#and trying to sabbotage me

[antimony-ore]

I guess I am greatful for burger king because it taught me I can predict most human behavior

[reynaruina]

Ey everyone, sorry for the long abscence. Been dealing w some mental stuff and it kinda snowballed into feeling way too bad about my long bascence to ever come back from it 🙃 but had a talk w my pills med today and I'll be returning to form soon! Got a PILE of stuff to post c:

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TW: Mentioning of csa in the past, fawning, grooming, and repressed memories and sort of self sabbotage, but my ask isn't about the sa in particular. Is it about some weird after math behaviour patterns.

Looking for validation and or advice?

I've been groomed and sa'd as a teen and haven't told anyone back them because I was scared and ashamed. I even tried to hide it.

When it stopped, I repressed all those memories, and years later, I had to work through it, which I'm still currently doing.

Something weird happened lately at work.

An accident occurred, and I think I might have slipped in an old pattern?

I panicked, and instead of doing what would've been the right thing to do, which is immediately to report it and follow the procedure, for my own safeties sake, i tried to hide it. I followed the procedure on my own, but I didn't inform anyone, and I didn't fill out a report. This was not rational brained. I might have even dissociated a bit.

I only took care of the wound and went on with my day completely startled.

Which goes against all I know. The accident is also nothing to get myself in trouble and has no further consequences for happening, But there might be follow-up consequences for my health and, therefore, the insurance since I didn't report it.

So the only mistake with further consequences I made was trying to hide it and dealing with it on my own. Not telling anyone.

It was completely stupid and definitely no behaviour I decided with my rational brain.

I repressed the occurrence for a few days and then suddenly I realised the mess I had brought on myself. And completely panicked.

I reported it then so no worries about that. (Even though i was way too late) But I wanted to know if this is understandable behavior?

Idk I'm angry at myself and scared of how I lost control over my actions sort of. Also scared if there will be further consequences to my health which only time will tell.

This makes me feel kind of helpless and desperate. I feel like I sealed my own fate with this. Still trying to be positive.

Hi anon,

Perhaps your past experiences have taught you to hide any sign of potential perceived weakness for the sake of survival. It makes sense especially in a workplace environment to want to avoid opportunities to feel ashamed or humiliated, even if asking for help. Learning to undo trauma responses takes time and it's okay if you have days where you revert to old ways - that's just part of moving forward. Being angry with yourself is not conducive to learning and growing, but it's worth exploring where that anger is coming from. This slip-up does not define you, your tenacity does.

-Bun

[nityarawal]

9/21/2024

Orphan States

(DEAD-NAMING; NOT A PROBATE)

Morning Songs

Are You From California

The Orphan State

Or New York

Stolen From Paris

By Jewish Parents

Are You From Another

Universe

My Beloved Orphan

You Belong

Forty Thousand

Bartered And Sold

Annually

In California

Attys Couldn't Get

Enough

Forty Thousand

Bought And Sold

California Has A

Gluttony

They Want Our

Babies

They Want Our

Moms

Got A Fuzzy Bunny

From The Universe

And It Says No

Robert Presley Detention

Center

We're Filling Up

With Fluff

Mommies Caged

After Gay Rapes

Starved For Wholesome

Love

Diana Zeppeda Was Kicked 

Around

Like A Chihuahua 

Naked

A Dyke Cop Poked

Out Her Glass Eye

Ball 

Diana Was Trafficked

In Prison

Whilst Her Kids

Were Raped

Groomed By

Gays

Incest

She Got Conjugal

Visits

Every Weekend

From Her Abuser

X Husband

Kicked Around

Naked In

An Apartment

For Court

Amber Got Raped

In A U-Haul

By A Gay Officer's

Son

She Bloated To Over 300

Pounds

On Big Pharma

Serving

As A Jail Maid

Trying To Go Home

To Her Marijuana

Farm

A Jewish Teacher

Lost Her Baes

To A Principal

Only Toddlers

We're They Invitros

Did He Have Buyers

Remorse

In Trans Gender Affirming

Terrorism

Like So Many

Attys In Divorce 

Court

We Couldn't Believe

My X Got A Pound

Of Meth

Fed Exed

But Trans Vampires

Will Seduce The Best

Of Them

A Slave For Beyul

Club

Chris Attwood

Christopher Stapleton

And Christopher

Sunnen

What's With 

Defaming The Chris

Club

Christopher Gannon

Chris Lord

Chris Hall

Chrissy Dear Heart

My Marine

Bro

In Braids

You Gonna Trans

Widow Me

Already 

'Cuz I'm Not A

Probate

Chrissy In French 

Braids

Did You Get A 

Marine Job

Feeling Like A Big 

Man

On Your Own

Marijuana Farm

Chrissy I Saved

You From Fires

Prayed On My

Past Birthday

Visits

Chrissy I Saved

You From Fires

All You Heathens

Trashed My Family

For  Princess

Bribes

Chrissy I Saved

You From Fires

I Went Skiing 

Chrissy How Could

You Get The

Dyke Discrimination Dammers To

Terrorise Me

Chrissy I Had

Your Back

After The Cage

Chrissy You Sold

Out The Likes

Of Me

Chrissy You Tried

To Sabbotage

The Sisterhood

Chrissy The Girls

Spoke

And Will Be Free

Chrissy

You Broke My

Heart

Baptizing Sunil

In Your Boys' Club

With Stirling Bros

Chrissy

These Attys Gotta'

Be Put To Rest

Chrissy 

Get The "T"

Back In Your Name 

Chrissy

We Mean It

Christopher 

Where's The

Christ

Chrissy Get The

"T" Back In

Your Name

Please

Chrissy Get The Tea

Back For Us

Today

Peace

Chrissy Let's

Go To Nitsa Pizza

Chrissy

Send Hollie

Isha June

And Whomever

You've Dead

Named In My

Family

With Anjali

And Put The Seance

To Rest

The Dojo Failed

At Best

Put The Doje

To Rest

Rapes Are No

Tribute

"O" It Out

And Refund 

Moms First

And Foremost

For The Ultimate

Karmic Love

Refund Moms

First And Foremost

Leave Britney

Spears Dad's Legs

Alone

Refund Moms

First And Foremost

Stop Substituting 

Heroines

Like Melinda Gates

With Tranny

Ghosts

No Bargains

No Pleas

No Deals

With Ella Emhoff On

Her Knees

No Bargains

No Deals

The Pope And

I Demand

Cease

Fire Please

Sunil Christopher

Rawal

Catholics

Leave Our Families

Alone

From UK

To Encinitas 

Alan Silverman

And Whomever

You've Deadnmamed

With The Cohen 

Clan

Release Us

Merci

Peace And Love Eternal,

Nitya Nella Davigo Azam Moezzi Huntley Rawal 

Encinitasbeachhome.com 

[theuniverseawakens347]

ME TRYING TO GET MAKE UP AND MODELING JOBS AND ALL PPL SENT MY WAY BY LEE.. VIVICCA SABBOTAGED BEFORE AND AFTER GETTING MY WORK.. interesting GOD MOM AUNTY VI.. PAULA SKIN SUIT WE REPLACED YOU … cause it looks like IM SIGNING ppl up right, and asking for sex offers and other shit right!??

[blueeandyellowmakesgreen]

no thoughts head empty, just pristine by snail mail beinga byler will pov song. every verse hits tbh, I mean.../pristine, untraced by the world outside you/oblivious ass mike. same night, same humility for those that love you, anyways. mike being a douche to both will and el, people who love him the most.there´s a bunch of other lyrics that fit, but the bridge and outro are it for me. 1) if it´s not supposed to be, then I'll just let it be. 2) and out of everyone, be honest with me...this bridge, my god. 1) will´s selflesness coming through, he just really lets it be, ever since s3 he´s been brushing his own feelings all for someone who has been, not great, and just lets it go, or tries to. 2) and still, after mike being a douche to him, he´s still there, that´s his comfort person, all of s4, all of like 6/7 of their conversations are about mike going off on will, and he just lets him, if that´s what he can get, he´ll conform with heart to hearts where he just gets to listen to mike´s problems, a moment of honesty for his own self sabbotage. now, the outro. 1) and we can be anything, even apart. 2) and out of everything, it doesn´t have to be this hard. 3) and I could be anyone but I´m so entwined... 4) no more changes, I´ll still love you the same. so. first firts. 1) this whole thing is just about self secrifice huh? their whole dynamic fits w this, but also this last part feels just like the van scene, he´ll conform with whatever, he just wants to get it all out of his chest, even if he´s hiding behind a lie, a love confession disguised as someone else´s, something that may finally rip the bandaid off, at least for will, something that he hopes keeps whatver it´s going on, apart. 2) I feel like this are his inner thoughts, even withouth a script, you see it on his face, just finish it, ript if off, act cool, it´s not that hard...3) ok so, he´s literally playing somebody else in his whole confession, he´s playing el, trying to tell mike her feelings, but he´s really in the middle of it, isn´t he? poor will. and finally, 4 )that´s it for him, he ripped the bandaid, or so he thinks, that´s it for his part, he feels he canpt do more, he wonpt make a move, he won´t change anything or get his hopes up, but the love was there and it still is. anyways, long ass essay , something abt me is that any song that goes in the byler playlist needs it´s own 100 page analysis, night.

absolutely right, everyone is now obligated to add this song to their respective byler playlist and think about this ask

[literaticat]

Any advice for an author feeing held back by ‘imposter syndrome’ self-sabbotage type issues?

If it makes you feel any better - many (most??) authors struggle with ‘imposter syndrome’ -- even people who you think are wildly successful. It’s just... part of the gig, I think. 

Part of the solution, it seems to me, is to work on not comparing yourself to other writers. Everyone, for better or for worse, is on their own path. So like, if you find that your negative feelings swirl around things like “I should have done X by this age” or “I’m a failure because I haven’t done X” or what have you -- respectfully, I’d say, KEEP YOUR EYES ON YOUR OWN PAPER. There is no such thing as what you SHOULD do, or fixed timeline for when XYZ happens. Other authors appear to have it all together on social media, because it’s social media -- a curated picture of what they want you to see. It’s easy to celebrate the wins publicly -- but the reality is, for EVERYONE, those Wins are couched in a lot of shite. That is, a lot of waiting, a lot of disappointments, a lot of work, and a lot of rejection -- and generally, stuff that is just not particularly interesting or inspiring to post on Instagram, you know? So if THAT’S the problem, where you are like “omg nobody else is dealing with all this _____” -- yeah, they are, it’s just they can’t take a cute pic of those things.

If it’s more of a “perfectionism” thing -- where like, you feel that if you can’t do something perfectly, why bother to do it at all? Or, you do try something, it comes out “bad” and so you consider it a fail, and so you give up? Or, you are self-sabotaging by thinking “well I *could* enter this contest or query this agent... but they will probably say no, so I should procrastinate until it is too late or avoid it altogether” -- well, to that I say... do it anyway! 

NOBODY WRITES GOOD FIRST DRAFTS. The heart of writing great books -- and where the magic is! -- is in REWRITING. So you mustn’t be afraid to put down utter crapola at first -- you’ll make it better if you have something to work with, but if you have nothing to work with, you’re in an impossible situation. 

EVERYONE IS SCARED. But if you don’t have the courage to submit that manuscript, it hasn’t a hope to be published, so... that courage is just a muscle that will get stronger the more you use it, and you have to use it. 

CONFIDENCE IS KEY! Agents (and readers) only know what you tell them. So if you tell me “I know I’m not a professional and this probably isn’t very good” -- which, by the way, lots of people sadly DO say in their query letters :-( -- well, I have no choice but to believe it, and that’s a pass. You’re scared, OK - don’t tell me that! You aren’t feeling like a “professional” yet - but act like one, and I’ll assume you are one. Fake it till you make it!

Also, listen to this podcast where I talked to my friend, bona fide genius author Laurel Snyder, about Imposter Syndrome among other things. I don’t remember what we talked about exactly, but I’m sure she had some wise words: 

https://www.jenniferlaughran.com/literaticast/episode-one-were-all-imposters

[tren-fraszka]

Five Figure Fanwork Exchange 2020 Letter

Dear creator,

Thank you for taking your time to check my requests. I know my requests can sound a bit tricky, but please don’t be discouraged. I wish you will have good time writing first and foremost!

My AO3 is Tren, if you wish to check it out.

Likes: comedy, casefics, canon compliants, AUs, time loops, bodyswaps, roleswaps, “being hoisted by your own petard” plotlines, snark, pettiness, rivals, enemies to friends to lovers, violence, friendships, and character bonding,

DNW: explicit sex (makeouts and fade to black is okay), A/B/O, mpreg, rape depicted as positive (so no “it’s okay, because the other person enjoyed it/it was what they truly wanted”), trans headcanons, soulmate AUs, stories ending with surrender to fate/destiny, fourth wall breaking in canons where that doesn’t occur, character has cancer or other real-life terminal disease AU, word “queerplatonic”.

Also, I included what ships I’m okay with in each fandom. Please do not include any ships that aren’t canon and I have not allowed in those sections (if you feel really strongly about a ship I haven’t mentioned, you can always ask through mods just in case).

Additionally, while I almost never request fanart as possible medium, because I prefer my main gift to be fic, I would be very okay with receiving fanart treats. On another note, feel free to use my old letters if you get your hands on them. I never stop being interested in fandoms, and if I requested something once I will still want it in the future.

                                             REQUESTS

MARIMASHITA! IRUMA-KUN

I read new manga chapters as they get translated so feel free to incorporate anything from the manga that’s available in english. I’m not spoiled for anything beyond that, so please no spoilers for future developments.

Kiriwo Amy/Suzuki Iruma

There are many good ships with Iruma, but this one just has a lot things I like.  I love enemy ships with both sides being way too emotionally invested into each other so this was inevitable. I love how this relationship starts as this really wholesome friendship and school festival preparation, except Kiriwo turns out to be a bit messed up and wants to blow up everyone. But then they both accept the outcome and go on with their lives still thinking about each other. Iruma goes through a lot of trouble to keep the club operating even though Kiriwo has been pretty much expelled. And then Kiriwo is now obsessed with Iruma as his anthitesis and perfect enemy.

I’m okay with the potential story happening at any point in the canon. I would love both a story set before the festival while Kiriwo is still hiding his true colors or a story set after festival. Maybe Iruma runs into Kiriwo somewhere after he escapes prison and instead of calling an adult, he tries to stop Kiriwo from causing trouble on his own. As for pre-festival story. Maybe some upperclassmen steal important parts from the club and Iruma and Kiriwo set out to get them back.

Naberius Kalego & Suzuki Iruma

I love Kalego for being a much better take on Snape than original Snape ever was. The second the series made Kalego Iruma’s familiar I knew this was about to get good. And it was. I love how Kalego slowly warms up to Iruma, even if he is still allergic to his and Sullivan’s antics. I love that Kalego is actually a competent teacher who cares about his students, even if he would rather eat a whole lemon than admit it out loud.

For prompts, maybe Sullivan ends up having an important business and Opera isn’t available so he dumps looking after Iruma on Kalego for a few days. Or Iruma is struggling with studying since so much is new for him so Kalego ends up forced to help him catch up with the material (if you are following manga inclusion of Balam is always welcome). Or maybe Iruma gets into usual trouble ends up stranded somewhere and the only one he can call for help is his familiar.

AUs and ships

I love the worldbuilding around the demon world, so I would ask that if you decided to write an AU that it still incorporates demons. I would definitely love an AU where rather than getting summoned to demon world, Iruma accidentally summons either Kiriwo or Kalego into the human world. Maybe Iruma’s parents try to use him as an offering, but instead he ends up bound to a demon. I would love to see Kiriwo excited to unleash suffering (even if his weak powers severely limit him in that regard) onto human world just to discover that he made contract with the biggest pacifist possible. Or Kalego being torn between wanting to return home as soon as possible (he has classes to teach!) and wanting to somehow help the weird human child that just keeps getting into trouble. Any other demon-focused AU is also welcome. I’m also fine with any sort of AU divergences scenario. Maybe Iruma keeps accidentally sabbotaging Kiriwo’s terrorist plans without realizing it. Or Iruma ends up summoning Kalego more often as his familiar when he gets into trouble.

As for ships, I’d rather avoid any love triangle scenarios for this canon, so please focus on just one pairing per character (competing for Iruma’s attention is normal for this canon, I’d just rather not see outright romantic competition). It’s self-explainatory for Kiriwo request, but if you want to include some shipping elements into the Kalego request I also ship Iruma/Ameri, Iruma/Alice and Kalego/Balam.

RE:ZERO

I watched the first season of anime, as well as the two OVA, and I’m now following the second one. Please don’t include any spoilers for events that haven’t been yet adapted. I’m fine with mentions of stuff from Light Novel that adaptation has skipped, just please make sure to establish them properly.

Natsuki Subaru & Beatrice  Natsuki Subaru & Felix Argyle & Julius Euclius & Reinhard van Astrea  Natsuki Subaru & Puck 

I love how many great interactions Suberu has in Re:Zero with various people, not just Emilia. Feel free to mix my requests or include any other characters, I love all of them.

Natsuki Subaru & Puck

I adore how Subaru immediately gets along with Puck due to their shared admiration of Emilia. I would love a story where the two of them decide to work together to throw a surprise party for Emilia or to make a present for her. Or maybe they need to work together to protect Emilia against a threat. Or for something lighter, their shared adventures of pranking everyone they can in Roswaal’s manor. Feel free to include as much Emilia as you need for this relationship, since Puck is contracted with her.

Natsuki Subaru & Felix Argyle & Julius Euclius & Reinhard van Astrea

I immediately loved the queen candidates’ knights and the relationships between them. I would greatly enjoy seeing them work together. Maybe someone is plotting to harm queen candidates and they join forces to bring them down. Or maybe the queen candidates are busy with some bureaucracy and the bored knights decide to spend a night at town, which ends with all sorts of shenanigans. Maybe Subaru and Julius decide to have some sort of competiton that hilariously goes out of control. Or Reinhardt and Subaru rope everyone into helping some poor grandma, but her straightforward request ends up becoming much more difficult to execute than anyone predicted. Alternatively, Felix, Julius, and Reinhardt decide that Subaru has been pushing himself way too much recently and with silent blessing from Emilia they drag him into the local hot springs to make him finally rest a bit and make sure that give Felix plenty of time for some additional magical treatment.

Feel free to also include Aldebaran into the group if you want. He had very little screen time in anime, so I didn’t want to make this request more difficult than it already is, but if you want to write him too I would be very happy with his inclusion.

Natsuki Subaru & Beatrice

Beatrice is a fascinating character. She’s clearly very powerful, but ends up hiding herself in the library due to her strongly hinted tragic past. Watching Subaru try to make her open up more to him and other people is very interesting. I would love to see more of his attempts to befriend Beatrice. Maybe he suggests they do a book club and makes Beatrice choose books they should read. Or alternatively Subaru ends up trapped inside a magical book and Beatrice is the only one who can help navigate him so he can escape from it. Or alternatively a witch cultist invided the Roswaal mansion and Subaru and Beatrice need to work together to find and neutralize the threat.

AUs and ships

I would prefer no setting changes for this story, any other AUs are fine. I especially love Subaru’s reset mechanic, so feel free to abuse that if you want. If you want some AU ideas, maybe another character starts remembering bits and pieces of the reseted timelines. Or maybe Otto turns out to be a witch cultist in disguise and uses the trust he earned to cause problems.

I’m okay with acknowledging Subaru’s canon crush on Emilia, though I’d rather it wasn’t framed as an endgame ship. I’m okay with pairing Subaru with pretty much any guy in the series (especially other queen candidate knights) or leaving who he will end up with ambiguous.

MY NEXT LIFE AS A VILLAINESS (ANIME)

I watched anime and read manga for this story, so please don’t spoil me for the parts not yet adapted from Light Novel.

Group: Katarina Claes/Gerald Stuart (My Next Life as a Villainess)

I ran into this manga on accident, but I definitely don’t regret it. I love how Katarina ends up solving all the problems in this series either through her efforts or by sheer accident and how she ends up becoming the actual protagonist. This charmingly comedic story has a lot of heart and I crave more.

I think I like Gerard the most out of all potential suitors for Katarina’s heart and would love to see more of his crush on Katarina and unsuccessful attempts at actually wooing her. We only see him through Katarina’s perspective, who can’t separate him from the Gerard she knows from the game, even though he changed under her influence. I would definitely be up for a story where Katarina starts to notice that maybe her idea of Gerard doesn’t exactly line up with the reality. Or maybe she remains blissfully ignorant and decides to go in-depth investigation into finding more of Gerard’s weaknesses, because she saw him do something nice for Maria and now she is sure the end is near for her and she wants to be extra prepared. Or maybe he takes her on a vacation trip to escape from her other suitors, but everything goes terribly wrong (maybe their carriage crashes forcing them to spend the night in the woods), and yet both of them end up having a lot of fun.

I don’t mind including any other characters, since they are a colorful bunch. I read this manga for harem shenanigans, and you are free to include as much of that as you want.

AUs and ships

I’m okay with AUs and canon divergences. The story is already a huge canon divergence after all, so if you want to twist it even more, that’s fine by me. If you want to play around with characters accidentally getting transported to the alternate world where Katarina is the original Katarina or getting a glimps of it, I would be very much for it. I love the idea of Gerard meeting the original Katarina and having all sorts of complicated feelings about her, but ultimately acting kind towards her, because he believes that this is what Katarina he knows would have wanted. And just imagine the utter chaos that would result in two Katarinas running around.

I’m okay with all canonical crushes being acknowledged, however due the nature of my request I want the endgame ship to be Katarina/Gerard. I don’t mind other characters being shipped with each other.

TOWER OF GOD

I’m caught up with the newest chapters of the webtoon.

Khun Aguero Agnis/Twenty-Fifth Baam | Jyu Viole Grace (Tower of God)

I got into this series through anime but then I binged the rest of this webtoon and wow it was a blast. I love the complicated world of the tower, the colorful cast, and the complicated relationships between characters. And I love Aguero for being a total asshole and schemer, who becomes a better person due to Bam’s influence.

I’m fine with the fic being set at any point in the story, whether it be beginning of their relationship right after they both started to climb the tower or anything else down the line. I love the slow change that Aguero goes through starting as the very selfish person who burned most of the bridges behind him into a slightly more caring but still willing to burn all the bridges if it’s for Bam person. Also, Bam’s arc of slowly finding himself through interacting with others is great. For some ideas, maybe they have to go undercover to achieve some goal and end up pretending to be boyfriends to throw off suspicions (bonus points for Khun making their supposed relationship’s backstory more ridiculous each time someone asks about it). Or something goes wrong while they are escaping resulting in Bam and Khun getting chained together with shinsu-resistant handcuffs, which begins their epic journey to find and defeat the person who has key to it. Meanwhile Khun is slowly losing it, because he isn’t prepared to handle someone’s constant presence 24h a day, especially if it’s Bam. Or any other towe climbing shenanigans. Maybe Khun wagers something he really shouldn’t have (like his memories) and the team has to get them back, because Khun regresses into his pre-Bam meeting self and is even more of an asshole than usual.

Please use the names Bam and Jue Viole Grace respectively in the fic, because that was the official translation when I picked up the comics (I’m assuming it was different in the past from the AO3 tag).

AUs and ships

I would prefer no setting changes for this story, Tower is a honestly fascinating place and I want to enjoy more of it, but all other AUs are okay. For some suggestions, maybe Bam doesn’t manage to escape from FUG. Khun finds him and decides that the only way to help is to make sure that Elders acknowledge Bam as a Slayer, so he starts to climb ranks of FUG. 

I’m okay with mentions of Bam’s crush on Rachel, but mostly in the context of his past feelings for her. Just please focus on Bam/Aguero. For some other ships, I’m okay with Anaak/Ran and Anaak/Endorsi. As for other characters, you are free to ship them if you want, just don’t ship Hwaryun with anyone.

[merdibbenj]

I am a kaylor/gaylor blog. I made this blog so I don’t mess up my kaylor aesthetic on my main. I’m also avoiding tons of hate 🤣 But hear me out fam.

The /kaylor troll/metacritic sabbotage event on 8/31 made me curious about Nina Nesbitt. Keypoints:

She’s such a random person to be on the troll anons and on twitter. If the kaylor troll event is connected to the Bottom and Scooper they wouldn’t just use a random person Taylor hasn’t interacted not even once in the last years and Nina has a long term bf btw. Sus. One key point how Nina might have been chosen that I can think of is an anon before. I’m active with kaylor and I recall reading an anon from a mutual turned anti as the kaylordom refers to her /more of a person who questions things which is not a bad thing/ about a girl with pink hair kissing Taylor in London. I have not looked up Nina Nesbitt before the kaylor troll/ back then I thought it was Ruby Rose. This was when? Start of the year? A lot of people had pink hair. Why her? Ruby Rose would be a better choice/ they had recent photos together. Hayley Kioko would be an even better choice/remember the onstage grinding 🤣. Actual lesbian jesus and the snake queen. Instead Scoopy Jokes chose someone I haven’t heard of. Super sus.

Have we stopped and think why this happened? Are we, tumblr kaylors and twitter kaylors that much of an impact to their lives that they sent bots to attack us just to rock our ship? Cuz le bottom is desperate when contract is ending? Taylor and Karlie wouldn’t go bankrupt if we stop shipping. They wouldn’t break up if we stop posting about them on the internet. What our opinions on this situation doesn’t matter to the bottomline. Then who were the attacks for? Metacritic is for Taylor cuz girl gets hurt by critics. The anons and tweets doe. Who are they trying to affect by exposing Taylor hooking up with Nina and Karlie hooking up with everybody after an alleged breakup? Uhhhh, Taylor and Karlie. 🤦‍♀��� If they really broke up, exposing those activities would hurt the possibility of them getting back together and fixing their rs.

What’s there to gain if they wouldn’t get back together from an alleged breakup? Uhhhh a multimillion bearding contract? Uhhhhh satisfaction of Winning? You fckd up $300M everyone knows your dumb ass won’t be earning it back cuz she’ll record them again. this isn’t just business it’s personal. Taking back one thing Taylor likes other than Karlie, control.

Sus sus sus. Botts sending anons here and there then they just stop? Either scoobie and shaggy developed a conscience or they won. They exposed them in an uncontrollable way. Idekk maybe this is part 1 of their plan😭 Just suspicious all over 🤔

Full disclosure, I don’t buy all things this person said 100% cuz threesomes and orgies and prostitutes and fucking someone dressed as your ex /hello/ doesn’t scream like the gal pals I love. I put my foot down there. Periodtttt.

I don’t have any sources like the big blogs. I don’t know if Karlie fckd everyone and if Taylor really fckd Nina but here are coincidences I found. Take off the tinted lover glasses we kaylors have for 5 mins and consider these coincidences I found in the last couple of hours.

Who can volunteer an explanation for this easter egg now that we have the album out? This can be coincidental. Song context of Love Letters is about moving on from someone.

Remember when Taylor used salute to me I’m your American Queen for Karlie’s American Dream line? Nina lives in London, I don’t think that the whole London Boy is writen about her/ its still sarcastic/ but this coincidence in the line stick with me I’m your Queen like a Tennessee Stella McCartney. Something happened in Tennessee. 🤔

How many times was blue mentioned in Lover? We know it’s Joe’s favees. But posting this coincidence before album release. She’s a swiftie but she’s never posted anything 13 related before this.

Nina wrote a song in NYC 2017 called black and blue. She’s playing that song while wearing the Lover palette 🎨 check how their album turned out. The post before is also a random throwback of them. Coincidence.

This coincidence. Sing Daylight with me, Side Stepping Into Monday Like and let it go. This maybe the mother of reaches 🤣 however it sounds like an inside joke about misheard lyrics.

I can do part 2 cuz there’s a ton. I feel like I fell down another rabbit hole again. I know kaylors have great experience with 🕵🏻‍♂️ check the timeline yourselves. I’m not sure when they broke up but it looks recent. Afterglow makes sense and the tweet about Tay sabbotaged PR premier is consistent with this narrative. Maybe they broke up. Is Tay rebounding or did sis cheat? The implication and Kar’s reaction. 🤦‍♀️🤔💔

[dr-piss-thief-phd]

I’m nearly crying over McDonald’s so actually I don’t think I can wait 9 months for therapy

[nityarawal]

@britneyspears Ultimately Gay Stirling Attys smear campaign was probably to marry off many beauties to spies that would extort money/brand/kids in ww3.

It's been gross getting treated to 3rd world facilities of court.

They're functionally obsolete.

PD @jaycuratolo sabbotaged me.

@jaycuratolo declared courts were "broken" in 2018 after 1.5 years of bs trying to mediate and settle.

Then Lori Clark Viviano claimed I had a mental health problem & x's "balls worked fine" & beat me into a hospital for being a realtor.

It was discrimination. @nardotrealtor @VP

At this stage as realtor of 23 years - @Prudential @HomeSmartIntl declare courts functionally obsolete, incapable of real estate law on divorce & Violating term "probate" to murder glorious moms. Yeah kids are scared.

They're turning 18yo & don't want militia murdering pops. @VP

@POTUS You need to mandate arbitration & mediation for all real estate & close court.

@nardotrealtor We need emergency Dissolution from @HomeSmartIntl @Sothebys @Lexus @AAAnews & found violent & grossly mismanaged government.

Fire all judges, officers & clerks on #FreeBritney

6 years of continuances on attys ROs that stole from us is gross mismanagement of funds.

It's like hunger games. We're all starving and many are only getting $20/mo for food screaming hungry! @VP no excuse for 15 years of foul play from gay pedophiles on @britneyspears & my case.

@nardotrealtor We need to close @UnitedWay & mediate all family Court and Probate dissolutions.

We found 100's of rotating judges ro be mentally incompetent at real estate, race, ethics, and timely business.

Fire every judge & clerk on cases. Globe wants America & @goop settling.

@VP You need to come & personally close all Sandiego, Riverside & LA courts.

Nazi Clark family comitted foul play since Walter was DA 50 years ago. He appears responsible for Marilyn adoptions & gross retardation of ex wife Lori Clark Viviano's figure with forced augmentation.

We witness gay community stripping moms of their assets, homes & kids.

They promised us a fair and speedy trial 6 years ago.

At this point we'd call it 6 years of rape & extortion.

You don't have one professional that can manage money & dissolution.

Realtors need to dissolve! @VP

My mediator Scotty Partlow aka @goop @GwynethPaltrow bro is disgusted with legal team.

Not one colleague at court has behaved professionally to dissolve estate courteously so we can move on.

Courts are sabotaging moms careers w/ foul play.

PDs & cops are functionally obsolete.

Moms require mediation globally from moldy Stirling boys club infiltrating courts.

#ryandorsey is probably also gay? @NayaRivera It appears he love bombed her sister to smear mamma-rather than service family graciously as bereaved x! @NayaRivera_Team @RiveraArchive @riverahourly

[aliesnugglebunny]

I have anxiety, an anxiety disorder (trichotillomania), depression, ptsd, and ocd.

This year it took me a lot of courage to separate from a toxic relationship that worsened those conditions at time. It left me dealing with feeling inadequate, unlovable, a burden, a mess up, unworthy.

Fast forward to now. I've worked hard to be 3 months pull free. I live on my own. I work. I see a therapist every week. I have a boyfriend. He left for the airforce in June after us only beginning to be together leaving us at a very weird spot and plenty of distance in between.

This is a very important time for him. He's putting his all into his work and is maximizing every opportunity he can. He's so smart and so hard working. He only gets sometime to talk to me. I find myself getting jealous of little stupid things like liking other people's stuff on fb or not responding to my snaps right away but posting to his story. I know it's my disorders telling me he's choosing other people over me or that I'm not as important to him as I think or I'm annoying him and he no longer likes me. I know it's untrue. I know he's just busy. But it's hard to fight back what your brain has been programmed to think for years.

He hasn't spoken to me in two days, teetering on 3. He's open some snaps and all but it's been silence. My mind has been racing and my scared of him hating me instinct kicked in and I bombarded him with random ass snaps of my day. I shared a million and one vague memes and statuses on fb related. I went out and got drunk last night to try to numb my brain from thinking of the damage I've done.

I tend to cling tightly when the ship seems to be going down. I cling hard, so hard I suffocate people and self sabbotage myself and people leave or rather I push them away with my behavior.

That's all I can think of. The behaviors I tried so hard to get rid of came out. I ended up sending him a video stating that I'm having bad anxiety and why. And I left it at that. He hasn't seen it yet. I refrained from posting anymore for now on fb, insta or snap besides that selfie.

I didn't mean to be annoying or overbearing. I just got scared. I've never had any one be true to me. I never had a healthy relationship not to mention a now long distance one. I'm so mad at myself. I don't want to scare him away. He made me feel so special for the first time in I don't know how long. He made me feel safe. He made me feel understood.

All I can do is sit in silence and wait and hope he still understands that I'm still learning how to function without these insecurities and thoughts in my head. I'm still trying to shed my torn and weathered armour and defenses I had to use for such a long time. I'm sorry.

[susankayereid]

All of us are suffering because of my mothers corrupt personality and jealous behavior with secret society killers!! Victor be knows she's been conspiring with several no jealous evil killers to try to sabbotage my life. My brother knows she's jealous of me from talking to her often.

[cowsinbathrooms]

How the hell do you discuss money in a partnership?

The last 24 hours have been about discussing difficult topics with Marek. It’s been quite awesome and reassuring.

We’ve discussed money. This is probably the hardest one for me. But it excites me at the same time.

I guess money is like snakes for me. I’m shit scared of them when I see them in nature. But when I go to the zoo I never skip visiting the snakes. Cause I can see something I’m shit scared of from a safe distance. Closed in a terrarium.

And it feels safe to discuss money with Marek.

So I think now it will be a lot about finding balance between expressing the uncomfortable feelings without sabbotaging the partner for trying to be helpful.

-Ili

[desertdaddypsp]

The Sun Truly Did Come Out!

Last Thursday, I wrote that after my session with Carol I sat sobbing in my car. I was bemoaning the fact that I only had one or two friends and they always seemed busy. I kept thinking how I had sabbotaged beginning friendships (coffee dates, etc...) with an aura of being needy or angry. Well, something of a miracle happened during my sob-fest.

The phone rang and it was a guy that I have known for less than a year. His name is Ron, a retired Lutheran minister and a good guy. We have been out several times just as friends. Well, he invited me to The Purple Room to hear Keisha D. that night. I thought to myself, "This is LOVE showing itself!" I'm not a believer in god, but I do believe in the power of love and this was love showing me that someone cared enough to really seek me out. At first, I thought about saying no but then I thought, "After this miraculous turn of events, how can you even begin to think of saying no!?" I told Ron that I would meet him. We had a wonderful time. After the evening, he asked if I would like to go with him to Las Cazuelas to listen to some music during brunch. Again, I eagerly agreed but this time there was somethind different.

Being aware that I have been told by others that I can come across as needy and negative, I made a vow to myself that I was going to fight the urge to say anything negative the whole time I was with Ron. Oh, My GOSH! I must really be negative because it was SO VERY HARD not to dwell on negative things! Politics. Aspects of my job that I find annoying. The dreariness of the church service that Ron attended. The difficulties of trying to work out a relationship with someone I love who lives in Pakistan. My conversation kept trying to say negative things. Oh!!! It was SO hard for me! That means that it must be true. I countered each negative thought with a positive comment or I said nothing. It was difficult, but I think it just means that I need to keep trying.

Maybe in this way my inner child will begin to feel more and more loved and, therefore, more and more loving and will put out a more positive aura. As Arif says, "Insah Allah!"

[tren-fraszka]

Fandom F5k 2020

Dear creator,

Thank you for taking your time to check my requests. I know my requests can sound a bit tricky, but please don’t be discouraged. I wish you will have good time writing first and foremost!

My AO3 is Tren, if you wish to check it out.

Likes: comedy, casefics, canon compliants, AUs, time loops, bodyswaps, roleswaps, “being hoisted by your own petard” plotlines, snark, pettiness, rivals, enemies to friends to lovers, violence, friendships and character bonding,

DNW: explicit sex, A/B/O, mpreg, rape depicted as positive (so no “it’s okay, because the other person enjoyed it/it was what they truly wanted”), trans headcanons, soulmate AUs, stories ending with surrender to fate/destiny, fourth wall breaking in canons where that doesn’t occur, character has cancer or other real-life terminal disease AU, word “queerplatonic”.

Also, I included what ships I’m okay with in each fandom. Please do not include any ships that aren’t canon and I have not allowed in those sections (if you feel really strongly about a ship I haven’t mentioned, you can always ask through mods just in case).

Additionally, while I almost never request fanart as possible medium, because I prefer my main gift to be fic, I would be very okay with receiving fanart treats. On another note, feel free to use my old letters if you get your hands on them. I never stop being interested in fandoms, and if I requested something once I will still want it in the future.

                                              REQUESTS

MARIMASHITA! IRUMA-KUN

I read new manga chapters as they get translated so feel free to incorporate anything from the manga that’s available in english. I’m not spoiled for anything beyond that, so please no spoilers for future developments.

Kiriwo Amy/Suzuki Iruma

 There are many good ships with Iruma, but this one just has a lot things I like.  I love enemy ships with both sides being way too emotionally invested into each other so this was inevitable. I love how this relationship starts as this really wholesome friendship and school festival preparation, except Kiriwo turns out to be a bit messed up and wants to blow up everyone. But then they both accept the outcome and go on with their lives still thinking about each other. Iruma goes through a lot of trouble to keep the club operating even though Kiriwo has been pretty much expelled. And then Kiriwo is now obsessed with Iruma as his anthitesis and perfect enemy.

I’m okay with the potential story happening at any point in the canon. I would love both a story set before the festival while Kiriwo is still hiding his true colors or a story set after festival. Maybe Iruma runs into Kiriwo somewhere after he escapes prison and instead of calling an adult, he tries to stop Kiriwo from causing trouble on his own. As for pre-festival story. Maybe some upperclassmen steal important parts from the club and Iruma and Kiriwo set out to get them back.

Naberius Kalego & Suzuki Iruma

I love Kalego for being a much better take on Snape than original Snape ever was. The second the series made Kalego Iruma’s familiar I knew this was about to get good. And it was. I love how Kalego slowly warms up to Iruma, even if he is still allergic to his and Sullivan’s antics. I love that Kalego is actually a competent teacher who cares about his students, even if he would rather eat a whole lemon than admit it out loud.

For prompts, maybe Sullivan ends up having an important business and Opera isn’t available so he dumps looking after Iruma on Kalego for a few days. Or Iruma is struggling with studying since so much is new for him so Kalego ends up forced to help him catch up with the material (if you are following manga inclusion of Balam is always welcome). Or maybe Iruma gets into usual trouble ends up stranded somewhere and the only one he can call for help is his familiar.

AUs and ships

I love the worldbuilding around the demon world, so I would ask that if you decided to write an AU that it still incorporates demons. I would definitely love an AU where rather than getting summoned to demon world, Iruma accidentally summons either Kiriwo or Kalego into the human world. Maybe Iruma’s parents try to use him as an offering, but instead he ends up bound to a demon. I would love to see Kiriwo excited to unleash suffering (even if his weak powers severely limit him in that regard) onto human world just to discover that he made contract with the biggest pacifist possible. Or Kalego being torn between wanting to return home as soon as possible (he has classes to teach!) and wanting to somehow help the weird human child that just keeps getting into trouble. Any other demon-focused AU is also welcome. I’m also fine with any sort of AU divergences scenario. Maybe Iruma keeps accidentally sabbotaging Kiriwo’s terrorist plans without realizing it. Or Iruma ends up summoning Kalego more often as his familiar when he gets into trouble.

As for ships, I’d rather avoid any love triangle scenarios for this canon, so please focus on just one pairing per character (competing for Iruma’s attention is normal for this canon, I’d just rather not see outright romantic competition). It’s self-explainatory for Kiriwo request, but if you want to include some shipping elements into the Kalego request I also ship Iruma/Ameri, Iruma/Alice and Kalego/Balam.

BOKU NO HERO ACADEMIA

I read new manga chapters as they come out so feel free to incorporate any new developments.

Bakugou Katsuki & Uraraka Ochako

Bakugou Katsuki/Uraraka Ochako

I love how different the two of them, but at the same time how well they see through each other. I would love to have them work together while showing both great teamwork, but at the same time butting heads over their differences in worldview. I also love how they both acknowledge each other’s strength.

If you plan to write the ship version of this prompt: they are both very focused on becoming heroes, so I would prefer that they don’t just get together easily. I believe they would be both be extremely reluctant to do so, because of their line of work and media attention that heroes get. Still, I would love to see the tension between them where their professionalism fights against their feelings.

For prompts I would love having them complete some sort of exercise or exam together. I would love to see them pretend to be villains for the sake of exercise and Ochako surprisingly getting into the role, with occassional moments of her breaking out of it, which give everyone a whiplash. I feel like Bakugo would have amusing reactions to seeing her act so out of character. Or the work together on something for school festival. Like making a perferomance togater. Alternatively you can go for future fic where the two of them take part in an action to stop villains. Maybe one of them gets hurt which prompts the other to get very protective (and more honest about their romantic feelings if that’s what you are going for).

AUs and ships

I would very much encourage any future fics. I love seeing characters as fully-fledged heroes. I’m okay with other setting changes, though I would prefer for the competence aspect to still come in play somehow in them (with Bakugo being stupidly talented and hard working, while acknowledging Ochako’s potential). I’m also okay with canon divergences.

I don’t mind past Midoriya/Ochako if you want to incorporate it into the story, but I’d rather not get any love triangles for this pairing. Either have Ochako’s feelings sizzle out or have them date and break up at some point in the past. If you are writing gen version I’d rather neither Bakugou nor Ochako were being mentioned currently having feelings for anyone. When it comes to other pairings I like Midoriya/Todoroki, Mirio/Tamaki and Eraserhead/Mic.

MY NEXT LIFE AS A VILLAINESS (MANGA)

I only read manga for this story, so please don’t spoil me for the parts not yet adapted from Light Novel.

Group: Katarina Claes/Gerald Stuart (My Next Life as a Villainess)

I ran into this manga on accident, but I definitely don’t regret it. I love how Katarina ends up solving all the problems in this series either through her efforts or by sheer accident and how she ends up becoming the actual protagonist. This charmingly comedic story has a lot of heart and I crave more.

I think I like Gerard the most out of all potential suitors for Katarina’s heart and would love to see more of his crush on Katarina and unsuccessful attempts at actually wooing her. We only see him through Katarina’s perspective, who can’t separate him from the Gerard she knows from the game, even though he changed under her influence. I would definitely be up for a story where Katarina starts to notice that maybe her idea of Gerard doesn’t exactly line up with the reality. Or maybe she remains blessfully ignorant and decides to go in-depth investigation into finding more of Gerard’s weaknesses, because she saw him do something nice for Maria and now she is sure the end is near for her and she wants to be extra prepared. Or maybe he takes her on a vacation trip to escape from her other suitors, but everything goes terribly wrong (maybe their carriage crashes forcing them to spend the night in the woods), and yet both of them end up having a lot of fun.

I don’t mind including any other characters, since they are a colorful bunch. I read this manga for harem shenanigans, and you are free to include as much of it as you want.

AUs and ships

I’m okay with AUs and canon divergences. The story is already a huge canon divergence after all, so if you want to twist it even more, that’s fine by me. If you want to play around with characters accidentally getting transported to the alternate world where Katarina is the original Katarina or getting a glimps of it, I would be very much for it.

I’m okay with all canonical crushes being acknowledged, however due the nature of my request I want the endgame ship to be Katarina/Gerard. I don’t mind other characters being shipped with each other.

SWORD ART ONLINE

I haven’t read Alicization novels, just watched anime. I know anime skipped some content and if you want to use it in the story I’m fine with it, just make sure to establish the situation so I know what’s going on. However, I would be grateful for not spoiling the story from the novels that have yet to be adapted (you are free to use general worldbuilding from it, just don’t spoil major plot elements).

Eugeo/Kirito

I was perfectly fine with Asuna/Kirito becoming canon and then Eugeo came and made everything gay. Honestly, though, I love the interactions Eugeo and Kirito had and I would love to see more. Especially from their sword academy days where they had some peaceful time before they were brought to the tower. I want to know all the weird shenanigans they got into during that time, given how much like they acted like an old married couple. Or if you want something else then maybe some exploration of their struggles as they climb the tower. For example, a time loop taking place during their tower climb, with the system returning to the last save state each time Kirito dies to keep him alive.

AUs and ships

I don’t have any suggestions, but I don’t mind setting changes if that’s where you want to go. I’m also okay with Canon Divergence AUs of any kind. Especially, for ones changing the ending of first season. Like, I’m okay with sad gay we got, but there are so many possibilites to explore here other than what canon gave us. Maybe have Eugeo permanently fuse with his blade so Kirito ends up having a sentient sword boyfriend. Or he asks Cardinal to transfer her authority to him and have him oppose Administator as the new Cardinal. There’s just so many interesting ways this could have gone. I’m not big on the War of the Underworld plotline so you are free to handwave how the changes impacted it or modify that part of the story completely.

As I mentioned I’m okay with Asuna/Kirito ship, so if you want you can incorporate it in the story. Just make sure the focus stays on Eugeo/Kirito. I must also admit that I really can’t see Eugeo’s feelings for Alice as romantic, so I would prefer them to not be portrayed as such.