#and we know Geralt talks
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Prompt 38
Jaskier has kept a secret for years. The ring with dandelions carved into it that he wears every second of every day is the only thing keeping him from turning into ash. He sleeps with a lovely woman one night, desperately trying to move on from Geralt (it doesn't work, he is still very much in love with his best friend) only to awake in the morning and find- FUCK She stole his ring! That conniving little-! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! What does he do!? He races to the mirror and it confirms his worst fear. The glamour the ring gives him is gone. He can't see his reflection. He reaches a hand up to his mouth and feels his fangs. No- Nonono! Then his worst fucking nightmare ON TOP of his worst nightmare happens. He hears the stomping footsteps of a witcher approaching their room. Godsdamn it all. He hears the doorknob jiggle and.. Alright, he'll be the first to admit it, he panics. "DON'T COME IN, GERALT" The doorknob jiggling pauses. "Jaskier? Are you alright?" "Y- YES! Perfectly peachy! Don't come in!" Jaskier rushes around the room, pacing in panicked circles like a caged beast. He was a caged beast. He reaches to close the curtains of the only window in the room and like an idiot, he fumbles in place and ends up with his hand in the direct sunlight. He shrieks in pain and holds his hand to his chest. Geralt, scenting agony and hearing Jaskier yell, barges in without another moment of thought. Only to see Jaskier scrambling away from him in fear. In all his years of knowing Jaskier, he has NEVER been afraid of him. It physically pains Geralt to see it now. He doesn't understand why he wasn't allowed in. There's no lover of Jaskier's hiding in a corner embarrassed at being caught, Jaskier isn't indecent or anything, so why-? Then he looks at Jaskier, truly looks at him, and sees his blue eyes are glowing, and his mouth - Parted open as he pants - reveals fangs. Geralt's eyes dart to Jaskier's neck and it's confirmed. The worst part of it all, is the way Jaskier's eyes keep glancing between the door out of the room, and Geralt's silver sword. Geralt is infuriated. Not only did the woman Jaskier take to bed last night turn Jaskier into a vampire, but she also made Jaskier fear Geralt because of it. When Geralt says he isn't going to harm (let alone KILL like Jaskier had feared) Jaskier for the twentieth time, Jaskier finally believes him, and begs him to help him track the woman down. Geralt is intent on killing the vampire that ruined poor young human Jaskier's life. Jaskier is intent on getting his human-glamour, sunlight-immunity-enchantment ring back from this human he slept with, so he can go back to pretending he's human, like he has been doing for the past hundred or so years.
#i know this isnt how witcher vampires work#but its how astarion works and thats what really counts#geraskier#fanfiction prompts#geralt x jaskier#witcher fanfiction#geralt x dandelion#the witcher#geralt loves his bard!#writing prompts#requited unrequited love#friends to lovers#monster of the week#villain of the week#vampire#vampire au#Vampire Jaskier#nonhuman jaskier#inhuman jaskier#They clear it up and Geralt accepts him and they kiss#NO UNHAPPY ENDINGS#NO SAD ENDINGS#WRITE A BAD ENDING TO THIS AND ITS ON S I G H T#GERALT LOVES HIS BARD WE DO NOT TALK ABOUT THE NETFLIX ADAPTATION#even though i know him better as jaskier rather than dandelion :sobbing:#my penance...
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[MASTERPOST]
Eskel is like "I WILL read this book about... A wolf and all his friends? Dancing and being. happy... 🥺"
#the witcher netflix#geraskier lovechild#eskel#soft eskel#geraskier#(no jeskel I am sorry but honestly I can see it at times)#omegaverse#listen retrospectively Eskel will slap his face (repeatedly) because it is at times pretty obvious (but only if you know!!)#did Milek accidentally call Eskel 'daddy' a few times? ofc he did. (how should Eskel know that he didn't just mixed it up in excitement.)#'oh he clearly meant his omega father' WELL#Roach should have been an indicator! but it's either that that name is in one of jaskiers songs (probable) and jaskier is like#'oh yeah he likes that one bard song about the horse - I swear he loves horses'#(that isn't even a lie and it's very Jaskier to compose an ode for Roach)#or he just goes 'We heard stories about a witcher crossing our town-'#and now wolf themed kids book. it's-#oh well#a lot of things are obvious when you look back to them#and I think Eskel could have made the connection! if Jaskier still had a lute. he would have gone at least once '... geralts omega bard??'#(who Geralt didn't really talk about but who they always could still smell traces of on him - bad thing that scents change after pregnancy)#but no lute?? connection not made.#that's the one jaskier thing Eskel knows of. always has a lute.#and retrospectively he can see that Milek and Geralt really look alike - it's at this age more obvious than later - because that is the age#that Eskel remembers. In which he still has a mental picture of what Geralt looked like? but it's been SO LONG#over a century#and Eskel was a traumatized child too. Things are. Very muddy.#the only ones who have a chance to recognize Milek are Visenna and Vesemir and that's it.
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anyhow ...hi @alllthequeenshorses
I am currently busy trying to figure out if for this lil spontaneous au idea I do wanna go all into the new quest but make it Kiyan and detective roadtrip or such
or if I myself wanna lean more towards Kiyans more canon place simply because that’d leave me with a body to bring him back to instead of just murder (think of it as a combined “who did it” with amnesia and also a possible happy ending beyond justice via revenge killing-I have many notes discussing this with myself and I do tend toward the latter because it can still allow for a somber “get revenge and die peacefully” end but with trauma literally buried leading towards more mystery stuff and idk if any of the things I wrote even made sense)
here is miniscule context
#how tf do you draw ghosts? idk it might change like 20times over any art i can think of for this random idea#it already did SLIGHTLY for the next peace so ooops#i also dont know how to tag this so uh#possession au#is what i'll go with for now#hoping that if i ever do something more w/ kiyan but demon i tag THAT differently#anyhow all things start somewhere#praise be pissed roach#i did remember-later on#that geralt mentioned she doesnt like spirits when vlodimir talks about his passion for...mares and maidens#or whatever the fuck he said i dont remember its been a while#so we have 2 optiions#1: i forgot and didnt change it beyond her usual pissy self#2: kiyan does actually count as a demon in this and i answered my own/geralts question and changed the non established au(but like me side-#tracked) lore already#the witcher#kiyan#geralt#anyhow next one up in a sec bc i already did 2 bc i have no self control#thought process behind this was: if kiyan were to be possessed by a demon and THEN possessed someone....what even would you call it#possession² apparently-yes thanks i am hilarious#i just realized the way i shaded geralts pants makes it look like he has the saggiest ass ever and i can not stop looking and laughing at it#sry to all you GERALT HAS CAKE fans bc...this is not that by pure accident#art#zkretchy
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Ooh! How about held for the wip guessing game? <33
Thank you for the ask, Emma! This is from my AU where Renfri lives. It's probably not what you were going for with this word but it's what I've got 😂
She feels around her surroundings, trying to get a sense of what she is dealing with. The coffin is small. The lid only moves a little when she pushes at it; it is not locked, but it is held closed by the soil atop it.
Send me a word and I'll tell you if it appears in my WIPs!
#yeah renfri doesn't have a great time upon finding that she's not dead#i needed a reason for geralt not to know she's alive#...i should probably cw tag this shouldn't i?#buried alive#cw buried alive#there we go#anyway! thank you for the ask!#i'm having a lot of fun with this fic#witcherbeech#asks#wren talks
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1x02 Diefenbaker’s Day Off // 2x08 One Good Man // 2x13 White Men Can’t Jump to Conclusions // 3x01 Burning Down the House | Normalized
due South does a main character re-casting better than any other show on TV, and they do it by playing with television's own accepted meta-narrative.
Recasting a character has a long tradition in television, creating a viewership that knows and understands the storytelling short form at play. As viewers, we realize that sometimes actors aren't available to reprise a role (or simply aren't interested in it anymore); but, for the sake of the story, sometimes the show needs that character to come back. So we lean hard into suspended disbelief and just go with it. After all, the characters in the show accept the parareality of it—why shouldn't we?
Of course, the most famous example of a character recast would be the Dick/Darren disaster on 1960s sitcom Bewitched, when Dick York was unceremoniously replaced by Dick Sargent in the role of Darrin Stephens. ("The Dick Wars" would have gone absolutely insane).
it was... not successful
But they weren't the only ones to do it. Aunt Viv from Fresh Prince, Becky from Roseanne, Daario Naharis from Game of Thrones, Greg Serrano from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (pain, agony)—recasting characters but maintaining the fiction is a storied tradition in TV. New actor, same character; totally normalized.
And shows continue to do it, even today, with a—uh—similar dedication to fucking it up doing it poorly.
why must we be punished like this
due South even engages in this trope itself in season 2, when hard-hitting investigative journalist Mackenzie King is recast and they don't even try to find an actress who looks similar. In 1x02 Diefenbaker's Day Off, she's played by brunette Madolyn Smith-Osborne; in 2x08 One Good Man, she's been replaced by blonde Maria Bello, and nobody talks about it.
yeah i'm absolutely the same person, obviously
Everyone diegetically (within the world of the show) is just like, oh yeah, that's hard-hitting investigative journalist Mackenzie King. Totally. Only non-diegetically (outside of the world of the show) does the viewer go "No, that's not the same person." Internally, the fiction proceeds as usual.
So what would happen if, say, Samantha Stephens turned to Dick Sargent and said "You're not Darrin," when everyone else in the show continued to treat him as though he was? Or if Jaskier told Geralt that he knows he's not actually Geralt, and everyone treated him like he was delusional?
Or if Fraser, even, had recognized Mackenzie King as someone entirely different, and everyone treated him like he had a hole in his bag of marbles because of it? Of course that's Mackenzie King; even her boss knows it. No, she's never been a brunette. What are you talking about?
And that's exactly what happens in Burning Down the House.
the rays vecchio
Diagetically, everyone else treats Callum Keith Rennie's character as though he is Ray Vecchio. "Oh, good, you found him," says Det. Huey. Elaine, Franchesca, literally everyone else both at the station and outside of it treat Callum Keith Rennie Ray Vecchio as though he is David Marciano Ray Vecchio. They're acting exactly as any other TV character would in the face of a recasting: as though absolutely nothing had happened.
Except for Fraser.
Fraser's specific brand of parareal Canadian plot magic means that he's immune to the recasting blindness; he's acting as an agent of the viewer, voicing our non-diegetic concerns. Fraser is (as he so often is) a character with one foot outside of the narrative. He's just always been like this and he doesn't know why.
oh this man is infuriating and hot, fuck. shit.
And for a character who already thinks he is likely insane (he sees the ghost of his dead father! He communicates with his deaf half-wolf! He is instantly committed to a mental institution upon voicing the actual true story of his life!), this is very extremely distressing. Fraser thinks he's actually lost it this time, because everyone else in due South is acting like a TV character, and Benton Fraser is acting like a viewer.
This is so brilliant on so many levels. They just fully lampshade the damn thing. It allows our protagonist to speak for disgruntled or confused viewers. It engages at a postmodern level with television as a medium with a storied history (and due South is incredibly postmodern; nearly every episode is or contains a reference to another piece of media). It's written from the perspective of someone who loves and is knowledgeable about TV tropes.
And it gives us an entirely new Ray while still maintaining respect and loyalty to the original, something no other straight (lol) recast could ever do.
Genuinely one of the most clever, witty, well-crafted hours of television ever made. I could write essays about so many different parts of it. And I guess I will!!!!!!
It’s Burning Down the House week in our dS Stacked Rewatch!
#due south#benton fraser#ray kowalski#ray vecchio#Mackenzie king#my gif edit#sammaggs gif edit#maggs due south meta#3x01 burning down the house
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Steve H.
Part One, Part Two
I think it would be incredibly funny to write a No-Upsidedown Au where Steve and Dustin still become unofficial brothers. Like, the kids are still getting into a ton of dangerous mischief and one way or another Dustin adopts Steve as his older brother figure and in short order Claudia takes him in as a second son.
Like maybe Steve gets his first concussion actually helping Dustin find his missing cat after Steve has been in his mentorship/brother role for a few months. How I don't know, I like to imagine it playing out like the book version of Dandelion and Geralt's meeting in The Witcher where Dustin is being chased by some bullies and just latches on to the first strong man he sees to hide behind and then BAM, bonded for life.
Anyway, Steve has been around for a little while and Claudia has met him a few times (she's not just going to let a strange older boy she's never met hang around her middle school-aged son without meeting him first) but they don't know each other too well and Steve seems very...plastic for lack of a better word when she's around. Like he doesn't want to upset her so he's always got a perfect smile and polite words ready to offer her, but he's a nice kid and way more goofy and authentic when he's hanging out with Dustin and she peeks her head into the living room.
So when he gets hurt while helping, and subsequently protecting Dustin and a couple of his friends she makes sure to stop by with cookies and a profound thank you. She asks where his parents are and who's going to make sure he wakes up every hour for the next 24 hours when he gets discharged and he says he was planning to call a cab and set some alarms because his parents aren't in town and there's no one else at the house. So Claudia pretty much just tells him he's coming home with them for the rest of the week, which turns into a full week when his parents still aren't home, and by the time he's actually ready to leave they've all grown accustomed to this new family unit.
Steve does go home at first, but he makes a lot more excuses to come over and Claudia and Dustin work overtime coming up with lame excuses as to why he should just spend the night.
"Oh Steve, it's already midnight and you're taking Dusty to school tomorrow morning anyway, why don't you just take the spare bed."
"Steve! Steve! We have to watch the next one! You said we could watch the whole series so we're not stopping until we pass out on this couch!"
"Oh, honey the snow is really coming down out there. I know you have snow tires but you really shouldn't risk it. You stay here tonight."
And Steve doesn't want to leave, not at all. He's never felt more at home than he does sitting with the Hendersons after dinner watching sitcoms or playing board games, but sometimes he doesn't have a good excuse or his parents are planning to come home for a couple of weeks so he leaves and hates every moment spent in his own house.
Until one day when he's staying the night at his parent's house while they're home for a long weekend and they have an absolute blowout of a fight. He doesn't even know why it started, just knows that everyone was already in a foul mood and none of them are the type to back down from a fight and the result is hours of screaming hurtful things at each other and his mom throwing a few slaps his way that hurt his soul more than his face and ends with his dad going upstairs and smashing his walkman and his favorite cassettes with the kitchen kettle. At which point silence descends on the Harrington house and Steve turns around and walks out the door.
It's a 20 minute walk to the Henderson home and by the time he gets there, he's numb in the heart and the hands. Dustin is already in bed and Claudia pulls him inside to warm him up and talk it out, at which point Steve curls up into her arms and cries and rages.
After that night Steve doesn't go home aside from the single trip he made to fill a bag, grab his car, and tell his parents he won't be coming back. They put up a bit of a fight but ultimately let him go with the promise that no legal action will be taken, meaning that they'll sign whatever documents he needs for school or the doctor or whatever if he faxes them to the office but he won't try for emancipation and bring all that legal drama to the forefront. Steve knows that any lawyer he could get for the case would be trounced by whoever his parents brought in, so he agrees.
And from that day on he lives with the Hendersons and becomes Claudia's second son and continues being Dustin's older brother.
(We didn't actually get to the funny part but I was on a role so if you're interested I'll be posting part two soon!)
#stranger things#dreamer speaks#steve harrington#dustin henderson#claudia henderson#cw domestic violence#pre steddie#pre Wayne x Claudia#maybe you see where this is going
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I feel like people don't appreciate enough that Dandelion is a fast slippery little fucker. Granted we don't see this much since the books are heavily Geralt POV, but it's mentioned that a lot of his dalliances involve him scaling up houses, jumping out of windows, sliding down drainpipes, running along rooftops etc and that is hard as fuck to do
He's basically committing AssCreed level parkour and is able to outrun almost anyone who comes after him. When he's not travelling with Geralt, he has to be able to get out of trouble by himself somehow and since he's not a fighter that means being good at running, hiding and talking
Not only this but in Last Wish, as someone pointed out on my posts once, it's shown that when riding his horse, he can effortlessly lift one leg to hook over the pommel of his saddle while playing his lute at the same time the horse is moving. That's a lot of skill and balance and knowing your own horse's temperment and what they're willing to put up with. He's not just a casual rider he's an experienced rider pulling off shit that you'd only see from pros
Idk man it's just a little irritating how often he's reduced to "horny silly bard" when he has these skills under his belt too and is obviously capable of keeping up with hunting parties and actual warriors without much issue ya know?
#the witcher books#dandelion#meta post#if you think he has 'average athleticism' I'm sorry but you're wrong#because the average everyday person would not be able to do all that shit#he might be anywhere near on par with what a witcher can do but he does far exceed a lot of normal folks
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Prompt 126
In place of August Fourteenth, Promptapalooza 7/ Geralt knows he has a soulmate when he first hears a small voice ask him what his name is. He doesn't respond. He's not humoring destiny (that bitch) or fate (that cunt). He's not going to respond.
It's been a few years and occasionally the voice still speaks to him.
"Are you real?" "Do you hate maths too?" "I fell earlier and really hurt my knee. Today's been bad. what about your day?" "I had a nightmare last night, but thinking of you helped." "When we're grown ups one day and we get married, we'll have flowers at the wedding, right?" "Do you like music?"
And Geralt never answers. He won't link this innocent child to his wretched, wretched life. He won't link them to a murderer.
Another few years go by, and unfortunately the voice won't shut up.
"Still not talkin', huh? That's fine! I can fill the silence easy enough! Let me tell you alllll about my day!"
He's temped to use their connection to tell his soulmate to stop talking, but he doesn't want to expose himself.
…
And he doesn't want to hurt them.
But them telling him a long rambling story about their walk in the woods that day and how a squirrel scared them right in the middle of Geralt fighting a leshy wasn't exactly helpful.
A few more years pass, and the voice still speaks to him. It's gotten deeper, so Geralt suspects it's a boy. Almost a man, but not quite.
"Father yelled at me again. If you care. I hope whoever you are, you have a better home." "Are you dead? They didn't give me a dead soulmate, right?" "Why won't you talk to me?" "i don't think anybody likes me. Not even you. You never speak to me. I wish you did." "I'm thinking of leaving. If there was any time to speak up and tell me who you are or where you reside, it'd be now." "Please talk to me." "I dreamt of you again last night. I keep doing it, recently. Sometimes you're a woman. Sometimes you're a man. Sometimes I can't really tell. Sometimes you're sweet and shy, sometimes you're flirty and crass. Sometimes you have brown eyes. Sometimes they're green. Sometimes they're blue. I wish I knew."
They're yellow. Hideous and grotesque. Inhuman. The boy shouldn't wish to know them.
"I left. I finally did it. I left just last night. I swear, wherever you are, I'll find you."
Another few years pass, and the voice is still there, but it's much rarer to hear. Geralt feels relief knowing he's finally giving up on Geralt and will find himself a better life.
"I haven't been doing a good job of finding you. But you haven't really given me any hints. Do you not want me to find you? Do you really want me to stay away?"
And Geralt finally responds to the man, for the first time ever.
"Yes."
"IT'S YOU! You responded! You're real! You're actually real! I do have a soulmate! I knew it! I knew I wasn't unlovable! Where are you? I'll-"
And Geralt hears the exact moment his rambling thoughts come to an abrupt crashing halt, as he processes what Geralt agreed to.
"Oh."
And that's the last message he gets from his soulmate's voice. It's what Geralt wanted all along. But after a solid year of hearing nothing from him, Geralt will admit he misses him. He misses the chatter.
It's the beginning of the very next year that he meets the bard Jaskier, who stubbornly fights tooth and nail to incorporate himself into Geralt's life.
He fills the silence left by Geralt's soulmate. It's nice to have prattle back. He doesn't tell Jaskier that, of course. Jaskier is young and foolhardy and jumps from bed to bed, but soon enough, he'll want to settle down with his own soulmate and he'll leave Geralt. Geralt isn't looking forward to the silence returning, but he likes Jaskier. He'd go through any silence for him.
It's Jaskier's fifth year traveling with Geralt. They sit across from each other around a campfire as Geralt roasts some pheasants and and Jaskier stares despondently at the notebook he's not writing in.
And then Geralt hears him. His soulmate's voice in his thoughts again.
"I've fallen in love."
And Geralt is happy for his soulmate. Because - Geralt glances at Jaskier for a moment and smiles to himself - He has too.
"I don't know if you hate me. Or if you're dead. Or if you've found someone else, but whatever it is, I hope you can be happy for me. I love him. I really, truly do. I love Geralt with everything in me."
And Geralt jolts and whips his head to look over at the bard.
"Jaskier?" He sends through the connection, and watches as his bard's eyes grow wide with shock.
"…You love me?"
#geraskier#geralt x jaskier#the witcher#geralt x dandelion#geralt loves his bard!#witcher fanfiction#fanfiction prompts#writing prompts#requited unrequited love#friends to lovers#soulmate au#soulmates#telepathy#insecure jaskier#for good reason#geralt is traumatized and immortal and he panicked and kinda fucked up jaskiers mental state#but they fix it and make up#and jaskier ofc is also immortal somehow so they can live together forever#angst with a happy ending
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hi, first off i really love your art. the h/c and warmth really hit me where i live and your illustration style is fantastic. lately i've been obsessed with the post where an unwell milek thinks geralt will leave him behind. was that an ingrained insecurity, assuming his super-witcher dad wouldn't have time for a sickly human kid?
[MASTERPOST] - Ahh, thank you for the ask! Yes, this scene.. I actually saw this a bit differently! It's not about Milek fearing Geralt will leave him behind, he actually wants him to. They need to find his Pa!! I think he often feels like a burden; Jaskier knows this, but Geralt isn't aware of this yet. Milek just wants to pull his weight, especially with Jaskier. A little sneak peak to their struggles regarding this:
Meanwhile Jaskier continues to struggle with his omega status.
#jaskier#the witcher#geraskier lovechild#julian alfred pankratz#omegaverse#there are various things happening here! a. Milek never really had to fear that Jaskier would leave him he knows he never ever would#b. Jaskier said again and again that he'll always care for him and loves him and that he doesn't have to pull any weight at all#c. Jaskier actually became the parent that just wants his kid to be educated and study and learn#(maybe because he knows Milek won't be able to do hard labour but also because he knows what Milek really wants to do)#(filed under: things I haven't drawn yet but they had their big fallout because of oxenfurt and university - things to come in the future)#d. Milek has watched Jaskier working his ass off in various jobs that he didn't like#(and he thinks that prostitution is the worst but only because they didn't properly talk about it before)#e. Jaskier is struggling with how he is percieved - which I think was never that much on his mind when he was travelling with Geralt#being a carefree bard and giving everyone the middlefinger who had some wrong ideas about what he could do and what not#but this is definitely an AU in which he doesn't have a good relationship with his father and he can still hear him say he'll become#'an unbonded omega with a bastard child working on the streets' and I think sometimes it gets to him#(because Jaskier is king of hating his parents ever being right about him)#that Jaskier kind of wants to spare Milek and quietly hopes we won't become an omega - even if he feels bad about it - shall become plot#(one dayyyy)#anyway that was a very long rant about Mileks complex relationship with him feeling like a burden
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One thing about Halsin
I am currently thinking way too much about Halsin, because... Again, I love this dude. He just is one of the most wholesome of your companions and... I did not know I needed a hunky, hairy elf, but apparently I needed a hunky, hairy elf.
But writing a bit more about him, I also have to say, that I also love him for the whumpy and angsty stories you can write for him. Given all we know, there is quite a lot of whumpy material in his past. Be it with him and the drows, or be it just the fact that he has already lost so much in his life.
(Also, yes, I am still going with: He is a werebear. Might write something about that later.)
Something I cannot help but think about, though, is... Well, look, I am not better than y'all. I am sexualizing the hell out of this man. Because... I mean... Just look at him! I am a simple man, and I just really would like to climb this mountain, you know?
But I cannot help but also think about how - if the character was real - he would feel about it. Because I can see that within the universe... Well, he is exotic. There are not a lot of hunky, hairy elves around. And while within elven society he would probably be seen as ugly (because usually elven societies do like androgynous looks - and DnD is not really different in that regard), he would also probably be seen as exotic enough that quite a few people would go: "But it's a kink!"
Especially given the fact that folks at the Sword Coast are generally quite liberal when it comes to sleeping around, I can kinda see a lot of folks just wanting to climb that mountain once, if you get my drift.
So I can see him both getting flirted with a lot - and sexually harassed as well. And given how he talks about his Underdark experience for the most part (as if it was not traumatizing at all), I think he would try to brush it off. But that does not mean, it is not hurting him, right?
Especially as he is yearning for a closer connection. Or has been for a long while before the curse at least. He wants a partner (or more).
And it might be I am projecting a bit much of book!Geralt onto him there, who is very much in a similar position (because he is a Witcher folks wanna bang him, but he wants a relationship and family, which nobody wants to have with a witcher).
And man, folks. Thinking about this just makes me want to hug this big bear of a man.
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tags via @essskel
WAIT ur so right!! i literally do this shit to my younger bro too! you 🤝 me 🤝 geralt of rivia: being overprotective big brothers 😭
sometimes when i'm running around novigrad if i'm near the bits i'll pop into the nowhere inn and just stare at lambert doing his gay little dice shake. i've already exhausted his dialogue options and so i don't say anything to him, i just check up on him bc i have brainrot and i like to reaffirm his existence. i imagine in universe those must be the STRANGEST fucking encounters lambert has with geralt. the famed geralt of rivia just runs in, makes intense and marked eye contact with his brother, regarding him for a moment, and then turns around and sprints out the door without saying a fucking word.
#also like half the time i leave my little brother alone i find him like idk. burning down the house or smthn#so part of it is for his sake part is for my own bc u KNOW ur taking at least part of the blame if ur younger sib raises hell on your watch#oh. also what if geralt started checking in on lambert more after aiden :^( he doesn't talk to him bc a grieving lambert is a force to be#reckoned with and he explicitly asks to be left alone the one time we see him grieving but geralt still wants to make sure he's ok...#dang this gives me plot bunnies galore
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Endiness made a beautiful long post with all his quotes on that topic that I think is very informative and worth looking at, so here’s a link to that. And with that already discussed, I thought I’d make a thread of all his changes that we are aware of, because when you look into them, you find that none of his “book accurate” changes are actually book accurate.
His decision to make Geralt grunt and cut his lines.
HC: "All the grunts, I either added or I didn't say anything and just grunted instead. It was often up to the other actors to go, 'I think he's not gonna say anything now.'"
JB: "Henry likes to cut his lines, 'cause he's lazy. No, he literally just likes to cut them. He likes to do more up here [frames his face with his hands] and just with face and hmms and grunts. There's a lot of hmms, and so I often have to take a lot of his lines and turn it into a lot of my stuff so that the plot happens."
So, as everyone who has read the books knows that Geralt is and always has been a yapper. Gerakt often talks or thinks in monologues, and definitely not in short grunts.
Of course when the audience started making fun of Geralt for not being able to speak in full sentences Henry promptly went back on admitting the blame and instead said that the big bad writers were the ones who didn't give him lines, and now it was his life’s mission to fight for a book accurate Geralt who speaks.
Roach’s death scene
After S2 came out, Lauren received a lot of backlash for Roach’s death scene, with multiple sources citing that she wanted the moment to be more “comedic” before the brave Henry Cavill stepped in and refused to participate in such horrible anti source material activities.
LH: "Henry was so unhappy with the line. Finally I said, 'You know what, you come up with something. I trust you, you know this material so well, you know the book so well, you don't even have to pitch it to me.' And he came back the next day with a beautiful speech that's at the end of 'Sword of Destiny' when Geralt is facing death.”
This is the line he ended up using:
“Enjoy your last walk across the meadow and through the mist. Be not afraid of her for she is your friend."
This was Lauren’s response AND the original line.
LH: “Here's what was scripted, in homage of the fact that a previous Roach had existed, and another one will exist soon. It's hardly a joke. Henry wanted a longer, more emotional moment, which I was more than happy to give him. Don't create drama where none exists.”
So in S2 Geralt ends up quoting a part of his monologue from ‘Sword of Destiny’ when he’s at his lowest after thinking that Yennefer had died at the battle of Sodden Hill, and he has nothing left to live for. Which to me doesn't work that well with Roach at all. That line was a response to Geralt thinking he's lost the love of his life, not his horse. In my opinion, the original line Lauren penned out is more heartfelt and actually more emotional and more book accurate as well.
The absolute removal of any Triss and Geralt “romance”
This one we don’t have that much information on in comparison to others. But there were multiple reports that at the beginning of S2 Triss and Geralt were supposed to have some kind of a romantic scene with each other which then was cut during production, and it was largely speculated that it was due to Henry Cavill.
“Several months ago we reported on a sex scene happening between Geralt and Triss, sometime in the first half of Season 2. That didn’t happen, as we all saw, but here’s what we know about the original plan for that: Geralt and Triss are in a room together, they seem friendly at first. They are playing some kind of weird game. Whoever wins a round, gets to ask a question. We’re not privy to the exact flow of the conversation, but it eventually leads to both of them ending up in bed. We can only guess why this was cut, but perhaps it was thanks to Henry Cavill.”
Now, irrelevantly on your feelings on book Triss and Geralt you have to admit that that short-lived “romance” is indeed a part of the books and therefor book accurate. So the removal of it would go against Mr I’m fighting to make this show as much book accurate as possible.
The removal of the Yen and Geralt sex scene in S2
"We just wanted to be very careful that it was true and real, and it didn't turn into something that we, as actors, didn't believe it should be," Cavill stated. When Yennefer and Geralt unite, they embrace, but it doesn't go further than that. He continued: "We wanted it to be emotional rather than sexual. It was really, really important, and we had to lean away from what was originally on the page." Initially, Geralt and Yennefer were written to have a more passionate night. Henry Cavill and Anya Chalotra went to "The Witcher" producers and explained why they thought a steamy evening was not the way to go. "These are people who believe one thing about the fate of another and then find out something else is true," Cavill said about Geralt believing Yennefer was dead. "That's not how they behave," the actor added. "How they behave is they just want to be with the person and emotionally recognize their existence again in that shared space.”
This one is a bit tricky because I am willing to get behind an actor who doesn't want to do a sex scene out of comfort reasons or whatnot, but Henry saying that "That's not how [Yennefer and Geralt] behave”, is quite absurd in my opinion. Because that is very much how Geralt and Yennefer behave, especially in the short stories and ToC. They are inherently a very sexual couple who come crashing in and out of each other’s lives while having very passionate sex. But I can understand wanting this scene to be more “emotional” (as if sex isn't emotional), so this one I am willing to give him a bit more leeway on. (But then again looking at the blinds saying that he refused any sex scenes because oh his “ideals” and was allegedly really nasty to Anya about it, well..)
Geralt being the perfect father figure to Ciri with no flaws and no struggles (which inevitably snowballed into the Yen Betrayal Arc)
This one I don’t see talked that much at all, and to me this one is his most detrimental one.
@LHissrich: “In interviews, Henry explains how he felt strongly that Geralt NOT be bumbling, nor a struggling father figure. In fact, a lot of S2 is about how Geralt does come from a loving (albeit unconventional) family. Henry was passionate about this shift, and we discussed it a lot, and ultimately thought it was wonderful for his character development. But it also had the domino effect of changing what Ciri needed from Yen when she entered the picture. Thus, introducing the idea of balance.”
So I don’t know about you, but I love when characters have flaws and naturally progress be it for good or bad, some would say that that's what story telling is about, well that someone wouldn't be Henry Cavil. Geralt being a struggling father figure at first, someone who makes mistakes and learns from them and tries is very much a prominent theme in Blood of Elves and is actually very real, people make mistakes! Especially in huge shifts such as “becoming a father overnight’ but we didn't get that because Henry refused to play it that way. What we got is Geralt who already basically knows exactly how to parent, he always knows what to say, what pep talk to give and also doesn't hold any resentment and any negative feelings towards Vesemir at all. It's all one dimensional happy family here! Which goes against not only the books but what he preached about fighting tooth and nail to make the “forgotten” male characters three-dimensional as well because the horrible feminist Lauren only thinks about female characters.
Lauren then goes on saying that “it also had the domino effect of changing what Ciri needed from Yen when she entered the picture. Thus, introducing the idea of balance” So, it is fair to speculate that Henry’s refusal to showcase Geralt having any flaws at all and act book accurate snowballed into The Controversial Yennefer Betrayal Arc.
These are the ones that I can remember off the top off my head, so there might be more, there’s probably more that we aren’t even aware of. I think putting them all together showcase a very interesting picture. One of Henry Cavill never actually understanding who Geralt fundamentally is as a character, and of him not being a team player at all. I just hope that more and more people are aware of the insane PR his team did for him when it came to this show, and that more people are able to see through it.
#anti henry cavill#the witcher#long post#i do believe that i have an interesting vintage point because ive been in this fandom since the show premiered so some people might not be#even aware of these things when ive lived them and have an archive of them in my head lmaoo#i don't like the formatting of asks when you reblog them so im making this a separate text post
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Witchers talk to one another. About hunts, politics, whatever. It’s just good to talk to someone with the same fucked up past as you.
The news that spreads fast in the witcher community is information about potential allies.
Thus, Jaskier is well known in the witcher community. He often hosts more than one witcher over the winter.
Geralt did not know this until he missed the window to return to Kaer Morhen one year.
It was rare for Geralt to feel embarrassed. Yet here he was, standing in front of Jaskier's door in Oxenfurt, a wave of discomfort washing over him as he knocked.
There was some movement behind the door, and soon it swung open. "Geralt! You're here!" Jaskier greeted him with a bright smile.
"Yeah, I missed my chance to get back to Kaer Morhen this winter," Geralt mumbled, his words coming out in a rush. "You once said I could stay with you if I ever needed a place during the winter."
"Of course you can," Jaskier beamed, grabbing Geralt's arm and pulling him inside. "We were just about to have dinner. I’ll get you a plate."
"We?" Geralt asked, curiosity stirring. He assumed Jaskier's guest was likely another bard.
But to his surprise, the other guest was another witcher.
"Do you know Aiden?" Jaskier asked, looking to Geralt.
#the witcher netflix#the witcher#joey batey#geralt of rivia#jaskier the witcher#henry cavill#the witcher jaskier#geralt x jaskier#geraskier#fic ideas#jaskier#gerskier#cirilla fiona elen riannon#freya allan#headcanon#yennefer of vengerberg#the witcher season 3#the witcher season three#anya chalotra#aiden and jaskier are besties#the witcher aiden#ask me whatever#asks#asks open#send asks#send me asks#anon ask#answered asks#ask box#ask me anything
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Clark kent (Cavill) and his boyfriend/husband- dealers choice. Sitting down to watch the witcher and as soon as Geralt starts talking we pause and look at clark.
“Babe? Go ‘hmmm’ for me”
"Hmmmm." M/n blinked at his boyfriend. "So...um..." He put his hands together and took a breath before pointing at Clark. "Do you have a secret acting career I don't know about or do you have a secret twin brother?"
Clark looked even more confused. "What are you talking about?"
"Do you...do you seriously not see it?" M/n almost made a noise when he saw how confused Clark still was. "I'm just...you look EXACTLY like Henry Cavill. Are you sure that's not you!?" "Honey. I promise. I'm not a secret actor. Okay?" He pulled M/n into him. "Okay." For a while, they sat there in an embrace. Suddenly M/n pulled out his phone. "I'm ordering a Geralt costume. I NEED to see you in this. I swear I'm not going crazy."
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Okay so
In the last ep of S2, we see Jaskier asleep in a room at Kaer Morhen. There are three interesting details about this scene.
The room actually looks somewhat lived-in compared to the empty, spiderweb-ridden rooms Ciri explores in an earlier episode. Jaskier hasn't been at Kaer Morhen long enough to have a lived-in guest room.
When Yennefer gets him out of bed, we see him grab his coat, which is lying next to a mostly-empty bottle of booze. He also asks Yen if she's making a hangover cure, because he feels like shit. He wasn't drunk when Geralt asked him to take Ciri home, so we know that his first night at Kaer Morhen, he got white girl wasted.
He's mostly dressed in bed. Like, he's still got his boots on, even. The only thing he seems to have taken off is his coat. But he's not shivering or curled up like he's very cold. He seems quite comfy.
This makes me think five things.
Jask met Geralt's family for the first time and promptly got blitzed with them. That's why he's the only one in the keep with a hangover - they can't get drunk on his booze.
What do Jaskier and the Witchers have in common to talk about? Well, Geralt, of course. Not only do Vesemir and the boys get a detailed rundown of every amusing anecdote Jask has from his 20+ years travelling with Geralt (along with a heaped helping of Poetic Drunken Yearning - gods, where did Geralt get this walking bag of feelings?), but Jask also gets treated to Every Embarrassing Thing Baby!Geralt Ever Did.
The room looks lived-in because it's Geralt's. Everyone was too busy drinking and spilling tea to think about making up a guest room for the bard. So when Jaskier finally passes the fuck out, and Vesemir tells Lambert to find him a bed to sleep it off in, Lambert goes "Eh, close enough" and sticks him in Geralt's. Geralt's twink. Geralt's problem.
This is also why Jaskier is still almost totally dressed, boots and all. Lambert is so not going there: he's a Witcher, not a nanny or a nurse. He drops Jask on the bed, flings a blanket over him and calls it a day.
At some point post-S2, Geralt is going to wake up in a cold sweat at like 3am and realise that leaving his bard unattended with his family was a Terrible Idea and they definitely swapped stories and he's not going to hear the end of it from anyone for a really long time
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Great Shift stories, Henry and Joey
Paparazzi:"Gentlemen, smile. Look to the right. Yeah. Good"
Henry and Joey were at the front of the hall, where the press conference was about to be held, before the release of the new Witcher season. They were all instructed to suit up and arrive. Henry felt like he was betraying Joey. They were about to announce soon, that he was leaving the Witcher TV series and passing the role to Liam Hemsworth. Henry didn't want to continue playing Geralt if the story wouldn't be more faithful to the books. Unfortunately, Joey already signed his contract and therefore had to play Jaskier for another year without Henry.
They stood next to each other. Joey couldn't pretend that he was happy. He was angry, because Henry didn't tell him soon enough how he felt and that he was leaving, trapping Joey in a job he started to hate. He felt betrayed
Back then nobody knew what happened in the following moments. Maybe it was an accident. Maybe it was intentional. But all they knew was that suddenly all around them was pure chaos. The whole city confused and screaming. Most of the planet swapped bodies with someone standing close to them. Some were very unlucky, in some cases the swap was lethal or caused many people to die. But some people got really lucky. Just like Joey and Henry here
They were obviously both shocked when they found themselves in each other's bodies. But they were interrupted by the people around them screaming and shouting at each other.
Joey in Henry's body:"Henry? Is that you? I'm you!"
Henry in Joey's body:"Is this real? Is it really happening?"
Joey:"I think it is. And I don't think we're the only ones. Maybe we should go somewhere more quiet."
Joey starts walking away, but as soon as Henry moves his body a sharp pain shoots from the back of his body.
Henry:"Ah fuck. Wait. There's something wrong. It feels like..."
Joey started smiling, realising.
Henry didn't find the pain that bad anymore and was slowly figuring out, what it was.
Henry:"Joey? Is that what I think it is?"
Joey:"I don't know what you're talking about"
Henry started laughing at his old face
Henry:"Hahahaha. No you didn't. Holy shit you're naughty, Joey. You really went to a press con with a dildo up your ass? Wow. I never thought that you'd be able to do this."
Joey:"Maybe we should go?"
Henry:"Oh fuck, we are. I really need to take a proper look at that thing stuck inside of me now "
Joey went first and couldn't stop smiling, as he heard Henry struggling to walk properly
But Henry was getting more and more into it. He never had a dildo up his ass. And this one was BIG.
They got into an empty hotel room nearby.
Joey went to the bathroom first to piss and left Henry outside. Henry started throwing his clothes off to the ground. But stopped, once he felt the thing in him move. He got on his knees and felt his own ass trying to push it in and out. An overwhelming feeling caused him to moan out loud and hold ok tightly to the bed sheets.
He heard the bathroom door open
Joey:"You wanna use the bathroom?"
Henry got up and without saying a word went to the bathroom while grabbing his old body's cheeks playfully on the way.
He wanted to look at himself in the mirror, but he needed the dildo to move. He needed to find a better position. But another unwanted movement caused him to collapse into the bath still in his clothes.
He just sat there leaning on the edges of the bath, moving his ass up and down in the air. Causing the dildo to move up and down. He was now covered in sweat. His body was begging to be fucked
Joey:"You need some help with that?" He pointed at his ass
Henry needed to be fucked. And there was a thing much better than the dildo in his ass
He leaned to the front and grabbed his old semi-hard bulge looking seductively into his old eyes
Henry:"Whip it out big boy. You got a hole to patch. And I need it"
Joey:"Are you sure you..."
Henry:"Fuck me right now!!!"
Joey threw off his pants and boxers. Leaving himself in Henry's Grey shirt only
Henry:"I want you to show me how you can be better than that dildo"
Joey:"I'm not really sure about this"
Henry:"Please just fuck me already. I can't take this anymore"
Joey helped Henry to take off his clothes. He turned him around to let him hold the edge of the bath. He then grabbed the base off the dildo and started moving it up and down rythmically. Henry was moaning in pleasure. No, he was screaming
As soon as Joey got hard, he pulled out the dildo and showed his new huge dick into his old ass. Henry couldn't even tell the difference. But now it was warmer, pulsating. And Joey was pounding him.
They were now one. Combined. Sweaty. Joey was deep inside of Henry moving his intestines.
Henry:"Ah ah ah ah. Fuck me... I need you"
Joey couldn't hold it anymore, he pulled out his new dick and shoot the load at his old back.
He was breathing rapidly from the fast tempo. Henry was still holding on. But Joey moved his head to the side and noticed his old dick leaking cum
Joey smiled. Yeah, fuck the betrayal. He's gonna be punishing him for that very often from now own.
Anonymous inbox request:
What about the great shift strikes. And everyone is swapped with the closest person at the moment. A story where henry cavill gets swapped with joey batey before some press con. And henry finds that joey's body has a dildo up his ass and he's so turned up that he begs joey to fuck him.
#Great shift#greatshift#body swap story#body switch#body swap#body swapping#male body swap#male body switch#henry cavill#joey batey#witcher fanfiction#celebrity body swap
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