#and this shit weights on him he gets worried and anxious and I don't want him to be like that
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annaphoenix1994 · 21 hours ago
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All I See is You
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»»-------¤-------««
"So, how's everything been, Kiera?" Laswell asked as the women sat at a local cafe, catching up on topics other than work. 
She sighed, taking a sip of the glass of water the server brought her, finding the sound of anything else to drink to be nauseating to her as she found herself occasionally taking a bite of her sandwich. "They've been good. Much better since that shit with Shepherd has been dealt with." 
"I agree. With the water settling now, it'll be easier to focus," Laswell nodded. "I think we've earned ourselves a break for a while." 
"Well, speaking of breaks, I was going to talk to you about something," Kiera sighed, finding it rather difficult to tell Laswell, of all people, that she was pregnant and wanting to resign. "Nobody expected this, especially me, but I've been putting a lot of thought behind it..." 
"You're scaring me." Laswell narrowed her eyes, setting aside her drink. 
"As much as I've enjoyed my job, I think it's time I resign. Given everything that's happened, I don't want to risk putting my family in the middle of it again." 
"None of that was your fault-"
"Partially, yeah," Kiera scoffed. "I keep blaming myself. I can't get Fernando's screams out of my head since we found him. I'm not going to put anyone through it again." She explained, frowning and breaking contact with Laswell. 
"Is there something else bothering you?" 
She nodded hesitantly. 
"How far along are you?" 
"H-How did you know?"
"You know as well as I do that the C.I.A burns body language into your brain," Laswell chuckled. "I'm a mother myself. I know that certain glow." 
"I didn't know you had any kids?" 
"I never told anybody because I feared the same thing that you did. I respect your decision, Kiera. I just hate I'm losing one of the best Case Officers that ever stepped foot in our office, but it's not the time to be selfish. Are you nervous?" 
"Very," She breathed. "Simon is beyond excited by how he's been acting. I was afraid he wasn't going to take it well." 
"I can understand that. He's always been hard to read, but he always got straight to the point." 
"That he does." 
"He mentioned flying to London for a military ball, right? When is that coming up?" 
"He said it's on the twentieth of this month. He mentioned flying out on the tenth to spend a few days there before coming home. He wants to take me to his hometown." 
"That'll be nice," Laswell assured her with a smile. "Have you gotten a dress?" 
"I had one picked out, but I don't think I'll fit in it now!" 
"You never did tell me how far along you were," She snickered. "You won't grow twice your size every week." 
"I'm roughly seven weeks, coming up on eight. I go back for another ultrasound the week before we leave for London. Hopefully, she can tell us the gender, but I'm not sure if I want to know." 
"Afraid you'll be disappointed?" Laswell teased. 
"No, I think it would be more special for it to be a surprise. Although Simon wants a boy and I want a girl. I guess a part of my anxious mind wants to keep it a secret until the baby is here so that I can be with Simon as much as possible because I'm afraid he'll leave me if it's a girl." She scoffed, knowing better than to think of Simon that way, her previous relationship being a constant dark reminder of how some men were:
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"I can't have more kids. If you're pregnant, I'm signing my rights over. I don't want nothing to do with it."
"You're mad that I might be pregnant, but yet didn't do anything to prevent it from happening? You know condoms are a thing, right?" 
"Not my job to worry about not getting pregnant. Birth control is a thing too." 
"Yeah, and so is keeping my legs closed," Kiera scoffed. "Oh, but you're always insisting on having sex whenever you feel like it. Condoms don't have the shitty side effects like birth control does. Weight gain, acne, bloating, cramps, everything, Joe. Doesn't hurt wear one." 
"No, you gained weight because you're always eating. Eating too much leads to acne. Cramps are from your period." 
"What's your excuse, then?" Kiera scoffed, arching her brow and nodding her head towards his gut. 
He pursed his lips, "You talk like that to me again, and I'll make sure you're not pregnant." 
"You wouldn't dare." 
"Try me. I'm serious. If you're pregnant I'm out. I'm not going through this again. I already have three." 
"Those poor souls," She scoffed. "But yet when your ex said she might be pregnant you didn't seem too sad about that, huh? You must think I'm stupid if you think I didn't hear you talking to her on the phone when you said you thought you were excited to hear about her being pregnant. Goes to show me that I was just a side piece to you when you did nothing but tell me what I want to hear because you were bored with her and got with someone else." 
"You're full of shit, Kiera. Go take a test. Now." 
"No. You want me to take one so bad, go get one." 
"Oh, so you're not worried about having a kid?" 
"I've always wanted one. If I am, I'm having this baby with or without you - preferably without you because you're acting like a piece of shit. I don't want my baby near that." 
"Fine, I'll go get a test. If it comes back positive, you either get out of my life or I'll go get a hanger." 
Kiera's anger peaked, not hesitating to slap him across his cheek, knowing that he could easily overpower her. "You do that again and my next hit will be to that stomach." 
She hit him again, knowing that he wouldn't do such a thing as her fighting skills have peaked since before they started seeing each other, her other hand balled and ready to fight after she taunted him. "You do that, and I'll kill you," She hissed. "Just fucking leave. You won't change, but I will. I'm not putting myself through this shit." 
"Good luck finding someone better." 
"Fuck, I can go across the street and find someone better. Anyone is better than you. Threatening to kill a life possibly inside of me? That's not a man, you're just an overgrown teenager."
"Is that really what you think of me?" 
"Oh, no, what I think of you is way worse than what I've said, but I figured I'd refrain from hurting your ego." 
He scoffed, stepping closer to her, using his height in a pathetic attempt to intimidate her, "Try me." 
"Now that you mention it, I will gladly begin," She scoffed sarcastically. "First of all, you can't expect to not brush your teeth and your breath smell good. And no, cigarettes won't mask it. Two, you can't say you give good head when, in fact, you don't-"
"You weren't saying that weeks ago." 
"Just like I also didn't say I had to finish myself off because you didn't last long. Don't get too hurt yet, I'm not done," She scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Three, you can't walk around like you're ten foot tall and bulletproof when you're just as tall as me."
"Yeah, you're just as tall as me and just as fat." He retorted, aiming to hurt her composure as he knew her weight was something that she always frowned upon. 
What he didn't expect, though, was an immediate ego check. 
"Yeah? Well let me tell you something. I can control my weight. Until you can control your receding hairline, height, and dick size, then you can have a say in how you think I'm supposed to look. Considering you can't change those things about yourself, I suggest you shut the fuck up."
His anger peaked, pursing his lips and attempting to grab her throat only to find her shin pinning against his groin in a swift kick, making him drop to his knees to clutch himself. He didn't know much, nor care, about Kiera's career, unaware that she was elite in hand-to -hand combat and having fought off several men on her last deployment. 
She swore to keep her "military mode" on base, but in her situation, she couldn't help herself not to. He winced, hearing her scoff, "Didn't figure I'd get a reaction out of you with that little tic-tac between your legs," She began to interrogate. "When you can make yourself get up, I suggest that you quickly leave my house before I make you." 
"Yeah? You couldn't even lift me-"
"There's more than one way to skin a cat, Joe. I'll either make you leave, or call someone to come and get you." She warned. He nodded, catching his breath before using the counter to help him stand to his feet and pull his keys out of his pocket. "I suggest you don't come back. This is over." 
"Saved me from saying it. I pity the man who thinks he wants you." 
"I do, too, but I know the red flags to look out for, so I doubt it'll ever happen again." 
»»-------¤-------««
Kiera recalled the event like it was yesterday, immediately frowning as the altercation was emotionally tragic, especially gnawing at her with every positive thought Simon would put into her head, her trauma telling her that it wasn't true. She felt his love he effortlessly gave her, but she also wondered when he'd get bored... just like every other guy I've dated. They get bored when the spark is out, she thought, frowning as her fingers fumbled with the hem of her blouse. He'll get bored when I don't have the body I used to have when we met - when I'm stretched and scarred with saggy tits and more cellulite. He'll find someone better. 
Her raging hormones weren't helping her negative thoughts, either. Unaware that she found herself crying - sobbing - uncontrollably in public with Laswell staring at her in shock, never seeing Kiera cry before. "Kiera? What's wrong?" Laswell asked frantically, moving to sit across the table to sit next to her, Kiera's elbows resting on the table as she hid her face in her hands. "Are you afraid he's going to leave?" 
She sobbed, nodding. 
"I doubt he will, honey. That man is head over heels for you." 
"Yeah, for now. He won't see me the same after I have this baby. He'll get bored of my body and want to see someone else who doesn't have stretch marks, saggy boobs and cellulite. What if I don't have a boy? He'll probably leave after that, too - finding someone else who either already has a boy or to get another girl pregnant because I'm all used up." 
"Listen to yourself, Kiera. You're talking nonsense. I know your hormones are going crazy right now, but you can't let what happened with Joe talk you out of a healthy relationship." 
"You even said yourself that all men are shit." Kiera scoffed. 
"Yeah, but I'm also married to a woman," Laswell giggled, easing the tension and patting Kiera's shoulder. "I haven't known Simon for long, but I do know that he's very loyal and honest. He's been one of the most loyal soldiers I've ever seen. It's funny because when I see him with you or hear him talk about you, it's like I can't imagine him in that mask he wore on tasks. It's like two different people." 
"I didn't expect it either, so it's fine." Kiera huffed, wiping her tears from her cheeks. 
Aside from her own mother, Laswell was like a second - more stern - mother to Kiera - knowing her as well as a mother should. Knowing when she was upset, angry, heartbroken, and most of all - relentless. Laswell always compared Kiera to a force of nature when she was on the field, executing her authority on many levels, giving Laswell the confidence to send Kiera anywhere on the planet, knowing she'd get the job done and leave no trace. 
"I know it's easier said than done, but don't let your assumptions break your heart. Simon hasn't given you a reason to want to leave, has he?" 
"No, but he's still in the I think I'm in love stage," She doubted herself again, letting her traumatic experiences speak for her. "He treats me better than I deserve and I feel like I can't return the favor." 
"I know he's in love, Kiera."
"For now-"
"Stop it. Right now," Laswell scolded her, the woman's motherly instincts kicking in. "That man loves you, Kiera. When you were in the hospital after what happened in Chicago, he stayed in that waiting room for hours just waiting to get to see you. He didn't eat until I had to bring him something the next morning. When he did, he hardly ever left your bedside unless it was to give room to the nurses or to shower. Believe me, I walked in to check on you every chance I could along with Price. He didn't leave unless you did. When those doctors were dressing your wounds and changing your bandages, he wanted to learn too so that he could do it himself when you got back home. There was no way in hell me or Price could've talked him out of it and you know how devoted he is to his country," She continued, raising her brows as she spoke sense into her. "I bet you could call him right now and say you were hurting and he'd be heading this way. I wish you'd let yourself just give in and be happy. You deserve it, but you're making it seem like you're expecting the worst when you really have the best thing every woman wants." 
»»-------¤-------««
"What about this one?" Simon asked Eva, pointing down at a gorgeous diamond ring that was being shown in the case. 
"What do you think, dear? They're all beautiful, but do you think it suits her?" 
He thought hard on it, trying to picture it on her finger before he shook his head, "She'll probably think it's too big," He chuckled. "She's always been a simple person." 
"That she is," Eva giggled at the thought, separating from him a few steps before looking down at another ring that spoke volumes to Kiera's taste. It wasn't bulky nor too slender. A silver diamond ring with a princess cut and decorative diamonds along the silver band. "Look at this one, Simon." 
"That's gorgeous," He huffed, perfectly imagining how it would complement that pretty finger of hers. "I'll probably come back to that one, but I'm going to look around some more before I decide." 
He completely ignored the price tag... Eva thought as she watched him continue to look through the gallery, taking time in each ring he thought would be a good fit. "You look like you're pondering on asking the big question." An employee smiled at him from the other side of the case. 
"Oh, I'm done pondering - I've already decided. Now I'm just doing the hard part on finding the perfect one." 
"I'll be glad to help you with that if you'd like?" The woman asked, visibly too cheerful to assist him. Are all women like this? He thought to himself, wondering if he was really that attractive or if she was just browsing herself for a man. Seeing that she had no ring on her finger, Simon assumed that was why she was so adamant. Or she's just doing her job. 
"You know more about it than I do," He chuckled anxiously, hating having to ask someone for assistance. "There's a few in here that I like, but I keep being drawn back to one and I don't know if she'd like it or not. I want it to be special for her." 
The employee smiled, adjusting her weight on her heels before splaying her hands on the case, a pathetic attempt at showing Simon that she wasn't taken if he wanted to keep shopping. "I'll be glad to help. What's her name?" 
"Kiera." 
"Beautiful name," She smiled. "Do you have a photo of her by chance? Don't worry, I do this with every expecting fiancé so I can help with rings that complement their lifestyle." 
Sure you do, Simon scoffed to himself. Prying isn't going to open up a door for you, lass.
He pulled his phone from his pocket and set it on the case, tapping on the screen once for his favorite wallpaper to appear in front of the woman's eyes - the photo he took of her recently when they went on a date by the river. 
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Oh, I know her...
He watched how the woman made a furrowed expression, "I love the dress." She forced the compliment.
"I do, too." He said sternly. 
"I can see that," She nodded, glancing at Kiera's mother as she approached Simon's side.
"I have a few that are in the size you're probably wanting. What's your budget?" 
"I'm not worried about that."
"Oh, okay," She nearly gasped, never truly hearing that before. "You mentioned you had a ring in mind already? Which one were you looking at?" 
"It was style 68843," Eva answered, knowing Simon didn't look at the number nor the price tag. With a giggle, she watched Simon nod at the employee before she waltzed off to find the style number, taking a few moments before she returned to her new customer with the ring between her thumb and index finger, easily setting it in Simon's hand as he looked at it closer. 
"Bloody perfect, yeah?" He asked Eva, letting her take a closer look herself as she nodded in approval. 
"She'll love it, dear. It definitely looks like something she'd wear." 
"I think so, too. What size is this one?" 
"Um..." The employee hummed before reaching for the tag, the tip of her acrylic nail scraping his thumb subtly as she turned the tag to look. "This one is a six." 
"That's just her size, Simon." 
"She must have some tiny fingers," The clerk giggled. "Don't have many women come in with that size." 
"Her hands are very small," Simon agreed, chuckling at the thought of how small they were in his hands. "I didn't realize how small she was because I'm twice her size," He continued, looking at the diameter of the band and comparing it mentally to the size of his fingers, concluding that if he were to truly compare, his pinky finger would probably be the closest to her ring finger size. "Tiny feet, tiny ears, tiny nose..." And a tiny baby in that perfect belly, he thought, thankful that he didn't mention it in front of her mother...again. 
You wouldn't be wanting to marry her if you would've seen how big she was in high school, the clerk thought negatively. Being one of Kiera's former bullies in school, she would never admit that she was jealous. Especially seeing the man before her that was wanting to ask the big question. God, you're so tall...
"Well, I think this one would be perfect with the picture you showed me. It looks like it would suit her well."
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Simon took notice of the clerk's jealousy, taking the perfect opportunity to continue talking about Kiera to piss her off, pleased at how he could shut the door of any hope the woman had towards him by making it clear that he wasn't interested. "I think it would, too. She deserves the world." 
"I think we've found the perfect one?" Eva suggested, taking another look to satisfy her curiosity. 
"I think so," Simon nodded. "I want this one." 
"Okay," She smiled, forcing her jealousy from her mind by keeping her gaze towards the floor to keep from looking at him. "If you'll just follow me over here, I'll get your paperwork started." 
"Didn't think it was so complicated." 
The clerk giggled, "This must be your first time." 
"And my last." 
"Well, this is Tiffany & Co. We're proud of our products," She smiled, motioning for both Simon and Eva to follow her to the office, grasping a mint-colored felt box to hold the ring as well as a decorative and rather lavish bag to put it in after she entered the style number into her computer. "Alright, I'll need a valid I.D. and current address." 
Simon huffed as he removed his wallet from his back pocket, setting his I.D. on the desk, watching how her eyes widened after she had realized he wasn't from the States. And he's British? How'd she get so lucky but yet I'm here trying to steal fiancés? She scoffed to herself. "Is this still your current address?" 
"It won't be, but for now, yes." 
"I'm sorry," She chuckled embarrassingly. "I can't read it. It looks scratched out. What's the street address?" 
"60 Oxford Street, Manchester M1 5EE, United Kingdom." He answered. 
"Apartment number?" 
"262." 
"Thank you. Phone number?" 
"(307) 555-9624." 
"Payment method?" 
"Whatever is easiest." He sighed. 
"I always advise a check for an amount such as this." 
Eva expected Simon's brows to raise in nervousness, but he was dead serious, intentionally not caring how much he was about to spend. She's worth it. 
"Then a check it is." 
He nodded, removing one of many blank checks he tucked away in his wallet. Only ever having to use a check once, he had hoped it would be accepted considering his main branch of bank was based in the United Kingdom. However, he had already gone through the grueling headache of transferring nearly 50% of his funds into American dollars to be able to spend without fail. 
He glanced over at Eva as the clerk continued typing into her computer, reaching over to remove a print-out of the sales invoice as well as the acceptance of the terms and conditions of the transaction. Simon Riley, the clerk sighed. Such a strong name for a strong man. He signed the dotted line before writing the amount of the ring on his check, finding no issue in dropping the grand total of $14,163.12 for the diamond ring. "That's like you're buying a small car." Eva giggled. 
"Cars are that cheap?" He chuckled, leaning back in his chair after sliding the check over the desk. 
"Used ones." The clerk added. I didn't fucking ask for your input, lass.
"I'll let her pick out the wedding ring." He said to Eva. 
"Oh, I think she'll like this one so much she wouldn't want to take it off." 
"She'll still need a band, yeah?" 
Eva nodded, presenting her wedding ring set on her left finger, letting him look at it. Her finger complimented the gold band and gold diamond ring on her finger. Lavish, he thought as he looked at it. "We got this band last year when we renewed our vows." 
"It's lovely. Her father has classy taste." 
"I was surprised," Eva teased, nudging his elbow playfully - just like how Kiera would. It made him smirk, coming to enjoy spending time with her mother. "Bud can have a heart when he wants to." 
"Alright, you're all set! It might take a couple of days for it to show up in your account, but it cleared on my end." The clerk said, taking the tag off of the ring and putting the ring in the iconic "Tiffany Blue" felt box and putting it in the bag as well as a care guide. "This ring does come with a lifetime service. So if she needs it to be resized, cleaned, or tightened, just bring it here and it's complimentary." 
"I'd sure hope so if it was that much." 
The clerk huffed, "Yeah, which I'm sure she'll have to bring it by to have it cleaned if she wears it every day or does strenuous work. She won't have to pay anything upfront." Or if she gains weight, her 'little fingers' will get fat again.
He reached for the bag on the table after he stood to his feet, nodding at her as he offered his hand to Eva, helping the older woman stand to her aching feet as he escorted her out of the office and towards the entrance of the store. "That woman had her eyes on you." Eva giggled. 
"I noticed," Simon scoffed. "The feeling wasn't mutual." 
"I noticed that. Don't bring Kiera in here, she won't be happy." 
"I just might so I can watch her scold that woman." 
Eva laughed, "Would it be shameful if I thought about that too? As much as I hate seeing how mean my daughter can get, she has a mean streak as wide as the valley." 
"That much is true," Simon nodded, chuckling. "But she's calmed down a lot since we got back." 
"I'm glad she has. I don't like seeing her angry. Although I hate the circumstances involved." She frowned, remembering the pain she had to see her daughter in after the Chicago explosion. 
"You won't have to worry about that anymore," Simon assured her, opening the door for her once they reached her SUV, finding himself being just as protective over her mother just as much as he was Kiera. She's just too precious for this world, he thought, recalling the same thoughts he had towards his mother. 
He sat in the passenger seat of the SUV, putting the bag containing the ring between his knees before Eva put the car in gear. "You hungry?" 
"I can wait until I'm home." 
"That's not what I asked, honey." Eva giggled. 
"If that's the case, I can eat if food was offered." 
"That's better. I'll buy your lunch since you blew so much money on my daughter." She teased. 
"Madame, when it comes to your daughter, no amount of money phases me." He chuckled. 
Eva didn't know what to say. Instead, she blushed and giggled, immensely happy for her daughter to have found such a good man. She deserves it so much. I don't think I could get much happier for her. My heart is so full. 
"So, what're you hungry for? Drive-thru or sit-down restaurant?" 
"I'm not opposed to either." Simon shrugged. 
"Well, if I had to choose, I don't like to eat from a drive-thru." 
"So a sit-down restaurant it is."
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nevoadecaipora · 10 months ago
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letshaikyuu · 7 months ago
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pretty setter squad (kageyama, akaashi, oikawa) with their s/o post-practice
a/n: lol hello, I honestly just come here when I am knees deep in uni shit and I should be writing a paper rn but I am writing this heh. hope you all are happy and healthy, and wishing you a lovely month of May soon!
warning: oh definitely some grammar mistakes so i apologize if that triggers you :3
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KAGEYAMA TOBIO
y'all know our boy is dead tired after practice and needed much persuading to finish practice, let alone come home. he only wishes to jump in the shower, eat a hearty meal, lay down in bed, and not move. most of the time he does forget to text you once he's back home, but it's mostly because he's dead tired and wants to chill. he'd be super confused and apologetic at the same time if you were disappointed and/or anxious if he didn't text you that he was home.
if you two don't live together, I imagine him finishing his post-practice routines and then laying down in bed with his washed hair wetting the pillow while he waits for you to video call him. I don't think he'd be the one to initiate a conversation first, especially when he is one minute away from falling asleep, but he does admit that hearing your voice before bed is the best thing ever. while on call, you would do most of the talking, while he nods and occasionally chuckles in amusement, until ultimately dozing off while on call. make sure to take a lot of screenshots of that face because he can either have the most peaceful look on his face and you just have to have that angelic face in your gallery; or he can have the most ridiculous type of face on, with a lil drool, some snoring happening...
if you two do live together, you'd be greeted with a sweaty body just dropping its total weight on you because he's just so tired and also wants to annoy you with him being all sweaty and smelly on you. it's difficult to actually get him to move, especially because he gets rather comfortable in such a position. when you finally get him off, he goes off to shower and spends so much time there you're pretty sure he falls asleep there. he asks you to prepare a hot cup of milk for him once he gets out. you'd get such a gentle kiss on your cheek or lips because he is already dozing off and it'd be such an adorable sight, especially with his freshly washed and dried hair tickling the softness of your cheek and the smell of his body wash enveloping the both of you.
ngl, he would easily fall asleep without you in bed because he's just dead tired lol
AKAASHI KEIJI
he never forgets to call and/or text you once he's done and out of the gym because he knows you'd be worried otherwise. if you live together, he makes sure to ask you if you need anything from the convenience store and also asks you to prepare a hot cup of tea for him (for the two of you if you are also a tea drinker). even if you say you don't need anything from the store, he stops by and buys your favorite snacks and some of his own. i do think his favorite thing to do post-practice is to sit down on the couch with you and talk about your day. i do headcanon him to have a sweet tooth, so he is enjoying that cup of tea with some crackers or cookies and definitely enjoys hearing some of your tea ngl.
even though he is super tired, he cannot fall asleep without you beside him. he finds it interesting how dependent he has become on you, especially if you have moved in together recently. if he is not super tired, he'd move to the bed with a book by his side and read until you're finished with your evening routine and lie down. if he is exhausted, then he forgoes the book, he then lays down and toys with your pillowcase so he doesn't fall asleep. if you take long he definitely closes his eyes and then jolts awake once you get in bed, but he only pulls you closer, kisses you, and falls asleep.
akaashi who does not live with you is fairly similar. while walking back to his house, he'd call you and chat with you until he arrives. you'd end the call while he finishes his shower (maybe not) and dinner, and he'd call you right back once he's done. he then sits down in bed with a cup of tea and a cookie or two on his bedside table, his phone in an active call with you. he may be tired but makes sure to listen to you intently, and when he is almost falling asleep, he apologizes for not paying more attention to you (because he's such a sweetheart like that ngl) and then gives you one of those air kisses before turning around and ultimately falling asleep.
OIKAWA TOORU
he ALWAYS calls you when he's done with practice because this guy has tea to spill from the day. he is so enthusiastic and vibrant that you would think he went out for a cup of coffee and not coming back from volleyball practice. legend says (aka iwaizumi) that he is a part of the Walking Dead in the locker room but always puts on the best version of himself when you're around. when he's finally at the front of his house, he makes sure to be as quiet as possible so he doesn't wake his family up and then says he'll call you once he's in bed.
now, Oikawa does sometimes fall asleep without showering or anything which is definitely a shocking statement for someone as tidy and clean as Oikawa, I can easily imagine him just face-planting on his bed and saying he'd get up in 5 minutes and just falling asleep lol. however, that's a rare occasion and also he'd wake up once you text/call him anyway. you will be on a video call while he's doing his skincare routine because he needs to show you that soft-ass skin and all his products.
oikawa who lives with you is very much needy once he's back home. he wants a hug as soon as he's home because he misses you so much and he'd like to have dinner together with you. i don't think he's the best cook out there, but he knows how to prepare some bomb-ass meals for pre-/post-workouts. of course, if you're not up for that he can stomach a cup of ramen. the night is not complete without him spilling the tea on every mishap that happened during practice and also inquiring about your day. he falls asleep on the couch and spills whatever food he's holding in his hands. this leads to him startling awake and screaming at the mess he's made...it's never a dull moment with this guy.
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sanguineterrain · 1 year ago
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Feel like I’m so basic but Jason Todd with a crush and him having zero social skills and just being super clumsy despite being highly competent when he’s in the field. Crush is like real sweet and kind maybe a service worker ✨
anon u are so true and real for this bc jason is definitely an unsocialized cat when he has a crush 💓
jason todd x gn!reader. shyish/anxious jason with a big fat crush. baker reader. annoying customer. the duality of jason todd. 1.6k words.
also i fully believe that silently leaving huge tips as a way to flirt is like. a wayne trait. 100% that family does that bc of bruce.
prompt lists are here! i reblog all fics to @sanguinelibrary
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Business has been slow.
It's not like you expect your cafe to be packed to the rafters all day long, but you've had a grand total of four customers today. One of them only came in to ask where Starbucks was.
Frankly, you're not sure the cafe can afford to stay afloat for much longer. Gotham isn't known to preserve small businesses, and the conglomerates (cough, Wayne Enterprises) are taking over the world anyway.
So today is a reading day. You might even close early.
You're at a table in the back, so absorbed in Poirot's sleuthing that you don't hear the door open. It isn't until you turn the page and look up that you see your resident lurker waiting quietly at the display case. You flinch so hard that you spill iced tea on your jeans.
"Shit," you murmur, grabbing a wad of napkins and patting yourself dry.
Jason (as is written on his coffee cup) looks up from the pastries, teal eyes wide. You smile briefly at him. For such a big guy, his footsteps are astonishingly soft.
"Is everything okay?" he asks, voice rough like he doesn't speak much.
"Yeah, fine. You just startled me—I didn't hear you come in. Were you waiting long? Sorry about that."
"Oh. No, I wasn't. Sorry." He shifts weight between his feet. "You seemed pretty engrossed in your book. I didn't, uh, want to disturb you."
"Oh, hey, don't worry about that! It's literally my job to be here," you say, though you can't help but melt over how freaking sweet that is.
Jason visits you a minimum of twice a week. He's been coming for a couple of weeks. You know a whole three things about him: he's a university student, he pretty much only dresses in red or black, and he's unfairly cute.
At first, you were reasonably wary of him because it's Gotham, and he's so damn quiet. It's a little scary. You thought maybe he was an undercover spy casing the joint. Now you know he's just awkward.
"Slow day?" he asks.
"Slow year, more like. How are you? How was your exam?"
He blinks. "Exam?"
"Didn't you have an American lit exam last week?"
"Oh. Uh, yeah. Wow. Yes, I did. It was okay. Got an A."
"That's great! I knew you'd ace it."
His cheeks turn pink. Okay, you actually know four things about him: he blushes a lot.
You go to start the coffee machine. "Do you think you'll—"
"I-I have to go."
You watch, stunned, as he hurries out the door. That's when you notice the fifty dollar bill in your tip jar.
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You don't know if you should bring up yesterday. Jason's back; that probably means everything's fine, right? You're not sure if you said something wrong, though. You've gone over the interaction a hundred times since and you can't figure out why he's so skittish around you.
"Hi. Hibiscus tea, please," he says, stoic as always.
You prepare his order, yesterday's interaction still fresh in your head. You should say something, shouldn't you? Or...
"Sorry about yesterday," Jason blurts, so fast you almost miss it. "Running out, I mean. I was, uh—I forgot something."
Well. Looks like he's going to bring it up for you.
"Oh, you don't have to apologize! If I said something wrong..."
Jason shakes his head fervently. "No, God no. You're perfect."
Your eyebrows shoot up. He turns red this time.
"I mean—not perf—well, you're amazing, don't get me wrong! Except, like, what is perfect, y'know? My brother has gotten into the habit of calling everything perfection like some kind of sitcom character. Alfred will make pie, and Dick'll go, "Alfie, that was perfection." And I feel like it's such an exaggeration—"
Jason's mouth snaps closed. He rubs his forehead.
"Um, I actually have chronic foot-in-mouth disease. It gets really, stupidly bad. Sorry."
You're trying hard not to giggle. You want to smother him in frosting and take a bite.
"You're really sweet, you know that?" you say.
"I'm really not," he says with a sigh.
"Not true. Can you do me a favor?"
"Anything."
You go into the kitchen and return with your latest experiment: matcha cream puffs.
"Do you mind trying these for me? You're not allergic to anything, are you?"
Jason's shoulders hunch. "Are you sure you want my opinion?"
"Of course I'm sure," you say happily. "I trust you."
"You trust me," he repeats quietly.
"Yup!"
Jason takes a puff and bites. He starts to nod.
"It's really good. You're really—all your creations are—yeah. It's good."
You squint. "No notes? Really?"
"They're perfection, as my brother would say."
Fuck, you like him so much.
"Have another one," you say, pushing the tray towards him.
"I shouldn't—"
"Wait! I'll pack you some!" you interrupt, flitting back to the kitchen to get a Tupperware.
Jason helplessly accepts the container of puffs you shove into his hands.
"Let me pay-" he tries to say, but you shake your head.
"Nope! I won't accept payment for these. Not from my favorite customer."
"Your favorite?"
"My favorite," you confirm, grinning.
"Oh." His ears turn pink as he walks to the door, cream puffs in hand. "Uh, right. Thanks. See you tomorrow."
"Jason? Don't you want your tea?"
"Shit. Yeah." He returns to the counter and takes his drink. This he insists on paying for, so you let him, because you do have rent to pay, after all.
"So nice to see you!" you add, because the stiffness in his gait is kind of throwing you off.
He just nods, slipping out the door as quietly as he came.
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Today, Jason's in a red workout tank. You have to make the conscious effort to not ogle his arms.
"Hey, Jason!" you say cheerily.
"Hi," he says softly.
"The usual?" you ask, and he looks up in surprise.
"You know my order?"
You gently roll your eyes. "Of course I know your order, silly. Favorite customer, remember?"
"Oh." He looks away, brow furrowed. Then he turns to you and his expression smooths over. "Yes, please. Thanks."
"Sure. Give me one second? I just have to finish decorating some sugar cookies."
"Take your time," Jason says, then goes to skulk by the window.
The door is suddenly swung harder than necessary, thumping the glass.
"Hey!"
You look up from the cookies. A man in a suit is waving his phone impatiently.
"I ordered a dozen muffins. Where are they, huh?" he demands.
"Oh, right! Well, you called ten minutes ago, so they won't be ready till six, sir. Can I get you something while you wait?"
He scoffs and stomps to the counter. You almost back down, but you don't; that's exactly what these bullies want.
"This is exactly why no one eats at dinky cafes like yours. You can't even do this!" he fumes, shoving a finger in your face.
"Sir, like I said, the muffins are baking..."
"I know the city's health inspector personally," the man spits viciously. "One call, and I can—"
"Say one more word."
You blink as Jason is suddenly between you and the customer, stood at his full height. He's all muscle and broad shoulders, looming over the guy. You peek around him.
"What the fuck, man?" the angry customer squawks. "Move!"
"No, you move," Jason says, tone lethal. "Sit quietly at a table and wait for your muffins to bake. Then you can thank the nice baker for waiting on your sorry ass and you're not gonna come back. They have far more patience for entitled fucks than I do."
"Fuck you," the man spits.
Jason calmly closes the distance between them and whispers in his ear, hand like a vice around the jerk's shoulder. You watch as he turns pale, eyes growing wider.
"Sound good?" Jason asks pleasantly, all teeth. The man gapes at him.
Wow. Yeah. This is really doing something for you.
The oven dings. You go to retrieve the muffins, packing them as quickly as possible. You give him the box and the man nods.
"Thanks," he mumbles, then scurries out of the store.
Jason turns to you, and it's like looking at a completely different person.
"You okay?" he asks, posture stiff like he's still prepared for a fight.
You nod, a little dazed.
"Yeah. Wow. Jason, I... you didn't have to do that. I mean, thank you for doing it, but..."
"Hey, that guy was a jackass. And if you have trouble with him or anyone else, call me, okay?"
This side of him stuns you. If you didn't know better, you'd think he had this exchange regularly.
"Call you?" you ask, smiling. "How will I call you if I don't have your number?"
He freezes, eyes wide. "Oh. Uh. Um..."
You lean over, elbows on your counter. He watches you. You cup your hand around your mouth, pretending to divulge a secret.
"This is where you, the cute guy who frequents my struggling cafe, gives me your number."
"You think I'm cute?" he asks.
"Devastatingly so," you say, grinning.
He's quiet for a long moment. Your smile starts to dim.
"Did I read this wrong?" you ask. "If I came off too strong..."
"No!" he says a little too loud. Jason winces. "Sorry. No. I... you're... fuck, I'm not good at this. I don't even really drink tea or coffee, to be honest. I just come in to see you."
"You do?"
Jason sighs. "Yeah. Shit. That's creepy, isn't it?"
You laugh and he visibly softens.
"No, Jason," you say warmly. "It's sweet."
"So can I still ask you on a proper date? Not coffee."
You grin. "That would be perfection."
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teojira · 6 months ago
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(Planet of the apes) Please can you give me anything about Caesar like head cannons a fanfic anything please I am just in the mood for Caesar :(
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[Assortment of Caesar headcanons]
Summary: Just random headcanons for Caesar x reader <3
Warnings: Monster/Human romance, angst, can't think of anything else!
A/N: Caesar my BELOVED, I hope these are okay anon! You didn't specify if you wanted romantic or platonic so I'll do a mix of both that you can read as either or! I love my man sm
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Caesar is an old man at this point, he's tired. This being said, he is not above pinning you down and resting his entire fucking body weight on you.
You can struggle all you want, you cannot lift him up and you just have to sit there and let him do what he wants. And what he wants is to have 5 minutes of quiet with his favorite human, okay? Let him have this.
Caesar also takes it upon himself to help groom you, parting your hair, scratching at your scalp and checking you for anything, taking your face in his hands and twisting and turning your head every which way.
Very very huge worrier, he worries for you so much and it comes out as anger. He's not mad at you for doing what he seems stupid shit, he's mad because he's scared of you getting hurt and he can't fix it.
He usually won't leave you alone without at least one ape he trusts in the beginning, he's worried about another ape like Koba emerging, so for his sake, please stick around with Maurice.
Maurice loves you by the way, and so does Nova. Since you're immune to the sickness, you're able to freely interact with her, so whenever you're not with Caesar or Cornelius, you're with them.
Caesar watches you alot when you're not looking, especially when you're laughing and smiling with the young girl. It fills his heart with warmth, even more so when you include other apes in on your jokes.
Give him hugs, he'll never admit just how touch starved he is, the only apes he has physical affection with often were Cornelia, Blue eyes and Koba. He won't admit it that he misses it, but he gets a little huffy if you go on to hug Rocket and not him.
You make him feel younger, almost like how he used to be when he was with Will. Yes, he's a leader and he will always predominantly be the collected and righteous leader, but he has his little shit tendencies that come out when he's around you.
I don't care what anyone says, Caesar is asshole at his core, he's just repressed it because he's a leader. He's the kind of person to have a bug in his hand, and gesture for you to open your palm.
"Open your hand."
"...I don't trust you."
"You do trust me, now open."
And then you have a centipede in your hand and you screech and he just smirks and huffs out a laugh.
I've said it before but he is so overprotective, you will not leave the confines of the colony if he can help it.
He knows you're a grown adult, and that you are capable of holding your own but he doesn't care. He much rather have you here when he can keep an eye out for you.
That being said, he will go with you if you're insistent, he has to teach Cornelius how to hunt and fish anyways, so you come with. It's a family day trip:)
Caesar doesn't like guns, but he gives you a pistol, it's a huge sign of trust due to losing his wife and son by them, by being shot by them, and you know he's trusting you with his life.
Speaking of trauma, he littered with it. Sleep doesn't come as easy to him anymore, he's too anxious, to the point you're scared he'll have a heart attack.
The only way you've found that he'll relax enough to sleep is when you and Cornelius are by his side, his arms wrapped around the both of you.
He finds it hard to tell you about Cornelia, especially since you're both teetering on the verge of something more, he feels like he's betraying her, but you reassure him you'll wait for him as long as he needs. Never overstepping any boundary he has.
He loves you, truly he does, he didn't think he could continue on, even with getting everyone to relative safety, but you've always been there, loving not only him, but everyone else around you. He doesn't know what he'd do without you.
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starfishstark · 7 days ago
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frank with someone who's very independent but actually pretty anxious inside? a person who can talk and appear pretty confident but really is super shy and quiet if you got to know her really. I just feel like he's pick up in that so early, doing chores for you he knows you don't like to do. AND when he finally gets you in bed and sees how shy you are he's shocked at the difference
OH. EM. GEEEEEEEE.
girl the way i could talk about this for hours im literally on my phone and im about to spit out all my headcanons on this (probably 700+ words on this, eyeballing)
if ur here for smut i have it bolded where it starts from
we all know, no shit, frank has UNHEALTHY habits. like man will rely on the fucking force and will power to get through his day, but the second it’s anyone else? it’s all of a sudden “nah, you knew you were hurting urself and you let it slide? nah you don���t hurt someone i love.” dhhdjeuxhdj man just fuck me on the wall don’t you
and i’m assuming like this is a reader who knows how to cope with that anxiety, just getting through her day and pulling through till she can curl up next to him at the end of the night, wanting sleep so she can just shut everything out for a second till the next day
NOW ME PERSONALLY. THIS FITS ME SO WELL. everyone assumes im an extrovert bc of how much i like to talk to people and openly try new things, BUTTTT if you were really close to me, you’d know how much i’d like to step back and let someone else take the wheel, how much i’d CRAVE it.
i’d be friending all night and day for a chance to just let someone control me (frank castle, baby, WHERE YOU ATTTT)
i think frank would clock you out so GODDAMN QUICK. in his life? false walls, fake personalities, they don’t work out. he’s gotta know who’s who at the very instant he meets them.
see you may think you’re masking your anxiety pretty well, or that you’re hiding this shyness great with conversation and such, but he notices. maybe it’s the way you tug on your sleeve, play with your rings, sway back and forth in a comforting rhythm just waiting to get by yourself again.
and here is our conundrum- frank castle knows you.
he all of a sudden knows the big ol secret that you’ve been covering for a while, because what the fuck? being vulnerable? huh? what’s that?
and it just shoots up from there, everytime you’re around him before you start dating, he starts doing little things to ease your anxiety.
maybe you’re getting food with your friends, he guides you in with the rest of the group, gets a table and gets everyone situated, and all of a sudden he’s telling you about this amazing dish on the menu that you’ll like, so you don’t have to worry about ordering. your fav drink? already memorized for last time. what? you need to book a ride back home? tf he just standing there for, “c’mon little lady, i gotchu covered.”
it’s so fucking pleasing to be around, relieving to experience, and just so perfect that you don’t notice he’s doing it on purpose, for you.
by the time you start dating, there’s so much trust built upon that foundation— yes, you can get bold and sassy time to time, but he knows at the end of the day, you want to be held. you want to just be held so tight like the rest of the world would fall apart if you didn’t, you want to feel like every seam is about to start floating apart if he doesn’t get those huge arms around you right there and then, squeezing like a weighted blanket, like a safe haven in the midst of everything
(i’m so fucking single someone hold me)
any time he’d notice your anxiety tics, like your hands kneading themselves in your lap, all of a sudden observing the lights in the middle of a conversation, oh he’s step right in, getting close to your ear so you could feel his presence around, so you could correlate the moment you felt safe and maybe trick your brain into giving into the warmth js for a second if he could help
“smthn the matter? talk to me hun”
right, but you being you, you get all people pleasing, lighting up your face with that years-of-practice smile and answering brightly enough that it tricks most people
frank being the only exception, taking your answer if your in public and reapproaching alone, or if it’s in public and it’s someone else bothering you, oh he’s be so quick to pluck you out of that place like a daisy.
already planning getting your favorite drink and someone to sit and talk so you don’t feel like you wasted a day, tf was that supposed to mean anyways, wasting a day? with a face like that? ain’t a day wasted when he woke up next to that face resting next to him.
if you’re the person to feel anxiety from just a messy house, he wouldn’t even complain. by the time you got home, the dishes are already out of the sink and arranged
the counters decluttered, and at least the bed is made. it puts your mind to ease when you don’t have to do it after your day, able to just toe your shoes off and run for a hot warm shower and then get started on dinner
if you didn’t want to make dinner, he’s already tying his apron or calling up take out (where tf does he get his money from? ion kno)
if ur like me, you like to make dinner in a clean kitchen bc u can play music, dance around and get stuff chopped up, cooked up, smelling good and tasting even better and it’s a control that seems small, but it just lets you…quiet. it’s a process but it’s not tedious, it’s healing, yknow.
he’s come up behind you, those large hands on your hips (fucking veiny, large, calloused hands on your hips, fingers splayed with and across the skin, the balm to your jittery energy, the still you need to stop moving so much, the need for your desires, god, i could write headcanons about those hands itself)
anyways. he’s deeply inhaling with his head crooked down to rest on your shoulder while he peers into whatever you were making, listening attentively, letting you get into the whole works of it.
you babble mindlessly while you cook, here and there breaking into dance from the music playing, and frank all but indulges you, letting you have your little bubble in this home, if not here then where?
ok, shut up starry, she came here for the fun stuff, stop projecting ur domestics canons onto them
(cri)
ladies and gentlemen of the jury, i plead guilty. pls have frank castle fuck me. matt is my lawyer he’s a very good one, tell em matt tell em how much i need frankie to bend me over
(matt sighs from the table: this is a parking ticket.)
now before yall got intimate for the first time, he knows you’re a tease, it’s an easy joke that spills out, oh yeah you’ve observed it people love to gaffaw at those kinda jokes, and you love to please some people.
and even with him, the stupidest things, and you’re a tease about it.
you’re kissing maybe, or maybe you just feel the energy, and you’re already yapping off going on and diffusing tension building inside you, it’s not anxiety but you can’t quite pinprick it yet. he makes you feel alive, but it’s new and you try to rid of it
oh but he gets your quiet real quick doesn’t he. all it takes is a “look at me, don’t hide. let me see your eyes.”
FUCK. GODDAMMIT. HOLY MAMA HAVE MY BABIES.
eye contact is SO HARD when you’re strung up, the thought of someone looking into you seeing you when you’re not your perfect self, it’s horrifying. yet he loves you so; maybe even more when that smug smile rests at his lips, pulling you by the chin back in for a smile.
yall haven’t even taken your clothes off yet, oh he’s gonna get a kick outta this
and we all know we’d already be wet as a slip n slide at this point, but he’s a gentlemen so he takes his sweet ol time with foreplay, lips on your skin while he unhooks your bra with one hand (my favorite party trick you geezer, js for me?) and all of a sudden you’re huffing and soft pants when his hands grasp at your chest, squeezing, with those hands, rough and yet measured delicately, oh he knows how to string you apart like that, you’re not moaning yet, but it takes you by surprise, your breaths are ticking up at the end, you like this so damn much
but frank is nothing if not a clever bastard, he makes you say it. “u like that? cmon, say it, hun. tell me to keep going, tell me you like that.”
yessir yessir yessir. god you can’t even look him in the eyes, mesmerized by the way everything feels that you trying to tuck yourself into him, wanting everything, wanting closeness, wanting him.
you’d end up murmuring something out, and he’d respond that he could hear you actually, insist on the fact (except he could hear the change in your breath from at ease to anxious? sure.)
he wouldn’t stop pressing against you, a soft roll of his hips before you could even start your second attempt at the sentence, effectively shutting you up and going “m cmon, lemme hear you.”
he’s not talking about you talking anymore
franks not stopping till you’re practically whimpering that it feels good, that he should keep going, shaking like a leaf, so he shushes you up, making quick work of the clothes, and kissing you brainless
“mm so quiet hunny? where’d my big-talking girl go, huh?”
MY GIRL 😫
(i have issues i know pls move along)
now he’s got you on your back, or pressed against the headboard, anywhere where he pries your legs apart, a kiss to your soft inner thighs as a thanks, one hand splayed across your hip and the other trying to work you open and loosen you up.
your eyes are skirting around, going here and there and trying to find a place to rest, practically blaring in your head DO NOT look down there; do NOT look up at him; Do NOT look at those damn muscle chiseled shoulders; the LAMP. yes. the lamp, very sexy, just focus on the lamp.
aw he’s having none of that, two fingers deep inside of you, not yet touching your sensitive soft clit, the sounds lewd and slick. knuckles deep, hitting places u physically couldn’t with his thicker longer fingers, grinning softly at your hesitance of where to look. that damn smile is what got you into this mess in the first place
“hun, look, look at me, ok? nah nunna that thinking nonsense, just look at me…n feel—yeah, you like that? right there? good girl, lemme hear you.”
you’re trembling, you’re gone coming after all that, eyes catching his and struggling still, but it’s his girls first time with a man good as him, he’s gotta let it slide. (oh he’s just a sucker for you)
once he’s successfully got you coming the first time, he’s gone. driven mad. you got this sheer coat of sweat painting your skin like a painting, eyes twinkling while they look up at him with expectations that he’s going to more than fulfill, hands propping herself up while he slides a pillow under her hips, so damn vulnerable and soft and fucking willing for him, willing to put up with his bullshit and his paranoia, trusting him and letting him control the moment, letting him soothe you, your need, it’s all driving him mad.
MADLY IN LOVE MWAHHAHAHAHAH (i am so sorry everyone i am not a serious person)
he knows you’re more sensitive cause you just came, and every stretch, every touch, feels like bliss exploding across your skin. it makes you so damn beautiful in his eyes
your hands are so small on him, anchoring onto his bicep or his shoulders, finding some place to hold onto while he fucking rails you into that bed
you know what getting hit by a freight train is like? me neither, but franks hotter than one anyways so who tf cares.
he’s got you gasping. hes got you there.
and all that sass, the attitude, teasing you gave him? worth every damn second of this. of this nervous shy girl that he knows js what to do with
make a (consensual) mess outta her
if you thought you’re getting away with only cumming once, well. it’s a good think he doesn’t want you to think in the first place, so you just lay back and let him take of it, why don’t ya?
ok back to my wholesome thoughts. we going aftercare with this one
ok anyways else a little sassy after sex like they’re making up for how dumb they were during it
(everyone boos at me. matt murdock in the back raises his hand and nods. “she’s right” he says. thank you matt)
so he’s cleaning you up and teasing you about what a mess it is down there and ur like “well who’s fault is that?”
and he grins, pressing just a little harder into that mound and rendering you useless for a minute, till you’re back again and going at him and he’s just smiling bc his girl is back. sassy, attitude, he loves it all. (especially when you’re as nervous as a mouse under him, but two sides to every coin type shi, yknow?)
warm bath depending on how boneless you are, still talking some crap against him while he picks you up from the bed like a bag of grapes, carrying you to the bath, (you’re still going on by the way)
it’s so heartwarming, just the way you got back up, he loves it. he loves you.
yeah, he loves you, alright.
and he gets u sushi. lotta sushi required for aftercare. or whatever the fuck you prefer. fufu? shi there’s gotta be a place in all of new york still open, and there’s gotta be some poor door dasher still ready to drive it over. italian? why didn’t u say so, the aprons coming out again.
anyways. cuddles. u get it i don’t gotta say more i’ve said enough.
i feel like deadpool with the amount of talking i just did. if i yap this much again, someone PLS say “starry, stfu” and get me outta my funk PLS
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nian-7 · 1 year ago
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I have a request if thats okay for you! Take your timee!!
The reader gets stabbed in the chest And literally coughing blood and shit and dies and literally a minute later they are like "hi :3" (they literally have a shit eating smile as if they didnt just die a few minutes ago) while they are literally wasting tears for them and they just look at the reader still crying but looks like theyre about to slap the reader, the reason for them not dying just yet is because they literally have two lives and just used one for this (lets say crack if you will lol.) Ty!!
Includes: Jing yuan, Yanqing, Blade, Serval
Y anon </33
hello! this is a funny concept so please enjoy!
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Serval, Jing Yuan, Yanqing x gn!reader
✧having two lives
✧crack, tw: blood, injuries
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" It's gonna be alright, (name)- " She was kneeled beside your bleeding body in the snowy outskirts of Belobog. It had just been a short trip out and neither of you had expected to get attacked. You tried getting up as she forced you back to laying down. " Please, just lay down while we wait for the Silvermane Guards. " She had a sad look on her face as she spoke.
" I'll- " You coughed, making her flinch as she saw blood come out from your mouth. " I'll be- okay.. " Your breath was getting shallow as she helped you sit up to prevent you from choking on your own blood.
" Just rest, it'll be okay, yeah? They'll be here soon to take you to a doctor. " She assured, not wanting you to feel anxious or scared.
" You know.. " You started, looking over at her. " You really are a great girlfriend. " You gave a weak smile as you felt her squeeze your hand. She felt you go limp as she held you up, your hand no longer grabbing her own.
Tears pricked at her eyes as she stared at you, death had finally come to take you after you had bled out.
Your nose then scrunched up.
" Gross, what is that smell? " You opened your eyes, looking at Serval then back down at you. " Don't cry, I'm alive. " You smiled, her face was covered in disbelief.
" You- but you died? " She wiped a tear that was in her eye.
" Yeah but, I have two lives! Two! " You put up two fingers, much like a peace sign, and put it towards her. " I just used one so I have one more! " She sighed and hugged you tightly.
" ...Thank god. "
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You found yourself being carried in the General's arms after you had been fatally wounded on a mission. You'd manage to get away even so, he feared you had little time left.
" I'm sure you will be alright, (name). " He looked down at you in his arms as he headed back towards the Luofu. " You must not worry. "
" Ah.. yeah, but it really hurts- Like really, really hurts. " You winced as you touched the wound on your abdomen.
" Refrain from touching it, I would not like for you to get an infection on top of such a fatal wound. " He had a stern yet caring look as he looked at you.
" Sorry, I just need to close my eyes for a bit.. " You felt your eyes fluttering closed as his eyes widened at you.
" (name), please try to keep your eyes open. We'll be th- " Your eyes had already closed, your body limp in his arms. Your weight now felt like dead weight as he stopped, looking down at your now lifeless form. " Ah.. " He needed to get you back as soon as he could, he shouldn't mourn you here.
You let out a sigh, your eyes opening once again.
" Sorry about that- Seems like I died though, huh? " You looked up at him. " I'm fine now, onwards! Back home! "
You heard him sigh as he started walking again. " You got me there. I truly believed you had died on me. It was not a pleasant feeling. I do have many questions for you alas, you should rest for now. "
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" (name)! (name)! Don't fall asleep! " Yanqing sat beside you has you held your side. He had called for back up and a doctor but refused to leave you alone when you were like this. " You gotta stay awake, okay?! " His voice betrayed him as he talked to you, sadness was evident in it.
" Alright, alright.. I'm trying, " You let out a laugh. " I'll be fine, don't worry, okay? Just a little stab wound isn't going to get me. " You squeezed his hand gently.
" Just- stay awake! " He held your hand close to his chest as he looked at you. " You just gotta! " You gave a nod back as his eyes became glassy.
" Don't cry, Yanqing- " You coughed, going limp for a minute. Yanqings eyes started to water as he gently shook you.
" (name)?! " You let out a shaky breath a moment later, tears had started to come out of his eyes. He hugged you tightly.
" Yanqing! Not so tight! " You patted his back, signaling for him to loosen his grip.
" I'm just- just super happy you're okay! " He wiped the tears from his eyes. " Don't fall asleep again, okay? I'm going to stay right here and make sure you don't! "
" Alright, I promise.. " You smiled at the boy.
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please do not repost any of my work without my permission, thank you for reading.
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wheresmymilliondollarman · 2 years ago
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aaron warner x ferrars! reader pt. 3
when omega point falls, you find yourself in need of the supreme commander's son, and discover unresolved feelings along the way.
(taken place during ignite me & hc continuation from part two)
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that is literally me in this gif y'all🖤🖤
a/n: hello!! finally back with part 3. i'm sorry for the wait, i wanted to do other requests, but tbh i might focus on this little series so that way it's complete and everyone can read it all together. also idk why i even label it hcs anymore LMAOO like i feel it's progressed to a fic atp, but i'm too stubborn to change my format and titles, so humor me LOL. (maybe i'll turn this into a legit fic when i finish, who knows) pls do not kill me for not including every detail, i tried to highlight the best parts as much as i could. also might seem all sunshine rainbows rn with relationships, but just wait for the next book��� 🤞 extra info: kinda change adam's character cus i feel like he was an extra ass at times for no reason in the book?? like trying to kill kenji for no reason?? small redemption arc. kinda slight change to juliette. also, i love making reader, juliette, and kenji a lil trio.
word count: 10.7k (im insane)
warnings: mentions of fights, blood, injuries, and death. use of military time (reader so me fr bc it took me so long to understand that shit), suggestive and matureish content.
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the first thing on your mind, when you woke up, is that you had to be dead. if you opened your eyes, you would see the golden gates of heaven or the fiery pit of hell. based on how you lived your short life: you were thinking hell.
you realized you were alive and mostly well from the horrible aching from your body, the bandages wrapped around your chest, and the fact your current surrounding was a bedroom.
"hey, amor, take it easy." a voice said as you attempted to sit up.
by your side was aaron warner, sitting down on a stool next to the bed you laid on. he, uncharacteristically, looked disheveled, his clothes messy, and his eyes anxious.
your panic arose as you remembered events - fighting against the reestablishment, then getting caught, and then being shot in the chest by anderson. and then you recognized the room; it was aaron's bedroom - back at the base.
aaron notices your alarm and grabs your hands to calm you down. "it's alright you're safe here, i'm not gonna hurt you."
it may have been an idiotic move, but you believed his words.
"why are we here?"
"i had no choice. everyone believes your dead, and the base is the best place to keep you hidden."
"i don't understand...i'm not a medic by any means, but shouldn't i be dead?"
"you have sara and sonya to thank for that. they were able to save your heart from stopping before being dragged away by my father. then, i was able to take their energy as my own and heal the rest of you."
you were thankful for his aid in your life being saved, but you were too focused on many other worries to properly thank him. like the state of your friends.
you try your hand at getting up, trying to ignore the dizziness that comes with it. aaron holds you steady to stop you from falling.
aaron protests, "you need to res-" but you interrupt, "i need to go. i-i have to find everyone and help them."
"you can't."
you stop your movement and turn to aaron, "what do you mean? i know i'm in horrible shape, but i have to see juliette and everyone else could be in troubl-"
"it's over."
your face scrunches up in confusion, "what?"
aaron's silent for a few movements; you can't breathe. he looks down, his grip on you tightening, "they're dead. all of them."
you look at him in horror, your mouth open, but no words are released. your knees give out, and Aaron carries your full weight in his arms.
he slowly brings you both down to the ground next to the bed, still holding onto you. "i'm sorry, please believe me when i say that. if there was a way to spare you of this pain i would do it in a heartbeat."
you feel like a shell of yourself, you have no reaction, just an emotionless look on your face.
"what happened?" you say in a monotone voice.
"amor, i think you need to lay down or shower, then eat some-"
"what happened," you repeat with a harsher voice.
"they... overtook your friends, some were taken to be tortured, but most were.. shot dead."
"and omega point?"
"....destroyed. they got the coordinates and bombed the entire foundation."
you feel disconnected from reality; nothing feels real. everything is numb; you can't find it in yourself to let out any sort of emotion.
"so juliette, kenji, adam, james..."
aaron didn't need to answer for you to know. they're gone.
the first thing you did was laugh like a lunatic, aaron likely looked at you like you were mad. then finally, the tears came.
you yelled at aaron to get out, even though it was his room. in hysteria, you started levitating things and throwing them at him until he exited the room.
you don't know how long you spent sobbing on the floor next to the bed. you weren't even sure if you were going to stop.
your voice was sore from the number of times you wailed apologies to juliette for being a bad sister and for not being there to protect your friends.
when the tears finished, you reached denial. you knew your friends - there was no way they were dead. juliette was stronger than you, physically and sometimes mentally, so if you could survive a bullet to the chest, your sister could be alive.
when aaron comes back hours later to check on you, he didn't expect to see you walking around in new attire, packing clothes and items into a bag.
"what are you doing?"
"i have to go back."
aaron was taken aback by your statement, but you claimed there was a possibility there were people who survived. he countered saying he'd seen the damage and it wasn't likely. you didn't listen to him and continued preparing.
"this is unhealthy and possibly delusional thinking."
"well, then put me back in the asylum if i'm wrong. i'm going if you let me or not."
he sighs, and then gives in, not before insisting he comes along with you. now you were the one taken aback. was he actually offering to help you?
"why do you seem surprised? it's not as if i haven't made my care for you quite clear."
"no offense, but you're the most confusing man ever. i want to trust you, i've seen your good-natured side. you even claim to.. love me. but you work for the reestablishment, but then claim to be on my side. don't forget the fact you tried to turn juliette and i into weapons for the reestablishment, held us, hostage, at your base, and put us into a torture chamber. not exactly behavior that screams i want to help you."
at this he laughs then laughs harder and you get annoyed, not knowing what was funny. you were ready to kick him out again until he finally stooped.
"i suppose i owe you a long overdue explanation."
nothing prepared you for his next words. aaron began to retell the events from his perspective. starting with his true intentions of bringing you and juliette from the asylum - to study the both of you.
aaron explained his mother's condition, being unable to be touched - a reverse juliette basically. he sought out her at first, then discovered your existence and became intrigued more.
he invented the guise of using you both for weapons as a way for his father to agree to invest in you both.
as anderson mentioned before, juliette was of special interest because of her ability, and yours wasn't as impressive to him at the time. aaron had to convince the commander that your mind reading ability would be great for spy purposes.
once he brought the two of you to the base, he was ready to face 2 vicious and demented sisters, but it was literally the opposite of that. instead he got stuck with two stubborn and immature, you were offended at that, teenage girls.
"juliette was more of the hard-headed one, you mostly just followed along, i figured that out after the dinner and dress stunt. however, i can't say feeding you myself wasn't pleasurable for myself."
aaron saw your fear of your own ability and had intentions to help you and juliette, in his own way.
his tried various ways to unlock your potential - with juliette he tried anger and bullying and with you he knew you couldn't suppress hearing thoughts, so he figured spending time with you was the best option. but he came to understand how much he loved being around you.
"i was so addicted to being around you, i got sidetracked. but then my worry grew when you both showed no progress on enhancing your ability, so as a last resort, i arranged an experiment."
to your surprise, he revealed it was actually a simulation which was a major relief to you that no one was actually harmed by your powers, well, no one besides warner. but he partly deserved it for putting you through that.
although you were mad he implanted that fear into you, you had to admit. it did work.
"so, instead of finding some way to inform me earlier of all this, you make my sister and i think of you as some supervillain who wanted control of our autonomy." you grab the nearest pillow and launch it at him. "you're an idiot! we were scared out of our minds! juliette and i's last conversation was a fight over that! do you know much much time you could- are you seriously smiling?"
"god, i love it when you yell at me."
now that the ait was clear, you were able to put more of your faith into aaron and his intentions. and not feel bad about kissing him.
the two of you worked together on a plan to get you back to what was left of omega point.
you met an older gentleman by the name of delalieu. he was very sweet, but it got a little vexing every time he jumped to warner's defense whenever you made a remark; even ones said in levity. 
a few days later, when aaron deemed it safer, you both set off to leave. although you had the misfortune of having to be stuffed into a cart to avoid being spotted. at least it was better than the body bag you were transported in the first time.
the two of you transported to what was left of omega point in a tank. aaron notably was able to drive to the location with ease. you grew suspicious because one - he told his father he didn't know how to get there and two - he was unconscious the whole time you, juliette, kenji, and adam drove there. you decide to question him on the matter.
"i wasn't completely unconscious on the trip there. i was very conscious when you were touching my hair and tracing my features."
"i knew it! you little faker, you intentionally pushed yourself onto me didn't you!"
when you both arrived, the scene was as horrible as you imagined. - rubbles and dust everywhere and a huge gaping hole miles down. you felt sick thinking about everyone who stayed behind, including james. god, you hoped at least your friends were alright.
you were suddenly tackled to the ground by warner, and the sound of a gunshot followed after. a voice yelled out, and you immediately recognized it - kenji.
you got up instantly and ran to him, attacking him with a gigantic hug, tears brimming at your eyes.
"oh my god, i thought you were dead!"
"i thought you were dead!"
"you almost killed me right now when you shot at us like a lunatic!"
"sorry, i was aiming for warner- where'd he go?"
you change subject, "juliette? is she alright?"
kenji confirms she is alive, and you felt like you could breathe again. you needed to see her as soon as possible.
kenji started looking for warner like a madman, and you, too, were curious about his whereabouts - until he startled you by "showing" up behind you. he had turned himself invisible.
he was ready to take you both back before kenji shot him, but you declined to say you had to see juliette and anyone else that survived. aaron was reluctant but then handed you a pager, not that you knew what it was, and gave you a limit of four hours. you thought it to be ridiculous, but you compromised to ease his worries.
you and kenji ventured back to adam's house, your first time being there since you were unable to the first time around. he, heart-achingly, filled you in on the events, how they searched for you, how many were lost, and who remained. you told your side of the action, including everything with aaron.
kenji did have some judgemental comments, but you understood he was reeling from the shock of everything, especially from the details regarding aaron.
you bite your tongue when kenjii speaks ill of warner. defending him would only make you look naive, plus you couldn't deny the others had their reasoning for disliking the guy. you would end up sounding like delalieu.
"so what, you like the guy now? god, don't tell me your gullible enough to fall for it just because he's the first guy to show interest in you."
his words cut deep into you, but you don't respond and change the subject back to getting to the house. you didn't want to argue after being so happy kenji is alive. but damn did you want to give him a shove with your powers.
your spirits lifted as soon as you reached the destination. you pull kenji to the front door and urge him to open it. he knocks and confirms his identity before it's opened by winston, who was shocked to see you.
you greeted him quickly, feeling bad, but your main focus was your sister. next you see alia, castle, brendan, lily and alia. (all frozen to their spots as soon as they noticed you). when you see james you give him a tight hug, thankful for his well-being.
adam and juliette walked out of the kitchen engaged in conversation, not noticing you at first. then kenji drew their attention with a cough.
both of you were paralyzed at first; you were the first to break and jump at her with tears and an overbearing hug. she was quick to return it, then the both of you started crying in relief to see each other after thinking the other was dead.
"i'm so sorry for how we ended things, you had a right to be upset and i was a bad sister for not taking your feelings into account. "
"no, i'm the one who overreacted. i should've came with you the moment you told me you felt something was wrong."
"okay we get it elsa and anna; you're both very happy to see each other. please, no more tears."
you both pulled away, laughing softly at your dramatics. you turned and gave adam a much quicker hug, him happy to see you breathing.
with greeting out of the way, everyone's attention was turned back to you, particularly how you survived. you took a deep breath, and retold everything you told kenji, leaving out intimate details about aaron and you. everyone reacted similarly to the way kenji had.
the room then filled with different questions and thoughts, all voices one another, reminding you of listening to different people's thoughts at the same time. they all started assuming the worst in warner, and this time you did defend him - but it only made you look guilty.
the subject turned over to what was the next plan of action. castle was out of it, so he provided no help. adam was the first to protest any sort of fight, his concern for james overshadowing. juliette was on the fence about it for adam's sake, but you knew she wanted to fight against the reestablishment like everyone else, if not more. especially after all they had put the two of you through.
the conversation barely got past arguments before the front door was suddenly brought down. everyone, besides you, held up weapons to attack the intruder - you held up your hands, ready to use your power if necessary. but then you recognized the intruder quickly - aaron.
you ran over in front of him and advised everyone to stand down, but they didn't listen, they were too focused on the fact aaron had arrived.
you readied yourself to lower their weapons yourself, but then aaron made a move of his own and flung all the guns across the room with levitation.
"i was gonna do that.." you mumbled quietly to yourself.
"apologies, amor, i'll let you get them next time."
everyone else was stunned, you explained aaron's gift, but it was still a shock to see. a few banters are exchanged, but aaron, uncaring as ever, ignores them and proceeds to grab your arm so the two of you can leave. however, you stop him, not wanting to leave on bad terms.
you informed everyone that aaron was on your side, and they were understandably doubtful to believe it, but as they noticed how he acted with you, it became more believable.
you took the chance to try to persuade everyone to stand up again against the rebellion. juliette and kenji were the first to side with you, and slowly everyone followed along, adam and ian being the ones more reluctant. you could respect adam for thinking of james and juliette, and ian was just an asshole, but he was also mourning. in a turn of events, castle chimed in with his support.
aaron, not thrilled about the new members of your alliance, announced the two of you would be leaving. juliette protested, not wanting to be away from you after she just got you back.
part of you longed to lay on the comfortable bed back at the base, but you needed to stay with your team. so, you made an agreement aaron could return for you the next day.
"so i'll come back for you tomorrow? thirteen hundred hours."
"thirteen hundred hours? like from now?"
"it means one o'clock."
"... one o'clock is not thirteen hundred hours from now."
aaron was holding back a laugh, juliette was just as confused, and kenji physically facepalmed.
aaron eventually left after you reassured him you'd be fine. ian was of no help as he kept insulating it was better if you left. adam stormed off not long after, juliette following to calm him. she returned looking dejected and assumed she and adam fought. kenji suggested the three of you go out for a walk, although it was late.
during the night stroll, all three of you got emotions off your chest. kenji's feelings about the whole situation, juliette's issues with adam (they were still technically broken up) , and your turmoil with warner. kenji was somewhat holding back, but you knew he was just trying to hold up a strong facade.
as you disclosed your confusion and feelings, kenji had many questions, from disbelief, and juliette mainly just patiently listened and remained silent.
"so you like the guy, for what his personality? totally has nothing to do with his looks?
"hey, i'm not shallow! ...aaron just happens to be gifted with excellent looks."
"hearing you call him aaron is so weird. and i'm not judging you if you did. seeing adam shirtless is probably what drew juliette to him at the start."
"hey!"
the light banter made the solemn conversation easier to talk through. it was nice to be always from everything for a bit, and just act like friends.
you three returned back, kenji walked to the door first, and juliette grabbed your wrist to stop you from following him.
"i just want to talk to you alone real quick. about warner,.. or aaron, whatever you call him."
you held your breath, partly ready for her to possibly start another argument.
"i know you're confused about what you feel for him still, but i need you to know if you decide you love him - i'll support you. i don't want it to get in the way our bond. after everything that's happened... i realized there no time to waste on petty little things, especially about guys. all that should matter is we're always here for each other."
you give each other another heartfelt and tearful hug; glad kenji wasn't there to comment on how sappy and emotional it is.
"so, just between us sisters, do you think you love him?"
you laugh, and open the truth of your heart of her.
back inside, you all prepared for him or, as aaron called it a "slumber party." wasn't too far off since everyone besides james, adam, and castle slept on the ground.
your place was between kenji and juliette, each of you having your own pillow and blanket. winston and brendan bantered a bit about kicking faces before the turns finally went out.
"kenji, i know it will be incredibly hard, but keep your hands to yourself."
"you wish. you should be telling your sister that, she's basically all over me every night."
"shut up."
the next day brought a lot of drama. the day started off late, leaving little time to discuss before aaron arrived. another fight between adam and juliette set off. the issue being that aaron was coming back, which adam was completely against. he had been fine with your stay, but he wouldn't compromise for letting him return. adam gave an ultimatum, if you brought warner he would essentially kick you out.
juliette went to your defense and partly aaron's for your benefit. this only set off adam more. kenji tried his hand at intervening but only got backlash from adam, who stormed off outside after. everyone else stayed quiet, but you could tell one or two silently agreed with adam.
you didn't wanna stir any more trouble than needed, so you started preparing yourself to go, clicking the little mechanism aaron gave you a couple times to ensure it worked.
brendan, winston, castle, lily insisted you stay as well. james also gave a small plead for you to remain. juliette believed she could still talk some sense into adam.
it felt great to have their support, but at the same time, you felt bad for having to divide everyone into teams, yours or adam's. instead of building a team, you were tearing one apart.
before you knew it, the newly fixed door was again slammed open by the same intruder from the day before. aaron barged in, almost of breath and distressed. you thought something happened to him because of how disarranged he looked.
he locked his gaze on you and speedily grabbed you in his arms, cupping your face and scanning you up and down for any injuries. you were a bit embarrassed as everyone was a witness to aaron fussing over your well-being.
"did you run here?"
"of course, you beeped the pager."
you assured him you were alright and turned back to everyone with faces of incredulity.
"woah, this is... freaky." winston began.
"i worked for this guy for more than a year and never even saw him smile."
you explained to aaron that you couldn't stay at the house any longer but couldn't leave everyone else either. he offers to have them stay in the training area, but kenji declines, needing a better offer. juliette sides with kenji, the rest don't fully trust warner, so they need reassurance.
you couldn't bare the thought of leaving everyone again, so you pleaded to aaron to give in to their demands, willing to compromise whatever. you were happy and a little shocked, along with everyone else, when he accepted the terms.
"i'll return tomorrow at fourteen hundred ho-" he sees your confused face again, "2 o'clock. i really must educate you on military time, amor"
"or you could just say the time on a clock like the average person."
aaron takes your hand and guides you back to the tank to make your way back to the base before anyone notes his disappearance.
you express your gratitude for his help, and he responds by saying there's not need, he would do whatever to ease your pain. he also partly owed it to you for being so dismissive when you believed your friends were alive.
"i know they all judge you right now, and maybe they always will. but, i do believe you're a good person, and sure, you have flaws, but who doesn't - i am certainly no saint. i don't want to fix you...just want to make you see yourself in a better light like i do." your final words before falling into a slumber against the window.
you return back to the base the way you came in with delalieu's help. your both back in aaron's room, not having said a word to each other since the tank. aaron's started to ask questions about what had happened back at adam's house. you briefly told him about the drama about adam not wanting you there if you were with warner.
aaron became upset, not liking how adam treated you, and reassured you he would harm him if you wanted him to. you quickly assure him that you didn't care about it, you weren't going to beg to stay where you weren't wanted. you were mostly concerned about what it had done to whatever relationship was left between juliette and adam. she obviously loved him, but she couldn't hold herself back for him either.
you go silent at the mention of juliette, remembering your last private conversation. aaron, being able to easily feel your emotions, pick up and it and presses for information.
"it's just.. she asked me if i loved you."
aaron's breath hitches, "what was your response."
"i told her, 'love is a strong word. i'm not even sure i fully understand it. but i think...no i know. i'm falling for him.' "
aaron didn't respond, he got up and went to his office, shutting the door behind him. you weren't sure what it meant. and you didn't see him for the rest of the day.
you couldn't sleep that night; your mind was doing circles in anticipation of the group's arrival tomorrow.
you got up with the intention of solely getting a glass of water, but then heard a loud noise come from the direction aaron's office.
wanting to make sure he was okay, you walked in without notice. the door was already halfway open, so you figured it was alright.
the room was bigger than your childhood home's living room; it was filled with different seats of furniture, books, shelf, etc. aaron was at his large desk - his shirt discarded and only wearing slacks and socks.
aaron's brushes you off, telling you to go to bed, but your focus is on a small jar in his hands. you ask what it is, but he avoids answering, so you grab the object yourself. he attempts to get it from you, but you move away - deja vu to when aaron wouldn't return your journal to you. it felt nice to be on the flip side of it for once.
you read the label and understood it was a medicine. then it clicked; it was for his scars. and he was embarrassed about it. it was kind of cute.
he confirms it's for his back, so you nicely offer to do it for him since he seemed to have trouble reaching it. he was obviously self-conscious no matter how much he denied it, and you told him it didn't matter; you'd already seen them. but he kept turning his back away from you. you were getting suspicious that the scars were only part of the reason he was hiding.
you got annoyed and impulsively used your power to keep him sat and finally make his back face you. you could apologize later.
then you saw it. yes, his scars were still there, but on top of that were your wonky star doodles. the ones you drew in his cells two weeks ago in his cell at omega point.
you were confused about how they were still there, darker than you remember. the pen you used was lousy; you would know since you used it to write and the ink always smudged. the pen ink was also blue, and this was black. the skin around it was also freshly red.
"wait.. is this tattooed?"
his silence confirmed it. you were speechless. he tattooed your silly little doodles. he needed the medicine to numb the pain of the ink.
"why would you do this?"
"figured it your mark was better than the ones my dad left me."
"aaron."
"it was the first time i looked at my back and smiled."
you think your heart burst on the spot.
"god, i would've made them better if i knew you were gonna mark it."
"they're perfect." god, you were ready to melt.
you compose yourself and insist you put on the medicine since it was your tattoo design that's causing him slight pain. he didn't protest this time. you applied it in silence, then worked up the courage to ask about his scars.
aaron was very hesitant, you were ready to be shut down, but then he opened up to you. his scars being a 'birthday gift' from his father. it was heartbreaking to hear and almost brought tears to your eyes, but you knew pity was the last thing he wanted.
"when you saw them back in my cell, i waited to see that look of repulse on your face, but it never came. you observed them so carefully like they were the most interesting thing to you. then you had the gall to say it was similar to abstract art."
"well, it's true. they're not ugly, and you're certainly not repulsive. the scars are like a show of strength for everything you've been through. they're yours; only you decide what they represent. anyone who thinks differently is a total loser."
"please, stop."
"i'm sorry, did i say something wr-"
"i love you. so much that the first thing i did when returning here after escaping omega point was getting delalieu to tattoo my skin because your marks faded. i didn't even let myself wash off in fear they'd disappear before i got a chance to preserve them. i couldn't wipe the smile off my face whenever i looked at it through a mirror. it always reminded me of you. our moments. our last kiss. i burn for you greatly, and you don't even realize it."
"aaron..."
"don't."
"you know how i feel. but i'm still figuring it out, this is all new to me, and i want to get to know you better-"
"please. just go." and you did.
the following day, right on schedule, aaron goes to pick up the group while you stay behind waiting in the training facility that he briefly gave you a tour of.
the group arrived, and you happily greeted them as they looked around the place in awe. aaron began to go over rules and boundaries for the group. after the previous night, you were unsure about where you stood with warner, so you decided to give him some space and stand with the rest of the group. as he spoke, he threw not-so subtle glances your way, making you confused about whether he was upset with you or not.
aaron ventured off, everyone was setting up their items, and you separated with kenji and juliette. they book had look more distressed upon their arrival. apparently, juliette took one last chance to try and convince adam to come along, he didn't budge, saying he had to protect james and encouraged juliette to stay as well. it resulted in an argument; eventually, he respected her decision to fight - but it would mean the end for them. you comforted your sister through her heartbreak, adam had been a big part of her life, even a bit of yours. so to say goodbye must've been hard for her.
kenji also tried to persuade adam, but it escalated, and the two started throwing harsh words at each other. you knew adam was his friends, whether they both acknowledged it or not, and after omega point, you were sure kenji didn't want to lose anyone else. leaving james behind made it worse.
the direction of conversation then turned to you, and you were originally going to deny any conflict, but kenji and juliette picked up on the tension between you and aaron.
juliette starts, "so, what happened with warner?"
"don't know what you mean."
kenji and juliette give each other a mutual glance, " we aren't blind; the guy kept looking at you as if you'd killed his puppy. like seriously, there could've been a rain cloud over him with how much he was sulking."
you opened up to the happenings of last night, leaving out too personal information about warner, and how you weren't sure what to do now. kenji lost his mind at the bit about the tattoo, this new side of warner still weirding him out.
"i thought you were into him?"
"i mean, i am. it's just all so confusing. i'm not trying to string him along, i just want to truly know him before i could want more with him. it feels like he knows every single thing about me, while i'm barely starting to paint a picture. or maybe he only thinks he loves me or he's only interested in me because of my gift."
"dude, everything he has done for us so far is all because of you. what kind of guy tattoo's a stupid drawing someone drew on their back? and i swear he gets cartoon heart eyes when he looks at you too long. i know i called you naive for believing it, but that was before i saw first hand how intimate his feelings are for you."
"he's right, y/n. think about if he only cared about your gift, he would've been treating us the same, after all, he brought both of us in. sure, he acts decent towards me, but i'm pretty sure it has more to do with the fact we're sisters. you don't play nice with someone's family unless you really like them."
you were silent as you absorbed both their perspectives.
kenji sighs, "damn, i need a love life."
"interested in someone else."
"technically single, but i'd choose the asylum over you."
"i'm starting to miss when you both were meek and quiet."
after that friendly therapy session, you regained your focus on the important task, formulating a plan to overtake anderson. you had a few ideas, some you talked about with aaron, but a seventeen-year-old girl can only do so much on her own, so that's why you bring in your sister, who is also seventeen. as the two of you went through essentially the same trauma, she had as much right to be a big part of this as you.
aaron came back hours later, and everyone gathered around and took a seat somewhere. to your surprise, aaron sat down right the to you. the tension is so much worse side by side. knowing aaron could read what you felt didn't make it better.
you began to illustrate the details of the plan, juliette helping fill in and explain points. the goal is to get anderson to sector 45; to do that, you had to take over sector 45. getting people and soldiers to rebel was going to be the trickiest part, and much of the group wasn't on board that it could work.
"we're going to have to show them our strengths, i'll help them see our strength." you explain.
"and if they shoot us?" ian counters..
juliette shrugs, "then don't do it, i'm sure my sister and i are capable of being amazing by ourselves."
"real humble , j."
brendan speaks up, "so, we've got somewhat of a synopsis of juliette's gift, but, no offense y/n, what is it you can do besides read minds?"
it was true; almost everyone wasn't aware of other capabilities you possessed. you didn't like to divulge your gift much back at omega point, kenji, juliette, and castle knowing the most. unlike juliette, who had many different events where she showed her amazing strength, and you were sure they saw more when she practiced at adam's house while you were separated.
you briefly revealed more about your powers, mind-reading, telekinesis, and your ongoing training in telepathic defense. you admitted to losing control a few times as well. the group looked more amazed as you went on.
"prove it."
"yeah, c'mon dude, show us."
everyone else started egging you on to make a show of your powers; you even saw aaron look interested in wanting to see it. you gave in, and asked aaron for permission to throw some objects around, he nodded.
you started levitating different objects and throwing a few around. kenji started begging for you to lift him, so you did - then winston and brendan kept begging to go next. you showcased a small shield of energy you were able to produce. lastly, they wanted to see your telepathic projection, but you explained it would involve harming one of them, so you shut it down.
"so like, you can do all that too right? since you can steal powers?" winston questions warner.
"yes, if i wanted to i could take hers, or any of your powers and use it."
you cough into your hand, "no one's better than the original, though."
"so the two of you together can basically can..."
"take over the world?"
"...was going to say kick serious ass, but you're not wrong."
warner doesn't respond, but you can see him holding back a smile.
the thought of warner taking powers was eerie to the group, but you reassured them of your faith and trust in aaron. then the conversation redirects to the plan. castle questions of what is supposed to happen if you do win, such as who is going to lead.
"i will." juliette pulls you by the arm next to her, "and y/n will help me."
the room falls silent. even warner is still. your head snaps to your sister, that was not a topic the two of you discussed. nor did you know it was up for discussion. you, of course, didn't express your surprise, you couldn't show doubt when this whole meeting relied on trust. juliette's speech on the new world motivated everyone to follow through with the battle plan, you silently supported it, but in your mind, you didn't think it was the best idea for you both to lead a whole country. you think juliette forgets just how young and inexperienced you both are.
but you were sure this was a problem that could be mended later, right?
aaron and you were alone in his room again, the silence so deafening, you mentally cringed. you attempted to start the conversation on his thoughts about the plan, but he began to brush you off. frustrated, you call him out on his recent behavior.
"why is it all or nothing with you? i didn't reject you- all i said was i want to know you better, i saw you in a bad light for a good while. i want to see the positive just as much."
"or maybe you're just expecting too much from me."
"why are you being so stubborn!"
"because you being disgusted with what you learn, would end me."
he walked out after, a common occurrence, it seemed, these past days.
you vented all your frustrations into training the next day. you told yourself you wouldn't focus on warner, no matter how good he looked in sweatpants, and instead use your pent-up energy to master your powers.
it paid off well; you got closer to creating a shield. but maybe a little too well, since you accidentally launched kenji across the room with your energy force. he got you back off, turning invisible and tripping you. juliette concentrated on moving her dumbbell with the force of will, but she struggled. reminded you a lot of your training at omega point. you offered her tips on what worked for you, and kenji coached.
at some point, you went to the back to drink from your water bottle, unintentionally near where warner was bench pressing. then suddenly you heard someone yell 'get down'. it all happened in a flash, you turned around a bit late, and the rock wall behind you came crumbling down at you. you quickly attempted to lift your hands, levitate most of the impact and braced yourself. suddenly, instead of your body colliding with dozen of sharp rocks, you were surrounded in bubbles. you turned the rumble into fucking bubbles.
you stood mouth wide open in shock for a minute, the people around you just as amazed. aaron was the first to run to you, asking if you were alright, and you nodded, still a bit shocked. he expressed his astoundment at your newfound skill.
juliette then came up to you and profusely apologized, and you assured her you were okay and accidents happen.
"i can't count how many times i almost knocked out castle with things during my training. you'll get the hang of it. plus, i'm sure aaron had trouble learning to control power too."
"oh, no. though i've always been very good at everything i do."
you smack his chest, "you are seriously no help."
you continue to train very hard for the rest of the week, your muscle will likely permanently ache in pain.
you and aaron hadn't gotten much better, you really did try to reach out so many times, but if he wasn't going to cooperate, why waste energy.
he made a habit of intentionally putting his focus on things around the base and working late, so he wouldn't see you until you were already asleep.
if things ended badly between you two, i'd be because of his own stupidity, not for your lack of trying nor the judgment of his character.
other than that, all was well. until kenjii decided to casually drop a bomb that adam and james were coming to the base. juliette started freaking out, and you weren't sure where you and adam stood, but you were excited to see james again.
adam arrived, and tensions between the ex-couple were high. they both were cordial but weren't sure how to act around one another. adam went up and apologized to you for his treatment, and you accepted it because he was once your friend, and you hated grudges. james excitedly greeted you, and you gave him a small tour.
then aaron showed up, ignoring adam, but he and james went back in forth in exchanges. it was very entertaining to watch, and aaron pointed out your enjoyment.
"why do you call her amor?"
"it means love in spanish."
"so, do you love her?"
"why, do you?"
"n-no! she's really pretty- i mean, i like her...no, ugh, she's like a million years older than me!"
"hey! i'm not prehistoric!"
you cut the exchange short, grabbing james on the shoulders and dragging him away, "how about we go back t kenji while i explain to you age numbers..."
you and juliette got upgrades in suits. yours similar to your former, but with minor changes. your color was now a darker red with accents of black, your coat was now high to low with slides for the sides of your legs to show, new knee-high combat coots, and new long fingerless gloves. yours and juliette's new material was made to accommodate your powers.
for training, you watched juliette and kenji go back in forth in combat - kenji mostly won due to technique, but juliette overpowered him a few times.
aaron came up to you, and insisted the two of you train in combat together. you rejected his offer; combat was not your forte, you were repeatedly told by kenji many times. so you just stuck to using your powers. but aaron wouldn't back off.
"it's important to learn combat, amor."
"if i run into a bad guy i'll just fling him away."
"and when you can't use your powers, what happens?"
you were going to argue that wouldn't happen, but knew it wouldn't suffice for him, so you just gave in, so he would shut up.
it was no shocker that he easily blocked your punches and stopped any attack. he even had the audacity to be amused at how badly you were doing.
"wow, you are quite terrible."
"okay, i get it i suck. can i go back to my training?"
"c'mon, amor, don't give up so easily. punch me."
as much as you were annoyed, you didn't want to physically hurt him. aaron laughed when you told him that. that itself, ticked you off. and it did not help that now you had an audience invested in the interaction.
you still didn't relent, aaron was a bit disappointed, but he focused on fixing your form.
you don't know if it was the fact aaron laughed, his constant comments, or all your pent-up frustration, but something came over you. while aaron was distracted with giving walking you through hitting an opponent, you hit him - hard. you might've used some of your powers to make the hit stronger, but he didn't need to know that.
aaron staggered back, shockingly caught off guard. you honestly expected him to block it like your other ones; but no you managed to land a hit on his cheekbone area, hitting some of the side of his nose. your poor form made for your knuckles to hurt badly.
everyone stopped what they were doing; even you froze. kenji in the back, trying not to laugh. aaron then recovered, his land touching the side of his face. his face didn't show anger, pain, nor surprise - he was smiling in admiration.
"oh my god, i'm so sorry!"
"no, don't apologize, amor. i'm very content being the first to experience your strength firsthand."
you and aaron ended up cutting practice short and went to the infirmary. you helped treat the large bruise on his face you'd given him as a small apology, and he wrapped your sprained knuckles and partly chasted you for incorrect hand form. was he looking to get punched again?
the following day, aaron woke you up earlier than your normal routine. he mentioned an opportunity for you and juliette to finally get practice outside of the base, and you quickly agreed. you asked why so suddenly, and then he disclosed he was going to visit his mother. it was her birthday, he explained. he didn't say much after that and went over that kenji will keep you and juliette invisible after he leaves.
but you couldn't help your curiosity and asked a little about his mother. hearing the story of his ring broke your heart. the only gifts you got were when you and juliette exchanged homemade gifts for your shared birthday, but the story made you appreciate that tradition much more.
"i think it's good you still visit her."
"is it?"
"it is. knowing you have someone there is sometimes enough. whenever i remembered i had my sister with me, it made the asylum not completely terrible. and around you, i feel like i achieve anything."
juliette, kenji, and you, invisible, met with warner at his tank. you didn't even need to tell him of your presence before he helped you into the tank and got on the driver side to start it.
"how'd you..." you ask, confused.
"i can sense your presences. especially yours."
"woah, freaky. what's mine feel like? peanut better?" he got ignored.
you settled on the opposite window side, juliette next to you, and kenji next to aaron. kenji started shuffling around, uncomfortable.
"dude, y/n, switch seats with me."
"what why?"
"your boyfriend is touching my leg."
"you flatter yourself." aaron interjects.
"c'mon hurry up! i think he's about to knife me..."
"just switch with juliette. it's easier."
"no way, if i'm gonna move, i might as well get the window seat."
you roll your eyes (not that he can see), and the two of you begin a messy movement of bodies to switch seats. poor juliette, stuck in the middle, getting hit by an occasional limb.
"ow, you just hit me in the face-" juliette complains.
"sorry, i'm trying my best-"
"now you just hit me!" you exclaim.
"oh my god, let me just-"
"kenji!"
kenji was the first to get to his new seat, you were situated over both him and juliette. kenji, tired of your leg in his face, shoved you with brief warning. and in an attempt to stable yourself you put your hands out on aaron's lap, but one hand missed. and landed on his groin. aaron visibly flinched and put his lips together in a straight line to contain his painful expression.
you gasped and hastily moved your hands in a panic, then to make matters worse - you fell face first in his lap. you were so happy to be invisible at the moment.
aaron takes a sharp intake of air, and his knuckles turn white from how tight he grips the wheel. you scramble you sit correctly, accidentally putting a hand on his groin again before finally in the seat. the silence was deafening.
aaron promptly dropped you both off at an empty site and bid you goodbye. you gave him some last words for comfort that you noticed he appreciated. then he went off.
sometime later, it was time for the four of you to meet up again. the practice had been somewhat successful. there were many miscalculations with practicing and being invisible. the three of you kept stumbling into each other, having the wrong place meant, and arguing over who was right. but ignoring that, you did get some practice in there.
aaron, however, was unusually late. it worried you. kenji and juliette didn't think much of it. but since you knew his location, you sensed there was something wrong. you asked both of them to check on him to ensure he was already, and you three walked to the house. you avoided mentioning aaron's mother.
you asked juliette and kenji to wait outside as you went inside.knji begrudgingly agreed, ensuring he could keep the invisibility up inside, too. juliette bid you to be careful and return as soon as possible.
you saw a few different pictures of aaron with his mother as a child. you looked through different rooms until you found him. he was sitting on the floor with his knees to his chest, his frame trembling. his mother died; you put together. you quickly knelt down and gave him a hug that he accepted. you let him hold you tightly as he sobs sorrowfully. it was painful to witness, so you let him cry onto your shoulder for however long he needed.
an hour later you returned, kenji and juliette already in the tank, no invisibility. you didn't need for them to say anything to know they had questions, so you avoided their gaze. next to you, aaron held your hand the whole way back
his mother's death reminded you of his family, the unknown fact to him that he shares blood with adam and james. you wanted him to know, but truly, you didn't want any part of that mess. knowing was already knawing at you as it was. juliette disagreed; she thought adam needed to tell aaron.
you thought leaving aaron alone was the best decision. you even planned to spend the night where everyone else was. but as you were packing a bag, he stopped you. aaron grabs your arm and turns you to look at him.
"you're right. i am holding back. i was telling you how much you were in denial, but it was me who was holding back. you've always seen me in a light like no one has. i've never thought of myself as even a decent man until you came around. and it scares me. so much. i'm afraid of disappointing you, and you'll be disgusted with me, see the monster i see every day in the mirror. but if giving more of myself is all it takes to be yours, then it's done. you can learn every crevice of my soul if it means you'll stay with me."
you knew it then, "i love you." you are in love.
he grabs your face and kisses you in less than a second. the kiss being so loving and careful, he takes his time memorizing your lips. he lifts you in the air prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist. from there, the kiss molds into passion and need. before you know it, you're both lying on the bed with him hovering over you.
aaron groans into your mouth, "say it again."
you softly giggle, "i love you."
"god, you have no idea what you just unleashed, amor."
your stomach is doing a million glips. your entire body is in frenzy. you're ready to have a heart attack there and then. it was only just the beginning as well.
"lift your hips for me, amor."
"c'mon, angel, don't get shy on me now."
"i'm afraid you're never getting rid of me now mi amor."
very long night.
you slept through most of the morning, only woken up by aaron laying kissing down your neck. then he started going lower down your body. any sleep you had was now gone.
"aaron.. what are you doing."
"nothing."
"liar."
"shhh.. you just lay there, i'm just going to enjoy my breakfast."
the man was insaitable; you were sure you weren't ever gonna get out of bed that day. but eventually, you did. had to dedicate half an hour to walking properly again.
you went to you rfinal fitting for suits, and the new look was incredible. juliette traded the purple for a new black suit - kenji not liking his color stolen.
"why am i the only one in color now?"
"so, you can get spotted and shot at first while the rest of us get away." kenji answers.
"you're the worst."
aaron walked up behind you and whispered in your ear, "how quickly can you take this off?"
you smack his chest and give a playful disapproving look.
"i mean, it definitely can stay on, too."
"aaron!"
the bliss of everything helped ease your nerves for the following day. you were sat in aaron's room going over the plan for the millionth time. aaron kept reassuring you you'd be perfect and worrying will do nothing but install fear.
"it's just... what if it backfires. what if no one listens or surrenders?"
"it wont and they will."
"you're right. i'll just tell them my scary boyfriend will come after them."
"for you? always." he kisses your cheek, "i like the sound of you saying boyfriend, but scary?"
"well, everyone besides me is pretty scared of you."
"and what about you, what do you think of me?"
"i think you're cute."
"cute? yeah, let me show you just how cute, i can be."
aaron can never take his off of you for too long.
the next day, you, juliette, and the others stood in front of sector 45. both the people and the soldiers gathered there, all of their eyes fixed on your group. it was like the world's largest show and tell.
aaron started it off with a speech, informing everyone of the truth and the fact you and juliette were alive and well. then your sister took over, and directly told the crowd the plan to destroy the reestablishment, you gave a few words of your own, but juliette did most of the talking much to your relief.
then the questions from the crowd starting, so it was time for the group to showcase their powers. finally it was down to juliette and you.
juliette climbed to a building s good hundred feet from the ground, then jumped off and landed - making the ground tremble and shatter beneath her.
"how the hell do i top that?" you whisper to yourself.
with a comforting look from aaron, and a deep breath, you stepped into the front. you looked for a fairly easy but impressive thing to lift and spotted a very tall tower. bingo.
using your ability, you began carefully levitating it above the ground. you closed your hand into a fist, and the tower began breaking into bits. people began to panic as the rubble started coming toward them, but suddenly, you transformed the pieces into butterflies flying around the people. everyone looking around in amazement.
you took the biggest deep breath once you were done. very happy your practice paid off, and you didn't accidentally end up killing a crowd.
the crowd cheered and roared. the presentation proved to be successful because they got on board with destroying the reestablishment. the soldiers surrendered and joined the rebellion.
back in the training room, everyone was overjoyed with the success of overtaking sector 45, but now came the hardest part. winning a war.
juliette ran straight to you, attacking you in a very strong hug. so strong you had to tell her to chill on the power a bit. she apologized and released you. the recent events were still reeling in your mind, not fully comprehended.
"oh my god, juliette what did we just do?"
"we just started a war my dearest sister."
and now you had to wait to face anderson in likely a day or two. he almost killed you last time. but you wouldn't let him get lucky again.
the group, minus aaron, sat in the training room discussing what was next. one talk to another led to the topic of anderson.
"i've never even met the guy. wonder what he's like?"
"he's handsome. it's actually insane how evil, but striking he is." you blurt out.
juliette agrees, but the group looks at you weirdly.
"dude, you just called your boyfriend's dad attractive."
"what? i don't mean it in a weird way."
"hey, at least you've got a backup option if the first anderson doesn't work out. "
you throw a pillow at kenji's head.
then the topic of anderson's name came about, and that's when the trouble began. adam answered his name was paris; but suddenly, aaron arrived in the room, overhearing the conversation.
aaron put him against the wall, interrogated him on how he knew, and adam not saying anything. you couldn't take it anymore, so you yelled out the truth.
"he's your bother!"
aaron didn't believe it. juliette kept pressuring adam until he finally confessed. everyone gave the two of them space to work things out as everyone else busied themselves. when all was on steady terms, aaron sat with you.
"you should've told me."
"i know, i'm sorry. but it really wasn't my secret to tell."
"i had a right to know."
"c'mon, if you had some sort of family secret of mine, would you tell me right away?"
he hesitates, "you're right. you didn't want to get involved, i understand that."
you tell yourself it didn't matter, but you couldn't help but ask, did he deliberately avoid answering. you brush it off, probably nothing.
you returned to aaron's room, you both talked about the brother situation more, and aaron mentioned spending more time with both kent's. you were happy to see he was content to learn about his new family and want to see them more.
"this is great. i'm happy when you're happy. it's deserve more close people in your life."
"but i have you, and that's enough."
"very sweet, but family relationships are different. i was fortunate to have a sister in my life. what if my mother hadn't had the both of us, juliette not being my sister? seems unimaginable.."
aaron goes rigid, being in his lap, you notice immediately, "you alright?"
he relaxes and nods, "this whole situation has me a bit disorientated. enough brother talk. let me remind you why our relationship has much better advantages than other ones.."
a full night of sleep was just a foreign concept at this point.
it took one day for anderson to come to the sector. you all had luckily kind of prepared for it, so there was a plan set that you all were to follow. kenji, juliette, and you were responsible for going to the ship to deal with anderson while the rest took care of the matter on land.
before separating, you said your farewell and good luck to aaron. you tried to cry when saying goodbye to james and promising all would be fine. lastly, you gave aaron a kiss, and you promised each other to be safe.
"i have no doubts that you will succeed. my father can't even fathom the power you possess."
as you three board the port, you notice the massive groups of soldiers. juliette has the idea of you pushing them into the water with your powers, which you do.
you each take turns getting onto the ship, 5-second gap each. however, once you get inside, you can't find neither juliette or kenji. still invisible, you take your chances going through different doors, trying not alert soldiers.
but it fails because bullets began shooting in your direction. you run as fast as you can; unlike juliette, you are not invincible neither was your suit, at least not entirely.
with your invisibility gone, you get cornered with at least 7 soldiers, armed. your instincts kick in, and you start throwing men and attacking them with your energy. one soldier begins shooting at you when you're caught off guard. you hold your hand out as a protection and close your eyes, but you see the bullet is stopped - by your shield. you hadn't even made an effort to create it yet, and it presented itself like it was an automatic presence.
after witnessing that, the guard abandoned the ship and ran off. you couldn't blame him; you doubt he got paid enough to deal with all this.
you attention is shifted when you heard loud crashes and screams. you recognize them as your friend and your sister. you rush toward the room where the sound was originating.
you see kenji on the ground in pain and juliette not too far off; she's crouched down, clutching her head, and struggling to stand. you spot anderson, with another man, who you recognize is causing juliette's pain with his sonic wave gift.
you focus your energy on the boy, focusing on hurting him. then he stops his pressure waves and starts howling in pain, crouching down like juliette had. you were in a trance, channeling all your energy into hurting the guy, then - you snapped his neck.
you ran to juliette first, helping her get up, then you checked on kenji who was in worse shape.
anderson drew his gun, and started shooting bullets at you both, but it simply just bounced off. you and juliette drew your own weapons; you looked at each other and knew what had to happen next.
you focus your energy on anderson, his legs then collapse under him. he starts scrambling on the ground. juliette steps on his hands - shattering his borns with her power.
"remember that lesson on justice getting served?"
you shoot him in the chest, and juliette aims for his head.
4 shots - one for adam, one for aaron, one for juliette, and one for you.
it was a blur after that. sara and sonya were found and attended to kenji who was luckily not in any fatal condition, he would be okay.
it felt like you were experiencing someone out-of-body, unreal. juliette went up to the speaker system, capable of speaking to the entirety of the sector. she announced the end of the reestablishment and its new leader.
he was dead. it was over.
still bloodied and bruised, you stood on the tallest tower of the compound. you hadn't talked to anyone; everyone too busy rejoicing. but you were still digesting everything that had just happened.
you look over the new land and wonder what could be in store next.
you're not surprised when juliette and aaron find you, they know you too well at this point. they don't say anything and each take a side next to you. aaron puts a hand around your waist and tugs you toward him.
"the entire rest of the world is coming after us now, you know."
"i'd love to see them try." juliette says confidently.
"i believe as long as our bonds remain strong, we can overcome anything." though. that wasn't how you really felt.
you didn't want to damper a glorious day. but you couldn't help the pit forming inside of your stomach, telling you this was only the beginning of a treacherous path.
but nothing come could destroy the bonds you forged, right?
@whatsupb18 @letspretendimnottrash @heart-an0n @mrsspector-grant @kikilarast10 @nina357 @lupinswolfsbanes (tysm for the support)
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sillyblues · 2 years ago
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the ocean and the wind. (6)
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ੈ✩‧₊˚ synopsis: tonowari is the ocean and ronal is the wind. where does it leave you?
ੈ✩‧₊˚ notes: yooo i'm so sorry for the super late update, school got me tied up again aksldnakjd i speedran writing this so if there's any mistakes i am so sorry!! anyways the next part will be the last part and can i just say holy shit??? totw is finally ending and i gen don't know how to feel about this. anyways ive read so much of your replies and i am so honoured and flattered that many of you love this story! i am kissing your forehead as you read this btw xoxo as usual, pls let me know your thoughts and which parts were your favourite! till next time!!
part 1 ✩ part 2 ✩ part 3 ✩ part 4 ✩ part 5 ✩ part 6 (here!) ✩ part 7 (final part)
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Tonowari is at a loss as he watches you ignore him once more. He talked to you before, he asked you where you had been as you seemingly disappeared into thin air for a couple of weeks. He could not see even a glimpse of your hair and the days without you, his head swam in concern and worry. Have you gone sick? Were you okay? Did something happen? 
As the days without any news from gone by, he grew more distracted from his classes and it was the same for Ronal as well. She grew more anxious and distressed as days went by, and without a proper outlet to let it all out, she grew more emotionally unstable. They could only comfort each other but not once has the turbulence in their heart disappear from the thought of you.
When the news of you that you had gotten sick, he felt helpless. He wanted to come into your home and check in on how you were doing, to be by your side and take care of you in any way he and Ronal can, but your mother had not allowed it. He contemplated sneaking inside your pod to at least see you but there he could not disobey the Healer of the clan. So he sighs inside his heart and with a strained smile, he thanks your mother for the news and offered his best wishes for you to get well soon. When he told Ronal of the news, she frowned deeply and huffed. He watched her gather medicinal herbs and nutritious berries before she gripped them hard in her fist and tears welled in her eyes.
“[Name]... I want to see her,” she said in a brittle voice, her face contorted with longing and anguish for you. Tonowari grabbed her face with both of his hands and pushed the hair out of her face.
“I know,” he leaned his forehead against hers and looks at her straight in the eyes. Her tears slipped and rolled down her cheeks silently and his heart broke apart at the sight of her in pain. Helplessness crept up and weigh his heavy heart down once again. Now, Ronal was hurting and there was nothing he could do. “[Name] is strong. We’ll see them back in no time and they will be healthy when they return.”
“And when they do, they will know of the worry we have for them. The painful agony without them and they will laugh at us, tease us at how much of a baby we two are. They will say how we are just giant children that never really aged with how we cannot handle being without them.” He promised her, promised himself, that everything would be okay and would soon return to normal. Ronal let out a snort and she hid in his embrace.
“They will know of the adoration we have for them,” he whispered against her forehead and kissed the top of her head. Fear comes back and it fills his lungs dark blue. But his passion for you outweighs any of his doubts and suddenly he found himself able to breathe underwater. “We will them of beautiful they are, how they fill us with Atokirina. How much love we carry and drown for her. When [Name] returns, they will finally see how we see them.”
“When [Name] returns.” Ronal murmured against his chest with finality.
Hope swelled in Tonowari’s chest but reality burst it open. When he finally saw you again, relief and joy takes away the heavy weight from his shoulders. When he and Ronal came up to you, they were glad they could finally see you and take the Iknimaya with you. However, they were still worried if you were truly well enough to complete the ritual. But that type of worry soon turned into worry about what have they done wrong for you to avoid them.
You weren’t being the usual you, they noticed. Your happy and cheery aura was nowhere to be seen. Your usual rambles turned into small and curt replies. Your genuine smile turned into one he could not recognize anymore as it did not reach your cheeks. You did not see them anymore. He watched you excuse yourself to your other friends and leave him weak and with so much pain. He watched you the whole time during Iknimaya as you avoided his yearning gazes. He watched you as you continued to hurt him unknowingly, or perhaps you did without giving him and Ronal to ask you why. 
You do not see him anymore.
Now, he looks at you, you who is so alluring as you stand underneath the Cove of Ancestors, adorned with the garments your parents had knitted you that fit you so well and your freshly inked chest that represents your big heart that cared for everyone to which he desperately hopes that he and Ronal are included. The bioluminescent Spirit Tree underwater glows so brightly that it still shines on you. Eywa’s creations swims and streaks of light kisses your skin and he could only think how you leave him breathless of your beauty. He finds himself jealous of the water that you stand in and is closer and touches you the way he wants to be with you.
He recalls how you two promised back then that you two would complete your coming-of-age ceremony together and you two did, just not the way he thought it would. Why do you not see him anymore? Do you hate him? Had he done something wrong? Tonowari wanted to beg you and if he has to be on his knees, he will do so without hesitation as long as you tell him and he will do anything for you to see him once more. But he is the Olo’eyktan’s son, the future chief and has an image to show to everyone, as his father tells him every second. But what use is of his position without you?
Ronal grips his hand and looks at him with worry. He presses his lips into a flat lip, a horrible attempt to send her a smile to ease her concerns for him. She squeezes his hand thrice and his heart throbs at the thought of you.
He remembers how you ignored him before and how everything was just like back then. How you avoided him so and how he thought how you must have despised him. How much pain you gave him in months of you pretending he does not exist. You’re so cruel. So, so cruel. What if this time, you truly despise him now? What if he is nothing to you anymore? Can he take it? Can he truly take it and accept a future without you?
Tonowari’s face is suddenly caressed by Ronal. He looks at her in confusion and she just pushes the hair out of his face.
“When they return, they will know of the adoration we have for them,” she says quietly yet her yearning for you that he also feels is apparent, “We will them of beautiful they are, how they fill us with Atokirina. How much love we carry and drown for her.”
She says what he promised her word for word and he chuckles. He catches her hands and he kisses the knuckles of one of her hands. He squeezes the other hand thrice and finishes his promise to her.
“When [Name] returns, they will finally see how we see them.” No. He cannot just accept that you despise him now without telling him any reason why. He cannot just accept that he is nothing to you so easily. He does not want months of avoidance to happen again and perhaps turn into years of pretending he and Ronal does not exist. He will not give in to the voices that cloud his head for he knows you and you could never hate him. You care about him and Ronal too much and he wishes that it is the same care he and her have for you. Even if he did, he will not risk losing the chance of losing you and a future with you because he loves you. Ronal loves you.
“I see you,” he says to Ronal with eyes full of gratefulness that she snapped him out of his spiralling thoughts and love for her.
“I see you,” she replies with the same eyes that make his heart skip a beat. 
He just hopes that you still see both of them and see them the way they see you.
.
.
.
You are cruel. So, so cruel, Ronal thought as she watches you ignore her. When she talked to you after your disappearance, you acted like there was a barrier between the two of you. You placed a vast distance from her and it tore her heart, clawed it open and you left her to bleed so openly when you left and you didn’t even look back once. The pain from the worry and agony for your safety turned into a burning one that fills her lungs with smoke. Why? What did she do for you to despise being in her presence? Has she scared you as well? Have you grown tired of her as well?
She thought this time would be different. That you would be different. That she has finally found love in Tonowari and you and everything will be all and well. That she wouldn’t hurt anyone again, especially you who is one of the most beloved to her. Was everything a lie then? You said that this time would be different. You said that you were here for her. You said you see her. Was it all just a lie?
No, she silently scoffs to herself. She knows you and she sees you. You are kind. You have a big heart. You see everyone. Perhaps you just didn’t see her anymore. Perhaps it was truly her fault that made you turn away from her just like everybody else.
Disgusting. And so, so pathetic. Had she really not learned anything at all? How could she do that to you unknowingly? How could she hurt you, you who is one of the most precious to her? She does not deserve you, you who is so bright and so full of life and love and all she had done is hurt you. Is this Eywa’s punishment for her? For all the sins she had done in the past, all to return and come back to return in the name of [Name]?
“This time will be different, Ronal.” You said, bringing her face in front of yours. You wiped away her tears and assured her. “I’m here for you.”
“I see you.”
Your words ran through Rona’s mind and oh, despite it all, she still wants you. She still believes that you are different. She still believes that you still see her. She would never give up on you just like you had never given up on her when she didn’t want you to see her. She looks at you in your ethereal beauty that knocks the air out of her and she feels herself falling in love again. You stand there like Eywa’s most treasured creation of all time with the way all of life surrounds you. She looks at the three beads you hold in the palm of your hands and wonders if she and Tonowari would be a part of your waytelem. She finds herself envying the wind that ripples through your hair and clothes and is closer and touches you the way he wants to be with you.
And so, she tells Tonowari and tells him how you will know the wind and the ocean that carries their love for you and grips Tonowari’s hand and would not let him give up on you as well.
“Greetings, brother, Ronal,” a friend of Tonowari’s suddenly cut off her thoughts she lets go of Tonowari’s hand. She nods at him while he greeted him back.
“To what do I owe the pleasure of having my brother here before me?” Tonowari chuckles.
“I just wanted to give you my congratulations for completing Iknimaya, our future Olo’eyktan,” his friend grins to him and nods at her, “And of course, our future Tsahìk.”
She frowns at this. What future Tsahìk? She was not aware of this nor the Tsahìk had personally told her of this. She looks at Tonowari with a questioning gaze.
“Future Tsahìk? When did you learn of this?” his eyebrows press into a flat line while his ears twitched.
“Everyone knows this, brother. In fact, we are all surprised [Name] wasn’t chosen,” he told them and realization dawns on Ronal. Do you know of this as well? Is this the reason why you were avoiding them?
Ronal looks at Tonowari with wide eyes. Tonowari grips her hand and looks at her and tells her with his eyes that they both need to talk to you quickly. Perhaps his friend had sensed that there was something wrong as he apologized and asked if he was in the wrong.
“No, no, thank you for telling me this, brother,” Tonowari pats his shoulder and sends him a strained smile, “I’m sorry but Ronal and I need to go now. I will make it up to you soon.”
She and he nods at him before they go to where you were before. You were not there anymore. Panic swells in her chest as the seconds go by she could not see you. She sees a common friend you and her shared and she quickly calls her over.
“Greetings, Ronal and Tonowari. Congratulations on your Iknimaya!” she beams at her.
“Greetings. I’m sorry but there is an urgent matter I need to attend to. Have you seen [Name]?” she hastily says and concern quickly washes over her friend’s face.
“Oh, I think she left early. Why, had something happened?”
“Thank you. There is just something we need to talk to her. I’ll see you soon.” She nods at her and calls for Ilus nearby. As they swim towards her and Tonowari, she cannot help but the questions that plague her mind. What if they were too late and you refuse to hear them out? What if you hate them for the betrayal you must have felt? What if—
“Ronal,” Tonowari grabs caresses her face with one hand and squeezes her hand with another. “Deep breaths. Breathe.”
She looks at him, frustration welling up in her eyes and she bites her lip. “[Name] sees you. She sees us.”
“What if she doesn’t anymore?” she asks the question that gives them immense pain to even think about. What if? What then?
Tonowar’s eyes soften and he tries to hide his flinch. He is silent and both of them could only cling desperately to the hope that you still do.
Oh, Eywa, she begs, Please help them see our innermost thoughts and the sincerity we have in our souls.
Please let them know of the wind and the ocean that calls out their name.
Please let them still see us.
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series-taglist: (tumblr won't let me tag some blogs so if you changed your username, please lmk!) @totesnothere04 @ducks118 @narutoboi @yeosxxx @fanboyluvr @ladylovegood-69 @northsoulss @thatfictionalwh0re @ghostlyworld @toodaloo432 @lovefromjazzy @greendino7 @neteyamforlife @vermilionzombie @vxncxntt @adaiasafira @tsuteysyawntu @mooniequeen @eywas-heir @arminsgfloll @dev1lm4n @myh3artttt @thehoneymushroomhealer @delightcandlelight @shadowmoonlight0604 @dae-dreamer @buttercup-beeee
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goldfades · 8 months ago
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had another jump then fall thought
after adam and cece start dating (and maybe move in together???) i could totally see paloma walking into their room at night holding her fave stuffie with tears in her poor little eyes saying she cant sleep (especially after the court thing) she would just be so scared that ceces gonna disappear or shes gonna get taken away from them again poor girl is so little with so much anxiety
oh my god YES. anxiety is very much a part of paloma’s life after the whole court hearing. she never wants to be away from adam ever again and even the mere thought gives the poor girl nightmares 🥹🥹
after the hearing, even adam gets anxious about the whole thing and the only person who’s able to calm him is sweet cece (despite her own fears of paloma’s bio mom taking her again)
─ warnings sosososo much anxiety, exhaustion but fluffy (post pining) moments with cece/adam. also this was written on my phone so there may be errors LOL
─ wc 635
the clock on the bedside table flashed 3:12 am and both cece and adam were fast asleep in their warm bed. cece had a 10 am lecture while adam had practice the next morning, they both wanted to catch up on their sleep.
the door creaked open, revealing a very pouty and tired looking paloma. she began crying softly and cece began to stir before waking up and seeing the toddler at the door, barely being able to stand.
“dove?” cece’s hoarse and tired voice rang out in the room as she got out of bed and grabbed the little girl into her arms.
at cece’s now empty spot on the bed, adam stirred and eventually woke and let out a sigh. this had been a constant struggle with paloma since the hearing but he couldn’t hold it against her, she didn’t even know what was going on. he would be lying if he said he wasn’t exhausted, though.
adam rubbed his eyes and sat up, running a hand through his tousled hair as he watched cece comfort paloma. he knew that the past few weeks had been tough on all of them, especially on paloma. ever since the hearing, she had been more clingy than usual, sensing the tension in the air.
"another bad dream?" adam asked, his voice still thick with sleep as he glanced over at cece and paloma.
cece nodded, her own exhaustion evident in the lines of her face. "yeah. they're getting more frequent, adam. i'm getting a little worried."
adam sighed as he stayed silent for a moment before speaking up. "she's fine. it's normal for her to wanna sleep with us, she's a baby."
"adam," cece's voice was a little agitated as adam once again tried to ignore paloma's obvious separation anxiety. she knew he couldn't help it though.
adam felt a pang of guilt at cece's tone. he knew she was right, but he also struggled with seeing paloma upset and he didn't know how he'd cope if he found out there was something wrong. he ran a hand through his hair again, feeling the weight of exhaustion settling on his shoulders.
"i know, cee," adam said softly, reaching out to gently stroke paloma's hair as she nestled against cece. "i just hate seeing her like this, you know? It breaks my heart. and it's my fault, too-"
"don't you dare say that, adam." cece's voice was firm, cutting off adam's self-blame before it could fully take root. she reached out to grasp Adam's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "it isn't anyone's fault except her mother's, for making us all endure the shit she gave us."
adam's shoulders sagged with relief at Cece's words, grateful for her understanding. he leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to paloma's forehead before resting his forehead against cece's.
"i know," Adam murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "i just... i want to do everything i can to protect her, you know? and when i see her like this... it's hard not to feel like i'm failing."
cece reached up, cupping Adam's cheek in her hand and guiding his gaze to meet hers. "you're not failing, adam. you're the best dad ever and paloma knows that. you can't control everything that happens no matter how hard you try, all you can do is just help her cope."
adam's eyes softened at her words, feeling a wave of gratitude wash over him. he leaned into her touch, savoring the warmth of her hand against his cheek.
"thank you, cece," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "i needed to hear that."
cece smiled softly, her eyes filled with warmth as she pressed a tender kiss to adam's lips. "of course, adam. we are in this together, remember? we'll figure it out."
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songbyrd-writes · 2 years ago
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Dating Konig headcanons
Trigger warnings: Small mention of reader's weight (not in a negative way)
A/N: I know a lot of people really like Konig (so do I) but I don't really like 'fanon' him so here's my take on our giant friend. These are also in typical headcanon format cause I'm too tired to split them up.
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- Konig is cocky and can talk some serious shit whenever he feels like he's done a better job than others, of course he'd never actually say these things to the person because I'm pretty sure his social anxiety wouldn't allow him to unless he was really pissed. (me too, man, me too.)
- He loves a challenge because he loves the feeling of overcoming it, it makes him feel much more confident in a similar way to how wearing the sniper hood all the time makes him comfortable doing things around lots of people. The knowledge that people will look at him but never truly see *him* is such a big confidence boost and that's an important thing for him.
- On the topic of the sniper hood, Konig’s social anxiety makes him value the feeling of privacy as well as anonymity that it gives him, going out without his hood makes him feel antsy and far too exposed for his liking.
- Oh sweet, sweet König... without his hood he's much more noticably anxious around you, he doesn't know where to look or what to say to not make it more awkward than it already is.
- LOVES absolutely loves when you actually kiss him on the lips or when you give him hugs, he loves the way you feel in his arms and because of how long he wears his hood he sometimes he forgets that he's taken it off until you give him a kiss.
- I'm sure none of us missed how tall he is and assuming Ghost is around 6'4 then Konig is around 6'5 to 6'7 (depending on your personal preference, I place him at 6'6 but if you want a reference for how tall he would look around others irl just look up Ben Graves bcos he was 6'5 :P)
- Honestly kind of forgets that like he's big as fuck, I could see him laying down on top of you and then not realizing that he's slowly crushing you ... he gets kind of embarrassed about it because he doesn't want to accidentally hurt you.
- Obviously the man can lift so there's no need to worry if you're plus size because he'll gladly pick you up and if you get embarrassed or insecure about it he'll be right there to make sure you know that he will never be bothered by how you look or how much you weigh. He fell in love with you not some arbitrary number. Same thing applies to anyone who weighs less, generally speaking your body doesn't matter to him as long as you're safe, comfortable, and happy!
- König doesn't try to leave hickeys or bruises but sometimes he can't help it, he'll try to make sure they can't be seen by others but in the heat of the moment he doesn't think too well 😅.
- If you're much smaller than him in height he'll absolutely swoon over you, he thinks you're so tiny and cute to him!!! I love whenever people have him call the reader Maus but i offer König calling you Hase (bunny) because its adorable.
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underoospeterparker · 1 year ago
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i have a request for our favorite night agent 😁 you said hurt/comfort SO! being on the run with peter and you’re pretty banged up (bruises, cuts, hairs a mess) and he helps you get undressed and showers with you and basically just takes care of u and bandages u up and feels rly guilty about you being hurt at all
warnings; a bit of nudity (not sexual!), brief descriptions of bruises + cuts, cleaning up wounds, light swearing
"shit, baby," peter whispers under his breath as you lean your weight against him, completely exhausted. he doesn't mind. "you sure you're okay?"
you nod, trying to comfort him instead of the opposite. "i'm okay, pete." you managed a small smile. "don't worry."
he sighs, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pressing a kiss to your neckline. "i'm always going to worry."
he gently urged you into the house, locking the door once you were safely inside. he sat you down on the sofa before untangling your body from his to grab you a cup of water.
you rested your head on the cushions, fingers mindlessly playing with themselves. you were drifting off already, body numb and aching from the fighting you'd endured. you closed your eyes and took deep breaths, trying to fight off your anxious thoughts.
your boyfriend returned, a frown on his face as you blinked your eyes open. he handed you a cup of water, but your hands were shaking so heavily that he held it up to your mouth himself.
"there we go, sweetheart," he murmured gently. you swallowed as he put the cup down on the coffee table. "do you wanna shower?"
you nodded eagerly. except for sleep, you wanted nothing more than to scrub off the long, tiring day that you'd had.
"can you wrap your arms around my neck?" he asked, and you complied without a word. "good girl. now just put your legs around my waist, okay?"
you did as he asked, and he picked you up like you weighed nothing, only the slightest grunt escaping from his mouth. he led you to your shared bathroom and asked, "do you want me to help you take off your clothes?"
"yes, please," you whispered.
his face softened at your vulnerability and he gave you a soft smile. "arms up, please." he pulled your top and bra over your head, and later your pants, all while your mind wandered.
"okay," he said, pulling you out of your thoughts. "come on, sweetheart, let's get you into the shower."
after a few minutes of scrubbing yourself clean, peter helped you out of the shower and into his arms and a fluffy towel. he wiped you down softly, careful of any bruises and wounds that you'd acquired while being on the run.
he helped you into a pair of fresh underwear and your pyjamas, then guided you back to the sink to brush your teeth.
he kept an arm around your waist as he sat you down on your shared bed and helped you relax against the pillows.
while he untangled himself from you, you clutched at his arm, not wanting to let go of him. he laughed softly and pressed a kiss to your forehead and crossed over to the other side of the bedroom to grab his medical kit.
your boyfriend then sat in front of you, cupping your face as he dabbed antiseptic on your cuts. you winced, grabbing ahold of his leg and squeezing. "it'll be over soon," he cooed. "don't worry, okay?"
he was right. he packed up rather quickly and pulled you both into the covers, and doing so, he pulled you into his arms.
you let out a small sigh, fully relaxing your body against his. "i love you," you whispered.
peter smiled into your hair, and murmured, "i love you too."
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furryprovocateur · 4 months ago
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saw my psych today. first time i've felt anxious about an appointment with her and it went as bad as i expected. nothing against her, truly. she's sweet and helpful and informative it's just i knew it'd worry and concern her to tell her about the acute heart failure. i mean. she's a medical professional. it'd be bad if she didn't worry. still it just sucks to put someone in that position, i fucking detest doing it. doesn't help that i felt like a buffoon when i tried to explain that i just have no energy lately to do anything. going to walmart to pick up my meds yesterday made me exhausted. what hope do i have of maintaining a regular exercise schedule again? still, it's a fucking desk job. it's not like i'm going anywhere and i spend most of my time dicking around. why does this job make me so fucking tired? why can't i just. . . be more active? i wish i understood what was fucking wrong with my fucking body. i've said it before and i'll say it again: i'll never know what's wrong with my body until they do an autopsy, and i'm not even important enough to get one. fuck. i'm just tired of worrying about my weight, i'm tired of having medical professionals look down their nose at me when i don't lose weight or i gain it back. maybe this just is my body! maybe this is always going to be my body. i made my peace with it. i know it's not healthy, i know it's not right. but it's my reality.
it's just hard to be stressed like this. i mean, i should be, my health is important and i'm eating like shit and knowingly not exercising. like, i wholly should be worried. it's just not productive to constantly be on edge about something and for most days to only be good when spent in absence of it. i don't think i'm unhappy and honestly my mood is good most days, but i have felt this constant anxiousness about my health. not to mention it's been added to the constant anxiety about money and what the fuck i'm gonna do for money long-term. pat's gonna die one day. it's already sick enough that i've exploited him by living with him into my thirties, into his retirement. the best thing on earth would've been if he never met my mother. he won't admit it, but we both know it's true. ugh. i just wish i had a full-time job that didn't kill my soul. i wish i could work one without my soul dying. i don't want to work just to live. i want to live my life without the hovering hammer of poverty. without all this fucking debt maybe i could make something of my shitty life! but who knows! i will always be in debt and in poverty and just generally trapped. i want to leave this state and country and i will never be able to! ugh ugh ugh.
whatever. i should probably delete this in like an hour
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braveclementine · 3 months ago
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Ghaida
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⚠️ TRIGGER WARNINGS OF SELF HARM!!!! ⚠️
Warnings: 18+readersonly, heavy angst, once again trigger warnings for self harm, self harm thoughts, cutting, excuses PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU WILL BE TRIGGERED
Copyright: I do not own any Marvel characters or locations. However, I do own my OCs, which consist of Penny Fury, Elizabeth Nelson, Elijah Chan, Katya Venice, Violetta Moscow, Lan Le, Josh, Trang Tien, Ahni Jallow, Mai Ito, and Ghaida Kashual as well as other OCs that will come up throughout the story.
😴🤙 Ŝ𝓉𝐎𝕣ч 🪒🌘
"I do not understand." Thor addressed the puny agent angrily. He normally tried to be kind to Phil, mostly because he felt bad for his and Lokis' past, but this was going to far. "I want to know where Ghaida is!"
"She doesn't want to be found." Coulson answered amicably. "I'm sorry Thor, if I could help I would."
"You can though." Thor was frustrated. He didn't understand why Ghaida left. Or well, he understood. But why hadn't she talked to him? Every single bit of this would've been avoided if Ghaida had just talked to him.
"You're victim blaming." Elizabeth dead panned next to him, where she was sitting on the desk in Coulson's office. She wouldn't tell him a damn thing either.
"I just want to make sure she's okay." Thor said, agitated. Not having Ghaida within his sights was making him anxious. Loki didn't even blame her! Why should the man of iron?
However, the man eventually sent Thor on his way, storming back to the tower with the ice princess skipping next to him like nothing was wrong.
"You know she's only gone for a little bit." Elizabeth said softly.
Thor was quiet. He missed her. He loved her. He wanted her.
Why had she left so quickly?
Why had she left a letter for the man of fire but not him?
Did she not love him the way he loved her?
"Of course she does." Elizabeth scoffed. "Why do you think she ran Thor? You're Loki's brother. The only person to be more mad at her for Lokis' almost death than his soulmates would be his family. She loved you to much to see if you wanted to kick her out like Ton-"
Elizabeth clammed up suddenly, but Thor's blood had already spiked.
"Shit." Elizabeth whispered. They pretty much raced to the community room. Her trying to keep him back, him with only one target in mind.
"Tony run!" Elizabeth yelped as the two of them slammed through the door.
Tony barely looked up until Thor had grabbed him out of his seat, slamming him against the wall.
"Ok buddy." Stark grunted while Loki got of his seat quickly, grabbing his shoulder.
"What are you doing?" Loki asked angrily.
"Thor, he didn't actually kick her out. Ghaida left before-"
"You were going to kick her out?" Thor rumbled. Steve put a hand on his other shoulder, squeezing firmly.
Stark flushed a dull red colour. "Heat of the moment. C'mon buddy, let me go."
"Thor." Steve said quietly, pulling on his shoulder a little bit. "I get it, tensions high, but you don't want to hurt him. Cool down."
Thor let go of the man of iron and looked around the room. The others looked uncertain and anxious.
"You had no right." Thor said angrily. "Maybe you don't love her, but I do. And you shouldn't have chased her away."
Elijah put a warm hand against Thor's shoulder. "Trang's attempting to find her. But Thor, I think maybe Ghaida really does need a break. Don't push it."
"I'm just worried." Thor snapped.
"Thor." Nat said softly, taking his hand and Thor softened just a little, letting her lead him away from the others to sit down on the couch. "I'm sure she is just fine."
👩‍💼🎩 ⓅⓄ𝕧 ℂĤΔᑎ𝕘ε 🌑🌒
Ghaida knew she shouldn't have. She had known it when she had methodically laid out the bandages and already damp washcloth. She knew it as she went ahead and took out the knife. And she had known it before she even put the knife to her wrists.
But it felt so relieving. She felt like with each cut, she was washing away a sin, a worry, lifting a weight off of her chest.
She felt free.
She let her wrists soak in warm water after she was done, before gently dabbing away the blood, wrapping each arm with the bandages, then went for food and drink, knowing exactly how to replenish herself.
She sat herself down on the couch, knowing this was the best place to be on the off chance she passed out.
Only after the cleansing did she let herself cry. Just sob really. Loud and ugly until she got a headache.
When she was done, she got up and drank more water. She moved about the apartment like a ghost.
"Are they okay?" She asked aloud with sigh.
'Thor is very upset with your leaving' Viden answered. 'He is trying to find you. So are the others.'
"Elizabeth still isn't giving anything away?" Ghaida asked.
'No.'
She didn't ask anymore questions but like always now, Viden interjected his own opinion, 'I do not believe you should be cutting your wrists. This practice is very unsafe and it took you a long time to overcome it last time that you fell off.'
She pushed the voice to the back of her head, cutting it off. She knew she wasn't supposed to. She knew what had happened the last time. Slice, sip, swallow, then waking up in a hospital room after having her heart stop.
It would be different this time. No pills. No alcohol. Just clean, safe cuts.
🌓🎂 Ⓣⓘм乇 ⓢ𝓚ⓘρ ⚜️🏄‍♀️
A few weeks later, Ghaida struggled as she started to wake up, blinking her eyes open, realizing that she wasn't alone. She also knew she was no longer laying on the couch in the small room in her apartment. But she was struggling to come around.
When she finally managed to find some sort of clarity, she saw that she was in Tony's arms and in the bedroom that she only used at night.
He was staring at the wall, seemingly lost in thought. "T-Tony?" Ghaida wondered if she was dreaming.
Tony looked down at her. He looked lost, confused, hurt. Ghaida immediately tensed, wondering if this was another nightmare she was having. The ones where he would start speaking softly, blaming her for Loki's death. Blood would pour from his eyes and he would die too.
"I'm sorry." He said instead. His hands slid down her arms and brought them up to his face. "This is my fault."
Ghaida realized that her bandages had been changed, faint red against the white fabric. Suddenly realizing what was going on, she attempted to shoot out of his arms, but he held tight around her middle, not letting her.
"I should have realized." Tony said softly against the shell of her ear.
"No." Ghaida shook her head violently, suddenly feeling embarrassed. She didn't know how he'd found her. She hadn't planned on any of them knowing she'd relapsed. She had planned when she was going back and was going to let her arms heal up before then. Not a soul would know.
But here was Tony, having changed her bandages and apologizing.
"Shhh." Tony whispered softly, kissing the side of her head. "I was never going to kick you out. I was scared. I was scared I was going to lose Loki, but I didn't. I lashed out, wanting to hurt you. I wanted to hurt anyone at that moment, make them feel my pain. But that was unfair. You were terrified and scared. Your family was in danger and you were trying to keep us out of it. None of it was your fault Ghaida. None of it was anyones fault but HYDRAs."
Tony cupped her face, "But you can't keep doing this Ghaida. I can't let you hurt yourself like this."
"Tony I'm fine, really." Ghaida said, heart pounding. "I just needed a cleansin-"
"Do you know how long I've been here?" Tony interjected angrily. "Nine hours, Ghaida. You are not okay! Worried out of my mind, having F.R.I.D.A.Y. read your body so that I could make a decision of whether or not to take you to a hospital! And if you want a cleansing, then you fucking meditate! Don't ever do this shit again!"
Ghaida sighed. "Alright, point made. Are you going back to the tower now?"
Tony's arms tightened around her. "Do you know what Elizabeth said after you left?"
"I'm sure she used that wonderful flaw of hers where she thinks all of her friends have no faults and defended me even though she shouldn't have been." Ghaida sighed.
"She asked us what we would have done if your positions had been reversed." Tony answered himself. "And Bucky said he would have punished her."
Ghaida snorted. "Going to punish me Stark?"
Tony ignored her once more, "but you know what? I wouldn't have. I realized something. The anger I felt at you, I would've felt at her. There is no difference. I would've felt it at Trang too. Because it wasn't anger. Not really. It was fear. I was terrified for you, too. Terrified I was going to lose you too, that we were going to lose you too."
Tony shifted a little. "And it would've been because of me, you know? I was the one F.R.I.D.A.Y. was trying to reach out for, to stop you from leaving the tower in the first place. But I was ignoring her, letting Bucky and Steve take care of me. Ignoring you. So in the end, it's my fault. Because I wasn't there for you, because I failed you."
Ghaida sighed, sitting up now, out of Tony's reach just slightly. "Okay." She paused and then sighed, "You can tell Trang that you tried and whatever she promised you, you can get but I'm staying here."
She moved to get off the bed and Tony was blocking her path, his eyes smoldering now. Ghaida didn't actually know if he meant it. Viden was staying silent and she wasn't asking questions. Part of her didn't want to know the truth or the lie. That Viden was going to say it was Trang or it was Thor or someone else trying to convince Tony to let her back into the tower. She didn't want to know it.
She also wanted confirmation that Tony was honest. That Tony did want her back of his own volition.
"You're not listening." Tony growled, caging her in on the bed. "This isn't about what Trang wants or Thor or Elijah or Elizabeth or Loki or any of them. This is between me, and you. How I feel about you, and how you feel about me. I get it. I haven't been around much-"
"Because you have Trang!" Ghaida finished, exasperated. "And I've been with Thor. I don't need you around Tony. I don't need anyone at all! I can be fine just on my own here-"
"And what if next time I come back and you're dead?" Tony had finally reached the end of his tether. He had snapped. Quivering with anger, rage boiling in his eyes along with tears. His hands gripped tightly around her hips and she finally let Viden in.
True, honesty. Tony loved her. Tony hated himself for what he watched and witnessed. Her bloody wrists and unconscious form.
"What if next time I come back you've gone to far?" Tony whispered. "And I have to go back and tell them you're dead. After they've already lost so much. You have kids, Ghaida. Twins. I know I'm guilt tripping you, but I will do and say whatever I can to keep you alive. But the one thing I will not lie about are my feelings towards you Ghaida, because I no longer play with feelings. I love you. And you either believe that or you don't, it doesn't matter. You're leaving this place. I'm taking you home."
And Ghaida submitted, leaning into him, "Okay. Take me home."
🍮🌔 𝓣𝐈ΜE 𝓈Ҝเ卩 🤤🫵
Ghaida felt nervous re-entering the tower. Tony could sense it apparently as he pulled her closer in his arms. He hadn't stopped touching her since leaving her apartment. It was as though he was afraid that she would vanish into smoke if he didn't.
He also seemed upset with her for not taking the wrist cutting more seriously. But she had known what she was doing. It had been very carefully planned out. She knew it wouldn't have killed her. It was, well as she had said, cleansing.
She knew it was reasonable on his end. If she found out that Elizabeth or Elijah or Wanda was doing the same thing she would be livid. But she also had all the measurements. How deep to cut, where to avoid cutting, how many lines to cut. It was simple, easy.
Cleansing.
She kept coming back to that word.
Her excuse.
Every single time.
Elijah's face was the first that she saw as the two of them entered into the community room. He was in front of her in seconds, pulling her into his arms. He didn't act as though she had been missing or anything. He simply kissed her and said, "Welcome back-"
His greeting died in his throat as he felt along her arm and found the bandages. Ghaida quickly adverted her eyes from his, as though looking for the next person to greet.
"Ghaida." Elijah whispered quietly.
She ignored him, moving out his grasp to hug Trang who was very enthusiastic about her being there, obviously.
Slender arms wrapped around her from behind suddenly and she gasped a little, being taken aback. She looked over her shoulder to see that Loki was standing there and his lips pressed against her cheek.
"I'm sorry." She immediately choked out. "I'm so-"
Loki kissed her lips, silencing her, pulling her over to the armchair. He looked better than the last time she had seen him.
Elijah was hovering in the background, looking anxious, arms crossed over his chest. Ghaida knew that he was going to force a conversation between the two of them later.
Loki's hand trailed on the bandages and then he slowly unwrapped them. "Loki wait." Ghaida whispered frantically, looking around quickly but only Tony and Elijah were really paying them any attention now. The others were clearly giving an illusion or reality of privacy.
But Loki let the bandages burn away, turning into green dust particles. He lifted her mutilated wrists to his mouth, kissing her and she watched his magic seal away and heal her. "It was never your fault, I never blamed you." Loki whispered. "You are loved Ghaida. You need never do this again, it will only hurt you in the future. You know that."
She did.
But right now, with everyone telling her so, she didn't care.
Loki sighed, "You don't care now, but you will." Loki forced her to look at him, gently tilting her chin up. "I'm not berating you. I understand, but I just wish you would talk to us. Even if it's my oaf of a brother."
Ghaida finally laughed a little at that and Loki smiled. "Now, we leave that in the past until you're ready to really talk about it. What do you want to do?"
"Ghaida." Elijah said again and Ghaida looked at him. He looked sad now instead of upset and she sighed.
"Elijah." She murmured.
Elijah knelt in front of her, taking her hands in his, ignoring Loki who he seemed to have a problem with right now. "I love you." Was all he said, kissing her hands. He rested his head on her knees and she ran a hand through his fluffy black hair.
"I love you too." She sighed and then let the tears fall. "I'm sorry Elijah. I- I wanted to relapse. I just used it as an excuse. I wanted to feel it again."
She fell to the floor with him, letting him hold her. "I'm sorry! I don't want to do it anymore. I don't! I want to stop."
"Okay." Elijah whispered. "Yes Ghaida. I'll help you. Good girl." He kissed the side of her head and now- now she felt it.
She felt cleansed. 
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holyshit · 2 years ago
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I don't want to be that kind of person and I'm all for meme-ing through the pain usually but I don't find this even remotely funny. First of all it just reminds me of when he actually got arrested and what a shitty situation that was and secondly it's a shit situation this time too, thousands of fans are sad and anxious and jail jokes are just not funny when we don't know the actual reason for cancelling yet.
the thing is, jail is not even remotely a realistic possibility of why he cancelled. so it's not like people are joking about a situation that can potentially be what is actually happening, and i think if anything, joking about it can show people who are worried about jail being a possibility that it's wildly unlikely. it being hushed down and not talked about/joked about might give more weight to the people who tend to get anxious thinking it's an actual real possibility if they don't know how these things work. he does not have any existing current legal problems that would cause him to be locked up in a "being sentenced to prison" sense, and if there was for some reason a recent situation that got him arrested and put in jail, 1) he would most definitely not be in jail currently as he would have the money and resources to be bailed out, 2) he was seen recently and his family are acting normal, and 3) we would probably know already since legal things with adult celebrities are rarely able to be kept secret for long.
i understand not wanting to joke about jail/prison in a general sense if it's a topic that makes you anxious since it's a systemic problem that affects a lot of people and families, but i don't personally think it should be encouraged at all that jail is a possibility for why he cancelled. i have no interest in feeding the idea that it is a potential reality enough that people joking about it might be joking about a real scenario (which it isn't), so i would rather it be clear that it is unlikely so that people who are spiraling into worst case scenarios realize that it is not a realistic possibility.
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scienter · 2 years ago
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Just read the second part of Kaladin's first chapter from Stormlight 5. Oh boy. It has me worried.
"Everything you've done, Kal, everything you've been, has prepared you for this. It's going to be hard. Fortunately, life has been hard, so you're working under familiar constraints. We just carry these weights, son; eventually, we'll get to put them down."
Kaladin glanced to the side to where Wit was staring off into space, idly spinning the red flute in his fingers. Something in his voice, his face. "You're talking," Kaladin said softly, "like you think one of us won't survive this."
"I wish I were optimistic enough to think one of us would survive."
Oh no. Wax got a similar lecture from Sazed in The Lost Metal, and we all know how that turned out. We're getting character deaths for sure in this book.
"Just trying to give you a proper send-off," Wit replied. "We're at the end, Kaladin, and you are needed. I want to send you to your divine destiny with a spring in your step."
Divine destiny?? That could mean a number of things. *groans* I think that Kaladin either dies in this book or he becomes a Herald. Please turn into a Herald. Kaladin is my favorite Stormlight character. I don't want him to die halfway through the series! ARGH!
"Because," Wit said, "you haven't finished inventing it yet!" He leaned in. "About time someone figured out a method to counteract what I've been doing. Makes my job more fun, because a challenge is always appreciated. Now go, the two of you. The world needs you: more than you, or it, or anyone other than your humble Wit yet realizes. The fight ahead of you is going to be legendary. Just remember what I said. You can't fight this one with the strength of muscle. You'll have to wield the spear another way."
Seriously. Kaladin is either going out in a blaze of glory or doing something big like ascending. Maybe this is a reference to Kaladin swearing the 5th Ideal??
Kaladin frowned again. "I'm never going to see you again, am I, Wit?"
"Nobody knows the future, Kal," he replied, "not even me. So instead of saying goodbye, let's call this an extended period of necessary separation, requisite to give me time to think of the most perfect, exquisite insult. And if I never get to deliver it to you in person; well, kindly do me the favor of imagining how wonderful it was, all right?"
Oh shit. A goodbye. That's never reassuring. I'm going to be anxious about his book until it's published.
There is so much foreshadowing in this conversation. The question is what is it foreshadowing? Kaladin's death or his ascension? I don't know!
Please don't kill Kaladin. Please don't kill Kaladin. Please don't kill Kaladin.
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