#and then powdering the dried stuff

[i-am-l-ananas]

one of those corny hallmark style romance movies about someone from the big city falling in love with someone from the countryside but make it a vampire going to increasingly ridiculous lengths to hide their nature from a cute garlic farmer

[queer-crusader]

Meet my beautiful coffee and matcha/hot drinks corner and my beautiful new son, the milk frother.

I got into the (mostly coffee based) YT channel of Morgan Eckroth recently and while I don't drink coffee all that often (and NEVER drank matcha but enjoyed matcha sticks at cons at times), I felt an urge to whimsy up my life. Just add a tiny bit of luxury, especially on those days I work from home. So for Christmas I asked for matcha powder and a milk frother (lovingly dubbed by me and my sister as a milk brother after a wonderful autocorrect/typo, resulting in the frequent use of the phrase "brothering the milk"), and now I have a wee drinks station!

Yes, it takes a wee while to make something, especially if I add matcha (you get the added steps of soaking loose the matcha whisk and whisking up a little batch rather than dumping powder in a mug if u wanna do it "right"). I also heat up my milk, for which it takes a bit of trial and error to find the right length of time in the microwave. It also took a bit of trial and error to learn how to wield the milk brother to get a well-aerated milk with a good amount of froth. But after a few days of experimentation and play over the Christmas holidays, I now make my own cappuccinos, matcha lattes, dirty matcha lattes (coffee with matcha), or as I did just now, a dirty matcha latte with added cocoa powder (yes, that works! Matcha hot cocoa is also a wonderfully comforting drink if you don't mind the caffeine!). Behold!

(I usually use a smaller mug so I didn't use enough milk and base to fill her up but she tastes wonderful!)

I've also made my own flavour infused syrup for my coffees!! We had a horrible teabag lying around no-one will ever drink with hazelnut and cocoa flavour (she tastes super chemical), so I made a simple syrup and soaked the tea in the water for that syrup. I also added some cinnamon to it. She still tastes a little like fake chemical flavour, but also due to the high amount of slightly caramelised sugar and cinnamon, like stroopwafel syrup. So it's a wonderful coffee addition that's so simple to make! And I can and will make so many more in the future!! Cinnamon flavour!! Cardamom flavour!! Peanut flavour for my snickers hot cocoa urge!! The world is at my feet and NOTHING CAN STOP ME *MANIACAL LAUGHTER*

[creativityobsessed]

It's been A Day and the brain worms have been on a murder spree since last week and sometimes I just wanna crawl in a hole and hide for a week.

[krawdad]

Bringing the first couple spheres to their final polish is revealing some stuff I'm going to need to do differently with the cores in the future

[neonvqmpire]

shouldn't you drink sage tea 😏

lmao nice one but u cant get it anywhere here

[the-best-bagel]

ciabbata is the best snacking bread

[fuckingrecipes]

Do you have advice on the art of sandwiches? I feel like i my best sandwich at home is still leagues below the worst sandwich ive bought at a restaurant

Since sandwiches are infinitely variable, I'm going to assume you're trying to make my favorite sandwich: the Turkey Club, sandwich style not sub style.

Your goal is to MAXIMIZE FLAVOR.

Thicker bread. Standard slice size for bread isn't going to cut it, here. You want thick-slice bread.

Sourdough, or French Bread not 'White' bread. You want it chewy, with a thicker crust. Hearty.

Extra-Heavy Mayo. Restaurants do not use standard mayo from the grocery. Extra-heavy mayo has a higher ratio of egg yolks, giving it a richer flavor and thicker consistency for both spreading and using in tuna or egg salad. It's also more of a warm ivory color, rather than 'white.'

Instead of yellow deli mustard, try a ground-whole-seed mustard. It has a spicier, richer profile, and a little more vinegar.

Be generous with condiments. You're making a good sandwich, not cutting calories.

SEASON your sandwich. Dust the vegetables - salt and pepper goes a long way! Dried oregano, onion powder, garlic powder are also champs. My fave is to take a spicy blend (like a fajita seasoning blend) and sprinkle generously over the mayo before adding other stuff.

Lettuce CRUNCH is important. Include the pale crispy parts in your sandwich, not just the soft green leaf parts. Use romaine and arugula, not 'iceburg' lettuce, which has next to zero flavor.

If you're using texture leafy greens like arugula, toss it in a vinaigrette before piling it onto the sandwich. The vinegar zing makes a statement.

The tomato should have a strong flavor of its own. Salt & pepper on ripe tomato is heavenly. Make sure your seasoning hits the tomato.

If you're adding onion, make sure the slices are super duper thin-sliced. Like, mandolin-thin. Translucent-thin. Red onion is king.

If you want it toasted, make sure the cheese and meat gets hot, but the greens/tomato/onion is added afterward so it stays cold and crisp.

Don't be afraid to STACK IT TALL. CRAM IT FULL! How many sandwiches from restaurants feel impossible to fit in your mouth at first glance? Most of 'em. Make it big. With the meat, especially, they often CRAM the meat in there. No single-layer of ham slices here.

It's ok to MIX MEATS. Fry up some bacon (extra crispy!) or crisp up some pepperoni and layer it with your turkey.

Once you're done, wrap your sandwich in parchment paper (not WAX paper, there's a difference), then slice in half. By wrapping it, you force all the ingredients to smush together and start blending flavors. This makes 'em all a little better and stops them from sliding around, so it's easy to get a bite with every ingredient at once, and stops the sandwich from actually falling apart.

--

Honestly, the biggest 'secrets' of sandwich making is:

MAXIMIZE FLAVOR. USE RICHLY FLAVORED INGREDIENTS.

SEASON ALL YOUR SHIT FOR MORE FLAVOR

DON'T BE AFRAID TO PILE ON MORE GOOD SHIT.

[bumpyfrog]

Daydreaming about this tofu I have marinating at home in Korean bbq sauce

[luckypunklemonade]

Temptation Greets You

| Curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back. Stiles comes across a small dosage of pollen out in the woods.

[smut MDNI 18+; sex pollen; 3k words] Stiles Stilinski

This work belongs to me, luckypunklemonade (Minte_Condition on AO3). I do not give anyone permission to distribute or share my work without consent.

He was so fucking stupid. “You guys are so fucking stupid.”

Going out into the Beacon Hills Wildlife Preserve was a regular occurrence for Stiles, but you always expected them to be at least a little bit careful. You’d have thought that he’d turn back and plan for more research when Stiles stumbled upon a freshly abandoned coven ritual ground with suspicions of black magic. No, he needed to poke around and take notes without checking their surroundings or prioritizing their own safety. Stiles picked up a mortar and pestle, underestimating the powdery substance left inside, and brought it up to look closer. The wind picked up the powder, blowing it into Stiles’s face. After the initial panic, he called to tell you. The threat of a powdered drug was skeptical as the powder was a deep blue. You rambled off a thousand excuses or hopes of what it could be. Less harmful things like spirulina or a kind of dried starch, something weird but harmless that witches use. Stiles had only inhaled a small amount, but you knew that amount of a particular drug could kill in minutes. You didn’t want to risk it.

Your car was haphazardly parked halfway off of the trail. Your coat was halfway on as you rushed over the uneven ground, imagining the grief tonight would be with a broken or sprained ankle. Stiles was sitting on a tree stump, elbows resting on his knees. You step closer to get a good look at Stiles. It had been 20 minutes. That’s how long it took for you to get to the wildlife reserve in your car. He looked fine. A little tired, but he rolled his eyes as you rotated his head in your hands. “I’m okay. I feel fine. You were probably right.”

“We have to get you to a hospital. It could be-“

“It was probably that stuff you said.”

“Spirulina.”

“Yeah, witches use stuff like that all the time.”

You tried to get a better look into his eyes, but he pulled away from your touch. You thought his pupils looked blown. You fussed over him to get him up and walking. “We’re going to the hospital.”

“No-“

You grabbed his keys from his pocket before he could finish and herded him out of the woods toward the trail. Stiles went silent, walking in front of you awkwardly. He really did look fine. 

He only started having trouble breathing when you were on the trail back to the main road. You cursed and sped up, headed to the hospital, grabbing your phone to call Melissa when his hand grabbed your wrist.

“Pull over.” 

“We’re going to the hospital, it’s—“

“Pull over.”

“No, you could be-“

“It’s not a drug, not like that. I knew it wasn’t- I shouldn’t have let you- I didn’t think it was enough.”

“Stiles, if it wasn’t a drug, what the hell was it?”

“Please just pull over.”

“It’s not fatal? Will it hurt you?”

“Please.”

The crack in his voice and the way he pushed his head against the headrest and squeezed his eyes closed shifted your attitude from panicked to empathetic. You pulled the jeep off the trail and parked it, still buzzing with anxiety as his breath came out almost violently. He breathed like that in between fragments of his thoughts.

“I did some research about the coven.”

He kept his eyes closed, and his hand gripped the Jeep’s door handle tight.

“The blue powder wasn’t a drug. It- I couldn’t tell….”

He seemed beyond embarrassed; his ears were red. “It’s an aphrodisiac derived from a mix of herbs and flowers. Pollen. The members of the coven use it for various holistic purposes but mostly in rituals to gods of fertility or prosperity. They mix it with water to create a paste and-“ 

He winces, leaning forward and harshly thumping his head against the dash and resting it there. You reach forward out of pity. 

“Please don’t.” He takes a deep breath and continues, “They make markings, they…fuck, whatever. You need to- I should…” 

He doesn’t finish his sentence. He opens the Jeep door and stumbles out. You yell his name, but he turns around. “Just leave the woods for a few hours. Come back at dusk. I should be better.” 

“Stiles, if it’s an aphrodisiac, why is it hurting you?”

“This- God, it’s not- aphrodisiac is a simplification; if I don’t get some sort of…of release, it’s gonna keep hurting. It’s gonna get worse. I’m not gonna be in my right mind. I need you to just go home and come back in a few hours, okay?”

“I’m not gonna leave you out here, hurting in the cold woods for a few hours, Stiles.”

Stiles actually whimpers. It’s like the sound of you saying his name hurts. Or something else. 

“I won’t be able to think straight, just drive. I’ll be okay. Don’t call anyone. Don’t tell Scott or Isaac. I’ll figure it out. Just go.” The words are starting to seem taxing, hard even to say. He begins to walk into the trees. You think about how hard it’ll be to find him in the huge wildlife preserve. For a minute, you consider leaving him. He’s done the research; he’s been out in these woods alone before and gotten home okay, but he wasn’t under the influence of anything then.

You get out of the Jeep and walk around to the passenger side, where he had walked off the trail. As soon as he hears the door shut, he turns, the sight of you out of the vehicle making him throw his head back in frustration. He yells, and it stops you in your tracks. “Get back in the Jeep, just get back in the fucking Jeep!”

And he’s walking toward you. He’s almost scary, his voice a little unrecognizable in such a low register. You do; you get back in and yelp a little as he reaches the passenger door. He presses his palm to it, almost hitting the metal. He looks utterly desperate, upset, frustrated, scared, even. “Please, just…just stay inside. Just..”

Stiles leans his forehead against the door, shoulders heaving up and down. His pleas fade. Before they become silent, though, his tone shifts from “Please stay inside” to “Please help me.” He mutters softly, no longer even speaking to himself and, if you weren’t listening hard enough, to no one. “I need..” he says breathily, pathetically. 

He moves to lean against the front bumper, resting his forehead against the cold metal. You crank the window down just slightly and speak in a small voice, “Stiles?” 

He doesn’t move. He just keeps sucking in air and huffing it out. You’re worried now. It’s not what you thought. He looked like he couldn’t breathe, and his fists were clenched, his head buried in his arms on the cold hood of his Jeep. 

“It’s cold, Stiles. I can’t leave you, just…just get in, okay?”

“I can’t- not you.”

“What? Stiles, if you need help, we can figure it out. I’ll find a witch or something, just-“

“You can’t help me. The only thing…”

You remember his words. He needs some kind of release, aphrodisiac, understatement, et cetera. “Stiles. Let me help you figure this out. I understand. Please get back in the Jeep.” 

And then, you unlock the vehicle and pop the door open. It swings wide, and he looks up. He looks a little scared, a little worried. His eyebrows are knitted together painfully, his shoulders heaving up and down, hot breath leaving his airways visibly in the cold. Stiles shakes his head.

“I understand. Let me…let me help. I can-“

He’s slowly walking around the door, hands still in clenched fists and breath labored. “I can’t.”

“It’s okay, I can help. I know what you need, and I know it hurts. Just let me help you.”

“Not you…Not like this.”

“Come here.”

His eyes flutter, and he takes a few steps toward the car, toward you. Your hand touches his shoulder, and he whimpers. His hands moved quickly, grabbing the seat lever and pulling it back. The back of the seat fell, lying flat, catching your attention until you looked back at Stiles. He was hefting himself up into the Jeep toward you. You didn’t realize he was herding you into the back until you were sitting on the reclined back of the passenger seat. His arms, after reaching to shut the door, spanned wide. One hand was on the driver's seat headrest, the other bracing himself against the interior. It made him look bigger. He looked hesitant. “You don’t know what you’re doing…”

“It’s okay. I can…help. I can help.” Your hand reached up to bring his down from the headrest.

“I can’t…not to you.”

“Well, I’m not leaving you, and I want to help.”

His eyes scanned the Jeep, taking in the cramped space. His eyes seemed unfocused, the effects worsening. He didn’t speak as he pushed your shoulders down, cradling your head as you lowered. He planted his knees on the sides of the seat, hooked his arms around your thighs, and pulled you down by your hips. He looked desperately up at you, trying to convey an ask but failing and giving you the most pleading look you’d ever seen. You breathlessly nodded, and he dramatically dropped his head onto your chest in relief. His hands immediately gripped your hips, but they were restless and curious, and needy. He watched as his own hand relaxed and kneaded the denim-trapped skin of your hips as if he didn’t know what his perverted hands would do next. His other palm leveled, and his fingers parted, relaxed from fists, and moved slowly, experimentally up your ribcage under your shirt. The entire time, his face looked guilty—upset, even.

“I should’a brought you.” His voice is distracted, but he means it. “You’re so careful.” His eyes are glued to the way his hands line your curves, up and down, but his words are genuine. When his short-lived need to just touch you was gone, he closed his eyes in shame. He needed more. 

He presses himself against you, eyes hardening in intense and conflicted emotions, and his hands squeezing and grabbing at you mindlessly. It would be pathetic if he weren’t so completely driven. He still wasn’t saying much, kneeling between your legs as he bent them at the knees and pushed them up and out wide to make room for himself. Once he does, he’s pressed into you again. You think the warmth between you is only something you notice, but Stiles groans and rests his forehead back against your chest again, even if it takes some craning of his neck downward. His forehead was burning up, and the sheen of sweat, while thin, made him almost glow in the early-setting winter sun. You can feel him hardening in his jeans. It was impossible to ignore, especially when he started rocking against you.

His hands retreated from your hip, from the seat beneath you, holding him up, to unzip his jeans. His mind is foggy, you can tell because his hands shake and struggle between his zipper and yours, not knowing which to focus on first. You softly reach down and unzip his jeans. His hands pause, and you look up, making debilitating eye contact, and you think he might pass out. He’s sweating, shaking, silent. All things your Stiles isn’t usually—or at least not all at once. Of course, he’s never seen you like this, conversely. Underneath him and willing to let him, rather, wanting him to touch you. 

You jumped when he scrambled to get your jeans undone and yanked down—or up. Up your legs in your position. Everything about this made Stiles want to whine. You, how close you are, how long he’s wanted you, the position he’s got you in, what you’re gonna let him do, where you’re letting him do it. In his Jeep, out in the woods off a secluded trail. He wanted to speak, to make this perfect like he wanted. How he imagined when he was in his room mumbling your name and pumping his hand as if it was yours. But he was so damn impatient and it hurt and you were so willing. He spoke softly and barely intelligibly as he pulled his jeans and boxers down just enough and your underwear to the side, “M’gonna make it up to you, ‘kay? When I don’t need it so bad, I’ll make it good.”

You couldn’t respond before he’s got his tip pressed against you, and he’s pushing forward. It’s too late to stop him to ask for the mercy of preparation or caution and the sound you let out is proof. It’s an open-mouthed, guttural gasp as if he knocked the wind out of you. He stops once he can feel you completely envelop him, and he almost collapses on top of you. He felt a sense of relief, a scratch to the itch of the substance, but he could feel the discomfort of it saturating again. Two times worse now that the release was wrapped warmly around him. He was still, though. He stopped as soon as you made a noise of pain, even though his hips twitched. He looked up after telling himself that if you looked the least bit upset when your eyes found him, he’d stop even if it killed him.

But before he could find your pretty eyes, you clenched around him. It was an encouragement. More so torture when he was so sensitive. He moaned and resorted to broken rambles, some of which were not even audible. “Please-‘

You told him to move and he didn’t rock back as you had expected, only forward more, burying himself fully into you. His breath fanned across your ear as he was so close on top of you, the sound of his breathing laced with whines and moans as you satisfied the twinge in his stomach. Then, he set a slow pace. Somewhere, his need to be close intensified, and he looped his arm around your head, ushering your face softly into his shoulder as he pushed his hips into yours, trying not to focus on how quickly the release would come if he didn’t care about hurting you. Eventually, he couldn’t stop himself from speeding up, his other hand holding your hip down. The hand cradling your head held you tighter, more secure as if you’d break. You made small noises that punctuated his thrusts, each of them gripping his conscience as harder than he should be handling you. 

“I’m so sorry,” He choked out against your hair. “Feels so fucking good, I’m sorry.”

He was unsure of how much pain he was causing. All he could tell was you were taking away his pain. You just moaned into his shoulder as he sped up against his better judgment.

”I was so irresponsible, I was so stupid, I’m sorry-“ He moaned as he drove himself deeper. It matched the one you breathed out in response as well. 

He couldn’t be sure at first, but he thought he felt you press your lips against the fabric stretched across his shoulder. As he felt the vibration from your lips as you strained out another moan, he was certain. The small act being something he was too impatient and hazy to do, but something he wanted to give you made him squeeze his eyes shut, his climax on the horizon. Chasing harder, his words were almost cries, “Thank you.’

”For letting me do this- thank you.” He moved his head so he wasn’t facing away from you and began sucking messy kisses into your neck. They were somewhat controlled, but he needed to communicate his gratitude in a way that wouldn’t betray how unintelligible his thoughts were.

“I’ll be more careful. I’m so sorry, I’m- Thank you. Fuck-“ he’s cut off as you clench around him again. He doesn’t know why, but you do. The sounds of his whines sent you nearer and nearer to your ruin. In your ear, mixed with his moans and utterly desperate. Amplified by his need from the pollen.

His breathing stuttered in time with his hips, and his fingers tightened in your hair. He frantically pulled himself away from you, pulling out. The last rational decision he could make before tipping over the edge. When he came, his whole body tensed, and he let out a breathy whine. He breathed heavily and desperately in your ear, whining out, “Thank you.” Due to the amount of the pollen he’d consumed, he felt satisfied. Relieved. It felt as if he’d been waiting weeks for it. His arm gave out, and he laid himself on top of your chest.

“Thank you,” He pressed a long kiss to your collarbone, lazily letting his head fall down. “I’m so sorry, I should’ve-“

He’s too tired. Presumably crashing hard from the powder. Your hand comes up to his hair, gently running your nails over the shorter hair at the nape of his neck. “Mh- Stiles, look up at me.” 

Your focus was his eyes, but it was too dark to see. He sits up at your command and pulls his jeans up quickly, turning to help you. He pushes your hands away, tugging your pants up and buttoning them back, his hands gentle. 

He’s crying. You hop down from the jeep. The sun had set, and the temperature quickly dropped. You awkwardly get out, turning back with your phone flashlight to check on him, and he’s silently crying. You gently tilt his head toward you, focused on his health first. Once you’ve made sure his eyes look fine, you hold his head to look at you without the light. “Hey.” 

He looks down, shaking his head. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know.”

“But I did, as soon as I-“

“Well, it happened, okay? How do you feel?” Your hands brush tears away from his eyes.

He describes how he feels, coming down from the sort of ‘high.’ His eyes fill with new tears but you lean forward to his confused surprise and kiss him, assuring him with a new, soft tone of voice. “I’m glad it happened.”

[hazelfoureyes]

Hi there! I hope you’re doing well!

I was hoping to send a request. Do with it what you will…but I had the scenario in my head of reader going on dates and always wearing a lot of makeup. (Nothing against makeup)

Anyway, she and Alastor are friends, although Alastor always thinks the people reader dates are not worthy of her. After this particular date that was maybe a 2nd or 3rd date, she comes home in tears. While he’s comforting her he begins to tenderly wash her face. Eventually wiping off all the makeup and he simply says “There you are.”

I love the idea of Alastor believing that a woman doesn’t need makeup to be beautiful.

Thank you! ❤️❤️

I only began wearing make up like, last month, so I’m purely using info from watching the Welsh twins. personally I like to think Alastor would respect a person taking the effort to express themselves with make up, and also appreciate people who can feel no pressure to do so. There’s something very attractive about people who do things purely for their own enjoyment. Assuming it’s not like—- watching porn in the bus or killing snakes or stuff like that. Anyway what was I supposed to be doing aga-

Alastor x GN! Reader

「warnings/promises: not an ounce of smut, he may love you in any sense of the word, but he does love you dearly, Alastor knows how to remove make up because he likes to sneak up and scare Charlie when she’s getting ready for bed and has had many a product thrown at this head」

It was normally the mornings when he’d see you after your dates, and you’d spill the tea about the good and the bad. It was fun for him, drama was always best enjoyed from a distance.

There was no distance great enough that could make him miss you as you slunk into the hotel quietly, head down and turned away purposefully. Your arms were straight to your sides and balled into fists, back stiff as a board as you power walked through the lobby. How unlike you in every way.

He waited a beat until he was confident you’d made it to your room before following.

You considered not letting him in, but you knew he would come in if he really wanted to. Why pretend?

There was no point either in hiding your makeup streaked face. He clearly knew something was wrong, why else would he have come to your room.

“It went badly?” He asked somewhat rhetorically, closing the door behind him softly. “You know, I could always eat them. Avoid awkward run-ins downtown.”

A laugh, half hearted and more a glorified exhale than anything else.

Alastor came to your bed and offered you both hands. Setting yours in his, he guided you to the bathroom. Odd, a room you’d definitely not shared before, but you didn’t question it.

There was something deeply soothing about the way he moved around you as he led you around your own space. After lifting you onto the counter, he leaned past you to fiddle with something.

You smiled genuinely as you watched him rub your make up removing cleanser between his large hands. His palms were warm on your cheeks, tears both fresh and dried were mixed with the layers of setting spray, powder, cream, and lotion. Closing your eyes was the natural thing to do, but you couldn’t have kept them open if you had wanted to. Your brain was going fuzzy, clashing with the nauseous pain in your gut.

“As much as I adore the way you jazz up your temple, I’m quite fond of your natural features.” His voice seemed so close to you in the darkness. A hummed response was all you could muster.

The sound of running water, a few cabinets opening and closing, and then the soothing warmth of a hot and sopping face towel sliding down your cheeks.

“Another dud.” Alastor announced, the word ‘dud’ popped with an annoyed static. Even with your eyes shut, they stung with newly summoned tears. “The pain of realizing someone is not for you on a third date is much more tolerable than on the third year.” His large thumbs wiped away errant tears and liquified eyeshadow.

“Not to discount your pain!” You heard the facial cleanser lathering between his palms before he began to cover your face in gentle soap. “Just, well, I’d hate to see you cry too long over nothing and no one.”

A nod from you.

His careful fingers rubbed the suds into your skin gently, sharp nails barely grazing you. “I still don’t see how my idea was discounted so quickly!”

He could see your eyes roll behind your eyelids as you ground out, “Alastor I can’t make people be interviewed by an overlord to take me out.”

“I prefer the word interrogate.”

“I don’t!”

He tsk’d, wiping the soap away with wet hands and a damp cloth. “You sure are making your dating life all about you.” His hands left you and as your cheeks began to cool you opened your eyes.

Alastor was beaming down at you. You stayed still and let his finger follow the length of your nose that you cleverly reshaped with your skills,

his palms ran over the redness of your cheeks you calmed and covered before every outing,

his claws brushed over freckles reassuringly,

his eyes settled on your two tone lips,

and he purred happily at the sight,

“There you are.”

⋅˚₊‧ ଳ⋆Masterlist.ೃ࿔*:･

˖ ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖

@eris-norwega @reath-solia @catticora , @angelicribbons , @xalygatorx

@cxrsedwxrlds , @nonetheartist , @tsunaki , @janchei , @moonmark98

, @readergirlstuff , @berry-demon , @chirimeimei , @fairyv-ice , @olive-frog ,

@thonethatflies620 , @tiredkiwiii , @ilikemyteawithmilk , @whateverlololo , @psipies

@howabouticallyou , @roxxie-wolf , @fizzled-phoenix , @star-kujo-platinum

, @a-case-of-attachment, @multifandomfanatic02 @watereddownmilk , @bontensbabygirl @smoky000

@hoebihoeshi , @pansexual-opera-house , @polytheatrix , @lorddiabigmommymilkers , @backinthefkingbuildingagain

@harley2223-blog , @poinappel , @midnightnoiserose , @spookieroz , @missmidorima ,

@ivebeenthearchersstuff , @downbadforfictionalppl , @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx , @sleepylittledemon , @aether-th3-enby

@dontfuckbutimfab @breathlessaura , @aperfectidiot , @certainlygay , @jth12

[keepthedelta]

drivers ranked based on how nice i think they smell

lewis - easily smells the best on the grid. this man uses a professional perfumer to custom mix scents to match and enhance his natural body scent depending on the time, place and activity

zhou - has explored every designer perfume/cologne on the market and does full day tests to see how the scent develops over time. varies scent depending on outfit and occasion

lance - doesn't care about cologne at all. his sister buys him a very expensive one every year and he just wears that. it's actually very pleasant and not at all overpowering. he does not know what it's called

yuki - simple but effective. doesn't put a lot of effort into it but smells great anyway. smells great when cooking too

george - has an extensive bathing and skincare regime. matches his scents throughout these regimes, building from body wash to powder to perfume

carlos - insists that he only uses unscented soap in the shower (also functions as his shampoo/conditioner) and somehow smells great. on special occasions puts on a hideously expensive cologne supposed to smell like volcanic ash

alex - lily is not letting this man out of the house smelling bad and we all know it. when she's not around he borrows george's stuff

liam - uses manly™ pine scented body wash but in the way butch lesbians do

charles - likes to mix designer scents. sometimes it works, sometimes it really really doesn't. when his girlfriend is out of town he gets naked and puts her perfume on. he secretly really likes it

fernando - most of the time has good taste. on occasion douses himself in wolf urine to incite fear in his enemies

hulk, kmag, checo - varying degrees of fine/have wives with certain levels of expectation

max - he smells fine but there's just a hint of red bull in the air around him

valtteri - spends a lot of time naked and therefore slathered in sun cream. if you like the smell of sun cream he's the one for you

esteban - the hair gel is a bit much but otherwise fine. on occasion the smell of comic book ink is too strong

franco - just the right amount of sweat and alcohol and mid priced cologne to appeal to hot milfs in his area. they let him use their expensive bodywash the morning after

oscar - has dried his clothes with an oven

pierre - he was aiming for the carlos smoky cologne. he was unsuccessful

lando - thinks lynx africa is an exotic scent. genuinely enjoys the smell of mcdonalds. bought expensive cologne and sprayed it directly on his crotch

[stealingyourbones]

Happy very early Halloween have a dp idea that won't leave me alone. I also bring along the wonderfully preserved bones of the many whales that fall into the deep dark of the ocean to never be seen again as an offering.

Idea:

Playing around with the blood blossoms cause illness and even perma death in ghosts from canon; as he's effected by LIVE blood blossoms because of his halfa status interacting with the pollen, when he goes to university Danny decides to get Sam and/or Tucker to press/dry some blossoms for him and he puts them in EVERYTHING. They act as a deterrent for ghosts who want to try and bother him at university because the ghost boy is so powerful he can resist the flowers now!?

I'm thinking he commissions one of those water bottles where the glass/plastic has stuff inside of the walls of the bottle and its just pressed blood blossoms but most of the ghosts think he's drinking blood blossom infused water.

Oh my god YES!

I also propose that Danny wears one of those necklaces that has a tiny pressed flower inside but it’s a dried bud of a blood blossom.

You could even grind the dried blossoms into a fine powder and incorporate it into various items like hair gel, nail polish, blush, eye shadow, or even hair dye.

With many heroes having died before and have since been revived by unconventional means, how do blood blossoms effect them?

[jiraisupportgroup]

♡ Body & Face Care Tips (for when showering is too much) ♡

Showering is hard sometimes for multiple reasons T-T

But I made a post abt hair care sans-shower so now we gotta talk about body care!! Unfortunately I don’t have as many tips as I did for the hair care one - but on the bright side it’s a little simpler ♡

~ Body Care ~

♡ Baby wipes are your best friend. Go through & wipe down every part of your body. After you hit big target areas (armpits, feet, genitals) switch to a new baby wipe. You can also get biiiiiiig ones from CVS or Walmart sometimes. Look into bathing cloths - they’re usually really big and antibacterial so they’re awesome to have on hand.

♡ If you don’t have baby wipes or bathing cloths, or just don’t want to spend the money on them, use a wet washcloth. You can use a little bit of soap on it if you need, just be sure to wipe down with just water afterwards to avoid soap residue on your skin - that can make you very itchy. I usually recommend baby soap because if you miss any it tends to be less itchy once it dries.

♡ You can also use a body sponge for this (a sponge NOT a loofa, loofas hold on to too much soap so it’s hard to use them to get excess soap off later). You also don’t really have to be at a sink! You can use just a bowl of water so you can do this anywhere. ^-^

♡ Baby powder is really good for hot months, patting a little baby powder onto high-sweat areas & joints can help prevent chafing and keep you dry & fresh through the day. You can also use a little bit of baby powder in your shoes to freshen them up, same for clothes and bedsheets - baby powder is just kind of awesome.

♡ Lotion is amazing for rehydrating skin & smelling fresh after a good wipe-down. I’m obsessed with the baby lotions because they’re not too thick so texturally it doesn’t feel as sticky.

♡ Legs & armpits can be shaved outside of the shower if you want to. Wet your legs, use conditioner or a shaving cream, and shave. Rinse off your razor frequently & make sure you wipe down the area with a wet washcloth afterwards to make sure there is no soap residue. I’ve done this on the couch before I’m not even going to lie. (You also totally don’t have to shave, absolutely 0 shame it’s not like a required thing at all, this is more so of a “if you want to” kind of thing.)

~ Face Care ~

♡ Makeup remover wipes are amazing I love them. On days where washing my face is too much I use a makeup removing wipe (even if I’m not wearing makeup) to get any oils etc off, and then follow up with a baby wipe. Works great.

♡ Micellar water is also amazing. You can use a little washcloth or pad to wipe down your face (no rinsing required) or squirt some into your hands, wipe down your face, then rinse with water. Much lighter than soap so sometimes if you’re not feeling up to the whole face washing thing, this can feel a bit less taxing.

♡ Don’t worry about all the extra stuff. If you have the energy for all the creams and serums and toners and spot treatments that’s amazing but if you don’t, just don’t do it. I promise your skin is not going to freak out if you skip out on some serums. Wash face -> moisturize -> and you should be good to go. Honestly depending on your skin type & what face wash you’re using you may not even need moisturizer either.

~ Make the Shower More Bearable ~

♡ Shower while sitting down. I bought a little kid’s plastic stool from Walmart for like $7 & it works wonders for the days where I’m too exhausted to shower.

♡ Use a shower cap so you can just focus on cleaning your body.

♡ Use a soap you enjoy the scent and texture of, switching up soap scents can make things feel new and less taxing too. If you want, use a 3-in-1 shampoo conditioner body wash combo, if it makes the process easier, just do it ♡ whatever you can do to make things easier.

♡ Shower with the lights off. Do not shave if you’re showering with the lights off. But sometimes if the idea of looking too closely at your body is too much, showering with the lights off can help a little bit. Alternatively, covering the mirror with a towel or sheet can help as well.

I’m sure there’s more than this but this is just what I usually do to keep things fresh when I don’t have the energy to shower T-T

Feel free to drop more tips in the comments / ask box if you have any! 🤍🤍🤍

[kedreeva]

My mom ditched several pounds of tomatoes from her garden on me, so I did the only sensible thing and made fresh pasta sauce from scratch. I feel like I should actually plant a garden and grow some goddamn tomatoes because this shit is about a thousand times more flavorful than what I've been eating all my life.

I blanched the tomatoes (bring water to boil, remove stem core from tomato, put in boiling water for like 30 seconds, transfer to cold water, skin basically falls off), and put them into a food processor with olive oil, fresh basil, salt, and a few garlic cloves, then moved that to a sauce pan to reduce with mushrooms and red wine, and I ended up adding some dried thyme, sugar, garlic and onion powders, smoked paprika powder, some grated parmesan, and a tiny smidge of baking soda. If I had had any oregano I would have added that, but I didn't.

Anyway I'm going to use this tonight with leftover rotisserie chicken shredded up with some elbow macaroni and mozzarella cheese and stuff.

[kcrossvine-art]

Heya folks! Its been a bit, food insecurity is a bitch, but today on the quest of cooking our way through Lord of the Rings we're gonna be making a dish exclusively mentioned in the 2007 MMO-

We will be making a Rohan Pasty! 

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes into a Rohans Pasty?” YOU MIGHT ASKBasics. Meat n potatoes of your meat-in-dough food. .

All-purpose flour

Salt

Baking powder

Vegetable oil

Olive oil

Ground beef

Garlic salt

Ground cumin

Chili powder

Dried oregano

Waxy potato

Garlic

White onion

Egg

"A delicious local pastry filled with beef and potatoes."- LOTRO Rohan is a kingdom of humans in middle-earth, and the description point towards a cornish pasty (yes, pasty not pastry). Oddly enough the image is more of an empanada but you win some you lose some. This heritage informs much of the shape and ingredients of this dish, however we're opting to cook most of the ingredients before adding them in, contrary to going in raw as a cornish pasty calls for. I chose to deviate here because cooking beforehand allows more seasoning to be crammed in. The english hate seasoning.

AND, “what does a Rohans Pasty taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

Tastes like the best pot pie youve had, less soggy

Excellent for an after-rugby/martial arts/soccer dinner

The potatoes are foundational

Despite needing the least work

Pasta salad (cucumber, olives, pepperocini) would pair well as a side

And would also pair well with beer

This meal bears the gold star sticker of not having any major issues! Hooray! Maybe its increased comfortability in the kitchen, or maybe its because of how very simple this one is. Chopped roasted bell pepper might be good in the filling in the future.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Get the dough ready ahead of time- its mentioned in the recipe below but i also wanted to say a foreword here that it needs to sit in the fridge for a few hours. Just so ya dont get everything out and realise itd take too long for dinner tonight. Speaking of dough, i feel like it could have more flavor added to it. Its bland and although its not part of the tradition of the meal its based off of, cornish meat pasty, it might be nice to add some spices like cumin or black pepper to the flour. 

The meal reheats perfect- wrap in papertowl and put it in the microwave for 30 seconds per pasty.

When picking your potatoes make sure theyre "new" potatoes (baby ones) or whichever potato with the least amount of starch you can get. Its important for it to cook inside the pasty that it not have too much lest it get Mushy Bad.

Another thing about its real-life inspo; Cornish pastys were workers food, stuff you could carry into the mines, stuff thatd reheat well. You could hold the crust with your dirty hands and throw it away once you ate the rest. I always feel partial to these foods. Although I'd still eat the dirty crust.

This recipe earns a solid 8/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) 

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Dough Ingredients:

370g all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon baking powder

74g vegetable oil

240g warm water

Filling Ingredients:

2 tablespoons(ish) olive oil

1 pound ground beef

2 tablespoons tomato paste

Garlic salt to taste

Ground cumin to taste

Chili powder to taste

Dried oregano to taste

5 cloves garlic, minced

1 white onion, diced

Method:

Combine flour, salt and baking powder.

Add oil and water into mixer with dough hook running at medium speed. Mix for 1 minute, stopping several times to scrape the sides of the bowl.

When mixture comes together and begins to form a ball, decrease mixing speed to low. Continue to mix just until dough is smooth.

Take the dough ball, safely wrap it, and transfer to fridge. Let sit for at minimum 2 hours.

For the meat, get a large skillet, and add some olive oil over medium heat. Add the ground beef and garlic salt, cook until the beef is cooked completely.

Drain the beef and set aside.

In the same pan, add the garlic, onions, cumin, chili powder, oregano, and salt.

Cook until the onions are softened but not brown, 10 to 15 minutes. Re-add the beef and cook over low heat for about 5 more minutes.

Back to the dough, transfer dough from fridge to well-floured work surface. Roll into log and divide into 10 equal portions. 

Preheat oven to 350f.

Form each piece into a ball and flatten each with a rolling pin.

Add a layer of diced potatos down the middle of the pastys. Add the meat filling to each. Fold the sides of the dough up to seal on top in the middle.

Gently turn the pasty on its side and crimp the edge, alternating a braid pattern. Use knife to cut an "X" shaped slit in the top. Repeat for each pasty.

Place the pastys on a greased baking sheet. Lightly coat each pasty with an eggwash using a basting brush.

Cook for about 50 minutes, or until golden brown, and let cool!

[mactiir]

ranking baldur's gate characters by how i think they smell

#9) Minthara. Because she’s a corpse, next question.

#8) Lae'zel. You know this woman has never bathed. Washing is for the weak, is'tik. She says this is because needs her musk to attract mates but mostly it's cuz Gith education doesn't exactly make time for personal hygiene. Once it got so bad that Tav dragged the whole party through a chest-deep stream and stood there for 20 minutes to take a "breather" while Laezel stared daggers at them the whole time.

#7) Karlach. I want Karlach to smell nice so badly, and Karlach probably wants Karlach to smell nice too, but you know this woman smells like brimstone and engine exhaust and sweat. On good days she smells like the fine char you get on burgers on a summer day. On bad days she smells like a truck stop at peak hours, and the truck stop is also on fire. She's not happy about this either.

#6) Gale. Gale tries to keep himself groomed, he really does. But he looks like he is perpetually just a tiny bit smelly. Like he hyperfocused on a book slightly too hard for slightly too long and as a result he forgot to shower for a week. He acts like he bedded Mystra because of his towering intellect but really it's cuz gods don't have human senses of smell. His nightshirt looks velvet, too, and you KNOW it can't be easy to get smells out of that shit without a washer. He is one of those poor guys who is cursed to always stink a little bit no matter how much he showers. When Tav confronts him about this he decides, on the spot, that deodorant is for anti-intellectuals, actually, which he wouldn't have expected Tav to know but it's okay, we can't all be enlightened.

#5) Minsc. He doesn't reek exactly, but you know he's 100% man musk, hamster bedding, and butt-kicking

Tied for #5) Jaheira. You know 100 years of living in forests and adventuring with Minsc has endowed her with exactly the same level of manly perfume as Minsc (except with notes of cedarwood).

#4) Wyll. He used to be the best-smelling until Mizora pulled him through every level of hell in rapid succession, and now he smells a little bit like brimstone all the time. He sometimes rubs fragrant herbs on his horns to counteract it, which doesn't get rid of the smell, really, but it gives his smell an interesting dimension. Otherwise, he has enough experience with adventuring, and is well-bred enough, that him and his things are usually well-groomed (and also because his dad was a freak about it).

#3) Shadowheart. This woman puts on tragic makeup every morning and changes her hair to reflect her religion. Appearances are EVERYTHING (especially when it comes to keeping secrets). Shadowheart smells exactly like she thinks she needs to smell to be religiously pleasing to her goddess and/or coMplEtE thE mIsSioN. She does get anxious sweats though, which are very distinctive if it's been a long day of adventuring. She never admits this, though. Ever.

#2) Astarion. Okay, so, sometimes, he smells just the teensiest, tiniest bit like dried blood. But mostly, he smells like baby powder and potpourri. It is a waste of good fashion sense and his pretty face to go about stinking like a beggar. (He does go through a brief 'Cazador can't tell ME what to do' phase where he stops bathing for a day, but he grosses himself out so much that he resumes his normal routime before anyone notices.)

#1) Halsin. You'd expect him to stink, with his whole smelly-hippy free-love vibe, but nah. The man smells heavenly. He spends all his time frolicking through fragrant herbs and lounging in scented hot springs with whomever strikes his fancy. He probably has a whole ass medicine cabinet full of stuff he uses to freshen up. His breath probably smells like mint and his hair like cedar. He probably puts coconut oil or smth in his hair. He knows how to smell good as literally any animal in the realms. Wanna know why? Dogs have a sense of smell several thousand times better than people. I bet bears do, too. You do Not Fuck As A Bear without understanding not only how to WASH your ass, but also perfume it. Halsin also knows: thou shalt not give yeast infections. And if you got bear dick, that means HYGIENE. It's a point of pride for him, actually.

BONUS: WITHERS. Withers smells like nothing. Like, freakishly, unsettlingly like nothing. Like, you expect him to smell like dust or pitch or smth. Nope. He's a black hole of smell. You come near him and if you ask, he resets your entire hygiene routine for 100 gold and leaves you smelling like roses.