#and usually am good at being gentle with myself
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dreamgirljune · 2 days ago
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i work with toddlers. each day is bright and funny and usually leaves me covered in glitter. and they help me see the world in a better light. whenever they snatch a toy from a friend, or throw something at me, or express their anger in some hurtful way, i like to sit with them. i tell them they were being mean to their friend. and i know they're not mean. so let's take a deep breath, and go give that friend a hug.
i've never been very good at loving myself. for every step forward into gentleness, i take three back into the cycle of self-deprecation. all the worst things i think about myself. i'm not as loving as i could be. i'm not as lovable as i should be. there has been a river of self-hatred running through me for as long as i can remember. i was 6 and cursing this supposed evil inside of me.
but there have been people in my life who have loved me well. i think of my sister, who has made every effort to help be kind to myself. if there is an evil rotting away at my core, it is not so big and not so wicked that it makes me impossible to love.
when it gets bad again, i start talking to myself like one of my kids. i remind myself i'm being mean to myself. and i don't want to be mean. so i need to take a deep breath, and hold onto the people who love me. i will hold my sister's hand until i am ready to hold my own. i will not let the sadness keep me from walking, sometimes crawling, into the light.
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wildmelon · 2 months ago
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oof. it's been a long time since i felt this depressed this many days in a row.
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caninecowboy · 2 years ago
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24 days!
#em#milo.txt#im thinking about em again. i mean when am i not they're always on my mind#god they make me so fucking happy#ive been having such a shitty past few weeks but talking to them has helped#it feels. incredibly magical to have a love as strong as ours#they called me a good boyfriend today and they just. get me yknow?#in ways no one has ever. in ways i didnt even expect! in ways that feel full of love#i love how we've become entangled in one another. it really feels like there's no true me without them and vice versa yknow?#like yeah yeah yeah im my own person. kickass grad student whos queer as fuck and hot and theyre their own person.#fucking amazing scientist beautifully radiant individual whos so kind and gentle and fuckn CUTE ((they sent me a selfie this morning#and i was like HEY GIVE A GUY A WARNING OKAY!!! I NEED MY BRAIN FOR SCHOOL! CANT BE TAKING MY BREATH AWAY LIKE THAT#AND RENDERING ME SPEECHLESS!! theyre sooooo cute. i see them and im like ohmygod youre so fucking... youre so pretty youre so cute youre so#hot youre literally every word that is escaping my mind right now and i have never seen something as breathtaking as them))#ANYWAY!!! it still feels like half of me is missing when they're not with me yknow? and its true#half of me IS missing... they are !! they're my other half they're my beloved they're my lavender they're my fucking bestie#it really sucks being this far from them and not having them in my life in person but soon! soon.#theyll be in the same city as me again and we'll go for drives and we'll go grocery shopping together#and get weird looks because we just. get so GOOFY together#godddd i love when we would try to forage for fucking food in [redacted] at like 10 pm but eVERYTHING CLOSES SO EARLY#like that time we went to taco bell and they only took cash so we had to pivot#god i just miss that shit!!!! i miss that with them !!! i miss laughing and being happy and having no worries and feeling. GOOD#i love that i can just look at them and they KNOW what i'm thinking like i dont even have to SAY anything and they KNOW#and how genuine they know me? god. they send me reeses and hi-chews in care packages and its the ONLY time i have them bc i dont usually#buy shit for myself like that PLUS it feels like an extra special treat when i get them from them.#also the way they have helped me love myself? like fuck.#if they're capable of loving me so deeply and truly. maybe i can too yknow?#ill do things that i wouldnt have done before knowing them (like admitting i DO know things and celebrating my 48% on an exam and eating#ice cream because its going to make me happy even though theres still remnants telling me to not)#like.... they really have changed my life for the better
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amazinglyashy · 15 days ago
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Too heavy for me? Never
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LADS men reaction to you only somewhat joking about being too heavy for them
Sylus -
He'll raise an eyebrow at you, staring down at you as you realize the joke fell flat. You try to back peddle, not wanting to cause any confrontation that never helps you feel better about your body anyway, but he simply holds up a hand to stop you with a shake of his head.
"I don't want to hear it, sweetie. I already know the nonsense you're going to say. How about you just come with me right now to the gym instead?"
You don't know how to tell him that saying that truly shattered your heart into a million pieces, so you just follow him in silence instead. You didn't think he would insult you so casually, and you were now trying to brace yourself for the inadequate feelings and self-loathing you were about to experience by having to train at the gym with him.
But... he didn't ask you to do a workout. He didn't tell you to get on a piece of equipment or to lie down on a mat for a physical exercise.
He told you to sit on a small bench against the wall while he went to the free weights close by.
Wordlessly, he loads weights- two- no, three times your weight onto the bar, before moving to lift it. Once. Twice. Again, and again and again-
His eyes flicker over to you at some point, and instead of making any remark or reference to the emotions clear across your face, he flashes you a slight smirk, just like he always does.
"Have I made myself clear, sweetie?"
Zayne -
Zayne will definitely think you're just pretending to be stupid at first.
He will look down at you with his brows furrowed and a small smile creeping on his lips, thinking it's all a joke.
"I lift myself during my workouts fairly easily, and I am capable of lifting a lot more. Quite funny, though I wouldn't make this form of humor a habit. It isn't particularly good for your mental health."
Then he realizes you're actually being serious in what you're saying.
He's upset, to put it lightly, but hes trying not to let it show. Favoring a small frown across his usually firm expression as he studies your face. Your heart will jolt just a little bit when you process just how sad his eyes look though... obviously he's hurt that you would even think something like that about yourself, much less come to believe it as true.
"Allowing a part of your brain to lie to you is not healthy if you don't push back with the truth. And the truth here, is that you are nowhere near too heavy for me to lift or carrying, even for prolonged periods of time. To demonstrate-"
And like it's nothing, he's picking you up and carrying you. His destination is not important, and the protests spewing from your lips fall on deaf ears as you try to gentle squirm out of his grasp. He'll continue to explain why your viewpoint is flawed, methodically and with logic, and in a way that you find yourself unable to argue back.
He doesn't want you to.
He knows you're wrong, and he will stop at nothing to prove it.
Xavier -
He's more surprised at the statement than anything. At first, he thinks you're making a jab at his strength, and wonders if he slipped up in front of one too many Wanderers and now needs to prove himself just to get you to stop teasing him for being 'weak'.
Once he (quickly) realizes that you're talking about yourself, jabbing at your own body and state, rather than at him, it's like a spark igniting in him.
"What? What would ever make you think that? No- that's not right. That's not right at all."
He's immediately going to try and grab you to lift you up, he doesn't care where you both are or what you're doing. Even if you've just woken up in bed and are still relaxing, he's trying to pick you up right then and there.
He stumbles trying to lift you, falling backward onto the pile of blankets and plushies that has taken over his bed. He feels awful, worried that you'll take his misstep as him falling over from your weight, immediately apologizing and trying to sit up and pick you up again before falling forward from the plush surface he's trying to rise on giving out too much beneath him.
You're both a giggling mess by then, and it's obvious to you that he's going to keep trying to prove it to you, just... a bit clumsily so. Several more attempts will be made as the evening goes on, and pretty soon he's showing you just how easily it is for him to lift you up- especially if he keeps doing it over and over and over again.
And he will continue to do it over and over and over again, even after today. As many times as it takes.
Rafayel -
You definitely made a mistake saying anything self-depreciating around him. Especially with how much he likes to prove you wrong in playful situations, this is something similar, but a lot more serious to him.
He'll make fun of you for anything, as long as you know he's just being lighthearted even if he's grumpy or upset when he fires a quip off at you.
But the second you agree with him, or say something bad about yourself- whether jokingly or dead serious- the gloves are off. He won't accept that from you, and he's already on it to figure out how to turn the opinion you've formed of yourself on it's head and into a more positive outlook.
Lifts you up bridal carry while spinning- quite literally sweeping you off your feet while he whisks you away. You would think you were a princess with how he spins around his studio with you in his arms, with no regard to the paintings or projects around him as he dances with you in his arms. And no matter how hard you protest, he doesn't stop until he feels for himself that he's done enough, giggling the entire time.
"Are you really going to doubt a sea god's strength? Geez, I didn't realize you were such a rude human."
He'll hold you up enough to press his forehead against yours, nuzzling against you with a smile, the slightest sadness playing across his expression.
"Man, I must be pretty lousy that you would ever think something like that about yourself. That must mean I don't think to pick you up enough like you deserve. Don't worry, I'll make it up to you by whisking you away every chance I see you from now on."
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natsaffection · 4 months ago
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Hiii!
The wandanat fic was so hot and sweet!! It made me think, how about another session where R is calling red and then the aftermath of it?
Bond. | Wandanat
Natasha x Reader x Wanda
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Warnings: 18+! MINORS DNI! Threesome, Safeword use!
Word Count: 473
A/N: Was a bit of a challenge not gonna lie..🫶🏼 I am in a bondage relationship myself, and fun fact, most of my stories are based on my experience, lol. But my girlfriend (who is 40 btw, I won the lottery) always says it's important to say immediately if even the smallest thing is wrong, so that it doesn't even come to the safe word..so I hope that it works out here✨
The soft glow of candlelight cast a warm ambiance around the room as Natasha and Wanda moved with a practiced rhythm. Their touches were a blend of tenderness and command, driving you to your limits. Tonight, the intensity was higher than usual, and you felt yourself being pushed closer to the edge.
Despite your desire to endure for their sake, your body and mind screamed for relief. You didn’t want to disappoint them, but you knew you couldn’t continue.
“R-Red..!” you gasped, your voice cracking with exhaustion. “Red, please...”
Natasha and Wanda immediately halted, their eyes wide with concern. Natasha cupped your face, her thumbs gently wiping away the tears that had begun to fall. “Hey, hey, it’s okay,” she whispered softly. “It’s done, We’re right here.”
“Can I hug you?” As you nod your head, Wanda wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. “We’ve got you, love. Just breathe,” she murmured, her voice filled with empathy and reassurance. “I’m proud of you for calling out, you did so good!”
But you couldn’t stop the flood of emotions that overtook you. You buried your face in Wanda’s shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably. “I’m..I'm sorry,” you cried. “I didn’t want to stop. I didn’t want to let you down..”
Natasha’s heart ached at the sight of your distress. She pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. “ Y/n, no, don't you dare apologize," Natasha replied firmly, her tone leaving no room for doubt. "You did exactly what you should have. You used your safeword. That's what it's there for.“ she said, her voice breaking with emotion. “You didn’t let us down, not even close.”
Your tears flowed freely now, a mix of relief and guilt washing over you. “But..I wanted to be strong for you,” you admitted, your voice trembling. “I didn’t want to disappoint you..”
Natasha’s expression softened, and she leaned in to kiss your tear-streaked cheek. “You are strong, moya lyubov,” she said gently. “Recognizing your limit and speaking up takes incredible strength. We’re so proud of you.”
You took a shaky breath, feeling the weight of their words sink in. You closed your eyes, leaning into their comforting presence. “Thank you,” you whispered. “Thank you for understanding.”
Natasha wrapped a blanket around you, cocooning you in warmth. “Always, Detka,” she murmured. “We’re here for you.”
Wanda tightened her embrace, her own tears falling now. “We love you,” she said softly. “More than anything.”
You felt their love and regret in every word, their genuine sorrow for pushing you too hard filling you with a sense of deep security. “I love you both,” you whispered, your voice filled with emotion. “More than words can say..”
Natasha and Wanda each pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, their hearts swelling with affection and regret. “We love you too,” Natasha said softly. “Now and always.”
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ln4bub · 1 year ago
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59+Oscar. I was thinking they just had (vanilla) sex and as they’re lying in bed she says this and he’s immediately like, aight bet.
(Also this was the anon who sent in the 7 minutes in heaven one, thought I’d un anon myself, lol)
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I am dropping everything to write this request immediately, you are an oscar piastri smut genius. I altered the prompt ever so slightly to match the reader's vibe but enjoy <3
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Your relationship with Oscar was relatively new, the two of you still getting to know each other's bodies. Oscar had always been quite a shy person, never really expressing much beyond a smile and a nod in interviews. With you he was different, soft and loving, very affectionate; something that translated into the bedroom. Hands held, missionary, forehead kisses - always very gentle.
Don't get it wrong, Oscar was a gentleman, always making sure you finished first, but there was only so much you could take before wanting to switch it up. Your head is currently lead on Oscar's hard chest, his arms wrapped around you as he breathes deeply. "You okay baby? You've been quiet since we finished." He questions, stroking his thumb up and down your arm.
"'m just thinking." You mumble, tilting your head to look at him.
"What about?" He asks, slight concern etched onto his features. You sigh, sitting up, "Do you ever want to try something different?" You ask. His eyebrows furrow, lips jutting out in a pout, "Different?" He questions.
"Like, don't take it the wrong way, that sex was good, it was so good. But next time, could you maybe do it harder?" You murmur shyly, avoiding eye contact with the Australian.
"Harder?" He asks, curiosity taking over. He pulls you into him, now straddling his waist, his hands resting on your hips. "Is that what you want? You want me to fuck you harder?" He questions, voice dropping with lust, his lips skating over your pulse point. "Want me to hold you down and fuck you like a whore?" He whispers in your ear, capturing your earlobe between his teeth, making you whine.
Your legs squeeze around his hips, yours beginning to grind lightly as he lays kisses over your neck. His pillowy lips suck against your pulse point, tongue laving over the red mark he left behind. His bite is slightly harder than usual, causing your nails to dig in to the flesh of his shoulders. He moans against you at the sting, turning you around and bending you over.
“Still dripping from the last time we fucked and my girl is just aching for my cock isn’t she?” He teases, watching the way you clench around nothing. He slips two fingers inside you, curling them down to press against your g-spot. Your knees almost give out with the pleasure but he’s quick to remind you that this was what you wanted.
Oscar positions himself behind you before sliding his cock inside you, groaning at your tightness. You moan out at the feeling of being stuffed full, your head drooping. Oscar’s hand loops your hair into a ponytail around his fist, pulling your hair back before he slams himself in and out of you.
“My girl’s taking me so well ay, is this what you wanted? Wanted to be fucked so hard your pretty little ass turns red?” He asks, his free hand coming down to hit you. You scream out his name, your walls providing a vice-like grip.
“There we go, that’s it, such a good girl for me. If I’d known this was how you liked to be fucked I would’ve had you cock drunk like this much sooner. Would’ve had those beautiful eyes crying for my dick.” He groans, pulling your hair tighter as he fucks you harder, faster.
“Oh god Oscar, please don’t stop, ‘m gonna cum.” You whimper, your legs slowly sliding down the mattress until you’re practically led on your stomach.
“Wanna feel you cum, wanna feel how good I make my perfect girl feel. Come on baby.” Oscar begins guiding you to your orgasm, gentle kisses to your neck contrasting the brutal pace of his hips. He feels your walls tightening further, your back arching into him. The moan of his name you let out is enough to send him over the edge, his cum filling you up.
He slides his cock out of your pussy, spreading your legs to watch the way his cum leaks out. Two fingers find the apex of your thighs, swiping through the combination of your juices before running over your lips. You open your mouth, eagerly taking in his thick fingers and he smiles, eyes beaming.
A gentle kiss to the forehead and a whispered promise of a bath is all it takes for you to fall asleep happy, dreaming of the escapades you and Oscar can now enjoy.
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katiascraft · 22 days ago
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“am I too much for you? maybe I’m too much for everyone” | CL16
parings: Charles Leclerc x insecure!reader
summary: you feel insecure and you’re struggling but Charles makes sure you know how important you are to the world (specially his world).
now playing: “If I weren’t me” by Katherine Li
warnings: not English native speaker could there be errors. None proofread. Talk about sadness and destructive inner talk. Insecure reader. Readers pov’s.
words: +1,5k words.
a/n: heyyyy I am back!!! I disappeared for a year 💀 consistency it’s not my thing I guess. I’m finally finishing university this year!! So I guess I’ll have more time to write. Hope you like it! First on Charles. New obsession: F1 drivers. Get ready I got plenty more on my plans :p. Remember to like or reblog! And follow me so we can be friends :3
MASTERLIST
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The piano tiles made the sound of the soundtrack of my sadness in this moment. My fingers touched them softly like they were fragile - like me.
Today was a nightmare from the start. Since I woke up I had a knot in my stomach that became bigger and bigger as the time passed through my routine. Sometimes itʼs really hard for me to do daily tasks such as cleaning or even eating. And it was harder if I need to go to events or meetings.
I have episodes of deep sadness Iʼve been treating on therapy. Sometimes I just canʼt control it. Today was one of those days where black and grey took over everything I felt and did. One way I found by being suggested by my therapist was writing down every thought of pain to find kind of a relief. Today itʼs really hard. Iʼm struggling really hard.
Iʼve been alone the whole day. Charles had to go to the Ferrari factory and do his driver tasks as usual. When I woke up he was gone. And maybe that contributed even more to my desperate and pathetic situation. Though I shouldnʼt talk about it like that and be more gentle with myself. It always felt to me negativity has always been my best friend and worst enemy at the same time.
Playing piano helped me so much. Write a song about my pain. Try to give a little light to all of this mess I find myself emerged in. Itʼs really hard for me to open up and seek help when I need it. Specially when it comes to Charles. I donʼt wanna be a burden to him. And I donʼt wanna stress him out with all of my dark side. I always try to brush it off when heʼs around. Most times I just pretend Iʼm happy and everything itʼs alright. As if I wasnʼt feeling too much for him. Or too less. Like Iʼm not worth of his love. Of his attention. Of his smiles. Of everything he did for me.
The fact that Charles asked me out had me shocked. Iʼve never felt like I could compete with all the models and influencers and singers and every really beautiful girl in this world. Iʼve never felt beautiful nor attractive. Yes Iʼm pretty good making jokes. And I talk too much. But Iʼve always felt I cringed people out. Dating people wasnʼt a thing I was really good at. Actually I sucked. And I think I still do. Always overthinking and second guessing every move. Every promise. Everything.
Charles was so sweet to me. He said “youʼre beautiful. Iʼm sure people tell you all the time. But you really areˮ. I couldnʼt help but get really nervous and blush. The most beautiful man Iʼve ever seen was talking to me and saying all of that. I blinked a couple of times. My smile huge. I just laughed softly trying to brush it off.
Since then we became a team. Inseparable. Charles became my best friend. My rock. I donʼt know what I ever did to deserve his love. The way he loved me was so gentle. So caring and loving. At first was hard because his love language was physical touch and that was something I wasnʼt used to. But little by little I got used to and felt amazing. Iʼve never felt so comfortable with anyone but him.
I hate my body. I feel ashamed of my personality. Most times I feel so dumb. So stupid.
I didnʼt realized I was already crying when I felt my tears dropping in my hands on the piano. I didnʼt realized I kept playing in auto-mode. When I was conscious again I started crying badly. I started shaking. I felt so bad. So guilty for even feeling this way. I didnʼt realized Charles have arrived home when I felt his deep voice from behind.
“Baby... whatʼs wrong? Youʼve been crying for a whileˮ I heard his voice and that sent shivers down my spine. I try to hold it together because I feel so embarrassed heʼs seeing me like this.
He sat next to me and hugged me. I hid my face on his neck feeling contempt. Thing is I started crying worse. I couldnʼt control it once it took on me.
“Itʼs okay baby. Itʼs okay.ˮ He whispered on my head while he stroke my hair and my arm pulling me closer. I thanked him mentally for this. I never thought I needed it so much.
Took a while until I calmed myself in his body. I part from him slowly and whipped my face with my hands. After I did he did the same. He whipped my tears so gently. He did the same looking me with bright eyes. Worry was all over his face. I licked my lips. “Iʼm sorry.ˮ I said quietly almost a whisper.
He denided with his head taking my head into his hands and stroked it softly.
“donʼt be sorry baby. Iʼm worried. Whatʼs wrong? Iʼm sorry I wasnʼt home to be with you. Why didnʼt you called me?ˮ I could feel the worry in his voice deep and cracking.
“I didnʼt want to bother to be honest. Itʼs one of those days. A really hard dayˮ my tears wanted to go out again but I holded them.
I saw his eyes turned into a sad look. He leaned on me and kissed my cheek to hugged me strongly in his arms afterwards. I buried my head in his shoulder. His smell calmed me down. I holded him pretty close to me. Strongly as him. I didnʼt want to let go.
“do you wanna talk about what you are feeling love?ˮ He whispered softly. I swallowed hard and pulled away from his so I could look into his beautiful eyes. I loved his eyes. So bright so blue sometimes. To me they felt like staring at the ocean. I stroked his face gently. He grabbed my legs on the little couch in front of the piano it our living room.
“This is one of those days where I donʼt feel enough or maybe too much to handle... all of this darkness in me that sometimes I just canʼt control it. You deserve someone confident and happy just like youˮ I told him softly and honestly. And it felt good to take it out of me for finally. I wanted to cry again but I was making my best efforts to keep it together.
“Cher... you are more than enough for me. You are the most beautiful soul Iʼve ever met. The most beautiful woman Iʼve ever seen. You are the sweetest most caring and fun person. Always there for people. You have the brightest personality. Every time you enter a room you shine. Everyone smiles. To me youʼre happiness though I know that isnʼt the whole you. Youʼre human baby. You are allowed to feel. And to not be okay. And to be okay too. You are not a burden for me. Youʼre my best friend. Mon amour. My future wife. The one whoʼs always there for me. My shoulder to cry on. The one with the greatest jokes. The life of every party I assist. You give a meaning to my life. A reason to live. You are a great daughter. The best friend someone could ask for. The greatest sister. You are a light for every single person that knows you y/n. Donʼt ever feel that you are too much to handle. And I really wanna go and kill the people who made you ever feel you were, I sware. You are amazing baby.ˮ While he was talking you couldnʼt hold it together. You just started crying. He let you do it while he whipped your tears lovingly. He seeing you like this broke his heart. You didnʼt deserve to feel like this. And he wished he could take away all of your pain. That you could see yourself the way he sees you. And feel how happy and enamoured you made him feel. “You can talk to me every time you need itˮ he continued. “you can trust me and we can figure it out together. You donʼt have to go through it alone. Okay? I love you with everything I am y/n. If I could I would take all of this pain away and just make you feel how I feel about you. I promise to me youʼre even better than Carlosˮ he said lastly jokingly making me laugh through my crying.
Now he had a huge smile on his face knowing he could make you feel better. I gave him a peck on his lips as a thank you and as an I love you.
“I donʼt know what I would do without you Charles...ˮ I said sincerely and full of love in between the lines. He gave another kiss back but now it was deeper in feelings. We kissed for a while and it felt that as the kiss continued my pain was going away feeling better every second. After the kissed I hugged him tightly. He gave kisses to my neck making me giggle a little. “I love you Charlie. Youʼre my angelˮ I whispered on his shoulder and he tightened the hug in response.
“And you are mine chérie“ he said burying his face on my shoulder.
——————————————————————————————
Charlie won COTA 🥹.
Hope you liked it 💌 if you have ideas my inbox is open for requests!
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hayakawalove · 7 months ago
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A Spoonful of Medicine
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Summary: After recovering from a brief bout of illness, you find yourself craving sex. Of course Satoru and Suguru come to your rescue.
A/N: I would definitely try to get myself to be sick so they could take care of me. Also cause I want them to fuck me but that's not the point.
CW: Smut, Polyamory, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Sick, Vaginal Sex, Cunnilingus, Grinding, Hand Jobs, Spit Kink, Praise Kink, Dirty Talk, Top Suguru, Switch Gojo, Creampie, Fem Reader, AFAB Reader
W/C: 4,018
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Soft. 
Soft fabric greets your skin as your body rouses awake. You were certain that you were laying on clouds among the gods until your eyes open. Your room fills your vision, your eyes slowly coming into focus. 
You check the bedside clock, the time being 11:00 am. 
Fuck. 
You had slept for 13 hours. 
You turn back to look at the ceiling, slowly waking up fully. Trying to recollect memories from the previous night you find yourself coming up empty handed. The farthest you got were bits and pieces of Suguru and Satoru, their warm hands gentle as they cradled you while you drifted in and out of consciousness. While your brain tries to gather the pieces together, a soft scent floats over to you, a mix of meat and spices. 
Wait. 
You can smell? 
It had been days since your nose worked, but now it felt suddenly clear, the scents of the room overwhelming you. You were able to smell Satoru’s cologne on the tshirt you wore, along with the detergent of the sheets below you. In addition to that, you were able to smell something coming from the kitchen. 
Suguru must be cooking. 
Where was Satoru? 
You had been sick for the past four days, nearly bedridden with a cold that hit you like a freight train. The two boys had been at your beck and call the entire time. You almost felt smothered by the amount of love they poured into you. It felt good though, to be cared for. 
You sit up and throw your legs off the side of the bed while stretching them, your joints cracking as you shake off the nearly day long slumber. Turning to the nightstand, you grab the thermometer that Suguru had left. With a beep you shove the stick in your mouth, pulling it out when the time is up. 99 F. No fever. You didn't feel sick. In fact, you felt refreshed. Better than you have in a long time. 
You crumble up the front of your shirt, bringing it up to your face. Several large whiffs later you feel your head swoon. It had been days since you were able to smell him. 
He preferred to wear woody colognes, the addicting cedar scent covering you entirely. 
Satoru comes in wearing a face mask, holding medicine in his hands. 
“Wake up bunny, it’s time for your next-“ he slides in the room, looking at you. 
“You’re up.” 
“I’m up.” 
He walks over to you, inspecting your face. 
“You don’t sound like a 70 year old smoker anymore.” 
“And you still sound like an idiot.” 
Satoru chuckles at your feistiness. He missed it. He knew to start getting worried about you when you didn’t bite back. 
Satoru sets the medicine on the bedside table. Now that he was up close, you were able to get a good look at him. He looked good. He usually did. Okay, he always did. His white hair was fluffy, with bright blue eyes poking out above the mask. He was wearing a black shirt and boxers. Fuck, he looked… 
“Hello?” Satoru’s bending over, waving in front of your face. 
You get even more flustered once he’s up close. The smell of his shampoo and body wash, an intoxicating mix, over flows your senses. You weren’t freezing from a fever anymore. No, you were hot. Undoubtedly, earnestly, hot. It was almost hard to breathe under the heat of his gaze. 
He lifts up a hand and grabs your chin, long fingers splaying on the side of your face. He tilts your head side to side, inspecting something, before facing you forward again. Your stomach burns with need, fingers tingling at the close proximity. You had been so sick you almost forgot what it felt like to be anything but ill. Even if you could forget it, your body hardly did. A familiar sensation builds up between your legs as your eyes lock with Satoru’s. 
Something comes over you, and you’re ripping off his mask. 
His eyebrows shoot up in surprise but he doesn’t have time to ask you what you’re doing as your lips are on his in an instant. You hold his shoulders tight, your lips melding to his. If you could fuse with him, you would. Satoru hums against your lips before pulling away, looking deep into your eyes. 
“What, are you trying to infect me? That’s low, even for you.” 
“Want you.” Your voice comes out soft. 
Satoru audibly swallows, face flashing as if he’s considering it. 
He always did give in faster than Suguru. 
“You need to rest.” 
“No, I need you.” 
It’s hard to not pick up on the desperation in your voice. If it were any other time, Satoru might make fun of you. He couldn’t bring himself to make a quip this time though. Not with the way your eyes dragged across his body, your mouth twisting and turning. 
Your pussy tingles, your body finally catching up to four days without sex. Yeah sure you were hungry and thirsty, but more than that you were horny. 
Satoru wets his bottom lip, stepping closer. His lifts his knee between your legs, towering over you. He was even more beautiful up close. 
“Yeah? Careful what you wish for, bunny.” 
You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down. Lips lock and tongues dance. He tastes like cereal, sugary goodness embedded in the plush of his lips. You move backward, allowing him more space. His body inches closer to yours as he crawls on the bed, his large body covering yours. Even though there are only centimeters between you two, you make up your mind that he isn’t close enough. Satoru is pliable, body easy to move as you throw him on his back, crawling on top of him. There’s a hunger deep in his eyes as he watches you take control. Your chest heaves as you stare down at him, not knowing where to start but knowing you needed to begin somewhere. 
You smash your lips against his, anticipation pouring from you. It had been days since you touched him, days since you tasted him. The second he opens his mouth, your tongue curls against his. You groan in response to the flavor of his spit. He feels like heaven beneath you, his muscles perfectly molding against yours. You grind your hips, searching for some sort of friction and his cock begins to harden underneath you. Satoru’s hands take hold of your hips, easily gliding you back and forth over him. 
Satoru didn’t think you were sick anymore, but even if you were he wouldn’t care. 
Each time the pressure of his cock nudges your clit, you let out a moan. There were layers of fabric between you two, but it almost didn’t matter. Your entire body was overtly sensitive, your skin tingling with excitement. You buck your hips back forth over him while your tongue explores his mouth. Satoru lets out soft grunts whenever your lips parts from his. 
You don’t pay any mind to the door creaking open, much rather focusing on the man below you. 
Suguru walks in the room with a tray of food in his hands, his long hair flowing down his back. 
“Is that your way of getting her to take her medicine? I guess that makes sense for you Satoru.” 
Satoru tries to pull away to bite back a smart remark but you aren’t having it, chasing after his lips with yours. 
Suguru walks in the room, setting the tray of food on the beside table. He didn’t feel like he was interrupting anything, so he made no move to rush out. If anything he was curious. Last night you could barely get up to go to the bathroom and now you were devouring Satoru. Above all else, he wanted to make sure you weren’t pushing yourself. 
The presence of Suguru didn’t deter you at all. You only had the man below you on your mind. Lips lock as you move your hips faster, the pleasure beginning to build in the pit of your stomach. 
Suguru slowly walks around the end of the bed, choosing to sit at the edge next to Satoru’s head. 
He speaks your name in a reprimanding tone, eyes narrowed in on your head. You whimper against Satoru, refusing to part from him until Suguru says your name again. 
It forces you out of your stupor, making you raise your head up to him. He looks weary, his eyes hollow with dull hair. Suguru hadn’t been sleeping much this past week. He wanted to be awake in case you needed anything. It was so very him. A pang of tenderness shoots through your heart at the sight of your other boyfriend. They were wearing themselves thin taking care of you. But all you could focus on was taking more. Your lungs pant as you look at him. 
“What do you think you’re doing?” A stupid question at best, he knows what you’re doing. 
Your teeth dig in your bottom lip while you try to move against Satoru again. 
“You’re sick.” The way he says it makes it sound like it’s the end of the conversation. 
“No I’m not, I feel okay.” Your voice catches him by surprise. 
You did sound better. 
He lifts a hand up and places it against your forehead, trying to check for any signs that you were still burning up. 
“Do you?” 
“Mhm.” You fidget beneath his watchful gaze. 
The way he was looking at you made you to feel so exposed. Like a live wire laying next to a puddle of water. 
“Alright I guess, as long as you don’t get Satoru sick too. I can’t handle two sickly babies.” 
It’s an attempt at a joke, one that would normally get you. You’re too needy to laugh, instead choosing to resume ministrations on Satoru. You press down until you feel his cock against you again. The pressure against your clit forces a moan from your throat. He felt so fucking good beneath you. You bury your face against Satoru’s neck, your breaths coming out in quick succession. Suguru places his hand on your head, stroking your hair while you rub against Satoru. He couldn’t keep his hands to himself. It was instinctual really, to keep his hands on you at all times. Satoru was the same way. Goosebumps crawl over Satoru as he feels your breaths against his skin. 
Your body moves faster, your moans sounding more salacious. Up and down. Up and down. You slide your pussy against Satoru, setting the perfect pace. Satoru’s hard cock presses against your nub, your soaked underwear clinging to you. 
More, just a little more… 
Satoru holds your waist, his long fingers digging into your tender skin as he drags you back and forth. It was almost embarrassing how fast you were able to make his cock hard. Honestly, he didn’t know how much longer he would last with the way you were going. Your whimpering floats over to his ears, immediately breaking any cogs that might have been working in his head. 
It doesn’t take long until you’re pushed over the edge, reaching a breaking point as you cum fully clothed rubbing against his cock. Your movements still while the noise dies down. 
“Did you just cum?” Suguru asks, disbelief highlighting in his tone. 
The boys know exactly what you sound like when you cum, they were just surprised as it had never happened so fast before. 
You nuzzle further into Satoru’s neck, trying to soak up his warmth. You groan against his skin, feeling the aftershocks rush through your body. 
“Felt good.” 
Your words are almost inaudible against him. Pushing yourself up on your hands you stare down at Satoru. His cheeks are flushed, eyes blown out. 
“Get on my face.” Satoru says, his words breathless and almost pained. 
You mean to question him, but there’s no room for debate, not with the way his eyes are trained on you.  
You shimmy off his body, swiping your clothes off. Even though you just came, your body was still hot, lust burning your skin as each second passed by. Suguru watches as you crawl on top of Satoru’s face, sticky cum covering your pussy. So swollen and needy, Suguru could feel his mouth start to water. Satoru sticks his tongue out and pushes it through your slit, relishing in the moan you let out. 
Suguru’s eyes are hazy when you look at him, desire pooling in the depths of his caramel gaze. Your pussy clenches when you meet his eyes. Satoru definitely noticed, as he lets out a groan into you. You look down and see Suguru’s cock beginning to harden in his pants. Fumbling with the zipper, you slide his cock out. 
Beautiful, every part of him was beautiful. 
It’s hard in your hand, drops of precum pouring from the tip. You wrap your hand around him, sliding down his cock. Suguru shudders at the motion, his abs tightening. He and Satoru didn’t get up to anything while you were sick as they were too busy doting on you. 
He didn’t realize how much he needed this until it was actually happening. 
Euphoria washes over him as your hand slides along his cock. He throws his head back with his eyes closed, enjoying how your skin feels against his. He loved Satoru’s skin and hands as well, but there was something different about the softness in your palms. He lowers his head and spits on his cock, body tensing once your hand pushes the spit down. 
“Just like that baby.” Suguru coos, lips barely parted as he stares down at your fist. 
You whimper, watching as Suguru’s spit covers his cock. It’s a filthy sight, the way his saliva spreads around. Heat rushes to your core as Satoru swipes his tongue through you. When you came in your pants, Satoru really had no other choice but to clean you up. His large fingers press into the soft skin of your thighs, leaving you no room to squirm around. His tongue grazes against your clit, forcing you back down when you try to jump away from the contact. Normally he would chuckle at your sensitivity. But he was incredibly serious right now. You started all this, so you were going to take it. 
Suguru groans softly as your hand glides against his cock, he was hard as a rock as your hand tightens around him. He really wanted you to rest all day today but fuck, he couldn’t complain with the way your fingers swiped his tip. 
You did seem better, he reminds himself. 
“Satoru, I can’t take it.” You murmur, his tongue dragging out a slew of moans from you. 
“Don’t focus on him baby, focus on me.” Suguru asks, trying to keep his composure. 
He tilts your chin to look at him, staring deep into your eyes while your hand strokes him. You had been with the two men for years, and been in love with them for even longer, so why did the intensity of Suguru’s gaze knock you off your feet every time? You dig your teeth into your bottom lip while letting out a whine, the suction on Satoru’s mouth only increasing as time passes. 
Suguru watches your face morph from pain to pleasure and back over, and he briefly thinks about asking Satoru to slow down. He doesn’t though, he would never admit it but he secretly gets off on the cruelty they show you. He likes the way you push them away, only to be begging for more moments later. 
Satoru isn’t prim and proper as he eats you out. Your room is filled with the sounds of his mouth laving your pussy, the noise embarrassing you. 
“So fucking noisy Satoru.” Suguru murmurs, reaching a thumb up to glide across your bottom lip. 
You grind your hips harder against Satoru’s tongue, letting out a moan once his lips wrap around your clit. 
“Does it feel good, baby?” Suguru speaks lowly, hypnotized with the way you were using Satoru. 
“Yes, fuck, yes.” 
Suguru hums at your answer, clenching his teeth while you rub his cock. 
“Think you’re ready for more?” 
You’re at a loss for words so all you can do is nod, very desperately. Suguru cracks a grin before deciding he can’t wait any longer, standing up and moving you off Satoru’s face. Satoru looks delirious under you, your cum smearing across his lips and cheeks. He looks like he wants to complain, but he keeps his mouth shut. Whatever Suguru says, goes, and Satoru is aware of that. 
Suguru lays you down on the bed, spreading your legs so wide it almost borders on painful. He slides in between your legs, giving you no time to catch your breath while he rubs his cock down your pussy. 
“You scared us princess.” He murmurs, pushing his cock inside you. 
Your eyes roll back in your head as you feel him stretch you out. 
Suguru’s face pinches as he bottoms out, your pussy giving him little to no room to move. You hadn’t been sick for that long, but it felt like it. His cock had begun to forget the shape of your walls. It seemed you did too, your pussy stretching far more slowly than normal. But that didn’t matter, he would mold you once more. 
Satoru pouts behind Suguru, briefly appreciating his form before scooting up beside you. He slides his clothes off and grabs your hand, guiding it towards his hard cock. 
Your body moves on impulse as you squeeze him, thoughtlessly guiding your hand up and down his cock. The both of you look like a wreck, while Suguru looks like he’s only getting started. 
Suguru watches the minuscule changes in your expression as he pulls out, before slamming himself back in. The moan you let out is pornographic. He almost blames you for how fucked you’re gonna get because honestly you gave him no choice looking and sounding like that. 
Your eyes feel droopy, but you refuse to shut them. The sight of the two men before you makes your mind run, your body already so close to cumming. 
Satoru, his head rung low, bangs obscuring his beautiful eyes as you pump his cock. His stomach tightening each time your fingers reach his tip before gliding back down. 
Suguru, whose face was the definition of sinful in the way he watched you, pressing his cock deep inside your pussy. 
It’s almost impossible to divide your attention between the two. Each time you slow down on Satoru, he lets out a begging shaking breath, but whenever you lose focus on Suguru he’s fucking into you faster. 
It’s like they were competing for your attention. 
Suguru grips your other hand and brings it to his mouth, pushing your fingers past his lips so he can suck them. The feeling only increases your sensitivity, making your moans come out louder. 
He pulls them out and you throw your head back when you notice the saliva dripping from your fingers. He was so fucking hot, and he didn’t even try. He guides them to your pussy, resting them against your clit. Your pussy was soaked already between your cum and Satoru’s spit, but that didn’t matter. You would gladly accept whatever Suguru gave you. You try to circle your clit, but you can’t. Not at the pace that would get you off. 
Suguru slams into you, tilting your hips in a way that makes his cock rub against your gspot. He notices that you’re having a hard time focusing on rubbing your clit so he slows down, pulling his cock out before pressing it back in.
Cute, he thought. Your poor little head could hardly focus on everything at once. 
Your legs trap his hips in, fingers starting to move faster. Both men have their eyes on you as you moan, body contorting as you inch closer to the high. 
Fingers skip along your clit as you feel yourself clench around Suguru. Desperate moans fall from your lips as your vision goes dark. It comes on suddenly, your body shaking beneath Suguru as you cum. They let out moans watching you, their bodies reacting to the way you sound. 
It hits Suguru harder than it hits Satoru. He can feel the way your pussy clings to him, the way your body trembles beneath his large frame. There’s no reason to take it easy on you anymore so he starts fucking into you more at a rough pace. His cock pounds inside you, teetering between pleasure and pain. Your hand flies up to grip his chest, fingers slippery from your cum. 
“Come on baby you can take it.” He finds himself saying, noticing the way you try to back off. 
“No I- it’s too much, it’s too much.” You plea, his cock penetrating you. 
He loves how pathetic you sound. 
Your pussy clings to his cock as his hips slow down, his cock jumping as he cums inside you. It almost feels like he’s suffocating with the way you grip him. He stills completely, relaxing in content. It felt like a weight was lifted off his chest when he came. 
Satoru shakes you both from your post sex bliss. He’s a mess beside you, body slick with sweat with a jutted out lip. 
“Aw, poor baby.” Suguru says, eyes glazed over as he watches Satoru. 
“Shut up.” Satoru has no bite to his tone. 
Suguru’s eyes narrow at the comment. He leans over, cock still plugging you up, and grabs Satoru’s face. 
“Watch your mouth.” 
Your pussy clenches at Suguru’s tone. His lip quirks up at your reaction before he trains it down. Your hand rubs Satoru’s cock faster now, body trembling at the idea of making him cum. The noises he lets out were a mix between hot and cute. He liked acting all tough, but you knew whenever he was in the sheets his voice betrayed him. 
Your hand tightens around his cock, brows furrowing when his hips jump to meet your hand. You were so eager to watch him fall apart in front of you. 
“F-fuck.” Satoru’s delirious as he murmurs to himself. 
His cock was so hard it hurt. From the taste of your pussy on his tongue to him watching Suguru fuck you, he could hardly take it anymore. 
“F-fuck, hah, I,” Satoru groans your name. 
Suguru watches your slippery hand tug Satoru’s cock. He did feel a little bad that Satoru hadn’t finished yet. Suguru leans down and lets his teeth dig into Satoru’s throat, sucking lightly. The mixture of sensations causes Satoru to hurl closer to the edge. He humps your fist pathetically as he grabs onto Suguru’s hair. 
“G-gonna cum.” It’s hard to hear him over the sound of his cock in your hand. 
Suguru reaches a hand down, covering yours, and starts to rub Satoru’s cock. The feeling of his palm pressing into yours makes you squeeze Satoru harder. He groans at the pressure, his stomach flexing. 
Satoru cums hard in both your hands, the white silky liquid overflowing your fingers. Suguru removes his hand first, licking his fingers as he slides out of your pussy. 
It’s hard not to complain at the feeling but you keep it in. You use a towel that Suguru provides to wipe up Satoru’s cum. Your body feels way heavier, sinking into the bed after everything. Satoru flops beside you, always extremely needy after sex. His arms wrap around you, pulling you into his body. 
Suguru stares at the tray of food, his brows pinched. 
“Guess I’ll have to heat that up.”
You chuckle. Eventually you would eat, but for now all you wanted to do was lay down with the both of them. 
“You don’t need to feed me anymore, I’m feeling better.” 
“I can tell.” Suguru murmurs. 
The boys laugh at you as you all push together, fitting together like a perfect puzzle, warmth spreading between you. 
Tag List: @tojislittleprincesss, @dinolvrrr, @kimi01985, @constawrites
If you want to be added to my taglist just let me know, specify what you want to be added to if it's just my gojo and suguru posts, or all my posts
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signedkoko · 9 months ago
Note
Hi!
Can I request a romantic oneshot for Vox with fem reader, where she helps him relax after a hard day, dealing with the other V's, or just company related stuff? This guy really needs a break 🥲
It could be just fluff or nsfw, it's up to you ;)
Also, I really love how you wrote the Valentino headcanons I requested! It seems so in character for him to feel like his masculinity is threatened by a female that's more powerful than him.
Have a nice day/night! <3
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Letting Off Steam [NSFW]
In which long days call for even longer nights where he gets to indulge in the delicacy that is you. Reader is female.
Song - Lavender Kiss by The Licks
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" Stupid fucking-fuck!"   
Automatic doors opened so fast they screeched along the floor, calling your attention to his tense figure. Every tap of his polished shoes got louder, both from his approach and his increased stomping. It could have been a new record with how fast he was pacing. 
While you wanted to give him your attention, you still had a pot on the stove. You were working on dinner, being sure to stir the noodles in the salted water so they wouldn't stick together. 
" You would not believe the gall that stupid mothball has hiding that shit from me! After everything I've done for him! " From your peripherals, you saw his claws glide down his screen in desperation, his red eyes disappearing as he shut off visuals. 
" Oh my, what has he done this time? " You hummed with a piqued interest, hoping it was something he could tell you about. Vox's line of work was always interesting. 
Vox only let out a gargled groan, pulling his bow loose so he could take off his constricting suit jacket. 
" I wouldn't want to worry you, as pissed off as I am. Just- someone I thought couldn't bother me anymore turned out to be alive and well! So alive that he's practically dancing on my enterprise as we speak. " 
He had rolled up his shirt sleeves so the white wouldn't be stained, looking to help. You placed a hand on his chest, stopping him from working on anything. 
" The pasta still needs to cook for a good while; be patient. " Even so, it was endearing knowing that, as worked up as he got, he would still find his way to your side to help. 
" Right. Honestly, I just need to distract myself right now. " Huffing, the video star pushed you back into the island, stealing a quick kiss, which consisted of him bonking his screen against you. 
You pressed a few gentle kisses along the edge of his screen; you'd gotten used to not wearing anything on your lips so you wouldn't stain him—as much as he claimed to love the kiss marks you left on his monitor.
With a few kisses and the joy of being so close, the two of you melted into one another, with the overlord giving a relaxed sigh. 
" You have no idea how much I've ached for you, dolly. " As the usual nicknames loosened out of his mouth, Vox couldn't help but let this guard down in your presence, and for a reason. You were the one thing that soothed him, and he was addicted to you, like a substance he couldn't shake from his habits. 
He wasn't sure if it was the frustration or just your sheer allure, but he couldn't stop himself from pressing on further. 
He crouched down, much to your audible confusion, only for him to hook his hands under your ass and lift you up onto the counter, where you were now eye-to-eye with him. 
The technological overlord found himself in a comfortable spot between your dangling legs, his body keeping them pushed apart. 
You could hear his fans whirring in him, knowing him well enough that he wasn't up to any good. Regardless, you missed him, and you were antsy to see where he'd take you. 
" I missed you. " 
His voice was a mutter as he distracted himself by running his cold hands up and down your thighs in a soothing motion, albeit a little desperately. Vox was still deciding just how rough he wanted to be with you.
His signature grin snapped on when he made a decision, and before you could ask, he had one hand hooked under your knees as he pushed them up, forcing you onto your back. The cool marble of the counter made you shiver—almost cold enough to cancel out the warmth your stomach burst with. 
With him pushing your knees as close to your chest as was comfortable, he had a nice view of his dessert. 
" Sorry gorgeous, I just have this crazy craving right now. " Sarcasm dripped from his tone, his free hand messily pulling your pants up to your thighs so he could look at your pretty pussy, only covered by the cloth of your panties. 
All you could see was the cieling and your own legs, besides the top of his antenna, which poked from beyond them. Anytime you tried to squirm to get a better view, his hand would push back further, keeping you in place. 
" Don't get so nervous; I'll take good care of you, " It sounded as if he wanted to say more, but he got distracted with brushing his talons along your panties, tensing the fabric so he could see everything underneath. With every shudder you made, he'd thumb your clit in a small circle, only for the cycle to repeat. 
A low hum came from him, enjoying the way you'd squirm when he kept at it for too long. 
" Oh you poor thing, you deserve more, don't you? " 
The sound of his buckle falling loose was followed by the sound of a zipper, the overlord almost ripping the clothes as he hurried to help his poor, helpless girl. 
Your patience paid off, his warm cock coming to rest on your warmth, which he slowly thrust against your clit, rutting himself through your folds. Only then did he let go of your knees, which weakly fell to the counter, so he could get a good look at your face. 
He wanted to make sure he could get a nice 'before' picture so he could compare it to your fucked-silly after image. 
" Be loud for me, yeah?"
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Author's Note - I have not written a oneshot in awhile, let alone NSFW, so I apologize if it's a little off! Hopefully I'll get more into the flow with time.
Word Count - 939
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grapejuicestyless · 5 months ago
Text
Happier
Harry Styles x fem!reader
Summery: Y/n is not happy, despite the smile etched into her face, and nobody can see that, nobody but Harry, who can’t seem to express his concern in a gentle way.
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“You look happier.”
What am I supposed to say to that? Thank you? I don’t mean to be mean when nobody meant any harm, but it feels so casually cruel for someone to pick up on the way I’ve changed and mistake my spiraling for happiness.
I don’t know the true shape of my face. My cheeks were round most of my life, meant to be kneaded between the fingers of my working class grandmother while she baked in the kitchen, but more recently the skin has fallen from the bone and what was once rolled between wrinkled fingers is tighter to my face as it strangles me from the inside out.
I don’t recognize myself either. Maybe I never did, because even when I search for the girl I once was, I can never seem to find her. I remember running around as a child with my best friend, the grass stains on my jeans and the holes in my sweater from tug of war’s in his backyard. She was happy, even if she looked tired. She was the happiest I’d ever been, but she was so young. She hadn’t found herself yet and maybe that’s what made life so good, the ignorance of the real world and how it would shape her.
Maybe the real me is the person who reaches out to her friends when she misses them, or maybe its the girl who counted down the days to her seventeenth birthday so she could finally relate to the lyrics of Dancing Queen and mean it finally. But maybe it’s the girl who sits in bed staring at the ceiling wondering why she never made it where everyone else was going. Maybe it’s the girl who wished her mother cared just a little bit more to stop comparing her to her “smarter” friends when she was twelve.
So maybe I do look happy, maybe I am happy. Maybe I have never felt happy before and maybe that’s why I feel so conflicted about if I truly am or if I am just projecting it out to seem that way.
“Harry.”
I call into the darkness, wandering the house party in a sweaty costume sticky with splashes of beer on the fabric, only half of the costume I came with.
The hallway is long and winding, but it always feels that way when I’m not exactly sure if I’m going in the right direction.
“Harry?” I call out again, spotting the other half of my costume.
“Y/n.” He smiles with a sigh, like even though the smoke between his fingers is taking off the edge, I’ve just calmed the entire air surrounding him. For me, it’s the same feeling. When he’s near, everything seems to slow down for a moment. After about the thousandth comment on how much better I looked from some friends of friends, he disappeared, and maybe that’s why their integrating looks bother me so much, because theres no hand to hold onto to distract me from myself.
I slide against the wall to sit with him, my eyes finding purchase on the same cracks across the thin hallway as he did, and the warm blunt being lazily passed from his fingers to mine.
“I think you’re rubbing all your glitter onto my pants.” he breathes out casually into the comfortable silence. I feel the tension in my shoulders expand before fading.
“I think it’s in my eyes too.”
“Just when I thought they couldn’t shine any brighter.” Harry lifts his hand to hook his index finger around my chin, smiling like an idiot when he sees my lips curl comfortably around the joint.
“Well, maybe I feel better than usual. It’s finally reflecting back to you.”
I joke, feeling sick as I recall the conversation from before. I look happier, as if to suggest that before I was miserable, and even if they weren’t wrong about that, the fact that anyone could read that without a second glance scared me. How a stranger could read me before I could.
“Well, you look like shit if you do.”
“Ouch, that obvious?”
“If I counted each time you rolled your eyes when someone told you that whole speech about how good you look, I’d run out of fingers.”
Harry laughs as he takes back the weed to finish it off. I’ve already drank more than him, so the sway in my body becomes more noticeable as the burn sears down my throat.
“It’s just so…wrong. I mean, I guess I feel okay, but do I really look good enough for all this praise?” I ask quietly into the night, my knees pressing against my chest as I hug my calves tightly between my sweaty palms.
“I think you’re very pretty, Y/n. You are pretty. But your face is changing and no amount of glitter can cover that up.” He tells me honestly, rubbing out the dying end onto his knee and sighing at the burn.
“If you still believe that then I haven’t used enough glitter.” I try to joke, to brush away the rising bile in my throat and tension in the air.
“You can fool anyone else, but I know you. Even if you’re not who you once were, I still know you because I love you.”
“Well you shouldn’t. I’m a leech. I’ll fucking suck up all the joy from your life until you’re too exhausted to leave.” I smiled at the ground drunkenly, head hung low and my eyes heavy.
“But I do. You’re my best friend and it’s pathetic how you let yourself fall so low.” Harry flicks out the end of the blunt, watching the ashes fall the floor and stain the carpet lining the thin hallway.
“I came to you for comfort, you know. Not to get drilled in a bunny costume.” I roll my eyes, the haze clearing at his bitter remarks.
“Well tough luck, I guess. You look like shit for a girl who everyone here thinks is so happy.” Harry looks at me, his hand moving to wipe away the glitter by my eye.
“I need air.” I stand up, almost stumbling against the faint curling of the carpet at the edges. It’s new and that’s how you can tell, it hasn’t fully sunken into the floor, and it’s such a shame that it’s forever stuck with the glitter from my costume and the ashes of Harry’s joint.
“You need help.”
I stop, and there’s a beat that passes.
“You’re a real asshole when you’re high, you know. I have my own shit, I don’t need to be taking yours too.” I smile at him, but only because he was smiling at me.
“Maybe I am.” He responds plainly, and when he looks the other way, I feel heavier than before, more picked apart than before, more vulnerable than before.
Theres a thousand eyes on my back just waiting for me to crack, like the chip in my tooth from how hard I’m smiling while talking to strangers about my hopeless life. And they all say I look happier.
“But y/n,” Harry calls out for me, and for a moment I believe he might apologize.
“You look happy.”
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softguarnere · 11 months ago
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Something He Can't Have
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Edmund Pevensie x fem!reader
A/N: Not me falling back into one of my oldest hyperfixations after watching the movies this past week for Christmas 🥴 I honestly don't know what to say for myself, other than that I had fun writing this and it may have single-handedly saved me from my recent writing slump. Anyway, hope y'all like this, byeeee ✨💕 Warnings: none
Lucy lets out a groan that sounds so annoyed that it instantly draws Edmund back into the present moment. “Can I ple-ease say something now?” She asks Susan, who sits to her left at the banquet table.
Susan shushes her, but there’s no malice behind it. In fact, when she does allow a disheartened look to grace her face, she directs it toward Edmund. “No. I suppose we shouldn’t meddle.”
They’ve captured his interest. Which is something that seems nearly impossible, considering that he’s spent so much of this banquet staring at Peter and (Y/N) on the dance floor, watching his older brother enjoy dance after dance with her. And trying hard not to take it too personally when (Y/N) throws back her head to laugh every now and then at something that Peter has said. Usually, she only laughs like that at his jokes, and usually only when they’re alone together.
If Peter is making her come undone, allowing her to feel comfortable outside of the carefully crafted polite and diplomatic persona that (Y/N) has created for herself to use in Cair Paravel’s court, then she’s become relaxed with him. And who knows where that will lead?
“What are you talking about?” For good measure, Edmund tosses one last glance at the dance floor before turning his attention to his sisters.
“That!” Lucy exclaims, gesturing between Edmund and the crowd that swirl on the floor before them. “This!”
Edmund raises an eyebrow. “The ball?”
His younger sister groans, burying her head in her hands. “Oh, I give up!”
“Edmund,” Susan says sternly. “I promised myself that I wouldn’t get involved, but this has gone on long enough.” For a split second, the gentle queen loses her composure, though only ever so slightly. “I mean, for God’s sake! It’s downright painful to watch!”
Still confused, Edmund isn’t sure what to say that will clarify whatever his sisters are talking about without further upsetting them. Instead, he settles for biting his lip, glancing between his sisters and the dancing, trying to work out their meaning himself.
Susan sighs, turning to Lucy. “He’s either a better actor than we give him credit for, or he’s downright daft.”
“Help me out here,” Edmund says.
“(Y/N)!” Lucy hisses, leaning across Susan so that she can scold her brother without causing too much unwanted attention. “You’ve been following her around all lovesick for ages now, but you haven’t done anything. And now you’re all jealous watching her dance with Peter.”
“Am not!”
Lucy swats his arm. “You’ve been staring at them all night. If you like her so much, then you better do something before you lose her forever!”
In other situations, Susan might chide the youngest Pevensie sibling, telling her that she’s being a bit overdramatic before offering Edmund some sort of good-natured advice. Edmund looks to her expectantly, only to find her brown eyes full of disappointment; she agrees with Lucy.
“We can all agree that you wear green better than any other, Ed,” she says. “But jealousy is not a shade that suits you.”
“Me? Jealous?! Of who?”
But his sisters only fix him with knowing looks. It makes Edmund want to wither away from existence on the spot. He spent most of their lives before Narnia being jealous of Peter. It’s been hard, but it’s something that he’s worked on since they were crowned. He really thought that he had overcome it. Now, though, his sisters’ words, coupled with the funny feeling in his stomach . . . He feels like a man, trapped, full of guilt, and caught in the middle of something very private. Which innocent people with nothing to hide do not feel in situations like these.
I fancy (Y/N), he realizes, admitting it to himself for the first time. It feels demeaning, somehow, to put a label on the feelings that he’s been harboring in secret for so long. And I’m jealous because she likes Peter more than me, says the next one, which makes him feel even worse.
A warm hand takes hold of his and squeezes. For all the annoyance that Lucy has felt toward him in these past few minutes, she offers him nothing but a kind look and encouraging smile. “You have to do something, Ed.”
“I – “ The words clog in his throat, causing him to swallow thickly, trying to find some of the air which has suddenly become very scarce. As you spin by on the dance floor, Edmund can see how you’re smiling at Peter like he hung the moon, and how his older brother beams at you like you created all the stars. Who wouldn’t want to bask in the sun’s warmth like that? And what sort of evil would dare separate two people who appear to be so . . . so in love. “I can’t.”
“You can,” Susan reassures him. “Trust me, Ed.”
Edmund, however, can’t take his eyes off of you. “I can’t ruin that.”
“You won’t,” Susan says. And if Edmund had his wits about him, he would recognize that she says it with the tone of someone who is very sure of herself because she has access to information that no one else has. (She, after all, is your best friend. But facts like that tend to fall by the wayside in moments of intense anxiety such as this.) “Ed, it’ll be fine. Trust me.”
To unstick the words in his throat, Edmund reaches for his goblet and takes a swig of the drink from inside. If he’s really going to do this, he’ll need all the courage he can get, no matter where it comes from.
As the song ends, he pushes back his chair and begins to make his way around the table. Lucy squeals with delight from behind him, and both his sisters offer nods of encouragement and thumbs up when he turns back to them, unsure.
The next thing that he knows, he’s on the dance floor, maneuvering his way through the crowd to reach you –
He catches sight of you just as you excuse yourself from the dance floor. You disappear into the crowd before he can call out to you, though he reaches out a hand, like he might be able to catch you from afar.
“Edmund!” A well-meaning slap on the back announces Peter’s presence. His older brother throws an arm around his shoulders. He radiates heat after all that dancing. “I wondered when you might join us on the dance floor.”
“I’m not. I’m just looking for (Y/N).”
Peter’s smile doesn’t falter, despite the fact that the next words out of his mouth are devastating news. “I believe that she’s retiring for the night.”
“Oh?”
“She said that she needed some air, that she might go to bed.”
As one of Narnia’s kings, Edmund is inclined to stay present for the majority of this banquet. You, being a courtier, are free to go as you please, seeing as there are no diplomatic negotiations, no fates of any nations, resting on your shoulders. If things were different, he would find a way to go after you.
And he’s actually looking for an excuse to do so when Peter says something that makes him stop.
“I wish she would have stayed,” the High King sighs. “We were having such a good time.”
Edmund nods, hands involuntarily clenching into fists at his sides. His voice feels hollow when he replies, “It looked like you were having a good time.”
“I was thinking – “ A laugh cuts Peter off as he shakes his head, looking half embarrassed, half giddy. “I was actually just about to ask her to be my – my girlfriend.” On the last word, something most unusual happens – the High King blushes. Actually blushes! Who would have known that such a thing was possible?
To say that it catches Edmund off guard would be an understatement. He’s never seen Peter so vulnerable . . . so happy. It makes Edmund’s mouth go dry. He and Peter have had their differences throughout their lives, but he can’t just ruin his older brother’s chance at happiness.
“Oh.” Is all that Edmund can think to say. He hesitates for a moment before asking, “What do you think she’ll say?”
Peter laughs, breathlessly, happily. “Well, I’m hoping that she’ll say yes, of course. In fact – “ He glances in the direction that you disappeared in. “ – I would go talk to her now, if not for my responsibilities.”
“Go,” Edmund finds himself saying. He can feel Peter’s look of surprise mirrored on his own face. But if Peter is going to do this, if this is all really happening, he’d honestly rather get it over with. “I’ll cover for you here.”
Now it’s Peter who hesitates. After a moment, his face breaks into a wide smile. He claps Edmund on the shoulder. “You’re a good man, Ed.”
I wish I were better, the Just King thinks as he watches his older brother chase after the girl that they both love.  
From the banquet table, Lucy and Susan are giving him confused looks. Edmund only shrugs, then quietly rejoins them. He doesn’t speak, doesn’t want to explain what’s just happened. He recedes into himself, letting the party whirl by without him.
If only he were paying attention – then he would see the knowing look on Susan’s face.
. . .
It’s late when the banquet ends, and later still when Edmund slips into the library. He’s exhausted, but his mind is racing and won’t let him sleep. You and Peter had disappeared from the banquet hours ago. That’s plenty of time for his brother to have confessed to you and for you to have accepted. Dread fills him at the thought of the two of you happily announcing your new relationship the next morning at breakfast. He’ll have to face the two of you sometime, to muscle through his own pain and begin navigating a world where he has to accept that you’re in love with his older brother. But tonight, he can be amongst his books, which are a comfort.
He's so distracted that he doesn’t immediately notice you sitting by the fireplace, an open book on your lap, but a distracted look on your face as you watch the flames dance before you.
“Oh,” you both exclaim at the same time when you notice each other. The synchronicity makes you both laugh.
“I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he apologizes.
“I didn’t mean to take your hiding spot,” you say in turn. You shut your book, but Edmund holds out a hand to stop you.
“You don’t have to leave on my account.”
You squint, studying him for a second, before nodding and settling back into the cushions behind you. “Thank you.”
“Of course.” Carefully, Edmund takes a seat opposite you, gazing into the fire to gather his nerve. He didn’t expect to find you here. Didn’t expect to find you looking so . . . distracted and lonely as you stare into the fire, your book forgotten. He really shouldn’t pry. But you’re his friend, first and foremost, and he doesn’t want that to change. “Is everything alright?”
Delicate fingers pinch the bridge of your nose. You sigh, collecting yourself before looking up at him through the firelight.
“Peter asked me to be his girlfriend,” you confess. Though the library is quiet, your voice is dull, hard to hear. You do not look as joyful as he imagined you would when delivering this news.
“Oh,” Edmund offers. He fumbles for words. You look upset, so he can’t congratulate you. But then again, he’s not sure if he should console you.
You stare at him for a moment, studying him just as intently as he’s studying you. “I said no,” you finally explain.
“Oh,” Edmund says again, for lack of anything better to say. “I’m . . . sorry?” Except that he’s really not. He feels quite relieved, if he’s being honest with himself.
Your brows furrow. He’s said the wrong thing, but he’s not sure where he went wrong.
“I said no,” you repeat. “Because I have feelings for someone else.”
Edmund’s heart, only on the mend for a split second, plummets. “Oh. I see.”
“No you don’t,” you scoff. “Edmund, you’re the one I have feelings for! Have you really not noticed by now?”
The words echo through the still library. They hang between you for a moment. A glorious, albeit confusing, moment where Edmund can do nothing but stare at you, unsure if he’s heard you correctly. Narnia is a magical place, but there’s no way that you could have said the very thing that he would do anything to hear.
“You do?” His voice comes so quietly that when you don’t immediately reply, he worries that maybe he hasn’t spoken at all.
“Yes. And for quite some time, I might add.”
“But – “ Images of the night swirl in his mind. You had danced with Peter for ages, looking so happy. Everyone likes Peter. They always have. And much, much more than they like Edmund. To say that you have feelings for him . . . “Why?”
You blink, taken aback. “What do you mean?”
“I mean . . . Everyone likes Peter. He always gets what he wants.”
Even in the dim glow of the firelight, he can see your gaze soften.
“Oh, Edmund.” You leave your seat, coming closer to him. He rises, meeting you halfway, so that the two of you are standing together in front of the fire. Gently, you take his hand, intwining your fingers. Your hand is warm in his. You squeeze, and on instinct, he squeezes back. “That’s not true.”
“What’s not?”
“People like you, too. I like you.” Your grip tightens on his hand. “And Peter doesn’t always get what he wants. I know something he can’t have.”
“What’s that?”
A smile tugs at your lips when you gaze up at him and say, “He can’t have this.”
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aliceintheworld · 2 months ago
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PURE ATTRACTION | JJK | TATTOO ARTIST
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Pairing: TattooArtistJungkook X NaiveReader
Summary: "I shouldn't be watching a man undressing, especially not from the house next door."
Warning: more religion 😬 depression, Jimin, Taehyung, and Yoongi appear. Jungkook in a towel 💦👅 finally a kiss (things from here happen quickly.) ATTENTION, THIS STORY IS NOT SLOWBURN.
A/N: Guys, I took a while this time for reasons of: laziness and discouragement. I wanted more people to read what I write, but I'm introverted even on the Internet, which leaves me with few alternatives to show my writing to the world. Thinking about it, I'm in trouble. Other than that, only a few days have passed, so everything is fine. Back to the story, everything starts to pick up pace. Just to repeat, the fanfic is not slowburn, so there will be smut in the next chapter. Stay tuned.
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Chapter 3
I spend the whole week riding an emotional rollercoaster. I find myself visiting my neighbor, Mrs. Jeon, more frequently than usual, and with each visit, our friendship blossoms deeper. She shares stories of her youth, of wild adventures and carefree days when she was my age. Her openness encourages me to share my own experiences–or rather, my lack of them. I recount my first disastrous kiss, confess that I've never been in love, and reveal how my once unshakeable faith in the church has wavered since my father's passing. I feel a weight lift off my shoulders; here, I am free to be imperfect, to be vulnerable, without fear of judgment.
Yet, there's one thing I keep to myself: the incident with her son, Jungkook, and the profound effect he has on me. Throughout all my visits, I never see him again. Curiosity gets the better of me, and I casually ask Mrs. Jeon where he is. She tells me that he moved and rented an apartment to avoid being a burden. He only spent the first night at home after his trip, and I remember that night well–from my window, of course–but I don't mention it. Disappointment settles in me like a stone; I long to see him again, but I focus on his mother instead. Having her to confide in is a relief, a breath of fresh air in my otherwise stifling life.
I patiently wait for her to open up about her own struggles, her depression, but she never does. I worry that I might know something I shouldn't, that perhaps she's not comfortable sharing with me. But I promise myself I'll keep her secret safe, no matter what. Today is Sunday, and I won't visit Mrs. Jeon since I'll see her at church. I'm excited–despite my mother making unnecessary comments and disturbing my peace of mind, I'll have someone to rely on.
I smooth down my dark brown dress, fixing my messy hair. I dab a bit of lipstick on my fingertips and press it onto my lips, careful not to overdo it. The truth is, I enjoy makeup, but I've never learned how to apply it properly. I feel embarrassed drawing attention to myself with bolder colors; after all, people are used to my lack of vanity. I sigh, steeling myself as I head downstairs to meet my mother.
She hasn't stopped talking about Jungkook. Unlike me, who had a good first impression, she despises him. She criticizes everything: his eyebrow piercing, his bold style, his tattoos, even the way he carries himself. I can't help but wonder if she accepted the dinner invitation just to analyze him, searching for flaws that exist only in her mind. She's been friends with Misuk since moving to town, and I want to believe–perhaps naively–that my mother doesn't have ulterior motives.
We arrive at church early, the space quiet with only a few members milling about. My mother drifts away to chat with the older congregation, and I find a seat, taking a deep breath. I scan the room for Mrs. Jeon but I don't see her. Since it's still early, I'm not too worried. I take a moment to read the Bible, reflecting on positive thoughts when I feel a gentle touch on my shoulder. I turn, and there he is–Jungkook, smiling brightly. I frown, almost convinced he's a mirage. Am I daydreaming?
"Hi Y/N, are you okay?" he asks softly, his lips brushing almost against my ear. His intense gaze locks with mine, and I'm relieved to be sitting down; my legs feel weak in his presence.
"Everything's fine," I reply, my eyes dropping to my fingers. I want to engage him, ask about his week, inquire how he's been, but the words stick in my throat. It's as though I can't act normally around him. I take a deep breath, mustering the courage to comment, "I didn't know you attended church."
"I don't," he laughs, amusement dancing in his eyes. And rightly so; considering his clothes–a heavy leather jacket, shaved sides, and a wavy fringe–it's sexy but definitely not what you'd expect at church. "I haven't been since I was a kid."
"Really? Why?" I ask, genuinely curious, my gaze drawn to his eyebrow piercing, oddly captivating.
"I didn't feel welcome," he replies simply. There's no bitterness in his voice, and I understand all too well what he means. My mother, for example, was the first to judge him based on his appearance, and I can only imagine how difficult it is to feel at home in a place where you're not embraced.
"I understand," I say, unsure of what else to add. "So, you came here to give it another shot?"
"No way," he chuckles. "Actually, my mom mentioned you two planned to meet at church today."
"That's true," I confirm.
"Unfortunately, she can't make it today. She's not feeling well."
"Is she okay?" My concern surfaces immediately.
"She's fine, don't worry. Just a headache, and she took some medicine. She'll be better soon," he assures me, his hand lightly touching my shoulder. I can't help but notice how warm and gentle his touch is. I shake my head, trying to divert my thoughts from Jungkook's hands to anything else.
"I'm relieved to hear that," I smile, noticing the church is starting to fill up.
"I'm actually inviting some friends over to my apartment, and I wanted to know if you'd like to join us," he says, brushing his fingertips against his ear, a bit shy. I'm taken aback; I didn't expect this invitation. He wants me to come over with his friends?
"And why?" I ask, surprised. It's been a while since we last saw each other, and we haven't talked much even then.
"I like you. I want you to come so we can have fun."
"If this is some kind of payment, or something like that... you really don't need to." I reply, not believing it. I don't have friends, and the thought that he wants to be with me and the people he likes seems absurd to me.
"It's not that. I'm even a bit offended." He jokes, smiling. "I really want you to come, please."
"Jungkook... I don't know."
"I swear they're nice. Every time I'm in Busan, we hang out. They're trustworthy, I promise."
"I can imagine," I reply, still hesitant. I'd have to leave church, skip the service, and ask my mother for permission to go out with him, and of course, she wouldn't allow it. No way. It's not that I don't want to; I desperately want to spend time with him. That's been on my mind all week. "I don't think it's possible; my mom..."
"I know," he interjects, as if he anticipated my response. "But what if, just this once, you say you are going to my mom's? We could say I'm taking you there when in fact, you're coming to my apartment."
"Are you asking me to lie to my mother in a church?" I can't help but laugh at the absurdity of it. He shrugs, grinning.
"God knows it's just once," he replies confidently, pouting slightly. "What do you say? Later, I can take you to my mom's whenever you want, or you can stay at my apartment since I have more than one room. You set the time and conditions."
"Jungkook..." I groan, covering my face with my hands. The thought of lying to my mother, especially to go to a guy's house, sends a wave of anxiety through me. If she finds out, I'll be in big trouble.
"Come on! It'll be fun. I promise," he pleads softly. I can't say no to him, at least not now. I nod, agreeing to the madness.
"Okay, but you're the one who's going to talk to my mom. And if I say I want to leave, you agree. No alcohol because I know you drive. Those are my conditions," I assert, trying to sound firm. He smiles and salutes me, like a soldier receiving orders, and I slowly get up, taking small steps toward my mother. I let Jungkook lead the way, my nerves creeping back as I prepare to tell a lie in this sacred place.
"Good afternoon, Mrs. Eunji. Good afternoon, everyone," he greets my mom and the other church members. My mother looks utterly shocked, her eyes nearly popping out of her head as she takes in his appearance.
"Good afternoon, Jungkook," she replies, lacking enthusiasm, her gaze scanning him from head to toe. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to do a favor for my mom," he clarifies, and if I didn't know better, I'd almost believe him. "My mom asked Y/N to keep her company since my dad will be out of town for a few days. I came to pick her up."
"Really?" my mom looks at me, and I don't say anything, just nodding.
"It's true. My dad went to Daegu this weekend, and since my mom hasn't been feeling well, she asked Y/N to spend time with her. If you allow it, of course," he smiles calmly, and I brace myself waiting for my mother's response. I watch her weigh her options, glancing between Jungkook and me for what feels like an eternity before she sighs and nods.
"Alright, that's fine. Is your mom feeling okay?"
"Yes, she's getting better. Can we go now?" he asks, a hint of urgency in his voice.
"Yes, you may go," my mom sighs, placing a hand on her forehead. "It's a shame you're missing the service today, Y/N. Next week, you'll definitely come, okay?"
"Yes, mom, for sure," I agree weakly, clearing my throat and avoiding her gaze, still stunned that she let me go to Jungkook's house. Well, not his house, but is practically the same thing.
"Shall we go, Y/N? My mom is waiting," Jungkook says, raising an eyebrow. I nod, still silent, as we make our way toward the exit.
Some people stare, especially the older members, who seem shocked by Jungkook's appearance–too conservative, in my opinion. Somehow, the situation feels even funnier. Once we're sure no one can see us anymore, I burst into laughter, clutching my stomach. Jungkook chuckles too, exhaling as if he's just finished a tough exam and is finally free.
"Your mom is tough, huh?" he laughs. "I thought she was going to kill me with her eyes."
"Sorry," I say, still giggling a little. "She's like that with everyone."
"Even with you?"
"Even with me," I nod. "What do we do now?"
"Now, we go to my apartment. My friends have the key, so they're probably already there."
"Don't tell me they're all guys," I groan, suddenly anxious. I hadn't considered that he might not have any female friends, and I'd be the only girl at the apartment if that were the case.
"No, relax! I have female friends too. You'll like them," he assures me, walking toward a sleek black car parked across the street. I know nothing about cars, but I can tell this one is expensive. I feel out of place, acutely aware that Jungkook lives in a different world, one that's far removed from my own.
The tension in the car is palpable as we drive. The ride feels like it takes forever, the windows closed, and I'm intoxicated by his scent. I discreetly watch his large hands on the wheel, the way his long fingers tap rhythmically against the leather seat. I have to swallow hard to keep from drooling over him. I'm starving–not for food, but for him. All week, I've yearned to be near him, to touch him. I think I'm suffering from a Jungkook overdose, craving something I haven't even tasted yet.
I ponder whether he's aware of the effect he has on me, but I like to believe he hasn't noticed. It's easier that way. I breathe slowly, attempting to relax in my seat. It takes another ten minutes before Jungkook opens the gate to a condo with a small remote and drives in slowly. His car fits the place perfectly. Everything is stunning and upscale. I glance at my clothes and regret agreeing to come. Why did I say yes? I don't know his friends, and I don't know Jungkook that well, aside from the overwhelming attraction I feel toward him. What do I actually know about him? That he's a tattoo artist from Seoul? That he's rich and hasn't set foot in a church since childhood? I feel like I've walked into a situation that's spiraling out of control.
"Hey, Y/N, are you okay? You went quiet all of a sudden," he asks, concern etched on his face.
"I'm fine. Just feeling a bit strange," I admit.
"Why?"
"I don't know," I confess, omitting my paranoid thoughts. "I always feel like this in new places."
"I get that. I feel that way too," he tells me as we step into the parking elevator. I follow him, digesting this new revelation.
"You seem so confident and social," I comment, genuinely amazed. His big eyes meet mine as the elevator rises, floors passing by in a blur.
"I know, it seems that way. But in reality, I'm quite introverted. I have a small circle of friends and prefer it that way. I just fake it really well," he shares, and I find myself wanting to know more about the person behind the confident exterior.
"Really?" I ask, intrigued.
"Yeah," he nods, his expression earnest.
I try to respond, but the elevator stops on a floor, and Jungkook smiles at me, indicating that this is the right place. I feel one of his hands gently touch my waist, guiding me to a white door. I have to take a deep breath to keep from freaking out, my sweaty, trembling hands hidden in my pocket. I hear different music from the other side of the door before the place fully opens up to us.
"Hey, he's here! Finally, Jungkook!" I hear a male voice. It's a guy around Jungkook's age, I realize as soon as we walk in. His hair is a dark red, and his skin is pale and smooth. It's no surprise that his arms are covered in tattoos, drawings and phrases I can't read so far away. He also watches me closely, smiling warmly.
"Guys, this is YN, the one I told you about," Jungkook introduces me with a smile.
I turn red because there are at least seven people staring at me from head to toe. The apartment is well-kept, with dark wooden furniture. The living room is immaculate, with abstract paintings and photos of Jungkook and his family on the walls. I don't have much time to take everything in as my eyes focus on Jungkook's friends, who are strangers to me so far. Saying they're different from me would be an understatement.
They all have many tattoos and wear dark clothing. I sense an aura of confidence from all of them, but never hostility. It's as if they're very similar to Jungkook, with a completely different exterior from their inner selves. I relax a bit, smiling warmly and putting on my best expression.
"Nice to meet you all," I say, feeling a bit shy. They stand up and smile at me.
"Nice to meet you, Y/N. I'm Yoongi. That's my girlfriend, Minji," says the red-haired guy, pointing to the woman who just smiles. I offer my hand, feeling his cold skin from the beer bottle he was holding earlier.
"I'm Bora, and this is my boyfriend, Jimin," one of the dark-haired women greets me next, pointing to her boyfriend. They're a good-looking couple, the kind you see in magazines. Jimin has the brightest and most open smile.
"Nice to meet you," I nod.
"I'm Taehyung, but you can call me Tae," one of the guys says, taking a sip of his drink.
"I'm Yoori, Tae's girlfriend. Nice to meet you," she winks, making me laugh.
"And I'm Hayun, the only single one in the group," one of the girls shakes my hand, pulling me into a hug. She kisses my cheek, making her presence increasingly noticeable.
"Hayun, you're only single because you want to be, come on," Bora rolls her eyes. Hayun laughs, grabbing a snack from the coffee table.
"I like being single, except when I'm surrounded by couples. Especially couples like you guys."
"Do you have a boyfriend, Y/N?" Jimin asks. Embarrassed, I shake my head.
"No," I reply. They seem surprised, making noises with their mouths.
"But Jungkook is single too, right?" The guy with dark hair says, drinking his beverage. I thinks his name is Tae, if I remember right.
"And I want to keep that way." Jungkook replys.
"Of course you do." Yoongi laughs along with his friends, rolling his eyes. I remain silent, not understanding the joke. Then Yoongi looks at me and seems to notice my confusion. "Y/N, Jungkook never dates. The only time he tried, it went so wrong that now he doesn’t want to do it again."
"It was a disaster." Yoori adds, as if telling a fictional story. Jungkook rolls his eyes, sighing, but his friend continues: "he’s been avoiding relationships like the devil avoids the cross since then."
"Really?" I ask, genuinely curious.
"It’s not true, Y/N." Jungkook smiles at me. "They’re idiots."
"That’s not a lie." Minji, who had been silent until then, clarifies. "He’s been asked out several times, and he always declines. Women go crazy for him, for some reason."
"I know what the reason is." Jimin laughs mischievously, suggesting something while raising an eyebrow. I turn red when they laugh at the joke. Jungkook doesn’t contest it, too busy eating one of the snacks on the table. "But what about you, Y/N? Have you ever dated before?"
"Never." I reply. They don't look surprised this time.
"So you're like Jungkook, who avoids relationships?" Bora asks with a laugh. I feel Jungkook's eyes on me, watching attentively for my response. I shake my head, feeling awkward.
"No, actually, it's just a lack of options," I clarify, deciding to be honest. I hold my hands together nervously.
"Now you have two options," Yoongi suggests with a chuckle. Minji hits his arm trying to stop him, but he continues: "There's Hayun, since she likes to try out a little bit of everything, like some pussy and shit."
"Oh!" I widen my eyes, shocked, as they laugh even more. It's the first time I've seen someone speak so openly like this. Embarrassed, I look at Hayun, but she doesn't seem to mind the comment, laughing with the others.
"Who would be the other option?" Taehyung asks his friend with his trademark grin.
"Our friend Jungkook, obviously," Yoongi clarifies, and I choke on the answer, coughing uncontrollably.
They laugh even more, watching me nearly suffocate from the joke. Jungkook pats my back, smiling widely. His thumb caresses the skin of my arm, waiting for me to calm down. We're so close that he inadvertently wraps one of his arms around my shoulder. I'm shocked and even more unsettled. For me, physical contact beyond my mom is rare. Hugs, affection... I'm just not used to it.
"Are you okay?" he asks amidst his friends' chatter. I nod, staring at my hands. "Sorry about Yoongi; he always makes these kinds of jokes. He doesn't mean any harm."
"It's fine," I assure him, feeling awkward, unable to look into his eyes. "I actually liked everyone."
"Really?" he asks, bringing his nose close to my hair. My whole body shivers as I realize he's smelling my perfume, giving a satisfied smile when he pulls away. "Good to know."
I stay silent, feeling his warm breath near me. Jungkook removes his arm from my shoulder, but his skin still brushes against mine when he takes off his heavy jacket, leaving him in just a T-shirt. His friends are fun and involve me in the conversation, making me feel comfortable, but the truth is that having Jungkook so close drives me crazy and I can't pay much attention. I wonder how long I'll feel this way about him. Will this strong effect never go away? This is the third time we've met, but something tells me that no matter how many times I see him-be it two times or a thousand-my heart will always race whenever he gets close and smiles at me.
I don't even notice the time passing and only realize it's late when Yoongi, Jimin and Taehyung offer to take their girlfriends home, along with Hayun, who complains about not having anyone waiting for her at her apartment. Everyone leaves until only Jungkook and I remain. He promised to take me to his mother's house if I wanted, but I'm hesitant to ask as it's quite likely Mrs. Jeon is already asleep by now.
"Y/N, do you want me to get a towel for you?" Jungkook asks, tidying up the living room. I'm confused, picking up some empty soju bottles his friends drank to throw away.
"What do you mean?"
"You're not going to stay here?" he asks, furrowing his brow.
"Not really?" I laugh, then realize I might have been a bit rude, so I rephrase my response. "I mean, I don't think so. I don't want to be a bother."
"It's no bother. If you want, you can take a shower in my bathroom and sleep in the guest room." He offers with a smile. I bite my lower lip, unsure what to decide. I want to stay here, but it's just him and me now; is it really the right thing to do? It doesn't matter, Y/N. Just for one night.
"Okay then. Do you have a toothbrush, please?"
"Of course I do. Come with me, I'll get the stuff for you to use the bathroom." He calls me with a smile and walks down the long hallway. We pass by a few doors until we reach his room. My throat goes dry as my eyes scan the new space. His bed is large and covered with a dark gray blanket. The walls are white and everything is very organized, with a laptop next to the wardrobe and a fluffy black rug on the floor. His scent is everywhere, almost as if I'm breathing him. I clutch my hands together nervously about being alone with Jungkook in such an intimate space. He reappears after going to the closet, holding a white towel and some cotton clothes.
"You can take a shower in my bathroom while I use the guest one," he says, placing the items in my hands.
"Jungkook, that's not necessary..."
"Don't worry. I want you to be comfortable." He says before I can argue. His satisfied smile makes me not deny it again, happy to receive so much care from him. I just nod, agreeing. "The toothbrush is in the cabinet by the sink, in the package. You can open it, okay?"
"Okay, thank you very much." I smile before he walks down the hallway. I head to the door leading to the bathroom and sneak into the new space. I start thinking Jungkook has no flaws.
The place is as clean as the rest of the apartment, which makes me curious; does he clean everything himself, or does he hire someone to keep it tidy? I slowly take off my dress, grabbing my phone to text my mom and let her know I'm okay. I feel bad for lying, but the night was so good that I can't truly regret it. If I had to lie, to meet these same people, I would do it again. Thinking this surprises me, because just a few hours ago, I didn't think this way. The shower has a strong hot jet of water that massages my whole body, and it's so good that I have to convince myself to finish the shower and put on the clothes, trying to be done before Jungkook.
I brush my teeth quickly, smelling my skin that's still male fragrant with the liquid soap. I smile at myself in the mirror, brushing my hair with my fingers, trying to manage the unwashed strands. I open the bathroom door carefully, trying not to make too much noise and disturb the neighbors at this hour, when I see Jungkook again, this time only in a towel. I hold onto the doorframe, barely able to stand. A voice in my head tells me I shouldn't be watching him naked again and that I should turn around, go back into the bathroom, and pretend nothing happened, but I can't. I simply can't anymore. His muscular, wet back is in my field of vision as he searches for clothes. At that moment, my brain turns to mush and I decide to say what's been stuck in my throat.
"You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?" I muster the courage to ask him but I regret it immediately. What the hell am I doing? Jungkook turns slowly and the view from the front is a thousand times better than from the back. His whole body glistens in the light of the room, and his tattoos have never been so vivid. His body is muscular, virile and strong. I gonna lose my mind! Feeling new sensations I've never experienced for anyone before.
"Y/N?" He whispers my name with that soft voice he used when we first met. He doesn't seem surprised or embarrassed, which makes me even more unsettled.
"You're doing this on purpose, Jungkook?" I ask again. I have no idea where I got such courage and I don't know how long it will last. My heart feels like it's going to leap out of my chest. My whole body is on edge and sweating. I feel my hands trembling as I swallow hard. "You're trying something? I mean... you're not wearing clothes again and..."
"What do you think, Y/N?" he retorts suddenly, with a hoarse, deep voice. His eyes wander from my head to toes, as he raises an eyebrow along with his piercing, with a smirk at the corner of his mouth. My legs turn to weak twigs immediately, ready to collapse.
"I-I don't know." I stammer as he takes one step, then two and three, getting closer and closer to me.
"When I arrived from my trip to Busan, on the first day, I was tired and exhausted," he tells me, taking another step. I start to run out of breath, anxious and aroused. My cheeks flush as he speaks more slowly. "All I wanted was to rest and sleep the whole night, but that night I couldn't, not for an hour. Do you know why?"
"N-no..." I moan softly as his chest presses against mine. His warm, wet skin makes contact with mine, and I no longer know where I begin or end, pressed against his body. His pink lips curl into a wicked smile, as if he knows exactly what he's doing to me and it's all intentional. I shiver as his free hand moves up my wrist and grips the back of my neck firmly, making my eyes focus on his mouth and then his dark, deep eyes.
"A woman, next window, taking off all her damn clothes, completely shameless," he growls, pulling my neck closer to his face and pressing his lips to my ear. My spine tingles as I feel his teeth on my earlobe, in a bite that doesn't hurt but damn, it makes me shiver. My body contracts once and twice, and I know exactly what I'm feeling now: desire. The kind I feel occasionally when I try to touch myself alone and can't reach climax. The feeling I only have when I'm alone and confortable in my bed, trying to use my imagination even with the lack of real experience, but this is real, and it is infinitely better than what my mind could create.
"It was an accident, Jung..." I try to say, but my voice doesn't come out. The tip of his nose travels along a sensitive spot behind my ear, one I didn't even know existed, slowly moving down my jawline, discovering new paths. His hand tightens around my waist, keeping me in place, immobile.
"It may be that you didn't notice, Y/N, but I know you were watching me, even while I was undressing, even when you had every opportunity to stop." He argues with a smile, as someone who knows what they're doing and enjoys seeing the result. "And you know what's worse...? The worst thing is knowing the effect you have on me. From the first time I saw you in my house, with your innocent and curious eyes. I can't get you out of my damn head. Your mouth, your scent..."
"J-Jungkook... please." I beg, closing my eyes tightly. And I know what I want. I want him, since the first time I saw him. Since my eyes met his, I desired him so strongly that I couldn't think straight. He pulls away just a little, and I almost moan in a plea for him not to go. He sighs, pressing his forehead to mine.
"Can I kiss you, Y/N?" he asks in a very soft voice, and I nod because, despite all the things I believe in–God, hell, heaven and even my mother–nothing has ever been as adored as Jungkook. Since I met him, inexplicably, I only think about him, like a spell unable to contemplate of any other answer besides yes. I look at his eyes as they travel to my mouth, and I lower mine to his, exhilarated by that pink that only exists in him.
I move closer, my lips almost touching his, feeling the warmth of his breath. "Just kiss me, please." I murmur scared of what I'm doing; temptation clear in every word. And then he does.
Ask for a TAGLIST in the comments.
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@ane102 @ttipa @joonwater
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the-fiction-witch · 3 months ago
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I Love This Maiden
Media - House Of The Dragon Character - Aegon Targaryen Couple - Aegon X Reader Reader - (OC) Ellisa Rating - 18 + Mommy kink / breast play / breast sucking / bread feeding / milk drinking / comfort kink Word Count - 1234
Requested -
AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON! AEGON!AEGON! AEGON! AEGON!AEGON! AEGON! AEGON!
I AM BEGGING FOR THE OTHER PART OF THE BREASTFEEDING AEGON PLEEEEAAAASSSEEEE
I submitted a request/idea like this to another writer but I will not keep this like head canon idea type thing to myself........ Aegon is 100% the type to love his girl breastfeeding him... him being all stressed and angry or sad from the council not listening to him and Alicent being cruel and everything and he just wants to lay his head in her lap and latch his mouth onto her nipple and drink in her sweet milk... it makes him feel at peace... makes him feel wanted and loved and special
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Aegon had already been drinking before the night had even come to pass, the wine had been warming his stomach since breakfast with his wife. But now that night had fallen over Kings Landing, he had gathered his regular companions and gone down the usual route. Stopping by, a few inns and taverns all graciously serving the king before, of course, ending the night in one of the brothels down the street of silk. Aegon almost always went to this brothel, he liked the owner's prices and he liked the many sorts of girls who worked there.
One more than others,
Ellisa sat on her bed lounging in the candlelight, dressed in her sheet blue gown with two high slits for her legs, the top of the dress wrapped around the choker at her neck, her long hair cascading down her back.
Laughter erupted from outside in the hallway and the curtain was pulled open revealing Aegon and his companions arm in arm and falling over each other drunk,
“Ah!” Aegon smiled raising his glass, “Ellisa, there you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” he stumbled over falling to his knees on her bed,
“I’ve been here,” She shrugged, “as I always am,”
“Indeed,” he cooed, moving closer and rubbing the tip of his nose against hers,
“You’re grace, are you sure you do not wish for me to find you-” One of his companion boys came closer,
Aegon wrapped his arm around the boy's shoulder and tapped his hand against the boy's tender cheek, “Fuck off Marcello,” He chuckled,
“Yes your grace,” Marcello nodded leaving the room and taking the other of Aegon’s companions with him leaving Aegon and Ellisa alone,
“... Gods know how I have missed you,” He cooed, a tone of clarity even though his drunkenness,
“As have I you, your grace,” She smiled,
He grimaced, “No…” he shook his head, “Not here, not with you.”
“Of course, Forgive me.”
“You always are.” He smiled kissing her cheek,
She nodded, “Come here then my sweet boy,” She cooed opening her arms,
He happily moved closer and curled up in her arms, his legs over her lap, his head resting against her shoulder, a soft and gentle smile across his lips as she wrapped her arms around him in a gentle and caring embrace,
“So tell me, what has my sweet boy been up to these last few days?” she cooed,
“Well, I attended my royal coronation,” He sighed,
“I saw, you were very handsome,” she smiled stroking his back,
“I was?” he looked up with hope in his eyes,
“Very handsome,” she nodded, “I was very proud of you,”
His tears began to well up in his eyes, “Proud of me…” he muttered,
“I’m always proud of you sweet boy,” she smiled,
“...Thank you, Mommy,” He whispered,
“You’re welcome,” She cooed, “Now, what else have you been up to?”
“Humm… been attending a whole bunch of small council meetings,”
“Ohh, council meetings,”
“It’s all just preparations and precautions with my half-sister and all.” he sighed running his fingers gently through her hair,
“Yes, of course, very important matters to attend to,” she nodded, “Still all very big business for such a sweet boy,” she smiled kissing his forehead,
“You take such good care of me,” He cooed, “My sweet mommy,”
“I know what will cheer you up,” she smiled, “How about… we get you nice and relaxed? Would you like that my sweet boy?” She softly stroked his cheek,
He nodded,
“Use your words, you're a big boy now Aegon.”
“Yes please Mommy,” He nodded,
“Perfect,” She cooed, giving his cheek a little pinch before she moved her hands away and untied the dress from around her choker, the dress slowly fell to her waist revealing her skin in the warmth of the candlelight, her large bare breasts exposed to the air,
“Which side may I mommy?”
“The left today, sweet boy,”
He nodded and softly prepared gentle kisses down her neck, leaving tender bites against her throat, slowly he moved down her chest before reaching the nipple of her left breast, he softly kissed it a few times, pressing kisses around the nipple. He gently and slowly flicked his tounge against her nipple to harden it before finally he locked his lips around the nipple and began his gentle and slow sucks,
“Not too quickly now, we don’t want you to get hiccups.” She reminds,
But he didn’t respond, his eyes fluttering shut as he gently sucked until he let out a soft groan as he tasted her milk, he quickly swallowed and began to suck harder.
“Such a sweet boy, being so soft and gentle for Mommy,” she cooed stroking his cheek,
He nodded as he continued to suckle, his hands around her waist playing with her hair looping and knotting it around his fingers as he drank,
Ellisa only smiled wrapping her arms around him and gently rocking them both back and forth like you would a newborn as they feed, and softly she began to sing,
“I loved a maid as sweet as spring, with flowers in her hair. I loved a maid as fair as summer, with sunlight in her hair. I loved a maid as red as autumn, with sunset in her hair. I loved a maid as white as winter, with moonglow in her hair.”
Aegon softly pulled away from her nipple and rested his head against her chest smiling up at her, “But I love this maiden most of all, for she is as sweet as springtime flowers. As far as the summer sun. She is better than a sunset sea and of Moonglow Moore. I love this maiden in my arms, and I shall until I fall.” he softly sang, “And I do… I do truly love you Ellisa,”
“As I you, Aegon,” she cooed giving his lips a soft and tender kiss, “You should get back to the keep sweet boy, they will wonder where you are.”
He sighed but nodded, slowly sitting up and fixing his clothes a little. “I wish I could keep you in my arms for all time, you are far kinder to me than you have any need to be. Even my own mother is not as kind to me as you,”
“Well, I’m always here if you need me, no matter what.”
“I need you.” He said taking her hand, “I need you always.”
“You must go your grace,” she reminds,
“I must…” he sighed, “I will be back to visit again soon,”
“I look forward to it,” she smiled squeezing his hand before he got to his feet,
But he turned back before their hands broke apart, “If anything is coming, anything is to happen. I will send word as soon as I know, I will send men and they will protect you. Take you far from danger. I swear this to you Ellisa.” He said falling to his knees at her bedside,
“Sweet boy,” She cooed stroking his cheek, “My place is here, with you. And I will stay here by your side until the long night claims us all,”
“You mean it?”
“I do,” she nodded,
“You have… alot of faith in me.”
“Of course I do sweet boy,” she smiled kissing his forehead, “I have nothing but faith in you.”
He smiled and softly kissed her hand before kissing her lips once more, “I’ll see you soon,”
“I’ll see you soon,” she nodded,
Before Aegon sighed, got to his feet and left to head back to the Keep. 
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riansdiary · 4 months ago
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My Manifesting Success Stories
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Dearest Gentle Reader.
I am here with another inspired post! Now what am I talking about? I don't post everyday and force myself to create content because I find that when I do that, it's missing something. They tend to end up being mediocre (not like I can't write up something but I don't wanna force myself to post something when I don't feel like it or when I'm not inspired) so I wanted to only post when I'm inspired and excited to write something that will help someone like right this moment!
I like to write when I'm inspired and my posts all end up becoming the best when I do it that way.
I'm writing this up not only because it will help and inspire you all but I also wanted to record and keep track of my every or most of my success stories so I can remember how powerful I am! How amazing I am and how I'm a master at manifesting! Sometimes you just need to remind yourself what you've accomplished to feel proud and to end doubts. It's also great to keep records of it for my own amusement. I will make another post for my next ones.
Let's just get right through with it! These are all my real success stories but it is really a fact that whatever you want is meant for you. I hope this helps inspire everyone or at least have fun reading!
Note: All I did to manifest these are literally just affirming/deciding and commanding my subconscious like a boss or a queen. I have a new post that I wrote about that, check it out here. I also left the 3d alone and assigned good meanings to it. I persisted and stood firm in my decisions. I only affirmed/decided naturally, casually and in a boss/queen way for a few times. I really mean like about 4-5 times during the day or whenever I thought of it. The most I did was probably just 7 or 8 times. Again, You can read more about my favorite signature method here.
This is what I usually affirmed or said in my mind to manifest. I just decide and command my subconscious mind and my reality like a boss. Like it's my employee. My words are law.
Example: Food
"I'm deciding that Mom's gonna cook this dish. Subconscious mind, I command you to make that happen. Get me this food. I'm not changing my decision ever, It is already done. It's a fact."
I embodied Hong Haein from Queen of Tears and Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl when I affirmed or decided. Think how Hong Haein orders everyone in her department store. She's the boss and what she says, goes. Think how Blair Waldorf commands her minions. That's how you need to do it, stand firm on your decision and persist. Only do it if it resonates with you but this is what helped me to persist so I know this will be really helpful to everyone. I used to easily give up and wavering like a freaking ocean. I became a master at manifesting because of that mindset change. Your desires are meant for you. You already have it in the 4d as soon as you want it. It will materialize in the 3d but that is just a bonus or a cherry on top because it's already a fact even before it did.
1. My parents coming home with my desired food or snack. 🍟
I manifested tons of things this way. I manifested my favorite orange juice, McDonald's fries, a snack that I'm craving and more. I just affirmed a few times. Not even more than 10 times and persisted. Sometimes it's commanding my subconscious mind. The time when I started to learn about the law of assumption, I wavered and gave up too early but now it's very easy for me to do.
So there was a time when I was craving for a specific orange juice that is my favorite but my parents don't know which brand. They know that I like orange juice but not down to the brand. I was sitting on my bed and I was trying commanding my subconscious after reading a post about that here on Tumblr.
I said: "Subconscious mind, I command you to get me some Minute maid orange juice. It's my favorite orange juice. Thanks." That's all then when my dad came back, guess what he placed on the floor? A WHOLE ASS BOX OF MY FAVORITE ORANGE JUICE!!! I only commanded my subconscious and trusted it! I only did that once! This is still one of my favorite success stories.
2. No soda diet no more! 🥤
Okay so my mom wanted us to stop drinking coke and instead drink water. I get it, water is good for you. I do like water but I miss the fizz and flavor of coke. It's refreshing! I also have a placebo for that. Drinking coke will make me and my loved ones perfectly healthy. I know it doesn't make sense but that's a placebo! Most of them don't make sense or sound crazy but it is what you think it is. If you think it works then it works.
I only affirmed whenever I thought of it. Again, not even that much.
"No, mom will start buying coke again and that never happened. We're gonna be able to drink it again."
I kind of compromised and decided on Sprite because I like it as well and it's kind of healthier than coke so I affirmed:
"Mom is gonna come home with a big bottle of Sprite. It's done."
Then low and behold, Mom comes back from the store and guess what she came home with? YES! A bottle of Sprite! This is definitely a success story because we were gonna stop drinking coke. If Mom wanted some coke, even just a small bottle, she can get it. And yet she came home with Sprite instead just like how I wanted.
3. Manifesting my Kpop Idol boyfriend 💕
Now this is a big manifestation! This is actually an SP one. Yes, he is a popular idol but for our privacy, I shall keep it strictly vague.
This is what I mean that you literally can manifest anything you want in the world. Anything you want. Whether that's a fictional character, a superpower, an ability from anime (I'll tell you about it in a sec), shifting, a unicorn and whatever floats your boat! You can do it! If you want it, it is meant for you and you already have it in the 4d. Your subconscious mind knows what you want and instantly manifests that in the 4d then the 3d naturally.
I wanted Mukoda from Campfire Cooking in Another World with Absurd Skill's online grocery ability. Instead of just grocery though, it has everything that's available out there in the market. It's all free for me and my fingerprint is enough payment. Why? Because my existence alone is a valid reason to get everything I want. Everything we want is meant for us anyway. I wanted it to have an appearance change section, a profile section where I could change everything about me and my loved ones (mostly for full health purposes) and it has a section for food, drinks, snacks, desserts, skincare, makeup, hair stuff and the list goes on. I also wanted a feature where I could change the country. I could buy anything from anywhere! Imagine getting fresh macarons or clothes from Paris instantly! You could say this is in the process but for me I already have it in the 4d and it's already done.
I saw him for the first time on a video and it was love at first sight. He felt so familiar and like I already know him so well even though I've only seen him a few times. When I look at him, he makes me feel so calm, comfortable and at home. I feel so connected to him. It always feels like our hearts are magnets. I just feel so drawn to him. That's how I felt when I was seeing and watching him in the past. Literally when I first got into his group, that's what I said about him. I then find out years later than he's my soulmate. Tadah! 😱🎉❤️ I could have manifested that too or not. Now, I see his name everywhere, so many similarities and we tend to mirror each other a lot. I see his promotional poster ads with his group a lot at our local malls for a brand they are working with. We are both open to sharing our feelings to each other and we have literally cried/got emotional just because we had eye contact. We love each other so much that things like that happen almost daily. I get song messages from his higher self as soon as I wake up. This does not happen everyday though. It's usually songs that I don't listen to much and songs that are not ones that I always sing in my head. I get them as soon as I wake up or go to the bathroom. Just felt like giving you guys some basic information.
I followed Hyler's advice from one of her older videos and just assumed that he's my boyfriend and it's already done. Whenever I watched his videos, I assumed he was my boyfriend and thought like I'm his girlfriend. I aligned my thoughts to being his girlfriend. Fast forward to now, we are happily dating. He's always doing things on a live or a music show for me. It's our secret signals. It's basically gestures that means he knows I'm watching. He does whatever gestures he knows I like. A specific heart pose, a specific gesture about us or pointing at the camera (not the normal one. He's doing it with intention. He has a specific facial expression when he does it. It's like he's saying "This is for you. I know you're watching, love"
It's either something I asked him to do or we both decided on it. It's always obvious when he does it. All I did was change my thoughts to align with the reality I wanted to be in and it's done! He has written lyrics about me as well. He's always in my dreams especially when it's a scary one. He appears at the end of it as if he's making me forget about that and making me remember just him. He's constantly in my dreams though, again usually by the end of it so I tend to remember him more than other things because of that! His members know about me and always just hand him the phone or Ipad, whatever they were using to read comments, whenever they first see my comments and it's just the cutest thing ever. He sometimes slips up when it comes to saying goodbye. They were doing a special holiday live once. When they were saying goodbye and ending the live, instead of greeting the fans with the exact greeting for that holiday, he ended up saying "I love you". It's a different way of saying that but I wanna keep it vague for my privacy. It's the way we usually say I love you to each other so it's special. He also posts pictures with the exact emoji that sounds exactly like my name. The emoji is how you pronounce it but it's spelled a different way. Like 🍒 or 🍎 or 🌹. There are people in the world who are named Cherry, Apple or Rose.
Anyway, I love him so I ended up going on a tangent! You can manifest anyone you want to be your boyfriend whether they're fictional, look like a character you like or a boyfriend who's the carbon copy of an idol you like or your favorite member. Mine is the real one so now you know, you're powerful as f*ck and can get whatever you want. Your desires are meant to be yours and I hope that this is a good example or a proof of that. This is me re-reading to check for spelling mistakes: 😭🥰🤭
4. Manifesting being featured in Subliminal Amino ⭐
I posted my new manifesting success stories here and also on Amino. Now, not everyone can get featured. You only get featured when your blog is approved and if it's good and helpful.
All I did was my signature techniques but it's really as simple as this: "Oh My God! I got featured! Thank you!"
That's it. That was my affirmation and I only did it once or twice. I decided that it's final that I got featured. I said it like a boss. I'm getting featured because I said so. It's already done.
Did I check the 3d and dig up the seeds I planted? No! I didn't care about it, I didn't check because again, I decided I have it so I do. I looked at people liking my post but that was all. I played some games, cleaned the pee of one of our puppies on the floor and just did fun stuff on my phone. I went back to Amino to see the notifs I got. One notification says "featured!" And it was from an admin! They also replied to me and told me that I am really the star of my reality. I literally did other things for a few minutes then I got featured!
5. I manifested not getting any side effects from the vaccine and the jab being quick and painless 💉
I came with my mom to get the vaccine. I was kind of fidgety and nervous, and would rather be at home at that moment. I used to be scared of injections but I manifested some courage for myself and it being done fast and painless. I felt like a superhero or a powerful person when any of the injections I had were done. I was smiling proudly at my family. This was not the vaccine I'm talking about, it's when I got sick. It was really cold at that time and I got pneumonia.
I manifested four things in one go. Me not getting any side effects I heard that people were having. The vaccine is done fast and painless, the long ass line going faster and faster. Closer and closer to where we receive the vaccine. Lastly, my mom is allowed to accompany me. I was scared so I needed some support from Mom. These are what I affirmed naturally as we were in the line:
"The line is going faster! It will be finished in a jiffy (My favorite Nancy Drew movie word 😇)!
"It's gonna be painless and I will absolutely not have any side effects!"
I also did a thing where I walked like a model and assumed that I have my ideal face, ideal hair and ideal body! I kinda visualized it a little bit! We had to do two doses like everyone and both were done fast and were completely painless for me. I compared it to an ant bite. Just a slight pinch.
6. I manifested to look like Tzuyu from Twice
The only thing I did to manifest this was to listen to subliminals and started thinking that I look like her. People in Amino have always said that I look like Tzuyu (after using the subs) and here's some proof of that.
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7. A Unicorn 🦄
I'm not talking about a real unicorn though that would have been such a great manifestation success story! This happened recently. I wanted to prove to myself that I'm powerful more and more everyday so I asked my subconscious to show me a unicorn. It could be the word or a picture of it. I was manifesting to see cute things to empower myself and to make them pile up to give me more assurance about my manifesting skills.
I was watching new TikToks about the new Despicable Me movie and I heard Gru say "that's not actually a true unicorn" and I knew that was my manifestation. I literally just got Despicable Me stuff on my FYP, looked more into it because I love those movies and it led me to see that exact TikTok.
8. Saw a pink butterfly 🦋
These are just manifestations to prove to myself that I'm a master at manifesting. I told my subconscious to show me a pink butterfly. It didn't show me a real one but I didn't specify that it needs to be a real one. I went general for it. I've seen this three times. One when I was reading Subliminal Amino posts, two while I'm on Pinterest and lastly at home. My mom suddenly has these cute decorative shiny shimmering butterflies and one of them was pink. I've seen them before while Mom was digging up some moving boxes and storage we have from the old house. This time though, it's just the pink butterfly on our coffee table! I was looking for my other phone and I saw that!
9. Having a ribbon to tie my hair with. This is a very special one!
I loved watching A Series of Unfortunate Events on Netflix. I really liked Violet as a character and she does this specific thing to get her brain gears working. She ties her hair with a ribbon or cloth or whatever is available to her and whenever she does that, she ends up thinking of a plan. Here, let me show you what I mean:
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I wanted to have one like that so I can use it as a placebo to make me smarter than I already am. I'm already intelligent but I found that doing that hair ribbon trick, can help me solve problems and to brainstorm great ideas. So I commanded my subconscious mind. I was starting to learn this method thanks to @nonbinarydeity for her simplifying manifesting post!
I told my subconscious: "Subconscious mind, I command you to get me a ribbon for my hair so I can use it like Violet. I want it to be pink."
I said that once or twice then proceeded to fully trust that my subconscious mind is manifesting/getting that done for me.
I was searching through the stuff on my shelves and storage areas where I have my stuff from the old house. I looked through them and saw this small blue magnetic box container thing. I thought that it had my cartomancy playing cards. We had a couple of those because it's free stuff from a company that a relative was working with. It's the box I'm talking about. I opened it and to my surprise, I saw that it was full of ribbons and hair clips! Not only that, there was a specific soft pink one that I used to do that I was talking about which was Violet Baudelaire's hair tie trick. I used that ribbon like years ago and so I forgot about it. I had these storage boxes at the old house but they are hard to open because there is stuff on top of it. There's no way for me to pull it out. I decided to open it as much as I can and get some of my old stuff. I got my books, old jewelry, an assortment of things then I grabbed that blue magnetic box thinking it contained my cards but actually my cards are in another container close to my bed.
My subconscious mind did not only get me what I wanted but it got me my pink favorite old ribbon that I got specifically to do the thing that Violet does in the show. It's the one I specifically had for that purpose years ago.
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This is definitely one of my favorite success stories!!!
10. Made my straight hair go curly and a bit wavy
My hair used to be straight as heck and I was happy with it but I wanted to make just a slight change. I want my ends to be wavy or curly. You see, I was jealous of my younger sister's hair. She had curly ends and it's so pretty! That's what I wanted to have. I want to keep the top to mid part of my hair straight and the ends more wavy. So I used a subliminal from glow soul, her hair sub and all I did was listen once while looking at pictures of my desired hair. I was already seeing the ends of my hair starting to curl and become a bit wavy. It was more solidified to me that it was actually working when my mom and my sister kept noticing how the ends of my hair were becoming more wavy and curly. There was this one time when we were at a mall, I was walking in front of my mom and my sister. My sister told our mom that the ends of my hair are curling and getting wavier. I didn't do anything to my hair at all! I just combed it before going and that was it! This really makes me happy and I still have those results! Let me show you my hair before and the photo I looked at while listening.
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This is the photo I looked at while listening to the sub:
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11. Being spoiled by everyone 🛍️
I used another subliminal for this and it is laveria's very popular "get gifts n get spoiled" subliminal! When I started listening to this, my mom kept buying me things from online that I really liked. This was in the past when we had a tight budget but we suddenly got richer and got a new car after I listened to a rich subliminal! Mom was then able to buy me stuff or ask me what I want in the shop she's shopping at online because of those two subs! My dad also gave me extra allowance money to buy whatever I wanted! My brother bought us snacks that I wanted for so long (they don't know) like cakes and macarons! This is the most recent one! My sweet little sister bought me tons of books whenever she shops at amazing book fairs with her girlfriend. She literally got me books in genres that I love like detective, mystery, fantasy and more! She didn't do that much before unless it was my birthday. She even gave me As Old As Time as a one month early birthday gift! I recommend that book so much! I finished it so fast! I also got a lot of money from relatives.
12. Found my ear hook that I lost 👂
Okay so the wired earphone that I was using during that time always fell out of my ears so my mom got me ear hooks. It's a silicon accessory that has a hook that you can hang on your ear so earphones won't fall out. They look like this:
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I basically lost one of them when I woke up and I literally searched every nook and cranny. I commanded my subconscious mind to find it for me and I affirmed "found it!" three times after that. I just trusted that my subconscious mind will get that for me and relaxed. Even if days would come and it hasn't shown up, I never gave up. I continued my day knowing the subconscious will help me find it. One day, my mom was organizing stuff around my bedroom and that's when she gave me my missing ear hook! I have searched everywhere and Mom found it at the area that I have searched multiple times so I knew this was a success story. I shifted to the reality where I found that ear hook.
12. Being better in Among Us
Among Us is one of my favorite games ever, in fact I miss it now. I had to delete it to get more space. As I said, I am really intelligent already but I tend to be nervous and sometimes slip up as the impostor. I'm good at catching impostors but I get nervous and scared when I'm the impostor.
I started listening to an Among us sub and it's about being really good as an impostor. I became a genius at being an impostor. I never got caught ever after that! I have saved some compliments from friends and random people to savor my success story and make me feel amazing! I'll show you in a sec! Me scouring through my messy gallery right now: 🧐
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I've been complimented and called a genius so many times but I can only provide one photo since Tumblr only allows 10 photos per post.
And that is all I can recall from the top of my head. Thank you for reading!
XOXO Rian 💋
Or maybe yours truly, Lady Whistledown 😆
I'm kidding! I'm just enjoying Bridgerton recently! Remember, you already have what you want and it's already done! 🎉
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lupinmoonlight · 1 year ago
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oh if lupin had caught me reading smut about him during his class i think i would have just avada kedavra myself out of embarrassment 😭
Red-handed
Masterlist AO3
Summary - Professor Lupin catches you reading a smutty story about him. He keeps you after class and makes you touch yourself on his desk as he watches (1,642 words).
Warnings - Professor/student, reader masturbating, age gap, jerking off, cum on clothes, mentions of embarrassment, some "good girl", orgasm control, very slight edging, my grammar (english is my second language), not proof-read.
Notes - This fic was inspired by anon! It was a lot of fun to write! I would be so mortified haha. The fic I am referring to in this fic is Sinful if you guys are interested.
You sat in the back row, your quill idle, your heart pounding a frantic rhythm against your ribs. Your eyes weren't on Professor Lupin but on the parchment concealed within the pages of your textbook. You had been careful, oh so careful, not to let anyone see what you had been reading, but the pull of the forbidden words was irresistible. 
You continued reading, your eyes captured by the elegant, looping handwriting that described a scenario that would make even the dirtiest minds squirm. 
A string of curses fell from his lips, "Ah, fuck..." he moaned as thick ropes of warmth spilled onto the lace of your skin, hot and sticky.
Your cheeks burned with a blush that you prayed no one would notice. You were so engrossed in the sinful text that you didn't hear the soft footsteps approaching your desk. 
"Y/N?" Lupin's voice pulled you back to the reality of the classroom, and your heart skipped a beat. "Is everything alright? You seem...distracted."
You snapped the book shut, but it was too late. Lupin's hand was already extended, palm up. "May I?"
Your hands trembled as you handed over the parchment, your eyes fixed on your desk as you muttered, "I'm sorry, Professor. I was just..." 
Lupin unfolded the parchment and his eyes quickly scanned the page. You didn't need to look up to know when he reached the passage you were just reading; the slight hitch in his breath was giveaway enough. For a moment, the room was utterly silent except for the frantic pounding of your heart resonating in your ears. 
When he finally spoke, his voice was calm, but there was an undercurrent of something you couldn't quite identify. "I think we should discuss this...after class." 
You nodded, your mouth dry, unable to form words. 
The remaining minutes of the lecture stretched on interminably. When it finally ended, you remained in your seat, frozen, as your classmates filed out. The door closed behind with the last student with a soft click, leaving you alone with your Professor. 
"Come," he simply said as he climbed the short staircase to his office. 
You stood up, your legs feeling wobbly, and followed him. It felt like the longest walk of your life despite his office being only a few meters away. 
"Please, take a seat," he gestured towards a chair facing his desk. 
You sat, clutching your hands in your lap. 
Lupin leaned back against his desk, his demeanor markedly different from the gentle, approachable Professor you were used to. His eyes, usually warm and understanding, held a depth of seriousness and a flicker of something that looked like...hunger. Something you had never seen in him before. He unfolded the parchment and handed it to you. 
"I'd like you to read a passage for me," he said, his voice low and steady. 
Your hands trembling, you took the parchment. You glanced at the text, your face heating up as you felt like you had lost the ability to speak. 
With a low growl, his hips began moving on their own accord, the desperate grind of his arousal evident in his every movement...the friction, the heat of your body, was intoxicating...
As you read, your cheeks burned with embarrassment. You couldn't believe you were reading these words to Professor Lupin himself. You dared not look up at him, focusing solely on the parchment, absolutely mortified.
"That's enough," he said softly, stepping closer to where you sat. He studied you for a moment, his gaze traveling over your form perhaps a moment longer than necessary, making you squirm uncomfortably. 
"Do you enjoy these stories, Y/N?" he asked, his tone more curious than accusatory. 
Your eyes darted to the floor. "I...I supposed I do, Professor," you admitted, your voice a mere whisper. 
He stared down at you, making you feel like a small, cornered creature perched on the edge of the chair. He tilted his head slightly, a faint hint of a smile playing on his lips. He was enjoying this. 
"Look at me," he commanded gently. 
Reluctantly, you lifted your eyes to meet his. There was no judgement there, only a thoughtful curiosity tinted with something you could only describe as lust. 
"And what is it about these stories that you enjoy so much?"
"I-I don't know, Professor," you stammered.
"You don't know? That's unfortunate...I thought perhaps you could show me," he continued, taking the parchment from your hands. 
"Professor, I-" but before you could finish your sentence, he swiftly hauled you up from the chair and placed you on the edge of his desk, standing right between your legs. 
"Was this part of the story you were reading, Y/N?" he asked, his voice low as he leaned in.
You could only shake your head, the tone of his voice going straight to your loins. 
"Do you want to stop?" he continued as he tilted your chin to look into your eyes. 
"N-No, Professor", you whispered. 
With a low growl, his hands traveled under your skirt, gripping your thighs, pulling you closer. You could feel his arousal pressing against you through his trousers. 
"I want to watch you," he commanded in a husky voice. "Touch yourself for me." 
Your mind went blank. You hesitated, your eyes darting nervously around the dim office before settling on him. His gaze was intense, demanding, and you weren't sure if you were going to combust or simply pass out. 
Tentatively, you slid a trembling hand between your thighs, feeling the dampness of your panties as you pulled them aside to give your fingers access to your heated core. A slight gasp escaped you as you made contact. 
"That's it," he encouraged, his hands starting to unbutton his trousers to free himself from the constricting fabric. You dared looking down, your eyes landing on his hardened length. At the sight, your hand started to move slowly, your fingers dancing in a way you were oh so familiar with. 
He tightened his grip on your thigh, his other hand gripping himself firmly, beginning to stroke in tandem with your movements. "Show me how you like it. Show me what you do when you read those stories about me." 
You responded to his commands, your fingers moving in slow circular motions over your sensitive spot, your breathing growing ragged. The sight of you, spread out on his desk in your uniform and touching yourself at his command, only intensified his arousal.  
"What a good girl," he praised as he continued to stroke himself slowly. "Is this what you do when you're alone? When you think about me?" 
You nodded, your cheeks turning a beautiful shade of pink as he watched you intently. Your movements grew more and more frantic, pathetic whimpers escaping your lips.
Your eyes darted to his, instinctively seeking some kind of permission. He could tell you were close, on the verge of falling apart. 
"You want to come?" he teased, delighting in the desperate whimper you gave in response. "Not yet," he warned, drawing out the pleasure and anticipation. "You'll come when I say so. Do you understand?" 
"Y-Yes, Professor," you whimpered, your eyes closing shut as you fought against the impending climax. 
Watching you, Lupin's grip on himself tightened, the pace of his strokes increasing as he felt himself nearing the edge too. "Beg for it," he commanded suddenly. 
Your body trembled, your movements growing faster. You were dangerously close and you didn't think you could hold back any longer. The only response you could give him was a desperate whimper. 
"You can do better than that. Come on, use your words," he teased, his grip on your thigh now bruisingly tight.
"Please, P-Professor...I can't...I need..." you stammered, unable to form a cohesive sentence. 
He watched you, taking in every twitch of your body, every flutter of your eyes, every ragged breath you took. It was a sight to behold, your desperation to obey him, even as your body yearned for release. 
"Now," he finally growled, his voice strained, "Come for me." 
Your body arched in pleasure, your fingers working frantically, soft moans escaping your lips as you fell apart on the desk. 
The sight of you, so undone, combined with the sound you made as you came was almost his undoing. He leaned closer, his breath hot against your neck, and stroked himself furiously. 
"Ah...fuck," he cursed loudly as the tension finally snapped. After a few hard strokes, his climax tore through him, his seed shooting forth, splattering all over your school uniform in thick, warm strands. He continued to move his hand, his hips jerking reflexively as he milked every last drop of his release.
You were both panting, chests heaving from the intensity of what had just transpired. He took a moment to catch his breath, his forehead resting against yours. 
Covered in him, you looked up at your Professor, trying to recover from your own release. Lupin pulled back slightly to take in the sight of you. 
"That's a good girl," he murmured, "All messy in your uniform..." 
You looked down, the contrast of his white seed on your dark skirt was stark, and it made you feel like you belonged to him, like you were his. 
With a gentle touch, his clean hand reached out, his fingers carefully lifting your chin, coaxing your gaze to meet his. 
"Now, remember to save your reading for after class," he advised, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a way that hinted at a leniency his words didn't fully express. 
"Yes, Professor," you responded, a small, bashful smile playing on your lips.
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phospheneics · 5 months ago
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Girlll I just graduated 🤪 and I am an Aizawa whore so I was wondering if you could write a Aizawa x reader who just graduated. She has been having a crush on him for the longest and a few months after graduating she somehow crosses paths with him and ykyk something blossoms between them ;)
girl, you and me both 🍬
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6:45 am, 8/14
As you made your way through the busy and bustling streets of Musutafu, you found yourself at your local coffee shop once again before your 9-5 shift. Since your graduation from UA 3 months ago, you have just been working an office job in the city while figuring out your career plans. Although studying in the hero course, your heart wasn't really set on becoming a hero. 
After placing your order, you step out of line and take a seat at a small table in the corner. You pulled your laptop out to review your tasks for the day. You do this every morning before you even go into work. You always make sure to get to the coffee shop early so you'll have the time to do this.
As you're going over your tasks for the day, lost in thought, you hear your name being called. 
"Y/N?"
You look up to see none other than your former teacher, Shota Aizawa. His comforting and familiar presence immediately washed over you. His reassuring demeanor was truly what made you fall for him months back. Thinking back on it, you cringe at the fact that you probably made your feelings for him a bit too transparent. 
"Aizawa," you greeted him with a hesitant smile. Your heart begins to race. 
"Good to see you, Y/N. How have you been?" he questions, his tone as gentle as ever. 
His question lingered in the air as you paused to clear your throat. "Fine, fine." You replied. "Still figuring things out, you know?". 
He gives you a reassuring nod at your response, "I can understand that." He says. 
You grab your drink and make your way back over to Aizawa. He takes a seat at your table, and you can't help but feel a bolt of excitement at his proximity. 
"So, how's teaching been going?" You question. 
He chuckles. "Busy as usual," he replies, sipping on his coffee. "But I can't complain. It's what I signed up for."
You nod and shoot him a smile. 
"What about you, Y/N? How's office life treating you?" He asks. 
You hesitate before answering his question. "It's.. okay." You answer. "It's not exactly what I pictured myself doing after graduation though."
Aizawa gives you an understanding nod. His expression is comforting. "I get that," he says. "I'm sure whatever you do will be great." He gives you a smile that makes your heart race.
As you continue your conversation, you take notice of his lingering touches and prolonged stares. You find yourself leaning in a little bit closer to him. The barriers that once separated the two of you from forming a connection have slowly melted away. The undeniable chemistry between you two is no secret. With each subtle glance and shared touch, tension grows between you two. 
As Aizawa leans in, he keeps his gaze focused on your lips. You feel a flutter of anticipation and a hint of nervousness. His presence, though familiar, carries a different weight now that you're no longer his student. You try to maintain your composure, but it's hard to ignore the rush of emotions swirling within you.
Meeting his gaze, you find yourself drawn into the depths of his eyes, searching for any hint of what he might be feeling. His expression is unreadable, yet there's a warmth in his gaze that sends a shiver down your spine.
And then, without another word, he leans into you. His lips brush up against yours with a gentle passion that takes your breath away.  The loud noises of the cafe that once surrounded you two have seemed to fade away.
His warmth washes over you as your lips linger a moment longer. You can taste the coffee on his lips. His embrace pulls you closer as if he's trying to bridge the gap between your souls.
As the intense moment comes to an end, you catch your breath, your eyes meeting Aizawa's. His gaze softens on you as he reaches to brush stray hair out of your face.
"Y/N…, I wish I could've done that a lot sooner." He whispers.
A rush of warmth spreads through you at his words. "Me too" you admit. 
As you both remain in this moment, you are locked in each other's gaze. His touch brought your past feelings back to light. You felt at home with him.
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