#and then i said 'i don't know if we met i'm [name]'

[katarandaa]

The Augmentor part 1

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Pairing: F! reader x Sevika

Set in season 1 between act 1 & 2.

Augmentor: Someone who specializes in augmenting the human body with mechanical or Shimmer-enhanced parts.

Summary: You’re a well-known augmentor in Zaun who - through your sibling Ran - take on a special commission to make Sevika a mechanical prosthetic after her accident.

CW: alcohol use, swearing, smoking,

Word count: 4.2k

AN: this is my first Arcane fic! It's a bit long, but I'm FINALLY happy with it after working on it slowly for WEEKS. This is basically just my MDD universe lol. (There will probably be a part 2). Hope you enjoy ~

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The music from your speakers was blasting in your workshop, you were bopping your head to the beat while working on a rusty prosthetic leg a customer had dropped off for you to fix. Smoke filled your nostrils as the cigarette you put out in your ashtray didn’t completely extinguish. You didn’t hear the elevator doors open and someone entering your workshop until the volume of your music dropped. You quickly turned around to face the elevator to see Ran through your goggles standing by the speaker.

“Ran!” You propped the goggles you were wearing onto your head and smiled at seeing your sibling dropping by for a surprise visit. “Didn’t expect to see you in here today. Your hand need a fix?”

“Hey, no, I actually have something to ask of you,” Ran said as they made their way down the steps into your shop. You put your tool down and spun around on your stool to face Ran, inviting them to keep talking.

“So, you need to hear me out on this one, YN - I need you to do a commission, -” Ran said and leaned on one of your workbenches.

“I don't know Ran; you know I don't really do commissions anymore. Just doing repairs is so much better,” you said the second you heard them say commission, turning your attention back to fixing the metal leg laid out on your workbench.

You had stopped accepting commissions after overworking yourself, and now you ran your business only doing repairs and occasionally some modifications for people who already had mechanical prosthetics. Doing commissions wasn’t easy work, it took months of work, long hours, loads of people involved and a lot of planning, so you decided to take a step back and work on a much smaller scale.

Ran walked closer to you. “It’s an important request, and I seriously need you to consider doing this job. I told them about your work. We really think you’re the best augmentor in Zaun for this job.” Ran flexed their prosthetic hand, which you had made for them several years ago. You sighed again and glanced at their hand before continuing your work.

“It’s a request from Silco - Sevika needs a mechanical prosthetic,” your heart jumped at the sound of her name. “I know you heard of her accident. They know of your previous work, and they want you to do it; they specifically requested you. The pay is really good, it’s from Silco’s pockets, so you’ll be compensated for your time and hassle, and then some.” Ran really tried to sell you this gig, and you could feel the desperation in their voice. “And I know you have a thing for Sevika, you know-”

“I do not!” you interrupted Ran and snapped your head in their direction. “What makes you say that?!”

 “YN, she’s totally your type, and I’ve noticed the way you look at her and act whenever she’s nearby - you get all stiff and nervous.”

You stayed quiet for a moment. “Is it that obvious?” You almost whispered.

“To me it is,” Ran smirked.

You had met Sevika several times at The Last Drop whenever you were out drinking with Ran or your friends. You had never really spoken, but you knew that she knew who you were; all the shared glances, the drinks sent to your table, thanking her by raising your glass in her direction, your blushing and fiddling. You had always been too nervous to approach her; she seemed to distant, and so unattainable.

“Fuck,” you muttered and couldn’t help but crack a smile. “ I don't know. It’s always too much work doing commissions - the clients always have way too high expectations, they never respect the timeframe I give them, they don't pay what they owe. It’s always such a hassle,” you explained, sliding the goggles off your head and running a hand through your hair. “Plus, if it’s for Sevika I’m gonna be all nervous, what if affects my work and I don't deliver her a good product?”

“YN, it’s gonna be fine. Just do what you’re good at. Please just come meet with them, have a chat about your conditions and the pay. I already told them I would talk to you and bring you in for a meeting tonight.”

You tilted your head back and sighed hard, looking over at Ran. “Ok, fine,” you said, and Ran quickly muttered a quiet “yes”.

Ran came running towards you and wrapped their arms around yours. “You’re gonna do great, I know it.” You wrapped your arms around Ran and squeezed before getting up, both of you disengaging from the hug. “And, maybe you and Sevika can get to know each other a little better-”

“Ran!” You interrupted them and hit them playfully on their arm. “Inappropriate! She’s my customer at this point.”

"Alright, fine,” Ran chuckled. “Just, don't promise them anything you can’t deliver. And don’t let them rush you.” Ran squeezed your arm.

“Don't worry, I won’t. Let’s just go.”

-

The atmosphere at The Last Drop was calmer than usual. The last time you visited was to get a few drinks after work with Ran on a busy night. The same night you had seen Sevika sitting at her usual table, cards in hand and a hefty sum of coins in front of her, the other men around the table looking stressed out with their heads in their hands.

Ran leads the two of you through the bar and up the stairs towards Silco’s office. Outside the door were two guards keeping an eye on the people passing by. They saw Ran and opened the door for the two of you, one of them following you inside.

Inside the office, Silco sat at his desk, and Sevika to your left, sitting on the sofa, a cigarette in her mouth and a whiskey bottle and a glass on the table in front of her. You also noticed that her hair was down, and not in her usual half up half down hairdo; it looked good - maybe even cute.

Ran greeted the two with a nod and closed the door behind you.

“Ran, good to see you,” Silco said from the other side of the room, a cloud of smoke swirled around him from his cigar. “This is the augmentor?”

“Yes, sir. This is YN. She’s agreed to come talk over some terms and hear more about the job.” Ran said and sat down at a round table to the right side of the room. You were stood in the middle of the room as you felt Sevika’s eyes on, leaving your stomach in knots.

Silco looked over at you and stood up from his chair behind the desk and walked in front of it. “Alright. What are these… conditions?” He pointed his hand, which had his cigar resting between his fingers, towards you for you to speak.

“Well, first of all, I’m gonna need to know exactly what you’re commissioning,” you said and put your bag on the floor beside the low table to your left. “I’m assuming it’s not just a mechanical prosthetic.” You crossed your arms over your chest and peeked at Sevika, your eyes met for a brief moment before you looked away, to her left arm, or whatever was left of it, which was covered by her cloak.

Silco quickly took the word: “You’re right. It’s going to be used for fighting, as well as just being a prosthetic. Enhance its strength with shimmer, in a way that makes it more responsive and lethal. Find a way for shimmer to be injected into Sevika’s bloodstream in small doses. Obviously it needs to be sturdy and durable; it needs to withstand blows and return them twice as hard. The attachment needs to be secure - no risk of it coming loose, but make sure it's flexible enough for her to move freely. You’re making a weapon, not an ornament. This sound like something you could do?”

You suddenly felt a little nervous having everyone’s eyes on you, waiting for your response. You looked at Silco.

“Of course, not a problem. But if I am to agree to this, I have a couple of terms. I have my own team of doctors and surgeons who are experienced with installing mechanical prosthetics. And if you want the commission to be done faster, I expect a supply of shimmer. I also want one month pay up front before starting the mech.”

Silco was looking at you as you named your terms, almost threatening. “And a few free drinks from your bar would be nice... Sir,” you added. You heard a light chuckle from Sevika at your last comment.

Silco and Sevika exchanged a look before Sevika broke the silence. “Sounds like reasonable terms to me, sir.” She took a swig from her glass, finishing her drink.

“I can get behind your terms. But I need to know an approximate timeframe,” Silco said as he took a puff of his cigar.

“Usually for mechs like this, the planning and design will take about a week, the manufacturing of the arm itself will take anywhere from three to six weeks. Then there’s the installation, recovery and physical adaptation, which I’m guessing in total will be about three weeks at max, but I’m gonna have to hear with my doctors on that one. So, in total, if everything goes to plan, about two months. But with some shimmer, I will be able to work faster and more efficiently, and Sevika’s healing period will also be sped up.”

A silence grew in the room. You could tell Silco was digesting what you just explained. “I imagine that you probably want this to be done much faster, but good work takes time. I promise you that I will make this commission my top priority moving forward. But I’m not going to rush this to a point where I feel like my craftsmanship gets diminished.”

Another silence fell over the room until Silco broke it. “Alright, you’ve got yourself a job, YN. Don’t disappoint me. I will supply you with shimmer. Don't forget that I want it done as soon as possible.” Silco voice way low, almost threatening. He turned his back to you and sat back down behind his desk. “When will you be able to start?”

“I can have you come over to my workshop tomorrow so I can have a proper look at you,” you said and looked at Sevika - she nodded in agreement.

“Great. You two have a plan. You,” Silco said, pointing at the guard standing behind you by the door. “Get the girl her pay.” The guard nodded and left the room, shutting the door behind you.

“I’m gonna need your address,” Sevika leant forward and looked at you with an intimidating look, taking a long puff of her cigarette and exhaling it through her nose. She looked really good. Fuck. You tried to push your thoughts aside; you had to remain professional.

“Oh! Right, of course!” Your nerves had gotten to you. You grabbed your notebook and pencil from your bag on the floor and scribbled down your name and the address, the name of your workshop, as well drawing a quick silly doodle at the end of it out of habit and handed the note to Sevika.

“You enter through what looks like a tinker’s shop, or a salvage shop, you’ll see a sign that says Junk and Joints and loads of scrap in the windows - can’t miss it. Just tell whoever’s in there you’re there for me and they’ll send you down,” you explained. You thought you saw a slight smile tug at Sevika’s lips as she looked at your note.

The door opened and the guard came back with two pouches in his hands. He walked over to Silco who was sitting at his desk reading over some paperwork. Silco looked at the pouches, squinted and waved his hand before looking back down at his papers. The guard walked over to you and dropped the two heavy pouches on the table in front of you. “Your pay.” The guard said and exited the room again.

“Ooh, thank you…” you muttered and looked inside them. In one of them was your money. In the other, vials of shimmer, looking to be enough to last you about two weeks. You put them in your bag along with your notebook.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she looked up at you and gave you a slight nod, her face back to being stern with her cigarette hanging from her lips.

Your heart fluttered for a second before speaking. “Yeah, I’ll see you.” Ran came up behind you and put their hand on your shoulder and walked towards the door. You quickly flung the now heavier bag over your shoulder and exited the office with Ran.

As you heard the door shut behind you, Ran turned to you. “You did good. They seemed to like you.”

“Were you concern they wouldn’t?” you said playfully as you walked down the metal staircase.

“No, not really, but they don't fuck around. You would know if they didn’t like you.”

“Shit ok, I’m glad you didn’t tell me that beforehand - I wouldn’t be able to keep my cool.” You walked to the front door before stopping and turning to Ran. “I’m gonna head to the shop and get started on some ideas. I’ll see you soon.”

“Good luck,” Ran gave you a quick hug. “See you!” You waved at Ran and headed out.

-

You were sitting at your workbench doodling in your notebook with a cigarette between your lips - your music was playing from your speaker, but this time it didn’t drown out the sound of the elevator arriving at your floor. You felt your heart race as you saw Sevika stepping into your workshop.

“This a good time?” she asked and looked around.

You shot up from your stool and picked your cigarette from your mouth. “P-perfect time! Please, have a seat in my so called - living room,” you stammered and gestured to the other side of the room; an old sofa and two armchairs, and a small run-down coffee table with a few old mugs, an empty wine bottle, a candle and an ashtray.

Sevika walked over and sat down on the sofa against the wall as you hurried over to your speaker to turn the music down, now barely audible.

“Alright, so, I’m gonna ask some questions and I’m gonna need some measurements after,” you walked over to ash your cigarette in the ashtray and took a seat in one of the armchairs, notebook and a pencil in hand.

“I got the whole ‘mechanical shimmer arm that deals possibly fatal blows’ shtick,” you waved your hands in the air as you spoke, “but do you have any other requirements that I should know of before I start?”

“The most important part is functionality. If it can’t win me a fight, it’s useless,” Sevika lit a cigarette, taking a long drag from it before continuing. “It needs to have some sort of buff to it.”

“Shimmer can help enhance the hits by hydraulic force, and as Silco requested, I’ll integrate a shimmer system for both injection, infusion and storage - so I don't think you can get more fit for fight than that.”

She nodded. “It also needs to be durable – I don't want you skimping out on the materials here,” she said in a demanding tone. “Don't have the time to constantly come in for repairs. I need reliability with this thing.”

You nodded your head and smirked. “Of course, only the best.”

Sevika scoffed and took another drag from her cigarette. “And it can’t be too heavy, I’m gonna be wearing it outside of combat as well. So don't go too crazy with your fancy mats.”

“Sure, no problem,” you spent a few minutes jotting down some more ideas in your notebook.

“I made an exception for you, y’know.” You broke the silence.

“That so? Why?”

You shrugged. “I stopped doing commissions, but Ran practically begged me to take this job. And when I heard it was for you, the decision was kind of a no-brainer – it seemed important, so I wanted to help.”

Sevika scoffed, smoke from her cigarette exiting her nostrils. “You and Ran close?”

“You could say that,” you smiled and kept your eyes on your notes. “Alright, if that’s all, I wanna get some measurements of you while you’re here,” you said as you stood up and walked over to your workbench to get some tools, as well as a whiskey bottle you spotted on your shelf.

“You want a drink?” you asked and held up the bottle.

“Sure.” She fumbled with the buckle of her cloak for a few seconds before getting it, she swiftly slid it off and left it on the sofa arm. Under her cloak she was wearing a tank top, revealing her broad shoulders.

You grabbed two clean cups from your shelf. “It’s nothing fancy, just some stuff one of my customers brings along whenever she visits for repairs,” you explained as you walked over to the sofa where Sevika was sitting and put the cups and the bottle on the table. You nervously sat down on her left side and poured the two of you a drink, Sevika immediately finishing hers.

Sevika shrugged. “Not bad. I’ve had worse.”

You took a sip of your drink before turning towards Sevika to finally have a look at her.

It wasn’t the first time you had seen an amputee; you had seen several people having lost anything from legs and arms, to hands, feet, fingers, even noses. Prosthetics was your most common request when you took commissions, and you keep repairing all sorts of prosthetics. But Sevika’s amputee scar looked different. The scar had healed nicely and it looked fine - besides the blue lines going from her healed wound up her shoulder and neck to her cheek, and over her chest, her tank top hiding the full extent of it. They looked like scars, and they almost had a blue shine to them. It kind of looked like she had been struck by lightning. You had never seen anything like it; it looked cool, but you would never dare tell her that.

Sevika leant forward refilling her cup with whiskey as you gently touched her shoulder, she briefly flinched at your touch and gave you a nasty side eye, but didn’t pull away.

“I’m gonna have to touch you, y’know,” you said, your voice almost a whisper.

Sevika scoffed and picked up her cup, bringing it to her lips. “As you please,” she muttered and glanced at you. You felt your cheeks go warm at her comment.

Her shoulder was stiff, but you couldn’t tell if it was because of the amount of muscles this woman had, or her being uncomfortable because she was showing you something vulnerable - or maybe a mix of the two. She probably wore the cloak for a reason.

You got on with the prep work, pulling out your measuring tool to measure her shoulder, jotting down the numbers as well as thoughts and ideas in your notebook, even things you might not even need, just to be sure.

“Could you stand up for me?” you asked and stood up, holding out your measuring tool.

Sevika looked up at you and hesitated for a moment before ashing her cigarette in the ashtray on the table and getting up. You almost gasped at her big frame and height as she stood up in front of you, she glanced down at you, waiting for you to do your thing.

Sevika kept her eyes on you with a stern look as you stepped onto the table to get better access.

“Hold out your arm for me?” you asked quietly. She obeyed, and you measured the length of her arm, as well as the width, quietly muttering the numbers so you would remember.

“How close?” Sevika broke the silence.

“What?”

“You and Ran.”

You chuckled at the fact that Sevika had been thinking about your earlier mention of the two of you being close. “Oh, we grew up together – we’re siblings. Their parents took me in when I was a kid.”

You wrapped the measuring tool around her neck and put your hand behind her to grab onto the tool, looking at the measurement.

“People often think we’re a couple. We don’t quite look alike, but if you know we’re siblings you can tell how our demeanors are similar. And we have the same laugh.”

Standing this close you could smell her; she smelled woody, like cigarettes and whiskey. So hot. You gave her a quick glance and saw that she was looking directly into your eyes, and you couldn’t help but feel a small smile tug at your lips.

You snapped out of the moment and stepped down from the table, grabbed your notebook from the table and wrote down the measurements.

You heard a sigh from Sevika as she sat back down. “What the hell are all these measurements for anyway? Aren’t you just making me an arm?” Sevika asked and grabbed her drink.

“A lot of these are just-in-case-numbers; I don't wanna be running around Zaun trying to find you in case I missed a measurement.” You sat back down and kept your notebook in your lap.

“You don't?” Sevika smirked and took another sip of her drink.

You could feel your cheeks get hot again. “Not really, no,” you chuckled. “But if you’re not running around doing Silco’s dirty work, you’ll probably be at The Last Drop.”

“You might be right about that.”

“But – to answer your question, there are a lot of things that go into making a prosthetic arm. I want to get the size of the mech right; don't want it to be loads smaller or larger than your other arm. And I’m gonna be making you a harness.” You took a swig from your drink.

“What am I gonna be needing a harness for?” Sevika asked, her tone was as sharp as usual.

“When you get your arm surgically attached, you’re gonna have to keep it in a harness for a few weeks while it heals. And the weight and feel of the arm is also gonna take some time to get used to - don't wanna fuck up your shoulder. It’s just for the first few weeks,” you explained, keeping your eyes on your notebook. “I don't doubt your strength, but it will get tiring, no matter your physique,” you pointed towards her with your pencil. “Especially if you’re gonna be fighting with this thing.”

“Guess you have a point,” Sevika muttered. “But I can’t be completely useless for too long. I have shit to do - business to deal with.”

“I know you do, but you have to take the healing period seriously. If it doesn’t heal right you’re just gonna make this take even longer.” Your tone was strict.

Sevika just scoffed and took a swig from her cup. Her hand was so big compared to the cup, her fingers to long and her fingernails pristine, which was kind of surprising. You sat there observing her for a few seconds before snapping out of your trance.

“I-uh, have everything I need from you, at least for now,” you put your notebook on the table. “I want you to come back when the first part of the prototype is done so I can make sure it’s a good fit for your shoulder before we commit to anything. Then you’ll also be able to have a look at the blueprints - see if you like the design and stuff.” You leant back into the sofa, putting one leg up, your knee to your chest.

“Sounds good. When do you think that’ll be?” Sevika dragged her cloak back around her shoulders and fumbled with the buckle for a few seconds.

“I think I’m gonna need about a week to design and plan all of it, and about one or two more weeks to make the first parts of the prototype, depending on how long the shimmer Silco supplied will last me.”

“You know how to reach me?” Sevika turned her head to look at you, her face stern, but not intimidating as usual.

“I’ll find a way, but I’m guessing I’ll find you at your usual spot at The Drop.”

“Oh yeah? My usual spot?” Sevika smirked.

“Yeah, I know where you like to sit. Seen you gamble and put some of those crude old men to shame,” you said and chuckled lightly.

“You calling my men crude?”

“Yeah, I am.” You smiled smugly.

“Hm. You might be right,” she grabbed her cup and finished her drink. “Guess I gotta get back to my crude men.” She stood up from the sofa, the weight of her moving shifting you slightly.

“Alright, you do that. I’ll see you in a few weeks!”

“See you.” Sevika gave you a nod and a smirk as she got into the elevator.

[lieutenantbatshit]

CHAPTER 06 - once you go in, there's no turning back (hwang in ho x reader)

>> MASTERLIST

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You focused your gaze on the line in front of you as you await your turn. You felt your stomach grumble a bit, an indication that you were already hungry. You've been so caught up with what's happening in this hellhole that it didn't cross your mind that you needed food. You wished for the food to be good, something nutritious at least. If they were going to let you compete on these games, they might as well at least give you a fulfilling food to prepare you.

The guards hand you a gold, rectangular lunch box and a bottled water. You reached for it, turning your back from the guards as you made your way towards 456's group, who were sitting on the staircase near their self-assigned beds. You had a lot of questions on your mind, especially with why he approached you in the club, and about being the sole winner years ago. You thought it may be a bit bold and abrupt to ask such a traumatizing event, but your gut was telling you to at least ask, to know what was out there.

If he was indeed part of the games back then, he would probably know the next games.

"Ahjussi," you spoke up, earning a glance from 456. You seemed to have interrupted his conversation with player 390. You noticed 456 eyeing your patch, a small smile forming his lips as he saw the X patch. "Do you remember me?"

456, clearly confused, eyed you as if trying to remember you. 390 also shot you a confused look. "I'm sorry, miss. Do we know you?"

You ignored 390, feeling a bit of annoyance as you were talking to 456, not him. 456 seemed to soften his expression as he spoke, "Oh, have we met before?"

"You approached me in the club," you explained. "Then I found you here. Were you looking for something else?"

456 nodded, now remembering. "Ah, yeah I remember," he gave you a reassuring smile, somewhat apologetic. "I'm sorry about that, miss. I was looking for someone else at that time."

"Were you also picked up in the club by these... people?" You motioned your head towards the guards. He nodded, reluctantly meeting your gaze. Just as when you were about to speak again, you heard your stomach grumble.

456 and 390 seemed to hear it, as 390 moved himself and motioned for a space for you to sit. "Oh, you may as well eat with us, miss."

You gave 390 a bow, taking the space beside him. You fixed yourself up as you opened your lunchbox, seeing a good set of rice meal. This was the kind of meal your mother used to make for you back then, a small smile forming your lips as you remember it. At least, there was something comforting in this place, making you remember your mother.

"I don't know about you, but that 20 million wouldn't even cover my interest," 390 said, munching on his food. You noticed 456 staring into space, his expression dark as if he was thinking hard. He didn't bother opening his food. "If we play just one more game..."

"Jung-bae," 456 replied coldly. So, 390's name was Jung-bae, you figured. "Last time I was here, someone said the exact same thing. And in the end, the person died here."

You froze as you took a spoonful of your food to your mouth, slowly eyeing 456. You were correct, you figured only one person can win the total grand prize. There was no way you would make it out here alive.

"Help us then, sir," you looked up and saw Player 001, a crowd of players following him from behind. He kept his gaze to 456, his expression somewhat comforting yet... something. "I pressed the O button because of you. Honestly, I was so scared. I wanted to quit and leave, but you made me think maybe I could just play one more game."

As much as the darkness prevailed in this place, you knew to your gut that he was right. You knew deep inside you that 456 may have wanted to save everyone, stating that he was a winner back then and its consequences of being one. Though the fact that he survived may be a motivation for the others to complete and win the games. The system, not seemingly rigged, was a calculated and precise one.

"Sir," you spoke, the attention turning to you as they waited for you to continue. You felt each eye on you, making you a bit conscious but continued to speak. 456 looked at you, seemingly surprised. "You know which game is next, don't you?"

"That's right," Jung-bae said, putting his food down. "You're a previous winner, so you should know." He moved his face near 456, his question almost a whisper but still loud enough to hear. "What are we playing next?"

456 sighed softly. "The second game was Dalgona."

You heard the bed frame creak from your upper left, seeing a man who continued to eat on his lunch. He bent down a bit, earning the attention of the small crowd you were in. You saw his number, Player 388. "Dalgona? The sugar candy with a shape you can carve out?"

456 nodded. "That's right, we had to choose one of four shapes and carve it out."

You stayed silent as you continued to eat, enjoying the meal despite the commotion around you. You felt Jung-bae move as he positioned himself closer to 456. "Four shapes? Which was the easiest one?"

"Triangle."

"Which was the hardest one?"

"Umbrella."

"Umbrella?" You exclaimed, a bit of rice splashing from your mouth. You quickly covered your mouth, almost choking. You bowed to everyone and apologized. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. So I'm assuming the ones who picked umbrella had no little chance to survive?"

You grabbed your bottle of water as you coughed a bit, trying to calm yourself down. Then, 001 spoke up, the amusement in his expression evident. "Those unlucky bastards must have bitten the dust."

You saw 456 glare at 001 for a bit. You grimaced, thinking maybe 456 chose umbrella last time. You noticed 456 raise an eyebrow but looked away, sighing deeply.

"So, that means we should all just pick triangle," 388 said. "Everyone could probably pass the round."

Player 100 advanced in front, hushing the crowd. "If all 365 of us survive, the prize money won't go up at all. Then we'll have risked our lives again for nothing."

You looked at 100 in disbelief. You couldn't believe how he could think of such, so hungry for money. It added to more to your disgust when you hear the others agree, your thoughts being proven correct again on human greed.

"Listen," 100 whispered. "We should probably keep this information to ourselves. What do you say?" He looked at 001, as if waiting for him to agree. For a brief moment, you saw 001's eyes glance at you. It was so brief that you could miss it in the blink of an eye, but you knew he did.

"We can't do that," 456 retorted, the crowd's silent cheers fading. "I'm telling you this to save everyone's lives. If it's confirmed that the next game is Dalgona, I'm going to tell everyone what I know."

100 only scoffed, turning his back to 456 and walked away, shaking his head in disbelief as he did so. You noticed 001's eyes fixed on 456, as if trying to see his next moves were. You can't help but look at him, his hair pushed down perfectly neat, his eyes holding an emotion you couldn't decipher, his posture composed, opposite to the other players in this room.

001 looked away, his chest heaved as if he took a deep breath. The other players grumbled as they followed 100. The area seemed to be less suffocating as it is, when you decided to speak up again. "What if the games have changed since you won, sir?"

456 shot you a look. In your peripheral vision, you saw 001 look at you. "What do you mean?"

"They said the players are given a new advantage where we could go home and share the accumulated prize money," you explained. "It's a new advantage. I'm assuming in the past game you were in, voting for the games to end will leave you with nothing, is that right?"

456 nodded. You looked at Jung-bae who seemed to consider your words. While 001 kept his eyes on you, listening intently as you analyze the situation.

"They could change the games this time, or every season if they do that," you continued. "We can't be sure that Dalgona would be next."

"She's right," Jung-bae said as he nodded. "They probably know that the previous winner is with us."

You nodded back in agreement. "They have our information, for sure. No one's going to walk out of here with that prize money when someone like you could easily give us information on the new games. In every game, there are rules. One that must be fair and equal for everyone."

You looked at 001, who seemed to be amused with your words, though you could see how he was trying to hide it. You didn't realize how both of you were staring at each other for a minute, only for him to look away and turn his gaze to 456. "May I ask you something?" He sat down near you, feeling your knees brush against his back. "Why did you come back to this place? You said you won and made it out. Then you must've received 45.6 billion." You thought he stopped there, but he continued again. "Did you spend it all?"

"That money doesn't belong to me," 456 said, his tone assertive. "It's blood money for the people who died here." He looked up and pointed at the piggy bank. "The same goes for the money up there."

You felt 001 move his body a bit as you moved your knees away a bit, giving him room to sit back. "It's not like you killed those people, and saving that money won't bring them back to life."

You thinned your lips, the feeling of empathy washing over you as you imagine the lives taken in this place. You were a bit taken aback when you see 456 moving his body near 001, who seemed to hold a tense look in his eyes, filled with frustration. "If you had pressed X, everyone here would've made it out alive."

001 paused, seemingly absorbing his words. You stared at him as he continued to speak, feeling the tension between the two. "That's right, I was the last person to press the O button. But there were more 182 people who chose to stay."

"And there were 182 other people who chose to leave," you muttered, earning a look from 001 in front of you. His eyes stared at you intently, sensing the darkness behind it. You almost regretted speaking, but you couldn't help but retort. As much as you agreed with him, you still held hope that O team would change their minds.

001 didn't seem fazed. In fact, he was able to choose his words carefully. "Let's say, I pressed X and we all left. Would everyone have been happy?" He stated, his tone commanding but determined to make a point. "Do you think if they ran into me later, they'd thank me for saving their lives and tell me they're happy now?" He tilted his head on to you, trying to get an answer from you. You only looked at him sternly, the tension now between the two of you. You clenched your jaw, feeling your heart beat faster through your chest.

Honestly, you didn't know what to say. You never lived a day in poverty, you never felt the need of being in debt nor having to borrow money so you could sustain your needs. If you think about it, you've been risking your life for nothing alongside the other players. You had no place in the game, what more of a purpose? You were simply there for the thrill of it, nothing less, and nothing more. You were set for life, only to throw yourself in this pathetic, deadly situation with the others.

Winning the prize money would grant you nothing. It would just make your bank account accumulate more fortune, but nothing in your life would change at all. You didn't want to admit it to them, but you also didn't want to lose the argument. If you were going to die at this place, you could at least make your stay memorable.

"All right," Jung-bae spoke up, enough to snap you away from your thoughts. "There's no point in placing blame now. You know the saying, a widow understands a widower best." Jung-bae chuckled uncomfortably, trying to somehow ease the tension. "Let's just focus on tomorrow's game okay? He has won all these games before. If we stick together, we'll have nothing to worry about."

"That's right, sirs," the man from your upper left dropped down, turning to face the three of you. "We have to stick together. I'll be with you all the way."

"Who are you?" Jung-bae asked, looking at Player 388.

"I'm Dae-ho. Kang Dae-ho," Dae-ho reached out his hand in attempt to shake Jung-bae's, only to be ignored by him.

You started to space out, still feeling the tension between you and 001. You felt your ego crush a bit, having to lose an argument with him. In all your life, especially in your marketing career, you dominated the industry. You were always ahead of everything, calculating every next move for your plans to work. You worked you way through sales, it's no wonder how your boss promoted you to a higher position, putting his trust into you as their company's percentage continuously goes up, thanks to your help.

001 only proceeded to eat his food, his gaze not leaving you. 456 and Jung-bae turned their attention to Dae-ho, who introduced himself as a former Marine. You stared into space but felt 001's eyes on you. At this point, you started to brace yourself for the next games. You didn't know who he was, what he was capable of. He may remind you of In-ho, but the In-ho you knew would never believe in such a statement that 001 said.

As you finished your food, you chugged on your bottled water. It was a fulfilling meal, at least. You laid back a bit, trying to savor the meal you just had. You almost daydreamed, hoping to get out of this place as soon as possible so you could enjoy more of the meal you just ate.

You jolted in surprise when you heard a loud thud on the ground, seeing 230 beat Myung-gi, along 124. They clearly had no manners, fighting in the middle of meal time. You wished for a guard to come in and stop the two, but they stood still with their guns, letting the commotion continue.

You saw 001 stand up as he brushed Jung-bae and Dae-ho aside, speaking up. "Boys, what are you doing in the middle of mealtime?" He walked towards 230, whose name you heard was Thanos. "No fights during mealtime. There are elders present. Mind your manners."

You looked intently to 001. For a tensed situation as this, his posture remained composed. He looked at Thanos sternly as he continued to speak. "And two against one? Aren't you embarrassed?"

Thanos faced him, eyeing him from up and down as if trying to size him up. He started to walk up to 001, as 124 followed. "You're lecturing me when you ended up in this shithole too?" Thanos scoffed. "Dude, stop running your mouth and take care of your own damn kids."

You could see 001's fist clench, staring darkly to Thanos. Though he didn't flinch as Thanos moved crudely, trying to distract him. 001 tilted his head. "What did you just say?"

Thanos moved closer to 001, eyeing him. "I said save the lecture for your own damn kids."

In just a snap, you let out a gasp as you see 001 grab Thanos by the neck, earning a grunt from him. 124 marched to 001, only to be kicked in the leg by him and kicked him away, leaving 124 groan to the ground.

Thanos seemed to let go from 001's grip, attempting to advance towards 001 to place his fist on to him, only for 001 to duck and punch Thanos on his stomach, earning a groan from him. Thanos raised his hand up but 001 relentlessly twists his arm, his bones cracking as he fell to the ground. 001, seemingly unfazed, kicked him some more.

Thanos stayed on the ground as 001 grabbed his neck, gripping it with his other fist in the air. You stood up, catching more sight of the commotion. You watched as 001's eyes darkened, as if he could break Thanos in a snap. "I'm sorry...." Thanos choked. "Please..."

You noticed 001 charge his fist, then his eyes darted on you, his other hand still gripping Thanos' throat. Your eyes widened, your heart about to burst to your chest. You couldn't but feel shivers down your spine, wondering why he was looking at you as 001 did so. Was he threatening you? Was he trying to prove a point?

One thing's for sure - you didn't want to be on the other end of his hand. There was something dangerous to this man, something deeper than what you see from him right now.

"Let me go..." Thanos begged, his voice starting to strain. 001's eyes slowly softened, letting his grip go, his eyes still on you.

You looked away, not wanting to meet his gaze anymore. You heard the sound of claps and people cheering, but you didn't join them. If anything, you felt your life was in danger. Not because of the games, but how 001 was invested in you, or what seemed to be.

"Ahjussi," you approached 456. "Will it be okay to join your group?"

456 nodded, immediately motioning a space on the bed near him. "Yes, yes. Also," 456 sighed softly. "Call me Gi-hun."

"Gi-hun," you said, a small smile forming your lips. "Thank you. I'm Y/N."

Gi-hun returned your smile, letting you take over the space for you to make yourself comfortable. You heard 001's footsteps approaching, purposely averting your gaze. If there's anything, you needed to survive in this place, so steering clear of 001 could somehow help you.

Yet you couldn't deny the charm he had. As much as you wanted to distance yourself from him, he held his gaze to you that was mixed with curiosity and... longing. Deep inside you, you enjoy the thrill of it, wanting to know more about 001. He reminded you of In-ho, the way he carries himself around the place.

You tucked yourself under the blanket as you notice the other players fixing their beds. In a few hours, lights would be out.

----

"Honey, I'm sorry..." You heard Jung-bae say, his voice drooling as he slept.

You couldn't sleep. Sure, your eyes were closed but you just couldn't fall asleep. You tried counting sheeps, the alphabet, from 1 to 100, but your senses stayed awake.

The lights in dorm were dimmed, the piggy bank with its money shone its light to the room, giving it a warm touch to the room. The lights for X and O shone through the ground. In a few minutes, the lights would be out. Though you wanted to sleep, but your mind didn't want to.

You figured it was just the tension filled in the room as everyone settled on their beds, trying to get some sleep. While some players still chatted with each other, exchanging names and getting to know each other's backstories. You sighed as you heard some of them, hearing how some decided to play to pay for their child's treatment, gambling addiction, got scammed, didn't get their investment back, and so many more. Your heart felt heavy as you listened to their stories, clutching your chest as a sign of empathy.

You heard footsteps approaching near you. You were at the top of the bunk bed, with Gi-hun down you. You looked down for a bit and saw 001, looking at Gi-hun, his face softened this time.

"Excuse me," 001 said, his voice low. "If you're still up, can we have a little talk?"

You felt movement at the bottom, sensing Gi-hun to sit right up. 001 sat on the staircase near Gi-hun. "Sure," you hear Gi-hun say.

You laid back down, trying not to get caught to eavesdrop. You closed your eyes, trying to catch some sleep, but you couldn't help but hear them. "I think I was out of line before. I'd like to apologize," 001 said, his tone soft and sincere this time. "I'm sorry."

"No, that's okay," Gi-hun replied, as if reassuring the latter. "I laid all the blame on you. I was out of line."

You thinned your lips, realizing how Gi-hun could be so nice. As much as you didn't want to trust people in this place, you can't help but feel a sense of trust and hope for Gi-hun. Though for 001, you were still on guard, in case something happens. You couldn't trust someone who could easily grab someone by the throat, almost killing them.

You heard 001 take a deep breath, sighing heavily. This time, his voice held a strain, his vulnerability showing. "My wife is very sick. She has acute cirrhosis. She needs a liver transplant."

You felt your heart drop a bit, kind of hating yourself for it. An unfamiliar feeling washed over you, your emotions debating as it confused you, wondering why you felt this way.

"But when she was going through the tests, we found out she was pregnant," 001 paused, his voice cracking. You couldn't help but peek, turning your head over and saw tears forming in his eyes. "The doctor suggested a termination, but she won't listen. Says she'll give birth even if it kills her."

You furrowed your eyebrows, trying to make sense of his story. You remember the story, seemingly familiar to you.

No, it can't be.

"You see, my wife is stubborn. I've never been able to change her mind about anything. We were struggling to find a donor, and her condition was getting worse," 001 paused for a bit before continuing. "I borrowed as much money as I could, but it still wasn't enough. I was desperate. Then, one of my oldest vendors heard about my situation and offered to help. So, I borrowed money from them. But people saw it as a bribe, and I got fired from my job."

"His wife passed due to a liver failure, or something like that," Jun-ho said, as you opened your mouth in shock. "She was pregnant, noona. Hyung took on a bribe in exchange for his wife's liver transplant, but by the time he came back, she was already gone."

"Where did he go?" You asked Jun-ho, who averted your gaze, his eyes sternly looking into space.

He took a while to answer, his eyes fixed away from you. You put your hand to your mouth, shocked on what you just knew about In-ho. In-ho, who always put others first before himself, the one who saved and comforted you whenever you scratched your knee as you ran down the street, the one who gave you a paper ring.

You looked through your wallet and grabbed the paper ring inserted along your cards, seeing In-ho's handwriting as you unfolded it. There it wrote, "Always and in all ways."

"Always and in all ways," you muttered under your breath. You sat up abruptly, hearing the bed creak a bit. Your eyes widened, your breath hitching as you slowly piece things together, one-by-one.

"I had devoted my entire youth to it. These games were my last hope. I get it. I know what you were trying to say, Mr. 456. What that money represents. But I... I really need that money, even if it's blood money. I need that money..."

A tear fell to your cheek, your heart beating fast as you slowly look down, seeing the man down there as his lips trembled, breaking down.

"...to save my wife and our child," he looked up, staring at the piggy bank. He pressed his lips together, trying to hold his tears back. Then, he looked down, seeing the tears flow to his cheek.

You sniffed, wiping your tears away. Though it was bittersweet to feel happy knowing that you've found In-ho here. You weren't sure if he remembered you, but you hope that even in the slightest, he would. And you were going to make sure of that.

"In-ho..." you whispered, yet you noticed his face slowly looking up to you, his eyes shocked. You wanted to go down there and hold him in your arms. You wanted to tell him you were back for good, and that you're never leaving again.

He heard you. He wouldn't be looking up to you if he didn't. Yet his stare fixed on you, as if he didn't know what to feel. You couldn't tell what his eyes told you, but one thing's for sure, he was surprised. You only gave him a smile and a little wave. You laid back down, turning on the other side as you feel the sleep catching on to you, finally closing your eyes.

Although you couldn't help but see some loopholes in his story. His wife already passed, why was he talking to her in present tense? Something seemed to be going on, as if he had to keep a certain facade. You thought of all the possibilities, but you were too blinded with the happiness that you remembered In-ho, excited for the next day to come.

----

A/N: And sooo, here it is! I'm trying to update as fast as I can so you guys wouldn't wait for too long. I understand the feeling of having to wait a few days before the next chapter comes haha. I'm also thinking of creating a playlist for this series since I listen to music as I write, some of them are based on some songs ���� Let me know if you want me to create a playlist for this series and I'll have it ready in the next few days. 😅 Feel free to leave out your thoughts here, and I'll gladly interact with each and everyone of you. 🫶

Don't forget to leave a comment in this post to be tagged on the next chapter! ✨

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>> MASTERLIST

TAGS: @machipyun @love-leez @enzosluvr @amber-content @kandierteveilchen @butterfly-lover @1nterstellarcha0s @squidgame-lover001  (p.s. if i forget to tag you, please let me know)

[beesgobzzzing]

Melodifestivalen coverage translation collection

From here

Hooja, Mårdis and Käärijä are at the arena.

The trio has spent the night together in a rented cabin outside of Luleå, where they celebrated the release of their single "San Francisco Boy" and now they have just arrived at Mello's press room to answer some questions.

We were first in line and we will post some videos, pictures, and talking points starting now. [Bees note: The article is a live commentary they kept running the whole night, I'm posting the snippets of K and Hooja that I can find]

--

The trio Hooja, Mårdis and Käärijä are soon going to perform their song live, for the first time in front of an audience. Friday's dress rehearsal starts at 19.00.

"It's not going to be just us on stage," Hooja reveals when we meet the trio at Coop Arena.

"And this choreography does demand some coordination. You almost fell down a few times at rehearsal yesterday," says Mårdis.

Is this the biggest number you've ever done?

"It's not just us on stage, like I said, it's pretty big - you can say that, yeah. With all the lights and everything happening on stage. But it is Mello, so that's how it's supposed to be."

--

Regarding the stay at the cabin I mentioned earlier, the musicians took the chance to get to know each other while they're performing at Mello. This was the third time they've met up, previously having met to record a music video and make the song.

On Thursday they rehearsed the number at Coop Arena during huge secrecy, and then they left for their cabin to have a celebratory night.

"We didn't ~party~ [Bees note: when someone up north calls something a party, it's sort of insinuating that you're getting black out drunk], but we did have a bit of a live stream into the late hours of the night when the song was released," Hooja tells us.

Mårdis turned to Jere Pöyhönen (Käärijä's real name) and said:

"Everyone was supposed to sleep at the cabin, but you didn't. Can you tell them why?"

"I don't sleep," the Finn replied, who has never been in northern Sweden before.

--

Hooja-time

All six competitors of the night have performed and we're closing in on the interval act. The expectations on Hooja and Käärijä are high - now we'll see if they can meet them. And how. [Bees note: I think they're referencing a Hooja song called "Levererar" here. It's about delivering a great performance on the dance floor while drunk. So lit. trans. of the wording is "we'll see if they deliver. And what." But it sounds weird to me to put it like that in English without an explanation. ]

--

Synths, inaudible lyrics and DANCE This is the first time we're seeing something this choreographed from Hooja and Mårdis.

Hooja's interval gets the loudest cheers from the audience of the night. Before the song San Francisco Boy there is a clip that shows Hooja walking across the border to Finland.

Then the treadmills start running and the trio works up a sweat (I'm assuming) as they walk briskly for the entire song. Tonight's winners.

[lukolathoughts]

The art of bullying

I have thought a lot about the great literary heroes and heroines I could mention for this blog post. There is Harry Potter, who was so mercilessly bullied by his cousin Dursley and his aunt and uncle that he was forced to sleep in a cupboard under the stairs and even when released from that torment, he was still bullied by his adoptive family until the day they fled Privet Drive. There is also the courageous Jane Eyre who receives similar cruel treatment at the hands of her aunt and cousins and endures so much torment, she cannot bear her own reflection. She is a ghost of her former self. Who could forget Stephen King's Carrie. I think we all remember what happened with the infamous pig's blood scene and lets just say, that didn't end well. There is also our beloved Penelope Featherington who again is bullied by her sisters and mother right up until the end of season three. The bullying of Pen by Cressida Cowper was also agonising for me to watch, especially when she rips Pen's dress in episode one of season three and Eloise does nothing to stop it. It's an arrow to my heart that scene.

I also often return to my girl Elpheba from Wicked. A misunderstood figure simply because she was green and had magical powers. She was not afraid to stand up for the animal community when no one else would. She knew she was different and she embraced those differences to stand against a powerful force who had an army behind him. An army with minions and flying monkeys screeching overhead like locusts waiting to dive down and attack.

I do not pretend to compare myself to Elpheba, I mean I'm no soprano, and I do not think I have magical powers either. I have said consistently that my readings are purely for fun and entertainment purposes only. I do NOT know Nicola and Luke personally. I have never met them. They have no idea who I am. I simply read tarot and give my OPINION. Opinion is NOT fact. I can only read the energy of the cards as they come out. I could be wrong, I am not afraid to say that publicly. I am obviously also a Lukola, so I will admit I probably have some biases. I do try and separate myself from those though and read the cards objectively as I can. If you don't like my posts or content, block me or scroll on past. How are my humble opinions affecting you in your life? I have a small proportion of followers and people who like my readings and that is enough for me.

I have dealt with bullies my entire life. I remember some boys pulling my glasses off when I was five and snapping them in front of me. I have been called the most horrendous names and I'll be honest, high school was tough. But I'm also a strong person as I have endured a lot of crap. I am a mother also and nowadays I don't take much crap. What has always made me different in the views of others is my tenacity and spirit and the fact I will not give up even when the going gets tough. During my teacher training practice, I was paired with the most dreadful person. Lets call her Karen. Very dark energy, but I was also pleasant with her and I tried my best. She was often passive aggressive and made derogatory comments for no reason. Things like this leave me perplexed because I just don't have it in me to be mean to others, especially in real life. I am an empath and whatever energy I give out, I receive it too. It literally hurts me to hurt others.

Anyway, the one day I received a high grade on a teaching observation I had done and Karen said to me that the assessor who had observed me teach must have been having an off day and felt sorry for me. You know sometimes when people say awful things to you and you can't process them properly? This was a moment like that. Until, a while later I realised why she said it. Oh, yes my friends the J word. Karen was as green as Elpheba's face.

Now I'm not saying that the troll who had me mass reported and subsequently had my X account suspended is jealous of me. Not at all, I'm not that big headed. But I did get under her skin somehow, didn't I? So what is it 'matty bee Nicola's wh**e', (I'm sure Nic would love that name by the way - not) what did I do that was so egregious that you set your flying monkeys on me? What seven deadly sin are you conjuring if not envy, is it wrath? Did the call come from higher than you? Or is it hurt pride that that I might be right? Is that what scares you? I mean if I'm sprouting lies and nonsense, what is there to fear from me right? I'm just some nutcase tarot reader on the internet. No threat at all.

Or is it your lust for Nicola that has made you so hateful? In my last blog I wrote about the split within in the fandom. I failed to mention the solo Nicola fans who would hate to see her with either Luke or Jake and it's not because they think she is better off without a man and we should celebrate Nicola's achievements solo, it's because they want Nicola for themselves. It is some messed up stuff in my opinion. Luke being in the background these last few days must be incredibly triggering for both the Jakeholes and the Solo Nic stans. So they come for me and come for me they did indeed. In droves and not only that, they admitted it gleefully all over the X timeline and in their little group chats. How stupid have you got to be to admit this publicly? I also know that if I have received bullying then Nicola and Luke have received it tenfold. is it any wonder they are barely active on social media these days. Keyboard warriors think they are clever hiding behind their screen, but it's just pure cowardice.

There have been others bullied off their social media platforms by these trolls and they know who they are. They went one step further with me and forced me off. It is actually quite funny, because it won't stop me talking. On the contrary, dear Watson. Nothing short of a kamikaze missile is taking me down. I am here to see this through come hell or high water.

What happens to Cressida Cowper at the end of season three of Bridgerton? Spoiler, but she is penniless, unmarried and being shipped off to the country with her aunt while simultaneously Colin and Pen christen their marriage bed. The Wizard is banished from Oz on his hot air balloon. The Dursley's end up losing their home and sanity. What I'm trying to say is, what goes around comes around and small victories can often lead to bigger losses.

[hashimasims]

Minthe: We were not digging. There are no shovels available and it would be quite difficult to break through this concrete. Unless you meant that we were digging for information, in that case then yes I guess we were. Isn't that what people do when they meet one another?

Isiah: SEE! Like that! No one talks like that. Are you an Alien or something?

Minthe: Half-Alien actually

Isiah: WOAH really? I was just joking but that's kinda cool actually. Explains the weird tattoos, though since you're an Alien -

Micah: HALF-Alien! Weren't you listening?

Isiah: Right, half-alien, I guess they're more like birthmarks. Anyway, there were two other students behind me I met at the house, Kaylee and Braden, I thought they were right behind me but apparently not? OH there you guys are!

Braden: Sorry got lost. Sightseeing and all that. What we miss?

Isiah: Is that what we're calling it these days? Not much, our Guardian lady isn't here yet. This is . . . sorry I don't think I heard you say your names.

Micah: I'm Micah and this is my Bestie Minthe! SHE'S AN ALIEN! Isn't that just EPIC! #OUTOFTHISWORLD!

Minthe didn't know when she and Micah became "besties" but she wasn't going to contradict her. Maybe the two of them could be best friends.

Kaylee: NICE! Is that all of us now? I thought the email mentioned six students? Or was it a typo when it said "five others"?

???: Now it is! I'm here, I'm here. Sorry, running a bit behind. I'm . . . K . . . K . . . Kevin. I'm Kevin.

The poor guy truly seems out of breath. It is not a great distance from the dorm to here, maybe a three minute walk, so why did he full sprint run here from the dorm? Unless he had a fear of being late, which to her was a very legitimate excuse.

Minthe: That's alright, our Liaison has yet to arrive so technically you are not late. I'm Minthe, nice to meet you. Please, sit down and rest. Shall I go get you a glass of water?

Beginning|Previous|Next

[gravesfill]

tw : implied animal attack.

i am what i am but we are not the same. it is no good speaking of fairness — the fools errand.

a cat has been following him.

he hasn't seen any aggressive characteristics with it — not even a snarl or a hiss. it just lingers on the outskirts of the treeline, watching, waiting, padding down onto the dewy grass whenever hesh starts his morning run or late night trudge. a calico — with its wide eyes and chipped ear and orange patches.

hesh has tried to feed it a couple of times, greasy slabs of meat and even bowls of condensed milk, only to be met with a few tentative steps closer, before it flinches at nothing and scurries off into the deep thicket of the woods. hesh only has the energy to sigh these days.

"you got a new friend," merrick half-laughs. hesh doesn't say anything. he receives a hard pat on the back and a lingering chuckle. "don't let riley see that thing!"

"i should probably name you, but it'll be a little weird to name you after him."

hesh says to the cat as she trots after him a few paces behind him. even when he stops, she stops. he doesn't even have to look, either. all he has to do is stop talking, and when everything falls quiet and he can only hear his own unhurried footfalls, he can catch the soft distant sound of rhythmic tapping against asphalt.

"plus, i think you're a girl."

a sheepish laugh. he looks over his shoulder, and there is only road and sky and field. hesh begins picking up the pace.

— let me tell you how much i've come to hate you since i began to live.

"you remind me alot of him."

he says and then waits, as if the animal will understand what he said and come out into the light of their makeshift base. but no such thing happens, only soft rustling and the gentle purring, just outside the light.

somehow, it all feels warmer and louder. the generator, the bulbs flickering, the hushed quietness of the night. wildlife. an odd howl. the wattage buzzing and humming loudly, crickets. something sharp.

"my little brother. i loved him a great deal. something awful happened to him way back when, but look at me, rambling."

hesh sets down a bowl of meat. cheap cuts.

"i just wished you'd let me in. let me touch you. cradle you, hold you. i would protect you, yeah? here, I'm feeding you. had to get my hands all dirty to cut it, haha."

grating. louder.

"i just wish you would let me love you. do you wanna know my brother's name?

it was —"

and the lights go out.

his eyes were too used to the flickering bulbs of the bases' flood lights. all he sees is black and black and black and black. then, the rustling sounds louder. the soft purring turns into a rumbling growl. nighttime surrounds them both.

beast and man.

hesh tries to turn, run, but he goes down, tripping on something hard. his ears ring when his head hits the ground and he's left winded, wheezing into the night. he tries to call for merrick, keegan, but they're not in there. he's not at base. he's alone and logan is gone and he tried so hard to keep him safe but the —

there’s heavy steps behind him. those claws clicking, tapping, rapping, dragging.

he can’t think, can barely breathe, can barely see over the blood clogging his eyes, but he has to say it. he has to.

"—logan."

nine; separation. — i was an angel, though plummeting. the stars are as beams shining through the wheel.

i am sure that hell must be cold.

[tricoufamily]

give me something that'll haunt me when you're not around

[cosmogyros]

.

[daz4i]

i am aware i will sound. ig ignorant is the right word here? but every time like. i watch a wendigoon video where he brings up his connection to religion. or when he brings up other creators of horror content who are religious and use it in their horror. i am so baffled

like to me, from all the people i met throughout my life (both jewish and christian), it's hard to think about religion as a good thing. i know more people who are ex-christians or ex-orthodox jews than ppl who believe in god (or rather, the ppl i do know who believe in god, aren't really people i was ever close to. more like neighbors in my old building). religion is something that has been traumatic to most people i know who had any connection to it. i personally see it as something that's been forced on me and is still forced on everyone in my country regardless of if we believe in it or not, ever since we were kids

(not to mention my personal gripe with god as a trans + disabled person lmao. my biggest enemy fr)

so seeing people treat religion as something positive is. ig the best word here is. alien to me. people using it in horror not as the thing that's horrifying (or rather, using demons as the thing that's horrifying, rather than the god fighting them) just feels wrong

logically i know people find meaning in it. i heard stories of belief saving people's lives. i have met people who are incredibly sweet and still religious (tho, i can count them on one hand). but at the same time, as a whole concept, and the way its people are currently working to ruin the lives of almost everyone in my country besides themselves, i can't help but view it as something vile. the things it makes people do are awful. the wars it causes. the human rights being trampled because of it. it's hard to imagine how someone could be entrenched in it but come out kind while still holding onto faith

[acourtofquestions]

Golden flame danced between her fingers.

Elide recoiled, and the fire vanished as quickly as it had appeared.

"My name is Essar," the female said softly. "I am a friend--of your friends, I believe."

Elide said nothing.

"Cairn is a monster," Essar said, taking a step closer. "Stay far from him."

"I need to find him."

"You played the part of his mistreated lover well enough. You have to know something about him. What he does."

"If you know where he is, please tell me." She wasn't above begging.

Essar ran an eye over Elide. Then she said, "He was in this city until yesterday. Then he went out to the eastern camp." She pointed with a thumb over a shoulder. "He's there now."

"How do you know?"

"Because he's not terrorizing the patrons of every fine establishment in this town, glutting himself on the coin Maeve gave him when he took the blood oath."

Elide blinked. She had hoped some of the Fae might be opposed to Maeve, especially after the battle in Eyllwe, but to find such outright distaste...

Essar then added, "And because my sister--the soldier you spoke with--told me. She saw him in the camp this morning, smirking like a cat."

"Why should I believe you?"

"Because you are wearing Lorcan's shirt, and Rowan Whitethorn's cloak. If you do not believe me, inform them who told you and they will." Elide cocked her head to the side.

Essar said softly, "Lorcan and I were involved for a time."

They were in the midst of war, and had traveled for thousands of miles to find their queen, and yet the tightness that coiled in Elide's gut at those words somehow found space. Lorcan's lover. This delicate beauty with a bedroom voice had been Lorcan's lover.

"I'll be missed if I'm gone for too long, but tell them who I am. Tell them that I told you. If it's Cairn they seek, that is where he shall be. His precise location, I don't know." Essar backed away a step. "Don't go asking after Cairn at other taverns. He isn't well regarded, even amongst the soldiers. And those who do follow him... You do not wish to attract their interest."

Essar made to turn away, but Elide blurted,

"Where did Maeve go?"

Essar looked over her shoulder. Studied her.

The female's eyes widened. "She has Aelin of the Wildfire," Essar breathed.

Elide said nothing, but Essar murmured, "That was... that was the power we felt the other night." Essar swept back toward Elide. Gripped her hands. "Where Maeve went a few days ago, I don't know. She did not announce it, did not take anyone with her. I often serve her, am asked to... It doesn't matter. What matters is Maeve is not here. But I do not know when she will return."

Relief again threatened to send Elide crumpling to the ground. The gods, it seemed, had not abandoned them just yet.

But if Maeve had taken Aelin to the outpost where they'd lied that the Valg prince had been contained...

Elide gripped Essar's hands, finding them warm and dry. "Does your sister know where Cairn resides in the camp?"

For long minutes, then an hour, they had talked.

Essar left and returned with Dresenda, her sister. And in that alley, they had plotted.

Elide finished telling Rowan, Lorcan, and Gavriel what she'd learned. They sat in stunned silence for a long minute.

"Just before dawn," Elide repeated. "Dresenda said the watch on the eastern camp is weakest at dawn. That she'd find a way for the guards to be occupied. It's our only window."

Rowan was staring into the trees, as if he could see the layout of the camp, as if he were plotting his way in, way out.

"She didn't confirm if Aelin was in Cairn's tent, though," Gavriel cautioned. "Maeve is gone--Aelin might be with her, too."

"It's a risk we take," Rowan said. A risk, perhaps, they should have considered.

Elide glanced to Lorcan, who had been silent throughout. Even though it had been his lover who had helped them, perhaps guided by Anneith herself. Or at least had been tipped off by the scent on Elide's clothes.

"You think we can trust her?" Elide asked Lorcan, though she knew the answer.

Lorcan's dark eyes shifted to her. "Yes, though I don't see why she'd bother."

"She's a good female, that's why," Rowan said.

At Elide's lifted brow, he explained, "Essar visited Mistward this spring. She met Aelin." He cut a glare toward Lorcan. "And asked me to tell you that she sends her best."

Elide hadn't seen anything that came close to pining in Essar's face, but gods, she was beautiful. And smart. And kind. And Lorcan had let her go, somehow.

[raplele]

I think she's really the one!!!! I know I said that about the other 5 but this time it's different !!!!!!!

it's gonna work out once and for all and then I'll never be lonely again

[classicintp]

Goddammit I miss that cat.

[fazcinatingblog]

Why is there a random guy doing that shaka hand gesture, only in Hawaii amirite

[babybluebanshee]

So I finally got my water heater replaced after more than half a year of it leaking and nearly destroying my floor, but that's not the story. The story is of the handyman that installed it.

Dude's name is Chris, and he's your typically midwestern schlub - friendly, apologizes too much, really likes the Cardinals, maybe a little younger than my parents. Hella nice tho, gets the heater installed quickly, and even offers to fix the floorboards it warped (after nearly tripping over the hump it made in the floor twice). Overall, a stress-free experience.

Then, as he's gathering up his tools - "So, I noticed your, uh, banner. Over your bed."*

*(The closet where my water heater is is located in my bedroom because I live in a mobile home, dude wasn't just wandering creepily into my bedroom)

He's referring to a giant pride flag that's hanging over my bed, with the words "Sounds gay, I'm in"

My anxiety spikes instantaneously, thinking oh christ I'm about to get hatecrimed or at least microaggressioned.

But then he says "Yeah, my daughter is gay, and I was wondering, like...where do you guys, ya know, meet up?"

What.

"Because she met her most recent girlfriend when she was in jail, and I keep asking why she doesn't just find a nice lesbian librarian or something and she said 'dad I know they're out there, I just don't know where'. So...like...where do you?"

So I ended up confessing to this nice man who installed my water heater that I don't know of any real gay culture in our mostly Baptist Missouri town of about 18,000 that routinely freaks out over pride displays in the library (I'm sure it exists but I'm lazy and haven't gone looking for it). My girlfriend lives in an area with a rather bustling gay community (we just did a face painting booth for their pride festival a few weeks ago), so maybe have her go out there with some friends, and also a lot of queers I know play dnd so maybe find a nice group of them and network. I then apologized that I wasn't more helpful in getting his daughter settled with a nice, wholesome dyke.

On the plus side, he was not deterred at all, and seemed to be very interested in the fact dnd was so popular amongst the el gee bee tees. I told him the names of some dms I know and told him to go to town. I do not know if the names will be given to his daughter or hoarded for himself so he can join a group and play like he did when he was a teenager and not be called satanic for it.

He's coming to fix my floor next week.

[poguelandiarafe]

showered in secrets | drew starkey

pairings - drew starkey x secretgf!reader

warnings - smut, unprotected sex (p in v)

summary - you and drew are in a secret relationship. or at least it’s a secret until drew forgets it is and follows you into the shower, prompting madelyn to interrogate you as to what he was doing.

masterlist

--------

the house is buzzing with excitement, the kind that only comes from the anticipation of a night out with your closest friends. you, along with drew, madison, jonathan and chase have decided to get ready at madelyn's house and have some drinks there before going out.

you're always at her house due to living close by and she always jokes about how you may as well move in from how often you're there, even to the point of having your own drawer full of clothes, shower stuff and a spare toothbrush. it's perfect for an impromptu sleepover.

"mads, can i use your shower please?" you ask, already going to grab your stuff.

"course, you know where it is." she replies, flashing you a smile.

you grab your stuff and a fresh towel and disappear into the bathroom. the sound of the shower running fills the bathroom as you step in, taking a minute to relax in the hot water. you're wrapped in your thoughts, unaware of drew letting himself in and calling out madelyn's name when he's met with a seemingly empty apartment.

----

meanwhile, drew is looking for you, a frown on his face when he sees you're not in the kitchen or living room. his frown deepens when he sees you're also not in madelyn's room while she's doing her hair.

"hey, is y/n here yet? thought she'd have been the first one here. not me." he asks, leaning against the doorframe.

"she was actually," madelyn laughs, curling the last piece of hair, "she's just in the shower."

"oh, thanks." drew smiles, already making a beeline for the bathroom before he has a chance to realise what he's doing.

"drew?" she says, but he's already gone, "she's showering!"

his brows furrow in confusion, wondering why that was an issue, forgetting your relationship was a secret, "yeah, i know!"

stepping into the bathroom, the steam surrounds him and he takes a few seconds to stare at you, not having noticed he's in there.

"you should lock the door you know." he smirks, leaning against the door.

his voice snaps you out of your thoughts and you spin around, eyes widening in realisation that he might've just blown your relationship.

"what are you doing in here?" you hiss.

his smirk falters once the realisation seems to register and you watch as his eye widen, mouth opening to say something but nothing comes out.

"oh my god, drew." you groan, a sigh leaving your lips.

"shit." he chuckles awkwardly, "i asked madelyn where you were and she told me you were showering and well, i've never really not thought about joining you in the shower and i didn't realise and i'm so sorry i-"

"come here, stop rambling." you cut him off, reaching a hand out with a soft smile on your face.

stepping towards you, he grabs your hand and places a gentle kiss on your knuckles. your heart melts at the way he's looking at you and you can't help but lean forward and cup his jaw to bring him into a soft kiss.

"are you mad at me?" drew asks.

"no, but you have to sometimes think before following me into the shower."

his smirk returns and there's a playful glint in his eye, "i do think about it. that's why i always end up in the shower with you."

you roll your eyes but don't stop the giggle escaping your lips, "you're impossible."

drew hums in response before letting go of your hand and pulling his shirt over his head wanting to join you. you go to tell him it's a bad idea but he's already kicking away his trousers and boxers and stepping in, his tall frame towering over you.

"you know, i don't think mads would appreciate if we fucked in her shower." you mumble, but a smile tugs at your lips regardless, arms wrapping around his neck.

"hey, i said nothing about fucking," he leans closer, arms sliding around your waist, and whispers, "but i reckon we have at least a bit of time before she gets too suspicious, don't you?"

you scoff, shaking your head from his boldness, "you're a bad influence, drew."

"yet you still love me." he mumbles, starting to kiss your shoulder, trailing up to your neck.

"course i do," you reply with a genuine smile, "always going to."

drew smiles against your skin and playfully bites at your neck, teasing you. you're so close to giving in, enjoying the feeling of his lips on your skin and large hands gripping your hips to keep you in place. glancing at the door, you bite your lip, contemplating, knowing your friends might be just down the hall by now.

"fuck it."

pulling his face from your neck, you stand on your tiptoes and capture his lips in a heavy kiss. he reacts instantly, walking you a few steps backward until your back is pressed against the cool tiled wall. the kiss is intense, messy, desperate, making you forget all about the fact your friends are probably wondering where you two are.

he pulls back, breathless, "gotta be quick."

rolling your eyes, you tease, "wow, romantic."

"shut up." he murmurs, but there's no malice in his words, "don't have time for foreplay baby, you gonna be okay?"

"mhmm, i'll be fine."

drew's arms encircle your waist again and lift you up, letting your legs wrap around him. your fingers play with the hair at the nape of his neck and you look down in between your bodies, watching as he strokes himself a few times.

"ready?" he asks, noticing the way your breath hitches when he positions himself at your entrance.

"yeah."

he pushes forward, both of you letting out a low groan at the feeling. the stretch is teetering on the edge between pain and pleasure, your jaw dropping in a silent moan. slowly, he continues to fill you until he's bottomed out, patiently waiting for you to tell him to move.

"shit," he moans when your pussy clenches around his length, "feel so good baby, so tight."

"move." you breathe out, head lolling forward to rest on his shoulder.

the sound of skin slapping soon fills the small bathroom and you can't help but bite down on drew's shoulder to silence the moans threatening to escape.

"look at me," he demands, forcing you to lift your head and look at him, "you okay?"

"harder," you beg, pulling slightly at his hair, "please."

immediately, he complies, thrusting deeper and harder than before. you don't even realise how loud you're being until drew's lips are back on yours in an attempt to silence you.

you throw your head back when a particularly harsh thrust hits your g-spot perfectly and drew takes the opportunity to slide a hand down to rub circles on your clit.

"c-close." you whine, squirming in his arms due to your high quickly approaching.

as much as he loves to hear every moan and noise he can draw out of you, there's not a chance your relationship has the chance to stay a secret if he doesn't cover your mouth when you cum. so, he tells you to take over rubbing your clit and his hand covers your mouth instead, knowing any second now your high would hit you.

"cum for me y/n." he encourages, "come on pretty girl."

seconds later, your back is arching off the wall into his chest as your orgasm rips through you. his hips stutter, the feeling of your pussy clenching around him triggering his own orgasm.

"fuck, fuck, fuck." drew moans, his cum shooting into you.

his hand drops from your mouth, uncovering your giddy smile. you don't know how he still has the strength to hold you up, so you press a quick kiss to his lips and let him set you down, though your legs still feel like jelly.

"i love you." he mumbles, hands squeezing your hips as if emphasising his point.

"i love you too. think anyone heard us?" you question, grabbing your shampoo bottle, since you do still need to properly shower.

"probably."

----

ten minutes later, you're standing in front of the mirror staring at a faint hickey that's starting to form on your neck. clearly, your 'no visible marks' rule has gone out the window. you'd kicked drew out before getting on with washing your hair, not needing any more distractions. but now you wished you hadn't purely to get the chance to scold him for leaving a mark.

a voice brings you back to reality, "y/n? you out the shower? i need to pee."

it's madelyn.

"uh, yeah hold on!" you call back, readjusting your top and sorting out your hair, attempting to cover the mark.

when you open the door, she stands there, arms crossed. she's looking over you as if she knows something but can't quite figure out what.

then she spots it. what you thought was a faint mark turns out to be getting darker the more time passes. she decides not to bring it up though, wanting to see what you'll admit to her first.

"thought you needed to pee?"

"not anymore," madelyn replied, stepping into the bathroom and closing the door behind her, "took you ages in the shower, you shaving your legs or something?"

you narrow your eyes at her, trying to figure out if she's being genuine or if she knows something. normally, she's easy to read, but now you don't know.

"just wanted to relax before the chaos hits soon." you gulp when she asks the next question.

"any idea why drew's hair was dry when he got here and it's now wet? or why he seemed to disappear for twenty minutes?"

your stomach flips and you can hear your heartbeat in your ears. pathetic excuses fill your mind, excuses you know she'll never buy in a million years and you don't know what to say.

"what? how would i know? why're you asking me?" you laugh dryly.

"cause i know he had the whole 'greasy bangs' phase but i know drew enough to know he'd never be seen in public wearing this much hair gel and i don't have some luxurious pool he could've been using while i was finishing my hair."

"maybe he just... i don't know, splashed some water on his face or something?" you stammer, avoiding her gaze.

"okay, now i know you're lying. spill, i know something's going on with you two." madelyn smirks.

you sigh in defeat, "fine, but you can not say a word to anyone. i mean it."

her eyes light up and she nods quickly, "i promise. not a word. please tell me!"

you look between the door and her for a few seconds, thinking over the pros and cons, but she's your best friend. you have to tell her.

"i-uh, okay. me and drew are together. and not in a 'friends with benefits' kind of way. like, we're dating, have been for about four months," madelyn's jaw dropped, her hand covering her mouth, "but it's a secret so please don't mention it to anyone later. you're the only one that knows."

"oh my god, i knew it. you're so cute together." she squeals, hugging you.

"keep your voice down!" you whisper-shout but return her hug nonetheless.

"i want details later." she pleads.

"yes boss."

"also, i know you guys totally just had sex in the shower. i don't care, but if you don't want anyone to find out, cover the hickey. the hickey makes it so obvious." she winks at you before leaving the bathroom.

yeah, you definitely need to cover that.

[neep-neep-neep]

.