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squishneedsahero · 4 years ago

Text

Self Discovery

It’s Who I Am

Part 2

Description: How would The Falcon and The Winter Soldier have played out if you, the younger daughter of Howard Stark got involved? You had been kidnapped by HYDRA at a young age, your mind taken from you as they forced you to work towards creating new weapons for them and when HYDRA had fallen you had gotten free with your scattered memories for you to slowly piece together.

Word Count: 2715

It's a little over an hour later when the three of you reach the airport and board the military plane which had dropped Sam and Bucky at the warehouse. Joaquin is more than a little surprised that you of all people had just happened to be there and had joined their group. You take a seat and lean back with your eyes closed. At this point your cracked rib isn't hurting any more, which you should probably look into as theres a good chance you could also be enhanced thanks to your time with HYDRA, but theres also a good chance you have a really high pain tolerance thanks to HYDRA.

You take off your shirt, leaving you sitting in your leggings and sports bra as you decide to work on the technology in your shirt. You had used Tony's nano technology to create the shirt, and leggings, so they were smart and it was just a matter of programming them to do exactly what you wanted. Right now you wanted to make it so they would absorb most of the shock from any time you got hit, because dealing with super soldiers who you didn't want to kill was just a bit different from aliens you could use brute force on.

Sam and Bucky's talking pulls you out of your thoughts and you look up at them. They begin to argue about something so you go back to your thoughts, preferring those to the sound of their voices. You had found that you were quite good at getting lost in your thoughts, hiding from the world and it's problems in the relative safety of your own mind. You knew very well it was a trauma response, disassociating and blocking everything around you out. It might not be the healthiest thing but considering everything you had been through and the many ways you could respond to that trauma you'd take this response.

You had been working on all of this stuff with yourself since you had basically refused to see a therapist. You knew you should talk to someone but the settings you had seen that they offered therapy made you want to just shut down worse than you simply keeping to yourself with all of this. Before you know it you have already fixed the problems with your suit, gotten the nano bots set to better protect you in a fight.

Once the suit is finished you look up and come back to reality, and realize that the plane is landing. As you zone back in Sam notices and asks, "you good, y/n?"

You blink before focusing on him, "yeah, I'm good," its a lie but for some reason you don't want Sam to worry about you.

He laughs gently and shakes his head, "thats a lie, but we don't have to talk about it. It's not my business anyways, I was just checking."

This causes you to pause for a moment, normally people would continue pushing you for answers, "alright," it comes out almost as a question but the conversation ends there since the plane touches down at that moment.

Baltimore, you recognize the city as Baltimore. You follow Sam who is following Bucky, who is leading the way somewhere in the streets of Baltimore. Sam pauses for a moment to talk to some kid and you gently wave a hello before you all continue on your way. The three of you walk up to a house where Bucky knocks on the door and a kid answers only to say the person Bucky is looking for doesn't live there.

"Tell him the guy from the bar in Goyang is here." That gets the kid to listen and he closes the door as he goes to tell Isaiah who is wanting to see him. It's a moment later when the door opens again and the kid lets you all in.

You barely make it into the room, and see Isaiah when you begin feeling sick to your stomach. You know him. You had done something to him during your time with HYDRA and whatever that something was it was bad enough that the sight of the man in front of you made you feel sick. From the look on his face he recognizes you as well.

Isaiah gives you a sour look and you point towards the door, tears beginning to form in your eyes, "I'm- I'm gonna go," you look down and your hands are shaking. You look back and forth between Isaiah and the door a few times in the space of five seconds, "I'm sorry-" you say quickly to Isaiah before running out the door.

You make it to a tree in the yard where you catch yourself and take a pause to regain your bearings. You're about to hurl, but you're able to hold it back as you let yourself collapse to the ground, leaning against the tree as the tears flow down your cheeks. You grab your head and begin taking deep breaths. You didn't know what you had done to Isaiah but you knew you regretted all of it, that you had been forced to do it, just like every other horrible thing which you had done.

You get a hold of yourself after a few minutes and then sam and Bucky come rushing out the door, they walk past you Sam loudly asking why Bucky hadn't mentioned the fact that there has been a black super soldier for decades. You stand up and once again you're suddenly shaken back to reality as a police siren goes off nearby. It's as though the sound resets you, something that felt familiar as all of your physical reactions to seeing Isaiah disappeared. You stood up straight and made your way over to Sam and Bucky where a cop was asking if Sam was bothering Bucky.

"No. Do you know who this is?" Bucky asks sounding a bit angry with the cops for deciding to pull this shit. You can see the realization come to the cop's eyes as the other whispers in his ear, the regret and embarrassment clear on his face.

"Mr.Wilson, I'm sorry- I didn't recognize you without the goggles." With that he rushes back to the car where they end up finding out that Bucky has a warrant out for his arrest since he'd ditched a state mandated therapy session.

The police take Bucky away, leaving you and Sam in the street. It's once things calm down that Sam turns to you and asks once again, "are you alright? You ran out of there pretty fast."

You pause for a moment, looking at him before answering, "I'm... as alright as I can be." There is another pause as you try to shove back the vague memories that were now remerging due to the immediate threat of the cops is gone. You swallow deeply then shake your head a little before beginning to walk down the street, figuring you might as well get walking if he's going to bug you about this. "It's easier to not talk about it."

Sam is quiet for a bit, simply walking beside you for a while before saying, "look y/n, that might work for now but eventually it isn't going to work anymore. I know you don't know me and I don't know you but, I'm willing to help you. It's just a matter of if you want it, but for now let's just go get Bucky out of prison."

Something about that causes you to pause, and you look at him as the both of you walk. It's a few moments before you decide to speak, "thanks." You walk in silence from there, considering what he had said, of all the people offering to help he seemed the most genuine, your gut told you that you could trust the man next to you. Your thoughts on this topic cause you to frequently glance over at him even if you didn't notice this fact.

Sam on the other hand does notice your frequent looks, but decides to stay quiet, feeling he had already pushed you enough for the short time you'd known each other. Having a quiet moment though as the both of you make your way to the police station he does find himself stealing his own glances at you, not in a crude way. Sam had practically never been around you up to this point and he'd been distracted all day, this was the first quiet moment there had been between just the two of you all day. He had noticed that your eyes are the color they are, or the curve of your nose and how it complimented the rest of your face so well. It was a known stereotype that you were attractive, you were a Stark you had to be attractive, but Sam hadn't taken the time to actually notice this before this and now that he had noticed he wasn't sure if he could forget it.

The pair of you make it to the police station and take some seats it the lobby area, after talking with the officers at the front desk to ask about conditions for Bucky's release. They don't give either of you any answers, leaving you to wait instead. Eventually a woman walks in and up to the both of you, introducing herself as Bucky's therapist.

As she does this Bucky is walked out the double doors, "thanks for getting him out."

"It wasn't me," the woman responds as none other than John Walker comes in, flaunting himself as he does so.

You can't stop the groan of annoyance that leaves your body as you see him and the woman says she has worked with him before.

Once Bucky is out the therapist walks over to him, "condition of your release session now, you too Sam- y/n you're fine to wait."

This tells Sam that it isn't an option for him to say no so he follows, leaving you with John who had said he wants to talk with all of you as soon as they're done. You grab your phone, and walk out to wait in the parking lot for Sam and Bucky rather than having to stand by John and Lemar while you wait and just for good measure you decide to take a moment and call Pepper to give her an update on what it is you're doing.

"Hello, y/n," Pepper answers the phone, "you alright?"

"Hey Pepper, I'm good, thanks. I'm going to be gone for a while, not sure how long but I found something to do and it seems like it might help me find some sort of purpose. I just didn't want you to worry."

"Thanks for letting me know, and good luck y/n," Pepper responds. Pepper had been trying to help you since Tony had died, Morgan was the only real family you had left even if you didn't remember any of them anyways. But making sure you at least had a chance at a life you'd want was the least she could do for you since your brother had sacrificed himself to give everyone that chance.

You had officially been declared dead when you were only 13 years old, it was because of this that you hadn't been included in your father's will. Then with your sudden coming back with the blip and Tony's unexpected death you hadn't been included in his either. This left you with nothing to your name, and to be frank you were okay with that, you didn't see the need for material items. There were so many other things you needed to do with your life that worrying about an inheritance was no where on your list. It was all too important to you to not let anyone down, you needed to re-learn how to be yourself. Be who you had been before HYDRA and all of that had happened. Thats what everyone wanted from you they kept telling you stories about yourself and how you had been when you were younger, how you had dressed, walked talked and acted. You just couldn't bring yourself to want to let anyone down by not being that person any more.

This was why Pepper took care of you almost like another child, you had nothing to your name and no memories of your life before HYDRA. You were relying solely on other people's word that you were who they say you are.

"Thanks Pepper, I'll be home soon, bye."

"Goodbye y/n," then theres a click as Pepper hangs up.

When Pepper hangs up you don't remove the phone from your ear, instead turning to see if John and Lemar had followed you out of the police station. They hadn't so you put your phone in your pocket, and move to lean up against the building while continuing to wait for Sam and Bucky. It's as you take a deep breath to relax for a moment that the door opens and you hear a voice that is already annoyingly familiar, "hey, y/n," John greets you.

You bite off a sarcastic remark and decide to instead say, "hey Josh."

You can hear him struggle to not correct you and then say, "look, we got off on the wrong foot, let's start over, I'm John Walker, Captain America," and he holds his hand out to shake your hand.

You raise an eyebrow slightly as you look at his hand, "yeah," you pause for a moment, "it's not happening John. You introducing yourself isn't going to change my gut feeling about you and honestly I'm sorry because as far as I can tell you haven't given me a reason to not like you, I just don't and you're going to have to deal with that fact." Once again you were blunt with him, you really didn't see a reason to dislike the guy but you did and until he gave you a reason to like him you were going to stick with your gut to be safe.

Relief. That is what you feel only moments after you finish talking to John as you see Sam and Bucky exit the building. John notices too and decides to get their attention by setting off the siren of the cop car you were standing next too.

Once again the sound causes your mind to feel as though it has reset. A sudden calm sets over you, but it's not a peaceful calm, it's a terrifying calm. A calm before the storm though what the storm was you had not a clue.

By the time you come back, and zone back in to reality, Sam and Bucky are standing next to you and talking with John. John is trying to convince Sam and Bucky once again that all of you should work together. Bucky flat out rejects this. Sam on the other hand offers a reason as to why it is easier for you to not work together, and it is actually logical.

John on the other hand does not appreciate Sam's calm and logical reasoning. "Well, if you won't work with me then stay the hell out of my way."

You give him a double take, like are you serious John? Didn't he just say that he wanted to try and start over so that you liked him? Welp, now your gut feeling at least makes sense and you don't have to feel bad for disliking him for no reason.

You follow Sam and Bucky as they walk away, "we don't have any leads, so I say we bet on someone who has a better hand than we do."

There is a moment of silence before Sam says, "no, we aren't going to see Zemo."

Of course Bucky brings up good points and in the end convinces Sam that going to visit Zemo is a good idea. You of course only have a vague idea of who Zemo is and know he is nothing but trouble so you're just going to trust them on this, and your gut was telling you that you could trust them on this. You instinct hadn't lead you wrong yet so you were going to continue following it until it proved otherwise.

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jrueships · 4 years ago

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What wips do you have rn 👀 elaborate pspspspsp

Too many wips.. thats what I have rn.. too many...

WJBFJEBF so the ones I'm most focusing on rn is the spiderman! Donovan/royce au!! So far I wrote the whole exposition and I'm working on the 'enticing incident' LMFAO it's upgraded from my last summary so I have more to write because I'm insane but yeah! It's the one I want done the most but I'm also gonna go on a trip with my buds to this place without wifi for like? Four days so 😭 I might have to finish it there and wait forever until I can post it! And I'm still unsure about the ending!!! THE STRUGGLE

a shorter fic I have in mind still is the russell waiting for kd at a table for two but he never shows up fic! I just really like writing russell widjsbf but not much action happens there! Many just dialogue and a lot of pg fashion/life roasting from Russell's inner dialogue. He's very judgemental of people who give off douchebag frat bro vibes but can't help but feel intrigued by them JABFJWB oh and he makes fun of pg simping for gold diggers

The fics I have written partly but put back in the burner are my donovan/jaylen fic, marcus/giannis, pg/kawhi jealousy fic, pg/kawhi sm*t fic, pg/kawhi space au, and john/trae patroclus and Achilles au! Mainly because they're super long and I get nervous about writing them too much and wasting all my muse on one thing, so I get scared and back off 😭 but I'll tell u the basic summary of them!!

💙 donovan/jaylen fic is based off the idea of donovan going grocery shopping and getting all mad at the thought of the clippers LMFAO. Basically he's at a grocery store getting flowers for his sports medicine doctor for always putting up with his bullshit (never wanting to sit down and relax so he can actually heal. Playing through the pain). But as he shops, he keeps finding the simplest shit that reminds him of the clippers. Like he sees a claw machine and thinks about Kawhi and how collected that guy is, just chillin in the upper stands, while his team is facing a possible defeat. Donny gets all frustrated because like?? He can't just do that? Just sit back and chill while his team is playing without him? Donny HAS to help, has to GET OUT THERE!! kawhi Doesn't... but kawhi is the one who won a championship. And donovan starts doubting his leadership skills and if he's really good for his team.. if he let them down by being Too pushy and Too in their faces.

+ and then when he's getting a cute card to go with the flowers, he spots one that says "you're the man!!" And he thinks about terance Mann and his great game against them, how proud pg, basically his mentor, was of him. And it makes donovan think about his loss and how he couldn't get that same pride out of Dwyane Wade.

Overall, everything makes him feel useless af and he almost kicks a shelf out of anger. But he calms himself down and goes back to the flowers because he actually only got this little dinky green plant still struggling to bloom? He got it for himself because he felt bad for it LMAO but he still needs to get flowers for his sports medicine doctor. He's goes back to the flower section and who does he see? JAYLEN BROWN all gussied up in his depression fit LMFAO.. but they both are. Jaylen and him try to joke but they're both tired and awkward so it sucks IABDKSBD they basically just ask what the other is doing there. Jaylen is just traveling rn because he got nothin else to do IWBDKS but he bought Deuce a souvenir gift! And he asks Donovan if he can help him put it in his trunk (but really he doesn't need donovan's help. He can pick the toy up himself. He just knows that Donovan is too stubborn to accept help when he needs it but he'll always try helping others out! So he wants donny to think he's helping jaylen but in reality jaylen is trying to help HIm because at the car he invites Donovan to go meet up at a hotel with him where they kiss and have sad *** to make themselves feel better WKBFKSBX) that's basically it!!!! I have literally everything written but the *** scene they're literally my weakness.. I love the emotions they make but I hate.. describing the actions it takes to make them?? Idk I just feel cheesy writing it? It's very tedious and boring to actually crank my brain for a synonym to 'moan' because I'm tired of using that word but it's the only word that really applies to that situation without sounding weird, yknow?? Just very tedious

💙💙💙 OK so marcus/giannis idk bro like... it's just taking so long IWBKENF idk what to say except giannis makes a ton of small jokes at marcus

💙💙 OK so pg/kawhi jealousy fic... BASICALLY the plot is LeBron hosts some big rich guy party for the NBA because I need a reason to write all these people that live far apart interacting together OKAY??? But anyways it takes place after 2020 lakers winning the championship! Pg convince the clippers to come or else they'll look bad for being the only team not coming and they media will have a field day with them, so the clippers join the party. Basically everyone who later team up in 2021 are talking to eachother LMFAO like James hardon+kyrie+kd are talking while russell westbrook and beal are bonding over dance moves with a jealous John wall pouting in the corner. Obligatory Marcus and giannis interactions because I can. Kyle and demar are laughing together. It's all goood until LeBron waltzes over with his weird ass feet and starts talking to kawhi. Hes being all Handsome and Strong and lowkey flexing his win. Its starting to make pg suspicious so he keeps intruding upon the conversation. His inner dialogue is basically a ton of lebron hate KABFKWB. LeBron sometimes comments back to pg but ends up kinda tuning him outta the conversation and sly dissing him to kawhi like "how does it feel talking to someone who doesn't hit the side of the backboard lol"

Pg is starting to get nervous because he's trying to compete against LEBRON over who's the better teammate for kawhi.. and with his current playoff history.. he's not gonna win. He keeps trying to get kawhi out of the conversation, but lebron keeps drawing him back in and pg ends up giving up or he risks looking like an overbearing girlfriend.. So he slinks off in hopes of distracting himself. Originally, pg thought KAWHI would be the one standing all alone awkwardly in the room with no one to talk to, but it's slowly becoming HIM who's the lonely one LMFAO. He tries joining in bradley and Russ's conversation because HEY!! Everybody leaves russ! Russ must be SUUUPER lonely and DESPERATE for someone to talk to him‼ especially when his old ex durant is out there plotting with his two hydra heads!! paul thought, anyways, but finds out russ is actually having the time of his life clowning around with beal !! That just makes pg even more envious and he walks away with zero satisfaction of feeling superior JABDJSB he tries talking to John wall like "this party fuckin sucks bro" but John kinda barks at him and pg gives up. He tries talking to marcus and giannis but that was a mistake because the two smartiest smartasses in the room start roasting him together so he's shunned back to pretending like he's getting 700 thirsty women in his dms, AKA pretending like he got a text on his phone while he leans alone on a wall LMFAO. After glancing up periodically (and casually) to see if kawhi is still talking to lebron, he later gives up on playing popular and goes to hide in the bathroom like a fucking loser WHDJBFJEBD in summary he kinda broods and steams about how much he hates lebron and how he's 'so much better than him' and he's just thinking of petty insults against him to try and convince the kawhi in his mind not to leave him for lebron. He gets really mad and punches a mirror, but thank God lebron is playing bass boosted music so no one at the party hears it.

But, demar ends up knocking on the door. He needs to shit. So pg is like.. what do I do with this broken mirror and my bleeding hand.. so he tries to keep demar out and they banter and eventually demar notices its kinda weird for pg to be huddled up in the bathroom instead of partying.. he must be getting high or smthin. So he's like "that's fucking stupid. He can go get high in one of lebrons 700 rooms. Why The bathroom." So he just opens the door LANKDN and sees The Scene.

At first he's like "are u paying for that.." to which pg responds with "uhhh. I tripped and hit my head on it" (while clutching a bleeding fist) but then he realizes OHHH pg must be ... OH is he.. no.. he can't be limp wristed... blah blah they end up bonding over their funny situations: demar being jealous of kawhi and feeling like kyle thinks he sucks because of him. Pg being jealous of lebron and feeling like kawhi thinks he sucks because of him. Blah blah it's a bittersweet ending pg becomes a little less of a jerk blah blah I haven't finished it because I'm stupid and WEAK

💙💙💙💙 pg/kawhi space au is just too long I have to be in the mood to write it or I end up dismissing good details I could have included if i wasn't in such a burnt out mind!

💙💙💙 pg/kawhi sm*t fic I gotta be in the mood to detail the h*rny right 😭😭

💙💙💙 john/trae patroclus and Achilles is mainly just an idea but with no plot!

But yeah!!! Those are SOME of my wips!! This post is really long tho so I'll just shout out those!!!@ thank u for the interest tho that's so cute 😭😭😭 it helps me write more when I have a plot lined up to look off of and remember ideas so this is really helpful to me too!!! I'll be shocked if u read this far tbh!! But anyways THANK U ALWAYS FOR THE ASKS, ANON!!!!!

#ted asks #this one is so long #ted drabbles

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anythingandeverything1d · 5 years ago

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Cashmere Vanilla

Your POV:

Your head was pounding, the light streaming in from the curtains was painful, and the room honestly felt like it was spinning. Ughhh.. you pulled the comforter up over your head and took a few deep breaths. I am never going back to the club again, never taking another shot, and never staying out past midnight ever again you thought to yourself. Last night was a bit of a blur...actually the past few weeks were all a little blurry. You had spent almost every night out clubbing, drinking your broken heart away, and dancing with every hot single guy you could find. None of them made it back to your place though..none of them were as good as him...No (y/n) not today. You are not doing this today. Not again. You managed to get out of bed and wander to the bathroom to find some Advil, after rummaging through every cabinet you finally found it, popped a couple in your mouth and downed it with water. Food..I need food, you thought. You looked in the mirror and shuddered, Yikes, I look absolutely terrible. Your makeup had smeared down your face, your hair was in tangles, and the bags under your eyes were growing larger every day. “(y/n)?” your friends voice echoed into the room.

You wandered down the stairs and found her sitting at your table with a bag of bagels and a coffee. “Ah I love you so much” you said grabbing the coffee and bagel with a smile.

“You look horrible.” She stated with an eye roll. “Who did you meet last night?”

“Preston. I think he may actually be a keeper you know. Very cute. Very good at dancing as well.”

“(y/n) you can't keep doing this...” your friend said with a sigh. You dropped your head and moaned. “I think you might actually need to talk to someone. Maybe get some help with the break up...Maybe even call Ha-”

“Don’t say his name.” Your eyes were already starting to fill with tears.

“Look I love you. But this isn't healthy. Its time to get out again. Time to clean up and get back to normal life.” Normal life, what's that...your mind began to wander and stopped listening to the rant about happiness and life your friend was giving you. “(y/n)!” your friend yelled snapping you out of your thoughts. She sighed again and gave you the look. You know the one that said pay attention and lets get moving. “Go shower. Get cleaned up. We are going out. Not to the clubs but to the grocery store where we will get you actual food and then come back and actually cook and clean.” you nodded and gave in. There was nothing stopping a plan she had already mentally envisioned you doing so might as well not argue it. You finished your coffee and hopped in the shower. Taking time to actually shampoo, condition, and yes shave. You walked out a entirely different person. You threw on some leggings and a crop top before brushing out your hair and applying some basic make up. You then made your way back downstairs. “Wow. Its like your completely normal again.” your friend looked. You smiled and spun in a circle.

“Is this socially acceptable now?” She rolled her eyes and dragged you to the car. You felt good, much better than you had in the last two weeks. Maybe this is all I needed...a shower, some clothes, a little makeup..you smiled and laughed for the first time in what felt like forever.

“What are you laughing at” your friend said laughing along.

“I don't know I just feel good today. Like something good is going to happen today.”

“Yeah we are turning you into a normal person again.” You arrived at the store and jumped out grabbing a nearby cart.

“Transform me.” you said with a jump and a laugh. She rolled her eyes and pulled you along. In the store you grabbed your normal groceries along with some special items for a girls night. Face masks, brownie mix, wine, and now were just wandering. You came to the candle isle and smiled. A candle would be nice to have. You smelled over 30 candles before coming to one. Cashmere vanilla. Sounds good, you pulled the top of and took a sniff. Your heart nearly stopped. It was his smell. The almost exact smell of the cologne you had bought him for Christmas. The one he wore all the time, to every event, movie, concert. You dropped to the floor, leaning back against the wall the candle in your hand and tears in your eyes. It was the smell you loved so much. The one you would steal his hoodies for, burry your face in his chest. You closed your eyes.

“(y/n)?” your friend called out very concerned. “What happened? Are you okay?” She knelt next to you.

“Its him. Its his smell.” you mumbled through the tears. You looked at her and held the candle up. “Its all him.” She grabbed it and smelled it before placing it back on the shelf.

“Come o-”

“What are you doing?!” you nearly scream jumping up and pulling it back off the shelf.

“(y/n)...”

“I need it.” you whisper. She just sighs and takes the candle, placing it in the cart and pulling you to the check out. Once in the car you feel like you can breathe again. You're feeling a little better. “Can we stop at Beachwood cafe pleaseeee” you ask turning to your friend with a smile. “I am desperately in need of some coffee.”

“Why Beachwood hmm? Why not Starbucks, or literally anything else?”

“Because...because well”

“(y/n)...you can't keep this up. You can't go back to these things. I need you to actually move on. I can set you up with a blind date, a friend, anything but this needs to stop.”

“I just want a coffee. Theres nothing attached to it. I don't even think about Harry when I think of Beachwood cafe...” you lied biting your tongue. “See I even said his name. Thats an improvement.” You fought the urge to cry. Every little thought about him hurt and Beachwood held so many memories. You and Harry had gone there almost everyday. He would write and you would watch giving him feedback when necessary. He would hold your hand, play with your hair, smile. You would laugh and throw crumbs of the muffin you were eating at him distracting him and then there was that time he had kissed you after blabbing how you were in love with him...stop (y/n) this is enough. No more thoughts. You shook yourself out of it and looked over. “I promise I'll run in and out. Super quick. No tears. Nothing. Just coffee.” She groaned and turned down the road it was on. “Have I told you much I love you?”

“Not enough clearly.” she said before parking and then locking the door. You looked over confused. “In and out. No Harry. No tears. Just coffee.” You bit your lip and nodded. “Just coffee.” and with that you hopped out and ran inside. The familiar smell hit you and you took a deep breath. I can do this. Its just a cafe...nothing attached to it. You looked around and actually smiled. You had missed this place. It left a warm feeling in your heart. Until you heard his voice..his laugh.. you tried not to look but you did. There he was. Sat at your table...with another girl.

“Can I help you?” the barista asked.

“Uh...Yeah can I get-” You heard his laugh again and peaked as he was leaning closer to her. “Nevermind...no thank you.” “Are you sure? I can recommend a drink if you don't know what you want” “No really its okay.” You turned quickly and right into the guy behind you who had dropped his cup of coffee. Everyone went silent and looked. Harry’s head turned and his eyes caught on yours, his mouth dropping open. He went to stand up and you bolted to the door, tears falling down your cheeks. You jumped into the car, wiped your face, and told your friend to drive. She didn't even question it. Didn't question why you had no coffee, why you were crying. She just drove. So much for feeling good today... You ran inside to the comfort of your bed. Your friend had put the groceries away before coming up.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“It was our table....there was another girl...he was laughing. He was happy...and it wasn't because of me..”

She didn't even reply, just crawled into bed with the donuts she had bought and turned on Netflix. The two of you sat like that most of the day and when you felt better you agreed to go down and make brownies. It was then you noticed the candle. She grabbed it and hid it but you got it back. You grabbed the lighter, sat it on the table and lit the wick. You breathed in the smell. It actually calmed you down, just like the real thing had so many times. You turned and smiled at her. “I call licking the spoon.”

Once the brownies were in the oven you had decided to do some laundry. You were upstairs when someone had knocked on the door. “Can you get that?” You yelled downstairs. You didn't hear an answer but the knocking had stopped so you assumed your friend had answered it.

Harry’s POV:

“Yeah the new album is very personal and-” the sound of a frustrated man who had dropped his coffee echoed through the cafe. Everyone went silent and he looked up to see what had happened. There she was, in a chaotic mix of coffee filled drama. Her eyes landed on his and his breath caught in his throat. He moved to get up, see if she was okay. He wanted to wipe the tears in her eyes and hold onto her until she felt better. But she ran, he got up to follow but it was too late. She had jumped in the car and left. His heart broke a little more and he wanted to follow, but the interviewer had also followed, asking if everything was okay. “Yeah just wanted to see if she was okay..” he had lied. He was not okay. He hadn't been. Two weeks ago, after drinking too much and stressing about tour, he had broken up with (y/n). He just thought life would be easier without her, he thought it would help her stay away from the online hate, the record label had said its better to be single, better to have that image of not being tied down. But fuck..life had been far worse without her. He missed her laugh, the way she clung to him on the couch while watching movies, her kisses, everything. And it was then he had made the decision to find her and ask if she was okay, catch up, be friends, anything to have her back in his life. “I’m sorry. I’m not feeling well. Can we reschedule this interview?” the girl nodded, she had been flirting the whole time and she was pretty but she was no (y/n). He ran to the counter and ordered a coffee to go, just the way you liked it.

Your POV:

“Just go away.” you heard your friend say. Weird, who's at the door she's telling to leave. You wandered down the stairs to the door and stopped dead. His green eyes locked on yours and he half smiled. You gripped the wall and stared back.

“(y/n)” he breathed out.

“Harry can't you see you're killing her...I mean what are you even doing here.”

“I brought you a coffee but its a little cold now..and wanted to check in and see if you were okay. You know after the cafe...” he looked down and shifted uncomfortably. “I- I uh missed you and -”

“Harry leave. Seriously. Its been two weeks. She has barely slept, eaten, moved, all because of you. You have destroyed her.” Harrys eyes were glistening with tears and he looked back at you. You just wanted to reach out, hold him, make sure he was okay.

“Stop.” You said to your friend. “Just stop okay.”

“(y/n)” she said exhausted. “You have borderline become an alcoholic who goes out every night to find random guys to distract yourself with. You can't even lie and say you've been okay.” Harry looked at you again and anger flashed through his eyes. This time you looked down. “Harry just please go...”

“No.” you said walking forward. You looked at your friend and back at Harry. “I need to talk to him. I need to know why. I need closure..” She looked annoyed and you knew it was out of love. “Please just take a walk and Harry can have 10 minutes and then he's gone. For good. I just need to know.”

Harry looked stressed and relieved at the same time. She nodded and walked out the door knocking Harry’s shoulder with hers. “10 minutes.”

Harry sighed and walked in. He looked around and noticed the mess but didn’t comment. He followed you to the couch where you sat at one end legs tucked up and arms around your legs. Your head rested on your arms and you looked at him closer. He looks terrible too. His eyes are a little puffy, bags underneath, his hair was a mess, “(y/n) I don't know what to say..” his deep voice cut through. Shit, you blinked faster preventing the tears from falling.

“Why did you do it...Why did you leave..Why did you kiss her when you knew I was showing up, why wouldn't you talk to me..did you not love me? Was I just a distraction?” Fuck, the tears were falling faster than you could blink. You were crying harder, your breathing increased and Harry shifted closer to you.

“No, no of course not love.” He reached up and wiped the tears from your cheek. “I loved you so so much. I still do-I just” “You clearly don't love me Harry. Otherwise you wouldn’t have left in the first place.” “(y/n) you don't understand...”

“I don't. I don't understand. How can you say you love me when two weeks ago you personally destroyed me.”

He couldn't take it anymore. He reached his arms out and pulled you into him. His heart was breaking all over again just seeing the pain you were in. “Im sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I meant to make life easier. I-” his voice broke and you saw he was now crying. “(y/n) I know I fucked up...I know I did. I love you so much and I-” you gave in. If Im never going to see him again, why not get a proper goodbye. You reached up and pulled his lips to yours. He was surprised at first but soon took over. He bit hard onto your lip and you knew it was going to bruise. His hands pulled you to a sitting position on his lap where your fingers tangled into his hair. His lips went from yours to your neck and right below your ear. You softly moaned leaning into him. He sucked gently on your neck before moving back to your lips. You could taste his tears and you knew he could taste yours. You stood up and pulled him with you but he grabbed you again, lifting you so that your legs closed tightly around his waist. He was making his way towards the stairs when the door opened. He quickly dropped you and backed away. You were both out of breath.

“Your 10 minutes are up Styles.”

You looked at him and he looked back and you looked down. Don't go, don't go..And then he was gone. Leaving you falling to the floor in sobs, watching him leave yet again.

Okay but seriously...the candle is at target and smells so so good. I hope you all enjoy! xoxo

#one direction #one direction fanfiction #one direction imagines #Harry Styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #fine line #candles

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knightingale-xiv · 6 years ago

Text

Bingo

Arthur D'ehcan made his way through the busy streets of Ul'dah. Today he was on the government clock...they had been kind enough to accommodate his time with the Glass Network but he DID occasionally have to return to his day job. He had to admit he always felt better coming back to fight normal crime committed by normal people. No legendary super beings or cosmic hell entities to make him feel small. Just your average crook that didn't so much as require a Chakra to take down. This was basically his vacation...

Today's assignment involved a Gil laundering scheme that had crossed onto the radar of the authorities. As an Alliance Operative, his job was to check out issues across Eorzea, big and small. The Flames needed someone to check out the scene and Arthur was close on hand. He had to go somewhat incognito, so he went in his typical street clothes. The long tan coat and blue vest were light enough to withstand the rising temperatures and protect his skin, while keeping him relatively cool.

Arthur really only had a few stand out qualities as a hyur. He was handsome, sure, but not overtly so. He thought of himself as quite average honestly. He was average height and his clothes hid his musculature well enough to make him appear of average physique as well. His eyes, while a piercing blue, had no special qualities when he wasn't using aether, and his white hair barely registered in the sea of unusual colors that populated this star. He was, for all intents and purposes, easy to overlook.

That made him perfect for jobs like these on paper. In practice...he had a bad habit of drawing ire. Whether it was his terrible jokes, or his quick-to-action reflexes, he was notorious for getting into fights. Still...he was more than capable to handle a simple assignment like this...right?

The target building was a large square shaped stone structure with a flat roof and tinted windows. The door even had a non-descript but heavy duty lock on it. It SCREAMED evil hideout. Arthur made sure his Repose pistol was tucked away safely in its holster under his arm, and nodded to himself. He could approach this stealthily...maybe sneak in a window on the second floor, or see if there was a skylight in the roof...But then again, he wasn't really sure he needed to be. They only suspected this was a gil laundering scheme, and those usually meant fronts and stores. It was very likely he could just...walk in...

While he contemplated this, he noted a middle aged woman in a black veil entering the establishment...How curious. She was being escorted by a man around her age, who used a golden key to unlock the doors and get them inside. How very curious indeed. Arthur moved towards the door to catch it as it began to swing closed, following the pair inside and preparing for the den if villainy he was about to walk into...

"B 23!"

Now, there are a few things that the Alliance trained their spies for. How to resist torture, how to blend into a crowd, how to stomach the sight of unspeakable evils without losing your cool too much...What Arthur hadn't been prepared for was...this...

An enthusiastic gentleman was shimmy dancing behind a podium, a little spherical cage beside him being turned via crank by a happy looking young assistant. There was a band in the corner playing lively music and a SEA of excited retired women, their daughters, and husbands just going bonkers over what appeared to be...Bingo.

There were other games too, and judging by the enthusiasm, lights, and the general buzz of excitement...It seemed to the young agent that he had settled on a delightful little casino for the wealthy and retired...He watched as gil changed hands, as patrons made bets and won or lost cash. If he were a no good money launderer, this would be a perfect way to cycle in and out his stolen cash...

His eyes wandered up to the shimmying number caller...he looked familiar. He was a charming looking individual with slicked back blonde hair and mischievous green eyes. He was a littke gaunt and willowy, but he made up for that with personality. Still, Arthur felt like something was missing...It kept him just enough on edge to be suspicious about everything. He walked around casually, sitting at slot machines or enjoying the occasional game of...throwing dice? He didn't gamble, so he had no idea how any of these worked. It was probably why he kept losing. Still, the Alliance would reimburse him his losses...he hoped.

He kept his eyes peeled throughout the day, watching as the employees of this hidden casino shuffled around with trays or sacks of gil...they always seemed to funnel back into a back room seperate from the main money changing station...Perhaps thats where the funny money was.

Money laundering involved swapping out 'dirty' gil that has been stolen from banks, exchanges, or merchants with clean gil from normal people. Thats why businesses were best for it, because it made sure the money was so spread out that it became impossible to track. He needed to get into that back room...He waited for the right opportunity, standing up and moving to a table near the door. The door had a lock on it and it seemed each worker had a key. There was also a guard posted by the door in disguise as a casino patron...Arthur would have to distract him first.

He let his gaze wander to a nearby group where the black veiled woman, who looked to be a dowager of some kind...Ironic, was being talked up by some younger men, eager to capitalize on her situation...she seemed thrilled with the attention. The man with her, who appeared to be her guard, was not. He looked about ready to start swinging. Arthur did a quick mental evaluation of the man...Big and strong, certainly, but not a random killer. He'd knock a few heads if pushed, but whoever he hit would survive...Arthur hoped, at least.

Arthur timed it almost perfectly. A casino worker moved to the back door and unlocked it just as the young agent threw a small ball bearing subtly, but with force, into the knee pit of the leg on the young suitor in front of the widower. This caused him to stumble forward and spill his drink on her face, while his face planted itself firmly in her ample chest. How embarrassing...as suspected, the guard leapt on the opportunity, grabbing the poor man by the collar and screaming at him. The Casino guard lept up and ran over to calm things down, and Arthur slipped through the closing door before it could click shut.

Once inside, he pulled a mask out from inside his coat and placed it in his face. The magitek device clicked and expanded to form a smooth helmet that covered his head and hid his hair from view. History said that if HE looked unusual his HAIR was very easy to remember. How many times had people lucked into figuring out his identity as Nightingale because he had similar hair? Too many...not making that mistake again. He took in his surroundings as he moved into a more shadowed section.

He was in a hallway that curved to the right about fifteen fulms ahead. The casino worked had just dissipated around that very corner and judging by the sound of the footsteps, he was going up some stairs. There was a voice calling out to him, and the casino member responded before continuing his walk and leaving audio range. Another guard...

Arthur quietly slipped to the corner and peered around and up the stairs. Sure enough, an armed guard was at the top of the staircase in front of a heavy metal door. The door was, at the moment, open. He could hear the clinking of coins in the room beyond it. The man was very clearly a criminal thug, for a few reasons. He had a tattoo of the Lions of Ul'dah, Arthur's old foes, and he matched the description of a wanted man. That was enough for Arthur to take action. He slipped around the corner and hefted his handgun, firing a pair of rounds. The arcanochemical rounds came out nearly silent from the pistol and slammed into the chest of the unaware goon. The guard started to sink, but Arthur was there to catch him before his knees even kissed the ground. He gently eased the man down, to let him slip into blissful sleep.

“Sweet dreams...” he murmured, patting the thug on the cheek before slowly rising and holstering his pistol. He took a canister out of his coat and pressed a button on top. Needles had been helping him work on a gel compound that would provide decent armoring when he couldn’t just stroll into a place wearing his full kit. He placed the canister to his chest and it released the gel, the substance coming out like a foam before hardening into a smooth shell over his chest and shoulders. Nice...

He stood up and peered around the open metal door at the interior. There were a number of tables with people sitting at them, sorting and counting gil from the casino and replacing them with gil that were most likely stolen. The house was most likely losing a number of bets to get more gil out quickly, without raising too much suspicion...And non-syndicate gambling wasn’t really something people talked about unless they wanted the Brass Blades kicking in the door. There were also spare casino items here...A few card tables, some decorations, those little round cages the bingo balls came out of...Looks like it was full and ready to be swapped in at any given moment. It was kind of...comically huge.

Focus, Agent...Arthur looked back at the occupants of the room. Various counters, but they didn’t look like they were going to be overly dangerous...The ten armed guards inside WERE going to be an issue. An assortment of different races with an assortment of different armaments. Roegadyn to Lalafell, swords to small crossbows, there was just a variety of pain in the room...and each and every one had a wanted posted on Arthur’s desk. Jackpot...This was more than enough to take everyone down, all he had to do was get the Flames and the Brass Blades to march in here. That shouldn’t be so hard...

Arthur heard a click and a bang behind him. Someone had managed to sneak up on him...In the milliseconds he had, he cursed his inattentiveness. He should have been keeping his ears focused on the stairway. It sounded like a firearm of some sort...Not a flintlock, the hammer was too clean and the click made it sound like it was hitting a firing pin, not flint. Revolver...Needles and Arthur hadn’t tested the armor against revolver rounds yet, but Arthur was confident he would be fine...In normal circumstances, he would be...Unfortunately for Arthur D’ehcan, his trusty Goblin engineer had improperly measured a minor ingredient in the gel for this field testing canister. Instead of hardening on impact, as it was designed to do, the armor turned immediately brittle and disintegrated allowing the round to tear through his shoulder from behind.

Arthur staggered forward and fell into a roll, directly into the counting room. The blonde man from the casino was here, eyes wide with anxiety and sweat beading on his brow. He was pointing the smoking gun at Arthur and shaking. Arthur recognized him now...Keetan ‘the Willow’ Hupp. He was a small time crook, mostly wanted for small scale scams and ploys. His bounty was actually for tax evasion, although in Ul’dah that was...Pretty serious. Now he could be tried for assault with a deadly weapon and running an illegal gambling den, as well as for robbery and money laundering. No wonder he shot...

“W-W-Who are you!?” Keetan asked, gesturing erratically with the gun. Arthur sat up slightly, a hand to his wound. The thugs, alerted by the gunshot, were ushering the counters out another door and coming to surround him. Not good...

“Normally...someone asks that BEFORE shooting...” Arthur grunted with a chuckle, wincing at the pain from the motion. It was a clean shot, through and through...He wouldn’t be able to fight effectively with the arm, but the shock was fading. He just had to not get shot again.

“S-Shut up and answer me!” Keetan demanded, pulling the hammer back on the gun. Arthur raised his injured hand in surrender.

“Alright...Alright...My name is Ima...” He said with a sigh. “Last name, Numpty.” Keetan looked confused, putting it together in his head.

“...Ima Numpty?” He asked, trying to confirm the unusual name. Arthur smiled.

“You said it, not me...”

Arthur was up on his feet in an instant, his leg coming around in a sweeping kick to knock Keetan’s revolver out of his hand. He underestimated the man’s tense grip, however, and the con man didn’t release. He DID fire a round in a panic though, sending it into the thigh of an elezen bodyguard. The man let out a cry of pain and hopped aside, dropping his sword and clutching at the wound. Arthur capitalized on this, his leg still in the air, by bringing it back and jumping in one fluid motion. He kicked off of Keetan’s face, sending him flying out the door and rattling down the stairs. Arthur landed hard on the floor with a grunt but used his uninjured arm to propel him through the gap now made in the defensive lines by the hopping elezen.

He brought his leg around as he flung himself across the ground, to knock the injured elezen’s standing foot out from under him and send him crashing down. Scratch two. Arthur rolled to his feet and backed up from the now advancing line of bodyguards. Nine armed men and Arthur was down an arm. It seemed more fair this way...

The guards rushed him, seeking to overwhelm him with numbers. It was a good plan...Arthur rolled over the table he was in front of and kicked it, sending gil flying and the table hurtling into the men and scattering them like bowling pins. Arthur winced as the Lalafell of the bunch took it to the forehead.

“Sorry, little guy...” he murmured, running over to the rounded cage. He gripped it with his good hand, now slick with blood, and hurled it towards the window of the upper level. It smashed through the window and careened to the ground, sending little white ping pong balls flying everywhere. Arthur looked at the rising guards and gave a two fingered salute before diving out after it. He smashed through what was left of the glass and descended towards where the cage had landed. He hit it hard and rolled off with a groan. One of the numbered balls landed on his face, bouncing into his hand. ‘B 23′.

“Huh...” He groaned, tossing it aside and standing up. The guards were shouting and running out of view, most likely to come downstairs and try to kill him. Time to go...He reached up to his ear and called into the Flames station while he ran off.

“Agent D’ehcan to Flame Control...Good news...” He smirked a little as he ran towards the gate and towards his parked bike.

“Go ahead, Agent.” Flame Control responded. Arthur revved the engine and took off towards his safehouse. He looked over his shoulder to see two men mounting chocobos to pursue. He grinned and looked ahead, holding his wound.

“I got Bingo...”

#Arthur D'ehcan #ffxiv #nightingale #Ul'dah

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positiveparker · 6 years ago

Text

I Miss You Part 7 (Haz Osterfield)

Hi everyone :) Thank you for all the support on my other fics! I think I am gonna try and make the next part the end of the series because I don't want it to be dragged out eeeek. I promise I will make it a good ending! :) - L

- pairing ; haz x reader (I finally changed it! Also sorry if it floods up the Haz tags with Tom stuff)

- warnings ; swearing! fluff! kinda smut (BUT ITS KINDA NOT COS I CANT FOR THE LIFE OF ME WRITE SMUT), angst (maybe if you squint)

- song ; Happiness by Rex Orange County (listen here)

- masterlist

- prompt list

not my gif

“(y/n) I-“ Tom muttered

“So thats it, you’ve been cheating with her this whole time” I interrupted. I shoved my hand in the direction of Z, she looked shocked and offended but at that point I didn’t care. I scrunched my face trying to stop tears from falling,

“Yes” Tom stuttered softly, he glared at the floor.

“Look at me!” I screamed, my eyes had scrunched too much spilling hot tears.

“(y/n) I think that’s enough” Haz said grabbing my hand. His warm fingers soothed my seething anger. He rubbed his thumb up and down the top of my hand and then led me away. Our skin touching made my heart skip a beat. We stepped over the glass and he led me out the front door. I still had burning anger at the pit of my stomach so I turned around. Haz jolted back as I came to a stop.

“you’re a real arsehole you know that, for being mad at me for cheating. When you’re the one screwing around” I spat. Jacob gasped and tried really hard not to laugh. Nicola sort of nodded approvingly at me. I tried to catch a glimpse of everyone as Haz pulled me away.

“That was badass” He admitted chuckling to himself

“Thank you Harrison” I laughed, we walked down the street. I didn’t even have any shoes on because I left them on the floor in the living room and I didn’t even have a coat. I rubbed my goosebump covered arms.

“shit, we left our coats didn’t we?” Haz chuckled

“I’m so freezing oh my god” I said pressing my body against Harrison’s. My teeth violently chattered so he wrapped his arm around me as we walked down the pavement. He grip tightened every so often as I melted into his body. We reached the end of the street and on the corner there was a coffee shop. It had a neon sign in the shape of a coffee cup, its warm orange light reflected on the small droplets of water on the pavement.

“I’m so cold can we go in there” I pointed

“I agree, I need a cappuccino ASAP” Haz shivered. We stole away into the coffee shop and approached the counter.

“chocolate latte please” I muttered to the barista, my teeth still chattering. The coffee shop was painted orange and warm indie music was playing out of speakers.

“cinnamon cappuccino” Haz smiled, I didn't have any money but Haz insisted he still owed me for the Chinese meal.

We took our scorching drinks and grabbed a sofa. I slumped down into the leather and sipped my drink.

“I am again so sorry about Bella” Haz repeated

“Haz, don’t worry” I slurped

“I know it is a sensitive subject”

“Yeah” I sighed “I haven’t really talked about the whole uni and job thing to you have I?”

“No” Haz replied “But, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to” He said softly placing a hand on my arm.

“No it’s fine” I replied “Well, when I met Tom I had just come out of school. I failed all my exams because I was going through a really rough time. My friends all went off to Uni and I didn’t” I could feel myself choking up but I tried to hold myself together by taking another sip of my latte. The warm liquid burned me back to reality, I gazed over at Haz. His hand was still placed supportively on my arm. He could obviously see I was upset so he rubbed his thumb across my arm, pinching the material of my dress at every stroke. He looked so invested in me and what I had to say, it sort of mended my old unstitched wounds.

I carried on “So, I lived with my parents for a while until I met Tom, he promised to support me financially until I got a proper job. I haven’t applied for anything since…”

“What did you want to do?” Haz asked softly

“I wanted to direct films” I admitted “But, I didn't have the grades for film school”

“Don’t worry (y/n)” Haz breathed “Is that what you really want to do?” He pressingly asked

“Yes, I have since I was super young. Why?” I replied. Haz smiled and then pulled out his phone.

“What are you doing?” I asked worriedly. I tried to peek at his phone screen but he hid it from me. I protested and tried to grab his phone but he stood up and carried on typing. After a few minutes he sat back down and grinned at me.

“You are starting at the London Film School in January” He smiled at me. He looked so chuffed with himself. My heart dropped suddenly.

“What?”

“My uncle works there, I put in a special recommendation” He smirked nudging my arm with his elbow.

“That doesn’t mean I have actually got in though” I laughed modestly

“Well, you need to submit some of your work”

“like a short film?”

“Yeah” Haz said brining his drink to his lips and sipping on it lightly

“I haven’t got any updated work” I huffed

“Well, why don’t we do a short film together?” Haz suggested

“What? Like you act and I direct?”

“Yes! It’s an amazing idea!” He said excitedly setting down his cup and standing up. “I’ll be the knight, defending the princess from the dragon” He acted it out by flexing his muscles and pretending to be sword fight the air. I laughed and clapped jokily. “Or, a lost man who results to drinking to numb his pain” Haz wobbled around and pretended to chug an invisible bottle.

“Or! A young actor trying to find a job” I cried

“Yes, and on his journey he meets a young girl who likes film making”

“Yes, and then they fall madly in love with each other” I said standing up. “It’s set in a country town, by the sea!” Ideas were flowing from my brain and out of my lips. Haz glared at me in awe.

“You really are extraordinary (y/n)” He smirked, He edged closer to me and wrapped his arm around my waist. My face edged closer to his. His grip slowly tightened around me as his arm snaked around my waist more and more.

“We are closing!” The barista shouted. We both broke from our loving gaze and quickly chugged the rest of our drinks.

Haz made me feel so comfortable and free. I was so distracted and hadn’t thought of Tom and what he had done since we left the Holland's house. Haz and I thanked the barista and ran back out into the cold with our fingers intertwined together.

“Stay at my apartment?” Haz suggested as we stumbled happily down the street.

“Well, I was kind of thinking of that already. I don’t want to see Tom for a while” I admitted tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

“Yeah, no worries!” Haz said softly “I have a pull out couch”.

In my heart I knew it was a bit bad of me to be craving to sleep in Haz’s bed but secretly I knew he was joking about the couch. We walked up to his apartment building and he slid his key into the lock and turned it. We tiptoed up the soft carpeted steps and reached his door.

He slid his other key into the lock and I noticed a huge scar on his hand as he twisted it around.

“What happened to your hand?” I asked

“Oh nothing”

“Show me” I protested, trying to grab his hand. I tugged the keys out of his grip and look at his hand. I uncurled his strong fingers and analysed the huge scar across the inside of his hand.

“what happened?” I gasped

“Nothing” Haz protested drawing his hand away.

“Why don’t you want to tell me?”

“Because you were there” Haz muttered pressing his head against the door. He looked embarrassed and then I remember the loud noise the night I left his apartment.

“Th- the noise I heard” I stuttered “what did you do” I said worryingly gazing up into his blue eyes

“I smashed a vase on the ground, out of anger” He admitted “It slit my hand when I was picking up the pieces”

“I am sorry” I said grabbing his hand. He looked at me and smiled slightly.

“It’s not your fault, I was an idiot” he huffed

“An idiot for what” I said taking his hand a kissing his scar lightly

“For ever letting you go” He said. He looked at me passionately and I returned his gaze. He flung the door open and pulled me inside. He grabbed me and I wrapped my arms around him. He picked me up swinging my legs around his hips and sitting me on his counter. Impulse took over and my dress was already off and so was his shirt. Our bodies pressed up against each other, I pushed him down onto the sofa and straddled over him lightly kissing his chest. I reached his stomach and then returned to his soft lips, he flipped me over and propped himself above me.

“I Miss You” He smiled breathily

“I Miss You too” I breathed back.

He grinned and then cupped his hand around my back and I curled my hands in his hair. Then one thing led to another and we were in his room, our bodies intertwining in his sheets.

I turned over to stare into his eyes. He was drifting off to sleep but immediately came to when I rolled over.

“I love you” He whispered into my ear

“Say it again” I smirked

“I love you (y/n)”

He then proceeded to lean over me and kiss me lightly. First my head then my nose, my cheek, the side of my neck and then he started quickly dotting them all over my face. After every kiss he would softly say “here”. Then he reached my lips and looked down at them. He brushed his finger lightly over them and said “and definitely here”. I bit my lip and then he kissed me, I pushed him over and then I rolled on top of him laughing. I lay my head down on his chest as he stroked my head.

“Your heart is beating so fast” I said placing one of my hands on his chest

“really? Usually when I’m with you it feels like my heart stops” He giggled

“what, so I basically kill you then” I laughed jokily, I knew Haz was going to come out with some beautiful poetic sentence from his soft lips straight after.

“No, you stop space, time and everything just with your beauty” He whispered softly. I looked up and him and pecked him lightly.

“You aren’t so bad yourself” I laughed, Haz always hated when I killed the lovey dovey mood with my jokes. He sulked and grabbed a pillow slamming it down on my face. I protested and threw it off. I pushed myself over and snuggled down into bed with Haz’s arms comforting me.

TAGLIST ;

@tomsfireheart @feelingsareharddd @lovelyh0lland @i-dont-wanna-go-mr-stark @hazeyholland @lookclosernow @choke-me-sweet-pea @whatareyouhidingpeter

#haz fanfiction #haz x reader #haz osterfield #tom h #tom holland x reader #tom imagine #tom holland masterlist #harrison fanfiction #harrison osterfield imagine #tom holland as spiderman #tom holland fan fiction #tom hollang gifs

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galimatios · 7 years ago

Text

fear thy fortune chatlog notes

thinking abt the underdeveloped au i have in that weird off color fantasy universe that i realized is probably similar in ways to bloodborne even before i knew abt bloodbornes plot but this is nice bc i can solidify parts of it and i can probably also combine it with the knights au i have

OK I FORGOT TO PUT A CW HERE BUT CW FOR ABUSE MENT AND GORE MENT

somewhere located in present day west asia slash east europe theres a country divided into numerous states in which princes and princesses (princex (poc)/princen/etc for gender neutral options) are perpetually in contest with eachother for the right to be the divine ruler of the country

monarchy is not guided by blood, rather the church is responsible for finding the chosen candidates via prophecy, fururesight, dream interpretation, etc, and these kids are taken from their homes and reared as royalty the nature of this country is ... severe. pain is a gift, proof that one is alive. much ceremony is based in sacrifice, bloodspill, bloodsports, and pain endurance. magic as practiced by the church is extremely powerful in terms of healing so almost all wounds can be healed provided the heart still beats its essentially one big huge freakish cult of a country that has customs that seem barbaric to outsiders

the divine ruler of each state is the princens, though more often than not their councils do most of the governing with the princen merely being a puppet figurehead. they go through rigorous training to sharpen their minds and endurance against all types of pain, so training includes physical, mental, emotional trials in which the princen is supposed to keep a clear mind, concentrate on mediation or some mantra, bearing whatever is thrown at them. additionally they receive the best training in both combat and politics as well as magic. not all princen can withstand the requirements ofc so they.. vary quite a bit in terms of stability/constitution. its a p sick system even without the knights added in bc thats super messed up

the knights essentially belong to their princens in heart body mind and soul, and each princen receives exactly one knight soulbound to them. they also undergo the same scouting process once the princen is identified, and they undergo similar training except theyre also essentially brainwashed into believing their entire purpose in life is to serve and protect their princen no matter what. obviously this aint healthy! knights delude themselves into it so hard theyll fight for the system that literally abuses them! but thats how cults work

that being said knights are extremely powerful. they act as the sole bodyguard of their princen and believe me you dont want to get inbetween a knight and their prince. they are known especially for their brutality when their lords are threatened. it is extremely common for limbs to be lost in skirmishes btwn assailants and a knight

this takes us to the games! which are essentially gladiator coliseum type bloodsport contests between knights of different princens. its a pretty big affair like how the Olympics are for us so the fanfare the cheering the everything is all there i prob dont need to describe it in detail but its very violent. its considered practice for the knights before the true battle-royale type event thats even BIGGER bc it determines who becomes god-king of the country. this time the princen join their knights in the battlefield and basically whoever is left standing is the new king

is it worth it? probably not bc i think being king actually means being killed to be sent up to the heavens bc god kings dont need bodies any longer in truth the entire debacle is a distraction set up by the church to keep the country under its own control. its super corrupt. the council behind every princen is actually made up of high ranking church members that convene regularly to manipulate the politics of the region

but thats mostly the governing sphere of this world. the commonfolk are removed from most of this violence aside from the indoctrination by the church and the messed up religion they practice. a lot of the belief system here relies on this concept of karma and fate over free will. fate is oppressive, cannot be changed, but god do they try that belief ties into how princen and knights are fated to be pairs, how princen are fated to either ascend to godhood or die trying

but there is one way to manipulate fates in this world there exists in independent of the church a monastery that practices the art of transferring karma. think of karma as a type of currency that can be spent, saved, used, etc. lots of good karma may be distributed amongst loved ones via a ritual headed by a monk, or bad karma can be "paid off" essentially. the amount of good/bad karma a person has directly affects their fortune and luck. this practice is more or less outlawed by the church but the monastery is slowly gaining power over the commonfolk and the church mostly leaves the poor folk to rot anyway- their agenda mostly concerns the monarchy

altho i can definitely see tensions rising with the witch hunting as influenced by the church. particularly nefarious visions may result in blame being thrown around and commoners getting killed for crimes they have yet to commit and thats thanks to the teachings of the church

anyway as of rn though the monastery is still pretty small but it is an old, ancient organization with magic that runs far deeper than the magic of the church. it is a much more subtle magic- monks practice little offensive magic (they are a nonviolent sort anyway) but the ability to exchange karma is rare and has far more reaching impact in the long run i imagine they have strongholds further to the east but anyway theres one trump card the monastic order has

a subsection of the order is dedicated to the keeping of miracles. and miracles are... monsters! they are semi-physical manifestations of literal suffering and the sheer emotional energy provided by them is enough to give miracles the power to.. well. perform miracles.

when a person dies in anguish, there is a chance that their bodies will not decompose the way they are meant to. instead they slowly dissipate, bodies turning coal black and ashen to the touch. these cannot be disposed of the normal way (curses, contamination, all kinds of horrible things happen) so instead these corpses get locked up inside brick cells within the monastery

once, one of these was opened only to reveal that the bodies were gone- only a humming, massive shadow that seemed to move as if made of flies or soot combined. and it spoke, too. this was the first miracle created it was discovered then that these creatures had immense power but could not leave the rooms they were imprisoned in, touch sunlight, and similarly they could not die

imagine like the witchs nightmares in pmmm and you get what its like to be a soul trapped in a miracle. u get to relive ur worst fears and regrets forever. it suck miracles also cannot direct their powers towards their own will, only the will of others. ofc they are still monsters and exact a price for their services, whatever it may be.

a meeting with a miracle does not come cheap or without consequence, bc although miracles can be performed, karma always rebalances itself in the end. monks tasked with guarding and curating the miracles are called gatekeepers and are often someone close to one of the souls trapped in the vortex anyway i think thats the basics of everything in there... i got an au w cyrus as a prince and alex as his knight and instead of sticking around for their inevitable deaths the pair run off into the countryside far far away

actually i think something went wrong in the ceremony. cyrus and alex win godkingship of then... something goes wrong. probably the whole die-to-ascend thing is a secret kept from the princen and the public and. alex does a thing a knight should not do a refuses to let the ceremony continue. and im p sure as soon as cyrus learns of the truth hes like haha well fuck that

then they spend the rest of their days actually experiencing what life is like outside of a freakish cult and my fucking feels

i think.. meanwhile the monastic order grows in influence and power making them the enemy of the church... and jonah (yonah in this au) sacrifices himself to the miracle containing his brother in order to give the miracle a corporal form. which means august and company now have a physical conduit for all that power they had.

bad news for the church! bc august was unrightfully killed bc of a prophecy saying that hed become a huge threat and a killer

funny how prophecies work!

so now hes out for blood and he probably uses his own charisma and power to stage a coup against the church and basically the country goes to hell and i think at this point cyrus thinks. i got out of there alive. i need to do something about this. so he and alex probably join in and become arbiters of the game esp since cyrus and alex were probably the best synced, most skilled prince/knight duo the church had seen up to that date so theyre very powerful. ofc theyre still only two people so i really wonder how theyll step in btwn these two opposing parties

augusts side isnt good either bc august... is only out for revenge and self interest. he has no interest in fixing the country or helping anyone in fact once august is firmly seated on the throne of power he probably declares himself god-king anyway the end game probably looks like augusts body (which is jonahs body) being destroyed and the miracle contained in it finally put to rest jonahs soul must have something to do with the exorcism process- theyve tried to exorcise miracles before and only ended up upsetting it into violent outbursts anyway thats enough rambling from me time to paste this all into a blog post

god what if august picked keith to be his knight. thats messed up. keiths so easy to manipulate and hed be such a wildcard of a knight. he has more magic potential than alex and hes faster on his feet. im imagining bloodlust frenzy almost hyena-like behavior. also i mostly just want to see keith being violent and evil and i have an outfit in mind that would look great with a little splash of red

think like minimalistic ouji but like all black and keith with knives and serving a clearly twisted (even more than usual bc of the miracle’s influence) august

god even better the aftermath of augusts death TIME FOR THE FUCKING FEELS TO KICK IN BC now Keith has no purpose/he FAILED to protect his king WHICH WAS HIS ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE then alex coming in with cy and just no, you have inherent worth. what happened wasn't right im upset this is how alex and keith become family in this au

miracles i think in this case are definitely more of a means to an end i think narratively ie jonahs brother being killed and augusts soul being trapped within it- tho i think its a good tie-in into how the severe paranoid cultish way the society works ends up producing a lot of People Dying In Extreme Anguish

almost a buildup of sickness so to say.. a plague of the soul that's a cool avenue to go down tbh the idea that miracles are more like viruses spreading misfortune in the long run for some quick gain in this life but bc karma always collects her debts if i throw in some nice reincarnation that would effectively damn someone in their next life... that implies that this story may need to expand across different generations

mechanics being so much bullshit has happened in this country it houses multiple miracles whereas elsewhere its like one, or none, very few in their histories except possibly during wartime and famine

since magic is Exists in this it makes sense that the emotional energy combined w ambient energy would manifest in some kind of grotesque Being

oh no thats maybe why the church is manipulating things by purposely generating that emotional trauma in its society its producing unprecedented amounts of energy they can utilize as magic power oh no thats super bad august would definitely take advantage of that bc hed definitely figure the truth out once hes back to being alive

im upset bc i think they use princens and knights to specifically create emotional energy

energy released upon death which typically happens after a knight/prince duo has been chosen... then the resulting STRONG ass char plague on their bodies are collected to make artifacts? yes

gems created from the ashen plague are embedded into a huge mandala that actually ... is the god-king itself

#notes #worlds #fear thy fortune #abuse ment #gore ment #// this is pasted from a chatlog lmao

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peterpparkrr · 7 years ago

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Changing the Tide: An Avengers Fanfic (5/7)

Summary: Wanda Maximoff is the new girl in town and also reconciling with the death of her twin brother, Pietro. As she starts to navigate her new life she manages to stumble into friendship with a group of teens who are surprisingly similar to her

A/N: This is basically just a highschoolAU for the Avengers without powers.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

The next day Wanda got to school earlier. She made sure to keep her head down as she walked the hallways before first hour. If she was going to make sure that Clint and the others left her alone she was going to make it as hard as possible for them to try and talk to her.

She made sure to walk into History seconds before the final bell rang. Wanda handed Thor back his notebook. She had started with the notes last night and copied down all ten pages of his notes in a few hours.

“Thanks,” She said, trying to be kind yet distant, before Thor could try to say anything Mr. Coulson was starting class and Wanda felt like she had jumped the first hurdle of the day.

After class Wanda got up and was out the door before Thor could register that she was gone.

Biology was much harder. Wanda had taken her time walking to the room but when she got there Steve was sitting at their table, waiting for her. She smiled awkwardly, unsure of what to do, the only other open spot in the room was next to Tony, which didn’t exactly seem like a more preferable option. When she sat down Steve tried to catch her eye.

“I just wanted you to know that I don’t see being kind to you as some sort of job I got put up to.”

“Okay,” Wanda replied, her tone neutral. Wanda wasn’t sure if she could trust Steve, she barely knew him after all, she barely knew any of these people. Wanda had never trusted anyone other than Pietro and she still wasn’t ready to admit that she was alone now.

Steve left her alone for the rest of the hour. Her conversation with Natasha during french was very similar, though Natasha admitted that Clint was stupid a lot of the time, but added that Wanda would be stupid to ignore that he was trying to do the right thing.

Philosophy was more of the same, Steve lefter alone (so did everyone else) but it was after philosophy that Wanda realized that she was going to have a problem. She didn’t have anyone to sit with at lunch. Normally this wouldn’t be a problem, Wanda had always sat with Pietro or by herself (at her old school she had essentially been invisible) but when she walked through the hallway to the lunchroom and noticed people were watching her it was then that Wanda had somehow gotten mixed up with the most popular kids in school.

Normally Wanda avoided popular kids like the plague, unfortunately, Wanda hadn’t realized that they were popular, at her old school the popular kids had been the rich kids who could have parties and nice clothes or the varsity players. These guys weren’t who he would have assumed to be the popular kids, sure, Tony was rich and his dad was famous, and Thor and Steve were super athletic, but he could barely see them being friends with each other, let alone people like Bruce or Natasha.

However, before Wanda could worry more about who she was going to eat with Steve was next to her, “Are you going to eat with us?” He asked.

“Um...yeah,” Wanda replied. She could tell that Steve was surprised by her response but he tried to not look to pleased.

When they got to their table everyone tried to be nice to Wanda without making it too obvious. Wanda almost felt worse because of the fact that they were treating her like a rabbit that they didn’t want to scare away than she had yesterday when she felt like they were all pretending to be nice to her.

Maybe Wanda had over-reacted? Should she just let go of her assumptions and let them in?

No.

At least, not yet.

Wanda stayed silent for most of lunch, after everyone relaxed slightly the conversations started up like normal and Wanda listened quietly while she picked at the sad excuse for a sandwich she had made herself before leaving the house. She didn’t even like turkey, so why had she slapped three pieces of it on the bread she had found in the pantry? Wanda was so wrapped up thinking about her poor sandwich making skills that she didn’t notice when Clint sat down next to her.

“I’m sorry about yesterday,” he said, breaking Wanda out of her train of thought, she looked up, no one else was listening to them, they all had their own conversations going.

“Okay,” Wanda replied. She hadn’t really forgiven Clint for what he had said, but Wanda wasn’t exactly one to hold grudges - at least not outwardly. The internal battle Wanda was having was fierce. She had always been a fighter, but right now she just wanted to give up.

Wanda couldn’t help but think back to being at the hospital after Pietro’s accident. When Clint found her she was hiding in the storage closet bawling her eyes out.

“Um… can I help you?” a boy about her age asked. Wanda looked up, startled by the intruder before she realized that she was the one who wasn’t supposed to be here.

“Sorry, I just- How could I have let this happen? It’s all my fault.” Wanda sobbed.

“What?” He asked, crouching down next to her.

“M-my brother was in a car accident, he’s in the ICU right now,” Wanda told him, “They don’t know if he’s going to make it.”

“I’m still not seeing how this is your fault,” He said gently.

“I was the one who told him leave.” Wanda cried, “We needed milk, I told him to just go find some, so he did and then he ran a red light a few blocks from our house. He got T-boned and now he’s here.”

"Hey, look at me. It’s your fault, it’s his fault, it’s the other driver’s fault, who cares." he replied, “Sitting here is going to change what happened.”

“They won’t let me or our parents back to see him,” Wanda said, pulling her hands away from her face.

“Oh, well I can probably sneak you into his room,” he replied nonchalantly as he stood up and held out his hand to help her up.

“Really, you would do that for me?” Wanda asked him as she got to her feet.

“Sure, as long as we don’t get caught.” He replied with a wink before grabbing her hand and leading her out of the closet.

The two of them snuck down the hallway and around a few doctors into the ICU.

“What’s his name?” The boy had asked her when they got to a nurses station.

“Pietro Maximoff,” She replied quickly, glancing around nervously.

“Hey, if you keep looking around like you’re not supposed to be here they’ll realize that you’re not and kick you out.” He told her while typing into the computer.

“Right, sorry,” She replied.

“Room 324,” He announced, looking up from the computer, “Right this way.”

Wanda nodded and followed him down the hallway.

“You can’t go in, unfortunately because there’s a bunch of nurses right now, but you can look into the room,” He told her while they walked briskly, “Are you ready for this?” He asked her, glancing sidelong at her.

“Yes,” she answered definitively.

“Well, this is it.” he said, gesturing to the room number next to the door right in front of him, “You’ve probably got five or six minutes until his doctors come back.”

Wanda nodded and walked up to the doorway. She hadn’t know what to expect, but she figured it would be something like on all of those doctor shows on TV, that Dr. McDreamy would be bossing around people and her family would be able to go home by the end of the episode.

That’s not really what it was like.

I mean, there was a nurse who seemed busy enough, but she hadn’t realize that he was actually hooked up to tons of machines, everything about the situation seemed wrong and -painful-. Wanda could barely see Pietro’s face, there were so many wires and tubes connected to it.

After what had felt like mere seconds to Wanda at the time but must have been several minutes in reality she had felt the hand of the boy on his shoulder.

“We need to go now,” He told her, his voice soft.

“No.”

“If we don’t I’m going to lose my job.”

Wanda sighed and turned away from her brother’s body.

At the time Wanda hadn’t know that would be the last time she would see her twin’s body while he was still alive.

“No, like I’m really sorry about what I said yesterday, that was super out of line,” Clint replied, snapping Wanda back into reality.

“You were there for me when no one else was, you have no idea how much that meant to me, I’ll never be able to thank you enough.” Wanda said, dutifully examining the bread of her sandwich so she wouldn’t have to look at him, “It’s just...I haven’t really talked about Pietro since it happened. I can’t.”

“That’s okay, we don’t have to talk about. Just know that whenever you’re ready, I’m here - we’re all here for you.” He said, “Even Tony, especially Tony.”

“Thanks, can we just drop it for now?”

“Of course,” Clint said with a slight smile, taking a bite of his lunch, “How are your classes? Catching up?” He asked through a mouthful of food.

“Yeah, I’ve had to do work every chance I get though, these teachers really do not take it easy do they?”

Steve looked over at Wanda when she said that, “That reminds me, we have a Philosophy study group that meets every Thursday after school to hash out ideas and help with the essays and stuff, you should join.”

Wanda nodded, “Oh, awesome, that would be a huge help.”

“And we all tend to get together every afternoon at someone’s house to do homework and hang out,” Clint added, “So you have a standing invitation for that too, we don’t always get a lot of work done though, so just know that if you show up you’re going to get distracted any time you try to do actual work.”

Wanda laughed slightly, “Okay.”

“We always figure it out in the groupchat, Peggy interjected, “can I add you?”

“Um.. sure,” Wanda replied, quickly rattling off her phone number as Peggy typed it into her phone. The moment Peggy was done Wanda heard her phone start pinging and pulled it out of her backpack.

(216)355-7654 (12:42) Omg is the new number wanda???

(216)355-7654 (12:42) heyyy wanda

(216)787-3584 (12:42) Yes. You heard our conversation, please stop texting the group chat for stupid reasons.

(216)355-7654 (12:42) sorry peg. Luv youuuuu

(216)651-4599 (12:43) we’re all sitting at the same table just talk to each other

“Um...” Wanda muttered.

“Here,” Clint said, putting his hand out, “I’ll but everyone’s contacts in so you know who’s who.”

Wanda nodded and handed her phone over to him. After a few minutes Clint handed her phone back and Wanda scrolled through to see the names of everyone at the table were now added into her phone, along with a few that she didn’t recognize.

“Who are these other people?” Wanda asked, pointing to their names.

“Oh, those are a few of our other friends, they don’t have this lunch though. Peter Parker is Tony’s stalker, Sam Wilson is Steve’s best friend, Hank Pym is another science nerd, I don’t really know why we need another one but I guess he’s cool, T’Challa’s another one of the exchange students, Carol Danvers is a badass who can do whatever she wants, and Bucky Barnes is basically Steve’s boyfriend.”

Wanda was still trying to take in all of this information in order to make sure she’d remember who everyone was, “I thought Steve and Peggy were…” Wanda replied, confused.

“No one really knows which one he’s actually interested in,” Clint replied, offhandedly, “Well, do you think you’ll come over this afternoon? Study group is at my house.”

“Sure, it’s not like I have anything else to do.” Wanda replied with a slight smirk.

#avengers #avengers imagine #avengers fanfic #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff fanfic #clint barton #clint barton fanfic #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfic #tony stark #tony stark fanfic #bruce banner #bruce banner fanfic #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fanfic

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nux-morbid-art · 7 years ago

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fallout oc questionnaire

in case anyone wanted a metric assload of info abt max mostly doing this for my benefit

Which Fallout game are they from? fallout 4

Which faction(s) did they join and which did they destroy? Why? Max initially joins the brotherhood and becomes a dedicated railroad heavy post blind betrayal. He cant stomach the thought of destroying the brotherhood, bc of the squires on board and a fair amount of allies within their ranks. Instead he enlists the help of the minutemen to maintain peace btw the 3 factions, eventually the brotherhood leave as the minutemen grow stronger

What is their S.P.E.C.I.A.L.? S: 4 P:5 C:8 I:10 A:7 L: 1

Give us a summary of their backstory. a rowdy teenager always in trouble, comes from a large extended family, low-middle class, pulled into the high school-to-military pipe. Spent his military career just trying to survive, trained field medic. Eldest of 3 siblings, has one younger brother and sister.

What’s their full name and does it have a meaning? Do they have any nicknames and how did they get em? Maxwell Ortiz, named after his grandfather who he was very close to. Called Vulture in high school for his looks and morbid sense of humor, earns “Mad Dog Max” in the military

What’s their sexual, romantic, and gender orientation? Do they feel comfortable telling other people? Bisexual, Biromantic, Transgender male He doesnt try to hide who he is, but he doesn’t volunteer the information either.

Do they have any mental illnesses? How do they cope? Max has bipolar depression and PTSD pre-war, and it doesnt exaclty get better after he thaws out Moslty he tries to keep busy. He deals w sensory overload by finding a small, quiet place to curl up and rest, favorite sensory stims for staying calm and focused are soft textures. he carries a small keychain stuffed animal he found in his pocket, and collects scraps of nice fabric and teddy bears. he’ll also run his hands thru his hair. he has an oral fixation and if he’s not occupied w a cigarrette he finds something to chew on, bites his nails, chews his fingers, picks at his skin too.

Do they have any medical conditions? Is medicine/ treatment available for them? Max loathes doctors, his only regular visit is to refill testosterone.

How much do they care about their outer appearance? What’s their “beauty routine”? How often do they shower/ bathe? Max neglects his appearance and hygiene and needs to be reminded to take care of himself. He loses weight and muscle mass quickly, noticing it can trigger dysphoria.

What do they fear the most? He will tell you hes already lived through his worst fear, losing Maria and his entire family, but ultimately, he fears being alone and becoming a bad person.

Their biggest flaw? Do they recognize it as a flaw? --ill get back to this one

What are they most insecure about? relationships w other people. he feels like trouble follows him and hurts the people he cares about, like hes the source of their misery and he cant figure out why they let him stay.

What Wasteland threat do they fear the most? (ex. Deathclaws, super mutants, raiders) Max fears nothing. Bring it on

What’s their zodiac sign or which one do you think they relate to the most? What are their placements (if you know them)? (ex. Aries sun, Taurus moon, Aquarius Venus) Scorpio

What’s their Myers–Briggs Type? (ex. ENTP, ISFJ) ---ill get back to this one

What Harry Potter house would they be in? (ex. Gryffindor, Ravenclaw) probably slytherin

Which Pokemon Go team would they choose? (ex. Instinct, Valor, Mystic) instinct, he would love taking care of eggs and raising baby pokemon

Out of the nine forms of intelligence (rhythmic, spatial, linguistic, mathematical, kinesthetic, interpersonal, intrapersonal, naturalistic, and existential) which one(s) are they really good at and which one(s) is(are) their weakest? best: rhythmic, spatial, naturalistic worst: intrapersonal, linguistic

What natural alignment are they? (ex. Lawful Good, Chaotic Evil) chaotic good

Do they have any hobbies? What are they? Max likes to play music, he’s decent w quitar, keyboard, and drums other than that he enjoys taking things apart and tinkering.

Do they have a favorite holiday? How do they celebrate it? He used to be rather fond of Easter, for family traditions. Food, family, kids running around and playing.

What’s their favorite season? Spring for sure, it brings relief from the worst of his depression

Do they have a temper or are they level headed? Hairpin temper, ready to fight at any trespass

Do they express their emotions freely or hide their true feelings? express freely but it takes him a while to figure out what they are.

Are they a leader or a follower? He will say hes no leader but takes the role naturally when he has to work in a group.

How do they come off to others? What first impression do they usually make? comes off as rather cold and aloof.

Do they prefer to travel alone or with company? Who have they traveled with if any? Current companion if any? prefers company by alot. he’s usually w danse, the two are joined at the hip. he also enjoys being w deacon, preston, and maccready. he gets along well w piper and curie. i’m not sure if he’d ever find cait, but he’d fall ass over teakettle for her. i’m not sure if he’d ever travel w most of the other companions.

Would you describe them as selfless or selfish? Does it depend on the situation? He’s pretty selfless, he cant stand suffering and will do his best to correct it. High empathy.

What do they find most attractive in others? Name at least one psychological and physical trait. (doesn’t have to be romantic attraction) Kindness, honesty, and humor. Physically, he has a weakness for full, round asses and nice thighs, hands that reveal secrets about their owners

Do they flirt often? How easily do they fall in love? its rare for him to be comfortable enough to be flirty, but when he is he’s damn good at it. he does fall quickly but takes a long time to understand the feelings for what they are.

What’s their love life like? Are they interested in anyone or in a relationship? Mostly monogamous relationship w Danse

Do they prefer to solve things diplomatically or using violence? He gives diplomacy a chance, but he’s not good at it. breaking noses is easier.

What is their combat style? What range do they prefer? Do they sneak? medium-close range, horrible at stealth. uses explosives and fire to confuse enemies and funnel them to his longer range combat partner, good at making a lane for snipers

What weapon(s) do they always carry with them? laser rifle, small pistol and a sidearm, and several combat knives kept razor sharp

Their most prized possession? a small collection of photos and holotapes codsworth preserved. he has a family photo of him, maria, his parents, and siblings w their children all together the tapes are mixes of pre-war rock n roll made by maria.

Their thoughts on power armor? ugh, if i really have to.

Favorite armor/ outfit? light, armored jackets, t-shirt, and jeans

How’s their aim? Do their hands shake while pointing a gun? he’s a pretty decent shot, but not spectacular. steady hands.

What are their thoughts on having to kill on a daily bases in order to survive? Does it take a toll on them? Or do they shake it off rather easily? He becomes numb to it. it comes creeping up on him on Bad nights, and thats where the fear of becoming an evil person comes in.

Thoughts on death if any? (ex. Fear it, accept it) “I am not allowed to die. I have people that need help.” He is very tired, lots of thoughts wishing for death, to rest. Tries to survive, but. He doesn’t really want to.

Do they move around a lot or prefer to have a place to call home? Both, eventually calls Railroad HQ and Diamond City home, but never stays in one place for long.

What’s their favorite location? gonna be cheesy: in Danse’s arms

Their opinions on ghouls, feral and not feral? Not feral: theyre just people. they didnt choose this. they’ve survived unknowable pain, and deserve respect and understanding. feral: killing them is mercy. he feels that they must have suffered greatly in becoming feral, and their bodies are probably still incredibly painful to live in, resulting in their aggression.

Do they scavenge for their supplies or simply buy them? both, also a big fan of trading. “whos fuckin idea was it to use bottlecaps of all the goddam-”

Are they the type to get distracted and go off to an unknown nearby location or do they stay on track? Stay on track, but very curious and enjoys exploring. will note locations to scavenge later if he cant get to them right away

How do they sleep? Are they picky about where and how or can they sleep basically anywhere? Max likes a tight, secure place to sleep. he’s usually between and wall and danse. if he feels like he’s in a fairly safe location, getting to sleep is easy, tho he startles awake rather easily and has night terrors. if someone tries to wake him suddenly, like with a loud noise or grabbing and shaking him, they are very likely to get hurt.

What’s their favorite radio station and song? (post-apocalypse) Atom bomb baby, uranium fever, and rocket 69

What’s their favorite post-apocalyptic food? Are they a picky eater? Do they know how to cook? favorite: sweets, candy, and mutfruit Not a picky eater, but he usually doesnt have much of an appetite either. He eats what hes given, usually without thinking about it or really tasting it He has a fair amount of knowledge and skill in the kitchen, being always at his mothers’ heels in everything domestic. he loves his parents and was always eager to help.

What’s their favorite beverage? Do they drink alcohol? he’s rather fond of quantum for the nastalgia and energy-drink buzz, enjoys alcohol, likes beer, will drink whatever hes handed, if given a choice he likes whisky and nuka cola.

Do they have any tag skills? --ill come back to this

Anything they like to collect? (ex. Unique weapons, Bobbleheads) comic books, magazines, any printed media toys and stuffed animals, fabric that feels nice.

Are they good at disarming traps or do they constantly miss them? always walking into them. if he does notice one before hand he’s pretty bad at disarming them, he usually just tries to set them off from a safe distance.

#max #massive text wall ahoy #fallout oc #fallout oc questionnaire

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carrot--cube · 8 years ago

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What I know about Chinchillas

Chinchillas, that creature that God made when he was trying to make an original species and mixed a Rabbit and a Squirrel, but to make it more special, he gave them the softest fur in the world.

Unfortunately, Chinchillas are usually described as “low mainteinance” pets, along with rabbits, hamsters, mice, rats and the like just because they are small and live in cages.

While, in reality, I’d categorize as “medium maintenance” pets. I mean, you dont have to wake up at 8am to give them a walk or be worried they are scratching your couch or plotting to murder you while you sleep, but they are far from boring and require a lot more of care than “refill water and food bowls once every week, clean cage once it starts to smell” Plus, they live for 10 years or more. So you’d better have that in mind before getting one.

For starters, the cage needs to be huge. More tall than wide, because they are jumpy and like to have many stories within their cage. This is because they are native to the Andes, in South America. So youd better have that in mind when giving them their cage and making its setup. Wich should be... A lot of stories, their food bowl, hay rack, water bottle, and a couple of hiding holes and small houses. From there, you can expand it as much as you want. Put some bridges! More platforms and perches! Boxes! Etc. Basically, if its non-toxic and cant give them problems when ingested, go for it. It’ll make a good enrichment. Or theyll give it a good 2 second sniff and forget about it forever.

And Wood. Cardboard. But most importantly; wood. Your cage can’t be finished without some good chews. It’s not just because they chew the cage bars and wont let you sleep. But they are rodents, that means their teeth are always growing, and if they cant chew they’d die. And i dont mean in they “#omg #im dead” kinda way. Since their teeth are always growing, they’ll eventually won’t be able to close their mouth and if they manage to survive for longer, their teeth can reach their skulls and break in to the eyes and brain.

Speaking of teeth, they have to be yellow-brownish, and no, they are not dirty, don’t worry about that. All rodents have colured teeth.

And speaking of body parts. Male chinchillas have extremely long penis. And they clean it regularly, they succ their own dik. All the way to the bottom. So unless you cant really explain your innocent child what a Penis is, don’t get a Male. Males may get hair rings in their peens, that are... well, hair rings around it, they are painful and very very bad, so if you notice anything wrong with the downparts of your Chin, take a look at it.

They also do better in pairs or in small herds of 3-4 individuals, but if you dont have a life and you have all the time in the world to try fill the social void of your chinchilla, you can try. But yeah, try to keep at least two in the same cage. Just dont introduce a new chinchilla to the one you have without a proper introduction or they’ll fight eachother. I am not experienced with introductions, but I am sure you can find a good guide or ask someone who has experience.

You want a cuddly pet? Chinchillas are not for you. They tolerate some soft petting, and love cheek and neck scritches, but they generally dont like to be held of hugged.

Since chinchillas are pretty energetic, they need to get out of their cage at least 30 minutes every day, personally, I spend from 30 minutes to 1 hour and a half every day with my Chin

Make sure the room is Chinchilla-proofed. And when you think you have it, check again.

These lil shits will jump, scutter and try to make trouble. They chew wires, leather purses, footwear, foam, paper, including wallpaper, cardboard, sometimes plastic and metal, too. I caught mine chewing the walls stucco after he ripped some of the wallpaper off. They are small, and most of their mass is fur, so they can fit in most holes and spaces in your room. Dont be deceived. Their fluff lies.

On top of that they will use any and everything to get to the higher ends of the room. Nice shelf you have there, mind if I jump on your shoulder, then on to your desk and THEN parkour my way to it in less than 2 seconds?

What about the bathroom? you ask. Be prepared for them to take a stroll on your sink and in to you bathtub or shower, don’t forget to close the toilet seat and keep all your cleaners and dangerous stuff off from their tiny paws, and then, check again.

They are born troublemakers.

Ok, play time is over. Now what? How do I make them come back to the cage?

There is a method I Call P&P. Patience and Peanuts.

Step 1 Keep your treats in a jar. And give them some of those treats every once in a while, for about the first week or two after you brough them in to your home. In this period of time they wont get play time. And if they are already used to playtime, sorry buds, you gotta learn this first.

They’ll eventually associate Noise of jar opening = Treats

Now you are good to go.

Step 2

Patience. The first play times may be longer than youd expect. Maybe 2 hours, maybe 3. Whys this? Chinchillas dont really like to be inside their tiny cage and would rather spend all their time in this new place they can jump, run and play. But, maybe sometimes, theyll return to their cage. Thats fine. Do not close the door.

They need to understand that just because they are inside the cage, you are not going to stop play time.

Wait for this to happen the more the better. If they dont run off as soon as you approach the cage, you can give them a treat through the bars, you want the door space free.

Once you are bored and a long time has passed, you chins feel they can go inside and out all they want, wait for them to step inside If you are in a super hurry, try to encourage them with treats or gentle hand movements.

Then, once inside, reward them, use this distraction to close the door.

Step 3

Repeat untill... well, a month of so.

Step 4

Now stand next to the spot you give them the treats and open the jar. You should now have your chins inside the cage ready to be given the treats. Close the door and reward.

Step 5 Youve successfully trained your chinchillas to come when called by the sound of a jar of treats.

Theres obviously more methods, but this is the one I use, mostly because it just developed naturally.

After playtime, they need to rest and do other chinchilla things. You? you have to clean after them. Chinchillas pee inside the cage usually in a set spot, but they poo everywhere. On your bed, on your chair, your desk, your everything where they have been. They are poo machines, they dont stink and they are hard, so they are not too gross, but its still poo, so... clean it, please.

Talking about personal hygene, Chinchillas need Dust/Sand baths At the very LEAST once a Week. two or three are preferred. And no, not normal sand nor dust will do, it has to be Chinchilla Dust or Chinchilla Sand because their skin is fragile and HAS to be specific for chinchillas. Yes or Yes.

Oh, ok, why don’t i leave the dust/sand inside the cage so they can bath whenever they want? Because:

A) If they bath too much, their skin will dry and will occasionate troublesome dermal illnesses

B) Sometimes they pee and poo in there. And they will roll in it. Ew.

Please dont leave the sand bath in.

They don’t usually spend a lot of time bathing, 10 minutes will be enough. Or... when they get bored. The Bathtub needs to be sturdy enough so when they roll, it wont get topped, thats it. Top cover for reduced sand spreading is optional, it works, but you will still get sand everywhere around your chin.

Also, beware, even if you put a little bit of sand or dust, it will go floof and up in to the air, and then, down in to your floor/clothing/whatever.

If you are allergic to dust or have respiratory issues wear a mask or something if your Chin likes to make a mess.

To clean the “bathtub” you can scoop the poop and the unusual pee with something and re-use the sand untill you notice it is getting clumped or dirty.

Alright, day one is over, you head to sleep. Its 5am. Dead quiet. The lights are off, you are in your sweetest dream, eating a pizza. And then, when you least expect it, Hell breaks loose, delivering to your ears, the roar of 100 demons. Adorable little demons

They are not dying, they are scared of... something. If you just got your Chin it’s most likely the new enviroment and all the new stuff. Mine has been with me for a year and something now and while he doesn’t bark as much, sometimes he gives me a small heart attack when I’m in bed. Once a month, maybe, they don’t do this often.

And finally, let me reiterate:

They are smarter than what you may think.

Don’t let them decieve you.

Those bug eyed, big eared, fluffy little creatures know what to do, and how to do so that they always win.

#Chinchilla #Chinchilla care #I wrote this sleep deprived so if there is something wrong plz tell me #i may have also missed stuff but uhhh brain is weird right now

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