#and then it’s so hard to go from my home situation to work like i ripped my parents from each other last night and couldn’t sleep tile 5 am
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punkkture · 1 day ago
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how i view simon riley
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for a second, let’s just forget everything about him that actually is true and let me lie . . .
simon riley is 6’5” and is chubby with hella muscle underneath. hes got a lot of tattoos covering his arms and hands, and one on his torso thats battered with scars. i like to think he has dark brown hair, its just my type okay? his eyelashes are sooo long and his hands are always washed, he hates having dirty hands.
simon is a good leader, he kind of has to be. he is an amazing man when it comes to his job and his teammates, but when he gets home, thats the only chance he has to just let go. there isnt some persona he has to put on when hes home. his temper gets the best of him sometimes and hes lwk toxic asf.
“baby c’mon you know i didnt mean to, ‘m sorry” — “dont be dumb sweetie you know im busy right now, go somewhere else and leave me alone” — “stop acting like this, im tired of you right now”
but he will always come to bed with you. always kiss you goodnight. always fixes the covers back over you when he gets up in the morning. its not his fault that he just has some anger issues he never got over when he was a kid. simon is either a big teddy bear or a stone wall. hes hard to read on most days but his tone will always give it away. mf has an awful tone problem when hes having a bad day. simon’s words are often harsh when hes having a bad day but his physical nature says the complete opposite.
“just shut up baby, you sound so stupid” he’d groan at you, but at the same time he’d pull you closer into him, kneading your soft skin in his hands gently. as if he is always apologizing after every mean phrase that comes out from those parted lips. and when that hurt whine comes from your lips hes already ‘shh’-ing you and rubbing your side.
my simon riley is infatuated with his sweetheart being all dolled up and dumbed down. he loves himself a stupid dumb girl that just cant do anything by herself. of course he knows hes needed for work, but simon has never felt needed outside of his job title. even if he’d never admit it without some emotional talks, he could cry over the fact that you need him. that something as precious and pure as you needs a man as rough and battered as him. he knows deep down youre not a stupid girl, youre bright and just curious, as he likes to put it. he loves being able to explain simple things to you, loves that you call him because you forget how to turn the oven fan off and how to cut a mango. hes so thankful that hes not needed for life or death situations with you like he constantly is for work.
my simon riley is obsessed with the idea of getting you pregnant. he is a sucker for breeding. when hes left alone in thought he always, without a doubt, thinks about you having his babies and forever being in his life. he just knows you’d be such a good mom. you are the only person he can even picture caring for his own. your sweet and kind nature on the daily shows how maternal you are and it just makes that soft spot in his heart swell and get bigger every time he pictures it. hes also smitten with your waist line. oh god dont even get the man started on your back dimples and the curves of your hips. simon’s lips are always on your abdomen and tummy.
“gonna have my babies in here one day sweetie, youre gonna look so pretty all knocked up” he mumbles in between warm open-mouth kisses right under your belly button. his heavy fingers digging into the dips of your back as he pulls you inexplicably closer to him.
he really is such a sensitive man under all that scar tissue and bulky muscle. in my head simon is an april taurus sun, pisces moon, and rising gemini. so basically, the taurus in him showcases he has a very rough exterior that is great at displaying leadership and grounding skills, but the pisces on the inside makes him sensitive and he has a lot of emotions, then the gemini in him makes him come across as independent and deceitful at first. i could go on forever about this mans astrology chart.
simon riley who always brags about you to his friends. he’s very careful with talking about you at work though. he would most definitely set the world on fire if anything bad happened to his sweet angel girl. when he’s back from deployment, out at some shitty pub with johnny . . he can’t keep his lips sealed about you.
“i know ‘m gonna marry that girl. i know it, gonna give her my last name and at least four kids . . you wanna know what she made for dinner when i got home from the last deployment?” he rambles to poor soap who just wanted to get out of his apartment.
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torturedlexdepartment · 3 days ago
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Church
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Rafe Cameron x fem reader
Author's note: I remember I wrote this for @sugarcoatedstarkey a few years ago 🙈 can't believe we forgot about this one 😵‍💫🫠 wish Rafe would take ME to church 🙃
Warnings: SMUT, reader is Ward's personal assistant, oral (fem and male receiving), sex in the workplace
Summary: sparks fly when you and Rafe stay after hours in the office to work on a project
You had worked at Cameron Development for over six months. You worked as Ward Cameron’s personal assistant. His son, Rafe also worked closely alongside you. You guys spent a lot of time together. He was very sweet to you and it seemed like he was being flirty sometimes. But you didn’t want to just assume the boss’s son was hitting on you, so you never pursued anything.
It was a Friday afternoon and Ward had sent everyone else home early. He instructed Rafe and you to stay behind and finish up a very important business proposal. You were a little excited to hear it because you had never been left completely alone in the building with just Rafe. You guys worked quickly and things were almost done. You just needed to get everything printed off and ready to present.
“I’m gonna go wait on all this stuff to print.” You let him know and he nodded as you headed to the copy room. You were standing over the printer waiting patiently for it to be done. It was an older machine and took forever to do anything. You didn’t understand why the office didn’t buy a new one. You knew the Cameron’s were loaded. You popped your head up quickly when you heard Rafe come into the room.
“You’re gonna hate me but I accidentally printed everything out of order.” You jokingly groaned at him. You knew that meant that you guys were going to have to shuffle through the huge stack of papers erupting from the printer and put it all back together the right way. Rafe started grabbing what was complete and laid it out on the table behind you.
You went back and forth between helping him scramble things back together and grabbing stuff as it came off the machine. You accidentally bumped into him a couple of times as you were both trying to go as fast as possible so you could go home for the weekend. You guys laughed and brushed it off until your hand grazed his when you both went to grab the same page. You saw something change in his eyes.
He quickly reached out to grab your face and bring you in for a kiss. You could feel the neediness in the kiss, you could sense that he wanted to do this for a long time. His lips were soft and you were intoxicated with the smell of his cologne. You pulled away for a second, questioning the situation.
“Rafe..” You looked up at him with a concerned look on your face. “Your dad will fire me.” He laughed and closed the gap in between you.
“What my dad doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” He smirked and you smiled as he reattached his lips back to yours. His hands immediately went to cup your ass, rolling your hips into him earning a whine from you. You had dreamed of this countless times but now that it was actually happening, it was like fireworks were going off in your mind. He gripped the back of your hair tightly as he swiped his tongue across your bottom lip, begging for access. You let him have it.
After a while of teasing each other with your tongues, you let your hand trail down the front of his body until it met the hem of his pants. Your hand started dancing around the outline of his cock through his pants and he bit your lip when you finally made contact with it. He was hard as a rock already and you were highly pleased with yourself. You pulled away from his kiss and slid down until you were on your knees.
“I’ve thought about this a lot.” You said to him as you undid his buttons and slowly slid his pants down until his cock slapped up to his stomach. Holy shit, you thought to yourself. He looked down smirking at your reaction, you were definitely fueling his already huge ego. He was huge. This was going to be a challenge but you were up for it.
“Me too Y/N, I’ve wanted to-” He gasped the second your tongue made contact with his head. You swirled it around the tip to tease him before hollowing out your cheeks, taking him all the way in your mouth. “My fucking god.” He used his hands to grip all of your hair, making sure it was out of your way as you went to work on him. You traced every vein on his cock as you bobbed your head up and down. It was almost too much for you to take when you felt him hit the back of your throat but you powered through. The sounds he was making made you soak your panties. You always got off on pleasing others. “I’m gonna cum.” He groaned as you felt him twitch in your mouth. And then his spurts of hot wet cum spilled straight down your throat. You sucked him dry before releasing him from the grips of your mouth.
He reached down quickly pulling you back up before picking you up and setting you on the printer, which was still working. He kissed you once before moving his attention to your neck. The fire between your legs burning hotter and hotter.
“Rafe, just fuck me already.” His hand went up under your skirt to grab your underwear and start tearing them down your legs.
“Absolutely not baby girl. Not before I return the favor.” You sighed heavily as he slid down your body and pushed your legs apart. You benched your impatience when you felt his hot breath over your aching pussy. You almost fell off the printer when he sucked on your clit. He used both of his hands to steady you where you were sitting while he ate you like you were his favorite dessert. Your hands tugged at his hair as you felt your orgasm bubbling in your lower stomach.
“It feels so good Rafe, don’t stop.” He moaned into your pussy and flicked your clit even faster, not something you thought was even possible. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you let yourself release, your slick coating his beautiful face. Your whole body was vibrating as you came down from your high. His tongue finally left your heat and he left tender kisses on the inside of your thighs before coming back up to face you.
You pulled him by his collar to kiss him deeply. The sweet taste of yourself still very prominent on his lips. He broke away from the kiss, pulled you off the machine, and spun you around so that you were facing it. He pulled your skirt up out of the way just enough so he had access. He wrapped his left hand around your throat as he pulled you into his chest. He used his free hand to shove himself inside of you. You both moaned simultaneously.
He started thrusting into you at a slow pace at first, his hand still tightening around your throat as you begged for more. He placed a kiss on the side of your head before moving his hand and shoving your body down onto the printer. He gripped your hair as he started pounding into you harder.
“Fuck you’re so tight baby, I’m not gonna last.” He groaned out as he slid in and out of you with ease. He was stretching you out so good, this was so much better than all the fantasies you played out in your head about him. The tip of his cock had found that special part inside of you that had you a whimpering mess underneath him. You gripped the sides of the printer like your life depended on it.
You two hadn’t even noticed that in the chaos of you fucking, you knocked all the freshly printed papers on the ground. A mess you would have to deal with later. You started to feel yourself clench around him and he started to slow down, trying to savor the moment. He was close too, his thrusts were becoming sloppy.
“Rafe, fuck I’m gonna cum.”
“It’s okay baby, I’m right behind you.” He thrusted into you a couple more times before you were pulsating around him, causing him to shoot his cum deep inside of you. He leaned over you for a few moments, trying to catch his breath.
“Fuck Y/N, why haven’t we done this sooner?” He pulled himself out of you, pulling his pants back up before finding your panties for you.
“Because I was waiting for you to make a move.” You turned to face him with a cheeky grin.
“Well next time I won’t keep you waiting beautiful.” He leaned down, kissing you gently.
“Next time?” You asked.
“I mean if you want to. I personally can’t wait to fuck you in every square inch of this office.” He winked at you and you playfully shoved him away.
“We’ll see Cameron.” You teased as you both went to work cleaning up the mess all over the floor.
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ginnsbaker · 1 day ago
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All Of Your Pieces (3 - The Neighbor)
Chapter Summary: Agnes sees the perfect opportunity to stir up some trouble while Wanda deals with her jealousy toward your work assistant, Geraldine. Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female Reader Chapter word count: 2.8k+ | Chapter Tags/Warnings: None
A/N: I really have nothing to say except that I enjoyed writing Agatha in this chapter // More author's notes here.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
The team has been at a standstill, figuring out who’s behind this, or how to communicate with anyone trapped inside the town. Every drone they've sent in morphs into something entirely different, thwarting their efforts to gather any useful intel. The people sent underground to scout a safe route through have gone dark, their communication cut off. No one else volunteered to attempt approaching the perimeter after that.
The broadcasts they've been tracking are erratic, cutting out for hours with no warning, making it hard to keep a consistent eye on the town's odd behaviors. But it's during one of these quiet periods when something clicks in Darcy's mind.
“I think I have something,” Darcy blurts out to Jimmy. They’ve been scraping the bottom of the barrel, running out of faces to identify from the snippets of life in Westview they caught on screen. 
“Yeah?” Jimmy gives her a tired look, only half-listening. He can't remember the last time he managed more than an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Even if he could find the time to rest, the bizarre situation they're in won't let his mind relax. 
Darcy sighs and leads him outside the tent.
“So, you’ve seen that radio on Wanda’s kitchen counter, right?”
Jimmy only nods.
Darcy continues, “The next time she’s washing dishes, or whatever—which by my count—happens about once an episode, barf, we’ll shoot a signal to that little guy.” She leads him to a set of computers set up behind a pickup truck. Jimmy doesn’t understand what’s going on with these systems, but he’s hoping Darcy really is onto something.
“This transmitter will mimic the frequency of the broadcast,” she pauses to catch her breath in the cold and to give him time to catch up with her science. “And if my theory is right, it will allow us to speak to her.”
She cuts off any chance for Jimmy to comment and assures him, “This is definitely going to work.”
The annual Westview Harvest Festival is in full swing. The town square is packed with booths overflowing with baked goods and fresh fall produce. A small stage is set up for the local band playing tunes from the 70s, while kids dart around in all directions, their faces painted with fanciful designs. Billy and Tommy are with their preschool teachers, who are keeping them and other children their age occupied with arts and crafts that involve tumbleweeds—a material no one seems to think is entirely safe for five-year-olds to play with.
In hindsight, it’s the ideal setting for introductions and mingling. However, everyone here already knows each other—everyone, that is, except for Wanda. She makes an effort to blend in, but apart from a few interactions with the planning committee, which weren’t particularly fruitful, she often remains secluded at home. This makes you, the only one in the household who heads out daily for work, the more socially connected of the two. It’s both amusing and slightly anxiety-inducing to watch you interact with the townsfolk who are essentially strangers to you and to Wanda, if only you knew. You and Wanda never had the opportunity to live a normal life, to settle in a typical city, surrounded by neighbors who could have become integral to the life you might have built together. 
Seeing you interact with these people, she’s realizing it’s harder than she thought to share you with others. Or maybe she’s just as selfish as she’s always been, never really outgrowing it. When you were both part of the Avengers, it was like living in a bubble, surrounded by only a few familiar faces every day. Now, outside that controlled environment, it’s challenging her expectations and stirring up feelings she thought she had under control.
It becomes particularly tough when she sees Geraldine heading towards you, sporting that perpetual, dazzling smile full of perfect white teeth. Wanda's fingers curl into a fist, tiny wisps of red energy leaking from them. You quickly cover her hand with yours, and the effect is immediate—she relaxes slightly, letting you intertwine your fingers with hers, anchoring herself by your side where she feels secure.
“It's so nice to see you outside of the office, just being one of us for a change,” Geraldine says, though she seems to be wearing the same uniform as at work. Not that you're judging, but it does make you wonder why she hasn't changed.
“Definitely beats being stuck behind a desk,” you reply, your attention briefly wandering. Only then do you notice that Wanda has subtly withdrawn her hand from yours, now exploring a booth with homemade apple cider. You hadn't even noticed the exact moment she let go.
“Hello, Wanda!” Geraldine greets her warmly. 
Wanda musters a tight-lipped smile that’s convincing enough, as Geraldine appears quite taken with it. Just then, Geraldine spots Agnes standing a little away from the crowd, lingering behind Wanda with a look that borders on suspicion or disdain. 
Geraldine steps up to her while Wanda continues to busy herself with whatever else is being showcased in the booth. “Hi, I'm Geraldine. Isn’t this a wonderful evening?” She extends her hand to Agnes.
Agnes eyes the offered hand but doesn’t accept it. Instead, she sizes up Geraldine with a quick once-over and nods, foregoing any introductions. Geraldine's smile falters briefly, but she quickly shakes off the slight, tossing a brisk, “See you around, Y/N!” over her shoulder as she heads back to her table.
You wave back and let out a sigh, relieved that you’ve just sidestepped what could have been the most awkward moment of your life. Wanda’s jealousy towards Geraldine seems more serious than you’d realized. You know Wanda can be possessive; it's just been a long time since it's manifested this way. But then, it's also been a while since you've both been in a crowd of strangers like this. Since…
Since when, exactly?
“Y/N, honey?” Wanda’s voice snaps you out of your fog.
You blink. “Hm?”
“I’m thirsty.”
Just like that, you’ve forgotten about your lapse of memory, replaced by a desire to tend to your wife's needs.
“I’ll get us some refreshments. What would you like?” you ask.
“Just some water, please.”
“Water here, too,” Agnes calls out, unsolicited. 
You suppress the urge to roll your eyes. It's great that Wanda's making friends in the neighborhood, but did it really have to be Agnes O’Connor? Ever since you and Wanda moved into this quiet suburb, Agnes has made it her personal mission to be involved in every aspect of your lives. You can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to it than the apparent nosiness of your neighbor.
As you head over to get the drinks, Agnes sidles up to Wanda, her eyes gleaming with an opportunity to stir some pot. 
“Geraldine seems quite taken with your wife.”
It’s not like Wanda doesn’t know what Agnes’s doing, but she finds herself nodding in agreement anyway. Your new assistant does appear smitten with you, and while Wanda gets the appeal—you are, undeniably, crush-worthy—she can't say she's thrilled about it.
“Y/N is her boss,” Wanda murmurs, more to herself than to Agnes.
“Oh, honey,” Agnes laughs condescendingly. “Do you even go to the movies? That's how the steamiest affairs start, you know.”
Wanda bristles at the sound of that endearment from someone other than you. But she keeps herself together—barely. 
“I trust her,” Wanda forces out.
As you're getting drinks, Geraldine joins you, picking up a soda herself. She lets out a light laugh at a joke from the bartender, and you find yourself chuckling too, oblivious to the piercing look your wife is drilling into your back.
Meanwhile, Agnes sees her opening and swoops in, linking her arm through Wanda's with a bit more force than necessary. 
“Of course, you trust her, dear,” she murmurs right by Wanda's ear. “But do you trust her?” She points subtly with her chin towards Geraldine, her lips pursed. “You know what they say, keep your friends close, and your enemies closer…”
Wanda's shoulders tense, her entire frame stiffening. As you return with the drinks, Agnes steps away, leaving Wanda visibly shaken, like she’s teetering on the edge of a panic attack.
“Everything okay?” you ask, handing her a drink. You've noticed before how Wanda's demeanor changes around Agnes; she’s clearly a source of stress for her. It’s going to be a difficult conversation, but it might be time to tell Wanda what you really think about the neighbor.
Wanda takes the water you offer, her fingers trembling slightly as she does. For a moment, she appears distant, disengaged, as if her mind is elsewhere. Then, with a sudden shift, she flashes you one of those smiles that sends a shiver down your spine.
“I'm fine,” she declares, a little too brightly. Then, seemingly out of the blue, she asks, “Is Geraldine here with someone?”
You stop short, realizing you really don't know much about Geraldine beyond work. “I didn’t see her with anyone,” you say.
Wanda nods thoughtfully. Her next suggestion catches you by surprise. 
“Maybe you should invite her over to our table.”
Did you hear that correctly? Had Wanda just done a complete 180 regarding your assistant and was now interested in getting to know her? You shoot a suspicious glance at Agnes. Had she said something to Wanda to change her mind?
“Are you sure?” you ask, puzzled by her abrupt change of heart.
“I am,” Wanda affirms. “It might be nice to make a new friend.”
Back at the response camp, Darcy and Jimmy are huddled around the small, grainy television, waiting for the moment Wanda’s in her kitchen so they can send a message through her radio device. However, the usual domestic scenes are conspicuously absent, replaced by static and sporadic cuts to the ongoing Harvest Festival.
“Come on, come on,” Darcy mutters under her breath, shoving her glasses back up her nose. They've been slipping a lot lately, probably because she's been hunching over her work more than usual these past few days.
“It's this festival,” Jimmy says, squinting at the screen. “I think the whole town's out there tonight. I don’t think we’re going to get the chance.”
Their attempts to contact anyone inside the Hex are dwindling, and Hayward's interest leans more towards studying the energy barrier encasing the town rather than resolving the anomaly itself. His latest directive to launch another drone into the barrier feels like a brute force attempt to crack the problem. Jimmy thinks it’s a waste of time—and resources.
“Yeah, and you know what’s worse?” Darcy grumbles. “I have a bad feeling about Agnes. Every time she's around, things just seem to... escalate.”
As they watch, the screen cuts to a shot of Agnes at the festival, linking arms with Wanda, whispering something that makes Wanda’s expression tighten. “See, what did I tell you?” Darcy exclaims, pointing at the screen. “Who’s this Agnes again in real life?” she asks.
Jimmy swivels in his chair, his gaze sweeping across the expansive pinboard filled with photos of Westview residents. Agnes’s face is not among them. 
“No idea,” he says flatly. He had already run a search in the database, but it came back empty.
“So, we've identified Y/N, Monica, and Agnes as outsiders in Westview,” Darcy explains, tallying them off on her fingers. 
“That’s correct,” Jimmy confirms.
“And then there’s Wanda’s sons. But again… we haven’t seen any other children in the show besides the twins.”
Jimmy thinks about it for a while. It had never really occurred to him before. “Maybe they’re bound to show up at some point?”
“Smells fishy to me,” Darcy huffs. Her thoughts circle back to Agnes. “How do you think Agnes ended up here?” she asks, their list of unanswered questions growing daily.
Jimmy shrugs. “She could’ve just been visiting.”
Darcy considers it. It's a possibility, but somehow, it doesn't feel quite right—too simple, too convenient for someone as vibrant and prickly as the character Agnes portrays.
It's as if Wanda's animosity toward Geraldine just magically went away. 
They’ve been chatting for almost an hour. Initially, Wanda made sure to include you in the conversation, but as time passed, she and Geraldine started connecting over topics that didn’t involve you as much. Feeling somewhat left out but also at ease that the problem between your wife and your secretary has apparently resolved itself, you decide to check out the festival booths.
This is where Agnes finds the perfect opportunity to get you alone. She starts her approach—to your surprise and discomfort—by acknowledging the elephant in the room.
“I know you don’t like me very much,” she says with a knowing smile. “Maybe we can change that tonight?”
You eye her with suspicion, easily seeing through her blatant attempts to flirt her way into your good graces.
“How exactly are we going to do that?” you ask, crossing your arms in front of you.
Agnes simply laughs off the cool reception you’ve given her. If anything, she revels in it. 
“By getting to know each other, obviously,” she says.
“Right.”
She takes your elbow, and you swear she can feel you recoil at her closeness, yet she doesn’t seem to care. She urges you forward, dictating the pace. Her grip is unexpectedly firm, as if to say you have no choice but to listen—like leaving isn't an option.
With you literally in her grasp, Agnes sets her plans into motion. “So, how did you and Wanda meet?” she asks.
You deliver the narrative precisely as it plays out in your memory, exactly as Wanda implanted it in your mind. “We grew up next to each other. Best friends since we were kids.” 
“How cute,” she says, in that smooth, supercilious tone that usually makes your skin crawl. But this time, with the memories of Wanda filling your head, you hardly notice.
“Yeah, I remember when I first saw her,” you continue, gazing into the distance as if the scene you speak of is right there before your eyes. “It was almost Halloween, and my mom had baked a pumpkin pie to welcome them to the neighborhood. She sent me to deliver it. Wanda answered the door.”
“Love at first sight?”
“More like the opposite,” you say, throwing Agnes a good-natured smile, something you’ve never done before. “She couldn’t stand me, and I felt the same way.”
“Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?” Agnes drawls before accompanying it with a short chuckle. “Who knows? Maybe there’s hope for us yet. You might end up not hating me so much after all.”
“Maybe…” you say, the smile reaching your eyes this time.
“Good, good,” Agnes says. “I can’t think of anything more romantic than growing up with the person you’ll be with for the rest of your life. Almost like it’s… sketched out, no?”
You nod at her, not sure where she’s going with this, but you appreciate the sentiment. You consider yourself lucky to have known Wanda most of your life. 
“So, you've lived in Westview your whole life?” Agnes asks.
“Yes,” you nod without hesitation.
“And you've only ever been to Westview?”
“No, of course not,” you laugh, ready to list off places you've been, but suddenly, you can't name any. The cities and trips that should come easily to your tongue just... don't materialize.
Not a single one.
Agnes watches you struggle with a blank expression. A second later, she begins throwing out suggestions, as if trying to help. 
“Canada?" 
You shake your head. 
“California?” 
Another shake.
“New York?”
No. This time, your eyes sting with the frustration of trying to pull something from the haze, realizing there’s nothing there. 
Have you really never been anywhere but Westview?
“Eastview, maybe?” she offers with a bit of sarcasm as she names the town next door.
“I—”
“How strange,” Agnes muses, driving home the final nail in the coffin of your crumbling peace.
You jerk your arm away from her grip and take a few instinctive steps back. “I need to pick up the twins,” you blurt out, seizing the first excuse that comes to mind. “We should be heading out soon.”
Without waiting for her reply, you start walking away, driven by a sudden, intense need to be with your boys, with Wanda. To hold them close, to find some stability. Because right now, you’re petrified by a fear you cannot name. 
“I heard Australia’s amazing this time of year!” Agnes calls after you.
The idea of not having been anywhere but Westview—it’s possible, right? Some people spend their entire lives in one place. But if this feeling—the one that's been gnawing at you lately—is real, if the world outside of Westview is truly non-existent, then what does that say about your life here?
What does it say about you?
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just-dreaming-marvel · 19 hours ago
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Apologies ~ Love That Burns
LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST / EVERYDAY MOMENTS MASTERLIST
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Word Count: 1,440ish
Summary: After living alone together for less than a year, you and Logan fight.
Notes: I know that CUDDLES had the most votes for next, but this was ready first. This fic goes with my series, Love That Burns! Please give it a read!
Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks! 
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Logan and you had been living at your old house for less than a year. Your relationship was getting better, but the rough patches were still rough. Lately, Logan had been working eighty-hour work weeks. When he came home, he would smoke a cigar and drink before turning in for the night. Logan was moody with you and barely helped around the house. It was frustrating as Logan had promised when you arrived, only to work part-time and that the duties around the house were for both of you to complete. Your frustration caused you to be moody as well, not helping with the situation.
It was late in the evening, and you were putting away a cold dinner that had been waiting for Logan as he arrived home. The tension was thick in the air. Logan’s boots were loud against the wood floor as he came into the kitchen and grabbed one of his cigars from off of the counter.
“I made dinner,” you grumbled as you closed the fridge. 
“Not hungry,” Logan huffed, placing the cigar between his lips. “Do you mind?” He motioned to the cigar.
You scoffed. “Actually, I do. Feel free to light the damn cigar yourself and take it outside. I’m going to bed.”
“What’s got you in a mood?”
“Are you serious?”
“I just don't think that I need to be snapped out for asking for a simple favor. I have been working overtime, and I just thought you could do something for me.”
“Do something for you? All I ever do is stuff for you! I make dinner every night, only for you not to come home in time or even eat it. Do you even eat?”
“I do, at the bar.”
“Alcohol isn’t food, Logan.”
“It seems to do the job just fine.”
“Logan… I… I miss you. You’re gone more than you're here. And when you're here, it's like you're still somewhere else.”
“The lumberyard is short-staffed. I have to work.”
“Yes, but you could still come back home to me instead of stopping by the bar. You go to the bar, and I stay up waiting for you with a wasted dinner. When you come back, you're tired and distant. You either go to bed before me or long after me. We barely talk anymore—“
“I’m trying here, sweetheart. This,” he motioned around the room, “is new for me. The not running, the not fighting is hard.”
“So, are you regretting coming here?”
"That's not what I said.”
“But it’s what you're feeling, isn’t it? This is all too much… I’m too much.”
“Now, wait a second; I never mentioned anything about you.”
“That's part of the problem. We came here to work on our communication, but you're shutting me out!”
“You knew that communication wasn't easy for me when we got into this. You can't expect me to change overnight.”
“I know that, but I thought that we were getting better. That we…"
“That we what? That we were going back to the way it was before, the first time we lived in this house? We've changed---I've changed. You can’t compare the two.”
“I'm not!”
“The pressure you are continually putting on me sure feels like you are.”
“I’m not trying to, but any pressure on you, Logan. If that’s how you're feeling, you need to be honest about it.”
Logan scoffed. “It’s not that easy.”
“It can be. If you come home and be home."
“What do you want me to do? Quit?”
“I’m not asking you to quit. You just need to find a balance.”
“I need to find a balance? Maybe what I need is different than you think.”
“Then tell me!” Your hands went up in flames at the frustration of this roundabout conversation. You quickly stepped back and stopped the flames. The tension in the air was thicker than it ever had been. “I... I’m going on a walk.”
“It’s too late for a walk."
“I’ll be fine.”
“Y/N—“
“Logan, let me go before we say something we both regret. I won’t be long. Just need to clear my head.”
Before Logan could argue more, you slipped out the back door and headed towards the trees. Logan remained still in the kitchen, his mind replaying the past few weeks and the argument that had just occurred. You were right, he had been distant and working more hours than he should. He was scared. In all honestly, Logan was enjoying the simplicity of life. But it was something that could be taken away at any moment. He couldn't allow himself to enjoy it more so he buried himself in work and alcohol, not ever considering the effect it would have on you.
~~~
You knew that Logan was scared to open up and enjoy life. You were scared, too. Your lives had continually been changed, ripping away your happiness. But you couldn’t let that stop you from enjoying life. You need to hold on to the good while you can, and not worry about the future.
You were so caught up in your own thoughts, that you lost track of time and where you were. It was still dark outside and even your flames couldn't help guide you in the correct direction. You knew that Logan was probably concerned and would begin searching for you. At least, you hoped. Finding a small clearing, you put together a pile of wood and lit it on fire. You sat against a nearby tree, hoping that Logan would find you.
~~~
Logan had practically paced a large path in the kitchen as he waited for you to return. It was past midnight now, with no word from you. It was growing concerned. What if you got injured? What if someone took you? What if you were dead? All of his worst fears came crushing through his mind, making him grow more concerned and more guilt-ridden. 
Logan went out the back, eyes searching through the darkness to see any sign of you. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose. His heart clenched as the familiar smoke smell struck his senses. Logan’s eyes snapped open and caught sight of the smoke rising above the tree line. Thankfully, his legs moved before his mind could fully comprehend. All he could think about was that there was a possibility of something wrong with you. Well, more wrong than the fight you two had. He wouldn’t forgive himself if something happened to you.
“Y/N!” Logan yelled as he sprinted through the forest. “Y/N!”
When he broke into the clearing where the fire was, Logan stumbled to a stop. His eyes frantically searched for you, finally catching a glimpse of your feet on the other side of the fire. He rushed over and knelt beside your curled-up form. His hands roamed you for injuries.
“Y/N, honey,” he pleaded as he continued to search you for injuries.
“L—Logan?” You said groggily as you began to wake.
He breathed a little sigh of relief as you responded. “Come on, sweetheart. It’s time to come home.” With ease, he picked you up. You killed the fire as your arms wrapped around his neck.
“I knew you would find me,” you mumbled as you let Logan carry you home.
“Always, sweetheart.” Logan carried you all the way to bed and held you close as the two of you settled in.
“Logan? I—“
He quickly shushed you. “We’ll talk in the morning. Let me hold you. Sleep.”
“Okay… love you.”
He kissed your head. “Love you more.”
~~~
You were tucked into Logan's chest when you woke. He was already awake, not wanting to lose you from his grip.
“Morning,” you looked up at him.
“Morning,” he leaned down and kissed your head.
“We need to talk."
“I know… I’m sorry… For everything. I’m not meaning to be distant. I’m still figuring this whole thing out. How to just work and come home and be the man you need me to be… I’m sorry."
“I know. I'm sorry, too. I know that I need to be more patient.”
"I'm going to tell the lumberyard I can only work part-time like originally agreed upon. I’m going to be home for dinners and to help you around the house.”
“Logan, I just need more communication. If you're not going to be home, I need to know.”
“I’ll work on it. I promise.” He pulled you up to have better access to your face. “I love you so much, sweetheart. Thanks for sticking with me.”
“You’re stuck with me, Howlett, no matter what.”
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pixeltwix · 24 hours ago
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-Unrelated McGucket Ramblings
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Because my mental illness is metal illnessing my brain has been having a wonderful time combining interests. Specifically gravity falls and the Odyssey of all things?
The parallels between Fiddleford, Emma May, and Tate -& Odysseus, Penelope, and Telemachus is driving me bonkers. EVERYTIME I hear songs like ‘There Are Other Ways’, ‘I’m Just A Man’, and ‘Love in Paradise’ I can so vividly see Fiddleford so ardently longing for home, for his wife, for his son, but something or some event keeps pulling him back every single time he has a mind to just go home. I can’t help but let my head make the connections and rewire silly lyrics to fit closer together than I already feel they are.
‘Back at home my wife awaits for me, she’s my everything, my Emma May. And she’s all my power, all my power, but it’s been (x) long years. Oh (x) long years since I have seen my wife, and now the god of (chaos) is out to end my life-“
Additionally while I do not see Emma May as Calypso to any degree, her few lines in ‘Love in Paradise’ stuck out so hard to me if it was outside of the context of Calypso & Odysseus’s no good very bad situation. Just the-
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“It will be fine dear, come back inside dear, love of my life come back to paradise. I know your life’s been hard, I’ll stay inside your heart. I love you my dear, I love our time here, life would be so much worse if you had died. Please stay away from harm, stay in my open arms.”
Is SO POST FIRST PORTAL TESTING FIDDLEFORD CODED- when Emma May finally comes up for herself to check on him in Gravity Falls and sees his condition. I refuse to believe for a moment that she didn’t at least try to understand what was going on before fearing for her and her sons life. Finding her husband most likely stumbling around like he doesn’t even know himself or where he is, trying to soothe and bring him back to her. And at first it seems like it’s working, like he’s slowly piecing together what she’s putting down, but then he’s sparking, spiraling again. She tries a final time to coax him from whatever whirl of madness he’s gotten himself into, but it never gets better. In fact it keeps getting worse. But just the vISUAL ALONE of her with that part of the song trying to bring him away from harm all the while he’s still deeply haunted with the ‘all I hear are screams’. AHHH-
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Additionally the narrative of Penelope stalling her suitors for YEARS because she’s hoping, praying, that her husband is still alive, still out there somewhere. That maybe just maybe he’ll come home. I am screAMING and pointing at the Emma May core of it all. I’ve been meaning to develop elderly FiddEm dynamic be it platonic for the sake of recovery, but my biggest thing with her design is despite after all these years she sTILL carries aspects of her husband with her. Be it wearing his old specs he left at home or still keeping her floral motif with her brooch. She still loves him deep down- she always will, and she’s always gonna mourn the life that could’ve been if Bill hadn’t been involved, but still. Keeping him as apart of her even if she ‘hated’ him for so long kept her going.
Also idk plus just the-
‘Hell no, I could kill you where you stand. I’m no pet, I’m a married man.’
Is silly to me because I know it would be very ooc for Fiddleford to have THAT much bite even if he is capable of ‘lashing out’. Regardless it’s still amusing brain movie content to envision-
If I didn’t already have so many other ideas on hand I’d draw this all myself, but raaaaa so many other concepts I wanna draw first :(
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yowumi · 2 days ago
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Hotshot surgeon Gojo x Medical Student Reader Ft. Hotshot Surgeon Suguru [ modern au ] TW. Pregnancy & Love Triangle
Shotgun Wedding Ch. 03 | Make Up
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Summary. Satoru Gojo, The states #1 Neurosurgeon, known for his wealthy clan. He was known for his success, parties, and his willingness to fuck anybody and everybody in a 10 mile radius. Unfortunately, one unlucky night, you make the wise decision to do what any hard working young medical student would do when faced with a sexy doctor…you sleep with him in which changes your life forever.
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Warnings. Accidental pregnancy, no protection (wrap it before you tap it), love triangle, roommates (they all live together), arranged marriage, satoru is a bit of a meanie, plot twists, angst, smut, you only end up with one.
A/N. this is my first time writing a fanfic, although i’ve always wanted to! i’m always open to take constructive criticism or any tips to make my writing better! I hope you guys enjoy and definitely lemme know if you have any suggestions, read well luv <3
keep up! // ch. 1 // ch. 2 // ch. 3 // ch. 4 (coming soon)
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As the time has passed, things have been going smoothly at home. Satoru has been keeping his promises about controlling the drinking and his whore behavior and there was no drama in the house.
Although, after two months since the pregnancy, you’ve started to notice changes within your appearance as your belly is starting to show. Nobara claims you’ve got the ‘pregnancy glow’ even though, you would disagree as you haven’t fully gotten used to your new body.
[12:07pm] King Nobara: OMG!! we should totally go baby clothes shopping
Nobara’s texts appear in your shared groupchat with you, her and Yuji. Megumi was originally supposed to be in here as well but Nobara bullied him out after teasing him about his shared drunk kiss with Yuji.
[12:07pm] Yuji: can i come toooooo? it’s been so boring lately also it’s been a while since the gang has been together, i need to get fushiguro out the house, i’m afraid he will become emo!!
[12:08pm] King Nobara: he’s already emo :((
You roll your eyes at their teasing, a small smile leaving your lips as you feel comforted talking to them again. Hanging out with all of them again would be good for you, after all it’s been a while since you’ve talked to Megumi who still has refused to talk to you after you’ve moved out.
[12:10pm] You: Yeah, sounds good. How’s 2 sound?
[12:12pm] King Nobara: good for me, you in itadori?
[12:12pm] Yuji: yes Ma’am!!
You set your phone down as you think out your day before getting your thoughts interrupted by the sound of your maid coming in the room in a rush ready to clean up, she apologizes as she thought you would be up by now.
Taking notice of her stressed out behavior as she pants, you ask, “is everything alright? what’s the matter?”
“Well today is a big day, you know” She says offering you a kind smile at your concern for her.
“How so? it’s saturday” You ask, furrowing your eye brows trying to think if you’ve missed a holiday.
“You weren’t informed?! Oh my!! The Gojo’s will be arriving for dinner today so you two can break the news of your pregnancy, I apologize, I assumed Mr. Gojo had made you aware.”
“Oh I see” You nod in understanding as you get up from your place on the bed, matching your way towards the door.
Loud slippers make its way through the hall, passing by the living room in which Suguru sat on the couch sipping his coffee as he flicked through channels. As if he reads your anger, he mutters “uh oh” as he looks towards the situation before him amused as you violently knock on Satoru’s door.
You can hear what sounds like Satoru getting up from his bed followed by a muffled groan as if he is stretching before being approached by a shirtless Satoru in front of you, yawning without shame which seems to set you off.
He looks down and quickly reads your angry expression before a sly smirk appears on his lips, “ah and good morning to you too, baby mama”
“You shouldn’t call her that Satoru, it makes it sound like you knocked her up after a one night stand or something” He sarcastically teases followed up by Satoru grinning in front of you.
“My apologies, Now what do i owe the pleasure of being in the presence of my strong, beautiful, glorious, soon to be mother of my child” he says dramatically.
If you were cartoon characters, you’re sure smoke would be coming out your ears by now.
“Why am i now getting informed that we will be breaking the news to your parents tonight?” You cross your arms annoyed by how calm he is by all this.
“Relax, i just didn’t want to stress you out, not good for the baby.” He says nonchalantly making your blood boil. Not wanting to stress you out? Since when did he care about that. As if his whole existence didn’t stress you out.
“Well now i’m stressed out even more, i can’t even prepare and i have to rush to see if i can get a gift or something!”
“No need, we will have a little dinner at the house and that’s it, no need for gifts, they aren’t that formal” He brushes you off with a scratch to his head.
You stomp away in anger, not feeling the need to further speak with him as you might just strangle him right there.
“Those slippers are super cute on you by the way!” He shouts out playfully before you turn around to throw one at him before he retreats to his room.
You look towards Suguru who is encouraging Satoru to run and retreat before you aim the other slipper towards him causing Suguru to throw his hands up in defeat, “I surrender!”
You let out a small huff as you walk away.
“You’re breakfast is in the microwave!” he shouts out softly laughing as you walk away giving him a thumbs up of acknowledgement.
getting dressed to meet up with your friends ended up more stressful than you intended, feeling a weight in your chest knowing Megumi would be there.
I mean you always knew that he wasn’t the biggest fan of gojo but not talking to you because of it just seemed like a little much to you. you didn’t understand why he cared so much about you and gojo, i mean it was always playful banter, right? Megumi didn’t seriously hate gojo, could he.
either way you knew you would have to find a way to repair the friendship between you and megumi, you valued it a lot considering having growing up with him.
Gojo was always like an older brother figure to Megumi, I think apart of Satoru wanted to relieve the pain of Megumi losing his parents, budging his way into a brotherly role in his life.
When you were kids you would remember the car rides as Satoru would drop you both off at highschool as Satoru would make his way to college.
the nights you spent alone with megumi where you felt safe and loved at a time where you felt alone. In a way it felt like you found a familiar comfort in being with him. growing up with him felt so natural that it made you anxious at the thought of losing him over someone as stupid as Gojo.
Megumi felt like family, the family you never got to have.
after working up the courage to walk out your room, clutching your bag filled with junk and medications gojo prescribed you on.
“where are you heading?” a voice comes out from behind you, almost startling compared to the silence you were surrounded in moments ago.
you turn around to see gojo eying the sundress you’re wearing, helping you cover up the small baby bump that was barely beginning to form.
“I was going to meet up at the mall with some friends”
he nods, “hm okay, i assume megumi will be there as well?” he asks, a hint of concern in his voice.
“mhm” you hum. what was with the sudden interest in Megumi?
“do you mind if i come with? i’ve got some things i need to get from there before my parents come, and it would be nice to see megs ya know” he says, surprising abandoning his playful tone he usually has at the mention of megumi, instead now showing some guilt on his face.
you think for a moment, thinking if bringing Gojo was really the best idea. would megumi really be okay with that? he’s been so silent that it’s hard to read how he will react.
after moments of thinking, you finally nod. giving your approval as a soft smile appears on Satoru’s lips as you both head out the door.
“We’ll be back, Suguru!” Satoru shouts before closing the door.
The car way there was silent once again, you couldn’t quite read the mood between the both of you. Satoru was a big personality in front of people, yet with you, most times he would just stay silent, making you wonder what’s happening in his head. You would try not to overthink it too much.
arriving at the mall you see Nobara and Yuji sitting on the curb frantically waving as you get out the car like fangirls. while Megumi stands quietly by the light pole next to them, a blank expression on his face.
Gojo takes a few seconds before walking out of the car, letting you’re friends greet you with excitement before quietly walking out, closing the door. when he turns Nobara gives you a mouth open look of dramatic surprise as she nods her head in ‘hottie approval’.
You roll your eyes as you hug her tightly and seeing Yuji greet Gojo, “Hey doc! what are you doing here!” he goes in to give him a handshake as Gojo laughs returning a friendly greeting towards Yuji and Nobara.
You look to see megumi who is already facing you, turning away once you make eye contact, you look down feeling a guilt feeling in your stomach, you hated when he was upset with you. but you weren’t going to give up, you would make it your mission to make sure you can make up with Megumi today.
“There’s my little munchkin, hey megs! it’s been a hot minute since you’ve visited, holidays are coming up, come by sometime!” he says pulling Megumi forcefully into a hug as Megumi makes a salty face looking away, “Okay.”
You wave and walk towards him, “Hi” you say giving him a soft smile, Megumi turns his gaze towards you, he wanted to be upset but he knew you were pregnant and he couldn’t help how innocent you looked trying to make an effort to speak to him, “hey” he says back, his eyes softening for a moment as he looks down at your sundress hanging loosely around your body, noticing the small baby bump.
You guys walk around the mall, Gojo and Yuji disappearing off as they talk each others ears off as they wondered off to god knows where in the mall, leaving you, Nobara and Megumi left.
Nobara babbled about the third year medical students and something about how there’s a rumor of third year student Inumaki getting to work along side Nanami Kento as a gynecologist. Meanwhile Megumi stays silent trailing behind you both as he watched you eying the baby clothes.
as she speaks about the subject a voice pops out behind all of you, “Hey first years, what are you guys doing here? doing some last minute shopping?” Maki wraps an arm around Nobara’s shoulder watching Nobara’s eyes light up.
“Yeah, we’re doing some last minute christmas shopping since Yuji decided he would invite his asshole of an uncle over for christmas, we’re totally low on supplies. Oh by the way you guys are still coming right?” Nobara says looking towards you, Maki, Yuta, and Inumaki. They all nod as you stay silent, not knowing where you’re going for thanksgiving, did Satoru even want you there? you would assume he would have plans along with Geto.
“Uh Im not sure actually”
“Aw why nottttt! Gojo and Geto are coming! so is Shoko and Nanami!” She says pulling your arm like a child wanting their mom’s approval.
“They are?” you ask, surprised at the fact.
“Yeah! it’s at Megumi’s apartment so everyone’s meeting up there! you have to come, i won’t accept no!”
you finally nod giving your approval leaving Nobara satisfied.
The next hour at some point Nobara heads off with Maki and the others leaving Megumi alone with you as you walked around stores. A silence filled the void between you two before Megumi surprisingly broke the silence pulling you into a store, “come here”
you’re confused but you follow him into the store in which you soon realizes sells baby clothes and supplies.
you look and run your fingers through the small baby clothes along the racks, imagining ones you would like your baby to wear as he watches you fiddle with the small buttons along the baby coats.
He watches you carefully and silently as you do so, after several minutes finally breaking the silence.
“is it his?” he asks and you turn towards him startled by the question.
you try to play it off as confusion, “w-what?”
“Satoru, it’s his isn’t it. He dropped you off that night of the event, your carrying his child aren’t you?” he keeps his calm demeanor.
you look down, not wanting to answer the question. for moments it’s quiet before he lifts a hand on your shoulder, “it’s okay.”
you look up at him to see his face is filled with an expression you weren’t familiar with on his face, a look you hadn’t seen on him in a long time. A soft smile appears on his face.
You admire the sight, taking advantage of it while it lasts, burning the imagine in your mind.
“y-you aren’t mad…?” you ask turning your head slightly.
he shakes his head, “no. i know you’re smart enough to take care of yourself, I trust that you will.”
he says before taking the palm of his hand and putting it gently on your waist slightly caressing the bump on your stomach. “but if anything doesn’t work out, you can always come back home.”
you smile, in the moment it made you feel nostalgic, reminding you of the comfort you once felt in Megumi’s presence as kid. You’re home.
before leaving the store, Megumi purchased small white mittens and a small black snow hat, for the baby. He holds the bag as he walks with you out of the store finally finding Gojo standing alone at the food court making small talk with an old woman.
“Hey, where did everyone go? don’t tell me they left the old man to fend for himself” you tease as you walk towards him, a grin appearing on his lips.
“don’t tell me i’m getting wrinkles already! but yeah they went and found a bar somewhere across the street but i had to lead by example, you know, as their mentor and all” he brushes his shoulder dramatically finally realizing megumi was beside you. “Oh you’re still here! Oh Megumi you should come home with us, my family is coming in just a few hours, they would love to see you!” he says cheerfully,
Megumi shrugs, “Yeah whatever” He says nonchalantly looking at your eyes for a response,
“sounds like a plan”
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A/N. This chapter is a little short but only because the family dinner with Satoru’s parents is most likely going to be long considering everything i have planned to happen for it. There’s going to be some flashbacks and drama next chapter for sure so I figured this chapter would be more of a calmer setting where reader and Megumi make up and we get some fun scenes.
let me know if you guys would like to be added to the tag list for ‘Shotgun Wedding’ updates!
tags: @jeannieboys @maskedpacific @muimuiwisteria @baileebear
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theflyingfeeling · 6 months ago
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yes it's just me whining about the same thing for the billionth time, pls just scroll past nothing new to see here 👋
#i just want to enjoy the summer but i feel like i don't deserve to if i'm not constantly trying to become employed again 😭#''apply for jobs then? problem solved'' uh-huh yes but!! i also hate applying for jobs#job seeking can be so incredibly humiliating#first i have to send them a letter BEGGING to be invited to an interview#and then i have to try and convince them that i am actually competent and good at my job even though you have my cv right there#and then afterwards they call me to tell me they found someone who they liked better than me#(or rather someone who was more competent than me judging by their work history etc.)#it's like ''yes we are hiring but not YOU specifically lol''#like. at school if you take a test you get the grade you deserve based on how you did in the exam.#it's something you can actually directly affect yourself#but if someone who's applying for the same job with me has more work experience or whatever they will get hired over me no matter what i do#(at least that's how it usually works on my field)#in which case it doesn't matter if i do well in the interview or nah. bc the other person was always going to be picked for the job anyway#and yes one could say i can then be satisfied if i did my best but it's little consolation when i'm still unemployed!!#and so every time i apply for a job and get rejected it feels like a personal failure#and to avoid that feeling of failure i want to avoid applying for jobs altogether#so yeah. being active in job seeking is more likely to relieve me from this misery but job seeking is ALSO misery. so 🤷‍♀️#that on top of the fact i don't even _want_ to apply for all the open positions on my field#but i feel obliged to because it's what i have a degree on. and when i'm unemployed i don't have the luxury to choose which ones i apply fo#i can't afford to be picky#I DON'T DREAM OF LABOUR I JUST NEED MONEY TO LIVE BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO DO JUST ANY JOB! I AM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR THAT!#i don't want to come home crying from work every day because i hate every single aspect of my life INCLUDING my job 😭#when this semester i actually HAD a job i didn't mind waking up to every morning 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#it's not fair it's not fair it's not fair#to conclude i don't deserve to enjoy myself in the summer because i'm not doing enough to fix my unemployement situation#(just like i don't deserve to feel sad about being lonely because i don't work hard enough to maintain deep friendships#but that's a crisis for another day! stay tuned ✌️)
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icewindandboringhorror · 3 months ago
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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...
#AND then they'll be the winning team or whatever and its like... wow... imagine that... I wonder how its possible that they can get#more dishes out faster than the other teams... hrrmm.... lol#Not that they aren't still doing work like. obviously it's still hard and there's still a sales component and other stuff to be done#but It's just kind of unbalanced seeming when one group is serving like grilled shrimp sandwich with 3 homemade sauces and a#slaw and two sides and the other people are like... slicing fruit and drizzling a bottle of hersheys chocolate syrup on top of some thing#they just threw in a waffle maker for a few minutes#You see the footage of the teams cooking and everyone is like prepping a ton of different things and meat and vegetables and they have#boiling pots and pans and fryers going and tossing stuff in bowls and compiling these multi component dishes#and then That One Team is always just casually slicing bananas or doing some whipped cream in a bowl gbjhbhj#They usually dont even make their own caramel or chocolate sauces or anything. Nutella out of a jar babey!#So all you're really Making is like... whipped cream. and some sort of batter (waffle. crepe. etc)#If I got placed in a competition like that and I found out one of my opponents just sold waffles or pancake sticks or etc#like that I would just be like... okay.. I'm out then. bye. OR I would pivot and be like.. right I shall remove all complexity from my menu#whatsoever and just start selling plain balls of fried dough with powdered sugar or plain fries with nothing on them or something lol#update: OH my god.. one of these teams on a newer season is selling a 'bonus add on' where you can add#cinnamon sugar and caramel syrup (possibly not even home made by them???? just from a bottle) for $5 extra on your order#If I bought a $12 waffle from a food truck and they were like 'hey do you want to upgrade? for only $5 we'll drizzle a teaspoon#of caramel and sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on there!' I feel like I would cancel my order and walk away.#that is a $1 add on at MOST.. for a freaking DRIZZLE of caramel sauce LOL#and of course this team is in the top 3... squirrel.... come ON...#Which I know all these shows are fake and bad and whatever. I dont watch them seriously. I think I liked the first few seasons#but then anything past like season 4 (or whenever they started having established people who already ran food trucks on there#instead of taking a bunch of peope who had never run a food truck before and giving them one - which is a much more equal footing#premise to me) I have just been increasingly annoyed at and I really just have the show on for background noise#whilst doing chores or something and am not genuinely paying that much attention but... my god.. At least try to pretend its fair lol#WHICH I KNOWW... you can say 'well the other teams could do similar if they wanted.' or blah blah. tehcnically it's THEIR choice to#make stuff from scratch and not sell a bunch of packaged frozen chicken wings dropped into a fryer over a shitty 6min waffle or etc.#but... I will never respect a $5 for 1tbsp of caramel sauce type of situation.. even if they win.. you will always be losers in my heart#So many teams with real cooking skill & good concepts go home to the 'slap nutella on fried dough' people... how...
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youremyonlyhope · 7 months ago
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why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up
#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director#and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production#and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out#but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again#i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately#so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me#i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me#i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added#and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad#anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much.#but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great#but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else#but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing#and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us#and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing#and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more#especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this.#and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not.#and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING#and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine.#but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad.#because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented#if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that.#but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent.#and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt#i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried.#and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over.#i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help#and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh#brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.
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theindefinitearticle · 6 months ago
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I just want to write a quick love letter to my ADHD medication real quick. I finally got back on my correct ADHD medication and then had, no fucking joke, perhaps the most insane rollercoaster of a fortnight within fucking days of getting back on this prescription. If even half of the things that had happened to me in the past two weeks had happened in like, January (everyone's favourite mental breakdown month), when I was on an absurd alternate concoction invented through "idk, here's a bunch of scripts and just see what happens" pharmacist magic ("just call around. I don't know when it will be back in stock. Just keep calling places. Go up a dose. Go down a dose. Try both at once") because America says Australia isn't allowed any more of my medication 😤 no were being too greedy 😤😤😤
Went back on my correct dose, had the insanest two weeks of my life, and got through it only some problems. And with an ultimately positive view on the week and my performance in it. If this had happened in February you would have had to have me committed. I don't even know to what department but somebody would institutionalise me for something.
ADHD medication I love you 🥰
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bataranqs · 6 months ago
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5 Happy Things
May 24, 2024
hehe it's the 24th and the year is 2024
my digestive system is working great and i can eat food with basically no problems yayyy
did some work today!!
got to help a friend <3
got to study in a cafe!
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deadlydelicious · 1 year ago
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You know how at a certain point interacting with people becomes exhausting
have you ever noticed how some people are just...MORE people than others.
Like at the ed of a long day, interacting with my Dad is fine, he usually just wants to chill out. My Mum is like medium interaction, sometimes too much, but ok if I use the mental energy boost of walking i the door
but my aunt and uncle are staying with us right now and their presence is fucking EXHAUSTING. like no, don't pepper me with questions about my commute at 8:00 in the morning as i'm trying to walk out the door with all my stuff, don't make snide comments about me 'sleeping downstairs' because me making my lunch at 1am woke you up. this is my house?! my home?! why should i be the one having to bend and twist for you? you're the ones who decided to stay here so you won't have to pay for s hotel, any discomfort is your own fucking fault. jesus you're the guest here not me
but god forbid i put up a boundary, then its being rude. totally fine if they trample all over mine though
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lilgynt · 2 years ago
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my work routinely gives me anxiety attacks
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fappellmoan · 2 years ago
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hi lol i wish we were mutuals so we could bitch about the awful girls in our lives together lmao. but also huge kudos to you for keeping your distance from her! 👍🏻
LOL oh no i rlly go thru spurts like thrice a year of actually following people/back but pls feel free if u wanna ramble <3 thank u for the words of encouragement. by keeping my distance i mean. it's not hard bc we rarely talk between classes. but also i was p normal even though she was very :-)) <333 !!!!! during our last classes and i gave her a tiny little present that i very normally considered my like. goodbye. and then let myself get my hopes up cause she responded like :D when r u going home i should be done w finals stuff i'll text u!!! and like. that's not gonna happen <3 but im handling it like a champ. or at least better than i have before. lol
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kaiwry · 11 months ago
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Oh God I'm so bored
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exopelagic · 1 year ago
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fuck R <3
#this is the worst#it just feels like. let’s give this guy a bunch of rlly hard work to do#and put him in a situation completely removed from all his normal coping mechanisms. wouldn’t that be fucked up#like I have no desk! I have no space! my room is my brother’s room and I have to work on my bed while he’s playing fucking fortnite#on a call w his friends with the fucking strip led lights in BLUE-WHITE. and he’s sitting right next to me with a massive fucking moniter#and then downstairs my mum is incapable of shutting up for more than 30 seconds and the dogs won’t ever stop#I love my dogs but oh my god they’re not trained. they fucked up so incredibly insanely badly with both of them they barely tried#and now they wonder why they don’t listen to us.#the best!! the absolute best I ever get is when my parents move the shit they dump in my sisters room when she’s not here somewhere#so I can sit on her bed and work on my own#it always fucking kills my back and I really don’t like having to be in there but honestly?#my own room is even more hostile since my brother took over when I went to uni and has been sloooowly changing stuff. it’s his room.#i told them I wasn’t gonna come home for long this year bc I don’t have the time for it and I should’ve stuck to it#I just let my mum guilt me into coming back this time#but also!!! literally every time we’re on the phone!!! she’s like luuuke I can’t wait until you come home how long til you’re home now#when are you coming back how many weeks has it been now are you coming home soon are you looking forward to coming home hurry up now#I really thought I’d be able to manage it this time but I think this is a new record for hitting a breaking point#I’ve only been back for like 30 hours#i cant fucking deal with this but I have no other choice and I have no fucking clue what I’m meant to do now#I’m. going to try work on the easier code. it’ll be fine.#luke.txt
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