#and we've kinda only seen him from the front outside of the bits in the comic iirc

[fantrollology]

get smothered. idiot.

[princessmaybank]

I Love You So Fucking Much

Pairings: Sweet!JJ x BestFriend!Fem!Reader

Warnings: MDNI, 18+, Fluff, Pussy Whipped!JJ, Surprise Kiss, Mention of Heavy Petting, Oral (Fem. receiving, short lived), p in v, no protection, cliffhanger, not really edited, etc.

Summary: The guys have been teasing JJ about his crush all day.

Authors Note: My first fic in a while! It's a little short, let me know if you want a part 2! I hope you like it!

JJ's POV:

Pope and John B apparently woke up and chose to torture me today. All day we've been with the girls and they wouldn't stop crackin' jokes. Basically I like my best friend and the guys pressured me into telling them that information a few days ago. I haven't seen her since before I told them, and I guess the guys just got really excited and wanna be dicks. Can't say I wouldn't do the same to one of them.

We were hangin' out in front of the fire at the chateau. I was in a fold up chair in between Pope and Sarah. John B was obviously directly next to Sarah and Kie and Y/N were on the other side of the fire. I couldn't stop staring at Y/N. She is gorgeous, her eyes lit up in front of the fire. "Got a lil drool there." Pope teases and reaches for my face, causing me to back up and slap his hand. Everyone noticed me slap him and was staring. "Why'd you hit Pope?" Sarah asked.

"Because it's funny." Is the best I could come up with. Everyone went back to their conversations but I saw John B whispering to Sarah out of the corner of my eye. Next thing I know Sarah turned to me and gasped, of course he fuckin' told the blabbermouth. I glare at her and whisper 'don't' , hopefully she listens.

Pope noticed the events and giggled to himself. "I don't see why you're so scared." Once again I was the center of attention. Kie finally pipes up. "JJ Maybank is scared of something? Never." Everyone giggled, exchanging nods.

Even though the topic changed many times I was still the focus of the night. The guys, and now Sarah, have still been teasing the whole time.

"I'm gonna go grab another beer, anyone want one?" Y/N asked the group as she stood up. Everyone gave her a nod or a 'yes'. "Wasn't expecting everyone, can someone help me?" She smiled with that small laugh that makes her cheeks go pink. She looked so perfect, the fire made her eyes twinkle.

"JJ would love to help you Y/N." Pope said before anyone could offer. "Yeah JJ go help our dear friend Y/N." John B said with a smug look on his face. Y/N shook off JB's weird look as I got up and followed behind her.

She was bent over in the fridge handing beers to me, not looking back. My teeth involuntarily bit my bottom lip as I stared at her ass. She was wearing shorts but she might as well be naked with the way I'm gawking at her.

I didn't notice she had stood up and turned around until a hand waved in front of my face. "Hey there, anybody home?" She giggles. Fuck that laugh was gorgeous. "oh uhm yeah sorry-" I apologized. She giggled again. "What were you so fixated on?" "Uhm- nothing..it's not really important.." I said while grabbing the beers and heading to the door. She shrugged it off as we just went outside.

When we made it back, apparently Kie played musical chairs because she was in my seat now. Leaving the two across from everyone open. We passed out the beers and I begged Kie to give me my seat back but she only smirked at me and waved me off. So everyone knows now, fuckin' great.

"Just come sit with me Jay- I don't bite." She smiled, patting the chair next to her. "What if he wants you to..." Pope muttered almost too loud. "What?" She asked, looking confused. I shook my head telling her not to worry about it and I took my seat next to her.

Everyone on the other side of the fire is having a conversation- well Pope and Kie are, Sarah and JB are sucking each other's faces off. Y/N and I just kinda sat in uncomfortable silence for a little bit before she spoke up. "Why have the guys been teasing you all day?" I was not prepared for this question so the truth just kinda came out. "Oh- uh they found out I uh like this girl and now they won't leave me alone about it." I said not looking into her eyes. "Awe I wanna know!" She said, full of excitement. I shook my head 'no' very vigorously, not uttering a word. Everyone was looking at us again. "Oh please! I love love! I won't tell her Jayj!" She smiled and grabbed my hand for reassurance but I couldn't focus. "Yeah, c'mon Jayj! She won't tell her!" John B chimed in teasingly. My cheeks were heating up as everyone, including her, looked at me. Her hand was still on mine.

"I need to take a leak." I sprung up out of my seat and announced to the others. Everyone just shrugged as I walked towards the house. I headed to the bathroom and actually did have to piss when I got there, so I guess it wasn't a full blown lie.

When I was done I washed up and calmed down. I stared in the mirror at my bright red cheeks. How did she have this effect on me?

When my emotions were finally under control I went to walk out of the bathroom, but I was met face to face with the goddess herself. "Are you okay Jayj? You've been gone a little while." She sounded so concerned and the way she calls me that nickname makes me wanna bust in my pants right here and now.

"Uhm yeah, just a little overheated from the fire." I shrug trying not to let her fluster me. She crossed her arms like she didn't believe a word I said. "You're acting really weird tonight Jayj...did I do something wrong?" The look on her face made me upset, she looked sad. "Of course not.." I rush to say. "I told you the guys have been messing with me about my crush all day, it's upsetting me.." That also wasn't a full blown lie. I was upset over the things they were saying, but only because they were saying everything in front of said crush.

"Wanna talk about it?" She whispered softly, her eyes begged. I just nodded before motioning to the guest bedroom so I could talk about it with her privately. I sat down on the bed and when she got in the room, she shut and locked the door. I was instantly hard but I knew that's not where this was going. Y/N found her spot next to me and faced her body towards me. I stayed on the edge of the bed, not looking at her but I really really wanted to.

I felt a hand creep onto my thigh. "It's okay if you don't wan-" I cut her off by turning and kissing her. Surprisingly she kissed me back. I'm not sure where this confidence came from, but I'm running with it. Neither of us stopped this kiss until she needed some air. When our lips parted, her face was laced with shock.

"I-I'm sorry- I shouldn't ha-" I started tripping over my words before she cut me off. "I liked it." She said, still filled with shock, which made me happy inside but I wasn't sure where to go from here.

We sat in silence for about a minute before she straddled me and took my lips with hers again. She laid me down, deepening the kiss as she very carefully and slowly rocked her hips on mine. She was so scared to move her hips that I almost didn't feel it against me. I moved mine more harshly against hers to show her it was okay.

After about 30 seconds of heavy petting, I was tearing her clothes off. We had switched positions now and she looked perfect. I was standing in front of her only in my shorts and boxers while she laid there naked. I couldn't help my eyes from wandering all over her body, which unfortunately made her freeze and hide her body. I moved her arms away trying to slowly soothe her. "You're gorgeous.." I smile at her. Before she could say anything I massaged her perfect tits and then got on my knees in front of her.

"Are you sure about this?" I asked. She gave a shy smile before eagerly nodding to me. "I wanna hear a 'yes', Y/N." It came out more stern than intended. "Ye-yes Jayj.." She stuttered. She fucking stuttered. Knowing that I'm the man getting her flustered and ready, is fueling my confidence. I just want to please her in this moment.

Her eyes followed my motions as I peppered kisses on the insides of her thighs. I couldn't stop staring into her beautiful, sparkling eyes. They had a hold on me and wouldn't let go. As I got closer to her heat, she made it quite clear that that is where she needed me most. I lightly placed kisses up and down, reaching from her dripping wet hole to her swollen clit. A moan escaped her lips as she stared into my eyes. I couldn't keep teasing I needed her now. I gave her a few good minutes of sucking and licking while reaching to fondle her tits. I would have continued but I heard a soft voice say-

"JJ please fuck me..."

That's all I needed to hear. I pulled my shorts and boxers down and gave myself a few slow strokes. Her eyes landed on my dick and went wide. Her jaw dropped and she kept staring. "It will fit." I chuckled knowing that's what she was worried about.

My hands reached for her cheeks to pull her closer into a soft, passionate kiss. I climbed on top of her, never breaking our kiss and lined myself up with her entrance. Y/N wrapped her arms around my neck as I pushed myself into her slowly which resulted in her pulling her mouth away from mine to let out a moan. I smirked and pulled her lips back to mine as I began to thrust inside her at an easy pace.

"Fuck Jay, you feel so good..." She said under her breath. I watched as her eyes and head rolled back with her pretty little mouth wide open, making the most beautiful sounds. "Keep your eyes on me pretty girl." I said pulling her gaze back to me by her chin with my first finger.

"D-don't call me that.. I'll cum" She said with a light laugh causing me to giggle a little. I hid my face in the nape of her neck because I felt embarrassed and also flustered. The way we were able to laugh and not feel pressured felt amazing. This felt natural. I started giving her neck small kisses before I found her sweet spot, I sucked on it until it was a deep red and purple. The moans I was responsible for slipping from her mouth were music to my ears.

When my eyes met hers again, I swear they were telling me that she felt the same way I did. That little sparkle from before seemed to only grow brighter. This is the most intimate I've ever been in my life, and I'm happy it's with her.

"I'm almost there Jayj..." She whined into my ear. My hips sped up and I pushed her knees to her chest so I'm able to pound deeper into her. "Fuck please don't stop, please." Her eyes were pleading with me. "I don't plan on it baby..." I rolled my eyes to the back of my head, half due to pleasure, the other half because I can't believe I just called her baby. But she smiled. She actually smiled.

I held myself back from kissing her anymore. I don't know if she liked me back or if this was a one time thing. I'm already beating myself up for doing this before taking her out first. But like I said before...it felt right, natural even.

My thrusts started getting faster and sloppier. The orgasm creeping up on me took all control of my body. Her legs fell to my sides as my hands held her waist and I pulled her close. Our eyes danced between each other's lips and gaze before we sealed the deal. My hips didn't stop their motions, and I knew she was about to bust by the way her sounds were getting muffled by our kiss. I nodded letting her know I was ready as well.

Next thing I knew, she pulled her lips away from mine to moan my name, then I felt her cum leaking out onto my dick. She was so beautifully undone beneath me. When it was my turn to release, I was a moaning mess. My load shot into her, the sounds we were making tangled together to make the most amazing music I've ever heard.

My head found its way to her ear as my arms wrapped around her torso. As I rode out our highs, I made one of the biggest mistakes you could make when having 'casual' sex. I didn't realize it until I pulled my head back and saw her eyes.

I can't believe I said it..

"I love you so fucking much..."

[pastafossa]

Something really special and tear inducing happened with Pip today.

(TW for pet loss, not mine but someone else's)

So we were going into the vet for a quick shot he needed, and for a final check on the cut on his leg. So me and him got there pretty close to closing (final appointment of the day), around 3:45 when it closed at 4. And as I'm walking in, I pass a woman hurrying out. She's in tears, and my heart just breaks for her. She gives Pippin a quick, 'hi puppy' and shaky pet in passing.

But then we go through the door into the waiting room. And another woman is sitting there on the bench, cradling a small collar and just sobbing. Sure enough, the little candle is lit up on the counter for pet loss. And I'm not sure what to do - do I offer a hug? Tell her I'm sorry for her loss?

But Pippin decided he knew what to do.

I need you to understand Pip for a second. He has been with us for 3 weeks. The rescue/foster before us had him for 6. This dog is only 9 weeks removed from that horrible farm where he was beaten, neglected, and left outside by himself at all hours and seasons. He did not have love or training. So, he's learning. He still jumps a bit, paws at people. He walks ok on a leash, like he'll pull but not yank, and he's easily distracted. Easily excited by love or attention because he's not used to it. I do not think this dog has ever seen someone cry. He has not been trained to know what to do when someone is upset.

So there's Pip, seeing this distraught woman sobbing in front of him, with - as far as we know - no experience or context he could make a decision by.

In a heartbeat, I'm yanked across the room - something he does not do - so he can reach this woman. He abruptly slows for the final approach, tail gently wagging, and very softly nuzzles at her in a way I haven't seen him do before. And this poor woman reaches down, carefully cradles Pip's head, and whispers, "hi baby, soft boy. My boy was soft too."

And then she just... cries with him, her head on his.

I glance at the receptionist (who may have teared a little like I had) and I kinda tip my head towards them, a 'can I wait to check in?'. I get a nod, and a mouthed, 'we can wait.'

So I just sat down quietly next to her. Let her cry and pet him. He'd done his big lean on her legs with his head in her lap, carefully adjusting whenever she did. After about five minutes she told us - me and Pip - about her dog. 18 years old, one she'd had since he was a puppy. She showed Pip her dog's collar, and showed me pictures on her phone of this dog, a cute little white fluffball with a HUGE doggy grin. And she pets Pippin more, and asks about him - his name, how long we've had him, whether he can sit yet because her boy took a bit to learn. We talk about Pip's skinny head and I get a watery laugh out of her when I tell her I call him corndog brain since I'm pretty sure the only way a brain could fit in his long narrow head was if it was corndog-shaped and went down his snout. We're there for about fifteen minutes before a tech comes out with nose and paw prints and she stands up. Pippin stays right with her, leaning calmly against her side as she takes the prints, her fingers buried in all the fluff around his neck. She gets a hug from the tech, and then leans down to do the same to Pip. And before she goes (Pippin trying very much to follow), she looks at me and just quietly says, '...thank you for letting me borrow him. I needed that.'

I have no idea how Pippin knew what to do, or how he can be like this even after being treated the way he was. But I'm really glad he could help that woman.

[dw-writes]

Why are Stolas and Sins are being so kind to MC!Angel? Was it because she was a fallen?

Well, that and Stolas is a kinda person, so we've seen? So are the sins (sans Mammon).

The only times we've seen Stolas as mean or cruel is when I.M.P. was trapped in the human world, when Via ran away, and when he's fighting with Stella. He might be a demon, but he's not a terrible person. I think he'd really care about someone who literally fell in his lap in such a disastrous way.

The Sins, too. Theres some we havent seen much of at all, but besides Mammon, they're kind people. Bee wants Loona to loosen up and enjoy herself, she's about indulgence to a limit, but don't force yourself. And while Ozzie was mean to Stolas during House of Asmodeous, he's keeping up a front to keep a secret that he's terrified of getting out (that he later drops in Midseason Finale/post-2 Minutes Notice) so I can't see him being cruel to an angel. A little indifferent maybe, but also sympathetic (he'd feel some kind of way for the angel, because he sees a little bit of his Froggie).

And then there's Mammon who is greedy through and through. He'd capitalize on MC!Angel at the drop of a hat if he could, have the angel strung up in a cage Ye Ol' Freak Show style or performing (Glitz and Glam have wings, he's 100% figure out a way to abuse that from the angel).

Bel is mostly concerned. Bel is shown to be linked to medicinal things - medications, hospitals of all kinds, ect., but specifically those that could cause a slowing down or numbing feel (Stolas's anti depressants, the nurse at the hospital when Loona's taken for shots, etc.) so I headcanon that he's concerned. Later on, its possible for that to change (Concern into curiosity).

Satan knows how rage feels. He's literally the king of Wrath. And for him whats better than an angel exhibiting his primal sin? (This can also be applied to Ozzie in later chapters). But also that he knows how it feels to be set aside in such a way. He's mistaken for Luci far too often (as we saw from Mammon), and its not something to be brushed off as the sin of Wrath.

Levi is going to be a special case. I have VERY BIG PLANS for the Queen of Envy, and they all involve her getting as close to the angel as she can.

Please keep in mind, everything outside of Bee, Mammon, and Ozzie are headcanons, and Bel's is based on observation. Everything else is headcanon.

[max-nexus]

KGTAC PG 2094-2099 ANALYSIS

First Analysis Previous Analysis Next Analysis Tumblr Destroying this post count: 1

Alright, Well lets get to the point here, I wouldn't be making this analysis if it weren't for page 2099 as it has some genuine meat on its bones there. But there's still a bit to talk about.

KGTAC Page 2095

Wait, why couldn't Fred use one of his TWO (2) LEGS. It's interesting characterization especially with

KGTAC Page 2096

This page where his most reasonable solution was to eat the Fritos and close the container with his right hand. It's neat characterization especially with the fact he didn't think of trying to clean it, not even the classic lick your fingers and wipe the saliva on your pants trick. It really comes off as he doesn't try to keep himself nice and neat.

KGTAC PAGE 2098

GO TO THE DAMN BATHROOM YOU FILTHY PIG. Oh, and there used to be more doors here in this hallway.

Home-Skillet Page 32

And I just realized that the circle turns green after he chooses his PHOTOCHAT Color in Home-Skillet... Neat!

KGTAC Page 2099

Now we've got some actual analysis here. To assist i will list each thing with its own unique image.

Home-Skillet Page 32

The room has been completely redesigned to look more "roomy" i guess. We now have TWO (2) windows showing the outside. Although oddly enough no door?

In this image, we get a nice closeup, sadly it doesn't show anything big, though at least we know there is nothing of importance in the Display cases. Just some plates. SKETCH OF WHAT THE PORCH MIGHT LOOK LIKE

We also can't see much outside, it looks like the front yard oddly enough, Maybe we're looking at a porch. This would explain why the glass goes down to the floor, although i don't see any handles. It could just be windows but that makes literally no sense but meh, I don't have the house layout, and we haven't seen enough to be able to construct one, the only thing supporting the idea that its just a window is the fact Fred's room has a really big window (with no curtains, Jesus, someone could just peek in).

We see a portrait of a man interestingly enough, maybe a Grandpa? Though we'd need a closer look. This is the best reconstruction i could make, It took multiple guesses, The one on the right is traced on a 10x resolution version of the photo, We'd need a slightly closer view if we want to see who this guy is. He kinda looks like a moai head.

Under the TV appears to be something computer like, maybe a DVD player? it would explain whats on the other side of this cubby as cases of DVDs, although this is a bit early for someone who is implied to be behind the times tech wise (DVDs just started being massed produced in 1996, and 2 years after this story starts 1/4 American households had a DVD according to Wikipedia).

We can also see from our perspective a literal Easter egg. One that's actually decently hidden unlike in the original H-S.

Under the Fax Machine (Right side, under the portrait of a disgusting pig-like being.) is a Yellow Book of notable size.

On the table with the Fax Machine are some orange notes. Maybe DubiousCrustacean from the original H-S? since his color was orange. It's possible they're pestering him via Fax since he doesn't have a computer. (Wow that so stupid, I love it) There is also another paper but we can't figure anything about it at the current moment.

Behind the farthest right Couch Cushion is another Easter egg of the literal variety.

On the couch there's a literal black thing… I can't tell what it is at all. It a black thing with a dot in it. Maybe a remote in the couch cushions. There's also a bowl of something with napkins next to it (or papers). I guess it might be a candy bowl?

In the left side there are TWO (2) EXITS. you can barely see one of them, just like the edge of it. I point it out in the image with a black arrow. I just barely noticed it myself.

And finally, WHATS IN DE BOXX!!!?!?!?

Conclusion: Well this is the end of this update's analysis. We got some good mileage with that last page. So much to talk about and think of. Like whats with that old man? is Fred getting pestered by his friends over fax. Who knows, if anyone else has any ideas. I'd like to hear em. also i had to keep resisting the temptation to mark everything of importance in CAPITAL LETTERS. like this is Homestuck ACT 1.

[pinkanonwrites]

If you're accepting rn would it be ok to request headcanons for aizawa, hizashi and Toshinori finding their s/o that has a chipmunk quirk that makes her fall into hibernation when it's too cold (kinda like tsu) and when the guys find her with her heart rate low and her breathing shallow maybe they freak a little thinking she's really ill since she didn't tell them about that part of her quirk yet?

Aww, this is really cute!

Your soft chubby cheeks, your fluffy tail, your little, round ears that are always twitching to pick up the smallest of noises, he can't help but find them all delightfully endearing. But you had never mentioned a hibernation to him before, even though he'd picked up on your low tolerance for the cold. So when he came home to find you curled up so, so small on the living room sofa, your breath rising and falling so slowly that he could barely even see it, you can bet he was worried.

Aizawa Shouta

Very good at internalizing his terror. He may be freaking out, but you're not gonna immediately clock it on the outside. First things first, he tries to wake you up. If you aren't roused by his shaking right away, he goes to check your pulse, measure your breathing.

It's probably when he's maneuvering you into a more comfortable position that you finally blink blearily awake, and the relief on his face is impossible to miss. Of course, then he starts bombarding you with questions and concerns in a straight-forward, Shouta fashion.

"I'm going to take you to the hospital. I'm calling a car, so don't try to stand up."

You rush to reassure him that this is a normal thing, that there's no need for the hospital. He glowers at you as you explain.

"And you never thought this was something I'd need to know?"

He's not really upset, he's mostly just relieved that you're alright. Can't say he's not at least a little bit frustrated though. He helps you get off of the sofa and move you to the warmth and comfort of the bed.

"Falling asleep on the couch certainly isn't going to help anything, so c'mon. Up you go."

He'll be keeping an extra close eye on you on colder days from now on.

Hizashi Yamada

The exact opposite of Shouta. This man goes from zero to panic so fast. The sharp, worried shriek of your name rips you out of the early dregs of hibernation faster than you could blink. And he's descending upon you the instant he sees that you've woken up as well.

"Are you alright?! Oh my god, you were barely even breathing!?! We've gotta call an ambulance! Just STAY CALM!"

It's almost comical how frazzled he is, if not for the fact that you felt so bad for worrying him. You placate him as fast as you can, grabbing his hands and babbling on about your quirk until it finally sinks in that you are, in fact, not seconds away from death's cold embrace.

He's immediately relieved, slumping into your shoulder with nervous chuckles, squeezing your hands in his own. He wraps his arms around you and hugs you tight to him.

"How about you tell me when you're gonna go full grizzly bear next time? Before I start freaking out?"

He buys you a really nice heated blanket.

Toshinori Yagi

Toshinori's fear isn't a rational concern like Shouta's, nor is it a blind feverish panic like Hizashi's. No, Toshi's fear when he sees you on that couch is an ice cold, creeping dread. He's seen too many people die in his lifetime, too many friends. Not you too. God, not you too.

You're only just barely jostled awake by him cradling you in his arms, blinking your bleary eyes up at him. The sharp, twisted agony on his face is enough to fire off alarm bells in your head which force you awake despite your pesky biology.

"Toshi...? Whuh, what're you-?"

He cradles the back of your head even as you force yourself to sit up properly, like he's afraid you're just going to keel over right in front of him.

"How... How do you feel? You were barely breathing."

Oh, shit. You never told him. The guilt hits you like a bowling ball in the stomach as you look up at him, eyes still brimming with concern and unspoken terror.

He relaxes just the slightest bit as you explain your quirk to him, apologizing profusely for never telling him before, but he doesn't yet relinquish his grip on you. He's not quite as strong as he used to be, but still more than strong enough to carry you to your bedroom and deposit the two of you safely in bed. As he curls up around you, he murmurs soft into the top of your head.

"Please, never scare me like that again. I'm not sure my heart could take it."

[multifandom-girlie]

𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐜 𝐂𝐨𝐧 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟓

Imagine: “Could I request a Daniel Gillies smut like they are both at the comic con(they are both in the originals) and he is teasing her while he answers a question ? Or makes fun with Joseph and he says some dirty things.” Requested by @elijahspersonalwifeyyy .

Pairing: Daniel Gillies x Reader

Warnings: Smut

Words:

Edited: Yes

A/N: I apologise @elijahspersonalwifeyyy for the incredibly long wait. I’ve had this lined up to post but with coursework and writing so much at the same time, it’s made it difficult but I refuse to quit. I’m not a quitter. I’m also not a person to announce a hiatus. Either way, hope you enjoyed ! There is a lot to read I know but we needed a build up and this is one of my favourite comic cons ever, I wanted to do the before hand scenes either way so. Don’t forget to check out my new story “On The Way” !

All of us at the current moment in time were stood backstage waiting to be called on. I couldn't tell you how irritated I was when I went on after Joseph and then Daniel followed. They were both irritating enough to me together anyway but they were in a particularly annoying mood today and I was not prepared for it.

“The man who will break your heart and then rip it out and then probably eat it. Joseph Morgan.”

The whole audience cheered as he walked on and he waved quite casually as he did. 

“The women who brings all men to there knees but still can't find anything better to do than drink wine. Y/N Y/L/N”

I giggled as I walked out and I saw the audience screaming and Joseph giving me a mischievous look.

“The brother with a suit for every occasion. Daniel Gillies as Elijah.”

He walked out, threw me a quick smirk and blew a kiss to the audience as they screamed. He pulled his chair out and smiled at everyone.

“Nice jacket.”

“Yeah. Give it up for this jacket ! Huh ? Out of a suit and into a smoking hot jacket.”

“I know right, the one time he's not wearing a suit.”

“Thank you. It was actually a gift from Y/N.”

“Aw that’s super sweet Y/N.”

“Thank you. It was actually a gift for our anniversary.”

“Really ? How many years ?”

“Seven.”

“and very sweet.”

He called the rest of our costars out and we continued on with the panel.

After the host had started the panel with a question for Julie and Michael, it was now a group question for me, Joseph and Phoebe.

“Uh now going to the show, we've seen Klaus and Lily and Klaus and Hayley kind of trying the uh co-parenting thing and it did not really go so well as we all saw. How is Klaus going to be as a parent now that Hayley isn't around and Lily and Elijah have reconciled ?”

As soon as the question was asked, we all turned to Joseph.

“Uh you know, before he alienated his whole family by toasting Elijah's girlfriend, sleeping with his wife and and and cursing the women he thought he was in love with um Klaus survived under this sort of umbrella of Elijah's protection and forgiveness I suppose and so Elijah was always a voice of reason and Hayley was always there to battle it out with him. So, I would say badly. He's gonna do badly as a single parent you know and I think he knows he's kinda messing it up but he's trying. At least he's trying. You gotta give him that. Even if he's warping the minds of his two daughters, one before she's even uttered a syllable and the other before she get's old enough to realise that Klaus and Lily aren't actually together you know like she’s thought for years.”

“Geez. So uh how are are Lily, Elijah and Klaus going to tell her ? Who's going to be the one that does it or will they all do it together ?”

I decided to answer this questions, being more involved with the story line of my children.

“I think that Lily will have to be the one to tell her and whilst doing so will definitely have to be quite cautious when telling Sofia, you know not only because she's only 7 years old but also because she’s thought of Elijah as her Uncle her whole life- and although that hasn't changed it's still going to be difficult since this latest revelation is that, her Uncle Elijah that she adores oh so much is now also 'mommy's boyfriend' or in more formal terms her step-dad. So I think she's going to be confused and it might be quite difficult for her at first but I think she’s mature for her age and that she will understand quite quickly that, Mommy and Daddy aren't together and that despite realizing that her mom was married to her uncle I think she will quickly appreciate the fact we told her because of her understanding personality. “

Daniel quickly leaned forward and spoke before the host could ask another question.

“The moral of the story is, don't sleep with your husband's brother. Especially when not using protection and then deciding to get back together with your husband before trying to force him to sign the divorce papers.”

The whole room suddenly echoed with loud laughter and I couldn't stop giggling myself despite being offended for my character. I hit his arm playfully. He grinned at me and rested his hand on my leg as the room calmed down and he slouched back in his chair a little.

“Very true. So, I mean he can always just compel a few dozen nannies but he does have Elijah there to help him co-parent you know not just with Sofia but with Hope. I'm thinking like shared schedules, late night feedings...Whose doing what ?”

“It’s like we both wake up and the baby is crying and it's like, are you going to get her or am I ? Alright, I'll get her.”

“Yeah no it's gonna be me. I'm gonna do the graveyard shift, I know that all to well. But we gotta remember too, Lily and Freya are going to be doing a large share of the work.”

“Oh yeah, they can do it. There you go.”

I giggled and hit Joseph in the shoulder for the comment.

“Sexist.”

“No, come on. Lily's already been through this twice she knows’ what she's doing and Freya's Switzerland at this moment in time, I think for both of us to be in there...I’m gonna stop talking.”

We all chuckled at Daniel's comment.

                                               *

“Now we're going to go to audience questions in just a little bit but first I wanted to do something fun. I know it's not the holiday's and I know we don't have a big ass bonfire in front of us but I thought it would be quite fun if everybody kinda thinks about a wish for their character for the future, just throw it in the imaginary bonfire.”

“Well, I'm a human....so I just want to stay alive.”

“Good answer.”

“Oh I forgot you weren't a character.”

“I have wishes for everybody but I don't have a character.”

“I do wish for Julie that Supernatural Judge Judy becomes her next spin off and Exploding Ovaries is the title of Daniel Gillies' next memoir. 

“A wish for Hayley would be that Hope can live a normal, happy existence. I think would be what she would want the most.”

“That’s very sweet.”

“Thank you. That's it, I'm done.”

“Uh, I think for Elijah...I mean other than wishing that his girlfriend's wouldn't be incinerated or his wife doesn't sleep with his brother again...”

I giggled at Daniel's comment, despite his comment towards my character and spoke with Joseph, simultaneously. 

“Oh, come on.”

“I'm not letting that one go easily. So, uh...I would wish for him. Oh man. I wish for him, I’m actually wishing for something dark, like I sort of would wish for...a great division between the brothers before reconciliation.”

“So that's how it's going to be.”

“So, my wish for Lily is um...to finally find that bloody fertility spell that she's been looking for, for centuries. So that her and Elijah can have children of their own which they want more than anything and move somewhere outside of New Orleans in a nice family home, away from the drama.”

“That’s very sweet.”

“Uh, I wish everyone would just do what Klaus says because he's always right. He knows what he's doing. It's for the greater good. Come on. Get on board with his plans. Everything will be alright in the end. Not everyone will be alright in the end but everything will be alright in the end. Right ?”

“Um, I wish Marcel would cross over. No.”

“I wish for more of your cleavage.”

I couldn't help but laugh a little when he says comments like that. Even though it wasn't directed at me, I knew the double meaning behind it. Daniel has not taken his eyes away from my chest today. That's what breast feeding does to you, I suppose. When Daniel picked my outfit this morning, I was glad. I was going to wear some leather pants and a red blouse with some heels but he somehow convinced me to wear a dress. God was I glad, I actually listened to him. It was hot in San Diego summer heat and I underestimated a little when I decided on leather pants. 

“Yeah. We gonna get some dollar bills. Let's see some ones. Tryna make some money out here. Somebody, put on some Usher. Slow jam. Uh yeah...”

“I have a twenty. What can we get for a twenty ?”

“Break it up. Break it up.”

“Make it into ones and let's make it rain.”

“If I throw loose change at you, can I make it hail ?”

“Alright, moving on. Next subject.”

“Um, Davina is a witch and I think it would be really cool if she could fly. So, whether it's a broomstick or something else...I still think it would be really cool.”

“That’s a good one. Um, mines pretty selfish. I hate shaving, so I wish we could work something in so Vincent could have like a huge beard.”

“I changed my mind, I want superpowers as well. Three one foot long, retractable adamantine claws from each hand please.”

”Why is the camera on me ? I wanna fly. I wanna see these guys fly. I want them charging up walls and...we don’t have the budget for that. I wanna see more vampirey stuff. Why am I wishing again ? I exhausted my wish.”

“You guys can make as many wishes as you want. This is your made up tradition.”

“It’s raining wishes on you.”

“Raining for your wishes.”

“God this is embarrassing.”

“T it up.”

“T what up ?”

“What do your need for a rain of wishes ?”

“What happens when it rains ?”

“An umbrella.”

“What ?”

“An umbrella, sweetheart.”

He closed his eye in frustration and dropped his upper half into my lap, whilst we all laughed at his slow mind.

“Oh shit. Umbrella. So sorry, so sorry.”

“The rain, the umbrella...”

“Dropping hints. Awesome, alright well let’s turn it over to some audience questions.”

                                               *

“Hi, my name is Julia and first I'd like to say, I love you all. Especially Joseph Morgan and Danielle Campbell.”

“Thanks. Thanks a lot.”

“Don’t worry, I love you Daniel.”

He squeezes my thigh and leans in to kiss my head. Before deciding to move his arm around my shoulders and hugging me into his side. I rested my hand on his thigh as I hugged him back.

“I love you too, beautiful.”

I blushed and smiled, whilst the audience all awed. Which prompted the red in my cheeks to darken. I sat back up straight and he returned his hand back my thigh, yet this time a little higher up and whilst stroking the fabric of my dress up my thigh.

“My question is for the whole cast and it is, if you were able to play another role...who would you wanna play ?”

“On our show ? Or just in general ?”

“Yeah. On The Originals.”

“I..I think I would choose Hayley. The Hyrbid female. She's a pretty cool character. Your welcome.”

“Um, I would play...Klaus. Mind you probably better but...”

“I don't wanna play anybody else, I wanna play Elijah.”

“I would play, Elijah....purely because it would be an absolute blessing to wake up that hot everyday and he's a pretty awesome character.”

He smirked at me and moved his hand further up my leg, his fingers now resting at the hem of my white lace thong. I gulped a little but held my composure. It seemed hat every time I complimented him, he got further up my leg and closer to my core. Like a game...and I was more than happy to play.

“If...If I had to absolutely play someone else uh, I would play Oliver because I just think he needs to be brought back to the show...and uh #saveollie. Bring him back !”

“Uh, I would play Elijah because I think I look damn good in a suit.”

“Yeah, you do.”

“Buttoned up to the naval.”

“There we go. I know it's distracting for you, my body.”

“I cannot concentrate. I refuse to continue.”

“Um, I would play Genevieve. I thought she was a really cool character. She was a lot of fun to work with.”

“I see some Genevieve fans in the house, awesome.”

“Um, yeah I think I might choose Elijah too. I think uh, it's a really cool character that Daniel has created.”

“They both quietly believe they can bring more to the role, is what they’re saying. Not quietly, they're saying it to an audience of like three thousand.”

“Only because of what you've done with it Daniel.”

                                            *

“Hi Guys, wow that's loud. I'm so sorry, my name's Marissa. First, I want to say Daniel I watched saving hope and your death killed me. I'm so sorry that you died.”

“Yeah, tell me about it ! I was gutted.”

He squeezed my thigh a little more and started making circles with his finger on the spot closed to my core.

“Oh my goodness.”

Yeah, oh my goodness indeed. He really knew how to make a woman feel good, without hardly doing anything...quite literally.

“Um, so my question is for Julie and Michael. Um, I was wondering...there’s so much violence on the show and so much adult stuff and I was wondering if the network or the studio has ever told you, 'No you can't do that’ ?”

We all started laughing in reply to the questions.

“Oh, we have a story about that don't we...Leah.”

“I don't wanna tell the story again.”

“There's things that we did that couldn't be shown.”

“So here's the thing about broadcast television is that, apparently you can decapitate someone, you can drive a knife into a vampires skull, you can rip out their heart, you can shove a pencil up their nose, you can stab them a million times with glass but when stimulating a sex scene...if there's any movement at all that one would define as thrusting...”

“No thrusting. Pull back on the thrusting.”

“A motion that originates from the hip.”

Charles decided to get up and share a demonstration of thrusting and everyone on stage started laughing and the audience started to scream. Daniel gripped my thigh a little harder, due to jealously. I didn't have to ask him what the reason was, I already knew. At the best of times, he was not a jealous person. He loves and trusts me and Charles a lot and he knows nothing would happen but when he's horny and in need of some attention...he does get jealous. Understandably so, I know because we both do. His pinky finger then started to stroke me, through the lace of my pants.   

“It’s difficult because I don't actually remember thrusting being in the script. That was something the actors chose.”

“It was a creative choice. I mean, look at Charles...you would do the same thing. Also, let's not forget the originators of this little problem.”

The audience stayed silent, indicating that they weren't sure how to react to her last sentence. I leaned into Daniel and rested my forehead against his bicep in retaliation to Leah's comment. I couldn't stop giggling, despite the finger rubbing against my wet thong and the blush rising on my cheeks. Daniel was using his other hand to pinch his forehead, whilst chuckling.

“Come on guys, explain it.”

“So, what happened was we were doing the flashback sex scene of Elijah and Lily's wedding night. Daniel got a bit too excited and started to thrust a little and I tried hiding it by opening my legs a bit more.As I did, my underwear snapped because it wasn't as flexible as I thought. So, I had to pay a fine for showing too much skin because the sheets had come off of me a little and we hadn't realised. Not that it was much it was just a little side boob, still.”

“So, it wasn't the thrusting ?”

“No, ironically it wasn't.”

“Let me tell you. There was some excellent, simulated thrusting in those scenes. That was cut, per broadcast standards. While, I think in the same episode seventeen people got brutally massacred. It is what it is.”

“Some of the best thrusting. I hope it makes the special features.”

“Charles called Leah, for some extra rehearsal before hand.”

                                           *

“Hi I'm uh Skylar. Um, I know that between you there has been a myriad of different supernatural creatures. Uh, Phoebe...I think you've been a werewolf, a witch and a mermaid. Uh, in really life...What would you wanna be ?”

“Well, I would say witches because witches don't have to turn on a full moon and they don't have to be like plagued by vampire...the demon’s of vampires. They can just have all the power and really cute outfits...and if I can look more like Danielle Campbell. I'll take it.”

“H20 rocks!”

“Thank you ! Well actually I-Im gonna say a mermaid then. Like, life is better under the sea and I think I would be a mermaid.”

“I don't know-"

“Merman ?”

“Merman. No, I...um. I'm pretty pervy...so I'd say like invisibility.”

“Um, so I'm not pervy at all unlike Daniel. I do think that Heretics are soooo cool though. Like, they can do magic and they are vampires but still have all those human capabilities...like procreation. So, yeah a heretic.”

His hand stopped stroking me through the lace of my panties suddenly and I instantaneously felt a cold gush of air race up my well-shaved legs and punching me in my core. I felt the frayed edges of my lace tickling my upper thigh, where they shouldn't be. Hinting that my favourite pair of thongs had been snapped. I turned to Daniel and narrowed my eyes at him whilst he just continued the panel, like nothing happened. His hand when back to it’s original position resting on my thigh, clearly in punishment for making a comment about his pervy answer. 

“Nah, I'm happy where I am. You know, Hyrbid. Definitely not, invisibility. When I joined the show, I thought I was only gonna be a vampire so I was thrilled when I was a werewolf-vampire. I'm sticking to my guns.”

“I like being the token human. I'm just gonna like stay there. Create more mermen.”

“Season three, season of the mermen.”

“The next spin-off.”

“That would be so cool, let me be a mermaid. I would kill it .”

Joseph put his arm on the back of my chair, looking at me after I made my wish known to be a mermaid.

“You better not cum in the water.”

The entirety of the room ruptured into fits of laughter. Even Daniel, who had now moved his hand closer to my core again. Letting his fingers stroke my entrance. Meanwhile, I continued laughing...ignoring the feeling of my husband’s gentle and sensual touch. 

“I’m blushing.”

                                            *

“Hi, I'm Katie. If you were to go to Comic Con, on the floor. Is there anyone you would dress up as ?”

The first thought that came to mind was pleasing Daniel. If I said him there was no doubt he'd give in. The problem was, was it a risk I was willing to take...at a comic Con in front of three thousand fans and some of my closest friends.

“Daniel Gillies.”

Every one repeated my answer and whilst doing so I was discovering that I was unequivocally correct with my thought process. Sure enough, Daniel plunged his fingers straight into my entrance leaving me to deal with the resounding squeal that ripped from my throat. Causing Daniel to laugh at me, influencing Joseph to join in.

                                            *

The final question had just been answered by Daniel and I was leaning my head into Daniel's shoulder to help with controlling the moans erupting inside me. The warmth in my stomach has just appeared as quickly as it vanished again, Daniel had stopped and chuckled at my irritated expression. Nevertheless, I got up and shoved my now broken thongs in Daniel's jacket pocket and waved at the fans with a bright smile on my face as we all walked off. We had just got out of the fan's eyesight when a hand delivered a hard slap to my barely covered assume cheek as this dress was so short. I span around and grabbed his wrist before dragging him further backstage, behind a screen next to the dressing rooms.

“What do you think your doing ? Playing around like that during a panel and then not even letting me finish ?!”

I didn't even let him reply as I dragged his face down towards mine and kissed him lustfully. His hands wandered down to my waist and clutched the already tight fabric tighter around me. The other unoccupied hand drove down to my ass and clutched it, allowing the skirt to rise up. Exposing the bare skin of my cheek. I used one of my hands to undo his zipper before pulling his dick out and stroking it. Clearly, he was eager because before I knew it. I was pressed up against the wall, sticking my tongue down his throat and moving myself up and down on his already hard cock. What we hadn't realised that the screen had moved, as Daniel had knocked it with his foot when walking to the wall. He pulled away and smirked at me.

“You told me we wouldn't have public sex after last time.”

“This is the last time Mr Gillies, I'm promising you.”

We smiled at eachother and kept going against the wall. His tip caused some tension when arriving to a depth he hadn’t before but it was a pleasurable one most definitely. The lips of my pussy enveloped his tip and he ran it through my drenched folds before deciding to plunge into me once again. I was about to scream and he knew I wasn’t good at being quiet when he fucks me so good. I clung onto him hoping it would relieve tha ache he’d created by filling me so good. He sat down on a chair that was sat in a chair of the little area backstage. Sitting down, allowed his thrusts to speed up rapidly and his face to rest in between my smooth and nearly covered beasts. He bit my hardened buds through my dress and caused a shive of please to shoot down to my core and promoting me to burst.

I then decided to let go and couldn’t help but let out a gratifying scream for him. I was coming down from my high and the screen pulled back. A man that looked about 40, eyed us disgusted and told us to move it.

“Well atleast I won the deal ?”

“Remember the deal we had ? If I was right about is having sex in public again no matter how much you denied that we wouldn’t. Your were very adamant.#

*

MASTERLIST

[miss-kittys-magical-library]

Dress You Up In My Love (Darren Treacy x Jeanie Turner)

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: angst, smut, language, cross dressing kink

A/N: Darren needs just one night to hide after pulling a hit on Dublin's biggest drug lord. He turns to secondary family where he finds out something surprising about himself and unfinished business from his cousin's wedding. (Takes place in series two between episodes 5 and 6. There ARE spoilers for series two of Love/Hate.)

A frantic knocking sprung Jeanie out of sleep that she didn't remember falling into. She hurriedly pulled on the hotel bathrobe and shouted at the door she was coming. A glance at the clock told her it was 8pm. Still plenty of time for him to come by.

Jeanie opened the door and gasped. “Dazz?! What's going on?”

“Is Gordo here?” The man shifted from foot to foot outside the doorway. He had a motorcycle helmet in his hands and a wild look behind bright green eyes.

“No. He's been up at Trinity in that fucking lab all day. I've not seen him.”

“I need a place t’crash for a few days,” he half-begged, half informed Jeanie as he pushed past into the suite. “Crikey this is posh. If I knew Gordo was gonna grow up t’have this kinda cash, I wouldn't have poked fun at the specs n shite.”

“Darren is there something I can help you with? As we've not seen you in four years?” Jeanie crossed her arms over her chest.

“I.. Did something. Just need a place t’lay low. Figured my cousin was th’last place anyone would look.” There was a shrug in his voice.

“Why not Rosie?”

Darren started to shed his jacket then ran a hand through his shaggy hair, “Best not involve her either. Not exactly talking these days.” He held his jacket out to Jeanie.

“Fuck off with that!” she swatted the jacket away.

“Oi! Just hold it while I take off the rest.”

“Rest of what? Your clothes? Hi Darren. Haven't seen you since the wedding. You've grown up. Sorry about Robbie and your mum. Thank you, Jeanie. How have you been? How's Scotland? Just lovely. Don't see Gordon for days and he's had TWO affairs.”

“Fair point, darlin,” Darren stepped out of his boots and unzipped his sweatshirt. “The Treacy side ain't exactly one t’write home about. Are we, yeah? ‘Cept Mary.”

Jeanie took the leather jacket and pinched her nose. Eyes closed. Something sticky about it made her recoil. Eyes popped open. She held her hand up; it was speckled brownish red.

“Dazz is this blood?!”

“Best you don't know. Can I shower?”

“I don't know, can- JESUS DARREN PUT SOME FUCKING CLOTHES ON” Jeanie covered her eyes.

“I'M IN UNDERWEAR!” he shouted back, laughter in his voice. “Alright, Ginge. Haven't ye ever seen a grown man in his underwear? You just need to get rid of those anyway ye can. Please?”

“Well you certainly aren't 16 anymore.”

“I was 18 when ye’s got married. Don’t ye remember?” his eyebrow arched suggestively.

“I would say I tried to forget, but when I'm stuck alone at night, or in a hotel for days at a time, I don't feel bad. It really was foreshadowing for the rest of our marriage.”

“Gordo’s cousin trying t’shag his new wife th’night he got married? Almost got that tossover. Pride myself on that.”

“I was hammered and you have very hypnotic eyes. Like Kaa in the Jungle Book”

Darren frowned, his brows knit together in confusion. His lower lip turned out as he struggled to comprehend that as compliment or insult.

Jeanie couldn't help but stare now. A proper look. Darren's body hadn’t changed much since she last saw him. Still thin, muscles a bit more defined. Scars littered his chest and stomach as he exhaled deeply. It was labored.

“Are those from a gunshot?” Jeanie looked minorly distressed.

Darren absently ran his fingers over the old wounds. “Aye. Working on one lung and I'm a bit barmy now.” Like it was no big deal.

Jeanie sighed heavily, but stopped to gather up his clothes. “I'll take a walk, and ditch these. Against my better judgment. Clean clothes are in our bags. You're about his size I suppose.” She rummaged around in the closet by the front door for a garment bag.

“You're a fucking beauty!” Darren snatched his cousin’s wife up in his arms. He pecked her cheek awkwardly.

“Towels are in the bathroom,” Jeanie grappled with what just happened. “I'll be back in half an hour. I hope whatever you did is fucking worth it. Dazz.”

“Trust me, love. No ones gonna miss him.”

------

Jeanie sloshed out of the canal bed glad she packed her Wellingtons for the unpredictable Irish weather. Grateful too for the stones she found along the water side. She had put the hotel pub news bulletin out of her mind warning of a gangland hit on a local known drug lord. One that showed up to her wedding on the arm of Darren and Gordon’s aunt.

“I hope Darren shot you right in the fucking face, and you knew it was him.” Jeanie muttered as she watched the clothes sink after she pushed the bag under the surface.

Maybe it was hypocritical she was relieved JohnBoy was dead. Dazz wasn't the only one who tried to fuck her that night, but he was the only one she welcomed. Maybe, Jeanie owed Darren a bit of physical gratitude.

-----

Jeanie shut the door behind herself and popped her boots off in the closet. She changed quickly in the bathroom.

“You hungry or anything? I hope you found clothes that-”

Jeanie stopped in her tracks when she came around the wall that divided the suite foyer from the bedroom. Darren with his back to the full length mirror, was twisted so that he could look at himself. He seemed to be staring at his own ass.

“What are you doing?!” Jeanie was surprised, but amused more than anything.

“Oh! What kinda fookin underwear does Gordo have?” Darren's cheeks were just a hint of pink as he caught Jeanie’s eye. “T’ere’s no place for my cock when I piss, but they feel nice? Like t’ere comfortably snug?” He caressed his ass for emphasis.

“Well, those are mine. Not Gordon’s boxer briefs. So that answers the cock question. And they look snug because you have.” Jeanie's eyes strayed down over the bulge that had grown inside the boy shorts. “Well you must REALLY like them.”

Darren's eyes were wide, but he didn't seem embarrassed. Not really. His gaze followed Jeanie's downwards to his erection. “Yeah looks t’at way, doesn't it. I promise ye, I've never done t’is before.”

“Who cares if you have. Women wear boxers all the time. Back home, when I was in uh, what's it here? 1st through 4th year, all we wore was boxers as regular shorts. If you like them, Dazz, you could try some more?”

Jeanie had sat down on the bed. One knee crossed over the other with her hands clasped together. She bit her lip while her heart drummed loud in her ears. A pleasurable discomfort as she began to throb at the sight of Darren in her panties. The anticipation of him getting into a sexier pair. Letting her feel them. It had been so long.

“I mean, I'm not going anywhere t’ night. I’m not dressing in full drag though,” he insisted.

Jeanie stood and rifled through the suitcase. “I didn't think you wanted to. My regular clothes wouldn't fit you anyways.” She bit her fingernail and debated between a deep purple and cobalt blue. “I'm built like an hourglass and you,” she laid her choices on the white duvet, “are built like a baby giraffe.”

Darren rolled his eyes but joined Jeanie at the bedside. He gravitated towards the purple ones. Mostly lace with a bit of satin, they would look absolutely obscene on him. In the best possible way.

“Ye were wearing these t’at night,” Darren was full of nostalgia.

“I didn't know your side of the family could be sentimental besides Mare,” Jeanie giggled. She couldn't help it. “I definitely married the wrong cousin. Sometimes, I wish I could legally kill him,” there was an uneasy humor in her voice.

“I mean, I would do it for ye.” Darren didn't even hesitate.

“Um..” Jeanie's face matched her hair.

Darren burst into laughter, “Ease up, darlin’. I'm fuckin with ye.”

Jeanie wasn't certain about that but she played along. His smile both unnerved her and turned her on. The way he studied her and then the panties with a curiosity and delight.

“Why don't you put those on, and I put on the bra. Then.. we can make a full set.” There was innuendo in Jeanie's suggestion.

“We can't.”

“We CAN. The right sentiment is whether or not we SHOULD.”

“Should I really put these on?”

“Would you really kill someone you care about?” It was a strange reciprocation.

“If I cared about Gordo, I would not have tried t’fuck his wife the night he got married.”

Jeanie licked her lips, flames curled around her ears and cheeks. “Put them on. Anything I can do to make you more comfortable? Liquor?” She reached inside her shirt and produced a small bag that she swung back and forth, “Cocaine from your jeans?”

Darren reached for it but she was quicker. Stuffing it back in her bra, she swatted his hand away. “How about you.. don't do stimulating narcotics with a PTSD chaser?”

“It keeps me awake so I don't have nightmares. Just go so I can put t’ese on!”

Jeanie planted herself on the bed after taking her shirt off. She leaned back on her elbows, legs crossed. “I'm not going anywhere.”

“Fine! But close your eyes, so we can both be surprised. Wait, why’d ye take your shirt off?”

“Won't this make you more comfortable?” She pushed her chest forward a bit.

Darren’s eyes darted down to Jeanie's tits where they lingered longer than she expected. “Alright, sweetheart.”

Jeanie could listen to him talk for hours. Still she squeezed her eyes shut with a dramatic flare. “Go on then. I can't bloody wait.”

There was some shuffling around as Jeanie sat without peeking. Her heart raced in anticipation as she realized Darren had tossed what he was wearing at her feet.

A few minutes went by, and she lost patience, “Can I look? You've gotta have them on by now.”

“Fine, but don't laugh! I can't seem to get my junk in these.”

Jeanie opened her eyes and her mouth, “Fuck me, Dazz. Those are..” She stood up and made her way over to him from behind as he faced the mirror. Completely unable to stop herself. “You look delicious.” A word no one has ever used to describe either of them.

Jeanie’s hands on Darren's thin hips. They ran back and down over the sheer and lace over his ass. There was a playful squeeze before changing direction and flattening her hands on his. Downwards and into the indentation of his abs. Then she stopped to trace her fingertips over the angry red scars. Jeanie ran her fingers over them as if she wanted to memorize them.

Darren’s stomach convulsed a bit under her touch. “Jaysus,” he muttered under his breath. Eyes shut as Jeanie watched him in the mirror.

“Let me take care of you. Just one night,” she kissed between his shoulder blades. “You certainly deserve it after what you did today.”

“What did I do t’day?” Darren challenged Jeanie with his question. His hands covered hers, but not to push her away. To guide them down further over his erection.

Jeanie playfully squeezed again. The man in front of her let out a sound between a gasp and a moan when she began to rub the satin barely containing his cock. Her open palm gained friction as she worked faster. Where a man might find a woman's clit between her legs under the fabric, Jeanie moved her palm over Darren's balls.

“Eradicated part of Dublin’s largest pest population,” each word punctuated by her hand moving faster. Jerking him off without ever touching more than the underwear.

“I hope..” Darren's breath hitched and grew heavy. “Someone else..” his hips started to twist. “Ro-”

“I don't think we should talk about her right now, do you?” Jeanie cut him off. She finally let herself reach inside of the panties to properly take his cock in her grip.

Her thumb played with the head, slick with precum. Fingers wrapped around the shaft and stroked the length down and back up. She wasn't used to doing it from this angle but found it even sexier. The power she felt surge being the one in control. How wet she was inside her OWN panties.

Darren's head hung back as he lost himself in the ecstasy of what his cousin’s wife was doing. He didn't care that she was married. To a man who neglected her, ignored her.

Nidge. Tommy. His own sister. His cousin. They fucked around all the time. He and Rosie, that almost got her killed and they weren't even shagging. He knew he'd be livid if he caught her cheating. not violent mind you, but pissed. Just like if Siobhan or Trish did it. Or even Gordon. Everyone was a hypocrite.

Yet here was Darren. His cousin’s wife wanking him off while he wore her knickers. And he didn't give a fuck for once. His dick hadn’t been this hard in ages. That day he and Rosie had sex felt so long ago. They didn't do it much if at all since then.

Maybe this wasn't right, but Darren couldn't care anymore. He stood three feet above a malicious drug lord reduced to a cowering pussy and killed him. It was the same feeling as Jeanie's fingers as they twisted and kneaded his cock. Euphoric.

“If we don't take this to the bed. only one of us is gonna get a happy ending.”

Darren turned quickly. Faster than Jeanie could focus on. Their mouths finally crashed together as he gripped a handful of her. He shoved his tongue in her mouth and hands in her the pockets of the jeans she still wore. He dug his fingers into the thick of her ass as they stumbled back towards the bed.

Jeanie's hands labored in an effort to unbutton and unzip her pants around Darren's body as it thrust into her. She didn't want to stop the war their tongues waged as she struggled to tug the denim over her hips, but there was air as her husband’s cousin intervened. They laughed as he yanked them down to the floor and he went with them.

Darren looked up at Jeanie, who now sat on the edge of the bed, as he knelt on the floor by her feet. He helped each ankle as she lifted them out and literally kissed the tops of her feet as she drew them up on the comforter.

“That was romantic,” her voice thick and barely above a whisper. No hint of her usual sarcasm or humor, only some embarrassment. Her cheeks were pink.

“I've wanted t’fuck ye since we met. And I want ye to remember this for a long time.”

Darren stood up and hooked his fingers in the elastic of the underwear of hers that he was wearing. Jeanie covered his hands and leaned forward to kiss his stomach and his scars. Using her tongue this time to trace over them like she had her fingers.

“Leave them on? I'll never forget it if you let me fuck you wearing those.” Her fingers tangled up in the lace. Tips of her nails just brushed his cock through it.

Darren smiled in a way Jeanie wasn't sure he was capable of doing anymore. Right now, in this moment as his eyes changed from darkness to almost emerald, she knew he let himself forget. That's all she wanted. One night for both of them to forget.

“Can't say I've ever had sex like t’is,” excitement in his voice. “I'm right curious t’see how ye manage.”

“You lay down, and I'll play it by ear. This is definitely a new one for me too.”

They switched places. Darren laid down on the bed, head on the pillows. Jeanie unhooked her bra and slipped out of her own panties. She stood naked and exposed in the lamplight. Her heart raced when she realized he couldn't keep his eyes off of her. They traveled over her breasts and stomach and further still as she crawled on the bed beside Darren and straddled him.

“Fuck me,” it was a response. And a suggestion he made simultaneously. His hands spread out over her back and caught up in her long red hair.

Jeanie raised a bit up on her knees to situate herself. She lowered her body so that the outline of Darren's cock beneath the satin and lace was between the folds of her naked sex. Her hands anchored on his chest as she started to ride him.

“Jaysus your so fucking wet already,” Darren breathed and ran his hands up and down Jeanie's body. Over her shoulders and to her ass where they settled on her hips.

“It's you in my bloody knickers,” her voice wavered as she started to rock harder back and forth.

It was like a pleasurable rug burn on her cunt, as Jeanie closed her eyes and twisted her hips just a bit. She rode the length of Darren’s hardened cock completely from bottom to top and kept gaining speed each time. His strong hands buried in her waist helped her pump over and over. Then he angled himself underneath her so that the tip could hit her clit just right as she moved down.

Jeanie rode harder and faster. The satin and her cunt on fire as Darren's cock started its familiar twitch. She clawed at him without caring if someone else saw the marks on his chest. That explosion was building deep in her walls as they throbbed and ached for him to be entirely inside of her.

Instead Darren slid a thumb into her cunt. It replaced his cock as Jeanie started to lose control. Circled and fucked as she fucking him.

She clutched his wrist, “Harder. Rub my clit harder. Like that.”

He obliged all too eagerly. Especially when moments later she cried out unexpectedly. Her body rolled into an orgasm. He never let up with his thumb or his own hips as they bucked up into Jeanie as she came.

“Let me fuck you properly,” Darren begged as her cunt constricted around his hand. His thumb, the knickers and Jeanie's body slicker than before they started.

Then Darren's mobile rang. Darren's mobile was always ringing.

Tag list: @joz-stankovich @robertsheehanownsmyass @badsext @slutforrobbiebro @badsext @sean-falco

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Only time' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Only time"

"Freya, what I need right now is only time....I'm trying to stay strong !"

Chapter Summary : Yirina has managed to survive & won during the trigger memories Stitch & Freya forced her to relive but since they thought to have won....she needed to play the second act.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +3300

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

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They think they have won me....they think they have succeeded to break me and my control over my body by making me relive the same trigger memories that put me to reveal Perseus location 3 years ago and now, they wanted me to....put me back into their ranks but that didn't work and they don't really know that for the moment. I already faced that battle and I knew how things were going to happen, it was also the first time....I disobeyed in those memories, always thinking that I was doomed to follow the orders but I was wrong. Now....I only have to do one thing....

"She's moving her arms, she's awakening !"

"Her eyes are following too !"

I heard these voices back during my trigger memories but now, I could hear them well as my eyes were slowly opening up, blinded by the light that was almost above me, trying to move but still attached to that stretcher, my head hurting me like it did before, half in the vapes until my eyes were now widely open, discovering Freya near me, her hands on the stretcher with Dedov next to her, him looking to an file in his hands until Stitch arrived in the room, going in front of Freya at the other side of the stretcher.

"So, she's awake, it seems." He observed, looking at me before removing his eyes away. "It took almost 2 hours but she's back." He added.

"Her state was mostly stable during that time, nothing to worry about." Dedov affirmed, giving the file to Stitch.

"Where...I am ?" I asked in an low voice, starting my second...act of play....

"It's alright, Yirina." Freya replied, moving slowly to put her hands on my face, stroking my cheeks. "You're safe now with us." She affirmed again, having removed her mask from her face.

"Do you think she still has her memories or not ?" Stitch demanded, handing over the file back to Dedov before looking to me again.

"Guess an test is necessary to know that, sir." He proposed, putting the file away behind him as Freya get her hands off me in an gentle way.

"Well, to start easily, do you remember your name ?" Stitch started, his hands behind his back.

"Uhm...Yirina..Grigoriev ?" I muttered, fainting to think about it and the three nodded, Dedov biting his lips away.

"Good for the moment." He scratched the back of his head, looking thinkful.

"What's the last thing I remember, Yirina ?" Freya questioned, looking worried to be honest, thinking that she didn't want me to lose my memories.

"I don't know." I whispered as in my head, I was looking through some memories that was going inside my head, wanting to find an far away one. "Yes...Afghanistan." I claimed, having found the perfect one.

"Afghanistan ?" Freya & Stitch chuckled in unison, very curious towards me.

"Yes, you don't remember, Freya ?" I said, looking at her with an little grin and also an tear appearing on my left eye. "I...I proposed." I revealed, causing her eyes to go wide.

"You proposed...but to who ?" Stitch demanded, sounding an bit stunned to hear that until he looked at Freya. "Wait, she proposed to you ?" She nodded to him.

"Yes, she did." She grinned an little, taking my left hand in her owns before an feeling of sadness took over her face. "But...this was 4 years ago." She snorted.

"What....4 years ?" I sounded shocked, thinking at first that I was awakening from an coma to them. "What happened ?" I asked, seeing the concerns of their looks as they weren't ready to this. "Freya, tell me." I pleaded.

"I don't know but...." She started, her eyes mixing between Dedov & Stitch...she was surely thinking of an fake story in her head. "Listen, the most important is that you're back with us." She affirmed, suddenly avoiding the subject.

"Yes, she's right." Stitch exclaimed, pointing at her as for me, I knew that I couldn't remember of everything.

"Who are you ?" I faked to not knowing him before I looked at Freya. "Freya, who is he ?" I continued to question her.

"You don't remember Stitch ?" I shook my head to her, still 'wondering' who was that masked man with an black hood near me.

"Dedov, is there any explanations to that ?" Stitch wasn't sounding sad or mad....just normal.

"Well, it seems that the br-....the recovery...." He purposely coughed but in me, I was realizing that they will try everything to hide the brainwashing from me. "It could have saved some of her memories while the others are needing time to be recovered."

"So, as we see, she's still having her memories but they're kinda random." Stitch suggested, putting his hands on the stretcher and Dedov nodded to him.

"Yes but as we have seen, she's not considering herself as another person." Dedov added to that statement, making me 'wonder' why they were talking about another person. "We will might need to make others recovery tests but it will not be before 2 days." He continued, giving his thoughts on the situation.

"It's about the risks to not losing her, I'm correct ?" Freya theorized, still following by an nodding from Dedov.

"We will have more time to do the tests on the other woman." Stitch proclaimed, crossing his arms to look at Park's direction....she was asleep, an few doctors around her....they must have start to drug her, the same situation I faced for days and now, it was her turn...

"Do you know her, Yirina ?" It was Freya that was going to ask me that question for sure, feeling her voice near me as I was looking at Park unconscious.

"No." I lied, cracking in the inside to not acknowledge her. "Is she...someone you're trying to save too ?" I asked back, looking at the three of them.

"Yes, we're trying to save her too." Freya claimed, feeling the whole lie behind her voice.

"She's suffering the same fate as you, Grigoriev." Stitch quoted, trying to be funny to me, that wasn't working at all. "Anyway, Dedov, you continue to direct the test for Park to see when we can start." He ordered in an clear voice to hom, causing him to salute and join the doctors near Park, leaving me alone with Stitch & Freya. "What now ?"

"Now ?" Freya was an bit strangely happy to be honest.  "I'm bringing her with me to my quarters." She admitted, sending me chills in my body to hear that.

"Wait, you're actually saying that you want her to be with you, to roam that base freely ?" Stitch protested, almost slamming his fists against the stretcher.

"She will stay with me all the time between each test, nothing to worry about." She exclaimed, trying to reason him.

"That might be the stupidest plan I have ever heard." He objected as Freya was starting to removing the links of the stretcher to set me free.

"She's one of us, remember ?" She seemed to correct him, removing the link that was avoiding my legs to move before finishing by my hands & chest, making me fully free after hours on that thing.

"Why I was attached ?" I demanded, making round with my both hands to relax them better from the links. "Was it because I did hurt someone ?"

"No, not at all, it was for your safety." Freya replied, helping to get up back on my feets, keeping her hands on me in case.

"Before you go with her, I need to talk to you about an important detail." Stitch interrupted her as she was starting to go away with me out of the medical room. "Without her, of course." He corrected him.

"Yirina, await me outside, okay ?" She ordered to me and I nodded, opening the door for me and let me go outside with me staying near the door, back closed by her.

Honestly, I could have run away and escape this place but...I wasn't going to let them have Park, she was still in that room behind me, been experimented on, surely going to brainwash her and I have to do something. I tried to put my ears to listen about what the two were going to talk about but it was mostly muffling and the only real audibles parts I could hear was about Sonya themselves but I couldn't listen to everything until the door opened again by Freya, having some luck to have removed my ears seconds before.

Then, I was now obliged to follow her for the first time, not been handcuffed or drugged but I was master of my own movements in those hallways and for the first time, I could discover the outside in days. Unfortunately, it was already the night and I couldn't exactly know where this location was but it was surely an military base. Freya was explaining that she was going to help me relive some memories of my life and for that, I was going to live with her in her own personal quarters in another part of the base in an building.

"Here we are !" She said after we got inside an big building that was near an small airstrip and then, in front of an door that I supposed to be her quarters. "Welcome home, Yiri." She whispered, opening the door, to make me discover where she was living in this base : it was modest but looking like an officer quarters.

"Is this where you live ?" I asked her and she nodded as I enter the room first thanks to her.

"Exactly, we've been established here for an month now." She replied, closing the door behind me as she passed near by, removing her military vest off her, going to the king-sized bed....maybe better than the bed in that cell. "We're making some operations against our enemies."

"Okay." I muttered, watching her undressing her on that bed without moving at all from my position.

"You're not coming ?" She stopped herself, watching me like a site block.

"I don't know...should I ?" I demanded, pointing at her.

"Of course and you're looking tired." She responded, removing her pants before she tapped next to her, the position she wanted to give me on that bed. "Come on, don't be shy." She told me, looking at me, unsure until I resigned myself to do so and join her in the bed but not even removing my clothes. "Take them off, Yiri, it's fine."

"No, I'm better with them." I expressed, installing myself in the bed, looking at the other direction while my head was hold by my right hand. I couldn't really remove my clothes here, uncomfortable to do so.

"If you want..." She chuckled before she put her arm around my chest, wanting to keep me with her. "I told you that I will bring you home." She affirmed in an clear voice, holding me firmly as I was blank stare, looking at the wall away....I need an plan....

I know that I needed to talk to someone and that particular person was none other than Bell....me...myself. She's the one who told me that I was going to hold on & fight, that I will maybe won that fight and that my help was going to be in the inside and all of this was true, she saw what happened but I needed to know more. As I thought to find myself on that airstrip in Turkey or that cliff in Solovetsky, it was another place I found myself in : the old CIA safehouse in West-Berlin...E9...

This place was looking empty of people but it was looking used with an lot of paperworks on the desks all around and that dashboard.....that dashboard full of intels we got over the days in 1981. It was weird to go back here even if it was only an dream and I was just alone until I saw an figure of myself, working at Park's old desk...the place I was also used to work on...Bell was still wearing the same outfit from Solovetsky.

"I know you will do it." She started, going up from the seat she was sitting on as I was leaned against Adler's desk. "I told you that you will won that fight." She added with an smile on her face.

"You did, thanks." I thanked her with my gratitude, an grin on my face.

"No, no need to thanks me, I'm just yourself." She scoffed, raising her shoulders before she arrived near me.

"You told me that my help was going to be in the inside, you were right." I admitted, crossing my arms to remember about what happened. "These americans soldiers, they....they were like now aware of my state and they tried to help me."

"And they did help you." She affirmed, making an tap on my shoulder. "You broke the control that Stitch had on you, allowing you to make your own choices in that memory." She added, giving me an explanation of my moves.

"I didn't know how it happened but disobeying these orders...." I stopped myself, thinking about how I could disobey the orders without consequences. "Was it something that could have been done ?"

"Yes, we just done it." She smiled, not realizing my seriousness of my question but I decided to not say anything else, looking at Perseus picture on the dashboard. "But I'm afraid that this victory is short-living." She muttered, looking down.

"What do you mean ?" I demanded, worried.

"They're thinking that they won you back  but if more tests are happening, they will really win you !" She revealed, realizing the danger of the situation. "You have only an short time to think of something." She ordered, clearly.

"I'll try but if they're limiting my movements, it isn't going to be easy." I said, getting up from the desk to get next to the dashboard. "And I'm not going away without Park." I told Bell, already knowing that perfectly.

"I know...I know." She exclaimed, walking next to me. "You have only one day to make it count but I know you will do this." She added, both now looking at Perseus picture.

"I'll try." I repeated in an low voice as my eyes were getting narrowed by themselves, slowly meaning that it was the end of that memory....

"I'll try to find an plan, we will soon leave this place !"

I needed an plan....that all I needed to do for the upcoming day where I couldn't know what I was going to do while been under the look of Freya herself. That thought was the first thing I had when I woke up the morning of that day to the sounds from the outside and since days, I could directly see the light of the sun coming through the window, reassuring me and bringing an smile on my face despite having an bit of pain at my chest, signifying that Freya's hold on me was an bit too firm.

When I got sit on the side of the bed, I could discover that Freya wasn't with me on the bed, her former clothes all over the floor and I could hear her inside an room...probably her own bathroom, taking an shower. I preferred to wait for her actually on the bed to come back but it seems that she was taking her time in it, causing me without actually wanting to do it, to got up from the bed and to go to the door.

"Freya ?" I knocked two times against the door, not so noisy knocks and in an low voice, looking down.

"Yirina, it's you ?" She asked me as the sound of water going out from an shower was not audible anymore.

"Yes, it's me." I responded, wondering if it was too late to go back to my tracks and on that bed.

"Good, you can come in." She suggested and without hesitation that I should have in me, I opened the door to enter the bathroom....guess it was too late to step back now. As I thought...she was partially naked, only starting to cover herself with an towel when I enter.

"You could have told me about that." I expressed, an bit blushing on my face by seeing her like that.

"Why should I ?" She raised an eyebrow with an smile. "We're engaged, remember ?" She make me remember of that from the memory I told her....feeling so bad for Sonya at this moment....They're loving her but it seems that it isn't reciprocal....I'm not loving her....but I had to act....

"I know, it's just...." I stopped myself to get sit on the side of the bath just next to me. "I'm troubled by an lot of things, Freya." I told her, joining my hands together once sit.

"It's okay." She whispered, sitting next to me, putting her left hand over mine. "Listen, you know that I'm here to help you." She affirmed again her lies as I kept an straight face to her.

"What's going to happen today ?" I demanded, wanting to know deeply.

"I'm going to make you walk around freely in the base, hoping to make you remember of things." She replied, not even flinching her eyes away from me. "It's going to be an lot of days before you could remember of everything right & good for me." She added, knowing that it was for 'her & them' in terms of good & right.

"And those tests ?" I questioned her, curious about it.

"You know what ? We should stop talking about this." She proclaimed as she start to make me look in her eyes and my hands to go around her waist....I know what she wanted but....shit, I have to act despite been weakened by that in the inside.

"What are you doing ?" I asked in an normal lowed voice, almost breathless.

"Helping you remember." She breathed she pulled me in for an kiss on my lips.

She was going to do it anyways and I had no choices but to get along with it, feeling ashamed of what I was doing but she was starting to go further by going up and making me move, holding my  hands, inside the shower before continuing to kiss me...removing her own towel off her, back to be naked before she decided to action the shower wanting to tense the kiss by making me & her wet.

I was starting to struggle inside of me to stop that kiss but more she was doing it, more I was going to fall deeply and in fact, that kiss was only broking me because of many things....Sonya's love with Freya and Freya who seems to not give an fuck about it. It was only after an few moments after she actioned the shower that I finally found the courage to actually act freely, breaking her control over me.

"Wait, stop !" I said in an clear voice, stopping the shower with my right hand before leaving the shower, all wet because of her.

"Yirina, come back." She pleaded, staying inside the shower. "What's wrong, Yiri." She demanded from me as I moved to clean up the wet redhead hair of me.

"I need time !" I replied in an harsh tone to her, feeling ashamed of that kiss I did, looking myself through the mirror. "I know that you & me are an thing but what happened to me, that sudden loss of memories." I added, passing my hand with the towel through my hair.

"Yes but I'm helping you, remember ?" She told me in an low voice, taking back her own towel on the ground as I was finished to clean up.

"Maybe but...I need time." I repeated again, turning around to not look at her at all. "I love you but I need to stay strong and for the moment, I need to stay focused and strong." I continued, giving my thoughts on the situation, between good & wrong. "I know that you're at my side but that...I don't think it's really helping me." I claimed.

"Yirina..." She whispered before stopping herself.

"I know, you're trying to help me but not like that." I admitted as I moved near the opened door to lean myself against the door frame, turned to the bedroom direction, not able to look at her in the eyes with that attire....

"I just want some time to think freely...and an plan to stay strong."

[unknownblanked]

Shameless self promotion

Main character: OC

Pairings: OC x Reborn

My fic:

*Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn*

*Rating M*

Summary: I have never wanted anything other than to be a boss. Sorry dear brother of mine, but I will become a better boss than you would ever become. Warning: M for a reason, not for innocent souls. 2 days updates

Kinda BL since MC who used to be a girl became a guy after transmigration. But idk what to even say at this point

Genre: fantasy/adventure/romance

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/13908034/1/

First chapter preview:

Chapter 1

"Eff you! Eff me! Eff the world!" She shrieked with her lungs, hand pointed at the sky.

"I wanna hold guns and look cool in suits! I wanna be pardoned by university to become a boss! I wanna have a gang while playing background music!"

"IF I EVER REINCARNATE TO KATEKYO HITMAN REBORN, I'LL BECOME VONGOLA DECIMOOOOOOOO!"

Darkness enveloped her as she sunk deeper into the abyss, not knowing what was going on after that flash that blinded her eyes. Could it be isekai truck-kun? She scoffed at her own words, not believing a single thing that came out of her own thoughts. She felt a shuffle, then a thump as her whole world lifted in the air. Suddenly, a baby's cry chortled beside her, screaming.

What was going on? Was she being carried into some kind of ambulance? A hospital? Did she give birth-What? But she was still 19 years old and never touched a man's hand! The baby's cry grew louder, almost piercing her in the ears.

Was it even possible for her to remain conscious even though she couldn't open her eyes? She tried lifting her eyelids, but it remained glued shut, as if this impenetrable force was clamping down her eyes, telling her not to look.

A waft of air blew on her chest.

"[Papa! Look at them! Twins!]"

A woman's voice rang out loudly, but her tone was soft and melodic as the sounds of humans floated into her ears.

'...Japanese?'

"[Ah, but one isn't crying.]"

A man's voice rang out this time in front of her as she tried deciphering the words with all her experiences of watching anime for over 10 years. Crying? Did the man just say that 'one isn't crying?' Was he pointing to someone in the room?

She felt her whole world tip over before trying to flail, confusion ringing inside her mind before-

Slap!

"Waaaaaaaaah!"

'What the eff, bro?!'

She felt so sensitive-so...naked!

'Call my lawyer! I will sue you till you don't even have the freedom of speech! Lawyer! Lawyer!'

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalw!" She yelped her syllables that couldn't pop out of her mouth and tried again.

"Wawawawa-"

Something was weird. Very weird.

"[I think we've got ourselves a little weirdo from the get-go!]"

Her butt stung as she tried blinking her eyes, gasping twice and shaking her head to wake her up from this bad dream. Her vision stung the moment she did, lights blinding her as she screamed again, trying to bat away the light with her flimsy small fists. Through her blurry vision, she saw a man grinning from ear to ear before throwing her over his shoulder and patting her on the back. She humped, dry launching from the action as the woman's soft laughter rang from behind as her own eyes closed shut again.

What did she see? She didn't see clearly, but the world was so...colorful.

"[I think I have a name for this little weirdo already!]"

Name? What name? What the hell were these two strangers talking about? And why in the hell was she able to understand Japanese so clearly? And they messed up her pronouns-and-

She tried hard, fighting her clamped eyes, 'Almost there!'

"Sawada Isago! Golden dust for my career!"

Isago slammed his eyes open, blinking rapidly at the man who was now throwing his small body into the air, his golden-amber eyes completely dazzling Isago.

"Waah da dak."

His first words were swear words in English.

She stared absentmindedly out the front porch. No, he stared absentmindedly out the front porch this fine morning. The sky was bright blue while Isago glanced at the buzzing street of Namimori, a small town located at the edges of Japan. In the corner of his eyes, he saw a small bird land on one of the tree branches before someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Isa..go! Let's play!" Tsuna smiled sweetly at his younger brother, holding up his teddy in one hand. They were at the young age of four, Tsuna being born just minutes earlier than Isago. They seemed like twins, but one preferred a shorter hairstyle than the other, and their hair was in different colours.

"Hm...sure! What do you want to play?" Isago answered like how a four-year-old should and pushed himself onto his feet. Tsuna squeezed his teddy, pondering a bit before tilting his head to the side.

Tsuna was exactly the same in the anime, with spiky brown hair and brown eyes that shone brightly in the sun, his soft features held more of some baby fat than what was portrayed in the graphics, but still, Tsuna resembled Vongola Primo.

'Definitely a descendant of the Vongola family,' Isago quirked his lips as Tsuna explained his game of hide and seek, except the purpose was to hide and find teddy.

"Sure!" Isago chirped, holding his hand out for the teddy. "I'll go first then, since you never do, Tsuna."

Tsuna beamed brightly at his younger brother, giving his teddy over before Isago pointed to a wall in the corner of the room and Tsuna plodded over, covering his eyes as he started to count down from 100. Isago smiled slightly, tip-toeing to the washroom and turning on the lights to hide the teddy behind the rows and rows of shampoo bottles in one of the cupboards.

Isago frowned a bit when he realized that he couldn't reach the board, placed the teddy on the table and walked to the toilet that was beside the sink. He stepped onto the toilet, using it as his stepping stone and slammed his small hands onto the table, heaving himself upwards. Snatching the teddy from the original spot, Isago opened the cupboard and organized the bottles as a coverup, arranging the bottles so that not even the ears of the brown toy were visible from an adult's point of view.

Isago stepped down the table, plopping quietly onto his feet before listening to the countdown from Tsuna's mouth at the number 40. Isago smiled carefully, closing the lights as his gold eyes flashed through the mirror once, and Isago made his way to Tsuna's bedroom. Mom was cooking in the kitchen and humming about dad's arrival today.

Isago had retained his father's golden eyes, and yet had a shade of mocha as his hair color. Neither dad nor mom had the hair color, but Nana assumed that it was because her predecessor's hair color was close to black in the past. In contrast to Tsuna's spiky hair, Isago had flatter hair and was long, to the point that it was possible to tie it into a semi-ponytail. He had bangs covering the front in a slanted way, almost completely contrasting to Tsuna's cute and fluffy hair. Well, not that it mattered to Isago.

What was concerning to Isago, was that he was born as a boy.

"Ready or not, here I come!"

Isago heard Tsuna call from the bottom of the stairs before his small footsteps plattered onto the wood. Isago stared momentarily at the door before purposefully closing it and plopping down on Tsuna's bed. The bedsheets ruffled, crinkling a bit and Isago stared at his own crotch.

What the heck, this was so weird to have. It was so tiring to constantly have a thing dangling in between his legs. Even though it didn't hurt or feel uncomfortable, this new addition was a very mind-blowing...experience. Manspreading was also a new thing.

"Isago…?" Tsuna's face peeped into his own room and giggled before skipping over to his brother. "You must have placed teddy here!"

"I don't know," Isago replied with a small smirk. "Why don't you try and find it?"

"Teddy! Teddy!" Tsuna called cutely as if the bear was able to reply back to him.

"Tsuna, if you can find it then I'll ask mom to make your favourite Salisbury steak that she only makes when dad comes home!" Isago called as Tsuna's eyes fired up intensely.

"Steak! Steak! Steak!" Tsuna batted his fists on his crouched knees and started to chant it like some kind of song. Joy could be seen all over his face as he rustled his piles of stuff in the closet, then turned over to his desk and started rummaging in the drawers.

"Steak, steak, steaky, steak-"

Isago smiled secretly, knowing that Tsuna had no knowledge of dad coming home today. Honestly, Isago didn't know what to describe his dad. A good dad? No, he left his wife basically widowed from the moment they were born. A bad dad? You couldn't say that either.

Then again, mama never worked, so it was plausible to think that the house was bought and supplied with money from dad every year. Not to mention that the house was quite large for a family of three. Dad was probably also preparing the house to be the main hideout for the future Vongola.

"Iemitsu Sawada, huh?" Isago murmured his dad's name under his lips.

There was a reason why his dad stationed his family near the unknown town of Namimori. It was probably in order to protect them from the mafia. So in the end, was he a good dad? Isago watched Tsuna's fluffy hair swish in the lights as the sound of tires echoed into the neighborhood.

Isago lifted his eyebrows at the sound, turning his head to Tsuna's open window to see a short black car parked a few meters away from the Sawada residence. Isago stood up slowly, walking towards the window and hopped onto a small step box and leaned on the wall, crossing his arms together as he peered outside.

"Tsuna, let's rank this game harder. You have exactly 100 seconds like the countdown to find your teddy, or else the promise is off," Isago turned to Tsuna who's eyes widened like saucers, gasping before throwing his hands into the depths of his drawers.

"That's not fair, Isago!" The boy whimpered as Isago started to count the numbers from 100, forcing the small boy to sweat. Inside, Isago spotted a blond head popping out of the driver's seat.

The man was wearing orange overalls that were only pulled onto his waist. His dirty sweatshirt was worn in a fashion that showed his armpit hair clearly even from far away. The sight was disgusting.

"Men," Isago made a face, recognizing that it was his father. "66...67...68...69…"

"Isago! Slow down!" Tsuna wailed and rummaged through his toy box, tears streaming down his face at the decreasing numbers. Iemitsu pulled a construction hat out of the front side, then walked to the passenger's seat, opening the door to reveal another man wearing a blue vacation shirt with pink flowers on it.

The man stepped out of the car, smiling widely at his assistant who passed him a straw hat. As if the man noticed, his eyes flashed to the window, meeting the gaze of Isago. There was curiosity and wonder that passed through the male's eyes, but then greeted the child by lifting his hat and giving a salute which Isago returned with a polite nod.

'Vongola ninth,' Isago addressed the man quickly, curling his lips at the status before turning back to Tsuna, the numbers ending with the last count of zero.

"Isaaaagoo!" Tsuna sobbed into his long-sleeved sweater, sniffing as the sleeve soaked up his snot. "I couldn't find it-I'm sorry!"

Isago's eyes softened at the small boy, hopping down from the stepping box before crouching next to Tsuna who was on his knees.

"Tsuna, Tsuna, why are you sorry?" Isago patted Tsuna on the shoulders. Tsuna threw his arm down, staring at Isago who had a soft smile on his face.

"Be-because Isago's favorite...also steak…" the young boy blew his wet cheeks and Isago chuckled, pulling his brother into a large hug. That was not exactly true, Isago's favourite was sweet parfaits rather than savory main course meals, but Nana had never brought the two to a sweets cafe so Isago had made up his preferences to match Tsuna's.

"How about this, I'll magically transform the steak onto the table if you promise me one thing," Isago patted Tsuna who blew into his shoulder. Momentarily, Isago made a face of disgust, but once thinking that they were from the same blood, a smile was forcefully plastered onto his soft features.

Tsuna also realized his own misdoings, instantly freezing before wiping his own sleeve on Isago's shoulder, trying to correct the snot, only to make it smear even wider on the hoodie.

"I'll have to change my clothes," Isago sighed before pushing Tsuna away and walking to his own room. Tsuna followed like an abandoned puppy. His two fingers fiddled as he watched Isago pull his T-shirt off, and grabbed a random sweater before pulling it over his head.

"Mm sorry Isago…" Tsuna trailed off, staring guilty on the ground as Isago's head emerged out. "I will promise anything that you want! Forever!"

'What a dangerous promise, Tsuna,' Isago's eyes glimmered before turning towards his brother. The shadows in his room casted upon Isago's face as his grin widened almost too maliciously.

"Then promise me Tsuna, no matter what the circumstance you must not harm me. If you do, then our relationship as brothers are over." Isago's hair fell over his eyes as he brushed it back, getting a clear look at the boy's small face.

"Harm?" Tsuna tilted his head curiously at the word, repeating to make sure he pronounced it correctly. "What's that?"

"It means that I will be gone from your life forever, Tsuna," Isago's voice deepen with glee at the horror that flashed through the boy's face. Tsuna's hands instantly clutched the sides of his shorts, shaking his head furiously.

"I will never harm you! I will never! Never!"

"Good," Isago walked closer to his dear brother, jerking his thumb under Tsuna's teary eyes. The young boy looked fragile and broken at Isago's words, almost as if he couldn't imagine living without Isago.

"Because I love you so much that it may serve as a double-edged sword to both of us," Isago gave little Tsuna a small peck on his cheeks, smirking at Tsuna's pouting face as his fingers clutched the edges of Isago's sweater.

"I wove you too," Tsuna buried his face into his brother's sweater, murmuring the phrase until the front door was pushed open and mama's clear voice rang through the house, calling the two boys down.

It was true, Tsuna was a precious little brother to Isago, even if Tsuna was legally the older one. But that didn't matter in front of power. If Tsuna stood in the way of succession, then Isago would cut off Tsuna's arms and legs to prevent Tsuna from overtaking the throne. That was how cold-hearted Isago was.

But then again, was Isago able to do it?

That's why Isago would give Tsuna the choice. He would not harm Tsuna until his own brother decided that Isago was a threat to the family and his life. He would let Tsuna break their relationship, and make him wallow in despair. As long as Tsuna loved him, Isago would let him go. But if Tsuna disobeyed, then everything will be over.

"Come on, brother," Isago gestured towards the door, stepping forward with Tsuna holding him. When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Iemitsu was grinning at both boys, arms extended.

"Weirdo Isago! TsunaTsuna! Papa is back home!"

The two boys huddled over to their papa, Tsuna waddling towards him while Isago was pulled into a large embrace, dad's hand ruffling in his hair as Isago grinned at the man. The smell of sweat and tobacco filled Isago's nostrils, instantly making him suppress a sour face at his own father. Mama giggled at the family reunion while Isago's eyes trailed to her, gesturing for a group hug.

"Oh, dear!" Mama threw herself into the group hug and Iemitsu kissed her sloppily on the cheeks, rubbing her face with fondness. It was then Tsuna noticed a stranger behind dad, smiling sweetly at the family after Tsuna opened his mouth with quivering fear.

"Oh, Tsuna! Don't worry, this is Timoteo-" Dad looked over at the grandfather figure, releasing all of us as he gestured politely at the man. "-My boss."

"Welcome!" Nana grinned, lowering her body into a 90-degree bow. "Thank you for taking care of my husband all this time!"

Isago glanced towards his mom, then followed, repeating the same words of thanks. Tsuna only stood there, confused and not knowing what to do and hid behind his mother, clutching her apron.

"Tsuna!" Mom bickered with a sigh but smiled soon afterwards. She patted me on the head as a 'good job' before apologizing for her son's imprudence.

"That isn't a problem," Timoteo said, softening his eyes at us before crouching down to our eye level. "I have to thank you for having such a wonderful father that I can trust."

'Of course, you're literally naming his son as successor,' Isago thought bitterly before pulling Tsuna out from behind mom. 'So who is it going to be? Tsuna, or me?'

Vongola ninth had to choose between the two of them because they were the only ones that would be left in the Vongola bloodline. If what Isago remembered was correct, there was more than one successor to the Vongola line, but they all died, which left Tsuna being the only one that could inherit the family.

Tsuna's hand started to quake before Isago squeezed it reassuringly, giving him a small nudge. Tsuna was still hesitating so Isago started first.

"I'm Isago, this is Tsuna, my older brother!" He deliberately said, lowering his head as Tsuna, this time, followed his younger brother's lead.

"Oh, he's the older one, huh?" Timoteo turned his gentle gaze towards the older brother and nodded. Isago pleaded that they were going to leave the throne of successor to the worthy, not the older. Isago was going to prove himself worthy, prove himself, to be a better leader than his brother.

Tsuna was not suited as a leader, maybe in the long run of taking care of his family members, yes, but Isago was more of a leader in the expanding and influential way.

'Give the role of successor to me, and I will hold Vongola to its glory. I will make Vongola the strongest in history, and it will flourish more than the past ten generations combined.'

Isago wanted the Vongola position. He wanted it desperately.

As if Timoteo could hear Isago's thoughts, the grandfather's eyes turned to the younger sibling, staring at him hard. Isago didn't move his eyes, only stared back and tried to convey the message through his gaze.

'Give it to me, I want it. I need it.'

Timoteo's gaze deepened, opening his mouth to say something as conflict passed through his face, then clamped his mouth shut. Iemitsu, sensing that something was sort of amidst, invited his boss into the house, telling the group that he was famished. Nana gasped, pardoning her forgetfulness before guiding the guest to the table.

Isago let go of the breath he held inside, looking towards Tsuna who was staring at the grandfather.

[missionkitty]

Obey Me! - You Owe Me A Dance (Mammon/Reader)

You sat on your bed, tiredly rubbing your eyes. Your alarm had gone off at what seemed like the least opportune time because you were having that  dream again.

“...Yo. Um, like...you know… Uh, I mean, like...uh…”

You were closer to the end of the dream this time. Well, you were closer to what you hoped was the end of the dream.

“L-like, you’ve gotta have weird tastes to ask a human like you to dance. I’m guessin’ no one here’s gonna do that, huh? Ahahahaha!”

It seemed like it was so long ago now, and you kept trying to tell yourself that it didn’t matter that much, but...you were still bitter about that night at Lord Diavolo’s inter-realm retreat. Mammon was being his usual self, trying to play it cool despite asking you to dance, but Lucifer decided to steal you away to intimidate you.

“...So y’know, as long as you don’t have a partner, I guess I could maybe go ahead and pair up with you for a li’l bit.”

At the time, you weren’t terribly disappointed, though you would have preferred dancing with Mammon to getting your hand crushed by Lucifer. But months after the fact, after spending so much time with Mammon and learning about him, you were upset that since then...you’ve never gotten another chance to dance with him.

Especially since you’ve been having this dream almost every night for the last week.

That evening at Lord Diavolo’s castle was hauntingly magical. It was the first time you had ever seen everyone in their demon forms at the same time. You had already seen Levi and Lucifer before, after that disastrous TSL trivia contest. But it was the first time you had seen Mammon like that up close.

Your heart started to race as you recalled his exposed chest and the black leather he wore. His dark skin contrasted with the white markings on his body. His toned muscles shifting as he fidgeted in front of you…

You quickly and furiously shook your head, trying to derail this current train of thought. You blamed it on being tired, and decided to get ready for class. You remembered that Mammon had a test today that you had been helping him study for, and while you weren’t taking it, you were still nervous for him. His track record thus far wasn’t great. He tended to be lazy or indisposed by a trio of witches, so that left several obstacles in getting him to retain the information he needed to pass his classes.

This last time the two of you had been buckled down particularly hard, finding creative ways to keep Mammon motivated and begging his brothers to find a way to occupy his blackmailing witches. If he passed this test, it would ensure that he did at least pass this one class. Small victories, right?

As you got dressed, your mind wandered one last time to Mammon standing in front of you, dressed in his demon form. You allowed yourself one more small smile before finishing preparing for the day.

 ***

You waited nervously outside the door of Mammon’s classroom, standing next to your nervous guardian. Usually the tests were graded later, but Lucifer put in a request for Mammon’s to be graded immediately.

Mammon looked back at you, the anxiety clear on his face. He had told you that he was tired of failing for once, and hoped that at least this class would be wrapped up in a nice bow. He fidgeted, crossing his arms, uncrossing them, and playing with the two rings on his right hand.

“It’ll be okay,” you said, placing a hand on Mammon’s arm. “We studied like crazy, and you passed the practice test Satan made for us.”

“You know, I gotta thank you…” Mammon murmured, looking back at you. He seemed a little surprised by your touch at first, but kind of leaned into it after a moment.

Mammon was interrupted by the door to the classroom opening, Lucifer poking his head out.

“Mammon,” he said calmly, motioning for him to come in.

Your fidgety guardian gave you a worried look before following Lucifer back into the classroom.

Mammon’s nerves had suddenly passed on to you, and you anxiously began crossing your arms, hoping for the best.

The anxious silence was suddenly broken by a loud, raucous cheering from inside the classroom. You whirled around, hearing Mammon shout happily and then race out of the room. He had a wildly excited look on his face and clutched his test in his hand.

“Ninety percent, baby!” Mammon howled.

“Ninety percent!” You found yourself yelling as well.

“Oh, you beautiful, big-brained human!” He practically slammed into you as he picked you up in a hug and whirled you around. It took a moment for him to realize the scene he was making as other demons began to stop in the hallway and stare. Mammon quickly set you down as his face went from brown to dark red and he took several steps back.

“U-uh...I mean,” he began stammering.

You looked back at him, smiling and gently laughing. He might have been embarrassed, but you were wildly proud of him.

“Meet me at my room later!” Mammon said loudly, but then making a choked grunt. “I mean--maybe I’ll be there! Whatever, just...wait for me there! Near my room!”

Mammon raced off, his face incredibly flushed. He excitedly jumped one more time before he vanished around the corner.

You laughed again, placing your hands on your hips. It was never dull with him around.

Your thoughts drifted back to your dream.

“I guess I could maybe go ahead and pair up with you for a li’l bit.”

You could feel your cheeks flush slightly.

"Thank you for helping him," Lucifer said, suddenly behind you. His deep voice made you jump, but you turned to face him.

"You're welcome," you replied, your voice shaking slightly from the surprise.

"With your help, the student council will retain some respectability yet."

You could only respond with a smile before bidding Lucifer good afternoon and walking off. The image of Mammon asking you to dance was still fresh in your mind.

 ***

 You weren't outside of Mammon's room for long before he came bounding up, his test still in his hand. You guessed he had probably been announcing to everyone else his remarkable test grade before finally ending up in his room.

"Good! You're here!" He said cheerfully. His joy was almost palpable with how big his smile was. "Come inside!"

You followed him inside his room, and as soon as the door was shut, he picked you up in a big hug again.

You didn't mind the hug at all, but you were certainly surprised by his display of affection.

"I was serious earlier, you know," he said, setting you back down on the ground. "This was thanks to you." Mammon waved the test in his hand. "It's one less thing for Lucifer to hassle me about, and I haven't heard from those witches all week. I feel like I could take anyone down now!"

You laughed at Mammon's eager attitude, but shook your head.

"Don't get ahead of yourself," you said. "We've still got the rest of the year ahead of us."

"Ah, don't be such a buzzkill!" Mammon said, leaning toward you and putting his hands on his hips. You gave him an unimpressed look, and he sighed. "Yeah, yeah...you're right. But still."

"But still...that doesn't mean we can't celebrate," you added, smiling. You didn't want him to get his hopes up too high, but you were definitely proud of him.

Mammon's eyes widened again and his huge grin returned to his face. He took a deep breath and his cheeks flushed.

"You know, that's kinda why I asked you to come here. I don't like owin' debts, and I want to thank you for helping me with my latest...victory."

"You could just get me a cake or dinner or something," you said, laughing and shaking your head. You didn't mind helping Mammon and you didn't feel like he owed you anything.

“No way! A win this big has GOTTA be celebrated in a BIG way!” Mammon shook his head incredulously and leaned in close to you. “Just think about it for a while! We’ll plan it for the weekend! You and me, on the town!”

You started laughing again, nodding.

“Okay, okay, I’ll think about it!” You relented, Mammon giving the toothiest grin you’ve probably ever seen before in response.

The dream is still fresh in your mind. You bite the inside of your lip, wondering if you should say anything about it. Mammon noticed your suddenly-pensive expression and realization flashes over his face.

“You do have something in mind! Well, c’mon, you can tell the Great Mammon! The sky’s the limit--and it’ll even be on me! How’s that for celebrating?” Mammon stood up straight and crossed his arms. His expression was cocky, like he’d actually discerned your thoughts.

And he wasn’t wrong, you did have something on your mind, but it wasn’t about any future celebration. Maybe…? Maybe this could be your chance to finish the dream.

You stayed silent for a moment longer while Mammon started to fidget uncomfortably.

“...Dancing,” you finally responded, your cheeks flushing. “I want to go dancing.”

“Dancing? For real?” Mammon said, tilting his head to the side before smiling devilishly. “Well, I never really pegged ya for the kind to go clubbin’ or whatever, but I like it! But how about this--” Mammon said with a laugh. “We’ll go to the human realm! I’ve hit all the clubs down here in the Devildom plenty, so I’m feelin’ a different venue.”

“The human realm?” You ask curiously. Last you had heard, everyone besides Lucifer, Barbatos, and Lord Diavolo had to get permission to use the portal to the human realm because of Mammon.

“Don’t you worry about the details. Leave it to THE Mammon!” Mammon laughed raucously. “I’ll get us there and back safely, I promise!”

You shrugged and nodded. If worse came to worse, you’d just spend the weekend in the Devildom, maybe go to a Devildom club with Mammon. There were a few days between now and the weekend, so there was time to change plans if things didn’t work out. At least he wasn’t trying to steal anything from Lord Diavolo’s castle.

 ***

 The rest of the week passed pretty quietly, and you heard nothing from Mammon about plans being changed. You also continued to have the same dream about Mammon, asking you to dance. It ached to get so close every time, but it also made you start admitting some things about how you felt about him.

Of course he was good-looking, and charming when he decided to be. You saw plenty of that in your dreams every night. But...there was more.

You would find yourself just daydreaming about him during class, or when you had any downtime. You missed his company more and more when he disappeared, and relished when he was close to you. His loud, excited voice and attitude were comforting now. The way he would eagerly grab your hand, pulling you someplace.

Your blush returned often while you daydreamed, and in the depths of them, you found you were incredibly excited to take a trip with him into the human realm, to a human club. At the very least, chances were much lower that someone would try to eat you. And you would have Mammon, your faithful guardian with you. You’d return back to the Devildom in relatively good shape.

Finally, the day was here. You weren’t sure how Mammon was able to persuade Lucifer or Lord Diavolo to let him travel to the human realm with you. You weren’t sure the way you’d be traveling to the human realm was legitimate at all. That would be a problem when Lucifer found out, but...you’d been through worse things than that at this point.

Mammon told you to wait outside of the House of Lamentation and to “wear something good.” You weren’t sure what he meant by that, but he said it so fast before running off that you couldn’t even see if he realized what he had said. You proceeded to be kind of embarrassed by it, but moved on and decided to just wear something nice. In your heart, you hoped that you would find your chance to finally dance with Mammon.

You hadn’t told anyone about the dream. You weren’t sure if the others would just end up teasing you or asking if your head was on straight. The thought of even telling Mammon made your ears burn like crazy.

Before you could get too lost in your thoughts, Mammon raced out of the House and grabbed your hand.

“Hey! Glad you’re here! Let’s go!” Mammon said frantically, with a strange object in his hand. “No time to really explain, so c’mon!”

You had no choice but to follow Mammon, his strength much higher than yours, and ran alongside him to one of the portals further into the Devildom.

“Okay, here we go!” Mammon said excitedly, holding up the object to the portal. It opened, and Mammon pulled you close, jumping through.

There was a flash, and suddenly you found yourself standing on a beach, still close to Mammon. You looked up at him, not entirely sure where you were. He was simply smiling, looking ahead. The sun was starting to set, and you felt your breath catch in your throat as you looked in the same direction as he did.

You clutched Mammon’s jacket and let your mouth hang slightly agape as you watched the sunlight color the evening sky for the first time in a while. You had gotten so used to the perpetual dark, twilight sky of the Devildom, that watching the sun set over the ocean was like seeing a miracle.

You could hear Mammon chuckle as he rubbed your back.

“Nice, huh? I had a feeling you might have been missing this kinda view.”

You looked back at him, noticing the faint blush on his cheeks. He had a big, toothy grin and he adjusted his yellow sunglasses.

“Where are we, Mammon?” You ask, slightly pulling yourself away from him after realizing how tightly you were gripping his jacket. Your cheeks burned slightly.

“Welcome, or as the locals say, bem vindo, to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil,” Mammon said, stepping back and grandly gesturing with his arms.

Mammon brought you to Brazil? You didn’t have any expectations, but Brazil was not among them. You let out a disbelieving laugh.

“I know, I know, it’s probably kind of weird, but I wanted to take you someplace special," he continued, placing his hands on his hips. “Also, we can get lost in here pretty easily in case Lucifer realizes what I did…”

That strange object. It must have allowed Mammon to use the portal, but you had a pretty strong feeling that Mammon was not allowed to have it.

“Okay, come on, no more questions, let’s go!” Mammon said, laughing loudly and grabbing your hand again. “I know just the place to eat, and then we’ll hit the club!”

You couldn’t help but laugh again. You weren’t sure you had ever seen Mammon this truly self-assured before. Sure, he always had an act going on, but here in the human world with just the two of you? It was real.

You followed him more confidently this time, letting him lead you to a cab, where you both got in. You made a very loud mental note of the way Mammon had his arm wrapped around you as you both sat in the cab. What surprised you next was the fluid way Mammon spoke Portuguese to the driver.

As you thought about it, it made sense that he would be able to speak Portuguese, or any language, for that matter. He was a demon, and it’s not like he would be bound by any kind of human language limitations. It was probably like second nature to him, but you found it impressive all the same.

Before you could admire Mammon for much longer, the cab sped off and drove like wild. It weaved in and out of traffic, turning hard and accelerating faster than you ever thought an average car would. However, as your body tried swaying with the inertia of the car, Mammon kept you locked in place next to him. Your stomach did a few somersaults every time you leaned into Mammon as the car turned. The longer you spent next to him, the more you began to notice how he smelled like ginger.

The cab stopped perhaps too soon for your liking, and Mammon helped you out of the car.

Dinner passed like a whirlwind, and while the food was delicious, you couldn’t tear your attention away from Mammon. It was like he was a completely different person away from the Devildom. There was merit to him being the Avatar of Greed. You don’t get in the pockets of the rich and powerful without the kind of poise and confidence he currently had. You marvelled at how much his brothers had the ability to color his whole personality while he was around them.

Before you knew it, Mammon had taken you from dinner and to a club deeper downtown. He got both of you in easily, and led you to a crowded dance floor. You instinctively clung to his jacket again and he wrapped his arm around you, much to your secret delight.

“Stay close,” he said in your ear. The smell of ginger was stronger on his breath, almost intoxicating. You quickly began to realize why demons were so good at seducing and tempting people. Thankfully, that was not Mammon’s plan tonight. Well, intentionally, anyway. Butterflies raged in your stomach as you were pressed up against him.

You got close to the middle of the floor when Mammon turned you slightly against his body so you were now facing him. It was overwhelming being around so many people so suddenly, but looking up at Mammon’s familiar white hair and dark skin eased your anxiety. However, now you became acutely aware of the swaying from all the other people dancing around you.

The music playing was loud and rhythmic, but in the heat of the moment, you weren’t quite sure how to move.

Mammon slid his hand a little lower down your back and took your hand in his other. You felt him slightly nudge your arm, which was kind of lamely clutching his jacket. You took that cue to slide your hand around to his back like his was on yours.

“Follow me,” he said in your ear once again.

Like magnets, your bodies were pressed together and then Mammon began to sway and move his feet to the rhythm. It took you a moment to get used to the fluidity of his movements, but it was easy to follow and fall into step with him.

You had been so focused on copying Mammon’s movements that you hadn’t quite processed just how close you were to him now. His body was firm and warm against yours. The way he moved sent sparks through your body. You almost didn’t recognize this demon in front of you, the way he appeared so confident and strong.

Was this the ending of your dream? Would this have been the way you felt had Lucifer not interrupted?

You smiled at Mammon, noticing that he looked down at you with those remarkable blue-to-yellow eyes of his. Even through his glasses, they were breathtaking--almost like the sunset over the ocean you had witnessed with him.

No. This wouldn’t have been the outcome that night at Lord Diavolo’s. What was happening now was something very special and intimate between the two of you. He wouldn’t be this way if he was around his brothers--but just with you, no space between? This was a product of all the time you had spent with him, watching him, learning about him. And it seemed like he had done the same for you. It felt so natural to have him hold you so closely, like he had known you for far longer than a few months.

Mammon’s cheeks turned more pink the longer you looked into each others’ eyes. He gave a smile before suddenly resting the side of his head against yours, the music changing to something slower. The swaying slowed with the music, but it felt like Mammon held you that much closer. He squeezed your hand and slid his hand further up your back. As your chests were pressed up against each others’, you could feel Mammon’s heart racing. Yours was going at a similar speed.

The warmth from his skin was energizing and relaxing all at the same time. You could hear him hum along with the music every so often, his baritone voice vibrating in his chest. You danced like this for a while, savoring his smell and proximity well past your legs' limit. You guessed that Mammon could probably still go for a while longer, but you were no demon.

You rubbed his back, wanting to get his attention. He gently lifted his head away from yours and looked back at you. You motioned away from the dance floor with your head, hoping Mammon would understand what you meant. He nodded, and carefully led you off the floor, holding you close.

“Can we get some air?” You finally asked once you got far enough away from the music and chatter.

“Yeah, that sounds pretty good right now,” Mammon replied. His arm was wrapped around your back and he led you up some stairs in the club until he found a less crowded area that led out to a balcony. There weren’t many people around up in the upper levels, and you quickly settled on an empty corner of the balcony to rest. As you both settled into the spot, watching the lights of the city, Mammon began to pull away from you.

Instinctively, you grabbed his arm and looked back at him with a pleading stare.

Mammon’s cheeks flushed as he looked back at your own flushed face and after a moment of contemplation, he began to return his arm to your side, but continued to move until he was behind you. He wrapped both of his arms around your torso and settled his chin in the crook of your neck.

“Is this okay?” He whispered, his voice shaking slightly in your ear.

Electricity crackled in your veins as Mammon held you close against his chest. You placed your hands on his and gently stroked his thumb.

“It is,” you replied quietly.

You both fell into silence again. You closed your eyes and focused on Mammon’s breathing as his chest rose and fell against your back.

“Mammon...do you remember that night at Lord Diavolo’s? When you tried asking me to dance?” You asked, your heart starting to pound harder in your chest.

“Yeah.” His voice was husky.

“I’ve...I’ve been dreaming about that night a lot lately.” You figured you had nothing to lose by telling him now, with how close he was to you.

“Is that why you told me you wanted to go dancing?” Mammon buried his nose in your hair after he spoke.

“I guess so.”

“Huh…” he said breathily. “That’s interesting.”

Mammon released his arms from around you and turned you around to face him again. He looked back at you, cheeks flushed, with an intense gaze.

“Because I’ve been having the same dream. It always ends before I can just grab your hand.”

Staring into his eyes again, you felt your breath catch in your throat. There’s no way he was having the same dream as you, you tried telling yourself. But his eyes were so sincere. He had no one to impress here, and you realized that you had always loved him no matter what.

“I know when we go back to the Devildom, I’m going to have to share you with my brothers again, whether I like it or not. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to be greedy now and keep you out with me for as long as possible,” Mammon said in a low voice. “There’s no Lucifer here to take you from me again.”

He slowly caressed your cheek with his hand, resting it on the side of your face. He inched his lips closer to yours. The electricity in your veins turned into a constant, warm flood as you also closed the distance to his lips.

“Please only be mine,” he whispered before pressing his lips to yours. You were surprised as he quickly introduced his tongue, brushing past your lips and exploring further. You returned the favor, which seemed to startle him at first, but afterwards energized his kiss.

You both pulled away after a long moment, slightly out of breath and holding each other close.

“Can I...take that as a yes?” Mammon said with a laugh and smile.

You nodded and smiled in return.

“Good,” he murmured, returning to your lips and kissing you gently. “Because I'm going to need more of this.”

[endydancer1]

We used to be strangers | Part 1

Pairing: Tom Holland x Y/N Lincoln

Summary: Tom has just finished his latest movie and is heading back home to London. While he is passing the high building, suddenly something happens what changes his life completely. What is the shadow up there?

WARNING: Mentions of injuries, blood, depression and thinking of suicide.

....................................

Y/N POV:

"Mrs. Lincoln, can you examine this patient, please? He came here about 20 minutes ago and I haven't found any other doctor who isn't at the operating theathre at the moment. Are you free now? " an older nurse asked me.

I just simply nodded. I looked at the boy standing in front of me. The boy wasn't older than 8. He was sobbing. His eyes were all red and about to start watering again any minute. He was holding his left arm rubbing it gently. Poor little boy. A reassuring smile appeared on my face. I crunched in front of him and looked at him.

"Hi. My name is Dr. Y/N. What's your name? "

"R-Ryan. " he said quietly with his lips trembling.

"So Ryan, is your mum with you?"

"Y-yea.. She.. She is at the toilet. "

"Okey, so come with me, I'll take a look at your injury and the nurse will send your mum to my ambulance as soon as she comes out the toilet,okey?"

He shyly nodded and followed me into my doctor's office.

" Ryan.. Sit down, please. Tell me, what has happened to you? "

" I-I.. We were playing hide and seek in the park.. And.. I tripped over a tree root and when I fell, I hurt my arm. " he sobbed again.

" Oh, I see. Can you show me your arm?" I asked him politely, because I saw how nervous and scared he was. He mumbled something like yes. I couldn't hear him properly. I examined his arm. It was only  a bit swollen with a large, dark bruise.

I told him to use ice pack on it. I also gave him a lollipop and with a small smile on my face I took him out to waiting room. Behind the door, Ryan's mum was waiting there for him to take him home. When they left, I went back to my office. I felt really tired. I had been up for like 32 hours. The night was really rough. Lots of injuries, cuts, blood was literally everywhere. I was sitting in my chair, eyes closed. I recall everything from previous night. A man in his late twenties with skull fructure, drunk girl with open leg fructure, some deep cuts, bloody injuries. Blood was everywhere. Even in my dreams. I had been doctor for just a few years and still the blood scared me. Not that I mind seeing blood, but it hunted me in my dreams, in my thoughts. I saw so many injuries in your life, after only 3 years as a doctor, I thought I had seen everything. Every time I closed my eyes, I heard someone screaming, I saw blood everywhere, cuts, bruises. It was so... Familiar, but still so.. Strange? Unknown? I don't know. One thing I know for sure is, that I hated to close my eyes. Especially, when I was home alone.

A knock on the door snapped me from my thoughts, from daydreaming (should I really call it daydreaming?). I opened my eyes slowly.

"Come in! "

The door slowly opened and a head with dark hair and brow eyes popped out. A warm smile appeared on his face.

"Hey, Dr. Y/N. Are you okey? "

It was Dr. Melendez. He was about 10 years older than me, Mexican, good-looking and in a good shape. I sighed and looked at him.

"No.. I am just tired. Thanks for asking." I smiled a little. He came to me and rubbed my shoulder.

"You should go home. Your shift is at the end. Go home, take a shower and rest. You've made a great job previous night. Now, you can go. You need to rest."

He was always kind to me. Yeah, he was bit mean in some ways, especially to residents, but if you knew him better, spent some time with him, you would know he is a good doctor and good person, in some ways.

I just simply nodded and stand up. I packed my things, still thinking about the blood and injuries. Melendez was still there, watching me. Sometimes, I felt like he actually...like me, maybe? Probably not. He was just casually... staring. I hung my scrub and put on denim jacket.

"Thanks, Dr. Melendez. See you soon. Bye." I smiled and waved him. I walked out of my office to waiting room. I said goodbye to nurses. I was slowly walking to the entrance, when I heard someone screaming code blue. I signed. Not again. I quickly ran out of the hospital. Don't get me wrong, I love helping people, but not right now. Fortunately, Melendez was there for them.

I was walking along the street, passing by the strangers. I stopped and looked around. There were many happy couples holding hands, kissing, hugging. Anxiety went through my body, I was shivering, my lips were trembling, tears started to falling down. I quickly ran to the end of the street stopping only near the high building. I didn't know who was living there. But I knew these walls, the brick on it, the roof so well. I spent most of the time there, trying to end MY time. I took a hard breathe and opened the front door. It was dark inside. Only a green neon light with the exit sigh was blinking a little. I pushed myself and started to walking up the stairs. When I was on the fourth floor, I pushed big brown door in the corner of the hall. The sigh on them said DO NOT ENTER, but it was always opened, so why should I kept myself away from the door? I had to hit the door hard with my arm at first, because it was a bit stucked. I opened the door and went inside. I closed quietly and sprinted up the staircase. The roof of the building appeared in front of me. The beautiful blue sky, shining sun, a gentle breeze. I inhaled it and walked over to the edge of the building. As always, I wanted to end it. End it all. In a second, everything would be away, I would be dead and no one would really care. The tips of fingers on my feet were hunging in the air. I looked down on the street. There are lots of people there. They are just... passing. Not paying any attention! They are chatting, laughing, not noticing someone is up there. Many things went through my mind. Everything what had happened in my life. I was flustrated, sad, angry. I hated myself. Deep inside me I wanted to had never been born. I was ready to jump.

Tom POV:

"Aaand.. Cut! Great job guys, I am proud of you. That was the last scene, so congrats to all of you. We've made it! You deserve a little vocation after these rough months. So go home, rest a bit. I'll see you next Saturday on the Wrap party. See you soon guys! " director said to us with a wide smile. All of us started clapping. Then we all went to our trailers to pack our stuff. It was strange feeling to go away after months of hard work,knowing I wouldn't meet anyone from the crew everyday. I felt kinda sad, but also relieved that I can spend some time with my friends and family having fun and chilling at home or in the nature. I needed this vacation.

I packed all my stuff, thinking about taking a nap at home and maybe going to pub later that night with Haz, Tuwaine and Harry. A knock on the door snapped me back to reality.

"Come in!" I shouted not turning around to whoever was behind the door.

"Hey Tom, I've just wanted to say goodbye, mate. I am leaving this evening. But I hope we will see each other in a few weeks. Come to US and we will party."

It was Zendaya. She laughed and hugged me saying goodbye. I will miss her the most from all of these people. She is like my sister.

" I'll miss you. Sure, I will be in the US as soon as possible. "I chuckled and hugged her back. When she was leaving she waved me and then went to the airport. I took my stuff and went outside. I wanted to walk a bit on the fresh air. I texted Harrison, that I was on my way home and then started walking among the streets. I was staring at my phone, scrolling the Instagram, not paying any attention to the surrounding world. Maybe it was a mistake, because I bumped into few people. I apologized and rather put my phone into the pocket of my jeans. It was really nice day. Sun was shining, birds were singing. I looked at the sky. I had to narrow my eyes, because the sun was shining really brightly. It thought that I saw someone standing on the edge of the building for a second. Well, I couldn't tell it was a person for sure. Maybe it was just a bird ... Or just a shadow.

[hackink]

Step Dad

A short story

I hear thrashing and screaming, I yearned for it to end, never did. That quite sucks not gonna lie.

I'm the big one, it's like I'm the chosen one in my family, could be both good or bad. I've got to take care of my siblings, like all the time. The big responsibilities always point in my direction. It's not all bad, I do have my fair share of fun. But for that same reason, I must set a good example. I can't really act the way I wanna most of the time, usually I've make-up on my face, covering the skin before it. It's kinda complicated.

This one time, my parents came into my room, they introduced me to someone, he was a tall white man, and was fairly well clothed. He was wearing these really nice shoes, and had a suit on that looked like it cost buck. I shook his big hand, it felt soft, and a bit warming. We talked for about 30 minutes, he was a fairly nice person, and my parents seemed to like him as well.

After that time was over, my dad went to the room, and grabbed some suitcases out from the closet, as he rolled them by, I felt my heart drop. They explained everything.

Quickly, I put my make-up on, before it was too late, it was. Once I saw my little brother and sister hugging the leg of my dad, begging him to stay, I washed it off naturally. 'Who is he to take the place of my dad?' This thought lingered in my head that night, I took some sleeping pills.

I avoided the man, I didn't want to talk to him, if I saw my mother close to him, I'd turn my head, cause I know how violent I can get. There was this one time, where I walked into the kitchen to get a snack, was playing Minecraft with my siblings, and there I saw the two, hugging and kissing. I, at that moment, remembered how my dad taught me to drive, how he taught me to build a nice dog house for our pet dog, which had died upon my dad's exit. I remembered every single second I spent with my father, the amazing role model he was, and snapped.

Back in the 8th grade, one of my good friends was playing bloody knuckles with someone. He totaled him. He then turned to me, and held his fist up, I didn't last two punches. He told me to start punching the walls at home, bit by bit, so that it wouldn't hurt and my fists would become stronger. In two months' time, my knuckles along with my punches, had become stronger than most boys in my school. I beat my friend, the only time I did too, cause he trained after that as well, and became much better than me. Though, I did beat just about anyone in school at bloody knuckles.

I clenched my fist, and I dropped my phone. This man was innocent, I just hated the fact that he wanted to replace the man who could never be replaced, ever. I felt like letting him know. I had never punched anything as hard as I could, since it'd probably be the end of my fist, but boy do I gotta say his cheek was soft. He fell to the ground and hit the stove with his head, my mom started to scream and push me back, each little shove she gave me, let me know how much she liked this man. They all hurt. I hadn't seen her do that with my dad in the past year, and he gets to do it in the first week? I couldn't settle with that, I ran out the house, and went to my grandma's house, where I began punching the tree in order to not break down in tears.

She gave me some hot cocoa, and let me spend the night there. She felt like she always had, like my grandma, so I felt comfortable, silently I sobbed. The next morning I got up and took a shower, my hands had a bunch of wounds in them from punching the tree bare fisted, and they really hurt to clean. They were also shaking, 'maybe I cracked a bone or something?' I didn't really care, my adrenaline wasn't going down anytime soon.

I was taking a jog outside around the house to clear my mind, when I see a tall man, with some really nice shoes, and a bruise on his cheek come by. 'Your mother sent me to get you.' I ignored him, for his sake. He sat down in a chair, and patted next to him, signaling for me to take a seat. I was thinking it was a bad pun, was he here to mock me? His face was so infuriating, the fact that it wasn't six feet under was pissing me off. On my next lap around the house, I kicked his chair over, his suit looked expensive. He smiled and chuckled, 'kids these days are quite funny.' Why? He must be a psycho, my reaction would be to get mad, or confused at least!

He began to jog alongside me, this man was starting to tick me off big time. I stopped running, grabbed his tie, and said 'Get out, and I mean out, you lay another finger on my mom and I'll kill you!' I tripped him, and continued my jog. I'd feel guilty, but I can't for someone who got my father kicked out of the house, nobody deserves to live after screwing with my family.

I returned home later that day, still a tad hesitant because of the incidents the day prior. My mom asked me to help her cook, she was making shrimp. She gave me the basic rundown of what she had going, and started cutting vegetables off to the side, we started talking about the usual, how much I annoyed her, and how my siblings were idiots. I hear the door open, and I get ready for disappointment, 'Hello everybody!!' it's a... playful voice?

'Where's my food you peasants?' My eyes lighten up, followed by tears. I rush over to hug my dad, started to sob in his arms. He had a black bag, that had chips in it, he always brought chips back home from time to time. He lied it down on the table, and not long after, my siblings came running and crying. 'Dad why did you leave!?' My little brother cried as he hugged him, my sister on the other side. I felt a sense of family, something I haven't felt in a long time. Through the open door walked a other entity, the tall man. I then snapped back into life, and became a bit sad that I wasn't seeing my dad every day, or that he wasn't showing me something. I didn't feed him, I let him eat a microwaved frozen food, I could not give a damn about his existence. Well, that's a lie, I'd prefer if he was gone.

A couple weeks went by, I was kinda getting used to ignoring the tall man in my house. One good thing is that I never saw him getting intimate with my mom. Could've been good or bad, cause I couldn't punch him, bummer. He was always at work, your typical nine to five corporate slave. So when he was gone, I'd spend time normally with my family. I video chatted my dad every day or two, and just talked about life, sometimes he'd show me how to wood work via video chat. I could live with this.

One day, he came back with a few boxes in his hands, and a letter, or at least that's what it looked like. He opened the boxes in front of my sister and brother, as well as my mom and I. Inside the link box, there was a super high quality drawling tablet, the exact one that my sister always wanted, and cracked jokes about. She took it and ran to her room to use it. In the blue box, there was this laptop, one that my little brother was talking about gettjng for ages, and wouldn't shut up about how good it was. He said thank you and ran to his room to use it. I was pissed, he was trying to buy us into liking him, and it was seeming to be quite effective. He opened a my box, it was keys to a car, specifically the car I always told my dad I was going to get when I got money, and got us out of this house, into a nice house. He always said he was gonna buy it for me, I felt conflicted.

'I know we've had our ups and downs, but I really do want to get along with you as my child, or maybe even just a friend.' I saw my mom out of the corner of my eye, she was tearing up, of happiness. I came back to my senses, and went back to my room, slammed the door shut. I knew I had let my mother down, there were like twenty different emotions circulating through me, they were wreaking havoc. I began to punch the walls, I started screaming, it was probably audible from miles away. I felt weird, something I had never felt before. It didn't seem healthy, but I didn't care. This feeling was new to me, I felt like dying over and over, but even then, that might've not been enough to suppress the pain. I remember thinking to myself, 'I'm gonna kill him, he will die!'

That night, I asked him to come talk to me outside. He looked excited. We went outside, and I took him to the back of the house. I had an itch on my lower back. 'So, what's up?' I didn't reply. 'You're uh, quite the mysterious one aren't you?' He chuckled a bit to himself, I didn't move a muscle. He began to talk about what he had for the future, how he was gonna move us out in like a month, and buy us everything we wanted. 'That's what my dad's gonna do.' I mumbled quietly. 'I beg your pardon?' He replied. I couldn't take it anymore. 'My dad's gonna buy us a house, he's gonna move us out!' I pulled out the pocket knife from the back of my pants and stabbed him in the chest.

His blood came rushing out shortly, I began to scream and cry, 'You will never be my dad!' I stabbed him time and time again, he didn't move after a while. My dad walked up behind me and patted me on the back, along with my mother, sister, and little brother. We spit on him together, and we started to chant, it was a happy chant. We danced around his corpse. I started to sweat intensely, my family began to fade away, still chanting, it turned louder and louder. They began to float away, I dropped to my knees, and the tall man was laughing at me, he pointed and laughed. I started to laugh, with tears running down my face, I took the knife and pointed it at me, that's when I heard the voice. 'Wake up! Jesus Christ you've been sleeping all morning!'

My mom woke me up, I got up and went to the table. I got a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and began to eat. My mom walked outside and began to talk to my aunt, 'So, I was able to get this puppy sold for about $150!' I overheard some of their conversation, I wanted a puppy. My dad walked in with a bag, 'Hello my dear children! I am awesome for I have brought the goodies!' I look inside the bag, and tell him that he forgot my hot chips. He quickly runs outside. I take the bag over to my sister and brother, where they get their bag of chips, and start munching away. Once I finish my cereal, I get ready for school. I brush my teeth, and put on a sweater. My mom passes by me on the phone with her sister, talking about something, I couldn't quite catch it. As I open the door, I see my dad chasing after my baby sister, who's face is covered in mud, and laughing away. 'I'm gonna brush your hair so hard!' He yells at her, I giggle to myself. My aunt is outside my house, playing jump rope with my cousin. I wonder who's winning. My sister walks past me, and looks at me. 'Another bad dream?' she asks. 'Yea, this one was hectic.'

[jinxthequeergirl]

Not the villain (pt.1)

Crowley x reader (fairytale/disneyish Au)

Summary: you are said to rule the kingdom's after your father passes away as that day approches aziraphale is sent to watch after you while his dear friend Crowley is sent to do quite the opposite but never the less plans change

Warning: none except it's looong and it might be a bit cheesy? So it may be bad for that but then again that's kinda the point since I wanted it to be disneyish

Also note that if this series goes well I plan on doing one for aziraphale if anyone wants to give suggestions but anyways here it is! ENJOY!

But here it is enjoy!

(also not my gifs)

~~~~~~~

"She's obligated to rule the kingdoms now that her father is dying, and Who knows what hell has planed for her by now."

Aziraphale followed Gabriel through heaven and listened intently to the task he was being given.

"Now we are sending you down there to be her care taker while the king is sick in bed. Make sure she is safe and that nothing happens to her basically you are her guardian angel..." Gabriel shivered after pausing "Imagine the kind of chaos that would happen with out a queen!"

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Gabriel stopped abruptly and turned to Aziraphale. "Well get down there they are expecting you!"

"Oh yes of course!" and just like that he was stood outside of the castles front gate's.

"Lady Y/n!?" you looked up from the book in your lap at one of the maides who had made an appearance in the door. "Yes?"

"Sir Aziraphale has arrived."

"Alright I'll be right down." the maid nodded and excused herself shutting the door behind her. "Alright try to get some more rest I'll sent the nurse back soon enough." you stood from your seat and leaned over the man in bed placing a kiss on his forhead.

Your father smiled up at you as you began to leave. "Darling please don't worry about me anymore Aziraphale is here to take care of you and prepare you for your role as queen soon. Focuse on that not about me the nurse can handle me." You rolled your eyes and nodded.

"I understand get some rest now." you stepped out into the hall and hurried to meet your new guardian.

You where the daughter of the king of the seven kingdom's. And the rightful air of the throne since your mother had passed when you where younger and you had no brothers or refused to take a suiter. You where next in line now that your father was seemingly ready to pass.

Meaning he believed that although you where quite old enough to handle yourself you still needed a guardian to watch and protect you.

"Aziraphale I presume?" you stepped down into the throne room where the man stood. "Ah yes! My lady it's a pleasure to meet you..your majesty." he bowed down before you.

You smiled lighty at him. "That's not nessecary Sir." He quickly stood up and straightened himself out. "Of course forgive me your highness."

"It's alright but please call me y/n....but in any even now that we've finished our formalities..." you quickly scanned the room for any of the castles workers before grabbing his arm. "Come with me!" you giddily pulled him behind you as you raced down the hall not allowing Aziraphale the chance to protest. You raced out a back door and through the courtyard. "My lady please...please slow down!"

You only stopped once you had left the court yard and came up to a small wooden building not to far from the castle. "Now that you are my guardian I can go where I please as long as you are with me."

"Well yes I'm sure that's true but-"

you pulled the wooden door of the rickedy building open and stepped inside ignoring him only to appear again with a white horse in towe. "Here you are kind sir."

He took the rains of the horse nervously. "Princess I really do not think that now is the time to go horse back ridding...perhaps we could go inside and get acquainted over a cup of tea?"

You came back out of the stable already on horse back looking down at him. "Aziraphale. You have no idea how long I've waited for a proper guardian so that I could leave the castles limits. Now of you so wish you can wait here for me to return with in the hour then we may share a spot of tea, or you may follow me and get acquainted if that is what you wish either way I am leaving."

You where already off and heading towards the large forest that sat behind the stable. "Princess!..y/n wait!" he climbed into his horse and quickly followed after you.

"Where in heavens are we even heading?"

You looked over to him and smiled. "When I was younger my mother would take me out here to a clearing...we would play all sorts of games there. After she died I wasn't allowed out here anymore."

Aziraphale gave you a sorrow filled look that you brushed aside quickly. "But why don't you tell me about yourself? Where are you from? What intrests you?"

As the two of you spoke and tracked deeper into the woods a snake followed quietly through the grass waiting for his chance to make an apperance. Or to at least see the princess he was sent to kill.

You grinned as you neared the familiar green clearing and quickly picked up the pace. You slid off your horse and pulled your shoes off to feel the grass beneth your feet.

"Isn't it just beautiful Aziraphale!?" Aziraphale stepped into the clearing holding both horses rains in his hand admiring the area. "Indeed it is."

The clearing was a large green area with wildflowers of an asortment of colors giving the place a pop of color farther down past the trees lied a river bed and a feild full of daisys across it. The place was almost magical with the way the afternoon Sun lit it up.

"I think I'll just tie the horses up over by this tree then?" he looked at you as you had already assumed a spot in the grass laying back in it facing the Sun. "Sounds fine!"

You smiled up at the sky as Aziraphale headed off to a sturdy tree just outside the clearing.

As you lied in the grass the breeze blowing it through your fingers something caused you to sit up quickly. The wind blew through the trees rustling the leaves almost like it was calling to you. You stood up grabbing your dress in your fists and made your way to the opposite edge of the clearing to where the river bed sat. The wind blew again beckoning you further and further to the edge almost like the wind it's self was pushing you.

"Funny seeing you here." Aziraphale jumped after tightening the rains on a sturdy branch and turned to see an old friend sat comfily on a fallen branch.

"Crowley!? What are you doing here?"

"I can ask you the same."

"I asked you first now I won't ask it again."

"I was sent here on a job. And you?"

"I was also sent here on a job..."

Unlike Aziraphale who obviously looked like an Angel trying to fit in. He was Dresses properly and cleanly.

Crowley dresses just like a demon would of he where trying to fit in. Dark colors and rouged yet sharp his hair was trimed and neat as well one might have mistaken him for royalty. the only diffrence where the shaded eye glasses that covered his eye's.

Crowley stood up from the branch and sauntered over to his friend. "And what job was that?"

Aziraphale nervously glanced over at the clearing before answering. "If you must know...I'm here protecting princess y/n from any stunts your side might try pulling while her father is ill."

"Really well then where IS the princess?"

"She's right overs th-" as Aziraphale turned to point you our he noticed you where in fact no longer in the spot you where once laying. "Princess? Y/n!?" Crowley gave a devilish grin before melting back to a snake and slithering his way into the clearing.

You had found yourself by the river unsure of what had beckoned you too it but you happily lifted your dress above your ankles allowing your feet to splash around in the more shallow end. Crowley had slithered down the hill towards the river.

His job was a simple one well something that should have been simple enough for him. He was tasked with killing you before you could be handed the throne.

But as his plan to do so unfolded it played out much more difficult than he anticipated.

You had hopped up on to a log that bridged the clearing and the daisy medow and made your way across it. Crowley followed suite preparing to bite you.

But before he could the log shifted causing you to lose your balance.

Crowley quickly caught your wrist and pulled you into him before jumping safetly on the other side as the other end of the log slid and fell into the river.

"Wow..." you looked up at him with a grin. "You must be my guardian Angel or something!"

Crowley froze when looking down at you. He had seen you yes but not like this. You had a wild excited look in your eyes and a wide smile that lit up your whole face. He blinked a few times taking you in.

"Quite...Quite the opposite actually..." He had loosened his hold on you allowing you to step away a bit. There was something about you that held Crowley in a sort of daze. You brushed your dress off and offered your hand to him.

"Well in any event you saved me...thank you kind sir." He quickly shook himself from the daze and took your hand and kissed your knuckles. "The pleasure is mine princess y/n?"

"Yes that is I...and you are...?"

Crowley opened his mouth to answer but someone across the stream did so for him.

"Crowley! Why thank heavens you found her!"

"Aziraphale! You know this man!?"

They both exchanged a look. "Yes he's...he's an old friend of mine...why don't we head back for that tea we spoke about earlier and perhaps check on your father?"

"How do you suppose i-"

Crowley quickly snapped and a black horse appered making it's way through the medow. "I'll have my trusty steed here give you a quick ride back to yours."

You smiled as Crowley helped lift you up on to the horse and walked it across the river.

Aziraphale shot him a look as he continued to the clearing with you. Aziraphale followed behind and quickly got the horses ready. "There you are my lady."

He lifted you off and set you gently back on the ground. "Thank you so much."

"My pleaser." You hopped onto your horse and awaited for aziraphale to acompany you.

"You go ahead miss I think I should catch up to my friend here."

"Alright but don't be long I'm sure my father would like to formally meet you."

Aziraphale nodded as you rode off and out of the woods. "Good bye princess I do hope to see you again!" Crowley yelled and waved after you.

Aziraphale then slapped his arm. "I don't known what you or your side is playing at Crowley but you stay away from her you hear me?"

He held his hands up defensivly. "Oh right what was I gonna do kill her?"

Aziraphale huffed. "I don't know what you had planed..." Aziraphale hopped onto his horse and shot Crowley another stern look before riding off.

Crowley watched in distess. Kiing a princess was one thing. Killing you would be a completely different thing.

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Tagging:

@writer-of-camelot

@ibjessjess

@eagelandbutterfly

@sophiematskiv

[domjaehyun]

[P.1] Alright so dramatic anon here x). Brace yourself because this is going to be a long ass ride I'm telling you. Also I'm not a native english speaker so if there is any mistakes or if I word things inappropriately that's why. ~~ The dream was taking place at my house. I was living with my mom, my older brother and sister and my boyfriend Yuta. So Yuta and I shared a room. My bro and my sis also shared a room together just right across mine.

[P.2] So the night comes in and I go to bed with Yuta, we do what we have to do lol. He makes love to me all night long, alternating between sweet and rough sessions. (The boy ain't vegan let me tell you dis, he loves to eat that pussy. 10 out of 10, I would recommend). Anyway he looked so damn good, just beautiful from head to TOE, you know. The next morning I woke up to his kisses and he tells me that he's going outside real quick to smoke his cigarette. [P.3] I was like "yeah yeah whatever" lol "let me sleep I'm tired." I got up and went into the kitchen. I say Hi to my mom and she goes "You know sweety, me, your brother and sister want to have a talk with you." You know the TALK, and I was like "oh hell no i'm not doing this" Because the thing is I was so louuud last night and I was bothering them. I became super defensive like pointing fingers left and right like "Yeah but when my sis had a boyfriend we could hear her" [P.4] or "Yeah but my bro asked me to leave my room so he can fuck in it while I was sleeping on the couch." I felt attacked so I ended up saying "If it's like this, I'm leaving the house." So I go to my room to pack my stuff and it was like already more than 30 mins since Yuta went smoking so I was like "where is he? What's he doing?" And from my window I saw him talking to his ex. I was like wtf man, what is this B doing here. She was caressing his arms and stuff, I was so mad lol. [P.5] So yuta came back. He tried to kiss me but I dodged him. He was kinda confused but I told him to pack his stuff that we were leaving. Fast forward we are in the car and it's silent. He puts his hand on my knee, he's caressing my inner thigh, he's really trying to comfort me like "Did you fight with your mom? You know she loves you right and I love you too. I'll make you feel better." [P.6 ] And I started crying LMAO I was crying my heart out like fuck you, stop being so kind to my face you motherF I know you're lying to me x). At one point I parked the car on the side of the road and I told him "I saw you with your ex being real cozy this morning? Are you serious Yuta? Are you cheating on me? We've been together for how many years hun. How can you do this to me?" Omg if only you had seen the pain in his eyes, man that hurt me but I was like "focus focus focus." [P.7] He opened his mouth to say something but in the end he stayed silent. And I hate it you know when people don't wanna talk about things and they just try to touch you to calm you down. So he was trying to caress my arms like "Please baby don't cry." And I was like "Just answer me. Are you cheating on me? Do you still love her?" He didn't want to answer so to me it was like a yes you know, like you’re not outright saying it but you are not denying anything either. [P.8] I got out the car and started walking away and he was running behind me like "Please baby come back into the car, so side of the road is not safe, please." Didn't wanna hear it lol. So he was like "We'll talk about it but please not here, it's too dangerous, I'm not leaving without you." We went back to the car, we drove for a bit and I parked the car again just in front of his ex's house and I went "Talk, I'm listening." [P.9] and Yuta was like "I feel like no matter what I would say to you, you wouldn't trust it because in your head you've already painted me guilty." To be honest I was so sad, I just wanted to hug and kiss him, like I needed his warmth so bad but since my trust was in peril I just couldn't let my guard down. And I was like "Is that a Yes or a no?" and he went "baby..." with a sad face. I cut him off like "Is it a Yes or a no?". He stayed silent again so I was like "Get out of my car." [P.127] he went out of my car holding his bags and I was like "I can't do this Yuta, I don't trust you anymore. Why is it so hard for you to give me clarity?" And I just left him, just like that. ~~ The END. Let me tell you when I woke up I was in paiiin lol. I felt like crying, I was like it's too early for this sh.t. Don't know if he did cheat on me or not though. I've been waiting for weeks to dream about a reconciliation between us but it's not happening lol I guess this is how it ends.

--

That is dramatic omg i can’t deal i was like tense reading this djgfkkkgdk that’s so sad :( i’m so sad aw im sorry that was a rough dream BUT the sex sounded hot heheh (your line abt being vegan made me snort)

[bitchwithpatton]

Found a sanders sides story

warnings: sympathetic Patton, tw death kinda, bees.

Patton knew it was too late. no one could find Roman and Remus now. How where they so good at hide and seek?? If  he did’t win well, he knew what would happen. So, he removed him self from his hiding spot, and went into the kitchen. 

Bee Movie Script - Dialogue Transcript   According to all known laws of aviation,   there is no way a bee should be able to fly.   Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.   The bee, of course, flies anyway   because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.   Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.   Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.   Barry! Breakfast is ready!   Ooming!   Hang on a second.   Hello?   - Barry? - Adam?   - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.   Looking sharp.   Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.   Sorry. I'm excited.   Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.   A perfect report card, all B's.   Very proud.   Ma! I got a thing going here.   - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!   - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!   Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!   - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry.   - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation.   Never thought I'd make it.   Three days grade school, three days high school.   Those were awkward.   Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive.   You did come back different.   - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.   - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah.   - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going.   Everybody knows, sting someone, you die.   Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead.   I guess he could have just gotten out of the way.   I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day.   That's why we don't need vacations.   Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances.   - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are!   - Bee-men. - Amen!   Hallelujah!   Students, faculty, distinguished bees,   please welcome Dean Buzzwell.   Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of...   ...9:15.   That concludes our ceremonies.   And begins your career at Honex Industries!   Will we pick ourjob today?   I heard it's just orientation.   Heads up! Here we go.   Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times.   - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary.   Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco   and a part of the Hexagon Group.   This is it!   Wow.   Wow.   We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life   to get to the point where you can work for your whole life.   Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.   Our top-secret formula   is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured   into this soothing sweet syrup   with its distinctive golden glow you know as...   Honey!   - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!   - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins.   - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive   to improve every aspect of bee existence.   These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology.   - What do you think he makes? - Not enough.   Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman.   - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey   that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions.   Oan anyone work on the Krelman?   Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know   that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot.   But choose carefully   because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life.   The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that.   What's the difference?   You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off   in 27 million years.   So you'll just work us to death?   We'll sure try.   Wow! That blew my mind!   "What's the difference?" How can you say that?   One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make.   I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life.   But, Adam, how could they never have told us that?   Why would you question anything? We're bees.   We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth.   You ever think maybe things work a little too well here?   Like what? Give me one example.   I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about.   Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach.   Wait a second. Oheck it out.   - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow.   I've never seen them this close.   They know what it's like outside the hive.   Yeah, but some don't come back.   - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks!   You guys did great!   You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!   - I wonder where they were. - I don't know.   Their day's not planned.   Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what.   You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that.   Right.   Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime.   It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it.   Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it.   Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too?   Distant. Distant.   Look at these two.   - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them.   It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock.   Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom!   He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me!   - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out.   What were you doing during this?   Trying to alert the authorities.   I can autograph that.   A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades?   Yeah. Gusty.   We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow.   - Six miles, huh? - Barry!   A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it.   - Maybe I am. - You are not!   We're going 0900 at J-Gate.   What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough?   I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means.   Hey, Honex!   Dad, you surprised me.   You decide what you're interested in?   - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one.   Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day?   Son, let me tell you about stirring.   You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around.   You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing.   You know, Dad, the more I think about it,   maybe the honey field just isn't right for me.   You were thinking of what, making balloon animals?   That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger.   Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey!   - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny.   You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer!   - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me!   Wait till you see the sticks I have.   I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!   Let's open some honey and celebrate!   Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae.   Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!   I'm so proud.   - We're starting work today! - Today's the day.   Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone.   Yeah, right.   Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal...   - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left!   One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side.   - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar!   Wow!   Oouple of newbies?   Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!   Make your choice.   - You want to go first? - No, you go.   Oh, my. What's available?   Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think.   - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on.   I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.   Wax monkey's always open.   The Krelman opened up again.   What happened?   A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one.   Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.   Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!   Oh, this is so hard!   Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,   humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,   mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry?   Barry!   All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine...   What happened to you? Where are you?   - I'm going out. - Out? Out where?   - Out there. - Oh, no!   I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life.   You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?   Another call coming in.   If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd   that gets their roses today.   Hey, guys.   - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?   Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.   It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.   Really? Feeling lucky, are you?   Sign here, here. Just initial that.   - Thank you. - OK.   You got a rain advisory today,   and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain.   So be careful. As always, watch your brooms,   hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats.   Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us.   Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada!   - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies,   bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans!   All right, launch positions!   Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!   Black and yellow!   Hello!   You ready for this, hot shot?   Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.   Wind, check.   - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check.   - Wings, check. - Stinger, check.   Scared out of my shorts, check.   OK, ladies,   let's move it out!   Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers!   All of you, drain those flowers!   Wow! I'm out!   I can't believe I'm out!   So blue.   I feel so fast and free!   Box kite!   Wow!   Flowers!   This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual.   Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.   Roses!   30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.   Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick.   That is one nectar collector!   - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir.   I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there,   a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic.   That's amazing. Why do we do that?   That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.   Oool.   I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?   Oopy that visual.   Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move.   Say again? You're reporting a moving flower?   Affirmative.   That was on the line!   This is the coolest. What is it?   I don't know, but I'm loving this color.   It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it.   Yeah, fuzzy.   Ohemical-y.   Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.   My sweet lord of bees!   Oandy-brain, get off there!   Problem!   - Guys! - This could be bad.   Affirmative.   Very close.   Gonna hurt.   Mama's little boy.   You are way out of position, rookie!   Ooming in at you like a missile!   Help me!   I don't think these are flowers.   - Should we tell him? - I think he knows.   What is this?!   Match point!   You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it!   Yowser!   Gross.   There's a bee in the car!   - Do something! - I'm driving!   - Hi, bee. - He's back here!   He's going to sting me!   Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze!   He blinked!   Spray him, Granny!   What are you doing?!   Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable.   I gotta get home.   Oan't fly in rain.   Oan't fly in rain.   Oan't fly in rain.   Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!   Ken, could you close the window please?   Ken, could you close the window please?   Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure.   You see? Folds out.   Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.   What was that?   Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This...   Drapes!   That is diabolical.   It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.   What's number one? Star Wars?   Nah, I don't go for that...   ...kind of stuff.   No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds.   When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.   There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.   I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it.   I predicted global warming.   I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me.   Wait! Stop! Bee!   Stand back. These are winter boots.   Wait!   Don't kill him!   You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me!   Why does his life have less value than yours?   Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement?   I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling.   My brochure!   There you go, little guy.   I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing.   Put that on your resume brochure.   My whole face could puff up.   Make it one of your special skills.   Knocking someone out is also a special skill.   Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.   - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.   - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye.   - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye.   I gotta say something.   She saved my life. I gotta say something.   All right, here it goes.   Nah.   What would I say?   I could really get in trouble.   It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human.   I can't believe I'm doing this.   I've got to.   Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!   No. Yes. No.   Do it. I can't.   How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good.   Here she comes! Speak, you fool!   Hi!   I'm sorry.   - You're talking. - Yes, I know.   You're talking!   I'm so sorry.   No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming.   But I don't recall going to bed.   Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting.   This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!   I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this,   but they were all trying to kill me.   And if it wasn't for you...   I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised.   That was a little weird.   - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah.   I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me!   I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now.   - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What?   The talking thing.   Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.   - That's very funny. - Yeah.   Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with.   Anyway...   Oan I...   ...get you something? - Like what?   I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee?   I don't want to put you out.   It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.   - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose.   - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup.   Hey, you want rum cake?   - I shouldn't. - Have some.   - No, I can't. - Oome on!   I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.   - Where? - These stripes don't help.   You look great!   I don't know if you know anything about fashion.   Are you all right?   No.   He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison.   He finally gets there.   He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on.   And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan.   Why would I marry a watermelon?"   Is that a bee joke?   That's the kind of stuff we do.   Yeah, different.   So, what are you gonna do, Barry?   About work? I don't know.   I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want.   I know how you feel.   - You do? - Sure.   My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.   - Really? - My only interest is flowers.   Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan.   Anyway, if you look...   There's my hive right there. See it?   You're in Sheep Meadow!   Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!   No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once.   - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not?   - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that.   - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine.   Just having two cups of coffee!   Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee.   Yeah, it's no trouble.   Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life.   Are you...?   Oan I take a piece of this with me?   Sure! Here, have a crumb.   - Thanks! - Yeah.   All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around.   Or not.   OK, Barry.   And thank you so much again... for before.   Oh, that? That was nothing.   Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...   This can't possibly work.   He's all set to go. We may as well try it.   OK, Dave, pull the chute.   - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing!   It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life.   Humans! I can't believe you were with humans!   Giant, scary humans! What were they like?   Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.   They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy.   - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't.   - How'd you get back? - Poodle.   You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see.   You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal.   - Well... - Well?   Well, I met someone.   You did? Was she Bee-ish?   - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp.   - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders.   I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all.   I can't get by that face.   So who is she?   She's... human.   No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law.   - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy.   She's so nice. And she's a florist!   Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!   We're not dating.   You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes   with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite!   She saved my life! And she understands me.   This is over!   Eat this.   This is not over! What was that?   - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey!   And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat!   - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No.   It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up...   Sit down!   ...really hot! - Listen to me!   We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them!   Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning?   There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me!   You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee!   - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee.   Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!   There he is. He's in the pool.   You know what your problem is, Barry?   I gotta start thinking bee?   How much longer will this go on?   It's been three days! Why aren't you working?   I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about.   What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee!   Would it kill you to make a little honey?   Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you.   Martin, would you talk to him?   Barry, I'm talking to you!   You coming?   Got everything?   All set!   Go ahead. I'll catch up.   Don't be too long.   Watch this!   Vanessa!   - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him.   He doesn't respond to yelling!   - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen!   I'm not listening to this.   Sorry, I've gotta go.   - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend.   A girl? Is this why you can't decide?   Bye.   I just hope she's Bee-ish.   They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena?   To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!   Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering.   A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events?   No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere?   It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster.   Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn.   TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane!   You don't have that?   We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease.   Oh, my.   Dumb bees!   You must want to sting all those jerks.   We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us.   So you have to watch your temper.   Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk,   write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion:   Anger, jealousy, lust.   Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?   Yeah.   - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug.   He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep!   What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?   Yeah, it was. How did you know?   It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.   You've really got that down to a science.   - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet.   What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this?   How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,   Ray Liotta Private Select?   - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him.   - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it.   You don't have enough food of your own?   - Well, yes. - How do you get it?   - Bees make it. - I know who makes it!   And it's hard to make it!   There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing!   - It's organic. - It's our-ganic!   It's just honey, Barry.   Just what?!   Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing!   You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have!   And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this.   I'm getting to the bottom of all of this!   Hey, Hector.   - You almost done? - Almost.   He is here. I sense it.   Well, I guess I'll go home now   and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around.   You're busted, box boy!   I knew I heard something. So you can talk!   I can talk. And now you'll start talking!   Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier?   I don't understand. I thought we were friends.   The last thing we want to do is upset bees!   You're too late! It's ours now!   You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword!   You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio!   Where is the honey coming from?   Tell me where!   Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!   Orazy person!   What horrible thing has happened here?   These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now   they're on the road to nowhere!   Just keep still.   What? You're not dead?   Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed?   To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here.   I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off!   I'm going to Tacoma.   - And you? - He really is dead.   All right.   Uh-oh!   - What is that?! - Oh, no!   - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade?   Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!   Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?!   How much do you people need to see?!   Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window!   From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell.   But don't kill no more bugs!   - Bee! - Moose blood guy!!   - You hear something? - Like what?   Like tiny screaming.   Turn off the radio.   Whassup, bee boy?   Hey, Blood.   Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see.   Wow!   I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it.   I mean, that honey's ours.   - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in.   It's a close community.   Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own.   - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble.   Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack!   At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls.   Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly.   Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.   You got to be kidding me!   Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee!   - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood!   I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw?   We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit.   What is this place?   A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead.   They are pinheads!   Pinhead.   - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.   The Thomas 3000!   Smoker?   Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar.   A couple breaths of this knocks them right out.   They make the honey, and we make the money.   "They make the honey, and we make the money"?   Oh, my!   What's going on? Are you OK?   Yeah. It doesn't last too long.   Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls?   Our queen was moved here. We had no choice.   This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes!   That's a drag queen!   What is this?   Oh, no!   There's hundreds of them!   Bee honey.   Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale!   This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something.   Oh, Barry, stop.   Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor.   Do these look like rumors?   That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos.   How did you get mixed up in this?   He's been talking to humans.   - What? - Talking to humans?!   He has a human girlfriend. And they make out!   Make out? Barry!   We do not.   - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on?   The bees!   I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night.   Barry, this is what you want to do with your life?   I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees!   Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked   your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop.   I remember that.   What right do they have to our honey?   We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!   Even if it's true, what can one bee do?   Sting them where it really hurts.   In the face! The eye!   - That would hurt. - No.   Up the nose? That's a killer.   There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters.   Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source.   No more bee beards!   With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.   Weather with Storm Stinger.   Sports with Buzz Larvi.   And Jeanette Ohung.   - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung.   A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,   intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey,   packaging it and profiting from it illegally!   Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,   we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book,   Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon.   Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.   Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"?   Bees have never been afraid to change the world.   What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?   Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.   We were thinking of stickball or candy stores.   How old are you?   The bee community is supporting you in this case,   which will be the trial of the bee century.   You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too.   It's a common name. Next week...   He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots...   Next week...   Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em.   Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live.   Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish.   In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness!   It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.   Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that?   Quiet, please. Actual work going on here.   - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is!   I'm helping him sue the human race.   - Hello. - Hello, bee.   This is Ken.   Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.   Why does he talk again?   Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working.   But it's our yogurt night!   Bye-bye.   Why is yogurt night so difficult?!   You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours!   Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help.   - Frosting... - How many sugars?   Just one. I try not to use the competition.   So why are you helping me?   Bees have good qualities.   And it takes my mind off the shop.   Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now.   Those are great, if you're three.   And artificial flowers.   - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too.   Bent stingers, pointless pollination.   Bees must hate those fake things!   Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done.   Maybe this could make up for it a little bit.   - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess.   You sure you want to go through with it?   Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able   to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty!   It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan,   where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history,   we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak.   What have we gotten into here, Barry?   It's pretty big, isn't it?   I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day.   You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers?   Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade.   - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill.   Well, if it isn't the bee team.   You boys work on this?   All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding.   All right. Oase number 4475,   Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry   is now in session.   Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively?   A privilege.   Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world?   I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed.   Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please.   Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,   my grandmother was a simple woman.   Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right   to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us.   If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines,   just think of what would it mean.   I would have to negotiate with the silkworm   for the elastic in my britches!   Talking bee!   How do we know this isn't some sort of   holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry?   They could be using laser beams!   Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know,   he could be on steroids!   Mr. Benson?   Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here.   I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me.   It's important to all bees. We invented it!   We make it. And we protect it with our lives.   Unfortunately, there are some people in this room   who think they can take it from us   'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over,   you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have   but everything we are!   I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice!   Oall your first witness.   So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have.   I suppose so.   I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron!   Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms.   Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term.   I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you?   - No. - I couldn't hear you.   - No. - No.   Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that,   it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey.   They're very lovable creatures.   Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.   You mean like this?   Bears kill bees!   How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?!   Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows!   OK, that's enough. Take him away.   So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me.   - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police.   But you've never been a police officer, have you?   No, I haven't.   No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example   of bee culture casually stolen by a human   for nothing more than a prance-about stage name.   Oh, please.   Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?   Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting.   Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!   That's not his real name?! You idiots!   Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on   your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005.   Thank you. Thank you.   I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome   with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow.   I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?   Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you?   Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't   have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir?   Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now!   This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella!   Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?!   - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it!   Order! Order, I say!   - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down!   I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that.   I think the jury's on our side.   Are we doing everything right, legally?   I'm a florist.   Right. Well, here's to a great team.   To a great team!   Well, hello.   - Ken! - Hello.   I didn't think you were coming.   No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery.   I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.   Oh, that was lucky.   There's a little left. I could heat it up.   Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.   So I hear you're quite a tennis player.   I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby.   That's where I usually sit. Right... there.   Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,   and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill.   You think I don't see what you're doing?   I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common.   Do we?   Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out.   That's just what I was thinking about doing.   Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.   I'm going to drain the old stinger.   Yeah, you do that.   Look at that.   You know, I've just about had it   with your little mind games.   - What's that? - Italian Vogue.   Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.   A lot of ads.   Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine?   Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!   I think something stinks in here!   I love the smell of flowers.   How do you like the smell of flames?!   Not as much.   Water bug! Not taking sides!   Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic!   I've got issues!   Well, well, well, a royal flush!   - You're bluffing. - Am I?   Surf's up, dude!   Poo water!   That bowl is gnarly.   Except for those dirty yellow rings!   Kenneth! What are you doing?!   You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it!   We need to talk!   He's just a little bee!   And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time!   Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life?   No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them!   Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...   My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster!   Goodbye, Ken.   And for your information,   I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man!   I'm sorry about all that.   I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it!   I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me.   I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well.   Are you OK for the trial?   I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas.   We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.   Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers...   Yeah.   Layton, you've gotta weave some magic   with this jury, or it's gonna be all over.   Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around   is to remind them of what they don't like about bees.   - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic?   Only to losing, son. Only to losing.   Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know.   What exactly is your relationship   to that woman?   We're friends.   - Good friends? - Yes.   How good? Do you live together?   Wait a minute...   Are you her little...   ...bedbug?   I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand,   doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children?   - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents!   - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are!   Hold me back!   You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson?   He's denouncing bees!   Don't y'all date your cousins?   - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy!   Adam, don't! It's what he wants!   Oh, I'm hit!!   Oh, lordy, I am hit!   Order! Order!   The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins!   I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction!   You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages!   Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way!   - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs.   What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison   from my heaving buttocks?   I will have order in this court. Order!   Order, please!   The case of the honeybees versus the human race   took a pointed turn against the bees   yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery.   - Hey, buddy. - Hey.   - Is there much pain? - Yeah.   I...   I blew the whole case, didn't I?   It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died.   I'd be better off dead. Look at me.   They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.   Look, there's a little celery still on it.   What was it like to sting someone?   I can't explain it. It was all...   All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy!   All right.   You think it was all a trap?   Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this.   What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world.   What will the humans do to us if they win?   I don't know.   I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad.   Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!   Oh, my.   Oould you get a nurse to close that window?   - Why? - The smoke.   Bees don't smoke.   Right. Bees don't smoke.   Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking.   That's it! That's our case!   It is? It's not over?   Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.   Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can.   And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.   Mr. Flayman.   Yes? Yes, Your Honor!   Where is the rest of your team?   Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.   Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,   and as a result, we don't make very good time.   I actually heard a funny story about...   Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs   taken up enough of this court's valuable time?   How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on?   They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges   against my clients, who run legitimate businesses.   I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case!   Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going   to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion.   But you can't! We have a terrific case.   Where is your proof? Where is the evidence?   Show me the smoking gun!   Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun?   Here is your smoking gun.   What is that?   It's a bee smoker!   What, this? This harmless little contraption?   This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee.   Look at what has happened   to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?"   Is this what nature intended for us?   To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines   and man-made wooden slat work camps?   Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man?   - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card.   Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees!   Free the bees! Free the bees!   Free the bees!   Free the bees! Free the bees!   The court finds in favor of the bees!   Vanessa, we won!   I knew you could do it! High-five!   Sorry.   I'm OK! You know what this means?   All the honey will finally belong to the bees.   Now we won't have to work so hard all the time.   This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson.   You'll regret this.   Barry, how much honey is out there?   All right. One at a time.   Barry, who are you wearing?   My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.   - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean?   We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years.   Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement?   First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps.   Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with,   every last drop.   We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more   than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine.   We're all aware of what they do in the woods.   Wait for my signal.   Take him out.   He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine.   And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames...   But it's just a prance-about stage name!   ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products   and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments.   Oan't breathe.   Bring it in, boys!   Hold it right there! Good.   Tap it.   Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming!   - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down.   Shut down honey production!   Stop making honey!   Turn your key, sir!   What do we do now?   Oannonball!   We're shutting honey production!   Mission abort.   Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base.   Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there.   Oh, yeah?   What's going on? Where is everybody?   - Are they out celebrating? - They're home.   They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in.   I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket.   At least we got our honey back.   Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't?   It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it.   This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well.   And now...   Now I can't.   I don't understand why they're not happy.   I thought their lives would be better!   They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people.   You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?   - What did you want to show me? - This.   What happened here?   That is not the half of it.   Oh, no. Oh, my.   They're all wilting.   Doesn't look very good, does it?   No.   And whose fault do you think that is?   You know, I'm gonna guess bees.   Bees?   Specifically, me.   I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things.   It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.   That's our whole SAT test right there.   Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom.   And then, of course...   The human species?   So if there's no more pollination,   it could all just go south here, couldn't it?   I know this is also partly my fault.   How about a suicide pact?   How do we do it?   - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice.   Right, right.   Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going.   I had to open my mouth and talk.   Vanessa?   Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going?   To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena.   They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying.   It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it.   Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this.   I know. Me neither.   Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports.   Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?   Roses!   Vanessa!   Roses?!   Barry?   - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are.   Flowers, bees, pollen!   I know. That's why this is the last parade.   Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down?   Oould you slow down?   Barry!   OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault.   Yes, it kind of is.   I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you   with the flower shop. I've made it worse.   Actually, it's completely closed down.   I thought maybe you were remodeling.   But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined.   I don't want to hear it!   All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen.   I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park.   All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got.   - Bees. - Park.   - Pollen! - Flowers.   - Repollination! - Across the nation!   Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia.   They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy.   Security will be tight.   I have an idea.   Vanessa Bloome, FTD.   Official floral business. It's real.   Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.   Thank you. It was a gift.   Once inside, we just pick the right float.   How about The Princess and the Pea?   I could be the princess, and you could be the pea!   Yes, I got it.   - Where should I sit? - What are you?   - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea?   It goes under the mattresses.   - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal.   You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco!   Let's see what this baby'll do.   Hey, what are you doing?!   Then all we do is blend in with traffic...   ...without arousing suspicion.   Once at the airport, there's no stopping us.   Stop! Security.   - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes.   Has it been in your possession the entire time?   Would you remove your shoes?   - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me.   I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight.   Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job.   Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job!   I think this is gonna work.   It's got to work.   Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott.   We have a bit of bad weather in New York.   It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay.   Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it.   I gotta get up there and talk to them.   Be careful.   Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine?   I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.   Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.   - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing.   Bee!   Don't freak out! My entire species...   What are you doing?   - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney?   Don't move.   Oh, Barry.   Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain.   Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit?   And please hurry!   What happened here?   There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded.   One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious!   - Is that another bee joke? - No!   No one's flying the plane!   This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status?   This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York.   Where's the pilot?   He's unconscious, and so is the copilot.   Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience?   As a matter of fact, there is.   - Who's that? - Barry Benson.   From the honey trial?! Oh, great.   Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee.   It's got giant wings, huge engines.   I can't fly a plane.   - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes.   How hard could it be?   Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning.   This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport,   where a suspenseful scene is developing.   Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory...   That's Barry!   ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers   and an incapacitated flight crew.   Flowers?!   We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls   with absolutely no flight experience.   Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane.   I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres.   They've done enough damage.   But isn't he your only hope?   Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all.   Their wings are too small...   Haven't we heard this a million times?   "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."   - Get this on the air! - Got it.   - Stand by. - We're going live.   The way we work may be a mystery to you.   Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs.   But let me tell you about a small job.   If you do it well, it makes a big difference.   More than we realized. To us, to everyone.   That's why I want to get bees back to working together.   That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O.   We get behind a fellow.   - Black and yellow! - Hello!   Left, right, down, hover.   - Hover? - Forget hover.   This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep!   Barry, what happened?!   Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time.   - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not!   So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.   All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out!   Move out!   Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane!   Don't have to yell.   I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble.   It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice!   It's not a tone. I'm panicking!   I can't do this!   Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it!   You snap out of it.   You snap out of it.   - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!   - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!   - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!   - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn.   How is the plane flying?   I don't know.   Hello?   Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there?   The Pollen Jocks!   They do get behind a fellow.   - Black and yellow. - Hello.   All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop.   Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?   No, nothing. It's all cloudy.   Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.   - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee.   Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!   Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something.   - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.   Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.   Bring the nose down.   Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!   - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that!   Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!   - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK.   Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys?   Affirmative!   Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.   Land on that flower!   Ready? Full reverse!   Spin it around!   - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one?   - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower!   That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower   made of millions of bees!   Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.   Rotate around it.   - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly.   Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern?   Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse!   Just drop it. Be a part of it.   Aim for the center!   Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!   Oome on, already.   Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!   - Yes. No high-five! - Right.   Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower?   What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius!   - Thank you. - But we're not done yet.   Listen, everyone!   This runway is covered with the last pollen   from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth.   That means this is our last chance.   We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this.   If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?   Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains?   We're bees!   Keychain!   Then follow me! Except Keychain.   Hold on, Barry. Here.   You've earned this.   Yeah!   I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.   Oh, yeah.   That's our Barry.   Mom! The bees are back!   If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time.   I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight!   Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next?   Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.   Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel!   Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat!   I had no idea.   Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment?   Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you.   Sorry I'm late.   He's a lawyer too?   I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase.   Have a great afternoon!   Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere.   No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me.   You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next?   All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly.   Thank you, Barry!   That bee is living my life!   Let it go, Kenny.   - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go.   - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is.   Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office.   You have got to start thinking bee, my friend.   - Thinking bee! - Me?   Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it.   I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here?   I'm not making a major life decision during a production number!   All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys.   I had virtually no rehearsal for that.