#and today i woke up with a stupid infected eye

[bobendsneyder64]

I fucking feel like a walking virus

[seangelfish]

Our favourite items

Ritsu Sakuma x Reader ♡ Tags: Fluff, established relationship, casual romance, really wholesome, INTRO IS REALLY LONG, SORRY!, she/her pronouns ♡ Word count: 2,215 ♡ Synopsis: Inspired by the Meowsketeers scout story in which this card is featured in. I've been trying to read the scout stories since I never read them, and I thought that this one would be cute to add the reader in! Please note that this fic does not stay true to the story, but it has taken bits from it. A/N: There needs to be more Ritsu x reader fics.

Drenched in sweat, Ritsu slowly woke up from his nap in the ES gardens. His mind was still filled with thoughts of what happened the other day when Tsukasa confronted and withdrew some of the new members of Knights.

Ritsu pitied them, but what was said was the mere truth. That's the way Knights operated, it was never a unit to have fun with as an idol. But seeing those tearful faces did take a toll on him.

At that moment, Ritsu felt something heavy weighing on him. It wasn't what happened that day, but something physical that he could feel near his stomach.

'Who is it? Am I being attacked? It's not those pranks Tsukipi set up, right?' he thought tiredly. Unless it's (Y/N)...? No... she said she'd be busy today–

Ritsu was getting annoyed. "Hold on. You don't disturb people when they're sleeping!" he groaned. "Now I'm in a bad mood... Don't mess with me– Huh?"

Eyes wide open, Ritsu found that on his stomach was a black cat.

"Ugh, so it was this guy!" he fumed. "Get off! You're heavy and it's too hot...!"

Yet the cat wouldn't budge. It stayed lying on Ritsu's stomach as if he were a pillow. Ritsu wasn't having any of it though, no one dares disturb his sleep even if they were a cat! Getting angrier by the second, he decided to fight it off him.

"Hey! Ow! Don't dig your claws in me!"

"That Suo, he's late!" exclaimed Leo. "What a troublesome guy! I came early today since he gets angry at me when I come late."

"Unbelievable! He's wasting my precious time!" Izumi chided. "This is so annoying. Did your wanderlust infect Kasa-kun?"

Leo laughed. "Eh? What, what? Wahaha, that's funny, Sena! I suppose it's fate that Knights' leader is to be cursed by wanderlust!"

Frantic footsteps could be heard as Tsukasa barged into the studio panting. He apologised, mentioning to his seniors that he got involved in a little incident with Ritsu. That was when Ritsu entered the room, still arguing with the black cat he encountered outside.

"I told you to let go of me, didn't I?! Why can't you understand me, you stupid cat?!" Ritsu growled. "Do my clothes smell like catnip or something...?"

"A stray cat got attached to Ritsu-senpai and it won't let go of him," stated Tsukasa.

"Unbelievable. This was why you were late?" said Izumi. "There's got to be some way to pull it off. Just grab it by the neck like how a parent cat carries a kitchen– Owah! This guy tried to scratch me! If you were human, I'd have you pay compensation!"

Arashi suggested that they all calm down and get started on the retrospective – the reason why they were holding a meeting in the first place. If they ignore the cat, perhaps it would let Ritsu go!

But as Arashi started playing the video of their live, Leo noticed something. In the video, Leo pointed out the front row seats where beside a fan's feet, a black cat was seen.

"This guy, it saw Ritsu at Knights' live and came to meet him!" said Leo excitedly.

"Hah...? No way! That sounds so unrealistic," Ritsu replied before turning to the cat which started showing him affection. "Owah, what? Don't start licking my cheek!"

"Given its reaction, it probably did come to meet Knights," said Tsukasa. "Isn't it just the cutest? It probably fell in love with Ritsu-senpai's brave figure at the live!"

"What?! Don't say things so nonchalantly!"

But the other members of Knights had agreed to let the cat do what it wanted despite Ritsu's comments on how much of a disaster this was.

The cat didn't let go of him even during the retrospective. It lay sound asleep on Ritsu's lap. Knights had come up with a name for the cat too, 'd'Artagnyan', their 'newest knight that was drawn in by Knights.'

Ritsu didn't like this idea at all. He didn't see any resemblance between him and the cat that his fellow members were constantly pointing out too. Though, he didn't want to just kick it out. He wanted it to leave on its own volition.

"It clings to you like how you cling onto (Y/N)," stated Arashi causing Ritsu to erupt into a steam of embarrassment. "Maybe it finds your scent comforting~? If so, it might be satisfied with something that has Ritsu-chan's scent on it..."

"Something with my scent?" Ritsu repeated. "Ah, I just came to an unpleasant conclusion..."

He was talking about his favourite blanket – the only thing in this studio that had his scent on it. But there was no way that Ritsu wanted to give this unlucky cat his favourite blanket!

"Ah, wait! Don't suddenly pounce for my blanket, you idiot cat!" huffed Ritsu as he tried to yank the blanket away. He was now on the floor fighting with the cat. "Give it back! I don't want such an unlucky cat to use my blanket! Guys, please help me out here!"

"Oi, oi. There's no need to get so worked up over something like this, right, Ritsu?" said Leo. "I know it's annoying, but it'll be dangerous if you get violent in here, no?"

"But I really like this blanket! I won't allow it to use it! Ah, don't scratch it–"

"Please calm down, Ritsu-senpai...!" sputtered Tsukasa.

But before Izumi could assert himself to scold Ritsu, you had rushed into the studio. Arashi had texted you about the situation before they started their retrospective, hoping that you'd come to solve the issue at hand. After all, you solved a lot of their problems before, it became customary to ask you for help.

"Ritsu, are you okay?" you asked worriedly, bending down. "Hey, what's wrong? You're not usually like this."

"(Y-Y/N)?!" Ritsu blurted, perplexed at your sudden appearance. "W-What are you doing here?"

You answered that even though you were busy with your own assignments today, you couldn't just ignore what was happening with Knights, with him.

"Is this what's bothering you?" You tried picking up the cat, but it immediately started hissing at you. "Ah! Okay, I'm not going to pick you up then...! Anyway, Arashi texted me all the details already. Why don't you just give up the blanket, Ritsu?"

"N-No!" he cried. "I can't!"

"I don't understand why you like that blanket so much," said Izumi. "I'll buy you a new one if that makes you happy–"

"That's not it! (Y/N) bought me this one!"

Everyone had gone silent over that fact.

"Then I'll buy you a new one," you offered.

"No!" Ritsu protested. "You got this for me when we were first years! I can't just let that go!"

Ritsu usually wasn't this worked up, so you knew he was upset about something other than his blanket. But you also knew that he was a very sentimental person too, so you couldn't just force him to give up something that he truly loved. It was sweet that he had kept this blanket up until now though. It showed how much he loved you.

"I have an idea," you suddenly said. You rummaged through your bag and pulled out a white sweater. "This also has Ritsu's scent on it."

"Wait," Ritsu began. "That's my sweater."

"Mhm, my favourite one too!" you giggled. "If we give the cat this, then it'll give up on the blanket!"

"B-But (Y/N), you love that sweater...!" he said.

"I do, but you love that blanket too, right? I'll give this up so you can have your blanket back!"

With how selfless and thoughtful you were being, Ritsu had finally cooled down.

"N-No, it's fine," he said sadly. "I'll let it keep the blanket, you keep the sweater, okay? I'm sorry, everyone, I went overboard. I didn't mean to hurt anyone."

"Ritsu..."

He picked up his blanket with the cat still attached to it and left the building quietly. The meeting with Knights had come to an end. You sighed, apologised and thanked Knights for putting up with your boyfriend before following after him.

Ritsu was situated on one of the tables at the ES gardens, his head laid on his arms as he watched the black cat sleep in his blanket.

"It's my fault that Knights ended up fighting again... If only this cat hadn't been there. No, I should've been calmer..." he murmured. "It would've been better if I had analysed the situation calmly like I usually do, and brought it to a positive conclusion..."

"Ritsu~" you called out.

With the sound of your voice, his eyes immediately gravitated towards you. He didn't lift his head though, he was too tired for that.

"(Y/N)..."

"Here," you said, pressing a cold can of soda to his cheek. He cried at the coldness but quickly covered his mouth from being too loud. He didn't want to wake up the cat despite how annoying it was today.

"Ah, thank you..." he said, taking the can from you. He laid it in front of him, not opening it. "(Y/N), I'm really sorry about earlier. You were busy, and Nacchan had to call you over to deal with something so small."

"Eh, it's okay~," you said. From behind, you wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him close to you. "I'm nearly finished with my assignments anyway. But Ritsu, are you really okay?"

Ritsu strained a smile, but he held your arm in a way to comfort himself. "I'm fine now. I'm going to sit here and reflect on my actions until this stupid cat wakes up. If I ignored the cat in the studio and it gets restless, it might be even more troublesome."

You laughed. "It's so cute when it's sleeping. It reminds me of you."

"Eeehhh? Why does everyone keep saying that?" he asked.

"Well, it's cute and you're cute! Also, it takes naps just like you, hehe~"

Ritsu sighed but laughed along. "Ah, you're wearing the sweater," he said, finally noticing the baggy look on you.

"Yep! I'm glad I didn't need to give it up in the end, but I do feel sad that you had to give your favourite blanket away," you said.

"It's fine. Maybe it'll let it go later..." he started. "Well, I hope it does anyway. I really do like that blanket..."

He chuckled, reminiscing the time you first got him the blanket. The two of you met just before entering Yumenosaki. You were Mao's friend initially, but he had introduced you to Ritsu during the time he had to repeat his first year. Ritsu had treated you coldly at first, but when you spotted him sleeping in the gardens, coming to know of his illness, you had decided to gift him a blanket for him to use.

It was a blanket you had bought at a shop in town, nothing special, but Ritsu thought the world of it. Even when he treated you so poorly, you were still so nice to him – to accommodate him in this way. He grew fond of the blanket, but he mostly grew fond of you.

After that day, he stuck to you just like the cat he was watching now.

"You know, I'm surprised it's still kept in good condition after all these years," you pointed out. "We're in our third year now... and it still looks brand new."

"I take good care of my things, (Y/N)~," he said. "And I'll be keeping that blanket for as long as I can."

You smiled and gave him a peck on the back of his head. "Anyway, aren't you going to tell me what got you so riled up? It can't just be because of the cat, right?"

"Ah, right..." he said. He opened the can that you gave him and began to drink the contents of it. "So, this is what happened..."

He explained everything to you, recalling what happened that day when they had to withdraw some of the new Knights members. He was honest with his feelings, how bad he felt when he saw those tearful faces, how bad he felt when he knew that those dreams were being crushed.

But after some reassurance from you, Ritsu felt a lot better. That's when Tsukasa showed up to check up on him too. A suggestion of finding foster parents for the cat was brought up which Ritsu agreed to.

By time, he grew fond of the cat albeit he still wanted it gone. But things had resolved themselves, and Ritsu was back to his calm, analytical self again.

You had come to say goodbye to the cat, d'Artagnyan, too. This time, it had let you hold it.

"Hehe, it really does remind me of you," you told Ritsu who immediately turned red. "Don't miss Ritsu too much, you hear me~? I hope you live a comfortable life."

Watching you be so gentle with the cat like that had Ritsu feeling some sort of way. He smiled gently to himself, appreciating that you were there with him, that you were there to console him and to listen to every word he had to say. There was nothing better in this world – even his favourite blanket – that would compare to you.

Intro page | Ensemble Stars masterlist | Rules

[darnell-la]

Alriiight, then I'd like to provide another idea 🤗 Something cheesy like the episode where Murphy forces Bellamy to hang himself but you are Bell's girlfriend and help Raven underneath the drop ship to find a way inside. Then Murphy shoots you after you get inside and Bellamy is safe but he then holds you in his arms and tells you how stupid you were to do this but that he loves you. You survive but need rest and Bellamy is the one caring for you and it's all fluffy then ? ❤️

note: I might be in love with Bellamy Blake.

———

“How about we wait right here until your pretty little girlfriend comes in,” Murphy smirked before he gagged Bellamy so he couldn’t warn y/n that Murphy was in here and waiting for her.

“Babe? Bellamy, where are you?” Y/n whispered, thinking Murphy had went to the top of the drop ship to hide. “Oh god,” y/n said as she crawled from under the ship to see her body friend on a chair with a seatbelt rapper around his neck.

“Wait- I’ll be right there,” y/n said as she struggled to get from under the ship. Bellamy yells were muffled as he tried to warn y/n where Murphy was and what he was capable of doing.

“Hey- Relax,” y/n said in her soft voice as she got up. As soon as she took a step, she was shot. The loud scream echoed through the forest, alarming the people outside what had happened.

“Y/n!” People yelled outside, panicking ans trying to get inside. “There ya go,” Murphy chuckled as he came out of a corner he was waiting in. “Been wanting to do that shit for so long,” he admitted.

Bellamy’s anger grew quickly as he yelled and tried his best to get out of the restraints, but there was no way he was getting free.

“Oh, shut it, Blake. You’re next,” Murphy said as he walked over to y/n who cried on the floor, bleeding heavily as he smirked down at her. “Pretty girls bleed too,”

Before anything else could be said, Murphy heard Monty yell that he could open the door. “Motherfucker,” Murphy said as he walked over to Bellamy and kicked the chair he was in.

“No!” Y/n cried out as she witnessed her boyfriend chocking to death. “I’ll see y’all soon,” Murphy said as he went upstairs to make some escape.

“Please, help- Help!” Y/n shouted as the door opened. As soon as they saw Bellamy, they ran to him. Clark quickly ran over to y/n to see her wound. The gun Murphy had wasn’t a regular gun. She was shit multiple times.

“I-It hurts,” y/n said in a crackly low voice as Bellamy got free. “No!” Bellamy shouted at Monty who said he needed to check him. “Baby- Are you okay? Will she be okay!?”

Bellamy freaked out after seeing the bullet holes in his girlfriend. “Needa get them out, and get her cleaned before they s and infect her,” as soon as he heard that, he picked y/n up and brought her out to the medical tent.

“I don’t want to see anymore hero shit coming from you after yesterday,” Bellamy spoke as y/n woke up. “Huh?” Y/n asked, confused and tired. She went to lean up, but groaned at the slight pain.

“Nah uh- Stop that. Lay down and rest. You ain’t working today,” Bellamy said as he came over to y/n and softly pushed her back down on her bed.

“What happened?” Y/n’s mind was blurry. “Murphy shot you. Yeah- The motherfucker shot you, and when I see him, I’m gonna kill him,” y/n blinked a few times as she rubbed her eyes, confused.

“Stop moving, y/n, this is serous,” Bellamy said as he placed her hands to the side. “You need rub your eyes? Ask me to do it. I don’t need you moving,”

Bellamy knew that was too much, but he didn’t care. He needed y/n to heal fast and well. He hated seeing her like this.

“Babe, relax,” y/n said, but Bellamy gripped her hands to stop her from moving. “I’m not fucking playing!” Bellamy yelled at her, making her stop any movement she had going on.

“I-I’m sorry, it’s just- That was so fucking stupid of you. Why would you do that? For me! You could’ve — Baby, you could’ve died,” Bellamy hated saying it as much as he hated thinking it.

“I’m sorry,” y/n said after a bit of silence. She could tell Bellamy was slightly traumatized from the vent. “No, don’t get like that on me. I’m sorry for yelling. I just- I really love you, and I thought I was going to lose you right before I died,”

Y/n instantly remember everything…

“Well, you didn’t, babe — C’mere and lay with me. You need to rest too. Can hear your voice giving out,” y/n giggled as she held out her arms. He quickly crawled over her and laid down.

“I gotta work soon-“ before he could finish, y/n cut him off. “Nah uh- If I have to rest, you do to,” Bellamy went to talk, she shushed him so he wouldn’t argue. “I’ll get lonely,” that was all Bellamy needed to hear to stay with her.

[underthenightskydreamsneverdie]

Carnal

Summary: Mattheo Riddle meets an unforgettable, mysterious Hufflepuff and spends the school year fighting his feelings.

Warnings: None, just so much sweetness and typical Mattheo behavior.

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle X f!OC

Word count: 1, 817

A/N: I'm so excited to post this story that I've been imagining for months. I really hope you guys like my OC, whose name shall not be revealed until the end. Oh, also for this series let’s pretend they start Hogwarts at 12 years old, making them both 15-16 in this chapter.

Divider Credit to @enchanthings

Check out my Mattheo and f!OC mood boards here!

From the day she stopped Mattheo and his Slytherin friends from picking on a first year, he should have hated her. He wanted to. He needed to. But he couldn’t. The way she had protected the young girl, stepped in front of their jinxes, shaken off the pain like it was nothing, and still not said a cruel word in return as she expertly blocked their spells, had sparked a curiosity about her that he had been fighting ever since. 

Maybe that’s just what Hufflepuffs do, he thought to himself as he snuck a peek at her across the great hall a few days later. No, his gut told him a different story, that’s just what she does. 

Life went on, as it always does, but for Mattheo it was different. His eyes searched every room for her, even as he scolded himself for hoping to find her. Why the hell do you care about this girl, she’s just a stupid muggleborn. Nothing special. His stomach clenched and he broke out in a cold sweat, body physically rejecting the thought. Alright, alright, I get it. 

He didn’t even know her name, had never bothered to remember it, but desperation to know her grew in him like an infection with only one cure. Before long he was ditching his friends to snag a seat near her in classes, waiting around in hallways to walk behind her, listening intently to every conversation for her name. His efforts were rewarded, at least partially, when professor McGonagall directed a question to a “Miss Waters”. His breath caught as her head whipped up and she hesitantly, but correctly, answered. 

Waters. Mattheo sighed softly as her back straightened with pride for a few seconds and she pushed her long ponytail over her shoulder. The pale blonde strands were like moonbeams against her black robe and it took everything in him to resist the urge to reach out to touch them. Oh for fucks sake. Get yourself together, Mattheo. You’ve got her last name, now let it go. 

He tried. He truly did. He spent the next few months forcing himself to ignore her, rolling his eyes every time her sweet voice filled the room, chastising himself whenever his thoughts drifted to her. And it worked. Well enough. Well enough that he could pretend he wasn’t dying to be near her. Well enough that he convinced himself dreaming about a classmate, a very pretty classmate, was a perfectly normal thing for a teenage boy. Well enough that he was no longer scouring his mind to come up with her first name. But the end of the school year was rapidly approaching and he knew if he didn’t discover her name, get to know even that tiny detail about her, she would haunt him all summer long. 

The last morning of the year Mattheo woke before dawn. Laying in the dark he contemplated his options, knowing it was now or never. I’ve only got a few hours left, he thought with a yawn, how am I going to get her alone today of all days? It’s always so chaotic, students running about saying goodbyes, the slow shuffle to the train - the train! That’s it, I’ll find her on the train. He clapped his hands together before he realized what he was doing, fighting back his chuckles as startled groans sounded around the room, the other boys unhappy they were so rudely awakened. He got out of bed, heading for the bathroom before one of the other boys could get there first, a small smile on his face. 

Having decided he should get to the train platform early so he wouldn’t miss her, Mattheo skipped breakfast, hanging around the Slytherin table saying goodbyes to the few other students he knew, bag over his shoulder, ready to leave this place behind. He searched the Hufflepuff table but didn’t see her. She must still be packing like all the other girls. Almost an hour before everyone else he left the castle. 

He ran, as fast as he could, to the train, collapsing as he reached the top step to the platform. His heart pounded in his ears, he was sure he was having a heart attack. Suddenly the very voice he was longing to hear rang through the air, a sweet “are you alright?”. Oh gods, I’m dying. He attempted to stand, leaning against the stone wall, groaning. I’m actually dying and to make it worse I’m hallucinating her voice. 

“I said, are you alright, Mattheo?” Her voice again, I really am losing it. A hand gripped his chin, gently lifting it upwards. His eyes followed slowly, his vision blurred with tears as he squinted into the sunlight. “Mattheo?” His eyes opened wide as he looked into clear blue eyes staring back at him. Oh gods, it really is her. He forced his head back down, his lips grazing her palm before she slipped her hand away. He needed a moment. His heart was pounding again, but for a different reason now. It was the first time he had ever seen her out of uniform and he was certain his mind was playing tricks on him. Was she really wearing- did I really just see that?

He lifted his head slowly this time, eyes drinking in every inch of her. Her black vans stood almost toe to toe with his dirty old converse. There were little white flowers on her shoes, what are those called again? I really should know this- The thought vanished in his mind as his eyes moved further up. Are those snakes on her tights?! Holy shit, they are! He groaned again, hoping she would assume the pained sound was related to his run. He tried not to shift around too much as his pants grew tight, body reacting to the sight of her. His eyes widened as they reached the hem of her pleated, red plaid mini skirt, the little chains hanging over her hips almost making him lose control. He had to bite back a growl as his eyes traveled over her torso, the little flashes of pale skin visible through her ripped shirt making his knees weak. He was hopeless to control the low, desire choked laugh that escaped him as he read the words printed on her chest. Witchy Woman. He would gladly drop to his knees and let her perform all kinds of magic over him, half convinced she already had. She wore more makeup than usual, her eyes seductively lined, gods those eyes, as she looked down at him. But her pale pink lips remained bare, begging to be kissed until they were raw and red, a wish his own body was demanding he make come true. Who knew this quiet Hufflepuff would turn out to be my punk princess. What a day.  

Rising to full height, ignoring the obvious bulge in his pants, he nodded, knowing full well nothing but rude remarks about her looks and ways to satisfy his desire would come from his mouth right now. He watched her turn back to the wall, only now noticing she didn’t have any bags with her. He was so confused by this he didn’t even try to get a peek under her skirt as she hoisted herself up. 

“How come you’re here so early?” He leaned against the wall next to her, looking up at her. “Why haven’t you got any bags?” 

“Haven’t got very far to go.” She shrugged, blonde hair falling around her shoulders as she looked down at him. 

He was unsatisfied with her answer, but let it go, turning his head to look down at Hogsmead. Nothing about this was going the way he had imagined, but he was determined to at least get one straight answer. “What’s your name?” 

She didn’t answer, instead looking up as though sensing something he hadn’t. Smiling, she turned and jumped off the backside of the wall.

“Hey!” Mattheo called after her, moving to the railing of the stairs he had just climbed to look for her. A soft “oh” left him as he came face to face with her. She smiled, spinning the stem of a small white flower between her fingers, a second one tucked behind her ear. Her hair threatened to overtake the delicate flower and without thinking he reached out, brushing the shell of her ear, tucking her soft hair back into place. Gods she’s beautiful. She reached for his hand, placing the flower on his palm. 

“Daisy.” 

He smiled down at the tiny flower, in awe of its delicate beauty. “Daisy.” How fitting. When he looked up she was gone, winding her way down the staircase, heading for the village. Mattheo ripped his eyes away from her as the brakes of the train squeaked to life just feet away from him, his hand instinctively closing around the fragile flower. He smiled as the red and black steam engine slowed. How had she known it was coming before I did? 

Dropping the small flower into the pocket of his shirt to keep safe, he turned back to catch a final glimpse of her. He spotted her climbing over the large boulders near the embankment of the river on the east side of the village, surprised when she threw her hand into the air and waved at him with excellent accuracy. Did she just guess I was watching her? Can she even see me from down there? Chuckling as she moved out of view, he boarded the train, leaning his head against the open window of a compartment. 

He pulled the flower out of his pocket, bringing it to his face. There’s something special about you, Daisy Waters. Gently, he dragged the flower across his lips, closing his eyes. Something very special indeed. 

His eyes still closed he sat back in his seat, one hand rifling through his bag for his journal, pausing suddenly. Over the noise of the train and the carriages beginning their journey towards the school, The wind carried a sound Mattheo never expected to hear. Is that a wolf? The heartbreaking sound of the howl pierced his heart, he knew a lonely creature when he heard one. Before he knew what he was doing he cupped his hands around his lips and howled back, one lone wolf to another. The wolf answered him, and for the second time that day, during the few brief moments as they howled together, Mattheo felt as though he belonged. 

He sat still for a long time, listening closely for the wolf to call again, but even when it didn’t, he smiled. The wolf was free and wild, something he longed to have in common, something he was determined to make true for himself one day. He pulled his journal out, tucked the little daisy between its pages, smiling as he thought about his Daisy. 

[winchesterwild78]

Montana part 2

Master List

Characters: Beau Arlen x Reader, Jenny Hoyt x Reader (cousins)

Warnings: mention of Domestic Violence, drinking, threats, assault, slow burn🔥

Minors DNI 18+

A/N: New series I’m working on. Doesn’t follow Big Sky story but has some characters.

This is a work of fiction. All work is my own, don’t take it.

I edited it quickly and typed with one hand due to surgery recovery. Please over look any errors. Thanks. 😊

🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀

The next morning you woke up early to the sound of Jenny in the kitchen. “Hey Y/N, did I wake you up? I’m sorry.” She smiled. “I’m not used to having anyone here. I’ll try to keep it down from now on. What time did Beau leave last night?” She asked. “Oh um he left about 1 in the morning.” You shifted uneasy. You wanted to tell her about the kiss but you didn’t know how she’d react. She noticed but didn’t say anything.

“Oh okay. Well I have to go in today. You’re welcome to come by if you want later or just relax here. Either is completely fine. Just let me know if you’re coming and I’ll make sure I’m at the station.” Jenny said as she grabbed her keys.

“Okay. Yeah I’ll probably just hang out here and look for a job. I’ll let you know if I’m heading out.” You said as you grabbed a coffee cup. She hugged you goodbye and left.

You stood in the kitchen drinking your coffee when your phone rang. You looked at the caller ID and it was David. You ignored it. He left a voicemail: “Why aren’t you answering my calls. I know you’re not really going through with this divorce. You’re just throwing a tantrum. Come home now and the punishment won’t be as bad.”

Your breath caught in your throat. You knew he didn’t know where Jenny lived but you were still afraid of him. You were afraid he’d find a way to figure it out. If you were being honest, you were afraid of him. When he got really angry the beatings lasted hours. He had almost killed you a few times.

The phone rang again and it was David, again. He left another voicemail: “Look I know you’re with Jenny you stupid bitch. When I find you I’ll take care of both of you. Don’t forget who you belong to Y/N. Just look at your thigh if you need reminding. You’re MINE!” He growled.

Tears pricked your eyes. A few years ago he thought a man at the grocery store was flirting with you. He punched the guy out and when he got you home he carved his name in your thigh. It got infected and when you went to the doctor he made you tell them you did it to yourself.

Tears were streaming down your face and when your phone rang a third time you jumped. It was Jenny. You tried to steady your voice and answered it. “Hello” you said shakily. “Hey, Y/N what’s wrong?! What happened?!” Her voice filled with concern. Beau was at his desk and heard Jenny. He stepped out and walked towards her.

“Okay just come to the station. We’ll figure it out. I promise you’re safe.” Jenny said. Beau approached her “is everything okay Hoyt?” He asked with concern. “No, Y/N’s ex is threatening her and his dumbass left voicemails with the threats.” She said. Beau’s eyes were wide. “Did he hit her, Jenny?” He asked. Jenny shook her head. “She’s ashamed of it. Apparently the bastard broke her nose and ribs before. I didn’t know he was abusive. I have to protect her Beau.” Jenny’s eyes filled with tears. Beau hugged her and assured “we’re going to keep her safe, I promise.”

A few minutes later you walked in. Jenny and Beau led you to his office and shut the door. You looked at Jenny with worry on your face. “It’s okay. He needs to know so he can help keep you safe.” She assured you. You swallowed hard and started at the beginning. How after you two got married it was little comments here and there about your weight, your clothes, if you did something wrong. Then one night he came home drunk from a work party and he smelled of perfume and had lipstick on his neck. He blamed you for his cheating and him losing his temper and hitting you.

You told them the beatings got worse. Beau and Jenny stood there in silence and you detailed story after story of his abuse. You sobbed as you were talking. Beau sat beside you and put his hand on yours. Jenny noticed and moved closer. He quickly pulled his hand back. When you played the voicemails Jenny and Beau’s eyes went wide at the mention of your thigh. After you played the voicemails silence filled the room.

Beau cleared his throat, he was fighting back tears. Jenny walked over and sat down beside you. “Honey, what is on your thigh?” She questioned softly. You looked at her and then Beau. You hung your head down. “He carved his name on my thigh. To mark me as his.” You whispered.

“Holy shit, Y/N. Did you contact the local police department when the abuse happened?” Beau questioned. “I did but it was no use. He had friends in the department and most of it I couldn’t prove.” You hung your head.

“Hoyt go get the forms for her to fill out. We’re going to get a restraining order and document the threats. You put the address of the station down as your mailing address. I’ll keep you safe Y/N. I promise” Beau said as he placed his hand on yours.

Jenny looked at Beau and at you. She saw the spark and was worried. She walked out to grab the forms leaving you and Beau alone.

You looked up at Beau and he smiled. “Thank you Beau. I appreciate you being so kind. I’m sorry I brought this drama to your town and now to you.” He lifted your chin and placed his hand on your cheek “Hey, this is not your fault. I will do whatever I can to keep you safe. I promise you that. He’s not going to hurt you again.”

You both leaned forward and your lips met in a soft kiss. Your heart beat wildly and your lips were on fire. Jenny walked back in with the forms and stopped in her tracks. The two of you pulled apart quickly.

She shot Beau a look and handed you the forms. “Y/N, can you take your phone to Pop so he can make a copy of the voicemails for evidence.” Jenny asked. “Um, yeah I can do that.” You stood and offered a soft smile to Beau who returned it.

Once out of the room Jenny turned towards Beau. “What the hell Beau! I told you to stay away from her and I catch you kissing her?!?” “Hey look I didn’t set out to kiss her it happened. I like her and we both wanted the kiss. Come on Jenny, you know I’d never hurt her. You know me better than that.” He defended himself.

“I think you should back off. She’s not in a good place and I don’t want you taking advantage of that or her” Jenny fired back.

“Damn Hoyt, you really don’t know me then. I’d never take advantage of anyone.” Beau said. “I want you to back off Arlen!” She raised her voice.

Pop heard them almost yelling and so did you. He told you he’d be back. He knocked on the door and they both yelled “What?!?” Pop poked his head in the door and said “Just wanted to let you two know you’re being loud and she can hear you.”

Jenny and Beau sighed loudly. “Fine, but Beau leave her be!” Jenny said as she walked out. Beau let out a frustrated sigh and ran his hand through his hair. Pop looked at him “Sorry Sheriff”. Beau nodded and Pop left closing the door.

You finished the forms and got up. You didn’t see Jenny but you saw Beau in his office. You knocked on the door and you heard him say come in from the other side. When he looked up and saw you he smiled. “Beau, I’m sorry I caused problems with you and Jenny. It wasn’t my intention” you said.

Beau stood up and came around the desk taking your hands. “Hey, it’s not your fault. I knew Jenny didn’t want me to pursue you but I can’t help it. That kiss last night and today was amazing. I know you have a lot going on and I’m willing to wait for you if that’s what you want.” He smiled. You threw your arms around him and hugged him. “Oh Beau, thank you! The kisses were amazing and I want to see where this might go, but I don’t want to drag you into this mess.” You told him.

“I’m in this mess, I’ll do whatever I can to keep you safe. I mean it. Maybe we can grab some food sometime. If you want I can cook for you at my place. We can just be friends right now if that’s what you are more comfortable with.”

“Yes! I’d love to let you cook for me. Maybe your place is a better idea for now. At least until Jenny gets more comfortable with the idea of us. When would you want to meet and what should I bring?” You questioned.

“How about tonight and you can bring dessert if you want.” He smiled. “Great! It’s a date, well if you want to call it that. I love Jenny, but I’m an adult. I can make decisions about who I see. If you’re interested in a relationship with me I’d be willing to give it a try.” You smiled a little uneasy. If you were being honest you were worried about his response.

“Yes! I’m willing to try. I’ll see you at my house tonight at 7. Here’s my number and address.” He wrote it down. As he handed it to you his fingers brushed against your hand and you shivered.

You placed a soft kiss on his lips “I’ll see you at 7, Beau.” You walked out of his office and over to Jenny. “Hey. Can we talk?” “Yeah sure, let’s go outside.” You touched her arm “Look Jenny, I know you’re only looking out for me but I’m a big girl and can take care of myself. Beau seems sweet. I’m not planning on jumping in bed with him, but I would like to see if we lead to something. We kissed last night. It wasn’t planned it just happened. I don’t want to cause problems between you two, but I have a right to be happy.” “Y/N you’re right. You deserve to be happy but I just don’t think you should be jumping into a relationship with anyone this soon. You just left your husband for fucks sake. I agree Beau is sweet, but he has a ton of baggage too. I don’t want to see either of you hurt. You can kiss whoever you want, but I just think you and Beau should cool it.”

You knew this was a losing battle and you didn’t want to cause tension between you two. You love Jenny and you need a place to stay so you decide to just keep the thing between you and Beau away from prying eyes. “I hear you Jenny. Thank you for looking out for me. I’m going to go explore today and see if I can find a job. I won’t be home for dinner. Love you Jenny Bean.” “Okay, be careful. Love you too Y/N/N.”

Jenny went back inside and you sent Beau a text.

You: Hey. Jenny is adamant about us not seeing each other. I tried to convince her but it was no use. If you don’t want to continue this I understand. I’d like to, but for now we need to play it smart.

Beau: I understand and I’d like to see where this goes if you’re willing to.

You: I am very interested. I’ll see you at your place tonight at 7.

Beau: Great! See you then, and Y/N I can’t wait to kiss you again.

You blushed and smiled climbing in your car. You drove into town and stopped at the coffee shop Jenny took you to. You went in and ordered a latte to go. The poor woman behind the counter looked frazzled. “Hey, you okay?” You questioned. “Um, oh yeah. My worker called out and we’re already short staffed so I’m here by myself with the cook. I’m working on taking orders, making coffee and being the hostess and waitress while he cooks. Sorry honey. I’m just a bit overwhelmed. I’ll have your coffee in a minute.” She hurried past you.

You walked over to her as she was cleaning a table. “Do y’all need any help? Like are y’all hiring?” “Yes we are. We’re in need of someone who can do it all. That’s hard to find though. Especially in a small town like this.” “Well for what it’s worth I was a waitress through college and I worked at a coffee shop. I’m actually looking for a job.” You told her.

“Really? When could you start? I could use help and we could do a trial basis if you’re okay with that. If we both think it’s a good fit the job is yours. By the way, I’m the owner Suzan.” she told you. “I could start right now, I’m Y/N, nice to meet you Ms Suzan” you said grabbing an apron. “Oh honey you’re an angel. Take this to that table while I grab the food for the other table.” She said handing you a tray.

You walked over and greeted the couple at the table handing them their order. “Holler if you need anything” you walked away. As the day wore on you started to feel more comfortable with the system, the menu and the customers. It was like riding a bike.

By the time the last customer was served you were exhausted and excited. “Well honey, looks like you survived. I hope you liked working here cause I’d like to offer you a job if you’ll take it.” “Oh yes! I’d love to work here. I can be back tomorrow morning early” you told her. “Great. See you at 5:30. We start early I hope that’s okay. Oh and here are your tips from the day.” She handed you a wad of cash. “Oh no, I couldn’t. I just wanted to help out today.”

“Nonsense, you worked today these are your tips and you’re going to be paid for today too.” She pushed the money in your pocket. “Well thank you. See you tomorrow.” You walked to your car.

Once inside you sent Beau a text.

You: I got a job today. Can’t wait to talk to you about it over dinner if we’re still on.

Beau: Absolutely! I’m just about finished cooking if you want to come over now. I can’t wait to hear all about it.

You smiled and told him you were on your way. As you backed out of the parking spot your tire popped. You put the car in park and got out to check it. It looked like it had been sliced. You went to the trunk to get the spare and noticed the back tire was slashed too. You looked around and swallowed hard. Who would do this. You thought.

Grabbing your phone you called Beau. “Hey, I was just thinking about you. Are you almost here” he asked. “Beau. Something’s wrong my tires were slashed. I don’t know who…the line went dead.

Beau panicked. He tried to call you back but your phone went to voicemail. He called Jenny “hey Arlen what’s up” she asked. “Jenny, Y/N called me and said her tires had been slashed. Then the phone went dead. I have no idea where she is. Do you know where she got a job today” panicked in his voice. “No. I didn’t know she got one. I’m heading to town. I’ll call Pop and have him out too. She’s a tough girl. I’m sure she’s fine” Jenny said as she hung up.

Beau thought to himself “I sure hope so.” About 10 minutes later Beau, Jenny and Pop were all searching Main Street for you. Beau was the first to see your car. It was dark but as he approached he saw the tires and your door opened. Then he froze. Lying on the ground was you. You weren’t moving and your phone still in your hand.

“Y/N!” He and Jenny both ran to your side and she grabbed you. Pop called an ambulance. You were groggy and winced in pain. Something had hit your head. “Oh my god Y/N. What happened” Jenny asked. “I don’t know. One minute I was talking to Beau and then wham. Something hit my head. I don’t know what happened.” You told her as tears pricked your eyes.

The paramedics came and checked you out. They said you were okay but had a concussion and needed to take it easy. Jenny wanted you to go to the hospital but you refused. She wanted to drive you home but you told her you needed to talk to Beau first. Jenny was irritated but she didn’t want to argue.

You walked over to Beau who was keeping his distance. “Beau. I’m so sorry I messed up our plans. You had cooked and I spent all day looking forward to it.” Tears fell from your eyes. He wrapped his arms around you and wiped the tears away. “Shhh it’s okay. This isn’t your fault. I can heat it up for lunch tomorrow. I’m just glad you’re safe. I was worried.” He kissed your forehead.

You smiled at him and looked over at Jenny who pretended not to be watching. You smiled. “Guess I better go. Maybe we can do dinner soon. I really was looking forward to it. I have to work tomorrow at 5:30 so I need some sleep.” You told him. “Oh so you’re working with Ms Suzan. She’s great. Maybe I’ll have to start getting my coffee out instead of at the station.” He chuckled. “Well I look forward to seeing you Sheriff.” You winked.

You hugged him and walked over to Jenny. Throwing an arm around her you said “come on. Let’s go home”. She nodded and everyone said good night.

Once home you crawled into bed after a hot shower. Before you fell asleep your phone went off.

Beau: I hope you sleep well tonight. I’ll see you in the morning. I’m driving you to work. No arguing.

You: Yes Sheriff. I will see you tomorrow morning. Good night. ☺️

Beau: Good night beautiful.

You smiled and put your phone on silent, then you laid down. Since your phone was on silent you didn’t see the text that came in.

Unknown: That was just a taste of what’s to come if you don’t drop this divorce. Don’t make me come back. David has given me permission to bring you back by any means necessary.

Tags: @nescaveckdaily @kr804573 @k-slla @jackles010378 @jawritter @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @roseblue373 @cheynovak @jassackles @chriszgirl92 @suckitands33 @arcannaa @n-o-p-e-never @ladysparkles78 @smoothdogsgirl @hobby27 @manicjk

[justanamesstuff]

Chapter 7

Seasons

Matty Healy x f!reader A/N: I can't believe we are soooooooo close to the end!! I hope you like the chapter and dont scream at me because Matty is being an absolute asshole lol LOVE YOU GUYSSS ♥ Warnings: ANGSTTTT, matty being a dick (again), breakup, typos. Word count: 4.8 K

MASTERLIST TAGLIST

< Chapter 6

One week later

Matty woke up one week later of the car ride with Y/n. The day had come sooner than he expected. Matty wished time during that week had passed slower than it did.  

After waking up, he had kept his sight fixed on the roof of his room, while his mind raced at 100 km/h. He didn’t want to start the day, he wanted to skip it completely. 

Why he had offered the woman of his dreams, the love of his stupid little life, his own house to present another man as her boyfriend…why? A few explanations infected his Matty’s mind. Lesson for the future: don’t offer anything when you’re drunk or high. 

At the same time regret was pumping inside his heart and brain, his mind was trying to settle a little because he had a main reason above every excuse: Matty loved Y/n with every part of his soul, and he wanted to make her wishes come true. Matty wanted her to be happy. So, if her wish was to present Tom to the rest of the group, who was he to deny that? 

Matty had no choice. It wasn’t like he could say ‘Oh, y/n…remember what I offered you, and we finished arranging like two days ago? Well, I’m not in the mood, or will be every in this mood for it. No, in a million years no. He had to put on his big boy pants and survived the day. Just for her.

Matty’s heart was swelling with the thought of Y/n choosing another man, thinking why on earth she didn’t love him back the way he did. He knew many things were wrong with him, the singer knew his sins and mistakes, but he craved her love no matter what. Matty expected Y/n to love him despite everything. Y/n was a kind soul that didn’t deserve an asshole like himself, even though he wanted her to be a little stupid and picked him.

In the same household, but in another part of the house, Adam was scared as well for the night ahead.

Since Matty told the rest of them what he offered Y/n, the guitarist was the least shocked. He knew Matty would do everything for the girl, as well as he knew the risks of the planned dinner. Adam was scared of Matty’s deep feelings, the selfish part of him that longed for her love. That part, he believed, was a beast that Matty thought he could tame perfectly when on the other hand Hann recalled many times of the opposite thing happening. 

Adam concerned lingered the entire week, from the car ride until the morning when he was making breakfast. He was really afraid of what Matty was capable of doing to fucked up the evening, even unintentionally. Hann wished to be wrong, but a felling deep inside his guts disagreed. 

“Mornin’.” Matty greeted his friend entering the kitchen.

“Hi.” Adam answered, analysing Matty’s mood. “How are you?”

“Dunno…fine, I guess?” he messed his curls running a hand in frustration.

Adam frowned, “You guess?” he asked, looking directly to his tea.

“Please, today is not the day.” Matty warned him, grabbing what he needed for his meal.

“Talking about that- “ Adam looked at Matty from the kitchen table.

“What about that?” Matty was trying really hard to avoid his gaze as much as possible.

“Ross is in charge of the food, George and Jaime already brought the drinks- “

“Amazing.” Matty replied with very little enthusiasm. “What I have to do?” he sat at the table, in front of Hann.

“Behave.” Adam stared directly at his best friend’s eyes.

Matty felt a pang on his chest. “I’m not a child.” he muttered. 

“That’s why I’m just telling you. It’s not an order, it’s an advice even.” Adam explained.

“Then stop wasting your saliva, I know what I have to do.“

“Do you? Really? You can’t fuck- “

“Hann,” Maty interrupted him. “I don’t need a fight right now or to be treated as a fuckin’ baby, alright?” Matty looked down, trying to calm down his nerves.

“Then let’s not fight.”

“Then stop telling this crap! I know what you know, what you think but…but I’m fine and I’m not- “

“You’re not what? I need to hear it from your mouth, Matty…because if you do- “

“Thanks for believing in me, mate.” Matty’s voice cut with sarcasm.

Adam sighed loud, “I just don’t want- “

“I’m not going to. For god’s sake! Please have some faith in me.” 

He wasn’t that stupid, Matty thought. He very well knew how he was supposed to behave. Why no one could believe him?

“Fine, but- “

“Shut the fuck up, Adam! I’m tired of this. Just shut up!” Matty said a little loud.

“Okay, but for the count I warned you.”

“Oh my god, you just can’t stop talking, can you?” Matty scoffed leaving the room.

Adam felt bad impersonating that kind of person, but he knew someone had to give Matty a little heads-up. 

*********************************

During the day the tension at the boy’s house increased minute by minute. Hann and Matty didn’t talk again, and the rest of the boys tried avoiding Matty like the plague. They knew that Matty was at the edge of exploding so better not push their luck. 

Y/n and Tom were meant to arrive at 7 p.m. A little before that, most of the guys finished arranging the house while Ross cooked the dinner for all of them. Meanwhile,  Matty continued securing himself inside his room, as he did the entire day. He was too into his head, preparing himself for the big event. He kept looking at his watch like his life depended on it. 

At 7:05 pm, while Matty was in fact looking at the object in his wrist, the doorbell rang loud. Y/n had a key, but as she always did, she would only use it if it were too necessary.

Matty could hear how probably George greeted the couple and invited them in, then he showed Tom the rooms before they arrived in the kitchen. Matty knew they were there because of the loud voice of the rest of the guys hugging Y/n and welcoming her partner. 

Like a child that hides inside their room from the visits, Matty was waiting for someone to call for him or something. He knew he was being a little too excessive, but he was going to avoid the rush of mixed feelings as long as he could. 

After noticing that no one was going to force him to do so and the fact that he didn’t want to worry Y/n mostly, with a loud –dramatic– sigh, he opened the door. At the same moment, Hann remembered his existence and shouted his name.

“Matty!”

“Shit mate, you didn’t have to scream. I’m here.” he came down.

“Whatever.” Hann turned around, not giving Matty too much attention to his childlike behaviour. 

The two friend arrived in the kitchen. Ross was talking about the food with Y/n and Tom, while George got drinks for everybody.

Y/n looked at the kitchen door at the exact moment Matty looked at her.

“Matty!” she exclaimed, sporting a big smile, moving from Tom’s side to hug him. In a twisted way, it pleased him.

“Hi, darlin’.” he hugged her back, hiding for a little his head on the crook of her neck. Breathing her sense that calmed his nerves like it always did.

“What were you doing that took you so long?” she teased him.

“He was probably looking at himself in the mirror.” George joked, making them broke apart and offering each a beer.

“Shut up, that’s you div.” Matty fought back.

“Well, come.” Y/n took his free hand and led him to where Tom was standing.

“Matty, Tom.” she signed from one to another, without letting go of his hand. “Tommy, Matty.” the frontman wasn’t sure if the nickname or if Y/n detaching her hand from his caused more pain to his heart. Y/n quickly returned to Tom’s side. 

“Hi, mate,” Tom said happily “I’ve heard a lot about you.” he approached Matty to greet him with bro’s salute Matty despise. The singer was a little stiff, but he tried not showing it. 

“Hi, Tom. Same.” he replied saying the last part directly to Y/n, who understood very well Matty’s message. Tom returned to round Y/N with one of his arms, and Matty awkwardly stood a pair of feet apart from them. “How are you doing?” he continued speaking to Tom.

“Good, good. I’ve never been better.” Tom said looking at Y/n.

Y/n looked up at his eyes, smiling, “Cheesy.” 

“Yeah, I can tell.” Matty wasn’t sure of what to say or do.

The rest of the boys witnessed the scene partially happy for Y/n but, at the same time, feeling bad for their friend. They could tell the hurting look Matty couldn’t hide even though Y/n didn’t notice or was avoiding.

“Shall we eat?” Hann tried to save his friend from the awkwardness.

Ross peaked up announcing, “Dinner is ready!”

“Let’s sit then.” George told everybody.

The moved around the big table sitting in this way: one long side Hann, Matty and George, meanwhile in front Y/n sat facing Matty having Tom to her left side and Ross to her right.  

The night continued smoothly after the sitting moment. Ross served a spectacular meal, and the conversation flowed.

Hann and George played being the parents of Y/n and asked Tom about his intentions, about what he did for a living and all that kind of stuff. Even George didn’t hesitate telling her boyfriend awkward and embarrassing stories about Y/n. She was happy about how they were reacting to Tom’s presence. All her worries flew out of the window once they finished eating the main course. Even Matty, who was a little too silent for Y/n liking, was happy for her. At least, Y/n thought that admiring his drunk smile.

Matty reached to his few acting skills since he walked down the hall from the stairs towards the kitchen. He couldn’t show Y/n or any of the boys that he was so angry. His mind kept telling Matty over and over again the same stuff, letting himself down. He was so sad about not being the man that placed his arms around Y/n, the one she constantly looked at smiling wide. He used to be though. Matty, according to himself, was witnessing how little by little he was losing his place beside her, and his replacement was sat in front of his eyes.

He was a little mad at the moment with the guys too. They were really happy about the new couple. They never did that when he tried to be with her at the very beginning. Matty was getting stupidly jealous of his friends accepting Y/n’s partner. 

The booze helped to fog his mind more and more. Matty knew that drinking too much could make things worse in his mind, he didn’t stop. He subconsciously wanted this to go wrong. He wanted to say the truth, the things that were not being said out loud even in the worst way possible. It was eating him alive.

Y/n noticed Matty was dealing with something, although she didn’t connect it with her being in a relationship. After what they talk, and the fact that he told her he brooked up with Nadia, she thought that was the main reason. 

At the other side of the table, someone that knew almost every detail of Matty’s sorrows, noticed something was way too off about Matty at the moment. Instead of ignoring him as at the start of the evening, noticing the subtle drunk state, Hann tried to warn Matty subtly.

“Matty.” he leaned to his friend’s side, trying to catch only his attention and warned him. “Stop, now.”

Matty’s eyes connected with his from another dimension. “What are you talking about?” his mouth turning to a side, making it hard listening the words he was muttering out.

“I told you this morning- “

“I fucking- I fuck” he stuttered. “I fuckin’ know what you said, okay? Let me be. I’m not doing anything just drinking.” Matty brought his glass up to finish his drink.

“That’s the exact problem.” Hann said through gritted teeth. He wanted to shout more at his immature best friend, but Y/n looked at him, and he didn’t want her to suspect anything. He gifted her a weak smile.

“When do you guys leave for the USA?” Y/n asked looking first at Hann and then at Matty. The frontman looked at her angelic face. 

Matty was going to answer when Hann quickly said, “In a week or so, we’re meeting with the producer a little after we arrive. ”

“It’s true that Greta is going to be in?” Tom tried to make conversation.  

“I can’t tell you, mate. It’s a secret.” Matty answer, getting Y/n’s attention

“You can’t keep a secret, Matty. Not from us, not from me and I want to know.” Y/n joked. For her, it was an innocent joke, for Matty it equalled a dagger direct to his heart. He could keep big secrets, like the one his heart held. 

“I perfectly can!” Matty smiled at her, drinking more directly from a bottle this time.“Speaking of secrets, you kept it…this one” the bottle flew from side to side in the air when Matty tried to point at Tom’s face. “For a pretty long time, innit?” Matty’s smile never fell, making Y/n nervous

“Whatcha mean?” Y/n asked, giggling awkwardly after looking at Hann puzzled.

“You and Tommy boy, Y/n! Don’t ya’ remember? I mean- You keep that to yourself, ha?” Matty laughed to a never spoken joke.

“Matty,” she started to say. The rest of the table trying to decipher if they had to interrupt or not. For the time being, they stayed silent watching them talk as if it were a game of tennis. 

“It’s okay, love. I know, I know. I’m only your stupid best friend…why would you rush to tell me? Oh!” he sat straight into the chair as if he got a revolutionary new idea. “But you did rush to tell, G…didn’t ya?” Matty pointed out, lifting one finger of his right hand. “You told my mother too.” two fingers up. “But- yeah, I’m insignificant.” the singer took another sip from the bottle almost falling. 

“You’re being rude.” she stated, furious with him. Even though, she was determinate to not let him win. Y/n was against letting Matty know he was succeeding on ruining the night.

“Am I? What do you think boys?” Matty looked at the rest.

“Matty, let’s get you in bed.” Hann almost ordered him.

“I’m fine, Hann. We are just talking… right, Y/n?” Matty looked directly at her again.

“Yes, of course. We already talked about this, and it’s a private conversation don’t you think, friend?” she spat, still in control, but her anger was palpable.

“We are more than friends, sweetheart. Best friends!!” Matty mocked her.

“I insist- “Hann tried to say.

“Shut up, Adam”

“Hann, let him.“ 

The tension was high. Apart from the three of them, the rest of the presents, remain in completely silent. They still didn’t want to interrupt the ‘friends talk’ afraid of getting in the middle of the shooting.

The boys weren’t surprised at all. Who was surprised by Matty being a complete asshole? They did agree - in silence - what he was doing was another level of stupidity. On the other hand, Tom was more than intrigued. He wondered about the reason behind the bickering since there was an element he didn’t know. 

Tom quickly took notice of Y/n’s discomfort. His first instinct wanted to do something for her, to be there for her, but at the same time, Tom wanted to respect Y/n’s decisions.

Matty wasn’t going to drop the fight quickly, “You still don’t answer, friend.” 

“I’m not going to talk about this with you in this state, Healy.”

“So…I’m not any more your friend then?” he inquired, pushing all her buttons while taking once more a sip from the almost empty bottle.

“I’ll not have this conversation when you’re acting like a fucking prick!” she stood up.

“Matty, give me that!” George took hold of the bottle, taking it away from the singer. 

The frontman felt he was running out of time, “I’m the prick? Why didn’t you tell me?! And this time tell me the true!“ Matty stood up as well wobbling a lot.

“I already told you, I told you I was sorry. I told you the- “

“Don’t fucking think you can lie to me again!” he said loudly.

Y/n was sick of his attitude, “Don’t you fucking dear to yell at me!” she shouted leaning forward on the table.

“I think it’s time to go, Y/n.” Tom advised, standing beside her.

“And you to bed.” Hann held him from behind. Matty was moving like crazy.

After a quick look at Matty’s state, Y/n started to walk to the kitchen’s door, Tom following close behind her. Although Matty wasn’t ready for the fight to end. “Now you’re running away from me again, aren’t you?” he scuffed. “Coward.” the singer accused her.  

Y/n stopped dead in her tracks, so tired of this dramatic situation. She balanced to say something to him or just walked away. The rest waited for her reaction.

Even though, Matty spoke before her, “What does he have that I don't, Y/n?” Matty’s voice full of pain. A pain that broke him from head to toe when Y/n started walking away without looking at him.

Tom said a quick goodbye and followed her out of the boy’s house. 

When they heard the sound of the front door close behind the couple, Matty was sat on the closest chair. Hann turned to look at Matty with a stern look.

“Thank goodness I’d told you not to make a scene!”

“I didn’t…” Matty brushed his hand through his hair, pulling his roots.

“You didn’t- Fuck you, Matty!” Adam shouted at him and left the kitchen.

“You fucked it up big time, mate.” George told him.

“I- “

“You better not say anything, Matty. Let’s get you in bed.” G said to his best friend without any particular emotion in his voice.

Matty was so gone and drunk that he couldn’t notice the extent of what he just did. He was more hurt about her leaving without answering the last question. 

Tom and Y/n got in the car without saying a single word to each other. Their minds were so far from one and another. Tom was still so intrigued by what happened that night, and what was the motto of all. On the opposite side, Y/n was battling with so many feelings. 

Once again, Matty managed to fuck up her mind, her life…not matter how hard she worked for not letting him win. Nothing more occupied her mind on the way home. Matty was everything she could think about. That time, Tom couldn’t hold her full attention.

Her mind was cursing Matty for being so stupid, so selfish. So fucking immature. As well as asking herself why the fuck did he do that? What was the meaning of his behaviour? Was he still angry? They had talked about it! It made no sense, but she was sure she hated him at that moment. 

And the question: “What does he have that I don't, Y/n?” 

That question troubled her way more than all the shouting and dramatics. Y/n couldn’t pint point why Matty asked her something like that.

Her head started to hurt so badly, she wanted to cry. At the same time, Y/n wanted to ask Matty so many questions and shout at him for a good while. 

Why he had to make her life a mess all over again? Why does she continue to let him do that? Did she lie to herself for a couple of months thinking that everything was fine? When deep down she knew they had to solve so many unspoken truths.

……………………………….

Once they entered Y/n’s flat, she was ready to cry and pour her feelings but with Tom there she didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t responsible for her and Matty’s crap, and he didn’t have to deal with it.

“Y/n?” he asked slowly.

“Yeah?” she tried to smile at him, but her facial muscles didn’t answer.

“Do you wanna talk?” he remained away from her. Tom couldn’t read her mood, he didn’t want to push her either. 

“About what?”

“What just happened? What was all that?” he inquired.

“It was nothing.” she lied.

“Y/n…” he warned him.

Y/n passed around avoiding his eyes. “I don’t-” her voiced cracked a little. “I don’t even know what just happened, Tom, okay? Little do I know what to tell you.”

“Why he was so angry at you?” he tried to know.

“What do I know? I’m not him.” she scuffed. Y/n knew she shouldn’t take it out with Tom, but her mind was full of anger.

“Yeah, yeah. Totally. But- I mean,” he scratched the back of his neck. “You didn’t tell them, him, about us?” Y/n tried to massage her temples, the migraine was loud.

“You too with that?” she complained.

“I’m just asking, love. I want to help…I- “

“I know, I’m sorry.” she sat on the couch, Tom copying her shortly after.

“It’s fine. I understand.”

“I didn’t want to tell him about us.” she admitted.

Tom couldn't hide his surprise, “Oh.” he stared at her side profile.

“I don’t entirely know why.” Tom remained silent. “But little did I know he was going to be so angry at me…and we talked about it, he said it was fine. I don’t understand why he…” she thought out loud. 

Tom continued asking, “Why did he say you run away from him?”

“I don’t know, Tom.” she answered on the verge of tears.

“You never told me how do you guys met.”

“Because I didn’t want to tell you about us.” she admitted.

“What do you mean?”

“My story with Matty is complicated, Tom.”

“Did you guys…?” the actor let the unspoken question linger. 

“No, we’ve never.”

“Okay.” Tom fidgeted with the end of his jumper.

“I met Matty three years ago” Y/n started. “He offered me to drink with him and the rest of the boys.” y/n looked forward, way too into the memory. Tom stared at her side. “Matty tried to make a move on me.” she looked down, she didn’t want to look at his expression.

“And did you…?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

“We continued being friends. But- “

“But-?” Tom asked her. The gears in his mind started to work faster with this new information. 

“But I used to have feelings for him…until not so little ago.” this time she looked at him.

“You what?” he exclaimed. She didn’t say anything. “Little ago…when?”

“After the quarantine.” she admitted.

“Oh, fuck.” he moved awkwardly on his place. “So while I was simping over you, you were like in…”

“No, no, don’t go there, Tom.” she took his hands on hers, panicking a little.

 “Then explain it to me, Y/n.” he turned to look at her.

“My feelings or not for him are way too far from what I feel for you, Tom.” she explained.

“Are they?” he immediately regretted the bitterness. 

“Yes! Hear me out, when we first meet I had feelings for him and during the quarantine maybe a little, but then I decided to move on…”

“And then you give me an opportunity?” he folded his arms, letting her hands fall on her lap.

“No! I mean, yeah- But- You’re getting it all wrong.”

“Am I? Because what I get here is that when you got tired of waiting for Matty you searched for a distraction, a replacement…and I, a massive idiot, was there waiting for you. So, then you used me and now we are here.” Tom stood painfully slow. 

“I never used you, Tom.” Y/n started to cry while begging him to believe her words.

“I think you fully did. “

“No, please.” she tried to approach him, but he moved far from her reach.

“Tom.“ she begged.

“I love you, Y/n.” he stated.

“I- “

“No, I don’t want to hear it. Just answer me this, are you in love with Matty? Do you still have feelings for him?” He asked, waiting for her reaction.

Y/n was not ready for him asking that. After the events of the night, y/n didn’t know where her heart and mind, where she stood. She needed a little time to think, so she stayed silent. Tom didn’t take it well.

“I get it.” he said defeated. 

“No, no- Wait!” she exclaimed.

“You don’t have to explain anything, Y/n. You already told me everything.”

“Tom, please. I love you, please!” she begged.

“But you love Matty more.” he stated. Tom’s heart was shattered in little pieces, he wanted to leave but at the same time tell her he’ll never put her through all that misery. He wanted to give her all his love without caring about her using him.

“I- No!”

“Please don’t, Y/n. I’m going to go now.” he started to say. “I think you require time to think. I don’t want to make this even worse.”

“Tom!” she didn’t know what to say to make him stayed.

“I love you, with all my heart.” he approached her this time, tugging her hair behind her ear. “But I can’t let you use my love when it is convenient for you. It hurts yourself and me too.” Tom was putting her in front of himself, even when she somehow told him she loved another man more.

“Please don’t leave me.” T/n took his hands, while he caressed her cheeks. The temptation to stay and calmed her was too irresistible for Tom, but he knew he had to.

“Maybe you need to be alone now, Y/n. You have to face your feelings.” he looked at her death in the eyes. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?” he kissed her on her forehead for a couple of seconds, and then he left her flat.

Y/n keep her eyes closed. She couldn’t bear just watch him leave her side. She only senses the lack of his warmth around her, and when she heard the click of the door she fell down to the floor.

Tom left her. She was lonely and hurt, her mind kept repeating that night all over again. How did she make the world stop? She wanted to get down. It was worse than a nightmare. 

As Tom said, Y/n was left alone after a good couple of months with her feelings. The plaster was ripped without care. She had to take care of it. 

Where to start? Who to blame? Could she blame anyone besides herself? 

Y/n was the one that feed her feelings for Matty during days, months, and years. She gave him the power to do with her whatever he wanted. Every time she returned to Matty -because in some way she had returned to his side again and again-, she got hurt, she got angry, or they fought. She always dealt with feelings that circle around him. And yeah, they talked about them, but the truth was never ever really told. The parched everything up until they fought again.

In the middle of all that, she hurt Tom. She hurt a man that truly loved her. He was right with that too, she didn’t love him as much as she loved Matty. Even after all what happened during that shitty night and before, she still loved him.

Matty was everything she ever wanted. Tom had been close, but he wasn’t Matty. Y/n had to face herself and deal with the truth that had been showned during that night. 

In only a few hours, Y/n presented her new partner, then fight with her best friend but the at the same time her love, all to end up breaking with the new partner who she used for her own porpoises while remaining angry at Matty.

Y/n had a lot to deal with, but the strength wasn’t there while she cried in the middle of her living room feeling so lonely and hurt. Feeling like she took steps back. Feeling like she lost too much.

Y/n didn’t know how to stand up, not only literally…metaphorically too. She knew she could have reached for George or someone, but she couldn’t move. Y/n felt like she didn’t deserve to be helped and that she had to deal with it all by herself. 

So she crawled as best as she could to her bed. Still crying she fell asleep thinking about Tom and Matty. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @sinarainbows @eaglestar31 @sugarkane1001 @brittluvs1975

Chapter 8 >

[jhscdood]

i woke up in a Bad Headspace today and imma use by blog to vent about it like it's livejournal circa 2004.

tw for discussion of medical stuff

- I hate xmas. I'm jewish but my dad is not and the pressure to have An Perfect Xmas every year and the disappointment every year just grosses me out now. Not even going to talk about american xtian hegemony but there's some of that in there too.

- Today i began to suspect that the awesome new migraine med that actually stops my weather-induced migraines might also be interfering with the efficiacy of my prediabetes meds. or maybe im wrong and im Just That Fucking Exhausted.

- Spouse spent all last week recovering from a severe medication allergy and hives on 70% of his body. and steroids Do Not Agree with him so it was just. a wild time. terrifying af. stood over him with an EpiPen basically the entire time.

- 3 days before The Hives, i scratched my cornea while pruning bushes and that right there is a pain i do not ever want to revisit. had to go to the optometrist and get The Goo.

- 2 days before Cornea i had my first Botox For Migraine treatment. 31 injections to the face, neck and shoulders. it stung but it was over in like 4 minutes. takes 3 sessions to start kicking in. sessions are 12 weeks apart. so i guess we'll find out in August if it's working.

- day before Botox i had an ENT appointment and he stuck a camera up my nose and then diagnosed me with a weird vocal cord paralysis thing so now i have to go back to speech therapy for the first time in 26 years.

- Week before that, saw my neurologist and she diagnosed me with a weird intermittent lazy eye / motion lag thingamawhatsis so now i have to go to an ophthalmologist AND vision therapy.

- That week I also saw my PCP and explained to her about the intermittent abdominal pain I've been having since like 2021. She took me seriously!!! Which is good!!! But now i am scheduled for baby's first colonoscopy. And i have to keep a food journal, which i HATE because food is STUPID.

- All of the above all happened this month btw. December 1-23.

- My final appt in November was yet another ultrasound of my former left tit because there is an oil cyst at the site of my top surgery and they are VERY SURE it is a benign oil cyst but the rules require them to poke it every few months for 2-3 years.

- Before that I had a 48 hour ambulatory EEG which was the itchiest i have ever been in my LIFE. That same week our basement stairs collapsed and a contractor had to come rebuild them (up! to! code!). That same week i also went to the dentist to get my crown fitted.

- I think my MIL was in the hospital that same week, too. so that's a thing that's been going on the whole time since then.

- I spent most of October deathly ill with food poisoning thst was originally misdiagnosed as viral. I ended up with a CT scan and colitis. and, eventually, cipro. it was the sickest i have ever been in my adult life. i would rather have mono again. i fantasized about those cholera beds with the hole in the center so you didnt have to get up to have your horrid dysentery. nightmare.

- The day before that hit i had ONE golden day where i felt good and had energy. we went to temple and i got glomped by about 10 different people. my 80 year old bestie kept finding me to hug me again. Rabbi hugged me super hard.

- Before that was a root canal, and before that was a tooth infection that took 2 rounds of antibiotics to kill, and before that was the original cavity filling that started it all. the dentist kindly comped me the $172 for the filling against the $3,800 bill for the root canal + crown.

- Before that? IDEK man. I have lost track. Somewhere in there i got diagnosed with insulin resistance which explained my HORRENDOUSLY TERRIBLE fatigue and cloudiness and waking up starving every 3 hours. The meds they gave me changed that literally overnight. it was a miracle. which is why im freaking out about the new migraine med possibly counteracting that. i spent the entirety of last summer in a fog. several of my very good friends visited and all i could do was nap on them. i couldnt go anywhere or do anything. it was a nightmare. i don't want to go back to that. but also i don't want to have a migraine every time the wind blows. but i would rather have a migraine 50% of the time than be back to that fatigue fogged state 100% of the time. nope nope nope.

- and amongst all of this, still having the seizures. they were going down for a while but the last week or so has been 1-2 per day. so. another checkmark in the "gee do you think you're stressed?" column.

- it is going on 10pm and I'm tired so i very likely have accidentally omitted several other things. to be fair to me, there's Quite A Bit to remember.

- so if youre wondering why i havent updated my latest fic, its partly bc i am TIRED and partly bc if i gave jason even a third of the health bullshit i have dealt with the past few months, it would absolutely defy belief. TWO kinds of eye problems AND a speech problem AND food poisoning AND dentistry?? surely no one in the world has to deal with that much!

sigh. anyway. thanks for listening. i promise i am stressed out of my GOURD but, shockingly, have not slid into any sort of depressive space. mostly im just annoyed. i spent today watching dinosaur documentaries and reorganizing my craft supplies.

tomorrow will be better. today just sucked.

[agnaasks]

[please read the previous poems for context ly]

Letters from juliet (IV)

I woke up today and realised

that it isn't about your name not being there on my lips

it's not about the roses not smelling like you

or the coffee not reminding me of us

or me not being afraid of thunder anymore

It's the fact that I wish it wasn't this way

I , deeply, desperately, delusionally wish for -

my lips to be stained by your name

not just roses but every single flower to remind me of you

me to be scared of every thunderstorm

and that is because

a part of me

a stupid godamn part of me

wishes that you'll be there to comfort me

maybe I'm still holding onto that part of me

a poet Ahmad Faraz once said

"ranjish hī sahī dil hī dukhāne ke liye aa

aa phir se mujhe chhoḌ ke jaane ke liye aa"

Just the thought of you coming back generates more happiness than the inherent pain of you walking away

which you will

you always do

with so much ease

it makes me question humanity

Maybe you didn't like me

but just for humanity,

I expected you to turn around

but you didn't

Or maybe you did and I didn't catch you

(Even though I haven't looked away since the first time I saw you)

how is it so easy for you?

how is it so hard for me?

did you ever have tears in your eyes for me?

No

No you didn't

I did

Way too many times

I am drowing in them right now

I don't know why I have them

Maybe I am sad that you have left

maybe I am sad that I didn't leave with you

Maybe I am sad that you left with someone else

Maybe I am worried that this "someone" won't love you as much as I did

Maybe I am worried that this "someone" does love you as much as I did

Maybe I am angry that I made a fool of myself

That I wasted my time on you

maybe that's all you were

a waste of time and energy

maybe that's how I want to remember it

But the stupid part of me won't let that happen

I want to remember you as my first love

As the first person I shared a part of myself with

The first person who made me feel stupid

The person who made me a hopeless romantic

And then left me hopelessly

and now I want to turn into you

I want to pretend to care

I want to pretend to like someone

I don't want to be a hopeless romantic anymore

So that just the way I fixed you

Someone fixes me

I am sure many people want to

Many people are stupid like me

Yk the worst thing about habits?

they take 21 days to form

But won't even go away in 21 years

(I can't confirm it I'm still 16)

"Marne ke baad bhi meri aankhen khuli rhi

Aadat pari thi inhe intezaar ki"

~habits

maybe it's not even the "habit"

maybe it's just the aftertaste of it

maybe the aftertaste is like a scar

which heals over time but still leaves an imprint

"i looked down on my body

only to find myself drowned in those footprints

a sign of visitors"

I have to come to terms with it

That I am here and will always be

But you have walked away

far away

I have to let these scars heal

I have to

I can't let them stay open

they'll catch an infection

maybe I want them to

because that stupid part of me

hopelessly hopes that'll you'll come to treat it

that you'll kiss it better

you won't

someone will

someone will walk in to treat all the wounds they didn't create

someone will walk in to heal something they didn't break

"i saw the tides gently wipe away some of these footprints while leaving the most

only to make space for more visitors to come

the visitors leave , their footprints stay

until another visitor walks over them"

[xxsp3llb0undxx]

The Infectious Colleague - Safety In Numbers

No Pairings for this chapter, backstory on reader before she meets Joel and Tommy - pre-apocalypse [1.6k] DISCLAIMER: DO NOT POST MY WORK TO OTHER SITES OR CLAIM AS YOUR OWN. I DO NOT OWN ANY RIGHTS TO TLOU OR THE CHARACTERS MENTIONED IN THE FIC, I ONLY OWN SOME STORYLINE NOTHING MORE. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED TO THE WRITERS OF TLOU Chapter Summary: Reader is a British biochemist, she works along side close friends, who are also her colleagues, to create vaccines for deadly diseases. Reader was one of the first to come in contact with an infected, her best friend and colleague - Amanda.

WARNINGS: BLOOD ,, GORE ,, CORDYCEPS ,, MENTIONS OF UNALIVING ,, TLOU AU ,, Masterlist ,, Chapter 2 (currently discontinued)

December 29th 2002 - The birthday outing

Y/n had just turned 21, her birthday celebrated with close friends. She just wanted a quiet night in but instead her best friend, Amanda and a few others, had dragged the poor girl out of her house and to a random club in town. The club was packed with people, their bodies rubbing up against others, sweat glistening their skin as they danced around - spilling their drinks on people in the process. Y/n wasn't feeling it, she wanted to watch a random movie from her collection that sat in a stack beside her DVD player. She wanted to snuggle up with her dog on her ratty, old couch that would surely be the reason she cried about her back aching in the morning.

Amanda brought over a bright yellow drink, probably some overly sweet cocktail. Y/n took a sip and then placed it back down, conversing with her friends about how they all had work tomorrow morning and they would all most likely be hungover. The group were having a good time until Amanda had told the group her "boyfriend" was here and he wanted to spend time with her. Y/n knew exactly what was happening, her best friend was hooking up with some dude she had known for like a month. Y/n had told her friend to be safe and to call her when she was home, in which the girl nodded her head and gave her friend a hug goodbye. If only Y/n knew that was going to be the last time she would ever see her best friend.

----

December 30th 2002 - The first case in London, England

Y/n woke up to a thumping in her head, she knew it was stupid to go drinking last night. Just because it was her birthday didn't justify drinking her weight in alcohol, it was stupid. Y/n got out of bed and started getting ready for work, she took a shower, got changed, ate breakfast and then left her house; she was definitely not ready for the day. When she had finally made it to work, she was 10 minutes late, though it seemed like everyone else was running late too. Y/n sat down on her side of the lab, her notebook out and placed on the table as she took off her jacket and replaced it with her lab coat. Half an hour had passed and still no one had showed up, Amanda was nowhere to be seen and she was always the first to show up; still wearing the clothes from the night before. Y/n sighed, reaching into her pocket and pulling her phone out, she sent texts to everyone that was meant to be there today.

The door opened, revealing one of Y/n's colleagues - Josh. His hair was a mess, clothes wrinkled, he looked like he had the flu. His body was spasming ever so slightly, he greeted her with a small smile before sitting down across from her. "Hey, Josh. Have you seen Amanda? She's not answering my messages." The young boy shook his head, he told her the last time he saw Amanda was last night at the club. Y/n texted her friend again before she could send it though, Amanda had burst through the door; her body thrashing about, vine like things slithering under her skin. Her eyes landed on Josh and then Y/n, the pair were frozen - staring at the possessed looking girl in front of them. Then there was a shriek, it came from Amanda. Her body lurched forward, attacking Josh. Biting down into his flesh, the sound of tearing skin emitted throughout the lab, blood spewing out the side of his neck.

Y/n screamed before running out of the room, her mind in a panic. What was that thing? It was Amanda, but it wasn't. The sound of heavy footfalls sounded from behind the frantic girl, she turned her head and saw some feral version of her best friend chasing her down the hall. Blood, still wet, was around her mouth and dripped down her neck, soaking into the collar of her shirt. The blood curdling scream that left her throat was deafening, it was like an alarm signal - notifying others like her where she is. Y/n turned the corner, she was edging closer and closer to the exit, she could almost reach the door before she was ripped away from it. Her body was thrown to the floor, Amanda was still down the hall so who in the world just tackled her to the ground? Josh stood above her, the wound on his neck still bleeding but it also had the same vines coming out of it as Amanda has under her skin. Then it all clicked, Y/n didn't just work as a biochemist for fun, it was something she really enjoyed. The signs her two colleagues were suffering from had to be from a virus but then it made her think more - Amanda bit Josh but he was already exhibiting sign before than but it must've kicked up the process so it had to be a virus that could only be transmitted through person to person, like biting them and drawing blood or maybe even kissing them and they have a cut in their mouth. Y/n didn't now what was causing it but she didn't like it, she wanted it to stop.

Josh had pinned Y/n to the ground, his full weight on her as his jaw snapped at her trying to sink his teeth into her skin. With all her strength, she kicked him off of her. His body sliding across the floor, hitting the wall behind him. Y/n picked up the closest thing to her, a vase, and hit Josh in the head over and over again until he stopped thrashing about - his blood smeared on the floor and all over her hands. Amanda's screams were getting closer, she knew she had to put her friend out of her misery, Y/n just hopes she doesn't make the wrong decision. She puts all her strength into the next swing she makes, the vase connecting with her best friends skull. Blow after blow, until her blood is caked all over Y/n's hands. Tears trail down her face as she hold her best friends body in her arms, fingers stroking her hair as she sobs. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me." Was all Y/n could repeat, over and over again.

------

A week later - January 6th 2003

Y/n had quit work and decided to try and turn her life around, though she didn't know how. She sat in her room thinking over everything that had happened in the last week, what she had done to Amanda and Josh - their motionless bodies covered in blood ingrained in her mind. Y/n didn't feel like doing anything, let alone sitting here while her friend was dead. She pushed the thoughts away as she got up to take a shower, she needed to continue living even if she didn't have the energy to anymore.

After a few days of not doing basic human tasks, Y/n finally got out of bed and cleaned up her house and giving her landlord a notice that she would be moving out in the next month, just enough time for her to find a new house and to clear out all of her things to start a new life. She knew it was going to be tough, leaving everything behind but she had to, staying in the one place that held so many memories of Amanda wasn't helping her at all. No matter where she would go, even if it was to just go into the living room because she forgot something, it all reminded her of Amanda, the way she would get excited when David Bowie would come on the radio or how she did her hair in the morning - it made Y/n feel like she betrayed her best friend. She had to leave, find a place no one knew her and start over.

The next couple weeks were tough, packing up her life and talking to her new landlord to settle the date she would move in. Boxes were filled to the brim with books, random decorations, DVD's and music CD's. Y/n's clothes and other personal belongings were packed into various suitcases, her life now fitting into a few boxes and bags - seeing everything put away made her belongings look little, like she didn't own much. Y/n looked around her house once more, storing her memories away in the back of her mind as she picked up the last remaining things before leaving the building. She sent a message to the movers letting them know the key to the house was under a potted plant beside the door and what things needed to be put in the back of the van for moving. In a few hours she would be starting a new life, saying she was scared would be an understatement - Y/n didn't know how to feel, this was her first time leaving the country and she was petrified.

[littleperilstories]

The Prince of Thieves: When You Play With Fire, Someone's Bound to Get Burned

Mood Boards | Chapter Titles | Also on A03!

Warnings: Fantasy-esque prison setting, infection, infected wounds, mention of abusive parent / physical abuse, mention of nausea (nothing happens), betrayal

THIS CHAPTER + THIS CHAPTER + today's chapter all have their origins in Whumptober Day 15 (lies, new scars, breathing through the pain), and while a surprising amount of the original prose stayed in, the actual details play out differently. Fun!

Previous | Masterlist | Next

Word count: 3080 || Approx reading time: 12 mins

When You Play With Fire, Someone's Bound to Get Burned

Teaser: I wish I could see her in brighter light, actually see the colour of her eyes as she watches me with worry on her face. Yellow torchlight, deceiving and dim, reveals so few of her features. All obscured by darkness, except the anxiousness she is not bothering to hide.

Will

“Fox!”

A voice, calling my name that is not my name from deep within inky darkness.

“Fox!”

I wish they’d stop, whoever they are.

“Fox, please, you’re scaring me.”

It is those last three words that catch me, sinking hooks into my skin and dragging me upwards from sleep. Opening my eyes reveals the now-familiar crack in the ceiling of my cell. It swims and dances a little.

“Fox.”

When I turn my head, I see Bree on her feet, manacled arm stretched taut behind her. She’s as far from the wall as the chain will allow, staring at me.

“What’s got you so worked up?” She looks distressed. I can’t quite puzzle out the reason.

“For heaven’s sake,” she says. “I’ve been trying to wake you.”

“Why?”

She points to the food and water someone must have dropped off while I was asleep. “You’ve been sleeping for hours. When was the last time you ate or drank?”

“I dunno.”

She gestures again, as if I didn’t understand the first time. “You need to finish all of that.”

The sight of it makes my stomach turn. I’m not sure I can even start it, let alone finish it. “You’re bossy, anyone ever tell you that?”

“Please,” she says. “You need to drink. And eat.”

God, I’m cold. Is the chill from outside somehow leaking into the cells? How long have we been down here? Did I fall asleep and wake up in midwinter? “You really woke me up for that?”

The hurt is gone from her face almost as quickly as it appears, settling into unbudging resolve. “I’m trying to help you.”

She reminds me of Colette, sharp-eyed and serious and annoyingly unwilling to back down when she thinks she’s right.

Sitting up ushers more chill to wrap around me like a bitter wind. “God, it’s fucking f-freezing in here.”

She doesn’t confirm whether this is true or if it’s just me. “Fox. Please.”

“I’m really n-not h-hungry.”

Is that me? Am I the one who’s stuttering like that? Shit. What the hell is the matter with me?

She doesn’t speak again or even sit down to give her stretched-out arm a rest until I give into her glare and take a sip of water. “You can’t just…not eat.” Her voice cracks.

“You sound like my b-b—” Fuck. Fuck. I clamp my mouth closed, catching the tip of my tongue between my front teeth and making it bloom with pain. What am I doing? I almost said, You sound like my brother.

Shifting back a little to put more slack in the chain on her arm, she winces slightly and runs her fingers over what must be bruised, irritated skin. “You’re not well. At all.”

The stupidity, the fucking obviousness, of this statement makes me choke. When I finish coughing, she’s gone white, pulling on the chain again.

“See?”

“It’s not a real cough,” I explain. “Relax. I’m f-fine.”

Fine except I’m cold and exhausted and yes, in pain, but that’s not so unusual these days, and not hungry and a little dizzy and…

Fuck.

“Fox.” I wish I could see her in brighter light, actually see the colour of her eyes as she watches me with worry on her face. Yellow torchlight, deceiving and dim, reveals so few of her features. All obscured by darkness, except the anxiousness she is not bothering to hide. “Let me see your back.”

“No.” I don’t want to know what’s lurking on my skin where I cannot see. If there’s infection there, I’d rather just let it kill me.

“Please.”

“There’s n-nothing you can do about it.” Michaelson made sure of that when he tethered her to the back wall. Perhaps, even more than that, I don’t want her to do anything about it.

I hate the way she blinks at me, like she’s trying to hide tears. Why should she cry? Die in here, die out there, it’s all the same.

“I couldn’t wake you up at first,” she whispers. I have to strain to hear her. “I’m scared you’re dying.”

Am I dying? Between the shoulder, the back, and now the burns on my arms, maybe something has wormed its way in and is now eating me from the inside out. Maybe…

Maybe that’s for the best.

She’s still staring. What the fuck am I supposed to say to her? I wrap my arms around my knees, trying to catch any warmth still left in my body.

“You’re shivering.”

“Y-yes.”

“Fox, please eat. I don���t—I can’t—” She’s fighting really damn hard not to let those tears fall. “Don’t leave me here alone.”

Her eyes widen and a few unintelligible sounds fall from her mouth like raindrops, as if she didn’t mean to say the last part. “I— I’m sorry— That’s selfish—”

It is.

It is fucking selfish. No one drags her out of her cell, smacks her around, brings her back with burns or bruises or cuts on her skin. Not that I want them to, but… It’s me, it’s always me, always me coming back and seeing her curled up by the wall, shivering and looking angry or upset but otherwise fucking unharmed, and she doesn’t want me to die and leave her here alone?

“It’s not up to me,” I tell her. “I’ve s-seen my execution notice. Already—already printed.” I swallow, my mouth suddenly gone dry. “Bulwell…showed it to me.”

This time, she can’t help it. A tear, shimmering in the flickering light, glides down her cheek, followed by another. “I didn’t know—You didn’t tell m—”

“I know.” I want to be angrier than I am. She has no right to wish for me to live so I can keep her company through the darkest of her days when my days are even darker. But I have to believe that it isn’t only selfishness fuelling that wish.

That maybe when she looks at me, she doesn’t see a stupid, reckless, moronic, fucked-up son of a whore like the constables do, but something else. Someone else. Someone more.

She has no right to beg me to stay alive for her, but she does it anyway.

I squeeze my eyes closed, because if I don’t, I’m going to be crying, too.

“I don’t want you to die,” she says. Her voice pricks through the darkness that I know will drag me back into unconsciousness if I let it. “You’re a good person.”

When I open my eyes again, she’s again straining against her chain. Her arm must hurt, and still she tries to close the distance between us, even though it is impossible. “You d-don’t know me.”

“You saved my life,” she says. “You had no reason to get involved that night, but you did.”

“Stop bringing that up like it means anything.”

“It does fucking mean something!” The snapping of the chain rings through the air. “I’d have been dead long ago if it weren’t for you! Nothing but a half-naked, frozen corpse—” She chokes into silence.

Shit. “I didn’t mean—”

“And the first time,” she goes on, not letting me finish, “the first night we met, you were with Sp—with her, and you whispered in my ear, you said it would be all right, you tried to make me feel less scared and you didn’t have to do that. I’d just stolen from your friend and we didn’t know each other at all, but you made sure I knew she wasn’t going to kill me.”

I’m blinking again, but this time it’s not to fight back tears. “What?”

“I know you don’t remember,” she says, “and that’s fine, it was a long time ago, but I do.”

Trying to recall whatever the hell she’s talking about is like swimming through a murky lake. “I don’t—”

“There was one other time,” she whispers. “Last summer. You never saw me. I wanted—I wanted to thank you then, for saving me, I mean, but you were across the market. I recognized you. You weren’t… Your face wasn’t covered.”

Last summer… Market…

“A child stole something from one of the stalls.” Finally, she drifts back again, letting her arm fall. “The vendor, he—he was about to beat that poor boy.”

Oh. I remember, I think. Geoff, I’m pretty sure, was there that day. He smacked me on the back of the head for being a reckless idiot, but he was smiling while he did it. And he didn’t go running to rat me out to Jamie, which was enough to tell me he wasn’t really mad.

“I saw you,” she says. “I don’t know how you did it, but you somehow swiped something else right from his stall and convinced him it was the one that boy stole.”

“That s-sounds very dishonest. Couldn’t have been m-me.”

“It was you,” she insists. “It was you, and you saved that boy from being beaten in front of everyone that day. And you sent him off with the bread, or whatever it was, so he wouldn’t go hungry.”

“All that fuss for a loaf of bread? Maybe I just d-didn’t like that vendor and I was trying to piss him off.”

“You’re an idiot.” Relaxing a little, she crosses her arms, fingers back where they were before, gently massaging the skin on her shackled wrist. “I may not know you well, but I know you’re a good man. And I told you—I haven’t met many.”

Despite everything—how much my body hurts, how truly rotten I feel, how if I don’t die in this cell I’m going to die in the execution square—I smile.

“If you’re c-calling me an idiot,” I manage, “then I guess you know s-something about me, at least.”

She laughs, and in the darkness, it’s almost like a light. “Don’t give up. Not yet. Please.”

Truly, I am not sure how much choice I have.

“Please.”

With a groan, I tear off a piece of bread, even though  the sight of it still makes me feel ill. “Bossy and annoying.”

The ghost of a smile tugs at her lips. “I prefer persistent.”

I make it halfway through the bread before I have to stop. I have a feeling I will bring it up at some point. Closing my eyes, I breathe deeply, trying to settle my stomach.

“Fox?”

“I’m fine.” In. Out. “I’m just tired.”

Of course she doesn’t believe me.

“Don’t sleep yet,” she says. “Drink more water.”

I do as she says.

“Talk to me.” I’m still sitting up, but I nearly drop the cup after nodding off and jerking suddenly awake. “Keep talking. Tell me a story. It’s your turn.”

Bree doesn’t argue. “What kind of story do you want?”

“Tell me about you. Where did you come from? Why’d you join IA?”

The questions make her flinch. “That’s not a happy story.”

I gesture to our surroundings. “You don’t say.”

She smiles at the sarcasm, but her face is wan. “You really want to know?”

“Yes.” If only just to keep me awake a little longer.

She takes a long breath. “I grew up rich.”

“Lucky you.”

“Thanks.” The word drips with insincerity. “It didn’t last. I was eleven, I suppose. When…business turned bad. My father… He lost everything. And so did we.”

I nod. Jamie once worked for a family that went through the same thing.

“My father was always…horrible.” Her voice shakes slightly. “There was never a time when he was, well, kind.”

Good people. I haven’t met many of those.

“But he was so much worse after that. Humiliated, I suppose, by whatever terrible business decisions made him lose it all. And when you’re already a royal prick…”

I’m glad I can’t stomach anything else, because if I had just taken a sip of water, I’d have spit it out.

“I’m s-sorry,” I say. “It’s not funny.”

She watches me without irritation. Still concerned. “It’s all right. He was a royal prick. The first in a long string of horrible people who thought they should…”

Her voice trails off.

Suddenly, nothing she’s saying seems funny. “He beat you.” I don’t know how I know, but she confirms it with a nod.

“And my mother, yes.”

If I had more energy, I’d be fucking livid. “Fucking bastard.” My dad, before he died, would get mad sometimes too. But never, never, would he have ever laid a hand on me or Jamie or Ma. “If I thought I was getting out of here, I’d offer to kick his ass for you.”

She snorts. “No need. He’s dead.” The words melt into a sigh. “I remember one day in particular. The day he let all the servants go. He turned them out on the street.”

My skin prickles, and this time it is not because of the chills wracking my body.

“So many of them wept.” Rattling fills the air as she shifts again, drawing her knees to her chest and hugging them tightly. “Grown men, grown women. They had nowhere to go.”

Dreamy darkness slithers toward me as she talks. “There was one boy. One of the youngest who worked for us. I don’t remember what he looked like. Isn’t that awful?” She gives a humourless laugh. “If I ran into him on the street, I wouldn’t know him. But I remember that he shouted at my father, tried to demand that everyone get the wages they were owed. He was so angry. And so sad.”

No, I think. It can’t be.

I know this story. I’ve heard it before.

“I… I was so stupid. Naive.” She shakes her head, decade-old anger spilling into the motion. “I ran out, shouted at him, told my father he couldn’t be so cruel. I don’t know how old that boy was, fourteen, sixteen? Somewhere around there. Young.” She bites her lip. “James. That was his name.”

Breathing has become, quite suddenly, very difficult.

“I watched my father fling that boy…”

Into a snowdrift. It’s no longer Bree’s voice telling the story, but Jamie’s. The ice shards sliced into my skin. I found cuts all on my hands and face later.

She was the girl, then, who tried to stop the master of the house from turning my brother out onto the street. Just as she knew me from afar before she ever gave me her name, this girl is one I know only from story, from legend: the little girl with reed-thin limbs and a shrill voice who begged her father not to sentence Jamie to a life of destitution.

“I think I knew even then.” Her voice. No longer shrill and childish, now soft and weary and sad. “I knew I could never be like my father. That when the chance came to do something better with my life—something good—I would take it.”

I don’t know how Colette finds them. How she knows which folks, in their hearts, have this desire to do good in the world. How Colette found her.

Perhaps I’m glad she did.

“Father died,” she says flatly. “My mother was already dead by then, and when he was gone…” She swallows. Hard. “I was almost free.”

“Almost?” I’m surprised by how far away my own voice sounds.

“I was to be married.” Now she grows sharp, all blade-edges and knife-points. “I chose differently. I ran away, and I lived on my own for months. And then Spider… She… When the chance to do something good for people who had nothing, when that opportunity finally presented itself… That little wooden coin…” She smiles. Sadly. “It changed my life.”

I want to tell her that I probably was the one who whittled that coin. One of the few jobs Jamie was actually right to trust me with.

I want to ask her why she ran away from her fiancé.

I want to tell her I’m almost—almost— glad she got busted by Colette’s pickpocket trap and got tapped to be a runner, even though it led her here.

I want to tell her I’m glad she trusted me with her sad story even though I cannot tell her mine.

I’m so fucking tired.

I don’t realize I’ve fallen asleep, or maybe passed out cold, until I jerk awake, nausea pressing upon my tongue and stomach. I want to move, give myself a chance to retch if it comes to that, but I’m dizzy even though I’m lying still.

Muddled thoughts pool together, sluggish trickles in a drought-stricken river.

Her. It was her. Way back then.

I feel sick.

My shoulder hurts.

She knows Jamie’s name, but she doesn’t know she knows it.

Those burns are fucking driving me mad.

My back hurts.

I’m going to throw up.

Everything hurts.

It was her.

Just breathe.

Her voice cuts through the mud. “Tell him I’m ready to talk.”

It takes me a long time—too long—to understand what she means. Who she wants to speak to.

It’s only when he arrives, his body blocking out the maddening torchlight, that I start to comprehend.

“I want to make a deal,” Bree Cooper says.

Panic fights into my throat. No. I need to sit up, stand up. Stop her. Don’t.

“What do you think you have that you could possibly offer me, Miss Cooper?” Hatchett leans on the bars of her cell, arms crossed, watching her struggle against the chain that leashes her in place.

“Why don’t we have a conversation and you can find out?”

Move! I give my body an order. It does not obey.

Her voice is smooth as butter, slick and oily like I have never heard it before. “Don’t you want to know if I’m bluffing?”

Don’t.

This cannot be the same girl who tried to help Jamie all those years ago.

James. That was his name.

Does she know? Has she known, somehow, this whole time? Is my brother’s name the information she will trade for her freedom?

“Don’t,” I rasp. It’s the only word my tongue can form. She glances at me, but she doesn’t say anything. Her eyes are chips of ice, slicing into bare skin from the belly of a snowdrift.

Maybe she’s been lying to me this whole time.

They were right, I realize. Everyone who has ever said I was an idiot. Stupid. Brainless, reckless, impulsive, naive. They were right.

I know you’re a good man.

No. All I am is a bloody fool.

Previous | Masterlist | Next

Tagging: @starlit-hopes-and-dreams, @gala1981, @kixngiggles .

[anfroginous]

Hatchetfield OC Week Day 2: Apotheosis

When Sam woke up, he woke up in the attic. Ze quickly realized that he must have been in there for too long, so ze headed downstairs. To check how long he was asleep, ze found his phone and–

Holy shit ze was gonna be late for school Oh no, he might be running late. Don't care don't care don't care

Ze quickly got his stuff ready, and was just about to ask his mom for a ride (his dad left the house early on weekdays). The only thing is that she wasn't there.

This should unnerve him, and cause him to rethink everything from this morning. Ze should have at least a bit of common sense, a bit of a gut feeling that this isn't good. But if there's one thing the adults in Sam's life say about him that's actually true– apart from the attitude problem– is that he has no common sense.

So ze thinks back to his deal, and thinks his mom gone as being part of "a better life." And so ze walks to school– it's far, but as it turns out he woke up early. When ze gets there, sweat drenched and huffing from carrying his backpack for so long, it's still 30 minutes before Hatchetfield High School actually starts.

Luckily, he can always count on some people to be there before him.

"I need a smoke," ze says, dropping down zir backpack before Danny "Zoinked" Reynolds.

Today, Zoinked is untalkative, but seems to be very high. Wordlessly, he rolls up a blunt, and Sam accepts.

"Thanks, Zoinked," Sam says, and smokes it.

And then ze starts coughing.

At first it's a small cough, one he could probably shake off, but then the cough gets more wet and more painful. Soon enough ze's on his hands and knees, and Sam realizes for the first time that the smoke cloud is blue.

Eventually, too little oxygen to the brain kills, and the last thing Sam sees is Zoinked staring at zem, with a wide, toothy grin upon his face. His eyes, which are normally a deep brown, are blue.

And when the body of Sam is reanimated, well, Sam is no more. Instead he is a part of something larger, of something grander:

The Hive.

Woohoo! Yeah! Sam got infected by smoking weed xD

Fully headcanon Danny is the son of Dan Reynolds, and has some stupid nickname like "Zoinked".

@hatchetfieldocweek

[thetenamongstthesethrees]

TW: REFERENCE TO SH AND RELAPSE OF SH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT

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Ok so ik ive been inactive for a *WHILE* and im srry for that but like i have a buncha things that happened these past 3 months that I NEED To share SOOOO....

First things first, the one im most excited abt: I DID MY FIRST PERFORMANCE!!! My school was doing little mermaid jr and I got Scuttle! I was really happy to get my first role and getting at least one solo, and Im just happy overall on how it went! I think I did really good on my first try! Only bad thing was that now im kinda going through my lil mermaid hyperfixation and have been looking up fics where Sebastian and Ariel kinda have a Father/Parental Figure-Daughter or Older Brother-Younger (stupid but ultimately well meaning) Sister dynamic and have started to write a fic on that bc no ones done it before apparently😒(im going cray cray, bonkers mayhaps)

Might've gotten my eye infected(I live in the east of the us, new york to be more specific and woke up the day after the "live vintage (BLAME CANADA/j) filter" with my right eyes nerves slightly more irritated and haven't gotten that checked out so thats fun)

FINALLY finished that one drawing ive been making for 3 MONTHS.(well, technically....)

Almost done writing my passion project, AKA the one I originally wanted to make into an animated series but have settled for a book just in case that can't happen! I still need to work out some kinks, design more outfits, get all their personalities in check, make sure the world and magic is fully fleshed out, ect.

I also do band, and while I originally thought that I would have a problem bc of both band and theatres close scheduling(i originally had dress rehearsal on june 2nd, AND my band concert on June 2nd) but it all worked out in the end! My band concert went great, and while the dress rehearsal was a mess, we at least got through it! :)

Unintentionally quit SH! I was originally only meant to stop until AFTER performances, but ive been bettering myself and learned that if I ever want to forgive myself or at least move on I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and not forget nor forgive, but remember, i just can't let it haunt me. I know I'll relapse, I always do eventually, but I want to enjoy these few moments of mental "clarity" while I can. I've also learned that for some reason i tend to become a more terrible person and despicable person the more time I spend at home with my mother, so that's fun. God, I hate America's education system, its messed me up BAD. AND the foster care system. I just tried to kms 2 times today, and she didn't even notice, or care. How sad is that?

On a lighter note, yes, as the rest of yt and TikTok, I got a minor lil hyperfixation on the Lorax and really think ppl should make more [PLATONIC] Lorax and Onceler dynamics, mainly the type where they're like some really annoying pair of bickering siblings or a father whos sick of his adopted child's shit, like there is so much on the table for platonic fluff and angst and most of what I've seen is romantic smut and fluff like CHANGE IT UP A LIL

Also, Ive been going to karaoke centers on Tuesdays and have become a lot more confident to performing in front of ppl! So far, I've performed "All You Wanna Do", "The Ballad of Jane Doe", "Heart of Stone", and am gonna do "What the World Needs" the next upcoming Tuesday, where I'm gonna try interacting with the audience while singing!!

(Also, before I end this....I may have ADHD??? my teacher who has ADHD says some of my behavior is "similar to hers"(i feel like thats just her way of saying i reek of neurodivergency) and I also did some research and I display similar/exact behaviors listed, have taken online tests from doctorate confirmed sites and basically all of them said to go get a diagnosis. I also found I do a few behaviors similar to stimming! Also also, I kinda suspect a lil more bc my mom has Autism and apparently sometimes neurodivergency is biological (i forgor the word) but my mom is kinda in denial abt my Depression diagnosis and thinks I got anxiety "biologically", so if I tell her I wanna get tested for ADHD shes just kinda gonna gaslight me into not believing that and i already told the school therapist and basically she just told me that I'm probably just imagining things or copying behaviors from my mother and that "kids like to give themselves all these titles nowadays" so I just did what I always do which is to keep it shut and act until they think you fell in line)

So yeah, thats all! Thanks for reading, now that my schedule is clear again ima start posting more frequently again, so be aware :) <3333

[classic-toxic-medicine]

September 10

I think if I ever have that dream again, the one about the bar where all my friends are saving a seat for me, I may finally go up to the bartender. I've had this dream for a while now, even if sometimes the bartender is a different guy. They've never really acknowledged me coming in.

He was not the same back when I first had this type of dream back when I was a child while I was in a coma after being struck by lightning. The one back then did acknowledge me...and he looked so sad back then, told me I couldn't stay there, that it was no place for a kid. I did stay a while though because I just didn't want to go back to my grandparents. I did leave though, and when I did, I woke up. That was the only time I'd been acknowledged in these kinds of "dreams".

I don't know why I have them more often. Maybe it's because death follows me. I should be dead. I should have died so many times over throughout my whole life.

Once as a baby with scarlet fever. I'd also had other childhood diseases that nearly killed me when I was young.

Once as a young child on a boat with his horrible grandparents.

Once as a child who had been struck by a horse.

Once as a child who had been bitten by a rabid dog and left untreated for days, leading to a horrible infection. My nanny who had been on vacation beforehand helped get me to a doctor who saved me from sepsis and rabies. They'd caught the dog right after and it was clearly rabid and died from it.

Once as a teenager doing stupid things with friends, hitchhiking, leading us to being kidnapped....They died, but I had lived. I had gotten away. They still haunt me.

Once as a teenager in an automobile accident from a seizure.

Countless times as a young man on the front lines of war.

Once as a young man in 1919 in Boston on a January afternoon when a tank holding molasses burst. My daughter had been with me for the day, and I saved her and myself climbing a tree.

The first time going through respawn and countless more times when the system glitched. They tried to kill me like the others, but I was successful in coming back...They died, but I lived.

When I was put in Cryo. They'd wanted me dead, but Lawrence volunteered me as a last resort...They then used me for years, waking me up and making me do their bidding before putting me back like some sort of tool.

When I escaped.

When I nearly walked into traffic having an episode...

Too many times to count.

I think I'll take a nap sometime today when I feel too tired to keep my eyes open.

[sashi-ya]

SFW ~ Trafalgar D. Water Law x Reader ~ Law Comforting Sick! Reader

So, as you probably don’t know I suffer from a bunch of autoimmune diseases. This type of illnesses makes our body to attack itself. It takes us a long time to be at least diagnosed with one of them. For some reason the medical field fails every time when it comes to this type of diseases, specially when you are young. I’m a nurse myself and also a med student, I can assure you it’s been times I had to fight with my superiors to make them believe in a young person in pain. I know how hard it is. Lately I’ve been experiencing flares up constantly. My bones hurt, my legs, arms, and hands. I feel weak and lightheaded. Migraines annoy me too. My muscles become a little weak so I can hold stuff properly. It is difficult for me to type but I managed to find a way of creating using my phone’s “voice to text” system. You may say I should stop, but frankly Tumblr has become a place where I am truly happy, this makes me feel better every time. Thank u all. I wanted to write this as a way of comfort. And hope that if you are going through this or whatever type of illness, this short story could help you at least a little. Please, don’t you ever stop trying. You deserve a diagnose and proper treatment. Don’t let people judge you. You are not lazy; you are not lying, and this is not because of stress. These illnesses are REAL. Please, keep going until a doctor helps you. Me myself, as a future doctor I promise to always believe you when you tell me it hurts. Love you all ♥ ~

TW: Reader is sick. Fluff and comfort.

WC: 1K

The first time, it was a plate. It has fallen into the floor, shattered in a million pieces. “I’m so sorry, Penguin” you instantly apologize to your nakama. “Don’t worry, it’s ok! Bring the broom, let's clean this before someone steps on it” Penguin calmed you down. You were helping him to make dinner for your crew, and your hands stopped responding.

At first everybody just thought you were clumsy, but then, as the pain grew stronger each time things changed…

Not only were you dropping things, but also you usually spend more time in your room sleeping and less with your nakamas. Law, your captain, at first thought you were feeling sad or depressed, still let some weeks pass by just to study your case from a distance. He is not the warmest man in the world, but he takes care of his nakamas like no one.

Someday you woke up, everything hurt more than ever. Your joints hurt, your legs too. Your hands were unable to move properly. You didn’t have any muscle strength whatsoever. And what was worse, the next day, your crew would arrive at a new island. How were you supposed to help them if you were feeling like this?... Not only that, but also, they didn’t know about your illness. You decided it wasn’t going to be something that stopped you in any way, so you didn’t tell them. What if because of your stupid health Law wouldn’t allow to join them any longer? No. They were your family, you can’t lose them… you couldn’t lose Law.

Not only Law didn’t know about how bad you felt, but also how in love you were with him.

Time passed; tears formed in the corners of your eyes. It hurt, hurt like a bitch. Everything felt swollen, sensitive. Your joints seemed to have water inside them. You pray no one would notice your absence, at least for today. You reached your painkillers from your nightstand but realized there was no water. “Damn…”.

You adopted a fetal position under the blankets. A migraine pumped in your head, making everything so fuzzy. Your skin burned, somehow your stupid body has managed to run a fever. Not because you were going through an infection, but because everything was so inflamed, your body reacted to that too. Sweating and trembling, you wished it was over soon. Why must a young person like you suffer this?

Suddenly, a knock on the door. “(Name)-ya, can you open, please?”. Law, he was here. You were sure he was fed up with a weak crew member. You tried to stand up, it was so hard, but you did it. Every step you take, your heels and ankles hurt. Unlocking the door was hell. You were a mess.

“C-captain?” you ask, acting as if everything was alright. Law looked different today, he was wearing his white coat. “Damn, he knows?” you thought. Of course, he knew, he is the best doctor you have ever met in your life. “Let’s go to the infirmary, ok?” he said, and you only nodded. But even if you wanted, your legs wouldn’t respond as they should.

“You can’t even walk, right?” Law asked, holding you from your side. “I can’t” you accept, looking into the ground. “Then why didn’t you tell me?” he told, lifting you up in his arms. Being in his arms felt so safe and secure, it even eased the pain away for a moment. Your legs hanging, your arms around Law’s neck. Your head over his chest. The warmth of his skin felt so good…

He slowly deposited in the infirmary bed. Quickly put a wet towel on your forehead. “I think I know what’s going on with you, but why don’t you tell me. Please” he asked, sitting at your side, legs crossed and hand pressing the towel. You looked at him, shivering. “It’s an autoimmune disease. My bones hurt, my head too, my body hates me” you told him, right away. “Please, don’t leave me. I want to stay with you…” you beg, crying.

“Who said I was leaving you? Don’t be silly, (Name)-ya. I wouldn’t leave you, and even if you weren't able to navigate anymore, I’d still stay by your side. Every one of us will” Law told you, smiling. The sincerest smile you have ever seen in your life. “Take this meds, you will feel better in a couple of hours” he said. Law helped you sit on the bed, gave you some pills and water. His left hand caressed your back up and down, while the right one tucked your hair behind your ears.

You felt better instantly, it was Law's love that was curing the pain. He helped you lay on bed once more and sat next to you on bed. "You should sleep, ok?" He commanded you. "Y-yes… could you stay here with me?" You asked, knowing that might be too much.

"Of course, I wasn't going anywhere" he said. You smiled, so loved and protected. You reached his leg and snuggled hugging it. Your bones still hurt, some tears still ran through your cheeks, but you smiled.

"I'm sorry I can't ease the pain faster. I'm really sorry" Law told you, also with tears in his eyes. That feeling of not being able to help the ones he loves, once again. He grazed your cheeks, so softly and kindly. "I couldn't feel better, Law. Thank you. I love you". You told him, quickly realizing you just confessed your love for him. Your eyes widened; you buried your head on his thigh.

Law was silent. Your heart beating faster, ready to leave your body. Suddenly your crush stood up. You have crossed the line, now Law was leaving you in the next port for sure.

He walked away, you didn't want to see where. Suddenly a pain even stronger than physical hit you. He was leaving you…

"Made some space silly" you heard Law said on your back. You slowly turned around, looking at him. Law was taking his coat off. He entered into the bed and hugged you from behind. Hand on your belly, a kiss planted on your nape.

"Love you too, now rest" ♡ ~

[andvys]

stubborn love part 8

warnings: angst, violence

pairing: Ellie Williams x reader 

You woke up to the feeling of soft lips against your neck, a hand gripping your waist, sighing at the feeling you turned around, facing Ellie. 

“good morning.” she whispered, smiling at you. 

“morning babe.” you blushed, thinking back to last night, when you realized you were both naked under the blanket.

Ellie chuckled at how flustered you'd gotten, “you are so cute y/n.” she smiled, pulling you into a hug.

“so are you.” you told her, grinning when she started protesting. 

You pressed a kiss on her neck and laid your head on her chest, enjoying the quiet morning with her.

“so who are you patrolling with today?” Ellie asked, slightly worried that you'd have to go on Patrol with Alicia again. 

“group patrol with Joel.” you replied.

“you finally agreed huh?” she chuckled.

Joel always asked you to join him on the group patrols he was doing, he usually took a few people into the small towns near Jackson, keeping eye out for infected or hunters but he would also let the people check out the old stores there and let them take a few things back.

Group patrols weren't really your thing and you didn't feel comfortable enough, going on patrol with people you barely knew but you finally agreed, you couldn't say no to the poor man any longer, plus you trusted him, so at least he was there.

“yeah I couldn't resist his puppy eyes.” you said making Ellie laugh.

“puppy eyes? this man is anything but a puppy.” she chuckled.

“no.. I'm sure he's a puppy, look at him, he looks warm and fluffy.” 

Ellie laughed even more at your words. 

“You wouldn't say that if you knew him before coming to Jackson.” she said, gripping your waist tighter.

“hmm okay whatever you say.” you sighed. “who are you patrolling with?”

“Jesse. it’s just a short route, I’ll be home before you.” 

You chuckled, “oh so you can start cooking dinner.” you teased knowing how much she hated cooking.

“y/n, I don’t want you to die because of my horrible cooking, I can make you a sandwich though.” she laughed, running her fingers through your hair.

“I'll accept the sandwich.” you smiled, kissing her neck, she squeezed your butt in response, earning a slight groan from you.

You looked up at her, noticing the smirk on her face. 

“we still have some time.” she suggested, leaning down to kiss your lips. 

“hmm, let's make the best out of it then.” you winked at her.

She grinned at you before grabbing your face to kiss you.

-

“hi.” you greeted Joel, who was by the gates with his horse.

“mornin’ kid, how’re you doin’?” he asked, smiling at you.

“i’m good, you?” you smiled at him.

“me too, i’m happy you finally agreed to come with us.”

“yeah it was about time.” you chuckled.

“you can bring back a gift for your girlfriend.” he winked at you before getting on his horse when the rest of the group arrived.

You blushed, you and Ellie never really talked about what you were. It was obvious that you were dating, you just never discussed labels.

“yeah.” you laughed before getting on your horse as well.

-

You were riding side by side with Joel, the other three men who were with you, were riding behind you. 

The air was fresh and you enjoyed the smell of fall, the slightly cold weather gave you a comforting feeling. Fall has always been your favorite season. You loved it when the leaves started turning orange and yellow and you could just wear Ellie’s big hoodies and flannels without having to take them off because it was getting too warm, like in the summer. 

“Ellie never shuts up about you, you know?” Joel said, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You looked over at him in surprise, you didn't know that she was talking to Joel about you. 

“don't look so surprised kid.” he chuckled at your facial expression. “she always asked for advice.” 

Furrowing your brows, you asked yourself when she told him about having a crush on you.

“I- since uh when?” you stammered, blushing slightly.

“well she talked about you right from the start.” he said, smiling at you “and you were the only friend of her’s, that she was telling me about.” he pointed out. 

You smiled at that thought, you knew there was a time where she didn't talk much about anything to anyone, so you were surprised to find out that she was talking about you. 

“she loves you y/n, don't ever doubt that. no matter what might've happened between the two of you before that.” he told you, giving you a reassuring smile.

You smiled back at him, appreciating the way he was talking to you. Ellie was basically his daughter, so this conversation could've gone way differently, he could've been stern about it but he was nice and supporting. 

-

Once you'd gotten to the small town, everyone went into opposite directions. This place was relatively safe since groups would come back here all the time to clear off any infected so you didn't have to worry about running into a small herd or anything. 

You've never been here but you knew that Ellie came here with Joel occasionally. She probably got you that flannel from one of the old stores here. You were surprised to see that the houses and stores here weren't as run down like they were in other places.

You walked into a store that seemed to look like an old gaming store or something of that sort, you looked around and saw that most of the shelves were still full. If this was a gun store, you would've never found the shelves being full. 

You looked through the games and found one that Ellie and Jesse have been talking about a few days ago, you put it in your backpack, along with a few comics. 

You kept going through all the other stores, putting some stuff in your backpack that you could find useful later for whenever you had to go out on patrol. 

You heard footsteps behind you when you were about to walk into an old music store, turning around you saw Joel heading your way, some blood splattered on his clothes. You furrowed your brows and looked at him in concern.

“what happened?” you asked, eying the blood.

“a couple of infected made it into one of the old buildings, no big deal.” he told you. “you found anything kid?” he asked.

“I haven't found any infected. no.” you answered, causing him to chuckle.

“I meant, you found anything for yourself?” he smiled.

“oh!” you laughed “yeah, some things for Ellie and uh some knifes?” you chuckled. 

“and here I thought you'd go and find yourself some pretty things.” he chuckled, shaking his head. 

“..well, I get Ellie a bracelet.” you shrugged, feeling a little flustered. 

You've never been in a relationship before so it was new to you to show affection for your girlfriend in front of others.

“that’s nice kid, you should get yourself something too.” he said, squeezing your shoulder before he walked past you. 

“yeah..” 

-

Ellie just got back home from patrol with Jesse and parted ways with him to go home. Right when she was about to get the keys out of her backpack she noticed that her door was open. 

Furrowing her brows, she looked around in confusion, she could've sworn that she closed it when she left this morning and she knew you weren't back yet and even if you would've never left the door open.

Pushing it open slowly, she wasn't expecting someone to stand there. Especially not her.

“what the hell are you doing here?!” she grumbled, throwing the door open, she walked inside. 

Alicia turned around and chuckled, holding Ellie’s journal in her right hand while her left hand held a polaroid picture of you.

“I love her so much, no wait, I am in love with her. she is the most beautiful girl that I’ve ever seen in my life, she’s like the sunshine after the rain, anytime I'm with her, I forget about every worry that I have. I wish I could just tell her how much I love her.” Alicia read from Ellie’s diary. “blah blah blah.” 

“You really are pathetic Ellie. You loved her so much and yet you were with other’s all the time, that doesn't seem like love to me.” she said, glaring at Ellie. “you don't deserve her.” 

Anger poured through Ellie at her sight of her and her words. “and you deserve her?” she scoffed.

“yeah, I’d be much better for her. I could actually treat her right.” she shrugged, smirking at Ellie. 

“yeah right, you fucking crazy bitch could treat her right?” Ellie laughed, causing Alicia to clench her jaw at her words.

“you are so fucking stupid, you don't even get that she never liked you do you? As I have told you before, you were a distraction and now you won’t even get the hint that she wants nothing to do with you.” Ellie said, shaking her head.

“shut up.” Alicia mumbled, gripping the journal tightly in her hand.

“she loves me and if you think that she would leave me for you then you're even dumber than I thought.” Ellie told her as she was feeling the anger building up in her. 

“she doesn’t have to leave you if you're gonna be dead.” Alicia said through gritted teeth, throwing the journal on the table next to her, she pulled a knife out of her pocket.

Ellie looked at her in disbelief, was she really gonna kill her and think that you would date her after killing Ellie?

-

“You and Ellie should come over for dinner this weekend.” Joel said, smiling at you. 

“that would be nice!” you smiled up at him “I could attempt to bake something.” you suggested, scrunching up your face, when you thought about the first time you tried baking and almost burned down the kitchen.

Joel chuckled and patted your shoulder “don't worry about it, I remember the story about the cake.” 

“don’t reming me, that’s kinda embarrassing.” you laughed. “but hey, I can still try, you’re never supposed to give up right?” 

“that’s right, kid.” he smiled at you “alright, well you and Ellie have a nice night yeah?” he said, pulling you into a hug. 

“you too Joel.” you smiled, hugging him back before you pulled away and went over to Ellie’s house.

As you came closer, you heard the sound of glass smashing, startled you ran towards the door, noticing that it was wide open. 

You ran inside, finding Alicia choking Ellie on the floor, both were covered in blood, the room was a mess, broken glass was laying on the floor, along with a broken table. 

Alicia was about pick up a piece of broken glass, presumably to try and kill Ellie but you ran over to her and send a hard kick to her face, knocking her off. Ellie gasped out for air weakly, you pulled her up into a sitting position, noticing all the blood that was running down her cheek from a cut, she looked like she was beginning to fall unconscious.

You turned around quickly when Ellie looked behind you, barely keeping her eyes open, to see Alicia getting up with an angry expression on her face. “y/n..” she mumbled.

Rage filled you at the thought that she tried to kill Ellie, you got up and pulled your backpack off throwing it to the side. 

Alicia looked at you, “you have to understand y/n-

“shut up!” you yelled at her, as you pulled your gun out of your holster and pointed it at her, causing her to gasp at your action, clearly not expecting it. 

She looked like a mad woman, with her long hair in front of her face, blood dripping down from her nose, she looked way worse than Ellie but it didn't matter, she almost killed her.

“you don’t get to come here and touch what’s mine.” you grunted at her, as you put your finger on the trigger.

She clenched her jaw at your words and put her hands into fists “you never gonna love me will you?” 

“you expect me to love you? especially after this?” you scoffed at her, shaking your head.

She let out a grunt before she emerged towards you, startling you. You pulled the trigger, the shot went off but she managed to push your hand away at the last second, dodging the bullet that went straight into the wall. 

She smashed the gun out of your hand and grabbed your shoulders, throwing you against the wall. 

Right when she was about to punch you in the face, you dodged her fist and threw a punch at her instead making her stumble back in pain, you grabbed the glass that was standing on the kitchen counter and smashed it against her face, breaking it in the process. She let out a yelp and touched her face, grunting at the pain. You could feel the broken glass, piercing your skin open but you didn’t care at the moment. 

You started running towards your gun but she recovered already and grabbed your hair, pulling you back, before you could react, she threw a punch at your face and let you fall to the ground. 

“..fuck.” you muttered, crawling away as you saw her walking towards you, you quickly turned around and started to get up but she grabbed you from behind and threw you against the dresser, you tried to catch yourself but it was too late, your head smashed against it, you didn't even register the pain at first but then you felt warm blood running down your face, you could hear a loud ringing in your ears and you began feeling lightheaded, you fell to the side as your vision began to blur. 

You could hear footsteps coming closer to you, you tried to keep your eyes open and to move but you were unable to do anything. 

“this is all your fault y/n.” 

her voice sounded so close and yet so far away as you started to black out. 

the last thing that you heard was a gunshot before you fell unconscious. 

[mavkasilas]

One is coincidence, Two is purpose, Three is destine

*it's my first sick fic!! I always want to write a sick fic or perciver and finally wrote it, so this will be a bit long. Honestly, I think the result is quite good actually hehehe, hope you guys enjoy.

2

<Advice from nan is always wise and right>

“Percy?”

When Oliver hears the coughing getting louder and louder, he gets out of his bed with a concerned look. He knows that boy tries to cover the sound with his thick blanket, it still fails no matter how hard he tried.

“Sorry… did I wake you up?”

“It’s ok, not a biggie.”

He gently sits on Percy’s bed, whispers the Lumos charm from his wand and looks at the boy’s face. Almost as pale as the papers, can’t focus his eyes on his face but still feel sorry about woking him up. What a stupid Percy.

“Do you want me to take you to Madam Pomfrey?”

Oliver places his hand on Percy’s forehead, but he refuses.

“It’s too late… I think I’ll be fine. I got some potions in my cabinet…”

“What do you mean? You feel like a fire dragon egg!”

“I said I’ll be fine…”

Percy slightly scrunches his eyebrows and tilts his head to the side where Oliver places his hand beside his cheek unconsciously. He knows his body temperature is at an unbelievable temperature, but he still thinks he can make it until the dawn arrives.

He feels like his head is going to explode, like a boiling cauldron, but Oliver’s palm makes him feel better. Cold and warm, like the morning breeze, soothes all his pain away.

Oliver looks at Percy’s action. Then, he makes a decision inside of his head.

“Can you move a little bit?”

“What?”

Before Percy could react to Oliver’s words, that big boy has already tucked himself in his bed.

“Ollie? what are you doing?”

“Since you don’t wanna bother Madam Pomfrey that much, I’ll be taking care of you from now on.”

Percy doesn’t know why he got the urge to laugh even though he feels very sick. Instead of laughing, another bunch of coughing sounds come out from his throat.

“Easy, easy.”

Oliver got scared by Percy’s coughing. It just feels like he’s gonna cough his brain out from his mouth. He gently pats on Percy’s chest and wipes off some sweats from his face.

“I’m gonna infect you, Ollie…”

“A  good quidditch player can’t easily get beaten off by a cold, don’t you know?”

“You’re gonna be very sick… when you woke up…”

Percy gives Oliver a weak smile. It’s weird, for a second he really feels very sick and nauseous, but then when Oliver comes near to him, everything is fine again. Looks like he doesn’t even need the potions that he stores in his cabinet.

Oliver feels Percy starting to shiver a little bit. He looks like a poor stray cat that got abandoned on the street.

“Do you need me to get your jumper?”

“It’s fine…”

Percy grabbed Oliver’s hand before letting him step out from the bed. At the moment, he doesn’t even know what is he doing, but all he can think is he doesn’t want him leaving him.

He murmured something, Oliver couldn’t listen clearly so he leaned down.

“stay…”

Oliver smirked.

“This time you’re getting more clingy than previous, Perce.”

He whispers, then held the sick boy in his arms so that he can warm him up with his body temperature. It’s just like the little fever has woken up Percy’s nature, he automatically wraps his hands on Oliver’s waist and buried his face into his chest.

“Am I your pillow?”

“Be quiet, Hermes…. I’ll give...give you a mice’s tail…….”

Oliver feels offended by the words coming out of Percy, but since he’s the patient he’ll forgive him. He found Percy only being clingy and a softie whenever he’s sick. He drops all his disguise, shows his true colour to Oliver and he really likes it very much.

It becomes a secret between them.

“Sleep well, my boy.”

Oliver dropped a kiss on Percy’s forehead, gently like a petal of a flower.

The next day morning,

“Ollie? Ollie, wake up.”

“What… we don’t have class today……”

Percy’s hoarse voice wakes Oliver up, but even though he’s sleepy, urge to go back for his sleep, he still reached Percy’s head just to check whether the heat goes down or not.

“Yes, we do not have class today but you got to practice this morning.”

Finally, Oliver opens his eyes.

He thought for a while, then continue holding Percy tightly in his arms. No matter how hard Percy tries to break free of the embrace, he fails. Now Percy is totally sober, he can’t believe he slept in Oliver’s arms for the whole night.

And to be honest, he feels great.

“It’s just a practice, Perce... Like you always said, maybe I should take a day off.”

“You’re quitting your practice? That’s fresh.”

“Nothing fresher than you, clingy kitten…”

“Shut up!”

Percy blushed and throws a pillow on Oliver.

He doesn’t remember what actually had happened last night, all he can remember is some pieces blurry memories of Oliver comforting him.

“Seriously? After all the good times we had, this is how you treat me?”

Oliver gets up from the bed and catches the pillows in his face. Then, he feels a bit itchy in his throat, he couldn’t keep it but just cough it out.

“See? I told you! You gonna get sick because of me.”

"It’s just an itch, I wrapped you like a cocoon with your blanket, probably that’s the reason got caught a bit cold. Not because of your germs."

Oliver scrunches his nose. He stops Percy who tries to get off the bed.

“Stay here. You’re not going to leave the bed until I take you to Madam Pomfrey.”

“I’m good now!”

“No, you’re not. I can tell your head is still as heavy as Snape has poured a full cauldron of lead into your head.”

He jumps off the bed and tucks himself into his Puddlemere jumper.

“Why are you doing this?”

“What?”

“Taking care of me, and…...the cuddling.”

“Don’t you like it? I thought you like it, and it works every time isn’t it?”

Oliver can’t tell the red on Percy’s cheek whether is a blush or just simply because of the fever.

“Well…Even my mom has never done this to me.”

“Cuddling is the best healing potion in the world.”

“Pardon?”

Percy looks at Oliver with a question face.

“A wise words come from the greatest woman.”

“Nonsense. I never heard that before, which famous potion maker says that?”

“My nan. That’s how she did it to me whenever I’m sick.”

Seems like Oliver got a nice flashback of memories. He gives out a warm smile while walking towards Percy.

“It’s ok to lean on me. You know I’ll always be here for you, Perce.”

The whisper beside his ear from Oliver makes Percy feel like he’s sinking in a bed of cotton. He leans his head on his shoulder. They are always that wide and strong, as it’s tailor-made for him to bear all the burden on him.

Percy feels something soft, likes a drop of raindrop fell on his head.

This is the second time he comforts him with the kiss. The first is at midnight, the second is now.

If not because of the headache and the classes, Percy actually doesn’t mind getting sick every day.