#and various levels of pain
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thistle-inks · 11 months ago
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you ever get carried away with plotting so you gotta draw it?
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widowshill · 28 days ago
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— And do you or do you not have difficulty remembering such simple instructions? — Only during thunderstorms, sir.
THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965) / DARK SHADOWS (1966)
#don't mind me just absolutely insane about the possibility (probability!) that vicki saw tsom the year before coming to collinwood.#the boom mic in the stairs shot is always cracking me up.#finally me and you and you and me just us and your friend steve (the boom mic operator)#➤ roger collins & victoria winters. ┊ pain sometimes precedes pleasure,miss winters.#gifs.#➤ edits & art. ┊ the evans cottage art gallery.#➤ roger collins. ┊ I and my ghosts want a drink.#➤ victoria winters. ┊ because she’s lost and lonely. because she looks in shadows.#there's obviously far; far less of a christian overtone in ds — but i wonder if you couldn't make the argument that it isn't also#on some level about belief?#belief; namely; in the ghosts that roger resists and vicki with both arms embraces;#faith in the not-so-minor deity liz stoddard; choosing to follow her doctrine even in the face of conflicting truth.#one might consider collinsport a faithful congregation taking sermons from the mount — from the mouth of the reclusive ascetic;#conveyed by loyal (devastatingly; sacrificially loyal) disciples.#and vicki; searching for belonging; for a home; for a family; falls very lamb-like into the flock.#all old gods of course demand their sacrifices in blood: burke; namely; but also matthew; bill; roger (so-attempted)#if i were pushing it (which I always am) you could go so far as to say collinwood's son rises from the tomb.#''but the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night'' etc etc. demanding; first; sacrificial livestock; then virgin blood.#anyway! I digress.#''they say confession is good for the soul. well; my soul needs purifying.''#vicki as the prototypical virgin — the clean slate without history; clear water with neither dirt nor blood —#in which roger cleanses himself (somewhat forcefully!); to wash away guilt and suspicion;#the force of virtue that prevents the intrusion of sin; either through the wood of the confessional or very literally at her bedroom door.#''an innate sense of goodness'' etc; besides being something of a conduit between this world and the next:#re. the seances; the appearances of josette and bill; the various and varied encounters with supernatural; the time travel;#as one might expect of an angel ... or a saint. and one could argue that she goes on to restore roger's faith —#if not in the goodness of the world at large; then the existence of goodness; or in the worth of belief itself.#anyway. long way of saying i love man x his governess whether it's catholic or satanic. sign me up.
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einsatzzz · 7 months ago
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OC Crossovers (1/3): Tea Time with Myr and Lidija (@myrmyrtheorca 's OCs!) Kurumi may or may not be telling Lidija about shoujo manga while Myr is just chilling there and relaxing from the nice atmosphere.
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randomnameless · 1 month ago
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This piece of media has serious themes!
*me being a Bleach fan for 12 years and only within the last 3 have people realized that Bleach is the story that mostly closely integrates its themes into its power system. So I've been dealing with "Bleach bad" by man-children who finally "get it" with the hindsight of a new anime.* 😔
Hi!
TBF, from the "big 3" I think Bleach is the one who aged the best, new season or not, even if I ultimately think the weekly release rythm from the jump hurt it more than it helped, especially because it was seen as "competing" with Naruto and OP who were/are, I'd say, not on the same sector even if, at the end of the day, they're all shonens.
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dihalect · 1 year ago
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my department is apparently no longer hybrid, but “on-site with ad-hoc remote work”. i’m just gonna see how long i can get away with ignoring that
#txt#i do have an accommodation that says i can wfh when i have a migraine.#but when i was asking for the accommodation i guesstimated that that’d intersect with my in-person days like once or twice a month.#i do absolutely need to have the option to wfh multiple times per week.#but getting an accommodation for THAT is going to be way more difficult. bc it’s not JUST migraines‚ it’s a combination of my various psych#afflictions and not-properly-diagnosed chronic pain *and* the complex whole-body rube goldberg pain machine that is my chronic migraines.#it’s not necessarily ‘i will be in unbearable pain if i do this’.#it’s ‘i will be perpetually drained and my low-level pain will be worse snd i will have no life outside of work and recuperating from work’.#it’s also weird that they’re ending hybridhood *now*.#it’s not like we’re at a particular milestone in pandemic recovery. although our admin did mention entering a ‘busy period’.#it’s not even necessary lmao. we get by fine. we get by BETTER when we’re not all there.#oh man. i just realized. everyone being on-site is gonna make the autism/anxiety so much worse.#i honestly think this policy shift might be related to me.#bc our program director started emphasizing the importance of being onsite on x days… shortly after i started working hybrid‚ but had to wfh#on some of those days#for disability reasons.#anyway. government pleeeaaase give my old lab more money so i can go back. pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaazeeeee#edited
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coffeebanana · 1 year ago
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i just think that in the middle of pride month it's a little homopobic that the end of my fic won't write itself
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oswednesday · 1 year ago
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i think its cool of my immortal soul deciding this life cycle will be about experiencing different kinds of pain, this is so educational and enriching
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goingdowntocowtown · 2 years ago
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talking to my dad about middle eastern stuff is just *looks at mum for support*
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the-yearning-astronaut · 2 years ago
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My right thumb fuckin hurts tonight. As do my wrists. Both hands have weird numb patches across them. I've got spasms and twitching happening and no grip strength.
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battywitch · 3 months ago
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😬😬😬
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growling · 3 months ago
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Hate being tired 99% of the time >:((
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the-sera · 3 months ago
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My name is Sera, you may not know me but you know my past work behind the scenes here and there, such as the Mass Effect trilogy, Dragon Age, Silent Hills, and many others.
I am an agoraphobic indigenous Kanienʼkehá:ka (Mohawk) mixed lesbian who has fought for several years a worsening health condition that is currently killing me. The point of no return is not that far away. I have spent years exhausting any paths and means to get help, enduring extreme and near endless pain. I have sold all I have, spent every dime to my name. I have received various forms of help over the years in this battle, but I have reached the critical point I have feared all this time. And to make matters worst, the family responsible for inflicting a lifetime of abuse on me is stalking me very heavily online, which has not only exacerbated my agoraphobia, but has also made the efforts to build this harder than I could describe. Know that I share as many details as I can while seeking to avoid undermining my immediate safety, I hope you understand. This post is a highly abridged version of the content in the link, the unabridged and unedited version is available below the Read More cut ❤
If you have been following me for a while, you are familiar with my struggle and saw me talking about it throughout the years. There are no other options or help besides this, besides you. I need your help or I'm going to die, this is the last chance I have left. I'm afraid to my core, I still have a life in front of me, dreams to pursue. If you read this far, I know you may be inclined to share and move on, but I am asking you to pause and think if you have a dollar that could make all the difference. I know it can be troublesome to stop and actually do it, I am asking you to please consider doing it.
If you yourself have a health condition, I salute you for fighting your own battle. Regardless of whether you donate or not, if you read this far, know that you are loved.
A warm thank you to @transmechanicus , the kind soul who made this possible. I would be lost and doomed without your help. Erika did not believe thank yous were necessary, but they are. Attempting to save a human being's life is no small act. Whether it succeeds or fail, no thank yous will ever be enough. Even as the pain consumes my body, I am able to feel hope thanks to this. There are no words invented to express this level of thanks, but if I get to live, I will search for it.
(Please don't put tags on this unless it is to actually talk or comment something. As always, kind words are appreciated.)
My name is Sera, you may not know me but you know my past work behind the scenes here and there, such as the Mass Effect Trilogy, Dragon Age, Silent Hills, and many others.
I am an agoraphobic indigenous Kanienʼkehá:ka (Mohawk) mixed lesbian who has fought for several years a worsening health condition that is currently killing me. The point of no return is not that far away. I have spent years exhausting any paths and means to get help, enduring extreme and near endless pain. I have sold all I have, spent every dime to my name. The system, I feel, is indifferent to my situation. I have received various forms of help over the years in this battle, but I have reached the critical point I have feared all this time. And to make matters worst, the family responsible for inflicting a lifetime of abuse on me is stalking me very heavily online, which has not only exacerbated my agoraphobia, but has also made the efforts to build this harder than I could describe. Know that I share as many details as I can while seeking to avoid undermining my immediate safety, I hope you understand.
If you are reading this, you are one of the few people who can help save my life. A single dollar is enough to make a tremendous difference. There is no other options or source of help besides this, besides you. I need your help or I'm going to die, this is the last chance I have left.
The goal is a series of treatments and challenging surgeries that will remove small metal shards near vital organs and bones in my body. It is categorized as severe internal injuries secondary to a traumatic event. As medical professionals have put it, "the lack of immediate surgical intervention necessitates a comprehensive, multidisciplinary treatment approach aimed at mitigating the risk of disease progression and optimizing long-term outcomes."
My injuries are from a car accident which injured me immensely and took the lives of my two closest friends in the world. This page does not ask for the full amount of the procedures and treatments, since it is a very large sum of money that cannot be reached that quickly. The page only asks for enough to get me started in the process and access proper vital treatments in countries of the european union. Adding time to the clock, giving me a chance to fight this battle and launching an important part of the process towards saving my life.
I know you may be inclined to share and move on, but I am asking you to pause and think if you have a dollar that could make all the difference. You may be but a few clicks away from truly helping someone who desperately needs it. I know it can be troublesome to stop and actually do it, I am asking you to please consider doing it.
If this fails to reach its goal, I will die. I'm afraid and I need your help. I still have a life in front of me, dreams to pursue. If you read this far, you are the only chance I have left. Don't underestimate the difference a dollar can make, your dollar could be the one dollar we come short of. The expenses covered by this amount ranges from the medical consultations, medical treatments, surgeries and, of course, accessing said treatment, reaching the places where I need to go. I will have a true chance at fighting for the remaining amount myself.
As for cheaper alternatives, it is mainly temporary fixes that would not fix the issue and waitlists that I would die waiting on years before my turn comes. This is it, this is the only way I have that provides the care I need, in the timeframe I need it, with a success rate that gives me a chance to live.
Thank you for reading this and for persevering in the brutal system we all live under. If you yourself have a health condition, I salute you for fighting your own battle. May we all make it and may we all have the softest of epilogues. Regardless of whether you donate or not, if you read this far, know that you are loved.
I would like to thank Erika, a dear friend who has made this possible at all. Without her, I would be lost. I would also like to thank immensely Milica, who has been on this journey with me for so many years, almost since the beginning. Her medical knowledge and her kind heart, her support and dedication, have allowed me to survive long enough to get to this point. I would not be here still without her. I would like to thank the amazing and loving Dana, who has been here during the good days as much as the bad days. She has been a beacon preventing me from giving up hope. I would have abandonned before getting to this point had she not been there for me. And thank you to Oli, who has been my champion, it is thanks to his help that I can move around where I need to go. A great support and a great friend. I would like to also thank Bruna, a kind heart who has never failed to cheer me on, even when her life was not perfect, she never stopped cheering and supporting me.
I would also like to thank my tumblr mutuals, you know who you are, those who have been in my DMs offering me your kindness, laughter and support in these dark times. Your help has also saved me more than once. You are true blessings. Thank you for never giving up hope during the days I felt like doing so.
You have all carried the torch during the days I couldn't, and for that, I can never thank you enough. I have lived and survived because of you, your help in every form has made a difference in the world. I am ready to fight for my life, and whether I reach my goal and live, or fail and die, know that none of it was wasted. You have all made me a better person and that is the mark of true love transpiring from one person to the next. Thank you for believing in me when I could not. I love you all.
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ushealthrealsolutions · 1 year ago
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Unlocking the Potential of CBD Oil: A Natural Remedy for Wellness
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In recent years, CBD oil has gained significant attention for its potential health benefits, leading many to explore this natural remedy as a way to enhance their overall wellness. CBD, short for cannabidiol, is one of the many compounds found in the cannabis plant. Unlike its counterpart, THC (tetrahydrocannabinol), CBD is non-psychoactive, meaning it doesn't produce the "high" associated with marijuana. This quality has made CBD oil a promising option for those seeking relief from various ailments without the side effects typically associated with traditional medications.
CBD oil is commonly derived from industrial hemp, a cannabis variety containing minimal THC levels. Its popularity can be attributed to its potential to alleviate a range of symptoms, such as chronic pain, anxiety, depression, and even epilepsy. Research and anecdotal evidence suggest that CBD interacts with the body's endocannabinoid system, which plays a crucial role in regulating various bodily functions, including pain perception, mood, and immune response.
Furthermore, CBD oil is available in various forms, including tinctures, capsules, topicals, and edibles, allowing users to choose the most suitable method for their specific needs. It is essential to consult with a healthcare professional before incorporating CBD oil into your wellness routine, especially if you have underlying medical conditions or are taking other medications.
While the potential benefits of CBD oil are promising, it's important to remember that the industry is still evolving, and research is ongoing. As more studies are conducted, our understanding of CBD's full range of applications will likely expand. For those looking for a natural alternative to traditional treatments, CBD oil may hold the key to unlocking a healthier, more balanced life.
#CBD oil has gained significant attention for its potential health benefits#leading many to explore this natural remedy as a way to enhance their overall wellness. CBD#short for cannabidiol#is one of the many compounds found in the cannabis plant. Unlike its counterpart#THC (tetrahydrocannabinol)#CBD is non-psychoactive#meaning it doesn't produce the “high” associated with marijuana. This quality has made CBD oil a promising option for those seeking relief#CBD oil is commonly derived from industrial hemp#a cannabis variety containing minimal THC levels. Its popularity can be attributed to its potential to alleviate a range of symptoms#such as chronic pain#anxiety#depression#and even epilepsy. Research and anecdotal evidence suggest that CBD interacts with the body's endocannabinoid system#which plays a crucial role in regulating various bodily functions#including pain perception#mood#and immune response.#Furthermore#CBD oil is available in various forms#including tinctures#capsules#topicals#and edibles#allowing users to choose the most suitable method for their specific needs. It is essential to consult with a healthcare professional befor#especially if you have underlying medical conditions or are taking other medications.#While the potential benefits of CBD oil are promising#it's important to remember that the industry is still evolving#and research is ongoing. As more studies are conducted#our understanding of CBD's full range of applications will likely expand. For those looking for a natural alternative to traditional treatm#In recent years
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obsessivevoidkitten · 2 months ago
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The Invasion
Cat Man Alien Yandere x Gender Neutral Reader
CW: Painful noncon, reader gets smacked, biting, collaring, owner/pet, pet reader, reader tied up, reader is an idiot, alien invasion, shapeshifting, general yandere behavior
Word Count: 1.2k
(Popped into my head, finished at 2-3am this morning, hope you all like it. Please leave comments and consider tipping to support the senior's bake sale, I love you all <3)
Twiggy was a rescue. He had been brought into the animal shelter you worked at and was pretty injured. Once he was nursed back to health, you immediately adopted him.
He was a bit standoffish, even by cat standards, but he slowly seemed to tolerate you. Then, almost actually like you. It's like he would enjoy affection and then catch himself and hiss before running off.
Even though you made sure never to let him outside, he always seemed to get out anyway, mostly in the dead of night. 
In an effort to discover just how he was escaping, you set up cameras. But they always ended up knocked down or broken before catching anything. Then you put a cat cam on him, but every night, he would fling it off after you went to sleep.
You had enough. It was getting creepy. You decided you would follow him. He never tried to leave while you were awake, though, so you had to pretend to sleep. 
The sound of the door could very faintly be heard closing, so you got up silently and slunk into the living room.
Astonished, you looked at the door. It had been unlocked, and Twiggy was missing. He had somehow figured out how to open doors. It wasn't entirely unheard of for a cat to manage a door handle, but the lock?
You quietly left the building and saw Twiggy moving with purpose down the road.
After a while, you thought yourself stupid. He was just going to do random cat stuff. Why were you following him? He probably just smelled something that gripped his attention.
But as he kept going through various alleys and back roads, a few other cats joined him without any reaction from him. They proceeded in orderly and determined fashion right into the old abandoned factory. 
You followed and had to hold back a gasp at what you saw. Down in the basement level was Twiggy standing on a pile of scrap with dozens of other cats gathering below him.
It was some sort of cat cult. 
But if you thought that was shocking, you hadn't seen anything yet. Suddenly, Twiggy effortlessly shifted into a nude man with curly brown hair, a tail, and cat ears on his head.
After he transformed, all the others did the same. The room was filled with naked men and women with tails and cat ears. This was getting too weird. The best course of action now was to make a silent retreat.
As you began to back away, Twiggy pointed in your direction and stated something you were too far to really hear.
In a flash, the cat people were upon you, dragging you over to Twiggy and forcing you to kneel before him before they tied you up and gagged you so you couldn't speak. 
He addressed the others without sparing a glance at you. 
"I infiltrated this human's place of employment and then their home." 
He stroked your hair in a manner similar to the way you would pet him in his cat form. 
"I have learned that we can use their workplace as a front and get adopted as their pets. We will use this method to infiltrate every home before taking over and turning humans into OUR pets!"
Twiggy turned to an androgynous looking cat person.
"River, I need you to take the form of this human and work at the shelter as we discussed at the last meeting. Come over tomorrow to my human's house, and I'll give you the schedule."
River nodded in affirmation.
After that, the meeting came to an end, and Twiggy dismissed the others. He pulled the gag off of you and allowed you to speak.
"Twiggy, w-what's go-"
The cat man smacked you harshly. It left an echo resounding through the large empty room. 
"That's a gross pet name. My real name is Declan."
You whimpered and then flinched when he pet the spot he had smacked gingerly. 
"Sorry, I shouldn't have hurt you, you didn't know… You probably have lots of questions."
Of course, you had questions. And Twig- Declan… answered every one of them patiently. 
He explained that the cat people were aliens who just happened to have a form that looked like a common earth house pet. They could also look like any human they wanted, though they had to hide their feline features. He was the leader. And now that you were aware of everything, you got to be the first pet. His personal one. He promised to treat you well.
After the Q&A, he put on some clothes he had and took you back to what was no longer your house. He put your gag back in so you couldn't scream on the way.
True to his word, he treated you like a precious pampered pet, since you had helped heal him and took such good care of him. He even gave you a jeweled collar for you to wear as proof he owned and cared for you.
Though he had started to care about you in ways that he probably shouldn't have.
But after a while, he couldn't help it anymore. One night when your head was laying on his lap while the two of you watched a show he liked, something he forced you to do as he stroked your arm and side, his cock stirred under your head, and he had to give in.
He stripped you of all your clothes; you struggled and protested, but his strong, lean body easily overpowered your own.
He pulled off your collar and bit your neck hard to get you to submit as he mounted you, before shoving his cock in you deeply all at once with no preparation. 
The cat man fucked into you ferally, going off pure instinct, pushing your head into the couch cushion so no one could hear your screams.
You were sure you were going to die, that you were going to be split apart by his girthy cock, that the last things you would hear were your muffled screams, the sound of his nuts slamming into you, and his animalistic growls.
Declan's cock pistoned in and out roughly as tears streamed down your face. You felt a sense of shame as he forced you to orgasm despite the cruelty of the way he was violating you.
It wasn't enough that he took your house, job, and way of life and eventually would take your planet, but now he was claiming your insides with his throbbing cock as well.
He came in you roughly and finally seemed to gradually come back to his senses. He licked away your tears and the blood and cum that were mingled and leaking from your hole.
"I'm so sorry, I just couldn't help myself! I'll be more gentle and use lube next time, okay?"
The cat man comforted you as best he could, bathing you as you sobbed. He sincerely regretted hurting you, but he couldn't deny his instincts and really needed some release. Going forward, he decided you would be his mate as well as his pet, so he didn't go wild with pent-up emotions again. 
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ms-demeanor · 3 months ago
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wait, are the health claims from bone broth bogus? (genuine/good faith question). i’ve always heard that it’s high in collagen, which supposedly is good for you and better if you get it ‘naturally’ like from bone broth. is that another thing that’s not actually true, or wildly exaggerated?
Bone broth has been eaten for centuries in various cultures because it is easy to digest and believed to have healing properties. Chicken broth is highly valued by some as a remedy for the flu. In more recent years it has been promoted to help symptoms from psychiatric and neurodevelopmental disorders including autism and attention-deficit hyperactivity. [7] Claims that it detoxifies the liver, improves digestion, reverses wrinkles, builds bones, and relieves join pain have led some marketing analysts to predict that the bone broth market will approach $3 billion by 2024. [8] In reality, bone broth contains only small amounts of minerals naturally found in bone including calcium, magnesium, potassium, iron, phosphorus, sodium, and copper. The amount of protein, obtained from the gelatin, varies from 5-10 grams per cup. There is some concern that bone broth contains toxic metals like lead. One small study found that bone broth made from chicken bones contained three times the lead as chicken broth made with the meat only. [7] However the amount of lead in the bone broth per serving was still less than half the amount permitted by the Environmental Protection Agency in drinking water. A different study found that bone broth, both homemade and commercially produced, contained low levels (<5% RDA) of calcium and magnesium as well as heavy metals like lead and cadmium. [9] The study noted that various factors can affect the amount of protein and minerals extracted in bone broth: the amount of acidity, cooking time, cooking temperature, and type of animal bone used. Therefore it is likely that the nutritional value of bone broths will vary widely.
(Source: https://nutritionsource.hsph.harvard.edu/collagen/)
Your body makes collagen; eating collagen will put the things that make collagen into your body to make collagen with, but so will eating things that go into making collagen (amino acids, basically).
There's not good evidence that eating a ton of collagen or supplementing collagen improves your body's collagen production, and studies on collagen supplementation tend to be done by companies that make collagen supplements or produce expensive bone broth.
Basically if you're eating the 9 essential amino acids by consuming complete proteins (which can be done on any kind of diet, vegan or vegetarian or including meat - this is NOT one of those things your body relies on animal products to produce) your body is going to make collagen and it's going to have the amino acids handy to make collagen; consuming more collagen may mean that your body has more of those collagen-forming amino acids on hand, but it doesn't mean that your body is going to be any more efficient at producing collagen (and your body is going to become less efficient at producing collagen as you age).
But yeah bone broth health claims are primarily bogus. If you want more collagen in your diet for whatever reason, it's probably about as effective to eat jello as it is to eat bone broth but also more collagen in your diet likely isn't doing anything special.
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blkkizzat · 6 months ago
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❛ MY SHORTY ALWAYS ON SOME BULLSHIT LIKE CHICAGO ❜
PART 2
part of the 420 'We Be Burnin' series
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⋙ MENU ITEM: PLUG!CHOSO x SORORITYBRAT!READER ⋙ PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 (completed)
⋙ product description (summary): okay so you finally realized how badly you fucked up. but is it too late? will choso even talk to you now? has he moved on for good or is it that you now have to worry about someone else moving onto him? ⋙ side effects (tw): more drama. more angst. teasing. jealousy. thirsting. mentions of sex and oral sex. intoxication with drug & alcohol use. sending nudes. y/n is still a brat. bitchy sorority sisters. party culture. ⋙ thc levels (wc): 8.2k of 22.1k ⋙ inventory notes (a/n): best viewed in dark mode. i appreciate y'all liking this sm hope you don't mind i split this up more, but the second part was getting too unruly in length lol
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Plug!Choso who you thought forgetting about would be relatively easy. Overwhelmed with the sheer amount of new presidential duties, you had no shortage of various meetings to keep you occupied. Even so, Choso had a way of popping into your mind as the most routine things would remind you of him. 
You couldn’t go get a fresh set of nails without expecting to see his tinted blacked-out sedan parked outside waiting for you. Scrolling socials had also become annoying as you’d see a post and immediately want to send it to Choso— your sorority sisters would think you were gross if you sent them mukbang videos. You couldn’t even bake anything anymore, especially anything chocolate, without reminding yourself of how much Yuji hated nuts in his chocolate chip cookies. 
Or even now when you had been walking across campus with your sisters and chatting about the massive proposal plan of next year’s sorority activities. A daunting task on its own which you had to submit to your national chapter by the end of the month. In fact, there were a lot of tedious things you realized you’d now be responsible for as president. 
However, all of that flew out of your mind when a car sped by blasting a familiar rock song— one that Choso always played. 
Stopping in your tracks you whipped your head around but the music was coming from a completely different car. The disappointment in your chest felt like you were suffocating.
The song was the first one from Choso’s ‘stoner emo boy playlist’ that you’d actually admitted you liked so he made sure to play it whenever you came around. You didn’t think you were official enough to have a song, but it felt like you did when you’d heard it just now. 
Although what pained you more in the moment was the fact Choso hadn’t even bothered to text you since the day of the brunch. Your pride and guilt kept you from texting him initially but after the first week you caved and did what you once thought was unthinkable— texting a guy first. 
You’d thought he’d answer instantly, happy you’d finally forgiven him for nearly ruining your brunch and you did want to apologize for missing Yuji’s game. But when 20 minutes turned into an hour and an hour turned into the entire day you realized he was ignoring you.
Choso was a dealer. 
He always had his phone on him. In fact, Choso used to respond to you so fast you wondered if he’d always kept your messages up on his screen.
The seriousness hits home when more of your texts go unanswered as the days go by. 
You huffed. 
Two weeks had passed since you first reached out and apparently Choso was still giving you the cold shoulder. Unconsciously chewing on your manicured french tips, your intrusive thoughts paint the absolute worst scenarios. 
This was around the time of day he’d usually be on campus and you’d meet up in the empty garage. 
Would he be there now doing another deal? 
Or giving ‘discounts’ to another girl?
You shook your head. Choso wasn’t like that. 
You knew he wasn’t.
Then again he had stuffed your guts in less than 10 minutes of knowing each other.
But you were the exception right? Choso wouldn’t move on just like that, would he? 
Rejection wasn’t something you had dealt with often in your life or well, ever. 
You’d gotten everything you wanted since you were little whether it was something you worked for or something given to you. 
So what if you didn’t have Choso?
You should be content with life. 
You had everything you’d ever wanted right now. 
You were pretty, got damn near perfect grades and now had the title of sorority president for fuckssake! 
Meeting someone like Choso was never part of your plans and didn’t fit into them either, so you had never really considered what the both of you were to be anything long-term. 
Nor did you ever stop to consider what he thought of your relationship. 
You thought he’d lick his wounds for a few days and forgive you. However with each passing day the thought he might really be done with you sinks in more and more.
Regardless of the legion of frat guys who would jump at the chance to date you, the only guy you really wanted right now apparently wanted fuck all to do with you. 
Ok so maybe you deserve the silent treatment. 
A lot. 
You never been that big of a bitch to him before. But you really had panicked when he showed up out of the blue with your parents on the way! Also if he didn’t go and threaten the DJ like he did???
You sighed. 
No, even under more peaceful circumstances the end result was you weren’t going to leave to go to Yuji’s game. You couldn’t blame him for being furious with you as you knew how protective he was of his younger brother but you at least wish he’d hear you out.
Just for one last time and maybe you could make it up to Yuji too? 
Get him a nice gift for missing his little league game and bake him chocolate chip cookies—without the nuts. You wanted to hear him adorably ramble on which would always be accompanied by animated hand movements while he gave you the rundown. Yuji often roped in Choso as well, who would be all too happy to play whatever role or prop Yuji needed him for. 
Their identical grins, goofy and filled with joy never failed to put a smile on your face. A smile which came easy as there was never any demands put on you when you were with them. No pretending for the sake of appearances, no worrying about social standing and no expectations for favors. 
With them you were just you and they had accepted you.
But had you accepted them? 
Shit. 
Yeah you had fucked up big. 
You knew you needed to talk to Choso and if you weren’t all but certain Choso would slam the door in your face, you’d have half a mind to go pop up at his house. 
Although maybe if Yuji ans—
“—Like HELLO!? Earth to Prez!”
Your train of thought abruptly comes to an end when one of your sorority sisters—Brianna—rudely snaps their fingers in your face. 
Bitch. 
She’d been bitter ever since she’d lost the presidency to you. 
Elections were over so you didn't have to worry about staying on everyone's good side like you had been doing for the last 3 years of being super sweet and non confrontational. Even so, snatching up a fellow sister certainly wouldn’t make a good impression for a newly appointed president.
“What IS it Brie!?” 
Turning to face her you had no choice but to keep your cool.
“Don’t give me attitude! You’re the one not paying attention, space case.”  
Brianna huffed accusingly. 
“Yeah, Brie’s kinda right Prez, you’ve been a little bit distracted lately.” 
Another one of your sisters chimed in—immediately looking down when your eyes narrowed on her.
“Don't tell me the pressure is already getting to ‘Little Miss Legacy'? Or—”
Brianna flips her hair with a sly smile before continuing.
“—is it just that you miss your burnout stalker boy?” 
“E-Excuse me!?”
Extremely disarmed by the allegation, you were not expecting in a million years the very person you were thinking of to be brought up like this by Brianna of all people. 
“You know—you’ve been acting off since the brunch a few weeks ago and we used to be practically swimming in za—way more o’s than we paid for. You must have been doing something to get all that from that future convict and he must be pretty pissed with you if you haven’t been able to get anymore since.”
The rest of your sisters were gagged at the accusations Brianna was tossing your way as it was true that your supply had been dwindling. Their eyes darted between the two of you but mostly focused on you waiting for your response. 
You ignore them though as all your ire was on Brianna.
This whore had some fucking nerve speaking about Choso like that. 
The thought of knocking the smug look off Brianna’s face is almost too tempting —presidency be damned. 
Yet your own guilt stops you.
Too little, much too late for you to be standing up for Choso now the way you had dismissed him so harshly in front of Brianna and the rest of your sisters just a few weeks ago. You could only be mad at yourself, your own actions showed them how to treat Choso.
That didn’t mean you were going to let her get away with it without a proper lashing though. 
“Listen—Brie, Little Miss Legacy is busy juggling the presidency, a 3.8 gpa, volunteer work and planning every goddamn sorority event worth attending. As for you? Well I heard you’d been pretty busy these days juggling your creepy ass T.A. Noaya’s balls because you were going to fail Biology again for the third time—so do you really want to talk about pressure or whose fucking whom for what?”
Standing up for yourself wasn’t something you ever did in an effort to be likable and so Briana, as well as the rest of your sisters, were stunned into silence. 
Even if her fucking for grades had been no secret, it wasn’t something anyone talked about out loud and yet you’d gladly air her out again for insulting Choso.
“Urgh, whatever! Anyways while you were daydreaming we were planning Jeremy's birthday party on Saturday.”
You rolled your eyes at the inattention to some random frat guy’s bday being the reason for this whole confrontation.  
“Oookay and—?”
“—and we need you to get some more za from your stalk— er um, I mean your plug...” 
Brianna quickly corrects herself seeing your eyes flare.  
“Jermey wants a joint filled pinata and we don’t have nearly enough right now to roll all those joints.”
You suck your teeth in annoyance. 
Of course it all had to come back around to Choso.
“I’m not talking to him right now. We’ll find someone else.” 
Well it was half true, more like he wasn’t talking to you. 
You tried not to pout and completely give yourself away at how much it really was affecting you.
“Well start again, Prez! You know his stuff is the best!”
“We already promised everyone we’d have it!” 
“Please Prez!”
The rest of your sorority sisters chimed in.  
“Yeah Prez it shouldn’t be a problem. Send him an ass pic or something, I bet he would respond to that.” 
The rest of your sisters giggled in agreement. 
Little did they know you had already sent Choso nudes 8 days ago, which when you checked Snap last just 10 minutes ago he still hadn’t opened yet. 
You’d die before admitting that though.
“Fine. I’ll figure it out.” 
“Knew you would Prez!” 
Brianna tossed you a fake smile as she turned around and your sisters followed suit walking back towards the sorority house. The chatter now moves on to drink options as the previous conversation is instantly forgotten. 
You still flip the bitch off behind her back though before you catch up to join the conversation lest these dumb bitches skimp out on drinks for more decorations and have you all drinking Monarch vodka again—gross, much more so than a mukbang video.
Plug!Choso who later that night has you laying on your bed staring at your phone suspended over you, your finger hovering over the send button. 
What if he ignored you this time too? 
Worse—what if he had finally blocked you?
Well all your messages had gone through so far even though his read receipts were off. 
Choso hadn’t blocked you yet. 
Only two days had passed since you last texted him but scrolling through your history the wall of blue taking over the entire screen had you feeling vexed.
Hadn’t Choso punished you enough? 
Biting your lip in apprehension you hit send. 
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You almost dropped your phone on your face. Sitting up in your bed you stare at his text incredulously as the sticker shock of Choso jacking up the price by $150 hits you.
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You deserved that, you supposed. 
But fuck you knew you’d have to come up out of pocket yourself for the extra and you couldn’t admit to your sisters why the price had gone up so much again.
At least he was answering you though. 
You threw your phone across your bed. 
Well that went super. 
You’d hope you’d have the chance to talk about things while he was responding to you, maybe get him to video call you? You knew he still wouldn’t be thrilled with you but you didn’t expect his responses to be that short once he finally answered. 
Choso always over texted you if anything, sending paragraphs at times so these clipped messages were like tiny daggers pricking you with each one you received.  
You didn’t think you could handle him being mean to you like this for much longer. 
Getting a taste of your own medicine fucking sucked.
With a sigh you had decided to push it to the back of your mind. It was Tuesday and he wasn’t even coming until Friday.
That’s when you realized Choso implied he was coming to you. 
As in your sorority house. 
On Friday. 
The night of the Barbie’s Dreamhouse Kegger. 
Goddamnit.
Plug!Choso who shows up to your sorority house on Friday night just before midnight when the kegger is at its peak. Choso doesn’t give a single fuck this time around that he sticks out like a sore thumb with his dark tattered jeans, matching leather jacket, heavy eyeliner and metal piercings amongst all the colorful and peppy pastel attired party-goers. 
Choso waltzes right through the front door like he owns the place.
“Oh! It's you! Finally!” 
Flipping her hair behind her to show off her ample cleavage, your sorority sister Brianna bounces over to Choso who continues to look past her as his eyes scan the foyer.
To be honest he wasn’t even sure she was talking to him until she mentioned you.
“You’re the plug, right? Choso? Here for Prez, hmm?” 
Brianna appraised Choso with a flirty glance and a smile. 
“I’m Brianna, but everyone calls me Brie. She’s outside with her boys! I’ll take you there, kay?”
Her boys?
Brianna batts her eyes sweetly to complement her peppy demeanor. 
Choso simply nods, appearing unphased as Brianna grabs him by the arm of his jacket to lead him through the sea of people crowding the hall and out to the backyard. The very same backyard where you had rejected and humiliated him to save your own superficial social standing just a few weeks ago. 
Of course he hadn’t forgotten. 
Choso noted this time though the expansive yard had a completely different vibe from the pretentious scene he’d walked into before. The backyard was now filled with pink inflatable decorations and rose gold plastered party supplies, trading the expensive crystal for matching pink solo cups and decorative flower displays for shotskis. 
Yet Choso’s comparisons end once he finally spots you in the crowd. 
Playing beer pong with some frat fucks, carefree like you had zero concerns (or thoughts of him) in the world as you taunted your opponents. 
Choso’s eyes narrow when you—clad in a scandalously small pink sparkly tube top—brought a dainty manicured nail to your chest and seductively dragged it down your cleavage to tug at the hem of the fabric. The tops of your tits swell over the edge of the material provocatively as you tease the chance they might altogether spill out onto the table if you pulled any lower.
The plan worked and your opponents thoroughly distracted missed their shots much to your amused squeals and Choso’s growing irritation. His brow twitched as he noticed the rest of your outfit which barely provided any more coverage. 
The matching mini skirt you wore rested low enough on your curvy hips to show the very edges of your thong but high enough on your thighs that your cheeks were nearly peeking out just from the slight bend you took as you aimed to take your next shot. Your pink jeweled belly ring (that he’d bought you) and gem adorned nude fishnets lead down to chunky hot pink glitter pumps only calling more attention to your lower half as they were illuminated by the outdoor tiki lights.
Why were you dressed like such a slut and letting those greasy shitheads drool all over you? 
Your beer pong partner was clearly exaggerating his drunkenness for an excuse to feel you up as his hand rested dangerously close to the top of your ass as you took your next shot. 
Were you that clueless?
Choso’s jaw clenches as you allow yourself to be pulled in by the shoulder tits first into a celebratory hug after landing a cup off a bounce, thus removing two. The way you’d casually let those assholes gawk and grab at you when you wouldn’t even make eye contact with him in public pisses him off like none other and reminds him why he had decided to cut you off after all.
This time though Choso doesn’t march over, masking his resentment with nonchalance as he considers leaving altogether. 
Sure he needed the money—but it wouldn’t make or break him in the long run. 
Keeping the big picture in mind, Choso had Yuji to think of and he couldn’t afford to catch a case over your slutty ass if he actually gave into the urge to knock some random frat fucker’s teeth out.
Yet Choso switches his attention back to Brianna when she returns with a beer filled cup for him and her sheer top unbuttoned even lower. 
Oh? 
Choso grins. 
Plug!Choso who you finally notice standing near the back door of your sorority house next to—Brianna?!…urgh! 
Her obnoxious high-pitched laughter loudly cut through the music and party chatter to draw your attention over. 
What the hell was Choso even doing with her?! 
You grit your teeth as Choso takes the drink. You watch as he reclines against the house and cheers cups together. Brianna is twirling her hair innocently as she flirts with him, giggling like an idiot. 
One without an ounce of shame at that. 
You seethe as she clutches onto his bicep pulling herself closer and resting her tits on his arm when she pretends to momentarily lose her balance. 
Stupid cunt ass bitch. 
You know it's just to spite you too. 
Of course Brianna still didn’t know of the true nature of your relationship with Choso for certain but a backstabbing whore like her would try to fuck him solely off an inkling. 
If anything just so she could say your ‘stalker’ was now hers.
She was just using him! Did Choso not see that?! 
Your beer pong partner slides his arm around you to tell you it’s your turn again but you don’t even spare him a backwards glance as you shrug him off. Abandoning the game and ignoring his puzzled calls after you. 
Truthfully it doesn’t even register as you are on your warpath with Choso and Brianna in your sights, stomping directly towards them like you were on a mission. You were too, as far as you were concerned, determined to break that shit up expeditiously. 
Especially now as you see Brianna airdropping her contact info to Choso.
Stopping directly in front of them you’re far too tipsy to prevent your souring mood from spreading all over your face when they both seem to not notice you right away.  
You loudly clear your throat.
“AHEM!”
Staring at Choso expectantly your lip curls when it's Brianna who greets you first instead.
“Oh Prez, my B girly! We didn’t notice you there!” 
“Whatever, Brie.”
You sneer at her. 
Although Brianna only giggles again, feigning innocence and leaning into Choso a bit more. 
The whore was still touching up on him.
“I was just keeping Cho here company until we found you.”
Bullshit, they were searching fo– Hol’ the fuck up—CHO?! 
Did this whore just call him Cho?! 
That was your fucking nickname for him! Only you and Yuji were allowed to call him that!
Oh Brianna was just begging for that ass whooping, dying for it even. 
Swaying on your feet, your buzz only intensifies your anger and folding your arms in front of you serves two purposes at the moment: 
To keep your balance as you try to prevent your heels from sinking into the grass— but more importantly— because the urge to yank a bitch was escalating to the point your hands were now twitching. 
You had drank way too much in your nervousness waiting for Choso.  
You thought a quick round of beer pong would settle your anxieties as you’d been hanging out near the front door all day and night not knowing when he’d show up. However time had slipped away from you and one game had turned into three. 
You didn’t even really know the guys you were playing with, just some random freshman!
Of course once you finally let your guard down Choso would not only show up but be hanging out with your biggest opp!
But what really had you about to crack—Choso was taking his sweet time in acknowledging you as he appeared to be more concerned with checking Brianna’s contact info than speaking to you right in front of him. “Ight, got it.” 
Choso confirmed and slid his phone back into his jacket before pulling out a joint as he finally made eye contact with you.
THE FUCK!? HE ACTUALLY SAVED IT?! 
Plug!Choso who stares at you with a condescending smirk as his eyes twinkled with sadistic amusement before exhaling smoke towards the sky.
You bite your cheek to hold back your angry tears, you weren’t about to give Brianna the satisfaction. She could fuck right the hell off as far as you were concerned, only wanting to speak to Choso who was currently looking at you like you were the one interrupting something.
“W-Why didn't you text me you were here?! I would have come outside!” 
Your words fumble out of you drunkenly, not sounding one bit as smooth and unbothered as you hoped.
“For why tho? Don’t you have me silenced anyway, Prez?”
You stiffened. 
Even if he wasn’t silenced right now you couldn’t deny you had previously silenced him before the last few weeks of trying to get him to talk to you. 
“Yea figured—so thought it’d be best to come inside…”
Choso exhales smoke through his nose this time, leering down at you as he passes the joint to Brianna who eagerly takes it.
“You really think I’m still tryna wait for you?”
Choso’s words are crushing as the double meaning behind them is not lost on you. Parting your glossed lips you couldn’t even form a sentence as your mouth had gone completely dry.
Brows raised Choso is practically daring you to challenge him. 
But you’re frozen. 
Ironic, because his eyes are all but intensely burning into yours as his accusingly cruel question penetrated you like a hot knife to butter. 
However, bringing you back, Brianna interrupts the moment—because of course she does—not being able to read the damn room nor handle the attention being away from her for 5 fucking seconds.
“You know Prez… You’re going to be pretty busy with all your responsibilities soon...”
Brianna taps her stiletto shaped nail to her lips in faux contemplation. Her smarmy expression gives away her true intentions resembling every bit of the evil bitch she is. 
“...Annnnnd it won’t look good for our lovely new president to put herself at risk by getting us drugs, right? Sooooo, I was telling Cho here how I’m going to be the one taking over for you now.”
Brianna coyly tucks a few loose strands of her long tawny locks behind her ear. 
“Who knows? I might be able to get a better discount than you too.”
Passing the blunt back to Choso she winks at him. Choso merely chuckles, shaking his head at the implications before taking another hit.
And yeah that’s what fucking did it alright.
More than ready to give Brianna exactly what the fuck she’d been asking for you wordlessly lunge forward to snatch her up by those raggedy ass microlink extensions she couldn’t stop touching.
However your trajectory is thrown when you feel Choso grab you by your wrist. Pulling you in towards him, the action confused both you and Brianna—who didn’t know how close she was to actually kissing dirt.
Choso passes the joint back to Brianna, telling her to keep it as a ‘sample’ he turns his attention back towards you.
“Come on Prez, I got places to be. Get me my money now before I charge your ass the full stack.”
You both leave Brianna standing there dumbfounded as Choso drags you back into the house. 
Plug!Choso guides you through the crowd of your sisters that are all now much too drunk and self-involved in their own good time to care about the pierced n’ scary dark haired man towing their president behind him. 
Reaching the staircase Choso motions for you to go ahead of him and you nod dumbly as you obediently climb the stairs trying not to trip. 
Urging you along, Choso is right on your tail— quite literally, as he tries to simultaneously avoid staring at your ass cheeks jiggling out from under your skirt—but more importantly tries to keep any other wandering eyes below from getting a peek as well. 
Choso places a hand on your waist, both to keep you from falling and to move you along quicker. Warm tingles radiate out from where his hands touch your bare skin yet he instantly releases you once you reach the top.
You can’t help but to pout at the loss of contact.
“Which one?”
Choso still feels all business though as he walks ahead of you like he can’t wait to wrap this up and get you the fuck out of his life again.
Plug!Choso who you usher into your room before closing the door. The party seems distant as only the faint sounds of the base bumping against the walls reach the sanctuary of your room. Still holding the knob you’re leaning with your back against the doorframe as your body is still pumping insane amounts of adrenaline through you. 
Nearly fighting Brianna, Choso finally touching you, on top of being drunk had your mind going into overdrive especially since it seemed like Choso would leave as soon as the deal was over.
Would he really take the money and go just like that?
Choso’s face is unreadable as he strolls deeper into your room and casually looks around. You had always come over to his place and he would have never in a million years dreamed of being able to see your room in your actual sorority house. 
It was so you though. 
Tidy and adorned in your favorite colors, your walls are decorated with pictures of celebrities, friends and various moodboards. Not to mention it smelled like you. The scent of your sugary perfume with notes of vanilla and saffron assaulted Choso's senses making it seem a bit warmer in the room than it actually was.
“Yo Prez, the money.” 
His patience for the situation is dwindling. He has to get out and fast. 
Choso doesn’t know what he’ll do if he doesn’t leave soon.
Yet you were plotting the exact opposite and you couldn’t let him leave so easily now that you finally had him alone after all this time. 
Armed with a plan you nod as you scoot by him and over to your vanity to retrieve the cash. Acting clueless as to which drawer you put it in, you search them all as you bend over to check one of the drawers at the very bottom. 
Choso swallows hard.
Your ass–with plenty of curves to spare–is on display for him as well as your sheer pink thong that teasingly pokes out between your crystal studded fishnets. 
You had to be doing this on purpose. 
Swishing side to side your skirt raises up a bit higher with every shift of your hips while your thong strains tighter across the print of your fat pussy lips threatening to snap altogether.
Akin to a seductive pendulum as you sway before Choso completely entrancing him. 
Only you could ever affect him in this way.
After what feels like years do you finally locate the money, a sizable stack of cash composed of 20 dollar bills.
“Found it! In the top drawer all along, imagine that!”
Smirking you plop down in your vanity chair crossing your legs not missing how Choso’s gaze lingered, even if just the tiniest moment, on your thighs.
“Took ya long enough…” 
Choso mumbles. There's no real bite to his words this time though. He’s holding his backpack close to hide his half chub while he removes 3 hefty bags of kush from his backpack to toss on the desk beside you.
Reaching for the cash his annoyance is evident on his face when you jerk away from him. Leaning back and fanning the bills across your chest, you wave them tauntingly in the air.
“Stop playin’ around. Not in the fuckin mood, I swear.”
“Playing?”
You question acting coy.
“This is just business right Choso?”
You sat up as if you were taking this seriously at all and Choso is unamused as he reaches for the money again. 
And you snatch it back yet again like a fucking brat. 
“I’m practically dropping a stack on this–thanks to your new “tax” and all. How do I know if it's any good?”
Clearly your plan is working as you continue to push Choso’s buttons pretending you aren’t excited from him towering over you now.
“Cut the games, Prez. Ya know my shit is always pressure.”
You act contemplative as your eyes lazily travel up his tense muscular form appreciating the view after not seeing him for so long.
“Hmmm, do I though?”
Choso scoffs, growing tired of your games. 
That’s all he ever was to you, a game.
“Like I said, just business. Or are you telling me you weren’t going to count the cash to make sure it's all there before you left?”
Damn. Well you got 'em there. 
Choso rubs the back of his neck before letting out a frustrated sigh.
“Tch—let’s make this quick then, Prez.”
Plug!Choso who after grabbing one of the bags of weed off your vanity takes a seat on your bed. He shrugs off his jacket to retrieve a pipe from the inner pocket and impatiently extends his hand hurrying you with a quick beckoning gesture.
“Gimme your grinder.”
Rolling your eyes you haphazardly toss it over to him. However, unbeknownst to you, the top was loose and crumbles of kush spilled out of it and onto your bed when he failed to catch it.
“Nice looking out Cho, great catch.”
Even though the poor throw and loose top had been your fault, the fact he apparently couldn’t wait to fucking leave along with you still pissed with how he flirted with Brianna makes you lash out. 
“You fucking serious right now? I’m always lookin’ out for your ungrateful ass.”
Obnoxiously you huff, crossing your arms and turning your head away from him.
Ungrateful? For what!? 
He hadn’t been ‘looking out’ for the last month, he’d been completely ignoring you! 
“Heh, like I didn't just stop you from turning that gouda chick into actual cheese from the way you went at her?”
You press your lips together firmly to keep from cracking a smile at his play on Brianna’s nickname. You’re honestly still salty he had even been around her at all getting so chummy. He’d always talked about how stupid your sorority sisters were, it didn’t make sense why he let her flirt with him like that.
You’re also mad he didn’t at least let you pop her one good time.
“The bitches name is Brie. You should know, you were ‘oh so concerned’ about saving her number and giving her a discount.”
Choso looks at you like you’re an idiot as he shakes his head. He stops packing the bowl to throw you his phone.
“Whose number?”
Frowning, you already know the passcode so you unlock it right away. 
Sure enough there was no Brie nor Brianna in his contact lists. Not even her number showed up when you searched his phone for it in case it was under a completely different alias. 
He’d never even saved it. 
The smug smirk on Choso’s face tells you he knew what she was doing all along and got you all riled up on purpose.
In fact, Choso had recognized Brianna’s ploy immediately. You had previously mentioned something about an annoying n’ bitchy rival. 
Besides, there was no other plausible reason for a dumb sorority bitch like her to be talking to him at all—much less throwing herself at him so aggressively.
“Doesn’t feel good now does it, Prez?”
Your face is on fire and you turn away from Choso totally humiliated. You had played right into his hands.
“Hmph! Don’t get cocky, I wanted a reason to beat her ass anyway.”
You puff your cheeks into a pout that Choso can’t help but to chuckle at, shaking his head at you again. 
You were a huge brat that's for damn sure.
“Well, it certainly looks like you found one.”
You’re quiet finally as you rake over his words in your mind. 
‘I’ve always been looking out for you.’
Not only did he not save Brianna’s number there’s a high probability he just kept you from being kicked out of the entire sorority and maybe school too. Fighting was a huge no-no and you could have gotten expelled. Apparently jealous with rage you were ready to risk it all at that moment without even thinking of the consequences. 
Fuck.
Choso had in fact still been looking out for you—even when you didn’t deserve it. 
Plug!Choso who accepts your silence is a sign of your defeat and after a few minutes you move from your desk to sit next to him on your bed as he finishes grinding and packing the bowl. 
“Brats get greens this time.”
I’m paying a premium for all this shit, I better get greens. 
But you hold in that thought, not wanting to give him any more lip in the moment as you’re the one left licking your wounds this time.
Like a gentleman Choso holds the bowl for you and lights it as you take a hit. He tries not to notice how well your glossed lips are wrapping around the phallic mouthpiece as searingly thick smoke flows into your lungs. 
Damn, this shit was dank as hell. 
You’re doing your best to hold it in but your lungs are burning as you watch Choso take a hit himself. Not being able to keep in your coughs for a second more you’re left signaling at Choso to ‘wait a sec’ when he holds the pipe out back to you.
Fuck, it was even stronger than what you remembered.
“See Prez? True pressure.”
You shrug at him trying to save face although your eyes are watering, already tinting a bright shade of red.
“Uhh duh, I always cough Choso. I’ll still need a few more hits to know for certain.”
Choso rolls his eyes.
You take another hit—a smaller one this time—before slowly falling back onto your bed.  
Your eyes close as your high settles in and you debate on what to say next without fucking things up even more with your slick ass mouth. 
However your concentration is diminishing quickly as your buzz makes your senses overly aware of Choso’s intense body heat radiating off him, your thighs practically touching. 
The weed swirling together with the alcohol in your system makes you all the more sensitive. Your mind floats away as your gaze is hyper focused on how the lean muscles of Choso’s toned back and broad shoulders ripple under the thin black tee he wears.
God, Choso is so sexy. 
Your legs squeeze together to calm the burning in your core just from the thought. You want nothing more than to drag him down to bed with you and melt into his embrace—but there's an invisible force field around him that you can’t reach. 
You’re almost certain he would recoil from you if you tried now. 
There’s a conversation you needed to have first but you didn’t know how to start it without fucking things up even more. 
The result is an awkward silence that uncomfortably settles in the room as Choso finishes the bowl off himself. 
Never one to smoke too much of his own product he’s only indulging now to temper his mood. 
Choso doesn’t know why he’s still here, all good sense in him telling him to take the money and get the hell out. Yet he knows he’s hoping for something–anything–to show him you’ve changed even though all signs so far tonight have been showing him you haven’t.
You’re still cowering away from any accountability and he is determined not to give you an easy out this time. 
And it’s for that exact reason Choso can’t look over at you right now.
Otherwise he’s sure to see your tiny pink top that had started to roll up exposing the glitter adorned skin of your underboob. Or how your slow exhales cause your soft stomach to dip temptingly showing off the pink crystal belly button ring he gave you. 
The sight of your fishnets brushing against one another out of the corner of his eye alone is enough to know he wouldn’t be able resist grasping onto your supple thighs. God how he would relish the way his fingers would indent into them. He wanted to rip those slutty fishnets right off of you so his head could push your skirt up even further on your hips while he drowned himself in your wet cunt—not even stopping when you would cry from overstimulation.
Plug!Choso, who is thankful his distraction at long last comes in the form of the faded gray blue fabric by your pillow. 
“Yo!..is that my shit?”
Eyes opening wide, you pale upon seeing Choso reach for the crumpled up shirt. Choso unravels the tee to confirm it is in fact his shirt—one of his favorite band tees at that. 
“Oh, is that yours?”
Choso deadpans.
“So you listen to RHCP now?”
“Maybe…” 
You grab it from him and toss it to the side less you break down and confess to him you had slept in it most nights. Not only have you slept in it but you do in fact listen to RHCP now, especially when you workout.
However with this Choso has hit his limit. 
To him you hadn’t changed. 
Could you not even own up to the tiniest of things?
He couldn’t let himself get sucked back into your toxic web, not anymore. The longer he stayed the more likely that was.
“S’all good, Prez. Keep it.”
Choso grabs his jacket.
“Listen, I gotta g–”
“—w-wait!” 
You grab the other end of his jacket. You still find it difficult to find the right words but you had to say something. 
It was now or never.
“W-Wait… ah, at least before you go…l-let me know how Yuji’s game went?”
You meekly ease into the question but see Choso go ridgid at the mention regardless. 
For now he relents and stays seated. Although a few minutes pass before he speaks.
“He won, of course. MVP of the season.”
You smile genuinely at that but Choso isn’t looking at you— too pained by the memories that began to bubble up again like bile in his throat.
“Awe, that's so great! I knew he would! I’m so happy for him.”
Choso grits his teeth as he turns back to you, his anger evident in his entire being as every muscle in him flexes.
“Are you? So that’s how you treat someone you’re happy for? Really?!”
He doesn’t give you the chance to respond.
“Yuji’s a strong kid— much stronger than me. Honestly, I didn’t even think he minded you weren’t there as he was all focus and excitement to play that day—”
You let out a quiet exhale in relief though any consolation you felt was instantly shattered as Choso continued. 
“But when I put him to bed that night. H-He..He’d asked why you weren’t there…He asked if you were gone now like our parents. Yuji wouldn’t believe you’d miss it otherwise.”
Choso struggles to say the last bit and maintain eye contact with you. 
Every moment you gaze into his eyes though was pure torture as you’re racked with even more guilt.
“Choso I–”
“I’m so fuckin’ tired of all your fuckin’ excuses!”
You’re silent. It’s so strange to see him this upset you don’t know what to say.
“I’d ask you if you’d even considered the abandonment issues that kid already carries but you don’t. You don’t fill that fuckin’ superficial lil’ head of yours with anything beyond yourself!”
Finishing what he had to say, Choso gathers up his jacket and backpack, stuffing it full with the stack of cash on the vanity—not even bothering to count it.
Momentarily dumbfounded, you're scrambling from the bed to block his path. 
“C-Come on, Choso! I didn’t want to abandon him or you! I tried to call you and I texted you so much these past few weeks to talk!”
Choso isn’t impressed.
“And not one text actually had the words ‘I’m sorry’ in it. Not that it would have cut it this time.”
You're reduced to silence for the umpteenth time tonight. 
You wreck your brain knowing most of your texts had been focused on baiting him to respond to you but fuck—did you really not even apologize? 
“But I am sorry!”
Choso’s gaze is cold and distant, so foreign in comparison to the warmth you’d taken for granted before.
“Whatever you say, Prez.”
There it is again. You’ve grown to resent the title, the job, everything about it.
“Just stop calling me that, okay?!”
You’re trying hard to fight back the tears that threateningly pool in the corners of your eyes.
“What...Prez? Why, it aint all that they cracked it up to be?”
“N-No… it’s n-not… I actually hate it and I hate being here.”
Your voice is hardly above a whisper as you direct your words towards the ground. You didn't want Choso to see your glassy eyes even if he’d noticed the cracks in your voice. 
Plug!Choso who regards you with skepticism but curiosity nonetheless. So at long last you decided to be honest with both him and yourself aloud for the first time.
But it didn’t mean shit if you wouldn’t do something about it.
“Then quit.”
Choso says to you like it’s the most obvious answer in the world as your head snaps up incredulously.
“H-huh? W-What?!”
“You heard me princess— quit.”
Could you really just quit? 
Truthfully, you had never considered it an option. The expectations put on you by your sorority sisters, your parents and the plans you had made for yourself had all led you to the commitments and responsibilities you had now. 
How could you just let them all down by walking away from it all?  
“Choso— I heard you..b-but I can’t, you don’t understand I–”
“—No, I understand better than you do, princess. You spent so much time with me and Yuji because you hate this sorority bullshit, you can’t stand any of these bitches and now you just agreed to be president of your own goddamn misery!”
Reading you for filth, Choso stares at you expectantly but you avoid his gaze.
Your nails suddenly becoming all the more interesting as you fumble with them.  
“–Ight then.”
Choso doesn’t want to argue with you any longer. 
You’re still full of excuses to his disappointment. If you wanted to be something you weren't that badly, then that was your own prerogative he decided as he brushed past you.
“N-No! P-Please, don’t leave Cho!”
There's clear desperation in your voice. You cling to him, burying your head into the middle of his back as your shaky hands weave their way around his midsection. 
Choso is mid-twist on the doorknob. 
He had all intentions of leaving if you still weren't being honest with yourself about things.
Still does. 
Yet his determination is wavering from your hot tears begin to seep through his shirt and trickle down his spine. The warmth of your body—now flattened against his—causes your pert nipples to poke into his back while your delicate fingers wretchedly grasp onto his taunt abs like a lifeline. 
Like you actually needed him in your life.
Fucking hell, you didn’t play fair at all.
But he couldn’t forgive you just to hurt him again and especially not Yuji.
“Let go.”
“No.”
“I said let go!”
“NO!”
Choso easily pries you off of him, spinning you around as your back slams against the door pinning you in place. His hands encircle your arms and extend out fully so he could put some distance between the two of you. 
He couldn’t think straight when you were all over him. 
Your world is a blur and in your crossfaded state you are left with vertigo at the sudden shift of positions. Both you and Choso are left panting at the intensity of it all.
“You don’t listen to anyone do you?! You just do whatever the fuck you want…”
Choso’s face is red with anger and your eyes—already reddened from your high—take on a deeper shade as you are now openly bawling in front of him.
“Tch, why are you the one crying? This is how you want things, right?!”
You shake your head, unable to communicate beyond your pitiful sobs. 
Choso grows more and more frustrated as the guilt he is feeling battles with his more rational mind prompting him to still be angry with you despite your tears. Back and forth his mind races until it all bubbles over and—
“—You don’t think I know I’m not good enough for you!?”
Your teary eyes widen at the sudden admission. 
Choso even startles himself with his own confession he’d been holding in all this time. 
“But not Yuji...He’s already so much better than me! He’s gonna actually be something one day. He doesn’t deserve to be treated like that.”
Your lip quivers and your pleas are almost unintelligible.
“I-I know…m’s-sorry…m-m’so sorry C-Choso!”
Choso exhales deeply and shoulders slump forward as he releases you, running a hand over his face and back through his raven locks.
You couldn't read his expression but you didn't want him to attempt to leave you again as you close the gap between you, arms encircling him once more.
Choso doesn’t push you away, yet to his credit he doesn't return your embrace either as he’s still torn.
“I-I missed y-you so m-much.”
Cursing the hold you have over him Choso can’t deny he still wants to be with you—but you both were at an impasse.
Nothing good would come from repeating the same cycle again. 
There is no resolution if you still want to keep up a front. 
“P-Please forgive me Cho—I-I love you.”
The sweet proclamation is accentuated by your pillowy lips spreading kisses over his chest while the tips of your fingers slip up his shirt to place feather light scratches at the small of his back. 
Love, eh?
An unexpected revelation dawns on Choso and he is now resolved in what he has to do. 
“Yeah princess, you really love me?” 
Oblivious to the danger edging in his voice, you nod as you continue to coo affectionate words and affirmations into his chest. One of your legs hitches around his as you mold yourself deeper into him thinking he’d finally forgiven you. 
Had he forgiven you though? 
Well, not exactly. 
A devious smirk appears across Choso’s features.
Choso had come to the conclusion that at the end of the day you were simply a terrible people pleaser. 
Your stuck up bratty nature was merely a front of false confidence. 
You tried so hard to become whatever anyone else wanted you to be, you'd lie to yourself and become utterly miserable in your efforts to appease those around you. 
However, Choso knew the version of you he’d gotten when you’d been with him and Yuji had been the real you. 
And he actually did believe you loved him— even if you had just forced yourself to say it in the moment so you could manipulate him into staying.
Sympathetic to your pitiful nature, Choso wouldn’t just abandon you. 
But if you couldn’t do what was best for you, he would make sure you would himself.
PART 3
⋙ ©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.
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⋙ I'm about halfway through P3, its 5.5k already lol. stick with me though cause pt 3 is the nasty brat taming smut we all are waiting for! if i tagged you here i will tag you again for p3 but im still adding new people to tag list so lmk in comments or reblogs if you'd like to be added. trying to focus to finish this but my adhd might distract me into writing a quick gojo fic but if i do i will finish this right after!
⋙tags: (ps ty for all the sweet comments for those who joined my overall writing tag list yall legit had me in tears ilysm!) @nkogneatho @toji-girl-main @RoyaltyAndRoses @aydene @slowlyshycomputer @bontensbabygirl @yoonjinhusbands @anxious-chick @kashxyou @halosdiary @littlemochabunni @ryomens-vixen @buttercupblu @tonycries @lowkeyremi @strawberrygirl0 @crybaby-herbalist @rintcrous @bomboclakkk @anubisisthebomb @alwaysfreakingout @oeanonyme @chrys23 @spltbtch @uranometrias @officialsimpp @crispycatt @purple-obsidian my-jukebox @peachyharts111 @thedorklingqueen @sugurusprettygirl @scarasw1f3 @kgorethz @c1truswh4re @madaqueue
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