#and through these very hard times this novel is what keeping me sane honestly

[liberxi]

Since someone on AO3 asked for writing advice for beginners, I thought I’d note down some things I find useful for my own writing here, in case someone else might find them helpful, too. I always feel a bit pretentious offering advice like I actually know what I’m doing, and this list is by no means complete and it obviously doesn’t apply to every kind of story equally. But if you want to check it out, you find another completely sane post of normal length underneath the cut.

First some general stuff, that I cannot emphasis enough:

Write

This sounds stupid, but as with every other skill, you will get better with practice. Just do it. Don’t give up. Don’t save that idea. You can always go back and fix it later. Or come up with an even better idea for your next project. Truth it, your style will always keep evolving. I look back on some of my works and manage to feel quite pleased, but with other stories I feel like I would have written them very differently even just six months later. You’ll figure out what works for you once you actually do it.

Finish

Make sure to finish stuff, especially if you are just starting out. You don’t have to finish every idea you ever start, but if you never finish anything, you will only get frustrated. Set yourself attainable goals. Don’t start with the amazing novel idea you have, but try to get into a habit of writing with shorter pieces. I promise, finishing stuff feels good and it will motivate you to keep going.

Read

Honestly, the most important thing for any writer is reading in my opinion. You’ll learn so much just by observing other people do it, especially if they do it well. (Don’t be scared to pick up that literary fiction novel, it will be worth it!) Try to read consciously. Think about what works for you and what doesn’t, and why that is the case. Other media with narrative structure works as well. Try to figure out why the emotional arc in your favourite TV show hits so hard! Also, read other people’s opinions. Some people out there have shockingly smart takes, and even if you disagree with someone, it might help to figure out why you disagree with them. Just observe what other people are doing and how they are doing it.

Basics

Writing is a creative activity, but it still has technical rules that you can learn to follow. Just basic stuff like sticking to your chosen perspective or keeping the right tense is grunt work that everyone is able to get right if they pay attention to it. The good news is that this stuff becomes easier if you just keep reading and writing, and it will become an automatism soon enough. (Of course you can also break those rules or bend them, but you should understand them first to do it consciously!)

Have fun

I know some people will tell you to build a habit out of writing and if you can, that’s great! But from experience, I also know that it will just suck the joy out of it if you try to force your way through a creative block. If you feel like you’re running dry, take a step back and look for inspiration. Check out new places or new art, and maybe step out of your comfort zone. Usually, feeling stuck is the perfect time to listen to that band your friend recommended to you months ago, but that you still didn’t check out, because you hate new things. Or watch that TV show that was popular five years ago, which looked good but where the hype around it turned you off. Write what is fun to you and when it’s fun to you. If it becomes a chore, you will just want to give up on it altogether.

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But let’s say you know all of that already and actually want to get started, but you’re struggling to figure out your plot:

Know where you are going

This advice does definitely not apply to everyone, but it does help me. I remember that when I was a child, my parents took me to a reading by Eoin Colfer, whose books I really liked in elementary school. And he gave this advice to aspiring writers – you don’t have to know how to get there in detail yet, but you should know how your story ends. And years later, when I picked up writing myself, I stuck to that and it works for me quite well. If you know how you want your story to end, it will become a lot easier to determine which plot beats will be necessary to get you there.

Let your character grow

Your character should undergo some kind of internal change throughout the story. That is highly linked to the character’s motivation. I always think of Kurt Vonnegut’s quote: “Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.” Every character should have a goal motivating their actions throughout the story and it doesn’t have to be a big one either. Ideally, their internal progress should be linked to that goal. That doesn’t mean it has to be solved by the end of your story. For example, your character could hate their job, making it their main goal to get out of it. They could now experience something to become aware of that desire or something that changes their mind about it. The story could end with them dramatically quitting their job. It could also just end with them opening a new tap in their browser to finally look for alternative job offers. It could also end on a depressing note where they come to terms with the fact that they need to keep their job, because a large bill arrives. In that case, their change of mind would be one towards resignation, but their stance on the situation would still have changed. Or they could realise that their job isn’t the problem, but their private life is and they finally gather the courage to call back their date from last week, in that case the change would be in their goals themselves. Especially if you are writing romance, it can be helpful to give your character a motivation outside of the relationship to make them feel more fleshed out. If you take the time to figure out what your character wants and what kind of development you want them to undergo, it will become much easier to decide where the plot is supposed to go.

Base your conflict on your character’s personality

Aristoteles already said that consequences hit much harder for the audience, if the character has brought them upon themself. In other words, the conflict should not be something that’s out of the character’s hands; instead, it should feel avoidable. So for example, don’t interrupt the love confession by another person entering the scene. You can do that, but it’s lazy and will not feel as satisfying. Instead, avoid the confession, because your character is deeply insecure, is scared of rejection due to past experiences, etc. That way, it will feel more satisfying when the situation is finally resolved and it can be a direct result of the character changing internally as explained above. That means, you should figure out what your character wants, but also what their weaknesses are or what might trigger them. If you figure that out first, it will be easier to decide what the conflict of your story should be, aka what the actual premise is.

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Now you’ve figured out what’s supposed happen in your story and you finally get to writing. Some things that are useful to keep in mind:

Be aware of everyone’s motivations

This sounds very much like the point above, but I was mainly referring to your protagonist there. You should also be aware of what your other characters (at least the main ones) want and what they are feeling during the scenes, so you will be able to write their actions believably. Even if your protagonist hasn’t figured them out (yet), your readers should be able to understand them, and in order to achieve that, you need to know what they are supposed to understand. If you are not practiced at that yet, it might be helpful to write scenes or parts of scenes from another perspective first, so you are able to explicitly write down thoughts and emotions. Even if it doesn’t end up being part of the story, it can be good practice to figure out your character and it will help with describing them from the outside, too. So, whenever you write, be aware of all the characters’ internal workings, even if you don’t get to name them explicitly. It will make them more believable and your story more consistent.

Visualise the scene

Try to have a mental image of the scene you are writing. It doesn’t mean you have to visualise every detail of the setting. But I’m always thinking about this anecdote I heard about Vladimir Nabokov, who once mentioned that in one of his early short stories, a character tosses a match (or maybe a cigarette?) into an empty glass. But several pages later, the characters refill their glasses and drink from them. Apparently, this kind of mistake didn’t happen to him in later years as he became more practiced at visualising a scene. Because if you visualise it, you will remember that there’s something in that glass and won’t let your character drink from it. I do think this is something that does become easier with practice, and that is the reason why actually writing is such an essential part of improving. If you can picture the scene, it will be more coherent. If you are aware of the character’s surroundings - for example the clothes you described, how you described their surroundings, or that you gave them a hot coffee mug to hold - it will become easier to know what the characters would be seeing, smelling, hearing, etc. at the moment. That allows you to put in descriptions that will make the scene more vivid. They are holding a hot mug? It will become uncomfortable against their palm eventually and they will need to switch hands. They are sitting at a café close to a train station? Noise from the trains might interrupt their conversation. It doesn’t just help with authenticity, but also ensures that your writing won’t sound like a simple list of actions. It also helps with pacing your story, if you can adjust it through giving descriptions, or leaving them out if you need to create a sense of urgency. If you can see it in your mind’s eye, you can write it!

Show, don’t tell

This one is very basic and you’ve definitely heard this advice before, but it’s still worth mentioning. Don’t just mention that your character is nervous. Let them scratch their face. Let them get sweaty palms. Don’t tell me someone is playful and annoying, include a scene where they prank someone, etc. It sounds simple, but I for one do struggle with spelling out things too explicitly, because I’m worried the readers might not understand it otherwise. If you catch yourself just stating things about characters though, it might be worth taking a step back to ask yourself – what would an example of that kind of quality or behaviour be? And then actually write that into your story.

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And remember: developing your writing skill and personal style is a progress that’s never over. You’re always allowed to change and grow and that is beautiful! Don’t pressure yourself with expectations, just get started, allow yourself to be silly with it and – HAVE FUN!

[thisismyaha]

gigantic genshin rant, genshin enjoyers please ignore. this is for my own cathartism

i liked genshin like genuinely. like i was one of those losers who played when it first launched, gave up because i didn’t like the flat writing then came back into it because i dunno something but then i got super into it and then i spiraled and became genuinely addicted and obsessive over it because it was literally the only thing keeping me semi-sane during the pandemic and also because lumine is the love of my life and goddess of light, my moon and starlight and i simped so hard for her but god genshin kinda really fucking sucks.

i mean this as sincerely and unharshly as possible but the story is really really bad. the themes and the pacing and the way its written is just so messy.

the game expects you to play the main story and then mid-way randomly go on dates or do character stories. like every archon arc has this one part where everything, the build up, the tension, the plot thickening moment just stops and genshin goes ‘okay now time to go on dates with these limited time characters so you can form a bond with them and give us money to pull for them’ and ughughguh it wouldn’t be too bad but most of the time the character stories are just shallow marketing.

i remember playing ayaka’s story quest and when the story went ‘she doesn’t have any friends’, i pulled up short and was like then wtf is ‘thoma?’ and then cried when thats never ever addressed and she just becomes a demure ojousama character and almost nothing else

like genuinely the character story i like the most is still zhongli’s pt 1 and 2 and that was three years ago.

like the characters have backstories, some with really really interesting backstories. why can’t we just explore those???? why do we have to go on another bland date for the billionth time instead of just seeing a nicely animated scene or heck even just a VN style version of the character’s already written up stories.

oh another bad habit of genshin: themes and plots are just dropped left and right or rushed through in one arc and then never brought up again. like the whole inazuma story arc. also again characters randomly coming up for one scene and then never appearing again because their marketing period is over. again inazuma story arc. god inazuma story arc was just so bad.

over utilisation of npc characters who do not have unique models and bland personalities. like how many greedy merchants are we going to have to sit through? or generic fatui bad guy aklsj crycrycyr

the way its formed as a gacha game (especially one where there is no option to replay events and the main story) with a set release schedule really fucks up any pacing it could potentially have. but also the bloated cast is already cracking under its own weight as some characters a very loved and you can see the care and effort that went into their story, their design, their repeated appearance in the narrative and in everything but then others are just one and done. the way a gacha game’s priority is profit and releasing new characters every so often just means this reality but its so sad and frustrating with the potential loss.

even just reading the story is annoying because of the visual novel aspects combined with the 3d cutscenes make it hard to keep an enjoyable flow. I like reading, i don’t mind skipping some animation or voicelines if i can just keep reading but because of the game forcing you to observe these mini cutscenes, its annoying and choppy as my eyes glaze over and i just wait for a character to cycle through one of four stock animations. seriously character animations are so limited i don’t understand why i have to sit through one more scene of someone crossing their arms. like i understand what they want to do but honestly ive had way mor enjoyment reading static image VNs

paimon keeps repeating entire dialogue scenes to the player as if we’re babies who need someone to summarise what literally just happened on screen. like add a fucking history tab or something please if you won’t even add a skip button. like the whole argument about not adding a skip button is because its all about the story but i’m really truly sorry but the story itself sucks. the dialogue is long winded and sometimes i can literally feel as if the writer had been forced to meet a quota and its just- its just frustrating.

[amelylinaa]

WIP

Hello everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful start of the year, wishing you all the best and most stable year, because honestly after all the horrible hectic stuff happening in the last year I feel like we all need some rest with a stable calm year.

I'm slowly but surely working on this month's wips, so don't worry they will come, but probably a little bit later than usually.

Right now 2 problems are making it hard for me to create stuff.

First is the weather and temperature change in my home town. For about 2 weeks now we are having abnormally cold winter, and my family's house is not prepared for it whatsoever , im typing with gloves on right now, thats just how cold it gets. So every time I sit near my PC i get cold to the very bones wich sucks, but let's just call it a fun experience of what will come faster : my suibstance painter textures or my fingers fall off haha

Second more severe problem is that my PTSD that I recently got diagnosed (and still cant wrap my head around me having c-ptsd) gets the worst out of me and my mental health is really at it's lowest. Tried to escape into making cc, but you can guess that first problem makes it difficult.

So yeah, just wanted to share I guess. Love you all so much, I know that I'm not that active especially with posting such personal posts, but i just genuinely want to thank all of you for the support I got from you through the years. I'm looking through all the nice words you ever said to me and this makes my mental struggles not that painful <3

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart!

p.s. this might be one very interesting black/white coat from a very interesting novel that i've read recently hehe

[teeth-and-tea]

ANIME & MANGA I HAVE BINGED IN THE LAST MONTH: May 2021

I've Been Hunting Slimes for the Past 300 Years and Now Ive Maxed Out My Level: incredibly long name aside, cute af slice of life that suffers Same Face Syndrome. I'm still happy to watch it because of how feel good and fluffy it is though, Im probably gonna forget about it in two or three years tho. 8/10.

Don't Toy With Me, Miss Nagatoro: I found out this was a webcomic first and suddenly all the HORNINESS made so much more sense. A Femdom, Degradation, Humiliation, Dacryphilia Bullies to Lovers story disguised as a high school rom-com which, I'm not going to lie, misses SKEEVY CITY by mere inches on a regular basis. However, I'm a Dom/Switch and this entire relationship sets off my dom brain center like New York City just shy of midnight. So if you're into that sort of scene, this anime is for you. If not, it's still fascinating but you're probably gonna be a little put off by how mean the Girl!Bully is to the guy MC. Unless you find out something about yourself, in which case, congrats! Stay safe, sane, consensual, and learn about the traffic light system on top of safe words, I promise you'll have a better life in general after that. Still Ongoing, currently 10/10.

Fruits Basket: IM GONNA CRY I LOVE THIS ANIME SO MUCH???? The original anime came out when I was in... I think middle school and my parents were really strict on what I watched so I never got to experience the first wave and I never bothered to watch the show ever after I moved out of the house years later. However, now that I'm much older I honestly can say this is one of my favorite anime to date, and all the characters are charming, lovable, with their own problems that I can connect to or sympathize with, and I love the MC which is always a treat tbh. Except Akito. Akito can suck a sandpaper dick. I'm only on S2 tho so no spoilers! Anime 11/10.

Monster Girl Doctor: went in thinking it was gonna be a monster girl who's a doctor with a homoerotic assistant (her name is SAPPHY okay sue me for thinking it) and ended up watching the entire dubbed harem series. Honestly, I've seen worse and this one has consistent follow-through on interesting characters and backstory enough for me to shove aside the blatant under-monstrousness of the female monsters and the harem-ness of everything else. Dubbing is honestly really good, which is a treat, and the monster designs are not the worst and the MC is tolerable. Honestly, I don't mind having watched it! The mix of cgi and the traditional animation together work pretty strangely though, and it often doesn't flow super well. 7.5/10

So I'm a Spider, So What: Dubbed version which honestly isn't that bad. Took me a bit to get into it, but after realizing that it's got a mismatched timeline a la The Witcher, it made so much more sense. Heavily done in cgi, and you can definitely tell between the 2D and 3D animations, but not the worst in the world. I went in not expecting much but it ended up being an Issekai I can stand and even enjoy. On god has a decent story... with the spider. I'd be a liar if I didnt say I skipped some of the human parts just to get back to the best part of the show. 8/10.

Somali and the Forest Spirit: I'm so fucking nostalgic for this thing it makes me want to go and hug my dad. About a human girl under threat of being eaten with a monster-dominated world. Very obvious "humans fear what they don't understand" message but instead of the humans learning tolerance it's what happens when they get annihilated first so like, kudos for the mangaka for having the guts to do that. I cried like a baby regularly. It's really good, I watched the dub and ID WATCH IT AGAIN!!! 9/10.

To Your Eternity: Oh my god. O h my g o d. Fell in love on the first episode, ngl. About if an immortal being learned how to be a person from scratch. I love it. HOWEVER. Keep a box of tissues on you at all times because you're gonna need them. I'm only on EP7 because that's all that's out right now but just know. I love it. Not for everyone but certainly for my "what do we define as human and the human condition" ass. 12/10.

Those Snow White Notes: A sports anime without any sports. About shamisen playing which is cool because I never realized how cool this instrument was??? Its neat af. OP1&2 are by Burnout Syndrom so know theyre fire. Gonna be real, its pretty alright, but not extraordinary. You can tell they were using the characters as archetypes rather than actually characters which kinda kills a lot of the emotional value you could've had, but I'm still gonna watch it. It doesn't make me cringe as hard as other sports anime tho so I consider it toptier in that regards but if you're a big sports anime fan you might be bummed out by it. Every single musical performance is INCREDIBLE tho. A solid 8/10.

Toilet Bound Hanako-kun: THE ART OMFG IT'S SO GORGEOUS. Listen, if you took coptic markers and gave them an animation budget with some manga panel direction thrown in there, that's this anime. It's beautiful. Gorgeous. I'm in love with the aesthetic every second. Story? Really good. Characters? I love the MC and his evil little twin brother asshat. Demons? Not super imaginative but I'm carrying on happy as can be anyways. Dubbing? A bit shaky at times but I found the voices charming if a little off for some of them. I'm already waiting for the second season with popcorn at the ready. 10/10.

Prison School: I watched this directly after Hanako-kun and it was like I got slapped in the face by sweaty unwashed titties and some fedora wearing schmuck's piss kink. No character is likable or redeemable. I finished it, but at what cost? 2/10 and only because a character shit his pants and I laughed.

Sleepy Princess in the Demon Castle: watched this right after Prison School and it was NECESSARY tbh. Its so CUTE and honestly, im not even kidding you, the fucking funniest anime I've seen in months. I watched the dub and the VAs are having the time of their lives working on this anime not just giving it their all but literally just going ham. Its great. If I read this im sure id be bored outta my mind but the VAs giving it a joyous performance make it an insta fave for me tbh. 9/10.

Sk8 the Infinity: i watched the dub with my bro and I can confirm that its a spectacular show because we both loved it and we have vastly different tastes. Incredibly SUSPENSFUL AND STRESSFUL for an anime about skateboarding but we finished it in a single sitting tbh. The last episode is not dubbed for some reason but we still loved it. Like if Free! was less obnoxious but the only fan-service here is Joe ♡ a beefcake who owns my lesbian heart. I think there's exactly one named female character tho and I legit couldn't tell you what it was if there was a gun to my head. So, over all, 9.5/10.

That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime: I'm going to be entirely honest, I went in thinking it was going to be a boring isekai of no value. I was right about the Isekai part. It was honestly pretty interesting and focused on nation building like you're playing civilization rather than the usual "Get Stronger" narrative or "Get Some Pussy" narrative most isekais take which is delightfully refreshing. Granted there are flavors of that in this which means it doesn't alienate the big isekai watchers out there, but it's not the whole dish and it doesn't make me want to cringe the same way others do. You've got a slime MC just vibing and building a nation of monsters nbd. Does lose points for making the female monsters more humanoid than their male counterparts but makes them back by only doing perfunctory fan-service and nothing that makes me want to cry... except the butt sumo episode but in fairness it was all a terrible dream. Literally, the MC refuses to dream anymore after that. solid animation, decent voice acting, decent story, made me realize how HUGE this is in the Light Novel community???? There's like 18 fucking novels and that's WILD. 8.5/10.

MANGA:

Spirit Photographer Saburo Kono: a one shot special by the mangaka of The Promised Neverland! Honestly a really delicate touch of both super creepy and really touching, and I'm not gonna lie I'm bummed that this isn't a bigger project but the single chapter makes it a good taste for their style. I've been wondering if I wanna read/watch The Promised Neverland and now I think I will. 10/10

Deranged Detective Ron Kamonohashi: from the mangaka of Hitman Reborn comes this Sherlock and Watson derivative! Not even 20 chapters out yet with a sort of spotty schedule, I honestly love it even thought it's exactly as you expect. HOWEVER. Kamonohashi the "Sherlock" character uses mental pressure to kill all confirmed murderers and it's up to Toto the "Watson" character to save all those people before Kamonohashi kills them! It's just recently introduced a "Moriarty" family of crime lords (not a big spoiler don't worry it was obvious) so the tension surrounding Ron's past is amping up rn. Personally, I think the art is GORGEOUS, the characters engaging, and the story quick enough to keep my interest. Most mysteries are solved within a chapter or two so you're not stuck 20 chapters into one locked room mystery which is just peachy tbh. RN, 10/10. If this gets an anime, I anticipate a legion of fangirls who ship the two main characters along with their many friends. I've been alive too long to believe otherwise.

Don't Toy with Me, Miss Nagatoro: Yeah I read the manga after I watched the show. A slower build than the anime, but it works for the format, if theyd done the same with the show then I don't think it wouldve done as well. Honestly? Cuter tbh but just as horny. You dont start really LEARNING about your character until like, chap 65 tho and no real "drama" happens until like 75. A good chunk of the chapters are like 8pgs so its a breeze to get through. I love these slow burn idiots of the century. 9.5/10 because you can DEFINITELY tell the mangaka does hentai too.

Yugen's All-Ghouls Homeroom: one-shot by the mangaka for Food Wars, it's no wonder there's this constant perviness from the MC, a guy who can see and exorcise spirits. Takes place at an all girl's finishing school with KICK ASS monsters tbh, kinda bummed its not longer. The MC? Blatant monsterfucker who is also a CONFRIMED monsterfucker???? Idk i vibe with that single emotion. Everything else is hit or miss. 7/10 for monsters and cool concept, lost points for the MC very pointedly being okay with admitting he'd wait for the teenagers to be adults tho. Creepy af. Could live without that.

Hell's Paradise: I finished the entire 127chps in 3 days and I was really enthusiastic about it 90% of the time thinking about how deep it was and then I actually thought about it and I ended up being very neutral about the whole thing tbh. The art is fantastic tho, but DEFINITELY deserving of the M rating. Tits. Tits everywhere. But not tits to be ecchi over, no, monster hermit tits on beautiful women-ish figures. Now generally I give that a pass but a huge theme in the story is that men and women are "no better than one or the other" but like, lady tits are what you see 99% of the time. Men tits are few and far between. I call bullshit on most of the "deep" themes is what I'm saying, so it's like the mangaka was trying for those deep thoughts but missed the margin a little too far for my preference. That being said, the MC is a married man who loves his wife which automatically makes him my favorite character so like... idk so many good things, so many misses, but overall really spectacular themes and imagery. Unique but classic all at once. It's getting an anime and I have NO IDEA how much censorship they're gonna be doing but they're going to be doing SO MUCH. Oh yeah, and one guy is a plant/human hybrid who fucks a 1000 year old plant-hermit which makes him a canon monster fucker. And one canon non-binary character who I, a nonbinary, actually like. So like... gosh I've got mixed feelings. 8.5/10.

Choujin X: From Sui Ishida, mangaka to the mega hit Tokyo Ghoul comes this brand new manga!... Of one chapter, lol. Not really binge-y because it's just the one chapter out right now but I'm already keeping my eye on it. The grasp on anatomy in the art is PHENOMENAL and you can see Ishida flexing his art skill which is great. Can't give a true rating but I'm giving it a tentative 9/10 because I'm excited to see more.

Shag&Scoob: technically not a manga, its an ongoing webcomic I binged an subscribed to in one day and I just think it deserves more attention. Starts off funny with "what if Scooby Doo had a gun" and has been led to "what if all cartoons are aliens that survive and receive their powers by the humans that love them in an epic war with Martians." On god, its good. I finished the current series in a couple hours so it's a breezy read, highly recommend it. 9/10.

To Your Eternity: Yeah I watched the anime and then finished all current 143 chapters in like 3 days. GOD IM WEAK. I don't buy physical manga unless I know I want to remember the story forever and I'm already budgeting for the current books out. Yeah, this is a good series. That being said, definitely not for the faint of heart or those who suffer under common triggers like suicide, molestation, death, etc. It's all framed as bad and necessary to the story don't get me wrong, but it's there and has lasting affects on the characters. Incredible story telling by the creator of A Silent Voice. Keep tissues nearby at all times. 12/10.

[seoraksan]

hello! i hope ur having the best n most magical day <3

oh my gosh, hi! how’re you? i already know who this is just by the way you’re writing. hi tokki!! my magical friend❤️ i’ve missed you so very much! i’m sorry that i haven’t been talking to you or answering your messages. i went through a rough patch a few years ago, and i still haven’t completely gone back to my old social self. i have messages that i haven’t answered in 3 years and i feel so bad about it..

i have the habit of going silent when i’m going through a hard time. i don’t like throwing my emotions onto other people when i’m sad. so that’s one of the reasons why i haven’t been doing good when it comes to talking to people, and trying to be active on social media. i never want to be the reason for someone’s bad day.

you’ve always been on my mind, but i’ve been constantly thinking of you these past few weeks. i tried to find you on kakaotalk a while back, but i couldn’t log into my old account. i ended up messaging you on snapchat, and i was hoping that you still used it, even though i know you haven’t posted in a while. i didn’t want to lose contact with you, you mean too much to me. it’s so crazy how fate is! i’m so happy that you reached out, i thought i lost you❤️ i really appreciate you more then words can ever say. you’ve always been a very treasured person in my life. i’m beyond grateful for the fact that you still think of me, even when i’ve been terrible at communicating.

i know people probably look at the changes in my blog and think that i no longer love those 7 beautiful angels, but that’s not true. i’ve never stopped loving and supporting bts. actually, my love for them has only grown stronger over the years. i had to back away from the fandom because it wasn’t the best for my mental health. there were a lot of controlling people on here that started showing their true colors, and i had to take a step back. i saw so much of,” he’s mine’ or “he needs to do this with his body” so many people were starting to post really personal things about them. photographs that shouldn’t have been posted anywhere, privacy invasion, etc. i started to see people talking about the new houses they were buying, what district the homes are in, and even going as far as telling the address. it was crazy stuff that was making me feel uncomfortable. they are humans and they deserve privacy and respect. even if you know where they live, you shouldn’t be waving it around, because there are a lot of people out there that might want to do them harm, and if you love them, you should always want them to be protected. i can’t even imagine something bad like that happening to them. it makes my heart hurt with even the thought. and then you had the people who felt like they owned them just because they bought some albums and merchandise. ‘fans’ always being so concerned about their personal lives and what they were doing with their time. it became really gross. just because you gave every dollar in your back account to purchase their merch and see them live, that does not mean that you have claim on them. people couldn’t comprehend it. and this was doing a time when i would follow mostly bts blogs, so i would see it quite constantly. not everyone was like that, but it was hard to find the good apples when you’re digging in a barrel of a lot of bad ones. it was difficult to sit back and not say anything, so i would try and speak up as much as possible. i saw a few bigger blogs showing this behavior, and it scared me because they have a bigger platform to spew such things out to a willing audience that sometimes seemed really naive and would listen to anything these blogs were posting. when i would try and talk to them about the way that they were acting, they got defensive and tried to act like what they were doing was okay, and that it shouldn’t bother me that much because, “they’re public figures and they should be used to such treatment” it was just too stressful, so i bowed out of the fandom on tumblr. i still showed my love and support for bts, but i couldn’t do the fandom. i couldn’t argue with people all day long about the way that they were acting. especially at a time when i was already stressed and miserable. i know a lot of ex army would talk about how some people in the fandom made them stop being as active with bts, and in the end they stopped caring for them. i wasn’t going to allow people to take away the love and joy that i feel towards bts, so i had to make the decision to stop being as active on tumblr.

i love army so much. they’re so dedicated to the boys, and it’s a beautiful thing. army is kind, supportive of others, and compassionate. they respect boundaries. army knows that to love bts, you have to respect them. how can you say you love them if you aren’t respecting them? it doesn’t matter if you’ve been a fan for 8 years or 8 minutes, it’s all about the love and respect that you have for them. it’s about love, not about the merch, or how many of their concerts you’ve been to, it’s about love.

the boys have been one of the few things that i’ve had to keep me sane these past few years. so much has happened, and if it wasn’t for them and the love i feel for them, i don’t really think i could’ve made it. even when it came to simple things like finding the motivation to get out of bed, all i had to do was scroll through twitter and see them, and i would feel so much happiness. times when i felt like i didn’t have much to wake up for anymore, they were there to make me smile and feel loved. i get strength just knowing that they’re alive and well.

but i do really miss gushing about the boys, so i might make another blog. i’ve been saying that for a while, but i might actually do it. talking about them brings me such happiness, and i miss being apart of the community 🖤

only downside to leaving was that i missed out on a lot of my friends. like you, meariie, S(@seokjinshearts ), and a few others who hold a special place in my heart. i feel so terrible because i feel like i’ve neglected our friendship and let it wither by not feeding it. but please know that i’ve never once ceased to pour my love into it. i’ve always cared for our friendship and held it close to my heart. i wish i could’ve shown it more to you. i hope that there’s still time to make it up to you. to show you how much you mean to me, because you really are one of the best people to ever step foot into my life, and it would devastate me to see you walk away. i will try harder, i promise.

i pray that you’re doing well and staying safe!! i believe the last time we talked was before the pandemic. are you doing well? staying safe? drinking water and eating? have you been resting? and taking time for yourself? all the important things that i hope that you’ve been doing since the last time we’ve had a chance to talk. how’s your family? is everyone well? are you doing good mentally? there’s so much to catch up on🥺

i’m sorry for the novel that i just wrote. it’s hard for me to write in small paragraphs when i have so much in my heart that i want to get out. honestly, i could keep going on, but i don’t want you to have to sit here reading it for 3 hours. my inbox is always open, and if you want to talk on another social website, like kakaotalk or whatever, i’m so willing to do that. i want to have you in my life, tokki. my world is much more magnificent with you in it ❤️ my adoration for you goes beyond words, my magical friend. i hope that we can allow our friendship to blossom again and touch the heavens with its blooms.

sending you a basket full of love and adoration, always🥰

@tick-tokki

[hanramm156]

Rammstein Family Game: Get to know me! (Warning: a long ramble)

I’m honored to be tagged by @cherrisplace​ and @momoredcrow​. ^^ It’s been a pleasure to read other people’s Rammstein memories and opinions, so here comes mine as well. Writing is one of those rare things that keep me sane during this crazy season, so I apologize this being super long. More rambling is probably coming when everything’s cancelled and I have nothing else to do.

Rules: There are no rules. Tag whoever you want. Don’t tag yourself. Tag yourself. You don’t have to answer all the questions. Do what you please. Have fun.

Created by: @vapor-stein

1. I’m curious: when did you discover Rammstein?

2004 properly, but I might have heard Du hast or other popular songs even earlier.

2. Tell me your story. How did you discover them?

As said, it was 2004 and I was watching some random Finnish music show. Back in the days, I watched a lot of music videos from the tv and recorded my favorite ones to VHS. One evening Rammstein’s Amerika came from the show and I was like “??? What on earth is this??? Sounds interesting…”. I wasn’t into metal music back then (I mostly listened to indiepop and alternative rock), but for whatever reason, I got hooked instantly to this German band’s dark, eerie sound. It was refreshing to hear something else than English and the video was also thrilling.

Rammstein had intruded my mind already, but the final straw was when I saw the Mein Teil video. I liked both the song and the video A LOT - so much that I even felt kinda “dirty” for liking something this dark. A 14-year-old me was constantly asking from myself that: “am I even allowed to like this kind of stuff this much?”. The backstory for the song was creepy, but so mesmerizing – like I had been introduced to the darkest corners of human mind: yes, this kind of stuff happens, and we shouldn’t close our eyes from it. So next, the only thing I could do was to buy Reise, reise album, listen to it on loop and sketch my German notebook full of Rammstein lyrics. Here’s a proof:

I have so many stories about my relationship to Rammstein that I might have to write them all down now when there’s a lot of time.

3. Favourite song?

This topic would be worth a novel itself, but here are some of my favorites:

Asche zu Asche – So badass, gives me such an energy every time – plus, not to forget the burning microphones and SILVER REESH!

Bück dich – Yes, it’s a horrible story once again in this song, but I can’t help but to admit that the song is freaking catchy and in a weird way, hot. Also, there’s a funny backstory when I was in 9th grade and we almost performed this song in our official graduation party with my boyfriend and a bunch of our friends (maybe good that the idea was abandoned in the end…). We had a vague clue what the song was about, but we just thought it was funny – also, our German teacher dressed always in leather and loved Rammstein (she played us Bestrafe mich during one class and I’ll always remember the awkward atmosphere) so we were thinking to dedicate the song to her for as our goodbye. XDD Seriously, why I have been so weird for all my life…

Sehnsucht – In most of the pop songs, longing is described by tender words and soft lyrics, but not in Rammstein’s case. I’ve had this weird feeling of “longing” all my life that I can’t describe properly. It’s kind of an inner emptiness, only arts and music can help to deal with it when it hits. I think Sehnsucht describes so realistically what is longing about in reality: it’s this angry pressure in your heart which you want to get out of your chest but can’t. In the end, you just want to scream your lungs out.

Mein Herz brennt – Powerful song that always gives me goosebumps. I can’t even explain why. Maybe the fact that “tough” men being emotional is my soft spot and Rammstein hits that spot hard.

Links 2-3-4 – I have always been kind of a rebel and I feel like when everyone else is going to the “right” I have to go to the left, to the unknown. My heart is longing for adventure, for the paths the others are not going. I dunno, but this is such a powerful song for me. When I hear it, I always just want to jump around. In Tampere concert I went totally nuts when Links started as the second song, lol. From that moment I felt like I was back home with my boys.

Mein Teil – No need for further explanations anymore.

Los – The harmonica solo!!! The dropped c tuning and the acoustic sounds!! I love it.

Amour – My favorite R+ ballad. I confess that I listen to this and think about the lyrics when I’m in the mood for writing something painfully romantic.

Weit weg – There’s this painful longing once again that always resonates to me. I listened this to a lot after the “after blues” of Ratina concert.

Tattoo – A song that I didn’t care about so much at first, but for whatever reason, it’s almost my favorite from the new album nowadays. It’s catchy as hell and I like the “rattling” guitar riffs.

4. Least favourite song? Come on. I know you have one.

Feuer frei – Too much Vin Diesel vibes. I also get a picture of drunken, middle-aged Finnish guys on a R+ gig who don’t care about to band, but just want to have a party of their life and get drunk, far away from their wives. (No offense to anyone, but as music is almost like a religion to me, I can’t help but to have a bit of disrespect for kind of people who just “consume” music.)

Pussy – Both musically and lyrically, so bad, but I get the point the guys tried to give with this nonsense.

5. Favourite album? & 6. Least favourite album? aka. I ramble about all the albums.

Tough one… as the rules were vague, I decided to have a short opinion about each of the albums.

Herzeleid – Summary: a bunch of guys, born and raised in DDR, are tired of everything so they get together and play aggressive songs - you can almost smell the testosterone miles away while you are listening to this album. I have to admit that I love this album even though it’s not musically super creative. It’s just raw men with raw feelings – and I have to say, it works for me.

Sehnsucht – I was creeped out of the album art as a teenager, lol. But yeah, musically improved from the former one and there are some classic songs that make Rammstein as they are nowadays. I listen to this often when I’m driving.

Mutter – The album that they had the most struggles with if I have understood correctly. The pain can be heard through the songs and it’s so honest and raw. I lost my friend in 2004 tragically and this album was one of the things that kept me sane back then. Especially the beginning of the album (MHB, Links, Sonne) hits me hard in the guts.

Reise, reise – The album that started all this hype in me, so it has a special place in my heart. I also liked how they tried something different to their usual sounds in this one, like orchestral and acoustic songs.

Rosenrot – To be honest, this album has always left me a bit “cold”, so I cannot even make a real opinion of it. There are some good moments though, like Mann gegen Mann that really speaks to me.

Untitled: This has been on the loop since last August and I was honestly surprised how good the album was. I hadn’t listened to Rammstein for a while, but when I got this album to my hands after the concert, holy shit it hit me. I like hearing the path the guys have gone: their new music is much more mature than the first angry albums. Also, I love Till’s poetry in this one, like Was ich liebe and Weit weg.

I think I answered the question #7 already, so I’ll skip to #8.

8. Unpopular opinion about a member? A scandal? Anything?

Even though I appreciate Till as an artist and a poet, I don’t find his appearance attractive. You can throw rotten tomatoes at me now, but this is just my opinion, no means to offend anyone. Maybe the reason is that my taste for men tends to go for androgynous side, so I am not drawn towards very masculine men.

I’m not interested in Lindemann project and I don’t like their music so much, but the tour looked entertaining though. I bet all the people who attended had a lot of fun.

How Richard pronounces English is extremely sexy to my ear, even though it clearly sounds like a German guy trying to sound American - still, it’s like honey to my ears. Stupid man who makes my knees weak with everything he does.

I hate to admit that I don’t like Ohne dich so much. I don’t know why. :(

9. Have you ever seen them live? Tell me what you felt.

Three times this far! Oh man, I could talk about for hours how the concerts have made me feel, but I try to be reasonable now.

Ruisrock, Turku, 2005 – My first time seeing them live – and going to a festival without any adult supervision, so it was a special experience overall – and they blew my mind. It was raining and thundering and we were completely soaked with my friends, but it was worth it!

Bonus for everyone who managed to read this far: teenage me waiting for Rammstein to start playing, looking so badass with my denim jacket and R+ logo drawn with eyeliner. :D

Hartwall Arena, Helsinki, 2012: We went to the show together with my boyfriend to celebrate Valentine’s day and holy shiiiiit it was awesome. Hands down one of the best evenings of my life. I was so hooked to Rammstein afterward that when we were at my bf’s family’s cottage, his brother had to tell me to stop blasting Herzeleid all the time in the kitchen. :’D

Ratina Stadium, Tampere, 2019: Aka. byebye my life, say hello to fics, listening to the band all over again, stupid memes and all the content this fandom creates. I fell in love again with Rammstein during this concert.

I have tickets for Düsseldorf and Tallinn, but now I can only wait and stress that will Corona ruin everything. In that case, I’ll weep alone and write fics about the tour 2020 that ended up never happening.

10. Do you play any instruments? If you do can you play any song by them?

Yeah, I play guitar and piano but nowadays I mostly sing. Rammstein songs are super easy to play with guitar and I recently learnt to play Tattoo and Sex. Have been practicing Engle on piano as well. Some songs I like to sing are Deutschland, Tattoo and Engel. The “speaking” parts are difficult though. ^^;

I’m not sure who I could tag to this who hasn’t done it already, but I’ll try my luck: @ah-its-too-much​ @soronya​ @einemelodie​ @xiaolianhuax​ @so-darya-darya​ @maximaembra​ @kvidasjuklingur​

[hansptacek]

Falling For Stars

Collaborators: @sweetdreamsjetaime 💝/ edited by @lovebird1517 💖

Word Count: 3.5k

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Lucas Lallemant/Eliott Demaury

Summary: Rising star, Lucas Lallemant, has no clue what’s going on. For all he knows, his costar, Eliott Demaury, doesn’t give a fuck about him. He had made that pretty clear when he got all cozy with his girlfriend, Lucille, right in front of him. So can someone explain to him why the hell everyone thinks they’re dating? or Co-Stars to lovers!AU with all the angst/fluff and French shenanigans to keep me up at night!

Episode 1 - Regret.

AO3 Link

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He was falling into oblivion, willingly with no sense of control

Falling from the heavens, they would shine so bright

Falling into the ocean of his eyes,

they would pierce through the soul

Falling into the storms of his embrace, they would unravel the heart

The collision was inevitable, the comet’s end

No shooting star should feel this, to be a burning and dying wish

It was endlessly cold, infinitely dark amongst the others

He was the fallen star, forever trying to stay ablaze…

—The Little Lone Star

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SAMEDI 9:12

Lucas jolts awake by a sudden noise. He’s brought back to reality when he hears the roaring echoes of the shower being turned on.

He squints up at a pale ceiling that was not his own.  His was made out of glass that allowed him to gaze up at the stars whenever life got too rough. He’s always found comfort in them, but they are not here right now to calm his beating heart. Where the hell is he?  The bed sheets curled around his torso are definitely not his. They are soft and comforting yet suffocating at the same time. The tidiness and luxury of the bed are a sharp contrast to how messy and average he remembers his to be. He feels out of place. Seriously? What the hell is happening? The grey curtains hanging loosely against the glass frames barely prevent any sunlight from seeping through. Lucas almost goes blind while trying to blink his heavy eyes open.  He feels dizzy, disoriented and worst of all; like total absolute shit. Fuck! How much did he drink last night?

The hangover reduces Lucas to nothing but a living corpse. He tries his hardest to sober up, but every single one of his brain cells is screaming at him to stop overworking them.  Not only is the sun trying to blind him, but the birds outside are chirping loudly to God knows what tune. The sounds of bustling cars and productivity outside rang through his ears and intensifies his headache. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs at the absolute mess it is.  Suddenly, a cool breeze grazes his exposed skin sending a shiver through his whole body and leaving goosebumps in its wake. He curls up in the bedding once more but sits up in surprise when he notices that he was completely naked and space next to him is empty. He truly loathed his existence at the moment.

Lucas looks around the room with a big frown. The scattered clothes on the floor and the lone ripped condom packet by the trashcan don’t leave much to the imagination. Fuck, he had sex with someone yesterday in his drunken daze, didn’t he?

Lucas groans from the realization. He reaches for his clothes by the bed and tries to get dressed quickly. The sooner he gets the hell out of where ever the fuck he is, the quicker he would feel sane again.

He stops halfway through putting his shirt on when he hears the shower turn off. He turns to see an unfamiliar figure step out of the bathroom. Lucas chokes on air. The guy in front of him is half-naked, and Lucas’s brain short circuits. Droplets of water slowly drip down the man’s body, and Lucas uses his remaining self-control not to combust on the spot.

The nameless man seems unfazed by Lucas’s presence and proceeds to shake his damp chocolate curls into a small towel; his arm muscles flex with every movement. He looks unreal with a lean body that’s as tall as the door frame and broad, muscular shoulders. His skin is pale, and the yellow tint of sunlight makes him look as if he’s glowing.

Lucas snaps out of his daze and mentally scolds himself for thirsting over a stranger. The shame he was feeling a few moments ago comes back to hit him once again at full force.

Lucas doesn’t properly look at the guy’s face, but he knows.

It’s not him.

This man, as hot as he is, is not the one he wishes him to be. The one he dreams he could wake up to every morning. The one he wants is not his to take and keep. Lucas can’t even fantasize about what it would feel like to be with him. Yet, there’s an invisible pull that always leads straight to him.

Him, who, ever since the beginning, would send his heart running for the hills whenever he made eye contact with those steel blue eyes. God those eyes.

Lucas is too hungover to handle all this shit this early in the morning. He feels like an avalanche is submerging him. His whole body is frozen, and his heart is heavy. He fucked up. He really fucked up this time.

It hits him out of nowhere as the events of last night clear up in his head.

Regret.

***

YESTERDAY NIGHT, VENDREDI 21:41

The camera lights are flashing and lighting up the night. Lucas scoffs at all the people dressed in big fancy gowns and expensive suits. He wants to tell them that this is The César Awards and not a fashion show. Lucas lets it go because he won’t allow any negativity tonight.

He’s rejoicing because Je T’aime won Best Film. It’s the first movie Lucas played in that gained so much success. He even got nominated for the award of Best Actor because of it, but sadly he lost it to his costar, Eliott Demaury.

Lucas’s not even mad about it because anyone that has ever worked with Eliott knows that the man has a natural talent in acting.

Lucas remembers how shocked he was when he received the news that he would be staring along Eliott. Around that time, Lucas’s career in acting was starting to pick up after the public loved his performance in La Honte. His portrayal of a struggling teen with Tourette’s syndrome blew the masses away because it was the first time they saw mental illness depicted in a positive light. Two days after the news, he got to read over the script and instantly fell in love.

The film was based off a best-selling novel; about a Canadian teen, Hugo Babineaux, sent to study abroad in Paris, France. While there, he falls for his host family’s eldest son, Julien Favre. Julien is a devout Catholic, but couldn’t resist falling in love with the Hugo. Their forbidden love is passionate and bittersweet, as the film touches on the issues of homophobia and religion—the journey of coming to accept one’s sexuality and owning up to who you want to be.

Lucas practiced day and night to make sure he matched Eliott’s talent and did the role of Hugo justice.

But no amount of practice could have prepared him for the first time he met Eliott. Because fucking hell, the guy was beyond gorgeous in person.

Eliott’s icy gaze left Lucas breathless.

And I’m falling so hard for you.

He almost broke his neck from having to gaze up at him.

Would you be there to catch me, too?

He couldn’t be real. Those luminous caramel locks had to be made from strands of silk, entwisted, like a storm. He looked like an angel among men.

Maybe I should keep this to myself.

It was honestly intimidating to be working first time with such a renowned actor.

Waiting ‘til I know you better.

Lucas could only hope his weak, stupid heart could take it.

I don’t wanna be something you can throw away.

The film was a massive hit; the fans went crazy for the chemistry that Lucas and Eliott shared. They were the perfect duo. Lucas had come to understand everyone’s fondness towards Eliott, especially when he smiled so big that it reached his eyes. Or how his kind and bright demeanor would light up the room. But those little things shouldn’t matter. Why should he care that Eliott made his heart flip every time he enters a room? 

It’s nothing but stage fright jitters. Lucas would reassure himself. 

Eliott is an enigma. His happy-go-lucky attitude is a starch contrast to the vivid and dynamic characters he plays. His first role was that of a blind prodigal genius painter who had to adapt to life after a tragic accident flipped his whole world upside down. His performance in the movie landed him many awards, and he became one of the youngest actors to win the prestigious award in France.

Despite the unworldly harmony between Lucas and Eliott on the big screen and during interviews, it’s an entirely different story behind the scenes.

Anyone who knew these two could see the tension between them. Eliott loves to tease, calling him a hedgehog because of his wild spiky hair, and Lucas tries very hard not to blush every time he touched it.  He also tends to sneak up on him and whisper random things in his ears, and that makes Lucas lose his mind. And Eliott’s answer to his flustered face is to outright laugh at him. Why did he let this guy get to him so much? Every time they would touch even by accident, Lucas would feel breathless.

Eliott must be doing it on purpose; he must enjoy seeing Lucas reduced to a complete mess.

But Lucas is done with these little games.

He plans to confront Eliott tonight and ask him exactly what the hell they are.

Lucas tried his best to avoid doing relationships, only settling for one night stands. He’s too scared of the paparazzi invading his privacy. Besides, Lucas isn’t out to the public yet. But he feels something for Eliott and is willing to risk it all for the chance of being in a relationship with him.

Lucas makes his way backstage to Eliott’s dressing room where the talk will take place. If everything goes well, they would be boyfriends by the end of the night. He abruptly stops when he sees Eliott in front of the room arms hooked around the small waist of a brunette. Lucas has seen her before. Her name’s Lucille Dubois; a supermodel, singer, and songwriter. She’s famous and loved by everyone. Lucas swallows the lump in his throat. They look good together. Perfect.

Of course, they would be dating. Lucas turns away, and his heart clenches at the reality that nothing could ever happen between Eliott and him. All the sneaky touches and stolen looks were for nothing. He can’t believe he let himself think that there was a chance Eliott would like him back.

He needs a drink. Now.

He heads straight out for the bar.

***

After only a few shots, the world around Lucas starts to spin, and he feels the adrenaline pumping through his whole body.  

That’s when he sees it: a pair of long legs striding towards him in determination. Muscular and veiny hands pull him wrap around his waist and pull him in a tight hug. There’s barely any space between them, and Lucas shivers when a deep voice whispers in his eyes.

Lucas wishes the nameless hands buried in his hair belong to Eliott. But the reality hits when the man says in a low and raspy voice.

“I’m Étienne.”

Lucas looks away from his lips to his darkening eyes. Lucas is sure he won’t remember the name for very long, but he nods and presses his lips against his in a heated kiss.

He doesn’t know how they got to the apartment. Which wall he’s currently pressed against, but Lucas doesn’t complain. Their clothes are gone the moment they get to the bedroom.

Behind his closed lids, Lucas sees red flashes of visions. Is it another daydream? A memory? All he sees are familiar dark eyes piercing through him. Not now, please. Lucas runs his hand through Étienne’s hair in hopes of distracting himself from thinking of Eliott.

Why is he in my mind right now?

Étienne’s warm lips trace Lucas’s collarbone, and Lucas wonders what Eliott’s lips will feel like on his skin. He hates the fact that he’s so jealous of Lucille. All Lucas wanted to do when he saw Lucille wrapped in Eliott’s arms was to replace her. He wants to be the one that gets to kiss Eliott every time he wants and feel his beautiful hands on his body.

But that would never happen because Eliott doesn’t love me.

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PRESENT, SAMEDI 9:31

A voice fades in,“…��cas, Lucas? Hello? Still with me?”

Lucas blinks at the waving hand in from his face. He cranes his neck up to look into a pair of concerned onyx eyes.

“Great, you’re back. You scared me.” Ethan? Elias? Says with a sigh.

His face immediately lights up when he locks eyes with Lucas.

“How was the view from up there? Did you catch any stars?”

His deep voice brings Lucas back to reality. Lucas must have been mentally gone for a long time because the man was now dressed in dark jeans and a black hoodie. He was also holding a coffee cup in each hand. The aroma of the drinks makes him crave the caffeine he needed to wake up.

Lucas quirks his lips because he’s suddenly feeling shy. He’s still half-naked and is in desperate need of a shower. He stares at the wall behind the boy trying to find his way out of this shitty situation.

‘I’m sorry, but it’s been fun.’ No, too passive. ‘Look, this can’t happen again.’ Too insensitive. ‘It’s not you; it’s me?’ What a fucking cliche.

“Uh, ahem—No stars, just really tired.” He settles avoiding eye contact at all cost.

“Yeah, I get that.” The pretty stranger chuckles softly with a coy smirk.

“I mean we didn’t get much sleep last night. Are you sure you are okay?”

Lucas nods shyly, cheeks heating up.  

“Good. How about some coffee? Croissants?” The guy smiles brightly and gosh, why does he have to be so lovely? It only makes him feel ten times worst for what he’s about to do.

“Coffee should do, thank you…?” Lucas dragged it out, waiting for a name as he takes the cup of coffee. The handsome stranger seems to get the memo and answers quickly. “It’s Étienne, Étienne Calvet.” Étienne’s smile grows wider when Lucas almost spills coffee on himself.

Étienne Calvet. The name rings a bell; he’s a famous model in Paris. He has soulful eyes and perfect features that are often present on brand names such as Givenchy, Lanvin, Prada, and YSL. Lucas heard a lot about him because Étienne is also a writer and openly bisexual. Lucas mentally scolds himself for not realizing who he is sooner.

“No need to thank me. Listen, last night, we didn’t have time to introduce ourselves, but I know you. Lucas Lallemant, right?”

Lucas could only nod, still in shock. Étienne squeals.

“Wow! I can’t believe it. You almost won the César Awards. Congratulations on the nomination! The movie was beautiful. That scene where he dives into the ocean when he found out—” Étienne goes onto praising Je T'aime in great detail.

Lucas wants to dig a grave and bury himself in it. Étienne sounds genuinely interested and excited like a fanboy meeting their favorite celebrity for the first time. Lucas is not sure if he should be flattered or creeped out.

He doesn’t have much time to think about it. He needs to come clean to this guy. He swallows his guilt down and proceeds to grab the sheets around his waist, giving Étienne a stern look as he gets up from the bed.

“Look, thank you, Étienne.” Étienne’s smile only gets brighter.  

“For everything but I’m sorry this…” Lucas gestures between them. “It can’t happen again…” Lucas feels like vanishing into thin air when he sees Étienne’s eyes dime slightly. He gazes downward for a few seconds before bringing his face back up with his signature smile.

“As I said before, no need to thank me. But could we at least be friends?” Étienne is now looking down at the ground again, resembling a kicked puppy. He has a way of making Lucas feel like a total dick.

Lucas knows it’s not a good idea. He should decline and spare Étienne the heartbreak, but he’s not thinking clearly right now. So he holds out his hand with a small smile.

“Okay. Just friends.”

***

***

SAMEDI 10:19

After almost an hour or so, Lucas finally steps out into the streets of Paris. After running through the shower and exchanging numbers with Étienne, they said their goodbyes. Étienne’s hopeful expression is going to haunt Lucas forever. But for now, Lucas pushes all that away and focuses on getting home.

Lucas has always loved mornings the most out of all the times of the day. Fresh air, dew on the pavement and the calming ambiance are precisely what he needs at the moment to relax.

Which is why he decides to take a short walk around the city. He still can’t believe he slept with a complete stranger. A part of him gets it; he was heartbroken and miserable. For fuck sakes, the guy he loves is dating another person. He had every right to act on his emotions. He fell for Eliott like those shooting stars he sees every night before falling asleep. Ugh.

He shakes his head to snap out of his negative thoughts. This needs to stop. Seriously. He needs to focus.

Lost in thought, Lucas doesn’t notice a group of suspicious men following him. The men were discreetly taking pictures of Lucas, trying to figure out where he was last night. According to the rumors, Lucas left with a special someone. They were vultures preying on the carcass of any previous night’s drama.

They wanted to be the first one to get the scoop, and so they hurriedly make their way to an unsuspecting Lucas.

“Lucas Lallemant! Monsieur Lallemant! Can we ask what your whereabouts were last night!?”

Fuck. My. Life.

Lucas mentally curses his luck. He knew this was going to happen eventually, but why now? Lucas knows he looks like complete crap right now, and that’s not an appropriate look for the cameras. Great fucking timing. The universe must be laughing at him.

“Monsieur Lallemant, are you aware of the rife speculations that you might be seeing someone? Can you tell us who!” One of them urges boldly. What kind of sick question is that? Lucas is shaking; not only from anger but also from fear.

His fears of being outed. He’s afraid the world would criticize him, and people would label him as just another “gay icon.” He didn’t want to be a label. He’s just a man named Lucas that happens to like other men. That should not be a reason for people to criticize him.

Did they see us? Who else saw him leave the party?

Lucas is usually really good at dealing with the mobs of paparazzi, but today, he is beyond exhausted. Not wanting to start a scene, he quickly covers his face and flees from the scene. He vaguely hears them say something about a hickey at the back of his neck followed with the sounds of cameras flashing.

His eyes widen in panic.

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

Lucas can’t breathe because his lungs are now filled with dread. His heart is drumming quickly in his chest.  

Flashes of this father’s disappointed scowl washed over him. He feels sick to his stomach. His dad hated his existence already, so what would he think when he founds out Lucas is gay?

He would probably say with a disgusted face that he was disappointed in Lucas.

No!

Why should he even bother if he’s going to be a disappointment anyway?

Shut up!

Why can’t he be like the others? He just had to end up being the unwanted gay son, didn’t he?

Stop it!

Lucas starts running; becoming one with the wind. He is running away from not only the paparazzi but also all his problems. His heels are clicking on the stone pavement as he zooms past pedestrians and street performers. 

Could this day get any worse?

And the universe gladly accepts the challenge. Within the next moment, his phone starts vibrating from a message. Lucas abruptly slows down and hesitantly pulls the device from his pocket, unlocking the screen.

It’s from him.

Eliott.

Eliott: “Mind telling me why people are saying we started dating?”

Eliott: “You could’ve asked me first, Lulu. ♥️”

The next text sent makes his heart drop. It’s a slightly blurry picture of himself leaving the bar. He looks extremely drunk and is holding hands with someone. Lucas is a hundred percent sure it’s Étienne dragging Lucas to his apartment. Thank fuck, the picture is so blurry no one could see anything but Lucas. However, the headline reads, “WHO WAS THIS MYSTERIOUS NEW FLAME?” And the article goes into details of webbing lies out of the photo.  

It’s like time had stopped and the world froze. Lucas’ head is pounding from everything that’s happening at once.  

This was it — the biggest mistake of his life.

He wishes for a falling star to crash upon him. He just wants it to end it all.

//

TO BE CONTINUED…

//

(A/N: Oh.My.God. This is my first time writing fanfiction, guys! I hope you guys enjoyed it!! Special thanks to @sweetdreamsjetaime and @lovebird1517 for helping me!

Additional info: I’m thinking of making this into a tv show format about these two soulmates having to work for their love (the angst, the drama!) but it’ll be worth it by the end. There’s going to be behind the scenes content too (meaning; covers, magazines, and social media content?), so watch out for those (SKAM style👀). I would also love to read your feedback and any thoughts you have on the story! ☺️ Thank you so much for reading! Best wishes!🌠)

[delicioussshame]

I’ve spent so much time in the last month opening the second part of the MoShen thing and staring I decided fuck it, I’m writing part three, maybe it will help. Try getting Shen Qingqiu and Mobei-Jun to talk about sex without intermediaries and see how you like it.

Anyway, all you need to know for part three is that they’ve been fucking long enough to be comfortable around each other.

Now, Shang Qinghua’s pov.

That noise wasn’t Mobei-Jun. The voice was too loud and too high to come from his king.  

Shang Qinghua should have expected this would happen sooner or later. He wrote Mobei-Jun after all. He was also a demon king, like Bing-ge. Men like them have needs and many admirers more than willing to fulfill them. Of course his king isn’t celibate. Just because Shang Qinghua had never bothered to include love interests for him doesn’t mean he has none.  

And if that voice was male, well, Shang Qinghua should have expected that too, considering what happened to his stallion protagonist. Obviously Cucumber-bro fucked everyone up by messing with the story.  

The part of him with no sense of self-preservation, that part Shang Qinghua tried so hard to kill, that part really wonders what’s Mobei-Jun’s type. His king always looks so blank, it’s impossible to know what he likes. What kind of man managed to get through Mobei-Jun’s reserve? Shang Qinghua doesn’t have much presence, especially compared to all the demons roaming around. He can probably open the door to his king’s quarters silently enough not to be heard considering they’re not exactly paying attention.  

The first thing he notices is Mobei-Jun's back, because hello, that is a nice back. Shang Qinghua wants to run his tongue all over those muscles, now would be good.  

The second thing he notices are the white, delicate fingers digging into the meat of Mobei-Jun's shoulders and the slim, just as fair legs framing his hips. Huh. Shang Qinghua would have figured that if Mobei-Jun took a man to bed, he would still be a fighter, someone able to stand his own against him. Those hands belong to a musician or a scholar, maybe. Closer to his than Mobei-Jun's underlings’, without talons or claws or anything but normal, well-trimmed nails.  

The rest of the person is hidden behind Mobei-Jun's obviously bigger body. That’s too bad. It’s not helping Shang Qinghua finding out what his king is into.  

He should really go, shouldn’t he? What he’s doing is wrong, and Mobei-Jun will kill him if he catches him staring like a creeper.  

It’s just really, really hard to stop looking at Mobei-Jun as he keeps thrusting into the person half sitting on his desk, fuck. Shang Qinghua gave reports while Mobei-Jun was sitting at that desk! Hell, he’d sat there once! Now all he’s going to be able to think about when he sees it is how hot it would be to get fucked on it, shit! And that ass! That ass is fiiiine. He likes to think they’re past the stage of their relationship where Mobei-Jun would kill him if he got too close, but he still believes he would get brutally murdered if he tried to slap that ass, no matter how no one sane could resist that kind of temptation. And he still hasn’t seen who he’s giving it too! Just a glimpse at his face would be enough! He could find out who it is from that. He’s good at gathering info, and maybe it’s a named character.  

Before he can convince himself to stop being a worse pervert than Cucumber-bro thinks he is just because he had to write porn to survive, Mobei-Jun crunches slightly to… he’s picking him up! Obviously Mobei-Jun can just pick him some guy and carry him around. He could probably fuck like that without even straining himself.  

Shank Qinghua rues the day he decided to write all his fantasies into one character.  

The move is going to change the angle, so maybe he sees the guy’s face… after he makes sure they can’t see him. There’ll be no point if Mobei-Jun assassinates him.  

Long black hair… Also pretty standard, not much to help identify hi…

His heart sinks into his chest. That can’t… It totally is Cucumber-bro being fucked mindless by Mobei-Jun. Fuck.  

Fuck.

He needs to get out of here now.

______________

He’s been on his peak for two weeks and he still feels like shit. His mind just can’t accept what he saw. If he hadn’t seen him himself, he would have never believed it.

How did they even fall in love? It’s not like Shen Qingqiu has an unfulfilled demon kink. He had Luo Binghe for fuck’s sake! The protagonist! Arguably the hottest man in this whole universe, who is completely crazy for him! He didn’t have to take Mobei-Jun too!

But that must be what happened. Mobei-Jun is loyal to Luo Binghe. He wouldn’t sleep with his beloved husband out of lust, and honestly neither would Shen Qingqiu. If they’re having an affair while Bing-ge is away, they must really care for each other.

Shen Qingqiu and Mobei-Jun.  

Yeah, that happened. Shang Qinghua can’t live in denial forever. He’s just gonna have to deal with the fact that Shen Qingqiu is the demonic ideal and he barely exists for them. He’s not anywhere near as attractive as them all anyway. He should have known he had no chance from the beginning.  

And if that hurts, that’s just Shang Qinghua’s life. He’s the writer. He’s supposed to be outside of the story anyway. And nothing nice ever happened to the original Shang Qinghua, so why would it change for him?  

So he’s just going to have to swallow down the hurt and deal with it.  

Just not yet.  

______________

It takes all he has not to freak out when Mobei-Jun wakes him up one morning. “My king! What are you doing here?” He hasn’t stopped by An Ding Peak to get him in years.

He hadn’t needed to. Shang Qinghua spent most of his time at his or Bing-ge’s castles now.  

He had just needed a break. Everyone needs a break from time to time, okay? Nothing wrong with that.  

As long as you’re not Mobei-Jun, apparently. “You haven’t given me reports in weeks.”

Shang Qinghua can’t meet his king’s eyes. “Apologies, my king. Urgent business kept me on my peak.”  

Mobei-Jun doesn’t have to say a word for Shang Qinghua to understand that he couldn’t care less about his “urgent business.” Great, now he’s feeling guilty for skipping on his duties on top of it all. Great.  

“What’s wrong?”

Shang Qinghua flinches and blinks in astonishment. Did his king just ask him… He raises his head instinctively to look at him, meets his eyes for a second, has a very vivid flash of the last time he saw him and looks down again. “There’s nothing wrong, my king,” he says, trying to control the shaking of his hands.  

“…You’re coming back.” Not a question. Shit.

“Tomorrow, so that I can wrap things up before leaving.”

Mobei-Jun frowns, but allows it.

Shang Qinghua falls face first in his bed the moment he leaves.  

His life is terrible.

______________

“You look terrible.”

Shang Qinghua is going to slap Shen Qingqiu. Watch him. “I’ve been busy.” Why is he even here? Doesn’t he have better things to do, like Mobei-Jun?

“With what.”

“Things on An Ding. There’s always something to take care of.”

Shen Qingqiu shrugs. “There’s nothing especially important going on at the sect right now. Your disciples are used to you being away.”

The last thing he needs right now is being interrogated by Shen Qingqiu. “Why do you care?”

Shen Qingqiu blinks in surprise. “Can’t I visit? I haven’t heard from you in weeks.”

Because that’s how Shang Qinghua had liked it, thanks. I know what you sound like when you’re getting fucked now! Right now I’m half embarrassed, half jealous as hell and half terrified for all our lives when Luo Binghe finds out you’re cheating on him!

He has to calm down. And, shit, he’s going to have to talk about this, because he’s not kidding about lives being endangered here. If this is what he wants, Shen Qingqiu is going to have to do this properly and tell Bing-ge before he decides only Mobei-Jun’s blood will suffice to soothe his anger. “That’s because I didn’t want to talk to you. You fucked up, Bro.”

Shen Qingqiu obviously wasn’t expecting it. Does he think he covered his tracks too well? When Shang Qinghua just walked on them? “What are you even talking about?”

“Before I left, I went to see Mobei-Jun, and he wasn’t alone.”

Damn it, Shen Qingqiu isn’t catching on. “Who was he with?”

Why is he so blind? And does he manage to catch everyone while being this obvious? “Do you really need me to spell it out?”

“Yes.”

“You.”  

“...And?”

Seriously? “You two were busy, if you know what I mean, and Bro, if you have issues with Luo Binghe don’t drag my king into it! Do you realise your husband is going to kill your lover when he finds out! Are you really so stupid you thought he would never? I just walked in on you both! It could have been anyone!” He slaps the table for good measure, making the tea cups rattle. Better than Shen Qingqiu’s face. If he had done that, he’d have two demon kings after his blood. Hurrah.

Shen Qingqiu stares at him, his face completely blanched for a few minutes, before it becomes so red Shang Qinghua fears he’s cooking from the inside. “That... wasn’t what you’re thinking.”

“Bro, please, I saw plenty. Do you need me to give you details? Because I can. You two were fucking, no mistaking it.”

Shen Qingqiu is hiding behind his fan, but he can’t hide his embarrassment like that. “Well, yes, but...” and the rest of the sentence is inaudible.

“What?”

“It was Binghe’s idea! Which makes it yours, since you’re the one that gave him all those weird kinks! What's wrong with you! What’s the childhood trauma you were projecting there! Couldn’t you have remained a lurker instead of getting delusions of grandeur and writing the world’s shittiest online novel! I hate you so much.”

Okay, so, what? It was Luo Binghe’s idea?

Luo Binghe’s idea!? “Bro, what the fuck? Luo Binghe doesn’t strike me as the sharing type.”  

“Yes, well, that’s the problem, isn’t it.”  

They’re talking about this, are they? Never mind, Shang Qinghua wants to know what happened to his characters, and what kind of plotline is that? “Tell me.”

Even his ears are red. “That’s really not your business.”

Cucumber-bro might have tried to deflect by getting angry at him, but they’ve known each other long enough that he can tell he’s still really, really embarrassed. Too bad. He made his life shit for weeks, causing him to worry he’d have a funeral to attend, he can get over himself for a couple minutes. “Ìt kind of is. As of this moment, it would be the responsible thing for me to go tell Luo Binghe what happened, since he’s everyone’s lord and everything. Who knows how he would react?”

“Don’t do it! He might murder you if he knows you saw me... like that.” Shang Qinghua can almost see the steam coming out of his ears.  

“Then explain.”

“It’s not logical. It’s... weird.”

“That’s nothing new. Bing-ge is never logical when it comes to you. And you’re the one fucking Mobei-Jun, not him.”

Cucumber-bro takes a deep breath. “Luo Binghe is scared I’m going to cheat on him when he’s away, so he... arranged someone to make sure it doesn’t happen.”  

Shang Qinghua’s jaw falls. That really makes no sense. “Bro, he must know you wouldn’t do that.”

“It’s not really that, it’s more like... He doesn’t want me to be lonely and tempted. I told you it wasn’t logical.”

Okay. He can kind of see Bing-ge worrying his husband was alone and sad while he wasn’t with him, but to the point of whoring out his king? “You were right, that’s some kink he’s got.” No one as obsessed as Luo Binghe lets his lover sleep with other people if they don’t get off on it.  

Wait. “Does he watch? Does he participate!? Are you having threesomes with my king!!?”

Cucumber-bro is now crimson, and the lack of denial leaves Shang Qinghua even more jealous than he was a week ago. Shen Qingqiu really overtook all of the wives’ sex lives, did he? When does he sleep? How does he walk!? Does he exude pheromones irresistible to demons? Is all of Luo Binghe’s entourage just waiting for their chance to hit that?  

Talking about his entourage. “Is this common knowledge? Because you’re very bad at hiding it considering I just walked on you.”

“Of course not! Think of Luo Binghe’s reputation!”

“Then hide better!”

Shen Qingqiu snorts, regaining some composure. “You’re an idiot.”

Excuse me? “I’m an idiot? Me? You’re the one who gets fucked on a desk and doesn’t even lock the door!”

Composure: exploded. Shang Qinghua gives himself a point. “Not anyone could have walked in!”

“Yes they could have! I did!”

Shen Qingqiu looks exasperated. “Mobei-Jun’s quarters are shielded and guarded against intruders. You’re just one of the very few people that’s allowed to waltz in.”

That’s right. He always just showed up whenever he felt like it and no one ever said a thing. He just thought he was too insignificant to stop. If Mobei-Jun didn’t want him there, he’d let it known. “Oh.”

“Yes, oh.”

“...Bro, can you tell him I know?”

Something passes over Shen Qingqiu’s face. “No. Tell him yourself.”

“Bro! He’s gonna kill me! Forget it, he doesn’t need to know. I’ll just pretend it never happened and walk really loudly when I stop by.”

Shen Qingqiu grabs his shoulders to make him stand still. “Airplane-bro, tell him.”

He whines. “Why?”

Shen Qingqiu is getting impatient. “Do it.” Or else being very much implied.  

Since Shen Qingqiu’s “or else” carries a lot of weight even before he starts throwing his husband’s and his lover’s weight around, Shang Qinghua knows he’s been left no choice. “Fine. Whatever.” He can tell Mobei-Jun he saw him fucking Shen Qingqiu. That’s nothing. Mobei-Jun doesn’t have an embarrassed bone in his body. He’ll probably just be a little bit disgusted, that’s all.  

No problem.  

[p-and-p-admin]

Interview given to The Severus Snape and Hermione Granger Shipping Fan Group.  (sharing here Admin approved)

https://www.facebook.com/groups/199718373383293/

Hello Aurette and welcome to Behind the Quill, thank-you for letting us get to know you a little better.

I'm deeply honoured to be asked.

A true titan in the world of SS/HG fic, many of our readers will have broken their hearts over your story The Tattered Man.

Okay, let’s jump right in.

What's the story behind your pen name?

Honestly, it was a whim. Long before I thought of writing, I needed a login name to read fanfic. It was a play on Auror. I had no idea it was an actual name.

Which Harry Potter character do you identify with the most?

Hands down, Snape. I know that might sound strange, but he was the one that clicked. My niece introduced me to the books. Being in my 30s at the time, I already had kids of my own, so I didn't identify as one of the students. I loved Harry from the start but he had this uncanny ability to keep being wrong about nearly everything. The character who best expressed adult annoyance with that was Snape. And I do love a good jerk. Snape was a jerk.

Do you have a favourite genre to read? 

I'm a sucker for fantasy and science fiction. I hated reading as a child. All there was available when I was a kid was Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys and it was insipid. I glommed on to mythology early but once I'd read all the books in my library on the subject, I gave up reading at all. That was about 4th grade. Children's books in the 70s were total garbage and YA books only had one author: Judy Bloom.

Ironically, my first job was working in a bookstore. It was a college bookstore, so it was all textbooks. I wasn't even a student, so I had no interest in any of them. One semester. A Lit prof assigned Fahrenheit 451. The cover art caught my eye and I read the blurb. Then started reading the book. I finished it in about 5hrs. It blew my mind. I had no idea writing like that existed. And the book was about someone discovering the value of books. It was intellectual Inception waaaaay before that was a thing.

After that, it was like a switch flipped in my head. I sucked up books air. I was never without a book or two. Or three...

Do you have a favourite "classic" novel?

Obviously Fahrenheit 451. I'm going to go ahead and say Les Miserables as well. I was in my 30s when I finally read it and sobbed like a baby at the ending. The care and tenderness Hugo showed when portraying these disposable lives were so unique for that age. Sadly, even today. A lot of our culture is wrapped around the belief that only the wealthy have value and beauty is a pathway to wealth. The poor and ugly are a constant plague to be shunned or dealt with, not humans with crushed dreams that deserve to be valued in their own right. Look at how often fanfic recreatesSnape as handsome or Hermione as gorgeous. Those are always the least interesting stories. (hops off soapbox)

At what age did you start writing?

Whatever age I was when I wrote Safe House. Probably 40ish? That terrible little fanfic is literally the first thing I ever wrote beyond shopping lists and emails. It's an ugly child, but my first, so I love its pointy head. I intentionally leave it up so new writers can see my learning curve. No one starts out good. Read my stories in reverse chronological order and you'll see they get a little worse each time. That's how much I grew as I learned the craft.

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

Reading tons of it. I was at a total loss after the book Deathly Hallows came out and it was all over. Reading it had become an event in my house. My husband and I would snatch the book out of each other's hands "You've had it long enough. My turn." And then there were no more...

I couldn't even tell you how I found fanfic, but it kept me sane. I keyed in on SS/HG because at the time there was a noticeable difference in the talent level in that ship. I must have read SS/HG fanfic for a solid 2 yrs before I took a leap and wrote my own. I was inspired by the amazing stories, but also by the crappy ones.  "Heck, I could do better" became its own form of allowance. So I had a small 'what if' and just went for it. Of course, it was crap, everyone's first is. But taking the leap and writing it was a huge thing for me to have done.

What's the best theme you've ever come across in a fic? Is it a theme represented in your own works?

I'm a sucker for a story where characters overcome emotional adversity, both external and internal. If you squint. You'll see that theme repeated throughout my fics.

What fandoms are you involved in other than Harry Potter?

None. Nothing else ever grabbed me as a sandbox I wanted to play in before or after HP.

If you could make one change to canon, what would it be? Do you have a favourite piece of fanon?

Gosh, I don't think I would change a thing about JK Rowling's work. Things I would change would only be me forcing her story to fit my preferred ideal. However, if you think about it, her world, the good and the bad,  challenged all of us to churn out 100,000+ what ifs. Some out of anger. Heh.

As for fav piece of fanon, probably that Malfoy jr was Snape's godson. He's totally not, but whoever started that created a great layering of the dynamic between them that you can share in so many tones.

Do you listen to music when you write or do you prefer quiet?  

I was a stay-at-home mom when I was writing most of my fanfics, so I wrote in a chaotic and very noisy environment. I didn't listen to music when I wrote, but music was often the inspiration. When I would get stuck in writing, I would leave it and go listen to music that was emotionally similar to where I wanted the story to be while I thrashed out plot points. Colossus by Afro Celt Sound System is amazing for plotting a prelude to a battle.

What are your favourite fanfictions of all time?

Gosh, there are so many. Sadly, many of the authors who first inspired me are gone and pulled their fics off the web, like my fanfic bestie Dressagegrrrl. I would have to call out Pet Project by Caeria as the one I found most inspiring.  Anything by ApolloniaV is pretty high up there in my book. There are dozens I'm forgetting. There was one called Resurrection Man about Snape accidentally creating a hilarious Zombie apocalypse. Best. Fic. Ever. It disappeared from the web when the author moved on. An incredible loss.

Are you a plotter or a pantser? How does that affect your writing process?

Total pantser. The obvious effect is to drive the story right off a cliff and be unable to salvage it. It's why I vowed to never start posting until I had a rough draft ending. Too many dead stories waiting for an ending that never came. But an outline for me is a killer in disguise. I lose interest in telling the tale because I already did in the outline. The fun part is over. Sitting at a keyboard typing your fingers off, while muttering, "What the hell are these people doing? Who's writing this stuff?!" is an amazing experience.

What is your writing genre of choice?

In fanfic, I ran with every genre there was. Mostly I wanted to see if there was one I couldn't tackle.  Most of my o-fic is a hard-to-define mishmash of fantasy and sci-fi. I want to write romance, but it always turns into something complicated and angsty that no longer fits the box.

Which of your stories are you most proud of? Why?

The Tattered Man.

Did it unfold as you imagined it or did you find the unexpected cropped up as you wrote?

It came off exactly as I'd planned in my head. A rare occurrence for me.

What did you learn from writing it?

I could make people cry with my words. Up to that point, I'd made readers laugh and yell and blush, but to get a reader to the point of actually weeping? That's not easy. JK Rowling did it with ease. It was a challenge.

How personal is the story to you, and do you think that made it harder or easier to write?

It's very personal. My father had just died.  He'd had cancer, and it might have got him in the end, but what actually killed him was being sent home with a feeding tube and the wrong instructions. None of the homecare nurses realized the mistake until his kidneys shut down. It was devastating. When I next took up writing, I was still hurting so I tried to make others feel what I felt at a death that didn't have to be. It was crazy easy to write. I wrote it all in one day. Based on the reviews, I achieved my goal. It helped me work through my loss. Pretty sure I gave a few readers PTSD. My bad.

What books or authors have influenced you?

My all-time favourite book is Iain M. Banks' Use of Weapons. Definitely a classic among the eighteen people in the United States that read it. The man was a shockingly gifted author and I was devastated when he passed away. His ability to just drop you into the action from the first page and not bother to explain what's going on is sadistic genius.

How do you think that shows in your writing?

It led to my belief that a writer is always better when they assume their readers are smart. Grab their interest and just run. They'll catch on and even pass you with their theories of what's going to happen next. I've no patience with stories that spell out everything in minute detail. They're tedious and insulting. Less really is more. On the other hand, writing over your reader's head is just as annoying. Intentionally using obscure SAT words in your story just makes you a pretentious twat. Unless your character is a pretentious twat and it's part of the dialogue.  In that case, twat away. *gigglesnort*

Do people in your everyday life know you write fanfiction?

My family all knew. They were tremendously supportive. Especially Mr. Aurette, my personal Snape. Outside of my family, I was less forthcoming. Mostly because it was so crazy hard to explain. I think it's a lot less weird now, but back then? It was far more stigmatized.

How true for you is the notion of "writing for yourself"?

That's a hard one. For someone who'd never tried to write a story before, it was an amazing journey to realise what I could do. That changed me forever. Having the instant feedback of reviews was intrinsic to that experience. The downside is you can get sucked into writing for reviewers, and they will tell you clearly what they want and expect.  That can stifle. I knew no one wanted The Tattered Man to end the way it did. I was pretty terrified of the reaction. But it's what I wanted. It was the entire point. I wrote that ending for myself, but I cowered after posting.

How important is it for you to interact with your audience? How do you engage with them? Just at the point of publishing? Through social media?

I absolutely loved interacting with my readers. I made some real-life friends and some really great fic buddies all over the world. I watched them become friends in reviews too. It was a really great experience. Spam-posting a fic would often take on a festival atmosphere. Unfortunately, when my review count started to really take off, I couldn't cope with the sheer numbers the same way. There weren't enough hours on the day to reply to everyone. Trying to personalize my response to a review grew overwhelming. I actually grew quite depressed over it. Connecting on a more removed, professional level seemed cold. I connected the most on Livejournal when that was a thing. But I had to back off. "Aurette" became far more witty and wonderful than I was in real life. Everyone wanted a piece of her. I couldn't keep up with the bitch. Lol.  I faded away from most interactions on social media out of self-preservation. Even tiny fame can make you whacko.

What is the best advice you've received about writing?

There's a few that come to mind.

1-If you want to be a better writer, kill every adverb you come across.

2-Read your words out loud to yourself. If you run out of breath, your reader will run out of patience at that exact point.

3-Dressagegrrrl was the one that finally made me see how playing POV ping pong within a scene was something that marked my writing as an amateur.

4-Stop trying to be clever. Be clever, if you are clever, but don't try. It comes off hamfisted every time. Readers hate that.

5-Never, ever, ever post something you wrote that day. You've left half of it in your head and you can't tell. It's awful.

6-If you're not even a little embarrassed by something you wrote 6 months ago, you're no longer growing as a writer.

What do you do when you hit writer's block?

That's a bit of a sticking point. Stress is a muse-killer. Anything you can do to rid yourself of stress will help. Writer's block is usually the result of something going on elsewhere in your life. Fix that and the creativity will come back.

That said, my life has turned into constant stress with the result being I no longer write at all.

Has anything in real life trickled down into your writing?

Everything has. 'Write what you know' is true for fantasy too. Whether it's heartbreak, or a drunken hookup that turned into love (Hello, Mr. Aurette) or a moment when you were a child and ignored or teased, or maybe the bully, all of it makes it's way into the emotional truth of a scene or character, no matter how outlandish the setting.

Do you have any stories in the works? Can you give us a teaser?

I have a Dropbox full of stories I've run into the wall or had to leave half finished, both fanfic and o-fic. No teasers, because at this point I don't think they will ever see the light of day. Never say never, but the light of hope is dim.

Any words of encouragement to other writers?

Anyone can write and everyone has something to say. Be open to the process. Part of that process involves having a stranger tell you that your shiny new love is really shit. Being defensive only prolongs your shittiness. Embrace criticism. Sometimes,  the process of justifying something can actually buttress your choice, so you double down with better results. Other times, you'll see your idea wasn't working after all. Be ruthless in your editing, but don't delete. That scene you cut because it caused everything to go off the rails could be a different story trying to get out. Take that leap, you fail at everything you don't try, so why not try something you really want?

Thanks so much for giving us your time.

It's been my pleasure.  Thank you for the opportunity.  *waves to my readers*

[themagiciansreccenter]

Author Spotlight: AlexxAplin

Every week we interview a writer from The Magicians fandom. If you would like to be interviewed or you want to nominate a writer, get in touch via our ask box.

First things first, tell us a little about yourself.

I am a gay, 25 year old who loves most things entertainment related, from gaming, to TV and Film. I'm an Entertainment Journalist by trade, and I write (and roleplay) in my spare time as well, mostly because my creative energy can't be contained by just articles alone.

How long have you been writing for?

That is quite a hard question. Technically I've been writing various things since I was 13, but I didn't really get into Roleplaying or Fandom writing until I was about 16, so...almost 10 years?

What inspired you to start writing for The Magicians?

That is a tough question, but I think I can answer it fairly concisely by saying that Prior to 4x13, I had written mostly with a few people that weren't REALLY fans, but were humoring me lol. After the finale, I was very upset and aimless, until I met a group of like-minded people on Discord, who not only encouraged me and supported my ideas, but also decided to write with me too (a few of them anyhow :) )

Who is/are your favourite character(s) to write? What it is about them that makes them your favourite?

I absolutely LOVE writing Q. I identify him pretty well, and I enjoy playing him a little more...sensual than he is allowed to be in the show or in the books. I think my second favorite (not counting a character i've created and haven't ACTUALLY shared yet) would have to be Eliot, because he is just so much fun in general.

Do you have a preference for a particular season/point in time to write about?

It really depends on my mood honestly. I love doing Fix-its, Canon-Divergent AUs, and anything involving reworking things, or adding new ideas to make things even crazier. My favorite season is Season 3 though, so I need to write more in that timeline context.

Are you working on anything right now? Care to give us an idea about it?

Oh boy, do you have all week? Lol. Uh, right now i'm in the process of editing a fic I wrote with a friend of mine, and I have another collaborative fic (that I worked on with the same Author) that i've got to find time to post.

I also have a fic for the MHHE (Magicians Hallmark Holiday Extravaganza) I'm working on with a friend, and a DOZEN and one other projects that are in progress.

How long is your “to do list”?

Too long to name to be honest, and it keeps growing! I swear my brain is housing these ideas in some flubbery substance.

What is your favourite fic that you’ve written for The Magicians? Why?

I only have two fics up right now, but my favorite fic is one I hope to actually put up on Ao3 either today or tomorrow, called Eau De Spicy Nerd. It is a cheeky little play on a few things, and I can't wait for people to see it.

Many writers have a fic that they are passionate about that doesn’t get the reception from the fandom that they hoped for. Do you have a fic you would like more people to read and appreciate?

I'll be honest, most of my favorite fics are from other people. However, I think of my fics, my "Is that Alright?" Fic (which is currently two standalone chapters but will be expanded soon for a full cohesive story) is an emotional feelings train that I hope more people see and resonate with. Fair warning I have been told it will make you cry.

What is your writing process like? Do you have any traditions or superstitions that you like to stick to when you’re writing?

My writing process is very instinctual. I'm terrible at writing by myself in most cases, because I thrive on interaction, bouncing ideas back and forth, and then just letting things go where they go. As stupid as it may sound, sometimes I feel like the characters are more in control of what lands on the page than I am. I just...feel it. Sometimes I lay awake with scenes playing in my head, that i have to write down or I just can't sleep at all.

I usually write a fic (with a friend usually, minus Is That Alright? and its first two chapters) and then afterward I compile it all in a doc (usually pasted from Discord) and work my way through, adding things that come to mind. I pass it off to any other authors collaborating, then once it is polished it goes on to a Beta.

Do you write while the seasons are airing or do you prefer to wait for hiatus? How does the ongoing development of the canon influence and inspire your writing process?

I am quite literally ALWAYS writing. It keeps me sane, especially when work is hectic. Unless work is taking too much of my focus, i'm always working on things. Canon ACTUALLY has helped me finish things before, or has given me ideas to start new things. Sometimes even the smallest plot thread will spark a full idea for me, for example I had the idea for a full AU verse I haven't started yet, just from a conversation about Fillorian marriage and Polyamory.

What has been the most challenging fic for you to write?

Well, I can't REALLY talk too heavily about it because it is my MHHE fic, but the hardest part for me has been sticking to the prompt and not deviating. Sometimes I have ideas for things that stray too far, and i'm having to learn to NOT do that, since it is for a challenge and not my own enjoyment.

Are there any themes or tropes that you like particularly like to explore in your writing?

I love writing smutty things. I think our society should be more sex positive, and so I often try to make my fics the "NC17" version if possible. Some plots aren't conducive for that, which is fine, but anything with smut, or fluff, is A++ in my book. I also love soulmate AU's, Soul bonding, and lots and lots of cheesy things.

Are there any writers that inspire your work? Fanfiction or otherwise?

Oh goodness, I'm not sure I should call out individual folks here, but I am totally inspired by SO MANY Fanfic writers. I also love Neil Gaiman and Lev Grossman as artists and people. To be honest though I am most inspired by fanfic writers these days, because the world is a scary place and fanfic gives me a break. I've learned so many great techniques from fanfic writers too.

What are you currently reading? Fanfiction or otherwise?

I gobble up as much Magicians fic as I can, usually the fluffy or smutty stuff unless i'm in the mood for tears lol. I also keep up with a few different authors, but these days I don't have as much time to read novels as i'd like.

What is the most valuable piece of writing advice you’ve ever been given?

The best advice I've ever been given is actually two pieces of advice. 1. Never force yourself to finish something your heart isn't in. If you do, you won't be satisfied with the end result. 2. Do not set out to tell the story you planned. Set out to tell a GOOD story you and your readers will love. If you love it, other people will too.

Are there any words or phrases you worry about over using in your work?

Oh there are plenty, most are descriptors for facial expressions. I sometimes find it hard to balance too much detail with not enough detail.

What was the first fanfic that you wrote? Do you still have access to it?

I actually don't remember what my first Fanfic was. I don't think I've posted most of my beginning work. I think the first one was a Queer as Folk fanfic that got lost on an old, dead hard-drive lol.

Rapidfire Round!

Self-edit or Beta?

Both, a good author knows their flaws and also seeks critique.

Comments or Kudos/Reblogs or Likes?

Give it all to me, or whatever makes you feel most comfortable. I'm not fussy, I just want people to enjoy what I write.

Smut, Fluff or Angst?

Smut or Fluff. Angst is reserved for if i'm in the right headspace, i've had...bad experiences.

Quick & Dirty or Slow Burn?

Depends on my mood, some days I don't have the attention span for a slow burn fic, especially if it is incomplete.

Favourite Season?

Season Three

Favourite Episode?

The Musical Episode with Under Pressure. So much of that was AMAZINGLY done.

Favourite Book?

Haven’t read them.

Three favourite words?

Love, Fuck (it fits so many purposes) and Symphony

Want to be interviewed for our author spotlight? Get in touch here.

[nessie-hell-blog]

Coming up with a new character

Hey. I want to write a sci-fi short story in (ideally) two days. I have no idea about who the characters are or what the plot is or what time the story is set in. I had a good experience with planning my novel by just talking to the characters, though, so I’m going to give that a try. I’ll decide on the facts and as soon as I can see the character in my head, I’ll get her here for an interview. I have high expectations. Get to work, fingers!

Name: Cecily Davis

Age: Mid-twenties.

Occupation: Settlement manager. 

Job description: Looking for inhabitable planets and making sure they’re (mostly) safe and planning colonization.

***

Cecily: Hey, what am I doing here? 

Me: Giving an interview. Now-- 

Cecily: What? I don’t have the time. I need to get back before the fleet arrives. 

Me: Stop panicking, geez. What fleet?

Cecily: Who are you? Have you been living under a rock all these centuries?

Me: Centuries? Interesting. What’s the date? 

Cecily: Did you damage your brain? How did you even bring me here? I was on my ship. 

Me: I did a clever thing. Now, hush and answer some questions for me--

Cecily: You’re here to interrogate me? You’re one of the rebels, aren’t you? Torture me all you want, you will never get the information you need. 

Me: Jesus, why do you have to be so hard to work with? Just answer some simple questions and you can leave. 

Cecily: What kind of an idiot do you think I am? 

Me: The paranoid kind.

Cecily: Excuse you, I was just kidnapped and--

Me: Look around, dumbass. Does this look like a torture room to you? 

Cecily: It would be a new level of cruelty to torture me in a boring museum.

Me: Muse--This isn’t a museum. This is my office. 

Cecily: What are you living in, the two-thousands? Yes. Early two-thousands, by the look of it. Very early.

Me: You know the interior decoration styles of the centuries? Why?

Cecily: Well, it’s my job to make sure the newly settled people are comfortable. Sometimes, they make weird requests. 

Me: Interior decorator and something of a historian. Interesting job.

Cecily: What do you want? 

Me: Couple of answers to a few harmless questions.

Cecily: This really isn’t a torture chamber?

Me: No.

Cecily: You have bad taste. Because this could be a rather effective torture chamber. The creepy things on the wall are enough to send any sane person screaming to the hills. 

Me: It’s called wallpaper, and I agree. It was my sister’s choice. She was seven. 

Cecily: Sister?

Me: Yeah. Do you have one? 

Cecily: No. I used to have a brother. 

Me: What happened? 

Cecily: Oh, you know, what always happens to families. He chose a different world. I chose a travelling profession. I haven’t seen him in fifteen years. 

Me: That’s too sad. Do you miss him? 

Cecily: Not really. Most of the time I’m too busy to miss anyone. 

Me: Why did you choose this job?

Cecily: I wanted to travel, and I wanted to help people. This was the only choice where I could happily do both.

Me: Do you love your job?

Cecily: Oh so much. I’ve been on fourteen planets so far. New ground, new sky, whole new world, it never gets old. 

Me: So, what kind of problems do you face on a typical day? 

Cecily: Boredom. On a typical day, we’re just travelling. Strapped to seat for hours while the ship goes into hyperdrive. 

Me: And on other days? 

Cecily: Well, we sometimes face technical issues but those are pretty rare. Predators, radiation, stuff like that on the planet. We have to ensure the place meets Biological Safety Standards for Humans. 

Me: What do you do with the resident life-forms? 

Cecily: Most of the time, nothing at all. The settlements are small. They don’t need much space. We enclose a relatively large area in biosensors that keep the dangerous life forms out. That’s about the extent of it. 

Me: Okay. Interesting. What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?

Cecily: Hard to decide. I usually have galaxies and nebula clusters outside the window. There was this one time I landed on a planet that was always dark. Some sort of natural shield absorbing the photons in the upper atmosphere. I saw the thing through an infrared scanner, and you would not believe how gorgeous the patterns were. It was like--I don’t know how to describe it right. Like I was standing in space and there were these breath-taking, colorful, almost hypnotizing patterns just floating around for as far as the eyes could see. And they weren’t very opaque, so to speak, so I could see for miles in every direction. Honestly that was--that was something else. We couldn’t colonize that one. Long story. But it was one of the best days of my life.

Me: Sounds awesome. 

Cecily: Why are you asking me all this?

Me: What would you rather I ask you? 

Cecily: I don’t know. People usually want me to spill trade secrets or security info.

Me: Not interested. Could you write a book? 

Cecily: Excuse me?

Me: About your experiences. A memoir. Leave out the sensitive info if you like. 

Cecily: Whoever would want to read that? 

Me: Me. I would very much want to read that. But I’d settle for a short story right now. Gimme something thrilling and science-y. Bonus points if the word count is around ten thousand. That seems like a good rounded off number. Lots of zeroes.

Cecily: Thrilling and science-y. Lemme think. 

Me: In your own time. 

Cecily: Well, there was this one time...

And this is where I sign off to go tell her story. I’ll let you guys know if it ever gets published. Tell me, though, would you like to read the memoir of Cecily Davis? Because I’d love to write it, after I’ve finished my current novel. 

So come on, motivate me to finish them both faster. 

[academyeah]

high school tips !

from a rising junior that... sorta slacked and human disaster’d her way through 10th grade so don’t be a me (but i learned a lot of lessons). obviously, it’s case by case (ex: some guidance counselors may be shitty, i’m sorry if that’s the case for you) so obvi take these things with a grain of salt. honestly your one take away from this post should be: do what’s best for you and yes, you can do this. 

notes. write your notes in real-time. meaning that you don’t have to make them super pretty, 1000+ likes and rbs worthy on the spot. you can always re-write and/or re-type them later (and doing so helps with studying and keeping the material fresh in your head!), but when you’re in class, just jot things down in a way that you can understand and condense it later. 

counselors. talk to your guidance counselor. i was so afraid to talk to my counselor because i thought that i would be judged or that it would be like one of those teen drama horror stories where they just don’t understand!1!! but honestly, when i went to my first appointment with mine, i felt so good. your counselor is an impartial adult figure in your life, they’re there for you, not to snitch to your parents/guardians/teachers/friends. 

counselors p2. counselors can also link you up with in-school and out of school resources that are so important (so utilize them, if you can!). for example, i confided in my counselor about my anxiety and certain thoughts that could endanger myself, and importantly about how i felt suffocated by all the pressures in my life. he talked me through options, which included in-school professional counseling (which i never knew about before) and a free community counseling service. he also reminded me that there is no pressure and i can always come to him to talk. you guys, i can’t stress this enough: guidance counselors are godsend. 

novel study. i know sometimes it’s way easier to just use sparknotes or enotes for ISUs/novel studies and the temptation is too real (and sometimes, necessary to give into, depending on priorities and individual grade goals). but honestly, through the “mandatory” reading in my courses, i’ve been introduced to some of the most amazing books that remain my favorites ever! bonus points, if you’re familiar with and enjoying the novel, the teacher will notice, through your responses/projects/etc, so more of a chance to boost that mark!!

two planners. if your school gives you an agenda (like mine does, since our academic set-up is very unique and it even comes with school-specific printables, #studyblr af lol), get another one for personal/other commitments like work, extra curriculars, etc! trust me, it’ll help keep you sane to separate academics and personal life.

study group. i think besides the guidance counselor part, this is the next most important tip: form a study group. i’m not telling you to go assemble your avengers of straight A students, but find people who are committed to a like goal and work hard. for example, my friends and i all abhor math. but we knew we all needed to pass and get the best marks we could, so we met up bi-weekly/once a week to do homework / go over notes / pray to khan academy and generally just help each other out. and we did pass, all of us 80+ averages. 

the experience. i know that this community is embodied by the grind never stops™; we all have big dreams, aspirations, goals, and by all means chase them. this is gonna sound cheesy, but don’t forget to breathe, to drink in the moment, to take the good things as they come. i used to be the kind of person that opted out of school functions because i thought it was cool to skip out and go home/elsewhere but i’m telling you now (and if you have the means to!) go to the dance, watch the game, attend the end of year bbq. HS moves so fast, i feel like i was a niner yesterday and tbh, i still feel like a niner. so enjoy the time you have with your friends and community, don’t take it for granted and have fun!!

[losingsiide-archive-blog]

eyyy so ya boi made it to 200!! i think these are still cool? who knows, i’m not hip with the kids. but i made this blog just a few months ago and hit 100 in a few weeks, and now i’m here. honestly coming back to rp after?? god knows how long?? was one of the few good decisions i’ve made. i mean, granted, i made plenty of bad ones afterwards ( skipping class to talk about headcanons, writing 2500+ words in a little under an hour, like 90% of the stuff that makes me cool ) but it was well worth it. i came into the sherlock rp community cautiously, honestly expecting to leave within two weeks, but i’ve made some really good friends who are incredibly important to me. i love them a lot you guys.

RAIN MARS INSERT SHITTY JOKE HERE,

so. i’ve talked about kacie a thousand times, i know i don’t have to. you guys know how much i love her. but i say it because it’s important. kacie and i built a friendship off of loving each other and rolling our eyes at everyone else; at the end of the day, she’s who i have. she’s my best friend, my soulmate, my partner in far too many bad decisions but all of my good ones, the only person who call my on my bullshit and encourages me to be my saltiest self in the same breath. for three years, i’ve gotten nothing but love and support from her. so please excuse my outward affection, all the appreciation posts, all the replies on her munday photos and every ooc post, how i yell about rain to people who don’t even know who kacie is, i’m just trying to make up for three years of her doing the same for me. nobody else can make me laugh like she does, the kind that leaves me gasping for air and smiling so hard my entire face hurts, and nobody else can make me go from angry and annoyed and frustrated to flopping over onto my bed and pressing my face into a pillow because her anger at whatever is bothering me, no matter how small or how little she knows about it, makes my chest hurt from all the love. so just, like, let me have this. even though she’s gonna read this and call me gay, and i’ll tell her i’m just gay for her, and she’ll send me a heart and i’ll send her one and know i made her smile, and that will be enough // @fxrechild​

MY ENGLAND MOM, MARTHA,

i guess i should probably start at the beginning. sophie was my first friend in the fandom. my rp blogs don’t last long without partners to write with. i get bored easily. so to everyone who likes my blog, everyone i met after sophie, you have her to thank for my being here. sophie let me rant to her about headcanons i had barely developed, back when i had even less of a grasp on sherlock than i do now. she was my rp partner, and then somewhere along the way she became a lot more than that. she’s a teacher. if there’s one thing i’ve learned in all my years, all sixteen of them ( guys help i’m so old ), it’s that teachers are very much born. it’s not an occupation, it’s a type of person. sophie just happens to be employed as a teacher as well as being one. i know i’m not making sense so let me explain: few people are capable of the warmth that sophie displays, and even fewer are capable of directing it towards someone so far away, and then, once you have that, you have to actually be able to teach something. for sophie, it’s how to care. sophie is, without a doubt, the first person i think of when someone says compassion or kindness or love. she’s there for me when i’m anxious, sad, upset, but she’s there for the good times too, for all the smiles and the laughter, and she never misses a beat. i said once that she was family and that still stands. some people are just too important to simply say ‘friend’ // @adler-thewoman​

MY ANGST QUEEN SUPREME,

i’m half-tempted to leave it at that, actually. i swear, allison has made cry as many times as she’s made me smile. allison is incredibly involved in her character. she understands abigail in a way that shocks me every day, but it makes her wonderful to talk to. her dedication to her character is, in short, absolutely beautiful to see. allison is absolutely beautiful to see in general. she’s chill as hell, which is great for days when i’m too tired to do much else but talk about sherlock and abigail being cute together. she doesn’t get nearly enough sleep but that’s okay; it means she’s always awake when i need her. allison is, in every respect, one of the best listeners i have ever had the pleasure of being friends with. whether it’s long-winded headcanons about our muses or just my irl problems, she’s here, ready to talk. and when i need time alone, she understands. i can’t explain how important that is. being able to listen, to understand, these are skills i’ve struggled with my whole life and allison makes it look easy. when i’ve had a long day and i want quiet, chill time, she’s who i go to. my gratitude for her patience and time can’t be expressed in words // @suumuxor​

MY ACTUAL IRL ANGEL,

i don’t actually write with jack all that much. jack isn’t someone i have to write with to maintain our friendship. there’s genuine affection here. when i come home, when i’m sad, when i wake up, he’s the person i go to. i couldn’t tell you why to save my life. i’ve tried a thousand times, written jack novels about why he means so much to me, but it’s the kind of thing i can’t put into words. but i’ll try one more time. half the time he’s making a joke, the other half he’s being one of the most affectionate people i’ve ever met. i can’t think of what i could have done to earn his singular love, so i assume he’s like that with everyone. as funny as he is, as much as he makes me laugh and roll my eyes in equal measure, it’s that ridiculously thoughtful, caring part that fascinates me. i still haven’t quite figured jack out, but i’m gonna. i guess until then, that’s my excuse to keep talking to him // @psychopatx

MY PERSONAL RAY OF SUNSHINE,

every day i call her my sunshine and every day she tells me i’m wrong. i wonder when she’s gonna figure out that i’ve never been so right about anything. zoe is an amazing person. incredibly strong and determined, intelligent as hell and passionate about what she does. she loves mary like i love her, and that’s saying a lot. even without knowing i’m in a bad mood or in a bad place, she cheers me up, and has never failed to do so. being around her is like being outside in the perfect weather in your favorite place. it’s impossible to not feel better when you talk to her. she’s such a beautiful person, insanely caring and always ready to help her friends. she cares so deeply for the people she chooses to surround herself with, and never fails to make me feel loved, which is hard to do. if i can be half of what she is to me, i’ll consider myself a success // @traiinedassassiin

&& MY PARTNER IN MY SLOW DESCENT TO HELL.

sometimes michelle is indistinguishable from john watson. i haven’t told her this yet, but sometimes she says things or does things and i sit back and wonder if that’s why she’s so good at writing him. here’s the thing about john watson: sherlock pulls a lot of bullshit. he does a lot of stupid things, he’s a ridiculous man with mood swings like hell, but john puts up with it. not only does he put up with it, he loves sherlock. and that’s a lot like michelle. i do a lot of ridiculous things. i get anxious for no reason, sad over small things, i have mood swings like hell, but michelle is right there. always calm, always telling me to talk to her about it instead of letting it get all bottled up. michelle is balancing on that thin line between caring and commanding, which can really throw me off sometimes when she tells me to talk to her and yes, i want to, but she’s also very hard to say no to in general. so maybe that’s why i keep writing sin and further cementing my place in hell. it’s here i have to point out that while writing this, michelle saw fit to send me absolute filth from a johnlock fic, so she’s going down with me. but back to my point. michelle is the most patient person i have met. she deals with me at my worst and somehow comes out of it still sane and wanting me around, and i don’t quite think i can express how important that is to me // @julietthotelwhiskey

and a note from the author. i have argued and will continue to argue that roleplaying is about one thing: people. it’s people who like writing, yes, but it’s people. we’ve all fallen into this odd little hobby together, so we may as well make friends. my bias list is short because it’s honest; the people above are people i genuinely care about, and i will continue caring about them as long as they allow me to, or as long as i am meant to, whichever comes last. i have five ( yeah, fuck kacie ) IM conversations open right now. little icons on the side of my dash and i can’t tell you how big my smile is when one of my friends messages me. so let yourself make ridiculously close friends through this dumb little hobby, because knowing that someone cares about you for you is one of the most rewarding things in life, far better than having good graphics or formatting or hell, even being the best writer.

that’s all, folks. <3

[naomi-l-tiessen-blog]

Tips on Staying [Relatively] Sane While Writing

Hellllooooooo Everybody ~

Happy Thursday Blogday!

Let’s face it: we’ve all been there, where at some point or another, writing stops being fun. Writing is our calling; we were born on this cynical planet to tell stories. It’s been written into our DNA, it’s our passion, it’s the reason Why. We. Breathe.

And it’s stopped being fun. In fact, it’s driving us a little batty.

*Le Gasp!!*

Cue the world ending.

Don’t worry. It happens to the best of us. It’s common to fall in and out of love with writing, especially considering we should be treating it like a job, and who doesn’t fall in and out of love with their job? Or, better yet, upgrade and develop a love-hate relationship with it altogether? It’s perfectly normal for your life passion to make you seriously question your sanity. And really, Lord knows it doesn’t matter if that passion is a hobby or a profession; insanity is completely inclusive and knows no boundaries. Honestly, you should watch me play video games; as much as I love them, I’m generally a mess when I play.

I know we all like to think that we are tough as nails and have nerves of steel, but the truth of the matter is this: we are human. We are fragile sometimes. And sometimes, SOMETIMES, our mental game isn’t exactly top notch. And while this might not seem like a big deal, not being 100% in the mental health department can lead to other things, like other health issues, insomnia, poor eating habits, increased hermitage, poor writing, or worse, NO writing.

Ok, NOW cue the world ending.

So, before you toss in the towel and seriously consider a new passion, let me settle your worried soul and offer 10 tips on how to salvage the last bits of your already fragile mental psyche. Some of these may work for you, and some of them may not. Some of them won’t be very nice to hear (you’ve been warned; the faint of heart should avert ye eyes), but are important nonetheless.

Without further ado, 10 tips on how to stay [relatively] sane while writing:

1) Take a break. This one is important, guys. When was the last time you got up, stretched, and focused on something besides your computer screen? Sometimes when we are so focused on our work, we forget that we have a body…a human body…and those things have needs! We ignore the signs our bodies are throwing at us, like muscle aches, eye strain, hunger pains, headaches, and full bladders. Trust me, your work isn’t going anywhere. You can afford a 5-minute pee break. It’ll all be there when you get back. And if it isn’t…well…I blame the wizards.

2) Make a schedule for yourself. Set alarms to remind yourself to take breaks, to eat, to do something that isn’t writing-oriented. Maybe instead of saying, “I will write today!” start with smaller, less vague goals. “I will write 500 words, take a 10-minute break, and then write another 500 words.” This goal is a lot more specific, is well-structured, has a beginning and end, and is easily attainable! Make it a habit to start each writing session with a routine so you know which direction you are heading in; going head-first into a session without an end-goal often leads to procrastination, frustration, and disappointment.

3) Switch it up. If the routine you are currently stuck in feels more like a rut than anything, perhaps it’s time to develop a new ritual. Try something different. Leave the house. Listen to a different playlist. Play around with a couple writing exercises to get the ideas flowing. Write in a group if you normally hermit it up (and vice versa, if you are on the more social side). Pick apart your routine and see what is working, and what isn’t. It’s amazing to see the sorts of things that might be helping alleviate your stress, and what might be exacerbating it.  

4) Reward yourself. When you meet a goal, celebrate! Eat that candy, take a breather to watch that movie, go to the bookstore and buy that book you’ve been eyeing up. Allowing yourself those little treats is a great way to lighten the mood, offer momentary distraction, and reinforce further positive behavior. Think of it like this. If you are training your puppy to go to the front door when it needs to pee, you are going to offer positive feedback when it does the task you want it to do. Your puppy is then going to associate doing the right thing with something good (ie: praise, cuddles, and/or treats). The same thing goes for you (except, for the love of God, I hope you’re potty trained). When you set goals for yourself, reach them, and reward yourself accordingly, your brain is going to start associating positive experiences with hard word and hitting goals. This helps you focus less on stress and more on how well you are doing, or how much work you’re getting done. It’s all about perspective, you see. Positive reinforcement is key to a healthy you and a healthy me!

5) Accept defeat. Ok, I KNOW this is like a punch in the throat, and I’m not trying to be Negative Nelly over here, but this is an honest-to-goodness tip, Scouts Honor. When I say, “accept defeat,” I’m not saying toss all your hard work away the moment you hit a wall and all the rainbows and butterflies are gone. I’m saying that if you’ve been struggling with your novel baby for a solid chunk of time (I’m talking months-years here), you’ve lost your passion for it, and you are generally experiencing more anger than joy when it comes to sitting down at your computer and opening up your work, then you might want to consider either 1) setting that WIP aside and focusing on something else, or 2) getting rid of that WIP altogether. Now, keep in mind that this is only for absolutely dire, worst-case-scenario ordeals. But sometimes, it’s good to know when to call a spade a spade and to call it quits. I highly recommend putting a lot of thought into this, as well as making the decision with a clear, objective mind. Because, let’s face it, this is a huge deal, and letting your emotions get in the way might not be the best idea. But sometimes, you’d be amazed at how much lighter you feel after agreeing to drop a story. I’ve done it before, and as sad as it is to say goodbye, the lack of mental stress, guilt, and burden was enough to convince me that I made the right choice.

6) Get support/have a soundboard. A good vent session is a beautiful thing. And it’s even better when it’s not with your fur baby. For me, besides the raging headache I get, I often feel 10x lighter, more energetic, and more balanced after a good sob-fest/yelling session. While the soundboard can essentially be anyone, it helps if they have a writer’s brain like you; they know the struggles you are going through inside and out, and can offer constructive feedback and advice that doesn’t make you want to start throwing out punches like a kung-fu master. But the most important thing is knowing you aren’t alone in these problems. People have gone through EXACTLY what you are going through. They’ve been on the verge of snapping a time or two as well; what you are experiencing is not special, nor is it exclusive to solely you. People are suffering together! Hooray!

7) Journal your progress. Now, I know that sometimes journaling is the last thing people want to do, especially if writing is what they are already doing all day, not to mention if it is writing that is causing them such mental strain. But I find that if I journal my progress, even if it’s a couple sentences here and there, it helps me debrief and vent. This tip is especially handy if you don’t have the best support systems in place, or a soundboard to fall back on. Besides, sometimes we just need to rage-write our hearts out without fear of getting judged, interrupted, and overwhelmed with awful advice. Just as well, I find that journaling also helps me remain focused and on track. I can see how far I’ve come, how much I’ve grown, and I’m reminded that I’m a lot stronger now than I was before. It’s very grounding.

8) Listen to music. Some people prefer to write in silence, and that’s totally fine! However, unless I’m really in The Zone, I find that my thoughts go way faster than my fingers, and in the end, I get too stressed to even function. My subconscious gets the better of me, and in the end, my work, and my mental health, suffers because of it. Therefore, often I turn to music to help keep my mind chatter to a minimum, and to keep my focus sharp. Music is awesome that way; there is a unique type for every sort of mood you are feeling. If you need something relaxing, there’s a playlist for that. If you need hardcore screamo, there’s a playlist for that. If you need orchestral, or lyrical, or dubstep, or chillstep, there is a freaking playlist for that. Music is incredibly influential, and often I find that my mood mirrors whatever I’m listening to. Using music to impact and manipulate your writing is a great way to push past blocks, fears, and crippling doubt. Need a confidence booster? I’ll bet there’s a playlist for that.

9) EAT. Seriously. When was the last time you fed your body? And no, I don’t mean with ichiban noodles, nutrigrain bars, and candy. When was the last time you put ACTUAL food into your belly? AKA protein, nutrients, healthy sugars, and non-lethal doses of sodium? When was the last time you drank something besides coffee and energy drinks? If you honestly can’t remember, stop reading this blog, go and grab a cup of water, and don’t sit back down till you drank it all. I mean it.

10) You are going to hate me for this, but exercise. Notice how I left this as the last tip…because it is honestly the last damn resort, the “worst case scenario”, the Plan Z. I’m not a fan of exercise on the best of days, but sometimes, if you are hitting that writer’s block for the umpteenth time, and the end is nowhere in sight, and your frustration is building so high up that it’s about to cave in on itself, then maybe stepping away from the danger zone and getting fresh air IS actually a good idea. Stop breathing in recycled air, and go out to where the elements are not man-made. Get the blood flowing, the heart pumping, and blast that music so loud that thinking about your book is next to impossible. Give your brain a moment to think about something else. Trust me, it’s not cheating to place your attention elsewhere for a couple seconds.  

And there you have it! 10 tips to help you not rip out your hair and ram pencils into your eyeballs. Like I said before, not all these will work for you, nor should they (don’t forget, #5 is only in absolutely dire circumstances). During your writing hours, take time to introduce a couple of these into your schedule, and practice them till you find a groove that works well for you. I know your life is already busy, but trust me, your psyche will thank you in the long run!

With that said, I post new blogs (and vlogs, apparently) every Thursday, and if there is anything you’d like me to discuss, feel free to message me on here, or tweet me @ScarletteStone

Until next time,

Happy Writing!

[commandervisor]

whats good dorter now do swr for that meme

the first character i ever fell in love with: Agent Kallus. It was either the promo video or the actual pilot episode itself, but in all likelihood, the sideburns were probably involved somehow. If anything, I will say that the second character is Tua, the moment she stepped into the shuttle way back in DoD. Like, yo.

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: Darth Maul. But his usage of his EXPERIMENT 2000 DEGREE KNIFE on Kanan’s eyes, Ezra’s innocence, but most importantly, the Inquisition, is the last straw.

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: Kanan/Seventh, since FPJ and SMG are married, yeah. Didn’t last long, since now it’s Fifth/Seventh and I don’t particularly trust a majority of the fanbase anymore to make legible, sane, and legal fanwork where Kanan isn’t in a relationship with Hera/where Seventh is in a relationship at all. Yikes.

my ultimate favorite character™: don’t make me choose

prettiest character: All the female characters look good, and as for the ‘handsome’ kind of pretty, Kallus, Kanan, and the prettiest Lasat in the Galaxy.

my most hated character: Kind of hard to like the I/r/o/n Squadron, since their episode had poor characterization for them, building solely off of them being S1 Ezra clones. They could definitely improve though! And I do have a few headcanons on what they’ve been up to since that episode.

* And I definitely LOVE Zeb, that’s why I hate how they keep… ‘minimizing’ him? Like in “Warhead”, as funny as it was, I didn’t like that the crew and the others were like 'woah you can think?’, 'that was actually very smart of you!’, 'ugh can’t you take charge of the base for one day without trouble’, etc. The writers are obviously trying to show us that Zeb is much more than muscle, but c'mon, really? This kind of stuff is how you treat the audience like they’re goldfish as well as disrespecting the character. Instead of conveying the message that 'Zeb is both smart and strong!’, it comes off more as 'Zeb is strong, but secretly smart!’ or something condescending like that.

my OTP: Mallus, yeah yeah yeah whatever

my NOTP: S/a/b/3/z/r/a, it seems clear to be that they’re just supposed to be like brother and sister. I don’t like a majority of the shippers because they seem to be missing the point (like I remember reading the comments of a clip of where Sabine hug-grabs Ezra in the jetpack chase scene and 90% of it was full of shippers that I swear couldn’t have been older than 12.), but I will say that I like some of the fanart.

favorite episode: “Droids In Distress” (I don’t know, I just watched it a lot back then; in hindsight, I’d say it was a good start to the show), “Empire Day”, “The Honorable Ones”, “The Forgotten Droid” (again, I don’t know, I just liked AP’s and Chopper’s dynamic), “An Inside Man”, “Trials of the Darksaber”, I can safely say “Through Imperial Eyes” because Kallus rests in pepperoni. 😎

saddest death: Hearing Tua died in tSoL way back during Celebration 2015 hit me pretty hard, actually.

favorite season: Season 1 + parts of Season 3, mainly the latter half so far.

least favorite season: Season 2 + the timeskip/transition to Season 3, because it felt like it was rushed; there’s a disconnect between the episodes, especially in the latter half (I suspect it’s due to the writers still being in a TCW mindset, where arcs with completely different stories happened one after the other — not that I’m saying that it’s okay for the writers to do, especially because their intent is obviously for SWR to be in a different format. It’s just that I can see why it happened and I hope that at this point in time, they can at least learn from their mistakes…).

So because of that, new information and the problems are just rapid-fire out of pretty much nowhere instead of foreshadowed or anything like that as well as being solved in a flash, like:

* Hera’s some years of father-daughter estrangement with Cham are dealt with in one episode.* The Inquisitors should’ve done more to build up their credibility, like I thought Seventh was gonna be a rival to Kanan and challenge him as a master to Ezra, but I guess that got given to Maul in the S2 finale.* Fifth is apparently blind, but they didn’t do nothing with that, they could’ve foreshadowed something about it with Kanan, and they also seemed like he was gonna be Seventh’s rival or something (at the time, I imagined it like Ventress and Grievous during TCW), but he ended up just being her lackey.* But no, and then everyone in-universe was like 'eh’, so that ended up being reciprocated by the audience as well.* Also, while we’re on that topic, as 'memetic’ as it was, helisabers really did worsen their credibility than it already was.* I honestly was kind of on the fence about Sabine for a while, since I didn’t like that nothing at least semi-permanently bad happened to her until Season 3 and I just generally don’t like haughty characters that don’t seem to struggle.* Kallus being smug for like the first half of tHO like he’s always been up to that point, and then when he tells his backstory, that attitude is GONE for the rest of the show and then we don’t even get to see the transition from him as a loyal and ruthless Imperial that seemed to enjoy the hunt, to someone who is about the exact opposite.* Ezra’s storyline suffers from something similar, like it looked like it was going somewhere with obsessing with the Sith Holocron and/or doing much more questionable things, but that only gets touched upon in SoS because all of it already happened during the timeskip, so by the time we see Ezra, it’s instead just an excuse for the writers to start having him do more action-y stuff and be problematic (like tWJ).

I like most of the ideas behind them, it’s just that there’s definitely much more to be desired out of them. Yeah, I guess they could do a novel/short story/whatever about these things like the timeskip developments, but that seems kind of sloppy, telling the explanation afterwards instead of showing it when it was the most relevant. I want the writers to respect their characters (and therefore, us) more. It’s certainly possible to do, but it’s not constant; it just comes and goes, as seen here and in TCW.

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: I definitely like/love Chopper, but the memes about him being a Dark Lord or a Darth undercover or whatever are being run into the ground.

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: Agent Kallus, Governor Pryce. Inquisitors technically didn’t make the choice to be this way, so I didn’t count them here.

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: the Inquisitors. And Tua.

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: Mallus, Fifth/Seventh, yeah.

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: Kanera.

[forlawfirmsonlymarketing]

15 Ideas for Relieving Stress During Coronavirus Quarantine via @searchmastergen

We’re certainly living in strange times. While a global pandemic sweeps through our nation – and across the world – there is plenty to feel stressed about. People are losing their jobs. Parents are forced to find a way to have their child taken care of in response to mandatory school closing. Most terrifyingly, the weak and elderly – our grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, in-laws, and lifelong friends – are all very much at risk of being gravely affected by COVID-19, the novel coronavirus. Oh, yeah. We’re all confined to our homes for the most part, too. There is no shortage of stress-inducing realities that we are all facing, and it’s looking like this will be the case for the foreseeable future, at the very least. So, it’s time to explore some easy stress relievers while we are locked in our homes with limited human contact in an effort to keep our shit together, our attitudes positive, and our outlook on each day better than the day before.

Stress Relievers in Times of High Anxiety

There are the easy answers:

Home workouts.

Reading good books.

Walks outside in fresh air (while keeping your minimum 6-foot distance from others).

Online shopping.

These are some of the more common alternatives to losing your mind on accelerate. And they make sense. Working out is scientifically proven to naturally reduce stress through the release of endorphins and other chemical responses. Reading helps get the creative juices flowing. Fresh air is always good for the mind and body, too. But what about some other basic, not-so-common outlets for stress and anxiety in these strange times?

1. Take it Slow

Most important thing for us anxious, oft-worried people is to just take is slow. Deep breaths and relaxation remain unrivaled. But it’s easier said than done. Anyone with real anxiety knows that. Just never turn your back on the basics. The faster we realize we need to gain control to handle what comes at us, the easier everything else becomes. Remember to take it slow and think of the big picture. We’ve made it this far and we’re living in a big world. Appreciate it for what it is. More often than not, everything falls into place.

2. Less Coffee If You’re Like Me Right Now

For the naturally anxious and occasionally uncontrollable personalities, like me, less coffee can be better. I need at least a couple of cups to get going in the morning, especially on Mondays. Also, I have found myself four (or more) cups deep before noon due to working from home – and making coffee by the pot. It’s easy to get overwhelmed and anxious in these uncertain times. But I try to help myself stay grounded by regulating just how much caffeine I put into my body, especially when my total daily movement is at an all-time low. A cup or two is all most of us need for the day. Move onto water at some point. Then keep your focus once you’re awake and working at a pace that works for you. Don’t just keep drinking coffee until you’ve got the shakes and are about to explode. (Yes, I speak from experience!)

3. Take Breaks from Watching the News

We all want to stay up to date on the current situation to ensure we have the facts and know what we can truly expect. But there has to be a saturation point. As a news junkie myself, I typically watch hours of news each day. In these trying times, that’s probably not the healthiest choice. I’ve reduced my news-watching time significantly, mostly saving my viewing for the morning and evening news telecasts only. The mess on Facebook is a much different story. Sure, there can be good information on the social media platform, and it’s usually nice to have that human exposure – albeit virtually – but, we all know far too well, there’s a lot of crap on Facebook, too. Just like we manage our time watching the news, we need to manage our time on platforms like Facebook. Honestly, I have zero interest in having real-life contact with several of my “friends” on Facebook  anytime soon. I also wonder why so many people never paid attention in ninth-grade library class (nor understand credibility, proper sourcing, etc.). No matter how you slice it, we need to manage and regulate our exposure to the outside madness when it comes to the news media and social media platforms.

4. Take a Trip on Foot (With or Without the Dog)

This is an easy one. And it’s a good one. There are a lot of things we are currently not allowed to do. Thankfully, walking outside is not one of them. So long as we keep our 6-foot distance from others, we are more than welcomed to get outside, get some fresh air while we take a quick run or walk the dog, and simply get in touch with the basics of life. Highly recommend.

5. Clean the House

If you’re like me, working in chaos is second nature. But working in a mess is a nightmare. And that, my friends, is one of the biggest dilemmas for working from home, at least for me. I find it hard to get in the zone if I’m sitting among dirty dishes, clothes that need to be put away, and piles of unnecessary toys that my 3-year-old leaves laying around always. So, I pick them up. I’m a lucky one in that cleaning is therapeutic to me. So, this helps in a multitude of ways. But the biggest factor here is the mental satisfaction I get from having a home (and temporary office) that is clean and tidy. It’s just one more way to eliminate unnecessary stress.

6. Talk to Friends & Family

As we now know, social distancing is not easy. It’s a fun joke or punchline when we bail on our friends (maybe even several times) to claim that we just want to be home alone in our pajamas. But being forced to stay in our homes and overthinking everything we touch for the small periods we actually leave (at the grocery store, gas station, bank, etc.) is no way to navigate life. We need to keep communicating with the outside world while we can, too. As mentioned, social networks help with this drastically. But there is plenty of toxicity out there that needs to be waded through as well. I’ve had several meetups with friends and/or coworkers since the 100 percent work-from-home mandate for non-essential employees in New York. And, while I still don’t think I am nearly as pretty as my mom pretended I was growing up (which became even more evident after staring at myself in the webcam during the meetups), this is definitely a fun and unique way to pass the time and stay somewhat normal. Zoom is easy to use, has some fun options for things like virtual backgrounds, and it’s free. We may not see these people (in person) for a couple more weeks, but we can connect with them in some capacity and keep things familiar with relative ease.

7. Start a Journal

As a journalist at heart, this is a no-brainer for me. But, like most of these alternatives, what works for me may not work for others. I’m just trying to provide some ideas; take what you’d like and modify as needed. I typically don’t keep a journal or diary, but when I do revisit old notes from certain periods of my life, I’m always intrigued. To be able to look back at a period of life and recite your thoughts is a strong, impactful way to remember the past. Pictures are great, but written dialogue (especially when written and read by the same person) has incredible power. It also offers some peace of mind and sanity. It’s almost like I’m visiting my shrink through handwriting at home.

8. Meditate

I don’t personally meditate, but many friends and coworkers do, and swear by it. It’s on the list of things I will certainly explore during this strange time. But meditation, along with breathing and mental-awareness exercises, are sure winners as ways to reduce stress by definition.

9. Try Something New

While many of us may be reluctant to break from what we already know we enjoy, now is also an ideal time to try some new things. Many of us will try some new programs on Netflix, maybe teach ourselves a new valuable skill, perhaps even cook up a new dish or two as we explore self-entertaining. It doesn’t hurt to try new things. Some of the new things I plan to do to keep my cool throughout quarantine are meditation, learn some coding skills, and definitely cooking things I never have before. I will be trying some new shows on Netflix, too.

10. Indulge in Satisfaction… But Work Toward It as a Reward

Another big one that seems pretty easy but may be overlooked is rewarding yourself with some of the finer things in life. A lot of us have been joking on social media about how we are going to be fat after this quarantining period is over with. And I’m not saying it’s wrong. Staying sane for the next few weeks may come with a few extra pounds when we are allowed to come out of our houses. I’ll take it. Some of my favorite “rewards” are ice cream, chocolate, Swedish Fish – even non-edibles like video games and other time-out pleasurables that help us feel good but should probably be indulged in at a regulated pace. Some of us also enjoy alcoholic beverages. Nothing wrong with that. I’ve just found it best to keep myself restricted to having my first drink until after 4 p.m. when my workday ends at 5 (officially). That time has since moved up to 3 p.m. over the last two days. The important part is just to keep it righteous and don’t do more harm than good.

11. Catch Up With Yourself & Life

I have long said that I need 36 hours in a day to get even half of the things done I would like to in one day. Life moves fast. I tend to, too. But this mandatory slow-down time – if you’re lucky enough to still have a job, be able to work from home, and are in good health – has allowed me to get a lot of my messy life elements in order. I’ve caught up on my mail. My house is clean. My laundry is done. There is something to be said for having order in life that helps with a positive outlook. And, for work, I am catching up on time-consuming tasks that would otherwise probably not get done anytime soon.

12. Don’t Work on the Same Thing Too Long

I’m extremely productive when I work from home. I also tend to go crazy a lot faster. Something I have found useful is the ability to shift gears regularly, or as needed. Same for when working in the office. If you’re able/don’t mind it, change up gears and put down a 3,000-cell Excel spreadsheet to take on a task or two that are easier. Maybe grab lunch, too. Come back and hammer out the spreadsheet for a couple of hours. Everybody loves a slight change of scenery, especially now.

13. Enjoy a Hobby – Any Way Possible

Face it. We don’t get enough time to enjoy the things we love. Even if we actually do. We’ll say we don’t. That’s why they are the things we love! In this period of social distancing, doing more of what we love is critical. Most of us have hobbies we like but just don’t get to do as much as we’d like. It could be painting, drawing, knitting, writing, reading, making music, or a million other things. Whatever you enjoy and makes you happy is the right answer here.

14. Sharpen Your Skillset

We live in a world where knowledge is very much available, and usually for free. And knowledge is power. Been meaning to teach yourself how to code? How to play the guitar? Learn a new language? Now is the time. There are plenty of free platforms out there to learn code, including Codecademy and a myriad of YouTube resources. Fender is giving away three months of free guitar lessons in this time of quarantine. Duolingo is a dependable easy-to-use free resource for learning a new language, too. Heck, maybe you’ve been meaning to read (and master) Kamasutra. Now’s the time.

15. Create

Weird situations like the coronavirus-created life shutdown are rare, but they’re real. We don’t have much choice in the matter. What we do with our time is important, for our sanity, but also for our production. I can confidently say that I’ve been working more efficiently than usual on my regular day-to-day tasks, but I also feel privileged to be lucky enough to have a job with flexibility, good teammates, and good clients. Outside of my regular eight to 10 hours of work per day, I’ve explored other ways to occupy my time and aren’t coming out of my TV but also help keep the stress down. Working on a book I’ve put on far too long, catching up on old episodes of “Grey’s Anatomy”, and re-organizing my filing cabinet are three things I’ve put time into so far in quarantine, and all have helped regulate my stress.

Do What Works for You

Some things work for some people and others work for other people. The important thing to remember is not everything works the same for everyone. Finding what works well for you is one of, if not the, most important element to keeping your mind right in these times. There are many uncertainties that exist in this unsure time. One thing we all certainly need is to keep our cool. More Resources:

https://www.businesscreatorplus.com/15-ideas-for-relieving-stress-during-coronavirus-quarantine-via-searchmastergen/