#and walking him like a dog
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aesthetic-basicspam · 2 months ago
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harvey holding interviews for his new sub under the disguise of “summer associate interviews.”
“lets buy you some new clothes”
“you’re no longer speaking to that man”
he’s not even slick.
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notrobinsomethingworse · 4 months ago
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Dick, deadpan: You hid a racoon in your room.
Jason, crouched by a sleeping racoon currently sleeping on a pillow. Theres scratches all over his arms and legs. He doesn’t seem bothered: yeah? What ya gonna do about it?
Dick: Un-hide? The goddamn racoon in your room?
Jason: But I’ve named him.
Dick: Well, un-name him.
Jason: He’s Barty.
Dick: I don’t care.
Jason: …
Jason: We can use him to fuck with Bruce.
Dick: …
Dick: Would Barty like some food?
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Yeah, I don't know about you, Fidds, but I'd fold at this 🙏
Previous!!
Next!!
First!!
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doomed2repeat · 11 months ago
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I need people to hear me out:
Colin Bridgerton is NOT this type of male lead:
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He is this type of male lead:
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And I love that.
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a55goblin · 5 months ago
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domwife kim and his pathetic husband
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bowielit · 5 months ago
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one of my favorite johnpaul moments that i think about very often is that time when paul mccartney like idiot doofus the third told tv reporters that he's taken LSD and obviously got backlash and was explaining himself to a journalist and john jumped in like Yeah well the Tv Reporters shouldn't have fucking Reported on it it's not Paul's fault He got asked a Question what do you want him to do Lie? You want us to fucking Lie? This is all the fault of Big Media. Fuck you. and paul is sitting beside him like Yeah... :)
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magicpiano · 1 month ago
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I sort of like the idea of Bruce accidentally adopting Damian. Something happened which caused Damian to run away from the league and towards his father, but all he knows is that is father is batman. Before he can ever find him though, he is taken in by Bruce Wayne.
Damian intended to just slip away the first chance he gets, but somehow his escape plans keep getting interrupted. Eventually he begins to like living with the Waynes so much he starts to consider simply not looking for batman. After all, his father never came for him before. And what proof does he have that batman is so great anyways? He might as well stay with the people who actually like having him around.
Damian assigns himself as the Wayne family's protector because these weak foolish people could certainly never defend themselves. After the third foiled kidnapping attempt Damian is sure he could never leave. They would all die without him. Frankly he is amazed the Wayne's behavior hasn't gotten them all killed yet.
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marfian · 9 months ago
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Them: ONly LAnniStERs haVE BeeF wiTh ChILDren.
Daemon with Oscar:
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val3rian · 3 months ago
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he had no right to wear that slutty ass tank top
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m1ckeyb3rry · 1 year ago
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zantetsu needs to ditch those fake ass glasses and that crunchy hair gel bruh ik he’s trying to look smart and dignified but he is so FINE without them
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HE LOOKS LIKE A SHOUJO MALE LEAD PLEASEEEE
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rattlung · 6 months ago
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again idk if this has been said before but i love the lucanis approval when you're going after zara and illario meets you half way. lucanis is trying to get him to fuck off but illario ignores him and addresses rook, flirts w them, tells them that they should let him give them a tour. and when they also tell him to fuck off cause their honey said so, lucanis likes it. he follows up with "this isn't your job, there's no one you can charm into dropping their guard". and idk it kind of reminds me of the comment lucanis makes during the coffee date cutscene where he says smth along the lines of "even before i was captured, most things were determined for me" and adding that w the implication of illario absolutely hating when attention isn't on him paired with his resentment toward lucanis for being their grandmother's favorite AND lucanis telling emmerich that he "doesn't have illario's gift for flirting" like idk i imagine illario poaching any person he sensed lucanis had even a passing interest in just cause he's a spiteful mf
so here "there's no one you can charm" = "this one is mine, they won't fall for it"
i just think the mutual possessiveness is neat :)
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2demondogs · 6 months ago
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Annoying Javier/Reader Headcanons
A/N: The promised list from this post. Gender-neutral reader. Everyone can be tormented! Also atp I am so far behind Kinktober and so burnt out and busy I will just have to finish it late </3
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There's no question of if Javier's attachment to you is secure based on how irritating he is. And if he's feeling insecure, he will go about playfully proclaiming you love me! followed by a suspicious ...right?
Javier definitely steals your food. If you're really hungry, he won't. He'll think about doing it but he isn't heartless, so he won't. If it's a snack, it's going to be his for the sole reason that it will piss you off. He's leaned over and taken bites out of food while you were holding it in your bare hands. He's like a seagull, or perhaps a rude horse.
He also enjoys making sure you won't want it back. Javier will eat just about anything given the fact pickings are usually slim, and he doesn't like to waste food or animal remains. It began as genuine suggestions and meal prepping, but now he also makes suggestions simply to gross you out. Goat eyes? Yes, please!
Walks with him are either romantic or Hellish. If he can be, he's attached at your hip. This is fine when he's trying to woo you, because that tone strikes up a sort of truce. When it's a short walk to get away or just for travel, Javier is knocking your hip with his to throw you off balance or swinging your hands higher and higher until you say something.
If you bend over, he will be there. Instantly. Consider it his sixth sense. It's either a squeeze on the hips, a smack on the ass, or Javier outright rutting on you until you shove him away or start laughing. If you tell him to stop, he will. Until then, it's a safer bet to squat down instead.
Javier will just... move you around. He will grab your hand, leg, shoulder — whatever he can get to — and reposition it. Usually, it's so that you two are closer than before or are touching in some way. If you're already cuddling, then he's just dicking around. The only times he's looked genuinely sorry for it is when you've complained that you were almost asleep and then he yanked on your arm just because.
If you misspeak in front of him, you might have to shoot him. Javier will mock you for hours. Stuttering? He will laugh and ask if he makes you nervous, or tell you how it cute it is. Forgetting a word? He'll never say that sentence correctly again. Accidentally made an innuendo? He's going to turn into a monster. Like most things, if it genuinely upsets you, he won't do it again. If you're only vaguely annoyed? Well, that's the reaction he's after.
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justplaggin · 1 year ago
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impeccable thought process
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marvelsgirl616 · 9 months ago
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Walk him like a dog
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obsessedwithstarwars · 10 months ago
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Jazz makes a deal with Desiree after finding her brother in their parent’s basement. And it’s not a pretty sight.
Her deal: Desiree gets a slightly longer leash (in a matter of speaking) as long as Danny and Jazz are safe. (Or something like that. Point is, she made a deal)
I wish this never happened and that Danny and I were safe somewhere else!
There’s a snap of fingers, a bright flash, then she’s outside in an unfamiliar city with sirens blaring and people wailing as a scarecrow runs by with some sort of gas, chased by someone dressed like Vlad adjacent except all black with a weird looking bat symbol on his chest.
Not normal, but also not the weirdest thing she’s seen.
But there’s no sign of Danny.
Desiree looks at Jazz and smiles bitterly, “I never said you’d be safe together.” And disappears.
Meanwhile, Danny wakes up screaming in an alley until he realizes he is not in pain and somehow has no wounds from their parents. His screams attract the attention of a man walking by, who comes to investigate, Danny decides to go invisible right in front of him which was dumb but he was injured just a couple seconds ago so cut him some slack. It really should have freaked the guy out, but he just has an astonished look on his face before also turning invisible.
Or: Jazz is sent to Gotham and Danny is sent to Coast City. Jazz becomes an unwilling part of scarecrow’s scheme (could be any villain) and is saved by a bat (any bat, although I prefer Red Hood or Robin) and Danny accidentally showed Martian Manhunter his powers.
Could work with Superman too in Metropolis. He could pick up a dumpster and throw it at Clark and Clark would calmly catch it while Danny is babbling/apologizing for getting scared and throwing something that could have killed the man, then slowly everything clicks and he disappears, leaving Clark Kent to investigate.
(Also background: Danny has just been told he will be the future Ghost King in this and Jazz was told by Clockwork that she would have a difficult decision and a difficult future in store but that it will be good for them and for the realms. Jazz doesn’t believe in fortune tellers, especially vague ones and says so to Clockwork’s face which cracks a smile. I’d personally write it as a Hardcover ship, but honestly if anyone wants to yoink this and do something else with it, I’d be okay with that too!)
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jamtamart · 13 days ago
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my awesome dean of the college of cardinals thomas lawrence fanart
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