#and this also goes for Gollum btw

[blubushie]

waa the smell of peaches is one of my absolute favourite smells, nice to see them get some love :DD

also care to share one of those peach stories you've got?~

Ok this is gonna be long and it's copy pasted from Blucord messages. So it's under a cut.

When I was on the Akuna we docked briefly in Cairns for supplies and Bill brought back tinned peaches and I stole a tin and climbed the crow's nest so nobody could steal my fucking peaches.

Picture this little wet-haired rat of a Blu worming his way through a gathered crowd of men until he spots a tin of peaches and immediately crouching between someone's legs to grab it off the pile before zipping out.

"[LEGAL] YOU CUR YOU BRING THAT BACK YOU SON OF A WHORE!"

"FUCK YOU FAT MAN!"

I scrambled up the mast like a rat.

What you DIDN'T hear was me giggling to myself about my newfound peaches. I sounded like fucking Gollum. Peacheses!

(I do a pretty good Gollum impression too btw.)

I was ducking and covering from fucking oyster shells being chucked at me. Good kind too, no pull tab, so I had to open it with my FRED but the tin was big enough that I could fish the peaches out with my fingertips so I just did that. Keep in mind all I had for food the past few weeks was whatever gruel Bill cooked up so I was fucking goblinmode for those peaches. I hadn't had anything sweet in weeks. I NEEDED that shit. Was absolutely 100% prepared to kill someone over a single slice.

Oh also on that note. That day was the only day a man has ever kissed me before [name of some bloke I met at an airport and had a one-night-stand with].

I drank all the juice. Because I love the juice. I go below decks and Wally (my closest mate at the time) is down there. So I walk into the mess and Wally's standing off to the side so I don't see him at first. I walk in and I'm asking Bill if he got any more peaches because I was willing to help him make a cobbler when Wally grabs me by my (still wet) hair, pulls me into a kiss, then pushes me away and goes "He still tastes like them" before walking out while I'm left awestruck.

Which then left me going "Wh—wh... awuh... wh... hhh...? HEY!" and chasing Wally out while Bill laughed. And Ernie had to break us up cuz I was gonna fight him about it.

Blu: YOU KISSED ME!

Wally: Nah didn't.

Blu: YEAH YA DID!

Wally: Nah didn't!

Blu: YOU FUCKEN KISSED ME!

Wally: Nah didn't, kissed a peach.

Blu: Awuh... [Blu Screen of Death] ...YOU CALLING ME A FRUIT?

Wally: Yeah. [said with the most shit eating grin]

And then I smacked him.

I still ended the night curled up in his hammock though so it's whatever.

Wally: What're you doing out here?

Blu: POUTIN' ABOUT MY PEACHES.

Wally: You ate whole tin...

Blu: YA STOLE THE REST.

Wally: Right. C'mon, come inside.

Blu, grumpily: Don't want to.

Wally: [Legal]. C'mon. Comin' into winter, we'll be in deepwater within the hour and Ernie's gonna skirt a storm, come inside.

[20 minutes later]

Wally: Stop fuckin' squirmin'.

Blu: YOU'RE NOT COMFY.

Wally: [Grumble grumble]

Blu: 'M gonna elbow ya in the fucken ribs....

Wally: Better not.

Blu, sleepily: 'M gonna, fuck you...

[ach-sss-no]

Screenshot/Text Let's Play of Lotr(TM) Gollum(TM) Begins Now

...sort of!

Here is my initial post, which is a table of contents/intro that goes through all the collection items and talks about some of the game performance and settings.

Click Here For Post (you do Not need a dreamwidth account to view it)

please:

let me know if reading the LP on Dreamwidth works for you. be honest. it's not too late for me to go to another platform, such as using Tumblr pages. thats why i'm doing a pre-post like this. I can also change the blog theme and mess with the presentation of the text. I realize the rock theme may not be worth the vibes if it makes the text look funky. (Please do NOT bring my attention to the weird shifts in fonts, I am aware of what caused the problem & it won't happen again! but it would be a massive pain to fix it in this post, so I am going to leave it for now...)

pick a day of the week that you'd like to see the actual let's play updates be posted on: https://strawpoll.com/40ZmqxVwlZa i tried embedding a tumblr poll it did not work and i dont like them anyway. Friday is not an option because I have another project that's already updating on Fridays (over on @cassiesart ) and tbh it's more important to me than this let's play.

had some weird issues getting all the images to post, btw

[birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo]

I DID IT!!!! I FINALLY FECKING DID IT!!!!! I REWATCHED THE ENTIRE LOTR TRILOGY!!! and do i EVER have some tHOUHGTS hdosidhsaodi below the cut ✨✨✨

FIRST THINGS FIRST:

was it as good as i remembered??

short answer: yes!!!!!! long answer: oh my gfucijing go d soj shjues us god mother of shitw yEes yes yseeeessss 😭😭😭 (baby birb had better taste than present birb but don't tell anyone i said so 👀)

there are loads of things i missed before, as well as things i didn't understand, but i understand them now :'D it always gave me that wriggly weird feeling in my chest even as a kid, just like 'lilo & stitch' or the song 'reflection' from mulan, but i didn't know WHY. turns out, these things touched my heart and it scared me, bc emotions have always scared me. but ive learnt to appreciate them as well. not all tears are an evil. i know what gandalf meant now :'D

does it hold up????

in my opinion, it does!!!! some of the cgi may look a bit wonky to modern eyes, but for the most part it's totally fine, if not better looking than some more.....recent films 👀 i've never been a great fan of slow-motion, but it's used mostly effectively here, to enhance the drama as opposed to taking up space (sure the feckers are long enough without it anyway 🤣) the core message of the film is beautiful and timeless. there is hope and goodness and love in our world, and it's worth every ounce of courage in our hearts!! it's as true today as it was when the film was made!! as true as it was when jrr tolkien wrote his stories!! if i believe in anything at all (much as i often profess i don't) it's only that our world is worth fighting for.

are u still after shipping aragorn and legolas??

YEAH. IM BASIC SO WHAT??? i JUST LIKE IT OK. I JUST. LIKE IT ;A;

will u be making more bad jokes now??

OF COURSE I WILL!! do u even KNOW me it's like u don't even KNOW me wtf. there's just a lot this time so. OK HERE GOES 💪😤

i can't believe smeagol was always just. like that lol. baby birb did not realise it was the same character as gollum btw. baby birb was. silly 👀

THE CAIN INSTINCT PREVAILS ONCE MORE!!!

'wake up, sleepies' is how i greet my cats in the morning btw

lol merry and pippin look high as FECK. baby birb didn't understand that lmao, i thought they were just tired 🤣

well, at least the gang are back together!! (mostly ;A;) merry & pippin dancing on tables, eowyn bringing aragorn a drink....good for them :'D

also!! nice pyjamas, lads!!! they all look so cute omg ;A;

THE ORB!!!! that's great, we here on tumblr love orbs, this is-----oh shit is he dead?? *SHOVES MERRY*

omg when aragorn grabs the orb and falls over and then legolas grabbed him 👀👀👀 I JUST WANT THEM TO KISS OK

the third act break up btwn merry and pippin is so sad 😔

aaAAH!! A CHILD!!!!! D: scary!! ;A;

every time elrond says 'there's nothing for u here' i keep hearing 'this is a DECENT town and a LOCAL shop!! there's nothing for U here!!!' lmao 🤣

the king's hall at minas tirith could use a few throw rugs or sth tbh, maybe a couple paintings. bit sparse in there really :P

right i'll just say it: the witch-king's fell beast's head looks like a di--

YAAAS PIPPIN LET'S DO SOME ARSON!! :D

aragorn's arm-flail run is back and it sparks so much joy i love him i love him i love hi

i've counted THREE (3) BLATANT WILHELM SCREAMS across these films!!! one in ttt, and TWO in rotk!!! incredible

i can't believe denethor says 'yeah i wish u died instead of ur brother. rip i guess' 😐 TO HIS FUCKING FACE!!! evil. faramir's gonna remember that FOREVER. u got to be careful what u say to ur kids bc even if they don't bring it up again, they will never ever forget. my dad called me 'useless' once when i was 15 and i still think about it sometimes. DO NOT SAY WEIRD SHIT TO UR KIDS. IM BEGGING U ;A;

despite denethor's A+ parenting, faramir is a nice guy, totally willing to lead his men on a death march to a fight they can't possibly win, throwing away their lives (and their horses) on an impossible task for the futile hope of making his father love him. rip 😔

NICE SINGING PIP!!! reminds me of irish sean-nós singing, traditional music from ireland ;A; (here's an example :D)

ngl watching denethor eat is like watching the Dinner Scene from texas chainsaw 1974 👀

OH LOOK DAD'S HERE!! hi dad!! thanks for not giving us any facial expression as a hint to what dad wanted, theoden, ur so. helpful ._.

'hey so listen ur gf is dying and since she's my daughter that means i have to make sure U don't die so. here.' *SWORDGASM*

actually that sword was baby birb's fav bits. baby birb LOVED swords ;A;

THE WORST BIT. eowyn tries to confess her feelings and aragorn rejecting her is SO PAINFUL AND AWKWARD AAA ;A;

BEEG DRUMMERS IN THE ORC ARMY!!!! and SIEGE MACHINES!!

legolas squinting at the ghost like 'this guy SUS'

aragorn's 'u WILL suffer me 😠'

it never occurred to me when i was a kid, but the gang are doing a bit of fucking. NECROMANCY here aren't they??? like???

wait who tf is iorlas

OH is it that hot blond??? NICE. i like him >:3c

being a wizard is cool bc u can cast spells OR if ur gandalf u can use the staff to wHACK DENETHOR OVER THE HEAD!!!! he's got a shillelagh and i'm glad of it 😌 (baby birb used to listen to da's political music and one of the songs had a line about being 'whacked with a sprig of shillelagh' which i got a kick out of 🤣)

'we should TAKE the broken city pieces and THROW IT AT THE ORCS!!!' :D (read it like the spongebob meme pls)

'GROND! GROND! GROND!' ('grond' refers to the biggest door-knocker EVER)

gollum u need to stop fat-shaming sam, ur being #problematic and they're gonna cancel u 😩

'CRUMBS ON ITS JACKETSES' lol silly that's a CLOAK!!

OH FECK FRODO'S ALLERGIC TO SPIDER BITES!! ;A;

it might actually be easier to carry him in that cocoon

'don't go where i can't follow' FUCKING KILL ME 😭

[women screaming]

i still don't know what an eored is. or WHY i don't know. why

denethor re-enacts 'flashdance' lol (except he intends to burn himself and his son alive)

OH SHIT THE MAD MAX COSPLAYERS ARE HERE

oh no!! uncle's horse!!! (oh and uncle, oh no!)

HERE IT IS. THE LINE WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR. I AM NO MAN!!! rip uncle tho lol.

can't believe he really pulled the 'u should smile more, ur so pretty when u smile' rubbish before 😒

WOW we should have hired ghosts AGES ago, they can go thru walls and everything!!! O_O

MERRY AND PIPPIN ARE BACK TOGETHER!!! yay~

sam is SUCH a badass, look at him go!! 'AND THAT'S FOR MY OLD GAFFER!!!' adding to his kill count with tears in his eyes :'D

sauron moving his beam around like 'EYE SEE U!! EYE AM LOOKING UPON U!!!'

aw feck frodo's doing the jesus thing where he falls down a few times but has to get back up ;A;

'a day may come when i stop memeing on this line....BUT IT IS NOT THIS DAY!!!!!'

lol they're bullying gollum, u love to see it 🤣

SAM STOP BEING PERFECT FOR FIVE SECONDS CHALLENGE LEVEL: IMPOSSIBLE

DO IT KING!! TOSS THAT SHIT!!!!

'what are u waiting for?!' 'i've got to give it a chance to defeat me, it's only sportsmanlike, sam!!!'

LEGOLAS'S FACE. WHEN ARAGORN FALLS DOWN. u can see his mouth go like 'ARAGORN' but it's slow-mo and silent ;A; he just starts shoving ppl out his way to get to him hdoasdiasadisj im. gay

AND THEN THE VOLCANO. and pippin sobbing 'FRODO!!!!' ;A;

god all this lava and frodo and sam haven't got any shoes smh

'uhgh i had an awful dream where my finger got chomped off by this freakish little----OH HAI GANDALF!!!!'

his friends are so happy to see him, they are all so happy omg ;A; THE SHIRE THEME STARTS PLAYING WHEN SAM ;A;

tbh sam and frodo could have made out at ANY point and it would have been less gay than. whatever tf had been going on btwn them the entire trilogy 👀

aragorn singing all elfy adn handsome an di love him i love him i lo

legolas all done up as well, they do a mutual shoulder clasp and he's all demure they look like a fecking WEDDING ok they are getting married ;A;

lol arwen looking out from behind the banner like 'PEEK A BOO!!' always sends me 🤣

(another thing that always sends me: legolas and gimli keeping track of their kill count lmao 🤣)

AND THEN ARAGORN DOES A BIG SMOOCH ON HER IN FRONT OF EVERYONE??? INCLUDING HER DAD????? 😳

'my friends, u bow to no one' SIR UR FRIENDS ARE TERRIFIED (except pippin, he's ok with attention 😌)

THE LADS GO HOME!! SAM GETS THE GIRL!!! THERE'S A WEDDING!!! then the sad bit ._.

side note: galadriel is low-key terrifying and i love her for it. she is such a FREAK, idek how to explain it or why i think so but i just. do 👀 she talks and there's a reverb on her voice, she smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes!!!!! SCARY 👀

'not all tears are an evil' fuck u gandalf stop stabbing me in the heart over and over, ur bullying me ;A;

WOW NICE JOB NOT PREPARING UR FRIENDS FOR UR DEPARTURE AT ALL FRODO!!!! jfc u could have at least TOLD THEM, this is FAR more traumatic and shocking!!! >:V

awww he and gandalf hold hands tho omg 🥺

THEY'RE ALL CRYING AND IM CRYING AND IM UPSET AND BABY BIRB LEFT THE ROOM ALREADY ;A;

and then they SAILED OFF INTO THE SUNSET!! for some reason. (oh right!! great war allegory 😔)

TINY BABBY HOBBITS!!!

THE END!!

[anghraine]

I don’t know exactly how I’d write it, but someday, I’d really like to write fic that explores the Númenórean “powers of mind” with Faramir or Denethor or Aragorn or someone that treats their mental powers less as clearly-defined abilities and more as a way of experiencing and interacting with the world that is just kind of ... off and weird. But not for them!

Maybe it’s because I’m first and foremost a Faramir stan and he in particular is—intense, yes, but also peculiarly casual about it. He just goes around talking about how, like, Gollum’s mind is full of locked doors and closed windows and dark rooms but Faramir can see that he’s concealing information about Cirith Ungol and has committed murder before. He’s got this total assurance about a) what he picks up and b) that other people, even two hobbits he barely knows, will just accept “I read it in him” and “that much I perceived clearly in his mind” as sufficient explanations.

And I don’t think Faramir is trying to make Gollum suffer for lying, but he can take it in stride as a thing that happens around him. Right, he doesn’t tell lies and other people can’t lie to him without pain. Sure. He forbids killing animals unless it’s strictly necessary and beasts obey his will. Okay.

What I mean, I guess, is that he has this remarkable matter-of-factness about it all that seems to come, or at least perhaps comes, from not really differentiating much between the mundane and mystical sides of himself. Everything flows together (this fits quite well btw with how Tolkien described the similar abilities of some Elves, though Faramir himself is somewhat wary towards Elves, and at any rate, this stuff would always have been present in his life via Denethor’s shared abilities).

And so I think it would be interesting if he’s so matter-of-fact about this stuff because that’s how he and people like him experience it—as pervasively interwoven into their lives and being, rather than discrete abilities.

[tuuliii]

The Lord of the Rings, Turku 2018 Part1

Watching the musical stream yesterday got me very sentimental about this play the Turku City Theatre did back in 2018. I saw it three times and it ran from February till December with a two month summer break. Opening night was February 15th on the big stage of the theatre.

The running time of the show was about four hours, with two 20 minute intermissions. It was LONG, but honestly, the time went by so fast you really couldn't tell it was that long.

I've consumed all the media I have been able to find about this thing so let me tell you a little about the production.

Director Mikko Kouki had had a dream about doing LOTR for years so when they decided to apply for the rights, they had no expectations of actually getting them. Then, Tolkien Estate answered "Yeah sure go ahead" and they started planning big time. Apparently they also got the rights for the Hobbit, but the upcoming production has been very secretive so far. They've only shared a couple of Easter eggs on their social media.

The set was huge. Like, the width of the stage is not that great, but it has a lot of depth, so they were able to make awesome things with it. The Black Gates and the Ents for example. I visited the back stage once, and the amount of stuff that was in storage there was mind-blowing. The cast also wasn't that large in number, so pretty much everyone but the main characters had multiple roles. Mainly playing orcs and minor characters.

Here's the cast:

(Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Gandalf, Aragorn, Gollum, Boromir/Mouth of Sauron, Gimli/Underhill1, Legolas/Tom Bombadil, Bilbo/Gorbat/Haldir/Gatekeeper, Arwen/Goldberry, Galadriel/Vhispering voice, Saruman, Éowyn/Rosie Cotton/Underhill2, Isildur/Shagrat/The voice of the Black Rider, Wormtongue/Barlyman Butterbur/Elrond, The Witch King, The Black Riders, The voice of Treebeard, The voice of Sauron, Elves/Ents/Orcs)

Let me just fangirl about Sam for a second. He was ultimately my favorite hobbit. Hannes Suominen did an amazing job and was perfectly suited for the role. The other hobbits were very good as well. Frodo was adorable and I really liked how they casted the hobbits according to their ages in the books.

Lets start from the beginning now.

The play began with a quick prologue about the history of the ring, how Bilbo found it and of the Last Alliance. The fishing scene with Smeagol and Deagol was also in the prologue. Then we move on to the Shire.

This is Bag End. Bilbo's party was mostly cut, but he leaves and gives the Ring to Frodo. Meanwhile Merry and Pippin spot a black rider and run to Bag End to tell their friends about it.

Gandalf arrives and snatches Sam through the window and sends Frodo on his way. This was very quick, but understandably so. It got the job done and Merry and Pippin were hilarious. (In the actual production, a picture of Tolkien was hanging on the wall of Bag End btw)

Next, they are being chased by a Black Rider and decide to take the shortcut through the Old Forest. The riders looked amazing. They were puppets with a rider standing in the middle on stilts.

This production had TOM BOMBADIL! I really loved that, cause he's usually the first one to get cut, or like in the musical he only got a name drop in the end.

Here he is saving the Hobbits from Old Man Willow. And yeah, there were A LOT of pyrotechnics involved.

I think this scene with Gandalf and Saruman was next. I really loved Saruman, and Gandalf got slammed onto the wall. It was cool. (sorry about the quality)

Then there's Bree and the Prancing Pony, which rose from the firkin floor. I got such bad chills every time. This was the only pic I could find, but this was an amazing scene with lively folk music and lots of drunken people, that kept harassing Frodo. Aragorn ominously smoked his pipe in the corner, till Frodo put the ring on.

Here, the Hobbits are trying to decide weather to trust the Strider or not. (From left to right: Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Sam)

Then, Frodo is stabbed at Weathertop and Strider sets a couple of Black Riders on fire. Like...he actually set their clothes on fire...

Anyway, they reach Bruinen with the help of Arwen, who conveniently replaces Glorfindel again. The black riders get swept away and Frodo is rescued. Also the elves of Rivendell had colorful hair and I'm all in for that:D

Then becomes this sus scene with Aragorn and Arwen. Aragorn is in love with her (obviously), but this Arwen is a little reluctant to give away her immortality and marry him. Aragorn proposes to her and she literally says "No❤️". Aragorn is heartbroken for a second but then we move on to the council of Elrond.

Here's the Fellowship. Arwen and Elrond on the back with Bilbo.

This is where act 1 ended.

Act 2 starts in the snow storm in the mountains and the Fellowship decides to go through Moria. Here are the gates. Very bad picture, but that was the only one I could find.

Moria goes pretty much according to book. Pippin does dumb shit and the orcs are woken. Their cave troll looked like a literal Michelin man, but the Balrog made up for that. Pity there aren't any pictures of it, but it was super cool. There was fire everywhere and the puppet looked really scary. I petted it, when I visited the back stage; from close up, it was very cute.

Apparently only 10 pics are allowed per post so part two and maybe three are needed. Part 2 starts with Lothlórien.

[senadimell]

Boromir for the character ask?

send me a character and i’ll list:

favorite thing about them: Honestly? His focus. He's a problem-solver. He focuses on whatever task is in front of him, and while he's the golden child, I honestly don't know if he'd be the best fit for Steward because he seems to be at his best when he's thinking about concrete solutions to discrete problems.

Oh! The other thing is that he evaluates the advice given to him for what it is, not based on the authority of the advisor. He’s not going to accept bad advice just because it comes from a trustworthy source, and he’s going to be honest about his thoughts. So he’ll trust and respect the advice of the council of Elrond, but not to the point where he doesn’t ask questions or question things that don’t make sense (I’m thinking about Caradhras here) It’s a good skill to have as the de-facto heir to Gondor, and it makes sense that he’s not in awe of elves or Gandalf and acts among them as a guest but also as an equal at least in political status, though his experience is vastly more limited.

At the same time, he’s not arrogant or haughty. He's a team player. He’s supportive of decisions for the most part, though where the ring is concerned, things get skewy. He’s not the kind of person to rub mistakes back in your face. He’s compassionate and understanding (which we see even in the way he treats Frodo as he strives for the Ring).

least favorite thing about them: Honestly Boromir doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I suppose his positive traits are also double-edged swords. Focusing more on the advice than the giver sort of has Feanor vibes? And you can see where his focus leads him when he talks to Frodo about why he wants the ring and how he would use it. He can see his corner of the world (Gondor) and his place in saving it (political, but primarily military leadership), and it’s his practicality, drive, and focus that the Ring exploits. He’s too busy thinking about what he must do to save the day that he misses the grander scheme (yet he’s doing it because he cares! he cares!).

brOTP: Um, Faramir, I guess. Though I guess it’d be kinda sweet if he’s got a brotherly relationship with Bergil. I can easily imagine Bergil hero-worshipping Boromir, and so I think it’d be sweet if Boromir did acknowledge him and know him by name.

OTP: none? look, I rarely ship and even more rarely out of canon.

nOTP: also none? Shelob? The Ring?

random headcanon: I dunno...

unpopular opinion: boromir has dark hair Sean Bean is an actor he’s not the only face

So I feel like there’s a bit of a structural problem with the LotR fandom. Characters are often written in pairs or as foils, and inevitably the comparison starts to turn towards “who’s better?” Then, if you don’t ship them, there’s a tendency to aggrandize one character’s virtues and minimize their flaws (which tends to happen everywhere), but then the comparison game starts. Because they have a paired character, the natural next step is to lionize your favorite by de-emphasizing the other character’s strengths and virtues (and sometimes also highlighting their flaws). (I’m not immune to this by far, btw, and am possibly about to engage in it.)

This happen the most with Frodo and Sam, but I think you also see it in Boromir and Faramir. Because obviously, in the books, Faramir is the golden child. Not in his father’s eyes, of course, but narratively speaking. And I have mad respect for him.

Most people don’t try and diss Faramir (because frankly. it’s hard. like, what are you going to say?), but there’s a tendency to downplay the fact that Boromir is his culture’s golden child, and Faramir...isn’t. Which isn’t to say Faramir isn’t beloved by those who know him, but his strengths are not valued in the same way that Boromir’s are. Faramir knows this. And given Boromir’s attitudes discussed above (how confidently he assumes his position in the world), I can’t believe he’s the 100% supportive, loving, sensitive, protective brother that fanon depicts him as. I don’t see how he can be.

Don’t get me wrong, I do believe the brothers love each other deeply. But growing up with siblings has taught me that it’s possible to love someone and yet be deeply wounded by them due to the casual and inescapable intimacy of your relationship? You can share more inside jokes and weird stories than anyone, yet you can never get away from how deeply they know you--not your thoughts, but who you are at home and who you were when you were seven and how you acted when someone broke up with you or what you did when your parents were furious.

You also know exactly how you match up against them, because you will always exist as a unit. And because your relationship is as natural as the lens  in your eye (you can’t imagine viewing the world without it), you forget about the other as a person and just say something and don’t think about how it hurts them. You can joke about this one thing and your sibling can carry around the hurt for years and you didn’t even know. And maybe the hurt isn’t even your fault--maybe they were just sensitive and you had no way of knowing, but the hurt doesn’t go away for the lack of malice. And even best-friend siblings are capable of malice towards each other at times.

So Boromir is good at things that Faramir isn’t, and Boromir knows it. He’s probably ribbed his brother in what he thinks is a playful way about when you’re going to shape up, or do X, or do Y, or why do you do that, anyways, or do you realize that’s a little unbecoming? maybe you should stop that. You know Father’s going to think that you’re... And he doesn’t realize how those slights can add up over the years. I do think he’s said things to his peers about his brother that have ended up hurting him. No matter how pure and nice he is, that sort of thing is unavoidable, and due to his cultural upbringing I don’t actually think he’d question the appropriateness of his attitude/acceptance and glorification of martial prowess at the expense of those who don’t have it in the same degree.

I think this passage is really telling:

For on the eve of the sudden assault a dream came to my brother in a troubled sleep; and afterwards a like dream came oft to him again, and once to me. 'In that dream I thought the eastern sky grew dark and there was a growing thunder, but in the West a pale light lingered, and out of it I heard a voice, remote but clear, crying:          Seek for the Sword that was broken:          In Imladris it dwells;          There shall be counsels taken          Stronger than Morgul-spells.          There shall be shown a token          That Doom is near at hand,          For Isildur's Bane shall waken,          And the Halfling forth shall stand. Of these words we could understand little, and we spoke to our father, Denethor, Lord of Minas Tirith, wise in the lore of Gondor. This only would he say, that Imladris was of old the name among the Elves of a far northern dale, where Elrond the Halfelven dwelt, greatest of lore-masters. Therefore my brother, seeing how desperate was our need, was eager to heed  the  dream and seek for  Imladris; but since the way was full of doubt and danger, I took the journey upon myself. Loth was my father to  give  me leave, and long have I wandered by roads forgotten, seeking the house of Elrond, of which many had heard, but few knew where it lay.' 

There’s so much you can read into this. Faramir has this dream, and he has it many times. We know he’s a lover of lore and no less devoted to his kingdom than Boromir, though his love is expressed differently. He is “eager” to heed the dream. So would I if I was having prophecy dreams all the time.

But is Faramir a member of the fellowship? No. Why? Because Boromir “took it upon himself.” He wanted to do it, he thought himself the better candidate (and Faramir the worse), and he argued his way into doing it against his father’s wishes. Coupled with Denethor’s later attitude towards Boromir, I’m inclined to believe Boromir was uniquely able to obtain this quest for himself because Denethor has a soft spot for him.

I find myself inclined to disregard Boromir’s account of Faramir’s motive (”how desparate was our need”), because it sounds like he’s justifying the appropriateness of his actions.  If it’s just about the great need of the kingdom, it’s nothing personal that one brother goes and the other stays. That view implies  that Faramir’s interest in this mission is primarily utilitarian in purpose, with a little academic curiosity--that is, it’s nothing personal. Doesn’t matter who goes! Not as long as we protect the kingdom! Which...just doesn’t square with his description of Faramir having repeatedly cryptic dreams that he wants to understand. I can almost guarantee that Faramir wants to know what those dreams meant more than Boromir.

It’s a bit tragic, because ultimately Faramir was more suited for the quest than Boromir (tramping about in the wilderness doesn’t seem to be a problem, he’s also a team player, and he’s much more willing to accept the power of the Ring/not downplay its personal danger, and would be able to see it in a bigger picture beyond just Gondor). Ultimately, though, if Boromir was the one to catch Frodo in Ithillien, the story would have a veeeeeeery different ending. (Gollum would likely be dead, and I can’t imagine he’d be inclined to just. let Frodo and Sam go free.)

I kind of view their relationship as a much less antagonistic version of Agravain and Gwalchmai from Gillian Bradshaw. (Agravain is more of a jerk than I can ever imagine Boromir being, and has a wicked temper). 

Also none of this is to say that I don’t think he’s not protective of his brother.

So a lot of words to say: I don’t think the Boromir and Faramir relationship is as uwu cinnamon roll as it seems in fandom. I think they loved each other, but I think Boromir did have a tendency to take what he wanted when he thought he deserved it and not give it a second thought, even when it was at the expense of his brother. Sure, he’d defend his brother night and day, but I expect him to be a bit of a jerk, be unaware of the extent of his behavior, and also see little wrong with it (the ring quest seems to have crossed a line, by the way he justifies it).

Still, they do love each other deeply and genuinely. It’s just a little more conflicted.

song i associate with them: Requiem, from Dear Evan Hanson. Not a particularly creative association (and I don’t associate him with Connor at all), but his death comes as such a shock at the beginning of TTT and brings with it so many mixed feelings due to both their relationship and the circumstances of his death. Nobody’s mourning is straightforward: not Frodo, or Denethor, or Faramir, or Aragorn, or Merry, or Pippin. His absense is woven throughout TTT and even RotK, in plot and in emotion and in theme.

favorite picture of them:

Don’t really have a favorite, but this one is nice.

The Sean Bean runners-up: one, two

[subtleshenanigans]

Finally watched The Two Towers, and some thoughts:

“I speak for the trees and the trees say SCREW YOU”

A pretty good war scene

I have much pity (not in a, how pitiful way, but I feel so bad for the dude) for Sméagol. He’s just a little dude. He started to do better, then had a mental break.

Frodo wanting Gollum to have redemption so he knows he can be saved

Samwise MgGee, what a lad

THIS is devotion in a platonic sense!!! They’re platonic soulmates

Gandalf *dies* *REVERSE UNO CARD*

Merry to Pippin: aren’t you tired of being nice? Don’t you just wanna go ********? (Kinda. It was the vibe)

Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas: we are the bros, here we goes, kicking some butt!!

Shiny caves

Boromir’s brother turning out to be a decent human being

HOBBITS ARE SO SMOL

None of these comments are in order btw

Gimli is a short king

Frodo falling into madness and so, so scared, but Sam is there

(Also in the book, the first one, it mentions that Frodo has enhanced eye sight, whether from the cursed wound or the influence of the ring I don’t recall. Either way he won’t be the same after this adventure.)

[derivativealigner]

I rewatched the second season of South Park and took so many notes that I had to split them into two parts. Like seriously, I took so. many. notes. And pictures this time. I started rewatching just in case I’d find some cool little facts to sprinkle into my fanfic but I went way too far and now there’s a million facts under this cut (including gay stan, a domestic violence psa, and craig fucking dying)

Stan doesn’t like hospitals, he finds them gross and he gets sick 🤮. Also the hospital in South Park is called Hell’s Pass hospital. Early seasons have the name as Hells Pass but it gets fixed later

Cartman has to sing all of Come Sailing Away by Styx if he hears a part of it. After he says this, Kyle sings the first part and Cartman has to sing the rest. Kyle does it again later, which is kinda mean

Cartman’s mom tries to abort Cartman, who is an eight-year-old child and thus cannot be legally aborted. Later, after she slept with Bill Clinton to change the law and make 40th trimester abortions legal, it turns out she meant adoption

Kenny sacrifices himself to turn on the generator to the hospital and save Dr. Mephesto’s life along with others. He says “I’ll fucking do it” then does it and dies, absolute legend

Cartman gets way too into his deputy role. He goes undercover, pretends to be a prostitute, says “Respect my authoritah!” a lot and beats people up with his police stick

Kenny’s brother first appears when Cartman responds to a call about a disturbance at Kenny’s house. Apparently there are like 10 adult family members in the house at that time. Kenny’s dad has a black eye because Kenny’s mom punched him. She says he can’t hold a job

Token sits in the classroom in season 2

Cartman starts hating hippies in this season, like a lot

Chef tells the boys that the right time to do drugs is in college

Ike’s name is Ike Moisha Broflovski and he was born in 1996, making him 2 years old in 1998 when this season aired

This is probably obvious but yeah Kyle and Ike are circumcised

Kyle says family isn’t just blood, it’s who you care about, and he says “That’s why you guys are more than just friends, you’re my family. Except for Cartman.”

Craig’s finally sitting in the classroom in S02E04

None of the boys like dodgeball

Clyde gets a dodgeball to the face and he cries :( and he’s the only one who cries by the way

Pip throws a dodgeball in Kyle’s face and breaks Kyle’s nose

When Kyle’s mom tells the boys about conjoined twin myslexia (which isn’t a real term) and says anyone might’ve absorbed their dead twin in the womb, Stan and Cartman run away screaming but Kenny and Kyle stay to listen. Kenny even leans in to look at the book “Freaks A-Z!” that Mrs. Broflovski is reading from, and when she leaves, Kyle grimaces and Kenny laughs

Stan’s mom (Sharon) calls Kyle’s mom (Sheila) when Stan is all freaked out and trying to put an icepick through his brain, and Sharon tells Sheila to get run over by a truck. Sharon is pretty mean in these early episodes

Mr. Broflovski doesn’t really listen to what Mrs. Broflovski is saying, bad husband >:(

South Park’s team is always called South Park Cows no matter the sport

The school nurse, Nurse Gollum, went to Colorado State University

I just realized Butters exists. I think he appeared before S02E05 but I didn’t notice but yeah he’s there with the dodgeball team, injured

Here’s a picture to make up for my disgusting anti-Butters bias

Kenny’s dodgeball uniform number is 69 obviously. Kyle is 7, Stan is 4, Cartman is 325

Sheila smacks Gerald in the face so hard he falls off his chair, lots of violence perpetrated by women in this show. Remember, don’t do domestic violence no matter your gender, it’s not cool

I realized after this whole Butters thing that I should’ve made more notes about Pip, so I’ll make a note about his anger issues now. When people call him French, he gets angry and throws dodgeballs at them

The boys launch a jelly roll at Ms. Crabtree and make her crash the bus. They do it just for fun

The kids somehow go to China in the school bus

Cartman references Moby Dick, but he probably doesn’t know what he’s talking about

Kevin Stoley gets named in S02E05 and has his first speaking role when he says he has Chinese parents and after Cartman hears it he immediately says something racist. smh cartman, what a problematic fave

Cartman says “I love you guys 😊” but Stan and Kyle just stare at him and he goes 😐 “Eh, screw you guys 😠”

If Jimbo and Ned really fought in Vietnam, they youngest they could’ve been in 1998 is early forties, which means in the latest seasons they would be early sixties. Btw they met in Vietman

Jesus and Pals is a recurring TV show in seasons 1 and 2. Jesus just kind of lives in South Park

I just remembered that Terrance and Phillip are really old in canon, it’s so weird, like how can South Park canon still be changing, it’s been 20 years

Also the early seasons are casually racist who knew

Kenny flashes his ass on a tape the boys send to Jimbo and Ned’s TV show, which airs and at least 12 people see Kenny’s bare naked ass

Cartman really doesn’t like hippies in these early seasons. He throws a chair at Ned and yells, “Take that, hippie!” (Ned is in a catatonic state and did nothing to provoke this)

Jimbo and Ned live together I guess. Jimbo’s gonna take Ned home and show him some hardcore porn to snap him out of his catatonic state, good husband unlike Gerald Broflovski

Saddam Hussein is in hell and has a Canadian accent and is Satan’s lover in S02E06, I guess he died in Canada in the first episode this season but I wasn’t paying much attention since that’s the Terrance and Phillip episode that pissed a bunch of people off in 1998 because the audience wanted to know who Cartman’s dad is instead. It was kind of a boring episode so I understand why everyone was pissed, but it is funny that Matt and Trey did that so I’m not mad about it

Aww look at them!!! We’ve got background Style, the vaguest inkling of Crenny, and Cartman/Cake

I’d take more screenshots but it’s a pain since I’m watching legally and stupid legal websites block screenshots so I have to find youtube videos instead ughhhh piracy is the answer kids

Apparently there’s a huge waterfall and canyon somewhere close to South Park, maybe? At least in Stan’s dream

Mary Kay Bergman was an incredible voice actor. How the hell did she voice all the moms, Wendy, Shelly, principle Victoria, the mayor, Nurse Gollum, and fucking Ms. Crabtree??? Holy shit what a queen

Kenny has some feelings about death. He reimagines the episode where death boops him to death and in his version, he beats death the fuck up, then has ice cream and is happy 😊 But again, this is in Stan’s dream

S02E07 kind of establishes that nobody remembers Kenny dying because when Cartman tells a story where Kenny dies, Kyle questions how Kenny could’ve died then when he also died just a few hours ago when a giant monster took him

rip craig, he falls out the bus and into a canyon

But it’s okay because it was all Stan’s dream so everything in the episode is questionable. Everything after this is no longer a dream

Pip’s parents are dead and he has to go to summer school while everyone else is having a nice summer break

Officer Barbrady and the mayor are having sexual relations, I’m sure this is the most interesting note I’ve made so far. Idk I’m just writing everything down, this is how I enjoy things, I have no off switch

Ew summer bus stop, cursed

Kyle casually sings little tunes every once in a while, how cute

This is pretty obvious but Kenny likes dirty jokes, he laughs when Cartman innocently says he loves Chef’s salty chocolate balls (which are chocolate candy). Nobody else laughs

Cartman says “Screw you guys, I’m going home” or variations of it a lot in this season

So Stan throws up when he likes someone, right? Well, he’s watching an indie movie about two gay cowboys who start making out and he throws up, which is either a terrible homophobic joke or confirmation that Stan’s a little gay. I know which one I prefer

Kyle says Mr. Hankey is his best friend after Stan. Like I know it’s definitely canon that Stan and Kyle are best friends but it’s still nice to see confirmation, it’s very precious. Also Kyle is best friends with literal shit, so cute 😊

Kenny deaths:

S02E02 Kenny sacrifices himself by connecting a generator wire, which electrocutes him but brings power back to a hospital

S02E03 A tree falls on Kenny and crushes him

S02E04 Kenny falls in a grave and the gravestone falls on him

S02E05 The Chinese dodgeball team throws a ball at Kenny and he gets splattered against a wall

S02E06 Two guys pull on Kenny and tear him in half, as in one has the head and one has the legs

S02E07 A big scary monster plucks Kenny out of the school bus and carries him away. Also in Cartman’s fake memory of Fonzi jumping over cars, the motorcycle hits Kenny and crushes him against a brick wall. Kenny gets smashed against walls a lot, doesn’t he?

S02E08 Flashback: Baby Kenny has a firecracker and it explodes, sprinkling little baby Kenny parts everywhere. Later in the episode, current day Kenny dies when a giant firework snake bumps him off a stage and under a fence, which then crushes him.

S02E09 Kenny is playing with a yoyo outside a movie theatre when a bunch of people come outside and trample him to death. They say “Oh my God, I found a penny!” and “You bastard!”

I’ll post part 2 of season 2 in a couple days. I’m having way more fun writing these stupid notes than I thought I would (also gnomes is coming up soon and i am fucking ready for tweek)

[fandom-sheep]

Wilbur Soot Origins (29 March 21)

Delayed live blogging Part 1/1

Ok so I’m late. But I saw near the beginning where they started planning. I also saw the naming before the minors joined.

Now Phil is building the second floor and Wilbur is being very charismatic.

Lil Niki in her water hole

Oh ooo Charlie. He just got lava’d.

Lil cat ear mermaid in her hole.

I’m glad Wilbur is making sure Niki feels included.

“That sounds like a threat” -Ranboo

“Can we keep the lanterns?” -Tubbo

I love the hydrophobic ones panicking in the rain and the hydrophilic people started celebrating.

Slime hunt! Slime hunt! Slime Hunt!

Wilbur and Charlie going off on their adventure again. Time for the chaos peeps.

I’m sorry we’re milking the slime...

I feel uncomfortable.

Wait... Niki didn’t keep wet? Who unalived Niki?

I bet it was Jack since he fell next.

The flower forest is so pretty.

A slime with a pet slime. Oh correction partial slime with a pet slime.

Wilbur has a dog? I haven’t heard this somehow? Ok the rest of chat doesn’t know either.

Yeah dogs set rules for you.

I’m sorry why does he step on the sweet lady pups tail.

Cotton! A great dog name!

Ooo a cocker spaniel. I love spaniels so much.

Dumping a dog on family members. Yep. Sounds right.

Chloe the funky something pup.

Chloe the black flat coat retriever

I love how chats always love dogs and cats. How it’s all just “awww”

Cotton and Chloe my beloveds. I love pets so much.

“How would you describe that process? Osmosis...” “Agonizing” -Wilbur and Charlie

Uber Slime

That is an externally scuffed seed. Just wall, and be circle hole pit thing.

Off he goes.

Understanding Zodiac is too much work. And a waste of time, but still too much work.

Backwards head ghost man.

Ahh. One of those family members.

Scuffed seed wandering

Desert Temple in the savanna.

Wilbur climbing the wall and Charlie going small. Lovely.

The “hey best friend” tiktok audio is fantastic.

I love all the people knowing the name of that audio. I just know the sound.

Apparently zodiac stuff makes a lot of trouble in dorms like where roommates and such don’t match????

Bird man can find the swamp

Ah. A kin list. Kin lists are funky. Depends on who you ask. Some say that it’s characters you relate to. In old tumblr it’s people you think you are.

Are you an old kin person or a young kin person is essentially it.

“How’s Twitter going?” -Wilbur

Chat running to Niki. We all love her so much.

Losing the slime boy in the grass.

“My natural state is just airborn” -Charlie

Chat still going on about Kin lists. Y’all, we’re talking about the small slime fighting a Gollum. There are better topics to laugh at.

Niki has requested some lovely kelp. The girl deserves it.

Awww. Wilbur is so dedicated to helping Niki.

Niki Just accepting the aggressive help.

“I would love to respond to you but half my screen is full of water” -Charlie

Wilbur gave the chat a whole 4 emotes and they love them.

I’m glad I can type here since Wilburs chat is sub only

Your new boyfriend 2 (aka attempt 2)

Your second new boyfriend

Tubbo’s the bee boy

Phil just doing has magical building stuff.

“She dried” -Charlie

Nikis soft “thank you”

Bars over the windows.

Also the brick is fantastic.

Skirting board. We just call them base boards.

He pressed shift.

He shifted, yet again.

Oh there is a subreddit? I need to check that out.

Someone make a bee origin for the bee boi

The Indian Jones theme song is just one of songs everyone starts singing.

Fight the Lorax

No don’t bring up the onceler. We don’t need extra tumblr in this.

Do we all just have this song memorized? Oh wait never mind he lost it.

Poor old Phil doesn’t know the Lorax

“Phil do you speak to the trees?” “Nope” -Several and Phil

I can’t see chat anymore btw. The switched off sub only and I can’t see anything.

I left and came back to see if it’d fix it. It didn’t and I had to watch an ad.

“This is for the Niki enclosure” -Wilbur

Poor Niki being treated like a zoo creature.

Oh that’s actually pretty smart.

A reverse chimney to let rain in.

Creeper aww man.

“Wasn’t even cause of your origin” -Ranboo (I think)

Phil removed the to do list. How sad.

We lost Niki!

Hooray! I got chat working for me again! I just needed to send a message to get it to work.

They haven’t explained how the new update will work.

Why is everyone panicking and screaming?

Wilburs trying to read chat to no avail.

Tubbo thinking too much.

Poor Jack is just suffering.

Alright I disappeared for a second. What did I miss?

We’re showing Niki how to swim quick.

Niki made it to the Tank!

Slime tank. Slime slithering around.

Will embracing his inner fish.

They’ve made it Niki accessible. But no one else. They have no roof.

Niki can extra attack the slime

I love that wilbur chose to burn for a moment to attack ranboo with water.

Soot boy searching for the bee origin.

They want really slow creative mode. I love it.

You go mod modders

I love the bee panic button

Please. Slime boi jump on a slime block.

According to a random thing in chat it’s been 2 hours.

Long stream for Wilbur

Phil taking Charlie to the swamp

Can the enderman get in the water cauldron.

A good screenshot. Get your thumbnails y’all!

Everyone getting their thumbnails.

Wilbur doing the photography.

Cauldron water does effect the enderman

I saw someone asking about Fragrance Man. As though schlatt doesn’t have a lot of extra drama right now.

Fight everyone Niki!

Wilbur is both the nicest to Niki and the meanest.

Feed the fish!!

Pollute the pond. Pollute the tank.

Niki isn’t a merling. She is a fighting fish.

It’s just be mean to Niki time isn’t it?

Someone should start encouraging primes.

Lovely ringing.

A phantom! A friend! Angry friend but friend!

He’s dancing in the window! A fantabulous phantom.

Ah. Makes sense that Wilbur is heading to bed. Been a long stream for him.

Oh he’s not leaving us yet. I was saying bye.

We raiding Niki! We raiding our favorite girl!

And poof. Off we go to Niki!

I’m going to make a new post for this see ya in a second.

[beautiful-a-disaster]

So I accidentally named my cat…

When I met my cat we found her in a ditch on the side of the highway. She’d been hit by a car, but wasn’t terribly injured. She was hurting though, and had some blood matted in her fur. There was no telling how long she was there really. We decided to pick her up and nurse her back to health. And when we knew she was feeling a little bit better we decided to give her a bath.

Now on a side note you could tell that she had been somebody’s cat before. She has been spayed and declawed (btw don’t do that to your cats guys, it’s not good for them.)

Up until this point we couldn’t find a name that we though fit her. We wanted to find something that would stick. Little did we know I would accidentally name her during bath time.

There we were, my brother, mother, sister, and I trying to give this cat a bath and get the blood out of her coat. We were having an incredibly hard time with it because she had such a strong grip and she would pull her way out of our grip so easily because we were also being careful not to hurt her. She made it really had though.

I decided it would be a good idea to get in the tub and hold her like that. Since it’d probably be easier to do it that way. Nope, she crawled her way onto my shoulder and was not moving an inch.

Here’s the moment that gave her, her name. I know the majority of people(hopefully) have seen, read, or heard of The Hobbit or Lord of the Rings. If so, then you will know the creature Gollum has a hatred for hobbits and continually calls them “tricksy hobbits”. In my house, we are major fan and re-watch the movies and re-read the books often.

We manage to get her back into my lap and she fights a bit more before she finally settles down and makes our task slightly easier, but none of us are prepared for what happens next. She quickly pounces out of my arms and onto the floor speeding off across the house leaving a soapy trail be behind her. My mother screams with the sudden surprise my siblings chasing her and me still sitting in the bathtub goes “She’s a tricksy cat. You know, kind of like a tricksy hobbit, but a car instead!” While laughing my ass off.

My mom stops, looks me dead in my face with the most excited look. I’m really confused so I just sit there like ‘what?’. Then she’s yelling “THATS IT! THATS HER NAME!” And she’s clapping and practically bouncing up and down she’s so excited. I’m still just sitting there like “what did I say?”.

When my siblings finally managed to wrangle her and bring her back, mom tells us “Her name is Trixie, but not spelled like tricksy hobbits. No, her name will be spelled T-R-I-X-I-E cause that’s cooler.” And we just laughed and went with it as we managed to finish giving her a bath.

Here we are 2 years later with our favorite girl, Queen Trixie, who we love very dearly and to this day we are still amazed by some of the tricksy habits.

Tricksy humans baths aren’t for cats.

[bilbobagginsbrainrotblog]

Three things that i often see missed when talking about Sam are;

a) His youth- Sam is a lot younger than most of the main cast. This doesn't play as large of a role in his story as it does Pippin, who's character arc in lotr is a grim coming of age story, but it is important when speaking in terms of characters like Frodo and Faramir and Gollum. Sam hadn't even come of age when Bilbo left. When he met Frodo as a young child, Frodo was already a tween. People who criticize Sam (which is good btw! His character isn't perfect and thats what makes him interesting) note that he's often impulsive and quick to anger. And this makes sense being that he's still a very young man who has not yet learned to temper his edge.

b) His class. I'm not fully equipt to talk about this one and im sure there's a paper out there that does it better, but it would be impossible to discuss Samwise Gamgee without adressing the class structure he adheres to. He loves Frodo; as a childhood friend and more closely and deeply than that. But he also considers Frodo to be above him. This is a mindset he continually has to reaffirm to himself throughout the quest, as he and Frodo become closer and he must take on more of a leadership role, and the line becomes blurred. It also, I think, contributes to his anger in the Gollum situation. He's been taught that his opinion is worth less than others, and to defer to Frodo's judgement, and he does- but it angers and frustrates him because he also believes he knows better in this situation. Frodo is sometimes praised for having more of a capacity for empathy than Sam, especially regarding Gollum. While this is likely partially true, in that only Frodo could relate to gollum due to their shared experiences with the ring, I don't think Sam is simply devoid of empathy. Sam's world is smaller than Frodo's- he hasn't had the same benefit of books and journeys and stories. He relies heavily on others for his queues, and reacts badly when something foreign intrudes upon what he knows. Sam doesn't have the same wealth of experience and maturity of age that Frodo has to draw upon. But it is important to note that despite his sometimes downright scary homicidal tendancies towards gollum, when faced with a solo chance to actually kill him on Mt. Doom, he has by that time matured enough to pity him, and chooses to let him live. Both of these things culminate in a character arc that is centered on;

C) Self-doubt and self actualization. Sam does not believe he has a role in saving Middle Earth beyond being a packhorse until late into the story. Despite making many of the important decisions that would shape the fate of the quest, his internal monologue is riddled with moments of questioning and self doubt. The best example passage of this, I think, is when he believes Frodo to be dead. Putting aside his near suicidal grief, he crumbles at the notion the he, Samwise Gamgee, could ever be the one to carry the one ring. He doesn't feel like he has the right, and at every turn he's crippled by the fear that he'll mess it up somehow. This doesn't really translate into the movieverse, I think, which is a shame because it's intregal to Sam's character- his journey from "Halfwise Gamgee" who was too young, too common and too simple to be a hero, to someone who does not hesitate to rally a revolution when he returns to find his home besieged and goes on to become a leader.

i think its weird that despite being widely praised as one of the best and most beloved characters in lotr, a lot of people seem to view samwise gamgee as a one dimensional character or reduce his role in the story to either "hero" or "sidekick" when he's actually extremely complicated

[kashyyyyk]

The Fellowship of the Ring (II) - Chapter 6: Lothlórien & Chapter 7: The Mirror of Galadriel

“When he had gone and passed again into the outer world, still Frodo the wanderer from the Shire would walk here, upon the grass among elanor and niphredil in fair Lothlórien.”

same, tbh. it’s interesting to compare the feel of Rivendell with that of Lothlórien. Rivendell seems to me a place of knowledge rather, preserving the Elves’ culture and maybe their “military” history as well and the alliances with the other races, its location being sort of remote from the other Elven regions that are still left. Lothlórien on the other hand seems to me to hold and preserve the “soul” of the Elves and the part of their history that goes back way further, back to Aman. after all, Galadriel granddaughter of Finwë lives here.

these two chapters in Lothlórien are such a blessing after the (literal and figurative) darkness Moria, and you do get that feeling that you’d want to stay there forever. which at the same time feels like a trap, which in turn reflects the Elves situation so well, I think. the melancholy and the sadness. this part of the world is still so beautiful, and evil won’t touch it, but at the same time that’s an illusion, because it doesn’t change the fate of the rest of the world, which they care about so much. too much so that they can’t seem to keep caring about it, paradoxically - gaad, I know I might be projecting my own shit here, but I feel this so hard tbh.

metaphorically, Galadriel’s test when Frodo offers her the Ring. she could take it and change the Elves’ fate and the fate of the rest of the world, but at what price and would it lead to anything good in the grand scheme of things? she knows their time is over and they have to leave things in the hands of others. she must feel so powerless, but at the same time so weary and ready to let this go. 

fuck, okay, maybe some less sad things. Gimli and Legolas seem to have burried their prejudices after all, good good; Gollum is super close now, quite funny in fact that he eludes even these Elves; and of course: HALDIR ♥! v good. btw, Aragorn as a leader is something I can get behind, obviously. also wow, only 3 more short chapters and FotR will be finished! 

[southernconundrum-blog]

Making a Case for 13 Going on 30.

I can still remember my Wednesday evening History of Film class in Film school. (Yes I went to film school, we can still like cheesy rom-coms) And the night my professor, a former DP for Columbia during the “golden age of film” stood in front of the entire class and proclaimed we were about to view, what most experts call the greatest film of all time. You guessed it, Citizen Kane. 

He went on to explain that what made it so great was the technicality and the innovation of it. The first film to use flashback and continuous wide shots, blah blah. I thought it was a snooze fest of straight white male nonsense. Yeah technically it’s cool they did all that with cut and paste film. I respect that shit, I do. But Citizen Kane is one of the most un-relatable stories ever. At least to me as a gay woman. It’s like the Catcher in the Rye of film. I have a hard time identifying with rich white dudes who feel like they don’t belong in a world created for and by them. If anyone actually read this blog I bet I’d get ALL the haters up in here leaving me comments about how oppressed men are now. Do it. I masturbate with male tears.

ANYWAYS. Fuck Citizen Kane in it’s boring ass face. I’m here to talk about the greatest movie of all time. The movie that is best picture every year in my heart and soul always and the one movie by which every other movie is measured. 13 Going on Motherfucking 30.

Yes it’s entertaining. Yes it’s a feel good romish-com with a cute cast. Yes it has Judy Greer. But what makes it the best? I’ll break it down for you.

CAST:

We all know about JGar and MRuff, and before we get to Judy Greer, let’s talk about the supporting cast: 

Christa B Allen 

For you true Jgar fans you’ll note that this was not Christa’s only time playing a young Jen. She also does in Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (another one of my faves but more problematic). Christa’s got the looks and the chops. She’s not only a dead ringer for the younger Rink, she’s also actually a great actress. Here’s what she looks like now BTW.

Pretty fucking spot on from the casting director I’d say. So if Christa B. Allen was the homerun, Sean Marquette (young MRUFF) is the grand slam. 

Then and now:

Yeah that could be Mark Ruffalo in the early 2000′s. And Sean does a great job himself in the younger role. Moving on.

BRIE OSCAR WINNER CAPTAIN MARVEL LARSON

In a bit part with ONE freaking line. She nailed it by the way. That’s how extra this movie is. Oscar winners as basically extras.

FUN FACT THAT ONLY A PSYCHO WOULD KNOW:

When Jenna is looking at her yearbook with Matty years later, it flashes this picture of the Six Chicks:

Notice Jenna is now “practically their leader” and Brie Larson is nowhere to be found. Presumably she has already been kidnapped and is in ROOM. Too dark? Or too REAL.

ANDY FUCKING SERKIS

You can use IMDB to go through this guy’s laundry list of amazing credits. And don’t stop at Gollum in LOTR because he was basically just getting started in this bitch. He’s also an accomplished director. He plays Jenna and Lucy’s (tom-tom) boss and the editor of Poise magazine. He’s also gay bc representation in 2004 hella mattered.

KATHY BAKER (Jenna’s mom)

Where have you seen her? Bitch, everywhere. She has a staggering list of nominations and awards from film, tv and stage where she’s had a phenomenal career. My favorite roles are between that gem up there in Edward Scissorhands and the woman of many marriages in the Jane Austen Book Club. She’s a legend and she’s NOT EVEN THE STAR OF THIS FILM.

Marcia DeBonis (Jenna’s admin asst)

It’s easier to tell you what she HASN’T been in. Like Kathy Baker, she’s made a career out of small, scene stealing roles. She also has a pretty impressive career in casting. 

I’m not going do Jen and Mark because we all know all of their shit. I’m the biggest JGar fan on earth so don’t get me started, but they are obviously mega stars and I need to save some room for.......here it comes...it’s finally here...you know it was coming..and here WE. FUCKING. GO.

JUDITH THERESE EVANS GREER

If Judy BAD BITCH OF LIFE Greer is in a movie? I’m seeing it. Why? BC SHE’s in EVERY MOVIE. Judy Greer is a brilliant silky chameleon with ferrari engine precision comedic timing. I would say she ties with Melanie Lynksey for all time underrated actress in history, but I think she pushes just past her since her body of work is unbelievably large. She has done indie, rom-com, sci-fi blockbuster, you name it. She can and has done anything and everything and I love her with every sad and broken cell in my fangirl body. She doesn’t support scenes, she carries them. And the only reason you think someone else is the star is because Judy wants you to think that. There are like 2 people on this Earth I love as much as I love Judy Greer and they are basically my mom and Claire Danes. She is an angel we do not deserve sent to us straight from a place we can never know. I legitimately worry that not enough people know what a treeey zzzurrre we have in Judy. I will do whatever I can to always spread the Gospel of Greer in this flaming shit bag of a world. If you haven’t seen Addicted to Fresno, please excuse yourself from whatever meaningless nonsense you’re doing right now to go watch it. Thanks.

STORY

A perfect cast, and yes this is one, does not a good film make on it’s own (see all those shitty Gary Marshall vignette films). 

Lucky for us we also have a perfect story.  This film has everything: redemption, friendship, love, betrayal, materialism, capitalism, competition, fucking TIME TRAVEL. And a dance number to goddamn Thriller. 

This movie created the catch-phrase, “Fabuloso”, which would eventually become the best smelling cleaning product of all time. It brought back Razzles, no doubt saving that entire brand from bankruptcy. It has complicated parental relationships, complex female friendships, a pre-wedding love confession scene, an NYC fall photoshoot montage, an accidentally fall-down kiss scene, a popular high school guy now a balding loser scene, a heroine saves the magazine scene, and a Pat Benetar slumber party pillow fight. 

SETTING

NEW. MOTHERFUCKING. YORK. CITY. Is there any other place where a 30 year old can be the editor of a fashion magazine and live in an $8 million apartment???

SOUNDTRACK

I mean, you’ve got The Go-Go’s, Whitney Houston, Madonna, Billy Joel, Liz Phair, Rick Springfield, Talking Heads, Soft Cell, I COULD ON AND ON. 

CONCLUSION

I am a rom-com SLUT. I have seen all of them, but this one is the stand out. Instead of limiting Jenna to the “she falls in love and finally changes her life” trope, it explores ALL the reasons Jenna’s life went off track. Not just because she lost her best friend along the way, but because now she’s dishonest, disloyal, and though she has the trappings of the life she dreamed of, she isn’t the person she thought she would be. In fact, Matty is not even the main thread of all of it. 

The takeaway here is that being present is more important than worrying and wishing about the future.Which is actually some intense deep Buddhist shit. 

By living in the moment we’re in, we can shape our lives however we want. Jenna was so intent on creating her idea of a perfect life, that she missed what was right in front of her. When she got a glimpse of what she thought she wanted, she realized how empty it was. The money, the cool job, the $8 million apartment doesn’t mean shit when you don’t have any real connections to anyone. And is there any better moment then when she goes back to her closet birthday party, kisses Matty and slams Tom-Tom’s drink in her face and calls her a “Biatch”? NO. It’s the most satisfying moment in American cinema. 

TWO THINGS

1.This movie has 0 diversity and is 100% straight white people problems. I acknowledge it. It is problematic. I don’t know what to say. It was the time, I didn’t make the movie, and thank the lorde things are changing.

2.Lucy’s take on Poise re-branding was 100,000% better than that Abercrombie bullshit Jenna came up. Don’t @ me.

JUDY GREER 2020