#and then they were like debating if people didn’t care enough to intervene in the abuse

[6kate1bishop6]

so i went to my uni book club for the first time and we read jennette mccurdys memoir and like oh my god no one got it like i got it

[garbria]

Helpless

For Febuwhump day 1

Cor punched the bag in a steady rhythm, wishing he could afford to pull his katana. Unfortunately, Clarus, and then Regis, had convinced him the level of destruction he was capable of would be ultimately unproductive. And taken out of his paycheck, though that threat was more effective during his pre-Marshal days.

Still, despite all their arguments to the contrary, he wished for the freedom to swing Kotetsu. The familiar patterns weren’t holding his attention without the edge of steel. The whirl of emotions churned in his chest unabated.

With a growl, he hit the bag one last time, ignoring the smattering of blood left on the bag. This wasn’t working. He knew better than try and spar in this mood. Clarus was too busy, as was Regis, and the only other person who could reliably handle him in this state was the reason he was in this state to begin with.

He stalked out of the gym, grabbed a light jacket from his locker, and snuck out one of the side entrances. Thankfully, he was a familiar enough presence that no one took note as he hit one of the jogging paths around the Citadel at a faster than usual jog. The fresh air and the impact of his feet on the pavement started to do what his previous workout had not.

He wasn’t that hotheaded kid who’d run off to fight the Blademaster anymore, no matter what Clarus insinuated. He’d grown into command, learned to pick his battles, and made a kind of peace with not being able to be everywhere he was needed. He would never quite be used to being helpless when his people were in the field, but he’d learned to cope.

None of that helped today.

He loved Nyx, he did. More than that, he respected him. He was the best in the glaive for a reason. He was swift, deadly, and more than capable of handling himself on the battlefield, even with his ridiculously noticeable battle dress. His lethal grace was one the first things that drew Cor to him. Then his sly sense of humor and genuine good heart finished capturing Cor’s heart.

Cor knew how skilled Nyx was. He’d seen him in action, sparred with him enough to know what a force he could be. He reminded himself of that every time Nyx went out into the field when Cor’s responsibilities kept him here in Insomnia. Nyx’s sense of duty rivaled his own, yet another reason he’d fallen so completely. So he’d come to terms with the risks inherent in Nyx’s job, more or less. Held tight to the knowledge of Nyx’s competence in the dark of the night, and breathed a sigh of relief every time he returned.

He’d thought he’d come to terms with it, anyway. Nothing had prepared him for the ransom video. Nyx had been gone longer than expected, but not quite long enough for concern. Until the plain brown envelope had been delivered to his desk. The courier service had been paid by anonymous money order, one not even Monica could track down. 

The video, despite the poor lighting, showed what was clearly Nyx, bloodied and dazed. The ransom demands had been a pull back of forces and the return of a few prisoners. The damn Niffs were officially claiming ignorance, but everyone knew that was a polite fiction. It was political now, and Regis had barred him from any discussions. 

His chest burned with anger and helplessness and a hundred other emotions he didn’t feel like naming. He wanted to yell and scream and destroy things. None of it would help.

His relationship with Nyx wasn’t supposed to put him in more danger. 

Intellectually, he knew why Regis and Clarus had locked him out of the planning. It didn’t make him feel any better. He wanted to do something, anything to help the man he’d grown to care so much for.

He found himself back at the Citadel with no memory of the intervening time. He wasn’t even winded, despite taking the whole path at more of run than a jog. He stared at the door and its electronic keypad, debating turning around and running the path again. His mind was still a jumble of anger and despair, but maybe another circuit would work better. 

His pocket buzzed, and he almost dropped his phone in his rush to dig it out of his pocket. He unlocked it to find a text from Clarus calling him to Regis’ office.

Finally. They’d found something he could do, some way he could actually help. 

Just hold on, Nyx. He was coming.

[broken-clover]

OKAY!! kydizzy with clinging!! the sweethearts deserve a bit of desperate contact methinks

Unfortunately I took 'desperate' and probably took it in the wrong direction. Uh, apologies if you wanted this to be fluffy, I guess it sort of is in a way, just not the usual. I'm digging up the pre-overture era stuff because that offers so much for protective Dizzy

-

Leo had come back with nothing to show for it but a heavily bleeding arm, prompting panic among the people who had been waiting for him.

“Y-your majesty?” One of the castle staff covered their mouth in horror. “Good lord, what happened?”

Daryl quickly intervened, trying to keep the peace. “Someone will escort you to the infirmary immediately in order to stop the bleeding.”

“Gah, of course, of course, Daryl, I’m not so thickheaded that I would just let this bleed.” Leo huffed back at him.

“...I take it that your discussion didn’t get very far?”

He hung his head. “She won’t listen. I tried to explain, but either she can’t understand like this, or she just doesn’t want to hear it.”

“Your majesties, will we be moving on to firepower as an option?”

”Absolutely not.” Daryl immediately shut the man down. “Barring any concern we may have for it also harming the First King, it is likely that it will only aggravate her further.”

Someone in the back muttered to themself. “This is what we get for having a Gear as a queen.”

“Pardon?” Said Leo, looking for the individual among the group. “Would someone like to say that louder for us?”

Daryl shook his head. “Leo, don’t. Focus on yourself right now. Ellsworth, escort King Leo so he may receive some kind of medical treatment before he passes out.”

“Yessir.”

“For now,” he turned back to the rest. “I will attempt diplomacy of my own accord. No disrespect to my colleague, but I feel I could offer a more careful form of negotiation. We all want the same thing, after all.”

Several of them looked hesitant, but nobody could bring themselves to contradict the remaining king. They only watched as he headed down the same hallway that Leo had returned from, breath held in the hopes that this time wouldn’t involve more bloodshed.

Daryl was always good at putting on a stoic front. That wasn’t to say he was frightened, but negotiations with Gears wasn’t something richly illustrated in the history of debate. This wasn’t quite a hostage situation, but it wasn’t much of a pleasant chat, either. He simply hoped it would be over fast.

The castle started to show its damage as soon as he rounded the corner. Nobody had been able to remove the door yet, so it remained firmly lodged in the wall opposite of where it should have been. The remaining doorframe jutted out like a splintery flower. It had all been pushed back by one strong blow, and the carpet was scorched, decorated with a hearty blood spatter. 

However, Daryl never thought he would say it, but the horrible mess would have to go ignored for now. He did his best to give off the air of politeness and calm, and stepped into the doorway.

“Miss Dizzy?

In the darkness, a pair of scarlet lights snapped to face him. A shiver ran down his spine. He tried to stifle it. 

“We have spoken before. I am Third Ki-”

A spike of ice soared past his head, missing by little more than an inch. While he winced, Daryl realized it had been intentional. A warning shot. Just speaking to her had been enough to get that response. This was worse than he had thought.

Ky was still passed out in her arms, shivering and pale. When he stopped to look, it was obvious now- the thinness, the shaking, the vigor vanishing from his body- of course, nobody had thought to care until Dizzy decided that they were going to, and very quickly. That was the funniest part of this whole thing, if he could dare to call any of it funny. Despite the half-mad bioweapon he was currently in the hands of, Ky wasn’t in any sort of danger whatsoever. She had made that very clear. Dizzy was protecting him from everyone else.

Daryl reminded himself of that. Dizzy wasn’t a monster to be subdued, he was supposed to be there to coax a truce.

“I’m sorry,” he ventured, careful but pleased to see her not immediately go on the offensive again. “We all are. Truly, so very sorry. We want to help him. We can’t give him the help he needs here. If you let us bring him to-”

He was cut off by a sharp, catlike hiss. “YOUR FAULT.” Her pupils narrowed further into slits. “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT.

He nodded. “I know. We made a terrible mistake. I understand that now. You have helped us to understand. Please, let us do what is right now.”

“NOBODY ELSE WILL PROTECT HIM. I WILL. I MUST.” Her tail lashed at the air, showing off its razor teeth. What he had thought was a shadow at first was a dark stain on otherwise-immaculate white. Daryl knew it could extend, but he wasn’t sure by how much. He could never assume full safety here.

“I know.” He said again. “You just want what’s best for him. I admire that. I want to help him, too.”

Dizzy stared him down, teeth gritted. Now there were two separate sets bared in his direction. “NO. NO YOU DON’T. YOU NEVER DID.”

“Miss Dizzy-”

“DON’T LIE TO ME!” She roared, the walls shaking from the force. “LEAVE BEFORE I MAKE YOU!”

This was treading on very thin ice now. Daryl didn’t want to throw in the towel just yet. “You can’t even consider?”

“NOBODY ELSE WILL HELP HIM. LEAVE.”

Her long tail lashed out at him, forcing a retreat. He squeezed out into the relative safety of the hallway, looking himself over for wounds he may not have noticed. Dizzy hadn’t left a scratch.

A complete and utter failure. He hadn’t gotten anywhere with her. Maybe he hadn’t deserved to. For all her inelegant rambling, she hadn’t been especially wrong.

After waiting several minutes, Daryl hesitantly peered into the room. He expected Dizzy would attack him properly as soon as she saw his face again, but she didn’t even look up. Through the low light, he could see her carefully wrapping Ky up in a quilt, butting their foreheads together and clinging onto him tightly. If he strained his ears, he swore he could make out a soft, sniffling humming.

[parkersbliss]

My Girl | B. Barnes

pairing: (tfatws) bucky barnes x female!reader, slight SLIGHT john walker x reader

warnings: no-no words, john walker, tfatws spoilers?

wc; 800ish

synopsis: first he takes the shield, and then tries to take you? not on bucky’s watch

a/n: oh man have I missed writing for bucky

Masterlist | Taglist | Prompt List

—

“John!” You exclaim, hopping into the vehicle and giving him a brief hug. “Wow, look at you!”

He laughs, stepping back, showing off his new uniform. “It’s different, isn’t it?”

You nod, mouth open. “Yeah, really.”

“You guys know each other?” Bucky asked, taking a hesitant seat.

“Yeah, we went to high school together. We went to prom together one year.”

Walker chuckles, “Yeah, it was a fun time.”

You force a laugh. “Maybe for you, I remember that night very differently.”

Walker shrugs, and Bucky doesn’t read the slight tension between you. He’s too busy keeping himself in check, his jaw tightening at your friendly interaction. This was the guy replacing Steve.

How could you like him?

He was never going to amount to the kind of person Steve was, not even half.

But here you were treating him like he was.

“(L/N), you went to prom with this guy?” Sam asked, the same disproving expression on his face.

You give a tight-lipped smile, “Yeah, high school prom. Don’t give me that look.”

“What look?” He said, giving you a cheeky smile.

You roll your eyes at the two boys, sitting back next to Bucky and across from Walker.

You were well aware of the strong distaste towards Walker, and honestly, you don’t blame them. Even you were still slightly bitter about it.

But Walker had been your friend, Sam and Bucky would give him enough shit anyway, might as well be the nice guy.

Though, if you had the chance, you would gladly snatch the shield from his hands. Walker was a good person, as far as you could remember. But the only person worthy of that shield was Steve. You knew that.

But until Walker does something unworthy of it, the shield belongs to him.

“How’d you end up here?” Walker asked, gesturing between you and the boys. Clearly, he’s only talking to you.

“What do you mean?”

“How’d you end up working with them? I mean, don’t get me wrong. Mad respect for you both, but I just think you’d be more helpful with me. Clearly, we won’t be working together.”

Your lips part unsure if that was an insult directed at Bucky and Sam, and if you should give some sort of snarky response.

“My first priority is them, John.”

The said boy holds his hand up in defense. He can sense the accusatory tone in your voice. He really doesn’t want to piss you off of all people. He needs you on his side, not theirs. “Right, sorry, (N/N). I should’ve known.”

Bucky’s eyes narrow at the use of the nickname. His hands are clenched together as he resists the urge to slap the smirk off of Walker’s face. Bucky could care less about your past with him. If given the chance, he would gladly shove that shield down his throat.

Walker was the enemy, no questions about it.

“You look great by the way,” Walker smiled. “I don’t think I said that earlier. Just as beautiful as prom day.”

Before you get a chance to reply (not that you had one, you were debating between telling him to be professional or a simple thank you), Bucky grabs your arm.

“That’s it, we’re leaving,” He said as the driver stops the vehicle so the heroes can jump out.

“It was just a compliment!” Walker called out, laughing to himself. “I’ll see you around!”

Bucky shakes his head, sending Walker a death glare. “No, you won’t.”

Walker quirks an eyebrow at the ex-assassin, but then the vehicle starts up again, and he’s gone.

As soon as he is, you shake yourself from Bucky’s grip, eyeing him up and down. “What the hell was that?”

Sam stays silent, trying to hide the grin on his face as he knows what’s about to come.

“That was fucking Walker flirting with you!”

“Bucky-”

“No, okay, listen to me, he doesn’t get to prance in here all Captain America thinking he can save the day and take my girl.”

Sam chokes, coughing loudly to cover it up. He repeatedly hits his chest, looking away.

Once he’s done, you look to Bucky, eyebrows raised. “My girl?”

Bucky smacks his lips together, rubbing his chin. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant,” He sighs, “I don’t know. Walker just gets on my nerves. If you like him, that’s fine, and it’s not my place to intervene.”

You scoff, a smile spreading across your lips. “I don’t give a damn about Walker. There’s only one person that has my heart anyway.”

Bucky’s lips quirk up into a smile. The action is so minimal you almost miss it. “You’re talking about me, right?”

You shrug, “I only see one jealous super soldier boyfriend.”

“I wasn't jealous!” Bucky huffs.

“Right,” You said, rolling your eyes before smirking. “You’re not denying the second part.”

“Maybe I don’t want to,” Bucky whispers, the air around you growing thicker as he takes a small, tentative step towards you.

“Oh my god!” Sam shouts, throwing his hands up in the air. “Just kiss already and agree to a date. Some of us have a life to get to.”

Bucky chuckles at Sam, but he listens and grabs your face between his hands before kissing you softly.

You smile into the kiss, grabbing the hair at the nape of his neck and pulling him closer.

“For the record,” You said when he pulled away. “The night ended horribly with Walker because he tried to kiss me.”

“That asshole-”

— END —

tagged: @yodaboo​

[akajb84]

THE MISSING YEARS (AO3 / FFN)

We’re BACCCCKKKK!!! I know, I know, it’s been WAY TOO LONG. But, we’ve finally got Act IV written and we’re ready to share it with you. It’s the final piece of their journey leading up to the start of FK and you aren’t going to want to miss it (although you may hate us). 

—

Summary:

What *really* happened after Jurassic World? What was the fallout for Claire? For Owen? How did they go from agreeing to stick together to falling out over a van? What was the catalyst for Claire to start the DPG? What’s the truth about Owen’s past? How did Wu and Mills connect?

Follow the ups and downs of Claire, Owen, Mills, Wu and more from the fallout of Jurassic World through to their arrival at Lockwood Estate in Fallen Kingdom.

Prologue Act I - Immediate Fallout Act II - Shelter from the Storm Act III - Knocked Off Track Act IV - Is This What Closure Looks Like?

Cover Image thanks to @hiraeth-doux 😁

—

Last time on The Missing Years: Act III concluded with Claire settling into her new life in San Francisco and grappling with unsettled feelings about both her future and her past. Owen was avoiding officially settling onto a property on loan from a friend of Lowery's as well as debating whether or not to contact Claire after learning about her depression from Karen. Meanwhile, the Indoraptor was recuperating from implant surgery as Eli confirmed that Blue is alive. Henry sparred with Eli over expanding their Nublar extraction plans.  

—

Act IV — Chapter 1

December 2017

Owen was late. He could blame the traffic driving up from the Sierras, but that was not only lame but untrue. The truth was that he had obsessed over his clothing — what was that about? He had also spent way too long grooming, or "manscaping," as Angie had teased him when he'd shaved off his beard in advance of the wedding. Just as Angie hadn't bought that he shaved it for himself (turning over a new leaf), Owen doubted anyone would buy that he had a legitimate reason for getting into Tahoe so late. Least of all his gracious and patient hosts.

Lowery and Andrea had invited him to an informal gathering of wedding guests at one of the resort's lounges. It was taking place after the rehearsal dinner. A dinner that was just for the wedding party. Although Owen had declined his offer to join that 'party,' he still wondered if Claire had accepted. If he was being honest — a difficult thing currently — everything was an excuse. His feelings were completely jumbled. He both wanted to stay and to bolt, in equal measure.

Entering the room, Owen saw (and heard the collective 'awwws' of) a group of people clustered near the bar. Perfect timing, he thought. Someone was probably showing off baby pictures or some other cutesy shit. He bit back a groan as he scanned the room. As if on cue, Lowery's head popped up from the back of the cluster.

"Hey, man!" his friend gleefully called out while motioning him to join. The cluster immediately expanded to reveal Claire sitting in the center and holding a phone. Owen's stomach dropped. Gripped by a sudden fear that Claire had a baby in their time apart, his heart raced as he silently counted the months since he'd last laid eyes on her. It was mathematically possible. Was it his or someone else's? Surely, she would've told him if it'd been his. Suddenly, Owen felt nauseated. It was clearly not enough that he struggled to remember how to breathe in front of her. Maybe he'd aspirate vomit and be saved from this entire weekend by an emergency hospital stay.

With a concerned look, Lowery intervened and clarified what was happening, "Claire was just showing us photos of your… uh… her dog." Owen's eyes went wide but didn't deviate from Lowery's face. To his credit, the groom looked contrite, if a bit intoxicated. Owen didn't care to witness Claire's reaction to their friend's gaffe.

"Wally," Owen responded resignedly with a nod. All the breath escaped from his body in a long whoosh. He felt sweat bead on his brow like a fever had broken. As his thoughts calmed, a new shock dawned on him. Claire had kept Wally all this time. Beyond that, she was showing him off. His earlier fears were confirmed. She'd chosen a dog over him. The weekend was off to a stellar start. Of course, maybe if he started at the bottom, there was only one way to go. His gaze quickly flicked to Claire, but she was re-engaged in her conversation. He vaguely heard something about a dog park before focusing his energy back on Lowery.

CONTINUE READING ON AO3 OR FFN

[onceupona-chaos]

Cassian and Azriel's reactions to the Archeron sisters

Everything will be supported by the text. English is not my first language, so sorry for any possible mistakes. Be kind and respectful!

I will begin this post with the scene that was the starting point of my thoughts.

The two Illyrians paused their inspection of me long enough to note my sisters finishing up breakfast, Nesta in a pale gray gown that brought out the steel in her eyes, Elain in dusty pink.

Both males went a bit still. But Azriel sketched a bow—while Cassian stalked for the dining table, reached right over Nesta’s shoulder, and grabbed a muffin from its little basket.

Very often Azriel and Cassian show the same reaction to the sisters (in this case, they go still). The scene above is a perfect example of that and of how SJM is always very faithful to the differences between the couples: there's a difference of personality, which will be the one I'll focus here, and of "romantic status". Differently from Nessian, Elain and Azriel were in love with different people when they met each other. We don't know what was their first impression of each other yet, but with this in mind and considering their personalities, makes sense that they needed to get close first, trust each other, and then develop feelings (SJM writes slow burns after all).

Cassian was sizing up Nesta, a gleam in his eyes that I could only interpret as a warrior finding himself faced with a new, interesting opponent.

“I can imagine,” Azriel said. Cassian flashed him a glare. But Azriel’s attention was on my sister, a polite, bland smile on his face. Her shoulders loosened a bit.

In their very first meet, the males were paying attention to each Archeron, but the way they were focusing on them is different. Look at the wording:

sizing up, warrior, opponent;

attention, polite smile;

While Cassian and Nesta "size each other up like opponents" and are loud/rough in terms of personality, Azriel and Elain are both quieter and acting like peacemakers. Here, please remember Feyre noticing how their personalities are similar:

Though she’d probably cling to Azriel, just to have some peace and quiet.

Basically while Cassian is always provoking Nesta, Azriel puts Elain at ease, because there's a difference of personality. It makes perfect sense that one of them is "enemies-to-lovers" and the other is "friends-to-lovers". Let's go back to the first scene:

“I can help her,” said Azriel, stepping to the table as Elain silently rose. No shadows at his ear, no darkness ringing his fingers as he extended a hand. Nesta monitored him like a hawk, but kept silent as Elain took his hand, and out they went. Cassian finished the muffin, licking his fingers. I could have sworn Nesta watched the entire thing with a sidelong glance. He grinned at her as if he knew it, too. “Ready for some flying, Nes?” “Don’t call me that.” The wrong thing to say, from the way Cassian’s eyes lit up.

Even though Cassian and Azriel's first instinct is the same (they go still), how they proceed is again different (Azriel extends his hand like a gentleman and Cassian is all cocky grins).

Cassian pressed one of his knives into Nesta’s hand. “Ash can kill you now,” he said with lethal quiet as she stared down at the blade. (...) “I told you to come to training,” Cassian said with a cocky grin, and strode off.

“This is Truth-Teller,” he told her softly. “I won’t be using it today—so I want you to.” (...) “It has never failed me once,” the shadowsinger said, the midday sun devoured by the dark blade. “Some people say it is magic and will always strike true.” He gently took her hand and pressed the hilt of the legendary blade into it. “It will serve you well.”

Just like Cassian, Azriel offered a blade to an Archeron sister so she could defend herself. Again, let's look at the wording:

Cassian pressed the one of his knives;

Azriel pressed the hilt of the legendary blade;

And again, Cassian: cocky, provokes Nesta; Azriel: softly, gently, puts Elain at ease. Of course, in the TT scene there's much more imagery (Light and Dark/ Death and the Fawn/ the fact that TT is not just one of Azriel's blades), but still both males have the same reaction when Nesta and Elain are about to face danger: they need to be able to defend themselves, so the males provide a blade.

From the shadows near the entrance to the tent, Azriel said, as if in answer to some unspoken debate, “I’m getting her back.” Nesta slid her gaze to the shadowsinger. Azriel’s hazel eyes glowed golden in the shadows. Nesta said, “Then you will die.” Azriel only repeated, glazing that stare, “I’m getting her back.”

They were speaking, Azriel with some urgency, but Cassian didn’t hear him, heard nothing but the roaring in his head before he said to no one in particular, “I’m going after them.”

They also have the same reaction when the sisters are in danger. As I said before: their first reaction is very similar or even the same in some cases. The major difference here is that we have Cassian's PoV and not Azriel's, but the similarities are so clear:

Unspoken debate = said to no one in particular

I'm getting her back = I'm going after them

Firstly it seems the males are lost in thoughts, so concern about the females, and then they declare they're going to rescue them.

“Do you know,” Cassian drawled to her, “that the last time I got into a brawl in this house, I was kicked out for a month?” Nesta’s burning gaze slid to him, still outraged—but hinted with incredulity.

“What did you see,” Azriel said, and I tried not to flinch as I found him at my other side, not having seen him move. Again. Elain paused halfway up the stairs. Slowly, she turned to look back at him.

It is also very interesting to notice how Cassian and Azriel are the ones that can intervene when the females are "experiencing" their powers. It's like Nesta and Elain use them as some kind of anchor - they both are "lost" in their powers, but can focus on Cassian and Azriel. If Cassian can help Nesta do a scrying, it's Azriel who listen and gets that Elain is a Seer.

Now one of my favorite parallels:

“Are you … happy?” Shadows darkened his hazel eyes. “I’m getting there.” A halfhearted answer. (Cassian, ACOFAS)

Shadows darkened his eyes, full of enough pain that she couldn’t stop herself from touching his shoulder. (Azriel, ACOSF)

Exact same wording. In ACOFAS, Cassian was struggling with his situation with Nesta, and in ACSF it's Azriel who is suffering because of his situation with Elain.

Speaking of ACOFAS, let me highlight this moment:

Nightmares about the moment when Cassian was near death and Nesta was sprawled over him, shielding him from that killing blow, and Elain—Elain—had taken up Azriel’s dagger and killed the King of Hybern instead.

I just find very interesting how the two biggest moments between the couples are brought up here. SJM could had just said Elain killed the king with TT, but she chose to associate that moment with Azriel (she does that very often). Anyway, moving on...

Amren drained her wine and said to Cassian, “Nesta has a week. One more week to find the Trove with her own methods. Then we seek out other routes.” She threw a nod toward Azriel. “Including Elain, who is more than capable of defending herself against the darkness of the Trove, if she chooses to. Don’t underestimate her.”

Cassian and Azriel looked to Rhys, who merely sipped from his own wine.

Here, we have the males reacting to the females getting involve with the Trove (Azriel stiffened/ Cassian growled); then Amren speaks with Cassian about Nesta, and with Azriel about Elain; then both males look to Rhysand

And of course (I'll be brief because there are lots of posts about these lines):

Stupid, stupid, stupid— He didn’t care. Didn’t give a shit as she rose up on her toes, her mouth nearing his—

It was so wrong. He didn't care. He needed to know what her skin tasted like (...) Rhys's voice thundered through him, halting him mere inches from Elain's sweet mouth.

In both bonus chapters, Cassian and Azriel "don't care" about the possible problems and struggles, all they care about is the female before them. Not only the wording is the same, but in both cases the couples almost kiss.

That's the formula right there.

(Her scent) It hit him in the gut so hard he could barely focus, and it took five centuries of training to make himself meet her eyes rather than let his own roll back into his head.

Her arousal drifted up to him and his eyes nearly roll back into his head at sweet scent.

Basically the way these two are affected by the Archeron sisters is practically the same in both bonus chapters. Speaking of that:

I assumed seeing Nesta went about as poorly as could be imagined, because my lesson the following morning was longer and harder than it’d been in previous days. I’d asked what, exactly, Nesta had said to him to get under his skin so easily. But Cassian had only snarled and told me to mind my own business, and that my family was full of bossy, know-it-all females.

Three days passed with no word from Cassian. He’d been replaced in training by a stone-faced Azriel, who was more aloof than usual and wouldn’t even give her a smile.

Cassian in the next morning was still affected by what happened in Wings & Embers, and Azriel - three days later - was still affected by what happened in his bonus chapter. Not only that: these are the only direct references to the bonus chapters in the actual books. The major difference here is that SJM wrote Elain as Azriel's secret, so only the readers that have access to the bonus chapter know why he couldn't even smile (very similar to "Cassian only snarled"). Naturally there's a difference of personality, too: Cassian snarling, totally pissed off/ Azriel more aloof, stone-faced.

It's very clear the direction SJM is going.

[cantillat-moved]

His friend always spoke about Cecily in such high regard that Shirou was under the impression she was a miracle worker. Even when Sonia had her bouts of fancy she had always been very disciplined and some of her rebellious inclinations were easy to foresee and carter to. The perchance for the occult, for example, or how much she enjoys horror movies. Only occasionally she would be a little more adventurous so Cecily certainly would be able to arrange or at least foresee a few contingency plans --- or so Emiya believed. If he was right on the money or if Sonia was overselling it was still up to debate.

❝ Ah, so it is the latter.  I understand, you intervening in your cousin’s hunt for fun could actually be detrimental to my chances of escaping unscratched ? Or perhaps you are like me and doesn’t know the basics of surviving that kind of party ? ❞ he teased. It was hard to imagine Sonia engaging in debauchery indulgence even if she might be surrounded by it due to the nature of her job as the crown princess. ❝ You know, the fact that you won’t compromise on your core values is one of the things that is most admirable about you. ❞ as someone who travels and deals with all sorts of powerful individuals, Shirou had witnessed many kinds of leaders. The more powerful they are they usually lean to use their influence to get what they want – more power, money, sex, drugs… Those who have it all like to play fast and loose with morals, accumulating all sorts of excess and discarding those who aren’t on their level without a second thought. He’d heard about Sonia’s mother���s lovers from rumors and hints from the princess herself, yet the queen’s perfectly curated image paints her as a saint. It was praiseworthy that Sonia wants to uphold her morals and remain hopeful in the process. ❝ I can tell people tend to think you are naïve, they think that not becoming jaded or petty like them means ignorant. Your kindness is both your greatest asset but also your weak spot. The people of Novoselic are fortunate to have such a wonderful ruler.  ❞ ---Still memories of a certain King of Knights made his heart feel tight.

❝ I think it might be a good idea to keep Novoselic relatively magic-free. ❞ he spoke frankly ❝ Political relationships are usually complicated enough, but mages can be downright inhumane. Some think as non-mages as little more than cattle, so a few selected ones you may be able to trust can inject some money in the country and offer support against mages with funny ideas. Luvia-san and her family can play their reputations of the “hyenas of Europe” but they are very caring and never go back with their word. ❞ he was actually a little surprised that the Church and its related branches like the Burial Agency barely have any dealings with Novoselic as well. ❝And I wasn’t talking about my own abilities as a mage, I was talking about people like you. You might be royal and a crown princess, but for most mages it is the same as nothing. Royal or homeless, if you don’t have magic circuits it makes barely any difference. During a ritual that took place in Fuyuki no-one paid any attention to me because at the time I didn’t have enough magic circuits to be considered a mage – just part of the peanut gallery. ❞ he revealed whilst dispelling her confusion ❝ This is one of the many reasons why you should be careful if you ever decide to allow the Mage’s Association to go back to Novoselic. Tohsaka and Luvia-san are exceptions, and there are a few individuals who won’t dismiss you . But you should be wary of mages, thankfully most of them chose to isolate themselves from regular humans unless it benefits them somehow. ❞ that was a harsh reality and kind of a dour conversation subject.

--  That was immediately brushed away by Sonia’s outburst, that caused Shirou to pause and blink before chuckling to the point of going “ow ow”  thanks to his stitches. Once he’d calmed down, he was able to articulate better: ❝ I’m always traveling around and I can’t keep my books. I end up giving them away or leaving them behind because I can’t store them. Knowing that a book that made me happy is in good hands will be perfect. ❞ he explained ❝ I know that a princess like you might not think too highly of second-hand articles but I promise you that I usually take good care of books. ❞ …A few of them had bullet holes tho. Those are usually discarded. ❝ A book is meant to be read after all. And to share a story with someone I know might enjoy it would be the best outcome, don’t you think ? But if you don’t want them, I understand. ❞

He watched as the girl struggled, it was indeed a little chilly and he was afraid that the blanket he was using might have been dirtied with his blood so it would also be no good. There was only one thing that he could do: ❝ Tʀᴀᴄᴇ ᴏɴ ! ❞ he hummed, mana pouring through his magic circuits activating it. In the past it would take a few seconds to retrieve the structure and picture it in his mind, now it was instantaneous : it was a dark burgundy windbreaker coat, it was warm enough despite not fitting her current aesthetic. It was also his size, he can’t create anything only reproduce things that he’d seen before. ❝ Use this, it will protect you from the draft. ❞ he indicated, holding it to her.

“I am sure she would appreciate that,” Sonia replied hesitantly. Cecily was the closest thing she had to an older sibling, and with her mother being…her mother, she often took both a personal and professional stake in Sonia’s care. Yes, she needed to ensure the Princess was well-dressed, well-informed, and on-time for every royal engagement, and oversee the various assistants who performed most of the errands for both Sonia and Cecily. But it wasn’t part of the job description to look after Sonia’s heart, and the many times it had fractured, much less shattered. She was as much the guide and planner to Sonia’s life as she was a sounding board, and a friendly ear when she had no one else to turn to. “But Cecily is not fond of surprises, even good ones. She rather enjoys predictability, so a planned visit might be best.”

Sure, he was injured and laying up in one of her many guest rooms at Boudry House, but Sonia couldn’t help but straighten and stare at him. Or rather, the prospect of needing Sonia to come and save him. Him, Shirou, the person who devoted his life to wandering the world in order to aid others. “I…I have no doubt of your ability to consent or decline such advances,” Sonia said, but that wasn’t truly her concern. Shirou’s agency in making his own choices had never been in question. What really mattered was would he want to? Not that his personal affairs were any of her concern. They were just friends. A friend who remembered her mishaps in abandoned homes, complete with her own dirt-caked clumsiness.

And one who didn’t hesitate to praise her, either. So often she was made uncomfortably disgusted by it, admirers who spoke so highly of her virtues without truly knowing her, or if she even possessed them. But this was different, Shirou was different, and Sonia found herself shifting in her chair as he spoke. “Thank you, but if I did become jaded, as you say, I do not think I would be able to serve Novoselic’s people effectively,” She replied. Even if he was right, she still felt awkward acknowledging her virtues. There was a certain amount of humility needed, she thought, in order for her not to become her mother. Or worse, her uncle. “In order to lead and provide hope, and a future worth living, one must care for the country and the people who call it home. My father…he taught me that.”

King Alexandre had also taught his daughter never to decline a good opportunity when it presented itself, that learning something new would ultimately benefit both Sonia and the monarchy. But Sonia wasn’t sure if that applied to a holiday, an intentional meeting with Shirou far away from Novoselic that, for once, was entirely planned and had nothing to do with either of their jobs. “I suppose it is not the most outlandish prospect, at least in ensuring there is time set aside in my schedule to go,” She pondered aloud, to her own surprise. Was she truly considering this? She had spent so much time setting personal affairs aside as much as possible: they ended poorly, either those close to her wanted nothing to do with royal life, or they jumped in head first for the worst reasons. “And of course, I would like to see Hilda. And the parfaits: they are quite good. I suppose I am a brave soul as well, then, as I needed to sample one: they use Novoselic chocolate, after all.”

Sonia tilted her head, confused, at Shirou’s admission of going to school with people like him. He fashioned himself as ordinary and yet the man in her guest room bed was the furthest thing from it. “You speak as if your own magecraft counts for nothing, Shirou, but it does,” She interjected, before she realized what she was truly saying. “It does to me, at least. I am sure your mage friends would agree. Yes, I would be pleased to meet any of your London associates you would like to introduce me to!” It was easier, she thought, than trying to introduce Shirou to England’s aristocrats, much less the British Royal Family. Hilda was the only person in that part of the world she was eager for him to meet, unless her sister did so first. If only due to the fact that she’d spoken of him so often to her friend in recent months that Sonia was sure she would want to actually meet the man who prompted her to question her heart as a teenager. And now, it seemed.

“Well, if we are to watch a film, then I should tuck in,” She decided, pushing her chair away from the table before getting to her feet. Sonia guessed that one of the wardrobes contained spare blankets, but she had no idea which one. In her own house, no less: everything about her life was organized by others, right down to spare blankets. “And I could not take your books from you!,” She interjected, looking over her shoulder to face him while she shoved various knick-knacks aside. “I can certainly request some copies to be ordered and delivered here, especially if your travels do not take you to where you’ve hidden them.”

The books were sorted, but she closed the wardrobe doors in defeat. “Shit, I thought there would be a spare blanket or two stored here,” She sighed, wrapping her arms around her waist. With a shake of her head, she fell back into the plush chair by his bed. “It is simply that these rooms are rather drafty if one is not suitably dressed or covered in blankets. I should go change into proper lounge clothes, though I am sure the staff will notice if I return here in what constitutes as pajamas.” Mainly, noticing that their princess would be implied to be sleeping with the injured patient she hadn’t hesitated to keep in the guest room.

[tsukikento]

Empathetic Chapter 17

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

Summary: After your mom, the number 1 hero in America, gets offered a teaching position at U.A., you two pack up your things and head to Musutafu, Japan to start a new life. Pressure for you in America was at an all-time high, and now you’re in Japan, where almost no one knows you, or your family’s past.

This tale starts on your first day of class where your new teacher decides the best way for you to fit in is to fight against the strongest person in your class: Bakugou Katsuki.

Warnings/Genre: This piece will feature some angst and reference to an abusive parent, if you are ever worried about other tw’s feel free to send me an ask and I will let you know. There will also be fluff, slight angst, pining, and slowburn.

A/N: Had to write this chapter three times because somehow everything kept getting deleted!! I’m sorry for my inconsistent posting. Please leave comments, reblog, or send me asks if you like! They always keep me motived :)

(masterlist)

When you came back out for dinner, Bakugou was already sitting at the head of the table, eating away, and chatting away with Kirishima and Sero. To his left was an empty seat, but a plate filled with food.

I wonder if Bakugou made that or if someone nicer prepared it, you wonder as you and Ashido made your way to the table. If Bakugou made it, then damn. However, you wouldn’t be surprised if Kirishima made it or Kaminari who was on dish cleaning duty and needed to put away the leftovers. Regardless of who did it, they still sat you down next to Bakugou in your usual seat.

Don’t read into that, you told yourself as your sat down at the table. Instead, you focused on the delicious food in front of you that you immediately began to chow down on. You found yourself, much like Bakugou, simply eating away while Ashido, Kirishima, and Sero kept the conversation going. Both of you were much too hungry to stop and add your own commentary to the conversation.

Bakugou finished before you and chugged down his water before taking both yours and his glass to the kitchen to fill them back up. Gratefully, you mumbled out a “Thank you” before you continued to eat. Play it cool, he’s just being polite, you told yourself and Ashido proceeded to elbow you and wink.

You rolled your eyes at the pink girl and focused back on what was left on your plate.

Conversation flowed easily until Bakugou came back. The blond placed the cups onto the table before holding up his arms and stretching in a way that clearly showed his stomach. At this point, each of you were still in casual athletic clothes and his simple t-shirt lifted just enough to show his stomach.

It was an action you should be used the at this point. The blond often stretched without a care or used his quirk in ways that ruined clothing. And yet, you still found your face heating up and your eyes glued to the sight.

When he finally sat back down, he leaned in close to you. “I’m ready to go whenever,” He explained before leaning back into his chair and sipping on his water.

“Go where?” Sero, who was to Bakugou’s immediate right, questioned.

You looked to Bakugou, expecting him to reply. Not only were you hesitant to explain the situation and possibly misunderstand what Bakugou was thinking, but the blond typically made habit of answering anyways.

“The gym for yoga and cardio,” Bakugou explained, just like you expected. Luckily, it wasn’t any different than what you thought.

“Really?” Kirishima questioned, his eyes lighting up. “That sounds so manly!” He turned to look at Ashido, “Do you want to go do yoga and cardio too?”

“Um,” Ashido immediately turned to you, concerned that she and Kirishima would be intervening on your alone time with Bakugou.

Part of you wanted to welcome the company, ultimately nervous about having to hold up a conversation when neither you nor Bakugou were all too talkative. However, you spent hours alone with Bakugou each week and it wasn’t awkward then so why would it be different?

Bakugou also hates how couple-y they are so he may be more inclined to talk to me and spend time with me if they are there doing PDA, you thought before subtly nodding to Ashido.

“I’d love to go if Bakugou and Y/L/N don’t mind,” Ashido finally spoke after a few moments.

“I don’t care,” Bakugou measly replied.

“What about you, Sero?” Kirishima questioned, “Do you want to go too?”

“No way,” The black-haired boy replied, leaning back in his chair. “I had interning today and had to chase a villain down seven blocks, ugh!”

“Weren’t you using your tape though?” Ashido shot back curiously.

“So? It still drains me and my poor arms. I could not do yoga like this.” Sero flailed his arms around before letting them fall to his sides, effectively showing how absolutely dead they were. “I’ll just stay here with Kaminari and make him watch the new season of Galactic Guard again or whatever.”

“Your loss,” Kirishima jokes before chuckling lightly. “I’m going to go get changed, be down soon.”

Ashido followed him with the same explanation.

Awkwardly, you looked at Sero, expecting him to say something. You and Bakugou were already changed and had your waters with you, there was no reason for you to go upstairs. Unfortunately, due to the silence and the awkward atmosphere of a nervous you and an ever-rigid Bakugou, the black-haired boy immediately slid out of his seat, claiming to need water. However, you watched as he dropped his empty glass on the counter and simply talked to Kaminari.

You rolled your eyes and took a sip of your water, wishing there was more to do. Thinking on your feet, you stood up abruptly. “I’ll clear the dishes,” You said before stacking the plates and silverware. “Do you want your water anymore?”

Bakugou shook his head so you proceeded to grab his water, place it into your cup, and make your way to the kitchen slowly.

Kaminari and Sero greeted you happily and Kaminari immediately took your dishes.

Their rather boring conversation did not leave room for you to interject, so you simply made your way back to the dining table. Sighing, you grabbed your half-full water and reached for Bakugou’s as well. The blond watched you wordlessly.

You wondered if his lack of comment was a bad thing or if it showed comfortability and a willingness to let you touch his belongings.

As you debated the notion, you silently, almost like you were on autopilot, filled up the waters, and went back to the table. With nothing left to do, you sat back down into your seat and awaited the arrival of Kirishima and Ashido

“Thank you,” Bakugou said as you sat down with the two glasses of water.

“No problem” You replied. Despite this comment being typical for literally anyone to say, it still felt nice for him to say thank you. Maybe it was because he rarely used his manners.

Bakugou grabbed his water from the table and put it back into his bag. The two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you waited for Ashido and Kirishima. The only noise was the people talking in the kitchen and the small group watching television in the living room.

A few minutes passed by before the couple finally emerged from the elevator and greeted you both with wide smiles. Kirishima had on black basketball shorts with a red stripe down the side as well as a red hoodie. Ashido adorned a matching two-piece set of leggings and a conservative sports bra that was cheetah print. She also had on a black zip-up jacket that was currently wrapped around her waist.

You and Bakugou quickly got up from your seats, grabbed your belongings, and slowly made your way to the door. Ashido was by your side while Kirishima ran the kitchen to fill up his and Ashido’s waters. The pink girl moved from being attached to Kirishima’s side and was now attached to yours.

Giggling, she whispered in your ear, “Yet another double date!”

Sheepishly you rolled your eyes and dismissed the thought. “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”

“What?” Ashido questioned, moving away from you to give you a confused look.

“What do you mean ‘what’?” You shot back.

“I mean,” She began, emphasizing her words, “What does that even mean?”

“What does what mean?” You replied, absolutely clueless to the confusion.

“She’s asking what ‘don’t count your chickens before they hatch’ means,” Bakugou butted in as he stood opposite you by the front door. “Personally, I think it’s rather obvious.”

“Oh, shut it, Bakugou!” Ashido exclaimed, giving the blond a dirty look.

Laughing, you explained, “It’s just an American saying.” You debated how exactly to explain it before once again continuing, “Just because you have, say, 10 chicken eggs, 2 could break before they hatch and 3 more could be simply eggs, no baby in them. So, they saying means that you shouldn’t expect something until it happens. You can’t expect to have 10 chickens just because you have 10 eggs.”

Ashido harrumphed, clearing having trouble understanding. “Sounds dumb.” Something you also expected her to say considering she was the one ‘counting her chickens before they hatched’.

You shrugged, “It’s hard to understand sayings from other countries if you didn’t grow up around them. I’m sure some common Japanese sayings don’t make sense to me.”

At this point, Kirishima joined back in and made quick work of putting on his tennis shoes.

“My mom used to always say ‘even monkeys fall out of trees’ when I made mistakes,” Ashido explained, testing you to see if you would understand a common Japanese phrase.

“Everyone makes mistakes,” You replied after a few seconds to think it over.

“Dang!” Ashido replied as the four of you made your way out of the dorm and to the gym.

“What about this one,” Bakugou interjected. “My dad would say this all the time, ‘the stake that sticks up gets hammered down.’”

Oh, this one is definitely more complicated.

You tried working through the saying out in your brain, sure it had someone to do with being seen in society. “Um,” You began, “The person who stands out will…” You paused, unsure how to finish. Sighing, you shrugged your shoulders, “I don’t know.”

“Ha Ha!” Ashido shouted in joy. “It means the person who stands out is often subject to criticism.”

You nodded your head in understanding as she explained.

“How were you so good at those?” Kirishima asked.

“Well, word association is taught in elementary schools,” You explained, reminiscing on the problems you solved in second grade. “For example, we would get something like “cow is to barn as man is to ‘blank’ and we would have to fill it in.”

Ashido and Kirishima proceeded to exclaim “house!” while Bakugou simply nodded, actions that represented each of them rather well.

“Nice!” You laughed, high-fiving the two who guessed.

You rounded the corner at this point, entering one of the school buildings with multiple classrooms. You followed the group as they made their way upstairs and weaved through hallways. Fairly naturally, the conversation died down as the couple of Ashido and Kirishima clung to each other and dawdled behind.

Aggravated, Bakugou led your group, clearly annoyed with how slow they were. Honestly, you were pretty sure Ashido planned this so you could have alone time with the blond.

Trying to utilize this opportunity, you kept stride with the blond. “Pretty annoying, huh?” You asked, gesturing to the couple and silently apologizing for throwing them under the bus and using them as a conversation starter.

“Aren’t they always?” Bakugou replied, looking to the couple before rolling his eyes and groaning.

“Sometimes they are cute,” You shrugged, flashing a smile to the blond. “At least they’re happy, you know?” You asked, attempting to reason with them.

Bakugou simply “tsked” in reply. “Doesn’t mean they aren’t making me nauseous.”

“Very true,” You responded, unable to stop yourself from chuckling loudly. “Especially when they talk in baby voices and make little smooching noises!” You altered your voice slightly to mimic Ashido’s baby voice that you hear her only use with Kirishima.

Bakugou cackled loudly at the comment, clearly amused by your impersonation. “Or when they go off to each lunch by themselves, cuddling under a tree, and then coming back like giddy teenagers,” He added.

“Oh, yeah!” You animatedly exclaimed, “How could I forget? Kirishima ends up staring out the window all of class!”

As your laughter died down, the two of you arrived at the double doors that led to the small gym. Luckily, no one else was inside due to how late it was. In fact, you four might be here past curfew. Despite this, you entered into the gym which had a few different weight machines and treadmills as well as a room to the left that was dim and specifically designed for yoga.

You knew this was the gym that Ashido frequently used late at night but weren’t familiar with the layout. Slowly, you put down your belongings, chugged down a few gulps of your water and made your way into the yoga room. The room had too large baskets on wheels that came up to about your waist. Inside, were blue and white yoga mats with the school’s logo on it. It was for student use and cleaned every week, a small perk for going to such a prestigious hero school. By the time you grabbed a mat, you heard the large metal and glass doors once again opening. Waiting for the couple, you rolled out your mat and brought your water to your side.

Although you did yoga frequently and could easily start your own routine, you figured the four of you would want to do a routine together. Once inside, Kirishima and Ashido quickly came into the yoga room and set up mats.

“I’ll hook up my phone to the projector so we can play a video,” Ashido explained as she plugged her phone into a wire that connected to the projector.

You watched the pink girl search up a yoga routine that was primarily focused on stretching the body pre-workout. The video was about half an hour-long, so you simply prepared yourself by sitting on your knees and waiting for the introduction to finish.

Yoga went by rather quickly, which each of you silently following the video. You were all in your own worlds, thinking about your own problems or simply letting your mind go black as you followed the routine. You could tell it was something your mind and body was craving after a long day of theorizing and sitting at the desk.

Once the routine finally ended, you let out a big breath and stretched your body one final time before grabbing your water bottle to drink from. “Ah, that was so good!” You sighed, completely satisfied.

Kirishima and Ashido hummed in agreement as they rolled up their mats.

“And now it’s time to put that stretching to good use,” Bakugou added, as he passed by you with his own rolled mat. He grabbed yours, which you just finished rolling, and went to put them away. Once done, he made his way back to you and held out his hand to help you up. “Shall we go run?” He asked while he effortlessly pulled you up.

“We shall,” You replied, a wide smile on your face.

Bakugou had never, not even when he was kicking your ass in training, helped your up or touched your hand. Immediately, you felt heat spreading up your face and your heart beating faster.

Ashido, who was putting her own yoga mat into her bag eyed you suspiciously. Subtly, you gave her a surprised look and shrugged your shoulders. Bakugou inevitably let go of your hand after you were standing up straight. He was surprisingly warm and you held quickly went cold without his touching.

In an attempt to play everything off cool, you simply followed behind him, grabbing your bag and moving to the treadmill next to his. You placed your belongings down, took one last gulp of water, and got onto your treadmill.

Bakugou, who had already started, was going at a slow pace and you decided to follow in line with him. The slow speed was an ideal way to warm up your body and prepare you for a faster pace.

You didn’t have to wait long, however, because Bakugou soon sped up his treadmill by two. He gave you’re a clear look and you didn’t even have to take out your earbuds to know he was subtly saying there is no way in hell you will run faster than me.

After a few more strides, you also increased your speed, clicking three times to be running one faster than him.

Almost immediately, Bakugou gave you another look and increased his speed. This game of tug-of-war continued for a few minutes, each of you slowly increasing your speed in order to one-up the other. It was fun when you started slow, and you even found yourself smiling when you were running at a speed just below a sprint. However, you were now sprinting at a breakneck pace and craving this game to stop.

You once again, and quite stubbornly, pressed the up arrow to increase your speed.

Bakugou attempted to groan under his breath, but he was going too fast to have control over his voice and you clearly heard the roan of indignation. The blond pressed his finger onto the up arrow and increased his speed just as he had done before. This time, however, he notably did not go past your speed.

The both of you were now running at the same speed, and although you were tempted to go up at least one more to irk Bakugou, you knew it was best not to. It was all down to endurance now.

You focused your attention on running, moving your arms to help your speed, and focusing on your breathing to make sure you were taking in big and consistent breaths.

“Woah, Bakugou and Y/N-chan!” Kirishima’s voice rang through your ears. Despite only being two treadmills over and a total of 12 feet, you could barely hear him. “So manly!” If you were looking at him, you would see him send a cheeky smile to Ashido before increasing his own speed.

However, you were all too involved in your own competition to worry about him.

You felt your legs burn and crave for a break. You felt so hot that you were sure you were steaming. In fact, you saw steam.

Steam? You looked to your left from where it was coming and saw steam emitting from Bakugou’s palms. You could have gasped in surprise if you weren’t so already short on breath. The next thing to smelled was an intense caramel. Or is it burning sugar? You questioned as you realized it was coming from the blond next to you.

It smells so sweet, you thought, clearly distracted. It made you think of caramel apples at amusement parks, chewing on the delectable treat as you walked around, surrounded by vibrant lights.

You inhaled deeply, trying to take it all in. Suddenly, you tripped. The floor fell out from under you, and you did not have enough speed or traction to keep up. Quickly, you clutched onto the railings and got back up to speed. The difficult action, which would surely leave bruises on your arms, lasted only a few seconds. Although Bakugou noticed, he didn’t say anything, so you simply kept up with running.

However, now your body ached even more. All you wanted to do was stop and you couldn’t drag your brain away from the idea. You felt your limbs begging to slow down and you could no longer deny the request. Reluctantly, you slowed down the treadmill with a sigh. Bakugou immediately noticed the action and shot his arms up with a small “woop!” in excitement.

At least seeing him so excited was worth it, you thought as you finally stopped the treadmill.

With exhaustion running through your veins, you got off the treadmill and made a beeline to your water. Your legs gave out and you sat against the wall, arching your back to give your lungs room. You chugged a few gulps of the cool beverage before you brought your hands above your head. It was the best way to get air into your lungs and control your breathing again.

Bakugou quickly joined you, copying your actions but while standing up.

“Good job, guys!” Ashido exclaimed, giving you both a thumbs up as she jogged at a much more reasonable pace.

You returned the gesture before grabbing your water again. Slumped up against the wall, you closed your eyes. Mentally, you made a note to not go out running tomorrow.

While you rested, you heard Ashido and Kirishima turn off their treadmills and join you against the wall. They chatted amongst themselves while Bakugou sat next to you.

Immediately, the caramel smell emitting off him wafted into your noise and filled your senses with euphoria and anxiety. He smelled so good, and yet you were certain he was much closer to you now. You could practically feel his body heat against your left arm.

The chatter from Ashido and Kirishima provided white noise, while Bakugou’s sweet aroma and warm body provided the ultimate guide to sleep. Your tired body craved it and you slowly felt yourself falling deeper and deeper.

Too tired to notice, you slowly leaned to the left, your shoulder eventually touching Bakugou’s. It was slight, a small brush of skin, but the blond immediately noticed the action, who stared at your sleeping body which found comfort in the purchase of his body.

You weren’t sure how much time passed when you were woken back up. In fact, you didn’t realize you fell asleep until you were waking up and opening your eyes to the sight of Bakugou’s own crimson orbs.

Quickly, you noticed the feeling of a warm arm against yours and moved abruptly away.

You could feel the heat spread from your neck to your cheeks and ears. If you weren’t in such shock, you would have also been certain that Bakugou’s own cheeks blushed pink. You shook your head in confusion, pushing away the ridiculous thoughts that came to mind.

“S-sorry!” You stuttered out, your voice barely emitting a sound.

“It’s fine,” Bakugou confidently laughed, brushing off the topic. “I just thought you would want to head back soon since you are falling asleep.”

“Uh, yeah,” You mumbled, “Thanks.” Looking away, you set your eyes on all your belongings and began picking them up. Sometimes it was difficult to look him in the eyes. Despite how warm and entrancing they were, they made you feel hot all over and spread nerves all throughout your body. You swallowed the lump in your throat as you stood all the way up and awaited Bakugou.

It only took a moment for the blond to stand upright after you. Gingerly smiling, you turned and made your way to the door.

“You guys coming?” Bakugou asked, walking backward so he could face the couple.

“Later,” Ashido mumbled, waving him away as she continued to smile at her boyfriend.

Bakugou hummed in acknowledgment and turned to you, a signal to open the door into the empty hallway.

“Today was fun,” You remarked, sparing a glance at the blond as the metal door eased closed. “Although I am sure tomorrow will be tough.” You paused, thinking over your schedule, “At least I only have class tomorrow.”

Although you were too nervous to look long, you saw the blond smile shyly and nod his head. “Yeah, I’m just glad I am done with the assignment due in English tomorrow.”

“Ah,” You replied, “How I wish I only had English assignments instead of extra Japanese assignments.”

“You’ll need to learn if you plan to stay here,” Bakugou remarked.

You scoffed, “I would argue that my Japanese was quite good already.” Rolling your eyes, you spared a teasing smile to him.

“What about when you are given a paper report and expected to read it all in minutes? Or when you have to write a report after a mission?” Bakugou shot back.

You groaned loudly, simply imagining how torturous a kanji-filled report that you would need to run through quickly. “Maybe you’ll be nice enough to write my reports for me?” You joked, opening your eyes and pouting in an attempt to look cute.

Bakugou blew air out his nose in a short laugh. “Bold of you to assume that I would even hire you to work at my agency.”

“Rude,” You replied, knowing full well that this was all a joke. “I think I would be a good hire, I could keep you calm during idiotic interviews or meetings too.” You looked into his eyes, “So, you want to start your own agency?”

“Need to if I’m going to be number one,” Bakugou curtly answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Well,” You began, “If I’m still in the area, and you are in desperate need of a hire, I would be happy to help.”

“Thanks.”

A small laugh and a brief look had your insides twisting. You once again felt hot. However, you were now, luckily, in the cool air of the night. You calmed yourself as the two of you approached the dorms.

Bakugou took a few quick steps to get ahead of you to reach the door. He moved to the side so you could enter in first and you smiled and nodded politely.

However, when you entered the dorm, your mood quickly changed. Practically every student was in the living room, some standing, some sitting. Most notably, Aizawa-sensei stood in the dining room, leaned up against the large wooden table, and clearly lost in his thoughts. Multiple sets of eyes turned to look at you. Your anxieties pooled in your stomach as you looked at your teacher.

Is it that bad that we are past curfew?

You felt Bakugou’s body pressed close up against yours. You were too scared to move, so the blond had to squeeze in. He was about to jokingly push you out of the way until he noticed the concerning scene in front of him.

You had no time to think about how comforting the action was, especially as he placed your hands onto your shoulders. He squeezed the slightly, but you were unsure if it was an action that was supposed to make you feel better or to make your move. You stumbled forward, but the blond hardly moved.

Aizawa cleared his throat and moved from his perch at the table. Silently, he approached you. “Let’s talk outside,” He whispered so only Bakugou, and you could hear. “Just you,” He elaborated, looking into your eyes.

You gulped and let Bakugou push you away so Aizawa could reach the door and lead the way out. You only snapped back to reality when your shoulders were suddenly cold at the lost touch.

“Okay,” You mumbled, stumbling to follow after your teacher. Maybe he was going to lecture us separately? You wondered, clinging to the hope that this was a simple scolding and not a disastrous event.

It must be my mom, what else would it be?

“Is my mom okay?” You immediately questioned when the door Bakugou closed was finally shut.

“Yes,” He abruptly replied, “Let’s talk this way.” He led you around the building to where there were multiple benches.

“My siblings?”

“Sit,” He spoke and motioned at a long bench.

You sat quickly, hoping it would make the news come quicker as well.

“There is no easy way to say this,” He began, “Please just listen.” Aizawa rubbed his eyes, clearly drained. “There was a prison escape at the North-Western prison. A total of 117 inmates escaped and are being rounded up. Your father is one of them.”

[scorpionatori]

Forbidden Book of Friends Reveal: Anime vs. Manga

I don’t know what decision making goes into the ordering of anime episodes when adapting them from the manga, but it’s a shame the scene of Natori telling Natsume about forbidden exorcists techniques was moved around when it was one of the biggest revelations in the series. The anime moving the scene from the arc with Takuma and his shiki to the arc with Matoba’s letter worked, but it took a lot of impact out for Natsume and Natori and the audience. Let’s compare these two arcs and the topics and story elements they deal with:

Matoba’s letter (ch52-54):

Matoba sends Natsume a lengthy letter that he never opens, and ends up finding him and blackmailing him into helping solve a dilemma for his clan. Earlier Natsume had lost the letter at Natori’s apartment after asking for his help resealing a youkai. Natsume finds out more about exorcist drama and politics with Matoba’s clan. He also learns that Natori is regularly being threatened with curses and that the lizard not going to his left leg may mean he’ll lose it one day. Natori finds the letter Matoba sent to Natsume and sees that he is getting further pulled into the world of exorcism, and he destroys the letter. The main topics this arc deals with are:

Exorcist clan politics and history, Natori being targeted by colleagues, exorcists colluding to sabotage the Matoba clan

Natsume becomes increasingly worried about Natori’s safety due to his colleagues trying to hurt him and the unsettling implications of the lizard avoiding his left leg.

Natori becomes increasingly worried about Natsume’s safety and involvement with exorcists and tries to intervene secretly.

Takuma and his shiki: (ch60-62):

Natsume finds one of Natori’s paper dolls damaged by rain after watching one of his movies at a downtown cinema. He worries he’s in trouble and heads to the address on the doll where he ends up finding out Tsukiko had hired Natori to investigate something for her. They ultimately find out two of Takuma’s shiki thought they were abandoned by him after he lost his sight, and Tsukiko had put up barriers out of worry, which kept them trapped outside. Natori accidentally overhears about the book of friends from the other shiki, Ginro, who mentions Natsume having something dangerous on him that exorcists shouldn’t even have. Later, Natsume finds out that Taki’s circles and the book of friends are forbidden by exorcists because they’re considered cruel and dangerous. Natsume performs the ritual of release for the shiki. After he and Natori say goodbye to each other, Natori tells Urihime to find out what dangerous item Natsume has been hiding. The topics in this arc are:

Human and youkai relationships, complications from them making contracts with each other, humans losing their ability to see youkai, therefore leaving behind the ones who cared for them.

Humans who can’t see youkai feeling helpless to protect those who do.

Exorcists have rules about what kind of spells and contracts are allowed, and Taki’s circle and Reiko’s book of friends are both forbidden objects.

Continued from the Matoba’s letter arc, Natsume and Natori are both becoming more and more worried about each other’s wellbeing.

Natsume’s ongoing dilemma about wanting to tell Natori about the book of friends but not knowing if he should.

The topic of forbidden techniques does work somewhat in the Matoba letter arc, as it fits in with exorcist politics. However, the arc did NOT deal with what was most important about the revelation: the book of friends.

The book of friends was not a topic in the letter arc. The arc mainly focused on the turmoil in the exorcist community and the history of the clans, Matoba’s desire to acquire Natsume as a powerful ally for his clan, Natsume’s increasing concern for Natori’s wellbeing, and Natori’s increasing anxiety around Natsume getting sucked into the world of exorcism, and his overprotectiveness and attempts at intervening in secret.

There was no room in here to fit in the book of friends revelation in a way that was actually impactful. Natsume didn’t have time to reflect on finding out his grandma’s book is considered too cruel to exist, he was too busy having to help solve a massive problem for Matoba at a large exorcist gathering. Natori knew nothing about Natsume carrying something forbidden at this point and barely noticed his concern. And besides, he was also too busy worrying about Natsume receiving letters from Matoba. The very important revelation about the titular item of the series becomes a fleeting anecdote that isn’t touched on or important for the rest of the arc, and therefore diminishes its impact.

The Takuma arc, on the other hand, was perfect for this revelation. The main plot of the arc revolves around the messy complications of contracts between humans and youkai. Natsume spent a lot of time thinking on his desire vs hesitation of telling Natori about the book, only for Natori to accidentally overhear about it. And shortly after that, Natsume innocently asks if there’s spells that allow humans without sight to see youkai (thinking of Taki’s spell) and immediately learns that that sort of thing is forbidden. Then he hears that the exact sort of contracts that are in the book of friends are also forbidden and considered cruel.

There was way more tension here with this scene happening shortly after Ginro mentions the book when Natori walks in. Natsume knows he caught at least part of the conversation, and Natori now knows Natsume has something dangerous on him called the “book of friends”. He doesn’t know what it is at first, but later when he sees Natsume’s reaction to hearing about forbidden contracts, it becomes pretty obvious what kind of thing the book is. This also causes Natori to become very concerned.

Natori was definitely able to connect the dots between what he heard earlier and Natsume’s face when he finds out about forbidden contracts, which gives him more clear motivation to find out what it is as well. In the anime, all he knows is that Natsume has something called the “book of friends” that is the kind of thing exorcists aren’t supposed to have. In the manga, he hears this and then afterwards sees how scared and worried Natsume is when he hears about forbidden contracts for the first time. It’s safe to assume at this point that something that was titled “the book of friends” is probably a book of forbidden contracts with youkai. This makes the reason behind Natsume’s constant involvement with youkai even more apparent. Not only is he in possession of something outlawed by exorcists (when he was recently dragged into a big dilemma by the leader of the community), if he’s in possession of a large collection of youkai contracts who are bound with their real names, this explains why they go after him so much and why he can not keep a distance from them. Natori knows for sure now that Natsume has a massive target painted on his back for both exorcists and youkai, beyond just his strong spiritual power. He knows full well what his colleagues and Matoba are like, and how dangerous youkai can be. This gives him a much stronger motivation for gathering info on the book of friends when he has a pretty good idea of what it is, as opposed to in the anime when he only had a very vague idea. Even if it was wrong to search for info on it without Natsume’s knowledge anyway, Natori’s fear of the book of friends and urgency in finding out what it is is more understandable in the manga, whereas with how it was framed in the anime, people probably found it easier to read him as suspicious and sneaky more than very genuinely concerned about Natsume’s safety with such a thing.

Again, I don’t know what all goes into the ordering of episodes in anime adaptations, and it doesn’t matter as much in an episodic series such as Natsume Yuujinchou, but there’s still definitely important things that can get altered or left out or taken out of a better context when the order is changed from the manga. Natsume finding out his grandmother’s book is forbidden was a very important reveal for a lot of reasons. It’s very difficult for him to learn that the item he already had a lot of complicated feelings on is considered cruel even by exorcists. This increases his feelings of guilt for having such an item and his love for his grandmother vs his fear that she was a bad person for binding so many youkai (in general this was not touched on enough in the anime, but I could write a whole other essay about that). He’s also been debating whether or not to tell Natori about the book of friends since they first met, only for him to find out on accident. And then shortly after he learns from him that it is forbidden in the exorcist community to bind youkai with their real names when making contracts. Overall, while they made it work with the changes, it wasn’t as impactful for the characters or the audience to move that scene from its original context.

[dracosathenaeum]

Great Love Story | Final Part | DM

#A/N: Apologies for the long wait, with what went down the other night and overall writers block this took far longer than I expected. I hope this is a satisfying ending for everyone who’s been reading so far!! Let me know what you thought of it overall!! Also this chapter is dedicated to @slytherinwh0re and Voldemort’s feet :3

Warnings: swearing, violence, food, mentions of strangling and sex

Word Count: 2,781

PART 1 | PART 2

Waking up alone in that empty bed had perhaps been worse than when Draco had broken up with you. You had left his room that time thinking he had left you because he had lost all feelings for you. This time, he had left even though you knew of his true feelings, feelings that he couldn’t hide. Jealousy was never easy to hide for Draco, but luckily for you it just showed that he still cared for you.

You had spent days after he had left you with nothing but second thoughts in your head, debating with yourself whether or not he was worth it. You could’ve walked away and let that last night be a mistake, leave it to be the final moment of closure between the two of you (if you could even call it closure).

But no, learning from mistakes apparently wasn’t an option for you.

You just wanted the truth, was what you told yourself as you wrapped a green tie around your neck; not revenge, just the truth.

“Remember all you have to do is walk past Draco and smile at me from across the hall a couple times. He’ll be able to connect the dots from that alone.”

The older Slytherin looked at you with a smirk on his face, “If I knew all I had to do was swap ties with you and walk past Malfoy to have someone do my potions essay for me I would’ve offered my services years ago.”  You had been lucky enough to have found (bribed) someone to help you pull the truth from Draco, even if you weren’t too fond of the person himself. You were up for playing the long game though you doubted Draco could resist interfering before long.

You ran your fingers through his soft locks, ruffling them up a little before unbuttoning both of your top buttons to make it seem more realistic. “You know, if you wanted to make it authentic, we could just actually get with each other? I wouldn’t mind rubbing it in Malfoys face that I got with his girl.”

Retracting your hands from his shirt, you grimaced, “This is enough, thank you Adrian.” You were only being polite since he was helping you out; the second you no longer needed him you would make sure he knew you’d never be interested in him.

“Come on, before they all finish eating before we’ve even gone in.” You walked into great hall, head held high and hand gripped in a clammy hold. As much you had hated how Draco’s hands had always been cold, you suddenly found yourself missing them greatly.

You let go of his hand and the both of you walked your separate directions but that was all you needed. You sat down with your friends and watched as Theo pointed out your tie and then the person who had yours. You didn’t even both keeping your gaze on their table for Draco’s reaction, something would come sooner or later.

“y/n, uh, are you sure this is a good idea? I know if sucks, but he’s clearly moved on, I don’t think making him jealous will work when he looks at Pansy like that.”

He hadn’t told you he loved you the other night, nor had he let you say it, but his love language was never with words. The way he held you, the careful touches and well-placed kisses, those were what made you believe there was still hope, and if not, at least an actual explanation rather than fucking you into the oblivion only to leave you before the sun was awake.

You knew he loved you still, but perhaps there were now two in his heart. Your eyes wondered back to the Slytherin table, expecting him to be glaring holes into the side of your head or arguing with the boy who had your tie around his neck, but no. He had his eyes trained on Pansy’s eyes, his fingers playing with a strand of her perfect hair. Grace was right, you had no chance when he was looking at Pansy with stars in his eyes. Though perhaps that was your answer itself. Your plan had been perfect, you had just executed it around the wrong people.

//

He had fucked up once, he wasn’t about to do so again; not when the stakes were so high. His one moment of jealousy causing him to lose control had only furthered his resolve to not do so again. It simply wasn’t worth the risk.

He would only take partial blame though, his twit of a partner clearly wasn’t as sneaky as she had claimed to be, one slip up each was already more than allowed and although they both knew, it seemed only Draco was taking it seriously.

Talking to Pansy had been less than helpful, “She could’ve joined in.” being her only response, her red painted lips curling into a smile that made something in his stomach tighten. Perhaps he was the fool to expect more from her.

Her shortcomings and the disappointment he felt of his own lack of self-control had perhaps been the only thing to stop him from punching the shit eating grin off the rat who you had decided to use to pull a reaction from him.

He had been with you just three nights ago and he knew you, knew you inside and out. The hickeys on your neck were his marks and all 3 of you knew that; swapping ties with some poor sucker and ruffling his hair wasn’t going break him. Not by a long shot.

It had taken him everything that night outside the room of requirement to not push you in and take you until you remembered you could only feel that way for him, yet he had managed to spit out the word whore and swallow the instant regret, grimacing at the memory of your palm striking his face.

He had done all that to have his weak heart ruin it when he found you with Theo.

He had almost ruined everything.

But yet again his weak, traitorous heart failed him when he found himself with his fist across someone’s face.

//

You had kept your eyes trained on the food in front of you to prevent the temptation of causing yourself any more pain, instead working your brain on how best to get Draco alone and on how best to procure some veritaserum (was that even legal?).

Throwing back the last of your pumpkin juice, you gave a quick goodbye to your friends before you all but ran to the library in attempts to look for some answers. Well you had tried getting to the library; you had been barely halfway through the great hall when Adrian had seemingly appeared from thin air, his hand on your upper arm pulling you to a stop.

“So when do I get my compensation for this favour?”

You didn’t know what it was, but the way he looked and spoke to you had the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. He had leant in, warm puffs of air blowing across your ear as he spoke to you. Not the kind that had you melting in Draco’s arm, but the kind that had you wanting to turn and run, but his bruising hold on your arm wasn’t about to let that happen.

“The Slytherin prince looks like he’s about to murder me, I think I deserve more than an essay. Let me fuck you and we’ll call it even.”

The joy in your chest from hearing that your plan had worked was quickly replaced with the most revoting feeling, you physically gagged and wondered why no one intervened as you had physically recoiled from him. Draco may not have been many people’s first picks, you wouldn’t try to hide his faults, but he at least had some respect and dignity.

Your mouth fell open, not sure if you should slap him across the face or swear at him until he got the point.

“The audacity-”

“If I ever see you within 100 meters of her again, I’ll make sure you’ll never be able to fuck again.” Yet again another Slytherin has seemingly appeared from thin air, cutting off you off before you could even say what you wanted to say. Adrian had been smart enough to let go of you the second he had heard Draco’s voice, but it didn’t make up for the fact he had been stupid enough to act.

You strode out the doors of the great hall as soon as you remembered how to use your legs, catching Draco’s his fist connecting with Adrian’s face out of the corner of your eye; the sickening crack of the collision was enough to bring a smile back on your face. That and the fact Draco had yet again shown his true colours, now you just needed to know why he was hell bent on hiding them and hurting you both.

You hadn’t realised how lost in your own thoughts you had been in until you found yourself in the courtyard with a blonde Ravenclaw waving happily at you.

“Hi y/n! Isn’t it beautiful out today? I wanted to take Pansy on a picnic, but you understand why that’s not quite possible yet.” You hadn’t expected to run into Luna so soon, though you avoiding her out of sheer embarrassment had definitely been a major factor of that.

“You’re okay being the ‘other woman’? Luna you deserve so much more than that.” The two of you weren’t particularly close (other than when you had seen her being sent to heaven by Pansy’s fingers), but she felt an obligation like any other person might’ve.

“Other woman? I thought Pansy said you two had made up again? They're just faking it for you-know-who. I guess Draco had to be stricter since he has his secret task, but it’s odd he’s taking so long to tell you.”

You blinked. You remembered how to breathe again and then the anger came.

“I have to go but thank you Luna, I owe you.” You didn’t have time to come up with a speech or a plan, you would just find him and do whatever your impulses led to.

You were going to make him repent for every second lost, for every ounce of heart ache you felt and then you’d have him beg for you, if you managed to not strangle him first that was.

You ended up pounding on the doors to the dungeons when he had been nowhere else. With each place you searched resulting with him not being there, your anger built, the frustration worse than it had ever been.

“Jeez woman, is someone dead?”

“No but with that look it looks like someone’s about to be.”

The doors had opened revealing a far too happy Pansy and Theo, clearly enjoying how mad you seemed to be. You didn’t waste a second, pushing past the both of them to see Draco sat casually on one of the leather sofas, clearly bragging about how he had just punched Adrian.

“You had no right!”

As if it wasn’t enough that The Dark Lord was walking around his home barefoot and threatening his family’s lives; his ex-girlfriend was now going to kill him. Well, he’d rather die by her hands than his any day.

“You still haven’t told her?” You hadn’t even heard Pansy come up behind you, hand coming to rest on your shoulder. For everyone else it seemed like a jealous ex-girlfriend causing drama, a sharp look from Draco had sent everyone scrambling as he mumbled a silencing charm under his breath.

“If you want me to apologise for punching Pucey, I would rather you slap me again.” He was still lying to you. Your hands curled around his collar, pulling him up from his casual lounging across the sofa.

“Luna told me everything. You had no right to make that kind of decision for me. Who else knew?” You watched as the colour drained from his face, you turned to see Pansy, Theo and Blaise quickly avert their gazes. The three of them clearly thought they would be watching you shout at Draco for punching Adrian as they quickly found other places to be once they realised your true intentions.

“Can we actually talk now without you running off with your so-called girlfriend who has been dating another woman and without you only paying attention to me when you deem necessary?” Draco had slumped back onto the green leather, hand dragging over his face as he refused to meet your gaze again, the expression on his face a far cry from what it had been just moments ago.

“I can’t explain everything to you. Can you just trust that I’m doing what’s best for you? For us.”

If his voice hadn’t been so shaky, if his body hadn’t trembled like is had when he was 13 as you held him against you as he cried about the passing of his grandfather, you might not have decided to not push further.

So Harry was right, though some part of you had always known, after all in what world would Harry Potter make something like that up. You had just deluded yourself into thinking Draco wouldn’t be dragged into it. “I know Draco. You don’t have to say anything you can’t, but I know.”

His eyes whipped up to meet yours, clearly not expecting that response from you. You looked at him with the same fierce gaze he loved and for a second he thought you’d slap him again.

He thought you’d hit him and run or even worse, you’d stay.

“If this wasn’t the best possible option, I wouldn’t have chosen it, you have to understand that. It was better than the alternative of losing you and my parents. Do you know what he does to people? Do you know how he tears them apart? How he would rip your mind into shreds and then leave you with just enough life to watch him do the same to everyone else you care about.”

You stayed silent; you hadn’t thought about the bigger the picture this whole time, focusing only on you and your insignificant feelings.

“I refuse to put you at risk. If I had to make a choice; if I had to choose between saving you or my parents, I don’t know who I’d choose and that terrifies me. I can lose you and try to move on or find you again, but I can’t abandon my parents without signing their death warrants.” His words hurt. There was no masking that, but you knew he was right, he was making the most logical decision and you could not fault him for it, no matter how much your heart objected.

You just looked at him for a tense second, your brain trying to piece together what to say and what to think. Life had not prepared you for this moment.

“But the way you looked at her-“

“Looked at who?”

“Pansy.”

“I was imagining you.”

Your cheeks flushed with warmth, unsure if it was embarrassment, relief or anger. His fingers reached for yours, the familiarity of his wrapped around yours loosened the ball of nerves in your stomach just a little.

“Okay. Go.”

“What?” His fingers tightened their grip on your hand.

“I’ll wait until after the war; but you better find yourself on the right side. Just stay alive and I’ll find you.”

“And if I’m in Azkaban?” a voice so small you almost didn’t hear it.

“I don’t believe you could do anything horrific enough to end up in Azkaban; but even so, you better make some right choices because you hold our future in your hands Malfoy.”

He looked at you as though you had gone mad, and frankly you might’ve. After all, who would wait for their ex-boyfriend after finding out they were a death eater?

“You cannot be serious.”

“I would wait a lifetime for you.”

It had been those very words that had given him hope, something he didn’t think he would ever have again after taking the mark. He had not convinced his father to reconsider and that was something he would have to live for the rest of his life; but he had his mother. A mother’s love would prove yet again to be a saving grace.

The two of you may not have rebuilt what you had until years after, but when it came to making that all important choice, he had chosen the right one.

TAGLIST: @bbeauttyybbx @pipppaaaaalouisee @theslytherinprincessworld @fangirl-3d2y @tttyrus @scriptingslytherin @justmimithings @purpleskymalfoy @minigigglybabi @505weasleys @secretaccshh @obbrssession @whatwoulddracodo @thatoneniceslytherin @thehumanistsdiary @mariah-can-dream @futureofanthropology @ccabian @tobarmaidswhodontcount @dray-cookies  @xuckduck @dreamyginny @dracofeltonmalfoy @lord-byron @inglourious-imagines @audreythehufflepuff @beiahadid @moonlightorbit @imonlyherecauseimbored @dracosgoodgirl @dreaming-about-fanfictions @goldenxreid @avengers-end-me @sad-bitch-h0ur @zhangyixingxing1 @yourenotafailureoverall @pastelpuffbar @miso-tang @pixiedustsupplyco @harry-and-draco-loves @tsukibaby @dracoswhore007 @hogwartslut @mischiefisbeingmanaged @raylovessarcasm @drxcomvlfx @dracosballs @standingandstaring @its-chickenwing-450 @iamproudtobeaslytherin @mischiefisbeingmanaged @pxroxide-prinxcesss @slytherinxraven @jinnbie @lunalovegoodsgirlfriend @Utzelh8 @gloryekaterina @capkatie @jquick-18 @imcedricdiggorys @osterfieldnholland @explxsion @big-galaxy-chaos @malfoycrave @softlyqoos @krazykendraisnotinsane @minsuuwu @lumlfy @mllzhxrrs44 @weasleyis0urking @slytherinwh0re @gwlvr @m3ssytrash @aubreyanna02 @akaaaaashiiii @carrobrumbrum @dracoswift @bitchybeatle @samnblack @dumspirospero-1 @dracomalfoyswifeee @sydnee-kom-spacekru​

Those who asked for part 3!: @dracoxmgg​ @em2604 @gabiconstellation​  @azkabanlexi​ @indieslytherin​ @sushiims @sincerlymalfoy​ 

[petalsmooth]

Ok.

Let’s talk Lili.

First off we only know what stars put out about themselves or other people say about them. We are not friends with these people. We are not in their homes. We don’t usually hear what they say in unguarded conversation. What we know is what is out on social media with some highly distorted soundbites from chats or DM’s with her mother that were exposed.

We were initially presented a portrait pushed by her and her family no less of a middle class family with the standard girl next door hit it big narrative. Down to earth, relatable, somewhat quirky. Strong two parent supportive household. All that was missing were the apron and pearls.

This girl came out of the gates talking about a modernized Riverdale with two girls who would be actually close and not vying for the same redhead. Feel free to add/or correct along the way of course...especially early on when not following as closely.

We got very little in the way of insight into Cole and Lili because they were trying to keep it quiet even if there were hints together. Mostly during this period what fans were fed was that she was slightly awkward socially, maybe not the most intellectual but nice and harmless. She spoke of empowering women, independence, she constantly shut down the idea of Barchie and praised Bughead. Along through the year’s she would speak to social bullying or bullying in general. She would openly talk about struggles with mental health. She’d talk and show her cystic acne and share photos not all airbrushed in ode to body positivity. She’d talk about not having an hourglass figure, and cellulite and often go out in ratty shorts and a bun sans makeup. You see she’d talk about it then follow through by showing lived the walk or calling out photoshops done of her.

Again this is “relatable girl next door quirky Lili” we told was the REAL Lili.

She would frequently talk and post about her family and dogs at home and how much she loved and missed them...though oddly not so much her older sister.

At a certain point it became undeniable Cole and Lili were together to even the hardest deniers. Of course also the Met gala eventually made official for media.

We get have her liking posts such as Miley’s about how lucky she was to have a man who checked off all the boxes. But at times there were glimpses all wasn’t kosher. People have mentioned various cons where she’d be caught flirting somewhere else, or she’d be in a bad mood giving Cole a cold shoulder. We recently saw an old video of them walking and her basically demanding he drop the fans and attend her. We have the con were Camilla is sexually harassing Cole everywhere and Lili doesn’t shut it down until Camilla tries to grind on him. It was so bad even Mads intervened. We have the interview where she is talking over him or rolling her eyes and basically being the unprofessional brat her fans claim she is not. Even though it’s ON CAMERA. Snapping at your co worker/boyfriend and rolling your eyes during a professional interview is not deniable.

Flashforward to the trip to Italy because for me there was always something off about that. That trip was obviously planned far in advance. Clearly Lili was supposed to be there. Her fans quickly blamed Cole because Lili was working. Lili didn’t have to work. It wasn’t a career changing move to do that film. It did not do well. I’m not entirely sure what was happening around that time but I have the sense Cole was disappointed/a  little angry she prioritized it over him accepting very likely the offer AFTER the trip was planned.

Lili spirals during this time. Cole comes back to clean up mess. They are quiet on social media for a long time then slowly emerge again and eventually get the photo booth shots, the wedding and her mingling with NY friends for once. Turns out close to the end for them.

I don’t want to make this a Sprousehart post though although some relevance to bring part of it up. The point is Lili put her career over her relationship. It was a calculated decision. It was also the wrong decision. Her fans talk about her being this warm giving person but that was a cynical call and a pretty lousy thing to do to your boyfriend of several year’s. I’m all for supportive partners but there are time’s where you make sacrifices if you really care for someone and this was a special trip planned long in advance. She blew it off. If I’m the partner she does this too, I question why I’m putting in the effort if it doesn’t mean to them what it means to me. 

TBH I think the bad choices she made there is why tried to make it up by meeting with his friends, the wedding etc...

Something than clearly happened because by January they were done. Not sure we’ll ever know but it looked like they were trying to fix things given the happiness hadn’t seen on Cole’s faces in a long time in those booth pics and then...it was done. We didn’t know at the time, but this is timeline Cole gave. There was a brief attempt at reconciliation where she babysits him at a photo shoot and posts a photo of them in bed and then shortly after...Cole calls it off. 

He heads to LA, she follows him there but not without making sure to shove Casey’s face into her chest to post and rent a place close to where he is staying. She posts weepy messages about the world ending etc....and weird new photos mimicking old shoots with him so naturally people think this means whatever happened they worked through. Around same time she and hers manipulated her fans to try to cancel him earlier because she misunderstood a picture of Kaia....although flat out if he had been with Kaia he was SINGLE and it was no longer her business.

She tries to walk back the firestorm she unleashed on him by “defending” him from a lesser twitter trend after realizing misconstrued the Kaia picture, All summer she weirdly seems to be trying to avoid the topic if they are together or not despite saying once if they weren’t she’d tell people. She finally puts her foot in her mouth one two many times' and Cole confirms they broke up which she doesn’t acknowledge. Because she doesn’t want to be broken up.

As we know know it wasn’t all rainbows on the set even before all this happened as in the musical she’d launched an object at him hard enough to have the crew concerned. Lili fans keep saying Cole is abusive but the only evidence we have of abuse is her towards him. We also had her suddenly doing a 180 from past 4 year’s and excusing cheating with Archie and promoting everyone in her live recaps except Cole/Jughead.

Back to the events following Cole’s post....then we get a sudden string of interviews taking shots at Cole, doxxing him, implying he could have strayed (just to resurrect hate against him) but can’t say he actually did because she has no proof. We know this because in those chats admit it was just suspicion and paranoia and never did have any names.

We learn that Lili has been funneling news and gossip and photos to keep her mother’s hold on the fandom in check and her mother in turn has been bullying people who would stand on Cole’s side. They sought to ruin him. This is not debatable.

For year’s people had made fun and called Bree out for being an obsessive stalker unable to let a relationship go, then Lili starts doing the same. We know she has tried to copy Ari’s style, her mother made a snide comment about breast size, Lili tried to taunt Ari from on set and Ari shut her down. A girl who almost never was in the line of sight of paps suddenly is snapped everyday following break up even before the public new. That doesn’t just happen. She wanted the attention.

I’m not going to go into all of it, you all know it. Suffice to say revealing she has a bitter vindictive attitude she has submersed herself in ever since Cole made it clear no reunion. She won’t even broach the topic of Bughead/Jughead unless forced. You can spin all you like but the split screens was not an artistic choice by RD. It was spurred by need to keep them apart.

Lili last summer was doing precious little other than a post or two of Black Lives matter and then when Cole gets arrested suddenly she jumps on the me too and sets up impulsive lives. Maybe she meant well but a part of me thinks she did it to attract his attention. Notice once she got praise for it and the initial protests faded she more or less doesn’t bring it up anymore. Cole never intended to get attention, it just happened because he’s a star and got taken in to a jail cell. He never put himself on camera for notice. 

Lili also co-opts the murder of a girl to flaunt she thinks she looks good naked. Completely tone deaf. 

Lili very rarely is seen in fan photos, only usually when she’s getting flack for it online. She, a girl who talks about bullying, went on a  midnight tirade against a guy who dares to critique or poetry setting her fans on him. Then deleted it probably because publicist in her ear.

She first said poems not about Cole, than said you could read into what you wanted to sell them. Now she doesn’t want to talk poetry or sequels because it flopped and was critically panned.

There are constant rumors about Lili on sets of productions to point they even had someone on her newer movie try to downplay. Yet we see in a video the cast barely talking and looking tense on a boat. 

The girl who used to talk about body positivity now lets them airbrush abs onto her.

The girl who used to talk of therapy and mental illness now promotes OTC supplements for $ and cults.

If she mentions cellulite she uses other tik toks of people showing not her own. 

She said she would never be on tik tok, yet now has her own and post old videos that aren’t funny.

Lili once tired to attack Cole by talking about losing yourself in drugs or alcohol or sex yet we’ve seen her drug paraphernalia because she advertises. Her friends post and laugh over her being drunk. She was in an off and on relationship with Wallis that doesn’t seem to be about anything but sex.

We were told Coles friends are bad influences but Taylor is out there solicitating questionable clients and making videos slamming LILI’S COWORKER as a bad actor and his brother,

The majority of Lili’s posts no longer feature Sunny or her family/Addy. 

She insulted Vancouver, compared to a prison, and made it clear her creature comforts were of more importance than a pandemic. Not quite the attitude of an empath. Which she claims she is with intention to be a master which require sucking more gullible people into the cult.

She brags about being a “rich man” without understand the context. She went from artistic photos to modeling pinups to fuel her lack of self esteem.

She’s in her mid 20′s, claims she had grown and matured in the last year but there is no evidence of it. Still can’t work with her ex without buffers which still influences show direction though her fans deny.. Still lives off junk food and hangovers. Those glasses aren’t just for sun. Her timeline is mostly an ode to her vanity with pictures of herself and then her dog. She doesn’t seem to have any causes she’s deeply involved in on the side apart from her cult. She’s still stalking Cole as her impulsive makeup tutorial showed. She said she cut out of her life anyone who doesn’t service her. I highly doubt she is receiving quality therapy on the regular right now. She still does not seem to possess the ability to own her mistakes and apologize when warranted, rather deflects or erases when heat becomes too hot.

The content she puts out about herself post break up is very different than the bill of goods fans were sold before. She is a far cry from that quirky girl next door that stood FOR something more than vanity and shallow affirmation. So no, I don’t see what you see in her stans. Everything that once seemed to distinguish her from other spoilt princesses has long faded. 

[cant-think-of-anything]

All my energy was used on the fic, you don't get a title

Basically I took the scenes of lord of shadows and replaced the characters

( @littlx-songbxrd helped me develop the plot a lot so thank you Zia)

TW: descriptions of blood and injury, mentions of homophobia and ableism

Thomas had quickly come to the conclusion that he hated the land of Fae. Not because the location itself harboured ill experiences, but rather because of his travel companions.

He glanced at said travel companions. Alastair and Christopher were attempting to assemble a fire, struggling greatly because London wasn't exactly a place of forests. Alastair's face was stern with concentration, eyebrows drawn together as they always were, a permanent appearance of disapproval. His lips were turned down slightly, frustration causing him to scrunch up his face.

It wasn't adorable, Thomas scolded himself, it was intolerable. And entirely unenjoyable. He breathed a sigh, turning away from them and back at the rushing waters of a river. They'd been sent to be audience to the Seelie court and request their assistance to defeat Belial. It was a useless excursion, the Faerie wouldn't intervene unless their own land was being threatened. But the Clave had sent them regardless.

Christopher called his name, his voice a whispered yell as to not draw attention from whatever lurked in the forests. He picked his way back, settling on his sleeping mat and looking up. Without a fire, only moonlight made anything visible. Christopher had curled up already, but Alastair was awake. He was staring up at the stars his eyes wide with something like wonder.

The sight was disarming, but Thomas turned away, before Alastair caught his stare. Nothing good could result from that. The Sanctuary was a few weeks past, and what had started as longing glances and tortured pining turned into short tempers and quick annoyance. They hadn't talked, not the way Thomas desperately wanted to, but they had argued and bickered nearly every time they crossed paths. And he despised it.

Curling his hand into a fist, he turned onto his side and willed himself to sleep.

____

Alastair was fairly certain they were lost. It was as if Faerie shifted everytime they were on the correct path, and it accomplished nothing but adding to his frustration. And apparently, Thomas's.

"We should go north." He said, his eyes glinting with annoyance.

"Are you stupid? Do you want us to get killed? We'll end up there either way."

"Your method would take longer and time is something I don't fancy to waste."

"And your brilliant solution is to- what? Traverse through an entirely unmapped territory? It's far too dangerous, and I would like to keep my head adjoined to my body."

"Maybe sometimes it would do you some good to do something dangerous."

"Oh?" Alastair whirled towards him, their faces inches away from the other, each sparked with anger. "Do something dangerous? Like you? To my memory, it got you imprisoned!"

"Perhaps it would suit you to travel in solitude! Since you always seem to prefer that anyway!"

"I do not-"

"I really do not think we should be causing this much of a disturbance," Christopher chimed in, his face twisted in confusion, head swiveling between both of them. "They're simply... directions?"

"Without directions." Alastair said, "you end up lost." His eyes stayed locked with Thomas's, head tilted to meet his infuriating height.

"We won't get lost," he hissed back.

"For someone with a tattoo of a compass you truly have a horrendous sense of direction-"

"We could just," Christopher started, flipping the map over, before looking up with wide eyes. "Go through here." He gestured at the map.

"Absolutely wonderful. Let's leave, I wish to depart as soon as we're able."

A few moments passed before a loud screech like noise emerged from the forests. Because why, Alastair thought drawing out his weapons, would anything ever be simple for him. Christopher and Thomas pressed closer when the creature burst forth from the trees. And really creature was the only world he had for it. It appeared as a demon but not one Alastair had ever studied, and from the looks on the others faces they hadn't either.

"Do we-"

The creature lunged faster than any demon could, a flash of the murky green that colored it's scales. It's claws flashed, charging at Thomas. Alastair briefly registered slipping in between the two, lodging the wooden shaft of his spear between it's jaw. He sought out Christopher sliding under the thing to stab it with his blade, killing it quickly but not quickly enough to prevent when the creatures claws raked against the top of his chest.

Air rushed out of his lungs and he felt familiar arms wrap around him, catching him before he could fall. His eyes fluttered shut on their own record. He fought to regain conciusness, he refused to be unconscious around the likes of his companions, but he felt himself dragged into blackness regardless.

---

Christopher was accustomed to his friends odd relations. He had certainly gained enough practice observing the spats they often had. But whatever anger his cousin held towards Alastair was always a puzzle to him. He was sure it was a puzzle to them too considering their never ending shifts in emotion.

He looked over at Thomas who's face was twisted in something between intense worry and sorrow. His eyes dropped to Alastair who had still not woken up, bandages covered the scratches that stretched from his shoulder to the top of his neck. He winced remembering the injury, bleeding profusely with no runes to stem it. His own worry for Alastair had occupied much of his mind. James and Matthew would be furious at such a thing but Christopher found he didn't care.

"I'll go stand watch," Christopher offered, making his way to the outside of the cave they'd taken shelter in.

Thomas hated being in debt, he remembered. When they were younger he would never accept help unless it was forced upon him, his stubborn nature preventing it. And now after Alastair had risked his life twice to help him, he must feel like he owed something.

Christopher pulled himself onto one of the rocks resting outside of the cave and tipped his head back. He missed his home. Not whatever had overtaken it in the months past, he missed Henry, he missed his parents who he'd barely conversed with since before the killings had happened. He missed Alexander even if the child cried a storm. He glanced up at the sky, noticing the first rays of dawn breaking through the clouds. He pulled himself off of his rock with a sigh. He wished for normalcy more than anything. But he doubted it would grace them anytime soon.

He ducked under the entrance of the cave, opening his mouth to call out for Thomas to get ready to depart. But Thomas wasn't awake.

He was curled onto his side, facing Alastair, both evidently asleep. Their hands stretched out the distance between them and were laced together.

Christopher sucked in a breath. "Oh, Thomas," he breathed.

He'd known of his cousin's vauge feelings for Alastair from the time that Thomas was quite a bit shorter than him. But he hadn't fully understood what the two felt towards each other. He knelt between them, gently attempting to pry their hands apart, but both their grips tightened. As if through the small action they were able to pour every unsaid emotion they'd held.

Christopher wasn't a stranger to the way the Clave treated anyone they viewed as different. The way they shut down every attempt Henry had made to better the Shadowhunter world, the way they would continue to deny any of his own attempts. They claimed to want happiness and order for all but the moment someone proved to differ from their standards they would shut them down and rid of the evidence. They would remain under the pretense of fairness while they claimed credit for any accomplishments him or his uncle managed to force into them.

Thomas never had chosen himself, never his own happiness. Christopher let go of their intertwined hands, then looking at Thomas's face. It was almost drawn up in concentration. He stood, glancing at them once more before returning to the front of the cave and yelling for Thomas to wake up so they could depart to the castle. It wasn't as much as he wanted to do, but it was all he could.

___

Thomas dumped their small pile of belongings near the foot of the bed. The Seelie Queen had apparently chosen graciousness that night and permitted them two rooms. Christopher claimed the first one, leaving Thomas and Alastair to occupy the other. Not that Alastair had woken yet.

Thomas crossed the room, refusing to look where Alastair was laying on the bed, where he would soon need to lay next to him. He made his way to Christopher's room, too tired to truly marvel at the tall marble pillars and regal decor adorning the halls and bedrooms. Christopher was cross-legged on the bed, scrawling something into a notebook under the dim lights that shone through the waterfall close to the wall.

He pulled himself onto the bed next to him, worrying at the material of his nightshirt. Christopher looked up after a moment, fixing his peculiar eyes on Thomas.

"Are you all right Tom?"

The question shouldn't have startled him as much as it did. "I'm okay."

Christopher lips tightened. "You're lying. You usually do when people ask you."

Thomas breathed a soft sigh, pulling his legs up onto the bed. "I know."

Christopher studied him for a few moments, debating something in his mind before saying "You don't have to sacrifice yourself to make us happy Thomas. Anyone who truly cares for you will not love you any less for your decisions."

Thomas startled, looking at him with widened eyes. Something in his heart sped up, as if a weight had lifted from it causing it to beat faster in it's absence. "I don't- I don't understand-"

A hand gripped his forearm. "Go back to your room Thomas. I suspect he'll wake soon."

___

When Alastair woke he wasn't in a forest. He had known the Faerie were images of royalty but the room seemed ridiculously extravagant. He wanted to pull himself up in the bed but a sharp sting on his neck forced him back down.

The door swung open then, Thomas entered with a odd look on his face. It switched to overwhelming relief when he saw Alastair.

Swallowing, Alastair rose a hand his neck. The Faeries must have worked on the wound, it had healed over somewhat but not enough to relieve him of the pain.

He heard Thomas clear his throat. When Alastair looked up again, he'd moved to the other side of his bed. "You had gotten injured in the forest. We're in the Seelie Courts now, you've been indisposed for a few hours."

"Oh." He wasn't sure what else to add.

Thomas stared at him for a few unnerving moments before making a frustrated noise. He slid onto the bed, folding his legs underneath him and giving Alastair an imploring sort of look. "I'm sorry. For everything I've done. And I'm sorry I couldn't give you the right words in the sanctuary. I'll try to give them now."

Alastair inhaled sharply, from surprise rather than pain. "I don't understand. You shouldn't be apologizing-"

Thomas half smiled before cutting him off. "Let someone apologize to you for once. You deserve as much after the way we've treated you."

Biting his lip and looking away, Alastair noticed the pile of clothes and other luggage in the corner of the room. Oh. He turned back.

"Well Mr. Lightwood I find your apology to be satisfactory, despite it still being unnecessary."

Thomas smiled fully then and something in Alastair's chest loosened.

"Does this mean I am permitted to use the bed alongside you?" His voice was teasing.

"As long as you manage to stay on your side of it."

But that rule was quickly broken, Thonas shifted close and carefully curled his body around Alastair, his head resting on in his curls and limb wrapped loosely around him. Alastair breathed a small breath of relief before pressing his face into Thomas's neck and sleeping peacefully for the first time in years.

Happy birthday Zia!! Ilysm and you deserve literally every good thing in the world, you're amazing and very talented and yeah <33

Tagging: @adoravel-fenomeno @thewarthatsavedmylife @eugeniaslongsword @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @foxglove-airmid @littlx-songbxrd @alice-got-the-blues @writeforjordelia (lmk if you want to be added or removed)

I'll tag @youngreckless for thomastair week

[potteresque-ire]

Not sure if this has circulated before, but here’s a link to Henry Jenkin’s reactions to 227, largely as responses to an interview he did with Sanlian Lifeweek magazine (三聯生活周刊), a publication modelled after TIME magazine and published under China Press Publishing group (中國出版集團), the largest and state-owned publisher in China. The magazine asked for Jenkin’s opinions on the fandom-related aspects of 227 back in March, 2020. Henry Jenkins, as many may already know, is among the most renowned scholars of (Western) fan culture ... if not the most renowned.

Personally, I find this article to be quite limited in perspective, because 227 had a significant non-fandom-oriented, sociopolitical component ~ and hence its scope, its chaos, its damage. IMO, 227 stopped being a fan war, stopped being about solos, cpfs, and even Gg the moment AO3 was shut down ~ the powerful Chinese state had intervened, and the incident necessarily became a political incident. That One Fic on AO3, the conflict between solos and cpfs about whether and where That Fic should exist was at most a lighter left at the scene of what would become the blaze; it wasn’t even responsible for igniting the first fire. Most i-turtles (i-fruits?) are probably aware too at this point: if fan wars are sufficient to start 227, then there wouldn’t have been a 227 ~ because 227 would have been every date of the year.

Fan culture is fundamentally transgressive, and what that means can only be defined in the context of the subculture’s “mainstream” sociopolitical and cultural environment. I therefore find the article’s attempt to transplant Western fan culture’s observations / theories / analysis / conclusions to the incident without explicitly comparing, addressing in depth the differences of the pre- and post-transplant environment to be ... prone to rejections (as organs are after transplantations!)—exclusion from being useful or valid. And this article was very short on such comparisons or address. Jenkins being a fandom expert aside (and he was careful about not treading outside his area of expertise), early “antis” of 227 presented themselves as crusaders for the freedom of speech and, by late March when this article was published, the heated debates surrounding the incident on Chinese social media had already led to embarrassment for multiple powerful state publications. It was probably a wise choice to not make another dive into the political aspects of the incident.

Being a new(-ish) turtle who joined the fandom a full half-year after 227, I’ve been backtracking, trying to really understand the incident, which remains very much beyond comprehension in many aspects. The discussions I’ve dug up that have most fascinated me have been those in non-fandom spaces, by non-fandomers / politics enthusiasts who barely knew who Gg was, who didn’t know That One Fic involved more than one idol and had zero knowledge about solos vs cpfs. In these discussions, “antis” are not referred to as “antis” because while the action of the so-called “227 coalition” was to kill Gg’s career, that wasn’t considered its ultimate goal ~ its ultimate goal was to warn whoever tried to clamp down the freedom of expression that their opposition was strong enough, populous to fight back and take away whatever, whoever those who attempted the clamp-down care the most about. In this case, “Gg fans”—I put this in quotes because eventually, no one would know who would lurk behind those pro-Gg Weibo IDs (and the anti-Gg ones as well)—were the perceived enemies of creative freedom. Gg, assumed to be the one, the symbol of what “GG fans” cared about the most, naturally became the target of the coalition.

Gg wasn’t special in that sense ~ and that was perhaps, the saddest thing I found about this incident as a Gg fan (without quotation marks); Gg could be any idol who achieved top fame at the moment, who had enough fans to make the point known. The coalition was therefore not “anti-Gg” in its ideological sense. It was anti the fan circle culture that had cemented Gg’s popularity, that had already been known to deal extremely poorly with dissent—complaints had been abound that c-ent was no longer fun for bystanders because the latter could issue no critique, not even doubt, about an idol without the fear of being reported, torn down by fans. The coalition eventually grew to include anti the many happenings, the many censorships and imprisonments in the past few years that had silenced the creative crowd in China, happenings people dared not speak about beyond a loud grumbling ...

The coalition tried to take down Gg, because they couldn’t take down the force that had shut down AO3, that was truly responsible for the silencing. They played the Hunger Games in the Weibo arena instead of challenging Who The Real Enemy Was, because some might not have given much thought about  The Enemy; some might have thought the Enemy too invincible to be worth the effort; some might have got too carried away by their blood thirst, the cruel schadenfreude of shredding a beautiful, successful young man into pieces, and forgot why they were there in the first place ... 

And that was only the political side of 227. 227 was also widely suspected to have a commercial component, which added another layer to the symbolism behind Gg the Idol ~ pretty much as soon as 227 happened, netizens investigated, tried to uncover the chain of capital behind Gg. With the scent of money was the memory of filth associated with it, in a country not exactly  unknown for its corrupt business practices. Much like in The Book of Exodus in the Bible, the Idol is believed to be forged with gold; it is ungodly, tainted. Whether Gg the Person was identical to Gg the Idol, Gg the Symbol mattered to few. That Gg *was* a person seemed lost to many ... 

I’ll have to dive into the non-fandom aspects of 227 with more rigour. As much as I'd love to leave 227 behind, every time I see Gg, I see its legacy on his face, in his smile, and perhaps, I’m not the only one ~ ADLAD cast him as Patient #5 because of 227′s effect on him. Put it another way, 227 is already modifying, writing Gg’s career trajectory ~ a trajectory that is undoubtedly under scrutiny by many who wish to duplicate his success but circumvent his pain. And every time I see a young idol—Gg, Dd, and anyone else—I wonder if the hurt of 227 can happen to them (again) because the crux of the incident has never been resolved; the oppression and silencing have remained strong as ever. 

Anyway (sorry for the rant) ... what I found noteworthy about this article was the quotes the magazine highlighted in its published form (in Chinese), which weren’t highlighted by Jenkins on his own website. They reflected what the magazine would like to be the take-home messages of the interview. I’ve listed them below; all of which had Jenkins as the speaker:

[Pie Note: About Real Person Fiction (RPF) in Western fandoms]

“American fans often do have some shared norms about what is and is not appropriate to write, mostly having to do with protecting the privacy of other people in the star’s life. Writing about the star is seen as fair game; writing about their family members is not.”

---

[Pie Note: About GG being “cast” as a transgender woman in The One Fic that started the incident; gender in fandom]

“We write fan fiction as a form of speculation and exploration. For some people, it may be one of the few spaces in the culture where they can express who they are, what they are feeling, what they are desiring. And for others, it is a place of “what if” where they explore in fantasy things they would not necessarily desire in reality.” 

---

[Pie Note: Whether GG should be held responsible for his fans’ behaviour]

“Under these circumstances, I would not hold a performer responsible for his fans’ behaviors but the performer is responsible for their own behavior and fans may respond negatively to performers who over-react to the existence of alternative fantasies and insult or hector their audiences.”    

---

[Pie Note: About AO3 and why fans were so upset about its closure] “Keep in mind that AO3 is a particular kind of platform. Alongside Wikipedia, AO3 is one of the greatest accomplishments of participatory culture in the digital era.”

---

[Pie Note: About the “problematic” content on AO3]

“Among my findings were that fan fiction sites can be a valuable space for young people to acquire skills (and receive feedback) on their writing from more experienced writers who share these same passions ... That said, while teens have participated in fandom, a large part of those on AO3 are adults, engaging in adult conversations on adult topics.”

---

[Pie Note: About media text in the new media era]

“First, I would stress the proliferation of media texts at the current moment ... We have access to a much broader range of media content than ever before and in this context, fans play a constructive role in curating that content, helping some shows get greater visibility ...  Second, these texts have become more malleable”

---

[Pie Note: About idols not producing “good” media texts]

“Rather, the question should be what are fans finding meaningful about these performers and the texts they generate. I start from the premise that human beings do not engage in meaningless activities. I may not immediately recognize why something is meaningful but my job as a scholar is to understand why cultural materials are meaningful to the people who cherish them.”

---

My understanding of this selection of quotes is this: this state publication (as others) was quite ready to forgive Gg, to put this incident behind. It could choose to not publish this interview; it could choose to leave out certain quotes, or not do the highlighting that cast both AO3 and Gg in a positive / innocent light. But it did all these things. This article furthers my impression that the state never intended 227 to blow up the way it did, and that it did—enough for stories about it to be found in non-China websites, and in English—was what I’m still trying to comprehend. 227 was, admittedly, how I was first introduced to Gg beyond Wei Wuxian. And as I got to know Gg, like Gg, my want to understand 227 only becomes stronger, perhaps because only through comprehension I feel I can find peace for the GG fan (again, without quotation marks) in me.

Maybe I should email Dr Jenkins and ask if he’s looking for a PhD candidate. 5 years of research and thinking ... maybe that’s what it’ll take. 

I feel I’ve already started anyway. 

[thomotomo]

Kia ora! Could i request a peaky blinders x male reader, where y/n is in a secret relationship with his brother tommy shelby? fluff and hiding from period typical homophobic laws

A/N: Hello dear anon! I hope you will like it! I’m not watching Peaky Blinders so I tried to keep in the universe and in character but I’m pretty sure I messed up a few things lol. Hopefully you will enjoy it nonetheless! Thanks for requesting :3

TW/CW: Incest, Slurs/derogatory terms about gay men, misoginy (ig, well they don’t talk well about women), Mention of period typical homophobia - Read at your own risks

Words: 2.4K

The atmosphere in the room was tense. Some members of the gang had been attacked and it seemed that other rival gangs in Birmingham were pushing their luck, titillating your family into making mistakes.

You weren’t really concentrated on the discussion, rather you observed your brother (and secret lover) who was seated opposite to where you were standing, a whisky in his hand, discussing the serious matter with a frown on his face with your brother, Arthur and your Aunt Polly.

You tried following the flow of the conversation but the soft light reflecting on Tommy’s face was making him way too attractive and his shining eyes were marvellous, you wanted to kiss away the frown on his face, hold him in your arms and proclaim to the world that you loved him.

Sadly, you weren’t able to do so for a numerous of reason, firstly he was your brother, and although wedding between cousins were accepted, people were taking less kindly two children from the same mother to be in love. And secondly well, people of your kind weren’t well liked (not to say absolutely despised), two men lying together was seen as an abomination and you had witnessed a few times boys being beaten for being accused of being a “fag”.

Truth to be told, you hated being unable to be with him, go outside together, not giving a care about anything or anybody but sadly you knew you couldn’t do that. You wanted to stay alive and not cause the downfall of your family’s gang and basically not disgracing them socially, so here you were, trying to listen to the conversation.

“What are your thoughts (Y/N)?”, it was Arthur who spoke up. You tried to stay collected on the outside and completely panicking inside.

“Oh erm. I think we should maybe execute one person, one example to assert our dominance and show them this as a warning and we won’t stay here doing nothing?”, they nodded as you sighed, feeling less stressed now that you answered to them.

You lit up a cigarette and smoked slowly as they discussed about who they will take down, their level in the other gang. And after debating for another ten minutes they settled on kidnapping, Ralph McAllister, a middle-ranked member from the Birmingham Boys you had seen few times in town.

All of you stayed a bit more, discussing other issues until Polly had to leave, kissing all of you on the cheek. Arthur did the same, but leaving with a clasp on the shoulder, not without proposing both of you to meet him tonight at the Garrison Pub, which you agreed to do, he left both of you alone.

You waited until you were sure they were far enough and that nobody would be able to see you, you walked to Tommy, putting your cigarette on the ashtray and took his face in your hands, kissing him softly. He sighed in the kiss and put his free hand on your hip, gently caressing it with his thumb.

“Everything is such a mess. Fucking assholes they think they can try and steal our territory.”, his hand gripped your hip a bit tightly. You caressed his cheeks with your thumbs, looking at him seriously.

“They fucking sucks but we’re going to crush them. Don’t think about them now and relax.”, you felt his grip loosen as he downed the rest of the whiskey and put the glass on the table next to him. He tapped your hip with his fingers, making you move from above him, allowing him to stand up. He gazed at you lovingly and took your hand in his.

“Maybe we should move to the bedroom? There will be no risks of being the caught.”

You nodded and followed him in his bedroom, locking the door behind you as Tommy closed the curtains, just in case. Tommy then went to his seat and you joined him, sitting on his lap, his hand directly went to your check. You leaned in it, smiling at him. You enjoyed those quiet moments with him where you could do anything without any care in the world.

He peppered your cheeks with kisses, attempting to kiss all of your freckles, making you laugh lowly. Tommy then looked at you with a gentle smile and finally kissed you on the lips; you deepened it, adding a bit of tongue to the kiss. Tommy’s free hand went around your waist, smiling in the kiss and after a few more seconds of kissing he moved his mouth to your jaw, then your neck, letting you breath as he lightly bit your neck, avoiding leaving any marks.

He stopped after a while, breathing a bit strongly, putting his head on your shoulder, both of his arms now wrapping your waist. You stroked his hair, smiling softly and shuddering as his hot breath hit your neck.

“We’ll have to meet with Arthur later…”, you regretfully said.

“Yeah… But don’t think about that love. Now we’re having a moment together.”

You smiled at him and yelped when he stood up and suddenly put his hands under your thighs. He chuckled at the sound as by reflex you wrapped your legs around his waist. He walked you to his bed and put you on it, coming to lie next to you. He brought you in his arms, cuddling you and kissing your forehead. Both of you chilled there for a while in silence, bathing in each other’s love.

After a while lying on the comfortable, cuddling and sometimes talking, you decided that even though you really wanted to stay with him you had to be “productive” and go and take care of the horses to avoid raising suspicions.

You regretfully left Tommy’s arms, kissing him gently as he stood up too, to go and plan the disappearance of McAllister. You unlocked the door and kissed him once last time before making your way to your room, changing your clothes and then went to the stables. You started by putting the horses in the field made for them and cleaned all the stalls. It was an unusual job for the son of a wealthy family but considering your family was a gang  it didn’t really matter, at least you were someone to be trusted with the horses.

You really enjoyed taking care of the horses, even though sometimes it was it was very demanding job and the horses weren’t always in the best of the moods but it was an entertaining job, and you really loved the feeling of seeing the horses happy, clean and healthy and you were sweaty and not looking at all like a man of your rank.

Once all the cleaning and filling the food tanks of the horses you brought them one by one back in their stable. You stayed a bit longer with Ludy, a Shire horse that you considered yours instead of the family’s, patting him and giving him a little treat before leaving to take a shower as it was almost time for you to go and meet Arthur.

You put some clean clothes and waited for Tommy to come down, you were almost wondering if he had forgotten about it, knowing how he could be whenever he started to work, but before you could even try to walk back upstairs he arrived and shoot you a wink with a smile.

“You look great brother.”

“Same about you Tommy. You’re going to pick up some lass at the bar?”

“Maybe, we’ll see..”, he licked his lips as he checked you out. You saw the maid behind him, having some sheets in her arms.

You walked outside the mansion and met with the driver. Both of you went in the back and discussed about random things until you arrived at the bar. You stepped out and told the driver he wouldn’t have to go and come search you.

You readjusted your coat and walked inside The Garrison with Tommy right behind you, it was filled with quite the people. The pair of you looked around until you found Arthur in a corner drinking some whisky while flirting with the waitress.

You went and joined him as the waitress left and sat next to him with a smile.

“So, in what honour are we drinking tonight?”

“To the future death of that Birmingham motherfucker and to the calm that will be back right after.”

You all laughed at that and nodded in agreement, the asshole will soon be 6 feet under and all the gangs will either prepare or run away like the rats they were. Tommy ordered a round of drinks and you talked together, sometimes looking at the girls in the pub. Suddenly Arthur whistled.

“Tommy, the blonde lass over there had been watching you for a good while, y’should talk to her, bet she’d like your dick. You should go to talk to her.”

“Wait”, you intervened, “You should wait a bit more, like making her desire you even more so she like jump on you when you come at her. She seems kind of an easy one.”

“(Y/N) is right, she seems kind of an easy one. Give it 5 minutes Tommy boy and then you can get that bitch.”, all of you laughed at that, but in the back of your mind you didn’t want her to touch him. You desperately wished you could claim him in front of everyone, but life wasn’t fair sadly and unless you wanted to die well you could only do so much.

When the five minutes passed Tommy went to the blonde with a predatory grin, saying to both of you. “Take note gentlemen, this is how you woo ladies.”

Both of you laughed and you moved a bit, taking a drink from your glass, observing how he walked to the girl and nearly immediately kissed her neck, probably whispering some sentences to get her. You felt the atmosphere less joyous as you older brother was also observing the scene. There was never bad blood between the two of you but it was clearly not the same kind of love between you and Arthur than you and Tommy (damn right, Arthur was so constipated with his feelings you could easily think he hated you).

“You’re not a fag right?”, you tensed as he asked that. He wasn’t looking at you, but surely from the corner of his eyes he was observing your reaction. You tried not to look uncomfortable and laughed as if he told you a joke.

“Me a fairy? Really? Nah those past weeks Ludy doesn’t looks pretty well so I’m trying to see if anything is wrong with him. And with the mating seasons nearing all the horses are on the edge so I’d like to avoid some of them to get knocked up you know.”, you didn’t like using Ludy for an escape but you didn’t saw any other choices there. Arthur hummed and took a sip of his drink.

“Because I wouldn’t want people to find out my brother’s a sissy. I wouldn’t like to know you’re a sissy. Because if you are…”, he looked at you with a weird glint in his eyes and you were pretty sure that if he knew you were an homosexual there wouldn’t be any blood bond between you anymore and he would murder you. You repressed a shudder and smirked.

“Nah don’t worry about that. I’m just occupied and worried about the horse’s health. But don’t worry next time we go out I’ll pick a cute lass, probably a redhead y’know?”, he laughed and downed the rest of his drink in one go.

“Yeah you always got the weirdest tastes brother.”

You looked back at Tommy who was still flirting with the girl and in a blink of an eye she disappeared, you knew where she went and your brother who probably followed her confirmed your suspicions. After all he always was better at hiding his feelings and acting too and you envied him for that. The thought of sex with any woman was repulsing you and even though you were able to go though it all with prostitutes or random women in bars, you wanted to throw up after every time.

“Oooh little Tommy is getting his fair share of fun with the little blondie. I wonder if she’s a screamer or not.”

“I’m betting she’s more like a squeaky mouse.”

“We’ll see when pretty boy is back!”

The two of you stayed here, discussing and you occasionally threw a lustful gaze to the women in the pub trying to make Arthur think you were watching them while he was flirting with some waitress, sometimes giving them a clap on their ass. You had the time to take another drink until Tommy came back, putting his pants back in place.

Arthur laughed and clapped, attracting a bit of attention that was quickly diverted when you threw them dark looks. Tommy sat back with a smirk and Arthur clapped his shoulder.

“C’mon Tom, how was she? Loud or not?”

“She wasn’t making much noises, but she was tight as fuck.”

“I was right then!”, you hit your older brother on the shoulder with a laugh.

“Tsk for once boy, for once.”

You kept bantering until Arthur decided it was time for him to go back home. You followed him outside and kept discussing for a short moment, observing the surroundings with a distrustful look on your face, after all night was always the best moment to murder people and you wanted to avoid that. You watched as Arthur left and then both you and Thomas started to walk in the opposite direction.

The streets weren’t quiet, from the drunk lads trying to walk to the fights, it was clear it was animated almost as much as during broad daylight. As you turned in a dark and seemingly completely empty street. You pulled Thomas with you and put him against the wall, immediately covering his lips with yours.

He was shocked for an instant and then relaxed in your grasp, kissing you back. After a few seconds of kiss, you stopped pressing him on the wall and licked your lips while looking at him with a spark in your eyes.

“You fucking- You could have waited for us to be more away!”, Tommy whispered with a disbelieved smile on his face.

“I couldn’t wait to kiss this bitch away from you. But don’t worry I’ll finish that somewhere else.”, this time you were the one leaving him hanging as you walked away, hearing his quick steps to join you.

Hopefully for you the maid wouldn’t be home by the time you’d be back or you’d have to keep him extra quiet.

_______________

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the story! Don’t forget to like, reblog and comment if you did and you can leave me a tip on KOFI if you want! Take care <3

[siriusmydeer]

Oh and Hello to you today you fine and brilliantly skilled author who I have came to love and adore, you see I know I’d already recently requested something from you but I had a taste of your absolutely amazingly fine talent and just had to come back for more

Ya see, this person here (hem hem, me) would like to ask if she could request something dealing with Young Remus Lupin Remmy Boi being a sweet older brother during the summer to his adoptive sister who is almost his age and very gay and him letting her hang out with him and the Mauraders because her friends were douchbags and skippy skip to Remus letting her rant about it while they sit in his bed, her head in his lap while she’s curled up in a ball and he’s half-heartedly reading while talking to her about her douche-bag friends before he cuddles his sis to his chest and lets her sleep in his bed that night

Anywho, sorry for annoyin you again but I’ve had a shit day and wanted to relax with one of my fav authors and a cuppa tea

baby i was so excited to write this, my internal message to homophobes lies within this one shot. y/n’s vent gave me very “gia ranting her her friends about being bi and it should be nobodies business”

my little sister

brother!remus lupin x fem!reader, girlfriend!marlene mckinnon x fem!reader

warnings: homophobia, mentions of slurs, mentions of conversion camp, angst? but not rly, fluffy remus, WOLFSTAR💋, swearing, jokingly mentions of murder, big brother energy from remus, um mentions of penises and masterbating😭, lowkey ravenclaw slander (ONLY MALES I PROMISE) and y/n being a baddie

word count: 1.3k

you were.... happy. yes, not in a sarcastic way. you had finally found a girl that didn’t just want to be your friend, or hate crime you. you found a girl that you wanted to kiss, a girl you wanted to love and girl that reciprocated that love. but unfortunately for you, your love choices had consequences and everyone else thought it was there business, commenting on it.

“𝗼𝗶, 𝗹𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗻! 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗼𝗹𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗵𝗲’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗹 𝘆𝗲𝘁?”

“𝗰’𝗺𝗼𝗻 𝗹𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗻, 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝘆𝗲𝘁?”

“𝗶 𝗯𝗲𝘁 𝘆/𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗿𝗺 𝘀𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲𝗿. 𝗶 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗲’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗹.”

“𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗰𝗿𝘂𝘀𝗵 𝗼𝗻 𝗺𝗲, 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁? 𝗶 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗶’𝗺 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁.”

so to society, you weren’t normal. the worst part was you weren’t always the one hearing it, the girls in your dorm heard it, your brother heard about it and his best friends also happen to hear about it. that also never happened to stop them from shooting a hex or 20 in someone’s direction but, nonetheless, you “weren’t normal.”

you were sitting in the library studying next to your gorgeous girlfriend, marlene mckinnon. oh did something as innocent as studying get flipped into so much more, both of you working on mcgonagalls transfiguration homework. all fine and well until the 7th year ravenclaws decided to crawl up your butt and die.

“i see you two haven’t been sent away yet.”

“aw well if it isn’t the two girls who think they’re in love.”

“the two fa-“

one of the boys didn’t even get to finish his sentence before your wand was pinned against his neck, and suddenly he was speechless.

“‘m gonna say this as delicately as possible to spare your shit feelings but, before you finish your very derogatory sentence i would love for you to reconsider your words.” you started, “i personally think it’s hilarious that you gits are so bothered by whomst m’intimate with.”

“for being known as the smart house, you 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 are so bloody stupid. i could rip out my own brain and give it to you and it still wouldn’t be enough for you to learn how to mind your damn business.” you said firmly, “your 𝗺𝘂𝘀𝗸 has sunken into the air, so me and my girlfriend are going to get going.”

you took your wand away from his neck before the 3 boys scrambled to the other side of the library, in fear. you gathered both you, and marlene’s things before slinging your bags over your shoulder and walking out of the library. before you could turn the corner, her other arm gripped your arm putting you both to a halt.

you turned towards her beet red face, and eyes shining in adoration. “dude, i think that was the hottest thing you have ever done.” she said before pulling you into a lip lock outside of the library. would you have been very nervous in any other situation?absolutely. i mean you were kissing a female, in public, at school, in 1975. but in this moment you couldn’t care less about anything or anyone, just the beautiful girl that you were besotted with kissing you right now.

“good.” you giggled as you pulled away before pulling her arm in the direction of one of the hidden corridors.

the next time you found yourself diminished over your sexuality, you went to people who you genuinely felt safe and comfortable with. you burst through the marauders dorm, forgetting to knock but quickly covering your eyes.

“i really hope none of you are masterbating right now, because i’m sure as not in the mood to see a penis.”

“c’mon mini-moony, you’re literally never in the mood to see a penis.” sirius replied, you uncovered your eyes and saw sirius walk over to remus’ bed and put his head on remus’ shoulder, and a light blush covered both of there faces. james on the other hand was on the floor writing lily, one of the only other people who supported you, another love letter.

“ok so let me start, sirius and remus please splash some cold water on your face. james, get off your arse and actually be a normal person and try and have a normal conversation with lily because i assure you she doesn’t even read those letters. and the grand finale, if i get called 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 one more damn time necks will be broken and body parts and fluids will scatter on the floor.” you huffed, and sat at end of remus’ bed nonchalantly.

at the part of your mini-monologue where you mentioned being called a slur, james and sirius happened to jump from where they were, surrounding you with questions. “who called you that?!” “i need names, now, mini-moony.” meanwhile remus aggressively grabbed his wand and made a bee-line to the door. “OI! BROTHER OF MINE.” remus stopped at the sound of your voice and turned around, his grip on the wand leaving his knuckles a shade of white. “sit. now.” he scoffed before sitting on the bed staring straight at you.

you debated for a moment, before looking at remus. “lucius malfoy and his toerag puppy dog, evan rosier.” you shrugged before all of them made a run at the door, messily grabbing their wands stomping down the stairs leading to the common room.

as fifth year came to an end, summer eventually came to a start. as you were unpacking your trunk and putting your clothes in there rightful spots in your dresser before you heard a knock at the door. “come in!”

remus opened the door, leaning against the frame. “hey, you okay?” he knew it was a stupid question to ask, but ever since you came into his family he felt a sense of protectiveness over you. he would always look at you like a little girl who needed her laces double knotted because she would trip on them, and how she needed to climb on furniture to grab something and especially when his little sister wasn’t his little sister anymore and became and illegal animagus for him.

“having your picture with nice little names on them, i’m brilliant.” you said sarcastically before sitting on your bed and remus following your lead. he leaned his back against the headboard as you threw your head on his lap, curling yourself to make yourself as tiny as possible. “i mean why the hell does anyone care anyways? it’s not like i’m intervening in there lives, i’m not killing anyone? it works the exact same except it’s a girl and not a boy. i just don’t understand why everyone thinks they should have an opinion on something that isn’t there business to start with.” you vented as he rubbed your back, while reading. “i mean, i understand.” you looked at him with a raised brow, “sirius?” he sheepishly looked up from his book and nodded before looking down at his book again and blushing.

“please, i could spot that from a mile away. i mean you aren’t exactly subtle, at the mere touch you both look like you got out of a sauna.” you said, matter of fact like and pointing your finger in the air sassily, “at least lily and james don’t care.” he mumbled trying to make you and him feel better. “everyone shouldn’t care, but then again everyone else in this universe is also a pest.” you sighed, as he continued reading but not before speaking.

“people are stupid.”

“you’re right, people are stupid.”

“but you know what makes us feel better?”

“what?”

“chocolate.”

“wow remus, it’s almost like i had no idea.”

“well i’m always right, so suck it up and take it.” he said shoving a chocolate bar in your face.

“i mean you could always have a sleepover with me where we eat chocolate and laugh at bad movies?” he said before looking down at you.

“remus, first yes, second how the hell does sirius put up with your ‘know-it-all-ness’?” you looked at him smirking, clearly he didn’t like that and he closed his book smacking it against your head.

“𝗼𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝘂𝘀!”

[chordwrites]

The Healer

Prologue (not necessary to read first but provides some context)

Healer hid, watching Hero approach the beaten and unmoving Villain. If they were dead, all of Healer’s efforts would be meaningless. 

Usually, Healer would wait until the battle was over to attend to the injured, or would find a moment when the fighting parties were separated to offer a quick heal. But Hero and Villain had never separated long enough for Healer to intervene, and Healer doubted that this hero would grant Villain any respite. 

Healer pulled a few fireworks out of their satchel. They snuck a few building away—close enough for Hero to hear it but far enough to give Healer a few moments with Villain while Hero investigated. Healer muttered a small prayer, to who, they did not know. If this didn’t work, they’d be all out of ideas for helping Villain. 

Quickly, they lit the fireworks, aiming them low, but away from any buildings that might hold occupants. The dumpsters should work nicely, and if a fire started, Hero would be able to put it out before it affected any citizens.

If their plan was successful, that is. 

Healer raced towards the site of the battle, the explosion of fireworks sounding a few paces behind them and the impact against the dumpster augmenting the noise. They stuck to the shadows, and sighed in relief when they found Villain alone. 

Healer crept forward, dread building as they searched for any sign that Villain was still breathing. They rested their hands on Villain’s chest, smiling a little when Villain’s chest rose and fell against their palms. 

Healer concentrated, focusing warm energy out of their hands and into Villain, willing their body to be whole again. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Hero asked from behind them. 

Healer jumped, but maintained the energy coursing into Villain.

“Healing them,” they said weakly. 

“Why?”

“Because I can, and they needed it.” Their motivation had never been complex. If you have the ability to help others, you do it. 

Hero scoffed. “Don’t you know the things they’ve done? You’re healing a monster.”

“I... not the specifics.” Healer had tried to stay away from the news and media after they’d realized that the heroes could be just as cruel as the villains.

“You’re young, so I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. They’ve murdered hundreds, and the total casualty tally is even larger. Is that kind of person worth saving?” Hero paused, either waiting for a response or allowing Healer to soak in their question. Regardless, Healer chose not to respond, instead staring intently at their hands and the warm glow that emanated from them. “We always need new heroes, and your drive to help others is admirable. But what you’re doing now isn’t justice.” Hero pointed at Villain. “Helping someone like them isn’t justice.”

Healer’s hands shook. “I don’t care about justice. I don’t think I have the right to decide who deserves to be saved and who doesn’t.” God, healing was draining enough without debating personal morals with another super. 

“Then listen to me, I’m saying this one doesn’t.” 

The arrogance. “I don’t think you should be able to make that decision either,” Healer said.  

The following silence sent a shiver down Healer’s spine. Dammit, why couldn’t they heal any faster? “If you save them, all the death they wrought from here on out will be your responsibility to bear.”

Healer's power continued to pour into Villain. That was a responsibility that Healer accepted, though they did not bear it well. It kept them up at night, and the accompanying depression had worried their mother to no end for the year or so they’d been doing this. They didn’t want Villain to hurt anyone, but they didn’t want to see them killed either. Healer didn’t know what was right, but they knew Hero’s way wasn’t it. It couldn’t be. They'd decided it was easier to forget about right and wrong, and just focus on healing anyone they could. Healer wouldn’t discriminate between the injured and dying. 

Maybe it was too idealistic. Or maybe the adults weren’t idealistic enough. 

Hero laughed quietly—a dark, intimidating sound. “If you’re helping the likes of a villain, you might as well be one yourself.” 

The sudden rustle of movement startled Healer out of their concentration. They spun around, and Hero was in front of them, fist swinging. Healer braced themself.

Arms wrapped around Healer from behind pulling them back just before Hero’s fist connected. The arms grasped Healer’s waist and lifted them into a firefighter’s carry over Villain’s shoulder. Villain dodged a few more swings, keeping Healer secure despite the fast pace of the encounter. 

Then, Villain ran, weaving between buildings and through alleyways as Hero kept on their trail. Not knowing what else to do, Healer clutched the back of Villain’s super suit. 

Though Hero was fast, Villain seemed to know exactly where to go to confuse them, slinking into the shadows and maneuvering through the most obstructed areas. A few minutes into the chase, Villain halted, causing Healer’s face to slam into Villain’s back. The two ducked into a crevice between two buildings that Healer wouldn’t have noticed if Villain hadn’t been directing them into it. 

The two sat in loud, breathy silence for a long time. Villain had an arm wrapped around Healer, and Healer clung to that arm like a lifeline. They didn’t understand what just happened. They were just helping people, weren’t they? How could that warrant a death sentence from a hero who was sworn to protect them? 

And with Hero’s strength, that strike would have been one. 

Healer didn’t know how long they waited, but at last, Villain let go of them and stepped out of their hiding spot, Healer not far behind. 

Finally getting a good look at Villain, Healer scanned them for injuries. Though they’d managed to close up the vital ones, Villain still looked worse for wear, bruises covering almost every inch of visible skin, and blood soaking through most of their suit. 

Villain stared at Healer, and Healer thought they saw a stern expression buried beneath the mask and mountain of bruises. 

“I... I can heal up the rest of your wounds for you,” Healer said. 

Villain shook their head. Healer wanted to protest, but as they stepped forward, their legs shook and their head spun. Even if Villain had accepted their offer, it was doubtful that Healer would have been able to follow through. 

Villain tapped their throat, drawing Healer’s attention, then mouthed something. Thank you. 

“No problem,” Healer said, their voice cracking a little. “Thank you, too, for getting me out of there.” For saving my life, Healer thought. 

Villain nodded and mouthed something else, but as much as Healer concentrated, they couldn’t decipher the meaning. Villain shook their head again, this time more so at themself than at Healer, and pulled out a small pocket notebook and a pen. They scribbled something down.

Where do you need to go? I’ll make sure you get there. 

“Oh, that’s alright. You don’t have to do that.” As much as they wanted to help heroes, villains, and civilians alike, they didn’t really need anyone to know where they lived. 

Villain stared at them. 

“You can go back to your home or base. I can make it back on my own.”

Villain’s eyes didn’t waver. 

“It... it’s in walking distance if you want to walk with me, but I can’t have anyone in full super gear near my home.” 

Villain nodded and pulled off their mask, right in front of Healer. Healer blanched at the utter disregard for secret identities. But they didn’t sense any ill will or ulterior motive, so they went behind a trash can and began changing into their own civilian clothes as Villain did the same. When they stepped back out, Villain made a point of not looking at Healer. Maybe they were trying to respect their identity, not that it would help much if Villain knew where they lived. 

Healer walked home and Villain trailed behind them like some sort of underworld bodyguard. Every time Healer glanced back, Villain was scanning their surroundings with an intense alertness. Healer couldn’t blame them, they were keeping an eye out for any sign of Hero, themself. The thought of them sent their stomach into somersaults. Yet, there was something comforting about Villain trailing behind them. 

Their anxiety mixed with guilt as they remembered Hero’s words. What did it say about them that a mass murderer trailing behind them was comforting. Wait, were they putting their mom in danger by letting Villain come with them? 

But it was too late to do anything about it, now. They were already on Healer’s block. “This is it,” they said, and Villain nodded. Healer noted that Villain still wasn’t looking at their face, their eyes instead pointed at the ground with occasional flickers towards the adjacent streets. “Thank you,” Healer said, with an awkward laugh. “I was really scared back there.”

Villain nodded again, and Healer started closing the distance to their apartment. The next time they turned around, Villain was gone.