#and then inevitably start drawing again
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
tw // self harm mention + scars
WOOHOOO THEYRE FINALLY DONE!! team rwby are here and real after nearly 23 hours spent on them in total 😵💫
^ versions without the text&arrows
vvv hc transcript + hcs not mentioned vvv:
Ruby
She/they/crescent
5’4
Genderfluid
Butch Lesbian
AuDHD + PTSD
goggles: ‘Goggles to protect remaining eye (+they make crescent look cool as hell)
right eye: ‘Eye scratched out by Cinder’s grimm arm’
green hairband: ‘For Penny :(‘
nose: ‘Shares nose shape, skin tone & freckles with their Dad & Yang’
upper chest: ‘scars on chest from CC’s attempted possession’
chest 1: ‘Yang bought their binder & had it customised for her (+ Blake)’
chest 2: ‘Binds their chest most of the time except from when she’s in Vacuo. Then they borrow trans tape from Blake and bind with that instead’
sash: ‘CR hooks onto the back of sash and sits diagonally across crescent’s back’
shirt and shorts: ‘Stole one of Yang’s goofy shirts & cut his cargos into shorts’
Weiss
She/her
4’11 (5’2 w/ heels)
Transfem lesbian
Asexual
OCD + PTSD
hair: ‘Hair cut shorter & she wears it down more often’
green hair tie: ‘For Penny :,)’
nose: ‘Shares nose shape with her brother + got her beauty mark from her mother who has one in the same place (TO ME!!)’
face: ‘On E’
red bandana: ‘gift from Ruby :)’
right arm: ‘Heavily scarred arms from SH & fighting grimm’
left eye: ‘Blind in this eye’
left shoulder: ‘Wears shawl to protect shoulders from the sun (burns easily)’
right side: ‘Chest scar carries over to her back & she has no feeling in the skin there — the nerves were burned away and caused permanent damage’ then off that ‘Doesn’t cope well in hot climates (Vacuo) too well because of this’
myrtenaster: ‘Has a strict routine she keeps with maintaining Myrtenaster and if she doesn’t do it, it’ll send her into a spiral’
Blake
She/they
5’7
Non-binary bisexual
Autistic + PTSD
ears: ‘Gold jewellery like her mum’s’
right eye: ‘Eyes shine in the dark due to faunus night vision’
left eye: ‘More prominent faunus facial features (slit pupils, fangs, nose, etc.)
hood: ‘Hood has cat ear shaped pockets that unzip so she can choose whether to have her ears out or covered’
chest: ‘wearing trans tape under crop top’
left bicep: ‘Has big, strong arm & shoulder muscles from throwing Yang around with Gambol, but a softer tummy cause she’s healing from all the bad habits they picked up in the WF’
orange scarf: ‘Wears orange scarf to mirror where Yang’s arm ends and where metal begins’
tummy: ‘happy trail and STRETCH MARKS!!!”
shoulder+elbow: ‘More furry like their Dad’
forearm: ‘Scars from WF training, SH & grimm’
waist straps: ‘Yang uses these to pull her in for a kiss all the time :)’
chaps: ‘chaps + cowboy boots = sapphic devastation’
tummy scar: ‘The scar on her hip is the only one that still looks fairly gruesome, and the only one that burns and stings even long after the initial injury is healed. She thinks it’s because technically she was stabbed there twice, even if the second time she managed to use her semblance to get away.’
Yang
She/he
6’0
Butch lesbian
AuDHD + PTSD
nose: ‘Got his nose scar while fighting a jabber walker’
eye: ‘Eyes have specs of crimson in them even when his semblance isn’t active’
ear: ‘Shares skin tone, nose and hair with his dad’
facial hair: ‘On T’
left bicep: wears scarf on left bicep to mirror Blake’
arm,legs,tummy,chest: ‘HAIRY!!! :D’
leg: ‘Heavily scarred from SH, grimm and bar fights’
shorts: ‘Can sew and likes to decorate his trousers/shorts with patches & pins. He also likes to sew things for his team (he’s the reason they all have the team colours somewhere on their outfits)’
chest 1: ‘Scar across chest from Neo’s blade’
chest 2: ‘Got top surgery at some point in Vacuo (he likes to joke around and say that her semblance blew his tits off).
HCS NOT PUT HERE (i forgor):
Ruby:
•takes tips and advice from Yang on how to dress but mainly just throws clothes on and hopes for the best. she hasn’t quite got the hang of things looking… cohesive… yet.
•strong arms from swinging CR around.
Weiss:
•Was quite slender, but began gaining a bit of weight once she got back to Remnant. Starting to heal :,).
Blake:
•has chronic pain that stems from her tummy scar and radiates up her spine. Overworking, stress & the cold cause most flare-ups.
Yang:
•has a collection of goofy shirts (That ruby always steals from).
•has weapons hidden in her prosthetic arm in case he’s ever out of dust or in a bind.
•still experiences phantom pain in his stump and pain from some of the scars he’s acquired over the course of the war.
#bumbleby#yang xiao long#blake belladonna#rwby#pyrrhicpoison#rwby fanart#ruby rose rwby#ruby rose#weiss schnee#headcanons#the bee crumbs i’ve put into their side#hehe#who left those kiss marks on yang’s pecs#and tummy#i guess we’ll never know#🤭🤭#anyway i spent a long time on this#lost a lot of sanity#BUT IT WAS WORTH IT#jumps up and down#okay now time to sleep#and write#and then inevitably start drawing again#gonna put the#hcs#tag again#JUST TO SOLIDIFY#this is just my take on the team
44 notes
·
View notes
Text
every so often i have to relearn how to draw yuuji or he starts fighting me
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#yuji itadori#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuuji#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#i love drawing sukuna as the teeniest tiniest eye on yuuji's face n using it as an excuse 2 use his tag <3 ths his Rent#anyway he fought a bit at first but would u believe it i got yuuji 2 cooperate fr a draws pls clap#maybe it's just when hes in a piece with megumi that he gets an attitude??? whatever th case im happy w all of these thank god#beef w yuuji Settled fr now . until he inevitably decides 2 fight me again sighs#in the meantime !!! had SO much fun drawing his new scars#happy 2 report tht ive fully come around on yuuji 1eye itadori i wasnt sure at first but now i love it fr him#i love the texture of it i love splitting his eyebrow n drawing the scar tissue up Through the remaining hair....#i love him looking like he's winking i love drawing the lil X on his chibi#its GOOD#i dont think ill give him a fake eye very often if at all but it was fun putting him in tokyo ghoul cosplay fr this#o ya speaking of his Accessories the slippers started out as tigers also but then i wanted them bunnies and i saw an opportunity#so now miku is haunting this draws and my yuuji owns a pair of deco27 rabbit hole slippers#now that i rly look at it that whole fit is such a look actually im crying#we got beef shirt...#@ me @ sukuna @ the fact tht yuuji is Jacked#10/10 triple entendre 10/10 would wear
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
was in the mood for some fluff today
#before i inevitably start bullying them again.#goro akechi#sumire yoshizawa#akira kurusu#persona 5 royal#royal trio#shuakesumi#shuake#akesumi#shusumi#cele draws
455 notes
·
View notes
Text
for Fall in Faerun Week 4 - masks/costumes.
jedi astarion 🤭
#my art#bg3#astarion#fall in faerun#baldurs gate 3#star wars#when dova drew sith astarion i knew this was inevitable....eventually#i need to start drawing on bigger canvases again this looks so much nicer than some of my more recent shit
336 notes
·
View notes
Text
a fool and a sinner
#heyy WATCH REVUE STARLIGHT[TRAIN PASSES OVERHEAD] I SAID WATCH REVUE ST [FOGHORN] [SIRENS]#revue starlight#revstar#hikari kagura#kagura hikari#shoujo kageki revue starlight#Girl you're so damn dramatic get your ass up and continue the cycle#STFU AND START ONCE AGAIN BUILDING THE TOWER THAT WILL INEVITABLY FALL 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣#i'm back in my bimonthly revsta haze. Oh my god starry session revival was SOOOOOOOOOO.#i missed seeing kukugumi performing together. And oh my god mayanana sirius. OH MY GODDDDDDD#PRIDE AND ARROGANCE WAS ONLY SUPPODE FTO BE KAORUKO AND THEY WERE LIKE THATS CRAZY CAN WE MAKE TOXIC YURI OUT OF THIS? IKUTERU GET UP THERE#i screamed. all i can say#semester AMOST OVER assignments MANAGEABLE status: ALIVE#pretend i didnt post a drawing of myself coughing uo blood on twitter 24 hours ago. teehee#i need to rewatch gekijouban. Will be a little treatfor me after my last assignment gets handed in#Also theres this rpgmaker game ive been following that finally came out this year and inknow it will give me brain worms im so excited to#play it. ALSO I HAVE AN EMU TO POST I DID AN AGGIE WITH MY CLASSMATE but i gotta clean her up. maybe tonight after homework. amen#its her n cinnamorolllll so cutessss SOOOO CUTES
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
chat if i may speak
#marvel cinematic universe#mcu#xmen#x2 xmen united#xmen the last stand#xmen dofp#magneto#erik lehnsherr#snap sketches#i love the old people !!!!!!#highkey though old people are prob my fave subjects to draw ..#theres just so much line definition- i feel more confident drawing them and saying 'yeah that looks like them'#tho i also feel this way with people/characters who have really defined features and shapes ..... most curious !!!#anyways. i gave him extensions vjalkjlkaejAELJ#long-hair erik is important to me and i simply Had To See with ian mckellens face#at the same time something isnt right ... i cant explain it... im not gonna sit on this any longer tho this just a quick thing vjlkalk#when i inevitably draw older movie erik again ill prob go back to his short hair but i may be subjected to a treat. just this once#i dont wanna drive. totally unrelated. im going home for the weekend and i live so FAR from my dorm i hate it here (no i dont)#i just hate driving VJELAVJAE#whatever its the weekend which means more time for xmen brainrot#i just started S3 of 92 !!!!! in theory im halfway done with the series but S3 is also 26 episodes compared to the previous 13 vjeALVKEJ#OH WELL. im gonna go now i have to start driving at some point i GUESS#i just wanted to leave the people with a silly thing </3 ok bye bye#i have a silly comic planned with younger cherik so heres to hoping i do that !!! it's stupid but funny. i hope#ok bye bye now Truly
301 notes
·
View notes
Text
the artblock be hitteth Harder than normal, for tis not normal artblock. woe. Wally be upon ye
#im still So Inconsistent when scribbling him#he never comes out the same way twice#but then again. do any of us?#anyway i think the Misfortune of the past week finally killed my brain#its a tiny smoking poppy seed resting in the middle of my skull floor#too much all at once. cant art anymore#i keep pulling out my tablet and setting up to draw#and then i stare at the screen feeling mild to intense discomfort#i try to scribble. it comes out Horrible.#i put my tablet away and go stand in the middle of the kitchen#i come back to scroll on tumblr#i feel Despair. rinse and repeat#scribble salad#is it distressing? yes! one more to add to the ever-growing pile!#i need to start pre-packing for my inevitable move#sigh... dont wanna go....#but its not like i have a choice! i quite literally have a single option which is to say! no option at all!#apparently if im in a constant state of severe stress for long enough my creativity completely breaks. shattered right down the middle#too exhausted. the Despair is too strong#and once again i am accidentally venting on a scribble post! sorry! please ignore this im just Saying Shit
348 notes
·
View notes
Text
Call Him By His Name
Thank you for fighting for this world. For believing. Fare you well, my friend -- my inspiration.
#bound with thread | original posts#seal it with wax | art#crystal exarch#g'raha tia#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#trying to remember what tags i put on these other than just character tags oops#anyways have this screenshot redraw that i got way way too invested in making. oops#feat. my own little specbio bits and headcanons of course. as one always does#(i put the art sig for my usual fandom blog on there by muscle memory but yknow what it works. lol)#anyways you ever see a man so beautiful you start crying? yeah? yeah#i've only done shb through watching letsplays so when i eventually get there in my own playthrough i'll draw something like this again#and inevitably cry over this man. because i love him
30 notes
·
View notes
Note
Do you watch any other Star Trek shows other than TOS? What's your favourite piece of Star Trek fanart you've ever done?
I've watched a big chunk of the animated series (honestly felt like a fever dream, I don't remember much. I should rewatch it). Other than that I've been in a constant state of 'I don't know where to watch it' and 'oh no I don't have free time'.
I also have that weird mindset that I can't watch other series if I don't watch tng first (which isn't true but whatever).
I've been meaning to give snw a chance but from what I've seen (all the spoilers I've searched up myself) I don't think I like it? Feels like they're doing that thing where Spock has no emotions except anger. Also (and again, that's a me problem) I prefer watching stuff that's already over. I don't like the wait between seasons, I like consuming everything in one go.
My favorite piece of star trek fanart I've done is something I haven't posted yet, so I guess I'll go with this, for the vibes.
This is pretty nice too
#now fortunately I have a perfectly legal (not) way of watching whatever I want (it's piracy)#I'm also not sure from where to start? I've talked about it before but tng is too long. I don't think I'd survive it#which of the other star trek series would I like? idk. when I get in the 'star trek era' again I'll probably. not start something new?#I'll rewatch the movies and start tas. probably. but I do want to start one of the other like. 10? series#ask#anonymous#not art#text#star trek#I haven't posted that other drawing because I liked it a bit too much and I'm trying to avoid the inevitable#aka I don't want to see it perform badly so I'm just. not posting it. it's been in my drafts for months at this point#mindless. that's what I named it
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
hhhh talking about my writing was fun but 30 tags is not enough.. yes i have 3 major influences but i have minor ones too.. it is a lovechild of my favorite things.. writing is so fun and i have no self control or a concept of pacing myself i will sit there for 16 hours and get hit with every status effect but by god does it all just flow out of me. I've always been a music person yes but i also used to write a lot into early adulthood until The Incident™
but i am ready 2 jump back into it. i think comics are a great middle ground between the two mediums so i don't get As into writing bc i kind of started going crazy last time 🫡 i can take a more structured approach to it that forces me to pace myself and think about it differently. i love art.... i love making things i love knowing how to do things i love knowing how to play things i love having so many creative outlets, even if i don't do a lot of them regularly lol. it is enriching 😳 and nice to know that it's always there to come back to when u want.
#if u want the tea my imagination at the time was like i could space out and straight up just be another person POV doing every little#thing as if i were them for hours and the experience would come together without having to even think about it.#different times/places/contexts/conversations etc. forced 2 to to my mom's lil cult meetings for 2 hours twice a week#i would opt to do these imagination exercises instead to rly put myself in a character's perspective. every step‚ stumble‚#riding in a carriage together for the entirety from point A to B etc. WELL i was working on a horror anthology somewhere 18/19#(that had a small local following 🫶🏾) and it its concept was like the Twilight zone but a lot darker. it was called interdimensional#and the main recurring character never actually shows up in the story. they r an omnipresent god of death who exists everywhere but#exists outside of our realm‚ and it picks random people to reveal itself to as a symbol. it can be apparent or just in passing that#the entry's MC sees it in‚ it will appear on something somewhere and once it's brought up it's a cue to the reader that this person#has just been sent to an alternate reality that leads towards their inevitable death. for the character nothing ever changes immediately#but the different starts to creep its way in‚ as does death's approach at its crescendo but the path's i took to get there were 😨#and after enough entries i started to see the symbol irl and hallucinate some other stuff from my stories and it really scared me#and made me stop 🫡 but i think in retrospect i just went too hard on the imagination exercises and wished i tried cultivating it instead#give myself time to settle and get in control.. but alas‚ she has not written seriously since. to this day it still flows out of me if#i just sit down to do it‚ but i don't think I'm at risk of something like that happening again anymore :3 so yeah ♡ i am learning how to#draw and trying not 2 force it bc i want it to b fun as a little journey for me and i look forward to the day i can come back to actively#writing again too 🫶🏾 i miss it but i also want to b able to draw ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა#learn the hard thing first then do the stuff that comes naturally.... i also want to get back into music sometime but clearly i got a lot of#other stuff to work on 💀 i burnt myself out on it learning too many things and not having enough fun with it anymore‚#but i have a better healthier with art these days and i know it'll be great to come back to when I'm ready 😌💕#i have been considering getting an acoustic or bass guitar tho 🧐 the beauty of physical instruments.. they're just there ready 2 go..#I've been doing mostly digital the past few years‚ when i was making music. it was also rly hard to when i was w my ex ૮ – ﻌ–ა#that's a whole other rant lol. but ugh digital is like u gotta set it up u gotta make space and then u gotta be in one spot the whole time#i just wanna lay in bed and vibe or something yfm.. walk around maybe idk. do something less structured.#maybe.. hm. hmmm 🧐#I'm going to guitar center lol c ya ✌🏾 getting a bass and amp and maybe a guitar too depending on the price
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
gnawing at the bars of my enclosure
#if you saw me listening to the same boney m. song for the past two hours.. no you didn't#powering through the line art before work starts again tomorrow and crushes all my creative energy once more :)#WIP it real good#counting his hair as practise for when i inevitably draw heinrix. fuckass bob squad#mark hoffman
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Bless the ‘Drawing or writing smut to rediscovering creative’ pipeline. I’m actually drawing again all bc I wanted to write my wife 10k words of our dnd ocs banging
#prawn posts#LITERALLY just draw or write horni that is the trick with me#and be medicated probably. but I think hole is the actual fix idk#literally this is what happened when I started drawing again a few years ago (before the depression)#I wanted to draw horni art of my inquisitor#when the inevitable mood drop hits me someone PLEASE tell me to write or draw tiddy I am being so serious
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
So busy with Sparkstember that I almost forgot that I go back to school on tuesday
#honestly maybe it's better this way. i'd rather just not care at all rather than be super stressed about it#just like i've been doing with every little thing for most of my life#might have missed the date when we were supposed to choose our elective courses. well whatever Lol#and i still don't even know what my schedule is or what classes i have this semester oopsie#well the university itself doesn't seem particularly pressed about giving us the schedule either#but i'd probably better still read up on the classes at least before they start#i don't have high hopes for this year just like with the last. probably should just stop pretending that i still want to study anything atp#this wasn't even my first choice of a course bcs i had to prepare for that damn exam to be accepted for my preffered one#but i couldn't be bothered to study for it again which probably should have told me enough abt whether going into this again is a good idea#i'm so tired just thinking about it but i know that actually looking for a job and then having a job will be a thousand times worse so uh#but at least i'd have my own money and start doing something ughhhh. useful maybe. who knows what it will be though#i have no ideaaaaaa. but this feels like just putting off the inevitable. like at some point i need to get my shit together#i will probably report at the end of the next week about how i'm so done already#i don't really knowwww mannnnnm. i don't feel like i had any vacation at all even though 3 months have already passed#and i also sort of didn't prepare something relatively easy to do that would have given me an actual document#that would confirm that i actually finished that part-time school thing last semester#can't really be bothered to come back to it at this point though#well at least i learned something actually useful and interesting from that and that's enough for me tbh#and a lot of it is also relevant to my current area of interest (digital drawing and computer graphics in general)#well speaking of which i'd better just get back to drawing now lol. just one more left to finish!!!#in short i guess that my new way of dealing with stress is just ignoring it all#well it's worked in some way at least so it can't be an entirely bad thing lol#goosepost
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok but i'm just thinking about one of the memory logs for sakura and how mobius tells sakura that what happened to her after her mantis surgery is at least better than what happened to both mobius and kevin after theirs, but from then on, sakura is no longer human and no one else will look at her like a human like before
then you timeskip over to when sakura is trying to save rin from MOTH, and she's arguing with kevin about how the MANTIS soldiers will always be outsiders and a threat to MOTHs because of the surgery. and how this treatment is what makes sakura afraid for rin and inevitably leads to her doom i :(
#yes i was replaying ch 12 again (WELL IT WAS BC I WAS STREAMING FOR A FRIEND)#i think i replay ch 12 way too often somethings wrong with me lmao#idk how to describe the feeling#a drop of water that ripples out over time basically#that instilling of a fear that blows up later#sakura may not care how people think of her BUT FOR HER SISTER YEAH OF COURSE SHE WILL CARE SO MUCH ON RINS TREATMENT#and my god. poor rin.#listen i just really love sakura T _ T#like every rendition of sakura i adore lmao#ik yae sakura is different from sakura but narratively speaking its kinda juicy the repetition of an older sister who loves her younger#sister so deeply that it inevitably kills her#well not kill. she gets trapped in a box in the village arc but still asdfajdlkh#avil plays hi3#IM REALLY THINKING ABOUT IT I WONDER IF SAKURA RANKS OVER FU HUA NOW FOR FAVE CHARACTER BC I THINK OF SAKURA SM LMAO#she actually might be aldkfalasjfh#anyways someday ! i wanna commission someone to draw sakura and lightning switch clothes#i start my job today so i will now be getting money :D#but i have to be very mindful on expenses alsdkjafh
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
ggghhg i hate vehiclessssssss ghghghhghhhhh [dies dies dies forever]
#just me hi#i'm going to get right back to it but i need to complain or i'll turn into a stale loaf of Bread lmao :3👍#so here it is. why's it gotta be so hard hhghfh#okay buildings suck i hate buildings. but also they don't make me want to immediately explode at the merest hint of actually drawing them#vehicles?? Vehicles ???? i am going to just. what if i just put everyone in magical cardboard boxes and did that huh. what is the point !!#i have to draw motorcyclessss and carssssss and i'm okay with bikes to a degree actually <3 and horsessssssss and truckssssssssssss#god forbid you pick an older model with like 20 articles on it cuz most of them are going to only have a side profile and 3/4s view of that#dang thing. which yea sounds manageable 'why is this a problem keeps' i cannot properly see the FRONT#i have to guess?? i have to Guess ???? my dearest wish i think i'm just going to live in the sewers. with the sewer creatures#GGHHHHHHHHHHHH#i am going to practice drawing this stupid thing that i'm going to use for like 7 panels MAX and then i'm going to commit a FOUL crime. lik#rearranging someone's usual playlist without them knowing so they're confused every time they listen to it afterwards#//okay enough of that. we're good hbfhsfh :3#i have done other things today ! i've actually made a rough timeline for pi.e so thaaaat's cool :D#that and found a cool artist to follow on pillowfort. i. forgor their user but they have cool art .w.#/also i'm past the halfway mark on this first chapter which is !!!#i don't want to jinx myself cuz i know i'm really good at that hfhsv - but i think i'll start storyboarding the next part if i can get a#couple more pages done :D#//also the cowboy au grows stronger everyday hhhgfshvbh#i kind of knew some sort of au was inevitable but i did not think it would be an old west one loll :3#still trying to figure out the logistics#i wanna find some good historical fiction from those eras (1860s-70s) but i do not have the brain space for it rn fbhs - so this will do :>#it won't have any of the magic or gods i think bc of that but i'm having fun regardless :D#it Does have some occult though. because i was playing the story for my brother and i Do enjoy scaring him hhbvhfhsfvh#there are devils on the ranch!! or are they devils?? he hasn't gotten that far yet lol :>#//i also may have some sort of weird lean towards the spooky because Somehow each of my stories end up containing some sort of thriller#element?? lmao rip my siblings#but it never happens on purpose. again; rip my siblings hfhhvsh#//oo running out of tag space lol <//3#i shall return. probably with more wip stuff cuz i started like 4 canvases in 2 days hhghghdvs - toodles !!
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sometimes Diluc does wonder if the Delusion left a lasting impact on him, outside the never-fading scars on his arm. That if every time his temper flares or he deals a particularly cruel blow upon his opponent, it’s due to the Delusion’s lingering influence, that it may have altered him to be a crueler person as a result of his near half a decade-long dependence on it.
#hc; diluc#//Sometimes; he even goes as far as to wonder if the Delusion in fact only ENHANCED what was already there#//He’d damn near slain Kae out of anger as it was; anger he’d NEVER once thrown at Anyone before; much less HIM#//Who’s to say he didn’t already have that darkness within him; even considering the circumstances of that moment#//And him continuously—deliberately CHOOSING—using the Delusion only CEMENTED it deep into his self and soul#//He’s had plenty of his share of nightmares where he longs for the Delusion; regretting having Shattered it after its final use#//It was for the best; yes; but now he’ll forever be Haunted by the lack of it; like an addict in withdrawal#//There were times he DID try and cast it away during his years in Snezhnaya; but inevitably put it back on after harrowing nightmares#//He wishes he’d tried harder to get rid of it then; before it left such a lasting impression on him#//Even now; his body is still SO used to & wanting of it; he gets so RESTLESS#//Wanting to reach for and mess with it; only to find it gone and Remember why#//Or the marks it had branded him with start aching and acting up so bad; as though he were Burning from its fire#//Feeling utterly Exhilarated in the face of destruction his flames bring; in dreams or in reality then be Horrified at how much he’d done#//bc he SHOULDNT be proud of that; SHOULDNT delight in such cruel feelings and sights#//Especially when it comes to dealing w Fatui in Mond—the sick delight he feels in fighting/destroying them genuinely scares him at times#//He’s less inclined to feel it when dealing with the Abyss creatures—they aren’t HUMAN after all; but it still sets him at unease at times#//Sometimes particularly scathing remarks toward Kae during their bouts have even him balking#//Not quite rushing to take it back; esp not when Kae hits back harder or brushes it off w his irritating little posturing#//But still enough to make him mull it over afterwards & wonder just how much more resentment he holds for him#//And if he should watch out and make sure it doesn’t get so bad he tries to hurt him again#//He would NEVER willingly want to draw his sword on him ever again; not if he could help it#//no matter what’s become of their bond and how irreparable it must surely be; after all’s said and done#//But if the Delusion had truly sunk its cruel influence so deep into himself…who’s to say how well he can keep up this oath?#//Or smth idk lol
6 notes
·
View notes