#and when i am called to quit this life

[ranna-alga]

"Do the Evolution" - Pearl Jam

[mars-ipan]

Hi, it's me again. I decided to follow your advice and try to seek out your 'actually serious' analysis, which led me to your komahina bible, the most easy to find compilation of this supposed analysis. Here are my thoughts-

1) Overview

- Most of this 'analysis' isn't analysis but a summary/overview of the game. It's not so much a 'bible' as a children's book summary of the bible, which at that point it would be better to play the actual game itself. It's clear it was made for a presentation on the 'uninitiated' if you will, but if that's the case, you shouldn't be advertising it as the literal bible on the subject.

- When you are not regurgitating points from the game beat by beat, the screen is halfway filled with either manga panels or fanart. My gripes with manga panels are, that even though they do depict the events of the game, the way they can be depicted by the artist can be pretty subjective due to the freedom of the medium in comparison to sprites, and that the role of one character can differ depending on whose pov manga it is (chiaki vs nagito). Fan art therefore should be scrutinized even more since it fully depicts abstracted and even the fandomified version of events, leading to situations where it's either unclear what is actually happening or betrays your more shallow view of the characters (i talk abt this later.)

- When you do use pictures directly from the game it's either a possible screenshot from a memorable moment or dialog from the wiki, limited almost exclusively to the freetime events. This leads me to believe that you haven't actually played the game(there are other factors hinting towards this) or watched a Let's Play of it, but going off of merely information that's already widely known and circulating within the fandom, and easy to search on the wiki.

2) Incorrect/Questionable information

Here I'll compile a lot of information that's either plainly wrong or baffling to having come to that conclusion , leading more credence to the theory that you either haven't actually played the game or your memory of it isnt as good as you think.

-"if Nagito's plan went off of without a hitch, he would have killed anyone that was closes to him at the time" plainly wrong. Komaeda's goal from the start was to make himself the victim, so by dying this way his death could have meaning and help the others. For somebody that keeps talking about Komaeda's "Martyr complex" this is truly a weird take to have.

-"Nagito...got the nurse for sure sick" is there any proof that specifically points to Komaeda for this? I believe the takeaway should've been that Mikan got sick because she was around all of them AND she overworked herself trying to take care of them. Is this just an awkwardly phrased attempt to make more of a connection between Tsumiki and Komaeda? I don't think you needed more than the ones that already existed.

- "he helps Junko brainwash a bunch of students" Kamukura at neither point in the anime or Danganronpa 0 was ever specifically implicated in the brainwashing. He never 'helps' Junko, especially in that way. If you meant, participates in the student council killing game, you should've said that, but even then his agency and influence is limited.

-"they found the Remnants and captured them!"...no, they didn't. The Remnants presented themselves as survivors and the Foundation took them in. They handed themselves over willingly. It was a pretty big piece of the final part of the game...

3) Komaeda and Komahina

- "Nagito's habit of putting people on pedestals" Where. Sure, he certainly parrots the belief that the "Ultimates" as a unit are at the top of the food chain and should be prioritised, but its clear that doesn't exactly carry over to his classmates like teruteru, Kuzuryu and even Souda sometimes. Just because of a few positive comments refering to them as Ultimates and the trial which he literally breaks down in, this is a hard position to support.

-"Nagito manipulates Hajime into playing the game" How. He literally just told him to play it. How is that manipulation. Also, isn't it a bit unfair to put the blame on Koizumi's death to him as well? I think they were multiple factors playing into this, but sure, how else are you gonna convince people that Komaeda is a twisted fucking cyclepath that loves leading people to their deaths.

-The way that you say the Kuzuryu/Pekoyama relationship mirrors Komahina as 'I will give up my agency for you/ I just want you' is also confusing. Unless of course you mirror Peko's struggle with her agency and harmful beliefs the clan enforced on her with Komaeda's own belief system, in which case, idk man, i feel like you are giving a bit too much credit to the supposed severity of Komaeda's views and trying too hard to make Hinata the 'rational' and 'grounding' one in the relationship.

- Again, the amount of times you refer to Komaeda as a freak for doing something 'weird' or even being drawn weirdly doing it , mostly in the manga, makes me belief this isn't just an affectionate tongue in cheek joke as you claim, but an actual way in which your interpretation of Komaeda is colored.

-"it doesn't excuse his nonchalance towards tragedy and murder but explains it" what needs to be excused here exactly? Komaeda doesn't need to immediately bawl his eyes out when someone gets killed or else he's suspicious and...bad? I am confused with what you mean by this. If you mean that Komeada shouldn't be so nonchalant about murder because he's constantly trying to kill someone else, that is plainly incorrect and i explained above why.

-Posturing about Komaeda's 'black and white thinking' while in the next exact slide you show fanart of him smugly explaining he has Borderline. First, i want you to explain to me the black and white thinking in a way that isn't "oh, the friends and classmates i previously liked turned out to be fucking terrorists". I think that's a pretty justifiable situation for your thinking to go from white to black. Also, if that is enough credence to assign Komaeda BPD, you really don't know how BPD works, especially since you assigned it to the one character you constantly talk about being a freak (and also lust...pseudo lust? after).

- The insistence with Hinata not really understanding Komaeda and running away, even if he wants to understands him is pretty suspect, especially when compared to the game. Hinata is confused and overwhelmed yes, but it's not just that he wants to understand Komaeda but that he still feels fondness for him, he still follows his advice and puts his faith in him and the way he mourns him in Chapter 5 is also pretty indicative of this. It's just another part in the pattern in you making Hinata the confused, rational, 'morally pure' man that's 'tempted' by 'corrupted' manic pixie mentally ill demon Komaeda. Something tells me your priest AU isn't so much playing with dolls as much as...what you actually believe these characters dynamic is.

- The whole page where Servant is basically made into a joke about how hot and sexy and freaky he is doesn't help your point either.

-The most damning evidence of course is a drawing in the second to last slide, wherein Komaeda is supposed to be analogous to 'guy who has something wrong with him' (distorted, freak, mentally ill) and Hinata is analogous to the guy that 'is the only one that understands them' (the rational one, the relationship of understanding doesn't go both ways).

- Your slide with sources is pretty vague and unclear. Also the way that you credit "Your superior mind" before the game itself when all you've been doing is repeating and misinterpreting the plot of the game is ...ironic

So yeah, that's all I got. Feel free to 'debunk' my observations as much as you please, I just want to know if there's actual basis behind everything you just said or I should go digging for 'the actual serious analysis' yet again.

i think you forgot that fandom is meant to be fun

[shannonsketches]

like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime

why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?

it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working

Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!

[timemachineyeah]

the fact that I cannot simply quit my job. there’s plenty of food and space and skilled people in the world. things could function so much better with a tenth the labor if we were efficient about it. but we aren’t. and under capitalism I love my job - I am incredibly lucky to have it and even find it fulfilling in its way. but also I am disabled and my life would be 1000% easier if I just didn’t have to find miracle jobs to make what still comes to below poverty wages given how few hours I can manage. but even though the amount of money I make is play money to other people, it’s the only thing giving me dignity, both the dignity of privacy in spending and the false dignity of being a “productive member of society”. plus, like, I gotta eat and feed my cats, even if I’m currently rent free. but sometimes I think about the ways money and my job (and their relationship with my health) play as such large factors in my decision making and I just think, ideally, those would have less weight. ideally I could just quit my job and somehow still have money. not because I don’t love the work, but because of the limitations having to maintain both a work schedule and my fatigue put on me.

[shrews-things]

Yesterday my little brother called because a stranger, a worker at a bakery told him that he really reminded her of a friend and that he's nearly identical to this friend she has, and said my name. Turns out she's the lady from the secondhand book cart I used to live next to and befriended her while walking by nearly every day, but then I moved and she switched jobs and I haven't seen her in months and I've been wondering how she's doing every time I shopped at a book cart and apparently she remembers my name too and thinks of me as a dear friend. Idk it just made me happy and I feel like there's a poem to write here but I'm not very good with words

[lupismaris]

..

[buttercup-barf]

Under the cut are mostly self-insert doodles of decreasing quality. Again, not much directly tied to Team Fortress 2. Might as well toss these out while I have no access to my puter. Much yapping under the cut and in the tags incoming.

Another self-insert, this time less of a "here's me as a tenth class" and more of a "here's my game experiences translated into the class I would take the place of". The Cleaner. Although I guess they could still be wearing either suit. It doesn't matter that much.

That one Convict's Case taunt with Backup would be extremely funny, because the man would be on the verge of a breakdown (he does not want to go to jail so bad you have no idea). The second image- I owe no explanation. You know what I am. You see the pattern with my favourites.

The duality of the man. Resting face versus "just heard you express interest in religion/Russian folklore" face. He's not that hard to make friends with, when you pull him away from all the explosions.

Some doodles of trying to figure his face out. Unfortunately, the more I stare at him, the more I worry that he looks like A Certain Guy With The Last Name "Kazarin", and the fear of never being original in my life caught up to me.

Don't look at me, don't perceive me, I refuse to explain any of my actions to you.

[an-inky-fingered-lass]

i still have SO many feelings about the may & robin storyline, and just robin in general, honestly. like, i will seriously try and write a coherent thing about this at some point, but just. awestruck feels of the Soft Variety. it’s just- things brought full circle in the most gorgeous way. it’s a such a kind story, and it’s one of the most special to me in anything ever, i think. may has lost all hope so many times in so many ways. but she’s spent building so much time building herself back from so many personal ends, and when everything ends she becomes the person who keeps hope. she from not wanting hope she becomes the person that carries that hope for everyone.

robin is so young and has lived through so little and at once so much. more than anyone can fathom. she sees death and destruction behind her eyes all the time but that also makes the only person who sees the possibility of hope, the possibility of something that seems inevitable going differently. a chance for a better world, a better future. and it’s may who takes her in, takes care of her - in so many ways robin represents everything may never thought she could have, could be ever again: a mother. someone who could nurture, protect, love, hope. a source of comfort. unafraid.

You weren’t afraid of what I could do.

may knows what it is to have a hell inside your head. to find a way out, to find the hope, the light. it’s not the same thing, but it IS. robin knew, all her days, that she was safe. may believed in her. may was herself- everything she was, everything her life had made her, and that meant someone who made a little girl feel safe. that meant someone who never gave up hope. she lost so much and she loved even harder and because of THAT- because she believed in a little girl who saw a better world- because of that the world was saved.

AGH.

their exchange in the flashback is one of my favorite bits of dialogue.

may: you tell me your vision of us saving the world.

robin: but I’ve never seen that vision.

may: you will.

i’ve been feeling like I need a break from writing may lately, and have simultaneously been having kind of a hard time with that (in all fairness, i’ve written two frickin novels’ worth of her over the past almost two years and little else… this relates to both points). so. working on giving myself less of a hard time about, um, most things really, but especially ebbing and flowing inspiration. but i really really want to write something for them someday. this story is so, so special to me.

[permanentreverie]

since zero (0) people asked, here’s what my immediate tbr is!

the wake-up call by beth o’leary

eleanor oliphant is completely fine by gail honeyman

the road trip by beth o’leary

the seven year slip by ashley poston

red white & royal blue by casey mcquinston (reread)

[squeeb-art]

This meme except I get to choose the characters to smash my art block. Fun game, tell me what you think what I’m like (for better or for worse) based on these guys.

Friend-endorsed: "I don't know nausicaa or roxy but the rest are very accurate i think"

[mars-ipan]

i do love my family very dearly but the internalized ableism the men in here struggle with is. so much

[mooifyourecows]

Have you considered looking into work-from-home jobs? I’m not sure what field you’d be looking into, but that might reduce some of the anxiety of the process. A zoom interview might be required, but you could probably see if you could do camera-off.

Based on research I’ve done in the past, script-writing and editing jobs can often be done remotely! You do have to be wary of fake offers, but those are often the ones that seem too good to be true. You’re intelligent, so you can probably spot those easily.

Regardless, take a deep breath and remind yourself: if they don’t want to hire you, it wasn’t meant to be in the first place. Work on solidifying your resume and building your portfolio. You already have lots of pre-written material you could use as references!

I hope this isn’t too much coming from a stranger, but we’re all rooting for you!

Yeahhh... tbh I don't really have much of a resume. I had one soul sucking retail job about ten years ago that my uncle helped me get on account of me being the equivalent of the world's most pathetic-est sopping wet beast in interviews 🥲 and I wound up getting fired in the end for having the audacity to call in sick 4 times a year instead of 3! I know, I know, I'm horrible and lazy and undeserving of the 8$ an hour they were paying me to lift heavy boxes and deal with rude middle aged women 9 hours a day 😮‍💨

I'm kinda wary about getting a job doing any sort of writing since writing is what I like to do for fun and relaxation. If it turned into a soul sucking activity for me I'd be pretty boned. Getting donations to write chapters is different because I'm getting money to write what I love and want to write anyway, but I don't want to start associating my favorite thing with work, ya know?

I know that kinda limits my options though. Especially since I ain't got no skills that could be used remotely beyond that. I'd love to have a part time retail job that I could just show up a couple times a week, do some menial tasks for a few hours with minimal human interaction, and then go home. That's my ideal job. But the only jobs available near me are full time or have requirements I do not meet.

I know, excuses, excuses! But I'll survive. I might have to sell a kidney but I'm sure I'll live (jkjk things aren't that dire, I promise)

Thanks for the advice though! It's been a really long time since I've had to work and the prospect is terrifying but with any luck it won't literally kill me 🤞

[yoshistory]

part of me still feels like i might be sort of genderfluid and/or bisexual but just traumatized about it. no idea anymore

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

[technicolorxsn]

hm

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

also what is wrong with me that when people try and be gentle-sympathetic when i'm in grumpy pain overwhelm shutdown mode i just want to hit something

"are you okay? ❤" no i'm filled with murderous rage, stop being soft-nice to me before i break something