#and well i still haven’t slept lmao

[mieldelsol]

last night i bumped my toe on our kitchen table now my toe is like 2x the normal size and early this morning i got food poisoning idk who put a curse on me but 🖕🏼 you

[quietwingsinthesky]

That's like exactly what most proshippers want? "Let me write my kinky shit because I think it's hot and leave me alone." I call myself proship because I read dubcon and stuff like bdsm AUs, and while there might be antis who are ok with it, I don't want to interact with judgy people. And most of them won't be okay with it anyway.

I remember a time when fandom didn't have either antis or pros and shipping wars were about which character is hotter. I want to go back there.

Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m saying. The point of me declaring that in my bio wouldn’t actually tell anyone anything about what I write or what I read or anything at all. It is purely about choosing a faction. It’s like.

Okay, the whole point of this is that people keep following me who have, somewhere on their page, “proship dni”. Now, why the hell they’re following me, a samifer blog, is their own business. Where it becomes my business is that “proship dni” doesn’t actually tell me anything except “if you post something I deem Wrong, I am going to turn on you.” It doesn’t tell me what that person thinks is Wrong, only that if I cross a line that I don’t know is there, then… Well, this is the internet, people get stalked, harassed, doxxed, etc for stupid shit like shipping all the time. Rather it not be me in anyone’s sights.

So. Proship in the bio. So hopefully anyone who sees it and is filled with disgust at the very idea that people can write whatever they want will turn away from my blog and block me immediately, rather than following me, getting attached to a random internet blog they do not know, and then feeling betrayed the next time I post some noncon and justified in acting on that betrayed feeling however they deem necessary.

I am tired. This whole senseless debate is tiring. There is no actual definition of pro or anti, not consistent across every person using it. Any anti will excuse a morally incorrect thing if they personally like writing or reading about it. Any proship person can turn and start a witch-hunt about someone for having a ship they personally don’t like.

But. Chances are, in my experience, if someone’s got ‘proship dni’ in their bio, it ain’t someone I want around, for their enjoyment of fandom and mine. So. Idk. This isn’t a solution. But it’s duct tape. It works.

[malachitezmeyka]

I cannot believe I’m making an OC whose appearance is based on my mom’s blorbo. How did I end up here

[1roentgen]

.

[woniiez]

ᴛɪʟʟ ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴇʀ ᴇɴᴅꜱ | ₗ.ₕₛ

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢꜱ. brothers bestfriend! heeseung x fem!reader

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ. You were sleeping when jay started banging on your door “y/n heeseung is gonna stay with us for the summer”. Lee heesung, your brothers best friend and the boy you’ve had a crush on since you saw him 5 years ago in your living room.

|| ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ. 4-6k (wrote this on my phone so i have no idea, tried to check it but it kept giving me different word counts)

ɢᴇɴʀᴇ. smut, brothers bestfriend.

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ. nsfw! smut lmk if there’s anything else.

(hii this is the first fic I’ve ever written, I obviously have a long way to go lmao but I hope you like it. This was written with really less detail and not too many complications something simple I guess. There might be a few spelling mistakes or the paragraph formation is messed up so bear with me on that 🙏🏻. Since this is the first time I’ve written it’s not really fully “fic coded” you could say Ig but I’ll learn in time, it could be different writing wise from a proper fic.Anyways I hope you enjoy and if you have any questions regarding this or anything else lmk.)

————————————————————

You’ve never really talked to Heeseung much. He comes over a lot but jay doesn’t let you hang out with them much, it doesn’t really bother you much but what did bother you was when jay started banging on your door to wake you up on a weekend at 8am to tell you “ Y/N!! Heeseung is gonna stay with us for the summer”

You couldn’t wait for summer break to come but now you’re grateful there’s still a week left.

you RAN to karina’s house which thankfully was next door. She was obviously still asleep.

“Karinaaa!! WAKE UPPP” you say while pulling the blinds up, “y/n it’s 8am please I haven’t slept all night” karina said while pulling the blanket over her face

“I need to tell you something. ” you looked at her with a very serious face waiting for her to sit up “yes y/n goodmorning to you too” you smiled at her and murmured goodmorning back “ok get this jay said Lee heeseung is gonna stay at ours for the summer..the WHOLE summer!” You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding. You waited for her to say something She looked at you like you ate her cat or something, she really is cranky in the morning “can you say something why are you looking at me like that” she took a breath in and out. Oh no u hate when she does that, it feels like she’s going to pounce on you “y/n..is this what you wanted to tell me so badly to wake me up at 8am on a Sunday?” She said in a calm and low tone. You just looked at her as u blinked slowly and nodded slowly, she wasn’t having any of it “y/n it’s not a big deal it’s just heesung and jay is best friends with him you literally see him everyday” well that was true but she didn’t know about the crush you had on him, you just couldn’t bring yourself to tell her.“This is gonna be a looongg summer” you thought to yourself.

It was the first day of summer.

As you woke up the golden sunlight peeked though your blinds, casting stripes across the room. Making you think “it’s finally summer” you smile to yourself. You yawn as you watch the dust particles flying around the window.

You threw your blanket away from you and went to freshen up exited for the summer. You tie your bikini around your hips and back, then throw on an oversized shirt and some jean shorts.

You walked down the stairs each step filled with excitement, thinking about everything you were gonna do this summer with karina, going to places we’ve never been or just hanging out in your backyard. You took a deep sniff smelling waffles from the kitchen. The smell of the batter, the sound of the waffle maker, and fresh maple. You ran to the kitchen to see jay cooking. You love your brothers cooking especially his waffles it’s something he only makes it in the summer. “Jayy you’re making waffles?!!!!???!” You said giggling

and grinning, doing a silly dance “when I met you in the summerrrrr~~” you sang as a smile spreads on jays face. He hums with you.

“Sit down y/n 5 minutes more” he said looking back at you raising his eyebrows. You were walking around the wall to sit on the counter and suddenly you saw heesung sitting on the chair “WHA-“ you were totally surprised and feeling like an idiot since you just sang and danced and HEESEUNG SAW YOU. You completely forgot he was supposed to be here.

You feel your cheeks heat up as you try to laugh the embarrassment off. You looked up at heeseung who was already looking at you up and down. With a slight smirk on his face he tilted his head to the side. “What’s up?”

he said. His tone is relaxed and raspy. You feel so small in his presence , you feel your cheeks burn and u look up at him “hey I heard you’re staying here for the summer”you say trying to relax your voice, you sit down on the chair next to him and look up at him waiting for an answer “mhm” that’s all he says. You think if you’re going see him the whole summer you need to get to know him better atleast. You tilt your head and ask,���Can I ask why?” Your eyebrows raise in curiosity and a gentle smile forms on your lips showing you’re genuinely interested, before he said anything jay came up to the counter and sets the waffles in front of you with a light frown he glances at you and says “y/n don’t bother him” his eyes meet yours and he slightly smiles. Heeseung takes a waffles and puts it on his plate, jay walks away to get the ice cream he looks over at you but you were already looking at him, you look away “im moving to New York after the summer cause of my dads work” he says,his tone relaxed. He shrugs, his eyes glancing away for a moment. “he’s already there so I’m staying here till I leave” he lets out a light laugh and takes a bite of the waffle. You look at him, your heart skipping a beat at the news. A mix of surprise and a touch of sadness washes over your face. “New York, huh? That’s a big change,” you say, trying to keep your tone light despite the flutter of emotions inside. You bite your lip, thinking about why you feel sad you barely know him?!. “Are you excited about it?” you ask, your eyes searching his, hoping to catch a glimpse of his feelings. He shrugs a bit. “I’m not really worried” he says nonchalantly. Not wanting to show too much emotion you take a bite of the waffle “oh okay” you said kind of sad but you think jay might be really sad since they’ve been best friends since they were 10.

It’s been about 2 weeks since you talked to heeseung. Even though you’re living together there’s not much interaction between you too, well there are moments when you’re going out in your prettiest clothes and he undresses you with his eyes. You try to ignore it as much as you can, you can’t betray jay like that no matter how much you want to right?

Eventually you decide invite Karina over and take a swim in the pool. The cool water feels refreshing, and the familiar scent of chlorine surrounds you, bringing a sense of comfort. As you float on your back, Karina asks you a shocking question “do you like heesung”she says looking at you with her eye brows raised and crossed arms. “Karin-“ you pause cause heesung is standing at the backyard door by the pool. Did he hear what she said? You’re just looking at him with a confused expression. Karina looks back and smirks to herself. You can’t help but say something,it’s getting awkward “hey Heeseung do u wanna swim?” You ask, Karina noticed how your voice sounds way different from when you both talk. He scratches the back of his neck and says “yea can I?” Looking between Karina and you. You try to communicate with Karina through your eyes “ofc you can” she says with a smirk on her face as she looks at you, you look at her with a confused face as you raise your eye brow asking what she was doing. Heeseung walks towards the pool and slowly with a confidence smirk he pulled off his shirt, his toned body revealing itself to you. You flinched at the sight, you thought how it would feel if he was on top of you and you touch his toned abs..

Suddenly water hit you and you fell of your floaty into the water “what the hell!” You looked at Karina thinking she did that but you heard deep chuckles coming from the side, it was Heeseung “sorry didn’t mean to do that, just diving” he shrugs and looks you up and down like he’s ready to undress you “oh yeah btw there’s a party here tonight” he said. You looked at him in confusion since your parents are home. He continues “oh um jay told me to tell you, your parents have to go to a wedding” you tell him you’re going inside to talk to your mom and jay. You get up and wrap yourself in a towel, by now you think heesung has a staring problem.

You take a shower, change and head down with Karina.

You see jay helping your mom pack you walk into the room “mom where are you going” you ask since everyone knows except you.

“Y/n honey me and your dad have a wedding to attend it’s in the next town so we’ll be back in the morning” you tell her to be safe, you look at Karina and smile looking forward to the party. “Jay take care of y/n and don’t do anything stupid” she looks between you and jay, you put your hands up.

As soon as your parents leave jay picks up his phone and starts calling people over. Since it is your last year why not have a party.

You walk up to jay as he’s wearing his watch he looks over at you “soo who did you invite” you ask out of curiosity since he didn’t tell you about the party which is in YOUR house. He looks at you smiling “anyone and everyone” he winks. You wonder what’s gonna happen tonight your head already hurts. You weren’t really into parties, just going if your friends invited you or when you need to get your mind off something. But tonight it’s someone. Jay looks at you thinking to yourself and says “y/n I’ll keep an eye out for you tonight” you already know what that means. Jay isn’t much of an over protective brother but when it comes to his friends or guys in general getting involved with you, he hates it. Since they’re not someone he fully trusts.

As you get ready in your room, the sounds of the party downstairs filter through the door. Muffled laughter and music. Making your heart race with anticipation. You can hear the clinking of glasses and the cheerful chatter. As you finish your final touches, someone knocks on your door “come in!”

You look at the door as it opens and it’s heeseung hes wearing a black Prada button up with black pants he looks. Your heart skips a beat you blink, he stands there effortlessly attractive. You can’t help but admire his face shape the way his body fits in his clothes, how his jawline is shaped perfectly his eyes are captivating.

Closing the door behind him he walks towards you with a knowing smirk leans down to your ear and whispers “baby you’re staring”. You’re taken aback, you take a step back but he still walk towards you. “I think you’re the one with a staring problem hee” you say fixing the collar of his shirt, he’s chuckles shocked by the sudden nickname and confidence. He presses you again your closet behind you and he slowly puts his thumb over your lips. Before he can do anything else the door opens and you push him away.

It’s jay he looks between both of you “uhm Lee let’s go Jake’s calling you” he says while looking at you. You feel trapped not knowing what to do. Heeseung winks at you secretly and heads back down. Jay raises his eye brow “y/n what the fuck don’t you remember what I told you” he says in a low and angry voice though you can tell he’s hurt. You try to say something with your heart racing, you try to scan jays face but he just walks away.

You walk down after fixing your lipstick. You spot Karina with some of your old classmates and join them.

The party is in full swing when you find yourself in the kitchen, pouring drinks for your friends. Suddenly, Heeseung appears beside you, leaning against the counter with that trademark smirk. “Need any help?” he asks, his voice low and teasing. You nod, trying to ignore the way your stomach flips at his proximity.

As the night progresses, the atmosphere becomes more charged. Laughter and music fill the air, but you can’t shake the feeling that something is about to change. You catch Heesung watching you from across the room, his gaze intense, and you feel a pull toward him that you can’t resist.

Later, as the party continues, you find yourself in a quieter corner of the house, away from the noise. Heeseung follows you, the tension between you crazy. “It’s crazy how we’re both here together,” he says, stepping closer. The air feels thick with unspoken words, and before you know it, he puts his hand on your waist leaning in, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, tentative kiss.

Your heart races as you kiss him back, the kiss getting deeper. The world around you fading away. You know you shouldn’t be doing this, but it feels too right to stop. Just as the kiss deepens, you hear your brother laughing, pulling you back to reality.

You break apart, breathless, and heesung looks at you with a mix of desire and uncertainty. “We can’t do this baby,” he whispers, but the way he looks at you says otherwise. The party goes on, but in that moment, everything changes. You kiss him again and deepen the kiss.

As you pull away from the kiss, your heart races,his forehead on yours. You glance toward the living room where the party is still in full swing. You can hear your brother laughing with friends, completely unaware of the moment that just unfolded between you and heesung.

“Maybe we should go back,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper, still feeling the warmth of his lips on yours. Heeseung nods, but there’s still hesitation in his eyes.

“Are you sure?” he asks, searching your face for confirmation. His hands go up and down your waist. The last thing you both want to do is betray jay, but you can’t help it after liking him for so long.

“I don’t know,” you admit, biting your lip. “But we can’t let anyone see us like this.” You take a step back, trying to regain some composure, but heesung reaches out, gently pulling you back toward him.

“Then let’s keep it our little secret for now,” he suggests, a mischievous glint in his eyes. His hands back on your waist moving upwards. You nod, the thrill of secrecy making your heart race even faster. You both go back into the party agreeing on keeping this a secret.

As the night progresses, you and heeseung have moments together, glances across the room, whispered conversations in corners, and the occasional touch that sends sparks through your body. The chemistry between you is undeniable, but you’re also acutely aware of your brother’s presence, and the potential consequences of your actions.

At one point, you find yourselves outside on the patio, where the sounds of the party fade into the background. The night sky is dotted with stars, and the cool breeze contrasts with the heat radiating between you.

“Do you think he’d be mad?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper. Heeseungs expression softens as he considers your question.

“I don’t know,” he replies honestly. “But I don’t want to hide this if it means something.” His words send a thrill through you, you’ve wanted heesung for such a long time but the thought of your brother’s reaction hangs in the back of your mind.

As everyone starts leaving it’s already 2am and jay is extremely drunk. You ask heesung to put him to bed.

You’re sitting in on your bed still wearing your black mini dress when the door opens and closes with a bang. It’s heesung he’s charging towards you suddenly he gets on top of you. You’re just looking into his eyes looking for something but they’re just filled with desire. As you’re about to say something he puts his lips on yours capturing them into a kiss.

It starts of slow, he sits against the headboard and you climb on top of him, your knees on the sides of his thighs. He pulls you in again for a deep kiss, he puts his hands on your waist tightening them. They way yours and his lips are moving next to each other feels unreal, he pulls you even closer towards him, you release low moans now needing him as close as possible. As the kiss gets heated you feel his tongue licking your self asking to go in, you let his tongue enter and explore your mouth he groans. He puts his hand on your zipper, you look at him and nod.

He quickly takes it off and looks at your perky boobs “so fucking sexy baby” he looks like he wants to eat you. You gasp when he takes one of your nipples in his mouth “hee-“ and swirls his tongue around,he gives the other one attention aswell taking it in his hands god. His hand goes down to your clothed core as he starts rubbing over it. “Hee please” you cried out, “please what pretty, say it” he whispered

You moaned and squirmed against his hard cock, making him hiss “baby u need to stop moving”.

He laid you against your back and started placing kisses all over your neck and breasts making you breathe heavily. As he placed kisses all over your body he reached your wet core. He took his shirt off revealing his toned body you started kissing him everywhere until It all went too fast when you suddenly felt a hot wet sensation licking your pussy slow. Your eyes rolled back, feeling hee’s tongue going deep in your pussy and sucking on your bud. Your moans could no longer be held back, letting them out freely for everyone to hear.

“H-hee ah- wait!” You cried out feeling your orgasm coming faster than you thought since it’s been 2 minutes. Heeseung didn’t stop, feeling your pussy tighten and open and before he knew it too, his tongue was getting covered by your juices. He licked his lips while looking at you, you thought you could look at him like this forever.

As he takes his pants off with his underwear you look at him surprised at how big he is. You gulped.

Heeseung notices your expression and smirks “you ready baby?” You nod aggressively not wanting to wait another second.

He kissed you everywhere complimenting every little thing, he leaned over and positioned his dick at your whole and slowly pushed it in. “HEE! Fuck” you moan, he thought you looked so pretty with your mascara running down your face because of him.

“Fuck baby you’re so tight” he groaned

You let out a ragged breath feeling him in you. He felt so big and you felt so full. Heesung looked at you asking if he could move “u-h you can move” heeseung nodded and moved slowly watching your face as you roll your eyes back in pleasure.

That’s when he started moving faster, you both were a moaing mess. Panting against each other.

Heeseung groaned feeling you squeeze against him, he could feel his orgasm coming.

You felt your orgasm coming as he went in and out “f-uck hee im cu-ming” you moaned and closed your eyes as it came over.

Heeseung thrusting in deeper while you got off your high. He let out a raspy laugh.

You both were breathing heavily after he came and laid down with you. “that was-“ you said panting

“great. “ heeseung looked at you and kissed you once more before he got up and got a towel from the bathrooms and cleaned you up before laying back down.

“Hee?” You said laying down on his arm. “Yeah baby?” He pulled you closer under the blanket “when will you leave for New York?” You said. Your voice not above a whisper, he looked at your sad expression and put a strand of hair behind your ear “I told my dad already im not leaving”he said. You sat up holding the blanket to your chest, “wait really?!” You said smiling so big it hurt. “Yea. “ he said. Hugging you tightly. “I love you hee” you said looking into his sparkly eyes as u pecked him on the cheek “I love you too baby”. He kissed you back.

The sun was out ask you opened your eyes, you rubbed your eyes the memories of last night came flooding back into your mind and you couldn’t believe that actually happened. A smile crept onto your face.

You felt heeseung holding you tightly by the waist. You shifted to look at him, he looked so pretty while sleeping as well. You started tracing his lips and his nose even his eyes. He started blinking and smiled “goodmorning” he said, his morning voice so raspy and attractive. “Morning” you giggled and put your face into his neck.

You suddenly pulled back hearing your door open. “y/n wake uppp!” It was jay.

He stood there looking at both of you naked under the blanket.

He started blinking in disbelief.

Heeseung tried to cover you with his body which made you laugh.

You totally forgot you were in the same house as jay through all that.

Jay just walked out. You looked at heeseung confused why jay didn’t punch anyone. You and heesung got dressed and went down to the kitchen to talk to jay.

You both sat on the chairs in front of the counter where jay was making breakfast.

You started “jay uh.. can we talk” you felt like you’ve betrayed your brother big time, your mind had a lot of things to say but you need to tell him the truth first.

Jay looked back at you with his eye brows furrowed he nodded letting you know to go on but before you could heeseung started talking “look man im sorry it happened this way, I never wanted to hurt you or y/n” he lets out heavy breathing.

You could see how hard this is for heeseung because this is his only one friendship he cares about.

Jay looks at him very angrily “if you didn’t want to hurt me you shouldn’t have done this” he said in a higher voice as he crossed his arms. You felt bad for heeseung for getting the blame “jay it’s not his fault I also wanted too” you say searching jays eyes for something but they were just empty “y/n I know and that’s what I hate more, I told you so many times not t-“

You didn’t let him finish and told him the truth. “I love him” you say.

Heesung hold your hand and jay looks at heesung for an answer. “I love her aswell” Heeseung says in a very straightforward and sincere tome. Jay turns his back, you both give him some time to think. He turns back and sets breakfast up he glances over to both of you “Heeseung you better treat her right or she’ll have to witness your funeral” jay said while smiling as he hugged heesung. You looked at Jay with a smile “im sorry and thank you” you hugged him back.

In the evening you invited Karina over for a barbecue your dad was hosting. You told her everything.

She was really happy for you.

After the barbecue ended all of you jumped into the pool.

Heeseung pulled you to him and gave you a peck on your lips he whispered “I love you” you giggled and splashed water on him.

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© won!!ez , 2024. do not copy, steal my stories

[writinandcrying]

TMNT HEADCANONS - Taking naps with the turtles / having a sleepy S/O

As someone who has accidentally slept for 23 hours straight and literally has a nickname as “snooze” I’m obligated to do this (I tried to look for a cute / aesthetic gift but that pup is my spirit animal fr)

I’ve been digging how @oozedninjas does their Headcanons (as long with their writing, I seriously eat it up everytime yum yum yum)

as much as I love looooong Headcanons, sometimes I only have some blurbs going on in my mind, I also think this keeps things so dynamic, every interaction can be seen and everyone is happy yipee (I hope you don’t mind me using your writing style? Headcanon Set-up? Layout? as reference! Pls let me know if so, I’ll def take it out or reference you on new ones!)

English is not my first language and I didn’t proof read this, if there is any gramatical erros pls don’t hesitate to tell me!

• Isn’t the one for naps, lowkey thinks it’s a waste of time, he rather do activities with you! Time is precious! That being your hobbies or his, talking, playing games or reading, he has his mind set on it… until you flutter your lashes at him, giving him puppy eyes, and suddenly at the warm of your embrace, the way you hum over his plastron, how cute and serene you look… he starts questions himself, why haven’t you two done this sooner?

2003, 2012, Rottmnt Donnie

2003, MM Raph

2003, MM Mikey

All Leo’s (minus MM and rise) lmao

• Has been waiting for it. Since you two have been officially a thing, he has been patiently waiting for it. wants to do nap dates, casual napping after Sunday lunches, accidentally napping from watching a boring film, coming home late and you are tired? Lay on top of him babe, let him will take care of you 🫶🏼 adores the innocence of holding you close, caressing your skin as you caress him back, finally admiring your features while you sleep, he longs for it, absolutely eats it up

MM AND ROTTMNT LEO !!

2007, 2012, ROTTMNT, Bayverse Mikey (keeping bayverse and 2012 still would be A Task (but anyways BOTH WANTS IT) 2007 is probably tired all the time bc of his gigs lol)

Bayverse, ROTTMNT RAPH !!!!

2007 and 2003 Donnie

• How come you are always this sleepy? This doesn’t make sense, something has to be wrong with your vitamins levels, have you been sleeping at night? Are you having nightmares? What kind of meds are you taking? Your sleep schedule and how you can just simply fall asleep everywhere is astonishingly worrisome, he will look into it

Take a wild guess (all versions)

Doctor feelings

• HE is the who Needs a nap. Drag him to his bed. Hold him close, put ambient music, kiss him softly and don’t let go.

2007 Leo, Future!Rottmnt Leo

2003, 2007, Future!Rottmnt DONNIE !

Future!rottmnt and Last Ronin Mikey

Future!Rottmnt, bayverse, 2007 Raph

Everyone in IDW-TMNT

Not a turtle, but Rottmnt Casey Jones

• can’t take naps (light sleeper or doesn’t want to mess their sleeping schedule) but enjoys you being by his side anyways, will give a dirty look to whoever makes loud noises next to you, tries to always save the most comfortable spots for you on movie nights, he knows you are bound to fall asleep. will takes embarrassing pics of you tho

Take another wild guess (all versions)

And another one (all versions as well)

Mm Donnie

[saetoru]

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。underneath the stars (looking for a sign)

synopsis. al-haitham thinks waking up beside you feels like a dream—well, until it doesn’t

— word count. 4.1k (how did a drabble get here sobs)

— contents. pining al-haitham, honestly it’s mutual pining lol, gn! reader, implied one night stands, consumption of alcohol (both reader and al-haitham) reader is a matra, al-haitham is acting grand sage, it’s basically the “avoid my crush after i accidentally sleep with him until he corners me” trope lol, confessions, brief angst and then a happily ever after, sfw + fluff, not proof read—this was entirely written on tumblr drafts through mobile app. yeah. we raw dogged this bad boy lmao

— notes. if you knew. how many wips i have with him. you would be astounded :,) he’s all that matters anymore

al-haitham wakes up to a bed much softer than his, red flag number one. there’s also a weight on his chest, red flag number two. red flag number three, however, doesn’t make itself apparent until he opens his eyes and sees you.

oh. not good. you’re covered in the sheets, but you’re clearly…topless, and a quick glance at his own torso tells him he’s also not clothed. oh. double not good.

but there’s also a small voice in his head that’s cheering and patting himself on the shoulder—he’s managed to fall into the bed of the very person he’s been quietly pining over for months, what more can a guy possibly ask for?

but unfortunately, his mini celebration in his inner thoughts is disrupted when you open your eyes at the disturbance from his movement—and before he can get even one word in, you shriek. rather loudly, too—it makes him wince at the sound (he’s always had sensitive ears.)

“what are you doing here?” you gasp, “and why haven’t you got a shirt—wait. why haven’t i got a shirt on?”

“well, it seems—”

“you slept with me?” you gasp again, cutting him off as your face twists in disbelief, “while i was drunk?”

“i was drunk too,” he points out, frowning at the accusations. al-haitham is a respectable man, and more importantly, he cares about you too much to take advantage of your inebriated state like that. “it was a two way street.”

that seems to calm you for…approximately two seconds before your face twists in horror again.

“al-haitham,” you wail his name in despair, slumping onto your mattress in defeat, “this is the worst thing we could have done. do you realize that?”

oh. you regret this—the voice in his head suddenly stops cheering. it deflates, in fact.

worst thing. is this really the worst thing? al-haitham thinks you both have always gotten along rather well, and he’s always taken your slightly stuttered words and nervous chuckles as a testament to holding the same attraction he holds for you. but maybe he was too quick to assume you feel the same, and your words now feel like a boulder on his chest. they’re heavy. soul crushingly heavy, in fact—but he keeps the blank expression on his face ever so easily.

“yes, it seems a bit inappropriate for coworkers to have an entanglement,” he agrees after a moment, making you whine at his word choice.

“you don’t have to call it that,” you huff.

then, out of sheer curiosity (and absolutely nothing else), you take a quick peek from the corner of your eyes at his chest. in your defense, his shirt leaves practically little left to the imagination, and when else will you get the opportunity to see his (very impressive) chest? a peek won’t hurt.

you’re thoroughly impressed when your eyes catch his sculpted pecs. his eyes are thoroughly unimpressed when they catch your gaze.

“well, what would you like to do about our predicament?” he asks flatly.

acting uninterested is the hardest part, he realizes. here, you’re within reach for his arm to curl around you, and yet somehow, there still feels like there are miles of space between you in the sheets. it’s a bitter reality, he thinks, one that stings a bit more than he’s ever really imagined.

al-haitham has witnessed lots of rejections in his time. whether it’s at the akademiya where he is the unfortunate witness of a rejected confession, or in novels he reads of unrequited feelings. he however never thought he’d land himself in the same situation—even if he hasn’t technically confessed to you yet. but your reaction definitely feels like one, and he’s smart enough to deduce that if he did confess, you wouldn’t take too kindly to the idea.

sure, it’s a bit unprofessional for the acting grand sage to have a relationship with one of the akademiya’s top matra that he works with rather frequently, but al-haitham is only the temporary grand sage. technically, after this, he will be going back to being the scribe who makes himself scarce on a regular basis. and it’s not very unprofessional for the scribe and a matra to be romantically involved, he’d like to argue. most people meet their significant others through the akademiya in the first place—why should he be any different?

but one glance at your face tells him you’re rather unhappy with this situation. he thinks he can hear a crack where the boulder resides on his chest.

“i think you should leave,” you mumble, chewing nervously on your lip, “and don’t say anything about this to anyone. especially not cyno.”

“noted,” he says blandly. you turn away, letting him have the privacy to rise out of bed and dress—which he does as slowly as possible, just to drag out the feeling of being in your bedroom for just a while longer—before he says clears his throat. “i’ll be seeing you,” he says.

“sure,” you nod awkwardly, “see you at uh…see you at work.”

with that, he walks out of your bedroom, and sees himself out. as soon as you hear the front door shut, you turn and scream into your pillow—the same pillow that happened to be under al-haitham’s head for the entire night, the same pillow that smells like his shampoo.

you think for a moment how you can never wash this pillow case again—and then, when you realize just what you’ve thought, you scream again.

you might just be entirely screwed.

—————

“and where have you been?” kaveh is waiting in the kitchen as soon as al-haitham enters.

great.

kaveh has a talent for making himself available to chatter away into al-haitham’s ear on the most stressful of days. whether it’s to greet him with complaints about having no help with cleaning after a long day of work, or to bang on his office door and demand an explanation for rejected funds as he does paperwork, or to ask where he’s been after he’s been wounded rather harshly by the one person he’s ever felt romantically inclined for, kaveh is always there at the worst possible timing.

leave it to kaveh to sour his mood more.

“i don’t see how it’s any of your business,” al-haitham mutters, grabbing the glass of water on the table and chugging it to help with the slight hangover he nurses—it’s evidently not his best morning in more ways than one.

“hey, that’s my glass,” kaveh scolds, “get your own.”

“it’s actually my glass. from my grandmothers set,” al-haitham corrects his roommate, “and i pay the water bills. so it’s my water too.”

“you—” kaveh shakes with frustration. it would pull a bit of an amused grin on al-hairham’s face if he wasn’t in the worst mood possible. “nevermind,” kaveh huffs, crossing his arms, “where were you—wait, is that a hickey?”

“no,” al-haitham says instantly, pulling his cloak higher to cover his neck—but kaveh beats him to it, reaching over and inspecting his skin. he seems to light up as soon as he realizes it is, in fact, a hickey on al-haitham’s neck.

“it is a hickey,” he grins gleefully, gasping in sheer disbelief that al-haitham seems to have some sort of life outside of work and home, “this can’t be. did you pay someone to get into bed with you—”

“just because some of us can afford such services doesn’t mean we indulge in them,” al-haitham grumbles, which earns an offended gasp from the blonde, “and i’m not obligated to tell you where, or with who for that matter, i was—”

“was it that matra you’re always standing around with?” kaveh grins knowingly, cutting him off.

the mere mention of you must make his face fall—which is new, because al-haitham has always been good at hiding his emotions on his face. but kaveh seems to have realized he’s overstepped, because his smile fades just as quickly as it comes.

“it doesn’t matter,” al-haitham mutters, “it was a mistake.”

“a mistake? but you’ve been pathetically pining for months, anyone with eyes can see—”

“i’ll be going to work now,” al-haitham cuts kaveh off, “make sure you pay this months rent on time.”

with that, he turns, making his way to his room to shower and then be off to the akademiya—where he equal parts hopes he doesn’t see you, and equal parts hopes he runs into you just to catch a glimpse of you again.

—————

you haven’t seen al-haitham is six days—correction: you’ve avoided al-haitham for six days. admittedly, it’s becoming increasingly difficult seeing as he is the acting grand sage, and you do need him to approve of your reports from recent investigations—but then you remember how six days ago, in the darkly lit corner of the street on your way home, you both kissed.

(and yes, it was a drunken mistake—neither you nor al-haitham value public displays of inappropriate affection between coworkers, but that doesn’t erase what happened.)

perhaps it would be easy to laugh it off as an impulsive action the both of you took while being under the influence, but then you both stumbled into your house. and then your bed. and then a kiss turned into more…and then next thing you knew, you’ve been awakened to a very unclothed (but still very handsome) al-haitham next to you in the mattress.

you should be mature and face him—people can sleep with people and not let it mean anything, proper adults would simply brush over this and never look back. but al-haitham is a bit of a difficult scenario.

he’s handsome—painfully so, with those sculpted muscles and those soft strands of hair that fall perfectly over his face. but more than he is easy on the eyes, he’s a charming individual. at least to you—you think the majority of the akademiya would have to disagree.

but al-haitham is kind, he greets you properly, holds doors open for you, and he often notices when you’re tired just by looking at you before giving you extensions on reports. he’s caring, you can tell because he’s helped people more than once, and while he claims it’s for the sake of his own convenience so he can avoid extra trouble, you know that he doesn’t have the heart to turn away from those that need him. more importantly, al-haitham is disciplined—it’s something all matra such as yourself can appreciate.

he seeks out knowledge in the most moral of methods, he never crosses limits or abuses power even when he holds the ability to, and he never takes advantage of the authority he may hold over others.

he’s wonderful, you can’t help but think—and admittedly, his hands also have very attractive veins that make you sweat a little. but that’s not the important part, of course. the important part is how perfect his character is, if you take the moment to understand it. and you like to think you understand it—much more than most at the akademiya.

except romancing the akademiya’s grand sage isn’t the best look for a matra—especially if you want to climb up the ranks soon. you don’t want rumors spread to undermine your hard work…or worse, be accused by the general mahamatra of taking your position as the grand sage’s lover to your advantage for work gains.

cyno is a strict individual—you’d hate to get on his bad side. and just as you think about how awful it would be if he got the wrong impression, he walks right up to you.

with that serious look on his face—why does he always have that serious look on his face?

“grand sage al-haitham requests you in his office,” he says. you don’t detect any suspicion in his voice, and it seems like a perfectly normal statement, but that’s the thing about cyno. he’s too good at not letting his movements be read, too good at cornering caged animals before dragging them by the ankles out in the open, exposed and vulnerable.

you gulp. “did he say why?” you ask, “i’m a bit busy.”

“no,” cyno shakes his head—and then he looks at you oddly, “you don’t seem busy.”

“well….this report won’t write itself,” you chuckle nervously, which only makes his brows furrow in confusion.

“wasn’t that due two days ago?”

fuck.

“yes….but al-haitham gave me an extension.”

“he seems to give you a lot of those,” cyno points out, unimpressed.

well, that’s great, you think. surely, there is no other matra as good at losing composure and making things more obvious for themselves than you.

“i haven’t been feeling well,” you say quickly—which isn’t the worst excuse, seeing as you’ve hardly shown your face at the akademiya for the last few days.

cyno seems to buy it too, because he nods in understanding before giving you a concerned look. “you shouldn’t push yourself, you know,” he lectures, “being sick snot fun.” you blink, and he looks thoroughly amused with himself. “get it? because when you’re sick, you might have a runny nose? snot? and—”

“right,” you nod, “i’ll be seeing the grand sage now. i wouldn’t want to keep him waiting.”

at least you know cyno has not made any….inappropriate assumptions if he’s making jokes, as painful as they might be. you’re not sure if you’d rather face al-haitham or continue to listen to the general mahamatra’s interesting sense of humor, but the closer you get to the grand sage’s office, the more you want to turn back and find cyno again.

but you’re an adult, and adults do adult things sometimes, and sometimes they’re not the most ideal, but the only way to handle such situations is the adult way—to be mature and not let things get in the way of being professional. easy enough.

at least, you hope.

—————

“you called for me, grand sage?”

ouch. al-haitham has now been reduced to grand sage, not just al-haitham. he looks at you for a moment, and he tries—really, he does—to seem unbothered, but his brows crinkle before he can stop them.

“i did, yes,” he says, looking at you.

you look lovely—which, you always do, even when you’re nervous. he can tell you are because you have that habit of chewing on your lip when you’re nervous, and he hates that he makes you anxious enough to do that right now.

al-haitham has always hated the gap between him and everyone else—not because he enjoys being close to others, but because it’s burdensome to always seem like a pretentious asshole. being interpreted as one over the years has left him quite numb to what other people think….but that’s not the case with you, unfortunately. he wonders if you’ve ever thought he was an asshole, or if you’ve ever felt that he acts like he’s better than you are. he hopes you’ve never talked to him and thought he’s condescending like kaveh insists he is—he hopes you find value in his honesty and find him insightful.

he thinks you might have at one point, if the way carrying conversation with you is so easy is of any proof. it feels natural, talking to you. your voice is smooth, especially when it reads over mission reports to him in his office. your laugh is even smoother, though—it’s soft, and honeyed, it sounds like something he’s been missing his whole life.

everything about you feels like something he’s been missing his whole life, like he was born to be with you by his side, and he’s been empty without you all along.

you clear your throat, handing him papers as you pull him from his thoughts and say, “here is the report for that last investigation,” you say quietly, “i apologize for the untimeliness. it won’t happen again—”

“that’s not why i called you,” he cuts you off.

al-haitham is a straightforward man. he’s watched many confessions, and he’s read about many confessions, and he’s even thought about how his own confessions might go should he ever find someone he finds interest in.

but this isn’t interest. al-haitham is not interested in you—he needs you. to call this a confession might be incorrect, he thinks for a moment, because this almost feels like he’s about to plead for you to give him a chance.

“oh,” your voice is small.

you think you have an inkling of an idea of what he’ll bring up, and you contemplate running out of his office and begging cyno to tell you a few more of his jokes….or a few dozen….maybe a few hundred to be safe.

“we should talk about that night—”

“well, there’s not much to talk about,” you say simply, “you and i are consenting adults, and we happened to be heavily under the influence, which caused a lapse in judgement. it’s a bit unprofessional, sure, but as long as neither of us say anything, and as long as we manage to keep a professional atmosphere between the two of us, there shouldn’t be any—”

he cuts off your (rehearsed in the bathroom mirror many times) speech as he clears his throat. “i….” the words are caught in his throat.

for a lifetime of straightforward honesty and blunt words, it seems like now of all times he can’t seem to speak.

“you…?” you motion for him to continue.

“i enjoyed it.”

you sputter. his eyes widen as he stumbles over his words when he realizes what he’s really said.

“grand sage,” you gasp, “i think that’s hardly appropriate for—”

“n-no, i meant i enjoyed you,” he says quickly, making you furrow your brows.

“and what does that mean? because—”

“i enjoyed being with you,” he croaks. it’s a good thing kaveh isn’t here to witness this, because as a self proclaimed expert at love (which al-haitham would have to disagree), kaveh would have an absolute ball watching this. “i don’t….i would prefer if we didn’t pretend nothing happened,” he mumbles, “if you feel the same, that is.”

everything about al-haitham is hopeful. from the way his eyes watch your every movement as they stare at you, to the way he clutches the pen in his hand tightly in anticipation of your response, he’s hopeful. you can tell.

you can tell he’s hopeful you’ll say yes, that he’s hopeful you’ll say you feel the same way as him, that he’s hopeful he’ll see you again in a setting that’s not just for work and mission reports and investigation details.

he’s hopeful you’ll say yes to his pleading eyes and fill that empty spot beside him that’s been empty for far too long.

and it feels like swallowing lead when you sigh heavily and watch the hope crumble.

“al-haitham,” you mumble, “this wouldn’t be very wise, you know?”

“and why’s that?” the hurt in his face is almost tangible.

he’s not foreign to rejections, he’s witnessed them his whole life. he watched that haravatat scholar that declined the amurta one outside of class that one year. he read about that main character that found self respect and declined the toxic love interest in that novel he read last summer. he’s declined his own fair share of confessions by random scholars that stare a bit too long at his chest and arms for his liking.

but for some reason, he never imagined it to feel like this. like being with your for one second longer might just burn his skin, but being away from you might leave him cold and numb. al-haitham thinks that if you walked out that door, you might just take every bit of warmth he’s ever known from him—but sitting in front of you, in front of your sorrowed expression and sympathetic eyes….it might be too much heat for him to handle.

“well, you’re the grand sage, and i’m a matra—”

“acting grand sage,” he corrects, “it’s temporary. i’ll be back to being the akademiya’s scribe in a short bit.”

“but people talk,” you insist, “and i’ve worked hard to be a respectable matra, and i wouldn’t want anyone to think i’ve slept my way to the top. plus, the general mahamatra is technically my boss, and he’s very strict—”

“the general mahamatra and i drink at taverns together quite often,” he says pointedly, “he’s well aware of how i feel.”

“you told cyno?” you gasp, shooting him a sharp look, “i asked you specifically not to—”

“he’s known of my feelings before that night,” he assures, “evidently i’m not very subtle.”

“well,” you hum, biting back a smile, “no, you aren’t.”

he raises a brow, tilting his head in confusion. “you’ve known?”

“al-haitham,” you chuckle, eyeing him fondly. something about the way your smile is so bright makes him clutch his pen tighter. “you aren’t the most social, you know. but you always have something to say to me.”

“that doesn’t always mean anything,” he mumbles, blush rising to the tips of his ears.

he’s endearing this way, you decide—when he’s flustered and almost pouting and flushed a bright shade of pink. you think for a second that maybe, if you kiss him for a bit in the comforts of his office, no one will ever have to know.

“but it does, doesn’t it?” you tease.

“and if you’ve indulged it all this time, am i safe to assume it means something to you too?” he asks, raising a brow.

you should say no. sleeping with the grand sage and kissing him in his office and maybe even going on dates and possibly holding hands is hardly a good look—but the scribe….well, maybe the scribe is a different story.

“ask me again when you’re the akademiya’s scribe,” you say, biting back a smile, “perhaps my answer will be different then.”

“i see,” he nods, biting back a smile of his own, “i suppose the grand sage isn’t everyone’s type, huh?”

“no,” you chuckle, “i suppose not. but the scribe….well, he’s rather charming.” you walk up to him, lean down and press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth as you mumble, “i don’t mind waiting for the scribe.”

“well, lucky for you, you won’t have to wait too long,” he hums.

he watches you leave his office—and then he decides that when he clocks out at five pm sharp later, he’ll go straight home, tell kaveh that he is, in fact capable in the field of romance, and demand this month’s rent.

—————

“haitham, we’re out of eggs,” you pout, poking your head out of the fridge, “will you bring some on the way home today?”

“we would have eggs if kaveh didn’t use all of mine,” al-haitham grumbles, glaring at the blonde who gasps in offense. 

“and you help yourself to my beer, don’t you? i deserve a few eggs,” kaveh huffs. 

“well, make sure you pay this month’s rent on time. we’re going to buy some more furniture for our room.”

this time, kaveh turns to you in disbelief—you find it amusing how he seems to still find it improbable that anyone would like to spend longer than five minutes with al-haitham, let alone share a bedroom.

“are you really sure you want to do this? what could you possibly see in him? he’s the most aggravating individual i’ve ever had the pleasure of talking to,” kaveh eyes you in concern as you walk over and press a soft kiss to al-haitham’s forehead, earning himself an unimpressed glare from the scribe and making you giggle. 

“he is a bit aggravating,” you agree with a teasing glint, pinching al-haitham’s cheek as he scoffs, “but i think he’s just nice to me because i sleep with him.”

“that’s gross,” kaveh wrinkles his nose, “you had better not be doing anything i can hear from my room—that would be traumatic. although, it must be more traumatic for you,” he says with sympathy.

“if you don’t like it, you can simply move out,” al-haitham, shrugs, wrapping an arm around your waist. as much as you love your boyfriend—and you love him quite a bit, you can’t help but mourn the fact that constant bickering will now become a staple in your daily routine. 

“are you threatening me?” kaveh gasps before he turns to you with his finger pointing to al-haitham, “do you see? this is your future, i hope you know that. he’s much more unpleasant to live with, i’m warning you in advance—don’t say i didn’t try.”

“well, i’m sure he’ll be on his best behavior for me,” you grin, eyeing al-haitham playfully as your fingers weave into his hair, “otherwise, i’ll have to come sleep in your room when i’m mad at him.”

you think, for the first time ever, kaveh and al-haitham seem to agree on something as they both share a look of dread at your words.

pov: you write 3.8k words of build up for a plot just so you can write the last scene 😭

no bc literally i meant to write this as a drabble just so i could write that last scene bc i thought of it and giggled but then the plot just kept going and now we’re at 4.1k words like w h a t

[m1ckeyb3rry]

i’m so excited for your request event eek!! :DDD if you ever get the time, maybe micheal kaiser, but like post marriage? :O

── AIRPORT VISIT

Synopsis: You pick up your husband from the airport, finally reuniting with him after his long trip abroad.

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Kaiser x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 1.5k

Content Warnings: married couple, lots of banter, talks about insurance??, kaiser hates blue lock but he has to secure the bag i fear 😔, probably ooc because this is an established relationship so he’s kind of sweet…consider it off screen development LMAO

A/N: hello my dear i’m so sorry this took me a sec to respond to!! kaiser is such a funky guy hehe i tried my best writing him in this type of scenario…i hope you like it 💖

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own. now closed!

The airport was colder than you had expected, and you wrapped the sweater you had stolen from Michael’s closet tighter around your shoulders, hiding the lower half of your face in it as you stared at the customs area. Your eyelids were heavy and threatened to droop shut entirely, but you had promised that you would come pick him up, and you didn’t want his first sight of you after almost a month to be you dozing off on your feet.

Shuffling over to a bench and suppressing a yawn when you realized it might still be a bit of time before he came out, you tucked your legs up next to you and leaned your head against the cool white wall beside you. Given the late hour, the airport was all but deserted, or at least as close to deserted as a place so constantly active could be. The steady drone of the air conditioning — which you wished they would turn down! — was mind-numbing, and despite yourself, you thought that it wouldn’t be so bad if you just closed your eyes for a moment. You wouldn’t sleep, you would only rest them so that you appeared cheery and bright when Michael finally arrived…

The next thing you knew, there was a hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently awake. You shot to your feet, panic shooting through you at the thought that you were being attacked or something, but when you realized your ‘assailant’ was none other than your dear husband, who you had spent hours waiting for, you relaxed.

“You should’ve just stayed home,” he said, clicking his tongue at you, reaching out to ruffle your hair. His bags sat by his feet, and yawning, you picked one up. “Hey, is that my sweater?”

“Mhm,” you said as you traipsed towards where you had parked your car. “I like this one. I can’t believe I haven’t taken it before.”

He made a face at you. “Stop stealing my clothes.”

“There’s nothing stopping you from taking my things, if you’re bristling at the unfairness,” you said, unlocking the car and opening the trunk, helping him heft his things into the back to hasten the process.

“No thanks. Your clothes are ugly; that’s why you always have to take mine, right?” he said, pressing the button so that the trunk would shut. You yawned again, blinking your eyes open and shut a few times to clear your vision, shaking your head as you did so.

“You’re the one who buys half of them, so what does that say about your taste?” you said. “Yours are just more comfortable.”

“I can start buying you men’s clothes instead, since you insist on wearing them all of the time,” he said, snatching the keys from out of your pocket and sliding into the driver’s side before you could protest.

“Well, but it’s not the same,” you said. “Also, what are you doing? The whole point of me coming to pick you up was so that you didn’t have to drive and all. Aren’t you tired?”

“I just slept for an entire plane ride,” he said. “I’m as energetic as Ness when he gets his hands on espresso. You, on the other hand, will probably crash this car if you’re allowed to drive it, and then we’d have to deal with insurance, so I’d really prefer it if you just get in the passenger seat and leave this to me, because our agent is a bitch.”

“She’s not that bad,” you said. 

“Every day that I don’t have to call her is a good day,” he said. “Now, are you coming, or should I just leave you here?”

You scoffed even as you ducked into the passenger seat and put on your seatbelt. “You should’ve left me behind. I could’ve caught a ride with Ness. I’m sure he’d be less mean about it.”

“Ha, ha,” Michael said. “That was so funny. Did you recently update my will to make yourself my sole benefactor? Because if so, you’re in luck. I just died. Died of laughter. I’m dead now, which means you’re a rich woman, Mrs. Kaiser.”

“Shut up, you overdramatic oaf,” you said.

“You’re so rude to the man who just made you wealthy,” he said, taking your hand and holding it to his lips as he pulled out of the airport parking lot. “I’m worth more than Ness. Don’t even joke about going with him again. He won’t give you anything when he dies. You’ll be left broke and unhappy.”

“Right, because your net worth is why I agreed to marry you,” you said. “No other reason.”

“That combined with my good looks and my amazing talent, I’m sure,” he said.

“Your humility was only a bonus,” you said. He dropped your hand and shot you a mock glare.

“Just remember who’s in control of this car! What if I crash it? Then you’ll regret everything!” he said.

“You’ll regret it more,” you said. “I’ll make you call the insurance agent.”

“What if I’m on my deathbed?” he said. “What if I’m bleeding out at the scene of the crash? What would you do then, huh?”

“I’d use your phone to call an ambulance, and I’d use mine to call the agent so that you could talk to her while we waited for help to come,” you said.

“Wow,” he muttered. “Cold. We haven’t seen each other in a month and this is how you’re treating me.”

“I did miss you,” you said, resting your temple against the cool glass of the window. “I wish you didn’t have to go all of the way to Japan every year to help out with that program.”

He sighed. “Believe me, if they paid even a dollar less, I wouldn’t. I hate those stupid Blue Lock bastards, and every time I have to interact with them, I lose ten years off of my lifespan. ”

“Oh, no,” you said. “Remind me when you’re about to run out completely. I’ll update your will, just in case.”

“Hilarious,” he deadpanned.

“Really, though, is there anyone you don’t complain about talking to?” you said. “At this rate, you’re not going to have very many years left at all. Will you leave me a widow so soon?”

He gave you a charming grin. “I like talking to you. That’s why I married you.

“Did those Blue Lock boys teach you about this kind of thing alongside soccer?” you said. “I don’t remember you being quite so smooth when you left. Was it Yoichi Isagi? You mentioned him a lot in your texts.”

“Y/N,” Michael said gravely. “I would strip naked, swim in a vat of acid, and then sleep with Don Lorenzo on a bed of nails before I would ever take advice from Isagi.”

“Poor Lorenzo,” you said, laughing at the mental image of what he was describing. “Why’d you throw him under the bus like that?”

“We took the same plane back from Japan,” he explained. “He had a layover here, so you could say he’s just a victim of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Jeez,” you said. “Alright, I get it. You just thought about me so frequently and fondly that you came up with these lines all on your own.”

“Exactly,” he said smugly. “I don’t need stupid Isagi to tell me how to impress you. Only I know how to do that, anyways, so why would I ask someone else for help?”

“Sorry for the suggestion,” you said as he pulled into the garage of our home. “And thank you for driving. If only your flight had been a little bit earlier! I really would have driven you back.”

“Next time,” he said, patting your head as he helped you out of the car. “Or I can call a taxi and you can just stay home from now on, so that neither of us are inconvenienced.”

“I wanted to do something nice for you,” you said with a pout, helping him bring his things inside. He smiled slightly, kissing your forehead with the utmost of delicacy.

“Just you being here is nice enough for me,” he said. “Don’t put yourself through so much trouble, okay? The knowledge that you’re waiting at home for me makes me happier than anything else ever could.”

“Okay,” you said reluctantly. “If you say so.”

“I do,” he said. “Let’s get you to bed now, alright?”

“You, too,” you said.

“I will, but on one condition,” he said.

“What?” you said.

“You take my sweater off,” he said. “It’s mine, seriously!”

“Looks like you’re sleeping on the sofa tonight, then,” you said.

“Y/N,” he whined, wrapping his arms around you and squeezing tightly, resting his chin on your shoulder. “You have me now. Aren’t I much warmer and better than a sweater?”

“Hm,” you said. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“You guess so?” he said. “Fine. I guess I’ll just see myself back to Japan, then.”

“Don’t do that,” you said. “It’s too cold without you here, and lonely, too. I’ll even take the sweater off if you’ll stay.”

“You’re so unfair,” he said. “How am I supposed to say no to you? You can keep the stupid sweater.”

“And you?” you said. He pinched your cheek affectionately.

“I suppose you can keep me, too.”

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

The idea of Lucifer time tracking back to Eden times. He meets Adam and falls in love, seeing and understanding how lonely and abounded Adam felt. He finally understands how much his actions hurt Adam and while he couldn’t intervene due to the possibility of losing Charlie, he tries to make up for it with himself.

Lucifer is able to travel back and forth between Eden and the ‘old hell’ where he begins to rebuild it.

Basically Lucifer becomes Adams friend while his other self is still sneaking around with Lilith.

Adam: you look like lucifer ?

Lucifer: ah, well that’s…I mean, I’m not ‘lucifer’ I’m somebody else.

Adam: why do you look like him then?

Lucifer: all angels are made to have some resemblance between them. For example Michael looks like Lucifer too, does he not?

Adam: yes he does…but lucifer said that’s because their twins and were born from the same star???

Lucifer: that’s right. I’m their elder brother! Yes! I was born before them, that’s why THEY look like me

Adam: oh okay. Then why haven’t Lucifer ever talked about you?

Lucifer: you see Adam…I did something bad

Adam: bad?

Lucifer: hmm. I did something father disapproved off and I was punished for it

Adam: punished?! Are you okay?

Lucifer: oh I’m fine now! Don’t worry about that!

Adam: that’s good. But where were you all this time?

Lucifer: part of my punishment was to be sent somewhere

Adam: where?

Lucifer: a…a place called hell. It is a dangerous place with very bad people.

Adam: and you were to watch over them?

Lucifer: um yes? I am the king of hell

Adam: so what is your name?

Lucifer: you can call me the devil

Adam eagerly tells Lilith and lucifer all about his new friend. At first Lilith is excited about this new Angel while lucifer is bewildered. Eventually they came to the conclusion Adam made ‘the devil’ up and begin to disregard him again. Even the other archangels don’t believe Adam when he talks about devil lucifer . Until one day when Lilith and lucifer are caught by heaven and Lilith is punished for refusing to be the mother of humanity (before eve was supposed to created) Devil Lucifer makes his presence known.

Lucifer: Adam does not need a new wife.

Sera: who…who are you?

Lucifer: why, I’m sure Adam told you y all about me

Michael: I suppose you’re the devil he speaks then?

Lucifer: I suppose so

Michael: leave this place! You are not welcome in Eden!

Lucifer: I am the King of Hell. You are no match for me, Michael.

Sera: what are you intentions with the first man?

Lucifer: he will be my queen.

Afterward the archangels return to heaven, leaving Adam, devil lucifer, archangel lucifer and Lilith still in Eden.

Adam is confused and hurt by everything. He is hurt by Lilith and archangel lucifer, and confused by devil lucifer. He runs away when devil lucifer tries to convince him to leave Eden and come to hell with him. This allows the two lucifers to meet.

Archangel lucifer is jealous and miffed.

Devil lucifer uses this opportunity to insult his old naive and stupid self lol

A rivery sparks between the two while Lilith is extremely confused over everything. Especially when she realises devil lucifer wants Adam, not her.

lol

Now we have a confused and scared Adam

A possessive yandera devil king lucifer

A jealous and second guessing his choices archangel lucifer

A pissed and jealous Lilith

Maybe Adam gets the best of both worlds or maybe he avoids both lucifers and lives his life peacefully in Eden.

Don’t know if eve would be made now. A new man would definitely have to be made due to devil lucifers involvement so eve could be made from the new man or Lilith eventually gets with the new man?

Wow the amount of drama!! I love it!

See, if Lilith and Angel Lucifer slept together already Charlie could still exist.

I think Eve would still be made and another man.

I just want Devil Lucifer and Angel Luicfer to fight over Adam LMAO. Devil Lucifer would feel more entitled to be with Adam I think? Both would be jealous for sure.

Maybe Adam would suggest being with both of them but THEY don't want to share HIM.

[myhaikyuuacademia]

Hi, I know it’s super cliche but I was wondering if I could get a one bed friends to lovers story with Jaime Reyes?

This request made me so happy lmao. I wrote so much for it. Sorry it's late!

How could I not? | Jaime Reyes x reader (Blue Beetle 2023)

Summary: we love one bed. We love a sprinkle of accidental confession. Warning: tired Jaime is clingy. Canon. A/N: I LOVE this lmao tysm

You and Jaime hadn’t been friends for very long when all of the Kord stuff happened, but you didn’t hesitate to offer letting him and his family stay at your apartment while their house was getting fixed. They didn’t end up taking you up on that, since Jenny also offered them their own apartment and they’d rather take that then inconvenience you, but it was a little cramped in that apartment (not that it wouldn’t have been at yours). Jaime complained about it all the time. Especially about how Milagro had been relentlessly teasing and annoying him about stuff. He didn’t specify what. Anyway, that’s how you found yourself on a Sunday evening opening the door to a kinda disheveled looking Jaime. “Oh. Jaime. What’s up?” You moved to the side, letting him enter your apartment. “Ugh.” He groaned. “I haven’t slept properly in ages. Between renovations, hero stuff and my family seemingly being more overbearing than usual, especially in a space so small I can’t escape them, it just. I can’t fucking sleep.” He ranted and then ran a hand over his face and hair. You just chuckled as you closed the door and walked further into your apartment. “So you came here to escape?” You sat down on the couch and looked up at him, standing before you, hesitating for a second whether to sit down or what to do before deciding to do so. “Yeah” He breathed out. “I guess.” You hummed, understandingly. “Well, my doors are always open for you.” Turning towards the tv, you grabbed the remote from your coffee table. “Wanna watch spiderman with me?” Jaime sighed and then grinned, “sure.”

He didn’t last 5 minutes.

You glanced over at him and noticed his closed eyes and deep relaxed breaths. Hesitant, you gave him a nudge, trying to wake him up. The couch, and the way he was sitting right now especially, would give him a sore back and neck if he continued sleeping like this. “Jaime.” You whisper-shouted. Another nudge, “Jaime!”. Groggily he murmured and tried to move out of the way so he could continue his sleep in peace. “Come on Jaime, go to bed.” You tried pulling on his arm to get him to stand up, but he barely moved. Instead he pulled you down, so you landed half on top of him and he buried his head in your neck, while his arms closed around your waist holding you close. You froze and your brain simultaneously short-circuited and erupted into chaos. His breath was warm and even on your skin and his hands so soft on the little bit of exposed skin between your top and pants. He didn’t seem bothered by the position you two found yourselves in, hell, he probably didn’t even notice. You were pretty sure he was immediately and fully asleep again. Meanwhile your heart was still beating as if to escape your chest.

“Jaime.” You tried again after you’ve had a while to compose yourself. “Come on, let’s get you to bed, it’ll be more comfortable.” No success. “Khaji-Da?” Last resort. You heard groaning, and felt Jaime moving ever so slightly. “Come on now, let’s get you to bed. I promise you can continue sleeping in just a second.” Carefully, you tried slipping out of his arms, standing up and holding your hands out in front of you to help him up. With a pout on his lips he looked at you through half-lidded eyes before taking your hands with an overly dramatic movement and you pulled him up rolling your eyes, laughing. You didn’t notice the way he smiled at that. One of his hands still in yours, you led him to your bedroom. “Go. Sleep.” You lightly patted him on his back in a shoving way to get him to go to your bed. Standing in the doorway with your arms crossed you were observing if he was doing what you’re telling him to. He was well on his way when he stopped, as if a sudden thought occurred. “What about you?” He turned around. His voice was raspy, still half-asleep. Your heart was racing again, and your face felt very hot suddenly. “W…” you cleared your throat. “What about me?” “Aren’t you going to sleep?” “Oh. I’ll just sleep on the couch it’s fine. Plus, we didn’t really get that far with the movie, so I can just finish it.” He didn’t seem to like that answer, by the way his brows furrowed and his pout came back. “I’m not stealing your bed and leaving you to sleep on your couch. Especially in your own apartment.” “You need sleep more than I do. It’s fine. Really.” You tried convincing him. A feeling of an old western stare down crept up on you. Like whoever blinked first, lost. “Come on Jaime, just go back to sleep.” You plead, head slightly tilted and puppy-dog-eyes. His eyes narrowed. He was going to strike a deal. Or a compromise. “I’ll only go to sleep if you go. And I’ll only sleep in your bed if you do. Wait that came out wrong.”

“Pffff.” You burst out laughing. Ignoring how flustered his proposal made you. This man was gonna be the death of you some day. “You sure?” you asked jokingly. “Fine, go to bed. I’ll turn off the tv.” You sighed playfully defeated and turned around. Your heart was doing the racy thing again at the thought of sleeping in the same bed as Jaime. You groaned annoyed as you turned off the tv and lights and went back to the bedroom. For a second, you had considered staying in the living room and hoping he’d fallen back asleep, but he was stubborn and you knew that. There was no escape. And as predicted, he was sitting in your bed waiting, watching the door for you to come back. You noticed he was only wearing a t-shirt now, his sweater and pants on the floor next to him and it reminded you that you still had to change into your pajamas. Being around Jaime really saved you a lot of money on blush. You could tell he was watching you as you made your way over to your closet. If you wanted to, you could just go to the living room to change, or the bathroom. The question is, did you want to? Not really. You felt comfortable around Jaime, and you trusted him. And it’s not like you were about to get completely naked. And honestly, he probably might just look away anyway. So you took of your pants first, to put on some shorts, and then your top, to put on a flowy shirt. All the while your back was turned to your bed. You might have heard a “shut up Khaj” from behind you but you weren’t sure. Okay, maybe in hindsight it did make you feel a bit embarrassed and flustered to change in front of him. When you turned around, Jaime was staring at the wall in front of him very intently, and with a very red face.  Pressing your lips together to contain your facial expression you made your way over to the other side of the bed. “Happy now?” You asked as you sat down next to him, pulling the blanket on top of you. “uhuh.. hmm. Yeah” He was still looking straight ahead and avoiding your eyes. “Jaime.” You called out softly. This made his head turn. “Go to sleep.” You grinned. He only rolled his eyes in response and shook his head in mock-exasperation. But for some reason you couldn’t move your eyes, or stop your lips from smiling, and you kept looking at him. At his pretty, pretty face, with his soft, soft hair. His lips, that had been breathing into your neck just minutes earlier. His beautiful brown eyes that you found staring back at yours. In just a second, a tension had built up and the energy in the room completely changed. You licked your lips nervously.  What now? Neither of you dared to move. You weren’t even sure if you were breathing at this point. You felt the urge to say something, but you didn’t know what. Your mind was wiped completely empty. Jaime’s eyes were the first to flicker down to your lips.

And then his phone made a sound. You almost jumped apart, and he dizzily looked you up and down before turning around to grab his phone. His attention elsewhere and his eyes no longer on you, you remembered to breathe. Turning to face away from him, instead facing the wall he had been looking at so meticulously earlier you glid down so you were no longer sitting and let your covers almost swallow you whole. As if they could protect you from the fire you felt inside. You heard him setting his phone down again, and the rustling of the duvet when he laid down as well. You felt him looking at you. Did you dare look at him?

No.

“Good night, y/n.”

Only then you glanced over at him. “Good night Jaime.” You whispered, before looking back up at the ceiling.

By the sound of his breathing, he fell asleep soon after. Something you were, so very far away from at this moment. Your whole body was tense and your mind was going a mile a minute. You were acutely aware of his presence, his face just a couple inches to your side. There was no way you could calm down enough to fall asleep with him in your bed, next to you. You turned to face away from him, hoping it’d give you some sense of distance between you two. After some brainstorming you figured your best bet was to sneak out on to the couch once you were sure it wouldn’t wake him up. Well, that’s what you would’ve done, if you weren’t suddenly wrapped in Jaime’s arms literal seconds before you would have tried sneaking out. “Stay.” He murmured sleepily, face buried in your back. “Wh..” slipped out of your mouth as you tensed up, caught off-guard. “Khaj.” He answered your unspoken question, his hands around your waist. You had two choices. Give in, or not. You gave in.

Surprising how fast you can fall asleep when you’re in the arms of someone you l- When you’re in the arms of someone. Period.

You woke up still in his arms, and it made you feel all warm inside. Though, face-to-face now, with your face buried in his neck for a change. “Morning.” His voice was hoarse, though it sounded liked he had been for a while already. You didn’t feel like talking yet, so you just wrapped your arms around him tighter and buried your face in his shoulders more. Suddenly shy. One of his hands moved from your back to stroke your hair. This, you thought, is a moment you wished you could stay in forever. “You want some breakfast?” Jaime asked. “mmhm” you declined. “I only want to stay in bed with you.” He chuckled at that and started playing with your hair, wrapping strands around his fingers. “And to think just a few hours ago you tried to sneak out.” He teased. Your face scrunched up. “hmmh” you mumbled, “well, I changed my mind. Now you have to come over every night so I can fall asleep.” You weren’t completely serious when you said it, but Jaime just replied with a “Deal.” There was a content silence after this. He continued playing with your hair and you continued holding him. “Do you think trees get sad when their leaves fall off?” This came completely unprompted and so sudden it made you laugh. “Jaime what the fuck.” You pulled away to look at him, amused. He looked at you so full of love your brain stuttered. “I…” You trailed off. “No. If they’re capable of enough thought to be sad about it, I think they know the leaves will come back.” “But they won’t be the same leaves.” His fingers that were weaving through your hair before now began tracing invisible patterns on your skin. “Do you get sad when you get a haircut? I imagine it’s the same way.” You replied sincerely. He seemed to think about it before his face scrunched up. “I’d be sad if I got a buzzcut yeah.” You burst out laughing. After you calmed down you started running one of your hands through his hair. “I’d be sad if you got a buzzcut, too.” But I’d still love you.

“But I’d still love you.”

You didn’t even notice you said it out loud, the thought itself stunned you and made your hand stop playing with his hair for a second before you managed to get it moving again. You completely forgot about your face, so the shock was still seared into it. Eyes wide, looking at your hand in his hair, focusing on it, as if combing through his hair was the most difficult thing to do, just so you didn’t have to look into his eyes.

“You love me?”

Your hands halted and your eyes met his. “What?”

“You… love me?” he repeated in the same soft and unbelieving voice, barely above a whisper.

“What?” you felt like a broken record.

“You said you would still love me.”

“Oh.”

Oh.

In a way this situation was like the one yesterday, before his phone went off. Both of you staring at each other, not saying a word. But the energy was so different. He was waiting for you to say something, it seemed, to confirm or deny, but you didn’t know what to say. There are two wolves inside of you. So you stayed completely frozen instead. There was no phone ‘ding’ to save you this time. It was getting uncomfortable, neither of you saying anything. Your fight or flight instinct was begging for you to run. Instead, almost out of your control, your mouth opened, as if to say something. But then you remembered you had no idea what to say. “yes.” Oh. I guess we’re going with that. This seemed to break you out of your spell, you turned around, out of his arms, out of the bed, you got up. “Sorry.” “What? Why are you apologizing?” Jaime asked. Your back turned towards him you heard him move. Flight was kicking in, and you were well on your way out the bedroom when he managed to grab your arm and keep you from moving further away. “I love you!”

You stood still. Then you turned around. “I love you too.” Jaime said again, this time adding the ‘too’. “So you don’t have to apologize.” It was a little funny, if you were honest. The way he was half kneeling on your bed half standing on the floor, holding your wrist and telling you he loved you in just his shirt and underwear. “You do?” “Yeah. Of course. Of course I do, how could I not?” He said it so earnestly, it made you want to laugh because he was still in that weird position. “You do.” No longer a question. You stepped closer with a smile. “You love me.” Grinning now. “You love me.” He just repeated. Spiderman pointing meme. You nod. And then you kiss him.

[kcalsforhim]

˖⋆࿐໋ saturday 21st of december

⋆˙⟡

i woke up very late yesterday i remember it… and i didn’t do much of anything either. i stayed in bed all day getting to enjoy my days off finally… its winter break… finally… finally !!!

i seriously didn’t do much, like im so fr… i didn’t even leave my house haha… i originally intended to clean my room this day but i had no energy

i weighed in one last time untill i would try to go really long without weighing in cause ;; i haven’t been so consistent and i haven’t been doing so well… soo… yeah 48.3… lets see a lower number next time. i banned myself from online shopping untill i get to my next goal sigh 😭 i think i also got paid today or the day before so i sent a salty email to whoever was harassing me about some bills i still owed

omad (somehow) :

5 chevape ! lots of zucchini, like a lot of them.. onion for my chevape but.. i didn’t eat much of that. garlic sauce for my chevape. my side was some mashed potatoes

a very flat square of brownie i made out of some package.. i think i fucked it up cause it was so flat

cals : 448

chevape was yummy, i actually went down and helped my mom with cooking, idk why.. she was frying the zucchini and i was making the mashed potatoes and brownie. i barely added butter and milk, just enough for it to form, so i felt pretty safe eating it. i also helped my mom yield the zucchini better since they were way too oily..

the brownie was very good, nice and sweet and tasted good…

after this a while later i ended up crying cauuuuse my dad bought me a lot of muller milk, i don’t know if you know what that is, but it’s basically a very good milkshake kind of drink… i used to really love it when i was fat, maybe 1-2 of those drinks DAILY, i loved it so much. i have not had it in forever and if i do crave something like this i’d rather buy a protein shake of the same flavour

i cried cause i couldn’t have it and i was so triggered and i just cried a lot untill i felt better, but im glad i didn’t end up having it straight up. im still proud of myself for not caving in… we have like 5 guys what am i even supposed to do with that ??? lmao

i hung out with eli after dinner we just called and talked about ocs and i started coding one of the profiles for one of them and i made some quick art for him… i slept really bad at night tho, i get so overstimulated recently ? i can’t explain it.. i need some kind of stimulation detox atp cause im on the phone so much and i just need to clear my head…

also ! i keep forgetting, but thank you for all the followers ! by now im above 50, maybe somewhere around 70 people tuning in… i have a lot of followers on twt (about 900…)so im used to it there, but on here it feels more personal since this is basically my diary… thank you to alll the people tuning in daily to read what i write <3 i appreciate it so much

total cals : 448

total steps : n.v.t

music that reminds me of oc i talked about a second ago ehe

⋆˙⟡

[lovelyiida]

hii!! i just found ur blog (rlly cute theme btw) and I wanted to submit a fluff or smut (or both idk) letter w bakugo please

hope u have a good day or night and remember to rest ☺️

@esloao requests: could you do both letters involving bakugo when he miss reader while they're separated?

YOU WON'T EVEN BELIEVE THIS BECAUSE I DON'T EVEN BELIEVE THIS but this is the first smut that I’ve ever written LMAO.

INCLUDES: PRO-HERO BAKUGO X fem CIVILIAN READER

WARNINGS: vulgar language, implied fem reader, smut, fluff

FLUFF! WHEN PRO-HERO BAKUGO AND YOU ARE SEPARATED it feels as if all odds are against you. The days pass, each one longer than the other. You felt as if another part of you was missing from your soul, and the rest of you was functioning on autopilot— no one told you how hard it is to date a pro-hero…

Let alone that pro-hero being the #2 ranked hero in the country.

Depending on the urgency of the mission, Bakugo would regularly call you. Around two-three times a day. One in the morning, one at work, and one at night.

Your co-workers would see how you beamed at your phone when the call log showed your boyfriend's name. A light squeal would slip from your mouth as your scurry away from your post to answer the phone call.

Most of the phone conversations would consist of your boyfriend asking you if you slept/ate well. And if you haven’t done any of those things he’ll cuss you out immediately.

Or when you’d tell him how your day was, telling him how stressful work was. He’d tell you you get some rest…knowing you won’t but it’s the thought that counts.

Sometimes, most of the phone calls are of you just being nosy— you regularly ask your boyfriend what he’s doing for his mission, regardless of how “top secret” the mission was supposed to be.

“What? So you go to the area to find no hostages and it was all a false call?” You say, confused and irritated at the news your partner tells you.

“Can’t fuckin’ believe the top agency, left my girl all alone at home for a week! Just for this bullshit,” your boyfriend snarled. You become warm at his sweet undertone of words.

“I mean- this is a high school level scenario, I swear we must be getting punked–“

“Does this mean you’re coming home early?” You coo. This makes Bakugo chuckle on the other line.

“Yes baby, hold your horses I’ll be there later.”

SMUT! WHEN PRO-HERO BAKUGO AND YOU ARE SEPARATED things can get carried away when you finally see each other again.

You sit on the couch, waiting impatiently, staring— burning holes into the front door of your shared home. You missed him so much, you needed him so bad.

Not to get sentimental, but every day you spend with him feels like your last. Dating a pro-hero takes mental strength. Knowing that the person you wake up next to might not make it to kiss you goodnight is heartbreaking to think about.

It was a harsh ideology to accept, and you still haven’t accepted it.

So every time you hear those keys jingle, and every time you watch that door open to see your loving boyfriends' amber eyes shoot around the room to be met with yours. You immediately jump at him, holding onto him like if you looked away for one mere second he’d disappear.

And every. single. time. your boyfriend comes home, this leads to the best sex you’ve ever had.

Legs hitched behind your head as your loving boyfriend pounds into you, each thrust burning so lustfully.

Sweat dripping from his forehead and onto yours, your loud breathy moans, and his heavy grunts filled the room like a thick fog.

There was no time for words, only action.

His eyes looked into yours, staring into your tear-glazed eyes and through to your soul. His hands clawed onto the back of your thighs, deep moans with each thrust.

Your arms shakily wrapped around his neck, nails digging deep into his scalp as you loudly moan, sloppily thrusting your hips forward for more pleasure.

“Y’missed me, baby?” He growled the loud slaps of your skin against his acting as beats of silence, which only makes you shiver.

“Y-yes,” you whimpered, licking your dry lips you try your best you look at him, but your eyes roll back and shut as you let out another wanton moan.

“You missed taking my dick didn’t ya?” Bakugo leans down, applying more pressure to your legs. Now his hard thrusts slow into his pelvis slowly rolling into your wetness.

Your eyes shoot open, you squeal as your boyfriend hits those bundles of nerves he knew he needed to hit. Letting out a gasp, your arms shoot from his neck and start to crawl at his back.

“Mhm!” You shake your head rapidly, as all you hear is the heavy breathing between the two of you.

“Mm thought so” Bakugo growls in your ear. Your boyfriend continues to roll his hips, hitting your g-spot repeatedly.

“Y-y’know, every fuckin time I leave here…all I think about is you and my pussy” He says.

My?

The simple word that left his mouth makes you clench so hard— it makes the both of you breathless, you hear your boyfriend let out a loud moan.

“Shit, you like that? You like your pussy only belonging to me, honey?” He moans, you couldn’t even speak anymore.

“You like knowing that this is my pussy and only mines? You love how I make my pussy feel s’good?” He growls in your ear, he stops his grinding only to reposition himself. Growling, he slowly pulls out—soon slamming his length back in.

This makes you scream out.

“Katsuki!” Tears stream down your face, the makeup you put on today melting off with ease.

Now, every thrust was rough with no intention of stopping.

“Fuck, Y/n!” He whimpers, head touching yours as he sloppily peppers kisses all over your face.

“Katsuki I’m gonna f’kin…cum,” eyes rolling back as your head slams onto the soft pillow.

“Yeah? Your gonna cum using your dick?” He whispers, eyes rolling back as he nears his end as well.

“Yes, I’m gonna cum using my dick” you moan out. Bakugo lets out a half-chuckle, reaching down to caress your face with his warm hands. He places a warm, soft kiss on your lips.

Looking at his face, you notice that he was teary-eyed as well. The eyeliner he used for his hero work smears as tears trickle down his cheeks.

“I love y-you,” Bakugo breathes out. This makes your breath hitch.

Bakugo is the type to rarely say those three words. He doesn’t take these words lightly. So you knew that when he meant it, he meant it.

“I love you too, Katsuki” you whimper giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. Soon taking a hand from his back to caress his face.

You knew that you saying his first name was his weak spot. As you could tell by the way his hips stuttered and his eyes slowly roll back in ecstasy.

“I’m cummin, fuck!”

Bakugo soon thrusts at a lethal pace, the only sound in the room was the slapping of your skin. As the both of you reach climax, orgasming hard and silent.

Time goes by as Bakugo collapses on top of you, bodies rising and falling as the only sounds are the pace of your slow breaths. You hold on tight to Bakugo, tears still streaming down your face as you revel in the moment.

You missed Katsuki, and he missed you too.

RRAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! FIRST SMUT EVER LETS GO

I hope you liked this, I’m sorry if it’s cringey but I thought I did good, please let me know how I did or this will loom over my existence for the rest of my life :)

— lovelyiida ❤︎︎

[eddiemunching]

I need some enemies to lovers type but it happens during hate sex, loosely based off of a friends with benefits relationship.

It’s very heavily just Eddie and reader speaking angrily towards each other with sex happening in the background lmao. NOT PROOFREAD IM SORRY

Warnings: 18+ !!!! swearing, slut shaming, degrading, hate sex, Eddie is kind of mean sorry but he makes up for it, unprotected sex!

The Start Of Something - Eddie x Reader

Eddie made sure to give you hell. Reminding you that no one else could do this for you like he could. Punctuating the fact that, despite you coming to him to make yourself feel better, he could use you back. Mumbling many curses and praises while still pounding roughly into you.

“I wonder who taught you how to take dick so well.” Eddie chuckled softly. “I’d love to pat him on the back”

All you could do is respond with pants and muffled whimpers, attempting to push back against Eddie with shaking legs. “I’m so glad I found a way to shut you up, it’s a nice break from listening to your snarky comments.” Eddie hovered above your ear.

“You’re talking too much.” You mustered out in between deep breaths.

“I can tell you’re enjoying this.” He grunted into your skin. “I feel you tighten up every time a word leaves my lips, you slut.”

“I’m-m not a slut.” You spat out. “Fuck you.”

“Yeah?” He chuckled. “How do you explain the threesome we had with Steve. You took two dicks and still wanted more.”

“I just like to keep busy.” You replied, pushing your ass back against Eddie to match his pace.

“Is that what you tell Steve every time you sneak back to me?”

“It’s not like he’s my boyfriend — or you.” You stop. “I can do what I want.”

“So you’re just gonna find someone to fuck every time you get heartbroken.”

“You’re lucky you were available when I needed it.” Smacking sounds are the only background to the heated conversation, echoing loudly behind your harsh words. “I talk to plenty of guys.”

“No one’s doing it like me, sweetheart.” Eddie barks back. “There’s a reason you still come here while you’re dating one of those guys you talk to.”

“Do you want me to regret coming here, the only pussy you can get?” You pretended to move out of the position you were currently in, chest pressed to the bed and your hips held in place by Eddie’s rough hands. “I’m sure Steve, or maybe even Billy, would come pick me up if I asked.”

Eddie’s grip on your hips tightened at the mention of the other men he knew you were very familiar with. “You better hope, for your sakes, your future husband is okay with whoring you out like this. I know you’d die without all the extra attention fucking multiple men gives you.”

“I know I’m your dream girl, Munson.” You string out his name with a teasing tone. “Wanna know a secret?”

“Enlighten me.”

“You’re the only one I’ve been with in the past six months.” You lifted your head up. “I never even slept with Billy, it was a stupid rumor. Steve is cute but he’s too nice and gentle.”

“We both know gentle isn’t your scene.” He makes sure to pull you flush against his skin, in the deepest position possible. “It’s a shame you’re just a toy to me.”

You knew he was winding you up, getting you flustered enough to admit even more revealing secrets that he would use against you next time. “If that’s the case, why haven’t you dated anyone?”

He stopped his movements altogether, still inside you. “What?”

“You can’t seem to find a girlfriend.” You said, turning your head to meet Eddie’s eyes with your own. “Why is that?”

“You think I have time when you’re constantly on my ass begging to be fucked all the time?”

“I don’t think that’s the real reason.” You pull yourself off of Eddie slowly, maintaining eye contact. Pushing him on his back, you climb on his thighs to straddle him before letting him sink in again. “You like me, right?”

“How can I like a slut like you?” He seethed through his teeth. “You’re not exactly girlfriend material.”

“Are you saying guys won’t like me because I’m used?” You said, still riding him at a slow pace.

“Exactly, what do you think slut means.” He grinned at you.

“If I recall correctly.” You paused. “You did this to me.”

“Yeah?” He continued to smile. “I ruined you?”

His hands fell to your waist, moving you faster and putting himself back in control. “You fuck me too good, can’t go to anyone else.”

Satisfied with your answer, Eddie moved his hands to your face, gently moving hair out of your eyes and forehead. “I’m glad only I get to see tears running down your pretty face.” He said, finishing deep inside of you with no warning.

“You think I’m pretty?” You asked curiously as Eddie cleaned you up with a soft towel, patting your sweat up and mess up.

“You’re the prettiest.” He said fixing your hair. “Always have been.”

[joshusten]

love me in spite (guy/honey, redacted audios)

Guy and Honey get into an argument early into their relationship.

(angst, hurt/comfort, arguments, fluff)

3k+ words [ao3 link here!] [masterlist]

[CW and notes: swearing, arguing, insecurities, overthinking, breakdowns, descriptive?? crying?? I think??, idk they’re both having a bad time. probably a lot of grammatical errors lmao. also honey is implied to be empowered!!]

Honey doesn't remember the last time they felt like this, but they’ve always known their personality would bite them in the ass someday.

“Aww, is my beloved mad again? Oh, pray tell, which heinous crime did I commit this time, officer? Robbery? Public indecency?” Guy stroked his chin, pretending to rack up his mind on any possible offense he could have made. “Hm…jaywalking?"

“Guy.”

“Oh! Or maybe—just maybe—it was wanting my ever-so-affectionate lover to stop their pretty head from fussing over me?”

"Guy, can’t you take this seriously for once?” 

“But I am! It’s just not that big of a deal, baby! Look, a manuscript can’t just write itself, y’know? Especially one with a little flair from yours truly!”

“You haven’t slept properly for days now, you work overnight most of the time, and on your days off you pull all-nighters writing!” 

“Oh, you’re one to talk!”

“Well, this one’s more serious! I haven’t even seen you eat a proper meal and anything I offer you gets left out cold!”

They continued to have a back-and-forth confrontation, voices raising and words getting crueler as time goes on, with both parties not intending to back down anytime soon. Honey thought it was the first time they ever heard Guy let out an actual annoyed scoff and they noticed the slightest change in his demeanor. 

“Jesus, Honey. Of all the times you can finally act like you care for me, why now? Hm?” There was a playful smile on his face. It almost made them believe he was still joking around but his words were laced with an unmistakable annoyance.

But something inside Honey snapped. Their chest tightened at the thought of their partner thinking they didn’t care. They felt themselves flinch from the comment and Guy seemed to notice that too as his smile drops. “Shit. Honey, I didn’t–”

“I’m–,” They scrambled to get their bag, keys, wallet, anything they would need because they just want to be anywhere but here.“I’m going out. Let’s finish this later. I-I just can’t fucking do this right now.”

They didn’t mean that. Didn’t mean for it to sound so harsh. Then again, they don’t mean to sound so harsh most of the time but end up doing so either way. Grumpy. Mean. Intimidating. A common descriptor from most people. But Guy wasn’t like most people. ‘Unless,’ they think, ‘That was just a lie you told yourself to believe in.’

Honey shuts the door behind them, leaving the building and the warmth of their partner.

The pain in their chest almost distracts them from the exhaustion currently catching up to their body after a long day. They can feel the telltale signs of a migraine coming as they rub their temples gingerly with one hand, the other guiding the steering wheel. ‘Damn, it started to rain too. What a great way to lighten the mood,’ they think bitterly. Their mind eventually goes back to the fight earlier.

“Of all the times you finally can act like you care for me, why now? Hm?”

They do care. They care for him so much it scares them . He knows that, right? Even if they groan at his flirtatious quips and innuendos or if they grumble at his (very creative) attempts to give them as many hugs and kisses as they would allow, he knows that that’s just how they are, right? 

Maybe that wasn’t enough anymore. Maybe that never was enough to begin with. Maybe Guy finally realized he deserves better than an ill-tempered partner who doesn’t even know how to properly show any affection to their own fucking boyfriend.

A sharp car horn snaps them out of their thoughts. Shit, it’s a green light. They continue to drive until they see the familiar soft glow of a nearby 7-Eleven sign despite the persistent rain. 

Honey's entrance was signaled with the chime of the bell above the glass door. It’s relatively empty save for what they recognize to be a few D.A.M.N. students buying some late-night study snacks. Walking through the aisles while the pop song they heard their partner hum before softly plays in the background, slowly but surely calming them down. Muscle memory makes Honey reach for Guy’s favorite snack and they wonder how he’s doing. 

---

Guy doesn't remember the last time he felt like this, but he’s always known his personality would bite him in the ass someday.

Sure, he and Honey had their disagreements, but they were all accompanied by playful slaps and teasing laughter. Never had it gotten to the point of an actual argument that caused them to spit such venom toward each other like the one they just had. 

“I’m going out. I-I just can’t fucking do this right now.”

The door closes and Honey leaves, bringing the warmth of their shared apartment with them. Guy lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and starts to get to work. He wordlessly distracts himself by cleaning the living room—picking up stray plastic chip bags, vacuuming crumbs that settled on the cheap shag carpet, and fixing up the pillows on the couch that he’s been nesting on for the past few days while he works on the final draft of the project he was writing. 

Piles of paper littered their second-hand coffee table. Every inch is covered in Post-it notes and wrinkled pieces of paper filled with ideas that he had haphazardly scribbled in an attempt to record them before it leaves his mind. Most of them, he recalls, are just random doodles of spirals and honeybees that he absentmindedly drew as he was typing away on his laptop. The spaces left exposed on the table were adorned with faded mug rings on the old dark oak wood.

He tries to compile them into a neater collection, pausing as he notices a doodle he made of his Honey. It was far from a masterpiece, but the cute cartoony style paired with heavily exaggerated furrowed brows in order to replicate their partner’s usual expression pulls a smile from his lips. There was even a jumbled-up line inside a small text bubble next to it to symbolize the adorable grumbles they always make. 

Fuck, he misses them so fucking much.

A sudden wave of exhaustion almost makes him drop the stack of papers he’s holding and it dawns on him how much he really has been neglecting his own health for this project. The stress of trying to find a job where he can utilize his degree and finally get out of that godforsaken pizza place has been taking a toll on him. All Honey was trying to do was for him to take a break that he so desperately ( and, he embarrassingly admits, unknowingly ) needed. And he just treated it like some silly joke. Granted, it really was because he wasn’t used to being coddled after, but, it definitely wasn’t an excuse to dismiss their worries like that. 

The guilt builds up in Guy’s throat like bile. He feels worse now, especially considering how much they struggle with expressing themselves like that to him in general, even if they don’t say it aloud.

He finishes cleaning up but the restlessness doesn’t leave him as time passes by with no word from his partner. Maybe this is it? Maybe he fucked it all up like always? Maybe they finally came to their senses and got fed up with him. It wasn’t uncommon for people to think he was a bit too much. Too chaotic, too irritating, too overwhelming. He ever minded those comments in the first place, but the thought of Honey possibly thinking like that too makes him sick. 

It’s getting late and he can hear the rain outside get louder. The anxiety that has been settling in their stomach flares up. He reaches for his phone to message them before concluding they might not want to be bothered right now. Shit, he’s feeling a little sluggish. 

Guy begrudgingly trudges to the wardrobe of their shared bedroom to get a change of clothes. He glances over as he pulls a familiar-looking hoodie from the hanger. Their double bed, adorned with a pizza plushie that Honey had given to him as a joke gift, was more inviting than usual. Maybe he should just take a rest and go to sleep. 

No, no, no, they might want some space from that too. Guy wants to talk this out with them instead of sleeping it out. If this persists, he isn't sure how his poor heart could take it. He ultimately decides to go back to the couch, stay up, and (at the very least) greet them when they come back. 

If they come back. God, please come back.

What if they don’t?

The thought felt like a mere whisper in his head but it left him numb. Guy's aware of his tendency to overthink but before he knew it, he was lying down on his side, hand clamped to his mouth as he forced his eyes shut. He lets out a quiet sniff. His breath hitches. Then he hears himself choke out a small sob. 

Then another.

And another. 

And another.

The dam breaks, his eyes water and he heaves as much air as he can into his lungs. It suddenly became a struggle to breathe and it definitely became a struggle to calm the ugly thoughts that plague his mind. Shaky, broken sobs fill the room, he cringes at how pathetic it sounds.  He hates this. He hates this feeling. Just come back, I’m sorry.

After what felt like hours, his sniffles slowly died down. With heavy eyes and a heavier heart, he finds himself drowsy from all the crying. The hot tears streaming down his face had begun to dry, but, the warmth on his cheeks reminds him of his Honey and the thought of them finally lulls him to sleep.

---

Honey returns, a little haggard but with a calmer mind. The drive around Dahlia and their quick run to the local convenience store definitely helped lighten their mood but the guilt still followed them around like a shadow. Shaky hands find their way to the lock of their shared apartment and Honey opens to a dim living room, with the forgotten hanging bulbs from the kitchen barely providing a sense of light. They noticed the place was tidier than they remembered.

It was eerily quiet, as well. The wrinkling sound of the paper bag that they were holding filled the room.

"Guy?" Fuck, they can hear their voice getting wobbly. 

"I'm home. You there?" A shift from the room was all they heard accompanied by a sniffle. Honey suddenly becomes hyper-aware of the soft snores matching the rise and fall of a figure on the couch.

They couldn't really explain why their heart started to pound with their pulsating headache. Why they made a beeline inside their apartment. Why they started to get down on their knees in the living room despite the protests of their tired body. Why their chest sank deeper as they saw their partner all bundled up on their battered couch. 

They don't miss the frown on his face and his tear-stained cheeks.

Fuck. Tears? Guy was crying? 

Honey quietly (urgently) sets down the paper bag from their grasp and slowly places a hand on his shoulder, patting it ever so gently.

"H-hey? Guy, what are you doing over here?" They noticed how cold they felt to the touch and remembered their thermostat wasn't working that well. "It's freezing. You're freezing. "

After a few gentle pats and caresses (and reminders of how it's cold here, the bed is warm. Take it, please. ) Guy manages to blearily open his eyes, rubbing away the sleepiness and the few tears that managed to slip.

Cute. His eyes are so cute. Honey would have thought if their mind wasn't filled with thoughts and questions. Why was he sleeping on the couch? Was he waiting for me? He didn't need to do that. Why was he crying? Did he cry himself to sleep? Was it because of me?

Did I do this?

"Honey?" Guy's voice croaked and Honey's heart aches after hearing how hoarse it was. It aches a little more to see him smile at them despite the argument they had earlier.

"You're back…" he mumbles, slightly adjusting his body to prop himself up with his arm. He was wearing their hoodie again.

"Guy, why are you sleeping here? It's cold," they repeated, the worry in their tone becoming more and more evident. 

This had Guy fully sitting up, giving his full attention to their Honey with a slight grin that was preparing to give out a smug reply before dropping his smile and deciding otherwise. If he noticed that their eyes were starting to get just as glassy as his, he didn't mention it. “I-I mean, you’re…mad, right? I thought you’d want some more space from me or something…” 

“N-no! I mean, yeah, thank you for that but that doesn't—” Honey cuts themselves off with a groan. Why can’t I just say what I want to say? What do I even want to say? Guy immediately notices their partner’s frustration and sits down beside them.

“Hey, hey, it's okay. You’re okay, Honey,” he says with a reassuring smile and slowly raises his hand near their cheek, “Can I touch?” 

Honey immediately nods, almost melting at Guy’s warm hands. The familiar calluses from working countless graveyard shifts and delivery jobs all over Dahlia for Max’s kept them grounded. They notice a newly formed bump on the ring finger of his dominant hand from the number of handwritten notes he’s been doing recently.

After a few moments of soft breaths and the sound of Guy's rough thumb gently gliding across their cheek, Honey let out a weak laugh but the words that followed were by no means a joke to them. “You’re so good for me.” Too good. I don’t deserve you. 

It was Guy’s turn to let out a confused chuckle. He felt anything but good to them at the moment.

“What do you mean by that, hon?” He caresses their cheek and he forgets how much his chest hurts when his Honey leans into his touch. “Hey, c’mon. Do you…do you wanna talk about what happened?”

Honey nods once more. "I'm…I'm sorry," they choke out as if the words got caught up in their throat. Everything was overwhelming again. The sound of the remains of the rain, the ticks of the wall clock, and most of all, Guy's unwavering attention to them. They avoid his gaze. 

"I know that…I'm…I dont have the most…pleasant attitude," The nervousness in their tone was obvious but the quick squeeze of their hand from their partner was enough for them to go on. "And I know that you didn’t mean that. About me…not caring,” They felt him give another squeeze, a bit tighter than the last. “Fuck, god knows you’ve put up with me long enough for me to know you wouldn’t mean that.” 

Honey manages to finally look him in his eyes again, they think it's their favorite color. “I…I just don’t know why I act like this. Why can't I just…care for you in a normal way.”

“Oh, Honey…” 

“I’m just so fucking sorry. I really, really care for you, please know that,” they sob out. Guy thinks he’s never seen them this vulnerable. His arms slowly circle and stop around their body as if he was waiting for their permission but Honey beats them to the embrace, burying their head on his chest. He knows they can hear his heart speed up.

“Hey, I know, I know,” The hands that were once on his partner's cheeks find their way to their back, rubbing circles and tracing shapes. “I’m really sorry for what I said too. The stress from work and writing these past few days is catching up but please don’t let that ever be an excuse for me to talk like that, especially to you and especially if it makes you think of all these lies.”

“And all this talk about…caring for me in the ‘normal’ way. Don’t say that.” Guy slowly pulls away to tilt his partner's chin up for their eyes to meet again. The way his Honey looked so distressed was a sight he decided he never wants to see again. “What matters is that I know you care and I want you to know that the way you show it is… fuck, I’ve never felt so cared for like this until you, Honey. Okay?”

“I’ll work…on not neglecting my health too. If it weren’t for you, I might’ve actually collapsed from exhaustion,” he adds, lips upturned into a sheepish smile. “So, thank you.”

Guy isn’t prepared for the way their Honey finally graced him with a soft smile. He’s had them laugh and grin at his…eccentric behavior before, but this smile held so much fondness and sincerity (directed towards him of all people! ) that made this moment all the more intimate. 

I think I'm gonna have a fucking heart attack. He doesn't recall having butterflies for lunch but he definitely feels them flutter up and about in his ribcage. He wants to treasure this moment. He wants to treasure them.

Honey looks down, uncharacteristically flustered and Guy’s heart soars again. “Thank you,” they whispered. “For that.”

“Of course, Honey. Though, I must say,” he grins. “Although your methods of conveying your love for me are a bit… unconventional , you could say I’m on the more bizarre side, too. I guess we make a perfect match after all then, don't we?”

Honey snorts, a reaction that's endearingly familiar to him and he smirks even wider. “You’re so fucking stupid.”

“Well, for the record, if anybody here is fucking stupid, it would be you!” Guy shoots back, “Hi, hello, I’m stupid, by the way, ehh– Ow, ow, ow!”

The pair continues to laugh and banter at each other like before, but, as they comfortably settle down to cuddle on the couch, they both don’t miss the way the grip on their entangled hands tightened for the slightest bit.

---

hope you enjoyed!! please let me know if i had any mistakes or just some feedback in general!! i kinda wanna continue doing these kinda stuff :DD

[metallicaislife]

The Unintentional Heartbreaker

A/N: I think this was funnier in my head lmao and I suck at endings 🥲

Genre: Comedy, fluff

Word Count: 559

Warnings: Mentions of sex but no smut, swearing

I sat on my couch flipping through the latest edition of Kerrang!. I finally found an article that interests me and started to read. 

“What’s up motherfucker?” The voice of my friend, Slash, said breaking my concentration on reading. I looked up and watched as he strode into my living room and plopped down on the loveseat. 

“What’s up, yourself?” I asked closing my magazine.

“Every time I show up you’re curled up on the couch with a magazine or a book, do you ever go out or do anything?” He asked. 

“Yeah, otherwise I wouldn’t have met you.” I answered. 

“Other than concerts.” He countered. 

“No…” I replied. He chuckled. 

“I bet you’ve never gotten laid. Can’t do that if you’re holed up in your house and only go out to concerts with your resting bitch face, don’t talk to me aura.” He teased me. 

“I’ve had sex. In fact I was sleeping with the same guy for a year and half.” I said. 

“Yeah right.” He rolled his eyes with a laugh. 

“No, for real. He’s my friend, and we were both virgins. We decided we didn’t want to be virgins so we started sleeping together to learn. It was just supposed to be a few times to get the gist of it, but then it just kept going.” I explained. Slash gazed at me curiously. 

“Why’d you stop?” He asked. 

“One night he called me, and he told me he had the opportunity to sleep with someone.” I answered. 

“Well, what did you say?” He moved forward leaning his elbows on his knees. 

“The whole point of him and I sleeping together was to get decent at it so when the opportunity came we weren’t bad at sex or learning with a stranger. So I told him to go for it. We haven’t slept together or talked about it since.” I said leaning back against the couch. 

“You still see him though?” He asked.

“Yeah, he’s one of my best friends.” I replied.

“He was totally in love with you.” He said. 

“No he wasn’t.” I said my face contorting in confusion, “why would you think that?” 

“I bet he called you to see if you would hesitate or give any indication you felt the same way.” He said decisively. 

“No way!” I said folding my arms. 

“Look, Y/N, I don’t care how close we are. If we’re having a ‘no strings attached’ arrangement, I’m not going to call and tell you that I have the opportunity to sleep with someone.” Slash said matter-of-factly. 

My eyes widened as the realization hit. Slash began laughing loudly. 

“Oh my god I’m such an idiot!” I said putting my face in my hands, beginning to feel guilty. Slash continued to laugh. After a bit he calmed down a little, wiping some tears from his eyes. 

“Did you feel the same way about him?” He asked. 

“No… I love him, and care about him, and he’s special to me. But I’m not in love with him…”

“I’m so curious to know how many hearts you’ve unintentionally broken.” Slash started laughing again.

That’s how I got the nickname heartbreaker, at least the only one who calls me that is Slash. He always gets a question or two afterwards, he never answers though, he just laughs and sends me a wink.

Thank you for reading! Feel free to request or chat :)

-Isa

[webslingingslasher]

I'm craving angst right now. like I want my heart to hurt. probably sounding insane right now lmao. brb I'm gonna read your fics to feel the hurt. hope you're doing well <3

does this work? i almost teared up reading this, my brother is going through a really tough break up so this hits different (taylors version.)

You know what part of a break up they never talk about? 

They prepare you for the heartache, and it goes beyond what anyone could try to prepare you for. It’s a pain you’ve never felt before, it was weird experiencing such intense emotional pain it caused physical pain. Everything hurt, your knees were wobbly but your feet felt like lead. Your head was dizzy and painful, your chest was tight and burning, your stomach was in knots. 

It was the worst six weeks of your life. You’d never wish it on anyone, not even your worst enemy, no human should ever experience something that agonizing, ever. 

But the real kicker, the real true gut wrenching, awful, excruciating thing about a break up? 

Is watching them move on. 

Nothing could have prepared you for the gut punch you felt when you saw Peter holding hands with another girl, the air left your lungs entirely. You clawed at your throat gasping for air, you felt like you were about to pass out. 

Because it hit, reality hit. 

Peter wasn’t yours. 

He wasn’t yours anymore and you can’t pretend he would come back, he may have broken up with you but there was always that silent prayer that he’d come back, begging for a second chance, pleading that he didn’t know what he was doing, he didn’t mean it. 

That would never happen, he has someone else now. 

Someone who’s going to touch him like you did, someone who’s going to feel like arms tracing down your body like he did, someones who’s going to laugh at him like you did, someone who’s going to hold his hand and kiss his face and give him hugs and play with his hair and wear his clothes and go on dates and feel his skin. 

Someone’s who's going to love him like you do. 

It wasn’t right, you felt betrayed, how could he do this? 

Doesn’t he know he’s not supposed to move on until both people fall out of love? 

Doesn’t he know you’re never going to fall out of love? 

You feel like you’re about to have a panic attack, how did he do it? How did he just leave it all behind? How can he act like it didn’t affect him too, like the meteor strike didn’t hit? 

You need to go home, you need to go home and crawl into bed and not leave until you can mentally prepare yourself enough to see him, see him with another girl. 

See him happy. 

Didn’t he know you were supposed to be the one that made him happy? 

He was the one that made you happy, you haven’t smiled in months. 

Peter left and took your joy with him, he’s given it to someone else now. 

You feel your legs move but you’re not in control, flight is taking control and you’re backpedaling out of the school doors, you take yourself all the way home and curl under the blankets, nothing feels right or normal or fine. 

And no matter how hard you try, you can’t stop watching them hold hands, can’t stop seeing Peter’s thumb swipe across the back of her hand like he did yours, six weeks ago. Even the tears seeping out couldn’t blur the vision. 

You wanted to text him. 

You’d imagine what you’d say. 

How did you move on so quickly? 

Do you ever miss us? 

Why did it happen like that? 

What happened to us? 

Did the love affair maim you too? 

I haven’t slept since that Tuesday you ended it. 

No, they wouldn’t bring closure, and you needed that, didn’t you? 

You pick up your phone, his contact still has a heart by it.

 The day you erase it is the day you die.

You give in, maybe if he knows how much you’re willing to change it’ll work. 

‘I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy anymore, but I tried.’ 

‘I know you did.’ 

You didn’t need to say anything else, he already did. 

It wasn’t enough.