#sometimes I feel really shy about saying I like something and being Perceived

[cleolinda]

I never actually explained why I started playing the Silent Hill 2 remake. As many people have pointed out, it is an absolutely wild choice (complex, difficult, scary, LONG) for my first video game. (I’m a mobile gamer, I wasn’t allowed to play video games as a kid, etc.) 

Since Jacksepticeye has come back to Tumblr, I’ll be a dork and say that I became a big fan of his channel over the last couple of years, and I started watching game playthroughs generally to wind down at night. I’ll basically watch anything he plays, and in October, he played the new remake. I was maybe 20 when the original came out, but I didn’t know shit about Silent Hill. Something about Pyramid Head, The Scariest Games Ever, not really my thing, but sure. I started watching and... didn’t really get into it. Planets weren’t aligned that day, idk. I let it keep running, went on to the second video, and then we hit THIS scene:

That music comes in out of NOWHERE like strong perfume and I was like, what the fuck is this game, why is the acting so good, what is HAPPENING, I love it. 

For several weeks, I was obsessed with the Akira Yamaoka soundtrack (both versions) and the story. The Actual Autism fully kicked in, and it was better than dealing with the rest of November 2024. I watched multiple people play the game, learned everything about it, didn’t care about the combat, never thought I’d play it myself. 

And then, two months into this... I kinda... I kinda wanted to fight a leg monster. A mannequin. THEY ARE SO SASSY AND THEY’RE SMART despite having no heads. I wanted to engage in noble fisticuffs (anklicuffs?) with these things. I am proud to say that I have gone from getting stuck in the parking lot on day one to actually being really good at fighting mannequins. (It’s the lying figures that get me. Fucking splash-damage motherfuckers.) Over ten hours of practice play in the first three levels of the game, I’ve only died twice so far (and both times were when the game BOXED ME IN and swarmed me with vomit monsters. Rude).

So anyway, I decided to play the game, and @idoherty451 and I started discussing it in excessive depth, and now I want to do a text commentary for sure, and a video gameplay (voice) commentary if I can get that up and running; I already have some rough reaction audio that I've been posting. I just want all this (and the software I’m learning) to be a new set of tools in my “having fun discussing media” box, really. That said, I don’t know how far I’ll actually take the practice run, now that it’s fulfilled its purpose and I’ve diagnosed that my hapless ass needs to be on light combat. I’ve even played South Vale 2-3 times to develop basic skills! I’m doing so good! So it’s helped to do a first run, get through “I’m lost for half an hour” snarls, and practice moving the camera more smoothly. I may leave off with playing ahead before I get to the last two bosses years from now at this rate and let y’all see that happen, for better or worse, without any prep. 

The whole premise here is that I want to walk through the game and talk about all the lore and easter eggs and theories I’ve learned about. It will be the opposite of spoiler-free (minus That One Big Thing I won’t give away). If you would like to watch spoiler-free playthroughs of this long-ass game, I also recommend Marz (new to the franchise) and Gab Smolders (huge OG fan). 

Anyway, this is what I’ll be doing tomorrow while actively ignoring U.S. politics. James Sunderland has some very specific problems, and unlike mine, he can hit most of them with a steel pipe. Wish me luck with Pyramid Head. 

[trustmypoison]

Seventeen with a cautious crush/partner

Genre: comfort, angst

TW/CW: allusions to past trauma, but no specific scenarios - just the possible reactions you might have to it.

A/N: no specific traumas are mentioned because every single trauma is valid. There will be a lot of If statements in this in an effort to not exclude anyone. I understand that this is a sensitive topic. Be kind to yourselves and skip if it’s not the right time for you to read this. 🖤

Clocked it immediately upon meeting you - Jeonghan, Wonwoo, The8, Vernon

Totally perceptive and emotionally intelligent. Upon meeting you they will know there’s something behind that wall you keep up. It’s okay. He’s nothing if not patient. He may try to get you to relax with his sense of humor, but what will really do the trick is the careful consideration for your comfort. Don’t want to be touched? Done and he’ll make sure no one else does either. Don’t like loud or crowded spaces? He’s guiding you somewhere a little more secluded for a breath of fresh air or skipping the event all together to do something else with you. Too nervous or down to eat? He’s softly urging you to try something light to see if it will make you feel better. Can’t sleep? He’s offering a phone call or maybe even a walk around the block to clear your head. He likes that you let him in even a millimeter when he asks if something will help you. He’ll keep quietly supporting you without the promise of being let in completely, but if you do let him in he’ll be elated.

Picks up on little signs along the way - Seungcheol, Joshua, Woozi, Seungkwan

Might take that wall you have up as simply being shy, which he finds cute and will even tell you so. But there are little things that start to add up the more time he spends with you. Touches make you squirm. Or loud sounds make you jump more than most people. Or sometimes you seem a little checked out if too many people are around. Whatever those little hints are, he’s not totally surprised if you’re hot and cold and he’s starting to understand that it’s unintentional. He tries to be a comfort to you when you’re in a cold phase because he really just wants to be a safe space for you to turn to. And he’ll encourage the hot phases with a lot of enthusiasm. If you let the relationship progress, he’ll let you set the pace with gentle checkins to make sure you’re still comfortable. Your willingness to let the walls down even a bit means the world to him because it means you trust him. He’ll be so so so careful with that trust.

Might take a big moment to realize - Jun, Hoshi, Seokmin, Mingyu, Dino

Might not even read your reactions as shyness, but rather dislike or distaste for him. He’s not sure what he did at first and the perceived rejection might sting. He might not even observe long enough to see that you’re like that with just about everyone because he heard your silent message for distance and he’s giving it to you. I hate to say it but it might take a pretty big negative reaction for him to realize that there’s something more below the surface. Like seeing you crying or having a panic attack or looking terribly uncomfortable around someone, anything of that sort. He’ll step in without a second thought, asking how he can help. He knows it’s the desperation of the situation that has you accepting his help, but he’s okay with that because he gets it now. So so careful from that point forward. You have a full time body guard now that would like to be your boyfriend if you let him.

[nostalgicmiscellaneous]

This is long, but i need to get this out of my chest:

I have made so many post defending Penelope when people talked about her issues, her traumas but right now i feel like defending Colin.

As a woman, sometimes i naturally tend to feel defensive and shield the girl but i need to be fair here. Colin's feelings and trust were deeply hurt, Colin is insecure, soft, thoughtful, introspective, sensitive and suffers with a inferiority complex, and he struggles to know his place in society and among the people he loves, on what he should do and the expectations of society from a 22 years old man.

What many don't seem to realize is that Colin, even before knowing Penelope is LW, was very insecure about what she loves in him ( and even if she did in fact love him, because she was about to marry someone else), about being worth of her, he says he wants to do something, to publish his diaries because he wants her to be proud of him…he already didn't think he was good enough for and to her. Colin is insecure about not being good enough in every aspect of his life, tbh. His lack of purpose, faith in himself and on others loving him from whom he is runs deep. His moment of vulnerability telling how much Penelope not answering to his letters affected him, his family too was very revealing. Him screaming at Pen with tears in his eyes that he felt foolish that she read his diaries and praised him as something special. This is something i've noticed even in other seasons too. The family not caring much about his need to connect and his somewhat strained relationship with Anthony, who wasn't really a good male figure to him. It's about male ego? A bit, but it's deeper than that in the series.

Another issue is, he put Pen in a pedestal too ( much like Pen did until 2x8), to be honest, and that is never a good thing, because people are not perfect. And he needed to learn all that. There is disappointment there. But, again, it goes further. It’s him not knowing her as he thinks he should. It’s him perceiving her humanity but reflecting on his own. We have to remember he's so happy because Pen chose him, because he thinks now he's someone's priority and he's someone's focus. He has the immature idea that you should be everything in every way to the person you love, and if you can't be their protector and the hero in their eyes, why should anyone love you?

Then he finds out…and his worldview crumbles. Not only Penelope broke his trust and hurt him deeply - and she never told him and never would have - and it wasn't just himself but his family too, but she shattered his belief he knew and connected with her better than almost anyone else, she shattered his barely there newly found confidence and sense of purpose, what he thought was his sense of self now. All modern sensibilities tend to be ruffled about this, but i think it's a fitting conflict that he would have issues with her being so self-sufficient, so successful while he believes himself to be less, way less than her, so to Colin she doesn't need him, and if she doesn't need him, why would she love him? Why should she love him?

Again, there is the side of him conflicted about knowing her. The pedestal was broken, because she lied to him. She is this powerful, talented, successful woman on her own, not just the pretty shy girl with sweetness and great witty personality that he loves, the one that thinks the world of him. She talked about him, she criticized him and while it rings true deep down, it rings devastation, because she could see beyond his farce and it makes him look and feel pathetic.

So he's struggling with two things: on how to love her, all of her, and how to feel good enough for her, love himself. He's trying to accept her new wonderful aspects and her hurtful flaws because he never stopped loving her, in no moment we see anything but love when that man looks at her, when that man is crying because of her and his deep sadness and longing, his anger is laced with so much love for her. He's angry at her but mostly at himself and he needs to figure it out a way to feel like he deserves to be loved by her. It fuels his issues and he also over compensates.

His hang ups with LW becomes his tangible target. Not only he sees as a dangerous thing to her, it puts her at risk, and with that in mind he can put himself in a role of her protector again, but he fixates on the idea that without Whistledown she's the Pen that he can believe is able to love him even if he's not good enough. Without Whistledown she's not so much above him and not so far from him, because Whistledown is her critical eye, it's Penelope appraising people very analytically and if she looks closely, he doesn't think she will see much in him, as she proved before with he S3 ep1 comment. He wants to get rid of it.

Sure, he's jealous too, he envies her success but exactly because he resents how much that makes him less worthy. It's also another thing that he thinks she's putting above him. He couldn't see clearly that it wasn't something outside herself (and he gets it after), but part of who she is, and all of those parts loves him. It's foolish and it's nonsensical because he doesn't understand that she has seen his flaws but she loves him anyway. He needed reassurance just as much as Pen needed. He needed her to keep on telling she loved him and why, because it heals him.

Some people were upset he didn't make love to her that day he went to get a blanket, but i get it. He wants it, he wants her so badly, you can see it. Colin has problems communicating and doing what he wants because he feels pathetic, jealous and that makes him feel worse, makes him feel shame. It’s him, not her that was the issue at that point. His connection with her runs deeper, it's respecting her and himself, with all the conflicted feelings why he didn’t.

It’s a slow process and i’m bloody glad it took its time to be resolved. But he starts understanding that his way wont help them, it wont bring them closer. He wont solve things by controlling and being the hero. He can’t change the past, he can’t change who they are. He wont solve anything by repressing his love.

Pen words help him figuring out a lot, her spoken words directed to him and her written words that he reads again. She needs him. She tells him she needs him and his love, not grand actions. He can show love and be worthy by supporting her. He starts to understand and ACCEPT that Whistledown is Pen, and loving Pen will include that part of her personality. He grasps that it was always there and it never made a difference in how much she loved being around him and him her, how much attention she dedicated to him, how much her words, in her letters, were full of admiration for him, to her love to him, how much she is his special person. She needs him just as much he needs her, she needs his love, his charm, his intelligence, his humor, his integrity, she needs him because without him she doesn’t feel complete, she doesn’t feel happy. He’s a good man, a fine man that makes her happy, always have. And he realizes she inspires him, she always had, and that isn't a problem, that having her helping him is not a problem, because he helps her too in many ways. It’s only when he can accept himself as equal and entitled to her love as she is to his that they could truly be together and happy.

Colin had the right to feel hurt, had the right to have his insecurities, had the right to need time and had the right to need space, had the right to lash out, had the right to come to term with the changes and surprises life threw at him, specially as a sensitive person that he very much is, and i'm glad the show didn't rush that.

[vroomvroomcircuit]

Sometimes you need to be loud before it can be quiet

Summary: Everyone has their breaking point, even prefectly fine media trained drivers. Especially when people start asking dumb, sexist questions.

Pairing: driver!reader x f1!grid, but mostly Daniel Ricciardo and Max Verstappen, Lando and Charles have a bit of a guest appearing

Wordcount: 1.2k (she is a shy shorty, please be nice to her)

🏎Masterlist🏎 _________________________

“My next question is for (Y/N): What do you want to be perceived as?”

Everyone in the post race press conference halts in their movements. (Y/N) blinks once, twice before she clears her throat and gets closer to her microphone. “I’m sorry, can you please elaborate on that? I fear my English is failing me to comprehend what you just said.”

The reporter is not hesitating, jumping into his explanation right away, as if he had chosen the words he wanted to say beforehand. “Well, you participate in a male dominated sport, being currently the only female on the grid line up. You are never seen in typically female clothing. You even wore a suit to the last FIA gala. We have yet to see you in makeup outside of festivities. That’s why I am asking what you want to be perceived as. A man? A woman? Or something in-between?”

Silence has never been so loud. Nobody really knows how to respond to such an audacity.

(Y/N) pulls her microphone another bit closer before murmuring into it: “I rather be not perceived at all. Thank you for the question, I wanted to clear that bit up for quite some time now.”

Her answer brought a booming laughter out of the one and only Daniel Ricciardo, effectively breaking that spell of awkwardness that has been cast over the room by Mr Audacity. Everyone relaxes and joins in the laughter.

As the media representative is about to call onto the next journalist, Max asks a question. “Can we all answer this? Because I want to make it clear, I identify as a problem and want to be perceived as that.”

“Yeah”, Daniel interjects,”of course you do. I want to be perceived as a menace to human kind, please. What about you, Lando?”

“Number 1 Fish Hater, certified and trademarked already,” he answers with a cheeky smile.

Charles breathes “I’m a hot mess” into his microphone before the media representative is able to call onto the next person.

The following race weekend the drivers stand in the media pits with their PR managers, hopping from interviewer to interviewer like at a speed dating event.

“-overall I would say we have a good pace. I’m confident in the team to help us through this race in spite of the unpredictable weather conditions this weekend.” (Y/N)’s answers the usual questions that are thrown at her after sessions.

The journalist smiles at her. “I am sure of that. Now, onto my last question: Last week you have been asked what you want to be perceived as and you never really answered that. Why is that?”

(Y/N) throws a not amused look towards the woman. “I didn’t feel like it. I didn’t want to answer a question that is just a poorly disguised attack towards my femininity. I can like fast cars and dress however I want without having to answer something like that. I’m secure enough in my own gender identity as a woman to be able to express myself in all the ways I want without having my actions impede on my identity or expression of my gender. I will put on a dress when I feel like it, I will get the brushes out for a glam makeup when it is convenient for me and I don’t have to do ‘typically female’ things just to please the public opinion.

Instead of going around and judging, just work on why you have this urge to comment on my expression of gender in the first place, because your insecurities surrounding my gender don’t look cute on you.”

After that (Y/N) is practically dragged away from the media pit by her PR manager, who probably already has a headache thinking about the mess that will follow on social media and certain online magazines.

But the few drivers who stood around them, having media duties to follow themselves, just stared impressed and with deep respect after the young woman. She usually is softer spoken and obviously went through bootcamp media training. This was the first time they witnessed speaking her true mind in an interview.

Back in her driver's room, where she gets ready for the debrief, (Y/N) realizes the kind of mistake she just made.

Her little outburst will definitely get more of a reaction than it would if a Max Verstappen would have said something along these lines.

Before her inner eye she sees the headlines. Something about women being too emotional for motorsports. Her being too young, too hot headed, too much of everything and somehow not enough of everything.

The team will replace her, the negative PR not leaving them any other choice. The pressure on them is too much, they already took a big chance on her by giving the driver a seat in Formula 1 in the first place.

With the news of her sudden contract ending, at least one news outlet will write “The little experiment failed”, paving an even more difficult path for other women trying to prove themselves in motorsports.

And all that just because she wasn’t able to let this stupid question roll right off her back.

A sudden knock on her door breaks (Y/N) free from her downward spiral of thoughts. Max enters the room with Daniel on his tail. “This was amazing. How you told this interviewer off on life camera? And her face? After you went out, we just had to clap. It was so cool. You were so right, too. I’m so proud you finally spoke your mind. The audacity of these people.”

It seems like Max doesn’t need to breathe, judging from his rant.

Daniel has a much softer approach. He puts a hand on her shoulder, making her look up at him. “I hope you know that you had to say that back there. Even if you are ‘only’ a rookie this season, the questions you got the last couple of weeks were anything but ok or nice. Sometimes you need to be loud before it can be quiet.”

(Y/N) shoots him a thankful smile, squeezing the hand on her shoulder with her own. “You are right. It was just a bit overwhelming at first. But I can see the appeal now. I think I have to take a few classes with Max, because the concept of saying what you think got a new fan and that’s me. It’s the best thing I have done in the context of handling media duties.”

“No, you won’t do that”, (Y/N)’s PR manager stands in the doorway, probably to fetch her for the debrief. “In this case it was a good thing to do. Important, too, of course. The fans are eating this up on social media. They already made edits with the clips. But I don’t get paid what Max’ or Lando’s managers get, so you will return to your media trained good girl roots.” With that (Y/N) gets pulled out of the room by her. Max throws her a subtle nod, to which she smiles.

Sometimes you need to be more than the good girl, especially if it’s for your own sake. Who knows, maybe this is the beginning of the story of another media-nightmare-driver.

[504py]

Yandere Prussia Relationship Headcanons

Gender neutral, no use of Y/N, NSFW, murder, kidnapping mention, stalking, long post ahead!

we're SO BACK JOE. i apologize in advance if i write him strangely 😭😭🙏 but here it is! come get y'all juice!! slowly coming back to hetalia, so my inbox is once again open!!! hope y'all like it!

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

How the relationship started...

Gilbert is a very competitive man, and he can't help but be attracted by challenges, even if those challenges are ones that he himself proposes and the other party is completely unaware. This is what has unfortunately happened between you two, and it all started when you rejected his advances towards you.

I apologize for saying this, but I feel that Gilbert is a bit of a "nice guy". He saw you initially as just some pretty person he could fool around and flirt with, but you, obviously, saw right through his act, and said something that stuck with him.

"Are you normally this pathetic?"

He's taken aback, and his red irises shake a little.

Of course, he's used to insults being flung his way, what with how he acts, but a shot to how cool he perceives himself to be would stick.

His white brows crease his previously smirking face, before snapping back.

"Well fuck you too!"

Gilbert wouldn't have any contact with you following this interaction for a long while, and while he tries to forget you and erase you from his memory, you and your words have been laser-burnt into the creases of his brain. You and your damned smile when you look at anyone other than him, the softer tone your voice takes when you talk to other people, versus how your voice seems to have been drained of all enthusiasm and feels like it's a knife dripping with venom when Gilbert talks to you. Why didn't he deserve that nice treatment, too? Was he not even deserving of a small smile from you? He wants you to like him, too. He wants to be the person you like the most; to be the best.

Which resulted in him showing up at your door one evening with flowers and your favorite takeout.

Why does he know your address and why does he know your favorite food and flowers, you ask? Don't worry about it (He was obsessively stalking your social media during the month he was gone).

Gilbert apologizes to you, he sounds sincere, and like the oh-so kind person you are, or maybe you just wanted the food and flowers, you let him into your home.

Expectations...

Gilbert is a very insecure man. His only expectation is for you to look at only him and to love him only. Perhaps he wants you to love him the same way he loves you, obsessively, but he does like the challenge.

He feels like, maybe, if he can fully prove himself to you one day and have your validation, only then can he truly see himself as worthy, as the best for you.

He would have a lot of tunnel vision when it comes to you. To Gilbert, the rest of the world doesn't matter, because you are his whole world. He does tend to look pretty stupid because of it sometimes, but he couldn't care less.

You want him to cook and clean around the house? He'll do it.

You want him to change up his style even if he doesn't really like it? Of course he will!

You want him to carry all the bags while you're out shopping? In a heartbeat. Plus, he gets to show off his strength too. He'd carry you too if you allowed it.

Even if he tries his best not to come off as cocky, he really does like showing off. Being with you has sort of domesticated him, so he'd be a lot more shy about making a show of himself.

I think he'd act like this irregardless on if you accepted him as your boyfriend or not, if anything, I think he'd be even more of a doormat if you refuse to accept him.

He'd get crazier and crazier with his attempts to prove himself to you, such as buying extravagant gifts, doing anything and everything under the sun and moon for you, hell, he'd even legally change his name if you didn't like it.

If you still don't accept him despite everything he's done, I think he'd snap and just take you. He'll keep you with him so you won't run away and he can have as many attempts as it takes to prove himself to you.

But I imagine you'd cave from the guilt and persistence, and eventually accept him. At which, he'd literally scream from relief and happiness and swing you around, before realizing how rough he's being with you and hurriedly putting you back down and apologizing.

Yet he still has that wide toothy grin the whole time, and he keeps petting your hair and holding your face in his hands adoringly. It feels that, from that moment on, there would never be a moment where he'd be unhappy ever again, and he'd never allow you to be unhappy either as long as he's around.

It is genuinely very hard to make this Gilbert upset, because there are very few things that do...

Punishments...

Gilbert really hates it when you express any sort of affection towards anyone or anything other than him.

Yes, anything. He gets jealous if you show too much affection over his dogs or fawn over them too much. I'm seriously saying this, I think he'd later show up with a collar around his neck, crawling on the ground and rubbing his head against your thigh like a mutt. This could either come off as comedic or attractive depending on you, but either is a win in Gilbert's book, since at least he's got your attention now.

If you have any personal toys of your own, he'd get kinda emotional and ask you to throw them away, then ask what they do that he can't. In some time (and by that I mean later that night, maybe even right away), he'd prove that he can provide you with so much more pleasure and relief than those toys ever could.

Probably even to a fault, he'd keep overstimulating you and forcing orgasms till he was satisfied, till he believed that it was drilled into your brain that only he could do these sorts of things to you. And, also, that if you make him jealous like this again, it'll be another one of these long, torturous, sweaty nights...

I guess these aren't really punishments to a lot of people, because in my book only one thing could make him so genuinely upset that he'd be anything other than doting towards you, and that would be flirting with someone else. He'd try to deny it, but then he'd be inconsolable and crying for weeks, having nights where he'd be begging you to say that it never happened, or that the other person meant nothing to you.

"They r-really mean nothing to you? You mean it, babe?"

Then an idea pops into Gilbert's head, one that makes his heart rate pick up and his pupils dilate.

He kisses you, says that he loves you, says goodnight, then he'd be eerily... calm for the next few days. Usually he'd be more skittish and closed-off following whatever you did, but now he's acting like nothing ever happened.

Until one day, he shows up with that other person, bound and gagged, and a gun.

"G-Gil, what is thi-"

"They mean nothing to you, right?"

"Y-Yes, but-"

Then the gun fires, and it happens so quickly that you can barely process it.

This is only a hypothetical scenario, if you were ever to do something like that. It'd be really easy for Gilbert to slip into a psychosis and believe he was doing the right thing by murdering someone.

If anything, he sees it as another means of proving himself.

"There's no one else who would kill for you like I could."

All in all, he isn't easy to anger, but unfortunately I can't say the same thing about him and murder...

Rewards...

Luckily, as long as you're fully loyal to him, all you'd have is a boyfriend who is doting to a total fault.

As long as you've got a good tolerance for cringe, being with Gilbert should be relatively stress-free.

Gilbert's love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch. You could imagine what the two combined would be... Yeah, he's got a huge praise kink.

But as for ways he shows his love towards you, it's definitely acts of service and gift giving. He lilkes gloating a lot, and that's especially true when it comes to the two of you.

He enjoys showing you off. He likes buying gaudy things for you and himself– a huge fan of matching outfits– and taking you out on flashy dates. If you're comfortable with being posted on his social media, best believe he'd be spamming his with you ALL the time. Even if you're not being physically being shown, he'd write about you in his tweets, captions, and stories constantly.

"CHECK OUT THIS EPIC BAG I GOT FOR MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!"

And around twenty-eight people respond like "Didn't you just get them one the other day??"

If you're one to hop between interests and hobbies a lot, or just have any hyperfixations in general, best believe Gilbert will be fueling them LOL.

Gilbert can be really overbearing with his affections, but to him it's just because you deserve it so much. Only the best for the best, right?

He can't help it either, the most rewarding thing he's ever felt is that feeling he gets after he gives you a gift or does something for you. You get this adorable look on your face, smiling at him like he was the stars in the sky and singing out the sweetest compliments and thanks. It's all so worth it.

Normally I'd delve into what Gilbert would love to receive from his partner in return, but in all seriousness, I really do think all he wants is praise and your sole affection.

Like Alfred in my last headcanon post, Gilbert is really noisy, but I think he'd willingly make an effort to change that for you. Not because you asked for it or anything, but just cause, this way, he can appreciate all the tiny little things about you even more.

He realized this, when, one day, he noticed you frown a little before you smile. He wonders why he's never noticed this, and he realizes it's because he closes his eyes right when he starts to laugh. He starts to wonder what other little details about you he's missing out on, so he watches you more carefully in that effort.

Inadvertently, this has made him more calm and quiet since he's so concentrated on you. He likes it, though.

I think, what punctuates Gilbert's character here, is his willingness to change and bend for love's sake.

He does say he loves you very often, to the point of it being annoying sometimes, but he sincerely does mean it. He doesn't say it as just fluff.

However, you'll feel it most with the way he looks at you.

"You have a mole on your back. Did you know that, babe?"

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

(art used is mine, so please do show it some love on my blog as well! thinking of starting a taglist?)

[skyenish]

Have you played Jamils ceremonial robes vignette? What did you think about him getting seemingly flustered/shy when Kalim praised him?

I think it’s cute! I always love it when Jamil acts all embarrassed. If you want to know my thoughts on a deeper level, I think that it says a lot about Jamil. Obviously we can see that even though he’s desperate for praise, he still gets flustered when he gets it and tends to shy away from attention. This could be a deeply ingrained habit he has from always having to redirect any attention and praise towards Kalim, or it could be a sign that he doesn’t truly want praise and attention as much as we think.

Now, I believe it’s a mix of both. Most of us already understand why this would be an ingrained habit, so I want to instead explore the other possibility now!

Jamil doesn’t really want to be the best or be worshipped, we know that what he truly wants is to be free, to travel the world. What makes Jamil truly happy, what he truly wants, is that, traveling the world and being free. What he thinks he wants is attention and praise and recognition, because that’s what’s always been taken from him.

We know Jamil is very aware of how he’s perceived, and I’m sure he doesn’t like being perceived as weak or dumb or incapable, so letting Kalim always be better at him stings. But Jamil, who is only 17 and increasingly emotionally constipated (like half the twst characters), immediately swung the other way, overcorrecting. I think Jamil in some cases tends to see really black and white, and since he doesn’t like dumbing himself down for Kalim and Kalim getting all the praise that he doesn’t deserve, that must surely mean that what he wants is that exact praise, right?

I’m not saying he doesn’t want praise, we’ve seen how he shines in the VDC and how he loves being appreciated, but my theory is that he doesn’t want it as much as we’re lead to believe due to his overblot acting the way it did. Being praised like that brings attention to yourself, it puts the spotlights on you, and Jamil doesn’t like being out on the spot (he’s more of a planning ahead guy). I think when his overblot demanded praise and worship, it was more for the powertrip and not as much just for the praise, if you get what I mean? Jamil loves controlling things and being in control and tends to be pretty paranoid when he isn’t in control, and having his hypnotized servants praise him and worship him must feel like the ultimate sign of control. Plus, them saying all these nice things is a fun little ego boost I’d imagine.

Also add in the fact that Jamil himself tends to use flattery and stuff quite often when he wants something from other characters (he’s even been called out on it), so Jamil might sometimes be distrustful when people praise him (projecting much)

I think Jamil doesn’t just want praise for praise’s sake, I think Jamil wants also praise as a way to feel control. This doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want praise for praise’s sake at all of course, he’s still got quite the ego he needs to feed, and he still likes praise and recognition quite a bit I think, just not as much as you’d think at first glance. Im sorry if I’m not explaining it well, but my thoughts are hard to put into words!

——

I’m sorry if this ramble is all over the place, but I love sharing my thoughts on Jamil! Remember, my interpretations are just my interpretations, and it’s just my thoughts! If you disagree with me, that’s completely fine! Thank you for the question anon, and sorry for making the answer so long <3

[gothicflowers]

Call Of Duty x GN!Reader

How they would react to you telling them about your anxiety disorder.

Warnings: talks of Generalized Anxiety Disorder. This is inspired by my own struggles as a diagnosed individual with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Please do not self diagnose or glamorize mental disorders or illnesses.

Sitting down for lunch after this mornings long meeting felt like heaven. A much needed battery recharging time for you. Taking a moment to practice your positive affirmations and breathing like your therapist said you felt the anxiety simmer down. Only to be interrupted by a tray being placed on your small two person table.

“You’re kinda quiet and shy. It’s actually kinda nice being around someone that doesn’t feel the need to be the loudest voice in the room.” He nonchalantly hands you an electrolyte drink and takes a seat across from you before continuing his rambling. You look back down at your half eaten sandwich diverted your eyes from his. Eye contact is a struggle you’ve been working on. Still listening to his words you nod your head so he doesn’t think you’re ignoring him.

“I mean we all have to know how to be assertive in this line of work, but I can really appreciate your demeanor as a person. You have a calming energy about you.”

You laughed at his description of you and couldn’t help the words from spilling out. “Thanks, it’s actually just a disorder.” You let out a faint laugh. You always tried to find the humor in your situation.

He was too stunned to speak or finish putting his sandwich in his mouth. He put it back down on his plate before trying to find the right words. He was worried his words had came across as rude and disrespectful. All of which he was trying to avoid.

After realizing your blurted out confession you took a brief moment to compose yourself and your thoughts. Looking up at him you gave a faint smile trying to show you’re not upset. “I have what’s called Generalized Anxiety Disorder. People with the condition can struggle with different things.” Trying to describe your struggles isn’t something you’re great at but maybe he’ll understand? “Personally, I don’t do well in social situations, interactions or speaking up. It sometimes leads to anxiety, stress, overthinking and panic attacks if it’s real bad. I prefer to be hidden in the background away from everyone’s attention. I know my comfort zones and when to push myself. But it’s never affected by ability as a soldier.” You nod your head at your own explanation.

He smiles and nods. “I appreciate you telling me that so I understand you better. I do apologize if me saying your shy or quiet came across rude. I genuinely find you to be a great person to be around.”

“Actually you probably went about it in possibly the kindest way I’ve ever experienced. I’ve been told my quietness is rude or snobbish. Which is far from how I want to be perceived. So I actually appreciate someone taking a liking to it.”

It was nice being able to have a conversation about your disorder without feelings judging. Nor did he offer unsolicited advice. Instead he recognized that it was something you don’t openly share and appreciated your trust in him. And his opinion of you didn’t change. After feeling closed off from your team you felt a little more comfortable, with him at least.

Alex Keller, Rudy (Roldofo) Parra, Gaz (Kyle) Garrick, Roach, John Price, Nikolai, Logan Walker

[the-s1lly-corner]

i have a cute request to make

the tadc gang with a shy and introvert child reader

basically reader is very shy and barely speaks, and when needs to talk they just whisper, kinda like fluttershy!

reader hates loud noises so they barely goes to an IHA with the gang, only if they are bored or someone asks them to go, reader just likes being alone for the silence

but, reader does some cute things for the cast, they make little presents, everytime that the gang is in the IHA, reader is busy in their room making little presents, like paper flowers and stuff and leaves at the gang's doorstep, with cute little messages, like: "ur so cool!" "ur doing so well!" before running back to their room.

Caine, Jax, Pomni x shy!sweet!child!reader who hates loud noises (platonic)

i hope you dont mind me running this through the wheel to select characters </3 i still dont take full cast posts/nm i think imma answer this then maybe write an extra post or two (idk we'll see after i write this one); then thats probably it for today, since i think imma work on more art again.. not really behind on my personal goals anymore, just have some ideas that i want to at least sketch so i have that done

CAINE:

would try to make the IHAs a little more quiet and calm but with caines energy and his thought process of "it needs to be stimulating so the circus members dont lose it to the monotony"... sometimes he slips. i was going to say he descends into the adventure waving around a red card making all the IHA-stuff freeze as a joke... but i can genuinely see him doing that. most of the time watches over the IHA now that you're here. you're like his lil kid!! tries to be a dad, falls into common dad stereotypes because thats all he really knows.. though he himself can be a little loud and all over the place... and perhaps even overbearing every now and then... WILL show off whatever notes and gifts you leave for him to everyone else. will make a wall in the common room to hang up your art so everyone can see it

POMNI:

i wouldnt say pomni is shy, but i do think overall she is an anxious person and in introvert... of which is more prominent due to being in the circus (you know, a place thats stressing her out) so it lets you two relate.. and it kind of makes pomni pull herself together for you.. so in a way youre kind of her reasoning to keep going no matter how many times she fails to find the exit; as grim as it sounds. keeps all your gifts and notes in her room on display because unlike SOME people shes not all the concerned with her image or how shes perceived (jax). will try to take you away from a place if theres some noise, usually this is either the common room where everyone else is hanging out at or during IHAs... probably lets you crash in one of your rooms until you feel better. i think she would probably get someone to get you something (like a toy or snack) while she keeps an eye on you

JAX:

i think he would subtly try to get you to stand up for yourself before being blunt that you need to start speaking up. he WAS going to say something about how hes not going to always be there to talk for you buuuuut in the digital circus theres some.. not good implications with that statement, at least a little more than the irl version. less of a parent figure and more of an older brother one.. does keep your notes, though hes not going to tell anyone and hes going to deny it if anyone ever brings it up. hes an asshole but hes not heartless. tries to limit his pranks that can make loud noises, will also play it off to others that he just doesnt feel like doing those pranks anymore. but everyone knows, you know?

[mrs-g0th1ka]

Dear Reader (Zodiac addition)

✮⋆˙ Hellooo!!! My cute little🦇 bats🦇 ~ I want to try something new. I will be giving a message to each sign that I think best suits them. This will all be in light fun, let's get into it ✮⋆˙

Please remember: What I say may or may NOT apply. Please take what resonates and leave what does not. Thank you♡

࿓࿓༄༄࿓࿓༄༄࿓࿓༄༄࿓࿓༄༄࿓࿓༄༄࿓࿓࿓

Air Signsᯓ★

Libra ⚖

Dear Libras, you have a heart of gold. Sometimes, it gets in your way of growing simply because you see the greater good in most situations. It's okay to let go of what you've outgrown, people, places, and emotions. It's not selfish to think about YOU. At the end of the day, you still matter.

Gemini 𐦍

Dear Gems, you simply are gems. You are so insightful and smart that your minds are constantly on the go. You have big thoughts, and you love to share them. Sadly, this will have people trying to shut you down or out. Stay away from those people. Lean closer to the people who like to teach as well. Be teachable, Gemini. You love to be teachers, but you struggle with being the student (at times).

Aquarius ≈

Dear Aquas, people are going to judge us no matter what. We will always be seen as the black sheep, the weird one, the nerdy one, the socially awkward one, the rebellious one, the cold one, the shy one, the bossy one, the emotionally distant one, Etc. The point is that we are simply all of those things in one body, and that's okay. Being different is okay. Don't be so hard on yourself when others can't see the same vision you see. Just put your actions in motion.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆟

Water signs ⋆｡𖦹°‧🫧

Cancer ☽

Dear cancers, Please remember that happiness is not a magical destination. You can arrive and end. No emotion exists in one solid place, and no person can stay in the same position forever. With that being said, you mustn't give up hope. You shouldn't stop reaching for joy, but if it leaves, don't convince yourself that it's due to your actions. Life is fickle - you can't change that.

Pisces 𓆛

Dear Pisces, Life is too short to wait around for the right moment. Let now be the time when you jump into new projects headfirst. This is the time to start a hobby or fresh routine and attempt confidence in your work and home life. There are plenty of opportunities for happiness awaiting you. All you have to do is reach out and grab them.

Scorpio ☠︎︎

Dear Scorpios, there's no need to rush. You will have time to do everything you want to do, and if you try to fast forward through the mundane, it will only lead to mistakes. It's a tired phrase, but "Quality over quantity" is something to keep in mind. Focus on each to -do list with patience and care. I promise it won't be like this forever.

♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨♨

Fire Signs ☄

Leo 𓃬

Dear Leos, the world outside of your windows and walls have been calling to you. It's easy to get caught up in the non -tangible- digital media and relationships and ghost that haunt your subconscious. But there's a natural reset button only steps away. Try to spend more time in nature, and employ your senses and breath in this planet. Your problems will grow smaller in its wake.

Sagittarius જ⁀➴

Dear Sagittarius, You don't need to worry about how others perceive you. It is only the people you choose to cherish that really matter. Your attention tends to linger on the negative. This will result in little room for your heart to bloom. You will be happier and more content if you stop looking for the approval of strangers and begin nurturing compassion for your loved ones.

Aries 𓄃

Dear Aries, When people give you advice, please listen. I know this is a weird piece of advice to receive —"Listen to advice"— but we both know you often disregard others' thoughts when you feel you know better. Hear what your loved ones have to say when you seek them out to vent. They just might have the solution you need.

𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.

Earth Signs°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Capricorn 𓃶

Dear Capricorn, Alone time is more valuable than you realize. Lately, you've found yourself buried in a lot of social activities. You'll be required to put energy into pleasing others, leaving less room for your own self. Make a point to prioritize yourself, even when you're tired and especially when it's hard. Otherwise, you'd be headed towards burnout.

Taurus 𓃾

Dear Taurus, though I know you love the light of a good fire, it's time to stop burning bridges every time things fall apart. You never know when you'll need to reignite a relationship, that professional, personal, or otherwise. Taurus, it's possible to forgive and let go quietly. Your default reaction to interpersonal strife shouldn't be to cut people off completely. You can't live like that.

Virgo ❀

Dear virgos, you must be clear and concise with the people in your life. If you have any issues that need adressing, make sure to state them as clearly as possible . Misunderstanding is inevitable; meanings often become confused in the maze of language,but now more than ever, you must be direct if you want to avoid negative ramifications.

Thank you so much for reading my zodiac yap session!!! This was so fun to do and I hope you guys really enjoyed it, until next time -Gothica♡

[kreideroses]

albedo hcs

i don't normally post on tumblr but it's his birthday and i love him sm 😭 this is just how i perceive him and maybe i'm biased because i'm a simp LOL

🕯️tags: gn!reader, established relationship (reader and albedo are dating), implied thoughts of parenthood on albedo's part, this is really self indulgent, a fuck ton of fluff LOL

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

- albedo is a busy man, so it's a real privelege whenever he makes time in his hectic schedule for the both of you.

- albedo likes listening to your heartbeat when cuddling. he's not human so things like being able to hear your heartbeats, feeling the rising of your chest as you breathe fascinates him

- speaking of cuddling, he gets clingy and very touchy but only to people he trusts.

- albedo loves to hold your hand when he's writing paperwork. he links his arm with yours when you guys walk around mondstadt. very clingy especially around you

- draws you A LOT. this is a common trope in fics of him but i love it okay. he loves studying every detail about you. he works hard to make sure that his depictions of you capture your likeness.

- he's also very open about the drawing thing. like, you saw him sketching you out in his sketchbook one time and when he saw you were flattered he just went "i have entire sketchbooks filled with drawings of you, you know?" and didn't elaborate further until you pressed him on about it. absolutely shameless smh

- he's not really a petnames guy, his reasoning being he loves saying your name, it just rolls of the tongue perfectly for him, he doesn't really see a need for petnames. he does however make an exception for the petname "dear"

- when he holds your hand, sometimes he squeezes it three times out of nowhere. it's his way of saying "i love you" quietly. ever since you learned of this habit from him, he always waits expectantly for you to return those three hand squeezes

- he's the embodiment of "actions speak louder than words". he's still quite shy with saying he loves you, so he tries to make up for it by doing small things such as remembering something you like and getting you something related to your interest, clearing his schedule to spend time with you, or constantly holding or touching you.

- you, albedo, and klee have occassional "playdates" (which is mostly just you two trying to make sure klee doesnt blow up the knights' headquarters)

- during one of your "playdates" with klee, she asked to play house with the both of you and assigned you two to be her parents. albedo could Not meet your eyes for the rest of the day after your roles had been given

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

sorry if this is messy i never post T-T

if this is ooc i apologize to my king albedo it's been a while since i've done my daily albedo wiki page reading :(

[picopepin]

Heyoooo

I was doing my au scribbles and a random thought just popped up in my head 'bout ur 198x bois

As far as I get it, Neo and Ex had some squabbles before eventually getting in some sorta relationship. Sooo, is there anything they dislike/disliked in each other then and now? What are these things?

gehhh.. Imma sorry for the yap, I just got curious 'bout them

They still sometimes fuss haha they're a little less glamorized as a couple to me than like... ubetella for instance. It's two very intense personalities and levels of wit - Ex is a LOT of ego and acts with hubris and because of this he can say/do things that come across kind of mean or instigating. He likes to be perceived as brilliant and thinks nothing wrong of himself sometimes (see: the core storyline within the au) until he gets called out on it at which point he tends to sulk and overanalyze until he figures out he's a meathead. Communication is where the two sometimes fail horribly and thats where tidbits about Neo's shortcomings can come into play-

Neo is actually not nearly as showoffy as Ex but he's not shy and he's definitely not lacking confidence he just doesn't like to talk about his feelings. He really really really doesn't like to discuss his feelings lol. The little mood heart on his bellybutton area is usually covered up but he's tepidly responsive to having it convey something vaguely resembling his current state? Like... he doesn't want everyone to see it but when it comes to Ex he feels better letting that color/light do the talking so that he doesn't have to use his words- if that makes sense!

Things that they "fight" about again come down to that communication struggle and one takes it too seriously and the other doesn't take it seriously enough until it's a humongous mess. A messed up afternoon plans can turn into a two day cold shoulder event or it can explode into something else LOL Locker room jabs and silliness can go over well and then sometimes be really hurtful if one of them is feeling insecure and neither of them are exceptionally good at comfort they just kinda find value in the little things or actually just being quiet around the other (that whole being next to someone who is upset but they dont want hugs or words just another living body nearby)

Hope that helps a bit! Sorry for taking so long to answer ive had a lot on my plate

Edit: to be more specific about "dislike" we can start with the fact that they were literally trying to kill each other at the point in the au where they gotta rescue Frisk! ("Ex is hard to trust but Alphys is like I forgive you, here is a gold star for being good.. (nervous but optimistic)" -Ghost) So not everyone is like "aw yeah I totally trust this guy now" and that includes Neo. Ex is loud and annoying, Neo very much vocalizes how he would hotbox the car and stab his leather seats and you have absolutely no idea how serious that threat is lol. It's a small one, but taking up space, noise, etc when they first start rooming together prolly had a little to do with it. After they started getting more comfortable it pretty much transitioned into those buried insecurities coming back to the surface now and then

[stellari-s]

Hi! Hope you’re doing well :)

Ithaqua x fem! S/o

I feel like it probably takes him a lot to be willing to take his mask off, so it takes him a while but he eventually takes it off when he’s with his s/o alone. Definitely fluffy 🤭💕

🩵

hi, anon! good lord, i'm really sorry for taking so long on this. i know it's very belated, but they say better late than never 🥹 also, i normally do gn readers... if you wanna interpret them as fem then go ahead though!

request; yes yes, by anon! requests are closed for now (inbox is open to chat with me). i got to catch up on my backlog...

wc; 821.

tags; gn! reader, default! ithaqua, ithaqua x reader, fluff, comfort, established relationship.

summary; seldom do you see ithaqua with his mask off: you know he's not shy, but something deeper - you only wish for him to feel comfortable around you.

out in the garden, the flowers that swayed to the breeze’s whims provided color within the dark night solely illuminated by the crescent moon above and the stars that flickered in its faint glory. there were two people sitting next to each other on the swing, close enough so their hands touched on the seat, as they both kicked their feet in the air gently to move the swing in a lackadaisical, rhythmic motion.

“did you know?” you said, breaking the silence, “in some cultures, when a couple gets married, the bride hides her face until she is alone with the groom.”

“really?” the other replied.

while his tone could be perceived as curt to others, you knew this was the way he sometimes sounded when he was getting a bit tired or didn’t want to actively engage in the conversation, instead opting to listen passively.

“mhm,” you replied, “i mean, i dunno, doesn’t that sound romantic, itha?”

itha stifled a laugh. “yeah, sure, except you sound like you’re trying to target me with that?”

you shook your head.

“no,” you replied, “i just...”

before you could continue, itha leaned in closer to you: “do you... want to see my face?”

he sounded like a lost child trying to find his way back home. though you couldn’t see his expression, the small waver in his voice shot through your heart with a pang that refused to ebb.

how could you respond?

“...only if you feel comfortable.”

despite itha being your partner for a good amount of time - perhaps a few months, though time grew to be a more foreign concept the more of it you spent here in the manor - you really never could recall a time with him where he took off his mask. even the times he would kiss you, he only took off the lower half of his mask, where you could catch a glimpse of his somewhat pale skin.

you also didn’t know much about him before he came to the manor: his past seemed to be a sensitive subject for him, so he never talked about it, nor have you brought it up.

you’ve just come to know he wasn’t shy about his own face - he simply disliked it.

“only if...” you paused for a moment before continuing: “only if you take my words for the truth. only if you trust me.”

itha laughed. “okay, okay, i get it.”

his tone was slightly teasing; you couldn’t stop your cheeks from warming up. it seemed ever since you two made it official, you seemed to notice a lot more little things about him.

“sorry, i really didn’t mean to force you.”

“when did i say that?” he tilted his head. “if i was uncomfortable, i would have said it a long time ago.”

that’s true...

“it's not that i really mind,” itha started, “but... i guess i feel like there’s really nothing special about my face? i’m not really sure why anyone would like it.”

you shook your head. “it’s not about how special your face is. but i want to share our moments together with you to the fullest... i want to share our happiness together.”

itha seemed to think about it for a moment before he slowly lifted his hand. his fingers weren’t trembling, but his motions were slow and deliberate nonetheless. he held his mask and removed it, revealing slightly pale skin that reminded you of the moon, light blue eyes like waters in a painting, and the soft lips you always enjoyed giving kisses to.

his expression seemed nervous, seemingly wanting to avert his eyes, and his cheeks appeared a bit rosy too.

“are you uncomfortable?” you asked, placing your hand on the other’s shoulder.

“no, just not used to it.” itha played with a lock of his hair, twirling it between his index finger: a small habit of his, you noticed, when nervous. “but if it’s with you, i figured it would be fine...”

you chuckled before adjusting your position so one hand was over itha's and the other cupped his cheek.

“i love you for everything, itha,” you said, “if you don’t like your own face, i will love it enough for the both of us... until you grow to love yourself more, you can lean on me. take my words for the truth: i think you are very beautiful - your face, your heart, your soul. everything.”

sharing your oath of love once more, you sealed it with a kiss.

when you two parted, itha gave you a boyish smile before putting on his mask again.

“in light of what you said before, since we're together,” he said, his index finger over where his lips were beneath his mask, “what my face looks like will be a secret between the two of us.”

you nodded in response.

“yes, one just for the two of us.”

[solarmagickstar]

I've been hearing a lot of "gen alpha can't read cause they're iPad kids."

But like are we asking them what they *can* do?

Or how *they're* feeling even?

I distinctly remember adults when I was a kid saying we'd all be "brain dead" because of tv or texting or the Internet or some shit. And we couldn't defend ourselves cause we were literally children.

It's like this every time.

And every time each generation has to prove they're worthy of adulthood.

And this gen isn't even all in middle school yet and y'all are calling them failures right in front of their faces. It's not ganna help. If anything it'll make this much much worse.

I'm a Gen Z (well I'm in the transitional area between millennial and Z but most millennials tell me I'm gen z so fine.) I have gen alpha kids. And a lot of them (classmates and the like) are anxious asf about the world.

I wonder if they're putting up a tough front to keep the only control they have in the world as children.

Or living free before they have to become the overworked adults they see in their lives.

Or ya know death by school shootings if they're in America.

Or idk die from a once in a century plague cause their parents won't let them get vaccinated.

Or maybe it's something we could never describe or understand since we're not in that position.

Honestly every commentator I've seen on this topic hasn't asked a child how they literally feel. Like you don't have to put them on camera obviously (maybe don't actually for their safety) but like just ask? Or find ways to ask, kids can be shy about their true feelings sometimes. Especially if we keep pretending like we know them.

Teachers are over worked, parents are over worked. But haven't they always been? (Maybe we should actually do something about that? Like a lot have already been saying, but like actually do it? Maybe baby sit your friend's kid or go to the grocery store with them to help chaperone them? And try and do it for them for free, I get it if you can't but those who can should. I'm also not saying your should steal baby supplies, I'd never say that, I'd also never say to just steal food and hand them out, or to steal teaching and school supplies and just give em away or anything of course not! And I wish I could put the proper tone marks on this but for legal purposes I am being sarcastic.)

And doesn't each generation come with more problems or perceived problems because that's life? We're always going to find something wrong with the younger generation, we're constantly evolving and we're constantly looking for ways how.

Last thing.

What is intelligence?

Is it *really* being able to read?

Is it *really* scoring high on tests for studies?

Didn't we *just* talk about how standardised tests are wild and are often not very good at displaying what kids can actually do? Or are often hard to grade because of lack of staffing? Something something Pearson? Something something my history text book was older than me something something "Bill Clinton the president everyone is looking forward to!" Written on the back page Something something coming home to see late night TV making jokes about his shitty behaviour but making it more about the person who was literally harmed by this and making fun of her well into the 2000s..... (Oh has our education system and environment for kids always been kinda shitty? No way almost like it's a never ending battle.)

Have we truly figured out if the kids are alright?

Have they ever been?

Do we even know what that fucking means????

[stoopid-turtle]

made-up mbti types for dd and gg

So the GQ event that dd attended recently (you know, the one with the love hat) was supposedly gonna share his MBTI type with us. I don't think they ever did, probably because dd just didn't do the test thing. I'm not surprised we never got to see his mbti type, but I did have my own guess as to what he'd score, so I figured I'd share here.

(As a note, MBTI is pretty much junk science but it's fun. Just don't take it too seriously. I used to be really into it in a fannish sense and it's the closest I get to woo-stuff. If you don't know what MBTI is, here have fun.)

Cut to the chase: I'd guess dd is ISFP. My reasoning below the cut.

Introvert - The best way I've found to describe the difference is that introverts recharge by being alone. That is, a weekend full of social engagements is something they need some alone-time after. For an extrovert, social events, themselves, recharge them. Being alone is what's exhausting and what they try to avoid.

DD's probably rarely fully alone, given his busy schedule and the life of a celebrity. But introverts have ways to introverting, even among a bunch of people. I think sometimes people conflate "introvert" to mean "shy", but they're not the same. I don't think dd is particularly shy. It's just all about where your energy comes from.

Sensing - This one is about how you process information.

As an illustration, my bff and I were on a road trip once. She's the type who liked to literally pull over a smell the freaking flowers. And she could name every single flower/plant/tree she came across. Her eye for detail and ability to describe things with precision is always boggling to me, because to me, the most I can say is something like "It was sunny and the trees are green". Very vague. All about the overall impression rather than the details.

In MBTI terms, my bff would be Sensing while I'm Intuition (this is the N. Just go with it). Intuition folks are thought of as the big picture, abstract thinkers while Sensing is about the details and about the Facts of the World.

I mentioned before that dd strikes me as a pretty literal thinker, and that type of thinking overlaps with Sensing more than Intuition.

Feeling - People get confused by this one. It's not about whether the person expresses emotions or anything like that. It's about decision-making. When making a choice, does this person weigh the pros and cons? Try to come to a reasonable and sound decision? Or do they go by gut, following their emotions like animes tell them to?

This is hard to assess because we don't know much about how dd goes about making the decisions he makes. We don't know what went into his decision to go into idol training, say, or why he put his hat in the ring for The Untamed.

I'm making a guess that he's more driven by emotion than thinking. This isn't to say he acts blindly without any thought or that he never makes rational decisions, but he weighs his feelings highly. He'll pursue a gay romantic relationship with another celebrity, despite the risks, because he's in love and, you know, he follows his heart. His decision to submit his headshot for The Untamed, especially, strikes me as being Feeling-driven. Given his career at the time, acting in a BL adaptation was off the beaten path and risky. He lost fans because of it.

I think both gg and dd make a feelings-based decision to drop candies for turtles. There's no rational business case to do so. It's simply because they value having a group of fans who recognize them as a couple and they want to keep those fans with them.

Perceiving - This one's about how you plan or organize your time (or don't).

Judgers are the type to have a planner with a set schedule a routine. They have trouble adapting when their schedule gets disrupted. Perceivers are more go with the flow, able to take things as they come. When taking vacays, they would rather not have a packed itinerary bc they want the freedom to go where the moment takes them.

This is also something I don't feel I have a lot of insight on. DD's schedule is heavily managed and heavily packed, and he spends most of his time diligently following along with that schedule. That's part of his job, though. On his own, would he be inclined to keep to a schedule? I kinda don't think so.

I'm just going based on his...um...general chaotic energy. That and his tendency to do his KPI social media posts all at the last minute. Classic Perceiver move.

***

So, ISFP. In truth, each of these traits is a spectrum and people show examples all along the different traits at different times (for instance, dd's decision-making in SDC is typically strategic rather than based on feelings). Most things are based on context. But this feels right to me, overall.

For gg, I haven't watched near as much of him as I have of dd, but a guess would be INFJ.

Feel free to share your own ideas. Or squee about the love hat. Whatever. 🐢🐢🐢

[donnerpartyofone]

I bailed on a party over the weekend because the parties in that particular series tend to be kind of overwhelming and the last time my husband and I were at one some creepy guy grabbed me in a really intimate full-body way and got kind of hurt about it when I reacted with stunned confusion, and even though I don't think he meant personal harm and basically "nothing bad happened", it gave me this feeling of trepidation about the next party and I decided I needed a slightly longer break from that whole crowd. In the meantime I made it clear to my husband that in the future I might just leave on my own when I start to get overwhelmed so people don't have to watch my aura change and wonder what the fuck my problem is while I wait until things wind down naturally.

Anyway the incident above is exceptional because that guy was really not acting right, but in general: When you have a thing where you strongly do not wish to be touched, and especially if you are at the same time a woman, people will give you all kinds of idealistic, impractical advice about how you Must stand up for your self in a spirit of radical honesty at all times, to exercise your all-important modern bodily sovereignty, and it's like...yeah but life is not an after school special where everybody learns a big lesson and changes for the better in the space of two or three lines of dialog. And like people who say this kind of thing--well, I often suspect that they don't really live the way they're telling me I should live, it's just some aspirational fantasy they have about how life SHOULD be, but to that point I think they're not really considering the tax of constantly, righteously asserting your needs with all kinds of people, especially in more casual and/or public situations. Like yes in a perfect world I would bring the law down on anyone who threatens to ignorantly violate my comfort, but the reality is that most people just do not understand specifically the touching thing at all, and trying to explain myself to people who are not going to get it in situations that don't really matter is just a lot more trouble than it's worth. I have had supposedly-close loved ones make fun of me for it, or passive-aggressively declare that they're respecting my boundaries while making it really clear that they're hurt by my perceived rejection of them, or even just act like I secretly DO really want a bunch of big ol' mushy hugs and my whole "don't touch me" thing is just my secret way of begging for the physical contact that I'm too shy to ask for directly. And when it's a question of dealing with someone I do NOT know, and who I may not even want to get to know, there can be political factors in play, or safety issues, or just the plain old desire for expedience. A lot of the time it's genuinely better to just eat shit and accept the hug knowing that this, too, shall pass.

I recently witnessed a helpful example of this problem that had nothing to do with sex. If you've spent any amount of time with macho tough guys then you probably know that they're incredibly thin-skinned--not just that they're easily angered, but they're extremely sensitive to rejection and criticism. Sometimes I meet one of these tough guys and while I think I'm being totally friendly and normal, they manage to react to everything I say as if I'm secretly judging them and they have to somehow communicate that they know I don't really like them or something. It's funny how that tough guy stuff means the opposite of what it expresses, like how saying "I don't give a fuck" is the clearest possible way to let people know that you most certainly give a fuck and in fact you are giving one right now.

So I was at the classy neighborhood whiskey bar for the birthday of a friend who has had his party there every year for like a decade or something, and the owner is one of these guys. I like him actually, he's smart and funny and has interesting things to say, but he's always indicating that he thinks I'm avoiding him or rolling my eyes at him or something, like he's going to catch me in the act of secretly not liking him. So at this party, which was really an intimate gathering of close-knit pals who have been coming to the bar for years, there was another big macho tough guy, and he refused to shake hands with the owner. There was a good reason that he explained very clearly up front; I can't remember exactly but it was something very rational like his kids were sick, or he was trying not to catch a cold before traveling to see older relatives, that kind of thing--but the bar owner just got so uncomfortable about it, it was really awkward and the two tough guys were like not OK with each other for the rest of the night. And you can imagine that if there were a harder-to-understand reason like a person just does not enjoy physical contact with other people and says "No thanks I do not prefer this", it might have been really not-worth the political problem of creating a bad atmosphere at an intimate birthday party just to avoid five seconds of discomfort. I mean if you're always happy to confront and instruct people under all circumstances, god bless you, but things are not always as black and white as all that for everybody else.

[nxturefairy]

FLORA PARRA - - - - - *.⊹₊‧

“i don't think the planet is really dead. it just needs help.”

GENERAL –

full name:  flora parra.

age:  twenty-five.

gender:  cis female.

species:  fairy of nature.

eye color:  brown.

hair color: dark brown.

height: five feet, five inches.

date of birth:  march first .

occupation:  florist & yoga instructor.

positive traits: compassionate. gentle. nurturing. diligent. sweet. kind.

negative traits: nervous. sensitive. shy. insecure. naive.

HEADCANONS –

The Winx are everything to Flora. She credits so much of how far she’s grown to them and can’t believe how lucky she is to have such incredible friends. The brunette has a tendency to succumb to her insecurities (both with her abilities and in everyday life.) It holds her back from realizing her full potential, so she really appreciates the Winx being there to lift her up and boost her self-esteem. If you ask Flora, she’ll tell you they’re a family. And, like families do, the group argues every once in a while. Flora is very non-confrontational when it comes to her friends. Whenever there’s a tiff, she struggles to express herself because she doesn’t want to start a fight. She is a peacekeeper at her core. And because of that, Flora almost always ends up in the middle. She’s just very good at seeing both sides!

As a nature fairy, Flora is kind of a flower herself. At least, that’s how she perceives herself. She relies on nature to show her the right path. Being as sensitive as she is to plants and living things, Flora empathizes with them on very deep level that many may not understand. She can tell when they’re in distress, if they’re over or under-watered, when they need repotting or new soil… the list goes on and on. Their mood and energy even affects her directly. The abuse/destruction of nature is physically and mentally taxing to Flora; and the girl does not do well in places with an absence of nature. At all. 

Peace, tranquility and compassion are three of Flora’s core values. It’s not uncommon for her to get a little overwhelmed in places/situations where they’re disturbed. She’ll share her meditations and yoga practices with anyone who’s interested and she absolutely adores helping people. Almost to a fault.She might not notice when she’s being taken advantage of because she’s so happy and eager to lend a hand.

Flora battles with a strong sense of justice, but also a strong desire and natural connection to harmony. She tries her absolute best to achieve both when some sort of creature gets loose or trouble arises. Don’t get her wrong, she won’t turn away mischief to avenge her friends as long as no one gets hurt. If you happen to cross a Winx, don’t be surprised to find a particularly troublesome breed of blossom filling your bedroom with wild vines and a ghastly smell.

The fairy can be a bit of a pushover sometimes. Especially when it comes to people she cares about. At Alfea, Flora typically was the one who wanted to follow the rules if something went awry. She lovesss learning and takes pride in being a good student (no matter how often Stella calls her a nerd for it.) Her friends however… well, they usually wanted to investigate whatever trouble occurred. Needless to say, Flora was convinced easily enough to follow along with them.

Flora positively adores art and poetry, and the fairy is a huge romantic at heart. Whenever she has a crush, a sort of calm panic overcomes her as she overthinks/reads into absolutely everything. Their energy. What they did and didn’t do. The poor girl gets so tongue tied that she can barely even get a word out. It’s not uncommon for Flora to coerce one of her more forward friends to talk to the person for her and get some intel on how they’re feeling.

Her mother was pretty controlling. Didn’t like her going off to Alfea. She was very passive aggressive and emotionally demanding. Flora loves her home, and she loves her family, but she wants to be a flower in her own garden, not someone else’s.

Holds her yoga sessions outside whenever possible. Most times she won’t even use a mat when she does as she’d rather take the time to ground herself on the grass.

One of those people who, when she tidies up, things get twice as messy before they actually get clean.

Cottage core AF. Very patient, hopeful, and encouraging.

Took ballet classes growing up because she thought it looked so beautiful and graceful. Then she realized how aggressive and demanding it could actually be. She still likes to do it, but just for fun. 

Extremely protective of her friends and her younger sister, Miele.

Nervous giggles. Fidgets with whatever’s closest to her. Her hair, fingers, jewelry, a straw. Especially when she’s daydreaming. She’s a big, big daydreamer.

Doodles leaves, vines and flowers a lot.