#and then my new one is Mark at the hotel pool

[laomelettedufromage]

I like to think I have a below to average amount of weird but otherwise harmless old men interactions for a 5’3 female presenting person but I’ve been told multiple times that that is not the case…

[levilxvr]

here’s my belated vday levi smut :) was busy this week and didn’t have time to finish it HSJFD

cw: nsfw, breeding, fem!reader

valentine’s day is one of many special days marked out on levi’s calendar. Every year he books a room at one of those luxurious hotels in the city so that you and him can enjoy a special night in the comfort of the cool, silky sheets.

As cliche as it sounds, levi loves sprinkling rose petals in the shape of a heart on the bed- for you to admire before the careful arrangement gets destroyed minutes later.. Because how can he resist himself when that pretty velvet lace hugs your figure so perfectly?

He was honestly nervous about purchasing it, worried you wouldn’t like it or the size might be off. He was definitely overthinking, though. When you slipped out of the bathroom wearing only the set he gave you his jaw dropped. Then he’s all over you in seconds, feeling you up and down as his heartbeat speeds up and his cheeks grow warm. You can barely resist his featherlight touches, fiddling with the clip of your bra as the back of your knees hit the mattress.

Levi instantly dives down, lips locking with yours as he kisses you passionately before reaching down to your lower region. Without warning he yanks delicate fabric to the side, a small spot of wetness pooled in the centre. you can feel the thin material rip slightly and wince.

“levi, be gentle!”

“don’t care, I’ll get a new one.” His dark hair drapes over his forehead as he bends down and takes one of your breasts in his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue around your nipple as his skilled fingers tease your clit. Your back arches as a ripple of pleasure runs through your body, breathing in the smell of levi’s citrusy cologne and a hint of rose. You can make out the sharp lines of his face in the soft glow of the candles, and hear his ragged breaths as he feels your walls clench around his fingers tightly.

His movements aren’t rushed- he plans to take his own sweet time making you feel good, since he’s got the entire night to show how much he loves you. Just before you cum he slips his fingers out and smirks, dragging your release away as you beg him to continue.

“ssh.. patience.” levi leans down and kisses your cheek tenderly, hands supporting himself on either side of your head as he guides his cock past your folds. His spongy tip stretches you out as he buries himself balls deep inside you, filling you up so nicely you can practically feel him throbbing. You’re so tight and wet for him and only him, and knowing he’s the only one that makes you feel this way gets him even more hot and restless.

“fuck…I love you so much, look at how well you’re taking me darling, you’re doing so good.” His low voice sends a shiver down your spine as he grips your legs and throw them over his shoulders. Then you feel a soft, cold pillow under your hips as he tucks it there so he can go deeper, angling himself perfectly against your g spot as he picks up the pace. You glance up and down his figure and notice the sheen of sweat coating his pale skin, his swollen lips parted as small moans and pants escape.

“I’m.. close, so so close… where do you want it?”

“inside.”

He doesn’t hesitate, pelvis slamming against yours as he stills and cums so hard you can feel it coating your insides.

“god..” he mumbles, catching his breath as he slowly lowers himself onto you. “can we go again?”

“sure, we’ve got all night.”

[sevenop]

Billie Eilish x Fem!reader: But I already have love in LA

A/n: 5,692 milli is the distance between calm nighttime Paris and sweltering Los Angeles, which almost makes Eilish howl like a wolf. A Paris promo in honor of the album mercilessly separates the two of you on an important date, but you find a way out.

Billie's point of view. 'Cause I like it.

"The person you are trying to reach is currently unavailable, please call back later," is the peremptory verdict unchanged over these endless eight hours, echoing coldly from a woman's voice on the other side of the handset. Not the voice I want to hear so much, not the timbre that makes my heart flutter so incredibly, as if it were your most expensive wind-up toy. Not your voice, absolutely not. You don't get in touch for such an ungodly long time, and I just diligently shut up the feeling of anxiety devouring from within throughout the day: a dark woolly monster grins hungrily with its wide mouth, loudly clicking its massive, fanged jaw. Each click is a new, painstakingly detailed picture in my head, causing hot anxiety. What if you're really lying helplessly on the hot as hell asphalt of LA, caught under the spiked wheels that tried to slow down with a soul-shattering screech? I know how hurried you are. What if you turned into a disadvantaged area, taking a shortcut, and now your lifeless body is lying in the nearest ditch, turning paler and colder by the minute? What if you just stopped breathing in your sleep for no reason?...

I take a deep breath, and the chains behind the monster immediately tighten with the deafening clang of massive links: it leaps, wanting to grab at me with its clawed paws, to pull me into the viscous pools of panic, but it still can't reach me. With a menacing guttural growl, its fangs gleam faintly in the semi-darkness, covered in viscous saliva. It's actually easier to contain my anxiety when my head is full of thoughts about the shoot, about the phrases I have to elegantly slip into the interviewers, turning their question marks into confident dots. It's easier when you're surrounded by a horde of people: security, staff, family. But when I'm in the silence of an insanely expensive French hotel, drowning in the uncompromising gloss of the surroundings, still perfectly styled and dressed in expensive dark clothes, coming straight from the shoot, nervous and clutching my phone in my hands with hope - it all becomes so impossible.

I'm dialing twelve digits again, just a little more and I'll be able to dial your number blind. "The person you are trying to reach is currently unavailable, please call back later." I lean back noisily on the cold silk of the sheets while that toothy, infinitely dark ball of anxiety laughs snidely. I check all the messengers, only to fling my phone away in a brief flash of anger somewhere upward, toward the ruched beige pillows: you still haven't been online in eleven hours, my messages unanswered. Fuck! It's becoming more and more like Jenga, where with each passing hour I take one wooden brick out of the structure and put it on top, making it even more rickety than before. Indeed, something has definitely happened, you couldn't just disappear from everyone's radar for no good reason, especially when today is our little celebration of a month-long relationship. There's five thousand six hundred and ninety-two miles between us, and the silence on the wire makes me want to howl. God, I'm going to go crazy...

Beep! It sounded like someone had thrown a grenade with the pin pulled right under the bed. I reacted immediately, but on the desplay is just a message from Fin in an endless string of unnecessary things. Well, better than nothing. Better than drowning in madness alone.

"Are you asleep?"

"No." How the fuck can I, bro?

"She still hasn't responded?"

"No."

The three dots bounce around again as my brother puts the right letters into words. Maybe I should call you again.

"Can you open the hotel room door right now?"

The restless gears in my head rumble to a grinding halt. Now? For what?

"For what?"

"Just open it, sis." - so unobtrusive and unexplanatory, followed by another gray block of letters: "You'll thank me later :)"

"Don't smile at me."

":)" - naturally, a smile. Damn Finn.

I dial you again and reluctantly get out of bed, shuffling my feet as if I were going to the lacquered scaffold under the shouts and whistles of the French Revolution crowd, but in fact only the thin tulle is swaying in the night wind, and the noise of rare cars, which enters the room so valiantly with the help of the open balcony. And here is the guillotine itself in the form of an oak door. I touch the gilded cold handle with the palm of my hand with pressure, and feel the massive blade whistling as it flies straight at my neck, severing my head. You're standing in front of me.

You look me in the eye and leisurely take the phone out of the pocket of your wide bard palazzo pants. Your accurate fingers finally touch the ill-fated green answer button before you bring the display to your ear. There's a slight, confused smirk on your lips, and on my end of the line there's finally the beeps and this mechanical female voice have finally died down. But it is still impossible to answer you, I can only stare at you in disbelief, as if you were a masterpiece that had escaped from the Louvre and had personally come to my doorstep.

"Bonsoir, Madame Eilish," your soft, purring timbre mightily shatters all anxiety, defeating the monster in my head. The only thing left were the massive chains of patience and self-control that held it back. You say what I've been longing to hear for these fucking eleven hours. You sound the way you've imprinted on my memory for the many hours we've spent together. - "A special gift exclusively for number one hundred and eleven."

I grab you into my hage, pulling you into the room in a flash. The door slams too loudly for midnight, but I don't care, you gasp, rustling a small package - I don't care, you babbling a hundred apologies for this frightening silence - I also don't care, girl. I don't care, I don't care, I don't care! I just leave a lot of barely visible lip gloss prints on your face, showering you with hot kisses, clinging to your lips with mutual hunger, making you almost choke, but I don't care! You don't pull away, just squeeze tighter, sliding down the wall a little. You're here right now, and the rest of it doesn't matter. And how can I take offense at you, when you have overcome five thousand six hundred and ninety-two miles...? At least not right now.

We calm down only when we reach the floor and settle down on the soft pile of the carpet. Your face now gleams beautifully in the warm light of the bedside lamp, your hair slightly ruffled either from my hands or the wind outside.

"I'm sorry." - You gulp in air with your mouth and repeat again, touching my cheek gently as if I were fragile Chinese porcelain.

"I almost lost my mind, Y/n." - I snuggle closer into your palm, finding the needed reassurance finally. - "But I'm so glad you're here now, my dumbass."

You chuckle lightly before rising to your feet in one merged motion, then gallantly offering your hand to me. My gaze first clings to the not-so-little bard stain spilling over the once flawless whiteness of your favorite shirt.

"What's this?"

"It's wine," you answer innocently as we walk to the back of the room, me holding your hand and intertwining our fingers, you holding the paper bag in front of you in your free left. - "I thought it unseemly to show up on a deep Parisian night and on our little holiday without a present. While we were choosing a variety with a nice elderly sommelier, he accidentally spilled some on me, for which he apologized for an extremely long time and stuffed a whole assortment of vegan sweets into the gift."

"Actually, it looks pretty good," I touch my hands to the damaged fabric where the wine petals had opened exactly opposite the heart. - "It looks like a flower, and it goes well with the pants."

"I told him the same thing, only in broken French!" - you laugh, sitting down on the bed. The package drops to the floor for nothing, revealing a dark bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon, a corkscrew, and a dark blue box of obviously not cheap candy. - "Got a cup of any kind?"

"Only if it's cup after some coffee," the porcelain taps lightly as I hand you the cup along with the saucer that was on the bedside table. Drinking coffee at night is a little professional whim.

The cork easily yields to you under the spiraled steel of the corkscrew, so the generous scarlet stream quickly fills the porcelain cup almost to the brim, cleverly masking the coffee ring, which has already managed to imprint on the white dishes. You carefully pass the cup back to me, giving me the honorable right of the first sip. You already have a chocolate candy hiding behind your cheek. Sweet tooth.

You ask me about the past day, listening with incorruptible interest, you ask about the progress of the promo, about my dreams, I listening about your flight, about our first meeting, about Paris at night. We just talk about everything that comes into our heads, while the candy slowly runs out and the scarlet column of alcohol reaches the glass bottom of the bottle, and the bottle becomes more transparent than before in the weak light.

"You look ravishing, did I mention?" - My throat burns a little with the slight spice mixed with the flavor of currants and cherries, and your careful and transfixed gaze, albeit slightly cloudy from the wine, pleasantly burns my heart. - "Although, you absolutely always have that."

And I see you blush and your lips bend into a pleasant smile. When you're drunk, you're so sweetly embarrassed every time, like the word compliments are received by you, not me. Insanely nice. Insanely beautiful.

"Merci beaucoup, L'amour de ma vie." - in sweet, purring French, because you are a total provocation today, presented so elegantly and unobtrusively that I can't think of anything else. The chiseled collarbones are not only hidden under the thin fabric of the branded shirt, but also topped with a weighty gold chain. I catch myself thinking that you remind me of exactly this wine in the porcelain of the cup, which I want to sip leisurely, enjoying it alone. To taste you on my tongue is much more desirable than that cedar-currant flavor in the cup.

The bottle is almost empty, and you will soon begin to look like this pink wine stain blooming on your shirt. You giggle, shifting your gaze in embarrassment to the rich black lacquered wood that elegantly fills the bedroom space.

"Wow, is that a piano?" - so childishly naive, just to avoid my gaze. Gently I place the cup in your palms and then touch your chin with my fingers, turning you straight toward me. - "it's beautiful."

Along with the alcohol and fever rushing through my arteries, an absurd idea popped into my head, and it was an original sin not to realize it. I lean closer, deliberately slowly, though the knot of heat has tightened quite a bit. I like getting you so hot, Y/n, you'd know.

"It's beautiful, but it's only missing your nakedness," a languid whisper in your ear and you're already burning like a match. It's gorgeous. - "Shall we fix it?"

And you nod so obediently that even an expensive room in the best hotel in France and the same expensive wine are nothing compared to this one gesture. This will be the first time for you, the first time for the two of us, and believe me, I'll do everything I can to make sure that it goes well. I won't disappoint you, because all I really want is to drown you in a sea of pleasure. Think of it as my little gift to honor our date, like this wine.

×××

You moan so sweetly, and the only thing I really want right now is to seal your voice in a bottle so that I can open it later at any opportunity when you're not around again. You rest both palms against the shiny black lacquer on the closed top of the grand piano, standing with your back to the most elegant instrument and your face to me. You're standing completely naked, just a pile of clothes under your feet, and I'm already face between your thighs, kneeling. You grip the fabric of my black cardigan with trembling fingers, and like a whimpering child, you pull it on yourself. And it's so exciting to fulfill your little whims, knowing that it's still going to be the way I want it. I throw the dark, soft cotton off of me - a "storm cloud" glistens and shimmers slightly in the light of one dim lamp before falling to the carpet with the rest of my clothes. I'm completely naked now, too. Your lustful eyes dance on the ink of my tattoos, as if not knowing where to stop.

"Do you like the view too much, my girl?" - a grin, and you look away a little in renewed embarrassment. I touch your beautiful thigh, stroking it. "Hey, I like it when you watch."

And you watch again, only now you're looking clearly into my eyes, looking into the depths of my abysses, which for you alone are ready to serve not as destruction but as an unbreakable refuge. Your gaze is so focused, as if you want to dive in headfirst into my seas.

"I just... I just like absolutely everything, and I really don't know where to stop."

"So look, you can even touch me, as much as you want and wherever you want. You're allowed, Y/n." - I rise from my knees to push the banquette back to the piano again and sit down. - "Just for you."

And you explore, touching my skin with a gentle that the most distinguished musicians of classical orchestras will envy. Your hands outline my hips, my waist. You cling to my ribs with your fingers, then you stroke my shoulders and arms. I see a spark of delight in your eyes when you feel how the muscles are easily felt under the alabaster of my skin, while you reach to the very tips of my fingers, interlacing one hand in a lock with yours. Your other hand touches my chest, alternately slightly squeezing each one, and frankly speaking, it becomes infinitely difficult to breathe evenly. The same your hand slides over the stomach, heading to the bottom with like a sharpened arrow. Oh, my Goodness...

"Does that feel good?" - you whisper, touching two fingers to my clit with light pressure, alternating with circular motions. It feels good. Crazy.

So much so that all the words suddenly disappear from my head and stick in my throat in broken syllables, unwilling to form into something intelligible. I had to make an effort not to just nod like a silly dummy, chiseling out a single: "good."

You smile, feeling a gradual confidence, as if you're finally stepping on solid ground after the weightlessness of space, having been successfully rehabilitated. And I finally realize I don't have to hold back anymore. I can pull you close to me, rewarding you with a dozen deep, hot kisses, I can marked you with a bright hickeys on your neck, I can pick you up under your hips and lay you top of the piano cover with your shoulder blades, under which steel strings are silently stretched. While you're trapped in a haze of excitement, I can trace a path with my tongue and lips from your breasts to the bottom of your belly, where everything is burning Vesuvius flame. I can, I can, I can...

"It's so romantic in Paris, isn't it? Won't even try to compare it, it's all love everywhere." - I make the first quick stroke of my tongue and then pull away, hovering over your face again. You barely keep the back of your head from banging against the wooden lid, arching your back in longing. Who says I forgot to get back at you for my nerves?

"I don't know, I guess, but I already have love in LA." - You exhale so hotly, but you endure stoically. You realize you deserve it, yes. - "And I don't need anyone else."

My own heart begs for mercy on your account with a solid thump against my sternum, and I'm back down in a flash, repeating the strokes again, playing with your folds to the accompaniment of your moans. You're delicious.

And when you thrust yourself on my fingers so obediently, waiting for the denouement, which burns you to the point of shaking, and then you spur me with my back to the lid, hovering over me with intermittent heavy breathing, but with such selfless love in your eyes; when you enter me with two fingers sharply, but so necessary and precise, easily beating out moan after moan from my lungs and ligaments, that I really realize how suitable an instrument like a piano is for you.

I realize that I also definitely already have love in LA, in the form of you.

[daisynik7]

Lipstick Lover

Pairing: Kishibe x f!reader

Word Count: ~1.5k

cw: porn without plot, smut - PIV sex (cowgirl), lipstick play, nipple play, blowjob, cunnilingus, spanking, pet names (slut, good girl, sweetheart, princess), multiple orgasms

Summary: You test out a new shade of lipstick while on vacation with Kishibe. Author’s Note: This is for @heavenlyevil's Summer of Pleasure event, check it out! Thank you for hosting this! Inspired by Lipstick Lover by Janelle Monáe, absolutely love this song. Likes, comments, and/or reblogs are always appreciated, hope you like this one! MDNI banner by @/cafekitsune.

It’s the first day of your vacation with Kishibe at an all-inclusive beach resort in Hawaii. The two of you flew in late last night, with only enough time to check-in to the hotel and settle into your room. Today, you’re prepared to lounge on the beach, soak up the island sun, and drink Mai Tais until the both of you are happily blitzed. However, your boyfriend always finds a way to throw a wrench in your plans, which isn’t always a bad thing. 

Kishibe waits for you on the couch, aloha shirt unbuttoned to reveal his chiseled abs. Seeing him in anything but his standard Public Safety uniform is jarring, but part of you is thrilled to witness this side of him. You come out of the room in your bikini, sarong wrapped around your waist. He smirks at the sight of you, spreading his thighs wider in his seat. “Look at you.”

You smile, twirling for him. “Like what you see?”

“Absolutely.” He stands up, walking towards you for a kiss. His hand trails down to your bare waist, caressing you. “You sure you don’t want to stay in the room today?”

You giggle. “We didn’t come all the way here just to stay in, did we? Oh! Let me put on my new lipstick before we head out.” Returning to the bedroom, you retrieve your makeup bag, searching for the one you bought specifically for this vacation. He follows you inside, standing behind you, hands in his pockets, watching you carefully apply the rouge. When you’re done, you stick a finger in your mouth, sliding it out quickly to collect the excess.

He hums curiously behind you, clearly amused by what you just did. You turn to him, giggling. “What?”

He steps to you, thumb grazing your chin. “I think you’ve still got some left. Here.” He slips his thumb past your lips, sliding it across your tongue. You suck on him, eyes glued to his, until he slowly pulls out, a string of spit dragging with it. He swallows hard, tracing the outline of your mouth with his wet finger, smudging it at the corner. “Oops. Looks like I messed it up. You better fix it.” His voice is low and gruff, filled with lust. 

Your stomach flutters, familiar with the hungry look in his eyes. Withing breaking your gaze, you reach behind you for it, rolling it up to paint it aimlessly on your lips. “Is this better?”

“Not sure. Try it out on me,” he says, pointing to his neck.

You tilt your head, pressing a kiss right below his jawline, leaving a stain on his skin. He inspects it in the mirror, tutting. “Still not enough. More.”

Obeying, you reapply, making sure you have enough on to cover the rest of his neck, maybe even his cheeks. Your body tingles with excitement, knowing exactly where this is leading to. You scatter kisses across his chest, marking him with different opacities of red. He bows his head so you can kiss his cheeks, particularly on the scar that runs along the left side of his face. Lastly, you land on his lips, kissing him sloppily, the pigment smeared on his mouth and yours. 

He leads you toward the bed, sitting at the edge, shrugging his shirt completely off. His fingers brush the marks you left for him, eventually trailing down to the waistband of his swim trunks, sliding them down until they’re pooled around his ankles, kicking them off. His cock springs against his abdomen, glistening at the tip as he leans back on his hands, thighs in a wide stance. “Put that gorgeous mouth on me, princess. Want it pretty just like your lips.”

Kneeling in front of him, you wrap your fingers around his shaft, puckering at the tip, licking off his precum. He groans, cock twitching as you sink down on him, surrounding him in your wet heat. “Fuck. You always suck it so good,” he praises, his hand gently resting on your bobbing head. You hum against him, too full of his engorged dick to speak. You’ve since stripped your sarong off, fingers rubbing at your clit from outside your bikini while you fist his cock into your mouth. He stares at you, barely blinking, not wanting to miss a second of this deliciously obscene show you’re putting on for him. 

“Take it off and touch yourself,” he demands.

Nodding, you slip out of your bottoms, dipping your finger in your arousal to flick it against your bud. At the same time, you swallow him whole, guzzling his dick as far down your throat as you can. He’s got both his hands on you now, gripping your head firmly while he thrusts slowly inside you. With your free hand, you cradle his balls, squeezing them delicately with your fingers. He swears, bucking his hips suddenly. “Fuck, I’m going to come if you keep doing that.”

This only makes you torment him more, gliding to the tip to swirl your tongue around it, fisting his shaft quickly until he comes, pulsing his hot seed inside you. You swallow his load, spit trickling from the corners of your lips. There’s makeup smeared all over his cock, evidence of your dirty deed. “Look how pretty it is, covered in my kisses,” you purr, still fingering yourself, admiring your work.

“Want to mark you too.”

You raise a brow at him as you stand in front of him. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.” He hoists you onto his lap. “Put it on me.” 

You uncap the lipstick, giggling as you apply it on him, velvety with the maroon sheen. “My turn,” he growls, sucking on your neck.

You grind on him while he decorates kisses on your body, tinted imprints on your collarbones, your cheeks, your forehead. He removes your top to latch his mouth to your breasts, suckling at your nipples until their swollen and peaked. His hands grip your hips, rocking you back and forth on his lap, his cock beneath you, still smudged with crimson. 

“So fucking sexy,” he says, laying down on the bed. “Let me taste you.”

You crawl to him, turned towards the headboard, straddling his face carefully. He laughs, delivering a loud smack to your ass. “You always act shy at first. Come on. Smother me with this pussy. I know you want to.” Grasping your hips, he pulls you down to him, pressed to your cunt, dragging his tongue on your clit. He devours you messily, wet squelches getting nastier with each passing second as you ride him, clutching his hair. 

“Fuck my face, sweetheart. Just like that, fuck,” he muffles, slobbering on your dripping pussy. Red is blotched all over his lips now, chin shiny with saliva and slick. He reaches one hand towards his cock, which is hard again, surrounding it in his fist to stroke it. “Love eating out this perfect cunt. Gets me so fucking hard.”

He sucks on your clit until it’s plump in his mouth while you whine from the sensation, limbs spasming from the pleasure. You feel him grin against you, cooing, “Is my good girl going to come?”

“Yes,” you answer in a hurried response. You ride him faster, clit tingling as you gush on his tongue. He moans, licking every drop of your orgasm to swallow down his throat. “Think you can take my cock?” 

Catching your breath, you nod, lifting off him to position yourself on top, rubbing your swollen pussy along his shaft. You brain is hazy, but still, you crave more of him, especially that perfect cock inside you. “Fuck me, Kishibe. I want it, I want it.”

“Yeah?” He watches as you guide his dick inside you, sliding in smoothly. “You want me, huh? My perfect, little cock slut. Then take it. Take this cock.” 

You bounce on his lap, his cock deep inside you, stimulating your sweet spot repeatedly with each thrust of his hips. His fingers dig into your flesh, holding you tightly at the waist, guiding your body with his. You’re high on ecstasy, intoxicated by the pleasure. He slaps your ass several times, hard enough to leave a burn that ignites your skin. You lean forward, collapsing on him, too spent to continue riding him. He takes over, planting his feet to the sheets, pounding you relentlessly until you’re unraveling for him once more, coating him in your arousal. 

“That’s it, get it fucking creamy for me,” he whispers, nibbling at your earlobe. “You want my cum now?”

Too fucked-out, you nod dumbly, tongue lolling out of your mouth. He chuckles, swiping his thumb across your lips. “I can’t hear you, sweetheart.”

“Yes. Please. Fill me up,” you beg, twitching around him.

“So needy. Always begging me to stuff you,” he teases, fucking you rough, bed creaking beneath you. “Fuck, I’m coming, princess. I’m coming.”

He shoots inside you, arms wrapped around you in an intimate embrace, kissing you. You’re both a mess, rose stains spattered on your body, especially blurred over your mouths. Sweat dewy on your skin, white sheets twisted below you and smudged with residual makeup. When he pulls out of you, his cum trickles out of your slit slowly, leaking down your thighs. You roll over next to him, exhausted and beyond satisfied.

He turns to face you, caressing your cheek. “So…have any other shades you want to test out?”

[palewolfcheesecake-blog]

A Documented List of All of Ayrton Senna's and Gerhard Berger's Pranks on Each Other

Source: this Reddit post (thank you deleted Reddit user, you're a real one)

For those who don't know, from 1990 to 1992, Berger and Senna were teammates, they also pranked each other constantly, pranks that were approved by Ron Dennis himself, here's a list of all the pranks and goofs they played on each other

The Briefcase Incident: During the Italian GP weekend, Senna and Berger were riding a helicopter over Monza, during the flight, Senna was showing off his new tailor made carbon fiber composite briefcase, Senna argued that because of it being carbon fiber, it would be impossible to destroy, Berger tested Senna's hypothesis by throwing the briefcase off the helicopter, the briefcase reportedly fell somewhere on the track and was retrieved

The Hose Incident: several days before the race, at a dinner that Senna and Berger attended, many people were getting thrown into the pool as a joke, Berger escaped and Senna ran away to his room, Berger chased him down, Senna threw a glass of water at him in self defense, now the game was on, Berger and the guests concocted an extension to a hose and slid it under his bedroom door at 3 in the morning, Senna jumped through the window to escape, according to Berger "it looked as if a bomb exploded in his room"

The Frog Incident: During their stay at Australia, Berger filled Senna's hotel room with 12 frogs, according to Berger, they were more like toads, Senna stormed to confront Berger, he said "i've spent an hour catching 12 frogs in my room" Berger replied "did you find the snake?", Senna responded by buying an extremely strong smelling French cheese, stuck into Berger's AC unit, and cranked it up

The Shaving Cream Incident: On the night of an important dinner with Honda Executives, Senna decided to fill Berger's shoes with shaving cream, forcing him to attend this important dinner with a tuxedo and running shoes, Berger tried to take revenge by mixing 4 sleeping pills into some orange juice the day of the Japanese GP, but the suspicious drink was denied, Note: some reports say that the drink was offered to Senna, others state it was offered to Maurício Gugelmin, a fellow Brazilian who was in on the original prank and was driving for Layton house at the time

The Passport Incident: possibly one of the funniest pranks, during a trip to Argentina, Senna's passport was checked, only to find his photo had been replaced with, according to Ron Dennis " an equivalent-sized piece of male genitalia" i.e a picture of cock and balls, this might seem hilarious to you, but airport security didn't find it funny, and Senna was detained for 24 hours, as revenge, Senna superglued all of Berger's credit cards together

Honorable mentions: The Pembrey Circuit Incident: During a test at Pembrey Circuit in Wales, a very small track with a confusing layout, Mclaren engineers purposely gave Senna wrong instructions on the correct layout of the track, after 3 laps, Senna storms back to his mechanics, yells "you funny fuckers" then did a 180 spin and drove 3 laps on the right layout

The Lancia Incident: during the first day of testing for the 1995 Season, now at Ferrari, Berger and Jean Alesi stole Jean Todt's Lancia Delta, and while riding around in it, Berger decided it would be funny to rip the handbrake, they crashed and flipped Jean Todt's car, Alesi had to be taken to the hospital, when Jean Todt asked Berger what happened to his car, Berger replied that he and Alesi had "put some slight curb marks on the roof"

Bonus stories from the comment section:

[mattmurdock42]

A COMFORT AND MAGICAL TRIP WITH YOUR HUSBAND.

Henry Cavill X Female Reader / Wife X Husband

+- 1.3 k

Pov: you and Henry go on a rod trip, but he accidentaly unlocked one of your old traumas. But he can fix It, of course.

Fluff, cute, cuddlings and lots of huggs.

You and Henry were at a car trip, it was your vacation togheter, and you two have being planning it since a long time ago. You´d be on the trip for two weeks. First, there was a 12 hours road to the first city, which you were going to stay there for five days, on a 5 star motel. You and Henry left your house early, planing to get there at 17 pm. He would start driving at 3 am and you would change places at 9 am, so each would drive 6 hours. Everything was perfect. You two got on the car and you layed on the back seat and he sat on the driver place. At 9, he stopped at a caffe for you two have breakfast. You could notice how tired he was. You both ate and got in the car.

Henry: good night, my piglly.

He immediately fell asleep, and you couldn´t believe what you had just heard. Piggly? What did he meant with that? Was he calling you fat, hairy, smelly, what? Your feelings were a mix between anger, sadness, shame and anxiety. Maybe he meant well, but you didn´t care, you two had already discussed about what to call one another, he knew he should ask about adding a new pet name.

He woke up at 15 pm, and you were so mad at him, you could barelly look at him. Piggly? After some time he noticed something was not right with you.

Henry: y/n, is eveyithing okay?

y/n: i don´t know.

Your feelings were hurt, he knew how this kind of things could reach deep in you. You didn´t even know what to say to him.

Henry: Tell me what is wrong.

y/n: you know what is wrong.

He stopped to think about it for one second.

Henry: i´m sorry, but really don´t know.

y/n: then maybe you should think harder.

You two spent the rest of the trip in silence. You arrived at the motel, you checked in and, when you were going to your bedroom, Henry stoped you and said:

Henry: darling, i´ve thought during hours and i still don´t know. Please, tell me what i did, so i may not repeat it.

You kept going and arrived in front of your room, unlocking the door you say:

y/n: you did nothing much, piggly.

He stoped and, in a second, the memory came into his mind. He knew how you didn´t liked this name because of your childhood trauma. When you were a child, you´d spent christmas at your grandma, with your cousins, and your grandma had nicknames for all of you. She meant well, but didn´t knew the damage she was doing to you, by calling all of your cousins "little giraffes", and you "little hippo", or "piggly", somtimes. She called you that name because you were the only "fat" child ( you weren´t actually really fat). You knew it wasn´t her intension to make you feel bad, it was just her way of showing afection. You knew how much she loved you, always pampering you. However, it marked you forever. Henry knew how much he messed up. He entered the room and went to the bed and gripped your waist.

Henry: y/n, i´m so, so sorry. I was so tired that my brain stoped prossesing. I thought about that word because i had just ate bacon, you saw it. So, when i got in the car, i thought about saying good night to you and calling you something nice. I´m really sorry.

You were feeling disgusted by your body, all your anxiety had come back. You got away from his hands.

yn: i need to be alone for a while.

You went to the balcony to looked at te sea and wet your feet at the indoor small pool that the room had. After some minutes thinking, you came back inside and went to him. He was sitting at the bed, looking at his cellphone. He left his phone as soon as he saw you, looking at your eyes. You put your hands on his cheeks.

y/n: let´s eat, it´s been 8 hours since we last ate.

He agrees and you go to the hotel´s restaurant. During dinner, you two discussed what you were going to do for the rest of the night. You two agreed to stay in the pool, to relax from the road.

After dinner, you were at the pool, with some soft music behind. You weren´t as talktive and needy as before, and this was killing Henry. He loved how annoyingly quiet you could be when there were other people around, but when it was just you two, you didn´t shut up. He decides to get near you to resolve it. He gently aproches you from beside, hugging you.

Henry: please, y/n, you know i didn´t mean anything bad. I love you. You are the most beautiful woman ever. Stop overthinking. Just love yourself like i love you. Your grandma was a mean woman, you know that, you told me several times. She accomplished nothing on her life for you to listen to her. This is your own thoughts, pay attention to then, please. I´m so sorry.

You hug him, burying your face at his wet, beefy chest. You get away and keeps looking at the sea. Your behavior was starting to piss him off. He longed this time alone with you for so many time, and now you were upset because of an old lady. You two decided to go to sleep. You took a shower and layed on the bed. He was ready for your usual cuddles, which calmed you from the day, but you weren´t even close to him, you were laying at the extreme edge of the bed.

Henry: darling, come near me.

y/n: not now.

Henry: please, i can make you sleep faster, you know that.

y/n: i´ll sleep in some minutes.

He couldn´t take it anymore.

Henry: if you don´t come here by yourself, i´ll go there and make you come, in a not gentle way.

y/n: i doubt it.

You said and closed your eyes.

Suddenly, you feel a hand brutally grabing your waist and quickly lifting your uper body, as if you were a doll. Henry turned you to be face to face with him. Sometimes you forgot how strong he were. He placed you by his side and said.

Henry: i told you.

You tried to scape.

Henry: darling, please, stay. I need you. i will be the one who wont sleep without my other half.

As he said that, you quiet up. After some minutes, you go on top of him hugging his big chest, feeling his to hot warm through your body. You finnaly relaxed and admitted:

y/n: thank you, for being by my side and understanding my needs. And sorry for ruinning the first part of our trip.

Henry: it is not your fault, darling, i could never blame you for that.

You two fall asleep like that. The next morning, you wake up and go to have breakfast. You were as happy as before, talking about your plans for today and tomorrow, teasing him in sexual ways that you knew it would come back after the sun was sat, and only the moon could see you both at your beachy room,, exploring each others body without a map. A so welcoming and cozy place for the other.

[glorianamultistan]

omg,, can i like, request park seojoon x male reader?? maybe something like some smut after a swimming session 😩 (because seojoon shirtless does unimaginable things to me, and it being forbidden would be so hot hhdhsgs)

love your writing!! keep up the good work omg

OMG! Thank you so much @flwrboi for requesting this. It took too much time, but I hope what I write will be worth it. Also, since you have not specified the reader's disposition, I am taking some liberty. This is obviously, a work of fiction, just presented in a different form.

Park Seojoon x Male Reader

I do not own the pic.

This letter was found in Seojoon's private room at the swimming club, it was not meant to be read by you but due to the request of many and the freedom of knowledge, here it is revealed, through some edits to conceal the names of the most immediate persons, you may form your opinions but remember that offense is allusive and envy is the real poison.

Hyung,

I never thought that I would be related, even if distantly, to you, and in the moments of our first random encounters as relatives, we both know how we tried to not let the past interfere with our present.

The first night in that hotel, when you took me to your room, a mere 19-year-old virgin, with an upcoming star, I felt the golds and whites rush through your skin into my body and all other marks and reliques you left on me; I preserved them till I was able to so without losing my sanity.

For months I felt the ghost of touches and bites on my whole body, you were there, on the screen, shinning brighter than ever and I lived on with the hauntings; nobody after you came close to make me live through those sensations again, they bit, spanked, kissed and put it in the same spots but all were just a parody.

Then, slowly, I recovered from the past and tried to focus on my current life; I had to finish my university degree, and watching you reach new heights assured me that the chance encounter was some cosmic justice done to me to balance out all the past misfortunes.

Yet, after two years of that, there you were again, with a blonde undercut, smiling, the perfect boyfriend of the perfect child of the family. Did you choose my cousin to come back to me? I know, I dream a lot.

I saw the disbalance in your eyes as I was introduced to you, but we had roles to play; we did well, for the most part of it. Two, three, four family gatherings, and the thread was thin, wafered ice, one hot breath away from the abysmal collapse.

And when you were asked to drop me off at my flat, you had to deny, you had to say no and I had to say that I am fine, and should've taken a cab.

I will mark that as the turn, the makeout in the car, the blowjob, the whole night at my flat; you kissed every time with such a fierce will to not let go that the whole next week my tongue felt rough, were you scared that it won't ever happen again? Is that why you wanted to fill me 'to the brim, everywhere'?

Then came the suggestion of swimming lessons, and the naive little cousin of mine, she thought you were a caring hyung to offer help to me.

Your manager arranged everything, and I could not be more thankful to anyone, booking the swimming club for the whole days we were there, covering up for us; for a moment I thought you were sleeping with him too to make him do this much for us, but some people genuinely want to see us happy.

There, in the pool, as you taught me how to swim, I always looked over at your body, glistening with water, and felt as if I were to touch you, you would flow away, like a mirage, but you always assured by quite smoothly going in me that you will be there, holding me, using me and keeping me with you.

You broke up with my cousin after your relationship was publicised and my whole family went against you. So I had no choice but to cut them out of my life to be with you, still, holding on to your promise of living together; I have waited for more than a year now.

Yesterday after we had our swimming session, and we had to drain out the pool as you insisted on doing it in the pool, I put this in your room before leaving, as a confession, though we have confessed many times before, and as a reminder to fulfill your promise too.

I will be meeting you next week now as you have to go abroad, so I hope you come back to me first before going to your place; I will wait while wearing your favourite apron.

love you,

M/L.

P.S.:- If you liked it, you can support me by buying me a coffee; link's on my page.

[brokenjere]

bad in the bones (c.f) (part 8)

a/n: hey guys! hope you enjoy this next part! I wanna let everyone know that I really only planned this series to be around 10 chapters, so I can’t say how many more parts are left but with that being said, I have some other things up my sleeve to keep everyone busy until season two comes out 🫣🫣🫣 lmk if you wanna be added to the tag list!

A lot of dads showed up - John, the man who had been like a father to me for most of my life up until last year when his marriage to Laurel ended more cordigally than I would have anticipated. Laurel still invited him up for the Fourth despite the fact his new girlfriend was on his arm and she couldn’t have been much older than me. She smiles and pretends it’s not crushing her soul, but I think maybe it was. At least just a little bit. 

Adam showed up, too. After Susannah told everyone he wasn’t coming, Conrad seemed to be in high spirits. He was still canoolding with Nicole in the pool and helped me, Belly, and Jeremiah make pomegranate margaritas in their dad’s special blender but his smile was brighter than I had seen it all morning. When he still thought his dad wasn’t coming. Adam still strolled in, though like everyone was happy to see him. Jeremiah was the only one who smiled. 

The only dad that didn’t show up was mine. Not that he was invited but I couldn’t help but think about where he was. Where my mom was. Who she was spending the holiday with. I doubt she had a homemade cake and margaritas and there probably weren’t red, white, and blue decorations surrounding her. There might be a pool. Maybe she was laying out by it and being served by someone in a fancy hotel that her new boyfriend was paying for. I didn’t really know. That’s where she was last year, anyway. 

I liked her being gone, then. All my friends and I got too drunk in the backyard because there were no adults to stop us. Josh waded in the pool near the edge where I sat. His hands gripped my calves and he kissed my thighs and he mumbled how much he loved me in between kisses. Everyone was envious of us. It was obvious in the way they watched us. Josh never cared much for PDA except when he was drinking. 

Last year, after spending so much time in the pool that he became a prune, he leaned over my tanning body and dripped water all over me while kissing my cheeks. He begged me to go upstairs with him and after telling him no too many times, he lifted me up bridal style and carried me up to my room while piles of water marked our path. 

This year, I’m alone with a bottle of vodka resting on my stomach. I balance the neck between my two fingers and it rises and falls with my breathing. Everyone is down at the beach with the pitcher of the pomegranate margaritas that we made. Belly begged me to come, holding my hands in hers as she pleaded with me. I told her I wasn’t feeling well and she hesitated, but left me anyway. 

The sun is shining through the window and I’m trying to keep my eyes closed to drown out the brightness but a shadow looms over my eyes. I opened one eye and suint at the figure hanging over me. It’s Conrad. “There you are,” he says with a laugh. His hair flops over his eyes and he’s smiling so wide I think he might swallow me whole. “I’ve been looking for you. Belly is getting totally wasted, you should see her.” I don’t laugh but I manage to muster a smile. “What’s wrong?” He asks me, his smile fading. I don’t want it to fade, I want it there plsatered between his cheeks forever. 

“Nothing.” He shakes his head as if he doesn’t believe me and grabs the bottle from me. He takes a sip and jumps over the couch. I move my legs so he doesn’t land on them and he pulls them back into his lap. “What are you doing up here?” 

“It was all getting too much. Everyone is out of hand,” he tells me. He watches the alcohol swirl around in the glass bottle and he’s not looking at me but his thumb is rubbing my calf as it pushes into his thigh and then he asks me if I’m watching the fireworks tonight. “Jeremiah got some good ones to impress Dad, but I don’t even know if he’s staying.” Their dad coming was a shock to everyone, I think. Susannah told everyone this morning he wasn’t going to come but he showed up later with a six-pack of beer and Conrad’s mood visibly shifted. I didn’t ask, though. 

“Why do you say that?” I ask carefully. His breath is shaky and my question wavers on thin ice. He sighs and squeezes my ankle. 

“He and my mom got into it earlier. I don’t think he really had to work, I think Mom didn’t want him here,” he tells me. I tap my foot on the bottle in his hands and he looks at me. His eyes make my heart break. “I didn’t really want him here, either.” 

“What about Jeremiah?” 

“He was ecstatic. Bought a whole show of fireworks.” I smile at the thought but Conrad doesn’t. “So, are you coming?” 

“I don’t think so.” He nods and taps his fingers on my legs. “Unless you want me to?” 

“There’s a moon eclipse tonight,” he says. 

“It’s called a syzygy,” I say. “When the moon, sun, and Earth align. It comes from the Greek word syzgia which means ‘yoked together’.” He smiles at me and I can feel my cheeks heat up. “I was in science club for a while,” I admit. Conrad laughs. A real laugh with his head thrown back and his face turning red and it’s contagious. 

“Yoked together, huh?” He asks and I nod. “Well, yn, do you want to go see the sun, moon, and Earth be yoked together with me later?” 

“What about Nicole?” I hate myself for asking but I have to know so I ask anyway. 

“She doesn’t mean anything to me but I can’t wait around for you forever.” He looks at me and I know he doesn’t want to not wait for me. We look at each other and I know I should say something and tell him he doesn’t have to wait for me because I’m right here but there’s too much at stake and instead of saying what I want to say, I reach for the bottle of vodka and drink it until it’s gone and the room erupts in noise. Susannah calls for cake and Belly is at her heels like a toddler feening for sugar. “We should go out there,” he mumbles, lifting my legs off his lap and standing up. My legs slam down on the couch and I feel horrible. 

I have no choice but to follow him for cake except there won’t be any cake because as I step out onto the patio, Belly skips down the stairs and trips over her own feet and knocks into Susannah and the cake goes everywhere. 

Everyone rushes to Susannah's side but I’m glued in place. Mr. Fisher grabs at his wife and she pushes him off - “don’t touch me,” she yells. Everyone draws back. I can see Conrad’s shoulder tense in front of me. “I’m fine, I’m fine.” She stands up, smooths down her dress, and walks passed everyone and into the house ignoring Belly’s slew of apologies. 

“So I guess no cake,” Conrad mumbles. I think I’m the only one who heard him. John brings Belly inside. She’s stumbling over her feet and slurring her words and John mouths I’m sorry to me. 

I don’t think Belly has ever gotten drunk before. In fact, she was always the one tellng everyone to slow down. She’d answer her phone on the first ring everytime I called and walked wherever I was. It wasn’t that big of a town and I never went very far, but one time she even had to take a bus to the party I was at. She waited for me and walked me home and made sure I didn’t stumble into the street. She provided water and Advil adn stayed with me when my mom wasn’t home. Belly was always stable. Sure. Secure. The sun that broke through my dark clouds.

It’s no surprise to me that no one is mad at her for ruining the cake. Even Susannah, who now has to buy a new cake stand, smiled and said everything was okay. No one could be mad at her even when she was a drunken mess. 

She’s in her bed, a half-eaten piece of pizza on her end table and she’s fast asleep. I almost want to wake her up. Tell her that everything is okay because Susannah said so and I know she would believe me. I want to tell her that she doesn’t have to change who she is because her friends at the country club want her to. She is not fasinators and white gloves and too much blush on her cheeks. She is not a drunken mess with sand in her shoes. She is more than that. 

There’s a soft knock on the door and I turn to see Conrad leaning against the door jam. He’s watching her, too. He doesn’t look at me until I speak. “Wanna go see the eclipse?” He smiles and holds out his hand for me and I take it. I check behind me one more time to make sure she’s asleep before disappearing down the hall with Conrad. Guilt rushing up my throat and I swallow it down. 

He takes me back to the pier as the sun goes down. We pass the big white boat and instead of taking me sailing, he takes me to Shark Bait. “You’re gonna take this thing out?” I ask, eyeing the ores  suspiciously. Conrad laughs and he helps me aboard. There’s already blankets in the boat and he opens one up to wrap it around my body. His hands linger on my arms and I swallow the guilt again. 

“You’re gonna help me row, okay?” 

“You don’t always have to teach me something, you know,” I whisper to him. I liked when he taught me stuff, though. I like when he’s passionate and excited and I like when he smiles with his eyes like he’s doing right now. 

“To impress a girl that already knows everything, I think I do.”

“You’d be surprised at how little I really know.” Conrad licks his lips and his eyes soften and instead of kissing him like I want to do, I pull away and grab at an ore. “So, how do we do this?” He clears his throat and talks me through the steps and we row the boat out as far as he lets me. I think I could have kept going forever until we hit another piece of land where no one knows us and no one is in love with him and I can kiss him if I want to. 

It starts to get really dark, especially out in the water where there are no lights besides the pier a million miles away. Conrad points to the stars and asks me what the constellations are and I tell him and then he gawks at me as if he’s never been more amazed in his life. He tells me, “I never know what’s going to come out of your mouth.” 

And I want to say, “I love you.” But I don’t. I don’t say it and I don’t know if I love him but right now, in the dark, when I can’t really see his face clearly and his arm feels more real next to mine than it has ever felt before, I might. 

We sit on the floor of the boat and lean back against the seat. Conrad’s hand finds my leg and he rests it on my thigh. His fingers rub against my skin. It’s sweet and respectful and I don’t make him stop because right now it’s just me, him, and the planets being yoked together. I turn my head to say something and Conrad turns his at the same time and the only reason I know he’s so close to me is because I can feel his breath on my lips. The tip of his nose is touching mine and when I can’t see him, it’s easier to press my lips to his and not feel guilty. 

His hand finds my face in the dark and he cups my cheek. I lose myself in him. His lips, his scent, the way his hair brushes against my forehead when he presses his body closer to mine. This kiss is different. I’m not kissing him because I want to forget. I’m not kissing him because he’s here and convenient. I’m kissing him because I want to and the way that I’m feeling inside needs a way to escape and the only way they can be let out is this. 

I find myself on top of him. My hands are in his hair. His hands are on my waist. He pulls away briefly and between his heavy breath he says, “are you sure?” I’m not sure what he means by that, at least not right away. I wouldn’t be doing this if I wasn’t sure but I put myself in his shoes for a moment and maybe he doesn’t know that. I nod. “I don’t want you to be sure now and then regret it in the morning.” 

“I don’t regret anything,” I say. “I don’t regret anything when it’s with you.” I mean it. I try to force him to believe me so I kiss him again and he leans into me and I know he does. 

“Then what’s been the issue?” He whispers. His thumb rubs against my cheek and I lean my face into him. “You know I can’t get you out of my mind.” 

“Belly,” I tell him. “She loves you and she’s my best friend.” He stiffens and maybe now he gets it. Why I said I can’t be with him. My heart races and I have to tell myself he’s not going to get up. He’s not going to leave. He’s not going to make me feel like I made a mistake. I repeat these three things in my head until he eventually speaks. 

“That’s why you asked me that the first night on the beach? About her?” I nod my head and he kisses my forehead and I like us like this. “Okay,” he says. I don’t know what he means by that but I don’t care because he kisses me again and I kiss him back and he roll around on the bottom of the boat and we’re wrapped up in the blanket and each other. He strokes my head and tells me stories until I fall asleep on his chest. I don’t wake up until the sun does. 

We row back to the pier and we don’t talk about last night. Not really, anyway. He smirks when he looks at me and keeps eye contact for too long but I don’t blame him because if I could, I’d capture the way he looks right now and keep it in my back pocket forever. “Are you ready to go home?” He’s leaning against the passenger side door of the car with a hesitant smile on his face.

“No, but yes.” He pushes himself off the car and kisses me. He lingers on my lips like he doesn’t want the moment to end and then he opens my door for me and drives us home. He holds my hand the whole way until we pull into the driveway. Seeing the house puts a pit in my stomach and he asks me if he can kiss me one more time before we go back to the real world and with the entire family still asleep. I say yes. 

The house feels heavier now that my head is so full of secrets and I knock on Belly’s door instinctively. She opens the door with a smile on her face. It looks misplaced because she’s not supposed to be happy, she’s supposed to be hungover, and seeing her happier than I feel inside makes me feel jealous and that makes me feel selfish. “What’s wrong?” She asks. The expression on my face was probably clear: guilt and fear, but not regret. Never regret.  I start to cry. I feel the tears drip down my cheeks and I try to wipe them away but Belly grabs my wrists and pulls me inside the room before I can and I sob. I collapse into her arms and I cry all over her pajama shirt and she doesn’t say anything. I can barely hear myself speaking but I know what I’m saying. Everything is wrong. Everything is wrong. Everything is wrong.

taglist: @marajillana@liltimmyst@angelayse @nani-2305 @drikawinchester @28cnn @nyenye @isthlsfate @spacefruitsblog @laceandsuch @peotego @hallecarey1

[sooverwhitesandpinks]

Canyon Moon 🌙

Harry Styles x y/n!reader warnings: angst, fluff, no mention of reader's gender

☺︎

So hard to leave it, that's what I always do

Harry would like to say he loves every part of his job. Endless love from seas of people shouting his name, the fortune, the friends he's made, the unforgettable experiences. It's everything he ever wanted and he would never say he regretted auditioning for the X-Factor or continuing his career after One Direction, but there were times when he resented his job. He hated that it took him away from his family, he hates that it takes him away from you.

"I wish I didn't have to go," he muttered quietly. The two of you liked to spend the last few days before tour with each other. Usually you'd stay in bed late and make each other food, the days were filled with lazy kisses and neighborhood walks. Lying out in the back yard and reading your books, though you guys usually ended up marking your pages and talking for hours.

That's where you were now. Sprawled out on a blanket in the backyard, the gentle sun warming your skin. You both laid on your backs, your open book rested face down on your stomach while you pulled apart sprigs of grass with your fingers. Harry lay beside you, one arm tucked under his head and the other resting under your head, his own book lying beside him, his place marked with a strip of pictures from a photo booth the two of you had visited a couple months ago.

"Don't say that, H. You love performing and people love to watch you perform. There's a billion people out there who can't wait to see you," you tried to lift his spirit. You both knew this was your last day together for the next month.

"I know. I'll just miss you is all," he said, sounding sad. You grabbed the book off your stomach and dog-eared the page before you set it down beside you.

"I'll miss you too, honey," you told him, scooting further into him.

"I just hate leaving you. You should just quit your job," he suggested. You looked up at him, his eyes closed as he let the sun soak his face. A tiny claw clip held the hair off of his forehead.

"Because they won't let me leave for months at a time to tour the world with my rockstar boyfriend?" You asked, letting your eyes run all over his features, committing every detail to memory.

"Correct," he smiled, opening his eyes to look into yours. Every time he looked at you, it took your breath away.

"Yeah, okay," you chuckled.

"I'm serious," he defended, grabbing onto your waist with the arm that had previously been under his head. He pulled you onto him, your legs moving to his sides so you could balance your weight on him.

"I know you are," you smiled, leaning down to kiss his pouted lips.

I'll be gone too long from you

Harry was performing one of the worst shows of his life. It started that morning. He woke up alone in his hotel room, excited because this was the first night of you joining him on tour for a few weeks.

He texted you that morning, wishing you a good day at work. Though he knew you probably wouldn't answer immediately, it was 5 AM where you were. You had to take a meeting in the morning before your LA to New York flight that afternoon. Then you would get off the plane and head straight to Madison Square Garden just in time to see Harry to go on.

Weeks of FaceTime calls, sweet texts, and watching his shows from laggy livestreams had finally led to this day. You were ecstatic, he was ecstatic.

That afternoon, he was lounging around backstage with Jeff when you called.

"Hey baby," he beamed, answering as soon as he saw your caller ID.

"Hey honey," you smiled hearing his voice, a stark contrast from the way you were fighting tears just seconds ago.

"How was work this morning? Is your flight about to take off?" He fired off, impatiently waiting to see you.

"It really sucked, H," your voice wavered as your eyes started rapidly pooling. "I have bad news."

"What's wrong, baby?" He asked, sitting up. You took a second to collect yourself.

"My boss pushed the 9 AM meeting this morning back an hour, I figured it wouldn't be a big deal since I had two hours before my flight boarded so I could just hurry afterwards and make it in time," your breathing picked up as you tried not to sob.

"Hey, you're alright. Just tell me what's going on," Harry could tell you were overwhelmed by your voice. He knew something had made you feel awful.

"He ran the meeting 30 minutes late and traffic was awful and I didn't make it in time. I'm so sorry, Harry. I went to the lady at the desk and she found me a seat on the flight that leaves here tonight at 9 PM," you told him from your seat at the airport, just minutes after your tear filled exchange with the nice airport ticket desk lady.

"What time would you get here?" He asked, getting up from his seat and walking into his dressing room.

"A little after 5 AM," you admitted, feeling awful. You guys were so excited to see each other on the first night of Harry's three shows at MSG.

"Okay," he sighed, attempting to blow his frustration out with a deep breath.

"I'm really sorry, Harry. I'll really quit my job this time," you tried to relay your guilt.

"It's not your fault, love. It's just a frustrating situation," he sat down on the sofa.

"I feel so terrible, honey. I'll stay a little extra before I go back, okay?" You told him.

"Well I won't say no to that," he said, blinking back the tears that had started to sting his eyes.

You guys didn't stay on the phone for much longer, both of you wanting to have a good cry but neither of you wanting the other to hear it

Hours later, there Harry was on stage. He performed with less enthusiasm than he typically did. He fumbled a few lyrics, tripped once or twice, wasn't as engaging with his fans. He knew it, he knew everyone else knew it. Yet, he couldn't quite pull himself out of it.

The funky feeling lasted the entire show. He showered with the feeling, and went to bed with the feeling. He didn't sleep though, his brain wouldn't calm down. His body knew you were on your way. He knew he should've slept, he would have to be up early to head to the airport to pick you up.

I'm going oh, I'm going home.

He stared at the ceiling for hours, jumping when the sound of his alarm went off. In ten minutes he was out the door and in the car. He walked into the airport and straight to your gate.

Harry waited a whole twenty minutes before he saw your face. Your puffy eyes indicated that you had been crying or sleeping or both. One of his hoodies adorned your body and your hair was tucked under the headphone resting around your neck. You looked beautiful.

Like always, you felt your breath leave as your eyes found Harry's. Your backpacked bounced against your spine as you hurried to him. His arms opened wide as soon as you approached, you jumped into him, tossing your arms around his neck.

"Fuck, I missed you," he breathed deeply into your neck.

"Not nearly as much as I missed you," you hummed into his shoulder. "I'm not nearly as good as making dinner."

"I'll make you all the dinner you want," he laughed into you, pulling back to look at you.

"That might be kinda hard when we're touring," you grinned, your facing warming as his eyes ran all over you.

"I'll find a way," he shook his head as he leaned in to kiss you, his hands sliding up to hold your cheeks. Your hands rested on the back of his neck as your lips met.

[vampire-the-askerade]

Gary Golden x Reader

[Did I go a little bit nuts with how long this is? Yes. But, it's my blog and I'll be cringe if I want to.]

There were certainly times when all of the vampire legends lent themselves to be true. But, one thing that many people including kindred exaggerated was how much energy you would have. It was always presented like vampires had almost unlimited motivation to do whatever they so desired. But, if your exhausted body dragging itself through the front door of the lobby and past the shabby pool area had anything to say about it, your energy was most certainly still limited. You had more than when you were human to be sure, but still finite.

You were so exhausted in fact that you couldn’t even make yourself go all the way to your haven, choosing instead to take a room at the Luckee Star Hotel. Perhaps it wasn’t the fanciest or well-kept place, but if it was safe enough for Nines to hide from all of the Camarilla and a pack of werewolves for a few nights then it would be safe enough to house an un-hunted you for one. After spending the night before helping the Nosferatu of the warrens hunt down the rest of the creatures left over from the mess a few months ago and spending the subsequent day tucked into some corner of the sewer where any of them that your group might have missed couldn’t get to you, all you wanted to do tonight was nothing. Maybe that sentiment would be hyperbolic later, but for right now it was all you were doing.

Lying on the bed, staring up at nothing except the cracked ceiling plaster, you almost felt yourself drifting off to sleep; or, rather, the feeling of when you would close your eyes in preparation to sleep when you were still alive. It was short-lived though, as you heard the floor creak, just slightly audible, but still there. Without looking over to where the sound was as to not alert your new guest that you knew they were there, you reached over, grabbed one of the extra pillows on the bed, and then threw it in the direction you heard the noise. It seemed you hit your mark as there was a soft thump followed by a gravelly laugh.

“Getting better all the time, boss.” That caught your attention as though you figure it was one of the Nosferatu, you didn’t expect it to be Gary. “Wouldn’t have caught me if this dump was up to code though.” He huffed as every step he took made the floor creak so much it sounded like it was about to cave in. You sat up on the bed and looked over at him. “So, what’s the visit for?” You asked. “Must be something important for you to come here yourself.’

Gary’s mouth started to tug into a deviant grin that threatened to show his crooked fangs beneath. “You sure about that? Perhaps I just got bored of the old sewer and decided to go for a walk.”

The look you gave him almost made him chuckle again. It had been a while since he had someone equally humor him, yet not take his antics quietly. You were fun like that.

“Oh, and on that walk you just so happened to get yourself to where I was staying for the night, huh?” You shook your head and leaned back to rest against the headboard behind the bed. “Well, why not? After you finished with your part of the house cleaning you left without a word. Makes me think you don’t like talking to ol’ Gary.” He stepped closer, his hands fidgeting by picking the seems on the edge of the pillowcase. “Besides, you have quite the place Downtown; why stay at this lice fest?” He practically giggled at the shiver that gave you. Sure, you knew that the place wasn’t that bad, but even the thought of the little critters made your cold blood run colder.

You easily let that pass over you though, and bounced back with asking, “Been there, have you?”

Gary shrugged and smugly replied, “Not my fault for being curious after a meeting close by. Why did they design the vents to be so large in those apartments?” His teeth were now on full display in all their tangled glory with how amused his teasing made him.

“To let a nut job that parties with skeletons rifle through my unmentionables, apparently.” You had closed your eyes again at this point and started to relax. “And, why would you of all people be worried if this place has head lice? Not like it would be a problem in your case.”

When there was no reply you opened your eyes again to see that Gary had managed to move even closer to you without creaking the floor this time. His face was less gleeful, but his eyes still had a mirth to them that let you know even though he was sore from being on the opposite end of the teasing, it was still all in good fun. “You planning on holding that pillow the whole time you’re here?” You asked.

“Thinkin' about smothering you with it.” He teased.

“I don’t think that would do much.” You snickered at the thought of suffocating someone who doesn’t breathe anymore.

“Doesn’t mean I can’t give it a try.” Gary’s smile was back, but you only saw it for a second before all you could see was the intricate detail of the stitching of the cloth pillowcase just barely illuminated by the lamplight of the room through the corner with the least pressure. While you were struggling to get the over-laundered yet still slightly musty-smelling pillow off of your face, you almost missed the feeling of the bed dipping down beside you when the pressure finally released. As you thought, Gary had either walked around or even climbed over you to sit on the other side of the bed.

He seemed to pick up on the fact that if you still could, you would have started to get rosy from how close the two of you were. Not that he thought too much about his ability to make people do that anymore, but he knew that there was something to be said about touch starvation, something that most kindred struggled with, making the simple act of sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with someone more intimate than it used to. “This alright, boss? I did come all the way here to see you, so I should get to sit down at least a minute.”

You just scoffed, knowing that he was going to whether you said yes or not; though you did think that if it really seemed to bother you Gary would have left. He might be a little self-absorbed, but he was not a total jerk. It did seem like he was planning on staying for the long haul as he had grabbed the remote and turned on the tv. Before you questioned it, he explained, “Gotta take advantage of this while I can. Bad reception where I live, ya know.”

“Are the others going to be alright with you gone this long?” You asked as shut your eyes and let the colors of the changing channels pulse through your eyelids in a lazy light show.

“Eh, they’re a smart bunch. They can handle me being out for the night. And, if Gehenna comes while I’m gone, they’ll know how to find me.” He chuckled before stopping on a movie. He only kept it on for a few minutes before starting his surf again. “Change your mind?” You asked about it, still not opening your eyes again. “Absolutely. These new actors and their, ‘talent,’ if that’s what you could call it! Probably find more convincing performances if you called the desk and asked for a smut channel.”

This gave you a smirk similar to his from earlier. “Gary Golden! Are you suggesting we watch porn together?” you teased. This seemed to actually ruffle his feathers and he was quick to correct your accusation. “Absolutely not! What sort of man do you take me for?”

You shrugged, “The kind that’s been stuck being the king of the sewers for at least the last two decades. Can’t imagine there’s many opportunities for dates down there.” This made him catch on that you weren’t being serious, so he took the extra pillow out of your hold, whacked you in the face with it, and then propped it behind himself to sit more comfortably.

Finally, he found something that he was content in watching. Based on the heavy use of brass and string instruments along with climbing scales in the music, this was something from the ’40s. “You know this one, huh?” You teased his ever stagnate taste in films. There was a raspy cackle next to you. “You could say that, boss.”

While the introduction credits were playing through, you subconsciously rested your head on Gary’s shoulder. He was very aware of this development and thought about saying something about it. But, he decided fairly quickly that he didn’t mind; he rather enjoyed it actually. “Listen, kid, about what I actually came here for. It was about those things we’ve been dealing with.” He stopped his thought and took a deep breath to clear his head, his undead body stilling completely again after. “Look, after dealing with some of the more nasty ones myself, I realize that you went through hell to do what you did alone the first time through.”

There was another pause. “Now, I don’t want people thinking I’ve gone soft, so I’m just gonna say this once. Thanks for everything.”

You smiled at the gesture but didn’t say anything as you knew it would just make him more awkward than he seemed to already feel by just working out that thank you. That’s when you heard him start to speak again, this time it wasn’t half as graveled as it usually was, but you would describe it as grainy. So, that’s where he knew this movie from.

“Listen here, you! When we first met you were nothin’ but a scruffed-up, snot-nosed kid that didn’t know up from down! I helped get you here, and what thanks do I get?” The ghost of Gary past razzed the character playing opposite of him in the scene. You heard the present-day Gary mumbling something while the leading lady replied, but you didn’t quite catch what it was. The next line let you know that he was quoting the lines in time with the movie. He must have revisited this one often.

“Well, what sort of thanks do you think a fellow in my position is entitled to?” Both Garys said at once. The sudden swelling of the strings in the music let you know what the thanks was; cracking an eye open did indeed show two people in the midst of an MPAA-approved kiss. This was followed by the woman slapping him.

“What? You’re not gonna reenact that scene?” You snickered.

“Depends, am I going to get that reaction?” He teased back.

“I’m sure you’ve got a lot more going for you than whoever that guy with the babyface in the movie did.” You elbowed him a bit.

Gary let out a still playful, yet slightly bitter chuckle, “Babyface, huh? Well, at least I had something back then. Now I fit into pageant shows with Count Orlock and The Phantom of the Opera.” This made you frown. He was easily sent into taking digs at himself, and sometimes it was difficult to tell what would set it off. “Be nice to yourself.” You scolded, “I’m sure a lot less has changed about you than you think.”

He hummed in thought before grumbling, “Sure, there’s plenty unchanged about me, at least as far as personality goes. Still as troublesome and cocksure as ever. But, we can both agree, the physical presentation’s not what it used to be. I’m still a lot of things, but kissable ain’t one of ‘em.” The last part was sprinkled with a resigned chuckle.

“That’s not true.” You were starting to fade off again and simply in contradict Gary mode that you didn’t think of the implications of what you just said.

Gary’s pointed ears went at attention at this, and a moment later a grin that spelled misery for you crept onto his face. “Oh, is that so, boss?” He purred and pulled the classic move of stretching his arm before wrapping it around your shoulder. This made everything click for you causing your head to shoot up from his shoulder as you tried to explain what you meant. There was little more than babbling that made it out of you before you were silenced by a thumb resting on your lips. “Ah, ah, ah~ You said what you said. Don’t try and lie about it now.”

Between the way his voice rumbled, how close he was to you, and the gentle, playful scrape of his claw against your lips and chin as he moved his thumb away, you couldn’t help the shiver that shook through your whole body. “Gary, I-“

“Misspoke. I know.” He chuckled, and despite his cheerful nature, there was still some level of disappointment in his demeanor that he simply couldn’t hide. “I was just pullin’ your leg. I never thought you would actually want to get that close with something like me.” He turned back to his movie, took his arm from around you, and muttered, “Who would?”

A scene went by with him focusing on the tv and you thinking quietly. Eventually, you shared what was on your mind. “Gary, I am going to do something in the immediate future that will most likely get me killed. But, I’ve decided that it will be a hell of a way to go out.” This concerned him, to say the least. But, seeing as you both had been teasing each other the whole night, his curiosity won over his concern.

“Really? And, what would that b-“

Gary let out a startled yell that was muffled by your lips landing on his. You had maneuvered yourself so that one of your legs was across one of his putting you halfway into his lap so that you could reach his face. Just as you went to pull away, Gary gave a dark, almost sinister chuckle. “Oh, no. You get your ass back over here.” He growled as he pulled you all the way onto his lap so that he got a firm hold on you.

“So, you think you can just kiss the Gary Golden and get away with it?” He tsked at you, claws drumming against the arms they were holding. “Where are your manners, boss? At least give a guy a heads-up before pulling a stunt like that.” One of his nails ran a line down the back of your arm, which sent another shiver through you. “You’ve been doin’ that a lot tonight, boss. Is it really that cold in here? Or, is it the thing that goes bump in the night chilling you to your core?”

“Perhaps, chilling isn’t what’s going on in this shameful, little body I’m holding.” He leaned to purr into your ear as crooked fangs threatened to pierce it, “Seems to me you might be heating up.”

You let out a whimper, which was met with an extremely humored laugh. “Christ, you’re easy.” Gary looked pleased with himself when he leaned back against the headboard and continued in a more neutral tone, “Guess you would have to be to want to kiss a mug like mine.”

“Hey!” You huffed at him insulting you both in one fell swoop.

“Look, I’m not complaining. Still holding your-kiss-stealing-self, aren’t I?” Gary snickered as his hands went from your arms to your back, talons lightly drawing patterns there. But, then something seemed to flash through his mind and his hold loosened so that his arms were simply resting on you rather than doing any actual holding. A defeated sigh escaped his nose. “Listen, if you were just doing this to try to show some pity to this ol’ sewer rat, then…”

Gary trailed off, but you got the gist of what he was thinking. “No, I really wanted to do that. For a while now actually. Not easy to get a moment to express that to someone as important and overall just busy as you are.” The hand you rested on his jaw seemed magnetic as his face was almost magically drawn to lean into it. Being himself, however, Gary only let this softer side show for a few moments before he was on the prowl once more.

“For a while now? Well, then who am I to disappoint? I do have a score to settle with you anyways. You still stole that kiss from me after all.” One of his hands moved to the back of your neck to gently push you forward while he sat up from the headboard to meet you halfway. The kiss was certainly longer than the first one, which was only a half step above being a peck. It was both soft, but earnest, reflective of Gary wanting this to be genuine, but still a bit fearful that it was your idea of a sick joke. Soon though, that fear was thrown away, at least for now, by the old playboy in him resurfacing after years of little activity. And, before you knew it, the tone of the kiss had changed to something so heated and animalistic that for a moment you feared he would go into a frenzy.

It subsided soon after, and he kissed a trail down your neck and across your shoulder where he had pulled your shirt collar to the side to access more of your skin.

“So, that makes us even, right?” You teased and Gary hummed to acknowledge he was listening to you when he was in fact not, more busy trying to place his lips and scrape his teeth against any part of your shoulder he could get to. “Hey.” You tugged on the pointed end of his ear to get his attention. He grunted and moved away from your ruined shirt collar to look at you, his eyes filled with annoyance and adoration at the same time.

“That makes us even? I kissed you- you kissed me?” You asked again while playing with the edges of his now half-undone tie. That dark yet playful, and what you could now see as possessive demeanor took over him again as suddenly picked you up, then maneuvered you both so that you were against the headboard and he was leaning over you, making you feel surrounded by him. “I’m afraid not. What you should’ve found out before pulling that little stunt of yours is that I charge interest, sweetheart.”

Gary pushed himself to be chest to chest with you before giving you another kiss, this one as possessive as the rest of his mood. He broke it only briefly after the first few passes to growl in a sinfully monstrous tone, “And, you’re gonna be payin’ it back for a long time.”

[jazzthatonewriterchick]

Lovers & Friends (18+ Fic)

Pairing: Keigo Takami x Black!Fem!Reader (Friends to Lovers)

Synopsis: In which you and Keigo have begun to realize the strange new feelings you both have for each other after one drunken night at a close friend’s wedding that ends with you in his bed, but because of your longtime friendship and committed relationships with other people, you’re more than happy to forget that night even happened and keep your mutual feelings in the dark…for now, at least. 

Story Warnings: Smutty smut; 18+ (MINORS GET AWAY); Cheating/Infidelity; Mating; Light Degradation; Spanking; Exhibitionism; Multiple Positions; Creampie; Unprotected PIV Sex; Facials; Scent Play; Marking; Spitting; Deepthroating; Cunnilingus; Begging; Edgeplay; Power Play; Daddy Kink; Some Angst; Hurt/Comfort; Mild Violence

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic (except for Rei and Haruko). However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!

Writer's Note: Got myself a job!! I'm so excited but I'm also shitting myself lmaoo but I'm still gonna try to update as frequently as I can. Enjoy! -Jazz

Chapters: One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Fifteen. Sixteen. Seventeen. Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty. Bonus Chapter.

Read on AO3 here!

************

Chapter Three: Those Bachelor Days Don't Last Forever.

Keigo sits on the edge of his king-sized bed in his master bedroom feeling sick. Is it weird for the best man to get cold feet and he isn’t the one getting married? 

Well, that’s exactly how he feels now, dressed in his best Armani suit with a pink flower nestled in his breast pocket in accordance with the color scheme of the wedding. He sits with his legs wide and his head down, feeling like the entire world is crashing around him. 

“Baby!” Sakura calls from down the hall in one of Keigo’s three bathrooms. “How much time do we have left? My hair isn’t working with me today.” He hears her grunt in frustration and the sound of a hairspray can fills the air. She’s been in there for nearly an hour getting ready for Fatgum’s wedding, prepping herself as Keigo’s plus-one. 

“Twenty minutes!” he calls back, checking his Rolex watch. “You’ve got time.” And so does he. Thank God because he has to get his shit together. He has to be the best best man for his friend today despite having never been a best man before. 

But he knows this isn’t the main reason why he’s ready to blow chunks all over his red-bottom shoes. He doesn’t hate weddings either. He went to Yu and Nemuri’s wedding two years ago and had the best time of his life stuffing his face with cake, downing all the champagne, and taking home two of the hot waitresses catering the event. 

He knows his anxiety has a lot to do with his conversation with him and his friends last night which led to him coming home early and fucking Sakura’s brains out just to prove to himself that Fatgum wasn’t right.

He had met up with him late last night for Fatgum’s bachelor’s party, which was really just a trip for some ramen dinner and then a game of pool at Fatgum’s favorite high-end bar. It was located in a fancy hotel across the city. Fatgum drank, ate, and rented rooms free since he saved the hotel from a villain attack years ago when a bomb was built under the building. 

The conversations went from 0 to about 1,000 when the drinks kept pouring and the hours kept ticking down till the wedding. Fatgum was happy, giddy even, as he leaned against the pool table in his skinnier form. “Ah, I can’t believe it,” he sighed. “I’ll really be a married man soon! I get to be with the most amazing woman for the rest of my life!” 

“Rest of your life?” Keigo parroted, scoffing at the statement. “C’mon, man, don’t get ahead of yourself. That’s talkin’ forever.” 

“Exactly!” Fatgum gave him a big, happy grin that was so full of love and bliss, it nearly killed Keigo’s buzz. “Haruko is the one I wanna be with forever. I wouldn’t have proposed if I didn’t see us together for all that time, and I plan on havin’ that woman till I sprout grays.” 

“Not to be a downer or anything,” Toshinori aka All Might said from his spot next to Aizawa aka Eraserhead, busy taking his turn at the pool table, “but you do realize that forever for a pro is limited ‘cause of multiple things, right?” He started ticking off the number of possible threats on his fingers. “Villian attacks, missions gone wrong, crazed fans. The list goes on.” 

“Oh, come on, fellas!” Hizashi aka Present Mic (Mic for short) said from his spot on his stool, sipping from his cocktail with a little umbrella in it. “Don’t rain on poor Fatgum’s parade! I think it’s a wonderful thing to want that with someone. Just look at me and Shouta: six years strong.” He flashed the crew his gold band and grinned at a blushing Aizawa. 

“I get what you’re sayin’, Toshi,” Fatgum said genuinely, patting Toshinori on the back, “and as much I appreciate your honesty, I already know my time may be limited on this earth. That’s why I’m makin’ it count. With my Haruko.” He sighed dreamily; a picture of being in love. “She’s my forever, however long that may be for however long she wants me.” 

Keigo felt something shift inside of him at those words. He realized with a shock that it was jealousy. But who wouldn’t be jealous of a cute ass relationship like Fatgum and Haruko’s? They’d been together for six years, fighting through the ups and downs, the good and bad. Keigo couldn’t imagine being married and doing that. To him, marriage was the ultimate commitment. 

And he wasn’t good at commitment. His list of past relationships that could stretch from Japan to Antarctica would tell you that shit. You, Dabi, and Rumi made fun of him for having “international community dick” because Keigo has seen it all, done it all. As a pro hero, he’s traveled the world for business deals and important meetings, and in every place, he’s had at least one body. 

Keigo just isn’t for relationships. He loved his freedom too much–the freedom to jump from one person to the next in any city or country he wanted. He always figured he was too busy with his hero work to focus on falling in love. He just dated for a good time, which was usually a good fuck that lasted him one night or a few weeks. 

That is until you fell for you. He still doesn’t know when he started falling or how. All he remembers is looking at you one day and thinking, “Damn, she’s beautiful” and then “Damn, I really love her”. 

When he realized what happened, he freaked out. He couldn’t be in love, especially with his best friend! You shared too much together and your relationship was too amazing to be ruined. So he kept his feelings to himself all these years, knowing this love would remain unrequited and unspoken. 

But that doesn’t stop the daydreams of you and him together, you underneath him or him underneath you, your gorgeous face contorted in the pure ecstasy he gave you as he drives his cock into you again and again, making you cum like you’ve never cum before. That doesn’t stop him from wanting to hold you, or feel your lips against his, or feeling hot with jealousy at the other men you give your time to. 

That includes Rei aka Tempo. God, he hates your new man, but not just because he had you. To him, Rei seemed like a fake; like everything he did was for approval and validation, including what he did for you–the dates, the gifts, the cute little IG comments under your photos. It was all for show.

Keigo isn’t with that. You deserve better than that. And now that he knows the dude can’t make you cum, he’s definitely tempted to ruin your relationship with him. But Keigo also isn’t an asshole. He’s also a good friend and wants to see you happy, no matter how much it hurts to pretend. 

“Damn, Keigo, you good?” Ken Takagi aka Rock Lock, asked in concern as he sipped his beer. “You look like you’re about to deck somebody.”

Kan Sekijiro aka Vlad glared at Keigo from his spot at the pool table, his big frame nearly blocking Keigo from the game. “Better not be me if you know what’s good for you,” he grumbled.  

“Chill out, frost tips,” Keigo blandly replied. “I wouldn’t dream of fightin’ your big ass.” Vlad’s glare intensified while the others laughed. “And I’m fine, Ken; thanks for pointin’ that out,” Keigo sarcastically replied to his friend and coworker. He really wasn’t in the mood for this tonight. 

“I would’ve done it, but I didn’t feel like it,” Aizawa deadpanned from the bar. Mic nudged him roughly with his elbow. “Talk to us, Keigo!” he encouraged the winged pro. “What’s eatin’ at you? You don’t agree with someone being your forever?” 

Now the attention was all on Keigo. Usually, he liked it this way, but not right now. He was just trying to enjoy his friend’s bachelor party to celebrate his big day and then go home to have drunk, nasty sex with Sakura. But he knew with a crowd like this, he’d never get away from the topic of conversation.

“It’s not that,” he sighed, sitting on the corner of the table. “I, for one, would love to be with someone I feel like I can see my future with. But as a pro, being in a romantic relationship is difficult and exhausting. Complicates life too much. That’s why I always stuck to my hookups or flings.” 

“So what about Sakura?” Fatgum asked, raising an eyebrow. “Is she a fling or a hookup too?” 

She was, at first. Keigo met the pink, curly-haired cutie at a party he didn’t want to be at downtown (for a business deal) and they got to talking when he offered to buy her a drink after the bartender messed up her order. He was curious about her as soon as he got a look at her in her periwinkle dress that did wonders for her body.

He learned she was a nurse for sick children and her quirk allowed her to ease their pain and discomfort for a few hours by giving them bursts of pleasure in their bodies. He charmed her, danced with her, and managed to get into her bedroom when she invited him back to her place for the night. 

Sex with her is by far the best thing Keigo has ever experienced. Sakura used her quirk on him many times that night to increase his pleasure and gave him some mind-blowing orgasms in the process. To put it bluntly, he was hooked and started seeing her more and more. Unfortunately for him, his pimp shit was squashed when he got to know Sakura more and more. He became fond of her sweet personality and almost innocent outlook on life. He cared deeply for her. 

But while he cared, he knew that care didn’t amount to what he felt for you. He’d give you the whole moon and the sun if you asked. He’d gladly die and kill just to ensure your safety. He didn’t care–he just loved you. He knew he could never love Sakura or any other woman the way he loved you, but he could try. After all, he and you were friends. There was no way he could ever tell you how he truly left, and has been feeling for years. 

“She was supposed to be,” he admitted earnestly, “but after getting to know her, I found I really enjoyed talkin’ with her. She’s a sweet girl, don’t get me wrong…” He trailed off, not wanting to get into it, but already leaving breadcrumbs for his highly-interested audience.

“But?” Fatgum pushed. “I know there’s a “but” in there, Keigo. Don’t deny it.” 

Keigo sighed in frustration, knowing he’d look like a fuckboy for this. “I’m just with her for the fun of it!” he confessed with a shrug. “Nothing long-term or committed. I’m not gonna cheat or hurt her ‘cause I’m not a jerk, but I’m also not lookin’ for something for ‘forever’.” He used his fingers to quote the word, earning a perplexed scowl from Fatgum. “We just laugh, talk, and have a good time.” 

“You mean fuck?” Shouta asked blankly. Even Keigo flushed at the harshness of the word. “Well, if you wanna be blunt, sure.” 

“Keigo!” Fatgum gasped, looking at Keigo like he just admitted to murder. “I’m shocked! You’re really tellin’ me you’re not gonna try to lock a cutie like Sakura down? If you don’t do it now, you’ll regret it later.”

Keigo just waved off his friend’s statement, paying no time to the dramatics. “I don’t regret shit like that.” Fatgum shook his head in pity. “You will when you wind up cold and lonely in your big penthouse without someone to cuddle with.” 

The winged hero sucked his teeth, shaking his head at the others. He knew that wasn’t true. No matter how doomed he was to love you, he also knew he’d find someone else, especially in the future. There was no way he’d be alone forever…right? 

He decided to leave it alone as he waltzed over to the pool table for his turn. He leaned forward, stomach flat against the table, and aimed at a red pool table. It teetered to the right and rolled into two more balls. Once all three fell into the left pocket, he pumped his fist in victory. 

“Do you believe it’s possible to find the one for you somewhere out there?” Mic asked curiously from behind him. He turned around, slightly irked this conversation was still rolling, but he wasn’t going to blow Mic off. The guy was too nice! “I mean, sure,” he replied thoughtfully, “but I can’t just look for ‘the one’ in every single person I date.” 

Rock Lock nodded as he shoved Vlad out of the way to do his turn at the pool table. “I gotchu. You don’t date to marry; you date for fun. You’re still young, so it’s different for guys like us.”He took a shot at a blue ball, grinning when it rolled into the left pocket. 

“Exactly!” Keigo laughed, happy someone was seeing things from his perspective finally. “See? He gets it! I’m way too young and at the top of my game to be tied down right now.”

Fatgum turned to him, adding more of his two cents. “Be that as it may, Keigo,” he argued, “and while I totally respect our differences here, don’t you think you sound just a lil’...I don’t know…” He trailed off, looking for the right word. 

“Cynical?” Aizawa finished. Everyone’s eyes trained on him to which he passively shrugged. “What? He needed a word, I gave him one.” 

Keigo was irked at his friends’ assumptions about him, especially Fatgum. So what if he felt this way? So what if he liked his freedom and his sex? So what if he jumped from relationship to relationship to avoid thinking about you and being alone? It was no one’s business but his. “I’m just being honest,” he scoffed, downing his third beer of the night. 

“And I get that!” Fatgum replied, putting his hands up in defense. Sensing that his friend was feeling attacked, he put a hand on Keigo’s shoulder. “You’re totally entitled to feel how you feel, Keigo. And you’re right: you’re young, attractive, wealthy, and the second most popular pro in Japan. You’ve got brand deals, international fame…you’re the total package! A complete bachelor.” 

Keigo cringed slightly, not sure if he liked being called that. “But one day, all of this ain’t gonna be enough for you,” Fatgum continued a soft look in his eyes. “You’re gonna want something different. Someone who you can trust to love you and not judge you to share your life with.”

He squeezed Keigo’s shoulder, and Keigo felt like he was getting advice from his father. “Trust me; those bachelor days don’t last forever, my friend.” 

That night after going home to his penthouse, his relationships with you and Sakura sat on Keigo’s tipsy, fuzzy mind. Even as he sits here now, waiting for his girlfriend to finish up, he reflects on them heavily. While both have their fair share of positives, he also knows he could never have what he has with you with Sakura. 

He’s known you since middle school! Since the days of acne, schoolyard fights, and other adolescent cringe. You know him inside and out: all the ugly; the bad; the flaws that make him Keigo. You know of his hurts and pains; the childhood trauma that sometimes has him waking up in the middle of the night; the insecurities he has in himself that sometimes get him down. Plus, you understand the difficulties, horrors, and uncertainties that come with being a pro.

You understand why he stays away from romance and steers clear from falling in love. Sakura could never understand any of this, and he is sure if he tries to explain any of this to her, it’d turn her away for good. 

“Keigo?” 

Keigo jumps, nearly having a heart attack at the sound of Sakura standing in his bedroom. She’s dressed in a pale pink sundress that pairs well with her hair which cascades down her back in waves. She looks like a beautiful, pink angel wearing sandals and with lips that remind Keigo of berries.  “You alright?” she questions, worry in her eyes; those eyes like the cleanest, purest waters. 

Quickly, he stands and clears his throat. No time to reflect on his future and lament his love life. He has a wedding to go to. “Yeah,” he assures her with a smile. As if throwing him a bone, his phone dings, signaling the arrival of the car he ordered twenty minutes ago. “Good, the car is around the corner. We should head downstairs.” 

He goes to Sakura and wraps an arm around her lower waist. He presses a kiss to her lips, breathing in her scent of rose-scented perfume. “You look amazing, by the way. Maybe those two hours in the bathroom were what you needed.”

Sakura laughs and nudges him as they venture down the winding staircase to catch their ride. 

************

Fatgum and Haruko’s wedding reception is thrown in downtown Musutafu at the largest park in the city.

When Keigo gets out of the car and helps Haruko out of the backseat, he can see his friend broke his bank for the occasion. During wedding rehearsals (which occurred a week before the wedding and Fatgum’s bachelor party), their chosen portion of the park wasn’t yet decorated or littered with guests. But now, the place looks like something out of a damn Disney movie. 

A trail of white satin leads to the area under a canopy of trees winded with fairy lights where the bride and groom will soon stand in front of seats reserved for specific guests from the front to the back.

A few yards away, and a walk away from the park’s parking lot, are the bar, bathrooms, and dance floor littered with white table-clothed tables and chairs for after the wedding reception. Among all of that are rolling hills of freshly cut, green grass and gazebos that will make for great photos. A few white tents litter the area as well, two of which Keigo is sure are reserved for the bride and groom. 

When Keigo and Sakura walk into the wedding hand-in-hand, people are already setting up. A live band sets up their instruments while the priest stands at his post, reading over his lines. Guests are busy finding their seats, among them being fellow pro heroes, Fatgum’s and Haruko’s family and friends outside of the hero industry, and some UA students Keigo recognizes. 

He instantly sees Ejriou Kirishima and Tamaji Amijiki, Fatgum’s prodigies. He winks at the two UA students, earning an overly-excited wave from Kiri in his suit while Tamaki looks like he wishes he wasn’t there. Off to the side near the punch bowls, Hitoshi Shinso is kneeling in front of little Eri, Aizawa and Mic’s daughter, fixing up her dress littered with blooming flowers as she giggles. 

“Let’s get a drink,” Keigo suggests to Sakura to which she agrees. As they walk over to the mini bar for water or maybe a soda, Keigo is immediately ambushed by his friends. Yu aka Mt. Lady, in her normal form, practically runs over to them in a flowing purple dress and her creamy blonde hair tied in a French braid. “Heeey!” she sing-songs, already tipsy with champagne. “There’s my favorite couple!” 

She throws herself at them, nearly breaking Keigo’s neck. “You say that about every couple you know, Yu,” he grunts while Sakura giggles, hugging her back. Yu pouts. “Well, I can’t help that I love love!” she protests. “Baby, tell Keigo to stop bullying me!” 

On cue, Nemuri aka Ms. Midnight steps into the scene with her beautiful and busty self. She decided to go for a nice cobalt blue dress with a slit at the thigh while her hair is pinned back into a curly updo. “My, look at the sights here,” she purrs playfully. She gives Sakura a hug. “You look absolutely amazing, darling. That dress goes with your hair so much.”

Sakura blushes, happy with the compliment. Nemuri smirks at Keigo, a hand on her hip. “Hawks, you’re looking quite dapper today. I’m not used to seeing you without your goggles or a box of fried chicken in your hands.” 

Keigo raises a brow at her, wondering why she wants violence so early in the day. “And I see you ditched the kinky collar for today’s festivities,” he retorts, nodding at her neck. “That’s sayin’ you didn’t bring it with you.” 

“Oh, we did!” Yu says a little too loudly. “Nemuri insisted we take it with us for later.” Nemuri’s face turns as pink as Sakura’s hair while Keigo gives a big, bellied laugh, leaning back as he does. “Alright, alright, take that horny shit somewhere else,” Rumi grumbles, stepping over to shoo the two women away. Yu sticks her tongue out at the bunny hero, but leaves with Nemuri anyway, a hand on her waist. 

Rumi eyes Keigo and Sakura, a playful smirk on her face adorned in soft makeup for the occasion. She went for a one-shouldered red dress that stops just above her muscular thighs and pumps that make her much taller than Keigo. But even with her normal height, the girl is an amazon. “Well, fancy seein’ you two here.” 

“You too, cottontail,” Keigo replies, giving her that same sly smirk. “Where’s your date at?” Rumi gets a devilish look in her eyes as she sips her glass of champagne. “Oh, I’ll be findin’ her after the reception.”  

“And you call Yu and Nemuri horny,” he scoffs. Sakura suddenly taps him on the shoulder, pointing at a nearby outhouse. “Keigo, I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick before the reception starts.”

He nods and they share a short kiss before he watches her walk away. Rumi watches her too before her eyes tick back to Keigo. “She looks really nice today. Surprised you even let us see her.” She chuckles despite Keigo’s eye roll. “Y’know, for a while, I thought she wasn’t real.” 

“Gimme that,” Keigo grumbles, snatching the champagne glass from her and taking a sip. He wasn’t planning on drinking so early, but he might have to. “Anyway, where’s your roomie? If you’re here, ain’t she here too?” 

He looks for you among the guests, figuring you might be with Rei. “She’s runnin’ late for some reason,” Rumi explains. Keigo scowls at her in confusion and she passively shrugs, crossing her muscular arms. “Kenji came over when I left early to help with decorations, I dunno. Maybe call the girl and find out.” 

Keigo almost doesn’t want to. He has a feeling you’re late for a reason. Maybe you and Rei are fighting? Does he have to pull up and beat some ass, he wonders? Before he can contemplate calling, one of the wedding organizers hurries over to him and Rumi.

“There you are!” he sighs in relief. “We’re gonna start setting up for the reception, so we need you with the other best men.” Keigo winks at Rumi before sauntering off. “Duty calls!” he yells to her over his shoulder. “See you later on the floor!” 

Quickly, he is whisked over to the reception area where most of the guests are seated and the band is readying to begin. When he shows up with the other best men, most of them being pros that he knows, he claps his hand with Fatgum and congratulates him on soon being a married man which Fatgum, in his suit, nearly cries about (the man is very emotional). Afterward, he stands at his post with the others while the bridesmaids face them from the other side where Haruko will soon be. 

Taking advantage of the freedom he has now, he slides his phone out of his pocket and calls you. You don’t pick up on the first ring which is unusual for you unless you’re at work. So Keigo immediately knows something is up. 

You pick up on the fourth ring. “Hello?” you answer, sounding less than pleased. Hearing your biting tone, warning alarms begin to blare in Keigo’s head. Maybe he really will have to beat some ass. Where’s Dabi at today? Maybe he’d be able to help Keigo bust some ass if he the pro can successfully bribe the warden. 

“Hey, where you at?” he whispers into the phone before he can get any other murderous thoughts. “The wedding is starting soon.” You sigh in frustration, making his stomach roil anxiously. “Rei lost his wallet, so we’re gonna be late,” you explain in a huff. “Just save me a seat at the bar when it ends. And take pictures.” 

Though Keigo is disappointed in the outcome of things so far, he promises to do so and hangs up before the wedding can start. It does so about fifteen minutes later. As soon as the band begins their rendition of “Here Comes the Bride”, Keigo’s stomach drops and he stands rigid as if he’s the one getting married.

Fatgum stands with the priest, his hands folded behind his back and trying to appear calm, but Keigo can see that the man is sweating through his suit. Eri comes out in her cute, frilly dress and sprinkles flowers along the floor before she’s scooped up by Aizawa and is sat down in one of the guest chairs. 

Then, finally, Haruko enters with her father, locked arm in arm. The guests stand and turn to the bridge, watching as she waltzes in wearing her flowing white dress adorned in lace and holding a bouquet of red roses that match her waves of red hair. She walks slowly, taking her sweet time. 

But as she does, Keigo notices something: while everyone’s eyes are on her, including Fatgum, her eyes stay strictly transfixed on her soon-to-be-husband, her stare never breaking for a moment. It is as if he is the only one in the room to her. No one else matters. “Isn’t she beautiful?” he hears one of the guests whisper to the other. 

He blinks and suddenly, he is not looking at Haruko in her wedding dress, but at you. You stand there, glowing and radiant in white, your pretty brown eyes staring up at him as you stand together in front of the priest, ready to become one. 

‘Yeah,’ he thinks to himself with a soft smile. ‘She absolutely is.’ 

[paralleljulieverse]

This Week in Julie History: Coronation Night Gala Supper Dance and All-Star Cabaret, Cumberland Hotel, 2 June 1953

Seventy years ago, in June 1953, London pulsated with the exhilarating energy of Coronation Week. Just as witnessed during the recent ascension of King Charles, crowds thronged the flag-bedecked streets of the capital, hearts ablaze with patriotic pride, waiting for a glimpse of their new young Queen Elizabeth II.  Numerous celebrations filled the Coronation Week of 1953, ranging from quaint neighbourhood street parties to grand, opulent balls. Almost every hotel and restaurant across the city curated special coronation-themed events. Among these, the Cumberland Hotel, located in the upscale Marble Arch district, offered a notable highlight with a magnificent Gala Supper Dance and Dinner. 

Tickets for the gala were priced at 5 gns—approximately £200 in today's terms—so it was clearly a high-end affair. But for their money, guests were indulged with a gourmet six-course supper featuring suitably coronation-themed dishes such as Le blanc de poularde Reine Elizabeth -- Queen Elizabeth chicken breast -- served with Windsor Pearls and Royal Potatoes. Enhancing the experience, guests were also treated to a cocktail on arrival, half-bottle of vintage champagne and after-supper liqueurs.

A superbly curated All-Star Cabaret performance served as a delightful accompaniment to the evening's supper. Compered by celebrated magician, Billy McComb, it featured a line-up of top variety entertainers including comedian Reg Dixon; radio impressionist Peter Cavanagh, the singing duo, Jack and Daphne Barker, and ‘Britain’s youngest soprano’, Julie Andrews.

That Julie was contracted as one of the gala’s headliners attests to her rising professional stock in the era. Now aged 17, she was fast moving beyond the child star persona of her early career and events such as this cabaret marked a pivot to a more mature and sophisticated style.

Unfortunately, as she relates in the first volume of her memoirs, Julie didn’t actually make it to the Cumberland Hotel that night due to a car breakdown:

“There were many glamourous events and galas during the time of the coronation, and my mother and I were invited to perform one evening at a hotel on Park Lane. We set off in Bettina, our trusty car. There was a low bridge on the way to London, where the road took a huge dip. We were decked out in our best attire, and as happens so often in England, it was simply teeming with rain. Ahead of us, under the bridge, was a vast body of water. “Oh, just plow through it,” I advised Mum. “If we go fast enough, we ’ll come out the other side.” Mum gunned the engine, and Bettina came to a hissing stop right in the middle of the pool. Her motor had completely flooded. Dressed in our finery, we waded out of the deep water and stumbled to a garage to ask for the car to be towed to safety. We never did make the concert” (2008, 154).

There is no record of how Julie’s absence was conveyed to the crowd at the Cumberland or what their response was...but we’d have been crying into our five guinea half-bottle of vintage champagne!

Sources:

Andrews, Julie (2008). Home: A memoir of my early years. London: Weidenfeld and Nicolson.

Bartlett School (2023). Survey of London: Vol 11 Histories of Oxford Street. Bartlett School of Architecture, University College London.

Cumberland Hotel (1953). A souvenir of the coronation of Queen Elizabeth II. London.

Evening Standard, 27 April 1953: 2.

Copyright © Brett Farmer 2023

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 1/5

Book Blurb: Equal parts hilarious and heartbreaking, this inventive queer romance asks what it means to be truly happy.

Tegan Masters is dead.   

She’s sixteen and she’s dead and she’s standing in the parking lot of the Marybelle Motor Lodge, the single most depressing motel in all of New Jersey and the place where Tegan spent what she remembers as the worst weekend of her life.  

In the front office, she meets Zelda, an annoyingly cute teen angel with a snarky sense of humor and an epic set of wings. According to Zelda, Tegan is in heaven, where every person inhabits an exact replica of their happiest memory. For Tegan, Zelda insists, that place is the Marybelle—creepy minigolf course, sad breakfast buffet, filthy swimming pool, and all. 

Tegan has a few complaints about this. 

When Tegan takes these concerns up with Management, she and Zelda are sent on a whirlwind tour through Tegan’s memories, in search of clues to help her understand what mattered most to her in life. If Zelda fails to convince Tegan (and Management) that the Marybelle was the site of Tegan's perfect moment, both girls face dire eternal consequences. But if she succeeds…they just might get their happily-ever-afterlife. 

A tender and edgy take on coming of age in the afterlife.

Review:

When you die at 16, the last thing you expect is that your "heaven" is a ratty motel and now you have complaints with the angel management to deal with and memory lane to stroll down with with an annoyingly cute angel. Tegan Masters is 16 and she's dead. She wakes up to find herself at the Marybelle Motor Lodge, the most depressing hotel ever and when an angel appears and tells her its the "happiest memory" she has, Tegan has some complaints. Now she has to stroll down memory lane because this isn't her happiest memory and she wants to find her one happy memory... but when she does, will she get her happily ever after? This one was definitely for younger YA readers and unfortunately it just wasn't for me. I was lured in by a cute cover and a potential sapphic romance but this one just felt really dull and boring to read. I felt myself checking out and skimming parts to just make it to the end. It really just wasn't for me and it kind of missed the mark on all my expectations. While this was a miss for me, if you enjoy afterlife stories, give this a go!

*Thanks Netgalley and Holiday House / Peachtree / Pixel+Ink | Holiday House for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[umichenginabroad]

The Markets and the Grill (Week 13)

Back in Coogee! After over a week of traveling, it was time to rest. Classes continued as normal and everyone’s desire to fervently enjoy our home, Coogee beach and Sydney, returned. Tuesday was marked by trivia at the Coogee Bay Hotel. Our 3rd place finish granted us a $25 gift card split six ways, so we were practically swimming in our winnings. On Wednesday I went exploring with Lauren and, like usual, we came across more of Sydney’s hidden gems such as Hyde Park and the neighboring Cathedral. St Mary’s Cathedral might as well be located in the winding streets of Spain with how much it resembles the cathedrals scattered throughout Europe. Just take a look for yourself!

On Saturday, a few of us market-lovers headed off to the Glebe Markets where incredible artisans and undiscovered chefs celebrate their passions by selling their work at stalls. I was personally more than happy to celebrate with a Turkish Gozleme full of chicken, spinach, and mushrooms. From Glebe, we made our way to the Paddington Markets which displayed more of the same. This time, I celebrated with two of the yummiest falafel pitas! I was particularly interested in a booth containing black-and-white photos of Sydney’s eastern suburbs from the 1900s. Having spent my limited time here, it was mesmerizing to see how much Coogee has changed in the last hundred years. The most notable change being the removal of a massive dock splitting the beach right in half. I was also surprised to see that the beach was just as packed back then as it is now!

Conveniently, nearby there was someone selling copies of their artwork portraying different neighborhoods of Sydney, so I made sure to get one of Coogee to commemorate my time living there. The Glebe and Paddington Markets are just two of several that Sydney showcases on a weekly basis. If you ever find yourself in town, make sure to visit at least one of them! 

On Sunday, we woke up and claimed one of the public grills on the grass just above the beach! Scattered around the beaches and parks, Sydney has conveniently located free-to-use public grills which are always full of families or groups of friends picnicking, grilling, and clearly enjoying themselves. It was only a matter of time before we could make it happen. It was food galore. We had corn, burgers, veggie skewers, hotdogs, career salad, toasted buns, chicken skewers, watermelon, a chocolate pastry, and more I’m sure I’m forgetting. Between the grilling, the food, the beautiful weather, the beachside view, and the company, we were really living the dream. Better yet, we followed up with a game of volleyball on the beach, and then a dip and rock scramble in the rock pools. The day simply could not have gone any better, and I have the hostel to thank for that. Living with a group of 18 other students studying abroad, eager to get out there and have fun has truly made my time here. I can’t wait for our remaining adventures together as our final month approaches. Cheers!

David Bayer

Biomedical Engineering

University of New South Wales in Sydney, Australia

[agirlwithbigdreamsforher]

CABO

THE NANNY: ONE SHOT

CABO!

Pairing: Andy Barber x Annie Johnson (OFC)

Summary: Brownies aren’t harmful or are they? This is set after their graduation.

Warnings: mentions of drugs and being high as a kite. Video call sex.

A/N:  English is not my first language, any mistakes are my own.

Disclaimer: I do not give permission for any of my works to be copied, used, translated nor reposted anywhere else but here on this blog. Do not steal what you didn’t work for. Minors and ageless blank blogs don’t interact with me or my works. Reblogs and likes are always welcome. Thank you for reading this work of fiction.

Word count: 1849

GIF not mine. You can find the credits of the GIF underneath it.

                                     ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Annie was lounging in her chair, sunglasses on, enjoying of the sun light to the fullest. Sharon and Mark were at the pool bar getting drinks and talking to some people they met the night before at a club. Annie was just relaxing when all of the sudden her stomach growled, she sat down and reached for Sharon’s tote bag, she knew Sharon might have something to eat, she always did. It wasn’t long before Annie found a cellophane bag with a brownie inside. She opened and proceeded to eat it.

“Margarita for An…What are you doing?!” Mark said

“Eating.” She took the last piece of brownie and shoved to her mouth.

“Oh god. Did you really eat the whole thing?!”

“Well, yeah. You know me, brownie, chocolate, couldn’t resist.”

Sharon came walking holding her drink, “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Mark grabbed by her arm and walked a bit away from Annie who was now drinking her margarita.

“She ate the brownie, the whole brownie.”

“What brownie?”

“I bought a brownie when we went out last night.”

“Argh, big deal, she ate your brownie, buy a new one! Don’t be selfish!”

“No, it was a special brownie, and she ate it all!”

Sharon just stared to Mark, his words sinking in to her head, “OH!” She turned to see Annie, “How much time do we have before she starts to feel funny?”

“I don’t know, you’re supposed to eat just a small bite.”

It was just 15 minutes later when Annie laughed out of nowhere. Mark and Sharon shared a worried look, then Annie stood and tried to walk but then again she laughed.

“Hey, what’s so funny?” Mark asked.

“The ants are tickling my feet.” She giggled.

“We better take her to the room.” Sharon said and stood to grab her friend and made her walk towards the hotel. “What were you thinking? Why didn’t you tell me you put it in my bag?!” Sharon said as Annie put her weight against her.

“In my defense I never thought she will find it and eat it.” Mark answer as he hold Annie for the waist.

“She had never had pot before!”

“And how was I supposed to know she was going to eat the whole brownie.”

“I love you guys, so, so much!” Annie said as she burst out laughing.

“Yeah, we love you too, we need to take to you the room.” Mark said.

“I love the room!” Annie said overly excited.

They walked carrying Annie to the many halls of the hotel in Mexico, everyone staring at them as Annie kept laughing or singing as they pretty much dragged her.

“If Andy finds out, he is going to kill us!” Sharon said as Mark opened the door. “No, wait! You! He is gonna kill you! And trust me I will not save you!”

“He is never gonna know. It will be our little secret.” Mark carried Annie to bed. “Ok, you are staying here, we will come back in a couple of hours, try to sleep. Do you understand?” Annie lifted her thumbs up and nodded with her eyes closed. “Perfect! If you need anything you call us, ok?” She nodded as Mark gave her her phone. “Come on. She will be better when she wakes up.”

They left leaving Annie in bed high as a kite, she sat down and turned the TV on.

“Pretty pictures.” She mumbled as the images on TV moved in slow motion.

She then turned to her right, the room phone on the nightstand. She pick up and then she heard a voice.

“Hotel Riu Palace, ¿en qué podemos ayudarle?”

“Ammm, no Spanish… spañol…” The truth was Annie actually spoke a bit of Spanish, enough to communicate but she didn’t know where her Spanish went because she couldn’t remember any words as much as she tried.

“Oh! No problem miss! How can I help you?”

“M’hungry.”

“Very well, anything in particular you want to eat?”

“Pizza.”

“Alright miss, I will pass your order to the kitchen and it will be up in 20 minutes tops. Anything else I can help you with?”

“Nop! Gracies!”

She kept watching TV as she waited for her pizza for what she felt was 3 hours. Her body was tingling, it was like ants were walking over her skin and she felt extremely relaxed.  She was dozing off when a knock on the door alert her.

“Room service!”

She walked towards the door and carefully open the door.

“Miss, did you order a pizza?”

“I like pizza.”

“Good! Can I come in so I let your pizza on the table?”

“You stranger, no coming in.”

“Mmmm well, I can just give you the plate then?” Annie nodded and the guy on the other side of the door passed her the plate with the pizza. “Enjoy your meal!”

“Wait!” Annie let her plate on the bed and took a 100 dollar bill and gave it to the guy at the door. “Thank you!”

“Miss, this is too…” Annie closed the door in his face, “much.” He shrugged and left.

Annie laid down in bed again, putting the plate on her tummy and began to eat. It was the best pizza she had ever tasted, all the flavors danced in her mouth as she bite the dough with cheese. She took her phone as she kept chewing her pizza and dial Andy’s phone.

Andy was at home, it was a Saturday afternoon after all. Jake was napping after a long day at soccer practice when he saw the picture of Annie on the screen of his phone. A facetime call, how cute, Andy thought.

“Hi, honey!” Andy could only see Annie’s forehead, “Amm honey?”

“Baby! Hi! Where are you?”

“Honey, put your phone away from your face, I can’t see you.” Annie moved her phone her droopy face now on full display, “There she is! How is Cabo?”

“Baby, I have to tell you… bout the best pizza ever!” She dragged her words as she bite the pizza.

“Ammm ok, how is this pizza?”

“I don’t know! But it’s soooo delicious.”

“Honey, are you ok? You sound off.”

“M’fine! I was at the pool and then I was hungry and had a brownie and then I ate pizza.”

“What brownie?” Andy raised his brow.

“You know, the chocolate one. Uh! It had chips on it!”

“Honey, are you high?”

“No, I’m in bed! Bed no high!” She burst out laughing when she said that.

“My god, you are fucking high!”

“You fucking high!” She tried to imitate his worried voice and then laughed again.

“Honey, listen to me, I need you to go to the bathroom and made yourself throw up ok?”

“Iugh! No vomit!” Annie then looked away and then again to the screen, “Baby! Where are you? I miss you!”

“I miss you too. But, hey tell me where you got this brownie.”

“It was in the bag.”

Andy knew he wasn’t going to get any information out of her in this state, so he just sighed and kept talking to her.

“Baby, do you think this looks good?” She grabbed her boobs, pushed them together and pulled her bikini, the red fabric barely covering her soft brown nipples that Andy loved so much. He could already see the tan lines on her skin.

“Hmmm, looks very good actually.” Andy had a dark thought, “You look really sexy. How about if you show me the other half.”

Annie nodded eagerly and placed her phone in the bed, she turned and showed him her ass; her bottom was a tropic cut that was now sticking between her butt cheeks.

“Fuck, honey.” Andy’s hand reached for his semi hard dick in his grey pants. “You look amazing.”

Andy saw Annie pulled the strings on her top and bottom, she wiggled the clothes away, turned and made herself comfortable against the pillows. Andy was hard by now, his hand in his pants squeezing his cock.

“Open those legs for me baby, come on.”

She did as she was told, her left hand going to her breast, while the right hand went down to touch her clit using her middle finger.

“Fuck!” Annie moaned, her small circles soon enough became faster.

Andy took off his sweatpants, his cock throbbing in his hand as he stroke it and the red tip began to leaked. His gaze fixed on the screen of his phone, watching every move Annie made, her fingers went south to touch her entrance. Andy was mesmerized watching how two of her small fingers disappear in her warm, wet hole.

“Yes, honey, fuck yourself, come on.” Andy said as he kept stroking his cock. “Imagine those fingers is my cock.” Annie moaned loud. “You like that?”

“Yes! Oh god!” Annie’s pace raised, her fingers coming in and out of her sloppy cunt. “Andy!”

“Yeah, that’s right baby, I know you’re close. Touch your clit, honey.”

Annie’s left hand went down to touch her bundle of nerves, electricity running through her body as she touched it slightly and her fingers kept coming in and out.

“Yes, honey. Just like that. You’re doing so well.”

Annie’s moans grew lauder as her climax approached. Her tights shook when the pleasure wave hit her body. A hollow moan filling the room. Andy grunted as he came in his hand and stomach making a mess with his white load.

Both panted and took deep breaths as they came down of their high. Andy smiled when he saw Annie’s thighs were still shaking a bit a lazy smile on her lips. He stood up and went to the bathroom to clean himself up and put his pants back on. When he came back Annie was still where he left her.

“Honey?”

“Hmmm?” She hummed sleepily.

“Pick up the phone.”

She did and look at the screen, her hair was a mess. Andy found endearing and cute the redness in her nose and cheeks.

“Ok, honey. Listen to me. You are gonna drink water, and then I need you to go to sleep.”

She nodded “I feel sick.” She whispered.

“I know, I promise it’ll pass if you sleep.”

She followed his instructions, Andy never ending the call, waiting for her to come back to bed. She laid down, cover her naked body with the white sheet, her eyes heavy with sleep.

“Promise to stay with me until I fall asleep.”

“I’ll be here, honey”

10 minutes passed and Annie was fully sleep now, she looked at peace which made Andy smiled lovingly. He was about to end the call when he heard two voices.

“Hey, look, she is actually sleeping.” Sharon whispered.

“Thank god! I was worried she might done something crazy.”

“Hey, you two!” Andy said a bit loud and Annie groaned.

Sharon looked down at Annie’s phone in her hand and picked it up.

“Oh, hi, Andy! Were you guys talking? That’s so cute!”

“Whose brownie did she eat?!”

“You’re doomed.” Sharon said as she passed the phone to Mark.

“I can explain!”

[hardcore-lonewolf]

💋Bad Girls💋: A Teen Titans & Young Justice Cross-Over Fan-Fiction One-Shot (TUMBLR)

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PLOT: This group of eight chicks are getting ready for their slumber party and got some lingerie for themselves rather than their boyfriends. A band of eight dudes are curious about their girlfriends and their tea time, so these men dug into some private plans to find their women's juicy kinks and uncover some hidden secrets. In order to do that, these gents must follow and spy on their ladies throughout their overnight weekends at Paradise City, where the saints and sinners come to play mind games for fun. These guys got an undercover mission to get answers and interrogate their lovers on some certain questions that never asked during their relationships (marriages and engagements). These divas find out and are now crossing the next evil deeds that popped into their minds...some dirty things and some crazy habits in that gave them some vintage bad bitch vibes. Let's find out what these heroines got in store for these heroes and how they'll react.

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⚠WARNING⚠: THIS IS SET IN THE FUTURE LIKE "BEN 10K" TIMES, I CHOSE TO PUT EVA NELSON (FUTURE GWEN) AND RACHEL ROTH UP FOR THAT REASON. THE TEAM AND THE TITANS ARE NOW ADULTS, WHICH DOESN'T MEAN THAT THEY STOPPED BEING FRIENDS AND ALLIES...THEY'RE CLOSER THAN THAT. THIS CONTAINS MOSTLY MENTIONS OF ROUGH SMUT THAT'LL BE VERY IMPLIED OR THE REAL DEAL, A BIT DARK ANGST CAUSE THESE STRONG MEN ARE VERY OVERPROTECTIVE WITH THEIR TOUGH WOMEN, SOME HARD CRACK THAT WILL HURT ME TO DEATH BY LAUGHTER, AND A FEW SOFT FLUFF MOMENTS THAT ARE LOVING AND CARING WHEN THESE BOYS GET COMFORTED BY THESE GIRLS. IT MAKES ME NOT REGRETTING ANY WAY POSSIBLE WITH MY WORDS AND STUFF.

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"The men are stuck on a weekend mission overnight at Las Vegas, which leaves us by ourselves and drinking wine coolers on a cruise ship from LA to Tokyo. We can stay in this fucking tower and be bored as hell, or we'll do my list of things that'll make Kaldur swimming back home faster than Wally speeding throughout Mexico for nachos." Wonder Woman II (OFC: Ophelia Trevor) said while setting her bottle down and grabbing her list. "Here's the things women would do to look hot and sexy for their men. We're doing this and I don't give a damn...we need fresh air for gods' sake."

Black Cat (OFC: Eva Nelson), Tigress, Miss Martian, Zatanna, Rocket, Fire Goddess II (Starfire), and White Raven stared at the list and read it to themselves. They froze with reddened cheeks and their face formed into sly looks with mad grins on their faces. Wonder Woman put the list down and gave them an evil smirk in response to theirs.

Karaoke bars, night clubs, pole dances, music studios, fashion shows, spa resorts, hair salons, poker games, vintage cars, hotel rooms, flower gardens, jewelry stores, casino houses, beauty markets, beach parties, island pools, hot tubs, tattoo parlors, piercing outlets, erotic dens, nail shops, and strip joints.

"We're in," the demigoddess let them follow her and got in some clothes she gave them for Saturday night's neon lights party in Jump City.

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When it reached Saturday night, the guys finished their missions and were surprised that their lovers aren't inside the Titan Tower nor on the Central Island. Nightwing found a sticky note with a matte black lipstick kiss mark on it and read it. He nodded and handed the note to Aquaman II (Jackson Hyde), who recognized his beloved wife the new Wonder Woman's handwriting.

"Hello boys, it seems y'all finished the mission early, don't worry about us, we're currently at that neon lights club dressed up and letting ourselves enjoy some time. If you're reading this Kaldur, you better not let yourself and the rest of the guys catch us there. We're that easy to spot, but you men must be tired and exhausted. The ladies and I got some special presents for y'all, yet it won't happen cause a certain blue bird couldn't keep his thoughts to himself. You boys can drag us back all you want, we'll be running and hiding all night. Once y'all gents find all of us, the ladies and I will be good for you...as long as you perverts tell us why y'all always spy on us during our tea time. Have fun trying to catch us...sincerely yours, your beloved wife Ophelia Stephanie Hyde."

"They're partying at the Neon Lights Club in Jump City," Flash III (Wally West) said as he found the location and showed Nightwing.

"Those women will forever be the death of us," Breach (OMC: Nate Davenport) muttered under his breath, earning a nod from Steel Scion (Superboy I).

Hardware II (Cyborg I), Changeling, and Sentinel (OMC: Matt Ferris) followed Breach to the Zeta Tube while the rest stayed to discuss the women's punishments for lying about their whereabouts. Sentinel opens the location and the heroes headed on the streets of Jump City. The men found the club and walked inside without being caught.

"Now then, where's those girls at?" The girls heard their men and grew excited mixed with fear cause they knew that the boys won't hold back on being rough with them under the sheets.

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Wonder Woman shut the curtains and was a bit of afraid of her possessive husband Aquaman. Miss Martian, Fire Goddess (Starfire), Rocket, Tigress, Black Cat, Zatanna, and White Raven were blushing at how their lovers were prepared to take them home for some rough housing underneath the bedsheets all night long. The heroes were very obsessed and overprotective of their girls, they won't let any man or woman take them away.

"Let's do this number and give our men a good show." The heroines got to their places and were prepared for what they did behind their men's backs every time they by themselves.

"Remember girls, never let a person touch or feel, we let our lovers do that only and we'll be fine." They gulped nervously while stretching and taking deep breaths. "We're getting out of here when the curtain closes and we start running for it backstage to random spots in this club. Don't let them hear or see you...they know that this is a manhunt to them, our asses are doomed when they find all of us. Good luck and I pray to the gods that we can still walk straight after tonight."

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"Thanks," the bartender nodded after passing the heroes some cold water.

"The club got some girls to volunteer and perform some dancing for the crowd tonight. They go by Dahlia (Raven), Violet (Zatanna), Jasmine (Megan), Leilani (Artemis), Rosalie (Eva), Willow (Raquel), Heather (Opal), and Cassia (Kory) Motley of the Spectrum. They did some good dances on the tryouts and got in at first place, I saw those platinum rings with those white diamonds on their fingers and have told many people to try not getting on them cause they're taken. Whoever married or engaged to these ladies, those men are blessed and are proud to love women like them." The bartender explained to the heroes, not knowing that he's actually complimenting them and getting appreciative nods with smiles.

"Peforming on stage, the winners of the Neon Lights Club Dance-Off from last night...here's Spectrum!" The heroes froze to see their wives and lovers in disguise as the Spectrum.

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MAGENTA - EVA (OFC); RED - RAVEN; ORANGE - ARTEMIS ; YELLOW - ZATANNA; GREEN - KORY; CYAN - MEGAN; BLUE - RAQUEL; PURPLE - OPAL (OFC).

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When it goes "Where...have...you...been?", the song does it twice...the warm colors: magenta/Rosalie, red/Dahlia, orange/Leilani, and yellow/Violet will be the first one, and the cool colors: green/Cassia, cyan/Jasmine, blue/Willow, and purple/Heather.

It's a mix of these two choreography videos and it amazes me that people make videos like the two between this sentence inside their dance studios anytime...they're very talented.

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Once the music was over, the crowd cheers and went insane. The Spectrum bows and waves at the people before heading backstage. When the girls got there, they immediately head into the dressing rooms and went dead silent except for their hearts beating in their chests.

"Oh girls, come out wherever y'all are." The girls let Black Cat cast an invisibility spell and an enchantment that blocks the boys from finding them.

(Mind link established, where we're going now Bella?) Miss Martian asked the demigoddess.

(Two words, top floor.) Wonder Woman answered while trying to stay calm and quiet.

The girls snuck out of the dressing rooms and ran upstairs to the secret elevator. White Raven quickly presses it and uses her magic to close the door shut. Fire Goddess chose the top floor and the girls waited till the door opens to their destination.

Once it does, the women rushed out and hides in random places. They heard their men walking up the stairs and gulped nervously. The ladies know that Steel Scion, Hardware, and Changeling can easily search for them, but Black Cat made sure that her mana kept the guys from finding all of them.

"Ladies, you can't hide from us all night long, we will find all of you and drag y'all home if we have to." Nightwing said in a low voice that almost made the Lucky Girl squeak out loud.

White Raven suddenly saw a light switch and use that to turn off the lights. Zatanna silently gave her a thumbs-up and crawled next to the cambion. The nephilim could see the men's feet on the hard ground and grew anxiously afraid.

[I can't find them here,] the Amalgam Kid stated as he sat down on the bed next to Hardware and glares at the floor.

He gets off of it and lifts the bed up with the half-robot man to see nobody there. The boys set the bed down and Steel Scion grew frustrated. The Son of Steel suddenly heard a ball rolling and snaps his eyes to where it came from.

(Damn it, we're so dead.) Tigress said.

(Don't make another sound woman, we can't be caught by Dick and Wally.) Black Cat told her as she makes a magic portal and teleports both of them along with the rest of the girls through the dimensional vortex. (This portal will lead them trying to find us in the cave, but we'll be inside the bottom ground floor where we can get out of these damn outfits and back in the tower.)

Steel Scion saw the portal and it seems to be kept open. The boys ran through it and saw their own selves back in the cave. Their lovers were driving them nuts and it was working...for now.

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The girls got out of their outfits and into their lingerie for tonight. Black Cat teleported them back in the tower after putting those clothes away in their undercover mission closet and saw that the lights were now off. The eight women were cautious and a bit intimidated.

"Jack?/Conner?/Vic?/Nate?/Wally?/Richie?/Matt?/Gar?" The girls called their names out.

Wonder Woman felt familiar webbed hands on her waist and was pulled back against their fronts like the seven women younger than her. She gasps when those certain pair of lips latched onto her bare neck and begun marking it with love bites. The lights went back and the girls immediately huddled together in fear with nervous looks on their faces compared to the darkened expressions written on the men.

"Hey?/Hi?/Hello?/Hiya?" The girls stuttered with reddened faces at how their men marked their necks with hickeys and got them aroused in an once pitch black lounge.

"You women are in some trouble now, y'all knew how jealous and possessive we are to you. Just because y'all dressed yourselves up nice for us doesn't mean all of you are off the hook," the girls froze to see handcuffs and backed away from their lovers while shaking uncontrollably.

"But," Flash raised a hand with Aquaman and Sentinel II (Matt Ferris).

"Nope, y'all getting punished our way and we'll make sure you ladies won't be running next time." Hardware replied to their protests, earning wide-eyed looks and reddened faces from the females in front of them.

(Run,) all eight girls ran to the halls with the boys trailing them off their paths and were lifted over their shoulders by their romantic interest/special companion.

[This never gets old,] the watch wielder said as he takes Zatanna to their shared room in the tower.

[Indeed,] the Atlantean responded while taking his Amazonian wife to their room.

By the end of the night through morning time, the girls were flustered messes and still sore from the rough pounding they got from their lovers. They blushed madly whenever the guys come out without a shirt and gave them sly smirks, which made the ladies smile shyly in return. The moral of their weekend is that to never tease your lovers whenever they still got adrenaline pumping in them from missions and are frustrated from having no sex.

COMMENT DOWN BELOW AND FOLLOW.