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quillyfied · 7 months ago

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Hellaverse Theories: Hazbin Hotel S1E8

Welcome to Quilly’s Hellaverse Theories, where I overthink the entire Hellaverse! Last episode of Hazbin time, and after this I’ll start on Helluva Boss (which shouldn’t be nearly as long but I am a windbag so who knows). Let’s go!!

Hazbin Hotel s1e8, here we go:

And here we go again with Vox and his complete reasonable obsession with Alastor and anyone who associates with him, love that for Vox, truly. Best life: he’s living it. But it’s also kinda scary how comprehensive a view Vox has of everyone and everything; we know this already, but watching him watching the Hotel just sort of feels…more violating. Because of audience bonding with the characters, really, but still. There’s a reason why the Vees are a terrifying force to be reckoned with and its real-world reflections make me too sad and full of impotent rage to manage so let’s move on.

Charlie wishing her mom could see this! Sweet! Valid! Somehow super sad knowing where her mom is but not knowing why!!

Well. Vaggie straight-up calls them all “sinners.” So for me that pretty handily puts the “are cannibals sinners” debate to bed. For a while, at least; I’m still gonna be double-checking the blood spatter when the battle starts.

Yeah Pentious giving the grand toast to not dying, I’m not. I’m not emotional. I’m fine.

So this little scene with Alastor and Niffty…intriguing. Seems to show a softer side of Alastor, one where he hangs up the scheming for one minute and admits he’s been enjoying himself, enjoying these people (for their interpersonal drama entertainment value if nothing else). It’s funny and it’s sweet and definitely shows why Niffty sticks with Alastor on the off chance he doesn’t own her soul. And it also has me not completely convinced that when Alastor gets the chance to accomplish his goals by betraying everyone at the Hotel, he isn’t going to feel some level of conflict about it. Getting a character who believes so completely in their own infallibility to crack: the ultimate Good Narrative Food.

(nope hang on angel and husk are flirting pause the analysis have to go squeal about it—)

(I’m a veteran of the Good Omens (TV) fandom and got pulled into watching a snake and reptile care youtube, I know about snake hemipenes, why is the mention that Pentious might have them taking me out at the kneecaps)

Lute being Too Much for Adam never ceases to make me laugh. Or remember that she definitely deserves to be a main villain, at least for a little while. (Alright her name is Lute because “lieutenant” but for the longest time I thought her name was Lute as in “guitar-like instrument” because Adam WOULD, that weirdo; I choose to believe it’s both tbh.) Lute is someone who is way more a foil for Vaggie than anyone else right now, and the absolute struggle in her future is making me excited. ALL ABOARD THE STRUGGLE BUS, LUTE.

I’m sorry I just paused to make another note of something but it’s flown OUT OF MY ENTIRE HEAD because I just realized HUSK AND ANGEL ARE BOTH CRACKING THEIR KNUCKLES AT THE SAME TIME AS THE EXORCISTS APPROACH. WHAT WAS I SAYING??

Right. Vaggie. Got her new wings, and it’s interesting to me that she immediately hides them. Even more interesting to me that she CAN immediately hide them; none of the angels ever seem to, if they even can. That seems a little more…demonic in nature. Because Lucifer certainly can. Sera and Emily change their forms slightly, but the wings stay out at all times (mainly bc it seems Heaven is specifically formed around being able to get around with them on, especially the courtroom). Just one more way that Vaggie is embracing her new life, I suppose.

And here come the Vees, safe in whatever bunker they’ve got, and once again I can’t stress enough how Vox seems to be the only one with any interest in the proceedings. The other two are treating it like Vox dragged them to a sports event that he’s super into and they’re just along for moral support at best. The utter boredom of it all is something I can’t fathom. But I’ll try: this means nothing to them. The Hotel means nothing. The Extermination means nothing because they can just hide from it while the rest of Hell gets slaughtered. They’re cold-blooded ruthless manipulators who might be about to give Lucifer a run for his money if they aren’t stopped. I look forward to season 2 very much. Because on a grand scale, the Vees mean NOTHING. Their games are PETTY SQUABBLES. They don’t rank on the cosmic horror scale because the fight is so much bigger than they are. But they can sure throw wrenches into things!

ALRIGHT HERE WE GO THE PRODUCT OF MY MANY THEORIES ABOUT OVERLORD MECHANICS AND ALASTOR SPECIFICALLY: the shield moment. They seem to be expecting it to happen, so Alastor knew he could do it, but it’s my firm belief that he couldn’t until he made the deal with Charlie. He figured out that he can get powerups just from making deals themselves, or else has been doing it better than anyone else if it’s a known thing, and Charlie isn’t a slouch in the power department. So that’s my theory: Alastor is only able to go toe-to-toe with Adam at all because he’s borrowing a little taste of Charlie’s power from their deal. He’s already plenty powerful, and maybe he could do the shield the whole time, but I do think the deal with Charlie was made at a very opportune time, and Alastor probably only agreed to take on Adam solo because of his overconfidence in himself now boosted with having some of Charlie’s power. I only really have a gut feeling to provide as a source for this, because the only one who proves up to facing Adam is Lucifer; Alastor made a good call, possibly recruiting more of Charlie’s power more directly in a deal when he did, but Charlie isn’t a match for Adam, either, so Alastor very much couldn’t be. He has the speed and the skill to definitely give Adam a bad time, but he can’t withstand the power. Charlie doesn’t have the skill, but she could have the power in time. Lucifer…well, he’s an unfair powerhouse, deus ex machina in a top hat and resolving daddy issues, and we love that for him.

Anyway. Shield. Angels finding out in a very nasty way they can be killed. Adam being his usual misogynistic self. And then Adam deciding he’s over it and obliterating the shield in one punch.

I get the feeling that Adam really doesn’t do much during Exterminations beyond laugh and make tasteless jokes while occasionally smiting demons that get too close or look fun to squash. Because he just effortlessly whips out these shows of power that nobody seems to be able to account for, which makes me think it’s because nobody has ever seen Adam actually try and fight in earnest before. Following the theme of the show, they’re hopelessly outmatched (outgunned outmanned outnumbered outplanned I’M SORRY), and manage to pull a win out of their asses anyway thanks to the power of Love (and pulling Lucifer out of his millennia-long funk for at least half an hour), which Adam very clearly doesn’t have. But. Who needs Love when you have whatever terrifying powerup the higher-ups saw fit to give him?

“A mortal soul is no match for me, edgelord.” Okay. Okay. Here we go. So…Adam isn’t a mortal soul…despite being the first human soul in Heaven. He wields divine light and has a divine axe. Lilith isn’t a mortal soul despite being the original first woman, rules as Queen of Hell when she’s at home, and has an inspiring voice and song to grow Hell’s strength. It’s safe to say that someone else granted them these powerups (Sera/the Seraphim for Adam, Lucifer for Lilith). So…let’s look at Alastor again, just for a sec. He demonstrates ability far beyond what we see any other Overlord or demon do, seems to know his way around deals and loopholes like the slipperiest lawyer in existence, and his rise to infamy was meteoric. It’s a popular theory that instead of Lilith, the person holding the other end of Alastor’s leash is Roo, especially given the repeating eye motif that he has in his magic, but I wonder if Roo isn’t giving him a power-up already, and the deal where he’s caged is something else. If the two are separate in some way.

“You should know better than anyone what a soul can accomplish when they take charge of their own fate.” Now THAT…throws a very different spin on the theory, actually. If Adam and Lilith weren’t gifted their abilities, but took them, Lilith drawing from Hell and Adam from Heaven. If nobody gave either of them anything at all, but they found ways to elevate themselves. Or…made deals, perhaps? Either way, Alastor seems well on his way to becoming something Else just like they are, but. He isn’t there yet. Hence the need to make a deal with Charlie and stick close to her and her budding power. Hence why Alastor couldn’t take on Adam yet.

Y’know. I haven’t mentioned or noticed Alastor’s shadow much. But it certainly is a huge part of his power. Just like the microphone staff, which is broken now oh nooooo. But back to the shadow—the combination of the shadow plus the voodoo aspect of Alastor’s powers are a bit too much Dr. Facilier for comfort (which is hysterical given that Keith David is right there voicing Husk), but the tentacles add a nice touch. Although all of that, plus the deer aspect, plus the possible cannibalism and serial murder, plus the radio—does it seem like Alastor might have too much going on? Because I’m wondering how much of that is his, and how much is alternative powerups from other deals. He made his name as an Overlord killer, after all—and as an Overlord himself, owning souls grants power. I’m certain that whatever supply he’s high on, it’s the only way he was able to survive being first hit by pure holy light, and then cut down by Adam like that. So it must be working for him—but not well enough.

There is something so comedically horrific about how Adam just…vaporizes Pentious, war machine and all. It seems to be a pretty effective death; however, I do have to wonder how it would affect Pentious’ ability to be redeemed if it was angelic steel that got him instead of holy light. Either way, confirming that there are multiple ways to kill demons, angelic steel is just the most straightforward, and wow he’s just wholly gone now, huh? Not even any debris or a body or anything.

(Putting this theory up while I’m thinking about it: concerning Charlie’s deal with Alastor, and specifically the “one favor where you harm no one” bit, a part of me thinks that Alastor is going to have Charlie stand aside and let him kill someone…just to prove that they can be redeemed. Whether that’s Alastor’s purpose or not in killing is up for constant debate in my head, but I do want it made very clear that Pentious wasn’t redeemed until he died. Demonic redemption might require double death; maybe the souls are re-judged on double death anyway. Who knows??)

HEY, BLOOD THEORY CONFIRMATION: Dazzle (gosh I hope I got that right) bleeds black. He’s Hellborn. There IS differentiation in blood colors given in this show. NICE.

So why the ENTIRE HELL does Charlie bleed RED?

It’s subtle, it could be written off as her horns, but it’s there in certain shots; she’s bleeding from the head after Adam throws her into the hotel sign, definite drips that aren’t her horns at all, or bloodstains from possibly being close to cannibals who died. And it’s red. Why is it red? Why does she bleed red like sinners, Viv? WHY DOES SHE BLEED RED, VIV?

Because here’s the only thing I can think of: that means one, she DOES have a soul (an immortal soul, like Adam says, mechanic not metaphor), because two, she might be something close to half-human, or at least half-sinner, or half-whatever the actual hell Lilith is. This makes her powerful, but also incredibly vulnerable, just the same as sinners are with their souls. And it puts her more on their level; she isn’t some above-it-all royal that’s something entire Other from the sinners, she’s sort of partially one of them. (Not to say she doesn’t still have her royal privilege and so forth and et cetera let’s move on.)

Alright Vaggie hiding away her wings is kinda worth it for the badass blink-and-you-miss-it tearing open of the back of her battle uniform to let them out. And, uh, can we give Jessica Vosk ALL the credit for that absolutely unhinged Lute scream as she TEARS HER OWN ARM OFF??

(Also, to the legend who wrote the Lute’s Arm/Vaggie’s Eye fanfic: I didn’t read it but I think of you often.)

But: Lute and Vaggie setting up to be tragic narrative foils, most likely complete with Lute spiraling as she completely loses any sense of self or direction while her world crumbles around her and Vaggie going from suspicious to pitying. When the truth about how fucked up the Exorcist legion is comes out, I’m sure there’s going to be signs about how they were both hurt pretty deeply by being a part of it but handled it differently, Vaggie by being lucky enough to find a support group after she was kicked out and Lute struggling with carrying on the legacy alone. Also, calling it now, if Emily doesn’t Fall, then Lute is definitely gonna try to kill her at least once. Anyway. That’s probably super endgame stuff.

LUCIFER, DEUS EX MACHINA! Or. Uh. Diaboli ex machina? Eh who cares LOOK AT HIM GO. It’s such a fun fight, watching him zing around Adam and shapeshift and be all creative and zany. Right up until it matters—and then he’s all business. Fiery, deadly business. Also how did he get his voice to do that (the “you’re in my house now, bitch” part, not the “go home” part). But it’s such an important moment for witnessing that dreamer that Heaven cast out, the creative powerhouse that just wanted to make something nice, something meaningful. Adam can’t fight him because Lucifer isn’t really fighting. He’s playing. Right up until Adam threatens Charlie again. She’s the only thing worth fighting for to him, after all.

So very interesting to me too that when Lucifer is in his demon aspect, the snake on his hat becomes a halo. (Also, unlike the other Sins, he doesn’t get any taller. Bless him.)

Now. Let’s address the elephant—or, rather, the very small cyclops—in the room. Niffty killing Adam. It’s certainly a twist. It’s the biggest, weirdest twist I’ve ever seen. It kind of doesn’t make any narrative sense. It boggles the brain that Niffty, the littlest demon in the group, the bit side character, gets to kill Adam, the big bad of the season. But in a way…that’s kind of perfect? It DOESN’T make any narrative sense. LIFE doesn’t make narrative sense. Not everything is going to fit into a perfect metaphor. Although, if I tried…Niffty took out the biggest cockroach of all :P Alright I’ll be honest I don’t know. I’d love to read other people’s thoughts on why it happened like this. Because it’s not like I don’t enjoy it as a narrative choice, it’s just so jarring and my English major brain hasn’t made it make sense yet.

Such an unexpectedly tender character moment to have Adam’s dying smile be for Lute, though. Yeah, she’s gonna be REAL hecked up next season. And not because she’s way more homicidal than Adam somehow.

(Also, back to my blood color theory: cannibals bleed red. They’re sinners. Stop the debates, it’s canon and I can prove it now. Kinda. Still got the whole. Charlie bleeding red thing throwing a wrench into my everything.)

And we see some of the littler pieces to finish off a lot of my theories—the Vees’ ultimate plan to seize control of Hell going off pretty well despite the Hotel surviving (not that it mattered to them either way, the plan was to throw the other Overlords off their game and take their stuff, not mess with the Hotel at all); Husk and Niffty going about their days but looking surprised with the rest of the group when Alastor shows back up (and still uncertain if they knew he was alive or dead and if they even would know if he died tbh). But let’s take one last little peep at Alastor before I close the book on him for now.

Y’know. They really do make it unclear if it’s Alastor Altruist, or Alastor, altruist.

But more than that, it’s the first time he acknowledges his deal and the fact that his powers are limited—which is why he might use non-soul deals with others anyway, to get around his soul deal constraints. And if he’s LIMITED and he went to bat against Adam and held his own pretty well, maybe I need to rethink my own assessment of his strength and how he’s leashed (unless, of course, the theories are right and it’s a deal with Lilith keeping him constrained from using his powers except in her service, so he really was at maximum potential in that fight and just isn’t strong enough yet). But he’s confident (as he always is) that once he’s out of his deal, he’ll be where he wants to be, pulling strings and manipulating fates and probably strong enough to replace Lucifer (and wouldn’t it be twisty if Alastor used his favor with Charlie to let him kill and replace her father as King of Hell? Wild. Anyway—). But until then, he’s showing back up at the hotel after it’s been rebuilt, sans staff, and while fanon has latched onto the idea of his wound containing angelic essence that’s slowly killing him…I’m not so sure if canon is going to go that route, but his missing staff is probably way more significant than the wound, and I’m curious about that.

Now forget about these losers, let’s go check out the last two scenes and put proper bows on my last two theories.

First: Pentious, redeemed, showing up before the Seraphim and NOT at the heavenly gates. Convenient for keeping something this reality-shaking a secret! I still don’t know that I’m fully convinced that Sir Pentious is truly the first sinner to be redeemed; I still kinda think he’s just the first one that Sera and Emily noticed, but I’m looking forward to exploring that mystery more next season. Maybe with Molly as an actual character this time? The folks who keep drawing and writing about Molly and Pentious being friends, you’re legends, keep doing that; it will sustain me if I am disappointed.

Second: Lute and Lilith on a beach in Heaven, presumably. Alright, wording: “Adam is dead. Your deal is done, and I’m in charge now.” There is. So much to unpack in that. Starting with “Your deal is done.” Lilith…made a deal…with Adam? Adam made a deal with Lilith? Or Lilith made a deal with someone else, like the Seraphim, and Adam happened to be a condition? The most likely explanation is that Lilith made a deal with Adam, but for what and why remains to be seen. It sure looks like Lilith made a deal with her ex-husband to relax in Heaven and let Hell rot, but things really aren’t as they seem in this show; appearances are constantly deceiving. I’ve heard the popular theory that Lilith and Eve share a body (very, very weird implications if so), and it’s shown in some family portraits that Lilith can banish her horns just like Lucifer can his wings (or Charlie her horns, for that matter), but not showing Lilith’s eyes, keeping her shrouded in mystery—is that to conceal her identity as swapping between herself and Eve, is it just to build mystery about Lilith herself (who again is NEVER HECKING MENTIONED EXCEPT BY CHARLIE AND ADAM), is it for lolz? What the heck could Lilith and Adam have possibly traded for, anyway? Letting Lilith crash in Heaven in exchange for…what? The Exterminations have surely been going on for longer than seven years. Lilith could be imprisoned, but Lute’s behavior and language doesn’t convey that at all. Like, AT ALL.

Additional question: does Lute even have the power to take Adam’s place? Or will she get the power as she assumes command?

Anyway, moving forward in this scene, Lute later says “Your brat is threatening the very foundation of Heaven.” Interesting, showing that Lute is just as fearful of a Hellish uprising as Sera is and what that means for the safety of Heaven and the souls they’re protecting. “And if you want to stay here” And if you want to stay here. IF YOU WANT TO STAY HERE. Lilith is definitely there because she wants to be. Or at least Lute believes she wants to be. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if both Lilith and Lucifer are exhausted with their existences, but it is such a contradictory thing, for Charlie to believe so wholeheartedly that her mother is off doing something important, that she loved Hell and cared about its denizens, only to show Lilith on a beach needing to be threatened with leaving it to get up and deal with Charlie. But, then, Charlie also believed her father didn’t want to see her and didn’t really care about her. It’s possible that Charlie is wrong about her mother. But we have so few clues and it’s easy to assume the worst when this is how Lilith is truly introduced.

One thing I keep noticing and keep forgetting to go back and check for: Lilith’s necklace. There really aren’t very many details that don’t have some sort of thought put into them, and her necklace while laying out on a beach is…eye-catching, at least to me. It’s simple, but I just wonder if it’s present in any of the portraits, because I keep forgetting to check for it. Maybe if I write it down, I’ll remember to keep an eye out next time.

I’m sure that there are theories and threads that I didn’t finish, because I have word-vomited something like 24,000 words of theories and reactions and maddened questions; now that I have it all out of my system, maybe I’ll make organized, reasonable posts where the theories are actually separated and presented as cohesive wholes rather than themes carrying across episodes. But I have to get through my Helluva Boss analyses first!

Thanks so much for sticking around and sticking it out, and if any of this made sense, then I’m glad! Later!

#quilly's hellaverse theories #hazbin hotel #quilly writing

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sequinsmile-x · 2 years ago

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High Tide

An Alternate Version of Riptide

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This is part two of my two-year writing anniversary celebration.

Riptide was my first ever attempt at full-blown angst, and boy did I go for it. Over the last two years the one thing people have repeatedly asked me for is a version where they get a happy ending. So here we are.

Special shout out to Lina who let me read Riptide to her over Facetime recently..it was a journey haha

(If you have never read Riptide before please note the warnings/tags. It features Major Character Death among other triggers)

I hope you enjoy all enjoy this <3

-x-

Words: 4k

Warnings: Canon typical violence/injury shooting/gun violence, hospitalisation

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Emily is barely in the house when her cell phone starts ringing. The sound is loud in the seemingly empty house, and it makes her already pounding head ache.

She groans as she drops her bag onto the floor and she grabs the phone out of her pocket. For a moment she’s grateful it isn’t JJ ringing, not sure she could take another case so soon, but then she frowns at the withheld number.

“Hello?” She says as she answers it, making her way further into her home as she does. She looks around, surprised to see Aaron isn’t home yet.

“Am I speaking to Emily Prentiss?”

“Yes…” she says, coming to a standstill, the unmistakable sound of a busy hospital in the background. Her throat goes dry and she swallows thickly, “Who’s calling?”

“My name is Sally, I’m calling from George Washington hospital. It’s about your fiancée, Aaron Hotchner.”

She drops to the couch, scrambling for the tv remote as the nurse fills her in. She gives her a rushed description of a shooting at the pharmacy where Aaron had gone to pick up her medication. She listens carefully, her brain only taking note of the important details, like where he was, and the fact he was somehow still alive but in surgery, as she sees the CVS on the news on TV.

She calls JJ, and she doesn’t remember much else after that. ___

She’s staring at the floor. Counting the tiles in the waiting room over and over again so she could do something other than think about a life without him, or the grim look on the doctor’s face when they provided her with an update on Aaron’s surgery.

“Em?”

She looks up, her hands tightly clasped in her lap as JJ holds a cup of coffee up to her, one in her other hand for herself. Emily flashes her a quick, grateful, smile before she takes the coffee being offered to her, holding it between her hands. It’s almost a little too hot, but it’s grounding, something she can feel other than the overwhelming fear she’s trying to choke down. Worried that if she acknowledged it, if she allowed herself to fully feel it, it would be like admitting she had already lost him.

“I can’t promise it’s good coffee,” JJ says, sitting back down next to her, “But it’s hot, and I put extra Splenda in it for you, for the shock.”

“Thanks,” Emily replies, making no move to drink the coffee, her eyes fixed back on the floor.

“Em-”

“Don’t,” says, her voice stronger than before, and she looks at her friend, doesn’t miss, or particularly care about, the hurt that flits across her face, “Don’t tell me everything will be ok. We don’t know that,” she shakes her head, “It’s absurd if you think about it.”

“What is?” JJ asks, as patient as ever. Well aware that Emily’s frustration was nothing to do with her, but a coping mechanism to deal with what was happening.

“He’s done all kinds of dangerous shit throughout his life. Look what he did for a living for fuck sake. And not one, but two serial killers became obsessed with him and tried to kill him. And he gets shot and almost dies, and could still die, going to the fucking pharmacy,” she chokes out, her words shuddering around a sob she wouldn’t let loose, “It’s fucking absurd.” She closes her eyes tightly, fighting off the tears she knows are inevitable, that have been threatening to fall since she found out. “I can’t lose him JJ.”

JJ doesn’t say anything, and they both know it’s because there is nothing she can say. She simply reaches out for her hand, lifting it to link their fingers. It reminds Emily of a moment from what felt like a lifetime ago when Penelope had been shot.

Two moments in time crashing into each other and merging, like waves on the high sea.

___

His hand is cold.

It’s normal, according to the nurse, Louise, who she’d asked twice, because of the amount of blood he’d lost. She wants to scream that it isn’t normal, not for him, that his hands were always warm. That the simple press of his palm into her lower back was enough to warm her entire body, the closest thing to home she’d ever known. She keeps his hand in hers, hoping her skin can warm his up.

Her focus is on the rhythmic beeping of the machine showing that his heart was still beating, her eyes closed as listens. Taking some comfort in the steady beat despite the way it makes her headache worse, her sinus infection battling with her torrent emotions to see what would be victorious in making her snap.

She has no idea how much time passes, minutes and hours blurring into one as she sits there, frozen in place until he wakes up. She runs her thumb back and forth over his wrist, his pulse reassuring, something she would know the feel of anywhere. As familiar to her as his smile, his love.

“I’ve lived without you before,” she says out loud, the words escaping before she realises she’s going to speak, “And…I have no interest in going back to that, in living in a world that you don’t exist in,” she clears her throat, her vision going blurry as tears gather at her lashline but don’t fall. “So I need you to be ok.”

There’s a knock at the door, and the nurse, Louise, walks in, a plastic bag in her hands.

“I just need to do some checkups,” she explains, and Emily forces a tight smile, standing up so she is no longer in the way. She immediately finds herself playing with her engagement ring, twisting it around her finger. Louise walks up to her and passes her the bag, “These are some of his belongings,” she says as Emily takes the bag, “In all of the chaos earlier they were mixed up with someone else's.”

“Thanks,” Emily says, walking over to the small loveseat in the corner of Aaron’s room, taking a seat to busy herself with going through the bag. A lacklustre attempt to distract herself from watching Louise take Aaron’s stats, her skills as a profiler enough for her to immediately recognise if things were good or not.

She grabs his wallet first, her thumb rubbing against the soft leather, a gift she’d bought him last Christmas. His old one had been worn out, almost falling to pieces, and it was only when he opened his new one, a smile on his face as he spotted the monogram on the front, that he admitted Haley had bought him his last one.

They still had it, safely stored in the desk in their shared home office.

She puts the wallet to one side and frowns as she pulls bags of candy out next. She freezes at the sight of the orange bottle in the bottom of the bag before she reaches in to grab it. She can’t ignore the shake of her hand as she holds it, the white label that bore her name and prescription stained dark red.

Blood she knew was his dried over their address.

___

The pain was familiar. Greeting him like an old friend as he wakes up, his breath seizing in his chest as it briefly overwhelms him, all of his senses returning at once.

The first thing that makes it through the fog, the haze of the pain, is her.

“You’re ok, sweetheart,” Emily says, her hand squeezing his tightly, “You’re ok.”

Aaron opens his eyes, the lights bright in his hospital room, and it takes a moment for his eyes to adjust.

“Em?”

“I’m right here,” she leans over so he can see her, reaching past him to press the call button for the nurse.

He tries to squeeze her hand, but can’t control his limbs quite yet, his whole body aching and heavy. She notices, because she never missed anything when it came to him, and she smiles at him. She leans down to kiss his forehead and then rests hers against it, her eyes screwed closed as she feels his breath skip across her face.

“I love you,” she says, the words rushed, almost merging into one, saying them in a panic because she was worried he’d never hear her say them again.

“Love you too,” he replies, his voice breathless, and weak, but it makes her smile anyway, “what…what happened?”

“You were shot,” she says, the words tasting bitter. It was only the second time she’d said it, the first having been to JJ on the phone. She hears the door open, an indicator they are no longer alone, and she sees that he’s tired. Bound to fall back asleep within the next few minutes, “But you’re ok. We’ll talk about everything later.”

“Ah Mr Hotchner, it’s lovely to see you awake,” Louise says as she approaches, “Your fiancée was very worried about you.”

Emily smiles at her before stepping back to allow room for Louise to check on Aaron.

She keeps her hand tight around his, not wanting to lose the connection for even a moment.

___

“Are you ok?”

The question surprises her, partially because she wasn’t aware he was awake, but mostly because it seems absurd. Ridiculous that he’s asking how she is when he’s been stitched back together this evening, his breathing laboured from where a bullet had skipped through his chest. The damage left in its wake enough to have killed him.

She looks up from where her gaze had been focused on their joint hands, and the concern in his eyes makes her ache.

“I’m as ok as I can be,” she replies, squeezing his hand.

“No,” he says, blinking as he tries to clear his vision, the pain and the medication making him slower than usual, “I mean, have you taken your antibiotics? For your sinus infection.”

For a reason she can’t explain, that’s what breaks her. His gentle attempt to make sure she’d taken the medication he almost died getting for her enough to make the tears she’d been holding back for hours escape. Burning twin tracks down her skin in a way she’s sure will leave permanent marks behind.

“Yes,” she chokes out, a noise somewhere between a sob and a laugh catching in her chest, “I took the fucking antibiotics.”

He wants to reach out for her, pull her into his arms and comfort her, but he can’t. Even the simple act of shifting in his bed was enough to make pain snap throughout his body. Instead, he grips her hand as tight as he can, and he tries to smile at her.

“Good,” he says, wanting nothing more than to make her smile, “otherwise I got shot for nothing.”

It takes a second for his words to register, and her mouth falls open in outrage, her cheeks warm with something other than her tears.

“Aaron.”

“What? Too soon?”

She shakes her head at him, any desire to shout at him gone as soon as it had appears. She stands up and sits on the edge of his bed, careful not to hurt him, and she leans in. She pushes his hair from his forehead, and can’t help but smile at the slightly glazed look in his eyes, the medication he’d been given doing its job.

He’s looking at her in the same way he did when he had been drinking. She’d never seen him drunk, but when he was tipsy he was handsy, and he’d look at her like she’d hung the stars herself. It was as if the alcohol, and in this case the pain medication, took away any control he had on expressing how he felt about her. His love for her clear for everyone to see.

“I think it might always be too soon for this one, honey,” she replies, leaning down and kissing him, the cannula delivering him oxygen scratching at her skin.

He smiles apologetically at her, and furrows his brow, “What time is it?”

She pulls back to look at her watch, sighing as she does so.

“3 am,” she replies, “I shouldn’t even be here, but the nurse let me stay,” he raises an eyebrow at her and she clears her throat, avoiding his gaze, “I may have made it clear what I do for a living.”

He laughs and it hurts, his hand pressing into his chest as he catches his breath. She apologises, and he shakes his head at her, his grip on her hand tight as the wave of pain washes over him, ebbing away bit by bit.

“3 am?” He asks when he can talk again, and she nods. “Happy Birthday, sweetheart.”

She chokes out a laugh, resting her forehead against his. It occurs to her again that she could have lost him, that her birthday would have been her first full day without him, and the tears start again. Falling from her cheeks to his.

“Yeah,” she sniffs, her chin trembling with the force of her emotions, “Happy Birthday to me.”

___

Aaron groans as he gets to the top of the stairs, pausing as he leans against the wall to catch his breath. It was frustrating, his recovery slower than he remembered it being when he was attached by Foyet. Emily kept reminding him that it had only been three weeks since he’d been shot, and she’d smile when she pointed out that he was older now, that these things took more time.

He sees the light streaming out from under the door to the spare room, and he walks towards it, seeking her out so he could order their dinner. He pushes the door open and finds her standing in front of the closet in there, mostly used to store her vast number of coats, staring at a white dress hanging on the front of it. He registers what he’s looking at and turns around.

“Shit, Em, sorry,” he says, aware that from the start the one tradition she had wanted to keep was him not seeing her dress before they got married, “I didn’t realise what you were doing in here.”

“It’s ok, Aaron,” she replies, and he turns back to look at her, his gaze fixed solely on her face, “I think we’ve had our share of bad luck.”

He searches her face for a sign she’s lying, that she’s just saying it to make him feel better. That this wasn’t another thing he’d taken from her, but he sees nothing but her smile, a small sparkle in her eyes that never failed to draw him in. He walks over and wraps his arms around her, wincing slightly at the pull at his chest, before he kisses her. Stamping his lips against hers twice before he pulls back and looks at the dress in front of them.

“It’s beautiful,” he says, kissing her hairline, “You’ll look incredible in it.”

She hums, her arms wrapping around his waist as she rests her head on his shoulder, “Just not today.”

“No,” he replies, holding her a little tighter, pushing past the pain that thrums through his abdomen, “Not today.”

It was something they’d decided when he was still in the hospital. Postponing the wedding was the only sensible choice, and they both knew that, but it didn’t make it any easier.

Especially on the day that was supposed to be their wedding day.

“I’m sorry,” he says, shifting so he can look at her, “I know how much it meant to you.”

She frowns and pulls away, “Aaron, you mean a lot to me. Not some day we randomly chose, or a dress. You. If you’d…” she swallows thickly, “If you’d died…I’d be standing here alone,” she tries to smile at him but it shakes, and he cups her cheek. The warmth of his skin against hers was enough to make her heart stutter in her chest. “Plus, I need you on top form for our wedding night,” she says, her smile widening, “So you can be winded for another reason than just walking up the stairs.”

He shakes his head at her, joining in on her laughter, and he leans in to kiss her. They stand there as they both lose track of time, but not each other.

___

They get married on New Year's Day, just the two of them and Jack at the courthouse. It was perfect, and Emily can’t picture it happening in any other way.

She doesn’t wear the dress, opting for something simpler instead.

___

The knock on the door almost as soon as she gets home surprises her. She checks her watch as she wonders where Aaron is, knowing he should have made it home just before her. Her sinuses felt like they were about to burst and she wanted to get started on the antibiotics as soon as she could.

She opens the door to see who police officers stood on her porch. “Hi, we’re here to speak to Ms Emily Prentiss?”

Emily’s throat goes dry. “That’s me.” She makes no move to let them in. “How can I help?”

“I think it’s best we come in ma’am, and that you sit down.” The female officer says, a smile on her face that seemed fake.

Emily nods and lets them past her, closing the door behind them. She doesn’t sit, instead she crosses her arms across her chest and clears her throat. “What’s going on?”

“Ma’am-”

“Please.” She says, fear she doesn’t fully understand filling her chest. “Just tell me.”

The officers exchange a look before the male one looks back at her. “We believe Aaron Hotchner lives here?”

“Yes, he does.” She stutters out. “He’s my fiancée.”

“I’m sorry to inform you ma’am that he was killed earlier this evening in an attempted robbery of the CVS on Columbia Pike,”

___

She shoots up in bed, gasping to pull air into her lungs, misplaced grief stuffed into them instead.

“Em?”

She jumps at the feel of a hand on her shoulder, and she turns to look at him, placing her hand over his, her fingers digging into his skin.

“Aaron?”

“Yes, sweetheart,” he says, his other hand reaching out for her thigh, gently squeezing against her skin, “It’s me. I’m here.” She launches herself at him, her arms tight around him as she does her best to all but crawl under his skin, her hands forming fists in his t-shirt, “You’re ok, baby, you’re ok.”

His words are muffled against the top of her head, his lips against her hairline, and she feels herself relax, the edges of her nightmare fading away as reality washes over her.

She hadn’t lost him. He was right here.

“Sorry,” she mumbles, pulling back to look at him.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he says, reaching out and cupping her cheek, the metal of his wedding ring cool against her skin as he wipes away her tears. “The pharmacy?” She nods, confirming what he already knew. It had been a pattern ever since he’d come home from the hospital, all the months that had passed since doing nothing to stop her subconscious from torturing her with what could have been. “Come here.”

She lets herself be pulled into his arms as he lays them back down, and she ends up practically laying on top of him, the feel of his embrace providing her with the same comfort it always did.

“I love you,” she says, as she always did when she woke up from one of these nightmares, aware of the fact she came close to never being able to say it to him again.

Aaron kisses the top of her head and runs his fingers through her hair, attempting to lull her to sleep.

“I love you too,” he replies, “You know what I’ve been thinking?” He asks, and she hums in response, her hand reaching for his so she can play with his wedding ring, twirling it around his finger to remind herself that she’d put it there. That she’d had the chance. “It’s about time we went on that honeymoon.”

___

She’d grumbled about it. Half-heartedly complaining about the honeymoon she said they were both too old for, but she can’t deny that she needs this. A break from home, from work. From the trial, which was now only weeks away, that would hopefully send the man who could have taken Aaron from her to prison.

She closes her eyes and blows out a breath, shaking her head an in attempt to get rid of those thoughts, of the memory of what she could have lost almost 8 months ago. She opens her eye again and takes in the view in front of her, once again getting lost in it.

She had no idea just how much he’d paid for this, but they had a view of the Eiffel Tower from their hotel room, and she had spent most of the time since they’d arrived that morning standing on the balcony looking at it.

Aaron had given her so much. Not just love she hadn’t thought was possible in real life, or the sense of home she’d always been searching for. But he’d given her this. He’d made her love Paris again, something she had spent close to a decade now thinking was impossible.

She hears the balcony door slide open and she smiles as he joins her wrapping his arms around her from behind, pulling her back into his embrace. Emily leans against his back and smiles as he presses a kiss to the side of her head.

“Aren’t you glad I convinced you to do this?” He murmurs against her skin. He tangles their left hands together, their wedding rings hitting each other with the motion.

She tilts her head to look at him, and is unable to stop herself from kissing him, placing a hand on his cheek to keep him in place. She pulls back so their noses touch. “I’ll admit a honeymoon wasn’t the worst idea in the world.”

He kisses her again, smiling too widely against her lips for it to be more than a brush against her. “Where are you taking me first, tour guide?”

___

Guilty.

The word kept echoing around her head. She was no stranger to a courtroom, and she had given evidence at more trials than she could count, but this was different. She’d spent the whole trial sitting in the gallery along with the other victims or their relatives, listening to the details of the day that almost changed everything.

She’d watched the CCTV footage of the incident, of Aaron and other people getting shot, and it had almost been too much, her grip on her husband’s hand getting tighter as the days went on.

Guilty.

It was over.

“Em, you ok?”

She looks up to see Aaron standing in front of her, his hands on his hips. He was wearing a suit and a serious expression on his face, and for a moment it was like it’s almost 20 years ago and she was meeting him for the first time. She smiles at him and nods, and he joins her on the bench she’s sitting on, his arm around her shoulders.

“Are you ok?” She asks as she leans into him.

“I’m glad it’s over,” he replies, and she knows it’s all she’ll get for now.

“Me too,” she says, and she tilts her head to look up at him, smiling as she does so, “What do we do now?”

Aaron smiles and leans down to kiss her, his love and adoration washing over her before he pulls back, a soft smile on his face.

“Whatever we want.”

___

“Love was like the waves in the sea, gentle and good sometimes, rough and terrible at others, but that it was endless and stronger than the sky and earth and everything in between.” - Veronica Rossi

-x-

Tag list:

@ssa-sparks, @lukeclvez, @lyds102, @glockleveledatyourcrotch, @hotchnissenthusiast, @danadeservesadrink, @ssamorganhotchner, @emilyprentissisgod, @notagentprentiss, @freesiasandfics, @emilyshotchniss, @thecharmingart, @paulitalblond, @hancydrewfan, @camille093, @whitecrossgirl, @moonlight-2-6, @rawr-jess, @florenceremingtonthethird, @jareauswife, @ms-black-a, @sneetchestoo, @aubreyprc, @zipzapboingg, @psychopath-at-heart, @criminalmindsgonewrong, @fionaloover, @kinqslcys, @prentissinred, @ccmattiss22, @denvivale317, @thrindis, @hotchsguccitie, @cmfouatslota77, @alexblakegf, @aliensaurusrex, @prentissxhotch

Join my tag list here!

#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfic #hotchniss fanfiction #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #aaron x emily #hotch x prentiss #aaron hotchner fanfiction #emily prentiss fanfiction

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shenyaanigans · 2 years ago

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10 films i love

ty for the tag, @aerogadyne !!!!

Promare. so not to be cringe and make this my number one, but i just. absolutely adore everything about promare: it's funny, the art style is really fun, JYB and Billie Kametz (rest in peace) are there. i think the way it makes very clear, and remains quite adamant, that it is a visual story first and foremost is really fun. I LOVE the opening section, i actually think from a storytelling perspective it's so fascinatingly well done. you can see how it was inspired by the F&F series, how sure, there's a ton of pyrotechnics and shit that's there just to look cool, but there is a genuine heart underneath it that's really sweet and propels the story every single time i watch it. galo and lio are also just. such great protagonists. i adore them both so so much, great watch, 10/10

Everything, Everywhere, All At Once. One of my favorite live action films, this movie really speaks to me. I adore multiverse travel and I've toyed around with the idea of being able to exist in many universes all at once for a story, but I honestly wasn't sure it could be done. Seeing it done on screen so beautifully, so masterfully, and so coherently was just. Mwah. the symbolism was beautiful, the characters were so funny, and the tale of intergenerational wounds (what we inflict on our children is often a different version of what was inflicted on us) is poignant and thoughtfully portrayed and just. yeah. from what i understand, michelle yeoh really took this film over the top with her performance and notes to the directors, and i love how collaborative the space was. here's hoping it gets the recognition it deserves.

Looper. This movie fucks. this movie is everything i want in a sci-fi thriller, because it has so much soul. the way the movie really puts to task the idea of the masculine hero. there's a scene in this movie that just lives with me forever, because it's a scene that feels like it would belong in a gritty realistic action film, and yet it is so so sad. there's no cool music, there isn't a good reason for what happens other than it's procedure, and it physically hurts to watch. on top of that emily blunt is there and i am in love with her.

Knives Out/Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery. i'm putting them together not because they're the same film but because they scratch an itch of fun storytelling within a tried and true genre. i am so compelled by stories that have such eye for detail, and i've always been particularly interested in mystery stories. i also am obsessed with the camera technique they used for Knives Out. it's beautiful and i love it so so much.

The Truman Show. also a really really cool movie, i'm obsessed with the way this semi-predicted the sensationalization of people's lives, and the parasocial relationships we now have with people we feel like we "know". moreover, i rly rly like the commentary on art and the idea of caricaturing the self and how that ultimately makes the world around you a caricature, too.

The Adjustment Bureau. one of the first movies i ever really really loved, because i was super obsessed with the idea of trying to go against forces larger than you to be with the person you love (for some strange reason. who knows what that could be. 🌈) i got so interested in how this movie worked, i watched it over and over for years, until i could quote it by rote, and then i read the screenplay because i was desperate to know how it worked. i wouldn't say this is the best movie in the world; far from it. it has this beautiful, interesting premise, but it doesn't take any risks: david and elise are a straight cis white couple with no real barriers other than unforeseen hands saying that they can't. i think there's so much potential here, though, and it's the thing that i was so interested in for so so so long.

Your Name (Kimi no Namae Wa). not to be basic but this movie made me cry a lot. i'm such a sucker for body swap shenanigans in general, on top of time travel, but i rly rly rly liked the idea of two people connecting in spite of space and time and everything to do their damndest to save each other and everyone they loved. just because they cared. i always found that to be so powerful and meaningful.

The Invitation. this is a movie i have mixed feelings about because it was an interesting film and had a lot of really lovely motifs regarding grief, but it was also a film i watched with someone who is no longer in my life. but the music in it is really melancholic and beautiful, and i rly do think it's such a massively good take on how grief is powerful to eat up not just you, but everyone around you, too.

Gone Girl. brooooo this movie was so so so good, i loved it so much, although the first time i saw it i was not a fan because i was sixteen and i had to watch the cunnilingus scene with my dad right next to me. but the second time i watched it i was alone and also 22 and so it was rly good. i just love the bait and switch. i love the evil woman. i love everything about it. fantastic.

probably does not count but the Sense8 movie was bananas and cool and beautiful and i am so sad that show did not get the five seasons it deserved, it was a really, REALLY good idea. it fucked some stuff up, but this show was so queer and unapologetic about it, and i enjoyed just how much of the show was driven by love. i rly rly did.

anyways sorry this is long and full of my rambles, but even doing this list has put into perspective just how much of the same stuff i like LOL. anywho!!! i figure i'll tag... @caffernnn, @suhmayzooka, @relationshipcrimes, @futuresoon, @kavehandtea, @honeydots, @cawfka, @floodedlungs and anyone else who might be interested!! have fun, i want to see your favorite movies if you're up for sharing <3

#kat chats #long post #this was so fun....

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zetsubobu · 9 months ago

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orchid ⇢ what’s a song you consider to be perfect?

I would probably say "where are they now" by emily jeffri, I like the spooky feeling I get when listening to it and it doesn't even have much lyrics

cactus ⇢ something you’re currently learning (about)?

can't pinpoint anything specific but I always end up learning something new whenever I research something for my ocs or my danganronpa fanfic

bamboo ⇢ do you change into a different outfit when you get home?

I always do

abelia ⇢ do you have a particular piece of jewelry you always wear or can’t part with?

I actually don't wear any jewelry. Rings, bracelets or necklaces are always itchy to wear despite looking pretty fancy

daffodil ⇢ do you have siblings? if yes, in what ways do you think you’re similar to or different from them?

yes I have two younger sisters, one 3 years younger and the other one 6 years younger. I would say we are all similar when it comes to our ways of thinking and a lot of people tell me that either of them look similar to me. Our differences are our hobbies as they are more sporty while I'm artistic and they aren't exactly the type to be into games or anime overall. Their fashion styles are also different from mine

mahonia ⇢ what place, thing, activity inspires you most and how do you express yourself when it does?

My main source of inspiration is whenever I listen to a song that I think fits well to my ocs or a character. I also let other people's art or aesthetic posts inspire me. Pinterest is like a goldmine of inspiration to me and I often create moodboards for my drawing before I draw it

chia ⇢ what’s an inside joke you have with someone else?

Akina and her 100 siblings with @t3tch0

sage ⇢ what ‘medium’ of art (poetry, music, fiction, paintings, statues etc.) is the most touching to you? why do you think that is?

Can I answer all of them? I can't pick just one because my opinions tends to swing. Most often it's paintings though because I myself am painting (digitally)

edelweiss ⇢ how’d you think of your url/username? what’s it associated with to you?

I like my username. Story behind is that when I created it (zetsubo_bani in this case) I wanted something that was a reference to danganronpa (since that was my main fandom at the time) so I chose zetsubo (japanese for despair which is the whole theme of that show) and bani is in reference to the word bunny because I thought it was cute. The one on this account (zetsubobu) was created after I tried creating an email and zetsubo_bani was already taken so I took one of the suggestions it gave me as an alternative and somehow I liked that one more than the previous one

camellia ⇢ what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?

not at all tbh, I've always been obsessing over my favorite shows from a very young age. Back then it was ninjago (still is) and harry potter. Now it's black butler, ninjago and moriarty the patriot

jasmine ⇢ do you have a movie or book you loved but will never watch/read again?

hmm I can't think of anything right now. I used to love yandere simulator before I found out about the creepy dev

ivy ⇢ what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?

honestly I don't know. I'm autistic and unless I'm excited or really annoyed about something, a lot of people say they can't tell how I'm feeling as I look pretty neutral most of the time

chamomile ⇢ what kind of things do you like receiving as gifts?

art of my characters or anything related to my favorite shows/characters is like the best gift you could give me. I will be so happy

aloe vera ⇢ what’s something (mundane) you really want to experience in life?

I really want to go visit certain theatre performances and meet some of my online friends! Also go to an art con

palm tree ⇢ do you have a fictional villain you shouldn’t like but love regardless?

harumi from ninjago haha. I just love her, both the design and personality. In my opinion the smartest villain this show ever had

nutmeg ⇢ how’s your room/home decorated? do you have a specific theme or style going on?

I don't think I have a specific theme but my room is in a nice lavender + white color. My furniture is also in that color. I also have a wall in which I hang all the fanart of my ocs that I have received!

papyrus ⇢ if you put your ‘on repeat’ playlist on shuffle, what’s the first song that comes up? what do you like about it / associate it with?

I don't know honestly

taro ⇢ if someone called you right now to catch up, what’re the things you’d tell them about?

whatever happend in the fandom I'm in or show I liked. My life is honestly pretty boring but I like it as I rarely have any problems or trouble. Maybe about school once I start college in march but I often don't have topics to talk about

﹟random get-to-know-me ask game !!