consenting adults! We had sex-"
“No no no!” Dean puts his fingers in his ears. “Lalalalala.” He sings to himself to avoid the image.
"And we're gonna have it again. So the two of you should clear out, unless you're in to that kind of thing Deanie.” Ben wraps his arm around your shoulders to pull you into him, but you don’t take your eyes off of Dean.
“Fuck I’m gonna need so much therapy after this” Dean groans putting the gun down on the table. Which was a good sign because now you weren’t worried that he would accidentally shoot Sam in the foot.
“Really? After everything you’ve gone through that’s what pushes you over the edge?” You ask him in shock.
“Yes. Are you happy? You’ve driven me to the point of insanity!” Dean snaps.
"You're acting like a child."
"I am not! I am having a completely normal reaction to finding out you slept with Wannabe Captain America!” Dean gestures to all of Ben who looks at Dean like he can’t tell if it’s an insult or not. 
You take in a deep breath to calm your racing heart. “Why are you so upset that I slept with him Dean? I don’t understand how this is so earth shattering to you that two people had sex! You have sex with people all the time-“
“Not with you!”He snaps back, but then clears his throat when he realized what he just said.
“He is not YOU!” You shout rolling your eyes for the millionth time. At the rate he was going, you were sure they were going to roll out of your head. 
“As important as this conversation is… can we maybe put a pin in it and go back to why he’s here?” Sam asks diplomatically.
“No-“ Dean says at the same time you say.
“Yes! Ben why are you here?”
“Don’t really know.” He shrugs taking a long hit from a joint that seemed to materialize out of thin air, while tightening his arm over your shoulders. “All I know was that I was fighting Homelander and someone hit me from behind. Then I ended up here.” Ben’s eyes trace your body. “But I’m not complaining, especially not because I got to see you again doll.” He winks.
“Homelander?” Dean repeats. “That is the stupidest hero name I’ve ever heard in my entire life.”
“He’s anything but a hero.” You fight the shudder from the last time you ran in to him. “Think about Superman if Superman was a narcissistic sadist with a massive inferiority complex, no weakness, and an obsession with perfect hair.”
Dean looks Ben up and down with a heavy sigh. “I’m disappointed that I couldn’t have at least been a bit more like Batman.”
“Trust me. You don’t want to meet knockoff Batman from his reality either.” You respond.
"I guess I'll start doing some research." Sam says slowly, looking from Ben to you while hiding a smile.
He’s enjoying this way too much.
"Good." Dean frowns at Ben, before he claps him hard on the shoulder. You saw Dean fight the wince when he felt how solid Ben was. "Let's get you home buddy." His eyes dart from Ben to you. "Before you do anything else that'll scar me for life."
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Thank you so much for reading! Likes, Comments, and Reblogs are not required, but are always appreciated! 😊
Taglist: @roseblue373 @mrsjenniferwinchester
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myjelllybean · 6 months ago
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Who's the dad
This is a Evan Buckley (9-1-1) fanfiction I have finally decided to post. It is the first or second fanfiction I have written in my whole life so this is probably bad. English is not my first language so there could be a few mistakes.
I hope everyone who reads this enjoys it. If anyone has feedback, I am open for it.<3
Summary: A few months after a one-night stand leaves (Y/N) pregnant, she unexpectedly meets the baby's father at a BBQ at her dad's fire station.
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The blonde guy was hot, (Y/N) had to admit. His baby blue shirt lets his eyes glow in the most perfect way.
“So why are you here today?”, (Y/N) asked. They both had a silent deal: no name’s, no prying for information.
“Hard day at work”, the man answered. “You?”
“Hard week.” (Y/N) knew she was already drunk, but she ordered another tequila. In the afternoon, she brought her kids to their grandparents, Bobby and Athena. The reason she told them: I need the evening for drinking until I don’t even know my name anymore.
She knew drinking wasn’t going to solve her problem, but it would numb her for at least one night. It would make her forget the pain.
The man nodded, but she didn’t even know what she had said before.
They drank a few drinks together until both of them saw black spots dancing in front of their eyes.
(Y/N) knew it was wrong what she wanted to do know. She wanted to kiss this man. She wanted to forget why she was here tonight. She knew exactly how wrong it would be. How disappointed everyone would look at her. But screw it. She wanted him and she wanted him now.
She leant forward and pressed a kiss on his lips. It felt so right, but so wrong. It didn’t matter. The blonde deepened the kiss. The next thing (Y/N) knew was that they were in the man’s apartment. In his bed.
___
(Y/N) did her best to hide the baby bump – but it didn’t help much. Maybe she could tell everyone she has just eaten too much when they were in Europe. She hasn’t seen anyone of her family in the last 5 months. They didn’t know she was pregnant and they are not supposed to. Half a year ago she packed her stuff and drove away with the kids.
After her husband died and she slept with this stranger, she had to leave. She wasn’t able to stay anymore. She was ashamed of herself. How was she able to sleep with someone just some hours after Henry died? They weren’t always happy but she loved him. He had been her world. Until he was gone.
“Mommy? How much longer we have to drive?” James asked from the back of the car. He was the most impatient of her kids.
“Only around half an hour then you can finally see grandpa and grandma again.”
(Y/N) heard a sigh from her son and chuckled.
“Is there going to be cake? Is grandpa going to make pasta for us?” Cameron. She and James are twins and couldn’t be more similar. Both impatient and always hungry until they ate two bites and complain about being too full to eat any more.
“I don’t know. I have never been to a party at the station.” Nobody knew they were going to come. It was going to be a surprise.
Suddenly, Emily began to cry in her seat. The two-year old always slept in the car, but when she woke up, she always had a shock and started to cry when she noticed they were driving.
“Liv, can you please give Emily her pacifier?” The 14-year-old didn’t seem to hear her mom, as she had her headphones in her ears and scrolled through TikTok’s.
“Liv! Give your sister her damn pacifier!” Finally.
After two weeks in Europe, (Y/N) was already super annoyed. She tried to keep it cool, but it wasn’t easy to be with four kids and pregnant when she didn’t have her husband around.
___
Just a few minutes later, (Y/N) parked in front of the firehouse. She had been here before. Not inside it but she had dropped off her father a few times when his car was at the car repair.
“Ok! We are here! All out of the car!” (Y/N) picked up her youngest and followed the rest of the kids inside the firehouse.
She didn’t see many people downstairs, but around 50 people were upstairs.
“(Y/N)? Hey! You’re back! Where were you in the last few months? We tried to call you but you didn’t answer. We were so worried!” Bobby literally ran to her and hugged her as tightly as possible with Emily between them. “She grew up so much”, he said, reaching out to stroke Emily’s back.
“Yes. She absolutely did.” (Y/N) could see the worried and exhausted expression on her father’s face and immediately felt sorry for not even writing him and Athena a message that she and the kids were ok.
“May I introduce you to the team?”, Bobby asked after hugging the twins and Liv, who finally put away her headphones.
The 118’s Captain led his family to a bunch of people in uniforms.
“These guys are Eddie, Chimney, Hen and Buck.” (Y/N)’s breath caught in her throat. Fuck. The super-hot guy stood in front of her. With his uniform he looked even better that in his baby blue shirt he wore the last time. Why the fuck did she still remember what this guy had worn when they met in the bar?!
“Meet (Y/N), Liv, James, Cameron and Emily.”
“Hey! Nice to meet y’all”, (Y/N) said overly friendly, trying to hide the surprise, as well as Buck did.
“Grandpa? You have cake?”, Cameron asked Bobby.
“Of course. A party without cake isn’t a party. Come on, I’ll show you all.” Bobby led the kids away from (Y/N) and the team, over to the kitchen island on which many plates of cake were standing.
“’So… you are Cap’s daughter?”, a brown-haired man asked, who (Y/N) remembered as Eddie.
“Yepp, that’s me.” (Y/N) looked at Buck who looked just as surprised, as she felt.
“So, you are Buck?”, she asked him just as a try to build a conversation. She tugged gently on her shirt, as she didn’t want Buck to notice her baby bump.
“Uhm… yes. I am. Evan Buckley. So… these are your kids? You look quite young”, Buck asked and (Y/N) furrowed her brow until she realized, they haven’t talked about ages when they spent the night together. She was quite young for already having 4 kids. She had Liv when she was 16, but she barely told people, as she always got these judging looks.
“Yes, they are.” (Y/N) stared at the ground, unable to hold eye contact with the man she had a breathtaking night.
“Father’s not in the picture?”, Eddie asked and (Y/N) could see that Buck was relieved, that his friend asked the question, so he didn’t seem too suspicious.
“Um, no. He died 5 months ago. Car accident.” Instead of staring at the ground, (Y/N) now looked at the ceiling, trying to stop the tears, which always threatened to flow freely, whenever she talked about her late husband.
When she finally managed to make eye contact with Evan, she could see pain written over his face. Her husband died 5 months ago, around the same time, she slept with him. Had he been some kind of replacement? He knew they agreed to one night – no personal information, but it still hurt to know she didn’t actually feel the tiniest bit. She only had tried to compensate everything.
---
Around 3 hours later, in which the 118 got a small call once but came back after only one and a half hour, they all sat at the big table, because it was dinner time. Most of the time, (Y/N) stood on the sidelines, as she didn’t really feel comfortable around all these people she barely knew, and Buck. Nobody seemed to have noticed the baby bump which was covered under her shirt.
And now, (Y/N) even felt nauseous and had cramps in her lower belly. Her other pregnancies had gone quite well, except the last few months with the twins, but this pregnancy was terrible. She already had to go to hospital 4 times in the last 5 months, as she couldn’t keep anything down and had been severely dehydrated.
After only 2 bites, (Y/N) had to lay down the fork because she felt like she would throw up right away if she ate only one more bite. She had already thrown up breakfast and everything she drank today. She was lucky no one noticed she hasn’t eaten a piece of cake before.  
“Are you ok?”, the brown-haired man from before asked. Eddie? (Y/N) has always been terrible with names and couldn’t remember any. It took her 2 weeks to even remember Henry’s name after she met him, something he also made fun of, even years later.
“Uh yes. Just not feeling too great today”, she answered, trying to suppress the feeling to be sick. Her throat felt tight and her stomach felt like it was twisting and turning. The cramps were still present. She knew she wasn’t having a miscarriage as she once had one, and it felt different. The symptoms were pretty much the same, but she had another feeling. She had felt like something was missing, but this here wasn’t any better.
“You sure? You don’t look too good and you haven’t eaten much. Don’t you like the food?”, her father intervened now.
“The food’s great. Really. I haven’t been feeling my best today, that’s it.”
“Do you want one of the medics to take a look at you?” Bobby really seemed worried, but his daughter waved him off.
“Dad. Don’t make more out of it than it is.” Her dad made an acknowledging sound and (Y/N) thanked him silently with a small nod.
(Y/N) fidgeted with her hands, a nervous habit, she always did when she felt uncomfortable. Today, this many people were too much. She has never liked being around many people for a long time. She felt like everyone was staring at her and making fun off her or thinking of her as a disappointment when she did something wrong. Her kids were different, except of Liv. Liv came after her mom in these things, while the others luckily came after their dad and were the most social persons in this world.
Everyone looked at (Y/N), as she suddenly stood up, because a wave of nausea waved over her. As fast as possible she went to the restrooms, but only made it to the sink, where she threw up the bit of water she had managed to drink before. She rinsed her mouth and looked in the mirror. She looked like shit. Her skin was pale and her lips dry.
The door opened, and a woman stepped inside. She was around as tall as (Y/N) was and wore a wine-red shirt, that showed she worked at the 911 dispatch center. Had she been at the dinner table before? Or has (Y/N) just not seen her?
“Oh hey. Sorry. Just needed a break from out there. Who are you? I have never seen you here before. I am Maddie by the way. Chimney’s fiancé, Buck’s sister.”
(Y/N) raised an eyebrow. Buck’s sister?
“(Y/N). Bobby’s daughter. Nice to meet you.”
“Are you okay? You don’t look too well.” Again, this question. No, she wasn’t ok. But she didn’t say anything, so everyone should stop asking her. If she wanted someone to know she wasn’t well, she would tell.
“It’s okay. Just not feeling my best today.” Maddie nodded.
“Ok.” She didn’t pry further to get information, what (Y/N) was very thankful for.
“Soo. You are Bobby’s daughter? Athena has never mentioned, that Bobby has a daughter. She usually talks about everything.” Maddie furrowed her brow.
(Y/N) shrugged her shoulders.
“He doesn’t like talking about his private life too much.”
(Y/N) went back to the table, after she was sure she wouldn’t have to throw up again. But when she arrived at the dinner table again, she felt she was dizzy. Congratulations. First, she was sick and now she was dizzy because she didn’t drink or eat enough today.
She caught Bobby’s concerned gaze as he was looking at her, before everything went black.
___
“Heyyy! Here we go. You with us again?” She felt something painful on her chest and after a few moments she realized it was someone performing sternal rub to bring her back around. (Y/N) grumbled something.
When she tried to sit up again, there was a firm hand on her shoulder that kept her laid down.
“Damn, let me sit up if I want to. I am fine.” But (Y/N) noticed on her own how hoarse she sounded from being sick.
The hand suddenly disappeared from her shoulder, but when (Y/N) sat up, the hand was back at her back to steady her and kept her from falling over. Finally, she managed to open her eyes and caught look on the brown-haired man – Eddie. Evan sat directly next to her.
“We are just going to check a few things, ok?” All (Y/N) did, was giving an acknowledging sound from her.
The next thing she felt was a pulse-oximeter being slipped on her index finger and a blood pressure cuff on the other arm. She winced when Eddie inflated it and it squeezed tightly around her arm, which made her eyes well up with tears.
She had never liked the BP reading. When she was a kid, she cried freely as it made her arm feel like needles were jabbing it.
“Sorry.” Eddie was quick to deflate the cuff again after noticing the tears in (Y/N)’s eyes but she just shook her head to show everything’s ok. “BP’s 108/70. We are going to give you something to raise it again.”
“No! Wait!” (Y/N) frantically said. “I… I…” She made a sign for Eddie to come near to her so she could whisper into his ear without anyone hearing it. “I am pregnant but no one can know yet. I didn’t tell anyone.”
“Okayyy… I think we should go somewhere more private.” (Y/N) nodded agreeing.
Despite the other’s confused looks, they made their way to the locker room. Once they were there, Eddie began talking again.
“Has this happened before?”
“Yes, I already was in hospital because of it but it is just this morning sickness. I can’t keep anything down and it makes me dehydrated.” When (Y/N) looked to her right, she could see Buck looking at them but he couldn’t hear anything, right? He wasn’t as near and it was quite loud upstairs.
“Mhm. I want to hook you up on an IV if that’s ok with you? I don’t want you to be as dehydrated as you are now and I figure you don’t want a trip to the ER?”
“Yes, if that is possible, please.”
Only a few seconds later, (Y/N) could see her dad storming into the locker room.
“Sweetheart, what happened?” He looked kind of mad but also worried.
“Ehm… It is complica…”
“She is dehydrated because she didn’t drink or eat enough. She just wants to be alone for a moment and I can give her an IV,” Eddie intervened. (Y/N) shot him a thankful gaze and a tiny smile. She liked Eddie. He was really kind. She couldn’t think of any of her friends, who would do that for her.
“Mhm. Ok. I am going to call Athena. She said she would be here earlier. I’ll come back later.”
Bobby disappeared as fast as he came into the room.
“Thanks. For not telling him.” Eddie smiled at her.
“It’s not on me. And I think there are going to be better circumstances for that talk. How far are you?”
“5 months.”
“Ah. May I ask…”, he hesitated for a moment. “Is it your late husband’s baby?”
“No.” You didn’t know for sure why you told him, but he kind of let you feel calm and safe. “We didn’t… you know… the time before he died. We argued a lot. Had a one-night stand just a few hours after he died.”
“You know the father? Were you able to call and tell him?” Eddie looked honestly interested while he put an IV bag out of the medkit.
(Y/N) shook her head before nodding.
“I haven’t seen him… until today.” Eddie looked shocked and raised his eyebrows.
“Today? Is he here? At the station?”
(Y/N) nodded guiltily and looked at the ground when she heard Eddie chuckle.
“Damn, tell me more. Who is it?”
“Buck.”
“Buck?” The firefighter looked even more shocked than before and you nodded again.
“I didn’t know his name we agreed to ‘no personal information’. Why would I know he worked at my dad’s workplace? God… when he will find out he is going to be so pissed.” Eddie shook his head.
“Nah, I don’t think so. He will understand. And hey. You don’t have to defend yourself.” She smiled at his kindness.
She watched as Eddie swabbed the alcohol pad over the back of her hand.
“I would recommend to close your eyes if you are not good with needles”, he suggested. But (Y/N) couldn’t. She needed to see what Eddie was doing, even though she wasn’t good with needles. When the firefighter pushed the needle in the back of her hand, she let out a small squeal.
“Told you to keep your eyes closed but you refused to listen.” She heard Eddie chuckle. “Do you have any other symptoms I should be worried about?”
“I have cramps”, she admitted.
“Lower belly?” (Y/N) nodded. Why couldn’t she just have been home. She would lie on the couch and relax, but instead she was here, being poked and prodded by a firefighter.
“Can I take a look?” She nodded again. Eddie pulled her shirt over her abdomen and pressed his palm on different spots. (Y/N) looked upstairs, and froze. Fuck. She forgot that Evan was still standing upstairs, looking at the locker room. Looking at her.
Her eyes widened. Why had she agreed to this? Why didn’t she insist on being ok and went home? Why was she so stupid? She wanted to slap herself for not thinking.
Eddie seemed to notice her sudden panic, the pulse-oximeter, which was still clipped to her finger, chirped in high pitched noises.
“Hey, hey. Look at me. Deep breaths. What’s up?”
“B… Buck.” The firefighter looked where she was pointing at and sucked in a deep breath.
“Ok. That’s ok. We’ll fix that, after we are finished here, ok? It’ll be ok. Don’t worry. Try to breathe with me, the baby won’t like you breathing like that.” Demonstrative, Eddie took some deep breaths. “Do you know the gender yet?”
(Y/N) could tell that Eddie was only trying to distract her but she played along.
“A… girl. It’s a girl. Again.” She laughed. Her breathing became slower, steadier.
“That’s great. You already told your kids?”
“Mhm.”
“How did they react? Are they happy?” Eddie grinned at her.
“Y… yes. They are. James was a bit d- disappointed at first. H- he hoped he would finally get a brother t- to play soccer with.” (Y/N) smiled. “But the g- girls were all over t-the moon.”
The brown-haired man, put an oxygen mask over her face, which she tried to pull off, but his hand was immediately back, to hold the mask in place.
“Let it on, please”, he said with a look at the pulse-oximeter which was still chirping. “It’ll make it easier to breathe for you.
(Y/N) nodded, even though she hated the feeling of the mask, which made her feel the opposite of ‘easier to breathe’.
“Can I have a listen to the baby’s heartbeat?” After he had seen (Y/N) nodded again, he took the stethoscope and pressed the diaphragm to her belly.
“Looks good so far. The heartbeat is a bit fast for my liking but it’s nothing too concerning, just take some deep breaths, ok?”
“Copy, Firefighter Diaz.” (Y/N) took some deep breaths.
Just a few seconds later, someone stormed into the locker room. Buck.
“You… you are pregnant?” Buck hoped that (Y/N) would tell him it wasn’t his. That it was her husband’s.
“Yes.” She was surprised that her voice didn’t sound as high and panicking as she thought it would. She was scared. Scared of Buck’s reaction, which became even more clear, as the pulse-oximeter started to chirp frantically again.
Eddie took a look and was surprised how high the shown numbers were.
“Deep breaths”, he commanded her. But she couldn’t.
“Who’s the dad? Is it mine? Or is there a tiny chance, that it is your husband’s?” Even though (Y/N) thought something like that would come out of Buck’s mouth, she felt disappointment deep in her. She hoped he would not sound as panicked as he was now.
“Your’s.” (Y/N) fell silent, holding her breath in anticipation of what Evan would say now.
“Oh… wow. I have to admit that is a shock. Why… why didn’t you tell me? I could have been there with you.”
“I didn’t have your number, your address, your workplace. Not even your name! I didn’t even know if you lived in LA or somewhere else! What should I have done?”
Eddie put the oxygen mask over her mouth and nose, that she just put off again, but she immediately put it back to the floor. She didn’t want to breathe in the oxygen. It made her feel lightheaded and nauseous and gave her a headache.
“(Y/N)! Damn, breathe properly now the baby’s not comfortable anymore. Buck, I think you should go now and let her breathe a bit without the stress, this conversation puts on her.”
“No, he won’t go now! Not until this conversation is finished!” (Y/N) glared at Eddie. She wasn’t sure if that were the pregnancy hormones speaking out of her which have made her a bit temperamental these last few months.
“What do you want to do now? Buck? Do you have a girlfriend? Do you want to be a part in the baby’s life? Do you want to be part in MY life? I need to know it.” She could feel tears welling up in her eyes. Definitely the hormones which made her act strange at the moment.
“I don’t know exactly what I want to do now. But I don’t have a girlfriend. And I want to be part of the baby’s life. I want to be their father…”
“Her. It’s a girlie. Again.” (Y/N) could see Evan smiling a bit.
“Ok. I want to be HER father and spend time with her. And I think I would like to try to go on a date… with you. If you think you are ready. I liked you the last time we met, even though that could be because I had been really drunk that night.” Buck laughed and blushed a bit.
“I think… I think we can give it a try. I don’t know if I am ready for everything. But I do know I am ready for something. And maybe that could be with you.”
“Ok… uhm… great. And now you should really try to breathe properly with that mask. I know it’s not great, but even I can recognize how high your vitals are.”
She did as she was told. (Y/N) knew she liked Buck. He was cute. She wouldn’t have imagined to see a man like him blushing when talking about a baby and dating.
“I’m nauseous.” Eddie and Buck both looked a bit worried.
“Deep breaths. I think it’s just the IV and oxygen. I put some meds in the IV that should help with the belly cramps, that could make you feel nauseous.”
(Y/N) only nodded. She suddenly felt exhausted. The adrenaline of the day started to wear of.
“I think I’m gonna drive the kids home and we are going to relax a bit while watching some tv. Thank you for everything.”
“Wait. Stop. I won’t let you drive home alone. You don’t feel good and I wouldn’t like to know you don’t have anyone with you except you kids.” She nodded again. Evan was right. It would be stupid to not have anyone around her.
“I can come with you. Just if that’s ok with you.”
“Yes. That would be great. Thanks.”
“No problem. Shall we take your car?”
“Mhm.” She was thankful. She could really imagine Buck as a boyfriend. He is great.
---
“That doesn’t make any sense.” Evan laughed. He, (Y/N) and Liv were sat on the couch, watching a firefighter show, (Y/N) and Liv had been addicted to in the last few weeks.
“It doesn’t matter! This show is great!” Liv and Evan discussed about the mistakes in the show since around 10 minutes and it made (Y/N) smile. It was like a real family. Even though it hurt her a bit that it wasn’t Henry, sitting here. But let’s be honest: Henry would have never watched a show like that.
“That doesn’t change the fact, that you don’t use the saw like that. It’s just not safe!”
“Then just do not pay attention to the details.” Now, it was Liv laughing. (Y/N) hasn’t seen her daughter that happy in the last few months. She tried to cover up her emotions but it didn’t work completely. Her eyes started to burn and she felt a pressure building up. No, she wasn’t going to cry. Not in front of Evan. Her daughter. No.
“I’ll go to toilet for a moment.” She hoped nobody would notice she was about to cry, but her voice gave it away. She sounded hoarse and her voice broke at some point.
She locked the bathroom door and sank down to the cold floor, where she curled up, leaning her back on the even colder wall. Her hand was rubbing circles over her swollen belly. Damn it.
(Y/N) knew she missed Henry. She knew her kids have missed him every second since his death. But she was scared. Scared that moving on with Evan would make her forget her late husband. She heard a gentle knock on the wooden bathroom door.
“May I come in?” Buck.
“Ok.” Her voice sounded hoarse. She attempted to brush the tears away but it really didn’t work. Her eyes were still read, as well as her cheeks.
She got up to unlock the door, for Buck to come in. After he stepped inside the room, he closed the door again. He sat down next to her, and (Y/N) leaned her head on his shoulder.
“What’s up?”, he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Nothing.” Evan shot her a look, that said more than a thousand words.
“This honestly doesn’t look like nothing.”
“I don’t want to forget Henry. And I am scared. I have never had a relationship before him. And I still have cramps. And I still don’t feel too good in general. And I am scared of giving birth alone. And I am scared of everything else in my life.” Buck looked at her with a concerned expression and immediately pulled her into a hug as (Y/N) began to cry again.
“Ok. So, we first go to hospital, because these cramps make me worried, and then we can figure everything else out, ok?” He pressed a sloppy kiss on (Y/N)’s forehead, and she nodded.
“Mhm. But you need to help me get up, the baby is in the way.”
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