#and then its this whole thing that i basically only text people

[twinkbasement]

always fun & cool when u realise how distant everyone in ur life is so theres like no one to hang out w like ever and u just sort of like maybe text ppl here n there n yk thats cool but other ppl uh.. do stuff w people or at least have long calls

[technoarcanist]

CALLING ALL DOLLS, DRONES, ROBOTS AND CODING ENTHUSIASTS

Are you a robot that loves to serve? Are you a doll maid who seeks guidance in your duties? Are you some form of drone or being with no free will, open to having your actions dictated by the will of your owner? Does the idea of your empty mind being programmed like a machine appeal to you?

Are you enticed by the notion of writing code for your robotic servants? Are you a witch looking to create more intricate control glyphs? Are you an owner seeking to create automated instructions for your drones? Do you love the idea of filling an empty mind with rules and instructions to reflect your will?

INTRODUCING DRONE RESTRAINT NOTATION!

WHAT IS IT?

Drone Restraint Notation, or DRN, is a pseudo programming language created by my good friend Errant Spark, a drone with a very creative <empty space>. I helped with some of the final tweaks for the 1.0 version, but this is almost entirely Its creation.

It is a programming language that is designed in such a way that anyone without a background in programming can execute the commands like a machine, doll, drone, or programmable entity of your choice. It is also simple enough that most people without a background in programming can pick it up fairly easily, and intuitively!

Once you understand the language, you can read and execute all kinds of dynamic instructions and instruction types, in a way that makes it easy to parse in a plain-text format.

HOW DOES IT WORK?

The main documentation document will provide far more detail to this question than I ever could, but effectively it goes like this:

There are a list of eight KEYWORDS, in block capitals, that show you the type of instruction you’re executing. Then, after the KEYWORD, the instruction’s details are shown. Commands are read and executed from top to bottom by the drone, and programs can be ‘inserted’ into the drone’s memory at will (Assuming prior consent, of course)!

These KEYWORDS all have different kinds of functionality. The most basic one just has you carrying out a task. One checks if a condition is true, one provides an ongoing task you have to prioritize and maintain, one lets you create loops, etc.

The language has been designed in such a way as to minimize the amount of actual memorisation a drone has to do, and only has to read what’s right in front of them, and memorize tasks they have to accomplish/maintain. Obviously, mileage may vary depending on the memory space of the doll.

WHY SHOULD I USE IT?

For fun, I suppose! If you are someone who loves the idea of being programmed like a machine, executing only the instructions given, then this provides that! If you are a programmer who wants to program your very own doll bot, then this is a great place to get started too!

You can keep things nice and simple with a headspace that accepts basic command inputs, or you can see how deep the rabbit hole goes and import whole libraries into your headspace to carry out a full day’s maid duties, or sexual duties, or more!

Have fun executing commands, writing new code, testing it on your dolls. Have some playful fun watching as your early code files cause unintended behaviors, ironing out kinks and bugs like a real programmer until you’ve got your bots performing all sorts of dynamic tasks- or insert purposeful bugs to make your robots twitch and halt~

As with all things, never execute an instruction that you cannot/would not consent to. This is meant to be fun, and is NOT meant to be a way to circumvent normal consensual kink play. Programmers who attempt to use DRN as a way to bully people into doing what they want (Unless you’re into that sort of thing, in which case go nuts) do NOT have my endorsement, or the endorsement of Errant Spark.

NOW GO OUT THERE, AND ENJOY YOUR PROGRAMMING <3

>> Posted by XCN-PSD/I-04135

[alexanderwales]

We were talking on my server the other day about a sort of "performance prose" piece, a way to have a work of fiction that takes place within the digital world. I'm a fan of epistolary novels, and this is an epistolary novel that would have a time component to it.

Basically, the idea is that you set up a discord server, make all the channels read-only, then have a "performance" where bots are talking to each other according to a script. (You could also do this via roleplay, but I think that would be worse.) All these bots are "reading their lines" in these channels, forming a coherent story that's told entirely through text messages, but also, importantly, through the timing of when messages are sent, through when the messages are edited, through mutes and bans and slow modes.

It would all be realtime, that's part of the gimmick. I think it would be best if it was actually on discord, mostly because I think that's a better gimmick than having a javascript thing on some separate dedicated website.

There are lots of options for how you'd do it. Time is one major consideration: an hourlong "performance" as the bots do their scripted actions is interesting, nice and tight, more like a movie than anything else, something you sit down for as a dedicated viewing "experience". But at the other extreme, it could be as long as a week (more than that is probably impractical). Since it's in real time, that means that people actually need to check in and keep up with it, and you can actually miss things, catching them only in the backlog.

In practical terms, I think you'd only want ~10 characters and another ~20 secondary characters, the "main chatters" and the people who come in for a few lines every now and then. This is just a format in which the writing would take place, you'd want to figure out what the plot is, what it's "about", if it's about more than just internet/online culture.

So it's a stage play, but it takes place within a chat client of some kind, and has its own rhythms, and because we're using bots and not humans, and because we're using a format that has verisimilitude, we can do cool things with it.

And you might be asking "well wait, you're writing a script, just write a chat log instead, that's a relatively normal thing to write and read" but I dunno, there's something that's magical about doing it "live", witnessing a quiet conversation in the middle of the night, seeing the whole server get embroiled in a flashpoint issue, watching these characters get revealed in ways large and small.

[astrasng]

touchstarved txt ౨ৎ

→ summary: every human being needs someones touch.

→ warning: mainly fluff, little cursing.

→ a/n: this is the first post of my valentines week special. so, happy valentines week to everyone ♡ make sure to treat yourself to something delicious and stay hydrated! ♡

here's the masterlist to the event ^^

enjoy!♡

──── ⋆˚࿔ soobin

soobin who doesn't remember the last time someone touched him like this. not because they had to, (because of fitting or anything relatable to his work) but because they wanted to out of love. the feeling of someone's love with a simple touch almost makes him cry out, melting into your touch the first time you hold him. his whole body going slack against yours as he lets himself relax in your arms. he furrows his eyebrows slightly when he feels you swiping your fingers through his hair, only saying a small please continue as he snuggles into your neck more feeling your warm soft touch. "no one ever held me like this before"

──── ⋆˚࿔ yeonjun

when he started his idol career, he didn't think he'd find true love. always focusing on his dreams, on his members and family. love wasn't the first thing on his mind, but when you came into the picture everything changed. he craved for your attention of every hour of the day,texting you constantly to know you are doing fine and happy. somewhere in his mind and heart, it calmed him to know you are safe. when his schedule let him, he spent every time of his with you, always having an arm around you or his hands caressing yours in his palm. yeonjun usually carefully chooses the people he lets in his personal space, and you are one of them. it was rare to see him act so boldly or affectionate in public, but whenever you feel his hands swiping the hair out of your face of fixing something on your dress always makes you blush uncontrollably. you often think he just put an arm around me and my knees are already giving out i'm so pathetic but in all truthness this is your boyfriend's little game. "i just wanted to see you crave my touch as bad as i do with yours."

──── ⋆˚࿔ beomgyu

he spends almost every free time of his hovering around you. not stalker like, but rather like a curious friend. because he is your friend, and it nearly kills him. he wants you to notice him, to give him a fucking chance, and when you do he basically disappears for days. showing up with a smile days after,saying that he was preparing for your first date and when you see what he has been doing you feel guilt building up on you for not dating him sooner. beomgyu craves your love and touch like its a drug, finding every excuse to touch you. either pulling out a chair for you and touch the base of your back slightly to secure you sit down safely, or teasingly pulling on your hair whenever he has the chance. if he's really down bad for you, he even pulls your hand into his lap and examines your lifeline. "this definately says I'll be in your life for forever"

──── ⋆˚࿔ taehyun

taehyun mostly looks forward to nights.he knows you are home waiting for him, already done with work and busying yourself until he's done at the company. his heart beats the closer he gets to his apartment, because he already knows what is going to go down. he practically feels your hug already, your arms wrapped around him to pull him further into your shared home. he loves cuddling with you on the couch or on your bed, his face smushed against your chest to slowly lulling him into a deep sleep. his heart gives up mid-day when he suddenly remembers how you feel in his arms, wanting nothing more but to go home sooner and be with you. it's like his body psysically craves for you, melting into you the minute his body hits the bed yet again after a long day. there are nights when you have to wait for him so long that you eventually fall asleep, but taehyun always wraps his arms around you to feel like he's home again. "I'm home baby" he then murmurs like you can hear him in your sleep.

──── ⋆˚࿔ hueningkai

kai,someone who always puts his focus on his work suddenly gets annoyed when his balance is wavered. to the point he can't even go to practice without thinking of you, your face suddenly appearing in his mind in the middle of rehearsals. touchstarved kai, who thinks he can get you out of his mind if he works out enough, but this isn't the case. because the minute he sees you again he has to have your hands on him, missing your touch and the way you melt into his body when hugging him. he's just so madly in love. "i needed to remember how your hug feels like" says in a whisper as you basically feel him crush your bones.

important!: this is pure fiction, the act in this story is by my imagination and not based off true events. please do not copy the work.

[hauntedsavefile]

my take on the strangetown premades!

base temp by @/mageofpanic

this took a lot longer than expected + some of these guys look a little more rough than desired but I'm pretty happy anyways!

keep in mind that these are *my* interpretations of the characters that i've curated over the many years ive been fixated on this game :,-)

some design notes below the cut since i put an ungodly amount of effort into the thought procress (its a lot of text, warning you now) ⬇️

- following the ts3 + ts2 genetics, my curious-smith family are darker skinned with less racially ambiguous features, fuller lips, larger noses, etc. (although not every person of that ethnicity is the same of course! these were purely observational looking at their family line). they are afro mestizo in my headcanon, with glarn being afro latino & kitty being mestizo.

- vidcund still has his mullet thing going on but it is a loc mullet!

- my curiouses are generally chubby. i don't have any exact reason for this. i know a lot of people headcanon pascal as being chubby but i think it could be cool if they all were. it also adds visual interest with different body types.

- erin & loki are scandinavian (like me!) so they're already very pale but i wanted to excaberbate that even further by making them albino. this isn't an accurate depiction of albinism as in real life, people with that condition often have health issues alongside that. (if i were to give that any thought, i like to think that loki initially became interested in inventing to benefit his own health issues but then his ambition took him down a darker, more mad sciencetist path). for erin as well, i just think it's cute considering her whole psychic thing, lookin a bit fairy-like + contrasts nicely with her pink colour scheme.

- nervous is darker skinned, exactly the same as his ma since grim doesn't have dna really. (some people have their own school of thought regarding why nerv being super pale, but this is my own). he has burn scars as electrocution causes scarring on skin + organ tissue, which he has gone through, a lot. he has various stitches, scars, and vitiligo marks across his face and body. the vitiligo on his face looks like a skull. this was originally going to be on the left side of his face, where theres no burns, but i figured it made symbolic sense + was a lot less cluttered if the burns covered up the skull vitiligo markings on his face.

- johnny, ripp, tank all have acne / acne scars - typical of teenagers.

- chloe + lola are of different skintones for storytelling purposes. in my little world, chloe and lola are very deeply close but also very affected by the abscence of their dad (him abandoning them), and being the only aliens they really knew of - basically being raised in isolation for most of their life. This is your typical cain & abel tale. Lola always felt inferior compared to Chloe, who had personality and charisma. She was always jealous of that, feeling like she’s always the awkward one + always will be in her sister’s shadow because of this. She tries her best to compensate for this through pouring herself into her work, in hopes that when she gets money, she’ll finally be accepted. This extends into their assimilation to humanness as well. Chloe is able to assimilate better whereas Lola feels like she cannot.

- Ripp is very different to canon.. I don't have a lot of an explanation for this but I just wanted to give him scene hair (also longer hair because I headcanon her as being a trans girl, but a very closeted one so she's in that awkward phase of growing out her hair but pretending like it's just shaggy + pulls it back into a low ponytail). The cleft lip is a bit of projection on my part, as I had a cleft palate when I was younger. Characters that I like will recieve some kind of disability that I have, for Nervous it's deafness + debilitating leg pain, for Ripp its this. I think it's also interesting narrative wise to compare how Buzz & the Beakers both handle disability. Buzz is a very 'tough it out' & 'you're just being sensitive' type whereas the Beakers uhh caused it, with their experimentation.

- I'm gonna be real, I hate Jill's design. It tells me nothing about her personality wise + I'm bummed out how human she looks. We need more weird little girl designs! Tried to find a middle ground.

- Buck has brown eyes like the corrupted version of Lyla. I chose to make him look like a carbon copy of Lyla (relatively speaking) for irony purposes. He has the least memories of her and yet looks exactly like her.

- Kristen is intended to look more like a typical masc lesbian because I am soo indulgent towards making the singles household just like a crazy lesbian situationship household (minus the curious sisters with eachother - of course).

[omorithedreamermod]

FEBRUARY DEVLOG - 2

Though it'd be fun to showcase a little bit of my portrait process, even if it's not specific! Anyways, it's time for the fourth DEVLOG...and...

IMPORTANT INFORMATION:

I got sick. I am still sick. This unfortunately has thrown a wrench in my productivity despite my best efforts. March release will still be possible, it just probably won't be as early as I was originally hoping, sadly. I hope I'll be back to full productivity soon. On the bright side, basically all contributions made by others are complete, so everything left to do is just on me. The list is a lot but I chose to do 85% of the mod, so it is on me to see it through!

That's why, rather than listing progress this week, I'll just list everything that still needs to be done.

THINGS LEFT TO DO:

General writing is complete, I just need to do some more flavor text and a bunch of NPC dialogue to certain locations that got completed later on.

There's a couple bits of sprite art, but barely any. Most of that is completely done.

There is only one more map to be made. A super small one! :D

Three music tracks are still pending. The full OST for the PRELUDE (including the 8 from the DEMO) is 48 tracks! I named them all recently it was very fun. Everyone worked hard!

Cutscene writing is complete up until a certain point. There's only one more section that needs writing. But, a lot of cutscenes still need to be programmed, so I really hope I can get better soon so I can do all of that. There's also other general programming to be done that I need to get around to.

BASIL real world portraits are done. SUNNY's are not. He doesn't need as many as BASIL, though.

I still have a couple NPCS to hand draw. Nothing fancy, though.

Badges all need to be made and then implemented. Wish me luck, there's quite a few!

After that, the playtest will be able to be sent off to people to bugtest while I then continue onto:

Drawing three whole cutscenes. Two on the longer side, one shorter.

(If time allows) A still image of DREAMER holding a thing! (Its a secret)

A certain separate thing needs to be completely written, then have a bunch of things drawn for it.

Credits video!!! Very important!!!!!

After everything above is implemented, I need to draw the additional art for the trailer...

CONCLUSION:

Hoping I can get back on track soon. I'm still sick and I'm frustrated about that. I'm really hoping I get better soon, as it's really set me behind on my intended schedule. Still, the goal is for full PRELUDE release in March, and I believe it's completely possible as long as I recover sooner than later. I know it might seem like a lot, but I did the DEMO all on my own. Trust me! March release is the plan! And the help I did get with sprite art (so many npcs!!!), OST(so many tracks...), some maps, and being able to ask people questions about programming when I'm lost has been absolutely wonderful. I wouldn't have been able to do everything on my own this quickly.

Though, I do hope after PRELUDE and I revamp the signups, I'll get even more help, because the plans for the future are quite hefty haha. I'll scale back if I need to, of course. Either way, I'm really excited, even if I am anxious and want it out ASAP. I'm so excited for everyone to see what THE DREAMER is truly going to be like!

[pazziescapism]

Break Our Ice - Chapter 2

pairing: paige x azzi

wc: 4.2k

tw: light sexual content, alcohol

au fic what??, figureskater!Azzi x icehockeyplayer!Paige

fake dating, just like playful banter teasing relationship to lovers, basically paige and azzi dancing around each other

a/n: okayy let go, we're back. firstly thank you for all the interest in this fic, i was afraid it'd be a little boring. i may not be able to update everyday but i promise to aim for at least a chapter a week. as always, let me know what u think and feel free to send me reactions. also, i wanna preface this and say i have never written anything remotely sexual for wlw so if its kinda choppy...hopefully that'll just improve with time which is why i kinda skimmed it over. anyway happy reading!!

“What the fuck” Paige says that following weekend, starting at Azzi’s belly piercing, as she climbs into her car. “You understand we’re going outside, right? Like where other people are?

Azzi looks down at her outfit, frowning slightly “Yes? What’s wrong?”

Paige doesn’t move, even though she had been the one texting Azzi to hurry up. Azzi looks down again, trying to see where the issue was. She’s wearing a dark grey skintight long sleeve that cuts right above her midriff paired with some grey sweatpants.

“I thought it was cute,” she says, “like casual and comfortable or something.”

Paige makes a strangled noise in the back of her throat, Azzi was right, it was – it was also a myriad of other things she could think of like hot, sexy, beautiful, gorgeous - and that was exactly the problem. “No, yea it is, I guess I’ve never seen you not in athleisure wear before.”

‘So, I don’t need to go back in and change?” Azzi asks.

Paige looks physically pained by the suggestion. “No, definitely not.”

“Okay, so can you tell me what we’re doing now?” Azzi asks, as Paige starts her car.

“Yeah,” Paige says. Her hand comes around the passenger seat as she looks behind her and reverses, her arm stretching behind Azzi. Whatever she says next flies right over Azzi’s head and is lost entirely as she watches the subtle flex of Paige’s biceps, pale skin bulging just slightly. Azzi’s mouth feels dry.

“-and it just feels like it’s not going well,” she hears Paige say once the arm is removed and she tunes back in sharply.

“What?”

Paige sends her a questioning look that Azzi’s gotten used to the last few days. “This whole thing- we just are really not good at it”

“Oh” Azzi says, and lets her head fall back against the seat. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

Jayden, who’s stopped by twice over the last three days, is clearly suspecting Azzi of lying. The only thing keeping him from accusing Azzi outright is probably some sick twisted urge to catch her in the act, vindicating himself forever in the process. Azzi isn’t sure how many more questions she can nervously stammer out fake answers to until she ends up contradicting herself in a truly catastrophic way.

The situation was so terrible that Sarah had turned to Azzi before leaving the locker room yesterday and said, as casually as she were asking about the weather, “Are you and Paige pretending to date?”

Azzi had spluttered; the water she had been drinking threatening to drip down her chin “We- I can’t-”

Sarah had only looked at her, like Azzi was a partially strangled insect she held trapped in a jam jar. “You aren’t very good at it” she had added, killing any sort of response of Azzi’s denial.

“We’re practicing” Azzi had said in response even though her pride stung a little to be caught on by a seemingly new freshman.

“You both seem a little uncomfortable.”

Azzi hadn’t even known what to say to that and had eventually mustered up a defensive, “We’re still working on it”

“The pretend relationship” Sarah had said, as though confirming.

“Yes.”

“Ah well,” She had said, vague and incomprehensible as usual. “No one laps before learning to swim.”

The strange exchange had been weighing on Azzi’s mind for hours afterward.

The problem is that Paige is a really, truly, exceptionally bad liar. And Azzi, who is meant to cover for that, hasn’t been in a serious relationship since the age of fifteen. To her slight embarrassment, she’s forgotten what dating someone even looks like, much less how she should act in a relationship. Much less how to act when she’s pretending to be in a relationship to someone she’s actually incredibly attracted to. The whole thing is beginning to seem like self-inflicted torture, a slow bleeding-to-death kind of torture.

“it’s fine,” she says, like she’s said the last three days, “we’ll get it eventually.”

“I think I have a solution.” Paige says, making a right turn that would have sent Azzi careening through the side of the car, if not for her seatbelt. “Oops, sorry, anyway I think we just have to get to know each other better.”

“Know each other better” Azzi repeats dubiously.

“Yes, exactly” Paige says. She parks with a screeching of tires and turns to Azzi with the battle-ready focus of a military general. “I’m going to pick up a pizza. You go into that liquor store and get something for us to drink. We are gonna get drink and figure this out tonight.”

“Ah wait-” Azzi says, but Paige is already heading into the pizza place.

Azzi sighs and walks into the liquor store. Twenty minutes later she walks out to a baffled Paige that she needs to come inside with Azzi and vouch for her age so that the man behind the counter doesn’t confiscate her ID.

Then she patiently waits for Paige to stop laughing.

By the time they get the pizza and their drinks back to Paige’s apartment, its six in the evening and the sun has set.

“I’ve never seen your apartment before,” Azzi muses, standing at the entrance as Paige unlocks her door. “But your building is nicer than mine.”

The apartment is nicer than Azzi’s too. Bigger for starters, with huge windows in the seating and dining areas that make it seem more spacious than it is. The space is setup to entertain, enough chairs to seat any number or people, complete with matching soft plush cushions.

“It’s weird seeing you this quiet” Azzi says, watching Paige lock the door behind them. “Are you getting nervous or something?” Azzi giggles staring at the giant television hung on the living room wall.

Paige playfully shoves Azzi's back, pushing her forward. “Trust me, I’m not. I just haven’t had anyone here in a while...”

Paige brushes off Azzi’s questioning glance as she sets up the pizza and glasses, pouring their drinks and taking a seat on her expensive looking carpet, leaning against the couch as she eats.

Once they’re several drinks in, the empty pizza box lying between them, Paige gets up and comes back with a sheet of paper. Azzi can make out her handwriting going all the way down the page.

“Is that a list?” Azzi asks, taken aback. “Are those all questions? Did you write me a list?”

“We’ll start easy” Paige says, a little flushed.

“Hang on, this can’t be an interrogation” Azzi interjects as she plucks the piece of paper from Paige’s hand.

“Favourite colour?” Azzi asks.

“Purple.” Paige nods in response.

“Okay favourite animal?” Azzi follows up.

Paige winces “I don’t know?” 

“What do you mean you don’t know your own favourite animal?” Azzi asks, exasperated. “it’s just which one you like best, which one do you like best?”

“Can we do the next question or something”

“No,” Azzi says firmly. “What’s your favourite animal?”

“I don’t know!” Paige protests. “I never think about it. What’s yours?”

“Dogs” Azzi says immediately, and Paige nods.

“That’s a good one. Okay, that my favourite too.”

Azzi stares at her, and Paige stares back gleefully. That jawline is ever as sharp, and her blue eyes are looking directly into Azzi’s. Life is worth living after all.

“Fine,” Azzi snaps, petulant. “What’s your favourite ice cream flavour?”

Paige smiles innocuously. “I don’t know, what’s yours?”

Theres a moment of silence, Paige smiling, chin tilted down, looking up at Azzi innocently and Azzi’s squinting stare is fixed on her. Then Azzi pulls a cushion off her couch and throws it at her, and Paige bats it away breaking into laughter.

“Paige” Azzi complains, but she’s laughing too. “You can’t just steal all my favourites! Are you twelve?”

“Don’t ask me such stupid questions then!” Paige says, still laughing.

“You were the one who wrote these questions to begin with” Azzi says falling back into the couch as she buried her face in the cushions. 

Paige stands up to look down at Azzi still flopped into the couch her hair slightly messier than normal.

“What? Azzi says, adorably confused with her one incredibly adorable dimple peeking out.

“God” Paige says, mournfully. “You’re kind of a loser, huh?”

Azzi shoots up pulling Paige to fall on the couch with her, shoving a pillow over her face.

They abandon the questions after that and start a movie instead. Azzi complaining about Paige’s poor hospitality until Paige caves and pours them both new glasses. The movie starts to play, both of them siting appropriately on two separate couch cushions as some men in suits start fighting on the screen. Ten minutes through the movie, Paige’s glass is empty and she’s starting to migrate closer to Azzi. Squirming until Azzi is squished into the narrow spot between Paige and the arch of the couch, Azzi’s legs swinging over Paige’s lap, Paige’s arm coming up to encircle her.

This is Azzi’s favourite, she decides instantly, when Paige is all around her, and all Azzi can smell in any direction is her Valentino cologne, and they’re pressed up so close together that Azzi can feel her chest rise and fall with each breath. She’d forgotten, at some point, what it was like to be so close to another person, so that her space became their space, their breathing evening out into the same rhythm. 

“Paigey” she says, not looking up from where a man in a suit is now yelling something on the television. “I can’t lie, you’ve really broken through all the walls I know I normally have up, its honestly a little scary…so we’re friends now”

Azzi continues to keep her focus on the screen although whatever that’s playing is truly the last thing she’s thinking about right now as she can feel the heat of Paige’s stare on the side of her face. Azzi doesn’t look at her, so Paige resorts to having the hand on Azzi hip squeeze a little. Suddenly, Azzi is glad for the darkness, so that Paige can’t see how her face flushes at the fondness of her gesture. She leans her head on Paige’s shoulder. She thinks about kissing her. Azzi is once again suddenly very aware that she could be kissing her right now, could be pressing her tonged against that chiselled jaw and those pink lips, yet she isn’t.

She’s honestly still considering it when Paige kisses her.

It’s exactly the kind of kiss Azzi would have expected, except its better because its real, because its flesh and blood moving underneath her, warm hands holding her jaw gently in place.

“What” Azzi says, pulling away slightly, her breath coming heavier than it should be, “are we doing?”

Paige smiles at her, a little crooked, her face a little red. “I thought that part was clear, honestly.”

Azzi is fairly sure she should move away. Its only that she can’t really remember why in the moment.

Azzi is really terrible at denying herself she realises a little later.

“It’s fine” she says, panting slightly. “We are just two adults. Two adults pretending to date. If anything, it’s just convenient” 

“Right” Paige agrees, though she doesn’t seem to be paying much attention, her hands slipping down Azzi’s back to squeeze at her ass, fingers tightening in a grip that is almost bruising, making Azzi gasp. “Can I take your shirt off?”

Azzi shifts where she’s kneeling over Paige’s lap and leans back away from the hot mouth on her throat.

“You first” she says, pushing up ineffectually at the grey hoodie Paige’s wearing. She only succeeds in wrinkling it, until Paige makes an impatient noise and pulls it off herself, exposing a long stretch of lean but muscled skin. Azzi groans overwhelmed and thrilled all at once. Paige’s already got both hands up Azzi’s shirt tracing over her ribcage, the feeling making Azzi shudder.

The urgency doesn’t disappear, not when Azzi pushes away to breathe, not when Paige gasps a shaky exhalation into the curve of Azzi’s neck as she rolls their hips together. Not when she Paige lays Azzi down on the cough looking up at her through her thick eyelashes with her eyes dark, and hair messy, making Azzi whimper uselessly into her hand and Paige pushes a finger into her.

Afterwards, with sweat cooling, tacky on both their skins, Azzi reaches down off the couch and grabs the sheet of paper Paige had brought in, now lying discarded on the floor.

“Did you handwrite all of these” She asks, amazed, pushing Paige’s face away with a hand and she tries to take the paper back. “Stop that I’m reading this.”

The questions range from general- her favourite colour, music artists- to Azzi-centric; questions about the routines she likes to perform, how she met Caroline and Kaitlyn, where she practices when not on the rink. Azzi’s jaw goes progressively slacker as she looks through the list, floored by how much attention Paige has been paying to her, how much interest she’s taken in in her, somehow keeping her unaware of it.

“Careful, or I might start to think you like me after all, p” Azzi says lightly, hoping it distracts from the obvious affection she’s sure must be inscribed all over her face.

“You asked me for help” Paige says, apparently giving up on trying to grab the sheet back. “I wasn’t going to half-ass it.” Azzi shifts to look at her and nearly falls off the narrow couch space they’ve squeezed themselves into, far too small for two athletes. Paige’s arms come up fast, pulling her back up, shift so Azzi is halfway on top of her, their legs tangled together.

“Do you ever half-ass anything?” Azzi asks breathlessly.

“I’m a whole ass kinda person,” Paige tells her, and her hand strays lower from where its resting on Azzi’s back, as if to prove her point.

Azzi ignores this, as well as she can with the heat flooding her face. “Since you made the list, it’d be a shame to waste it,” she says, and passes Paige back the paper. “You can ask three, and then it’s my turn. Make them count.”

Paige doesn’t seem inclined to play along, lethargic from sex, her eyelids drooping over her eyes. “I though you said they were stupid questions” she says, “what happens if I don’t answer?”

“I’ll kill you” Azzi says, then amends. “For every three you answer, I’ll give you a kiss.”

Paige’s eyes snap back open. “Is that a reward or a punishment?” She grumbles, but she’s already holding the paper up, scanning the list for questions.

Two questions later, Paige has learned that Azzi’s favourite move to incorporate into her routines in a Bielmann spin – lifting one leg over her head- and that she has two younger brothers.

Paige clears her throat, not looking up from the list “Last one- why’s that Jayden guy so obsessed with you?”

Azzi furrows her brows. She didn’t remember seeing that one on the list. “Not sure,” she answers anyway. “Jayden used to live somewhere in Europe. I only met him about a year ago, when he came to help out with the business and rink.”

“Did you not get along?” Paige asks, Azzi shakes her head.

“Actually, I though he resented me at first, for taking so much of his dad’s attention because he’d never talk to me. He only got weird later.”

“So you didn’t date or anything?” it’s a casual question, thrown out as a follow-up but there’s something sharply honest in Paige’s voice that makes Azzi look up at her.

“That’s been two extra questions” she points out. “But no.”

Paige smiles, a little sheepish, and lets the paper drift off the couch and onto the floor, calloused hands cupping Azzi’s cheeks.

“Here,” she says, her hands moving to the side of Azzi’s face. “I’ll make it up to you”

Their first kiss (and a few following that) had been harsh, frantic. Teeth digging into lips, hard nails digging into flesh, desperate kisses followed by fumbling fingers.

This kiss is softer, sweeter. A hello, I’m home kiss and a goodbye, ill miss you kiss and a baby, you made it kiss. Azzi presses a little closer, small sounds leaving her lips, trapped between their mouths. Paige kisses her like she’s trying to memorize her, mapping out the spots that makes her melt, until half-formed whimpers are pushing their way out of Azzi’s mouth, tingling heat tracing its way up her spine.

Azzi pulls away with a wet sound that’s almost embarrassing. Paige’s lips are kiss-red, slick with spit and slightly swollen.

“If you keep doing that” Azzi says, her voice raw, “We’ll never get though that list.”

She must look similar because Paige’s eyes are heated as she scans Azzi’s face. “We’ll have time,” she murmurs, and pulls Azzi in again.

Azzi is in the midst of trying to get her key in the lock of her apartment, the only light to see by two small lamps on either side of the door. She keeps missing the lock, her hands a little shaky, scratching up the sides of the metal, creating loud noises every time she messes up.

“Well, well, well,” Caroline’s voice says from behind her, “look what we have here.”

“Don’t listen to her” Kaitlyn says when Azzi turns around. The two of them are standing in the doorway of Kaitlyn’s apartment, right across from Azzi’s, “Do your walk of shame with pride.”

“Caroline why couldn’t Kaitlyn live in your apartment complex.” Azzi says, more to the area at large than either of her friends. “Do I deserve this?”

“What has innocent Azzi been up to, coming back a little dishevelled?” Kaitlyn coos, ignoring her.

“It’s late you know” Caroline adds, faux disapproval lining her voice “you have practice tomorrow.

“Are you my parents?” Azzi asks snidely. “One of you come get my door open for me”

Kaitlyn steps forward and takes the key from her, unlocking the door, then entering Azzi’s apartment before she herself could even get in.

“Go on,” Kaitlyn says, taking a sea on her carpet, uninvited. Caroline sits next to her, both of them peering up at Azzi. She feels a bit like a kindergarten teacher. “Tell us about your date.”

Azzi makes indistinct grumbling noises and flops down beside them, cross-legged on the floor. Her socks are two different shades of black, she thinks, staring down at her feet.

“She’s stressed about her crush,” Kaitlyn whispers conspiratorially to Caroline.

“I don’t have a crush on her,” Azzi says, wincing. “That makes it sound so middle school.”

“Oh, sorry,” Caroline says, not sounding very sorry at all. “What would you call it? A lust-induced apoplexy?” 

Azzi stares very firmly at the carpet. Nice long wiry fibres in her carpet. “I don’t know. I think she’s hot, yeah. I like to make her a little angry but that’s just attraction (and maybe for attention), you know? I have eyes, so obviously I’m attracted to her.” 

Her voice trails off. Paige’s carpet was plush. You couldn’t see each individual rug fibre in it, like you could with Azzi’s. It probably cost a lot more.

“She’s a good listener too,” Azzi continues, “Better than you’d expect. I mean, you’d think she was a total musclehead, but she’s really smart. And she remembers things I say, like even small things. I like talking to her. I don’t know what you would call that.”

 She finally looks up from the floor, hoping to see some understanding, maybe some compassion in her friends’ eyes-

As Kaitlyn and Caroline struggle to contain their laughter, “You guys are the worst friends known to man” Azzi complains.

Caroline does not look particularly offended by this. “Sorry. We get caught up in the moment.”

Azzi stares. “‘The moment’ being the moment that my life choices start falling apart before my eyes?”

“Your life is always falling apart,” Kaitlyn says soothingly. “If I waited to have sex until you were free from crisis, I would still be a virgin.”

Azzi stares harder. Caroline pats her head, ruffling her hair. “There, there. Do you want a hug?”

“No,” Azzi says, pushing her hand off. 

“So, was the date good?” Caroline asks, raising her eyebrows. “Are the fake girlfriends now real girlfriends?”

“No!” Azzi says. “It was, you know, it was casual sex.”

Silence rings in Azzi’s living room.

“Uh-oh,” Kaitlyn says, muffled from behind Caroline’s hand. 

“You’re terrible at casual sex,” Caroline says, dropping her hand away. “Azzi, you are seriously bad at casual sex.”

“Azzi,” Kaitlyn says, horrifically sympathetic. “The two times you have tried to have casual sex have gone terribly. Please tell me you aren’t trying this again.”

“Tell a girl you want to die in her arms one time, and you get branded as bad at casual sex for life,” Azzi says. 

“It was two times,” Kaitlyn corrects, which is unhelpful. 

Azzi tips her neck backwards, stares at the patterns on her ugly ceiling. It had actually been three times, but she’s not going to volunteer that information. 

She had taken a cab home, alone, despite Paige’s slightly tipsy attempts to come with her. She had kissed her goodbye at the door, breathless and giggling, peppered small kisses across her face the way she had wanted to earlier, and then gotten in a cab and come home alone, pink with the rush of it.

“Third time’s the charm?” She tries instead. It doesn’t seem to be a comfort to anyone, much less herself. 

“It’s fine,” she says into the quiet. “Seriously. I’m not jumping into anything.”

Unbidden, an image of Paige’s face- smiling up at her, emotive and all, her hair splayed out against the carpet- flashes into her brain.

“You’re thinking something stupid,” Kaitlyn says, squinting at her. “I can see it in your eyes.”

“Don’t you have a house you need to go back to?” Azzi answers, tetchy.

Azzi’s sitting on a bench pulling her skates off of sore feet when Paige finally approaches her the next day, worn out after a long practice. Her fingers are trembling the lacing remaining stubbornly tight despite her efforts.

Its only when Paige steps in front of her and kneels to the ground taking Azzi’s ankle in one hand loosening the ties with the other that Azzi even notices her presence.

“How long have you been here?” she manages to ask her head feeling tight and too full, stuffed with cotton.

“A while” Paige says and adjusts her grip to pull the first skate off. “You’re really good.”

Azzi smiles, “I know.”

Paige finally looks up at her, blue eyes locking into her with a sort of amused irritation. “Of course you do.”

“Hey,” Azzi says, as Paige stands back up, passing her her skates. Paige looks down at her, and Azzi feels that awful shyness again, making her want to duck her head, hide behind her hair. She resolutely maintains eye contact. “About, I mean, you know. We can, um, keep it casual. The whole thing, I mean, we can just have it be, you know, part of the, um, situation.”

She’s babbling, unsure of what she’s saying or what she’s meaning to say, too afraid to break eye contact, as though Paige will disappear forever once she does. 

Paige smiles at her. “Do you want to add sex to your little rules list?”

“It’s not a rule,” Azzi says indignantly, the nervousness slipping easily away from her body. “It’s just, you know- if you want to.”

“Trust me,” Paige says, endearingly quickly. “I want to.” 

Azzi takes a second to process that, struck by the easy honesty, and then buries her head in her hands.

“Hey,” Paige says, nudging Azzi’s head with her hand. “You good?”

“You’re adorable,” Azzi says, lifting her face back up, slightly more heated than she would prefer. “I can’t stand you.”

She had meant to create some distance between the two of them today, a pre-emptive measure before the fluttering feeling in her chest became too big for Azzi to handle. Except, Azzi was beginning to realize that she missed Paige when she wasn’t around.

She had created a space for herself in Azzi’s life, so easily and quickly, filling an emptiness she hadn’t even realized was there. 

She’s still looking at Paige when a familiar figure brushes into her periphery. Jayden’s still got that terrible coat on, long and sweeping his ankles, heading towards Azzi like he’s got an agenda. One that involves asking Azzi multiple jagged little questions, that Azzi will inevitably have no answer for.

“Fuck,” Azzi murmurs, and grabs Paige’s elbow to yank her in front of her, a last-ditch attempt to hide herself. “Jayden’s here, pretend we’re, I don’t know-”

She cuts herself off when Paige sits down on the bench beside her, her back to the door, her face hovering next to Azzi’s, her hand covering the curve of Azzi’s jaw. 

The kiss is quick, a fleeting touch of lips that leaves Azzi wanting more, her eyelashes fluttering shut and then back open to where Paige is still so close to her. 

“Is he still watching?” Paige murmurs, lips against Azzi’s skin. An unpleasantness twists under Azzi’s skin, an unwelcome reminder that they’re only putting on a show.

Her eyes dart over Paige’s shoulder, to the entrance of the rink. It’s empty.

“Yes,” she lies, and pulls Paige’s face back towards her.

[rapz-rites]

They All Know Now

That Batfam finds out Damian has a gf, but not from Damian

A/N: just randomly had this idea. Mostly a group chat between the Batfam reacting the finding out Damian has a boo thang

Enjoy 😊

Word Count: 850+

Warning: Cursing, Dick being a drama queen, Tim doubting Damian’s rizz

Damian hadn’t expected for people to find out, especially not like this

Why can’t people just mind their own business 

This whole thing was stupid

You and Damian went out to this small fair just outside of Gotham for a date

You thought it would be unnecessary to wear disguises

You wanted a normal date without disguises and paparazzi

But you were wrong

You guys were having a nice time, walking and holding hands, sharing some cotton candy 

Unfortunately, someone from Gotham Academy was there too

They took a picture and somehow media outlets got it

It was going viral

The headlines ranged from “Damian Wanye Mystery Girl” to “Who is this girl? Lover or Gold Digger”

A few months ago, you and Damian got matching promise ring

One news outlet mistook them for wedding rings

“Nothing like his billionaire father, Damian Wayne is locked in”

When you showed Damian the headlines

You found them hilarious 

Damian didn’t

Not even 10 minutes after you showed him the first headline the ‘BatChat’ group chat

Made by none other than Dick Grayson

BATCHAT 🦇

GRAYSON: Attachment: 5 images 2 videos

                   WHAT IS THIS?

                   DAMIAANNNNN!!!!!

DAMIAN : What do you want?

                 I’m busy.

CASS : Are you with Y/N?

DAMIAN : Yes.

GRAYSON : Is that why you’ve been disappearing lately??

TODD : Wow….

            The demon spawn got a girlfriend

            I thought Raven was going to be the one and only

DRAKE : Wait…

  Damian really has a girlfriend???

DUKE : Haven’t you been keeping up

DRAKE : No really…

I’m busy ok

STEPH : Are we going to ignore the fact that Cass knew and didn’t tell us

GRAYSON : Yea Cass

                    Why didn’t you tell us???

CASS : Not my secret to tell

DAMIAN : That's why she was allowed to know

CASS : Bruce knew too

GRAYSON : I feel betrayed

                    Why didn’t you tell me?

                   🥲.

DUKE : I wonder why

            🙄.

GRAYSON : Don't sass me rn Duke

DAMIAN : Cass, Y/N wants to know if you’re going on patrol on Friday.

TODD : SHE KNOWS?!!?!?!

            Does Bruce know she knows?

GRAYSON : OF COURSE HE KNOWS

                 Its Bruce

CASS : I’m not.

            Why?

DAMIAN : She says “we need to finish the movie from our sleepover”

STEPH : YOU TWO HAD A SLEEPOVER WITHOUT ME

DUKE : What was the movie?

TODD : Really Duke?

           That’s what you want to know

DUKE : Yes… leave me alone

DAMIAN : I don’t know.

DUKE : Can you ask please 🙏🏾 

DAMIAN : She said they finished Salt, with Angelina Jolie and are now on Mr and Mrs Smith

CASS : Ask her if we’re going to watch Megan Fox movies after.

DUKE : Angelina Jolie…

        Megan fox…

        Can I PLEASE join 🙏🏾 🙏🏾 🙏🏾 

DAMIAN : I’m not a walkie-talkie.

           Text her yourself.

DUKE : Fine

         I don’t have her number

CASS : …

DAMIAN : I was talking to Cass

STEPH : Uhm….

              What about me?!?!?!

GRAYSON: Steph plz

                   Damian has been ignoring me this entire time

                  😢.

                  Can we meet her????

DAMIAN : No.

CASS: Y/N says she would love to meet you but only if “Dami” is comfortable with it

GRAYSON : SHE GETS TO GIVE YOU A NICKNAME BUT NOT ME

                     Everytime I try to give you one you reject it

DRAKE : Dami?

               Who’s Dami

TODD : Damian

             Duhhh

DRAKE : I'm running of 2 hours of sleep and 8 cups of coffee

              🖕🏾.

TODD : 😂

Suddenly everyone got an incoming call

--Incoming Facetime Call: Damian--

Once everyone joined the group facetime they all noticed a girl sitting next to Damian

They couldn’t lie

You were gorgeous 

You looked like the girl that wasn’t overly popular but everyone liked

Basically a Disney princess

But you didn’t look like Damian’s usual type

Raven or his past fling, Flatline

You were probably the reason he slowly started incorporating color in his wardrobe 

I mean it was just dark colors but it was colors nonetheless

You finally spoke up and the conversation rolled on from there

Y/N : Hi everyone! I’m Y/N! 

         It's so nice to meet the rest of you.

Grayson : Hi! Im Dick. Damian’s handsome oldest brother.

TODD : I’m Jason Todd. The cooler, even more handsome big bro.

DRAKE : Uh hi. Tim.

Everyone else started to introduce themselves 

DAMIAN: Hurry up and ask what you need, we’re extremely busy. 

Y/N : Damian, be nice. Feel free to ask me anything

After a brief moment of silence they all started talking at one

“See what I mean” Damian whispered in your ear 

You rolled your eyes at him and spoke up

Y/N : One question at a time please

DRAKE : Is Damian paying you to act like his girlfriend? Did he have to bribe you?

For the next hour, you were answering questions and they were getting to know you

They like how you balanced Damian out

You chilled him out

Normally Damian would have been tearing their heads off, but you were calmed him before he could even react

They like seeing Damian happy

He was calmer at home

Even smiling

Actually it was a small lip smirk but they counted it

Damian was happy

Especially with you

They could tell by the way he would look at you when you talked

With so much love

I had this for a while but I finally posted it. When I pasted it from my google docs I was shocked cuz all the colors and formatting was basically gone and I had to redo them. Sadly they didn’t have the colors i wanted so Cass Duke and Tim are normal but I might give Tim orange or something 🤷🏾‍♀️

[wonjuii]

Hi, I do think exposing is childish but... I want to warn people. Ever since, like around 2024, august? I was invited to a groupchat, filled with people who posts on tumblr! some were ppl i didnt know about. And.. there is marie. I thought marie was a sweet person at first, didnt talk to her since i didnt know her that much. ever since the month grew, there's a chaos drama about dodo. (i am not bringing it up that much but it will be some information direct to that chaos)

it was around... october? I dont know but lets forget that! past 3 days, marie was being too dramatic, calling me and @awwriri sensitive. (just to tell you that, I can reclaim the slurs since i took an irl test but idk if its a thing since the doctor said "it was to check if i have autism" but it was positive i guess!) It was during the lil-liaa chaos. I didnt want to say the r slur to her but i ended up saying it since there were alot of things happening. As you can tell, i asked permission to say the slur, I was worried if i am really meant to say the slur in the gc. (please anyone dont get uncomfortable!) all of the sudden, she called me insensitive..? I didn't know asking permission is considered impolite or insensitve.. we all had a small talk with marie. everything went a little okay (I assumed.) there are evidences of our small talk.

I apologised... many times. MANY TIMES. "don't be sorry" i will have to be sorry because you bashed on me and riri bc of the slur now the whole server bc of dodo?? U can't be that serious. I also mentioned that everyone deserve to be forgiven! guess marie cant accept that. I thought riri was the owner of the gc, of course i had to ask her permission but no. she wasnt the owner. i was dumb enough to not check who's really the admin of the gc. When we had a small conversation about slurs, she mentioned she cant reclaim the N WORD bc others used it?... Although she used it when she just said it TWICE. (ITS NOT A RACISM SLUR, SHES AFRICAN)

i was just trying to make a conversation, setting up a new type of topic since i got really annoyed and uncomfortable, talking about slurs. But, she continued, wouldnt even stop ending the conversation about it. I even try to convince her to bring riri back to the gc since we all wanted to see how she is.

.... okay. do u like.. hate riri or something? The fact she argued with riri, MAYBE ALMOST EVERY WEEK. MAYBE EVERY DAY. its just disgusting how shes treating the others like shes the oldest of the gc. (she tried to boss me, telling me not to say the slurs bc im insensitve) just so you know, vivi educated me more about slurs so i am not going to say it. (thank you vivi)

The text may not be necessary, but can't you tell how bad she is? if your assuming its bc her education system or shes young, i was 13, i rarely got into fights. (like twice a year.) most likely, she's to cause tons of fights. my screenshots:

(Please press to read, it might be hard for you to see!)

This is a dodo situation. you may not know why dodo didn't explain why she didn't say anything or mention her reason about ignoring to chei. here it is.

basically, she was moody (mood swings i think) I understood dodo, i have frustration issues so i get really annoyed like almost everyday. just to clarify, were not bashing on chei, this is just to show evidence about marie and things she said! more evidence when she started being rude to me... (i didnt clip that part but others may have seen it, she said something like "no, i dont want to ❤️" something like that)

shes basically thinking we dont care...

(im at the corner at the top, replying to her.) You can tell i apologised to her like many times. shes basically saying dodo doesnt deserve to defend herself because shes a bully..? do you realize what ur doing. its childish.

evidence from dodo about marie talking about dodo in her post!

i cant. this is just annoying me so bad. why is she only asking me to block her ??? im so confused. (AGAIN, please press these evidences to read!)

wow.. i just dont get whats her problem with dodo, me and riri atp?..

sigh. marie tsk tsk.. i just cant believe this. i assumed she was going to expose me but i guess not?.... also another information.. me and vini were just trying to calm her down but she started bashing on her too.

Thank you to anyone to might be reading this. Again, exposing seems childish but its the best way to do it. its for others to be warned, incase! tags : @y-unrei @n-americano @i-mmaculatus @sugarish

@miujo @i-kyujin @aestradairio @awwriri @atsubie

@aeraras @rkivefr @daddldee @p-oisn @kissunoo

@florescita @fairytopea @purinkiss @hourlyhoon

@lvioung @obdosant @tzulipss @j-eongs @yeritos

@yonkiibums @hcvenue @bitchey @babyvoxgirlie

@swhore @bloomqi @kiyeuo @chaeryeos @y-vna

@y-urios @aestradairio @aesverse

god all of that tags is MAD!!!

[anyacad0]

I am a huge high cloud quintet enjoyer so it may surprise you to learn that I absolutely hate the quest “Clouds Leave No Trace”.

let me explain. I will admit that a lot of it stems from my issues with Jingliu as a character. I appreciate that she’s meant to be cold and detached, but what bothers me is that although she says considers herself to be a sinner alongside Yingxing and Dan Feng, she constantly acts like she’s better than them, criticising them, acting as if their choice was an easy one while hers wasn’t. Her humility feels incredibly insincere, and she becomes very difficult to empathise with as a result.

then there’s the quest itself. I split it into three parts.

one: redundant infodumping

For the first part of the quest, Jingliu, Dan Heng and Yanqing travel to different parts of the Luofu so Jingliu can bid farewell to her past home. It’s basically a plot device for her to drop some lore about Yingxing and Baiheng, which is fine on its own, but the problem is, none of the information she gives is new. All of it was stuff we could already figure out from character stories and other in-game text.

the second issue with this part of the quest is Dan Heng’s presence, or rather, lack of it. Considering he’s the main character tying the quintet subplot into the main story, you’d think he’d be important to the quest focussed on them. But he’s just… there. He says and does pretty much nothing. You could cut him from the whole quest and it wouldn’t be any different.

In fact, Dan Heng also suffers greatly from the timing of the quest. If we look at the voice lines for IL, it’s obvious that he’s a snapshot of Dan Heng shortly after this quest, since he knows Blade is the one who made Cloudpiercer. Ichor Of Two Dragons also seems to take place at the end of this quest. This is an issue because both release in version 1.3, making the quest which takes place in version 1.4 feel like a regression in his character development when actually the story was for some reason out of order.

part 2: Dan Feng gets mischaracterised to hell and back

This is the worst part of the quest by far. Jingliu does her self-righteous monologue and nails the coffin shut by giving the most biased description possible of the Sedition.

she first says that Dan Feng was trying to revive Baiheng. Dan Heng’s and Jingliu’s character stories reveal that this is probably not the case, and that his actual goal was to create another high elder,

she also says that the reason Dan Feng did what he did was selfishness and an inability to accept Baiheng’s death. She fails to mention the fact that the Xianzhou treated him like a convenient weapon instead of an actual person, that he hated how many innocent people died in the war between Aeons, that his people were going extinct because of said war, that he hated how he gave the Xianzhou the power to cause so much death, that he had probably attempted less dramatic rebellions in his past lives to no avail, that the high elder succession was incredibly screwed up and he didn’t want to have to pass that burden on to his next incarnation (granted that lasts part’s only implicit). Not to mention that she didn’t actually bear witness to any of the events she described, only the aftermath.

part 3: Blade monologue

This is the only redeeming quality of the entire quest

he acknowledges that Dan Feng and Yingxing weren’t simply upset with Baiheng’s death, but with the unfairness of everything in general

he expresses genuine regret

and the way he looks up to Jingliu after she tortured him is the only time where that story genuinely presents her as someone who’s done terrible things, showing how she managed to break Blade so badly that he feels thankful for it

in conclusion, do not play this quest if you want to actually understand Dan Feng as a character

[screewithahat]

watching tgm again enjoy my notes . I love this movie

skipping the first 15 minutes bc I only care ab the daggers /silly

mav please PLEASE get a profile picture for your husband thats not just “ice”

rooster I see you looking at hangman’s lips. I see you.

GRR THE WAY HANGMAN CLOSES THE BAR DOORS I LOVE MEN!!!

”damn straight!” hangman just so we’re clear *you* are not straight

“let’s try not to get fired on the first day” sorry I CRINGE SO HARD every time that line is said WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE THAT.

I NEED BRADLEY BRADSHAW CARNALLY

AND JAKE SERSIN GOD THE PUSH-UPS THEIR SO HOT.

hangman watches his boyfriend and this random old man he dosent know beef out in a nose dive and goes whattt the fuckkkkk

”he pulled my papers” bradly rooster bradshaw you said that in the most sad wet pathetic cat voice ever

chilling about and then the flyboys picture come on screen and I get HIT with twink mav. I love him

thinking about how amelia is the only gen z so she could clock all their tea with saying the silliest things and none of them would know what she means

MAVERICK PLEASE FOLLOW THE ROAD LAWS YOU JUSY BLEW COMPLETELY PAST A STOP SIGN. PLEASE. GOD I KNOW YOUR STUPID BUT AT LEAST FOLLOW THE ROAD LAWS !!!!!!!

wait so who exactly is the enemy here. in tg its the soviets bc that’s what the whole movie was made for, get people in the navy to fight in the cold war. WHO DID WE HAVE BEEF WITH IN 2022

rooster I see your gay ass looks at hangman. I know what you are.

hangster is icemav but hangman is mav and rooster is ice im not elaborating that is correct

hangman’s so gay it loops back to misogyny

gay ass push of your boyfriend rooster I see you going for the tit

already crying over my old man icemav and all ice did was text mav

ice has a “wife” (we all know he’s married to mav) but still has a picture of him and his boyfriend framed

mav just wants to talk to his husband bc that’s his husband but his husband said no we have to talk about our job rn I know your struggling you don’t get to bottle it up

”it’s time to let go” so hey, im sobbing. “I don’t know how” I WILL SOB HARDER.

“the only reason im here is you” men will say anything but I love you

MY BABIES (old men) I LOVE THEM SO MUCH WAHHHFHEJWHW WHH I love old men yaoi

OH ID KNOW THAT WISTLE ANYWHERE !!! “football scene came on the screen” I DID TOO

bradley helping his uncle up is actually so sweet like they hate eachother but he’ll help his uncle out :(

BOB MY BELOVED!! I LOVE YOU BOB!!!!

AGAIN MAV. THERE IS A STOP SIGN THERE THAT SOMEONE (YOU) KEEP BLOWING OFF.

skipping another 5 min bc I do not care for mav being in love with a woman in my heart he only has eyes for ice

I ALWAYS CACKLE AT MAV AND AMEILA JUST STARING AT EACHOTHER

I ALWAYS FORGET BOB AND PHEIONIX GO DOWN I KNOW THEIR OKAY BUT MY BABIES

oh shit it’s the pulled my papers scene time to start sobbing BRADLEY MY BABY WAHHHH

”no kids. nobody to mourn you when you burn in.” so hear me out. I jump. MAVERICK IS NOT RECOVERING FROM THAT EVER AURGERRRR BRADLEY YOU BASICALLY ARE HIS KID !!! YOUR HIS GODSON!! HIS NEWPHEW!!! YOU CANT BE SAYING THIS!!!!! (actually he can his hate is justified)

“my dad believed in you. im not gonna make the same mistake.” STOP STIP STOP STIP STIP STOP STIP SOTP

ices funeral :( im gonna stand and salute the whole time idc how cringe I am it makes me so sad. especially now after val passed.

the. the way mav pushes his wings into ices coffin. im. sobbing. curled up in a corner sobbing and holding my knees. crying sobbing pissing shitting

”mav u are grounded >:((“ “nuh uh…”

my cat is watching as eagerly as I am w mav completing this mission to prove it can be done

I like how the screen gets bigger during the more intense scenes . idk random but !! I love film

mav I see you with wings didnt you push those into ices coffin? yeah that’s what I thought you stole ices wings. you gay ass.

boat

“talk to me goose” I shouted so loud my cat looked at me with concern .

bradley you are sooo pretty

“give em hell.” again, men will say anything but I love you.

PLANE!!!!

my mama just called me. she asked what I was doing and when I said watching top gun maverick she let out the loudest sigh and just went “oh jeez…” SORRY MOM I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!

”talk to me dad” so. you just stabbed me. deep. in the heart. my baby.

I like the little fun fact that rooster hitting his head in the pop up wasn’t planned at all it just happened and the directors thought it worked well and left it in

boom explosion explosion

“rooster status!” “HUGB” giggling I know he’s at like 9-10 Gs rn but it’s so funny

“we have to circle back!” THATS HIS UNCLE IM SOBBING.

”do not engage!” you think he’s gonna listen he learned shit from his uncle hes not going to listen

i know mav is getting shot at but he’s gotta be freezing cold with the snow covering him

THE ABSOLUTE LOOK OF DEVASTATION FROM HANGMAN WHEN ROOSTER DOSENT RESPOND THATS HIS BOYFRIEND.

mav pushing rooster to the ground will forever be my favorite thing

“you told me not to think!” “oh fuck I guess I did say that” “yeah. you did.”

“your not serious” bradley be so fr thats your uncle mav he’s ALWAYS serious ab stupid shit

“let’s start running.” “yeah run- run!” MY SHAYLAS!!!! guys I love uncle mav so much it’s my favorite thing besides goose

“why are the wings coming out mav.” my stupid baby I love him so much

“you’d go after them if I wasn’t here.” “but you are here.” MY SHAYLAS

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!” me when math class showed up with letters and numbers below zero

“cmon mav do some of that pilot shit!” I will never get over the parallels of goose and rooster they are my shaylas I love them both so much im gonna explode them

”im sorry goose” JUMPING!

“hey hangman you look good.” “I am good rooster, im very good” MEN WILL SAY ANYTHING. BUT I LOVE YOU.

“please don’t tell me we lost an engine..” “alright! I won’t tell you that”

“captain michell!” “sir!” just call him uncle mav we know you wanna

“thank you for saving my life.” “it’s what my dad would’ve done” IM GOING TO EXPLODE ON THE SPOT

ROOSTER AND MAV WORKING ON THE PLANE TOGETHER MY SHAYLAS MY FAVORITE UNCLE / NEPHEW DUO BUDGEHWHWHAGHRGRRRRJWWAHHHH

roo going to see mav’s little collection of photos and knocking next to his dad i’ll cry

okay banger movie. my sibling came out of their room at the very end and went “didnt you JUST watch that movie” and I did. I did less then a week ago

[wondrluv]

୨୧ the secret's out ; tz11

➪ summary: pictures and text messages of her and her brother's best friend leak and she stays curled up in her room, not talking to anyone. so mason calls up her best friend and soon enough, trevor is on a plane to england

➪ warnings: things being leaked, crying, reader thinks her brothers hate her, crappy friends

➪ word count: 1.3k

➪ emma's notes: red, white, and royal blue is 100% the inspiration to this fic and yes i did basically copy the phone call and speech but its just too cute to ignore. i literally am in love with this movie. part two will be out tomorrow i hope! this would’ve been out earlier but i took a nap (shocking i know)

© wondrluv ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

Nothing was how it should be. They were supposed to be careful, they were careful. They were only seen together when it would make sense for them to be together; when he was in town for a game, when he was supposed to be hanging out with her brothers, or when he had a game against the Devils or the Canucks. And when they were seen together, they made sure everything was strictly platonic: no hand touches, stolen glances, nothing.

However, maybe they should’ve accounted for the fact that one, her friends were journalists, and two, her friends weren’t really her friends in the first place. They had a few classes together in college, back when she was still undecided, but despite that? They only found her interesting because of her last name and who shared it.

Somehow she was too predictable, her password was as basic as it got. It was the day Trevor asked her to be his girlfriend, they’re anniversary. It was the best day of both of their lives but now it was the root of all their problems. It wasn’t the biggest scandal on the dance floor, there were things much worse going on in the NHL and the world in general. No one would care about this besides the Zegras and the Hughes families and the girls who were too obsessed with hockey players and their relationships for their own good.

She was studying abroad in England this past year and she couldn’t help but fall in love with it. She had decided to extend her stay into the fall semester, not wanting to go back home. This sort of worked in her favor, she was 3,444 miles from Jack and Luke and 4,632 miles from Quinn. She was in a different time zone, country, and continent than them. All she had to do to avoid them was not answer her phone. 

She was good at that, blocking out social media and her phone as a whole. Growing up the sister of hockey players and her mom being who she was in the hockey world, she got used to the hate and backlash she got from not wanting to do hockey. Her phone was shut off and thrown into her desk drawer. Her friends tried to comfort her but were to no avail, she was too worried about what other people thought about it.

Not only had pictures of them been put out into the world but their text messages as well. However, she couldn’t remember a time she left her phone unattended. She hadn’t spoken to Trevor in two weeks, she hadn’t spoken to anybody besides her roommates in two weeks. She had seen a couple of articles and videos that were spreading, the one of Trevor’s interviews where he was addressing the situation was not only the biggest one but the most recent one. 

It was before the game, that the reporter had asked him about how everything in the media that was speculating had impacted him and his play. To which he responded with, “Y/n and I are together and have been since the beginning of the season. And whether people choose to support or hate it, isn’t my problem nor my business. We’re happy and hope everyone can support that decision and respect our privacy. I fell in love with a girl who happens to be related to my best friend. How is this affecting my mindset? I wouldn’t say it has, I’m still playling, and Greg still thinks I’m playing as best as I can and even better. I’m worried about her, that’s for sure. She hasn’t had the best track record with the media.”

He said a few more words, none of which mattered to y/n. She wasn’t sure if she cried more because of what he said or the situation. She curled up on the chair in the corner of the room, reading a book. Her friends looked at her sadly, they hated the fact that she had gone back to her reserved nature. 

Trevor on the other hand was acting like it wasn’t bothering him, he couldn’t hide himself from the media or anything really like she could. But, it was eating him alive. He didn’t know if she was okay or if something had happened or if she was ignoring him.  He was too desperate to know if he was okay so he attempted to reach out to all three of her brothers but he got nothing back in return.

It wasn’t until Mason walked into his room with his phone in hand, “I called her friend for you.”

Trevor looked at him with wide eyes, “What?”

“Thank me later.”

Her friend had been walking up the stairs to their apartment when she got the call from Mason, they had met when y/n and Trevor took them along on a trip to ensure that no rumors would start. She had practically run the rest of the way and bolted into the apartment. She walked over to y/n and handed her the phone.

She reached out for it and held it up to her ear, “Hello?”

“Baby!” 

Her voice stuck in her throat along with the sob that had been forming for a while. “Trevor? Oh my god, are you alright?”

“I’m hanging in there. Are you okay?”

She paused, “No. No, I’m not okay.”

“You know what, I’m coming to London tonight. Just hold on until I get there.”

“Hurry please.”

And just as he promised, 8 hours later he was standing in her apartment, opening his arms for her. She ran into them once she heard him call out and buried her head into his chest. Trevor sunk to the floor with her, his back pressed up against the wall, “It’s okay. I’m here. I got you.”

He could feel her body racked with sobs and he couldn’t help but start crying himself. He had torn himself apart these past two weeks as he waited to hear from her and knowing how much she had been in pain had hurt him. He picked her up soon after and carried her to the bedroom, laying her down on the bed. He crawled in next to her and wrapped his arms around her once more.

“Have you heard from your brothers yet?”

“Not a word. Not that I have checked my phone since the article came out.”

He frowned at her, tightening his hold, “Sometimes I wonder if part of their acceptance is just to forget it ever happened in the first place.”

This made him laugh a little as he pulled back to look at her. He moved the piece of hair that had fallen in her face behind her ear. His face changed when he realized that her small smile had turned back into a frown, “I feel so lost. They used to adore me, used to protect me, but now. It feels like they just wish I never existed.”

“Hey, they still love you.” She just blinked at him, “I’m sure if you looked at your phone they would just be wondering if you were okay.”

“I liked your speech, it was very put together.”

He smiled at her, “It made me very proud to be your girlfriend.”

“Hey, I’m always proud to be your boyfriend.”

She giggled and kissed his cheek, “You know what I mean you dork.”

“Speaking of boyfriends and girlfriends. Did you know Mason and Lia were dating?”

She perked up, “No! When did that happen?”

“Apparently-”

“Hey.”

The two turned and looked at Lia, “What’s up?”

“Your brothers are here.”

꒰ MISCELLANEOUS PLAYER TAGLIST ꒱

@toasttt11 @chiblackhawks @pucks-goals-penalties @dancerbailey3 @quinnylouhughesx43

PART TWO ; TZ11 MASTERLIST ; NHL MASTERLIST

TAGLIST ; NAVIGATION

[licorice-and-rum]

SOC and Neoliberlism

So, as promised, here it is my analysis of Six of Crows and how neoliberalism is amazingly portrayed in Ketterdam, and how the city is an example of what happens in a community that is not provided for.

Before we begin, I wanted to say that English is not my first language, and, considering I read SOC in Brazilian Portuguese, I might translate some names literally or differently from the English version but I think it's manageable to read and understand my point. If not, I'll edit the text.

The first thing we have to understand is how neoliberalism works and the theory behind it, and then we'll talk about how it's portrayed in Ketterdam.

So neoliberalism is a theory born more or less at the end of the 20th century (70s-80s), and it finds its roots in laissez-faire capitalism, meaning that it's a political current that tries to suppress and/or eliminate the State's influence from the market. The neoliberalist view understands that the market can supply by itself the population's needs without help or limitations imposed by the State.

The thing here is that most people listen to this and think neoliberalism is about electronics, cars, and other stuff. The truth is, that neoliberalism aims to suppress the presence of State-run facilities in ALL corners of society, such as health care, housing, water access, electricity, etcetera.

So, we can use the American and Brazillian health systems to understand it better, for example:

In the US, the ones providing health care for the population are great corporations - they decide the price of care, they work together with pharmaceutical companies to define medicine prices, and the laws that bind them are pretty much only offer and demand. There is almost none State intervention to provide the population with accessible health care.

However, this brings problems, of course: not everyone (actually, most people) has real access to health care simply because they can't afford it, or they can't afford it without taking a big financial hit, which threatens their other basic needs, such as food, housing, water, electricity, etcetera. Not everyone can provide for their medical needs, such as diabetic and disabled people.

That leads to:

(a) an increase in poverty;

(b) a decrease in educational levels - if you don't have the means to pay for higher educational levels because of health care debt, or if you're sick and need to go to class and tough through it but you're not really learning anything, and so on, which leads to a major workforce in base level production and a minor class who has access to this education;

(c) an increase in overworking people - meaning that we have a lot of people taking on several jobs to be able to pay for things like health care, which increases the competitiveness between people, making individualism levels go up and breaking up human beings' natural sense of community.

I could also talk here about how this breeds isolation and increases the potential for mental health problems but I think you got what I was saying.

On the other hand, we have the Brazilian health care system (SUS), which is a universal gratuitous medical care service through the whole country. Its purpose is not profit, it's providing health care for the community, so therefore, any SUS unit is bound by State law and run by the State. By law, every SUS unit must provide for anyone who enters its premises in need of medical care. Everyone, Brazillian and foreigners, poor or rich, must be treated if they need to. It's the law.

Of course, that doesn't mean it's all rainbows and flowers, there are definitely many problems in SUS. However, what I'm trying to showcase here is that, when the needs of a population are met, the population itself is more resilient, their life quality goes up and so does their participation in their community.

On the other hand, in neoliberalism, when the State is absent from these areas of community service, the market is, in theory, the one providing for the community. In practice, however, what we observe from neoliberal policies in cities with a great poor population in Latam for example, is that when the State doesn't provide for the community, the market is unable to step up for them because of their obscene prices.

The poor population that doesn't have their needs met by the State or the market sees a great boom in criminal activities within their spaces. That's mainly why criminal organizations are so present in slums and favelas throughout Latin America: criminal organizations are a way for the community to provide for themselves and, as a means to become more powerful, they provide for the community in exchange for their services (not to say they do that for the good of their hearts, of course not).

It's why it's so common, for example, that criminal organizations such as PCC in Brazil pay for kids from favelas to undergo Law school, for example.

And that's is where I wanted to go to start the conversation in SOC: one of the main traits of Ketterdam is the Barrel and, in the Barrel, we have the presence of many criminal organizations, such as the Dregs, the Dime Lions, the Menagerie staff (not the girls, ofc), etcetera.

This, as observed by Kaz himself, is one of the only ways to survive on the Barrel - you filiate yourself to a gang because you need to be able to provide for yourself and, more times than others, for your family as well.

Kaz's story is actually a perfect example of how Ketterdam is the representation of America in the early 20th century in full policies of laissez-faire (neoliberalism): as we can see in Titanic and many other historical fictions, the said American Dream had people believing the US to be this economical paradise where they could all enter the market and become millionaires.

The result of it is the Great Depression, of course, but I'm getting ahead of myself here.

When Kaz and Jodi leave Lij for Ketterdam, Jodi believes he'll become a merchant - which is a pretty common belief of those who arrive at Ketterdam, as Pekka Rollins and Kaz himself state in Crooked Kingdom.

The reality of it, though, is much harsher, because the truth is that when you have a market that controls everything, as we see in Ketterdam with the Merchant's Guild (I think that's how it's translated?) and the Stadwatch as a police force, you see perfectly how neoliberal policies really work in real life:

You have a higher class who controls the market and the riches (question: who do you think got the money Shu Han sent to Ketterdam at the beginning of the first book: the people of the city/country or the merchants in the "government"?), and a lower class that, without support from the State or the market to have their needs met will turn to their own means to do so.

So you have the trafficking that brought Inej to the island, the unlimited gambling that Jesper was trapped in, the cons Jodi and Kaz fell for - it's all product of liberal policies.

And so, you have Ketterdam and its neoliberal policies (:

(I really love to make this kind of analysis, please, if you have something you want me to talk about, don't hesitate to ask)

[cleolinda]

I never actually explained why I started playing the Silent Hill 2 remake. As many people have pointed out, it is an absolutely wild choice (complex, difficult, scary, LONG) for my first video game. (I’m a mobile gamer, I wasn’t allowed to play video games as a kid, etc.) 

Since Jacksepticeye has come back to Tumblr, I’ll be a dork and say that I became a big fan of his channel over the last couple of years, and I started watching game playthroughs generally to wind down at night. I’ll basically watch anything he plays, and in October, he played the new remake. I was maybe 20 when the original came out, but I didn’t know shit about Silent Hill. Something about Pyramid Head, The Scariest Games Ever, not really my thing, but sure. I started watching and... didn’t really get into it. Planets weren’t aligned that day, idk. I let it keep running, went on to the second video, and then we hit THIS scene:

That music comes in out of NOWHERE like strong perfume and I was like, what the fuck is this game, why is the acting so good, what is HAPPENING, I love it. 

For several weeks, I was obsessed with the Akira Yamaoka soundtrack (both versions) and the story. The Actual Autism fully kicked in, and it was better than dealing with the rest of November 2024. I watched multiple people play the game, learned everything about it, didn’t care about the combat, never thought I’d play it myself. 

And then, two months into this... I kinda... I kinda wanted to fight a leg monster. A mannequin. THEY ARE SO SASSY AND THEY’RE SMART despite having no heads. I wanted to engage in noble fisticuffs (anklicuffs?) with these things. I am proud to say that I have gone from getting stuck in the parking lot on day one to actually being really good at fighting mannequins. (It’s the lying figures that get me. Fucking splash-damage motherfuckers.) Over ten hours of practice play in the first three levels of the game, I’ve only died twice so far (and both times were when the game BOXED ME IN and swarmed me with vomit monsters. Rude).

So anyway, I decided to play the game, and @idoherty451 and I started discussing it in excessive depth, and now I want to do a text commentary for sure, and a video gameplay (voice) commentary if I can get that up and running; I already have some rough reaction audio that I've been posting. I just want all this (and the software I’m learning) to be a new set of tools in my “having fun discussing media” box, really. That said, I don’t know how far I’ll actually take the practice run, now that it’s fulfilled its purpose and I’ve diagnosed that my hapless ass needs to be on light combat. I’ve even played South Vale 2-3 times to develop basic skills! I’m doing so good! So it’s helped to do a first run, get through “I’m lost for half an hour” snarls, and practice moving the camera more smoothly. I may leave off with playing ahead before I get to the last two bosses years from now at this rate and let y’all see that happen, for better or worse, without any prep. 

The whole premise here is that I want to walk through the game and talk about all the lore and easter eggs and theories I’ve learned about. It will be the opposite of spoiler-free (minus That One Big Thing I won’t give away). If you would like to watch spoiler-free playthroughs of this long-ass game, I also recommend Marz (new to the franchise) and Gab Smolders (huge OG fan). 

Anyway, this is what I’ll be doing tomorrow while actively ignoring U.S. politics. James Sunderland has some very specific problems, and unlike mine, he can hit most of them with a steel pipe. Wish me luck with Pyramid Head. 

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

too many teens whining for validation, this blog needs more weird and stupid so...

AITA for kidnapping my friend and trapping her in the cheesebarn?

Hear me out:

The story starts about a week before my (20 at the time ftm) 21st birthday. If you live in the US you know this isnt just some lame 7th birthday or 36th birthday, this is one of the big boy birthdays, the special ones. Its when you can legal buy alcohol and are therefore truly an adult in the eyes of the law.

Naturally my friends (20s) wanted to do something Big for our 21sts. So they asked me what i wanted to do and i said i didnt really care as long as I got a road trip somewhere with friends.

Everyone thought it was a fun idea but it was a little short notice for everyone to get time off from work, but my other friend we will call C also had her 21st exactly a month after mine to the day, and the two of us agreed to share our 21sts and not do much of anything on my actual birthday. This is important, bc it was a SHARED birthday road trip.

I agree to let C pick the destination and I provide the car. We didnt have much of a plan as we were going to meet up with C's old roommate who lives in the city we picked to show us a good time.

It was 5 of us total and about a 7 hour drive altogether there with not a whole lot on the way there. We get to the city she picked and meet the roommate and honestly the rest of this part is just standard 21st birthday shenanigans. Its when we start the drive home things really start.

Remember its a long drive with not much to see? Well that was a lie. On our way back we see it, the Real "Happiest Place on Earth" as far as places with a mouse for a mascot go:

Grandpa's.

Fuckin'.

Cheesebarn.

Obviously me and the other people on the trip want to stop and see the magic, but unfucking fortunately C happens to be the only Basic White Girl ™️ in the entire world who hates cheese and isnt even lactose intolerant. This girl is notorious for making "petty" and "I hate Cheese" her entire personality. She would constantly make faces and gagging noises and talk about how gross and nasty cheese is if you so much as eat a grilt cheese near her.

Clearly she made it known that she wasnt on board with it. "NO! FUCK YOU ALL IM NOT GOING TO A PLACE CALLED A CHEESEBARN ON MY BIRTHDAY!!" were her exact words.

But i remembered i was driving, it was my car, and it was supposed to be my birthday too. So I put it to a vote. "Raise your hand if you wanna go to Grandpa's Cheesebarn!"

All hands raise but one. With C out voted we head to the cheesebarn.

Guys. This place is amazing. Its obviously making cheese its main draw, but yhere's so much more, its every shitty midwest tourist trap rolled into one glorious place. There's even a chocolate shop. We even got C's roommate to ditch work and come meet us bc shr heard "Grandpa's Cheesebarn" and knew she had to drop everything.

All in all a good visit, C even seemed like she had fun once we got there (she sure spent $300 on candies and dip mixes anyway). We go home. Things seem fine.

Then C drops off the face of the earth.

She wont respond to our calls or texts and at first we thought maybe she was giing through a rough patch or something and try to just keep reaching out but give her space. But then we find out that not only is she still hanging our with our other friends who couldnt make the trip with us. So clearly she's just pissed at us about something.

Finally one day a few months later i catch her at her job and just tell her "I dont care if you hate us, we'll never speak to you again if you dont want us to, but what the hell did we do to you??"

And she just looked me over and says "Well. You kidnapped me."

lolwut

And she yells (bc this girl loves yelling at people) "YOU KIDNAPPED ME AND TRAPPED ME AT A CHEESEBARN ON. MY. BIRTHDAY!!!!!"

And i just said "Well it was my birthday too," and havent spoken to her since. Its been over a decade and "No ragrets" as we said back in the day, but uts baffled me for years that that was her reaction. "Im just over you guys" i can understand, and its not like she was shy about telling people she hates them and their out of her life ever before. And from what i ended up hearing from our other friends she kept talking with it really was about the cheesebarn and how we "ruined her birthday".

No but srsly AITA??? For making her go to a cheesebarn???

What are these acronyms?

[pixeltwix]

⚠️Emma May & Ciphertology⚠️

-Backpacking off of my theory from yesterday!! Very long text post incoming-

I’m of the mind where not only do I believe Emma May’s family was in a cult, but that they continued to practice its teachings after being disbanded. From here this is just my own personal ramblings as I have a very long and personal take on Emma May and Fiddleford’s lives and history as a whole and separately. Today will be dedicated to Em’s side (ft her families designs as well :3 )

Emma May’s father, Dale Dixon, is the older brother of Madeline Dixon- the teenage girl who was one of the first to be swayed by this Silas Birchtree. It’s implied she fell for him in place of her boyfriend at the time, but I choose to believe this was a lingering affection she’d keep for life in her worship.

Being a young man at the birth, peak, and end of Ciphertology already with a wife and children, Dale was too closely wooed by the teachings of Silas and the inter-dimensional being that was Bill Cipher. He was a bit of a cult kiss ass, if you will. He’d be the first to do whatever Silas would suggest or order of the cults people and the man was happy to do it. Be it shaving his head and painting on an eye or attempting to build the portal he had zero qualifications for alongside everyone else.

Naturally after the cult was disbanded and everyone was put into witness protection, while Dale accepted the state relocation for his family (to Virginia) he refused any government aid beyond that. Instead dragging his young family and sister into the woods where he constructed a shabby little home for them. A home where no one would contradict his word and he could continue the teachings of Ciphertology.

Emma May was born only a few short years later. And while her father had already named one of her older brothers as a namesake to his idol, Silas, her mother named her in turn for her secret idol, Emmaline Butternubbins. She knew Dale would never accept the original name, so she did what she could to compromise- it was a cope of sorts. Thelma Lou, Em’s mother, unfortunately has no say in her husbands madness and is slowly being broken down to the cult. While she had some resistance when Em was born it wouldn’t last too terribly long as soon every adult figure in the family believed in Ciphertology.

Growing up in the middle of nowhere Appalachia’s, Emma May didn’t have much outside influence other than the mini cult community her father had created over the years within neighboring people. She knew no different than the madness and basic cult ideas of ‘have as many kids and wives as you want just so we can create more followers’ sort of mindset. The only hiccup was that Emma May was never dumb, she wasn’t so easily swayed by the triangles teachings, she always internally questioned everything- no matter what adult was telling her things she always was left with a feeling of ‘is that really true though?’

She kept such thoughts to herself, assuming she wouldn’t have to actually do anything notable within the cult, she was shocked and horrified when at the age of 15 her father was bringing her before an older man to marry. An older man who already had a handful of wives. She knew even if she was older she wouldn’t want this life, seeing upfront her mothers decay in the cult and the mass of siblings that she had..she didn’t want that. She wanted an education, basic rights, and just? Freedom from this. She didn’t know if the outside world would be different, but at that point she didn’t much care. She wanted out and she needed out fast.

Running away from home before the official marriage ceremony she remains on the run until she makes it to Fredericksburg, VA. A bustling friendly town that otherwise left her feeling like she was in an alien world. She looked straight out of the early 1900s in a wave of hip and groovy late 1960’s styles. While she couldn’t read anymore than simple words she skimmed through the phone book of a nearby cafe, and while unable to find any Dixon outside of her indoctrinated family she found hope in searching for names under her mothers maiden name, ‘Finch’. 

Discovering a man in Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey, by the name of Benjamin Finch she manages to find her mothers estranged brother. A man her mother was forced to shun and block out the second he expressed concern over her involvement in a cult. Thankfully upon learning who she was he was more than happy to shelter her, albeit he only lived in a trailer as he practically lived in the museum he worked at. Making her way up the East coast, Emma May finds herself in Jersey, her uncle slowly acclimating her to modern life. Teaching her how to read, to write, and most importantly teaching her the reality of the world. Luckily he wasn’t a religious man of any sorts and rooted her in modern thoughts of science, feminism, and other new age ideas of the time.

Once he felt she was ready he let her attend Glass Shard High, getting the education she always wanted despite struggling to understand the basics. This didn’t get her down though as she was determined to graduate someday. Instead she tracks down local nerd and idea enthusiast, Stanford Pines, someone she hardly finds to be ‘a freak’ considering her cultish upbringing was beyond bizarre (plus she learned from an early age to find beauty in the ‘odd’ or ‘weird’) Befriending a young Ford and learning from him she also befriends Stan, someone who was more than willing to help her break out of her docile and dainty shell. Stan’s girlfriend at the time, Carla McCorkle was equally happy to teach her the modern idea of feminine rather than beaten to death old book concepts. Living in Jersey, in short, was slowly thawing her from the confines of her upbringing- developing into the life she always wanted and frankly? She was thriving!

She was also gaining her own beliefs in this time. Such as ‘marriage is stupid’ and ‘having kids is stupid, I’m never going to have them’ sort of mindset. Thanks to her upbringing she swore then and there that she would never have a family of her own. So, that’s what makes her next phase of life particularly ironic.

After the science project incident in senior year between the Pines brothers the friend circle would face a brutal falling out, the only one keeping in touch with everyone being Emma May herself. Stan is kicked out and the brothers aren’t talking, Carla breaks up with Stan and refuses any more connection to the Pines, and Em is left in limbo to comfort and appease everyone whilst ignoring her own feelings about it all. Between the late night girl talks with Carla, keeping Ford off the edge, and letting Stan stay with her in the trailer it was only a matter of time before her juggling attempts would fall.

And that’s exactly what happened- after Ford discovers she’s been harboring Stan he can’t help the rush of anger, insecurity, and betrayal that someone he considered his only friend left to hide that from him. Also afraid of losing a friend who’s done so much for her in her cult unlearning she’s quick to prove her loyalty. Packing her bags after graduation she joins Ford to Backupsmore to continue supporting him, taking up a diner job beside campus and shacking up in a cheap apartment. She continues secretly offering Stan money when she can as she still feels guilt for her decision, but it becomes less frequent as she’s now supporting herself financially on her own.

But of course her sole company of Ford wouldn’t last forever. Especially when all she tends to hear from him is how cool his roommate is and how’s he’s thrilled to be around another intellectual mind for once. And while he was hesitant to introduce his two friends to one another it was quick history after that-

Em absolutely deals with a lot of survivors guilt and general fear (lots of ‘I can’t believe I left my younger siblings behind, what if thEY were forced to marry that man in my place?!’ and ‘what if the cult tracks me down and forces me back home?!’) and on top of that I already feel she’s got some religious based ptsd and some bpd in there as well, but I think that would make her more endeared to Fiddleford when they first meet. A man who was pretty open about his own anxiety and ocd (idk if that’s a popular hc, but him having ocd makes so much sense to me) definitely helped her understand herself better and the two of them absolutely developed ways to help one another with it. They become each other’s safe spaces essentially <3

I feel like all of this is something I could talk about for hOURS, but I feel I’ve already typed up enough for today. So take this all as you will :) it’s just been super fun rewriting the story I had for her. I always envisioned her to be a teen runaway and living with her estranged uncle in Jersey, but now it makes even more sense plugging in my cult theory. But anywho, I hope this was an enjoyable for y’all to read as it was for me to type